#so. i want to pit them against each other

[juicebuck]

i can't stop thinking about buck making everyone do grief assessments. because on the surface, it looks like concern. but it's not that. or not just that. it's buck attempting to Clipboard Buck the situation because he needs to feel like he's in control of something. it's almost—like it's a way to disconnect from the grief. dissociate from it. clinicalise it. he's doing the grief assessments for himself, not for them. and i don't think he realises. that he's alienating them by turning their grief into something clinical. something that can be measured in numbers. almost pitting them against each other. whose grief is the worst? who scored the highest? who can match mine? almost like he’s desperate for proof that someone feels as lost and hopeless as he's trying so hard not to be. when he could just, ask. all he needs to do is ASK. but he won't ask. because it's not really about them. and i don't think he realises that. what he’s been doing. until he watches eddie break. until he has no other choice. until he's being confronted with the fact. he's been measuring everyone's grief as a way to deal—or not deal—with his own. he's been doing it in a way that meant he didn't have to talk about their grief in any real way. but in a way where he could control and be disconnected from it. you get a 17. you get a 12. he wants so desperately to feel like he's not alone in his grief without dealing with the reality of not just his grief. but everyone else's. because that would make it real. and it would make it something he can no longer control. and it's the only thing he feels like he has any control over right now. bobby said, they'll need you. and buck internalised it so much that he tried to prove to them all via grief assessment that they did. because he needed them to need him. because he needed to feel in control. and the thing is eddie DID need him. eddie DID feel just as lost and hopeless as buck did. but buck couldn't see that. because he scored him a 12. it's HEARTBREAKING. god.

[fruitiesss]

|| SWALLOW YOU WHOLE ||

PART 1

There is a darkness that surrounds your new team. It is something you have never seen before.

tags: reader gets a wound, ew blood, the thunderbolts are found family, nightmares, the void word count: 2k

pairing: eventual bob x gn reader

a/n: wowowowowow this took time to plan out and i actually proofread this time. Pls enjoy. Lmk if you want another part to it.

Every sound around you was muffled, your ears ringing as Bucky and John took each arm and pulled you away from the middle of combat, Yelena crouching in front of you to snap her fingers in your face and ask a question that fell deaf on your ringing ears. She held up 3 fingers and started talking, her lips moving but nothing reaching you. The battle around you slowed as the two super soldiers sat you against the outer wall of the watchtower, John pressing his hands firmly against your stomach and crouching beside you so the other two could finish the fight off. Your head fell forward and shoulders sagged while he held you up with his sturdy arm.

With time, the sound seemed to return to you, intensifying with each passing moment. John had left you and someone else had come to your aid. Bob's hand splayed across your font as he kept you from getting up that you returned with a grunt of exhaustion and protest. He shook his head and slid his arm underneath your knees and supported your back and he lifted you up and carried you inside to safety. With your senses shot, you succumbed to sleep.

Darkness. Pain. Void. Your eyes shot open to nothing, an empty yet endless null. Your heart pounded against your ribs rhythmically as you got to your feet, turning around again and again in an attempt to find something, anything.

The third time you turned, bright amber crowded your vision despite the darkness around you. Two people, man and woman, stood beside each other on a grassy hill deep within the spot of colour. Their faces were hidden and their hands were joined but they looked… uncanny. Wrong.

Dread filled the pit of your stomach as you took an uneasy step back, gaze scanning them up and down as they just stood there, motionless. Their forms twisted, spun and dissipated into the amber alongside the grass of the hill, leaving behind a barren and rotten ground. Perplexed, you took measured steps forward until your canvas shoes hit soft ground. Moving further, you looked over the contour of the hill down onto more barren ground.

Snap.

You whipped around, seeing that the void had vanished, the amber and strange surroundings fully encapsulating what had just been endless black and you shut your eyes for a brief moment, only to open them to the familiar ceiling of the infirmary.

Sitting up with a start, you frightened Bob and Yelena, who had both been sitting beside you since you'd passed out. Bob tilted his head with a quizzical expression and Yelena sat forward, hands out as if she had been ready to catch you.

"What happened?"

According to the rest of the Thunderbolts, you had taken a blow from some enemy they had been stopping, though you strangely don't remember any of it, only the searing pain in your side which had been a blow from their blade evident by the mass of bandages around your midsection. Bob had been the one to carry you inside as he had refrained from using Sentry in battle since the New Avengers were established.

Bob. He sure had been a pivotal relationship in your recent life. You connected with him, his past resonated heavily with yours and you found him genuinely pleasant to be around. He had his dark moments, as did you, so you both helped each other out when you were having trouble. There would be times he was experiencing hardship that you held his hand through, making sure he ate and wasn't alone at all. And there would be times you'd be struggling where he would do the exact same for you. You two had grown to be inseparable and the rest of the team knew it.

That's why you found yourself sneaking into his room late at night when you couldn't sleep or were having nightmares about horrible things, just to feel human touch and comfort. Alexei would make jokes about you two exiting his room together in the morning, which always earned a smack to the back of the head from his daughter. You both grew flustered when it was brought up, stuttering and stammering to brush it off casually but there truly was nothing going on between you in those moments, just shared comfort and warmth.

This was one of those nights. That void you'd woken up in, or dreamt, you really have no idea, had been haunting your thoughts like a ghost. It had you twisting and turning on your plush bed, eyes screwed shut one moment and the next wide open and looking around. Eventually, you sat up and looked around, that dread settling in the pit of your stomach once more as the shadows danced across the walls, taunting and leering at you. Your breath became shallow as you picked up your phone and left your room, pacing the halls for a few minutes before shaking your head and coming to a stop outside the familiar door of his room. Inhaling deeply, you knocked quietly on the hardwood.

Bob answered the door in a matter of seconds, his soft brown hair tousled from sleep and his eyes half lidded from sleep. Your knock had woken him.

"I'm sorry--" You began, interjected by Bob's soft sigh and voice.

"It's fine, come inside. Tell me what's up." He stepped aside, allowing you to slip past him. You sunk onto his teal beanbag that he'd begged to move from the main room to his bedroom, sinking into the beads.

"I can't sleep. There was this dream I had, in this.. void.. you know, not that void, but a different void. There was just nothingness. And it was so vivid." He listened to you ramble and recall the events of that dream, nodding his head along as he woke up properly. His hands came to rest on top of yours as your voice trailed off in the middle of a sentence, eyes meeting his. "Bob..?"

