#something about the person who recommended it
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It sounds like OP already knows about the treasure trove of information still at our fingertips but for anyone who's looking for places to talk about ANYTHING — chickens, bodybuilding, roleplaying, computers — here's a list of a bunch of forums that are still alive and well. I personally really like the world literature forum.
https://aftermath.site/best-active-forums-internet-today
Also I recommend installing ublock origin if you only have 5 seconds, and if you've got about an hour, try switching to Linux. Ubuntu is beginner friendly!
Finally, OP mentioned neocities and I recommend looking at people's "links" pages on their neocities because they can take you to some really interesting, "old web" kind of sites. To find people's neocities try something like search.marginalia.nu.
I don't know I'm not done talking about it. It's insane that I can't just uninstall Edge or Copilot. That websites require my phone number to sign up. That people share their contacts to find their friends on social media.
I wouldn't use an adblocker if ads were just banners on the side funding a website I enjoy using and want to support. Ads pop up invasively and fill my whole screen, I misclick and get warped away to another page just for trying to read an article or get a recipe.
Every app shouldn't be like every other app. Instagram didn't need reels and a shop. TikTok doesn't need a store. Instagram doesn't need to be connected to Facebook. I don't want my apps to do everything, I want a hub for a specific thing, and I'll go to that place accordingly.
I love discord, but so much information gets lost to it. I don't want to join to view things. I want to lurk on forums. I want to be a user who can log in and join a conversation by replying to a thread, even if that conversation was two days ago. I know discord has threads, it's not the same. I don't want to have to verify my account with a phone number. I understand safety and digital concerns, but I'm concerned about information like that with leaks everywhere, even with password managers.
I shouldn't have to pay subscriptions to use services and get locked out of old versions. My old disk copy of photoshop should work. I should want to upgrade eventually because I like photoshop and supporting the business. Adobe is a whole other can of worms here.
Streaming is so splintered across everything. Shows release so fast. Things don't get physical releases. I can't stream a movie I own digitally to friends because the share-screen blocks it, even though I own two digital copies, even though I own a physical copy.
I have an iPod, and I had to install a third party OS to easily put my music on it without having to tangle with iTunes. Spotify bricked hardware I purchased because they were unwillingly to upkeep it. They don't pay their artists. iTunes isn't even iTunes anymore and Apple struggles to upkeep it.
My TV shows me ads on the home screen. My dad lost access to eBook he purchased because they were digital and got revoked by the company distributing them. Hitman 1-3 only runs online most of the time. Flash died and is staying alive because people love it and made efforts to keep it up.
I have to click "not now" and can't click "no". I don't just get emails, they want to text me to purchase things online too. My windows start search bar searches online, not just my computer. Everything is blindly called an app now. Everything wants me to upload to the cloud. These are good tools! But why am I forced to use them! Why am I not allowed to own or control them?
No more!!!!! I love my iPod with so much storage and FLAC files. I love having all my fics on my harddrive. I love having USBs and backups. I love running scripts to gut suck stuff out of my Windows computer I don't want that spies on me. I love having forums. I love sending letters. I love neocities and webpages and webrings. I will not be scanning QR codes. Please hand me a physical menu. If I didn't need a smartphone for work I'd get a "dumb" phone so fast. I want things to have buttons. I want to use a mouse. I want replaceable batteries. I want the right to repair. I grew up online and I won't forget how it was!
#i can talk about this forever so send me asks if you're interested in learning moreee#I'm a computer science major i live for this shit#also sorry for kinda hijacking your post op. i agree with everything you said i just wanted to#provide resources for people who maybe don't know what to do about it#tech stuff
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Hello I was wondering if you could do Jackson ellie x bestfreind reader and like they have had a crush on eachother for a while and have a sleepover where they smoke or drink maybe or play some type of game like truth or dare and find out they like eachother and get kinda freaky idk. Thank you!
EEE I am so excited for this one watch me cook on this request. This is a rlly good request and I wanna write something just as good!! Also I want to recommend you an ao3 fic with this EXACT plot it's tagged here actually my favorite Ellie fic ever.
Content: 4k words, bestfriend reader, Jackson setting, pent-up feelings, nipple-play (r! receiving), fingering (r! receiving), tribbing, Ellie puts a finger into your mouth how fun!, a lot of dialogue before the actual sex sorry but I loved writing Ellie to be funny, reader likes pink a lot (couldn't help myself) and is afab, reader and Ellie 18+, NOT PROOFREAD LMAO
You're far from safe from liking people you shouldn't like.
That doesn't even cover the multitude of feelings! Like doesn't cover it. You're pretty sure you love Ellie.
Maybe in another lifetime, you and Ellie could've met and went on a date. You could've loved her freely. In this universe, she is your childhood best friend.
You know it could ruin the best thing that has ever happened to you if you tell her, or if she finds out in some way, but fuck; when she looks at you, it's like you forget how to breathe. You just wanna breathe her in, you want to share the same air and feel her lips on yours.
Ellie is unlike anyone you've ever known. She's sweet for you. She's impulsive to others, and honestly sometimes an asshole. That only makes you fall more and more in love for her. You didn't know it was possible to be attracted to someone's flaws, but you want every piece of her, even the bits that others in Jackson label as "annoying."
Ellie has always been there for you since you were just 15 and she moved to Jackson right by Joel's side. You just seemed to click. She was brash, foul-mouthed, and told ironically funny dad jokes. You were the type of person who liked having adventures and never shut up. Ellie always listened. She held you while you cried, let you borrow her book of puns, and volunteered to do patrols with you just so she could have fun adventures with you.
You couldn't ruin a good thing. You don't know what you would even do without Ellie in your life. You didn't wanna freak her out or make things weird. You feel like such a coward, but even thinking about Ellie distancing herself from you because of your stupid crush on her? It just makes your stomach churn with dread.
Little did you know Ellie was equally obsessed with you.
You're like a fucking ball of sunshine to the girl, always there laughing at the stupid things she says, defending her when she gets in trouble for something minor, and your smile should be considered warfare for how easily it could kill her. She tries to keep her feelings to herself, but it is so hard to when you look at her with bright eyes and the sweetest smile like you're trying to give her a toothache.
It's a recipe for a bomb, and it only takes one game to set it off.
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You're sitting criss-cross on your bed and Ellie is in your floor. It's a Saturday, which means both of you get to have a sleepover. No patrol, and no major chores to be done around Jackson.
Ellie just got back from a multiple day lasting patrol and she missed you so much while she was gone, it's not even funny. Seattle is beautiful, but boring when there isn't a sunshine girl in awe about how the verdure clings to the buildings. But at least now she is here, back in your bedroom which she loves so much.
Ellie's room is vastly different from yours. Well, her garage is. Her bedsheets are grey and minimalistic, and her make-shift kitchen is lined with posters. Her favorite is the one with the punk green-haired man holding a guitar. Her closet, however, it quite impressive. Her shelves are lined with comics and space movies, and her hangers are lined with flannels, of course.
Your bedroom, in contrast, has white bedsheets and a cozy pink blanket. You have a few raggedy plushies from scavenging around and your shelves are filled with lighter-colored clothing. White curtains decorate your windows and frilly pillowcases (that end up in the floor most of the time) compliment your bed. You have a full-length mirror in the corner of your room and a shelf of DVDs you usually just bring over to Ellie's garage, since she has a much nicer tv than you do. Ellie glances up at you from the floor, squiggling her eyebrows.
"I'm so fucking bored!" You groan, making Ellie laugh in the process.
"And how is that my problem?"
You flip her off and she clutches her stomach.
"Seriously, Ellie. I wanna actually do something and not just eat grilled cheeses and read your nerdy comics."
She scoffs.
"Excuse me? It's not my fault you have bad taste in literature."
You snort at that. "Starlight Savage and Raven Mouse are not literature."
"Oh, then what are they, huh?" She stands up, amusingly offended.
"Comics!"
Ellie grabs one of your pillows and pretends to suffocate you with it. You're laughing and trying to pry it off of your face.
"Hey, quit! You're actually gonna kill me!" You giggle, your voice muffled from the cushioning.
Ellie finally relents, laughing along with you.
"Better think twice before disrespecting Starlight Savage." She is wearing her signature shit-eating grin.
"Oh, whatever.. Hey!- You got me off topic." You groaned.
Ellie laughs at that. "And what was the topic?"
"I am bored out of my fucking mind," you complain, your voice rising in pitch to sound whiny, which she pretends to absolutely hate.
Really, she just hates that it makes her stomach clench when she hears your cute complains, and the tone of your whines only makes it worse.
"Okay, okay, fine. We can do something fun." She feigns reluctance, setting down on the bed beside you.
"Great!! So, what should we do?"
"Seriously? You don't even know what you wanna do and you gave me whiplash bitching about being bored?"
You scoff, jumping to your own defense. "I was tryin' to get you to come up with something," and then you add to complete your argument, "I wouldn't be bored if I knew what we could do."
Ellie sighs, and you smile because you know that means she has had enough of your bullshit and she just wants to throw in the towel.
"Fine. Well, we can play a game perhaps?"
You groan in protest at the suggestion. "You're a dirty cheater when it comes to Monopoly!"
Ellie only lets out a sheepish laugh at that, because she knows that you're being 100% truthful. "That is what makes the game fun!" When she sees your glare, she sighs once more. "Fine. How 'bout Truth or Dare?"
That sounds intriguing; the game begins.
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You and Ellie sit across from each other, and the game has been going on for around 10 minutes now. It's getting quite boring - always questions like "What's a secret you haven't told me?" or Ellie dares you to do something she knows you won't do, like lick the toilet bowl.
Then, she asks a question that brings the game onto another level.
"What's your favorite sex position?"
You stare at her, your jaw practically in your lap. You don't wanna talk sex positions with the girl you secretly wanna do sex positions with.
"What the fuck, Ellie?!"
She looks a bit guilty, but shrugs with a smirk that doesn't go unnoticed.
"What? I wanted to spice things up. C'mon, don't be a pussy."
You think it over, but finally, with a heated face, you say fuck it and give into her bullshit. "Missionary."
Ellie bursts out laughing.
You're sitting there not knowing what to do! She is laughing like a hyena at this point, tears in the corners of her eyes. She slaps her knee. What the fuck?!
"What's so funny?!"
Ellie just laughs, falling over and she is snorting like a pig now before she finally settles down. "It's just.." she tries to stifle a giggle, "that is the most boring thing you could've possibly said.”
You know that, but you're keen on defending your word. Ellie loves that about you, how you're always quick to stand up for yourself. "It's romantic!"
"Okay, okay," she shrugs. "Enlighten me on how missionary is more romantic than any other position that actually feels good."
You don't hesitate to list off the facts. "First of all, it does feel good! You just haven't tried the pillow method. Second of all, you can kiss your partner and actually talk to them." You sigh, getting a bit flustered (and turned on) by the conversation at hand. "Imagine fucking someone and getting to kiss all over their face while doing so, or on their neck or their tits. It's about the intimacy."
