#something big is coming tomorrow
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[Los is found asleep at their desk next to a poem, holding a pen in their hand]
[Interestingly… The entire poem is written in gold ink.]
The skin melts
Melts
Melts
████
Freckles and moles meld into one
A spot on your back like a black hole
My hands traced your skin like ██ ██ █ ██
But my touch was gentle, █████ ███
You were undeserving
I was too forgiving
I learned it too late
In a fit, I ████ and punched you
My hand impaled your burning flesh
But the inside was broken glass
And my hand began to bleed
████ ██ ████ ████ █ f██
████ █ e█a█ ██ █t█
██ ██ h███ █ ██ ██ ████ ██ ██
█ ██ ██ █ █e█
█ ██ ██ █ ██r
█ ██s ██
Kindred spirit
#los dv#something big is coming tomorrow#i decided i��ve waited long enough. time to move the story forward#edit: okay maybe not tomorrow. but definitely soon i promise. i just have another plot point to finish up first
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it's hard loving yourself
#i can't keep lying to myself#how do you love something that is so unlovable#i'm poison. i come from poison. i have poison inside me and i destroy everything i touch. that's my legacy.#i pour alcohol into the gaping hole inside my chest. it does not heal. not today. maybe tomorrow. maybe it wont heal ever#smoke fills my chest . empty it can be#yet so full of your absence#im nothing but an empty husk of what I once was#and a big part of me was already forcefully ripped away from me when you left#hello hi im back with ghoap angst#can you believe its been a whole week since i drew them#anyways#gummmyart#doodle#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#soapghost#ghostsoap#angst#implied mcd
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We don't talk enough about Grantaire's choice to die from Enjolras' point of view.
I think it meant so so much to Enjolras. Think about it, everything Enjolras believed in just failed. He watched all his friends die in a fight he led them in. The people did not rise. He must have been thinking he was wrong, wondering if there was ever any point in anything he did.
Then Grantaire shows up. The man who disagreed with him, the skeptic who didn't believe in anything, shows up and says he does believe in the revolution and is willing to die for it.
Grantaire is proof that everything Enjolras did was not in vain. He made a believer out of the faithless. The people of Paris might not have risen to their cause, but this one single person did raise up, and someday, others will to.
The revolution didn't happen then, but it would happen eventually. Grantaire is evidence of that.
#les mis#Enjolras#Grantaire#enjoltaire#exr#les mis meta#les mis analysis#Les Miserables#Also not dying alone is good too and certainly brought him comfort#but I still think the big thing is that Enj dies knowing his and his friend’s life work mattered#it is like the whole theme of R as a character#he represents the people so when R changes enj knows the people will to#there will be freedom even if he is not there to see it#something something when tomorrow comes something something
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ya know it’s probably just a design choice buut it would be really funny that Troy’s not a natural blond bc his eyebrows are black (in the official art that i could find anyway lol)
#i can just IMAGINE this man dying his hair in a panic before a big race or something#or like#at some point in the groups journey#his roots start coming out and he freaks lol#HOWEVER runts eyebrows are also black so im willing to bet it’s a design choice#ooo or they’re hair dye besties#my wrist will kill me if i try to draw this rn#so mayhaps tomorrow#anyway im not a big troy fan atm like so sorry besties he’s funny but i can’t with him yet lol#awaiting his redemption arc#or for him to double down djdjdj#just roll with it#jrwi wonderlust#troy lougferd
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[Reblogs appreciated, click for better quality]
fire cleo, fire.
#zombiecleo#zombiecleo fanart#hermitcraft#hc9#mcyt#mcyt fanart#rare sketchbook#i just wanted to post something tonight so i made this#big hermitopia fanart project coming out tomorrow
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HAPPY VALENTINE DAY!!!!
awwww happy V-Day to you too!!!!
(lookie! Eyhm found one more Valentine to give out!!)
#wheeeeeeew okay 4 drawings in one day!! i think i'm done till tomorrow heh#but there's a VERY good drawing thing i'm going to be making coming up ;)#my art#eyhm stuff#pizza tower oc#but now i Big Sleepy. prob just gonna play pokemon or something till the lure of comfy bed takes me...
