#sodapop curtis dialogue

[ddejavvu]

Doctor's Note - Sodapop Curtis x Reader

summary: you stand soda up, accidentally

contents/warnings: soda is somewhere around 18-19, mentions of his failed relationship w sandy, distrust/miscommunication, angst -> fluff. based on my very painful experience this morning with crippling back pain

send me requests for the outsiders!

Selfishly, sometimes you wonder what it would have been like to date Sodapop before he'd met Sandy. When he was more carefree, when he wasn't glancing at any man you talked to just a second too long. He's not possessive- and even if he is, he doesn't enforce it. But you know he's wary, and you know it's her fault.

Darrel had warned Soda to stay away from girls for a while, to give himself a break. And he had. Two long years later his hiatus was broken when you'd come into the DX fiending for a coke, and when you'd asked, 'Do you know where I could find a soda 'round here?' his eyes had glimmered with opportunity, and he'd pointed proudly to his nametag.

"Right here, ma'am. No caffeine in me but I could keep 'ya up all night if you want me to."

It had been so wildly crass, so insanely audacious that you'd burst out laughing, both from the absurdity of his name and the brashness of his comment. He'd apologized for it, too, twenty minutes into your conversation that lasted an hour.

"I didn't mean what I said earlier. I mean- I don't usually come on strong like that. Couldn't stop myself- prolly got it from my friend Two-Bit, he's always crackin' jokes like that. Hope you didn't think it was greasy."

"I think it was very greasy," You'd laughed, tilting your chin towards the tin of hair grease abandoned at the other end of the counter, "I thought that was the whole point."

"That's my buddy Steve's", Soda had told you, light dancing in his eyes as he readjusted his elbows on the counter to lean further towards you, "He does these real fancy swirls in his hair, and I've been able to do 'em a few times, but mainly I just slick mine back, and half the time I don't even grease it anyways because I'm just bummin' round the house so there's no need. My other friend-"

He was a natural-born talker, and you'd been just as caught up with talking yourself as you were with listening to him. It had taken the reappearance of his aforementioned coworker, Steve, for you to glance at the clock, and realize that you were 40 minutes past the time you should have been back at work from your lunch break.

You're surprised you hadn't scared Sodapop off with your swearing alone, but you'd managed to scribble your number onto his hand before you'd left. You hadn't even remembered to buy a drink, but he'd brought you one when he showed up for your first date.

Now, three weeks later, you're getting ready to show up to his house. This is a big thing: you're meeting his brothers. He's told you so much about them you feel like you know them, and he's also given you your fair share of warnings, too. Darry's too stern sometimes, and it might take a while for him to warm up to you. Ponyboy's an awkward teen, and on top of it, he'd trusted Sandy- they all had. You know you've gotta prove yourself better than her, and you're starting with some sweet perfume and a bundle of flowers for their dining table.

--

"Get your bum ass off the couch and vacuum," Soda's hands shove roughly at Ponyboy's thighs, "She's gonna be here in thirty minutes!"

"Jeez, Soda, she's not my girlfriend," Ponyboy grumbles, but he stands and heads for the closet where the vacuum lies all the same, "Don't understand why I have to be the one cleanin'."

"'Cause Darry's the one cookin'." Soda glares at him, "And I'm cleaning too. I've been cleaning for days."

"Bathroom looks good, little man." Darry voices his approval from the kitchen, "Thought I was gonna die of shock when I realized you'd scrubbed down the toilet."

Not much conversation is heard over Ponyboy's aggressive vacuuming, but Soda calls the cleaning at five minutes to your arrival time.

"Okay. Rules again?" He looks expectantly at his brothers, and Darry looks irritated that he's being grilled this time.

"No judging." Ponyboy grumbles, but he doesn't think it's fair, because Sandy had seemed so nice and sweet, and she'd run right out on Sodapop. So he feels like he has to judge, because maybe Soda's gonna get hurt again. He doesn't want that.

"No grilling." Darry continues, equally put-out by Soda's request. He wants what's best for his brother. Sodapop's two-year long relationship drought was refreshing, and he's seen the boy blossom into a wonderful man. Still, he can't help feeling some lingering resentment towards Sandy, and he knows it's not fair to attach it to you, but he doesn't know what else to do with it.

"And no arguing at the table." He glances between Darry and Pony both warily, "I mean it, this isn't the night to discuss grades or curfew or chores. Just- be nice to her. Treat her like a real guest."

"Alright, little buddy." Darry secedes, squeezing Soda's flannel-clad shoulder slightly, "Now, you gonna go wait by the door for her?"

"No! I'm not that desperate." Soda scoffs, but Darry notices the way he flops down into his eldest brother's armchair, the only seat in the house with a view of the front walkway. Ponyboy settles himself awkwardly on the couch, watching cartoons even though there's an anxious tension in his skinny shoulders.

You're set to arrive in two minutes, and Soda's practically vibrating out of his seat. There's no sign of the cute little sundress you said you'd wear today, but that's okay, because he thinks it's so considerate of you to show up punctually versus early. if you'd come fifteen minutes earlier you would have seen him near-tears over the spot of chocolate that wouldn't rub out of the wall behind the television. Ponyboy had pointed out that there's no way you would have seen it unless you'd been wedged between their tv and the wall, but Soda was not going to invite you into a messy home.

One minute goes by, and Soda's cuticles hurt from where his nails tear at them. He tries to stop himself- after all, you wouldn't want to hold his hand if his was bleeding. But his next nervous habit becomes fiddling with the hem of his shirt, which isn't nearly as satisfying for his fingers.

He waits for what he's sure is more than a minute, which means you're due to flounce up the stairs in seconds. But he doesn't see you, and he knows Pony's watching him crane his neck every three seconds to look for you. So he tones it down- after all, he's got a 10-minute grace period at the DX for his shifts. If he can clock in at 8:10 and still be 'on time', you can show up a few minutes late.

"Any sign of her?" Darry pokes his head out of the kitchen, seeing the front door still shut. Soda shakes his head- then he catches a glimpse of your hair color outside the window. Upon further inspection, it's a stray cat. Ponyboy snorts at him, and Soda sinks back into the recliner.

Okay, so you've used up your grace period. But Soda gets it- you probably sang one too many love songs about him in the shower, and now you're tripping over your own feet trying to run to his house. Or the bus was late, or you missed it entirely, and you'll show up before the food goes cold.

Fifteen minutes go by, and Darry hovers over the finished meal, wondering whether he should plate it or not.

Twenty minutes go by, and Darry considers removing one plate from the table.

