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ohbueckers · 2 days ago

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HEART OF A WOMAN. we ain’t spoke in so long, probably put me in the past. i can still get you wet, and i can still make you laugh.

01, CHAPTER ONE. OLD SPARKS.

ju speaks. who’s catching my word play for this chapter ooouuu.. i’m having so much fun writing them already and yes, maya’s gonna be a problem (i am just so predictable). pairing. wnba!paige bueckers x fem!oc. warnings. sexual innuendos. kinda content too? idk this fic feeds you all.

present day, may, 2025.

los angeles still doesn’t feel real.

it’s like a whole new game out here, and i’ve been telling myself i can handle it. going first in the draft was wild—i’d dreamt of that moment since i was a kid, but hearing my name called, realizing it was real, felt different. la’s been something else too, this city that’s both too big and somehow feels small once you’re in it. i’ve got an apartment with this insane view too. floor to ceiling windows, sunlight flooding in every morning, palm trees out front like something off a postcard, but it doesn’t quite feel like home yet. i guess i thought maybe it would by now.

the team’s been great, though. down to the vets, the coaching staff, the media team… every single one of them welcomed me like i’ve always belonged here, and that makes things easier. cam threw this party tonight to really celebrate me being here, not just another pr event, but like… i don’t know, like they actually wanted to get to know me better. her backyard’s all polished up. the gates hold up some fairy lights, and the smell of barbecue just tops it all off.

maya’s been around since day one, practically the second i landed here. she’s one of our coordinators—smart, organized, and just enough older than me. stanford grad, of course, which she’s mentioned just enough times that i know she’s proud of it. there’s something good about her. yeah, she’s good. she knows how to handle herself, that’s for sure.

nailea hasn’t been around. i thought i’d see her by now, maybe even catch lurking during one of my practices or just… run into her somewhere. i mean, i’m sure she wouldn’t quit her job because of me. she’s been quiet, out of sight. which is fine. we haven’t really talked since before the draft—if that’s what you’d call it. it’s probably for the best. i don’t think she really wants to talk anyway.

i’m mid-sentence, talking to rae and rickea about their pregame rituals when maya steps up, her manicured hand resting casually on my slouched shoulder like it belongs there. she laughs at something rae says, smiling, and i feel myself ease into the conversation a little more.

rae’s all animated, talking about how she won’t step onto the court without this neon scrunchie she swears by. i’m leaning in to give her grief for it when i catch something in my periphery—someone, actually.

nailea’s here. at my welcome to the league party, maybe just coming by to say she showed up. i’m sure cam would kill her if she didn’t, they got pretty close last year. she looks like she just stepped out of my memories, if you think about that memory everyday.

i suck in, turning in attempt to not make myself seen. then, rae, three jell-o shots deep and definitely feeling it, pats my thigh in excitement and grins wide. “nai! c’mere!” she calls her over, completely missing how i’m trying not to look too invested.

i bite my lip, turning my head back over. i see how she hesitates, and then she looks at me. there’s no emotion, not a single ounce of longing or surprise. she looks at me like i’m nothing. it hurts more than i’d ever admit, but at the same time, i get it. i don’t exactly have the right to expect anything else.

her eyes shift to the others, weighing her options, probably playing out how the entire encounter would go in her head, but rae’s insistence doesn’t really give her much of a choice. she flashes us a grin, though i’m sure it isn’t for me, before she slowly waltzes over.

my eyes follow her like some unconscious habit until she’s almost in reach. as she comes closer, i find myself sizing her up, cataloging the way her hair falls just right, how her shirt hangs off her shoulders. then, out of nowhere, rickea shoves a finger into my ear from my left, and i flinch, turning to see her arched eyebrows silently demanding that i lock in. i don’t question it—i do. a little bit.

“nai handles a good chunk of our pr. she’s doing game day operations this year too,” rae cuts through. she was on some paid internship last year, testing out every role the sparks had to offer to see what she liked. she moved up. got the job.

i don’t know why it stings that she’s doing good without me.

“we know each—“ i begin.

“we went to high school to—“ nai says at the same time as me, and i look at her. rickea is stifling back a laugh beside me, and nai finishes her sentence.

“paige and i went to high school together.” she says, and i stay silent. high school? is that all i am now? a high school buddy?

rae’s grin grows wider, and she’s so excited about it i can barely make out her words. “she’s so great, and basically our backbone now,” she says, nudging nailea’s shoulder. “if it weren’t for her, i’d be late to half my interviews, right?” she laughs, a little too loud.

“guess you owe her then,” i say simply, forcing a grin. nai’s eyes flash to mine, but they’re off me just as quick. i let mine stay, squinting as maya begins to ramble.

“and she makes my job way easier.” maya’s fingers tap against my shoulder, almost like she’s staking a claim. “you ever need someone to keep you in line, paige, she’s your girl,” she adds, smiling at nai, though there’s some unfamiliarity to it. i can tell that they know each other, just not well enough i’m assuming.

nai’s eyes drop to maya’s hand, just a quick glance, but it’s enough to make me hyper-aware of the touch. her gaze returns to my face, a single eyebrow raised in that subtle way that’s more telling than words. like she’s already put it all together, and she doesn’t need to say a thing. instinctively, i shift, shrugging maya’s hand off with a casual roll of my shoulder, trying to mask it as if i’m just adjusting my posture.

nai doesn’t react, but her mouth twitches, a hint of a smirk, there and gone.

she lets out a soft laugh as i lean more against the table now, and i caught the way maya dropped her hand to her side. “i think paige has got it handled.”

i raise an eyebrow, leaning back just a little. “could always use the backup.”

nai’s eyes flash with a quick, knowing glint as she tilts her head, that slight smirk of hers appearing like she’s been waiting for an opening. “backup?” she repeats, nearly cheerful. i hated her tone. “thought you were more into… side options than backups, paige.”

it’s subtle, just low enough that only i catch the full weight of it, but it lands. i let out a low chuckle, stroking my chin and licking my lips. “aight,” i say, swallowing down any reaction, “i set myself up for that.”

maya gives me a sidelong look, sensing the tension but probably not quite getting it. nai laughs softly, a quick, dismissive sound that shouldn’t hit as hard as it does. it’s almost like she’s proud of getting that dig in. i cross my arms over my chest, and for some reason, i can’t contain my own smile.

rickea jumps in then, catching the vibe—or maybe just rescuing me. “anyway!” she says, her voice bright, easing into some story about some mascot switch-up from last year nai had to handle. i nod along, pretending i’m invested, though every part of me is still reeling from nai’s words, her laugh, the way she looked at me like she had me all figured out.

but maybe that’s what she wants me to think.

the backyard’s emptied out now, save for a few stray bottles and a couple of plastic jello cups scattered across the tables. i slide the glass door open and step inside, the house now filled with some low music from a record player. i was planning to find cam, to thank her for throwing this whole thing together. but when i come into the kitchen, it’s nai i see, her sleeves rolled up, forearms wet, scrubbing out a vase under the sink.

she’s focused, eyebrows furrowed just slightly, and i catch myself looking just a second too long before she looks up herself, catching me in the act. she pauses for a moment, her hands stilled under the water before she continues.

“didn’t take you for the clean up crew,” she mumbles, a little low that i almost don’t hear it over the running water.

i shrug, poking my bottom lip out. “figured i owed cam for putting this together,” i say, eyes still fixed on her. “nothin’ like a little gratitude, right?”

she lets out a little scoff, eyes still on the vase, fingers working over the smooth glass, rinsing it under the stream. “cam’s got enough gratitude coming her way,” she murmurs, and i can’t really read the implication. “she doesn’t need more from you.”

the words are light, almost casual, but they land with an edge that sticks. i take a slow step closer, letting the sliding door click shut behind me as i stand by it, almost like i’m stuck.

“well,” i start, beginning to stroll closer with my hands tucked in my pockets, “maybe i’m here because i wanted to check in. see how you’re doing.”

her eyes cut to me briefly, unimpressed. “i’m good, paige,” she says, letting the vase drip dry on a towel, and turning her attention to the next one. “never been better, actually.”

“great,” i say, not breaking eye contact, even as she keeps hers on the dishes, hands slowing just slightly. “then you won’t mind the company.”

she lifts an eyebrow, smirking, and i feel my pulse spike. “company?” she repeats, cocking her head as she pauses, hands resting on the edge of the sink, she says, “i think i’ve had enough of yours for a lifetime.”

i wiggle my eyebrows at her. “aw, don’t be like that, nai.” i can’t help the laugh that slips out, soft and a little cocky. “where’d you pick up all this lil’ attitude at?” i manage to get a little closer with each word until i’m rounding the island. she knows i’m there, close, and trying to ignore it probably.

she sighs, setting the vase down with a clink that sounds just a little too deliberate before picking up the last one. “life has a way of teaching you things. people, too.” she cuts her eyes my way, just barely, still trying to act like i’m not right in her space.

“oh, so now i’m a life lesson?” i murmur, stepping so that i’m almost right beside her, leaning on the counter. “but you’re still here. helpin’ clean up my party.”

she hesitates, and i can see her jaw tense just slightly. “i’m here for cam.”

“cam, huh?” i murmur, my eyes never leaving her. “and what about me?”

she laughs, a little breathless, and it’s the first real sign of her softening. i’ll take whatever i can get. “you’re somethin’ else. you know that?”

of course i know that. she knows i know that, she used to tell me it all the time. she reaches to cut the water off, flipping the vase over on the counter to dry. “good somethin’ or bad somethin’?” i ask, inching just a little closer as i tuck my bottom lip between my teeth.

“depends on the day,” she replies simply, and i can tell she’s trying to occupy herself as she rearranges the glasses.

i smile, facing her as i lean an arm on the counter. “that a challenge?” i lick my lips. “you know i love a good challenge.”

she scoffs lightly, rolling her eyes but staying put nonetheless. “don’t think you’re up for this one, bueckers.”

“oh, i’m up for it,” i counter, following her every move. “in fact, i thrive on it.” i’ve managed to get so close now that i can smell the scent of her shampoo mingling with the faint floral notes of soap. i can’t help but notice the newfound lightness to it too, and i realize she must’ve switched out some old with some new.

“mhm?” she asks, that smirk returning as she finally looks at me. i love when she hums like that, like i’ve got her at loss for words or something. her gaze flicks down to my lips for just a heartbeat, but i catch it.

“yeah,” i whisper, testing the waters. “and i’m pretty good at winning.”

i can see the shift in her expression—the way her breath hitches just a bit. “and what do you think you’re gonna win?” it’s like it took everything in her to say that as she exhales.

i lean back slightly, just enough to meet her eyes fully, but my focus has found her lips again. “you know what i want,” i say, and my voice is almost a whisper. “i think you know exactly what i want.”

there’s a faint smirk on her face as she grips the counter. “no.” she says, seemingly very aware of my intentions as she shakes her head, but doesn’t move an inch.

i let my tongue swarm my mouth hungrily. “just one.” i practically beg.

she leans in, leaving a soft, fast peck on my lips, and i’m afraid it isn’t enough for satisfaction. she’s back staring, and before i get the chance to say anything about it, it’s like she already fought the doubts in her mind as she throws herself into me, lips crashing.

my lips press against hers in that familiar, heady rush that i’d almost convinced myself i’d forgotten. she doesn’t pull away—instead, her hand slips up to my shoulder, the same one maya had her paws on just a couple hours ago, and fuck i can barely bring myself to think about that.

my hand finds her waist, gripping just enough to feel her press against me, her breaths shallow, matching mine. i want to rip her clothes off and take her here, no matter how uncordial that may be, but the universe seems to have other plans.

she tastes like everything i’ve had time to reflect on, every memory i know she tried to bury. i’m rough, hands squeezing her waist so tight like i’m scared she’ll slip away if i let go.

but just as i’m getting lost in her, we’re interrupted by the sound of footsteps. we break apart instantly, spinning toward the door just in time to see cam step in, her eyes widening as she stops short, eyebrows lifting as she takes in the scene.

my tongue darts to the corner of my mouth as i place my hands behind my back awkwardly, as if to keep them from wandering. nai is smoothing out her shirt (the most obvious thing you could do in a situation like this), that guarded look slipping right back into place as she clears her throat.

“paige was just leaving.”

#paige bueckers #paige bueckers x oc #paige bueckers fic #paige bueckers fanfiction #paige bueckers uconn #paige bueckers smut #paige bueckers x fem #lgbtq fanfiction #lgbtqia #wlw fanfic #wlw fiction #wlw smut #wlw blog #wlw yearning #paige bueckers blog

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aventurineswife · 3 days ago

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hear me out!

Reader was in a relationship with aventurine and Dr. Ratio, BUT! It was like Aventurine and Rayio liked eachother more than they liked the reader!

You following along?

Good! Cause I'm not done!

THEN! Reader goes to bar gets a little tipsy (read as drunk) and ends up venting their sadness and frustration to kind strangers willing to listen! (Aka Argenti and Boothill!) Things end up almost getting, suggestive to say the least before reader ends up stopping any more advances and leaves, little does reader know that her encounter with Argenti and Boothill would leave them desperate for more...

(Basicaly Yandere poly Argenti and Boothill x Reader)

And, this is just something else I wanted to say but what if Aventurine and Ratio notice reader kinda drifting away, ad they notice that reader is starting to make more friends and reader starts trying to spend less time with them? Maybe somehow they findout Argenti and Boothill are obsessed with reader? I see Aventurine and Dr. Ratio being possessive of things or people they consider "theirs" and slowly they start becoming as obsessive as Boothill and Argenti and now reader has 2 couples vying for her attention!

( I totally understand if this is to much or confusing!)

“I Wanna Make You Mine”

Summary: You are in a relationship with Aventurine and Ratio, but you began to feel like an afterthought as your partners’ interest in each other overshadows your bond. One night, seeking solace and a brief escape from your lonely frustrations, you meet two enigmatic strangers at a bar—Argenti and Boothill. Both quickly become captivated by you, their admiration bordering on obsession. You find yourself ensnared in a dangerous game of affection and desire, with each group willing to do whatever it takes to win your undivided attention. The question is; Who are you going to be choosing?

Tags: Aventurine x Reader x Ratio, Argenti x Reader x Boothill, Polyamory, Not really a love triangle since you pulled 4 men/Love pentagon, Jealousy & Possessiveness, Yandere Themes, Slow Burn Romance, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Pining, Longing, Light Drunkenness, Obsessive Behaviour, Emotional Tension, Emotional Angst, Slight Cheating Behaviour.

Warnings: Possessive and Obsessive Behaviour, Light Alcohol Use, Yandere Themes, Emotional Distress, Do not try this at home or think this is cute and all. This is fictional.

A/N: I'M DEFINITELY HEARING YOU & DON'T WORRY ANON I UNDERSTOOD YOUR REQ!! 🤭 THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING FOR STUFFS LIKE POLYAMORY RELATIONSHIPS (SO DON'T COME AFTER ME IF I DID SOMETHING WRONG!!) AND YANDERE! 😪 I personally don't ship any characters in HSR but for the sake of this fic, they're being shipped.

In the dim glow of a hazy bar, the soft clinking of glasses and murmurs filled the air as you downed your third drink. The evening had started with only a desire to escape the gnawing ache that Aventurine and Ratio had unwittingly left in your heart. For so long, you had been the third in your relationship, watching the connection between them bloom far more intensely than their affection for you. It was hard to pinpoint when exactly you began to feel this way, but tonight, the loneliness finally hit.

You sighed, stirring your drink absentmindedly, lost in thought until a warm voice cut through the fog of your mind.

“Are you alright?” Looking up, you were met with the striking gaze of a man with fiery red hair and green eyes that sparkled with curiosity and concern.

“Y-yeah, I’m fine...” you muttered, masking your sadness with a weak smile. But even before the words left your mouth, you knew they were unconvincing.

“Ah, doesn’t look like it to me.” drawled another voice from beside you. Turning, you found yourself facing a man who looked like he walked straight out of a rugged holo-western. He had a silver gleam in his eye and a smirk that promised trouble, yet there was something comforting in his casual demeanor.

They introduced themselves—Argenti, the knightly-looking redhead, and Boothill, the roguish gunslinger. They struck an odd pair, yet somehow, they both seemed genuinely concerned. That genuine concern, however small, was enough to tug open the lock on the emotions you’d been bottling up.

“I just feel like… no matter how much I try, I’m always a shadow between them,” you confessed, the alcohol loosening your words. “It’s like I’m just… there. I know they love me, but sometimes, it feels like they’re happier with each other.”

Argenti’s gaze softened as he leaned closer, his voice rich and sincere. “A soul like yours deserves to be cherished, never neglected,” he said, his tone filled with a quiet reverence. “I see a light in you, something so rare and beautiful. Anyone who fails to treasure it is unworthy of your heart.”

Boothill leaned in with a sly grin, his eyes flickering with something darker. “If they can’t see what they have, then maybe you’re wastin’ your time on ‘em.”

The warmth of their words and the way they leaned closer, as if drawn to you, sent a flutter through your heart. It had been so long since anyone looked at you like that—with full, unbridled interest.

His hand moved gently to the small of your back, his touch radiating warmth. “Allow us to show you what it means to be honored—to be loved without restraint.”

His words lingered in the air, weighted with a knightly promise. You felt your pulse quicken at his sincerity, yet even through the comfort of his presence, something held you back.

The heat in his touch and Boothill’s gaze made your heart pound faster, and for a dizzying moment, you felt tempted. But, catching yourself, you pulled back, gathering the scraps of your resolve. “I… I can’t. Not like this,” you stammered, stumbling up from the table. “Thanks, but… I need some air.”

You barely noticed their longing stares as you left, desperate to clear your mind, unaware of the yearning spark you had ignited in both men.

Days passed, and you tried to shake off that night. But a strange unease began settling over you. Everywhere you went, you could feel eyes on you. Argenti’s soft, almost reverent gaze in places he couldn’t possibly be; Boothill’s devilish grin, catching you in your peripheral vision even when he wasn’t there. As if they were everywhere, waiting.

The more you found yourself in their orbit, the more their obsession seemed to grow. Argenti, once chivalrous, was now desperate for every glance, every smile you gave. Boothill, once a lighthearted scoundrel, grew possessive, his words laced with dark promises of keeping you safe… from anyone who dared come between you.

Your time with Aventurine and Ratio was no longer as comforting as it once was, either. They sensed the shift in you. Aventurine’s charming smile had faded into something sharp, his eyes assessing as he caught sight of Argenti and Boothill’s names in your messages. Ratio’s typical aloofness twisted into jealousy, his usual intellectual grace tempered by a fiercer intensity.

One evening, as you arrived home, you found Aventurine and Ratio waiting. Ratio was seated calmly, but his piercing gaze was anything but passive. Aventurine leaned casually against the wall, his fingers twitching as if he longed to reach out to you—or hold onto you, tightly.

“We’ve been worried.” Aventurine said with a soft smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

Ratio inclined his head slightly, his eyes narrowing. “Tell me, have you… made some new friends?”

The question caught you off guard, and you stammered out a response. But their knowing expressions only confirmed the suspicion that had been growing in both of them.

That night, they wouldn’t let you go. Aventurine’s once-teasing nature had turned possessive, his charming smile a mask for the tension simmering beneath. Ratio was no different, wrapping his arm around you, his touch firmer than usual, as if reminding you that you belonged to them. They held you close, more than ever before, but their embrace now felt like a cage, one you couldn’t escape.

And just as you thought you had nowhere to turn, there came a knock on the door. The sound was calm, persistent, carrying a strange sense of finality.

You didn’t need to open it to know who it was. The question that burned in your mind wasn’t if it was Argenti and Boothill waiting outside. It was what they would do now that they had come for you. And with Aventurine and Ratio on the other side, waiting to stake their claim, you realized you were caught in a game where escape might be impossible.

The question was: who would be the first to make their move?

Don't ask for part 2 lmaoo💀

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heart-of-the-morningstar · 1 day ago

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✨All Dolled Up✨

Lucifer x f!sinner reader

Summary: After months of hard work, Lucifer finally gifted you a welcome present after joining the hotel! In return, you decide to make something of your own just for him! Your gift, however, turns out to be even more special than you intended...

This is a surprise story for my friend @rosen-und-mondlicht who gave me this very creative and fun idea for a story! Love you boo <3

Huge thanks to @canihaveacandycane and @citrusbatsandhoneybees for the help on this one!

Warnings: smut, 18+, fingering, oral (m & f receiving), multiple orgasms, p in v

Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel! We're so happy to have you stay with us! We hope your time here is an enjoyable one!

-Hotel Staff

P.S. Hey there! I'm sorry this took so long to give you, I just had to make it perfect! I hope you like it!

-Lucifer

It was custom for every new resident to receive a welcome letter. Even though you've already been at the hotel for 6 months now, it was still appreciated. You walked into your room and found your very late letter sitting next to a small white box complete with a red bow resting at the foot of your bed. The gift was unexpected; however, you hadn't heard of anyone else receiving one. Once you read the card, you figured you knew the reason for its delay. Lucifer, always the perfectionist, must have stalled the whole operation.

You hadn't expected to become so close to the King of Hell himself. You were weary of him at first, I mean, who wouldn't be? Everyone knew about the fallen angel. But after a while, you started to warm up to him. It was easy to see that he was nothing like you imagined or had been told about while you were alive. He was a kind soul, a dreamer who loved his daughter dearly, and someone who was very, very lonely. You learned about his previous wife Lilith and how she had left several years ago never and hadn't been heard from since. You could tell this deeply affected Lucifer even though he did his best to hide it through his jovial persona. You two grew pretty close, he found you incredibly easy to talk to, as if he had known you his whole life. You enjoyed your time together and you found joy in listening to whatever he chose to ramble on about that day be it his latest project or reminiscing about his daughter Charlie when she was younger. You'd never admit it, but you had developed somewhat of a crush on the king. But who were you to get involved with the ruler of Hell? It wasn't your place as a mere sinner and you dared not ruin the friendship you had built with him, odd as it may be.

Curiously, you picked up the box and casually began to unwrap it. you lifted the lid to find a cute little rubber duck that resembled you! All the little details down to your hair, your eye color, and somehow it managed to capture your smile in its little orange beak. You loved it, no wonder to took him so long to complete; every detail was perfect. It was such a thoughtful gift, and you felt the burning need to return the favor! Who knows the last time Lucifer had been given a gift. Why couldn't it be from you?

You noticed something else in the box too and lifted it up gently. It was a beautiful white and red feather. You knew it must have been his, but did he mean to give this to you as well? Knowing him, he must have worked frantically to get this gift finished. A few must have fallen off during the packing process; you knew how stressed the man could get. But the feather gave you an idea. You couldn't make rubber ducks like him, that was his specialty. But you did, however, know how to make little felt dolls! You were very crafty during your life and you figured you might as well use the skills you have to do something good.

You spent most of the night sewing and stitching everything together, ignoring the many warning signs your body gave you in order to try and get you to sleep. You were stubborn, however. Once you started a project, it was almost impossible for you stop until it was complete. It was nearly dawn by the time you finally finished the little doll. Well, almost finished! Everything was perfect, from the little snake that wrapped around his little hat to the tiny golden buttons on his jacket. There was only one things left to do! You grabbed the feather that you had found your box and delicately placed it inside of the small slit you had left open on the side of the doll. You thought the feather could represent a heart, something meaningful to give the doll and make it different from anything else.

