#some of this headcanons are mine

[kosssich]

A little while back you made a Vaggie headcanon post, and I was wondering if you’d be interested in doing the same for your Charlie. I think she just looks the coolest in your style, and I’d love to hear everything you have to say about her, if you’d want to, of course.

actually, i realy like this idea. honestly, i wanted to make such post myself, just when i posted about vaggie, but charlie is like, far from my favorite, and i was like "meh", but when you asked and why not? if you're intrested, sure!

so, have some of my thoughts

- Fluffy girl. She has a goat coat. And goat-like features in general - hooves, ears, horns, tail.

- She’s a top. fight me.

- She has also a sweet tooth. You know that huge ass milka? I bet she and Vaggie eat that in one row

- Low self esteem and absolutely awful abandonment issues

- Her blood is deep red with beautiful little streams of gold. Her father’s legacy. Truly unique

- Charlie grew up locked in the mansion, far away from the awful life of sinners in the circle of Pride. "The Princess trapped in the tower"

- When Lilith disappeared, Charlie and Lucifer's relationship has deteriorated dramatically, Charlie moved into a Hotel. And so, with the beginning of a free, independent life, she had the opportunity to get to know her people better - to help them

- But expectations are not always met. People are... complicated. And sinners are even more complicated and contradictory. Her help turned against her

- For the first year, Charlie hated sinners. Ungrateful, disgusting bastards who only care about themselves. "You were right, Mother, Father. I hate them. I hate them. I hate them!”. She was ready to give up everything, fall on her knees in front of Lucifer, beg for forgiveness, beg that he would allow her to return to the palace

- One year she hated… The second… She observed. Why are they like that? What motivates them? What are they capable of? Can those broken souls be redeemed?

- In the third year, she stumbled upon a sinner. A sinner who showed her that maybe this stupid, immature idea of redemption was real. A sinner who, in response to salvation, offered Charlie her unwavering loyalty, her support, and eventually… her love

[ollieartie]

I promise I'm alive just...really bogged down with stuff 😅

I was thinking about those celebration moments in One Piece and then the Miriam dance song and well...here we are

[steddiehyperfixation]

hc that steve actually likes metal and listens to it regularly, just always pretty quietly. so when eddie, who never has his stereo turned down to anything below 40 and even that's too quiet sometimes, gets in steve's car one day to hear metallica playing through the speakers with the volume only set to like 7, he's immediately torn between being ecstatic that steve is listening to one of his favorite bands and outrage that he's not giving it the proper listening experience it deserves

[machveil]

Simon Riley that likes to play Minecraft at midnight when he can’t sleep

Simon Riley is so used to giving and receiving orders as Ghost. he appreciates sandbox games since there’s no structure, he can turn his brain off just walk around or farm. isn’t the best at building, but he’ll try his best

Simon Riley usually ends up building a house into the side of a hill or mountain. he only has to worry about making one side of a house then - and it doesn’t have to be the best, all the important stuff is inside. Simon absolutely loves sitting down and mining, specifically strip mining. when he strip mines he can just go on autopilot, eyebrows raising slightly when he bumps into ores and valuables

Simon Riley that has personal beef with mountain goats and powder snow. he absolutely hates going into snowy biomes because he’s died so many times getting stuck in powder snow blocks. he’s also been rammed into by goats, he’ll avoid them at all costs

Simon Riley that likes to play on peaceful. he doesn’t mind other difficulties, but he’d rather not have to worry about aggressive mobs. he’s content to sit for an hour or two mining and organizing chests. he refuses to make automatic farms because that doesn’t feel fun to him - he’s perfectly fine chopping trees and making small chicken farms

[cosmicsodaz]

[amerricanartwork]

RW Headcanon: How Arti Gives Back

In the RW community on this site, I’ve heard quite a few Artimand thoughts about how Gourmand would help Artificer heal from her trauma and grief. And while that’s all good, something that’s continuously puzzled me when shipping Artimand romantically is, ���but how would Artificer help Gourmand?”

