#socialdragonfly

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[socialdragonflytarot27]

[socialdragonflytarot27]

[socialdragonflytarot27]

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Our subconscious programs come from the ways we had to cope with our environment as children. These programs are how we self soothed and met our own needs during times of stress, fear, or neglect. It can be difficult to act on the changes we know we need to make as adults if we haven’t addressed the underlying origin of the behavior which stems from the program. Unless we re-program our subconscious mind we will continue with patterns of self sabotage, perpetuating cycles of shame and the illusion of powerlessness. You can change! You can stick with it! But first you must address the subconscious program at the root of the issue.

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SHAME IS THE GREATEST GATEKEEPER

🦋If you’ve made it out of your past a stronger, wiser, more heart centered person- why would you beat yourself up for the circumstances that gave you the gift of your level up?! Hold your head high, and feel gratitude for how far you’ve come.

🦋When people ask you how you don’t look anything like where you came from-what will you tell them? Will you share the joy of your accomplishment with them? Or will you let your ego convince you it’s better to pretend you didn’t go through what you went through or make the mistakes you made to prevent someone else from judging you?

🦋Let me let you in on a little secret 🤫 PEOPLE ARE GOING TO JUDGE YOU ANYWAY. And that judgment they project onto you only means one thing: they carry the energy of shame within themselves, so they want you to feel ashamed too.

🦋People who struggle with shame often have parents who used things like fear and shame to control their children and coerce them into behaving in a more palatable way. You can break the cycle of wounding, judgement, and fear by being proud of who you are and who you used to be.

🦋When you refuse to allow yourself to be controlled by shame you show others there’s another way to live. You show people there is freedom from the fear of what other people think of you. They’ll think “if they can do it, I can do it too”. Choosing to live in shame blocks the pathway for others to free themselves from shame too.

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They will NEVER apologize for what they did to you.

You don’t have to forgive them.

But if you do, there’s less of a chance you will have to experience this pain, rejection, and betrayal without an apology again, because once you learn the lesson-it disappears.

You see, your soul and their soul made an agreement before incarnating here. They agreed to hurt you, very badly, and they agreed to never apologize, and you agreed to allow it to happen. All for the purpose of the growth of your soul. So that you could learn what it means to forgive the unforgivable. So that you could learn what it feels like to embody a level of strength that most people NEVER have through many lifetimes.

You aren’t excusing what they did to you by forgiving them. You’re choosing to allow yourself to let go of the pain they caused. You’re choosing not to suffer anymore and allow them and their opinions of you to have power over you anymore.

When you allow an outside person, circumstance, or situation to cause you to change your energy or internal state, you are losing power. It becomes a drain on your life force energy everytime you think about what they did or said to you. Everytime you replay it over in your head and imagine what you could or should have said, you’re losing energy that you could be using to co-create the life you truly want.

The truth is, you can’t control the person who hurt you. You can’t change them, and you certainly cannot make them take responsibility or do the right thing even though it’s obvious to everyone that they were in the wrong and should apologize to you.

But you CAN control yourself and be responsible for your own energy. The pain and wounds they caused are not your fault, but healing yourself is ultimately your responsibility.

Doing the work, trying your best to focus on what you can learn from the pain they have caused, and shifting your focus back to being in control and taking responsibility for yourself and your own energy healing will signal to the universe that you’ve learned the lesson and that it doesn’t need to keep repeating.

Learn what you came here as a soul to learn. Step back into your personal power. All that pain wasn’t for nothing. It wasn’t in vein if you learned from it.

Sometimes learning can look like self empowerment in the form of forgiveness. Sometimes it looks like humility; being bullied and told over and over again you’ll fail, them watching you succeed, and when you get the chance to rub it in their face, choosing not to because you let all the pain of what they did to you go. Sometimes learning the lesson looks like not letting the pain and resentment control you anymore, being kind even when you have the right to give them a taste of their own medicine. Sometimes it can look like helping others learn to heal the same way you had to. Or it can look like praying for the person/people who hurt you instead of wishing bad on them. Learning can also look like thanking God for revealing to you what you were supposed to learn from this shitty situation, even though you can’t possibly fathom what the lesson could even be. If you don’t know, ask, and it will be revealed to you.

You can do it, if you so choose. If not, that’s up to you. And I’m sure no one would judge you if you chose not to forgive. I don’t judge you if you can’t forgive. I understand. The choice is yours. And no matter what you choose, I send love to you if you resonated with this. 💚