Ellie looks just as flustered as you now. She is silent for a moment before giving you the benefit of the doubt. "Okay, I guess you can rest your case now. But there is much more intimate positions than missionary, you know. You're just thinking vanilla ones like riding the strap-on, or from behind."
You raise an eyebrow at that. "Okay, I'll bite. What's more intimate than looking into someone's eyes while they cum?"
Ellie laughs at your vulgar question, pink tinting her freckled cheeks. "Tribbing." Her voice is more quiet, and that only makes you more aware of the slight tension.
You quickly brush it off with a laugh.
"Of course your gay ass would say that."
She grins and sits up at that, quick to defend herself. "Hey, you have no room to be talking, little miss 'my gay awakening is Rose from Titanic.'"
Your jaw drops and you look at her like she has said something crazy. "Hey, Rose is hot!"
She giggles. "Yeah, Sherlock, thanks for pointing out the obvious."
You roll your eyes. "Okay, okay. Can we get back to the game?"
She nods, and it continues.
As time passes, the questions grow more and more...uncomfortable to answer. You're still asking her the more casual things, but Ellie is daring you to do stupid, impossible stuff, or to answer questions like "what was your first time like?", "do you have a friends with benefits situation with anyone in Jackson?", and "if you could kiss anyone in Jackson, who would it be?" (which you brushed off jokingly by saying old man Eugene. She didn't press any further, only mocking you).
Then, she leans forward after you choose truth, and she whispers something you can't really brush off.
"Who do you like?"
You're fucked. If she asked "do you like someone?", you could answer without revealing who it is. She knows she has you trapped. Sneaky cunt.
You don't answer right away. Ellie is so close, your knees touching. The air in the room is insanely hot, and you want to leave your own house, you want to hide under your blankets or cover your face, but you can't.
Ellie doesn't wait for you to answer.
"I know you like someone, I can tell when my best friend is in love. Who is it?"
"That's way too personal, I.."
She scoffs, but it's not a rude sound. Just shocked, maybe slightly hurt. "You have always told me your crushes. Why won't you tell me now?"
You feel guilty now because she doesn't understand. She doesn't get why you won't tell her. She can't understand that it's because you like her. You want to scream it: I'm in love with you, Ellie! But those words won't be the next you utter.
"I just...I feel like this time it should be private." You know that your reasoning is weak, for once in your life, the defense is slipping and it's ugly. You internally wince.
She just stares in silence, not really meeting your eyes. It makes you panic, and then, then the words slip from your mouth seeing the hurt on Ellie's pretty face.
"It's you."
She stares at you like she didn't quite hear what you said, even though it was shaky, nevertheless loud and coherent.
"What...?"
"I..I'm in love with you, Ellie." You repeat yourself.
She leans into you. "Fuck.." Her breath hitches. "You better not be fucking around with me, I swear to-"
"No!", you shout loudly and quickly try to compose yourself. "I mean..I'm not joking. I like you. I hope this doesn't fuck with our friendship, or like.." You trail off, not wanting to think about what could happen now.
"I'm in love with you, too." There, now Ellie has gotten it out too.
Ellie didn't even fully understand why she asked you that. She knew she could've gotten her feelings hurt, that you could've liked someone else or that it would definitely mean you did like her, and then she had to be vulnerable and confess it back. Still, she was so exhausted, so fucking tired of pretending like hugs and casual touches were enough. They were never enough.
"Can I kiss you?" She doesn't even give you the proper time to react to her shared confession before she springs that onto you. You don't complain, only nodding quickly.
Her breath is warm against yours, and you can tell how shaky it is. You've never seen her so nervous, it makes your own stomach flutter with butterflies. Then, Ellie's grasping onto your face and smashing her lips against yours. Her mouth is warm, and the kiss doesn't even start out gentle. It's all devouring, all need and passon.
You quickly move into her lap, thighs on either sides of hers, and both of you are desperately pulling each other closer, finally sharing the same air. She tastes like everything natural, something so unique it can't be described but you immediately know you need more of it. Her tongue moves inside of your mouth, devouring you just like how she has been dreaming of for who knows how long, and when you're forced to pull away for a breath, her lips are sloppily trailing down your jaw to your throat, her hands grasping your hips to pull you closer.
"I've wanted you for so long, you know that?" Her voice is warm against your sensitive skin, and you think you could just burst with how it feels to be practically intertwined with her.
"Show me how it feels, Els.." You gasp and tilt your head back for more, but Ellie pulls away to look at you.
"How what feels?' She doesn't sound rude, only confused with her lips swollen and wet.
"The intimacy..the intimacy you talked about.." Oh, that.
She nods quickly, and her mouth is all over your shoulders, leaving soft pecks between words, "We can do that, but I wanna do something first..is that okay?"
"Yeah, go ahead."
With that, she pulls your shirt over your head and stares at you like she has never seen a pair of boobs before. Her eyes are wide and she takes you in before her.
"You're so pretty," she mumbles with conviction, kneading your tits through your bra. You can only moan when she sticks a hand into your bra and rubs her palm over your nipples, her other hand deftly undoing the clasp of the fabric.
That was the hottest thing you could do for a woman, Williams..
Her lips quickly find a nipple, pulling it into her mouth to swirl her tongue around the bud. Your fingers tug at her hair, begging for more. You need her closer. She reluctantly pulls her mouth off off of its new favorite place and leans back up to face you, planting an affectionate kiss on your cheek before smiling sheepishly.
"I'm gonna say something I want to do to you, but you can't laugh.."
That makes you already giggle, despite the heat building between your thighs. That is something you love about Ellie, the way she can make you laugh even when you aren't supposed to be.
"I'll try my best. What is it?" You ask, and she fiddles with her fingers nervously.
"I wanna use my fingers on you," she says it so quietly, voice nervous but filled with hunger before she quickly adds, "if you want me to. It's okay if you don't wanna go any further-"
"I want you to finger me, Els."
That was easier than she thought it would be.
She nods now, slowly unbuttoning your jeans and watching with an intense gaze as you hop off of her lap to shimmy them off. Now you're in nothing but a cotton pair of panties and you look so gorgeous.
Ellie has always found you to be beautiful. During patrols and on lookout, your hair had a shine to it that most people wouldn't care to think too much about, but Ellie always noticed it. Ellie always noticed the way your lips parted when you were zoned out, or how you walked like you always knew where you were going even on the paths that were mainly uncharted. You were so lovely-looking.
Now, nearly naked for her, she doesn't know if she can bare to blink even for a second. She is currently having a never-ending starting contest with your body, and she has to stop herself from pouncing on you. She wants to love you, not just fuck you.
Ellie is on her knees between your legs, hooking her fingers into the waistband of your underwear. Her eyes flicker over your body before looking to yours for confirmation.
"You sure you want this?"
"Please, Ellie. I want you." You know you sound desperate for her, but it can't be helped. You were soaked through your underwear, clit beating with need, and Ellie is just eyeing you like she wanted to devour you. She probably would, but she wants to save your clit for later.
She nods and slips your underwear down your legs, pulling them off of your ankles and throwing them behind her. The action made you giggle, but Ellie quickly squashed your outburst.
"Somethin' funny?" She asks, slipping a finger through your slick folds. You gasp and jolt.
"Hey, where the fuck is the warning, you cunt?"
She has to stifle her own laugh at your outburst, but she is growing tired of the cute giggles; if you laughed one more time, she'd be fucking you until you were limping-
"Sorry, pretty. I'm gettin' impatient." Her tone mkes you involuntarily clench. You rarely hear that tone, the serious one when she is either around someone she doesn't know and is keeping it professional or just not in the mood to joke. Now, you discover it's her horny tone, too.
You nod, tilting your head back to rest it on your frilly pillow. Finally, she slips two digits past your lips and you resist the urge to let a whorish whine slip past your lips. When she easily slides into your heat, you then can't resist.
Ellie's eyes are glued to your pussy like it's magic, watching your hips try to rise for more, feeling the way your walls tighten around her intrusion.
It's too much for her poor, fucked head to bare.
She is already as wrecked as you are. She wants to taunt you for the way you already look like you're going to cum from her barely brushing at your spongey g-spot, but she can't. She is probably in rougher shape right now.
"You feel so warm." It's all she can manage to get out, and she curls her fingers inside of you into upward, making you moan.
"I wanna cum, Els..please, more. Give me more." Ellie has never seen you this dumb for pleasure before, but who is she to deny you?
Her fingers aren't thrusting in and out or finger-banging you, just slowly sliding through your cunt, her fingertips stroking where you need them to. You feel so full, so complete. You hope she does this every single day from here on out.
It doesn't take long to get you into a state of complete bliss, and you haven't even climaxed yet. Your legs aren't clamping down, rather spreading wider as if you're begging for her to take you in the most obscene ways possible, fill you up with more than just her fingers. If only she you two were currently at her house, she has that unopened strap-on box... maybe for another day.
The knot that builds in your stomach, the temperature of it overheating your insides is about to snap. You're begging as if Ellie is teasing you or something. You're whining, and you look like you're about to start sobbing if she pauses her pace even for a nanosecond. She just wants to gives you everything, thinks you deserve the whole world, so she leans forward and intertwines her fingers with yours as her other fingers pump deep inside you, and you swear it's rearranging your guts. You wanna be wrecked so damn badly.
"You keep fluttering around me, gonna cum?" She asks, and you whine and nod.
Your orgasm soon hits you like a tsunami, once in a crash and then it simmers throughout you in waves. This is probably the hardest you have ever came. You gasp onto her hand tight, squeezing her fingers. You can't even speak or you'd be howling her name. It feels so euphoric and you wonder how it can get any better than this.
When you come down from the peak, she eases her fingers out of your tender insides and licks her ring finger clean. Then, she settles her hips between your legs, bringing her soaking middle finger to your lips.
"Open up."
You do so without question, tasting yourself on her digit before she swiftly pulls her finger away with a "pop!"
"I taste weird," you mumble and she rolls her eyes, mumbling a little "fuck you" before sitting up to strip out of her flannel.
You feel maybe a little nervous before. Something about the thought of feeling her in such an intimate way makes you feel even more fluttery inside. You've been with women before, you are far from a virgin, but you've never clashed clits before (omfg what). Most girls thought it was just a porn thing.
"You okay?" Ellie pauses, her flannel on the bed and a black t-shirt layer underneath it.
"Yeah," you mean it, "just a little nervous."
Her eyes soften, and she takes your hand and squeezes it. "I promise I'll be slow with you. I'm not gonna rush you into this, and if you want, we can always stop."
You feel more assured now, and you smile. "Okay."
When she finally strips out of her clothing, you take her in. She is breath-takingly beautiful. Her body is pale but covered in tan freckles, and her nipples are perky with arousal. Her shoulders and collarbone look so fucking kissable. You're still in a daze as she hooks a leg over yours, her warm cunt only an inch or two away from yours. She hovers.
