#so we are thinking about my little angel child. perfect baby boy

[penkura]

Our Angel

Summary: Sanji can't believe how lucky he is to have you and this little baby you brought into the world.

Warning: Mentions of giving birth, pregnancy discussion, loving husband Sanji :3

Note: Ahh the final one-shot I have done from the 'knowing' universe! :') I wrote this after the last one, and it's long but also one of my favorites. I love writing Sanji, please let me write more for him.

How much longer? How much longer??

Sanji's anxiety was through the roof as he paced back and forth in front of the infirmary door. You were finally in labor and Chopper and Robin had kicked him out of the room, thinking he was making you more stressed than your contractions were. He could hear them guiding you through the next contraction and telling you to start pushing, and he really, really wanted a cigarette for the first time in months.

He desperately wanted to be in there with you, but didn't want you more stressed than you already were. Sanji believed it couldn't be too much longer, but also wasn't entirely sure. Labor could last hours or even multiple days, yours was progressing quickly though, and it wouldn't be long before you met your baby face to face. Sanji leaned against the door, holding his breath without realizing it, just waiting and listening.

And a few moments later, he finally released his breath when he heard a baby's cries, standing up straight and facing the door, his anxiety finally being taken off his shoulders. He could hear Robin and Chopper congratulating you and telling you that you did amazingly, but he couldn't hear if they said whether you had a boy or girl, or how the baby was doing. The cries though told him that your newborn was doing just well, they were very upset to be in the world now, but it would be all right over time.

After several more minutes of waiting and his anxiety picking up again, Sanji was beyond glad to see the infirmary door open and Robin giving him a smile.

"You can come back in now."

He didn't need to be told twice, quickly entering the room and hurrying to your side, making you laugh when he got to you, dropping to his knees beside your bed and taking your hand before hugging you as close as possible.

"Sanji~"

"I'm so glad you're okay! Both of you!"

Sanji started kissing you all over your face, making you laugh lightly until you both heard a small cry, which made him freeze a bit before looking at your little baby resting comfortably on your chest. Seeing the tears start to well up in his eyes made you smile softly before you looked back at your newborn child.

"What do you think?"

"They're…perfect."

"Isn't she?"

"She?!"

Laughing again you nodded. Through the later months of your pregnancy, Sanji made it clear how badly he wanted and hoped you were having a girl. When your baby first kicked, there was so much excitement between the two of you that he inadvertently called them she, surprising you until you questioned him about it.

"She?"

"...I said they."

"No, Sanji, you said she." You giggled a bit seeing how embarrassed he was at letting his wish for a daughter out like that. "You think we're having a girl?"

"I…hope we are."

You definitely had realized, even before then, that Sanji would be a great girl dad, and now he could prove that to you with your newborn daughter. Just the fact he seemed hesitant to even touch her tiny hand for a second told you he was going to be the most protective dad you'd ever met.

"She looks exactly like you, Sanji."

"She…she really does." Sanji finally reached out and barely brushed your daughter's cheek with his knuckle, which made her move just a bit. She looked like she was his clone almost. The same blonde hair, same curled eyebrows. She basically got nothing from you and everything from your husband, but you didn't really mind it. You might get lucky and she'd get your eye color, but even then it would be all right if not.

She was still your perfect little daughter.

"Can I," Sanji pulled you from your thoughts, nervously biting his lip a bit while looking from your daughter to you, "can I hold her…?"

"Of course!"

Nerves started bubbling up, but Sanji let you show him the best way to hold your daughter. He held her close, keeping one of his hands under her head to give her more support, while she started to whine when she was moved from you to him. You weren't at all surprised when Sanji started to gently hush her, kissing her forehead and softly telling her that she was all right.

"Yeah, it's ok, sweetheart. Daddy's got you, angel."

Your daughter calmed down almost immediately, opening her eyes to try and focus on Sanji, and it nearly took his breath away to see her looking up at him. This was what you two had waited the last nine months for. To finally see and meet your daughter face to face, and here she was! A precious, beautiful little angel that fit perfectly in his arms and looked at him like he was the most amazing thing she'd ever seen (which, granted, she'd really only seen you and Sanji, but it still meant everything to him). You just watched as Sanji stared at her and she stared back at him, before she yawned and snuggled herself more comfortably in his arms, you noticing how his bottom lip was trembling while he watched her fall asleep, kissing her forehead again and whispering how much he loved your sweet little girl.

"[Y/N]...thank you so much for her."

Hearing how strained Sanji's voice was made you smile softly, knowing he was fighting to not start crying. Not right now, he didn't want to wake your daughter or cause her any distress.

"What do you think we should name her?"

"I…I'm not sure, love."

"Well, I have an idea."

+!+

When you had gone into labor, the rest of your crewmates were off the ship. You'd docked at an island the day before and they'd all gone to explore a bit, pick up a few things, and let the log pose reset. You had hoped to go later in the day but obviously things had changed and you wouldn't be joining anyone on this island this time. Robin and Chopper had stayed behind just in case, since you were near your due date anyway and it was a good thing they did.

Once Luffy and the others got back, they were surprised Robin was the only one on the deck of the Sunny waiting for them. Luffy of course was the one to ask, running up to Robin and asking if you were sleeping or something. You'd normally be on the deck waiting for everyone, so it was weird they didn't see you this time.

Robin smiled a bit, "Well I assume she is by now. She gave birth to a beautiful baby girl while you all were gone."

Everyone was completely silent, expecting Robin to say she was just kidding to get a rise out of them.

"I'm not joking by the way."

With that statement there were shouts from Usopp, Luffy, and Nami, the latter of the three running for the infirmary right away saying she needed to see her niece. Not even having seen your daughter yet but being happy for you, Franky and Brook were in tears, while Zoro smiled a bit and Jimbei gave a smile and a nod.

"Sounds like the crew has expanded by one then."

Luffy and Usopp were quick to follow after Nami, nearly breaking down the infirmary door asking to see your daughter.

You were actually wide awake, holding your daughter and showing her off to Nami who was cooing softly towards her.

"What a little cutie, yes you are! Aunt Nami is going to buy you lots of cute dresses!"

You laughed a bit while your daughter stared up at Nami, seeming to be completely amazed by her. "You wanna hold her?"

Nami was about to respond when Luffy pushed past her, getting up close to see your daughter. "She's so small!"

"Luffy!" Sanji grabbed your captain by the back of his shirt and started pulling him away. "Get out of her face! You're going to scare her and make her cry!"

"No I'm not!"

"Hey guys."

"Yes you are!" Honestly Sanji trusted Luffy a lot, but he needed to learn boundaries, especially with a newborn baby.

"Nuh-uh! She's gonna think I'm funny!"

"Boys."

"And if she doesn't?!"

"Then…then…I don't know?"

"Idiots!" Nami was close to bashing both their heads in, but her outburst got their attention. "You're both about to make her cry!"

Sanji looked over and saw you gently hushing your daughter who was starting to whine and whimper like she was about to cry, him rushing over by your side to help with quiet, sweet words that he was sorry and didn't mean to be loud.

"My apologies, Angel. I didn't mean to startle you."

Once she calmed back down, you let Usopp and Luffy come over and see her, both of them looking amazed by how small she was. Luffy kept begging to hold her, Nami telling him she had first dibs, and Usopp asking how you both were. Your other crewmates joined you all after a bit, Brook offering to start playing a lullaby to keep your baby girl calm while Franky was crying about how super it was to meet her finally. Robin returned to make sure you weren't getting overwhelmed, and Chopper wanted to do another check on your daughter to be certain she was doing all right. Jimbei gave you his congratulations and said you'd had a beautiful baby, while Zoro mostly stayed to the side, but he did smile just a bit, glad for you to have safely delivered your baby.

You were doing well with everyone there, answering questions and letting each of your crewmates see your daughter up close, they all took turns briefly holding her since they knew that, obviously, they'd have plenty of chances to do so in the future. Once Nami got a hold of her a second time, she refused to let her go to anyone that wasn't you or Sanji. She was going to absolutely spoil your daughter and everyone could see that.

"Hey hey," Luffy latched onto your arm, giving you a big grin, "what'd you guys name her??"

The small bits of chatter quieted hearing Luffy's question, most of your friends looking at you or Sanji for an answer. Nami still had your daughter in her arms, very gently bouncing the sleeping newborn.

You smiled at Sanji with a slight nod, him returning the gesture to speak up.

"We've decided to call her Angel. After calling her that while [Y/N] was pregnant, it…it felt right."

Truthfully you had offered to name her after Sanji's mother, whether you'd had a boy or girl, and he almost took you up on it, but felt that for now, he'd wanted to give your child their own, unique name. He really did greatly appreciate you wanting to honor his mother, but didn't feel ready for that yet. And like he'd said, you two had called your daughter an angel the whole time you were pregnant, actually naming her Angel felt like the right thing to do and you both thought it sounded wonderful when you decided.

"What a sweet name." Robin smiled and nodded, the rest of your crewmates agreeing with her.

After some time Chopper said you needed rest and it was close to dinner time, making Sanji nod.

"I'll go get something started for–"

"Nope!" Shaking her head, Nami handed Angel back to Sanji to stop him. "We'll take care of dinner and bring you guys some; you stay with your wife and daughter, Sanji!"

With a grin she left the infirmary and headed straight for the kitchen, everyone else following shortly after her, once they'd given you another congratulations and said goodnight to their niece. Seeing the shocked look on Sanji’s face made you laugh once everyone else had left.

“...did I just get banned from my own kitchen?”

+!+

The rest of the evening went by smoothly and quietly for your little family. Nami had sent Zoro to bring you and Sanji dinner once it was done, and you were grateful for having so many people to take care of your family while you recovered. Chopper came in a few times to check up on you and Angel, making sure both of you were doing well before he headed off to bed, telling Sanji to come get him if anything happened. After you had dinner and nursed Angel again, you went and took a quick shower, leaving Sanji with your daughter which made him terribly nervous even though he knew it was only going to take you a few minutes to shower. All he did the whole time you were gone was watch her sleep. You'd given her a pacifier to hopefully keep her calm and sleeping, and it did work. Sanji was just so enthralled with her, gently hushing her and stroking her chubby cheek whenever she started to fuss a little.

"Hey it's alright, don't cry. Mommy will be back soon, daddy's got you for now."

When you did get back, you held back a laugh seeing Sanji was nearly asleep while holding Angel. Quietly, you went over and took her from him, waking your sleepy husband and telling him it was just you, you were going to get Angel to bed so you both could sleep. While Sanji followed your lead and went to take a shower himself, you got Angel ready for bed and comfortable in a bassinet near you, she was sleeping soundly and you knew she'd wake at some point in the night, but until then, you'd watch her sleep and hold her little hand, making sure she knew you weren't going anywhere.

"I love you so much, Angel," leaning over, you placed a soft kiss on her forehead, "I'm so glad you're ours."

Once he came back from his own shower, Sanji wasn't even the slightest bit surprised to find you already asleep, still holding your daughter's hand. You'd had quite a day, having pushed a whole new person out into the world, nursing her multiple times, and having to deal with your anxious crewmates for several hours after they got back. It was a wonder you'd stayed awake as long as you had! Sanji knew he was staying with you in the infirmary as long as Chopper made you and Angel stay there, so he did the same as you and kissed your daughter's forehead, before slipping into your bed beside you, bringing you close to him and kissing your cheek once he did.

"I'm so proud of you, [Y/N]. You've been amazing today."

You shifted a bit, making Sanji smile when you told him you loved him before falling back fast asleep.

"I love you too…both of you."

+!+

Your sweet little Angel had grown so much in the last three years. She had ended up with your eye color, which made you beyond happy that she'd gotten something from you. She'd learned to walk, talk, and had the brightest smile and giggles on the Sunny, apart from Luffy that is. She really was an angel to everyone, but especially you and Sanji.

Her first steps weren't really because of you or Sanji, it was Luffy and Usopp trying to get her to start taking a few on her own. She'd been able to walk a slight bit at the time with someone holding her hands, but not on her own yet. You absolutely trusted Usopp and Luffy with her (despite how many times Luffy tossed her into the air and caught her, the fear you felt the first time made you consider leaving), they were helping Angel learn to walk under your watch, you were sitting nearby on a lounger with Sanji, who was slightly nervous watching them. Honestly Sanji was the more nervous parent at times, but you knew he just wanted Angel to be as safe as possible while you all traveled the seas.

"Come onnnnn, you can do it, Angel!" Luffy grinned at her with his arms wide open, while Usopp had a hold of her hands, keeping her standing up. Angel frowned a bit, tears welling up in her eyes when she tried to reach for Luffy but couldn't grab him. He was only a few feet away, he'd easily be able to hurry over and lift her up, but your captain also really wanted to see her take her steps on her own.

"You wanna try, Angel?" Usopp smiled and let go of one of her hands to ruffle her hair a bit, which made her whine slightly. Luffy took two very small steps forward, arms still wide open and grinning.

"You can do it!"

Angel kept reaching her free hand towards Luffy, before she looked at her feet and took a step, looking back at him while she started to walk on her own once Usopp let go of her hand.

Watching your then nine-month-old daughter take her first solo steps caused you to tear up while Sanji was beaming with pride. Angel made it over to Luffy on her own, and once she did, he scooped her up in his arms with loud laughter.

"Yahoo, you did it, Angel!!"

"Good job! Next you'll be running around the ship!"

