#someone else could NOT fix him if he didnt want to be fixed. hes trying to be better for the ones he loves even when his default is to
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
character inspirations is always a hard question for me since fuck if i know who specifically inspired this idiot i am always starting with an array of archetypes & traits unrelated to any One character
I've actually always hated the, "stoic rogue-like "I'm Fine" gruff man" type i find the way they get written to usually be so a love interest can Appear and Fix Him against his will usually and its tends to be very shallow, uninteresting, and forced to me. maelgwyn ended up in that genre of character due to the bread crumb trail i followed while making him over the past few years.
I needed a character to use the lvl 80 boost included with my expansions on, ranger looked a safe bet, sylvari seemed fun to design. I made Maelgwyyn in like 30 minutes, using colors i already knew i liked to safeguard against getting bored playing him. > I got my ass beat in H.o.T. on one of my charas, didnt understand the profession i was playing so i took a break and leveled a character to 80 instead to get the hang of the game > I went into P.o.F. for the raptor w/ maelgwyn and fell in love with the story of pof + lws4, loved the desert and the designs and EVERYTHING, it's still my favorite expansion set. > i associated the crystal desert with maelgwyn so hard, i knew i had to Put Him There somehow. > slowly but surely "oh he was a lonely character because he was sylvari in this land" he was max height and i kept seeing him be taller than every other character i spotted in game near him so i made it canon, he's 8'3." > "hes older than the pale tree BUT it doesnt mean that much due to all The Horrors" > "what if more sylvari"
so on and so forth until it snowballed into a subspecies and OCs i intend on taking with me far into the future even if i end up "leaving" gw2 behind one day.
#ocposting#gwynnie isn't 'i can fix him' he's 'wow how the fuck do I love myself when ive never felt that before consistently in a safe environment'#because 99% of his mental issues were based off my own.#hes not someone who doesnt try to fix himself hes someone easily blinded easily numb easily avoidant to their own problems in regards to#mental health hes not looking for easy fixes hes looking for anything that can ease the pain#he finds genuine love in jasmeen and later his [partner] who is either trahearne or one of my friends ocs#someone else could NOT fix him if he didnt want to be fixed. hes trying to be better for the ones he loves even when his default is to#sulk off and suffer until its done and hes 'alive' again
7 notes
·
View notes
Note
The thing that is out of place in the episode to me is sun crying about solar's death. They never were close. The most that can be considered bonding between them is when solar turned into a candy corn and when they had guys night with moon which is off screen. solar was mean to sun that one time. so for sun to cry and have a hard time breaking the news to lunar and earth is just so out of place. I don't have any other words for it. Just out of place
"They were never close" That we know of! We know Earth had her offscreen time with Solar. And while we dont see sun and Solar interact a lot, it's clear enough that Sun still cared. while We got more Moon and Solar vibin then Sun and Solar despite Solar's whole being his own Sun to thank (also i just think its literally due to one voiceactor voicing both, there IS limitations here and there). But i think thats enough implication. But Sun still liked Solar, he was well aware Moon and Solar were besties. He still hung out with solar, Solar was family to him too. But sun taking it upon himself to tell Lunar and Earth is a mercy to moon too in a sense. Plus like... voiceactor wise itd be best. I get canonly we didnt get a lot but like implication wise- I think its fair.
#i get it seems out of place. but just cause ur not AS close as someone else doesnt mean u cant grieve#and even if they werent that very close its still devastating the guy u know who could fix everything#was a better version of someone you knew and your siblings loved and cherished just dies??? youd have feelings about it!#solar even called them FAMILY...#ive seen people talk about solar keeping his distance due to his own feelings on his sun#vs his moon where he WANTED to overwrite that with someone who didnt hurt him#this is could be explained betetr BUT ANYWAY#sun grieving and trying to be strong for moon is good!!!#sun and moon show spoilers
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
need you now
in which an impulsive voicemail leads to some secrets being spilled.
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader. warnings/tags: angst (sorry iâm incapable of being nice lol) hurt/comfort tho!! lil bit of fluff too because i AM capable of being nice, alcohol consumption as a coping mechanism (iâm literally just a girlâŠ) spencer and reader are broken up :( but theyâre still sooo in love and itâs soo obvious so itâs fine!! (also it kind of gets fixed at the end-ish. youâll see *evil smirk*) reader cries a lot (real) spencer is a cutie (as always) spencer and reader sleep togetherâŠno like literally, not in a funny business way, some swearing, no use of y/n!!! wc: 3k a/n: hihihi!! so this is my first fan fiction iâve wrote and completed ever (gulp) itâs also my first time publishing one (gulp) my writing could definitely be better and so could my grammar tbh but i HOPE if you choose to read youâll enjoyâŠfeedback is always appreciated (plsplspls) also like requests?? if anyoneâs into thatâid love to write more but inspo is difficult sometimes. if thereâs any spelling mistakes im sorry, eye am very tired!! itâs 5am *eye twitching* okay iâm going to sleep, gootbye IF U SAW ME EDITING THIS 5 TIMES NO U DIDNT (iâm bad at tumblr ok..)
âHi. This is Doctor Spencer Reid. Iâm not available right now, but leave a message and Iâll get back to you as soon as I canâŠâ
His tinny voice cut off to make way for the signature beep of the beginning of a voicemail recording.
You could hang up nowâyou should hang up now, save yourself some dignity and go drown your sorrows in alcohol like a normal person instead of calling your ex-boyfriend.
You should, but your mouth was opening before your finger could reach the hang-up button, andâŠand it was a losing battle from the moment you clicked on Spencerâs icon.
âUhâhi, itâsâŠitâs me.â You huffed out a sad laugh.
âSo, um, IâŠI tried calling, but you didnât answer soâŠâ The static buzz of silence hummed through your ear, just inches from where you held your phone with a shaky grip. âmaybe youâre on a case or out with friends, or someone elseââ You let the implication hang in the airâthe thought of Spencer potentially being in a relationship bringing a lump to your throat.
You swallowed it down.
âI justâŠI just had an unbelievably shitty day, Spence.â You sniffed, wiping the moisture that had escaped from your eye with your sweater sleeve. âI know youâve never read A Series of Unfortunate Events but I think Iâd give those kids a run for their money.â You tried to laugh but it came out as more of a sob.
You inhaled shakily, trying to collect yourself and remember why on earth you thought it would be a good idea to call Spencer when youâd been broken up for months. Hell, you hadnât heard from him at all since you had parted waysâexcept from the odd text about returning each othersâ things. It was obvious he had moved on, and here you were, filling up his voicemail with blubbering messages and making references to adolescent books.
âGod, sorry about this.â You breathed out a watery chuckle. âI justâŠdidnât want to be alone, I guess. But thatâs-um-not your problem anymore, so IâmâIâm sorry. Have a nice night.â Your voice cracked and you hung up before you could start weeping down the line. You didnât need to look even more pathetic.
You pulled your phone away from your ear, looking down at his contact photo through blurred vision. He was smilingânot the tight, closed lip smile he gave other people, but a full, bright smile that had his dimples showing. One of your hands was wrapped loosely around his neck and the other was holding your phone just far enough away to capture both of your smiles. Your head was rested on top of his shoulder, tilted just slightly to the left so your temple was brushing against his.
It felt like looking at a vintage photographâyou knew those people and their happiness existed at some point in time, but it wasnât tangible; you couldnât verify it was real.
When you were with Spencer, you never doubted how real it was. All you had to was look at him across the room and heâd flash you a smile identical to the one in that photo and youâd justâŠknow.
It felt like forever ago now that youâd been on the receiving end of that grin and it killed you. So much so that before you could consider the repercussions, you were trudging through to your kitchen and grabbing the bottle of whiskey that sat unopened in your cabinet. It had been a presentâfrom Rossi, actually. When Spencer had first introduced you to the team, the older man had given it to you as something of a welcome gift. Of course, he couldnât have known you werenât much of a drinker, and since you wanted to make a good impression (and because you were sure it had cost more than all the alcohol you had consumed in your life combined) you accepted itâdeciding to save it for a rainy day.
You think this qualified.
You grabbed the bottle, a glass, and padded back through to your living room, slumping onto your couch. You filled your glass up a little less than halfway before gulping it down, enjoying the burn in your throatâit was better than the constant thickness.
You poured yourself another glass before turning on the TV. You werenât sure what was playingâit didnât really matter anyway, your vision was already being obscured by tears again.
You thought the pounding was in your head at firstâserves you right for drinking half a bottle of whiskey. Only, it wasnât, because moments later the pounding subsided and instead, your apartment door was opening, casting your pitch-black living room in a yellow glow which temporarily blinded you.
You squeezed your eyes shut, your mind hazyâagain, serves you right for drinking half a bottle of whiskey. Someone was calling your name, but there was too much sensory input for you to make out who.
You certainly hoped it wasnât a paramedicâmaybe your neighbour had heard you sobbing for the last four hours and decided you needed a wellness check. Then there were hands on your face, and that had you flicking your eyes open, because you recognised those handsâimpossibly soft, with a callus on his trigger finger being the only thing to mar them. Spencer.
âSpencer?â You slurred.
He sighed in exasperation (or relief) and tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear.
âAre you alright? You werenât answering your phone, I thoughtâŠâ He trailed off, worry evident in his voice.
You sat up then, trying to compose yourself even though the room was spinning. Fucking whiskey. You rubbed your eyes haphazardly, blinking until you could finally see.
You shouldâve stayed bleary-eyed. Because nothing could prepare you for the way your breath hitched when you finally saw him. After months of not seeing each other, Spencer was here, sitting on your couch, and he was looking at you like you were something fragile, andâGod, you needed another drink. You turned away from him, reaching for the neck of the bottle as you spoke.
âIâm fine.â
Before you could lift it up, Spencer gently pried your hand away from the bottle with his own, and then slid it across the coffee table with his other.
âYouâre drunk. No more of that, please.â His tone wasnât unkind, but he left no room to argue. You probably wouldâve objected anyway, if it werenât for the way he kept his hand clasped around yours, rubbing soothing circles into your pulse point almost absentmindedly.
You glanced up to himâto stop yourself from staring at your hand in his and how natural it felt, more than anythingâbut that proved to be a mistake too, because he looked just as beautiful as thirty seconds prior and it felt just as natural for him to be sitting next to you on your sofa, but it wasnât natural anymore.
âHow did you get in?â
âMy key.â
âOh.â
Right. The key that he still had because you refused to meet up with him to let him return it. He tried for weeks to contact you, but you ignored him, because getting the key back meant things were finally over. You supposed he could return it nowâmaybe thatâs why he came in the first place.
âWhy did you come?â You asked, your voice impossibly small.
âYou called.â He repliedâas though he was talking about something as simple as the weather. You call and I come.
You searched in his eyes for any sign of a lie, but of course, there was none. He was being completely genuineâas always. You were the awful ex-girlfriend who left concerning voicemails on his phone and had him travelling to your apartment in the middle of the night only for him to look completely okay with the situationâlike there was nothing heâd rather be doing than making sure you were safe.
You couldnât help the way tears sprung to your eyes or your lip began to tremble as you lolled your head back onto the couch, pulling your gaze away from his.
âAngel, whatâs wrong?â
You liked to consider yourself to be a strong person. You had been through things in your life that were objectively worse than your breakup with Spencer, but something about the gentleness of his tone and the way he had let one of his many (past) petnames for you slip had your throat tightening and you ducked your head into your one handâthe other still seized by Spencerâsâto try and muffle a sob.
âHey,â He trailed his hand that was wrapped around yours up your arm, all the way to your shoulder blade before lightly guiding you towards him. You donât have enough energy in you to fight his magnetic pull, so you shuffle over until you can bury your head into his shirt. You inhale his scent; vanilla, neroli, and so him it makes you ache.
Stopping your tears is futileâyouâd know, theyâd barely ceased all nightâso you just let them fall, seeping into Spencerâs tie as he rubs one hand softly up and down your back, the other cradling the crown of your head.
His breathing is quiet and slowâthe exact opposite of yoursâand you try to imitate itâforcing air into your lungs. When your sobbing has turned to shaky breathing and the occasional sniffle, he speaks up.
âDo you want to talk?â
Talk about what? About what had happened todayâwhat had led you to calling him? Talk about how for the last few months, he had been the only person you had wanted to call?
âNo.â You hated how pitiful you sounded.
âOkay.â
Spencer didnât say anything else for a minuteâyour synchronised breathing being the only thing to stop the room from falling into dead silence.
âYou need to rehydrate.â He murmured, smoothing down your hair.
You hummed into him, in no hurry to unwrap yourself from his body. You probably wouldnât get to be this close to him again, after all.
He moved both of his hands to your biceps, pulling you back slightly so you could look at him. He knitted his brows together in a silent plea which had you rolling your eyes petulantly, your lashes still damp from tears.
âFine.â You peeled yourself off of him, pushing yourself into a standing position. Horrible mistake. You were still incredibly drunk, turns out, and everything was spinning a little bit and come to think of it, you were also nauseous andâ
âCareful, lovely.â Spencer placed his hand firmly on the small of your back, keeping you upright.
andâactually, you were fine now.
He stood too, moving his hand just slightly over to your waist so he could guide you to the kitchen. When he knew you could stand uprightâeven if you were relying mostly on the counter behind youâhe grabbed a glass from your cabinet, moving around effortlessly to pour you some water. The sight was so domestic you almost wanted to cry again. Maybe in some alternate timeline, where you and him couldâve worked, this would be an every day thingâminus the drunk sobbing part, of course.
He handed you the glass of water, watching as you took a few sips. He raised an eyebrow, nodding his head slowly.
âWhole thing, please.â
You let out an exasperated (affectionate) sigh and gulped the rest of it down, setting it on the counter behind you.
âHappy?â
âVery.â
You smirked, trailing your gaze down his body. He was still in his work clothes which, at the very least, meant he wasnât on a date before he came here. He always changed before datesâwell, for you, anyway. You wondered if he had been on any dates since the breakupâyou certainly hadnât. It had been long enough now that it wouldnât be weird for you to start seeing other peopleâbut you didnât want to. You werenât sure youâd ever want to, to be completely honest.
The more you thought about it, the more the whole thing seemed stupid. You didnât want anyone else, you wanted Spencer. You had tried to get over him but if tonight was any indicationâit clearly wasnât working. You canât even remember why you broke up in the first placeâit all seemed so insignificant now. No amount of pain you had ever experienced in your relationship had come close to that of living without him.
You met his eyes once more and it was like he could see the question brewing. He tried to stop you, calling your name in a quiet warning, but you ignored him.
âWhy did we break up?â
He frowned, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth with his tongue in that maddening way he did.
âIâyou know whyââ
âNo, but I donât! I know things were difficult sometimes but that doesnât mean it didnât work. It workedâwe worked.â Your eyes were stinging again.
Spencer pressed his index and middle finger into his eye, furrowing his brows.
âI know, I know we worked, angelâbut you were sad all the time, remember? I was gone so often and it wasnât good for you.â His true emotions were indecipherable but his tone was soft, and you wished you could be as calm about this as him. Did he just not care as much as you did?
âBut ItâsâItâs worse nowââ You choked out, tears falling freely now. âI was sad when you were gone, but you always came backâyou donât come back anymore.â
Spencer removed his hand from his face, flexing it at his side like he was uncertain what to do with himself before taking a stride towards you. He brought a hand to your face, wiping the tears from under your eyes delicatelyâlike you were made of porcelain.
âListen, sweetheartâalcohol affects your ability to regulate your emotions and I know right now it might feel worse but that doesnât mean it alwaysââ
ïżœïżœïżœSpencer, stop! Itâs not the fucking alcohol, I miss you! I miss you all of the time! Evenâeven when Iâm having a good dayâI still want youâand especially when Iâwhen I have a bad dayââ You choked out through heaving breaths.
âBreathe.â He urges, cupping your cheek. And youâre so, so angry, and sad, and tired that you have no choice but to shut up and listen to him. When youâve adequately calmed down, he moves his hand to your jaw, tilting your head up to look at him.
âI donât think we should talk about this tonight but Iââ You open your mouth to protest.
âI promise we can talk about it tomorrow when youâre soberâif you still want to.â
Your lip trembles of its own volition and you frown.
âOf course I want to.â
âOkay,â
âOkay.â
He gives your eyes a final wipe before heâsârather unexpectedlyâpulling you into a hug. You all but melt into him, your head finding its home in his sternum and your arms wrapping around his middle. He tilts his head down, kissing the top of your headâand youâre certain you canât let this go again. You will chain him down before Spencer leaves this apartment again.
Everything is wordless from thereâmostly because youâre so, so exhausted that even talking seems like too difficult a task. Spencer helps you find something more comfortable to change into and you pull out an old t-shirt of his and a pair of plaid pyjama pants you had kept here for him. I guess your keeping them âjust in case you needed them in the futureâ had come in handy, after all.
As you washed your face, Spencer snuck through to the kitchen, refilling your water and grabbing two aspirin in a not-so-subtle attempt to help the inevitable hangover you were going to have in the morning.
You caught him placing them on your bedside table and mock gasped.
âTrying to drug me in my sleep so you can make a run for it in the night?â
He grinned lazilyâexhaustion creeping up on him as well.
âI wouldnât dream of it.â
You smiled, flopping yourself onto your bed rather ungraciously. Spencer looked at you like you were something fascinating before biting his lip, clearly deep in thought.
âWhat?â You let out a self-effacing little chuckle.
âI was justâŠwonderingâŠif youâd like me to sleep on the couch?â
You probably shouldâve been more careful in your facial expressions considering you were still broken up but your thoughts about that offer were obvious.
âNo, stay.â Stay in your bed, in your apartmentâstay anywhere that was close to you.
Maybe you were coming on a little too strong.
âUnless you want to, I meanââ
âNo, noâIâll stay.â Forever, preferably.
He walked around to the other side of your bedâas he had done so many times beforeâand sat down, pulling the covers over his legs. You mirrored his movements before flicking your bedside lamp out, turning to face him.
You were a little thankful you were so out of it, because this had the potential to be very awkward otherwise. Spencer shuffled down so that he was at eye level with you, turning to face you as well.
You just stared for a moment, committing him to memory. The moonlight had a way of highlighting all the high points of his face, and the twinkle in his eyes, andâGod, you were so glad the moon existed and that Spencer was in your bed that you couldnât help but giggle.
âWhat?â Spencer laughed along with you, even though he had no idea what was so funny.
âNothing. Youâre pretty.â
âYouâre drunk. Go to sleep.â
âDonât wanna.â
âWhy?â
âScared youâll be gone when I wake upâlike I made it all up.â
Spencerâs smile faded then, and he looked at you with something that seemed so much like the one thing you had been willing yourself to stop doing the whole time that youâd been broken up, that it almost took your breath away.
âI wonât. I promised, didnât I?â
You nodded.
âSo thereâs nothing to worry about. Now get some sleep, lovely.â
You smiled, feeling Spencerâs hand inching towards yours. He intertwined them and gave yours a squeeze.
âJust in case you make a run for it in the night.â
You chuckled, your eyelids fluttering shut. Yeah, you could make it work.
part two!
