#sun grieving and trying to be strong for moon is good!!!

[socksandbuttons]

The thing that is out of place in the episode to me is sun crying about solar's death. They never were close. The most that can be considered bonding between them is when solar turned into a candy corn and when they had guys night with moon which is off screen. solar was mean to sun that one time. so for sun to cry and have a hard time breaking the news to lunar and earth is just so out of place. I don't have any other words for it. Just out of place

"They were never close" That we know of! We know Earth had her offscreen time with Solar. And while we dont see sun and Solar interact a lot, it's clear enough that Sun still cared. while We got more Moon and Solar vibin then Sun and Solar despite Solar's whole being his own Sun to thank (also i just think its literally due to one voiceactor voicing both, there IS limitations here and there). But i think thats enough implication. But Sun still liked Solar, he was well aware Moon and Solar were besties. He still hung out with solar, Solar was family to him too. But sun taking it upon himself to tell Lunar and Earth is a mercy to moon too in a sense. Plus like... voiceactor wise itd be best. I get canonly we didnt get a lot but like implication wise- I think its fair.

[deviouscrackers]

I brained

ANYWAYS I had an idea of how to rewrite Nexus's villain arc. I didn't really care for it either way, so these are ideas to make it more interesting (at least to me).

I write this with the intention to follow the TSBS writing rules that I am aware of, but I don't know many so… my bad ig.

(This also got long, can you tell I like writing shit like this?)

First of all, what did I not like about Nexus? Well, like many, I wasn't all that fond of the rate he became evil. I didn't like his motivations, which is somewhere between wanting to become an unstoppable powerhouse and wanting control of his life? I think?

Not bad motivations, yes, but how he got to those motivations? Mm… no…

Another thing I wasn't fond of regarding Nexus would probably be his behaviour as a villain, and the lack of respect everyone gave him. Nexus, and other characters, take himself and his goals quite seriously.

Nexus is a threat.

However, he doesn’t act like one, nor does anyone else really behave like he is. Half the time it feels like they're watching some snot-nosed kid sharing his new war story he made with his plushies.

Thirdly, the whole prior arc Nexus had going on before becoming Nexus just became irrelevant. Now, I don't want to sound too much like a conspiracy theorist, but this drop in care for Solar happens to have been around the time shipping discourse got really bad. Just before I joined the fandom, essentially.

Anywho!

So here is how, in hindsight, I would have written this (Please, please, please remember that I have no ill will to the writers or anything. Yes I'm disappointed with Nexus, but in all honesty this arc was not the absolute worst and it had its very good moments. I'm just sharing my own ideas).

Taking how focused Nexus got on reviving Solar, I would have his villain arc more focused on it.

His old motivations:

Power

Control

New motivation:

Bringing back Solar/Keeping His Family Safe

Don't worry! This still encompasses power and control, but in a way that links back to his previous behaviours.

First event I’d change would be when Nexus kidnapped Earth with Bloodmoon.

Quick disclaimer, I skipped through that set of episodes because I was like, four straight days into trying to watch every lore vid and hadn't been to school for any of those days, but to better align that event with how I'm changing Nexus, it'd have to be Lunar or Sun that got kidnapped.

Why? Well, Nexus actually had a good relationship with Earth and him thinking of her as mere collateral makes no sense. On the other hand, Sun and him had a rocky relationship at the time and from what I can tell Lunar and Nexus weren't incredibly fond of eachother.

Plus, Nexus could justify attacking Lunar as he thought Lunar would've been strong enough to take it or protect himself specifically.

So now Nexus is floating in space; angry, hurt, dejected, hapless… and who should come to his rescue but Dark Sun? In this version, Dark Sun would offer Nexus shelter and anything he wanted as long as Nexus did some tasks for him. Hysteric and grieving, Nexus agrees to go with him.

Nexus is definitely hesitant about the Dragon and Dark Star Power. As long as Dark Sun and Nexus aren't about to kill each other at every turn that should work and stay somewhat the same as canon.

If you can't tell this is (so far) sticking to canon progression as much as possible.

Moving on, Monty brings back Moon just the same as canon. The only difference is that it takes longer for Earth to warm up to Moon, considering she hasn't heard the best stuff about his attitude.

Skipping to when Moon and Nexus meet, I imagine there'd be heavy miscommunication between Moon and Nexus. Moon would leave the conversation assuming Nexus doesn't mean well for anyone in the family and Nexus would leave the conversation assuming that they had never liked him and were only waiting for him to leave before replacing him. Both their hackles would be raised.

When Solar is revived, he immediately asks about Sun and Nexus, because they were the last people he saw. He then immediately follows up with the rest of the family. Upon hearing about Nexus “turning evil”, Solar goes into denial, refusing to believe it until he sees it.

How I imagine Solar and Nexus meet is as follows: Dark Sun gives Nexus another task, data collection. Nothing harmful, he assures. Nexus obliges because these tasks are essentially how he pays rent, and he can't leave yet. While waiting for the data, Nexus decides to pay Moon a visit.

After finding the new address (something that infuriates him, because did the house he bought with Sun just mean nothing now that Moon is back?) Nexus enters and taunts Moon. Teasing turns into a genuine argument between the two, which Solar walks into. Nexus and Solar freeze upon seeing each other, Nexus leaving shortly after.

A quick thing to note, is that around this point, Nexus’s behaviour isn't too different, but he's beginning to become very unstable. The reasoning for this is because in this version, the Wither Storm’s proximity is causing issues, to both Nexus and Ruin. Dark Sun is fine due to him not being in the dimension for too long, but Nexus ends up actually going insane (or close to it) and Nexus is slowly dipping into insanity. He is not aware of this until it's far too late.

So in Nexus's mind, he's rejoicing that Solar is alive, but is horribly panicked that someone dangerous like Moon is near Solar. So while he spends time making a cell/room for Solar, to keep him safe, Dark Sun manipulates him into using Dark Star Power to further protect Solar.

From then on, Nexus makes several attempts to get Solar to come with him, first with offers, then with manipulation, then…

Then with force as Nexus gets increasingly hysterical.

Other things he'd do, Nexus would still need the wither shards so he'd still go after Sun. He'd also try and get Earth to come with him because she's similarly important to Nexus.

As his mental state deteriorates, he’d begin to act more like the Nexus we know, if a little less pathetic. Just a little.

I'm no good at endings and fine-details however, so I wouldn't know what ending to give him. The ending we got works pretty well for this, though it'd be far more adjusted to include more elements of whatever Dark Sun was doing.

[ihavetoomanyocsdealwithit]

Stone Heart Au: Scar pt II

His Mother's Son

“A hunt gone horribly wrong.” Yuu had waited until a quiet night with a strong drink to ask, had given him time to mull over how to answer. His Mother’s son. That’s what he said. “She was the most experienced hunter at that point and was close to retirement. It wouldn’t have been her last, but it was a dangerous one and they wanted her professionalism for the new recruits. Afterall, while our coats blend into the canyon walls, there isn’t anywhere to truly hide.

So they went, a pack of wildebeast led by Boma, the same one that had given me my scar. She said she would bring me his horns! But I don’t know if she actually would. She was a vengeful sort, the same as I, but what had happened with Boma was several years in the past.  

We waited, as the gorge was at least a three day walk from Pride Rock, but after five days with no word I was restless. I went out to the gorge myself, with Shenzi and the others meeting me half way.  

It was a complete accident. I see that now, as an old man. But then, then it was the Ancestors taking the only person in the world that loved me." He takes another sip, eyes closing.

"The wildebeest had started a stampede, trying to stamp out our warriors through size and speed. An apprentice was climbing up the side of the cliffs trying to get out of the herd's way. I don’t even remember her name now.” He huffs, taking another sip. He takes another breath. “But I remember my Mother, fearless and compassionate, a protector first and foremost, hooking her claws into her wrist guards to pull her up.”  

"It should have been another.” he growls, “It should have been any of her team to help. But they stood by-no. No.” He breathes, as if having his conversation with himself a thousand times before. “It wasn’t anybody's fault. It doesn’t change that by pulling her up, she lost her balance and simply...fell."

He tips the glass back, draining the dregs. Taka carefully eyes the whiskey bottle at Yuu’s feet before shaking his head. This was an old wound. He had grieved. He would be better this time.  

“I don’t know what happened really after. I was told that Shenzi and Ed ran ahead to the herd and started leading them down a dead end, away from her body. Sarabi knew them, and told the others to follow their lead. Sarabi was always a good woman, to the end.  

I slid down the gorge, and I remember holding her body, begging her heart to beat once more, her lungs to move, but there was nothing. Her hands mangled, her ribs broken, but her face...her bright red diamond dim with blood.  

There was no sound in that gorge other than the cries of myself, and the warriors. I refused to leave her body. I couldn’t."

He pauses, lost in the memory. Yuu carefully shifts closer, taking one of his hands and just squeezing. He huffs, looking away before inhaling through his nose.

"Tradition stated that she be burned at Pride Rock, at home, with all the honors that a Queen should expect. But by the time we would make it her body would have been...rotting. I insisted, at the very least, facing the Sunrise, out of the shadow of the gorge. Facing the direction of her homeland.

As night eased into morning, I carried her body out. As the sun banished the moon, I sung the funeral rights in her mother tongue while they gathered wood and kindle. I, along with the Hunting Captain, lit the fire just as the sun rose, painting it red and gold and pink. I danced the steps of her people, the names of her father and kings, so that they may come greet their daughter in the sky. I prayed that her star shine brighter than any damn king of the past."

King Regent Ahadi and King Mufasa arrived as her embers were cooling and the sun was high in the sky. They wept, but my tears had run cold.  

When Mufasa turned to me, reached for me, he asked for his brother.  

He flinched. I remember he started crying again, but I didn’t understand why at the time. 

“My name is Scar, I told him.” He whispered, the air still.  “My name is Scar.”  

[brightstar2000]

Freaking knew it! Dark Sun was behind it! And i had a feeling he was slowing Eclipse down to buy time for Moon to reach this point. Don't know what he plans to do with him, but i bet it's not good. We know Dark Sun doesn't like Moons.

I am so glad Eclipse is better now though, and to learn that what he needs to do to get Solar back would take maybe a day tops to do, yea, i see why Dark Sun slowed him down despite giving him the information to get Solar back. To drive Moon to the point of no longer caring. I do wonder how he's going to feel when he finds out Solar is back after he left. Cuz I have little to no doubts that Solar is going to be back very soon now that Eclipse is no longer inhibited.

On another, less happy note, i am still seeing people defending Moon, and just.. why? His actions cannot be justified. Grief, psychosis break, insanity, it doesn't matter now. He still did those actions knowingly and willingly. He nearly killed Earth knowingly and willingly. He drove his family away knowingly and willingly.

Yet unlike the other villains who come from backgrounds that are similarly or more tragic still get hated on when they were first introduced as a villain. Like OG Eclipse. Someone who was torn out, abandoned, trapped, who was confused and scared because he didn't understand what happened to him or why it happened to him, becoming solely angry and lashing out when he finally got strong enough to break out, and doing horrible acts. He had a tragic backstory that led him down his path to villainy, and nobody excuses or defends his actions. And he only ever murdered one person, and that was to protect himself, and subsequently Sun too (gov interview video). He only hurt Lunar in a pretty minor way that he could recover from, physically, pretty quickly. Just a slap. (Still not okay at all, but i am going somewhere with this.) He felt some remorse for it too. (Also important) And yes he said some very mean things. Mainly taunted them, and just sent them to some places they needed to escape from, and could, relatively easily, most times. (Except the witherstorm eps. They had to beat it before they could leave) For the most part though, he left them unscathed.

Then Moon who was initially just suffering from grief of losing Solar, verbally attacked his family after Eclipse tried to get him help and they confronted him with an offer to help, which he refused. He hurt Eclipse v4 for doing it too by breaking his fingers (note: worse than a slap). He was so relentless in trying to kill Blood Moon that even when Earth was present, he literally just called her Colaterall Damage and proceeded forward with it anyways! He had no care for her! He felt no remorse! If not for Puppet, Earth would be dead, and Moon would not care! And she got a bad burn from it too, ehich is gonna stick around for a while too! (Way worse than a slap)

Yet people still defend him just because we actually see his spiral down into insanity. Just because he wasn't a villain at first!

Everyone knows the saying: "Villains aren't born, they're made."