Angel giggled loudly while Luffy tossed her gently into the air. After the one time he threw her too high up causing you and Sanji to threaten him he'd been more careful, especially seeing how much she enjoyed being tossed up and caught. After that, she started following you and Sanji like a duckling, eventually getting to where she was running around the Sunny, either chasing someone or being chased with loud laughter.

When she said her first word, you weren't even on the ship. You had gone into town with Franky and Jimbei when you landed on an island, checking the place out to see what stores they had and how long it would take the log pose to reset. You'd left Angel on the ship with Sanji, and while he was grateful for the time with your daughter, he was also trying to figure out what groceries he needed to go shopping for the next day. Nami offered to entertain Angel while he checked the pantry and fridge, taking her out to the deck for some sun and to play with her.

"You are just so cuuuuuute! You got your daddy's hair and eyebrows but your mommy's face!"

Angel smiled and giggled a bit at Nami, covering her mouth with her little hands. At this point she was already 18-months-old, but hadn't said her first word just yet. You weren't very concerned, knowing it would happen when it happened, but every evening when the three of you went to your room, Sanji would sit with Angel on your bed and try to get her to say something more than her toddler babbling.

"Come on, sweetheart. Can you say dada?"

Angel babbled, no discernable words coming from her mouth while she smiled and reached at Sanji.

"Then…mama?"

"Mmmm….mmmm…." She pressed her lips together before sticking her tongue out.

You laughed, shaking your head. "I don't think she's ready yet, Sanji."

Nami had given Angel a coloring book and some crayons to entertain herself, especially once she started talking with Zoro about the money he owed her.

"I'm just saying, if you leave me with a little of your allowance every time we dock, you'll be paid off in no time!"

"How much is a little?"

"Mmm," Nami thought for a second, patting Angel on the head when she smiled at her, "about 300 berries."

"That's a tenth of what you give me!"

"Yeah, and?"

Zoro's eye twitched slightly, obviously annoyed by this. It wasn't his fault all the stuff he normally bought was expensive, or that he spent a decent bit of it on booze!

The two argued a bit more while Angel watched them, giggling a bit when Zoro lifted her up.

"Wait, where are you taking her?!"

"Nap time. Right, tiny cook?"

"Nap!"

Nami and Zoro both stared at Angel in surprise, your daughter yawning a little and sticking her thumb in her mouth.

"Did she just…?"

"She did! Sanji!!"

Hearing Nami yell for him, Sanji dropped what he was doing and ran out to the deck instantly. "What's wrong?!"

"Listen, listen!!" Nami turned back to Angel and Zoro, telling him to say what he did before.

"Hey, it's nap time, right?"

Angel nodded. "Nap!"

Hearing her say an actual word, not toddler babbling, made Sanji's jaw drop and he started to tear up a bit. "Y-Yeah! It's nap time, Angel!"

Honestly it was an odd first word, but when you heard her say it, it made you smile and hug her close, kissing her chubby cheeks and telling her how proud you were. After that, the words came more easily and she quickly realized she knew who mama and dada were, and started calling you and Sanji whenever she needed you. She eventually had nicknames for everyone so she could call them easily, and your crewmates accepted them instantly.

As she got older, turning three more recently, you'd become even more amazed with your daughter and how she was becoming her own person. She was a giggly mess most days, loved fruit over every other food, and took naps almost as often as Zoro. They had become napping buddies much to Sanji's chagrin, but he eventually accepted since Zoro would bring Angel to one of you once she was awake.

Nami made good on her promise to buy Angel lots of cute dresses, your daughter's wardrobe was better than yours. Robin would sit and read with her until she fell asleep most nap times, if Zoro wasn't around at the moment. Usopp and Luffy would play games like tag or hide and seek with her, one of them always having Angel on their shoulders in a team up against the other. Chopper would join them most of the time, or he and Angel would play on the swing or in the kiddy pool together. Franky made Angel new toys constantly, only with your approval did he give them to her. Brook would play whatever song or lullaby Angel wanted to hear, or do his infamous 45 Degrees to make her burst out laughing. Jimbei would tell her (along with Luffy, Usopp, and Chopper) various stories he had from before he joined you all, and she loved every one of them.

Despite your love for your crewmates, you had more enjoyed introducing Angel to the Baratie crew over everyone else. After your pregnancy was confirmed, Sanji had given them a call, speaking to Zeff before anyone else and letting him know he was going to, basically, be a grandfather. It became so quiet that you and Sanji both wondered if the connection got severed, before hearing Patty yell asking why Zeff was crying over the transponder snail receiver. It made Sanji tear up worse than when you told him you were definitely pregnant, and he had to give you the receiver to tell the rest of the Baratie crew. When they all heard, they cheered and gave congratulations to you and Sanji, a few of them saying you absolutely had to stop by once the baby had been born. Once Angel was born, you sent over all the pictures you took of her so everyone at Baratie could see her as she grew up. Eventually your ship made it back to the East Blue and the Baratie, around the time of Angel's second birthday, which Zeff demanded you to celebrate there once you arrived. You dressed her in a cute little, frilly pink dress that Nami had gotten her, and knew Sanji was anxious for everyone to meet the both of you properly. Of course, you'd been with the Straw Hats already when you'd been by and recruited Sanji, but things had moved so fast back then that formal introductions were an afterthought. Now that Sanji was back with you as his wife and with his little daughter, it was definitely nerve-wracking for him.

Well, it was until the three of you stepped inside and all the chefs quickly rushed to see Angel, all of them fawning over and doting on her. Almost all his nerves went away as Patty, Carne, and the others tearfully loved on your daughter and introduced themselves to both of you properly. Angel became shy with so many new faces, reaching for Sanji to take her from you which he did, and she hid her face in his shoulder.

"Aww come on little one, what's wrong?"

"She's just overwhelmed. It's too many people at once."

Hearing that, most of the Baratie chefs dissipated in order to let Angel relax again, the only one coming up to the three of you was Zeff himself, bringing back Sanji's nerves.

"Well, the baby eggplant has his own baby eggplant now."

"Watch your mouth with my daughter, crap geezer." The smiles on both their faces told you all was well, this was the norm between Sanji and Chef Zeff. Sanji got Angel's attention to get her to lift her face from his shoulder, pointing her view to Zeff. "This is your grandad, Angel."

Angel blinked a little, not the slightest bit scared and reached for Zeff, knowing it was safe because Sanji said so. Once Zeff had a hold of her, Angel just smiled and giggled, giving him a loose hug. It made him turn away from both of you, confusing you the most, until you heard Carne shout that Zeff was crying again and got to be the first to hold Angel. You laughed when you noticed Sanji had turned away as well, fighting his own tears. The rest of your visit was less tearful, filled more with laughter while everyone entertained Angel and you told all the stories you had of her up until then. You did also learn that Zeff kept every picture you sent of her in his room, a fact that made Sanji happier than you could have imagined.

After your visit back to Baratie, you kept in touch by sending more pictures, even a few letters telling stories of what Angel was learning and how well she was growing.

The last three years had changed so much, you and Sanji couldn't imagine life without your little angel.

"[Y/N], mon amour! Angel, my dearest!!"

"Daddy!!" Angel's bright [e/c] eyes lit up, squealing when Sanji came over to the both of you, providing you with a drink and snack, and Angel with her favorite snack of apple juice and carrots.

"I've got your drinks and snacks for the day!" He gave you both the most loving smile, making you return it and Angel giggled.

"Say thank you daddy!"

"Thank youuu!"

Clutching his heart, Sanji still couldn't believe his luck, even after all this time. Seven years married to you, three years of life as a father. The amount of love he had for you two made it feel like his heart was going to burst out of his chest most days.

"Oh, my beautiful girls!! What gods did I please to deserve you?! I love you both so much!!"

You laughed a bit, taking a sip of your fruity water and rubbing your slightly swollen stomach. "What're you gonna do if this one's a boy?"

"Oh, that's easy," Sanji gave you a loving smile while he picked Angel up as she requested, "I'll love him as much as I love you both."

"Have you thought about what I said? For a name?"

Nodding, Sanji sat beside you on the lounger with Angel still in his arms, her grabbing her sippy cup and a baby carrot.

"I have, and I think…I'll take you up on it this time."

Smiling, you gave a slight nod, before kissing his cheek with a hand still on your stomach.

"Sora it is then."

A few months later, you ended up having a little boy with your hair and Sanji's eyes, and Angel was absolutely in love with her baby brother once Sanji introduced him to her. Your crewmates once again were beyond happy for you, and you just couldn't imagine your life turning out any other way.

[animezinglife]

Nyx Headcanons

Headcanons for my favorite little bean, because we don't talk about him enough.

He 100% inherits Rhys's "earth-shattering" power. That extra chapter where Feyre and Rhys were deciding on a name and basically felt powers shifting in the Force when Nyx came up makes me firmly believe that.

He's a good, sweet kid but also goes through a few phases where he's an absolute nightmare to raise through no fault of his own. Nyx is a happy baby, but has zero concept of his power when it starts to show, leaving one very tired High Lord and High Lady when he shatters a window in his nursery when wiggling his arms excitedly.

He's an intuitive little guy though and very quickly figures out he needs to be careful when Feyre and Rhys try to teach him to get a handle on that power. He learns this the hard way after accidentally nightmisting one of his toys.

Nobody for the life of them can figure out why he adores cranky Auntie Amren so much. Though he's not old enough to explain it, he thinks she's another child to play with. Cassian suggests this and Amren nearly rips his head off.

Nyx is a full-fledged mama's boy. He adores Feyre and is a complete snugglebug with her. He's also very protective of his mama.

That said, he idolizes his dad too and copies everything he does. He follows Rhys around and mimics everything, right down to trying to copy the High Lord's graceful swagger. Feyre, naturally, absolutely melts at the sight of him waddling after his dad with one hand in his pocket looking too cool for school on his tiny little legs.

Nyx is obsessed with Starfall, and his first-ever painting is a finger painting of him with his parents under those stars. Rhys gets misty-eyed when he sees it.

He's besties with Kallias and Viviane's little snow angel. The fact they're the same age is perfect--when the grown-ups are too boring tending to one courtly matter or the other, Nyx and his friend can easily pass the time playing in the snow. Nyx already has met his match in the realm of snowball fighting, and takes a new tactic or two back to absolutely wallop his uncles. Rhys could not be more proud of this fact.

Nyx takes his role as Eldest Cousin very seriously, but there's one cousin in particular who absolutely does not and will not listen to a word he says. Guess whose kid that cousin is.

Nyx takes a little too much after his mother sometimes in that he befriends every semi-civil demon-thing or dark spirit that walks the face of the earth. To Uncle Cassian's absolute horror, Nyx is apparently friends with Bryaxis...and Bryaxis loves this kid.

[shawtuzi]

i’m still deciding whether i want to write for ellie or abby in my next tlou fic but until then pls enjoy these construction worker!eren hc’s bc i am sooo thirsty for him

cw include: black fem!reader, lots of fluff, lots of smut, eren being the cutest thing ever

sfw

construction worker!eren whose only dream in this life is to have a pretty wife with a litter of kids and a big ass house to go with it. he’s already slipped a gorgeous fat rock on your finger and talks of getting pregnant with your first child were slowly but surely happening which meant he was getting closer and closer to what he truly wanted most.

construction worker!eren who is a total mommas boy!! his mom is so very dear to him and to know she adores you just as much as him makes him so so happy.

construction worker!eren who looks so cute in his everyday work outfit. whenever he’s got his hard hat on around you you can’t help but knock on it a few times but it’s okay he thinks it’s super cute.

construction worker!eren who starts his day a six-thirty every morning and is always home by five o’clock on the dot. his morning routine consists of giving your forehead and lips a sweet good morning kiss as soon as his eyes open, a quick fifteen minute shower with music softly playing in the back (usually the trapsoul album by bryson tiller), making a big ass pot of coffee bc lord knows he’ll need it with the airheads he works with, quadruple checking to make sure there’s food in the fridge and pantry for you, another sweet kiss to your lips before he heads out, and then spending five minutes trying to pry you off of him while you beg him to take the day off. “m’sorry sugarplum i cant take off today, gotta save up for that big house we want you know how it is,” he’d always say before shushing your whines with a kiss full of tongue n passion.

construction worker!eren who is so tired and sore when he gets off work but is never too sore to accept one of your bone crushing hugs as soon as he walks through the door to your shared apartment. he’s always extra careful to make sure his hands that are usually covered in residue don’t touch your clothes even though you could literally care less.

construction worker!eren who facetimes you everyday around the same time to enjoy your company while he’s on his lunch break. usually the conversations consists of you telling him to make sure he’s applying a lot of sunscreen (bc this heat was nothing to play about), your plans for what you were making for dinner, and if anyone happened to piss him off that day you’ll surely hear about it.