Thirty minutes go by, and Darry turns off the stove.

An hour goes by, and Pony retreats to his room for some homework time. Darry's meticulously cleaning the kitchen, but Sodapop thinks it's more because he doesn't know what to say than because he thinks you'll judge them for a grease stain on the wall.

When Darry's scrubbed the kitchen raw nearly an hour later, he pads softly over to Soda where he still rests in his armchair.

"Soda, I- listen, I don't think she's comin' tonight."

"I told her today." Soda's got his fingernail pinched between his teeth, his leg having long-since stopped its nervous bouncing, "I- I know I told her tonight, and she said she'd be here, but I-"

Darry's hand squeezes his shoulder again, this time tighter, and something awfully familiar resurges in Soda's chest where it's laid dormant for two years.

"C'mon, little buddy." Darry urges him up out of the chair, "Let's turn in early tonight."

--

Soda's not doing his best work despite having gotten eleven hours of sleep the night prior. He's sluggish and mopey, and Steve sticks him on the register so that no one risks a foolish mistake to their car. Soda stares at a knot in the wood grain, chewing on the inside of his cheek, and doesn't look up even when the entrance bell dings.

"Soda-" He hears a voice, one that he'd been waiting since last evening to hear, one that exacerbates that sickly feeling in his chest. He hasn't been able to shake it, and your face had blended with Sandy's in his nightmares last night.

"Soda, I'm- I'm so sorry."

"Why didn't you show?" He barely has the courage to look up at you, but he does, because last time he'd groveled. He'd begged, pleaded, bargained with her to stay with him, and he wasn't going to do that this time. He was going to be the man Darry wanted him to be.

"I'm sorry." You repeat, clutching a paper in your hands, brows permanently furrowed, "It was an emergency. I was getting ready, and- and all of a sudden my back started hurtin'. Real bad, Soda, I- I had to lie down on the ground."

Soda watches, interest piqued, as you stagger towards the counter, clearly limping. Sickness is replaced with worry in his chest, and he watches as you brace yourself against the register.

"My folks didn't get home for hours. I was just laying there, I- I couldn't reach the phone, I couldn't move my legs, I was just stranded there." Your voice thickens at the memory, and you sniffle absentmindedly, "Soda, I would have called you, I just- I couldn't move. I swear. I tried, Soda, I swear I tried to get to the phone, but it was so painful. And then when my parents got home they had to carry me to the car 'n all, and the emergency room took forever, and- and we didn't get home until three in the morning, and I knew you'd be sleepin' so I didn't call, and I felt so bad because I knew you'd be waiting on me, and- and I'm so sorry, Sodapop."

All at once yours and Sandy's faces come undone in his mind, and hers is cast aside as he studies yours. There's tears, big shiny ones lining your eyes, and your chin trembles slightly. You're still clutching the paper, and when you realize he's glancing at it, you gasp.

"Oh! I- um, I got you a doctor's note. I didn't want you to think I was lyin'."

You push the page towards him on the counter, and he takes it with trembling hands.

'Patient Y/N Y/L/N admitted to emergency services at 8:49 PM Wednesday, 30th July. Diagnosed with severe lumbar muscle strain. This patient is placed off of work from 7/30/1968 through 8/05/1968.

Patient would like to add that she did not intend to stand up her date with one Sodapop Patrick Curtis on Wednesday, 30th July. Patient would like to reschedule for another night. Doctor prescribes a calm, laid-back dinner date until patient recovers.'

"Had one hell of a time trying to get him to put that in there." Your sheepish voice pipes up from where Soda's reading the last words on the page, "But I told him you were a nice boy and he said there's not many of those around here. I'm sorry, again. I'm so sorry."

Lumbar muscle strain rings a bell in Soda's head. It's something Darry's definitely mentioned before, the few times they've bullied him into seeking medical attention for all of his blue collar aches and pains. He's sure if you're hurting the way Darry does sometimes, that you weren't lying about not being able to move.

You're staring at him like you're worried he'll send you away, and the piece of paper in his hands is the only thing stopping him from doing just that. But he glances down at it again, and takes a deep breath.

"It's okay. I believe you. My brother Darry, he- he pulls muscles sometimes. Don't usually see him cry, but I do when that happens. Are you okay?'

You visibly relax at his words, but something in your back must have protested the movement, because your face pinches up again.

"Um- yeah. Mostly. It hurts when I move too much." You admit, "But I had to make it down here to see you. I'm so sorry. Were you- were you angry at me?"

He doesn't think so- he was offended, he was disappointed, but most of all, he's pretty sure he was beating up on himself more than he was beating up on you. It felt like it did the first time, and he was the common denominator in both.

"No." He answers honestly, "But- uh, I think Darry probably is."

You wince, and he doesn't blame you. But he holds the note a little tighter, "But I'll tell him what happened. Like I said, he knows what that feels like. Don't worry about it, honey. You- uh, did you want to still meet them?"

"Of course! Of course," You nod eagerly, bracing your weight against the counter, "Do you still... want me to meet them?"

"Of course." He echoes, finally breaking his stoicism with a grin, a shy one as he reaches for your hand over the counter, still clutching the note in his other hand, "Can't argue with the doctor's orders."

[dallasgallant]

“Oh-ho. Mornin’ Mister Universe”

“Close the door!”

[2knightt]

CANT HOLD IT IN ANY LONGER!!! i’m utterly obsessed with the curtis brothers.

idk if u do this, but if u can, the curtis brothers with a reader who’s super down bad for them? they make it so clear, too. constantly doing everything for them, making food, buying snacks, just utterly everything. compliments, holding their hand religiously … yk.

୧ ׅ𖥔 ۫ you know i’m a fool for you. ⋄ 𓍯

…IN WHICH! you think the curtis brothers are the only men on the planet.

tags/warnings: swearing(on my end/once during dialogue.) reader being slightly overprotective or insane, mentions of reader getting hit on, mentions of reader leaving lip stick stains, me not knowing what to write for darry.

ೃauthor notes⁀➷ i’m using ny other accounts layout bc i can’t be bothered rn. also i’m here to feed y’all i’ve noticed the outsiders x reader tag is lowkey dry asl.

Ponyboy Curtis:

WOAH HE CAN’T HANDLE ALLAT😭

like actually. he is TWEAKING AT ALL TIMES! when you first like started complimenting him, showering him in kisses, giggling n’ shit—he thought it was a one time thing.

ponyboy just thought he’d have to thug that shit out once a week or something. he was, in-fact, pleasantly surprised when you continued to do it.

