#social anxiety is telling me he’s gonna hate me even though I know that’s not the case

[unfunnyaceartist]

Me when @kovox

[bimobuddy]

Learning to Trust

SFW Hazbin TK fic

Alright people hear me out with this one

Major Spoilers

CW: Brief mention of anxiety disorders, swearing

Lee!Vox, Ler!Alastor

It's kind of a ship? The Aromantic 'Squish' equivalent of a ship. Well not yet anyway, they're still rivals in this, but I might make a part 2 that explores that a little more

It was gonna be Valentino and Vox, but I'm mad at Val so he got his boyfriend privileges taken away >:(

This might get kinda angsty, sorry in advance

Summary: Vox is glitching out and having connection issues, so he bites the bullet and asks help from the only other demon who can help him. Unfortunately with that demon being Alastor, they run into some issues.

It had started happening after the battle between the exterminators and the sinners. The War between Heaven and Hell. Vox had been watching it all happen on his TV, mostly keeping an eye on Alastor. Originally the plan was to watch by himself, but Velvet insisted they all watch together, and he couldn't really think of a good enough lie to tell her no, so he gave in.

He had spent the whole night playing up how much he hated Alastor, which is easy when your entire life and afterlife, you've been a TV Show Host. Many years of acting. At one point he even hoped if he got too obnoxious, the other two might leave, but used to his antics, they stayed.

But inside he was immensely stressed out. Yes he and Alastor were rivals, but there was something about the rivalry he needed. Something about it he liked. He couldn't really explain it himself, and he preferred not to think about it, preferring to tell himself that he just enjoyed hating the Radio Host.

So when he watched Alastor almost get killed by Adam, seeing him actually vulnerable for once... It scared him.

Then started the glitching. He knew it was from stress, the feeling was very familiar to when he was a human with an anxiety disorder. Only instead of a racing heart and suddenly feeling faint and warm, his anxiety came in the form of glitching, as his mind couldn't process everything, and showed it visibly on his screen.

He had tried for hours to make it stop, to try and fix it himself, but he couldn't see the mirror properly through all the glitching. That and the glitching made it hard to think.

He considered going to Velvet, but despite her phone and social media use, she didn't actually know anything about the tech itself. There was one more option, but he really didn't want to even consider it.

Though as he started to glitch out again, he decided to just bite the bullet.

-

Vox found himself scaling up the side of the Hotel, climbing toward Alastor's radio tower.

He'd rather fall to his death than use the doors and ask to see him. As he reached the top, he frantically tapped on the window, feeling another glitch about to happen.

Nothing.

He started tapping again, even faster this time.

Still nothing.

He made a fist and drew his arm back to just break the window in-

*click*

"Well this is quite the predicament." Alastor said, leaning over the windowsill. "Shut up asshole, just let me in." Vox grumbled. Alastor's grin seemed to widen. "And why shouldn't I just give you a little nudge?" The radio host questioned, placing his cane lightly against Vox's screen.

Vox couldn't help but notice that his cane had been seemingly glued back together and.. bandaged up? He didn't have time to think about that. "I uh.." He trailed off, only for Alastor to push his cane a little harder into Vox's screen. He tried to speak again, but he glitched, losing his grip and slipping.

But he didn't fall. Through all the TV static, he felt his wrists being grabbed, as he was pulled upward. He still couldn't focus much, but he recognized that he had dropped to a hardwood floor now.

"My, this certainly is quite a problem.. For you, anyway, I find it entertaining." Alastor chuckled. Vox pressed a palm to the cool floor to try and ground himself. Gradually, the static cleared itself. "You know what I found interesting? That someone as strong and as feared as you got cut down by an angel." He said, glaring.

The room got deadly silent, Alastor's smile much more strained now.

"... I need your help, okay?"

"And why should I help you? Especially after that nice little comment you made."

"Listen, I'm- Ugh. Forget it, I don't know why I even both-øťhəred-" Vox had stood to leave, only for another glitch to have him leaning against the wall for support.

"It appears neither of us are in great shape." Alastor said, begrudgingly lifting Vox by his upper arm and setting him in one of the swivel chairs. He crossed his arms and waited for Vox's glitching to pass.

After a solid minute, Vox groaned, his head starting to hurt. "So what made you think you'd come to someone who famously hates television boxes for help? Especially when that person is a rival, an enemy, someone you've fought in the past?" Alastor asked.

Vox looked up at him, feeling that pit of anxiety in his stomach again. "I didn't know who else to go to. Valentino is useless, Velvet doesn't know shit about tech, and you're the only other demon who has seen me weak before."

Alastor took a moment to process that last part. He considered it. If he helped Vox, he risked being seen as soft. But if he didn't help him, what if it got worse, and he lost his nemesis, the pettiness that kept him going at times, that pushed him to be the best Host?

He sat down in his seat, across from Vox. "Do you trust me?" He asked. Vox thought for a moment. Did he? He must have if he came here. "I have to."

"Good enough." Alastor went to get started... "Wait how the hell do I do this? I'm more familiar with my own equipment."

Oh, right. Vox sighed. "The back of my monitor comes off. Just open it, and I'll instruct you from there." He said, turning around and removing his hat.

Alastor curled his fingers around the back panel of his monitor, causing Vox to jump a little. "If you want me to help you, sit still-" "I am, shut up." Alastor pulled the back panel off and was met with what to him looked like Alien technology.

After Vox had instructed him on what to do, he got to work. Though he didnt like working in silence, it felt a little too intimate, especially with his hands inside someone else's head.

"So what exactly caused this, if I may ask?" He questioned. "Stress. I start to glitch out when things are hard to process and I overload. Sometimes if the glitching gets too bad, I shut down, which I'd rather avoid."

"Shut down," Alastor repeated, "I thought if you 'shut down,' you'd die or something?" "No, no.. I can more closely compare it to burnout but ten times worse. Last time I shut down, it took me a week to recharge."

"Hm. And what caused you to become so stressed this time? Sure I've seen you briefly buffer and glitch during our fights, but never this bad." Alastor asked. Vox noticed the radio filter in his voice seemed to fade out. He was genuinely curious.

He didn't know what to say. More like he didn't know how to say it. How do you tell your rival of all people you were stressed because you saw them get hurt?

"Well? With how close I am to all these wires, I'd answer if I were you." Ah, his filter was back. "I just.. Got overworked." "Need I remind you how easy it would be for me to unplug some of these wires? Hm, this yellow one seems awfully loose-" "I was worried oka- Aha!"

...

"What do we have here?" Alastor asked, a smile evident in his voice. Vox froze. He actually didn't know 'what they had there.' That had never happened before.

"I-I don't know, but Alastor I swear to Satan himself- wahait- grr- Don't!" He gripped the armrests of his seat in a desperate attempt to hold still. He worried if he pulled away too fast, he'd accidentally rip a wire out.

It felt so weird. He could actually feel Alastor messing with the wires in his head, specifically the ones down at the bottom that ran down his neck and into his back. Each time the Radio host rolled one between his fingers, it sent what felt like electricity into his system. Thousands of little shocks that made him want to pull away and- No. He wouldn't, it was dumb, it was weak, and it wasn't like him.

Alastor grinned wider, finding it fun to mess with him. "Why Vox, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were ticklish." He said, rubbing the wires again, watching as Vox gripped the armrests tighter and scrunched his shoulders up. Alastor only grew more amused as he heard the other's fans whir to life as his ventilation system tried to cool him down.

Vox, however, felt like he was fighting for his life. His shoulders were shaking, his chest was spasming, and he felt his screen overheating. He was actively fighting back any noise that tried to escape. He refused to be seen as any weaker than he already was. "T-Tickl-what? The f-fuhuck is that? Thihis isn't a vihirus??"

Alastor paused. "You seriously have never heard of tickling? It's childsplay. Children often have tickle-fights with their siblings and friends. You've never even seen it?" "I never really had any friends."

There was a beat of silence.

"What about the other V's?"

"Gross, you think I'd let Valentino get anywhere near me? You know where his hands have been?"

"Where haven't they been is the real question."

Fuck, that got a laugh out of Vox. A real one too, not the fake rehearsed one he used in public or on TV. It was lighter than Alastor expected, genuine, and almost had a warm sound to it if you can imagine that.

And Alastor found himself wanting to hear it again. "I suppose I should get back to maintenance now shouldn't I?" He said, returning to his work, get making sure his hands brushed over the wires and cables occasionally. More than occasionally.

"A-Alastor- fuhuck- wahahait- *wheeeze* ahahahaha!" Vox found himself stomping the floor a little, since he was unable to pull away. He felt light scritching at the base of his neck, obviously intentional. "Yohohou ohold tihihimey prihick! I'll d-dehehe- dehehehahahaha!"

"Oh I'm sorry, you're going to what now? I can't exactly hear you." Alastor grinned. Both hands, or claws one should say, suddenly scritched at the back of his ribs.

Unable to control himself, Vox tossed his head back and laughed, and slammed backward, pressing his back into the seat. Alastor was quick to pull his hands back with a chuckle.

Vox's fans were whirring loudly. "You ahasshole, just finish fuckin' repairing me." "Oh I finished that ten minutes ago!" Alastor answered cheerfully, popping the back panel back into place in Vox's monitor.

Vox groaned, irritated.

"I still find it hard to believe you've never heard of tickling! Everyone knows about it. I'm even more surprised no one's ever found out by accident. Not even while reparing your monitor?"

"I fix myself, I don't trust anyone to touch me."

"You trusted me."

Vox turned his swivel chair around to face Alastor. "I did, yeah.."

Alastor tilted his head a little in curiosity. "And maybe you could trust me again. You never did tell me what got you so stressed." Vox rolled his eyes. "Yeah, because you started assaulting me before I could."

"Voxius."

"That's not- Did you just assign me a full name?"

"Yes, now quit stalling." Alastor said, latching a hand onto Vox's side. "WAIT-" He shouted before batting at his hand, huffing out chuckles. Alastor only crawled his hands up Vox's ribs before targeting his underarms.

"WAITFUCKTHATSWORSE!" He cackled out, slamming his arms down, trapping Alastor's hands. The Radio demon only chuckled. "You'll learn that when it comes to tickling, much like real fights, you're not supposed to let your opponent know exactly where your weak points are. Now I can do this." He stated before drilling his thumbs into Vox's underarms.

"FAHAHAHACK!" He shouted, kicking a leg out, much like a dog, whilst also trying to curl up in his chair to protect himself. "Thihihis ihihis rihihihidiculohohous!!"

"What's ridiculous is that you still haven't answered the question."

"YOHOU WOHONT LEHEHET MEHEHE!"

"Hm, fine." Alastor stopped and pulled his hands away. Vox tried to kick him but of course a tendril came out and grabbed his leg, as he expected.

Vox muttered something. "I'm sorry?" Alastor asked, leaning closer. Vox sighed. "I was worried." "About?"

"About you."

Alastor's eyes widened ever so slightly. Vox had been violently glitching out over him? "Why is that?" His voice was normal.

"You're my rival, so obviously I tuned in to watch the battle. I wanted to see if you'd get killed. Part of me obviously wanted it to happen, but when I saw that Angel snap your cane and actually hit you-" Alastor flinched at the memory, "Seeing you actually vulnerable like that.. I realized I didn't actually want to lose my one and only rival. As much as I hate ya, you do push me to come up with newer and better shows in order to compete with you."

"I... can't say I haven't thought the same thing. Because of you I have to write better scripts and find the best topics for my broadcast. Even though it's no question that I'm the best," he grinned as Vox frowned, "But I am the best because of you."

Vox wasn't sure what to say to that, having mixed feelings. Before he could overthink it, Alastor held a hand out. He took it, as the other demon helped him up. "Now, it's quite late, and you have a tight schedule, I'm sure." He opened the window, as a large tendril waited outside for Vox.

"I do appreciate you coming to check on me." He said before hurrying Vox out the window, as he sat on the tendril. "If you tell anyone I said that, I just might broadcast this newly discovered sensitivity of yours." He threatened.

There was the Alastor he knew and loved to hate.

"I won't, don't worry. I don't feel like explaining to anyone why I was over at your Radio Tower anyway. You hurry up and heal, Alastor, I want you in top shape for our next fight," He smirked, "Even I'm not low enough to kick someone while he's do-OOOWN-" The tendril suddenly dropped, pulling Vox down with it, where it would drop him off safely on the ground.

Alastor shut his window, and watched the TV show host leave down the hill. Never in a million years did he think Vox would ever trust him, nor did he ever think he'd help his rival.

But he couldn't deny that he had had a little fun that night, not only tickling him, but just talking and getting to know him a little.

This night might have made their rivalry slightly more complicated.

[httpscomexe]

Forbidden Secret Desire 2

Summary: He tries so hard to take you out of your comfort space, and you try so hard to co-operate. Only forgetting a majority of the day as the time ticks by. But when you finally get to bed, you immediately relax. Now the only thing that annoys you is this weird sound.

