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dollfacefantasy · 7 months ago

Note

hiii i’m not sure if you particularly like writing hybrid!reader but can i pls request something with leon where he tries to feel out his bunny/dog hybrid gf’s kinks by seeing how her tail moves in response to them. like something she really likes she’ll wag her tail real fast and he finds it adorable

pairing: leon kennedy x fem!puppy-hybrid!reader

summary: leon plays with his precious puppy girl by watching her tail

cw: nsfw (18+), smut, humping his boot, daddy kink, praise kink, breeding kink, scent kink, dacryphilia, and size kink

word count: 2.6k

a/n: no because i love this idea so much. it's been in my head since i got it. i hope i did it justice because i think it's so cute. thank you for sending it and i hope you enjoy <3

Leon’s eyes rested upon his favorite sight in the whole world. His precious puppy girl kneeling at his feet. If he had to guess, he’d say it was your favorite place to be too. All signs pointed to that conclusion. Your eyes were wide and locked onto his face. Your body vibrated and squirmed with the urge to jump into his lap. And of course, the way your tail wagged back and forth.

Swish. Swish. Swish.

The fluffy appendage moves in a lazy rhythm right now. You were excited Leon was home and wanted to play, but you weren’t thrilled enough for it to turn to a blur. He chuckles and reaches a hand forward to rub your head. That gets it to speed up a little bit.

“You have a good day, pup?” he asks.

You scoot the slightest bit closer while nodding. You tilt your head to the side, squishing the flesh of your cheek against his knee.

“Yeah? What’d you do today?” he says.

“Took a nap. Watched the tv,” you answer, “You look tired, daddy.”

He smiles at your observation and scratches at the base of one of your ears. Those ears, which were perked up at the moment, were so sensitive to everything. The wind knocking something over outside, his car pulling up on the driveway, and of course, small changes in his inflection.

Though he sometimes wondered if that’s all it was. He sees the way your tail picks up a notch when his lips curl upwards with that smile. He wondered, if not hoped, that it was something more than just your heightened physical capabilities. If maybe, there was something within you, something deeper, some instinctive emotional connection that bound you to him. That was probably wishful thinking. Someone who understood him implicitly. Still that was how he felt sometimes, and it was always lingering in the back of his mind when he watched your cute little ass wiggle back and forth with the movement of your tail.

“A little. Had a long day at work,” he tells you, continuing the conversation.

“Oh. Was it boring?” you inquire.

“You could say that,” he says.

“I get bored sometimes when you’re not here too,” you say.

The short, curt way you speak drives him up the wall. His hand on top of your head trails down to your cheek and gives it a little pinch before his thumb lands on your lips. Your tongue darts out to give the pad a small lick.

“Cute,” he murmurs as his fingers descend to your jawline and then your throat, “Why were you so bored, puppy? You have the whole house to yourself. You have enough toys to fill a room.”

“But I was missing my favorite toy,” you say, nuzzling against his leg.

“Oh, your favorite toy, huh?” he says.

His fingers tease the edge of the smooth material that was wrapped around your neck. In place of a collar, you wore a pink satin ribbon. It bunched around to the front of your neck where it was tied in a pretty bow. Leon’s own handiwork. He never saw a reason to collar you. You were the most loyal little thing on the face of this Earth. Even if he kicked you out, you’d probably just take up residence on the mat at the front door. He’d rather you look like the spoiled princess that you were and dress you in the pink ribbon to match the other pink items you wore, your camisole and panties.

You nod at the question he asked, the ends of your bow swaying with your motion.

“Yeah? Well, tell daddy. What’s your favorite toy?” he prompts you.

Your hand snakes up to the front of his jeans and paws at the area where you would soon feel the outline of his hardening dick.

“That’s your favorite?” he asks, feigning ignorance, “Wow. If I'd known that, I wouldn’t have bought you all those stuffies. Coulda saved me a ton of money. Just let you sit on my cock most of the time, and you’d be satisfied.”

You shrug, not caring to roll that proposition around in your head for actual consideration. Sure you loved your toys, but they didn’t come close to one tucked away inside daddy’s jeans.

He grins not only because you’re so fucking cute, but also because he can see your tail starting to go faster. As much as he wants to pull you onto his lap and breed you till you’re a mess of drool and tears, he wants more tonight. You were nothing if not eager, and while he loved that, it meant that it didn’t take much effort from you to get him to cum in minutes. You’d just get so tight, you never suppressed any of your moans or whines, your face always scrunched up into needy expressions of euphoria…

Anyways. He just wanted to tease it out tonight.

“You have been a good girl today. I think you deserve some time with your favorite toy,” he says, watching the specific twitch when he said the two words of praise, “You wanna play with it right now?”

You nod almost as quickly as your tail wags. A sonorous laugh echoes from him. His eyes hold that glint that lets you know there’s more.

“What’s your favorite way to play with it, baby? You like bouncing on it?” he asks, his voice gaining an amused lilt.

You don’t respond with words. He knows your nodding, but his focus is on your backside where he’s getting the only response he needs.

Swish.

“Maybe you like taking it face down, whining into the pillow?” he continues.

Swish Swish.

“Or maybe you like being on your back, legs over daddy’s shoulders?”

Swish Swish Swish Swish Swish Swish Swish Swish Swish.

“I think that’s the winner,” he chuckles, “Why is that your favorite, pup?”

“It gets deeper,” you say. He watches as you try to be subtle about scooching closer. He wasn’t going to stop you though.

“Oh I see,” he says, nodding his head in mock realization, “You want it as deep as possible, right? And to do that, I have to pin you down, keep you underneath me where I can just fill that pussy up over and over. You like being helpless, princess?”

As his tone becomes more husky, you take your bottom lip between your teeth and nod. Your hips fight the urge to squirm, but your tail can’t stop flinging itself back and forth. A tingling flame had been lit inside your belly, one you desperately wanted him to put out.

“Yeah. You love when I’m in charge. You love when all you have to do is take it like a good girl, and you can just let that little brain melt away,” he taunts. With each swish of your tail, it’s like he can hear a game show buzzer ringing in his points.

You wrap your arms around his leg that was nearest to you and pathetically whimper out “daddy.”

“What is it, puppy?” he coos.

You look up at him and give him the definition of puppy eyes. “I want it. No more teasing,” you whine. Despite your demanding words, you stay put. You were a good girl after all, and good girls wait for permission.

“What? You want it?” he mocks, “What’s the rush, baby? You don’t like daddy’s voice anymore? You sure were liking it last night when you were all sleepy. Just whining and clinging onto me, begging me not to pull out.”

The movements of your tail start to become blurry as you remember the previous night. He’d fucked you so good and talked you through it the whole time. The main difference between now and then was that then you had his cock stuffed inside you while he spoke.

“I do like it,” you defend with a pout, “But I just want it, daddy. Please. Wanna be full of you.”

“Full,” he repeats, “Does daddy stretch you out? Make you feel like there’s no room for anything else?”

You nod again, but you can’t take it anymore. You scoot forward more so your knees rest on either side of his boot. His knee kisses the space beneath your chin while the rest of his leg is flush up against your tummy, going straight between your breasts. He knows what you’re about to do, but he’s fine with it. Tilting the tip of his boot upwards, he gives you silent permission to start rocking your hips.

That was all you needed to close the gap between the top of his shoe and your clothed cunt. Lowering yourself slightly, your puffy clit brushes the leather. You let out a tiny mewl. Your face was already starting to scrunch up into a cute little look from such a simple touch.

“That feel good, sweetheart?” he teases.

“Yeah, daddy. Thank you,” you whimper.

Your hips move back and forth as if on a pendulum. The rhythm is consistent like the pacing of your tail. Back and forth, back and forth.

“I think you soaked through your panties, pretty baby. You gonna get daddy’s shoe all nice and shiny? Make it smell like you?” he says with a smug grin.

“Uh huh,” you mumble.

But when Leon mentions scenting his boot, your tail starts going crazy. Absolutely buck wild. He wouldn’t be shocked if you sprained something from how hard it was moving. God, he was getting hard. A solid tent had formed in the center of his lap from watching you. So precious, so adorable. Those pants and whines of pure lust. The way your fingers were digging into the leg you held onto like you needed it to survive. The nonstop rutting of your hips matching up with the wag of your tail.

“Woah woah. Think my girl might be a little possessive,” he says as he watches you. He keeps his tone light. He wanted this to play out before he let himself have any. To stave off his desires, he palms himself over the rough denim.

Your eyes catch that, and it’s almost comical how you nearly drool. “I just want everyone to know you’re mine. You're my daddy. They can’t have you,” you say, nestling your face against his legs.

Your own pleasure builds in the pit of your belly. You’d found the perfect amount of pressure on his boot. You just had to keep grinding your aching cunt into the leather.

“Poor baby. No one’s gonna take me from you,” he croons and strokes your head. His hand moves so much slower than any of your body parts and the contrast intensifies the pleasure further.

“Good,” you say.

“Mhm. Trust me, you keep my hands full as is,” he jokes.

He watches as you keep whining and humping his boot. Your hips move like you’re on the clock. He can feel drool starting to drip on his jeans and dampen the fabric. If only he could see your eyes. He knows they’re getting glossy, hazy with the bliss coming from between your legs. Lucky for him, a particular jolt of ecstasy pulls your head back and ends with your face looking up at him.

“You’re getting to daddy’s favorite part, honey. Keep going, Keep being a good girl,” he says. Again, your tail jerks when it registers the magic words. You snap your hips with renewed fervor, chasing the elusive high. His fingers press down harder against his cock as he sees the gleam of saliva coating your chin and lips.

“When do we get to my favorite part?” you babble. Your voice was starting to give as the warmth of carnal pleasure encroaches on your mind.

“And what is your favorite part?” he asks, knowing what your answer would be.

“The part when I actually get your cock,” you whimper.

He shakes his head. “Look at you. Trying to be smart while you’re going dumb,” he teases, “Quit complaining. You’re still getting to feel good, aren’t you?”

“Yeah, but it’s not the same,” you whine instantly.

“Oh really? It looks pretty similar to me,” he says.

You make a small sound that’s halfway between a whine and a growl. Even with your frustration though, your hips don’t stop.

“I’m just teasing you, pup,” he says, stroking your jaw with his free hand, “I guess it is different. I don’t see you crying like you do when I’m buried inside. I don’t get to see those pretty eyelashes all wet from tears.”

Your eyes roll back at the mention of being so fucked out you cry. It was one of your favorites, and Leon knew it. Being reduced to a crumpled mess of sobs against the heat of his chest got you like almost nothing else.

The reactions etched across your facial features are cute, but he can’t tear his focus away from your ass moving against its will through the force of your tail.

“But that’s not the big difference, is it?” he continues, “No. The real reason you want my cock is cause you want daddy to breed you, huh?”

As soon as it leaves his mouth, it’s like his mental buzzer is letting him know he’s won the grand prize. Everything about you goes haywire. You lock around his leg while your hips rut like you’re in heat. Your tail whips around so fast he thinks it could create a breeze.

“Uh huh, daddy- ah! Mm… just wanna be bred. Need it,” you ramble.

He feels his cock twitching in his pants. He’s sure when he actually does get it in you, he’s not gonna last too long. It’s straining against the zipper as is, and he can’t stop rubbing it. He’s almost as bad as you on the boot.

“I know you do. Silly little puppy. That’s always what you need,” he coos, “Just need to be pumped full of cum. My sweet girl.”

Your tongue is half lolled out of your mouth by this point. You’re past going dumb. Your head is swimming around in absolute thoughtlessness. Not a care in the world besides getting yourself to cum all over daddy’s boot.

He nearly groans out loud from the sight of it. He can feel the warmth of your pussy all over his shoe, the plush of your thighs clamped near the sides.

“You’re doing perfect, baby,” he mutters, “You’re gonna get your treat, I promise. Just let daddy watch you cum, and I’ll make sure you get your fill.”

You want to whimper “ok, daddy,” but your mind is too far gone for words. All that comes out is a strangled amalgamation of sounds accompanied by your head wobbling up and down. And the whole time swish swish swish.

Your swollen little clit had more than enough stimulation to get you to burst. Pants turn to gasps and fluid movements sharpen. You mumble against his leg, your lips squishing all over his pants and wetting them even more with your spit.

“That’s my good girl,” he purrs, which is enough to get another loud moan out of you. He chuckles and continues watching with his half-lidded, lustful eyes.

As the movement of your hips slow, your tail’s swings weaken. He still strokes your head as you catch your breath. Your chest puffs in and out while you feel your skin cooling down. It was hard not to get sleepy after you came, but before you have to worry about falling asleep at his feet, Leon scoops you up and holds you on his lap.

Rubbing your back, he presses some kisses to your forehead and temple. “There’s my girl. How’re you feeling, baby?”

“Good, daddy,” you mutter against his shirt.

“Yeah? You think you’re up for daddy breeding you for real now?” he whispers.

And suddenly, you’re not so sleepy. You sit up straight in time with your ears perking up. You nod and give him a lazy smile. He can’t see it, but he can feel that tail already starting to wag again.

#leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x y/n #leon kennedy x you #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy smut #resident evil x reader #resident evil smut #resident evil imagines #resident evil x you

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ohsc · 4 months ago

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₊˚⊹♡ in another life | sam winchester x reader

a/n - first time doing a full fic with a pretty layout!!! i got the idea for this fic yesterday and got most of it out tonight i just loved the idea, i kinda hate the ending but i never write endings well so :/ if you like the fic pls pls reblog / tell me what you thought, it helps!! <3

cws - fem!reader, 2.5k words, mentions of nightmares, mentions of memory loss, blood, injury, destiel included, hurt/comfort, angst

other fics can be found on my masterlist

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

Blood. So much blood. She could feel as it trickled down her arms, warm against her cold skin.

The rope rubbed into her wrists painfully.

A gag in her mouth that made her panic.

She twisted, tried her hardest to get out, but it wouldn’t budge.

Thump-thump, thump-thump, her heart raced in her chest, panic crawled out from inside her ribs, up into her esophagus, out of her mouth until she screamed—

Her eyes snapped open and she jumped, hands splayed out beneath her to quickly shove herself to sit up, thump-thump, thump-thump-

“Hey, hey, you’re okay.” Sam’s voice broke through the panic and her eyes quickly snapped to him, shirtless and sleepy in the bed beside her.

In the bed.

She’d been dreaming.

Her breath shuddered as she inhaled and shifted a little, pressed her back against the headboard behind her as she forced herself to recognise her surroundings; Sam — who grounded her the most out of anything, the same four walls of their bedroom, the same clothes hung over the desk chair, his boots by the door, her books on the dresser. She’d had nightmares for so long — it was only natural given their way of life. She’d developed a way to deal with them over the years.

“Hey,” Sam’s hand was warm as he touched her shoulder, and she looked back up at him, his hair tousled from sleep, eyes ever so soft. Sometimes she didn't think she deserved him. “Are you okay?”

One of her hands moved up and took his, laced their fingers until all of their knuckles were kissing, and only then was it easier for her to breathe. “Yeah,” she sighed, smiled slightly. “M’okay, sorry.”

“No, hey,” Sam frowned a little and shifted closer, his free hand lifted to cup her cheek. “Don’t apologise. Sure you’re okay?”

She nodded, leaned into his palm. His skin was so warm that it felt heavenly. “S’nothing I haven’t dealt with before.”

He still looked worried, that little crease between his eyebrows hadn’t left his features, but Sam nodded anyways. He leaned forwards and closed the distance, and the soft press of his lips against hers cured any leftover anxieties from her nightmare.

The kiss transitioned from a soft press to a loving neediness, Sam had one of her lips between his own, his hands splayed on her waist, and like muscle memory she climbed into his lap so she could be closer. His hands were gentle, his breath warm as it fanned out over her face, and when she pulled back to look at him it—

It was nine o’clock.

Her eyes had caught the digital alarm clock beside the bed and her eyes widened a little, a surge of panic within her as her hands slipped from his cheeks to rest on his chest. “Shit, Sammy it’s nine.”

“Yeah?”

She frowned at him. “We should’ve been up ages ago, aren’t we working a case today?”

Sam frowned at her, took a breath, before he murmured softly, “Are you sure you’re okay, sweetheart?”

“What?” She just blinked, confused.

“You said we’re going on a case.”

“Yeah?”

Sam’s frown only deepened. “Baby, we haven’t been on a case in months.”

She just stared at him for a moment. Her eyes flickered over his expression, caught no sign that he was trying to mess with her. It was almost like he was serious.

But he couldn’t have been. Just last night they’d been talking about working a case in Indiana, that’s where they were supposed to be heading. They’d been working back-to-back cases for weeks, now. She was exhausted from them.

“What are you talking about?” She shook her head. “Just last night we… we’re going to Indiana today, Sam.”

Sam sat up completely and rubbed his palm over her back. “That dream really messed you up, huh?”

She scowled. “I’m being serious.”

Immediately he softened, apologetic to the core as he stroked her back again. “I know- I know, I’m sorry, sweetheart, it’s just… we really haven’t been on a case in weeks. The only thing we have planned today is going to catch that movie with Dean and Cas, remember?”

They had never gone to see a movie together, not in a proper cinema. Movie nights were slotted in at the bunker whenever they had time. “No, we have a case.”

He looked so concerned she almost felt bad. But she was so confused, they definitely hadn’t so much as stopped hunting for two days, let alone for months. What was he talking about?

“Okay…” Sam nodded slowly, though he clearly didn’t believe her. “Okay. Why don’t we go get you something to drink, okay?” It was clear he still thought it was the nightmare messing with her, and though she knew it wasn’t, she just nodded and let Sam guide the two of them out of bed. There was no point sitting there and arguing about it, he clearly didn’t believe her and she knew he wasn’t right.

She pulled on some pyjama pants whilst Sam tugged on a shirt, and with his hand against her lower back — she could practically feel the worry that vibrated beneath his skin — they walked through the bunker to the kitchen.

Her head was almost spinning. It was just so… strange. If Dean was the one telling her all this she would’ve known he was just messing with her, but Sam? The whole time they’d dated he’d never done something like this, and to be honest, he really wasn’t that good of an actor, anyways.

She didn’t know what was going on, but she knew that she was right.

They walked into the kitchen together, but half a step through the doorway she froze — Dean and Cas were sat at the table together, making out.

“Oh my god!” Her hand covered her mouth as she stood there in shock — because never in a million years had she thought that either of them would confess to each other — and her sounded surprise jolted the two of them out of it, their heads turned to look at her and Sam.

“Really, guys? We all have to eat there.” Sam grumbled as he walked to get a glass to fill with water.

Cas looked apologetic whilst Dean just smirked. “So?”

She was still just stood in the doorway, eyes wide, when Dean finally looked at her.

“What? Were you enjoying the show?”

“I- what? How long has this been a thing?” She blurted out, and Dean just stared at her.

“Huh?”

Sam stepped away from the counter when she’d asked her question, and that frown was back on his face again. “Sweetheart, they’ve been dating for a month,” his words were laced with worry, worry for her. “Are you feeling okay? Why don’t you sit down-”

“What are you talking about?” Her eyes flickered between the three men, and it felt like she was being gaslight. If it wasn’t for the genuine concern in Sam’s eyes, she would’ve thought that was what was happening. “They’ve not been together for a month.”

“A month and four days.” Cas told her.

“No you haven’t!” She was shouting now, because she just- she didn’t understand. It was scaring her.

Thump-thump, thump-thump.

“Baby, please sit down.” Sam murmured, tried to guide her to sit, as the other two men stood from the table.

“What’s going on?” Dean asked, his concern matched Sam’s, and she was so close to just ripping her hair out in frustration.

“This,” she gestured between them all. “Whatever this is, you’re all lying, okay? We worked a hunt yesterday, and you two,” she pointed to Dean and Cas who were holding hands, “are not dating!”

Thump-thump, thump-thump, the drumming was in her ears, she felt too worked up.

Castiel let go of Dean’s hand and stepped forwards. “Y/N, have you had a fall recently? Could you have possibly hit your head?”

Immediately she felt angry. “I’m not crazy-”

“I’m not calling you crazy,” Cas immediately assured her, and as she glanced between the three men she hated the way they were all looking at her, like she was some kind of sick dog. “It just seems like you’re presenting symptoms of memory loss, which could be the result of a head injury.”

She blinked, took a few shaky breaths. “I’m fine-”

“Baby, you fell getting out of the shower yesterday,” Sam sounded so pained it made her heart throb. He was so serious, the look in his eyes, she’d seen it hundreds of times before, at the occasion of one of her hundreds of injuries. “I got you painkillers and everything.”

Thump-thump, thump-thump, she felt like her heart was about to burst out of her ribs. Was she really…?

“May I?” Her eyes snapped back to Cas as he stepped forwards, lifted a hand, and she hesitated before she nodded. If anybody was going to squeeze the truth out of the situation, it would be Cas.

He stopped in front of her and lifted up his hands, and with the upmost gentleness he pressed the tips of his fingers against her temples. She watched as his eyes flashed blue, and it felt like her head had been dipped in ice water as his grace wormed through her head. He was so concentrated, lips set in a hard line, eyebrows scrunched downwards. She’d watched him do this so many times to others, but it hadn’t happened all that often to herself.

When Cas pulled back and his eyes were back to their usual shade of blue, he frowned. “It’s memory loss.” He murmured, and it felt like everything had started tipping.

Thump-thump, thump-thump, blood rushed in her ears as she took a shuddering breath, and Sam’s hand caught her elbow before she toppled backwards into the wall.

“Okay okay, easy, sweetheart,” Sam gripped her elbow a little tighter, and guided her over to the bench, sat her down with ease. “It’s okay, it’ll be okay-”

“Memory loss,” the words that came out of her mouth were mortified, she sounded almost scared. “I can’t-”

“Take a moment, take a breather.” Dean chimed in, and when she looked up all three of them were stood over her. If not for the situation it would’ve been a bit funny.

Sam had said they hadn’t been hunting in months, so she’d lost, what, at least three months?

Thump-thump, thump-thump.

“Cas, can you do anything?” Sam had turned to the angel, and she hated how panicked he sounded.

Thump-thump, thump-thump.

Castiel took a breath. “It’s not like a physical injury, it’s mental, it’s in her head, I’m not sure I can-”

Thump-thump, thump-thump, thump-thump—

Her vision had blacked out a little by the time she tipped forwards and fell off of the bench, folded like wet paper, like she physically couldn’t hold herself up. Through the fuzz in her head, she heard them call her name, felt hands on her arms, on her face. She’d blacked out a few times before, the feeling wasn’t foreign.

When her eyes finally opened again, it was dark.

“Y/N? Hey- hey- Sam she’s awake!” She was just able to make out Dean’s face in the dark.

When most of the fuzz in her head had subsided, the first thing she noticed was that she wasn’t on the floor, she was upright. The second thing she noticed was that her wrists really hurt.

Thump-thump, thump-thump, her heart was racing in her chest, in her ears, she could feel it in her wrists, a horrible throbbing that almost left her disoriented.

Her head tipped back a little unsteady, eyes up, and she quickly realised that her arms were yanked up above her head, rope dug painfully in her wrists which kept them there, her feet weren’t even on the floor.

Her head lulled forwards again, it felt so heavy, she was barely able to keep her eyes open. She tried to speak, but the third thing she realised was that something was in her mouth — a gag.

“Fuck- here, hang on,” Dean reached up and around her head, untied the fabric until he pulled it out of her mouth. “There you go.”

She inhaled shakily, eyelids fluttered. “What…”

“Sweetheart?” Hands cupped her face, and she didn’t need to look to know that this time it was Sam. “Oh god- Dean cut her down, I’ve got her.”

The hands moved to her waist, and after a moment the strain on her arms was snapped and she all but fell into waiting arms. Her body felt so weighed down and sore, she couldn’t protest as she was shifted and guided to rest on the floor.

“Y/N?” Warm hands were back on her cheeks. “Hey, can you look at me? C’mon baby, please-”

With far too much effort her eyelids fluttered again, and Sam was hovered over her, face scrunched in worry.

“Hey, there she is, we’ve got you,” his fingers stroked her cheek. “Are you with me?”

She forced herself to blink a few more times before she finally glanced around the room, and realised that they weren’t in the bunker — in fact, she had no idea where they were. The room was practically falling apart, old and dusty and broken. There was barely any light in the room, but she saw Dean stood over them worriedly, before her eyes flickered back to Sam.

“What… I don’t-” She felt so disoriented, it was scaring her.

“It’s okay, you’re okay,” he stroked her cheek again before he leaned in, and pressed his lips to her forehead. “Scared the life out of me.” He breathed into her skin.

When he pulled back, she looked down at herself, and the sheer amount of blood that had trickled down her arms made her feel nauseous. What the fuck?

Sam met her eyes, must’ve recognised the confusion, and his worried frown deepened into something more pitiful. “Djinn,” he told her softly. “Must’ve gotten to you when we split up. I’m so sorry, baby, I won’t let that happen again, okay?” Sam brushed his thumb along her cheekbone. “It’s dead. We killed it. You’re okay.”

Djinn. Of course. She’d always wondered what it would be like.

Only when Sam was certain that she was alright to move, both he and Dean helped her up and out of the building. None of them said much as they got to the car, Sam helped her into the backseat as Dean packed up the trunk, and then they were on the road.

Her arms were covered with dried blood, her wrists sore and bloodied, her mind reeling. That was her paradise?

They’d been in silence for a little while when Dean finally asked, “So what did you see?”

Her eyes flickered between the brothers. They were both bloodied and bruised, as was she. The car smelled like leather and gunpowder. Sam was messing with a switchblade in his lap. There a gun on the seat beside her. Nothing about it was peaceful.

She swallowed thickly, eyes shifted to look out of the window, and murmured softly, “We got out.”

#sam winchester #sam winchester x reader #sam winchester x y/n #sam winchester x you #sam winchester fluff #sam winchester imagine #sam winchester drabble #sam winchester oneshot #sam winchester fic #sam winchester fanfiction #supernatural #supernatural x reader #supernatural one shot #spn #spn x reader #spn one shot

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miwiheroes · 3 months ago

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Light = Truth

So this whole Byler post is literally just based off something that my friend who has a studies film at school said to me about lighting. Me and my friends do a presentation night like every few months and obviously my hyperfixation atm is byler so I did '10 reasons why I think byler could be canon'. My friends were convinced by the end btw, which is fun (and they kept pointing out yellow and blue things afterwards i loved life), but they also contributed so many things that I have never even considered or seen on byler tumblr before.