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i couldnt upload the audio like a normal person so heres this. gonna try to animate to it tomorrow :P
#my post#i love making audiossssssssssss#i have it like mapped out i just havent drawn anything yet#so the beginning 'i may not live to see out glory' n all that- thats diagetic thats all of em in lmanberg. rev era.#'raise a glass to freedom' is them going off to fight. 'something they can never take away' is the big battle#'no matter what they tell you (it was never meant to be)' is the fcr#(the short intrumental is tommy picking himself up looking furious)#'raise a glass to the four of us' is them getting their independance. 'tomorrow therell be more of us' yay niki n jack are here!!#'telling the story of tonight' is them all around a campfire having a good time. 'theyll tell the story of tonight' is a more closeup of#cwil still in this same moment and he just looks tired.#'raise a glass to freedom' is the election#'something they can never take away ( dear citizens tonight that changes)' is schlatt winning and banishing tommy n will#'no matter what they tell you' is wilbur in the button room#'(this isnt over) lets have another round tonight' uhhh idk man pogtopia things#'raise a glass to the four of us' is the four of em coming back together#'tomorrow therell be more of us' is the bit on the 16th where theyre charging off to battle on the railway. and wilbur lags behind and#watches them all run ahead.#'(it was never meant to be) telling the story of tonight' is wilbur pressing the button and lmanberg exploding#then its just the general chaos of the battle#'if we dont win this fight there will be no tomorrow' is a shot of tommy n tubbo sticking together. as they always do in a fight.#'let me tell you a story tommy' is technos big speech (i know it happens before wilbur pressed the button let me have this)#'nothing beside remains' is fundy standing over the ruins. and he looks up to see phil kill wilbur#the last 'story of tonight' shows the camarvan in old rev era lmanberg. at night. the lights are on and you can see people inside.#smilessss
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things aren’t going well with peach. while i think my dad’s very right to be concerned that she hasn’t eaten anything in nearly 60 hours (obviously i am too), im becoming increasingly concerned that she hasn’t slept at all in around 36 hours and prior to that she was under anaesthetic, which isn’t exactly restful, so it’s closer to 48 hrs
like dad took her back to the vet today and we’ve got injections for her painkillers now because she’s not eating, and also injections for fluids (because she doesn’t drink; she only gets water from her food), so the not eating is Bad but also kinda under management, but if she doesn’t sleep soon i’m extremely worried. dad was like ‘if she doesn’t eat by tomorrow afternoon we’ll take her back because the injections will run out’ but like. if she doesn’t sleep tonight we have GOT to take her back first thing in the morning so they can sedate her or something
#her pain doesn’t seem to be too bad now that she’s got pain relief so idk what’s stopping her from sleeping#she won’t even lie down unless i’m sitting next to her. she just sits there staring out the window#her pupils are also taking up her entire eyes and have been all day#that’ll be a side effect of the medication and maybe the lack of sleep? but it won’t be making her feel any better#she can probably barely see at this point#like imagine you’ve been awake for 2 days after surgery and you’re in a lot of pain and haven’t eaten since before surgery#and are also on strong painkillers. and you also have no idea what’s wrong with you or why everyone’s doing things that hurt you#bruh your brain would be COOKED. there’s no way she has any idea what’s going on rn but she’s clearly feeling terrible#personal#like i think she’ll be ok in the long-term but she’s gotta somehow get through all these immediate issues#last time something like this happened she stopped drinking and never started again#not eating or sleeping don’t have workarounds as simple as putting water in her food#it really doesn’t help that there’s so much other shit going on rn#i’m doing a whole bunch of stuff with my phone and computer that’s taking a lot of work#but also my sister’s going on a long overseas trip that she’s leaving for tomorrow#so the combo of dad and sister coming and going constantly and also like 6 random deliveries for tech stuff in the last 2 days—#has the dogs really wound up. so georgie’s been howling at absolutely everything#and it’s rainy so my clothes aren’t trying and they’re hanging on a rack hooked on the hallway door so the door can’t close#which puts one less door between my room and the dogs so they’re waking me up every time anything happens#and i sleep during the day so that’s ALL THE TIME. i’ve had like 8 hrs of sleep between the last two afternoons#my sister always has so much random life stuff she wants to talk about and was getting really annoyed that i wasn’t very receptive#like ‘im about to go away for 3 months’ sorry i know its a big thing but i can’t just reschedule peach’s medical emergency
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I can’t even imagine living without anxiety. Like. How. What?
