#so therefore: tumblr salt

[yuridovewing]

i understand the frustration with “i made this gay pairing cis x trans so they can still have biological babies” with no thought to other methods and how ppl assume thats the case when it comes to mothpool aus where mothwing is also the mother of the three, but also…. idk i kinda dont give a shit if someone wants to do that and i dont really think its inherently transphobic as long as its handled with care and respect.

what really concerns me about this debate is how some people are adamant that you cannot portray trans people having biological children in media or youre being disrespectful. and im gonna say as a nonbinary person who doesnt want children for themself- thats kinda fucking weird? like i understand that for some people, theyre trans themselves and theyre speaking from a place of dysphoria, and i absolutely get that, which is why i think the topic should be handled with nuance and diversity in trans characters, but like…. guys. pregnant trans men exist irl. trans women get people pregnant irl. trans ppl’s ability and right to parent and have biological children are being debated irl. we get denied the opportunity to adopt as well.

in a climate like this, are we SURE we want the stance on rewrites and headcanons in the silly cat books to be “if you portray trans characters having children, especially with a gay couple, youre a transphobic freak no matter what!” does it really matter? especially if its being done by a trans person handling the topic with nuance who has a lot of trans characters with varying perspectives?

obviously yes, remember that thats not the only way certain gay couples can have kids, remember that not every trans person is fully comfortable with it and keep that in mind, remember that surrogacy and adoption are also perfectly valid ways to give fan babies- but remember that there are OPTIONS. not that you need to condemn the idea of transgender parents in the first place unless they fit the very specific criteria of “proper transgender representation” and anything that dares deviate from that is proof the op is a transphobic monster (bonus points if theyre a trans creator bc i mostly see trans people getting shit for this and it kinda pisses me off. although idm if cis people do it either as long as theyre handling it with respect)

[vexingwoman]

I'm sorry if this isn't articulated well and is a little rambly, I'm autistic, please take my words with a grain of salt. as a former member of that "whump community" (who's still into that kind of media) I know most of them are tifs, tho I was in it more when most of the popular writers on tumblr were still girls. It's also primarily autistic people from my experience.

you're definitely 100% right that they're not identifying as real men, I'm detrans and i don't even conflate the 2 in my mind which i think is a thing most RFs don't get about yaoi and this kind of thing, i didn't want to be a real guy, fictional men r like their own species lol. they're everything real men could never be. it might be hard to understand if you're less chronically online but I'm sure though not consciously, fictional men aren't even really related to real men in most of these people's minds.

With whump stuff I was always more uncomfortable or uninterested when it was a woman, maybe because women in media being hurt and weak is the norm (and it feels too real seeing a woman getting hurt since there's a closer connection), and it happening to men is an intriguing reversal. More male attracted women (im bi) are into more sensitive guys which sadly mostly exist in media, so it's just escapism.

I think that's also why they identify as trans males, they want to become closer to the fictional ideal of a male who can be soft and sensitive, or possibly being autistic and having trouble separating your special interests and escapist fantasies from every facet of your life.

(For context, this was sent in response to this post)

I think you’re onto something here. Brutality against female people is so common that we’re completely desensitized to it, and consequently, female characters being brutalized doesn’t emotionally move us. Either that, or brutality against female characters is highly sexualized, and further dehumanizes them. 

On the other hand, brutality against a male character is unexpected and unusual. Therefore, we are emotionally moved by it and able to recognize it for the tragedy it is. Indeed, this might explain why the “whump community” almost exclusively romanticizes the torture and anguish of male characters, and why so many of its members identify as trans guys. 

Furthermore, have you noticed that most of the tropes this community romanticizes are things that, at least in real life, female people are primarily the victims of? For example: rape, kidnapping, stalking, being drugged, being sold. It almost feels like an attempt to vicariously garner empathy for female suffering, without the element of being another cliché female victim. I feel like they impose female suffering onto male characters because they know the audience actually empathizes for males and views them as full human beings. 

In the end, I think it all comes down to female people’s desire to be fully humanized and to escape gendered stereotyping. For example, you stated that many trans-identified females “want to become closer to the fictional ideal of a male who can be soft and sensitive.” But why is a soft, sensitive male character so much more charming to them than a soft, sensitive female character? 

Because in their eyes, softness and sensitivity in a male character is seen as authentic; it’s seen as a consequence of his unique personality. But softness and sensitivity in a female character is seen as expected, as stereotypical—it’s seen only a consequence of her gender. This is also why characters who are fathers are adored, while characters who are mothers are overlooked or scrutinized. Because a male character taking care of children is kindhearted, nurturing, selfless, compassionate. But a female character taking care of children is just doing her job.

Basically, I think many trans-identified females would like their softness and sensitivity to be viewed as authentically as we view softness and sensitivity in males. I think many trans-identified females crave for their characteristics to be viewed as consequences of their unique personalities, rather than consequences of their gender. They crave to be seen as human first and female second—not the other way around. 

[alargehunkofdebris]

the necessary anguish of the Good Omens 2 finale

Ah ok. So after 4 years of waiting post Season One and ten cumulative years of bookish fannery, I watched bonified New Content of Good Omens. And when those credits rolled, I sat there, not in my expected state of pleasant satisfaction, but in a state of abject shock.

I actually don’t know if I’ve ever had such a reaction to a show before. Or, rather, that I could still have such a reaction. I’m thirty, for goodness sakes – I was planning on being thrilled and charmed and entertained, not having my hands shake so much that it was hard to type a text. I wasn’t planning on losing an entire night of sleep because my heart wouldn’t stop pounding really hard, Neil. This was not expected. I had an estate sale to run the next day – by God, I needed that sleep.

 Anyway. These are my thoughts on the season, and on this upswell of mourning/unhappiness at such a gut-wrenching ending. As always, this are my dumb opinions and nothing more; take with a grain of salt, etc. 

I have seen a lot of suffering on Tumblr today. Everyone is in pain, and it makes sense. I, too, am in pain. But I might be in the minority, because I thanked God/Mr. Gaiman when things turned to pure pain in the end. Because narratively, despite the anguish we all feel, this is how it needs to be. And I was getting real worried there for a second.

When we have a mini-series (ie, a show with a set number of seasons) it can’t act the same as a series without a set end. We’ve got three potential seasons; therefore, they logically should behave like a three-act play, or the three acts in the standard Western movie/book plot. This middle season is the middle act, the second act. While it definitely doesn’t work exactly the same way, and needs its own story arc to work as a season, it is still functionally the middle part of one overarching plot.

And what usually happens near the end of the second act? All Is Lost, and the Dark Night of the Soul.

We NEED this to happen. This is what makes a plot delicious. If we’d had this perfect, lovely, romantic season where the stakes aren’t raised one bit and everything is fixed at the end, we would want for nothing and the gorgeous tension that keeps us waiting and watching would be lost. We wouldn’t feel that drive to create fanfics and fanart, we wouldn’t have the need to speculate or dream, because most of the tension was eased, and you just can’t have that if you want a highly anticipated third season. We’d have nothing huge and concrete to look forward to.

In fact, I was getting really worried once the Ineffable Bureaucracy started happening on screen, because I could see (I thought) past that bend in the road toward the end. I could see how this season might conclude, with big happy confessions of love and hugs and handholding (that’s all I expected, because I only expected the same chaste level of affection with both angelic/demonic couples) and then…then it’d all be over. What more could there be? I mean, there certainly could be more, but THIS is the main thing people waited for. The Happy Confession. The hug. The handholding. Whatever we got. And in my mind, having it now, at the end of season two, just wasn’t adding up – it did not fit. It couldn’t. No, we can’t have this now. It doesn’t work.

I get this peculiar thing that happens when things start getting too “everything is great!” in a story. I get the “someone needs to die” instinct. Instead of pure happiness that things are going great, there’s this feeling of intense discomfort, because I feel the weight of the shoe that’s failing to drop. I need it to drop, or else it throws off my entire standard-Western-narrative-trained brain’s balance. In the build up to The Scene, when things seem to be going swimmingly and heading directly towards the happiest and syrupiest of endings, I had to pause and pace my living room and roll around on the floor to alleviate the sheer build up of stress. Things can’t go this well. They can’t. There hasn’t been enough bad things, this is too sweet, too much. Can’t handle it. This can’t just be pure wish-fulfillment at this point; Good Omens shouldn’t work that way, it never has. We’d be happy in the moment, but then it’ll ultimately be a let down. No more danger. Nothing keeping them apart. No more tension, no more story. It was all too easy.

And then, finally, that shoe dropped. After a season of mainly getting along and being just thrilled with each other, they began to really argue. Things got horrific and serious, and I literally let out a breath of relief. I was able to watch without pausing every two minutes for a breather. Ok. Things weren’t over. This wasn’t the end. We had more to wait for.

And then it went on. The confession started, but in that gorgeously wrong way. And for the first time that season, I was actually feeling the stress of the story. Yes, there was danger throughout this season, but it was always layered with humour and wit. You didn’t get a demon scene without them doing something hilariously stupid. You didn’t get an angel scene without them being delightfully out-of-touch. The stakes were high, but they weren’t allowed to get EXTREMELY high. We never thought there was any question of them getting out of scrapes unscathed, because it was never all serious.

Never…until now. There was zero humour at this point. After 6 episodes of being pleasantly delighted, I was feeling the dread. However, I still thought I knew where it was going.  

See, I thought I had it figured out. If I had any extra money, I would have bet some of it. I knew that, whilst they’d likely have some kind of subtle confession of love and caring, and perhaps a touch – a hug, or a hand-hold (like Gabe and Beez) – I knew we couldn’t expect a kiss. This is a story thirty-three years in the making, and it’s always been in that grey area. They weren’t humans; they didn’t necessarily show affection that way. Besides that, we’ve had so many TV shows that get close, but rarely ones that go all the way to smoochville. OFMD was one of the very first, but it was new. It wasn’t an old, established story from the 90s like this is. It didn’t have decades-old fans waiting with bated breath for canon content. For Good Omens, we heard it time and time again in interviews; it’s a kind of love story. They had this kind of marriage. They cared for each other. They had a bromance. It’s close, but never quite there. So I thought I knew exactly how this would go, and would be thrilled with what we got. 

And then it absolutely didn’t go that way. It went exactly as far as so many hoped. And it went there like a knife to the gut.

And it was perfect.

Goddamn, what a season ending. Despite my lack of appetite and failure to sleep, I could not be happier with what Mr. Gaiman did. I am screaming crying throwing up and I’m thrilled about it.