Finally, you stitched the last gap closed, cutting the strong with your teeth to finally complete your gift. You stared at the doll for a moment to admire your work. And you were happy. But something weird happened. Just then, a small flash of golden light emanated from the doll but disappeared as quickly as it came. You set it down and rubbed your eyes. You looked over the doll again for another minute, but the flash of light never returned. You chalked it up to being a trick of the light. And considering the fact that you were sleep deprived, you wouldn't put it past your brain to start pulling tricks on you. You shrugged it off, taking the doll with you to bed. You drifted off to sleep easily, your eyes growing heavy as soon as your head hit the pillow. You clutched the doll close to your chest, giving it a small peck on the cheek.

"Goodnight, Lucifer," you whispered to it before letting your body fall unconscious.

****

You woke up with a start to the sound of your alarm blaring. It was 8:00 a.m. Not nearly enough sleep. You realized you hadn't moved all night; your body must have been too exhausted to toss and turn. You found yourself still holding the doll and smiled to yourself. You were still exhausted, but you knew Charlie would be sad if you missed breakfast, so with all of your remaining strength, you pulled yourself out of bed and begrudgingly began to get ready for the day. You decided you use a small tan paper you had from one of your shopping trips bag to hold the doll, thanking yourself for not just tossing it away like you normally would have.

You made your way to the kitchen knowing Charlie would be preparing breakfast for everyone. But to your surprise, when you entered through the kitchen door, it was not the princess you found at the stove, but her father. You heard him whistling a song you never heard before, a perfect melody. Your heart began to race as you walked a little bit closer to him, the smell of pancakes filling your senses.

"I can hear you, you know," Lucifer called out playfully as he flipped a pancake in the air. You couldn't help but giggle.

"Well, I'm glad," you retorted, now standing beside him. "I didn't really want to be scaring you when you’re working over a hot stove like that."

He gave you a small smirk without looking away from what he was doing. "Oh yeah, that truly would be terrible, wouldn't it?" he laughed. You knew he was more or less invincible, being an angel and all. Still, you didn't want to distract him.

"I thought Charlie was usually the one to prepare breakfast," you commented.

"Oh, she is!" Lucifer smiled. "But I told her I would handle the meals today. My little girl works so hard around here, you know? I thought it would be nice to take something of her plate...so to speak." He chuckled at his own joke as he laid the freshly made stack of pancakes on the neatly assembled row of plates.

"Do you need any help?" you asked, setting down the brown paper bag behind the kitchen island out of his view.

"Sure!" He turned around and pointed to the condiments he had laid out. "Could you hand me the syrup and the whipped cream over there?" You did as he asked and brought him the items. Lucifer began to smother the fluffy cakes in syrup and drawing little ducks with the whipped cream to top them all off. When he was finished, you and him delivered breakfast to the hotel residents. You came back to the kitchen to notice there were two plates of pancakes left.

"Oh, we forgot some," you commented. "Who did we forget?"

Lucifer only smiled. "Those are for us, silly! You have to eat too, don't you?"

In your effort to help, you completely forgot that you hadn't eaten. He handed you your plate and fork and you two stood there eating his delicious creation as you leaned against the countertop.

"These are amazing!" you tried to say with your mouth still half full.

Lucifer swallowed his last bite and gave you a toothy grin. "Why thank you! I'll be honest, I haven't cooked in a long time. I was afraid I had forgot how. But if you like them, then I know I succeeded!"

You set your finished plate down and crossed your arms. Lucifer seemed to be in more high spirits than usual. You liked seeing him like this; just happy. "If you don't mind me saying, Lucifer, your mood seems...different. N-Not in a bad way! Just...more full of energy."

He followed your motion and set his plate down behind him. "You think so?"

"Yeah," you continued. "It's nice to see. I like a happy Lucifer."

He smiled at you and left out a soft sigh. "Can I tell you something?" You tilted your head in confusion but nodded. "This is gonna sound a little weird, maybe a little bit crazy, but just hear me out, okay?"

"Of course! I never think you're crazy," you smiled. His hand found the back of his neck; he looked as though he was nervous about whatever he was about to tell you. Your heart started racing again.

"Last night, when I was sleeping...in the middle of the night, I felt something...I don't know how to say this...constricting me?" You furrowed your brow, not understanding what he was trying to say. "Maybe that's not the right word. Let's say...holding me. That sounds better."

"Holding you?" you questioned, "I'm not sure I get it."

"Okay uhh, let me think..." he placed his hand under his chin. "It almost felt like...cuddling?"

"So...someone was cuddling you last night?" you spoke in a hushed tone. You feared the worst when you heard him say those words. Lucifer noticed your change in demeanor and quickly back peddled.

"No, no, that's the thing! I was alone last night!" he reassured you. "I always sleep alone, ever since..." he shook his head as to move on and forget it. But you knew what he was going to say. "It was the strangest damn thing, in the middle of the night no less! And there was a voice that..."

Your brain refused to acknowledge Lucifer's last few words and were more focused on the fact that he was indeed alone last night. "That...certainly is odd. What could..."

Oh no...

Your eyes went wide with fear, your whole body froze, you couldn't bring yourself to finish your thought.

The doll.

The doll you made for him. You went to bed with it last night. You held it in your arms. You kissed it goodnight!

Oh no, oh no, oh no!

"Is everything alright?" Lucifer snapped you back to reality. "You look paler than me!"

You swallowed hard trying to muster up any sort of response. "Y-Yeah! Yeah, I'm totally fine! I just...I realized I promised I would help Angel with something this morning and I completely forgot! So, I'll see you later!"

You didn't give Lucifer a chance to respond as you ran out the door and grabbed the bag you had hidden from view. You didn't let up until you reached your room and slammed the door behind you. You set the bag down carefully onto your bed and gingerly removed the doll from it, using only your nails to hoist it out. You let it lay in your hand as you stared at it with panicked eyes.

"What the hell did I do?!" you asked yourself in a berating tone. "It's just a doll, it shouldn't have - hold on..." A sudden memory came flooding back to you. You called the doll emitting a strange light the night before as soon as you finished sewing the remaining stitches. Last night, you thought it was just the trick of the light; it was late and you were beyond exhausted. But that didn't explain why Lucifer was able to feel you holding him last night. The last thing you did was add "...the feather!"

That must be it! His feather must have caused the connection. Lucifer was an angel after all, a magical being of pure light. Surely anything that was a part of him would carry those same properties. You had to get rid of it! But how? You didn't know the extent of what this doll could feel. Surely stabbing it with a knife would cause him some pain...you think. Given Lucifer was more or less indestructible, you still didn't really want to test that theory.

So, you stood there with the doll limp in your hand unsure of what to do with it next.

You couldn't bring yourself to destroy it, you put so much work into it and it would kill you to get rid of something that was meant to be an innocent gift. The best option would be to hide it, leave somewhere no one would find it and forget that it even exists. But then, the thought of Lucifer's smile crosses your mind. He was so happy this morning, happier than you've ever seen him. And it was because of you. Not that you would every dream of telling him that. But maybe...maybe it would be alright if you kept it. If you held it close to you at night. Perhaps it wasn't the most moral decision, but hey, you're in Hell, morality is not a common practice here. You brought that doll to your chest and held it tight. "I'm sorry..." you murmured to it, "If I can't tell you how I really feel, maybe this is the next best thing."

For the next several nights, you went to bed with the held tightly. And for the next several days, you couldn't bring yourself to face Lucifer. Anytime you heard him approaching or his voice getting closer, you ran the other direction. But not far enough to completely miss him. While you hid from his view, he had that same jovial expression since the day you made breakfast together. It warned your heart to know that what you were doing had a positive effect on him, even though you couldn't shake the guilt that came with that either. Sometimes he would catch you by surprise and spot you from across the hall. Lucifer would call out to you but you made it a point to get out of there as fast as possible. Strangely enough, he never sought you out after you ran, but you thought that was for the best.

One night before you went to bed, you sat up on your mattress staring at your creation resting in your palms.

"I'm a coward," you told yourself. "I should just tell him the truth. Why am I even doing this? I want him to be happy, but this isn't right. I shouldn't have put the feather in there, I should have just thrown this in my closet and not given it a second thought. But no! Now I'm avoiding him like a frightened cat because I don't have the guts to tell him..." You sighed. "One more night. Just one more. And then I'm done. I'll never think about this again." You turned off your lamp and drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

****

You cracked your eyes open the next morning, the light of the red sky filling your room. You sat up and rubbed your eyes before feeling around for your doll. You couldn't find it. Your opened your eyes wider. The doll wasn't there. You leaped from the bed and quickly began turning over your covers and throwing the pillows onto the floor. Nothing. You dropped to the ground and peered under your bed to a shocking sight. You gasped.

Keekee somehow found her way into your room. And what was in her mouth other than your little Lucifer doll.

"Keekee," you called to her. "I'm gonna need that back, sweetie! That's not a toy!" Your hand reached out slowly, trying not to spook the little cat. Her tail whipped back and forth as she raised her hind legs. "Nooooooo, don't you dare Keekee, I swear I'll..." but before you could finish your threat, she bolted from under your bed and ran straight out of your room. "Damn it!"

You didn't have time to change and in that moment you didn't care. You flung the door wide open and watched Keekee turn the corner, the doll still in her tiny mouth. "Keekee, get back here!" you yelled down to her as quietly as you could. You didn't know what time it was but it was too early to be cursing at a cat. She scurried away into another hall, forcing you to chase after her. You never lost sight of her, which you thought was a little odd. Normally Keekee could disappear if she really wanted to, but at no point did she ever make an attempt to avoid you completely. It was almost like she wanted you to follow her.

After several crazy turns, you saw her duck into and open door in one of the hallways. You figured it must be a closet. She was finally trapped. You hurried over to the dark room and pushed the door shut so the cat couldn't escape easily. But now you couldn't see.

"Keekee, come here girl," you cooed. "I promise I'm not mad, I just want the doll back." You found it a little ridiculous that you were trying to barter with a cat, but it was early in the morning and your hadn't fully woken up yet. "This isn't funny anymore, you know. Please, Keekee, I need that back!"

"And why would that be?" a low voice boomed in the dark. You shrieked as the lights flashed on. After blinking a few times trying to get your eye to readjust, you realized where you ended up.

Lucifer's workshop...with Lucifer sitting at his desk, Keekee snuggled in his lap.

Shit.

The first thing you could process was that you were still in your nightgown. Instinctively, you threw your hands over your chest in shock and embarrassment.

"Oh, God, I'm sorry!" Lucifer apologized, quickly covering his eyes with his forearm. "H-Here!" With a snap of his fingers, a giant blanket formed around you, covering you from head to toe. You gripped it tightly to keep in from falling off your shoulders. Lucifer peaked through his arm to make sure you were decent. "Sorry again, I should have realized you wouldn't have been dressed yet." You felt your cheeks burn as he spoke. He reached down to pet Keekee who had then dropped the doll into his other hand. "Such a good girl, Keekee!" he praised her, "who's a good girl? You are! Yes you are!" He looked back up at you and cleared his throat. Lucifer stood up from his chair while Keekee leaped onto the ground, curling up into a ball, and taking a little nap under his desk.

You swallowed hard before finally finding your voice to speak. "L-Lucifer, I-I can explain! I-"

"It's alright," the fallen angel smiled. "I'm sorry about all this, but you've been avoiding me lately. I knew you'd follow Keekee once you realized she stole this from you." He held out the doll in his hand. "You made this?"

You nodded your head, refusing to make any sort of eye contact. "It was meant as a gift for you. The duck you gave me was amazing, I wanted to give you something in return, but..." you couldn't bring yourself to finish your sentence. Lucifer continued to smile softly at you. This was definitely not the reaction you were expecting from him. You had so many questions and so many apologies to give him, but there was one burning question that you needed answered first. "Did you know something like this was possible?"

Lucifer shook his head. "No, I didn't. One of my feathers is in this, right?" You nod. "It must still contain its magic despite not being attached to me anymore."

Your eyes shifted to the ground. "How did you know it was me?"

"I heard you." You raised your eyebrow, not understanding his answer. "I heard your voice. Anytime you held the doll, I heard you, as if you were whispering in my ear. At first, I didn't recognize it. But as you kept talking, the words you were saying; it all clicked. I've been trying to get your attention these last few days but you ran as soon as you saw me. Were you...afraid that I would be angry?"

You nodded again, tears now welling up in your eyes. "I-I'm sorry, Lucifer, I didn't mean to...I just..."

"Hey, hey! Please don't cry! Please?" Lucifer quickly wiped away the tears that fell down your cheek. "I'm not angry, I promise! I'm the furthest thing from it!"

You sniffled a few times, trying to even out your breathing again. "You...You're not? But why?"

Lucifer looked down at the doll in his hand and sighed. "Because...I haven't felt that kind of care in a long time. " He gently ran his hands over the small striped undershirt of the tiny Lucifer. "Hehe, it feels weird when I do it..." He looked back up at you with the most needy eyes you've ever seen. "I should have talked to you immediately after I figured out what was going on. I should have made more of an effort. But I didn't. I know that's selfish of me. But...I was afraid if I did, you would stop. Every time I tried to talk to you, you ran. And I was silently grateful that you did. It meant I would get to feel that same feeling of being held again that night. When you said that last night would be the final time, I knew I had to come clean. I couldn't let you go on thinking that what you were doing was wrong. I hope you can forgive me."

He was apologizing to you? When you were the one that made this magical doll and refused to tell him about it? "You have nothing to be sorry for, I created this, and I didn't tell you what was happening when I learned what I'd done. This is my fault."

"Can I see your hand?" Lucifer asked, almost as if he was ignoring the blame you were putting on yourself. You did as he asked and outstretched your hand. He placed the doll flat in your palm. "You're very skilled, you know. You did a wonderful job capturing my good side," he chuckled. "I know this was originally meant for me, but I want you to keep it. What you do with it is up to you." You remained perfectly as he spoke. "If you want to forget that this ever happened, I would completely understand. You can put it on a shelf or hide it in a closet, and this will never be brought up again." His palms rested on top of the doll and the bottom of your hand. "But..." his grip tightened ever so slightly, his claws digging into the fabric.

"You don't want that, do you?" his thoughts leaving your mouth. Lucifer didn't respond, he didn't even look up as you asked him.

That was all the answer you needed.

You pulled away and hid the doll under your blanket, giving him a soft smile. "I'll keep it...you safe. I promise. If it's what you really want."

"I do." The king couldn't help but beam at you. He wrapped his arms around you, constricting your own. He pulled away once he realized how hard he had been squeezing you. "Sorry," he laughed lightly. "Umm, by the way, i-if you ever need me, you can use the doll to talk to me if I'm not around. It can be about anything..." he leaned in closer and closer to you until you felt the light brush of his lips against your cheek. "And I do mean anything. I don't want to, you know, assume anything, but there had to be a reason why you went to bed with the doll every night. Some of the things you said...it sounded like you had more that you wanted to say. I just don't want you to be afraid. We're friends after all, right?"

Your heart was beating out of your chest as you listened to his words. You tried to speak but only air left your lips. Lucifer only giggled as you watched his cheeks turn a pale yellow. You couldn't believe what he was inferring. it couldn't be possible. And yet here you were with Lucifer himself practically begging for more of your attention.

"I...I don't know what to say," you finally managed to choke out. "This is all a little overwhelming, Lucifer."

"Then don't say anything," Lucifer responded. "Take all the time you need. I hope to see you soon," With a snap of his fingers, you were engulfed in sparkling red flame. You shielded your eyes for a brief moment. But after opening them again, you found yourself back in your bedroom. You walked over to your open door and quietly closed it, sinking to the floor afterwards. There was a lot you needed to process. The blanket that covered you fell to the floor as you ogled at the doll in your hand.

You hugged it tighter than you ever had before.

****

The rest of the day was perfectly quiet, mostly because you did see Lucifer for the rest of it. You cautiously approached Charlie and asked about him. She let you know that her dad told her he needed his privacy today and that no one should worry. Her words didn't comfort you like you hoped they would. Was Lucifer okay? Did this whole ordeal cause him to isolate himself. Did he change his mind about it? Your heart sunk at the thought. You needed to talk to him again, but you weren't sure you could face him. But...there was another option.

Later that night, you threw on your robe to get ready for a nice long bath. After the day you had, you needed it. You glanced over at the little stuffed doll sitting on your night stand, now hearing your own heartbeat in your ears. It was now or never; you wouldn't let your nerves get the better of you anymore. You took a hold of it and sat down on your bed, now extra aware of your hand movements.

"Lucifer, can you hear me?" You asked. There was no response. "I guess that was a stupid question. Hey, umm, I wanted to thank you. For today, I mean. I was so afraid that this situation would sully our friendship so badly that you'd never want to talk to me again. I hope you're doing alright. And I hope Keekee's teeth didn't hurt you too badly. I'm rambling now, aren't I?" In that moment, you could almost hear Lucifer's laugh.

The grip on you had on it tightened ever so slightly as you gathered the courage for what you really wanted to say. "You were right before. When you thought I had more to say to you. I-I did. But I didn't know how you would take it if I ever told you. I was afraid of your reaction. And your rejection. But...I don't have the strength to tell you in person." You brought the doll closer to your face, your lips ghosting over the fabric. "I love you," you whispered before planting a small peck to its small cheek.

Silence.

Your breath heaved slightly before setting the doll back down. You closed your eyes and let out a heavy sigh. It was done. There was nothing more you can do. You stood up and headed straight for the tub. You needed that bath now more than ever.

Knock knock knock

You froze in place for a few seconds, a little bit frightened by the sudden noise that emanated from your bedroom door.

Knock knock knock knock knock

The knocking on the door became more eager. You hurried over to answer after waiting a little too long to answer. Silently, you opened the door.

Lucifer was standing there in the hallway with the brightest smile.

"I love you too. I only wish you would have told me sooner," the ruler of Hell whispered as he gripped your hands. "Because then I could have done this!"

With little warning, Lucifer brought his lips to yours. You sat there in shock, eyes wide, before quickly succumbing to his temptations. You let your eyes lids fall as you wrapped your arms around the back of his neck, pulling him closer while his hands found your waist. A delicate kiss to your soft lips, over and over he lightly parted his own as he continuously nipped at you. He pulled away, staring back with his half-lidded eyes. You could have sworn he was drunk of the kiss the way his face formed into a goofy grin. He giggled just a little before widening his eyes in shock and stepping away.

"I'm sorry! I don't know how I keep catching you at the worst times!" he exclaimed now looking at the ceiling to avoid your gaze. You realized what had caused him to get so flustered. You looked down and remembered that you were in your robe.

And only your robe.

You blushed hard, not being able to stop yourself from laughing. "No, no, it's okay! This one's on me, I shouldn't have called you dressed like this."

"But you didn't know I was going to pop over here! My fault, I don't wanna hear any 'buts'!" Lucifer turned his head to the side still doing his best not to look at you.

"Well, I was just getting ready for a bath..." you began.

"O-Oh, yeah, of course! No worries! I really should have thought this through, I just got really excited and I...Anyway! We can talk about this tomorrow! So, I'll just be-"

"My bath is big enough for two." You blurted out without thinking.

At that moment, you could hear a pin drop. What was only a few moments felt like an eternity of silence. Your first instinct was to shut the door and lock it as fast as possible, but your body refused to budge. You just stood there horrified at the words that had escaped your mouth.

Lucifer wasn't faring much better. You watched his whole face turn a bright yellow that spread rapidly over his painted cheeks. And...was he shaking?

"I don't know why I said that," you mumbled almost incoherently. "if you need me, I'll be drowning myself now." You began to close the door before Lucifer caught it.

"I don't want you to drown," he spoke softly with just a hint of humor in his voice. "I better stay to make sure you're safe."

His words shot threw you like an arrow and your body instinctively opened the door once more to let your visitor in. The implications of his acceptance of your accidental offer crashed over you as soon as Lucifer closed the door behind him. He gave you a sheepish smile, his face's yellow tint had yet to rescind.

"I-I'll uhh, I'll draw the bath then," you squeaked and scurried over to the bathroom without another word. You tossed a towel for him onto your bed and hid yourself in the next room as the water began to fill the tub. You felt as though you could pass out at any moment; the crushing anxiety mixed with your burning desire to be as close to him as physically possible was a terrifying yet tantalizing feeling. To counter your worry, you grabbed some bottled soap from the counter and mixed it in with the steaming water, creating thousands of little white bubbles that threatened to spill over onto the floor. You would worry about any mess made later; right now, you wanted to savor this moment as much as you possibly could. Disrobing, you stepped into the now full tub and sunk down into the soothing water. Your heart was still beating a mile a minute but the water did half a sort of calming effect on you.

Knock knock knock

Well, that didn't last long.

"May I join you now?" Lucifer's muffled voiced called out.

A few quick deep breaths later, you cleared your throat, praying your voice wouldn't reveal how utterly stressed you were. "Y-Yes, come in!" Perhaps a poor choice of words, but you didn't have time to think about that when you caught your first glimpse of a nearly naked Lucifer. His alabaster skin looked as if he had been carved from the finest marble, his shoulders were broad compared to his relatively slim physique. Your eyes trailed to his blackened arms and hands that perfectly contrasted the rest of his skin. He was the epitome of perfection. The man closed the door behind him and made his way over to you.

"H-Hi," Lucifer stuttered.

"Heeeyyyyy there..." you rolled your eyes. "Listen, we can agree this is just a little awkward, right?"

Lucifer chuckled. "Maybe just a little bit. How's the water?"

"Join me and see for yourself! I'll just umm..." you turned your head and covered the side of your face with your hand, assuring you wouldn't see anything once he removed his towel.

"I'm not shy, hon." You just knew if you turned around, he would have the most prideful smirk on his face.

"You should get in before I change my mind," you playfully shot back.

You heard his towel hit the floor immediately. A fiery heat burned your core as the water shifted when he made his way in the tub. You closed your eyes for good measure so that you wouldn't be tempted to make this even more awkward than it already was. As soon as the water stopped moving, you took that as a sign that it was safe to look again. You turned your head to see Lucifer was sitting back against the other side playfully running his hands through the soapy bubbles that were floating on the surface.

"I love the bubbles, a very nice touch!" he commented.

"Thanks," you murmured. "You're sitting the wrong way though."

"Huh?"

"W-Well," you cleared your throat, "how am I supposed to clean you if you’re sitting so far away?"

"Oh...oh! Yeah, you're right!" Lucifer quickly spun his body around, his back now facing you. You spread your legs wider for him to scoot up closer to you, but he remained closer to the center of the tub. "Is this better?"

"Still a little too far..." The time for embarrassment had long gone. You grabbed a hold of Lucifer's hips and brought his body nearly flush between your thighs, earning a yelp from the startled angel. "What happened to not being shy, hmm?" you taunted. You could have sworn a little whimper escaped his throat.

Despite its frigid appearance, his body was warmer than you expected. You didn't let your hands linger on his waist for too long nor did you want to think about how his ass was mere inches away from your yearning womanhood. You forced yourself out of the trance and instead grabbed the washcloth and body soap from the small table and began to pour some of the liquid into the small towel, rubbing it between your fingers. "You promise to tell me if this becomes too much?"

Lucifer turned his head with a soft look on his face. "I promise that it won't be." You hummed, slowly bringing the cloth to his skin. He shuddered from the contact.

"Are you alright, Lucifer?"

He exhaled deeply. "I'm alright. More than alright! I'm just...really enjoying this. Thank you..."

You didn't waist anymore time scrubbing the rest of his back clean. Moving to his shoulders, down each arms, then reaching around the front to get to his chest. Without realizing, your head found its way to one of his shoulders, your chin resting comfortably. A soft sigh left your lips.

