#so this was the gold film prequel.... i see i thought it was the other way around

[hauntingblue]

You guys think the one piece movies are on letterboxd?

[thenightling]

Willy Wonka misconceptions

As Charlie and the Chocolate Factory / Willy Wonka has become weirdly popular lately because of the successful prequel film and most recently that really botched / rip-off Wonka event in Glasgow Scotland, it felt like a good time for this post.

Here are a list of popular misconceptions about the book and films.

1. Much of the Internet thinks of Wonka as a "Serial killer of children." I pointed out that at the end of the 2006 film and novel you see the children alive, though altered. And in the 1971 film that version of Wonka says that they will all be fine, but a little wiser. Someone tried to argue with me that he was just trying to placate Charlie. Really!? Since when did that Wonka ever lie to make people feel better?

Based on his previous behavior we have no reason to believe Wonka would lie just to make Charlie feel better. It's just a dark, edgy, annoying headcanon to pretend Wonka killed those other kids when every version tells you they survived.

____________________________

2. Grandpa Joe was not "Faking it" or "being lazy." It seems ironic to me that so many rant and even get genuinely angry about the character Grandpa Joe. It is especially odd to me when the rage is in regard to the depiction in the 1971 film, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory.

The reason it is odd to me is because in the 1971 film Grandpa Joe very clearly was suffering through severe depression, possibly a long bipolar depression phase.

The depression is clear in his "I've got a golden Ticket" song.

"I never thought my life could be Anything but catastrophe"

"I never had a chance to shine Never a happy song to sing"

It seems weird to me that today people shame characters like Cinderella for not being assertive and empowered when she's a live-long abuse victim. And then you have the people against Disney's The Little Mermaid who say she gave up who and what she is for a man but ignore that she had a song number from before she ever saw Eric, where she expressed body dysphoria and made clear she wanted to be human even then.

And you have a large part of the Internet shaming Grampa Joe for being "lazy" and "faking being sick' while he's literally telling us that he he's been in a severe depression.

It's almost like watching a generation that supposedly respects mental illness and understands depression in ways previous generations didn't... suddenly having a justification to shame someone for having all the symptoms of clinical depression.

Hell, even the song "I've got a Golden Ticket" kind of indicates Grandpa Joe is entering a manic phase. If Grandpa Joe's illness is psychological why do we treat it as not-real? I get so annoyed at how many people mock the character or act like he's a con artist exploiting Charlie.

________________________

3. The Oompa Loompas were not slaves.

It's true that the earliest depictions of the Oompa Loompas were little African people (before the novel was revised) but in all versions he tells the kids that he pays them in coca-beans. That might sound like he pays them in fallen acorns he found in his garden but it's made clear that to Oompa Loompas, in their society, coca-beans are worth more than gold.

Try to imagine you got a job working for aliens who offer to pay you in large bars of gold if you just help him make some gold jewelry. But because gold isn't worth THAT much to these aliens they think you're a pathetic slave, even though Lofty (the Oompa Loompa from the new Wonka movie) probably now has a palace on Loompa Land that he uses as a summer house.

Interesting bit of trivia: Charlie was originally going to be black.

___________________________

4. Wonka (2023) is NOT a remake. A lot of people mistakenly think this is yet another remake. No. It's a musical prequel to the Gene Wilder Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory movie from 1971. ________________________

5. Lots of fans have "figured out" that the shoe shine boy Wonka sees early in Wonka is Charlie. One small problem with that. This is twenty-something Willy Wonka. Wonka was supposed to be pushing fifty or sixty when he went looking for an heir. The timeline wouldn't work. The director has confirmed that for this reason the shoe shine boy is NOT Charlie Bucket.

And there you go. A list of popular Wonka misconceptions debunked.

[mysticaltora8276]

Now you would probably see my post and think that I hate Star Wars legends with a passion. As a matter of fact, the prequel is actually got me into Star Wars legends. Its just that Star Wars legends as a whole is a mixed bag. The ones that happened before Star Wars the Phantom Menace are to be frank weird. Just weird and if that’s your thing, then have it, but I thought that it was a little ridiculous. It was basically like the original trilogy only with more anachronistic technology and it just felt a little odd. Now there were some concepts that were good ideas but as a whole it just kind of felt odd. That said there were some storylines that I actually thought particularly interesting. And some of the characters were pretty neat as well.

During the Phantom Menace was actually pretty interesting because they started to dive into the nitty-gritty and they actually was interesting. Well except for Plagueus. However, this is where the vilification of the Jedi started up. Authors either had no clue or just blatantly decided to insert their own opinions in here. As a result, the Jedi came across as less of an order of people, fully accepting of other cultures and compassionate, and more of a strict dogmatic order that had little tolerance for anything that did not fit into their “mold“. Which if you’ve seen the movies and the TV show which at the time were considered the highest form of Canon and pretty much the backbone in DNA of Star Wars just didn’t fit at all. This is where what Lucas films is doing now makes sense. They’ve kind of course corrected on the view, particularly in the prequel that the Jedi were somehow this dogmatic and stiff order. Quite the contrary, it shows that they are very flexible, kind and compassionate.

During the empire, it could get pretty good to pretty weird to pretty mediocre. That was my experience with Legends like for example shadows of the empire was really good. The rest? Again it varied from mediocre to just bland or bad. Death troopers, for example, was nothing more than a zombie apocalypse of Star Wars and really at that point it just felt so bottom of the barrel, scraping not to mention the fact that two canon characters spoilers for anyone who doesn’t know are just inadvertently shoved in there and they do really next to nothing and don’t contribute to the plot at all, except for feeling like a gratuitous cameo and a desperatel try to tie it in the main universe. And don’t even get me started on the force awakens. If you want an overpowered protagonist that inexplicably manages to beat the chosen one not once but three times then I guess have added but personally I just thought it was ridiculous. It works as a video game, but When you come into the fact that they had to make a novelization tone all the crap down it just feels in disingenuous and like they were trying to have their cake and eat it too. Either be a crazy power trip that has no continuity in the Star Wars universe or just don’t make an over-the-top game that literally is nothing but a power fantasy.

After the Empire fell, that’s were the complete and utter mess began. Most of the authors at the time only had the original trilogy to go off of when it came to exploring the Jedi and empire and as a result, it just got wildly contradictory and just weird. This was worsened when the prequels came out and threw everything that they had said into the airlock for the most part. Legends at the time up till it got rebooted, was always a secondary and separate universe from George Lucas. He made it abundantly clear that legends was nothing more than a toy box that you could occasionally pluck an idea from and repurpose to fit his vision. Something that quite a few Legends lovers really didn’t grasp or refused to grasp.

Again, there were some gems like pretty much the heir of the empire series. That honestly, I hold as a gold standard because it felt like a legitimate continuation of the movies it took with the movies had expanded upon it, while the rest didn’t feel like that. It was trying to trudge on the original vision. It felt like somebody took Star Wars and put his own spin on it, while remembering the fact that at the end of the day, the characters that he was portraying were not his own, especially with the heroes which he utilized very well and took all of their individual strengths and managed to make them unique and stand out. His second foyer into it, which was pretty much the capping of a certain publishing era managed to fix a lot of the weirdness in the problems and make it semi coherent, which is a testament of how much he understood the source material and how much he knew that a lot of the crap that went on was just not in keeping with the vision that George Lucas had. What I’m saying is that Timothy Zahn was a very good writer who understood what kind of playground he was playing in and managed to expand upon what he was given all the wild staying true to the core of what it was.

Then came new Jedi order. And people complain about how the sequels you know are affected by “current politics.“ Excuse me? When I read a new Jedi order, I could even even at a time when I was young teenager I could see how the war on terror at the time, greatly impact it about how they wrote certain things it was blatantly obvious like if you lived during that era or even study that era you would definitely see parallels in there. Another thing that was a problem with the series that kind of burned me out from reading anything after the return of the Jedi part. It was the complete and utter nihilistic tone that the series took. They were trying to make it “dark and edgy“ when it just felt like they gutted the Heart and Soul of Star Wars Star Wars at its core is a hopeful story and yes, while I can get dark it ultimately felt hopeful because there was always hope. In new Jedi order there is no hope. It feels leak and nihilistic. Also, and introduces one of my least favorite characters aside from the republic commando characters. Enter Vergera. I don’t know why but something about this character just rubbed me the wrong way. I just couldn’t stand her. Not her deus ex Machina tears that completely destroyed a very unique storyline about someone dealing with more or less a chronic illness while being pregnant, which could’ve been interesting, but instead was halted off by a deus ex machina and then cured by a deus ex machina. And that’s another thing that new Jedi order struggled with. Stakes. The steaks were either ridiculously high or ridiculously noncommittal in some cases yes there were some stakes that did pay off, but in hindsight it feels like that they just purposely jacked it up to 11 and see tried to see what would happen. New Jedi order was a mess of being influenced by the politics, trying to make it as greedy as possible, and basically throwing things at the wall and hoping that they stuck.

The dark nest trilogy, and by that time I was completely burned out. Again, the night, holistic tone carried forward, and it just didn’t feel like Star Wars anymore. It felt like a well husk of what it used to be then came to legacy of the Force. To coin a phrase from the Internet “thanks. I hate it.“ It literally was the plot of the prequel’s only worse. Take all of the problems of the prequel and magnify them by 1 million times and then you’ve got legacy of the Force for me. Stupid characters making stupid decisions, canon characters being perfectly fine with fascism when previously they fought again said fascism. Karen Traviss coming in and ruining characters, particularly female characters, cause she can’t stand the idea of female characters that actually have agency and agenda. Oh and a beloved fan favorite character ends up sexually assaulting Ben Skywalker. And it is never brought up again or treated with the proper amount of respect and seriousness. Seriously it’s just brought up for a shock factor and that’s about it and it is disgusting.

And then we have. Jacen…. take Ben solo from the sequels and give them a less of a motive to fall to the dark side, along with a massive sense of self righteousness, and entitlement and then you got probably the character that rubbed me the wrong the worst possible way. In the previous series, new Jedi order he had first decided to take the “moral principal stance. To sit out on a war that it already started, and was already proving to be detrimental to the galaxy until his mom was nearly killed in front of him. This is supposed to be the moral person and all I could think of was, he sounded like one of those fake justice warriors who are fine with talking a big game, but when it actually comes to implementing things that would make things better they suddenly get cold feet and whine to mommy and daddy. In Legacy of the force he falls to the dark side for the dumbest reason. that’s getting into the fact that in the previous series dark nest he mind rapes his cousin. Yes really.

So like I said legacy of the course it’s just bad. It’s pretty bad then comes Fate of the Jedi. That’s another case of. “thanks wait no thanks and I hate it with a burning passion“ all of the dark elements in the crap that went on from legacy of the Force? Turned up to 11 and just it’s disgusting. With a very tempted ending with the three main characters from the original trilogy going out on an adventure when they’re in their 60s. There’s no sense of passing on the torch or anything. It just feels like that they will continue to hog the spotlight, particularly Luke Skywalker.

Then came Star Wars legacy. Which again is just the original trilogy only with more grim elements and a main character you want to punch. He is the classic 90s anti-hero and he is so insufferably annoying. I’m noticing a pattern of self righteous characters who whine about their daddy issues and do absolutely nothing to correctly issue. In fact, said character actually contributes to the worst of the issues and turns one of his fellow Jedi because at the time guess what? The Jedi are once again hunted and main character who we are supposed to sympathize with helps the newly form empire capture a Jedi and essentially is guilty of his murder and this is never really brought up again. The character is supposed to be a scoundrel or I should say a jerk, but the thing of it is is that even at the end of the narrative he never truly outgrow it. And he really doesn’t seem to learn much. I mean he felt vaguely guilty….then proceeds to bad stuff still. And you wanna talk about Force powers that completely break the story and make no damn sense? Nah Rey Skywalker isn’t a problem. Cade Skywalker is a problem. He literally has a portion of the story where it’s said that the Dark Side can’t tempt him….I’m sorry what? When did he because of literally perfect being? Also his bringing back people to life is just wrong. He gets to use it with no consequences despite the fact that he’s bending the Force and disregarding its will.

Another problem, I ended up having with Legends. Abilities in the Force that feel completely overpowered and just totally break any sort of tension or drama. It literally feels like at certain points that all they have to do is wave their hand and everything is easy for them. In fact, Timothy Zahn brings it up and actually comes up with a fairly unique way of solving it, but of course that’s completely ignored and they go right back into power mode.

As I’ve said before, the sequels have their problems, but at the very least, they feel like that they are trying to move forward and pass the torch forward instead of constantly circling and coming back to the same thing. So in conclusion, Star Wars legends for me is a mixed bag. You have really good to mediocre to bland to awful. There’s something I guess for everyone, but at the end of the day after I’ve read new Jedi order, darkness, and legacy of the force…. The summary of the general apathy and annoyance with it. So as you can imagine when Lucas film said that they were just gonna restart it and then just make it part of the same continuity instead of the stupid tiered system and make it more consistent with the movies and the TV shows at the time. I can honestly say that aside a few hiccups, they’ve been doing a pretty decent job.

[buffyfan145]

Really happy so far with what James Gunn and Peter Safran revealed of the first part of the new DCU slate!!! :D Chapter 1 is going to be called “Gods and Monsters”. Nice to see that this will have no affect on Matt Reeves’ movies/shows, “Joker 2″, the 2nd “Constantine” films, if the CW keeps any of their DC shows for next season, and the other cartoon series as they’ll all be branded as “DC Elseworlds” from now on. They also said that “Superman and Lois” will be able to go on till at least 2025 when their movie comes out but it’s The CW’s decision and they could get a final season next season if this one isn’t written to work that way. Also they will be keeping some of the current actors after “The Flash” movie creates this new DCU with Gal Galdot’s Wonder Woman, Jason Momoa’s Aquaman, Zachary Levi’s Shazam, the “Blue Beetle” cast, Voila Davis’ Amanda Waller, and the entire “Peacemaker” cast all being confirmed to be a part of this new universe. They haven’t decided yet about Ezra Miller but I have a feeling they might just bring in Wally West as another Flash going by the new slate. So here’s my thoughts on the new movies/shows in order of how they’ll be released though “Peacemaker” season 2 is also now a part of it. The shows too will all be on HBO Max.

Creature Commandos (TV): This one is new to me as it’s a group of characters similar to the Universal Monsters that band together. It’ll be an animated show too but the actors who voice them will also play them in live action so that will be cool and it will fully connect to the other movies, shows, and games.

Waller (TV): This is the show James has been working on about Amanda Waller and it’ll include Viola Davis and fully connect to “Peacemaker”.

