#so they rely on various sorts of disguises near constantly

[glitterinlowgravity]

you've got a mostly deceptive, illusory-based party and no fucking identity porn fics

[wanlidas-archive]

a few headcanons about sabina wilson. 

background. 

she is 29 years old and has been part of the townsend agency for seven years.  her birthday is oct. 29. 

she is a lesbian,  though she rarely ever labels herself.  she doesn’t get into many relationships because she’s constantly moving around,  but it’s not something she’s opposed to if she finds the right woman.  she just hasn’t had many serious relationships,  so when something does feel serious,  she jumps in too quickly.  she was engaged once when she was 26,  after dating the woman for a month. there was a gunfight at her wedding but she was the better shot  (  i’ll expand on this later on. )  

she grew up wealthy,  though she sees it as being ‘ powerless & ashamed. ‘  she has abandonment issues and spent a lot of her childhood very alone.  she was rebellious in response + getting into trouble,  always acting out in hopes that her parents may do something about it.  but it backfired;  instead of being there for her more,  she was always being sent away to different facilities.  through that,  and after a few various arrests,  the townsend agency found her and took her in.  she became an angel in 2012,  when she was 22.

she has a sister named mercedes, who is ten years younger than her.  when she was born,  her parents made a better effort to be around more,  which only pushed sabina away more too.  but any resentment she had was never directed towards her sister.  she loved her,  and she’s her favorite person in the world,  but she can’t really be around her family anymore.  she misses her and often thinks of sending her letters,  but she doesn’t,  not wanting to disrupt any sort of peace she may have.  she was always really good with mercedes,  and they got along really well,  so that’s on her mind often. 

she has a criminal record that includes breaking & entering, assault & battery,  grand theft auto, and identity theft.  

personality.

she thinks mission talk is awkward and funny which is why she’s always smiling / laughing whenever she has to use it.  ( ex:  ‘ the coast is clear. ‘ )  it’s not embarrassing,  it’s just funny to her ----  mostly because she never used to believe she would have any kind of importance in the world like she does now.  now,  she’s part of a big operation that relies on her,  so talking like that,  feeling ‘ important ‘ is still really strange to her,  but she often acts nonchalant about it.

she’s known for taking things that aren’t hers and brushing it off like it was the obvious thing to do.  even when people warn her that she shouldn’t take things,  she rarely listens,  or she does and she pretends she doesn’t recall hearing it.  she takes advantage of her power in the sense that she makes herself feel invincible whenever she’s stealing a car, etc.  she pretends she’s invincible despite having been arrested for grand theft auto,  breaking & entering,  and identity theft before.  she does the same thing with the agency too,  keeping a lot of the clothes she likes for herself rather than returning them,  because she knows how replaceable they are and how they cycle through girls all the time enough to not really notice if they’re missing.  she doesn’t do it with weapons from the agency,  though ----  at least not usually.

she’s a bit insensitive in that she’s too blunt too quickly without thinking first.  she means well though,  and she cares a lot,  sometimes her head just can’t keep up with her mouth.

she’s aware she’s not very book smart,  but she makes up for it in other areas:  street smarts,  fighting,  stealth,  manipulation,  etc.  but when she does know something that people wouldn’t expect her to know,  and she gets the opportunity to sound / seem smart,  she gets really prideful and never lets anyone forget about it. 

she holds grudges --- over people,  places,  things,  anything.  and it’s usually of the most petty things,  too.  one small thing goes wrong and she never forgets it.  and she will never stop reminding jane that she shoved her off a roof. '  because it’s so easy for her to hold grudges,  she’s also quick to have trust issues the second anything feels off. 

she is really encouraging.  she may not always have the best things to say,  but she does mean well and she tries to remind people that they’re doing well when it’s deserved.  she knows that kind of positive encouragement + thinking is very important in their line of work.  they have to know they’re capable of what they need to do,  so she reminds them. 

she has a lot of pride in what she does,  and it often leads to her showing off.  but she acts very nonchalant about it, like it’s no big deal  ----  but she likes what she’s capable of and she likes showing people,  even if the people she’s around have the same capabilities.  

she is really good with kids,  not necessarily taking care of them,  but keeping them occupied,  making them laugh,  being their friend,  etc.  she pays a little closer attention whenever kids are near missions because she hates the idea of them getting hurt.  it’s always reminding her of her younger sister,  and how she would never want her to be put in any danger.   and although mercedes is much older now,  sabina’s memories of her are from when she was a child,  so getting to be playful with other kids feels reminiscent of her sister. 

she has a hard time accepting defeat because she’s very stubborn.  she is cocky and prideful,  so when something doesn’t go her way,  it annoys her and she isn’t silent about it.  in response,  she’s normally quick to kick / punch something in annoyance. 

if a mission is at a party,  bar,  etc.,  she takes advantage and drinks on the job. 

ticks.

she often gets her words jumbled.  it rarely ever happens when she’s in disguise;  she’s great at playing her roles.  it’s when she’s just being herself,  talking to the people she’s closed to,  that she gets more flustered.  

she rambles all the time and gets way off track.  she’s aware she does this and she cannot stop it.   [  “i know i can be really annoying.  i don’t try to be.  i don’t have the filter thing other people do.”  ]  

she uses sound effects wherever she seems fit,  even if it’s not entirely appropriate.  it goes back to how she finds mission talk to be a bit awkward and funny  ---  she likes to poke fun at what she does,  because it aids in how carefree she can act about it all,  despite actually being serious about her work.  