He squeezed once, twice, three times and sighed again, holding your hands firmly between his. "It was just a nightmare." He reassured. "I haven't been using my powers, so there's no way that I-- that he can do anything like this." His eyes were weary, exhausted. "Come and sleep, okay?"

Searching his eyes, you nodded and stood alongside him, slipping into bed beside him and wrapping your arms around him. His hand found its place on your back, making sure it was alright to place it there before doing it. His soft breathing lulled you to sleep.

The next week was a blur. You were forced to take a step back and focus on healing while the others got missions, all except from Bob, who had been staying beside you and helping you with every step. He had been your rock during all of this, without him you wouldn't have healed as fast as you had. Now it was Saturday, the whole team got together every Saturday for what you referred to as 'Family Game Night' to Bucky's dismay (he secretly loves it).

You, Bob, Alexei and Ava were sat on the couch while Bucky, John and Yelena were on chairs around the coffee table, each of you holding a set of uno cards with the discard and deck on the coffee table. You had changed into your pyjamas after you had all eaten dinner together, the comfiest pair you owned. It was a cream set, oversized fit, with small grooves in the fabric like corduroy.

"I am greatest at this game!" Alexei announced, setting down a wild draw four and making John pick up four new cards. He sighed and threw a blue one on the pile with a grumble and rolled eyes. Yelena put another blue one on the pile while Bob set down his blue one on top of theirs with a triumphant smile.

"Uno." He grinned, holding his single card close and shielding it from Ava, who was trying to peer over his hand.

You sighed and drew a card while Ava, still trying to see Bob's card, lazily placed her next card onto the pile. Alexei laughed again, the sound booming around the living room, and placed his next card. It was a draw 2. Walker smirked and set down another draw two, shooting a victorious glance at Alexei as Bucky sighed exasperatedly, drawing the four cards and tipping his head back so he was looking at the ceiling.

Bucky would win, Bob would end up with eight cards and a grudge, and you would retire to bed moments after they began to argue. You'd had your fun for tonight, so now it was time to rest. Your wound had been pulsing with aches and pains all day but you had persisted and now it was time to suffer the consequences.

Sleep would come but not easily which was a recurring factor of yours nights recently. Dreamless, boring nights without interrupting Bob. It was torture.

Alas, you closed your eyes and started counting sheep. But then you opened your eyes to a sharp noise.

You were in a laboratory. Clinical white intruded on your gaze as you dazed around, squinting at the harsh light around you. A dark figure sat atop a medical bed in an alcove of the lab, head sagged forward and stance defeated. Two humanoid shadows standing either side of it, their borders bleeding into the surroundings and posed as if they had been in excruciating pain for whatever had come before.

Your eyes widened as you eased forward again, still dressed in your cream pyjamas. Your heart pounded in your ears, the light becoming too much, too harsh, burning your retinas.

The figure stood slowly, lead by it's head, and faced you. It was all black, as if what was standing there was devoid of light. A void. The void.

Your heart leaped into your throat as the dots began to connect. "You--"

It cocked it's head with a sickening crack, and you woke up with a sharp gasp, sitting up and accidentally tearing a stitch or two. Your face contorted into a wince as you held your side, gasping your air. your throat constricted around your gasps, eyes watering as red seeped into your clean bandages. Calming down, you peeled your duvet off of you and glanced down at your bandage. You'll have to change it.

You stood from your bed and left the safe confines of the room, the tall walls feeling like they were caving in on you as your limped, clutching your side as if it was a fresh wound. Uneven steps echoed throughout the hallway while you made your way to the medical bay, your eyes bloodshot from the strain and stress of what you had woken up from. Your heart still pounded in your ears like you had just been ripped from the dream and placed back into reality, never changing.

The digital clock on the tray in the infirmary bleeped in and out, red digits reading 5:28AM as you sat on the first bed in the row, unwrapping your bandages from your middle. Blinking through bleary eyes, you took the supplies you had gathered and soaked a cloth in antiseptic, pulling the skin taut to clean it when you noticed something. The edges of the gash were seeping droplets of blood here and there but where you had the skin stretched, your eyes caught something that had that unease settling in your gut again. Where the skin parted in a smooth line across your midsection, a dusty pool of black seemed to ebb onto the surface from inside. It was surreal, something you have never seen before in anyone. It began to grow, the veins around the wound turning black and stretching around your middle like lightning. It was slow, and then it stopped.

What was going on with you?

[filmbyjy]

Hiiii can I make a niki request? Where him and reader are trying to bake a cake or something and they end up burning the kitchen down🤣🤣

a/n: now that is funny, jay would definitely just look at the kitchen and be like "bruh." also i do apologise that it is quite short

we burnt that?

jay has always reminded both you and ni-ki to be careful in the kitchen. you were both never great at cooking or baking. if you even thought about picking up a knife to cut something, you'd feel a spatula smacked right onto the back of your hand.

"no." jay would say. it was a simple rule that jay always told the other boys.

"(name) and ni-ki aren't allowed in the kitchen." he'd warn them. usually they'd follow but today they made mistake.

all 6 of them had their own schedules at HYBE, outdoors or some pop up store. they seem to have forgotten...

"okay, what do you want to make?" you had asked your dearest best friend. ni-ki looks over your shoulder, reading the cook book. he points right onto the sweet chocolate cake.

"that seems simple. we have all the ingredients at the dorm already, perfect!" he says.

and so the cake baking journey starts. it was simple really, you had followed the steps in the book. they gave detailed and simple instructions that even a toddler would understand. ni-ki easily stirs up the bowl. you had opened the bag of flour, it rips completely open and you were covered in it. it goes dead silent and ni-ki slowly looks up at you.

soon enough, the both of you fell into pits of laughter. he points out the flour in your hair. honestly, if anyone was in the dorm, they'd probably think you and ni-ki were dating. of course, you two did have feelings for each other but were you two going to cross that line? who knows.

"let me help, oh god." he reaches out to swipe the flour off your face. it causes you to sneeze and he flinches a little. "okay, ew. snot."

"fuck you? you made me sneeze."

"uhh, no? the flour did." you reached out to smack ni-ki. he laughs.

"okay! i'm sorry. let's continue baking and finish it before they others get back. jungwon says that they're finishing their schedule in an hour."