"Hey, uhh, y-you're going a little low there..." Lucifer said, his voice snapping you out of your haze. Your hand somehow drifted below the water and ended up resting on his lower stomach. Once you realized where you were heading, you pulled your arms away immediately.

"Sorry!" you nearly shouted. "I-I wasn't paying attention! Shit, I'm sorry!"

Lucifer shifted again, now facing you and gave you a small peck. "Sweetheart, it's alright, really! You don't need to apologize." Lucifer took the rag from your hand and made his way back to where he first started against the other side of the tub. "Here, let me return the favor. It's your turn now." With mild hesitation, you accepted his help wordlessly, turning your back to him as he did for you. Afraid of getting any closer, you stopped before any noticeable contact had been made. "I need you closer, dear," he whispered in your ear before pulling you against his chest with minimal effort.

You felt everything in that moment; his hands resting on your hips, his hot breath against your sensitive skin, and most distracting of all, his very noticeable hard on against the small of your back. It took everything you had to not scream like you wanted to. Knowing that this perfect creator was turned on by you made your heart flutter like a butterfly. Your body begged your to shift, if only a little bit, just to feel him rub against you. But you fought it against it furiously, digging your finger into the sides of his thighs to keep yourself grounded. The way your body tensed caused Lucifer to push you away from him slightly.

"Too much?" he asked, concerned that he may have crossed a line.

"No." you shook your head. You pushed yourself back against him, the friction sending a shiver up your spine. The low moan from Lucifer was magical, almost hypnotic. You needed to hear more. But before you could shift again, you felt the soft texture of the washcloth against your back.

"Good," his voice causing goosebumps to form on your arms, "now let's get you clean." He mimicked your movements, gliding the cloth against your soft skin, starting from the top and working his way down methodically. He moved to your shoulders, first the left and the right. Every muscle in your body just wanted to relax into him; you only wanted to float in this water with him for the rest of the night. But you were snapped out of your daydream when you noticed his movements had stopped. You looked down and saw his hand resting on your collarbone. It took only a moment to realize why the devil himself became a statue.

Lucifer swallowed hard behind you. "Am I allowed to...can I...?"

With a small giggle, you took the cloth from his hand and tossed it to the ground. Pulling your hands out of the water, you guided his own hands to your breasts. Lucifer gasped lightly but didn't pull away once your released his hands. His claws felt so nice on your bare skin that you let out a gasp of your own. "I think we're past the point of modesty, Lucifer. Go ahead, I-I want you to touch me."

Your permission was all he needed. Within a second, the king of Hell began to massage your breasts with the most delicate of touches, kneading them like fresh dough. His mouth sank down onto your pulse, sucking on it feverishly. A small whimper escaped your throat as he began to roll your nipples between his fingers. The man was intoxicated and you were the cause.

"You're too good to me, you know that?" he breathed against your skin. "Do you know how long I've wanted to tell you how beautiful you are? How enchanting? How irresistible?" One of his hands made its way down your side to your hip, sinking beneath the water and resting on your inner thigh. "To hold you like this is a dream come true."

"Lucifer, please..." you begged. Your hand found his once more and guided it down to where you needed him most. Once his fingers reached your folds, you couldn't help but whimper. In no time, he began circling your clit gingerly while his other hand worked at your breast. It was too much and not enough at the same time. You opened your legs as wide as your tub would allow to give him more access to your needy hole.

"Tell me what you want, love," he whispered in your ear. "Just say the word and it's yours."

"Touch me..." you pleaded.

You felt a finger slip into you effortlessly, a broken moan falling from your lips. You turned your head and crashed your lips into his, your desire for him only growing with every passing second. Another one of his fingers slid into you, his digits gliding in and out of your pussy with ease. He moaned into your mouth as he continued to pump his digits into your cunt, his pace increasing slowly with every movement.

"Need more of you..." he pleaded. "Please..." His fingers refused to let up. The coil in your stomach was growing tighter and tighter. You cried out in pure elation when you felt the coil finally give way, cumming hard and pulsing around his fingers that had yet to slow down. Once you could breathe normally against, he at last retreated his fingers from you, giving you a small peck on your forehead.

"T-Thank you," you mumbled out. "I think we're both pretty clean now, wouldn't you say."

"I'd say your right," Lucifer agreed. In a flash, Lucifer managed to stand up and scoop you up effortlessly as if you weighed nothing. You let out a small yelp when he picked you up and set you down on the bathroom floor, retrieving a towel from the nearby rack and sliding it up and down your body before using it on himself. "But I think this is all for naught," he continued as he guided you back to your bed, "because I think we may need another bath, I'm afraid."

He laid you down and quickly shoved his heads between your legs. You realized what he was about to do and sat up before he could go any further. "Wait, wait, hold on now!" Lucifer's eyes looked back at you with concern. "I don't think this is fair! What about you? I haven't even touched you yet!"

Lucifer gaze softened. "Oh, hon, I appreciate it but you don't have to worry about me! I-I'm fine, really! I just...I really need to taste you... Please, I'll do anything!"

You closed your legs and folded your arms over your chest, earning a tiny whimper from the man in front of you. "I seem to recall that I could have anything I wanted," you teased. Lucifer nodded and stuck out his lower lip to pout. You rolled your eyes and smiled, crawling over to him. "I have an idea. But you need to lay down for me. Can you do that?"

He did as you said almost instantly, his head hitting the back of the pillows with a soft thud. At this point you couldn't help but stare at his twitching cock. It was beautiful; thicker and longer than you might have expected from someone of his stature. Not that you would ever complain. You had to hold yourself back from letting out a whine that threatened to make you sound even more pathetic. You closed your eyes and crawled over the devil beneath you. You leaned down to kiss him again, his tongue not holding back from pushing through your lips and entangling it with yours. You pulled away and smiled unabashedly at him, admiring his perfect face and his insanely adorable blush. Without a word, you turned your body so your pussy hovered inches away from his mouth.

"S-Shit..." you heard Lucifer mutter under his breath. Knowing you had this much of an effect on him gave you the confidence you needed to grab ahold of his aching member. Lucifer couldn't help but cry out.

"This way we both get what we want," you told him before giving his tip a tiny little kitten lick. The precum from his shaft had already begun spilling onto your hand; you couldn't help but grin. "Someone is needyyyyYYYY F-FUCK!"

Lucifer pulled your hips down onto his face without warning, his tongue working at your slick cunt like a man starved. HIs claws dug into the sides of your body, the pain mixing with the undeniable pleasure his mouth gave you. Not to be outdone, you sunk your mouth down on his cock, licking and sucking at the tip. Lucifer moaned into your pussy at the feeling of your tongue. Both of your lust-filled sounds filled your room as you each sought to bring the other to their climax. You wouldn't let him win. You couldn't.

Your head bobbed up and down his girthy shaft over and over, taking in as much of him as you could. But with your growing pace came Lucifer's own counter move as his forked tongue pushed even further into you than you thought possible. You were both coming undone impossibly fast. Even with your head fuzzy from the tantalizing feeling of his mouth, your hand and mouth worked together in tandem to push him over the edge. Lucifer cursed against your skin as you felt his hot cum finally fill your waiting mouth. But it only took him a few seconds more to bring you to another orgasm after he begun to tease your clit over and over and over, refusing to give you any sort of reprieve.

You swallowed as much of his as you could before letting go of his cock with a satisfying pop with some of his release dripping down towards your chin. You wiped your fingers against the remains and made sure he watched as you licked them clean. Something in Lucifer must have snapped because the next thing you knew, you had been flipped down onto the mattress with your wrists pinned at your sides. You blinked and stared up into Lucifer now glowing red eyes; his. His demonic horns had burst from his temple, his angelic wings appeared and began flapping behind him, and his tail whipped back and forth before coiling itself around your waist. You gulped, your pussy begging to be filled by the man above you.

"Sorry," Lucifer apologized. "I got a little too excited there." He freed your hands and brought them down to your hips. "D-Do you want to keep going? We can stop if this is too much and-"

You cut him off with a soft kiss to his lips. "It's alright, Luci. I want this. I want you."

Lucifer smiled and kissed you again, stroking his still hard cock in the process. When he pulled away, you felt the tip graze your slick folds. That feeling alone was enough to make you shudder with anticipation. With final nod from you, Lucifer at last began to sink into you. You winced at the pain you felt as your body forced itself to stretch for him until he finally bottomed out inside of you. The pain slowly faded as he waited patiently, smiling at you the entire time.

"Y-You can move now," you squeaked out.

Lucifer nodded, shifting his hips just enough to pull out of you almost all the way before thrusting back in, earning a wanton moan from you. He started slow for you, knowing his size was a bit much to handle. But as your body relaxed, his picked up the pace. Faster and faster until both of you were complete and utter moaning messes.

"F-Fuck...feel so good, love," Lucifer sighed as his wings began to twitch. "S-So good. So perfect...I'm really happy y-you made that doll. I-I know everything didn't go exactly as planned but...GAAHHH FFFFUCK...I think it all turned out f-for the better, don't you think?"

Your moans turned into giggles as he continued to rut into you relentlessly. "You're s-such a dork," you laughed as your legs wrapped around him to force him to keep him as deep inside you as possible.

"B-But I'm your dork," he joked back. "Sorry love, but you're stuck with m-me now!"

"G-Good," you responded breathlessly, his hips thrusting into you even faster than before. "Then we c-can be dorks together!"

"P-Perfect!" Your cunt sucked in his cock as you felt the coil in your stomach tightening again. By the noises he was making, you can only assume Lucifer was almost at his limit too. "Darling...c-can't...I'm close...f-fuck...where-"

"Inside!" you screamed. "FuckfuckfuckFUCK LUCIFER!" Your orgasm hit you like a freight train, your wanton cries echoing off the corners of your room. It only took a few more thrusts for Lucifer to follow suit and spill his seed inside of you, his cum painting your walls a pearlescent white was he pulled you in close for another passionate kiss.

The king crashed on top of you after pulling out of you, his unearthly features retreating except for his tail which remained firmly wrapped around you. You smiled as he laid his head on your chest, his breathing labored and shaky. You stroked his soft blond hair as he hummed in approval. He looked up at you with adoring eyes and stuck out his snake-like tongue.

"What's that look for?" you asked him.

"Oh nothing," Lucifer sighed, "I'm just looking at the prettiest woman in all of Hell is all!"

You pushed his face away and laughed. "Yep, still a dork."

"But you love me!" he said gleefully, rolling onto the bed and pulling you into a tight embrace.

"I do, I really do. I wish I would have told you sooner."

Lucifer kissed the top of your forehead. "Don't worry, hon, I know now. And that's all that matters. Besides, I finally get to hold you now! And wow, does it feel like heaven!"

You buried your face in his chest and squeezed him tight. "Well, I can say for certain that you feel much better than the doll. Would you...like to stay over tonight?"