#spencer reid#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x reader#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fanfiction#spencer reid angst#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid imagine#criminal minds
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
TIME TRAVELER AU PT 2
Original post/idea here. Part 1 is here. Part 3 is here.
Check out my MASTERLIST for more!
I fucked up.
You thought as you sat on the bed, holding your head in your hands.
I fucked up so baaaaaad.
Not only have you healed Baldwin of his leprosy, forever changing history of the LEPER KING, but also managed to somehow be his bride. To make matters EVEN worse, you cant just up and leave right now because you dont know the disastrous effects it'll have on the future now that Baldwin wont die of leprosy, which means that the kingdom of Jerusalem wont fall to Salauddin and his muslim army and after that its just a domino effect.
You tried to view your options here.
I stay here, marry Baldwin and fuck up the fabric of time and space because how can someone from the future marry someone from the past? Wouldnt I cease to exist?
I leave, return to my time where authorities arrest me for fucking around with time- that is, if I even exist in the future now that I've altered history. Who knows if my ancestors survived/were born after this?
No. Neither option is good. I need to stay here and fix this. But in a way that i dont draw too much attention to myself so that im so insignificant that nobody remembers, let alone writes about me in the history books.
You were drawn out of your thoughts with someone knocking on your door. "Come in." You said, straightening yourself.
A couple of servants walked in, all women. "Princess Y/n." They all courtesied. "We've been sent here by his majesty to prepare you for dinner with him."
Princess? Ah yes. Only a couple of hours ago, Baldwin had proposed to you, I guess the concept of asking wasnt a thing here as he just slipped on the big beautiful ring on your finger.
You narrowed your eyes at them. "First of all, Im not a princess. You will address me as Y/n only. And secondly, Im not going to join him for dinner, so there's no need to prepare me" The maids all shared a look of confusion before the head servant spoke.
"But we cant address you as anything else until you wed the king, after which you will be our queen, princess."
"Didnt I just tell you not to call me princess? Just call me Y/n!" The head maid shook her head. "Princess, we can not do that. If we do, then we would be punished. And we must prepare you for dinner with his majesty!" The maids moved ahead to start helping you but you raised a hand, halting them.
"I said, no." You said sternly.
"What... what will we tell the king, princess? He's expecting you-"
"Tell him i cant come because Im sic- no, Im not feeling well and Id like to be alone." You cant say "sick" in this era, because that means "death sentence" here and you dont want to be fretted over and bring attention to yourself as "the king's fiancee got SICK!". Besides, you do need to be away from Baldwin as much as possible and have some time to plot your moves.
-
You had pulled out your notebook and began writing out dates and historic events of this era to plan your escape. You're trying to find some sort of shortcut where Baldwin gets sick again and dies, leaving his kingdom in the hands of his sister and brother in law, who will bring its downfall-
Someone knocked on your door gently. "Princess?" You quickly hid your notebook. "Come in."
Baldwin walked inside and towards you, eyes worried as they scanned you up and down.
"I heard you're not feeling well?" He asked and before you had a chance to back away, he had cupped your cheeks in his hands tenderly. "What's wrong? Shall I fetch the royal physician?"
"No." You replied with your face smushed in his hands. "I'm fine." You pulled your face away his large hands.
Confusion spread through his blue orbs. "Then why did you not join me for dinner?" He asked, using a hand to push your hair over your ear, not taking the hint that you didn't want him touching you.
"I just-" what possible excuse could you come up with that would be both effective and not insulting enough to have your head chopped off. "you- you dont care about me."
Baldwin looked at you in bewilderment. "I dont... care about you? Princess, how can you say that?" He tried to cup your cheek again but you backed away before he could, putting on a face of hurt.
"How can I not? You dont care about what I want, or even ask me what I need?" You feingned pain in your voice, turning away from him for dramatic effect.
He grabbed your shoulders and turned you towards him, his pupils grew wide as if trying to search for what it is that you need. "My love, what do you want? Just say the word, and I'll give it to you."
You looked down, again for the theatrics, and Baldwin lifted your chin. "Go on."
"You never- never asked me to marry you."
"Huh? But I did today-"
"No, you stated it- demanded I marry you." You furrowed your brows and looked down again.
Baldwin smiled. Of course, how could he have not asked you? You were a girl after all, you want to be courted the traditional way. Its not your fault that you dont know that kings do not ask permission for things. They just get it, because who would refuse to marry a king?
He kissed your forehead, lifting your chin again to meet his eyes. "Im sorry, princess. I shouldve asked." He took your hands in his and had that charming smile again. "Will you marry me, Y/n?"
"No." You shook your head. "I... I cant marry you, your majesty." You said, adding tears into your eyes. His brows furrowed in concern.
"What? Why?" You tried pulling your hands away but he didnt let go, tightening his grip ever so slightly.
"I-" well, you could say that youre not catholic and the church would never let you two get married, but you also dont wanna be tortured for being a "heretic". Maybe religious differences could be the last plan. Taking your silence as hesitance, Baldwin spoke. "I can offer you everything and more. Jerusalem would be yours. What is it that I lack that anyone else could offer?"
"I am not a good match for you!" Ah yes, lets do the typical "its not you, its me." You bit your lip as you yanked your hands out of his and walked towards the window, your back to him (theatrics). "You and I are not equals- no we are nowhere close! Youre a king, your father was a king, your family is royalty. I come from nothing, as did my ancestors. There will never be stability in our marriage when we come from such different backgrounds!" You never thought that you would be putting yourself down and call yourself "inferior" to break up with a man.
Silence hung in the air, as you held your breath.
"Youre right." You heard him say behind you. "We are not equals, we never will be." For some reason, instead of being relieved, a chill ran down your spine. Baldwin wrapped his arms around you, resting his head on your shoulder. "I may be a king, but youre far superior to me. You're an angel, sent to me by God, and you saved me. I wouldnt be king anymore if you werent here, princess."
Warmth spread from your cheeks to the tip of your ears, both due to the close proximity and his words. Sensing your bashfulness, he chuckled, kissing your cheek as he turned you around to face him. You could hear your own heart beat at how close he was.
Baldwin tilted his head, half lidded eyes staring at you. "Youre everything and more that I could ask for, princess. Never put yourself down and compare yourself to me, hm?" He said, giving your arms a gentle squeeze before moving away, but not detaching himself completely as he took ahold of your hand and looked back at you.
"Now that this is settled, let us go eat. I've had the servants prepare a feast for us and then we can discuss wedding arrangements-" shit shit shit shit shit fuck it!
"I'm not catholic!" Baldwin halted at that. You've already said it, might as well dig yourself a deeper hole. You let the tears form in your eyes. "Im... Muslim. I didnt tell you because I didnt want you to think I was working for Salauddin and spying on you for him, you know I wasnt! I really did only want to know about you. Please believe me, I wasnt-"
"I believe you."
What? Just like that.
"You- you believe me?" You breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you. Once again, Im sorry i didnt tell you I was a Muslim, but dont worry, I'll pack my things and leave tonight-"
"Why? We still have to get married."
You blinked slowly. "But... Im Muslim?"
Baldwin shrugged. "So? It doesnt change anything."
You looked at him in bafflement. "It does! It changes everything! We cant get married! Im a Muslim! The church wont allow interfaith marriages, and I dont intend on converting to catholicism either if thats what youre suggesting!"
"I am not suggesting that. You can be a muslim if you want to, but we're still getting married." Baldwin stated matter of factly.
"The church wont allow it-"
"The church will do as I say. I am the head of the church. Besides-" He smiled.
"I dont remember angels having to prove themselves to be a catholic. You saved my life, you cured my incurable disease. As far as the church is concerned, youre a miracle sent to me by God. Youre the Chosen One!"
Is he... is he hearing himself? Can you try to convince him?
"But... but Jerusalem deserves a Catholic Queen-" you tried weakly, but he cupped your cheek and smiled gently at you.
"I am Jerusalem, Y/n. And I deserve you." Was all he said before pecking your forehead.
He tugged you along with him. "Now, we have to eat."
You dont want to eat. You want to stay behind and think of another strategy because clearly you cant talk yourself out of this wedding.
"I'm- I'm not hungry." You said, making him frown.
"How is that possible? You havent had anything since morning. I dont want you getting sick before the wedding." Baldwin continued to pull you along.
Does he not listen?
"I dont want to eat- I- dont feel like it." You said a bit harshly this time, hoping he'd take the hint.
And he did, finally stopping. He sighed and let go of your hand. "Okay. I suppose if you really dont want to, we can skip dinner tonight." Fucking finally. "Its just... I seem to have developed a habit of enjoying meals with you. And now that my leprosy is cured and I have no more diet restrictions, I just- I had the kitchen prepare some of my favourite dishes that I was able to enjoy before my disease disabled me."
You stared at him. Is he- is he trying to guilt trip you? Baldwin once told you that due to leprosy he had ulcers in his mouth, and he couldnt eat different types of food, and was only able to have bland, soft goo.
You looked away from his big sad eyes. He's not getting to you. You need to go back to your room, make yourself scarce, be far away from him as often as possible.
"You can still go and eat dinner alone."
With one hand, he cupped your cheek. "Princess, you know I cant eat until you eat too. But its okay, if you dont want to eat, then I wont too. I guess I'll just have the servants finish the chicken roast and oh-! They even made strawberry cream cake for dessert. But- maybe another day."
You looked into his eyes, those blue orbs that were filled with sadness, resembling a kid who was just told "no candy!"
Sighing, you held his hand. "Maybe I can have a few bites."
His face lit up. Ah, he knew you'd come around. "Lets go!"
-
The next day, youre helped by the maids to get ready for the day. Apparently, Sibylla wanted to meet you and discuss some things, and you suspect she wants to talk about the wedding preprations.
The maids had prepared your bath and were very insistent on washing you themselves but you made them all leave the bath chambers. Finally, they compromised when you told them that they could dress you up if they wait outside.
Setting your old clothes on the bed, you entered the bathroom and settled into the warm water. The essential oils and flower petals soothed your mind and body, and you finally had some desperately needed silence to hear your own thoughts.
Last night at dinner, Baldwin was very- well, "happy" would be an understatement to how he felt near you. And all those forehead kisses and skin contact doesnt go unnoticed by you either. You suppose that since he had leprosy, he never really had or was allowed to touch anyone else. But now that hes cured, all thanks to your dumb ass, he craves the physical intimacy.
You closed your eyes as you sank deeper into the warm water. Gosh, did I really have to give him the water? Had I not done that, he would still be ridden with lepro-
Your eyes snapped open. Thats it. You just have to make sure he never drank your water in the first place! Yes! You can go back in time and sure, its always dangerous to go back in the same time period more than once, but you really dont have any other option now, do you?
After half an hour, you finally exited the bathroom and the maids practically ushered you to sit in the chair as they finally, FINALLY got to dress up the future queen of Jerusalem and after a whole hour, they're finally done. And... well you look good. Your hair has been done nicely, and a delicate golden headpiece, almost like a elegant hair band sits on top of your head. They added some color to your cheeks and lips with crushed berries. As for your clothes, they dressed you in a dark blue tunic with loose, flowing sleeves. The tunic itself was made of silk, probably brought in from the Byzantine empire and was only available to the upperclass of this time.
"I am not wearing those!" You said when they opened the jewellery boxes. There were diamonds and other precious stones adorning the earrings and necklaces.
"But princess, you must wear these. It is royal protocol for the king's bride to be, and the future queen to wear the royal jewels." The head maid said. She doesnt know that you dont plan on sticking around and if you leave wearing these jewels, who knows what havoc would that cause?
"No. I dont want to wear them."
The maids shared a look of concern. "What?" You asked them.
"Its just... his majesty picked these out for you himself. He would be mad at us if you were not wearing these." One of the younger servants spoke as she fumbled with her fingers. Through the mirror, you looked at everyone's worried expression. You doubt that someone as calm and collected as Baldwin would lose his marbles over his fiancee not wearing jewellery.
"I dont think the king would be mad at you if I dont wear some jewellery. He isnt one to get angry that easily, you know?" You said chuckling, but it died when you saw them share the same concerned looks again. This time, you turned away from the mirror to look at them directly. "What? Go on, no secrets."
Another maid mustered up the courage to mumble. "Well- it's just- the king- I mean- his majesty is calm but um-" she paused to look at the other maids for help but they all avoided eye contact. "Out with it." You said a bit sternly.
"His majesty... gets... emotional- yes, emotional! When it comes to matters concerning you."
"Emotional? What do you mean? Speak clearly, no word will get out of this room, I promise." You spoke all while glaring at the other maids to make them silently comply to not tattle on their friend.
The maid bit her lip. "His majesty... gets mad when he thinks that you're not being treated well." You gave her a look to continue. "A few weeks back, while you were strolling out in the garden, his majesty reprimanded some of his knights for not escorting you. He asked them why they weren't guarding you?"
A few weeks back? It may have made some sense for Baldwin to be protective of his bride to be, but you two weren't engaged until yesterday. And before that, his relationship with you was barely platonic, more like a king-servant thing.
"Tell her about the kitchen incident too." Another maid whispered.
"What kitchen incident?"
"Um, 2 months ago, when the kitchen had prepared a feast for his majesty, he almost fired the entire kitchen staff for serving olives with the entree." You gave them a quizzical look. "Well, his majesty had told them that you can't eat olives and had told them not to include it in the palace's food. But it was a feast to celebrate his victory and the staff thought it'd be best to add olives because the king likes them."
Your eyes widened at that. He almost fired the kitchen staff because you said you can't eat olives? I mean, it's not like you're deathly allergic, you just didn't like how tart they were and when Baldwin saw you picking them out on your plate, all you could manage to blurt out was that you can't eat them. Perhaps, he thought you had diet restrictions like him.
You huffed. That still didnt warrant such a reaction from him. "That isn't nice. Don't worry, I'll talk to him."
The maid looked at you in horror. "No! I mean, his majesty would not like that we- um..." she tried to come up with appropriate words that wouldn't be insulting. Her scrunched up face as she thought hard made you giggle.
"Fine, fine. I won't say anything to him. You have my word." You said, smiling at them assuringly.
The head maid then held out the pearl necklace to you. You sighed and nodded, and they all cheered as they started picking out the jewels for you.
Its okay. You told yourself. I can always drop them somewhere before time travelling.
-
As soon as you were dressed, one of Sibylla's lady-in-waiting came to fetch you. She hurried you, saying something along the lines of "you must see princess Sibylla right away!" And you couldn't stop her from pulling you along, so time travelling will have to wait.
"Princess Sibylla needs to see you right away, princess!" The maid said as she pulled you towards a room. Knocking on it, the door swung open and you were met with the sight of different gowns hanging on dummies with maids tending to them, and right in the center of the room was Sibylla, practically jumping on her heels.
"Y/n!" She yelled out as she ran towards you and engulfed you in a hug before her lady in waiting, the same one standing beside you, cleared her throat. It caught Sibylla's attention who gasped softly before backing away and immeadiately giving you a courtesy. "I mean, princess Y/n." You gave a nasty look to the lady in waiting before shaking your head at an embarrassed Sibylla. "You don't need to courtesy to me, princess Sibylla."
She immeadiately beamed. "Of course I do! You're not going to be just my sister in law, you're also going to be Queen of Jerusalem! Of course i bow to you."
Me, a queen? Yeah, we'll see about that.
"Still, I consider us friends before anything else." You offerer her a small smile. "You called for me?"
"Oh? Oh, yes!" She immeadiately grabbed your hand and pulled you further into the room. "I didn't know what colours and material you preferred, so I ordered them to bring everything with the best seamstresses in kingdom!" She pointed at the seamstresses, who bowed to you.
"But... I don't need clothes. I already have a wardrobe." Your statement made Sibylla laugh as did a few of her hand maidens.
"Ahh, you're so naive!" Sibylla giggled. "That wardrobe doesn't exist anymore. You're a princess, soon to be queen, you need a royal wardrobe!" She said as she dragged her hand over one of the gowns, feeling the material. "And! You still have to select your bridal gown!"
For the next 3 hours, Sibylla had the maids show you different gowns and materials, even helping by giving her input as to what would suit you.
"I still like my old clothes, they're quite comfortable." You sighed. Designing your new wardrobe was not something that needed your urgent attention at the moment. You need to return to your room and get the time machine from your old dress and leave this era.
Sibylla nods. "I understand what you're going through. I still remember how they burned away my entire wardrobe when I married Guy. But I suppose its poetic in a way. Since you're starting a new life, so why not start one by getting new clothes!"
Wait.
"They burnt all your old clothes?" Sibylla nods. "Mmhmm! In a way, you're burning away your past! And starting a new-" You didn't stick around as you immeadiately rushed out of the room and made your way towards your own.
You can't- your old clothes has your time machine. If they burn it, you can't ever leave!
You burst into your room, looking at the empty spot on your bed where you'd left your clothes before going in the bath.
"No." The maids, they must've put it in your closet. You searched it, searched your entire room but to no avail.
A maid walked into your room, watching you tear apart the bedroom. "P-princess? May I help-"
"Where are my clothes?!" You walked upto her, the poor maid's fright apparently on her face. "WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES!?"
"They- they're burning it-"
"WHERE?!"
"The gardens!"
You ran out of your room, and made your way towards the royal gardens as fast as you could, but with how huge this palace was, getting there took a while. Not to mention when you did get to the gardens, you didn't spot anyone there, but you did notice the smell of something burning, which lead you to the back of the gardens, that was away from everyone's sight.
There you found them, two maids burning your clothes in a small bonfire.
"PUT IT OUT!" You yelled as you rushed towards them, startling them.
"Princess-" they began bowing.
"Didn't you hear me? PUT THE FIRE OUT!" They scrambled about trying to find some water, but of course, they didn't have it.
"I'll get it from the fountain!" The two maids ran to get a bucket of water for you, but it would be too late by the time they came. So when you spotted your old dress burning, you pulled it out with bare hands, not caring about burning yourself.
The dress was mostly burnt to ashes, while only few bits remained that were still on fire. You managed to wrangle out your time machine out of it, the small metal box that was burning hot and left marks on your skin as you tried to hold it.
But even from here, you could see the damage was done. The area that displayed the year had now completely melted off, as did some of the buttons.
No. No. No. No. No. NO!
You couldn't help but cry as reality began to set in. You're stuck here.... you're stuck here forever.
Heart wrenching sobs wracked your body as you tried to hold the hot metal machine in your hands, your skin burning as you tried. Even when the servants came and poured the water on the fire, you still kept on crying, clutching your machine to your chest, partly to conceal it, partly from helplessness.
The maids looked at each in worry as they tried to console you, tried to pacify you, lest you had them executed. But it didn't matter, you were inconsolable. While one of the maids sat by your side, trying to soothe you, the other one ran in to get help.
Moments later, when you were able to hide the machine in your clothes again, someone came up and touched your shoulder from behind.
"Y/n?" You looked up through your tears. It was Baldwin. For some reason, seeing him only made you cry harder as you finally realised that you were stuck here with him. That you fucked up permanently.
"Oh princess. What's wrong? Don't cry- shhh, I'm here." He pulled your body towards him, letting you sob into his chest heartbreakingly. Exhaustion, frustration and shock must have overtook your body, as you fainted in his arms.
"Princess? Y/n?" He tried waking you up before collecting you in his arms and rushing back into the castle.
