#so the two of them decide to fake court each other

[obsessedwithceleste]

You Can Say You Love Me Now

Theodore Nott x reader

Summary: A little fake dating trope, just in time for Valentine's day

word count: 3k

©️ obsessedwithceleste. all works posted here belong to me and should not be reposted or copied in any way or form.

It was the perfect plan really. Or it had seemed like it at the time. When fueled by frustration, love, and desperation, what could go wrong? Theo had loved you for as long as he could remember and he wasn’t afraid to admit that. To himself at least. But to you, well, that was a bit more challenging.

Coming from a pure blood family, a sacred 28 family no less, Theodore’s fate had been sealed long before he was even born. Destined to marry another rich, pure blood heiress, have children, and secure the Nott legacy another generation. All ridiculous nonsense if you asked Theodore. What was the point of tradition anyway? Pretty much everyone who cared was already dead, so what did it matter?

Unfortunately for Theo, his father was not dead and had been trying to find a suitable match for what felt like years at this point. Names of witches that Theo couldn’t even match a face to had been floated by, but Theo had spoiled each and every potential match and his father had been growing increasingly more agitated by the day.

That’s when it had struck him. Kill two birds with one stone. Get his father off his back and gain the perfect opportunity to win over the witch of his dreams. Was it a bit short sighted? Sure. But he wasn’t left with many options at this point and this was as good a plan as any.

“Please principessa, you know what my father’s like. And it would only be a few months.” Theo begged, following close behind you as you make your way through the labyrinth that is the Hogwarts library.

“I am not going to pretend to date you for a few months Theodore. Or at all. That’s actually insane. Besides, no one would believe it anyway. We’ve known each other for how long? No one is going to buy the idea of us just now deciding to go out. Especially not your father. Do you know how long my mother has been trying to set us up?” you sigh, plucking another book off the shelf.

You had known Theodore practically your whole life. The two of you had been best friends since before you could walk. Your earliest memories involved waddling around the gardens of his family’s manor as your mothers watched on in thrilled bliss. There was simply no way the two of you would be fooling anyone.

“Well that’s just it isn’t it? Father has been hounding me to court you for ages, he’ll be too relieved to care,” Theo replies, an air of desperation creeping into his voice.

"Yeah, And what do you suppose we'd tell them hmm?" You ask.

"Don't know. We wanted it to happen naturally or some other sappy story. They'll eat it up."

You give your friend a pointed look. This was not the first time he had presented you with a half-baked plan that was certain to go wrong at some point.

“You’re being so ridiculous right now Theodore, this easily makes it on the list of your top ten stupidest ideas.”

“You keep a list?”

“It’s alphabetized.”

Theo has the nerve to look offended.

“Please principessa? I know your family has been on you too. This will buy us both a little time at least,” Theo protests. "Just think, we tell them over winter break, string it along awhile, and then after we've gone our seperate ways we're just too broken hearted to even consider any other possibilities for the future."

In all fairness, the boy was right. Your family had been bothering you for months now, asking if you’d found a special someone. You'd known when Theodore's father began ramping up the pressure for him to find a match that your family wouldn't be far behind, but it was honestly starting to get to be a bit ridiculous. And exhausting.

"It's not even completely incomprehensible. We've been mistaken as a couple before." Theo continues to press.

You glare at your friend, eyes rolling at the mere memory.

six months prior

It had been another one of your mother's usual, stuffy garden parties. The sun had been beating down on you all morning and all you really wanted to do was throw your blasted shoes across the lawn. Who thought it was a sensible idea to be out on the garden's cobblestone paths in scorching heat for hours at a time? This was not your idea of a good time.

"Principessa," Theodore greeted, arm wrapping comfortably around your waist.

"Don't even start, Theodore," you grumbled, leaning into the boy. "I'm tired, I'm hungry, and if my mother tries to make me join one more conversation about the Ministry or some such I'll set the whole garden on fire."

Theodore just laughed, pulled you closer.

"C'mon love. We can sneak off to the lake I reckon. Berkshire just arrived so the mums will all be too busy throwing him at the Greengrass sisters to notice."

Had you felt a bit bad leaving Enzo to the wolves? Sure. But still, you had let Theodore lead you down the path to the lake, collapsing onto the lawn sofa that was perched almost picturesquely on the patio overlooking the glassy water.

You had closed your eyes, feeling yourself relax into Theodore as his fingers combed methodically through your hair. You didn't know how long the both of you had been sitting there simply basking in each other's company when an excited gasp jolted you from your peaceful bliss.

"Oh! Oh my!" the shrill voice of one of your mother's airheaded socialites tittered. "I wasn't aware the both of you were courting! Oh your parents must be so pleased- what with your families being so close and all-"

"We're not courting." You interjected, holding your hand up to stop the women mid sentence.

She had stuttered awkwardly after that before finally shuffling off. Had you been a bit harsh? Perhaps. But you simply hadn't been in any sort of mood to deal with the notion of dating your best friend.

Theodore hadn't said a word, but you could feel him recoil ever so slightly. Not enough for anyone to notice if it hadn't been you. And things were a bit, strained, for the following days. If you could even call it that. And then things went back to normal as if nothing had happened.

You would have forgotten the whole thing, brushed it under the rug as something to laugh about in a few years, if it hadn't left a nagging feeling in the back of your mind.

You had never even allowed yourself to think that you could ever end up with your friend. Sure, years ago your mothers had shared the fantasy of the both of you ending up together one day. You were sure your mother was still convinced it might happen. But no. He would be auctioned off to the family of some wealthy heiress and you would be matched with some boy your parents deemed suitable. It was just how things worked.

Your feared your father was wearing going to wear through the carpet at any moment with the way he was pacing back and forth in front of the fireplace. Your mother sat twiddling her fingers on the sofa across from you, watching your father in exasperation.

Theodore was quite pleased with himself. To be completely honest he really didn't think he'd get this far. But sitting smugly on the sofa of his father's office, arm wrapped securely around you as he faced not only his own father, but your parents as well, he felt on top of the world.

"Well? Is it true? Are you?" your mother asks, finally breaking the silence as she had apparently given up on your father being the first to speak.

Your father had stormed off to Mr. Nott's office before you could even let out a breath, and by the time you and Theodore had finally slunk into the room, your mother was already doing a piss poor job of hiding her excitement.

It had always been a dream of hers for the both of you to end up together one day. It was hardly a kept secret. Maybe Theodore had been right and their blind excitement would stop them from asking too many questions because this was truly horrific.

"Of course it's true! It better be! The way I found him all over y/n," your father interrupts.

Mr. Nott just gazes on, eyes seemingly boring into your soul as Theodore meets his father's stare with cool, nonchalance. The smug bastard.

"Oh it's all we ever hoped for!" Your mother gushes, eyes falling onto the portrait hanging on the wall of the late Mrs. Nott.

"Well. That settles it then. They'll begin courting. Or whatever it is they call it these days," Mr. Nott says finally. "But there will be no more of this, nonsense. Not under my roof."

a few minutes earlier

"After further reassessment, this is the stupidest idea you've ever had," you hiss. Glaring at the brunette boy in front of you.

You were currently perched on one of the many desks lining the library walls of Nott Manor. Theodore was pressed up against the side, warm hands on your thighs holding you securely in place and sending shivers down your spine.

"Hush amore. How else will they be convinced we've been hiding a relationship, hmm?" He asks, slowly guiding one of your arms up to wrap around his neck.

"Oh I don't know. Suppose we just tell them? Ever think of that?"

"Yeah, and how would that go? Hey mum, I've been secretly seeing the son of your dead best friend who you've been trying to set me up with for ages. This is definitely not a distraction. Please believe us." Theo scoffs.

"I'm being serious," you respond, giving the boy a light whack on the shoulder. "When I agreed to the whole 'pretend to go out' bit, this is not what I had in mind."

"We've kissed before," Theo drawls, all nonchalance.

"You know that's not the same Theodore."

Before Theodore is able to respond, likely with another of his dry quips that you had grown to adore (not that you'd ever admit it), the door of the library swings open, footsteps echoing on the marble floors.

You don't even get the chance to fully take in the reality of the situation before Theodore's lips are on yours. It's slow and soft and warm as you feel his thumb softly brushing circles on your inner thigh. A soft gasp escapes you as you melt into the boy.

"What is the meaning of this?" Your father's cutting voice calls out, breaking you from your trance.

You jolt away from Theo, eyes snapping up to meet your father's, face flushed with embarrassment. Theo on the other hand looked quite self-satisfied. Oh you were going to kill him later.

"Both of you. Into the office. Now." Your father snaps out, looking like he was wishing he could obliviate himself in that moment.

"How long are we going to keep this going?" you ask, eyes not quite meeting Theo's as you lean your head against him. It was another warm night in which you and Theodore had managed to sneak up to the astronomy tower.

Your visits to the astronomy tower had started back in fourth year. It seemed like forever ago. And now you looked forward to nothing as much as nights spent with Theodore gazing up at the sky. The nights were different now though, you supposed.

It had been what? Five months now? You were almost certain it was five months, but those months seemed to have flown by in bliss. You hadn't realized how easy it would be. You and Theodore seemed to have been carefully tip toeing the line between friendship and more for years. You simply hadn't put the pieces together. It had been a bit clunky at first sure. Awkward maybe. But this was perfect. Standing in Theodore's arms as the stars above you seemed to go on forever. Perfect.

three-ish months prior

"Shut up. Shut. Up. You're joking," Daphne squeals, eyes locking onto your fingers which are tightly interlocked with Theo's as you enter your dorm room.

Something you seemed to have overlooked when agreeing to Theodore's dating scheme, was the fact that an integral part of the plan involved selling the lie to your closest friends.

It was much more difficult than you had anticipated.

You had spent the first initial month spending all your free time with Theodore, never really leaving his side. Apparently this didn't seem out of the ordinary. The flowers sent to your dorm didn't elicit a single reaction from your roommate, nor did Theodore's constant pet names. No, what really did it apparently, was the hand holding. Scandalous.

Your friends never failed to miss an opportunity to humble you.

"Took them long enough. Don't know why you're so shocked Daph," Mattheo replies dryly from his spot on the floor, papers scattered around him. He doesn’t even bother to look up.

"Well duh. We all knew they'd end up together eventually. Just didn't think they'd figure it out while we were still in school." Daph responds matter of factly. “Ugh. I owe Pansy 25 galleons now.” She groans, a frown appearing on her face.

"We can hear you, you know," Theo drawls, raising an eyebrow.

"Well it isn't as if the two of you have been subtle about it. Always holed up together in the library for hours at a time doing gods knows what."

"We study together," you reply, feeling the need to defend yourself.

"You’ve also attend every single ball together since, ever," Mattheo adds.

"Better that then go with whatever tossers our parents dig up."

"I've found the both of you asleep in Theodore's bed on more than one occasion."

"As friends."

"Right. You'd sleep together as friends, but drew the line at hand holding." Daphne says dryly. "You're both hopeless."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Y/n, I damn near saw you hex Theo's hand off in fifth year when he tried to hold your hand, and even that wasn't solid proof that you two weren't already going out." Daphne snorts. "Hopeless."

"C'mon Daph, let's leave the love birds to it then," Mattheo says, gathering his papers. "Make good choices. Don't do anything I'd do," he calls as the two of them make a quick exit.

As soon as the door slams shut, you turn to look at Theo as if to ask 'what on Earth was that about?'

“They make fair points,” he says with a shrug, pulling you onto the bed with him.

"We weren't being obvious about anything Theodore. There was nothing there to begin with." You reply, allowing him to pull you onto his chest.

You knew there hadn't been anything there before, or at least you thought there wasn't, because this was all very new. Sure before you might've fallen asleep in the same bed after staying up until 3 am studying for your charms exam, but you'd certainly never seen Theodore look at you like this before. And you'd certainly never felt his hand creep under your shirt to rub soft circles across your rib cage. You'd definitely never felt your heart try to beat out of your chest like this. Or maybe you had.

"Is it really so absurd to think we've always been so close?" Theo asks, eyes very clearly focused on your lips. Not that you noticed of course.

"Maybe not," you reply, letting your head fall to rest on the boy's chest.

This was nice you thought to yourself as Theo's lips pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head.

"How long do you want to keep going?" Theo asks after a moment.

"Don't know," you reply, feeling his eyes on you as you continue gazing out at the sky in front of you.

"Another month?" Theo asks carefully, pulling you ever closer.

You can feel your heart begin to race at the idea of it all ending so soon. You shake your head.

"You want to end it sooner?" Theo asks, voice wavering ever so slightly.

You shake your head again. You hear Theodore's sharp breath as he realizes your implication and you feel yourself growing increasingly more nervous as the silence stretches on.

You'd really, truly never allowed yourself to consider the idea of ending up with Theo. You knew that simply wasn't how the world worked. And frankly the idea of rejection couldn't even be a possibility. You couldn't allow yourself to lose your best friend. Or maybe you could. This was all his idea to begin with after all.

"What if we just kept going?" You ask finally, feeling the weight of the world lift off your shoulders.

Theo's arms tear away from you as he turns you to face him, hand holding your chin firmly in place, forcing your eyes to meet.

"Don't play with me like this, principessa," he says, voice all seriousness as his eyes scan your face, searching for anything that might suggest you're joking with him.

"I'm not."

And just like that, Theo's lips are on yours once more. They seemed to find themselves there a lot lately, melting your mind to absolute mush as he pulled you closer. You could feel your back, now pressed up against one of the marble pillars of the tower as Theo's lips moved slowly from your lips to your jawline, and carefully down the side of your neck.

"You can say you love me now," He whispers into your ear, his warm breath giving you chills as his hands continue to wander.

"I love you," you gasp out.

"Sorry, who?" he pushes, leaving little pecks across your jawline once more.

"Theo. I love you, Theodore," You say finally, just as Theo presses another kiss to your lips.

"And I love you, amore."

Did I start this well over a year ago? Yes I did, thank you for asking. Did I change the title three different times? Absolutely I did. Am I posting this before editing? Also yes. Cope.

[nataliesewell]

Ten/Martha + Bridgerton AU (inspo)

Dearest reader, The season has only just begun, and the ton is already abuzz over a most peculiar development. It appears Lady Martha Jones has captured the interest of the Duke of Lungbarrow. After several dances in ballrooms and discussions at dinner parties, noted by many a curious onlooker, there can be no doubt about it: the Duke is courting the young miss. The hopes of mamas everywhere may be crushed for a second time. It was a year ago, after all, that the Duke of Lungbarrow had become engaged to the Honorable Rose Tyler. Though we all remember how that match fared. Since then, the Duke has been adamant that he will never marry. Lady Martha Jones's fine features, however, have turned his head—and perhaps changed his intentions as well. This must be wonderful news for her mama, who has been particularly vocal about procuring a suitable match for her second daughter this season. But has the Duke finally come out of the sullens and committed himself to finding a wife? This author cannot say for certain. Rest assured, I will be keeping a close eye on the situation. Yours truly, Lady Whistledown

[silknspice]

hockey!vi and basketball!caitlyn decide it's time to stop fighting over you. they'll just have to share!

headcanons, arguing, smut/slutty material (18+ mdni), dom!cait & vi, gp!vi, cheerleader!reader (hardly mentioned), vi & cait r horny and reader's hard-to-get-but-also-horny. wc. 2k

vi's a big, bulky, 'gentleman' of a player. girls come and go from her poster-covered dorm room, and it's fine, because she has bigger things to worry about, until she meets you. the post-game crowd is a chaotic swarm of students, and still, she spots you with ease. you're with a friend that she somewhat recognizes, but the athlete swears on her life she's never seen you. she would've remembered a pretty ass face like that. the two of you are making conversation with one of her teammates, and almost immediately the pinkette's jogging up to the cluster of you and slinging an arm over the other player.

she's decorated with a big fat grin like always, cooing a sexy "hey there," that has her teammate rolling her eyes into the back of her head, but not the way vi intended. you're introduced, a sweet smile gracing your lips that vi wants buried between the flesh of her thighs, lips that she wants gasping for life as she ravishes you, lips that she swears just made her cock twitch.

"you gonna be looking for me at the after party?" she cocks her head in fake innocence. what an asshole. "maybe if you score some more next time," you dismiss her with a tucked away grin, politely biding her teammate and spinning off out of the dumbfounded butch's sight. her teammate sharply inhales, patting the girl who looks like she's just seen a ghost. "tough luck, vi," the athlete starts, "wouldn't have worked anyway, i heard she's messing with kiramman."

caitlyn won the race to your attention. it's one of the many things she adores holding over vi's head when they have their daily bicker-fests over anything and everything related to you. she’d always believed in finders keepers.

the bustling, alcohol scented, dim atmosphere encasing her is completely forgotten as her gaze lands on you, a red solo cup in hand as you make conversation with who she assumes to be your teammates. she squares her shoulders, standing a little taller as her fellow athletes notice the look she's giving you. a predator ready to pounce. little whistles of encouragement fall from their lips as she strides on her mission to you.

the navy haired beauty knows she's hot, knows damn well anyone would slide their way under her as soon as the words of approval coat her tongue, and knows that you'll be one of her most– no, the most rewarding catch she's had. except, her trap seemed to falter.

"you were great today," she flashes a soft smile, attempting to make sure the way she checks you out is subtle, less cocky and more in awe. "watched when i could, i see why they put you in front." "oh yeah?" you hum out, sipping from your cup. it's basic, not giving much for caitlyn to work with, but the glint in your eyes is giving the athlete all too much hope. "yeah," she sounds a little breathless. her eyelids drop and soften to mimick the arousal she's feeling from just eyeing your fuckable face. "must be real flexible to do all that. think you could show me some more?" her prim and enchanting accent is completely contradicting the nasty insinuations falling from her mouth. that has you gently shaking your head and scoffing– albeit, with a smile, caitlyn notes. "you're funny, cait." and that's all you leave her with. that, and the image of you gently swaying your hips while walking off. the image that she'll be replaying in her head as she tends to her needs later that night. it makes sense to her a few days later during practice. when she and her teammates are lazily walking off of the court, one of them explains your oh so suspicious behavior. "heard she's interested in vi. sorry hotshot, looks like you've met your match."

from then on, the two are completely at each other's throats. it starts off small when they bump into each other at the campus coffee shop. they're patiently waiting for their drinks. caitlyn's arms are crossed as always with her hair in a messy pony, and vi's hands keep refuge in her pockets while her shoulders slightly slouch in a relaxed manner. they're completely ignoring the other's presence, until vi physically has to speak up.

"so... ___" she says your name like a child praying to their goddess. caitlyn hums in response. "i hate to be the one to tell you, but she's completely out of your league." "well i don't know what she'd see in a narcissistic mongoose like you," vi quips. cait scoffs. "and i'm not sure why she'd ever give someone as run through as you the time of day... wait, mongoose?"

soon, it's not one that's pursuing you at a time, it's both. at parties, after games, walking to class, even in the library, the two girls are drawn to you like moths to light. and sure, they're still very interested in fucking you senseless if you let them. and sure, they don't know you all too well yet, but something about you is so captivating. whether you'll give them the time of day or not, they crave being in your presence. (the rivalry is making things a little more fun than expected, too.)

you're interested, extremely interested. but these girls are used to getting everything they want in the blink of an eye. you know your worth, so if they want to take you, and not just your ability to walk, they're going to have to work for it. in record time, the university of piltover's finest were wrapped around your dainty finger. so, slowly, you let them into your life.

at first, it's smaller things. in the morning, caitlyn worms her way into the plush seat next to you at your library table. she sets down your coffee order to a T, saying she "had some extra time" (which isn't a lie, she woke up an hour earlier than she already does to make sure her timing was perfect), and she "didn't know what you'd like", so she 'guessed' (that part was a lie, because she fell asleep thirty minutes later than usual stalking your instagram highlights and zooming into the label of your most recent drink). in conclusion, the star player was losing sleep over you, and she didn't know how to feel about that.

then, like switching shifts, vi swoops into the library and whisks you away, but not before making a remark that has the navy-haired girl's brows furrowing.

"i'll take it from here, cupcake. angel and i have a date." the pinkette lifts your backpack from the ground and slings it over her shoulder before you can utter a word. "you're walking me to class, violet. 'ts not a date..." you dismiss the claim, looking caitlyn in the eyes as you bring the coffee to your lips and take a swig. "..yet," you induce some hope and fear into the respective girls. as you coo your mind-twirling sing-song "bye cait," and walk away, vi can't help but snake a hand around your waist before throwing a terribly taunting wink to the bluenette over her shoulder.

eventually, after more interrupted touches and argument after argument, the girls attempt to seduce you on their own turf. after a particularly hard but victorious game, cait jogs up to you. the flyaways of her ponytail are the sexiest amount of messy and the sweat dripping down the side of her neck and rounding towards her adams apple has you gulping. but of course, you hide it. you admit, she's impressed you, and the seemingly suave girl fights the beaming smile she feels sneaking its way onto her face. instead, she thanks you for cheering for her and gently grazes her hand over the hem of your blue and white skirt.