#I mean if I woke up tomorrow with a normal amount of anxiety it would be a shocking difference to my daily life. and I am medicated!!! like.#what? am I missing something here?#my mom tells me that meds can only do so much and that they’re really just meant to make it so you can get out of bed every day#but now I’m wondering like is that true or is that my mom is on the wrong dose herself and something could be done to help us both#gahhhhh idk I just feel helpless bc I’m scared of making big changes and the big changes have to make are scary and large and I need a#bulleted list made of things I can do (and break down into very small steps) to actually progress in a positive way in my life instead of#being SO afraid and SO stagnant. it’s been six months since (ptsd diagnosis causing thing) and I don’t feel like I’ve made any progress even#with a therapist. I’m working towards a more intensive program but I feel like it’s almost making me feel more alienated bc I’d have to like#go be surrounded by other mentally ill people and medical people which brings dad dying trauma and like I know I’m running from it bc I’m#afraid to face the changes I need to make and the feelings that are going to come up but fuck man can’t I get some fucking meds that make#this easier to deal with!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! grief and ptsd and long term isolation and anxiety and chronic pain like fuck it’s#so exhausting!!!! I feel like I’m fucking fighting thru life and then from the outside it’s like I’m doing nothing cause I stay in my room#and get stoned and play animal crossing and watch tv and cry and over eat and sometimes I drive around in circles so I can scream sing until#my throat burns and I get a headache and everything finally quiets down in my head for a second. I know I look like I’m doing nothing and#that’s because I am doing nothing but waiting for the next time a mental health professional will talk to me for an hour like it’s so sad#anyways. you ever take a big dab and then start crying and type all of this like it’s an epiphany even tho it’s things you already know.#honestly crying in front of the air conditioner is so slay slight breeze over my face cooling the tears the white noise calming me down
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tagged by ko @tofumilanesa for wip wednesday! big shout out to writevember for making me feel like i can actually call any of these works in progress… your guide to my emoji code under the cut
wip!
🪻🐈⬛ - the doc title is still just. YOWLING but i am like 7/8 of the way done with omega yamo fic and hopefully salem isn’t reading this so i can just drop it over a year later with no warning <3
🫃2️⃣ - DEWEY^2 P2!!!! she is almost done (i am lying) but she is so close i can almost taste it. sorry to my pwp that grew its own feelings baby
😇🤭 (🕒 -> 🕜) - rip i’m not telling you about this one until it’s posted but it IS complete aside from being ao3 formatted and the eight billion edits i inevitably do right before full-sending it
☁️💧 - cloud petey fic, which exists mostly as an embarrassingly large tag on a different blog and is condensing into a narrative about as well as water at 30° N/S. the time loop fic also falls under this description
eternally in progress (short list)
🌑🐕 - tyler borzoituzzi exists… there is an index of scenes/plot points… it plays like a movie in my head…
💯❕- fantastic! ‘verse
👁️👻 - stevie brandon seeing ghosts au, which has eight different (now nine i guess but you haven't seen the mustache adam post yet) plots. sorry
just. rotating like a microwave
🍎 - because they didn’t have a pomegranate emoji, this is what i used for the fic that feels like it should be a 50k connor bedard character study hanif abdurraqib/cathal kelly thesis about legends and mythmaking in sports and eating your young. yes i know pomegranates aren’t actually pomes and apples are but it’s fine
🦈 - the one cat da fuck they doing over there meme but about the sharks just like. in general. more on this at five
tagging @colap1nto, @songsandswords, @whitenikes, @gordiemeow, @acheronist, and anybody else who wants to share!!