-
Hours later, you woke up to find yourself back in your room, lying in your bed. Your eyes looked down at your hands which were now wrapped in bandages. They only served as a reminder of what youd lost- your time machine.
Tears welled up in your eyes again. Am I- am I really stuck here? You sniffled.
A hand came up to caress your cheek, startling you.
It was Baldwin. "Princess? Do you want to tell me what happened?" His soft tone made you even more sad, and you raised your bandaged hands to wipe your tears, but he caught your wrists and lowered them back gently, using his own hands to wipe away the tears.
"No, you cant use your hands for sometime. The burns need to heal." His hand remained on your cheek, thumb caressing the area under your eye. "What happened, Y/n? Why were you so upset?"
You cant avoid the topic for long, and now that your way of escape is gone, you need to be careful of what you say and how you act around the king.
You let out a shaky breath. "They... they burned my clothes."
"Mmhm. Dont worry, I will have them bring in the fanciest clothes for you. Sibylla will make sure of it. Only the best for my princess." You shook your head. "Its not- its not that... They were my clothes... they burned away-"
"I know... but its a tradition. The maids burn away the bride-to-be's old clothes to signify that youre detaching yourself from the past and starting a new life." He explained, watching as you sniffled. Clearly, you were still upset over this.
"But the maids, they still should've informed you of this tradition before doing anything. I know how emotional of a transition this could be for girls." You nodded sadly, heart still sinking at the loss of your machine. "Dont worry though, they will be punished harshly for it. I have them in the dungeons tonight, and tomorrow-"
"What? Punished? No!" You cut him off. You dont want anyone to die because of you, especially when you dont know if anyone these people could potentially be an ancestor of yours.
"But they caused you harm. You burned yourself due to their-"
"No, no. Please, don't punish anyone- I- it was my fault for not knowing about royal traditions! Please, your Majesty, I beg you- don't do this- i- i-" You pleaded.
"Shhh, okay. Okay. I won't punish them for it." He patted your hair. "On one condition."
You looked at him in confusion.
"You call me Baldwin from now on." He grinned. "We are to be husband and wife soon, I don't want us to use royal titles with each other."
Your eyes widened. Is he- is he really giving up titles? You're not that blind to see his attempts at intimacy, but what you don't understand is why or even how you came to be on the receiving end of it.
What exactly is it about you that has made him want to marry you? Surely, Baldwin would've preferred to marry someone of this era, someone who is more compatible with him. Despite you trying to blend in the past months, you allowed Baldwin to see how you're not... as Conservative as most people of this time period are. One could say that he may be impressed by how intelligent you are than others, but it also brings up the factor of being "threatened" or "insulted" by the same intelligence.
Even though you consider beauty to be a "subjective" thing, the whole "beauty is in the eye of the beholder", you're not blind to how attractive others are. So why not them?
Did he only like you because you're intriguing? Does he still think you're a spy? Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer?
Probably. Or maybe he really does believe all that mumbo jumbo about you being "an angel sent to save him."
"As you wish... Baldwin."
-
Last night, after Baldwin had left you to rest, you stayed up and tried to figure out if you can fix your time machine, and if not, then can you built another one?
Fucking hell. You closed your eyes. I made it once, I can build it again. But it's easier said than done.
Back in the present, you had the technology to build it. Now? You have to first make the technology and the tools from scratch before you could even get on making your time machine, all while keeping your science project discrete, which was easier before because you weren't going to be married to a fucking King!
Right now, you're sitting in Baldwin's private dining room (yes, there are more than one dining room. He's royalty, what did you expect) having breakfast- well, being fed breakfast.
"You really don't need to do this." You said as Baldwin fed you another spoonful. He smiled as he wiped your lips with a napkin. "I don't need to, I want to. Besides, I don't want my princess starving."
Involuntary, your face flushed. "I- the maids could've fed me. And im not a princess." He frowned slightly. "Why would you- open wide, princess- why would you want the maids to feed you when you have me?" He pushed the spoon to your face as you parted your lips, but then he pulled it away and brought his face close to yours. "Do I make you nervous?"
You backed away immediately. "I- no- I mean-"
He burst out laughing. "I'm- I'm sorry princess, but you are just too endearing!" Baldwin chuckled as he grabbed the spoon again and fed you.
Your cheeks reddened, this time more out anger than embarrassment. "I don't want to eat anymore." You muttered, turning your face away.
He smiled as he brought the spoon to your lips again. "Ah ah, but you still haven't had enough." However, you rejected again, looking away instead of replying.
He sighed, placing the spoon back on the plate. "I'm sorry, princess. I shouldn't have laughed at you."
"You shouldn't have." You mumbled, face still turned away from him.
His lips quirked up a bit. "You know, for someone who insists that she's not a princess-" He turned your face to him gently. "- you sure have all the blandishment of one."
"Blandishment?"
"Flattering actions of a princess." He nodded.
You frowned. "Are you calling me a spoiled princess? A brat?"
"I would never!" Baldwin gasped. "I enjoy you acting like royalty, demanding respect and attention. You deserve it and more. Besides-" He picked up some food on the spoon again and brought it to your lips. "Even if if you were a spoiled, bratty princess, I wouldn't mind. I would enjoy spoiling you, hm?" He nudged the spoon to your lips softly.
You parted your lips, making him smile. It really is hard to stay mad at him when he looks at you with his baby blue eyes. They just- they draw you in.
"Also, before I forget, I will be leaving the castle today to meet Salauddin. So you can either hand out with Sibylla, who still wants to help you design your wedding gown, or your can-"
Salauddin? "Why are you meeting Salauddin? Isn't he your enemy?"
He chuckled. "Only on the battlefield. He and I have developed a friendship, or a mutual respect over the years. As to why I'm going to meet him, is... well, you."
"Me?" He nodded. "Since you told me that you're a Muslim, I thought that we could perhaps have a discreet Islamic wedding- what is it called? Nikkah? So, I could go and learn more about it from Salauddin."
You opened your mouth to protest. You don't need to be part of history as the "king of Jerusalem's Muslim wife" or "the Muslim-Christian wedding that took place during the Crusades", even if it might make the world more progressive.
But then, you didn't protest. "Can I come?"
Baldwin raised a brow at you. "You want to meet Salauddin?" You shook you're head. "Well, no, not really. I mean, I don't mind meeting him, but I just want to get out of the castle for a bit. It's been months since i left this place, I just want to get some fresh air." This could be the perfect opportunity for you, because if memory serves you right, Muslims of this era had made significant advances in science. Maybe you can use their help to get some tools to make the time machine again.
Baldwin looked unsure. "I don't know if it would be safe for you-" you held his hand with your bandaged ones. "Please, Baldwin? Can't you take me with you? And wouldn't I be the most safe when I'm with you?" Ah yes, stroke the male ego.
Finally, he smiled.
"Alright. I supposed it would be fine, after all, you should see the kingdom you're going to be the queen of."
Thoughts? (Also, I need to go shower rn, so I'll put the read more later. Doing so much effort for u guys, my spoiled greedy children)
Part 3 is here.
#yandere baldwin#yandere king baldwin#male yandere#yandere male#yandere x reader#yandere x#yandere x darling#yandere#baldwin iv
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
đŹđš đđŠđđ«đąđđđ§ â đŠđŻđ
summary: where max verstappen is the subject of a love song from a singer who never writes love songs pairing: max verstappen x american singer!reader faceclaim: no one specifically but based off olivia rodrigo
note: me? writing max verstappen? smau fluff? on main? everyone look away.
dailyynupdates
liked by user33, user4, user16 and others
dailyynupdates yn was seen around monte carlo the past few days, taking pictures with fans and allegedly cozying up with three time world champion max verstappen
view all 104,210 comments...
user12 what is going on in the house of commons because this was the last thing i expected
user39 this is quite literally the most random pairing i've ever stumbled across
user91 how do they even know each other đ user63 right like...where did this even come from? how did it start? literally how did they meet? they could not be farthest apart in the sphere of famous people
user19 now who the hell is max verstappen and why is he with my wife?
user49 oh girl you have a lot to catch up on the max lore user71 max is a formula one driver user56 saying max is a formula 1 driver like he currently isn't dominating the sport to the point where people hates him saying he's making it boring since he keeps winning because he's just that fucking good that literally no other driver can keep up is kinda wild user10 oh so our girl's new man is good at his job user52 "good at his job might just be the biggest understatement of the century when it comes to max. man's a fucking beast at his job
user48 i dont have to see her with her ratty ex anymore omfg war is over
user93 dare i say...they're adorable
user82 yn being in an age appropriate, healthy relationship? i never thought the day would come
user74 we won for real đ„čđ«¶
dailyynupdates
liked by user23, user31, user69 and others
dailyynupdates max and yn in a video posted by yn's friend đ
view all 59,129 comments...
user93 oh my god look at them đ
user81 they look so in love i want to cry
user65 "maximillian, do i look pretty like this?" "you always look pretty" i couldn't quite catch what he said at the end but đđđ
user85 dutch here and i believe he said "laiverd" which means darling user75 this means so much to me user65 you just made my entire week
user45 seeing her in love after all the shit men is healing a part of me i didnt know was broken
user53 max fixing her hood then kissing her cheek what if you just stabbed me
user31 every time i see these, i get the urge to take a shot of bleach đ
sincerelyyn â
liked by conangrey, maxverstappen1, taylorswift and others
sincerelyyn can't have a conversation if it's not all about you
view all 402,452 comments...
yourfriend as the other person of those conversations, he's fine i guess đ
sincerelyyn you know i love youuuuu
taylorswift love seeing you happy â€ïž
sincerelyyn â€ïžâ€ïž user73 mother is all of us user63 you know it's real when it's taylor swift approved
conangrey i hate happy couples i hope you both trip đ«¶
sincerelyyn die đ«¶
user92 their friendship is everything to me
user15 not girlie trying to soft launch like we all don't know who it is đ
user43 THEYRE SO âŒïžđ„”đ„°â ïž
user65 you're so right
user24 i'm so happy finally seeing our girl happy đ
user84 "someday i'll be everything to somebody else" YES YOU ARE BABYGIRL đ
maxverstappen1
liked by sincerelyyn, charles_leclerc, landonorris and others
maxverstappen1 my american girl đ©·
view all 308,291 comments...
charles_leclerc i still can't believe this is happening
maxverstappen1 for someone who don't even follow me, you sure are early to my posts đ user91 max gagged him with that im afraid
landonorris please please max talk to her about getting me tickets đ
user85 lando is just like us fr struggling to get guts tour tickets maxverstappen1 no â€ïž landonorris đ sincerelyyn @landonorris let me get you in contact with my team đ€ maxverstappen1 baby noooo sincerelyyn be nice, max landonorris HELL YEAH THANKS YN user42 this is the crossover i never thought i needed
user66 max posting non racing content and being all soft in the comments for yn in what world am i in
user52 fr i feel like im in an alternate universe đ
sincerelyyn love youuuu
maxverstappen1 love you more
sincelyyn i never knew love could be so golden till i met you <3
maxverstappen1 mijn hele hart is van jou, schat (you own my entire heart, darling) user42 they mean so very much to me đ
danielricciardo god the two of you make me nauseous
maxverstappen1 hating because you ain't us danielricciardo im not liking that attitude, kid đ user71 daniel is so us
sincerelyyn
liked by maxverstappen1, taylorswift, yourfriend and others
sincerelyyn so american will be out on all platforms at midnight. a letter to the man i love, the only way i know how â€ïž
view all 592,649 comments...
maxverstappen1 i adore you with everything in my being â€ïž
sincerelyyn ik hou van je (i love you)
i hope you guys liked this as much as i loved writing it đ«¶
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#f1 social media au#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen instagram au#max verstappen x you#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen#max verstappen fluff
1K notes
·
View notes
Note
Max' older brother who charles has had a crush on since they first met, where charles figures out that older brother has been holding back in raceing so their dad focuses on him so he doesnt hurt max, and charles is in awe because older brother could have made it into formula 1 a while ago and charles doesnt think hed be able to do something like that if it were him, so charles decides to help male reader as much as he can without being noticed.
I had someone else try and write this to see if theyd been as enthusiastic as you in writing it but no its like they didnt understand the ask @/playinbillie if you want to see what they wrote. Also this was kinda one of the two stories i had for you i didnt actually know the pairing i wanted for this one so i just made it charles, but the other is a oliver x kimi x male reader.
.
Unspoken sacrifice â Charles Leclerc x male!reader
Word countâ 1777
Fluff slightly angsty
The sound of the engines roaring around the track echoed through Charles' chest as he sat in the stands, his gaze fixed on the cars speeding past. But his attention wasnât on the race; it was on himâY/N.
Max's older brother. The one who couldâve been great.
For years, Charles had watched from the sidelines as Y/N, despite his obvious talent, kept himself from rising through the ranks of racing. Every time theyâd go karting, every practice session, Y/N would leave everyone in the dustâexcept for Max. The family dynamic was always clear. Their dad, a former racer himself, was invested in Max. Obsessed with Max.
But Y/N? He was always the silent presence in the background, holding back in ways that didnât make sense to Charles at first. There was something about Y/Nâs racing that seemed... off. Too controlled, too careful, like he was playing a different game entirely. Charles hadnât realized why until recently.
It was after one of the practice races, as he sat next to Y/N on the cool metal bleachers, watching Max celebrate his victory with their dad, that it clicked.
âY/N, why didnât you go for the win?â Charles had asked, his brow furrowing.
Y/N gave him that knowing smile, one that always seemed to hide more than it let on. âBecause he needs to be the one who shines. Max... heâs the one Dad focuses on. You know that.â
Charles stared at him, confused. âBut youâ you couldâve taken that first place. Youâve always been better than me, better than Max.â
Y/Nâs gaze shifted toward the ground, his voice quiet. âSometimes the best thing you can do is step back.â
Charles frowned, his mind racing. âBut why? Why hold back? You couldâve been in Formula 1 by now. Why give that up?â
Y/N was silent for a moment, the weight of the years theyâd spent together suddenly sinking in. âBecause, Charles, if I push too hard, Dad would want me to push Max harder, too. And Max isnât ready for that. Heâs not me. Iâd rather see him succeed than risk seeing him burn out.â
Charles was stunned. He hadnât realized how much Y/N had sacrificedânot just his dreams, but his entire futureâfor the sake of his younger brother. It wasnât just about racing. It was about family, about love, about keeping Max safe.
And it broke Charlesâ heart.
The thought of his older brother never having the chance to race for real, to chase that Formula 1 dream, made him feel a sharp ache in his chest.
"That's... that's really something, Y/N," Charles said quietly, feeling an overwhelming surge of admiration for the older brother he'd never truly understood before.
Y/N shrugged, a bittersweet smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. âItâs what family does, right? You put them first.â
But Charles wasnât sure if that was enough anymore.
Heâd never be able to do what Y/N had done. He would never have the strength to hold back when it mattered, to throw away his own potential for someone else. Y/N had given everything, and Charles had only just realized it.
And now, watching Y/N quietly fade into the background again, Charles made a decision.
âIâm going to help you, Y/N,â Charles said suddenly, surprising even himself. âI donât know how yet, but I will. I wonât let you fade into the background.â
Y/N looked over at him, a surprised yet knowing look crossing his face. âCharles, you donât need toââ
âI know,â Charles interrupted, his voice firm. âBut I want to.â
Y/N gave a small chuckle, ruffling Charles' hair. âYou donât have to do anything for me, kid. Youâve got your own career to focus on.â
Charles didnât reply, his mind already planning how he could work in the shadows, how he could help his brother rise again without anyone noticing. Without Max ever knowing.
He wouldnât let Y/Nâs sacrifices be in vain.
And maybe, just maybe, they could still achieve the dream Y/N had set aside for so long.
Over the next few weeks, Charles found himself subtly changing the way he approached his time with Y/N. Every practice session, every karting weekend, he was paying more attentionânot just to his own racing, but to his older brotherâs every move.
It wasnât hard to see how much Y/N was holding back. He wasnât just playing it safe; he was actively limiting his own performance, choosing more cautious lines, braking earlier, and settling for second or third place when he easily couldâve taken the win.
It frustrated Charles more than anything. Watching Y/N squandering his potential, doing exactly what heâd done his entire life: taking a step back for the sake of someone else.
And it made Charles feel helpless. He wanted to shout, to demand that Y/N race to his fullest, that he deserved more than the life of a background player. But he couldnât. He understood now why Y/N was doing it. Heâd made that sacrifice for Maxâand maybe even for their father. It wasnât just about being in the spotlight; it was about keeping the family dynamic intact.
But Charles wasnât going to let it go on forever.
One night, after a particularly difficult race where Y/N had barely edged out Max for a second-place finish, Charles made up his mind. He needed a plan. He needed to help Y/N, even if he had to do it in secret.
"Y/N," Charles said casually as they were cleaning up their gear, the two of them alone in the garage. Max was off with their dad, discussing strategies for his next race. "Have you ever thought about going to some of those off-season testing events? The ones where they bring in reserve drivers, or... younger talents?â
Y/N gave him a sideways glance, his expression unreadable. âIâve been to a few. A long time ago. But you know as well as I do, they wonât give me the time of day. Not with Max in the picture.â
âI think youâre wrong.â Charles smiled, trying to hide the excitement bubbling up in him. âWhat if I can get you into one of those events? Just a test run, no pressure. Iâll set it up.â
Y/N gave him a bemused look. âAnd how exactly are you going to pull that off? You donât have the connectionsâ"
Charles leaned in closer, his voice low but confident. "I do now."
For the next few weeks, Charles worked quietly behind the scenes, making calls and sending messages to everyone he knewâengineers, team managers, even his own contacts within the F1 world. It wasnât easy. Y/N wasnât exactly a household name, and most people were only interested in the young stars, not a 25-year-old with years of untapped potential. But Charles didnât care about the odds.
He couldnât let Y/Nâs talent slip away, not when he knew what his brother could truly do.
It was a month later when Charles finally received the response heâd been waiting forâa private testing session for a mid-tier team looking to give fresh talent a shot. It wasnât Formula 1, not yet, but it was a step in the right direction. A foot in the door.
He waited until the perfect moment, when Y/N wasnât expecting it, and told him about the opportunity.
âY/N, I got you a test with an F1 team. Youâre going to drive at their private session next week.â
Y/N blinked, looking at him as though Charles had just said something absurd. âWhat?â
âI did. Youâre driving for them next week.â
At first, Y/N didnât believe it. He laughed, like Charles was making a joke at his expense. But the more Charles pushed, the more he explained how hard heâd worked to arrange it, how heâd bent a few rules and called in a few favors, the more Y/Nâs expression shifted from confusion to disbelief to... gratitude.
But even then, Y/N hesitated. "Charles, you know Iâm notâ"
âYou are ready,â Charles cut him off, standing firm. âI know it. I know you couldâve made it into F1 years ago if youâd wanted to. I wonât let you give up on it.â
There was a long silence. Then, slowly, Y/N nodded, a quiet smile tugging at his lips. "Alright. But you better not tell Max about this. Heâll never forgive me if he finds out.â
Charles grinned. âDeal.â
The week of the test, Y/Nâs nerves were palpable, though he tried to hide them. As they stood by the track, Charles watched him suit up, a wave of pride crashing over him. His brother was about to show the world what he could really doâand no one would know who had pushed him there.