For example, my friend who studies film (btw we aren't just kids who like movies or smth, we are adults studying film lmao), stopped me during my presentation because I wasn't talking about lighting choices that were super clear.

I guess you can take what they said with a grain of salt because they aren't like, a professional ig, but they said that so many times during film, light is symbolic to mean truth. And it's like... oh my god. Suddenly, after they said that, everything made sense. Of course, light means truth in all these scenes! So I just want to point out two Byler/ Mike is gay moments that I think are related to this:

Light in the Closet tm

Hello??? Why is there a light in the closet here, not just to draw ur attention towards it, but also to symbolise something. Who tf has a light in their closet unless its massive, and why would it even be on in this scene?

The truth is, you're in the closet, Michael. We've all seen these images before and how he has his eyes open, yada yada, but the light literally means truth here, and its framed on his head, like he's thinking of the truth.

In literally the first scene in season 4 with Mike, as we know, we see a closet. That's almost comical. Not only that, but the light is on. Meaning, the truth is, Mike's still in the closet, again it's framed near his head. (Pair this with the one way sign, it's very obvious what they're trying to say here)

Let's talk about this image right here:

First of all, the light is literally shining out of the closet, not just in a blurry fashion, but it's literally a ray of light pointing at Mike who's standing in front of it. This being in the very first scene with Mike in it sets up the sort of arc he has in season 4, the fact that the truth is he's in the closet, but the one way sign shows he's still in it.

I showed this image to my friends during the presentation and the one I mentioned earlier also said that the set designers put the lamp where it is for a reason as well. The lamp in Mike's room is, of course, lighting up Will's drawings on his notice board as well as the buff guy posters. So, his true feelings are that... he likes men. Yah

2. Lights on Will

In the Van scene, everyone knows about how they spent a reallyyyy long time getting the lighting just correct, and if it was meant to mean truth, it all makes sense. (Also to get that heart in Will's eye lmao)

In this shot, (not particularly this frame but yknow) Will is literally bathed in sunlight, and it could just mean that Mike's seeing him in this light because he's pretty to him or something, or it could mean that Will's literally telling the truth/ Will is Mike's truth. Playing D&D and Nintendo for the rest of their lives is really what he wants, as established in season 3.

(my fave byler scene yes pls) When I showed this photo to my friends in my presentation, my film studies friend literally laughed. Yes, it is very very clear what they are trying to tell viewers here. The light is purposefully shining perfectly on Will only. Mike is completely cut off from the light and is in the dark. Some think that it's because he's 'in the dark about Will's feelings' (and yeah he is) but I think it's because by the end of season 4, Will has kind of admitted the truth to himself. He loves Mike, but Mike hasn't admitted his truth, that he loves Will.

However, we get clear foreshadowing for the next season in this scene because:

Mike reaches into the light, for the truth. It also foreshadows him supporting Will more in season 5 perhaps, but the fact that the next shot is this:

kind of just makes it super duper obvious that he's going to (very cheesy but) 'find his truth' or true feelings with Will/ in the next season.

Okay thanks for listening to me ramble about how light = truth, i would love to hear any other moments that could also mean the same thing :) Anyways, byler endgame.

#byler #byler endgame #byler proof #byler evidence #stranger things #cinemetography #oh im deep in this hyperfixation now

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cry4mina · 1 month ago

Text

Pomegranate

(Jeongyeon x fem!reader)

Word Count: 6.3k

Angst/Smallest drop of fluff

Summary: Jeongyeon was coming home from tour and you were going to propose but she comes home later than expected and throws a wrench in your plans.

TW: ANGST. Alcohol and lots of it, throwing up, sad, big sads, panic attacks, the big sads, screaming, mentions of blood (it's in once sentence), food, uh...yeah angst.

A/N: Me 3 days ago: i'm not doing birthday fics. Me right now, HAPPY EARLY JEONGYEON DAAAAAAY! Have a not so happy moment to celebrate! I decided I was going to attempt to do one for her and Momo before I moved soooo ta daaaaa (it's been so long since i've written angst, i'm rusty pls forgive me) @psylocke142 helped me find pictures and let me yap about this (also read it before I posted it to make sure it wasn't ass) <33 thank u fren!

Everyone pls stay safe and have a lovely daaaaay<3

After weeks of preparation and consulting with Jihyo virtually, you were finally ready to ask your girlfriend of 4 years to marry you. Picking up all the components, you rushed home to get ready for what was going to be one of the best days of your life.

Tonight’s the night!

The house is set up perfectly, rose petals from the front door to the living room, a bouquet of roses on the table that are blooming, candles everywhere, and you’re in a brand new fully tailored suit that fits you like a glove.

Preparing dinner was the most tedious part of this. While Jeongyeon was on tour for a few months, you took it upon yourself to take some classes to master her favorite dish so you could make it from scratch for tonight. Even taking it a step further and asking her mother for the recipe she used when Jeong was a child.

Dinner is ready in the kitchen, you check your watch to see it’s 7:13pm. Jeongyeon should be walking through the door any minute, flight having landed an hour ago- she texted you when she landed saying that she was dropping Jihyo off and heading home.

Time sludges on, 7:45pm, still no sign of her.

Then it’s suddenly 8:30pm.

Every minute feels like an hour of nothingness.

No call

No text.

Nothing.

You: I hope everything is okay…let me know when you’ll be home. [9:01pm]

You: I love you. [9:01pm]

Walking into the kitchen, you decide to pack dinner up. Putting all the food in Tupperware and stacking it in the fridge in portions for when your girlfriend got home.

Hopefully, your soon to be fiancé would hurry back to you.

Reaching into your pocket, you pull out the suede box and pop it open, revealing a classic square shaped diamond on a gold band.

Taking in the sparkle of the gem, you reminisce on your favorite memories together. All the soft, tender, silly moments you had with your loving girlfriend and wishing she was here so you could just ask her to spend forever with you.

Checking your phone to see no response from Jeongyeon, you sigh and frown. She usually updated you with what she was up to, so this was out of character for her.

Especially, under the circumstances, she usually hurried home to you.

It had been months since you’d seen her, since the tour was taking up most of her time. It was easy to be impatient. Even with FaceTime dates, phone calls, texts - it wasn’t the same as having her with you. Being able to hear her laugh outside of a speaker and feeling her warmth against you as you slept instead of falling asleep together through a screen.

Taking a seat on the couch and kicking your feet up on the table, you lull off into a peaceful sleep with happy memories of the two of you replaying in your mind's eye.

—

The latching of the door rings in your ears, you hear light footsteps through the hall and into the kitchen.

A deep sigh seeps tension into the atmosphere of your home. The tapping of nails on the counter makes your eyes slingshot open.

She’s home.

Jumping up and almost losing your balance, you grab the roses and bolt into the kitchen to see a teary-eyed Jeongyeon standing there, leaning against the counter.

“Baby? What’s wrong?” immediately putting the flowers on the counter and walking out to hold her.

Jeongyeon halts your movements with a single hand up, palm facing you to stop you in your tracks. Her eyes never leave the floor. Confusion tenses your shoulders and back, concerned at not only the gesture but her demeanor and emotional state.

“Jeongyeon…what’s going on?” the soft nervousness of your tone makes her wince at the words spoken.

“We need to talk.” she’s still unable to look at you. Eyes tracing the grout on the tile, looking for literally anything but you to focus on. Tears trailing down her cheeks, she’s trying to collect herself.

“Okay..?” hopping up onto the counter and placing your hands within themselves, you patiently wait for her to say what she needs to.

“I’m…not happy.” stumbles its way off her tongue and into the air.

The flavor is putrid and sour.

There’s an ache building in your chest, brain and heart trying to process the words you just heard her say.

“…what do you mean?” Unable to grasp what she’s just spoken.

Unhappy?

“I…don’t want to do this anymore. I feel bad being away for so long and it really hurts both of us when you say how much you miss me. I can’t expect for you to just wait around for me to come home all the time. It’s not fair to either of us.” Voice shaking as she explains herself.

Weighed down by a devastating ton of bricks that build the foundation of this relationship, you slide off the counter. Your eyes not leaving her face for the time it takes to approach her.

Watching as your stability crumbles underneath you. You can’t believe this is what she’s saying…

“Jeongyeon…baby, I’d take missing you over being with anyone else…any day. In any life. You’re my everything…” hands now on her forearms, trying to make eye contact so she can see how much care you have for her.

“I’m sorry.” whispered to you through tears.

She still can’t even look at you.

The cracks through your chest are loud enough to make the earth shatter. Lightning shoots through your veins, flashes of heat that immediately run cold inside you.

Trying to make sense of all this as fight, flight or freeze kicks in, you leave the room.

Walking into the living room, you sit on the couch you had just dozed off on. Head in your hands, sobbing into them violently, a physical reaction to your heart being ripped from your chest.

Not even noticing her stepping into the room, you continue to let out the devastating wail, trying to ease the emptiness in your chest from the abrupt pain it was now experiencing.

Her sniffling pulls you out of your hands.

Looking up to see her with matching tears flowing down her cheeks.

Standing up, you pick up the box of tissues on your shared coffee table and hand them to her. She offers a half smile before taking one, you don’t return the gesture.

“Can you tell me what I did?” Through the shivering as you try to regulate your emotions.

“What? What you did?” Jeongyeon is confused by this question, dabbing her tears from under her eyes and trying to compose herself.

“Yes, what did I do to make you want to leave?” Looking her in the eyes and waiting for the reasoning.

“I…I’m sorry, I have to go.” Grabbing her keys and bolting for the door.

Never offering a response, or even a glance back. She left you to your own devices that night in your once shared apartment.

—

3 months later and you can still hardly take care of yourself. The agony of her not being with you, completely ruining every day you’ve had.

Work was always slow and dreadful, not offering any reprieve from the weighted down linger of what was no longer in your life. Leaving you all the time in the world to ruminate and try to make sense of everything that happened.

The scene of her leaving the house that night played in your head over and over again, like a nightmare that never stopped. A broken record that continued to spin, playing the same tune until your ears bled.

Getting mail for her everyday ruined you. Seeing her name on the letters was just detrimental, a reminder around every corner - the entire house coated in the same layer of hopeless despair you found yourself in.

You didn’t even know where she was staying or what her day to day was like. Always wondering if she was feeling these aftershocks of your split.

Turing to alcohol to ease the feelings, you drank alone until you passed out every single night. Blaring music and singing at the top of your lungs while heavily intoxicated was an escape, but it was only temporary.

Isolating was something you did well, never really wanting to let the world know how you were suffering. Jeongyeon was good at pulling you out of that but…she wasn’t here anymore.

Turning down every picture in the house of the two of you together, you were no where near ready to get rid of them no matter how much they hurt to see.

They were little glimpses into the past…tiny portals into a happier time and it was devastating to think she might not share that sentiment. Most of you free time spent on the questions of whether or not she ever actually loved you and whether or not you would see her again.

—

One drunken night, your phone rang. The vibrating against the table startled you out of your dissociated drunken state that was practically slumber.

Picking it up without being bothered to read who was calling, you put your half empty bottle of whiskey down on the table and answer the phone.

“H- hiccup-hello?”

“Hey Y/n! It’s been so long since I’ve seen you. How are you doing?” The voice is immediately recognizable.

“I’m alive, Jihyo. If that’s what you’re wondering.” The sulking was dripped off your tone, knowing this was your ex girlfriend’s best friend brought up too many feelings for you, very aware that whatever you told Jihyo would be passed on to…her.

“I was wondering…but I wanted to check in with you.” Her tone seems saddened, worried and hesitant to ask what she really wanted to.

Knowing she was aware of the plan to propose and encouraged you to do it, helping you organize everything - including getting Jeongyeon to the house when you needed her there for the perfect surprise, you had a bond with Jihyo that was strong and she knew that you were not okay.

She couldn’t have known the internal workings of Jeongyeon’s mind, though she did tell her everything. No one expected you two to ever break up in their wildest dreams.

You were meant to together.

Or so you and everyone else thought.

“I’m alive. That’s really all I have to shhay.” Slurring your responses to her, unintentionally.

“Y/n…are you drunk?” Concern now lacing her voice even stronger than before, she knows you’re not much of a drinker so this was worrisome to her.

Hearing keys rattling on the other side of the phone, assuming that Jihyo was about to head over to your house - you shut that down, quickly. Not wanting to see her or even entertain the thought of pretending like you weren’t in the depths of your own dejection.

“I’m fine, Jihyo. Just let me shhuffer in peace.” Hanging up and putting the phone back down on the table.

It vibrates for at least 15 minutes, you choose to ignore the buzzing and take another long swig from the bottle of whiskey. Who needs a glass when you’re just going to drown in your own tears anyway?

Your world lost it’s light. There’s no reason to pretend like you gave a shit about anything, nothing was worth caring about now that she was gone. Yourself included.

A hard knock on the door startles you out of your thoughts.

Looking at the clock, it’s 1:27am.

Who the fuck is at your door?

“Go -hiccup- away!” followed by another swing from the bottle, stinging your throat as it slips down to your stomach.

“Y/n, open the door or I’m coming in!” A stern tone comes through the solid wood that is all too familiar for all the right reasons.

“You and -hiccup- what army?” Standing up and almost falling over but catching your balance on the arm of the couch.

The lock clicks open, knob turning quickly and the door flew open, smacking against the wall to reveal…

Her…

Jeongyeon.

Steppping in to see the house in shambles, she takes in the empty bottles of alcohol everywhere, garbage and empty plates and cups all over the coffee table and the mess that was you, standing next to the wreck with your bottle gripped tightly.

Sighing at the sight, she closes the door behind her and sets her stuff down on the counter in the kitchen. Jeongyeon scans the house, looking around to find any semblance of your old happy life. Seeing the picture frames turned down stops her in her tracks, flipping her favorite on up and leaving it.

“What -hiccup- are YOU doing here?” Slurring and pointing at her before plopping down on the couch, glaring at her for fixing the pictures, not wanting to remember the good times because there wasn’t a light at the end of this tunnel, as far as you’re concerned.

Trying to take a swing from your whiskey, she runs over and snatches the bottle out of your hand.

“HEY! -hiccup- That’s mine! Get your own! I don’t want to share with -hiccup- you.” Reaching for the container again, only for her to push you down by your chest back to the couch, brows furrowed in a mix of confusion and disgust.

“Sit down! I can’t believe the mess this place is…what’s gotten into you?” The anger in her voice shakes the frame of your soul, snapping you as far sober as your body would allow.

“I…don’t think you care anymore.” Tears fall unstoppably, coating your eyes and cheeks with pure grief and misery.

Jeongyeon’s face is made of stone, stoic in nature and unmoving as you cry. This causes you to break completely. Maybe she never really cared…

Laying down on the couch and rolling over to face the back of it, trying to hide your descent into the pit of despair that you were trying to pull yourself out of everyday but with her reactions, she pushed you deeper unknowingly.

You lacked the will to keep up your strength, yet you persisted in your attempts, even if they were futile. Refusing to showcase how thoroughly this had devastated you. It consumed you entirely.

The experience gnawed at your bones, turning your world upside down, leaving behind only a hollow shell of what once was—every trace of love you held for her and for yourself, devoured in its wake.

“Y/n…” the tinge of sadness in the way she said your name caught your attention but you were still stuck in the void and didn’t want to turn over to look at her.

“Y/n…come on…” sitting down at the bend of your legs, rubbing your back in a familiar act of comfort.

“Don’t do that.” Harshly spat at her through gritted teeth, scooting closer to the inside of the couch and farther away from her so she would get the hint and taker her hand off you.

“Y/n…look, I’m sorry okay…I know I shouldn’t have come…I was just worried about you. I heard you slurring and I know you don’t really like to dri-“

“You HEARD me?” Rolling over with fury leaching from your eye to see the shock on her face. She had given herself up and the realization already set in, even though you were inebriated.

“…did you make Jihyo call me to check up on me?” Glaring at her in disbelief, anger boiling in your chest as you waited for her to say something.

Jeongyeon stammers, looking for a good excuse as her eyes shift from left to right. She opens her mouth to try and but ends up just looking at the ground…unwilling to tell the truth even having been caught.

“Get out.” Standing up too quickly and almost falling to open the door for her.

“Y/n, please just let me explain.” Begging for a moment of your time so she can try to fix this.

“You have 2 minutes -hiccup- and then I never want to shhee you again.” Voice cracking as you try to stand by yourself, wobbling and stumbling over to the door, gripping the knob to steady yourself.

“Can we please talk about this when you’re sober? I think that would be better than trying to have a conversation when you’re like this…” Jeongyeon motions her hands at you, tears welling up in her eyes at the disheveled state she found you in.

Taking your hand off the door, you turn around and face her. Letting the tears fall freely from your eyes, taking off the mask you wore to try and hide the suffering. Trying to wipe the destress from your face as you formulate your sentence.

“What’s wrong, Jeongyeon?” stepping up close to her with a frigid demeanor and a spiteful scowl that contradicts the droplets of emotion that fall from your eyes as you step closer to her, inches from her face, giving the final blow.

“Having trouble facing me? Or do you just not like the way you found me?” sniffling through the ending of that sentence, you stumble off to your once shared bedroom, leaving Jeongyeon in the living room by herself.

Falling onto the bed, you rip off your shirt, bra and pants and curl up on her side of the bed. The room starts to spin as you finally laid still and the alcohol took over again. Moaning and groaning to yourself as the minutes pass.

It hits you all at once, the overwhelming sensation of being wasted, the fact that your ex was in the house and the anxiety that ran your life all clashing to create a wave of nausea that you could not escape.

You struggle to get to the bathroom, knocking stuff over on the way before finally sitting down in front of the toilet and purging your stomach.

Retching all the toxic fluid out of your body takes an hour or so. Dizzied by your drunken state, dehydration, and sorrow, you’re unable to stand so you just sit and wait for it to pass like a bad thunder storm.

A small knock at the door, startles you out of a sleep that you hasn’t realized you slipped into while waiting for the room to stop spinning against your will.

“Y/n?…Are you alright?” softly spoken from behind the door, the pit of your stomach falls and you start to cry again.

Not because she left, not because you couldn’t control it but it was the act of her checking in on you that tugged on your oxytocin, giving you another hit of Jeongyeon that you so desperately craved.

Lifting your chin up barely removing it from the porcelain, you muster all the strength you have to produce one malicious, guttural scream.

“GO AWAY!” the words rip from your throat like the sharp blade of a chainsaw, slicing haphazardly through hard wood, splintering and shattering every millisecond it touches your vocal chords and leaves a blood stain of regret and hatred behind.

Not for her.

Never for her.

For yourself.

You hate that she left, but you never blamed her. It’s not like it was unheard of, a break up before a proposal but you never understood why. Always assuming you were the problem there was no solution for.

Jeongyeon cracks the door, peaking in side and seeing you just your underwear hunched over and collapsing to the floor. Rushing over to you, stabilizing you with her hands- she forces you up on your feet.

You are dead weight at this point, leaning on her because your legs just won’t function underneath you. Pulling your arm around her, she practically drags you to the shower and makes you sit in the bathtub with your head against the wall.

Turning the water on you, it’s ice cold. Yelping at the sheer shock of the frozen water hitting you, complaints slurring out of your mouth instantly hushed when she gets into the shower with you. Sitting behind you and letting the faucet soak her with all her clothes on.

Positioning herself sitting with you between her legs, she brushes your hair off your forehead as the water crashed down on you both and shushes the spewing of your sadness and conquers your anger just by her touch.

The peace her presence brings you in this state has soothed the crashing waves of your heart that drenched every fiber of your being. The broken state of your soul was nothing more then a scratch on the surface while she was holding you and soothing you through this horrific break down of grief that was misguiding you to lash out.

Calmly rocking you back and forth with her, you finally gained some sobriety. Jeongyeon stands to turn the shower off and offers you a towel, while grabbing the matching one you didn’t bother to put away.

Taking your underwear off, now completely naked with a towel barely wrapped around you, attempting to dry off and failing miserably, dropping the towel and whining out of frustration. Picking up the towel, you give it another sloppy attempt.

Jeongyeon is just watching you, the smile in her eyes and smirk on her face feels so condescending considering everything that has happened between the two of you.

“What?” snapped at her while you wrap the towel around your body again and make your way to the bedroom to get something to wear.

“Nothing…it’s nothing.” Jeongyeon removes her shirt and pants, standing there in her shower soaked underwear and bra.

“Did you…uhm…are my clo-” softly uttered before hanging the clothes she was wearing on the shower rod for them to dry.

“Yes. They’re still here. I haven’t gotten rid of…anything.” choking on the words as the tears threaten to spill again.

This beautiful woman, standing in front of you had not only gone out of her way to make sure that you were okay and took care of you knowing that you weren’t…

The nurturing nature of her was what sparked the initial fire that set your heart aflame. The gasoline was how sweet she was, and how much she cared about everyone around her.

Her habits of focusing on everyone but herself was to her detriment- always checking in on others and not really checking in with herself…but that was what made your relationship so pure. She was worried about everyone and you were worried about her.

Given the opportunity, Jeongyeon would move the world for those she loved. Fitting herself in a box so small that she would be uncomfortable to make others feel comfortable. The details of her were never lost on you, always letting her express whatever she needed to and making sure that she knew that you would never judge her in anyway. It was so comfortable and perfect, that’s why it stung so much.

When she dropped that bomb on you those weeks ago, it was like a nuke - scorching every single atom that you ever had and what was happening right now was the fallout.

“Y/n…Can we ple-”

“Not tonight…please…no more tonight.” cutting her off again, not to hurt her but you just couldn’t handle another moment of discourse between the two of you, especially while you’re still drunk.

“Tomorrow.” stated to her, not offered to her.

The conversation you had been needing would happen tomorrow…finally. The closure, the end…whatever you want to call it, would be tomorrow.

The anxiety building in your stomach brought on a different kind of nausea. One that wouldn’t go away from just throwing up the contents of your body but only with comfort that you were too nervous to ask for.

Throwing on a big shirt that was hers and a fresh pair of underwear, you crawled into bed and got comfortable. Letting out a big sigh of relief that your sheets were finally consuming you again instead of the alcohol or complete and utter sadness.

Jeongyeon puts on some of the clothes she left behind, a shirt you got her, underwear and a pair of her sweats that she usually only wore around the house.

“I’m going to sleep on the couch…just so I can be here…if you need me…” timid, almost as if she was asking permission to sleep in the house that had her name on the mortgage.

“No.” calm and steady leaves your mouth.

Sitting up in your bed, you look her in the eyes before throwing the comforter off her side of the bed that you had been sleeping in, patting the sheets as a signal for her to come and lay with you.

Even if it was for the last time.

“Are you sure?” her voice is so gentle and lovely.

“Please, Jeongyeon…” throat clenching around the words as you pleaded for what you assumed to be one more sleep together.

Just one more.

Her eyes soften further, the familiar puppy eyed love you had always known crawls into your shared bed and gets comfortable on her side, like she always did.

Fuck, you missed this so much.

Laying on separate sides of the bed, you just take in the feeling of her warmth in the sheets next to you. The sigh she lets out was one of relaxation and ease. It was very hard to miss.

“Jeongie?” breathed so soft it was barely a whisper as you roll from your back to your side to face her. It was what you always called her when you wanted something, she knew what was coming without even asking.

“Yeah?” worry laces her words as she follows your movement and faces you.

“…I miss you.” the cracks in your voice shatter and sprawl out like lightening, cascading down your chest, through the sheets and up to her.

Not the words, not the tone, but the crack of your voice that let the misery you had experienced the three months she’s been gone…

Silence.

Jeongyeon just looks at you, eyes coated in despair as her own emotions display for what you feel like is the first time. Wondering if it’s her own distress or if it’s just pity for you.

A hand comes out of the darkness, placing itself on the small of your back and dragging you into Jeongyeon, so close you can feel her heart beat and feel her breathing - pressed up against her chest in the hug that you needed from her.

Nuzzling into her neck, you silently sob as you take in the smell of her skin and in the comfort of your bed no less. The peace it brings you brings happiness, even if it’s temporary.

Jeongyeon just holds you, rubbing your back and sniffling. Leaning down to kiss your forehead, she coos and sighs as the tension of her back decreases while holding you. Feeling her harms relax and her back unclench was worth every second of devastation that would follow, knowing you could be this for her…one last time.

“I miss you too. So much.” Whispered to you as you finally drift off to sleep in the comfort her arms, finally getting the safety that you had been missing.

—

Throbbing behind your eyes and a massive wave of nausea wakes you up from the deep sleep you were in. The most sleep you had since she left.

Groaning as you rolled over, you reach out to her side of the bed, hoping and praying that she would still be asleep next to you.

She wasn’t.

Sighing at the empty and cold sheets, you wonder if this is all a dream or if she was actually here last night.

Did she really shower with you?

Was it all just…a drunken daydream?

Slowly sitting up, you grab your head as it pounds into your skull. This hangover was the worst one you’d ever had, like a whip cracking against your brain at every movement you made, no matter how slight.

Taking a second to charge your movements and build up the courage to get up out of bed, you sigh again and give up. Rolling over to Jeongyeon’s side and shoving your face in her pillow, just to take in her smell again.

“Good morning” a familiar voice so angelic breaks your concentration on the memories you were reliving before you could fully immerse in them.

Sling-shotting up, you grab your head and let out a wince and a huff at how dizzy you got with the movement, the pounding continued as Jeongyeon giggles.

“With how drunk you were last night, I knew you would not feel great today…” lifting up a brown paper bag, shaking it at you before plopping it in front of you.

The smell of the burger nauseates you thoroughly.

Flinging a hand over your mouth, you jump off the bed and bolt to the bathroom - immediately regurgitating the toxins left inside you until there was nothing left but bile.

“Are you alright?” through the door, you get a flash back from last night and shiver at the unease of her seeing you this way.

Quietly gasping and trying to catch your breath, you spit. An attempt to rid your mouth of the acidic taste that burns from your stomach all the way to your lips.