“you’re so-mwah-cute! i wish-mwah-i could-mwah-hold you forever!”

“y/n…😣”

he’s so flustered omfg like actually he’s beet red LMFAOOO. if you were to put your fingers to his forehead it’d be so hot. like ponyboy’s avoiding eye contact, his lips are tightened, etc.

if he were to stay the night at your place—you make him all types of food. like, food he’d never heard of. or food he’d dream about after eating bologna for a week,

“for me? …really?”

“mhm! c’mon, don’t let it get cold now.”

ponyboy is DIGGING RIGHT THE FUCK IN. okay he is SCARFING THAT DOWN. after he’d be a little embarrassed of how quickly he ate but like you just took it as a good thing.

thinks you’re the best cook ever tbh. gordan ramsey has nothing on you type levels.

going on a walk with him to go grocery shopping for the curtis house with your hands intertwined and letting ponyboy ramble about this annoying substitute he had!!! IT’S REAL!!! ALL OF IT!!!

“n’ then he tried to tell me my answer was wrong when i studied last night—I EVEN ASKED MY FRIENDS. so, i know it was right. i just think mr. johnson had a personal vendetta against me.”

“smh…i could do slash his tires if you’d like♡!”

“what”

“nothing.”

AWHHH PONYBOY FOLLOWING YOU AROUND THE STORE LIKE A LOST PUPPY BECAUSE HE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT TO BUY LMFAO

he’d like holding your sleeve or the hem of your shirt as you walk around, looking more awkward above all else.

uwahh showering ponyboy in compliments late at night when it’s just the two of you, twirling his hair as you hold him closer!!!

“you’re hair is so pretty. it’s so soft…i dunno why you put grease in it. if i was you—i’d never let anyone touch it.”

“i don’t. i only let you.”

“…REALLY??🥰🥰😚😚”

ur friends are soooo sick of you talking about ponyboy LMFAOOOO like actually. every time you go, ‘omfg did i tell you guys, he-‘ they know to just let you mindlessly ramble.

“and then ponyboy read to me ‘til i fell asleep! he’s so sweet—i dunno how he’s real!”

“i dunno how you’re so whipped.”

“he must be the funniest motherfucker on the planet if y/n’s this obsessed.”

Sodapop Curtis

OHHH Y’ALL ARE AT A CONSTANT WAR TO SEE WHO’S GONNA BEAT THE OTHER AT BEING THE BETTER PARTNER LMFAOOO

HE’S usually the whipped one in the relationship…he felt both extremely lucky and threatened when you started attacking him with kisses…

“you’re so handsome. i’m just the luckiest person on earth—ain’t i?”

“…yeah…🤨”

“why’d you say it like that?😞”

“cause I’M the luckiest person on the earth…I’M supposed to be tellin’ you this…”

but as time goes on—he does take the loss and accepts you’re better at him. for now. it’s only a matter of seconds until sodapop thinks of something insane to show his love for you.

anyways! IMAGINE COOKING WITH HIM OHHHH NY GODDDDD /?:&$:&: he just mainly stands there and looks pretty as he asks what you’re doing but SHHH. HE’S MORAL SUPPORT.

“…what?”

“i’m chopping onions for the flavour, honey.”

“you don’t like onions, though?”

“i don’t like the crunch rather than the flavou—YOU REMEMBERED I DON’T LIKE ONIONS??☹️☹️”

“of course i would!”

gladly holds ur hand 24/7. i’m not kidding. you two are like super magnets. HEHEHE IMAGINE HIM DRIVING WITH ONE HAND ON THE WHEEL AND HIS OTHER HAND HOLDING YOURS!!/!2!

you do take him grocery shopping. only sometimes, though. he only buys junk food rather than actual food.

“can i get these? please?”

“you already have two bags of chips in the cart, soda.”

“okay..😣”

“SIGH…get them.”

“HURRAY!”

knows you can’t say no to him and that’s like the only time he uses it to his advantage.

soc’s do hit on you under the premise of ‘showing you how a real man is supposed to spoil a lady like you.’ HOWEVER, you look at them like they’re aliens.

“hey, baby. what’re you doin’ around here?”

“…EW.”

“???”

they’re shocked above all else as they see you turn away from them and quickly walk away without looking back. AND WOOO SODA IS SO PROUD.

Darry Curtis

the gang acts like you two are constantly fighting whenever you start to look at darry with that sparkle in your eyes.

“guys, PLEASE! YOU’RE BREAKING UP THE FAMILY! STOP ARGUING!”

“what the hell are you on about, soda?”

“you’re scaring pony!” “don’t bring me into this.”

“mind you’re own business, soda.”

AJDIEHJR DARRY HAVING A HAND AROUND YOUR WAIST AS YOU MUTTER SWEET NOTHINGS BETWEEN KISSINGS>>>

you two are a POWER COUPLE IN THE GROCERY STORE! EVEN IF YOU REFUSE TO LET HIM PAY AND HE GETS POUTTY! EVEN IF HE DOESN’T TAKE COMPLIMENTS WELL!

“y/n, please. these are for my house.”

“so?? my wallet was out first.”

“that doesn’t mean anything. baby, i’m telling you, i’m paying.”

“too late, i already handed the cashier the money.”

you cook and clean for the curtis’ to take something off of darry’s back out of the kindness in your heart and totally not because you want him to pay more attention to you!! NEVER!!

but you do enjoy the fact that darry has more time to sit down and pay attention to you! and darry really likes the extra time he has!!

“you didn’t have to.”

“yes i did! you’ve been so stressed out, it’s the least i could do for you.”

“you’re such a treat, y’know.”

“mh. only f’you.”

you FORCE him to hold your hand. sometimes he forgets that he’s supposed to hold your hand in public so do NOT BE AFRAID TO GRAB IT YOURSELF.

but once you do, darry is the last person to let go. maybe to wrap an arm around your hip—BUT THAT’S IT.

teehee leaving lipstick stains on his white t-shirt accidentally🫶🫶!! it’s all so real to me!! sure, darry’s a little annoyed but it’s okay! he can never be mad at you!

[alittlebitofloveliness]

“I feel like I know Soda from the way you talk about him”  -Cherry Valance

Me: I should work on one of the half dozen fic prompts sitting in my asks

My Brain: Ok but what if INSTEAD of that you fixated on a throwaway line of dialogue and write a Sodapop character study through the eyes of Cherry Valance

Me: Ok bet

**************************

“I feel like I know Soda from the way you talk about him”  -Cherry Valance, The Outsiders

The bell over the door jingles merrily as she steps through the door, though it’s the only thing that could be considered merry in the DX gas station today. Inside the air is suffocating. A dark haired greaser covered in oil gives her a cold once over, jaw tightening, but doesn’t say anything, just goes back to sweeping as she pretends to browse the candy bars. 