Charles knew it wasnât enough just to get Y/N the test. The hard part was making sure Y/N knew he had someone in his corner. Someone who believed in himânot as the background player or the second-best brother, but as the talented, driven racer heâd always been.
The test went better than Charles could have hoped. Y/N drove like he was born for it. Fast, fearless, and precise, he outpaced every expectation. By the end of the session, the teamâs engineers were already talking about bringing him back for more testing.
But Charles didnât want to get ahead of himself. This wasnât the finish line. This was just the beginning.
As they packed up to leave, Y/N clapped him on the shoulder, a grateful, somewhat overwhelmed look in his eyes.
âThanks, Charles,â he said quietly. âI donât know what to say... I didnât think Iâd ever get a shot like this.â
Charles smiled, the weight of the unspoken promise hanging between them. âYou donât have to say anything. Just keep driving. Iâll make sure you get there.â
The next few months passed in a blur. Y/Nâs performance in the test had caught the attention of several teams, and before long, he was back on the radar. Charles helped when he could, keeping things quiet and making sure that Y/Nâs success stayed under the radar. Max never knew what had really happened. And Y/N, though hesitant, slowly began to believe that maybeâjust maybeâhe could make it to Formula 1 after all.
But it wasnât just about racing anymore. It was about a bond between brothers, one that went beyond the track. A bond that said: Iâve got your back, no matter what.
#f1#f1 x reader#formula one x reader#formula one imagine#formula one x you#f1 x y/n#formula one x oc#formula one x y/n#faiths inboxesđ„đš#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x male reader
97 notes
·
View notes
Note
Would love my girl part 2 how rafe finds her and sees marks on her neck
MY GIRL (PT.2) || R. CAMERON
part 1 â my girl
summary; rafe was determined to kill anyone who ever hurt you but when you asked differently of him, he complied.
warnings; not proofread!!, marks on r's neck, mention of wanting to kill (?)
a/n; was hoping someone would ask for this, im so glad you guys enjoyed it!! <3
â masterlist
ending of part 1; as rafe got to his truck, he grabbed his gun out from under the driver seat and placed it in the back of his pants because he didnt know what to expect, or who but all he knew is that he would do absolutely anything to protect you from harm.
â
rafe hopped in his truck, put his key in and flew out of the parking lot and onto the road as fast as he could to get to you. he didnt care how many laws he broke or how fast he was going, you were the one thing that filled his mind and he couldn't think of anything else.
when rafe arrived to the chateau he immediately saw you, jumped out of his truck and ran to you as fast as he could. you were constantly talking to john b to keep him talking and make sure he was still with you from how bad he was beaten.
when you heard his footsteps you looked back to him as your tears fell from your lashline and down your cheek, creating a black streak from your mascara. "please h- help, topper, he -" you yelled to him, hyperventilating from your cries.
rafe came up beside you, standing over john b as you sat beside him trying to help in anyway you could. "fuuckk" rafe mumbled to himself just under his breath. examining what happened and seeing how badly hurt john b was, he crouched down next to you with a hand lining his mouth as he thinks about what to do next.
"help me carry emâ to the truck, aight?" he said softly, turning his head and looking at your pouty, sad face.. thats when he saw it; the marks on your neck. his face dropped, knowing that whoever was brave enough to do this to you knowing who you belonged to was a dead man in seconds and he demanded to know exactly who it was.
he brought his hand up to your neck, lining the area the marks laid on your neck with his fingers. "who the fuck do this to you?" he demanded harshly. no matter how hard you would try to defend whoever did this or hide their name from him, rafe would find out who every single time.
rafe couldn't bare to let someone who hurt you like this get away with it and he never did. when he asked you, you turned to him in fear, pouting. you gave him that sad look that told him everything he needed to know.
you saw rafe become tense when he realized who did it to you, "mâ gonna kill that mâfucker." he said with a raspy tone. as much as a dick topper could be, and how he treated you he deserved a lot of karma but there was no telling what rafe would do. "rafe, no." you said firm, "please just help me get john b outtaâ here, yeah?" you pleaded of him with puppy dog eyes he just couldn't resist.
rafe rolled his eyes because he knew he wasnt going to do anything since you asked of him and he of course, could never resist anything you asked of him. "yeah yeah, lets get emâ up." he responded softly, his voice trailing off as he reached down to help get john b up. you placed one of john b's arms around your shoulder and his other arm was placed around around rafes shoulder.
you both helped him walk to the truck, laying him down in the backseat. john b moaned from the pain as his nose and head bled out. rafe closed the back door and followed you to the passenger side, opening the door to let you in and closing it for you.
rafe enjoyed knowing that you were safe, he could keep eyes on you whenever (as if he doesn't already), and it gave him comfort but he already knew now that he may not do anything bad to topper like he had planned, he was definitely going to leave a message for him.
as rafe walked around the truck to the driver side and hopped in, you said to john b, "just hang on, âkay? we'll get you fixed up". rafe got out of there as fast as he could, once again, speeding and breaking laws but he didnt care because it was all for you which made it worth it.
rafe grabbed your hand in his and turned to admire your pretty face, "when we get home we'll take care of that neck, yeah?" he said to you with a smile as he swapped his vision back and forth between the road and you. you nodded to him, it made you so happy knowing that rafe loved caring for you like this.
#4rafe#rafe cameron#rafe outer banks#rafe obx#outerbanks rafe#rafe x you#rafe fanfiction#rafe smut#rafe x reader#rafe imagine#drew starkey#drew starkey imagine#drew starkey x reader#obx#obx fanfiction#outer banks#rafe cameron prompt#john b routledge#rafe fic#rafe cameron headcanons#obx imagine#obx x reader#obx fic#anon ask#anon request
167 notes
·
View notes
Note
I just used all my saved primogems on wanderer's banner and he still didnt come home đ
Can I request a small sagau fic about him for comfort
rest
word count: ~1k
-> warnings: dialogue heavy reader, no spoilers though
-> gn reader (you/yours)
taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie || @boba-is-a-soup || @yuus3n || @esthelily || @turningfrogsgay || @cupandtea24 || @genshin-impacts-me || @chaoticfivesworld || @raaawwwr
< masterlist >
your door was creaky. another thing to fix.
âwhy are you awake?â
but at least your wanderer was back.
you sit up from where youâre laying on the couch, taking a breath to clear your expression before turning to watch him come in. he shuts the door quietly despite the permanently sour look on his face, taking off his hat.
âwelcome back. how was school?â
he made a face and you laughed, waving him over to join you. though he did walk closer, he merely crossed his arms and stood at the end of the couch. still, his voice wasnât nearly as harsh as it could have been, âwhy do you insist on saying it like that?â
âthe akademiya is a school, right?â
he stares, and you smile. itâs clear he doesnât have an argument.
âiâm a professor.â
âyouâre still going to school.â
âwhy are you upset?â
your smile slips. were you that transparent? ânothing for you to worry about. uh, you said you would be collecting draft essays today, right? howâd that go?â
his face shifts, softening just slightly around the edges. his hands fall, one propping on his side instead. âdonât change the subject.â
you could make a joke, but youâre too tired to try. the brief banter had given you some energy, but nowâŠ
you sigh, looking down to the discarded papers on the coffee table. letters, mostly, but a few diagrams you were supposed to look over. plans for a festival, a new shrine (how many did teyvat need?), the nth invitation to a lunch or event or whatever was going on that hour. you were honestly getting a headache before he showed up, and that wasnât even addressing the other issues not on paper. âeven gods canât escape paperwork.â
he pulls all the papersâthereâs a few not even taken from their envelopes yet, how did that happenâinto a pile near the edge of the table, then sits beside you. he picks up a paper and skims it, then puts it to the side. âwhy are you handling this? shouldnât someone else?â
you lean on his shoulder, watching as he begins to sort all the papers into two piles. you canât pick out whatever pattern heâs using: some he lingers on for a few seconds, some he tosses in an instant. âthey were addressed to me.â
âso? you donât have to personally respond to every piece of fanmail.â he tosses one envelope into the second, larger pile with more force than the others. âitâs ridiculous. you should know better than to try and do all of this yourself.â
heâs probably right. as prickly as he can be, nine out of ten he at least had a good idea on how to approach an issue. heâd even clocked that you were stressed despite the fact that there was no was he could have seen your expression from the door.. though that may have something to do with your inability to hide your exhaustion when you turned.
âthere.â he sets a final paper in the first, much smaller pile, then taps it into a neater stack. âthis are the things that actually require your attention. donât waste your time with things that donât matter.â
âwhat about the other pile?â
âthey donât matter.â
âthatâs rude.â
âitâs true. i can tell youâre tired already-â damn, you didnât want to worry him â-and i can guarantee most problems people have faced you with are better handled by others.â
âdearâŠâ
âiâm serious.â he picks up the larger second pile, arranging them into a neater stack. âwhat do you have to do? name them.â
âtheres a merchant in liyue-â
âthat can be handled by the ministry of civil affairs.â he sets the pile down, leaning back. âwhat else?â
âan outbreak in mondstat-â
âknights of favoniusâ problem.â
âa few rogues in sumeru have been defacing my statues.â
he paused, and you adjusted your position, leaning your back against him instead. he lifted his arm and put it across your chest, and when he spoke it was much softer. âstill better handled by the mahamatra. if you arenât directly involved, thereâs no need to worry about them.â
âbut theyâre asking for helpâŠâ
âtheyâre asking the wrong person. trust me, youâre above them and their petty squabbles. in fact.. you should take a nap.â
âwhat?â
he moved toward the end of the couch, laying your head in his lap. âtake a nap. or just lie down, i donât care. relax for a bit. these people have given you too much stress already, itâs better if you didnât waste any more energy on them.â
he was looking away, still obviously trying to keep up the image of indifference, but you could still spot the cracks. his hand still stayed on your shoulder, tracing random shapes across your shirt, and he didnât say anything snarky when you put your own hand over his.
he cared for you, just as you cared for him. he cared enough that heâd remind you not to worry about unnecessary things, that heâd physically put himself between you and whatever problem the world demanded you face, even though on the surface it wouldnât seem like he viewed you with anything less than distaste.
well, to others it was a conundrum. to you it was pretty clear, as who else would he sit with like this? he regularly ranted on about those who attended his lectures, still dismissed the words of mahamatra, still ignored most other authorities save for possibly nahida. but for you, heâd sort through your paperwork and have you sleep where he could ensure you did⊠he was sweet like that.
you smiled. âyouâre adorable.â
âi am not.â
#sagau#genshin#genshin impact#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#sagau wanderer#wanderer genshin#wanderer x reader#wanderer x you#wanderer headcanons#scaramouche genshin impact#scaramouche genshin x reader#say âgenshinâ like his last name lmao#sagau x reader#genshin x you#sagau x you#genshin x reader#genshin impact x you#genshin impact x reader#wanderer fluff#fluff#sagau fluff#genshin fluff#wanderer my darling#hi hello i have Not been writing#i have been painting plastic children and Doing Other Petty Crimes#i KNEW i was forgetting something when i posted ugh
431 notes
·
View notes
Text
Does anyone else think about how Shinji said this twice...
The first time was somewhat innocent, because he didnt believe in the idea of fate. He refused the idea outright because it was just too bleak. He wanted to think that there was a way for everyone to live, so why believe in something like destiny or predetermination?
And yet... He likely said this out loud to comfort Tezuka, to motivate him, to keep him from giving into despair. Shinji does not believe in fate, but the person he is dragging out of the battle field does, and he wants Tezuka to borrow his own feelings of determination and passion for just a moment, so they can both live to see the next day.
But what Shinji doesnt understand is that Tezuka did this sacrifice precisely because of Shinji's passion. Shinji has nothing to offer to this man because Tezuka has already made the choice to purposely refuse the benefits of Shinji's savior complex. He make his choice the moment that he walked out the door of Atori, and purposely distanced himself so Shinji wouldn't try to die for someone else. Tezuka explains that he changed fate for Shinji to live. Tezuka explains that he took this man's place so that Shinji can fight in this war, so that Shinji can find an end to the violence. Tezuka wants him to continue where he would fail, where he would have blamed himself for the death of another friend and never gotten back up.
Shinji wishes there was another option, that he could have somehow seen this coming and stopped Tezuka and figured out a way to live too... But what can he really do? Tezuka's last words left such an impact on him, and while Shinji originally didn't believe in fate, he could not help but lean into the idea after Tezuka's death. He tends to weigh other people's ideas more than his own in his head, so when Tezuka dies because he followed his principles to the end like this... He just can't deny it as much as before. Denying that fate exists would be spitting on the face of his friend's choice, right?
So the idea sits with him. The idea that fate was already changed... He's not sure if he can believe it, but he can't not believe it, either. There had to have been another way that things have gone, right? That's what he wants to think, but he cannot deny the weight of Tezuka's ultimate choice. He has to learn to accept this, somehow, but it's hard for him, it's hard to remember which thoughts are his own and which thoughts are borrowed from his memories of Tezuka. Shinji slowly becomes burdened by the idea of fate. Believing in Tezuka's last hope is the only way for him to continue, it's the only way for him to cope.
And that's when the narrative throws a fucking curveball. This character, wrattled with grief, finally trying to move on from that horrible moment of senseless violence, is forcibly dragged backwards. Six months. Six entire months happening all over again right before his eyes. Shinji gets an impossible second chance to fix what never should have happened. He knows who is going to die and he has the time to prevent it. He can change it.
But he discovers that he cannot change himself. He watches everything in horror as it happens all over again because he cannot break out of his own skin. He can't change his habits, he can't think different thoughts or change his actions, he can't seem to remember the details of that future that has not happened yet. His future self, and his future grief, is buried deep inside of him. He tries to claw his way out in any way he can, but he is trapped in the prison that is himself. He can only catch the smallest glimpses of clarity through the bars of his cell, and by then it is often too late.
When Shinji finally gets back here, to this moment, he must have repeated these words. He cannot change his thoughts, after all. So he says it and it means the same thing as before; he wants to comfort Tezuka and lend him his own determination and will to live. But there is now an additional meaning to it, isn't there? There is now a layer of despair. A part of Shinji is so, so desperate for things to change. A part of him knows that Tezuka diverted fate for his sake, and isn't that diversion a part of fate now too? Can't we change that too? Do not die when fate tells you to die. Don't do this, don't leave me again.
#i wrote this in some tags a while back but im crazy and needed to elaborate and make my own post so hi whats up im normal about tv#anis gaymer moments#kamen rider#kamen rider ryuki#kamen rider ryuki spoilers#ryuki spoilers#tezushin#long post#<- SORRY JUS TREALIZED HOW LONG THE WALL OF TEXT IS
77 notes
·
View notes
Text
I love Neil so much because his whole thing is that hes a liar that lies about everything and has spent 8 years running for his life, trusting only one person, nobody else is trustworthy - he comes to palmetto trying not to make connections, making it easy to run, dont trust people, dont care about people
but then he's so clearly autistic in a way that makes him believe literally everything andrew says without any thought.
'oh well of course andrew doesnt like me, he said so. he said he hates me. so of course he doesnt, and would never, like me in any way. how would that be possible? he explicitly said he doesnt like me.'
to the point where hes like, days away from his impending doom and has been all but officially dating andrew for a while and he's still sincerely thinking 'well at least andrew is only hate fucking me and doesnt care about me as a person because thatd be sad when i die but he doesnt and could never care about me'
and andrew has been sitting there for three books, growing more and more obsessed with him; doing everything he asks, connecting with him in every way, telling him things hes never told his family, letting him in to help and fix things even though that makes him vunerable, silently panicking that neil is feeling more and more like something he Needs to have, something that he Cannot lose. He chooses Neil over Aaron. He'd choose Neil over Kevin. He'd give up everything for Neil who 100% believed that Andrew hated him entirely and wanting nothing to do with him, that he wasnt special for getting through to Andrew, that even though Andrew was kissing him he 100% believed that Andrew didnt care because thats what Andrew said
Neil Josten, the liar, who cannot fathom that someone might be lying to him
118 notes
·
View notes
Text
HOUSE MD SPOILERS below the cut
I just LOVE the ending. I hate it, but I love it and I want to talk about why it was actually so fucking good.
Tbh I love that Wilson, not House, is the one diagnosed with cancer.
Like it would have been so easy to end on the tempting note of House's actions having consequences and his drug use wrecking his body to the point of precancerous conditions that manfiest into the death he craved and nearly saw several times in the series, but they didn't. They could have given the character who is too disabled to exercise and has a diet of drugs and alcohol the cancer, but they didnt.
They said, no, the one who eats well and exercises regularly gets cancer. The one who blow dries his hair every morning and never does drugs(except the times he was roofied by House) and takes care of himself is diagnosed with terminal cancer and there is nothing to be done.
Because that's how cancer is. You can be in the best physical and mental shape of anyone and still lose to cancer, and fast. Sometimes the guy who eats nothing but fast food and has never checked his bmi will be the one whose organs last longer than his friend who eats balanced meals everyday and never done a thing to harm his body. Because that's how cancer is.
Cancer doesn't spare you because you're supposed to be the Watson to his Sherlock. Cancer doesn't spare you because you're an oncologist. Cancer doesn't spare you because your friend is the one who does drug and youre clean. Cancer doesnt spare you because all your meals were homecooked and made with your body's health in mind.
In this story, Sherlock fakes his death so Watson won't have to die alone. Because even the best detective is rendered useless in the face of his best friend's cancer.
I love that the story stuck to its guns and shot Wilson in the dead center of his clavicle.
Because "Cancer is Boring".
For a show that never stops trying to one up itself every episode to come up with the most insane medical conditions, ending it with the patient being Wilson, and the prognosis being simple, boring cancer was the best choice I think they could have made even if I hated it.
Because I wanted Wilson to live, I wanted House to turn around and find some crazy thing that would mean he is okay and it never happened. Wilson was just going to die, because it's cancer.
Simple and boring, but heavy and painful. I wanted Wilson to live, just like everyone who has lost a loved one to cancer wanted them to live, for a doctor to find something else and make it all better, but that's not what cancer is.
And for it to end on that note, really solidified this show in my brain as one to be remembered. Because, despite everything in the series, all the metaphors to geniuses and God and brilliance and remarkable feats, this show is true to itself to ALWAYS cut House down to a broken man again.
He gets his old flame back, and he still loves her, but it won't take long for that to end bitterly.
He does experimental medication, it fixes his pain and he can do the thing he loves again(running/jogging) and he ends up broken in his bathtub pulling tumors from his leg and ultimately has to call someone to help him.
He gets goes to rehab, gets clean, and wins the love of the main female lead, but he falls off, he gets suicidal, he loses her, and then he goes to jail.
He helps people while in jail, then he gets out of jail, he fixes his relationship with his best friend, he helps people at his old job, his best and only friend is diagnosed with terminal cancer, he lands himself in a burning building while tripping hard and takes that chance to throw everything away for this friend who will only be with him a few more months.
At the beginning, middle, and end of the show it really says "God doesn't limp."
Dr. Gregory House is just a man.