“Yeah…” winded replies that feed her worry, unintentionally.

“I’ll meet you in the kitchen in a minute” the sentence stole the air from your lungs, still trying to get back to some sense of the word normal and slowly catching your bearings again.

Standing up, you head to the sink, leaving with your palms on the edge of the counter, with your hair in your eyes. Turning on the faucet, you reach into the stream of cold water. Cupping your hand and splashing it on your face trying to wash your hungover sleep filled eyes and bring some self back to you.

The chill of the water wakes you up, the headache not easing but the nausea was dissipating quickly, you were very grateful for that.

By the time you got to the kitchen, the nausea was replaced by hunger. Looking to see Jeongyeon at the kitchen table, already set out the greasy burger and fries, with a tall glass of water and some medicine next to it.

Sitting down with her, you take the meds first and drink half the glass of water. Placing it back down on the table, you look over at her. Jeongyeon’s food is untouched, sitting in front of her still wrapped up on the foil to keep it warm.

“Are you alright?” reaching over to grab her hand, remembering that she is your ex before you touch her, stopping yourself from the intimate contact.

Jeongyeon watched your hand in motion, seeing you stop from touching her and she swallows harshly. You could hear it from across the table.

“Are you ready to talk now?” asked in faint whispers while she toys with her fingers.

Looking down at your own hands, the nervousness returns back to you from the night she left. Rattling every heartstring you had in a vibration that could’ve made angels cry.

“…Yeah…I think it would be best if we did…” immediately biting the inside of your cheek after the statement, drawing a small amount of blood out of the soft flesh.

“I’m sorry.” Jeongyeon is looking up at you, her eyes glazed over in melancholy grief and regret.

“I’m sorry I left. I was scared that you were going to leave me first. I thought you missing me all the time was hard on our relationship and I was worried it was too much for you. I left because I didn’t want you to leave first…I thought you were unhappy.” her voice is cracking and she’s sniffling, panic interweaved in her words as she continues on with her admission.

“That night I came back…and you asked me what you did to make me want to leave…” a deep breath in and back out, trying to self soothe but having a difficult time regulating.

Her hand reaches up to hold your face, her palm on your cheek and the warmth of her on your skin makes you instinctively lean into her, closing your eyes as your body relaxes.

“Nothing. You didn’t do anything except love me so well that I thought I didn’t deserve it…” Jeongyeon is practically having a panic attack at this point, choking on her own sadness and attempting to even out her breathing, blink her tears away, talk to you- overwhelming herself and it’s sending her into a spiral.

Without hesitation, you get up from your chair and sit on her lap. Wrapping your arms around her and pulling her into your chest while running one of your hands down her back, then back up again. Continuing this repeatedly as it’s the fastest way to quell her anxiety.

“Shh Shh Shh…don’t worry, I’ve got you. You’re safe here.” cooed at her while you squeeze her just a little tighter as she choked on her overstimulation.

“I love you. I’ve always loved you. I will always love you.” through the breath violently hitching and the tenseness of her body.

A long beat of silence.

Your heart stops.

She still loves you…?

“Jeong…” lifting her head so she can see the hangover that was glazing your eyes.

“You really hurt me when you left. I didn’t understand what was going on…I didn’t even know that was a fear you had.” Hand continuing to rub her back.

“I would’ve told you how untrue that was…” brushing a lock of hair from her face.

Her face contorts, holding in her sobs as she lets out the cold, hard truth.

“I don’t think I would’ve believed you…”

That one stung. Though you know it was never anything that you did now that she’s told you. Patting her back lightly, you hatch an idea.

The perfect way to prove it to her.

Getting up from Jeongyeon’s lap, you run into the bedroom and go to your side of the bed. Pulling open the nightstand drawer, you grab the little black box that held the ring you were going to propose to her with that night and make your way back to the kitchen.

Watching you closely as you make your way back to the table and sit down, she doesn’t really know what to expect.

Taking a deep breath and exhaling rapidly, your nerves get to you a moment. Never knowing what her reaction would be to this, you built up as much courage as you could and places the box carefully in front of her.

“I think this might be all the proof you need.” swallowing hard as her shaky hand reaches for the box, popping it open and seeing the ring for the first time.

A gasp echo’s off the walls of your home, the same walls that heard your wails of misery and the same walls that watch you drink away the last three months.

“It’s perfect…”

Every emotion that Jeongyeon has ever felt is displayed on her face for you to see. The heart ache, the love, the regret, and the grief.

“I have so many regrets about that night, Y/n…I would have n-never left if I would have known-” Letting all of her pain flow.

She gathers herself, you look her in the eyes and boldly say:

“You could still say yes, you know?” eyes never leaving her face, trying to judge how that statement blew over.

Frozen in shock as boils over her as she processes what you just said.

“We would have to work on things, of course…that betrayal cut deep…but” taking another deep breath and admitting the truth.

“I’m willing to try and fix this, if you are.” the anxiety in the room was shared between the two of you.

“Really?” disbelief on her lips, the tears sitting on the water line of her eyes threatening to flood down the tracks her previous tears already laid in place for them.

“Really.” nodding your head in reassurance.

Jeongyeon places the box down in front of you, ring facing you and lifts her left hand up with her fingers splayed out, hand shaking from the intensity of the conversation you were having.

Pulling the ring out of the box, you slip it on her finger and admire how it looks on her. Kissing every knuckle she has before releasing her hand and sighing in relief.

“I’m so sorry about leaving…” toying with her ring, looking up at you through her bangs.

“We will get through it…” standing up to sit on her lap again and hug her.

Missing her was an understatement. Being in her arms again made you feel whole in a way that you couldn’t explain, a way you thought was impossible.

It was just her…it was always her.

“…and we will get through it together.” cupping her face and stroking her cheeks with your thumbs.

Leaning in, you kiss her. Soaking up all the love you missed in those three months apart, her lips heal almost every crack in your soul - rejuvenation of your heart in full effect as you lay a few more soft pecks on her lips and then her forehead.

“Together.”

#twice imagines #twice x reader #kpop x reader #kpop imagines #yoo jeongyeon #twice jeongyeon #jeongyeon #jeongyeon angst #jeongyeon x fem!reader #Jeongyeon fluff #but like 4 lines of fluff #twice angst #ANGST

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sungbeam · 7 months ago

Text

007!ji changmin x f!reader

you're sent to montenegro to infiltrate a high-stakes poker game, but with the world hanging in the balance, it's a good thing m's sending her best employee along with you—agent 007, ji changmin.

▷ genre, warnings. f2l, james bond/007/spy au, action, suspense, pining(?), minimal angst, humor bc i'm me, violence, blood, death, mentions of alcohol, mentions of weaponry, mentions of corruption, swearing, kissing, near-death experiences, mentions of terrorism but not explicitly discussed, the ending is kinda cheesy im sorry it's late and i like making him yearn, barely proofread (dudes it's so late when im writing this)

▷ word count. 11.1k

▷ based on. casino royale (2006)

a/n: this is for @winterchimez ally's 007 files collab! pls check out the other fics that have been posted 😎 also, this is way lighter than the actual movie, so uhm, yeah!

YOU KNEW FROM THE MOMENT you first stepped into your position as an agent of the Treasury, that Kenneth Kang would be a thorn in your side. Perhaps not even a thorn, but a massive pain in the neck, the back, the ass. He was a man with a helm of pomade for hair and an ego the size of Russia, who, for some odd reason, despised you.

It was funny… the last time you checked, an entity such as Russia wouldn't be so easily threatened by someone like yourself. But here was Kenneth Kang, continuing to email you passive aggressive correspondence as if he wasn't butthurt the director chose you for this task rather than him.

After all, only the best of the best were selected to assist MI6 with their assignments. The fate of the world hung in the balance.

You told Kenneth just that in your last (hopefully) email to him for the trip: The quarterly reports are still due on Monday, Kang. Remember that Director Song excused me from them because I'm off to go save the world—ta-ta! Or something to that effect.

It was unfortunate the government monitored everyone's emails or you would've signed off with something wildly hilarious like “Love (if pigs flew), Director Song's Favorite <3 (not you)”—that would stick it to him—

A clearing throat drew your attention away from your laptop so abruptly, you were glad you didn't get whiplash.

“This seat taken?” You didn't catch a clear glimpse of the man's face before he was already claiming the seat across from you. The voice was awfully familiar, and when you finally saw him, you understood why.

You nearly did a double take, but the surprise swiftly melted away like glaciers in the spring to something like warm amusement. “Ah, do I—uh—know you, sir?” You asked, gently folding your laptop closed so you can gesture to the teapot before you. “Tea?”

Ji Changmin leaned back in his chair, eyes darting from the view outside the train car window and back to you. He dragged his gaze up and down your form, the back of his knuckles pressed against his lips. It did nothing to hide his smile. “Tea would be lovely, thanks.”

You obliged, refilling your cup with the hot beverage and pouring a decent amount into the extra teacup and saucer on his half of the table.

The two of you were currently on a train to Montenegro. Less than 48 hours ago, you were summoned into your director's office, only for the head of MI6 (the elusive M) to join you. You were debriefed on a high stakes poker game being hosted by a man notoriously reputed for funding terrorist organizations around the globe. You were told that M would be sending her “best” along with you to be dealt into the game—you were never given the agent's name or identification number.

But now that you were nearly an hour's ride away from Montenegro, it seemed he finally decided to reveal himself.

“Are you sure you don't remember me, Miss?” He asked, eyebrows raised over the rim of his teacup. “I was so sure that I left a lasting impression on you the last time.”

You slowly raked your eyes over the sharp, dark blue suit he wore, the white dress shirt beneath opened up at the collar, his wrist fitted with a watch that glistened in the afternoon light filtering in through the window. He had cropped his hair since the last time you saw Agent 007, M's so-called “best.” That was about two years ago, when there was a joint-branch charity gala and the two of you shared a dance before he was called away. Before that, you reckoned it was likely your graduation from Cambridge.

Time flew, you supposed, and you'd both been busy.

The corner of your lips lifted as you took a ginger sip of your tea. “Well then, you'll have to do a better job this time. What brings you to Montenegro?”

“Ah, business. You know how it is.”

“A truly dull answer,” you remarked. He couldn't come up with better conversation? You expected more from the man who always prided himself on buttery smooth lines. Where was the fun in ‘business’? “No wonder you've got all of that on. You're dressed like you're about to go buy a company.”

“Could I buy your company?” He asked in jest, tilting his head to the side.

You set your teacup down and a smile flitted over your lips. “I don't think you'd ever have enough money in the world for that.”

He chuckled then and ran his tongue over his bottom lip, catching a droplet of tea clinging to it. “Challenge accepted.”

When the train pulled into the station at Montenegro, it was just about a quarter past two in the afternoon. You and Changmin stood up from your cozy two-seater table to prepare to disembark. You rifled through your laptop tote for your wallet, but before you could retrieve your money, Changmin was already dropping bills on the table.

“Is this yours?” He asked, placing a hand on the bag stowed above the seat. It was a duffle bag that ranged on the smaller size with enough room to store your toiletries, emergency items, and any other things you might have needed. You were informed that clothing and the like would be in your accommodations waiting for you—there must have been a strict dress code for this event.

You shouldered your purse. “Yes, I'm traveling light.”

“Same here.” He grabbed your bag for you, and the two of you were off, shuffling down the aisle toward the nearest exit. Light, indeed. He didn't seem to have any luggage on him, but you supposed an agent of his caliber was provided everything he needed at his accommodations.

The train station, at this hour, was rather busy. People bustled to and fro to get to their trains, the parking lot, the ticket booth, the works. Your instructions once you'd arrived in Montenegro were to get in touch with the agent who was assigned to this case, and that you already accomplished. Until now, that was about all you knew, barring the general mission at-hand.

“I assume you’ll be staying at the Hotel Splendide, as well?” You voiced to him as you walked by his side toward the valet at the front of the station. You never knew a train station to have a valet, but you supposed it made sense if there were luxury, long-haul train cars.

“Your assumption would be correct,” he said. “In fact, we’re sharing a room.” The reveal of this information nearly had you tripping over your own shoes, and you were sure you saw a ghost of a smile make it onto his lips. You narrowed your eyes at him as he carried onward—of course, the two of you were sharing a room. What cover did MI6 even come up with? Something incredibly original like a married couple, you’d bet. Or, god forbid, a man and his mistress. (The thought made you gag.)

Changmin made eye contact with the valet boy, his chin inclining toward him. “Afternoon. It should be under ‘Ji.’”

The boy traced his finger down the edge of his tablet screen and his eyes lit up in recognition. “Ah yes, Mr. Ji,” he said, grabbing a keychain from his station and tossing it over to Changmin, “your car was just delivered two minutes ago. Have a nice trip, sir.”

“Thank you.” A rolled up bill was exchanged so fast that you thought you’d imagined it, and Changmin was walking onward down the length of the curved curb toward a parked vehicle. You followed swiftly after him, and upon further inspection, realized that the vehicle he was striding towards was a sleek Aston Martin in a classy shade of silver. It looked like something straight out of Hollywood, the sight nearly making your knees buckle. It was enough to say that all thoughts of you sharing a room with Changmin flew out the Aston Martin’s window.

Changmin gave a laugh at your reaction, opening the passenger side door for you. “You look more excited to see this car than me, sweetheart.”

“Was I that obvious? She’s beautiful.” You couldn’t help but grin back as you slipped into the smooth, leather seat. The interior was just as beautiful and sleek, with dark colored leather and a shiny center console. While you buckled yourself in, you heard Changmin deposit your bag in the backseat before rounding the car to take his place in the driver’s side.

“I can’t say I disagree,” he said, the door slamming. He retrieved a pair of aviator sunglasses from a compartment above the rearview mirror, donning them, then flashing you a dimpled smile. “Shall we?”

Changmin revved up the engine and pulled out of the train station's front lot onto the scenic road that would wind down the mountains to reach the portside where Hotel Splendide was located.

“I haven't seen you in two years, have you been well?” You piped up, now that the two of you were alone.

He hummed. “Ah, for the most part, yes—I’ve been alright.”

“Trotting the globe, I bet?”

“You'd win that bet, for sure,” he mused. He passed you a brief glance, turning his eyes back to the road. “And you?”

You mimicked the humming sound he'd made earlier. “I've been decent. Just work most days; you know how it is.”

He nodded his understanding. “Social life just as dead as uni?”

An incredulous sound flew out of your mouth, your hand swatting his arm to coax an impish smile from him. “I have friends!”

“Significant others then,” he offered.

You bristled in your seat and met his grin with a stink eye. “There are more important things than finding romance.”

“Still the same Yn as I remember,” he teased. “Now I know you're not an imposter.” A beat of silence, and then, “M must have been very pleased with your performance records to have approved of your director's choice. Not that I'm surprised; you've always been exceptional in your field.”

You turned your head to face the window on your side, barely hiding the pleased smile on your face from his compliment. It had taken a lot of hard work to get where you were, and you should've been proud of yourself. “I appreciate that. Though, I'm sure the fact that we know each other might have something to do with it, too.”

“I think that's just an added bonus,” he remarked optimistically. “You'll know how to keep me in check.” That was, literally speaking, exactly what your role here was. While Changmin was dealt into the game, you controlled the amount of money he was able to use or bet with. Because you were the trusted agent of the Treasury, you would be privy to the amount of money appropriate to use from the government's coffers.

“Who knew one partner project would lead to us saving the world together?” He added offhandedly with almost a nostalgic sort of whimsy.

“Are you ready to be a team player this time, though?” You asked, eyebrow raised. “The rumors say you enjoy flying solo.”

“I fly solo when it's dangerous,” he corrected. Which, you guessed, was most of the time in his line of work.

“So you're saying this mission isn't dangerous?”

“A poker game?” He laughed. “The only dangerous thing about it is gonna be how fast I'm going to win.”

The Hotel Splendide was as splendid as its name suggested. The grand, white limestone facade was carved with arched windows and statues, sleek columns and balconies. This side faced out into the waterfront, giving all arriving patrons a beautiful view of the port.

Changmin directed his car into the cobblestone roundabout at the front of the hotel. When he brought the vehicle to a stop, a bellboy in a maroon colored uniform opened your car door for you and offered a hand to help you out.

“Thank you,” you murmured, rolling your neck and stretching your limbs from the hour-long car ride.

Changmin emerged from the driver's side with his keys in hand, speaking to another attendant about being careful with his vehicle. He rounded the car just as the bellboy grabbed your duffle from the backseat.

“Welcome to the Hotel Splendide. This way to the check-in counter please,” the bellboy said, gesturing toward the front door, framed by an amber-toned awning and crowned in a myriad of flags from around the world.

You felt Changmin's palm warm the small of your back as you clutched your laptop purse in your hands. “Of course, thank you.”

The hotel’s foyer was just as magnificent as its outside. A crystalline chandelier hung from the high-domed ceiling, painting the room in a luxurious champagne gold, while the marble floors were lined in a deep crimson velvet. The front desk was to your immediate left with a number of staff stationed behind it.

The woman you and Changmin went to greeted you both with a polite smile. “Welcome to the Hotel Splendide. May I have the name of your reservation, please?”

“Ji,” your friend answered, “James Ji.”

Your eyebrows flew to your hairline.

“Ah,” the woman said, “but of course, Mr. Ji. Yours and your assistant's suite has been prepared for your arrival.”

Assistant? While she readied the key cards for you, you met Changmin’s gaze with a number of questions in your eyes. He only answered with a helpless expression.

Assistant? As if.

For fear of jeopardizing the mission by correcting the cover MI6 so generously assigned you, you reluctantly kept your mouth shut.

The desk clerk pushed a pair of cards across the polished wood toward you and Changmin—key cards. “These are your keys for your stay in room 700. All amenities, such as room service and the spa, are included in the fees you paid while booking. Your luggage will be delivered to your room for you. Anything you might need may be addressed via the phone in your suite or here at the front desk.”

(Assistant? Did you look like a fucking assistant?)

Changmin collected the room keys and passed you one. “Excellent, thank you. Did any mail arrive for me?”

“Yes, sir. A small parcel was delivered directly to your suite, as well as several garment bags. You'll find them in your wardrobe. Is that all?”

With nothing else to be addressed, you and Changmin thanked the front desk attendant and you were shuttled toward the elevators at the end of the hall. It was a good thing the elevator carriage made a swift arrival, because as soon as the doors slid closed, you let your frustrations be known.

“Assistant?” You exclaimed, gesticulating frustratedly. “Out of all the cover options? That woman probably thinks I'm your mistress!”

“I didn't choose it,” Changmin said, raising his palms in surrender. Though, it was clear by his expression that he was at least amused by your reaction.

You rolled your eyes, then narrowed them and crossed your arms over your chest. “What if you were the assistant, hm? Why aren't I the rich lady with a handsome secretary I take on vacation with me?”

His grin was teasing as he leaned closer to you, your breath hitching for a split second. There was a brief moment where your senses were fully engulfed by the smell of his cologne and the way a lock of his hair curled over his forehead. “You think I'm handsome?”

As if the universe could feel the warmth rising to your cheeks, the elevator doors mercifully opened onto the seventh floor.

He leaned away, something self-satisfied playing on his mouth as he returned his hand to your back. “Okay,” he drawled, “say I'm your handsome assistant…”

“I'm never living that down, am I?” You groaned, already feeling the headache spike in your temples. Your eyes fluttered about the corridor you entered; it was just as beautiful as the lobby downstairs, but with a slightly moodier glow to the lights as if not to disturb any of the patrons on this floor should they wish for an escape from downstair's hustle and bustle.

“Imagine if Chanhee found out you'd said that.”

“Don't get me started on Chanhee.” Room 700 appeared in your sight, and you smacked your key card against the card reader before letting yourself into the room. As the lights flickered on, you asked Changmin from over your shoulder, “Have you heard from him recently, by the way?”

Chanhee was a mutual friend from your college days. While he was technically a closer friend to Changmin, you'd met Chanhee through Changmin after your partner project and grabbed dinner together every once in a while whenever Chanhee was in town.

You were already making a beeline to the bathroom when you heard the hotel room door close and lock behind Changmin. “Recently? Depends on your definition of ‘recently.’”

The sound of your sigh echoed as you absentmindedly fixed your hair in the reflection. Train hair wasn't as poor as airplane hair, that was for sure. “He misses you,” you said in a singsong tone.

“Is that right?” He chuckled. “I'll shoot him a text then.”

He appeared in the reflection behind you holding two black garment bags, one in each hand. He'd shed his suit jacket somewhere, the sleeves of his white shirt rolled up to expose his forearms. “These are ours for tonight,” he said to you, handing you the one with your name on it.

Ah, tonight. “Thanks,” you said, taking a peek inside to see what exactly was prepared for you. Your curiosity piqued at the sight of deep wine red fabric, but you didn't look any further for the time being.

“Are you ready for tonight?” He asked, stealing a glance at you as he brushed his hair back in the mirror.

At the proximity of tonight's events, you suddenly felt your heart rate climb. Before when this was only an assignment, the gravity of the situation hadn't fallen over you yet. But now that it was your current reality, it began to rush at you with the speed of an oncoming train.

You steeled your nerves. You were tapped to carry out this task for a reason. The only thing you had to do was be wary of Changmin's spending; he was doing the heavy lifting. Even if you were about to be in a room with a few dozen other dangerous people.

You swallowed, nodding. “Ready as I'll ever be.”

He pressed his lips together, his dimples appearing in his cheeks but not because of joy. There was a step forward, then another. “Hey,” he murmured, his thumb brushing over your cheekbone, “I won't let anything bad happen to you or to anybody; that's what I'm here for.”

He draped his garment over his arm and leaned against the bathroom counter beside you. “If we both do our jobs right, we'll be fine. Do you know who our target is? Just so you're aware of who to look out for.”

You nodded, “Le Chiffre.” That was the name of the host of tonight's poker game. He was high on the MI6's most wanted list, and tonight was a critical effort to put a stop to his movements, as well as the credibility he had with his clients. You'd seen pictures of this man—the cold of his eyes and the pale scar that disabled one of his pupils—you were well aware of what he looked like.

“Good,” he murmured. “Then you stay far away from him, got it, sweetheart?”

“Got it.”

Though the gravity of the situation hung heavy in the room after that conversation, Changmin ordered the two of you room service before you needed to prepare for the poker game. You figured food in your stomach would keep you grounded and lessen the nerves trilling through you and making your extremities feel cold to the touch.

Dinner shared in the privacy of your hotel room with an old friend was pleasant. You both sat on the couch sectional next to each other, his arm laid casually over the back of where you sat, as you caught up and dined. There was something oddly warm in his eyes… you didn't know what it was that made him seem so clued into what you were saying, as if he was spellbound. You figured it must be the training he underwent; after all, if he couldn't just muscle his way to an answer, then seduction was also a powerful tool at his disposal.

You just wondered why it was seeping into his interaction with you. Perhaps it became second nature for him to be this way—to lean into every word you said, to brighten at the sound of your laugh, to mirror every smile. To make you feel like you were the only person in his world and that you were all that mattered.

By the time nine o'clock rolled around and you were in the bathroom preparing for the game, your nerves had calmed considerably.

The dress that MI6 provided you was a deep wine evening gown that hugged your upper body and cascaded down the length of your legs before it hung just above your feet. The satin was gathered and left to create a cowl at the neckline, and somebody had thought it was a fabulous idea to leave a high slit in one side all the way up to mid-thigh height. (One wrong move and you were screwed.)

It was as if a river of wine physically wrapped around you as a garment for the night.

Though you appreciated the beauty of it, it only served to make you realize that perhaps controlling Changmin's spending wasn't your only job tonight; your other purpose was to distract everyone else. You weren't sure how you felt about that.

A knock sounded at the bathroom door just as you were fitting on a pair of matching ruby earrings. “Yn?”

“Just a second,” you said. You pushed the earring backing into place and hustled over to open the door. “I'm just finishing… hey.”

Changmin had changed into an all-black suit, a classic piece of uniform that was tailored perfectly to his proportions. His eyes were hooded and dark as he drank you in like a glass of Pinot Noir.

A low whistle drifted out from his lips. “If I'm being honest, you might be a liability in this dress.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” you said, turning back to return to the bathroom counter.

Changmin trailed after you, almost dumbfounded, like he'd forgotten why he'd knocked on the door in the first place.

You tried to suppress your smile as you handed him his comb. “See something you like?”

His eyes met yours in the mirror, tongue swiping over his bottom lip. “I do.”

Your expression shuttered in the mirror having not expected that reply at all.

Changmin cleared his throat, stepping to your side to fix his hair with practiced grace. In no time, his appearance was complete, and he was heading out of the bathroom, his cologne lingering by you.

When you were satisfied, you turned off the bathroom light on your way out to meet Changmin in the main room. He was by the safe, fitting a fresh magazine into a silver pistol with skilled hands. He felt your gaze on the weapon and passed you a glance. “We can't carry weapons into the room,” he told you, “but it's a good idea to have one ready here.”

You bobbed your head in agreement, though you felt your shoulders tighten.

He locked up the safe before making his way toward you. “Do you know how to use one of these?” He asked.

You shook your head. “It was never in my job description,” you said quietly. “I hope you don't have to use it.”

There was a graveness to his gaze now. “I hope I don't have to either.” Because both of you knew, if it came down to it, he wouldn't hesitate.

The room where it happened was deep in the bowels of the hotel, somewhere below the casino floor and above the core of the earth. To get in, one was required an exclusive invitation, which was the item Changmin had received in the small parcel from earlier in the afternoon.

You and Changmin arrived on the scene arm in arm, your posture straight in an effort to come off as nonchalant. As you descended the velvet-lined stairs into the basement room, you were confronted by a pair of broad-shouldered bodyguards with body scanners in their hands. After retrieving Changmin's invitation, you were both scanned separately for security, before being granted entry.

The playing room was on the smaller side with a fully equipped bar on the furthest wall of the room. The centerpiece was an oval table, barred off with railings for spectators to lean on while the game was played. There were a sprinkling of others here, both players and their guests.

Your initial scan of the room, unsurprisingly, produced no familiar faces—but your arm tightened around Changmin's when you caught sight of the man of the hour. Le Chiffre stood on the opposite side of the room, nursing a coup glass of liquor as he spoke in low tones with another man. From this angle, you could see the cut of his one glassy eye and the angry scar that marred his face.