“how’s your lunch?” you asked giving eren a loving smile as you watched him practically devour the leftover lasagna from last nights dinner. he wiped his mouth with a napkin before speaking, a content smile on his lips. “food is perfect honey tastes just as good as it did last night,” you smiled at his words but it faltered just the slightest bit when you saw how reddish pink his cheeks were. “baby have you put on any sunscreen yet? weather app says it’s supposed to be almost a hundred out today,” you pouted wishing so desperately that he was there so you could give his little sunburns kisses. eren observed his face in the tiny box on the corner of his phone, letting out a small hum. “don’t worry about me sugar i’ll put some on before we get off the phone,” he gave you a comforting smile which you returned. you folded your freshly manicured hands together before speaking, “so…for dinner i was thinking steak kabobs?” “now we’re fuckin’ talking”

construction worker!eren whose nicknames for you are sugar, sugarplum, honey, angel, and my honeysuckle (which is a type of flower heje)

construction worker!eren whose stomach is almost as big as his heart lol this man loves him a good home cooked meal!!! he doesn’t know what he did to deserve a wife who feeds him as good as you do but you best believe he thanks his lucky stars everyday for it. and yes he’s fs the kind of man to completely devour his food in record time meanwhile you’ve barely made a dent in yours, this usually leads to you splitting the rest of yours with him bc this man always has room to eat more food.

you had decided to make steaks for dinner and like usual eren had devoured his plate in less than ten minutes. “was it good my love?” you giggled taking a bite of the roasted potatoes you made as side. bc he had a full mouth all eren was able to get out was a satisfied sounding ‘mhm!’ eren had washed his dishes and put them away before making his way back to the table to keep you company while you continued to eat your food, love and adoration swarming in those jade irises of his. without a word you swiftly got out of your chair and got comfy on his lap. eren didn’t say a word but by the way he was looking at your plate you could tell he was dying for another bite. you cut off a piece of steak and held the fork up to his lips with a smile, “go ahead take a bite i know you wanna.” without a second thought eren took a bite and for the rest of dinner you took turns feeding him and yourself.

construction worker!eren who becomes even more attentive and loving than he already is once you’re finally pregnant!!! you have morning sickness?? he’s right behind you rubbing your back and even offers to brush your teeth for you after you’ve finished. you need your feet rubbed?? prop them up and he’ll get straight to work. he even takes more days off work than usual bc he misses your touch just as much as you miss his. ever since he found out there was a little him growing in you he frequently started talking to your belly.

construction worker!eren is a girl dad no ifs, ands, or buts!!!!! crazy story but he had the strongest feeling you were having a girl and low and behold on the day of your gender reveal you found out you were having a girl!! yes he cried like a baby himself and yes connie has it on video.

construction worker!eren who treats your daughter like she’s the finest china when she’s finally born :( the first time he did skin to skin contact with her he swore his heart was gonna explode with how much love his had for the tiny human in his arms. and once she was sound asleep in her lil bed he was quick to leave the hospital to buy you whatever foods you were craving—you deserved the best princess treatment for bringing his lil princess into the world.

construction worker!eren who keeps a polaroid pic of you, him, and your newborn daughter in his worn out wallet, showing it to everyone at his job…and a couple strangers….he rlly can’t help it you two are his pride and joy <333

“hey reiner did i ever show you this picture?” eren beamed holding up the polaroid in reiner’s face for the third time that day. reiner chuckled a bit before nodding, “yes eren you showed me, she’s a cute one you and y/n are lucky,” he smiled and eren nodded in agreement, still staring down at the picture. “yeah…m’the luckiest guy in the world aren’t i?”

nsfw

construction worker!eren who is six foot six and pure muscle. it’s a wonder how he eats so good and manages to look even better but hey! you weren’t complaining. he certainly was lacking down there either baby he’s the full package. his dicks eight and a half inches with two prominent veins on the underside that rubbed against your sensitive walls in the most delicious way possible.

construction worker!eren who has a raging breeding kink but is that really a surprise? whenever you two fuck and he’s able to rlly take his time with you i kid you not he has to cum inside you at least three times or he will not be satisfied. sometimes whenever he pulls out he’ll push down on your lower belly and watch his cum spill out with dark, predatory eyes. majority of the time he’ll use that as an excuse to fill you up for the umpteenth time bc he just cannot let any of his precious cum go to waste.

“so pretty,” eren had a lazy smile on his face as he watched three orgasms worth of cum ooze out of your puffy, spent pussy. just when you thought he had his fill and was ready for a much needed good nights rest you felt his one softening dick begin to harden up against your still trembling thighs. “eren…” you whimpered, but he just shushed you with a kiss mumbling a quick ‘jus one more’ before slipping back inside you with ease. he was extremely low on energy so he wasn’t quite able to fuck into you like a madman like he was before so he just settled for grinding into you. “o-oh honey! f-fuck!” you squealed wrapping your legs around his waist. between his swollen tip continuously bumping into your stomach, and the coarse hairs on his pelvis rubbing against your sensitive clit you were slowly but surely going dumb. “yeah jus’ like that, f-fuck yeah let daddy fuck a baby into you baby c’mon make me cum.”

construction worker!eren who is nawt a fan of quickies at all!! he’s a man that likes to savor the moment when it comes to sex and if he’s able to admire the faces and sounds you make then what’s the point?? when he’s got you all to himself expect to be occupied for the next couple of hours bc like i stated before he’s not satisfied until he’s cum in you at least three times and made you cum twice as much!!

construction worker!eren who is a certified MUNCH!!!! this man loves having his mouth on your pussy and yes if ur wondering he definitely eats it through your panties. he’s so sloppy and loud with it you’d almost be embarrassed if he didn’t completely turn you dumb whenever he tongue fucked your weeping pussy :(

“mm renny,” your brows scrunched together in pleasure as eren sloppily ran his tongue up and down your soaked folds. his hair was still damp from his shower and was slowly soaking the couch from the droplets falling from his locs but neither of you seemed to care. “couldn’t stop thinking about you today…i mean i already think of you all day but i kept thinking about you in that way and fuck it was so hard to focus. reiner almost ripped my head off from how distracted i was,” as he was talking he was pressing sloppy, wet kisses all over your cunt and the inside of your thighs. he inserted two fingers easily into your dripping center and couldn’t help the groan that rumbled in his chest when he saw how tight you were squeezing his fingers. “you got the prettiest pussy honey, you know that right?” he gave you a small smile before spitting directly on your clit making you jolt. you whined in embarrassment ofc and covered your face with a near throw pillow, whimpering out a pathetic ‘stop ren s’embarrasing.’ eren just hummed and attached his mouth back to your pussy, wrapping his slightly swollen lips around your throbbing clit, “m’never gonna fuckin stop my pretty little honeysuckle never ever.”

construction worker!eren who is a biggg fan of the 69 position. sometimes you suck him so good he tends to lose focus but you don’t mind in the slightest. your big strong man never stops working whether he’s on or off the clock so if he gets a little consumed in his own pleasure who are you to snap him out of it?? if you’re putting some serious work in he’ll moan n groan so loud into your pussy you could cum alone just from that!!

construction worker!eren who had the prettiest moans *sighs dreamily* he’s never shy to let you know you’re making him feel good and it’s so fucking hot hearing his breathy whines and moans especially when he accidentally overstimulates himself which he happens to do a lot heh. you’ve definitely had a couple complaints from neighbors bc of the noise but he don’t even give a fuck!! he knows it turns you on more than anything to hear him be so vocal so why on earth would he ever stop??

construction worker!eren who was soo nervous when you suggested having sex while you were pregnant. it was no problem for him at first but once you started showing that’s when the panic started to settle in—he was so afraid he’d accidentally hurt you or the baby that he kinda went on an sex hiatus much to your dismay, but after some convincing be finally gave in.

you were on your side and he was spooning you from behind, giving your shoulder or neck a kiss of encouragement every once in a while. “jus’ let me know if it hurts at all or you’re uncomfortable okay? cant believe you talked me into this…” eren mumbled into your shoulder. you replied with a soft ‘mhm’ your patience wearing thinner by the second. it had been a good couple of weeks since you and eren last had sex and you were almost sure you were beginning to lose your mind. you’d finally had enough when he came home from his morning jog looking like an absolute dream with his chest heaving and brown baby hairs sticking to his forehead. that’s how he ended up here: one hand securely holding onto your small bump while his other was slowly pushing his dick inside your awaiting entrance. “oh wow…” your eyes fluttered shut in pure bliss, toes curling once he bottomed out. “f-fuck that feel okay hun?” it felt more than okay. you brought your hand to your clit and began rubbing quick circles to dull out the stinging stretch. eren peeped this and replaced yours with his own, the rough pads of his fingers on your clit had your lips trembling. “y-you need to stop this—hah! sex strike and fuck me more please i—i miss this,” eren heard your plea and nodded feverishly. god was he a fool for ever depriving yourselves of each other, he will never be doing this again.

[colourstreakgryffin]

Okay here me out please....So reader leaves their beloved baby with their father Muzan for the night, because he said he can handle it....he can't the baby is everywhere, he can't take his eyes off of them for a minute without her just vanishing to somewhere else. Eventually baby get's of the infinity castle and finds herself being coddled by Yoriichi and Muzan is just.....`he's panicking and like he don't know what to do, so like eventually he has to fess up to reader that he fucked up and she has to go get the baby and she and yorrichi lightly have a conversation (roast session) about muzan and responsibility

I know this is a bit strange but please I just think it would be funny

Oh? Okay, okay! I’ll try my best with this and hey, we get to see Yoriichi again! I missed Yoriichi so thank you dearly for giving us the angel back! The angel and demon

If you don’t mind, I’ll name the kid myself since haven’t been given a name

Kibutsuji Muzan- Wondering Child

“Muzan, my love. All you need to do is watch Kuragari” You gently remark with a soft voice and a understanding tint, offering the newborn Kuragari to your husband as his blood reds scanned over both you and the cooing baby. Muzan scoffed under his breath at the rather easy task you given him, watch his own biological infant. He could do it blindfolded and with one arm tied to his back

The moment you walked out of the room, Muzan immediately plopped the blood red-eyed baby into his cute little playcrib as he sat down, right before Kuragari in his playarea, to pick up a nearby abandoned novel to skim through the hefty pages and pinpoint the chapter he was at. He took his eyes of the boy for only a minute or so when he realised the lack of cooing and giggling was concerning, looking up. His heart drooped in concern

He’s gone? He’s gone?! Where did he go?! He’s a baby! How is he gone already?!

Muzan almost panicked as he shot up from his comfortable plush armchair and frantically checked every nook and cranny of the spacious room for Kuragari with some… or more, all furniture thrown at the walls along the way, no success further alarmed him. How is a few months year old already more fidgety and energetic than a bumbling four year old

Muzan ended up almost destroying the entire Infinity Castle in search for a single small demon. He truly had no clue where that bouncing newborn could be and the only reason he had a decent clue was because a number of trees leading down a specific dirt path, once transported out of the Infinity Castle, had the same fang-like bite marks in them. As if a baby animal was teething on the trunks

Perfect

The King of Demons couldn’t be anymore thankful that time itself had given him a shred of mercy and averted the sky to pitch black so the glowing moon would shower cool moonlight down on his dead white complexion. His slight relief was cut short when he finally found the source of sudden familiar giggling, he knew that voice belonged to his son so he followed it

And what he saw terrified him as he definitely had his hands too tied to be able to take action

That… that bastard, Tsugikuni Yoriichi holding his precious baby boy in his lap as Kuragari happily rose his cute tiny hands up to touch Yoriichi’s much bigger, calloused palms. The monstrous human had a very shocked expression on his face as his plum reds looked ready to swell up in tears, his heart touched by the Prince of Demons being so sweet and playful, despite being the enemy

Muzan knew very well he couldn’t intervene at all as the last time he hardly butted heads with that Yoriichi. He only got away with one single strand of his entire being left, it was far too close for his comfort though, he knew he also needed to get his beloved Kuragari back. The only solution that came to his head was you, the boy’s mother

You were a human, just like Yorichi. You could get the boy back, no problem. Unlike Muzan himself

Cemented on his meticulous plan to get his baby back from that beast, Muzan rushed back to the Infinity Castle at his top speed and seemingly arrived in the same room you stood before, just in the nick of time to greet you. “Greetings, my love. Where’s Kuragari?” You ask softly and almost immediately, out of concern as Muzan flinches guilty, sighing out to try relieve him of the stress. He should just tell you, no need to lie or gaslight you into believing such nonsense

“You know that beast, Tsugikuni. He has stolen our son. I only took my eyes off him for a minute, if not two and he was gone, I luckily tracked him down by the teeth marks on trees but I cannot get him back, you know” You sighed displeased, part of you knew this simple task would end in absolute disaster but since you loved the clueless demons, you just flashed a sweet, gentle smile and took his hand encouragingly

“Let’s go find our Kuragari then, my dear”

Laughing joyfully with your precious Kuragari sat on your lap, fiddling and pulling on the lengthy ends of your haori to entertain himself and satisfy his curiosity. You were perched on the open wooden edge-skirt of the homely Minka belonging to the one and only swordsman that ruled the battlefield with a platinum fist, Yoriichi himself. The same Yoriichi who apparently ‘stole’ your son but you got the actual picture from Yoriichi and it made you realise your husband is no where near competent with childcare

“I found this one crawling around my backyard. I don’t know how he got there but he seemed to have travelled miles and was hungry, he kept biting at everything” Every word that human man said felt very genuine and you weren’t ever gonna try deny that him and his statements were

His explanation of the situation made much more sense than what Muzan proclaimed happened, such a weird one nevertheless. Yoriichi didn’t even know your son existed in the first place, why would he go after him?