"is this my reward for playing so well?" she grins. "this is my uniform, hotshot."

after vi's hockey game that she insisted you come to, she sneaks up on you after exiting the locker room, capturing your frame from behind with sculpted arms. the two of you stiffle a few laughs before she turns you around, pulling your torso closer to hers.

"how'd I do?" she asks, the neediness of approval hidden somewhere in her tone.

"i guess you were good," you joke, making vi gently pinch at your side. "yeah?" she teases, "how good?" "not good enough, at least I score." caitlyn buts in from 'out of nowhere!' (vi claims), momentarily stunning whatever tension you and the pinkette were building. "i scored three times," the powder-blue eyed girl slightly pouts, sending you into a fit of laughter.

it's vi who steals a kiss from you first. you finally give in after realizing maybe she wants something a little more than sex. it's hungry, slight teeth, lots of tongue, and sloppy hums of pleasure. wandering hands travel to the back of your head, through your hair, down to the curve of your waist, everywhere she can claim you.

caitlyn, when she finds out a day later, is pissed. so when she finally gets her hands on you, she's rougher than she planned on being when she ran this scenario through her head hundreds of times before. she's pushing you against a wall, knee slotted between your legs, and a lanky hand trails up to grip your chin. it's rough, hypnotizing, and you have to stop her before she makes an absolute mess of you.

it's no surprise when the girls text you to meet up a few days later. what is a surprise is the fact that they're together. they send you a selfie from vi's phone in your shared group chat. vi looks delicious in her stupid backwards baseball cap and caitlyn's glasses only enhance that scarily sexy cold look she owns. the picture's lazy, a lower angle of the two looking at the camera with soft grins, but it has your heartbeat racing, and something else pulsing their names.

ice queen: angel come 2 cait's ice queen: we miss you <3 angel: and if I don't? hotshot: you'll regret it. angel: is that a threat? hotshot: jesus, get over here.

caitlyn and vi take turns using you for the rest of the night. they wait for you to make the first move, of course, they have manners. once you're all hot and bothered you hear the clank of their belts coming undone and flashes of clothes being stripped off fill your vision.

cait only spends so long teasing your swollen clit before she's two fingers and three knuckles deep inside of you, teasing your clouded brain about adding a third. the wet sounds your body's making are getting vi the hardest she's been in her life, and she swears she could cum just from the way your glossy eyes look up at her while cait ravishes you. "look at that- i'll be the one to make her cum first." cait taunts, and as soon as you've reached your high the pinkette's stripping you away from her and flipping you onto your stomach.

vi's gentler than caitlyn at first, but her passion and desires enchant her mind and soon she's stuffing your needy hole with her length, face down ass up, while pushing your head into the pillow that captures your lovely noises.

it's not long before caitlyn's sitting in front of you with her legs spread wide, guiding your tongue right where it belongs.

you all sleep in the same bed that night. you in the middle, of course, and your girls clinging to you lovingly. the three of you talk about everything and nothing at the same time, and the silly conversations lull you into a deep sleep.

some day soon, you'll have to talk about whatever this is. for right now, vi and caitlyn relish in the fact that they have you. brain, heart, body and all.

sharing isn't all that bad.

silknspice

[lupinqs]

FIRSTS ━━ paige bueckers x azzi fudd

☆ ━ summary: paige and azzi’s firsts.

☆ ━ word count: 12.9K (jesus)

☆ ━ warnings: slight smut, angst, fluff.

☆ ━ author’s notes: hiiii!!!! this is my first time posting on tumblr, even though i’ve literally been lurking on here for actual years… yeah! but i write on both wattpad and ao3 and decided that i might as well start publishing my work on here too. i hope you enjoy!!

I. MAY 2017

They're at the USA basketball U16 Trials, the gym buzzing with the energy of teenage girls and their need to prove themselves. The court echoes with the sounds of squeaking sneakers and bouncing basketballs. Two teams have been created—jerseys and no jerseys—for a practice scrimmage. The air is thick with anticipation, the scent of fresh sweat mingling with the sharp tang of floor polish. 

Paige adjusts her jersey, fingers brushing against the cool, breathable fabric. She stretches her arms overhead, feeling the muscles lengthen and relax. Her eyes scan the court, taking in the familiar sights and sounds of the game she loves. She's been here before, in this exact position, waiting for the competition to begin, and each time it feels like the most important moment of her life. The adrenaline hums in her veins, a steady current of energy that she channels into focus.

The whistle blows, sharp and clear, slicing through the ambient noise. It's not long before Paige's team is on defense, and she positions herself near the top of the key, ready.  

Paige doesn't think much of anything when she first sets eyes on the girl she's guarding. The blonde made a few fast friends earlier in the morning and this girl surely isn't one of them. She doesn't know her; doesn't care about knowing her; doesn't think about knowing her. She doesn't notice the way her brown eyes are glazed over with focus, the slight crinkle in between her brows as she furrows them, the way her mouth hangs open ever so slightly. In fact, Paige's eyes barely scan the girl before they trail right back to the orange basketball set in her hands. She watches as the girl dribbles the ball with a practiced ease, focus unwavering.

Paige moves into a defensive stance, eyes never leaving the basketball. Knees bent, arms outstretched, the blonde is ready to react to any move the girl before her might make. She can feel the eyes of the coaches on her, the pressure of the moment heavy on her shoulders. But she thrives on this; the intensity sharpens her focus. 

The dribbling of the girl before Paige is rhythmic, almost meditative, the ball bouncing in a steady beat that matches the thumping in the blonde's chest. For a short moment, the pair stay like that, testing the waters. And then the girl starts to move, shifting her weight from one foot to the other, gauging Paige's reaction. She fakes left, then darts right, the ball a blur between her hands. Paige follows, movements fluid and quick, matching the girl step for step.

The girl changes pace, pushing off her back foot and driving toward the basket. Paige is right there, her hand reaching out instinctively. Her fingers brush against the ball, and in a split second, she hooks it cleanly from the other girl's grasp.

Paige takes off down the court, her legs pumping, heart pounding in her chest. She hears the surprised gasps and murmurs from the sidelines, but she blocks it all out. All that matters is the basket ahead of her. She dodges a defender, movements a blur of agility and speed. With a final burst of energy, she leaps toward the hoop, laying the ball gently against the backboard. It falls through the net with a satisfying swish.

It's what she does best: steals, swifts, scores.

☆

The scrimmage ends with the final whistle and the players disperse, heading for their water bottles and towels. The gym slowly empties out as everyone make their way to the locker rooms. Paige follows suit, breathless and sweaty as she walks alongside Celeste and Jordan, two girls she made friends with at the beginning of the day. She takes slow, methodic sips from her water bottle as she does her best to return her heart rate and breathing back to what it was before all the cardio. 

After a moment, Paige excuses herself from her new friends, heading to the bathroom. It's quiet in there, only for the faint hum of the ventilation system. Paige goes to a stall and locks the door behind her. She takes a deep breath, feeling the adrenaline that only basketball can bring her slowly ebbing away. It's not long before she flushes and exits the stall, heading to wash her hands. 

As she approaches, she notices the girl from before standing at the sink, hands under the running water. Paige hesitates for a second, then moves to the sink next to her, the proximity making her suddenly aware of the dull silence between them. The blonde turns on the faucet, letting the cold water rush over her hands. She glances sideways at the girl, who's now drying her hands with a paper towel. 

Despite Paige's initial steal on the girl, it turns out she's a total bucket-getter. She'd surprised Paige and certainly got her revenge on her, scoring four three-pointers right over the blonde's head. Each one had swished so perfectly that all Paige could think was: sharpshooter. 

It takes Paige a moment to summon her courage and confidence—considering it's usually right on the surface and doesn't need to be summoned—but when she does, she speaks. 

"Hey," she says, voice breaking the quiet of the sterile bathroom. "You were great out there. Seriously, like, one of the best shooters I've ever gone against." 

The girl looks up, eyes meeting Paige's. There's a moment of surprise, followed by a small but genuine smile. "Thanks," she replies, voice warm and somehow smooth like butter. "You're really good, too. Surprised me a little bit, actually," she adds, a joking tone curling around her vocals. 

Paige lets an offended yet amused smile overtake her features, putting a hand on her heart as she amusedly says, "Hey!" 

The girl isn't on her own there, though. Paige knows that most people who look like her—skinny as bones and white as paper—can't play basketball like her. She's had people doubt her since she was little, but she manages to prove them wrong every time. Another case in point right here. 

Before the other girl can retort back, Paige asks, curious, "What's your name?"

"I'm Azzi," the girl answers, her smile widening just enough for a dimple to appear. 

Azzi, Paige notes, tucking it in the back of her mind, thinking it may be important one day. Whether that be sooner or later. 

And now, for the first time, Paige lets herself really look at this girl—Azzi, she reminds herself. She's probably about an inch or so shorter than Paige, and she's got tan skin and dark, curly hair that's been pulled back into two braids. Her brows, without the furrow of intensity she held during the game, lay flat, smoothing her forehead and giving her a softer look. Her brown eyes are deep and expressive, framed by long lashes. Her lips are full and her jawline is sharp but soft, with a smooth curve to it. Her two front teeth are slightly longer than the others, a bit like bunny teeth, and the dimples digging into her cheeks are charming in a way Paige has never seen before. 

And there, Paige realizes—with a slight sense of embarrassment—just how pretty Azzi is. 

It's a realization that catches her off guard, and—humiliatingly—she stumbles over her words as she introduces herself, coughing out, "'m Paige." 

Azzi nods, and Paige does her absolute hardest to try to push down the blush she can feel rising in her cheeks as the girl murmurs, "It's nice to meet you, Paige." 

Azzi's slowly walking towards the bathroom door now, and as she opens it, she adds, calling over her shoulder, "Hopefully next time we can be on the same team."

Paige stands there by the sinks, slightly frozen as she responds, "Yeah." 

Only after Azzi has closed the door behind her, leaving Paige alone there in the bathroom, the blonde adds, voice low in a whisper meant only for herself, "Hopefully."

II. AUGUST 2018

"Az, can you get my back?" Paige's voice echoes from the bathroom, where she's been applying sunscreen to her pale skin for the last few minutes. 

Azzi hums in response, halting her movements of packing her small drawstring up. She glances at her bag, half-full with essentials for their boat outing, before heading towards the bathroom. 

They're at the lake house, the last month of summer in full force. Azzi's grateful to get away from home for a little while, now in a different kind of home that she much prefers to the other.

The door to the bathroom is slightly ajar, and Azzi pushes it open gently. Paige is standing there, clad in her hot pink bikini—the girl sure does love her bright colors, Azzi knows that—with her back exposed, a bottle of sunscreen in hand. The sight of Paige is one Azzi has grown accustomed to over the past year, yet, especially more recently, it never fails to send a jolt through her. Paige's skin is a blank canvas, pale and soft, a stark contrast to Azzi's own tan complexion.

"Gimme," Azzi says, hand reaching for the bottle. Her voice is steady despite the unmistakable flutter of those butterfly wings she feels in her chest, her stomach, her everywhere. They've got the kind of pitter-patter that only Paige can bring her. And it only worsens when the blonde looks back at Azzi, meeting her eyes, baby blue on chocolate brown, hands brushing as Paige gives the younger girl the bottle, a stupid, beautiful grin of gratitude stretching her features. Azzi ignores the feeling, having grown accustomed to that, too, instead taking the bottle and squirting a generous amount of sunscreen into her palm. 

Paige pulls her hair to one side, giving Azzi full access to her back. Azzi's hands hover for a moment—a stupid hesitation considering how much she and Paige touch each other—before she gently places them on the older girl's shoulders, starting at the top and working her way down. The lotion spreads smoothly, a thin layer of protection against the summer sun. 

As her hands move across Paige's back, Azzi doesn't miss the silence. It's odd. Paige is such a chatter box that Azzi really never gets any silence when around her. Azzi remembers being a bit fed up with Paige last year because of it. It was in the earliest stages of their relationship, following them both securing their own roster spots on the FIBA U16 team. Paige was always talking and talking and talking, and Azzi was tired. Maybe it was because Paige was never talking to her. For some odd reason, that whole month of USA basketball, Paige had been such a babbler with anyone and everyone that didn't have the name Azzi Fudd. At first, Azzi thought Paige didn't like her. It made sense: Paige wouldn't speak to her, wouldn't make eye contact with her (on the off chance that their eyes did meet, Paige would immediately flit her own to anything that wasn't the chocolate color of Azzi's irises), and sometimes stared at her like she was something else completely. It made Azzi uncomfortable and even a little disheartened because they played so well together, and yet this girl wouldn't give her the light of day off the court. Of course, Paige was never rude to her. Azzi knows that Paige hardly even has the capacity to fulfill the word, ever the people pleaser. If Azzi spoke to her, Paige would respond kindly. She just never went out of her way to start the conversions on her own. And Azzi guesses she shouldn't have cared that much about it, except that Paige would start conversations with everyone else. In a way, it made her feel alienated.

However, it didn't take too long for Azzi to realize that whatever Paige's shyness around her was caused by, it wasn't that the blonde disliked her. Because whenever their team took group photos, the spot next to Azzi always seemed to be taken by Paige. The weight of the older girl's palm on Azzi's waist, the way their shoulders brushed as the camera would snap the shot, quickly became familiar nature between the two of them. And then, when they won the gold medal, Azzi was the first person Paige went to. Paige had let out a little scream of victory before launching herself into Azzi, arms wrapping around the younger girl's neck. They'd never been that close before, and Azzi recalls it making her head spin slightly. They had been sweaty and full of adrenaline, and Azzi had let herself hold onto Paige tightly, because they'd won. And then, in line while getting their medals, the pair held hands and Azzi got her first taste of what Paige's fingers felt like intertwined with her own. 

Truly though, the turning point was the flight back to Minnesota. Azzi supposes Paige was feeling bold, because as soon as the blonde's eyes set on her, she made a beeline for the seat right next to Azzi. Despite the celebratory affinity they'd shared earlier in the week, it caught Azzi a bit off guard. And yet, as soon as Paige sat down next to her, all that chatter that Azzi had watched the girl bestow upon their teammates was suddenly entirely reserved for her. Throughout the whole flight, Paige talked and talked and talked, and Azzi listened and listened and listened. They shared grins and fought to hide blushes and when the plane finally landed, it sealed the deal for Azzi. 

This chatterbox, bottle blonde, skinny white girl (that also happened to be one of the prettiest people Azzi had ever laid eyes on) was meant to be her best friend. 

So, now that they're standing here, Azzi's hands on Paige's skin, and Paige isn't saying anything, and Azzi—true to her quiet, listening nature—isn't either, things feel strange. The younger girl doesn't know why Paige is silent. She certainly doesn't let herself get so far as to guessing, though, because she knows that her mind will only take her to places she shouldn't go. Places she knows Paige has never let herself go to. 

But it's difficult. The silent air between them is thick, charged with a tension that's always there but never so predominant as now. Each touch sends a spark through Azzi, a reminder of the stupid fucking feelings she's been harboring for months now. It's maddening that Paige, her best friend of all people, has suddenly become the center of Azzi's thoughts, the place her mind always seems to be wandering back to. 

But, really, Azzi thinks, if you knew Paige, how could she not? She's a vibrant hue in a world of grey, so full of life. She's got a laugh that lights up any (and every) room she walks in, and a smile that makes Azzi's heart skip a beat. For Azzi, being around Paige is like basking in the warmth of the sun—comforting, but sometimes too intense to bear. 

Azzi's fingers brush against the nape of Paige's neck, and she feels a shiver run through her body. Her touch is careful, deliberate, but the closeness makes it hard to ignore the fluttering in her stomach. She takes a deep breath, hoping to steady her racing heart.

Azzi finishes spreading the sunscreen, her hands lingering for a fraction of a second longer than necessary. In that brief moment, she's acutely aware of everything—the warmth of Paige's skin under her fingertips, the faint scent of the sunscreen mingling with Paige's own subtle fragrance, the soft rise and fall of Paige's breath.

She pulls her hands away, taking a step back. Paige turns to face her, a grateful smile on her lips. "Thanks, Az."

Az, Az, Az, Az. Azzi's mind replays the way her nickname sounds falling from Paige's lips. 

"Mhm," Azzi hums, her voice more casual than she feels. 

And, before anything else can be said between the two of them, Katie calls out from downstairs, "You girls ready yet? We're waiting on you!"

"Yeah, we're coming!" Azzi calls back, grateful for the interruption. She gives Paige one last smile before heading out of the bathroom, her heart still pounding in her chest.

☆

Azzi's tired, curled up under the quilt laid upon her bed. Her bones ache with exhaustion, her skin burns from the extra exposure to the sun, her eyes are red and sore from rubbing all of the lake water out of them. She scrolls mindlessly on her phone, knowing she won't be able to sleep until Paige is over whatever energy burst she's got right now. 

The blonde girl is sprawled on the floor, digging through her duffle bag vigorously, searching for something she clearly needs. When she began the hunt a few minutes ago, Azzi asked what she was looking for and offered to help, but Paige had only waved her off, saying she'd find it herself. Azzi rolled her eyes and collapsed back onto her bed, trying to ignore the annoying sounds of Paige zipping and unzipping her bag, as well as tossing items along the floor. 

Azzi notices when Paige finally finds what she's been so longingly looking for. The shuffling halts, and Azzi sees Paige stand from the corner of her eye. Azzi begrudgingly sits up in bed, eyes set on her best friend, raising her brows ludicrously as she sees Paige's hands holding something behind her back, almost as if she's hiding it from Azzi. 

"Don't be mad, okay?" the blonde says slowly, smile full of suppressed energy. Azzi catches the spark that glints in Paige's eyes, a hint of mischief that usually means trouble. 

The younger girl rolls her eyes, ignoring the comment. "What do you have, Paige?" she asks, feeling a little bit like a mother that's about to have to reprimand her child. 

Paige, sheepishly, pulls a small object that's tucked in a ziplock baggie from behind her back, holding it up with a hopeful grin. 

Azzi's eyes widen and her jaw drops in surprise. Whatever she thought her best friend was hiding, it wasn't a blunt. But there it is, and Azzi can't help but stumble out, "Where did you even get that?"

"One of my friends from back home gave it to me when I told her I'd never smoked before. Said it was good stuff," Paige replies, grin widening. "I brought it here and, well... thought we should try it?" 

Azzi feels the familiar hand of anxiety wrap it's fingers around her rib cage. She gulps, asking incredulously, "Are you serious? What if we get caught? My parents will kill us!" 

"It was a long day, they're knocked out," Paige reasons, her tone reassuring. "No one's going to catch us. Besides, don't you wanna try it? Just once?"

Azzi bites her lip, torn between the thrill of doing something forbidden and the fear of getting caught. Her mind races with the possible consequences, the weeks of grounding she'd face should her parents find out about this. But then she looks at Paige, who's watching her with those bright blue eyes, full of excitement and trust.

"C'mon, Azzi," Paige coaxes. "It'll be fun. Just you and me. We've never done anything like this before. Don't you wanna know what it feels like?"

The logic is flimsy, but Paige's enthusiasm is infectious, per usual. Azzi feels a thrill of rebellion bubbling up inside her, fueled by the day's excitement and the safety of her parents' sure exhaustion. She takes a deep breath and nods.

"Okay, fine. But we have to be careful," Azzi says seriously, feeling a mix of excitement and anxiety.

Paige's face lights up with a triumphant smile. "Deal. Let's sneak out the back."

They move quietly through the dark cabin, careful not to wake anyone. The night air is cool against Azzi's skin as she and Paige slip out the back door, making their way down to the dock. The lake is a mirror, reflecting the starlit sky, and the only sound is the soft rustling of leaves and the gentle splash of water against the wooden posts. It's comforting; no one is out here to catch them. 

The pair sit on the edge of the dock, legs dangling over the water. Azzi watches, heart pounding in her chest, as Paige fumbles with a lighter, her hands shaking slightly with anticipation.

"Ready?" Paige asks, looking at Azzi with a mix of excitement and nervousness. 

Azzi nods, her stomach a knot of nerves. Slowly, Paige brings the blunt to her lips and flicks the lighter, the small flame dancing in the night. As the blunt is lit, she takes a deep drag, holding the smoke in her lungs before exhaling slowly. She coughs a bit, but otherwise does pretty well for her first time. If Azzi didn't know better, she'd think her best friend has done this before. 

"Your turn," Paige says, passing the blunt to Azzi.

The younger girl takes it with trembling hands, bringing it to her lips. She mimics Paige, inhaling deeply. The smoke burns her throat, feeling like fire, and as soon as it makes contact with it, she coughs violently, tears springing to her eyes. Beside her, Paige laughs softly, patting her on the back.

"It gets easier, I think," Paige does her best to assure her, taking another drag and passing it back.

They continue like this, passing the blunt back and forth. Paige was right; each drag becomes a little easier than the last. The initial discomfort gives way to a strange, floating sensation. Azzi feels lightheaded, her thoughts fuzzy and her body relaxed.

The tension that Azzi has felt lingering between them all day seems to dissipate, dissolving into the lake air, replaced by a sense of peace and friendship. They giggle at nothing and everything, words flowing freely as the high takes hold.

"You know, I've always thought you were like, the coolest person ever," Paige breaks the silence, her voice dreamy and sincere.