Superman Legacy (movie): This was the Superman movie already revealed with a new actor to be cast and we know he’ll be in his 20s and trying to live his life as a journalist and as Superman. It’s been dated now for July 2025.

Lanterns (TV): This is a new version of the “Green Lantern” show that was originally in the works from Greg Berlanti but is now being fully by Gunn and Safran. Very cool that Hal Jordan and John Stewart are going to be the leads of the first season though others will appear.

The Authority (movie): This is another I don’t know that much about but it sounds cool. I do recognize a few characters the mentioned from the comics and having appeared on shows like “Stargirl” and “Legends of Tomorrow”.

Paradise Lost (TV): This one sounds really cool as it’s a prequel about the Amazons before Diana was born. They even compared it to “Games to Thrones”. Sounds like it will still connect to Gal’s version too.

Batman & Robin: The Brave and the Bold (movie): This one got me excited as it’s another Batman movie but the Robin in this is his actual son Damian Wayne!!! :D They also confirmed the rest of the Batfamily will be in this too and starting their own movies connected of them. With Damian already here this means that Dick/Nightwing, Barbara/Batgirl/Oracle, and at least Jason/Red Hood should be around as well as Alfred. Possibly could include Tim/Red Robin, Stephanie/Spoiler, and Cassandra/Black Bat as James said these characters have been long neglected by the Batman films. Depends on what Reeves is doing too but I think they’ll be fine with Dick already as an adult here and if he’s a still a teen in Reeves’ movies/shows. They will be casting a new Bruce/Batman, so curious to find out who that will be. They also dated “The Batman 2″ for October 2025 too.

Booster Gold (TV): This has also been in the works for years and he too showed up on “Legends of Tomorrow” so it’s finally happening.

Supergirl: Woman of Tomorrow (movie): This will be cool to see too. Though not sure if Kara will still be played by Sasha Calle like in “The Flash” movie or if it’ll be a new actress as Sasha’s seems to be tied to Henry Cavill’s. They didn’t mention Sasha either as staying so might be another recast.

Swamp Thing (movie): This one has me so excited!!! :D I’ve loved Swamp Thing for years and that he’ll be in the movies again and tied to this new DCU. It’s going to be darker than the other movies and shows listed here and end the first chapter leading into the 2nd chapter.

Overall I’m really excited and glad they’re doing this more like Marvel now with such a larger plan and focusing on getting the scripts done first before they film. Also looking forward to finding out the castings as this is going to be a lot of actors.

[rinn-e]

All Star Wars novels [canon and EU] I read this year ranked:

I made it my New Year's resolution to read more this year and among the books I read were a lot of Star Wars ones, so I decided to rank them and tell you my thoughts :)

DISCLAIMER: This is just my personal opinon and it might change if I reread some of the books.

15. Cloak of Deception - James Luceno 5/10 [EU]

A prequel to The Phantom Menace, which I was excited to read because, hey, more Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon! Great? Sadly not. They’re hardly ever featured (at least Obi-Wan feels more like a cameo character) and I remember the book being dull and a slog to go through. It isn’t necessarily the worst one; to be fair, I read it in the beginning of the year and maybe my expectations were too high. It’s interesting because of the pre-TPM politics but there are no scenes that stand out imo.

14. Children of the Jedi - Barbara Hambly 6/10 [EU]

A book with older OT characters, set some years after ROTJ. Damn. I almost didn’t finish this one. It’s quite long and especially the beginning feels very slow. I really liked the writing style; it’s very descriptive. Also, the new characters were alright, but the mystery wasn’t set up very well imo and the pacing was off.

13. Splinter of the Mind’s Eye - Alan Dean Foster 6.5/10 [EU]

Ah, the infamous almost sequel to A New Hope, that also put Han and Chewbacca on the bus. Light reading, story was alright, if a bit childish at times. I placed it higher than the ones before because I was very much amused by the incest vibes between Luke and Leia (comedy gold!) - George hadn't decided that they were siblings yet. Interesting due to its age, making you glad A New Hope cashed in as much money as it did.

12. Dark Apprentice - Kevin J. Anderson 6.5/10 [EU]

The score’s probably tainted by the fact that its the second part in a triology I only read this part of. Whoops (in my defence, I bought most of these books second-hand). Features Jedi Master Luke and his students, which was the cool part. Sadly, there’s also a very underdeveloped villain in Daala and an overpowered, uninteresting weapon.

11. The Truce at Bakura - Kathy Tyers 6.5/10 [EU]

Or: the one with the reptilians. Didn’t really get warm with that idea, but this one human side character that had been stockholm-syndrom-ed by them was quite cool and I liked Luke, I think? I don’t remember much about it, but it was alright. There was a scene with Leia rejecting Vader as a father that stood out.

10. The Crystal Star - Vonda Mcintyre 7/10 [EU]

It’s more of a 6.5/10 read, to be fair, but I really liked Han’s role in this and Leia as a badass!mother was cool too. The children were annoying but fit their age. I also liked the mystery aspects and (unpopular opinion) glop of power Waru even though some of it doesn’t quite fit Star Wars.

9. The Phantom Menace - Terry Brooks 7/10 [EU/canon]

Don’t have to say much to this, do I? I will say that I still didn’t like Jar Jar's scenes but Anakin's added scenes were cool.

8. Attack of the Clones - R. A. Salvatore 7/10 [EU/canon]

Same thing. I like both films; these prequel novels don’t really add anything that the films don’t already have. I do like the scenes with Padmé’s family that were deleted but kept here.

7. The Courtship of Princess Leia - Dave Wolverton 7/10 [EU]

Another unpopular opinion. I quite liked this one (apart from the whole premise with Han being a douche and the male gaze on the witches). It was really cool to see what Dathomir (Maul’s homeplanet) had been like when first introduced. Also, Luke’s connection to the Force was beautifully written.

6. Thrawn - Timothy Zahn 7/10 [canon]

I admit I’m not as enthusiastic about this book than others. Thrawn is an interesting character, no question. Eli is adorable and I will protect him at all costs (his dynamic with Thrawn really made this book), but it did feel quite stale at times. I also felt like the writing style could have used some more emotions, but that’s probably just me.

5. Ahsoka - E.K. Johnson 7,5/10 [canon]

Love Ahsoka, so this was a must read. I really like the small snippets between the main story and the writing style was nice, nothing too fancy. Some of the plot I liked (the side characters were cool too) but it didn’t feel like one big story, rather multiple ones glued together. In the end, it was a bit of a let down, but still an enjoyable read.

4. Jedi Apprentice series by Jude Watson (and briefly Dave Wolverton) 7,5/10 [EU]

I had a lot of fun with these 20 books about Obi-Wan's Padawan time. His dynamic with Qui-Gon is great and I loved going through all the ups and downs in their relationship with them. Admittedly, the target audience being children, the books are short and the writing style as well as the plot suffers from that, but I don’t care. Don’t ask me how much money I spent on these books :')

3. Catalyst -James Luceno 8/10 [canon]

Another book by James Luceno! And I really liked it this time! It’s a prequel to Rogue One. The dynamic between Galen, Orso and Lyra was AWESOME. Galen is too good for this world; this book made me want to write so many fics about him.

2. Master & Apprentice - Claudia Gray 9/10 [canon]

A book with Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, also featuring flashbacks with Dooku – What's not to love? I really enjoyed the writing style and the side characters; all in all, it's just a really good book. The cover is gorgeous. Only the villain and their ending felt a bit on the nose and it wasn’t explained too well. But that was a minor flaw imo.

1. Revenge of the Sith - Matthew Stover 9,5/10 [EU/canon]

MY BELOVED. I’m such a big ROTS fan and this book even manages to surpass the film at times (especially for a Obi-Wan & Anakin fan). The writing style is lovely and so quotable. I read it twice this year, it’s just that good. Go read it if you haven’t already ;)

[this-user-loves-thomas-thorne]

The Ghosts watching Star Wars

Okay so I’m a massive Star Wars fan so I thought I’d do a headcanon on the ghosts if they watched the original Star Wars trilogy (ep 4-6) - enjoy!

This would defo be one of Pat’s fave movie franchises ofc (he died a year after Return of the Jedi was first brought out in cinemas so he’d have watched all three of the original trilogy films) and he’d get so excited about watching it

He and the Captain would absolutely LOVE watching it together like it’s probably one of their fave movie franchises to binge watch together

He’d say all the time that the Captain is like Han Solo and that he’s like Chewbacca - Julian is defo Lando btw

Julian would probably be a bitch about it (as usual) and try and ruin it by telling them about the prequels and how they were supposedly “shit” (well joke’s on you Julian they’re now a fan favourite and an absolute gold-mine of memes)

He’d still watch it though, purely to see Leia’s tits in Return of the Jedi. Oh and he’d probably spoil THAT major plot twist in The Empire Strikes Back for the ghosts that haven’t seen it yet cause he’s an asshole

Thomas would quite enjoy it too - he’d defo fancy Leia (especially in THAT bikini) and he’d also be obsessed with Darth Vader’s frankly fabulous cape (i want a cape like that it’s giving me fashion envy)

Poor Mary would be so confused by it and probably think it’s witchcraft - especially Obi-Wan’s force ghost (tbh that would probably confuse quite a few of the ghosts ngl)

Robin on the other hand would love it - I reckon he’d be quite confused first cause there’s no moonah but by the end he’d be spewing quotes with Pat and Cap

Kitty probably wouldn’t be too interested UNTIL a certain Mr Han Solo comes along and after that she’d be glued to the tv. She’d probably fancy Lando too until he betrays Han in The Empire Strikes Back which would upset her. A lot. She’d probably also love the lines “I love you. I know”

Tbh it probably wouldn’t be Fanny’s cup of tea and at first she’d refuse to watch it but then Humphrey, who’s wonderfully open-minded, would encourage her to watch it “for Pat, to make him happy”

Humphrey would also probably be impressed by the legend that is John Williams’ score for the films

Darth Vader would defo be Thomas’s favourite character after he learns of his tragic backstory with Padme (and ofc the cape - never forget the cape) - he’d probably go on and on about how it was “so romantic” and how “he sacrificed everything for love” and be v dramatic about it all (as usual). He’d probably also be really sad when Vader dies (that makes two of us Thomas)

Overall I reckon it would just end up being an absolute classic in the Button household, just like Friends

Well that’s the end! May the Force be with you :))

[sophieakatz]

Thursday Thoughts: My Top Ten Muppets

Listeners of NPR’s Pop Culture Happy Hour recently cast their votes to rank the best Muppets – an impossible decision, really. And yet, once the top ten list was read aloud on the podcast, I found myself completely unsurprised. It’s a list that made sense, a list of safe bets. It’s also an incredibly Muppet Show-heavy list, even though the competition was open to Muppets of all properties, including Sesame Street and my beloved Dark Crystal. The full top 25 list, available here, reveals that a few Sesame Street Muppets ranked in the teens, but still. We all know the top ten is where it’s at, and this top ten was neither creative nor representative. It struck me as a list of popular Muppets, not a list of the best Muppets. Most of my favorites weren’t on that list at all!

So, here’s my take on the ten best Muppets – and because I don’t believe in objective Muppet rankings, I want YOU to reblog this post and tell me your favorites!

10. Swedish Chef              

The Chef came in ninth on NPR’s rankings, and I gotta be honest, I’m on the same page with them on this one. Maybe it’s the fact that when he comes onscreen, there’s no way to predict how the sketch will end. Maybe it’s the bizarreness of human fingers on Muppet arms – and knowing that those arms indicate a frankly superhuman feat of teamwork going on under the table. Maybe it’s just the Popcorn video, which always brightens my mood. Whatever it is, the Swedish Chef is definitely tenth best.

9. Fozzie Bear

I like Fozzie. He’s an underdog, never giving up in his pursuit of fame and audience acclaim. And even though his whole shtick is that he can’t succeed – Statler and Waldorf always get bigger laughs during his bits – he objectively has succeeded, because he’s still around and making us laugh after all these years.

What puts Fozzie in the top ten for me, though, is that I genuinely find his jokes funny. Honestly. I really do. So maybe Fozzie Bear sketches don’t really work for me, but Fozzie Bear himself does.

8. Rosita

I mentioned my disappointment before in the “official” ranking’s lack of Sesame Street characters. Sure, the cast of The Muppet Show has had a notable cultural impact, but it would be a disservice to Muppetkind if we ignored the impact of their friends on Sesame Street.

I could never forget Rosita. She’s not the most popular Muppet; she’s never had a super catchy song or a roll-on-the-floor-laughing one-liner to rival the others’ success. But her “Spanish Word of the Day” segments have a permanent spot in my memory. She’s sweet, she’s sincere, and she’s an excellent friend to her more famous fellow Muppets. (And as a bilingual Muppet, she’s really hecking important – there’s an episode where she deals with some kids making fun of her accent, and it’s equal parts heartbreaking and heartwarming!)

7. Rowlf

While other Muppets have one-note personalities – see number 10 on this list above, and number 5 below – there’s also Muppets like Rowlf. He’s not an “Anything Muppet,” by any means – he’s a character in his own right – but Rowlf is a dog who rises to any occasion. He sits at the piano to bring both beautiful classical pieces and hilarious parodies to life, and it’s all music to my ears. He can be the Straight Man to more chaotic Muppets’ antics, but just one clip of “Veterinarian’s Hospital” proves that he’s got enough silliness in him to take center stage.

And all the while, no matter what role he’s playing, he’s still that chill dog I adore – calm and adorable, with that round black nose, those big fluffy paws, and those floppy ears just begging to be scratched.

6. Deethra

As much as I love the original Dark Crystal film, the Netflix prequel series Age of Resistance has one big thing going for it: its characters. The protagonists of this show draw me in and make me care, quickly and continually. And best among them all is Deet. Deethra the Gelfling – small and beautiful, kind and powerful. She cares wholeheartedly about the world around her, and that care begets a wisdom that balances out her naivete in fascinating ways.

Muppets are so often silly, and we love them for it. But Deet embodies the Muppets’ potential to tell a serious story, a potential we would be remiss to ignore.

5. Animal

Oh my god, Animal. If you want to talk about the sheer silliness of Muppets, you need to talk about Animal. There’s just no way around it. He’s loud ��� in both sound and color scheme. And he’s absolutely bonkers. I know every drummer has an Animal in them, and it’s likely that all humans do. We’re just not all comfortable with letting him out to play.

That’s what’s so great about watching Animal do his thing. He has no inhibitions; he is freedom, he is chaos. And he lets me feel a little freer by association.