The middle of a story is typically what drags; it never holds the highest stakes. Lord knows what we’re going to get in season three (knocking on wood), but I can only expect it to get bigger and heavier. And by God and/or Satan, am I prepared, in this deliciously painful purgatory, to wait and see.  

[familyabolisher]

hi! i'm a follower, & i enjoy reading your posts and essays. in your recent post about the anti-intellectualism kerfuffle on tumblr, you said, "Part of my communism means believing in the abolition of the university; this is not an ‘anti-intellectual’ position but a straightforwardly materialist one."

i haven't heard of university abolition before, and if you are willing, i would like to hear what it's about. what is the university abolitionist image of a better alternative to universities? should learning still be centralized?

thanks for your consideration. :)

University abolition, as with any other form of abolition worth its salt, understands the role played by the institution of the university under capitalism in sustaining the conditions of capitalist-imperialist hegemony, analyses the institution accordingly, and recognises that the practices that the university purports to represent (that of intellectual production, the sharing and developing of knowledge) will undergo a fundamental overhaul and reconstitution under communism. This means looking at the university not merely as an organic institution wherein we study and develop ideas, but asking what ideas are developed and legitimised, and who is afforded the opportunity to do so, and why the university exists in the first place; we are taking a materialist rather than idealist approach. 

Simply put, the role of the university is to restrict access to knowledge and knowledge production, and to ensure the continuance of class divides and hierarchised labour. These restrictions come about in a vast number of ways; the most immediately obvious is the fact that one must meet a certain set of criteria in order to qualify for entrance in the first place, and this criteria tends to require compliance with the schooling system (itself another such arm of capitalist governance), a certain amount of wealth (and/or a willingness to accrue debt), and an ability to demonstrate methods of intellectual engagement compliant with the standard of the academy. Obviously, there are massive overlaps in this set of criteria; those who come from wealthier backgrounds are more likely to have had a good education and thus can better demonstrate normative intellectual engagement, those who can demonstrate that engagement have probably complied with the schooling system, and so on. The logic behind the existence of private schools is the idea that sufficient wealth can near-enough secure your child's entry into the university and therefore entry into the wealthier classes as an adult, with the most prestigious institutions overrun by students from privately educated backgrounds. Already, you can see how this is a tactic that filters out people from marginalised backgrounds; if you’re too poor, too un[der]educated, too disabled, not white enough, &c. &c., your chances of admittance into higher education grow slimmer and slimmer.

Access to the university affords access to knowledge; most literally through institutional access to books, papers, libraries, but also through participation in lectures and seminars, reading lists, first-hand contact with active academics, the opportunity to produce work and receive feedback on it, the opportunity to develop your own ideas in a socially legitimised sphere. As I explained above, who is afforded access to such knowledge is stratified and limited; the institution is hostile to anyone deemed socially disposable under capitalism. Access to the university also affords access to a university degree, with which you can continue down the research path (and thus participate in the cycle of radical knowledge-production being absorbed and defanged by the academy, and water down your own ideas to make them palatable to institutions which tend to balk at anything with serious Marxist commitments), or gain entry to better-paid, more stable, more prestigious jobs than those which people without degrees are most often relegated to. In this sense, the people who are more likely to be able to meet the access criteria for the university and then successfully participate in it are able to retain their class position (or else promulgate the myth of social mobility as a solution to mass impoverishment) and thus gain a vested interest in maintaining the conditions of hegemony. Those who gain entry into the middle class have done so after undergoing a process of stratification according to means; which is to say, class, race, [dis]ability; and tend to lose interest in defending a politic which seeks to destabilise their relatively privileged position in the pecking order.

Success in a research career, too, depends upon liberties afforded by wealth; can you afford to go to all these conferences, do low-paid and insecure teaching work in the university, churn out research, and support yourself through a postgrad degree without going insane? Not if you don’t have independent means. In the UK, the gap between undergrad and masters funding is absolutely wild—obviously there are scholarships afforded to a limited number of people (another access barrier—the whole institution runs on the myth of artificial scarcity), but broadly speaking, it’s pretty much impossible to put yourself through an MA with just the money you get from SFE unless you work a lot on the side to pay your bills (this is what I tried to do; I went insane and dropped out, lmfao) or have independent wealth. Establishing oneself as an ‘academic’ is simply easier when you have financial security. In this way, the people who make it to the very top of academia (the MAs, the PhDs) tend to be people who come from privileged backgrounds; people who are less likely to challenge hegemony, who will maintain the essential conditions by which the university sustains itself, which is to say the conditions of social stratification. These people often tend to hold reactionary positions on class—the people who are outraged at how little a stipend postgrad students get tend not to think twice about the university’s cleaners being paid minimum wage, or think of working-class jobs as shameful failstates from which their academic qualifications have allowed them to escape (how many people have you heard get absolutely aghast at the thought of ‘[person with a BA/MA/PhD] working a typically working-class job’?). Academic success tends to engender buying into the mythology of academia as a class stratifier and class stratification as indicative of one’s value, even amongst people who probably call themselves academic Marxists.

Universities are also tangible forces of counterinsurgency. I live in the UK, where universities are huge drivers of gentrification; university towns and cities will welcome mass student populations, usually from predominantly middle-class backgrounds and often coming to cities with significant working-class and immigrant communities, neighbourhoods formerly home to those communities will be effectively cleaned out so that students can live there, and the whole character of the neighbourhood changes to accommodate people from well-off backgrounds who harbour classist, racist feelings towards the locals & who will assimilate into the salaried middle-class once they graduate. More liberally-oriented universities will tend to espouse putatively progressive positions whilst making no effort to forge a relationship with grassroots movements happening on the streets of the city they’re set up in; student politics absorbs anyone with even slightly radical inclinations whilst accomplishing approximately fuck-all save for setting a few people off on the NGO track; like, the institution defangs radical potential whilst contributing to the class stratification of the city it’s set up in. 

This is without even touching on the role played by the university in maintaining conditions of imperialism and neocolonialism, both through academic output regarding colonised regions (from ‘Oriental studies’ to the proliferation of white academics who specialise in ‘Africa’ to the use of the Global South as something of a playground for white Global North academics to conduct their research to the history of epistemologies such as race science as transparently fortifying and legitimating the imperialist order) and through material means of restricting access to and production of knowledge based on country of origin (universities in the Global South are significantly limited in what academic output they can access compared to those in the Global North; engagement with Global North academia relies on the ability to move freely, something that is restricted by one’s passport; language barriers and the primacy of English in the Global North academy) keeping knowledge production in the Global South dependent on the hegemony of the North. Syed Farid Alatas has termed this ‘academic dependency,’ as a corollary to dependency theory; academia in the GS is shaped by the material dependence it has on the West, which in turn restricts the kind of academic work that can be undertaken in the first place. Ultimately, all institutions under capitalism must ultimately reroute back to the conditions that favour capitalism, and the university is not an exception.

This is just a very brief overview of an expansive topic; I would recommend going away and examining in greater detail the role played by the university under capitalism, and what the institution filters out, and why. What sort of research gets funding? What sort of knowledge gains social legitimacy? What can the university absorb and what must it reject? Who is producing knowledge and to whom are they accountable? etc.

[jiraisupportgroup]

why do you get to sit in your heated home with daddy’s money and tell everyone who can and can’t wear jirai kei?

I don’t usually respond to stuff like this, especially because I’m fairly certain this was just ripped from a popular j-fashion creators video, but:

I feel like I make it quite clear that when I talk about jirai kei it’s just my opinions. I openly state that I’m likely a dumbass and you should take my word with a grain of salt considering I’m not a spokesperson for the Jirai Kei community, I’m not an expert on Jirai Kei, I also don’t speak Japanese so I can’t rly access a lot of “OG” jirai kei content that launched the community.

Additionally: I’ve never stated that anyone can’t wear anything. The closest I’ve gotten to that is when I state that I don’t generally believe “jirai kei” is the appropriate term for the fashion (therefore you can’t rly “wear it” if we want to be super technical) or when I said that “fashion jirais” who complain about the community can fuck off.

Never at any point in that did I say that anyone can’t wear anything. If you want to wear girly kei or dark girly or larme or ryousangata or whatever the fuck you want to wear - by all means please do. My main point is if you don’t like the jirai kei community, don’t interact with it. You can post coords and find friends and have a lot of fun with the clothing if that’s want you want to do. You can buy Liz Lisa & MCM bags and generally live your best ryousangata life. You don’t have to interact with the jirai kei community to do that. Block the people you find annoying. Block tags, block accounts, block whatever you don’t want to see. No one is going to be mad at you for not wanting to interact with the “dark side” of jirai kei (as people love to call it for some reason) UNLESS you’re adamantly saying “the dark side is wrong” and then using a shitload of jirai-related tags. Other tags for these clothes exist. Separate the two if you want, I don’t give a fuck; jirai kei doesn’t own the clothing.

I’m not going to sit here and outright defend people in the jirai kei community posting people’s coords and bullying them, I’m not gunna sit here and defend the fatphobic or racist things that have been said on jirai kei twt. I will point out that those posts are not actually super common in the jirai kei community, and the people that post them generally aren’t very well liked by other landmines either, they also tend to be very young. It’s a really big community. There are going to be “bad apples” especially because it’s a community based around mental health issues. You can’t look at that handful of posts and say “the entire community is toxic and awful”. Venting & the like are very common, but it’s pretty rare that I see people actively posting hate like that, and there is a huge difference between the two. Most of the landmines I see are too scared to even make vague callout posts. Maybe that’s just Tumblr, idk, but honestly the amount of hate I see in this community is rather small.

Secondarily to your point; my house is not fucking heated. I can barely afford to run the AC in the summer or the heat in the winter - typically I turn it on when my BF is here and turn it off when he leaves to save money. I have my own apartment. I work for my own apartment. I can barely fucking afford it. I make about $2700 a month and my bills add up to be about $2400 a month (and it’s not like an expensive or nice apartment it’s literally full of roaches and my oven doesn’t work). I usually end up spending about $100 of the leftover on cat food, and then have $200 left over for gas to get to work AND food AND toiletries for the MONTH.

I don’t have “daddy’s money”. I live by myself about 8 hours away from my family; they don’t have shit to send me. My dad died 3 years ago and left us with 50k in debt because he decided paying taxes was optional. When that happened - I was making 17.50 an hour and I had the HIGHEST WAGE out of anyone in my family. I was trying to finish college which I was attending on a scholarship bc I couldn’t fucking afford it, I was working overtime, trying to organize my dad’s funeral bc no one else in my family could do it, and paying tax payments. “Daddy’s money” was a negative sum. I frequently send leftover cash to my family if there is any just to help them in any way I can.