(Find What I’m currently writing by checking my pinned post)

Parings: Logan Howlett x Reader

Warnings: (Individual warnings per chapter) Manipulation, anxiety, social dissociation, hidden cameras, a lot of awkwardness. THIS is going to be a dark one. If you are not into non-con fics, then I suggest you don’t get too attached. There will be VERY detailed descriptions in the near future.

Word Count: 3285 (Find all chapters here) Chapter 3

Tags: @remmyj10 @sammyluvsfics

P.S. If you’d like to be tagged, ask in the comments, you also have permission to send an ask, but make sure it is NOT anonymous, so I know your username, don’t worry, I’m scared of confrontation too. But this is a SAFE SPACE where I will not judge. Thank you again.

“Guys, meet Y/N.”

You hated it already. I was forcing you to meet people, and everyone he introduced you to gave you the side eye. Some didn’t even say hi. Except Kurt.

“Oh, hey Y/N.” Kurt was the first one to step away from the small group of kids, then he outstretched his arms to hug you, causing you to have to uncross your arms and embrace it. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”

“Yea, I’ve been busy.” You tell him quietly, not wanting anyone else to hear you.

“Well these are my other friends.” He nods towards the small group of people. “Storm, Jane, Havok, and Cyclops.” They awkwardly wave towards you, but the one named “Havok” smirks down at you. Charming. You roll your eyes a little.

“You don’t have to call me Havok, Alex works too.” He tells you, reaching his hand out and letting you shake it.

“We’re going to the mall later, would you like to come with us?” Kurt asks you, but instead of answering, you turn your head to look towards Logan.

“Her and I have plans, maybe another day. I was gonna show her around, she hasn’t really gotten to go anywhere so I figured I’d take her out.” He reaches his hand up, and gently places his palm on your shoulder.

“Oh okay, maybe another time then.” Kurt sounded disappointed, but you paid no mind to it. You could finally go out in public without being stared at or hated.

“Well, it’s nice seeing you youngins, but she and I are gonna get going.” Logan looks back down at you and you smile softly, still feeling awkward.

After saying some goodbyes and exchanging a few more words, the two of you finally turned around to leave and then you weren’t so sure you’d be able to socially enjoy yourself outside the mansion anyways. But Logan seemed excited, and you didn’t want to ruin that.

Now he was standing outside of your room, waiting for you to get ready for the day. You weren’t exactly sure what style was popular, you had been stuck in the mansion for over two years now after all, so you just threw on whatever you felt would be acceptable for going to the mall.

Just a simple grey sweater and your favourite black short skirt, then you threw your hair up into a messy bun before shoving your phone in your pocket. You don’t have a pocket though. You bite your lip with some frustration as you realise your skirt didn’t have a pocket. “Damnit.” You mumble. You didn’t have a purse either since you never expected to leave the mansion anytime soon. You can do without your phone for the day. You tell yourself, opening a drawer and stuffing your phone inside before closing it and checking yourself in the mirror.

“All ready?” You nod, then begin walking down the hall with him to the entrance of the mansion. “We're just gonna go out shopping a little then we’ll get some snacks and come back, shouldn’t take too long.” He tells you.

“Uh, okay.” You twiddle your thumbs in front of you nervously. “Sounds good.” You chuckle awkwardly, then follow him to one of the cars in the parking lot.

It was a rusted old ford pickup truck. You honestly hadn’t expected anything more from him, you definitely didn’t expect some Honda Civic or more clean and collected car. HillBilly it is.

He uses his key to open the driver's door and as you pull on the handle to the passenger side it doesn’t open and your cheeks heat up in embarrassment. Then he reaches for the door from the driver's side and unlocks it for you before you step in and sit down. The seat was hot from the truck sitting in the sun all day. “What kind of music do you like?” He asks you, turning on the engine. “Or do you prefer the quiet?”

This literally couldn’t feel any more awkward for you as you felt your chest tighten up, like you were already doing something wrong. “Nothing really in specific.” You tell him, and he turns a radio dial on the dash until some country music starts playing. Fuck this is so awkward.

The ride was awkward. There were maybe a total of ten words spoken. There was so much traffic. And one of the roads was closed, adding about an extra twenty minutes of awkward silence. It literally could not get any worse. You tell yourself as he finally pulls into the parking lot at the mall, somehow managing to find a spot near the front, surprising you considering how damned busy it was just on the sidewalks.

You both stepped out of his truck, and you immediately went to his side, staying by him like a child who’s reliant on their dad to keep them safe. You see him smile out of the corner of your eye before he hangs his arm around the back of your neck, leading you to the front of the mall. You figured it couldn’t be THAT bad, right? Oh my fucking God why are there so many people holy shit bring me home. Was the very first thought that ran rampant in your mind. The moment the automatic doors opened they welcomed you into a living and breathing hot and sweaty circus of hell.

There were people who didn’t bother you so much, they were just walking with a few bags in their hands and minding their own business. Then there were families which honestly only raised the body heat in the building as they ran around trying to catch up to their sons and daughters. But the most annoying of all were the little stands in the middle of the mall and next to the escalators that were blasting music as they sold little simple things like fidget spinners or Mario plushies that looked like they had been through war.

It was only when someone got in your face with a coupon that you finally broke and stopped, then stared up at Logan. “I don’t like it, I wanna-”

“It’s a lot busier than usual.” He tells you, shoving his hands in his pockets. He knew you wanted to leave, and that it was a lot. But he was determined to walk you through the mall. “So what store should we go into first? Maybe we can get you something? Do you like jewellery? Or a purse maybe?” He throws some ideas at you, attempting to distract you from your inner turmoil.

And of course, it works.

“Uh yea, sure. I mean, I don’t really know any stores, I honestly wouldn't know where to go.”

“Okay, well let's start with something simple, there's a clothing store just down there.” He tells you, nodding his head past you, in the previous direction you were walking in.

“Okay…” You whisper, then step back to his side as you two continue your walk down to the store he was talking about. You hated it, but he was trying so hard to make you feel included.

“Excuse me ma’am, would you like a free sample?” A man asked you, holding a large silver pizza plate in front of you just as you had begun your walk. “It’s sweet, and everyone does say you are what you eat!” He says excitedly and you can’t help but think he sounds like a clown from a movie.

“Uh, no-”

“What is it?” Logan steps forward, letting go of your hand which you hadn’t even realised he was holding, to grab two of the little cups, handing you one.

“They’re cinnamon rolls. Just like the normal ones, but they’re mini.” He tells you both. Watching as Logan takes a bite out of his, and you hesitate at first but then take a small bite out of yours.

“Good?” Logan asks you, and he stares as you use your tongue to lick some of the icing off of your lip. He seemed hypnotised before you nodded your head to answer his question.

“If you’d like to buy the bigger version, you can get two for $7 if you go to Jackie's Pastries on the second floor.” The other man tells you, then swiftly walks away to a family, offering each of them a sample and he laughs as a younger child takes three.

“Wanna get some? They’re good?” He grabs your hand gently again, but you notice this time, of course, you don’t say anything about it.

“Sure, they taste good.”

“Good, I’ll lead the way.” He tells you before taking small steps to match your speed and he makes his way to an escalator. God did you hate escalators and elevators.

“Are there no normal stairs?” You ask him nervously.

“No, they’re becoming more modern as we speak.” He tells you before stepping onto the next stair that comes out of the track, and you make an anxious and quick step forward with him, putting you both on the same stair, causing you to sort of mush against his side as his hand gently squeezes yours a little tighter. You clench your jaw in embarrassment, you’ve never felt more exposed and awkward in your life.

“So what would you like?” He asks you, as you both wait in line, by the time you were behind the last five people, you had unconsciously held his right hand with both of your hands, but you still hadn’t even noticed it. “Just the cinnamon rolls, or something else?”

“Uh…” You take a deep breath in, and look up at the sign above the workers as one of the people ahead of you order icecream and waffle cones, drizzled with chocolate syrup. “Yea, I think?”

“You think?” He chuckles a little, looking down at his hand wrapped in both of yours as you unconsciously pick at his skin. Another thing you would feel ashamed of if you noticed. “How about we get you a cinnamon joy bowl.” He tells you. “It’s got cookie dough ice cream, a cinnamon bun on top, and 3 french toast sticks on the side all drizzled with vanilla icing.” He tells you. Sounds like a heart attack waiting to happen. 

“Sure.” End me faster you delicious snack. You both step forward as you’re next in line.

“Anything to drink?” You shrug. “How about just some water.” You nod, and he sighs a little, then the people ahead of you finish ordering as well, leaving you both in line now. “Hey, can we get a cinnamon bowl with two scoops of icecream and then water? Thank you.” He tells the cashier up front, then he pays and you both step away, letting the person behind you order next as you both stand waiting for his name to be called, and you continue to unconsciously pick at his hand with your thumb.

“So after this, we can stop by a toy store I think you’ll love?”

“Uh, okay.”

“Are you still nervous?”

“What? What makes you think I’m nervous?” You chuckle, and he looks down at your hands. “Oh, oh I’m so sorry…” You apologise quickly as you move your hands and see the little red spot you’ve created on the back of his hand. “I didn’t even realise I was-”

“It’s okay, bub.” He laughs lightly, then swings his arm around you again and pulls you in close to his side. “I’ve had much worse.” He jokes, making you laugh a little. Why would you laugh at that? He’s literally been shot!

“Logan?” A voice says, bringing your attention to the worker behind the counter holding the bowl of sweets, and Logan drops his arm to hold your hand again and pulls you with him to retrieve it.

“Thank you ma’am.” Then he takes you away from the counter, constantly leading you around, knowing you’d stand like a sitting duck if he wasn’t by your side this entire time.

“Try it. Any good?” He asks you, walking over to a metal table with two seats, dragging a chair back for you to sit in.

“Thank you. Yes, it’s good.” You tell him, sitting down and placing the little bowl on the table in the middle, handing him the second spoon and watching him as he takes the plastic off of his spoon.

You both relaxed for about thirty minutes, just shoving your mouth with sweets. You don’t even notice how he takes small bites, letting you take the bigger bites to make sure you eat at least some of it. And you eat a lot of it, not even noticing how he lets you have the majority. He knew it would for sure brighten your mood to have some food and sweets in your body.

As soon as you were both done,he stood up and threw the empty bowl in the trash. Ugh… This is so awkward. You keep telling yourself it’ll get better, but of course, it doesn’t.

The entire trip to the mall, from getting into his truck to leaving the mall in the late afternoon was nothing but awkward for you. Your anxiety got the best of you, and you felt like you couldn’t breathe at times. The only time you actually were excited was when he took you to a little shop called “Build a Bear.”

It was stressful. To the point where you wouldn’t be able to recollect the memories even if you wanted to. As you both returned to the truck, you finally started coming back to your head. With your arms crossed you watched as he put a few bags worth of items on the back seats. There had been a few conversations on the way back, which you had brainlessly answered, not a single actual thought had been on your mind, you were just so emotionally exhausted and your brain only registered a few moments. But the last conversation to end the trip was the most conversation you think you’d had.

“You like that bear huh?” He chuckles a little as he puts the truck in park and looks down at your lap, the little brown build a bear wearing a tutu sitting on your legs.

“Yea…” You say quietly, then look up at him.

“You okay, bub?” He asks, reaching over and resting his hand on the seat behind your head.

“Yea, why?”

“You seem… I don’t know…”

“Sorry… I’m just really tired… We were out for a while.” You say nervously, leaning back in your seat and playing with the little bear by moving his hands a little.

“It’s alright.” He smiles softly, then gently pushes some of your hair behind your ear that had fallen in your face from looking down. “Lets get inside, it’s getting dark out.” He grunts a little as he gets out of the truck and you get out a moment after.

He walks you to your room and sets the bags down for you. “Thank you.” You mumble.

“Of course.” He looks back down at you, still holding the bear in your hands as you stared mindlessly at the floor where the bags were. “Well, I hope you sleep well tonight. Sorry if I put too much on you.”

“Oh, no. You didn’t put too much on me, I had fun. Plus I needed to get out.” You laugh a little and he smiles, something you realised he does only when you’re smiling or laughing.

“Good, good. Well, I’ll see you tomorrow, in class. I’m substituting for Xavier so you’ll have two classes with me.” He sighs a little.

“Oh, okay. Then yea, see you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, bub.” He hugs you from the side, and you only lean into the hug, then he starts walking to your door to leave your room, but stops with his hand on the doorknob. “Oh, one more thing, can I ask you something?” He turns around, his hand falling from the knob.

“Uh yea, of course what’s up?”

“Do you have any zip ties?” He tilts his head a little in question. “I know that’s a weird question, I was just curious.” He adds.

