#someone tell me please??

[penny00dreadful]

I'm wondering if my Safety fic has been shared somewhere because the engagement on AO3 has gone wild in the last 24 hours and like I'm not mad, people are so nice but I'm a slut for validation so I NEED TO KNOW!

I pretty much exist only on tumblr and AO3, do I need to be elsewhere as well?? Somebody help a crotchety old bitch, please!

Edit: I ended up joining twitter 😅

[calcifershearts]

team usa shuffling away to try and let japan take a team photo with their gold medal and then shuffling back when japan is like NO COME BACK

[magicpiano]

DCXDP AU where Batman is one of the few survivors of the apocalypse from The Ultimate Enemy.

Danny meets Batman when trapped in the future and is shocked that Batman doesn't think he is too evil to be saved. Together they make a plan to stop his other self. Before Danny leaves, Batman gives him a secret code and tells him that if he needs help, he should go find Bruce Wayne.

Well Danny doesn't really plan on doing that, but after some event (his family dies again, a bad ghost reveal, the GIW, ect.) he finds himself running to Gotham.

Danny gets to Wayne Manor, gives the code word and says, "this is going to sound crazy, but I met Batman in the post apocalypse via time travel, and he told me to find you if I need help."

To Danny's surprise everyone immediately believes him. The kids take one look at him and know they have a new sibling.

[ghostdoodlen]

We've all seen baby man Danny doing crazy stuff like take over the world and become president, mayor, defeat cults, or become a pet.

So imagine the typical baby man Danny being adopted by the Batfam

But one of the bat kids having the bright idea of giving him dog buttons

Made a real quick animation

---

EDIT: There's no audio. Your device isn't trying to mess with you. You're supposed to decide what he's spamming.

Sorry if you went a little mad wondering what's wrong

There's just no audio to begin with

[datcravat]

It seems there's a new lawyer in town!!!

[aestas---estas]

Ghost would 100% be the type of person to go "no" when you ask if he can pass you the salt or the charger to your phone or whatever, staring at you with a blank expression while passing it to you.

He thinks it's peak comedy.

[inkskinned]

we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.

"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."

i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.

you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"

i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.

what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.

i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.

"don't make a big deal about this," you said.

this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.

"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.

you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."

the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.

afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."

[mother-giselles-hat]

Meanwhile, at the Cobbled Swan.

Inquisitor: things are terrible. We are Not doing well. We are persisting alongside the horrors, but make no mistake. The cost is high.

Rook: *furiously taking notes* mm hmm got it. Just one more thing before you go?

Inquisitor: ?

Rook: You can come out, Lucanis

Lucanis, sprinting in from the shadows: I heard you fought a wyvern.

Inquisitor: ??

Lucanis: *please* tell me about the wyvern

Inquisitor: Well...are you asking about the Hissing Wastes or Crestwood?

Lucanis: 🫨

[acetrappolad]

heartslabyul casual fits

[smollsmule]

Ok ok but you wanna know the real tea?? I've read several beach fics at this point (which are all awesome btw, y'all are amazing writers) and it's a beloved staple to have Edwin be somehwat scandalised at everyone's beach outfits not to mention all flustered from seeing Charles in swim wear. Which is a Good Trope, don't get me wrong, I love that just as much as the next person

HOWEVER

I think actually it's Charles who should be more shooketh about Edwin in his funky lil edwardian two piece!!

Picture this. The year is 1916. You are 16 year old Edwin Payne with a bunch of repressed gay thoughts. Much unpleasantness happens, you die and get dragged to hell, even more unpleasantness happens, 70 years later you finally manage to claw your way up and suddenly women are allowed to vote. There's been not one but two world wars, several countries you grew up reading about in the news don't exist anymore and mini skirts are a thing now.

All I'm saying is, for all the teasing Edwin gets for "What is a handjob?" and "Crystal's internet", this kid was essentially thrust into a scifi world full of weird shit and gets mostly by via an attitude which can only be paraphrases as "fuck it, this might as well be a thing (maybe ask Charles about it later)". King of adaption, master of radical acceptance.