Let me tell you, one of my all-time favorite qualities in a ship is the characters helping each other improve themselves, especially in ways no other character pairing can. And while it’s easy to see Gourmand helping Artificer improve, given the vast amount of grief and lust for vengeance she has to overcome, and since Gourmand probably has a natural inclination to help others in need, what would she give to him in return? And to add to that, why would Gourmand fall in love with her and choose her as a mate, as opposed to just casually looking out for her and straight pitying her at worst, especially when she’d most-likely appear very un-qualified for romance initially?

Well, I’ve developed some thoughts and headcanons for that, and I’ll put them below the cut! Please let me know if anything could be improved, or if you can add to it! I’d love more reasons to think of these two sweethearts!

Option 1: Combat

Arti would help Gourmand improve his combat skills. The way I see it, Gourmand is a very strong warrior, but doesn’t often engage in combat simply because he doesn’t see a need for it outside of defense. Even then, due to his kind nature, he typically only fights back enough to deter predators, not kill them. However, with Arti being a carnivore, and having LOTS of experience with more complex combat situations than just defense (mostly from scav encounters), I like to think that Arti would give Gourm more combat tips and they may even end up bonding on occasional hunting trips together. And it would circle back to Arti because Gourm, with his cooking skills, would make the resulting meals from their hunts taste SO much better than what Arti is used to, allowing her to slow down and really enjoy food in a way she hasn’t been able to with her warrior lifestyle!

Option 2: Motherhood

This one’s pretty self-explanatory. Given Arti was a mother once, and Gourmand’s story ends with him getting 2 pups, I could easily see him wanting Arti to stay around to act as a mother for them. Not only would that give her the chance to embrace motherhood again, but it would take some pressure from Gourmand because he has a partner (and an experienced one at that) to help him with parenting! I mean, don’t get me wrong, Gourmand is undoubtedly great with pups, but even so it’s good to have some help! Even more so since (depending on what general age you headcanon the pups as) he’d likely have to leave his pups alone while getting food; it’d be nice to have someone with her own experience caring for pups who can look after them during those times and, to add onto the first option, even help teach them how to hunt and survive on their own!

And heck, I personally actually like to imagine that, a little later, after she gets comfortable enough and fully overcomes her grief, Artificer would actually have a second litter with Gourmand (naratively-speaking, this would signify the completion of her character arc)! Of course it’d be a big deal for Arti, but just imagine how much fun Gourm would have exploring the new experience of getting to raise biological pups this time! And I can just see him being so, so thankful that Arti somehow managed to give him even more family to love!

Option 3: Passion

So this one’s the most personal-headcanon-based, and built off my personal depiction of Gourmand as a character. In my headcanon, Gourmand starts out as a rather reluctant leader of his colony. I have this whole idea of what specific event led to him becoming the leader, but to summarize, it seemed like a very sudden chance event at the time, yet from it he was more-or-less unanimously chosen to lead by the other Outer Expanse slugcats due to him having shown great creativity, survival skills, and protectiveness. Gourmand himself, however, doesn’t really feel he’s fit to be a leader; he’s used to an easygoing life just peacefully surviving and doing his own thing, not managing and defending an entire colony! He’s so used to seeing the simple parts of the world that he often underestimates himself, so something as “grand” as leadership often appears too great for him.