This literally applies to every villain on any show ever! This applies to Moon! This applies to OG Eclipse! Both of which were innocent at first!

And people still try to defend Moon for his unjustifiable, and unforgivable actions! Where is the sympathy for the other villains? Why are they not touched on as much? Because they were dropped on us as villains from the get-go! Even knowing their backstories, nobody touches on them as much because of that fact! We just go "Oh okay, still doesn't excuse their actions."

Meanwhile New Moon still has people defending him just because he was not a villain at his first inception. After Solar died, yes, i can understand he was grieving in his own right, even if it wasn't a healthy way to grieve. There is a reason that Anger is known as one of the five stages of grief. Yet this has extended far past grief now.

His family tried to extend their olive branch to him multiple times. He smacked it out of their hands. Every time. So i do not blame them for no longer trying. He didn't want their help, and he made that abundantly crystal clear. They still were trying to stop him from doing something stupid with reviving Solar, but also, at this point, it's not about Solar at all anymore.

Moon is a villain now. No more, no less. Even if in the past, he was a better Moon than Old Moon, he is way worse now. There is just a certain point where one cannot defend a person anymore. Moon has long since reached that point. At least for me.

And i apologize for the rant, but i really needed to get that off my chest. I don't like what's happening either, but it is.

[ivesambrose]

𝐀𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐢 𝐌𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 💕

This is based on your sidereal/Vedic signs.

Use moon & rising mostly, you can use your sun too 🧡

To book a personal reading with me you can DM or email me with your query at Ivesambrose@gmail.com

Personal Readings

Masterpost

Thank you for the tip 🌹

Aries : So much to learn, so much to seek, get out of your head first it's keeping you from the breakthroughs you seek. Emotional bliss is on the other side of self conceived thoughts of doom. Although you'll be working with people and making progress especially proffesionally and academically you'll want to recuperate and take some time out to study or gather information on something of your own or you'd like to focus on your spiritual side a little more. There will be a necessary change in your routine and eating habits. Mint and other herbs will be beneficial. Avoid being too self critical when it comes to speed of your progress.

Taurus : It seems that a lot of people from near and far want to be close to you as friends or more. While you're in a more independent and non chalant energy. You'll be a lot more honest and straight forward, lacking filter in a way. You have concluded that those who want to stay will stay otherwise they can leave, you don't want to pretend anymore. Expect a lot of people coming to you for advice and guidance, especially younger ones. You'll be preparing for foreign travel, might get sudden wealth. You may be overly focused on your appearance too. Pay attention to your higher self/Intuition/subconscious/dreams etc more than the opinions of others this month.

Gemini : Opportunities come to you sooner once you make your well being a priority. You're running on a critical clock that might be taking a toll on you whether you realize it or not. Be a little less methodical and more meditative and relaxed in your approach. Make art for the sake of making because you were inspired and not for validation. You'll find yourself healing the person in you that feels the need to defend themselves constantly and come out strong. It's okay to break and cry once in a while, it's cathartic. You'll still have a lot of successes and allocades to celebrate. Give yourself a break this month.

Cancer : You'd want to come out of yout shell and socialize a little more. You've gone through an intense time period in the past couple of months either you've dealth with some heavy transformation or loss and you needed time to grieve or simply be. You'll be feeling a lot more confident, expressive and creative. Might want to join a group or workshop of sorts or simply take a trip somewhere warmer. You'll have a lot of happy moments and connections to look forward to that will let your inner child shine as well. You'll look in the mirror and find the person you thought you had lost. Practice gratitude and you'll see your blessings multiply.

Leo : Cool your head and avoid unnecessary conflict and burn out. You'll be tempted to react or say something harsh especially while dealing with nitpicky people or those in authority who are trying to dominate or criticize you constantly and dull your shine. It's best to draw boundaries. You'll be focusing on changing your diet, perhaps eating foods that keep you cool. You'll have a lot of energy but might feel exhausted sooner. There will be good progress in multiple areas of your life and even travel if you keep your mindset in check and act with wit. You may also doubt the progress you're making, don't do that. Avoid debt and unecessary expenses, you may also receive unexpected money from someone as well.

Virgo : Need to self soothe, nurture and be nurtured. You might be feeling very empathetic or just receptive to others emotions a lot. Please make sure to detach once in a while so that you don't feel energetically depleted. You might be signing some contracts or entering into some partnerships or agreements. Intuition will be very high, you'll sense what other's don't and you'll be right. You may feel moody too since you'd like to be in control of your feelings and analyse them but find it difficult to. You may have some people being a tad obsessed with your energy too. Lot of necessary transitions and endings to pave way for what you want. Encountering kindered spirits. Happy moments with your family and monetary success in business/your career.

Libra : Following your bliss and taking a leap of faith. You'll know when the time is right you wouldn't have to calculate. You might feel disheartened in matters of love and relationships of any kind. You'll feel disappointed looking back at certain scenarios and with whatever you have currently. This will change eitherway. Just know you have a lovely journey ahead if you stop nitpicking the mistakes you have met. You'll likely meet a loyal friend online and meet them in person soon, it will either be emotionally very fulfilling or make you want to pursue something more with them later down the line.

Scorpio : Rediscovering joy and manifesting something sweet and meaningful through your imagination alone. You'll know who and what to leave behind and who and what to connect with. You'll realize you seek people who bring out the dreamy side of you that you have shut out for a very long time now in fears of being judged. That you deserve to toss your mask aside too. You'll be completing and closing a few projects that you've been working on any legal matters that you have been dealing with also come to a close. You may hold back again and shut of your feelings in between because you may have taken up too many new tasks. Remember you'll receive what you give this month. Allow yourself to be less complex for once.

Sagittarius : Things are finally picking up. Like a bun rising in the oven. Although it doesn't feel too quick and too scattered, you have a vision in mind that you know you'll reach. It's promised so you're worried a little less. Be wary of taking on too many endeavours because you suddenly feel too excited. Do workouts that are more fun and less intense. You may also feel extra competitive at work or school/uni or just in the pursuit of your life goals. Keep in mind there's no need to compete with anyone or anything, every success in due time for you to celebrate.

Capricorn : You've been growing in the most dire of environments it seems. You shouldn't have to survive. Embrace your rebirth and the path unfolding for you with grace. You may feel like visiting places from your childhood or activities and hobbies you enjoyed as a kid. You'll find a work and family/personal life balance even if it may not be a permanent thing, you'll get to relish the time you spend with your loved ones. Finances might be iffy in the beginning but will pick up later.

Aquarius : Finally much needed solitude. Maybe where you're at, maybe elsewhere. You may want to be near water more just to feel calm. Your stars are guiding you to heal and towards connections that feel like they were a part of you for eons to begin with. Allow yourself to rejuvenate. You may also visit places and streets that feel like Deja Vu or you feel an ominous connection to, you may dream of such locations. Lastly, when things start working out for you don't treat it as a warning sign. The dawn had to come eitherway, right?

Pisces : You might just pack your bags and leave. Whether this is metaphorical or literal or both will be personal to you. You may be making or listening to music a lot, finding harmony for yourself because you realize it needs to come from within before the outside world follows. You'll be feeling more confident in your body, in your style, decisions and pursuits. You'll resort to more creative ways to express yourself, those who get you will get you even if they are few in number. You may give romance a chance but you'll romance yourself first before you let anyone's in. There are people who genuinely admire and look out for you, look out for them too.

[thesirensoracle]

Weekly Tarot!  Jan 30 - Feb 05, 2023

Card of the Week: The World and 2 of Cups ✧☾゜・。

This week’s theme is beautiful symbiosis.

⋆𓆩✧𓆪⋆ No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dream that you wish will come true. ⋆𓆩✧𓆪⋆

After days of hard work and heartache, we may come home tired with not much hope of our future getting better. We may sometimes look at the moon and the bright stars and, after making an honest wish, feel silly for dreaming the same way we did when we were kids. Well, I’ve come as a messenger of good news, for the shining sky has heard your silent wishes and is now delivering them sweetly along with a kiss in the forehead.

The World and the 2 of Cups describing this weeks energy tells us that ahead of us is a time of happiness, success and pleasure. While not necessarily calm, this are the cards that herald the attainment of our goals, bringing triumph at your doorstep… if you’re willing to answer the door. It is said that the reason a siren’s song was so deadly was because it described perfectly what your heart most desired, so the question of this week is: what would that song sound to you? And if you got to finally hear it, would you follow its sweet lullaby or let the opportunity pass you by?

This week we are being asked to go with the flow, to allow ourselves to drown in the sweetness of the endless possibilities that lie ahead of us and trust with our whole hearts that everything is going to be alright. However, the 2 of Cups tells us that our way to success can be achieved through connections and reconciliations:

In the workplace, these cards tell us that through partnership you may achieve blossoming success. 

In love, the cards speak of a connection so strong and pure that it seemed to be paired by Venus herself. 

And if you’re just trying to focus on some inner work and healing, then the cards speak of a final reconciliation that brings lasting harmony and love where it once was filled with pain.

In whichever path you seem to be at the moment, this week we are being asked to keep dreaming and stay with high hopes at all times, for the universe is now telling us that our dreams are soon to come true. Maybe while opening the door for these blessings to come, we get to realize that all our fear and anxiety was useless, for these divine gifts were always meant to be at our side.

The week starts with moon in Krittika. The moon at the birth of the sun and the beginning of the masculine principle makes today and the rest of the week especially good for ancestral veneration, learning any type of knowledge, but above all to act aligned with our personal truth! This moon gives us the enough determination and fire to attain whatever our soul desires.

☾ Blessings: Success and happiness in any area! As long as you decide to stay positive and trust that the universe is working in your favor, blessings will appear before you nonstop.

☾ Warnings: Envy. Being successful and shining with confidence can make other people jealous, however, if you don’t pay attention to that then you’ll be fine.

☾ Random messages/tips:

The whole reading I had Aurora’s harmonization from Sleeping Beauty playing in my head, and if that doesn’t tell you how much of a good week its going to be then I don’t know what is lmao.

Don’t hold back, go all in.

Owls and a lot of imagery from the forest came to mind, maybe some of you need to ground yourselves with nature to bring more abundance into your life and take owl imagery as a sign.

222

Don’t play attention to insecurities and fear this week, they are your biggest enemies.

This week genuinely gives the energy of Aurora frolicking in the forest while she sings with her animal friends. Enjoy!

[littlestloves]

I’m honestly not sure what it is you feel for me.

You’ve said you think I’m smart, sweet, resilient, a good mom, strong, pretty, flexible, physically graceful, a good worker, one of the best people you’ve met in a long time.

I know you’re hesitating to progress things, but I also know that you’re scared of losing me. In moments I’m silent, you get uneasy. The other day when I was emotionally detaching, you could feel it, even if it wasn’t consciously. You asked me where I was going after I got off, and I told you I didn’t know. You waited for it to be 4, and as soon as you saw the time, you headed to the back to wait for me. You were pacing. I sat down while you asked again. You leaned against the chair, staring in my eyes, and I could see the fear there. You were worried about there being someone else. Maybe somehow one of the many guys that would be interested in me finally got my attention. Or maybe you came across harshly, and I was just upset with you. I could see your relief when I offered to come with you, but it wasn’t enough to strip your worry completely. Sure, I wasn’t heading to see anyone, but I was still hiding something from you. Something that changed the way I used to look at you. The openness and excitement were missing. Everything about the way you were looking at me was like pleading. “Please don’t go. Please talk to me. Please let me fix it. Please let me in.”

You almost have lost me, a few times. Because.. you haven’t made a real decision, here.

I wish I could tell you how this goes, though. There are really only two options for us, Lenny.

The first, is the one I have had visions and dreams about. We’re together, a family. We take the kids on trips in your truck, singing along to your music with the windows down. We’re having amazing sex, and life is good. We’re happy.