Charles on the other hand, and I say this with only love in my heart, is at his core a boomer. He was there for every tiny gradual shift from '89 to modern day. Sure, he was dead for most of that time, but that's not really relevant. All I'm saying is, seeing the bbc announce marriage equality was probably a bigger shock to Charles than it was to Edwin. That's a guy who already had to accept he will never fully wrap his head around home television.

Also consider the states of undress they've been exposed to seeing the other in. Edwin was stripped to his underwear in hell and still had his knees and elbows covered. And that was probably a more exposing outfit than he'd ever be comfortable with. His usual casual get up features a sweater vest for crying out loud! Meanwhile you have Charles going full 'ceps out in his undershirt first chance he gets. Edwin either got real cool with a lot of shit real fast or he would have combusted several times over those 30 years.

And yes yes, we've all seen Edwin "Haunted By Gay Thoughts" Payne's mental slideshow of abs n hips close ups after getting one (1) glance at the Cat King's stomach. But to his credit, the man was going through a full blown sexuality crisis at that and has since emerged victorious.

So all I'm saying is. Edwin seeing Charles shirtless at the beach? Probably not even the first time this is happening, a lil flustering for sure but just last week he saw two people making out nasty on the tube so hell if he knows. Charles seeing Edwin's kneecaps and upper arms for the first time? Incredible, show stopping, pride and predjudice 2005 hand flex level of suppressed horniness.

Anyway. I'm writing this fic now and none of y'all can stop me.

[housederiva]

I think it’s kind of messed up how we only find out that Rook was stuck in the fade for weeks at the end of the game through Bellara’s romance path and it’s not mentioned anywhere else

[a-great-tragedy]

James: Hey Remus! What’s up? Wanna spend summer at my place?

Sirius: Nice jumper Remus!

Remus: *Internal monologue* They all hated me

[actual-changeling]

So, I was rewatching the kiss scene frame-by-frame, as one does, and I realized something. First I thought, well, Alex, you probably saw that wrong, let’s keep going. A minute later, however, I was confronted with the reality of no, not mistaken. 

Maybe I am late to the party and everyone has already seen it and knows about it, but in case there are people that haven’t: Aziraphale not only puts his hand on Crowley’s back, he puts his left one on his waist BEFORE that.

Not just that, he slides it up and also uses it as leverage to pull Crowley closer. I could go through those few seconds one frame at a time, but that would take forever, so I will give you the highlights in chronological order.

His hands flutter around at first and don’t settle anywhere, which is actually really useful since it shows us what the angle for that looks like.

Now, the next time his left hand moves up, look at the progression. It does not go down the same way as before. Instead, it moves inward and against Crowley’s waist. And it STAYS THERE right up until he moves both of his hands away.

Look at the angle!!!! Look at how it moves INWARD and towards Crowley instead of straight down like before.

Still moving towards Crowley with a slight downwards drift because he is aiming for his waist.

Now it is too low for us to see but I think it is very obvious where his hand has settled. Maybe I am going insane after only thinking about this show for almost a month straight. Maybe not. Call me crazy but the angle here is DIFFERENT. The second one very much looks like he is holding onto Crowley.

Aziraphale kisses back. Fully kisses back. Somehow, that wasn’t enough for Michael Sheen, no, he had to fully commit to it and *close his eyes* when he reciprocates, too. Look at this!!! The way his eyes flutter shut when Crowley first grabs him, then open, and then CLOSE AGAIN when he starts holding him in return. Kissing back with his eyes closed and his arms wrapped around him. The last picture is right before he moves his hand to his waist/the frame after the camera angle changes.

Anyone else losing it right now? No? Just me? That’s fine, although I most definitely am not. Fine, that is. Michael Sheen I’m sending you my fucking therapy bills.