That’s where Arti comes in. I like to imagine that Artificer is extremely passionate, but that for a long time after her pups’ deaths, that passion was manifested almost exclusively as immense rage, grief, and desire for revenge against their killers. But imagine if, once she gets comfortable with Gourmand’s colony, she begins to show that passion in positive emotions! Not only would she, after seeing what he’s capable of in hunts, help him see that he IS the perfect leader for his colony, but just IMAGINE: Arti hyping Gourm up as the biggest, strongest warrior in the Expanse, just before the two prepare to take down a king vulture; or Arti patching him up after a really tough battle and assuring him he’ll be even better next time; or Arti teasing Gourm and them chasing each other around as they spar together in the OE fields; or Arti getting all dramatic as she recites tales of her epic scavenger battles to his eager pups; or Arti showering Gourm with kisses after he makes a REALLY good meal with her favorite meats!  There are SO many possibilities for hypeman Arti, and I figure that, once Gourm sees her fiery spirit used in a positive way, especially to help him and his family, he can’t help but fall for her! And this idea is part of why I like the Spicybun ship name so much - while Gourmand helps Arti mellow out, Arti literally spices up his life! They just compliment each other so perfectly!!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

MAN do I love these two so much! This is about all I have right now on this subject, but again, I’d LOVE to hear any other ideas for how Artificer would help Gourmand, or additions to these ideas! I just adore the “opposites attract” ship trope (although I personally prefer to call it “inverses attract”), and I think Artimand is easily one of the best examples of that in Rain World! 

Thank you to anyone who made it to the end of this wall of text! And let me know if I should share any more Rain World headcanons, because I’ve definitely got more!

Oh, and if you've found this, @melissa-titanium, hope you like it again! Let me know if you ever want me to stop @-ing you with these Artimand headcanons, by the way!

[meteor752]

Epic the musical side story where Hades and Persephone get really invested in the story during The underworld saga, sorta small talk about the strange man for the next couple of years, and then freak the fuck out in the audience during god games when they find out not only is the guy still alive, he’s managed to piss off like half the pantheon

Just

“Hey babe?”

“Yeah Perse?”

“There’s like, a bunch of mortals here”

“Mortals? What, how?”

“Idk, they’re like, on some ship”

“Huh. Should I call Thanatos, have him take care of it, or should we just wait it out”

“Call Thanatos, best to rid the garden of any pests before they manage to kill your flowers”

“Pfft, alright. I’ll be right back”

“Okay- wait. A bunch of the dead are singing to him”

“What?”

“Yeah like a bunch. Who are they?”

“Uhh, most of them drowned, a few killed by a cyclops. One broke his neck?”

“They’re singing about a cyclops, about how he let one live or something”

“Probably one of Poseidons. Should I still call Thanatos?”

“No wait, I wanna see where this goes.”

“Alright.”

“An infant, what infant?”

“Maybe the cyclops?”

“OH NEW GUY! He seems important!”

“Also a cyclops victim. They seem close, what do you think friend or lover?”

“They’re Greek, it’s probably both”

“I don’t know how he managed it, but this guy brought down like, the entire vibe of the entire underworld. That shouldn’t be possible”

“Yeah. Oh who’s this lady now?”

“Suicide by drowning. Not sure. Maybe a relative”

“Yeah may-THATS HIS MOM”

“OH MY GODS. OH HE DIDNT KNOW OH LORD”

“Hooooooly fuck, what a way to find out”

““Here in the underworld the past is always close behind”. Think we should make that a slogan?”

“Then we’d have to credit him and stuff tho”

“Yeahhhh. Well, seems like this guy is sticking around for a few hours. Should I grab some popcorn?”

“Yeah I’ll grab the fainting couches”

~~~

“Okay what’s happening now?”

“He just stated speaking to Tiresias”

“Tiresias? He went all the way to the underworld to speak with a prophet?”

“Well he is quite good”

“Wait did Tiresias just reject him?”

“I think so? Oh wait predictions”

“Past romance, sacrifice, betrayal, and some final battle? Who the fuck is this guy?”

“Dunno, but he’s not going home that’s for sure”

“Palace? He must be a king of some kind then”

“Do we know the names of any mortal kings”

“Nope, so that didn’t help at-wait his wife is doing what”

“Ohhh, that must be rough, hearing it from a prophet”

“Okay this chanting is getting intense. I think I heard the word Scylla”

“I heard lightning bolt”

“That doesn’t bode well”

~~~

“He’s just, sitting there”

“Is he done? Should we-oh. No okay new song, let’s see what’s going on”

“Man this guy has it rough. Should we like, do something?”