"your fault." you stuck your tongue out teasingly and ni-ki does the same.

with haste, both you and ni-ki managed to finish the batter and pour it right into the cake tin. ni-ki makes sure that he sets the timer to 15 minutes before going over to where you had sat.

"you do realise that you're still covered in flour."

"no shit sherlock. i don't have a shirt to change into."

"well, you can lend mine. you should go bathe too since it's in your hair. you look like a grandma still."

"thanks. you said you'd grow old with me." you had sarcastically said.

"and i will but not when i'm still young and good looking." ni-ki smirks. you gave him a sarcastic smile and then a middle finger.

"shirt and towel, please."

"yeah, yeah." he goes over to his bedroom and hands you a shirt and towel. "do you need shorts?"

"yeah, sure." he hands you some shorts and you were on your way to the bathroom. you had quickly taken a shower and once you were out, ni-ki stays frozen.

"you look like you've seen a ghost." you say as you squeezed your hair dry. ni-ki steps closer to you and you stepped back. "earth to nishimura riki. hey." you had waved your hand in front of him.

"you look really..." he trails off. you were about to say something when you felt the cold wall right against your back. "stupid." he grabs your towel and covers your head with it. you snatched the towel and groaned.

"yah, nishimura. don't do that." he laughs. "stupid."

"why? felt your heart racing? i know, you like me too much." he sticks his tongue out and you start to chase him.

it seems though, both you and ni-ki did not hear the alarm ringing. the both of you were too blissfully enjoying each other. at some point in time, ni-ki trips and falls onto the couch. you fall right on top of him. you were up close to him. the tension felt undeniable at this point, ni-ki leans in.

just as you barely felt ni-ki's lips right on yours, you heard the keypad numbers beeping. you and ni-ki looked up at the door, not moving an inch from your position.

"we're home!" jungwon says as the door unlocks. jake, sunoo and jungwon stopped in their tracks. they were about to question the position you and ni-ki were in when they smelt something bad. something burning...

they turned their heads to the side and there, the black smoke erupting from the oven. sunoo gasps first.

"jungwon get the manager." he says. jungwon runs to get their manager. jake looks around for the fire extinguisher and sprays it right on the oven. he also turns on the the hood to allow the black smoke to go away.

once it was settled, he sighs. he stares right at you and ni-ki.

"never bake ever again." jake warns. both you and ni-ki nodded, too afraid of how angry jake looked right now.

✎ᝰ. lesson learnt: never bake ever

✎ᝰ. lesson learnt for the other boys: never leave you and ni-ki alone ever again

and yes, jay has banned the both of you from completely coming into the kitchen. at least though, both you and ni-ki were finally and happily dating.

[moriitis]

A Beautiful Nightmare.

creeping out of writers block, this will be bad - click on image for song inspiration.

"Toby?"

There was a gentle knock, enough to fill the silence and the person behind the door hesitated before creeping inside the dimly lit room. The air was thick with tension, the smell of alcohol and it had become frightfully hot behind those closed doors. Lyra crept in, cautious and narrowing her eyes just enough to let them adjust to the darkness within the room around her. She could notice his figure, Toby, sat at his desk with his back turned to her. He was hunched over, the absent sound of pencil against paper as he scribbled away - his anger baring deep marks into the sheet below. Lyra could feel his anger radiating off him in heaps, each wave pushing her further away from the boy she once knew and her heart ached - ached for what could've been, what they deserved. There was so much she wanted to say, wanted to do, but how could she?

"Hey," her voice was soft, frail as she stepped in and closed the door behind her slowly with a gentle click. Lyra couldn't help but practically tiptoe across the carpeted room, eyes gentle and forgiving upon his frame that was trembling. Her own anger, pain and anguish was pushed aside; her only care being her younger brother. Approaching him within arms reach, gently her fingertips grazed the top of his shoulder and his trembling suddenly paused, the pencil in his hand stilling as his body froze at the touch. "It's just me," she reassured softly, craning her head around his frame to catch a glimpse of his face, but Toby only looked away.

What had happened tonight was the same as any night. A night of hurt, a night of longing for something that wasn't cursed words and careless slaps across the cheeks. The same drunk babbling about the government, about how Mom's cooking was awful, about how broke they were and how they were on the verge of losing the house. Fingers being pointed at one another, screams that filled the night and left a burning headache brewing in her mind. A night of trying to protect Mom, a night of trying to pull the weight of Dad off Toby. It was the same as any other night, a routine that was engrained in her mind, a part of her dreading the time ticking on to nine, when her Dad arrived home and seemed to split the family in two. They would be so much better off without him and Lyra knew it was an awful thing to think about.

Gently, her fingers gave a reassuring squeeze and it was there she leant forward to brush some brown locks away from Toby's face, letting her catch a glimpse of his pale skin. The deep bruise on his eye was unforgiving, a terrible yet beautiful mix of red and purple - it was deep and his eye began to swell. It hurt to look at and yet, she was thankful that he couldn't feel it. With a twist in her brow, she sighed.

"Are you okay?" and she knew as soon as she spoke those words - it was useless to ask such a question. Toby's silence made her grow a sense of worry, a motherly nature within her igniting a spark in the pits of her chest and it was there she chewed carelessly on the bottom of her red lip. She ached to hear his voice, for him to say something, hell, even if he shouted at her; she would understand it entirely. His absent minded scribbling began to continue and it was there Lyra finally glanced down at the piece of paper. Toby was always such an expressive artist, especially when he couldn't find the right words when he was so consumed in his own anger. Only, the paper was nothing but a mess of scribbles, words she couldn't make out in the mess of granite. "You gonna talk? Or should I just keep talking to myself?" It was an attempt at a gentle joke, teasing him and a smile etched at the corner of her lips, a smile that made the ache in her cheek bite back at her.

Before she could press further, Toby pulled his shoulder away from her grip and her heart broke. Had she done something? The blond wanted to speak but frankly, couldn't find the right words and she shifted from one leg to the other as she sucked in a steady sigh. Maybe he just needed time, maybe should just come back later? Only, as selfish as it sounded, all she wanted was his company right now and so Lyra settled on the bed beside his desk. It squeaked beneath her, the frame barely holding as the springs in the mattress promptly stabbed her soft skin. How could he sleep on this? It used to not feel this way before..

