#someone pointed out that i got a timeline thing wrong here and you are absolutely right. im bad at real history and fake history

[aeoris4lovers]

thinking about verin having a little bit of paladin in him alongside being an echo knight.

his sense of honor and justice being his defining traits. his willingness to walk into a town that’s fighting a fight where a stalemate has been the best case scenario for as long as anyone can remember and saying “we’re going to win this.” him swearing to protect them and refusing to let his conviction be shaken even as the mounting threats weigh on him. his faith in the luxon being more based on ideals than religious belief, and how his commitment to those ideals must be genuine and not just blind faith, given that he can question them enough to understand why essek doesn’t feel the same. him being a “beacon of hope” for the people of bazzoxan, a light cutting through the darkness they’ve grown used to.

thinking about him, in the heat of battle, rushing to the side of a fallen soldier under his command, and a light suddenly reaching out from his hands to touch the soldier, closing their wounds just enough to keep them from fading away. him not knowing where it came from, keeping the powers close to his chest until he needs them most because he knows that people will talk, that they’ll make a big deal of him being “chosen” by the luxon when he doesn’t want to be a chosen one or even know if he believes that’s where they came from, and all he wants is to do his job well and protect the people under his care. thinking that maybe one day he can show them and get the respect and approval he craves, but not until he’s sure it won’t mean being whisked away from people who still need him.

i don’t know, i just think it would be fitting if he had a touch of paladin in him.

[jasperandhenryslovechild]

now that the shock of watching this trailer over and over and over again has worn down a tiny bit i need to ask, what the fuck is that hero costume and what does this mean for the preexisting canon dangerverse timeline

it is evident that these three costumes are NOT the same thing and it doesn't make me happy at ALL.

INDIVIDUAL BREAKDOWN/ELABORATION RAMBLE UNDER THE CUT

this one

is henry danger canon, like in the very last episode.

a muted version of the danger force canon one, with a fugly mustard hoodie with the strings tied so tight that it makes me question his breathing abilities and middle-schooler-who-just-discovered-what-mouse-is hair/j. he looks like he had to pull something together last minute unlike charlotte (curse me for cropping her out) who is literally THE COOLEST ONE HERE why is she not in the movie???? she is literally a fucking cyborg with purple hair someone explain this shit to me??? it's her superiority that allowed her to absolutely EAT THIS UP while henry looks like he just went dumpster diving

it's a vibe but it's also giving ramen noodles so im giving it a low 5/10 out of pity

danger force switches it up on us with this version

henry "we don't wear masks in dystopia, we're kinda above that" hart

this one is my favorite, it's cohesive and it goes together well. it's got the more grown hero vibe that ive always wanted to see in henry ESPECIALLY BECAUSE OF HIS GROWTH AS A CHARACTER!! THE RETURN OF THE KID EPISODE IS LITERALLY ALL ABOUT HOW FUCKING DIFFERENT HE IS AND IM HERE FOR IT SO HARD!!! i will absolutely drop a df henry hyper analysis some day but for now this is what we've got

the shades of burgundy and washed out red throw it together well and i can totally see an explanation behind this costume vs the old one being a simple upscale/revamp. that jacket has pockets to hide weaponry, leather would probably be a lot easier to take a tumble in (+ the knee guards not shown in this picture and like the plastic covers on the sides of his legs that i don't know the name of, implies that he takes enough hard falls to need protection in these areas!), it helps camouflage well in dystopia because the 2 seconds of clips we've seen of that place show that it's pretty dark despite its bright neon flashing lights that give it an evil sanfransokyo at night sort of vibe. it's superhero-y, but it also doesn't have all those staple childhood iconic hero things either— if anything he looks kinda ashamed to be in a superhero show and that's okay/j

overall, 10/10 because it has nothing to do with the capitan man/kid danger brand, it shows henry evolving beyond that point in his life into his own entity after being so soley dependent on ray for his entire previous career in superhero-ing

now to address this fucking monstrosity we were given just a few hours ago

i want to preface this by saying i am not ungrateful. the things i am about to say come from a place of pure dissatisfaction yet constructive criticism. ive been waiting years and years for this movie and i will literally take an hour and thirty minutes of jasper and henry twirling in a circle and make 183829992 edits of it i don't care, i love henry danger sm and the movie looks pretty cool

this being said

dear costume team of henry danger the movie,

have you ever watched henry danger and or danger force? do you even know what you're designing for? be honest, did the producers hand you this stock image

and tell you to make it mean? because every time i look at this costume there is something else wrong with it and it PAINS MY EYES. it makes him look like a cartoony ass space crusader instead of a hero fighting crime one of the most dangerous if not THE MOST DANGEROUS city in the world.

let's break this down, shall we? head to toe motherfuckers.

only not complaining about the hair and it being slicked in the same direction it used to be because it's consistent throughout the entire trailer (unlike SOME danger force episodes... cough cough return of the kid....cough cough.......)

that mask. firstly, i have issues with there being a mask at all, because danger force establishes that there are no masks in dystopia. nobody moves a finger to try and put on a mask, henry even fights SUNGLASSES. those sunglasses ray forces on him to hide his identity are brawled against, he's clearly grown out of masks. putting him back in one puts him back in that kid danger box he's been working hard to build up and out of, a concept established throughout the entire finale of henry danger and further reassured in danger force.

and if you were gonna inarguably give him a mask for simple minded audience recognition, nickelodeon, the least you could do was make it a PRETTY MASK. red was an.. okay choice for the base, but making the silver SURROUND IT? BLACK OUTLINE???? you're trying so hard to be new and cool and it is just painful on the eyes instead. the black eyeshadow under it makes him look like one of those 2020 emo dsmp cc edits and it's just like a throwback to an era nobody wants to go back to. that face card makes him looks like he listens to believer by imagine dragons while chewing that magic bubblegum. his lips are PALE, SOMEBODY GET THIS MAN SOME IRON— OH WAIT, THEY WASTED THEIR SUPPLY ON THIS NIGHT REFLECTIVE SILVER MAKEUP THAT MAKES HIM LOOK LIKE A STOP SIGN WITH A FLASHLIGHT UP IT'S ASSHOLE

then we move onto the base of the costume itself. firstly, the navy blue undershirt cut out to expose his neck says nothing to me. it does not make the statement you guys thought it would— in fact, it makes the whole thing look a pit incomplete? unkempt? it looks like theres something missing and with that black eyeshadow i think it's a thick silver chain SORRY IM DONE I'M OVER THE MASK

the vest over it gives me even more issues. you can't pull up with an audio of ray manchester going "you're not a sidekick anymore, you're a hero!!" and have THEIR FUCKING LOGO ON HIS CHEST. IT'S NOT RIGHT. ON TOP OF THE FACT THAT THE ENTIRE VEST IN AND OF ITSELF LOOKS LIKE IT WAS ROLLED IN DIRT AND HAS THE COLORATION PROPERTIES OF A DYING SEAL, THE LOGO BEING THERE AT ALL IS A MASSIVE ISSUE.

the entire POINT OF THE FINALE was that henry wanted to move on from his life as kid danger. he sacrificed himself and faked his entire death to thousands of people in order to become his own person. he had no life outside of crime fighting because he has no skills or traits outside of crime fighting— he gave up his entire childhood for it so naturally it's all he can gravitate to as he moves forward in dystopia. being a crime fighter once more is a punch in the face enough that he will never really escape who he once was despite the fact that HE GOT AWAY.

HE GOT AWAY.

in NO WORLD WOULD THE HENRY HART I KNOW AND LOVE PROUDLY WEAR THE SYMBOL OF THE VERY MAN THAT FAILED HIM. ray manchester failed him throughout his entire childhood— failed at giving him a normal kid life, failed at providing context and details before or even during the time he accepted the job— and yet here the movie is. he is wearing a rip off of his old costume in an attempt to leave behind who he was. that is ironic, that is HORRIBLE. because by putting him in this FUGLY ASS DOLLAR STORE COSTUME, not only are you retconning the evolution he's been working towards, you are denying him the right to become something greater than just kid danger

in the old costumes, the designs were different because he as a person was different. his entire character arc throughout the hd finale to now was just that, becoming different.

this is not different— this is just an older version of the ghost he's been leaving behind time and time again. dragging him back to his roots. there are millions of ways to drag him back to his roots in the movie itself because those roots will never free him, that is the entire point of him post henry danger and there's so many ways to show that. but changing his costume, one of the only parts of his new hero identity that he himself gets to choose, to resemble his old costume so similarly is just blatantly saying fuck you to the current dangerverse timeline and who that has made him out to be.

my final question is, what does that mean for everything else?

cause like, if the hd/df costumes are no longer a thing in the movie, what happened to them?? why did henry choose this bullshit over the FIREEE costumes in his past?? why would he ever do that to himself bro

and also BLACKOUT?? DO WE NOT GET AN EXPLANATION ON THAT???? BECAUSE EVEN NICKELODEON THEM FUCKING SELVES MADE A THEORY VIDEO ABOUT BLACKOUT BEING JASPER AND THEN WE PULL UP WITH THIS MOTHERFUCKER

LIKE GUYS I'M NOT GETTING IT ARE WE EVER GONNA GET AN EXPLANATION ON WHO BLACKOUT IS AND WHY HE WAS CAUGHT UP WITH HENRY— ALSO JASPER'S JUST TRANSFORMING RANDOMLY IN PUBLIC??? DOES THAT NOT NUKE THE ENTIRE PURPOSE OF HENRYS MASK?????

i do have very good things to say about this teaser, do not let your eyes deceive you, but i also have these complaints that i don't necessarily need answered if not I just need them to be heard

if you've made it this far thank you so much for coming to my insanely long ted talk

[l0vergirlatheart]

Can I request the jealousy reactions from the Victims of Mandela Catalogue? I read your other post of victims reacting to receiving affection my heart just absolutely soared. If it’s too complicated, don’t do it. :]

HOLY SHIT MY FIRST REQUEST!!! HIHIHI<333

ofcofc, if it's on my masterlist then I'll def. write it <3 love the victims frfr

also ty for the compliments, got me melting over here💕

c.w // jealousy (obv..), d/ckhead (?) in mark's part ngl, also really oblivious reader

JEALOUS MUCH?

start under cut.

MARK HEATHCLIFF

look at the goofy lil skrunkly

he doesn't get jealous easily

or in general

but...

if you're skipping or canceling hangouts with him just to see someone else constantly...

well, you'll see--

"Hey (Y/N)!" Mark called out behind you. You'd been walking around with (?), and he just happened to be close by.

"Hey Mark." You greeted with a smile as he jogged up to be by your side.

"Who's this?" He asked, pointing at (?).

"Ah! This is (?), my new friend! We've been hanging out a lot!" You exclaimed, and Mark nodded, smiling. But then, (?) locked arms with you and leaned into your side.

"Yeah, me and (Y/N) have been hanging out pretty much everyday this month, only besides the short 2 days when she was hanging out with you." (?) said, with a condescending smirk on their face as they stared down at Mark.

"..I see." He turned to look at you, "Is this the one who keeps having you cancel the hangouts?"

"I don't force (Y/N) to do anything, I think they just like a little better than you--" (?) started.

"I'm sorry? I don't like any of my friends more than the other!! You're all my friends, so I like you all equally!! Please don't pick another fight, (?).." You interjected. (?) just rolled their eyes and looked back at Mark.

"We've got somewhere to be right now, so goodbye." (?) said turning around and attempting to take you with them.

Mark grabbed you other arm softly and pulled you out of (?)'s arm lock, and silently lead you two away from (?).

yeah..

ya'll just left (?) in the middle of nowhere

oh well

skill issue

CESAR TORRES

go homosexual alternate go!!

yeah he's technically an alternate the entire timeline so...

he's one here too

since alternates don't usually feel, well, feelings

jealousy is new to Cesar

he has no idea why he gets that clenching feeling in his stomach when he sees you with (?), all close and even just slightly touching

and that voice telling him to just take you away from them is getting louder and louder

so what does he do?

he listens to it.

There you were, laughing with (?). You two had just gotten back from a fun time at a carnival in the next town over, and (?) was walking you home.

"Oh! Remember how scared you were on the Ferris wheel? Your face was priceless!" You laughed, covering your mouth with your hand.

"Oh, shut up!" (?) said, nudging you with their elbow.

"You know--" You started, but then (?) stopped moving and laughing. They were staring at something straight ahead in fear; you followed their eyes to see Cesar, standing ahead, just a couple feet away. The only thing that really scared (?) was that half of his face was missing besides his eye.

yeah safe to say your friend ran away

"why'd you--"

"I missed you."

yeah he took you away after that <3

away as in home

ya'll had a fun time there doing whatever it is you do with someone

idk i havent had human contact in years leave me alone /hj

JONAH MARSHALL

cute and goofy. perfect combo. just add in some stupid.

↑ recipe to make ur very own jonah

anygays

he is very goofy

so it seems impossible for him to get jealous right??

wrong.

he gets jealous very easily

and constantly tbh

he'll just pout at you and whoever he's jealous of

You were sitting at a restaurant with Jonah and (?). You and (?) had been chatting the entire time since they sat across from you, and the normally very loud Jonah was dead silent.

"Yeah so then I--" (?) started, but you stopped listening after a second because you felt something tug at your (shirt/sweater) sleeve. You looked next to you to see a pouting Jonah, with his cheeks all puffed out and goofy lil' mad face. <333

"How come you're not talking to me too??" He whined quietly, and you just had to let out a small giggle.

you had to let him in on the convo

he was back to normal in no time

when you guys left he was very clingy tho

no im not showing favoritism wdym

ADAM MURRAY

lets pretend adam wasnt a fr d/ckhead in the last volume ngl

he is chill

...sometimes

if he's woken up on the wrong side of the bed or sum

then he will get jealous quickly

not as fast as jonah but still

pretty fast

"Yeah so what movie did you want to watch?" You asked (?). You were at your house, and were going to have a movie marathon together.

"I was thinking.."

Little did either of you know, a groggy and grumpy Adam had entered the room, not have founding you anywhere in the other room with him.

"what're you doing?" he said, shocking both you and (?).

"HOLY SHIT ADAM-- You scared us!!" You said, whipping your head back to see him right behind the sofa.

"So?"

"sighh... we're having a movie marathon."

"Move over then, I'm joining."

he had his arms wrapped around you the entire time

silently pulling you closer and closer to him

he kept going 'till you two reached the edge farthest from (?)

poor (?)

they just wanted to watch movies

adam probably dragged you away to make popcorn with him lmfao

END

fandom masterlist

req. guidelines

[humbledragon669]

S1E3 – Hard Times Write Up P2 – The Globe Theatre London (1601) and the Burbage Meta

This part of the write up for episode 3 is going to take on a slightly different format, in that it will only be covering a very short (approx. 4 minutes) section of the episode. It will also contain the details of a meta-theory I have based on the short conversation that takes place in this scene, and I’ll be analysing the comings and goings of the scene in greater detail to try and demonstrate how the theory came to fruition. I’m not going to lie – this theory is likely to be HUGELY unpopular. I am not a fan of it myself but it’s where my head canon is at, and if it were true might explain one other unknown piece of canon. So, with all that said, let’s get started.