The second option, is you get scared, and decide not to take the chance on me. So, I do what I do best. I leave. I move to another city, and I try to move on with my life. Neither of us are doing well. You try to go back to what your life was like before me. But every time you see the stars, or the moon, you think about what sort of thing I would say about the signs and degrees they’re at. Every time you see a girl with blonde hair, you hope for a fleeting second that it’s me. But then it crushes a part of you when you realize it isn’t me, and it won’t ever be me again. You go on tinder, or you try to meet someone new. Then they ask you what your sun sign is, and the space I left behind aches again. Especially when you ask them if they can read your chart, and you go to test it. They can’t read it, though. You exit the conversation. You scroll down to our messages, and scroll up to the moments I told you what you mean to me. The pain sets in. You remember my laugh, the way I looked at you, the way I always wanted to be touching, the way I never judged you, and how easy it was to talk to me. Anger sets in. You wonder where I am. Am I okay? Am I happy without you? What if I went back to that girl you first met? The one that was scared to let anyone in, and refused the idea that anyone could genuinely love me? What if I was back to being alone, and I didn’t want the company? Or what if I was letting someone in that didn’t deserve me again? Did I really love you? Did you make a mistake? Why couldn’t you just keep me when you had the chance?

Things aren’t going well for me, either. But it’s a lot more complicated than that. I’m faced with a cross road. Because, I saw what our life together was like. So my grief strikes harder. In a lot of real ways, I die. The girl that loves you, and possibly all that is left in me that is good, dies with her. My friends don’t understand it, so I’m left to grieve you, alone. They say you’re just a guy. But I saw everything, and you aren’t just a guy to me. Whatever our souls are made of, yours and mine are the same.

This isn’t the type of loss either of us could come back from without breaking in ways that leave us more broken than we were before we met each other. And, I know that you can’t see it to the extent that I do. Your vision is blurred, and I can’t tell you what I know, because that wouldn’t be fair. It needs to be your decision. It needs to be what you want.

I think the problem here is you’re too busy trying to rationalize what we are, and how it would work logistically. You don’t fully understand what I am to you. I think that’s because you haven’t felt the way you do about me with anyone else. You have to understand something though. I’m not a girlfriend, Lenny. I’m a rib. Somewhere in this world is the man that God created me to complete and enhance. I’m not for fun. I’m not temporary. I’m worth more than uncertainty among options.

And I want you to see that. To know that. But I can’t make you. So.. you call the shots. Am I your rib? Or are we the catalysts sent to break each other one last time?

[superhero--imagines]

Part 2 Here! / Part 3 Here! / Part 4 Here! / Part 5 Here! / Part 6 Here!

A/N: not superhero themed. I just read midnight sun and had this idea and I don’t feel like making another blog so.... hope you like twilight lol

There will be a part two, and just a reminder, I’m still looking for beta readers so DM if you’re interested!

* It probably starts with you reading midnight sun, you remember reading the books/watching the movies when you were younger.

* Man, you really forgot how bad this book was. The writing itself is good, but the plot...

* It’s like everything revolves around Bella, everything is created for her.

* You almost feel bad for the other characters

* Well, whatever, you’ll finish the rest of the book tomorrow and never think about that awful franchise again.

* When you wake up you feel an ache in your head. But you didn’t drink last night, maybe you’re dehydrated

* You shift, noting the smooth silk of the covers. Now you’re alarmed.

* You don’t have silk sheets

* You see a mirror in the corner of the room, and rush over

* The face that looks back at you is different then yours

* It’s the same in some ways, but different all the same

* The curve of your nose is slightly off, your lips are thinner, eyes a little closer together.

* The memories begin to flood in, in this world you were on a graduation trip with your parents, you got an all inclusive package. Three days of sightseeing in Volterra.

* You got sick on the last day, when you were signed for a tour of the castle, your parents went without you

* That was the last you saw of them

* You dumbly followed, asking question where you shouldn’t. And ended up at the volturi’s door

* Aro had grasped your hand to see how much you knew, only too see nothing. Likewise Jane’s powers did not work as well

* They were astounded by this, it appears this was several years before Bella was introduced to the story

* And so, you became a prisoner of the tower

* Your soul must have been in this body for quite some time, but you’ve only remembered now, that’s the only explanation for why their powers didn’t work on you. Your consciousness is not of this world.

* There’s a short knock on your door

* “Are you decent?”

* You call back and Alec pops his head in.

* “Ready to go to the library?”

* He looks so kind. The boyish grin that stretched across his face as you shook your head.

* It was in direct contrast to the sadistic personality you had become accustomed to in the books

* “I need a few more minutes”

* You half expect him to lash out at you for being slow. By he only nods, closing the door and waiting outside for you to finish.

* He was you friend. You realized

* He IS your friend

* You think back as you turn on the faucet. He didn’t like you at first, being assigned to guard a human was insulting

* But he started to warm up to you once he heard you play the piano

* This body was quite used to the ivory keys. And so you charmed him as best you could, half for your survival, because the happier you kept him the less likely he was to kill you.

* And half because- you were so lonely, the Loneliness echoed in this body like an ache. Suddenly an orphan, in a continent where you knew no one. All you had was this boy.

* How long have you been here? You kept a talley at one point, but abandoned it after the thirtieth day. What was the point? You would either die or become one of them

* A shiver erupts through at the thought, in your past life you were a vegetarian, you didn’t relish in the idea of killing something alive and moving.

* You pull on a sweatshirt, ripping of the chanel tag. They bought you the nicest things money could buy, the most lavish food you could have.

* They did the same thing with the tourists they lured, keeping them happy and well fed, the same way the cows that became wagyu beef might be cared for. That way when it came time to slaughter, the meal was that much more delicious.

* You suspected this was similar, that should you be an unnecessary addition, you would make a meal suitable for their palette

* Alec basically talks your ear off the entire way to the Volturi library, mostly about literature

* “What are your thoughts on Anna Kerenina?”

* “That the patriarchy needs to be burned to the ground.”

* “That is.... valid”

* He even talks when you’re at the library, much to the annoyance of a few of the other patrons

* “Which book are you looking for now?”

* You stop mid motion on the ladder and turn to look at him. His ruby eyes glowing, he looks bloated. Like he’s fed too much.

* “Alec, why are we friends?”

* You really should keep your mouth shut. Alec was the only real ally you had, you shouldn’t say anything that might put him off

* And yet, it unnerved you, because the Alec in front of you was a very different character then the one you had come to see.

* He looks at you like you hung the moon,

* “Because you’re the most interesting human in the world”

* You burst out laughing, earning several glares.

* “I-I’m sorry Alec, but I’m not, I’m just the most interesting human you KNOW, there’s way more people who are more interesting than me.”

* You expect to see him offended, and he does, but there’s a twinkle in his eyes

* “I’m not so sure about that”

* The days creep by, reading books, eating snacks, it’s nice

* You learn, that Alec hasn’t talked to a human in a very long time. Outside of the screams he heard after devouring one.

* He hasn’t been outside the castle walls in many years, possibly a century.

* “What’s the best part of the human world?” He asked you once

* It’s the 90’s, so smartphones haven’t been invented yet.

* “One tree hill and friends”

* “Well you have a friend right here”

* “No friends the show”

* “The what?”

* And that’s how you got Alec hooked onto cable television

* Who knew the cure to vampire- sadism was a healthy dose of Jennifer Aniston fumbling about on screen

* “Is this what life is like?”

* You shrug, it was what college had been like for you in your past life.

* “It’s kinda what schools like, but i never got to be on my own”

* This body was only 18 after all.

* Alec doesn’t say anything, but his expression falters

* Alec’s only now starting to understand the life you will be denied once Aro decides when to turn you

* Jane joins later

* One day when you and Alec are lazing around the library when she appears, she says nothing, just sits down next to Alec and reads a book

* You’re sure they hear the uneven thumping of your heart as you turn back to your book. Her power doesn’t work on you, you remind yourself

* Not that she even needs it, she could snap you apart like a Kit Kat bar

* And if it came down to it, you’re sure Alec would let her, he might like you but his loyalty’s always remained with his sister

* “So... you watch human television together?” Her bright red eyes flickered from Alec to you.

* You nodded, never sure what exactly it was that would set Jane off

* You had seen enough in the books to know her moods were compatible at best.

* “I would...like to join” she awkwardly looking away, and you were sure if she could, she would be blushing.

* Honestly it’s kind of cute.

* “Sure, the more the merrier”

* And that’s how you basically adopted the sadist twins

* It’s a little harder to get Jane to open up, but once you make a comment about how Phoebe was the best character in friends, she starts to open up

* “Humans are cruel, even when they’re kind it’s only because they want something from you.”

* “Is that what you think about me? That I’m only nice to you because I want something?” she meets your eyes for a few minutes before turning away

* “I’m not sure”

* You understand very gradually why they’re so twisted

* They’d been treated terribly during their human life, in every kind act lingered a dark shadow, in even minor misunderstanding the image of a monster

* Their centuries in the Volturi didn’t help. Under Aro’s ruthless tutelage, and Caius’s sadistic tendencies, They had no one they could trust but each other.

* They were only surviving just as you were

* “Sometimes I wonder how much of my loyalty is real, and how much of it is Chelsea.” She whispers one day, so quietly you barley hear it

* You rest your hand on hers, it’s the only comfort you could think to offer

* When Jane grasps your hand in hers, she breaks every bone in your hand

* She doesn’t understand the pained screams or your mangled hand fit a second, and then she realizes what she did

* Alarmed she carries you halfway around the castle screeching for someone to help

* You pass out from the pain, when you come to you’re in your bed, a very cold hand holding your own

* “How are you feeling?” You don’t recognize this vampire, but you don’t really know anyone outside of Alec and Jane.

* You feel light headed, a warm feeling washing over you, you must be on some strong drugs

* “My body’s still grieving, but my mind is sharp.”

* It’s incoherent at best, but there’s truth to it, your body is still grieving for your parents and the life you’ve lost, but your otherworldly mind is ten steps ahead, cross referencing every action.

* The man offers a short chuckle

* “You really did a number on your hand. I’ve done what I can but...”

* You look down to your hand, half surprised by the bright yellow cast encasing it

* You had figured you would wake up to be a vampire, it just made sense, these were unfamiliar human aches to them after all and vampirism was a simple and effective cure

* They must want something from you, if they’re keeping you human

* You suspect it’s something along the lines of how they waited until Jane and Alec were burning at the stake to save them, so their power would be that much more potent

* Maybe they’re doing the opposite with you, trying to make you as happy as possible to see what effect it has on your ability

* It’s too bad you don’t have one

* “Thank you for your hard work.” You mumble, being human for a little bit longer is well worth the pain.

* “How did you break your hand?”

* “I held Janes’ hand”

* Your doctor let’s out a short laugh

* “That sounds about right”

* You smile, it does sound right, of course you would break your hand that way

* The conversation flows naturally after that, you talk about all sorts of things

* “You think vampires have souls?” He quirks an eyebrow

* “I’m of the opinion that a soul is something you create through hardship and struggle, being able to live longer means that you have more opportunities to have the experiences that result in a soul”

* “That’s an intriguing notion, I wish I had brought my son with me.”

* You’re about to ask about his son, when you’re interrupted by the door swimming open

* “I heard you were awake, are you alright?” Alec rushes in, his eyes frantic

* “Yeah these drugs are top notch” you press the button that releases the pain killers and let out a giggle

* “Is that alright? Humans are awfully sensitive.” Jane pipes up from behind Alec, you hadn’t noticed her in your haze.

* Your doctor chuckles

* “I’m aware,” he’s smiling but it’s strained

* “What’s wrong?” You ask, he was so calm until a second ago, he doesn’t answer you

* “I’ll give you three a moment.”

* You only register he’s gone when you hear the door close

* The twins rush over to you, Jane is kneeled by your side, while Alec hovers over you

* “I-I’m sorry I hurt you, I forgot-I didn’t remember.” You we’re sure Jane would be crying if she could

* “It’s okay, I know you didn’t mean it.” You raise your cast encased hand and give her a gentle pat on the head. “From now on, physical signs of affection will just be one sided.” You joke, which makes Jane grin

* “I’ll practice with some animals before I try touching you again”

* The three of you chat for a bit, they’re both surprised by your cast and ask several questions about its “primary function”

* “I didn’t know there was a doctor here” you murmur, feeling drowsy

* “Carlisle’s not with the Volturi, he’s from another coven in the new world.”

* Your drowsiness flies away in a second

* “That was Carlisle?”

* Jane looks somewhat confused but nods.

* A flutter of hope erupts in your chest, it’s so strong even your grief stricken body feels it

* You might have a chance. It’s slim, Carlisle has a family he loves and needs to protect. But still, they were strangers once too. No different than you.