"You ready?"
"I want you, so yes."
That makes her smile, and she slowly eases down onto you, her folds rubbing up against yours and both of your neglected clits finally getting the attention they deserve. Both of you are already moaning and Ellie leans down onto you, her tits brushing against yours as she kisses you deeply.
This kiss is slower than the first, less desperate but just as emotional. It's hungry and consumes you in a sensual way. Her hips grind against yours, her slick mixing with your soaked pussy to make you only whine into her mouth.
Now you understand how intimate this is. You feel so connected to Ellie in a way you hope you never get to feel with anyone else. You wanna always be this close. You think that even after this ends, you'll feel that tie to her body and heart, always leading you back to her.
When you both cum together, it's much different than what she gave you before. You can feel her tense up with you, hear her shaky breaths and moans, and you feel a warmth inside of you reminding you that she feels this way because of your pussy, because of her feelings for you. It's making you obsessive to feel this way.
When the high fades, she collapses on top you. You're both breathing heavily for a few minutes. Her breath is against your neck and it feels like a kiss. Your brain is thinking of something stupid now that the horniness is over.
"Isn't it obvious that I'm your girlfriend now?"
Ellie laughs and squeezes you tightly.
"Yeah. You're my girlfriend now, and I'm not letting you go."
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#tlou2#ellie tlou#ellie williams#ellie the last of us#ellie x fem reader#ellie x reader#ellie smut#the last of us part 2#cheyisagirlkissermailbox#requests
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haii can i req octotrio, malleus, and leona (all seperate!) with a reader like kokomi from genshin thats also a jellyfish? romantic or not it doesn’t matter to me ^_^ also feel free to add more characters the more the merrier :3
Leona, Octatrio, Malleus, Riddle, Vil, Rook, Rollo x Kokomi! Jellyfish! Reader
a/n; i felt pretty inspired so i added quite a few <3
Leona Kingscholar
Leona pretends he’s indifferent, but your serene and calculated demeanor throws him off.
The first time he sees your glowing form under the moonlight, he blinks twice, convinced he’s hallucinating. “Tch, what’s with the light show? Trying to blind me or something?” But secretly, he’s mesmerized.
Your habit of calmly handling disputes in the dorm (often between Ruggie and others) frustrates him. “You can’t just talk people into behaving,” he grumbles, only to watch you succeed every time.
Leona’s competitive side comes out when he learns about your strategic mind. Chess games with you become a weekly ritual, and losing to you annoys him more than he’ll admit.
Despite his gruffness, he’s deeply protective of you, especially when someone comments on your jellyfish-like features. “Say that again, and I’ll show you why you don’t mess with jellyfish.”
Sometimes, he watches you float gracefully in water, pretending he’s there for a nap. “Stop staring at me, Leona.” “Who’s staring? I’m just resting my eyes.”
Azul Ashengrotto
Azul is immediately intrigued by your jellyfish traits and calm demeanor—after all, you’re a marine creature, and that’s his territory.
Your bioluminescence is something he secretly envies, though he’ll never admit it. “A marvelous ability,” he says while scribbling notes for future contracts.
Your strategic thinking makes you one of the few people who can keep up with him in negotiations. He offers you a job at the Lounge almost immediately, “to better utilize your talents.”
Whenever Floyd or Jade annoys him, Azul uses you as a buffer. “Perhaps you could… calm them down?” And, to his astonishment, it works. Even Floyd listens to you.
He’s absolutely fascinated by your glowing hair and jellyfish-like appendages. “Do they serve a specific function, or are they purely aesthetic?” he asks while trying not to sound overly eager.
Azul secretly finds your tranquil nature soothing. After a long day of scheming, he’ll seek your company under the guise of “strategic discussions,” but really, he just wants to hear your voice.
Jade Leech
Jade is utterly fascinated by you from the moment he meets you. Your resemblance to a jellyfish sparks his curiosity.
He constantly asks you questions about your biology, glowing abilities, and lifestyle. “Do you use your bioluminescence to lure prey, or is it purely decorative?”
Jade enjoys teasing you, especially when you’re peacefully floating in water. “You look so serene. It’s almost a shame to disturb you.” Then he splashes you.
He respects your calm and collected demeanor, but he’s determined to find out what flusters you. Watching your serene mask slip is his new favorite pastime.
If someone dares insult you, Jade’s smile grows even sharper. “I wouldn’t recommend making an enemy of a jellyfish, you know. They’re far more dangerous than they appear.”
He enjoys your company during his hikes, fascinated by how your glowing presence adds an ethereal beauty to the forest.
Floyd Leech
Floyd is absolutely obsessed with you. You’re a jellyfish, and jellyfish are cool—end of story.
He immediately nicknames you “Jelly,” much to your mild exasperation. “C’mon, Jelly! Let’s go do something fun!”
Floyd loves poking at your glowing features. “What happens if I touch this? Will it zap me?” (You have to swat his hand away repeatedly.)
Your calm nature intrigues him. “How do you stay so chill all the time? Don’t you ever wanna, like, flip out?” He sees it as a personal challenge to get you riled up.
He’s oddly protective of you. If anyone messes with you, Floyd’s mood sours instantly, and you have to calm him down before he does something drastic.
Floyd loves dragging you into the water to “swim like real jellyfish.” His playful nature contrasts hilariously with your serene floating.
Malleus Draconia
Malleus finds you absolutely enchanting. Your ethereal glow and calm presence remind him of a fairytale.
The first time he sees you glowing in the dark, he’s convinced you’re some sort of spirit. “Are you a creature of the night, summoned by the stars?” You laugh, which only confuses him more.
He adores your serene demeanor and often seeks your company when he’s feeling lonely. “You have a calming presence. It is… soothing.”
Your strategic mind impresses him. He occasionally consults you on matters of state, and your insight leaves him in awe.
Malleus is enchanted by your glowing features and bioluminescence. He often compares you to the stars and moon. “You shine as brightly as the night sky,” he says, his voice soft.
He’s protective of you, especially when others don’t understand your unique traits. “Anyone who dares mock your beauty will answer to me,” he declares, his aura dark and foreboding.
Riddle Rosehearts
Riddle is equal parts fascinated and exasperated by your serene and dreamy nature.
He struggles to reconcile your gentle demeanor with the strict order he upholds. “You can’t just let them get away with breaking rules.” But you always seem to handle things so effortlessly, he can’t help but feel a little envious.
The first time he sees your bioluminescence, he’s stunned. “W-What are you glowing for? Is that some sort of trick?” He secretly thinks it’s mesmerizing.
Your calmness has a soothing effect on him during his temperamental moments. When you gently suggest he take a deep breath, he can’t find it in himself to argue.
Your strategic mind earns his respect, especially when you help him resolve dorm conflicts with minimal drama. He finds himself seeking your counsel more often than he’d like to admit.
He tries to deny how much your presence comforts him, but when you glow softly under the moonlight, he’s reminded of the beauty of following one’s heart.
Vil Schoenheit
Vil finds you utterly captivating, both for your glowing beauty and your ability to remain so composed under pressure.
He immediately notices your bioluminescence and praises it as “natural elegance.” He may even use it as inspiration for his next photoshoot.
Vil admires your calm demeanor but insists on refining your presentation. “Grace comes naturally to you, but you must carry it with intention.”
Your ability to remain poised even under stress makes him jealous sometimes. He spends hours perfecting himself while you seem effortlessly radiant.
The two of you often engage in long conversations about leadership and balance. He’s impressed by your thoughtful insight, though he won’t always admit it.
He pretends not to care when others praise your ethereal glow, but he can’t help but feel proud, especially when you stand by his side at events.
Rook Hunt
Rook is absolutely enchanted by your jellyfish-inspired traits and ethereal aura.
The first time he sees your bioluminescence, he dramatically declares, “Magnifique! You are a creature of the heavens, a glowing gem beneath the sea!”
Rook constantly watches you, fascinated by the way you move and speak. He calls it research, but it’s really just admiration.
Your calmness intrigues him. He frequently tests your patience with his flamboyant antics, but you never falter, much to his delight.
He adores how your strategic mind contrasts with your soft demeanor. “You are as cunning as you are serene, ma chérie méduse.”
Rook writes poems inspired by your bioluminescent glow, claiming that no words could ever truly capture your beauty.
Rollo Flamme
Rollo is conflicted about you. Your calm, composed nature intrigues him, but your glowing features remind him of magic—something he loathes.
The first time he sees you glowing, he’s visibly unsettled. “Is this some kind of magic trick? I don’t trust it.” Yet, he can’t look away.
Your tranquil demeanor softens his usual disdain. He begrudgingly admits that you’re… tolerable, though his fascination with you grows daily.
Rollo’s jealousy flares whenever others praise your ethereal beauty. “They’re only bewitched by appearances,” he mutters, trying to convince himself he’s not affected.
Your intelligence earns his respect, though he won’t openly say it. He finds himself relying on your calm judgment more than he’d like.
Despite his feelings about magic, he catches himself enjoying the way your glow lights up dark spaces. It’s almost… comforting.
Masterlist
#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#twst#twisted wonderland#leona kingscholar x reader#leona x reader#leona kingscholar#azul x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#azul ashengrotto#jade leech x reader#jade x reader#floyd leech x reader#floyd x reader#floyd leech#malleus draconia x reader#malleus x reader#malleus draconia#riddle rosehearts x reader#riddle x reader#riddle rosehearts#rollo x reader#rollo flamme x reader#rollo flamme#rook hunt x reader#rook x reader#rook hunt#vil schoenheit x reader#vil x reader#vil schoenheit
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Wiping away cheek kisses from the 141 as a joke? Overall, not recommended 💀
‘M tired y’all, don’t judge. It’s just a little something different than usual, via my notes app, from my time w/o internet
With Price, come on. You really thought that was a good idea for a joke, sweet? 🤨 That wasn’t very nice. 0/10. Could probably go one of two ways, depending on his mood. Good mood: to teach you a lesson by withholding future kisses from you. How long that lasts is up to you, doll 🤷♂️ Bad mood? Oh, he needs you to accept his kisses. Can’t have his heart broken by the one person who brings him peace, after all. So, the prick pulls you right back to smother you with so many kisses that it’d be impossible to wipe them all away. You brought this upon yourself, doll 😌
With Simon…no. Not a good joke. -100/10. Might have a little moment of serious thought once he sees that hand come up to wipe away his kiss—wondering if he’d somehow missed one of your tells that you’d been upset with him about something. He swore he’d taken out the trash like you’d asked, swore he’d mopped the mud from his boots in the foyer—oh. Oh that was a joke? Not a very good one, luvie. Don’t scare him like that, yeah? Had a moment there where he almost thought that you were just losing interest in him, or something, but wouldn’t admit that. Can’t lose his favourite person, not now or ever. Doesn’t think he could stomach such a thought. Reassures himself at your cost, and crowds your space until you accept his fawkin’ kisses.