Before we get into the weeds, I’d just like to take a moment to appreciate the soundtrack for this scene. I’ve spoken before about David Arnold’s ability to compose incidental music of all manner of styles to assist with scene setting and the piece playing in the background here is no exception. The use of period instruments, simple orchestration and playful melody do an excellent job in establishing our place in the timeline. Chapeau, sir.

Alright, let’s get the ball rolling with some familiar ground, specifically the obvious joy on Aziraphale’s face when Crowley arrives.

Look at that happy little face! It looks like pure reflex too, he just can’t help himself. Did you appreciate that little suggestion that this is a happy couple on a pre-arranged date? Well hold on to it, because things are about to get rocky.

I’m going to skip ahead a little bit, but I will be coming back to look at some of the other interactions that take place here later on. I’ll mention (briefly) that this scene is the first we learn of the “Arrangement” actually being in place and that they have invoked it “dozens of times” (the book confirms it was originally enacted in 1020). It took me a little while to twig, but the fact that they do work on behalf of the other doesn’t just mean that Crowley is capable of blessing things and using his miracles for good (the latter isn’t so dubious – they both seem to use their miracles more like magic tricks anyway), but that Aziraphale is capable of tempting people into (bad) things. Food for thought.

When I first started looking at this episode with a mind to doing a write up for it, there was one of Aziraphale’s lines that stood out to me:

The reason it stood it is because it feels almost… lustful. And it shouldn’t because he’s not talking about Crowley here, but the actor on the stage – Richard Burbage. I dismissed it because I did not care for what that might mean for our precious darlings. That’s ridiculous, right? Aziraphale desiring someone other than the tall dark prince. Absolutely.

Time for a tangent.

After I finished writing Dangerous Liaisons (a 5+1 fix-it fic I wrote based on the theory that the entire Final 15 is all just an act), I found myself wanting to fill in some of the gaps that I had touched upon in the fic. There is mention of certain events, and of declarations of love on both sides, at particular points in their history, and my brain was already whirring about if I was to write them (spoiler alert: I am 100% going to write them), what the details were. One of those events takes place in 1941, which got me thinking about Aziraphale spitting out that he did the “I Was Wrong” dance that year. Which in turn got me wondering about what that dance would have been for. Which in turn got me thinking about what the other instances of the “I Was Wrong” dance in 1650 and 1793 could have been for, and eventually I was at the point where I wasn’t just planning to write more fics about the events mentioned in Dangerous Liaisons, but my versions of how those apology dances came about as well.

At the time, I had a notion that perhaps the 1941 dance had been done as an apology for Aziraphale’s outburst in 1862 about the holy water. Similarly, I had an idea that the 1793 dance could potentially have been about the fact that Aziraphale had (very stupidly) gone to France during a war against aristocracy, dressed in finery, for nothing more than crèpes. But the 1650 dance? I had no clue.

Until I went back to this scene.

What if. What if that lustful undertone I thought I had detected when Aziraphale speaks about Richard Burbage wasn’t nothing at all? Honestly, when my brain offered me that idea, it felt like fireworks had gone off in my head. Did I like it? FUCK NO. Did it make a weird sort of sense? Urgh, so help me, it kind of did. So hold on people, I’m going to say it quickly, because I am not enjoying writing it about as much as you aren’t going to enjoy reading it.

I think Aziraphale had an emotional affair with Richard Burbage.

I think not only did Crowley know about it, but that initially he gave it his blessing. I think Crowley changed his mind when he realised how much he was hurting as a result of it. I think Crowley tried to talk Aziraphale out of it under the pretence of not wanting him to feel the pain of heartbreak when Burbage inevitably died. I think they had a huge row about it. And I think the 1650 “I Was Wrong” dance was Aziraphale apologising for it all.

Hate me now? It’s OK if you do, I kinda hate myself for thinking it in the first place to be honest.

I know you’re probably thinking “well, what on earth were the 1793 and 1941 apology dances for then? If the original dance was for something as awful as an “affair”, what could he possibly have done in later years that would have been bad enough that the dance needed to be repeated?”. I know you’re thinking it because it’s exactly what I thought when my brain force fed me this theory in the first place. So here’s the thing.

I don’t think the dances in 1793 and 1941 were for anything different.

I think all three of the instances of the apology dances were for the same thing – Aziraphale’s emotional affair with Richard Burbage. Because it’s the one thing Crowley can secretly never forgive him for, even though he gave him permission to do it in the first place.

I suppose I had better start talking to explain myself here, shouldn’t I? Well, alright then, I will, but only about my reasoning for the theory – the playing out of the dances I will be writing about in my fics.

Let’s start with the little glance at Burbage we see from Aziraphale when Crowley says he hates the ”gloomy” Shakespeare plays:

I’ve slowed it down so that you can see it, but Aziraphale’s primary concern about Crowley’s criticism is whether or not Burbage has heard it – that’s where his gaze initially goes to before being distracted by an approaching Shakespeare.

OK, OK, a single glance and a single line of script. That’s hardly a confession, is it? Well, I’m not done yet. Let’s have a look at Aziraphale falling over himself to reassure Burbage of his talents.

This sort of gushing simper is something you might usually see from a teenage girl trying to bolster the older boy she has a desperate (and inappropriate) crush on, often when responding to an attempt by him to fish for compliments or show the younger girl up. It makes me a little sick at just how desperately Aziraphale offers his support here to be honest. My feelings aside, his babbling flattery wins him Burbage’s attention, which clearly delights the angel.

I’m sure most people would be happy to believe that the reason Aziraphale denies his friendship with Crowley is because that is the standard for them both, but I think there’s more to it than that. I’m of the mind that Burbage and Aziraphale already know each other at this point, and that they’ve already begun to develop feelings for one another. Burbage asking Aziraphale about his “friend” isn’t just a general question - it’s tinged with jealousy. He wants to know who this man is, not in an attempt to garner more compliments, but because he’s feeling threatened by his presence. As well he should. Let’s also take a look at Aziraphale’s face after Crowley’s presence has been pointed out:

Does it look familiar to you? It does to me. It’s the face he pulls when he’s in trouble for doing something he knows he should be in trouble for. Just like when Nina drops him in the shit with Crowley for having a naked man in his shop:

We can also see Crowley starting to cotton on to things in this little exchange. He sees Aziraphale’s desperation and flustering, sees the human’s jealousy and possessiveness. So what does he do? He does what any self-respecting mischief-loving demon would do. He decides to join the pissing contest. You can see his decision in his expression here:

If that expression wasn’t enough to let you know that he’s entering the ring at this point, his dismissive response to Burbage’s challenge should be enough to tell you he now considers this man fair game.

I think you should get on with the play.

Ouch. Saucer of milk, Crowley? Or maybe just turn your disdain to the person you’re actually upset with? Ah, he’s got that covered, showering Aziraphale with sass when he heckles Burbage. You can see a little train of emotions going through his expression here – amusement morphs into shock and disbelief, finally indicating his incredulity with a head shake so subtle you can only just catch it in the movement of his hair.

Quick side note: in the script, Burbage gives Aziraphale a “grateful thumbs up” at the heckle. Very friendly, don’t you think?

And so we come to the hateful fateful line that got us into this mess in the first place.

He’s very good, isn’t he?

And now it takes on a whole different level of meaning, doesn’t it? This is him asserting his pride at Burbage’s talents, justifying his feelings in a thinly veiled confession, and subtextually seeking approval from the one person in the world that he would ever want it from.

Let me be clear: I do not believe that Aziraphale is sexually attracted to Burbage, or that he’s in love with him. I think he feels a deep emotional attraction to him and there isn’t a doubt in my mind that Burbage’s talent is what’s really driving it. It’s worth remembering that Richard Burbage was a real historical person, who was the resident actor at the Globe Theatre. He played virtually every major role in the company, and it is generally thought that the role of Hamlet was written for and based on him. He was possibly considered the greatest actor of his time.

Crowley’s response, which comes after a tiny pause, seems oddly out of character.

Age does not wither nor custom stale his infinite variety.

For those who don’t know, this line is an almost direct quote from Shakespeare’s “Antony and Cleopatra” (written after 1601, hence why Shakespeare makes a note of it when Crowley speaks). It’s spoken by Enobarbus, Antony’s best friend, who acts as a reasoned counsellor to Antony, offering advice unbiased by an all-consuming infatuation with Cleopatra. The pronouns have been changed in Crowley’s rendition (the resulting line in the play is about Cleopatra, so “his” becomes “her”). I have no doubt that Crowley’s subtext is pretty thickly layered here, so I’m going to try and break it down a bit:

We have a reference to age not having an effect on appearance. This is pretty obviously a characteristic of both himself and Aziraphale, immortal beings as they are.

The second half of the line he delivers is a reference to the subject having a range of moods that are unpredictable in their application.

The line as a whole takes these two ideas and wraps them in the suggestion that the subject is overwhelmingly attractive to many.

So taking all of that into consideration, I believe that the subject of Crowley’s line here is Aziraphale. He’s the one who doesn’t age, who is unpredictable and has fickle moods. It’s a reminder to himself of the things he finds attractive in Aziraphale and why others might also be drawn to him. It’s his admission that in this situation, he must be Enobarbus, the advisor, but that one day he can resume his role as Antony to Aziraphale’s Cleopatra. I mean, where else do we think he gets his 20th century first name from anyway?

That was a lot of analysis for a tiny handful of words. Aziraphale is less impressed with them, presumably because his little crush’s talent has not been recognised and he didn’t get the approval he was looking for.

The conversation that follows lets us know that Crowley has called this meeting. What’s interesting though is that according to Crowley’s opening line of the scene, it would appear that the location choice was Aziraphale’s.

I thought you said we’d be inconspicuous here.

This would suggest that Aziraphale knew that Burbage was going to be displaying his talents and that it would give him ample opportunity to show him off. Poor Crowley has been completely ambushed.

The majority of the conversation after this point is largely business-related, but it doesn’t stop Aziraphale from returning his eyes to Burbage at every opportunity, who is relentlessly charging through his lines in the background. Interestingly, the only line we focus on him for is this “the pangs of despised love”, which refers to the heartache caused by love that ends badly. And what other way is there for the affair between him and Aziraphale to end but badly? He’s human. He’s going to die. Leaving Aziraphale heartbroken. The frame just before these words are delivered would suggest that Aziraphale isn’t actually paying attention to him when he says them (shocking), so he’s probably missed that particular point entirely.

It's touching to see that Aziraphale does still care for Crowley, despite whatever else might be going on in his brain – his main concern, at least on the surface, is that it could put Crowley in danger if they invoke the Arrangement. In truth, I think he’s also considering the possibility that he might get to stay in London to spend more time with Burbage if he doesn’t have to go to Edinburgh; it’s written all over the lingering gaze he shoots the actor’s way when he’s offered the change to “toss for Edinburgh” (*smirk*)

And just look how disappointed he is when he loses:

And as if Aziraphale had not asked enough of his demon already, he overhears a conversation between Shakespeare and the oyster vendor (named Juliet, wonder if old Bill stole her name for anything he’d written previously…), prompting him to ask Crowley for a favour. I don’t think this could be interpreted as anything other than a secret gift from Aziraphale to Burbage. He obviously thinks it’s a marvellous idea and has set his heart on having it – just look at his silent ask of Crowley:

If that little eyebrow raise looks familiar, it’s because exactly the same micro-expression we see when he silently asks Crowley to clean his jacket in episode 2:

Let’s just for a moment say that my theory about all of this is complete guff. Why would Aziraphale be so desperate for Hamlet to succeed? Why this particular play? I’m prepared to settle and say the reason he doesn’t do the miracle himself is because he’s just lost the toss and is about to go and do Crowley’s job for him, but I can’t work out why he would be so keen for this play to succeed if there wasn’t some sort of emotional attachment involved with its lead actor and inspiration. So, I’m sticking to my guns on this one. Note: I’m not going into any metafiction stuff about both David and Michael having played Hamlet to high acclaim – everything here stays strictly within the GO universe.

And, like the lovesick little puppy that Crowley is, he gives his heart’s desire what it desires, even though it isn’t him. He even calls it a “treat”, and it earns him a pretty sweet smile of gratitude.

I don’t believe that Crowley’s gesture here is without subtext. I think this is him giving Aziraphale the approval he was fishing for earlier. And Aziraphale knows it – his secondary response (after that big soppy grim) is one of delighted relief. I have no doubt that Crowley is smarting a little by this point, and that’s borne out by the fact that he now leaves the theatre alone. If we look at the ends of each of the historical scenes, there are three where one of our hero couple leaves without the other (I’m not counting the departure in 537 AD where they both leave simultaneously). One is in 1862 (where Aziraphale refuses to supply Crowley with holy water) and another in 1967 (which I obviously haven’t covered yet) where Aziraphale leaves after delivering his soul-destroying “you go too fast” revelation. The other is this one. It’s seems very fitting that the only scenes where we see one of them leaving without the other are scenes where there is emotional tension between them. More importantly for this scene though is not so much that Crowley leaves, but that Aziraphale stays, his gaze instantly returning to Burbage on the stage. Not only is his face still fixed with a soppy smile, but he resumes eating – something we will see him using as a flirting device with Crowley in future years.

There’s one last thing I want to talk about from the beginning of this scene that I think bears mentioning:

Setting aside the fact that he miracles a coin out of thin air right in front of a human’s face here, there’s something else that draws my attention. The vendor in this micro-scene gives a customer two choices: oysters or oranges. Aziraphale chooses a third option, that we as the audience are not aware is available: grapes. Is it too extreme to consider this to be foreshadowing the choice that Aziraphale will make in this scene? As an entity, we have seen him try to choose between Heaven and Crowley for centuries, but here he will instead choose a third, previously unknown, option – Richard Burbage.

So there we have it. If you’ve stuck with me this far, I really do congratulate you. And I’m sorry. I’m not exaggerating when I say that writing this all down was actually really hard to do. I don’t want any of what I’ve theorised here to be true as much as most of the GO fandom, but once the idea planted its seed I could see how much sense it made.

If you’re still reading, and don’t hate me too much, I’ve written the prologue and first chapter of the fic that goes with this meta (you can find it here). I’ll be writing the second and third chapters covering the other “I Was Wrong” dances once I’ve completed the analysis for their relevant scenes, though that does mean the 1941 chapter will be a little while in the making.