“Our four o'clock,” you muttered between your teeth to your counterpart.

Changmin glanced over out of his peripheral vision, nodding subtly. “How about a drink, sweetheart?” He asked you, his voice slightly louder than your own.

You gave a small smile, and he began to lead you over to the bar.

As the two of you moved, you couldn't shake the feeling of eyes trailing after you, something akin to spidersilk clinging to your limbs that you could never quite brush off. It was no secret that you were one of the few women in the room.

When you reached the bar, Changmin flagged the bartender down. “A vodka martini, please—shaken, not stirred—and a mint julep for the lady.”

“Right away, sir.”

You looked over at Changmin with an impressed purse of your lips. “You remembered,” you mused.

The corner of his lip tilted upward. “How could I forget?”

With your drinks served to you, you gently sipped on your mint julep. It wouldn't do you well to get drunk tonight; you just needed a little liquid courage.

From your side, Changmin stared out into the crowd, likely assessing his opponents in the room. He made a small noise of consideration that made you prompt him. He answered lowly, “You see the man to our nine o'clock?—”

You followed his instructions and casted a single glance that way. At the other end of the bar stood a man in a gray suit, nursing a rum and coke in his hands as he assessed the room for himself.

“—Lee Juyeon. CIA.”

Your eyebrows flicked upward. “Interesting. Are they after our man, too?”

“Good chance that they are,” he said and raised his glass to his lips. He swallowed the last of his drink and set the empty glass behind him, leaning the elbow closest to you against the bar behind him. “Know how to play poker?”

“I’m more of a Go Fish girl, actually.”

He sputtered a laugh, and you smiled into your glass. “You're kidding. Not even a little?”

“Go fish, Mr. Ji,” you said and gestured to him with your glass. “Do tell though, since your boss seems to have so much faith in you. What's the secret to winning poker?”

You hadn't even realized how close your faces were tilted toward each other until you registered the smell of his drink on his breath and the shine on his lips. For a plot second, you swore his eyes even dared a glance away from your own.

Neither of you backed away from the other and remained in the intimate gray space.

“The secret?” He parroted, cocking an eyebrow. He tugged at his bottom lip. “The secret is figuring out what everyone else's tells are. It's about bluffing and strategy. If you can figure out how to tell when a person is lying, then you're practically set.”

You hummed. “I see. So what's my tell?”

“Your tell?” His gaze on you was hot and heavy as his eyes devoured you slowly but surely for yet another instance tonight. You could no longer ignore the rapid hammering of your heart, its insistent palpitations threatening to expose you to the man you swore could already see right through you.

His lips pulled into a slow smile, the kind you couldn't decide if it really was a smile or a smirk. “That’s for me to know, and you to figure out.”

“You don't know then.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, sweetheart.”

A hush fell over the room. You followed everyone's eyes up to the man who had summoned the room's attention. Le Chiffre stood atop the poker table's platform with a small laptop seated upon the table's edge.

“Good evening, everyone, and welcome to the game,” he greeted coolly. “We will begin this evening's festivities with an introduction to our security protocols. This device—” he gestured to the computer, “—is fully secured to store and activate all of the night's betting money. Each player will enter a six-character code, unique to them, that will grant them access to the winning sum—should they win.”

A small murmur of laughter amongst the crowd; you didn't find it funny.

“We will begin with Mrs. Takeuchi.”

One by one, each of the players present tonight came forward to input a six-charactered passcode of their choosing. When Changmin was summoned forward, you watched as his expression became a careful, unreadable slate. He strode up toward the poker table, eyes never leaving Le Chiffre and Le Chiffre's never leaving Changmin. You could feel the tension in the room tighten, and Changmin confidently input his desired password.

When he pressed ENTER, you swore you could feel the fifteen million dollars being locked into the pot. Fifteen million was a shit ton of cash. The amount you were not willing to go beyond was twenty million. As long as Changmin played safe and played well, it wouldn't be a problem.

Not before long, the players were all summoned to the table. You sent Changmin off with a reassuring squeeze of his shoulder, and followed behind him to find a space at the railing to watch.

Changmin settled in the chair directly across from Le Chiffre.

The dealer passed out two cards to every player, each of whom hoarded a stack of chips and rectangular plaques that valued up to fifteen million. As the dealer revealed the four cards before him—two jokers, a king, and an ace—the game was on.

You weren't even sure what you were looking for, but the sinking feeling in your gut would not fade the entire game. You held onto your mint julep until it was drained, eyes trained on the cards lying face down in Changmin's hands as he watched Le Chiffre across from him like a hawk.

He was looking for his tell, you realized.

The match was tense. You couldn't pull your gaze away, for fear of missing some minute detail, even if each move made was technically quite large. In the beginning, however, it felt as though everyone was playing it safer, for fear of getting out too early.

The night was young, and it would do none of them any good if they lucked out of a pot of at least one hundred million.

You watched Changmin, who watched Le Chiffre. You noted the way Le Chiffre would occasionally bring his left hand up to his scarred eye… was that his tell?

It was nearing one hour when it was only Changmin and Le Chiffre who had yet to fold. The dealer called for Changmin to make his move, and you looked over to your counterpart as the gears turned and twisted in his mind.

“I'm all in,” he decided, and shifted his entire pile into the center, mounting up to some amount close to twelve million.

You pressed the backs of your knuckles to your lips in anticipation of Le Chiffre's move. The man did not cower, but rather, called his bet. He moved his pile of fourteen million to the center. All in.

“Gentlemen,” the dealer gestured for their cards to be revealed.

They flipped their cards into view—you could feel the scandal rocket through the crowd.

“A pair of jacks. Monsieur Le Chiffre wins. This marks the halfway point of the match; we will return in one hour to resume, with the big blind set at two hundred thousand.”

Everyone around the table, both players and spectators, began to dissipate to find something to distract them for the hour-long break.

Changmin's posture was taut as a bowstring as Le Chiffre pulled his mouth into a sly smirk across from him. “Ah, Mr. Ji. You must have interpreted my tell wrong. Off your game tonight, don't you think?”

A muscle feathered in the agent's jaw. “I wouldn't be so quick to boast,” he drawled. “The game's not over yet.”

You didn't know what to say, but you knew one thing was for certain—no matter what, you and Changmin could not let Le Chiffre leave tonight with the jackpot. And as Changmin departed the table with a crease between his brows but his head held high, you knew what was on his mind, as well.

“Need a drink?” You asked, as he met you where you stood.

Changmin shook his head. “No, I'm alright,” he said, glancing about. He nudged the back of your shoulder with his fingers, guiding you toward the exit. “Let's get out of this room for a moment though.”

You weren't going to argue with that decision, and the two of you linked arms and made your departure.

When the cool air in the lobby swept over you and all the tension in your body left for a brief moment of paradise. It was so stifling down in that room; you were almost thankful to be wearing this dress.

You and Changmin lingered at the top of the railing that looked down into the lobby from the second flood, heads close together. “What now?” You asked him.

“I need more money.”

“I can give you five million, but that's my limit, Changmin,” you told him firmly.

His brows crossed together. “Five million isn't enough to go toe to toe with a guy who just ended round one with thirty—”

“That's not my fault; this is policy.” You knew the world hung in the balance, but while that was his job, this was yours. You sighed. “Maybe I can contact someone about approving more, but right now, five million is our only option. Do we not have a plan B?”

Changmin's lips pressed into a line. “Plan B is hoping he does something fucking illegal in front of my face, and praying that reinforcements come in fast enough to take him away.”

Now it was your turn for your brows to crease. “Why do we have to wait for him to do something illegal? Don't we know he's a criminal?”

“We're onto him, yes, but there has been no tangible proof that he's a corrupt banker,” Changmin admitted tersely. He absentmindedly rubbed his jaw with his palm. “If we could just—”

“Ji.”

Both you and Changmin straightened. Coming toward you from down the hall was Lee Juyeon, the CIA agent Changmin had pointed out to you earlier.

You didn't fail to notice the way Changmin blocked you from Juyeon's view with his body. “Lee,” Changmin greeted back.

Juyeon nodded to you in hello with a warm smile, and you lifted your hand to wave. He seemed decent enough.

Changmin’s eyes narrowed as he shifted so he stood next to you now, an obvious arm slung around your waist. “I didn't know the CIA was on this.”

“I didn't know the MI6 was on this,” Juyeon fired back. He let out a sigh that sounded about as stressed as you were. “I wanted to propose a deal with you.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, well—” Juyeon cupped the back of his neck with one hand. “I'm not the most adept poker player,” he confessed. If you remembered correctly, he nearly lost half his money throughout round one—then again, Changmin lost all of his. According to Le Chiffre, it was because he had read his tell incorrectly; you must have interpreted the wrong one, too. “And I figured that I'm not going to be making enough right moves in the second round to even stand a chance against Le Chiffre. You've got the balls to go up against him, and I know you're down a few bucks, so I wanted to bow out of the round and stake you instead.”

Both you and Changmin glanced at one another in surprise.

Juyeon was backing out… and wanted to stake Changmin? Stake, meaning to invest or sponsor him; to give Changmin funds.

Changmin's eyes narrowed. “And what would I do for you in return?”

“You would give the CIA Le Chiffre.”

What other choice did you and Changmin have? Five million was not enough to make a winning comeback; at least being sponsored would give Changmin enough cushion to make some more mistakes. The allyship between your governments was enough to make the CIA taking Le Chiffre in the end seem like a victory.

Changmin exhaled and stuck out his hand. “Deal.”

The second round was no less tense than the first. Changmin entered with more determination and fury than before, and Le Chiffre was no short of amusement and arrogance.

After Juyeon made his official departure from the game, he came to stand by you to spectate and offer insights wherever he could. The game chugged on by for another half hour with bets being placed, drinks being sipped, and money being exchanged.

You watched Changmin reach for his glass again, only to pause. There was a moment where you didn't breathe, and you watched his hand retract up toward his shirt collar to loosen it.

“Something wrong, Mr. Ji?” Le Chiffre asked.

You squinted at him, disliking the sinking feeling that had returned to your gut.

“Break,” Changmin suddenly called out, as he stumbled out of his seat and pushed out of the room in a hurry.

Eyes widened, you bolted after him, leaving Juyeon to wonder what had happened to Changmin.

You called out to your partner as he stumbled into the elevator, and you crashed in after him. “Oh my—fuck. What the fuck happened?” You asked as Changmin toppled over into you, sweat dripping down his face and his skin growing more and more flushed.

You jammed the button for your floor in a hurry as you attempted to hold him upright. “God, you're heavy, man—”

“Poison,” he choked out, practically ripping his shirt collar open, as if it was constricting his breathing. He gasped for air and clung onto you like a lifeboat.

Panic seized you by the heart and squeezed hard. “Oh my god. Okay—uhm, okay. What do we do? Changmin, what do we do?”

The elevator arrived on the seventh floor, and you half dragged Changmin toward your room. “The—the antid—antidote—”

“The antidote! We have an antidote?” You didn't have time to question him as you retrieved your room card from within your dress and barged into the hotel suite.

You deposited Changmin onto the floor as quickly and carefully as you could, hands shaking as you helped to take his shirt off so he could breathe.

“Safe,” he gasped to you.

“The safe? Fuck, what's the code?” You asked, clambering to your feet and racing over to the black box in the wall.

You heard him choke out the four digits, and the safe swung open without ceremony. You rifled around the contents and retrieved an aluminum foil packet with a slim syringe inside. “Found it!” You cried and practically slid across the floor to get back to him.

You ripped the packet open as Changmin's breathing continued to shallow, his skin paling, and his body growing weaker. His left palm had landed somewhere on his thigh—inject here.

“Shit,” you swore, grimacing to yourself before stabbing the syringe into his leg.

As soon as the liquid was gone, all you could do was pray.

But the storm clouds were beginning to clear, and color slowly returned to Changmin's face. You sank back onto your heels, relief and adrenaline coursing through you.

“Fucking hell, that was a close—”

White hot pain flashed through you as something—someone—grabbed you by your hair and yanked. Your scream pierced through the silence, and it was nearly enough to wake the dead.

They were dragging you backward toward the door, and you reached up to claw at their hands, your skull feeling as if it was being pulled into a million directions while being set ablaze, all at once.

“Let—go!” You screeched, thrashing around. You couldn't see your captor, but they suddenly released their grip on you.

Relief was short-lived.

Your head whipped to the side as a shoe met your cheek. Stars danced in your vision, and you cried out in pain—and then you begged. You were certain Changmin was still recovering, hardly in a state to save you, and desperation began to claw itself into your heart.

Your body was hoisted up beneath your armpits and you squirmed, fighting for your life.

For a second, you were sure you heard Changmin call out your name.

You threw your elbow back into your attacker's face, then tried the back of your head—the sound of pain and bones cracking echoing in your eardrum.

“You bitch!” They roared, loosening their grip to feel their broken nose.

You were a mess as you landed on the ground. A gleam of silver caught your eye. The gun.

Adrenaline seized you and you made a mad dash for the table where the gun was stowed beneath.

Your opponent caught your ankle and dragged you back down to earth. There was no time to mourn over bruised knees and limbs, and you kicked your heels out behind you in a blind fury, desperate to get away.

“Yn—”

“Please,” you screamed, begged. Whoever that was—you just wanted this to end. Fear coursed through you as your body began moving backwards and was dragged back to the door.

You dug your fingers against the polished ground, unsuccessfully gaining purchase. You clutched at a chair leg and dragged it along with you, and felt the hand around your ankle tighten—

With all your strength, you took the chair and heaved it back toward your captor. He let out a garbled swear, only agitated by your continued resistance. The hand around your ankle disappeared and you took it as an opportunity to get away.

“Not so fast.”

Your body hit the ground, the back of your head making purchase against stone. This time, you saw your assailant—he was one of the guards from earlier, likely working under Le Chiffre's orders. Blood dribbled down his lower face, courtesy of your retaliation.

“I should just kill you here and now,” he growled and enclosed his meaty hands around your neck. “Won't make a difference.”

You struggled against him, but to no avail. Your windpipe was being crushed and your vision blurred.

You thrashed and scratched and kicked—this was the end. Oh god, was this the end?—

A shot rang out.

Air slowly began seeping into your airway and you hacked a cough around the hands that had fallen away from your throat.

The dead body above you was heavy and sticky, and the smell of iron permeated your nose like a nightmare. You didn't even realize your cheeks were damp until you blinked and tears filled your eyes.

You nearly died just then.

With a suppressed sob, you shoved the dead body off you with all of your remaining strength.

There, by the table, was Changmin and the smoking gun in his hand. He still looked only half conscious, but he'd managed to get himself to sit up with pure willpower, enough to reach the gun stashed beneath the table, and to aim and fire a shot.

The room was quiet for a few moments, other than the persistent ringing in your ears.

Then you let yourself cry—it shook through your body and shoulders in violent sobs.

Changmin's chest clenched painfully at the sound, and the gun clattered out of his hand so he could crawl his way over to you. His hair, his face, his clothes were all dampened in sweat and the empty syringe laid abandoned on the floor. He made it over to where you were, the red of your dress mixed with the blood of a dead man, and held your body close to his.

“I'm sorry,” he muttered against your hair, lips pressed against your crown. “You’re okay; we're okay now,” he promised.

With his strength slowly returning to him, Changmin sat himself upright and let your body lean against him. You grappled onto him so tightly, as if he might slip out of your grasp.

It was almost thirty minutes later that you and Changmin returned to the poker game. With some gentle coaxing, he got you into the shower to wash the blood away, but you couldn't get the icky feeling clinging to you. He'd been gentle, though, letting you sit beneath the stream in your dress as he got onto the shower floor with you to run the water and soap through your hair.

In his hold, he rocked you gently through the tremors. “No one's gonna hurt you anymore, sweetheart,” he rasped. Never again, not if he could help it.

You'd never seen him like that—all the tenderness in his gaze out in the open.

And you'd only seen it when you glanced up at him once; the rest of the time, you tucked your chin to your knees, staring at a tile.

Unnerved but still alive, you entered the room with another clean dress, and Changmin with another clean set of clothes. You returned to your place beside Juyeon, and Changmin went back to the table to face Le Chiffre.

Le Chiffre, however, looked as if he'd seen a ghost. His eyes had widened just a millimeter, but it was enough.

Changmin dragged up the sleeves of his dress shirt, a predatorial-like gleam in his eyes. You almost killed me. Even worse, you dared to lay a dirty hand on her. “Sorry about that,” he drawled, gaze lifting to meet Le Chiffre's, “seemed that last hand nearly killed me.”

His opponent swallowed.

The game resumed.

With the final phase in play, the dealer announced that there could be no more buy-ins. Juyeon had fetched you a drink, which you were most grateful for, and Changmin avoided all beverages for the remainder of the game.

“Everything alright?” Juyeon asked you quietly as you chugged your drink.

“Perfectly.” You handed the drink off to a waiter nearby and smiled tightly. “We were just strategizing on how to murder this game.” You hoped he didn't hear the tremor in your voice.

As the final round approached, each of the four finalists that were left alive were asked to make their bets. Each player slowly, but surely, slid all of their remaining chips into the center.

Everyone was all in.

“Reveal your cards, if you please.”

One by one, the cards in each player's hand was turned. The room held its collective breath as Le Chiffre revealed an ace and a six—a fuller house, with three aces and two sixes.

All that was left were Changmin's.

With little more than an arched brow, he slid his cards apart: a five and seven, both of which were spades. When joined together with the rest, they made—

“A straight flush,” announced the dealer. “Monsieur Ji wins the game.”

Cheers and applause rang out throughout the room as the game finally came to a close. Relief soared through you, and you shook hands with Juyeon at Changmin's success. Perhaps twenty million had been spent, but it all meant that you had won back that money in full.

From your standpoint, you couldn't see Le Chiffre's reaction, but he didn't look pleased. He stormed out of the room only moments later.

Changmin was swift to join the two of you, his hand coming to lie on your shoulder. “We should go after him,” he said.

Juyeon nodded, expression sobering. “You're right.”

“I'm going with you,” you told him. Already anticipating his refusal, you shut him down with a look. Though you might have been shaken from the night's near-death experience, it only seemed to steel over your resolve to catch this bastard. “I'm safer with you; don't try to argue with me.”

He knew you were right—you saw the reluctant agreement in his eyes. He grunted, “Okay, but you're staying behind me the entire time and when I say run, you better run.”

You patted his chest and followed after Juyeon. “Of course.”

The three of you raced after Le Chiffre in the direction he disappeared. He'd gone up to the second floor via the grand staircase in the lobby, but neither you nor the other boys knew which direction he went from there. The second floor was damn near close to a labyrinth.

“We split up,” Changmin declared. “Me and Yn go one way and Juyeon takes the other.”

“Wait, Juyeon goes alone?” You butted in. “Le Chiffre is dangerous and desperate; that combination isn't good for anybody.”

“None of us have any weapons either,” Juyeon pointed out.

Changmin gestured to you. From beneath the skirt of your new dress, you withdrew the pistol from earlier out into the light. After what happened in your suite, the both of you thought it best to let security measures be damned and holster a gun to your inner thigh. And now, it was proving to be the right decision.

Juyeon deadpanned, amending, “I don't have a weapon.”

“Then you should go get one,” Changmin said smartly. You rolled your eyes at him.

“I—shit.” Juyeon huffed in frustration. “Goddamn it. You better hold your promise, Ji.”

“My word is gold,” Changmin swore as you passed him the pistol. “We'll find Le Chiffre; you call for backup.”

With that matter settled, you grabbed Changmin's hand and set off in one direction.

His fingers tightened around you as you stuck close behind him. The corridor was hauntingly quiet with not a soul around. You and Changmin trudged onward and kept your eyes and ears open for anybody hiding behind a corner or waiting to enact revenge on your poker victory tonight.

The hair on your arms and the back of your neck stood erect, heart thundering loudly in your ears.

So loud, that you almost missed it.

You caught Changmin's eyes. Did you hear that?

There it was—it sounded like voices coming from a room further down the hall.

“—please, just a few more weeks, and I can get you your money back!”

A muffled response in return.

“NO! I swear, I'll do better! I have another i—”

You never heard the end of Le Chiffre's offer. There was only the sound of a metallic swish, followed by a dull weight hitting the ground. A body.

Your breath hitched as you and Changmin looked around wildly for a swift exit or cover. There was an emergency stairwell just a few doors down.

Changmin grabbed you and booked it.

Your breath caught in your throat as he pressed you against the open doorway, eyes flickering somewhere behind you to watch the door the voices had come from.

“Do you trust me?” He asked, eyes furiously searching your own.

You didn't have to think about it. “Yes.”

Just as a door opened in the hallway, Changmin cupped your jaw with his hand, braced himself against the doorway with the other, and kissed you.

Your eyes fluttered closed upon immediate impact and you felt your heart leap into your throat. His lips moved gently against your own, as if afraid of breaking you, and his hand moved down from your jaw to wrap around your waist to pull you flush against him.

One moment you were melting into his embrace, and the next, he was shoving you behind the other side of the doorway for cover.

A war cry rang out—not Changmin, you realized—as a body blurred past you and was thrown into the stairwell's metal railing. Your soul nearly left your body, head turning in time to throw yourself out of the way of the incoming bodies.

Changmin brawled and grappled on the floor with a second man, a silver machete glistening in the dim light, only a few centimeters from his throat. The first man was slowly beginning to stand up, and your eyes tracked where Changmin's gun had skidded to the floor.

You swiped the gun up just as Changmin wrestled his opponent off him.

With adrenaline powering through you, you smashed the butt of the gun against the back of the man's skull. He crumpled to the cement—unconscious.

“Here,” you breathed, helping Changmin to his feet and shoving the gun into his hand.

He shook his dizziness away, eyes widened on something behind you. “YN, DUCK!”

You swore, and dropped to the ground, narrowly missing the arc of the first man's machete attempting to remove the head from your shoulders.

You dove down the first set of stairs to get out of the way of the fight, your knees and hands scraping against the cement and bruising.

The man with the machete attacked Changmin with reckless abandon, swinging his blade and striking the railing to make sparks fly. Changmin had no opening to use his firearm and—oh shit. They were coming this way.

“Yn, you better be fucking running.”

He didn't need to tell you twice. You tumbled down more stairs, ditching your heels as you went. You would be useless in this fight, so your best action would be to get the fuck out of the way.

Changmin's breath flew out of his chest as he hit the wall hard, then stuck his hands out in time to stop the assassin from impaling his head on the sword. Changmin drove his knee into his stomach, then threw him across the stairs to the opposite landing.

The fight clambered on down the spiral stairwell, metal clashing against metal, and bone and flesh grinding against stone. Changmin gritted his teeth as he fumbled backwards down the stairs, hitting the opposing wall with even more momentum.

He ducked—and missed another swing; and another; and another.

There was a kick to his gut, and his body went flying. His assailant took a leaping start and charged. Changmin grabbed at his hands again, desperately attempting to wrestle the machete away.

The weapon went sailing; that was his opening.

With pure adrenaline, Changmin fisted the man's shirt and flung him over whatever railing was left. You cursed as his body hit the basement floor with a thump.

Changmin tackled him as he attempted to climb to his feet. With the violent thrashing, Changmin ended up beneath him, his arm wrapped tightly around his opponent's neck, and he squeezed.

The man's arm flopped about, desperately reaching for the gun that scattered onto the floor from all the ruckus. If he could just reach it—

You lunged for the gun, tripping as the man clawed at your ankle to throw you off. You shrieked, swinging the barrel at his hand to knock it away.

When you finally managed to scramble backward, you watched the light fade in the assassin's eyes.

As soon as the man slumped in death, Changmin loosened his grip and crawled out from beneath the body.

You clambered over to him and helped him to his feet, his joints and muscles screaming as he attempted to straighten. He groaned, white-knuckling the railing, “Fucking hell.”

“Are you okay? Holy shit, Changmin,” you said, wrapping your arms around him to hold him up. There had been too many close calls there.

You passed a glance over at the corpse lying on the floor about a meter away from you. A shudder rippled down your spine, and you felt Changmin's hand on your forearm, like he knew.

From up above, you heard the sound of the stairwell door opening. The two of you peered straight upwards as a familiar face peered over the landing.

“Le Chiffre's dead,” said Juyeon. In his hand was a pistol; it seemed he finally retrieved his firearm.

“No shit,” you and Changmin replied simultaneously, chests heaving up and down in laborious panting.

Juyeon blinked, squinting his eyes to take in your appearances. “What the fuck happened to you guys?”

“Careful,” you called up to him, “that guy isn't dead.”

Juyeon jolted and he considered the body at his feet with new awareness.

You threw one of Changmin's arms around you to begin the ascent back up. “Can you—fuck. Is that yours?” You swore for the thousandth time tonight as you peered over at the growing dark splotch of red seeping through Changmin's shirt.

He hung his head as strength rapidly bled out of him with his own life force, and you carefully laid Changmin down on the ground.

“Juyeon!” You called out. “Juyeon, help!”

You heard rapid footsteps in the distance, but it faded to background noise as you ripped open Changmin's shirt and came face to face with the vicious knife wound in his abdomen. “Oh my god,” you whispered. God, there was so much blood.

“Cover the wound, Yn,” Juyeon said to you as he leapt down the final steps. “Fuck, this looks bad.”

“He must not have begun to feel it until the adrenaline was over,” you reasoned in a desperate attempt to keep your head on straight. Per Juyeon's instructions, you pressed your palms over the wound, bile rising in your throat from all the blood. “Changmin—Changmin, come on. Stay with me.”

He murmured something you couldn't hear, and you leaned your ear down over his lips. “Come on, talk to me, love. Tell me something, anything.”

His voice came out, barely there. “I'm… I'm glad I got—I got to see you again.”

And he would see you again. That was a promise you made to yourself, and to him, as Juyeon called for his reinforcements and you clung onto Ji Changmin's life with your own.

When Changmin came to, it was bright enough to blind him. There was a fuckass beam of sunlight shining right into his eyes, and he blinked rapidly, wrinkling his face into a grimace. There was a violent throbbing in his abdominal area that ached when he attempted to roll over or sit up.

Was he dead?

“You're not dead.”