"Of course I would love," he spoke softly. "I have you in my arms now, and I don't intend on ever letting you go."

~~~~

THIS TOOK WAY TOO FUCKING LONG, I HOPE YOU LIKE IT ANYWAY!!!!!!!!!!!

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@bat-boness @myhornybrainonlyknowsthis @misfitgirlwrites @animationmovieshipps @orbitinglumps

@ramenkitten @blaackbiird @bigfatbimbo @lucisaspen @pvppybun

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#hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin lucifer #lucifer smut #lucifer x reader #my writing #FUCK ME WHY DID THIS TAKE SO LONG #ENJOY!!!

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vaelynx · 11 hours ago

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Their solution to "end the war in Ukraine" is to withdraw aid and allow Russia to invade. It's literally pro-Genocide. So we're already starting out with the dumbest take possible. Not looking good for you.

Yeah, I think I know what to expect here now and it certainly is nothing smart. But, let's start. There is no genocide happening in Ukraine now, there is *war*, and in fact, genocide wasn't happening even before the war started. What however happened was military action by AFU aimed against the civillian residents of Doneck and Lugansk people's republics, ignoring the ceasefire and Minsk agreements as a whole - so Russia rendered them aid, which they asked for, striking against the illegitimate Kyjev government in defense of their self-determination and in protection of their citizenry.

And if you point out that it is nations, not nationalities that have a right of self-determination, well, that used to be true before what happened with Kosovo, so it is very much your precedent Russia made use of.

Try again.

Tariffs are just going to make things more expensive for the working class and no one else. That manufacturing isn't coming home. It'll just move to countries other than China where it's still more profitable for major corporations and the supply chain.

Where have I heard this stupid argument last. Oh wait, all the neoliberal think-tanks. In fact, this is a rehash of the already idiotic argument against increasing the minimum wage, tooted by all the neoliberal think-tanks. Let's examine why it doesn't work.

a) The government can go around increasing tariffs against specific goods (it's easy if, at the moment, the countries in question aren't actually exporters, to prevent a *subsequent* move) right until the aforementioned countries run out of cheap labour to exploit.

b) Things aren't going to get significantly more expensive for the working class for the same reason minimum wage hikes don't lead to that. You see, if the corporations felt they could hike up their prices and make a greater profit that way, *they already would have*. Taking the cost of materials and manufacture and slapping a profit margin on top is how prices are generated in a socialist economy, not in capitalism, and this is a textbook example of demagogy - advancing a fallacious argument, not because the originator is fooled but because he believes his audience is.

c) Allowing manufacturing to depart abroad in the first place was perhaps the worst decision anyone could have taken as it neatly hollowed out US economy and is the very reason the working class has been pauperized and can't afford anything but the cheapest, which creates a vicious circle that you can't get out of without government intervention. And, again, Vance has correctly pointed this out.

Look, I can break this down further, but it's clear we're dealing with someone who has fallen down right wing talking points so badly that any discussion is useless. They think the GOP, the party where folks want to remove bodily autonomy and are mad about women voting, is somehow "left."

Nah, we're dealing with someone who isn't blinded by party slogans. And uh, don't get me started on bodily autonomy because weren't the democrats pushing for vaccine mandates *on an experimental product that was repeatedly lied about*? Doesn't sound like bodily autonomy at all. Furthermore, all I've seen from the GOP on a federal level is allowing states to decide on the matter, which strikes me as something which should be true on as many topics as possible in the first place

Finally, yes, I think the current presidential candidate and his crew are more left-wing than the democrats, since they're the only ones remotely circling around the idea of doing things to benefit the working class, and to rein in the big business that has been writing US policy up to now. They're not *very* left-wing, but distinctly more so than the wing of corporate democrats represented by Kamala, Biden, Clintons etc.

Leftists don't win by allowing extreme right wing candidates to win the White House. Instead you keep pressuring Democrats during their term and it works. Like Biden is continuing to work on forgiving student debt even though he doesn't have an election ahead of him.

Don't be absurd. Biden touted a student loan forgiveness plan before the last election, then plain out said he's not going to forgive any student loans and sent tons of money into Ukraine instead (which flowed mostly back in to the military-industrial complex, and to democrat kickbacks) and he's suddenly working on it again, with earliest mentions being like, eight months before the election. They say fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me, and this is basically a showcase for this principle.

We know it works because that's exactly what the Republicans have been doing for 50 years.

Well... that's the thing. Democrats sabotaged Bernie Sanders, then, after an election failure, ended up, among other things, bringing in a couple actually left figures into the forefront... then for Biden's VP chose the candidate literally nobody wanted (based on her performance in the primaries) and now used a sleight-of-hand to give her the nomination without primaries. If you think this is a party that is interested in your opinion any... my condolences.

And don't listen to weirdos who try to tell you Donald "Finish the Job" Trump and JD "Incel Couchfucker" Vance are somehow leftist.

*applauds* I knew you weren't smart, but ending the post with a personal attack (and an incredibly unimaginative, DNC-prescribed one to boot), which also somehow includes calling a married guy with kids an "incel" shows that you're a plain idiot. Thank you for broadcasting it to the world, saves me some typing.

This is the thing with the "I won't vote for Harris" supposed leftists.

None of them will tell you how allowing Trump to be elected helps.

Because they don't have an answer.

Because they don't really care about anything other than how they personally feel.

Actual leftism involves making pragmatic moves. The public will for revolution doesn't exist, and we live in a two party system. If you want to fight that system, great. There are things like ranked choice voting and the National Popular Vote Interstate Compact we need to be fighting for. But those are fights that have to happen year round, at the state level, and not just in an election year.

And in the meanwhile, you vote defensively and strategically, in an attempt to save as many people as possible.

Saying you aren't voting for Harris isn't taking a stand against genocide. It's putting your head in the sand and admitting you care more about your own comfort than making a difference in the world.

Why aren't you getting involved in your local politics? Why aren't you running leftist candidates at a local level, so you can move them up in the system and eventually move the political discussion left. You want to know why politics have moved right? It's because the right wing has been doing that for decades.

Your refusal to participate won't save a single life.

It only means you're abandoning everyone else.

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bodyswapmischief · 3 days ago

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Fractured Wishes: Bonded Minds

Every day that passes, I feel myself slipping away. I am more than myself now—I have to be. I need to be them and me, to somehow make us whole. But where do I end, and where do they begin? It was all so clear at the start of this, but now the line blurs a little more every day. Was I ever really me? Or am I one of them, trying to lead myself toward a better life? I regret not realizing what I had... because now, it’s all I have. I messed up. I owe them everything. I owe them this life.

My name was—and sometimes still is—Henry. And, honestly, I hated my friends. We were those friends from childhood, the kind you feel obligated to keep around. By high school, we mostly hung out outside of school. Maybe it was because we all lived on the same block our whole lives. But high school tested the limits of our friendship.

We were close, especially in elementary and middle school. But by high school, we’d all changed. Puberty blessed Michael; he grew tall and strong. It was no surprise he became a jock, balancing parties, sports, and schoolwork with ease. He wasn’t a typical meathead either. He’d always try to get Nathan and me to come to those parties with him.

I understood Nathan. But me... Nathan didn’t have Michael’s build, but he was ridiculously attractive. His family life was tough, so he had that bad-boy edge—the leather jacket, the mystery, the kind of “I could fix him” vibe every girl seemed drawn to. While Michael hung out with the golden kids, Nathan fell in with the party crowd. He drank and hooked up before any of us. He had this charisma.

So yeah, I get why Nathan and Michael were friends. But me? I was the weak, scrawny nerd. I tried a few parties but always ended up getting bullied. Then Nathan would get mad at Michael, and Michael would say he’d take care of it. The next day, I’d see some jock with a black eye. But really, it was obvious I didn’t belong with them. No matter how much they tried, it just never ended well for me.

And it wasn’t just the parties. They tried to associate with me at school, too. Why couldn’t they see it was only going to cause problems? Being nice to me just put a spotlight on me. Couldn’t they see it would’ve been better if we kept clear boundaries? At school, we were all different people. But back home, on our street, we could be friends—just like the old days, playing video games together. Though, with schoolwork and activities, even those hangouts became less and less frequent.

People always say college is different, that once you leave high school, everything changes, that it gets better. But when the time came to apply to college, to finally be free, they still had their claws in me. Sitting at the lunch table, they suggested we all choose the same school. I felt my heart sink. Why would they do this to me? Why couldn’t they see I didn’t belong with them? I couldn’t say no, but I threw out my safety school. I was counting on getting accepted somewhere else, somewhere I knew they wouldn’t apply. But fate is cruel—the only acceptance letter I got was from my safety school. And just like that, I was trapped with them, even in college.

That’s when I knew. They didn’t like me. Their kindness was just a cover for their true cruelty. They hated me—they knew they were better than me and enjoyed keeping me around as the weak friend, someone to make them look good. But I was too weak to confront them, so I played my role. They’d invite me out, and it made me sick. How could two people be so cruel, to keep someone around just to make them feel inferior? I couldn’t face their malice head-on. But I could say no. And that’s exactly what I did—I started turning down their invitations. I spent more time in my dorm. Making new friends felt pointless; it would just end up the same way.

And then it happened. Mr. Cool Guy and Mr. Popular were supposed to leave me alone. It was the big party weekend to celebrate the end of mid-term. I’d already said no; I wasn’t going with them. I was ready to relax, spend the night by myself, and enjoy some movies and TV. But then there was a knock on my door. Nathan and Michael were standing there with pizza, movies, and games. I was furious. How could they do this? They told me they’d been worried about me, that I’d been distant. Parties could wait, they said. They realized they’d been trying to make me join in on their kind of fun and thought maybe they should try mine instead. Those idiots, I thought. Couldn’t they see—I didn’t even like them! But I let them in, and we started hanging out.

Their attempts at having a good time ... I snapped. I saw the truth and exploded on them. I confronted them, and they acted confused, mad, and sad that I felt the way I did. They tried to explain, insisting they truly saw me as a friend. Nathan wished I could understand that they had always considered me one. Michael said he’d always hoped we’d stay in each other’s lives. I couldn’t take their lies anymore. In that moment, I wished they’d both just drop dead.

A wave of energy ripped through the air, and the power went out. I heard two bodies hit the floor. With a flicker, the lights came back on—and there lay Nathan and Michael.

I rushed to Michael and placed my hand on his chest, feeling his heartbeat beneath my palm. I quickly moved to Nathan, doing the same, and I could sense his heartbeat as well. I had no idea what had happened to them, but I cursed the fact that it had to occur in my dorm. They were alive, at least, but I needed them awake and out of my life. Grabbing Michael’s hand, the world around me spun. When it finally stopped, I felt heavy yet powerful, as if the world had shrunk around me. Looking down, I saw my unconscious body on the floor, and in shock, I jumped back.

I kneeled down and felt my heart. It was still beating. And, then I grabbed my hand. The words spun, and I was back in my body. I did the same with Nathan. Touching his exposed flesh, I was wisked into his body. I ran to the mirror and checked myself out. I couldn't believe it. I could have some fun while they were passed out. I could finally see what it would be like to be them. I could see why they felt the need to keep me around and torment me.

I slipped back into Michael's form and grabbed a blanket. Carefully wrapping the other two bodies, I placed one on the bed and the other on the couch, amazed at how easily I could carry them. My muscles flexed with each effortless movement, and I marveled at the strength I now possessed. As I took in this new body, I couldn’t ignore the raw sensations it brought with it. Curious to explore every part of it, I undressed and allowed myself a moment of self-discovery. I rubbed my hands down my current muscular frame. I felt the strength of this body with every involuntary flex caused my desperate desire. Each touch and movement felt both familiar and entirely new, heightening my awareness of this powerful, muscular form in a way that was deeply exhilarating. And, finally I wrapped my hands around my new raging cock.

As I finished palying with Michael's body, I couldn’t help but smile. I'd always been a bit jealous of him, and now, here I was, being him. I walked back into the room and looked at the other two bodies, wondering how long they'd remain unconscious. If they woke up, would we all be stuck in our new bodies? Based on who I was when I touched each of them, Nathan would likely be in my body, and Michael would now be Nathan. I could already imagine how mad Nathan would be with this arrangement.

I didn’t care because they both deserved to experience what it was like to be me after the way they'd treated me. The night was young, and there was a party to go to, a party where, for once, I’d finally fit in, not be the odd one out. I wouldn’t be the outsider that Michael and Nathan invited just for everyone to laugh at.

As those thoughts filled my mind, a memory surfaced: "Damn, man, that sounds good. I’ll bring some pizza and a few of my games. I’m worried about the guy, too. I think he misses home... maybe we can make it feel a bit more like home with one of our classic game nights. You’re right. There’ll always be other parties, but we’ve gotta help our bro out." This was Michael’s memory. Why did he say this to Nathan when I wasn’t around? Why did he sound like he actually cared?

Another memory played, "Hey Chad! What the hell? Why were you picking on Henry? Yeah, I’d rather sit with the “nerd” than with you guys at lunch… because he’s my friend. And who cares about high school reputation? I’ve got enough to go around because I’m a decent person. But if you mess with him again, you’ll see how “bad” I can get."

The first time Michael stood up for me... followed by a montage of others he’d defended me against, without me ever knowing. My heart sank. All this time… could it be? Maybe Michael really felt that way, but Nathan? I needed to know. I rushed back to my own body, touching my hand. Michael’s body slumped onto the bed as I shot up in my own form and hurried over to Nathan. I sat on the couch and touched his hand. Now, I was Nathan, and I had to know the truth.

I wasn't sure how easy it would be to summon these memories. With Michael, it just happened. But, I used every ounce of concentration i could muster, and the memories came. "Hey, I don't think we should go to the party tonight. Henry hasn't been doing well. You know how he is. He isn't gonna ask for help. We just gotta be there for him. Like we always have been." This memory was followed by a montage of all the times he would invite me to hang with him. A feeling that even if my ... his family life was falling apart he could hold on to his friends. The inspiration he got from me to still try in school. How he owed his passion to getting into college to me.

I felt a wave of nausea. All the terrible things I'd assumed about them were wrong. I returned to touch my original body, and Nathan's fell unconscious. Standing in the room, I looked down at my two friends, both still warm and breathing. I called out to them, but there was no response, no hint of waking. I threw a pillow and shook the bed and the couch, but nothing. I knew if I touched them, I’d risk swapping bodies again. Seconds stretched into minutes, then hours. They never woke up. Morning came, but they remained motionless.

I paced�� around the room. They were alive, but if they didn’t wake up, they’d eventually die. They needed to eat and drink, at the very least. And they each had lives, school, family, and other responsibilities. With a wave of guilt, I grabbed Michael’s hand and swapped into his body. Focusing, I saw his usual morning routine, his plans for the day. I prepared breakfast and ate for him. Then, I went to Nathan, swapping into his body to do the same. Thankfully, his breakfast was simple; he wasn’t as much of a health nut as Michael. I ate and thought through his tasks. There had to be a way to wake them. Until I could find it, or they managed to fight back into consciousness, I’d have to live for all three of us.

I started to plan how I’d manage everything the three of us needed to do. And it worked, I bounced between our bodies, keeping up with all the homework and classwork, making sure we ate and stayed clean. Being in their bodies was strange; I’d always found them both attractive. But guilt weighed on me, knowing I’d put them in this situation. It kept me from fully enjoying the experience. Still, I was in the bodies of three young men, full of energy and hormones, so, naturally, I had to take care of that too.

But I could only handle the basics for so long. Each of them had social lives to keep up with. Michael had practices; I managed to call him out sick for a week, but he needed that scholarship money. And then there was Nathan, with his friends constantly hitting him up, suspicious that I kept turning down plans. The only thing working in my favor was that I, my real self, didn’t have much of a life. Even so, I could see how my own few overlapping events would soon complicate everything.

I couldn’t do this alone. But I was. I needed to be more than just one of us at a time. The next morning, I woke up in my own body, grabbed both of Michael’s hands, and didn’t let go. I felt my soul bouncing between both bodies, the world spinning around me, but I held on until I couldn’t handle it any longer. I collapsed to the floor.

When I opened my eyes, I saw two views at once. The disorientation was overwhelming, an intense vertigo like I’d never felt. I began to gag as I sat up, seeing Michael’s body do the same through my eyes—and my own body doing it through Michael’s. I was in both bodies simultaneously, and each movement mirrored in both. Stumbling to the bathroom, I managed to get both bodies leaning over the bathtub as the nausea hit hard.

It took hours to leave the restroom, as every slight head turn made both bodies feel nauseous. Eventually, in both bodies, I stumbled as I guided us onto the bed. The world was still spinning, and all I could do was try to sleep, hoping it would get better.

More time passed, and I woke up again. Both bodies looked up, still feeling the vertigo—though it was now slightly more manageable. I sat up, glancing at both my bodies, each face reflecting a mix of confusion and astonishment. I reached out to touch Michael's face with one hand, and from Michael’s perspective, he was doing the same to my face. It was surreal, feeling the sensation of both our hands touching both our faces.

I began to move both bodies' hands, exploring further, curiosity getting the better of me, I grabbed both cocks. I felt this strange urge as both bodies reacted, becoming aroused. Suddenly, guilt washed over me, and I released my grip, quickly getting out of bed. This situation wasn’t as useful as I had hoped. Moving two bodies in perfect mirror of each other felt more like a hindrance than a help.

I thought it might be better if we were at least facing the same direction instead of each other. Standing face to face, I focused on Michael's body, trying to will it to turn around while keeping my own body facing forward. With some concentration, it worked. Now, instead of mirroring each other, both bodies were moving in unison.

I moved both bodies to the kitchen, but thinking about maneuvering two bodies was a bit complicated. I bumped into things and felt the pain of both bodies, though it was becoming easier. Another issue arose while I was cooking breakfast; one body was doing all the work while the other simply mimicked, holding imaginary objects. It felt like a waste of energy.

I began to wonder if there was a way to be in just one body again. I tried to touch Michael's body as his hand reached out to the other side of him, but it didn’t work. Then I concentrated on being in my own body, and I could feel a pericng sensation in my brain. I was seeing through one set of eyes and looked at Michael's body. He was still conscious, moving around and cooking. My heart jumped, I had done it; I had brought him back. But when I called out to him and tried to talk, he didn’t respond. I saw a blank look on his face as he moved on autopilot, focused on the last task I had been doing in his body.

I concentrated again, focusing on being Michael, and I felt my soul jump. I stopped mid-action while cracking eggs and looked at my original body just staring back at me. I began to think of a complicated list of tasks and then jumped out of Michael's body and into my own. From my own body, I watched Michael work. He cooked breakfast, cleaned up the mess, and served it. He started eating, and when he was done, he sat still. He had completed everything I had planned in his mind before I jumped out.

Finally, I thought to myself, this could work. I swapped back into Michael's body with just pure thought and began testing the distance. I moved farther away and left the dorm, and it seemed I could swap from any distance. Not only that, but the swaps were becoming easier, almost second nature. I started leaving a thought of acting naturally, and I could swap back while both bodies were in mid action, as if they were operating on their own without me.

I returned to the dorm in Michael's body and saw my original body moving around, getting ready for one of my late classes. I jumped as it began talking to me like myself. It seemed the thoughts I was leaving behind after each jump were becoming more polished, allowing both bodies to act completely normal whether I was in one of them or not.

As my body left the dorm on its own, I concentrated again, focusing on being in both bodies. My vision split once more, allowing me to see the dorm through Michael's eyes as my original body walked to class. I could seamlessly jump between the two, maintaining concentration on both, with each body providing me with information about both surroundings.

I concentrated again and closed the channel, finding myself back in Michael's body. But I continued to test my abilities. Opening the channel again, I saw through both perspectives. Then, I jumped into my own body. I would spend the day practicing this skill set. I swapped between both bodies: my original body attended class while Michael enjoyed some downtime playing video games. I practiced seeing through both sets of eyes simultaneously, and it was becoming easier.

As my original body walked back to the dorm from class, I felt incredible. I was two people at once. But then panic set in as I remembered Nathan. Both bodies turned to each other and said his name. Michael got up from the couch, and my original body dropped his backpack. We both rushed to Nathan, who was passed out on the bed. I had ignored him all day.

I made both bodies grab his hand, forming a chain between us. I could feel my soul jumping again. Nathan hadn’t been connected to us yet, so I held on until I couldn’t. Finally, he shot awake. I saw through his eyes as well as my own and Michael's. The vertigo didn’t bother me; I had become accustomed to seeing from multiple perspectives. Adjusting Nathan was easier thanks to all the practice I had.

Now, all three bodies moved independently. I could jump between them at will and focus on controlling all three simultaneously. I had essentially created a hive mind. I was myself, I was them, I was us. Every movement and action was coordinated through my connection to their memories, each of our experiences influencing the others. We were all learning from one another, our identities blending together. I made sure to preserve the essence of who they were at the core of their personalities, but it was challenging to distinguish where I began, and they ended—and vice versa. It was no longer useful to think of us as individuals; we were one. One personality split into three.

As Nathan, I learned to cut the toxic people out of his life and heal the pain of his broken family. I guided him away from a troubled path. As Michael, I became more than just brawn. He was always intelligent, but now I allowed that aspect of him to shine. I focused on sports while ensuring he had a backup plan in case that didn't work out. My original body, along with Nathan's, has benefited from gym tips, while my body and Michael's have embraced confidence and relationship advice. However, when you control three bodies, sometimes love can wait, as I've been enjoying what these three bodies experience together when I'm feeling the urge. I don't know if there’s a way to undo what I’ve done, but until an answer comes, I'm going to live for all of us.

#male body tf #body #swap #transformation #tf #male #mischief #stories #male body swap #male transformation #malebodyswapmischief #male possession #possession #hive mind

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sansaorgana · 3 days ago

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— DAUGHTER OF THE MOON (III)

PART ONE || PART TWO

PAIRING — Sauron x fem!Elf!Reader (Celebrimbor's Daughter)

SUMMARY — Lord Celebrimbor's daughter finally learns the truth about her betrothed. She might be the only one who can save her father and Eregion if she agrees to give Sauron what he wants.

AUTHOR’S NOTE — Reader's appearance is not described and her mother comes from a group of Elves that I came up with myself for the sake of this fic and its plot – the Moon Elves. This is the last part of this fic! 😊 As I said, it was supposed to be a one shot but it turned out quite long, so I decided to post it in three chapters. 💗 The ending is kinda open... 👀

WARNINGS — Reader's mother is dead ("madness" + suicide), blood magic, violence, domestic abuse (Sauron is not nice to his fiancée), manipulation, gaslighting

WORD COUNT — 6,450

ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.

DAUGHTER OF THE MOON (III)

Corruption. It was the thing that Lady (Y/N) feared the most. Therefore, when she heard about the possibility of The Seven being condemned because of her father’s lie to the High King, she was absolutely terrified. Especially after learning “the truth” from her beloved Annatar about her father’s condition.

He watched with a smirk, overhearing her conversations with Celebrimbor. Her pleas and sobs as she begged him to finish the Rings. But – just as she had promised – not even once she did reveal that she knew about his worrying state. And even though Annatar had mentioned that it was crafting the Rings that had caused Celebrimbor’s mind to go astray, his daughter feared the darkness and corruption so badly that it seemed to escape her mind. The only thing that mattered to her was to convince her father to help Annatar in making the Rings.

She was even using the same tactics as her beloved – something he noticed with a huge amount of satisfaction as he listened to her praising her father’s craft and saying that he would soon become known as the greatest of the Elves in history. How she sweetly and innocently lured him into the trap Annatar had prepared.

And so she succeeded, standing proudly by her betrothed’s side with her arm around his, as they were surrounded by the Elven smiths and watched Celebrimbor give a speech.

“There is agency uncanny in the heart of stone and ore,” he started. “Even when a work is yet within the artist's bosom, it begins to…” He hesitated and made a disappointed face. “...disobey him. We have failed. Every one of us,” he added more harshly now and Annatar could feel (Y/N)’s hands squeezing his arm tighter as she was not suspecting her father to grow so bitter and cold.

“The designs were carried out to the most exquisite detail, my Lord,” Mirdania dared to interrupt him.

“Were they?” Celebrimbor asked her in a challenging tone. “Every last hammer stroke done to perfection?” He began to take steps forward, approaching her and the other smiths. “Or did hubris and sloth come together to dull your attention?!” He raised his voice and a short silence occurred.

The tension was heavy in the forge and Annatar felt (Y/N)’s fingernails digging into his flesh as she kept squeezing his arm. Her father’s anger was not aimed at her but it still pained her to see him like this – like he had never been before.

“We must atone for our mistakes in the only way we can by completing the Rings together,” Celebrimbor said again, a bit softer this time, as he looked upon Annatar’s face. “The Nine must do far more than bring aid to men, they must bring balance to the entire project. They must draw strength from The Three and somehow…,” he hesitated, uncomfortably, “redeem The Seven,” he looked around, avoiding everyone’s gaze. “They must redeem us all. We shall work night and day,” his tone changed once again and grew harsher. “New designs. New alloys. A new process. I will be with you at every turn and any of you who offers so much as a hair’s breadth less than his utmost effort is a… A smith of Eregion no longer,” he threatened, even though he sounded ashamed of his own vicious words despite the gentle smile. “Have I made myself plain?”

“Yes, my lord,” the smiths nodded their heads quietly.

“It starts now,” Celebrimbor nodded nervously and walked away as fast as possible to go up to his study, walking past Annatar and (Y/N) but avoiding their gaze.

(Y/N) left her betrothed’s side and followed her father to his study. Annatar was torn whether he should join them or to coax the smiths. He eventually decided to do the other thing since he already trusted (Y/N) enough to leave her alone with Celebrimbor for a moment, meanwhile the smiths of Eregion kept chatting quietly about their Lord’s behaviour.