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ok so first off I'm just going to say that i know next to nothing about the fancasted Slytherin boys but i have been unable to get Mattheo Riddle out of my head for the last few day so here we are now
Mattheo Riddle x Hufflepuff!reader Warnings: Use of Y/n, cussing, possible bad writing.( lmk if there's any others i should add)
The summer before your sixth year at Hogwarts was spent bettering yourself in all the ways you thought were flawed. You were tired of being the odd one out in your circle of friends. You wanted the love that they had. None of them understood when you told them you wanted the fights they got into, they'd tell you you're romanticizing it too much and that it wasnt all love and roses, but you understood that, you wanted the dark parts as well as the light parts - you wanted to learn how to fix a fight. You wanted everything, but no one else seemed to want it - actually, thats not true they wanted stuff like that just not with you. With you they wanted to use your body then get rid of you by morning. You didnt like it it but you'd decided long ago that maybe its all you deserve, all you'll ever receive from anyone. Until HE was partnered with you on a project in potions class. All was well in your little fake world until HE started flirting with you anytime you'd work on the project together.
Everything was fine until one day he got a dare from Draco. "hey mate, noticed you've been hanging around with that one hufflepuff" Draco smirks at his friend whilst sitting down at a table the others had set up for studying in the library. "care to tell rest of the class if she's really as good as everyone makes her sound?" As Draco spoke Mattheo could feel his jaw tense. "And what the hell are you on about now Malfoy?" "Oh you know just the fact that your crushing on a whore." Draco leans back folding his arms across his chest before Mattheo kicks the chair out from underneath him. "And how many girls have you used for the same thing Draco? You have no right to speak about someone when your the exact same." Mattheo raised his voice looking down his nose at the blond boy. "Oh don't believe me? Give her a month, hell she'll probably be trying to jump you after a week of being just plain nice." Draco moves to his feet while speaking. Mattheo continuing to look down upon Draco says a quiet and simple "fine." before pushing the bleach blond twat back to his seat and reclaiming his to go back to studying.
Over the week following that night Mattheo let his affections pour down on you, he'd gotten to know you and he let you see parts of his soul that no one else had been able to. After the month was up and you hadnt done anything about your feelings for him and Draco realized he was wrong he started spreading the knowledge of the dare to anyone he spoke to. Gossip wasn't much of a big thing at Hogwarts so when there was big news it tended to spread like wildfire, but often got skewed along grapevine.
You had been sitting in the library with Hermione studying for a test when you'd noticed she looked as if she'd had something she'd wanted to say. So when finally you'd grown restless of her bouncing knee you ask her the question you've been dying to know the answer too. "Merlins beard, Hermione what is it." She looked up at you with a look on her face as if she had no idea what you were talking about. "Hermione?" You said her name in a questioning tone and she looked as if she caved within her mind. "Well, Draco's been talking, about the many people you've been with - and i am in NO way shaming you for anything - but he's been saying that there was a bet, with Mattheo that involved you, and supposedly he bet Mattheo that you'd go along with anything if he had y'know with you, and that that's why you've been hanging around him so much." The red haired girl spoke cautiously as if expecting you to break down right in front of her. You opened your mouth to say something, the one person you didnt want to see walked in. You had completely forgotten about agreeing to tutor him. You looked at him, no longer with a look of happiness approaching your face but instead a look of animosity grew and without a word you stood and collected your books walking past Hermoine and Mattheo going to your dorm room to collect your thoughts.
Mattheo gave the Granger girl and questioning and concerned look to which she responded with a pointed one and told him to go find Draco before turning back to her studies. So he did, he went to the grand hall to see if he was eating lunch, he went to the quidditch field to see if the blond was gallivanting on his broom. And lastly - which honestly it should have been first - he checks the Slytherin common room and it's inevitably where he finds the blond lounging on a sofa. Mattheo bounds toward Malfoy and picks him up by the lapels of his uniform jacket and shoves him to the nearest wall. Matttheo on his search for Draco had heard the rumours that were going around and each one making him angrier and angrier. He wants to yell at the boy against the wall but he doesnt want prying ears hearing. "What have you done Malfoy?" His words dripping with acidity and the blonds name punctuated with a rough shove against the wall. "I know nothing of what you mean Riddle." Another rough shove to the wall and Mattheo asks the question again. "What. Have you. Done. Malfoy."
"Nothing, I was merely speaking with Nott in a not so private corridor about that bet we had. It is not my fault that people overheard." That sentence earned him another shove. "You'll take it back." Mattheo was trying desperately to know some sense into the otherwise senseless boy of what he'd just done without saying it outright but never the less Draco still figured it out. "You aren't in love with her are you Riddle?" Draco spoke seemingly disgusted at the fact. "You. Take. It. Back." Becoming more and more in pain, and the look on Mattheos face reminding him of a certain someone who can't be named, Draco finally surrendered, agreeing to take back what he'd said. Mattheo let go but kneeing him in the stomach before he left to make his point known. He then made his way to the Hufflepuff dorms to find you, and explain himself, and maybe grovel/beg for forgiveness.
When he gets to the to for the dorms he knocks, he has a friend in Hufflepuff that has been waiting for him. They let him in and tell him discreetly where your dorm is. He makes his way through the halls and up the stairs until he's standing in front of your door. Before he knocks he's wracking his brain trying to figure out what to say but all thoughts he had went running away when he heard your soft sobs through the door. No doubt because of him.
Instead of knocking he opens the door quietly (thank goodness it wasn't locked) and made his way inside, he closed the door behind. You looked up at the noise of the door closing and made brief eye contact with Mattheo before looking away again. "why are you here? I know about your bet so you can just forget about everything." Your words bitter as you snapped at him. "Love⊠there was no bet of the type that you have undoubtedly heard. Draco - called you something i don't intend on repeating to you, and I want- no- needed to prove him wrong. i am so desperately sorry for any pain he i have made you." Mattheo walks up your now standing form and kneels in front of you resting his hands on your hips. "I- I can't do this, I let you in. I- I broke MY rules for you - FOR you. Because I- I loved you." He shoots up to his feet and rests his palms on your cheeks. "Don't- don't use past tenses we can still have this, we can still do this it doesn't have to end just because of some pitiful joke i made in a fit of rage. Please, one more chance and if i fail you again i leave you alone forever, I- I promise." the look in his eyes told you he was sincere yet you still doubted it. The one person you'd let fully inside to see the darkest parts hurt you, but it was something small, and Draco has that effect on everybody. You pull his face to yours connecting your lips together, his hands move from your cheeks to the small of your back to pull you closer. When you pull away breathing uneven. "Is that a 'we can be together' type of kiss." He smiled wide when he finishes speaking. "oh shut up." You pull him in for another kiss.
#mattheo riddle#mattheoxreader#mattheo x you#mattheo x y/n#slytherin boys#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle x you#mattheo riddle imagine#mattheo riddle fluff
94 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hihi! I loved ur first fic w/ natsume and jun! If u don't mind could u write abt Eichi, Keito and Nazuna having a crush on reader but the reader is super oblivious </3 and thinks they're just supperr close and calls them "nii-chan"
thank you anon! i didnt know much about these characters so this was a fun challenge <3 (everyone say thank you cherry, reze and qian for helping liddle olâ me with characterisation!) also oblivious reader is so silly /pos
eichi, keito & nazuna crushing on an oblivious reader
they/them pronouns used for reader in keito's part; no pronouns in other parts
eichi would be confused at first, but it eventually makes way for amusement!
heâs a busy man, but he makes sure to make time for you. youâre incredibly important to him⊠even if youâre not aware of just how much. Â
at first he thinks heâs doing something wrong â much of his knowledge on courting and romance comes from movies and books, so heâs unsure as to whether such things are okay in real life.
he invites you to tea⊠or to a fancy dinner⊠he buys you whatever you even glance at⊠and all heâs met with is a sweet smile and a bright âthank you, nii-chan!â
ah⊠heâs not very sure on how to proceed. cue the signature eichi faint smile ^_^
heâs not very creative in this department, so iâd expect him to start consuming more romance media to gain inspiration⊠he's hitting the books yall look at him go!!
due to this, a lot of his courting methods are traditional and cliche, but itâs incredibly endearing that he tries so hard! or it would be, if you were aware that he was courting you in the first placeâŠ
iâd think eichi is quite the clingy person â he hasnât had many friends or acquaintances, so to find someone he likes so much? someone who (probably. arguably. possibly.) likes him back just as much? heâs going to be so protective of you.Â
itâs very obvious how much he favours you! at least to everyone else -.- heâd have a special seat in his office just for you⊠your favourite tea blends (or other drinks, if you donât like tea!) just within reachâŠÂ
itâs visible in the way his voice softens almost imperceptibly when heâs speaking to you, or the way a smile slips onto his face when your name pops up in conversation.
though he thinks your oblivion is amusing â arenât you just the cutest, most innocent thing? â heâs well aware of his clock ticking down. he wonât admit it, but heâs quite afraid that he wonât be able to spend as much time with you as he wants to. heâll have to speed things up⊠maybe heâd just have to ask you directly? youâre sure to say yes, right?Â
keito & nazuna below the cut!
ah, keito. heâd be losing his mind actually.
this man is absolutely an overthinker. his huge wrinkly brain is working overtime for sure.
itâs silly because both of you would be oblivious at first! meaning, keito wouldnât notice his little crush until someone else points it out to him.
even then, heâd be firmly in denial⊠such feelings are utterly foreign to him. plus, he has no idea what to do with them!?
confess, keito. shoot your shot, thatâs what. â real words from his lecture club
heâs not likely to confess to you unless he knows for sure that you like him back. he likes having a solid plan to follow, and feels much more at ease when he can anticipate every outcome.
but youâre not gonna make it that easy for him, are you?
he really does try his best⊠but he has unconventional ways of showing his affection
he nags at you quite a bit! i hope you like his lectures 0(-( he just wants you to be at your best i promise.
romantic words arenât really his forte. this man is incredibly awkward when it comes to you, so any attempts to rizz you up end in him getting embarrassed and fleeing the scene.
100% he comes up to fix your collar or your tie and heâs so flustered from the proximity but youâre just like :DD nii-chan!!! and thereâs a pang in his chest.
"i smiled at them more than normal why dont they get it" "keito you looked constipated" /hj
heâd probably write manga about you⊠or create a character thatâs clearly inspired by you⊠please, please take the hint ;-;
heâd be crazy frustrated!! heâs not getting through to you at all and itâs driving him insane. this is solidly outside his comfort zone too, heâs not exactly having a fun time. he thinks heâs doing something wrong, or that this is your way of telling him youâre not interested⊠poor keito :(
someone close to him would have to coax him into telling you directly!! even then, it would take him a fair amount of time to psych himself up enough to act.
when it happens, though, he'd be a blushing, stuttering mess -- such a far cry from his usual calm demeanour.
nazuna is a sweetheart tbh...
he's already an affectionate and caring person, but it's turned up tenfold with you! it's pretty obvious when he has taken a liking to someone.
nazuna strikes me as someone who has to have a solid friendship before they can develop a crush, so the two of you probably already have a good relationship!
he dotes on you a ton, and checks up on you the same way he does his unitmates! he just wants you all to do your best, and he's unconditionally proud of you regardless of the outcome. he makes sure you know it too.
sure, he likes being called nii-chan by his juniors, but theres a certain pang in his chest when it's coming from you, especially when you sound so sincere about it.
ah... maybe he's taken on a brotherly role from your perspective... how would he go about expressing his interest in you instead? he's extremely respectful about it. nazuna drinks his respect people juice daily ^_^)b
he doesn't really know a way other than showering you with even more affection. loving you comes so easily to him! how could it not? you're so incredibly precious, he just wants to see you happy :)
poor guy gets overwhelmed easily, though... the combination of your sweet smile and your oblivious reactions to his advances makes his head swim!! if he's not careful? if he gets worked up enough and acts rashly? he might just go in for the kiss straightaway...
tags: @tokusaatsus, @kalimism
#⧠jes writes#eichi tenshouin x reader#keito hasumi x reader#nazuna nito x reader#eichi x reader#keito x reader#nazuna x reader#enstars x reader#eichi tenshouin#keito hasumi#nazuna nito#enstars
233 notes
·
View notes
Text
Time Traveller AU part 9
Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here. Part 4 is here. Part 5 is here. Part 6 is here. Part 7 is here. Part 8 is here. Time Traveller au masterlist is here. Check out my MASTERLIST for more!
Part 10 is here.
"I think you should take off your veil now. You need to impress the princes so that one of them could take pity and marry you. Or you could try black magic-"
"Baris, I will pull your tongue out and strangle you with it if you say another word." You muttered, holding your head in your hands.
After Baris landed the "marriage bomb" on you last night, you've been stressed. Why did I have to teach Mihirmah? Why did I have to accept the bracelet? Why did I-
"You have bags under your eyes, and considering that they're the only feature visible, its not good-" You threw a pillow at him, which he dodged easily. You hadnt slept at all, how could you? You tried to figure out a plan, that didnt work. You tried to fix your time machine, that was not going to work at all without tools.
"You could be wrong." You mumbled, opening your eyes as you stared ahead. "This bracelet could be nothing but just a kind gesture. It is not a marriage proposal. You're wrong-"
Baris cut you off. "I know it seems impossible, considering how you look, even I'm surprised- but I'm never wrong, Y/n. I've worked here for more 25 years, I know what everyone thinks." You stared at him with a pinched expression.
"You have to help me, Baris."
He smiled. "Of course, you'd be lost cause else wise! I'll get the seamstress to make you some new clothes-"
"No, I meant- you have to help me escape. I cant- I dont want to get married!"
He scoffed. "Darling, we're alone right now. You can drop the "I dont wanna marry a prince and enjoy the luxuries of the world" act."
"I mean it!" You huff.
"And why is that?"
"Because-" you bit your lip. What excuse can you possibly come up with to satisfy him?
"I love someone else."
"How tragic." He said monotonously. "Love has no place in the harem. You're here to attract, serve and please the royal family." He walked closer to you, leaning down as he lowered his volume. "And I'm going to give you some advice: you better not use that excuse again, never even MUMBLE about having a lover again, not unless you want to be tortured and executed for being a traitor."
You knew what he was referring to. The harem, the concubines, the whole palace was filled with jealousy. If anyone were to hear about this, they would use it against you, conjure up such vulgar lies that the sultan will chop off your head.
"Baris I cant-"
"You dont have a choice, Y/n." He cut you off harshly. "I suggest you suck it up and pretend to be happy or else you'll be in for a hard life."
"Now, get ready. You need to teach a lesson."
-
"You look sick."
You resist rolling your eyes. "Yes, I know I'm ugly. Thank you for keeping me updated."
Mihirmah shook her head. "No, I mean you dont look well. Are you alright?"
No, I lost sleep because of you and-
"Just tired, Mihirmah. I think we've should stop here today." You watched her beam.
"Finally! Now we can celebrate!" Mihirmah clapped her hands as the servants brought in some tea and sweets. She had initially wanted to celebrate her victory from last night as soon as you came in, but you wanted to get the lesson done with so that you could leave.
"You enjoy it. You did a good job." You tried to excuse herself but she frowned.
"I did. And so did you! I mean, the way you made Mahidevran shut up! It was amazing!" She took a piece of sweet and handed it to you. "Besides, my father appreciated your efforts as well-"
You looked down at the bracelet. This was more of a death sentence than a gift.
"Mihirmah." You took off your bracelet. "I- I appreciate the sultan's gift, but I cant accept this. Its too much- its-" you mentally rolled your eyes at your next excuse. "Its above me."
She furrowed her brows. "Even if that may be the case, which its not because you fully deserve that after the showdown, you still cannot refuse or return a sultan's gift, much less one that he made himself!" She tilted her head. "What is really going on? Why do you not want the bracelet? And dont say its not to your taste, because lets face it- you probably have not seen jewels like this in your life."
Biting the inside of your cheek to prevent the insults from slipping out, you took a breath.
"I... heard that..." you took another breath. How do you say "I dont want the bracelet because I dont wanna marry any of your brothers" without sounding narcissistic. "I... I heard that there might be a different meaning behind the bracelet. That it may signify... something else."
"Which is...?" She prompted you.
You exhaled.
"That I might be considered to be... a spouse for a sehzade."
Mihirmah snorted as you looked down to conceal both your embarrassment and fear.
"I'm sorry- what did you say?" She was laughing now. You continued to look down. As long as she's laughing and not getting mad at you for even suggesting such a thing, you're fine. Besides, if she's laughing then it means that all that bullshit Baris was spewing earlier was just that- bullshit.
"You think- my father, the sultan, wants you- YOU, to marry one of his sons?" She wiped a tear away from her eye as she laughed. "That is the most ridiculous idea I've ever heard. True, father does only give handmade gifts to those he considers close, but I dont think thats true in your case, Y/n. You're just my teacher, that's all. Besides, even if you were to be considered as a potential spouse for my brothers, you have my mother and Mahivdevran standing in your way. And trust me, they're going to marry their sons to someone they like. You- they cant even tolerate you as my teacher at this point of time."
Sighing in relief, you nod. "Well, that's great to hear-"
"Wait." Mihirmah narrows her eyes at you. "If you thought that my father wanted to marry you to one of his sons, why did you want to return the bracelet? Did you- did you not want to marry my brother?"
Oh shit. "Mihirmah no-" You tried to pacify her.
But she snapped at you. "What? You think you're better than my brothers? Any of them? You'd be lucky if Mehmed or Mustafa chose you, if such a miracle does happen."
Your eyes were wide at her venomous tone. You dont know whether it was because she was protective of her brothers, or if she just really hated the idea that you would consider rejecting royalty.
A few more moments of silence went by. "You misunderstand me, sultana." You chose her title to please her. "I know of my status, and I am well aware of how... lowly I am to be a part of this family. The only reason I was returning the bracelet was because... I didnt want the harem to assume things and threaten or hurt me. I am aware that the sehzade have their favourite concubines, much better equipped to their tastes. But if they were to see this bracelet gifted by the sultan on me, they would... it would cause misunderstandings. I just wanted to avoid that."
Your words were carefully selected to not aggravate her any further, which it didnt but they also didnt calm her down.
Mihirmah's face was still sour. "The concubines are smart enough to figure out who's a competition and who's just a mere servant. You have nothing to worry about."
The words stung but... you just bowed and took your leave instead of slapping her across the face.
Mehmed had just turned the corner when he saw you leaving Mihirmah's room with tears pooling in your eyes, the niqaab only causing them to look more prominent.
He entered Mihirmah's room, finding his sister looking angry as she gazed into space.
"Mihirmah?" He sat down beside her, noticing how she didnt immediately light up as she always did when he came. What did you do to piss her off so much?
He cupped her face to look at him. "What's wrong? Tell me."
-
You're laying in your bed, arm over your eyes as you try to think of a way out of here.
When will the time machine work again?
Its not like you can go out of the palace to get help or even tools to work on it, and you always fear that someone just may walk in on you tinkering with the machine. The only place where you can get privacy in this palace here is the dungeons, only because its dark and oh-so-daunting that it doesnt really attract people there.
There's a knock on your door. With a grunt, you get up and open the door, only to find no one there. Your room was in the harem, but it was on the upper floor, so you could see the whole area from above, including the silhouette of someone leaving the harem doors.