Azzi laughs, feeling a warm glow spread through her chest. "Please," she scoffs lightly, rolling her eyes. That makes her feel a little dizzy; she notes not to do that again. "You're the cool one, Paige. You're so confident and, just, like, fearless. I wish I could be more like you."

Paige shakes her head, eyes bright and unfocused, irises tinted pink. "Nah, you've got this... quiet strength," she murmurs slowly, trying to find her words through the haze of intoxication. "You're always there, you know? Always solid. I really admire that."

The words strike a chord in Azzi, her heart swelling with affection. "Thanks, P," she mumbles, trying to keep her voice steady. "That means a lot."

They fall into a comfortable silence, the sounds of the night filling the gaps between their words. Crickets chirp, leaves rustle, the breeze ruffles the water slightly. Azzi feels a strange sense of peace, a connection to Paige that goes beyond what she can put into words. It's as if the high has stripped away all the pretense, leaving only the raw, unfiltered truth of their friendship.

Azzi's mind drifts to the past year, to all the moments they've shared. Late-night FaceTimes, endless basketball practices and 1v1s, and quiet moments like this one. She thinks about how much Paige means to her, how her presence has become nothing short of a constant source of comfort and joy.

And then, unbidden, comes the realization of just how deep her feelings run. It's not just some crush she's got; it's something more profound, more terrifying. Azzi thinks she feels that certain way about Paige. She can't think it, can't conjure up that certain word, but, deep down, in that corner of her heart that's reserved exactly for the blonde girl and no one else, Azzi knows. And, no matter how terrifying it is, it's real. It makes her heart ache with longing.

"Hey, Azzi?" Paige's voice breaks through the younger girl's thoughts, soft and curious. 

"Yeah?"

"Have you ever thought about... you know, like, what it would be like to be with someone? Like, really be with them?"

Azzi's heart skipped a beat, her mind racing. "Yeah, I guess I have," she murmurs. I imagine being with you, she fights the urge to say. Instead, she adds, "Why do you ask?"

Paige shrugs, looking out at the lake. "I don't know. Just wondering. Sometimes, I think about it, and it's weird, you know?" She pauses, and Azzi guesses it's to gather her thoughts. "Like, how do you know if you really like someone or if it's just... I don't know, a crush?"

Azzi swallows hard, trying to keep her voice steady. "I think you just... know," she murmurs, nearly choking on the words. "It's like, you can't stop thinking about them, and you want to be around them all the time. They make you feel... different."

Paige turns to look at her, her eyes searching Azzi's face. "Yeah, I guess you're right. It's just... confusing."

Azzi nods, her heart aching with unspoken words. "Yeah, it is."

Another bout of silence settles around them like a warm embrace, the lake shimmering under the starlit sky as the pair continue passing the blunt back and forth. Azzi's mind fogs thick with cannabis, the effects of the drug heightening her senses. Her anxiety is long gone, replaced by a much gentler buzz. She looks over at Paige, who's watching the ripples on the lake with a dreamy expression. 

It's not long before Paige speaks again, unable to bear silence. Even high, she remains a chatterbox. Azzi would never admit it, but she finds it slightly endearing.

"You know," Paige begins, her voice soft and contemplative, "I've never kissed anyone before."

Azzi turns to her, nearly choking at the admission. She didn't think their conversation would take a turn like this. And... truthfully, she's quite surprised. She knows how sought after Paige is; she's witnessed it. "Really?"

Paige nods, a small smile playing on her lips. "Yeah. What about you?"

Azzi hesitates for a moment. She thinks about lying; she doesn't know why. However, all thoughts of that go out the window when she meets Paige's gaze. It's full of a tenderness that's beckoning her, begging her, to be honest. "No," she mumbles. "I've never kissed anyone either."

The words hang between them, a delicate thread of unspoken desires and uncertainties. Azzi dares a glance at Paige, meeting her eyes briefly before looking away, a blush creeping up her cheeks. She curses herself for it, wishing she were able to hide it better. 

Azzi feels Paige shift closer, their shoulders brushing. Her breath hitches slightly at the contact, the warmth of Paige's presence sending a shiver down her spine. "Azzi," Paige whispers, her voice barely audible over the gentle lapping of the lake.

Azzi turns to face Paige fully, her heart pounding in her chest. She feels slightly nauseous as Paige's eyes search hers. She can't tell what exactly is swirling in Paige's pupils. Azzi has an idea, but it's so ludicrous she thinks she should never let the thought enter her own head ever again. 

"Have you ever thought about... what it would be like to kiss a girl?" Paige's words are soft, tentative, testing the waters. 

It's safe to say they nearly make Azzi fall into the lake and drown. 

The younger girl feels her cheeks flush with warmth, the question catching her off guard. She looks down at her hands, picking at a loose thread on her shorts. She knows the answer. It's a simple yes or no question. And yet, it takes so much strength to say the words. Because it's terrifying. It's absolutely mortifying. Maybe if Azzi had thought about kissing literally any other girl, it wouldn't be so bad. But it's the fact that the girl she's thought about kissing, and liking to kiss, is Paige... that's what truly scares Azzi.

"Um," Azzi stumbles, coughing. She doesn't let the tears that she feel behind her eyes spring up. She's braver than that. "Yeah. I have," she finally admits quietly, her voice barely above a whisper.

Paige's expression softens, a tender understanding in her eyes. It makes Azzi know what's coming next. "Me too," Paige murmurs, her gaze lingering on her best friend's face. "Sometimes, I think about what it would be like."

(Azzi might actually die.)

There's a pause, a shared moment of vulnerability hanging between them. Azzi feels a knot in her stomach, a mix of fear and anticipation. This conversation feels like a threshold they're tiptoeing towards, a door they're both hesitant to open but curious to explore. Maybe every single little thing she thought was one sided... isn't. 

Paige reaches out, her thumb gently tracing the indent of where Azzi's dimple is. It's a familiar gesture, one that Azzi has grown used to, but tonight, under the influence and with the weight of their words hanging in the air, it feels different. Paige's touch lingers, and it makes Azzi's lungs feel like they're going out. 

Without a word, Paige's hand slides along Azzi's jawline and moves to cup her cheek, her touch warm and tender. Their eyes meet, and in that moment, every single little thing, every single line they've not yet crossed, seems to shift right before their very eyes. Azzi can feel the rhythm of her heart echoing in the silence between them, a steady drumbeat of anticipation.

Azzi closes her eyes, surrendering to the moment, the high helping her do so. It's a soft press of lips that starts it, barely a graze. Azzi feels their breath mingle, feels Paige's hand move from her cheek to the nape of her neck, pulling her closer. And then she deepens the kiss. 

Azzi's hand finds Paige's waist, holding her close as she leans into her, their bodies fitting together as if they've always belonged. If Azzi could get any closer to Paige, she would. The world around them seems to fade into the background, leaving only the sensation of Paige's touch, the taste of her lips against Azzi's.

When they finally pull away, Azzi's heart might as well be failing, her mind buzzing with the fact that she just kissed her best friend, who she may also be a little in love with.

She feels Paige lean her head against Azzi's shoulder, grabbing her hand and intertwining their fingers. It's familiar; something they do so often it might as well be second nature at this point. But as Paige's thumb rubs circles on Azzi's hand, the younger girl thinks this might be a little different. She hopes it's a little different.

"I'm glad it was you," Paige whispers, her voice filled with warmth and sincerity.

Azzi smiles softly, feeling something she's never quite encountered before. "Me too, P," she murmurs, heart swelling with affection. "Me too."

III. MAY 2020

It's baking night, they've decided. A little after dinner, Paige's stomach began growling, and she'd complained to Azzi that she was hungry once more. Azzi wouldn't hear it, considering this was an everyday occurrence. So, Paige had begrudgingly rolled her eyes and gone to the kitchen, searching for a snack. The cupboards were mostly bare if not for ingredients; the Fudds needed to make another grocery trip. But Paige was hungry now, so she began searching into cabinets she'd previously left untouched. Eventually, she reached the smaller ones above the microwave and stove. What she found there made her face light up in an excitement that's been dull for a few days now (what with her and Azzi's family having exhausted most of their quarantine activity ideas). In the cabinet was a litany of baking mixes, frosting, piping bags, and sprinkles. 

And, of course, when Paige begged to make cupcakes, Katie and the others were all ears. (What else can they do?)

Paige isn't very good at baking, she's found. They'd had to throw the first batch away after the girl had accidentally spilled far too much milk in, effectively ruining it. It's not her fault; she swears she's out of practice. And she is. The last time she baked was when it was just her and her mom in that apartment, when Paige was still living half-and-half with her parents following their divorce. It was before her mom moved over to Montana, met Paige's step-father, and had two more kids. They'd been cramped in a tiny kitchen, in what Paige's mom called her "temporary apartment" (it was), and it would be too cold outside to take Paige to the playground or let her shoot hoops on the concrete. So, they'd decided to try baking. It was something they loved doing together, but Paige has watched it slowly fade away because now whenever she's in Montana, Ryan and Lauren get their way and they decidedly don't like baking. So, Paige thinks it's okay that she's a little terrible at it considering she hasn't done it since she was practically still in pull-ups. 

But here, with Azzi's family, Paige also thinks she can learn to be better at it. Because it's just so easy with them. It's not as if being at home in Minnesota, or being with her mom in Montana, is difficult necessarily. She loves her dad's little house in Hopkins, where the basketball courts freeze over and there's snow more often than not. She loves her dad, who's always pushing her to be better, coaching her even though it's not his job anymore. She loves Drew and his wild need to be just like her, her own personal mini-me. She loves her step-mother and step-brother, who have raised her in more ways than one. And she loves her mom's house in Billings, with its family-fun pool and sprawling backyard. She loves her mom, who will always be her biggest supporter, no matter what. She loves Ryan and Lauren and the endless stories they always have to tell her when she's visiting. But it never quite feels whole, on either side. Almost like there's a little cavity that won't fill, no matter how much amalgam is used to try and whisk it away. 

Paige doesn't feel that here with the Fudds. There's no missing puzzle piece, no hole to fill. And she's somehow managed to worm her way right into their welcoming arms. There's this sense of utter belonging she feels here, with them, with the rhythm they've created, and she's grateful. She's grateful for Katie and Tim, who treat her nothing short of another daughter. She's grateful for Jon and Jose, who are a constant source of entertainment and chaos, poking fun and making Paige laugh until her sides ache. She's grateful for Azzi, who's her best friend, her anchor, her constant. 

Paige is just grateful to be apart of something so loving and warm, especially now when the world outside is so uncertain. 

"Paige, can you pass me the vanilla extract?" Katie's voice echoes from behind the blonde girl's back, pulling her from her thoughts. 

Paige's ears perk up at the sound of her name, and she reaches for the small bottle. "Here," she calls, tossing it to her best friend's mother. Katie catches it easily, sending the girl a grateful smile.

Paige then returns her focus back to Azzi, who's focused on mixing the batter, brows furrowed in concentration. It's the same crease she gets when she's playing, Paige realizes easily, having committed every corner of Azzi's features to memory. The blonde feels a rush of warmth when her best friend's arm lightly brushes hers, as if they haven't been practically living in each others skin for weeks now. Paige, entranced and unblinking, watches as Azzi continues mixing, taking note of the way the reflecting sunset highlights her best friend's features through the kitchen window. 

Apparently she's been staring for too long, though, because Azzi, exasperated, asks, waving a hand in front of the blonde's face, "Hello, earth to Paige? You good?"

Paige snaps back to reality, feeling a blush creeping up her cheeks. "Yeah, just thinkin'," she mutters absentmindedly, shrugging as she tries to play it off. "What did you say?"

"I asked if you wanted to lick the spoon," Azzi teases, holding out the batter-covered utensil. 

Paige smirks, responding, "Nah, I'll let you do the honors."

The blonde watches as her best friend raises her brows at the rejection, surprised. Paige just shrugs, still smirking. Azzi repeats the action, and then slowly, maybe a little too slowly, brings the spoon up to her lips. She makes eye contact with Paige, keeping the same pace as she licks the utensil, tongue flicking against it before putting the whole thing in her mouth, sucking it clean. Paige feels herself freeze as she watches, breath hitching at Azzi's actions and the look on her face as she does it. 

Jesus Christ, Paige curses in her head. It's an anomaly; she's not one to usually think or say the Lord's name in vain. But, seriously, Jesus. 

Azzi's smirk is wide as she drops the spoon in the sink. As Paige's eyes scan the younger girl's face, she decides she wants to get her back. She's about to stick her finger in the batter, ready to make a show of licking it clean just as Azzi did to her. But as her finger hovers over the bowl, she feels Katie smack her hand away, effectively ending Paige's plan and the moment she was sharing with Azzi.

"Enough of that," Azzi's mother scolds Paige, but the girl can see the hint of a smile on Katie's lips. "The cupcakes are ready for the oven."

The next half hour is spent cleaning up the mess they've made, with plenty of giggles and a few playful splashes from the sink shared between the two teenage girls. It doesn't take too long for the cupcakes to finish, and the whole family relocates to the back deck to start the decorating process. 

"These look amazing," Jose says, eyeing the cupcakes hungrily. 

"Wait until we decorate them, fatty," Jon replies, elbowing his brother in the ribs as he picks up a tube of icing. 

Paige begins decorating her own cupcake, picking blue and red colors. She hopes she has room for a husky and the word UCONN. She begins to squeeze a swirl of blue icing onto her cupcake, the air filled with the scent of vanilla and laughter as they all concentrate on their own cupcakes. 

"I think you missed a spot, P," the blonde hears Jon say from across from her, his voice too innocent to be sincere. 

Before she can even look up at him, she feels the cold spelt of frosting hitting her grey sweatshirt. Outraged, she turns to see Jon grinning at her, piping tube filled with hot pink icing still in hand. 

"Oh, you are so dead," she says, scooping up a handful of icing and launching it at the younger boy. It hits him square in the chest, and Paige thinks the look of shock on his face is utterly priceless. 

Chaos erupts. 

Jon retaliates, and it's not long before icing is flying in every direction. Paige dodges a glob of frosting thrown by Jose and responds by smearing a streak of bright red icing across his cheek. 

"Hey, stop! You guys are gonna make a mess!" Katie's voice rings out by the door, having backed away from the rambunctious food fight. Beside her, Tim is doubled over on his knees, lungs aching with his wheezing laughter. 

The four teenagers pay neither adult a piece of mind. Instead, the deck becomes a war zone. Paige soon finds herself caught in a fierce battle with Azzi. They're both laughing uncontrollably, slipping and sliding on the icing-covered deck. Azzi manages to smear a handful of frosting onto Paige's face, and the blonde retaliates by tackling the younger girl, sending them both crashing to the ground.

They lay there for a moment, breathless and laughing, before Azzi attempts to crawl away. But Paige is determined. She scrambles after Azzi, finally managing to pin her down. As the younger girl squirms beneath the blonde, Paige nuzzles her face into Azzi's neck, smearing icing everywhere. 

"Paige! Stop!" Azzi manages to squeal out between laughs; Paige knows her neck is where she's most ticklish. Azzi continues trying to wiggle free, but she's laughing much too hard to put up a real fight. 

Paige grins and pulls back slightly, only to realize their faces are inches apart. As Azzi fights to catch her breath, her eyes sparkle with mischief and something else, something deeper. Paige's heart skips a beat at it. She knows they both look ridiculous, covered in icing and laying on the dirty deck, but there's something there, between them. And it makes her heart race and stop all at once. 

For a moment, the world seems to stand still. Paige feels a rush of emotions—affection, longing, confusion. The three that always seem to be associated with Azzi. She's acutely aware of the younger girl's breath against her skin, the way their bodies are pressed together. It would be so easy to lean in, to close the gap between them. They've done it a couple times before. 

Katie's voice cuts through the moment like a knife. "Alright, enough! Go clean up, all of you. This is a disaster."

Paige, coming back to her senses, quickly breaks her stare and rolls off of Azzi, standing up and offering her best friend a hand. She helps Azzi to her feet, and they both glance around, seeing the mess they've made. A few feet away, Jon and Jose do the same. 

"We outdid ourselves this time," Paige says, a hint of amusement in her voice. 

"No kidding," the three Fudd siblings say in unison. 

☆

Paige stands under the hot spray of the shower, letting the water wash away the remnants of icing and the chaos from earlier. She closes her eyes, tilting her head back in the water, trying to relax. But all her mind can think about is her best friend, the feeling of her breath on Paige's face, her lips... 

Paige is confused. 

If only things with Azzi could be a straight path, one without all the twists and turns. She presses her hands against the cool tile wall of the shower, trying to ground herself. The water pours down her back, soothing her muscles but not her mind. Every thought leads back to Azzi, to the way her touch lingers, the way her smile lights up the room. Paige wants to scream, to cry, to laugh—all at once. She hates and loves and loathes and adores the way Azzi makes her feel. 

When she and Azzi first kissed—out on that dock nearly two years ago—it had been spontaneous, a sudden burst of emotion that Paige attributed to the weed. It had felt right in the moment, but they had never talked about it, never addressed it. They had just continued as if nothing had changed, even though everything had. And then, each subsequent kiss after only deepened Paige's confusion. Trust her, she's tried to convince herself that they're just best friends who occasionally cross a line that most don't, but deep down, she knows it's more than that. Her feelings for Azzi... they're too much, too saturated, too bright of a burst that Paige can't label them as merely friendly. 

It makes her heart and her lungs and her head ache, the uncertainty of it all. She's gone out with other girls, kissed other lips, but none of them compare to Azzi. None of them make her feel like she might implode from one look, one touch. None of them make her heart soar and plummet at the same time. For a while, Paige tried to chase that feeling, kissing all different people, searching for that high. She never found it. Because it always comes back to Azzi, to the way she makes Paige feel alive and terrified at once. It's almost like the younger girl has carved a piece of her heart and kept it, leaving Paige feeling incomplete without her. For Paige, the realization that she likes girls has been a difficult journey, fraught with self-doubt and fear. But coming to terms with her feelings for Azzi is an even greater challenge. It's one thing to accept her own sexuality; it's another to confront the possibility of loving her best friend.

And, of course the knowledge that—other than Paige—Azzi has only gone out with boys adds another layer to the blonde's confusion. It makes her feel like an outsider in Azzi's world, like she's asking for something Azzi can't give. Paige hates that thought, hates the idea of being a complication in Azzi's life. She wants to be everything to Azzi, but she's scared that she'll only end up being a burden. She tries to push those thoughts away, to focus on the present, but it's hard. The fear and longing are too strong, too deeply rooted.

When Paige finishes showering, she towels off and dresses into a Hopkins t-shirt and basketball shorts quickly, not bothering to dry her hair, letting it drip onto the floor as she walks back into Azzi's bedroom. There, she finds Azzi already settled in her bed, searching for something to watch on the TV. It's become basic tradition ever since Paige got here: watching a new movie every night (even though more often than not, they fall asleep during it). Azzi looks up and smiles warmly as Paige enters. It's a smile that makes Paige's heart flutter.

"Find somethin' yet?" Paige asks, trying to keep her voice steady. 

Azzi shakes her head. "Not yet. Come help me look."

Paige smiles and climbs into bed beside her. It's almost automatic how they cuddle up together, Azzi's head resting on Paige's shoulder, Paige's arm wrapped around Azzi's waist. This closeness is familiar, comforting, and Paige finds herself shifting her weight into her best friend further, craving the feeling. She thinks she belongs right here, holding Azzi, Azzi holding her. 

Eventually, they settle on Love, Rosie. Apparently, Azzi heard it was good on TikTok and decided they should try it. 

As the movie starts, Paige's hand begins to move almost unconsciously, tracing small circles and patterns along Azzi's inner thigh. It's something she's done countless times, just another way she expresses physical touch. As she does it, she can feel the warmth of Azzi's skin through the thin fabric of her shorts. It sends shivers down Paige's spine, and she does her best to pay attention to the TV, to ignore the way her chest feels like it's on fire. 

However, it's hard to do that when she feels Azzi shift slightly, spreading her legs just a little more. It could be a natural movement, unintentional. But Paige's heart skips a beat anyways, and she glances at Azzi, whose eyes remain fixed on the screen. Paige hesitates for a moment, unsure. And then, very slowly, she inches her hand higher on Azzi's thigh, testing the waters. When Azzi spreads her legs a bit more, Paige knows she's reading the signals right. It makes her heart stop and speed up in one go. 

Paige's fingers move with the pace of a snail but ultimately continue their journey upwards until they reach the edge of Azzi's shorts. She leans closer, her breath catching in her throat. "Can I?" she whispers, her voice barely audible.

Azzi nods slowly, her eyes still locked on the TV. Paige slips her fingers under Azzi's shorts and underwear, her touch gentle but deliberate. She's done this with other girls, but it's never felt like this. The anticipation, the excitement, the sheer intensity of the moment is almost overwhelming. She's wanted this for so long, quite literally dreamed of it, and now that it's happening, it feels surreal.