"I guess I'll talk to myself then.." she finally uttered, glancing around his room and leaning back on the palms of her hands. "You know what I'm really, reaaally craving right now?" she asked out into the void, no reply. Lyra pursed her lips and shrugged softly, accepting his stubbornness. "One of those really sugary slushies from the gas station, you know the one that makes your tongue really red," she grinned softly, hoping that this would at the very least encourage Toby to speak up but nothingness, once again. That unbearable silence loomed over the two of them again and she found herself shuffling uncomfortably, not because of the mattress beneath her, but because of the silence that had a deathly grip around her neck. Her gaze adverted from Toby to the door, it had grown quiet out there too. Perhaps finally their father had drunk himself to an early grave.

There, Lyra found herself taking the opportunity to admire her younger brother, the way he held himself, the way he looked. Something was different tonight though and Lyra could've sworn in a blink of an eye, he had grown bigger too. A part of her always found herself wondering what kind of man Toby would turn into, what he would study, the kind of woman, or man, he'd find himself falling in love with. Her heart ached with so much love. Gosh, she could still remember the night Toby was born.

"You know, I remember the night you were born," she smiled softly to herself, the memory becoming so distant, so faded.. Why? "I was still pretty young but I... I think I remember it well.." her brows furrowed and suddenly, a splitting pain erupted in her head, a pain that made her quickly grab her temple in an attempt to soothe it. She could see from the corner of her eye, Toby's sudden concern, though he still heistated to turn to her fully. His head tilted slightly in her direction, those brown eyes piercing from beneath the locks of his hair. It was the first time in a long time she felt he had actually noticed her. With a raised brow, she narrowed her gaze toward Toby. "Now look at you, with a stubble," she forced a smile, swallowing back the pain. "Hey, when did you grow a stubble..?"

Toby finally pulled away from the desk, the paper below him morphed into something, something so familliar that it struck Lyra in a wave of confusion. Their hatchet, coated in blood and it was there she could see his fingertips were red and stained.

"Toby?" she spoke, her voice in a slight tremble as he stood from the desk and finally turned to face her. The little boy before her now a grown man, looming over her frame and half of his face disfigured in a way that made her gasp. Her stomach churned, it churned as much as it could because now Lyra felt a part of herself was fading, like she wasn't supposed to even be here.

"You are not real," Toby's voice, once soft and gentle, now hard and Lyra felt her heart drop into the pits of her stomach. What did he mean by this? She was here, right here! On his bed, in his room - only now, she wasn't. In fact, she wasn't sure where she were anymore. This wasn't his bedroom, their home? Had she hit her head perhaps?

The girl blinked, trying to make sense of the situation and she felt the bottom of her lip wobble. Not real? She was not.. real? Lifting her hands up, she glanced at her palms, they were also red, some of her skin had been de-gloved and two of her fingers were twisted in a way that was not possible - broken. Lyra wanted to scream but she couldn't because now, she suddenly found herself gargling, like she were underwater and her lungs were filling. Despite it all, her mouth felt unbelievably dry and a metallic taste hugged her taste buds, blood seeping out from the corners of her mouth as she opened her mouth to let out empty screams, her hands and fingers wrapping around her neck in a desperate attempt to breathe, to get oxygen - air, anything!

"Stop that," Toby warned, unable to look at the scene before him as he grimaced away. He knew this wasn't Lyra, that she wasn't here and yet the pleading look in her dead eyes made him want to embrace her in nothing but a warm hug - in an attempt to save her from something that was already too late. "Stop that!" He was yelling now, fists curled as Lyra gasped for air and suddenly her once plump cheeks began to rot before him. The skin sinking in, hugging her bones and Lyra sunk down onto her knees, practically fitting before him. His heart was pounding against his ribcage, mind telling him to run, heart telling him to help. Only, what was he to do? She wasn't real, Lyra is dead. "You're fucking dead! You're not real! Get out, get the fuck out!" Toby was yelling incoherently, his fingers twitching to reach for the hatchet but instead grabbing fistfuls of his hair in a desperate attempt to drown out her endless gargling. The blood was everywhere, her blood was on the floor, on his shoes and it was flowing out of her mouth like a fountain that wouldn't stop.

The brunette suddenly lurched forward, wanting to grab his sister's shoulders and shake her back to what she was. Only, his hands phased through her very being and he collapsed onto his own knees, huffing and gasping for breath as he frantically began to blink the sleep away from his eyes.

The darkness of the room swallowed him whole and Toby laid motionless on the floor, feeling the hot warmth of his tears trickle down his cheeks. A nightmare, a fucking nightmare. His mouth was dry as he slowly sat up, glancing over to his bed on his right. He must've fallen out in the panic. His heart was pounding like a fucking drum and he took the moment to compose himself, cautiously looking around the room as if his sister were still lurking in the shadows. Though, he knew she were gone, six feet under, a rotting corpse that called his name from beyond the grave. A part of him wished he could forget, he was already forgetting what she sounded like and yet, he didn't want to let her go. With a shake in his hand, he brushed some hair out from his eyes and suddenly embraced himself, sobbing hopelessly into his arms. Why couldn't it have been him?

[slayerdurge]

Durgetash Resurrection AU

"Is that...? That's my body. I remember now. The Morphic Pool. The Elder Brain, it... I was dead. What did you do?" "I made a deal... with Lord Bane."

[gangst3rswife]

Currently stressing cause wdym it's almost lando's first win anniversary??

Stressing cause I'm so sure that people will have something to say if he doesn't win this one. cause people are mean and in love with their keyboards. (Then again people will say something regardless of if he wins or not 🙄)

stressing cause imagine the pressure he must be feeling rn. Stressing cause last weekend his strong start was cut short in Q3,, so I'm worried Abt his headspace rn but desperately hoping he's in a good headspace. Ik he has what it takes to move on but stillllll . I swear,, don't want him to have to deal with a loss on top of all the hate he's getting (plus he deserves the win.)

Go Landooooo

[borgialucrezia]

The Borgia brothers + staring at each other "You loved him once. You must love him again."

[fromtheseventhhell]

Another reason that Stansas hate the idea of Arya and Dany being friends (outside of them wanting to demonize Dany) is that they've convinced themselves that Dany and Sansa are the only main female characters, so if a Stark sister is going to have a significant relationship with Dany it has to be Sansa. Arya being constantly downplayed and treated like an accessory to Sansa has generally led to the consensus that her relationship with Dany will be defined by whatever Sansa's relationship (positive or negative) with her is. That's why Arya is always being left out of the "we were robbed of [x] female character friendship" conversations and why theories about Dany/Arya getting along are treated as Sansa hate; Arya, as a character, is seen as secondary to Sansa by a lot of people

[mrmeepsmadmind]

SOCIETY KEEPS KILLING ONE OF THEM BCS THEIR FRIENDSHIP WOULD BE INCAPABLE FOR GALAXIES TO HANDLE !!!!!