she is constantly joking while she’s in danger.  it’s her way of making herself feel safe and brushing the danger off like it’s no big deal / she can handle it.  

fighting.

she’s dramatic & obnoxious,  and she takes advantage of it.  she’s aware that a lot of people find her annoying,  but she knows that can be useful too  ----  like when jane told her to use attention seeking behavior.  something that people are normally annoyed by can also be used at their advantage,  and sabina loves the opportunity to go out of her way and be obnoxious.

she prefers close-distance fighting.  her go to moves are headbutting, kicking, elbowing,  and stomping  (  primarily on men.  )  she’s a good shot,  but she definitely prefers hand to hand contact over guns and knives.  

she prefers anything with bigger risks.  she’s an adrenaline junkie,   always putting herself right in the middle of danger   ----  but she’s not always impulsive or too reckless.  she can tell when other people are being reckless and is quick to try to stop them,  but she also understands what it feels like to just go for something.

she is good at manipulation and sticking to her roles,  for the most part,  but she’s not as great as hiding her annoyances when she’s with a someone she can tell is really bland or dumb.  she can continue on with her role,  but her comments often contrast that.   while she is only interested in women,  she’s good at figuring out what men want to hear,  and she uses that to her advantage when she’s pretending to flirt with them & reel them into a plan.  while she’s good at fake-dating men,  it’s one of the most annoying things for her to do,  and she spends most of her time afterwards laughing about the things they’ve done / said just to combat her annoyances.  

she has a high tolerance for pain and it doesn’t really bother her anymore.  she thinks it’s cooler if something more dramatic happened to her that she actually lived through.

style.

she has kept her hair short since she was sixteen.  her mother had always encouraged her to keep it long,  which is why she cut it all off in the first place,  but soon realized she preferred it that way.  she cut it even shorter when she joined the townsend agency because it’s more practical.  it stays out of her way,  or it fits best under wigs + other disguises.  

she wears a lot of two-piece matching pattern suits.  she has an eccentric style,  doesn’t follow any trends,  and prefers looks that are a bit chaotic. 

when she’s playing a role,  she prefers disguises that are so far out of her normal comfort zone.  she likes taking on entirely different looks because it aids in whatever role she’s trying to fit into.  it’s one of the most fun parts of it all for her.  

[redesignserviceforkitchens-blog]

A Lot Of Popular Kitchen Design and also Floor Plan Suggestions

Seeking some kitchen area design concepts? Obtained a little cooking area and also have to take full advantage of fully? Obtained a substantial cooking area as well as should enhance the expansive format? Got a weary old cooking area that you need a fresh kitchen area layout style? After that this post is for you.

The cooking area is the heart of the home. You want it to have the most effective feasible design and functionality it can. Below, we'll talk about numerous of one of the most usual cooking area designs and their benefits and drawbacks. Consider this short article as a research supplement to your kitchen layout organizer to make sure you're developing the most effective feasible room for you, your family members, as well as your way of living.

KITCHEN AREA WORK TRIANGULAR: REFRIGERATOR, RANGE, & SINK.

Work Triangle Description: This is the design a number of us matured becoming aware of as the holy grail of all kitchen area designs. It's a classic, in fact. In essence, the perfect job triangular design is to have the main and also most-used devices (e.g., fridge, variety, sink) at edge points of a triangular workspace for maximum performance. Generally, you wish to reduce the moment and also initiative spent moving between claimed devices.

Job Triangle Pros: Pivoting from refrigerator to sink to range is smooth and also super efficient. That's rationale behind this idea. It's a classic, tried-and-true cooking area format that comes into play within all other cooking area designs.

Job Triangle Cons: The work triangle could become challenging business, possibly even counter intuitive, in larger cooking areas as well as those with islands. It is necessary to see the woodland through the trees in intending this sort of kitchen area design.

Work Triangular Tips: Maintain the work triangle rather limited, regardless of the dimension of your kitchen area, so about protect some power for dining as well as interacting with liked ones over the food when it's done.

SOLITARY WALL SURFACE COOKING AREA.

Solitary Wall Surface Kitchen Area Description: A kitchen area in which all home appliances, cabinets, and counter spaces are placed along one wall surface. Solitary wall kitchens are usually found in tiny houses, due to the fact that they are little yet efficient spaces that can be disguised as required in a little room (read: studio apartment or similar).

Work Triangular Pros: Rotating from refrigerator to sink to range is seamless and extremely effective. That's rationale behind this concept. It's a classic, tried-and-true cooking area design that enters play within all various other cooking area designs.

Work Triangular Disadvantages: The job triangle can become difficult organisation, probably also counterproductive, in larger cooking areas as well as those with islands. It's important to see the forest via the trees in preparing this type of kitchen area layout.

Work Triangular Tips: Maintain the work triangle fairly tight, regardless of the dimension of your kitchen area, so as to protect some energy for dining and also communicating with enjoyed ones over the food when it's done.

SOLITARY WALL COOKING AREA.

Single Wall Cooking Area Description: A cooking area in which all devices, cabinets, and counter areas are positioned along one wall surface. Single wall surface kitchen areas are normally located in tiny residences, since they are little yet reliable rooms that could be disguised as required in a small room (read: studio apartment or similar).

Solitary Wall Surface Cooking Area Pros: Components, home appliances, as well as food prep area all have the tendency to be within simple reach in a single wall surface kitchen layout.

Solitary Wall Surface Cooking Area Disadvantages: Because of their tiny size and also the standard appliances demands, solitary wall surface cooking areas tend to be really restricted in counter space. Food prep and also several chefs pose an obstacle.