“I mean, I’m not really the “bless the mortals” type of god. I mean I let a guy borrow my helm once, and I haven’t seen it since. I should probably check up on that actually”

“Yeahhh. They killed a friend of the cyclops?”

“That explains all the cyclops victims”

““Witch turn men to pigs”, you think that’s Circe?”

“Sounds like he-WHAT WAS THAT THIRD ONE”

“You don’t think-?”

““God comes down and makes a fleet drown”, I am most definitely sure!”

“Damn. Wait wooden horse? Oh, I know who this guy is!”

“Really?”

“Yeah he’s one of Athenas warriors! Ody something. Odyssen? Odyssa? Whatever, I remember the horse thing was a big deal when it happened, Ares was pissed, Hermes spread the word to all of mount Olympus”

“One of Athenas eh? Interesting. Oh yeah, the god was definitely Poseidon”

“How are you sure?”

“That line he just sung, “Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves”, Posy is always fucking saying that crap”

“500 men? Damn”

“Penelope, presumably the wife. Don’t know about the other guy tho”

“Either a son, brother, or lover. Or maybe just a friend I dunno”

“Another infant? What the fuck is wrong with this guy, pulling a fucking Hera”

“Gotta appreciate the determination of him”

“Yeah, but I think we’ll see him here again soon. If he’s pissed of Poseidon, and soon to be Zeus if Tiresias is to be believed, I don’t think he’ll get much further when he gets out of here”

“So we are letting him go”

“Yeah. Partly because I want to see what happens next. When he gets here we’ll ask him to tell the full story, from beginning to end”