[dazzle02]

Fiona and Lip vs Mickey (They did not hate him or treat him unfairly!!)

People love to claim Fiona and Lip were always super unfair to Mickey and I need to get all this out. I said in my last post that I would make this post at some point, and so I'm doing it now because I need to get it out.

I'll start with Lip.

So during the first 3 seasons Lip was the only one who knew about Ian and Mickey. And he was always pretty supportive about it really. At the end of S3 he made one comment to Ian about how the good thing about falling for Mickey was that you could always do better. Was that necessarily nice? No. But I never actually even took it as Lip truly not liking Mickey for Ian. Just as that thing people often do when their friend/sibling goes through a breakup. Trying to make him feel better, and adding in a little trash talk about the person who hurt them. But also, their relationship hadn't exactly been the most healthy. I love Gallavich, but we can all acknowledge that, right? Mickey had beaten Ian up just a couple episodes before that. Also, Lip very rarely got to see them together pre season 4. And when he did, they were pretending there was nothing going on because Mickey didn't know Lip knew. Lip literally saw Mickey walk off to go have sex with Angie while Ian was right there. And sure, he would've likely been told some of the better stuff about their relationship (if it can even be called that in 1-3?) but for the most part he only got to see the bad, and also the bad was what Ian was gonna talk more about because that was when he needed to get things out. So yeah, Lip may have had a little bit of hesitance towards their relationship at that point in time.

And same in early S4 when he asked Ian if it was really a good idea that Mickey was still at the house. That wasn't anything actually against Mickey as a person, that was about the situation and the fact that he knows how much everything hurt Ian.

Also, he knew about Mickey being gay since S1 and Mickey never even suspected he knew anything until S4 when Lip had to hint at it to try and get him to say whether he'd heard from Ian. Lip knew that wasn't something he was supposed to know, and so he only knew it when he and Ian were alone.

In S4 when Lip was looking for Ian, Mickey was the first person he asked after Debbie and Carl. And he didn't push. He just asked if he'd heard from him, the only thing I'd say could be classed as pushing was his "are you really gonna make me spell it out?" about his and Ian's relationship. And even that he quickly backed off from. Then he said he'd let Mickey know what kind of trouble Ian was in once he found out. (And by telling Mandy what was going on, he did...)

Season 5 is where it gets interesting and where I see the most shit about Lip being unfair to Mickey.

We see Lip and Fiona go to Mickey to ask him to try and talk to Ian about going to see a Doctor, they explain the symptoms of Bipolar they're seeing in Ian. They mention Monica to point out that they know what they're talking about. (We also see that Lip is actually amused by Mickey when he's beating that guy up and yelling up to his wife...) And Mickey ignores them. And that must've been SO frustrating and scary for them. But they don't hold it against him, because they understand!

Then we see Mickey go to Lip and ask about the doctor after the debacle with the suitcases. And Lip is visibly worried, but when Mickey tells him things are okay, he believes him. Or he doesn't quite believe him, but he doesn't push. And this is something I often see people think the opposite of. People often seem to believe that Lip will push Mickey over Ian's Bipolar, that he won't let him handle it himself and just insert himself in and not trust Mickey has things handled. And honestly, after this I wouldn't have blamed him if that was true. But it's just NOT.

Then we really get into it. Episode 5 happens. Ian hasn't come home and Mickey goes to find him and learns he left the club with some other guy and he's pissed. But he can't get to Ian, so he goes after Lip. (Just like in 1x03...) He and his brothers invite Lip to join them in their shooting stolen guns at a window thing, then try and leave him to take the fall. They literally could've destroyed his entire life. And look, Lip was an adult and made the choice to join them. But at the end of the day, Mickey was angry at Ian and tried to take that out on Lip. AND IT IS NEVER MENTIONED AGAIN! Lip never holds it against him. He could've. Maybe even should've. But he doesn't.

Because the very next episode is when Ian has taken Yevgeny and Lip goes to the Milkovich house with Fiona and is totally fine with both Mickey and Iggy and it's like nothing happened. And the car scenes!

Mickey apologises because he realises that he should've listened to Fiona and Lip when they told him that Ian needed help. And Lip responds that yes, he should've. Because he should have. Then proceeds to let him know it can get worse. But then the second car scene, once they have Ian. Lip tells Mickey that he did his best. That he knows he tried, and that that's more than most people would do. With no prompting. Literally the episode before this, Mickey and his brothers had tried to set him up for a crime they'd committed and didn't apologise or anything, and yet Lip is so quick to assure him he did okay. Despite the fact that he likely does have some anger at the fact that he didn't listen to them from the start.

Then when he and Fiona are going to pick Ian up from the hospital, he says he thought Mickey would be there. Lip can see how much Mickey loves Ian. He was surprised he wasn't there.

That deleted scene from after Ian didn't go to Mexico with Mickey next. "People say "You always went a little loco when Mickey was around." THAT LINE WASN'T ANYTHING ABOUT IAN'S BIPOLAR OR THE WAY MICKEY HANDLED IT! It was a "I know how in love with Mickey you are and how much you'd do to be with him." That wasn't a criticism of Mickey. And Lip saying he doesn't think he should've gone wasn't either. It was just that he didn't wanna lose his brother, and that he also knew it likely wouldn't be good for his health. (Which I talked about in my last post...)

In Season 10 when Ian tells Lip he thinks Mickey killed Paula, Lip's response is that of course he should lie to the police and say that Mickey was there all night.

Lip literally tells Ian he thinks he should marry Mickey the next episode, but only when he's ready. That first he needs to figure out why he doesn't want to at that moment. And he was right. Ian was so clearly going through something at that point in time, struggling with his feelings of worthiness and about his Bipolar and legally binding Mickey to that for the rest of his life.

And then along with everyone else Lip does everything in his power to make the wedding happen. Which, yes the wedding is also his brother's. But you don't go that far to make sure your brother gets to marry someone you don't approve of or like.