She shouldn’t be here. She knows she shouldn’t, and it’s not like she isn’t busy enough what with talking to Randy and trying to help Mrs. Sheldon plan the funeral.

The funeral. Bob’s funeral. Sweet, funny, stupid, reckless Bob. Her boyfriend. Her boyfriend who’d been stabbed, who’d bled out in a park on the east side. Her boyfriend who’d scared a sweet kid into doing it. Her boyfriend who’d beat said kid within an inch of his life three months ago, around the same time he’d been coming by after school to help her take care of her mom. 

God this is so fucked up. She owes Bob’s memory more loyalty than this. She owes those kids something too.

She turns to go, pausing when she catches sight of the boy behind the counter. She’d seen him around school for a while, and he’d pumped her gas a few times, but until Friday night she hadn’t really known much about him. His hair is more blond than red, eyes brown instead of green, and his face has a few sharper angles, but other than that he looks a whole lot like his little brother. Even if Ponyboy hadn’t described him perfectly, after meeting him she could have guessed they were related. 

She swallows heavily, cowardly once again, and feigns interest in the chips this time. The dark haired guy keeps alternating between glaring at her and casting worried glances at where Sodapop Curtis sits slumped behind the counter. She kind of gets why. Handsome as Sodapop is, he looks terrible- eyes red rimmed and gaze vacant as he stares down at the counter with such a forlorn expression Cherry’s heart breaks just looking at it. He looks like a scene is straight out of a sad movie, the kind where the hero is doomed from the start, no matter what they say or do. The kind where they lose everything over and over and end up alone. The kind Cherry used to like before she learned that real tragedy wasn’t as beautiful as it looked on TV. The kind Bob never watched with her anyway, always talking her into watching a comedy or an action film instead.

It’s been three days. Three days since Bob died, which means Sodapop Curtis’ little brother has been missing just as long. She remembers the pure adoration in Ponyboy’s voice when he talked about him, remembers the way he didn’t have a single bad word to say, how she could almost feel how much Soda loved him just from the way he talked, and her stomach clenches. If Sodapop Curtis loves Ponyboy half as much as Ponyboy clearly loves him, this must be killing him. 

Bob’s life is gone, snuffed out, ruined, but maybe he’d ruined a lot of lives too. The proof is right in front of her.

A well of shame that is rapidly becoming familiar swells in her chest. It was wrong of her to come here, wrong of her to want to talk to him. Even if he doesn’t know who she is, it is wrong for her to bear witness to his pain when it was her boyfriend and her friends who started this whole mess. Bob had died for it, yes, but how many others are going to have to suffer for his mistakes? How many innocents are going to be collateral damage?

Even Johnny Cade. Even the boy who’d killed him, had only done it because he had to. Even he didn’t deserve to suffer.

She should leave. She’s been standing here too long already, and the dark haired guy is becoming impatient, his glare more pronounced. Sodapop Curtis isn’t in the right state to notice her staring, but it’s clear his buddy has and doesn’t seem to appreciate it.

Of course. This whole mess started with a soc girl like her talking to a greaser, and after Bob’s death tensions are running high. No wonder this boy is looking at her like a threat. She’s already messed with the Curtis’ brothers lives enough. Of course, this guy doesn’t know that, but the pure hatred in his dark gaze makes her feel as though he does.

She picks up a stick of bubblegum. 

Glancing up through her lashes she watches as Sodapop raises a hand to chew absently on his left thumbnail. 

Her mind flashes back to the movie house, an auburn haired kid sitting beside her, deep into the movie, biting his left thumbnail, seemingly unaware he was doing it.

It’s this memory, the memory of Ponyboy biting his thumb mirrored exactly in his older brother that finally makes her decision for her. 

She grabs a few candy bars at random and a bag of chips for good measure, and makes her way over to the cash.

Sodapop Curtis doesn’t notice her presence until she’s directly in front of him, and even then only once she’s dropped her items on the counter. Gold brown eyes blink up at her suddenly, and she tries not to gasp.

The force of his full attention is not what shocks her- although a face like that is hard to not be stunned by. No, instead it's the absolute tortured look in his eyes that forces her to pause.

Desperation is something you hear about but don’t understand until you really see it in its wild, crazed, bruising true form, Cherry is realizing now. She’s never seen someone so physically present who so obviously isn’t here.

That is, until his gaze sharpens, recognition breaking through the haze of despair.

“You’re that socs girlfriend,” he says. It’s not a question. It’s also not an accusation, but it’s something close, “the one who died. I saw you. In the paper.”

“Yes.” She agrees softly. The dark haired guy has stopped pretending to sweep and is watching his friend with a wary gaze, like he could snap at any moment. He certainly looks like he could, hands nearly crushing the candy bars as he starts to ring her up. 

“You shouldn’t be here,” suddenly he seems dangerous, a far cry from the tortured boy from a minute ago, miles from the happy go lucky big brother Ponyboy had described at the drive in. She’d told Ponyboy she felt like she knew Soda from the way he described him, but she couldn’t have been more wrong. She doesn’t know the boy in front of her, whose jaw is clenched so tight his teeth creak, and whose eyes show such a deep well of hate she can feel herself drowning in it, “none of your kind should be, but especially not you. Your boyfriend is the reason my kid brother is missing.”

She can’t help but flinch.

He is none of the things Ponyboy told her about him, is not happy go lucky or grinning, doesn’t look like a guy who is gentle with horses, and teases people lovingly, or someone who helped hold his family together and looks out for his buddies. He isn’t who he is supposed to be, and he’s right- it’s Bob’s fault. It’s Bob’s fault Ponyboy is missing, Bob’s fault half of Soda’s already fractured family has been ripped away from him, Bob’s fault he doesn’t know where his fourteen year old brother is trying to fend for himself.

And yet… Bob’s sins are not her own. She won’t pretend she had no role in this whole mess, but Bob’s choices are not her own. She has her own issues to atone for, but it is not her job to answer for Bob’s.

She squares her shoulders. 

“I’m sorry about what happened,” Sodapop stiffens immediately, but she ploughs on, “truly I am, and if the police ask me I will tell them it was self defense because I know,” her voice catches, but she forces back the tears. She loves Bob, she does, but he could be cruel and she owes it to those kids to tell the truth, “I know Bob started it, but I didn’t do this and I won’t be treated like I did.”