Needless to say… you and Yoriichi spent almost a hour trading innocent insults at Muzan and his so-called parenting style. You didn’t really hate your husband, he actually tried and took responsibility by telling you about losing him but he should always be watching Kuragari, the newborn should never left alone not had eyes taken off him for even a minute and somebody like Yorichi, who lost his soon-to-be-born child to a demon, knows that

You have learnt to never entrust Kuragari to Muzan, you will just have to go to Yoriichi instead

[kotias]

We Are in Our Eden - Until Our Stars No Longer Shine

A little reprieve from the angst war @opscuritas

Fluff story written with @daneecastle

Word count: 1492 words

Crowley was out for the day, and had stopped by a cliff close to Aberdeen, with the grandest view to the ocean he could experience in the country. The wind was strong, almost pushing him away, and he laughed. What a view! The waves crashing against the rocks beneath him, the smell of iodine taking into his nostrils, and most of all, the view of the sun setting on the infinite horizon, spreading its yellows and reds and purples onto this side of the world. But it was only when he lifted his head and watched above that he noticed- He took his phone out of his pocket and called home. “Angel! Come here! Cruden Bay, the highest cliff you can find!" He knew he had an unexpected squeal in the middle of that call- well, it was guaranteed to give his angel some form of curiosity, at least. He looked up again, a bright smile on his face.

“Cruden Bay? But why? It's almost time to eat!" he heard over the phone, and didn’t say a word. Just the next second, he heard the familiar flutter of white wings behind him. “Crowley, what is it?”

He instantly caught his hand, dragged him a little further up, feeling like a teenage girl eager to spend time with her crush. He was jittery, smiling, squealing- "Look!" He pointed to the stars. Shooting stars in the sky, crossing the ozone layer, lighting up like fireworks. He could barely stay put, looking at them with the wonder of a child- and he knew it was an unreasonable reaction- he knew! But this was the first time he had the opportunity to watch them with Aziraphale. Pressing his fingers around the angel’s, he looked back at him, caught the adoration in his eyes, the immensity of his love for him, trapped behind those perfect eyes, changing with his emotions, and the slight blush he was showing. Crowley was over the moon- it mattered not whether the angel had really looked at what he was trying to show him. And the stars- the stars! So close to his reach! 

An idea came- he raised Aziraphale's hand and kissed it, before letting go of him and coming to the very edge of the cliff. Raising his left hand and snapping his fingers, he said "Here, boy!" And one of the shooting stars changed directions entirely, flinging in their direction and stopping right at his feet for him to collect two good pieces of it. He tapped it like a good dog and snapped his fingers again, leaving it to go back to its path. The rocks between his fingers were hot, almost crisp in his hand. And they smelled... so unique. He turned to Aziraphale again and showed them to him. "There's something I love about those shooting stars," he said, looking at the rocks like he would a child.

“What is it?” Aziraphale asked with a sweet, enamoured voice, never looking away from him. “I would love to know.”

He let out a small giggle. "It's a piece of Heaven, wrapped in the fires we find in Hell... falling on Earth. It feels like home. And also-" He turned to the shooting stars again. "My eyes aren't the best at seeing far. I miss a lot of the star lights that you describe to me. But the shooting stars? I can see them."

Aziraphale stepped closer to him, his deep blue eyes draping themselves in an emerald shroud. "Maybe…” He lightly touched his arms, caressing them with his thumbs. “Someday we could ask God to have your eyes changed back, so you could see the splendour of the world you helped create." He kissed Crowley's forehead. "I'm sure, after all you've done, She wouldn't mind."

Crowley shook his head slightly, losing his train of thought as Aziraphale’s slight sadness in his voice was gnawing at his euphoria. "Ah, yes, well- I think you'd miss the yellow in my eyes, wouldn't you?" 

"I would, I won't deny it, but-" He kissed him one, twice, and reverted back to his little star babies in his hand. "Here, hold this-" He handed him one of the two rocks and cradled the other between his two hands. "Let see if I can still-" His eyes lit up as he felt his power surge into it. "Yes!" When he uncovered it, it was glowing like a little sun, and he beamed at his angel, who couldn’t take his eyes from it, shining in unison with it. For a moment, he paused, only looking at him and how beautiful of a sight his amazement was, everytime he showed him something different from what he knew.

He cleared his throat. “Okay, now-" He held the little star up, pointing it to the darkening skies. “What do you want to be called, little one?" It was like an old music sheet had been rediscovered. The little star glowed, surrounded his hand in affection. He smiled. “Ah, I see. How about-" The little star extended to his forearm. “Oh!" He gave a glance at Aziraphale. “Naming it would mean giving it to the sky. I believe it doesn't want that, it's clutching onto me right now." He pulled his hand back to their levels as the angel chuckled. “Perfect little thing, why would you insist on staying with me?" he asked, like one would to a small child. 

“What wouldn't want to be with you?" he heard Aziraphale answer with a dreamy sigh, and he chortled.

“You’re barely objective, angel, we’ve known each other for-” A little power coursed from the star to his chest. “Oh-" Tenderly, he passed his fingers on the edges of the little thing. “Okay then- Angel, could you give me the second one? Thanks," he said as he received it, and kissed his nose. “Okay little star, do you want to help me, then?” He weighed the rock and the star; then, pressing the rock a little harder, he parted it in halves. The little star lightened excitedly. "Yes? That what you want?" He approached his two hands until they touched, and the little star crossed them to engulf the two new little rocks. He smiled and looked at Aziraphale. "It wants to stay with us, you see- so it's preparing a nest. I hope- I think you'll like the result."

The little star melted into the rocks, and the rocks melted into the star. Glowing brightly into Crowley's hands, they were exuding a homey warmth, and he let the three elements figure out what they wanted first, before guiding them gently into a form. For a second, his eyes darted to Aziraphale's hands, and he got back to work. They were shining so beautifully, he thought, as they let themselves be moulded by his attentions. After about a minute of working together, he blew on them, revealing two rings; one obsidian, textured like the meteorites coming from space and speckled with little twinkles all over it; the other perfectly white, gleaming like a happy little star, with a thin, tiny little black snake coursing its way all around it. He looked into his angel’s bright eyes, asking the question silently. Would you like me to put it on your finger? To make you mine for eternity? 

Aziraphale gasped as he watched the rings come into existence, shining like their very own little stars, tethered to the world that they had called their own. He felt stunned, overjoyed and excited, on the verge of tears as he realised what they were meant for, what Crowley had done to them, bearing the promise of their eternal loyalty to one another. For quite a long time, he was staring at the rings, far from Crowley’s expectant eyes, until he shook himself off; they knew, the both of them, and many years had passed since they had truly needed the words to express this intense sentiment they felt for one another, or the promise of an everliving love for one another. Yet, he gave a vocal answer. “Oh, you silly demon… Of course I would.”

His smile warmed him like a fireplace during the winter, his fingers wrapping around his hand made his heart flutter, and his kiss felt like a cloud.

The white ring slid perfectly on his finger, and he felt its otherworldly warmth on his skin, draping around him and offering just a bit of Crowley’s essence to mix into his own, his final oath in this union they were making for themselves.

The demon slid his own, dark ring on his finger, then passed his hand into Aziraphale’s hair and sealed their lips and their Vows together with a kiss. Together like they had been since the beginning, and never intending to part, they were an us, like God most certainly had intended.

[novankenn]

The Fundraiser

Jaune was a little nervous. It had been four months since he had seen his twin sister Joan. He knew she had taken his running off... extremely badly, so he was worried about how she was going to react when she saw him. As the bullhead landed, Jaune swallowed nervously. His knees actually started to quiver as the hatch opened.

????: JAUNE!

Jaune was bowled over by a blond haired missile, and when his head stopped swimming he found himself looking into the blue eyes of his twin sister, who was firmly seated upon his chest.

Jaune: Hi Joan.

Joan: You stupid, ignorance, disloyal, jerk! How dare you!

Jaune: I'm sorry?

Joan: Sorry? You WILL be sorry! You left me alone... with them, how could you?

Jaune: I'm sorry... but Belle and Bella really like you! They couldn't have been...

Joan: I'm talking about mom and dad! Dad was convinced you had been eaten by grimm, and mom spent four weeks crying about how she lost her baby boy to some cradle robbing skank!

Jaune: Well... neither of those things happened, so...

Joan: And you NEVER did once write me! I had to reach out to Auntie to find you!

Jaune: You didn't... please say you didn't!

????: She did.

A ominous shadow fell over the two siblings. Who both looked up to see the grinning face of Glynda Goodwitch... their mom's twin sister.

Jaune: What have you done...

Glynda: So as you can see Joan, Jaune is fine, I've been keeping him safe.

Joan: Thank you Auntie.

Glynda: You are welcome. Now... you BOTH owe me a favor and tonight I am cashing it in.

Joan/ Jaune: And the favor is?

Glynda: You are going to help me with the Annual Beacon Charity Auction. I have your... uniforms in my apartment.

Joan: That doesn't sound so bad.

Jaune: Don't jinx it!

Joan and Jaune were hot and exhausted. Neither was happy with the Holiday elf outfits they were having to wear, that included bell topped pointy hats, and curly shoes. Though the short skirt that Joan had to wear was a little better than the nearly pained on shorts Jaune had on.

Joan: I'm tired. Is this almost over?

Jaune: Yeah, I think so. That was the last lot we had to move.

Joan: Good. I want a shower and to cuddle you, like we used to.

Jaune: Soon, Joan. Soon.

Glynda: Thank you all for your support of the Vale Orphanage and Food Bank!

Crowd clapping politely.

Glynda: Now for our last special client only lot... lot double J.

Joan: I though you said... ?

Jaune: It was.

Joan: Then where is this Double J lot?

Jaune: I... HEY!

Joan: EEP!

The Pair felt themselves lifted into the air and pulled through the curtains, finding themselves in front of the several of their friends and strangers.

Glynda: Now before I start the bidding, here are some of the details. Lot Double J is of a set of Arc twins. Jaune and Joan. They are and I quote "Perfect House-Husband and House-Wife material".

Joan/ Jaune: Mom SOLD US OUT!

Glynda: While their combat ratings is at E rank, that is of little concern. They both have Baking Skills at Rank A. Rank B Housekeeping. Rank B Laundry. Rank S Cooking. Rank A+ Child rearing...

The room was filled with polite clapping.

Glynda: AND Rank SSS Stamina... you know what that means...

Once again the room filled with clapping... very loud and aggressive clapping.

Glynda: This lot is to be sold as a set, and yes the marriage documentation is ready for signature. So do I have an opening bid of...

???? 30,000!

Jaune: Weiss? What the hell?

Joan: Whose Weiss?

???? 45,000

Jaune: PYRRHA!

Joan: Was that you're partner?

Weiss: Back off Nikos! Those blond angels are mine! 55,000!

Jaune: So you want him now? Pathetic Schnee. 75,000!

Weiss: Pathetic? Who was too much of a coward to admit her feelings? 85,000!

Jaune: Feelings?

Joan: I think she likes you.

Jaune: Great, but right now she's trying to buy OUR hands in marriage!

Joan: Oh, yeah right.

Pyrrha: I was scared! I didn't want to drive him away... but I can't not take this chance! I LOVE YOU JAUNE and I'll LOVE JOAN just as equally! 100,000!

Joan: Awe, that's sweet.

Jaune: Joan their trying to BUY us!

Joan: You trying to tell me, you don't want someone who is interested in us, who can provide for us, and all we have to do... is the shit mom and dad had us do all the time?

Jaune: Well...

Joan: Plus... you do know what Husbands and Wives get to do... and do a lot right?

Jaune: Oh...

Weiss: The Arc and Schnee name must be joined! With those two at my side I will fix the SDC and with their loving support, I'll make reparations to all the people my father has hurt! 250,000!

Joan: Arc-Schnee?

Jaune: Schnee-Arc? Nah. Arc-Schnee, sounds better.

Joan: Right?

Pyrrha: No... I will NOT lose to some spoiled princess, using her daddy's money! 500,000, and I'll sign over the Royalty Rights for Pumpkin Pete's to Beacon for administration to local Vale charities! That's another 200,000 per year!

Glynda: Um...

Looks over to the lawyers, administrator and observers.

Glynda: Can we accept that?

The lawyers, administrator, and observers all shrug their shoulders.

Joan: Pyrrha seems nice.

Jaune: Oh she is. She saved my life at initation.

Joan: Really?

Glynda: Okay... 500,000 upfront, pl;us 200,000 per annum... going once!

Murmurs from the crowd.

Glynda: Going twice!

Weiss just crosses her arms over her chest, and shoots Glynda a wink.

Glynda: SOLD!

BANG BANG BANG

Joan: Wow... that's a lot of money to help the needy.

Jaune: It is. But are you okay with this? I mean we're going to end up jointly married to the same person...

Joan: It was bound to happen... considering mom and auntie.

Jaune: True. Ture.

Glynda: Lot Double J goes to Pyrrha Nikos for the sum of 500,000 lien and an annual contribution of a further 200,000. Congratulations! To everyone, thank you for attending, and your support.

Joan: Jaune... why am I feeling scared now?

Jaune: I don't know... but I'm feeling it too.

[joekeeryswife]

Sweetness and anger - e.m & s.h

hello angels! i hope everyone is doing okay, here is a part two to my most recent steddie x reader fic. thank you to @caseyqdilla for the idea (i hope this was okay)! enjoy reading 🩷🩷

taglist (feel free to add yourselves 🩷) @eddieamoremio @loverboy-poems @ladyapplejackdnd @alexxavicry @lovurry @bibieddiesgf @plk-18 @m-rae23 @adaydreamaway08 @missabsey (if there’s a line through your name i can’t tag you x)

you had given birth to your sweet baby girl Penny just five days ago and it had been the most surreal experience. becoming a mum to this perfect little girl just changed your whole life and you couldn't be happier that she was finally here.