The cute and nice things I can afford are typically bought either because I pick up overnight shifts at my secondary serving job or from sugar daddies. Although I stopped sugaring about 3 years ago.

I started working when I was 15. I started SW when I was 17 to help my family pay rent. I did SW from about 17 years old to 21 and stopped shortly after my father died because I didn’t have the time anymore. And I fucking hated it but it made money.

Don’t fucking come at me saying I’ve got a nice house and daddy’s money when I’m sitting in a roach-infested apartment that I work myself to the fucking bone for & I spent multiple years trying to pay off my dad’s debt.

Fuck right off with that dude.

[lola-andheruniverse]

Anon who asked me about "sides" in the caryl fandom and which one I place myself on because you believe I "switched sides"/changed my opinions:

I'm not posting your ask because you named people and that's not something I do on my blog or generally agree with. The only instance you'll find me naming or tagging people is in fic recs posts, so that caryl authors who are on Tumblr can read them and be found by readers who'd like to reach out.

If you have a problem with the opinions, feelings and/or behaviors of a particular individual/blog, I ask you to 1) please reach out to them directly so you can express your disagreement or 2) use your block button, so you no longer see content you don't like. I believe that our fandom is big enough to hold every single caryler out there who wants to join in, regardless of their opinions, posts or feelings. People should feel free and safe to post whatever they want, either 'positive' or 'negative'. I have no problem with anyone in the fandom and I respect everyone's opinions, even when I disagree with some stuff I read.

Please, I ask you to not use my ask box to indirectly badmouth, bully or attack any caryler.

That said, the answer to your question is after the cut.

I'm not on either "side" and never have been. I'm just another enthusiastic fan that loves Carol and Daryl. Since joining the Tumblr fandom just before the pandemic (I was a lurker for many years), I've been using my own critical thinking skills and knowledge of AMC's shenanigans to form my own opinions.

I'm confident in TBOC because I believe there are concrete reasons that support how I'm feeling, from Melissa's return, to filming spoilers and rumors, to Tribeca and SDCC. You're free to agree or disagree with my interpretation of these facts, and to feel positive or negative about it.

I also continue to believe that AMC/Gimple hijacked the original caryl spinoff to highlight the richonne spinoff because it follows similar decisions made before to give Rick more screen time at the expense of all the other TWD characters. I believe Melissa had no choice but to opt out of the original spin-off and negotiate new terms to ensure that Carol's (and therefore Caryl's) story was respected and told with integrity. To me, that's why there were things to be sorted out, as she said, and why she lengthily discussed Carol with Zabel and co. even before scripts for the France spinoff were written. She was involved since the beginning, yes, but she only signed on when she got what she wanted. There is no greater supporter of Carol than Melissa and we have known this for years. I'm glad she's back in her own terms. I believe it was a pretty difficult time for her, as she expressed it by basically refusing to promote 11C or the series finale, and by not saying anything about the whole mess on SM, while other cast members/friends such as Laurie Holden and Khary Payton spoke out in her behalf.

I believe AMC tried to make money off just Daryl because he's their original character and it backfired in their faces. They also made a mistake using Norman to save face as he should have been protected from the SM backlash. Norman has never been a reliable narrator and I always take every thing he says with a grain of salt, but I don't think he's intentionally malicious. I appreciate how much he loves Daryl and is considerate of his fans, even when I don't approve of his behavior. I just wish he would keep his frustrating mouth shut. I believe Norman had lots of input in S1 and that he initially thought he could pull it off without Melissa. But there's no Daryl without Carol and no Carol without Daryl. It's crystal clear how much Norman's happy for having Melissa by his side, and how much they love each other and are excited for S2. I'm glad they are reunited, both for them and for us, but I believe everything worked out in the end because Melissa didn't give up on getting what she wanted. I believe she had lots of inputs in S2 and is satisfied and happy with the final result.

So, that's how I believe things have gone these last two years. Again, feel free to agree or disagree with my interpretation of facts. None of us will ever know exactly what happened, but each of us can decide what to believe based on our own judgment of the facts. That's what I do and will continue to do.

In the end, for me, the important thing is that Melissa and Norman are happy and that Carol and Daryl get their hard-earned happy ending. It's everything I ever wanted and I'm going to enjoy it. I hope you enjoy it too.

That's it. Caryl on!

[pbnmj]

Genuinely curious, what’s up with Noir’s age? And what does it have to do with his 08/09 run? ((You may ignore if you wish :D))

i no longer have to do an extremely long explaination about comics noir because it has already been done here, by foolsocracy!!!!!!! really great breakdown of his very vague age, which is never said outright in the 08-09 run, only implied!! my own personal take on this is that he's 17-turning-18 in the first one, just about graduated high school but not able to afford college (see the panel below LOL)

this also got a little longer than i thought it would, so under the cut for the rest of it! the tl:dr is "itsv!noir is not the same as comics!noir, and people saying that he's 19 isn't strictly true. to me, he's around 30!"

eyes without a face (the 09 run!!) only takes place 8 months after, in september 1933, which makes peter 18-turning-19. this is more of a headcanon though!! (see the noir birthday poll, which made me a noir-is-a-december-baby truther)

(peter being a libra is mentioned once in the first issue of amazing spider-man (2015), mostly as a punchline, and a specific date of october 10th was given in another issue that i have lost. other media, like with the mcu, has his birthday on august 10th. but to me noir is a sagittarius and you cannot pry that from me)

the 2020 run of noir begins establishing the year as 1939, making peter around his mid-20s, and 25 if you believe me on the 'peter was 17 in noir 2008' LOL.... i won't lie though i haven't read this one properly i very quickly skimmed so pinch of salt regarding my takes on the 2020 run

noir being in his teens during the first original runs is why "itsv!noir is 17-19" goes around so often! i've seen that on tumblr, twitter AND on tiktok and i don't mind what people hc, but it has become a pet peeve when people say it like its canon even though it's never been mentioned by the writers or the art book. itsv!noir is similar to his comic counterpart, but his differences in his origin story make me interpret him as a different noir (like how peter b.'s dimension is 616B, making him... 90214B?)

again, we are straying from itsv canon/etc here because i'm deranged, but i personally hc noir as being 32! some of my friends think he's in his mid-20s, others think he's older, but really the only reason is that 32 is the midpoint between the other two peter parkers: ripeter was 26 and peter b is 38. he's also voiced by nic cage, which makes me think older in the first place!

i just like the idea that he's more experienced that ripeter, but hasn't gone through as much as peter b. he spends most of the movie being broody ("moral ambiguity of your actions!", "matches burn down to my fingertips", etc etc), or snarkier than you'd expect ("it's that easy" "who are you again?" "you gonna fight or are you just bumping gums" etc etc). he also very sweetly tells everyone that he loves them before he leaves !!! i feel like it can in fact be in character for a peter parker in his late 20-early 30s, distanced from his tragedies in his own world by time (he doesn't forget them, that's different !) being able to look out for the spiders around him.

okay now we are VERY deep into hc territory, but it makes him able to balance out the rest of the itsv spider-gang as an older-brother figure who's able to guide peni, miles and gwen but also be able to act as a voice of reason for peter b. and ham if the sitauation calls for it. that being said noir is still peter parker and is therefore capable of spider-esque tomfoolery, which can lead to him misjudging the need for a snarky one liner ("this is a pretty hard core origin story"). my characterisation of him is also very inspired by heyitsspiderman, the itsv fic that changed me for the better, and noir isn't even in it that much LOL

veering back into itsv!noir's age and your actual question though: he's always read older in the movies, and not at all 17-19. noir is always going to be around 30 (32 if i have to give a number) to me!! if anything, he did go through the same kind of 'canon events' as comics noir did, but is an older and more experienced version of him, with tweaks to the backstory (like a radioactive spider instead of a spider-god, and webshooters instead of organic webbing). there are reasons ofc to see him being younger (egg creams are non-alcoholic, and that if it's 1933, his comicsverse self would be 18-19 too) . however you must consider that sony didn't expand on this and therefore it's up to fan interpretation and also that

[dailycharacteroption]

Mummy (Pathfinder Second Edition Archetype)

(art by Uriak on DeviantArt)

And it’s time for another archetype from Book of the Dead that lets you play an undead character! This time it’s a pretty interesting one in that we’re looking at: mummies!

Mummies have been in RPGs since the beginning, but their presence as undead creatures is actually relatively recent compared to the age of the culture they come from. That’s right, there are straight up no stories of mummies rising from their grave to torment the living in Ancient Egypt, presumably because a mummy, by necessity, was one that had undergone all the proper rites of death and therefore didn’t have any reason for stories of them rising and complaining about it.

Heck, even The Curse of the Pharaohs, the idea that those that dare disturb the tombs of kings would be cursed with a painful death is fairly recent, with the closest thing we actually have from the various dynasties and periods of the nation being warnings to not disturb or desecrate the tombs and sarcophagi of a pharaoh lest they lose the favor of the gods, but those are more akin to having the awareness to realize that your successor is probably gonna deface any statue of you they can find and strike your name from all records they can get ahold of, because that happened a lot.

The actual undead mummy is actually a creation of foreign writers, going as far back as the 1840s with Gautier’s The Mummy’s Foot, and 60 years later with Bram Stoker’s (yes, that Bram Stoker) The Jewel of the Seven Stars, along with others in that period like Arthur Conan Doyle, and so on.

Curiously, most of these undead mummies were not monsters per se, having no hostile intentions towards mortals, but rather, were often love interests for the protagonists, which smacks of elements of the exotification and sexualization of the East, which is unfortunate. On the other hand, if there’s any online community that can emphasize with the idea of dating an immortal being from a bygone era, it’s tumblr. This focus on desire also explains why even more horror-focused mummy fiction often gives the mummies ways to “rehydrate”, regenerating themselves into a fleshy, lifelike form, if only temporarily and usually at the expense of some poor sap, cursed or otherwise.

Mummies as horror monsters didn’t really start until the 1930’s with Boris Karloff in the Universal Studios The Mummy movie, and even that retains the notion of the mummy regaining a semblance of life, since he only spends one scene of the movie as a shambling corpse and the rest as an offputting older gentleman who politely insists not to be touched.