His body immediately relaxed into the sheets he was settled in. When his eyes grew accustomed to the god awful amount of light in the room, he was met by the sight of your face, silhouetted against the sun, and beautiful. “Are you sure? 'Cause I'm pretty sure you're an angel.”

Your palm came over to rest against his forehead, and his eyes fluttered shut. “You must still have that fever,” you teased.

When you both shared a laugh, he opened his eyes again.

It seemed he was in a hospital room—well, something akin to that. It looked more like a small bedroom was transformed into one, and he laid on the bed with a heart rate monitor hooked up to him on the side. You perched on the edge of his bed with a cardigan draped over your frame, and something soft in your eyes.

No, he was definitely in heaven. Maybe he didn't die, but he was in heaven.

Your expression sobered as your hand drifted down to caress the side of his face. “You lost a lot of blood,” you whispered. “I was really worried about you.”

Changmin brought his hand up to gently take your wrist and turn your palm inward, his lips meeting your hand in a butterfly kiss. “Hey, sweetheart. I'm alright now, see?” He intertwined your fingers, missing the feeling of how they felt interlocked in the hotel hallway.

The hotel hallway—the fight—Le Chiffre—the kiss. His lips seared at the memory, and he fought the urge to touch his lips at the phantom sensation.

“What happened?” He croaked out instead, gazing up at you. His heart tugged against its confines when he made out the shape of dark purple smudged against your cheekbone. It was the bruise forming from the guard who came after you, and it made Changmin ache to see.

Hurt, you'd been so hurt.

You shifted your body so you could tuck your feet onto the bed, too. “Juyeon came with reinforcements and we got you out of there as soon as possible. One of Le Chiffre's clients killed him—the guys you fought with in the stairwell. Apparently he'd used their money to buy into the game, and because he wasn't able to win, they killed him.”

Changmin stared up at the eggshell-colored ceiling. He supposed that would have been the tangible evidence needed to convict Le Chiffre, but his client was faster at acting as judge, jury, and executioner.

“M's on her way to meet with you,” you continued, your thumb gently tracing dizzying circles onto the back of his hand.

“To be expected,” he chuckled. He glanced back up at you. “How are you? Were you hurt at all?”

You shook your head. “No, nothing to your extent. There were a few scratches and bruises, but nothing time won't heal.”

“And everything else?” Your mental state, especially after all you went through, could not have been in a terrific place. If he could have prevented you from experiencing any of what happened, he would do it in a heartbeat.

The pure fear that speared through his chest when he thought you were about to die…

He had long since figured out that what he felt for you was not simply platonic. It was more—he yearned for more. Seeing you again after so long just made it worse.

You made a noncommittal noise. “I'll… I'll be alright.”

For a moment, the room filled with only silence and the white noise from the heart rate monitor. You suddenly perked up at something, and turned to reach over to grab an item from the side table. Changmin recognized the small laptop device from the poker game now seated on your lap.

“The money pit from the game was stored in escrow in a Swiss bank. A representative from the bank delivered this to us,” you explained, showing him the screen. It left room for a passcode to be filled in. “To the victor go the spoils, love.”

The nickname made him shudder and he forced himself into an upright position.

“Changmin—”

“I got it,” he countered and stubbornly gritted his teeth through the pain until he was seated against the headboard next to you. He clutched his injury, head knocked back against the wood. “Well? Wanna guess the password?”

You lifted your brows in amusement. “Do you know how many six letter combinations exist out there? For all I know, it was a random keyboard smash.”

He chuckled lowly, leaning his chin against your shoulder. “S.”

We're really doing this? You seemed to ask with the expression on your face. You humored him, though, pressing down on the S key.

“W.”

The letters that followed amounted to S-W-T-H-R-T. You were quiet for a second as you stared at the final combination; you didn't want to press the enter key just yet.

Changmin murmured against your shoulder. “I'm not one for corny messages, but that's a 'sweetheart’ if I've ever seen one.”

You were still quiet as you pressed enter and unlocked the winner's pot. There was no special celebration, no balloons or confetti—just a solid number with too many zeroes for your little heart to handle. Perhaps, in the end, there really was no amount of money in the world that could buy your company. Not if you freely gave it, at least.

Changmin felt his chest lurch. “Yn, sweetheart, say something.” He leaned off your shoulder so you could turn your body to face him, the laptop returning to its place on the side table.

“What should I say?” You asked, your fingers playing with his own in your two hands.

“I'm sorry if the kiss was too much.”

You faltered for a second. “It, uhm, it wasn't too much. I actually thought that it was nice.”

“You did?” He hated the way hope made him feel, how it made his heart sprout wings—maybe he was dead.

A small smile crawled onto your lips and you dug your teeth into your bottom lip. “Maybe I did.” You raised a hand to the side of your face, an embarrassed groan falling out of your mouth. “God, I feel like a teenager with a crush again.”

“Giddy?”

“Pathetic,” you teased. You leaned your head against the headboard again as you looked over at him with the most beautiful gleam in your eyes he had ever seen.

He never understood the romanticizing of someone's eyes—what else had he ever discerned but fear or boredom? But he could hear your laugh just by seeing your smile reach your eyes, and he could feel the warmth spreading in his chest and making electricity zip down his spine from the tenderness in your irises.

He swallowed hard. “If you feel pathetic, then I am literally chopped liver,” he said. A surge of courage, the kind that was a trademark of his reputation, propelled his next words: “I'd like to kiss you again.”

Your eyes darted to his lips and he clung onto that detail as if he were hanging by a thread. “Because you saved the world, Agent 007, you can kiss the girl,” you mused.

You leaned over him slightly and cupped the back of his head, mouth meeting his own in a familiar dance. Even with his injury, he pushed back to meet you, and ignored the throbbing in his stomach, so he could haul you closer, over, around him. Anything to get you pressed up against him.

Real—you were real, and you were alive, and so was he.

a/n: pls remember to reblog + comment if u enjoyed! omg that permanent taglist looks SCARY 😭😭😭

tbz m.list

permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @outrologist @rikizm @luumiinaa @tinkerbell460 @kaaimins @hyunjaespresent-deobi @otterly-fey @zzoguri @floatingpluto @winterchimez @ethereal-engene @gyulfriend @polarisjisung @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @loveliestfelix @bless-311 @zhaixiaowen @leaz-kpop-life @amourdsr @pxppxrminty @kqyutie @sseastar-main @kxthleen14 @fluorescentloves @mosviqu @jaerisdiction @super-btstrash-posts @jundundun @http-gyu @mvvnsseul @vernonburger @maessseongs @ericlvr @mars101 @moonyswolf @your-mirae @richasdiary @deobi0412 @sunramzi @honeyrecommends @synthwxve @dearly-somber @empire-x @kflixnet

#🔎 — the 007 files #deoboyznet #kflixnet #the boyz x reader #ji changmin x reader #changmin x reader #the boyz oneshot #the boyz drabbles #the boyz imagines #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fanfic #changmin drabble #changmin oneshot #changmin angst #changmin scenarios #changmin imagines

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savannahsdeath · 1 year ago

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heyyy could u write something where like reader is about to shower but starts to get really insecure and kinda has a breakdown, BUT ellie reassures her. (pls also give reader stretch marks bc i've been so insecure abt mine lately and i have them literally everywhere. thighs, hips, even on my boobs lol) <3

ELLIE WILLIAMS X INSECURE!READER

mdni please<3

warnings: 18+!! but tbh its minors safe this time i think ??

writers note: just a reminder youre all beautiful no matter what!! beauty standards or wtv was it called are something we shouldnt base our life on but we sadly do. self love is the key to happiness and dont let other people ruin it!!🩷🩷and to our lovely anon, you dont need to worry about stretch marks. trust me, most of people dont even pay attention to them! its nothing 'special in a bad way'. i lately got some too, right before my holidays and theyre sooo visible through my summer clothes but its something you can get used to be comfortable with. please, anon, dont think less of yourself because of them nor any other insecurities. and this comes to everyone!!💞

it was already late so you were getting ready to take a shower to not waste any more time. you put your clothes on a nearby shelf. you stood in front of the mirror in your underwear only, looking for anything that could be possibly pointed out, like you didn't have enough insecurities already. feeling rather self-conscious, you were examining your reflection for any flaws or imperfections. every detail of your body was being inspected up-close, from the lines on your stomach, to the size of your thighs, to the shape of your shoulders and face. your eyes were scanning every inch of you, seeking any signs of something you could hate, even if others wouldn't notice them. you couldn't help but wonder if the things you were stressing over were even worth worrying about, or if you were just creating problems where they didn't exist.

either way, you couldn't help but hate them. and since you mostly focused on bad things and you didn't see your advantages - you hated yourself. in your eyes your whole body could change. or even should change.

the more you stared at yourself in the mirror, picking apart every little thing, the more you hated what you saw. it felt like nothing was good enough, like every little imperfection needed to be changed or worked on. you felt like you could never measure up to this impossible standard, like your entire body was inadequate. the insecurities were eating away at you, gnawing away until any confidence or self-love you might've had was gone.

that was the moment your eyes beginned to get glossy. you didn't cry though, oh, no. you hated the way you look when you cry, just like everything else, so you tried your best to hold back tears. the floodgates were beginning to open, but you held them back with everything you had. you despised the way you looked when you cried: the tears down your cheeks, your puffy eyes, all those disgusting, revolting imperfections. as much as you hated your flaws, you despised your crying face even more. you would never let anyone see you like that, never.

suddenly, your girlfriend and roommate in one, knocked on the door. "everything okay in there?"

she must notice you're taking your time instead of simply taking a shower already.

you stayed silent, knowing if you try to open your mouth you couldn't control what comes from them. you'd probably break down and the thick door won't be enough to mute your pathetic sobs.

you didn't want to answer, but then again, you knew if you stayed quiet, your girlfriend would eventually come in and check on you. you had to keep yourself together. you couldn't fall apart right in front of her like that.

you let out a shaky breath and replied, "yeah, everything's fine." you could feel your voice cracking with each word, but you were determined not to let her see you in such a sorry state.

what if she sees me the way i see myself?

your girlfriend wasn't fooled by your shaky reply. even if you denied it, she knew something was wrong. she heard the emotion in your voice and could sense the struggle to keep yourself together. without another word, she opened the door and walked in.

"what's wrong, pretty girl?" she asked when she didn't saw your glossy eyes yet.

you, on the other hand, couldn't control yourself anymore. the nickname 'pretty girl' hit you instantly, thinking you're anything but pretty.

pretty.

girl.

those two words hit you harder than a punch to the gut, evoking a strong reaction that you tried to mask. you took a deep breath to steady your voice so that you didn't break, but it was impossible to sound completely calm when you felt so much pain just from those two words.

"nothing." you muttered quietly, but your voice sounded more like a choke than a word.

she hugged you from behind, looking in the same, unlucky mirror. her hands softly touched the scretch marks on your hips as she hold onto them, gently rocking you back and forth.

you wanted nothing more than to reject this hug and flee from your own reflection in the mirror, but you were too weak to pull away.

"nothing?" she asked gently, planting little kisses from your neck to shoulders.

you felt a wave of shame and embarrassment wash over you as your girlfriend's touch revealed the marks on your hips. she immediately spotted them and caressed them with her soft hands.

it all felt too much. you were fighting so hard to hold yourself together, but when she touched you, it all came crashing down. the tears finally escaped and you began to sob, clinging onto her tightly as you broke down. "no... not nothing..."

she held you close, feeling your warmth as her arms wrapped around you and her hands comforted your pain. she rubbed your back and kissed your neck as she tried to soothe you. "shh, come here, it's okay..." she whispered gently.

she led you over to the bed and laid you down. she carefully took off her shirt, leaving on only her bra and boxers, then laid down with you, hugging you tightly. she kissed your neck, your face, brushed your hair back, caressed your body, your stretch marks, your insecurities (at least the ones she knew about), anything to try and comfort you. she whispered words of reassurance and love as she tried to fill you with the affection you felt you lacked. "i love you, my pretty girl... i love you." she repeated those words again and again, hoping you'd believe that someone could love you, and that someone was her.

ellie continued to hold you tightly as you cried into her. your tears soaked into her bra, but she didn't mind; you'd done that many times before. she rubbed your back in soothing circles as she let you let it all out, and she made small shushing noises in your ear. your sobs turned into whimpers and then into a soft murmur, and as your emotions died down, she gently wiped away the tears, replacing them with kisses.

as she noticed you calmed down she slightly pulled away to get a better look at you. "can you tell me what's wrong now?"

"i... it's just..." you started, and your voice broke as you tried to find the words. your girlfriend gave you her undivided attention, focusing on you and only you. "i- i don't feel pretty... i don't feel good enough... i don't feel... enough."

with her eyes looking deep into yours, you couldn't help but be vulnerable as you opened up to her. your insecurities and flaws, the things you tried so hard to hide, were all laid bare in front of her now.

a pang of guilt hit you in that moment.

what am i doing?

ellie was so sweet and loving, and you felt like you were just taking advantage of her kindness. like you're just an attention seeker.

but before you could say anything, she pressed a finger to your lips.

"no. shut your mouth." she said sternly, and you couldn't help but chuckle a bit. "that's not true. i don't wanna hear it, not another word." she leaned in and pressed her soft lips to yours.

you found yourself sitting on her lap, as she stroked your hair, whispering something or kissing you from time to time. you told her all about it, about what and how you feel. and she listened.

you were so lost in your emotional story you didn't even notice the way she slowly took off her rings - one by one, and placed them on a bedside shelf.

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams #ellie williams x y/n #ellie williams x you #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #ellie tlou #reqs open #ellie the last of us #ellie williams x insecure!reader #ellie x insecure!reader #insecure!reader

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chosotallgf · 3 months ago

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UNEXPECTED TURN - CHOSO KAMO [chapter 1]

SUMMARIZE.. y/n never bothered getting to know choso after the shibuya incident happened and he became an ally to jujutsu high but what happens when he decides to try and get to know her on a personal level and they start getting put on mission together

TAGS.. choso x fem!reader, shibuya incident arc spoilers!!, post shibuya incident au, character dearth mentioned, slow burn, smut, angst, reader is a sorcerer, oral sex, masturbation + more

A/N.. hi this is my first fanfic ever also I posted it on A03 under the same username. keep in mind I’m a beginner at writing lol. like & rebolgs are appreciated | DONT NOT REUPLOAD :D

………………………………………………………………………………….

you and choso where out having lunch discussing your plans for an upcoming mission later that day. It’s been half a year since the shibuya incident, even after the many deaths that took place that night you ended up finding yourself making a new connection later down the line

choso become an ally for jujutsu high short after the incident, first it started off with you two getting place together to go on small missions together outside of Tokyo. When you first heard of the idea of you and choso being partner up you weren’t a big fan of it, everyone seem to connect well off of first interaction and start to enjoy choso company especially after finding out that he is yuji half brother but you? barely even talk/avoided him outside of missions.

“what are you thinking about”? choso asked as he saw your blank expression as you two were waiting on the food to come out “Huh? oh.. just that how much I hate working with you that’s all” you softly smirk at him. you love teasing choso so often that become y’all daily thing to do to each other. One day after you and choso got back from a mission you were about to head out of jujutsu high until you heard fast steps catching up to you.

“hey.. um y/n you have a moment?” choso asked awkward while scratching the back of his head. you then turn around and sign “yeah what is it?” choso honestly wasn’t sure how he should approach you, when y’all get sent on mission its just strictly about the mission no personal stuff about each other lives, nothing.

he kinda took the hint that you didn’t want to conversation about anything outside of that 3 weeks after the incident when you both were on the train headed to koyto and he asked how long you been a sorcery at jujutsu high and you responded with “why do you care just let’s just do our jobs, the faster the better”

every since then choso didn’t dare to bring up anything after that until the day he generally was curious and had enough of this ‘only talk during and about the mission thing’ he wasn’t a pushy person but he can bet there has to be more to you than this nonchalant mask you are pulling because of the story’s yuji told him when he himself first started out and you and gojo teach him. he had to know why you were so casual with everyone but not him

“Sorry to bother you y/n, don’t take this the wrong way but did I genuinely do something to offend you? every since I came to jujutsu high and going on mission I feel like you been bothered by my presence of that makes any sense” your response could go south either way choso though he didn’t know if you would just curse him out or just turn around and keep ignoring him like you been. “Are you that much of new puppy that you need everyone attention and become friends?”

“hey wait a min don’t go yet” as you turned your head a little bit choso could see your eyes get glossy. “Let me go pls” you barley spoke. A single tear fell down your face. “I’m sorry if it’s becaus-“ choso was about to finish his sentence until gojo loudly interrupted them.

“Heyy choso how have you been? Oh y/n you there too? did you file the last mission yet I haven’t seen it yet if you did” gojo said when he got a glimpse of your hair behind choso back as he was walking up to y’all. as soon as you heard gojo voice you quickly pull your wrist back from choso and he let go.

you then quickly rush off campus and into your car. “Hey come back” choso shouted. You thought how embarrassing that was,now you wouldn’t even dare show your face in front of choso now after he seen you in that state. “I guess she really doesn’t like doing reports after all” gojo said confused.

part 2 coming soon… don’t forget to like & reblog :)

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gojo-mochi · 1 year ago

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Monster trio meeting the girl of their dreams but turns out they are a marine

Pls and ty:)

Have a great day<3

Prompt: Monster trio meeting the girl of their dreams but turns out they are a marine.

A/N: First time at angst! WOOO (ง ื▿ ื)ว I kinda went overboard with this one…. So it took kinda long aha, Hope you enjoy tho anon if you’re still here!

Content Warning: Fem!reader, Angst, Mild blood, Reader is a new marine fresh out of training, Reader is all slightly different in each head canon since each person’s dream girl wouldn’t be the same, hurt/ no comfort.

Not Proofread

Word Count: 5.4K

Luffy:

First Meeting:

You were on your first job, patrolling around the island to catch any criminals or report any bad deeds. With rifle clutched in hand, you practiced your stomping routine all-thru out the day, eyes darting around to scan the whole area. That was when you came across a boy? Or a young man now that you glance over his ahem nice build, passed out in a alleyway. You immediately rush over to him, kneeling down and lifting up his head and checking for any obvious wounds or blood.

“Foo-food….so hungry..”

You heard him faintly groan out, followed by a loud stomach rumble. ‘Poor thing must not had eaten in a while..’ You pondered looking at his thin frame. You gently rest his head on your lap while you pull out your lunch bag. As soon as the stranger heard the sound of your bento opening, his eyes shot open, drooling pooling out of his mouth. You stifled a giggle at the sight, taking a pair of chopsticks and picking up one of the fried chicken you made for lunch. Offering it to the strange man, his lips seem to ‘stretch’ out and enveloped the whole chicken piece in a flash.

“Mm... yummy!”

You didn’t think more on that strange moment when the man urgently asked for more by making grabby hands motion and pouting out his lips. You couldn’t back your giggles at this point, once again picking up your chopsticks to hand feed this man. Soon, your whole lunch box was emptied and the man leans up, carefully positioning his straw-hat on top of his head. ‘That looked oddly familiar to me but why..’ Your thoughts get broken though as the strange man loudly smacks his lips together and turns to give you a thumbs up with a wide smile. “The meal tasted amazing! Almost as good as Sanji’s cooking!”

You blush a bit at his compliments, you always cooked for yourself so hearing someone saying that they enjoyed you’re cooking was new… and pleasant. “Ah! I forget to introduce myself.” You got up and dust off your pants, it was a new Marine Uniform they were testing out so you hate to get it dirty so quickly. “My name is y/n, may I asked for yours?” You reach out our hand in your introduction and the man’s hands quickly came to hold them.

‘Warm…’ You thought silently.

“Luffy!” He shakes your hand up and down rapidly, “You’re really pretty and nice by the way! You should come meet my crew! I’ll have Sanji cook something as a Thank You for giving me your lunch!” He spoke out in quick succession, not giving you time to respond back. Though you can feel your face heating up at hearing him call you ‘pretty’. “Oh right! I was supposed to meet up with my crew somewhere! I need to run now but see me later, yeah?!” You could only stare at his back as he starts to rush off somewhere.

Luffy’s POV

‘That food was so yummy! And the lady was so nice and pretty and wow!’ Luffy’s thoughts usually went a mile a min, especially now expect it was all about you. He couldn’t wait to tell his Nakamas about what happened today. He thought about how soft your lap was to rest on, how he enjoyed every single bite of food you gave him, how even more delicious the food was when it was coming from your hands. He had a skip in his steps as he ran around the island looking for any signs of his crew, ‘I hope y/n likes Sanji’s cooking! Maybe so much that she’ll even join us!’

A/N: Luffy not the type to fall in love in first sight, so idk how to exactly write out him meeting his dream girl other than this ｡･ﾟ･(ﾉД`)ヽ

Second Meeting:

You were alerted by your Commander about a group of pirates causing havoc near the docks. You dash to the dock ready to deal damage to these Pirates. ‘How dare they! Terrorizing a small island like this one!’ You thought angrily as you get closer to your destination. You soon come across a giant blue haired robot person? And a green haired man wielding three swords. Your allies were being slashed down right in front of you. You brought out your rifle and took aim at the pirates ready to fire at a moment notice.

When you noticed a certain straw hat jumping over everyone. Your heart was thumping, blood rushing to your head as you screamed out; “Luffy!?”

Luffy turned to look at you in midair and grinned wide, stretching his arms impossibly long to where you were. He crash land in front of you with a loud ‘thud’. “Y/N! You made it!” He yelled near your ears excitedly, wrapping his arms around you in a tight hug. You get shoved him off and point your rifle at him with shaking hands. He gives you a sad puppy eyed look. “What’s wrong?” He tilts his head in a way that almost makes you stumble in your step. But you hold fast; “What’s wrong?! What’s wrong is that you are damn Pirate!”

You raise up your rifle again in fury. Did he not know that you were a Marine this whole time? …No, he must had known and pretended to be sick so you lowered your guard down or something, after all, all pirates are the same. You blink away the tears in your eyes, the expression on Luffy’s face almost tricked you into believing that he was clueless in all of this. “Surrender now! Or else I will use this!”

You get slammed by a reindeer or some sort of reindeer liked monster. Your back hits the ground with a hard “Oof.” Escaping your lips, through bleary eyes you can barely see Luffy reaching out for you before he was pulled away by that swordman. Another Marine goes to help you back up, you wince at seeing how your forearms were all scratched and bleeding now. With only rage fueling your voice you scream as the Pirate’s ship was getting ready to sail away. “This isn’t over Luffy! You’re dead to me!”

Luffy’s POV

The Sunny was sailing away and everyone on the ship was safe and accounted for. They made off with bags of food as well. Sanji even said he was making a feast tonight. So why did Luffy feel so sad… He only known for a couple of mins but those memories kept replaying in his head. Your warmth and your kindness, it was replaced with the vision of you screaming out and on the ground bruised.

His crewmates were quick to noticed Luffy’s new attitude, him slumped over on the railing just looking at the island as it fades out of view. When anyone came up to ask, Luffy didn’t give them a answer on why he was feeling this way, he just was. He hoped that the next time you guys end up meeting that it would turn out better but the bitter feeling in the back of his mind told him that you wanted him dead. Why did you have to turn out to be a Marine… he then wondered if he could change your mind and turn you into a pirate instead.

With that new plan in mind, he cheered up a bit and went to bother Sanji about when dinner was ready. He kept rubbing at his chest the whole day though, trying to suppress the ache he felt inside.

Zoro:

First Meeting:

You were cursing your way into shelter as the rain poured down on you. Keeping your sword close to your body as you huddled underneath a tree. ‘Damn it, of course it would rain as soon as I finished with my sword training for the day.’ You cursed silently, wringing out the sleeves on your robe. You always switch out of your usual Marine’s uniform when training but now you’re began to regret that choice. The Marine’s uniform were waterproof to a degree, given how much of your work was out on the sea.

You huff out, rolling your eyes to the dark overcast, flipping it off like it would make any sort of difference. You heard a snort coming off from the left. You jump up a bit in shock, glad that you’re commander wasn’t here to see you be so careless enough not to notice another presence near you. You glare at the new person, not out of any hatred, just annoyance. Why were you even annoyed at this person? You don’t really have an answer for that…

You take a good look at the stranger, he have oddly colored green hair, a scar over his eye, and three swords hung by the side of his hip. He sends over a small smirk when he catches you staring for too long at his open chest. “A picture would last longer, you know?” He taunted with a slight tilt of his head. You feel a fierce blush coming up and you tore your eyes away from watching the rain droplets go down on his admittedly nice abs. You faked a cough and straighten your shoulders out.

“I was just making sure you weren’t a threat or anything like that.” You grunted out. You blush even more when the stranger gave you a toothy smirk in response as he hums. The hums almost came out as growl from how deep it sounded. “So, do you still think I am threat then little missy?” His grey eyes now scanning over your body. Your hands itches towards your sword but you stop yourself.

“I’m Y/N, and I’m…” You took a small pause, “I’m sigh sorry about before, thinking you were a threat and all that.” You did feel bad for glaring at him for no reason, after all he didn’t do anything to deserve it. The man shifted his position, letting his robe fall open, exposing even more of his tanned skin and scarred muscles. “Tis’ fine, it’s not like I blame you for staring.” Oh, alright, now you don’t feel bad for glaring at him.

“I was-wasn’t staring!” You quickly snapped back, which cause the still unnamed man to barked out a laugh. You start to grind your teeth, ‘Fuck him and his stupid attractive laugh too.’ You thought as you turn to find shelter elsewhere. You felt a tug as the man grabbed on to your wrist and pulled you back.

“Hey! Wait! I uh fuck.” He lets you go. “Look, I didn’t mean to upset you alright. So don’t leave ok?” His voice sounded a bit softer than before. When you turned around, you catch sight of a small blush painting over his face. It made your heart skip a beat. You shuffles back to your spot, next to the man, letting your shoulder bump against his tall frame. “I didn’t know that you wanted me back that badly.” You jested, feeling off the warm feeling crawling up.

You heard another snort come off the man, and then the warmth of his broad hand coming to ruffle your hair. He didn’t say anything in return though, just letting the pitter patter of the raindrops wash over you two. It took a while and some brushing of hands and fake coughing for one of you to speak up again. “So.. what type of sword style do you use?” The man grunted and looked over to the sword by your hip. You drummed your fingers on the hilt of your blade nervously at his intense gaze.