Steve and Eddie hadn't left your babies side since she was born. it was usually them who would wake up to change her in the night, or they would rush to calm her down if she wasn't hungry and they were the perfect dads any child could ask for.

you had decided today was the perfect day for you all to travel to Hawkins so everyone could meet your baby girl and the first stop was Wayne. Eddie had begged you and Steve to let Wayne be the first person from all of your families to meet her and you agreed. he had been the person all three of you could go to when you needed something and it meant a lot to Eddie.

"you girls okay back there?" Steve asked looking in his rear view mirror at you and Penny who were sat comfortably in the back. your eyes never left her sleeping body as you nodded and smiled. it was a little bit uncomfortable being sat in a car for a few hours but you knew that it would be good for you to get out of the house and see your family again, you also weren't to far away from the garage.

your finger was stroking Penny's cheek lightly as she slept in her car seat, her face scrunching slightly at the touch but her expression soon turned peaceful again. you were still in shock that you were actually a mum and it was crazy to think that you'd be looking after her for her whole life.

"Wayne called this morning, i've never heard him sound so excited" Eddie turned to look at you from the front making your focus shift from Penny to Eddie. "he's been excited to meet her since we told him, i bet he was getting impatient" Steve joked making Eddie slap his shoulder lightly.

"he's a very patient man Steve" you rolled your eyes as the two of them bickered back and forth, even with them becoming dads they still acted like kids. you looked down at Penny who was now awake and looking around the car. the boys had woken her up and you were surprised she wasn't crying.

"did you dads wake you up?" she had a frown on her face now. for a newborn she was really expressive and seeing them were just adorable even if she was trying to be mad. after the boys heard you speaking to your now awake baby they shut up and Eddie turned to look at you.

"shit, is she awake?" Steve glanced at you in the rear view mirror again as Eddie spoke to you. you nodded your finger stroking over her cheek again. "it's okay, it's not like she was going to sleep for the whole journey anyway, how far away are we from the garage?"

the only place Wayne could meet Penny was at the garage. he had tried to get in a few different members of staff to cover his shift so he could meet her at his trailer but was unsuccessful so you decided because you knew he was desperate to meet his granddaughter going to the garage was the next best thing.

"about five minutes, why what's wrong? do we need to stop" even before becoming a dad Steve was always making sure everyone was safe and would always ask if they needed anything. "no nothing, it's just i'm pretty sure she's hungry but we are almost there so we don't have to. i'll feed her when we get there"

Steve only nodded and drove around Hawkins to the garage. you were all nervous, Wayne would be the first person to meet Penny and this was huge. the first grandchild on all of your sides and it was a big thing. it was the newest generation and it was so surreal that only a few years ago you were all fighting monsters and had a crazy life, now you were parents.

you were now outside the garage still sat in the car feeding a hungry Penny. you had her and you covered with a nursing cloth making sure that no one could see you or Penny. breastfeeding was a very intimate and private experience and you wanted to feel comfortable without feeling watched so Eddie and Steve being the amazing partners they were kept watch outside the car to make sure no creeps were looking inside.

once Penny was fed and burped you put her back into her car seat and opened the car door. Eddie helped you out of the car whilst Steve got Penny out, holding the car seat tightly to be careful he didn't drop her (not like he would anyway he was just very cautious).

you walked into the garage arm linked around Eddie's with Steve walking a bit in front of the two of you. Wayne's head popped up out of a car and a huge smile took over his face. "oh my goodness" he threw a oily rag over his shoulder and walked over to the four of you.

you unlinked your arms from Eddie's knowing Wayne would go straight over to him. your thoughts were correct, he immediately pulled Eddie into a hug and patted him on the back. you felt a swell of love in your chest as you watched the small interaction, it was beautiful to see.

"congratulations" he said as he pulled away and looked at the small car seat on Steve's arm. again, Penny was sleeping, her peaceful expression showing of her prominent features that looked identical to yours except she plumper lips and deep brown eyes. her hair was brown and thick, now you knew why you had terrible heart burn.

"would you look at that, she's beautiful" Wayne teared up, he was a grandad now and he couldn't believe it. "i'll just go wash my hands, i'll be right back. Eddie you know where my office is" he left the three of you to go to the bathroom.

you all moved to Wayne's office and you sat down on the chair in front of the desk. you had a lot of pain after giving birth, you'd gotten a few stitches and it hurt a lot. Steve placed the car seat on top of the desk and unclipped Penny, gently pulling her out and placing her in his chest. he swayed slightly and placed a few kisses to her head.

"sorry for taking so long, Troy was being an asshole" Wayne sat down in his chair which was opposite to you and held his arms out. it had been years since he last held a baby but he was pretty sure he could remember how to. he had been reading a few (a lot) of books on babies just to figure out how to hold her (and found out a lot of other things just in case he ever had to babysit).

Steve placed Penny in Wayne's arms and he swore he'd never seen anything more beautiful in his entire life. his chin quivered and his eyes filled with tears as he looked at Penny who was still fast asleep. "i'll be right back" Eddie said placing a delicate kiss on your forehead before leaving Wayne's office.

"she's absolutely beautiful" Wayne sniffled but quickly composed himself "how was the birth y/n? i don't really know what happened, all i know is Eddie nearly missed it" you only nodded, still hurt from what happened only five days prior. "well the birth was okay because Eddie made it just in time but the boys never answered the phone. Steve had called them all day and no one picked up"

"i have no idea if they were pulling a prank or something but i called from like 9am to two hours before she was born and no one answered. i'm surprised Eddie even made it" Steve stood behind you, a hand rubbing your shoulder. "it was scary. i was so worried that he wasn't going to make it because those stupid people not answering the phone. Steve called all day" you were hurt deep down. you had all wanted to be together when you were in labour and he had gotten that opportunity taken away from him.

"i called from like 9am to two hours before she was born. i'm surprised Eddie even made it" Steve shook his head at the thought. Wayne turned his attention back to the sweet baby girl in his arms who was now fussing. "i'll take her" Steve said as he walked around the desk to take her. "you both do know that those boys are here today" after hearing that you felt anger surge through your body. you knew you shouldn't blow up like this but knowing the two of them were there meant you could give them some advice.

Eddie had gone to see Troy and Adam who were both in the office they had been five days prior. Adam was on the phone doing his job like he was supposed to do but Troy had his feet on the desk and was chucking a paper ball up into the air, he looked bored. once Adam noticed Eddie he quickly and politely ended the phone call and his face changed into sympathy.

however when Troy noticed Eddie standing in the doorway he smiled and shook his head. Adam spoke first "Eddie i am so sorry for what happened the other day, did you make it-" "i knew you were fucking with us. there's no baby here" Troy laughed obnoxiously, cutting Adam off but Eddie stood there shaking his head.

"there is a baby you asshole and you two are lucky that i'm here and my girlfriend isn't" Eddie scoffed and Adam looked down at his hands, he was shaking nervously. "i am truly sorry Eddie, i shouldn't of even followed through with what Troy said" Troy scoffed loudly and rolled his eyes.

"oh shut up you wuss. it's fine, jesus. it was a prank get over it" you saw Eddie standing in the doorway of an office and fast walked toward him, ignoring the pain in your body. "it's just a baby it's no big deal, you act like you're never going to have another one. your girlfriend will get over it anyway. if not she's a complete psycho and needs help" you were stood behind Eddie but after hearing that you squeezed in front of him.

"woah, who are you" Troy smirked, winking at you making you feel sick. he was disgusting. "i'm the girlfriend you just called a psycho you asshole" this made his smirk drop quickly. "you both are so stupid, do you have any idea what could of happened if Eddie didn't come in here when he did?" Adam just looked down again.

he felt stupid for even doing the stupid prank. "you need to grow up. you're somehow an adult which blows my mind because you act like a kid, it's embarrassing. what possessed you two to think not answering the phone was a good idea? it's your job for god sake and i'm surprised you're both even here" your face felt hot with anger as you looked between the two boys. you felt hot angry tears in your eyes, your hormones all over the place as you ripped into the two men in front of you.

you could tell by their different body language who was sorry and who wasn't. "i know it doesn't change it but i am sorry for not answering the phone. it was a one time thing and it was stupid" Adam said, his face was bright red with embarrassment as he realised what could of happened. he had thought about it for the last few days and every time he did think about it he felt sick, how stupid could he be?

“and if you think that we can just ‘have another baby’ it doesn’t work like that. you have no idea how many kids we want and of this was the only child we wanted then you robbed us from that special experience. yeah Eddie was there for the pregnancy and the birth but the labouring part is just as important and you ruined that. now you need to grow up, seriously.” a few tears ran down your face as you felt more anger inside of you.

your words were mainly directed at Troy who’s smug look had reappeared on his face. “one day you will realise, if you find someone stupid enough to even be with you, how special it is and how important it is for some people to have their partner there during labour. now i know you had no idea that i was going to give birth that day, none of us knew but pulling a stupid prank like that can be really dangerous. you could of left people stranded on the road. no more pranks, got it?”

you looked between the two boys, Troy was rolling his eyes but you knew of you carried on you wouldn’t stop but Adam nodded and apologised again you only nodded before turning back to Troy “you’re an asshole, you don’t come here for pranks you come here to work, that’s what you’re expected to do. now come on Eddie we have more people to see” with that you walked away from the three boys and wiped your tears as you left the room, Steve being outside the door with Penny in his chest with the car seat in his hand.

you and Steve walked to the car leaving Eddie still in the office. Troy now had his head down as he let your words sink in but he didn’t feel remorseful, only a little embarrassed but he tried to cover it. “Adam we accept your apology, i hope it won’t happen again” Adam promptly nodded and reassured Eddie he wouldn’t be influenced by Troy again.

“oh and Troy” Troy lifted his head to look at Eddie expecting the exact same thing to be said to him, his smirk had also reappeared “you’re fired” it was Eddie’s turn to smile at him but his was sarcastic and pissed Troy off. Eddie could hear you calling for him from the car “now if you excuse me i have to go see my sweet family and my lovely in laws, bye” Eddie left smiling, hearing the shouts of an annoyed Troy who most definitely deserved to be fired.

[hwashotcheeto]

𝑨𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝑳𝒊𝒇𝒆

Park Seonghwa X amab!reader

Summary: You realize that your dreams of naturally having a child with your love aren't going to work out as you hoped

WC: 1k

CW: Lil bit of smut in the beginning, (unprotected anal sex, handjob, orgasm for both, that's about it) angst, hurt comfort, crying, fluff, pet names (babyboy, love, sweetheart, prince), talks of conception, babies, adoption, surrogacy

AN: This is based off of this post by @the-quiet-nerd-guy, who gave me permission to write this, so thank you. 💜

As always, thank you also to @malldreamprincess for the moodboard, I love you, angel. 💜

If you're a person who doesn't like the idea of having children, then this isn't for you. But this made me emotional writing it, because it hits pretty close to home, as I'm an afab person in a relationship with another afab person, and we both want to have children.

Okay that's enough sharing, let's get to the fic.

“Seonghwa!” You cried out as he pounded into you, bent over, your face in the pillows and your hands gripping the bed. Seonghwa had one hand on your hip and the other on the mattress to hold himself above you, with his lips right by your ear.

“I got you, prince,” he breathed, his voice strained. “It's okay, you can come for me.” His voice began to taper off and get caught up in breathless whimpers and whines. He was almost there too.

Your thighs quivered as you felt your climax right on the edge. Oh, you were right there, you could feel the sweet release. You just needed a little more, something to push you over-

Seonghwa let go of your hip and reached down to stroke you, and before he could even say it, you came all over his hand with a shriek of his name.

“Oh fuck, yes babyboy.” Seonghwa's voice was high, verging on whimpering. “I'm right there, just a little more-” He still stroked you, his body going on autopilot, just chasing that release he craved.

Until he finally did, hugging you tight with one arm as he pumped you full.

“Shit, sweetheart. Oh, that's my good boy. Such a good boy for me.”

The praise makes you smile as you're limp on the bed, getting your breath back. Your eyes are closed from the exhaustion of the intense session, and you almost feel like you could pass out right now.

“Hey, don't sleep on me yet,” Seonghwa softly called, rubbing your back. You whined in protest, to which he couldn't help but smile. “I won't keep you up long, don't worry.”

Seonghwa slowly pulled out of you, making you both grunt softly. Your body fully relaxed into the bed, sleep slowly creeping up your spine and into your head, forcing your eyes closed.

Quickly, before he lost you, Seonghwa grabbed a towel to clean you both up. You whined in protest when he rolled you onto your back to run the towel over your body.

You knew your boyfriend frantically cleaned everything every chance he got. Spotless, perfect, not a speck of dust on anything on Seonghwa's watch. You, however, we're exhausted, and couldn't wait to cuddle up in his arms to sleep.

Eventually, he did get back into bed, after forcing you to at least put on a pair of boxers. Seonghwa did the same, then cuddled you, holding you against his chest.

And you were happy. You were home. Just like this. Everything was perfect. This life you had with Seonghwa was a dream. A gorgeous, loving, and attentive boyfriend who loved you as much as you loved him.