Single Wall Surface Kitchen Tips: Usually, the sink beings in between the variety and also refrigerator in a single wall surface kitchen, for simple clean-up (in addition to visual balance). Think about opting for portable or custom (smaller sized) appliances to optimize the minimal space. Additionally, include an island opposite the solitary cabinet wall surface for an excellent storage, effectiveness, as well as people-gathering alternative.

GALLEY COOKING AREA.

Galley Kitchen Description: A galley cooking area, likewise referred to as a corridor-style kitchen area, is basically a kitchen in the form of a hallway ... as well as is just one of one of the most reliable kitchen area formats for food preparation. The galley cooking area is lengthy as well as narrow, with two straight work on either side. (These could be two wall surfaces, or they can be one cabineted wall surface and an island that creates the 2nd galley "wall.").

Galley Kitchen Area Pros: The galley kitchen area is a very reliable cooking area format, optimizing a normally small, cramped room with rotating devices, cabinetry, and also counter area. It's so popular in its efficiency, actually, that the galley kitchen area is the key cooking area layout design for a lot of dining establishments.

Galley Cooking Area Disadvantages: In galley cooking areas, it's more suitable to have the sink and range on other sides, for better performance; nonetheless, this cooking area design has the tendency to interfere with the circulation. Also, there is no integral room for eating or "socializing" with family and friends, as is given in lots of other kitchen layout designs.

Galley Kitchen Area Tips: Keep both ends of the galley cooking area open up to bring in even more all-natural light as well as produce links to the remainder of the home. An additional suggestion is to put the sink and cooktop on one side of the galley to keep the messes contained.

L-SHAPED KITCHEN.

L-Shaped Kitchen Area Summary: The L-shaped cooking area is precisely exactly what its name suggests. It's an edge kitchen, which has the tendency to bring about less cooking area web traffic (since it's "off the beaten track"). This kitchen area format usually involves one primary wall of closets and sink or variety vertical as well as beside an additional, much shorter wall.

L-Shaped Cooking Area Pros: The very nature of the L-shaped kitchen gives intrinsic privacy for food prep, resembling an edge concealed. Nonetheless, it additionally gives fantastic interaction with open idea areas, as it inherently opens up right into adjacent spaces such as the excellent area or various other family-focused rooms. An outstanding selection for entertaining.

L-Shaped Cooking Area Disadvantages: L-shaped configuration has the tendency to permit less space in the kitchen area, considerably restricting the variety of people in the cooking area in all. This layout could also operate awkwardly, relying on the size of the L's legs.

L-Shaped Cooking Area Tips: Quickly make the most of room and interaction (without having way too many cooks in the kitchen) with an L-shaped kitchen area as well as an island. This provides enough main storage that the actual L form's legs needn't be miles long.

U-SHAPED COOKING AREA.

U-Shaped Cooking Area Description: The U-shaped cooking area is a rather modern-day idea, having actually evolved with time as kitchen-area storage space requires enhanced. This kitchen area design resembles a glorified galley kitchen, with one end shut off.

U-Shaped Kitchen Pros: The U-shaped kitchen area gives lots of counter room, in addition to lots of cupboard space, because the closets border three of the 4 wall surfaces in the kitchen. This sort of cooking area design additionally attaches to the rest of the house by maintaining one side open.

U-Shaped Cooking Area Disadvantages: The U-shaped kitchen area is developed for one primary chef; this sort of kitchen area layout is off the ruined path, so to speak, calling for a specific need to enter. The U-shaped kitchen area is generally very tiny and provides no dine-in setup. And also, placing the dishwashing machine near the sink (suitable arrangement) can be challenging.

U-Shaped Kitchen Area Tips: Due To The Fact That the U-shaped cooking area permits a great deal of adaptability in kitchen area design, don't be afraid to be adaptable in your usage. An island works well in the U-shaped cooking area to urge interaction and offer dine-in capacities. You could likewise turn component of one wall surface into a peninsula (instead of a full wall surface) by getting rid of the upper cabinets as well as opening up the air space.

FUNCTIONAL KITCHEN AREA "ZONES.".

Kitchen Areas Description: The idea behind a "zoned" cooking area format is that the kitchen will function best if separated into areas with different functions. For example, the areas could be food storage space, food prep, cooking, eating, cleansing, as well as kitchen storage.

Cooking Area Zones Pros: A number of people could work effectively in the kitchen simultaneously, without getting in each other's way. Also, the zoned kitchen has the tendency to be organized as well as effective since each area is dedicated to a particular job.

Kitchen Area Areas Cons: There will certainly constantly be overlap amongst the zoned features, so this could not really be as fluent a kitchen area format style actually as theoretically.

Cooking Area Areas Tips: Take into consideration the principles behind the Job Triangular between the zones themselves. For example, intend the food preparation area to be near the food storage as well as cooking zones, while the cleaning zone would certainly function well near the cooking area storage space zone.

[privateplates4u]

Bentley Bentayga review – the ultimate luxury SUV?