4. Hup

I talked a bit about underdogs in the Fozzie Bear section above. There’s an essay to be written about the Muppet as underdog; it’s an essential Muppet quality. Muppets are characters you logically wouldn’t expect to succeed, but they persevere, nonetheless.

Hup is the underdog of Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance. He’s the Podling who wants to be a paladin. Dear god he’s adorable, dear god he’s funny, and dear god do you root for him (and his spoon) to save the day! Of all the characters in this show, he feels the most Muppety – and that’s why he’s higher on the list than Deet. He’s still a serious character in a serious story (when he cries… my goodness), but he’s got that classic Muppet spirit to him.

3. Elmo

You know, I just don’t get why Elmo gets such a bad rap. Is it that people think he’s annoying? Sure, he is! Muppets are objectively annoying characters – they all are. Yes, even the one you’re thinking of right now. But I fricking love Elmo. He’s joyful, he’s spirited, and he’s exploring the world around him in that carefree way only a child can – and he brings you along on that adventure! “Elmo’s World” is your world. “Elmo’s Song” is your song. Elmo’s laugh is fricking infectious. And yeah, I’m probably biased by nostalgia (my dad’s Elmo impression cracks me up to this day), but Elmo is a darn good Muppet and he deserves our respect and admiration.

2. SkekSil

On a completely different note… let’s talk about the Chamberlain. There aren’t really that many Muppet villains. There are plenty of Muppet henchmen, providing comic relief for a human actor who isn’t supposed to be seen as that much of a threat anyway. The Skeksis of Dark Crystal are a notable exception, and SkekSil, better known as the Chamberlain, stands out among them. He is evil and he is smart. I hate him, and at the same time, I am fascinated by him. He knows what he wants and how to get it, even though he’s nowhere near as strong as the other Skeksis. He is, in his own way, an underdog. He believes in himself, and he wields that confidence as a weapon, calmly explaining to his enemies why they should do what he wants. You just can’t look away. He’s an amazing character, embodying the dark side of Muppethood.

1. Cookie Monster

When my mom first shared that episode of Pop Culture Happy Hour with me, in which the hosts talked about their favorite Muppets, I first thought, “How could you decide?” And then Stephen Thompson said his favorite was Cookie Monster, and I shouted “YES!!!” out loud. Because he’s right – Cookie’s the best.

Cookie Monster is eternally funny, whether you’re five or fifty-five. Everything that comes out of his mouth is pure gold (“Why me not get royalties?”) He’s got the best songs – not only the classic “C is for Cookie,” but also “Me Want It (But Me Wait),” “Me Am What Me Am,” and the “Healthy Foods” rap. All the stuff I love about other Muppets on this list – the unpredictability, the ability to fit into any role a sketch requires, the lack of inhibitions, the confidence, the chaos, the unexpected moments of wisdom – he’s got it all. He’s irreplaceable, he’s lovable, and he’s the top of my Top Ten Muppets list.

[todaydreambelieversfic]

Author Spotlight: Coffeegleek Day 3

Author : @coffeegleek​

How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

At least a few revisions. Then multiple editing passes, and even with my spouse as my proofreader for the past 25+ years, and doing more editing passes before posting to AO3, I still find annoying little typos, sometimes large ones.

If you were to revise one of your older fics from start to finish, which would it be and why?

There was a crack fic I stopped writing years ago. It was a self-challenge during one of those tumblr trope challenges. I was trying to combine all of the tropes into the same fic as they were announced. It got zero traction though so I gave up. I'd love to go back and complete it, make it better. I had the whole thing outlined too.

What do you look for in a beta?

My spouse. We've been together for decades. He's been proofreading my original science fiction work and various fandoms' fanfics since before we were married. He even proofreads my Klaine smut and doesn't blink an eye. (He's a Glee fan too and on tumblr.) He knows what I'm trying to say when I can't find the right words and supplies them. He catches things I don't. What I love the most is for my original work, he's written his own fanfic. It's BAD. It truly is, but it's so heartfelt and earnest. He even came up with a soundtrack should I ever publish my sci-fi novel and the movie or show rights be bought. You really can't get a better beta than that. <3

There’s a number of friends on tumblr that I bounce ideas off of and who give me advice for topics they know far more about than me and google. I try to thank them in my fics.

If you could write the sequel (or prequel) to any fic out there not written by yourself, which would you choose?

I’m going to steal another author’s recent answer and say that I could never do someone else’s work justice. However, I would love to see the author’s ideas for their fics even if they couldn’t write a prequel or sequel.

I suck at remembering titles and author names. There were two political fics that I would love to read more of should their authors ever decide to write in those verses again. One was where Kurt and Blaine's dads were running for president and Kurt and Blaine were along for the ride, staying in the same hotels at time (where they first met,) having to do school remotely, having to be the perfect sons for the press and Blaine being fed up because his parents were conservative Republicans. Then there was another fic where Burt was president and Kurt was the First Son living in the White House, along with Finn, and it was hard to date when your every move is watched by the press.

Do you take liberties with canon or are you very strict about your fic being canon compliant?

I write AU, so canon is only a word often misspelled by me. :) Seriously though, I try to incorporate as many canon elements and characters into my AU fics as I can. It's the kind of AU I like to read as well. What draws me to read and write AUs is taking canon characters, putting them into a different setting, and seeing how they'll react. At their core, they still need to remain the same in principle and have many of the same traits. Like Kurt will always love fashion and be headstrong no matter what. Blaine is always going to have that spark within himself, no matter how depressed or oppressed he gets. Burt and Carole are always going to be loving and nurturing parents at heart. Even in fics where Burt isn't woke, there's a part of him that means well. (Not one of my own fics, but one I read a long time ago.) Different circumstances will change the canon characters and make them react in different ways though. Like, Kurt could end up more withdrawn and hide his love of fashion as a matter of survival and self preservation. He or Blaine could turn into "bad boys." Coach Beiste will always have a heart of gold. Miss Pillsbury will always have a problem with messes. Things like that. I know canon. Give me all the alternate universe versions of it and I will be a happy camper.

Talk about a review that made your day.

I haven't checked for reviews on my fics in ages (because I'm an insecure chicken) so I don't remember any specifically. I do remember there were many that made my day. There are those who take the time to review every chapter. Ones who write only a short note to thank me for writing the fic - both the angsty ones and the cracky fun ones. I love it when someone mentions something that no one else has that I was hoping someone would notice because I was proud of it. I'm not a popular author and don't get a lot of kudos or comments or reblogs compared to many. So each comment and kudos means a lot to me and I'd like to publicly thank every single person who wrote one or hit that kudos button.

Do you ever get rude reviews and how do you deal with them?

I once got a troll who decided it was his job to complain that I had misspelled hors d'oeuvres in one sentence out of an entire verse where the word was written multiple times correctly. It was a series of Klaine Advent one shots for the Empty Nest verse. At first I was shocked and replied with an apology. Then I was, "F this. The person is a troll who didn't read any other part of the fic or verse, just this one quickly written one shot entry, and if all they had to say was that I'd misspelled a commonly misspelled word, then they aren't worth my time." I deleted the comment. There's concrit and trolling. It wasn't concrit.

What advice do you have for people just starting to write?

Have fun writing, even the hard stuff. Know that it's okay to take breaks. Try your best and know you'll get better the more you write and the more you read. Pronouns are your friend and free. Don't put, "I know this is going to suck, so whatever," in your fic description. We all suck at times. It's a part of writing. But if you want folks to read it, using that as your fic's summary isn't the way to go. Just my opinions, which won't even buy you a cup of coffee.

Which fic do you most like to discuss with other people? Why?  

I think it’s pretty obvious from all of my rambling that I enjoy talking about both of my series - Empty Nest verse and A Very Hallmark Christmas verse.  I'm not a popular author and I know my fics, especially the Empty Nest verse ones, aren’t everyone’s thing, so I never get to really discuss them except with friends that I bug to death in private and via long replies to comments on AO3. (You all are saints blessed by all of the good and patient gods.) I have so much to say about them - the process of writing them, the world building, research, and character decisions that went into every single one. I know they’re not perfect. I know the Empty Nest verse grew miles beyond the ficlette about Burt and Carole that it was meant to be. I know my sense of humor in the Hallmark verse isn’t everyone’s thing either. I still worked really hard on them and am glad that I did. Empty Nest let me release a lot of the fear and anxiety I had for my Hispanic and gay son after the 2016 election. The Hallmark ones were a needed break to put some humor into my life. If others enjoyed them, great. If folks want to know more, my inbox is always open.

What's one aspect of writing fic that gets you really excited?

Writing humor even if I'm the only one that finds it funny. As I said above, writing the Hallmark Christmas movie dialogue and plot and the actors as they were filming it was a blast. Writing the commercials was fun and exciting. In my angsty fics, knowing I wrote a good scene, line, or moment that brought out all the feels. That's more of “satisfaction of a job well done” than excited.

***

Check out Coffeegleek’s Fics

Humorous Spooky Drabbles -  Humorous drabbles to spookish type prompts based on a tumblr post called October Drabble Prompts #1 by hallofceleano. The parts in bold and italic are from those prompts. Characters include Kurt, Blaine, Burt, Carole, and Finn. All fun; only #4 has some mild angst. #4 is for snarkyhag and regarding #5 - I know next to nothing about Twilight and had to look up Taylor Lautner on imdb. The liberties I took are my own.

A Very Sloppy Christmas - lucy8675309 posted to tumblr a series of gifs with Kurt dressed up as an elf. It inspired me to write the following prompt, which CoffeeAddict80 encouraged me to write as a fic:

I now want a fic where real Santa’s elf!Kurt gets drunk and vents to Blaine about all the woes of working for Santa. He’s over 100 years old and the outfits are terrible. Why couldn’t they wear clothes like the elves did in that one movie? Drunk elf Kurt has no idea he’s venting to Santa’s son.

Bonus if he wakes up and realizes he just had a drunken one night stand. He isn’t sure who it was with. Only that he’s naked, the guy in the bed beside him is naked and showing off a really great ass. Then said guy turns over and after Kurt’s done staring at his dick, he looks at the guy’s face and realizes who it is.

It’s a Twisted World -  I decided to challenge myself by combining the posted 5 weekly Klaine AU Friday themes and adding another one of my own. So that means: Farm, Fairytale, Vintage (1900’s,) Super Powers, Zombie Apocalypse, and Harry Potter World Klaine with a splash of a fic idea I thought of while in the produce section of the grocery store. Each week, the story will continue, though each part stands alone. This is not a brilliant work of perfectly composed fan fiction. What it is, is fast-paced, cracky fun, with a large dose of innuendo. At least it had my son laughing his ass off. I hope y'all enjoy it too. :)

[naughtygirl286]

So yup We Went to see the Snake Eyes movie this past Tuesday. I'm not a huge G.I. Joe fan but I watched plenty of it, all the original animated series and the other various TV shows and previous movies which I did enjoy. I did like the previous Live action movies. So, with all that I was interested in going to see it also I have plenty of friends who are big G.I. Joe fans so with them going too I had no problems.

also there wasn't any cups or buckets or anything for this which I thought was a bit surprising but oh well.  I do wonder if they'll have something for The Suicide Squad tho?  anyway...

Now personally I'd have to say I thought it was pretty good and I did enjoy it for the most part.  I thought the action was great alot of the fight sequences were excellent and some of the stunt work was pretty amazing which includes the truck chase sequence.

Now being this is a origin story I felt it kinda strange being this didn't match up with some of the origin story you see in the previous G.I.Joe movies?   being I thought this was a prequel to those but apparently its a reboot of the G.I.Joe movies Also for a guy who is famous for not talking he does do alot of talking in this... and I was again told the film is "the origin story before he's lost his voice." which of course makes sense to me.  

Also being this is mainly Snake Eyes centric movie and deals with all the characters around him and how he becomes the black clad Ninja he is not a member of the Joes team yet.   although both G.I. Joe and Cobra are mentioned kinda in the background of this (Cobra more then the Joes) and characters of both Scarlett and the Baroness make an appearance and I did like how they looked on screen one thing I would have probably have liked if Baroness mentioned Destro or Cobra Commander but she doesn't from what I remember. but, it would have been cool.

finally I did think it was pretty well acted especially   Henry Golding who I thought was great in this. but other then that I thought the movie was pretty good. Like I said I'm not a huge G.I. Joe fan so I can't say I have any real complaints about it. It was a fun action movie so I enjoyed it for the most part and if you happened to like the previous ones you might like this one too.

[luci-cunt]

Tell me about Magneto🤭

MAY YOU CAN’T SEE IT BUT IM KISSING YOU SO PASSIONATELY RIGHT NOW

Ok so listeeennnn tooooo meeeee, okokokok, so a while ago I went on this James McAvoy bender--don’t ask--and I saw he was in the X-Men movies, whic hi haven’t watched since the Wolverine movies/ Last Stand when I was like, actually a baby. So anyways I flipped them on thinking “yeah what could go wrong?” except I watched them in the wrong order

Anyways here’s an essay on why neither Erik or Prof X was right and the actual answer would be to compromise and these movies how how because they’re both too stubborn and couldn’t it destroyed their friendship and fucked everything up. 

Also the fact that X-Men: First Class is the best Villain origin story to ever cross the screen.

Ok so spoilers ahead for X-Men: Days of Future Past and X-Men: First Class

Now, it should be noted that I’m no an X-Men expert I just love these two movies. 

So for some context: First Class and Days of Future Past are both kind of prequels, except DoFP is a prequel-sequel?? becuase of time travel?? I’ll explain don’t worry. The point is, they take place in the past where all the characters are younger. James McAvoy plays Professor X (who I’ll just be calling X for this whole thing), Michael Fassbender plays Magneto (aka Erik), oh and Jennifer Lawrence plays Mystic--who will be appearing in this essay XDD. 

Alright so first of all have a plot summary: DoFP is about Wolverine getting sent back in time so he can convince a younger Prof X to stop Raven (aka Mystic) from getting caught by this guy Trask who then uses her DNA to create super weapons that irradiate all mutants. The current future Wolverine is in, he, prof X, Magneto, and a few other mutants are trying their best to survive but it’s a losing battle and their only hope is to literally change the past. 

This one takes place after the events of First Class, which I will now explain. 

So in First Class a younger Prof X and Magneto team up to find and recruit bb mutants to X’s school because the government wants to use Mutants to help fight the Russians (oh head this takes placee in the 1960′s right before the Cuban Missile Crisis). This is essentially a Magneto origin story and also--in my opinion--the best villain origin story to ever cross the screen. 

OK so now some details on our main characters: 

Magneto/ Erik Lehnsherr: a literal holocaust survivor who’s only goal in the begining of the story is hunting/ killing nazi’s, specifically one nazi who tortured him specifically and I will get into him later don’t worry. 