Beyond that, mummies in fiction have ranged from being similar undead sorcerers to being particularly dusty zombies that may or may not have a would-be necromancer commanding them, and their appearance in tabletop games has similarly varied.

In Pathfinder, the generally accepted paradigm is that mummies range in power from the basic variety, which were typically mere servants or mummified accidentally by extreme outdoor conditions such as bogs, deserts, or extreme altitudes, whereas greater mummies (represented by the Osirian Mummy and Mummified creature templates in First Edition) were a step above, retaining their skills and sense of self. Meanwhile, at the pinnacle were mummy lords, created from the bodies and souls of the most powerful and magically-skilled pharaohs.

However, a detail that was brought into focus with Second Edition was that mummies, no matter what culture they belong to or where they are found, are undead tied to the land, which makes sense due to the way that every mummification process involves at least some level of environmental process, from being soaked in anaerobic bog water/peat to being desiccated by the sun or natron salts, and so on. That connection is what gives many mummies their strange powers over the environments they hail from (like conjuring sandstorms or turning into clouds of sand and the like). Of course, that connection also subtly taints the natural world around them wherever they go, given their status as undead beings.

While it is possible to play a character who underwent the ritual to become a mummy in recent times (either just after death or more horrifyingly while still alive), the nature of this archetype lends itself better to playing a time-displaced undead character who only just woke up from their eternal rest. Whether you’re a millenia-old citizen of a now-defunct desert kingdom or some poor explorer that died in a bog and only clawed their way out a century later when someone accidentally stepped on their head while wading through the muck, there’s a lot of potential there.

So let’s take a look, shall we?

Like all undead archetypes and certain other spellcasting ones, you can technically take this archetype at first level, but must obviously take the dedication as your 2nd level feat. In this case, the dedication provides the basic undead benefits, as well as increased physical durability at the cost of fire vulnerability. Additionally, their unarmed strike becomes stronger as they pull water from their targets on contact. Meanwhile, they also establish a bond with an extreme terrain predominant to the region they were mummified within, which determines the aesthetics of later abilities as well as what terrain certain other abilities function with.

Case in point, most are able to stride through difficult terrain in their bonded environment with ease, as well as see through concealment within it as well, be it the snowstorms of the arctic or mountains, the sand of deserts, or the fogs of the marsh.

Whether it be from their strikes or from another ability, they can use the moisture drawn from other creatures to trigger a transformation, regaining a semblance of life and vitality for a short time.

Many also develop the greater benefits of undeath, as well as resistance to actively harmful aspects of their bonded terrain as well.

Whether they were mummified alive or merely endured the traumas of their soul being bound to their corpse, the process of becoming an undead mummy is filled with anguish, which they can then weaponize in one of their more infamous abilities as an aura of despair. While not yet potent enough to paralyze with fear, it can send foes fleeing.

While this archetype can’t grant true mummy rot, they can inflict a withering necromantic affliction on foes when they get a particularly lucky blow on foes, consuming their vitality and body while it lasts.

Some of these mummies can call upon atmospheric phenomena from their bonded region to summon concealing storms of mist, sand, and the like, making their presence obvious but their exact position impossible to determine, making for a useful defense.

Those of a warrior disposition often learn to channel their lesser curse through weapons rather than their limbs.

While otherwise ordinary cloth, many mummies can infuse some of their malevolence into their wrappings to briefly animate them, following up a strike to entrap foes with them.

Taking their bond with the terrain further, some learn to actually become the terrain, turning into flying clouds of an appropriate substrate such as mist, snow, sand, bog water, and the like.

In a horrific display of their mastery of moisture and life force, powerful mummies can suck both right out of foes in a wide conical area with a horrid inhalation, harming them and healing themselves.

Finally, some refine their despair aura so they can do so more often, and those that are especially affected are outright paralyzed with fear for a few critical moments.

The mummy archetype does a good job of emulating the powers most commonly associated with undead mummies in a balanced way, and can certainly be fun for any sort of character without requiring you to invest super heavily into it. If the game takes place in a lot of set pieces covering their favored terrain, it can be quite powerful if you spec for that, or you can just focus on being an especially tanky undead melee character. Certainly the despair ability is useful for every character, and being able to enshroud oneself or turn into clouds of particulate is useful for close and ranged characters alike. As such, there is no one specific build for this archetype, but you can choose to add it’s benefits to whatever build you’re going for.

Like I said before, it is entirely possible to play a truly ancient undead with this archetype, which opens up some interesting roleplaying opportunities. Obviously culture clash between your original culture and those that exist in the modern era is one, but also consider the knowledge that you bring with you from your old life. After all, undead mummies have included royalty, high priests, mages, and more in fiction, so their perspective can be interesting.

His hairs all fallen out long ago and his husk as dry as an old waybread wafer, Nshantu the Ensnared is the oldest storyteller among the anandi, though that’s hardly an impressive boast since he ventured high into the mountains to become a mummy. Still, the silk-bound arachnid boasts the deepest pool of knowledge in the region, which he will share with those who offer him information in exchange.

In their quest to  defeat the risen pharaoh that has kidnapped their patron, whom he believes is a reincarnation of his lover, the party finds a lead in references to one of his old servants, a jaathoom, or djinn genie who still dwells on the material plane.

Ever since the party made it through Blackwater Bog, something has been following them. They sometimes sense something on the edge of the firelight that vanishes when they try to find it, and just yesterday the woman they’ve been escorting found a muddy handprint on her bag. But is this stalker foe, or friend?

[paeliae-occasionally]

pae pae, what is one piece of lore you’ve been gate keeping, and why?

pls go on a tangent

Hello love, sorry this took me a little while to get to. Real life :( but in return you get the longest rant I have ever put on tumblr so I hope you are proud of yourself. (Also why have I been keeping it secret? It just hasn’t come up and it is a whole story so buckle up.)

Lore time…

Ok so the lore we are talking about today is Where are the gods??? There were gods but now they are gone. This is broken into 3 events: The Separation, The Dissolution and The Accords (including magestones)

The Past

In the past there were hundreds of gods who roamed the mortal plane. Gods of elements, life and death travelled there to shape the world as they saw it.

As the world developed, the latent simple components of thought and souls began to settle into creatures of the earth.

This created a race of humans, who were the first beings who had souls yet so little innate energy that it would not sustain their bodies forever.

With the rise of humans, Gods of thought and memory grew in power and purpose as more thinking creatures were formed. They had a whole new domain to weave.

The Separation

At this time any magic done by mortals was cast from their own tiny energy store so was small enough to be unnoticeable. The gods intended to keep them to their small powers so that they could never rival the gods in terms of power.

One of the Eldest gods, Ezemhaziel god of controlled magic, traveled the earth trying to create a new way to control magic, the runes. He found a mortal Rin, who seemed to have a talent for magic and a creativity that could help in his work.

Ez created a bond with Rin to share some of his large energy store between them, this is called a Laren bond. Ez later taught him to cast straight from the world around him, similar to how modern mages cast. The pair grew closer and became almost inseparable.

A group of gods watched in disdain as this mortal gained the ability to cast powerful magic. They hated the idea of the narrowing differences between morals and gods, so they decided to remove the threat to their power. These gods gathered and when Rin next left Ez’s side they drew a group of mortals together to kill him.

Rin was attacked by the mortals. He called out to Ez, who came but the gods held him back, and kept him out of Rin’s sight. Rin was killed by the mob. Ez tried to save him with every power he possessed but could not reach him in time. Ez then cursed the gods and the runes and left the mortal plane.

During the encounter Ez pulled so much magic to himself that he formed a concentrated area of Ike, (magic) so much that the mortals could feel the magic that hung in the air around them. These mortals eventually discovered methods to harness the magic around them and became the first druids. Further down the line they also train the first mages. So despite the gods’ efforts (and largely because of them) the mortals get access to more powerful magic. Even though this is all the other gods’ fault, they blame Ez for creating the magic dense area and summon him to a trial.

In his grief Ez does not return to the world so the gods decide that it is reasonable to kill all mortals who have acquired magic and salt the earth where the collection of magic is.

The gods start to go about enacting this, but many other gods are against the idea of culling mortals. This resentment builds especially in gods who rely on mortals as their domain. Gods of memory, thought, fear, illusions and names stand up for the mortals who act as the medium of their power.

The gods who require mortals and therefore prevent the slaughter called themselves the Azeraad, and the gods with no need for mortal creatures label themselves Dieral.

For generations there is a stalemate with a few gods killing and protecting mortals, but most remaining still to prevent a large scale godly war.

The Dissolution

In the decades while the gods watch each other, mortals develop more innovative and powerful magic and build up mage cities. In their development the mages do not forget the massacres that the early Dieral gods committed and plan revenge. They begin work on becoming immortal to further show their power as equals to the gods. Secretly a group develops weapons to use against immortals.

The mage city of Laith’Seyleren is the centre of immortality research and the forefront of magic development when the Dierals finally take notice.

The Dierals break the stalemate to ensure mortals never discover immortality. They destroy the entire city of Laith’Seyleren utterly, no one survives. The other mage cities don’t even find out until a day later when a group of diplomats teleport into a wasteland of rubble and ash.

After this the Mages and the Azeraad gods declare outright war on the Dierals.

The war rages in the deserts to the north west of the Illeri lands with the dieral gods building temples on the mountains to the east and the mages building tall thin mage towers to the west.

Hundreds of mages die in an altogether uneven battle until one mage Muliva Kazi invents a way to bind gods and trap them in Demi-planes then cut the plane off into the aether beyond. This entirely changes the battle as the gods can now be killed. Even the Azeraad gods who fought with the mages were uncomfortable with these machines.

During the battle, a group of mages and Azeraad gods have been working together to end the war but after Kazi’s machines are invented they gain the support of some minor Dieral gods as well.

One member of this group, Paeliae of Laith’Tielere, plans to carry a peace treaty into the temple of the Dieral god of light who leads their forces.

While Paeliae travels through the desert into the walls of godly defences, Ezemhaziel wakes up. He sees the war and the suffering of the mortals and gods and calls on all of the power he could not reach so many years ago to kill the God of light.

He succeeds and takes the fallen god’s seat in the Dieral hall.

Paeliae finds him there and presents him with the treaty. Ez agrees to negotiations of peace and calls the Dierals and Azeraad gods back from the war to meet.

As soon as these words have left Ez’s mouth Paeliae falls to the ground, broken by journey but fulfilled in his purpose. Ez swears one last promise to remember the fallen mortal.