His dark eyes flash, and for a or a second she thinks he might actually hit her-  then his shoulders slump, all the fight draining out of him to be replaced once again with anguish.

“I-” he can’t seem to bring himself to apologize. Cherry can’t really blame him, “ok.”

He finishes ringing up her items, and she pays, taking the bag of candy she doesn’t want or need and trying to think of a reason to stall. She considers asking about Ponyboy, considers telling Soda about meeting him at the drive in, wonders if he did know anything if he’d actually tell her and concludes that he wouldn’t. Of course he wouldn’t. The girlfriend of the guy his brother skipped town after seeing murdered is probably the last person he’d trust with any news. 

Even still. She can’t bring herself to leave without saying anything. 

“I really hope you find your brother,” she settles on, hoping he can read her sincerity, “Ponyboy is a really special kid.”

The bell rings again as the door closes behind her, but the melancholy mood follows her to her car.

She was wrong on Friday. She doesn’t know anything about Ponyboy’s brother, no matter how well he described him.

Then again, she thinks as she drives away, catching sight of the golden haired boy once again staring vacantly at the counter through the window, maybe the boy she just met wasn’t Ponyboy’s brother Sodapop. Maybe he’s the Sodapop who isn’t.

She thinks of the boy made of sunshine Ponyboy described compared to the tortured prince of darkness she just met, and shudders.

What a terrible thought.

[throwing-in-the-towel]

I know you’ve talked about how you aren’t a fan of the La Jolla production so I find it so funny when I see a teenager on TikTok post audio or something that is not in the production now complaining about why did the remove this? 😭 and I just have to laugh and say to myself because they made the show better for Broadway 🤣

LOLOLOLOLOL

i think most of the people saying that also just want the musical to be like 5 hours long,,,which me too! if it was a perfect world and i could get anything i wanted, i would make the show 24 hours long! a lot of these people also are newer to musical theater/broadway so i don't think some of them fully grasp why/how things are cut from shows!

i'll say it again, i think the show was very weak in la jolla (script wise) and they made it a lot better for broadway. there was too much explaining every. little. thing. in the la jolla version for me. for example, the cut dialogue of soda talking about sandy was horrible and i'm so glad they cut it. the way it's written is just so, disney channel? if that makes sense? what i mean by that is, it feels like they're just really spelling everything out for the audience. i know media literacy is dead but like, come on LOL

even when the socs jump johnny and pony and johnny literally says, "he's darrel curtis' brother so you better watch it!" then goes on to say "he's sodapop curtis' brother too!" like...idk. it's so clunky to me. the casual introductions of characters and implications of things in scenes in the broadway version makes it a much much much stronger show. sorry for the rant LOL i could go on about this for hours

[evita-shelby]

20 questions for fic writers

Thanks for the tag @emotionalcadaver and @darklydeliciousdesires !!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

38 and counting , might make it 39 when i get around to uploading Seeds on there

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

750,325

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mainly Peaky Blinders, House of the Dragon and Masters of the Air, have written for the Inuyasha Fandom, one fic for Black Panther, game of thrones/a song of ice and fire, the Avatar cartoon series, wrote a one shot series for republic commando before i found out the writer is the jk rowling of star wars, tried a batman fanfic one time, did a one shot for pride and prejudice, did a saltburn crackfic and removed from hiatus a Silmarillion and Rings of Power fic

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

Someone will remember us :1261

Between the shadow and the soul: 623

All is bliss (in the court of aemma the great):368

You read me poetry while i wash the dishes: 229

Nothing more difficult than love: 222

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes, will take between 5 seconds or 5 days lol

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The Knife, a one shot/epilogue for Incantatrice where Eva plans her and Luca's murder suicide after the events of the fic

7. What’s a fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Completed on ao3, Misao of the Fire Nation where Misao and Iroh just elope instead of having the wedding their families wanted. Happiest because the fic itself was pretty low stakes

Between the shadow and the soul is a close second because it ends with Eva arriving in Veracruz with her exile finally over and the series as well. And its a good pay off after a lifetime of drama

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Yep

9. Do you write smut?

When the stars and planets align

10. Craziest crossover?

I once tried an x men/starwars/tranformers crossiver when i was 15, it was bad, i deleted it. That year i also did an inuyasha/lord of the rongs crossover

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Also no.

14. All time favorite ship?

Elizabeth Bennett/Fitzwilliam Darcy

My favorite oc x cc ship?

Eva x Jack Nelson followed by Aemma Velaryon x Aemond Targaryen

15. What’s a fic you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

My namor x Eva fic, unless Tenoch Huerta comes back in something in costume i can't erase the thought that he look like my tio in monarchas

16. What are your writing strengths?

Character building!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Grammer! Descriptions!

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Depends. Like i have written a fic where the dialogue is entirely in spanish and then made a seperate fic with it English because i was not gonna put translations in the og fic.

I think if it doesn't detract from the story, it should be fine, and your story should be fine if the readers skip it.(i do when its a language i can't speak or read)

19. First fandom you wrote in?

*sophia petrillo voice*: picture this, a bored eighth grader discovers quotev in keyboarding class after reading the outsiders and seen Patrick Swayze as Darry Curtis. It was actually a Sodapop Curtis x oc fic for a friend because they thought he was the hotter brother.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Shock and Delight, the hotd bridgerton inspired aemma x aemond fic

[themarauderstheoutsidersandpeggy]

☃ Hi! Huge fan! Your work is amazing! I was wondering if you could do a soulmate au for sodapop curtis? Thank you!

Happy Holidays! Please enjoy my winter celebration <3

⛄ in the meadow we can build a snowman - pick a character and an au and I’ll write a scenario around it! (ex. barista au)

Hi sweetheart, thank you so much! for this au, I used "- A touch from your soulmate will leave an imprint there (like a different coloured area on your skin, or a symbol, or name)" from this masterpost of aus. I know that hot chocolate was probably a lot cheaper in literally the 1960′s but i don’t feel like figuring out the difference so you get the prices in modern times sorry 

--

You were barely able to take a breath before the next customer stepped up to the counter, your apron coming undone around your uniform after a long shift.

“Hello, how may I help you today?” You were thankful that the polite greeting was second nature by now, because your brain shut off the second it processed who was standing in front of the counter. 

You couldn’t deny that Sodapop Curtis was dreamy. As much as you wanted to ignore the way your cheeks heated up or the way that you fumbled mindlessly with the hem of your apron behind the counter, there was no denying it. He had you wrapped around his finger, and he hadn’t even spoken yet.