“Uh yea, they’re in my closet somewhere, hold on.” You tell him, placing you bear on your bed for a moment to walk into your closet.

You checked some shelves and drawers, not finding anything. But you knew you had some in your closet. Where did I put you..? You ask yourself, then your hand comes across a bag of long green zip ties, you remember you had used them for some projects since they were easier to notice than plain white or black ties.

“Does it matter what… colour they are?” You ask him, stepping out of your closet and closing the closet door slowly as you see him holding your bear. “I uh, have these green ones but that’s it.” You tell him, and he sets your bear up on your desk, facing the room.

“Nah, colour doesn't matter. I should only need like six though.” He says, noticing you were holding a bag of about thirty ties.

“Oh okay here.” You count as you take them out of the bag, only six, and then hand them to him. “What do you need them for?” You laugh a little, what could he possibly need zip ties for?

“Oh well I have my own home away from the mansion, I just needed something to be tied up.” He tells you nonchalantly. “Anyways, thank you darlin’, I appreciate it. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” You smiled softly up at him, his eyes looked almost black as he stared down at you.

“See you tomorrow.”

Then he leaves, closing the door behind him which you promptly lock so nothing else can bother you for the rest of the day, while you were going to be sleeping. Taking one look at the bags of items he purchased for you, you quickly decided you would deal with it tomorrow.

You reached behind you and took the back of your shirt in your hands before pulling it over your head, then removed your little skirt and discarded both clothes items in your little basket of dirty laundry. Then you reach behind you to unclasp your bra, which you threw on top of your sweater and skirt before walking over to your desk, reaching for one of the washed tank tops in your clean laundry pile just sitting on your chair, but a quiet clicking sound catches your attention. You look up, and see nothing, so you assume your neighbours are doing something, then you begin to put your top on, reaching up to get it on, and you hear another click. What is that stupid sound? You wonder, looking over at your desk. Then you realise it’s probably your phone, which you just remember you had shoved into your desk before leaving this morning. So you stop freaking out, and take the phone out, immediately going to silence it, but it was already silenced. You assume it was just a glitch, then turn all of your lights out and finally crawl under the covers of your bed.

“What a long day.” A long sigh comes from your lips as you lie your head back on the pillow, then you remember your bear was still sitting on your desk. You immediately push past the thought of getting up to bring it to bed with you, you were too damned tired, so you just block out everything, your room completely silent as you stare at the ceiling. A faint whirring sound coming from across the room, and your bear staring at you while you sleep…

[gojos-thot-patrol]

I don’t know bout you but I’m introverted af. How would the jjk dudes treat an introverted and shy partner? 😊

AHH I love this request!! though, I will say I also have extreme social anxiety and I think that may have bled through so keep that in mind!

Now Presenting...

Starring: Satoru Gojo, Suguru Geto, Kento Nanami, and Ryomen Sukuna

Satoru Gojo

Gojo is going to be a hard one to deal with if you’re an introvert, I’m not gonna lie homies

He is extremely extroverted and loves to be around people.

He actually kinda has to be around people, least he lose his frickin mind

But, he does try to do better and pick up on your nonverbal cues

If you guys are out and he notices you getting overwhelmed, he tries to separate you from the situation

And while he loves hang outs, kick backs, nights out ect, he also loves just hanging out with you at home, quietly watching you play games or read together

I will say he does fall into the trap of finding your shyness cute.

Your flustered body language as you try to hide yourself away in social situations, He finds it cute!

And I honestly think he has a little bit of a hard time understanding your discomfort being around friends.

I mean, think about it. He’s a lonely guy with not a lot of friends. Gojo loves to attend social gatherings and hang outs, because they make him less lonely.

Why would anyone want to be lonely?

I also think he would have a pretty hard time giving you space ngl

Like, you just want to read alone but he wants to be right next to you. 

So, you have to be blunt with no room for misinterpretation when you need space. Just like real life!

I don’t think it would hurt his feelings, don’t worry. He’d be happy you can be so honest with him

He does try to adapt to you and your needs, but ya gotta give him some time

Suguru Geto

BESTIES, HE RUNS A CULT IDK WHAT YA WANT ME TO TELL YA

As an introvert who loves loves loves Suguru, don’t date him if you’re an introvert LMAO

He’s always got people in and around his house and all of them want to talk to him. It’s his “Family”

He may even be a little bit upset with you for wanting space from his family

They don’t mean you any harm, they love you! Why do you hate and avoid them?

I think he would “try” To “Help you adapt.”

By that I mean when you start to get overwhelmed, he pushes you past your boundaries to keep hanging out with them.

He would give you a drink to “help you nerves” 1000%

I just feel like being an introvert and dating him would leave you overstimulated all the time.

Not related (But it feels very related) he sees no problem in using the overhead lights and does so liberally. I mean that derogatorily.

Your best bet at getting some space is sneaking away while the others are deep in conversation

If you’re an introvert please stay far away from this man. I'm so serious. For your own safety stay clear

Now, that being said, I do think you can get some quiet time by agreeing to read with him.

But that’s it other than that you’re screwed.

Good luck soldier.

Kento Nanami

HIM TOO BESTIE HIM TOO

He completely understands because he is the exact same way

He's extremely sensitive to your needs and when you start to feel overwhelmed 

And as such, he's really good about getting you away from the situation and to a safe place where you can calm down

He understands space better than any of the other guys because he needs it sometimes too

You guys work because both of you hate everyone else

Ok, that's a bit of an exaggeration but there's truth to it!

One of his favorite fate nights is just sitting with you reading together 

Unlike Gojo, he doesn't see your signs of distress as cute. He sees them for what the are: signs if distress 

Thankfully, he's never opposed to leaving any social gathering early to get you home to recharge your battery

Honestly he probably needs a recharge too

And don't worry, he's not going to ask you to go anywhere else for at least a little while

Honestly, he's the objective best bet for any introvert

He's understanding and gentle about the situation 

All he asks is that you do the same for him

Ryomen Sukuna

Ok, here me out on this one. Sukuna loves that you're an introvert 

….because it means he has an easier time keeping you to himself 

What, you didn't think this would come without a catch, did ya?

I've touched on this before but I think Sukuna is really in touch with his SO’s needs, so he picks up on it the moment you start to get overwhelmed

And his version of helping you re-regulate is to just taking you home because he didn’t want to be round people anyway

Honestly, I feel like he may be an introvert too

But not in a “People can drain me” Sometimes way but in more of a “I fucking hate people” way

He’d make fun of you for it too just fyi

“What? Can’t handle a few humans? Pathetic.”

If someone comes looking for you to hang out he’s real quick to be like “Sorry, her battery is dead today.”

Even when it’s not

Does not understand personal time at all.

Ask him to leave you alone all you want, he’s going to be at least in the same room as you.

Probably pouting because you don’t want to be near him

Have I mentioned yet that Sukuna is a nightmare?

[sh4wty18]

HII! I was wondering if you could write a plus size fluff/angst fic for Johnnie. So basically y/n is really insecure about herself bc she’s plus sized and she degrades herself for it a lot behind closed doors. She believes that Johnnie would be much happier with someone else and one night she decides to break up with him for that reason. She really doesn’t want to do it but she feels it’s for the best. But Johnnie isn’t giving up so easily so he tries to convince her that size doesn’t matter to him and she’s beautiful no matter what. And could it have a happy ending? Sorry I’m not the best at explaining things

insecure.

pairing: johnnie guilbert x reader

summary: same as request.

cw: angst, fluff, language, discussion of body-related insecurities/fatphobia

word count: 1.1k + edited

---

Being plus-sized was already hard enough, but pair that with being in a public relationship with a celebrity, and your anxiety was constantly through the roof. It’s not that you don’t love being with Johnnie, because you do. You’re just afraid the feeling isn’t mutual. 

You’ve dealt with people being fatphobic toward you for as long as you can remember. But once you and Johnnie went public, it got a hundred times worse. You used to film with Johnnie, trying silly foods in his live streams and doing Q&As together. Eventually, the constant hate comments calling you names or telling Johnnie he could do better became too much. You stopped filming with him, stopped posting him on your socials, and told Johnnie to take down his posts with you as well. People assumed you’d broken up, but really you were just ultra-private.

You felt terrible. Forcing Johnnie to be in a private relationship just because of your body and insecurities wasn’t fair to him. But it also wasn’t fair for you to have to go through constant bullying and harassment online. He’d reassured you time and time again that he loves you, but it’s beginning to not be enough. You can’t help but ask yourself, would he be happier with someone skinnier? Would he be happier in a relationship where he didn’t have to hide who he was with? Probably, you conclude. 

These are the thoughts running through your mind on repeat as you doom-scroll on tiktok waiting for Johnnie to get back from filming with Jake and Carrington. You’ve been thinking about breaking up with him for weeks now, but every time you get close, the thought of losing him becomes unbearable and you stop yourself. Today, you decided, it was time. You couldn’t keep him chained to you, someone the world would always judge. You just want him to be happy, and you’re not convinced he can be truly happy with you. 

You jump slightly as Johnnie enters his bedroom, plopping down in bed next to you, bringing a hand to your cheek and guiding your face toward his mouth. “Hey baby,” he whispers as he trails kisses from your cheek to your lips. 

You pull away gently, “Hey.”

He senses that something is wrong– you’re never one to deny his kisses– and he sits up, leaning toward you. “What’s wrong?” 

“Johnnie, um, I don’t know how to say this…” You trail off, tears already welling in your eyes. 

He pulls you to his chest, enveloping your body in his arms, “Woah woah woah, what’s going on?” 

“Don’t do that, it’s only gonna make this harder,” You say between tears, pushing yourself away from him, even though you wanted nothing more than for him to cradle you, kiss your forehead, and whisper sweet nothings into your ear until you fall asleep. 

A nervous laugh escapes his lips, “Okay… now I’m really getting worried. What’s going on, y/n?” 

“Johnnie I… we can’t be together anymore,” You whisper, refusing to make eye contact with him.

You hear his breath catch, and he clears his throat, holding back tears, “Wait what? You… you’re breaking up with me? No. No no no-”

You cut him off, “Johnnie it’s for the best. I don’t want you to have to be stuck with me. You could have anyone you want and I’m… I’m not skinny like the other girls you’ve dated. I can post a picture on instagram and get hundreds of comments calling me every name in the book and questioning how you could ever date me. I made you delete all our posts and videos together for fuck’s sake! You don’t want this. It’s embarrassing. I’m embarrassing. I just want you to be able to date someone who you don’t have to hide.” You wince at the thought of him dating someone else, and turn away. 

He stares at you, mouth hanging slightly open at your words. Then he clenches his jaw and anger takes over. “No.” He says.

“Wh- what?” You ask, caught off guard.

“No! We’re not breaking up. Do you think I’m an idiot? I know you’re not as skinny as the other girls I’ve dated. I just don’t care. You think I give a fuck?” he scoffs and lets out a pissed-off laugh. “If I didn’t find you attractive, I wouldn’t be dating you, y/n. You’re not gonna sit there and tell me how I feel. I took down those posts because you asked me to… because I wanted you to be more comfortable… because at the end of the day, social media means nothing, and we don’t need to post together to be happy. I never wanted to hide you, and I have never, ever found you embarrassing. I’m offended you’d even suggest that.” 

You’re fully crying now, unable to stifle your quiet sobs. “I’m sorry,” You whisper, “I just thought-”

Johnnie’s face softens, “I know what you thought, baby. I understand. But I want you to know I think you’re the most beautiful girl in the world. There’s no one else I’d rather be with. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you. In my eyes, you’re perfect. I want the world to know you’re mine.” He pulls you closer to him again, taking you in his arms and pressing a long kiss to your lips. “I didn’t delete the posts, just archived them. Can I please, please reupload them? I don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks. I’ll block anyone who leaves hate comments, I’ll cuss out anyone who says something mean about you, I don't care. I’ll do whatever it takes to make you believe I want you.” 

You smile sheepishly, kissing him back, “I’m not sure if I’m ready for that quite yet. As for convincing me you want me… I think I have always known you love me, but my anxiety is constantly telling me it’s impossible. That someone like you could never love someone like me. I guess that’s something I have to work on. Your reassurance is helpful, but I don’t wanna be the girl who constantly needs words of affirmation to survive. I don’t wanna annoy you.”

He shakes his head, grasping your face in both hands so you have no choice but to make eye contact with him. “Listen to me,” He starts, “You aren’t annoying. I’ll reassure you until the day I die if that’s what it takes. I don’t care. All I care about is you understanding how much you mean to me. We’re gonna get through this together. And one day, when you’re ready, we can reupload everything. We’ll tell every single hater to fuck off and suck a dick. I’m not going anywhere. I love you, okay?”

“Okay,” You respond, and he pulls your face in to kiss you again.

---

this request was so cutie!! likes and reblogs are appreciated :)

[irritablepoe]

what do other people get wrong about poe?