For  Immensely capable, W12 and V8 diesel options both immensely rapid Against  Very heavy, and not really able to shrug it off... and just look at it... Bentley's first SUV is sure to be a sales hit, but its sheer weight limits the appeal as a drivers SUV The Bentley Bentayga takes the terms ‘performance’ and ‘luxury’, ramps them up to the extreme, and then attaches them to an SUV. It’s Bentley’s first car in this class, and as such it’s an extremely polarising model. Is it a triumph of modern engineering and proper Bentley to boot, or is it a cynical attempt to cash in on the growing global SUV market at the expense of the British brand’s rich heritage? Whatever the Bentayga is, it’s certainly not a half-baked effort. In fact, it might be Bentley’s most advanced car to date. This near-2.5-tonne beast may have a cabin stuffed with as much fine leather and wood as a gentleman’s club, but it also has performance to rival serious sports cars. There’s even a modicum of off-road ability – not exactly a Bentley hallmark – and a reassuringly hefty price tag to match. > Click here for our review of the Range Rover The Bentayga may not be a classic Bentley in spirit – in fact, we’d be very surprised if owners are ever let out of a side turning – but in engineering terms, it’s up there with the best, and sits pretty much in a class of one at the top of the luxury SUV pile. Image 11 of 34 Image 11 of 34 Bentley Bentayga in detail: Performance and 0-60 time > Staggering pace from such a huge car; 0-60 time rivals even sports cars Engine and gearbox > Choice of W12 petrol or V8 diesel, both mated to smooth auto gearbox Ride and handling > Impressive, but there’s no disguising the size and weight of this monstrous car MPG and running costs > ‘Frugal’ is a word that doesn’t feature in the Bentayga’s dictionary, but diesel will do 600 miles between fill-ups Interior and tech > Shades of Audi Q7, but stuffed with enough leather, wood and technology to make up for it Design > It’s difficult to call the Bentayga pretty, but ‘imposing’ certainly covers it Image 12 of 34 Image 12 of 34 Prices, specs and rivals The Bentley Bentayga is, perhaps understandably, priced out of reach of all but society’s top earners. A starting price of £135,800 gets the ball rolling, but for most owners that’ll just be a jumping off point for even greater expense. For instance, you’ll need to cough up an extra £30,000 if you want the stonking W12 petrol engine, while it gets even more extreme if you begin to peruse the expansive options list. That said, most Bentayga buyers will let their accounts worry about the price lists, and are unlikely to baulk at a £22k Naim stereo upgrade. The dash-mounted Breitling clock may raise a few eyebrows though – it’s machined in solid gold and costs over £150k (on top of the price of the car!). Rivals? Not many. The elite may consider the Bentayga alongside more traditional luxury cars like a Rolls-Royce Ghost or even Bentley’s own Mulsanne. But we think it’s more likely to appeal as a luxury option for those who need genuine practicality for outdoorsy pursuits. After all, the children’s riding gear can be awfully muddy, and the family Labrador can’t ride in an enclosed boot either. That pitches it as a rival to the Range Rover, Porsche Cayenne or Audi Q7 – albeit at a significantly higher price point. The Range Rover offers the most compelling alternative – a long-wheelbase SVAutobiography fitted with a 550bhp V8 engine starts from £167,280, offering comparable performance and luxury to the Bentayga. In fact, some might argue that it provides a better luxury experience. The Range Rover does after all ride on its own platform, while the Bentayga – no matter how powerful and expensive – shares a great deal of its components and oily bits with the considerably humbler Audi Q7. The Range Rover also offers a far more imperious driving position, while it’ll show a dirty pair of heels to the Bentayga off-road. Performance and 0-60 time Four seconds. That’s a 0-60 time you might think belongs to a low-slung sports car, or perhaps an entry-level supercar. But to apply it to a car weighing well over two tonnes seems impossible. Yet thanks to its 12 cylinders and duo of twin scroll turbos, the 6.0-litre W12 model will leave a Porsche 718 Cayman or Audi RS3 trailing in its not inconsiderable wake. It’s then capable of going on to a frankly ridiculous 187mph top speed, which is pretty pace for a car that shares it  footprint and kerbweight with the average two-bedroom cottage. Plump for the diesel model and you’ll have the honour of driving one of the fastest oil-burners around. 4.0-litres of V8 – the same block as you’ll find in the Audi SQ7 – makes 429bhp and a truly colossal 664lb ft of torque. 0-60mph takes 4.6 seconds, while top speed is 168mph. Image 23 of 34 Image 23 of 34 Engine and gearbox There are only two engine choices in the Bentley Bentayga for now – a 6.0-litre W12 petrol engine or a 4.0-litre V8 diesel. We may see a smaller, V8 petrol in the future, as in the Continental, which could become the engine of choice. No matter which unit you go for, out-and-out muscle is the name of the game. > Click here for our review of the Continental GT Both engines are mated to the same smooth ZF 8-speed gearbox, which sees service in everything from the Range Rover Sport to the BMW 1-series, so there’s no cause for concern there – it’s smooth and quick-shifting and, more importantly, can handle the 600+lb ft of torque that both engines produce. Image 17 of 34 Image 17 of 34 Which engine you choose depends where your priorities lie. A diesel engine in a supposed ‘luxury’ vehicle may seem like sacrilege – and owners of the Bentayga aren’t likely to have more than a passing interest in fuel economy anyway. No, where the diesel wins out is range. It’s not very glamorous filling up at the local Esso, and stopping every 350 miles in the W12 is bound to become tiresome on a cross-continental cruise. The diesel on the other hand can manage almost 600 miles on a tank, theoretically nearly halving your fuel stops and making for a much more relaxed, and faster, journey. Ride and handling Bentley’s engineers have tried hard to hide the Bentayga’s considerable mass, but in the final