“Hi there, can I get a medium hot chocolate please?”

You nodded softly, grabbing a cup and realizing that, although you already knew his name, you’d seem relatively creepy if you demonstrated this fact. You decided to play it safe, glancing up at him as you spoke.

“Of course. And your name?”

“Sodapop.”

No matter how hard you bit your lip, the soft grin that spread on your face at his voice couldn’t be stopped. You tried ducking your head further down to hide it, finishing your scrawling on the cup and setting it aside.

You rang up his order on the cash register, deducting a dollar that you slipped out of your apron pocket. It definitely couldn’t hurt to reduce the price of his drink.

“That’ll be $2.65.”

Sodapop handed you a $5 from across the counter, and you watched in mixed fascination and disbelief as your finger brushed against his hand when you took the bill, a soft patch of purple spreading over the point of contact.

“Did that just-”

“I think- woah.”

You were frozen in place, and Sodapop slowly reached out to brush his finger against the back of your hand. Once again, a soft purple hue spread over your hand, a similar shade on the pad of his finger. 

You could tell that some of the people behind him in line were getting impatient, but the only thing that mattered at that moment was him. You once again tried and failed to conceal your smile, tentatively making eye contact with Sodapop. 

His tone was incredulous as he spoke, “Okay, make that two hot chocolates then. I don’t suppose you’d want to take a break and step outside with me, Y/N?” You watched as he gently gestured to the nametag pinned to your askew apron, marveling at how your name somehow sounded better when it came from his mouth.

You looked past him out the window at the slush left over from last night’s snowfall, nodding eagerly, “I’d love to.”

Taglist: @spideyyypeter @the-outsiders-fandom @book-wyrm-snacks @nevergoinoutastyle2876 @huffle-homie24601 @ilostcount-helpme @dallyvally @lostnliterature @darrybutgay @stradling_izzy_stradlin @deathofthethrones @not-jay-cosby @writing-red @snoploop @johnnycadeissocute @all-thegayships @briisasinamonroll @bonjouritsellaa @lady-of-lies @ardentmuse @blueivysuniverse @dark-night-sky99 @ilovetvshowsblog @s0cial-retard @savethehoneeybees @luna-xxxxx @bvmakk @deathofthethrones @humblemei @trying-to-live-my-life21 @broken-and-alone12 @fandomnerdsarecool

[nwmlight]

*Soda and Steve skipping stones on a lake*

Soda: It’s such a beautiful evening.

Steve: Take that you fuckin’ lake!

[dallaswinstonsleatherjacket]

Dialogue Prompts-Outsiders Editon:

Send me a ship and a number:

1. “I’ve heard about you. Dallas Winston, right?”

2. “I hate how it’s silent when you’re not around”

3. “Sleep here, please. Don’t stay out in the lot.”

4. “Did they touch you?”

5. “Cuddle?”

6. “Here, take my jacket.”

7. “Dont be afraid, I’m right here.”

8. “Hey, you can talk to me, okay?”

9. “You’re not broken”

10. “You don’t have to do this alone.”

11. “Stay calm, deep breaths, okay?”

12. “You’re safe now. I got you”

13. “Do you know what it’s like? Huh?”

14. “Why do you love someone like me?”

15. “Please just hold me”

16. “Don’t hurt him! Please, don’t hurt him”

17. “You’ll never know what it’s like”

[semicloudy-cade]

25 Dialogue Prompts!

Send me a number and a character or ship! If you want to be more specific send me a little detail like “fluff” or “play fight”.

1. (For the wizards out there) “Scared, (characters name)?”

2. “Let’s not-” “Lets yes!”

3. “Are you wearing makeup?”

4. “Hold my (request an object).”

5. Sarcastically “just a normal day.”

6. “Ignorant ass!”

7. “I love your dimples.”

8. “I love your freckles.”

9. “I will stab you.”

10. “Nice to meet you, I’m you’re future husband/wife/spouse.”

11. “Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can seem myself in your pants.”

12. “I shaved my legs for this!”

13. “Did he/she/it hit you?”

14. “You were jumped?”

15. “Will you help me with this problem?” (School based, doesn’t matter if the character is actually in school or not)

16. Modern! “I follow your tumblr!”

17. Wiccan/Witchcraft based “you won’t turn me into a frog right?”

18. “Smoking is bad for you, ya know.”

19. “She/he/it has got spunk!”

20. Ironically “yeah, super tuff.”

21. “Ready to rumble?”

22. “If you think I won’t eat all of this you’re wrong.”

23. “You seriously just got out of jail, man.”

24. “How in the hell did you break your arm?”

25. “I’ve never seen you in a dress before…”

-feel free to repost and get request of your own-

[eliniei]

Dialogue request!! “What is so wrong with me?” and “I can only blame myself.” Have fun :)

@sixties-sodapop​, I think this ones yours. It was pretty tough, but I think I had a decent idea. 

Masterlist: here

Warnings: maybe a curse

----

The first time Dallas Winston went to jail after he’d moved to Tulsa, Darrel Curtis Sr. had been there to bail him out. He was the first person the kid had called since he couldn’t rely on his own father to do shit for him.

When he pulled into a parking spot at the police station, he sat in his car for a few minutes before going inside. He’d tried to help this boy- who was so like him when he was that age. Wild, mouthy, a real punk. He’d really tried to help Dally calm his urges and violent tendencies.

Obviously. it wasn’t working. Obviously, he was doing something wrong. His own sons were nowhere near this bad- but then again, Winston wasn’t his actual kid no matter how much they pretended. He’d grown up on the rough streets of New York- a place he never should have had to experience at such a young age.

With a sigh, Darrel went inside to pay the fine, and all but dragged his pseudo-son out of the building by the ear.

“Thanks, Mr. C.,” Dally said, rather meekly, after he’d dropped himself into the passenger seat of the car. He slammed the door closed. The older man slid into his own seat and started the engine.

The drive back to the Curtis house started out silent. Dallas looked upset- mad, even, but Darrel had no idea where to start. He wanted to yell, he wanted to console. He wanted to express his disappointment, but he also wanted to encourage this boy to do better from now on.

Fuck, being a parent was hard.

Finally, Dally spoke up.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Curtis,” he mumbled, barely audible. Darrel chewed on the inside of his mouth for a few moments.

“I can only blame myself, I think.”

“How could you say somethin’ like that?”

“Well, obviously I’m doin’ somethin’ wrong, right?” He sighed again. “I told you about my life before kids. I tried to scare the sense into ya but I guess it didn’t work.”

“It’s not you, Mr. C. I think it’s me.”