YES MORE POE QUESTIONS!! :D thank you anon, you're really given me all the excuses to ramble lmao

tbh there are not many people on here that get him wrong, at least i haven't seen much? though ofc there are other websites *looks at tiktok with squinted eyes* that reduce him to being a sugar daddy boytoy, which... i mean it's funny. but it's also not everything that he is obviously, especially bc i don't think poe really has a concept of money tbh? like i think he has ridiculously expensive essential things (i say essential but i mean i don't think a mansion is particularly essential lmao) and he also buys things he considers important to show off his abilities, like for example the manuscript, but looking at the anthology (which isn't canon but lets pretend it is for a sec) he only has limited clothing and other than many other rich people would he doesn't just hire someone to get them for him yk? (he also lets mori pay i think right? lmao) in conclusion - he spends his money, yes, but he's not throwing it out the window (debatable tho, i'd call 20 mil a waste but he can do it ig?), nor does he spend it much on his own needs.

many people also forget that yes, he is whiny, but he is also extremely dangerous! his ability could trap nearly everyone and make them defenseless! even chuuya spends a while in poe's book and he's highly capable and intelligent! ranpo was near giving up! this is extremely important to his character and a severe bruise on his confidence! i think many forget that

he is a skilled snipper, can replace a car engine (bro watched one yt tutorial and rolled with it i'm so sure about this) and ofc he is a detective and a writer that impressed ranpo (and can also write a mystery in around 15-30 minutes) and is ALSO the architect for the guild. so. yeah. he's multi-talented as shit, i think people should appreciate that more

also (this list is never gonna end lol) i think people mistake his anxiety in social settings for being shy and i just.. don't think he is shy per se? he's quite boastful when it comes to his writing and his ability that comes with it and on the perfect crime trio case he had no problem at all speaking in public and even with the police. i mean an anxious person that would be worried about how he was perceived he would be worried that he'd be found out to be a criminal which he IS, but he just is so sure of himself that he's left no traces that he's just like "*shrug* yeah that happened, anyway, how are you officer? :D" not quite like that ofc but yk i just think he's more anxious in the way that he hates groups of people bc they overwhelm him quickly in regards to noise and conversation (especially small talk i'd guess) and that he just thinks many people he doesn't take interest in are annoying? that might be a lil controversial opinion tbh but i'll gladly remind you of this panel:

(i couldn't find the official translation help)

tho i also have to say that he calls himself shy here so could be both idk:

hm, yeah i think that's it for now. in relations to ranpo i don't like how people sugarcoat them a lot tbh, i know i've said it before but this really bugs me, like yes they're getting along quite well but i wouldn't call their relationship healthy at all? at least not yet, though i can see that it could work very well eventually. i think poe is doing all these things gladly for ranpo but ranpo has to open up way more and tell poe that he appreciates him, like please, this man is so down bad for you. also pls communicate so that poe doesn't lose himself in his obsession, this can't be healthy come onnn, bro has isolated himself for yearssss

yep, i think that's it, ty anon!!!! <33

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Tuesday Evening all :) Already at ep 3 of this season. Gonna blink and be done with this one ha This is a shorter season cause it was the year Covid really kicked in. Lots of goodies in this one though. Some good Tim analysis to be had and the next as well. Also a Lucy standing up for what’s right and not letting Tim sway her. All good things. Let’s get going.

3x03 La-Fiera

We start the ep with one of my fav non romantic pairings. Tim and Harper. Tim saying how he hates training with the public. Nyla not one to pass up giving him a hard time says ‘Sounds like performance anxiety.’ That there are pills for that now haha. I adore their ribbing each other so much. Comes from a place of genuine respect and liking one another. They’ve come so far I love it sfm.

They’re talking about who’s gonna take the crown at the range. It’s firearm re-qualification day. Now that Angela is a detective she no longer qualifies with patrol. Tim is convinced he will be next in line for the crown. Harper says that’s cute because she’s there LOL Also I am not hating him in that shirt...

Stanton makes a wager with Tim and Nyla. 20 bucks if their boot makes it out on top. Tim doesn't blink before agreeing. He knows Lucy’s top notch abilities. Would put his faith and life honestly in her hands any day. He does this on a daily basis anyways. Might as well make some money off it ha. Harper also agrees to the challenge. (Nyla literally set her twenty on fire betting on Nolan though LOL) Naturally Lucy comes out on top. Grey announces her as Mid-Wilshire's new champ.

Tim is so damn proud he’s beaming. He doesn’t even care that he didn’t win. (for the most part) Only that Lucy did. Also he looks so damn sure of himself when he hears the news. Look at him above. Not even a little surprised she took the top spot. Collects his winnings from Stanton and Nyla. Lucy is adorable with her reaction to winning the top spot. Feeling pretty good right now. The icing on the cake is Tim and Nyla tie for second place behind her. I love this so much.

Tamara comes to see Lucy at work asking for signature on the title of the car. Lucy disregards it at first in total mom mode. Asking why she hasn’t confirmed their appointment with the social worker yet? Tamara says she will be there she promises. Lucy gives in and signs the title. Tim comes up behind her all smiles as Tamara leaves. Asking how the puppy is? Lucy proudly says she’s doing really great. Then outright starts up a work flirt. By teasing him about the gun range.

He rolls his eyes even though we all know he loves it. He can act annoyed all he likes. We know he’s so very proud she won. Instead of saying that he tells her 'Get changed'. Her flirtatious ‘Yes sir.’ as she heads back with a smile. It’s like they don’t even care they’re unreservedly flirting at the front desk. For all to see. Not even trying to hide it anymore. Makes my heart happy.

We rejoin them in the shop. Lucy is gloating over her new title. Tim can’t let her know how proud he is so instead he deflects. Their competitiveness is one of my favorite things. It’s truly one of their love languages without them even realizing it is. His replies are him being such a sore loser it’s hilarious. He’s half proud but half irritated. Can't let her just think she's amazing. Has to make sure he's "grounding" her with some salty sass.

Their banter is the bedrock of their relationship and moments like this only prove that. Lucy talking to him like no one else ever has or ever will. Tim only lets her talk to him this way. Calling him out for being salty and giving him crap for losing. Then asking for half the money he won off her haha Seems only fair to me. I love them so much. I always enjoy fun playful scenes like this from them. The way she says ‘Wow’ at the end I’m dying. Of course Tim is going to take this moment to puff up his training of her instead of praising her haha Can’t just say he is proud of her nope has to be a salty sore loser instead. God forbid she know he's proud. What a tragedy that would be Timothy.

Before their banter can go any further Tim spots her old car. Looks like someone trying to steal it. They pull over and question the guy immediately. He says he just bought it. Lucy is incensed and stomps over to him. Saying what do you mean just bought it? He tells her he bought it for 4K. Making Lucy even angrier. Not only was her car sold but under its value. (according to her) Tim is enjoying himself a little too much about this. Look at his face during that interaction. He is legit giddy at how upset she is Tamara sold the car.

They apologize and hand him back the title. He continues to struggle with the door. Lucy tells him how he’s supposed to open it and it pops open. He says 'Thanks.' Tim gives the most sarcastic thumbs up ever. I’m laughing so hard. He is enjoying her puppy rebelling already and so quickly after she signed over the title. It’s written all over his body language the entire scene. Such a turd. A hot one but one none the less. Getting a damn kick out of this whole thing. Idk how he can make being a jerk so hot but he does. Well done Eric. Don't ever stop.

We catch them next outside their shop waiting to meet up with Tamara. First off why is Tim so sinfully delicious when he’s leaning against vehicles? What is that? Then he comes to full height like the tall drink of water he is. Phew. Love to climb that man like a tree…*ahem* but I digress.. Tim continues the sass by starting off the scene by saying ‘Bad puppy.’ Why is this also so sexy? He is enjoying himself far too much and not hiding it. Giddy really.

Lucy sees she has new clothes on and is enraged. Opening the convo with ‘You sold my car to buy new clothes?’ Tim can't help himself and adds in ‘And earrings.’ Tamara says it was her car to sell. Lucy is so upset. Going on to say it was to sleep in not to sell. Tamara makes a solid point about going to school with dirty clothes and greasy hair.

Goes on to say 'So yeah she sold it to buy some nice things.' Telling Lucy she just wanted to feel normal for once. Tim steps in and asks where the rest of the money is? She replies that it’s in her college fund. Lucy is still mad. (Hell I would be too) She asks her why she didn’t just say something this morning? That she clearly had a buyer in mind already.

Tamara bites back she would’ve just said no. I mean she’s not wrong. She starts to walk away and Lucy isn’t done yet. Asking were she is staying? Tamara only replies her cousin and doesn’t answer Lucy’s follow up if it’s safe. Tim could not be more smug if he tried. Look at that man. He is basking in how right he was about the consequences of her taking on a puppy. Lucy is so very stressed and panicking about all this. Polar opposites above. Smug Vs Stress.

What I love about this is he isn’t yelling at her, or telling her she was wrong. Just enjoying the moment doing it for him. Crazy as it sounds that is growth for him. Just tells her it’s time to get back to work when a call comes in. Not much else to be done here. Lucy continues to watch Tamara walk away. Sighs and joins him back in the shop.

Tim and Lucy roll up to a hot mess of a situation. They're both getting a real look at the disaster zone that is Doug Stanton. He has Mis-identified a suspect they’re looking for cause well its Stanton. Poor Jackson could not look more stressed. The whole thing is so uncomfortable to watch go down. Makes my anxiety go through the roof seeing how he terrorizes this family.

To see first hand how blatantly racist he’s being. It’s hard to stomach. I just want to clock him. Tim does his best to contain the situation. Pulling Doug aside to cool him down. Telling him their suspect was already caught. This was a bad call and the absolute wrong guy. Tim calls off backup afterwards telling Jackson to let the poor traumatized kid go. With his apologies and a card. That if they want to complain on Stanton they’re well within their right to. (Should sue his ass as much as possible)

We return to them at a college campus. They are there to protect La-Fiera and her son against a credible threat. Someone is there to kill her and Diego her son on their tour. Stanton makes a terrible comment about taking an early lunch. Letting nature take its course instead. Lucy comments on this later when it’s just her and Tim. She is so angry and incensed at this point. She expects Tim to agree with her or at least have a comment of some sort. He doesn’t....

Tim tries to agree without really agreeing with Lucy in his reply above. She doesn’t let it stand nor should she. Lucy is not one to shy away from speaking her mind with Tim. Especially when it comes to something moral like this. Telling Tim he terrorized that family. (He very much did it was awful.)

Then he comes at it again with a complicit non committal answer below once again. Trying to excuse Stanton's behavior by saying it’s cause he’s rough around the edges. Oh Timothy no….there’s a quote by Ella Wheeler Wilcox. I only know this because it comes from one of my all time fav Castle episodes ‘47 seconds’ ‘To sin by silence when we should protest, makes cowards of men.’

By saying he’s rough around the edges is making Tim complicit in his behavior. Thus sinning by silence. Making excuses for his behavior by saying 'It's just the way he is.' 'Nothing to be changed about him.' 'He is who he is.' Lucy doesn’t waste a second before calling him out on it. Proud of my girl. You know I love Tim but he needed to hear this. He was wrong in how he was approaching this.

No one better to call him on it than her. The way she does it is so good too. Straight up saying he’s a racist and Tim saying we can’t know that…but we do my love. She sticks the landing with finishing off with ‘Let’s just make excuses for him....’ Tim is struck by her words below and has no comeback.

Now this next section below isn’t me agreeing with Tim. It’s me analyzing why he is replying the way he is. He does grow from this story arc which I do love so very much. Not just this one but even more so next ep. So to start we have to remember the generation he was taught by and the father he had growing up. You truly are a product of your environment. Your attitude and and POV on life stem from it. Whether you like that or not. Now it’s you who chooses to break the cycle of it 100%. Also by surrounding yourself with better more positive people. i.e. Lucy Chen for him.

I mentioned last ep Tim is the kind to put his head down and grind. That’s how he survived his childhood with an abusive father. Both emotionally and physically. How he survived his time in the service and his own training as a rookie. To him if he can just hunker down and survive it he can make it past it. I think we all have things (if you don’t you’re a lucky human and were blessed with wonderful parents I envy you truly) our parents did or said that didn’t sit right with us as kids. You weren’t sure why but you knew it wasn’t ok. Things that left their mark. That we end up carrying with us into adulthood unconsciously.

I know my parents had quite the list. Things that as I got older and I would repeat or came out involuntarily, either I realized it or those around me did and would let me know. Even though as an adult I fought against it would slip out even if I didn't mean how it came off. Certain thoughts or actions come out and you realize that’s coming from your childhood. Things still come out of us involuntarily and you catch it. Tim sadly doesn't catch it till Lucy calls him on it. I think Tim was taught by ‘rough around the edges’ types and his father most definitely was that before his time as a cop. Before Lucy Tim was most definitely stuck in his ways.