[teaboot]

Social anxiety level: Chatting with someone experiencing a schizophrenic episode and becoming increasingly self-concious of how I'm just saying "That sounds really stressful", "I've never heard of that but it sounds scary", and "You must be pretty worried about that" over and over again

[ragsy]

big big big fan of found family relationships with shithead sibling dynamics

sure, yeah, they had no one in the world until they found each other, and they will fight tooth and nail for each other's safety, but they will also eat the last of the other's cereal and put the box back in the cabinet or tell the other's significant other every embarrassing story about them or greet each other by means of full body tackle and chokehold

[pixie-felix]

Lee Felix Definitely Doesn't Have a Mommy Kink.

Word count: 1.5k

Content: mommy kink, edging, tiny bit of bondage (just wrists), very mild dirty talk (because Felix is a good boy), begging, crying, hand job, blow job, cowgirl... I'm going to hell aren't I?

Heavily inspired by this by @emdaudied

Smut under the cut. Minors dni.

“I do NOT have a mommy kink.”

Felix is so cute when he pouts. Even when he's lying.

“That's not what you said last night…”

“It was ONE TIME.” You love teasing him so much. He turns such a pretty shade of pink, he's all glowy. Not even covering his face with his hands can hide it. “It was just one time.”

“It was literally last night.”

“I was distracted.”

“You were distracted… thinking about your mommy?”

The look of horror on his face as he realises what he just implied is… you wish you could to take a picture of it and hang it on your wall. You know Felix doesn't call his mother mommy, but that's not the point you're making here.

“You were thinking about your mommy last night, while I was riding you like a prize pony?”

He's like a fish out of water, gulping for air and looking a little more than mildly alarmed.

“It's okay baby, I don't mind. I can be your mommy if it gets you off…”

“I DON'T HAVE A MOMMY KINK!”

“...wanna prove that?”

Felix is so cute with hands tied above his head, a whimpering shivering mess as you deny him his third orgasm.

“Are you going to be a good boy now?"

Felix is always a good boy, but it's just so fun to make him beg for it.

“I'll be a good boy, I'm your good boy, I'll be such a good boy for you…"

His babbling stops with a help as you run a finger up his shaft, swirling around his weeping cockhead. His eyes wide and lips parted as he watches you gathering his pearly essence on your fingertip, holding it up to show him, before sucking your finger into your mouth.

His moan is music.

But you like it better when he uses his words.

“P-p-please baby, please baby, please baby just fucking touch me…”

The look of relief on his face when you decide to finally have mercy and start jerking him off properly. Between that face and the rock solid meatstick in your hand, the one that's brought you so much pleasure… it's enough to make you drip.

But no one likes a dry hand job, so you make sure to spit on his dick for lube before you start dragging your hand up and down. Noice and firm, the way Felix likes it best.

“Y-yes, yes, ye-esss, please baby just like that- don't stop, baby please don't stop…”

He's so desperate to cum. But he also never wants you to stop.

So he squeezes his eyes shut. He wants to watch you play with his cock, it's one of his favourite things. But he's not ready for this to end yet, so he has to deny himself the view of watching you pleasure him.

He's a mess.

Oh, the beautiful agony of edgeplay.

You love edging him, watching him get all sweaty, his hair sticking to his slick forehead as he writhes at your touch.

But you're a fully grown woman with needs of your own. And what you need, is Felix's dick. Preferably fucking you blind.

But before that, you've got a point to prove.

So you start working up the pace, quickening your wrist until you're going fast enough to make your arm start to cramp.

Felix is practically vibrating with the effort to keep still and not buck up into your hand. (Like the last three times, and the last three denied orgasms.)

“Keep still baby, you know the rules. Aren't you supposed to be a good boy?”

“I'm a good boy, I'm a fucking good boy, I'm your good boy-” Felix interrupts himself with a particularly beautiful moan, “I'll do anything you f-fucking say, I fucking promise, just please baby… please.”

He has been a good boy. He deserves a special treat.

his eyes snap open when he feels your lips around his cock, lapping at his slit. Crying out when you start digging your tongue into it. You should really get him a sounding rod.

Maybe for Christmas.

He's getting more and more desperate as you tease him with your tongue. From the way his hands are flexing in their restraints, you know he's fantasing about grabbing your head and forcing you down.