Kyle would most certainly pout. Ever attentive, he may gently try and ask if there was something wrong, at first. Had he done something to upset you? Was it that annoying coworker again? Was that obnoxious neighbour still bugging you? No? What is it then, luv? Some slight internal panic, but he masks it by trying to figure out what happened. Will use his skills in psychological warfare to ease the truth out of you—for your own good, he swears!—only to figure out that it was just a prank. Nearly had his heart beatin’ outta his chest, luv! 😮💨Don’t toy with him like that, yeah? Now give him a right proper kiss to apologise—
Trying this on Johnny will backfire. Be prepared for whiplash. Wipe away his kiss, and he’ll stand there for a moment, confused x100. Tries again—maybe you just had an itch? He’ll shave a lil for you later. But when you wipe that one away too, he knows what he saw. Frowns, and may or may not just pick you right up, and march you over to the couch/bed. What’s all this for, eh? Wipin’ away his kiss like that, bon? Relentless when he discovers it was only a joke. Welp! Looks like your stuck wherever he’s managed to pin you 😚 Just maybe save this prank until after he’s showered, next time, else risk smelling like his workout all day 🤷♂️
#wrinkled pages#Unedited of course so pls ignore any typos—#I did this one like half asleep#Call of duty#call of duty modern warfare#captain john price#simon ghost riley#kyle gaz garrick#john soap mactavish#cod price#cod ghost#Cod Gaz#cod soap#price x reader#ghost x reader#gaz x reader#soap x reader#reader insert#x reader
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im not the best at giving art advice since i dont stick to many set steps or techniques and my style changes quite quick BUT some stuff i would suggest that definitely helps me would be:
use reference!! so much! both real people/photos, and paintings/art in the styles you aspire towards! personally i like looking at photos of real people for poses, and oil painting type styles for rendering whether theyre digital or traditional (cuz theyre pretty)
make sure to look at the negative space and overall shape of things before any details, its good to use a big brush in colour and a sharp edged eraser first
dont be afraid to restart areas, its better to just retry than to work into it a load and make it look different than the rest of the piece
focal points!! the face should usually be the most detailed since its what people look at, other areas dont need to be as detailed and usually shouldnt be so they dont distract from the important areas
there are soooo many tutorials on youtube,, get an idea of the shapes youre drawing and actual anatomy vs stylistic shortcuts
dont overuse an airbrush/blending tool! i think every artist whos seen an art tutorial probably already knows that tip, but the soft edge of an airbrush is usually only found on shadows of CURVED forms, and using it on every shape can get rid of the depth
dont be scared to use super dark shades and super light shades! while you shouldnt use black for shadows (remember cool shadows for warm light, warm shadows for cool light) its still good to get contrast in your tones--you dont have to use loads of contrast but know WHY youre making that choice: is it a stylistic choice? is the 'camera' looking through something that reduces tone? is the light weak?
im not a professional or anything and this isnt aimed directly at your art, just some common mistakes/tips ive seen or heard other artists talk about!!
i still wanna improve my art too so if anyone has ideas to add to this feel free!!! art youtubers tend to have a lot better and more detailed advice than this so id recommend going and having a search around online
HELLLOOOOO CHAT !! this is my formal apology for not posting art for like.. 3 ish months... school is actual ass and my art and motivation has suffered because of it,,,, however my artstyle continues to change every other week which is always fun
here is a funky shuichi painting i literally just finished!! (THAT WAS MEANT TO BE A RENDERING STUDY. I SPENT 7 HRS ON IT INSTEAD.) i hope you lot enjoy :3
#art#art tips#my art#again im not a professional so correct me if i did a stupid#i just sit in my room and draw fictional people#true realism is very difficult so i usually draw in either a very stylised#or in some weird semirealistic style#can you guess which the shuichi painting is in#this tip list was longer than i meant it to be
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Haiii !! I'm obsessed with your blog. Do you have any tips for staying motivated? I wanna better my life and I have all the resources to do so. it's just motivation that's the problem 😓😓
surround yourself with inspiration.
for me, my friends are one of my biggest motivations—having people around who inspire and encourage you to grow is everything.
it’s not just about support; it’s about energy. being in a circle of people who push you, directly or indirectly, to be better is so important.
don’t lose sight of your goals.
always keep in mind what you’re working for, whether it’s an academic milestone or something personal. knowing your “why” makes the process so much easier.
when you have a clear picture of what you’re striving for, working hard feels purposeful instead of just tiring.
set HUGE goals, and then work backwards.
start with the biggest, boldest goal, then break it down into smaller, manageable steps that fill the gap between where you are now and where you want to be.
here’s what I mean: let’s say you’re in high school, and your ultimate goal is Cambridge.
you now → finishing an essay → getting a specific grade → finding balance → acing exams → writing your personal statement → Cambridge.
this is a very vague example, but the idea is to create a roadmap where every step feels doable—and every step brings you closer. you guys get my point hahaha
find balance to avoid burnout.
I’m a total workaholic, and spending time on things that don’t align with my main goals usually makes me feel horrible. but balance is non-negotiable.
for me, balance means baking with my friends, diving into hobbies that challenge me outside of academia, reading something complex but unrelated to my studies, or creating content like this to inspire others.
whatever it looks like for you, find something that lets you reset and recharge.
visualise, but don’t let it become procrastination.
I’m all for making Pinterest boards and visualising your dream life and I highly recommend doing it because it ties into the whole “don’t lose sight of your goals” idea.
BUT: overplanning can become its own trap. making endless lists, moodboards, or ideas without ever starting the actual work is just procrastination in a prettier outfit.
so yes, make your Pinterest board, set your goals, but don’t stop there. Start taking action, even if it’s just one small step today.
I hope this is helpful to you, and I wish you the very best on your journey, if you (or anyone else hahah) have more questions regarding this, just let me know, and we can dive into this topic a little deeper. <3
my insta @ malusokay
#malusokay#girl blogger#coquette#it girl#pink blog#that girl#askmalu#aesthetic#dream girl#pink pilates princess#motivation#get motivated#studyblr#study motivation#study blog#studyspo#student life#glow up journey#glow up tips#glow up#academia aesthetic#chaotic academia#dark academia#light academia#academics#university#student#classic academia#manifestation#gaslight gatekeep girlblog
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Will forever be grateful for this post and your writings crab! I usually read this every know and then! Really recommend and read crabdrables blog!! Sorry for the VERY late thoughts but taking L's left and right irl lol Onto some of my personal thoughts:
Relating very much with reader's unending cycle of self-doubt and hatred that may stem from themselves and from family too.
Ain't exactly an academic achiever expect when college but please for the love of find time in social life to or you'll kind of end up with reader here. Asian things lol.
Speaking of Asian things, reader's parents love language here is more on actions and less on verbal. This alright but kinda toxic when its something one thing only. Reader craves to of validation through words too. What's one action can be interpreted as another; example
Academic validation you'll find in majority of families unfortunately something reader thought that they should do for majority of their life but their is life outside school too.
Pleasing for other people is what person's identity will get themselves killed literally and metaphorically, it shows that reader is drained from what all happened in their life.
Reader really giving it all, as they think it would be make it or break it on the military.
Sad with reader that even if they joined the 141, their feelings of doubt and emptiness is still their and not easily those feeling be swayed easily.
Reader be yearning and wanting to be part of the 141 fam yet really made them out of place at the task force at first.
Calling "kid" by the 141 pulled me some of my heart strings, reader for sure was touched by their endearment thought they are still processing what the 141 say.
Reader's mind and thoughts be really damaged, so deep in their mind that they forgot the positive interactions with the 141.
Not the reader overhearing the string of Gaz' words and reader walking away not hearing the whole convo. Gaz seeing through reader and worried mother hen.
Ghost be the terrifying lt yet softie understanding big bro here.
Soap the ever social butterfly yet respecting social boundaries for reader.
Dad!Price ain't giving up reader that early. Yearning for someone like Price wanting to understand and talk to like reader here.
Reader may not feel that they have place in 141 but they already are, they are just in denial and still on process.
Reader be shocked that Price finds them.
Price be observant due to years being in the military.
“Something on your mind?” Price asks that lead to conversation his understanding that led to Reader's opening up even when they cried earlier.
Price be knight in shining armor and Papa bear that is ready to defend anyone and especially 141 and that includes the reader. "Violence and timing." as Price known quote.
Reader be awkward on calling Price's first name and sharing what on their mind is.
Price despite reader's doubts on their place on 141 still reassures and knows that reader is in the right place. That not anyone could replace reader as they already carve into 141's hearts.
Price giving reader more credit as he sees that reader worked their ass off hard and well.
Not the joked that turned to not joked with hugging and effing Reader still protecting their parents and Price horrified with the silence and revelation.
Captain with his words about obligation and not love for sure hit Reader's head like a truck.
Price really giving the words that Reader crave and wanted to hear for their whole life, did gave them hope and made them less empty.
Papa John Price gave hug that Reader may not realized that they need it.
Reader felt seen and appreciated for who they are. Reader be stuck and with their found family as long as they can (forever).
Hiii Crab so happy to see you write outside of our rants/idea chats and my fellow delulu cod enjoyer! Would love to request Platonic!141 + Reader (sorry if this is long and somewhat confusing lol). You can do headcanons, drabble or whatever you comfy for. An idea that popped in my head kinda semi personal: Civ or 141! Reader though has parents and family is the reader is quite something else. Reader despite having somewhat normal upbringing still feel empty; they shouldn't be feeling this numb and empty deep inside of them. The reader craves the love that they give but couldn't or lack of receiving it back, though they don’t expect it or selfishly want it. Just someone who understands them even in their deepest darkest secret or flaw then boom cue the task force 141 unexpected yet welcoming to their life and maybe the one that the Reader can lean and let them be vulnerable on (finally).
Take your time on doing this Looking for to your other writing genuinely -Cee, your fellow Soap delulu
GN!Reader & 141 (Mostly Price)
Warnings: Slight angst Ships: None. A/N: This absolutely ran away from me and I do not at all regret it, hope you enjoy, Cee!!! Words: 3549
Almost your entire life had been a cycle of self doubt that also started to churn and twist into self-hatred. You blamed yourself for the feelings. Afterall, you had a relatively normal upbringing. Two parents who were both present in your life, both of whom worked so that you all had food on the table and a roof over your head. A luxury that very few had.
The least you could do for them is follow the path that they wanted to put you on, no matter how much you didn’t want to do it. Because you loved them.
So you excelled in your education, studying hard to try and impress your parents– to make them love you just as much as you loved them for everything that they did for you for your entire life. They wanted you to do all three sciences despite the additional workload it would add to your already stretched thin time? Then you would do them, take any extra classes after school in order to keep up with the work and not lag behind any of your peers.
There was no such thing as a social life, either, not when you had homework and projects due. Friends were few and far between. Generally, most people left when they realised how hyper focused you were on your grades instead of social interaction.