The Accords (Magestones)

The Gods and a collection of mortal mages gather for peace negotiations after years of war.

A compromise is reached where some magic will be bound away so it can no longer be used by the mages or gods.

Magic was bound in giant engraved rocks called magestones. These were made of a translucent stone that glowed and hummed with power. Bindings ran like water across the surface of the stone keeping the magic contained.

Specifically magic relating to immortality, time, and the type of godly binding that Muliva Kazi invented were all collected in magestones so they could not be used again.

Particular war criminals, both gods and mages were also bound in magestones to appease both sides and as a reminder so that a war on this scale would never happen again.

In exchange for the mages giving up large portions of their magic, the gods who fought in the war agreed to leave the mortal plane and return back to their home planes. While in their home planes they can only help their followers indirectly, I.e. creating bonds that are incredibly weak due to the long distance.

Modern Day

So in the modern day the magestones are well established. Mages are taught about the magic restrictions and a few horror stories of people who tried to perform that magic and were absorbed into the magestones. There are a few magestones in Zairel that come up in the Xaeren WIP which is fun.

There are a couple of occasions of gods breaking their pacts and entering the mortal plane and one instance of a god breaking out from a magestone. (He is trapped again eventually, this starts the mist war.) —————————————————————————

Hope you liked the PAGES of lore. There is more but this was already the longest tumblr post I have ever made so that will have to wait.

Tagging the Tag List~ which is new for me:

@thelovelymachinery, @an-indecisive-nerd, @the-letterbox-archives, @oliolioxenfreewrites and @winvyre

[bracketsoffear]

Moby Dick (Moby Dick) "Okay, look--let's get this out of the way. I know that the whale is big. That is not an insignificant thing about whales in general and this whale in particular. It's not even an insignificant factor in nominating him today. Except, it's not the size that matters--it's what Herman Melville does with it*.

*(Sorry, the dick joke was obligatory. It should be the only one unless my love of bad puns runs away from me.)

There's a post floating out there on tumblr calling Moby Dick the OG eldritch terror. Unfortunately, we all know how the hellsite's search "function" is (exasperated but affectionate), so I'm not going to be able to link it. What I can do is pull out a few rusty tools of literary analysis to show that at his Vast heart, Moby Dick represents the terrifying insignificance of humanity in the face of the grandness and terror of the sea.

First, it's crucial to point out that the book opens with quotes about whales, including several Bible verses, some Pliny, something purported to be copied down by a ninth-century king, Shakespeare, and so on. Right out of the gate, the book connects the Whale with the idea of the mythological Leviathan. By quoting Genesis in particular, Melville creates the idea of the Whale as a beast that has existed alongside humanity since its inception. Just as the fears are ancient and have tormented humanity since prehistory, the Whale/Leviathan has represented a "dragon of the sea" that mankind cannot conquer.

Sailors who make their living killing the whales are aware that " all the other things, whether beast or vessel, that enter into the dreadful gulf of this monster’s (whale’s) mouth, are immediately lost and swallowed up" and that "[t]he great Leviathan […] maketh the seas to seethe like boiling pan." They can't escape, though, because as the extracts also make clear, the booming economy of the nineteenth century depends on whale oil for everything from healing bruises to heating rooms in the dead of winter. The sailors are therefore helpless in the face of the dangers that the Whale's sheer size escapes, but also the vast and impersonal economic machinery that reduces them to commodities to be sacrificed to the Whale's wrath, Ahab's vengeance, and the Industrial Revolution's greed. Simon Fairchild probably had a field day with this one.

I realize I'm nearly 400 words in, so in the interest of sparing people's eyes, I'll wrap up by pointing out: --There is a whole chapter devoted to the crew standing knee-deep in whale fat while they dissect a smaller whale. --There is another chapter where Ishmael rhapsodizes about the size of a whale's skeleton. --Then he goes on for another chapter about whale fossils. --And then chapter 3 in this trilogy (which began in chapter 103, btw), asks outright in the title. "Does the whale's magnitude diminish?" --Ishmael sees the sea, and by extension, the Whale, as an irresistible, almost compelling force that terrifies and awes him. This is similar to noted Vast victim Robert Kelly, who also feels a draw to the Vast. --The book closes with Ishmael as the only survivor of the Pequod, having barely escaped the whale's vortex that pulled the ship and all her crew into the depths of the ocean, floating alone on his subtextual lover's coffin for a day and night before finally being picked up by another ship."

Joy Wang/Jobu Tupaki (Everything Everywhere All At Once) "Jobu is able to comprehend the entire scale of humanity in every corner of the multiverse, and it's all… Meaningless. You see when you put literally everything on a bagel when you're bored one day - every report card, every breed of dog, every ad on Craigslist, every grain of salt or seed - it collapses in on itself and you realize… We are all so small and insignificant that nothing we do matters. And when nothing matters, all of the pain and guilt you feel at your life going nowhere just goes away. It's sucked into a bagel.

A cult is formed around this bagel - all the other people that Jobu has shown the truth to - but what she really wants is her mother to understand how empty she really feels."

[pinkheartstaroffriendship]

Rekindling the Flame: I'm Back and Ready to Share!

Hey, everyone! ✨

It has been another week of taking a break from posting stuff on Tumblr.

I’m excited to share that I’m back and ready to reconnect with all of you and I'm ready to post anything I can put my heart into.

However, before I could start posting stuff again,

I want to address and express my feelings about what happened in the past couple of weeks regarding my AI Art to everyone on Tumblr, especially to every Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends fan blog on Tumblr. Recently, nobody liked the content of my AI Art, I felt like I couldn't be accepted and respected as a fellow Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends Fan; I ended up being rejected somewhat and feeling like a loser and an outcast to everyone, even to Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends Fan Tumblr Blogs because of my AI-generated art, Therefore, which caused me to stop posting my AI Art on Tumblr and even deleted my posts of my AI Art as well. I was told twice that obviously, nobody liked my posts of my AI Art because it's not creative which felt very heartbreaking and discouraging, very discouraging. So then, I decided to take a break from posting stuff on Tumblr for a while in hopes of healing my wounds fully and maybe things would get better. When I returned to Tumblr after a whole week of healing, I thought things would be better but I didn't know what to post that everybody would like to see since nobody loved my AI Art. But I didn't expect the same incident to happen again when somebody suggested that I shouldn't post AI art, which once again hurt me deeply and caused my wounds to start reopening. I fully understand and get the fact that no one likes my AI Art posts, but there’s no good in rubbing salt in my wounds because it will make them raw even more, and I’ve found it hard to post my art anymore. I wish I hadn't been judged and rebuked harshly for my AI-generated art in the first place, just to be accepted as a Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends fan and to be accepted by everyone else in general. I shouldn’t have to change my style to fit in. I don’t know why, but I wish it didn't have to be like that. Because of those negative experiences, I won't post any of my AI-generated art on Tumblr for good. I would appreciate it if everyone didn't mention that my AI-generated art isn’t enjoyable because it hurts my feelings. I feel like I'm a nobody to everyone else or maybe even a joke to other Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends fans. But it seems my feelings don't matter to everyone else not even Foster's Home Imaginary Friends fans.

Well, I hope that everyone on Tumblr will understand especially other Foster's Imaginary Friends fans that I don't appreciate being rejected and being greatly treated like a nobody all because I posted my AI Art. After all, it's not okay at all. Unfortunately, I still can't stop thinking about what happened last Tuesday and on October 14th, and because of those two incidents, I feel like I have a big, massive scar on my heart that would be impossible to heal even with stitches and bandages.💔

@gr3gori4h,

I really don't appreciate the fact you brought up how nobody doesn't like my AI Art and my feelings were deeply hurt and felt like a nobody once again because of you. Furthermore, I understand nobody likes the old content of my AI Art but you shouldn't have to rub it in even more. Overall, I'm expressing how I felt on that day. I really hope you understand that your suggestion of not posting AI Art has stung me like a wasp's sting because it's already bad enough that I was told that nobody likes my AI Art, had to change my tastes in my art to fit in with the other Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends fans or whatever and that I don't want to post any of my AI Art on Tumblr anymore.

So with that being said,

Here's the following I will post:

Cooking Videos

Pictures of Food

Assorted Backgrounds

Aesthetic Moodboards

Aesthetics (in general)

Everything I ate Videos

Dessert Decorating Videos

Just Dance Videos

Pictures of Gemstones

Pictures of Animals

Pictures of Kirby

I don't know if it'll resonate with everyone's interests but at least it's something, I hope my brand-new content will spark your interests and satisfy you @blo0st4r, and everyone else on Tumblr.

Hopefully, I actually can be accepted and respected for who I am and my content as a true Foster's Home For Imaginary Fans and a Fellow Tumblr Blogger without being judged or rebuked harshly.

Overall, I was just expressing my feelings about what happened the past couple of weeks to everyone, to my followers, and especially other Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends Fans also I do hope you all understand.

Thank you for your patience and support during my hiatus to all of my followers especially, you @beelzemon03 😊

Let’s light this fire again!