Normally, you wouldn't have bothered with the "door bell pranks", but you made your way down because 1. you're not familiar with what this might mean, maybe some royal summoned you and you're to follow the servant. 2. you're bored.
When you left the harem and looked to your left, spotting the back of a girl in red dress, you knew she was baiting you to follow her. So you did, turning around the corridor only to be body slammed to the wall.
3 women surround you, blocking any escape routes. They're all glaring at you, and you recognise their faces. They're the concubines.
You clear your throat. "Well? I suppose you have something to say that you couldnt say in there."
The brunette in front of you narrows her eyes. "Who do you think you are?"
"Why dont you tell me?"
Her glare intensifies. "You think you can just bat your lashes and whore yourself to the sehzade?"
"Heh?"
The raven haired girl on her right grabbed your throat and banged your head against the wall behind. "Dont play dumb! We know you're trying to marry the prince!"
The blonde on the left banged your head against the wall this time, gritting out "Stay away from sehzade Mustafa!"
"And sehzade Mehmed!" the brunette warned, repeating the same assault as the other two.
You took a deep breath, closing your eyes as you rubbed the sore spot on the back of your head. "None of your accusations are true. Unlike you, I actually have a respectable job here-"
"We saw the bracelet! You think you can just prance around here, pretending to be this holy and pure, untainted girl while we work ourselves to the bone to get in bed?!" The brunette screamed at you, getting in your face.
You pushed her away. "First of all, I am not interested in marrying anyone. Secondly, the bracelet means nothing than a job well done. And finally- you seem to mistake your status over me. I dont work for you, or under you. So, this is for earlier-" You slapped her hard across the face, making her fall. The other two were in shock, and you took that as an opputunity to slap them too.
"Now, we're even." You huffed, adjusting your niqaab before turning on your heel to leave. You needed to slap them, not only because you need to let them know they cant bully you, but also because you needed to release some steam. It felt good, you wont lie. You may have even imagined some people's faces as you smacked them-
"Omph!" You're pushed to the ground, flipped over onto your back. You grab on to the hands that are wrapped around your neck, eyes wide as the brunette starts to choke you.
"You stupid bitch!" She screamed as you fought hard to pull her hands away. She yanked the veil off your face, smacking your cheek hard enough to scratch you with her sharp nails.
"Laira stop-" the blonde tried to pull her off you but Laira continued to beat you.
"Hand me the torch!"
"Laira-" The blonde started again but the raven haired grabbed the fire sconce off the wall and handed it to Laira.
You stared in horror as she brought the torch closer to your face, the heat radiating. She grinned manically, one hand still squeezing your throat.
"You're not even that pretty for a sehzade. Did you use black magic on them?" She clicked her tongue, while your eyes were fixated on the torch. "I guess, it wont be futile to ruin your face for guarantee."
"Please no-" she choked you harder with her man hands that you just couldnt seem to pry off, and you sort of became paralysed as the dancing flames took you back to the night in the desert, when the assassins set your tent on fire. Everything slowed down, and noise drowned out like in the movies.
Salauddin. Help-
The flames suddenly vanish from your view as Laira is thrown off you.
"What the hell do you think you are doing?!" The man roared behind you. Your eyes moved from the shaking concubines to your saviour.
Ibrahim pasha.
"Pasha bey-"
"Shut it. Guards! Throw them to the dungeons!" Ibrahim yelled and automatically, 4 Janisarries appeared from behind him and dragged the wailing girls away.
Ibrahim looks down at you, his eyes shifting from rage to sympathy. He crouches down and helps you sit up, his touch gentle.
"Are you alright, Hatun Y/n?" You're staring at him in a daze, your body has not recovered enough to physically react, almost on autopilot.
Say something.
"Y/n?" He asks again, his brows furrowing as his concern deepens. Why does everything sound so far, so low?
He snaps his fingers near your ear, and your brain finally reacts.
"Y-yes." You tear your gaze away, looking at the fire torch lying on the ground far from you.
Fire. Second time you were almost burnt to death.
"Come on." He helps you up, gently tugging you to follow him. A few shaky steps later, you follow him to your room.
He sat you down on the bed. "There we go." Ibrahim pasha scanned your face for any burns or injuries, noting the nail marks from the slap.
"Baris Agha!" Ibrahim called and a few seconds later, the eunuch stumbled in.
"Yes, pasha- ya Allah, what happened to-"
"Baris." Ibrahim snapped at him. "Get me bandages and healing balm. And keep quiet about this." Baris only nodded before following orders.
You cleared your throat. "I... thank you for saving me, pasha." Ibrahim smiled courteously as he sat on a chair nearby.
"It was my duty. Sultan Suleiman had asked me to keep an eye on you."
Your brows furrowed. "Why?"
Ibrahim looked at the bracelet around your wrist. "I suppose you did something to make him pleased."
He relaxed in his chair, crossing his arms across his chest. "So... what happened with the concubines?"
"Misunderstanding." You said dismissively.
"And what that might be?" He prodded. When you didnt reply, he sighed. "I am the pasha, the sultan's right hand. I am supposed to know what happens in the palace."
"Its nothing of significance. You can let the girls out of the dungeon."
"I'm afraid that decision is not upto you." Ibrahim deadpanned. "If you do not wish to tell me, fine. I have other ways of finding out." He made his threat clear and began standing up.
"Wait!" You clenched your niqaab, looking at the veil in your lap. "I'll tell you, but... you cant tell anyone."
Ibrahim stared at you before nodding, sitting back down.
"There may have been a rumour... the cocncubines- they think that the bracelet, a gift from the sultan means that I am... special." You mumbled the last word.
"Special how?"
"They think... that the sultan wants me to be his... daughter-in-law. Actually, they think that I am wooing the sehzades- Mustafa and Mehmed."
"And are you?" He asks immeadiately.
"Of course not!"
"Why not? Anyone would love to marry a prince."
You scoffed. "I would never want to be a part of this family, not even as a teacher."
He raised a brow. "Hate the Ottomans?" You shake your head. "No. But I wouldn't want to be a part of it." You clicked your tongue. "Everyone in this palace is a slave. The concubines, the servants, the wives, the kids, you and me too. The wives of the sultan, they have all the luxuries one could imagine... except for the loyalty of their husband. Not to mention, they have to live in constant fear of being replaced and be in paranoia forever because everyone who is not family, is a threat to her. The kids? If you're born a boy, sure- you are immediately given a superior status, but with such power and princely status also comes with its own drawbacks. The boy will have to always be compete with his brothers, not because he wants to be the next sultan, but for survival."
In Ottoman empire, there was a common practice of fratricide- a tradition where once the next sultan is chosen, the new sultan is allowed LEGALLY to kill his brothers, stepbrothers, nephews and even female relatives (sisters included) as well, so as to get rid of any future competition or betrayal by his own family. In a nutshell, it was done to prevent civil wars.
"If you're born as a girl, then you may have a better chance of survival than your brothers, but that's still not guaranteed. Not to mention, you are raised to be married off to someone that will strengthen the royal family. Not to someone you love." Ibrahim watched you as you continued. "Its not better to be a servant either. Always being threatened, questioned about your loyalty, having to take the fall for the higher ups. The eunuchs, who think they are all high and mighty and control the court, you and I both know that their job to "protect the women of the harem" wasnt even their choice. To be forcefully castrated as children, forcefully ripped from their families, forced to serve the royals... they dont have a choice. I dont have to tell you how degrading it is to be a concubine."
"And me? How am I a slave?" Ibrahim asked.
You smiled sadly. "You know very well, and youre just trying to see how much I know. Your past is not a well kept secret, pasha." You kept quiet, and Ibrahim realised you already knew about his life.
Ibrahim, born as Orthodox Christian, was enslaved during his childhood. He and Suleiman became close friends in their youth, or perhaps forced to convert to Islam and then raised to befriend Suleiman. Suleiman appointed Ibrahim as grand vizier when he took the throne.
"How do you know?" Ibrahim's gaze was sharp. "I know a lot of things, pasha. But dont worry, I have no ill intent. If anything, I want to be as far from this life as possible. Perhaps... you could help me with that?"
He raised a brow. "I dont think that is an option for you right now." At your frown, he explained. "The safest place for a woman like you is here."
"Did you just forget that my face was almost burned off moments ago?"
He chuckled, shaking his hand. "Of course not. But you need to understand that you cannot just up and go without a word, especially after the sultan just gave you a handmade gift, and whether or not it signifies that he's considered you for one of his sons, it does mean that he considers you important. His majesty will not just accept your leave for no reason." Ibrahim leaned forward, clasping his hands. "As for your safety, you can leave that to me. I will make sure no harm befalls you again. I promise."
"But what about the sehzade? The rumours?"
He hummed thoughtfully. "If you're so concerned about that matter, then you should just avoid the princes as much as you can. Keep your niqaab on, continue your lessons with the princess and avoid interacting with people as much as you can."
Well, its not a bad suggestion. If you make yourself scarce and draw less attention to yourself, you can slip out of the palace and leave unnoticed.
"Oh, pasha?" You called him as he stood up to leave. "Can I request you not to tell about this incident to anyone?" You pointed to bruises on your face.
He grinned and nodded. "Of course. But it is not me you should be worried about talking." At your confused face, he chuckled.
"Baris Agha still hasnt returned."
-
Mihirmah and Mehmed were in your room just a few moments after Ibrahim pasha had fetched the bandages from below and treated your wounds, further confirming that Baris was spreading the news about your attack all over the palace.
"Y/n! Who did this to you?" Mihirmah traced the bruises gently as she sat beside you on the bed, while Mehmed sat in front of you, on the seat previously occupied by Ibrahim pasha- just closer this time.
"I dont know." You lied, pulling yourself away from Mihirmah's concerned touches. Oh you're still mad at her.
Your evasiveness didnt go unnoticed by her, as she dropped her hand and her mouth settled into a thin grim line.
"Why did someone attack you? What happened?" Mehmed asked, cutting the tension.
You shrugged. "I dont know." You fiddled with the niqaab in your lap. There's a big bandage on your cheeks, so while you couldnt exactly wear your veil again, you suppose in a way your face was somewhat covered?
"Probably mistook me for someone else. Or just a misunderstanding." You tried to brush this off.
"Still, it shouldnt warrant such a reaction. We should investigate-" Mehmed started but you shook your head.
"Ibrahim pasha is already looking into the matter. He'll take care of it-"
"I am the sehzade. I will look into this personally." Mehmed stated before leaving the room before anyone could stop him. Ah, to be the knight in shinning armour for a distressed damsel.
You and Mihirmah sat alone now. The air in the room was thick, the silence thicker. Mihirmah glanced at your nonchalant face, your eyes fixated on the ground, not caring how uncomfortable the silence was making the princess.
It was clear she had to break the ice.
"Y/n." She called. "Yes, sultana?" You answered, but your eyes still remained on the ground.
Sultana. Not Mihirmah, like she'd allowed you to call her, but sultana.
She pursed her lips. "I..." She paused. What is she supposed to say? Sorry? The word is as foreign to her as it is to any royal.
"I dont like the things you said this morning." She finally stated. "You shouldnt have said those things."
You resisted the urge to scoff. Is she really trying to pin this on you and make you apologise? Entitled brat-
"You're right, sultana. I was out of line. I suggest we should just stick to our lessons and avoid talking about anything else. I'll be careful not to bring up any other topic." You stated monotonously.
Mihirmah frowned. Why are you saying this? Why are you being so difficult?
"Stop it." She warned. You nodded. "As you wish, sultana. I'll arrange another Quran teacher for you." Your words only enraged her further.
"I said- stop it." She ordered but you're hell bent on making her apologise- a dream, but still. You clicked your tongue. "I suppose I'll hand in my resignation to the sultan and explain to His Majesty that it was my fault for being a useless servant who is just not capable- ow!" You finally looked at her in disbelief.
She pinched you. Mihirmah pinched your arm. Hard.
And she had the gall to glare at you, with some anger and remorse in her eyes.
"What did you do that for?" You spat, hissing as you rubbed the area she'd assaulted. There was going to be a bruise, for sure.
Her frown deepened. "You- I told you to stop, didn't I?!" You watched her trying to contain her rage, her body shaking as she tried not to wrangle you by the neck. "I- I dont want you to leave."
"But sultana-" "Mihirmah. You call me Mihirmah." She emphasised.
You bit the inside of your cheek to suppress your smile. "I am just a dispensable servant-" You jumped back when she went to pinch you again.
"Will you stop doing that?!" Your arm still hurt from her first attack. Mihirmah's nostrils flared. "Will you stop acting like a brat?!"
Your throat made a sound of disbelief. "I am acting like a brat?! Have you looked in the mirror recently?"
"Yes and I look very beautiful! Unlike your busted face!"
"Oh so you just get to insult me?" "I am not insulting you! I am DESCRIBING YOU!" She screamed as you glared at her. Mihirmah took a few deep breaths to calm down. "I am not calling you ugly, I was just referring to the bruises on your face. How did you manage to get beat up so badly? Did you not learn anything from my sparring lessons?"
"Sparring lessons? You mean the times where you would flip me on my back or throw me against the wall?" She glared at your accusation. "How is it my fault that you dont fight back?"
Mihirmah's gaze flicked the arm you were holding, the one she'd pinched. "Does it still hurt?" Her voice was much softer this time.
"Would you like me to pinch you back to demonstrate how much it hurt?" You spat back and she scoffed. "I didnt pinch you that hard. You're just sensitive." "Sure, you must only have meaty man fingers." You grumbled as she gasped and smacked your bruised arm, making you hiss.
The two of you glared at each other before Mihirmah wrapped her arms around you and looked up at you with a small pout.
"This doesnt work on me." You muttered, making her grip tighten around you.
"You know you're not a servant." Mihirmah whispered, looking up at you with puppy eyes, but only you knew the real Ronda Rousey in her.
"You're my friend, Y/n. Or the closest thing I have to a sister." "If you were planning on beating up your sister, I'm glad your parents didnt have one."
"Shut up, you're ruining the moment." Mihirmah scolded you. "I dont want you to go. I dont want you to be hurt, either. So just- I'm willing to let things go back to the way they were before this morning, if you are."
You stared down at her. You knew you were never going to get a real apology, Mihirmah was too prideful. You couldnt make her feel ashamed for her actions, or hold her responsible. So, you'll have to make do with this.
"Fine." She broke into a grin and squeezed her arms around you tightly before letting go.
"Now, tell me! Who were these girls who attacked you? I'll skin them with my daggers!" Ignoring her sociopathic tendencies, you shrugged. "I dont know, Mihirmah. I dont know who they were- I'm still new to the palace."
She hummed before her face lit up in realisation. "Wait! Baris Agha did say something about concubines. I'll ask Mehmed too when he returns with more information from Ibrahim pasha!"
-
While you are trying your best to hide the incident about your attack, unbeknownst to you, the news has spread like wildfire in the palace. A maid saw Mehmed entering Ibrahim pasha's office, and when she reported it to her friend, she then told her about how she overheard the eunuchs talking about a fight breaking out between the concubines and someone else, and then someone added that they saw Ibrahim pasha, Mehmed and Mihirmah in your room, so you were involved too. It wasnt long before this news reached Hurrem and Mahidevran, only this time it was more dramatised.
"The concubines tried to kill Hatun Y/n! It was only by pure luck that sehzade Mehmed saved her! And now her wounds are being tended to by Mihirmah sultana while sehzade Mehmed and Ibrahim pasha are punishing the concubines!" Gul, the chamber maid, told Mahidevran.
Mahidevran narrowed her eyes. "Why did they save her? She's just a teacher." The queen didnt understand why the royal children were going through such lengths to get justice for you. Fights in the harem break out all the time.
Gul fumbled with her thumbs, avoiding eye contact with her queen. Mahidevran's frown deepened. "What is it, Gul?"
"I- sultana- I just heard some rumors, its probably not even true-" "Out with it!" Mahidevran snapped.
Gul licked her lips as she spoke. "Um- I overheard that sehzade Mehmed has been... spending a lot of time with Hatun Y/n. Especially after the dinner where Mihirmah sultana recited-"
Mehmed... spending time with you? Why? If he wanted to sleep with you, he could have any girl from the harem. So why you? Why you, a Quran teacher, a conservative girl who covered herself from head to toe? Surely, Mehmed hadnt been bewitched by your physical appearance- not that you had any, in her opinion. And then Suleiman seemed to like you to, so for Mehmed to fancy you would be because-
Mahidevran's eyes widened at the sudden realisation.
"Get me Mustafa. Now!"
-
"Hatun Y/n was attacked by the concubines! Ibrahim pasha saved her and carried her unconscious form to her room!" A maid reported to Hurrem.
"Why was she attacked?" Hurrem asked, bored.
The maid hesitated to answer. "I am not sure, sultana, but the word is that the concubines were jealous of the attention Hatun Y/n was getting from sehzade Mustafa."
Mustafa? No. What possible business could you have with Mustafa? From the past week's events, Hurrem was told that you'd spend most of your time with her daughter, and only moments with Mehmed when he visited his sister.
"Mustafa isnt interested in Y/n." Hurrem stated, more to herself than to refute the maid's claims.
The girl nodded. "I'm only telling you what I heard, sultana. And... I also saw sehzade Mustafa leaving Mahidevran sultana's chambers to visit Hatun Y/n earlier today, just moments before I came here!"
Hurrem halted as she tried to make sense of the information. Mustafa was out all day because of the hunt, he wasnt supposed to return before dinner. Which means, he was fetched, likely by Mahidevran. Who probably informed him about your attack and now he went to check on you.
But why? Even at the dinner the other day, Hurrem didnt detect any sort of affection from Mustafa for you, or you from him. You both barely glanced at each other.
Maybe he's just checking in on you. That's all it is to it.
"How badly was Y/n injured?" Hurrem inquired.
"I didnt get a chance to see her yet, she's been with Mihirmah sultana since the event, but I heard that her unconscious body had to be carried by Ibrahim pasha himself! And- and that he even bandaged her up-"
"Ibrahim pasha?" Hurrem whispered to herself. What business did he have with you? He could've easily had a servant tend to your wounds, so why did he personally do it himself?
Ibrahim. Mustafa. Mahidevran. What are they upto? Hurrem knows Ibrahim doesnt like her, that he favours Mahidevran and Mustafa over her, that he wants Mustafa to be the next sultan-
Hurrem's heart sinks as she pieces it together.
"Get me Mehmed. Now!"
-
Suleiman was having dinner with his family. Both of his families- Mahidevran and Mustafa joined him tonight as well. He was happy to have them together, all well and healthy.
Except... something was off.
Suleiman's gut could sense it. The children were making small talk, his wives as well, but he could tell. There was some sort of tension.
It was Mihirmah that made him finally speak up.
"Mihirmah." He called out the girl who was playing with her food. "You've barely eaten. What's wrong?"
The room immediately fell dead silent, the attention now focusing on Mihirmah.
She smiled nervously, taking a small bite. "I'm fine, baba."
But Suleiman could see that her usual bubbling aura was somewhat depressing. "Mihirmah." He called her name more sternly, and this time, her smile faltered as she finally spilled.
"I'm just worried for Y/n."