They pulled up to the curb in front of the house. The front door was open, the Curtis family waiting for them to come home. Darrel turned the car off and they both just sat.

“Why do you think it’s you?”

“Ev-everythin’ ya told me- I remembered it all and I did it anyway.” Dallas looked down at his lap, shame written all over his face. “I-I know I disappointed you but I just couldn’t help it. What is so wrong with me?”

So it was himself that he was mad at.

“Dally,” Mr. Curtis started, shifting in his seat to face him. “I think that deep down, you want to be a good kid. You can be a good kid, but it takes a lot of effort, ya know?” He paused, trying to find the right words. “You-you’ve had a rough life already, kid. I grew up a hood, too, but you’ve had it worse than I ever did. That-that messes with your head, okay? Makes the wires cross, ya know? I don’t think it’s entirely your fault.”

He wasn’t sure, but Darrel thought he heard a sniffle. Dally looked out the window, quickly turning so his face would be hidden.

“I want to try harder, but I don’t know how,” the poor kid said, quietly. The older man clapped him on the shoulder, squeezing tightly.

“You can always come to me. You know that, right?”

“‘Course I do.”

“You trust me, don’t you?”

Dallas hesitated for a second. Trust. Four little letters than meant so much more than just a word. Darrel imagined the word didn’t have much stock in this poor kid’s life. Abused and neglected by his own father after his mother’s death with no siblings or other family to help care for him. Did he even know what trust was?

“I-I think so, Mr. C.”

Darrel nodded, even if Dally wasn’t watching.

“Hey, look at me,” he ordered. Dallas turned, his eyes lined with red, mouth a thin, drooping line. “Any time. Day or night. Three in the afternoon or three in the morning. You come talk to me. Okay? You can count on me.”

“Okay,” he breathed, a relieved sigh escaping through his lips. He lips tugged upward.

“Now c’mon,” Mr. Curtis started and went for the door handle. “I bet Mrs. C.’s got somethin’ good cookin’ for lunch.”

“Yeah, sure.”

They both finally exited the car. Darrel tossed his arm around Dallas’s shoulders as they walked up the steps to the porch.

“You are a good kid, Dallas. A little misguided, maybe, but a good kid. Don’t you ever forget that and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, okay?”

“Thanks, Mr. C.”

He released the kid from his hold and followed him into the house, letting the screen door slam behind them.

[klklovesmovies]

What if your favorite movie was remade today, who would be your dream team? 

The Outsiders Dream Team

Director: David Fincher – (Gone Girl, the Social Network, Fight Club, Seven, Zodiac, and Panic Room)Francis Ford Coppola (The Godfather, The Godfather Part 2) directed “The Outsiders” in 1983 and filling his shoes would be a tough act to follow. The perfect director to remake “The Outsiders” would be David Fincher (Gone Girl, The Social Network, Fight Club, and Seven.) Fincher resume is impressive when it comes to action thrillers and drama. Fincher could take the novel and previous movie and enhance the characters, pivotal plot points and intensity of the story.

Screenwriter:  Joel Coen & Ethan Coen (Fargo, No Country for Old Men, The Big Lebowski, and True Grit) I am throwing a curve ball and having the Coen brothers write the script for the remake of “The Outsiders.” The Coen brothers have an excellent resume when it comes to creativity and screen writing. Even though the script would be faithful to the book, the Coen brothers could be creative and put their own vision and spin on characters and the plot. As much as I love the novel and movie, I feel the writing could improve the emotional drive of certain side characters.  

Cinematography: Roger Deakins – (Sicario, Prisoners, True Grit, No Country of Old Men, and A Beautiful Mind)Basically, to pick a cinematographer, I thought of some of the most beautiful shot movies that I have seen recently, Sicario. I did a quick google search and quickly it became very clear to me that Roger Deakins would be the best fit for the Outsiders remake. Stevie Wonder original sung “Stay Gold” in the original 1983 movie. I narrowed my artists down to Bruno Mars, John Legend, but ultimately decided to go with the Queen bee; Beyoncé. After carefully thought and various debates with myself, I selected my dream cast if “The Outsiders” were to get remade today. I must note, if this would five years ago, my cast would be completely different. It broke my heart that Jake Gyllenhaal didn’t make the cut. His career has taken off and it would be hard for me to believe Gyllenhaal could play a twenty year old. CAST:

Ponyboy Curtis –Finn Wolfhard 

Ponyboy was one of the hardest to cast since he’s the protagonist and youngest (14 years old) of the Greasers. I needed to pick an actor would be able to have chemistry with his brothers, Greasers, and the Socs. Finding an actor, that could be convincing as a fourteen year was difficult until I thought of the hottest show on Netflix, “Stranger Things.” Finn Wolfhard plays Mike on “Stranger Things” and he’s one of the best aspects of the show. It makes perfect sense to me now and couldn’t think of any other actor to portray Ponyboy.

Johnny Cade –Timothee Chalamet

Johnny is an important character and essential the heart of the story. He’s a child of abuse and considers the Greasers his family. Casting Johnny, I needed to find an actor would was older but looked young. Timothee Chalamet came up in a search and quickly casted him as Johnny. He’s been in minor roles in films (Interstellar) and could see “The Outsiders” as his big break.

Dallas Winston – Ezra Miller

Dallas is the toughest among the greasers, very protective of Johnny and has the James Dean’s vibe. I am casting Ezra Miller as Dallas because Ezra Miller is a fantastic actor. It was an interesting choice but I think Ezra Miller can bring out Dallas’ charm, defensiveness, and self-destructive attitude.

Darrell Curtis (Darry) – Aaron Taylor Johnson

Darrell was the hardest to me to cast because I need an actor to be able to convincing have the presence as the oldest and father figure of the group. Aaron Taylor Johnson entered my mind as his performance in “Nocturnal Animals” was hauntingly disturbing.  Johnson’s resume is impressive as I think he will be able to convey Darry’s emotions in more body movement then dialogue.

Sodapop Curtis –Tye Sherdian

Sodapop is the best looking, laid back, easy going guy of the group. He is the middle child and does his best to help his older brother Darry and younger brother Sodapop. Tye Sheridan is a popular, attractive, young actor is definitely can play the sensitive, heart of gold, Sodapop.  

Cherry Valance -Sophia Turner

This was a no brainer for me. Who’s a popular actress that has a bright future ahead for them and happens to be a red-head? Sophia Turner! She’s beautiful and already has an impressive resume with “Games of Thornes” and playing Jean Grey in “X-Men Apocalypse”.  Sophia will be able to bring Cherry’s beauty, innocent, heart and fieriness.  