“Father?” (Y/N) approached Celebrimbor who was sitting on the chair and trembling, hiding his face in his hands. Her heart was full of pain for him and she swallowed thickly when she placed her hands on his shoulders as he flinched a little. “Father, perhaps I have been pushing you too hard to agree to make The Nine. I, too, want the redemption of The Seven for I want this craft to be the absolute mastery of your abilities and achievements as much as I want for the whole Middle-earth to admire you…” She confessed gently as she crouched down next to him and removed his hands softly from his face. “But father, please, the way you behave… is worrying to say the least,” she whispered.

“The way I behave, my sweet child?” He blinked a few times at her and she tilted her head, confused.

“What are you talking about?” She breathed out and a short silence occurred, in which Annatar’s voice calming down the smiths reached them from afar.

“Are you sure about wanting to marry this man?” Celebrimbor lowered his voice, squeezing his daughter’s wrist when she wanted to move away, visibly outraged by his question.

“How can you ask me that?! The love between Lord Annatar and I is of the purest and most noble kinds…” Her eyes filled with tears. “I have never thought to ever meet a man like him but he is everything I have ever dreamt of and I am the luckiest of all maidens that he wishes to leave his service to the Valar for me.”

Celebrimbor was defeated. He let his daughter's hand go and he watched her tears with the pain in his heart. He hated to make her cry and to worry her but he was concerned about her as well.

However, she was already far too bewitched by Annatar’s charm.

Lady (Y/N) was crafting a beautiful headpiece as she focused on shaping the sapphires. The day was warm and quite calm and she enjoyed her silence and her solitude as yet another masterpiece was coming to life because of the work of her hands.

A light knock upon the doors made her look up with a furrowed brow.

“Come in,” she ordered and watched the smith Mirdania walking inside.

Mirdania’s eyes were exhausted, her dress and face covered in sweat and dirt from the long days of excessive work in the forge. She bowed down in front of Lady (Y/N) and opened her mouth, hesitating before speaking.

“What is it?” (Y/N) asked her as she stopped paying attention and laid her eyes back on the headpiece in front of her.

“My Lady, I am terribly sorry for bothering you but this is about your father, Lord Celebrimbor…” Mirdania started.

“Yes?” (Y/N) still did not lay her eyes on the woman as her eyes squinted when she picked up a thin chisel.

“The way he is behaving… He has never been like this. I do not mean his strive for perfection but the measures he is taking… We do not feel safe around him anymore, my Lady,” Mirdania blushed and looked away because (Y/N) glanced at her at that very moment.

“I… I do not know what to say,” (Y/N) confessed, putting the chisel down. “I do not know how to comfort you… But you ought to endure for he must finish The Nine,” she stood up to approach Mirdania and put her hands around the smith’s arms. “He must.”

Mirdania tried to protest somehow as her mouth opened and her head shook but that was when the doors opened once more – this time without any knocking – and Lord Annatar stood in them.

He walked differently these days; more confidently. The way he stood there was taking up the whole door frame and the way he glanced at the women had a hint of contempt and suspicion in his eyes. His robes were no longer grey and humble but the most exquisite – black and gold. And some of his hair strands were tied in a whimsical bow to avoid getting into his eyes and interrupting his work.

Some were saying that now, when Lord Celebrimbor was so busy with his craft and Annatar was engaged to his daughter, he was carrying himself as the Lord Regent of Eregion in a way. His position changed, of course, as he was now known as Lady (Y/N)’s betrothed and Lord Celebrimbor’s most trusted friend.

“My love, what is it?” Lady (Y/N) asked as she abandoned Mirdania’s side immediately to approach him.

She did not mind his change – in fact, he made her believe that it was her who had encouraged it, convincing him that the new robes would make him seem more respectful amongst the people of Eregion and that he had proved his humility enough.

Annatar gave Mirdania a scolding look before laying his soft eyes upon Lady (Y/N).

“Your father’s people demand an audience but he refuses to see them, too occupied with his craft,” he announced.

“That is so unlike him,” (Y/N) shook her head with concern.

“He wants you and I to carry on with his responsibilities to the city,” Annatar informed her.

“Oh, well, then…” She hesitated. “Well, then I must… I shall do everything to help my father,” she nodded her head, eagerly. “Mirdania,” she turned around to look at the woman and the smith bowed her head down before hurrying out of Lady (Y/N)’s chambers.

(Y/N) and Annatar walked downstairs and approached the people gathered by the doors, surprised to see them instead of their Lord. Annatar clasped his hands behind his back and looked down at his betrothed as she nodded at him, letting him speak because she knew that he was far better with words than she was.

“The greatest of Elven smiths is consumed by his work,” Annatar announced to the people of Eregion. “He asks that Lady (Y/N) and I handle all matters of administration in his stead,” he bowed slightly at her before looking back at them. “Now, what seems to be at issue?”

One of the guards looked at Commander Malendrol with hesitation.

“Show them,” he said.

“Show us what?” Annatar asked and the guards pointed in the direction they wanted him and Lady (Y/N) to go in.

And so they followed the guards and (Y/N) was full of anxiety as she kept glancing up at her betrothed, wondering how he could remain so calm when everything seemed to go so wrong these days.

“This gatehouse is typically athrum with artisans and merchants travelling into the city,” one of the guards explained. “But it all strangely halted yester-eve,” he added.

“We sent a search party across the river to see if there was an obstruction upon the road,” Commander Malendrol continued. “But only one soldier returned.”

“Where is he?” Annatar asked, feeling (Y/N) trembling fingers intertwining with his. As usual, in times of trouble, she was seeking for him and his comfort, his assurance that it would all be alright and that he would keep her safe.

They stopped in front of a few other guards and when the guards walked away, they revealed a body of a soldier with his shirt torn to reveal his chest on which mysterious letters of the language unknown to Lady (Y/N) were carved. She winced and turned around to look away and Annatar squeezed her hand gently.

“Washed up this morning,” Commander Malendrol said. “He appeared to be carrying a message.”

Annatar took a step forward to take a better look at the body and read the signs as his face got serious. Adar’s army coming to Eregion was a part of his plan but he had been certain his Rings would be forged by then.

He was running out of time.

“Bury him,” he ordered and laid his eyes on Commander Malendrol. “Show this to no one,” he added. He did not want anyone in the city to be alarmed and expecting the worst.

When the guards walked away, Annatar put his arm around (Y/N) to walk her out of there and spare her delicate eyes from such sights. She sniffled her tears back and looked up at his face.

“That was awful…” She shook her head, affected. Annatar furrowed his brows, faking worry and compassion as he brought her hand up to his lips and placed a small kiss upon her knuckles. “Should I tell my father about it? I know he wanted us to carry on with his duties but this seems quite serious and–”

“No,” Annatar interrupted her as her lower lip trembled. “He has asked us to see it and that no one is permitted to disturb him,” he informed her in all seriousness, watching her eyes fill with more and more fresh tears. “Not even the smiths… Not even you.”

“N-not even m-me?” (Y/N)’s voice broke as silent tears streamed down her cheeks. Annatar smiled sadly at them as he wiped one with his thumb.

“He’s not himself, my gentle darling. For now, all we can do is leave him in solitude,” he whispered, trying to be the most delicate. Give him time. And pray…” He hesitated before finishing his sentence, unsure what effect it would have on her. “Pray that he finishes this work before it finishes him,” he eventually confessed, faking his own pain and sadness.

“I… I cannot lose my father. Oh, Annatar, please… I have suffered enough already, have I not?” She sobbed and he only stood there, watching her tears, not knowing what to say since he had so much more of the suffering prepared for her. “I lost my mother already… I cannot lose him. If there was a way of sacrificing my own self, my own sanity, just to save him… I would not hesitate,” she clenched her jaw out of determination as she confessed. “I know that he presents himself now as a man out of his mind but my father… My real father… He is the most gentle, the most kind, the most generous man and… And I would do everything to save him,” she finished, straightening her back as a sudden outburst of courage washed all over her.

Annatar looked down at their hands intertwined and caressed the silver ring on her finger with his thumb.

“The way you love is of the purest kind,” he whispered.

“I love you just the same,” she assured him and he cracked a sad smile before leaning in to kiss her forehead and walk away, leaving her crying quietly in the middle of the courtyard.

It was dark already when the siege began. Lady (Y/N) was as scared as everyone else but the very first person that came to her mind was Lord Annatar, naturally. The one who had always been able to make her feel the safest and the one who had always had a solution to all of her problems. He had always known how to comfort her with his sweet words.

So, even in times like this, she was running through the crowd of her father’s people, ignoring their screams and cries. And she did not run to the forge but to the tower where she had seen Annatar going before as she had been calling for him across the courtyard but he could not hear.

She was running up the stairs and then she froze at the sight of him, standing alone on the balcony and raising his hands up as he kept staring in the direction of the Orc army. What was he doing, she wondered? Was he performing some sort of magic spell, a ritual that was supposed to keep them all safe?

“My love?” She asked in a trembling tone. “My love, I am so scared,” she revealed and he turned around.

But the man she saw now – the sight of him made her gasp and take a step back as she nearly fell down the stairs. The man in front of her perhaps truly looked like her beloved Lord Annatar but his eyes were no longer kind or compassionate. There was nothing but pure evil and darkness burning in them as he approached her with a smirk.

“You, my love, are coming with me,” Annatar grabbed her by her arm, mocking the sweet phrase they had been calling each other with.

And as he dragged her behind him, she kept sobbing and trying to get out of his grasp but he was far too strong and no one could hear her cries for help amongst the chaos.

“What are you doing?!” She shouted. “Please, let me go! My love, please, you are scaring me!”

But all of her words and pleas seemed to have no effect upon her betrothed. He remained cold and unbothered as he dragged her towards her tower and all the way upstairs, pulling her body behind as if it was a sack of potatoes; not caring much about the many steps ahead of them and hurting her many times on the way.

He pushed the doors to her workshop open and threw her inside carelessly as he watched with contempt her body hitting the ground. Her gentle eyes looked up with fear at him as more and more sobs escaped her throat.

“Your father’s mind is of no use to me anymore. He has lost his senses,” Annatar announced, viciously. “You will craft me The Nine,” he added with a smirk, taking a step closer to her as she flinched and moved back.

“I do not understand… I…” She kept shaking her head and sniffling her tears back.

“Do you hear that?” Annatar shushed her as he faked concern. Screams and cries reached their eyes. “The people of Eregion are dying, my gentle Lady. And only you can save them – and your father – by giving me The Nine,” his fake concern turned into a smirk.

“Even if I wanted to, I cannot. My craft cannot match his in any way…” (Y/N)’s lips trembled.

“You are underestimating yourself as usual,” Annatar did not want to hear any of it as he stood right above her. “Your craft is more than enough. Have you not seen your works of art? I have. And all the noble ladies of Middle-earth and Númenor who are being complimented about their beauty… They all owe it to you,” he whispered, nearly seductively but the sudden eroticism of his voice was what scared her, too, because her pure and noble betrothed would never act this way.

Annatar crouched down to be on her level and she yelped, trying to move back even further but her back hit her desk, so she was trapped now between her own place of work and his body.

“You have been watching your father work for centuries. I am certain you are able to forge The Nine Rings for men,” he breathed out and leaned in even closer as their noises brushed but she turned her face away, trying to get away from him.

“Please, make it stop…” She pleaded. “I want my beloved back… I want Lord Annatar.”

“Oh, but… my sweet darling, Lord Annatar is me and I am him,” he smirked and the floor trembled this very moment after the city had been hit. (Y/N) cried out some more and he cupped her face as he shushed her gently with the most concerned expression he could manage. “My sweet, you can make it all stop. All of it, I promise.”

“Even if I truly could…” (Y/N) swallowed her tears. “I do not have any more mithril,” her whisper broke as she realised her own defeat.

“That is true, you do not,” Annatar nodded with a kind smile like his old one used to be but his eyes were still cold and cruel. “But you have something far more… precious,” he murmured as one of his hands travelled down to her neck and his fingernail brushed the pulsing point there, feeling her blood flowing underneath her smooth and gentle skin.

Their gazes met this very moment. Her eyes filled with terror at the realisation of what he was asking of her.

“What are you?” She breathed out, nearly inaudible as her whole body tensed. “No emissary of the Valar would ever ask me to do this,” she pointed out in a trembling voice and Annatar’s lips twitched as he kept staring at her the most intensely. “Who are you… truly?”

He moved away from her, very slowly. And as he was standing up to be above her once more, he appeared to get even taller and his presence was becoming more and more overlooming. (Y/N) curled herself up under his shadow as if she was a little mouse realising that she had just found herself in the trap set up by a big cat.

“I can become your doom or I can become your redemption. The choice is yours, but the longer you hesitate, the more people suffer. And Lord Celebrimbor… I am not quite certain if he is to survive the siege,” Annatar told her without even trying to hide his contempt.

“I have trusted you… I have betrayed my own father for you…” (Y/N) whimpered.

“Oh, but betrayal is a part of your bloodline, is it not?” Annatar smirked. “Even now, I can feel that you still… love me,” he added, mocking her feelings.

More tears escaped her eyes. Of course she still loved him. Was it even possible to stop loving someone so quickly?

“I love the lies you have told me. The illusion Lord Annatar has been,” she stuttered and gathered her strength to finally stand up as well although she had done it clumsily, grasping the edge of her desk to keep the balance. “But you… Whoever you are… I do not love you. And you will not lure me into your schemes,” she added, proudly. More screams from Eregion reached their ears but she remained cold as a statue and confused Annatar looked behind him after realising that her eyes were not set on him.

They were set on the portrait of her mother, Lady Dúlinnel.

“You might threaten me as much as you wish, dark spirit. And you might threaten me with my father’s death or mine,” she took a deep breath in, “but we do not fear it for we shall see Valinor after we die – a place where you are no longer welcome. And as much as I love my father, I know that he would rather die than allow me to forge such an abomination,” (Y/N) looked back at him again and Annatar’s fists clenched at her words as the muscles of his face twitched.

She could not be serious.

“You think you cannot be lured and tempted?” He smirked. “What about your great aunt, Lady Yestariel?”

“She… She is nothing but a fairytale,” (Y/N) shook her head. “She is a fairytale being told to young maidens as a warning… As a warning, so they know better and do not get seduced by the darkness. And I have listened to this fairytale many, many times. I shall not follow you and your commands anywhere for you are not the man I love…” (Y/N) sobbed as she said that because it was bringing her lots of pain to know that the love she had been receiving was nothing but a lie.

And even though Annatar smiled with pity at her, he was confused by his own reaction. Because some of his pity was genuine and the sight of her tears was unsettling to him. He did not want her to cry or resist him. He wanted her to follow him out of her own will.

“Let me show you,” he extended his hands but (Y/N) shook her head and tried to move away. “I just want to show you… the truth.”

“Nothing about you is the truth,” she remarked through her tears.

“Just let me,” Annatar did not listen to her at all and he grabbed her wrists as she groaned, trying to get away from his grasp. However, his fists were holding onto her so strongly that she gave up and that was when he showed her.

He showed her visions of his memories. He showed her Lady Yestariel, her great aunt, standing by Morgoth’s side. He showed her himself, watching Yestariel and twelve other Elves being tortured and changed into the first Uruks. He showed her Lady Yestariel’s eyes full of love and devotion whenever she laid them upon Morgoth. And he showed her Lady Yestariel’s fall as he was trying to reach her. He showed her all the memories he had from the First Age with her great aunt and a sister of her grandfather – Lord Commander Nillendur, who had died fighting the very evil his sister had chosen to follow.

(Y/N) gasped and took a step back as if Annatar’s touch was causing her physical pain. He let go of her and watched her confusion with satisfaction. Now she knew. She knew everything.

“You are He,” she whimpered, covering her lips with her fingers. “You are Sauron.”

“I have many names,” Annatar smiled at her maliciously, watching her whole world crumble down.

Everything she had believed and loved… Everything she had been dreaming of by her betrothed’s side… It had been nothing but the cruellest form of mockery.

“Why are you doing this to me?” She asked.

“I learnt from the best. I learnt from a God…” Annatar answered mysteriously. “When he sees the potential… He pushes them to the limits, he breaks them to rebuild,” he quoted his own words that he had said to Lady Yestariel about Morgoth. “You have the potential, my gentle darling.”

“You can kill me,” she breathed out to that. “I shall not take any part in your sorcery.”

“Yes, you will,” Annatar only said as he calmly turned around, approaching the doors. “I shall leave you here and the longer you hear their screams and cries, the more inclined you will be to forge me The Nine. And do not forget about your father either,” he added. “Good luck,” he smirked one more time before leaving her alone in her workshop.

Long hours passed and it was bright already when (Y/N) heard the doors open again. She expected no one else but Sauron himself, asking her about the progress. But it was not him – it was Mirdania.

She wondered how he had let that happen but considering the fact they were in the middle of a siege, it was quite acceptable for him to lose his focus on her for a moment.

“My Lady?” Mirdania asked, unsurely. “Are you hiding here?”

“I… I…” (Y/N) didn’t know what to answer.

She had been trying to get out of there but the doors had been locked and not even any of her tools had managed to open them. She had even considered jumping off of the tower but decided to not follow her mother’s steps and to prove the strength of her will. She simply had no idea how Mirdania managed to open the door – unless that was a part of Sauron’s plan as well…

But no – she refused to get paranoid.

“I am waiting for my father’s orders,” (Y/N) lied quickly.

“That is the thing, my Lady… Lord Celebrimbor is out of his mind, he acts as if the siege is not taking place. Lord Annatar is trying to help us but some of the commanders would rather wait for your orders,” Mirdania explained and (Y/N)’s heart skipped a beat at the mention of her betrothed’s name.

She opened her mouth to warn Mirdania about Annatar but then she realised she was on thin ice already. Her parents were both mad in the eyes of these people and she had her incidents as well. Now, in the middle of the attack, she was hiding inside the tower. If she was claiming now, all of the sudden, that the man she had been the most devoted to for the past few months was Sauron himself… Well, that could not possibly end well.

So, she had to straighten her back and simply pretend that everything was under control to calm her people down.

“I see,” she nodded. “Let me speak to Commander Malendrol,” she requested and followed Mirdania outside the tower.

To her surprise, there were no obstacles on the way. When she walked out of the tower and went into the courtyard, Commander Malendrol ran up to her immediately.

“My Lady, we are waiting for your orders,” he bowed his head at her.

“Who is leading the Orc’s attack?” (Y/N) asked, wanting confirmation of her suspicions.

“That man claiming to be the father of them – Adar,” Commander Malendrol answered, a little confused.

“I want to speak to him,” (Y/N) decided as Mirdania and the guard widened their eyes at her.

“My Lady!” Mirdania gasped. “That is too late to negotiate.”

“Has anyone tried?” (Y/N) raised an eyebrow.

“Herald Elrond, my Lady,” Commander Malendrol nodded at her.

“Let me as well. I am the Lady of Eregion since my father is… indisposed,” she insisted. “Send a messenger to Adar and tell him that Lady (Y/N) wishes to negotiate with him,” she told Commander Malendrol and then she hesitated. “Tell him to consider it… for the sake of his old friendship with Lady Yestariel. Adar will know what that is supposed to mean.”

Escorted by her guards that had been stripped of their swords, Lady (Y/N) walked through the muddy battlefield as the siege had stopped for a while and the Orcs kept staring at her with curiosity.

She did not feel safe by any means and the fact that Annatar had allowed her to get out of the tower, so far from the city, was more than worrying, she had to admit.

Still, she wanted to take her chance.

She spotted Adar approaching her from the opposite side and she recognised him immediately from the visions Annatar had shown to her before about her great aunt.

“Lady (Y/N),” Adar bowed his head slightly at the sight of her.

“Lord Father,” she tried to address him with respect and he cracked a smile before pointing at a tent to which he invited her.

She nodded her head at her guards and they allowed her to walk inside without them. Adar followed and they were left alone since no Orc was in there either.

“Thank you for still wanting to negotiate. Forgive my tardiness. My father is indisposed,” (Y/N) looked at Adar and watched him carefully.

“There is nothing to negotiate, Lady (Y/N). However, I could not deny your request after Lady Yestariel’s name was mentioned,” he sat down on one of the chairs but (Y/N) refused to sit down as she kept standing above him.

“What do you want of Eregion?” She asked. “I do not care if I live or die, I have lived for centuries, I have made sure my name will not be forgotten for I have mastered my humble craft. And I know that after I die, the light of Valinor awaits me. My people, however, the citizens of Eregion… Some of them are very young – they are children. They have not yet lived enough and they are far too young to understand. They are scared and in pain. I want it to stop,” she confessed as silent tears escaped her eyes.

“I want Sauron,” Adar answered, unbothered by her tears although his eyes kept following them streaming down her cheeks.

“I know who he is. I shall give him to you,” (Y/N) looked down at her hand where the silver ring still decorated her finger. She fidgeted with it nervously as she cracked a nervous smile. “Come with me, Lord Father,” she raised her eyes to lay them upon him. “I shall lead you inside Eregion and bring you to him. Spare my city and I shall give you Sauron.”

Long silence occurred and Adar kept watching her with his eyes squinted. She didn’t feel in danger around him but she could feel that he was not trusting her. She didn’t understand why, though.

“Why would I believe you? Is it not his ring you are wearing?” He snorted at her hand and she swallowed thickly.

“How do you know? I have been deceived… But I do not love Sauron,” she assured him, desperately.

“How can I be so sure that you are not willing to lead me into his trap? The way I see it, he was the one to send you here,” Adar explained.

“Why would I follow his orders? I hate him!” (Y/N) exclaimed, frustrated. “I want him dead as much as you,” she hissed out but she felt her heart quickening its pace at the realisation that she was trying to convince herself as much as him.

“He was the one to send you here… even if you do not realise that yet. Everything is a part of his scheme,” Adar told her softly and stood up to approach her. “You are far too gone now, my Lady; too entangled in his web,” he held her hands gently, squeezing the finger with Annatar’s silver ring on it. “Your great aunt was a dear friend of mine. We joined Morgoth together and we suffered together. I mourned her death.”

“And now, for the sake of the memory of her, can you not trust me?” (Y/N) tried to search for compassion in his cold eyes and she found it. But not in the way she expected.

“For the sake of the memory of her and because I have known Yestariel and her devotion to Morgoth, I know I cannot trust you a bit – even if I wanted to.”

(Y/N) was full of anger and frustration when she was on her way back to Eregion. The siege was supposed to go back to its full force in a few minutes since Adar had graciously granted her enough time to go back to her people before he would attack once again.

Her jaw was clenched and her eyes were burning with anger caused by her frustration. She truly had been thinking that Adar would help her and join her clever plan. However, Annatar kept destroying everything even when he was physically far away from her.

The moment she entered the city, she bumped into him – Annatar himself, looking as if the siege around him had not affected him at all because his robes and face remained clean. Even the whimsical bow in his blond hair seemed to be untouched. He looked down at her and greeted her with a warm smile.

“My love, I was told you had gone to negotiate with the Orcs? I have been so worried,” he put on a show in front of others.

“Oh, get out of my way,” (Y/N) pushed him away as everyone gasped, staring at her with widened eyes as she kept walking towards her tower.

“My Lord, are you alright?” Mirdania was by Annatar’s side in no time, offering him comfort after such a treatment from his betrothed. In fact, everyone pitied him – he made sure of that by putting on his hurt and confused expression.

“It is nothing,” Annatar assured her with a sad smile. “Lady (Y/N) is worried about the city and her father. Her annoyance is understandable.”

“We are all nervous, my Lord. She should have not acted this way towards you…” Mirdania insisted and Annatar took a deep breath in while trying to compose himself.

Once again he had been proved that the most devoted ones were always the most annoying ones as well.

He had to admit, he quite liked (Y/N)’s anger and the way she had pushed him. From that scared little mouse curling up on the floor beneath him, she quickly gathered her strength and courage and that was the most admirable.

“That is enough, Mirdania,” Annatar gave the smith a harsh, scolding look that took her aback. “We are in the middle of a siege and my relationship with Lady (Y/N) should not be one of your concerns. In fact, it should not be your concern at all. Now, forgive me, I should follow her for she seems to be upset.”

And as he said, he did, gathering his robe and hurrying up the stairs to (Y/N)’s workshop.

The doors were ajar, so he only gently pushed them to see what she was doing and what he witnessed made him gasp softly.

(Y/N) was sitting on the ground, surrounded by all the tools she needed, the gemstones, metals and the cauldrons melting them. Her hands were shaking out of anger and one of her hands was cut open; bleeding all over the ingredients of the future Nine Rings she was forging.

Hearing him walk inside, she looked up with fury and anger that sent a shiver down his spine. She had absolutely no idea how beautiful she looked but also how terrifying. Like a dark witch her great aunt had aspired to be.

Like a dark witch Sauron himself craved to have by his side; for her to command his armies of demons and shadows.

“I can play a game with you, too, shadow of Morgoth,” she drawled out through her gritted teeth. “You wish for my blood and its dark magic to seal your greatest creations? Let it be then,” she smirked as she squeezed her hand and allowed more of her blood to leak out. “Watch me curse myself for the usage of this forbidden craft. I care no more about what happens to me because, in the end, the last laugh will be mine, you fool,” her eyes sparkled at the sight of her blood mixing with the melting gold. Then, she looked up at him again. “You are forever bound with me now and for whatever you will use these Nine Rings – or The Seven that are allied to them – I shall be a part of your schemes forever now. My influence and my power is bleeding into these and you better beware while you use them for I swear to you… These Nine Rings will be your demise,” she finished her curse and used a thin spatula to mix the gold with her blood as she already reached out for the gemstones with her free hand.

Annatar had nothing to say at that. He only kept watching her in awe – witnessing her most beautiful craft and her most beautiful, terrific rage.

Oh, he was in love with her, he thought.

Now he was certain of it.

“These Rings are not my greatest creations,” he whispered. “You are.”

MASTERLIST

#annatar x reader #sauron x reader #halbrand x reader #lilysfiction

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aquaticmercy · 13 hours ago

Text

Waste a Moment / Part 5

Summary : Bucky had always kept his distance, but seeing you get hurt on a mission changed everything. For the first time, he has a chance to start over with you.

Pairing : Bucky Barnes x avenger!reader (she/her)

Warnings/tags : Mentions of food. Cursing. Memory loss. Head injury. Reader used to work in a museum.

Requested by : @remoony

Word count : 2.7k

Note : I’ve got this queued up so if you asked to be tagged in the last 12 hours, I have not added you but will add you to the next one! It’s my masters graduation ceremony and I have a lot of people to catch up with so won't be very active today. Enjoy!

Series Masterlist

“From Behind Your Eyes”

Monday.

Things began to shift between you and Bucky in subtle ways.

It started with small moments. Today, during a walk through the city, he asked if you wanted to stop by a bakery.

“Your favourite," he said with a soft smile.

You blinked at him, caught off guard. You didn’t know it was your favourite bakery—it had only opened a year ago

You had no recollection of it existing, let alone stepping inside.

Yet, when you stood outside the little shop, taking in the scent of freshly baked bread and buttery pastries, you sighed in recognition. Like your senses were telling you that this was the place, even though your mind was blank.