Suleiman frowned. And when he looked at everyone else, it was clear that they knew something he wasn't aware of.
"What happened?"
-
Baris Agha was having fun riling you up. "So, you're telling me that both sehzade Mustafa and Mehmed, the two crown princes racing to be the next sultan, are visited you?" He snickered as you shot him a glare. "Can I just suggest you to remove the niqaab for the wedding-"
"Baris! Shut up!" You raged at him. "Dont think I dont know you were the one spreading the lies about-" "Lies? About what? About you being attacked? By concubines who are jealous of your- I dont know, I'm sorry what it is that these men seem to be enraptured with-"
There are hurried, intense knocks on the door. Baris opens the door as a servant stumbles in, out of breath.
"Hatun Y/n! Sultan Suleiman has summoned you! Now!" His tone signified that you're not to waste time.
"Why did he call for me?" You whisper to Baris as the two of you rush down the hallways.
"Perhaps he wants to formally ask you to marry one of his sons-" "Baris!" He grinned. "What? I have a sixth sense-" "YOU HAVE NO SENSE!" You yelled. "Have more sense than you." Baris grumbled.
"Why are you even following me? Dont you have a job?" You wanted him to stop vexing you.
He snorted. "And what? Miss out on all the fun? Besides, you know as the future sultana, you will need me-"
"I swear, as soon as I'm finished meeting the sultan, I am going to throw you off the roof."
The two of you turned the corner leading to the royal dining hall, and you bumped face first into Ibrahim pasha's back, the man catching you by the arms before you fell on your ass.
"P-pasha? What are you doing here?" You asked, backing up once you got your footing.
"Sultan sent for me. What are you doing here?" Ibrahim asked, equally confused.
"He summoned me as well. What do you think its about?" You watched the cogwheels in his mind turn and the realisation dawn on him.
"The attack earlier." He exhaled, closing his eyes as he tried to figure out his next steps. "We cant- you cant tell him the truth!"
"You want me to lie to the sultan?" He rose his brows. "Please, Ibrahim! I- I told Mihirmah and Mehmed and then Mustafa that I didnt know who the attackers were, or why they attacked me! If you tell them the truth-"
"Y/n." He grabbed your shoulders, staring into your worried eyes. "I promised to protect you, didnt I? I intend on keeping my promises."
You both entered the dining room together, bowing to the royal family sitting there.
"Y/n." You looked up at the sultan. "Is it true? Were you attacked?"
You were quiet for a few moments, resisting the urge to glance at Ibrahim to figure what to say, before nodding hesitantly.
"Y-yes, sultan." You trailed your eyes back to the ground. These people, they were warriors. They didnt have any technology back then, and they had to rely on body language to read people.
And you didnt want to risk him catching you in a lie.
"Are you alright?" Suleiman's voice was much softer now. "Did you go to the infirmary?"
"I'm well now, sultan. Thank you for asking." You meekly answered. "I was saved in time, thanks to Ibrahim pasha."
Mahidevran's eyes narrowed at you. Ibrahim saved you? Of course, you'd lie about that, so that no one would suspect you and Mehmed getting close. She thought to herself.
"Ah, Ibrahim pasha." Suleiman's voice turned serious. "You were the one who saved Y/n?"
"Yes, sultan." Ibrahim confirmed.
"And you have the attackers in custody?"
"Yes, sultan."
Suleiman slammed his fist on the table, rattling everyone. "Then why the hell wasnt I informed of it?!" Ibrahim kept his head down as the sultan continued to rage. "Why does everyone seem to be aware of this matter, except me?! Answer me, Ibrahim!"
Hurrem couldnt help the smile that curled on her lips. She was glad to see Ibrahim getting in trouble, perhaps Suleiman will finally get rid of him for once and for all-
"It's my fault, your majesty!" You announced suddenly, and everyone's focus shifted to you. "I- I was- I was shaken up from the attack and I- I made the pasha stay with me. I was too scared- I didnt think I was safe- so Ibrahim pasha left to make arrangements to assure me I was safe! He was busy because of me. I'm sorry! If- if anyone should be punished, it should be me!"
You held your hands together tightly to stop them from trembling. The room fell silent at your explanation, with you and Ibrahim holding your breaths.
"Is this true, Ibrahim?" Suleiman broke the silence.
"Yes, my sultan." Ibrahim answered. "After I had saved Hatun Y/n, I wanted to assure her of her safety, so I was busy interrogating the concubines who attacked her. After they confessed, I wanted to check if anyone else in the harem had any ill intentions for Hatun Y/n, so I was engaged in checking everyone who could be a possible threat. I was on my way to inform you, but you summoned me before I could."
"Concubines? Why did they attack Y/n?" Suleiman asked, wanting to know the result of his interrogation.
Ibrahim answered without missing a beat. "They were jealous of Hatun Y/n's bracelet." You looked at him but the pasha kept his eyes ahead at the sultan. "From what I gathered, Hatun Y/n refused to give up His Majesty's handmade gift, and when she put up a fight to defend your present, she was subjected to a harsh beating and had her face almost burned."
Suleiman's eyes widened. "Burned? Because of a bracelet?"
"It was what the bracelet represented, my sultan." Ibrahim's statement made your heart sink. He better not tell him about the "daughter-in-law" theory.
"The concubines think that you... favour Y/n over them." Ibrahim's words set fire to your cheeks and you had to bite your lip to suppress the gasp you almost let out.
Ibrahim decided to change the "daughter-in-law" theory to "3rd wife/bedwarmer theory".
"What rubbish?!" Suleiman slammed his fist on the table again, and perhaps everyone in the room was silently grateful for his rage and disbelief, as it disapproved the theory and quelled any future rumours. "I only see Y/n as my daughter, nothing else! How dare they slander me like that?! How dare they hurt someone I care about?! Ibrahim, execute those wretched concubines!"
Your eyes widened at the order. Preventing their death sentence was the only reason you lied and kept this charade up. You cant risk more people dying and history changing forever because of you!
"Y-your majesty!" You fell to your knees, your voice wet. "I- I beg you- I beg you on the behalf of the concubines, please- have mercy!"
Everyone watched in surprise as you cried for mercy for... your attackers?
"You... want me to forgive them? Despite what they did to you?" Suleiman asked, watching in disbelief at your tears wetting your niqaab.
"It- it was wrong- but please, they're just- they're just young girls. They made a mistake, they shouldnt pay with their lives!" You tried to come up with better reasoning. Aha!
"Sultan, I- we are Muslims. You are a role model for Muslims all over the world right now- but you have a role model as well- someone you havent met or seen, but you follow his advices and footsteps every day. Its Prophet Muhammad (PBUH)- and- and he advices us to be forgiving and merciful." Ibrahim watched you try to persuade the king.
"On the Day of Judgement, when we beg and grovel Allah for forgiveness, would He not forgive us happily if we show mercy to His creatures? If we forgive His mankind?" You pleaded and Suleiman was touched by your words, so-much-so that he walked over to you and pulled you by your shoulders before pressing a kiss to your veiled forehead.
"You're too kind, Y/n." He whispered, before nodding at Ibrahim. "Dont kill the concubines. But find a fitting punishment for them, Ibrahim." The pasha bowed his head obediently.
"And find Y/n her personal chambers in the royal wing." Suleiman stated, making everyone surprised.
No. Room in the royal wing only meant more contact with the royals themselves. This was the last thing you needed-
"Your majesty-" He held up a hand. "Dont protest, Y/n. You were hurt because of my present and while I appreciate that you defended it, I do not wish to see you hurt. Ibrahim, find her a room and shift her there by tonight. And assign a few guards and servants to Y/n as well. I dont want her to feel unsafe again." Suleiman looked at Ibrahim with a serious expression. "I trust her in your hands, Ibrahim."
"Of course, your majesty." Ibrahim nodded.
Suleiman looked back at you, a gentle smile on his face. "I would like you to join us for dinners now." He gently pushed your back and Mahidevran immediately scooted a bit closer to Suleiman's seat and patted the space beside her... and next to Mustafa.
Hurrem glared at the blatant display of intentions- Mahidevran showed her "generosity and humbleness" by letting you sit next to her to please Suleiman, and also make you sit next to her son to get close with.
At this moment, both queens are under the impression that Suleiman wants you to be his future daughter-in-law, so both women think that the other is making her son court you because the first one to marry you will produce a heir, further legitimising the prince's claim to the throne and becoming the next sultan, especially since Suleiman views you to be the perfect, pious woman who would be the perfect mother for his grandkids.
The only difference is- Mahidevran wants you to be Mustafa's spouse, not because she thinks you're a good match for her perfect son, but because she wants to speed up Mustafa's claim to the throne. She knows Suleiman prefers Hurrem over her (Hurrem's five kids are proof of that), and since she has no child other than Mustafa, Mahidevran is at disadvantage and she needs every advantage she can get, no matter how savoury it is- like you.
Hurrem on the other hand, does not want you as her Mehmed's spouse, because you're not what she had in mind for her precious son. She wants someone soft, demure, submissive, beautiful and more importantly- someone she can control. But she also knows what game Mahidevran is playing, and since Hurrem doesnt want Mustafa trying to steal the throne from Mehmed, Hurrem will have to just- get rid of you.
-
"So... the sultan just said that outloud?" Baris ate a date from the fancy table in your brand new chambers. "He just announced that you're his "daughter" to everyone?" He heard you groan a yes from your place on the bed- face buried in the pillows.
"And Mahidevran sultana made you sit between her and sehzade Mustafa?" He heard you groan another "yes".
Baris plopped down next to you. "So you're marrying Mustafa. Huh, didnt bet on that-"
"You bet on this?" You asked miserably, finally pulling your head up. "Of course, need to make money. Unlike you, not everyone has the oppurtunity to marry into royalty-"
You smack a pillow right across his face. "If I hear you talk about marriage again, I will strangle you."
Baris rolled his eyes, fixing his hair that you'd messed up. "I dont know why you're so upset. Did you want to sit next to Mehmed instead? If so, maybe I can still win the bet-"
"I dont want either of them!" You stated frustratedly, sitting up. "Do you not get it- I dont want to be a part of royalty! They're- they're all mad! My life would be in constant threat- from jealous concubines, possessive mother-in-laws, throne hungry princes. I dont want that!"
"Is it because you want Ibrahim pasha?"
You blinked at him. What? "What?"
Baris rubbed his chin. "Oh come on, I saw the way you two looked at each other before you entered the dining room- how the pasha promised to protect you, even from the sultan's wrath."
"Are you like- fishing for anything? For fun?" You shake your head at him.
Baris gave you a look. "Really? What about you going in and lying to protect him? He didnt even say anything before you took the chance to save him."
"I saved him because it was the right thing to do! Not because I love him!" You exclaimed, throwing your hand in the air. "If this is how you think, please- PLEASE resist the urge to ever help me! I dont want a proposal coming from you just because you saved me from choking."
Baris glared at you. "First of all- I'm never going to be as blind as the sehzade when it comes to love. Secondly, you'd be lucky to have me as a husband. At least your offspring will have a chance at looking somewhat normal-" You lunged at him and put him in a chokehold while Baris grabbed at your hijaab covered head to pull you off.
Your fighting match is brought to a halt as someone knocks on the door.
Mustafa stands outside your door, surprised to see Baris looking slightly disheveled when he opened your door.
"Baris? What are you doing here?" Mustafa asked, watching the eunuch fix his collar.
"Ah sehzade! Oh I was just helping Hatun Y/n adjust to her room. Shift her things in here." Baris faked a smile.
Mustafa nodded before lowering his voice. "Is she awake?"
"Yes yes- please come in." Mustafa walked inside just as you appeared out of the wooden divider screen, adjusting your niqaab.
"Sehzade." You gave him a courtesy. "How may I help you?"
Mustafa gave you a gentle smile, his moustache quirking up handsomely. "I would like to ask you to spend the day with me tomorrow."
You froze, and you didnt dare look at Baris who you knew was sporting a smug look because you didnt want to throw your shoe at his face in front of the prince.
"I- I think I am busy with Mihrimah sultana tomorrow-"
"No, I asked her. She said she's happy to skip her lessons for tomorrow." Mustafa cut your excuse. "I'll come by after breakfast. Good night, Y/n."
-
Even though Mustafa said he'll see you after breakfast, which for royals was just an hour before noon, you were woken up by Baris at the ass crack of dawn.
"Baris! What the hell?" You glared at him when he yanked the covers off you. Baris grinned at you. "As much as I'd like to believe in beauty sleep, its so not helping in your case. Come on, you need a bath and a lot of other stuff!"
He'd brought fine silk gowns and matching niqaabs (which you insisted on wearing despite Baris voicing his displeasure).
Currently, one of the maids had just finished doing your eye makeup- which in this case was kohl, and some dried berries crushed to a fine powder to make a rouge sort of shade.
"Since your eyes may be the only thing the prince sees, we need to make them bewitching!" Baris had commented before spraying you down with a lot of perfume.
"That's enough!" You push the bottle away as you coughed at the musky, earthy perfume. "Isnt that for men?" You ask coughing.
Baris's grin only widened. "Its sehzade Mustafa's favourite attar! I had to bribe his chamber servant to tell me this. And you my darling-" He sprayed you again. "-need to smell like him so that he thinks you two are a perfect fit!"
"That is literally the stupidest thing I've heard-" your insult is cut short as your vision is blinded by Baris flipping up your veil to reveal your lower half of the face and him applying some crushed berries juice to your lips.
"Just in case you have a change of morals and want to kiss the prince." He jumped back when you tried to slap him.
Soon, Mustafa came to fetch you. You two were currently walking through the royal gardens, with you giving curt answers so that he would lose interest in you and leave you alone.
Your dismissal didnt go unnoticed by him. "What do you like to do for fun?"
"Read." You answer looking at the well cut hedges. "Have you been to the royal library?" He looks down at you, finding you gazing at the flowers. "Yes. I've already read all of the books there." In college, of course.
"All of them?" His disbelief makes you look at him. Finally. Mustafa thinks.
"Of course." You answer, offended.
"Even the royal ancestry book?" Mustafa raises a brow at you.
"Yes." Your brows furrow. "Ask me anything."
He shakes his head and chuckles. "I doubt you know more about my ancestors than me."
When he looked back at you, you were still looking at him expectantly.
"Ask me."
Mustafa's curiosity got the best of him at your determination.
"This is- this is incredible." Mustafa commented, his eyes wide as he looked at the ancestry book from where he basically quizzed you. He didnt know he was talking to a historian who had pulled all nighters for pretty much every major empire for finals.
"How did you learn all of this?" He asks you, still double checking your answers.
"Oh... I have good memory." You mutter, making him shake his head at you with an amusing smile.
"Of course, I should've figured. You're a hafidha, you're passionate for learning." And passionate for making money in trivias.
Mustafa closes the book. "So, since you've read every book in here, I suppose you must be bored?" He doesnt wait for an answer when an idea pops in his mind. "Come on, lets go."
You follow him, trying to keep up with his fast pace. "Go where?"
"To get you new books." He looks over his shoulder and gives you charming grin.
Your steps falter. New books? "We're leaving the palace?" He hums.
You havent left the palace since you came here, mostly because you havent been able to leave.
You match his pace. "Lets go!" And Mustafa finally sees you excited for the first time today.
With a few Janissaries and some disguise, you all head out into Istanbul. You're looking around the city like a kid in a candy store, only you're looking for a something or someone to help you fix your time machine.
The market comes into view along with the sound of hawkers trying to attract customers. Of course, the only shopkeeper who wasnt yelling was the blacksmith, allowing his hammer to garner the attention of serious clients.
He could be of use. If you're able to find some tools, maybe even get some metal films, you could try to spark a charge and trigger the time machine to work.
You start to take a few steps towards him when Mustafa grabs your shoulder and pulls you back to him. "Where are you going? Stay close to me. I dont want to lose you." He tells you, almost in a chiding tone, but his hands carefully pulling your robes around you said otherwise.
He lead you towards a bookshop. Mustafa nodded at you to go ahead, explore and get any book you want. He'll buy it.
While you were busy browsing, Mustafa couldnt help but steal glances at you. He didnt understand why he was doing this- he couldnt really see your face, or anything except for your eyes.
Your eyes, they were pretty but its not their beauty that really captivates him. Its the swirl of emotions in them. The mystery in them, like there's... more to you. Like you're hiding something.
Perhaps it was your mannerisms. Your dismissive nature, your tendency to not be impressed easily by their eccentricities or status, almost as if you've lived with royalty before.
Maybe he likes how different you treat him him. How you dont bend over backwards to please his family, or try to pursue him or his brothers. In fact, you almost seem to be avoiding them altogether.
You intrigue him. Badly. Amusingly. Adorably.
-
"I dont understand! Where could she have gone?" Mihirmah whined to her brother at lunch. Mehmed only raised a brow. "Who? Y/n? She might be in her room recovering from yesterday's events. She was pretty shaken up-"
"I already checked! She's not there!" Mihirmah sighed before laying her head in his lap, and he began patting her hair. "She went out with Mustafa but she still hasnt returned! Its lunch time and I planned on teaching her sword fight! For self defense, you know- so that she doesnt get beat up like last time."
Mehmed's hand stopped patting. "She's with Mustafa?"
She nodded. "Since morning!"
"Huh." Mihirmah sat up, looking at her brother puzzled.
"What? What is it?" She asked him.
"Nothing." He faked a smile, but Mihirmah knew him like the back of her hand. "Mehmed. Tell me."
"I just... dont understand why Mustafa is spending time with her." He stated, standing up to walk to the balcony. "She's your teacher. What business does Mustafa have with her?"
Mihirmah watched her brother stiffen suddenly, watched the way his jaw ticked as he looked down the balcony. She stood up and joined him, following his gaze to see what he was looking at.
Its you. And Mustafa. Finally returning to the palace, servants holding piles of books following behind you two. What's even more bizarre is to see Mustafa smiling down at you while you giggled, covering your mouth despite the niqaab, making you look even more bashful.
Even Mihirmah hadnt ever seen you so joyful, and yet here you are- laughing so gleefully with her eldest brother. Step brother.
It rubbed her off the wrong way.
"You want her?" She asked him, her voice so hollow that it made Mehmed look at her.
"What?"
Mihirmah looked at him, her eyes stern. "Do. You. Want. Her?"
Unwavering determination. Thats what he saw in his sister's face.
Say the word, and it'll be done.
Mehmed stared at her.
"Yes."
-
"I hope you had a good time." Mustafa asked you as he walked you to your chambers. You nodded. "I did. Thank you, sehzade." Despite your best attempts at dismissing him, Mustafa was very persistent at breaking down your walls. And sure, part of you giggled and pretended to be flustered at his words, you mainly acted cordial so that he may take you out of the palace more often. He was your only way out at the moment.
You both stopped outside your door, the servants walking past you to place your books inside. Mustafa looked satisfied.
"If you ever need to go outside again, feel free to come to me, Y/n." He offered, before taking out a small box from his pocket and handing it to you.
Your heart dropped. A ring? Now? This fast? No no no no no-
You opened the box and you felt life returning back to you. It was a gold broach adorned with rubies and a diamond in the center, encaged in an intricate heart pattern.