“Alrighty then”

~~~

“I swear if I get dragged out of the underworld for one of Zeus’ little games one more time this year I might actually start a war”

“Mum keeps staring at me…fuck she’s probably gonna try and talk after this, fuck meeeeee”

“We can escape in the middle of it, no one will know”

“Oh she’ll know. Do you know what this is about like, at all?”

“No, but I think Hermes might launch into the fourth dimension if he keeps vibrating like that in his seat”

“Yeesh”

“Hmm, odd. I don’t see Posy anywhere”

“Maybe he’s competing?”

“Nah, he always declines when Zeus asks, he hates it”

“Why were you not invited?”

“Dunno, probably has nothing to do with me”

“Oh it’s starting, it’s starting”

“Athena’s challenging eh? Interesting”

“Would love to know what any of this is about”

“Mortal lover? Demi-god child? Those are the usual subject”

“Yeah but that’s not Athenas thing. Probably something to do with one of her “warriors” or whatever”

“Apollo, of course. Always has to be apart of these things”

“The drama queen”

“Truly”

“Hephasteus and Aphrodite? That’s a little awkward”

“Weird lineup so far- fucking Ares? Yeah shes not winning this one, sibling spite is stronger than any argument she can give”

“Why would all three of them be included. I can feel the tension from here. I’m uncomfortable”

“And Hera? Yeah no she’s loosing for sure, Hera like not care less about any mortal, unless they’ve offended her”

“She might be convinced, just to spite Zeus?”

“That just sounds unhealthy on so many levels”

“Alright let’s see what this is about”

“Hold up, Ody?”

“Oh my gods. You thinking what I’m thinking?”

“Well he was one of her warriors. Was he not?”

“I can’t believe he’s still trying to get home. It’s been like ten years, how the fuck”

“Well, if he pissed off Poseidon then he probably has something to do with it, the pissy bastard”

“Killed sirens. Why would you do that, so unnecessary”

“Sacrifice??? What the fuck is this man up to????”

“Didn’t we have a few Scylla sacrifices a few years back. Think that was him?”

“Holy shit we did. Yeah, Posy stays away from Scylla to the best of his ability, travelling in her domain to avoid him is not a bad idea”

“‘Phro is mad that his mum died? Girl you are grasping at straws, even more than the previous two”

“Hold up, why the fuck was I not invited?! He traveled through my domain, disturbed my souls, he even woke up Cerberus with his monster wailing, I should be apart of this!”

“I mean it’s a bit weak”

“I have more grounds to be down there than fucking Apollo. Like sirens? Come on man”

“Oh ‘Phro refused huh? Only got two, that’s kinda weak coming from Athena, she usually gets at least four”

“Is that cheating? Her quick thought thing. That cheating?”

“Are there any actual rules?”

“Just, try to win, I guess”

“Oh Ares turn. Wait she lost Aphrodite, this should be over”

“I think this is more of a personal thing. Like I said, sibling spite”

“Oh yeah, Scylla! Fuck this guy is getting around”

“Oh damn, that pissed her off”

“Guessing that the guy other that Penelope, Telemewhatever was his child then”

“Oh wait they yielded?? Huh, never thought that would happen”

“And, Heras turn”

“Yeah like I said she does not give a fuck. But it was a good run”

“Yeah, keeping her four out of five streak”

“Wait what the fuck was that”

“She- she actually yielded?”

“And for not cheating! Man I love this guy, I can’t wait for him to die”

“Only you babe. Wait holy fuck she won?”

“Oh Zeus won’t like- oh, just like I said. He’s pissed”

“Is he gonna kill her?”

“If he does I’ll just resurrect her probably. She deserves a better end, even if she is annoying”

“Well, should we go then?”

“Yeah I have some paperwork to- do I hear boss music?”

“OH SHES STILL ALIVE!!”

“She took a lightning bolt to the face and lived, holy fuck. Gotta respect it”

“I think, she’s actually convincing him? Never thought I’d see the day”

“Well, she’s his favourite child. I think if Ares tried something similar he’d just get struck by another lightning bolt”

“Well, that was fun. When I come back up for spring I’ll have to check with Hermes more about the details of what’s live, actually going on with this Ody dude”

“Yeah. Wanna stop for applebees before we head on down?”

“Yeah, but let’s go now cause mum is heading like right for me and I don’t wanna deal with that until another few months”

This was dumb lol

[starrystevie]

steve who got a lower back tattoo on a drunken dare in his late 20s and forgets it's there most of the time. steve who stretches one night at a party and his shirt rides up exposing the swirling lines that peek out from under his belt line. steve who doesn't think anything of it and forgets to pull his shirt back down as he leans forward on the couch while talking with the group, basking in the welcomed burn of a certain pair of eyes locked on him.

eddie who's sitting next to him, gripping the back of the couch cushion where his arm is slung around his long term crush like it's the only tether he has to planet earth because not only does steve have a tattoo, but it's right there. eddie who takes in a shuddering breath and can't pull his gaze away from the ink that spreads low over tanned skin that he longs to explore. eddie who digs his other hand into his knee to keep it from doing anything stupid like running his fingers over the tattoo or pulling steve up to go to the spare bedroom.