Sincerely yours,

@pinkphotographyphoenix

Reblog and Like

[zukosdualdao]

Im glad to read the takes of a fellow zuko stan :)

Honestly, it feels like people just hate on him way too much lately. The posts ive seen on twitter, on tik tok, on tumblr... Do people just not like him anymore? Why did everyone turn against him so suddenly? I've been hoping it's something temporary, just a trend, but. I don't know anymore. People mock his disability, spit on his trauma, wish death on him and interpret everything he says or does in the worst possible way. I saw someone crying about how entitled he was because he took aang's seat when watching the play just the other day lmao. Another person wrote about how mysoginistic he was because he didn't remember katara's name when asking about kya's death to sokka? There are those who even call him a colonizer on the same level as iroh lmao. It seems their justifications for all the salt they throw his way are along the lines of "he's been loved for too long, aang stans have suffered way more, people just watched the show again and realized how bad he actually was, he's catching strays since his fans keep setting him up, his fans paint him as perfect and erase every bad thing he's done" etc etc. I'm all for criticism and deeper character analysis, but this is just said in bad faith. I also think it has a bit to do with how different engagement has become in fandom spaces recently (things people support in fiction need to be morally correct) and well, zuko was the perfect target. He's done bad things, sides with the villains for a good portion of the series, redeems himself but there are things he still has to work on... I don't know, it's been getting to me. There are many other harsh things ive read said about him (like implying how every single member of the gaang hates even after redeeming himself), but i honestly don't have the energy to delve into each and every one. His arc was poorly executed and his development was badly written now, apparently. I kind of just ranted here, i apologize. Im very happy to read the posts of someone who genuinely likes him and doesnt throw him under the bus to defend or elevate other characters...

hi! i'm glad you're enjoying my blog <3 and no need to apologize for the rant, i'm always happy to talk about zuko!

about to theorize a bit as to why it seems like maybe zuko has become a more contentious character, but it should be noted i have not been exceptionally, actively involved in the fandom very long. i loved atla as a kid, have retained fond memories, have witnessed some discourse from the fringes over the years, but only recently has it overtaken my brain to the point of making a whole blog about it. lol. so, like, grain of salt, etc.

i think a big part of it is what you said - in the last few years of fandom in particular, it feels like there has been a huge upswing in purity culture, moralizing liking/not liking certain ships or characters, and an overall increase in very black-and-white thinking. there's also an emphasis on "holding people accountable" (good in theory), often without specifying what, exactly, that looks like (less good). the idea then becomes that if you've done harmful things, there's no way you can ever make up for them and should just, like, hate yourself for all eternity and also die, probably, which is not actually helpful to anyone.

so, i think for those who ascribe to that mindset, zuko is a prime candidate for them to criticize. and while there's nothing wrong with criticizing a character or their arc or writing if you truly have a problem with it, as you've said, a lot of the time, criticisms against zuko don't seem to be made in very good faith. after all, a big part of zuko's arc is having to unlearn some very black-and-white thinking. also, zuko is not a real person. he is a character, and therefore a narrative tool, and if we want him to be 'held accountable', we need look no further than the story itself, in which he is probably the character the narrative holds the most accountable for his actions due to his prior status as a villain.

(it reminds me a bit, actually, of another favorite character of mine: alec in the tv series shadowhunters. he starts out the story already in a heroic role, unlike zuko, but a big part of his narrative is unlearning some prejudiced cultural mindsets and challenging not only his previous ideologies, but his conception of himself and the people in his life as well. as a result, alec can look sometimes more obviously flawed than the other main cast, but the point is that the narrative asks him to examine those flaws and change and introspect and grow in a way that it doesn't always ask of other characters when they are showcasing their own flaws. which does make me thing about zuko vs. aang in the atla narrative.)

the other thing i think is contributing to zuko's more contentious status in the fandom is how long atla's been in the cultural consciousness, and how common it is for things that used to be popular to cycle through to people starting to criticize or actively hate it to people saying "no, actually, it's still pretty good, you just don't want to like a popular thing" (this is me rn), to maybe eventually getting popular again/at least in certain subsects of the audience. zuko was probably one of the most talked-about aspects of atla for a long time, and while i can understand how that could get frustrating (because there are some other really great characters and aspects of the story!), that's not, like, for no reason. people connected with and admired his story for a reason, and many still do, and (in my humble opinion) that is because it is one of the most thought-out, intentional, and nuanced character arcs of the show.

the ableism, i think, really gets to me because like... even if every criticism from the people who hate him were 100% accurate and said in good faith (they're not, but let's pretend for a minute)... that still wouldn't be an excuse for ableism against a character with a prominent facial difference (or making fun of abuse survivors for the permanent injuries they sustain from abuse.) if zuko had never redeemed himself and stayed a villain, it would still be wrong to talk about his scar and abuse the way some of his detractors do. and the show agrees with me! you know how i know? the only two characters to ever make fun of zuko's scar are villains in the narrative: zhao and azula. ("make fun of" might not be quite right for zhao, since what he said - "you have the scar to prove it" - is far more matter-of-fact than azula imitating him by covering her eye or "make sure they get your good side", but he's absolutely being a huge jerk about it.) other characters react to zuko's scar in all sorts of different ways, even when he's still in a villain/antagonist/anti-hero role: zuko's crew is horrified to learn how he got the scar, song sees a point of connection and tries to reach out to him, but, while i think well-intentioned, she breaks a major boundary by trying to touch his scar when he hasn't conveyed he's okay with that, jet makes assumptions about his background because of it, lee, the kid from zuko alone, asks with curious, childish naivete how he got it, only for his father to reprimand him for asking, aang reacts with annoyance/boredom to azula's ableist joke, and katara trips over her words to correct him when zuko thinks she's essentially calling him "scary to look at". not all of these interactions are positive, but the characters (all of whom are written as pretty sympathetic, even if also flawed) aren't outright trying to make fun of him for it, and the narrative never implies he deserves to be treated as less than because of it, even before his redemption.

anyway. if people don't believe in characters' (and, hell, irl people's) capacity for growth and change and don't want to have nuanced discussions about how trauma can impact these things, i mean... that's their prerogative, but i don't understand why they enjoy the show, because those are big parts of it (and not just wrt zuko.)

i know it can be frustrating, anon— trust me, i get very frustrated. but i promise you, there are plenty of people out there who a) still love zuko and his story and b) are capable of and willing to talk about things with nuance and in good faith. i'm happy to be part of that corner of fandom, and i bet you can manage to carve out a space where more people like that exist, too! <3

[sevensoulmates]

Thank you so much for the explanation, because yes I wasn't seeing the bigger picture (about the titles for the episodes) but yes, it's logical that the meaning behind the title will be to set an overall atmosphere for the whole thing. And I didn't knew about that many references to movies/series? mainly becausey I haven't seen most of them 🤦‍♀️ and other references about phrases (I just didn't know the "why" behind the titles).

And of course sometimes the characters don't even know what's going on their minds yet but luckily I'm on the "Eddie/Buck taking their sweet time realizing how they actually feel" side, getting there is half the fun right?

Thanks for the sharing the post by useramor, I didn't knew about it!

Can I ask another thing? I was really curious about some fans panicking over the possibility of Eddie calling Buck "brother" in incoming episodes, where is this coming from and why is this bad? I just don't get it and I feel like I missing some info.

Thank you for your prompt response, I really appreciate you taking the time to do it.

Titles do have some importance but most of the time the original source material doesn't have THAT much to do with it. Such as the movies, etc. Titles can help set the tone, and general themes, but I wouldn't take them wholly literally, as I've seen people be disappointed in the past because a title like "What's Your Fantasy?" didn't immediately equate to Buck and Eddie doing the nasty in that episode.

It's funny you should mention the "brother" thing, cuz that's actually what I was thinking about when I answered your last ask, hence the "CHARACTERS LIE!!" moment LOLOL I was actually debating making a whole post in regards to that but I was on the fence. Your ask gives me the perfect excuse.

For context: the "eddie calls buck his brother" rumors came about from some accounts on twitter and tumblr who claim (without proof) that they have a "source" that works for 911 that is feeding them info and pictures. Even if the source part is true, all of it is still out of context, and therefore anything that is leaked should ALWAYS be taken with the SMALLEST possible grain of salt. Nothing is true until we see it with our own eyeballs on our tv screens.

I feel like I'm one of the few people who didn't immediately be like one of them calling the other brother means it's the end of Buddie!! We already know that this arc is going to revolve around Buck (and possibly Eddie too) being confused and uncertain of where their relationship stands. I think that the purposeful confusion and uncertainty are because neither Buck nor Eddie really understands why their feelings are getting hurt or why the other is acting in certain ways. That, plus all of the last few seasons, have shown that Buck and Eddie don't really talk a lot about who they are to each other. They kind of just....live in that nebulousness and hope no one comes along and points out how odd it is.

Something else I want to point out is that if the rumor is true, we don't know AT WHAT POINT in the episode he says this. What new information might have come to light before this? Additionally, we don't know what acting choices might come along with it. Does Eddie look weird as he says "brother"? Does Buck make an odd face? Is the camera focus on the scene being uncomfortable? Is the "brother" comment accepted easily or hesitantly? Is there romantic/soft or discordant music in the background? What is being said without being said in the moment? There are simply too many unknown variables in the equation including story context, editing, sound, and acting choices for me to immediately be like "damn, guess I'll give up now".

We also don't know if this happens in episode 4 or 5 which also vastly changes the context.

I'll also tell you what my first thought was when I heard the "Eddie calls buck his brother!" rumors. I thought "Oh of course he did, he's still deep in compulsory heterosexuality".

Let's think about this in two ways:

If Buck comes out as Bi, and Eddie calls him his brother for the first time since they met? That's so strange. Why now all of a sudden is Eddie purposefully trying to immediately shut down the possibility of them being romantic? Why does the idea of Buck having a romantic interest in men suddenly make Eddie feel the need to draw boundaries? One could say it's a homophobic response, or (more likely) an internalized homophobic response. One could also say it's so Buck does not get the idea of a romantic relationship being possible between them, which again, why does he feel the need to draw that distinction if they're both oh so confident they're the best of friends and will never be anything but friends. "Brother" is also distancing language as well. It could be a way for Eddie to distance himself from Buck, and in turn, Buck's queerness. Again, why? No one in his immediate circle is homophobic so why does he feel the need to distance himself in every way possible from even the tiniest idea of queerness being associated with him? All of it screams internalized homophobia and compulsory heterosexuality to me.

Now let's go the non-queer route. Say Buck is still straight as a ruler. They resolve their issue, Eddie reassures Buck that they're best still friends, etc. I am again wondering why Eddie feels the need to use "brother" for the first time in years. It should imply being closer than friends. But Eddie has already proven that he views Buck as closer than his blood family, hence why Buck is in the will, and Eddie's family is not. So why again, "brother" if not to purposely draw attention to the odd (and out of character) word choice. This could once again be Eddie using distancing language, which once again implies all of the stuff I said before. And in this case, it's even odder, because Buck is (as far as Eddie knows) a straight man. So why the need to draw a boundary? That lends more to Eddie having a potential fear of being perceived as queer by Buck. That also lends to internalized homophobia.

And all of that aside, at the end of the day, Buck and Eddie are not blood-related, and they didn't grow up with each other, so even if they call each other brothers...it's always going to be in a metaphorical sense. And there's the fact that FEELINGS. CAN. CHANGE. Eddie might believe he sees Buck as a brother at the moment, but that could change in a single instant. If Eddie's really not had that many other close male friends in his life, he might truly believe that what he feels for Buck is just friendship and not realize that actually...this is something vastly different. Or, like I said, he might be LYING. The writers could also be LYING to us on purpose.