Bucky held the door open, letting you step inside. The bell above the door jingled, and that sound struck something deep within you. Was it... loss? Or comfort? You weren’t sure.

He handed you a croissant without a word.

When you took your first bite, something clicked. It felt right, the taste, the texture—the buttery flakiness melting on your tongue. It was comforting, familiar, even if the memories that should accompany it weren’t there.

You couldn’t explain why, but for the first time, a puzzle piece fell into place.

You glanced up at Bucky. His eyes were fixed on you, watching your reaction closely.

"Good?" he asked, his voice careful, almost too casual.

"Yeah.” You nodded, swallowing the pastry.

It was more than good—it felt like home. Whatever that meant these days.

Wednesday.

The scent of pancakes filled the air on Wednesday morning.

You heard the sound of sizzling batter before seeing Bucky standing over the stove, smiling at you.

"A whole tablespoon of butter and two of maple syrup," he said, placing a plate in front of you. He was busying himself with the last touches, but you could see the concentration in his movements, the care he had put into even something so simple.

You stared down at the plate, your fork hovering just above the fluffy stack. It looked perfect, like it had been made specifically for you, and in a way, it had. You couldn’t remember ever eating this combination of specific measurements before— you always thought you were a cereal eater. But somehow, the moment you took that first bite, it felt like the most natural thing in the world.

A comfortable silence settled between you two as you ate. The pancakes were soft, the butter melting, and the syrup soaked through just enough to make each bite rich but not overwhelming. It was perfect.

He was perfect.

A soft smile tugged at your lips as you watched him out of the corner of your eye. There was something endearing about how well he knew you, even when you didn’t know yourself.

The more time you spent with him, the more you found yourself drawn to him— not just because he was familiar, but because he made you feel safe.

And somewhere along the way, that safety began to shift into something else.

Your heart started to skip a beat when he laughed. Your stomach fluttered when he’d touched you. You found yourself looking for more and more excuses to be around him.

You caught yourself staring at him more than once—like now, as he leaned against the counter, arms crossed.

Your chest tightening in ways that were starting to feel dangerously familiar. A crush.

Bucky looked up and caught your gaze, and you quickly focused back on your plate, heat rising to your cheeks.

Friday.

Today, you were curled up in the living room, a blanket wrapped around your shoulders when he handed you a book.

"You read this a couple of years ago," he said, his voice soft, almost hesitant. He held out the worn copy of a short book, fingers brushing against the frayed edges. "Thought you might want to read it again."

You took it from him, your eyes skimming the cover. The title stirred nothing at first—just another gap in your mind.

There was a quiet confidence in the way he handed you the book that maybe, just maybe, this small thing would help.

As you read, something unlocked within you. The words slipped into place like they belonged.

Like they had always belonged.

Sunday.

By the time you finished, it had become your favourite book once again.

"You knew," you said, feeling a little shy, admitting how easily you'd fallen back in love with it.

Bucky smiled, the kind of smile that reached his eyes, though there was always a hint of something dark behind it. "Some things don’t change."

You wanted to believe him, but you knew better.

The truth was, so much had changed. The pieces of your life felt scattered, rearranged in ways you didn’t always understand.

Bucky… he was a constant. It was as though he saw parts of you that you hadn’t yet rediscovered.

You noticed it in the quiet moments—the way Bucky would linger in doorways, watching you, or how his voice softened whenever he said your name, like he was holding onto a precious gem.

You weren’t the person you had been before, and yet, with Bucky, you started to feel like maybe you didn’t have to be.

Still, there was an unspoken thing that hung between you, something that Bucky carried but never fully acknowledged.

Monday.

Bucky had trouble sleeping, as he would do when he was under a lot of stress.

He laid in bed, staring up at the ceiling. He could feel his racing heart, as if it wanted to claw its way out.

In his mind, he replayed the moment that haunted him every night—the words he’d said to you.

“I feel like I can’t breathe around you.”

He had said it with a cold finality, and regretted it immediately.

He’d only ever driven you away to spare you from the darkness he dragged around like ankle weights. You deserved so much more— someone free from shadows that never seemed to leave.

Even if you’d forgotten, he couldn’t unburden himself from the knowledge that he’d pushed you away when he should have held you close.

And when he did finally fall asleep, nightmares haunted him.

In the dream, he watched realisation dawning on your face— as you remembered the things he’d said, the hurt he’d caused. You looked at him with that same raw, wounded expression he’d seen before, the same one that haunted him on sleepless nights.

In the dream, you turned away, just as you had before, only this time you were walking into the dark embrace of death. He reached for you, desperate to take it all back, but the distance between you grew.

He’d run and run, trying to follow you, but at the end of the tunnel, he’d see you limp body lying underneath the rubble.

Bucky’s eyes snapped open. His breath came in shallow, ragged gasps. He laid in bed, trembling, drenched in sweat.

Unable to stay there, he swung his legs over the edge of the bed and got up. He found himself heading down the hall toward your room.

The light in the guest room was dim, the door left slightly ajar, as it always was. You told him it made you feel less alone, that someone was nearby if you needed them.

Bucky found himself standing just outside, watching the gentle rise and fall of your chest.

You looked so peaceful, so innocent in sleep, untouched by the memories that plagued him.

Quietly, he leaned against the doorframe. The words slipped out before he could stop them.

“I feel like I can’t breathe around you,” he whispered.

It was true then, and it was true now—though for different reasons.

Back then, he’d said it to drive you away, to keep you from seeing the broken parts of him he didn’t want you to know.

But now, every small smile, every lingering glance, every hesitant touch stole his breath, until he was choking on the overwhelming affection he felt for you and on the regret of what he’d said to you.

“I thought I didn’t deserve you.” He swallowed. “I thought I was doing the right thing by keeping you away.” His eyes studied you, memorising every scar, every curve. “But I was wrong. and you’ll never know…”

All he wanted was to tell you the truth, to give you the choice to stay or to go. But the thought of you choosing to go… he couldn’t bear it.

You shifted slightly in your sleep, and Bucky’s heart skipped a bit. For a split second, he thought he’d woken you, but you settled back against your pillow, your cute snores filling the air again.

He let out a small sigh of relief.

He lingered a moment longer, allowing himself this one selfish moment to simply be there, watching over you.

He stayed for ten minutes.

Ten turned to thirty.

And thirty minutes turned to an hour.

Then, he started noticing things.

At first, it was subtle— his enhanced hearing noticed that your breathing quickened. He then saw your brows knitting together.

He knew the signs by heart— a nightmare.

His chest tightened as he watched, his metal fingers curling around the doorframe. He wanted to reach out, to wake you before the horrors took hold. But he froze, unsure if his presence would be a comfort or if it would only make things worse.

You whimpered softly, The sound was like a bullet to his brain, slicing through the peace he had found watching over you.

Bucky knew— perhaps too well— all the ways a nightmare could lay you bare, exposing the things you wanted no one else to see. Who was he to interfere, to try drag you out of the darkness when he himself lived in it?

Then you whispered his name. The sound sent a chill down his spine. His name, spoken with a tone so raw and broken it made his heart ache. Were you dreaming of him? Of the words he had said, the pain he had caused?

He didn’t know why he stayed as he watched you wrestle with whatever horrors your mind had conjured. He took a small, shaky step forward. His mouth opened but nothing came out.

Your breathing grew ragged, your hands clutching at the blanket. Bucky’s fists clenched at his sides, shame brewing inside him.

He knew he should be there for you, but he couldn't bring himself to cross that threshold, to invade the fragile privacy of your dreams.

Finally, your breathing steadied, the nightmare subsiding. Bucky released a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding.

He took a step back.

He hadn’t done anything. He hadn’t tried to help.

He watched a second longer, making sure you’d found peaceful sleep again. When he was certain you had, he turned and left for his room.

As he closed his door behind him, Bucky let out a shaky sigh. His body slid on the floor, pressing his palms against his eyes as he tried to block out the image of you—fragile, broken, and alone in a nightmare he might have caused.

He wrapped his hand around his knees, rocking slightly in an attempt to keep himself sane.

He shifted slightly, feeling an odd dampness against his skin. It was only when he brought a hand to his face that he realised his cheeks were wet, his shirt damp where the tears had dropped.

He hadn't even realised he started crying.

The tears kept coming, slow and steady, trickling down on his face.

He thought of you, peaceful again now, but still vulnerable, left to face nightmares he was too afraid to pull you from. He thought of the words he’d spoken to you, the ones he could never take back. The ones that had hurt you more than he’d ever wanted.

The tears were relentless, a silent admission of all the things he’d buried—his regret, his self-loathing, his desperation for forgiveness he was too afraid to ask for. His body shook with quiet sobs, his breaths shallow and uneven.

And for the first time since he thought he’d lost you, Bucky let himself cry for everything he’d lost.

For the moments he’d missed, the chances he’d thrown away, the love he’d pushed aside out of fear. And as his tears finally slowed, leaving him a hollow shell of himself, he realised that this was the price he’d paid for pushing you away all those years.

Tuesday.

“Do you ever have nightmares?” you asked between breakfast bites, trying to sound casual as you picked at your food.

You didn’t know how to admit it at first, but even when you slept through all of last night, you hadn’t slept very well. Every time you’d close your eyes, you’d find yourself trapped under layers of crushing weight, and the fear would trap you in unconsciousness, unable to wake up, unable to separate what’s real or fake.

Bucky paused just slightly before he looked up. For a moment, he didn’t know how much to say.

“Yeah,” he replied finally, cautiously. “It used to be worse.”

You nodded, encouraged by his honesty. “Mine are… strange. They’re just pieces. I don't remember them all.” You looked down at your hands, unsure how to continue. “It doesn’t even feel like they’re mine.”

“How come?” He asked, narrowing his eyes.

“It’s… I—I feel like I’m trapped under something heavy. I can’t breathe, and when I try to move, it just…”

You stopped in your tracks, the nightmares slipping away just as your memory had.

“And I see you sometimes,” you admitted sheepishly, “I feel you pulling me out of the dark.”

Bucky’s hand brushed yours across the table.

He swallowed hard, knowing that was where he found you. How he found you. Crushed under the rubble, barely alive.

Still, a wave of relief washed over him. If there was any comfort to cling to in all of this, it was that he hadn’t caused your nightmares. You hadn’t heard his quiet confession from the night before, those fragile words spoken in the darkness while you slept. You didn’t know.

You didn’t know what he said.

You didn’t know.

You can’t ever know.

A twisting guilt formed in his stomach— would I really rather have her dream of a crushing pain over the painful words I said?

“They can’t hurt you,” he said finally, his voice stern with conviction. He was convincing himself, really, more than you.

You felt the cold of his metal hand, but your cheeks started burning.

You met his eyes, and for a moment, the vulnerability between you was tangible.

“Thank you, Bucky.” Your voice was barely a whisper. “For making me feel like I’m not alone.”

He looked down. A small, shy smile tugged at his lips. “Anytime.”

The silence that followed wasn’t uncomfortable. His hand lingered on yours, fingers tracing small circles against your skin.

You didn’t even realise you were leaning in until you felt his breath against your lips—warm, shallow, like he was fighting the same internal battle you were. His eyes flicked down to your mouth for the briefest second.

The pull between you was magnetic.

His fingers trailed up your arm, lingering at your forearm, and it was that touch—the coolness of his skin against tour veins—that undid you. Your breath hitched, your heart pounding so hard you thought it might burst from your chest.

And then, without thinking, you started closing the gap.

His lips hovered over yours, not quite touching, the tension so thick it was suffocating.

It was a heartbeat away.

But then—

The sound of your phone shattered the moment, vibrating against the table.

Sam’s name flashed on the screen, his timing almost painfully ironic.

“Hey,” you answered, forcing your voice to stay steady.

“Hey!” Sam was his usual chipper self, oblivious to what he’d interrupted. “We’re discussing a training program for you if you want to come back on Thursday?”

You glanced at Bucky. He had turned away slightly, focusing on his half-eaten plate. “I— I’ll think about it,” you replied, feeling a pang of disappointment as you hung up.

You glanced at Bucky, wondering if he felt the same strange disconnect.

He didn’t say anything. His expression had shifted back to that neutral calm he so often wore.

You wished you had the courage to say something, that you could break the silence and address what had nearly happened between you.

You were too unsure, too awkward to bring it up. You weren’t sure what it even meant—whether it was a lapse in judgement, a moment of weakness, or if it was something more that neither of you were brave enough to confront.

“I think I’m gonna start training again on Thursday.”

-to be continued...

Taglist : @hzdhrtss @irisk12 @tayyyystan @seventeen-x @lomlbuckybarnes

@greatenthusiasttidalwave @avatarofthetimelords @bckynatt @winchestert101 @zemosprincesa

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@infqnitysblog @isnow-0r-never @roofwitty779 @baw1066 @wasalreadyhere

@cjand10 @greatmistakes @winterslove1917 @calwitch @sebastians-love

@gyllord @brckenmemories @ethereal-witch24 @diffidentphantom

@avatarofthetimelords @lumidotexe @oscarissac2099 @currentfacination @pono-pura-vida

@blackbirdwitch22 @royalwriteroftheuniverse @ayayaeyato @btssaysstudy @unaxv

@otterlycanadian @lifeisbutadream444 @mostlymarvelgirl @ozwriterchick @m1cky-y-y

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@one-lengthiness36 @chimchoom @waitingformysandman @blackhawkfanatic @chaotic-taco-collector-blog

@aurysartstudio @olive-main

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes x female reader #james buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes x f!reader #Sebastian stan #Sebastian stan x reader #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes angst #Bucky barnes x reader angst #bucky barnes x reader fluff

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signanothername · 2 days ago

Note

What do u think of the trope where Blue/Swap joins the bad guy???

I have complicated feelings about it?

I love the trope in of itself, I think it would be a really interesting trope to explore

The problem tho? I never once saw it executed in a way that grabbed my attention or made me actually love the story it was used in

It immediately goes to the “asshole” Dream and Ink and “kind found family” Nightmare gang trope

Which again, if you don’t know, I hate the trope of Dream being somehow an asshole or somehow treating Swap as tho he’s less than him

Ink is a whole different story where the fandom simply villainize him just cause he’s soulless

And the kind found family Nightmare gang is a trope I love, but just like the trope of Blue joining the Nightmare gang, it’s poorly executed most of the time (and I mean, how can you call it a “Blue joins the bad guys” when the “bad guys” are shown to be good guys????)

Like, I opened so many different fics only to be hit with the same execution of this trope over and over, eventually just losing interest bxhxhdhdh

The idea of Swap not being able to “keep up” with Ink and Dream or is somehow neglecting himself to take care of Dream just doesn’t really intrigue me (or even make sense to me)

Like don’t get me me wrong, I’m an absolute sucker for the “Swap is literally the only anchor Dream has left in his life otherwise he’d fucking break down” but I dare say Swap is more than capable of handling it without it weighing him down to a significant degree

This is Swap for god’s sake, he’s literally Papyrus’ personality but in a Sans body, if anything, he’s the one who has his shit together the most and is able to go on with a genuine happy and determined smile on his face, no matter the shit that happens to him, it would make a lot more sense for Dream to be the one to try and catch up with Swap than the other way around

I get that the trope tries to show the limitations of Swap as a mortal compared to Dream and Ink who are both pretty much immortal, but what people tend to do is that they completely twist Swap to be absolutely pathetic just for this trope to work

Which *shakes the fandom* I promise you don’t have to completely change a character up to make a trope work

Like I saw stories that made Blue to be somehow a weak depressed anxious guy trying so hard and is failing and whatnot and I question myself whether that’s even Swap anymore hchcchcjvj

I think the problem I usually see when people try and write different tropes for different characters, is that they try to make the trope make sense, and so they twist the character around to fit around the trope

Which, imho, is ineffective, you should understand the character, and then think of how the character would deal with a certain situation and how that leads to the trope you’re trying to write, one step at a time without having to ignore/erase important personality traits of the character

Of course, that doesn’t mean the trope you’re trying to write can’t fundamentally change the perception, personality, or behavior of a character, but you have to show how it affects the character to such a fundamental degree, show how can the character be heavily influenced and affected in a way that makes sense for said character

For example, I’ve seen people write Swap neglecting to eat cause he’s trying to “keep up” or sometimes Dream and Ink don’t give him the chance to cause they pressure him to go on another mission or push him too hard

Here are some problems I see with this:

- why is the Nightmare gang even somehow attacking every single day? Have they got nothing better to do? Especially with the fact they’re a found family now?

- why is Dream and Ink going out for “missions” every day if the Nightmares aren’t attacking, like damn what are they even doing?? What are these “important missions”?? Since when was Ink so obsessed with “missions”?

- Swap would absolutely not let that shit stand, if anything, he’d be very vocal about it and tell Dream and Ink to sit down and eat his great delicious tacos (Swap’s voice always has power behind it, and his actions are a direct reflection of his beliefs not what others push him to do)

- Ink has a home in the doodlesphere, he wouldn’t even be around enough to push Blue, while Swap has an AU and a brother, there is pretty much no way he’d be with Dream and Ink 24/7, and if he was somehow, you think Swap Paps would let it slide? And even if we go with the idea of Swap not being part of an AU anymore, you think Swap himself would neglect himself just to please others even when it doesn’t align with his own beliefs?

And those are only few of the top of my head, I’m pretty sure if I sat down and thought about this for a few hours, I’d be able to write you a whole other set of problems

Not saying you can never write Swap neglecting to eat, you absolutely can, it’s just needs to make sense for Swap as a character, what would it take for Swap to start neglecting his health? It’s not others pressuring him or pushing him I can tell you that much

So yeah, good trope, not so good execution (for me at least)

I guess I’m way too focused on the logic of it to truly enjoy it for what it is, but then again I always love to complicate things way more than I need to

Not every trope or story has to make sense completely, but I guess seeing Swap be completely made into a pathetic mess with no actual grounds to support it beyond “he’s mortal and his friends aren’t“ just ruins it for me dhdhhdhd

#anothers ask #swap sans

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hearts4werka · 2 days ago

Text

NNN day 3 | Skin Deep Scars

summary: you’ve been born into a rich controlling family, always having to stay on top and never cross the line. You tried to please your mother but never could be enough for your mother’s standards, your father was mostly at work and away at business trips so both of you hardly ever interacted with each other. That’s until you got into an argument about your new friend chris who was the polar opposite of you, what do you think will happen next?

warnings: ANGST, !parental abuse!, arguing (again ik), family issues, swearing, manipulation, controlling mother figure, !burning skin!, slight fighting, crying, !mentions of childhood trauma! And this contains sensitive topics for many (even me) so please I advice to read this with caution and knowingly what you’re consuming.

authors note: day 3 is behind us now, thank yall so much for all of the love on the past fics I seriously rlly appreciate it. Yall can drop some ideas for future days and fics outside of this in my inbox and I’ll be happy to write them, I don’t have my computer with me rn so I’ll make the gradient text when I’m at my computer again, hope y’all enjoy this one

no nut november | masterlist | guestlist

Escalated screams and yells fill the large space of the room, making my ears want to fall off as foul words continue to fall from my mother’s mouth. It’s not the first time my mother has yelled at me for the most stupidest bullshit ever known to mankind and this is one of them, somehow it never turned psychical between us which could be a shocker for some of the others considering how loud she is screaming and shouting that you would think she’d hit me by now or at least threaten to.

“You are bringing such shame to this family! It’s unacceptable!” She shouts, her face contoured with pure anger. I might as well see smoke coming out of her ears by now, rolling my eyes as I feel my own anger rise inside of me at how ridiculous she is being right now. “I bring shame? What about you sleeping around behind dad’s back, huh?” I argue back, not letting her bring me down and standing my ground. She gasps dramatically as if I insulted her whole bloodline, pressing her hand to her chest to make her seem more like a victim.

“Don’t you dare speak of that! This isn’t about my mistakes, it’s about yours!” She attempts to defend her name but fails miserably, thinking if she raises her voice higher than me she’ll have the high ground and take the upper hand in this argument. “You’re the one that’s hanging out with that street rat and even dare to invite him to this house!” My blood boils to high temperatures at her insult targeted towards Chris, well she isn’t very fond of him and his lifestyle or he of how she treats me from all of the stories I’ve previously told him.

Summarizing that thought, their hatred is mutual towards themselves. “Don’t bring him into this, he has nothing to do with this! It was one lower grade, mom!” I yell defensively, the level of my irritation rising with each second of just breathing in the tense air in the room. “That he caused by the influence he has on you! I just want the best for you, honey.” She tries to twist her tone into a softer one but I can feel the fakeness radiating off it the minute it comes past her lips, how pathetic.

“You aren’t convincing anyone with that fake tone, that’s for sure.” I state annoyingly as she attempts to move closer to me but when she sees me backing away she just gives up with trying to convince me into doing anything she wants with the same old method and decides on a newly invented one. “Fine, maybe I wont convince you at least but your father is pretty gullible and he’ll do anything I ask him to do. Even if i feed him a couple lies involving you and that little skank.”

I narrow my eyes at her, not believing her words at first until she shoots me a specific look which informs me she isn’t playing around, raising her eyebrow and slightly dipping her chin just always has her whole bitchy personality written all over her face in that moment. My face normally would drop in color but at this point I didn’t care, she brought Chris into this who has nothing to do with this and shouldn’t be assumed as the cause of my lower grade. It was one of the hardest exams this semester and even when I studied harder than ever and got the highest grade in my class, she still doesn’t appreciate my hard work.

My head decides its the perfect time to bring up the first time I got a lower grade, being only at the age as young as seven she was already pressuring me into being perfect and didn’t even allow me to have a normal childhood only filling me with more work and mental pressure I often was too tired to do anything the next morning after studying all night in hopes to attempt to please my mother but no matter what I did, she never fully appreciated it and always found something bad to point out.

Start of Flashback

I excitedly run into the living room with my test clutched in my head, my dress flowing in the slight breeze coming from the window. A proud smile spread on my face as I reach the living room where mommy resided in sitting on the couch, holding up my paper for her vision to see the teachers red mark saying ‘79/100’ in the corner of the paper. “Look mommy, my teacher said I got the highest grade in my class on the test!” I exclaim proudly, waiting for my applause but was met with silence. Tilting my head to the side to glance at my mommy confused on why she is quiet but she had only a disgusted and an unimpressed look shadowing her face.

She notices my confused expression and finally speaks, turning her head away from me and back at the tv “Honey, that’s not good enough for this family. Study harder next time.” She states without any sympathy in her voice as she goes back to her activity like nothing happened, my eyes slightly start to water. Why am I not good enough for mommy? Why isn’t mommy proud of me and saying nice words like my teacher was? My arms drop down to my sides with the paper still clutched in my small arms.

“What do you mean, mommy?” I ask curiously, my voice becoming slight wobbly as shaky breaths enter an exit past my lips. “My teacher said I did great and even gave me a lollipop!” I add, now my sadness being evident and that’s when mommy looked at me and sees me upset. “Oh baby, you know what I told you about eating too much sweets. And a 76 isn’t high enough for the reputation our family has.” She says in a reassuring voice, seeming as if she wanted the best for me and me being the gullible and innocent child, not realizing she’s manipulating me into doing whatever her heart desired and shaping me into a perfect little toy to play in her game.

“I just want the best for you honey and you know that, I would never do anything to hurt you, ever.” She calmly assured in a soft tone, she walks over to me and wipes my tear-stained cheek with her thumb and looks at me with fake sympathy mixed with fake remorse. “Now go to your room and study for the next test, mommy has to go attend to some things, okay?” I nod my head yes and ran off into my room, the paper flying out of my hand and landing in the floor. My body immediately jumping onto my bed and bury my face into the nearby pillow as I clutch my favorite stuffed animal to my chest…

End of Flashback

I remember crying the rest of the night and thought it was normal and everyone’s mother was pressuring them into being better than every other kid and always perfect to upkeep the family’s ‘perfect’ reputation. Now that I’ve grown up and caught onto my mother’s manipulative acts, letting me have the upper hand in some regards. “You’re pure goddamn evil, I can’t believe you’re trying to scare me with dad out of all people.” I huff, feeling my body become more tense by the second before adding. “Better than one of the guys you cheated on dad with.” After the words leave my mouth, she immediately darts towards me and gets impossibly closer to my face. Glaring at me as if she wanted to strangle the shit out of me.

“I said, don’t you dare bring that into this situation, young lady!” She warns, her voice completely shifting from fake sympathy to rage and evilness. One of her hands raises and she sticks out her finger, getting it in my face as if to try and scare me further but I only laugh in her face. “One more word out of your mouth and I make one call to your father, singing like a bird to him about all of the things you’ve said to your own mother.” She wipes imaginary tears off from under her eyes, pretending to be upset and hurt as if she’s the victim here. “You’re such an ungrateful brat, I’m surprised we haven’t kicked you out the house yet. You always disappoint us and bring total shame to the family.”

An evil laugh rumbles in her throat, I don’t see her as a loving mother I thought I had. No, I see her as the worst and most controlling mother ever known to mankind and I feel ashamed being in the proximity of her and letting her walk all over me like a doormat. She takes a few steps back and finally puts some distance between our bodies, I sharply inhale the tense air surrounding us as the following words fall from her mouth that I was just waiting for her to speak.

“I regret you were even born, more with every passing minute. Me and your father never wanted a girl, but a boy and at one point were debating to put you in an orphanage or give you away, another decision I regret making.”

Before my mother could say another word, I deliver a slap across her face and throw the words out of her mouth. She looks up at me, completely livid and fet up with this little cat fight between us. “That’s it, you’re getting punished hardly this time.” She angrily exclaims and roughly grasps my arm, dragging me into the kitchen by pure mad force. I try to escape her vice grip but it only makes it tighter, the feeling of pain and a bruise coming in spreads across my whole body as I see her walking towards the stove.

I start to get more desperate to escape, almost beginning to scream for her to stop and don’t do what I know she’s about to do. She did it before when I talked back to her ever and looks like today her strings popped too much, we get to the stove and she ticks it on, the flame blooming to life as she forces my arm above it. “Please, mom dont do this…” I weakly plead as the burning sensation starts to hit my skin, spreading across my whole arm. I cry out in pain and pleads for her to stop, quiet curses falling from my lips as she only glances at me sternly. Tears prick my eyes and burn down my cheeks, she continues to hold my arm over the flames and brings it closer.