Two Bit Mathews –Taron Egerton

I love Taron Egerton and I knew I had to cast him in the remake. Emilio Estevez originally played the humorous and tough Two Bit Matthew, so I want to pick an actor who’s known and is going to have a successful career.

Steve Randall – Tom Holland

Steve Randall is Sodapop’s best friend and has a minor role but was originally played by the one of only Tom Cruise. So, I knew I had to pick a young actor who is going to have a massive career like Tom Cruise. So, I picked another Tom. Tom Holland is the next Spiderman. He’s young, talented, and can easily pull off Steve’s charm.

Bob Sheldon –KJ Apa

Bob was the first character I cast because I can perfectly vision KJ Apa (Riverdale) playing a drunk, entitled jock. He’s great on Riverdale and can easily portray Bob.

Randy Anderson – Josh Hutcherson

Josh Hutcherson is famous for this role as Peeta in the Hunger Game Series, so the reality of him taking a minor role might be hard to believe. I think Josh can portray Randy, Bob’s best friend in a realistic way. He has a crucial part towards the end of the book with Ponyboy and I can see Josh giving Randy more depth. This was fun to do! Think of your favorite movie and create your own cast!

[2knightt]

Dialogue 2 with Sodapop Curtis :) ?

Thank you, and take your time with these asks 💕

you’re tew sweet anon oml🤍

-“can we cuddle?”

soda sighed as he took off his DX uniform, throwing his hat off to the side. you sat on his bed, reading a book. you’d been there the night before and just didn’t bother goin’ back home. laziness, or somethin’.

he flopped right into bed, sitting right beside you. soda sighed once, and then again, and then another time. you chuckled, realizing he’s trying to grab your attention.

you closed the book, placing it on the nightstand beside you.

“what is it, soda?”

“…can we cuddle?”

he asked, inching closer to you slowly. a small part of you wanted to tease him, but eventually decided against it. you wrapped your arms around his neck as he pulled you closer to him.

half of your body was ontop of him while the other was still on the bed. sodapop had an arm around your waist loosely, a hand on your thigh.

you listened to his heartbeat speed up for a moment before slowing down. no matter how many times you two are like this—he will always get nervous.

[dallaswinstonsleatherjacket]

for the dialogue promps, could i request stevepop with 14 pls?

Hi ok yes so this is very VERY cheesy and I might re-write it at some point, but here you go lol

Steve never really knew what to make of Sodapop Curtis. 

He was handsome, sure, everyone knew that. Pony called him movie star handsome, the type of looks that could get you somewhere, if you knew where to go.

He was funny, too, and although Steve rarely laughed, he found himself laughing more around Soda, because his laugh was loud and contagious and the way his lips curled and his eyes sparked when he was laughing made Steve wish he was funny, just a little, so he could make Soda laugh like that. 

But he made Steve feel like he was okay for a little bit, or like he was going to be. He was his best friend, they rolled around and wrestled and worked at the DX together, and that was enough for Steve. For now, at least. 

Sodapop, on the other hand, knew exactly what he thought about Steve. 

He had always been a little shy about liking boys, and while he was never shy, he felt as though maybe it was bad, maybe he should just settle down with a girl somewhere and he would be okay, cause maybe that’s all he needed, was the right one. 

But he knew, he had already met the right one. They just weren’t a girl. And they could never love him back. 

*

It was months before Soda built up the courage to talk to Steve. Because, god, if he didn’t like this, if he called Soda a pansy and no-good, he would lose a friend, too. His best friend, at that. 

It was late, getting darker by the minute, and Steve was smoking on the steps, glaring out at the horizon for no reason Soda could see. Dally had gone home, taking Johnny with him to Bucks for the night, Two-bit had headed home, and Darry was cooking dinner, with Pony on the couch reading.

It was as good a time as any, is there really any good time to tell your friend you love him?

Soda opened the door, shutting it quietly behind him. He stood a moment before carefully sitting down next to him, pressing his hands against the splintering wood of the front porch stairs, hoping this was the right thing to do. 

“Hey, Curtis”

The voice was soft, strangely soft, but Soda brushed it off as the smoke, and the night, and the fact that he was surprised he could hear anything over his pounding heartbeat. 

“Hi, Steve. You alright?”

Steve blew out a puff of smoke, watching it swirl upwards. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just thinkin’, y’know?”

Soda nodded, tugging anxiously on his hair, not really caring about the grease coming off onto his hands.

Steve turned to look at Soda, exhaling a little bit of smoke towards him. Studying him carefully, Steve watched as he looked down, fiddling with his flannel in between his fingers. 

“Listen, Steve…” Soda stopped again, not really knowing how to continue or what to say.

Steve stayed quiet, hoping Soda would talk again.

“Can I-can I tell you something?”

Steve, who had looked back down towards the steps, immediately looked back up at Soda, eyes softening, just a little.

“Course, Soda, you can always talk to me, you know that.”

“Alright,” Soda sighed, closing his eyes and resting his head in his hands. 

“I don’t wanna..scare you off or nothin’, and if you don’t-don’t like it or somethin’-we’ll figure it out, but-goddammit, I think I’m gay, Steve.”

Steve inhaled sharply, choking on the smoke, and coughed, Soda watching slightly worriedly.

Steve was angry, cause god, for a second there his heart had jumped a little, and he had felt like maybe everything was okay, everything could work out, and he could maybe get to love. Was he gay, did that make him gay? Why did he think that anyone could love him, never mind Soda?

“You alright?” Soda said, again, and Steve nodded, so Soda continued. 

“And I think-I think I like you, Steve, I really do. Maybe I even...maybe I even love you, I don't know. And I’m sorry if that's weird for you to hear...I just needed to say it-” he cut himself off, looking desperately at Steve.

Steve was silent, and he wanted to say something, anything, to let Soda know that it was okay, that he accepted him and that he loved him back and everything was going to be fine.

But he couldn't get the words out of his mouth.

Soda was terrified, cause Steve wasn't talking, and usually he responded right away, especially with something important...what if he didn't accept him? What if they weren't friends anymore?

Finally Steve spoke, his voice hoarse and tired.

“Why?”

Soda jumped a little, before looking over at him.

“Why-why what?”

“Why do you love someone like me?” Steve's eyes were cold, and he stood, turning around to face Soda.

“I don’t know...I’m sorry-”

“No-Its fine-God, I don't know. I gotta go, Soda, I'll see you later.”

“Don’t-” Soda tried, but Steve had already left, the metal gate slamming behind him.