“I came from a place called Mount Hua, and I was taught the Plum Blossom sword technique there.” You tilt your head back to glance as his expression. Most people would scoff when they see a woman with a sword so you wonder how he’s reacting. It catches you by surprise to see him so intrigued by your words. “Could you show me once this damn rain goes away?”

He sounded serious about it, not like all the others who taunted or mocked your style. ‘Plum Blossom style? Heh! Sounds girly enough for a woman to use! What does it do? Make everything pretty? Bahahah!’ Your thoughts race to all the things people said to you before. You faked another cough and tried to secretly wipe away your tears that were threatening to fall. You just settled for a nod, looking away, hoping that the man doesn’t see your tears. You hear some shifting beside you and the hand returns upon your head.

His callous fingers gently sunk into your hair, scraping against your scalp tenderly, it almost makes your purr from the sensation. He stayed silent, just letting his hand convey all his feelings. The rain soon ended after this moment, you didn’t know if you wanted to be happy or cry that it was over. You step out from under the shelter and give a head nod to the man. You wondered what a good time to ask for his name, it feels awkward to ask after so long.

The man gave a nod back and began to follow you as you walk to a good place to show off your sword technique. You suck in a shaky breath, readying your sword stance. Closing your eyes and steadying your mind, your body goes thru the motions you repeated so many times before. Right foot first, swing your sword out into an arc, twist your body and follow that arc, another step into a whole dance. Move your body like the swaying petals that descend down from Mount Hua.

Since your eyes were closed the whole time, you didn’t get to see the awestruck expression the man wore on his face the entire time. Mouth slightly agape and his one eye never leaving your form as you make the plum blossoms bloom around you with each swing. It was breath-taking and utterly ethereal, the man thought to himself. His own hand itching to try and copy your sword style. He wanted desperately to see more of this technique and more of you if he was being honest.

Once you were done, the plum blossom softly fall down around you, it made you look heavenly. You tried to not let out a wheeze, controlling your breaths unless your heartrate fully calmed down. Your turns toward the man as he was walking to you, mouth open to say something but cut off by the ringing of your transponder snail. Pere Pere Pere…. Click. You take out the snail from your pocket, it’s eyes opens as your commander’s shouts out. “Y/N! Where are you!? We have a code red down at the docks! Hurry over now!” You stammered out an yes while shooting the stranger a apologetic look. You quickly took foot to the docks, your duties outweigh everything else.

Zoro’s POV

His hand reached out before his mind could react but you were already gone. ‘Shit..’ Zoro looked back to the plum blossoms scattered on the ground. Picking one up between his fingers, rolling it around he sighs. Hand going to rest on his sword hilt he wonders if he could make flowers bloom like you could. His mind flashed back to your sorrowful expression when he asked you to show off your technique. You must had a hard time in the past, his fist balled up in fury at the thought of someone… anyone making you cry like that. He shook his heads as these kind of thoughts filled his head, it was unusual for him to feel such strong emotions and for someone he barely knows as well. He rolls his shoulders and tries not to delve deeper into these new emotions, wondering where the hell his crew was. (A/N: Zoro was supposed to meet his crew an hour ago but he got lost ofc ヽ(~_~()

Second Meeting:

Clang! Your sword comes down and clashed against the large blue metal arm of the cyborg. “Woah there lady! Why don’t we all calm down and talk about this, yeah?” You stepped back when arms sprout from the ground trying to grab your ankles. “We can talk about this once you all are all in handcuffs!” You ready to swing again but you stumble in you step when you caught sight of a familiar green head of hair. A fellow officer catches you before you fully fall flat on your face. “Get it together L/N!” You nod at your fellow officer.

Fighting down the urge to puke when the green haired stranger goes to join the Pirate Crew’s side. Your lips pressed together when you see him take out his swords against the marines. Your body tense and you made your way to the man. Swish! Clang!Zoro’s eye widen when you clashed swords. “Y/N? Wh-what? Why the hell are you here?!” Veins forming on his forearms as he tried to push back against your attack. “I should be asking you that! If I had known that you were a damn pirate I would never had-!” Your breath falters as your eyes start to well up with tears. Zoro let out a hiss when you managed to nick his arm a bit.

You could feel that he was holding back, not putting his full strength into his attacks. You growled out, “Stop doing that! Are you going easy on me just became I’m a girl?!” You swung down again with a heavy arc. Zoro jumped back shock and then anger paints over his face. “I wouldn’t hold back just cause of that! You don’t know a damn thing about me!” He snarled out, accidently putting some of his haki into his next swing, the force pushed you all the way across the battlefield. Your Commander caught you before you fell into the ocean.

Your head was dizzy and your ears was ringing, you felt your Commander’s hands on your back and neck as he props you up a bit. His visage was hazy and you could slightly hear the words, “Y/N?! Ar- -ou wi—me!? Y/N!!” The last thing you saw was Zoro in the distance, jumping up on the Pirate’s ship and leaving. You soon pass out in your Commander’s arms afterwards.

Zoro’s POV

He was getting patched up in Chopper’s office, heart still thumping from the visage of you all bloodied on the ground. From his own attack as well. He hiss out when Chopper applied the medical salve on a particularly grisly wound. “Sorry Zoro! Are you alright?” Chopper fretted over him, going to check over every inch of his body again. Zoro only grunted a “Is ok.” In return and stood up. He waves off Chopper’s worries and ignores the stinging stares on his back from the rest of his crewmates once he walked out on deck.

He goes up to the Crow’s Nest, pretending the paining in his arms weren’t there. He looks at all his gym equipment and slumps his shoulders, opting to just lay on the ground. ‘A nap sounds fine I guess…’

His hand goes inside his robe to pull out a single plum blossom petal, he rolls between his fingers, admiring the soft shades of colors. His mind goes back to you, your cute expression when he teased you, your form when dancing, and you.. dead on the ground because of him. He shuts his eyes and holds the petal close to his chest and goes to sleep. Wondering if things went differently, where you would be now…

Sanji:

First Meeting:

You pulled the short stick and got tasked with the duty of groceries shopping for the rest of your team this week. You squint at the long list your Commander gave you. “Apples, Bread (Make sure to get Rye NOT WHEAT), Meat, (Beef, Pork, Lamb if you find it), Bruss-oof.” You hit the back of a tall blonde stranger, stumbling backwards you shut your eyes preparing for the crash landing. Only to find yourself in the arms of the same stranger you bumped into. “Woah there! Are you alright ma chérié?” A smooth voice asked. You open you eyes to find the face of the stranger, a handsome man with a curly brow.

With his arms wrapped securely around your waist he brings you back up to your feet. You stuttered out an apology and bowed to your savior. He chuckles and bowed back with a more flawless posture. “No need to thank me, I will always help a beautiful lady in need.” He then put his hand out in asking for yours. You blush at the compliment and bashfully gave him your hand, he then proceeded to plant a soft kiss on the back of your hand which cause you to blush even further.

“May I ask why you were in such a big rush, my dear?”

“O-oh! I was getting groceries and I was looking at my list and not paying any attention, which I am so sorry for again!” As you explained your reasoning you went to show the list that held all the items you needed to buy. Expect it wasn’t in your hands anymore or your pockets for that matter. You pat around your whole body looking for that very long and important list. Finding nothing in the end, yours hand start to clench as your breathing became more unstable. “Shit, Shit, SHIT! This can not be happening to me right!” Your whole body at this point starts to shake, when you feel warm hands on your shoulders and a calming voice guiding you down.

“Hey there, look at me alright, and breath with me. You need to breath, miss…. That’s it… slow and steady… good job.”

Your breathing starts to calm down as you listen to the voice. Shoulders still slightly shaking as you feel the same warm hands as before pat your head and began to wipes away tears you didn’t know was falling. You start hiccupping as the man pulls you into his arms, rubbing small soothing circles on your back. Once you calmed down enough to speak, you look at up the man, still being held in his arms.

“Th-thank you for this… I’m sorry for—”

He stops you before you could finish your apology. “Don’t feel like you need to apologize my dear, it’s a man’s duty to always help dries a lady’s tears as well.” His head still petting your hair so sweetly it makes your heart squeeze a bit. Still he was a stranger no matter how handsome he is, so you reluctantly push away from his firm chest and try not to think too much about the look on his face as you did. “It just that I lost the list of all the things I need to get for my group and I’m not sure what to do now…”

The man hummed for a bit, closing his eyes before he said. “Why don’t I help you out with your shopping? Not to brag but I am quite the talented chef so this would be a easy task for me to do.” He grinned down at you. You start to refuse stating that you didn’t want to bother him but he had already grabbed your hand into his and was pulling you towards the marketplace. “Just tell me about who we’re buying for and let me take care of it, ok sweetheart?” Your heart skips so many beats hearing him call you sweetheart, just so casually like it was something that was normal between you two.

You brush aside the nickname and your beating heart to explain some of your teammates tastes and dislike. The more you talk the more comfortable you got, telling him about how each of your teammates have something they actively hate and will not even touch a dish if it has that certain ingredient in it. Throwing your arms in the air as you told the story of how two of them got into a fight over who ate the last of the mangos. He chuckles at the story or at how you were acting, you weren’t so sure but you were enjoying the time spent with him.

He easily explained what was best to get, how to pick the best fruit, cut of meat, and fresh fish, he also showed you how to haggle for the best prices as well. You giggled when he went back and forth with the old fishermen, his hand still held on tightly to yours the whole time. You felt a small squeeze every time the fishermen retorted back saying the price was firm. In the end he did get a couple of free fishes with his order. He was swinging his hand that held yours as he happily carried the numerous amount of bags all in his other arm.

You wanted to share some of the load but he was adamant about carrying it all for you but he denied every moment you asked. His hand was oh so warm and caring, when you reached your building you didn’t want to let go. And it seems like he didn’t either, he just silently drops the bags off and hold steady to you hand before letting go. Your fingers slipping past each other slowly until you were freed, free but cold. You just stayed there in the middle of your doorway, you both don’t even know the other’s name but you feel like there was something that was bubbling just below the surface.

However, before anything could happen the both of you heard a huge explosion come from somewhere in the city. The make the ground beneath shake heavily and your ears ring from the aftershock. You look around frantically to see any signs of enemies or anything that could be dangerous while the man did the same while shielding you. You shake off the same feeling in your chest as you went to Transponder Snail to check in with your team. “I have to go check on my friends! Please stay here and stay safe!” The man yells as he starts to run towards the source of the explosion.

You yelled after him but he was already long gone, the Transponder snail still ringing in your hand. You bite you lips in worry for your teammates and the strange man you gotten close to.

Sanji’s POV:

While he hates to leave a beautiful young lady behind, he can’t help but worry about his friends. So while his legs went on autopilot to his friends his mind wandered back over to the marketplace and to you, how his hand fits so perfectly on your waist, the way your smile seem to set his heart aflame each time you directed at him, it was a different sort of feeling from what he usually get when seeing a pretty lady. It both terrified and excited him at the same time, he thought of what he could do when he needed to leave the island later. Would you accept a vivre card from him a stranger, was that too much? Maybe just giving you his number would be fine… or maybe you could join the crew as his assistant? He need to convince Luffy first but also you but his mind couldn’t help but think of all the scenario of you and him together.

He finally reached source of the smoke and found his friends being attacked by a group of marines. He hurries in to help fight them off.

Second Meeting:

The Transponder snail opened up it eyes and you heard your teammate shout out your name. You responded back right away, asking how was everyone and where they were. You voice came out in rasps as you didn’t know that you were holding your breath this whole time. You slide down to the floor upon hearing that everyone was safe from the blast. Tears falling from all the stress, but you steadied yourself once your teammate asked if you could come help. You stifled some sniffles and told them that you’ll be there soon.

You got into your uniform and ready your weapon by your side as you head to the meeting area, the source of the explosion. ‘Where that kind stranger went to….I hope he’s ok..’ Thoughts like these race in your mind as you dash across the town. You hear the sound of fighting before you could spot anyone. You get out your weapon and hurry to the battle to find… The same stranger.

Your heart stops in your throat, your mind was spinning, and you could barely hear you’re the fight over you, as you eyes set on the man. He looked good, you hate to admit it, as he was going around kicking your teams’ ass, but dam does he look good doing it. You snapped out of it when you got pulled back by your commander as a strange and buff Raccoon dog(?) was barreling your way. You landed with a oof and grunted out a sorry as your commander went back to help the others.

Your mind was still foggy over why he man was helping the pirates and what that meant for the two of you. The two of you?? You only knew him for what? A couple of hours? Why were you thinking so hard on this, it obvious that he’s a pirate and that he needs to go down, just like every other pirate out there. You keep telling yourself that as you head straight towards him with your weapon pointed. “Halt!”

The man stopped in his tracks as he turns to meet you, his eye goes wide but then he immediately smiles wide. “Ma chérié! You’re here!” He stretch his arms out wide, as if he was waiting for a hug. You almost falter in your step as you felt your cheeks warm up. You pretended it was from anger and not anything else as you take a step back and faced your weapon towards him. “Surrounded now Pirate! I won’t ask twice!”

His arms was still out stretched but the smile on his face fell. It seems like he was struggling to say something but then the same Raccoon dog you saw before was crashing towards you again but you managed to step away just in time. “Get away from Sanji!” ‘Sanji… so that’s his name..’

You land on your feet with a hard thud. Growling as you try to swipe at the large creature, almost landing a hit when Sanji stops you with his leg. “Wait! Please let talks this out, my dear, we could work this out.” You pushed away his leg and yelled back. “Talk what out?! You’re a pirate! We have nothing between us!”. As soon as Sanji’s face fell, you regret what you said, heart twisting in your chest. One of your teammate came to stand beside you and take aim at the two, shooting at them while they ran back to their ship. You curse them out as the ship’s sails unfurled and they began to leave. Trying desperately to stop the tears from falling as your heart reach out to him while your mind was yelling at you.

Sanji’s POV:

He just stayed in the kitchen for most of the week after leaving that island. Distracting himself by preparing new dishes, snacks, drinks, anything that occupy his hands and his mind. Usopp and Nami was worried about him and the food storage but Sanji waved them off. He puffed out another smoke from his nth cigarette. Looking at his hand and trying to remember the warmth he felt when yours was holding it. He sighs, putting out his current cigarette and lighting up another one. As his thoughts pulled him back that marketplace and the sound of your laughter rings in his ears.

#banner by cafekitsune thank you!#₍ᐢ. ̫.ᐢ₎ softy writes #SORRRY IT TOOK SO LONG #angst #sanji x you #sanji x reader #zoro roronoa x reader #zoro x you #zoro x reader #luffy x you #luffy x reader #one piece #one piece x reader #one piece headcanons

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saintslewis · 10 months ago

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❝ 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐃 | 𝐋𝐇𝟒𝟒 ❞

pairing: sir lewis hamilton x black fem!reader

summary: it has been a dream to have the perfect family but a nightmare occurs and you question the love you receive.

warnings: angst, mentions of death, descriptions of pain, loads of crying.

saint’s team radio 🎀: we’re getting sad with this one!! buckle up and thank you anon for requesting this! <3 sorry for any typos!

tags: @non-stop-imagines @arshiyuh @queenshikongo3 @mauvecherie-writes @lorarri @goldsainz @exotic-iris13 @alika-4466 @yeea-nah

pls like, reblog and comment! 🤍

The nursery was filled with so many gifts from the baby shower that you felt tired just at the thought of organising it all.

Looking up at the wall, her name was painted in light pink paint with cursive that you insisted would make you smile. Her cot was filled to the brim with stuffed animals that you guaranteed would last her a lifetime and just at the thought of your little princess entering the world in six months made you rub your belly with happiness, feeling her slightly kick as if to say “Hello.”

Oh you could just remember the exact moment you found out you were pregnant, the look on Lewis’ face was filled with love and adoration. Thanking you for bearing your child, the start of the family the both of you had been dreaming about. The gender reveal was celebrated intimately, the simple slice of the cake revealing the pink sponge cake within, the tears overflowing at the thought of you having a baby girl. The world finding out that you were expecting a picture of the slice of cake with a little onesie next to it, causing a frenzy at the sight of the 8 time world champion and his wife celebrating a new life soon.

The memories were as sweet as can be, Lewis being there every step of the way. He would panic when you weren’t by his side during race weekends but he knew you were in the comfort of your family and friends and that you were loved beyond measure. His love towards you was always growing stronger every day, his excitement for his family had always caused butterflies in his stomach. He hugged you every chance he got, he spoke to your pregnant belly with the softest of voices and your heart swelled up.

You were both more than ready to begin parenthood with each other.

Sitting down on the couch with a few groans, you reached for the remote whilst Lewis was in the kitchen making an afternoon snack. It was a chill afternoon, a few phone calls from your friends here and there but it was spent in the comfort of your home. You carefully placed your braids into a bun and in that moment, you felt a slight cramp around your womb. Taking it as a sign that you were most likely dehydrated, you stood up to get a glass of water.

“Babe, are you okay? D’you need help?” Lewis asked, slowing down his chopping up of fruits to watch you walk into the kitchen. “Yeah I’m good. Just felt a normal pain. Don’t stress.” You reassured him, walking quite slowly as you felt the pain coming back.

You managed to make it to the island when the pain hit you stronger than before causing you to hold onto the marble surface, your legs weakening as you continued to stand. “Y/n, let’s sit you down. I’ll get whatever you need.” Lewis said, coming around his side of the island to help you sit down but you waved him off, barely able to construct a coherent sentence.

“Please.” You managed to let out before groaning loudly, holding onto your swollen belly. He was stressing out, holding onto your hands as he began to guide you towards the couch. One step out, you let out a scream of pain, your legs giving out on you but Lewis was there to catch you. Now carrying you onto the couch, he gathered all the cushions to make you a little comfortable.

“I think I’ll go get the car ready for the hospital.” He said, holding onto your face as tears rolled down in every direction. One hand on your belly and the other on his hand, you cried out in pain. “She’s n-not moving, Lew.” You croaked out, the worst thoughts filling your mind. Was your baby okay? Could she feel the pain that you were experiencing.”

“No, my angel. Don’t say that, please don’t say that. She’s okay, our baby is okay.” Tears filled Lewis’ eyes as he tried to convince himself and you that all was okay. Your eyes were squeezed shut as the pain spread across your lower waist, your hips aching. He looked all over your body for any signs of shaking and once his eyes got to the crotch of your white cotton pants, his heart dropped. Blood slowly spread and he didn’t want to think of that. Nothing could’ve prepared him to experience this. You both have done everything by the book, everything to keep your little princess safe.

Lewis couldn’t think of the worst. Maybe these pants had been this stain for a while but he knows better than anyone that you would know of any stain on any of your clothing. He was panicking, he was stressed. He couldn’t let this happen, not after the both of you had been dreaming of your own family.

He grabbed the nearest car keys and picked you up bridal style once again and carefully rushed you to the large enough car, laying you down onto the backseat as he rushed back inside to get your hospital bag and both of your phones. Everything was a blur, driving off to the nearest hospital, keeping the ac cold so that you could stay awake. Calling your mom to let her know, not wanting her panic but still warned her along with his mom.

Rushed you into emergency. Parked the car. Watched you roll away on a stretcher, barely awake but your hands still held onto your belly. 40 minutes. In that moment, your mother arrived and so did his. Your best friend arrived and so did his. Your younger sister gathering her tears and carried one of your baby’s stuffed animals as a source of comfort. Everyone was waiting in the waiting room, trying to console Lewis but he wanted to be as calm as he could be. For your sake.

Dr Watts, your paediatrician, rounded the corner of the waiting room with a tissue patting her tears as she stuffed it into her scrubs. She had made eye contact with Lewis and right in that moment, he knew.

“Uhm everyone, Y/n unfortunately suffered a miscarriage. We had to extract the baby from her womb, it was internal bleeding from the womb and I will let the father of the baby know of other information.” She sniffled. Dr Watts had been helping you throughout your pregnancy, how excited you were for motherhood and seeing that being taken away from you was heartbreaking.

“Does she know?” Your mom spoke up, rubbing Lewis’s shoulders as his head was in his hands. Shaking her head, the paediatrician spoke up. “Y/n is very close to waking up. Two people can be in the room with her.”

The walk to your hospital room was dreadful, everyone else staying behind to let you and Lewis have this moment together. Your eyelids felt heavy but you still managed to keep them open, your husband holding your hand with drips connected to it. His eyes looked empty, only moving to look at you with a look you couldn’t quite grasp. Watts gathered up the courage to tell you the bad news, your stomach dropping at the moment you heard that she had already let your body.

“I killed my own creation.” You whispered but Lewis heard you and immediately shook his head. “Sweetheat, it is not your fault. Please don’t blame yourself, I’m begging.” He tried to help but he had very little strength in him as well. “She’s gone forever. I caused her to leave. I walked around and ruined everything.” You rasped out.

It was inevitable that you were going to blame yourself. Your bump slowly started falling as you cried to yourself all night. You chased everyone out, keeping your hand encased in Lewis’ as he cried alongside you.

Once discharged from the hospital, you felt suffocated by your thoughts. You hadn’t spoken to anyone, not even the doctor and not even Lewis who was losing his mind over you going non-verbal. He knew you made your late daughter your entire life and to see the light get sucked out of you was heart-wrenching. You reached home and sat in the nursery with him, crying your heart out but still refusing to speak. You slept there for most of the week after, you ate there and one night, you faced Lewis.

“I’m sorry.” You spoke softly as you leaned over to hug him. Without hesitation, he welcomed you into his arms and you felt the love he was giving within your soul. You now knew you were loved beyond words when you were around him. “Don’t be sorry, I’ve got you forever.” He reassured you, kissing your forehead and slightly tightening his hold on you.

saint speaks: omg y’all i cried while writing this, hope y’all enjoyed!

#saint writes #celebrating 600 with saint!#lewis hamilton x black reader #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton fanfics #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton angst #lewis hamilton fic #f1 x black!reader #f1 imagines #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #SoundCloud

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fallingforfelix · 26 days ago

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❛❛out of touch❞

모래시계를 통해 미끄러지는 모래처럼, 단절은 우리 손끝으로 스며듭니다.

disconnection seeps through our fingertips, like sand slipping through the hourglass.

.° ༘🎍⋆🍾₊˚ෆ

synopsis: kinktober day #4 — hand fetish (cheirophilia)

pairing: felix x minho

content: 18+/explicit (mature audiences only), tad bit of angst but not too much, smut, college au, second person view, pwp (porn with plot), emotional distress, lgbtq+ content, mature relationships, skinship, profanities, potential triggers for anxiety or low self-esteem

warnings: voyeurism, masturbation, physical affection (hugging, hand holding), orgasm, erotic fantasies, pet names (jagi)

word count: 3.2k (3200) + 3 photos (text messages)

note: are half of felix’s emotions overreactions in this? absolutely!! but i haven’t been feeling the best lately so what better way to get my anger out than by writing angst in my works. so i rly liked this one, until it got to the smut. definitely not my best!! there’s a typo in one of the messages so pls ignore that. this was supposed to be a triple post…but i’ll just post the other two when i wake up in the morning.

inspired by: like me better by @cattolino

song reference: touch by katseye

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

the way minho played the guitar so flawlessly was astonishing, no doubt. and felix would’ve admitted that the tune was beautiful, had he not been distracted.

the way minho’s veins protruded like they were trying to escape his skin, made felix’s brain spin. he couldn’t help but feel almost…insecure? his gaze kept flickering between his hyung and his own hands that were clasped together on his lap. his miniature, feminine-like hands. no wonder minho hyung has girls all over him.

and mixed with the insecurity was something else. something felix couldn’t quite pinpoint, but it gnawed at his heartstrings and made him feel giddy. felix chewed on his inner cheek and twiddled his fingers, his gaze following minho’s hands, now completely blocking out the music.

a while seemed to have passed, but never long enough, because minho spoke up, resting his hands on odd ends of the guitar, his veins remaining inanimate.

“so, did you like it? i know i’m not that good. but i think i’m getting the hang of it. jisung has been teaching me and he’s amazing. you know that emo music kid? you must, he’s in your year.”

oh, so you let other boys see your hands like that?

felix hadn’t even had time to grasp the thought before it passed, replaced by the urge to reply.

“wow, you learn quickly,” felix mentally cursed himself for the way his voice sounded so breathy, and he coughed to clear his throat. “uhm, yeah, it’s really nice actually. good tune. the kind that’ll get stuck in your head. i don’t recall ever hearing it, did you compose it?”

“jisung and i did,” and minho’s face broke into a wide grin, highlighting his feline features. “i slept over in his dorm around a week ago and we pulled an all-nighter just writing a bunch of silly songs. he’s actually a composer, did you know that? signed with a label and everything, writing songs for some big names. you’d be surprised when you recognise all the ones he’s credited for, trust me. anyways, these chords happened to be the only ones we wrote down.

“that sounds nice and all, but hey, just remember you’re a dance major. don’t let the music students fuck your brain up or anything like that, okay?” as much as he tried to, felix just couldn’t suppress the layer of jealousy that seeped through his tone, hoping minho didn’t notice it.

minho chuckled. “it seems like you’re talking from experience.”

“oh, you know, hyunjin and his boyfriend changbin. i don’t reckon hyune’s been the same since.”

“well i best keep an eye out, then,” minho expressed a little wink, and felix felt a wave of dread wash over him as he came to terms with the blush warming his face.

there was a pause, a beat of silence. for a moment no one spoke.

minho clapped his hands together, and that was all that it took for felix’s attention to be drawn to the sight of them once again.

“we’ve been here for a while and it’s getting late, shall we head back to the dorms?” he enquired.

“sure,” felix blatantly responded, before standing up.

minho stood too, fixing the guitar back into the case, and felix observed the routine of his veins, watching as minho moved specific fingers to trigger certain vessels unconsciously.

felix hadn’t even realised the older had propped the guitar back onto the rack and was staring intently at him.

“sorry,” felix snapped out of his trance.

“are you all good?” minho asked.