* It’s a way out of here

* The next few days follow in a drugged haze, Alec and Jane visit every so often, and Carlisle engages you in occasional conversation while checking progress on your hand

* “Why are your eyes gold?” You know, but well, you need him to believe the lie

* “It’s a bit of a long story” he says with a wary smile.

* “I’m not going anywhere”

* He sighs, a genuine smile encompassing his face as he recounts the tale.

* Even though you’ve already heard it all before, it still makes you cry

* Even in the haze, you know something’s.... off

* There’s something about the way Alec won’t meet your eyes when he talks to you, and the uneasy weight that lingers in the air whenever someone else is in the room

* On the third day, it’s Aro who visits you, Alec and Carlisle in tow behind him.

* “Oh my, all that internal bleeding, how awful”

* Even you can feel the insincerity, but it’s the first you heard about internal bleeding

* So that explains it, the drugs and the aches all along your body, it wasn’t just your hand, you were dying

* “Don’t worry, we’ll save you” Aro’s smile is cruel “won’t we Alec?”

* Alec looks afraid, almost pained, but he nods

* Ah, so this was punishment for Alec too. Until that moment, when Jane broke your hand, Aro must have been ignorant to how close the three of you had gotten.

* You close your eyes, you knew this would happen eventually. There were only two ending to this story, and it seemed one had finally been picked

* You feel a pinch on your neck, right above your collar bone, no worse than a flue shot.

* You wait for the pain, the vivid screams you remember from the books and movies, but it never comes.

* Instead it’s just a warm numbness that spreads across your neck and left shoulder.

* “It doesn’t hurt” you murmur, you feel a cold hand rest against your forehead, Alex’s hand.

* It’s so gentle, he must have practiced on some animals first, you think.

* “No the pain comes later.”

* And so you drift into inky black unconsciousness, the last sleep of your human life in this world.

* You dream that you’re sitting at the bottom of a tree, a fig tree, like the one Sylvia Plath wrote about

* Each fig a different path, half of them have already fallen off, dark, as they rot at your feet

* “How do you do it?”

* You look to your side and find the person who’s face you see in the mirror, they’re hugging their knees to their chest, dark circles under their eyes

* “How do I do what?” You ask, they bite their lip

* “How can you be so strong when you’ve just lost everything?”

* You see their eyes brim with tears, and you look away, to the tree that looks over you both

* “I don’t know” It’s the truth, you have an unfair advantage in this world, because you know all the secrets each person carries, while yours remain shrouded in darkness. And yet... it’s not why you persevere

* “All I do know, is that I want to give them hell”

* Your counterpart grins at that, and to your surprise, you feel a smile stretch out across your face

* Yeah, it’s not about power, you just want raise some hell in this backwards misogynistic world.

* “I guess that’s the one you’re picking then huh?” Your counterpart points to a fig, it’s on the tallest branch of the tree, so far out of reach it almost seems unobtainable

* But you only nod

* “Yeah, I think that’s the way I’m going to go”

* They look at you and smile.

* “If you ever get the chance, I hope you punch that jerk Aro right in the face”

* You laugh.

* When you finally awake, you’re still laughing. A smile etched onto your face.

* Everyone’s there, all looking at you with concerned glances.

* Yeah, you’re going to have a lot of fun in this world.

[beewritings]

Break up texts with AOT characters

(Eren, Armin, Jean, Connie, Reiner, Zeke & Porco)

AFAB reader

Content Warning: angst, fluff & some nsfw. Mentions of ddlg (?), semi public sex, I think that’s all. :)

Yes, all the times are the times I worked on them. I don’t sleep lmao. There are typos I see them in just unbothered to fix them

Eren

You drive over to Eren’s place about ten minutes later. You already cried and did your little heartbreak grieving before leaving. To be fair , you just wanted to have sex with him one more time. Unless he gets into a new relationship, you wouldn’t mind being his friends with benefits, but considering the fact you’re in love with him... it’s a hard no. You get there after fifteen minutes of driving, you have a spare key which you will be returning so you just walk in. You see him sitting on the couch of his apartment, leaning forward with his legs spread and his head in his hands. He looks up and sees you. You walk to him and sit on the couch in front of him.

“Hey...”

“Hey.”

The awkward silence was so uncomfortable, you honestly didn’t want him to say the words to you again. You just wanted to see him, to have him. One more time before you avoid him forever.

Armin

You feel bad that you broke up with Armin through text, but you didn’t have the guts to tell him in person. But since he was so calm about it, you decided to go and visit him a few hours later. When you get to his dorm which was just across from your dorm building, you do your knock so he knows it’s you. He rushes to the door and greets you with a smile and asks why you’re there. You tell him how you felt bad that you broke up with him by text and wanted to check on him.

“Y/n, I’m fine! It was only 4 months, it takes longer than that for me to fall in love. I saw us as baby couple, just trying it out until it gets serious. I’m not angry, I’m not upset. Don’t worry, y/n. And the way we can still be friends? It makes me happier!”

Let’s just say that a few days later, you crawled right back to him asking him for you back. Eren told him it’s because his dick game strong, and even though Armin knows his game is strong, he knows that you just have a kind heart and that’s why you’ve been attracted to him. Now it’s been over a year and you have a promise ring on your finger :)

Jean

You and Jean are literally in the same apartment. You LIVE with him. You’re in the bathroom and he was cooking food. He texts you telling you to get off the toilet and go to the kitchen so you finish your business and do what he says. You get to the kitchen to smell the beautiful food and you approach your husband.

“You’re joking right? About not feeling it between us?”

“Of course I’m joking, I’m literally married to you. Today is our 2 year anniversary. Jean, did you get high before cooking? Did Eren sneak in here and let you smoke? Are you good?”

Jean holds your waist, giving you kisses on your forehead. He pushes you lightly against the counter next to the stove. He shoves his face into your neck, leaving those gorgeous black and blue galaxies on your neck.

“Really? Before our guests come over? You’re such a bad boy, do I have to punish you later tonight?”

“If anyone’s getting punished, it’s you for pretending to break up with me,” he lifts you up and puts you on the counter, going in between your legs. He lifts up your skirt, leavings kisses all on your thighs making his way to your core. “Now, you be a good girl and let daddy take care of you, yeah?”

Connie (yes the top text is cut off for a reason)

You googled break up texts because you wanted to mess with him, but his responses really disappointed you. Like geez prank gone stupid? When Connie gets to your place, he literally brought his switch and extra controllers and he pushes his way inside. You own the switch lite (pain) so you always ask him to bring his and connect it to the tv. He’s so focused on gaming with you that he doesn’t even pay attention the fact that you’re wearing lingerie. You don’t even want to play, you just wanted sum fuk. He finishes setting up the console and sits on the couch.

“Hey babe. Oh, nice. You look cute.”

“???? CUTE?”

“Yeah. You ready? Lets play.”

“Why am I dating you? You don’t even know how romance works.”

“Yes I do. If I win, I fuck. You win, I go down on you. Is that not how it works?”

“.... connie shut up and let’s just play.”

Reiner

You felt like the world was coming to an end. What made Reiner change his mind? You guys just made love the other night again, he took you out to eat last night, why today? Oh no... was he spoiling you to prepare you for heartbreak? Reiner doesn’t seem like that though.... why is he so poetic yet such an ass? It’s around 9 pm when he stops by with your belongings. You try to give him his goodies but he tells you to keep it. He allows you to cry in his arms, to kiss him one last time. And the whole time this happens, this man gets a raging fucking hard on. You know he had a thing for pain and degradation, but this is real life. Is he really getting turned on by a break up? But... it gives you a chance to have one last sex before he never comes back. Because god that man has a monster dong.

“Reiner.. whats with the hard on?”

He blushes, moving a hand to cover his crotch area. Unfortunately, your hand grips his cock this his pants before he does. He buckled his knees and legs out a strangled moan, just for you.

“Y/n, d-don’t do this..”

“Oh? Who’s the one who got a hard on from breaking up with me? Huh?”

Before you can do anything else, he pushes you off him, your ass landing on the bed. You were expecting one thing, but not what he does.

“Stop! Listen, I got to go. I hope you live a happy life... I love you...”

He walks towards your apartment door, swings it open and steps out.

“Take care.”

Zeke

After Zeke had texted you that, of course you cried. You didn’t know how to take it... he’s in his thirties and you’re only in college. Hell, you have class with his younger brother. But have fun? Go to parties and fuck other men? Like if you’re a cuck, just say it. If he REALLY wants you to party and sleep with other people, they could’ve just stayed in a relationship but make it open. He could’ve added some people to the sequence... you’ve always wanted a threesome, especially with a girl so you don’t understand why he’d just leave you. But you don’t even like parties or clubs. You love him, you want to be settled down. You wanted him. If he found another woman... he would’ve said that right? Or is he manipulative like you heard his brother was? Everyone knows about Eren, he’s a whore. Does it run in the family? No... he only broke up with you today. Just wait a bit before assuming.

A month passes, you went to one (1) party at a club with your dorm roommate, Hitch, and you had a terrible time. You saw one man drop something in your drink (which you proceeded to toss on his face), two others tried sandwiching you on the dance floor (which he elbowed them both in the face), and some other guy literally touched your thigh while trying to speak to you at the bar. You had enough. You socked him in the face, and went towards the bathroom area. You see a familiar face with an unfamiliar woman.

Zeke...

He had a woman with long black hair on his lap. No... it’s hidden but you could see it in plain sight. He had his cock stuffed inside her, under her skirt. She had this twisted face of pleasure and he wasn’t moving, nothing. She was moving her hips on his lap, pleasing him. She looks around and makes eye contact with you. She recognizes you as Zeke’s ex, and rides him quicker.

You look away, angrily and upset, you throw the cup you were babysitting on the floor in front of you, shattering it. People around who heard it look, including Zeke. He turn your head to look him dead in the eye with your look of disgust, and turn around to leave.

That was the last time you saw him or came in contact with him.

Porco

You sigh. You always were there for him on his shitty days. You feel bad leaving him stranded. So you ended up going over. You think it’s a bad idea and it probably is, but you’ll suffer the consequences if so. You drive to his apartment and walk in with the spare key you had. You don’t see him so you assume he’s in his room. You hear a faint sound, almost like a moan. You take a huge sigh. If he’s jerking off, you’re leaving. You walk in, opening his door and you see his back his facing you. He turns around and... he’s crying. Porco isn’t much of a crier so this really shocked you. You run to him, sitting next to him and hold his face.

“Pock, my baby...”

“Y/n, don’t leave me. Please... I know I’m a dickhead a lot and I know I’m a piece of shit. I hold so much anger in me and... I take it out in the wrong person. I’ll take anger management or something, I’ll go to a therapist. Just... please don’t leave me. You’re the reason I wake up, my sun and moon. The one I love, y/n please.. I want to build a future with you. I want to get married, have abratty little mommy’s boy with you and cute little daddy’s girl.... please.. Don’t leave me..”

Well shit. That was some convincing. After telling yourself 400 times to break up with him, he convinced you to stay this easily. After cuddling and holding him in your arms to nap, you woke up with your ass pressed against his dick. Yup, he’s hard. You can imagine what y’all did when he woke up.

You love Porco, and he was right. You wanted to build a future with him too. Maybe it’s time.

[thebigoblin]

For some reason i was listening to this is home - cavetown and came to the crushing realization that if fits sterek kinda well???? Its always been my song for comfort but the other day i was listening to it and got slapped in the face by sterek feels-

I just listened to it right now (x) and I have soooo maaaanyyy feeels. Goddammit, Sterek. Let me have one hour in peace.

Anyways. So.

Often I am upset that I cannot fall in love but I guess

This avoids the stress of falling out of it

Are you tired of me yet?

This is soo Derek. He has been burned by love (both literally and figuratively), first with the death of his first love (which he had to do, even if it was a mercy killing he did kill her) and then he thought this woman loved him enough to want him as he was: broken, young, inexperienced. Grieving.

And then Kate showed him exactly what it means to love someone like him.

It always ends in death.

So now Derek doesn't fall in love. He doesn't even make friends, doesn't socialize. He doesn't let anyone enter the fortress of his solitude, not even Laura, knowing he is the reason they've lost their pack. He doesn't deserve that kind of love.

He waits for Laura to tire of him. To be frustrated and angry at him, to tell him he means nothing to her anymore, because even though he hasn't told her he knows why the fire happened—knows who did it—he is been nothing but a thorn in her side, anything but helpful in her endeavor to help rebuild their lives.