reckoning you can’t cheat physics, not matter how hard you try. That’s not to say the big off-roader isn’t composed and competent, but it certainly doesn’t put the Sports into Sports Utility Vehicle. The Bentayga shares the basic chassis architecture as the Audi Q7, which means it gets the same anti-roll system. Powered by 48 Volt electrics, this set-up essentially tautens the anti-roll bars in a fraction of second, helping keep the Bentley on a surprisingly even keel through a series of corners. There’s surprising grip, too, and the Bentayga clings on with greater tenacity than you’d think possible for a car weighing the best part of three tons. Direct and accurate steering helps place the car, even if feedback is in limited supply. As you’d expect, there’s a raft of driver modes to choose from - Comfort, Bentley, Sport and Individual, plus another four off-road settings. ‘Bentley’ is the default setting and aims to strike the right balance between comfort and agility. On the whole it’s well judged, the air suspension soaking up big bumps and pummelling the smaller stuff into submission. Selecting Sport tautens the dampers a little without damaging ride quality, but the changes are so small that it’s best to leave it to its own devices in Bentley. Image 21 of 34 Image 21 of 34 Drive briskly and the Bentayga feels decently planted, but up the pace a little and it starts to unravel a little. Body movements are kept in check better than you’d think, but it’s the brakes that suffer the most. Not only are they tasked with slowing the hefty Bentley, they’re also working hard as part of the torque vectoring system, constantly nibbling away to keep the Bentayga’s nose locked as faithfully as possible onto you chosen line. However, it doesn’t take many corners before the effort involved in keeping the Bentley pointing where you want takes its toll on the braking performance. As a result, it’s best to take it a little easier and rely on the old tried and tested technique of slow in and fast out. Driven with this sort of decorum, you can make impressively rapid progress as you make the most of the combination of the engine’s explosive performance and four-wheel drive traction. Speaking of all-wheel drive, the Bentley will head far further off-road than most owners will probably ever dare go. The air suspension can be raised for greater ground clearance, the various driver modes deliver grip where you’d expect slip and there’s even hill descent control. Whether you’d want to risk those 21-inch rims in the rough stuff is an entirely different matter…. MPG and running costs The Bentayga is predictably costly to run. Everything – from premium petrol to the first-rate servicing it requires – costs extra, but that’s not really a problem for most Bentley owners, is it? Very few of these cars will be bought by penny pinchers, and so owners will be willing to pay whatever it takes to keep their ultra-luxury SUV in fine fettle. Fuel economy will be an alien phrase to most Bentley buyers, but owners of the W12 can expect mpg figures in the late teens in real-world driving – compared to Bentley’s official figure of 21.6mpg. CO2 emissions are a similarly hefty 296g/km, which is enough to put the Bentayga firmly in the highest road tax bracket. That means you’ll have to shell out £2000 in first year road tax, and then £140 a year thereafter – plus a further £310 for the first five years owing to the high list price. Image 24 of 34 Image 24 of 34 Opt for the diesel and things become rather more palatable. A combined fuel economy figure of 35.8mpg is positively frugal, while CO2 emissions are two bands down on the W12 at 210g/km – attracting a £1200 first year road tax fee. Regardless of engine, the Bentayga slots into the top Group 50 for insurance – though we suspect most owners will have these garaged, which could keep premiums reasonable.   Interior and tech The Bentayga is as ostentatious inside as it is out – clamber inside and you’ll find swathes of quilted leather, incredibly intricate wood veneers and handcrafted details all over the place, as you would in any Bentley. It’s all very lovely, but try not to prod too hard or you may find certain features remind you rather too much of the Audi Q7. The cupholders, for example, are made from cheap plastic, while the infotainment is straight out of a high-end Volkswagen in look and feel. That’s not to say the cabin doesn’t work well, but it lacks the bespoke nature of something like a Range Rover – ignore the lustrous materials and organ stop ventilation controls and you could quite easily be in an Audi Q7, Porsche Cayenne or even – whisper it – a Volkswagen Touareg. At least you won’t be wanting for technology. Bentley has thrown the book at the Bentayga, and almost everything you’d want comes as standard – sat-nav, wifi, soft-close doors, full LED head and tail-lights and plenty more besides. Image 27 of 34 Image 27 of 34 Of course, you can personalise your Bentayga, specifying your interior finish with as much precision as you like. Choose a bespoke wood veneer and leather colour – even split the front and rear seats with different finishes if you so fancy. On a more sensible note, we’d probably spec the surround-view camera system, as the Bentayga has very expensive bumpers to ding, while adaptive cruise control will make those trans-continental road trips all the more relaxing. Design The Bentayga is based on the same platform as the Audi Q7, so its basic proportions are fairly similar. The scalable nature of the VW Group’s MLB platform means it’s a significantly larger car, though – and at two metres in width (without mirrors!) it commands a significant road presence. That’s aided by monstrous 20 or 21-inch wheels and of course the huge chrome Bentley grille up front. Styling is inspired by the EXP F9 concept, but we’re glad to see that it’s been toned down from that car. Traditional Bentley styling cues – the quad headlights, the classic grille – combine with modern touches like the LED taillamps, which proudly display a Bentley ‘B’ when illuminated. You’d be hard pressed to call the Bentayga pretty, but it’s definitely imposing, and that’s what really matters to a lot of buyers. Image 5 of 34 Image 5 of 34   10 Nov 2017