In S11 there's the "family only" moment, but I get what Lip meant there. It wasn't that he didn't consider Mickey to be family, it was that he felt the conversation should only be the Gallagher siblings. This was their childhood home, it was a discussion between them. He also told Tami to back off. The "What so Mickey's family but Tami isn't" thing also didn't come off as a criticism of Mickey being family to me, more as a "Tami is the mother of my child, marriage isn't the only way to become family." But I get that might just be me.

And they butt heads a lot, I get that. But at the end of the day, Lip does approve of Mickey. I'd even go as far as to say he likes and cares about him.

Now onto Fiona.

Let's start with the fact that she had no idea anything was even going on between them until suddenly Mickey was living in their house. And she never really said anything about it. Just had a little confusion about it.

The real starting point is when she realised Ian was Bipolar. People claim she did a bad job at explaining it to Mickey and made it sound like something that could never be stabilised in any way and that the only answer was hospitalisation. But like, she was terrified too. Her little brother who she loves is in a depressive episode and she's just realised he's likely Bipolar and the only experience she has of it is her mother. Monica. She was absolutely terrified because the last experience she had with Monica at that point in time was her slitting her wrists in the kitchen. Her entire childhood was totally chaotic because Monica wasn't taking her meds. (Plus everything with Frank, and I'll always say he's far worse!! But this isn't about him...) She has never experienced someone actually being able to live a good life with bipolar where they're not just hurting everyone around them. And of course she was getting frustrated, because even though logically she would've understood that Mickey just doesn't know anything about Bipolar, it likely felt like he was invalidating her trauma. ("Depressed? We all get fucking depressed." "He's depressed we'll cheer him up." "I'll hide the knives until he perks up.") Not only would that feel like he was just saying "it can't be that bad, you're overreacting and I can fix this." but also some of these things are likely things she'd thought or said about Monica when she was younger. Trying to cheer her up when she's depressed, trying to downplay it a bit to help herself deal. But she knows from experience that's not how it works. And she's terrified because now it's her little brother.

But she agrees to let Mickey take care of him. She can see how much this means to him, that he's determined and that he's not going to let her get him to a doctor. (Even though legally she could've as he was still underage and she was his legal guardian...)

And people also seem to think that the Gallaghers just abandoned Ian with the Milkoviches while he was depressed and didn't help out or anything, but the scene of her and Ian going for that run together doesn't feel that way at all to me. I've always felt they'd go to see him whenever they could and do what they could to help out. But at the end of the day, he was at the Milkovich house and they couldn't just be there at all times. (Just another criticism I see a lot that I hate...)

As I said in Lip's section, they go to see Mickey to talk to him about getting Ian to see a Doctor, and he refuses.

At the end of the episode when Ian shows up to their pool party Fiona immediately asks where Mickey is. Which means that she not only either extended the invite to Mickey to come too, or just assumed he would, but also cared enough to ask after him when he didn't show.

In episode 2, Mandy asks Mickey if they should call Fiona when Ian's planning to go kill a bunch of homophobes. (This unintentional foreshadowing to Gay Jesus though...) Mickey immediately says no because she'll take him to a Shrink. Again, I get that's scary, but that was what he needed.

Mickey finally calls her when Ian takes Yevgeny and she immediately goes over there and calls Lip too. She also doesn't lay any blame at Mickey's feet. There's no getting annoyed that he didn't listen to them when they warned him. Just need to find Ian.

She smiles when Mickey calls himself Ian's boyfriend in the next episode when they're going to visit him. She's comforting towards him when Ian leaves after the visit by assuring him that he's just sedated and adjusting to meds and that it'll be okay. But doesn't push. Then later tells Gus that she thinks it was really hard for Mickey.

Here's the part where she gets the most criticism though. "I thought Mickey would be here." "I didn't." THIS WAS NOT ANYTHING AGAINST MICKEY! She had seen how hard the visit was for him. She saw his reaction and how freaked out he was. This wasn't her saying "I didn't think he'd come because he doesn't actually care about Ian and he's the worst!" No! It was her saying "I didn't think he'd come because I saw how much it hurt him seeing him like that and haven't heard from him since." Also, she wasn't wrong. He wasn't there. Like, we know why. He was struggling with everything and that is understandable. But why is Fiona just so awful for believing something that turned out to be true?

Then of course Mickey came back and all was good. And Fiona wasn't surprised by that. She never held it against him that he wasn't there to pick Ian up. There was no animosity. He offered to help her out with Carl's Court outfit stuff, she just asked if he could use an iron and then they walked off together to go do that and possibly talk or whatever.

Then Mickey was still just walking about the house like it was his own after Ian was arrested. This was totally normal to Fiona. There was no question whether Mickey would be going with them to see Ian in Military Prison. When they got back she was fine with leaving him with Debbie and Liam as if it was totally normal.

And I spoke about her line in S7 about how Mickey would set a match to Ian's life in my last post. But I'll say it again here. It wasn't about Mickey as a person or his relationship with Ian. It was about the fact that Mickey was literally a fugitive. He'd just escaped Prison and was a fugitive. Ian could not have been in a relationship with him at that time without destroying his entire life. Without losing his job. Without losing his family due to the fact that he would also now be a fugitive and wouldn't be able to have contact with them. Going with Mickey would cost him everything. She was right. He would've set a match to Ian's life. And he kinda did. To me it was never about her thinking Mickey was bad for Ian. She knew how much they love each other and she saw how good for each other they could be. But at that point in time, they couldn't have had a good relationship. The circumstances were too bad. She didn't want that life for Ian. Constantly looking over his shoulder because the Police were looking for him, always on the run, never able to really see his family.

They didn't have many interactions, but a lot of them were during a time where both were terrified for Ian and wanted to handle it in different ways. Both came from places of love. But Fiona's also came from a place of experience, while Mickey's came from a place of inexperience.

[deus-ex-mona]

sena 🤝 yujiro

older siblings (who see themselves as unreliable) who look out for and love their (relatively aloof) younger siblings unconditionally

[hello-eeveev]

Okay okay I’ve seen some takes regarding Orym on twitter (specifically about his relationship to Laudna) that I feel the need to refute but I have a lot of thoughts and also I don’t want to get into fights so hi tumblr! rant below the cut 😊

(tl;dr I think the bell’s hells are doing the best they can in a series of complicated situations, but people are expecting a kind of inter-party conflict to come from it that doesn’t line up with the text and I don’t get it, so I guess I must become Orym’s #1 defender, feat. a defense of the c3e63 decision, Ludinus Da’leth hate, and big big feelings about Keyleth and Vax)

Take: Orym is uncomfortable with Laudna’s weirdness/creepiness, as evidenced by him always bringing it up and trying to hide and obscure her undead presence.