My body starts squiring around, my pleads getting more and more desperate as more tears fall from my eyes. “Stop! Please, mom I’m begging you stop!” Shaky breaths fill the air and accompany the growing cries and pleads to my mother. “Stop moving around, you brat! Are you going to still be disobedient towards me now?” She asks mockingly as I think she’s going to burn my skin off, someone pushes her off me and I immediately fall to the ground in pure agony. The uncontrollable cries continuing to fall from my mouth, my eyes landing on the severe burn mark left behind on my arm, my eyes start to burn themselves from the amount of tears filling them at once

“What in the actual fuck is happening here?” I hear a familiar voice yell out as I don’t think about who it could be until they kneel down next to me and I realize it’s Chris, I forgot I invited him over today. I can’t believe he’s seeing me in this state right now, he glances at my arm and immediately grasps it gently into his hands. “Jesus Christ, we need to get you some serious help, cmon we gotta go to the hospital.” He calls out and helps me get up and stand on my feet, rushing me out of the house and looking around for something to quickly get me where I severely need to be right now. “You got a private driver here somewhere?” He questions and I nod negatively, there aren’t any available unless you ask for one beforehand.

‘Fuck, umm- okay then let’s just take.. your car!” He exclaims nervously, pointing towards one of the cars in the driveway. Quickly running over to it and rushing me inside of it, getting into the drivers seat and trying to start the car. When he finally gets a hang of the functioning of the car he quickly presses down on the gas and speeds out of the driveway and towards the hospital…

Guestlist!

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money4martin · 3 days ago

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the nanny [paige bueckers] part nine

(chapters 15 & 16)

read part eight here!

chapter fifteen: pink frosting.

paige pulled her car into her designated spot outside of her condo building, exhaustion clear as day on her face. the estimated thirty minute drive from the airport took longer than necessary, something about a sunday afternoon causing tons of traffic. the thought of having to unload all of their luggage and drag it upstairs already exhausted her even more, knowing madison wouldn't be any help. and the fact it had begun to snow, she knew she had to be fast, or else madison would get busy playing in it.

sighing, paige unbuckled herself from her seat, turning off the engine and stepping out of the warmth of her black vehicle and into the chilly atmosphere. she quickly made her way to the trunk of her car, pulling out the two large suitcases they used for the week, along with the several backpacks they used as well. and as if the universe had heard her internally complaining about the load she had to take in on her own, the sound of a familiar, but completely unexpected, scream interrupted her whining.

the blonde looked up hesitantly at where the noise had seemingly come from, unsure if she'd even want to know. however, it was none other than an excited catherine, standing at the porch of paige's condo. the woman had a blanket she definitely pulled off of paige's couch draped over her shoulder in attempt to protect her from the cold, an arm sticking out as she waved down the two girls a few floors down from her.

and then, as soon as she was there, she was gone. paige furrowed her brows, confused at everything that was happening. maybe it was just because she was tired, or maybe the last argument she had with her mom was still heavy on her mental and could've been causing hallucinations.

"was that cat?" madison asked from beside the woman, only further assuring her that it was indeed real.

"i think so?" paige replied just as unsure.

the brunette returned to their sight a few minutes later, an actual jacket on her torso now as she made her way out of the front door to paige's building.

the same excited smile grew across her face as she got closer to the bueckers, her arms opened wide when she saw madison heading towards her.

"maddie!" the woman called out, to madison's surprise. like she didn't know it was catherine until she heard her voice. the girls face mimicked catherine's as she ran over to her, somehow not slipping in the snowy parking lot. catherine crouched down to catch madison in her arms, squeezing her as tight as she could. "oh- i missed you, mamita. how was it? was it fun?"

madison then went on and on about the trip as a whole, down to the snacks she got to eat on the plane ride back to storrs. catherine just nodded enthusiastically as she pulled the girl out of her embrace, letting her finish her story, her active listening skills showing out.

once madison was done with the majority of her story, catherine stood up from her crouch, her eyes finally meeting paige's blue ones. as if they could read right through one another, catherine immediately knew that look on paige's face, knew the reason for the bags under her eyes, and why she looked so relieved to see her.

catherine gave the blonde a smile, a sweet and gentle one.

"hey, p," her voice was much calmer, softer than when she was just talking to madison. "c'mere." she prompted, walking closer to paige until their bodies connected in a hug, her arms coming to wrap around her shoulders naturally, like they had hugged each other every day.

but they didn't hug each other every day.

they never hugged.

paige's brows furrowed momentarily, her hands hesitantly coming up to catherine's back as she held her in the embrace. though she wasn't expecting it, she was not about to complain. a hug from catherine could probably heal the world, and she'd been patiently waiting for her turn.

every time madison was sad, or had an 'owie', she'd run to catherine for a hug. like it was the only thing that could make her feel better. and right now, paige understood and agreed completely. she'd been looking for this hug all week—she needed it.

catherine could've sworn she felt paige melting into the hug, different from the initial tense body she started hugging moments prior. she could tell paige was tired, in need of some support. her weight was heavy and her grip was tighter than either of them realized.

catherine didn't let herself dwell over the fact that paige was hugging her, this being the first time their bodies were this close, and in such an intimate manner. she didn't think too deeply about how a family of butterflies invaded her stomach, or the sense of relief she also felt during their embrace. and god forbid she noticed the way paige's hands slid across her back and waist as she pulled away from the hug, lingering in its place naturally. or the way it left her mind wandering down a dangerous, inappropriate path—she just focused on paige.

pulling away after a few moments passed, catherine give paige a sympathetic smile. "you alright?"

paige nods, a small smile on her lips. "better now that i'm home."

catherine's smile stayed as she looked between the blonde and the small girl next to her. she knew that paige just needed a break, a moment to relax.

"hey, maddie." the woman fully turned towards the five year old, hands falling to her knees as she bent down to be eye level with the girl.

"hm?" madison hummed.

"i have something super fun planned inside!"

the girls eyes widened and lit up, and catherine would have sworn she saw stars in her eyes. madison was always so excited for an adventure, anything new. "what is it?!"

"you gotta go see for yourself!" the brunette replied in a tone that mimicked madison's thrilled one.

madison made her way through the little snow fall, not missing the warnings from paige and catherine to slow down or be careful as she began trekking several feet ahead of them.

as they walked into the bueckers home, a smell that could only be described as christmas lingered, along with music that fit perfectly with the holiday spirit.

it wasn't until then that paige noticed catherine's christmas themed pajama pants. red and green plaid clung comfortably to her legs, and she paired it with a dark, red top. paige cursed herself internally for basically checking catherine out, her eyes moving up and down her body bashfully. she hated how easily entranced she became in the woman's presence. she hated how her body naturally looked that good. and she hated how she could tell catherine wasn't wearing a bra, and how much it made her stomach flip.

or maybe she just hated it because she knew it was so far out of reach. so unattainable. that's when she knew she was in deep.

'cut it out,' paige thought to herself.

madison gasped a few moments after entering her home, excitement rushing through her, though she didn't know what to expect—the sound of christmas jingles enough to rile her up. "what're we doing, cat?"

"we're making christmas cookies!"

madison jumps in excitement, turning to paige swiftly. "oh! oh! mom, can we put up the christmas tree?"

paige smiles down at the girl, glad there was something to snap her out of her thoughts. leave it up to madison to always keep you on your toes.

"yeah, babe, of course."

˚✧.*

the three girls have been standing in paige's kitchen, all focused on something specific to the cookie baking process as they conversed about their week apart.

"what'd you and molly do while you were there? in new york?" paige asked as she began preheating the oven, looking over a recipe she found online.

"nothing much.." the brunette responds, kneading one half of the sugar cookie dough, madison taking her time on the second half. "she took me to the city for a day, it was beautiful. too crowded for me, though."

paige snorted quietly. that sounded like something catherine would say. "you're the only person to go to new york city and expect it not to be crowded."

scoffing, catherine looked past her shoulder momentarily to stare daggers at the blonde, noticing how she began to struggle with the oven. "listen, i love new york," the woman defended, "seriously, if i ever run away, it'll be to new york." she explained, "but i would not live in the city."

"you're such a baby." paige teased, a laugh following her words.

"can you just hand me the damn cookie cutters, please?" catherine dismissed the blondes teasing, shooing her off to do something that wasn't bothering her. "they're in that bag."

paige rummaged momentarily through the brown paper bag that carried all of catherine's favorite baking essentials, but came up short. taking the bag in her hand, she walked over to catherine like a lost child, "they're not in here."

catherine looked up from her cookie dough rolling and into the dark bag, noticing that the christmas themed cookie cutters were indeed not in there.

"shit, i must've left it in the car." she spoke, mainly to herself.

paige watched as the woman began dusting off her hands and placing her utensils down, like she was getting ready to leave.

"i can go get it," the blonde offered quickly, before catherine could get too far.

"oh, it's okay, i can gr—"

"no, let me," paige proposed once more, this time her hand casually falling to the brunettes back, willing her to stay.

as soon as her hand was there, was as soon as it was gone. though, the chills down catherine's spine stayed stagnant, yearning for her to touch her again.

something about being away from each other longer than they were used to made things feel different now that they were back. the amount of times they had shared touches tonight probably would have added up to every single time they've touched ever before.

catherine cleared her throat in attempt to clear her mind at the sound of her car keys jingling, and the front door closing behind paige.

letting out a breath she didn't know she was holding in, the woman began helping madison roll out her cookie dough.

moments passed and madison if now was the right time to talk. "cat?"

"yeah, mama?"

"grandma got upset that i called paigey mom." madison had waited to talk about this, knowing her mom a little too well, not wanting to hurt her feelings or upset her. this setting reminded her of the first time she spoke with catherine about this, and it prompted her to continue it now.

catherine just snorted, having heard all about it already, "did she?"

madison nodded, "yeah, she was really mad at mom."

catherine shrugged, "it's okay, you don't have to worry about it." she assured the girl, giving her a comforting smile, one that always made madison feel at home.

"why does grandma not like it though?" the girl inquired, pushing away a piece of curly hair that fell in front of her face.

the woman shrugged again, "i'm not sure, mama."

madison thought about what she was about to say, quite intelligent for being so little. she let a long moment pass, willing catherine to look up from her cookie dough once more. she had an expecting look on her face, like she knew madison was wanting to say something.

in that moment, paige made her way back. brand new, unopened, pack of cookie cutters in hand as she stopped in her tracks at the silence she walked in on. as if she knew this was meant to be a private conversation, she closed the door softly behind her, creeping slowly down the small corridor before she walked into the kitchen.

"can i call you mom? or would she get mad at that also."

catherine did a double take, not expecting madison to say that at all.

"what?" catherine asked, but she heard the girl loud and clear. her voice was soft, like that instantly made her fragile, and laced in confusion.

"can i call you mom?" the small girl repeated, her voice youthful and full of wonder, not understanding the deepness behind her words.

catherine didn't know it, but paige's face mimicked hers at the moment, glad she listened to her gut feeling about eavesdropping on their conversation.

"oh, mamita.." catherine started, oblivious to the feeling of tears welling up, "i don't.. you can't.." the woman tried, but she came up short. this meant so much to her—madison meant so much to her—but she knew she couldn't just let that happen without paige knowing, something so fragile. "paigey's your mom, okay?" her voice was gentle as she tried to deny the girl as softly as possible. "y'know, she makes your 'owies' feel better, and she reads you your favorite books to sleep, and she loves you."

"you do those things, cat."

the woman internally cursed how smart and aware the girl was. she really was smart.

catherine sighed, giving madison an unsure look. this was the first time she truly had no answer for the girls problems. madison looked back down at her half of the cookie dough, and catherine wasn't sure if she looked sad or not. "i do love you, though." she assured.

madison looked up, her face bright with a smile again. "you do?"

"more than i think i realize."

"what?"

"i just mean that i do really love you." the brunette explained to the girl, "and i love being here with you and paigey, and helping you grow.." she trailed off momentarily, "and i wanna be best friends forever."

"promise we'll be friends forever?" madison asked the woman next to her genuinely, like she'd be afraid that she would disappear if she didn't.

catherine nodded, her face contorting as she fought back tears. "yeah," she nodded, her voice cracking as she reached to pull the girl into a hug. "of course."

they hugged for a moment, catherine doing everything in her power to not cry—or at least let these tears fall—before madison spoke again. "i love you too, cat."

well, so much for not letting the tears fall. the woman wondered if it would be obvious that she had started to cry, immediately reaching to wipe her tears away, sniffling back any snot that dared to leave her nose.

paige stood down the small corridor, once again mimicking catherine's emotions. they were too alike, sometimes, wiping at her own tears. her heart was full and simultaneously hurting. madison cared for catherine more than her small mind could comprehend, and to think that catherine would never be more than a friend (to her or to madison) devastated her to no end.

the sound of the oven beeping took her out of her thoughts, and catherine's comment after that. "where's paigey? the ovens ready for the cookies."

the blonde quickly tiptoed back to the door, opening it loudly this time before shutting it like normal, acting like she had just strolled in. walking in, she found the girls like she left them.

"cookie cutters have arrived," she announced.

"i call the christmas tree ones!" madison called.

˚✧.*

"cat, it's not turning red." madison spoke aloud her dilemma to the woman beside her, mixing away at the pink frosting that she intended to be red. "is it because the frosting is white?"

the brunette nodded, "that's right, you'd need something stronger to make it red."

madison sat back, huffing at all of the work she put in for no outcome. "boo."

catherine just grinned at the girl, then turning to the other side to catch paige really focused on her cookie design. her brows were furrowed and she had been quiet for a good minute now.

"you're serious 'bout that cookie."

paige nodded, still focused as she half answered. "gotta be precise." she mumbled.

peering over to catch paige's.. artwork, catherine snorted lightly.

"what?" paige challenged.

"he looks wonky." the woman admitted about the snowman shaped cookie.

"you look wonky." the blonde insulted back, to which catherine gasped dramatically.

"take that back!"

"aight, aight, i'm sorry." paige apologizes.

catherine should've known better than to think she was being serious, though.

"it's fi—" the brunette cut herself off at the feeling of paige's finger dragging green colored frosting down her nose.

catherine gasped as madison broke out into fits of laughter, and paige awaited her next move. she didn't pay too much attention though because as soon as she started to laugh, catherine was grabbing the bowl of bright, pink frosting madison was once working on and smearing some down the woman's cheek.

the two stared at each other momentarily before going all in.

their faces and arms were covered in different colors of frosting as they continued to fight one another with the sugary substance. even poor madison was eventually pulled onto the battlefield, though she took it like a champ, laughing all the way to the finish line.

"cat!" the blonde giggled, catherine clearly winning their impromptu food fight.

˚✧.*

their frosting fight didn't last too long before madison started crying about getting some in her eye. soon, catherine was wiping her whole face off with a rag and reminding her of her bed time.

"alright, mama, go hop in the shower and head to bed." the brunette instructed once she wiped the last bit of baby blue frosting off of madison's face.

madison was about to protest, but a sudden wave of sleepiness washed over her, and the sound of a yawn leaving her lips rather than an argument was more than enough reason to take the loss.

paige stood their patiently, watching the way the two of them interacted. she thought about much their bond meant to her. how if madison asked to call anyone else their mom, she would immediately feel jealous, or hurt. but not catherine. something about that felt right. it made sense to her.

the blonde wished her daughter a goodnight, leaning down to place a kiss to the top of her head, praying catherine didn't miss any extra frosting in her hair that would be crusted by the morning.

as madison walked off, catherine turned to find paige as messy as she left her, definitely being the sole winner of their frosting match. she giggled once more, the same rag in her hand coming up to start wiping at her face.

"how's it feel to lose?"

"i don't know, i've never lost before in my life." paige answered dramatically, turning her head to help catherine out with her cleanup.

though that didn't last long, the woman before her deciding to throw the rag at her chest, leaving her to clean herself up. "i'm done with you."

the blonde just laughed as she started at her face again, wiping off the streaks of pink as catherine went to wet another rag, cleaning herself up now.

they stood their in comfortable silence as they wiped away any evidence of their childish behavior, paige being the first to finish. she watched catherine wipe at her face, and noticed how she kept missing this one small, spec of bright green frosting that landed just below her bottom lip over and over again.

"can i.." paige attempted, her hand coming up to rest against the woman's face. her thumb swiftly swiped against catherine's plump, bottom lip.

catherine's breath hitched in her throat momentarily, that being the most intimate thing to happen to her in years. every touch they shared today was more than she was used to, and it was beginning to turn her on.

on instinct, catherine slightly caught her bottom lip between her teeth, still looking up towards the slightly taller blonde.

the air was stuffy all of the sudden, neither one of them willing to move or speak first.

they shared a look of understanding—like they both knew what just happened, how the air shifted, and how their eyes were suddenly darker—and it was too late to try to brush it off without acknowledging it.

the feeling of paige's gaze sent chills down the brunette's spine. cocking an eyebrow at her, catherine waited for her to say anything. at this point, she was waiting for her to make a move.

though, she wasn't sure these feelings she kept denying were being reciprocated.

the moment came and went with no verbal communication for a long, quiet minute.

"there, you.. sorry, you just kept missing it." the blonde finally spoke, her hand finally dropping from the woman's face and into her pockets as she felt the sweat begin to pool in her palms. she wondered if catherine could feel it, and it caused her cheeks to grow red.

"oh, uh, thank you."

another long moment of silence washed over them, the tension in the air begging for either of them to speak.

"do you, uh, wanna stay and.. catch up?" paige asked, a tone catherine would only describe as shy in her words, one she had never heard from paige.

catherine was about to say no, attempting to run away from her feelings once again. and then, she heard the unfortunate tone of her best friends voice in her head. "you're not over chris and that's why you don't want to accept that you like paige."

catherine knew she was over that part of her life. and she knew she wanted paige. she needed to stop running. paige had been nothing but sweet and caring to her. and there was something about her that was different. something she'd never experienced or felt with anyone ever before. whether it be just a friendship or something more, catherine knew she didn't want to let the woman go, for she'd grown immensely attached to her and madison.

maybe it took molly's pushy attitude, or having to go so many days apart, but she had finally started to accept it.

she really did like paige.

"yeah.. yeah, i'd love to." catherine spoke breathless, nodding softly.

paige's smile in return was nothing short of the definition of giddy.

chapter sixteen: it's kinda hot.

˚✧.*

the two women were having a great night together, catching up about their weeks apart, and more in depth now that madison wasn't present for it. they shared their feelings about the adversity they were met with, paige more than catherine by a long shot. catherine was a great shoulder to lean on for paige, and paige knew she wouldn't let her be down for long. like when she offered to show her an interpretive dance to some christmas tunes to get a laugh out of her.

paige was sprawled out on her living room couch, sinking into the dark grey cushions, a random blanket balled up behind her head to act like a makeshift pillow. the room was dim, only illuminated by the warm lamp in the corner and the t.v. right in front of her.

a smile tugged at her lips as she watched the show catherine was putting on in front of her. the woman was still clad in her christmas pajama pants, still sad deep down that paige wouldn't match with her for the time being. a half empty wine glass sat comfortably in her hand as she danced, paige praying to god that she didn't spill any of it on her nice carpets.

"okay, and then you do this.. 'feliz navidad.'" the brunette sang dramatically, pacing the living room, her bare feet shuffling against the soft carpet beneath her.

paige just snorted, closing her eyes momentarily as she shook her head at the ridiculousness in front of her. a look of adoration played on her face like she was entranced, grinning at catherine. "no way you're doing this right now."

catherine totally dismissed her statement, her focus now on the blonde before her. the woman inched closer to her, eventually letting her palms rest against the small coffee table separating them right now. she leaned in closer, examining paige. her face must've replicated the curiosity in her mind, because paige's brows quickly furrowed, nervous at why the energy had just shifted, almost pulling back when catherine leaned in. "what?"

catherine's face softened instantly at her words, grinning down at paige. half thinking about what she would say next, she shook her head. "your eyes look so pretty in this lighting."

that was only part of their activities for the night. they shared the cookies they made earlier, sure to not eat too many so madison could enjoy some the next day, trading in their alcohol for a cold glass of milk (paige going the extra mile and making hers chocolate).

they dared one another to go outside into the cold, snowy storrs night with no jacket on to see who could last the longest—spoiler alert, it was paige.

and the other made catherine question whether or not she wanted want to runaway all over again.

paige was hovering over the light purple suitcase she had just hauled onto her clean sheets, rummaging through the clothes and accessories she had in there from her trip to montana that week. she knew if she didn't tackle it now, she never would.

her knees lightly tapped against the black bed frame each time she leaned in to pull out an item of clothing, folding them semi-neatly if they were clean or throwing it into her hamper if the opposite. she focused in on this little task, leaving her and catherine to sit in comfortable silence outside of the christmas music they could hear still playing in the living room.

the woman looked up from her chore to find catherine slowly walking around her room, arms crossed naturally over her chest. a smile played on her plump lips as she took in all the little details paige encouragingly incorporating into her small, personal space: pictures and polaroids of her loved ones framed or hung up along her off white wall and dark dresser, her small book collection of strictly romance novels that rested comfortably on her minimalistic bookshelf that azzi got her into, her choice of dark blue bedding that had a small uconn husky specifically stitched into the left corner of it—everything.

"you're so cute." the brunette called out from the other side of the bed, which made paige look up quickly. her eyes would have widened and her stomach would have dropped had she not caught catherine looking at a picture of her when she was about seven years old, sporting a clearly oversized football jersey. that quickly calmed her thoughts.

"thanks." the blonde chuckled out, looking back down at the last few pieces of items she had to return to her living space from her luggage.

catherine continued to snoop, really taking in every picture paige had hung up on her dresser. she recognized the woman's teammates in a lot of them, and a woman in one that she assumed to be paige's mom. they had the same smile. and she couldn't help but notice the one of her and madison sitting together at the park near the woman's condo.

it was a selfie catherine took a little over a month ago that she had sent to paige as a mid day update, having known she probably wouldn't have seen her daughter that day.

it made her heart flutter. she really was apart of their lives now, and she played an important role. and something about seeing her face in a framed photo with her favorite person in the whole world in the bedroom of her other favorite person (in the whole world) sort of solidified that in her mind.

but, what really got her was a picture of paige and madison right after the girl was born. it was an intimate photo, one paige probably didn't show everybody she ever met or would talk about madison to. she was holding newborn madison, sunk into her hospital bed and gown, smiling down at her daughter. it brought tears to catherine's eyes, gasping lightly.

"oh.." her voice was soft, genuine. paige looked up, wondering what photo catherine was looking at now. but, by her reaction, she almost knew which one. "que lindas.." the woman spoke out loud with her native tongue, complimenting the girls in the picture, picking up the framed photo to examine closer.

paige was about to ask what that meant, but the other question that had been on her mind quite a lot poked first. "where's your accent from?"

catherine looked up from the picture in her hands, gently placing it back into its respective place. she cleared her throat so her words didn't come out as small as they wanted. "puerto rico.." she trailed off, cheeks growing a light shade of red that looked almost dark pink against her skin. "you can hear it?"

the blonde shrugged, lips pursing as she thought to herself. "it's faint. comes out a little when you speak spanish."

catherine began to fight with herself mentally, hating that anybody could hear it. to her, it sounded bad, out of place. she needed to watch what she would say. but being around paige and madison just felt so comfortable and normal she would not even think twice about half the things she said or did. "god, that's embarrassing."

paige shrugged once more, disagreeing with her statement, shaking her head. "it's kinda hot."

the woman simply laughed, true and genuine, throwing her head back once in amusement. those were honestly the last words she expected to hear from her.

"fuck, are you drunk?" she asked seriously, though she was still chuckling. something about paige saying that to her face completely sober just didn't add up in her mind, especially knowing how she was when she was under the influence.

"not anymore. wine isn't as strong as i thought."

shaking her head, trying to distract them both from that comment, mainly so she wouldn't blush, catherine started to brew together a joking insult to lighten the mood. "weird. for such a big person, you're such a lightweight."

"what the fuck do you mean 'big person'?" the blonde asked, jokingly offended, as she slid the now empty suitcase off of her bed, rolling it over to an open corner in her room.

catherine scoffed like it wasn't an obvious fact, hands coming up to rest on her exposed waist. "jeez, p, i mean—two dirty shirley's and you're gone."

"you're literally a liar!" paige countered, voice high pitched, unable to believe the playful teasing coming her way. she made her way over to catherine, sitting at the edge of her bed.

catherine's brows shot up, a challenging look on her face. "should i remind you of the first night we met."

"cat, you swore we wouldn't talk about it." paige warned, a finger coming up to hang in the air like it would pause the woman's thoughts, make her forget about what she was about to say. "plus, you put double shots." she explained to her defense.

however, catherine didn't hear any of that, a playful grin on her face as she thought about the fire she was going to start.

slightly inching towards the blonde, who was now fully sat at the edge of her bed, legs spread apart just a little, her feet planted on the ground, her voice dramatically mimicked paiges. "'you have such a great body, cat.'"

the woman simply shook her head, not willing to let her laugh come out. and she prayed that the heat now rising through her body at the reminders of how she first felt

for catherine wouldn't show up against her pale cheeks, her palms already growing sweaty.

"'mm, cat, that's such a cute name.'" the brunette continued, determined to get paige to crack. though this time, instead of trying to sound like paige, she put on her best, funny impression of a seductive voice, this making paige even more embarrassed.

"catherine!" paige pulled out the full name, begging her to stop. she couldn't believe this was happening.

"ah, cat, come meet me in the bathroom."