He waits and waits for Laura to tire of him, to kick him out of the two person pack—and she does. But not the way he wanted.

She dies and leaves him alone and there is no one to nag at him to get his shit together, to make him see that he can be loved, should be; but it's not at all what he wanted.

I'll hide my chest

And I'll figure out a way to get us out of here

This can be both Derek and Stiles... but I see it more for Stiles. Idk why.

Derek plays his cards close to his chest, but he does all he can to try and protect the others. We don't really see him be anything but angry in the earlier parts of the show, and you can't make me believe that the person who gave up his Alpha powers for his sister, who trusted Peter (when he was the Alpha) despite the things he'd done simply because he's family, won't be grieving for the only family he thought he had.

And then there's Stiles. Stiles '147 pounds of pale skin and fragile bones. Sarcasm is my only defense' Stilinski who is human and logically the weakest person in a show of mythical creatures. And he is. He is weak. Physically, he knows he can't take on Peter or the Kanima or the Alpha Pack. And he is terrified of that. But you know what he does? He fights in spite of that. He talks, he plans, he misguides, and he fights. He fights because he won't let anyone hurt him or the ones he wants to keep safe.

Stiles, too, 'hides' his true feelings and figures out a way to get them out of their problems. (Does that make sense??)

Are you dead? Sometimes I think I'm dead

'Cause I can feel ghosts and ghouls wrapping my head

But I don't wanna fall asleep just yet

This one is kinda self-explanatory isn't it... Derek is haunted by his past and it's made him into a person who can and is willing to sacrifice his own life without a second thought.

'I know what I'm risking. My life for theirs.'

He doesn't exactly have anything to live for. But he's brave. He's going through hell and he keeps going.

He doesn't want to sleep. Not yet.

Get a load of this monster

He doesn't know how to communicate

His mind is in a different place

Will everybody please give him a little bit of space

Get a load of this train-wreck

His hair's a mess and he doesn't know who he is yet

The first two lines... these are also self-explanatory. I see this as things Stiles thinks (not the monster part, not once he's rationalized that mythical creatures exist in the world) about Derek. (Honesty, I think we all think that lol).

Derek is not good at communication. He wants something but he does something else. He wanted Isaac to leave him so that The Alpha Pack can't leverage his third beta against him, hurt him/kill him like Erica (and Boyd, but I don't remember if he was alive during this time or not), but the way he made Isaac leave was to bank on Isaac's trauma—if I am remembering correctly, this is when he throws the glass at Isaac.

Derek is so not good at communication. And he is definitely a train-wreck; he never wanted to be the Alpha and he still becomes one. He never wanted for Laura to come back to BH (probably why he himself didn't come back here while she did) but she did anyways and he lost her. He didn't want to kill Peter, but he had to anyway.

He lost who he was in the chaos of his life. And he doesn't know who he is anymore—he isn't even the Alpha anymore, he's lost that, and he's been human too.

He keeps losing who he is. He keeps losing his identity.

Derek Hale doesn't know who he is supposed to be.

But maybe...

But little do we know, the stars

Welcome him with open arms

...This is how it was supposed to be.

Maybe this was all fate. All of it, from the loss of Paige to his evolution, maybe it was all mapped out in the stars. Maybe it was supposed to happen.

Just so he could find who he is.

And who he is? He's the best legacy his family could have asked for. He's a predator, and he's a killer, but he's not a cold-blooded killer. He's strong, he's brave, and he is good. He's someone who has had the worst life but come out of it a brighter person, a burning sun; a moon that shines brighter the more that it wanes, because Derek? He's learned to hide his craters, and he's learned to live with them.

Alternatively, though, 'the stars' could also mean Stiles (his moles, scattered along his skin like constellations), the only one who opened his arms for Derek even when he didn't have to. Like saving his life even when they weren't anything to each other.

Time is slowly

Tracing his face

But strangely he feels at home in this place

Time heals wounds, doesn't it?

Derek gets better with time. He doesn't just live, but he's alive. He is living.

Since I've gone full canon up until now, I'll continue post-canon here: Stiles and Derek, we know how their story goes up till S6B. We know how much Stiles means to Derek and Derek to Stiles, even if it wasn't strictly said aloud in canon.

We know.

And I... well. I think that Stiles and Derek say it aloud. To each other. How much they matter to each other.

It might be during one of those high-tension missions, the pack preparing to fight against Monroe, making plans and doing everything they can. Stiles is planning, laying out rules and objectives and making sure to drill into one of them how important this is, and Derek watches him and he watches Lydia, the girl who has Stiles' heart. (Only she doesn't, and she knows it).

And then Stiles says he will come, too. But it's too dangerous.

Derek immediately objects.

Everyone goes deathly silent. Because Stiles is the one who is 100% capable of them all, who is the best on their side (being FBI does that, as does being part of ops like this since he was 16, even if Stiles wasn't as badass as he is now).

Stiles is angry.

"So, what, you wanna be the martyr, then? Is that what you want?"

Derek is angrier. (He is terrified).

"You'll get hurt!"

"I will not! Even if I do, it's my fucking job—I'll get hurt if it means keeping you all safe!"

"You can die!"

"So I will die!"

"No, Stiles, you will not. I—"

"What do you mean I will not—"

"—can't lose you too!"

Yes, this is total cliché, but I am a total simp for cliché so :D

And yeah, after? When they've defeated Monroe and are back to 'normal,' Derek and Stiles fill the parts of each other that they've lost over the years. They make a home for themselves. In each other, with each other.

(And okayyyyy, wow. I did not mean to get so into this but... here we are. I totally obsessed over this lol).

(Also this is a beautiful song, if a bit sad? Anyways, now I have a new song to listen to so thanks <3)

[katsukikitten]

A/N look if you didnt even tear up. All I'm saying is I didnt do my job right.

Part 1 ××× Part 2 ×× Part 3

Bakugou sits at the long table in the dining room in his usual spot, Mei and Haru nod his way as others begin to file in. 

The children look a tad older than usual as they sit a bit straighter this year, Uncle Sozen seems to have aged over night as he sits to Bakugou's left. He offers a wide smile to which Bakugou returns.

"DADDY!! DADDY!" A shrill voice rings out, little feet slapping harshly against the hard wood as a little girl slams down into his lap. Ash blonde hair dutifully braided but coming loose from all of the horse play skillfully climbs onto his legs. 

She looks up at him with wide eyes that mirror your eye color. His heart melts as he smooths down some of her hair. 

"Where's your brother?" He asks softly before a young boy comes rushing in. Feet falling hard enough to shake the dishes at the table. Your hair and his burning ember eyes greet him with a shit eating grin. 

Neither could be older than six or seven. 

"Told you I'd find you!" He brings up a bright palm to slap his older sister only for his wrist to be grabbed by you.  Leveling him with a glare the child shrinks away. Trying to hide behind both his sister and father. Bakugou looks up at you, your fierce gaze, your glowing features and swollen belly. His heart melts, pooling in his stomach and threatening to dip lower still. He swallows thickly adding his own sharp voice to the mix. 

"Sit and behave." The children cling to Uncle Sozen or Aunt Mai. Climbing into their laps eager to be spoiled once more. Summer crickets echo into the dining hall before they are drowned out by both the thunder of the approaching summer storm and the roar of the dining table. 

Dinner goes on without a hitch. Happy conversation as Sobo takes it all in. She sits stick straight, her once silver hair long since turned moon white and adorned in her normal plain kimono. When dinner is over, everyone begins to clear the table, excited for tomorrow's birthday and celebration that is bound to take place. Bakugou goes to what has become his normal duty, standing by Sobo to help her up and back to her study. He knows she wants to see the moon flowers bloom. 

He is gentle with her now fragile stature, never able to forget how easily she wielded an old weapon on his first dinner at this estate. The thought makes him smile as they enter her study. He settles her onto her cushion, about to leave to finish clearing the table. But she doesn't let go so Bakugou sinks into the cushion beside her, the summer storm faded as quickly as it came and as the clouds clear  the closed tight buds slowly begin to unravel, mirrored moonlight nestled on delicate petals. Silence envelops the two as they stare at the beautiful metaphor that is the moon flower. Her grip tightens on his strong bicep.

"Thank you for humoring this old woman." Sobo breaks the silence causing scarlet eyes to slide to his elder. 

Except she no longer looks old, instead she looks young. As she did in the picture with All Might. Hair as dark as night and adorned in her crane kimono. Bakugou swallows thickly. 

"I'm glad you've made up your mind, mago."She smiles, squeezing tighter and somehow this feels more like a good bye than anything else. 

He doesn't like the feeling, he goes to open his mouth to ask what she means but lightning suddenly strikes outside. 

The thunder comes as the sound of the sliding door to your room. Bakugou lifts a palm glowing hot as an ember aimed at the figure who dared to enter in the early hours of the morning. 

Mei stands in the doorway disheveled as you slowly rise, you hold eye contact with Mei's watery eyes and just…know. 

You jump to your feet, throwing off the blanket as you rummage in your bag for any sort of clothing. Mismatched as you shove your body in the fabric as you head for the door. Sprinting down the hall as if called on a mission. Bakugou rises, noticing Mei's tear stained cheeks, questions are plastered all over his tired features. 

"Its...Sobo…" A hiccup leaves Mei's frame reminding Bakugou just how small and young she was, "She's...she's." 

"I'm glad you made up your mind, mago." 

It clicks as her voice echoes in his head from the dream, soles of his feet burning as he runs aimlessly through the estate until he finally finds where people are gathered. 

There was not a single dry eye as he huffs. 

"Where's…" He asks but Aunt Mai just points, clinging to Uncle Sozen who seems to be frozen in time. Bakugou slowly walks towards you as you sit with wide eyes. Clasping onto Sobo's cool hands. 

When he sinks down next to you is when he realizes that you're shaking. 

He fights his gut, to reach out for you, to pull him to you so you can cry to your heart's content but instead you look to great Oba. 

"I'll help sort her things. Please allow me a shower first." You say monotone, eyes glazed over and Bakugou isn't sure which would be worse. You unfeeling and cold or you crying until you were sick. 

Either way his heart was sure to split in two. Your eyes come back to Sobo. You lean in close, pressing a soft kiss to her fast cooling cheek. 

"I'm sorry we lied. Bakugou is barely my roommate Sobo." You whisper so lowly that even Katuski strains to hear you. 

You rise, trying to walk calmly out of the room. Telling yourself over and over that this was just a mission or worse yet just a nightmare and to allow yourself to feel an ounce of fear or grief would be your downfall. 

"Its all Uncle Shoji's fault! If he hadn't come and riled Sobo up or hadn't made that damned drug Sozen would have felt her vitals weaken." Haru yells, tears falling in fat droplets as he slides a forearm over his face.  You snap then, yelling as you reach for the first thing you can grab, a book that you hurl at your cousin as you scream. 

"SHE HAD AN ARRYTHMIA! WE CAN'T BLAME SHOJI FOR ALL OF OUR FAMILY'S FUCK UPS." 

The book hits Haku square in his face, a letter flutters from the yellowed pages before it slams onto the ground. 

All eyes watch the letter that's addressed in big bold letters. 

To my family. 

Eagerly you swoop for the letter, snatching onto the parchment and last tangible thing from your grandmother. You rise to your feet, eyes frantic as you look around the room. 

Bakugou knows that face, you're about to make a bad decision and before he can stop you you've set a harsh pace to follow. 

He rises and gives chase as does half of the younger generation. But none of them can keep up. 

No one but Bakugou, which you had expected. 

It would be more than easy enough to lose him in this house. 

Or maybe it wouldn't be so easy. With each turn he comes closer but you can't be caught yet. 

Whatever it is your grandmother has to say you know you have to read it first, but most importantly, alone. 

You want the chance to say goodbye and to grieve in private. 

You plan to lose him in the secret room in your grandmother's study rushing into it with just enough time to disappear. 

But suddenly you cannot, too overwhelmed by the sight of her favorite little room, decorated with all of her accomplishments but more importantly her family. Memories over lapping one another as you stand frozen. Bakugou bursts into the room, skin popping with heated explosions as he grabs for you. Grip gentle on your wrist. 

"We should go back." His voice is feather soft, as if he's scared you'll break and it makes you angry. 

It makes you sad. 