To Tim it was something you just dealt with and moved on from. You weren’t gonna change them so it was best to just get by. Is that the best attitude to have? No but it’s how he got by. Hence his advice to Jackson in 3x02 because that’s his default gear. From his survival mode from childhood and from his own training experiences. His reply is an outdated one. I don’t even think he knows its coming off the way it is. It’s a reflection of his environment and past experiences on how he was taught to deal with cops like that. Once again not excusing Tim but understanding why he is replying this way.

Now Lucy smacks some sense into him basically saying just because that’s how it was or currently is doesn’t make it right. She’s making Tim face being complicit in excusing Stanton's behavior by saying as such. Won’t let him get away with it. Tim is flat out wrong and no one better to let him know that than Lucy. He's learned from her just because that's the way it is doesn't mean that's the way it should be. i.e. this moment.

The ripple effect of her words reflect in this next scene. Jackson is in Grey’s office telling him about Stanton. He isn't winning Wade over until Tim steps up. Tells Grey that whatever Jackson is telling him he stands with him. Which is huge. I think Lucy made an impact on him. Changes how he was viewing this situation. Now Tim is his own person and doesn’t get swayed easily. But Lucy has massive sway with him. Opened his eyes to this and gave him a different POV on it. Seeing he needed to intervene and not stand on the sidelines anymore. That it was just as egregious to do nothing.

I love the scene when they emerge from Grey’s office. Jackson puts Tim in his place about being complicit about Stanton. Of cops like him in general. That by doing that Tim had given permission to those kinds of cop to continue to operate that way. Once again wishing Titus and Eric had gotten more scenes together. This one is *chef kiss* Tim is very resigned by Jackson’s chewing him out. He knows he was so very wrong in his thinking and agree’s with Jackson on it.

There is no fight in him to defend himself. He knows he wasn't on the right side of this at this point. Tim has been humbled today by all this. He got taken to school by both Lucy and Jackson. He leaves Tim standing there wishing there was more he could do. He got it from both barrels today. Smacking some much needed perspective into his world. Truth hurts but it’s how we learn and grow from it that matters. We see some massive growth next ep for our boy with this.

Tamara comes to see Lucy at the station to apologize. I love love love this scene. Their bond continues to grow in this ending scene. Lucy saying the bit about trust being earned. Tim has rubbed off positively on her as well. She uses that in this situation with Tamara. Asking what she can do to earn that trust?

Tamara shows her the laptop she bought. That her cousin's is safe adjacent but not for her laptop. Lucy is wonderful and says she can keep it here. To check it out every morning so it stays safe. Lucy tells her about the campus she was on today. How Tamara should check it out. She laughs say she can’t go there. Lucy is her sunshine self says there are scholarships. She can help her apply to them.