Professor X: super smart rich white boy with a heart of gold but also enough naivete to make a lamb look like a Stephen King character. 

Already you can see very stark differences between the two of them. Erik is set up as being a staunch pessimist while X is a vivid optimist, and that makes sense. X’s grown up sheltered and never wanting for anythign while Erik suffered a trainwreck of the greatest traumas in human existence hitting him over and over and over again from like age fucking 9. 

Ok also tehre’s J-Law’s character Raven, who is a mutant that can change her skin to look like anythign she wants it to but her actual form is blue/ scaly/ “not pretty” (bullshit but ok). She met X when she broke into his house one night to steal some food and then they became friends, their relationship will become important later but for now that’s all u need to know. 

ok so anyways, in the begining of First Class Erik is hunting + killing Nazi’s, specifically looking for this one called Schmidt because when Erik was little he and his family were carted away to a concentration camp where Schmidt witness Erik use his metal bending powers and decided to “train” him. aka physically/ mentally abuse him for years. The whole thing starts with Schmidt trying to get Erik to lift a metal coin with his mind, when he can’t (because he’s a child who didn’t even know he had his powers until literally hours ago) Schmidt puts his mother’s life on the line and when he still can’t Schmidt kills her. This sends Erik it’s a rage and he crushes some nazi heads but then Schmidt is still standing and mentions how “oh gotcha, so it’s rage and pain that’s the key to your powers huh?” anyways this tidbit and the coin will become important later trust me--

Meanwhile Prof X is graduating from Oxford/ generally being an idiot pretty boy. He’s a telepath who knows about his powers and has used them from an early age. He also wrote some big paper on mutants, which gets the attention of an FBI agent who witnesses the villains being mutants and wants his advice

However, the villains just so happen to be Schmidt, who’s going by “Shaw” now, so when X and the agents catch up to him Erik is already there and on a mission to murder his ass. Some bs happens, Erik tries to pull a submarine out of the water but can’t (T-T this will be important) and X jumps into the water to stop him because the mental stress is literally killing him. 

That’s how they meet. 

It’s important to note: up until this point, Erik didn’t know there were other mutants, so meeting X, who’s friends with Raven, is kind of a big deal for him. He and X become very fast friends and also have a very homoerotic montage where they become dads for a bunch of mutant teenagers, because they realize they can use X to track all these baby mutants, collect them, and train them so they don’t grow up fearing their powers. 

Anyways, the other thing about this is that now that Erik has this newfound group of people that are just like him, he’s opening up, and X is helping him realize he’s actually so much more powerful when he taps into happy memories rather than fueling himself on pain and rage. This scene always makes me sob oh my god--

Also, fellas--is it gay to “access the brightest cortex” of your homies memories and remind him that hate and pain are not good motivators before reminding him that he has good memories he can draw on and showing him that his life has not been entirely painful?

YEs, the answer is yes are u shitting me??

ok so anyways--something to note about this is that X and Erik are both very protective of all their new kids, but Erik is especially so. I’m going to be getting into this more but just tab thsi thought for later :)

Now, the plot’s kicking up a bit, because it’s at this point that Erik and X capture one of Shaw’s (aka the nazi’s) main lackies and they question her until she gives them the info that Shaw’s planning on using the Cuban Missile Crisis tensions to start a nuclear war to wipe out all humans so that only mutants survive in the new world. 

Obviously they want to stop him, but also, you can kind of tell that Erik is not totally against this plan, which only gets to be more later but that’s for later. 

Right now I wanna take a quick break to talk about Raven--aka Mystic, aka J-Law. She and X were childhood friends and she kind of clung to him because she doesn’t have family/ anyone she can really be herself around besides him. 

X insistently says throughout the movie he sees her as a sister, but it’s kinda obvious she’d be down to fuck. She has this big plotline where she keeps trying to get X to understand why it’s so frustrating for her to have to be using energy to look “human.” Because her natural form is the one with the blue skin. X doesn’t understand this because his power is easy to hide, it’s simple for him to just fake-human and have no one be any wiser, Raven, however, doesn’t have that luxury and when she tries to explain this to X it just flies over his head, insisting she hide her natural self to better fit in if that’s what she really wants. 

Queue Erik, who comes in as a king of self love. He’s pretty blunt about it, but his point is basically “you’re wasting energy by constantly pretending you’re something you’re not--stop” and she responds essentially with “yeah but then no one will like me” to which he responds “then make them.”  

Raven’s relationship with both the boys is used through both First Class and DoFP to really highlight their faults. X believes humans and mutants can coexist but he thinks we go about doign that by completely ignoring the pages of history of abuse mutants have suffered--and it’s mostly because he hasn’t experienced it. 

Erik on the other hand will do everything and anything he possibly can to protect his new family/ people, and in his head that means exterminating any and all threats. By the end of the movie--humans become one of those threats. 

The point of this whole ramble is that: they both represent utter opposites, BUT, X’s blind optimism and Erik’s blind pessimism are equally bad.

Ok so back to plot for a second to prove this. 

Shaw is revealed to be a mutant himself and he also has a helmet that can block telepathy. (yes it’s the magneto helmetjasjd;fkjaskl;dfjasldkj jsut wait).

His plan’s complicated but basically: he’s going to poke America and Russia until they pop and incite a nuclear war. And it works. The whole pre-climax of the film sees X, Erik, Raven, and the other mutants all working double time to stop Shaw’s plan (AND IT INVOLVES ERIK SUCCESSFULLY PULING A SUBMARINE OUT OF THE WATER!!! BECAUSE NOW HE’S USING HAPPINESS INSTEAD OF ANGER/ PAIN!!!). 

Anywho, they’re doing all this, but then some bullshit happens, the plane they’re on crashes oh and -- yeah there’s this part where Erik uses himself as a seatbelt for X it’s fantastic but anyways--

This is finally the climax of the film. 

Also possibly the greatest scene in film history in my humble opinion. 

Because listen--in order to stop Shaw they need the helmet off of him so that X can telepathically freeze his ass and they can arrest him or whatever. So they split up--Erik rushes into the wreckage to find Shaw and X stays behind ready to freeze the guy as soon as the helmet comes off but--

Well, vengence is just too tempting. 

So when Erik gets Shaws helmet off, X freezes the guy, and he’s ecstatic, at least until he realizes Erik plans on killing Shaw. 

He’s pleading with Erik because this is vengence and he can’t chose that but Erik just puts on the helmet and--taunts Shaw, pulling out the coin Shaw taunted him with all those years ago and in a mimickry of the game Shaw forced him to play as a child and killed his mother over--he slowly floats the coin at Shaws head, telling him “I’m going to count to ten, and all you have to do is move.” 

But he can’t--because X is holding him--and that’s the point, Erik wants him as helpless as he was, and X can’t let his hold on Shaw go because that would mean putting Erik in danger but he’s also in Shaws head so he feels the coin go through his head as though Erik was doing it to him and the fucking cinematography in this scene is so fuaksdjf;laksjd;fjasd;lkfjadsl;asdjf;ljL:DKJFL:SDKJFL:D KFUCKKKKK

This scene is cinematic perfection don’t fucking lOOK at me unless you agree.

T-T and then, it only gets worse, because now Erik’s finally finished his original purpose--killing the man who killed his mother and ruined his life--and now he’s got a new one, aka protecting his new family aka the mutants. 

AND HE’S ONLY PROVEN RIGHT THAT HUMANS ARE A THREAT BECAUSE THEY TURN AND TRY TO KILL ALL THE MUTANTS IN THE PLANE CRASH AND JSUT--

And so he stops all the missiles flying their way, and turns them around on the humans and X has to stop him but he’s not listening and the rawest fucking line in the whole movie comes when X says

“There’s hundreds of men on those ships--innocent men. They’re just following orders!” 

And Erik simply replies, “I’ve been at the mercy of men ��just following orders’--never again.” 

And then he goes to blow up the shipsthen one of the other characters goes to shoot Erik and he deflects the bullet wtihout thinking right. into. X’s. back. 

Paralysing him. 

And just akjd;fjasdflkjasd;lfkj this scene speaks for itself

Listen just--akjdsf;ljasdlk jguys this movie has no right being this good.

And then the movie closes off with X and Erik literally begging one another to just see it their way--because they both want so badly to be on the same side but they’re too stubborn and they refuse to see compromise and just ajkdf;lja;sdkfja;sdljkfsadlkf

Ok I realize now that I barely talked about DoFP but this is already so long. The major things I was going to bring up was teh absolutely fantastic bitter exes energy that McAvoy and Fassbender bring to that movie it’s excellent but also the fact that X is literally the only person Erik goes out of his way not to kill despite standing directly in the way of Erik’s goal. 

Like, you remember my whole deal with Raven??? yeah that’s x10 in DoFP (which takes place quickly after this movie) yeah so her and Erik are close, and shown to be close, but the second he thinks she endangers his fam he literally 180′s so quick and tries to straight up murder her. 

BUT HE FUCKING BENDS THE BULLET AROUND X’s HEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! X!!!!!!!!!! WHO’S LITERALLY 100% AGAINST HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JUST

Ok, that’s all. By the way I don’t want to like, up your expecations too much because I actually kind of hate X-Men: First Class almost as much as I love it?? it’s very..... of it’s era, and cheesy, and dumb--but fucking magneto you guys holy SHIT

[knifesxedge]

you really are about to unlock smth bc a) i have SO many thoughts on the sequel trilogy and b) im DESPERATE for a distraction so um. i think about the prequel trilogy and i really truly start to lose it. bc force awakens was SO GOOD. like remember the first time you watched it and you (me, but maybe you as well) were like? HOLY SHIT. it was obviously a new hope v2 but it was FRESH and NEW and there were cool characters that i CARED about. (1/3)

HELL YEAH let’s get into it ok ok ok OPINIONS INCOMING.

TOTALLY with u on this. like the prequels make me mad about the wasted potential but tbh the sequel trilogy is just like. draining emotionally because they LOOK so fucking good. the force awakens WAS so so good, like very very star wars even if it was following the plot beats of anh. and then it just. tanked itself holy shit. like at least the prequels look bad, sound bad, it’s like a comical level of tragic. the sequel trilogy feels like having chalk dust spread all over my skin and then being put in an echo chamber of nails on a chalkboard 😔 at this point even tfa comes with a TINY lil bit of like 😞 just because i know what comes after but YES tfa is one of those star wars movies that just FEELS so fucking star wars it makes me unhinged. “THATS ONE HELL OF A PILOT” YEAH BITCH!!! IT IS!!!!! GAY PEOPLE!!!

the last jedi. a mess. i like certain rian johnson films but he should not be allowed to be anywhere near Star Wars. my main problem? (beyond the racism and romanticizing stalking and emotional and physical abuse?) it doesn’t FEEL like star wars. like. ok even in the darkest moments in mainstream star wars films they are SUPPOSED to feel hopeful. tlj feels like watching a train wreck in slow motion it’s just like shitty thing after shitty thing after shitty thing happening to the main cast. i think the casino planet’s design was a little lazy and WAY too underlit and rose’s character was pointless in the way she was shown in the movie. exhausting. the jokes were all on the wrong edge of disrespectful to the characters and the original star wars like luke tossing the lightsaber over his shoulder? appalling. not funny just there for shock value. everyone is out of character. everyone is stressed and miserable all the time. aside from things i didn’t really want to see but wouldn’t have argued with in a better movie (ie luke dying) it really was just a racist misogynistic mess. oh yeah did i mention how they did rey’s character dirty because she went from being a scrappy desert mechanic who’s a little dorky and just trying to find a family and a place in the galaxy to Bland White Girl Servicing a Man’s Character. that pales in comparison to how finn poe and rose’s characters were treated but HOLY shit. i walked out of the theater crying. tfa raised my expectations only to have tlj smash them down to the floor it was. hhhhh ok ok ok im trying to think if i liked anything from the movie. um. you were right it looked good! sound and score were great as usual. i did think poe’s conversation with hux at the beginning was funny. i really liked when leia used the force to come back to the ship (ik that was a controversial scene for some people but i did really like that scene. she deserves it). laura dern is cool i hated her character but in theory laura dern being leia’s lesbian boarding school friend is neat. but yeah im sorry i really REALLY didn’t like that movie we only saw it in theaters once it was so bad. :( i do agree with u abt the force mysticism being cool tho!

rise of skywalker. now maybe it’s because the bar was on the floor after tlj. but i actually liked it quite a bit. still kind of a mess. jj trying to retcon all of the stuff from the last movie because for some reason he wasn’t just allowed to do the whole trilogy. the pacing being a nightmare for the first half. the atrocious abuser-validating kiss at the end. but im gonna be real after having to sit through tlj i was happy enough just to see the main trio back together and finn and poe being treated with more respect to care much about that stuff. disney queerbaits me once again but that’s on me for clowning. i really genuinely liked the scene where rey passes the lightsaber to kylo i thought that was cool but it was overshadowed by the knowledge that the Kiss 🤮 was coming so i didn’t get to enjoy it like i wanted. ALSO hayden christiansen and all the other actors doing the voices in the scene where rey is fighting the emperor (who im pretty sure was only in there because RIAN put the trilogy’s intended big bad into a sparkly gold bathrobe and killed him off in the second movie but im not complaining about seeing ian mcdiarmid) were apparently on set in costume and force ghosts were supposed to protect her in like a big circle and what im saying is i feel robbed and cheated and feral

the only movie of the three i REALLY liked was tfa. now we’re back to How Would I Fix It. step one fire rian johnson. step two put JJ on the whole trilogy and HOLD HIM ACCOUNTABLE for having a plot planned out, or else get a different director TO DO ALL THREE MOVIES. none of this middle of the road “trying to appease both sides of the fandom” bullshit. kylo dies at the end and they DO NOT kiss and that is all the redemption he gets. if disney is claiming gay rep then they SHOW us ACTUAL gay representation. poe and finn kiss on screen and we don’t get a two second blurry background kiss between random characters. completely toss out whatever the fuck that plot was supposed to be in tlj and separate ros into two movies so JJ could actually DO the entire plot he had planned (instead of disney execs chopping down what was p much a four hour movie into two hours twenty two minutes which was SHORTER than the two hour forty minute cut jj reluctantly okayed but i DIGRESS).

god. what the fuck. anyways sorry for completely going off the rails but ty for sharing ur sequel trilogy opinions and ty for letting me rant sorry this got so long but ily!!! ❣️💕💝

[ninasfireescape]

The ‘Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker’ review no one asked for

I wanted to enjoy it. I really did.

