#somehow....
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all my mutuals have some cool interest they know so many details on or have some compilation of info on i need to get a cool interest too.
#does the series count as my cool interest. it doesnt right.#i cant say vsynths bc im 95% sure my mutuals know more than me#[holding up a single egg] does THIS count as my-#speaking of egg someone remind me to take my watercolors to work tomorrow so i can draw coko in notebook.#idk what quote to put with her tho. what coko songs do i like. hm#also on the topic of series info id love to u know. complie everything in a doc. but u see#everything is very heavy to handle all at once & also im terrible at organizing info#esp since its so back and forth. like yeah this lyric says this. doesnt mean much until u get to the 6th song#but then u also need that context for the songs in between & after too.#its just a lot & i have like. 85 other things i like to do too. difficult#i have it started but even then it already needs revision & its not even half way thru shoushitsu yet. h#ill be cool to u guys yet just u wait#somehow....
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what if your doppelgänger wasn’t evil it was just a person. what if your doppelgänger wasn’t trying to replace you it was just trying to learn to be a person and you were the best model it had. what if your doppelgänger looked at you with your eyes and said with your voice that it just wanted to be loved. what then.
#aelan speaks#fornax cain#fun fact i used to think imposter syndrome was more literal#not so much “i don’t deserve this good thing and i’ve somehow tricked people into thinking i do”#but more like “i am straight up not a person and everyone knows it”#“and i am TRYING to be a person but i can’t get it right and they all KNOW and i should not be here but i don’t know where else to go”#anyway i was a normal child
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Prepare yourself.
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i think we should remind musicians they can absolutely make up little stories for their songs btw. it doesn’t have to be about them at all. you can invent a guy and put him in situations to music. time honoured tradition in fact.
#sorry im bored of the same tags on this lmao#sometimes i think the confessional style loses impact because everything has to be excavated from the depths of the soul#and somehow. confessional writing seems to be going with the most disaffected bland sound possible. odd.#i love deeply personal songs! i love when songs sound like they mean something to the artist!#something something wider issue of mining trauma and being performatively vulnerable for quote unquote content#idk i don’t have the actual knowledge to write about this well there’s just something not landing for me recently#mine
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my mom is soooo upset because she dropped and cracked one of her chicken’s eggs that she knew was fertilized. it’s her first time trying to hatch chicks and she was so excited. this was one of two eggs she’d seen moving while candling them. she feels so bad.
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never let anyone tell you that trawling through mediocre victorian poetry isn't worth it. we just happened upon an absolute BANGER of a worm poem. go read it or else 🪱🪱🪱
#was calling beckett and scouring the works of eliza cook looking for lesbianism#good amounts of lesbianism in evidence but unfortunately very little in the way of good poetry#APART from this worm one which DOES NOT MISS#eliza cook#is there a thriving eliza cook tag on tumblr. somehow i doubt it#the hand of the giant and the heart of the brave / must turn weak and submit to the worm and the grave!#not an original theme ofc but GOD the treatment is delightful. so fresh so gleeful some rlly nice use of sound. rlly solidly constructed#words#gay belligerence
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our secret
#continuing my legacy of can’t decide on lighting 😭😭😭#somehow never got into wicked during my musical theatre era :( now i atone#but i do know my fave song is popular and i needed to pee SO BAD during it my god i saw the light#wicked#elphaba thropp#glinda upland#gelphie#my doodles#artists on tumblr#wicked movie
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proud to say that I have never once in my life figured out the whodunit in any crime story I've read or watched. I just let the facts and clues wash over me, absorbing absolutely none of it. I am the audience they think of when they throw in red herrings, in case you've ever wondered "who would fall for this obvious false lead". it's me. I am the idiot viewer/reader. not once has an obviously framed clue revealed anything to me. my head is completely empty when I consume these stories.
#rover rambles#I joke a lot about how stupid hastings is#but in truth I am about as good as solving these cases as he is#possibly even worse somehow#and it's not for lack of wanting to solve them#in fact I have attempted it many times#I simply am stupid
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hey does this make sense? am i reaching?
#i need to somehow connect my top two faves im like baki going through that plastic glass barrier thingy#thistle tag#thistle dungeon meshi#kabru of utaya#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#ryoko kui#hall of fame#......dont like... if you come back to the og post click on the hof tag#please
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Growing up is actually just enjoying the exact same things you enjoyed at 14 years old, but in a more gay way
#dan and phil#hp marauders#dan and phil's lesbian audience#dan howell#phil lester#terrible influence tour#lesbian marauders fan#marauders#my entire personality at 14 was reading books and watching YouTube#and now my personality is split 50/50 between gay harry potter fics and dan and phil#I'm 23 now btw#what's that one Chappell Roan line?#and even all the change it's somehow all the same
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hrghh another long and difficult day... TUMBLR!! fetch me a photo of The Fictional Character .....
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the main problem with this time of year is the irresistible urge to get fully into bed at like 5:34 pm and outside is like yesss, yesss do it, it's what you deserve yesss. like is it depression or is it just november
#it's november obvs#december is not like this!!#today after work i shut the macbook i got into bed and i played that fruit tetris game#while listening to something called 'lofi roman empire'#for 1.5 hours#zero wrinkles in the brain after that completely smooth#and then somehow i cooked dinner
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engagement bait craft videos have gotten so bizarre i think this is legitimately an art form now
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Grief
ref photo by @jawsstone
#artists on tumblr#my friend let me use a really gorgeous photo they took#it made my brain go brrr#and i had to draw this#i usually take my own reference pics so it was cool to work from someone else's#enjoyed drawing this a lot#despite the subject matter#i saw a pretty scene of a narrow alley#with white stairs stained black from people walking on them#and somehow it took my brain here#grief visits every house
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