steve who shoots frozen-in-place eddie a knowing smirk after a few seconds as he leans over even further before standing up and holding out his hand in invitation anyway. eddie who finds out later in the night that he doesn't have to wonder what the tattoo feels like under his fingers for much longer.

[fishblings]

Richie doodle page! He is a cane user. To me

[falmerbrook]

It’s interesting that there’s no snow elf structures or ruins left in Skyrim (that we know of or see in the games) besides the Chantry of Auri-El. I can see a few reasons why that might be:

From a Doyalist perspective, the game developers just didn’t add any for whatever reason. Maybe they didn’t even consider it, maybe they didn’t have time, maybe they didn’t want two sets of abandoned elf ruins (alongside the dwemer), etc.

The snow elves used building materials that degraded faster or didn’t last thousands of years. Given the Chantry of Auri-El and the way shrines and arches around it have stood relatively in tact for thousands of years without anyone tending to them makes me doubt this option though.

The Nords/Atmorans destroyed any snow elf structures or settlements. This would be plausible if, like the last option, their structures weren’t very big or permanent, but like with the last option that’s sort of doubtful. Dragons, however, could’ve helped with that.

The Nords/Atmorans converted snow elf structures or used them for their own purposes, and now we just can’t tell they were ever something else. Our one reference for snow elf architecture (the Chantry of Auri-El) is made of stone (either built or carved out of the mountain (the cooler option imo)), and perhaps old snow elf ruins were just used as templates for Nord barrows or cities because of their sturdy build and location. There’s a theory I’ve seen floating around that the College of Winterhold either at one point was a snow elf ruin that was converted into something else, or was built on top of one, due to its similar architecture style to the Chantry of Auri-El. Maybe cities like Windhelm or (the original) Winterhold were built on top of snow elf cities.

Perhaps it’s just a mix of the above. Maybe only their important or significant religious structures were built of stone and the rest of was easier for the Nords/Atmorans to raze and then degrade back into the environment. What wasn’t destroyed was eventually incorporated into the Nord’s society as tombs or cities.

And none of this is in the game because the developers maybe perceived the snow elves as just a prerequisite for the falmer, rather than a group of people with a culture of their own. Or maybe for some behind the scenes reason in the development of the game like I mentioned earlier. Who knows.I have fun speculating about it though

[arachniasbride]

"Cassie gets all the girls!" - Ezekiel Jones, at some point. Probably.

@lgbtqcreators creator bingo ♡ LGBTQ free choice + layout

[steddiehyperfixation]

Footsteps pad down the hallway as Steve and Eddie make their way to their bedroom at an honestly irresponsible hour given that they both have work in the morning. Yawning, talking quietly. They get ready for bed one at a time in their small bathroom, Eddie settling under the covers with a book while Steve finishes brushing his teeth.

There's a smile in Eddie's voice when he speaks, the words muffled to outsiders by the rustling of sheets as Steve climbs into bed. Whatever it is, it makes Steve laugh, which makes Eddie laugh too. They fall in and out of bouts of talking and giggling, the only two people in the world - or at least it must feel that way, alone together at such an absurd time of night, in the familiar comfort and quiet of their shared bed and shared home.

They don't know that their teenage daughter is still awake in the room next door, listening to their laughter floating through their house's thin walls. She smiles to herself in the dark, warmed by the simple and genuine joy in that sound.

They don't know that this is far from the first time she's heard them laughing together in private. They don't know that she's absorbed every smile they've given each other, every kiss and kindness and warm conversation she's ever witnessed them exchange, and with every one she has learned what love looks like. She may make a whole dramatic show of gagging or pulling a face at some of her dads' displays of affection for each other (she is Eddie Munson's daughter after all), but they don't know how much she actually appreciates the fact that her parents are still so happily in love, that after nearly 30 years together they still genuinely enjoy being around each other. Their relationship began long before her and the love they have for each other continues still not because of her or in spite of her but simply alongside the love they have for her in equal measure.