You had a house together, careers you both were happy with, and you both were thinking about getting engaged and married.

A perfect fairy tale life. The one you both had always dreamed of.

But there was one thing missing.

“You know, Hwa,” you said softly, opening your eyes. He let out a soft “hmm?” as he was slowly rubbing your back. “I wish we could have kids.”

“We can,” Seonghwa mumbled back, sleep finally grabbing onto him too. “We could get a surrogate, or adopt. There's tons of children that need families-”

“I know,” you interrupted. “I just…” You trailed off, not knowing how to continue. You had the idea in your head, you just didn't know how to make it come out.

But Seonghwa understood. “You want them to be ours.”

You nodded. You'd fantasized about having children since you yourself were a child. Of seeing someone you love have your child, a beautiful little angel you and your love could call your own.

And you'd planned for that. Until you fell in love with Seonghwa.

And now you could never have your own child. A surrogate was the closest you could get, but it wouldn't be the same.

Of course, any child you adopted or had through surrogacy would be loved dearly. You'd love them like you would a child made by you and Seonghwa.

But there'll always be that little voice that would tell you they're not really yours. They're not really your child.

And that makes you burst into tears and hide in Seonghwa's chest.

You didn't want that to be what you thought of when you looked at your child. You would love any child you had, no matter what. But knowing they'd be a part of you that constantly brought up the fact that they weren't truly you, they'd never be from you, broke your heart.

Seonghwa held you tight, not knowing what was in your head, but feeling your similar pain. He, too, had thought about having his own children. But his life set him on a different path than he'd planned.

“I'm glad we can still have children,” you sobbed, “I just wish we could have them ourselves.”

“I know, love.” Seonghwa was still rubbing your back, doing his best to soothe you. “I know. I wish we could too.”

You hugged him tighter as another sob bubbled up out of your throat. “Maybe in another life we can,” you whimpered. “I just have to make peace with the fact I won't experience it in this life.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” Seonghwa started, but another wave of tears cascaded down your face, and you were overcome with sobs.

You cried until there were no tears left. Until you'd gone silent. Seonghwa still watched over you as all your thoughts tumbled around in your head, as if he could see them. As if they were like Saturn's rings, orbiting around you.

The crying exhausted you further, and you let your eyes fall closed again. Seonghwa shifted so you both were more comfortable, still holding you protectively.

“Seonghwa?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you think we're lovers in every life?”

Seonghwa didn't respond right away. Of course, his first answer was “I want us to be,” but he wondered if that meant you'd both be men in every life.

Do souls carry a specific gender? Do they always choose the same body type? Probably not.

If that was the case, then maybe there was a life, past or future, where you two could naturally have a child together. There had to be, right?

So what he finally said was:

“Sweetheart, I hope we're together until time itself stops.”

Thank you for reading! Please reblog if you enjoyed! 💜

This is a work of fiction written by me. This does not represent the idol in any way. Any re-upload is not allowed and will be reported.

[ananke-xiii]

Form and Void... Hands and Hearts.

Intro + the post before this you kinda need to read them all or it won't make a lot of sense lol

Dean and Crowley's relationship is not fun.

Full disclosure here: I have no problems in terms of shipping and having fun with the characters outside of what's canon but I personally don't see Dean's canon relationship with Crowley as "fun", it's not something that I particularly enjoy watching. Like, the actors are great etc. but the actual story makes me feel... uncomfortable. I actually find it sad that Dean's still attached to Crowley because, as much as I like him as a character, the King of Hell acts like a total predator towards Dean and this episode highlights this side of their relationship in uncomfortable ways. So be warned that things get a little ugly from here.

Let's see how food is treated in the episode: Crowley is presented as "Father Crowley" while he puts sugar in his tea and calls Dean "a rather scrumptious altar boy". The image I get from this is both that of the sugar daddy and, because of the religious references, of the scandals surrounding the Vatican and its priests (I'm trying to be as sensitive as I can but the show is really not and Crowley literally makes a reference to these events later on in the episode).

Father Crowley is a piece of shit.

He will later pull up in a van and kidnap young Amara with this line:

My, haven't you grown into a sweet young thing? Want some candy, little girl?

If we consider that Amara and Dean are connected (by the mark that's above Amara's heart and that was on Dean's right arm) Dean and Crowley's past relationship doesn't look so much fun anymore (well, it never was fun to begin with as I've written although the show did its best to make it look like it was fun with the karaoke, the cowboy hats and the sex. I mean, on paper it does look like fun if we can just forget that Dean was very much Crowley's guinea pig).

In case you were wondering, Dean and Amara are bound guys.

Crowley here is the preacher/hunter of "The Night of the Hunter". He dresses like a priest but he's hunting for demons (yeah, I know, it's a clear reference to "The Exorcist" too). He happens to find "the child that eats the souls" and proceed to kidnap her. I mean, brrrrr.

And how does Dean feel about it? He still loves him! Poor, poor, poor Dean.

While Sam went for the heart of Poor Guy with the electrocution device, the angels went for Cas' heart (and other parts too) with the angel blades, Dean goes for Crowley's heart with Ruby's knife. Unlike Sam and the angels, he doesn't finish what he had set up to do.

Dean's knife is pointed at Crowley's heart but I'm bad at taking screenshots so this is what you get.

Instead, he pins Crowley's to the wall by stabbing his left hand (the hand of love and receiving) with an angel blade. Visually, it's quite similar (not the same, similar) thing that happened to Cas at the end of S10. It couldn't be more sexual (angels blades are the dicks, also interesting choice of weapon to stab Crowley: Cas' ghost in their relationship is ever present) and more problematic: in a heartbeat Dean goes from prey to predator.

They re-used this very explicit image in S12.

Just like Dean is bound to Amara, he's still bound to his former abuser Crowley. And, I mean, from a storytelling pov it tracks because Amara is very much Crowley's and Dean's baby ("You're very maternal, Dean"). Yeah, I can hear your "ewwww" from here knowing where they went with Dean and Amara but I didn't write the show, they did and I'm picking up the things they've put down. Anyway, Dean and Crowley's relationship will be over only once Dean's not bound to Amara anymore. Or, at least, it should be but like any love triangle writers liked to milk it unti it was dry, i.e. one of the three permadied. This is why, I think, we had the echoes of the same trite trope in S12 too and if you enjoyed it good for you. For me it was torture.

Demons would be the perfect angels. Sam too.

A SPN-related theory of mine is that demons would make perfect angels. Both demons and angels are cursed with the "I get what I want" mentality. Abbadon said it, Crowley says it again in this episode. It's a very angel-like mentality, however demons are unironically more likely to put in the effort, follow the guidelines, work behind the curtains. They would be perfect angels for Chuck.

Ironically this time, angels and demons have hardly ever gotten what they wanted (hello Castiel!). They all tend to work in a certain direction only for the result to backfire in the end or leave them dead. Which reminds of a certain character named Sam Winchester.

"Form and Void" is an episode that explicity parallels Sam to the angels and to Crowley. Sam and Crowley's parallels are my everything. Up until s8 they were quite obvious while after that they're in the story's backbone rather than clearly on screen. If you care, this is one of the reasons why Crowley and Lucifer's power struggle could've been way more interesting if they had thrown in Sam in some capacity instead of doing whatever they did with Sam in s12. *breathes and calms down*

The End (of this rambling post).

"Form and Void" foreshadows how S11 would end: dark and light becoming One. It's something that US tv shows (tended to) do a lot when they deal with Christian themes: when they're going a little over the edge and very close to blasphemy they pull a "Eastern Mysticism" card to signal that they were just kidding! In SPN they did the same thing to Jack in s15. When they deal with God they use buddhist concepts as a cop-out to avoid doing things that may upset Christian believers (and no, canon bisexual God is less of a threat than canon God's older sister who's more powerful, female-presenting and holding a huuuuge grudge or than having a world with no God, no Hell and no Heaven).

Hands and hearts are a huge motifs and they signal what the characters will be doing and/or their true intention/identity. In order to see this, though, one must pay appention to the scene shown at the very beginning of the episode, a scene from the movie "The Night of the Hunter". This specific scene tells us that what we see is the opposite of what the writers mean and that the core theme of S11 is not so much God vs The Darkness but rather love. This love, however, lies in cages protected by keys and it's secret and forbidden but, as that scene tells us, love's a-winnin'. To save the day and let Love still win we've got a giant plot-twist in the form of maternal love and the resurrection of Mary Winchester. The heart's needs are met, its wants are still unknown. You can't always get what you want... SPN really did believe that.

[portgasdash]

The Vinsmoke Brothers as Dads/expecting Dads headcanons.

this was inspired mostly by @moonlit-mystery-writer and her three part series of headcanons for other one piece men as dads I HAD to do it for the RBG boys(Plus she was fueling and encouraging me as well don’t lie.). Anyway here we go!

Ichiji

This guy, like his brothers, probably had some thought they were impotent due to their extensive genetic modifications. So when you approached the future king of Germa to announce that he will soon have an heir, shock was definitely written all over his face.

He recovers quickly, hes the future king of course he does, and has that calm mysterious smirk on his face within seconds. “Good to hear. Germa’s future will be secured with this knowledge”

That is for public however, in private he shows the side no one else will see. He is very happy you both will have a child soon and that his suscpicion was proven wrong and he can have a family with you.

He is also extremely terrrified, but won't show it. He is concerned he will be like his father and hurt them in ways that can’t be easily fixed. takes alot to assure him that he won't

You will catch him at night rubbing your stomach, when he thinks you are asleep, and just whispering promises to them about how they will be a better father than his. That he will be there for them and encourage growth rather than perfection.

When you start to show , expect your lap to be his new favorite place to be. He will find any excuse to wrap his arms around your middle and protect that little growing life inside.

When alone he will press his face against your stomach to feel them, and hopefully hear them.(modern aus he definitely got one of those little portable baby heart rate monitors so he can listen).

You will want or need for NOTHING. Whatever it is he will get it, or make someone get it. And only the best care for the mother of his child.

When the day comes for the child to be born he will be a bit in edge. Anything could go wrong, his mother is proof of that. So he's gonna be nervous

Won't stop him being there to see the child entering the world( you are thankful for the inhuman strength and pain threshold during labor as you had him in a death grip). He will make sure he's one of the first faces that baby sees.

He was in awe hearing his child let out their first cry. After so many months they were finally here. It was hard to believe for him.

The moment his child was placed in his arm, it all clicked into place for him. This was HIS child. His family and he may now start to understand love a bit more ( you helped with the romantic aspect of it but this baby brought home the familial kind).

He'd die and kill for this baby.

He'd be happy with any gender but God forbid it was a daughter

He'd immediately become an absolute DEMON to protect her. If you are not on his short list of people allowed to even breathe around her you will die.

He wonders if it's too early to think about convents ( yes you shut that down quick) or if the castle needs to be made more secure.

Other than that he is very active in their care and upbringing. He doesn't want to miss anything. He doesn't want to be absent like his father and only there when it benefits him.

You have caught him just in the nursery, sitting there maybe even doing work while doing so, talking to the baby, or just holding them. It warms your heart.

He suggested the name Angel, boy or girl, because they are the little angel that gave his life a new purpose to work towards.

He's a very involved dad and is encouraging of what his child is learning. Doing his best not to force perfection or failure mindsets on the child. It messed him and his brothers up. He won't let it happen to them.He wants them to learn and grow even if there is mistakes. Learn from them.

After a few years he is definitely going to approach you about another.

"My dear, what are your thoughts about us having another little one to accompany our angel?"

Niji

Same like his brother he thought they were infertile due to the modifications.

When you told him he thought you were messing with him to get out of some 'alone time'.

When you presented the test/ultrasound to him then it started to process for him.

Honestly doesn't know how to think about the situation. He's not upset about it but he isn't doing back flips about it. It happened, this is bound to happen with how much he can't keep his hands off of you.

Once he sees the duress on your face though, after telling him and not getting any kind of reaction, he assured that he wasn't upset and will take time to process for him.

Time it did take. It took months for him to really grasp what was going on. When he finally heard their heartbeats (yes plural that day he learned it was twins) and saw them on the sonogram it sunk in; this was real.

Like Ichiji nothing but the best in food and care for you, especially food. The mother of his children will not be eating trash! Only the best because his kids deserve the best.

Acknowledges he isn't the best or kindest man( look what he's done to Sanji and others). But he promises to do better for their sakes.

He is fiercely protective, won't really tolerate anyone looking at your pregnant self without permission if he had his way. If you both are somewhere together he will place you in his lap and wrap his arms around your middle while glaring at others.

When they are finally born is when it finally fully cements this is real. Seeing their sleeping faces in their cots, blue hair secure under a warm little beanie, made him finally accept.."yep I'm a father now."

He affectionately calls his twins his little blueberries as they inherited his hair color

He,like Ichiji, is a damn demon when it comes to protecting them. If you aren't even on the breathing list to be near them, you will lose the right to breathe.

He regularly changes his voice to entertain them.

He sneaks them sweets when they are older.

Dad and twins become a chaos team once they can walk.

He really wants them to hurry up and grow he wants to show them and teach them so many things.

When they are a bit older he will also approach for more.

"Darling, what do you think of adding a few more blueberries to the bunch?"

Yonji

If it wasn't the genetic modifications he'd probably think he couldn't have kids due to all the physical trauma his body has gone through on missions. Probably left some damage to that department in his mind.