It's possible that it could be used as a red herring, to make the audience believe one thing, and then they plan to subvert it as a "plot twist" at the end. It could be used as a plot device and a stepping stool to so many other things. And additionally, why now? Why in this big episode where it seems like sexuality might come into play? Why not in episode 1 when Eddie could've been like "You're like an uncle to Chris". And of course, again, the biggest point of them all: we already KNOW that Buck and Eddie are the closest of friends. We've seen it, new audiences have seen it. So why suddenly redefine it as "brothers" during an episode where it seems like Buck is getting his own feelings regarding their relationship confused.

The last thing to think about is this: how does doubling down on Buck and Eddie being "brothers" push the story forward? Story needs conflict, and 911 thrives off of creating long-term conflict. How does being "brothers" set up a long-term conflict for them? Or, if being "brothers" is the resolution for their conflict, then what is changing as a result of being "brothers"? How are they getting closer than they already are by being "brothers"? Truthfully, them redefining their relationship to "brothers" changes absolutely nothing about their relationship.

I don't agree with people who say "This shuts down all hope of buddie" because season 6 already pulled them as far apart as they could be. It gave them female love interests to do something with if they wanted to this season but fact of the matter is that the writers didn't want to pursue those stories. They threw Buddie back together so fiercely and chopped their love interests down to less importance than randos on calls.

So what is left that actually can cause Buck and Eddie's relationship to evolve into something we've never seen from them before? The only answer is romance. So, no, I'm not worried about some random "brothers" comment.

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

5, 17, 25, 29

For the ask game, please!

woooo! more asks! Thank you thank you! :D <3

5. What’s a fic idea you’ve had that you will never write?

Oooh probably a few of the ones listed in the previous ask about fic ideas that I have noodling around in my head.

Off the top, I'll probably not write "Grima Becomes King" even though it would be fun. Mostly because I know it would be the world's longest fic and the idea of writing it makes me feel tired.

17. What’s something you’ve learned about while doing research for a fic?

Oh man, many things. What comes to mind is how much I've learned about late antiquity/early medieval Scandinavia for all things Rohan & Grima related.

I think an interesting tid-bit was the gender disparity of infanticide. Not shocking, given how patriarchal Scandinavian society was at the time, but far, far more girls were killed than boys. Also skeletal remains show that in times of famine, boys were given more (and better) food than the girls.

(don't tell tumblr, they're very keen on thinking Viking (tm) society was a world of gender equality and other nonsense)

25. Have you ever upset yourself with your own writing?

I have! In different ways. For Grima stuff - the scenes where he's forced to eat his horse in My Land is Bare were just - I icked myself writing them. Degradation in general icks me and I always get in a weird headspace after writing it.

I have absolutely made myself cry writing bits of Thus Always. Particularly the death of Downey's father (that chapter has a banger of an ending line: So, in silence they look at one another, truly look at one another, for the first time in thirty years, and in silence Amos dies.) The eulogy appendix also gets me. Annnd this bit with Downey's mother:

Annette catches Downey at the door, squeezes his arm, says, ‘I never understood why you did what you did.’ ‘Why I left? Surely he told you the gory details.’ ‘No, no, I never understood why you chose to…to be like that. Did I do something wrong?’ Downey takes in her weeping eyes, her pain, her sorrow, the mad grief over things she has no words for, and he just shakes his head. Just shakes it and shakes it and shakes it.

the infamous "did I do something wrong and that is why you're a queer" conversation that many people have unfortunately had

29. Share a bit from a fic you’ll never post OR from a scene that was cut from an already posted fic. (If you don’t have either, just share a random fic idea you have that you don’t plan on getting to.)

Something from a follow-up fic to Swimming Through Fire world. Two years after the war, a year after Grima and Éomer came to some vague Arrangement, and Éomer's off to go get married. Lucky him.

They're on their way to Umbar as I have Eomer marrying outside Gondor for reasons of regional political cohesion. Safan, everyone's favourite main man from the ROTK installment of the Swimming Through Fire series, makes an appearance.

---

Of course, Safan could have other sources, Gríma reasons. About Éomer. About what he is like as a man. Safan is talented, clearly capable, and trusted—therefore, he is likely to have heard his fill about the future king of Éomarc.

Who is currently standing towards the front of the boat watching the horizon dip up, down, and again again again.

No storm, but the sea roils. Gríma was told it’s the wind, a beautiful day for the voyage, but choppy. Hold fast. Do you know how to swim?

He told the sailor: I can hold my breath for two minutes.

The sailor laughed: that’s a start, I suppose.

No, no, I can swim. I’d just rather not.

Then hold fast.

So, he’s holding fast. He’s watching the water. The surf kicked up, foam white as the froth of churning milk. He thinks he wants to be sick.

What did he have to break his fast? Sweet buns, fruit, cheese. They dine light in the morning in Khephanto, same as they do in Éomarc. A welcomed change from other parts of Gondor where it is blood sausages and eggs and liver and salted fish and fried mushrooms piled high with toast and hot milk and gods the memory makes him more nauseous than he thought possible.

He tries to lean over the railing, thinking it would make sense to be sick into the ocean, but the thought of being so suspended over water—only his head, his shoulders and chest, but still—it sends him skittering away.

Foolish, of course, he survived the river Isen when he fell in. He survived Limlight more than once as a boy. He’d be fine until they fish him out.

Provided they fished him out.

Gríma finds Éomer again—still at the helm. Golden haired in the golden sun looking at ease despite the tumult.

They’d fish him out, Gríma thinks bleakly. Surely. Éomer would make them. Surely.

He wouldn’t be left to drown. Horrorhorrorhorror—how the chest burns and everything’s upside down and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and————

A bucket.

Gríma looks up, realizes his hands are on his knees and he’s shaking. Safan stands before him, holding the bucket.

‘Didn’t realize you’d be so sour stomached,’ Safan says.

Gríma wrenches the bucket from his hand, turns around, and is promptly sick into it. Somewhere, someone laughs. He’s certain it’s at him. He would care if he didn’t feel like his stomach wanted to crawl up his throat.

‘Just lean over the side,’ Safan suggests, all fatherly.

‘Can’t.’

‘Alright.’

‘This is horrible.’

‘You’ll get used to it.’

‘Inhuman.’

Safan laughs.

‘Truly,’ Gríma insists. He hugs the bucket of his bile. ‘Horrible. I’m going home by land. I don’t care if it takes me three months.’

Safan pats him on the shoulder, tells him that he’ll get used to it. It’s only another two and a half days—two if the wind holds. Gríma pulls an ugly face: two days! He doesn’t have enough in him to throw up for two days of travel. Safan shakes his head, pats his shoulder again, insists that Gríma will be fine.

‘Horizon,’ Safan points, ‘keep your eye on that and your stomach should settle.’

‘It’ll settle when I’m dead.’

‘I love your optimism, I’m sure your future king does too.’

Gríma makes no response, save to turn away from Safan and sick into the bucket a second time.

/

Early afternoon, still the first day, they’ve yet to have the blessing of crossing the small hours into daybreak, they’re not even at dusk, yet, and Éomer finds Gríma who has found a rope pile to sit on, with his bucket, trying to stare at the horizon.

‘I don’t know how you’re not ill, my lord,’ Gríma whines.

Éomer makes no reply. His eyes are also trained on where sky meets sea—a beautiful greying line if Gríma was in the mind to admire.

‘Perhaps you are sick as well,’ Gríma suggests.

Éomer shakes his head.

‘Assuredly,’ Gríma insists.

Éomer smiles, taught it stops half-up his face.

‘Knew it,’ Gríma mutters.

Éomer strides to the railing, leans over, and vomits. Gríma laughs. His future king makes no response. Gríma needles: ‘Would you like a bucket? The bucket is wisdom itself.’

‘I’m fine,’ Éomer replies, as if nothing occurred. ‘I don’t see why you’re making such a fuss.’ Slipping into the northern dialect of the Wold Éomer continues, ‘You’re not being very sympathetic for someone also suffering.’

‘My lord, you should know better than to come and roost upon my stoop in search of sympathy. It died in the womb. I might have eaten it.’

‘Along with your heart?’

‘To be sure. That shriveled, little thing.’

But his future lord-king is smiling, if not outright laughing, and Gríma doesn’t know how to stand in this moment. It’s been two years since the war—almost exactly. They’re just entering April, a fine month to travel in. It’s been fifteen months and a week since that first post-war winter yule when things between them became…sticky. Gríma isn’t sure how to term it, he isn’t sure there is a word for it. He is sure Éomer wouldn’t know and so has never made an effort to ask.

And what is there to ask about? Aside from Gríma’s commitment to burning down the entirety of the world should Éomer ask it of him. A bit of a rub, a bit rum, that the lord should instead ask him to create rather than destroy. Which is just like Éomer, to be contrary to Gríma’s desires whilst being, at the same time, precisely what is desired.

He thinks he might be sick into the bucket again.

‘Éothain told me about the creatures you’re concerned we’ll become victim to,’ Éomer says.

‘His investigations did little to assuage me. That said, their appearance could put me out of my misery, which is a boon.’

‘I think you’re over-reacting.’

Gríma turns away from Éomer, thinks he’s going to be sick, but it passes. He turns back around. On Éomer’s face is writ feint amusement. Gríma he thinks he should be sick on Éomer’s boots to make a point.

Some shuffling of feet as Éomer leans against the side of the boat to again stare at distant horizon as instructed by Safan. Gríma supposes he could try it, but doesn’t think standing wise at this precise moment.

‘Have you heard anything further?’ Éomer asks with a fantastical attempt at disinterest.

Gríma feigns confusion: ‘Further, my lord?’

‘About this—about Lady Dihya,’ he slides through her name in a chaotic fashion, it’s half Éothéod and half an approach to Umbar pronunciations. Good gods, Gríma cannot wait for them to meet if only to hear them butcher each other’s names in such a full-frontal fashion. ‘You were seen speaking with Safan.’

‘Safan and I are acquaintances of old.’

‘Shouting at each other over a wall proceeding a siege hardly makes one an acquaintance of old.’

‘Hardly a siege,’ Gríma scoffs. ‘Lord Aragorn lightly threatened them with ghosts and they saw reason and left.’

‘And the draugr.’

Gríma tilts his head skyward. Éomer follows suit asking if that brother of Gríma’s is around. Which brother would Éomer son of Éomund be asking after? Gods Gríma, the only brother who could possibly be present—the bog-drowned inhuman one that’s a crow half the time. It tried to peck the eyes out of a Meduseld mouser the other day. Hasn’t Gríma taught it manners, yet?