I was one of the people who didn’t dislike The Last Jedi. Sure, I didn’t love it. When I watched it, I thought it was too long and had made certain characters choices I wasn’t too happy with, but overall it was enjoyable and left me feeling satisfied. It was not as good as The Force Awakens however and hearing JJ Abrams was returning, I thought he might be able to restore the final episode to its former glory.

That indeed seemed like the case for the first hour. The gang were back together, it was quick-paced, I had an emotional investment in what was going on (and it seemed like they were taking the Finnrey route I wanted them too). I couldn’t exactly follow every plot specific but does that really matter in Star Wars when it’s so exciting? The bit on Star Killer base was genuinely inspired, I was laughing away at once again what terrible shots the stormtroopers were and at Hux being the spy. Every scene with Lando in was gold.

It was just after they got to the water planet that things started to go wrong. I’m not sure quite what it was exactly that made it so disappointing from this point onwards. Perhaps the gang splitting up or the rather horrifically done Leia death scene. I know they didn’t really have much choice with what footage they had but having watched each member of the original trio died, this death was devoid of emotion and predictable. And she died to make Kylo Ren hesitate for one moment. What a waste!

Then the pointless force ghosts! Seeing Luke was nice but it felt like he was just there to add clunky explanation since the plot made so little sense at this point. And when Han appeared, I actually laughed. It was so inconsistent with the tone of the film and he appeared all while Kylo Ren was standing in the middle of a stormy sea that he could fall into at any moment, right in the most climactic section of the film, just to have a conversation with the son who killed him! It was the most outrageous example of a fan service cameo that just didn’t assimilate with the rest of the film.

I don’t actually have a problem with Rey Palpatine. If anything, I thought it was really cool she was a Palpatine. I really didn’t want her to be a Skywalker because I felt it would be predictable and repetitive. Her being a Palpatine also sends the message to young viewers that blood relations don’t make a family which I think is very important for children to hear. Honestly, the only problem I have with it is that it means some poor lady had sex with Palpatine. I agree that it was a ridiculous retcon of The Last Jedi but then I didn’t like the reveal about her parents in TLJ anyway because of how it was executed. Another thing that bothers me about it is the utter lack of information we get about Villanelle Rey’s mother. Already we don’t know much about her father other than that he’s Palpatine’s son but with her mother, we get nothing. With Rey having wondered about who her parents were for so long, surely it would make sense for her to want to know more about her mother and maybe even take her surname in place of ‘Palpatine’. I also firmly believe Rey’s mother should have been played by Hayley Atwell because she looks so much like Daisy Ridley. And while Jodie Comer is an amazing actress, I think 1. She deserves a bigger role in the Star Wars franchise and 2. Her casting as Rey’s mother exemplifies Hollywood’s fear of casting older actresses as mothers. A twenty six year old as a mother!?

About Zurii, I always appreciate new female characters in Star Wars and I thought she had a great design. However, it is blatantly clear what her purpose in the film was. It was to stop people calling Poe gay, inserting a female character for one scene (she barely spoke in her other scenes so I’m not counting those) with no backstory of her own, just to prove he is attracted to women. Well, first of all, he can be bi, secondly, that’s not going to stop people shipping Finnpoe at all. I didn’t clock until afterwards when I saw people talking about it online, but it was super problematic to make Poe a former drug dealer. Sure, the only Latino character in this trilogy. Also, it in general complicates the little we know about Poe’s backstory so far.

With Rose, all our worst fears were confirmed. She just wasn’t there. She appeared in a couple of scenes and had some lines but you’d think she was no more than another miscellaneous rebel, no more significant a role than Billie Lourd’s character. Did they really give into the white fanboy pressure? How could they erase Rose when she was such a good character? She was tough and fought strongly for her beliefs, but she was also compassionate, sensitive. Now, I never particularly shipped Finn and Rose in TLJ. I thought it seemed a bit of a rushed romance and Finn didn’t seem that invested in the kiss they shared. However, you can’t just pretend they didn’t kiss in the last film. They interacted a few times but there was no sense of any bond between them. Where there relationship stood was unclear. Were they now a couple or had they had an offscreen conversation where they decided they were better off as friends? Who knows?

And now onto the worst part of the film: Kylo Ren and more specifically that kiss. Gross. Okay, to be clear, I wasn’t entirely opposed to a redemption arc for Kylo Ren. Sure, it would be predictable, but it’s not like Kylo Ren’s crimes are any worse than those of Darth Vader and he was still capable of redemption. I liked Kylo Ren as a villain. He perfectly depicted that type of whiny, entitled white man who we see so commonly in real life, but again, he could have achieved some redemption if it were implemented correctly. What we got in the film was not this. He was still committing genocide at the start and carried out one good deed which was saving the woman he had a crush on. For this one good act, he was entirely forgiven and somehow all of the genocide wasn’t his fault. And he got rewarded with the woman! If anything, I’d call that act selfish since he only wanted to save the woman he liked. Adam Driver did the best he could with it but everything about it was awful. And it was out of character for Rey to kiss him and forgive him. She stabbed him little more than half an hour earlier! At the end of the last film, she slammed a door in his face. It makes no sense to me how she could suddenly be so invested in him becoming a better person. There’s also the fact that wasn’t included in the films that Rey and Kylo Ren are related (aunt and nephew to be exact). I wasn’t aware this was Game of Thrones! And according to Wookiepedia, Rey was 18 at the start of the films and is now 20 whereas Kylo Ren is now 30. A ten year age different would be fine if Rey were older but at this point, the age gap is uncomfortable and very borderline.

If they’re going to make the claim that it wasn’t actually Kylo Ren who was doing the evil deeds but some dark force corrupting him, they should have explained how the mechanism works. At least in the prequels, we got some sense of Anakin slowly being corrupted. To me, it reads like in some horror films when the abusive characters are found to have been possessed by demons or something. It trivializes abuse which is something very real, acting instead as if no abusers can actually be responsible for their actions and it is the cause of some supernatural force instead. I suppose the kiss doesn’t have to mean anything. After all, Leia and Luke kissed in the original trilogy and Finn and Rose kissed and apparently that meant nothing.

I firmly believe the series intended a Finn and Rey romance. Lest we forget The Force Awakens, Finn awkwardly asking Rey if she had a boyfriend. That was clear coding for him having a crush on her. In that film, the two developed such a strong bond, and they have so much more chemistry than Rey and Kylo Ren ever had. All the scenes with Rey and Finn (and Poe) were full of light and emotion. The scene at the end where the three of them hugged was honestly the high point of the film. Now, when I left the cinema, what was plaguing my mind the most was that throughout the film, Finn had a secret he wanted to tell Rey. It was first suggested when they thought they were going to die in the quicksand. “Wait, Rey, I never told you!” It had to be that he loved her. What else could it be? Supposedly, it was that he was force sensitive. I don’t believe that for one second. If he needed to tell her that, why couldn’t Poe be included? And why did he never get the chance to tell her? It was a build-up I got invested in with no payoff. It must have been that he loved her. So, if that was the case, that leaves us with two options. Either there was a Finnrey subplot that got cut but they forgot to cut these scenes out (or simply couldn’t be bothered to), or they thought it would be funny to have the black supposed male lead chasing after the white female lead who didn’t love him back because she was instead in love with the genocidal white villain. I ship Finnrey so much and find the second option so horrific but I wouldn’t put it past the writers. Finn played such a significant role in the first half of the film, as he should since he’s meant to be the male lead in the series, but after that, he was dangerously underutilized. At least the ending where no one ends up with each other is compliant with my headcanon that Rey, Finn and Poe (and I don’t mind Rose being in the mix too) all end up married to each other and adopt a bunch of porgs.

And lastly, the lesbian scene. Pathetic. We don’t know the character names and I can’t even find out who the actresses were that played them. Okay, they kissed which is a pretty big deal (even though kisses apparently mean nothing in Star Wars) and it’s certainly a step forward from the Avengers: Endgame ‘’’’representation’’’’, but it’s still rather useless considering the big deal JJ Abrams made about how there would be representation.

[hero-with-fear]

TROS Thoughts (((SPOILERS)))

Last chance! Go no further if you haven’t seen it.

Ben Solo: I’ve seen a lot of outrage on the internet about Ben’s fate and I have to say...it’s the best outcome that he could have had. Let’s look at his story logically--he’s responsible for the murder of thousands, he’s the last of his family, he personally destroyed the place Jedi have called home ever since his grandfather destroyed the place the Jedi called home......and then he redeemed himself by coming to his senses and realizing what he had to do. He stepped up, became the boy we all knew he had it in him to be, and died giving life to the last of the Jedi.  I loved it. And let’s stop and be real for a second: there was no other fate for him. Ever since he started his murder spree, there could be no other outcome. It’s the same with Anakin: if Anakin had come to his senses after purging the Temple and found the light again, he STILL would have had to answer for the deaths of thousands. Ben would have been either locked away or executed because he would have to accept his part in the crimes of the First Order. No amount of troubled past would ultimately justify the terrible choices he’d made. It had to be that way. I leaned over to my sister after his turn to the light and said: “Okay...my idiot sandwich grandson isn’t an idiot sandwich anymore. I officially claim him.” 

Rey: My girl. She did it. I’m so proud. And that’s coming from someone who spends a lot of time in Anakin’s brain. She isn’t The Chosen One...and the movie conveys that fact. If anything, she’s a representation of The Daughter from the Mortis Arc of the Clone Wars. Rey is a balm. Her destiny was to heal the wound the Skywalker family left in the galaxy and boy did she! And she didn’t do it alone! She had the legacy of centuries of Jedi behind her and Anakin Skywalker’s grandson to act as a balance (arguably, the embodiment of The Son). Rey is the embodiment of faith. She doesn’t give herself to her fears, wants and desires; she does what she feels the Force is guiding her to do. She is not OP because her lineage provided her with a strong connection to the Force. But even without that, Rey is still Rey Nobody. She didn’t need Palpatine’s revelation to get to the place she was at the end of the film. She got there herself. She chose to not be afraid and gave her life to end the last remnant of real darkness in the immediate timeline. She is someone that young Jedi in the Prequels era would have read about in their studies at the Temple...someone that gave themselves to the Force to end evil. I loved her role in the film and I love her. Baby girl.

Finn & Poe: Thank goodness for screen time. John and Oscar actually had a dynamic in this film to play off of and the screen time to do it. They both performed stunts of heroism and had individual characteristics that didn’t just make them secondary characters to Rey...something TLJ suffered from. They got to be people in their own right. The complaints that I keep seeing about them seems to be focused on shipping, the trio aspect, and representation arguments. Once again, they felt like people living their lives in the Star Wars universe. I have no issue with anything they got to do. (But John Boyega needs a franchise that puts him on the poster for a change.)

The Force: Another aspect that keeps getting battled around is the Force use in the movie. I’m not gonna lie, when she and (at the time) Kylo were playing tug-of-war with a shuttle I was like UMMMMMMM EXCUSE ME. But then I gave it some thought and forgave it because a few things dawned on me. First of all, the duality of Rey and Kylo’s connection made some of the mad Force connection plausible. But what really made sense to me was that Rey and Ben are using their common skills in a galaxy where balance has been brought to the Force. It further solidified Anakin’s place in the universe and spoke to the time that has passed since the other films happened. Something @another-happy-landing pointed out to me: The Force was out of balance in the prequels, was seeking to be used in the original trilogy, and was simply with the protagonists in the sequels. It’s excellent narrative gold because it makes the Force exactly what we’ve always been told it is: all life bound together. It’s something that grows and changes with those it interacts with. It adapts with the life put into the galaxy. And now that a bunch of big names have become one with it, it’s incredibly accessible and powerful. Loved it.

Clone Palpatine & The Chosen One Argument: The thing calling itself Palpatine was the Force ghost entity left by the original Palpatine and a clone engineered by Sith followers and adherents. It’s something from Star Wars deep lore and was part of the EU until Disney killed the EU. It wasn’t a plot device conjured up by J.J. It’s something that’s existed for years, some old school SW nonsense. I was instantly on board because of that. Something people need to realize: the Sith was broken in this movie. It was trying to return, but the Rule of Two had been broken by Anakin Skywalker. The remnant of Palpatine was devoid of strength until he claimed the life Force of Ben and Rey. So Rey putting an end to him and the remaining Sith remnants wasn’t her bringing balance to the Force, it was her doing what Ben couldn’t do: finishing what Anakin started. She was, in essence, scrubbing the ash and soot from the scene of the fire Anakin started and subsequently put out. It honestly made me feel like what Anakin did was respected and solidified. All Rey did was put an end to the dying tendrils of the dark trying to rise. It’s beautiful...and adding Anakin asking her to bring balance as he did was icing on the cake.

All in all, I loved this movie. It hit all the notes I was hoping for and I left at peace. I don’t understand the vitriol, but I welcome discussion. There ya have it.

[inhale-fandoms-exhale-asdfghjkl]

Starkid Musicals Ranked

So I know I've done this before but it was quite a while ago and Black Friday has come out now so naturally I've had some changes in opinion. Also I've got nothing else better to do in self-isolation and I had plenty of time so i thought why the hell not. 

I’m sorry for the fact that this post drags on a bit. I just really love Starkid if that’s not already obvious. Please keep in mind I wrote this at 3am so if it’s riddled with spelling errors or doesn't make sense, please bear with me.

This time I wanted to be really thorough in how i ranked the shows so i went through a few processes. 

First I ranked each of the shows based on the writing, music, production, humour, costumes and the cast’s performances (which is really just criteria that makes a show great for me personally). For each category i gave them a score out of 10 which I then added up and each show what given a score out of 60. 

The results of this were:

Hmb (53/60)

AVPS, Starship, Twisted (52/60)

AVPM & Black Friday (47/60)

The Trail to Oregon (46/60)

TGWDLM (45/60)

AVPSY & ANI (44/60)

MAMD (37/60)

Firebringer (35/60)

To be honest, i was quite surprised by some of these scores. Some shows were way higher or lower than i though they’d be but some were pretty accurate. However, i didn’t think these scores alone really reflected my actual personal opinions of these shows as a whole. There were a few shows with the same scores so I tried to figure out a way to kind of rank them by personal taste while still using the scores. Really all I did was I ranked the ones with tied scores.

HMB

Twisted

Starship

AVPS

AVPM

Black Friday

The Trail to Oregon

TGWDLM

AVPSY

ANI

MAMD

Firebringer

Now I definitely thought this list was much more accurate but I still felt a few shows were out of place. In particular, HMB. A good portion of the reason of why it got such a high score is purely for my love of the costumes. Therefore, I pretty much abandoned all the previous work I did and then just listed them based on my personal enjoyment of each show which actually isn’t too different. Because at the end of the day, no matter how high I score a specific criteria for a show, that doesn’t necessarily mean I enjoy other aspects of the show equally.