Not sure I really want to include my usual sign off here, but… questions, comments, discussion always welcome. (Please don’t throw too much abuse at me!)

[inkblackorchid]

What the hell happened with Crow: an autopsy (Part 3)

Trying my absolute damnedest to finish this one and part four sooner now that I've finally covered the Pearson backstory. *Ehem* Hello again! I hope you're ready for more yelling about a certain spiky-haired Blackbird aficionado, because I sure am.

To get some things out of the way first, though, here come the usual disclaimers:

This is part three of a series of posts about hpw Crow's character was handled during 5Ds' whole run. You can find part one here and part two here. Reading them technically isn't required, but things sure will make a whole lot more sense if you do. (Bring snacks, they're long.)

This post isn't meant as a Crow hate post, nor is it meant to convince people who didn't vibe with his character to change their mind. This is my very long winded-attempt to analyse the writing decisions surrounding his character as best I can, without too much bias. That said, full disclosure, I do personally like Crow, so there's a good chance that will shine through whether I want it to or not. But also, I'm trying to have fun here, so please cut me some slack.

In case you haven't read my previous Crow posts (no shade there) and/or still believe the many, many production rumours that have been haunting the 5Ds fandom since the show's original run, please let me burst your bubble(s) with some insanely comprehensive research by someone over on Reddit (thanks again to @mbg159, who's also here on tumblr): No, Crow was not meant to be a dark signer, or the final boss of season 1, and his spike in screentime has nothing to do with his cards. And also, No, Aki didn't get less presence in the narrative because her VA got pregnant. What if you don't have the time to read either of those long posts? In that case, please take away this simple, very easy rebuttal of why the above theories are bullshit: Their would-be "key points" don't line up with the 5Ds production timeline. At all. Not even vaguely. So please, ditch them, let them die, seeing them still talked about makes me feel like I'm gonna break out in hives. And for the love of god, don't use this post or in fact anything else I post to pit Aki and Crow against each other. Both characters have their strengths and their reasons to love them. I am not the least bit interested in starting any character discourse. So please, spare my sanity. Ok? Thank you.

And now, we can get to the good part at last. In my previous post in this series, I stopped my analysis at episode 95, a.k.a. part two of the Pearson backstory. In this post, I will thus be picking up right after, at the very start of the WRGP—with the Team Unicorn match. The goal for this post is to analyse Crow's part in this particular arc, then provide some food for thought/ideas on how things that rubbed some people the wrong way could have been improved.

More below the readmore, and I give you not just my usual warning, but an extra warning, too: The universe will not let me write short things, so tread with caution, stay hydrated, and expect a veritable dissertation below, because this post feels long even to me, who has long since lost her sense of length when it comes to text. (But I'm well aware this is the result of me refusing to split the WRGP part into two separate posts, so I take full responsibility for that.)

Since we left off right after I chewed through all the issues with Crow's rather belated backstory and especially Black-Winged Dragon last time, we jump right into the thick of things now, with episodes 96 and 97, which serve as the preamble to Team 5Ds' first WRGP duel against Team Unicorn. Crow only gets two major things to do during this short stretch of episodes, the first being that he's Team Unicorn's gateway into roping Yusei into a duel during practice, which helps them set up a ruse that baits the 5Ds gang into sending Jack as their first wheeler because they think Jack's deck is best suited to countering Andre's—which, as it later turns out, it is not.

(Arguably the screenshot where Crow gives off the strongest Youngest Sibling Vibes during the entire show. Look at him, all chastised.)

Crow's second role is an odd one that I argue only he out of the main three guys could fulfill at this point: He's the one to get injured right before the Team Unicorn match, rendering him unable to compete, which leads to Aki offering to take his place for that particular match.

(Pictured: Bird Boy regretting all his life choices up until that point simultaneously.)

Here's the first moment I have to talk about in greater detail. See, the thing is, I don't know what the fandom consensus on Crow getting injured here is, but I argue that this moment was a (rare) strategic decision made by the writers at this point. Crow's injury accomplished several things: 1. It sets up the mystery of why his back wheel locked up out of nowhere, which is later paid off through Team Catastrophe's shenanigans. 2. It organically allows Aki to take his spot without introducing any argument about which of them is "worthier" of having that third spot. 3. Through this, it also allows him to actually bounce off Aki for once (a point I will come back to below, during the Team Catastrophe section). And 4. It allows the show to (TECHNICALLY) pay off the setup they did in letting Aki get her turbo duelling license and train with the boys. (Generally, Crow's and Aki's character writing intersects a bit during the pre-Diablo incident WRGP section, something I'll touch on below.)

Moreover, I think this is also the only match where they could have done something like this, and the reason for it is very simple: Team Unicorn are one-off opponents whose presence in the narrative is only relevant as far as it concerns the WRGP, and they are also one of the first teams the 5Ds gang faces. If we think about the opponents Team 5Ds has after this, it becomes very obvious why Crow could only be injured during this duel: If they had tried pulling this stunt later, it would have forced the writers to pull Aki centre stage during a much more plot-relevant duel than this one (which they were apparently allergic to, but let's not go there), not to speak of the fact that it would have forced them to sideline someone they were definitely trying to sell as the third portion of their protagonist trifecta, which would have probably been awkward. (If not for the fact that they literally did this to Crow later in the show, but I'll get there. Yes, I know there's a lot already that I'll still be "getting to".)

The thing is, whether or not it feels like an awkward writing choice to make so early in the big tournament of this arc (you be the judge of that), Crow's injury finally allows him to have a few interesting character moments for once. For one, there is his immediate disappointment about being forced to stay on the sidelines. Aside from the fact that this is a human and relatable reaction to his injury, it stings even more for the character than it does for us as the audience, because Crow got a moment where the Satellite orphans he previously took care of cheer him on for the tournament literally within the same two Team Unicorn preamble episodes.

(Say what you will, this is just stupid cute.)

So when Aki eventually offers to take his place during the match, he's understandably apprehensive—and again, this is human. It may seem mean in the moment, but from a character writing standpoint, it's a natural response. Plus, it's certainly more interesting to watch the group have a bit of conflict among themselves, rather than everyone immediately jumping straight to acceptance. It introduces tension, and, for however brief a moment, raises the question of whether Crow might refuse to let Aki take his spot. This is also the point where Aki and Crow's character writing officially intertwines, at least for the stretch of episodes between the Team Unicorn duel and the Team Catastrophe duel. And you know what? Say what you will, but I think it does a world of good for both of them. The 5Ds cast, as lovely as it is, doesn't get a lot of room to bounce off one another where it concerns personal matters anymore, once the WRGP starts. Arguably, they get little time to bounce off one another outside of plot-related discussions at all once this portion of the show comes around. The characters are treated as "fully developed", and thus, the writing largely doesn't take the time to show us how the group naturally interacts with one another anymore, especially not with how many side characters (chiefly Bruno and Sherry), antagonists, and duels the show now has to juggle. So Aki and Crow getting even a smidgen of personal conflict here is honestly a breath of fresh air. The interaction kicked off by Crow's injury isn't completely plot-irrelevant, like most character interactions during the pre-WRGP were, but it's not something that feels like it's only there to explain the machinations of the antagonists to the audience, either.

Let me go through this in a little more detail to illustrate my point.

So, episode 97. Crow storms off after Aki offers to take his spot, while Aki heads out to prepare her runner, intent on helping her team. The personal motivations here are already very nice and reflective of these characters as we've gotten to know them up until this point: Crow's angry and disappointed (mostly at himself, which is noteworthy!) because he can't compete. And specifically, he's angry because not being able to compete in the first match means he can't show the kids his duelling like he wanted to. Then there's Aki, whose offer to take Crow's place is every bit as much of a strategic suggestion as it is a bid for acceptance from her. Acceptance, which is the thing she's been all about ever since she was introduced, basically. So she pleads with her friends to accept her, see her as an equal, and allow her to duel for the team, which they do. And Crow initially throws a fit, but then...

(Listen. You have no idea how much Crow and Aki getting to actually be friends means to me.)

He comes around to the idea and not only gives Aki his express permission to take his spot, he even coaches her a bit right before the match. Moreover, as his text states above, he literally entrusts her with the kids' hopes, as well as his own. This quickly brings both of them full circle: Crow, who already has a theme of legacy attached to him, passes the torch to Aki for this match, and in so doing, offers her the acceptance she asked her teammates for. (Frankly, stuff like this makes me wonder why on earth people were so eager to pit these two against each other, when their shared moments are actually some of the best-written during the often rocky WRGP arc.) So, though this injury pulls Crow out of the duel, it, funnily enough, ties him better into the story and to the other characters.

From there, we then dive into the Team Unicorn match proper. And well, being injured as he is, Crow doesn't exactly get a whole lot to do there. However, since we're in the portion where his and Aki's writing overlaps a bit, I do need to go on a quick tangent about what Aki's portion of this duel means for Crow.

(Sigh. Okay, buckle up for a quick and rough detour.)

First, something I need to get out of the way and off my chest: I have made no secret out of the fact that I hate Aki's portion of this duel, save for the moment where she summons Stardust. Hell, this duel segment is pretty much universally hated by anone who has even a smidgen of sympathy for Aki. It's regarded by many as the very moment the writers axed Aki's character, and for good reason: After all the buildup surrounding her getting her turbo duelling license, the supposed "payoff" of it all is that she gets to duel against Andre for a depressing four turns before being defeated immediately, which leads into Yusei's frustrating portion of this duel, which, to my knowledge, isn't regarded any more kindly by fans than Aki's segment. It's a massive let-down, simply put. But the thing is, it's not just a let-down for Aki. After all, the brief character conflict she had with Crow about taking his spot here can and should be regarded as part of the setup for this moment, and as such, it can also be considered to be wasted the second Aki leaves the track after barely making an impact whatsoever.

However, I do need to mention that I have a theory on why this segment was handled the way it was, mostly because I feel like Crow's later interaction with Aki, shortly after she's out of the duel, underlines it (mind that this is just my personal theory, though, after having watched the show perhaps more times than can be considered sane): I think there is a cultural aspect to this duel. See, the word ganbaru, which anime subtitles often like to translate with "do your best" or something along the lines, has a greater significance than the translation implies. Though it's not inaccurate per se, there's more than just the idea of doing your best behind ganbaru, because it's something like an umbrella term not just for doing your best and succeeding, it's also the idea that you have to keep trying, even if you don't succeed. It's related to tenacity, to persistence, even in the face of terrible odds. And make no mistake, I don't mean the Japanese equivalent of "if at first you don't succeed, try again" here. I genuinely do mean "you have to keep trying, even if you fail". There is no guarantee of success here. And for that reason, the idea behind ganbaru is also that it's not simply the success that has value, but the effort made in the attempt to attain it, regardless of the result. (Side note: I tried to scrounge up a resource I could link to that nicely explains this concept, but unfortunately, all the promising articles were paywalled and the ones I learned it from require institutional access to lecture materials.) And this is where I will posit the tentative theory that this is exactly what the 5Ds writers were going for with Aki's segment of the duel—it was very much meant to be the payoff for her turbo duelling license setup and her plea to take Crow's place, but it wasn't so much her success that was meant to be valued, as the effort she (and by extension, Crow) made for and during this duel. And this is where Crow's little pep-talk with Aki after she's out of the duel comes in, because it feels like it supports exactly this interpretation:

(This is essentially the whole sequence. Note how Crow, despite so fervently entrusting Aki with his and his kids' hopes prior, doesn't admonish her for making a bad showing in the slightest.)

I don't think it gets any clearer than it is here. During this sequence, Aki is painfully aware of how poor her performance was against Andre, especially after she was so insistent on duelling at first, and despite having been entrusted with Stardust by Yusei, to boot. Yet, Crow doesn't have a single word of criticism to offer her. Instead, he even tells her she did well and that nobody's perfect. It very much reads as valuing Aki's effort over the result she achieved to me, and thus seems perfectly in line with the idea behind ganbaru.

However, if we assume I'm correct about the intentions behind this writing choice, we come back to why Aki's segment of the duel is so hotly debated and why it may have arguably been a disservice not just to her, but to Crow, too, character-wise. Because the majority of non-Japanese watchers of the show culturally don't have a 1:1 applicable concept like ganbaru, this writing choice was more likely to fall flat for them, because to someone who wasn't raised to understand the idea behind it, Aki's portion of the duel doesn't register as a payoff; it registers as a massive disappointment, because it feels like the writers, who had so much setup already done for her, let her fail on purpose, just to later let Yusei attain his arguably dumbest victory of the entire show. Thus, they also essentially waste the conflict she had with Crow about whether she would be allowed to take his spot in the first place, because with how little she achieved during the duel, she may as well not have gotten on the track. (Figuratively speaking. Please Do Not take this to mean I would prefer a version where Aki hadn't duelled at all. That would be worse. It would be infinitely worse.)

(Also, side note: If this post reaches anyone who's actually Japanese and still remembers this duel, I would genuinely love your input on whether my interpretation is feasible or just wishful thinking. Did you interpret Aki's part of the duel the way I did here? Or did it fall flat for you, too? If what I'm saying here feels like an absolute reach, please tell me. I'm honestly just trying my best to make things make sense here and remembered this concept from some classes I took in Japanese studies at uni.)

With all that in mind, it doesn't come as a surprise that some people were just as frustrated with the way Crow was barred from duelling here as they were with Aki's segment or Yusei's later victory. But it is what it is—the Unicorn duel concludes the way we all know it to, and with that, the show begins setting up the following duel with Team Catastrophe.

The only other, non duel-related, noteworthy thing that happens between the Unicorn and the Catastrophe match is a brief appearance at the Poppo Time by Sherry, who admonishes the signers for celebrating their victory early and warns them about Iliaster. Why do I bring this up? Because it's one of less than five times that Crow is in the same room with Sherry. Remember, Sherry. The girl he later, during the finale, talks out of working for the big bad evil guy because he suddenly seems to have such a deep understanding of her motivations and character that he can accurately deduce what argument will make her understand that working with Z-ONE won't give her what she's looking for. So, does Crow get a meaningful interaction with her during this scene, then? Nope. Not even in the slightest. Crow says exactly one sentence that is aimed at Sherry during her appearance, and that sentence is this:

(What a meaningful conversation!)

And yes, I will come back to Crow and Sherry's dynamic in particular. But we'll save that for the Ark Cradle arc post. For now, just keep it in mind as we move along to the other WRGP duels.

So. Team Catasrophe.