Paige begins to slowly work her fingers on Azzi's clit, movements careful and measured. Her eyes scan the younger girl's face for any sign of discomfort, but all she sees is pleasure. Azzi's breathing slowly grows more ragged, her body responding to Paige's touch in a way that makes Paige's own lungs feel heavy. As she watches Azzi, irises locked on her features, the only word that comes to mind is beautiful. 

Unable to resist any longer, Paige leans in and captures Azzi's lips in a kiss. It's only the fourth time they've ever kissed (yes, Paige may have been counting), but it feels like coming home. Azzi's lips are soft and warm, and the way she kisses back is so perfect, so desperate, that it makes Paige dizzy. The little noises Azzi makes underneath her only heighten the intensity, and Paige finds herself smirking against her best friend's lips. 

The kiss deepens, becoming more heated, more urgent. Paige's hand moves with more confidence now, her fingers working Azzi's clit with increasing intensity. Azzi moans into the kiss, her body arching against Paige's touch. It's all Paige can do to keep herself grounded, to focus on Azzi and the present. 

Paige breaks the kiss just long enough to tear Azzi's shorts and underwear off completely, her hands shaking with a mix of nerves and excitement. She positions herself between Azzi's legs, her fingers slipping inside with a confidence she's never felt before. The feeling of Azzi's warmth, her wetness, is almost too much to bear. Paige moves her fingers in and out, slow at first, then faster as Azzi's moans grow louder.

Azzi's hands grip her sheets, her eyes squeezed shut. Paige watches her, mesmerized by the sight. This is everything she's ever wanted, everything she's ever dreamed of. She leans down, capturing Azzi's lips in another kiss, her free hand tangling in Azzi's hair. The kiss is fierce, almost desperate, their tongues tangling as their bodies move together.

"Paige," Azzi whimpers. Hearing her name on Azzi's lips like that sends a jolt of desire—of absolute need—through Paige. She moves her fingers faster, pressing deeper. 

And, fuck, as Azzi repeats her name again, Paige can't help herself. She has to taste her best friend.

Paige moves down, her fingers still pumping in and out as she lowers her mouth to Azzi's core. The first taste is intoxicating, and Paige's mind goes blank with desire. She licks and sucks with a hunger she's never felt before, almost primal in a way, her fingers and tongue working in perfect harmony. All she knows is she wants Azzi to feel good, to feel perfect. 

Azzi's hips buck against Paige's mouth, her moans growing louder with each passing second. Paige feels like she's drowning in Azzi, in the taste and the smell and the feel of her. It's everything she's ever wanted and more, a dream come true. She can feel Azzi's orgasm building, the way her body tenses and her breathing quickens. Paige redoubles her efforts, determined to make it good.

"Fuck—" Azzi gasps, her voice barely more than a whisper. "'M so close, don't stop." 

Paige hums in response, the vibrations sending Azzi over the edge. She comes with a cry, her body shuddering with the force of it. Paige keeps going, prolonging Azzi's pleasure as long as she can.

Finally, Azzi collapses back on the bed, spent. Paige pulls back, her face flushed and her heart racing. She looks down at her best friend, who's gazing up at her with an expression that makes Paige's legs feel like jelly.

"Paige," Azzi whispers the girl's name again, the only word her mind can conjure. Her hands reach for her, and Paige lets herself be pulled in for a kiss. Their lips meet, softer this time. Paige sighs into it—she could kiss Azzi for hours on end and never get sick of it. 

The blonde lays down next to Azzi, ready to sleep, ignoring the ongoing movie. However, before Paige can barely close her eyes, she feels them fly open as Azzi shifts so that she's on top of Paige now, straddling her. 

Paige flushes pink, mumbling, "Az, you don't have to—"

"Shut up," the younger girl interrupts, effectively halting Paige's words. Azzi leans down, lips finding purchase on the blonde's neck. Immediately, Paige's hands fly up to Azzi's hips, gripping the skin. 

However, Azzi stops far too soon for Paige's liking, pulling away. Paige tries to mask her disappointment at the lack of feeling, eyes feeling wide as she watches her best friend's every move. 

Azzi leans closer to Paige, lips nearly brushing the older girl's as she toys with the strings of Paige's basketball shorts. Paige feels her breathing stop. 

"Do you want this?" Azzi asks, fingers slowly undoing the tie. 

Paige nods, probably a little too quick and a little too enthusiastically. "Yes."

Azzi smirks. "Good."

IV. MARCH 2022

Azzi stares at herself in the mirror, her reflection looking back with a set determination. It's been weeks since she's gone out with the team, weeks since she's allowed herself to think about anything other than basketball. Tonight, she's determined to let loose, to have fun, and to forget about everything that's happened with Paige, if only for a few hours.

"Az, you look great," Caroline says, standing beside her and applying the final touches to her own makeup. 

"She's right," Amari pitches in from where she sits on the closed toilet seat. "If Paige doesn't take you home tonight, I will."

Caroline gives Amari a little slap on the arm for bringing up the "P word," as she's dubbed it. Since the fight and the ultimate end, or break, or whatever it is, of Paige and Azzi, Azzi has made it clear that she doesn't want to talk about the Bueckers girl if not necessary. And Caroline has respected that, doing everything she can to distract her friend from anything Paige-related (unless it came to basketball, of course).

Azzi lets herself smile a little, interjecting, "Carol, it's okay." But then she does give Amari a pointed look, saying firmly, "But I will not be going home with Paige tonight. That would only make things even more fucked than they already are."

Amari nods in understanding as Caroline glances at Azzi whilst putting her lip gloss on. "So, if not Paige..." she starts in a questioning tone, "will you be going home with someone else?"

Azzi sighs, shrugging. "Depends on what happens, who I run into," she responds. "Could be a good distraction, though."

She doesn't miss the worry that flashes in Caroline's eyes at that, but she also doesn't have it in herself to care about why. She's in college, fucking someone to get her mind off something isn't exactly uncommon. 

Nonetheless, Azzi appreciates Caroline's support in more ways than she can express. She knows her friend has noticed the change in her over the past few weeks, the way she's thrown herself into training with an almost obsessive fervor. Basketball has always been her refuge, but, lately, it's become her lifeline, a way to drown out the pain of seeing Paige with other girls, of knowing she isn't enough for the person she loves most. 

Azzi takes a deep breath and adjusts the strap of her top. It's a lilac number which truthfully could pass more as a bra than the cropped tank it's labeled as. She wears it with her new, perfect jeans which she knows hug her in all the right places. She hasn't worn anything like this in ages, preferring the comfort of sweatpants and oversized hoodies. But tonight is different. Tonight, she wants to look and feel her best (and maybe get someone to help her with that last part).

"Let's go," Azzi says, squaring her shoulders. She grabs her wallet and follows Caroline and Amari out of the bathroom and into the living room where the rest of their teammates have been waiting, Paige excluded. Azzi doesn't know where the blonde is. She tells herself that she doesn't care either. 

As they walk to the bar, the chilly Storrs air nipping at their skin, Azzi can't help but think about the last time she went out with the team. She remembers the way Paige had laughed and flirted with other girls, the way she'd entertained their advances while Azzi stood by, pretending it didn't bother her. But it had. It had hurt more than she'd ever let on, and it was that night—where she watched Paige willingly leave the bar with another girl that wasn't Azzi, not even bothering to say goodbye to her best friend—that had solidified her decision to end whatever undefined thing they had between them.

Ted's is buzzing with energy and life when they arrive, music thumping and people crowding. Almost immediately, Aubrey and Aaliyah are pulling Azzi to the dance floor, getting swept up into the excitement. Azzi goes with it, swaying her hips to the music and laughing with her teammates. 

Of course, it isn't long before Azzi sets eyes on her best friend, bright blonde hair sticking out in the sea of people. Quick after, Nika, from beside Azzi, catches sight of the girl, too, eagerly calling her name and waving her over. 

When she approaches, Azzi doesn't even give her the satisfaction of looking at her. She is not letting Paige Bueckers ruin her night. 

☆

And yet, despite her proclamation, Azzi thinks she may indeed be letting Paige Bueckers ruin her night. 

The brunette girl leans against the bar, vision blurry as she tries to focus on the bartender, on the who-knows-what-number drink of the night in her hand, on anything that is not the corner of the bar on her left side. It doesn't work. Curiosity manages to get the best of her, and she finds her eyes sliding over. She watches as Paige flirts with some girl, smirking as she leans down and says something into the girl's ear. Azzi's stomach twists with jealousy and longing. She's been in that position before, knowing exactly how it feels to have Paige's breath warm against her skin, her words sending shivers down her spine. Now, all she can do is watch. It makes her want to die that she isn't the one with Paige, and that she's the reason she isn't.

You did this, she tells herself as she takes a sip from the glass in her hand, letting the alcohol burn down her throat, hoping it'll numb the ache in her chest. (It doesn't.)

"Hey, you're Azzi Fudd, right?" a voice sounds on Azzi's left side. 

At the sound of her name, Azzi glances over, eyes landing on some guy probably a year or two older than herself. He's tall—taller than Azzi—with blonde hair and cerulean blue eyes that twinkle in the light. He's cute, she thinks half-heartedly. 

"That's me," Azzi responds, managing a smile. 

"I'm Sam," the guy introduces himself, sending her a grin of his own. It's charming, the kind that most girls would swoon over. Azzi hardly even blinks at it. 

They chat for a bit, Azzi allowing herself to enjoy the attention, though admittedly pretending to be more interested than she is. He's funny, though, and she laughs at his jokes, letting herself put a hand on his arm flirtatiously. But even as she entertains him, a part of her can't stop thinking about Paige, especially because she's right behind Sam, talking to someone who isn't Azzi. 

Azzi tries not to sigh, thinking about how many times they've done this. Gone out, had fun, flirted with other people, only to end up in each other's arms by the end of the night. Still, she knows she can't do that. She refuses to let herself get sucked back into that cycle.

However, as Azzi continues harmlessly flirting with Sam, she manages to catch Paige's gaze from across the bar. She watches as Paige takes in the sight of her and the Sam, eyes narrowing slightly, a challenge in them. Azzi feels a spark of defiance ignite in her chest. If Paige can flirt with other people, so can she.

Quickly, the conversation with Sam becomes a sort of competition. Azzi flirts more boldly, leaning closer, laughing louder, all while keeping an eye on Paige. Paige, in turn, seems to double down on her own flirting, making sure Azzi sees every touch, every smirk. It's maddening, and yet, it only fuels Azzi's resolve.

"Wanna get outta here?" Sam asks lowly, eyes trailing to the door. 

Azzi smirks and nods, letting him take her hand. As they make a beeline for the exit, Azzi feels a rush of triumph in her chest. She's won this twisted game, if only for a moment.

But before they can leave, Azzi feels a more familiar hand encircle her wrist, pulling her away from Sam. It's Paige, of course. Azzi wants nothing more than to scream at the blonde as she gives Sam a short, apologetic smile, saying, "I'm so sorry, I really need to talk to Azzi for a second."

Anyone that knows anything about UCONN basketball knows that Paige Bueckers and Azzi Fudd are a package deal, so Sam, looking a bit disappointed but understanding, nods and lets go of Azzi's hand. Azzi mutters protests to Paige as she's practically dragged to the bathroom by the older girl. 

Once inside, Azzi barely has time to process everything before Paige has her pushed against the wall, kissing her fiercely. The suddenness and intensity of it makes Azzi's head spin. Her body responds instinctively, hands reaching for Paige, gripping the skin of the blonde's waist. And then she remembers herself. Azzi's eyes fly open and she pushes Paige off, her anger flaring.

"Stop, Paige! What the fuck?" Azzi practically shouts, voice echoing in the small space.

Paige stares at her breathlessly, baby blue eyes looking foolishly innocent as they contort with confusion. "Why? We both want this."

Azzi shakes her head, trying to settle the fuzziness of the alcohol. "No, Paige, we can't. I can't."

"Why not?" Paige demands, stepping closer again. Azzi puts a hand on her bare stomach to stop her. It sends a jolt through her, and she's quick to remove it. 

As they stand there, face to face, Azzi can't help but let her mind wander to their last real conversation that wasn't just a murmur here and there on the court or on the bench. It was a few weeks ago, the morning after Paige had left the bar with that girl. It was early, Azzi still half-asleep as she felt her best friend crawl into her bed, maneuvering herself into Azzi's arms. Azzi had welcomed the embrace sleepily, before her mind traced back to the events of the night before. How lonely Azzi had been at the bar while Paige outright ignored her, how she'd gone home early feeling nothing short of miserable. And it only got worse when Azzi's eyes flew open to see Paige sporting a UCONN volleyball shirt, no doubt from the girl she'd fucked last night over Azzi. 

And then they'd fought. Azzi was uncharacteristically mean, words biting at Paige's every movement. She could tell Paige was confused, but when Azzi pointed out what she was wearing, everything seemed to click into place. Paige apologized, but it wasn't enough. It would never be enough, because—very clearly—Azzi wasn't enough for her. 

Azzi didn't tell her that, of course. Instead, she'd ended it. Just like that. 

And they haven't spoken since.

Until now. 

"Why not, Azzi?" Paige demands again, voice raising slightly as her breath fans against Azzi's face. 

Azzi takes a deep breath, feeling the weight of the alcohol and her words pressing hard against her chest. "Because I can't keep doing this, Paige! I can't keep pretending that it doesn't hurt every time I see you with someone else! I can't keep acting like it's okay to be your best friend who you casually fuck when I'm in love with you!"

Paige's eyes widens, but Azzi presses on, the words tumbling out of her in a rush. "Yes, I've been in love with you for years, Paige. And every time you're with someone else, it hurts. I thought I could handle it, but I can't. I thought that maybe, when I came here, things would change. That we'd stop seeing other people, that we could be together for real. But I was wrong. Clearly, I'm not enough for you. And it fucking kills me. I can't keep watching you with other girls and pretending it doesn't hurt. I can't keep pretending that I'm okay with just being your friend. Because I'm not. I want to be everything to you, and it hurts that I'm not. And it hurts even more that I know you don't want me to."

Paige stands there, speechless, her eyes wide with shock. As she stares, Azzi realizes exactly what she's done. She's just spilled all of her well-kept secrets and feelings, and it makes her feel sick. She is going to be sick. 

"You're in love with me?" Paige asks quietly, her voice barely above a whisper.

Before Azzi can answer, she feels the familiar bout of nausea rise up. She rushes into one of the stalls, puking into the toilet, all the drinks from the night spilling from her guts. Almost immediately, Paige is right behind her, holding her hair back, ever the best friend. 

When Azzi is done, there's a long, quiet moment. The reality of what she's just confessed hangs heavily in the air. She doesn't know whether to cry or scream or run away. Maybe all three. 

Maybe none.

"You need water, and some carbs, too," Paige murmurs softly, voice gentle as she swipes a hand through Azzi's hair in an attempt to comfort her. 

Azzi doesn't say a word, too drained and emotionally spent to respond. She lets Paige help her up, and together, they leave Ted's, Paige's steady hand on her back as they exit the bar. Azzi's body trembles with the aftereffects of alcohol and the intense outpouring of emotions. She wipes her mouth with the back of her hand, feeling utterly drained. Paige tries to guide her, but Azzi steps away, keeping her distance, needing space.

Azzi follows Paige's lead in the night air, walking alongside her. It's cool outside, helping to clear her head a little. They walk in silence, the only sounds the occasional car passing by and their footsteps on the pavement. Paige stays close, but Azzi can feel the tension between them, an invisible barrier that she can't bring herself to cross.

Eventually, they arrive at a small diner. The neon sign buzzes softly, casting a warm glow over the entrance. Paige holds the door open, and Azzi steps inside, the smell of greasy food and coffee hitting her immediately. It's oddly comforting.

They find a booth near the back, away from the few other patrons scattered around. Azzi slides into the seat, her body feeling heavy and sluggish. Paige sits across from her, and for a moment, they just look at each other, the weight of the night hanging between them.

When the waitress comes over, Paige orders for both of them, getting burgers and waters. Azzi doesn't have the energy to object. She just needs something to settle her stomach and clear her head.

As they wait, Azzi stares at the table, tracing patterns in the worn Formica surface. Her mind is a hurricane of thoughts and emotions, the confession she made to Paige replaying over and over again. She feels raw, exposed, and utterly vulnerable. She hates it. 

At one point, she glances up and catches Paige staring at her, her expression a mix of concern and something softer, something that makes Azzi's heart ache. Paige's lips part, and she murmurs, her voice barely audible, "Azzi—"

"Don't," Azzi interrupts firmly, her voice trembling slightly. "Please, just don't."

Paige's face falls, but she nods, looking down at her hands. The silence between them stretches out, heavy and oppressive. All Azzi knows is that she can't bear to hear whatever Paige has to say. She doesn't want to know if it's pity, regret, or something else. She isn't ready for any of it.

The waitress brings their food, and Azzi takes a bite of her burger, the familiar taste grounding her somewhat. She sips her water, feeling the cool liquid soothe her throat. Paige eats in silence as well, and Azzi occasionally catches her glancing up to watch her, though never saying a word. 

As they eat, Azzi's mind trails back to their time together, the stolen moments and secret kisses. She thinks about the mornings spent tangled in each other's arms, the way Paige's touch made her feel alive and cherished. But those moments were always fleeting, overshadowed by the reality of their situation. They were never truly together, just best friends who blurred the lines and hurt each other in the process.

Azzi's chest tightens as she reminds herself about all the girls Paige has been with, the countless nights spent in other beds. It hurts to think about, to know that she isn't enough for Paige, that she can't be the one to make her stay. The jealousy and pain are like a constant thorn in her side, a reminder of everything she wants but can't have.

She sneaks a glance at the blonde, who picks at her food, lost in thought. Azzi wonders if Paige feels the same, if there's any part of her that wants more, that feels the same ache and longing. She thinks there has to be. There have been too many moments that seem so domestic, so intimate that some corner of Paige's heart has to feel something other than friendship with Azzi. But she can't bring herself to ask. Not now, not when everything feels so raw, like a fresh wound.

The rest of the meal passes in silence, both of them lost in their own thoughts. When they finish, it's Paige that pays the bill. And then they leave the diner, stepping back into the cool night air. Azzi still keeps her distance, heart heavy.

When they reach Azzi's apartment, she fumbles with her keys, the silence stretching unbearably. She opens the door and steps inside, ready to close it behind her. But then Paige's small voice halts her movements and she pauses. 

"Azzi?"

Azzi turns, and she feels her heart clench at the sight of Paige, eyes filled with unshed tears. Azzi stands there, unable to speak, her breath catching in her throat.

Paige takes a hesitant step forward, her voice trembling. It's very un-Paige-like. "Can I say something? Please?"

Azzi nods, throat tight. She can't refuse Paige anything, not when she looks so vulnerable.

She watches as Paige takes a deep breath, before her words begin spilling out in a rush. "I'm so sorry, Azzi. For all the other girls, for everything. If I'd known how you felt, I never would have done any of it. I was scared. Scared of how strong my feelings are for you, scared of what it would mean for us. We're so young, and I didn't want to ruin our friendship and everything we have. And even if it didn't ruin things, I was scared that one day it would all fall apart. My parents divorced, my mom and dad both divorced from my step-parents... I don't know how to believe in something lasting."

Paige's voice breaks, and she wipes at her eyes. "But, Azzi, even though I'm scared, I want to try. If you still want to, I want to try. Because I'm in love with you, too. So fucking in love with you. And I have been since I met you at those basketball trials. You were so perfect and beautiful and it's like as soon as you told me your name, I knew I was a goner."

Azzi's breath hitches, and she feels wetness on her cheeks from tears she doesn't register shedding. Paige's words cut through her defenses, melting the walls she's built around her heart. This is Paige, her Paige, standing there with her heart in her hands.

Without thinking, Azzi reaches out, pulling Paige inside and kissing her hard. Paige responds immediately, her arms wrapping around Azzi's waist, pulling her closer. The kiss is fierce, desperate, and full of all the emotions they've kept bottled up for so long.

In between kisses, Paige murmurs against Azzi's lips, "I love you, I love you, I love you."

Azzi giggles and her heart feels like bursting. Finally.

V. APRIL 2022

Considering everything they’ve gone through after all this time, it’s a little odd that this is their first real date.

Paige can’t help but smile as she watches Azzi get ready in their hotel room. The sun filters through the curtains, casting a warm glow over Azzi’s face. It’s nice to have a moment together without all the stress of the past month. No basketball, no fans, no pressure—just them.

Paige has been planning this date for weeks, determined to make it perfect. She wants nothing more than to create a memory that’ll belong to just the two of them, something that’ll mark the beginning of their new chapter. Sure, it’s a little bittersweet that it came the day after losing the national championship, but maybe that’s fitting. Paige knows they can both use a little joy after the disappointment.

“Ready?” she asks, grabbing her keys and their jackets.

Azzi nods, excitement and curiosity shining in her eyes. “Definitely. What’s the plan?”

Paige grins, her heart pounding. “It’s a surprise, but I promise you’ll love it.”

They leave the hotel together, walking through the crisp air of Minneapolis. It’s a city that both of them are rather familiar with. However, Paige can tell as they continue walking that Azzi doesn’t know this particularly part that they’re in. It makes her glad; more of a surprise. 