He stared at you bug eyed for a bit when you told him. Mouth hung open to.

Shook it off fast though and immediately started asking if you were sure. That it wasn't a mistake ( at home tests can be wrong at times after all!).

He went with you to the doctor to confirm the test and see the little sea monkey growing inside you, and that moment everything for him changed.

He's actually excited. Have a mini you or him running around soon? Sounds like absolute fun!

He's also terrified as well. He's terrified the child won't like him.

He also knows people are naturally afraid of him for being the biggest and the strongest of his brothers. He is absolutely terrified of the idea of his own child being afraid of him, like Sanji was afraid of him and judge. it would absolutely break his heart he worked so hard to build.

As soon as it's confirmed about your condition he WILL NOT leave you alone. He's going to be acting as a bodyguard of sorts. No one but doctors, and those he deems safe, will be allowed near you.

He's going to be helping with everything including the nursery. He doesn't trust anyone but you two doing it.

That thing where husbands hold up their pregnant partners stomach to ease the pressure? Yeah he does that a lot for you. He feels bad he can't always do it, but walking would be awkward and he has work.

He makes it up by doing it in bed. Places a pillow on his prosthetic arm so it won't jab you, let's you lie on it then immediately puts his hands on your belly to lift it while spooning to help you sleep.

You will be tucked in close to him, wasn't kidding when saying he was protective.

He also likes to rest his head on your stomach and talk to the baby. And he'll talk about anything with them.(his eyes absolutely light up in excitement when they kick back in response).

You have, silently, woken up to him with his face pressed close to your stomach and holding you. Sounding like he was pleading to the baby 'please don't hate me.'

When the baby is born he is absolutely BLOWN away with how tiny they are in his arms. They look so fragile and innocent in his arms.

He is going to protect them. From the evil that infected him. No matter what.

He, when he thought no one was looking ( you were awake but pretended to be asleep to watch them bond), broke down in tears when he made eye contact with his baby and they immediately made grabby hands for him and happy coos. His baby wasn't afraid, they loved him.

Super involved dad. He wants to be there for everything and have the kid with him at all times. It's not an uncommon sight to see him with the baby strapped to him in the castle as he does non dangerous work.

Fun dad. He's always playing with them and making a silly face at them to keep them entertained or doing something weird to make them squeal in delight (that's his favorite noise). He is addicted to his baby's smile.

His brothers are demons when protecting their kids. He's a straight up MONSTER. If you make that baby so much as quiver their lip in duress, or look at them without permission, he's going to make sure that mistake doesn't happen twice.

Active dad in the exercise sense. He'd do his workouts with the baby nearby, but safely away from heavy equipment, to the point they wanna join dad.

Yes he does those little baby exercises to work out the legs for baby too. Get the kid started young for a healthy life!

He also participates in 'baby workouts '. If the baby is on their back kicking their feet, HES on his back kicking his feet. If the baby is wiggling from side to side trying to roll then he's gonna do it too. If the baby is on their stomach lifting themselves up by pushing up on their little arms then yonji is doing it too and if the baby flops he flops too. He will even do his push ups in time with the baby trying to push themselves off the floor.

His kid is an overachiever. They want to crawl and roll as soon as possible to follow dad around, and he LOVES IT. Makes him so proud and he's their biggest cheerleader.

If the kid didn't learn to crawl before walking they were definitely a butt scooter, and he loved that too and always made sure to compliment their kid as they got better at bouncing along on their butt "whoa! Good job on that bounce little buddy! You got some serious air on that one!"

He wants more as soon as you are able and willing. He loves this one so much he's sure he can spread it to more kids.

" what do you say sweetheart? Wanna make a giant green family with me?"

The thought all three of them share: Absolutely, under any circumstances, DO NOT let judge anywhere near their partners or babies. They were fucked up enough thanks to him. They won't let him do the same to their kids. Reiju is fine though and if Sanji WANTS to, he can come around and visit his nieces and nephews.

Woooooo I finally finished these. I hope you all enjoyed these as much as I did making them. Probably going to make a part 2 for more nsfw hcs in regards to this. Again, thank you @moonlit-mystery-writer for feeding my mind on this matter and sharing your hcs and thoughts. It got me through. Now more people can experience vinsmoke love.

Y'all have a good one and see ya next time!

[jackhues]

omg the boys and jim’s speeches to mama 🫠 everyone’s crying HARD

going to outline the speeches bcz i don't have the brain energy to acc make all the speeches loll

quinn: "welcome everyone, idk how many of you know me here, but i'm quinn, mama's first child. growing up, all of my friends would ask their parents if they could stay over... i would ask mama. she's been my best friend for as long as i could remember. after everything she's done for us growing up - everything she sacrificed, i've only wanted the best for her, nothing less. i can confidently say, mat that's you. you're the best for her."

jack: "welcome everyone, you all already know me, jack hughes, superstar hockey player - ow! let me finish! - and even an all-star. but my favourite title is mama's little brother. her favourite sibling some may say" (someone: probably luke: "no one says that") "mama's been there for me forever. back when we were all playing hockey as kids on the pond, one thing that i can never forget is when mama would always 'draft' me first if she had the first pick. the day new jersey drafted me, mama hugged me and said "i've always known it". unlike quinn, i don't think mat's an angel or perfect or anything, but he makes mama the happiest i've ever seen her. and he's a good dad to p. if anyone's gonna marry mama, i guess you're the best choice."

luke: "growing up, i think mama babied me more than my actual mom did. she was the one who used to pack my lunches and snack and make sure i was dressed and ready to go for every game. when jack and quinn got drafted, when i went to university, i was calling her every second of the day, because i just hated being without her. i can't imagine life without her, and now that mat's here, i can't imagine mama without him."

jim: "there are two times in my life when i sobbed. the first was when mama was born, and the second was when my little peanut was born. as soon as i held mama in my arms, the little baby who couldn't even open her eyes yet, i fell in love. i've spent about twenty-nine years trying to be the best for all of my babies - for mama especially. and i'm so so proud of her, of everything she's done, of everything she is. and i'm proud to be able to call mat my son-in-law."

[pedropascalfanfic65]

How is your pain, my love? —> Chapter 1. The Birth.

———

Excitement and anxiety filled Pedro and his wife Charlotte’s bedroom. She lay on the bed, her rounded belly a sign that the long-awaited moment had finally arrived. Contractions came in waves, and she squeezed Pedro’s hand with each peak of pain.

Charlotte: “Pedro, I think it’s time. The contractions are becoming more regular. Let’s call the hospital.”

Pedro: “Alright, I’ll call them right away.”

Pedro dialed the hospital’s number while Charlotte took deep breaths to manage the pain.

As they arrived at the hospital, the excitement and nervousness were palpable. They were directed to a delivery room where the medical staff was waiting.

Nurse: “Hello, how’s it going? Are you ready to meet your little baby?”

Charlotte: “Yes, I’m ready. But I’m a bit apprehensive about the pain.”

Pedro took his wife’s hand and smiled at her.

Pedro: “You’re amazing, you can do this. I’ll be here for you every step of the way.”

The labor began, and Charlotte endured the pain with courage. Pedro was by her side throughout the process, holding her hand, encouraging her, and comforting her.

Nurse: “We’re almost ready for the birth. Both of you are incredible.”

Finally, the long-awaited moment arrived. The baby made its appearance, cries filled the room, and the magical moment of birth was celebrated with tears of joy.

Nurse: “Congratulations, it’s a beautiful baby! It’s a baby boy!”

Pedro hesitated, his face betraying his fear as he looked at the crying newborn. He didn’t take the baby into his arms, feeling the overwhelming weight of his own insecurity.

Charlotte: “Pedro, look at our son. He’s perfect.”

Pedro observed the baby with teary eyes, battling his own inner demons.

The baby, now resting on his mother’s chest, filled the delivery room with his cries. Pedro and Charlotte looked at each other with a mixture of exhaustion and happiness; they had already chosen their son’s name before his birth.

Nurse: “Congratulations! It’s a beautiful baby!”

Charlotte took Pedro’s hand, and one of the midwives asked gently:

Nurse : “Do we have a name for this little angel? We need to write it on his bracelet.”

Charlotte smiled at Pedro, then replied to the midwife:

Charlotte: “Our son will be named Diego.”

Pedro, although somewhat disconnected by the baby’s birth, approved of Charlotte’s choice by kissing her on the forehead.

The midwives carefully wrote the name on the baby’s bracelet and placed it on his wrist, marking his entry into the world.

The midwife gently took the newborn in her arms.

Midwife: “We’ll take the baby for some examinations and a bath. Don’t worry; everything will be fine.”

The three midwives left the room with the baby, leaving Pedro and Charlotte alone.

Charlotte: “Look at him; he’s so adorable. We have a baby boy, my love.”

Pedro smiled at his wife, but a shadow of concern crossed his face.

Pedro: “Yes, he’s beautiful.”

Charlotte: “Pedro, the nurses and doctors will take good care of him.”

Pedro nodded but remained anxious.

Meanwhile, in the adjacent room, the three midwives had malicious intentions. They discreetly took out their phones and took photos of the newborn without Pedro and his wife’s consent.

Malicious Midwife: “Look at this, Pedro Pascal’s child. We’ll make a fortune if we sell these photos to the tabloids.”

The other midwives nodded with sly smiles.

Midwife: “Yes, we’re going to strike it rich with the birth of this baby.”

They then returned to the delivery room with the baby, hiding their malicious intentions behind professional smiles.

———-

I hope you like it! Feel free to give your feedback in the comments! Thanks You!!

[byfulcrums]

Seeing so many people putting Azula and Zuko against each other bothers me a lot, because that's literally what Ozai did. How can you guys not see that? It's canon

Azula and Zuko were both terrible to eachother in multiple occasions (edit: actually, Azula was terrible to Zuko, but I didn't wanna get jumped by Azula stans so I made it seem like they were both bad. Sorry about that and thanks for correcting me), but they're both traumatized children fighting a war that started before they were even born. The war made them that way. Ozai made them that way

Azula was horrible to Zuko for most of his life, and that's canon. You can't deny it. But at the same time, it MOSTLY wasn't her fault

So, we know how Ozai clearly liked Azula more than Zuko did. But why is this? Zuko may not be as good as Azula in terms of bending, but he's not a bad bender. Ozai likes Azula more (not loves; likes) because she acts the way he wants her to act. She's cold, mean, calculating, manipulative and supports the Fire Nation. Zuko is nice, he asks too many questions, struggles with his emotions and can't seem to stfu (I know I sound mean saying that but that's literally canon. That boy cannot, for the love of god, shut his fucking mouth up)

Ozai made Azula be more like him. Zuko gets his kindness from his mother

And on the topic of Ursa, she canonically loves both of her children, even if she prefers Zuko due to him being less like their abuser. We never see her calling Azula a monster, besides of the scene where she says “What is wrong with that child?” OUTSIDE OF HEARING RANGE and right after Azula did something Bad™ (forgot what it was sorry). This is why I believe that Ursa never directly told Azula she feared her: Ozai told her she did. Ozai spent a lot more time with Azula than he did with Zuko, which was very easily an opportunity to poison her mind even more. And how did he do this?

By telling her everyone hated her.

He isolated her, made her cold and unforgiving, so that she wouldn't have any “weaknesses” like Zuko did. He used her as a means to abuse Zuko. He told her Zuko and Ursa were weak and that they both feared and hated her

Zuko would be right to be angry at Azula for treating him the way she did,but he still should know (and he DOES know, it was literally the main theme of his redemption arc; realizing that his abuser was the one at fault and not him) that the one at fault was Ozai. Same with Azula; it wasn't Zuko's fault nor Ursa's, Ozai is the one that willingly chose to destroy so many people's lives because he wanted power

And I'm pretty sure Zuko and Azula don't hate eachother like many people believe them to do. No, they love eachother, but ofc Ozai fucking ruined their relationship bc he ruins EVERYTHING

Zuko is sad that their relationship turned out to be that way. Zuko wants them to be better, to do better. Zuko wants them to be happy. But Zuko has also grown up with a version of Azula that could never make mistakes and that was mean af. Zuko won't be able to have a perfectly healthy relationship with his sister ever because of how he was made to think of Azula as perfect, and because Azula was made to think of him as weak

So, please, don't pit them against eachother. Don't compare the abuse they went through (seriously. Doing that is disgusting). Don't bring one of them down to make the other look like a little angel that does nothing wrong. They already suffer because of that enough in canon. Leave my babies alone

[moonlightperseus]

911 Characters + dogs you think they should own

okay im sooo sorry it's taken me so long to reply to this but i wanted to really mull it over and i've been thinking about it a lot and i've come up with a basic list for the main chars (+ a few that are Main In My Heart) i've paired off the canon couples since they would be getting the dog together.