#i regret to inform the public (beloved mutuals who read my tags) that we have hit the doldrums re: creativity.#got SO excited because i had no prep for tomorrow and got out unreasonably early and proceeded to do nothing 🤩 zero motivation/inspiration#anyway. being a big baby. have looked at dewey^2 for too long and now hate it which makes me sad because i was on SUCH a roll solving plot#and really i just need to pick something else from my (looks at smudged hand) 10000 other documents but none of them are calling my nameeee#maybe i’ll ao3 format 🕒 -> 🕜 or maybe i’ll read wandering stars (did finish a book this morning) and then hope something strikes me#preferably very aggressively like with the force of a train? OHHHHHH YOU GUYS MAYBE I COULD MAKE SOMETHING FOR HOLY JUMPING MACKEREL FEST#because you know what DID hit me upside the head like a 2x world champ coming from behind with the steel chair WAS BERGY & JOE GUESS WHO#joey first of all did not deserve to lose those games and second of all i am SO immensely delighted i don’t know if it’s on here yet i am#so sure at least one of my beloved drw moots (beth and nik are likely culprits but all of u would) has it on here yet BUT THERE’S SO MUCH#BERGY VERY BLATANTLY CALLING JOE A NERD BC HE KNOWS ALL ABT HIS TEAMMATES &LOVES THEM!! BERGY NOT KNOWING A SINGLE FUCKIN THING ABT ANYONE!#the absolute unsurprised yet still heartbroken disbelief & disappointment of joe saying ‘he uses black tape!’ oh that’s rent-free forever#anyway.#liv in the replies#p.s. it's fic friday now don't worry about how late i am#as always ask away ask about anything in post tags y'all know i love to yap u are always welcome in the inbox or dms#i was trying to be slightly less mysterious about all of these but i am a secret-keeper sorry and also you need to live inside my brain#in order to understand half of what i'm referencing sometimes. sorry.#also there are some un-hockey fic projects i want to do but i have. so little time in my life for anything sometimes that we will make do
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next episode on my watch list is 'rules of engagement' but honestly i might skip and come back to it cause i do not have the energy for the julie rant im gonna wanna have if i watch it right now.....
#puppy noises#micks big ben 10 rewatch liveblog#or maybe ill just take a break from watching and come back tomorrow or something idk
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youtube
IT'S FINALLY HAPPENING GUYS
#i think this my favorite txt logo ever#it's so freaking pretty#and the morse code at the end...#the crown vibes...#something BIG is coming#txt#tomorrow x together#choi yeonjun#choi soobin#choi beomgyu#kang taehyun#huening kai#yeonjun#soobin#beomgyu#taehyun#hueningkai#투모로우바이투게더#minisode 3: tomorrow#kpop#Youtube
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#personal#it feels like im not allowed to complain about my own life on my own blog#or at least that if im allowed to that it seems very firstworld problem very selfish very not appropriate with all thats going on#that people will and do think less of me for expressing my own sadness and frustrations because theres no way it compares#to a lot of peoples very big and very real problems#but im so fucking sick of being poor and small. all ive had to eat today is 2min noodles roughly 10 hours ago#and all ill get tomorrow is a bowl of 2min noodles but ittl be another 15 or so hours until its the most reasonable to eat that#thats the real girlmath and then thats the last of my noodles. that leaves me with one (1) small tin of tuna#which might end up being tonights intermediary food if i really cant wait 15 nore hours for my next noodles but is supposed to be#the one meal of the day after tomorrow. so if i eat it too soon then i have even more time that i just dont fucking eat#im so sick to death of being in this position. like its literally killing me and theres fuck all i can do to make it better#ive tried. and i try and i try and i try but i can never afford anything#my landagent keeps sending me textx asking when theyll see a patment for my $50 water bill#i have to stop myself from texting back every time. youll see payment when im not spending literally 75% of my pay on rent alone#when i can afford to buy food and bills at the same time. whn i dont feel like kms-ing would be better than paying you my rent every frtnite#i crave a burger so bad i cant make myself do any tasks. i cant start or continue any crafts or chores because all im thinking about#is a burger like a blorbo rotating in my mind alongside the background noise that i wont get a burger and will only get noodles but not for#hours. a whole days worth of hours almost#my shitawful roomate is back and i have to play nice but he gives me the same feelings my abusive mother did. im scared to leave my room#in the safeplace house ive spent the last two years building for myself. this feels awful. things were all going so right and now#all of a sudden theyre all going as wrong as possible and im struggling so much. with no one to help. no one cares enough to help#the few people i do have are wrapped up in their own lives. which i get. but it doesnt take away the hurt of dealing with it all alone again#lot of momma trauma coming up with the end of eclipse season and i thought i was handling it. now i just feel fucking awful all the time#like ik healing isnt