http://www.evo.co.uk/bentley/bentayga

[thegeekcurmudgeon]

The Steam-Driven Time Machine: My Adventures in Steampunk

As revealed in my previous post, I’m moderating the Steampunk panel at this weekend’s Comicpalooza. Newer folks may wonder why I’m moderating such a panel. (Or not, but I’m going to share this with you anyway).

Way back in 2008, I produced this little essay for Ann and Jeff VanderMeer’s bestselling, seminal anthology Steampunk. The magnificent book came out just at the beginnings of the latest Steampunk craze. After nine printings, one could argue it helped fan the flames of the movement.

Without further ado, here’s the unabridged piece.

The Steam-Driven Time Machine:

A Pop Culture Survey

by

Rick Klaw

When I was a child in the seventies, it seemed like the 1961 Ray Harryhausen special effects-laden The Mysterious Island played constantly on the TV. Not that I minded. Michael Craig leads a crew of Confederate P.O.W. escapees as they pilot a hot air balloon toward points unknown. Crash landing on an apparently deserted island, the castaways encounter giant animals: a crab, a flightless bird, bees and an cephalopod, all presented in Harryhausen’s dynamic stop motion animation. The group discovers the presumed dead Captain Nemo, who had mutated the animals as part of an experiment. Throw in the pirates that attack the island and you have the recipe for a near-perfect movie. By nine years old, after many repeated viewings the film entered my personal zeitgeist, informing my later tastes and many of my creative decisions.

Mysterious Island was my first exposure to steampunk, long before K. W. Jeter coined the word in the late 1980s.

Personally, I think Victorian fantasies are going to be the next big thing, as long as we can come up with a fitting collective term for [Tim] Powers, [James] Blaylock and myself. Something based on the appropriate technology of the era; like “steampunks,” perhaps… (Locus, #315 April 1987)

Featuring interviews with Jeter and Blaylock plus a cover by Tim Powers, the Winter, 1988 issue of Nova Express introduced me to the term “steampunk.” By that time Powers and Blaylock were both part of my reading repertoire. Jeter joined a few years later.

Among many of the advantages of living in Austin as a young science fiction fan in the late eighties and early nineties was the strong and fairly well organized creative community. The local science fiction literary convention, Armadillocon birthed though probably as a surrogate the Cyberpunk movement, as it was the first North American convention to feature William Gibson, Bruce Sterling, Lewis Shiner, and Pat Cadigan as guests of honor. Austinite Lawrence Person’s previously mentioned ‘zine Nova Express further encouraged science fiction critical studies with insightful interviews and reviews by professionals and fans alike.

Some twenty years later, pop culture has embraced steampunk. Publishing, film, and even the Internet embolden the term as a branding tool. Nary a week goes by without Boing Boing (www.boingboing.net), the venerable group blog, posting about some sort of steampunk inspired gadget, cartoon, or essay. A search of their archives generates almost 1500 articles. Subjects vary greatly: laptops, keyboards, watches, Transformers, planes, Car Wars, submarines, and so on. Many articles showcase functioning modern technology using steampunk methods and materials. Others present actual working machines from the 19th century. Images presenting artistic depictions of steampunk, paintings, sculptures, architecture and the like. Reinterpretations of popular shows such as Star Trek and Star Wars litter the listings. Original short films featuring steampunk tropes offer many amusing and sometimes exciting diversions.

The user-generated online encyclopedia Wikipedia (en.wikipedia.org) contains lengthy, extensive entries for both “Steampunk” and “List of steampunk works”, citing an array of sources. The English language version of the Polish site Retrostacji, Steampunkopedia (steampunk.republika.pl) offers the most comprehensive steampunk works chronological bibliography available on the web along with numerous links to steampunk-inspired videos. Sadly, the site stopped updating in February, 2007.

Using the collaborative wiki-method, ﾆther Emporium (etheremporium.pbwiki.com) claims “to provide a onestop resource and archive for all things Steampunk”. Potentially very interesting, the sparse site supplies some intriguing information and views from the nascent steampunk subculture. Another online cultural source, SteamPunk Magazine (www.steampunkmagazine.com), dedicated to “promoting steampunk as a culture, as more than a sub-category of fiction”, produces a pdf format magazine and for-sale print version under the auspices of the Creative Commons license, an agreement that allows anyone to share and distribute the work as long as it is not for commercial or financial gain. Each of the three currently produced issues contain fiction, features exploring different aspects of the subgenre, and interviews with steampunk luminaries.

Even Wired (www.wired.com), home of the techno elite, lists some 930 archived pages about the subgenre. Often sharing similar coverage with its cyberculture cousin Boing Boing, the subjects run the pop culture gamut. Oddly, the domain name steampunk.com works as the home for The Speculative Fiction Clearing House, a portal for science fiction websites. The site has only a tangential relationship with the subgenre.

Back in the late eighties, I encountered my first steampunk role playing game. Featuring Victorian space travel and steam powered devices, Space 1889 (1988) was the first primarily steampunk rpg. At the time, I immersed myself in the rpg community, envisioning myself more of a gamer and possibly role play games creator than an essay or even a fiction writer. This delusion lasted for about two years, after which I decided to devote my creative energies toward other writing and editing pursuits.

Prior to Space 1889, steampunk elements frequently cropped up in games. Most Dungeons & Dragons campaigns contained various steam-powered devices, usually projectiles or vehicles. Hero Games’ pulp era adventure game Justice, Inc (1984) featured many steampunk-type props, most notably steam-powered robots. Cthulhu By Gaslight, Victorian era rules for the Lovecraft-inspired Call of Cthulhu game, premiered in 1986. While set in the 1890s, the supplement relied less on steampunk– beyond an odd section on time travel– and more on real-world settings.