Finally, they reach it. Paige stops walking, letting Azzi take in what they’re doing. They’re in front of a small, charming theater. The marquee reads: “Private Screening — Welcome, Paige and Azzi.”

“You rented out a theater?” Azzi asks, eyes widening in surprise. 

Paige nods, now a bit nervous that the moment is finally here. “Yeah. I thought it would be better to go somewhere where it could be just the two of us, no interruptions. No distractions.”

Azzi smiles, that smile that Paige will never be able to get enough of, and murmurs, “It’s perfect, P.” And then, she adds, as they enter the building, “What movie are we watching?”

Paige just shakes her head, letting that be a surprise, too. Besides, it shouldn’t be hard for Azzi to guess: they share the same favorite movie, after all. 

The staff greets the pair, leaving them to the theater they’re watching in. Paige anxiously watches Azzi’s face as they enter, wanting everything to be perfect. Inside, there’s blankets and snacks—and, on the screen, the opening credits of “Love & Basketball” begins to play. 

Azzi lets out a little laugh at that, muttering into the skin of Paige’s shoulder, “I should’ve known.” 

Paige grins down at the younger girl, glad she’s happy with what they’re doing. And, as they watch the movie that both of them can probably quote word-for-word, she continues stealing glances at the girl, her heart swelling with affection. Azzi looks completely at ease, her eyes glued to the screen, a soft smile playing on her lips. This movie had always been special to them, their favorite—and, after all, the first movie they ever watched together. 

As the movie continues, Paige’s thoughts drift. She lets herself think about the journey that had brought them here, the highs and lows, the moments of doubt and certainty. She thinks about the first time she realized she was in love with Azzi, the fear of ruining their friendship, the countless nights spent wondering what could be. She thinks about how she had been terrified at first, afraid of the intensity of her own feelings. But, eventually, she couldn’t deny the truth any longer. She was—she is—in love with Azzi, deeply and irrevocably. And, after Azzi had confessed her feelings that night in the bar, everything had changed.  

Paige reaches over, intertwining her fingers with Azzi’s. Azzi turns to her, eyes locking with Paige’s, nothing but deep, true love in them. Paige feels a rush of emotion at it, overwhelmed by the depth of her feelings. It’s nothing new; Azzi manages to make Paige feel like this every single day. 

“I love you,” Paige whispers, her voice barely audible over the movie’s dialogue.

Azzi’s eyes soften, and she leans in to kiss Paige gently. “I love you, too.”

Eventually, the movie ends and they leave the theater, going to get dinner. And, as the sky begins to darken and their date begins to end, Paige can’t help but think that she wants every first to be with Azzi, as well as every last. There’s no one else, and there will never be anyone else ever again. And, even if she’s getting ahead of herself, even if this is their first “real” date, Paige knows she wants to spend the rest of her life with Azzi. 

And she fucking plans to.

[kwamiwayzz]

While Jecka and Nicole would think that marriage sucks, they'd probably end up getting court married for the benefits. They've been together for awhile. And they do tolerate/care/love(?) each other enough after all the years of dealing with each other's bs.

So, they end up going to the courthouse on a random Wednesday, sign the papers, and everything is official. Great!

Now, Nicole can be under Jecka's health insurance and this also gives Jecka a sigh of relief that she can stay by Nicole's side in the hospital if she were to ever try to off herself again. Unfortunately, simply telling gross and sleazy men that they're married doesn't really keep them away. They don't see a ring, so in their minds, that means Jecka and Nicole aren't taken.

Okay, easy fix.

All Nicole needs to do is buy two rings from some shitty Claire's store on 5th Avenue or whatever to get these guys off their backs. But Jecka protests against it. Not because she's against the idea of wearing fake rings to ward off sleazy men, but because it's at fucking Claire's of all places. She reminds Nicole to have some decorum. They end up going to some random jeweler in the mall to get rings that could appear legit. Nicole just asks for a simple accent ring, while Jecka gets something that's more noticeable but not too gaudy.

They get the rings, and only wear them when they're out in public. When they're home, the ring comes off. Men will still try to pursue either one of them when they're just minding their own business, but it wards off a good chunk of them. As long as they see that ring, these men will assume that either Jecka or Nicole are taken by men. Because, hey! Who gives a fuck about what a woman's opinion?

Either way, it works for the most part. But over time, one of them starts to forget to take their fake wedding ring when they're back home. That little $30-50 accessory starts to mean just a bit more--even if neither party wants to admit it.

After some time, Jecka accidentally loses her's, and she's thinking, damn she has to deal with a higher percentage of men coming onto her again. It's actually perfect timing though, because Nicole had an actual diamond one ready to gift to Jecka.

Nicole says it's no big deal, and that it doesn't mean too much. But hey? The diamond ring will at least tell most other men trying to come onto her that they aren't shit if her "husband" can get her a nice looking ring that makes her look like a millionaire's wife.

Jecka thinks that Nicole stole it at the mall and decided to give it to her. Except she doesn't really give a shit if Nicole did. Because wow, next to getting the counselor away from her (so that Jecka could smoke by herself) in high school, this was probably the second nicest thing anyone has ever done for her.

Thing is, Nicole won't admit to Jecka that she went out of her way to save up enough money (from various odd jobs) to get that ring for her. Maybe she'll tell her. Maybe she won't.

[randxmthxughts]

Avatar Masterlist

JC Avatar Universe fanfiction - constantly updating (*- longer fics)

I write for Neteyam, Tsu'tey, Ao'nung, open to writing for Lo'ak, Jake

Neteyam:

*All For You - Neteyam x Ta’unui ! reader / enemies to lovers! - pt. 1 | pt. 2

when Quaritch attacks the Ta’unui water clan, Y/N flees to the Metkayina clan for safety. She develops feelings for Neteyam but the tensions grow when Y/N finds out that Neteyam is the son of Jake Sully - the man she hates.

*Be Mine - Neteyam x Metkayina ! reader / fake dating!

the one, where neteyam pretends to court the reader to avoid all of the nagging from his parents and a group of admirers. of course, it doesn’t take long for her to fall for him too

Human Stuff - Neteyam x Human ! reader (afab) / period cramps  

the one, where a confused na’vi teenager tries to comfort his human friend while she’s on her period

Your lips, my lips, apocalypse - Neteyam x Omatikaya ! reader

when y/n hangs out with the women at the lab and decides to put on lipstick to feel pretty, her friends start to make fun of her. but not neteyam, he thinks she looks cute

*And I cried when you first said, "Oel ngati kameie" - Neteyam x Metkayina ! reader / forbidden love!

despite her father’s wariness of the sully’s and their ‘demon-blood,’ y/n can’t help but feel drawn to neteyam. as the two of them bond over their similar experiences of parental pressure, he finds himself falling in love with her

*Second Chances - Neteyam x Omatikaya ! reader / love triangle!

y/n and lo'ak were destined to be together, or so she thought... after moving to awa'atlu with the sully's, lo'ak starts to fall for a certain metkayina girl, leaving y/n completely heartbroken. it is unexpected when neteyam, who has been secretly harboring feelings for her, decides to tend to her wounds. can y/n reciprocate his love?

Nerves Talking - Neteyam x Crybaby ! reader / misscommunication

after spending months teaching his little sister’s friend how to hunt, neteyam is surprised by the lack of her progress. later on, he discovers then that she is just too nervous to be around him because of her not-so-small crush

Tunutu (Crush) - Neteyam x Omatikaya ! reader / childhood friends to lovers

although neteyam had never reciprocated her feelings, choosing him was always an easy decision for y/n, one of those she could make in a heartbeat. so when another man tries to win her affections, neteyam suddenly becomes aware of what he has been missing out on

*Chosen by Eywa - Neteyam x Omatikaya ! reader / series (complete)

eywa makes no mistakes... in the midst of his preparation to become the future olo'eyktan, neteyam is told to be with a chosen mate. guided by the signs of eywa, tsahik picks y/n, a woman orphaned by the war, whose heart already belongs to another. y/n's whole world begins to crumble, as she is forced into the loveless bond. will neteyam and y/n be able to overcome the odds and find their true happiness?

Tsu'tey:

Child of Our Own - Tsu'tey x Omatikaya ! reader

seeing his friends already awaiting their firstborns, tsu'tey begins to yearn for a baby of his own, but he is too shy to tell you about it

Unrequited Love - Tsu’tey x Omatikaya ! reader / smut

you had been in love with tsu'tey for as long as you could remember. so when you see his heart break again at the loss of another mate, you offer him comfort, expecting nothing in return

Unrequited - Tsu’tey x Omatikaya ! reader / series (complete)

based on Unrequited Love: y/n had been in love with tsu'tey since they were kids, watching him get his heart broken over and over, until he became hardened. on one particular night, she offers him intimacy with no expectations in return, which sparks up a complex relationship between them. they grapple with guilt, unrequited love, and newfound intimacy, as y/n and tsu'tey navigate the depths of their feelings for each other

Captain Save a Hoe - Tsu'tey x Avatar ! reader

grumpy tsu’tey having to take care of a clumsy avatar!reader, and eventually warming up to her

Let Me Hear My Child - Tsu'tey x Pregnant ! reader / headcanons

tsu'tey's reaction to finding out his mate is pregnant

You'll be a great dad - Tsu'tey x Pregnant ! reader / Tsu'tey x Jake

tsu'tey is overwhelmed with anxiety and fear upon hearing the news of his mate's pregnancy and becoming a father, but like a good friend, jake is there to calm him down

Can't wait to meet you - Tsu'tey x Pregnant ! reader

pregnant!reader having to reassure tsu'tey that he will be a great father, despite his fears

Just Married - Tsu'tey x Female ! mate

when you stepped into the public eye for the first time after your mating, tsu'tey couldn't contain the overflowing affection he held for you. but because you felt insecure about the way you were being perceived by the clan, tsu'tey decided to prove you otherwise

Ao'nung:

Heaven in Hiding - Ao'nung x Metkayina ! reader / secret dating!

ao'nung and you have been hiding your relationship for some time now but there comes a moment when you want more than that

Thinking out loud about avatar (my opinions/analyses/theories):

sully kids watching jake's old diary logs

neteyam taking the move to awa'atlu the best out of the sully's

jake cringing at "my husband was toruk makto" bc of his own insecurities

jake and quaritch making up

-- let me know, if you want to be added to my taglist ♡ 

[cupidcures]

When Tulips Kiss | Hwang Hyunjin SMAU

CHAPTERS: 𝜗𝜚 THIRTY-FIVE | THIRTY-SIX | 𝜗𝜚 THIRTY-SEVEN

WORD COUNT: 2.2k (not proofread)

better off

“Will you move over?” Beomgyu vocalized his agitation towards the young man in front of him, but he still didn’t budge from the spot.

The last thing either of them expected was to see one another here at Jisung’s place, yet here they both were, standing face to face.

“I’ll give her the flowers, thanks. What are you doing here, anyway?” Hyunjin grumbled and eyed him up and down in a somewhat indifferent way.

“No thanks man, I’d rather do it myself. Mind calling her down for me? I don’t wanna waste my time here talking to you when I could be with Y/N.” Beomgyu smiled fakely and tilted his head to look past his shoulder, making eye contact with Jeongin.

“Yo Jeongin!” He waved, “Mind getting this dude out of the way for me?”

Jeongin glanced between the two boys, deadpanning at their immature bickering.

‘There’s no way these two guys are grown…’ he thought to himself before shaking his head and exchanging a glance with Jisung, who was sitting across the couch opposite of him.

“You wanna go get your wife?” Jeongin joked as Jisung crackled in amusement before nodding his head.

“On it. Go take care of whatever is happening over there.” He pointed his lips toward the front door where Hyunjin and Beomgyu stood before making his way upstairs to grab you.

“Yo baby, I’m coming in, alright?” Jisung knocked on the door of his bedroom—where you were currently staying—before turning the knob and opening the door.

You were tucked inside the comforter of his bed, scrolling through your phone without a care in the world. You tore your gaze away from your phone and directed it to the quokka boy standing by the door.

“Sungie?” You mumbled and he grinned.

“Hey, wifey! The dude that’s courting you is downstairs to take you out. You should hurry, though. He and Hyunjin might kill each other with their glares.” Jisung approached you with light footsteps as you hooked your arm around his with a nod.

“Shall we?” You giggled and so did Jisung. “We shall!!!!!”

The two of you enthusiastically skipped out of the room and down the stairs, greeting the three boys (hehe Omar Apollo ref) downstairs with a princess wave. “Hey Jeongin! Beomgyu, Hyunjin!”

The arguing pair immediately stopped at the sound of your voice as they both turned their attentions to you, mesmerized and smitten.

“Y/N! Hey.” Hyunjin blushed and stood in front of Beomgyu, blocking your view of him.

“Hi Y/N. You look pretty.” Beomgyu pushed past Hyunjin and gave him a petty glare, which he returned with no hesitation. “I brought you some roses!”

White roses. Easy to spot due to their brightness and the way the light of the sun would easily reflect off of them. White roses symbolize purity and innocence. Beyond this, white roses are used in funerals because it is also a way to bid someone farewell. Being brought white roses was certainly new to you, but you appreciated the gesture nonetheless. It’s not like he knew and studied the flowers’ languages like you did.

Taking the flowers off of Beomgyu’s hand and bringing them to your chest, you thanked him graciously, “Thank you Gyu!”

He rubbed his sweaty palms on his shirt. “Of.. of course! Can I take you out?”

“Ooh actually… we’re all hanging out here you know… It’s a shame! Come back some other day.” Hyunjin responded for you, eye twitching in irritation.

The three other people in the room were caught off guard by his statement, and it bestowed an awkward silence in the tense atmosphere.

“Uh… yeah! Sorry Gyu, maybe next time?” You were confused, to say the least, it’s not like Hyunjin made plans SPECIFICALLY for everyone to hang out, the only plans that were made were between him and Jisung. But you still decided to hide his little lie nonetheless. You could always just ask him about it later, but you had a feeling you already knew what it was about.

“Oh. Okay, I see. Well, you guys have fun then!” Beomgyu offered a weak smile sided with a look of disappointment plastered on his delicate facial features.

“Actually! You could always just hang out with us, none of us have a problem with an extra person! Right, guys?” Jeongin spoke up before Beomgyu had the chance to leave, and his eyes lit up.

“Can I?” He asked for confirmation from everyone else. And by everyone else, he looked to you and Jisung, ignoring the look of disbelief on Hyunjin’s face.

“Uhh…” Jisung’s lips pressed together awkwardly, forming a thin line, inspecting everyone’s faces before hesitating, “I mean I guess it’s alright?”

“Great! It’s settled then, go ahead and sit down, Hyunjin was just about to put on a movie.” Jeongin grinned mischievously and ushered Beomgyu further into the house before closing the front door, making sure to lock it.

“Thanks for letting me stay over,” Beomgyu thanked enthusiastically and wrapped his arm around your shoulder, causing you to blush a little.

Hyunjin scoffed at the action and rolled his eyes, walking himself to the far end of the couch and picking up the remote to choose a movie to watch.

Jisung followed close behind and took a seat next to him, patting his back. Jeongin sat down on the other, smaller couch and reached for a blanket.

“What kind of movie are we feeling?” Hyunjin asked.

“Romance!” Beomgyu suggested as he sat down on the opposite side of the same couch Hyunjin and Jisung sat at, bringing you along beside him.

“Horror it is.” He decided with a monotone voice, resulting in Jisung choking back a laugh at his antics.

God, he was so petty. But it was humorous, who could get mad at that?

The movie started a little after Jisung turned the lights off to properly adjust the environment accordingly to the movie.

You were cuddled up against Beomgyu, more for warmth than anything. You couldn’t deny the attraction you had for the boy that pulled you in. You found yourself spacing out, deep in thought. This was something that occurred frequently whenever you were with Beomgyu. He made you dreamy and you would often drift away to your thoughts. He brought peace and serenity to you, so you were naturally much more comfortable around him. With his arms wrapped tightly around your waist and his head resting on top of yours, it felt like second nature.

All of the tension directed towards each other had died down, and it instead projected onto the movie. The jumpscares evoked jolts and screams now and then, often followed by the sound of laughter due to the high-pitched shrieks that would fill the air for a moment or two.

Everyone let loose and focused on the movie. Everyone but Hyunjin.

He did his best to enjoy the movie much like everyone else, but he would constantly find himself sparing glimpses into your direction.

He noticed the way you were snug against Beomgyu, and there was nothing he could do but stare and wish it was him you were with instead. He knew it sent pangs to his chest whenever you played with Beomgyu’s hair and held his hand, but still, he struggled with tearing his gaze off of you, and you never seemed to notice. You looked happy, comfortable. You were content, and maybe it would just be better off for everybody if he were to just back off and leave you be.

He was being immature, trying to keep the two of you apart—when it was clear that you and Beomgyu had something, even if it was only a little.

Hyunjin quietly dismissed himself to the kitchen to grab a drink of water with ice, his throat had gone dry as a consequence of watching the PDA you shared with Beomgyu.

“You good bro?” A hushed voice broke the silence in the kitchen as Hyunjin turned around to face whoever it was, the sound effects of the movie playing in the distance.

“Dry throat.” He responded as Jisung nodded slowly and skeptically.

“Uhuh… And you think I’m stupid enough to believe that? Don’t think I didn’t notice your little attempts at trying to inconvenience that dude she’s with. Beomgyu, is it?”

The two boys chuckled lightly. Hyunjin didn’t expect anyone to follow him, but he was glad that Jisung was there to prove him wrong and lighten the mood.

“You still in love with Y/N?” He pulled a bar chair from under the island and sat down, leaning himself on the table.

“Unfortunately.”

“Woah, unfortunately? It’s a privilege to love Y/N, buddy,” Jisung joked but cleared his throat right after noticing that he didn’t laugh along.

“Not when she doesn’t love you back,” Hyunjin took a sip out of his glass. “It’s hard. Unrequited love is hard.”

The faint buzzing and the bright light above stimulated his senses more than they should, inducing a headache.

“I was gonna try to win her back, not gonna lie,” he chuckled. “But who am I to do that?”

“What do you mean? Why give up?” Jisung pursed his lips and scrunched his face, confused.

“I lost her the first time because I was scared that someone was gonna take her away,” Hyunjin circled his glass around on the kitchen counter, creating a small vortex in an attempt to rush the ice’s process of making the water cold, just how he liked it. “I may not like Beomgyu—but to instill the same fear that I struggled with—in him, that’d be real fucking shitty, don’t you think? Now, I’m not saying he’s not secure in himself and in whatever they have going on, I’m almost sure he’s better than me when it comes to that. But just thinking of attempting to steal her away, when I know exactly how it feels to be scared of that happening, it doesn’t feel good. Makes me feel like shit.” Hyunjin inhaled deeply, watching as the ice cubes struggled to keep afloat with the miniature whirlpool dragging them down.

“Everything I’ve done for her, relating to her, it was all to do what’s best for me…” He trailed off and halted the movement of his hands, the whirlpool slowly dissipating. “I’ve been selfish and it has done nothing but drown me and add to my struggles.”

The ice cubes in the glass were finally resting on top of the surface, the water now still and calm, lacking disturbance.

“I love her. But I don't want to be selfish, not anymore. I want what’s best for her, even if it isn’t me. I need to learn to stop meddling with things just because I’m not satisfied with how it’s going. If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen. But I’m backing away, and I’ll do my best to move on.”

The outside of the glass was now moisturized with small droplets due to the coldness of the water meeting with the warmth of the air.

“I didn’t know that was how you felt.” Jisung grimaced at the thought of how he used to hate him for what he had done to you, when in reality, it probably affected him more. “I understand, honestly. I know what it feels like to have your fears and insecurities get the best of you. I think it’s really mature that you’re deciding to do this when you’re still in love with her.” Jisung got up from the stool and walked over to Hyunjin to pat his back.

“It’s good that you acknowledged your wrongs. Wanting to do better is already one step ahead, you’re already improving. I know we’re not close dude, but damn… am I proud of you. I would love to get closer. I appreciate all your efforts in trying to do what’s best for Y/N, it seriously warms my heart.” Jisung playfully placed his hand on his chest where his heart would be with a soft expression on his face—the two boys burst out in laughter after that.

“I love Y/N, platonically of course. And seeing how much you love her now? I was wrong about you,” Jisung hummed. “I’ll be right here for support! I have your back.”

He gave Hyunjin a thumbs-up, who then returned it with a smile.

“It’s gonna be hard to move on from her. THAT, I know. Especially since we’re still gonna be friends? Fuck, bro. I might just be setting myself up for failure.” Hyunjin laughed before bringing the glass of water to his lips and drinking it all, the cold water bringing a shiver down his spine. “But it’ll happen eventually. That way, everyone is happy. I should just leave it be. As long as she’s happy, no matter who she’s with, I’ll be happy too. It’s better off like this. And she’s better off with him.”