Did a classmate get a higher grade than you on a test? Well obviously you didn’t study hard enough, you just needed to dedicate more time to school even though school was all you had.
Did you get the highest marks in the class? Good, that was what was expected of you. Why didn’t you get full marks? You were better than that. You would do better because you loved your family. They showed it in their own way, of course, by encouraging you to study harder and get better grades. That was their love language, and yours was doing as they asked without a second thought. Because, at the end of the day, you were lucky to have an upbringing like you had. You would ignore the hollow void clawing at your chest because you had no right to feel that way– not when you had a roof over your head and parents that loved you(?).
It was when you came top of the class with full marks in a recent test, you came home with a beaming smile on your face and proudly showed the test to your parents. They took the papers from your hands, flipping through your work with critical eyes, before handing the papers back to you.
‘Well done, we’re so proud of you.’ That was all you wanted them to say to you. That was all you needed to hear. To know that they loved you.
‘Your penmanship is terrible.’ Was what you got instead. When you tried to point at the big 100% in green pen, you were waved away. ‘How are you expected to get a job when you write like a child? I’m surprised the teacher could even read your answers’.
After several years of balancing a work and educational life and paving a way for a line of work that you didn’t want for parents you should have been grateful to have, you decided that enough was enough.
No matter how hard you worked, no matter how high your marks were, they would never be proud of you. They would never return the love that you had for them until you nearly killed yourself trying.
Spending your entire childhood, teenagehood and all of your current adulthood trying to please your parents predictably would damage one’s psyche. You had no friends, family who had never been devoted to you as you were to them, and high grades serving as the foundations to a prison-like future.
You dropped out of University. The only option forward that you saw was joining the army in the vain hope that the empty feeling inside of you would dissipate when you actually did something that you believed was more worthwhile than any University course.
So you threw yourself into the military, working harder than all of the other recruits and training at every chance you could.
Your skills and determination became widely recognised amongst your peers. It took several years, but you eventually caught the eye of none other than Captain John Price.
Impressed by your willpower that not many soldiers possessed, he offered you a place on the 141.
Naturally, you agreed. You believed that being part of such a well renowned and respected team would finally beat back the lingering self doubt and emptiness that had curled itself around your heart.
It didn’t. If anything, it made it worse.
You were invited to join the 141, sure, but they had already established their own relationships between each other, had already bonded into a close knit group, and you were simply an outsider. Yes, you had been hand picked by Price himself, but that didn’t mean you were part of the team. They had their own inside jokes that they told to one another, leaving you feeling left out on most days.
And you felt… lacking around them. Ghost was stronger, Gaz was faster, Soap was smarter (he was a demolitions expert for crying out loud!), and Price was almost all of those rolled into one. They all complimented each other as a team. Meanwhile you felt like a spare tyre, a master of nothing and barely a jack of any trade.
Despite how you felt about it all, they all called you ‘kid’. Regardless of age gaps between yourself and the rest of them, the nickname stuck mostly because you were the newbie. It came as a surprise that it wasn’t spat with vitriol as your peers before had, but it was in fact said with… an affection you couldn’t quite place.
You couldn’t ignore the hole in your chest that had been chipped at over the years, forming a gaping maw that no reassurances could really mend.
Doubt lingered in the back of your mind, chipping away at your sanity as you prepared for the worst. How long would it take before they realised you weren’t good enough?
You were so deep in your doubts that you didn’t realise that you had been distancing yourself even more than before until you overheard a conversation in Price’s office a few months down the line.
“-- they don’t belong on the team.” Gaz said as you passed Price’s office and your heart dropped. It was only the tailend of what he had been saying but you had gotten the gist. You wanted to stay, to listen to the conversation more and listen to what your team had to say about you, but you didn’t. What you were going to hear were likely things you had already told yourself right from the start. You keep walking on, ignoring the sting of tears burning in the corners of your eyes. The blood rushing in your ears prevented you from heating the rest of the conversation.
“-- not only are they acting like they don’t belong on the team, but they’re acting like they’re not good enough.” Gaz continued, sighing in frustration.
“Maybe they need more time.” Ghost rumbled in reply, “Let them come out of their shell a little bit. Best not rush these things.” He was talking from experience, after all.
“Aye… maybe I can invite them out for drinks or sommat? I wouldn’t want them getting transferred before we got to know them a little more.” Soap had been the one that had tried the hardest to get close to you but had also tried to give you space so as to not suffocate you with his personality.
“They won’t be getting transferred.” Price said with conviction, tapping his desk, “I chose them to be part of this team and this is where they’re going to stay. Let me have a word with them first.”
“Aye, sir.”
— — — — — —
You found yourself in the smoker’s shelter outside the main building. It was late enough that most of the soldiers had gone to bed or off to do their own things elsewhere so you doubted that you would be bothered for a little while. Just enough time for you to get your thoughts together. Your tears had dried in your eyes a few minutes ago, making them sting in the cold air. You didn’t need to look in your reflection to know that you probably looked like a wreck– entirely unbecoming of a soldier of your apparent status.
You didn’t want to get transferred. Despite your distance with the 141, you didn’t hate them. Far from, actually, you held a great deal of respect for each and every one of them. It was just that you felt like you didn’t have your place amongst them. Not good enough to be associated with them.
“Bit late to be out here in the cold, chuck.” A voice startled you out of your thoughts– one that you would recognise anywhere from the low rasp of a smoker's lungs.
“Captain.” You croaked, wincing at the patheticness in your voice. There was a scuff of boots as Price came closer, leaning into your line of vision with a furrowed brow which only furrowed more as he took in your dishevelled appearance.
“Something on your mind?” He asked kindly, perching on the arm of the bench to give you some personal space. He left his question open, allowing you any chance to steer the conversation how you wanted to. There was no judgement for catching you at your lowest, no disgust at your red rimmed eyes— just polite understanding and a non verbal offer of pleasant company.
“Why did you pick me, Captain?”
The question made him tilt his head, a frown beginning to tug on his features. You were worried you had insulted him.
“What brought this on, huh? Someone say something to you? Need me to have a word with them?” He straightened his back, scowling. Whilst you felt like you didn’t have a place in the 141, you could never deny the shield of protectiveness that Price held over his team. You remember in the back of your mind the day that some General who thought he was hot shit had the audacity to undermine Soap as nothing more than a ‘yappy dog’ when offered the Scot’s demolitions expertise. Price had appeared almost out of thin air and almost ripped the General a new one and things would have escalated into a fist fight had Laswell not intervened. It wasn’t as though Price didn’t think his own soldiers were capable of defending themselves, but he couldn’t care less about punishments aimed his own way over that of his Sergeants and Lieutenant. It was just a surprise that the protective streak extended over you, too, despite your distance to your teammates.
“I’ll sound stupid.” You mumbled, looking down at the ground as if expecting him to chastise you like a child. He didn’t.
“I’ve had my fair share of stupid over the years. Try me.”
“... and ungrateful.”
“I once had a guy punch me in the face two seconds after I took a bullet that would have killed him.” Price countered with a cut off chuckle once he remembered what was probably a mission long finished and cleared his throat. “C’mon, tell Captain what’s on your mind.”
And he sounded so sincere when he said it. Sounded like he genuinely wanted to hear what was going on in your head– that he was willing to waste what was already his important and limited time on someone like you.
“Sir—”
“John.” Price corrected gently, crows feet more noticeable at the corners of his eyes scrunched up when he smiled, “We’re off duty, you don’t need to be so formal.”
��... John.” You echoed, finding that you really didn’t like saying that. It felt like calling your teacher by their first name in primary school or a classmate’s parent other than their last name.
“Now, c’mon, tell me what’s on your mind. Might not be a therapist, but I’m better than bottling it up.” You wondered in the back of your mind how often Price did this. Sat with his soldiers and talked with them, offered them a listening ear to hear their vents and fears. You couldn’t help but feel honoured to be one of the few he willingly offered said time to. Your silence stretched on as you thought of the words to say, how to phrase what you wanted to say without sounding unappreciative of the opportunity that Price had offered you when he requested you join his team.
“I don’t feel like I belong here.” You blurted once the silence had stretched on for long enough to border on uncomfortable. John’s face fell and you quickly realised how bad that sounded and rushed to correct yourself.
“No, no, wait, let me explain–” the Captain closed his mouth to allow you to continue speaking, but you could tell that it was hard for him. “I just… you could have anyone better than me, you know? I’m not a demolition expert. I’m… I’m not the best Sniper. I’m the slowest on the team, pretty sure I’m the weakest–”
“Nope.” Price interrupted, finally breaking the bubble of your personal space as he took a proper seat next to you on the bench but still respecting the distance enough to keep a few inches between you. “Nope, not lettin’ you say another word.”
“But–”
“Nope.”
“Cap–”
“No.”
“But you could have anyone better—“
“But they wouldn’t be you.” He deflected easily. Far too easily. He leant back on the bench, crossing one leg over the other as he folded his arms over his chest. His fingers twitched and you could tell he was itching for a cigar but didn’t light one out of respect.
“Alright, sure, I can ask Laswell to give me one of the best soldiers in the SAS and have them brought here tomorrow. They could be the best of the best, top of their class, better than you and maybe even better than me. But that’s a bit of a stretch.” He winked and earned a weak chuckle from you. “But they won’t be you. I don’t pick just on skill alone, kid, I pick based on how I feel people would fit into the team. I chose you because I knew that you’d be perfect.”
“As for not being a demolitions expert, let me let you in on a little secret. I’ve no fucking clue about demolitions, either. And you don’t have to be on the team to be the ‘best Sniper’. You’re better than most, and that’s what’s important. As for being the weakest– did you or did you not bodily lift Gaz in a fireman’s carry during training the other week while he was trying to act as an injured civilian? Quite dramatically, might I add. Swooned and everything.”
You remembered that practice mission. Quite fondly, actually. Gaz was a civilian and , after being struck by a foam bullet from Soap, had dramatically screamed in agony and crumpled to the floor. When you had lifted him up and over your shoulders, the bastard continued to wail something along the lines of telling his non-existent spouse that he loved them and that his money be given to his equally non-existent children. Soap got in another shot to the man’s head, knocking off his cap in the process. Distracted as you were trying to haul your teammate out of the danger zone, you couldn’t help but laugh thinking about it now.
“Last time I checked, Gaz is somewhat heavier than a sack of flour. Don’t tell him I said that, I’ll hurt his feelings.” Price was right, you supposed. You were more than capable of carrying Gaz over your shoulders, maybe even Soap or Price himself if the time called for it. Ghost you weren’t so sure about, though. The man was a walking mountain.
“What I’m trying to say is that you have to give yourself more credit. You’re more than good enough to be on my team. I chose you for a reason.”