bobby (and athena, but i'm putting bobby specifically because athena is allergic to dogs and thus this is His dog) - Chinese crested dog (i originally was debating between bichon and toy poodle but then i saw the error of my ways) bobby rescues this older, a little bit in need of some tlc chinese crested and it's perfect because they're a pretty hypoallergenic breed (the hairless ones at least, which is what bobby rescues), athena is hesitant about the dog at first,

henren - golden retriever / mix, i know they had a smaller dog in the past but personally i think they should have a medium/large dog next, a rescue who is a little older (past puppyhood/young adult bc hooo boy you don’t need a puppy and a baby at the same time), idk if it’s a full golden or a mixed breed with some golden in it but it’s a very even tempered fluffy dog who’s a total sweetheart (if sometimes a little stubborn about moving… i’m not speaking from any person experience what are you talking about)

madney - staffy mix, okay i’m giving credit to maddie (@thebuckley-hans) for getting me on the madney getting a staffy agenda and also the wonderful staffy mix at my work who is an ANGEL. again they rescue a little older of a dog (bc i am NOT subjecting my blorbos to puppy & young child i’m not doing that!!!! getting a puppy when you have a baby is a trend that needs to die out imo <3 why would you subject yourself to that On Purpose)

bonus for madney - i also think they should get a boston terrier, maybe a little later when jee is a little more grown up, bc hooo boy bostons can be fucking wild but i have a soft spot for bostons and also THE madney ep... boston... yeah

eddie - english bulldog. this is based on approx nothing except for the fact that we had our bulldog regular, George, at work recently and i thought it would be funny if eddie somehow ended up with a bulldog and i’ve been stuck on this concept ever since

buck - irish wolfhound. this is absolutely me projecting my captivation on the breed that ive had for so long (my original want for him was a newfoundland, for uh, similar reasons, but i feel soooooo bad putting on in california) i just think he should have a Real Big Dog (as @scattered-winter has put it, a dog that could just lie on him and be like a weighted blanket)

ravi - okay i have two VERY different vibes for ravi that i cannot decide between. one is a border collie, theyre... very intense but i think he would go all in on the training, it might be a little challenging with his long shifts though, they dont do well with being left alone/boredom but he could have a pettsitter situation. now on the COMPLETE OPPOSITE END OF THE SPECTRUM, i could also see ravi with a little spoiled purse dog, i'm thinking lhasa apso? (am i biased bc one of my dogs is supposedly 20% lhasa, maybe) i think he would would dote on that dog sooo hard and spoil her and she have little spa days and maybe her and bobby's dogs are friends......

lucy - shetland sheepdog. i cannot explain it but i got it in my head of her having sheltie(s) and its stuck like glue. she just has the Sheltie Person Vibe I CANT EXPLAIN IT

may - mixed breed as a bonus i think may should have a scruffy lil mixed breed, not small small but like medium small. just a scrungley guy (maybe a cairn terrier mix?)

okay yeah!! i think this is it!! apologies again for the long ass ramble and the delayed response but i thought about this a lot and im just!!! thank you for this ask!!!

[yourflowersfirst]

day 1,421

pages 256-258

filled with pain and unwanted resentment. i wish to be made of love but i’m not; i am the pieces of a child held together by regret, rage, and trusting in an older man- all begging to fall apart. i always think of you before i fall asleep. the words you said, the way you looked, the things we laughed about, the silent moments we shared. when i dream, i always try to make sure it’s of you. it’s always about you. loving you is breathing to me. easy rise and fall of my chest.

you are the knife i turn inside of myself, is this love?

and i thought, so suddenly it jolted me, “he’s so pretty i could cry,” i clutched my ribs, my heart, anything to calm the ache and storm gathering in me. “pretty boy, with pretty hair and pretty eyes. he’s mine, all mine.”

he wants nothing to do with me.

⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅

"the lord knows that even the lowliest amongst us can be worthy of mercy," father jeff was stoic. "but once the devil has his claws in, the fires of hell take over. there is no saving someone beyond it. temptation is one of these things that can lure someone over the threshold. once your soul is engulfed, praying for 1000 years could not save you."

i chewed at my nails. my little sister was looking at her kids' bible, young enough to get away with not paying attention. i zoned out and thought about what father jeff said, how he seemed to be staring straight at me. during communion, my hands trembled, and i almost dropped the eucharist. the organist looked at me quizzically.

after service, once home, i had a fried bologna sandwich for lunch my mom made. i ate half and chewed and spit the other half. i excused myself and went to hide alone in the woods by my house, still wearing my long skirt and saddle shoes from mass. i yanked my hair out of the braid in annoyance, tangled but unbothered by the knots as i trotted to the ginormous oak trees and rushing dirty creek.

my mother just sighed and kept folding laundry as i left, shouting to be back in an hour to do algebra I homework. i barely had a C, she reminded me, not gently. ("high school is going to be terrible for you if you keep behaving like this.") i laid in the tall spring grass on my back and tried texting him on my blue slide phone- a pantech laser 2012 that couldn't download apps, but could play non copyrighted music and text my boyfriend.

i tried sending him a few messages, but it was the middle of the day; he'd likely be at work. though, to my shock, he texted back quickly.

"sneaking on my phone to text u. don't tell my boss ;)"

i snorted and laid my arm over my eyes to fight off the sun. "our secret. miss your voice though."

"i wanna see u so bad," he replied, ignoring me. "ur an angel. the prettiest girl i've ever seen."

i snapped a quick selfie to send (which would take forever on this phone, of course). i hesitated, despising my glasses, braces, spattering of freckles. i always thought my freckles looked like the blood spatter at a crime scene. i sent it anyway, and he gushed over my appearance. "you're beautiful, so sexy, i am so in love with you, perfect darling baby." it felt like a trap. i felt like a caged animal.

"i wanna make u feel good," he replied. "would do anything to go down on u..."

"i wanna meet you irl already, feel ur skin on mine," he sent through after i ignored his other messages, the ones that made bile creep up my throat. a caterpillar crawled up my leg in solidarity. "lets meet at a park in upper arlington. i'm off work wednesday, we could hang at likeee 2?"

i gnawed at my lower lip, free hand fiddling with the dandelions shedding their yellow coats. "i'm in school till 3. plus i can't drive, and if you pick me up my mom will freak LOL." meeting him in person, in truth, frightened me. my blood was running cold and turning pale in my veins.

"have ur mom drop u off, just tell her ur meeting a friend," the solution came too easily to him. "i wanna kiss u!!!!"

my brain was numb as i typed out, "okay."

3 days later, we were at a park 15 minutes from my house. i just wanted to hold his hand, that's all. nothing impure. my mom, sister, krystal, and i all got out of the minivan. as we walked around the park, i saw him. i felt like a deer about to get run over. he sauntered over to me, though, not seeing my mom hobbling behind me. my sister and krystal were running right to the swings, oblivious to the shitstorm about to happen. i trotted ahead, just barely out of eyesight. ignored by all. no one noticed the little girl approaching the man with a class ring on.

"wow, hi! you're gorgeous in person," he ran toward me and kissed my lips so fast i hardly noticed.

my first kiss.

we walked around the park quickly, until we settled under a huge pine tree that was throwing away its winter coat. early april was still chilly in ohio, but the sun was out just enough to tease warmer days.

i was wearing my nicest pair of earrings and most form fitting skinny jeans. we nestled under the tree, him wiggling his tongue into my mouth. anytime i tried to protest and pull away he snaked his hand to the back of my head, pulling my hair, pulling me back in. he smelled very nice, i thought. it's what i tried to focus on instead of the incessant need rising in him and the nausea rising in me.

in my peripheral vision, i saw someone walking over to the tree we were under. i tried to jump away, but it was too late.

she saw. she saw him, had she been catching up this whole time? frick frick frick. i jumped away from him, his dyed hair much more blue in person the more i looked at him. "oh, is this..." he trailed off, noticing my mother, her face turning 20 shades of crimson.

"who is this man?" my mom eventually pulled me away, her anger and grief palpable enough to taste. i deserved this. i waved goodbye to him sheepishly as i was hauled away. he just looked dumbstruck, then annoyed as he sauntered home in his pristine vans and my chemical romance tshirt. "girls! we're going home!" she howled at my sister and her best friend, 11 and 12 years old respectively.

"aww man, we weren't even here for 20 minutes."

"yeah, why'd you ruin all the fun?"

i didn't have an answer. my mother shoveled me into the van. "we'll talk once we're home, with your father."

"no, please don't tell him," i started crying and hyperventilating. my glasses fogged up pathetically. "please."

"sis, why're you crying so hard?"

"you have snot running from your nose. ew."

i wiped my face with my paramore hoodie.

once home, my parents sat me in my room, on the bed. i was preparing for the worst. him arrested, police cars everywhere, the news interviewing how i loved but lost him in the end. me watching from the sidelines, brave yet inconsolable. none of this was my fault, technically. right? how much victimhood are you willing to grant a girl like me, one who knew exactly what i was?

"you're grounded for a month," my mom started with no preamble. "and your phone and laptop privileges are gone except for school, with one of us watching."

i started crying again. "but i love him."

"no. shut up. i won't hear of this," my mom kept going. "you did this, you let him do all that crap i saw on your phone messages. you could have said no and deleted his number, or whatever. either way. no more skype, no more phone, no more minecraft, no more wizard101. i don't know how you met that man, but it ends now."

(author's note: my mom had no clue how to deal with this. i am sympathetic to her now. please don't treat her harshly, this is just what happened to me.)

my dad was silent as the dead. i wailed, "i'm sorry," over and over again.

"you're gonna be."

no police, he wasn't arrested. no one knew of my shame except them and me. and him, of course. my parents threw all the blame on my shoulders for me alone to carry. that night, in the bath, i scrubbed my skin so hard i bled a little. yet i never felt clean and never really would again. in a month, once i got my phone back, i texted him: "it's me. i'm so sorry." i still remembered his number, my love knowing no bounds. it still doesn't.

"whatever. u left me. i have a new gf now, anyway, and shes way hotter than u. have fun at ur marching band practices."

i threw my new phone across my room. it was dark, and i heard cicadas screeching at me. they were calling me a stupid infantile girl, and they were right. i wondered if my soul was still beyond saving. i said 10 hail marys, just in case it would help. god, i'm not these things i do. i'm gonna regret this forever. i sobbed over my gold cross rosary. it still hangs in my room to this day.

[dazzlegradual]

blood for a thimble

back in 2019/2020, I was a part of my city's 'vagina monologues.' I was in a special production where we could write our own material. and I decided to write about my general disdain for prescribed womanhood, my hatred of terfs for coopting something as beautiful as feminism, and how it felt to watch kids be scared of getting their first periods.

_________________________

Minimize your pores, shave your legs, smooth your calves, trim your thighs, flatten your tummy, cut your cuticles, iron your hair, gape your thighs, perfect your skin.

make your hair smoother, sleeker, straighter, like silk - like porcelain: like the quiet, dead, shiny, smiling, dead, perfect angel that you are, that you could be:

so light and smooth and pearly you would hardly even notice it’s there -- hardly notice I’m there. 

Take note of my uniform.

tattered, cropped shirts, jeans ripped perfectly on purpose, cascading, limp hair with bleached split ends on purpose, a ‘One Size Fits All’ label declared on a shirt best fit on a body I haven’t had since I was ten:

This is the oyster girls are offered.

we rise as Venus dripping in pink glitter and confident struts, and with the swelling of our womb, we are rewarded and shoved back into the sea.

impressioned with thinking the world was made for our smiles, only to learn they are not wanted from the pleasure of our digitorum and autonomy.

how dare we feel and not want to be felt.

I know that men noticed a fire raging on my tongue and in my limbs before I did: curling the ends of my mouth, carting me for consumption before I had the chance to rid myself of blood stained underwear.

my womanhood suddenly a nuisance, an annoyance, a marker of growing up, I guess. 

Not a right for consumption of my swelling body.

It is not expanding for you, it’s expanding for a child. 

Mind you, I was still a child. 

You’d think the world wants young girls to disappear.

And we do. Quietly. At night, before school, after sleepovers.

Becoming a woman slices us into a binary so slender, it suffocates us all.

Even the ones born with the ‘right’ chromosomes, who can even be a woman anymore?

But still, please, witness my attempts to finally be flat and small and quiet enough to blend in with my surrounding buildings. 

I promise you. I’ll do it all.

Only cry into vanity mirrors, or the floor of my closet, or the dressing rooms of shopping malls.

I promise you: my suffering will be silent and private and you will never watch the painstaking process of me attempting to shrink into my skin.

No, you, you only see a smile sweet and small and pretty and beautiful.

I still know this smile -- this small, sweet smile -- all too well, no longer in myself, but in the girls I work with. 

Working at summer camps, I bear witness to many girls having their first period.

There is always fear in her eyes when she rustles mine or another’s sleeping bag awake in the middle of the night because she is afraid of her own body.

The fear always bothers me the most.

I wonder if she is aware of how men will treat her differently, as if the blood a foreshadowing -- drafting her into ranks which biology and cisnormativity guaranteed her. 

A period means that you can have a baby. It doesn’t even mean that you are a woman.

And when I got mine, the only thing people seem to care about is that it made me boobs two cup sizes bigger -- which felt like the only place I was allowed to grow. 

I was built, apparently, to fertilize the world, but instead I want to watch it burn. 

In the ashes, I want to plant seeds of thought into the minds of young girls who are told they are the most beautiful when they take up the least space.

I bleed not for you, but for those girls. 

you are not your anatomy. it means as much or as little as you want it to.

And I for one will not eliminate young girls, trans girls, trans boys - all children, beautiful children -- from what I contrive of my own body.

We are so much more than our ability to breed future oppressors, and I don’t want to equate my woman-ness with my ability to bleed. 

I am not scared of being a woman.

I am angry at a world that made me feel small for being one.

I was born to take up space, not just to bear your fucking children.