I know Tim likes to give her a hard time about Tamara and being her puppy, but I think he truly knows the positive impact she will have on her. We’ll get to see that as their relationship grows. I love watching their bond develop. Truly enjoy them so much.

~~~~

That’s it’s for this one. S3 may be short but it’s packed with a lot of content and goodies. No side notes for this one all pretty intertwined.

Thank you to everyone who continually supports these reviews it means so much to me. The likes/comments and reblogs make my soul happy haha shall see you all in 3x04 :)

[sunnylands-world]

could you do a fic where the reader goes to one of Aidan's events with him and she's really socially anxious so he stays close to her and there's so many people talking to/taking pictures of Aidan and she experiences some sensory overload and Aidan can tell she's upset and later he apologizes for the amount of people there and they cuddle? you don't have to if you don't want to, thanks!

Twisted fingers

Pairing: Aidan Gallagher x fem reader

Summary: you attempt to go with Aidan to his event only to see that the light of fame isn't for you at all…

Word count: 1'310

Warning: panic attack, social anxiety, paparazzi are assholes

Universe: famous boyfriend?

A/n: I'm honestly so glad to see a request for Aidan. He deserves more love and less hate. He's an amazing actor and he does great as five Hargreeves in tua. So thank you for the request. I hope you like it, I mixed up what you asked for a bit though I'll be honest. ♡

He knew how bad this was. He'd never put you in a position like this but you wanted to be supportive. All the other celebrities' girlfriends we're and so you went. See Aidan's career had its ups and downs like all of them and unfortunately that meant hate and love.

He'd been called scary looking and told he couldn't sing so your support was everything to him even if he wouldn't say it. you came first, that's just how Aidan was as a boyfriend. You could feel your heart locked in your chest and you tried to ignore it.

"You don't have to do this. I won't be upset I promise," Aidan announced from behind you, leaned against the wall as they sized you up for the dress to match his look. You fixed a hopefully convincing smile on your face.

"I'm going Aidan you're always supporting me and I should do the same. plus my therapist says to try and do these things so I can break out of this fear." You inhaled as your voice quivered. Aidan moved from the wall taking steps towards you and you eyed him in the mirror. His green eyes seemed to be a tad bit lighter, they always were when he was around you. That made your heart swell seeing the little things change about him when he was around. "You're the best" he sighed "but just so you know I'm not gonna be upset if you can't take it. I'll be proud of you, remember that. Don't be afraid to come find me if we aren't close and it gets too much. I'll come to you," He promised, wrapping his arms around your waist as he looked at your reflection.

"Mr. Gallagher I know you love your girlfriend but I can't do my job with you trying to touch her right now," the stylist stated slightly glaring. Your cheeks blushed a bit as he released you moving back.

"I'll see you at the car" he called, pulling the door open to leave. You nodded before looking back at yourself.

“I just hope I'll be able to do this, no I can do this!”

𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌𖠌

The car ride consistencted of a hand on your thigh rubbing reassuringly across your dress that matched Aidan's black suit with the white undershirt. your look was more white than his but the stylist thought you should be wearing more white than black. The car came to a stop where the other cast members were arriving. You hesitated on the door handle looking at everyone outside, Aidan noticed locking your fingers with a squeeze to your hand.

"Hey can you take her-" he started only for you to interrupt.

"No!" The driver and Aidan looked at you.

"Baby if you want to go I understand it's fine,-"he begins

"No! It's not. I can't just keep turning around and running, I have to try at some point." you opened the door, stepping out before he could say anything facing towards the crowd and you begin to regret getting out without him…

The lights flashed blinding anything in your sight and they just kept coming before being followed up with questions. You pulled your hand up covering your face. You weren't sure how they did it [celebrities] with all these questions. who did you answer? How were they cool as cucumbers with so much flashing in their direction? Aidan made his way around the car wrapping his hand around you. He moved forward walking past all the paparazzi ignoring their questions with polite smiles and you tried to keep up in the uncomfortable heels you were wearing.

He makes his way to the carpet seeing the others. He smiled and hugged his friends and talked with them a bit. You could swear you were sweating on your dress and your heart only shook worse in it's cage as you thought about every little thing that could go wrong.

Did I put on enough deodorant?

Can they see the sweat on this black silk?

Before you knew it Aidan had been pulled away.

He gave you an apologetic look and you mouthed for him to go. It was his event of course he couldn't be by your side forever right? You tried to not look like you were bothered by the people around you, moving about and you hoped you looked normal.

Do I look normal?

Are people watching me and think I'm weird and stand out?

You were never big on smiling with teeth, you hadn't quite practiced enough for you to like it even though Aidan said you looked beautiful when you didn't try to hide your teeth when giggling or smiling. He always said you were beautiful.

"[Name] are you the reason Aidan and his ex broke up?"

"Did he cheat with you?"

"Are you the one who Forged into their love life like an obsessed fangirl after Aidan?"

"no it-it wasn't like that!" You snapped. For some reason when things affected you, you felt the need to rush and explain. Like your sentences were on a timer and if you didn't say what you had to you never would be able to. The problem was your voice seemed to fade in and out.

A Radio with a bad connection pissing off the listener, only now your voice was the radio and you were the listener. If that wasn't enough your skin trailed with goosebumps and shivered like it was cold out. Your breathing seemed to struggle almost as though it was blocked like water on a river stopped by Branches.

You tried to focus on it and tell yourself you needed to breathe but then you focused too much. You could feel the slow flow of air through your chest and the soft pressure on your lip as it released before all of sudden you didn't have enough air.

Submerged under water about to suffocate you begin to suck in the air in panic. Your eyes were wide in fear. Not only were you on the red carpet but the pictures continued. The flashing seemed to enhance the need to breathe but you had lost your balance when a hand, one that was familiar, caught you. You looked up seeing his Forest green eyes.

"That's it, just focus on me. look at me," Aidan said, shielding you from the greedy eyes of the paparazzi looking for a story.

He rested his hand on your knee giving you an encouraging look.

"You know what to do. Bring your knees to your chest and rest your Head against them." Doing as told Aidan gave you praises as he rubbed a hand on your back. Your breathing began to regulate and you shut your eyes, sighing.

"Aidan?" You called

"Yes?

"I wanna go home," you said, still not meeting his gaze.

He tilted your head up by the chin and a warm smile awaited you.

"Take my hand?" He says holding his hand out for you. You nod nervously standing.

"I'm so proud of you" he announced getting into the car. You look over puzzled but say thank you anyway cause the brunette to let out a laugh.

He pulls you closer wrapping an arm around so you're snuggled into his side as he kisses your forehead, then looks forward.

"I'm sorry about all of that," he inhales, letting out a very much weighted exhale.

"The parazzi are…" he trailed off trying to find the word

"Assholes?" You giggled.

"Yes," he laughs, squeezing you tighter.

"The pictures will be everywhere," you sigh, leaning in closer for some reason hoping this will erase the worries of tomorrow.

"I'll handle that" he promised and Aidan never broke his promises to you unless he had no choice, and sure enough when you got home Aidan made a phone call and you never saw an article about it anywhere.

[gardensgatekeeper]

'Tis the Damn Season - Part 2

Pairing: Danny Wagner x Reader

Word Count: 2,078

Warnings: Fluff, angst, sadness, more fluff. As always, let me know if I missed any!

Broke my own heart writing this one :')

If you haven’t already, read part one

Bored was an understatement as you found yourself picking at your sweater while half listening to your family drag on about all the latest small-town gossip, the sole reason you left in the first place. You eventually wandered into the kitchen to get a refill of whatever would shut your brain off for at least five minutes. The holidays seemed to linger like bad perfume, and truthfully you wanted nothing more than to just pack up and drive back to the city but you know you’d never hear the end of it from your mom. And as much as you were highly considering bailing on Danny, something in your brain was screaming at you to hear him out.

You practically gulped down a glass of wine before beginning to refill the glass as your mom walked in. She sat her glass down beside yours, “Pour me one while you’re at it.” The two of you stood in silence as you sipped your drinks until you spoke up. “I saw Danny while I was out today.” You quietly said, as if trying not to let anyone else hear. Her eyes perked up as she turned towards you, waiting to hear the details of your encounter. “Oh?”

Though your mom could be a little perfunctory at times, she really was there for you when things were tough, especially the day Danny called things off. You recall the memory of you coming home with tears streaming down your face. She held you on the couch all night long, gently rocking you in her arms while whispering words of comfort until you eventually fell asleep. 

“He wants to talk.” You muttered out, your voice full of dread and anxiety. “Well, honey. I know you two didn’t end things on good terms but maybe it’ll be good for you. For both of you. You’re both adults now, you shouldn't keep holding onto the past.

You hated how much she was right but simply nodded in agreement. “Just don’t go in with any expectations. Be open minded and mind your tongue before you start jumping in with blame.”

You took a long sip of your wine before replying. “I know. But you know how hard I worked to put all this behind me, I’m worried about messing all that up.” She placed her hand over yours, gently rubbing it and offering a warm smile. “I know Y/N. But I also know that you’ve got a brain up there that will tell you exactly what to do. You’ve got this.”

Well shit, didn’t expect to start crying just yet.

“Thanks mom. I think I’m gonna go lay down for a bit. If I have to hear Grandma Jean talk about ‘this damn inflation’ one more time, I might actually go crazy.” She chuckled in response as you both exited the kitchen and parted ways. Crawling into your bed, you continued sipping your wine as you aimlessly scrolled social media. Your heart panged a bit as you saw your friends had taken a weekend trip to the mountains. Something you had been suggesting to them for weeks. So much for that.

Setting your phone on the nightstand, you chugged the rest of the liquid in your glass before grabbing a blanket and closing your eyes, letting sleep consume you, even if for just a few minutes.

---

Clink!

The sound woke you from your slumber. Confused, you rubbed the sleep from your eyes as you took in the now dark room. How long did you sleep for? You grabbed your phone and was slightly blinded by the brightness but managed to distinguish the time, 11:13pm.

Clink!

The same sound snapped you out of your thoughts as you turned to look for the source of the noise. It wasn’t until the third time that you realized it was coming from your window. Cautiously, you walked over and gasped at the sight.

There, Danny stood with several small rocks in his hands. You quickly opened the window and stuck your head out, the brisk air fully waking you up.

“Danny, what the hell are you doing?” You quietly yelled out. “Sorry, I figured you’d probably changed your number when you moved. Wasn’t sure how else to contact you.” He replied honestly, wiping his hands on his jeans after dropping the rest of the rocks back to the ground. You shook your head at his stubborn determination, something that used to drive you crazy. “Plus, if I remember correctly, you agreed.”

You were then met with his outstretched arm as both of you knew you’d need his help to climb out of the window that was just a touch too high off the ground. “C’mon, just like old times.” His smirk held the memories of the countless times he’d helped you sneak out of the house to go on these late night drives, something the both of you quickly made a habit of.

It had been years since you’d crawled through this window, yet you still found yourself doing the same maneuvers to twist your body through the opening. His hands quickly found their way to your hips, gently squeezing as he helped you down. When your feet finally touched the ground below, his hands didn’t leave your hips. You two locked eyes for a moment until he realized what he was doing, clearing his throat. “Sorry. Uh, shall we go?” You nodded as he led the way to his truck parked on the street in front of your house.

“Still driving that old thing?” You fake insulted, though mostly surprised that it was still running. “Gets me where I need to go. No need to get a new one when there’s nothing wrong with this one.” He grinned, giving an encouraging pat to the hood of the truck.

Like old times, he opened the passenger door for you and you muttered out a quiet thank you. You felt like you were transported back in time. Apart from the more worn leather seats, the interior of his truck looked virtually unchanged; the same beaded necklace still hung from his rear view mirror, but what surprised you the most was the little drummer rubber duck still perched up on the driver’s side dashboard. One of your nephews had given you the small toy years ago at their birthday party and naturally you gave it to Danny. You couldn’t believe he had kept it there after all these years.

Danny slid in the driver’s seat and cranked the truck to life before slowly pulling out of your neighborhood. For a while, the only sound was that from the radio, a familiar tune filling the slightly awkward silence. That was, until Danny spoke up again.

“So, how have things been? Big city girl now, huh?” He suddenly broke the silence. “Yeah uh, kind of a haste decision but I love it.” You replied. He took a deep breath before speaking again. “Was it because of me?”

“Danny, are we really gonna do this?” You sighed out, already starting to feel the rush of emotions come flooding back.

“Yes, Y/N. We are gonna do this. Because I fucked up, okay? I’m sor-.” Despite your mom’s words from earlier playing in your ear, you couldn't help the word vomit coming up.

“Are you though? Are you really Danny? Or are you just saying that? Because you weren’t there. You went away to college while I was left to pick up all the pieces. You have no idea the shit I went through because you decided to just give up on us.” The tears had long started falling down your face as you barely choked out the last few words.

He was silent, accepting your words as he knew you were right. ‘Danny you really hurt me. I couldn't escape it. Everything reminded me of you and it fucking hurt. Do you know how hard it was having everyone look at me like I was some pathetic little lost dog. You never even reached out.” You whispered, wiping the tears from your eyes.

He suddenly pulled off the road into a field that lined the backroads the two of you were traveling down. As he put the truck in park, he turned towards you before replying.

“Y/N I know and I swear to god if I could go back in time and change it, I would. I was so fucking stupid for ever letting you go. But by the time I realized it, it was too late and I was scared. Scared that you had moved on and found someone new. Scared that you wouldn’t feel the same way anymore. Scared that I had really lost you forever and that there was nothing I could do to fix it. Please believe me.” He reached his hand over to grab yours that rested in your lap.

“I love you so much Y/N. I never stopped loving you.” He spoke. You couldn't help the tears as they started flowing again, much harder than before. Danny suddenly released your hand, quickly exiting the truck and you watched in confusion as he walked over to your side, throwing the door open. He reached over your lap, unbuckling your seatbelt before gently guiding you out of the vehicle. He simply engulfed you in a hug and just held you as you continued to cry out. “I’m so sorry baby.” you could hear the sniffle in his own voice as the two of you just stood there embracing one another while the stars twinkled above.

A couple minutes later, you spoke up again. “I often wonder what my life would be like if things would have worked out. I wouldn’t be living in a city with my so-called friends. I’m pretty sure they don’t even like me. None of them can tell which smiles I’m faking like you could.” You replied honestly.

“You know. The only reason I ever come back here is because of you. I’m always hoping that one day you’ll be here. Looks like I finally got my wish.” He answered, slightly pulling back to look at you. Slowly at first to make sure it was okay, he began gently kissing away each individual tear that had fallen from your eyes, getting dangerously closer to your lips with every peck.

“Danny-” You whispered out. He pulled back once more, looking between your eyes once more for any sign to stop, but there was none. Leaning back in, he pressed a soft kiss to your lips. Though gentle at first, it quickly evolved into one with so much more passion and hunger, as if trying to make up for lost time. Trying to heal all the damage and hurt that he had caused. Despite not having done this in years, the two of you found your rhythm just like that. Like nothing had changed.

Before things could get too heated, he pulled back again. Confusion shot across your face as you immediately began to feel regret. But just as quickly, he sensed it and reassured you. “I don’t want to push things. I just got you back and I don’t want to lose you again. Not this time Y/N. Let’s just take it slow.” You were a little disappointed because his lips felt so perfect against yours but Danny was right.