For each show, I go into a pretty lengthy description of things I love about the show, commenting on the writing, music, production, humour, costumes and the cast’s performances. I also give provide an MVP for each show which is just a specific cast member or two’s performances that I particularly like to or stood out to me. I also give my favourite song and scene of each show. 

Also this is just MY personal ranking of each show based on things that I do or don’t enjoy about them. I absolutely love every single one of these shows, don’t confuse me being a little critical with some of them as hate or disrespect. Please understand that these are my opinions, which I am allowed to have just like you and I ask you to respect them even if you disagree just like I would respect yours. 

So without further ado, this is my final ranking of Starkid’s musicals:

1. Twisted

In my eyes, this show is quite possibly the closest thing you will ever get to perfection. Whether it’s the soundtrack (BLESS YOU AJ HOLMES AND YOUR RIDICULOUSLY AMAZING SONGWRITING SKILLS) or the acting (DAMN YOU DYLAN SAUNDERS FOR MAKING ME CRY SO MUCH, IT’S REALLY NOT FAIR) or just Nick and Matt’s writing which let’s be honest is always amazing. This show perfectly balances both the comedy and dramatic elements of the story, which if I’m being truly critical, not every Starkid show does. It’s a ridiculously beautiful, heart-warming show but it never takes itself too seriously. It has this amazing ability to have you both laughing and crying at the same time. Aladdin is one of my favourite Disney movies and I have to say it’s an amazing adaptation, it’s legitimately better than Disney’s live action remake in my opinion. Like all of their adaptation/parody shows, Starkid is able to stay true to the original text while also making it their own which I think is what make their shows so unique and refreshing.

MVP: I mean I gotta go with Dylan Saunders. I know it’s an obvious choice but how can I not. I mean I can’t believe it took them five years before they have Dylan a lead role because let’s be honest he’s amazing and he absolutely nailed this fucking role. Not only does he perfect every single one of those heart wrenching monologues/scenes but like his comedic timing is perfect. But Jeff, Joe and Rachael are definitely honourable mentions.

Favourite Song: IF I BELIEVED. If you don’t believe this is the best song on the soundtrack then you can bloody fight me, alright. I’m getting emotional just thinking about this song, just imagine when I listen to it or worse, when I watch the scene.

Favourite scene: I really love the entirety of Twisted with all the other Disney villains but literally any scene with Achmed is very fun to watch.

2. Starship

So I explained this in my original ranking post but I’m going to say it again. This show holds an extremely special place in my heart. It was the first Starkid show I watched after initially joining the fandom through AVPM and AVPS. I honestly couldn’t tell you what my favourite thing about this show is or why I love it so much, I just do. This show was my favourite show (until Twisted was released) and I would literally watch it over and over again. I love the music, I love the writing, and I love every single one of the cast’s performances. I legit have almost close to zero critiques on this show. It’s one of Starkid’s best written and produced productions (I mean the set, the puppets, everything was on point). This is such a hilarious show with some of Starkid’s best and most iconic jokes and yet it still manages to be such a beautiful and inspiring show.

With all this being said, this show is so criminally underrated and I really do not understand why but I guess everyone’s got their own tastes and all but okay. You do you.

Also, just gonna go off on a tangent for a bit. This musical is what made me fall in love with the beautiful, amazing, talented Dylan Saunders. I could not believe that the same man could play the adorable and very loveable cutie pie that is Tootsie Noodles/Mega-Girl and the hauntingly charismatic Pincer who is by the way one of Starkid’s best villains. Yes I said it. Nonetheless 12 –year-old me was absolutely flabbergasted by this man’s talented and really had no choice but to fall in love with him. Apart from Twisted, this is most definitely Dylan’s best performance (Not that he has any bad ones. Let’s be honest, that man is perfect). Legit, I challenge anyone to try watch this musical and not fall in love with him. It’s literally impossible.

MVP: I don’t think I could pick just one, I mean they’re all so amazing. I’d probably have to go with Joey. I think Bug was a great character for him and really showcased his abilities, which have just grown exponentially over the years. It was great seeing him play a more serious role rather than his previously more comedic roles (Ron and Joey) while also getting to goof off a little bit. It’s so fun to watch him in this and I really don’t think he gets enough appreciation for this role. Oh and also Meredith is amazing in Starship. I absolutely love her as Mega-Girl and it’s my favourite role of hers.

Favourite song: The Way I Do. Bro the chemistry between Meredith and Dylan is off the charts and this song just shows it. I love everything about this song. It’s so beautiful, I can’t even. Also not too be too like generic but Kick it up a Notch is phenomenal and one of Darren’s best. Actually this show’s whole soundtrack is probably my favourite of the ones that Darren wrote.

Favourite scene: I don’t think I have a favourite but I love the scene with Junior and Mega-Girl where he calls her a toaster and all that. Some of Brian’s best acting and he and Meredith’s chemistry really is really present here. It’s not often you get to see these two play opposite each other so it’s fun and interesting to watch.

3. A Very Potter Sequel

As a major Harry Potter fan, it’s only natural that I hold the Potter series with the highest regard. Despite the fact that this show is a parody by a bunch of college kids, it literally is a better adaptation than a whole eight-part, multi-million budget film series and that’s saying something. How the hell did Nick and Matt write every single one of these characters more accurately and consistently than professional screenwriters and at times, JK Rowling herself? It’s very rare that you ever hear me say that a sequel (I guess it’s technically a prequel) is better than the original but here we are. Don’t get me wrong, AVPM is iconic™ but this show just somehow improved what AVPM already perfected. The plot was much more fleshed out and every single character was written so perfectly and also everybody was casted perfectly. If you follow me you probably know of my love for Remus Lupin and while his character is AVPS is written absolutely ridiculously, it is one of my favourite things about the show. In this show Remus is written to be like this total mess of a person, who is like homeless and just walks around the school half naked, covered in blood and forces a child to eat a dead deer and is just drunk all time and yet I can just totally accept it. Like if the movies had written Remus like this I’d be like “hmm no” but when Brian Holden does it I’m like “um yes this is amazing”. This is quite possibly Starkid’s funniest show, I literally cry of laughter EVERY TIME. Honestly this show is comedic gold for any Harry Potter fan. From anything that comes of Lupin’s mouth or the entirety of Umbridge’s character to Lucius’s dancing.

This being said, I can totally understand why anyone wouldn’t like this or the other Potter shows as much as the others or not think it’s funny if they’re not a fan as most of the humour is based on knowledge of the original series and obviously this for the other parody shows like HMB or ANI. Nonetheless I still think anybody could enjoy this show and its humour as Starkid pretty much has the same sense of humour running throughout most if not all of their shows.

MVP: Brian Holden. I don’t think I need to explain again. But also Tyler Brunsman and Joe Walker are scene-stealers too. Also Corey Dorris as Yaxley in this show is peak comedy.

Favourite song and scene: okay so these kind of go together for me for this show. The whole scene with Those Voices brings me to tears every time. I fucking love the whole marauders era so them showing Sirius Black seeing James and Lily in the Mirror of Erised is more than my heart can take. Nick and Darren in this scene is just *chef’s kiss* and then you add Brian Rosenthal harmonising in the background, well it’s enough to make any girl break and you bet it does every time.

4. Holy Musical B@man!

Oh my god this is just such a fun show and if it was a person, I would die for it. When I first watched this, I wasn’t that big of a DC fan at the time so I couldn’t fully appreciate it for what it was. It’s actually so amazing and it’s a real shame that it sometimes gets overlooked. Nick Gage’s song writing is actually amazing and I really love this soundtrack. I mean I literally get chills every time I listen to the end of Dark, Sad, Lonely Knight. You know which part I’m talking about.

Also can we talk about the costumes for this show? June really fucking outdid herself with this show, they are literally the best costumes out of the whole Starkid canon and you cannot tell me otherwise. Not only did she nail like the classic comic book character costumes like Batman and Superman, etc. while also making them her own but she also created completely original and amazing costumes like Sweet Tooth and Candy. I wish I had even a small percentage of that talent and artistic ability. Anyway this show is so hilarious and also so emotional at the same time it’s not even fair. I’m not a big fan of Batman or Robin and yet this show almost has me changing my mind. And honestly, Nick Lang deserves the fucking world, I absolutely love watching him act and it’s unfortunate he doesn’t do it a lot because he’s amazing.

MVP: Joe Walker. Don’t get me wrong, I love watching Joe play all of his over-the-top comedic roles but I particularly love watching him play a slightly more serious role like this, it’s really refreshing and I really think he knocked it out of the park. Also Jeff Blim as Sweet Tooth is one of my favourite Starkid characters. No joke, 12-year-old me was OBSESSED.

Favourite song: either Dark, Sad, Lonely Knight or Rogues are We.

Favourite Scene:  the whole To Be a Man scene.

“Batman or should I say Butthead”

“Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh”.

If that’s not comedic gold I don’t know what is.

5. A Very Potter Musical

This show is and always will be Starkid’s most iconic show. I think it says a lot that a silly parody musical put on by a group of college students has been able to inspire a whole decade’s worth of beautiful, creative, crazy works of art which only continues to grow. This show was never meant to become what it did but how lucky and fortunate are we all that it did. I am so grateful that 8-9 (tbh I can’t even remember anymore) years ago I decided to watch a silly musical about Harry Potter because I cannot imagine my life without Starkid in it. No this show might not have the best set or props or costumes or sound/video quality (it was 2009 guys, give them a break) but it is absolutely amazing in every single way and that’s all I’m going to say.

MVP: fucking everyone. I mean I’m around the same age they were when they started all of this and I can’t even imagine being able to create something even remotely as creative and wonderful or having any kind of success as close to that any time soon.

Favourite song: I feel like I should go for a classic like Not Alone but I’m not gonna lie I’m a real sucker for Missing You.

Favourite scene: oh man I don’t know the whole show is so iconic. I don’t know how I can pick just one.

6. Black Friday

I’m sure some people would be surprised that this show would be so high on this list for a number of reasons. Mostly due to the fact that I’ve been known to be quite fond of, and pretty biased towards some of Starkid’s older shows. But I think that’s just because I’m really nostalgic for how the fandom was back 8 years ago when I joined. And also when I joined the fandom, HMB was like our TGWDLM. It was the newest show out and everyone was talking about it. And also this is the show I have been rewatching the most lately and vie literally had the album on repeat for the last month.

A lot of people don’t really like the new direction that Starkid has taken with this show and honestly I don’t get it. Yes, it’s considerably darker than their other shows and while they classify it as a horror-comedy, it doesn’t really have a whole lot of comedy. But in my opinion, I think that’s what makes the show so great. The main focus of this show is the characters – their pain, their desires, their struggles and I think any excess of comedy would just take away from what’s really important. I really love watching Starkid delve into this new kind of story-telling and I think they’re doing an amazing job with this Hatchetfield series. I think this show did such a great show of introducing us to all the new characters, developing their arcs and really establishing their role within the world of Hatchetfield while simultaneously blending them perfectly with the already established characters from TGWDLM. What I really like about this show and even TGWDLM is how the characters are written. They feel so real not as cartoonish as some of the characters in Starkid’s previous shows which are why the audience can really relate to these characters.

Also this editing and cinematography of this show is fucking amazing and unlike anything else we’ve gotten from Starkid over the years. The choreography is outstanding and the musical is phenomenal. This is easily Jeff Blim’s best work and I have a feeling some people might disagree with me on that. The music in this show is so beautifully intricate and the lyrics have so much depth and emotion which I just feel like TGWDLM lacks. I know some people have been a bit offstandish about the singing in this show and I guess I’d have to agree. The live vocals on the youtube version do seem a bit off but I just suspect some cast members may have been sick or maybe they were just having an off day (it happens guys, even to professionals). Also I love the additions of some new members to Starkids, everyone was absolutely great in this show. For some of these actors, the characters they played were completely opposite to roles that they’ve played in the past but they all nailed it – Joey, Jon, Lauren. My only complaint in terms of casting is that I wish they gave Jaime more, while she is often praised for her singing skills (rightfully so), she often gets overlooked in her acting abilities and it would be great to see her play a bigger role in the next show.

Also I get it, Santa Claus is going to High School is very hilarious and great but please don’t make it another Workin’ Boys thing. Don’t go demanding Starkid to make a short film for this too, let them focus on their other bigger and better projects, please.

MVP: this show had some of my favourite performances from many Starkids but if I had to say someone who particularly stood out to me it’s definitely Kim. Before Black Friday, I will admit I hadn’t really seen anything with Kim in it so this was a great surprise for me. I am literally in love with her voice; it’s one of the most beautiful things in this world.

Favourite song: Take Me Back. Dylan and Kim are just amazing in this song I can’t even explain how much I love it. I’m also a major fan of Feast or Famine and If I Fail You. Ooh and Made in America.

Favourite Scene: I really love the scene with Tom and Becky in the movie theatre but I also really love the whole What Do You Say scene, I think it’s hilarious. But I think my favourite is with the whole Black and White scene with the President, Wiggly and Wiley. One of Joey’s best performances in my opinion.

7. The Trail to Oregon

So on my last list, this show was considerably higher but, on my recent rewatch of the AVPM shows and HMB, I’ve realised how much I really love those shows and unfortunately TTO had to be downgraded. Don’t get me wrong, I still very much love this show. It’s one of the most fun shows to watch and has me smiling the whole time without fail. In saying this, this show also does an amazing job of adding in these beautiful emotional dramatic scenes that brings the audience to tears. At the end of the day, this show really is just about family and how important it is to love and appreciate them no matter how insane they are or how much they annoy you. I know Jeff is really beloved in the fandom but I still don’t think he gets enough appreciation for how good of a writer (both script and song writing) he is, as well as an actor. This show is so unexpectedly beautiful and I’m really grateful for Jeff creating this story.

I don’t really think this show gets enough credit for how good its production actually is considering it only has six cast members. This show is proof of how diverse, creative and talented all these actors really are. It’s such a different concept from their other shows and I think they executed it so well.

MVP: Joey absolutely smashed it, I’m sure it’s not easy having to play all these different characters and literally change between them in a matter of seconds while giving each of them their own separate, unique identities. Another performer I got to give credit to in this show is Rachael, When the World’s at Stake is an amazing performance and Corey is so funny to watch in this show. Grandpa is probably my favourite character as well as the son.

Favourite song: probably When the World’s at Stake but also Independence. I cannot possibly estimate how much time I spent trying to learn those lyrics and sing it at that speed and get it right but I finally got there.