Making you take him nice and deep so he can fuck the back of your throat. Gagging around him, drowning somewhere between his dick and your own spit.

Well, his wish is your command.

Smacking sounds fill the room as you suck him down, making sure to make it messy.

“Oh god, just like that. Just like th-that. Feels so go-o-ood-”

It's amazing what a little drool can do to a man.

You speed up a little, cutting off his words mid sentence as his dick hits the back of your throat. You both love it when Felix is reduced to a whimpering mess by your touch, but today you're sucking him off with purpose.

You're going to make him say it.

It won't be long now.

He's so close to giving in, you know it.

He's biting his lips, trying so hard not to say it, but you know.

And when you start humming contentedly as his legs start to shake, you know that he knows you know.

“Mmm-mm-mmm…”

The obscene, wet pop as you release his dick from your mouth is almost drowned out by his cry.

And he is crying, looking at you with wide eyes, tears gathering at the corner as you sit up. Licking your lips like his salty precum is the most delicious thing you've ever tasted.

“Is there something you want, baby?”

“Mm-mm…” His moans are almost squeaky now. He's desperate for you.

You switch to his favourite position, moving so that you're on your knees, straddling him with just enough space that his dick is barely skimming your cunt. The tears start to fall, and he whimpers.

There's a reason cowgirl is a classic.

You take him in hand and slo-o-owly brush him up and down your folds, listening to his choked sobs as you coating him in your slick. Taunting him, teasing him. Showing him how fucking wet you are, as your juices run down his dick.

He breaks.

“M-mommy.” It's quiet, barely more than a whisper, but he said it. “Mommy.”

He's being too quiet. So you kick up the teasing a notch, lining him up with your entrance and pushing down just slightly. Just a little giving, but nowhere near enough to actually penetrate.

He knows what you want.

“Mommy, please.” You let him have a little more, lowering yourself onto his tip a fraction more, but he's being too quiet.

“Mommyyyy….”

Felix’s voice breaks. He knows he's lost, so there's no point holding back now.

“Use me mommy. Use me. Please.”

Well, how could you refuse?

You sink down, taking him balls deep in one fluid stretch.

Usually you'd take your time, savour the feeling of him stretching you out.

Teasing him, making him beg for you. Beg for you to to go a little faster, a little harder.

A little more “please mommy yes mommy just like that mommy mommy mommy moMMY a-aa-aaa-”

But today you're going to ride him like a prize fucking pony straight out the gate.

Fucking the cum out of both of you while Felix begs for it like the good boy he is.

“M-mommy please, p-please let me cum. Please let me cum mommy, I’ve been so good. I've been a good boy, I've been such a good boy, please let me cum mommy please let me cum…”

The faster you bounce, the louder he pleads.

“-please mommy please mommy please please please momMY PLEASE MOMMY PLEASE MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMM-”

He cums so hard you swear you feel him shoot through your cervix. Coating your insides white and sticky as he breaks out of his wrist restraints, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you down.

Squashing your tits against his chest, holding you bruise-tight as he ruts up into you, giving you absolutely everything as he tries to fuck you through his orgasm.

That's what sends you over.

You've been mean and unfair and teasing him for hours, but. Felix is a good boy who always wants to get you off.

Fucking you even when he's overstimulated and sore, until he finally feels you clenching around him, clenching around him hard as your orgasm hits you like a freight train.

It takes you both a few moments to recover, the room silent except for the sound of panting.

You try to detangle yourself, but Felix just pulls you closer, humming happily, his arms like a vice. Pulling you close like you're a blanket he wants to wrap himself up in and never leave.

He relents eventually, murmuring sweet things and cupping your face with his hands as you kiss him deeply.

He's a good boy.

“Such a good boy.”

“Mmm…” His after sex sounds are some of your favourites.

“...a good boy with a mommy fetish.”

Felix groans and hides his face in your neck.

“Shut up.”

this is a side blog so any reposts are appreciated, I will repay you in cake and pixie dust 🧚‍♀️

m.list