“yeah, yeah. i’m just…i don’t know,” felix figured ‘tired’ was too much of an overused, lame excuse to justify his spacing out.

and with that, minho made his way out of the practice room, felix following suit.

the walk back to their dorms was peaceful, neither of the boys spoke much, only when minho pointed out how the weather was getting noticeably colder did felix converse.

felix, although the extrovert, found content in the silence. it gave him an opportunity to dwell on the conflicting emotions encircling inside him, like an eagle circling its prey.

minho was the type of person that anyone could easily envy. minho’s hands were large and veiny, a stark contrast to felix’s. heck, if they were to hold hands, minho would probably feel like he was holding a child’s.

but there was something else about minho’s hands. something that made felix want to be held by them and never let go. something that ached inside him and caused him to wish for his hyung’s hands to roam over every contour of his body. something…no, i won’t dare let my thoughts roam that far.

felix had always regarded minho as sexy, so why was he only experiencing these perceptions now? fuck that damned guitar.

the sound of loud voices and laughter drew felix out of his mind, coming to face the door within which he resided. turning the handle with minho behind him, he came face to face with three college boys.

hyunjin was lazing on the couch, with his back supported by the arm rest and his legs thrown over changbin’s lap. the couple seemed to be laughing with a third, unknown boy, who had a gummy smile and chubby, rounded cheeks, quite resemblant of a squirrel. he was adorned in a sweater with a red and black horizontal stripe pattern, paired with black jeans which had slits in the knees, black platform boots that would most definitely hurt if he stood on you, and he was almost decorated in a range of silver jewellery.

the boys seemed not to notice felix and minho’s entry, or if they did then they just didn’t care.

“having a little party without me i see, hyune,” felix says as he lays eyes on the scene. he doesn’t comprehend hyunjin’s response, however, for that squirrel-faced stranger brushed past him into minho’s arms.

in that moment, felix’s tender, possessive heart fractured, shattered even, leaving a jagged edge that refused to heal. numbness enveloped him, yet his eyes betrayed him, burning with the temptation to hold back tears. his sorrow weighed down the muscles that he required to smile, preventing him from doing that very thing, stealing the grin that once defined him. the boy who everyone described as a walking sunshine, the epitome of optimism, now felt his inner light dwindle to darkness.

minho hyung doesn’t like skinship.

it wasn’t the fact that minho was hugging other guys, no, he was an adult and allowed to hug whoever he wanted to. it was the fact that everyone knew he despised physical affection.

“minho hyung,” that boy’s words were muffled as he had his head buried in minho’s chest.

“jisungie…” minho’s smile was evident even through his voice.

oh, so that’s jisung. right.

someone had stabbed him in the heart, twisted the knife, and the scar seemed as if it would take an eternity to heal. an overreaction? perhaps. but felix was like that. he cared for his friends, even if that resulted in being possessive at times. as long as he didn’t have an outburst, everything would be okay.

felix turned into the kitchenette to pour himself a glass from the tap. maybe water would help drown out the emotions bubbling in his throat, threatening to consume him in a fit of tears if he didn’t take care of them soon enough.

he sat himself on the top of the counter, legs crossed and cup in hand. his gaze wandered over to changbin and hyunjin, to the picture-perfect couple, that were all over each other, not a single thought to anything else going on in their vicinity. oh, to have a relationship like theirs. felix’s sight shifted from one side of the room to the other, subconsciously eyeing minho and jisung.

they were now facing each other, minho’s hands resting on jisung’s arms, just above the crook of his elbow. the pair were conversing about something felix would’ve liked to have eavesdropped on, but once again, his glare was drawn to minho. the boy was doing that stupid thing he does with his eyes, his beautiful, dark brown, almond-shaped eyes that gave him the illusion of a cat. he was staring deep into jisung’s eyes almost as if he could see through them, past them. funny how someone regarded as intimidating due to their “mean, cold” stare, could hold so much love in their eyes.

felix didn’t know why he did it, but he coughed a fake cough, reminding the couples that he was in the room with them.

“sorry, uhm,” although felix wasn’t really sorry. “hyune do y’know where wooya is?”

“dunno, probably with san or something,” hyunjin responded.

“right. i’m gonna go call him.”

and without another word, felix disappeared into his room, seeking the safety of a relationship-free zone.

he pulled out his phone, but didn’t call wooyoung. he didn’t know what he was going to do, but he knew he didn’t want to be in the atmosphere of the shared living space.

he just sat there on his bed, merely thinking, trying to process everything. fuck having feelings. and maybe a silent tear or two ran down his cheek. he kept trying to tell himself that it wasn’t jealousy that caused him to act this way. but if it wasn’t jealousy, then what could it be? it wasn’t insecurity, he had already been over that.

he came to the conclusion that he’d let his emotions subside and figure them out later when they weren’t as intense. he stood up and made a beeline for the door, planning to grab some of the brownies he made early and return to his room to rewatch deadpool and wolverine.

stepping outside, he quickly wiped away any remaining tears, gently though, so as to not smear any of his makeup.

a figure appeared in the hallway as felix lifted his head, almost scaring him.

“felix! i was just about to come and get you,” jisung gasped.

he had barely even known this kid existed 10 minutes ago, and his friends were already expecting him to be able to usher felix out of his room. and for some reason felix took offence to that.

“oh, it’s just my third eye,” felix retorded, not voicing anything he just thought.

“we’re all just about to head off, actually. thought we’d let you know,” jisung told.

making plans without him? okay, ouch.

“ah, no worries.”

“lixie, did you hear from wooyoung?” hyunjin asked as felix stepped into the light of the room with jisung by his side.

“no, he didn’t pick up,” and felix was ashamed he could lie so easily to one of his best friends. that’ll come in handy. for what? he didn’t know. his brain seemed to be doing most of the thinking, yet not feeding him the information.

“that’s odd. i hope he’s not having too much fun with san,” hyunjin joked.

felix would’ve found it amusing if he was in a better mood, instead he just gave a dry laugh that no one seemed to notice.

minho spoke up as felix was grabbing the brownies from the fridge and heating them up in the microwave.

“hyunjins spending the night at changbin’s, and jisungs roommates with him so their just gonna drop me off at my dorm.”

don’t even bother to invite me? don’t bother, it’s not like i want to be around jisung anyways.

“sound all good? wooyoung will be back soon, i’m sure,” minho asked.

“yeah, that’s fine,” felix responded, almost absent mindedly, seeming all too focused on the way the plate rotated in the microwave.

the ding sound that the machine made when the brownies finished brought felix back to life, and he stared in minho’s direction as soon as he felt the older’s eyes on him.

“want one?” he offered, already stuffing his face but trying to soften the atmosphere.

minho didn’t respond with words, but rather walked himself over to felix, claiming his brownie. felix noticed that the jumper he was wearing before was discarded across one of the chairs that sat on the other side of the kitchen bench. probably because the temperature inside contrasted drastically compared to the weather outside as hyunjin had turned up the heater to an inhumane temperature.

“thanks, jagi,” minho mumbled before biting down on the treat.

jagi?

oh, felix was definitely blushing. he probably just combusted, if that.

purposefully positioning his head so that his hair would cover majority of the redness, he tried to respond with a nonchalant “no problem” but his voice just had to crack.

—

felix eventually had offer the three other boys brownies, and he had to admit that jisung was pretty damn cute when he begged, but felix wouldn’t let him get to his head.

minho calling him ‘jagi’ definitely fucked him up. so much so that felix was now propped up in his bed, scrolling through their chats to find the picture of minho’s hand that he sent when he asked felix which ring he preferred better.

to be honest, felix’s own hand now ached; he didn’t realise how much he and his hyung interacted over text. but his hand ached from something else, something that felix would rather not confront, but his boxers were growing tighter with every thought he had of minho. and his fingers were itching with need and hunger to touch himself, but he needed to wait, the mere concept of minho’s hand wasn’t nearly as good as the real thing.

jisung had made a joke of some sort before they all left, earning a laugh from everyone, even felix had to chuckle along, minho had backhandedly hit felix on his bicep, nothing violent, just a typical reaction that you get from some people when they laugh. and felix wasn’t in pain, but where minho had placed his hand left a mark, a mental mark, one that was burned into felix’s memory forever.

felix finally came across the texts, relishing the tone of their conversation. he didn’t think he’d ever be able to look minho in the eye again soon enough.

minho’s veins in the picture were not nearly as prominent compared to how felix saw them when he was playing the guitar, but he reckoned it was the best he was going to get.

felix and minho had worn the rings everyday since purchase — around a month and a half ago. felix had been wearing his today, only taking it off just then so as to not damage the expensive silver. and he vividly remembered minho adorned in his half of the set, recalling how he felt the cold metal touch his skin when minho had hit him.

felix had slipped off his shirt, leaving him in boxers only. he was positioned on the bed with his elbow supporting his weight, phone in the corresponding hand, with his legs spread open but not outstretched.

his spare hand was resting just above the waistband of his boxers, moving up and down in synchronisation with his breathing. felix took another glance at the photo in his palm, and all control he previously had was thrown out of the window.

he placed his hand on his bulge and slowly began dragging his digits across his clothed length. he sucked in through his teeth, body quivering already. felix stayed like that for a moment, savouring the feeling, easily picturing his hyung’s hands taking charge of his dick.

“fuck, minho,” he gasped, palming his increasingly tight boxers.

felix bit his lip, unaware if he was suppressing the noises or the pain the thought of minho was giving him. a wet patch formed over his crotch, signifying he was dripping with precum.

noting that he had already gone too far to be uneasy, he bucked subconsciously into his hand and let a little whine slip again. felix pictured minho’s pretty face above him, staring into his eyes and stroking his cock almost nonchalantly as the blonde boy beneath him writhed in pleasure. felix could imagine the signature smirk that would dawn minho’s face at the guttural moan felix would make if he swiped his thumb across his leaking tip, pushing him closer to the edge.

but even though it seemed as if minho was there on top of him, the voice in the back of felix’s mind knew that his own hands could never compare to his hyung’s. his lip was bleeding from the pressure of his teeth, but no matter how much friction or weight he applied, his efforts weren’t satisfactory.

felix lifted his hips up, sliding off his boxers with ease, exposing his extremely sensitive cock. he breathed in shakily, body tensing at the sudden exposure to air. he wrapped his fingers around his length, sucking in his cheeks as if he had just tasted something quite sour.

he moaned again as his hand dragged along the freshly-shaven skin, rutting into his palm. he began to pant, eyes watering in desperation. felix’s bed began to creak, but his senses were so overwhelmed he barely payed any attention to being quiet.

“ngh, minho hyung—” felix whimpered like a little slut.

his eyes were closed, forcing the movie in his head to appear clearer, almost realistic. he satisfied his delusions, letting his thumb come intact with the tip of his dick. felix had to grip the side of his bed for support, his movements never halting. his head lolled from the pillow on which it was propped upon, to the wooden headboard, exposing his defined adam’s apple.

minho’s face swam into his vision again, this time jerking felix off at an inhumane pace, whilst prying the boy’s legs open wider. felix mocked the minho in his mind, surprised how fast he could stroke himself and forcing his legs further apart. he internally praised his minho, because felix was now completely zoned out in a state of bliss. obviously with hands like his, minho would be an expert at handjobs. but it brought felix’s brain back to earth for a second, how many people get to experience the very thing i’m dreaming of, lee minho’s holy hands presenting me with pleasure and the best handjob known to mankind. and felix felt a twinge of jealousy, but that only fuelled his desire for more.

“shi-it, minho ah,” felix could feel the brick wall that had slowly constructed itself inside of him begin to crumble and he became a moaning mess.

“minho, minho…please i-i’ve been so good mm, let me c-cum, please…” and felix was tipped over the edge completely, painting his abs in strips of white, not caring about the mess he was making.

he was panting, tongue hanging out, and mouth dry. quite resemblant of a dog. he looked at the picture of minho’s hands laying limply on the bed, as felix had discarded his phone when he went to steady himself. he groaned again at the sight and began to feel that wall being built again.

he pushed himself up on the bed, turning around to grind into the pillow in an attempt to find a more comfortable position for round two.

“do that again.”

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

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honey-comb-xox · 9 months ago

Text

Greened out

Nick Sturniolo x male!stoner!reader

Warnings: Weed, greening out, throwing up, peer pressure, driving while high (don't do that brothers!! Be safe!) - sorry if i missed anything pls lmk if I did!!

A/n: y’all be gentle w this one it’s my first actual writing that isn’t a joke 😭

Summary: y/n greens-out 😶‍🌫️

Y/n sighed as he leaned further back in the lawn chair he found himself in about 3 hours ago. The hot summer air in L.A. was completely different then what he was used to in New York, for some reason it just made blunts hit 10x better.

“Dude you gonna hog that shit or fuckin pass it”

Y/n snaps out of his daze and keeps the smoke circle going, it had been a stressful day. The majority of his day so far has been spent running errands, bringing Nick back and forth to the post office for Space Camp orders, and making sure the Triplets didn’t starve while signing cards for their 6 mil merch drop. It doesn’t sound like a whole lot, but it was definitely draining. Hence the predicament he’s in now.

“Bruh I got one more blunt! Who’s up for a third?”

“Nah man i’m good i gotta drive back to Nicks soon”

“Dude look it’s skinny as shit you’ll be fine, unless you’re pussy”

“Seriously man, i’m not falling for your shit right now”

Y/n did in fact fall for his shit again. Which has led him to his current predicament of how the hell he was supposed to get home, if this was any other area in town then he’d just leave his car. But of course it wasn’t and on top of all that there was not a single sober person he trusted to drive his car to Nicks. There’s really only one option…

“Alright guys I think imma head out” Y/n groaned while stretching up

“Be careful driving back man!”

Y/n sighs as he starts his car preparing for a long ride back home.

~Timeskip~

Y/n stumbles out of his car while trudging up to the front door. After messing with his keys for a few minutes he finally finds the key Nick gifted him a couple of weeks back.

“Nick! I’m back!” Y/n exclaimed

“Hey! Matt and Chris just went out to get dinner. Did you eat?” Nick says going in for a hug.

“Nah I just got back from Jetts place”

“Yeah I can tell. How much did you guys smoke?” Nick coughs from the stench of weed radiating of off Y/n

“I don’t know…like three, 2 ½ blunts” Y/n responds nonchalantly

“THREE? Please don’t tell me you drove back here right after”

“Well I didn’t really have a choice. I couldn’t just leave my car there” At this point that ‘mini’ blunt is starting to hit a lot more than Y/n expected it to. Nick keeps rambling on, but this all goes through one ear and out the other because now it’s either he focuses on what Nicks saying or not throwing up.

“Are you even listening to me right now? You know what, whatever just tell me what you want from Canes so I can tell Matt and Chris”

“Nah I’m good I think, I actually gotta go to the bathroom real quick” Y/n paled. The thought of food was enough to send him over the edge.

Nick looks questionably at his boyfriend, but then brushes it off and rolls his eyes. The moment of silence is broken by groans from the bathroom.

“Babe you okay?” Nick hollers

Y/n doesn’t respond.

“Babe!” Nick shouts once again

Again no response. Nick runs to the bathroom to find his boyfriend curled up near the toilet.

“Oh my god! Babe are you okay?”

Y/n only groans in response. Nick sits down and rubs his back soothingly. Y/n goes to turn to Nick only to find the room rapidly spinning around him which only furthers his nausea. This carries on for another 5 minutes.

“Oh my god. I’m never smoking weed again” Y/n whines while slumping against Nick

“Yeah right, I’m gonna go grab you some water and your toothbrush from my room” Nick laughs

Y/n nods, while adjusting his position to lay on the cold tile .

“Aww poor baby” Nick says smugly

“Oh shush” Y/n says as he sits up against the bathtub

“Seriously though, are you okay?”

“Yea, I mean I’m still a little dizzy but the nausea is gone” Y/n yawns as he curls into Nick.

~Timeskip~

Chris runs up to the door without waiting for Matt.

“Dude seriously! Not even gonna grab the drinks or anything?” Matt hollers from the van.

“I getting the door for you, duh” Chris says meekly

Chris goes back to the van to grab the drinks from Matt, and holds the door for his brother.

“Nick!! We’re back! We got food for Y/n too!” Matt yells as he passes the stairs.

“Matt look at this” Chris whispers

Matt sets down the food on the counter, and heads over to Chris. The boys have their heads peeking into the bathroom only to find Nick and Y/n peacefully sleeping against the bathtub all snuggled up together.

“If they don’t wake up in like…thirty minutes then we’ll wake them up so their food doesn’t get too cold” Matt whispers to Chris

Then a sudden flash comes from Chris’ camera with the image of Nick holding Y/n in his arms sleepy glaring as his brothers.

A/n: okay how was that? Again please be kind it’s my first time writing smth like this but if you have any tips for me i’m definitely open to suggestions!!

#nick sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x reader #nick sturniolo x male reader #sturniolo triplets x reader #nick sturniolo #matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #sturniolo triplets

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waitingonher · 1 year ago

Note

44+7 with percy please ?

EMMY'S 100 EVENT CELEBRATION

percy jackson + give me a kiss first. + i'll pay.

content warning: nothing

authors note: pls im on fire rn. 3 fics released in 3 days?!?! i LOVE not being in a writing slump! oh and why the employees would let little teenagers hold a $130 necklace?? idk 🤒🤒

the expanse of the jewelry shop almost seems dizzying as you roam through the rows and rows of display cases. you and percy eye a variety of accessories, from diamond encrusted rings to dangly ruby earrings. but as your boyfriend follows only a few steps behind you, he thinks that in comparison, you’re the real jewel here. and yes, he does acknowledge how cheesy that realization is, but with the way your eyes are twinkling at the sight of everything and the way you have that gorgeous smile on display, it doesn’t seem very cheesy anymore.

moments later, you find yourself holding an absolutely gorgeous necklace that’s caught your eye. the way it gleamed and glistened underneath the bright white lighting of the store had you hooked the moment you saw it through the display case. looking up, curious green eyes meet your gaze, brows raised in question, “do you like that one?” percy asks, studying your features.

“yeah, it’s super pretty,” you nod your head with enthusiasm, “i think the color of the jewel goes well with my skin tone,” holding the necklace against your neck, you wiggle your brows.

your boyfriend hums. but not as a sign of agreement, more so just acknowledging your comment, because in all honesty, percy’s never really understood the whole “it goes well with my skin tone” thing. the truth is, your boyfriend wholeheartedly believes that you could pull off any color, and he means any color. throw on the ugliest shade of orange known to mankind and he’d still end up complimenting you.

“how much is it?” percy inquires, mentally going through his wallet. unsurprisingly, if he doesn’t have enough cash for the necklace, your boyfriend would find some way to pay for it. even if it means singing or dancing (very poorly) on the side of the street for some stranger’s pity change.

you didn’t even think of the price. oops. grabbing the tiny tag, you turn it around to read the price, and in big bold numbers, it reads $130. so much for adding it to your jewelry collection. you groan and flip the tag towards percy, “love, look at the price! if only it wasn’t so expensive, then i could-”

“i’ll pay,” percy declares, his voice confident and sure, as if dropping $130 for you was no big deal. for you, having your boyfriend spend that much money on you is absolutely ludicrous. but for percy, he’d spend any amount of cash if it means seeing you happy, and if this necklace that matches your skin tone so well makes you happy, then so be it, “no if’s or but’s. let me pay for it, y/n.”

did you hear him correctly? percy wants to pay for your $130 necklace? of course it’s not unusual for him to offer to pay for your things, because he always does. but the thing is, he always ends up paying for it in the end. and you fear that today is going to be the same.

you wave your hand in dismissal, “no, i can’t let you do that. besides, i bet they have some cheaper knockoffs online,” your mind already fills with all of the sites you could check, and you hope this argument makes your boyfriend back down.

percy quirks a brow, “and does a cheaper knockoff guarantee good quality?” he knows you, so he knows your vehement hate for crappy jewelry that’ll end up rusting or oxidizing after a couple of showers.

“okay, well i guess not, but-”

“come on babe, you already know how this is gonna end,” percy gives you a knowing grin, as if he’s replaying all your past dates in his head, “so let’s skip the bickering and get to the part where you let me pay for this necklace.”

boy, is he determined. you sigh, knowing that no matter what you do or say, percy will somehow figure out a way of getting you and the necklace to the register, “fine. but i’m covering lunch today, okay?”

your boyfriend nods his head, “sure,” but his less than eager tone coupled with his overly exaggerated smile makes you not very sure if you’ll be able to actually spend any money today, “now let’s go pay.”

with that, you and percy head in the direction of the register, his hand on the small of your back as you lead the way. yet again, another win for your boyfriend.

“y/n, wait,” percy reaches for your shoulder and turns your body around to face him. he can’t let you walk away with a free necklace, can he? you hum in reply, awaiting his response. good, his brain is finally working and he’s going to say nevermind, you think. a win for you! or so you think, “give me a kiss first,” percy adds, his straight face morphing into a cocky smirk. not a win for you.

but hey, who are you to deny a free necklace and a kiss from your boyfriend? you shake your head and roll your eyes at him, but percy can’t help but look at your smile. now that’s what he wants to see, your beautiful, beautiful smile. your boyfriend leans down as he gently cups the sides of your face and places a kiss on your lips. it’s short and it’s soft, but it’s perfect. and it may be even more perfect than the very necklace in your hand.

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nonexistent-introvert · 1 year ago

Text

Back to December

Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader

Word Count: 3.8k

Content: Angst, breakup, apologies, miscommunication, based off back to December

A/N: In honor of Speak Now Taylor Version!!! Been listening to her on repeat. Pls listen to the song while reading for the full effect.

Javier should be happy, he had just taken down one of Cali’s godfathers, it was a dream for most DEA agents to do that. There was a celebration going on in the department for him and yet, he felt empty and anxious, the same kind of anxiety you get when you lose something close to you. He pushed his way through the crowd, stopping only briefly to force out a polite smile and shake some hands of the people who are congratulating him. Javier never liked the attention anyways, the congratulatory messages felt undeserving and insincere after hearing it for the umpteenth time.

“Start without me.” He replied to the various requests of wanting to toast him. Something was very wrong, he feels it in his gut. It was incredibly infuriating because Javier just can’t seem to pinpoint it

The epiphany hit him like a truck. Javier let out a shaky breath as he stepped on the accelerator in his car. A string of Spanish curses erupted from his lips, each one getting louder as he got more frustrated with himself. He couldn’t lose you.

Javier knew something was wrong the moment he stood outside his apartment. His gut telling him to just turn around and go enjoy his celebration, drowning himself in the alcohol before he could fully comprehend what has happened. Still, his determination to find out the truth was strong, giving him the courage to open the door even if he knew that he wouldn’t find you behind it. Javier strode through his small apartment, his heart sinking with every empty room. His eyes searching for you in desperation. Javier ran his hands through his hair, letting out another curse word in Spanish Your belongings that decorated his living space was long gone, the clothes that hung next to his were nowhere to be seen. Javier dragged himself to the comfort of his kitchen, needing the alcohol to numb the pain in his heart when he finally noticed the note with your handwriting, placed right next to the roses he had bought for you on his way home just a few days ago.

“I’m so sorry.” Three words and you were gone. Javier downed the alcohol in one go, letting the burn of the whiskey burn away the lump in his throat. His only comfort and reminder of you now were the roses in front of him, the only sign that being with you wasn’t all a figment of his imagination.

======================================

I'm so glad you made time to see me

How's life? Tell me, how's your family?

I haven't seen them in a while

You've been good, busier than ever

We small talk, work and the weather

Your guard is up and I know why

You fidgeted with your hands anxiously as you waited for Javier’s arrival. You weren’t sure if he would even show up. So seeing his broad shoulders enter the bar made you sigh in relief. He was wearing a white button-up with a tie, having long abandoned the black outerwear. Javier gave you a nod of acknowledgment while you smiled at him, “You still drink whiskey neat right?” You asked, gesturing to the whiskey you had already bought for him. “Yeah, yeah I do.” He replied, giving you a smile back in return. The tension rose in the air as the both of you enjoyed the drinks.

It had been 2 years. 2 years since you left the 2-year relationship with nothing more than 3 words.

“Thanks for coming.” You began. “How’s life?” You continued with the most basic of conversations. Javier's eyes met yours, hurt clouding his vision. The both of you have drifted to the point of talking about the usual common conversation topics. He tore his eyes away from you. “And Chucho, he doing ok?” You questioned further, trying to stop the silence from settling in between the both of you. Javier shrugged, “He’s good. I-I haven’t been back lately.” He admitted with a grimace and from the look on his face, you knew Javier was cussing himself out for not going back to visit him. Javier always blamed himself. However, you didn’t feel like you were the right person to be offering him comfort. “Work has been a little overwhelming,” Javier confessed, taking another sip of his drink. “I saw.” You nodded, “Um- through the news and all.” You inhaled, you weren’t sure if Javier cared but you figured he had to know. “I’m proud of you, you’re really making a difference.” Javier's eyes shot up to meet yours before he let out a laugh, “Am I?” He asked incredulously. Javier tried to ignore the pain in his heart, he had lost you to pursue this change in the world, was it really worth it? Javier shook his head, turning his head to the crowd in the bar instead. You knew him well enough to know that he didn’t need any other comments, he didn’t want to continue this conversation about his contributions.

It was small talk and curt replies. You clenched your jaw to stifle the ache in your heart. It hurts, it made it hard to breathe. Javier used to look at you with adoration and a soft smile, now he was avoiding your eye contact despite you trying your best to hold onto him. It was the consequences of your actions after all, you had to face it one day or another, or you could let the guilt and the possibility of ‘what could have been’ haunt you for the rest of your life.

You never knew that Javier being on guard around you would hurt you this much. It was only now did you realize how much he had truly opened up to you then. How much he trusted you with his vulnerabilities only for you to take it all for granted.

Because the last time you saw me

Is still burned in the back of your mind

You gave me roses and I left them there to die

The pained look on his face every time he met eye contact with you was enough to break your heart. He furrowed his eyebrows and clenched his jaw before averting his gaze away from you, as though it physically hurts him to look at you. Like a moth to a flame, no matter how much it hurts, Javier couldn’t help the fact that his eyes. would always search for yours. The note next to the roses, he could remember it like it was yesterday. He has replayed that memory so many times till the point it had burned itself into the lining of his mind, trying to find out what had gone so wrong between the both of you. He was sure everything was well, he was sure he gave himself fully to you. The withered roses he had came back to after burying himself in work was another cruel reminder that his relationship with you had came to an end.