"I may not share my father's gift of handcrafting jewels, but I do happen to be skilled at acquiring precious jewels on my conquests." Mustafa informed you as he took the broach from the box and looked at you for permission before pinning it to your hijab, just below your collar bone.
You were too stunned to stop him or even turn down the gift, though Mustafa took your silence as awe.
He adjusted the broach.
"Perfect." He whispered, looking into your eyes.
You watched him leave with a grin, finally able to breathe when he was out of sight.
With a sigh, you enter your chambers, half expecting Baris to be sprawled over your bed waiting to tease you for details on your outing.
What you werent expecting was... her.
"Did you have fun?" The sultana asked, her eyes sharp. "I've been waiting for you, Y/n. Lets have a chat, hm?"
Shit.
-
"You're abnormal." Your hands stop adjusting your hijab as you glare at him through the mirror.
"What?"
Baris tilted his head. "You're abnormal." He repeated.
You turn around from the vanity and glare at him. "Is this another way of calling me ugly?"
"Tch. No, I have words for that." He shook his head. "I meant, you've been acting weird since yesterday, after you returned from your secret outing with sehzade Mustafa."
"You're imagining things." You mumble, turning back to the vanity mirror and picking up the broach Mustafa gave you.
Baris scoffed. "I am not. I may have been busy with the younger royal kids yesterday, but I did manage to catch a glimpse of you giggling and blushing when you returned with the prince." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "So that means, the day went good. Something happened on the way to your chambers." He narrowed his eyes at you. "Did you kiss him?"
You whipped your head. "Baris!" He palmed his face. "Sorry, I forgot you're the religious prude. Did he kiss you?"
"No, Baris! No one kissed anyone." You began pinning the broach to your hijab, the same area where Mustafa had placed it yesterday. But you werent able to, too frustrated at the interrogation.
Baris grabbed the broach from you and pinned it in place. "So, you two didnt kiss, bought you enough books to make a you a scholar, and gifted you this broach, and you're disturbed because...?"
You frowned. "I am not disturbed. You're just reading too much into this."
"Fine, dont tell me. I'll find out on my own." You walked past him to teach your Quran lesson.
As much as you'd like to think that you're sly, Baris is right. Something did happen. After you'd returned to your room, you were met there by Mahidevran sultana.
You were reasonably scared because you thought that she's here to torture you or even kill you because you've been "seducing Mustafa" or whatever rumour Baris has spread about you.
But you were surprised when she told you that she wants you and Mustafa together, in marriage. As soon as possible. For the next half hour, Mahidevran basically told you all about the likes and dislikes of her son so that you would accustom yourself to them and then emphasised how supportive she would be of you to be her daughter-in-law. She even encouraged you to... sleep with him, she didnt say it directly but you got the meaning behind her words.
At the end of her lecture, she warned you to not spend time with Hurrem or any of her offsprings, besides Mihirmah because you are her teacher and even then told you to keep your interaction strictly formal and minimum.
When she was about to leave, she spotted the broach on your clavicle and beamed, almost proudly so. When you confirmed that Mustafa gave it to you, and started to take it off to return it to her, she stopped you and told you to wear it everyday. EVERYDAY.
"My son has given you something. You should be honoured. Cherish it." Mahidevran ordered.
The main reason you didnt tell Baris about Mahidevran and her confusing but threatening demands to court Mustafa was because of Baris's blabber mouth that couldnt hold a secret if his life depended on it.
And you have enough on your plate as it is.
You enter Mihirmah's chambers, bowing as you spot her.
"Ah! Welcome! Sit, sit!" Mihirmah pats down the seat next to her and you're slightly suspicious of her energy.
She's upto something.
You sit down beside her, opening the Quran. "I think we should start with-" She closed the book in your hands.
"In a minute. Lets talk first, hm?" She smiled at you. "How was your day off yesterday? Well rested?"
Your shoulders sag slightly. Of course, she wants to know about your day out with Mustafa. Baris probably blabbered something to spark her curiosity like this.
"Yes. A much needed break. Quite refreshing." You tell her, purposely keeping away from the details, lest she gets the wrong idea again and accuses you of whoring around your "ugly self" to her brother.
"Mmhm. Had fun with Mustafa?" Her sharp tone made you look at her.
Is she implying something?
"The prince was kind enough to get me some books." You told her cautiously, trying to ease the tension. "I think you'd like some of them-"
"Mustafa sleeps around." You blinked at her. What were you supposed to do with this unsolicited information.
"Okay...?"
She shrugged, picking up her cup of tea. "I'm just saying- he's been with a lot of women. The other day I was reading a verse from Quran where it mentioned adultery. Then I realised- thats what Mustafa is. An adulterer."
"You read Quran without me making you-"
"Mustafa is an adulterer, Y/n. Allah will not forgive him. He's doomed for hell."
"Actually, if he repents sincerely-"
"He's doomed, Y/n. Doomed." She reiterated.
"By that logic, so are most of your ancestors. I think most men, kings and princes commit adultery-"
"Mehmed doesnt." She stared at you. "He's never slept with anyone. He's a good Muslim man. Allah will be pleased with him."
What is going on here? "Um... okay. That's great news for sehzade Mehmed."
"And for you." Mihirmah announced. "You are the lucky one."
"What?"
She let out a sigh of frustration, as if she has to state the obvious. "Mehmed likes you- no, he loves you-" "Loves me?" "Shh! I'm still talking. You have caught his eye for some reason, so you should end whatever it is that you have with Mustafa and be loyal to my brother."
The room was silent, the two of you staring at each other- you, in confusion. Mihirmah, in determination.
A crow croaked outside.
"First of all, I have nothing going on with sehzade Mustafa. Secondly, Mehmed said he loves me?" You asked while trying not to show resentment.
Mihirmah scoffed. "He doesnt have to say it, I know it."
Your tension deflates to some extent. Okay, so she's just making up stuff. This can be handled.
"Mihirmah, I understand how-" you resist the urge to roll your eyes "-you may think Mehmed may be attracted to me, I am honoured, really. But I can assure you, Mehmed does not love me."
"No, I love you." Your head whips around at the sound of his voice.
Mehmed. He's standing behind you.
"Sehzade-" you begin standing up to bow to him, but he holds up a hand.
"Mihirmah's right. I love you." Mihirmah beamed proudly at standing correct.
Your eyes could only widen in horror as Mehmed sank down to sit right beside you, and with Mihirmah on your other side, you were trapped between the siblings.
"I. Love. You." Mehmed repeated, his hazel eyes staring into yours.
After several moments of silence, a crow croaked again. Mihirmah nudged you to say something.
"Um-" You cleared your throat. "Ugh... thank you."
Mehmed's brows shot up in surprise while Mihirmah broke into a fit of laughter.
"Thank... you?" Mehmed asked, and you would've thought he was mad if it werent for the amused smile on his face.
Mihirmah continued to laugh, and you had to look back at her to make her stop. "I-I'm sorry, Mehmed- this was- this was just too funny. I mean, she has a prince, the next heir of the empire confess her love and all she says is "thank you"?" She said, chuckling as she wiped the tear from her eye.
Mehmed glared at her playfully. "Well, maybe she's just shy around you." Why are they talking about you like you're not right there?
Mihirmah hummed, then nodded. "Perhaps you're right. I'll leave you two lovebirds alone. I have to do something-"
"What? Why? You dont have anything to do." You stopped her from standing up. You dont want to be alone with Mehmed.
"I do!" She narrowed her eyes at you.
"Like what?"
"Like-" her eyes zeroed in on your broach. "-pretty. Mustafa gave it?"
"Yes-" you yelped as she grabbed it and pulled it off you, ripping the niqaab it was pinned with along.
"Mihirmah!" Mehmed yelled at her, his eyes stern. You could only stare at her in disbelief before turning away from Mehmed to hide your bare face now.
"Oops! I'm sorry Y/n! I'll go get you a new niqaab- this one is all torn!" She said without an ounce of remorse before leaving the room.
Mehmed shakes his head as he watched her leave, before turning his attention to you- or well, your back.
"Y/n?" He called out to you softly. "I'm sorry for Mihirmah. She... she doesnt mean you any harm. She's just- she sometimes doesnt realise how hurtful her actions can be when she's trying to help someone."
When you didnt reply, Mehmed grew slightly worried. "Y/n?" He sighed when you didnt reply. An idea popped in his head as he looked around the room before looking down.
You heard the sound of cloth ripping, your heart dropping as you assumed the worst. He wasnt going to-
Your head turned around just as Mehmed's hands encircled around your head, a red cloth blocking your view of him.
"Mehmed?" You whispered, scared. His frozen hands seemed to snap out of it and began encircling round your head, the red cloth in his grip brought closer to your face. Thats when your eyes landed on the bottom of his red shirt (kemis). It was ripped.
Mehmed had torn his shirt to make a niqaab for you.
His eyes were focused on tying the makeshift veil, securing it before they landed on you.
"Y/n?" He called your name gently again, his concern growing at the sight of tears pooling in your eyes. He softly sighed as a his hand reached up to wipe a tear that escaped your eye.
"You're that scared of me?" After a few moments, you sniffled as more tears escaped your eyes and you shook your head. "Then?" When you didnt reply, or couldnt as you continued to cry mutely, he took it as a sign that you were humiliated because of Mihirmah removing your veil.
He took a deep breath and cupped your face gingerly before pressing a tender kiss to your forehead.
"My mind is occupied by you. I think about you all the time. Perhaps...I only think about you, moon." He wiped another tear with his thumb. "I love you, my moon. I fear I... I love you too much. My heart holds so much love for you, I can hardly call it my own anymore." He then kissed your teary eyes one by one.
"I know you... you dont love me yet, but one day, when you find yourself being generous, I want you to be the one holding my heart in your hands. Its yours, moon. Yours."
-
Baris waited with a few guards and servants outside Mihirmah's room, when Mehmed left the room with a satisfied smiled on his face. Baris noted the bottom of his torn shirt but before he could comment on it, Mehmed asked him where Mihirmah was.
"She went to see sehzade Mustafa. Shall I fetch her?" Mehmed waved him off, saying he'll go get her himself, after all- Mihirmah still had to finish her lesson with you.
Mehmed had just turned around the corner when you came out of the room.
"Y/n-" Baris called out to you but you sped past him, and he didnt chase after you when he saw your red eyes.
He'll tease you later, when you're not so sad. For now, he has to report the sight of this to someone.
-
Even if Mihirmah hadnt bumped into Mustafa and proudly showed off the broach he'd gifted you, the news would've still somehow made its way to him by the servants whispers.
"Oh this broach? Its pretty, isnt it?" Mihirmah smirked, showing it off to Mustafa. "Y/n gave it to me."
"She... gave it to you?" His gift. You gave it away?
She nodded. "Mmhm. She said it wasnt that precious to her, so she gave it. She was going to throw it away, but it went well with my dress so I took it."
You were going to discard his gift? Just like that?
"Mihirmah. There you are." Mehmed walked over to her. "Mustafa." He greeted his brother.
"Mehmed." He looked at his shirt. "What happened to your shirt?"
Mehmed grinned. "Nothing." He then looked at Mihirmah. "Come on, Y/n is waiting for you. I talked to her."
Mustafa could only watch the two siblings beam at each other as the taste in his mouth soured.
His broach. Torn shirt. Mehmed "talked" to you.
Mahidevran could feel her blood boil at the complaints Mustafa brought to her. Even if he didnt, the maids she'd hired to spy on you had already reported of everything they'd witnessed. You and Mehmed alone in Mihirmah's room.
Did you not understand a single word she said? Does she need to give you a more stern warning this time?
"Hurrem must've put them upto this." She muttered, before her gaze flickered to her worried son. She placed a hand on his shoulder. "Dont worry, Mustafa. I will fix this. You focus on Y/n, hm? You deserve her, my lion."
So? How was it?
Part 10 is here!
#time traveller au#ottoman empire#ottoman#yandere baldwin#yandere Salauddin#yandere x you#yandere x#yandere x reader#male yandere#yandere male#yandere#yandere x darling
940 notes
·
View notes
Text
i need to preface this meta with a million versions of "i do not think ludinus is or ever will be a good person who deserves forgiveness or will have a happy ending", and it will take me a second to get to my perhaps bad point, but here we go:
as many (and myself) have noted, ludinus is blinded by his trauma. he cannot in any way shape or form see around it, and even though he is very wise, intelligent, and able to mediate almost any conflict of interest, he becomes childishly closed in when anyone challenges his idea, says that his crusade of warfare against the gods has hurt thousands of mortals. he is an active danger in his position of power by refusing to show care for anyone but himself, while convinced hes doing it for exandria.
i think this stems out of the fact that no one has ever been able to reach him in a way he craves. he can get validation of trauma from the vanguard, but he made them thralls to his ideas; do they really mean it or did he manipulate them into it? he obviously cant be validated in his grief by vasselheim and their stranglehold on calamity history, who think any heretic outside of their worship of warlords deserved their fate. and he cant find comfort in fellow calamity survivors, either due to not knowing they were alive (presumably devexian, alyxian), or being angered and in disbelief they chose to pursue religion despite their torture (leylas). because no one starts with the goalpost of saying his people didnt deserve their fate and that his anger is valid, he has been losing his mind with the belief he needs to forcibly show everyone what he experienced and for the world to see him as correct, after an eon of being the only one in his mind with a semblance of a correct pov.
which brings me to my point, which people will react badly to initially, but god, i need to say it aloud: the most important line he has ever said, which has rung in my head like a bell since last episode, is:
"Speak your mind, and I will speak mine. But all I ask is a moment. To show you."
ludinus has refused to entertain anyone else's pov as long as we have known him. fearne mouthing off at him one too many times about the vanguard caused his calm demeanor to snap in favor of him snarling at her about what he had seen in the calamity. he made his speech at the key as everyone there was actively trying to kill him. he never asked a soul for their input on what he was doing. not one ounce of him wants another perspective. and that isnt because hes scared of being called a tyrant. he tells exandria to "make me your villain", and there are so many moments of self hatred in his interactions with others i think he knows damn well what he is. no, hes terrified that someone will invalidate what he went through.
and he has asked the bells to witness the calamity's trauma firsthand, and to judge it and him freely. that is.... a massive change.
before you react, no. ludinus cant be fixed. no persuasion check in the world could convince him to forgive the gods and no one would ever allow him to walk with no consequences and start anew - as if his body wouldnt fall apart before that anyway. but the bells are at the only moment in history where ludinus is completely stuck between reality and his hero complex. almost nothing has gone his way and the world is rallying against him and evontra'vir itself said the bells were destined to defeat him and that is more preordained than the gods deaths and he knows he must teach them the truth but what if his methods were truly for nothing? he needs someone, anyone, to tell him something, to ground him. he will do his best to convince the bells of what he thinks. but he knows he has to leave a decision up to them. the next generation.
he didnt consider what they thought until now. isnt that a sobering thought for him.
and while they dont owe it to him, if the bells actually start the conversation by acknowledging what he went through? i think for the only time in exandrian history, the only moment that it will ever be feasible.... that you could move his second goalpost by starting at his first. those abused & grieving due to him will finally be able to say that to him, by sating the need hes had for 1000 years. and i think he will absolutely accept whatever else is thrown at him if it means someone listened. he will never give up on killing the pantheon. but i think this is the moment that will define whether he dies by the bells hands, or at the bells side against another system. this is the only time that his fate is in flux. and this is the only time this old dog can learn a new trick: that the role of parent can be guidance, and defense for the children you hurt. and acceptance that has been the parent, who must step up, now, or never again.
#posts i know i will be vagued for for months#ludinus da'leth#critical role#critical role meta#van speaks#long post#and yes to clarify as i said in the post i know he will try to convert them and thinks he is right#but ASKING to debate them is asking for someone to talk to him as more than a pawn and thats more than weve seen of him
27 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi! I wanted to Say that I love your art and your naruto analisys!! And i wanted to ask You, how You think an alternate universe where naruto's parents and the uchiha massacre didnt happen? I have Seen the anime, other fans and movies try to come with what it might be but i wonder what You think on how it would be. I personally think that the anime and the movie are a bit too exaggerated on the what if when it comes to the teams
Thankyou! đ
Ah, there are so many things to consider. We'd sorta have to... ignore why the bad stuff happened? Or deal with the consequences differently? (Like, as in, fixing the system, that would be nice.) I'm not sure about the anime, but I do remember seeing it in that one movie where they're all the opposite of their true selves. Where Sasuke is suddenly straight, lol!
If Naruto's parents survived, I'd like to think that Minato as Hokage could've changed things.
What would he do? Would Minato have been able to mediate fairly? Unlike Tobirama or Hiruzen?
How would Minato handle Danzo? Would Danzo still be free to make his own decisions "for the greater good of Konoha, excluding the Uchiha" because Hiruzen took the easy route and let someone else deal with things? And if Minato knew about his plans regarding the Uchiha, would he stop Danzo?Â
I'd like to believe he would. I mean, he'd definitely needed to step up way more than the 3'rd "voicing out disagreement" that was weak af. In fact, going soft on Danzo with his flabby-ass, incompetent bs and proving how little power a Hokage has in general is pathetic.Â
No, you know what? I think things would've definitely been so very different had Naruto's parents been alive. Minato also had that fight with "the masked man." Had he survived, he could've teleported to Tobito later, no? Actually⊠the more I think about it, the more I realize how much could've easily been avoided ;-;
What if the Uchiha took leadership over ANBU? Because it seems to me that the villagers view the ANBU as protectors, while the police are more strongly associated with being the ones who will punish you for wrongdoing. That may 'help' a village, but it certainly doesn't help a clan you're singling out. Like Orochimaru said, this authority did nothing to unite the clans or demolish certain boundaries.
Anyway...
Naruto would learn more about the Uzumaki. Imagine Naruto as the second flash junior with his Uzumaki adamatine sealing chain Jutsu's listennnn. In an instant, any enemy would be chained.
He also could've made a barrier rasengan or something, or Sasuke could target thunder or amaratsu from within it as a combi-jutsu and no one would be able to escape. It would color black and white like the yin/yang symbol.
"Is thatâ"
"Ah.. It's the great, unstoppable dome of death!"
"Oh."
But it would also sprout life because of the yin & yang. Look, what if Itachi trained Sasuke to use his hawk more like he had with his crow, and then he'd be able to send Naruto little memories while he's traveling? Not notes, genjutsu memoriessss. Things he'd like to share. And he'd wear Naruto's teleportation mark so they could always meet up instantly.Â
Mikoto and Naruto would create a frog-pond in the garden; this is not negociable. Sasuke would pretend he couldn't understand, but he would sneak off to feed and talk with the frogs while taking advantage of the peace to meditate, and Naruto pretends not to notice, taking food with him anyway and complaining that they won't take it.Â
Naruto and Sasuke would always challenge each other during festivals where you could play games. They'd visit other places to play different ones, and they'd be known as rivels through that. Both gaining their own fan clubs, and entire competition days would be held so people can come watch as they go at each other while they toss rings, mold candy, or scoop balls out of water and then think of punishments for the loser.Â
Ah yeah Sasuke would definitely play some type of flute, Naruto would play Taiko drums.
Oh stop me now I could go on forever tbh.
16 notes
·
View notes