‘Baldir was never keen on following orders,’ Gríma replies tartly. ‘It is hardly my fault he is enacting the behaviours of his kind, now that he is what he is. He’s not eating people or horses. Nor goats, cows, hounds, most cats, and other such important creatures. I cannot vouch for poultry or hares. And no, he’s not around. I told him to fuck off back home before we left.’

Éomer mouths: fuck off back home with some mild astonishment. Gríma gives a desultory look: what?

Éomer tries another question, ‘Did Safan tell you anything useful? Are there things I should avoid saying or doing?’

‘I am not here,’ Gríma holds up a hand, turns away and vomits into the bucket. It’s all bile, at this point. He tried drinking water with ginger in it, recommended by Éothain, but it came to naught. He wipes his mouth, pushes hair out of his face, turns back around to Éomer. ‘I am not here in an advisory capacity. As I told Safan, I don’t know why I’m here. I hardly expected it.’

‘My uncle,’ Éomer glances at the men around them—all Haradrim or Gondorian, the Éothéod are generally seasick and showing it. He continues in the Wold dialect: ‘My uncle took you aside before we left. Éothain and Gundahar both saw it occur. You spoke for a good space of time, what did he say?’

‘Oh, that. He was telling me to mind myself and not get into trouble. That the first whiff of anything suspicious he’ll know whose door to knock at. As if I haven’t learned my lesson! truly I wish people understood that. I make mistakes, the lords know, but I tend not to make the same ones twice.’

Éomer, to his credit, does not believe Gríma—at least about the not knowing what his role is. Gríma hopes he believes him about lessons learned. He had assumed Éomer did—few others, but at least Éomer. Hama would believe him, if he were alive. This thought does a strangeness to Gríma’s chest, an emotion he is learning to name regret. He rarely feels it, if ever, but with Hama yes, it rears its ugly head.  

Gríma sometimes wonders what the percentage is that Éomer believes. Is it fifty per cent of what Gríma says? Eighty? Twenty? Or entirely situational? Probably entirely situational. Probably Gríma doesn’t want to know.

‘Surely you’ve been briefed,’ Gríma says into a long stretched silence.

‘Of course I have.’

‘Then you have nothing to worry about.’

Éomer gives him such a statement with his expression and Gríma would laugh if it were appropriate. Instead of saying: horseshit and you know it, Éomer replies: ‘For the sake of relations between countries I want to make a good impression. My uncle said he trusted me to represent Éomarc.’

‘I should hope so, as future king yourself you’re the embodiment of our people and our land.’

Grating, grating, grating—Éomer paces this through. Gríma wants to say what he always thinks in these situations, that Éomer is the better option to Théodred. One represents Éomarc more wholly and entirely than the other. Théodred was nice. Théodred would have tried. He would have done what he thought was the best. Gríma knows better than to sneer those sentiments aloud to the cousin and inheritor who sometimes goes morose and burrows into himself when the former heir is mentioned. The man who Éomer idolized, to some degree, and who did not live long enough to shatter those illusions.

Well, well, that is Éomer, sitting in the sun comparing himself to dead heroes who cannot be faulted in anything because they are dead.

Another wave of nausea comes, Gríma waits to need the bucket, but it passes. How is it so warm? It’s April, it should be the perfect temperature at all times.

-

‘A rat with a bucket,’ cheerfully calls a voice.

Gríma puts on a flattering smile, ‘my lady, it gladdens my heart to know you are not similarly afflicted.’

‘Not a whit.’

‘Truly,’ Éomer asks. ‘I can’t believe that.’

‘Sorry, brother, but alas that is the case.’ Éowyn does not sound entirely sympathetic. She then glances between them and to her brother asks: ‘What conference have you with Wyrmtunga?’

‘Trying to get information out of him about what we can expect. He chatted with Lord Safan last night.’

‘My how we’ve resurrected ourselves,’ Éowyn sneers at Gríma who continues, with great effort, to appear cheerfully nonplussed but gods gods gods he wants to be sick again. He knows he must be green about the gills for how she laughs. ‘Uncle said you were to behave.’

‘I am, on my honour.’ Gríma adds, ‘on the life of Stigr.’

‘Not nothing,’ Éowyn owns. ‘How do you know lord Safan? He seems above your station and rank, now that you are nothing in particular.’

‘The war.’

‘They shouted pleasantries at each other over the walls of Pelargir,’ Éomer explains, ‘before Aragorn reminded everyone time was of the essence.’

‘Lord Aragorn was just as party to the pleasantries, my lord.’

Éowyn’s keen eyes, sharp as knives, slice from brother to Gríma and Gríma knows a dissection is occurring, there will be a result from it, but it will not be accurate. He knows where her assumptions will lead her, and he is right when she asks: ‘Did you know him through Saruman?’

‘No, my lady, I never met him save that day during the war. I had assumed he died, until he showed up as ambassador.’ He adds, half-afterthought and undertone, ‘not everything is a conspiracy.’

‘I hear she likes hunting,’ Éowyn tells her brother, ignoring Gríma’s reply. ‘Stalking and the like. Talk to her about that and you’ll be safe.’

‘What else did you hear?’

‘Books—histories about seafaring voyages and distant battles, also political machinations. But she is not adverse to the occasional bout of poetry. Recite her something pretty about nature, I heard. She’s partial to birds and fish, also long descriptions of sand dunes which are, apparently, beautiful.’

‘I see.’

‘I’m doubtful too,’ Éowyn agrees. ‘But having never seen one, we could be wrong. Her favourite colour is red and her favourite metal is copper.’

‘See,’ Éomer snaps at Gríma, ‘this is useful information I can do something with.’

Gríma levers himself upright, a dangerous decision for it sets his stomach on edge again, bidding a well-rehearsed and beautiful good-day to them he stalks across the ship towards the prow. He read a book about ships while in Minas Tirith and tried to memorize all their bits and pieces. This is a long, round nosed, shallow bottomed galley. Predominantly used for trade and moving passengers and animals. Gríma marks the three masts, the place for the oarsmen, though as they’re “with the wind” it's just sail work.

In the stern is the—he blanks on the term—but it’s a built-up structure where captain and important guests stay in relative comfort. Everyone else gets shoved below deck with the lice and livestock.

Castle! That’s what the structure is called. A castle.

Daft name.

Or maybe not, he doesn’t know anything about ocean-going vessels. They must be defended, especially merchant fleets, so perhaps castle is apt. Defending the keep, except it’s your boat.

Nearing the prow Gríma grips the railing and stares forward. Fresh sea air helps keep stomach in check. By the time the breeze gets to the back where he had hidden himself there was nothing much left to it. Knuckles whiten as his hands twist on the wood. Well waxed, there are no splinters, but he can feel its course nature against skin. A grounding experience. He sucks in a breath, holds, exhales.

Marvelous, he tells himself, it’s all marvelous. His still being alive and in one piece, mostly. Also this. Boats, oceans, skies, new lands, languages, the many and varied people present in the world. Oh, no, not distracting enough, he leans forward, is sick into the water as he gets hit with ocean spray.

Well, he thinks as he wipes salt water off, at least he knows his face is clean.

[mylight-png]

i know you said goyim don’t respond but I’d really like to know about yom kippur and your fast

This is very nice and respectful, thank you!! For future reference (for anyone reading this), questions are okay!! When I say "don't respond" I usually mean that I'd prefer for goyim not to respond to the question I ask of other Tumblr Jews in the post, not response to the post in general.

Okay so, Yom Kippur is our day of atonement, where we take the day to pray and ask for forgiveness for anything we've done the previous year.

On this day there are a few rules. Firstly, we cannot eat or drink. Second, we cannot wash or use any lotions/creams/etc. Finally, we can't wear leather shoes.

The way I was taught explained that we are supposed to be "like angels" on this day (which also means that one of our prayers, usually whispered, is said out loud on Yom Kippur) and therefore when we abstain from these "human pleasures" we are fulfilling this concept. And then the more seemingly evident reason is that it's a way of showing our regrets for our transgressions.

There's also the basic holiday prohibitions such as driving and using electricity (among others).

Although fasting is considered the "big thing" of Yom Kippur, there are circumstances under which it is considered a mitzvah (there's a few ways to explain a mitzvah, think of it as a rule in this case) to eat/drink if one's health would be harmed by fasting. For example, I have issues with my kidneys, so I drink on Yom Kippur (I don't eat though).

I'm not a rabbi, nor would I be considered particularly observant, so take this with a grain of salt and keep in mind that I have definitely left out some details! However, I'd say this is a fairly decent surface-level explanation of Yom Kippur.

Thank you for your respectful question, I'm glad that you want to learn!

[flapjacs]

New Firefox update (version 128) enables adtracking

https://www.reddit.com/r/pcmasterrace/comments/1e45mih/firefox_enables_adtracking_for_all_users/

The wording is a little strange, but the general consensus is to opt out. One of their devs had the absolute nerve to say

"Opt-in is only meaningful if users can make an informed decision. I think explaining a system like PPA would be a difficult task. And most users complain a lot about these types of interruption. In my opinion an easily discoverable opt-out option + blog posts and such were the right decision." [x]

"You're too stupid to make this decision, so we'll make it for you." Wow, thanks! They neither explain it clearly (and admit that) nor told anyone (they said it was announced in emails, but then acknowledge that their average user doesn't look at stuff like that) ofc we cant make an informed decision. I'm still trying to figure out if this means they put a filter between the tracker and us that's already grabbing this info -or- if they're doing the trackers work for them by sending the info before the tracker even asks for it.

Based on how overly worded everything is and they can't be bothered to make it simple to understand, and that a lot of people don't keep up on these things, the assumption would be that more people will leave this unchecked than not, so they might not get all of us but better more than not, therefore, you want to uncheck it. As always, take my analysis with a grain of salt, and look into it yourself. But the way it's worded just seems like they've fucked us either way. Their CTO said none of this matters if you have adblock, which is bullshit for a number of reasons, but that isn't foolproof. Companies/websites are doing their damnedest to circumvent adblockers all the time. cough tumblr cough

TO OPT OUT:

go to settings>privacy & security -or- type "about:preferences#privacy" in your search bar

scroll down to "website advertising preferences"

uncheck box marked "allow websites to perform privacy-preserving ad measurement

If you do not see it, you might have an older version of firefox. It doesn't seem to be on mobile yet.

WELL SHIT. WHILE YOU'RE AT IT: There's a "Firefox Data Collection and Use" section, make sure to uncheck all that too. Amazing.