Because he's right, you will break. Now there was no one to look forward to seeing in your favorite season, no one to celebrate summer with. 

No one to lose horribly at Go to, no one to teach you the art of a deal and no one to explain the beauty in the world no matter how small and insignificant it seemed. 

Fat tears fall down your face as you cry like you never have before. Like you hadn't since you were a child. A small whine comes from your throat that has Bakugou's heart imploding, his brows furrowed as he reaches for your other wrist. Trying so hard to support you without making you feel weak. You push yourself into him, clutching at his shirt as his burning sugar and firework smell tingles your nose, summer incarnate.  He wraps his arms around you tightly, pushing you closer to him in an attempt to hold you together as best he can as you fall apart in his arms. 

"What are we gon..gonna do Katsuki?" You sob, shoving your face deeper into his chest, "H..How are we gon..gonna live without Sobo?" 

Bakugou's eyes sting from your defeat, staring out into the background as he thinks of anything he can say or do to help you, all he draws is a blank. He was the worst at shit like this! 

Movement catches his eye, a crane flies across the sky, his eyes fall to that damn plant noticing one final bloom persisting through the harsh morning sun.

"We aren't." He says, thinking of his dream, "She's always with us." 

His words bring you comfort, resolve forcing your back stick straight as you look him in the face. That odd magnetism between the two of you returns. Licking your lips you do the unthinkable, following your gut as you stand on your tippy toes to softly press your lips to his. 

"Thank you." A whisper, before stepping past him to face your family head on. 

The ash blonde stands in the study for a moment, reliving the feeling of your lips against his. Of the electricity that surged through his body harder than any shot Denki had ever taken at him before. 

The tips of his fingers brush over his lips, the bloom finally closing and he feels as if he sees a smile. 

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

He returns just in time to see the family all gathered around, you having finally settled the bunch. Breaking the wax seal of the letter. Eyes rimmed red, the ink blurring beneath your gaze but you needed to be okay, you needed to be strong. Someone was meant to read the letter outloud and today that someone was you. 

“To my loving family, if you’ve found this letter then I know what you all are going through. But I do not want you to shed tears over this little old woman. I have lived a long and wonderful life. Blessed with each of my children, and their children’s children. I want you all to celebrate my life and more importantly celebrate our family. As this is all we have and should treasure above all else. Life is hard enough as it is on our own so we must not forget where we come from and who truly supports our love and our dreams.  Surely there is no pain worse than hunger and loneliness, so eat with each other often to ease your troubles. One day Shoji will come back into our lives and I may not be around when that happens but when he does please welcome him back with open arms as we all can lose our way from time to time.  Let him join you all at the dinner table and help him to remember what family, what our family, is all about. Make sure that he eats  as I am sure he will be hungry and I know he will be lonely. Help him ease his pains, help guide him back onto the right path in life. I end this letter to remind you all how much I care and love for each and every one of you. Good things will come as does the crane that flies over the bloomed lotus. 

With all of my love, forever and for always I give to you,

Sobo.” 

Silence settles over the large estate with nothing more than sniffles and sobs echoing down the hall. Bakugou places his hand on your back, surprisingly having a hard time keeping his own eyes from watering. 

In such a short time he had made a friend, he made family. 

His skin burns through your shirt as tears fall from your cheeks, like a movie star. Eyes clouded, nose a bit red but eyes set hard. 

"Sobo was right. Family is all we have and we can all become misguided. I…." You look to the blonde, squaring your shoulders, "I lied. Bakugou is not my fiance. He isn't even my boyfriend. I lied for Sobo, thinking that this would make her happy. But now…now we must make things right." 

You pull an outdated iPhone from your pocket. 

"I found it after Shoji left. Maybe we can contact him and when he comes back…" Your voice is hard and yet threatening to crack all at once. Eyes roaming over your large family. 

"We will eat." Great Oba says, "Ladies, if you would prepare the food for celebration.  I will retire to her study and call friends and family. We will lay Sobo to rest when the sun sleeps and the moon rises." 

Everyone nods, wiping tears and comforting their children as they move to their duty. You give Bakugou a sympathetic look before rushing off to call uncle Shoji. 

Bakugou suddenly finds himself a bit aimless once again before the sharp bite of a matriarch's voice rings out. 

"Bakugou, you will come with me." Great Oba turns while Katsuki follows without question. 

A certain item weight extra heavy in his pants pocket. 

×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&

"Fuck!" Shoji growls for the thousandth time, unable to pack his things and leave the near by hotel. Finally he rises forcing himself to gather various items that he has half a mind to leave. 

Fresh tears pricking his eyes as he wishes that old bag would just….would just fucking love him. He knows he's the black sheep, the unwanted baby but still. 

He still is trying to live up to the image Sobo had of him. His phone rings and he answers it with a snobbish attitude, crying long gone from his voice. 

"What do you know, Princess figured out my random passcode. I knew you were smart but why are you so damn persistent I'm not coming bac… " 

"Just shut the fuck up." You cut him off, sounding like Sobo with your harsh tone but you with your cussing. He runs his hands through his hair. 

"Sobi is gone Shoji. You need to come back. You need to say goodbye." 

"She...she what?! That old hag is immortal." 

"Watch your tongue." A startled chilll runs down his spine before you add your own flair to Sobo's best threat, "Or I will have to watch it for you by taking it for myself." 

"And before you start your bullshit pity party we want you here. We need you here. You're family. You need to eat with us. Laugh with us…" Your voice threatens to crack, "Cry with us Shoji. Find your way back home….please." 

Nothingness stretches on between the two of you before you sigh. Hoping he will prove you and everyone else wrong. That he is not a lost cause. 

"We lie her to rest tonight. Under the watch of the full moon near the lake." 

You hang up the phone, crushing it in your hand by accident as salt water streams down your face. 

×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&×&

The hot head has never found himself in so many uncomfortable and vulnerable spots during this trip than he has in his entire lifetime. 

He sits across from Great Oba-san who really only wanted him around to keep any eye on him. A war rages in himself, over the game of Go, over his dream and more so over these new blossoming feelings he has for you. 

Was this going to be worth a few bowls of spicy ramen? 

He fucking thought not. Sobo's voice echoes in his head as the small object burns a hole in his pocket. 

Better to return it now before they think him a thief. 

He withdrawals the stunning single set diamond ring that is surrounded by a ring of off tiny circular onyx. The diamond the moon suspended in the dark night of the onyx. 

A breathtaking piece truly, he sets it atop the paper work Great Oba is sorting. Her facial expression seems to change in slow motion as it adjusts to her rapidly changing emotions. 

"How did you…?" 

"I couldnt sleep and she called me in to hustle me over a game of Go. She said she knew that she...that we lied." Bakugou continues to tell her about the game and dream. All the while Oba stares with wide eyes, fixated on the ring waiting for him to finish. Her face sets hard, her eyes a mixture of emotion. 

"Bakugou, you know what you must do." As if it's a mission, a task. He thinks he must leave immediately. He goes to stand. 

"No. Sit." Controlled rage, pushing the ring back towards the young man, "You must propose now. No one has had Sobo's full blessing like this before." 

He stares at her hard, shocked even before he growls out. 

"We aren't even dating!" 

"In my time, in Sobo's time we didn't know our husbands name until we were wed." She continues to sort, filing things away avoiding taking the ring.  He sucks his teeth, dumbfounded. 

"We dont even like each other!" His forearms pop with his mouth and temper. Great Oba rolls her eyed. 

"That's debatable. I've never seen someone so quick to break down her walls before. Besides only a man would have stayed during this family crises. A boy would have left on the first night."  Bakugou mulls it over, the dream, was it just that or had he really pictured himself here. In this house. 

In this estate year after year as it ebbs and flows of faces with your family. 

Here with you? 

His heart races and slows all at once, his palms sweat as his feet tingle to move. He inhales deeply trying to collect his thoughts and calm his thoughts. 

"What if she says no?" His main worry, his only worry now being rejection. Still unsure if this is his future but it was true if given the opportunity to lay down his life to ensure yours he would do it. 

No hesitation, no doubt to keep you smiling. To ensure you become your own matriarch to protect this house and Sobo's spirit. 

"She wont say no. That ring isn't just any ring. That ring was passed down from our mother and from her mother." She swallows thickly, the thought of most her family having now passed pangs her heart but Oba must go on with big shoes to fill. 

Her elder sister a force of nature. 

Suddenly Bakugou stands, rage mixed in his scarlet eyes. 

"Then it ain't fucking right for me to have this! I can't have this!" 

"But. You. Will." Her tongue a knife. Ripping him to ribbons and all he can see is another version of you. Another strong willed woman, another force to be reckoned with. 

"Besides, I know she will not. Once she sees that ring she will know. Sobo was a great judge of character despite being quirkless. I heard my son Sozen tell the story but only partially. My sister's husband was a great man who sadly was inflicted with a disease, Alzheimer's hit him hard in his old age. And an in home nurse took advantage of that.  She looked much like s younger version it my sister, taking him to casinos and pretending to be his wife. She spent the family fortune, she thought a child would secure her wealth but she had tapped the well dry. When she realized that, she left Shoji on the front step, dirty and naked as if he were garbage." 

Bakugou slumps back onto the amethyst cushion from the weight of the story, still worry is written all along his face. Great Oba sighs. 

"At the end of the day, it is my niece's choice and if she says no at least you can say you tried. You honored Sobo's wish with an attempt and she'd be more than happy with that." Great Oba smiles and he can see a ghost of Sobo's wide, wild smile in her. 

He swallows thickly, gently grabbing the ring. He turns it over and over in his hands. 

This was crazy. 

This was stupid. 

This was crazy fucking stupid. 

But maybe his fate in love was meant to be crazy fucking stupid.

[solitvdcs]

* darren barnet, cis male + he/him  | you know andrew upston, right? they’re twenty-seven, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, five years and just reappeared after almost nine years? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to cough syrup by young the giant like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole ink-stained hands wrapped in bandages, lingering stutter hidden behind a mysterious facade, dropping the weight on your shoulders into the pacific ocean thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is november 3, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered.

trigger warning: death and vehicular accident

basic info

full name: andrew richard upston

birth date: november 3, 1994

pronouns: he/him

hometown: new york, ny

sexuality: bisexual

height: 5′11″

eye color: brown

hair color: brown

build: athletic

tattoos: “i feel infinite” across his upper back, written in his brother’s handwriting (from a note his brother wrote him once), various others but that’s the important one

piercings: none

style: varies from day to day, his style is whatever the fuck he wants

favorite color: gray

favorite food: pizza

zodiac: scorpio sun, scorpio moon, aries rising

mbti: infj

hogwarts house: gryffindor

enneagram: type 8 wing 7

temperament: choleric-phlegmatic

alignment: chaotic neutral

bio bullet points

as the oldest son of richard and helen upston, he was – of course – meant to take over the family business someday. he played the dutiful son act for most of his life, work first play later blah, blah – he played as hard as he worked, though, but he didn’t see a problem so long as he got done what he needed to beforehand

he started in karate at a young age, got kicked out because he didn’t take the sensei seriously, then enrolled in a different dojo where he did a little better. made it to brown belt level before moving to irving in eighth grade, which was the same year teardrops on my guitar came out (yes many people serenaded him, he was the cute new guy who happened to have the same name as the guy in the song)

instead of continuing with karate, he joined the local hockey league (also something he’d been playing since he was young). high school track came in the off season so he wouldn’t injure himself in a contact sport

DEATH & VEHICULAR ACCIDENT TW drew was never as close to his younger brother as he would’ve liked, but tate was still his brother no matter what. one night, tate snuck out in one of their dad’s luxury cars with his best friends in the passenger seat. the road was slick from a thin layer of freshly snow, the car slid off the road and wrapped around a light pole. drew was away at a hockey game, and tate was gone before he arrived. he stayed by the bedside of tate’s best friend that night until she woke up END TW

drew graduated a couple months later, went to a nearby university (and therapist), and studied sociology — a throwaway major, really, since he just needed the degree to take over the company. his fate was sealed, and he didn’t need to overthink it 

towards the end of his freshman year, he overheard his dad on the phone when he was walking by the office in their home. long story short, he discovered his dad was embezzling the company he worked for – his mother’s family’s company and the company drew was meant to take over – and drew knew it was only a matter of time before his dad was discovered, because – well, his dad wasn’t exactly the brightest crayon in the box

he made the ultimate decision to drop out and try to make a living on his own so he wouldn’t get caught up in his father’s crimes. the problem was……..drew didn’t have any marketable skills. again, sociology had been a throwaway major just so he could get the slip of paper, and the only thing it helped was his ability to read people and situations