You… did not expect that sort of reassurance from Price. You had hoped for something along those lines, yes, but perhaps with a thrown in criticism or three. You waited for a ‘but’ that never came. The man snorted beside you and when you gave him a quizzical look, he waved off your concern.
“Shit, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think the next thing out of your mouth would be that your parents never hugged you as a kid.”
Your silence made him slowly turn his head towards you. It would have almost been comical if the situation wasn’t. His face crumbled and a wounded sound emerged from his throat.
“Sometimes they did!” You rushed to defend the people that raised you. “And they gave me food and shelter, clothes when I needed them–”
“Fucking hell. No, that’s what they’re supposed to do because they’re your parents. What about telling you that they were proud of you? That they loved you? I saw your records. Top of your class in not just your training but in your education, too. Triple sciences, mathematics, all of it. They had to be proud of you for that? My parents would have killed for me to get even a passing grade in my GCSEs.” You looked down at the ground and it was Price’s turn to have his eyes fixed on you.
“They were proud of you, weren’t they?” He asked again, leaning forwards so he could catch your eye, his own filled with concern. “Kid?”
“I don’t talk to them much anymore.”
Price inhaled sharply and he leaned back again, looking around and clenching his jaw as if fighting back his anger. His fingers twitched again. You admired his self control as he was still yet to grab a cigar that you knew he kept on his person. Usually in his breast pocket while his lighter was in his right pocket.
“Listen to me.” The Captain said, a more stern edge to his voice now that he had gathered his thoughts together. “Whatever your family said to you— how they treated you? Forget it. They showed you obligation. Not love. They didn’t want what was ‘best’ for you, they wanted bragging rights. What you’ve achieved– here, in bootcamp, in university and in school, is something to take pride in– no, no, look at me.”
Your gaze had trailed to the side so you avoided looking at your Captain in the eyes. He noticed and clicked his fingers to gain your attention back on him.
“Don’t look away from me because I want you to listen to what I’m gonna say and I want you to look at my face as I say it.” Your eyes met his blue ones, “You should be proud of everything that you’ve achieved in your life. I’m sorry that your family never told you that and I’m sorry that I haven’t said that enough to you since you joined 141.”
You opened your mouth to say something– to argue or disagree but he shook his head.
“No. It’s my turn to speak now. I’m proud of you. I am so proud of you. Everything you’ve done and everything that you’re yet to do, I will always be proud of you. You’re an exemplary soldier and I knew the moment I saw you that you would be a perfect addition to the 141 and you have proved me right time and time again. You belong on this team just as much as the rest of the boys. Do you understand?”
So many words– proud, proud, proud. That’s all you had wanted to hear for so many years from someone whose opinion mattered to you. You wanted to be seen and Price, this godsend of a man, had seen you and more.
“Kid, do you understand me?”
You nodded once and then realised that Price wouldn’t have been able to tell through your shaking. Tears blurred in the corners of your eyes and you nodded again, not trusting your voice in case it shattered.
“What do you need from me?” Price’s voice was oh so soft, like he was talking to a frightened fawn. He could see how much his words had affected you and it clearly broke his own heart.
“A hug.” Your bottom lip wobbled and his face softened as he opened his arms, twitching his fingers to urge you closer.
“I can do that.”
You leaned into him and he quickly wrapped his arms around you, drawing you in close. You could smell the lingering scent of his last cigar. The smell of his office and cleaning oil. You felt his chin on the top of your head and felt how his chest rumbled as he spoke.
“You’re part of the 141 whether you like it or not, alright? Me and the boys want you here for as long as you want to be.”
At that moment, for the first time in your life. You felt wanted. You felt appreciated and you felt seen.
have a request? send one in!
#eicee personal#eicee rants#eicee writes#call of duty#platonic x reader#john price platonic#platonic task force 141#cod mw2 platonic#platonic relationships#platonic
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mama, a stray kid behind YOU ★ @seunghyunjigglers
ot8 skz members as brainrot memes!
author's note: we even included links for some of the less chronically online divas out there (generous much?)! a lot of thought and effort went into this and we hope you love and appreciate our firstborn child. tw: dark humor. betas, do not interact!
chan ★ "i'm the leader, i'm the alpha, i'm the one to trust"
unironically watches bad edits of himself and goes "ayeee" to hype himself up about being edited
comments under them on his secret account
his fyp is now most definitely infiltrated by alpha chan edits
let's be real the whole trend was probably what inspired wolfgang to be released
bites his lip bc he thinks it makes him look sexy and he just looks like he's eating his bottom lip
tries to do that thing where guys put their necklace between their lips and take pics to be sexy but the necklace falls down his throat and he starts choking
would deliberately start doing aegyo followed by serving face to show his 'duality' since apparently the fandom love it (poor guy doesn't understand irony still)
LOVES when stays talk about his gyatt and starts using it bc he thinks its just another normal word for ass and seungmin and felix almost throw up laughing at him
minho ★ "queen never cry"
genuinely thought 'lock in' was something to be taken seriously and does NOT take it lightly when chan tells everyone to lock in
his kinky ass also probably thought it was some kind of jail roleplay (jisung had to explain it to him)
has mewing competitions with himself in the mirror
makes 'minho never CRY 💜' the note on his alarm in the morning
thinks it’s funny when he recommends the ki sisters manga (where the meme comes from) to people as his favorite series and the poor author has to actually go on a talk show cause he blew it up with the internet
checks his notifications EVERY day hoping someone will edit him with that baby
accidentally comments “queen NEVER cry” under a sentimental skz edit on the official account and wakes up with several calls from his managers.. let’s just say it didn’t go over well
changbin ★ "gadagadegadagadao" (omega nugget)
he stumbled across this meme on felix's fyp one evening and thought it would make the best vocal warmup for his raps, didn't realise it was a joke and actually uses it before recording tracks
when he discovers its a meme he thinks its hilarious and makes it his whole personality
stops mid convo with people and makes the face and thinks he's so funny (everyone is tired of it)
orders mcdonald's for everyone and takes the time to draw the face on EVERY chicken nugget and couldn't be prouder of himself
genuinely thinks the song is an actual banger and has it saved as a sample for a potential title track
hyunjin ★ "donatella VERSACE"
only types like THIS 💜 and felix and seungmin are the only ones who get it
chan finds out and secretly changes his name in a groupchat with their managers and staff to "hwang HYUNJIN 💜"
he is tired but donatella is not
his gag christmas present for secret santa is boxers with ms versace herself covering his chocolate starfish and he has a wardrobe malfunction while wearing them at a show and EVERYONE sees
is actually really embarrassed when he has to explain what it means to her and she just nods and tries to smile with all her botox
after this she comments it on all her posts and he accepts that he’s never escaping it
jisung ★ "jiafei 'in my head' remix" (floptropica)
this man is always singing his lungs out in every skz code and somewhere along the way he saw an edit of him with jiafei's vocals in the bg
was actually impressed by her vocal skills and tried to hunt down her ig page, ends up on some fake floptropican fanpage but he doesn't know this because he has minimal survival skills
dms some loser message like "wow your voice is sooooo nice haha...i also like to sing lol...so do you like korean boys haha..."
owner of the jiafei fan account is a stay and thinks this is hilarious and catfishes the hell out of him for WEEKS, sends vocal edits and jisung unironically eats them up, he def sends back vms of him doing vocal covers to impress her
felix hears him singing a jiafei remix one day and almost shits himself laughing, jisung gets angry and defensive until felix reveals that jiafei is literally a meme
realises he's been catfished
blocks the account and gets sulky whenever any floptropican edit pops up on his fyp, but still sings the jiafei remixes quietly to himself (some habits are hard to break)
felix ★ "oi oi oi...baka" (freaky larvae)
recreates it and everyone takes it seriously and he has to make a video telling everyone it was not in fact a thirst trap
breaks up serious arguments like "we need to calm down...you're all being a bunch of...heh...bakas..."
searches it up one day to see if there's any other lore and accidentally discovers a yagami yato audio and gets traumatised
seungmin gets fed up by felix constantly repeating it so he comes up with a master plan and during one of their japan concerts says "oh, felix has been practicing his japanese lately...what's that thing you keep saying?"
i feel like he'd perfect that freaky expression and everyone is sick of him and changbin for randomly using them
picks larva on his turn to choose something for movie night and everyone comically (see what i did there) groans and gets up while he’s just there cracking up
seungmin ★ "saddam hussein hiding spot"
this guy saw a 'saddam hussein hiding spot' comment under jeongin's post and fell down the rabbithole (or rather, the entrance covered in bricks and rubble)
thinks its HILARIOUS because it's a historically accurate meme (nerd!)
definitely whispers it every single time he sees someone or something laying down and everyone is so fed up with it, also gets felix to do the voice since he can imitate it perfectly
uses it as an excuse to randomly start lying down during dance practices and when everyone complains he just says "why am i lowkey serving saddama hussein hiding spot?"
he'd take this shi so seriously like he'd be doing the math to figure out how much time to spend on each app each day so he can make his daily screen time average look like saddam hussein JUST to make the reference
jeongin ★ "that feeling when knee surgery is tomorrow"
someone makes a comment about how they tore their acl and have to get knee surgery and he goes "that feeling when knee surgery is tomorrow" and starts laughing
it wasn't very funny to said someone
probably has to make one of those formal instagram apology posts because of it (he sets the music as the bg for the original post but his manager makes him delete it and post again)
fake falls at practice and when everyone crowds around him all worried he says he feels like he might need knee surgery tomorrow and gets kicked out of the room
pays an insane amount of money to get everyone matching knee surgery knee pads for practice and absolutely loses it every time someone actually needs to use it and has no other choice
posts a fake hospital pic with “do NOT get your knee surgery from shein !!” on his secret account
asks for permission to change his pfp to the grinch and considers outing jyp when he gets told no
#skz#skz imagines#stray kids#skz smut#stray kids smut#bangchan#lee know#changbin#hyunjin#han jisung#lee felix#seungmin#jeongin#stray kids headcanons#skz headcanons#skz fic#skz x reader#skz x you#stray kids x reader#stray kids scenarios#skz scenarios#skz imagine#stay kids imagines#skz kpop#skz meme#stray kids meme#skz memes#stray kids x you#stray kids ot8#skz ot8
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I'm watching Marc Marquez's documentary 'All in' (thank u to the person who recommended it) and I'm on the ep where he yk talks about his rivalry with Rossi. And I was like oh wow, wouldn't it be sick if they made Lewis Hamilton do that, like make him do a deep dive on his rivalry (divorce) with his teammate (something more than a bsf) Nico Rosberg. Then I realised it would never work out cuz he's been made to do that multiple times but he's still in BIG FACT DENIAL. And it'd just be frustrating to watch cuz he'll just deny everything.
Whenever Lewis has to talk about Nico it makes me realise that the great 7x WC SIR Lewis Hamilton in fact just a man, he is still just a petty little human who refuses to acknowledge his VERY REAL situationship with his bsf. He persists on tryna just rub everything about him nico out of existence. 😭 But we will not be fooled.