linear but the roomate triggers so hard things i thought i had processed and was on top of#would a burger fix that? no but itd atleast give me something to emotionally lean on for strength though it. but all ive got is noodles#24 hour apart one meal per day noodles. and tomorrow is my last pack. my only solace lately is that ive been invited to my first ever rave#or my first real rave anyway ive only been to one other 'edm event' that was not really a rave of any scale it was like 25 people#but its a halloween rave so im hoping for spooky fun dancetimes at least theres that. im out of data and spotifyprem so i havent been able#to take my silly little mental health walks bc theres zero chance im doing that without music and so itll be noce to get outside fr the rave#anyway. im doing very poorly i appreciate you few who reached out while i wasnt active but i expect ill continue to do poorly for some time
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Whatever the fuck kinda fuck ass hormones are happening in my body right now I'm mad at them. pmsing pre-period-ing whatever you wanna call it and I'm so mad. So grumpy. And I can't help it! But I'm aware that I shouldn't dump that on people so that means that I'm mostly just silent or making noises to myself. Also mad for other reasons but last week I was able to handle it somehow. Premenstrual me struggles to handle it much more tho
#also my knee hurts. that's a classic tho. my back hurts and my neck to the point that i cant read a book. or i can but its very painful#also im annoyed because if it my mom does get diagnosed with celiac then maybe i will too and i love gluten. maybe she won't tho but if she#will.....been thinking about diet and the fact that i really am fucked up when it comes to that because i 1 have food issues that are like#ocd sensory related 2 have disordered type thoughts will not get into that 3 don't eat meat hate it with every fiber of my being 4 if we ad#gluten to that...oof. im also a person who will bring a snack to the function i try to have something in my bag always because sometimes#there's just nothing for me and i do try to eat to be polite sometimes but sometimes when i do i literally gag. anyway i hate eating but i#also love eating#and also i have pimples i very rarely have pimples so thats a big deal for me and i actually don't care how they look its the fact that im#going to have to put on a band aid or something cause i keep picking at them#and i have another itchy thing under my eyes that comes out when i go too long without using these eye patches things but i bought a 60 pcs#pack and it turns out that the big pack is fake as shir because they're completely different different texture and so thin that they just#slide from under my eyes to my goddamn chin#also my grandmoms fridge got fucked up and i have to go over tomorrow to clean all that up how the FUCK will i transport a new one idk girl#my tiny car is too tiny to transport a regular fridge#so yes i am annoyed AND annoying. whateverrrr
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it's 2023 and drm is asserting boundaries against nsfw and truthing/shipping. how did we get here from 2020
#overall im glad the video was made. i still have a doubt on one thing#i wish his account where he posts actual stuff wasnt private i cant find this one tweet im looking for bc it was someone else's screenshot#and idk where they went so i have no way of confirming this tweet augh#but regardless. there are other things i wish he had addressed. but i guess they werent serious enough for this video#but then again he addressed a few things that were trivial in the scope of the topic lol#so idk :/ there were a few things i thought he wouldnt bring up that he actually did tho#was nice to have clarification on those#still not a big fan of his im just glad to hear that at least some of those things werent true#still need to come to my own conclusion on one thing i need to find something first tho#again. i'd rather him just be someone i dont like than to be someone who hurts other people#chat#i need to go to bed but i wanna dig around so bad...#but i work tomorrow i should like. be productive KJGHF
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I will make any sort of sacrifice for art
#day three of unrelenting headache (from too much screentime presumably)#so i'm kind of very dying but there's no way that will stop me from finishing all 30 drawings#especially since knowing me i otherwise would have spent that time scrolling social media anyways#so at least i can get something tangible and fun and something to be proud of out of this#trying to do 2 drawings a day now so that i can have it all finished a bit early and it's in fact a comittment but i somehow AM managing#this might not seem like a big deal but this is coming from someone who hasn't made a single full piece of drawing in many years#so to be able to sit down and finish something EVERY day... would have been a completely absurd thought just a couple months ago#when i'm done with all the drawings i want to put them together and print them and display them somewhere#afterwards i will also either: draw much more bcs practice and it becomes easier#OR be so fed up with it that i never draw again. ofc hoping for the first option#going to bed now and hoping that i don't pass out tomorrow#goosepost
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