In the ensuing years, steampunk routinely appeared in rpgs. Within the popular gaming universes such as Warhammer, GURPS, and Dungeons & Dragons, steam-driven devices and Victorian era tropes became commonplace. The cross-pollination of the American Old West and anachronistic devices thrived within several games, chiefly Deadlands and the Japanese title Terra the Gunslinger.

Even LARPers got in the act. Premiering May 21, 2004 near Baltimore, MD with a three-day episode, Brassey’s Game, a steampunk live action role playing game (LARP)1, involved approximately 30 players in Victorian garb, who relied on heavy character interaction. The initial campaign ran for six weekend-long episodes. Six other stand alone Brassey’s Game episodes took place during the first campaign. Since its introduction, several other groups from various parts of the US, using modified versions of the original rules, participated in their own Brassey’s Game events.

Another element of my seventies childhood, The Wild Wild West, the first, best, and longest running steampunk television series, forged my future love of the weird western. The show related the adventures of two Secret Service agents- James West, a charming, womanizing hero, and Artemus Gordon, inventor and master of disguise– as they protected, often in secret, the United States, its interests and citizens. In four seasons from 1965-1969, the duo encountered all sorts of odd villainy including a brilliant but insane dwarf, recurring arch-villain Dr. Miguelito Quixote Loveless, and bizarre weaponry such as cue stick guns and a triangular steam-powered tank with a barbed tip. Combining the best elements of traditional westerns and James Bond, The Wild Wild West spawned two late seventies TV movies with the original cast, a dreadful 1999 big screen movie, two separate comic book series (1960s Gold Key and 1991 Millennium Publications), and four novels, as well as influencing a generation of writers including Joe R. Lansdale, Norman Partridge, and Howard Waldrop.

The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr., the direct thematic descendant of The Wild Wild West, premiered on August 27, 1993, starring the cult actor Bruce Campbell of Evil Dead fame as the title character. Set in the 1890s, Brisco attempts to capture the members of the Bly Gang, the cutthroats responsible for his father’s death. The series sported an intriguing cast of characters: Lord Bowler, bounty hunter and rival, lawyer Socrates Poole, Dixie Cousins, con-woman and Brisco’s great love, and inventor/scientist Professor Wickwire, brilliantly portrayed by John Astin and supplier of Brisco’s steampunk-like gadgetry. Even with clever story lines, the show lasted for only one season.

Perhaps the most unexpected use of weird western steampunk tropes occurred in the second season of the animated Adventures of Batman & Robin. “Showdown” with a Joe R. Lansdale teleplay from a story by Kevin Altieri, Paul Dini, and Bruce W. Timm tells of the immortal Batman villain Ra’s al Ghul’s 1883 confrontation with the DC Comics gunslinger Jonah Hex. The battle centers around a plot to blow up the nearly-completed tracks of a transcontinental railroad using dirigibles loaded with cannons and other explosives.

Because starring in one Wild Wild West­-inspired short lived TV series is never enough, Bruce Campbell portrayed the title character for two seasons in the disappointingly inane Jack of All Trades (2000). Jack Stiles, a secret service agent stationed by President Thomas Jefferson on the fictional French-controlled island of Palau-Palau, defends American interests while serving as the aide to a French aristocratic. Jack employs many steampunk-type weapons and gadgets. Loosely based on the classic 1919 novel, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s The Lost World amazingly ran for three seasons (1999-2000) with poor special effects, bad acting, poorly crafted storylines, and some minor steampunk elements. The 1982 Q.E.D., set in Edwardian England, last for only six episodes. Voyagers!, a time travel adventure series with periodic steampunk bits, managed 22 episodes over one season (1982-1983). Steampunk materials appeared in several episodes of the various Doctor Who incarnations.

Under the premise that Jules Verne actually lived the adventures that he wrote about, The Secret Adventures of Jules Verne (2000) delivered steampunk action with airships, steam powered devices, and even a steampunk cyborg! Playing upon the inherent metafictional possibilities, several episodes featured “real life” authors and personalities such as Samuel Clemens, Queen Victoria, Alexander Dumas, Cardinal Richelieu (a time travel episode), and King Louis XIII. The promising show never jelled and was canceled after one season.

The Japanese have also embraced steampunk television, albeit the animated variety. Based on the long running manga Fullmetal Alchemist, set in an alternate late- 20th century society that practices alchemy and uses primarily early 20th technology, enjoyed a 51 episode run (2003-2004) and an 2005 anime feature film. Steam Detectives (1989-1990) follows the adventures of a young detective in a reality where the only source of energy is steam power. Set on a floating world with stylized Victorian fashions, Last Exile (2003) relates the story of airship pilots Claus and Lavie and their involvement in a plot about a mysterious cargo.

Another steampunk show derived from the works of Jules Verne, Nadia: The Secret of Blue Water (1989-1991) inspired a feature film sequel (1992) and a manga series. Set in 1889, circus performer Nadia, young inventor Jean Ratlique, and the famed Captain Nemo attempt to save the world from the Atlantean known as Gargolye who is bent on restoring the former underseas empire. Translated into eight different languages, the series achieved worldwide popularity.

Based on a series of popular video games, Sakura Wars relates an alternate 1920s reality that uses steam primarily to power all sorts of modern devices. Developed into numerous video games on several platforms, a manga, a tv series, five OVA2 tie-ins, and a feature length movie, Sakura remains a uniquely Japanese cultural phenomenon.