DEATH TW 2 still grieving over his brother’s death, he started channeling his grief like his therapist had told him countless times before. out on his own on the other side of the country, drew’s risk-taking behavior and overall adrenaline junky-ness led him to work as a stuntman in los angeles, and though it was fun and paid the bills for the most part, he was used to a much better lifestyle END TW

he’d fallen into the underground fighting ring back in school and found his way again in los angeles, and it was a much more lucrative business than stunts. he took up karate again and earned his second degree black belt while out in la. and during his off time – he started writing a book. 

drew had never been the best talker. he always spoke before he thought through his words and usually ended up saying the wrong thing. writing forced him to think about what he was saying, though, and he was actually pretty good at it

he published his book – a coming of age story featuring a boy with more than a few similarities to tate, and maybe a few others he had strong connections with along the way– under a pseudonym, because if the book did well, he wanted it to be his money and not get caught up in his family’s affairs. and if it did poorly, well, nobody would be the wiser

it did really well, though. topped all the bestseller lists, even without him doing a book tour to protect his identity. the only people who know he wrote rapidfire are his agent and therapist

now that he’s financially independent, he’s cut himself off from his family completely (was originally going to help his mother out, until he found out she was the brains behind the operation which – should’ve been obvious because his dad’s an idiot)

he’s living in port apartments, feeling weird living in the same town as his family again, as well as so many other people he grew up with

reported his family to the proper authorities, mainly to save his own skin and make sure he didn’t get implicated with them. they’re being investigated, but it’s still hush hush currently so it’s not widespread knowledge

he’s been back for about two weeks while he’s moved his stuff into his apartment, but hasn’t made his presence known to anyone else

wanted connections

NYC OR HIGH SCHOOL FRIENDS!!!

any hook-ups or flings he had in the past, age appropriate of course

friends/frenemies/enemies

anyone who was hurt by his departure (the only person who actually knew he left before he did was tate’s best friend, and that’s only because she walked in on him packing and they got into a massive fight over it)

fans of his book even though they don’t know he wrote it asdkfj

mmmmm you know i love a good flirtationship

i’m so bad at wcs i’m so sorry, thanks for reading!!

[crisps-craft]

Hi, Crisp! Things feel pretty stuck right now in my life and I'd looove to know what surprises and/or oportunities will the universe bring me in the near future. I'm an aries sun & rising and a libra moon. Thank you!!!! 🤗

hi! i hope you are doing well. here is what i pulled:

3 of swords, empress, moon, 4 of swords, 10 of swords, king of pentacles, page of swords, 10 of cups, magician

i can tell that you feel stagnant right now- not only did you mention it in your ask, but it is also in the cards. you seem to be struggling emotionally right now- grieving for something that was lost, something that you couldn't have. whatever this was, it felt so right for you, you had such high hopes for it. it was the happiest you'd been in a very long time and like that.. it was taken away. im so sorry- that pain is very frustrating. your emotions are very fiery right now, maybe even a bit defensive. you are very independent right now but you need to watch out for a "me vs. the world" mindset. internally, you feel very chaotic and have been struggling to emulate a sense of inner piece- your heart feels like its on fire. you keep struggling to move on, to rebuild yourself. you feel like you keep falling into the pit of despair and obsession over what was lost -

lots of channeling up there ^^ whew that was a little intense lol. i think that you are struggling with a bit of a lack mindset (or maybe recently in the past you did and now you are learning to move on with it) you need to realize that your inner power is determined by YOU. no one else can determine your worth- no person, no career, no external validation. you need to cherish yourself, forgive yourself, allow yourself to create new beginnings. cherish yourself and realize that you are the only one that you need. you might have struggled with independence where you felt like you needed a relationship or a fulfilling career to determine your worth. but now, you have been getting comfortable in the revelation of independence and what that means for you, how you can channel it, etc. you are very fiery right now and your independence, again, might be sort of a defensive and angry "i dont need anyone!! >:(((" lol. but thats good! im happy you are discovering radical self love. the aries energy is very visible here haha but again, this is a very special and important lesson that your soul has chose to embark on

i think that by finding this independence and finding comfort in it, you will learn to help others- this could be you as a parent, a teacher, things like that. i think you will grow to be a pillar of strength and im seeing you as some sort of mentor for something or something- even an advocate? this will be a strong reservoir of power, knowledge, and integrity. your soul is developing that right now- i feel like that is something you are supposed to do on Earth. these experiences will help you become a leader of sorts- especially for those who are weak. like a defender of the helpless and struggling

listen to your instincts right now- especially your emotional ones. what can they tell you about yourself? what can they tell you about what your values are in life? by listening to yourself, it will make this healing process easier

as for things coming in, yes ! this sense of power haha- esp with the magician card! it is also paired with the 10 of cups (a great and very abundant card) so you are sort of trekking through the mud right now, but just know that this will pay off. the universe wants you to do this inner work and trust me- you will be so much more happy and fulfilled afterwards. you are going to find fulfillment in yourself instead of in unreliable external sources. i just see you coming into your power and that will create a good balance that oddly enough, will help you with relationships, career, etc.

currently / in the past, you were trying to force those things too much- you were too attached and obsessed over the outcome. but by stepping into your power, you will learn to let go. and what happens when we let go / detach? ironically enough, the things that we so badly desired fall into our lap and we are like "oh okay this is cool" but with a more detached and rational perspective. this is giving me spiritual awakening / maturing vibes

hope that this could help !! good things are coming :) just keep working hard, keep being independent and working on yourself. in the end, i think it will bring you that emotional security that you are craving and you wont have to deal with as much anxiety or emotional attachment issues as before. i see you surrounded by the things you love- doing what you love, being around the right people, creating a life for yourself so good you never could have expected it. you just have to keep working on that power and grounding yourself.

i hope that this could resonate, i wish you the best! let me know feedback <3

[katfox]

♡Mysme Fluff Day 5: Proposal♡

Characters: Yoosung, Seven, Jihyun.

Word count: Roughly 400-600+ each.

Summary: The guys are hearing wedding bells, can you hear them too? Watch as the guys confess their eternal love for you.

YOOSUNG || Video Game ||

Yoosung saw the good in you right from the beginning, sure he confused you with his dead relative but he needed closure. He was grieving so you understood, you wanted nothing more that to be his rock and make him strong. He wanted nothing more than to be a man in your eyes, and that's how you treated him. The relationship grew quickly and before you know it Yoosung was graduating from college and starting to work at the animal clinic. You kept supporting him through everything, the best times and the worst times.

Work was stressful in the beginning since he was trying to also build his credentials to open up his own clinic. You always stayed by his side whether you stayed up late supporting him or bringing him meals so he didn't forget to eat. One of his favorite stress relief days were playing LOLOL with you, it was great for him to escape his work mind and enter a fantasy world where you can do anything. It was even better that you had joined in on his raids, he never thought he'd have the perfect relationship. It wasn't perfect but in his eyes he felt it couldn't be any better.

He asked Zen for advice on how to go about things, of course Zen would suggest taking you to one of his shows and proposing. "Hyngg, stop messing around!" They couldn't really agree on how but they could agree on a ring, it was dainty but so beautiful. An idea popped into his mind, he thought this was the perfect way to pop the question.

He managed to get his friends together in the game for a "raid", but they all had a part to play for this special day. He came home feeling "drained", well that is half true but his excitement and love for you overpowers that. He asks you if you want to play, how could you resist him. You go to your office room and take your seats in your respective desks; in this case he was happy that they were facing away from each other and on opposite sides of the room. While playing he tells you that you need to go onto the cliff and look down to see if you can spot something needed for the fight to which you agree.

The crew had been placing flowers on the field spelling out "Marry Me?" He asks if you're at the top, you reply and yoosung gets up kneeling behind you holding the ring waiting for you to see and turn around. "Will you?"

SEVEN || Scavenger Hunt ||

Seven had been really protective of you since the day his emotions came out, he couldn't hold it back any longer. He loved you more than anyone could ever understand. You were his star, the brightest one with sparkles and glow. He didn't want anyone else, it would be impossible to find someone else that really understood him and how he lives his life. He wasn't about to miss out and lose you.

for the past few nights he's been staying up, that's not out of normal for him but these nights were different. He would lay with you as you slept and run his fingers through your hair while whispering sweet nothings into your ear. During that time he wondered what he can do to ask you, so that you'd be the moon in his planetary pull. He looked around for rings and wondered what would make you the happiest. Silly thought though since you'd probably love anything if it was given to you by the man you loved.

Maybe a video game or maybe directly? "No.. maybe a scavenger hunt", that sounded more like him since he was playful and likes to tease. He went to his desk and went to everything that he could do to set up for this exciting day. Planning everything and getting the other members to agree with helping him, having them help was important because they were like family. He searches for a ring, if he couldn't find one he was sure to find a way to make one even if it takes everything he had.

He eventually came across a ring, it was a halo setting because you're his one and only space princess of course. You were more to him that you even knew, he thinks you're his angel sent from heaven. He takes these few days thinking about all the fun you've guys had in your relationship, all the silly cosplaying and crossdressing, teaching you small bits of hacking, and of course art of eating Honey Buddha chips and Dr.Pepper. He relives all the good times in his head and can't wait to make more forever.

Today's the day, he gets everything ready before kissing your head as you slept in. He left the sweetest note along with the first clue's envelope before getting in his car and driving to the final destination. Once you woke up and saw everything you get ready to go on this giant adventure knowing Seven. You start going through your day collecting the next clues with the gifts that came along the way. You make it to the final destination in what seems to have been a day of excitement. It was a planetarium, walking in was so pretty seeing all the stars above your head. Seven's kneeling down on the floor and before he can get a word out you drop your things, running over and tackle him gently.

"Does that mean yes? Haha"

JIHYUN || Photoshoot ||

He thought that there was no way you'd accept him after he left making you wait until he figured himself out. So he was relieved and overjoyed when you agreed to be with him. He loved you more than he loved the sun but you were happy just to be in his life at all. You love him like he was the moon, bright and guiding but not an overpowering glow. He really was precious, learning how to love you and leaning to respect himself the way you've always done.

He thought that you were beautiful, not because of the way you look but because your life brightens up any space you inhabit. He wishes he could've met you first, how better life would've been for him then. Although he suffered so much by her side he doesn't regret it because without her he would've never met and fallen into love with you. He was head over heels, properly this time without the repercussions of his love. When he looks at you he sees hope, strength, selflessness, and grace.

Over the period of time while he was gone, he thought about how he would prove himself to you. Thinking about how this life with you was the best dream he'd never want to wake up from. He cant say that he's ever had such pleasant moments with the person he loved until now. Every morning he wakes up first and just looks down at your beautiful face no matter how you're sleeping. He wouldn't change a single hair on your head, not even if his life was on the line.

This feeling of love and passion gives him butterflies everyday he's with you, although it's been years. Once while working on editing photos for a client a gust of wind flips a magazine open. It must have been a sign from the universe, or at the very least his mother watching over him. The wedding photography ad had given him the courage he needed to start making the plans to ask you. He confided in Jumin to help find a ring that suits you completely.

Jihyun thinks of all the possible ways to ask you without being suspicious upfront. And then the idea of a photoshoot hit him, you'd never suspect a proposal as you've always modeled in photographs for him before. He asks around for any potential locations until Seven conveniently sends you a secluded spot. Legally of course. He sets the props up and tells you the idea of a cliffside photoshoot; you agree happily.

You help with any of the packing since you want his shoots to go perfectly everytime. The next day you wake up to the man of your dreams still sleeping surprisingly, he must have been nervous about popping the question. You figure this would be a good time to start getting ready, seeing the color theme you try looking for a dress that would fit perfectly. It was long and elegant "maybe too much?", you thought to yourself outloud before a kiss gets planted atop your head. "Its beautiful like you," you couldn't help but smile.

You make it to the area, and you become almost breathless seeing the view of this place. He tells you were you stand and takes a few photos of you, some of you both and then he hands you the flower petals. He sets the camera to record before giving you the signal to do as you practiced. You spin around looking at the sky while tossing the petals to the sky as he gets down into position. Once you realize what's going on you see him down on one knee. "Marry me?"