My opinion: Laudna loves the fact that she’s creepy. She revels in it. Orym/Liam pointing it out in narration is part flavor text, part acknowledging an important aspect of Laudna. It’s like how he always makes sure everyone knows that Orym is Small. Not to mention, Marisha brings it up in her narration as much as Liam does.

During Laudna’s resurrection ritual, Orym says, “I don’t know what Bell’s Hells will be without your darkness, Laudna. Or your light.” He values both sides of her!

Regarding Orym’s disguises for Laudna (i.e. dressing her in white in bassuras, adding flowers to her hair to give her more color in hearthdell), again I don’t think this is a sign of Orym’s discomfort with her. Remember, Orym is a bodyguard. His job is to protect others, protect the group. Yes, several members of Bell’s Hells will draw eyes, but notably, Laudna—being undead-ish, with the Unsettling Presence feature and a canonically scary physical appearance—might strike fear into others. And fear makes people more willing to resort to violence than, say, being surprised by the presence of a robot or a faun. It’s not about making her palatable, it’s about keeping all of them safe. It’s bodyguard behavior.

Also, Orym only does this when they are actively avoiding drawing attention to themselves, and as far as I know, Laudna has only had a problem with it once.

Take: Laudna looked to Ashton and Orym for what to do during the scuffle with Bor’Dor, and Orym encouraged her to let Delilah back in, all because he’s hell-bent on revenge and thinks he can use Delilah’s power to get it. He actively disregarded Laudna’s well-being to further his own goals.

My opinion: No, she wasn’t looking to them for what to do. Marisha said it herself: Laudna was barely present. She couldn’t even hear Deni$e suggest keeping Bor’Dor alive; what makes you think she’s going to see a singular nod from Orym 15 feet away? She had already done Hunger of the Shadow, was already cloaked in the “purple-ish glowing hue that hasn’t been seen in a while,” and Matt had mentioned the heartbeat long before Liam ever said anything. Laudna had already let Delilah back in before Orym nodded and before she killed Bor’Dor. It was a horrible situation all around, but Orym did not convince Laudna to let Delilah back in for his own purposes. It is not his fault that Laudna embraced Delilah’s power or that Bor’Dor died. Laudna made her choice, as heartbreaking and conflicting as it may be, so let her live with it.

And for the record, I think they were justified in killing Bor’Dor. He attacked them with a pretty powerful spell (he did Vitriolic Sphere at its baseline 4th level, which is the second highest level spell he had) and nearly killed Prism in the process. Yes, Bor’Dor did a bit of waffling back and forth between “I’m gonna kill you!” and “just let me die,” but him being a pathetic mess is nothing new. He still tried to kill them all. If they let him live, there was no guarantee he wouldn’t try it again.

I don’t know how to impress this upon people who haven’t already gotten it from just watching the show, but the Ruby Vanguard is a bad group. Ludinus Da’leth is a bad person. He may have convinced some members that his goals are noble, but they aren’t. He is misleading people for his own gain, because guess what? The concept of free will exists even with the existence of the gods! People are allowed to worship them or not, and the gods aren’t smiting people down for refusing to worship them (otherwise Keyleth would be long dead, y’all. she said out loud to the champion of the raven queen that they should use her power while it benefitted them and then find a loophole to get Vax out of her service. and she is so valid for that. 15/10 would do the same).

We had a PC, a dozen or so NPCs, and an entire arc last campaign—and then a whole 4-part series!—that dealt with wizard hubris and its unfortunate consequences. Ludinus was one of those NPCs! What makes you think that Mr. “let’s steal a holy artifact and instigate a war” “should try friends sometime” “Essek looks forward to never seeing his face again” “Trent Ikithon can keep abusing children it’s not my problem” Da’leth suddenly has people’s best interests in mind?

He and the Ruby Vanguard need to be stopped, and Orym, being a person whose driving motivation is “to protect,” is willing to do what needs to be done, even when it sucks.

Take: ooohoohoo Orym’s alignment might be shifting! We need Dorian to get him back on track!

My opinion: No? To both these statements? Firstly, Orym’s alignment isn’t shifting, at least I don’t think so. I’m not an expert on D&D alignments (I think they should be more descriptive than prescriptive/ultimately they matter less than character choices, arcs, and narratives), but I would guess that fighting to maintain the balance of nature and to stop those that would harm others for their own gain is still pretty in line with neutral good? I could maybe see an argument for that being more lawful good, but it didn’t seem like those people were talking about a shift along the horizontal axis.

Secondly, I think Dorian would do the exact same thing Orym is doing. Was that not the whole draw of the Spider Queen’s crown during ExU Prime? Power to protect and save his friends? So I don’t think Dorian would see anything wrong with how Orym is acting, much less take him to task over it.

Take: Look! Orym told Keyleth about Imogen’s mom and said “I don’t care” when Imogen complained! Bad! Mean! Selfish!

My opinion: idk that felt more like Liam being a brat to Laura than anything else.

Like, yes Liam/Orym had his own goals in that convo which were unexpected and uncomfortable, but I don’t think he was wrong to point that out. The moment Keyleth swore to take down Liliana, you could feel everyone in Bell’s Hells get really tense, and I am certain that Keyleth, who has 20 wisdom and ~30 years of experience leading her people and politicking, clocked that instantly. And Orym would have clocked that immediately, and in an effort to make sure that their group had the confidence of a very powerful druid and world leader, decided that full transparency was the way to go.

And I don’t know, this is largely speculation, but Keyleth having that information might mean that she will make sure Imogen doesn’t have to be the one to take down Liliana? Or it might make her more sympathetic and willing to show some mercy to her?