Back in the seventies, Mysterious Island opened my eyes to new worlds as I encountered many more steampunk films. The 1930s Universal monster pictures with lighting-powered monsters, chemically induced madmen, and animal-mutating mad scientists exploited the yet undefined genre. Beneath a Victorian backdrop, Victor Frankenstein empowered his creatures in both Frankenstein (1931) and Bride of Frankenstein (1935) using the highly unlikely method of electrocution. In the latter film, Dr. Pretorius joins forces with Frankenstein, attempting to create life through alchemical means. Director James Whale recognized the inherent Victorian melodrama and the treated the films accordingly, thus creating two masterpieces.

Two of H. G. Wells’ science gone-amok novels inspired a pair of 1933 Universal movies. The Invisible Man, directed under the masterful hand of James Whale, relates the story of a man who goes mad after imbibing his own creation: an invisibility potion. Starring Charles Laughton and Bela Lugosi, The Island of Lost Souls adapted The Island of Dr. Moreau for the first time. The story of Dr. Moreau and his rebellious mutations, like that of The Invisible Man speak to the Victorian notions of science and sadism. The Island of Lost Souls has been remade poorly twice as The Island of Dr. Moreau (1977, 1996).

Fittingly, the first film recognized as steampunk was the 1902 fourteen-minute French animated short Le Voyage dans la lune (A Trip to the Moon), based on Jules Verne’s From the Earth to the Moon and H.G. Wells’ The First Men in the Moon. Wildly popular upon its release, the Georges Méliès film– one of his hundreds of fantasy films– achieved canonical status within science fiction.

Hollywood rediscovered Verne with a vengeance in the 1950s and 1960s, making numerous film adaptations including the steampunk films 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea (1954), The Fabulous World of Jules Verne (1958), Journey to the Center of the Earth (1959), Mysterious Island (1961), Master of the World (1961), Five Weeks in a Balloon (1962), and tangentially Captain Nemo and the Underwater City (1969). Wells was not far behind with most notably The Time Machine (1961). One of producer George Pal’s special effect spectaculars, The Time Machine thematically remained close to the source material especially the portrayal of the machine itself. An awful version of Wells’ book was made in 2002.

The seventies witnessed a severe drop in steampunk related films as whiz bang space science fiction became the norm. A notable exception, the entertaining Time After Time (1979) suggested that Wells invented a time machine and traveled to 1979 in pursuit of Jack the Ripper.

In 1986, Hayao Miyazaki released his groundbreaking anime Castle in the Sky (aka Laputa: Castle in the Sky). A magical tour-de-force featuring floating cities, airships, and pirates, the film follows a young girl, Sheeta, and boy, Pazu, on their quest for the mystical, missing city of Laputa. Miyazaki returned to steampunk in 2001 with his masterpiece Spirited Away, the highest grossing movie in the history of Japan. Easily the most awarded steampunk work in any medium, Spirited Away won the Academy Award for Best Animated Film, the Amsterdam Fantastic Film Festival Silver Scream Award, the Nebula Award for Best Script, the San Francisco International Film Festival Audience Award Best Narrative Feature, five Mainichi Film Concours Awards, two Awards of the Japanese Academy, four Annie Awards, and many others. Miyazaki’s eagerly anticipated follow up was the steampunk Howl’s Moving Castle (2004), based on Diana Wynne Jones’ popular young adult novel. Successful both financially and critically, Howl’s plays as a traditional European fairy tale but with steampunk elements.

Sadly with a few exceptions, Miyazaki’s works represent the abnormal in modern steampunk. While movies such as Vidocq (2001), The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003), Hellboy (2004), Van Helsing (2004), Around the World in 80 Days (2004), Steamboy (2004), and The Brothers Grimm (2005) display strong stylings, they all fall short on substantive storytelling.

The third and perhaps weakest of Terry Gillum’s Trilogy of the Imagination, The Adventures of Baron Munchausen (1988) recounts the legendary tales of eponymous Baron. Littered throughout with steampunk tropes and devices, Gillum displays a magical world in this delightful, if overlong film.

The French duo Jean-Pierre Jeunet and Marc Caro created the strange, surrealist masterpiece 1995’s The City of Lost Children (La Cité des enfants perdus). Unable to dream, a mad scientist steals the dreams of children. The kidnapping of a circus strongman’s little brother leads to some bizarre and fascinating confrontations between the strongman, the children, and the scientist. Beautifully imagined within a late 19th century industrial city complex, The City of Lost Children magically envisions a dark steampunk society.

The disappointing film version of The Golden Compass, the first novel of Phillip Pullman’s extraordinary trilogy His Dark Materials, premiered in 2007 amidst a maelstrom of controversy, as various Christian groups–most notably The Catholic League– urged their members to boycott the movie citing the story’s perceived anti-God bias. The protesters had little to worry about since director/screenwriter Chris Weitz stripped the original tale of any complexity and relevant subtext, presenting a dull, lifeless movie. Even with gorgeous visual effects (particularly of the dæmons and the airships), superior acting (especially Dakota Blue Richards’ authentic portrayal of a fierce twelve year-old girl), and a $200 million budget, The Golden Compass offered yet another 21st century steampunk film failure.

Some thirty-five years after my initial discovery, steampunk still fascinates. I eagerly await to read about the new devices listed on Boing Boing. Even given the poor quality of most steampunk movies, films with airships and Victorian stylings still excite me. Clearly I am not alone as evident by the sheer amount of steampunk material continually being produced and the very existence of this anthology. 

Vive la vapeur!

1a form of role-playing game where the players physically act out their characters’ actions.

2Original video adaption, a phrase coined by the Japanese for direct-to-video films.

The Steam-Driven Time Machine: My Adventures in Steampunk was originally published on The Geek Curmudgeon