the blonde finally laughed out loud, shaking her head back and forth, waving a hand in the space between the two. "i didn't say that, you freak."

catherine scoffed, "me the freak? can you even recall the name of the girl you actually hooked up with in the bathroom that night?" she challenged once again.

to which paige had no answer for her, dismissing her completely. "oh, you wanna know about my sex life?" she challenged. "very personal."

the brunette rolled her eyes at her dismissal, though she was actually want to hear about her sex life, prompting her next response. "yeah, actually."

paige just shook her head, her turn to dismiss catherine, "get outta here.. acting like i was thirsting over you or sum."

"you so were."

paige's tongue met her front teeth, sucking against them and looking away, hiding her embarrassment. "was not. i'm just a nice person, thought you shoulda known."

catherine rolled her eyes, attempting to turn back and face the army of photos she had been observing. then, suddenly, a wave of confidence she didn't normally feel unless she was working the bar took over. though, it didn't come out as confident, more so just bold. especially since she was shyly looking away. "what else, then?"

paige furrowed her brows, taking a sip of the chocolate milk she had been lugging around with her all night, before reaching over to leave it on the nightstand where her lamp was, that being their only source of light. smacking the taste against her tongue one time, she asked, "'what else' what?"

maybe she got too ahead of herself. it could've been the wine from earlier, or the undeniable signs throughout their day together that they were both feeling the same, but she wanted to know for sure. she needed to know. "what else do you think."

even paige was unfamiliar with this kind of attitude from catherine, the shift in her tone and attitude clear as day. it was the kind that attracted her to the woman the first night they met. it made her cheeks grow hot, though it could've just been the wine. or maybe that was just an excuse. she wasn't sure what she wanted her mind to think.

"'bout you?" the woman asked, her tone more confident though she was nervous, both her and catherine's body language and tone of voice contradicting how they felt inside.

catherine simply nodded with a light hum. "mhm."

"for real?" paige asked again, and catherine nodded once more. she was genuinely curious now.

"i mean.. you're great with maddie." she started, her sweaty palms now feeling like pools the more she thought about her feelings for catherine in depth. for a moment, she clasped her hands together, before ultimately opting to let them fall at her sides, holding herself up against the soft bedding.

catherine wanted to roll her eyes, probably a reaction from the anxiety she was starting to feel. paige simply had to have more to say than that. and if she didn't—if all paige saw her as was a caregiver to madison—then catherine needed to reevaluate her feelings.

the brunette simply just cleared her throat softly, stepping back to lean against the dresser behind her. "that all?"

the blonde gently shook her head, soft eyes looking at the woman before her. "you're.. genuine."

catherine nodded, willing paige to keep going. to fulfill the need she was feeling. 'just say it' she begged internally.

"and smart. and caring." paige continued.

"that's it?" the woman asked one more time, though it came out more desperate and needy than whiny, her tone completely giving her away. paige playing hard to get was only further stressing out catherine.

paige quirked an eyebrow as her eyes shifted, something in them turning dark and catherine couldn't help but notice. her lips tugged into a small smirk, and her voice dropped an octave or two. "what do you want me to say?"

her voice was teasing, but not the way catherine was familiar with. no, something much more dangerous, intense and intimate. one that would send her home thinking about it for days and cursing herself for feeling so turned on by it.

and suddenly that need for paige—in her mind, her heart, and another place that need not be mentioned—was even closer to being satisfied.

the way she looked right now, the way she spoke, it was everything catherine had ever needed. she needed her. she wanted paige to stop playing. to just say how she felt. it was hypocritical because she herself couldn't even do it, but paige's hesitation only psyched her out more.

catherine took a deep breath, needing to steady her thoughts. they were going far too left, she needed to ground herself. but, man, was it hard. she sighed before she shook her head, "nothing.." she admitted, allowing their moment to die, turning back towards the dark colored dresser to finish up her snooping.

paige's face dropped at that, thinking they were finally about to get somewhere. that either of them were about to break, reveal the obvious. she then wondered why she herself hadn't made any moves yet. though she thought she was being the most obvious out of the two—and catherine only being obvious because she wasn't aware of how clearly she was showing her feelings—why couldn't she make herself tell catherine how she felt?

maybe she didn't want to mess anything up. catherine was consistent. something- someone in her life, in madison's life, that would always be there. and how she was with madison, their bond, it was like no other. a real, genuine connection that they shared that even paige herself couldn't wrap her head around. she couldn't possibly ruin that.

then again, what if something better came from this? paige had never even taken the time to think about settling down, though she knew she'd have to, and she'd want to one day, especially not so young and so fresh into her career. but, thoughts like these left her pondering. left her hoping.

"tell me." paige insisted, not willing to let this moment, their moment, vanish.

"paige.." the brunette trailed off, shaking her head lightly, turning on her heel to face the woman. she regretted the boldness she was feeling earlier and what it lead her to do. now, things felt more real. though it had all gone mostly unspoken, it was pretty clear. "you know i can't."

"why not?" paige pushed. this was the farthest they had ever gotten, and considering this was almost nothing, she had to keep trying. "c'mon, cat."

"it's not that easy." the woman spoke matter of factly, trying to hide how she felt with a plain face. paige could always see right through her, though.

"it can be." she stood from her spot on the bed, inching towards catherine. catherine's eyes followed paige, trailing up once she was fully standing, those few inches she had on her feeling a lot more powerful in this setting.

catherine's arms folded over her chest naturally, eyes still following the blonde coming closer, and closer. she was sure paige could hear her breath hitch in her chest, like she knew exactly what to expect.

in a swift, smooth motion, paige allowed her hand to creep up to catherine's face. slightly calloused fingers came up to hold her cheek, the blonde praying that her hands weren't still sweaty. thumb swiping against her cheekbone, she admired her face. that damn face that always made her melt. never leaving her mind, no matter what she did. her long fingers stretched across the woman's cheek, her hand sliding slightly upward, gently scratching against her scalp.

catherine's eyes shut instinctively at paige's touch, something about this new feeling already so comfortable, leaning into her. the woman sighed with a hum, one paige wanted to place as a soft moan vibrating in the back of her throat. she then let her arms drop from her chest, a gesture that was now symbolic, almost like how she was slowly letting her walls down.

"fuck, stop running from me." the woman pleaded, eyes soft, her tone hushed and raw, though it was meant to be endearing.

she didn't want catherine to disappear again. after their week apart, and the period when catherine was m.i.a. for a brief two weeks, it was the last thing she'd ever want. she couldn't handle catherine not being in her life, not even for a little bit. she wanted catherine around for everything, all the time, for the rest of her and madison's life.

catherine frowned. she couldn't see, her eyes still closed, but she could hear how emotional paige was just from those words. her tone, needy and affectionate, it made her knees weak.

"cat?" paige spoke gently. catherine's eyes, now doe, fluttered open, looking up at paige through her lashes. a small pout lied on her lips and she couldn't help but feel small, childish. paige was breaking down her walls, and fast, and she didn't know what to do.

their eyes met, and catherine knew paige was asking her a question through them. she wanted her to say something, anything.

but alas, catherine was running, after deliberately being asked not to.

"i don't know what to say." the brunette admitted, a frown playing on her plump lips. sad at how bad she was at not only accepting her feelings, but understanding them and being able to express them. catherine sighed, looking away from the blonde before her. "maybe we should call it a night. i'll sleep on the c—"

fortunately, catherine could never finish that statement.

paige's soft lips had met catherine's in a hushed and hurried manner, not wanting to hear the next excuse catherine was doing to ride with this time. not wanting to let her feelings for catherine go no where. not wanting to let their moment go.

the blonde had leaned down into the kiss, pulling catherine into her more and more, tilting her head up just slightly. her one hand rested comfortably between her cheek and the back of her head, while her free one opted to fall to her waist.

catherine's hands fell to paige's waist, still secured in the hoodie she had worn traveling back to storrs earlier that day. she wasn't sure if she wanted to smile into her or pull back.

the brunette was surprised to find herself kissing back in the first place, normally being the type to freeze up. the taste of the wine on her tongue and the chocolate milk on paige's creating an odd but addictive taste.

the kiss was enough to make her mind go mush, and almost completely forget about what she was about to say in the first place. however, it wasn't yet strong enough to keep her anxiety at bay.

pulling away almost frantically, catherine wondered. "fuck, what're you doing?" the woman asked, breathless.

the blonde just looked at her, a look in her eyes catherine has definitely never seen before, not willing to move her hands off of her.

"shutting you up." paige stated, matter of factly, just as out of breath, before she pulled catherine into her again.

authors note!

the things i'd do for some chocolate milk right now. anyways,

EEEEEEKKKKKKK!!!

finally, i've been dying for them to kiss for forever. it's about fucking time—now fuck😛 ugh honestly though i'm so excited, i just wanna write them for the rest of my life, im emotionally attached and invested LMAO

but, as per usually, tell me all of your thoughts! i know i always say this, but your comments are my favorite, and they give me so much motivation!!

thank you for reading! love yall!🩷

- mari 🫧

7.4k words.

#the nanny #paige bueckers #paige bueckers fic #paige bueckers smut #uconn wbb #wlw #lesbian #fanfic

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sweettartsbeboth · 2 days ago

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But also, Kakuzu would adore this weird business man. Like, another person who actually understands profit margins???? Sign him up!

I am now also trying to imagine all the other akatsuki reactions to this Very Nice Man.

nagato and konan are both definitely in tears like 5 minutes after they meet him.

Itachi would be somewhat terrified, because no one is just this nice!?!? Right!?!? Kagaya would also probably be way too sympathetic about the whole terminal disease thing for itachis comfort lol

Sasori and hidan I got no clue about, but they probably get pulled in somehow

Kisame is just down to clown, so this weird civilian guy is alright in his books!

Zetsu is all about rage, yes? So I can imagine kagaya kinda viewing him like sanemi in a way? And it somehow working?

Anyway, I can somehow see kagaya turning the ninja of amegakure into a slayer corps style defense force, but more police like than military? Which makes itachi even more conflicted because he remembers his clan's police force, but sees how this new 'corp' works so much better? Though this is probably just my desire for a deconstruction of the ninja village system lol

If the two daughters also got brought along, I can totally see them deciding to mess with some of the ninja by using total concentration breathing to do ninja level feats, while not having any chakra

Ok so I love demon slayer, I love naruto, I love crossovers and I do think that the most interesting crossover you could get between the two is by including Kagaya Ubuyashiki as a major player

In Narutoland, leaders are leaders due to strength. The Kage's are the strongest around, and it makes sense bc in a warrior society ofc you want your leaders to be strong.

Kagaya is very much not that, and I wanna play with it. There's just something so fascinating ab the leader of so many scarily strong people being a soft spoken and kind man who physically could not fight if he wanted to, but is still willing to embrace The Horrors when need be. Really big contrast to Naruto, I like it

Anyways umm

Fic where after Kagaya Ubuyashiki blows up his fucking house w the wife and kids, he and maybe also the wife and kids end up zapped to Naruto.

Immediatley like, there is no Muzan here. There are no demons. Kagaya's curse to bear is over, the weight lifted from his shoulders. He has done all that he can do. He gets to retire now.

So just Kagaya trying to settle in to retirement in another world, struggling w the fact that he's like. Penniless now. Sickly young master lost all his fucking wealth and buisness investments, not much he can do there.

But no matter what he does he's too fucking charismatic and eye catching to not gain some kind of notoriety. I think it'd be funny if he's legit trying to live his best life but people keep swearing allegiance to him. He's just wandering around trying to find a way to make money and not die and accidentally picking up Deidara before Akatsuki can.

He like compliments his art by acknowledging that there is beauty in everything, even destruction. And Deidara is eyeing him like ",,,maybe this old man is ok,, I guess,,, oh no wait he's a CIVILIAN?? And also fucking useless at everything???? Man I guess I HAVE to stick around and protect him. Wow what a bummer. I guess I have no choice... and also if he pats me on the head and calls me a good boy and feeds into my many ignored complexes then that's also whatever......"

Kagaya actually just keeps running into Akatsuki members and getting varying levels of "this guy is alright I guess (if anything happened to him I'd kill everyone in the room then myself)"

He's collecting a little army of shinobi with daddy issues (every shinobi ever let's be real) by pure accident

Dw Kagaya, you don't need to worry about those medical bills bc u are now the sugar baby of multiple criminal organizations! (Don't think about it too hard)

Obito gets the worst of it, he sees Kagaya and gets flashbacks to his ailing grandmother and suddenly can't unsee it. Kagaya seems to see through his Tobi act seamlessly, and still reaches out to touch his scarred face without a single twitch of his smile and says he can feel a good man in that heart of his. Obito explodes immediatley and has to retreat for 7-10 buisness days to deal with the sudden onslaught of Feelings(tm)

Akatsuki slowly becomes good bc Kagaya learns of some of their plans and gives Obito a dissaproving frown and the psychic damage is so strong that Obito immediatley goes "ok I guess we don't HAVE to kill the children." And he just frowns harder and Obito twitches and goes ",,, or the adults. I guess. If u really think so."

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #kagaya ubuyashiki #naruto #crossover #akatsuki

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evillinuxuser · 11 hours ago

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Dear American leftist.

So you want to make the world better. Please here me out.

You recognize that your parties are ultimately just capitalist racists/sexists/lgbt-phobes and capitalist collaborators/copagandists/war criminals. You want to tear this system to the ground (understandably), just have a revolution and build a new one, a democratic-socialist utopia.

That's not gonna happen yet.

Most Americans want to make the world better. But they will not agree with you on the means or even the end goal.

And you *can't have a revolution* without widespread support (or at least most people not being outright hostile to your end goal - the dirty word socialism). Your current representative system is going to remain for some time still. Your president will have power and they will have the largest and most dangerous power over minorities and marginalized people.

It is important who gets to wield this power.

It is important who gets to appoint the next Supreme Court justices. Even if Democrats don't really care about abortion rights and are just using it as a talking point - their appontees consistently rule in favor of women. This applies equally to race and LGBT issues, and to the legislative and executive branches.

On Palestine and lesser evils

I feel like the most important or one of the most important reasons for leftists who do not vote is the situation in Gaza and independence for Palestine and the lack of action on part of the Dems.

I will not actually talk policy here because even if you think both will do equally bad things for Palestine, you just cannot reason that this means both parties are equal or equally bad. Let me draw you a table (tumblr doesn't have tables?):

How the fuck is there no lesser evil here?

If you do not vote for Dems for the sake of your conscience, you are either a coward who is too immature to make hard decisions or you plain *do not care* for LGBT people, women, PoC, or immigrants.

(Footnote: Dems wont solve your existing racism problems. But people will suffer due to government inaction rather than government WANTING them to suffer and actively using its resources to create more suffering)

You're the guy in the trolley problem NOT pulling the lever to save four lives. Sure, it would be PREFERRABLE if there were no PEOPLE TIED TO THE TRACKS. But they are right now and the state of being tied to a track is called marginalization.

Voting third party does not help.

Your system is rigged against you to allow only two parties.

See this video for explanation.

youtube

By not voting, or voting third party, you are saving no one (except your own conscience, selfishly). Vote and then do some more actually useful stuff.

How the fuck does voting impact your ability to organize politically in other ways? Do you think low voter turnout will somehow convince both Reps and Dems that actually, they're both illegitimate and willing to give way to a new system now? Obviously not?!

So you want to make the world better. This is not what US elections are for. They are for slowing down the world getting worse. Thanks for reading all of that. Sincerely, and in a deep worry tumblr user evillinuxuser (Not an American)

#us #politics #us politics #leftism #socialism #election #election 2024 #us elections #donald trump #kamala harris #vote #social justice #Youtube

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brrrkdslek · 2 days ago

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a moment of vulnerability

SYNOPSIS ✶ "nothing haunts us like the things we don't say." –unknown

PAIRING ✶ ateez x 9th member! male! reader

GENRE ✶ ot9 au, angst to comfort

WARNINGS ✶ trauma, deadbeat father, death

YINGLES' NOTE ✶ guess who's back after almost half a year lamaoaooa

it's practice time once again. you've- well, all of ateez have been darting all over the place from the company to interviews to music shows, and you haven't been able to catch a break.

you desperately want to calm the raging sea in your heart, but the other members have it hard as well, so what benefit would it bring if you were to vent and rant to anyone of the members?

not to mention how composed hongjoong and seonghwa has been, you can't fall behind them, you just can't.

so what you plan to do is just get it over with, hurry up with practice and go back to the dorms to finally rest on your nice and fluffy pillows.

"... and three, four and five- wooyoung, you're supposed to be over here." you mark blankly as you point to the left side behind you where an empty space was.

"oh, crap- sorry noona, i can't seem to get these steps right..." wooyoung chuckles dryly, trying to lighten up the mood despite your stern and unmoving expression.

"no, i feel you. noona, don't you think you should slow down a bit...?" san offered, not wanting to touch a nerve. "i agree," seonghwa piqued, "maybe we should take a break first, i think you need one too m/n."

the man smiled gently as the members all went over to the water bottles and began to drink their beverages. you tapped your feet against the floorboard and bit your nails, they've already became rough and callous from how much your teeth has been abusing them over the weeks.

"hyung? i just wanna ask-" yeosang cuts himself off when he sees you sweating profusely and lips becoming paler, "h-hey, you okay?" his face contorts into one of worry.

you came back to your senses before clearing your throat, "sorry yeo, what's— what did you need?" you ask again. "as i was saying..." yeosang begins slowly, though his expression holds one of worry and suspicion.

practice, shows, recording.

that's all you had to get done under this month, it's only started but you can't seem to relax. it's only three simple words but somehow you found the actions more complex and annoying. you also can't seem to focus on yeosang's question.

you began to sweat again as your heart rate sped up, why were you feeling so stressed? why are they all lounging as if we're on vacation?

you couldn't wrap your head around it, and you couldn't calm your raging breaths either. as yeosang waited for a response, his tongue darts out to wet his lips before he asks once again, waving a hand in front of your face.

the action makes your head spin even more. you wanted him to stop, your mouth opening and closing but no words come out. you felt a migraine slowly come but you just weren't able to find your voice.

suddenly you slap his hand away, the loudness of the skin collision makes yeosang shocked, along with the other members who turned their head upon the sound.

and for a moment, it was silent. everyone had the same thought running through their heads, including yours. 'he has never raises his hand against any of us.'

"fuck- sorry yeo, are you okay...?" you ask nervously as you reached out, only for the man to pull further back, the action alone makes your heart break, but further when his soft eyes stare at you in fear.

hongjoong steps up and pats yeosang's shoulder as his stinging hand falls to his side awkwardly, "hey, what's going on?" the man asks, not really able to comprehend the situation as of now.

your mind drifts back to an instagram reel you saw a few nights ago. 'the abused becomes the abuser', 'the manipulated becomes the manipulator'.

was that possible? were you really evolving- no, devolving, into him? that wretched man who clung to your blood like a parasite, the man that made you worse and better than you ever were before.

your fa- "hey m/n!" hongjoong snaps a finger in your face, bringing you back to reality. "what's going on? you okay? do you need something?" the bombard of questions makes your head spin.

you stumble back and hold onto the rail, surprising all the members as you began to pant, hand going to hold your head from your swirling thoughts.

stress, anxiety, worry.

stress, anxie- wait, are you even breathing? could you breathe? god, the air in here is so stuffy — the practice room was smaller than you imagined now that you looked at it seriously.

ugh, your stomach was churning really badly. did you even eat enough this morning? no- i mean how could you? how could you possibly stomach food when you're having a panic attack?

panic attack...?

you dry heaved before your hand comes up to cup over your mouth, eyes scanning the now blurry members who were slowly coming closer before you rushed out of the practice room and threw up in the middle of the hall by the wall.

you slid down on your knees your breakfast and all the bullshit you ate from yesterday hits the ground, leaving your stomach empty, just like your head now.

you wiped the spit from your lips and swallowed, the bitter taste of barf filling your tongue as your face cringes and mind swirling.

upon seeing the figures of your members rushing towards the hallway, your eyes gave out before you passed out onto the ground.

enveloped in darkness, you saw a silhouette of a woman, your mother. you could always recognise her from anywhere, not because of the pink she always adorned — well, maybe. but you could never perfectly describe the reason why.

everyone's always complimented how similar you two looked, and you always became happy when that comment came.

you wanted to be just like her — so you grew out your hair, changed your personality and acted in line. that wasn't the real reason, but it was what you told your members.

maybe it was because deep in the back of your mind, you knew the blood of your deadbeat father ran in your blood, and that there was a possibility- even if it was 1%, that you would end up like him.

you hated the revelation, so in your delusion, you changed yourself, not for the better, but not for the worse either. still, you didn't know.

blood determines nothing. that is a fact itself with the way your father acts and treats you. in his eyes, you are nothing but scum. despite holding the family name and are able to pass the bloodline, he hated you and you never knew why.

though as you grew older, the more he'd raise his hand at you and hold violence as a more superior solution than anything else, that was his way, and you hated it to the bone.

your position now as an idol determines nothing either, it's not guaranteed. no matter how good of a company you come from, a little slip up could let decades of hard work spill down the drain.

just like your little hoobae seunghan, poor boy. he had so much waiting for him just to get thrown out last minute, you weren't sure why but you felt it would happen to you eventually.

maybe because it has happened to you already — not in the exact same way, but gosh did it leave the same traumatic scar it probably left seunghan too.

you wanted to become a writer, a famous one at that. you found comfort in the little letters you'd write on your notebook, creating different stories and scenarios that filled your heart with ease.

your mother was supportive and loved to read some of the short fictions you'd let her read. always giving you that sweet pat on the head and telling you how proud she was.

you looked up to her, amazed at how perfectly she held herself, despite the familial environment your father put you guys through.

but you found out she wasn't as strong as you thought, when she killed herself in the summer of 2012, when you were only 13 year old.

after then, you stopped writing all together. her words suddenly becoming empty when you thought back to it; if she could lie about her feelings, she could lie about her words too.

you never realised, but the pent up hatred for your mother was never hatred in the first place. you only ever felt guilty for not being mature enough for her to express her deepest feelings to you, even if you were only 13.

suddenly, your eyes shot open as a tear rolled down your temple from where you laid. you glanced around the room and recognised it to be your own, with an iv drip connecting to your arm.

before long, jongho comes in with a glass of water and almost drops it when you wake up. he places the glass down gently before sitting at your side.

his eyes are full of worry as they dart all over you, thinking about what to do or say. "jjongie..." you started, though you let out a few coughs at how dry your throat have gotten.

jongho immediately helps you sit up and drink the water, downing the whole glass in one go, almost making the maknae crack a smile if not for your worrying condition.

as he placed the glass down, the man sighs. "...are you ever gonna tell us what happened back there?" he asks slowly, almost sounding ashamed that's the first thing he says to you since you woke up.

but you only blinked before turning to stare up at the ceiling, "eventually, yeah— but what day is it?" you ask instinctively, feeling as if along time had passed.

"it's been a day..." the man replied with a gulp, remembering how fearful all the members were when the doctor says you'll be resting for a while.

you hummed and opened your mouth to speak before your door practically breaks down with the way wooyoung rushed in with tears in his eyes.

"HYUNG!" the man-baby exclaims as he kneels by your bedside and wails on your lap, "oh my god, you're alive!" he cries like a baby as yunho flicks his head, "hey don't jinx it."

a tiny smile graces your lips as you gently ran your fingers through the man's hair, bringing his ever-lasting comfort, just like how your mother has always made you feel.

in just a second, all the members have successfully poured into your room like roaches. and as you caught yeosang, he comes closer at your silent message.

"are you still hurt?" you ask slowly as your free hand caressed the back of his hand, where you'd slap. you knew it didn't hurt, the man could carry two of you without breaking a sweat.

but you just felt like you should ask — you knew mother would've asked if it was here, and the thought alone makes a small smile creep up your lips.

"i'm okay, but are you?" he asks as he takes your hand in his and squeezes it reassuringly, "i think so." you chuckle, suddenly feeling so warm just with the upbeat chattering of your members.

you sigh shakily before bringing yeosang close and hugging the man in your arms. you gently raked your fingers through his hair as your eyes watered.

"hyung's sorry, i never meant to hurt you..." you whispered shakily, the guilt of that painful face yeosang made a day ago making your chest tighten.

the man simply smiled shyly and hugs back, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck as he replies in a muffled voice. "it's okay, noona. i know you didn't mean it..."

hearing the common nickname of 'noona' makes you release the breath you didn't know you were holding as you sniffled gently before kissing the man's temple.

mingi chuckles, "guys, look at yeosang blush." wooyoung raises his head from where his tears stained your lap before he snorted, "he's bright red!"

yeosang blushes harder and yanks himself away from you in embarrassment. "am not! your eyes are redder than mine, you're the one who's crying like a little kid."

you smile upon the familiar scene of the boys bickering and bantering amongst each other, it's refreshing, seeing your members so relaxed and happy.

hongjoong sitting at your side catches your attention before you turn back towards him with a kind smile and he smiles back, what a captain.

"you don't have to tell us what's going on, but just know that we're here for you if you ever need us." he marks before grasping your hand and intertwining your fingers without anyone noticing.

"even though i'd like it to be only me," the man jokes, making you snort softly, "everyone else here loves you just the same, so don't keep everything bottled up."

a sudden laugh leaves your lips as the members go silent, turning to watch you with curiosity as you laugh your heart out, warming their hearts as well.

'if only mother was surrounded by this much love back then, maybe she would've been able to see me grow into the writer she hoped i'd become.'

#brrrkdslek 📁: oneshots #brrrkdslek 🖇️: 9th member m/n #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #san x reader #seonghwa x reader #wooyoung x reader #hongjoong x reader #jongho x reader #yeosang x reader #yunho x reader #mingi x reader

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