Leaning more fully into speculation bc this relies mostly on inference and assumption: while I do think that Keyleth deserves to know what’s going on with Vax, withholding that information at this juncture might have been another tactical decision from Orym. We don’t know how Keyleth has mourned over the last 30 years, but we know that she’s been angry and we know that losing Vax was and is devastating. I feel like finding out that the love of your life (“forever and ever and ever and always” “I’ll never get over you”) is suffering extreme torment such that the followers of his god are in a period of mourning, basically implying that you’ve lost him all over again, that potentially the one reassurance that you would see him again has been ripped from you, etc., etc. would cause anyone to break down on a good day. Add on the fact that Keyleth is gravely, gravely injured, and you’re basically asking for her to be completely out of commission, because 1) holy moly talk about new trauma, old trauma, grief, longing, guilt, etc. bro I’m an emotional wreck just thinking about Vax and I’m not the one living through it, and 2) that would be a lot of stress on her already extremely stressed body, the consequences of which could be very bad.

It’s a tough decision to make, and while I’m not sure I 100% agree with Orym’s, I think it’s a defensible position.

Anyway thanks for reading this far, I hope you enjoyed my analysis. Again, I don’t want to fight or get into arguments, but I’m down for some brief discussions! Emphasis on brief because I can fall into a rabbit hole very easily, which means this will be the only thing I can think of and I have other things I want to do, shadowgast to write, fearnechetney to draw, and this post already took several hours over two days to write after weeks of mental build up.

[thebrokenmechanicalpencil]

Beyond the stains.

( @quibble-auk some deep thoughts about the Horns and Razors au, when the triplets are older and decide things need to be done. Please tell me if this is odd, or wrong in any way I took some liberties with the pits and gladiators

Dropmix has no idea what he did when he told those stories.)

-

It was a cold night, those within the arena could feel it. The young gladiators of the pits however did not shy away from one another as they crept into long forgotten and un-cared for halls. Years after the death of Nova Prime the pits had seemingly loosened their leashes, those who fought within its walls escaped their handlers with ease. 

In slow swift movements they slipped and padded down the once open halls. They had never ventured there before the Righ showed them, his deep black eyes darting and secretive. “Tell no one, friends. These are old places.”

So the young bucks told not a soul, their band promising to not whisper a word. The world was crumbling and cracked, their claws once traced the old paintings that littered the walls looking in awe. Now they moved with silent purpose.

The elder of them, Thread, watched on with serious eyes. Keeping their passage quiet and skillfully closed when they all entered.

Varying in colors and swift, they didn’t speak a word. 

In half an hour they entered a crippled room, the rock walls alluding to a holding cell. Now forgotten or ignored by the masters in favor of stretching their limbs and new abundance of power over their arena.

Not all old masters were dead yet, but those left were eager to stretch their greedy digits.

Though the room was cold, it was not a room in which one would feel uncomfortable. Within the passage was a sanctuary, made only by the company kept there.

Ten or so other bucks clicked out happy greetings, foreheads were bumped in affection. Horns nudged in happy sighs of relief.

“You had a nice walk then? Did anyone see you?” One of the darker mechs muttered, his forehead firm against Thread’s own. Their horns had a similar shape, their sharp angled faces mirrored. “Of course no one saw us, don’t insult me little brother.”

“Why did Righ call us?” One murmured as cubes were passed around, rations had been shortened recently for the smaller framed gladiators. Without a large puppeteer the arena struggled with providing. But the gladiators had rather oddly begun to help one another, uncharacteristic of their violent frame type. The smaller mechs smiled and thanked the others with soft expressions and teasing remarks.

Any who peaked into the room would be shocked by the closeness of the band, the kindness and comradery exchanged. Most would assume such a group would divulge into violence and animosity at the drop of a pin.

“I don’t know, he- ha! Thank you, he said the snakes were talking.” Murmurs washed over the group,  tucked close to one another as the warmth from their frames heated the room. 

“That's always fun, maybe he’s- Shut up you idiot you can’t just blab everything.” Some of the older mechs nodded, their optics flashing. “Not even here.” The snap had some of the youngest bristling slightly, a tenseness stringing them.

“C’mon Tynis, he’s just young. You were once.” The voice was a whisper, gentle and soothing. All of the predatory optics flitted to the doorway, the blue mech in the frame lean and silent as he slowly entered the room.

As he entered he began to hum softly, a deep rumbling hum that had the youngest gladiators grinning. 

Everyone loved it when Somh sang.

It sent a ripple of greetings as he walked passed, the smaller mech chuckling past his hum as he was nudged and bumped in a hello.

He sat near the head of the circle, his hum deepening as he went. His long serpentine tail swayed as those who knew the words to the song began to hum as well. Soothing tones gently lowering plating and weakening any grudges that might have been forming. Soon all those that had the courage were humming softly.

Soon, his voice began. Leaping from the hum with the confidence of a flier. 

It was smooth and thick, a voice that would buy the loyalty of every mech who heard it. A gentle but firm hand in the world of claws.

The words were spellcasting and old, words if heard outside this room would have them all slaughtered. Even with the old lord dead, it seemed everyone was too frightened to grip the old ways and drag it back into the sun.

It sent a shiver down the younger mechs, as they tried their best to decipher the song. Others joined in, their varying voices hushed in the cold stone walls.

The choir of those who bathed in blood sang as though savoring every forbidden word. A good few knew what the words meant, only making their sparks burn brighter with the need to avenge. To relearn, to reclaim.

It sang of safe things, of how they were burnt. 

A song of the old world being set upon its block to be slaughtered.

Its blood had sprouted however, beneath the executioner’s axe it dripped and poured across the barren ground. 

Within the energon stains sat the remains of the culture that was a secret, a secret so well kept those who had it tucked away, grew too frightened to whisper of it.

The soothing voice of their Somh kept the rage at bay, an odd tendency it seemed to incite. His lullaby tones scratched an itch that none of the mechs knew they had. 

Another deeper rougher voice joined, Righ settling himself at the head of the circle. Heads bowed slightly as he smiled warmly at them all. Respect and love raising the confidence in their hums and utters. His red armour and black eyes were striking, as well as comforting.

So within the abandoned halls they sang, in the walls they were safe from the handlers and those who held their leashes. 

Not forever and not for long, but enough for all of them to allow themselves comfort. To learn and watch, as Somh told them stories.

Stories in that tied tongue, odd and shaky they learned it. An ache would begin in their chests the more they learned and gleaned. Something beyond the rage and bloodlust they had been told was the only part of themselves that mattered. Beyond their frames, who could be hurt and lashed.

The want for more.

[crossbackpoke-check]

thank you to @bhagell!! choose and then tag people you want to get to know better <3

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[binnybinnychickendinny]

goalies talking about goalie things in jan 11th's game against cbj <3

[lillotte17]

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