There is so much love in this house, of that she has never had any doubt. She loves her dads, her dads love her, and her dads love each other, and those are facts, fundamental truths that have been shaped into the very foundation of her bones as she's grown up. No argument or mistake or disagreement has ever been - or will ever be - enough to waver that. Even in moments of anger there has always been love, unquestionably. They don't know just how deeply she knows that. They don't know just how much she values that.

Sleepy and sentimental, she thinks of friends she knows who have grown up in broken homes and are drawn to broken relationships, and she feels so incredibly grateful for the happy childhood Steve and Eddie have given her and the example they've set of such a healthy, loving relationship for her to look up to. They don't know that she knows how lucky she is to have them.

One day I'll tell them, she thinks as she rolls over onto her side and lets her body grow heavy with sleep. One day I'll thank them for teaching me what love is.

[suddenly-stickmin]

Reminders of someone you're trying to forget.

Rupert's piece without the blur!

[steddieme]

steve: i'm just saying, everyone's gotta be at least a little bit bisexual

robin: i have never in my life been attracted to a man

steve: never ever?

robin: never ever

steve: ... then why did tommy try to make out with me every time he got drunk?

robin: oh my god, steve!?

steve: he was like the straightest guy ever???

robin: i'm sorry i have to be the one to break this to you, but that guy had the biggest gay boner for you

steve: what? but he had carol?

robin: babe, he was coping so hard

steve: oh... i guess that explains why he offered to suck my dick that one time

robin: WHAT

[banemaus]

my contribution to jeffjack nation

[jollyreginaldrancher]

More realistic Yellowjackets hcs

•Van is squeamish af. She nearly threw up when just talking about Allie's leg in the pilot, and she almost throws up everytime you finally get to pick a movie and you go for a horror thing.

• Shauna would be one of those girls that could never pick what to eat. She would drag you to hell and back before she'd finally just go with one of the same three restaurants she always chooses. Even though she always picks the same she still wants you to suggest every place in town before she reaches a conclusion.

• Nat and Van overshare with each other. If you're with either one of them you will get smug looks from the other.

• Nat and Van also share their porn stash. Van has the decency to hide it but Nat just leaves her magazines on her night stand. You only ever knew she shared them with Van because you saw one of their trades. Nat tucked a folded up mag into the back of her pants. Van hid hers in the bottom of her schoolbag. You cringed so hard when you realised that's what they were doing. Nat stole them during a house party and Van let curiosity get the better of her and long story short they'd been trading them all year until you found out and used the rolled up magazine to beat Natalie over the head with.

• Van absolutely tries to build a house out of breadsticks every time you take her out to a restaurant for dinner.

• She tries to make an igloo out of waffles.

• You're on the team, on Away games and you share a room with Nat. She climbs on the bed and rocks it back and forth making it squeak and makes moaning sounds when you're on the phone with your mom. If Van is there she will join in but she will be blushing the whole time.

• Trying to get closer to Taissa involves being forced to take part in her morning constitutionals. Only her morning constitutionals involve 45 minute morning runs. And her legs are so long you are constantly trailing behind, and with her, everything is a competition so she straight up leaves you in the dust. You've gotten lost in her neighbourhood multiple times when she's left you behind to run ahead.

• Jackie's inviting you to weeknight dinners with her parents and expecting you to sit idly by while they passive aggressively destroy your confidence. She gives you yours back though after dinner when she lets you top her on her frilly bedsheets.

• Jackie makes you leave her house after dinner, get in your car, drive to the house next door, out of sight, then sneak back and climb up to her window to hit it.

• Sitting in a pew in the back of Laura Lee's church, your hand resting on the stretch of wood between you. You scratch your chin and return it absentmindedly only to find her hand is also resting between you...her pinkie is close enough to touch. You breathe heavily as you ghost your finger against it only for her to react by parting her fingers. Not a lot, but just enough to interlink your pinkies. Your heart is thumping so loud you swear the whole congregation is aware of it. You stare forward, your eyes glazed over as the priest chants Κύριε Ελέησον.

• After church one day, you hang back with Laura Lee as your parents all mingle with other members of the church. The two of you climb to the second floor, way in the back, and lie down on one of the pews, head to head. You look up at her, and she looks up at you and smiles. It's the same pious smile she always gives you but this time you swear her gaze fixes on your lips a moment.

Her parents call her over to go home and she sits up abruptly and waves at you as she bounces nervously away.