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💗 a fic you’ve reread again and again and why!
omg thank you em and thank you anon i really wanted to answer this one lol i've been strategising my answers to this game so i can recommend as many of my favourite fics as possible heehee
from this fun little fic game
💗a fic you’ve reread again and again and why!
ok so i need to front this by saying i am a HUGE rereader of fic, like i definitely reread more than i read new fic, and i read a good bit of new fic lol
i think i'm going to pick a category here and say these are comfort fics because i was actually thinking of making a post about comfort fics anyway so this is a lovely excuse
Comfort reads Water Will Touch My Skin and Home Come Next Spring by @love-leah i have to limit myself to 2 here but every single thing leah has written. if i have a bad day i come home and i read one of these. i've actually recently had to put these into a category for absolute emergencies so they don't lose their magic but i've probably read these 10-15 times each and there's no sign of that happening yet
hot to go by orphan_account this fic is the definition of warm to me, it feels like a wooly jumper but not a scratchy kind, like going away down the country with your friends for a weekend, like curling up in front of the fire in cozy socks.
around your corner by @prettydangrotten this is escaping to the bathroom at a party you don't want to be at, thinking about the person who makes things better... everything in here is so careful, from the phone album set up to the photos, it's so claustrophobic but so warm at the same time, this is all time carlos to me
ok one more gotta be your familiars fic em, lol sorry to recommend you your own work again, i read this when i was still a lurker, it was posted when i was in the middle of grading a bunch of undergrad exams at like 1am or something stupid just after christmas in my parent's house and i saw it on my pomodoro break and it gave me the strength to keep going. i most recent read this the morning of the US election results if that tells you anything.
#this took me so long but it's because i was having fun!#also had some more on here but then got another ask so i can use them for that heehee i love recommending fic#ask#tag game
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“responding to the last bit first because… sometimes carrds ARE the most trustworthy sources” Respectfully, what part of “generally aren’t reliable” did you not understand.
Saying “Im in an x mindset right now” won’t exactly work, seeing that many polyminds named their minds and perceive them as unique individuals; which may make it weird for them to say something similar as that. I also frankly don’t see how active implies at fronting, but that might be my language barrier.
For the Active-stuck, the same applies; not all terms from the Carrd have actually carried over nor have they been used often. But I do appreciate your opinion about the merge/tear terms, it’s something I’ll keep in mind when researching it.
This is a bit off track, but please do not use the “kinnie” term; let alone to describe someone who has a strong connection to a character. The term comes from the KFF community, and if you wish to describe someone who’s connected to a fictional character then the term fictionhearted would be right. But to answer the actual response, I think there’s two main ways this can happen. 1: the mind already existed but picked up the appearance personality and whatnot. 2: the mind was formed due to a reason, such as the need for comfort, and due to the persons current circumstances it is based off something they associate with what could help, such as their comfort character.
Explaining the self is… rather complicated, I really recommend looking at the second link I’ve sent in my last reblog and scrolling down to the section where it explains what it is.
The critique of the term “shattermethod” and very much understandable, I can see where you’re coming from with it. All though note that I do not use the surviveshatter label and it was made by another polymind who formed due to stress and traumatic events as a coping mechanism during their teenage years. I’ll probably reword the definition though like you suggested, and ngl the definition you provided is awesome sauce.
I don’t think any of it was written weird tbh, though also disclaimer that if I sound hostile or passive aggressive at any point then that isn’t my intention. Words are just hard for me.
Polymind is a bit fascinating because it ends up unintentionally showing why system terminology ends up not being exclusive to any one specific group.
Like when you try to describe plural experiences in a way that tries not to use an existing plural definitions, it shows a lot more blatantly that at its core we do all have the same experience of being more than one. Any term you make has a high chance of applying to the other group.
Then when you get into the terminology needed to actually describe those experiences, you find you kind of need most of the shared terminology otherwise you need to recreate the whole damn lexicon.
Like the reason terms get shared is more like "We have DID need a fast and easy way to describe fictional alters. Oh, soulbonders have a lot of terminology for this already that fits what we need, we'll start using fictive and source."
Or "We're a non-disordered system and need a way to describe one headmate taking over. Oh, medically there's switching and front, that's a fast and simple way to describe it."
And like a lot of subcultures online are like that and when you try to fight it you end up with complicated and not very practical terms. Especially when there's terms that have been used for over 30 goddamn years that are simpler and easier to use.
Hell even trying not to use any existing plural terminology, Polymind ended taking a lot of them unintentionally (i.e. part, ageling, little, protector).
It also highlights an issue where unless you do deeper introspection, which is not always practical for... obvious reasons, you probably won't know exactly what you fall under. Expecting people to look in depth trauma history to figure out what terminology they're allowed to use is despicable.
Also that the problem is at its core that people don't think we should exist at all and that the terminology stink ends up being more of a way to make harassment and fakeclaiming seem "justified" and also a method of erasing history and separating systems from resources/making them harder to find but eh
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Hi everyone,
I have something to share about how Patreon subscribers will keep accessing exclusive content in the future. Starting very soon, I'll be introducing a new way to provide early access that ensures a more secure and fair experience for everyone who supports my work. This change will allow me to continue creating without unnecessary stress, while keeping content accessible for all.
Why this change?
Unfortunately, piracy has been a growing issue. My interactive fictions are always free, with early access available as a thank-you for my Patreon supporters. But lately, even this small gesture of support has been undermined by piracy.
Creating interactive fiction takes hours of daily effort, research, and creativity. Sharing my stories publicly is something I love to do, but piracy adds unnecessary stress to an already demanding process. I'm not EA or Valve—I'm not a big corporation that can shrug off the effects of piracy. At this point, I earn less than 20 cents for every hour of work I put into my interactive stories. Imagine earning so little for your hard work, only to see it taken and distributed without your permission—It's disheartening, frustrating, and ultimately unsustainable. It makes me feel devalued as a creator and disrespects the readers who contribute honestly in the first place.
If you've been sharing or downloading pirated copies of my work, I’d ask you to reconsider. I know sometimes it can seem like no harm is being done, but piracy takes away from the time and effort I put into creating these stories. What’s more, my stories always become completely free in less than 30 days. Stealing the early access version only hurts the person creating it—and there's no benefit to you. All you need to do is wait a little while to enjoy the same story, for free, as intended.
To put it bluntly: piracy sends a clear message that my time and effort aren't valued. If you steal from me, you're not a fan of my work; you have no respect for another struggling human being. If this continues, I'll have no choice but to rethink how—or if—I share my work publicly. I'm just a person like you, and I want to keep writing and sharing these stories with you, but only if it's a relationship built on trust and mutual respect.
To my supporters...
To those of you who support me through Patreon, reblog my Tumblr posts, or simply read and recommend my stories—you are the reason I keep going! Your kindness, encouragement, and honest engagement mean the world to me. You have nothing to be concerned about the new security measures I plan to test—these changes won't complicate your access but will help protect the development of the stories you love.
Thank you for understanding and standing by me! ♥
P.S.: If you are a fellow creator of interactive fiction, and you too have a similar problem, feel free to contact me here, on Discord, or even on Patreon if you prefer. I'd love to exchange ideas and put up a united front.
#Announcement#Important#Patreon#InteractiveFiction#Piracy#CreatorSupport#SupportCreators#ContentCreators#IndieCreator#RespectCreators#EarlyAccess#PiracyIssues#Storytelling#WritingCommunity#IndependentCreator#PatreonSupport#CreativeStruggles#FairAccess#NoToPiracy#WriterLife#SupportIndieCreators
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Well, I guess that kudos is sticking around, but honestly, it doesn't change the fact that the work didn't land for me. I wasn’t trying to be mean, just saying what I thought. If you're gonna publish it, fine, but don’t act like it was some sort of high praise. Keep the kudos if you want, but don't expect me to pretend I liked it.
Interpreting my response to your previous ask as acting like it was some sort of high praise is an INSANE failure of reading comprehension.
You absolutely did intend to be mean, you're just upset that I thought your insults were funny instead of taking them to heart.
'But don't expect me to pretend I liked it.' Listen. I need you to stop and think about this for a second. We are complete strangers to one another. I'm not expecting you to pretend you like it. I do not know you. I don't want or crave your regard because, once again, you are a stranger and my only interaction with you thus far has been you sending a rude ask to my tumblr account. Whether you like it or not does not mean anything to me because I do not know anything about you as a person or your personal tastes. I am not a friend or coworker who expects you to put on a good face despite your true opinion.
I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you're very young and haven't yet learnt how to appropriately interact with strangers online, so to recap: this ain't it. That message you sent was one of the cringiest things I've seen in more than 20 years of participating in various online fandoms. You need to reread what you write before you send it and really think about if that's the way you want to represent yourself, even anonymously.
But above all: it's fanfiction. Free gay internet writing. Written by a rando you do not know, and do not have to interact with. Just close your internet browser window and don't think about it again. You're the one who initiated this. You are the one dragging out your association with a fic you do not like. Contacting me twice now about a fic you didn't like is indisputably strange behavior. If you want to participate in fandom spaces without alienating everyone, including writers you do admire, you need to stop doing this sort of thing. The reaction is always going to be, 'What a douche'. Even from people who themselves don't like the fic it was aimed at. Your time in fandom will be far more pleasant if you concentrate your time and attention on the fan creations you DO enjoy, and that is what I recommend you do.
I can't tell you what to do, obviously, but I encourage you not to message me again. I will delete any future responses from you, because frankly, this is not healthy behavior and you need to focus on something that brings you enjoyment instead of getting hung up on a single fic you didn't like. I have disliked and not finished loads of fanfics. I merely close the window I was reading it in and go do something else, and that is what you need to do.
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Please, PLEASE Tulpar crew x a very shy/introverted reader who is like crushing on the crew really hard but way too shy and embarrassed to tell them but like the crew starts to slowly catch on to them and the way they act different around them. Also I don't mean the crew as a whole I mean the separate characters 😭🙏🏽
ask and u shall receive 😈
-------------------------------------------------------
OH GOD, YOU CAN TELL?
----------------------------
Captain Curly
-oh.. curly knew from the moment you laid eyes on him that you had the biggest crush on him.
-there is no slow realization.
-not at all oblivious to it.
-everytime your eyes would seemingly uncontrollably and totally unconsciously drift to him he would try to meet your gaze with a friendly, boyish smirk.
-does that happen? HELL NAH. you are much too shy to even look the captain in the eye.
-your little heart almost beats out of your chest at any interaction. little or big.
-"Hey, just the person I needed to see. I have a little favor to ask you."
-oh god. suddenly words seem hard to pronounce and the entirety of the english language is no where to be seen.
-after a few weeks, curly would definitely find this endearing.
-i feel like since curly is so outgoing, he would be very intrigued by someone who is the complete opposite.
-curly wouldn't act much different when it comes to you, due to maintaining professionalism as his role as captain.