During the duel against this team, which was previously only hinted at ominously, the writing for Crow and Aki overlaps again, and this starts with the writers essentially doing a complete switcheroo of what came before: Instead of Crow getting injured and being unable to compete, it's Aki who crashes, ends up in the hospital, and is thus forced to give up her spot during the duel. (This also goes hand in hand with her suddenly losing her powers, which we are given absolutely zero explanation for, but let's not talk about that clusterfuck here. If you're interested in my opinions about that particular trainwreck, I have a rant for you.) Additionally, it's during this stretch of episodes (103-105, which is a whopping four episodes less than Team Unicorn got) that we find out that not only Aki's crash, but Crow's previous one, too, were both sabotage, caused by the rather unscrupulous Team Catastrophe by way of a special card that can cause real damage even when there is no psychic duellist present. (A card we also find out was given to them by Placido/Primo, but this is irrelevant for both Aki and Crow.) Crow's reaction to this piece of information, particularly once Aki gets injured due to the same thing, is where things get interesting for him again, because he gets pissed, to say the least.

(A moment I imagine firebirdshippers must have been positively delighted about.)

Here, I have to reiterate an earlier point: Think what you will of Team Catastrophe, of Aki's crash, and of the sequence where her powers suddenly don't work, but this moment here, where Crow gets angry on her behalf and swears to duel Team Catastrophe into submission—not because he wants his kids to cheer for him, or because he wants to prove himself, but as revenge for his friend—is one of sadly only a handful of moments the writers use to show the strengthened relationships between the individual members of Team 5Ds after the dark signers arc. It's one of the precious few scenes that actually shows, rather than tells us or lets us search for scraps in the subtext, that the signers, and the members of Team 5Ds as a whole, care for each other outside of revolving around Yusei like planets around the sun. Even if it's laughably small, it's at least a hint that there are individual friendships between the other signers, too, that they all stick around one another for reasons beyond gravitating towards Yusei for one reason or another. And for that alone, I'm grateful that they put this here, even if Team Catastrophe was otherwise so ridiculous and made such a bad showing at their actual match that they could barely be taken seriously as antagonists at all.

Speaking of which. The actual meat of the matter. The Team Catastrophe match. What does Crow do here? Well, he duels! Even though he wasn't supposed to, for injury-related reasons. What both his participation as well as the actual duel accomplish, though, are that they not only showcase previously established character traits of Crow's again, but they also make a (possibly unintended) callback to a previous, major duel Crow took part in: His dark signer duel against Bommer/Greiger. Where and how? Let's see.

Firstly, Crow's participation. The reactions of the other characters to this make it very evident that Team 5Ds did not plan for this, with Yusei and Jack even going as far as to say they "had no choice" but to let Crow duel, because he insisted. This is perfectly in line with the stubbornness we already know from him at this point—a stubbornness that was also a major reason for why he took Bommer on and later continued his duel with said man, despite Yusei showing up and telling him he shouldn't be duelling a dark signer.

Secondly, there's the manoeuvring thing, and here's where I can call attention to a fun tidbit: The WRGP isn't what introduces the concept of manual mode during turbo duels to the audience. It's Crow. During his duel with Bommer. Being crafty and a bit shrewd as he is, Crow, during said duel in the DS arc, purposefully switches to manual mode when he duels Bommer, because he figures that attacks that can deal real damage can probably be evaded if you actually have control over your runner and aren't stuck in autopilot.

(Don't believe me? Here it is. And frankly, it is somewhat hilarious, yet also very fitting that Crow is the only one who thinks to do this during a duel with a dark signer.)

The reason this particular bit is relevant during the Team Catastrophe duel is because Crow essentially repeats this trick here. Of course, it's a bit less impactful now, given that manual mode is standard for WRGP duels, but still: Due to Hook, the Hidden Knight, Crow is forced to pay attention to the track and manually evade the monster's attempts to make his back wheel lock up during the duel, mirroring how he thought to manually evade Bommer's attacks during the DS arc.

Thirdly, there's the revenge angle, and this one is a particularly juicy callback. Remember, Crow's major reason for taking on Team Catastrophe, despite being injured, is that he wants to get revenge for Aki. This directly parallels how his major reason for duelling Bommer during the DS arc was that he wanted revenge for his kids, whom he believed to be dead at that point in time. (It also, interestingly, establishes a bit of a connection to his deck, which boasts a fair amount of revenge effects, but I'll not get into that here, seeing as I've talked about Crow's cards a bit before.)

Keep in mind, despite all the things listed above that this duel accomplishes, it's also by far the shortest WRGP duel. It lasts a whole six turns, total, which is ludicrous compared to the likes of 27-turn Team Unicorn, 26-turn Team Taiyou, or 25-turn Team Ragnarok. And I don't think it's controversial to say that the Catastrophe guys are probably the most forgettable WRGP Team, too. Yet, somehow, despite all its shortcomings in terms of memorable antagonists and plot relevance, this is one of the best duels of the WRGP where Crow's character writing is concerned. Now, I'll be perfectly candid: Coming into this post, I did not expect the Team Catastrophe duel, of all things, to end up being as good at actually showcasing Crow's character and his ties to other characters (who aren't Yusei) as it was, but here we are. And we had better hold on to the good the Team Unicorn - Catastrophe segment did for Crow, because the next thing that's coming up is a harsh break from the WRGP, starting with the sudden appearance of Placido's home-engineered army of killer duel robots. And what does Crow get to do during this part?

Uh. Well.

(Pictured: Bird Boy being demoted to benchwarmer while the city's being ransacked by murder duel robots.)

Nothing. A whole lot of nothing, is what.

During the duel robot invasion, we only ever flash back to Crow to ascertain that he is, in fact, useless during this part of the show, something he shares in common with Ruka, Rua, and Aki here, because all of them get pretty much nothing to do while Yusei finally gets the hang of accel synchro. Granted, Aki gets to save a little girl at the hospital, but in comparison to Yusei's lengthy, plot-heavy duel with Placido, this feels like a consolation prize. And for once, Jack is only marginally better off, too, because sure, he gets to beat up a couple of robots, but that's it, really.

Where Crow is concerned, his plot relevance doesn't actually resume once the Placido duel finishes, though. (And neither does Rua's, Ruka's, or Aki's, while we're at it.) Because wouldn't you know it, the next big thing directly after the duel robot invasion are the Red Nova episodes, where three out of five signers (Crow, Aki, and Ruka, unsurprisingly) are removed from the screen almost in their entirety again while Jack gets his much-needed dragon upgrade so he can keep up with Yusei, in order to uphold his status as a classic, almost-evenly-matched yugioh rival.

Speaking of upgrades and dragons, let's make a quick detour while our protag and rival duo take their express vacation to the Nazca plains. It is, of course, no secret that no signer outside of Yusei and Jack ever got a dragon upgrade within the anime. (No, I'm not forgetting about Life Stream Dragon. But that one, unlike Shooting Star Dragon and Red Nova Dragon, was a.) teased all the way back in the DS arc and b.) didn't have a unique summoning method or some other gimmick that made it an "elevated" synchro. So I'm discounting Life Stream as a "proper" dragon upgrade on purpose.) Is this the point where I start arguing that Crow should have gotten one, then? Well, not quite. Not with the writing the show canonically gave us, at least—after all, with how late Black-Winged Dragon was introduced, it would have been bonkers to upgrade him here already, if even at all. However, I do argue that the way the show hands only Yusei and Jack upgrades seems a bit... off. Now, I know why only those two get upgrades, or at least I think I do. After all, they're the central protag/rival duo, and within the framework of the character archetypes the larger yugioh canon has created for itself, this would have always made them the first, if not the only candidates for dragon upgrades. What feels a bit off to me, though, is that specifically the 5Ds cast feels like it... chafes a bit against those character archetypes, for lack of a better word. The problem is this: The signers, as far as the first two arcs are concerned, are sold to us as equals who all have very powerful ace monsters. Yes, Jack and Yusei are still undoubtedly the best duellists among them, but not on account of having uber-powerful extra special monsters that were acquired through supernatural means that are categorically inaccessible to the other signers. However, with the appearance of Shooting Star and Red Nova, this changes. While Yusei and Jack were previously and would have always been the two guys who had a Special dynamic with a capital "S" on account of their character archetypes, their acquisition of the dragon upgrades—and even more so, the lack of upgrades their fellow signers receive—now decidedly puts them in a different power bracket and skews the balance between previous, supposedly "equal" characters. (Which, unfortunately, is yet another thing that makes everyone else easier to sideline.)

Why do I bring all this up in a post dedicated to Crow? Because this new power imbalance arguably impacts him more than the other signers—because he's Team 5Ds' second wheeler and doesn't miss another WRGP match from here on out. Thus, that power imbalance is felt in the upcoming duels, where Yusei and Jack bust out Shooting Star and Red Nova like it's nothing, while Crow is left manoeuvring with the somewhat underpowered Black-Winged Dragon and whatever else he can come up with. This is also why I claimed that the show did sideline Crow in some aspects further above. Because while some parts of his writing go to great pains to establish him as part of a protagonist trifecta that is now supposed to take centre stage before the other characters, he also permanently lives in Jack and Yusei's shadow, ultimately barred not just from reaching equal status as a signer (due to his late and rocky introduction and dragon acquisition), but also barred from becoming the equal of his foster brothers as a duellist. Frankly, I'm surprised the show didn't make this a plot point, because the first thing my mind jumps to when I think about this is whether Crow felt left behind after his brothers acquired such immensely powerful, special cards. But more on my personal writing ideas later. For now, let's just put a pin in the power-imbalance thing.

So, when is Crow back on screen in any meaningful role, then? (Note that I mean this as literally as possible. As per my discussion about "screentime" and my gripes about it in part two, I gloss over the parts where Crow is on screen, but could be traded for any other signer or even a lamppost without affecting the scene at all.)

Well, the next thing Crow gets to do isn't exactly glorious, but it sure is funny.

(I want you all to remember that he has to wear this costume and play this part in Team 5Ds' absurd plan to capture Yaeger/Lazar because he lost at rock-paper-scissors. This will never not be funny to me.)

Ignoring the hilarious outfit and Crow playing the bait at a fabricated cup ramen promo event meant to lure Yaeger in, bird boy does actually get something that's not just for funsies to do during the two episodes where Team 5Ds is trying to get more information about Iliaster: He gets to have a duel revanche against Yaeger, who, if we remember the DS arc, ditched him the last time they squared off. Much like the Team Catastrophe duel, this one, too, calls back to previous duels Crow has had: For one, it's the obvious conclusion to his unfinished, first duel with Yaeger. And for two, Crow repeats a "trick" (for lack of a better term) here that is also unique to him: losing on purpose, which we remember from his duel with Lyndon.

(Identical-looking clown family jumpscare be upon ye.)

And again, much like getting injured for the Team Unicorn duel, I argue that this story beat here is something that could also only have been accomplished with Crow. Because he's the only one who has previously duelled Yaeger, firstly, because not wanting to make a child cry by beating their dad in a duel makes sense for him as a character due to him being a family-oriented person who loves children, secondly, and because losing on purpose in this scenario is a tactic that would seem out of character from anyone else, thirdly. (We recall, the only times Jack and Yusei, respectively, ever consider/offer to lose on purpose is when the lives of people close to them are on the line, in the shape of Carly/Rally. As for the others, aside from not being present, Aki, Rua, and Ruka are so heavily sidelined at this point that they would have never been an option for this. And if his writing is anything to go by, Bruno is mostly purposefully forbidden from accomplishing Plot Things, especially through duels, while he's Bruno.) But hey, due to the way this episode is set up, losing on purpose works out for Crow, because it convinces Yaeger to stop hiding and actually share his knowledge about Iliaster. This, by the way, is the second scene where Crow gets to be in a room with Sherry for a longer stretch of time. And look, him joking that Sherry might kill Yaeger if he doesn't spill the beans about Iliaster soon is fun and all, but in light of the Ark Cradle duel later, I have to point out that he, again, doesn't get to have so much as a shred of a meaningful conversation with Sherry here. Again. But moving on. The scene with Yaeger at the Poppo Time then leads us first to the small sequence in the arcade where the gang has to win a simulated duel to get Yaeger's encoded intel, then to episode 116—the Moment Express episode, where, due to this being a Yusei, Sherry, and Bruno-focussed episode, Crow gets nothing to do again. (And also doesn't get to interact with Sherry again.)

Congrats! We've survived the WRGP break. This leaves us with three more WRGP duels before shit hits the fan and the Ark Cradle arc commences. And full disclosure, I'll be doing a bit of a quick-fire round of those three duels. Why? Because despite them all having their merits in their own rights (they're the better liked duels of the WRGP for a reason), there honestly isn't that much focus on Crow during them. He duels, yes, and I've seen people point this out over and over again as the supposed smoking gun that shows how Crow had so much more relevance and screentime than Aki and yadda, yadda. We've been there. And it's not that I can't see where this argument is coming from—I'll be the first to tell you that it's a travesty that Aki never got to duel in the WRGP again outside of the Unicorn match. But I want to use the final three matches to dig into how the way these matches—and especially the opponents to go with them—were set up made it nearly impossible for Aki to replace Crow again during any point of the WRGP finals.

First, episode 118. This is the only preamble episode we get for the first two WRGP finals teams, and here, our group is split in two: Yusei, Bruno, and Rua introduce us to Team Taiyou, while Jack, Aki, and Crow introduce us to Team Ragnarok. There isn't much to say here, because the only thing this episode does for Crow is a shallow repeat of what the Team Catastrophe duel did: By putting him in a group with Aki and Jack, and letting them decide among themselves, independently, to check out the exhibition match, it implies that he voluntarily spends time with signers who aren't Yusei. Thumbs up. Gold star. You made an effort (I guess). Then, the real fun starts.

Round one. Team Taiyou.

(Pictured: The sweetest country bumpkins to ever grace this earth. Yes, I'm biased.)

So here's the deal with Team Taiyou, from a narrative standpoint, as best as I can grasp it: They are a callback to Team 5Ds' roots. Specifically, to the boys' Satellite roots. The Taiyou boys come from humble origins, have only one, mostly home-engineered duel runner, and play using old cards that are widely considered shitty, as 5Ds canon tells us. They are essentially the non-signer, countryside version of what Jack, Crow, and Yusei once were, which is why this is the first duel where the duellist constellation on Team 5Ds' end couldn't possibly have been altered. Team Taiyou is there to remind us where our boys started, so it has to be our boys duelling them. This also goes for Crow, even though this duel otherwise doesn't accomplish much for him, character-wise. Instead, it's more of a narrative wink at the audience, as well as providing a breather between otherwise extremely tense, plot-focussed duels. But yeah, Crow's part in this match isn't much to write home about; he doesn't get any verbal interactions that are very meaningful to his character, can't get so much as a scratch in on Zushin, even with Black-Winged Dragon, and is defeated so Yusei can take out the legendary giant.

Round two. Team Ragnarok.

(Behold the pizzazz of at least two contenders for Haircuts With The Most Spikes in the show.)