“That’s the spirit! Now come on, let’s go back to watch the movie.” Jisung placed his hand on the back of Hyunjin’s and pushed him towards the living room where the three others were.

a/n: THIS IS SO SHORT I’M SORRY LOL

𝜗𝜚 WTK series masterlist

TAGLIST (OPEN)! @jeonginplsholdmyhand @jeonginsgirl @mlrroh @mafiulaputaama @seungzsmin @hannie-bees @skz1lov @porang-poranglinos @sillyhal @mitchii @soulphoenix1618 @gnab-nahc @hyunjins-dimples @nappynapnaps @15092000volcano @livixcore @linocvp1d @yaorzu-blog @scallywag1299 @boo-ven9eance @lys4lix @kirbrary @4ln-stay8 @sellomaybe @aznstoner @saintcosette @starseungs @syedazarintasnim @elqivxstxr @ivydoesit23 @weirdowithaphone @hyuneee3 @nhyunn @velvetmoonlght @amarecerasus @skzstan12345 @ravengxbss @sweetbokji @wondering-out-loud @girlblogger-04 @soaplickerrr @oddracha @realrintaro @hyukazwifey @manuosorioh @qu4ckqu4ck

[vlrspace]

possessive, midoriya x reader

wc: 1.6K

part two, part three

there are three times where midoriya showed you his possessive, jealous and territorial side, they live in your mind rent free.

not that he wouldn’t touch you or anything, but these three times were ones you haven’t expected of the shy boy, who became tall, sturdy and broad over the years. midoriya hesitated to take your hand or give you a kiss on many occasions, fearing of making you uncomfortable or hurting you. it was never the case when you felt his fingers brush against your skin, his touches were always tender, but he remained a gentleman even now, half a year into the relationship.

sure, midoriya can become bold and confident, like throwing an arm around your shoulder around school, kissing you in empty hallways and sneaking into your room after curfew. these were already hot and daring from midoriya, so the first time it happened, your gentle and timid boyfriend showed everyone his possessive side, you were beyond stunned.

a trip to the mall became a monthly event for your class, someone was always running out of something, needing new clothes or had to buy the latest video game. which is why you all agreed to split up because they would surely kick you out of the mall if twenty people just stepped into an already crowded shop. the girls dragged you away from midoriya’s side, who at first didn’t understand why your hand has been ripped from his, but when you gave him a reassuring smile and a wave, he seemed to visibly relax.

it was a tiring process of trying on many different types of clothes and accessories. your friends lost you at one of the drug stores mentally because your brain just couldn’t handle the many different things anymore so when jiro looked at you with the same interest in her eyes, you two agreed that this is how kaminari must feel when he’s jammed.

you two ended up standing outside at the last shop, keeping in contact with the boys, so you can all go and grab lunch together. midoriya asked if you wanted him to meet you before lunch but you kindly declined, not wanting to upset your friends for ruining your girls time. it was surprising that even though, you spent more than 15 minutes waiting for them to exit the shop, that you arrived to the food court first. you and momo decided to stay back at your table while the girls went ahead to buy their lunch.

the conversation between you and momo went flawlessly, you felt perfectly content and comfortable as the two of you stood opposite of each other. however, the pleasant atmosphere disappeared when a boy, around your age or a bit older, slid in between you and momo, interrupting your conversation to start a new one with you.

“oh my, an angel sent from heaven. are you free later honey?” his voice was sickly sweet and the amount of cologne reeked off him so much that you had to stop yourself from gagging.

“leave me alone” you mumbled, trying to move away from him, even if he was shorter and less toned than your boyfriend, you still felt uncomfortable and anxious about the whole situation already.

“awh sweetheart, no need to play hard to get” he smirked, taking a step closer to you before leaning closer to your face “i’d treat you real nice, i promise” his tone sounded so fake, you started to feel sick as he grabbed your arm. you hadn’t had the chance to respond as you took a step back to put some space between you two, trying to free yourself from his grip, your back hitting a hard chest, a familiar hand wrapping itself over your waist.

unbeknownst to you, midoriya entered the food court with the boys the second this guy walked up to you. now midoriya doesn’t blame him, you’re a beautiful woman, he’s mesmerised every time he looks at you and he isn’t surprised that you catch the eyes of many. unfortunately to everyone else, you belong to him and him only.

midoriya started to walk towards you before the others could hold him back, aware of the destruction one for all could do when the green haired male is angry. since the boy in front of you hid momo behind him, you haven’t seen the way her eyes flickered behind you two, wide and shocked to see midoriya’s expression. your friends are used to midoriya’s timidity around you, you’re often louder and more confident while he follows you around like a huge lovesick puppy. it’s usually very funny how his larger frame, strong and muscular, becomes mushy when you’re around.

so this was new to everyone, the way his usual bright eyes were dark and sharp, jaw tight as his face was focused on the scumbag in front of him, standing at 6”3, muscles all tense, midoriya truly looked terrifying.

“she’s already taken” midoriya’s voice comes out deep, grumbling at the boy in front of you two, his arm tightly holding you close to him. if the situation was different, you know you would throw yourself at him, because damn, this side of him was so hot.

it’s funny to see the way the boy’s face in front of you changed within seconds. at first, you can tell that he wanted to come up with something to make himself look better, but as he took in the face above him, he seemed to realise that he’s no match for midoriya. it was hard to not recognise the future symbol of peace for anyone nowadays, but this asshole was 5 foot something, and stood nothing against those muscles midoriya gained over the years.

“i’m sorry” the boy stammered, looking quite embarrassed and avoided midoriya’s gaze, who seemed to press you more against him, so unless he spun you around to face him, you’re stuck like this. “i uh-i didn’t know” his words came out swiftly and tone very shaky, he finally lets go of your arm and you let it fall beside you, not daring to move.

todoroki comes up to stand next momo, kirishima and iida following behind, standing next to midoriya to make sure no punches are thrown. fortunately, nothing happens as midoriya sends a glare towards the boy, before moving you by the waist and starts leading you away from the table.

“are you okay? he didn’t hurt you, right?” midoriya’s voice is slightly strained from the sudden anger he felt from a few minutes ago, his hand stroking your waist and your side and presses his lips against the crown of your head.

“no, no i’m okay. you arrived just at the right time” you quietly said, a little bit shaken up from the events and shocked by midoriya’s behaviour.

“let’s get something to eat, yeah? what would you like? it’s my treat baby” your boyfriends cheery mood is starting to come back, even if his hold on you is still a little tight. you don’t see a point in arguing with him over about the payment of your lunch because you know that he won’t let you pay either way.

when the two of you return back to the table, everyone is already eating, so they are making space for the two of and you both join in. momo asks you right away if you’re okay and apologises to you for not being able to do anything.

“don’t worry momo! “you reassure her with a warm smile as you continue on eating your sushi.

“still, i feel bad! i should’ve said something” her voice sounded light as her eyes began to tear up. bless her, you think, she’s so kind hearted, so you stand up from your chair and hug her from behind, your face smushed with hers and she lets out an airy giggle and puts a hand on your arms for comfort.

“oh my god, let me take a picture! you two are so cute!!!” mina practically screams out loud, causing everyone to laugh around you. momo and you smile for the picture and you know it turned out rather cute.

you walk back to your seat next to midoriya, who now fully calmed down and grins at you as you sit down “besides, mr. number one here saved the day again” you add jokingly, leaning against midoriya’s chest as he puts an arm around your shoulders. “never knew you could be so possessive izu” you whisper to him and his cheeks flush red, causing you to giggle.

“can we talk about how scary izuku looked, like i’ve never seen him so terrifying before unless he’s in a fight” kaminari says with sero and mineta nodding next to him, discussing how they never want to make midoriya mad again because they nearly shitted themselves.

“like sure, katsuki can be very intimidating, but holy shit dude, that was another level” kirishima adds, looking at midoriya with a toothy grin to make sure he doesn’t take it as an offence, which midoriya actually takes as a praise (in his mind).

“i don’t like it when someone hurts people i care about” the green haired man replies with a small smile, gently squeezing your shoulder and you smile to yourself from how safe you feel in his arms. “and no one messes with what’s mine” the last bit came out quite quietly, only heard by you as he tucked his face in your hair, and it was your turn to sit with a flushed face, making midoriya smirk.

the rest of the day went by, midoriya didn’t let you out of his sight and held your hand the whole way around.

oh lord, if only you knew this was just the mild level of midoriya’s boldness.

[caramelpenguin]

"What do I need to do again?" Simon’s voice is low, careful.

Wilhelm gulps. "Just, like, be yourself. How you were. Around me." Saying it feels like digging his own grave. His stomach is tight, his breath shallow, as if the air is too thick to pull in. Everything around him—the polished marble floors, the grand chandeliers, the echoes of distant voices—is too pristine, too suffocating.

He glances at Simon, his hand brushing against Wilhelm’s for just a moment before retreating. The brief touch stings like a burn.

Two months. They haven't seen each other in two months. Not since it was decided that perhaps this relationship wouldn't work out, that their love wouldn't be able to weather the storm of the Royal Court, of the whirlwind that Wilhelm has been brought up in. He convinced himself that it was the right thing to do. He'd rather remember Simon and his happiest moments with soft glow. Not a harsh ending where it would inevitably culminate in a fiery eruption.

It seemed to be an invisible agreement that neither would manage being 'friends'. Maybe one day, but not yet. Not when everything was a bit too raw. The past two months were like concrete hardening in his chest, only reminding him of how deeply he had loved and how devastatingly he had been loved in return.

"Take a deep breath, yeah?" Simon turns so that he's facing Wilhelm directly, blocking them from the rest of the empty sterile corridor. "In and out with me, Wille."

Wilhelm’s breath stutters, but he tries. He inhales shakily, and then exhales, eyes darting up to meet Simon’s. His curls are the same, his gaze just as warm, just as deep. Wilhelm’s heart is an old wound tearing open. He wonders why they let it end, why they broke up. He asks himself why he lost the battle, why his sword couldn't be sharper and his shield steadier.

Two months ago, he had promised himself that this was the right choice. A break-up included not initiating unnecessary contact, it meant burying their love, locking it in a box that only he would open in private. Wilhelm didn't tell his family about the break-up. He couldn't. Because he knew his mother would only say she saw this coming. She'd raise her nose and her chin would be sharp and she'd speak as if she held all the secrets to the universe - 'people like Simon aren't right for you, Wilhelm."

That’s why Simon is here now, standing in this empty corridor before they step into the lion’s den. Wilhelm invited him to this royal event to prove her wrong—to prove to her that their love wasn’t some fleeting, silly thing. Even if it’s all fake now. Even if this is the last shred of Simon he’ll ever hold onto.

"We don't have to, you know." Simon shuffles even closer. His fingers brush Wilhelm’s again, and this time they linger. Wilhelm wants to kiss him. He aches. He wants to go back in time and rewrite history. "We don't have to show our faces."

"She'll only use that against me later." Wilhelm replies, voice tight. His hand clenches in Simon’s, and he forces himself to loosen it. He can’t seem too desperate, even if he feels like he’s drowning.

"Alright then," he says. Simon’s eyes are so dark, so familiar. He’s seen those eyes full of love, fury, joy—he’s seen everything Simon has to give. All Wilhelm feels is the unbearable weight of what he’s lost. "If you're comfortable."

I'm always comfortable with you, Wilhelm almost says. Simon's presence unravels him, makes him weak, makes him smile in that unguarded way where his teeth show. He can't imagine anybody else by his side.

[turnmyheadupsidedown]

Young royals faves fest

This year I’ve been tracking my reading and I have some favorites from the 499 fics I’ve read. So why not share them now during @youngroyals-events faves fest?

There are an insane amount of amazing yr fics on ao3 and this is only some of my favorites from what I’ve read this year (sadly didn’t track last year..)

one hundred and seventeen

by thatgayprince (@prince-simon) E 15k

Wille celebrates his birthday in Vegas, courtesy of Maddie, where he runs into Lady Gaga's background dancer

Let’s start with a classic (for me). This one has a special place in my heart. I think this was one of my first fics that included some kind of gender/trans/non binary/fluid and I was so reluctant to read it because of that and now I love it.

Constellations of Love

by Spidaya (@simons-purplehoodie) M 80k

An enemies to lovers & fake dating story, with focuses on Simon’s struggle to keep his family afloat despite his father’s abuse and addiction, and Wille’s trauma and anxiety from childhood to adulthood, heavily based on the book “They Hate Each Other” by Amanda Woody

This is for those of you who want to feel when you read. I cried multiple times both times I read it this year.

forever i'm yours

by goldenwilmon (@goldenwilmon) E 22k

Simon takes a chance when he sees Wilhelm from afar at a party on a January night, sparking an instant connection between them. They spend a year falling in love.

You wanna have some good feelings? This is for you! According to my notes it’s “so fucking cute and lovely”

Little Light

by unfortunate17 (@unfortunate17) E 22k

Wilhelm never returned to Hillerska after winter break. Ten years later, Simon watches him come out on national television. Then, they reconnect.

Simon is not okay. It will hurt and you need to take care of yourself while reading this.

Is It Over Now?

by itsme_hi_imtheproblem (@iwouldnevergetintofanfic) E 75k

It's clear from the start that Crown Prince Wilhelm and Simon Eriksson, member of world-famous boyband sensation HIGH 5, don't have a future. Against all odds and under scrutiny from media, management and the royal court, they still try - and fail to preserve their fragile relationship.

It's over.

Until Simon decides to release three songs, ten years later. Three songs about Wilhelm. Times have surely changed, but so have they. Both of them struggle with the strong emotions that reappear. Are they just memories? Or are things not quite as over as they thought?

Buckle up, because this will be an intense ride! The angst level is high but it is worth it, so worth it!

In Another Life

by embracedthevoid (@embracedthevoid) E 100k

Wilhelm and Simon stumble back into each other's lives and decide to give themselves one last night together.... or so they thought it would be their last night.

Wilhelm never returned to Hillerska after winter break, and he has spent his entire life regretting it. Nearly a decade later, he runs into Simon. He had hoped he'd successfully moved on from his feelings after all these years, but clearly, he was wrong. The two spend a passionate night together, expecting it to be their last. That is until it happens a second time when the two come arrangement that suits both their needs. Friends with benefits? No, they'd have to actually be friends for that to be the case.

Complicated feelings and really good smut? Yes please!

Fools in a Fable

unfortunate17 (@unfortunate17) E 39k

Simon, a journalist at a left-wing magazine, eagerly accepts the chance of a lifetime to write a scathingly honest piece about the newly crowned King Wilhelm, who has a history shrouded in parties, drugs, and gay allegations. His plans, however, go to shit when he realizes that Wilhelm is nothing like he expected.

You wanna read almost 40k with the constant feeling of “shit will hit the fan really fucking soon”? This is for you!

The bro-tap

itsme_hi_imtheproblem (@iwouldnevergetintofanfic) M 5k

What if Wille bro-tapped Simon a little too hard after rowing practice in S1E2?

We will end this list with a short one shot which is both funny and very beautiful. I’d say this is my favorite first time-fic.

[cozzzynook]

Drift and Ratchet wanting to make Hot Rod their Conjunx. However they see Rodimus one day in the lab with Perceptor and those two seem really close. They think something is going on between them and try to impress Rodimus. Later they find out Perceptor is actually Rodimus carrier and everyone on the Lost Light is shocked because they weren't expecting that.

Rodimus is caught sitting in Perceptors lap a couple times by bots too afraid to say anything due to Perceptors vicious blank glare.

Brainstorm had figured it out pretty quickly and teased Perceptor endlessly on why he didn’t tell him he was going to be a sire when they finally conjunx.

Perceptor of course grips a digit on Brainstorms servo and bends it hard until the bot shut ups with apologies.

Rodimus has not an ounce of danger sense when Perceptor is with him. Unless the threat is aimed towards perceptor then he’ll resort back to being the wreckers “flame streak” and there will be hell to pay.

Rodimus often goes to Perceptors lab and the scientist can often be seen going to Rodimus’s hab and vice versa. Bots were again too afraid to say anything if they happened to notice and many thought when Perceptor would present a cup of energon to Rodimus dermas that smelled good after the captain went so long without any he was making sure their captain didn’t offline from his own lack of self care.

Rodimus would curl up in Perceptors lap like used to as a sparkling to make his carrier take a break and fuel. Often so he would recharge as well. Brainstorm had so many pictures of them together. The mech claimed it was blackmail but it was obvious the jet was feeling paternal pride much to Perceptors blushing embarrassment and Rodimus’s teasings.

It was a normal week when Drift and Ratchet had finally decided to try courting Rodimus only to find him talking to Perceptor who was in the wash racks under the streams with Rodimus talking to him completely unfazed about Perceptor being naked on the other side.

The two were completely shocked and ran off before the two could notice them. Well Perceptor did but he didn’t care since they couldn’t see him and hadn’t gotten too close for comfort so he let it be.

Until he noticed the two coming around his bitlet more often and paid more attention than usual. He made a point to keep optic contact when the two would invade their carrier sparkling plus Brainstorm time with their pitiful attempts at trying to steal Rodimus’s attention.

According to Brainstorm who took it upon himself to surveil the three they were attempting to court his precious bitty.

He wasn’t sure how to feel about that but he supposed it was far better than the last mech who hurt his sparkling bitty.

The mech was never seen again and Perceptor did well changing the subject when Rodimus would occasionally ask about the mech. Brainstorm again was too smart for his own good and figured out the “fake” talking helm on Kup’s mantel back on cybertron was real. No Perceptor did not find Brainstorm offering to conduct vile experiments on the mechs processor to make them feel even more pain while remaining online was sweet in a twisted way. Nor did he let the jet begin conjunx ritus when he promised not to take time away from his bitty or let any bot hurt either of them.

Perceptor was simply allowing the mech to do what he pleased and what he pleased was taking Perceptor and Rodimus to the top of the ship to see a meteor shower Perceptor refused to let Rodimus ride.

Drift and Ratchet of course took this as Perceptor and Brainstorm trying to court Rodimus and they decided to up their attempts one hundred percent because they would not give up on having Rodimus as they didn’t give up on having each other.

So they set out to ask Magnus and Megatron to land on a nearby planet known for its romantic sea life scenery and when they tell them why the two can’t help agreeing because they’d like some romantic time alone as well. Not to mention most of the crew who were mated and conjunx as well.

So they land on the planet after telling Rodimus half the reason why and he agrees going off saying he’d tell Perceptor and Brainstorm and the two along with Cyclonus, Whirl and Tailgate shaking their helms saying poor Drift and Ratchet.

The two hear about this and it only fuels them more to win Rodimus over.

When they get to the sea it’s beautiful.

Ratchet goes to ask Rodimus if he’d like to surf with Drift and that he himself was going to relax on a float when he sees Perceptor rubbing Rodimus’s helm affectionately before laying down to have Brainstorm rub sun wax on his frame.

Drift comes bonding over and grabs Rodimus who looks shocked and happy to see them both when Drift notices Ratchet faltering.

Rodimus happily agrees to go with them and he enjoys surfing with Drift who tries to show off his skills only to almost wipe out in the waves and Rodimus has to grab him. They both almost go under but Drift is a pretty good swimmer and gets them both above water to Ratchet who scolds them both while checking them over.

The fun does continue though.

Ratchet and Drift invite him to dinner and learn Rodimus is a really good cook. He makes the best energon steak for Ratchet and the most delicious sea pasta scallops for Drift. When they ask him why he hadn’t made anything for himself he tells them he was saving all his room for Percptors famous energon wrap.

The two were so disappointed and hurt to hear that but they held out hope because Rodimus was here cooking for them and looking so happy with his spoiler fluttering at their hums of approval and asking for another meal in the morning when they woke from recharge. But only if Rodimus was willing to spend the night of course.

Rodimus blushed so hard he forgot how to speak, he simply nodded his helm and stayed up late to watch telescreens with the two on a large comfortable couch under a blanket.

He was so happy to recharge in the middle he smiled brightly at the two the moment he woke before them. He was surprised he woke up before Ratchet and even more surprised he didn’t wake Drift when he moved and put the blanket back on the two of them.

He went to make them breakfast and found himself swaying his hips to a song he was humming. The smell of energon woke the two and they immediately went to the kitchen and were in awe at Rodimus cooking looking so delicious and the gorgeous aft swinging looking so delectable with the voice of a siren luring them to their fate.

Maaayybeee the two were looking like idiots as Rodimus fed them breakfast before his own tanks rumbled and he remembered he hadn’t fueled yet.

They felt so dumb forgetting to fuel the one they were planning to conjunx and felt they deserved the blow to the spark at Rodimus saying he would love to meet them in the heat pools later after grabbing food from Perceptor.

They decided at the heat pools to gift Rodimus with a massage to prove they can care for his needs while also making him feel pleasure.

It was Ratchet who wrapped an arm around Rodimus then Drift who sandwiched Rodimus with an arm around his slim waist.

The speedster blushed heavily from their touches and his spoiler fluttered in interest.

So they took it a step further and began to rub in creaks on his plating that would melt his processor and leave him pliant in their laps and servos.

Rodimus was a drooling mess by the time they finished and when they offered to take him back to their room he agreed thinking with his burning modesty panel instead of his processor that was barely aware he almost leaked through.

By the time he got to their room he was clearing in the processor and clenched his thighs tight trying to come up with an excuse to leave.

But the two were more than aware of his problem and Ratchet stroking a digit on his heating panel’s with Drift nipping at sensitive cable lines left his panels unlocking with an embarrassing pop as fluid gushed free and the two were more than happy to assure him they’d help him clean up.