• Akilah spends most of her free time with family. Her older sister and her husband both work, so she and her mom get saddled with babysitting her nephew a lot. She sits around the house watching tv and doing homework with a baby on her lap most days. She's supposed to put him down but he's sooooo cute she just can't bring herself to.

When he's a little older, you two sneak him his first bit of chocolate. Well, less sneak, more he reaches over and shoves your entire ice cream down his throat at six months. He doesn't get to the cone before Akilah pulls him away but half your scoop is gone with him. Akilah apologises profusely but you just laugh. She offers to buy you another ice cream and you suggest a rain check. Your first date is an ice cream date when she's no longer grounded for letting him have ice cream at six months. He was fine though.

• Mari doesn't have nieces or nephews yet but she has so many cousins and they all get together and play soccer at family get-togethers. She is not the only one in that family who's on a soccer team but she's the only one who's going to nationals so the competition is stiff with all her cousins competing against her to prove they're all just as good. You may not be the best but she starts dragging you to all of these get togethers so the two of you can ratio her entire family together.

She normally wears jumpers and ties her hair up and stuff but her family notices that she dresses in way more form-fitting clothes and lets her hair down when you start coming to these things and ALL make fun of her for it. I'm talking little baby cousins who look up at her and make kissy faces behind your back and you feel a breeze when you turn your head, and hear the thud of a couch cushion hitting a seven year old at full force.

Oh no, her cousin spilled some juice on you now. Guess she has to bring you to her room, alone, and give you something to change into. You hear another Thwack behind your back as she ushers you down this hallway to the back.

A few cousins grin at you both through the window so she rushes to shut the blinds... She's red as fuck at this point. You're in her room and it's the designated coat room so she pushes a big pile of coats off to the side so you can sit down. She rummages through her closet and finds something that's lowkey a little revealing but she realises her whole family will see you in this so she reaches for a turtleneck instead. It's way too hot though so she just grabs a yellowjackets tee and hands you that and pretends to look around her own room while you change.

• She sniffs it when she gets it back.

• Melissa wears her hat backwards so she can be more easily identifiable as a skater. She's the only girl skater in the school but she doesn't get that much shit for it because she's also a jock on the soccer team that's going to nationals.

• She absolutely tries to rizz you up while skating around you.

• She absolutely loses her focus and eats shit while trying to hit on you.

• You give her your number out of pity.

• She writes your number down on her arm and then uses that part of her arm to wipe the sweat off her brow.

• You realise she's not playing dumb for the bit but you give her a shot anyway. You spend a disproportionate amount of time applying bandages on her and talking her off dumb stunts.

• Had there been any flat surfaces in the wilderness she could have used to skate on, she would have been the first to die.

• Gen...fuck it I don't know shit about Gen. Maybe she's a ninja. Yeah.

• latchkey kid with one of those dogs that's small enough to fit in a bag. It's fluffy and smol. She brings it on dates and feeds it breadsticks when her date isn't looking.

• Gen likes to dress that dog up in funky little outfits. Sometimes she matches it. Has a box full of pictures of her dressing her dog up.

• Misty can and will drag you into the equipment room for some alone time at school.

• Still plays doctor. Doesn't realise that the objective is not to heal the patient but to get close to the patient and feel them up. On the upside she has a full nurse costume. Not a sexy nurse costume, an accurate replica of a nurse costume. So accurate she's banned from wearing it at the local free clinic. Because 12 year old Misty tried to wear it to the clinic the way kids wear princess costumes to Disneyland.

• Van and Natalie subscribe to the sniff test. These jeans Nat's wearing were at the bottom of her used clothes pile but it doesn't matter because they passed the sniff test. Can Van pull off wearing that hoodie for a third day in a row? Yes, because it passed the sniff test. Sniff test.

• Van and Nat have burping contests outside Denny's at 3 am.

• Misty goes to sleep at 8pm every night. Even Laura Lee thinks that's way too early and she has a strict self-imposed bedtime at 10:30.

• Jackie's skincare routine takes the better part of the night.

• Shauna makes you sleep on the floor because she kicks in her sleep and it's her bed so...

• Lottie can come up with an excuse for shit at the drop of a hat. Usually it's excuses for why you shouldn't leave her house and why you should stay over. Lately she's been using excuses to get away from you though and it's worrying you. Nevermind she just wanted space to throw you a surprise party. Wholesome ass.