Though this duel is framed as being even more so aimed towards bolstering Jack's character writing than Crow's, given the inclusion of Dragan's personal history with Jack, Team Ragnarok gets significantly more interesting for Crow again than Team Taiyou did. This is, of course, mainly because of Brave/Broder. Where Team Taiyou were a callback to the 5Ds boys' roots, Team Ragnarok are their narrative foils. Dragan is the duellist who lost his pride to contrast Jack, who's brimming with pride at all times, and Harald/Halldor is essentially the rich, "destiny isn't bullshit, actually" version of Yusei. Meanwhile, unlike the first two, who highlight our 5Ds boys' characteristics by contrasting them, Brave acts as Crow's mirror. Through Team Ragnarok's flashbacks, we see that he gets almost exactly the same, lovable-rogue-type backstory that Crow did during the DS arc, just in a different setting. The only, major difference between them is that while Crow is more down-to-earth, Brave likes to be pretty flashy.

(Keep in mind that he's doing this on a runner. Is there such a thing as courses on how to do acrobatics on your runner? Like there are courses for vaulting on horseback irl? I'm overthinking this again.)

Unsurprisingly, the duel thus ends up addressing the similarities between Crow and Brave, mostly through two things: One, the duel essentially becomes a contest of who can out-trickster who, culminating in the famous, ridiculous-in-the-good-way sequence where Crow activates a trap from his graveyard, to the shock of pretty much everyone present. And two, despite being on opposite sides, the two bond over their concern for the children they took care of and their concern for children in general, which is expressed most clearly in the scene where Crow's kids, in an attempt to hold the poster they made for him higher, very nearly fall over the barricade in the WRGP stands. Despite the hefty length of the full duel, these are pretty much the only things actually related to Crow's character that come up, though. They're good, don't get me wrong, but in a duel that is otherwise this dense with plot, Aesir shenanigans, and Iliaster foreshadowing, it's no surprise that the duel doesn't add that much to Crow's character, outside of giving him someone he can bounce off very well and relate to. Again, though, we are faced with the same situation as with Team Taiyou: Due to the way the members of Team Ragnarok are written, meant to contrast/parallel one male duellist each from Team 5Ds, nobody other than Crow could have taken the third spot here, either. It would have felt awkward from a narrative standpoint (as much as I would have loved to see Aki duel more).

Now, finally. Round three. Team New World.

(Welp. Here come the robots.)

I had to check to make sure I wasn't misremembering this, but due to the way this duel was set up so José/Jakob could bust out Meklord Emperor Granel with a ridiculous amount of attack points, Crow gets a resounding four turns total in this duel. (Gee, I wonder which other character got this treatment during a WRGP duel.) During those four turns, there are only two things he accomplishes: One, leaving behind two combo pieces Yusei later uses, and two, showcasing the shrewd tactics that earned him the label of "trickster" during the Ragnarok duel by bringing out a non-synchro monster that can take advantage of a synchro monster's attack points and effects—Aurora the Northern Lights. And arguably, this is a very smart play, moreover, it's the only time anyone in the show has the bright idea to not use synchro monsters against the known and feared synchro-killer Meklords. Unfortunately, as smart as it is, the narrative doesn't reward Crow for this play—José all but shrugs what could have been a turning point in the duel off, then proceeds to steamroll Crow the next turn, leaving Yusei to score the win, as usual. To get back to the "Crow got so much more screentime than Aki during the WRGP" thing for a second, of all the duels in the WRGP finals, this is arguably the one where Aki could still most easily have taken Crow's spot again, because here, it doesn't matter whether it's him or someone else, as this duel isn't tied to his character in any way. Unfortunately, due to the Granel-steamroller-strategy, this is also the duel where letting Aki take his spot again would have been the biggest shot in the foot, because unless they had changed Team New World's strategy, Aki would have gotten brutally guillotined here, same as Crow—something I can't imagine anyone, not even people who hate Crow, being happy about.

With that, though, we've finally made it through the WRGP. So, what's the bottom line here? Frankly, speaking from my own interpretation, Crow occupies an... odd spot during this tournament, to say the least. Though he does get to duel the majority of the time, few of the duels actually cater to his character in any way. Moreover, he only gets to be the star of the show in a WRGP duel once, during the by far most forgettable match against Team Catastrophe. And mind that I use the term "star of the show" very loosely here, because the problem the WRGP arc as a whole has, in my opinion, is that the rather lame Team Catastrophe duel is the only one in the whole tournament that isn't won by Yusei, which categorically means that any of the other character's big moments are usually undermined by the fact that they ultimately still need him to save the day. Thus, moments like Aki summoning Stardust Dragon and Crow using an anti-synchro-killer strategy that for once actually forgoes synchros are somewhat cheapened by the fact that they're not actually the turning-point moments they're initially painted as, because ultimately, Yusei always has to be the one to save the day. What's worse is that this almost feels like a bit of a non-issue that could have easily been fixed—given that the show tells us that teams can shuffle around their line-up for a match any time. But unfortunately, the writing never interacts with this as a possible strategic element, nor does it ever seem to consider letting Yusei lose, or forcing him to give up his spot for a match. I feel the need to say that I don't put the blame at Yusei's feet here, though: This strongly feels like an oversight by the writers, and perhaps a disproportionate need to have a nigh-infallible protagonist (on the duelling side of things) that their audience would never run the risk of calling "lame". For Crow, though, this chiefly means one thing: In any duel other than the Catastrophe one, it was always clear that even if he partook, he would never finish the match. And yes, this is technically an issue Jack has, too. But this is where the character writing outside of the duels comes into play, too.

Unlike Jack, who actually gets to do something during the Diablo invasion (albeit very little), who gets his very own dragon upgrade and who gets a very personal, pre-duel plot with Dragan, the show's writing doesn't bother giving Crow a lot of plot- or character-relevant things to do, once the WRGP starts. This is also why I was so surprised at how much the Unicorn and Catastrophe duels embrace his interactions with Aki—compared to the later duels in the finals, this portion still makes Crow feel genuinely relevant and interwoven with the other characters. Meanwhile, out of the three final duels, only the Ragnarok one actually tries to establish a connection to his characterisation, through Brave. The Taiyou duel only sets itself up in such a way that Aki partaking instead of him would have been awkward. Meanwhile, the New World duel just has him being treated like a floormat in a sad parallel to Aki during the Unicorn duel, seeing as they both get a nice moment where it looks like they might turn the duel around (Aki summoning Stardust Dragon and Black Rose Dragon onto the field at the same time; Crow summoning Aurora the Northern Lights, which couldn't be absorbed by the Meklords), only to have their hopes dashed as they're mercilessly cleared off the track. Outside of the duels, many scenes sadly give the impression that they may as well not have included Crow, though—he often gets so little to contribute to a moment or even to say at all that substituting him with a cardboard box seems like it would not have impacted the scene in any way. And that's without addressing his non-existent connection to Sherry, which feels extra glaring, given his later interactions with her on the Ark Cradle.

All in all, the WRGP feels like a very mixed bag, where Crow's character writing is concerned. His belated backstory, which I talked about in part two, is front-loaded and asks as many questions as it answers. Then the tournament commences, gives him some actually decent character interplay with Aki for once (at the cost of letting her succeed in the tournament, it seems), only for him to be basically irrelevant during the WRGP pause again. And once the whole thing resumes, it becomes this hot-and-cold thing where some duel aspects seem tailored to him, while others treat him as completely expendable. The end result is an arc where I'm left wondering why exactly the writers felt the need to make it seem like Crow made up one portion of a protagonist trifecta, if they never actually bothered treating him as equal to the other two. (The answer, I believe, lies somewhere between the fumbled setup they did for him during the Fortune Cup and DS arc, and the way yugioh in general treats its character archetypes. But that's just speculation on my part.) The one, saving grace the WRGP (outside of the Pearson backstory) has for Crow is that it at least doesn't introduce any new character- and/or timeline inconsistencies. In fact, his character stays remarkably true to form once the tournament begins.

Okay, onto the final bit, then. As I've done in both previous posts, let me delve into completely subjective territory and offer some ideas on how this arc could have been handled to make it seem a little less all over the place with Crow. And since his writing here canonically intersects with Aki's several times, let me try to do it while offering the best of both worlds to both characters, if I can.

As far as Crow's backstory is concerned, I've already offered my solutions to that in part two. Now, to stay consistent with my own suggestions, I'll try to branch off what I wrote in the last post. This means that, as per my previous two analyses, we're dealing with two scenarios again: One, Crow stays a signer and we try to touch canon as little as possible. Two, Crow isn't a signer and we adjust canon in whatever way we need to to make him feel interesting and necessary despite/because of that.

First, though, let's get two adjustments I personally would have made in both versions out of the way:

The way the WRGP is structured puts every character that isn't Yusei at a massive disadvantage, where character moments in duels are concerned. Thus, I propose an overhaul. Among the changes I think could have benefitted the characters (yes, all of them) are: One - Aki actually getting to accomplish something during the Unicorn duel (she can and should still have her moments with Crow, but maybe let her portion of the duel end in her thanking him for coaching her, creating a more upbeat scene that strengthens their friendship, which could double as good setup for their later double-duel against Sherry). Two - letting the Team Catastrophe duel actually play out properly (as in, they become more meaningful as opponents by having a better strategy, for example, and Crow could stick it out longer against them, in order to make this more so his win than Jack's. Also, why not let Aki actually see him get back at Team Catastrophe for her?). Three - giving Crow an actual character moment during the Taiyou duel (what if one of the country boys had played a card or two of the ones he learned to read from? It could have helped drive the parallel between the two teams home.) Four - letting Crow's anti-Meklord strategy get at least a little payoff, if only for two turns (show us at least proof of concept, damn it!). Yes, the Ragnarok duel is the only one I wouldn't rewrite (unless special circumstances are introduced, see below). Additionally, let Team 5Ds alter their line-up more than once, damn it. Let them actually strategise about the duels, let them take into consideration who should go first when and whose deck might be better suited to which scenario. Also, remove Yusei from at least one duel. Doesn't matter how, just let him not partake once. Perfect setup to let Aki duel again, and would also allow for spicy character interactions. (Arguably the best duels where this could have been done would have been any of the final duels, though it would have also required rewriting the antagonists somewhat in any case.)

For the love of god, give Sherry and Crow some setup. Let them actually interact, let them introduce their philosophies to one another, just do something, anything to make Crow understanding and talking sense into her during the finale seem earned. A few chance meetings, or maybe even a tiny side-plot could have done so much here. And if you can't let them interact outright, at least let Aki and Crow talk about Sherry! Double whammy! The two characters who end up duelling against her are made to seem even more like a team, and Crow actually gets to find out what Sherry's deal is on-screen. Just. Set. it. up. I beg you.

There we go. Now, onto the two branches.

Option A: Crow stays a signer and obtained Black-Winged Dragon.

Seeing as Crow's signer status, funnily enough, isn't all that relevant during the tournament itself (save for two notable exceptions), there aren't that many fixes to be made here. Crow can still get injured, miss out on the Unicorn duel and be the star of the Catastrophe duel. But giving him something to do during the duel robot invasion that isn't standing around and hoping Yusei will fix everything would also be nice. It's fine if he can't drive out there and duel, but why not let him do something else? He's a crafty guy, why not let him find, say, a way to fry the Diablos' runners, taking a few of them out even from a semi-stationary position without duelling them? He could at least get as much of a consolation prize scene as Aki got with her saving that child. Then there's Team Taiyou, which, save for what I proposed above, is a duel that doesn't feel like it needs changes. Crow does his thing here. That's it. The same goes for Team Ragnarok, especially given that they're specifically written to oppose an all-signers Team 5Ds. Finally, there's Team New World, which, if I'm being completely candid, I would personally overhaul to change the cyborgs' strategy entirely in order to actually let all three members of Team 5Ds shine. But this is the version where I touch canon as little as possible, so... Aside from what I wrote above, no changes needed. Just make Crow seem a little more relevant, make his strategy have at least a little payoff, even if Granel's back out and menacing literally two turns later.

Option B: Crow, as per my previous posts, isn't a signer and doesn't have Black-Winged Dragon.

This is the version that would categorically require heavier changes, though they honestly don't arrive until the break in the tournament. Unicorn and Catastrophe stay the same, I would still propose that Crow gets to be a little more useful during the Diablo invasion. But! In this version, seeing as he never acquired BWD, the break in the WRGP would be an excellent spot to let Crow acquire an upgrade for his beefy Blackwing ace monster of choice. Give him a little side-plot, too, something to do, something where he proves himself. Maybe let him run into Iliaster here, or maybe call back to Pearson again and introduce the new Blackwing upgrade as a treasure Pearson stashed away before he died (maybe this could have even been the card Bolger was actually after; the world is our oyster here). Then he's beefed up, too, and actually feels a little more on the same level as Jack and Yusei. The tournament recommences and again, the Taiyou duel could stay mostly the same, I think. Ragnarok and New World are where it gets really interesting, though. The way I see it, Ragnarok could go two ways with Crow not being a signer: Either he partakes as he did in canon and his non-signer status is called out as a peculiarity by our Swedish boys who happen to be obsessed with fate (which would make his performance against Brave seem all the more impressive), or, due to this being a duel all about destiny and celestial pissing contests, Crow's spot is given to Aki again for this duel due to her signer status (this would, obviously, require rewriting Brave, perhaps even switching him out for a Ragnarok lady instead). As for Team New World, this duel would honestly be a lot more juicy with a non-signer Crow, because much like he was for the dark signers, a non-signer Crow would essentially be an unknown in their plan for the cyborgs. He would be the guy who's Not Supposed To Be Here. Granted, he would still be beaten, but he could still get an excellent moment where his out-of-left-field anti-Meklord strategy genuinely seems to turn the tables for a bit, angering José and providing even stronger setup for Yusei to win later.

Aaaaand that's that. Somehow, I get the feeling the WRGP had the least things that needed fixing because it also had the least actual character writing. But that might just be me. It's late and I have been writing for A While. But hey, I got out part three faster than part two! I consider that an achievement.

Now, while I get my talking points in order for part four, I hope you'll have fun chewing on this one. See you in the grand finale to my Bird Boy dissertation.

[roo-bastmoon]

Incredibly lucky to even be here

I just realized, exactly one year ago today (May 11th) I was diagnosed with endometrial stromal sarcoma and given less than a 34% chance of survival. I'm incredibly, miraculously lucky to be well and cancer-free today. I owe that to my amazing doctors, and also in a small way to BTS.

The moment I got told I had cancer, I immediately decided to only entertain thoughts of complete health and victory. It was a pure and immediate defense mechanism and I stuck to it. So no sad songs or movies or TV shows. No online drama. No negative nellies or naysayers. No stressful projects at work. No arguments, no entanglements, no regrets.