Favourite scene: the whole scene when the Grandpa, Son and Daughter are hunting makes me laugh every time, it’s so funny. But there’s something about that scene with McDoon and Cletus that ends with them riding on the horse together that makes me crack up.

8. The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals

Okay so I know the last time I did this, TGWDLM was like no 5 or 6 but like it’s been like a year and a half and a lot of my opinions on this show have changed. I’m also aware that by the time the next Starkid show is out I’ll probably also have changed my mind about Black Friday but who knows. I am eternally grateful to this show for introducing me to the amazing Jon Matteson. In a matter of 2 hours, this man somehow became one of my favourite human beings in the world. His portrayal as Paul is just, I don’t even know but something about it just sticks with me and I absolutely love it. This concept of this show is actually so amazing and you really gotta give the Lang’s credit for being able to come up with stuff like this. A lot of the beauty of the show is that it seems like such a simple concept but if you really think about the implications, you can actually understand why it’s so terrifying. Production-wise, this show isn’t anything fancy in terms of set, costumes props, etc. But the lighting design is amaaaaaazinggggggg!

The soundtrack for this show is pretty great but if you’re comparing it to Starkid’s other scores, it’s not the best. I said it before; the music in this just lacks the depth and emotion that is so heavily prominent in the Black Friday score.

MVP: Jon Matteson for the reasons above. And also Joey’s monologue as Ted to Bill gives me chills every time.

Favourite song: I feel like as the show goes on the songs do tend to get more personal, detailed and emotional which I why I probably favour those over many of the songs in act one. Let it Out and Inevitable are two songs in particular that I love and definitely stand out to me.

Favourite scene: the whole Let it Out scene with Jon trying to resist the apotheosis. And also Lauren’s acting at the end of Inevitable is amazing. Her running around the stage, distressed is both so horrifying but also absolutely hilarious.

9. Me and My Dick

I mean I guess I understand why a lot of people don’t like this show but that doesn’t mean I can forgive the fact that it’s so underrated. Yeah the humour is a bit crude and I get that’s not everyone’s thing but literally this show is two and a half hours of pure golden comedy. Honestly, who thought a show about high school kids and their walking and talking genitalia could be one of the most wholesome and heart-warming things in the world. I don’t think anyone other than Starkid could pull of something like this which honestly says so much about them. These people come up with some of the most craziest, outrageous stuff and somehow turn them into beautiful, amazing works of art.

The soundtrack for this show is so freaking good man. And AJ Holmes is literally one of the most amazing and talented people on this earth. How the fuck does he write such good music? I need to know, it’s really not fair. And for all those people who complain that it took Corey Dorris ten years to get a solo, I urge you to simply watch MAMD.

This show doesn’t have the best production and the sound quality is not great but you know what? Fuck you. Because the acting is this show outshines all of that. The energy each of the performers has in this show is crazy and they are all extremely talented. Literally AJ as Joey’s heart is next fucking level. And Arielle is criminally underrated for her role in this. And Nick Strauss is a comedy king. I’ve said it before and will say it again; The Old Snatch and Flopsy are the most iconic duo.

MVP: AJ and Nick. Like I said. Next level and iconic™.

Favourite song: Listen to your heart. But also Even Though. And Finale is a certified bop.

Favourite scene: I love the scene with Dick and Flopsy but I don’t know if it’s my favourite. But one of my favourite quotes is when Dick is talking to Joey about Miss Cooter’s hair and Joey’s delivery of “on her vagina?” cracks me up every time. And honestly there’s not a lot that can beat Brian during Gotta Find His Dick just intensely repeating “Someone tell him where his dick is”. It makes me laugh so hard I really don’t know why.

10. A Very Potter Senior Year

Alright so let me take you back to 2012. I remember the day they posted the video announcing they were not only making another Harry Potter show but that they were bringing back almost every Starkid member. It was actually such a weird time for the fandom because it really did seem like this show was going to be the end of Starkid. When you watch the show, you can see that the actors are not only saying goodbye to Harry Potter and the characters that they had been playing for the last 3 years but also they were saying goodbye to each other. It was heartbreaking to watch then and it still is now 8 years later. 2012 me was absolutely devastated because I had only just discovered this fandom and I thought I would already have to say goodbye to something that become so special to me in such a short amount of time. Luckily for us all this was not the end of Starkid.

This show really holds a special place in my heart, for so many reasons. First off, it was the first Starkid show that I got to watch as it premiered. Second, I was still grieving the end of the Harry Potter movies and these musicals had kind of replaced that for me but then this was ending too. And third, it really just is the most perfectly executed ending to the AVP series.

This show makes me both laugh and then cry and then laugh again and then cry and laugh at the same time. In my opinion, it is one of the best written Starkid shows, on par with the other Potter shows and I think the only reason why it gets overlooked is the fact that it’s a stage reading rather than a proper production. But you know what, considering this show was literally put together in such a short amount of time and the actors literally had a few days’ worth of preparation, they still managed to put on an amazing show. I wholeheartedly believe that if this show had been a proper production, it would be pretty fucking perfect. The soundtrack for this show is probably the best out of all the Potter shows for me. Every one of these songs is a bop and I love them all so much.

Long story short, people need to stop sleeping on AVPSY and appreciate it more.

MVP: Joey Richter. I don’t even need to explain. Just watch Act 2 Part 11. Actually him in the entirety of Act 2. And also that delivery of “losers like us that’s who” just makes me cry every time. How did Starkid portray Ron more accurately in these musicals that WB did?

Favourite song: it’s a tie between I Was and I’m Just a Sidekick.

Favourite scene: The whole scene with the resurrection stone and Everything Ends. Absolute Perfection.

11. ANI

Like the Harry Potter shows, I can understand why people don’t like this show. If youre not a fan of the original text, you probably won’t like the comedy or understand the entire plot or whatever. And honestly that’s the only reason I put this show so low. I have very very little knowledge of Star Wars so pretty much all of the jokes and that go right over my head. However, I still find it very enjoyable to watch and most of that probably has to be credited towards the fact that it has a killer soundtrack and a pretty perfect cast. Also like I said with HMB, I love the rare occasion that we get to see Nick perform. This soundtrack, oh my god, it’s so amazing. Why do people keep overlooking it? I get that it’s different because it’s not the character’s singing it but like that choreography though. Clark Baxtresser has one of the most beautiful voices so you’ll never hear me complaining about a whole score of pretty much just his voice. But that’s just me. I hate how much hate I see for this show. Everyone worked extremely hard on this show, particularly Nick and Matt who wrote the whole thing and the lack of appreciation for it is horrible to see. It’s actually such a fun show, and you can tell the cast had so much fun doing this show because their energy is so great in this.

MVP: Nick Lang. Again, he deserves the world. And Chris Allen is incredible in every role he does but particularly this.

Favourite song: With My Own Eyes and Long Ago and Far Away. I just really love the vocals.

Favourite scene: Nick’s scene as Obi-Wan.

12. Firebringer

CoNtRaVeRsIaL oPiNiOn  but sorry but I don’t like Firebringer. It’s not that I hate it. I’m just not really fan of it or its comedy – mostly because I don’t think it has any. I’ve seen people say that Twisted or MAMD rely too much on using swearing/ profanities for humour but honestly I think that’s more of the case for this show. That’s not to say that there’s not things I don’t like about it. Apart from HMB, this show probably has some of the best costumes. I can’t really fault Nick and Matt’s writing too much but I have to say this is some of their weakest work. I don’t think the plot as a whole is bad I just think there’s parts that don’t work for me or just don’t feel right. And I’m not really a fan of the characters and their development. I never thought I’d ever be able to say that I dislike any role of Meredith’s but honestly I find her character really unlikeable and I know people might attack me for that but it’s just my opinion. I like Zazzalil, I think Lauren did a great job, as always but I don’t know I just don’t think there’s any particular character or performance that really stands out for me in this show. If I’m being completely honest, I have only been able to watch the full run of this show twice, maybe three times and it has been a while since the last time I watched it but if I’m being honest I don’t see myself sitting down to watch it again any time soon. One thing I can definitely praise this show on is the female and LGBTQ+ representation, although that should go unsaid but even in 2020, seeing positive representations of female, LGBTQ+ or POC in media is still somehow refreshing and surprising and ain’t that just a little bit sad?. Another thing I can praise this show on is the music, I actually quite enjoy majority of the soundtrack.

MVP: Both of the Lauren’s. Lauren Lopez because she’s amazing in everything but especially in this, I’m so happy she finally got a lead role, she deserved it 100%. And Lauren Walker is just fucking hilarious. Why hasn’t she been in another Starkid show since?

Favourite song: probs climate change

Favourite scene: like I said, there’s really not a lot that stands out to me in this show so I really don’t know what to pick.

[shemakesmusic-uk]

After releasing her film Black Is King as a Disney+ exclusive a few weeks ago, Beyoncé has shared the visual 'Brown Skin Girl' on YouTube. Featuring SAINt JHN, WizKid, and daughter Blue Ivy, the clip features appearances by former bandmate Kelly Rowland, Noami Campell, Lupita Nyong’o, and more. The video coincided with a special message the star shared with Good Morning America. "It was so important to me in 'Brown Skin Girl' that we represented all different shades of brown," Beyoncé said of the video, crediting director Jenn Nkiru with the concept. "It was important that we are all in this together and we're all celebrating each other." [via The FADER]

Eivør releases a new single and video, ‘Let It Come’, the latest lifted from her forthcoming album Segl. The transportive new clip - filmed in Iceland - is a prequel to the video for previous single release ‘Sleep On It’, which Eivør released last month. Both videos are directed by Einar Egils and feature actor Tómas Lemarquis (Blade Runner 2049, X-Men: Apocalypse). Speaking about ‘Let It Come’, Eivør says; "It’s one of those songs that took many shapes before it reached its final destination and I guess the opening line pretty much explains it all: “Sometimes I overthink the most simple things”. This song is a follow up to my previous single 'Sleep On It' - whilst that was about insomnia and making difficult choices, 'Let It Come' is about coming out at the other end of this struggle, embracing the uncertainties you might find yourself in and finding the courage to believe that something good will come your way." Of the interplay between the two music videos he has created for Eivør, director Einar Eglis adds; "'Let It Come' is a prequel to the end of the world that was portrayed in the ‘Sleep On It’ video. Eivør has been stuck in a loop of uncertainty for years, until she sees a vision that will end everything as we know it, and she is the key towards redemption. She must face these facts and embrace the golden idol she is to become."

The gentle, hypnotic sway of 'god's chariots' is central to MaryLou Mayniel's first full-length project Galore. Her catalogue of experimental electronica is impressive whichever way you look at it. Creating everything from video game soundtracks to an EP sampling the likes of Miley Cyrus and Carly Rae Jepsen to vast instrumental odysseys and empowering pop anthems, Mayniel can turn her hand to almost anything. 'god's chariots' is at the helm of the singer-songwriter's latest drop of new music. “It’s a fantasy, a place you’re in to escape reality, but it’s also about being so lonely that you kind of lose your mind,” explains Manyiel. A fragment of her forthcoming debut full-length project 'god's chariots' is just one piece of the ever-expanding story which Oklou shares on Galore. With additional tracks 'nightmare' and 'rosebud', also out n ow, we get to piece more of Galore's narrative of emotional rebirth together. Already an illuminating experience with its first six songs out in the world, soon you'll be able to witness Manyiel's first masterpiece in all its glory when the rest of the project is released next month. [via Line Of Best Fit]

Madeline Kenney has shared the visual for her Sucker's Lunch album track 'Cut the Real'. 'Cut the Real' is one of the most lyrically confrontational tracks on Kenney's new album Sucker's Lunch. Kenney has unveiled the accompanying self-directed visual filmed in Oakland that sees her dressed in a Rococo style suit and makeup, giving a heartfelt performance of the song's fierce lyrics. Madeline Kenney: "I wrote 'Cut the Real' when I was feeling particularly insane / depressed /"out of my mind" as I was starting a new relationship. I really struggle with self confidence and found myself spiraling out into deep holes of self-loathing -- even though I knew what was going on I couldn't stop that cycle. The concept was inspired by the aesthetic choices in recent Aldous Harding videos as well as old Annie Lennox videos. I wanted to put on a gender-neutral Rococo outfit and just really allow myself to ham it up, and occupy that same spinning-out headspace as I was in while writing the song." [via Line Of Best Fit]

Four years after she released her solo debut Slugger, Speedy Ortiz leader Sadie Dupuis is getting ready to release Haunted Painting, the second album released under her Sad13 alias. The album comes out next month, and  now we get another new song, and it’s got a pretty great music video attached. The new Sad13 track is called 'Hysterical,' and it’s a zippy synthpop track with layered lyrics: “I wanna see you disappear and laugh like I don’t need permission.” In a press release, Dupuis says that the song is about “unfunny comedians [who] love to argue that ‘PC culture’ destroys comedy.” Dupuis plays almost all the instruments herself. The video, directed by Kate Banford and Jamie Loftus, features Dupuis alongside comedy-world mainstays like Loftus, Mitra Jouhari, and Demi Adejuyigbe. Like the new horror movie Host, the whole thing takes place on a computer screen, and it’s all about what happens when a ghost shows up in a Zoom party and kills everyone. [via Stereogum]

When Cross Record’s Emily Cross and Dan Duszynski teamed up with Shearwater’s Jonathan Meiburg to form Loma, it seemed like it might be one-off endeavor. But then last month we got news that they’d be following their 2017 debut with a new album, Don’t Shy Away. Along with the announcement, they shared a stunning new track called 'Ocotillo'. Today, they’re back with another one.  The latest preview of Don’t Shy Away arrives in the form of 'Half Silences,' which the band shared an earlier iteration of last year. 'Half Silences' was the first song we recorded for Don’t Shy Away, and we kept tinkering with it after we soft-released an early version last year,” Meiburg explained in a statement. “When you start making a record, you don’t know which songs will make the cut — but this one always seemed to belong, and we wanted to give the final mix (and its DIY video) a proper debut. People have asked if the fireworks are CGI. They aren’t.” 'Ocotillo' was an almost foreboding song, cresting into horn arrangements that teetered on the brink of chaos. In comparison, 'Half Silences' is a dreamier and hazier composition. But in either form, Loma are making some gorgeous, otherworldly music. [via Stereogum]