-he may due small acts like making a cake simply to indulge in your sweet-tooth that he somehow knew about you.
-"oh, we just had extra packets of sugar. i just thought id bake something. you like cake right?"
-cheeky motherfucker.
Intern Daisuke
-dude is so so so oblivious even though you make it perfectly clear...
-you could be making like.. making out with the guy and he'd be like,
-"yoo, we are literally besties right?"
-deadass, he prolly had no idea you liked him for weeks.
-you could be laughing extra loud at his jokes then realize ur laughing too loud, look at him while he isn't looking at you, sneak an extra sweetener packet on his bed when he isn't around,,,,
-his ass still is clueless.
-it takes either curly or swansea's help to realize that you had a massive crush on him but were just to shy to say something.
-once he realizes, he is now all over you and following you around like a lost puppy. not nonchalant at ALL.
-literally tries to pick up the polle statue to show his 'guns' but the statue moves only an inch..
-now he is hyper aware of your actions and reactions, he finds your shyness just SO CUTE WTFFF.
-compliments you to see what you would do.
-"man, have you always been this hot or is it just the sweetener talking?"
-runs away.....
-would steal sweetener packets just for you two to share :)
Nurse Anya
-i feel like she notices how different you act around her, but she just thinks its because you two are good friends.
-she never assumes anything, just her friend being friendly.
-even though you sometimes make it unintentionally obvious..
-like this one time you recommend her a book from your quarters library and her fingers lightly grazed yours reaching for it.
-oh shit. her soft hands touched yours. oh god what does a normal person do in this situation??
-"thank you for the-oh... book."
-well, they don't smile awkwardly, sweat pouring down their face and leave in a hurry with the book still in their hand.
-anya isn't stupid or completely oblivious by any means. she definitely knew from this encounter of your little crush on her.
-she is quite flattered honestly. someone so similar to her truly likes her?
-when she fully processes this information, she is very subtle with how she shows her affection back.
-during check-ups, she sometimes gives you a treat from one of her desk drawers for being a good patient.
-other times she lets you join her late at night in the lounge to just look at the pretty night time screen.
-"this makes me miss home. it's so beautiful."
-you'd look over at her and her eyes are not on the screen, far from it actually.
-her eyes are on you.
-so this is what a heart attack feels like..
Mechanic Swansea
-unpopular hot-take, swansea is actually a dilf and he often has younger men/women confess their feelings to him.
-so because of that headcanon, swansea definitely knows how you feel from the first time y'all met.
-your eyes would subconsciously peek at his open shirt revealing his chest. suspiciously, whenever he would look back, you quickly turn away shyly...
-he immediately thinks he is way to old for this shit. he just got out of a divorce and prolly never wanted to try again. especially with someone younger.
-"what is with this damn younger generation with old people.."
-he tries to avoid you even though you two are co-workers and.. work together. on the same ship.
-as weeks go by, your shyness starts to grow on this grumpy man. he... he thinks it's endearing in a sense..
-he rather likes how reserved you are, and how are aren't as loudmouthed as daisuke.
-he won't act much different to you, but according to the rest of the crew it is obvious.
-swansea leaves little sticky notes reminding you to eat or sleep because and the sticky note quotes,,
-"..the crew doesn't need you passin' out while doin' your job. so eat or i will make you."
-swansea is also much more soft-spoken with you than anyone else.
-he has never raised his voice or spoken down on you. his usual brashness and snarky remarks are now toned down (but not entirely) around you.
-"hey. i didn't say you had to leave, did i? stop puttin' words in my damn mouth and sit."
Co-captain Jimmy
-jimmy prolly doesn't even acknowledge you at first.
-you could be looking at him, thinking he doesn't know that your eyes are skimming over his face and body.
-oh but jimmy.. he does know,,, but he never shows that he does.
-he likes the attention on him. your eyes looking him over when she doesn't even know that he is soaking it up.
-im sorry but he definitely gets off to the fact that you are shy and get flustered easily.
-he loves how malleable and submissive you are due to your shyness. and he uses it to his advantage.
-he shows his affection strongly after he knows your crush.like sometimes he would purposefully follow you places and when you turn around he'd be like..
-"do you mind? you're in my way.."
-i feel like he wouldn't know how to properly express his feelings so he would be kind of unnecessarily mean and cruel.
-and after he would be mean he would be nice and extra affectionate so you would still like him.
-like you could be working on something and is critical about your work.
-"are you serious? tsk.. move, since you clearly cannot perform a basic task."
-then later he's like..
-"im glad someone on this ship is helpful, like you."
-basically, he purposefully plays with your feelings to get you to confess bc i feel like he likes when women cone to him.....
#mouthwashing#mouthwashing x reader#swansea x reader#swansea mouthwashing#daisuke x reader#daisuke mouthwashing#anya x reader#anya mouthwashing#curly x reader#curly mouthwashing#jimmy x reader#jimmy mouthwashing
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Intox Play Primer
Vet for high risk play. If you don't have the utmost trust in someone, control what you're putting in your own body and know where it all came from.
Check for interactions. Yes, this means sharing complete information about whatever medications the person getting drugged is on. No, the interactions are not always intuitive. Yes, this includes things like alcohol. Ideally, ask your doctor about interactions with whatever you're about to play with- they're trained in spotting interactions, you're probably not.
ETA- @vekarin-striae mentioned that pharmacists are often cheaper, more specialized, and less invasive to talk to about drug interactions.
If you've checked the interactions yourself, assume you might have missed something. Even if you've gotten your doctor to check, be aware they might have missed something. I once caught a potassium deficiency issue in someone's existing medication that their doctor prescribed them.
ROUND 1- Use it for its own sake before you play with it. Spend the time together and set yourself up for success: easy access to food, water, comfort media, and comfortable places to sit and lie down. Know how long it should last. Get someone who's used it before to tripsit if you can. Don't give yourself any tasks that involve new skills. Be ready to offer yourself or your partner a redirect from negative or anxious trains of thought.
Know what a good time on your drug physically looks and feels like. This is crucial, because things might go sideways in a way you're not expecting. Don't just be watching for specific signs of an overdose (though those are worth keeping in mind too)- if something seems wrong, get help. Seconds matter and you're probably not a professional.
Similarly: if the drug is at all sedative, or a downer, or long-lasting, and they're unconscious before it's out of their system, check for breathing and check for pulse. Also, your risk profile is your own, but I don't fuck around with hard sedatives- there's too fine a line between which body systems they shut down.
Start with a low-to-standard dose, and adjust doses for any relevant interactions (e.g. estradiol approximately halves liver tolerance [alcohol, weed, diphenhydramine], SSRIs approximately double psychedelic tolerance).
In order to avoid dependence issues, I wait a default of two weeks between recreational uses of any drug. (I only count caffeine here if I'm having more than two cups of tea in a day.)
ROUND 2- Play with it scripted and above board before you play with it in an explicitly cnc way. Your communication and mental state will have shifted, and you'll need to learn to accommodate that; make sure you try things out without added communication barriers first. Also, make sure to talk about how everything went afterwards when you're both sober!
If you're going to adjust doses, do it slowly and carefully. Most easily accessible recreational drugs can be incremented by half the standard dose. Some drugs are incredibly sensitive to fine adjustments; this is why Fentanyl, for example, is so dangerous and not recommended to use.
ROUND 3- Don't get comfortable. Try to have as peaceful and relaxed an experience as you want, and keep an eye on things as you play with different emotional states- but DEFINITELY continue to keep an eye on safety. It doesn't stop being a concern because you've done it once and everything went fine.
ETA- Mind how drugs affect things like pain tolerance! You might miss important signals from your body. Also, pay attention to overlap with your neurotype when planning and risk profiling. You might desire or achieve different effects depending on your own specific brain.
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Modern! Titus Brainstorm
Modern! Titus x Reader
S: Titus is a retired veteran who has served his country with nothing but due diligence. He struggles to navigate civilian life as his ptsd and depression have a grasp on him. His therapist recommended he try interacting with people in a public non-threatening setting and it leads to Titus finding a friend and love in an unlikely place. The supermarket.
W/n: This is not a story but more of an idea for a future story
W: PTSD, Abelist Thoughts, Depression, Titus being sad, Gn! Reader, cute slice of life kinda, TItus is around 40 something and reader can be read as being 20's to early 30 something, Age gap, a little Fluffy
He has to cut his hair short or else he feels like he's not well dressed. He also has to cut it like that because of his massive scar on his head thats ruined his hairline. He thinks he looks older because of it and he feels self-conscious over it when he's out in public. He remembered he once tried being polite to a woman who was only buying a few items and he told her she could cut in front of him. He smiled at her, trying to be nice but his lack of practice emoting made the woman uncomfortable and she grimaced at him.
He has these very deep depressive episodes where he'll clock onto his job but he wont do anything. He'll stay in bed and just cry or hyperventilate. Memories flood him from his service and he's trying his best to forget it all. He had medication but he doesn't like taking it since it makes him feel tired and he feels weak. His physical and mental strength were the things that made him valuable in the military and to lack that drove him crazy. He was discharged after a severe injury to his leg that made it so he couldn't run anymore. He walks with a limp but his pride wont let him not push himself to walk "normally" or buy a cane.
He works for a pretty big company as an analyst. He works from home and this was after his boss, Roboute, helped get the nerve to apply for the position. They had known each other briefly in the military but Roboute was not in active combat unlike Titus as he had an impeccable brain that the military deemed important enough to preserve. Roboute quickly left the military and began working for his own father's company as Director of Sales. He got Titus to apply and even gave him the ability to work from home so Titus could work without possibly being triggered and could make his weekly doctors and therapist appointments.
When he meets you he's all but enamoured by how different you are. You were a breath of fresh air, you looked about as normal as any person who hasn't done military service but it was the sadness in your own eyes that drew him to you. You were counting your money as you shopped, making sure you stayed in your budget as you made a decision on what you would eat for the next month on what looked like $40.
You both shopped so often at the same store that you both began a weird silent acknowledgment and then a friendship as you kept bumping into each other. He envied how you wore your own pjs to the store while he felt uncomfortable even existing in his own skin out in public. He once made a poor joke about your shopping habits and it made you upset to the point you stopped talking to him when you would both see each other at the store.
This made him panic as you were the only person outside of his boss to be kind to him or not look at him like he was a monstrosity. He apologized for his insensitive joke and offered to pay for you basket of items you had when he saw you. You accepted and from then on you both would just kind of meet at the supermarket to hang out. Sometimes you just showed up to talk to him. It was nice and it made him feel less anxious about expressing himself to other people. He began to feel this fluttering feeling in his chest whenever he saw you or got to spend time with you. Your laugh made his day feel brighter and his heart beat erratically.
#demetrian titus#demetrian titus x reader#titus x reader#w40k#demetrian titus w40k#titus w40k#warhammer 40k#warhammer 40000#warhammer#dd speaks
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