For months, I would focus only on laughter and quality time with loved ones and things that brought me joy, even as I had to deal with practical stuff like creating a will and a pet trust and filling out life insurance forms and undergoing test and surgeries.

BTS (and Jimin, as my "recruiter") gave me moments of grace and beauty and art and warmth and giggles--and kind ARMYs gave me a sense of belonging and community, especially during a dark and terrifying time, when in the quiet of the early morning hours, the sense that my own body was my worst enemy would eat at all my mental defenses. I could switch on my phone, go to the timeline, and ARMY and BTS would be there.

If I seem to be very Pollyanna-ish or boringly polite these days, it's because I decided one year ago to focus on what I want instead of giving energy to what I don't. I know bad things are very real and they need to be confronted--of course! But I also know that depression, anger, and fear can erode the myelin sheath wrapped around our nerve endings and weaken the walls in the chambers of our hearts; that toxic emotions can bleach our hair of color and rob our nails and skin of suppleness; that negativity can lengthen our immuno-response times to bruises and cuts.

So if other folks get a thrill, a hit of adrenaline, from drama and trash talking in our fandom, more power to them, I guess. It must serve them in some way I don't understand. Me? I find meanness and pettiness draining and damaging. So I'll never do that. I'll never rudely call someone out in public or go on their blog to rant or snipe openly about members or fellow ARMY. I will just keep myself to myself and do my best to be authentic and kind and hard working.

Doesn't always work. I'm human. I will absolutely make mistakes (case in point--the campaign idea yesterday that could have really harmed Jimin. I didn't think about all the consequences and I'm so grateful to the people who patiently set me straight.) Please know that if you ever feel strongly I'm going in the wrong direction, you can always speak to me--I'll ask a million questions, I'll hear you out, and I'll try to be flexible in my mindset. You don't have to hide behind throw-away accounts or talk to others about me. I will do my best to always be kind and act in good faith with everyone. (But I'll likely still make some mistakes, because my intentions are good but I myself am not perfect.)

By and large, I feel I'm just really astronomically lucky to be here. I know the kind of cancer I had is very sneaky and could come back at any time. So how I spend my time left in this life matters to me. I want to be a source of good in the world, help other people, experience bliss and celebrate good things. I don't want to be selfish or destructive. If I start to go that way, I know good friends will gently call me back.

Like BTS, I want to connect with people and help build something worthy. So if you're on board with that, let's be friends. And if you're not, let's part amicably.

I just... figured I should probably say that... out loud. So that's that on that.

Love you guys,

Roo

[river-muse]

What's Come to Pass?

That is by far the most dangerous of the WIPS that I listed for the ask game I swear. That's because this is uhhh very NASNAH related.

So, currently I don't have "What's Come To Pass" listed as canon to the timeline for NASNAH, but depending on how I'm feeling about it as we get further in the series I might actually go through with adding it.

BIG warning for NASNAH spoilers from here on out! I cannot separate character appearances or events well enough to not end up showing something important unintentionally. Read at your own risk! <3

So, before I've mentioned that things will still happen, but just in a different way compared to canon. What's Come To Pass is the boiling point of unresolved trauma turned into the DMC5 events but wrong. Vergil doesn't have a hand in the Qliphoth breaking through the veil in Red Grave, but he certainly doesn't help make matters easier because his brain thinks "If we can't stop this tree and another demon takes the fruit for themselves- there is a high chance they will put my family at risk again." And you know, a few decades still hasn't toned down his reckless decisions.

I can't show too much for excerpts, but I did pick out two of the safest ones even if it does reveal that a certain character doesn't die like in canon and another one makes an absolutely horrible choice for the sake of "necessity." There's definitely an ongoing theme about making decisions to take action on your own and those decisions having severe consequences for those who never had a say in it.

-

“I mean to ensure that my counterpart can claim the throne by any means.” V says “This has gone beyond a fanciful notion and is a close reality. In a month’s time the tree will bloom, and the fruit it shall bear will make Vergil king. Then there will be nothing that would dare bring harm to our family.” “At the cost of how many lives?” Credo questions. “That number’s inconsequential in the face of what could happen if anyone else were to take the throne. Sacrifices have to be made.” “Sacrifices?” Nero’s face twists up “Griffon, you’re going along with this? Where’s Shadow?” “She’s here with me, as well.” V raises his arm, gazing at the swirling markings “All four of us are in agreement. Turn around. Go back, because I can’t promise your safety if you earn his ire.” “Four?” Dante rests the point of Rebellion on the ground and leans on it “Last I checked you had a chicken and a cat. That makes three of you.” “I would prefer not to place all of my cards on the table, if you don’t mind.” “How disgraceful.” Credo’s upper lip curls just a bit, though his lack of fangs makes it less intimidating than intended “For someone such as you to ignore casualties for a selfish advantage-“ “Not the first time he’s done this.” Dante says “Raising towers to chase after power is a repeat offense for him apparently.” “The Temen-Ni-Gru was necessary.” V hisses. “Was it, really?” Dante asks.

-

“This wasn’t what we agreed upon, Urizen.” V’s voice is soft, breaking apart with the words “The boy was not to be harmed.” “He wouldn’t yield to what must be done.” Urizen responds “Come- they will be here soon, and it is unwise for a human as frail as you to insert yourself amidst this battle. It was foolish enough that you attempted to prevent this in the first place.” Nero’s vision blurs. He tries to reach for the vision of V passing him and only meets air. Faint whispered words of apology pass to him and they don’t process. He shakes off the darkness of unconsciousness to see V stepping up onto Urizen’s outstretched palm. Urizen lifts V up to a higher ledge just behind where Urizen is, only pulling away when V has himself settled.

-

There was one last excerpt that I had considered but it had too many things that I didn't want to show just yet. Thank you for asking about it if you read this far!

I've got brainworms and I regret nothing <3

[betweenthings2]

gatty “we are so lucky to have you” would be so perfect

Thank you for the ask!! The prompt list is here if anyone else would like to see it =) I know my promised one month turn around on prompts has truly fallen apart, but I do love them and I have so much fun writing them and I very much appreciate you guys sending them to me.

Words of affirmation- "We are so lucky to have you."

The sound of the clock is the only thing George can focus on. It's too loud, too much, especially in the small, quiet room. His desk is under a big window that overlooks their back yard and he can see Matty, smiling and playing fetch with Mayhem, pausing periodically to scratch the dog behind his ears and push curls out of his own face. George wishes he were down there, too, but he'd agreed with Matty on an ambitious timeline and now nothing is going like he wants it. Things had been better earlier in the day, when Matty was here, too, sitting on the floor with a guitar and listening, but he, and Mayhem, got restless and George sent them both outside.

He regrets that now and the clock is still too fucking loud. George is half tempted to take it down and just throw it at the wall, anything to get it to shut up, but he doesn't. Instead, he gets it down and takes the batteries out, leaving everything sitting on the edge of the desk. The ticking sound seems to echo for a few moments, then it's blissfully quiet. Still when he sits back down to keep working, nothing really works right and his gaze keeps wandering out the window to Matty and Mayhem. They look happy.

Despite knowing Matty had promised to come back when he'd left, George can't help but jump slightly when Matty knocks on the doorframe to announce his return. He stays there until George pauses what he's working on and turns to  invite him in. Matty's been making an effort about respecting George's space when he's working. George has mixed feelings about that--on one hand it's nice to have the space and time to focus, but on the other, he likes having Matty around, even if he is quick to get bored or restless.

"What'd the clock ever do to you?" Matty asks, crossing the room.

George shrugs. "Saw you guys outside," he offers.

Matty smiles. "Was probably for the best that you got tired of us."

"I didn't get tired of you," George protests. "You got bored and Mayhem wanted to go out."

"Whatever you say," Matty agrees. "I thought about making dinner, but then I remembered the last time I tried to cook, so I've brought tea," he raises the mug slightly, "and I've ordered takeaway from that Indian place. Mayhem and I are gonna walk down as get it. How's it goin'?"

"I'm just making it worse at this point," George mutters, glancing at his laptop then back to Matty.

Matty frowns sets the mug he's carrying on the desk and reaches out to cradle Georges jaw, thumb brushing over his cheekbone. "That's not true, love. I'm pretty sure you'd have to work to make something worse," he says. "Lemme hear?"

"Yeah, ok," George agrees. He pulls up the track that he'd been working on and plays in from the beginning, studying Matty for any kind of reaction while he listens. When it's over he says, "Dunno what's wrong with it, 's just not doing what it's supposed to."

Matty nods. "You haven't made it worse," is what he starts with, "but I see what you mean. Let me think on it?"

"Think on it all you want, but it's all like that." George sighs. "We should have someone else do this. I don't know why we thought I was the person to do this."

"First of all," Matty starts, "we are so lucky to have you. So, so lucky. Second of all, I'm absolutely certain that you are the best person to do this. You wanna come pick up the takeaway with us?"

George shakes his head. "We're on a deadline."

"The deadline is bullshit. I came up with the deadline and every time I come up with a deadline we end up pushing it back, and there's no point in you sitting here and making yourself miserable. Come for a walk. You'll feel better. You can go back to being miserable after if you want."

"Do you think that maybe that's why we end up pushing things back?" George asks. "Because you don't take your own deadlines seriously?"

Matty shrugs, but he says, "That sounds like something my therapist would say which is a little bit weird for me, so no more saying wise things, just get up and come with me."

"Alright," George agrees, letting Matty urge him to his feet and lead him out of the room and downstairs. Much to his chagrin, he feels better just getting up and moving a little bit, and he says, "Are you gonna be insufferable if I say you were right?"

"Insufferable, probably not," Matty answers. "A little obnoxious, probably."

George can't help but laugh and he pauses before pulling his shoes on to pull Matty close and say, "Thank you."

Matty tugs him down for a kiss then says, "Always."

[freelanceexorcist]

Spoilers and more pedantry that I would ever ask you to live though if I was in my right mind right now:

So I’m pretty firmly in the camp of Watashi Sephiroth and Ore Sephiroth being two different people, or more accurately, two versions of the same person from different timelines. I’ll find out soon enough if I’m wrong about this or not, but there have been clues dropped that this could be the case.

So let me put my speculatin’ hat on one last time.

I know I told you the last time was the last time, but things change.

The pronoun switch from Watashi to Ore in Japanese is just the first clue, and I can’t blame anyone who misses that one because they don’t speak Japanese and/or don’t have access to good faith translations of Japanese materials. I was lucky enough to stumble upon the Twitter account of @aitaikimochi, who is an absolute treasure in this department as she’s fluent in both English and Japanese (don’t know which one is her first language).

Then there’s the bit in the Ultimania (or maybe an interview? I don’t remember) where they pretty much come right out and say Ore is a version we’ve never seen before. But that’s also in Japanese so again, no one can blame anyone for missing that one either.

Another subtle clue is the other characters’ reactions when Sephiroth is onscreen. When Cloud has one of his glitches in the presence of others and Sephiroth appears, the others don’t react the same way he does. This is because Cloud is the only one who can see him and the creators have said as much. There are multiple versions of Sephiroth, according to official sources. One version is a memory and the other is described as an illusion. It’s not clarified if by illusion they mean a vision with an external source or a hallucination. That one will probably remain a Maybe Magic, Maybe Mundane (warning: TV Tropes) situation.

He has a third form in which he manifests using Marco and the other black-cloaked men as a meat suit. But still…other characters’ reactions make it seem like Cloud is still the only one who can see him. In Marco’s apartment, Cloud is attacked by Sephiroth using Marco. Tifa rushes in just in time to see Cloud about to cut him in two with the Buster Sword.

So how does she react? Is it shock at seeing Sephiroth after all this time? Is it fear? Is it happiness that Sephiroth is about to get got? Nope. It’s concern. For Sephiroth.

But why though? She of all people should be thrilled that the man who ruined her life is about to get what’s coming to him.

Yet she stops Cloud and goes to help. Why? Because all she sees is Marco, perhaps. She doesn’t see Sephiroth.

Another instance is in The Drum. Cloud glitches and then all of a sudden Sephiroth appears. Cloud is scared and angry, but the rest don’t react in a way you’d expect. That is to say they don’t really react at all. When Cloud charges at Sephiroth, Tifa cries out to him. But is it because her friend is going full Leeroy Jenkins on someone who can squash him like a grape? Or is it because she sees him charging at Marco?

My point, and I do have one, is that Watashi is the one that likely only Cloud can see. Meanwhile, Ore can be seen by and can interact with everyone. Hell, they all fight him.

Then there’s the issue of behavior. I’ve talked about these differences before, but here’s a summary. Ore Sephiroth is helpful to Cloud. He asks for his help. He seems dejected when Cloud refuses. When they fight, he merely disarms him, drops a cryptic line and peaces out after deciding Cloud isn’t strong enough to help yet (that’s how I’m interpreting his “not yet” line, anyway). There are other differences though, that I’m just now realizing.

The way he walks. Watashi’s gait is slightly feminine, with softly swaying hips. It’s subtle, but he got dat lady swagger. In the Rebirth demo, his gait is more masculine. You can’t tell much from Crisis Core, because the mechanics are just as clunky as the original even though the graphics have a new coat of paint.

His facial expressions. That is to say, Ore actually has more than one. Watashi’s facial expression is rarely anything but smugness or malice. Ore’s face expresses gentleness, openness, disappointment and determination or, when he’s fighting the party, anger and intensity. He gets a smug look before he fights Cloud, but even then it looks more like he knows he’s about to have some fun. This same expressiveness can be seen in the Ever Crisis trailer, Crisis Core and the Rebirth demo.

His body language. Watashi faces a target or opponent head on and looks them dead in the eye nearly the whole time. The latter can be a sign of attentiveness but also a display of dominance. He never allows himself to appear vulnerable. He never turns his back on his opponent. We don’t see him sitting in any scenes, so there’s not data there yet. He gives no clue to what he’s thinking or feeling using his body movements.

Ore, in Crisis Core, Ever Crisis and the Rebirth demo, often turns his body away from someone he’s speaking to if he doesn’t fully turn his back to them. He bows his head or looks at the ground when he speaks so his hair hides his expression. This can be interpreted as shyness or discomfort. He crosses his arms over his torso. This can be interpreted as a self-protective gesture or one of defensiveness. It’s the same with the crossed legs when he’s sitting in the truck in the Rebirth demo. Like Watashi, we don’t see Ore sitting, so nothing to analyze there.

Finally, and this one is a little tricky, is his fighting style. There are indications that the remaining Whispers have at least some degree of control over him and are trying force him into his one-winged angel role during his fight with the party. For example, his wing dissolves into a cloud of them.

But that’s neither here nor there. When he’s fighting the party (presumably) under the influence, he fights like hell. In some shots you can see the effort he’s putting out there. He takes it very seriously, as well he should.