Back in June, the Bristol songwriter Fenne Lily announced her sophomore album, BREACH. So far we’ve heard advance singles 'Alapathy' and 'Berlin,' and today she’s back with another one. Lily’s latest is called 'Solipsism.' Here’s what she had to say about it: "A lot of situations make me uncomfortable — some parties, most dates, every time I’m stoned in the supermarket. 'Solipsism' is a song about being comfortable with being uncomfortable and the freedom that comes with that. If you feel weird for long enough it becomes normal, and feeling anything is better than feeling nothing. I wanted this video to be a reflection of the scary thought that I’ll have to live with myself forever. It’s surreal to realize you’ll never live apart from someone you sometimes hate. Dad, if you’re reading this you killed it as shopper number 2." The song comes with a video directed by Tom Clover with the non-profit Film Co. “I asked Fenne what products she wanted to be and then worked backwards from there with the illustrators,” Clover explained. “Most of the references came from Asian Supermarket packaging — they are way more interesting. The most important thing was making sure that it reflected upon Fenne’s personality — there’s a bunch of details you might miss on the first watch!” [via Stereogum]

About two weeks ago Oceanator shared 'Heartbeat,' the third and final single from their upcoming full length debut, Things I Never Said and now it has a video. The highly anticipated album via Plastic Miracles captures Elise Okusami’s songwriting at it’s best, a strong effort that sits between pop, rock, fuzzy punk, and alternative radio gold. The video, directed by David Combs and Ben Epstein, is every bit as delightful as the song itself, opening with the same magnetic energy as we find Okusami seemingly lost and looking for companionship. She finds it eventually in the form of herself, quite literally, as she joins herself at a bus stop, and then again in a field, with ten of more copies, al rocking out, all enjoying each other’s company. There’s a brilliant barbershop quartet moment, cool animation, and enough smiles to keep you going throughout your day. Speaking about the song, Okusami shared: “This song is loosely about having a crush, and both the grounding feeling and the anxiety that feeling brings. We recorded it all together like a live performance, and then I went back and added the lead guitars and the vocals. Guitar and vocals by me, bass Eva Lawitts (they), drums Aaron Silberstein (he)." [via Post Trash]

Ontario-based project Falcon Jane – the moniker for primary songwriter of the group, Sara May – have released their soaring new single, ‘The Other Moon’ via Pittsburgh-based label, Darling Recordings – you can watch the new video that comes co-directed by May and Dominique van Olm above. ‘The Other Moon’, which is lifted from a larger body of material set to come from Sara May further down the line, finds the artist exploring deeply sentimental and personal themes, from death to memory, and the miscommunication that can take place between generations. May has a penchant for unpacking these emotions in succinct and comprehensible forms, making something so personal and idiosyncratic to her feel so familiar to the rest of us. Much of May’s forthcoming work found its source of inspiration in early 2019 when her songwriting synched up with a string of deaths that occurred in her immediate family; ‘The Other Moon’ pays a touching testament to her Nonna with May lacing the track’s stark honesty with swooning guitar and her enchanting vocal palette, a sound that co-director, van Olm visualized as May’s DIY journey through space. Speaking about the new track, May says: “‘The Other Moon’ is a letter and tribute to my late Nonna whose death inspired me to start recording this album. Despite being from two completely different generations, and speaking two different languages, my Nonna and I had a very special connection. We understood each other and cared about each other, even if we couldn’t find the words to express it. My Nonna would always cheekily joke about her own death, and through her broken English, she claimed that when she died she’d be going to “The Other Moon”. This song is not a story about a happy-go-lucky relationship between grandmother and granddaughter,” May continues. “It accurately depicts the contrasting dynamic of a very loving friendship mixed with a lifelong trauma-ridden miscommunication. The big hole in my heart, the black cloud over our love. This song feels like the message I always wanted to send to her; pushing through the darkness to find the deep love we shared and continue to share now.”

Baby Queen has released her third track 'Medicine' with a fab new video. The follow-up to ‘Buzzkill', it arrives ahead of her debut EP later this year. "It's about a tangle of mental health and navigating your way through this world,” Bella says of the song, “whilst being so unhappy and equally disillusioned with the cyber landscape that we are forced to live inside, and the different ways people might numb themselves, or try to find a place where they can exist in amongst all of this fucking chaos." [via Dork]

Oklahoma-born, LA-based electro-pop songstress Mothica has released her debut album Blue Hour, accompanied by the official music video for her single 'VICES.' The album was written over the course of a few months, starting with one of the worst moments of Mothica’s life: a psych ward stay for self-harm and ends with a song about never wanting to feel the “crash” of drugs ever again. “Following that incident, I sought therapy and wrote lyrics detailing my journey into sobriety. I am now 13 months sober at the time of writing this, and have never been in a better place emotionally.” With her new album Blue Hour, she chronicles her deep struggle with addiction + mental health and the process of getting sober. “Someone told me that every artist has their ‘getting sober album’ eventually,” she explains. “I find it ironic that my debut album is my ‘getting sober’ album, because I think that’s indicative of how quickly I was forced to grow up."

FKA twigs has always made incredible music videos, and 'sad day' ranks right up there with her best. For this clip, twigs worked with the director Hiro Murai, one of the best music-video directors to emerge in the last decade. Murai has mostly moved on from music videos in recent years. Instead, he’s directed episodes of Atlanta and Barry, two of the best shows on TV, as well as Donald Glover’s Amazon short film Guava Island and the forthcoming apocalyptic miniseries Station Eleven. The 'sad day' video is Murai’s first clip since he made the instantly iconic 'This Is America' with Donald Glover in 2018. I don’t want to give away much of the 'sad day' video, which starts out in a dingy takeout spot and transforms into a surreal dream-logic head trip. But you should know that twigs only made this video after spending three years studying martial arts at the Shaolin Wushu Center, and you can tell. A dancer named Teake, who twigs discovered via social media, co-stars. [via Stereogum]

The latest of Silly Boy Blue's ongoing build is 'Hi, It's Me Again,' a song she describes as the "too long text I didn't want to send at 3 AM to my ex." Like the rumination behind a loaded, emotional message to a former lover, she adds that it took months to assemble the words in her head but only one night to write out the lyrics. "I needed to write a song about this, because it's a very special place between the hate and the void during a breakup." With an almost lullaby melody, the spacey tune slowly builds into the ultimate warning: "You'll be the one I always haunt," Silly Boy Blue sings, her voice beautifully layered and atmospheric. All her thoughts throughout the song are interlaced with the relatable, somewhat insecure backpedal, "I'm sorry," capturing the headspace "just before resilience," as she describes. It's "when you start to understand the breakup, but you still have so many questions popping in your head." In the 'Hi, It's Me Again' video, Silly Boy Blue says she "needed to show the different parts" of her identity. "Some of them are masculine, some of them are feminine, some of them seem confident, some seem shy, some seem to suffocate, some stand proudly." Much like the nuanced feelings during a breakup, she expresses without binaries — and especially through fashion, as she opens the clip in only an oversized men's button-down. Scenes in the new visual roll by like memories or fleeting emotions, ranging from subdued drama to full on meltdowns. At one point, she's shown with a plastic bag pulled over her head to capture the most extreme feelings of dread, juxtaposed against a more innocent shot of Silly Boy Blue in all white with two lone tear drops fixated on her cheek. The artist also loaded in "important" references to her favorite movies, from the Titanic's necklace to The Rocky Horror Picture Show's big mouth. [via PAPER]

Dream Nails have released a video for their new single, 'This Is The Summer'. It's a song from their new Tarek Musa of Spring King-produced, self-titled record out now via Alcopop!. “[It's] a song about how our climate is breaking down irreversibly,” says singer Janey Starling. “Colonial capitalism, waged by UK governments and corporations for centuries, has ravaged our earth. “We need to be urgently fighting for migrant rights so the UK welcomes climate refugees displaced by countries hit by extreme weather. We must demand transparency from oil companies who relentlessly put profit before people, even as the world burns." Guitarist Anya Pearson adds: “We wrote ‘This Is The Summer’ in the heatwave of 2018, recorded it in another heatwave in 2019 and now we are releasing it in yet another heatwave! Our video for the track shows how the current pandemic, white supremacy and climate change are not separate issues but interlinked. The song is about the brazen complacency of getting drunk and catching a tan in the park while the world burns.” [via Dork]

BBC Sound Of 2020 winner Celeste has shared her new single 'Little Runaway'. Out now, the single is about a crisis of faith, and features a towering vocal from the London artist. A song about succumbing to the depths before emerging renewed, 'Little Runaway' began as a jazz sample, before taking on a life of its own. Celeste says... “‘Little Runaway’ is a song about losing your faith, even if just momentarily, and seeking answers from spirits and ghosts as nothing seems to make sense on this planet. My favourite line in the song is ‘good news I could use some’ – I believe everyone has a guardian angel, a protector, and this is me talking to mine.” “The verses actually started as this saxophone sample we were playing around with and eventually it transformed into the melody. I always play the sax back in my head even though it’s not in the song.” 'Little Runaway' features an innovative music video, steered by Celeste’s frequent collaborator Sophie Jones. [via Clash]

Anna Sofia released a brand new music video for her song 'Don’t Play Pretend'. 'Don’t Play Pretend' is from her latest EP Broken Perfection. Over a million streams into her career, Anna Sofia sings this song about her own life. She might not be perfect. She might make mistakes. All that said, at least she doesn’t pretend to be something she’s not. Sofia said she doesn’t have a message. “It’s just real life,” she said. “One day, I hope to fill stadiums all over the world. I want to have fans everywhere and have some way of helping them or guiding them through my music. My confidence comes from being myself and connecting with people.” [via The 360 Mag]

Last year, the K-pop group BLACKPINK made big moves in America with their Kill This Love EP, becoming the highest-charting women-led Korean act on both the Billboard 200 and the Hot 100 (with its title track). They also played Coachella. Earlier this year, they had a guest feature on Lady Gaga’s Chromatica with ‘Sour Candy,’ a single that matched their previous chart record at #33. They’re releasing a new album in a couple months, which was led off by ‘How You Like That’ in June. Now, they’re putting out another song from it, a collaboration with Selena Gomez called ‘Ice Cream.’ The food angle of the track is appropriate for Gomez, who has most recently been in the headlines for her new HBO Max cooking show. [via Stereogum]

Tel-Aviv based artist Noga Erez shares the next in a series of game-changing singles leading into her mysterious second album (details yet to be announced). 'You So Done' and its striking accompanying video are out now via City Slang. Following the sparkling sass of 'VIEWS' and the irresistibly upbeat lockdown anthem 'NO news on TV', Noga Erez and her collaborative partner Ori Rousso's latest offering 'You So Done' has been highly anticipated online since appearing on NBC's Good Girls earlier this year. It sees Erez shift from outward looking political themes to personal soul-searching, opening up for a stirring track about rejection, toxic and emotionally violent relationships, and ones own inner violence. Along with the track she has shared a moving statement, saying: "At some point, exactly one year ago, I started flashing back to one of the darkest times in my life. I was young, incredibly confused and lonely... There was a moment during this period where I was actually so weak, insecure and in need of love that I was not able to step out of what I know now to be an emotionally abusive relationship." She concludes: "It really, truly means the world to me to give this song to you. I hope this story can help some of you to realise that you are not alone. And I really do hope to make it clear that even the darkest places are not impossible to free yourself from. They are eventually an opportunity to learn, grow and to become a stronger person." Erez has created a reputation for the captivating videos that accompany her songs, and this latest video sees her step it up a level yet again. Her third collaboration with Tel Aviv-based director Indy Hait sees Erez as a puppet in a dystopian future, being violently flung to-and-fro by an unknown captor. "The video for 'You So Done' was a big risk taker for me" she comments. "Usually, I have an idea or I work with a director on an idea together. Since this was my third video with Indy Hait, I decided to let him do his thing. He offered up an idea that included a robot and I immediately hated it. I was just not able to imagine how it wouldn't come off as a science fiction video and felt it wasn't my style. But after talking and tearing the idea apart, I realised that this is a truly meaningful character. The robot in this video is actually not the violent character.  Its job was to portray the act of violence through transferring the moves from an unseen character and helping them come alive visually. The video uses muscle memory as the 'engine' to that violent dance act, and muscle memory is something that fascinates me. Eventually this video is far from being science fiction, it is my most personal video to date."

[ohblackdiamond]

fanfiction survey

Author name

Ruriruri (sourisnaime on rockfic)

Fandom you write for:

KISS, although I’ve written for a pretty large amount of fandoms over the last, oww, seventeen years.

Where you post:

Tumblr, AO3, Rockfic

Most popular one shot:

My most popular one-shot isn’t even for KISS; it’s a Death Note one-shot from 2006! My most popular non-collab KISS one-shot is “starfucker,” which is Paul/Gene with a side of Carnac the Magnificent and photography kink.

Most popular multichapter:

I only have the two, so, “the end of the world tour.” It just makes me happy.

Favorite story you wrote:

“something blue” came together the easiest of anything I’ve ever written, but I think I probably did my best characterization in “no change in the weather” and “all of your b-films.” “no change in the weather” has some really tense arguments and a nice catharsis, I feel like, so it edges out b-films by just a little bit, in my opinion.

Story you were nervous to post:

My first KISS fic made me very nervous, because even though I’d been writing fanfic since I was thirteen, I’d always thought that RPF was basically my line in the sand and that it just wasn’t appropriate to write about real people. I’d written “loaded” without even a title and didn’t intend on posting it at all until I found rockfic, where I rationalized that I could post it under a name I hadn’t used and get it out of my system. Then I went ahead and posted it on AO3/tumblr, and the rest is... KISStory.

“careening” also made me nervous because it’s Paul not getting the guy, and it’s also him in a very acerbic, desperate light. I didn’t want anyone feeling like I was bashing him. 

How do you choose your titles:

I pull mostly from other seventies rock songs.

How many stories are:

Completed: All but 2.

In Progress: 2, “the end of the world tour” (which lacks one or two chapters and the epilogue) and its prequel, “black and gold” (which lacks... at least four chapters, probably more like six, but they’re all short). Most of both fics are done, I’m just lazy.

Upcoming story you’re most excited to write:

I have a Peter/Paul, an Ace/Peter, and a Gene/Paul that’ve been in the works for months, just stewing. I also have a Glimmer Twins fic that probably won’t ever get finished. 

Honestly, what I’d like to write is a Gene/Paul that I feel is too fetishy to be appropriate, so it probably won’t even see the light of Notepad. It involves curses that can only be broken through sex. Uh.

Do you accept prompts?

This is a qualified yes. I’ll write any pairing of the original four members. I don’t have anything against anyone that came after in the slightest, but I have a much harder time with their personalities. Plus, I feel like Gene, Paul, Ace, and Peter collectively put each other through enough junk that they probably deserve each other. I don’t really feel that way about the other band members.