@mmfluffweek

[gutterdreamer-rp]

*slides onto your feed* looking for new RP partners? Me too! Here's a quick look at my main FFXIV OC:

≫ BASICS ≪

FULL NAME: Shrike Elaine Delaney

NICKNAME(S): n/a

BIRTHDAY: 31st Sun of the 1st Umbral Moon

AGE: 30

SPECIES: Hyur

GENDER: Cisgender Woman (ish)

ORIENTATION: Demi-ish Bisexual

OCCUPATION: Working Artist

FAITH: Minimal, Dismissive towards traditional Halonic practices

≫ APPEARANCE ≪

BUILD: Slender beanpole, mostly made of leg

EYE/HAIR: Black hair. One dark brown eye, one half-silver eye

VOICE: Low and husky, faint hints of an Ishgardian accent

HEIGHT: 5 fulms, 10 ilms

PIERCINGS: Ears, navel

FASHION: Swings between “starving artist” and “artistic goth”. Favors dark colors, extremely tall boots, and suspenders.

≫ BACKGROUND ≪

BIRTHPLACE: Ishgard

CURRENT RESIDENCE: Ul’dah, mostly

EDUCATION LEVEL: Some formal education, self-taught about many other things

≫ RELATIONSHIPS≪

BIRTH ORDER: Younger

SIBLINGS: Luci Delaney (older sister)

PARENTS: Phillip Delaney (deceased) and Elaine Delaney (deceased)

SIGNIFICANT OTHER(S): It’s complicated

≫ PSYCHOLOGICAL PROFILE ≪

MORAL ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Good/Neutral depending on the situation

JUNG: INFP - the Mediator

POSITIVE QUALITIES: Imaginative, loyal, open-minded, passionate

NEGATIVE QUALITIES: Quick-tempered, spiteful, pigheaded, reckless

SPOKEN LANGUAGES: Eorzean Common, Old Elezen with an Ishgardian dialect

≫ OOC INFO ≪

Crystal/Mateus

PST timezone

Ingame/Discord RP friendly

21+

Enjoys a wide variety of RP styles

≫ BRIEF BIO≪

Born in Ishgard and raised in poverty only just above Brume-levels, Shrike spent her childhood and teen years as removed from the Dragonsong War as she could get, choosing instead to focus on her dreams of being an artist. She worked as a drawing tutor to help her father and sister make ends meet, often working for the noble families she quietly resented. One such position introduced her to a young nobleman who tried to play at being a bohemian while still being comfortably upper class. Despite her initial dislike of him, they eventually fell in love and became engaged- much to his wealthy family’s chagrin. For a brief, happy period of time, they flourished in the city’s artistic, free-thinking circles.

Ishgard being Ishgard, Edwin and Shrike eventually drew unwanted attention from the inquisitors. Edwin was killed, and his family turned the blame for his death on Shrike, who they viewed as a corrupting, heretical influence. Suddenly completely unemployable, with a target painted on her back and grieving, Shrike chose to flee the city to Gridania, where she spent most of the next decade in a greyed-out, numb state. It’s also where the strange, strong dreams began- dreams that she wrote off as her imagination trying to claw its way back to life.

Maybe she should have examined them a little closer….

A year ago, Shrike moved to Ul’dah, driven by a desire to take control of her life again and reclaim the vibrancy she’d once had. Things were going well, even if she was still made her living via the financial whims of a ruling class she resented. And then...things started to unravel rather spectacularly, and now she is trying to understand a creeping power she didn’t know she had and that threatens to change her from within.

≫ PERHAPS YOU… ≪

Knew her in Ishgard, or know of the lingering resentment Edwin’s family still holds for her

Have commissioned work from her/hired her as a tutor

Met her through various artistic social circles in Gridania or Ul’dah

Have a sensitivity to odd aether and recognize something is amiss with hers

You can find more info at her carrd. Feel free to send me a message if anything here's struck your fancy!

[whenihaveyouromione]

When I Have You - Chapter 4

Read on Fanfiction.net or ao3 if you’d prefer.

Don’t forget to follow the instagram account for this story (without spaces): ‘whenihaveyou . romione’

Chapter 4

It was the day Ron had been dreading more than any other. He'd been trying not to think about it, trying to distract himself as best he could. But after two weeks, he knew that he had to face it. They all did. 

Saying goodbye to Fred. 

The funerals had started yesterday, the first being that of Colin Creevey's. The young Gryffindor had had quite the turnout, including all of the Hogwarts staff, his friends, and even Kingsley Shacklebolt, the newly appointed Minister for Magic. 

It was the mission of the Ministry to have at least some of its members attend each funeral in honour of those who had died fighting valiantly. Every person would be awarded an Order of Merlin, First Class, and their names would be forever etched in two monuments — one at the Ministry, the other at Hogwarts. 

Ron hadn't known Colin all that well, but he'd gone to his funeral anyway, preparing himself for what was to come next. It was sad. Colin’s Muggle parents looked overwhelmed, yet honoured, by the impact their apparently average son had made in a world they weren't even familiar with. 

There had been many tears.

Harry had shown up, but he kept his distance. He didn't even acknowledge Ron or Hermione, which had upset Hermione. After the funeral, she’d made an attempt to speak to him, but Harry had stood away from them, watched the funeral, and then left the moment it was finished. Many people hadn't even seen him arrive, but by the sad look Ginny had on her face after he'd gone, Ron knew she had. Ron placed an arm around her, offering her comfort in the best way he could. 

Colin's funeral had been bad, but Ron knew that it wouldn't even come close to Fred's. Not for the Weasley family. It was due to begin at eleven o'clock, and the time seemed to go both fast and slow at the same time. Fast, because he didn’t want the moment to come, slow because he just wanted to get it over with. 

Ron felt lost as he stared at himself in the small mirror in his room. He was wearing dress robes borrowed from Percy (who, with his former job, managed to buy multiple sets of nice ones), but it didn't feel like enough. Fred shouldn't have even been gone. No one should have. It simply didn't seem fair. 

He was just contemplating changing when a shriek from the kitchen below drew Ron’s attention. A moment later, he heard his mother sobbing.

With a heavy sigh, Ron left his room and headed downstairs to see what had happened. It really was going to be a long day. 

To his utter shock, Molly's tears were not from sadness, but from joy. Standing in the kitchen, tears streaming down his own face, was George. He allowed himself to be engulfed in his mother's arms, and the two stood there for ages, hugging and crying. 

Ginny and Hermione, who were already dressed, stood nearby, tears in their own eyes as they watched the reunion with a mix of sadness and joy on their faces. 

George was home. It had been his mother's most desperate desire, to have all the family back together. Till now, George had refused. Despite some attempts made by all of his brothers in the beginning, George had shut every single one of them out. He had kept his flat door sealed to any magic, and no one wished to use a charm strong enough to break the enchantments. So they had left him to grieve on his own. 

Ron was pleased to see him, because he knew no one had been sure if he'd make it to the funeral at all. 

Tears still falling from his eyes, George pulled away from his mother. He looked around. Everyone was in the kitchen watching, silent. And he hugged them all, one by one. Fleur and Hermione included. 

Afterwards, there was some light talk, but mostly everyone remained silent. The funeral was to take place in the village below, protected from Muggle intruders by magic. It was where Fred had grown up, and it was where he was going to be buried. 

They could have walked, but Ron doubted anyone had much energy for that, so they went to the nearest Apparition point just outside the boundaries of the Burrow. Ron watched everyone turn on the spot, disappearing into thin air. Ginny grabbed Arthur’s hand, and they, too, vanished.

Beside Ron, Hermione gripped his hand. "Ready?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper. 

He swallowed. Would he ever be ready? But he nodded, and he felt the gentle pull of her Disapparating them both down to the village. They landed within the confinements of the enchantments that had been placed there earlier. 

Ron felt sick. So many people were there already; most he recognised, but some were strangers. He saw Lee Jordan, Angelina Johnson, Neville was there…

He felt himself sway on the spot, the only thing stopping him from falling over was Hermione gripping his arm. 

She'd said nothing to him for most of the morning; she didn't need to. Her presence told him enough: she was here for him, no matter what he needed. 

All he needed was for this day to be over. 

They walked forward, Hermione's hand still on his arm. They found two seats near the front, behind his parents. Bill and Fleur and George sat next to Ginny and Percy. Once seated, Hermione linked her fingers with his and they just sat in silence. 

It didn't even occur to Ron to look for Harry until he heard Hermione's gasp. He looked up; Harry had slid into the vacant seat beside her without speaking. He reached across and patted Ron's knee. 

Ginny stared, and he gave her a small smile. Tears rolled down her cheeks. 

As Bill made his way to the stand, a piece of crumbled parchment in his hands, Ron realised that he had been wrong. Getting to the funeral had not been the hardest thing — listening to everyone speak was. Bill had volunteered on behalf of his devastated mother, Arthur said a few words, and Fred's friend Lee Jordan spoke on behalf of George. 

Halfway through Bill's words, hot tears formed, silently sliding down Ron’s face. Once started, they wouldn't stop.

He could no longer see his brother standing up at the front; he was just a blur of shapes as Hermione's arms found him. They were warm and comforting as he buried his face against her shoulder and cried silently against her. His whole body shook, but she didn't let him go. She sat beside him, her arms gently caressing him in comfort, her own tears running down her cheeks. 

His mother's loud sobs echoed throughout, while Bill's voice cracked a number of times while he ploughed on with his speech. Ron barely noticed any of it, lost now, to the despair that he'd been holding back for two weeks. 

Fred was gone. His brother. How could his brother be gone? It just wasn't fair. 

Eventually the funeral ended and Fred was buried in a cemetery filled with so many others. It almost felt as if he was too good to go there, with people who'd probably had a much less remarkable life. 

Hermione stayed by Ron's side the whole time. Even after the tears stopped, and then came again, she didn't let him go. Not once. Not when Fred was buried; not when Ron couldn’t leave the cemetery long after most of the others had; not when Ron could only watch the headstone be placed on top of the freshly covered earth. Through everything, she stayed. 

The sun was just beginning to set when he came to himself. He didn’t know how long he’d been there, watching the grave site, hoping for something that he knew wasn’t going to happen. It was just him and Hermione… and George. 

Hermione finally let him go, her arm running soothingly along Ron’s arm as he made his way to his brother. George knelt by Fred’s grave, head bowed and tears streaming down his face. They hadn’t stopped since Ron had seen him that morning. 

Looking back at Hermione, who smiled sympathetically, he knelt by George and together they stayed like that for who knew how long. Despite summer being very close, the evening air was still cool as the sun completely disappeared and the moon came out. It was a rare clear sky, and Ron liked to think it was Fred’s way of saying one final goodbye. 

When his knees began to ache, and Hermione had long been gone, Ron spoke, his voice hoarse. “Let’s go home.” He dragged George to his feet by the arm. “He’ll be here tomorrow.”

They returned to just outside the Burrow’s boundaries, walking silently through the night, over the hill, until the dim light from their family home flickered in the distance. Like Hermione had done for him throughout the day, Ron kept a hold of his brother, making sure he made every step, catching him if he stumbled. 

When they reached the Burrow, they were greeted by a sullen silence. Everyone was gathered in the kitchen, some holding mugs of tea, others staring at something that wasn’t there. But George’s presence woke them. They all looked up, and Molly stood, running to him and throwing shaking arms around him. 

Hermione walked timidly over to Ron. “How are you?” she asked. 

Ron nodded. He couldn’t find the words to explain, but he was alive, he was coping… more than George, more than his mother. That was something. 

His eyes scanned the room. “Harry…”

“He went back to Grimmauld Place,” she said softly. “But… Ginny went with him.”

It was then Ron realised that his sister was also missing. Without any reason, more tears sprang to his eyes. Hermione wrapped her arms around his waist, her head resting against his chest. His tears rolled down his face and onto the top of her head, but it didn’t seem to bother her. She only held him tighter, lifting her head and whispering so softly that even he struggled to hear her. 

“I love you.”

Those words, as simple as they were, were enough to bring a smile to his lips, and a thought — as horrible as it made him feel to even think it — in that moment, standing in the kitchen with his family, he felt grateful that it wasn’t her funeral he had just come back from. A loss such as that might just have ended him.