He released your hand and grabbed the blanket you briefly remembered seeing folded up in the back before walking around to the back of the truck to open the tailgate. Nodding his head towards the bed of the truck, he held his hand out for yours. “C’mon, let's just watch the stars. I remember you used to love that.” You smiled as his hands found your hips once again to help you up before joining you.

There, the two of you sat together on the blanket, holding each other incredibly close like your lives depended on it. It wasn’t long before your eyes started feeling heavy and a yawn escaped your lips. Danny shifted a bit so you could lay more comfortably against his warm chest as he kept one arm around you while the other drew gentle patterns on your legs. The soft beat of his heart lulled your mind into a deep state of relaxation. Just before sleep consumed you, you felt him kiss the top of your head and could have sworn you heard him speak softly. “Still so perfect.”

✶ ✶ ✶

Taglist:

@jannysarcher @gretnavannfleet @bimbokiszka

[psychologeek]

So, I noticed something interesting:

I was asking people to come up with a name for "a program that specialises in therapy for criminals/villains/ anyone with legal problems. I have TBL (Therapy Beyond Law) but it feels lame".

And an interesting thing I found was that even though I didn't say anything about the program... Un village them.

Some of the offers included:

"Revive - Rehabilitating Every Villian Into Viable Employees"

LAW (Legal Aid for Wretches)/( Legal Aid for Workers)

Villain Anonymous

league of Super Enemy’s rehabilitated (LOSER)?

(I also got some interesting ideas! But that was a common thought)

Which is... weird. It could be on me, since I made it sound like it's a "villains' fix-it" , but my thoughts were based on some things:

Therapists have ethical codes, and in many places laws about having to report to the authorities. (Like if someone tell them they're gonna kill someone and have a plan, cases of child abuse, etc.)

What do criminals that require mental support do?

The mental equivalent of a "back alley doctor".

Like, this made up program is supposed to be where ppl who can't/doesn't want to go to therapy at someone with ethical/legal code can find help via this.

It's all distant-locarion based, like phone and Skype and Zoom, only their own kind. For security reasons. And it's firewalls all the ways down with the best hackers on the job and maybe some magic users and a cyborg?

Anyway -

It can doesn't have to be about crimes.

Honestly, most people come to talk about "normal" things, like depression and stress and relationships and all.

There are those who come because they don't want to be known by the government, bc of paranoia or witness protection or family or social issues.

There are metas, or magic users, or aliens - coming looking for a place to openly talk without the fear of being exposed or reported.

So you have a big ass, 7 feet green person talking about their body image issues and being rejected by society and everyone look at you with disgust and hating you because of your skin colour.

And you have an alien talking about cultural conflicts and physical differences and feeling isolated and alone. Or being turned between the people who raised you (that you love) but you want to know more about your birth family and don't want to upset them.

And a witch coming to tslk about how to come out to her mother - there's a lot of love there, but also a traditional family. And she laughs and telling you she doesn't know what would be harder for her mom - finding out her kid's a witch or finding out she's bi.

And of course, there are criminals. But most of them come for things like "How to improve my relationship with my kids" or getting help for depression or anxiety.

(sometimes they talk about crimes. But it's usually like "I have panic attacks since my car blew up. Why? Oh, bc I killed that monster's brother. Anyway, how can I go back to driving?" )

And there are, very few, like trafficers coming for things like "how to make the cargo last longer" and "sometimes they cry and it piss me off".

(which is... not something a usual supervisor can help you deal with.)

And sometimes they come bc more than one reason - bc a 7feet green person CAN'T find a "legal" job, so they also talk about hurting ppl.

And that alien might have a blue-and-orange morral, and is horrified by the whole concept of "burial", but also can't understand WHY he can't shape shift and look like someone else (exist) and the concept of identity theft.

Anyway. I'd love to hear your ideas/fics. Just please let me know if you write anything with this concept. Thank you 😊

[northstories]

Chaos Controlled:

For all my fics find me on Archive of Our Own

Twt: @ northsstories (no minors)

My message inbox is always open for drabble requests bc I love chaos 🤟

🐿️Jilix 🐥

Reverent

Rated: E

One-shot University AU

Jisung thinks Felix is very, very pretty and can't stop looking at him. Felix might be into that.

Words: 16,713

Completed: ✅

Naturally

Rated: E

Multi Chapter Canon Compliant

They're in love your honor, they're just being idiots about it

Words: 32,692

Completed: ✅

Status Quo

Rated: T

Social Media University AU

Jisung is truly hopeless, hope you're into that

(because Felix sure is)

Completed: ❌

Praying At Your Altar

(if you know what I mean)

Rated: E

Sweet, Christian, innocent Jisung vs. filthy minded Felix hunting him like prey

Part 1 of Be Gay - Do Crimes (works as standalone)

Words: 17,579

Completed: ✅

I Dare You (To Be Mine)

Rated: E

University AU

Jilix vs. Alcohol and Party Games, this can only go well, right? Right?

Words: 32,805

Completed: ✅

🐰Minchan🐺

Cheesy

Rated: E

University AU: Bang Chan using the cheesiest lines to whittle away at Minho's sanity and resolve. We all know Chan is a total dad, he deserves a proper dad-joke fic.

Words: 37,826

Completed: ✅

Little Birdie Flies So Far

Rated: E

Dead dove: do not eat. Victorian era, Murder mansion, serial killers AU.

The manor stands proudly within the vast expanse of its estates. Well-kept gardens, neatly kept grounds, lavish furnishings, exquisite architecture. The gem of the town.

But behind its walls, an evil lurks. Invisible to the eyes of the people, hidden away.

Completed: ❌

🐺Chanlix🐥

Freesia

Rated: M

Police AU, Hybrid AU

Chan is a detective with an impossible case. In a desperate attempt to crack it, he ends up taking in the hybrid Felix in the hopes that he can provide any leads.

Part 1 of The Language of Flowers

Words: 49, 204

Completed: ✅

🐰Minsung🐿️

Dandelions

Rated: E

Set in Freesia Universe

Minho is a cop and a control freak

Jisung is a hermit producer with anxiety

Part 2 of The Language of Flowers

Completed: ❌

blushes, butterflies and heart flutters and shit...

Rated: T

One-shot University AU

Just dumb best friends doing best friend stuff... Platonically, I think?

Words: 14, 076

Completed: ✅

🦊Jeongsung🐿️

Sweet & Spicy

Rated: E

Omegaverse AU, Strangers to Lovers

Jeongin is generally good at minding his own business. But when he sees a scared omega pushed up against the wall of a nightclub, facing three looming alphas, his moral compass decides that he should do something. The problem is that said omega turns out be the cutest fucking thing Jeongin has ever seen in his life. Even if he is drunk off his ass.

Words: 42,983

Completed: ✅

It's Only Fair

Rated: E

University AU, Practice fic.

POV: You hate the education program you're in, but your parents pressured you to apply for it when all you wanna do is skateboard. Then, when you get in, you get stuck with a hardass prof who makes you do stupid weekly tests, meaning you actually have to read the course material. This one nerd in your class is always sitting alone so he should be fairly easy to manipulate into helping you though. What you didn't account for was the fact that he wants to do a knowledge for knowledge kinda deal.

Yeah, Jeongin is fucked.

Completed: ❌

🦊JeongSungLix🐿️🐥

Domming 101

Domming 102

Rated: E

Canon compliant. M/M/M. Polyamory. Practice fic.

Words: 21,725 + 9,091

Completed: ✅

🦊JeongLix🐥

Tell Me I'm Pretty (Sweet Words On Your Tongue)

Rated: E

Canon Compliant, first times, queer platonic relationship.

“Step out! Hello, we are Stay Kids, and we are here today with Teen Vogue! And today we're gonna try out the Compliment Battle.” This is Jeongin's worst nightmare.

Words: 9,401

Completed: ✅

🐰Minhyang 🦊

Moved By You

Rated: E

Alternate Universe - Non-Famous.

Jeongin is shy and clumsy — this he knows. Which begs the question; Why the heck does he think signing up for a dance class is a good idea? Well, aside from the fact that Hyunjin's gorgeous dance teacher Minho said he should. And the fact that he's drunk off his ass while staring at the sign-up sheet. Perhaps he should? Hell, he can do this, right? He can impress Minho. Right?

Words: 14,587

Completed: ✅

🐺 Chansung🐿️

Under Your Skin

Rated: E

Alternate Universe - Non-Famous. Childhood friends to lovers.

Jisung lets himself be touched. Kissed. Girls, guys, doesn’t matter. He feels like he knows everything about the world. It doesn’t mean shit. Because they’re not him. They’re not Bang Chan. How pathetic, to fall in love after a single smile. Jisung doesn’t even try to get over it.

Words: 34,284

Completed: ✅

🐶 Seungyang🦊

Et Ensomt Tjern (A Lonely Pond)

Rated: E

Viking AU. Mythical Beings & Creatures. Norwegian Mythology & Folklore.

Seungmin has never held much stock in wanderer’s tales or myths, but when he constantly finds himself feeling watched after moving to a cottage in the deep forest, it’s hard not to at least consider it. Especially when he swears he keeps seeing the shadowed silhouette of what looks like a man with a fox tail swinging behind him.

Perhaps he's just gone mad?

Completed: ❌

🐶Seungsung🐿️

Objectively, Of Course.

with @anautumncarol

Rated: T

Alternate Universe - Non-Famous. Strangers to lovers.

In which Seungmin is willing to admit that his dorm-mate isn't super bad-looking, and not not kinda cute, even if he is annoying as hell. Objectively, of course, because Seungmin is nothing if not a level-headed scholar.

Words: 7,851

Completed: ✅

🐷🐰 3RACHA 🐺🐿️

What Makes It So Special

Rated: E

Inspired by art.

Canon Compliant. Established poly relationship.

Jisung is staring. These late night working sessions are prone to get the best of him. It's late, he hasn't slept for a while, hasn't left this room in hours, it's hot… Hot enough that Chan at one point forgoes his shirt. Hot enough that Changbin's thigh feels like a space heater pressed against Jisung’s own where they're slumped on Chan’s bed, leaning against the headboard. He doesn't stand a chance, really.

Words: 7,043

Completed: ✅

Between Us

Rated: E

Alternate Universe - Non-Famous. Hybrids. Omegaverse.

Chan's tail keeps wagging and wagging, looking at Jisung with wide, astonished eyes. Changbin nudges him with his elbow. "Dude, control that thing, would you?" "I dunno what’s happening." "Hi Bin! So, this is the boyfriend Chan, huh?"

Words: 18,618

Completed: ✅

🐶🐰 2minjeongchan 🦊🐺

Right Under My Nose

with @amiandthechaos. Inspired by art.

Rated: E

Alternate Universe - Non-Famous. Hybrids. Omegaverse.

Dog-hybrids are weird, Minho has always thought so, but somehow he has ended up living with three of them. Three omegas to boot. Maybe it's because he's a cat-hybrid himself that he doesn’t really get their deal; The tail-wagging, and the sniffing, and the sleeping in a big pile, but he’s somehow made his peace with it. That is until all three of them collectively decide to start sniffing him, like he is the most interesting thing on the planet despite the fact that he is most likely just an unpresented beta.

Words: 34,103

Completed: ✅

🐺🐰🐷🐰🥟 Drabbles 🐿️🐥🐶🦊

Six Minutes 'till Midnight

🐿️/

Rated: T

Canon compliant, fluff, birthday traditions, soulmate au

Words: 1,153

Would You Be So Kind, As To Fall In Love With Me?

🐰/🐺

There's something so oddly juxtaposing about Minho patting his head, Chan thinks. Minho makes him feel so many things.

Words: 849

Yeah, Kinda.

🦊/🐿️

Jisung purses his lips, leans in with his eyebrows raised, eyes gleaming mischief. "Kiss me."

God, he's so relentless. He just won't quit, will he? Has no respect for the fact that if Jeongin kisses him once, he might never be able to stop. Stupid. Jeongin kisses his own fingers, then presses them to the back of Jisung's hand, mutters "There," then raises his phone back up to keep scrolling.

Words: 2,136

Taking Turns

🦊x everyone

Rated: T

bebepieuvre once said that "if Jeongin's hyungs aren't taking turns kissing him then 😡 😤 😠"

I agree. Big-time.

Words: 2,254

[bishiglomper]

Damnit

I can't sleep

I took a whole muscle relaxant but.... yeah

My brain won't stfu

I keep trying to run scripts

Being one of those self conscious autistics freaking SUCKS

I figured out how I could ask Amir stuff though.

I'm weird and can't curse IRL without some major effort so to just SAY "You don't have to fuck to be fab" is already hard enough without the extra layers of social anxiety that come with it. I was about to conceded defeat with that idea. But fuck it I'll just hand him a note like "Can you say this line as Alastor pls?"

Also I was kind of hoping for a-

"You dont have to fuck to be fab, darling!"

But then I thought if he did it more like-

"You dont have to fuck to be fab, my dear."

THEY HAVE SUCH DIFFERENT VIBES AND I LOVE THEM BOTH like a "let your freak flag fly" VS encouragement UUGH how do I verbalize that exkncbfjsn. Like honestly if he did the latter I might get teary fr 🥺

Also that would be fun to share with a panel and voice it at a mic but LOL like i could do that. 💀

Also. If I WERE to have the courage to use the mic..

I would want to pose a question to him as Alastor, and say something like "Do you consider yourself asexual? (a sexual)" (ty 🤭 @grownupchangeling)

But that's a very risky chance of Amir catching onto the wordplay let alone expecting him to run with it.

Though.....

If I can get a hold of him before the Sunday panel (which, I freaking hope I would) Maybe I could just run it by him and then he'd be prepared.. 👀

See, I told you, my brain just won't shut up. I'm so anxious lmao I hate speaking to people. I wish I could just emote irl. Sigh.

You know nephew is so different when he's in a mask costume. Pikachu or plague doctor, he loves interacting with people. He actually had the confidence to sit away from his family to join other kids at an interactive thing at the Ren Faire, and he sat himself at the edge of the road to greet and pass out gems to passerbys. He's just totally different.

My friends said her kid was like that too. With masked costumes, they're just more confident. And she can tell how comfortable they are by whether they're wearing their covid mask or not.

I. DO NOT HAVE THAT.

IT REALLY OFFENDS ME THAT I DO NOT HAVE THAT.

I cannot put on that type of mask, my self consciousness runs too fucking deep. I can't even play imaginary with kids. I can't read/sing aloud. Barely even alone. I feel like too much of an idiot.

One time anime club asked me to explain the plot of the anime we were gonna watch because they didn't see the first episode, but I had. The lights were off, I was in a corner, I didn't have to look at anyone and they didn't have to see me. I also knew beforehand that they were going to ask it of me. I did it but I felt like I was on fire. Even all that only helped by like 15%.

It is just. So bad. So, so bad. My online interactions are only marginally better. The think-to-text filter is a lot more forgiving than the think-to-speech one.

...........

So anyway, that's the trauma dump of the day ✨️💅 I hope you enjoyed your stay ✌️

[obsidiaspell]

Chapter 3: The Bitter Truth

Yes I am continuing this, yes it is because of the one person who liked all my MoL posts. @lady-without-name this is for you

Here we go again, insert meme.

Warding honestly sounds like such an interesting subject, I relate to having a teacher that sucks at teaching though, discrete mathematics my beloved. Syrokian highlands - yes the government wants you to know how to work here, wink wink. Oh what I would not give for just a novel of Zach and Zorian being a part of an expedition meant to establish an outpost in the Northern Forest.

ah once again we are foreshadowing Zach being a time-traveller. You know I remember reading this the first time, I was unfortunately a bit spoiled because it literally said in the description of the book there is a timelooper present. I wonder if I would have figured it out myself.

Yeah he still can't do female voices. I am really dunking on the narrator a lot aren't I? I would switch to just reading it, but and audiobook is so convenient tho.

Zorian searching for a word throuple lmao. At least he knows when to stay in his own lane, I like that about him. "He did nothing to me, I am not going to get him into trouble."

No, he could detect no disapproval in posture, and he was pretty sure she’d be rather annoyed if she sensed his plans. explain to me once again Mister Kazinski how you absolutely cannot be an empath?

You want them to learn 10 dances in one week? I barely learned 10 dances when I had my dancing lessons in several months?

I can relate to not wanting to have a relationship with a classmate because the rest of the class would make it unbearable, god I am remembering high school now. "I am nobody! A third son of a minor merchant family from the middle of nowhere." - muahahaha, oh the sweet power of hindsight

Yeah, Zach is a prime protagonist hero material, but he is gonna need you, isn't he?

OK this right here was a moment Ilsa lost me, I hate, hate I tell you, when a child (he is fifteen, it counts) tells you something is bothering them, they have a problem with something you listen. Even if he didn't have empathy headache and it was just some plain old social anxiety this approach vexes me so much! I get headaches too blah blah blah. Her getting Akoja to go with him, is problematic at best. I know she has a crush, but still if he says he doesn't want a day why force him?

and of course, the wise ones know this is not at all Benisek's fault, but our time traveler pulling the strings

Aah fortov comes on the scene. I am kind of curious how that really went down, you know the whole purple creeper patch thing. But we are about to see Kael, our first time loop ally.

This chapter does a good job of setting up some things for later and how Zorian feels about his place in society and the greater world, as in he does not want the world to care about him at all.

[daemonwritesstuff]

MATCHUP TRADE WITH @pleasehelpaaaa