Ore in the Edge of Creation looks like he’s having fun. He’s just playing with Cloud, likely testing him out. He’s just styling on him, barely putting any effort into the fight and he doesn’t really need to, using over the top, dancer-like moves and blocking strikes without even looking. At the end, he merely disarms Cloud. To him, the fight was just a friendly sparring session.

If at any point Ore covers his face with one hand or places a hand over his heart, I think that will clinch it that he’s not the same as Watashi, who is highly unlikely to display such vulnerability.

So where does Ore come from? Well, I’ve speculated in the past that Ever Crisis takes place in a different timeline than main Remake story, quite possibly in the one where Zack survives. If this doesn’t turn out be the case, everything I’m about to say is rendered invalid.

But if it does…

In the Ever Crisis timeline, he knows what his mother looks like even though he was given a false name. He even has a picture of her until he loses it. This picture means so much to him that he’s willing to search corpses in hopes of finding it again. In the original, he didn’t even have that much, as Genesis knows he doesn’t even know what she looks like, because he taunts him with it.

In this timeline, he makes friends early on, and he grows close enough to them that he’s willing to rebel against Shinra alongside them. He cared enough about them to risk his own hide. The First Soldier trio will probably end up getting fired. But Sephiroth? Based on what we know of Hojo’s treatment of him, he should be so lucky. He seems to know that firing him is not an option because he’s so valuable to Shinra. Assuming “I’m one of Professor Hojo’s soldiers” is just a whiffed localization, he’s the only one of his kind. But based on what we know of how Hojo treated him, he would be punished. Painfully. He would need to be reminded of his place and who he belongs to. He was willing to risk that to be with his friends and help someone he’s never met.

His friends, specifically his big bro Glenn, teach him compassion. Companionship and camaraderie. They teach him how to loosen up and have fun. They teach him empathy. They treat him the same way they would treat any other kid. He gets to see how a normal group of friends interacts and tries to be a part of that group.

And if it wasn’t just a whiffed translation? That would mean there were at least a few others like him, at least for a while. He would be less alone. He would still know he was different and special, but he’d at least have others in the same boat to relate to.

That little bit of kindness, camaraderie and having others like him in his life who were like him, even if only briefly, while we must assume that Watashi didn’t have these things, could very well have set Ore on a different path. And the people who want him to suffer endlessly and become irredeemably evil in every universe will just have to be happy with the one version.

But what about that line about him acknowledging that he killed Tifa, you ask. Good question.

This seems to suggest that Ore accepts responsibility for the Nibelheim incident, but without context, it’s hard to say.

Trailers and promos are notorious for deceptive editing that misdirects the audience, especially if the editors are trying to keep a lid on a big twist. Naoki Hamaguchi has been notoriously enthusiastic about the huge twists he promises are coming yet he’s still doing a great job of preventing us from figuring out what they are.

So that bit from the trailer might be misdirection. How many times have we seen bits of dialogue in trailers and promos that are spoken while scenes the conversation doesn’t take place in appear onscreen? It’s also not unheard of for lines of dialogue being spoken in two or more scenes to be edited together to seem like they all took place at the same time. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if that line doesn’t even appear in the final product, although that’s unlikely. Without context, we just don’t know what’s going on.

Ore may be responsible for Nibelheim and Tifa’s injury and the trailer truly is being plainspoken about that. This is the simplest explanation.

Or maybe it’s a wee bit more complicated. Here are some possibilities ranging from zero to Epileptic Trees (again, TV Tropes).

Ore Sephiroth killed his own version of Tifa and the Nibelheim incident went down as usual. Zack and Cloud ending up in the same place at the same time and under the same circumstances in the timeline where he survives as they were in the one where he was set up to die strongly indicate that. At some point, Ore shook off Jenova’s influence and has his own agenda now, though that agenda is unknown at this point.

Ore, for some reason, believes himself to be responsible but for reasons unknown may not actually be.

As they merge the multiple timelines to bring about Rebirth, Mommy & Me may be performing a Fusion Dance (you know the drill) and absorbing all the variants of Sephiroth in the other timelines/universes to gain their power, and Ore is no exception. He “remembers” killing Tifa for the same reason Cloud “remembers” being a SOLDIER 1st Class: because he’s receiving bits and pieces of Watashi’s memories and confusing them for his own. I kind of like this one because damn, what potential for drama. Ore would feel all of the guilt and shame of an act he didn’t even commit. He would be desperately trying to atone for something he wasn’t even responsible for. He would be slowly losing himself and becoming a part of some twisted hive mind without knowing it. Hmm, maybe one of the promised twists is that it will be a race against the clock to stop Mommy & Me from becoming too powerful and keeping Ore from getting assimilated.

Ore says “I killed her” because saying “he, that guy that looks like me and is probably what I would have become if I’d gotten even fewer hugs growing up” just seemed to awkward to him. Yeah, even adjusting my tinfoil hat doesn’t make that one sound less stupid.

But I digress.

In conclusion (“oh, thank GOD” – everybody), Ore may not be who we think he is because he is from a different timeline and while the same person as Watashi in a sense, he is a version of him whose life took a slight detour.

[suffersinfandom]

Okay, so I usually try to stay out of discourse and drama and all of that because I'm here to have a nice time, but I saw a post in the OFMD tag after the whole Blackbonnet/Stucky poll thing that I really need to type about. It's just... so bad. Like, I totally get disliking things (I dislike things too!), and I understand that OFMD isn't everyone's thing, but wow. WOW. Um.

While the first part's annoying (point to the tumblr fandom that has absolutely no one in it with a victim complex, please), what I really take issue with is the last bit -- the assertion that OFMD's cast diversity is there to be "inclusive" and "progressive" when the narrative isn't. That's just not true? One of the reasons for OFMD's popularity IS its inclusiveness! People who have never seen themselves represented in a show finally *see themselves* in some of these characters, and I think that's lovely. And the show has a wonderfully diverse crew behind the scenes and in the writing room as well!

As for "the narrative being the opposite"... all I can do is assume that OP never bothered watching OFMD. It's the most genuinely, earnestly inclusive and progressive piece of media I've ever consumed.

The acting in OFMD isn't stylistically different from any other show I've watched. The situations and lines are often comedic, Stede and Ed are definitely prone to dramatics, and plenty of the characters are pathetic (affectionate), but this is such a weird critique. Or maybe I just haven't picked anything up from a lifetime of watching media and being a massive dorkass theater nerd? Idk. Maybe they just think the show itself is cringe (I certainly don't think it is, but that's something I've seen plenty of folks who dislike it say) and that colors their opinion on the acting?

Also: where's the slavery apologism? As many other people have said, there's definitely room for good faith criticism of OFMD: its tendency to gloss over the existence of slavery, the rom-comification of real, historic slaveowners, etc, but there's no apologia in the text of the show. (Correct me if I'm wrong! I'm very white and will defer to others here.)

I'm gonna need some sources. I've seen the various accusations, but never evidence or anything that couldn't potentially be explained with context. (I don't actually take much issue with this point -- it's not a crime to think someone's annoying -- I just don't understand the constant vilification of Taika.)

"REAL gay piracy," lol. I can't say much about Black Sails since I haven't watched it (tbh it doesn't sound like something I'd be able to enjoy), but I haven't seen that much seriousness in the OFMD fandom. Do I have all of the annoying crewmates blocked? Do y'all feel like you have a lot to prove? I personally only became invested in this poll when I saw the death threats from Stucky folks, and my impression from my timeline is that most everyone else was in the same boat.

If you ARE taking these polls to heart, please don't! They're for fun (sometimes petty) fandom drama! Win or lose, we all love our ships and our communities and we really don't need to prove anything to anyone (I say, typing out a response to a thing that got under my skin, resolutely not touching grass).

THIS is where I had to start typing. WHAT DOES IT MEAN. How is a show with multiple canon queer couples gaybaiting? Isn't "canon gaybait" an oxymoron, or has the meaning changed? (I'm old, genuinely lmk if my millennial ass is missing something.) Again, I can only assume that OP either hasn't watched OFMD or hates fun romcoms, because the gayness of it all isn't the only thing the show has to offer. My brainworms have better taste than that.

It's some of the best gay rep I've ever seen and I would be delighted to see better! I mean it! I've been in queer circles for almost two decades and in fandom even longer; OFMD is some of the best, kindest, most loving, genuine representation I've come across in that time. I truly hope that it's just the beginning of a new era in media.

"Weak fandom output." I am *drowning* in fandom output and I love that for me! "Driest gay kiss." I'm sorry you don't like awkward middle-aged men who think they're unlovable coming together in what might very well be the first loving kiss either of them has ever had, but I think it's very sweet and moving! No fictional characters have ever owned my brain like this before! I love my silly traumatized queer pirates who can't communicate to save themselves. They're very beautiful to me.

Anyway, that's enough of that. I've released the pettiness and I'm going to go back to being annoying about seeing the lads again in just a few more days. <3

[davekat-sucks]

I realized that in order for postcanon Rose to stay “in character” between the end of the Candy epilogues and the most recent Homestuck: Beyond Canon upd8, Rose would have to be lying to John about how happy she is at the end of the Candy epilogue as a way to manipulate John into something… maybe just being content with his life in this narrative irrelevant timeline or maybe to make John think everything is a-ok in RoseMary central and don’t snoop around.

Either way this headcanon retcons Candy Rose from housewife of a sapphic couple living her golden years to a husk of a woman who has had her life destroyed yet weaved by her seer powers, to be someone who only does actions out of inevitability or to her best advantage, like a white woman version of Doctor Manhattan from Watchmen.

Of course it’s not inherently wrong to explore or analyze Rose’s god powers and how they both advantage and reconstruct her, especially after the retcon when Rose’s powers weren’t inhibited by alcohol. However, like most things in postcanon this exploration of the concept is hardly explored and rather focus goes to the consequences of the new motivations from the post-timeskip characters. Of course fans can do the heavy lifting and cherrypick from canon what Rose did post retcon and conclude that yes, it is in character for her to do this and the writers have been working hard writing deep, complex, and human characters. Just like they did for Jade and Jane.

It’s also once again a means to flanderize Rose as this super serious cunning thinker who is always 3 steps ahead and always grim and cryptic and rebellious because some voice(s) that commune to her speak of the true route for her to take.

Rose was being very serious when she talked with John about the incoming meteors and definitely did not play along with any wordplay or inside jokes among her friendgroup, she was being very serious when she made a moustache from a w magnet, she was being very serious in every conversation with Dave and all that banter was actually super cereal planning and coordination to enter her sburb session and Dave’s tendency to trail off or act cool absolutely did not invite any irony to the conversation that enticed Rose to tease Dave about his façade of being cool. Rose was being VERY VERY serious when she adopted Casey and renamed her to Viceroy Von Bubbles, very serious business indeed,

I’m sorry for going off the rails, I miss the old Rose.

It's alright. But you got good points here. Guess it isn't enough for Vriska to knock the alcohol out of her hands. Fanon had really seen Rose as this serious but cool calm goth girl, just like how Kanaya had imagined her to be when she read her walkthrough. But in reality, she was just as silly as the rest of her friends. It's a different kind of silly compared to Jade's genki personality. Sucks that characters like them can't be silly for silly sake.

[immortalspacelesbian]

can i ask what happened on twitter? i'm sorry BG3 twit is so insane but there are a lot of active folks here on tumblr that are much nicer imo. hope you can find a new place here and we stan all minthara lovers. queen shit. 🙏❤️

i’d say “long story short” but there’s 0 ways i can make this short there’s just SO much 😭

basically those datamined lines with halsin and minthara were found, where halsin refuses to work with minthara and makes tav choose between them even though minthara is begging for shelter from the absolute, and minthara lovers were like ‘ew wtf halsin fuck him she’s a victim of the absolute.’

we were in our own corner on our own tweets with our mututls ranting about these lines, and some halsin fans decided to come onto our tweets and talk about how they want minthara dead dead and the ways they’d kill her and stuff like that. which, to be honest, is completely unwarranted and a dick move. they were told to basically fuck off and that’s where shit hit the fan.

i won’t name names, but someone made a thread about how halsin wasn’t in the wrong at all because minthara was his abuser (which she wasn’t, she did nothing to him, it was the goblins, and she hardly knows who he is.) i think some people corrected them but i can’t remember? anyway, we made our own tweets like “minthara isn’t halsin’s abuser btw.”

person who made that thread proceeded to say that people who dislike halsin are queerphobic…

some of us tweeted about not throwing around words like abuse, abuser, and queerphobia and to not water them down. i made my own tweet too.

and then they said that we think ‘lesbians are the only “good” members of the community’ and that ‘supporting gay, bi, or trans members is oppressing lesbians.’ which is incredibly thoughtless and stupid of them to say considering queer history and how many lesbians are trans, considering how many of my minthara mutuals on twitter fall under the trans umbrella.

the lesbophobia got called out, rightfully.

i then said that i’m uncomfortable with the way halsin’s va interacts with the nsfw stuff in the fandom and it kinda gives me the creeps. yknow, on my own tweet, on my own account, not a single halsin account in sight. and since i’m a lesbian (and my personal history) it seems pretty normal to me to be uncomfortable with men being all nsfw like that’s not my scene thx. anyway, their little group found it and said i was targeting his ga and bring him into the drama (which i really wasn’t i was expressing personal feelings on my own account but aight.)

cue the ‘supporting halsin is anti-lesbian.’ and ‘if you like halsin you’re being “creepy” because all male sexuality is creepy to them, and halsin’s va, dave, supporting halsin’s sexuality obviously pisses them off.’ which is a wild thing to say. we never brought dave into it, it was them that did that. my tweet had nothing to do with the drama they kept making go on by not shutting up about it. by this point minthara lovers were back to normal tweeting and only reacting to whatever of those drama tweets showed up on the timeline.

oh! and here comes the inevitable: we all got called terfs. most of us fall somewhere under the trans umbrella. i’m agender myself. but we’re terfs to that person apparently. lesbians always get called terfs, no matter what.

i’m sure there’s more insane shit they’ve said in private.

all of that just because we got pissy at halsin sending minthara to a fate worse than death when none of what she did in act 1 was of her own free will.

[jsealand]

Trying to organize my season 4 Umbrella Academy thoughts (easier said than done with my audhd brain) and this is what I’ve got:

There were actually moments I enjoyed, but I think the things I didn’t like far outweighed the ones I did. Other people have covered those things pretty extensively—dropped storylines that don’t make sense to have been dropped (it’s kind of tradition in this show to drop some things, but there are others that at least need to be addressed if they aren’t going to be shown), characters acting entirely out of character (and not in a ‘people are complex and full of contradictions’ kind of way, but in a ‘the writers/creators wanted to force a storyline and it really shows, and also they straight up told us so’ kind of way), etc—so I won’t go into those.