By the time they finished cleaning Rodimus up he was covered in denta bites, his spike wrung dry from Ratcher valve domming him and his own calves sore from taking the beating Drift’s, later joined by Ratchet’s, spike had given him.

They may not have bonded with Rodimus yet but a claim had been made and when they finally got back to the ship with Drift carrying Rodimus who was deep in recharge exhausted they brought him back to their hab. They’d cuddled up against his frame soaking in the heat he naturally exuded and fell into recharge themselves as the ship cruised the galaxy once more.

It wasn’t until the next day after having an amazing breakfast made by Rodimus who was standing with Ratchet’s help, grabby servos gripping his chassis and hips along with Drift grinding against him pawing at his modesty panels, did they receive a knock on their door.

It was Rodimus who turned and limped to the door excitedly with a flutter of his spoiler to greet an annoyed looking Perceptor and a snickering Brainstorm. Rodimus immediately began talking away about the appropriate part of their trip to Perceptor who smiled a little nodding as he and Brainstorm came inside easily as if they needed no bot’s permission.

That pissed the two off and they were hurt by Rodimus just ditching them for Perceptor who sent Rodimus to get something from his lab. The younger easily agreed and was off with Brainstorm following who was laughing loudly and looking giddy.

As the door closed and Perceptor turned to them with a chilling glare that made them both freeze and forget the reason they were so angry he stood menacingly from the chair and spoke painfully calm.

“If you do one thing to hurt him, in any way, make him cry because you cheated or physically hurt him, even insulted him in a way I find unforgivable…I will do to you what Kup and I did to the last one.”

Perceptor took out a living, glowing spark that still beat from his sub space and held in his servo before giving it a little squeeze.

They watched it beat erratically before going to a normal rhythm and a ping from Kup with the sounds of pained screams was played for the two’s audials.

Perceptor put the spark back in his sub space and looked at the two’s optics with a fierce burning they’ve seen in Rodimus looking at enemies he truly hated.

“I won’t hesitate . Not even for a nano-klik.”

The sound of the door opening and Rodimus bounding in with whatever Perceptor asked him to get was placed in the scientists servos who smiled warmly at Rodimus before rubbing his helm.

It was then Rodimus looked over at the two and tilted his head confused, “are you guys okay?”

A look from Perceptor and the two nodded.

Brainstorm was just laughing his aft off as the two left and Rodimus was so confused.

It was during all their shifts on the bridge a few weeks after being back did they all finally understand and learn why Perceptor and Rodimus were so close and now Brainstorm too.

“Roddy, honey. You cannot paint a planet just because you think the color scheme would look cool.”

“But carrier I could-”

“CARRIER??!!”

It was then the two looked at every confused bot in the room who looked at them with pure shock, amusement on Brainstorms part who was next to them working on the paint ray he was going to gift Rodimus, to Megatron and Minimus who dropped their energon coffee and reports to Drift and Ratchet whose mouths and optics were like fish as they quickly put everything together.

“Huh? Oh well, yeah. Perceptor is my carrier. You couldn’t tell?”

“You look nothing alike!”

Rodimus threw a ball of flames at the mech who said that almost incinerating them if it weren’t for another bot putting it out.

“Roddy we don’t look alike, its fine sweet spark,” Perceptor turned to the others and looked uncaring at them, “is this a problem?”

Brainstorm was just waiting to back up his future conjunx as he unsheathed his claws only for every bot to say it wasn’t.

Most scurried off to gossip in safety while Ratchet and Drift were met with Perceptors knowing smirk as he walked off with Brainstorm trailing after like a love sick puppy.

“You guys don’t have a problem with who my carrier is do you?”

And how could they tell Roddy they were terrified of his carrier when he looked so on guard and afraid of their response?

“No kid, just wished we knew so we could’ve asked for his permission to court you instead of just doing it.” ratchet sighed, accepting his fate.

Drift didn’t put up a fight either as he was soon engulfed with a happy speedster much like Ratchet.

“What have we gotten ourselves into Ratty?”

“A very eventful but worth it future sweet spark,” the medic mouthed back.

The two were a lot more relaxed and took their time now in courting Rodimus now that they knew and they were a lot better at hiding the bite marks they left on his frame to be respectful now that they knew Perceptor and Brainstorm were not competition.

Perceptor was just a scary and caring carrier who would do anything for his sparkling while Brainstorm was a love sick jet puppy who’d do anything for Perceptor and by proxy Rodimus since the two were a package deal.

[dcoraclestan]

Untitled Batfam/Squid Game cross over fan fic

Summary: a sad fan fic where the batfam are in a squid games-esc game playing dodgeball and it comes down to Jason and Tim as the last players on each side but Tim is too scared to say anything so it’s up to Jason to decide whether his team lives or dies and I gave the surviving Robin crippling survivors guilt as they refuse to open their eyes and witness their brother dead on the floor.

Background info: This is chapter 3 of a WIP a few people asked me to post. Basically Bat fam in a squid games situation were forced to split up into two to play dodgeball. They didn’t get to choose the teams and they get one minute to strategize before the game started. The transparent wall kills anyone who crosses it. All of which is explained in chapter one that I haven’t written yet lol. Not important but the teams are Alfred, Tim, Stephanie, Damian, Roxy Rocket, Harley Quinn, Deathstroke, Penguin, and Two Face. The others are Bruce, Selina, Jason, Tiffany, Lucius, Kate, Riddler, Killer Croc, and Scarecrow. If there are any grammar mistakes, just know I’m illiterate. Enjoy!

Ever since they broke off into teams, Alfred had not taken his eyes off Bruce. And while Bruce had done an excellent job at hiding his grief for Dick and Luke, Alfred knew better. Bruce may have been putting on a Batman exterior, but his eyes held the same look as the recently orphaned eight year old latching onto his petticoat, unsure of how to answer Officer Gordon’s questions about his parents’ murder.

Unsure.

Seeing his younger master unsure was what terrified him the most. If it wasn’t for the transparent wall having split the court, Alfred would have been over with his adopted son helping him plan, but instead he was standing with his grandkids attempting to figure out what to do while those that terrorized their nightmares were trying to convince them to win instead of throwing the game.

“Oh please! Like they aren’t over there talking the same shit!” Penguin squawked. “They’re going to kill us all the second they get and be thrilled we’re dead!”

Stephanie clinched her hands, “we need to delay the game! As long as possible at least!”

Roxy laughed, “I’m with this one. Make it exciting!”

“Don’t be stupid,” Deathstroke snapped.

“Aw come on, Willy,” Harley pouted. “Don’t be mean. The poor girl just wants her fake family to rescue them! There’s no chance they will in time, but these hero types always have a hope in them that’s hard to shake.”

“Quinn,” Damian ordered, “please stop talking. We have less than a minute to plan.”

“Planning our own deaths,” Mad Hatter shot. “You hero types never pass up an opportunity to sacrifice yourselves for the greater good. No, we gotta throw all of them in the front lines and make sure they get out fast.”

“You want to throw the three most physically fit members of our team under the bus?” Deathstroke pointed out sarcastically. “Great idea.”

“Fuck you!” Stephanie snapped, raising a fist. “You had no problem pushing Dick down! If it wasn’t for you, he’d be alive!”

Deathstroke rolled his eye. “I told you, I slipped.”

Stephanie threw the first punch which lead to a loud argument of people holding each other back, screaming over each other, and otherwise preforming a mockery of teamwork. Alfred almost joined the fray before turning and noticing Tim was not in the circle. He was standing close to the barrier and staring ahead at the other team.

Alfred approached him, wincing from his now relocated shoulder. “Master Drake, is everything okay?”

Tim shook his head vaguely. “We’re going to die. All of us here. We’re all going to die.”

Alfred’s heart sunk into his stomach, but he kept a gentle expression. “Why do you say that?”

Tim gestured to Bruce in their much more cooperative group huddle. “Batman doesn’t know what to do. I’ve been watching him, Alfred. He hasn’t said a word in their meeting. He also hasn’t let any of us move far away from him. He doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. He’s trying to spend what little time he has left with us. I’ve seen him be less protective when Darksied nearly wiped all of humanity, but… he’s completely given up now.”

The lump in Alfred’s throat grew bigger. He placed his good hand on his shoulder and felt Tim shaking under his palm. “That doesn’t mean there’s no hope, Master Timothy.”

Tim shook his head. “Alfred, don’t try to pretend. We both know we’re not making it out of this school alive.”

Alfred didn’t know what to say as he secretly agreed. Fortunately, the whistle blew so he never had to come up with the words. “Planning period over. The game is about to begin. I repeat. Planning period over. The game is about to begin.”

Everyone got into a vague position to start. All of the inmates were at the front with the bat family further away from the center. Five balls dropped from the ceiling as a new ten minute timer started ticking down. The villains all ran for the balls and started throwing. Alfred and Lucius were not nearly young or healthy enough, and unsurprisingly were benched quickly. All the vigilantes were moving on instinct and muscle memory rather than a desire to live. Each time a ball got caught, someone else was called back in, but that was the only time the bat family spoke. Other than that, they were dodging as best as they could. The only two who were having any resemblance of fun was Harley Quinn and Roxy Rocket who couldn’t help but taunt and jeer at every person who got out. Once both were knocked out by a well aimed throw from Kate, the court was silent because of rule #3. It was obvious those on the bench wanted to say something, but none of them were willing to be shot just to make fun of someone being hit.

Reguardless of where they stood morally, both teams were all were nervous to be playing. All kept subconsciously glancing to Batman every few seconds for a way to get out of the situation entirely. Unfortunately, Batman was not playing the game. No matter how hard he tried, Bruce was the one on the court. Bruce found it impossible to ignore their glances at him for answers.

Similar to red light/green light, after each person was eliminated a whistle blew from no where and their name was called, except this time it wasn’t followed by a gunshot. That didn’t mean Bruce’s heart rate didn’t go up with each blow of the whistle. He kept seeing Dick’s face blown apart by a sniper rifle at too close range, hearing Luke’s chest ripped open by the same gun and Tiffany screaming in fear. Even Clayface and Bane perishing in an equally hideous display crossed his mind. He didn’t want anyone else to die, not even the Arkham inmates. It was senseless violence. All of it. Even then, as Two Face hurled a ball at Riddler’s bad leg with the intention of hurting him more, there wasn’t a reason for it.

Bruce kept trying to rationalize the scene. He was playing dodgeball in an elementary school with his family and enemies. That was the extent he could go. When he managed to get a ball in his hands, all he could think to do was roll it on the ground so no one got out. It was completely pointless. If that timer hit 0 everyone would be dead. Someone was going to have to decide who lives.

Bruce only became aware of his movements when he allowed himself to be hit by a disbelieving Tim who stood alone on the opposite side. Bruce didn't say anything and selfishly walked back to the stands. The ball that bounced off Bruce had rolled back to Tim’s side of the court, hitting his shoe.

“I-I thought he was gonna catch it,” Tim stuttered to the sole member of the other team.

Jason laughed humorlessly. “Bats not sacrificing himself for the greater good? You’re kidding yourself.”

Tim unsteadily picked up the ball at his feet, an unwilling passenger in his own body. He held the ball in his hand shaking violently but felt as though it was ten feet away. He could hear the countdown on the timer. He only had 42 seconds left on the clock. It wasn’t enough time. Less than a minute for half of his family to live. But which half? How does he choose? How could he? He was a teenager, a kid really. One side had more people, more members of his family. But he couldn’t let Damian, Alfred, or Steph die. But if he did let himself live with the others, the rogues had already declared their promise to kill them the moment Batman was dead. The inmates had a numbers advantage on them. They could easily overpower an elderly injured man and three kids who wouldn’t be able to defend themselves without Batman’s help. Tim felt everyone staring at him wanting to shout out their opinions and what he should do. He almost wished they could as it might have blocked out the sound of his beating heart.

“Jay… I can’t do this,” Tim whimpered, shaking where he stood.

Jason searched his mind for a sarcastic comment to shoot back at his brother to make him laugh, but he couldn’t come up with anything. “Tim… man, it’s gonna be alright,” Jason consoled.

“I… I can’t do it. I can’t. We’re all gonna die and it’s gonna be my fault but I can’t choose…”

“Don’t then,” Jason blurted out trying to give him some solace. “Throw it easy. I’ll either catch it or not. It won’t be your fault then, just mine.”

Tim shook his head, “no. We…. Jay it makes more sense for your side to live. Sacrificing yourself I get, but… the only way you have any chance to get out is Bruce and Lucius. We’re just kids over here, and they’re gonna kill us the second Bruce die-“ he stopped himself from finishing his sentence, having to take a deep breath to keep himself from completely breaking down. “But… I don’t want Damian to not grow up. I don’t want Steph to not see Cass again, I don’t want… I don’t want to-“ It was all he could say before sobbing.

“Tim,” Jason’s voice cracked. “There’s not enough time left…” Jason didn’t even realize he was talking, his lips moved without thinking. “E-either way one of us is dead. You don’t even have to choose anything! All of the balls are in your…are in your court, so no matter what… it’s me who has to decide…”

The gravity of it caught up to Jason in that moment. It really was up to him no matter what. Tim could throw whatever he wanted, but he had to either fight for his life or die for his brothers’. Tim was right. Unfortunately, there were more rational adults with more skills on his side. If there was any chance of getting out before the games ended it was with Lucius and Tiffany’s tech skills to override the locks, Selina’s stealth to steal a weapon, Kate’s martial arts skill, and Bruce’s planning. But that would mean…

Jason looked up and saw Steph smiling comfortingly and tears streaming down her face, Alfred standing dignified with Damian uncharacteristically vulnerable leaning up against his leg, refusing to look at the court. Tim was hugging the ball to his chest tightly, the only thing he could do at the moment, trying his best to keep from crying.

The clock was ticking down, now at ten seconds. Jason had to make up his mind quickly. He found Bruce’s eyes and quietly asked what to do. Bruce looked away and down at his hand in his lap clutching onto his wife’s. A small gesture that told Jason what he would do if the roles were reversed.

Jason turned to Tim and gave him a single nod. He had made his decision. Tim threw the ball up in the air and time seemed to freeze. All eyes were on the second Robin, watching his every moment. They saw his feet move to become more center with the ball, directly in its path.

There was the sound of the ball making impact. Jason closed his eyes and waited, the familiar feeling creeping up in him that death was about to come. Jason hated that the last image Tim would ever have of him would be of him shaking and terrified, but no matter what he did he could not manage to muster up a smile onto his face.

“It’s gonna be okay-“

BANG

BANG

BANG

BANG

BANG

BANG

BANG

BANG

BANG

No final words were granted. No goodbyes were given. One by one, the sound of bodies dropping to the floor echoed in the tiny gym. The former Robin’s eyes had shut tight with the first gun shot, not wanting to see his brother mutilated before him. He could feel his brother’s brain matter coating his hands and the blood soaking into his shirt but as long as his eyes were shut, everything was fine. As long as his eyes were closed his family was alive. As long as he didn’t look, almost all of his siblings were still standing.

He didn’t cry as he stood there. He couldn’t if he tried as his grip of reality started to pull away from him. This was his nightmare, his absolute nightmare. The former Robin couldn’t think of a worse scenario for him to be in. It was just up to him and his brother to choose the fates of his family. There was no way this was happening. Kidnapping almost his whole family to play children’s games to the death?! That’s completely insane. It may have been Gotham but-

Scarecrow.

It had to of been. He had to be under the influence of fear toxin. There’s no other way. It was the only thing that made any sense. It was all of his worst fears wrapped up into one. A high dose of fear toxin.

“This isn’t real,” he said out loud. “This isn’t real. This isn’t happening. This isn’t real. This isn’t real. This isn’t real.” He repeated this over and over and over again, each time somehow shutting his eyes tighter and tighter, refusing to open them. He knew this couldn’t have been true, the timeline of events was too coherent to be a hallucination, but he could manifest it into being fake if he tried hard enough. He could make it true. He could make it so his brothers were alive. If he just repeated this, it would-

“It’s going to be alright,” a man’s voice said, clasping a firm hand on his shoulder. “You’re going to be alright.”

Jason snapped out of his trance to see the rubber ball still in his hands. There was the clear sign of skull and brain coating the outside of it, the last remainder he had of Tim. The transparent do-not-cross wall was already dividing the court, but Jason could not bring himself to look through it and instead stared down at the ball in his hand.

“I-I caught it…” Jason stated, holding it up to Bruce beside him. “I caught it.”

Bruce nodded, jaw tensed, swallowing a lump in his throat. “It’s okay. You’re going to be okay.”

Jason looked right through Bruce. “I caught it…” he breathed out and lowered his arms. “I caught it…”

Bruce didn’t say anything, but instead wrapped his arms around his son and pulled him in tight. Jason did not hug him back. He didn’t seem to have noticed at all that he had moved. The ball in his hands was the only thing grounding him to reality as it was a fact that he caught the ball. He saved Bruce, Selena, Tiffany, Kate, and Lucius.

He caught the ball.

“I caught it,” Jason was still repeating over and over as Bruce gripped him tighter. “I caught it.”

“Thank God you did!” Ed Nigma scoffed, limping down the stands. “I was worried you were about to do something stupid.”

Jason didn’t hear him. His chin was resting on his adopted dad’s shoulder. The ball was pressing in under Bruce’s ribcage but similar to the last living Robin, he didn’t notice anything other than Jason’s grip on this world slipping away as he kept stating how he saved his life. Bruce was already numb from the moment he turned around and saw his oldest son had been shot in the head. His daughter, father, and other two sons shared the same fate.

Jason still hadn’t cried nor stopped repeating himself. It might have been better if he did either. Bruce didn’t know what to do or how best to comfort him. It was Bruce’s fault he was like this. Bruce purposefully tagged himself out, not so Tim would have a chance, but so he didn’t have to make the final decision.

“I… I caught the ball,” Jason finally differed slightly from his script. “I caught the ball.”

“It’s going to be okay, Jason,” Bruce comforted. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Bruce wished his voice wasn’t so monotone. It might have helped if he has some emotion, angry or sad, or anything. But Bruce pushed down all of his pain, all of his feelings. He didn’t allow himself to grieve, not yet. Not only was it unproductive, but he knew once he started crying he would never be able to stop. He had to focus on what he had, and all he had was four people outside this game presumably trying to break them out, a wife who he loved deeply, his one living cousin, one of his oldest friends and his loyal daughter, and one surviving son right in front of him who was unable to cope with the decision he made and would haunt him forever.

“You did nothing wrong,” Bruce repeated. “It’s going to be okay. You did nothing wrong.”

Bruce didn’t know how long they stood there repeating themselves over and over, each one not interrupting the other.

Eventually, a gentle hand was placed on Bruce’s back. “Sweetheart,” Selina consoled, “we should probably go before they kick us out.”

Bruce did not make a conscious effort to let go of Jason, but he found himself walking towards the gym door all the same, one arm wrapped around his son to guide him.

Jason was still clutching the rubber ball in his hand when the voice announcement came on overhead. “No taking game items outside of the playing field. I repeat. No taking game items outside the playing field.”

Selina unwrapped herself from Bruce’s side, stopping Bruce from taking a step out the door. “Jason,” Selina cautioned gently.

Jason looked through her and held up the rubber ball just like he did minutes earlier to Bruce. “I caught it.”

Selina smiled as warmly as she could. “I know. I know you did. We have to leave it behind now. Is that alright?”

Jason’s eyes went to the ball where a fragment of Tim’s skull was practically glued to it with now dried blood. “I…caught the ball…”

Selina reached out carefully and placed her hands as best as she could so she didn’t touch any gore on it. “I’m going to take this from you. Can I do that?”

Jason watched his own hands unwrap themselves from the ball and have it settle in Selina’s hands.

“Thank you, Jason,” Selina thanked before going back to the stands and gently placing it down on the bleachers so it didn’t make a sound.

“Y-yeah…” Jason mumbled, still holding his hands out as though nothing had been taken from him.

Bruce rubbed Jason’s arm for comfort and continued walking down the hallway once Selina was next to him again. The only sound down the hallway was Jason’s mutters of catching a ball getting quieter and quieter.

“B-B-Bruce?” Jason asked as they neared the corridor to the kindergarten classroom.

“Yes?” Bruce responded.

“I…I think I’m done,” Jason admitted. “Yeah, I don’t want to play any more games. I’m gonna… I just want to go home.”

Bruce stopped in the hallway and turned to be in front of him with Selina stopping a step behind Bruce. Bruce suddenly did not see a 19 year old Jason Todd standing in front of him, but rather the 12 year old Boy Wonder who just wanted to do good in the world. He didn’t know what else to do other than kneeling down to his knee and grabbing Jason’s arms. Bruce couldn’t think of what to say, but somehow the words came out of him. “You made a hard choice back there, Jay. No one would deny that. There was no right or wrong decision, only one that-.”

“They probably felt how I did…” Jason muttered.

Bruce felt his heart shatter as Jason’s eyes finally focused on him. “I…I made them watch the clock tick down to their deaths. They didn’t deserve that.” Bruce froze, finally understanding what Jason had been trying to tell him. He watched as Jason’s eyes shifted away from reality once more and stared off into the abyss. “I caught the ball…” Jason began repeating again.