A/N: Hihi!! First off I wanna say that you seem like such a cool person to me omg, also I am very happy I interacted with you! Your really nice and very understanding and I hope you enjoy these matchups as much as I enjoyed mine you made :) also I’d totally be happy to do another exchange with you whenever you’d like <3

For Obey Me, You have been matched with…

Satan!

This may be shocking to you but he was the first person that came to my mind when reading your information and honestly… he seemed to fit you so much, he’s probably a partner that’ll vibe with you the most and also understand you the most.

He’s a pretty harsh person yeah, but for some reason he was able to soften up a lit tile but towards you from the start, which the other brothers find shocking since no one’s really able to make him do that, even automatically, there’s just something about your aura that makes him attracted, like a moth to a flame.

You guys can both help each other with your emotions! I suggest not trying to get into any arguments or fights… with each other, but he would never hit you, he’ll only allow you to hit him (which is very rarely), also I can see you guys gossiping a lot! like shit talking the people you hate to each other while having the best sweets out to eat!

He will listen to you for hours to hear you ramble about what you’ve been into lately, he will make some comments here and there, and also some little jokes. If you ever drift out of something he’ll be there to tap you out and remind you what you were doing and will possibly help you if you need it.

I personally think he’d be able to help you with your anxiety, he definitely knows how to make anxiety go *poof* for the longest time, whatever your stressing with you don’t have to worry anymore… he can take care of it.

Here’s a song that reminds me of you two <3

For Honkai Star Rail, You have been matched with…

Adventurine!

This is probably another shocking match, but really you’d be the best partner for him and he would be the best partner for you! you guys are kinda complete opposites but match each other really well, you remind him of dr ratio a lot for some odd reason, I’ll leave that to your imagination…

He will join you in your hobbies on his free time! He really likes doing things you like… you guys are like a very fun couple! He’s able to get you to get in touch with your feelings, I also feel like it would take some time to even realize he had feelings for you (since you guys were friends before you even became romantic partners).

He’s gonna help you with your anxiety a lot, he may push you to try new things or get out of your comfort zone but he doesn’t go too far since he doesn’t want you to end up hating him or even start fighting with him. Oh and he loves gossip, I can tell you how many times he’s came to you about so many stuff happening, you basically know all the tea with everyone.

He loves hearing you play the violin a lot, he’ll be there for any recitals (if you have any) and he’s the best person to go to whenever your social energy runs out, he’ll be pampering you so good and spoiling you with your comfort foods and new, but small gifts!

Here’s a song that reminded me of you two <33

For Fairy Tail, You have been matched with…

Jellal Fernandes!

Best couple to ever exist. He’s been through a lot of things and would be very understanding and caring towards you. he’ll help you whenever your anxiety gets bad and the same thing with adventurine he’ll pamper you whenever he can and give you many soft kisses and cuddles <33

Even though he lost faith before he’s still that kind and gentle person still, you made him see that things would get better that things would be all okay in the end, your his light to the end of every dark tunnel he goes into.

He doesn’t seem like the person to talk much, so it may be a tad bit awkward at first but when you get to know each other more better he’ll love listening to you ramble about your hyperfixations about the things your interested in and will try to get into them with you so he can also add in some comments about whatever it is that your into.

He’ll help you handle your emotions for you, he wants to make you feel happy since you also made him happy when you came into his life, again, he’s very understanding and caring towards you and will give you time if you need it, only the best towards his soulmate <3

He would do wood carvings with you! I can see him doing that a lot on his free time /IMO and also pretty much any kind of art, you guys definitely do date nights in one of your houses and do paintings together while eating many baked goods and also chugging down so much soda, coffee, etc…

Here’s a song that reminded me of you two<33

[sailingmakai]

𝘒𝘕𝘖𝘞𝘐𝘕𝘎  𝘠𝘖𝘜𝘙  𝘗𝘈𝘙𝘛𝘕𝘌𝘙  𝘞𝘌𝘓𝘓  𝘊𝘈𝘕  𝘗𝘖𝘛𝘌𝘕𝘛𝘐𝘈𝘓𝘓𝘠  𝘔𝘈𝘒𝘌  𝘞𝘙𝘐𝘛𝘐𝘕𝘎  𝘛𝘖𝘎𝘌𝘛𝘏𝘌𝘙  𝘈  𝘓𝘖𝘛  𝘌𝘈𝘚𝘐𝘌𝘙.

REPOST DO NOT REBLOG !!

NAME: Sev

PRONOUNS :  She/They!

PREFERENCE  OF  COMMUNICATION  : Mostly Discord, but I can do tumblr too if needed/preferred

NAME  OF  MUSE(s)  : Akira Kurusu! (For this blog anyway; if you wanted Discord we'd be here a while lmao)

EXPERIENCE  /  HOW  LONG  (  MONTHS  /  YEARS? )  : RP, since 2013-ish. My first-ever blog was made around there, and I've been RPing ever since, but I've been writing for a good few years before that. I'd saaaay maybe four or five? I can't check since I deleted all my oldest stuff, but it's around there.

BEST  EXPERIENCE :  In general, I'd say an RP I did with a pair of friends from another fandom with another muse from years ago - where my muse was being chased down by a worried friend after having run away (after either hurting them or BEING hurt, can't recall), and was offered a deal with the demon sin of Gluttony, which he took and has since forever regretted - that one took until 4am and was one of my favorites~ I don't think I've had something that's made me stay up that late just to get more of it, since.

RP  PET  PEEVES  /  DEALBREAKERS : I definitely hate when people control my character - taking them and making them act or move more than just briefly describing them taking a thing in a plot/thread where we both know they're gonna take the thing.

One dealbreaker I have though - Guilt trips. I've had people do this to me before where for whatever reason, I didn't really wanna thread something - either the thread itself wasn't something I wanted to do or I just plain didn't vibe with their muse and made an effort to tell them as politely as possible that I didn't think my muse would be able to interact well, if at all, with theirs. And always, ALWAYS the response would be them going to their blog, and vague-posting about me and how I should be writing with THEM if I wanted to rp so bad, as well as people guilting me into refollowing them after deciding I didn't want to follow them after all, usually for the above reasons of 'my muses won't gel with theirs after all, whoops'. Basically - if you knowingly, intentionally, try to leverage my anxiety as a means to keep me interacting with you, you can consider me gone. For good.

MUSE  PREFERENCES  FLUFF,    ANGST  OR  SMUT  : Fluff and angst are both amazing. Smut... Technically I'm okay with smut as a concept, but given the characters here are early-20's at best, and canonically in the range of 17, I do not want it on my blog in any capacity. I will block you if you try. Romance is fine, don't get me wrong! I love doing soft fluffy romance~! But I ain't doing no sideways tango shit with anyone but my old Layton buddies, because all our muses there are grown men and women in their 30's and 40's at LEAST.

PLOTS  OR  MEMES  : Plots. I am... extraordinarily bad at writing non-serious stuff. Even when I TRY to do sillies, they always come out serious. Sigh.

LONG  OR  SHORT  REPLIES  : I can do both! Buuuut if we thread a thread long enough my replies WILL steadily grow stupid long. I don't know why. It just... happens... ;w;

BEST TIME TO WRITE :  Any time! All time! As long as I'm awake! I have endless free time due to being pretty damn unhireable due to a perfect storm of people-based social anxiety, poor memory, and inability to develop marketable skills!

But yes - I'm awake and online pretty regularly any time between 9am and 12am Newfoundland time.

ARE  YOU  LIKE  YOUR  MUSE(S) : God I wish. I do channel a little bit of myself into them, and I wouldn't be surprised if that shows, but I'm nothing like Akira, nor any of his au's I've got in here. Don't have enough spine for that, lmao.

TAGGED  BY  :  Stolen from @soulsbetrayed!

TAGGING : Go ham, my darlings

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

For the nonnie that was curious about why I don’t like Bernadetta (Marianne will be in another post because this one is pretty long):

I actually suffer from the exact same condition she does and have been diagnosed for agoraphobia. Unfortunately it turns out IS does in fact not know how to write people who are afraid to leave their rooms/houses and makes it seem like we just can't so much as have a conversation with people in person or have to do so from behind a door. People like me can leave our rooms and go out and shit - it's just extremely anxiety ridden.

My biggest issue with Bernadetta is that she's played explicitly for laughs and there's little to no actual tackling of her issues. She screams and runs off because lol funnies, but she also never listens to what anyone says to her and immediately starts insulting herself while ignoring the entire conversation. The thing is, if she were real, I wouldn't even be able to tell her she's wrong about herself because no, she's the most annoying thing on the planet and I found myself agreeing with EdeIgard in their C and B supports when EdeIgard was basically like ffs woman just stfu and actually listen to the conversation instead of making up what's happening.

The whole screaming and running away constantly would need to be removed completely for me to even consider the rest of her character (which is also pretty bland, but when she actually learns how to hold a conversation she's somewhat tolerable). No amount of "oh no Bernie now everyone hates you" is gonna make me like her. In fact, it's true I do hate her because she constantly puts herself down in that specific way, and well... when people do that irl, it's literal manipulation. People want you to say the opposite of the bad things. If that were me, I'd immediately just say yeah, you know what, everyone does hate you because you say shit like that constantly and can't hold a single conversation because uwu your dad was mean to you.

I didn't have the best relationship with my own dad some years ago, and sometimes it was really bad. Neither of us could even hold a conversation because whenever he said anything to me it was some jab at me, and that was during severe mental illness for me. He's learning how mental illness works now, but my relationship with him and somewhat my mom, like Bernadetta, wasn't really good. We were extremely dysfunctional. That didn't make me hide away from every single conversation from all other people though, and her entire character is excessive and beyond unrealistic. Part of it is also the whole "oh no me and my dad had a bad relationship, now I'm going to scream and run away from everyone ever except the avatar character so people can self insert their love for me". zzzzz i sleep

In my opinion too, as someone who suffers from the exact same mental illness, it's actually pretty insulting. The only conversation I have any memory of being able to even remotely tolerate was her and Dorothea's B support. The thing is, she has a story... but it's completely overshadowed by idiocy and the writers being like "lol this must be what agoraphobia is like amirite".

She needs better development and a better delivery of what her story actually is. All her interactions, every single one, are exactly the same. Every. Single. One. Screams, runs away. Does so until the last support with the respective characters and has miniscule growth. Does not have any varied conversations and every single one takes the same outline and hurls back up the same exact thing that happened in the other support. Let me tell you, Fates was infamous for that and my feelings on its supports stand. Bernadetta was like super bad Fates writing on crack, and that's... uh... that's a new low for FE writing lol. Fates had bad writing to begin with.

I know it's also the fact that they took social anxiety and tried it to make it lol funnies bc lol ppl can relate, but like... people who genuinely have that very real issue do not behave like that and to me, it's not funny. It's not cute and "uwu I just want to protect her." It's just extremely annoying and irritating and in fact, I just want to slap her square in the face and tell her to never open her mouth again because HOOEE. There's a big difference between having a mental illness and being outright annoying to everyone you speak to, and having a mental illness doesn't excuse particular socially damaging (to others) behaviors.

Like... I hate her with a fiery hot burning passion when I actually think about the way they handled her in Houses. She's pretty barely above Edelgard in that sense.

As far as more on why I don’t like her, I did mention a lot of it in these posts which explained why the topic itself is so problematic in how it was written.

Hopes:

Regarding Hopes, they actually did remove some of that nonsense as far as the main story. She was quieter and could handle being out in the war (at least while having Ferdinand at her side which yes, that can be realistic! Having a friend with you when you have to go out and you're anxious to go out can really help). Her supports are still absolute trash and should be in the dumpster instead of all the useful things you can find dumpster diving in business' dumpsters, but the main story severely toned down the bullshit.

Her supports are still infuriating (besides with Marianne), but luckily she doesn't have as many in Hopes since supports were less of a feature in the game overall. They were better... somewhat... but not great. Her support with Marianne is essentially the character we should have gotten as her whole character when she associates with anyone at all, because just because she had a rocky relationship with her dad doesn't mean she should look at every single human being ever and fear the things she feared from her dad. What happened with her and her dad doesn't mean everyone is her dad and she should realistically know that. Even if she has a hard time coming out of her shell, she should still do that, slowly learning about people but quickly realizing, based on the amount of people she can meet in GM, that nobody is like her dad.

Ironically the C and B supports she had with EdeIgard were pretty much me letting my emotions out somewhat through EdeIgard lol.

Like you said, the writers handle Bernadetta like a joke character and tbh, I'm frankly disgusted by her popularity as someone who now has to acknowledge that the fandom at large treats my mental illness and anxiety as a lol funny joke. It's crippling and it's why I can barely function outside of my house, and it's certainly not something to laugh about when it causes struggles getting a job because most jobs are, and have been entirely until recently, jobs that you had to leave home to get to. Even online/office jobs were in a location outside of one's home. The fact that the fandom completely feeds into this joke writing means they enjoy it and have only proved the writers correct that anxiety is a joke worth laughing at if you struggle to leave your house.

The representation part of it:

In other words, when anxiety gets that bad, it can be played for laughs and people will enjoy it in media. The problem with that is exactly the same as older media concerns, like showing deeply autistic characters (ex. ones who have warped facial features due to their autism) and shaming them for "being ugly" or otherwise facially abnormal. Another example, media's habit of fat shaming and making fat characters to have them be a fat joke. Berandetta is exactly those things, just with another skin of socially abnormal and neurodivergent behavior being laughed at because it's not "socially normal or acceptable irl".

A perfect example would be unfortunately the Naruto series, that I grew up loving but recently looked back on and saw that a good chunk of it was nothing but cringe. There are literally fat jokes that are so bad in the sequel series, Boruto, that an overweight character literally insults herself with the fat jokes and it’s written to be humor. It's... bad. Bernadetta is literally that, possibly even in a more extreme way.

There’s also the fact that, like I mentioned in one of the linked posts, they give her the very strange interest of “weird plants”, as if to imply they believe shut ins are and do strange things that most people would gawk at, when no, we actually do normal things everyone else does.

I’ve been struggling with this anxiety in a severe way for over five straight years. It’s not funny and we don’t do unusual, abnormal things or have “weird” interests. We also don’t scream and run away from people trying to have a simple, friendly conversation with us. Her self depricating is also ridiculous and we don’t do that out in the open. People like myself tend to only speak to individuals we really trust about those insecurities. While we do have a hard time having any confidence, we don’t just blurt it out and scream it in front of someone mid-conversation. Like I said, people who do that irl are doing it for attention and to get compliments. Having her do that is a very bad look on people who actually have this illness.

Like, I know it seems like I’m making a Big Deal about it, but to me this is no different than people seeing fat jokes played for laughs, or having the token black character who is often the butt of jokes or even just there for the creator(s) to say “there’s a black character so you can’t say we didn’t do it”. It feels like it was just forced in because “it was the new trend online”.

The problem is that people actually ate it up and were happy with “representation”, even if that representation was actually insulting and extremely left field from what the representation is supposed to be like. When creators see incorrect interpretation being lauded as awesome and great, they won’t care if it was well done or not because it sold well and people expressed love for it. Those people not caring about how accurate the representation is is exactly the group of people who are hurting those of us who are trying to get others, and media, to understand that we don’t want that and yes, we want representation, but not for it to be so off par that it’s not even representing at all at that point.

Basically they made both a horribly annoying character and a total failure of a soecial anxiety representation. Like, I don’t even hate Micaiah to this extent and she used to be my most hated FE character until uwugard and Bernadetta happened.