(Here there be SPOILERS)

What I do want to explore my feelings on is the ending. It bothered me in a way I couldn’t quite put my finger on until I saw someone point out that it basically says ‘you were born wrong and the world is better off without you’, which is going to resonate in a familiar bad way with a lot of fans in a lot of marginalized groups.

I understand that because of the way the story began, the ‘born wrong’ part is true in a literal sense, in that dozens of people were forced to give birth, suddenly and violently, with no way to consent to any part of the process. Not the fault of the kids in any way, EDIT: but not really an acceptable way to end the series, either. [Actually, I take this back, because on further reflection it would mean arguing that children born from tragic or violent circumstances just shouldn’t exist. I can argue that we need to work toward a world in which those circumstances don’t happen anymore, but I won’t accept that people who already exist because of it should cease to exist. Fuck that noise. Move forward and work with the present, don’t try to change the past. And I get how with a time travel show that seems contradictory, but it isn’t: they already exist, therefore they deserve to *have existed*]

The ‘world is better off without you part’ is complete and utter bs—better off without marigold, yes, but not our beloved misfits—but I can’t think of a feasible way to have them in the world without their traumatic marigold births (it’s always bothered me in shows/movies when a character visits another timeline and sees their kids as someone else’s biological kids—NOT how it works—so I don’t think we could see them walking around in that park after having been born normally and living normal lives).

So, I understand why we got the basic plot of the ending. I don’t like that it’s the answer, but I understand it. What I absolutely *hate* is that we don’t have any positive resolutions for the Hargreeves. I think that’s the one thing the vast majority of fans could agree that we wanted from the ending and we really didn’t get it. (I’m sure there are people out there making arguments about how they at least went out together or the flowers popping up was a nice homage or something, but that’s not enough of a payoff of watching them go through hell for three and a somethingth seasons.)

Hence, my idea for what could have salvaged at least some of our feelings for season 4 (but not the fivela: that can rot in the rubbish heap of forced and unnecessary plotlines from which it sprung): we have the park scene and see our fan favorites enjoying their normal, peaceful lives—with the addition of some that were snubbed for whatever reason—and then we zoom out to see that this is being watched on the tv in Klaus’s afterlife (recognizable somehow, but maybe a little cozier and prettier) and there are the siblings all hanging out together, happily sharing pizza and squabbling cheerfully, and as we slowly zoom out further we see other people—Dave, standing behind a couch, hands Klaus a soda or something; Sloane leans over Luther’s shoulder and kisses his cheek; the other Sparrows are playing Twister or something else physical but fun; Grace and Pogo are laughing together as they… play chess, maybe? And even Reggie and Abigail are there, off to the side, smiling (Abigail benevolently, Reggie wistfully because he hasn’t quite earned a spot in the crowd yet—but we’ve seen glimpses of his ability to, so I think he’ll get there someday, especially with Abigail’s guidance). We continue to zoom out and we see all the people who might have been, but never were, and they’re together and happy. (The precedent was set in s3, after all, with Klaus’s mom having watched him all his life, despite not having even been his mom in that particular timeline.) And maybe we zoom back in to just our Hargreeves, and a teenage girl in a striped dress is sitting on a bike and looking at Klaus with annoyed resignation, but when he waves her over and offers her some pizza, she pauses for a moment, looks around at the others who are also offering—a soda, a spot on a couch, some chips, etc—and then smiles a tiny, barely-there, reluctant smile, and joins them for lunch.

[ghostingtheconflict]

Prologue:

Breaking The Bank: Part 2

(The C.C.C apoligizes for any inconviniences about glitches or misplacements you may find reading. We are working on fixing issues as we speak.)

Ah, sunny days with a nice humidity and clouds for shades in the sky.

A perfectly nice day by all means but why does it feel like something is wrong ?

Maybe Charles forgot something ?

Headset ? Check. Keys ? Check ? Personal stuff like ID and Money just in case of anything ? Check.

Huh. Weird, he actually got the pen he promised to return to Calvin too. So what could it be ? What was missing ?

Maybe he'll remember later while he checks for any new assigments or missions with the General. He usually does by that point, either that or he forgets completely about it.

Oh well no time like the present am i right ?

-------------------------------------------------------

Elsewhere. A man wakes up in cold sweat from a recurring nightmare. Although 'recurring' might be a exageration.

Dmitri has been having weird dreams for a while in his life. But nothing too noteworthy of anything. But today was different.

Today he saw a nightmare of his complex in absolute shambles. It was far too real for it to be paranoia or the likes.

He remembers exactly the last time he had a similar dream. One so real that it manifested in reality. One at the beginning of his time as a warden.

And at the center of it all was the same person of before.

This will not do. This will not stand. He needed precautions Now.

He gets out of his bed and starts to walk to his office. The guards already used to some of his whims pay no mind and continue their job. Good.

Grigori as well was already working (or maybe the man hadn't gone to sleep) and simply looked up from his desk as he saw his boss approaching.

"Another one ?" Grigori states.

"Not just any. Him again." He saw as his eyes morphed into shock in an instant, before quickly going back to a more neutral, albeit worried expression.

"What did you see in it Dmitri. Is it any worse ?"

"Not just worse. My life will be in ruins if we don't act." Most normal people would assume by this point that the warden wasn't someone that was. Ok. In the head. But not with Grigori. The man had witnessed and experience a lot over the years working for Dmitri. He had been there for the first incident. He wouldn't leave his post now.

"Than we will have a long talk on what we must do. If you're dream has enough details, and i know it does. Than we may be able to spot any flaws in it as well that we'll have to patch to prevent the scenario." And indeed it will. They had a long night to talk through this somewhat prophetic vision.

One thing however was clear. They would not let Henry Stickmin do his little destruction as he did before.

-------------------------------------------------------

Talking about the man, or rather the stick. Let's see what he is up to.

Henry had it under control a few minutes ago. Really ! He did !

So how the hell is he still exactly in the same spot and holding his arms up against the police like in the original timeline ??

This sucks. At least he got to see fun new options. Honestly he was starting to consider going back to Revenged and die before this happened. Even if he doesn't know what he or maybe the C.C.C broke to do this.

But oh well. He doesn't Need to go to prison right away after all. He coooould go back and check the other 3 fails before going foward again anyway.

He wonder what he should choose.

Breaking The Bank: Concluded

Rank: Here Again ?

Bios: 0/??

Achivements: 0/??

Try from beginning ? Next

Ċ̵̞.̷͍͊C̸͙͛.̷͇̀C̵̨͆ ̷̘̄a̵̟͝p̵̛̙ǫ̴͝l̶͈̓i̸͈͠g̷̛̝ȉ̶̢ž̷̮é̶͜s̷̘̉ ̶͈͛f̷̬͋o̸̩̒r̵̂ͅ ̴̭̅a̵̘͋n̴͓͘y̷̧̿ ̵̰͌i̵͔̚n̴̳̓c̴̰̆ȍ̶̰ṋ̴̈́v̶̱͐i̷̪̍n̵͍̆ȉ̷̝ë̵̹́n̸̙͂c̸̗͠e̴͔͝ ̵̲̒y̸̭͂o̵̫̕ǘ̴͙ ̸̠̆m̷͖͌ą̷̑ŷ̶͇ ̸̥͘h̴͈̔a̸̱͂v̶̨͛ȇ̷̱ ̶̪͌w̶̺̌h̸̨͆i̴̛̙l̶̯̑e̷̻̔ ̷͓̈́ạ̶́r̵͉͋c̴̣̄h̸͖́i̶̢͝v̴̪̐î̶̜n̴̠͛g̷̤̈́ ̵͙̇y̸͇͒o̷͉̿ū̸̱'̸͎̎r̸͎̅e̸̳̍ ̶̤̄p̷̖͗r̶̝̅ǒ̴̳g̴̣̕r̴̟̆e̷̗̒s̸̙͋s̴̤͝.̴̮́ ̴͚̽W̴̪̌é̵̩ ̸̯̀a̸̘͊r̵̩͛e̴̙̊ ̶͓̓w̸̡͑ò̴̠r̶͓͂ǩ̵̳i̴̬̓n̵͓̋g̶̃ͅ ̸̠̚o̷͓͐ǹ̵̦ ̵̦̇f̷̋͜i̴̞̚x̴̝́i̶̮͂n̷͕͝ḡ̵̰ ̷̯̍ä̶͔́n̵͍͂y̷̼̌ ̶̄ͅi̶̛̼s̷̲̀ś̸̱u̷̢͛e̶̩͂s̴͕͝ ̶̮͝a̸̞͑s̵̫͊ ̷̩̀w̵̧̍ê̷̟ ̶͓̽s̸̨̃p̷̪̃e̸̯͆a̸̟̍k̴̬̓.̷̡̔

[sburbian-sage]

First of all, thank you. I'm not sure you remember me, because while I tried to aim for relatively soon after my last message, all my computer is willing to confirm is that this will reach you at some point after you advised me on getting the Sand roleplay coefficient up and shattered my faith in a co-player, but before other points somewhere on the timeline of the universe. (I should clarify those are both good things. See, I thought I was struggling because I sucked at Sand, but turns out I was struggling because I sucked at Sand AND because I was trusting someone whose advice was actively making me worse.)

I do also have a question, probably not life-or-death this time. See, I've made a grudging truce with the concept of weird language shit, and I'm really confused by the metaphors in this game. Like, in a way I don't think is just a me problem. For example, I find the Blood aspect's meaning mostly intuitive, but according to the trolls in my session, blood's metaphorical role in their culture was more about organization, division, and/or getting fucked over by life, though they eventually got it on an intellectual level. Meanwhile, I've figured Breath out on an intellectual level but I feel deep in my soul that having it stand for destruction is some absolute bullshit. Both of us have cultural dissonance with the system of metaphors the game has thrust upon us.

So is there any known sburb-playing society for whom ALL the aspects are metaphorically intuitive? It's not humans, it's not trolls, I haven't interacted with the other player species much, but is the target audience of this shitshow known or did I just unearth/rediscover another fucking Sburb Mystery?

In my honest opinion, Blood as organization mostly gels (pun not intended) with Troll's cultural conception of blood considering that their Hemospectrum is an organizational system that promotes social cohesion with the roles of one's own caste. It's a bad organizational system, don't get me wrong, and the caste-specific roles are bullshit, but it fundamentally is about consolidation (though the invulnerability and creation of life is completely dissonant). And if Breath-as-destruction sounds off to you, think of how the winds erode the mountains over centuries, or how much absolute havoc hurricanes wreak. Maybe that's a stretch, but it makes a sort of sense to me. Though I am still willing to admit that some of the associations are loose, or that the designers seemingly put several mildly-to-not-very related associations in one Aspect.

But to answer your actual question, no, I am unaware of any species or society for whom all Aspects are metaphorically intuitive. This might have something to do with the fact that SBURB's actual creators are unknown. On Earth, most copies come from SkaiaNet, a company whose origin is completely unknown, seemingly having ocme out of literal nowhere, whose only purpose for existing is to make SBURB happen. But on Alternia (and some iterations of Earth), it's made by some solo auteur, most of the time seemingly having found some ancient crypts containing mysterious runes or symbols or slabs or grimoires, which they then translated and used to create the game's code. A process which, if they were the player, they seemingly don't remember much of what happened, as if they were possessed while doing it. But who left those crypts and code? Assuming we even know where the discs came from.

Some people theorize that the creation of SBURB is a sort of paradox. It's some mystic "here's my conception of the universe" stuff, where time is a circle and the final session of SBURB will result in the creation of the first universe to receive SBURB, making it a self-perpetuating thing with no actual point of origin (hence paradox). I don't put much stock into any of the fake religions people made after playing SBURB (or for that matter, any of the fake religions made before SBURB), but this does answer your question. There is exactly one culture for whom all of SBURB's Asepcts and mythology is intuitive. And it's replayer culture.

[nostalgia-tblr]

it's not a plot hole if you do it on purpose

okay but there's a few "anti sylki" takes about at the mo which are converging in my head to form Wait I Think That Might Be How Whatever S2's Plot Is Gets Resolved and i am gonna splurge that onto a tumblr post because alas there is nobody around to stop me. And I shall be using screencaps to illustrate because everyone enjoys looking at hot people, right?

we shall start with the following sub-tumble: this bit of touching causing a nexus event is not actually a plot hole. we have indeed established that you don't get those things in an apocalypse, as proved by the fact that they didn't cause one just by arriving on Lamentis (neither of them is "supposed" to be on this timeline). by the rules we've been given thus far there should be no possible way for anyone to cause a nexus event here. certainly not by holding hands, ffs!

that's why everyone in this shot looks so surprised! WTF! "that's not someone stepping on the wrong leaf!" yelps mobius, who knows what to expect in such scenarios. he has spied an obvious plot hole and it shocks him! but for now we don't need to know how that impossible nexus event happened because for the short-term plot this is gonna get those damn variants 'safely' back to the TVA.

they are brought in and immediately separated. this is (maybe) important! they will not be in the same room together until near the end of the episode, which means no touching or doing any other gooey emo stuff at each other.

when they do reunite we discover that The Time-Keepers Don't Real. shocking twist! Oh no, Sylvie despairs as her years-long plan to bring down the TVA falls to roboty pieces around her!

And to sub-tumble again: I absolutely agree that Loki is having A Thought here about something Mobius said to him earlier in the episode. To wit: "the nexus event the two of you caused, whatever that connection is, can bring this whole place down." Mobius - who as we recall knows that the nexus event on Lamentis should not have happened - reckons that whatever the fuck that was must be pretty powerful. and he has a point (maybe). if holding hands can cause an impossible nexus event in an apocalypse what would happen if they got handsy and/or emotional at each other inside the TVA itself?

'Fear not, Sylvie, for I have worked out how to bring this motherfucking place down! Maybe those dudes were robots BUT we can still fix this because... um...' ALAS this is going to require some actual Feels to be expressed D: D: Loki awkwardly attempts to lead into this by explaining the theory: "We will figure this out. [...] Because, uh… Well, back on Lamentis…" Eventually he gives up and seemingly decides to just go right for the Declaration Of Feels.

OOPS, NOW HE'S FUCKIN DEAD, guess they won't be bringing down the TVA after all. Note that after all this we see a fair bit of nexus-tempting touchy-feely stuff but (BUT!) it all happens outside of the TVA and outside of normal time (whatever the heck normal time even is). And it seems you really can't cause a nexus event there.

And here I stop with one simple observation: Mobius's theory that getting your ship on with yourself can break whatever the TVA is remains untested and thus not proven wrong. This whatever-it-is might still destroy the weird agency that controls everything. Now that I have gone to all the effort of doing this post it probably won't but it might.