The first tear fell out of Bruce’s eyes without him knowing. They were silently streaming down his face, knowing for a fact that this was his fault. He left the decision up to Jason. This was Bruce’s doing. And he would have to live with that for the rest of his life.

[amloveabledeathmo]

(Some background for this idea, Sherlock is Demisexual and after spending enough time with John he realizes he loves John and wants a relationship but we all know he can't start it after telling John he was married to his work and not interested in people. John is bi but after the immediate rebuff at the beginning of their acquaintance he doesn't want to push himself on Sherlock. He also only dates women because the only man he wants is Sherlock, in fact the only person but it's easier to not compare women to Sherlock.)

Sherlock gets a case where people have not only had their personal information (and money) stolen but also their private relationships exposed. He comes to find out that they have all stayed at a fancy hotel. Said hotel is well known for it's discretion and is also a popular destination for fancy business events.

Instead of deciding to go as friends, work colleagues, siblings, cousins, hotel staff, or as people who don't even know each other, Sherlock decides that him and John absolutely have no other option but to go as a couple. John of course agrees, after all Sherlock is the genius and he would like to know what dating Sherlock would entail, even if they are going undercover as not themselves and the dating is totally fake.

They tell Mrs. Hudson since she is their emergency contact. No one else knows about the case.

Once they arrive they are given just a standard two queen room (I'm american and in every hotel I've stayed at that is the default room, no I've never been to a fancy hotel). Safely in the room they stand looking at the beds for awhile before Sherlock says they should probably share a bed as they are supposed to be a couple on their first vacation together and of course you wouldn't want anyone who saw their room to gossip. John readily agrees and they place their suitcases on the unused bed. When they go to sleep they are laying stiffly on opposite sides of the bed but by morning they are closer together and John's arm is over Sherlock's stomach and Sherlock's leg is over John's hip. Of course these brilliant and totally not in love guys just ignore it.

After breakfast they decide to explore the hotel and it's amenities. At the spa they book a couples massage for the next day and continue to the gardens and tennis court and indoor pool. Besides the spa the rest of the stuff is included in their stay. They talk to staff and other guests and before bed discuss their findings.

Afternoon of the next day they arrive to the spa to wait for their turn. Much to everyone's surprise, Mycroft and Greg emerge from the massage room. There are a few beats of shocked silence before Mycroft tells Sherlock he's happy that him and John have finally worked things out and poor mummy and daddy won't be getting any grandkids. John bursts out why not? We can always adopt or go with a surrogate, I think Sherlock would make a great father.

Sherlock turns to stare at John lovingly and Mycroft and Greg kinda cough uncomfortably before Greg says they aren't yet at the stage in their relationship to discuss kids. After some awkward congratulations going both ways about the relationships John and Sherlock go in for their appointment.

Of course they are both convinced that the other is such a good actor so as to have been able to dupe Mycroft into thinking they could actually be together. Both ignore all the obvious signs that they other likes them. In only two more days Sherlock discovers the front desk clerk who has been passing the personal information to reporters about the high level secret couples and the spa worker who has been stealing the credit card or bank numbers from clients.

After they get home, while John is typing up the case, Sherlock quietly asks if he really does think he'd make a good father. John points out all the reasons he thinks he would be and Sherlock goes quiet. John asks if that's something he wants and Sherlock explains that he never thought he'd find someone who he wanted kids with before he met John.

John whips his head around to look at Sherlock who looks shocked he said that out loud. John asks if he really meant that he wanted kids with John. Sherlock apologizes and says he knows John's straight and not interested in him. John cuts him off saying he's bi and has been interested since the moment they met.

Christmas is interesting that year at Sherlock's parents who are absolutely delighted that not one but both of their boys had a significant other to bring.

[axelsagewrites]

Lemon Cakes and Other Gifts

Pairing: Aemond x F!Strong!Reader

Summary: Someone has been leaving Princess Helena’s lady in waiting gifts in her chamber and Helena and (Y/N) struggle to figure out who until (Y/N) catches him lemon cake handed.

TW: none

Word Count: 1959

Part one. Part two is up and linked at the bottom.

Masterlist Here

There were few comforts at court since your father and brother died. You still technically had Larys but while he was your ward you had never been close with your older brother. At least not as close as you had been to Harwin. You were so much younger than the pair that Larys was often bored of your presence, but Harwin had loved it. he loved having a little sibling to play with and take care of. He taught you how to fight with a stick then a wooden sword then eventually, without telling your father, a real one. Larys wasn’t mean or cruel he just…didn’t care. So you were surprised he decided to keep you with him at court when your father and brother died. You expected to be sent back to Harrenhall. Instead, you stayed at court and became Helena’s official lady in waiting. You had always been friends before this, being raised side by side in court due to your father being the king's hand, so all your duties were basically just doing what you usually did. You would read with her, talk, take walks, do her hair, and listen to her dreams. But Larys seemed happy with the ‘upgrade’. Being so close with Helena meant being close to her brothers. While Aegon and you knew each other you rarely spoke though when you did it was often him asking for milk of the poppy for his hangovers. Aemond talked to you more often however still not a lot. Occasionally you would have dinner with his sister and him, and sometimes the rest of the Targaryen Hightower as well. He would talk about all things polite and expected but you would often catch him looking at you.

When you walked the halls with Helena you couldn’t tell if he was watching you or his sisters. However, even when Helena was not around you could swear you saw him glancing. You never had the nerve to glance back more than once. Sometimes if you were brave twice. It was hard not to stare but somehow you managed. After a long day at court of fake smiling and making connections that made you nauseous, you returned to your chambers to find a plate of lemon cakes sitting on the table by your window. You couldn’t help but smile as you relaxed with your treats by the window, watching the sunset. You didn’t even question who had left them. Then the next day arrived, and you found more treats in your room. A plate of iced currant cakes sat in the same spot the lemon cakes had. The day after that it was spiced cake. After that, it was gingered brie tart then cheesecake then strawberry pudding on the 7th day. Each day you grew more suspicious that the kitchen didn’t just feel like being nice to you. You had asked a servant who often attended your chambers but she said she didn’t know. Who had been coming into your room to leave treats? Then it made sense. “Helena,” You smiled as you jogged to catch up to her and take her arm. “(Y/N)! you look happier than usual,” she said, linking her arm with yours as you began to walk together. “Would you like to join me in the gardens?” “I would love to,” You beamed, “Also I wanted to say thank you. The cakes were so sweet, but you really didn’t need to,” Helena’s face scrunched up “what cakes? Though im glad they’re making you happy. If I knew that’s all it took I would’ve hired a personal baker,” “The cakes? The ones I’ve been finding in my room every night,” You stopped walking and Helena turned to look at you “It’s not been you leaving them?” “I haven’t the foggiest idea what you’re talking about,” After filling her in on all the details you finally arrived at the gardens. You sat together on the grass by a large yew tree on the edge of the garden. “That’s so strange,” she said, “but im more worried about what stranger is going into your room. Unless the servant girl was lying and does know,” “But why would she lie? Who wouldn’t want me to know they’re a nice person?” you said. Suddenly Helena's smile took over her face, “You must have a secret admirer. Oh (Y/N) this is so adorable. Some starry-eyed lover is leaving you cakes!” You laughed as she took your hands, “Helena that doesn’t change me not knowing who’s been going in my room,” As you both laughed and talked together, speculating who it may be, you saw Aemond walk past, and your eyes felt glued to him however when you saw him walking over to you both you tore your eyes away. “Sister. (Y/N). you both seem very giggly today. Should I be scared?” he asked, raising an eyebrow, Before you could stop her Helena already started “(Y/N) has a secret admirer. Someone has been leaving her cakes in her room for the past week. We’re trying to think who it could be. Have you heard anything,” you felt your cheeks grow redder as she spoke. A smirk began to ghost Aemond’s face, “I can’t say I have but I will be sure to keep an ear out. Are there any suspects in particular?” “Not yet,” Helena said, “but im dying to find out who. I wonder what they’ll leave you tomorrow,” “Well if they keep leaving cakes my teeth may fall out,” you joked. Aemond’s smirk disappeared but you couldn’t tell why. He was probably getting bored of your conversation, “then again id be happy with anything he left me. It’s just nice to be appreciated,” Aemond smiled “I understand. I’ll let you girls know if I hear anything. Goodbye sister. (Y/N).”

Later that night you returned to your chambers and went to check what treat you received this time only to find a book instead. Maybe your admirer had realised the effects of eating so many sweets. From that night your gifts started to vary far more. You found books, flowers, fruits, honey, perfume, wine, and still the occasional sweet treat. After a full month of these gifts, you were desperate to find out who had been leaving them. The servants insisted they had no knowledge, and you didn’t like to try intimidating them. By this point, Aegon had also found out and took to teasing you about who it could be. You just hoped it didn’t get back to your brother. Usually, you didn’t head back to your chambers till after yours and Helena's usual dinner at 7 however her son had spat up on you halfway through and you needed to return to change. As you walked down the corridor from Helena’s room to your own you attempted to wipe the stain away with a rag. You were so preoccupied you didn’t even see Aemond until you had already knocked into him. “Im so sorry my prince I- “ “It’s okay,” You looked up and watched as his face went red, “I was just leaving. Goodnight,” You watched as Aemond rushed down the corridors and disappeared down the stairs. He had rushed off before he went to either his mother's or Helena’s chambers, only Helena’s children’s chambers and your own and there were in this corridor. You couldn’t help but wonder what happened. Maybe the smell of the baby's spit had grossed him out. You couldn’t tell. Eventually, you turned and headed to your own chambers to change. After a struggle of trying to get your dress on and your nightgown on did you even think to check the table by the window. You walked over to the table and found a velvet box which you opened to reveal a gold chain necklace with a flower pendant. You smiled as your fingers traced the flower and carefully took it from its box. The chain felt so delicate against your skin. After putting it on you sat by the window, watching over the courtyard with one hand on the necklace. You looked down to see Aemond walking across the courtyard. He stopped and turned for a second and he looked up at your room. You smiled and used your free hand to wave. For once you didn’t feel afraid to look at him. You couldn’t tell if he smiled back but he waved back and continued walking.

The next day you showed Helena the necklace and she gushed over it. she insisted it meant he was getting more serious, and he’d show his face soon. You weren’t so sure, but you couldn’t help feeling excited. A few days passed and you headed to Helena’s chamber to have your usual dinner when you found out she was ill. She insisted it was nothing and you would have dinner the next night but she was just tired. You kissed her forehead and wished her well and returned to your own room to have dinner there. You opened the door to your chambers and went to walk to your bed when you heard something smash and your head snapped to where the table by the window was. “Aemond?” you asked as he frantically tried to pick up the broken plate and now ruined lemon cakes. “Are you okay?” “Im fine im sorry I just knocked this over im sorry,” “Hey, it’s okay,” you said as you walked over and crouched beside him, gently taking the pieces out of his hands, and sitting them on the table, “Its only lemon cake,” Aemond nodded his head and finally stood up but wouldn’t look at you, instead staring at the floor. You placed a hand on his shoulder, “Are you okay?” “I’m fine,” he mumbled, eyes still glued to the floor, “I’ll leave you be. Goodnight (Y/N),” As Aemond quickly walked to the door you looked at the plate and then to him, “Did you leave these here?” Aemond froze. You had never seen him lost for words. He was quite sure. But he was quiet by choice. He always had a response for everything. But now he stood in the middle of your room silent as a ghost and almost as pale as one. “What are you doing in my room Aemond?” you pressed, walking towards him. “Are you the one that’s been leaving me all these gifts?” You walked in front of the prince, forcing him to look at you. “And if I have?” he asked. “Would you be mad?” “Why would I be mad?” you smiled. “I don’t know,” He whispered as he looked down again. You smiled, taking a step closer, “Well if it had been you, I would need to say thank you. Then id need to try make up for all the gifts you gave me,” Aemond eyes darted up to look at you. A smile finally started to come across his face. “How would you make it up to me? If I had of course,” “Well, if you had,” you said taking another step closure, only being a few inches apart, “I might just have to kiss you,” Aemond waited no more time and closed the gap. He grabbed your waist and brought you in to kiss you. Your hands went to his chest to try to steady yourself which only seemed to make the kiss get deeper. Eventually, you had to pull away for air and you rested your forehead on his. “I’ll need to get you more lemon cakes,” Aemond said as he grinned down at you. You couldn’t stop the smile on your face, “I can think of something I want more than cakes right now,” you said as you pulled him back in for another kiss.

Part two here

A/N: First time writing for GOT/HOTD and spell check hates their names. It’s also my first time in 3 years writing fanfic again so it was fun.

Very tempted to make a part 2 because the thing that inspired this didnt even make it in the story

[emblemxeno]

Tbh I don’t quite understand the sentiment that Engage doesn’t have good or any worldbuilding at all, like tf is up with that. First instinct would be “them 3H fans again!!!” but other long time FE fans also consider it lackluster and idk I don’t agree. 

Each of the four nations all have surface level distinctions, but in-depth internal layers, such as...

Firene values peace, gratitude, and its harvests, tea, and medicine. It’s the kingdom that would usually be taken advantage of, but the reason it maintains its peace is through aggressive policy done by its leaders, currently by Eve and very notably followed up by Celine. Medicine and health is taken seriously cuz the last king died from an illness, the same illness which the current and well loved prince is suffering from. The Firene retainers are all nobles sans Louis, who is noted to have gotten his role because of his domestic skill in tandem with his martial prowess; this implies a sort of status quo, one that’s maintained to keep things peaceful, though not overly enforced to the point of oppression. 

Brodia is wealthy and martially strong, yet prideful. The nobility is noted to take advantage of the constant wars on Elusia, as it fuels economy, which in turn fuels more wars. The wars against Elusia themselves are partly an extension of Brodia’s pride: aggressive expansion done in the name of “keeping a wicked nation in check” and to further Brodian way of life. Because strength is valued, the Brodian retainers are all common folk who proved themselves, sans Citrinne, who develops a complex about her strength because of it. Mining is the primary income source after warfare, something that Diamant wants to shift towards to the dismay of war benefitting nobles.

Elusia is the kingdom of knowledge, and as such, is the only nation noted to have a major place of education. The arts and the leisure seems to be highly valued here, due to an author, an artist, and a native to a hot spring centered village being recruited. Retainers, like in Brodia, are decided by strength or capability; after all, you don’t often have a Crown Princess’s servants be a former assassin and a former prince without skill and knowledge being paramount in the decision making. Hyacinth has too much love to go around, and so has a wife as well as many mistresses, and many children as a result. Knowledge begets avenues of possibility, which means one can use said knowledge to selfishly get ahead (such as the Elusian court where backstabbing and fake platitudes to appeal to the King and Queen were common place) or to benefit the world around you (Hortensia using her intellect and talent to help war victims, and Ivy utilizing Elusia’s creativity and innovative practices to better the public’s wellbeing). Seeking knowledge, however, can entrench one in dark practices, which is why the worship of the Fell Dragon went from notable to beligerent and dangerous.

Solm values freedom, and is notable for being a strict matriarchy. Only women take the throne, Merrin’s village is only ran by women, and Panette and Pandreo’s family church was headed by their mother. While open minded and easy going on the surface, Solm having its own elite vigilante group and having spies throughout the continent means that the queendom takes measures to ensure freedom very seriously; these actions are similar to Firene, which is brought up in Celine and Fogado’s support, and the two themselves are indicative of each of their nations cultures. Unlike the other nations, there’s no strict basis for who becomes a retainer, since you have a chef, a priest, and two runaways. The people of Solm live their lives how they want, and its culture is more open to entertainment and large gatherings than other nations.

And this is just what I whipped together from memory. I’ve no doubt that there’s tons of other minute details that, when pieced together, form more descriptions of the nations as a whole. This, to me, is on part with how the GBA games and Echoes built their worlds. Very solid in depth readings, with surface level broad strokes to entice the player in should they choose to put more hours into learning the ins and outs. And that isn’t even getting into the artistic directions of each nation and the characters (like outfits, seasonal representations, food/ingredients, etc.). Hell, the entirety of Elyos is shaped like a ring for crying out loud! It’s screaming “yeah the rings are this central to this world, enjoy your stay.”

I like that. Engage knows what it is and what it wants to present. No more, no less.

[everybody-loves-purdy]

I think I'd be more interesting if Root wasn't a great mate/father,

not in the asshole way like Crowfucker but like never moving on from Bristle.

While I like to theorize that Moonpaw's voice is actually Bristle (or Goosefeather, which is a whole other can of worm) and the new series is about saving her/her spirit, I think Rootspring never being able to move on is SO much more interesting.

Picture this:

Wren confesses to Root who decides to give it a chance as he's very close with his family, it's something he's always wanted to have. They court and become mates, but Root still feels empty (it's a mix of depression, PTSD, and derealization from his time in Dark Forest/Never being able to see his first love in Heaven because she's double dead + Bramble's Ghost/Civil War).

He confesses he "wants a family" to Wren who immediately says yes and is ready to have kits, she's head-over-heels for him after all. Wren and Root have a good relationship and Root does his best to be a good mate. Kits are born and the two are happy... but it's clear Root does not feel any romantics towards Wren.

As the kits grow, Root is present but not entirely and towards the kits being 6 moons. Root breaks it off with Wren who is hurt but not surprised. Root and Wren become an awkward divorced couple as both care deeply about one another, and neither really hates the other. The kits are purely plot drivers as Wren and Root don't talk to each other much but still love their kits. After a lot of pushing and the kits pointing out their bullshit, the two talk.

By the time Wren and Root have a conversation and closure, I want Root to think about what he's done to his kits (i.e. neglect) and try to change for them. He has known that he needed help but refused to get any for so long, I mean what's the point? It's in the past. But his kits are quick to point out that "Bitch, we thought you didn't love us because you barely talked to us," and Root goes "Oh fuck my trauma has traumatised my own children, I REALLY need help." Root gets better and strives to be a better father...and friend.

Wren has her own development post-divorce. Being the only survivor of her litter, having helicopter parent Bellaleaf, and the expectation of continuing Skyclan's bloodline, shape Wren to be the stereotypical she-cat her society wants her to be. Wren latches onto Root as he's cute and kind and clearly not looking for anyone to be his mate. Wren DID fall in love with him eventually, but her initial attraction to him was purely because he's mate material: the dude is A Light in the Mist. A hero. So he's the perfect guy to have a family with.

The divorce was something Wren saw coming but didn't expect it to happen. She expected that she and Root would raise a few kits and just live out their days as mates, even if it was just in title. But Root wasn't happy. Root wasn't happy with HER (not really but it's how it came across). Wren has an identity crisis as having a mate and kits has been her goal in life since she herself was a kit. After some soul searching, Wren realizes that her dream isn't her own. It's society's.

Wren starts to work on herself. She had been told that she didn't have to be a good fighter or hunter to be a good mate and mother, so her kits decided to do some training with her to gain more confidence. But she's bad. Like. Really bad. Even her kits are like "Mom? No offence you REALLY suck, are you okay??" Then to the fun reveal that Wren cheated on her warrior assessment so she could get closer to Root. She's been able to scrape by without anyone noticing her so far because CAN hunt and fight, she just needs a bit more training. The guilt of faking her assessment plagues her, so her kits take it upon themselves to be her mentor/s. For drama's sake, Hawkwing overhears a conversation about Wren faking her assessment and is pissed. He has a private conversation with Wren + the kits about keeping this from him, and Wren is a wreak about someone finding out her shameful secret. She and her kits apologise. Hawk, being the himbo he is, goes, "Why are you apologising??? You can just take the assessment again??" Thus, upping the stakes and giving Wren motivation.

I think Root and Wren would have a talk before Wren's private assessment as they've both worked on themselves enough to hold a conversation and not just awkwardly ignore each other (This is only because I want Root and the kits to cheer her on during her assessment heheh). Root talks about his mental health, Bristle, the DF, all of it. He apologises for leading her on as he did want to have a mate and she's a great she-cat, she didn't deserve to be hurt like that. He also talks about how his mental health affects the kits and swears to be better for them, her, and mostly importantly himself. Wren apologises as well for being pushy about wanting kits/being mates to which Root is like 'Stop don't apologise, I wanted to be mates and have kits too'.

Wren talks about how Root made her feel like she wasn't there. How no matter what she did, nothing seemed to make him happy. She loved him and all she wanted was for him to be happy, happy with her. Wren talks about the fragile personality she adapted to seem more appealing, and how in the hopes of needing a 'big strong man' to help her, Root would be happy. Wren talks about how life-changing getting divorced was for her lol and how their kits have been helping her this whole time re-take her warrior assessment. She's ready to live for herself too. She apologises to Root for not being what she desires but she's okay that she isn't, Wren wants to be what she wants now: a warrior.

Ofc Wren passes her assessment and everyone cheers : D I'd like to think Root and Wren stay separated but become besties. Root becomes a better cat mentally and Wren breaks her own (albeit forced) social norm to be what SHE wants, as she should.

anyway erins hire me

This is so good I really love this idea