==============

These days, I haven't been sleepin'

Stayin' up playin' back myself leavin'

When your birthday passed and I didn't call

Javier Peña never left your thoughts. He rarely did when you were with him and he never did when you left him. There were fragments of him everywhere you went, especially when it reached his birthday month. The memory of you packing up, of you breaking down on his couch the very same night before you finally mustered the courage to leave and not turn back. It was a rash and impulsive decision but if you gave it any other extra thought you would not have committed to leaving. The worst part of it all? The relationship would have destroyed you no matter if you had chosen to leave or stay with Javier and you didn’t want to drag him down into the wreckage. The problem was you, you didn’t want to fight, you didn’t want it to end in an ugly fight, so you left. Or maybe you were just too afraid to open up and face Javier. The word ‘maybe’, was what kept you awake at night. You would stare at the calendar on your desk, the date marked with “Javi’s birthday” was like a stab to your chest. You should call, at least wish him, and hope he isn’t overworking himself and that he had all three meals. You fidgeted with the pen in your hand, trying to put yourself in Javier’s shoes. Ultimately, you would come to the conclusion that it was unfair to leave him, only to reappear in his life on his birthday showing concern for him. You swallowed, forcing yourself to scribble out that reminder on your calendar. You didn’t need it anymore.

On the other side of the earth, Javier's fingers hovered over your contact number in a payphone booth. Curls of his hair have fallen onto his forehead and stuck to it because of the sweat. He missed you so much, he just wanted to hear your voice. Especially when he had just dodged a bullet and barely made it back to Bogota alive. Javier needed you.

But he still forced himself out of the payphone booth. You must have left for a reason.

Then I think about summer, all the beautiful times

I watched you laughin' from the passenger's side

And realized I loved you in the fall

The most beautiful moments in your life were spent with Javier. It was hard forgetting such beauty. The times when he would drive you around his hometown, excitedly telling you all about his childhood and pointing out buildings. When his shoulders were less tensed and a smile graced his features easily in the comfort and safety of his hometown. When his laugh made your stomach fill with butterflies and your ears turn red. It was a simple memory but it carried so much beauty. That Javier was a different person compared to the Javier you see in Columbia. Maybe things would have turned out differently if he was always that Javier who was happy and not the version of him in Columbia who had a constant scowl on his face, a permanent wrinkle in between his eyebrows from frowning too much, and the asshole who pushed everyone away.

You loved it when the orange hues of autumn and the sunlight was paired together, highlighting his features, and making his smile even brighter than it already is. You preferred it more than a dim desk lamp that cast a shadow against his face as he worked tirelessly into the night. Sadly, that was the version of him you were more familiar with, the scene of him being overwhelmed with work was a more common sight than a smile on his face.

And then the cold came, the dark days

When fear crept into my mind

You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye

It felt like waking up from a dream when the both of you eventually returned to Columbia after Autumn. Chucho sent the both of you away reluctantly with various snacks he had bought from a local store. The keychain of a cow still hung from your home keys, a reminder of the ranch that Chucho owned, the ranch that Javier had grown up in.

During the winter, the nights were longer, making Javier’s absence even more apparent than it already is. You pulled another blanket over you, trying to fight the cold of the winter. Javier was always your personal heater, but he isn’t here with you. He rarely is. With nothing else to occupy yourself, you let yourself drown in your own thoughts. The overthinking induced fear, fear for your relationship with him. A fear that you didn’t even notice until it was too late, when it had already plagued your mind till it induced a ‘fight and flight’ response in your mind. Javier made promises, promises that you knew he tried his best to fulfill. Promises that he would spend all his time with you, preferably back in Laredo, and that he would leave this bloodbath known as the drug cartels. However, the cold only made the fear spread. The drug cartels were like the Hydra, slice its head off and another one grows back. The idea of Javier being able to leave this bloodbath seems like a fairytale. You only fear that the only way out would be at the cost of his life.

You knew, you knew that you were a weakness for him. Javier had admitted it to you before which is why he was very overprotective of you. If anyone came after you because of him, Javier would unleash all hell upon them. You too, wouldn’t forgive yourself if he had gotten hurt because of you. In his job, Javier couldn’t afford to have a weakness.

Javier had given all of himself to you. He needed you to know how much you meant to him, that he couldn’t live without you. This amount of love manifested itself as a weakness for him and you felt sorry that you didn’t have the capability to contain the love he had given you. It was the worst trade ever, all of his love only to receive a goodbye in return.

======

So this is me swallowin' my pride

Standin' in front of you sayin' I'm sorry for that night

And I go back to December all the time

It turns out freedom ain't nothin' but missin' you

Wishin' I'd realized what I had when you were mine

I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind

I go back to December all the time

You forced yourself to meet his eyes, those eyes that still made your knees weak. Your heart was pacing till the point that you could hear it thumping in your eardrums. You swallowed the pride that has stopped you from reaching out before, in fear of rejection.

“I really shouldn’t have done that. I'm sorry. I know I should have talked to you.” You paused, trying to find the words to convey your thoughts. You were never good with words. Javier downed his whiskey, staring down at the floor. Your fingernails dug into your skin at his indifferent reaction, you needed to go on despite how much it hurts to witness his reaction.

“I miss you Javi, I really do. If I could turn back time and make myself realize how much you truly mean to me I would. I would have chosen to stay.”

“Then why didn’t you?” Javier coldly questioned. It was at times like this where he was thankful that he was trained to keep a poker face so that you couldn’t see how much his heart is burning for you.

“I was terrified of losing you. Both figuratively and literally.” Javier frowned further at that, his eyes shining with a glint of curiosity and confusion. You rubbed the back of your neck, unsure how to phrase it for him.

“Your job, it carries some risks that I understand but matters just kept getting more and more dangerous. I was afraid that one day you wouldn’t be able to walk through your apartment door again. I was terrified that you lose yourself to the job, letting the haunting scenes and guilt haunt you till the point where you were too far gone.” You explained to him. To put it simply, you were too afraid to carry his burdens with you, too afraid of having to bear the weight with him. You didn’t think you could handle it when the shine in his eyes one day dimmed till the point of no return and he looked at you with eyes with no soul behind them. Javier downed another glass of whiskey, letting it burn down his throat, similar to how his heart burns.

“But the time I spent with you. I will never regret it. I go back to those times every time, missing you and hoping to experience it again.” You admitted, trying to blink away the tears that has formed in your eyes. You prayed that Javier takes your watery eyes as a simple reflection of light.

I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile

So good to me, so right

“I miss you Javier, I really do. I miss seeing the smile on your face everytime your eyes meet with mine, and your tan skin that contrasted your bright eyes, making your eyes shine even brighter.” Your ears burned at the admission, feeling like a teenager confessing to their crush again. Javier had always given his best to you, he had always tried to do right by you. You were just too blinded by fear then to notice the obvious.

“Was this why you were crying that day when I found you?” Javier questioned again, his mind swirling with questions for you. Deep down, a pang of guilt wrapped around his heart, he must have missed out on something or done something wrong. He messed up like he always did. The worst part of it all was that he never noticed.

======

And how you held me in your arms that September night

The first time you ever saw me cry

Javier’s heart shattered when he saw your tear-stricken face. You were curled up in a ball on the bed, your hand trying to wipe at the never-ending tears while your whole body shook uncontrollably.

“Cariño,” He called out, “What's wrong? What happened?” Javier asked, hurriedly walking towards you. You immediately stood up from the bed, your back facing him, trying to hide the tears. “Fine.” You managed to croak out. Javier slowly approached you, not wanting to scare you away. “Please talk to me.” He pleaded. You shook your head, “It’s stupid, just an emotional scene on TV”

You turned around, facing him with a smile. His heart broke into a million pieces. He knew you were lying. You were smiling, the traces of the tears long gone. It terrified him how good you were at hiding your emotions. How many times have you simply just covered up those tears with the smile he loved so much and he just never noticed due to his exhaustion from work? Your eyes scanned him up and down before you fell into his embrace. Relieved to see him back in one piece. Javier was by your side again and that was all it matters. The thoughts that haunted you when you were alone vanished when he was with you.

That was the first time Javier had seen you cry. His mind was in a complete mess as he embraced you against him. Disappointment tugged at his heart, did you not trust him? Why did you have to hide your emotions from him? “Tell me what was the reason for this?” His thumb caressed your cheeks which had been covered in tears just a moment ago. You snuggled into the crook of his neck.

“I’m fine Javi, just an emotional scene on TV.”

Javier dropped the subject after, trusting that you would talk to him when you felt better. And yet you never did. However, his workload made it easy to forget that he has yet to find out the reason behind his tears. He didn’t pursue it then, maybe things would have been different if he had.

======

Maybe this is wishful thinkin'

Probably mindless dreamin'

But if we loved again, I swear I'd love you right

You nodded glumly to his question. “Fuck” Javier breathed out, downing yet another glass of whiskey. The urge to stop him from drinking, from intoxicating himself for the better of his health was there, but you knew you didn’t have the right to anymore. Honestly, you could use the alcohol courage too, you were just afraid that you may black out before you finish what had to be done.

“I-” You started but close your mouth again, picking your next words carefully. You met his eyes again, a small happiness in your heart when you felt your heart pace, even after all the time apart, he still had the same effect on you. Glad to know that your feelings for him weren't from the past memories but for Javier himself.

“This is wishful thinking.” You thought out loud. Javier's eyes widened at your words. “What is?” He asked, swirling the whiskey in his hands. The glimmer of hope ignited in his heart, despite everything you had done, he couldn’t help that his heart still yearns for your love. You swallowed, taking a deep breath to calm your erratic heart.

“If you gave me a chance again, I’ll love you right this time.” The words were finally out.

I'd go back in time and change it, but I can't

So if the chain is on your door, I understand

His silence only made your nerves worse. “I really wish I could go back and change how things ended between us but I know you can’t” You continued, fidgeting uncontrollably under the table.

When you met his eyes and saw the blank look on his face, your heart shattered into a million pieces. “I understand if you won’t. It’s ok.” You told him, forcing the lump in your throat back down. “I wanted to see you today to apologize, not to ask for a second chance anyways.”

“I’m so sorry,” Javier replied. Your heart combusted at his words, a ringing sound in your ears. It was the very same three words that you had told him when you left him. Now that you heard it for yourself, you finally realize that it hurts more than you had thought. You let out a laugh, feeling foolish to even think Javier would give you another chance. “I get it.” You grinned at him.

As much as Javier wanted to reach out to you and give you the chance to love him again. He couldn’t bring himself to know that he can’t give you what you want. That he can’t choose between you and the DEA. He couldn’t handle it if history was to repeat itself. He didn’t want to go through that pain again. He would rather feel lonely than compromise your safety and let you be his weakness again.

“Thank you for everything, Javier.” You smiled warmly at him, glad to finally lift the burden off your chest. Despite how your heart bled at the fact that the both of you were not going to be anything more. You deserved it. At least, you had the memories of your time together to accompany you.

But this is me swallowin' my pride

Standin' in front of you sayin' I'm sorry for that night

And I go back to December

It turns out freedom ain't nothin' but missin' you

Wishin' I'd realized what I had when you were mine

I'd go back to December, turn around and make it alright

I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind

I go back to December all the time

All the time

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whatislovevavy · 1 year ago

Text

8. What Am I Supposed to Do Now?

Jake Seresin x OC (Caledonia Hughes)

WC: 2.8k

Masterlist Previous Part Next Part

Warnings: swearing, mentions of smut (18+), mostly angst

AN: This one’s angsty y’all, not gonna lie. And a bit shorter than the others, but fear not, the next one will be longer :) Thank you @sebsxphia for the encouragement to write this story when it was in development, it means the world <3 Also a big thank you to @royallyprincesslilly for the design of the divider.

Please consider leaving a comment, a tip, or reblogging, leaving likes doesn't do anything on this hellsite. It helps with motivation when writing and the tips help since I’m between jobs at the moment :)

All of my writings will be added to my writing side blog @sophs-writing-nook

These characters, except for Caledonia and Ella, are obviously not my own. This is an 18+ fanfic, so minors scoot pls. You are responsible for the media you consume. Do not copy, plagiarize, repost, or translate this fic without my explicit permission as it is my own creation.

Jake pensively hit the backspace button on his phone's touch pad.

He knew at the back of his mind that he should be telling you this in person.

The swing of the break room door broke him from his stare at his screen.

"Anyways, we're going on a date next Saturday to the aquarium in the city," Bradley said with a small lopsided smirk as he walked in with Natasha and Javy.

"What's this I hear about Rooster finally getting a woman to go out with him?"

Rooster flipped Jake off as he got his lunch from the fridge, making Natasha let out a small laugh, and Javy quirk his lip.

"So what's her name, how'd you meet her?"

Bradley closed the fridge with a click, striding towards the table Jake was settled at.

"Her name's Ella, she's a grad student at UC San Diego. Met her at that coffee place you recommended last week, got her number, and have been texting since."

He flashed Jake a grin.

Jake furrowed his brows, a soft hum leaving his lips.

It couldn't have been your Ella, could it? UC San Diego was a big school, there was definitely more than one Ella there.

Soon Javy and Phoenix joined them at the table.

"What?"

Rooster broke him from his deep in thought glance as he softly stirred the left over beef stew.

But at this point, he couldn’t stomach the previously delicious stew you made for him. It only served as a reminder of what he was about to do, and for what he didn’t have the courage to do.

"Nothing, Caledonia has a friend in her grad program named Ella."

Bradley’s lip quirked.

“Cali is biochem, right?”

Jake nodded.

A soft hum left Bradley’s lips, “Yeah, that might be the same one. So, noticed you’ve been spending a lot of time with her lately, what's the deal?”

Jake felt his heart freeze.

He shrugged, nonchalantly, trying to exude that same Hangman confidence and bravado.

“Nothing too serious, just helped out with a few things Penny asked me to do for her.”

Natasha almost bent her fork in her hand as his words registered.

Did he not know how much he meant to her?

Jake could feel her piercing stare, but chose to keep his attention on Bradshaw.

Javy’s gaze was more marked with the subtle signs of pity as he worked his way through his wrap.

Jake couldn’t decide which one felt worse.

Rooster took a bite of his lunch, “ya know, I’ve been meaning to ask, why do you call her by her full name?”

Was it getting hot in here? He wouldn’t be surprised if the answer was yes, considering the time of year.

If Javy hadn’t known him all these years, he would have missed the flash of panic behind the thick curtain of confidence that was slowly becoming a thin veil.

He shrugged, “I was always taught to treat women that give me booze with the utmost respect, hence the full name.”

Bradshaw nodded, letting his eyebrows raise, “But what about Penny? You call her Pen all the time.”

Natasha smirked slightly around her forkful of lunch.

Jake swallowed, “Well, that’s different… I’ve known Penny for a lot longer than Caledonia.”

Rooster leaned back, furrowing his brow, and biting the inside of his cheek.

“Ok, but why did you leave the Hard Deck with her last week?”

Jake took a deep breath, “She needed help with her car before she headed home. I was at the bartop paying my tab and Penny asked me to help her. What is this anyway? An interrogation? You gonna ask me about every woman I’ve talked to?”

Bradshaw smirked, “Just curious, Bagman, no need to get defensive,” he put his hands up in surrender, thoroughly enjoying seeing his former rival riled up.

Javy bit back a smile.

"Yeah, Bagman, don't need to get your panties in a bunch."

Natasha smirked as Jake shot her daggers.

"If I were wearing panties, they would be the most unbunched pair you'd ever seen."

Jake grumbled, sending a glare to his teammates as they laughed and snorted.

“Plus, it’s not that way with her. We’re just friends.”

Jake took a spoonful of stew, purposefully avoiding his colleagues unimpressed glances.

“Right.”

Jake glared as Phoenix took a bite of her sandwich.

“Alright, I think that’s enough teasing. Can’t waste all our material in one day.”

Javy shot him a wink as Jake flipped him off, his remaining colleagues breaking into soft chuckles.

The topic was diverted to the back burner for the time being, to the point where Jake forgot about the text he planned to send.

Conversation flowed from when the new recruits were coming in, to summer plans, and to different get togethers on weekends planned within their friend group.

A small sense of panic ran through him as Phoenix suggested that Caledonia be invited to all of their summer plans. Including their Barbenheimer-themed pool and BBQ party in July.

He guaranteed Caledonia wouldn’t want to come if he was there after the message he was typing out was sent.

Soon it was time to wrap up and head back out to the briefing room and get ready to fly in the latter portion of the day.

Jake took one last pensive glance at his phone.

This is better. For the both of us.

Jaw tensing, he pressed send.

He cleaned up the rest of his lunch and left the breakroom in a silence coated by the soft buzzing of the overhead lights and the impending crack of broken hearts.

—

A sigh left your lips.

How could you have been so stupid?

You should have read the label more clearly before measuring it out.

Your mind swam with detrimental thoughts of the days failed experiment.

The cells you spent the previous day growing were wasted when you accidentally put too strong of a solvent after the cells were centrifuged.

It also didn’t help that Ella was away presenting at a conference at the other side of the country.

Frankly, you just wanted to go home, take a nice shower, nestle into your sheets, and forget about the frustrating day you got out of.

A sigh left your lips as you settled into the drivers seat of your car, feeling your frustration dissipate from your body, and be quickly filled with exhaustion.

You bit the inside of your lip as you waited for your phone to turn on and see any messages you missed.

The thought of texting Jake to see if he wanted to come over crossed your mind.

A small smile formed at the thought.

Message from well-fed raccoon :) not downloaded.

You opened the app, tapping on his contact icon.

Your brows furrowed, heart plummeting to the deepest parts of your chest.

We shouldn't do this arrangement anymore. I'm sorry.

You couldn't help but read over the two sentences. Over and over again. Hoping, praying, that they would be something different.

A rattled sigh left your lips, letting your eyes clench shut, and head hit your seat.

Tears pricked your eyes. A dribble quickly turning into a torrential downpour.

Soon, your car was wracked with the repeated, frenzied collisions of your head against the upholstery of your driver's seat.

You stopped with one final hit of your head against the faux leather portion of the head rest, feeling your scowl morph into a groan ridden scowl.

Why the fuck did this have to happen?

What was wrong with you?

Not only did you have to worry about attracting someone, but now you had to worry about keeping them.

Was it your weight?

Your busy schedule?

Did he find out about your depression? Anxiety?

You did your damndest to ensure that Jake knew nothing of that part of you.

Your lip quivered as you broke into a sob marked by wails and sniffles, no different from that of a wounded animal.

God, you couldn’t help but feel that this was coming.

This arrangement; it was all too good to be true.

You scoffed through your tears.

You shouldn’t have been so stupid.

He was called Hangman for a reason.

Your virginity. Your very first experiences with sex.

Your eyes shut as you realized the gravitas of this risk, only sobbing harder.

What if he had only wanted you because you’d never been with anyone else?

This was absolutely devastating.

The world was crashing down around you. You couldn’t breathe with how hard you had started crying, unable to help the feeling of violation that invaded your veins like a poison, turning your blood to a thick sludge, making your heart beat like an engine in overdrive to compensate.

In your blurry eyed, emotionally compromised state, you only wanted to hear one voice.

Penny’s.

She’d understand.

You didn’t want to explain to your mom that you developed a ‘situationship’ with a deadly man and that it bit you in the ass. Hard.

The familiar rumble of the engine filled your car. You swiped away at the continuously flowing tears and mustered enough energy and a sliver of mental clarity to get home safe.

—

“Hey, Cali, how was-”

Penny’s word died on her lips.

The sunny San Diego weather backdropped your teary, red eyes and cheeks, curled lips, and tears streaming down your pretty face.

“Oh, sweetheart,” she strode towards you, encasing you in a hug as you reached out to her, “what’s wrong?”

You sniffled, burying your face into her sweater-clad shoulder.

“Sweetheart, I can’t hear you.”

You lifted your head from her chest.

“Jake doesn’t want me anymore.”

Penny’s heart broke at the sight, gently pulling you back to her, wrapping you in her embrace as sobs wracked your body.

Her heart continued to crack for you with each sob and gasp you let out, gently running her hand through your hair.

You tried not to think about how Jake would do the same thing when he kissed you.

He used to bring you so much joy, but now you felt hypersensitive to even the thought of Hangman.

Touching you.

Speaking to you.

Looking at you.

How he cuddled with you when you slept over that one night.

How he made breakfast with you the next morning.

How he knew your favorite flavor of gelato from Francisco’s.

How he bought you $300 worth of sex toys.

Was this all some kind of sick game to him?

It made your breathing difficult and skin crawl.

How could you have let someone in so close, and know every inch of your body?

“Shhh, Caledonia, it’s ok… let it out.”

Penny knew that Hangman had a reputation. Anyone who frequented the Hard Deck knew that.

But she saw the way he looked at Caledonia when she was busy preparing drinks. Or when she was fixing the juke box. Or wiping down tables.

Penny’s hope for the relationship to succeed was overshadowed by the bubbling sense of anger in her belly.

How could Hangman do such a thing to you?

What was your situation with him exactly?

She continued to soothe you.

“Cali, I’m so sorry… would you want me to call Ella to come over?”

You shook your head, “Ella’s at a conference, and I don’t want to make her worried,” the lump in your throat evident with each break from sniffling.

Penny’s eyebrows furrowed.

You didn’t tell your bestfriend, because you didn’t want to worry her?

Hangman was such an asshole for letting you go.

To both himself, and you.

“Ok, I’m going to call Halo and Phoenix and see if they can come over. Ok? Would that help?”

You nodded, lip quivering as another round of sobs made your body crumple against hers.

“What am I," sniffle, "supposed to do now?”

Your sob-ridened words made Penny’s heart ache as she watched the bright, beautiful, smart girl she knew be deduced to a sobbing mess.

If she could help it, Hangman wouldn’t be allowed to step foot into her bar without being overboarded.

So she did the next best thing; holding you in her open doorway as you sobbed into her knitted top.

“It’s ok, sweetheart…shhh… it's going to be ok.”

That only made you cry harder.

—

Jake’s front door opened with a click, taking his shoes off with a soft thud, not bothering to arrange them on the floor with the rest.

He went through the motions of preparing dinner; the last remaining portion of the beef stew you made him.

His jaw tensed at the sight of the transparent hazel and oak bark brown stew staining the sides of the plastic container on the counter.

How was it so easy for something to go from warming the deepest darkest parts of his soul to being the equivalent of lead, coating his insides and making it hard to breathe?

Shouldn’t I be relieved?

Just as he suspected, the stew didn’t bring him the sense of comfort it did only a mere few days ago.

He sighed, languidly twisting and turning his spoon in the stew, moving the typically delectable sauteed mushrooms and tender beef around.

Now they just made his stomach churn.

Maybe it wasn’t ever the stew itself that was warm and comforting.

Maybe it was the fact that you were the one who made it.

You.

He continued to absentmindlessly stir, the familiar jingle of keys near the front door meeting his ears.

“You’re home late.”

Jake’s seemingly dulled down tone made Javy furrow his eyebrows as he continued to undo his shoes.

“Picked up something for Delilah.”

Jake only gave a small hum.

“Everything alright?”

Jake took a deep exhale, avoiding his wingman’s gaze.

“Yeah,” he coughed,” yeah, I’m fine just tired.”

Javy stared as he trudged towards the stairs, his bowl of half finished left on the table.

His all too familiar air of confidence was elsewhere.

As Javy heard Jake’s door shut, his phone buzzed.

Phoenix: We need to talk. Can you meet at the Hard Deck tomorrow?

—

Jake couldn’t take his eyes off the ceiling as he laid on his bed.

He should feel relieved.

Relationships were never his strong suit, meaning he avoided them like the plague.

He’d done it once, and never again.

It was too…painful. Heart wrenching. Traumatizing.

One-night stands were easier. Always easier.

This arrangement was supposed to be just that.

He’d help you out, teach you the ropes and then wish you luck on your future relationships.

That was it.

He was supposed to move on with his day without seeing things in his everyday life and not think about you.

Not think, “Caledonia would love this”, or “ This would make her smile.”

You weren’t supposed to have an infectious smile, or a laugh that made him wish for glimpses of a future together, or be able to moan and whine so prettily that he would drown in if he could.

Your lips weren’t supposed to be soft. Or sweet. Or pretty.

Hell, you weren’t supposed to look as beautiful as you did in that velvet dress at Admiral Cain’s retirement ball. Or as you walked towards him in his booth at Fransisco’s. Or as you opened the door when he was supposed to teach you how to give a blowjob. Or as you stood before him in front of the mirror in the dressing room of Pleasures of the 3rd Kind.

Or when he first saw your body without the hindrance of clothes.

But the state of dress, or undress, didn’t change how he saw you.

It was all you.

You.

He could feel his heart beat faster and cheeks heat as reminisced on his moments with you.

But those moments seemed to dwarf in comparison to his moments with you outside of your lessons together.

Getting gelato together.

Playing cards with Amelia.

Making up a story to get a 15% discount on sex toys.

Slow dancing with you.

Feeling your lips on his cheek.

Your soft, tender kisses.

Your warm, safe, secure hugs.

Your infectious, warm laugh that made his chest explode with warmth.

How you cared for him so effortlessly.

The fact you took time out of your busy schedule to care of him when he was sick.

He hadn’t been taken care of like that since he left home.

Those moments made him feel some sliver of deservance of your affections. Of your devoted, unconditional love.

He wasn’t supposed to feel this way.

He was supposed to be able to move on with his life, like with every one-night stand he’d been with before.

Say goodbye to you after he ‘hit and split,” and never think about you again.

Or to never feel the need to think about you again.

It should have been a relief, cutting off this arrangement with you.

But it wasn’t.

And he’d have to live with that.

The fact he was stupid enough, scared enough, and selfish enough to let you go.

To not tell you what he needed to tell you.

Jake could feel his ill placed relief morph into a deep rooted sadness in his empty chest.

Like a spoon scrapping the inside of a pomegranate until there was nothing but rind.

A rattled sigh left his lips, feeling a lump in his throat begin to settle.

What am I supposed to do now?

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