#so the fact that she doesn't even think about trying to do that and perpetuates the cycle instead is super interesting to me

[meowchela]

random ass lps popular thought but i literally dont understand people who treat brooke like shes innocent solely because her mom is shitty??? like to me it seems like a very clear "villain origin story that explains why they are the way they are but doesn't redeem them". her mom is neglectful and abusive, yes, but a lot of her actions through the series are like. completely divorced from that conflict. brooke may be taking ques from her mom with the whole cutthroat social attitude she has going on but her actions are still very much her own, like she only got the baseline ideology of "you need to stay at the top to have any worth" from her mom and everything else (the manipulation, cheating, blackmail, etc) is all stuff she chose to do herself to attain that goal. and even THEN she's doing it all completely to serve herself, her mom couldn't care less about her daughter's status in high school. brooke probably knows this and is doing whatever she can to derive self worth from her social status alone because she's all too aware that her mom just doesnt give a shit. so everything she does is still on her

i guess a more succinct way of putting it is like. brooke's backstory is more of a frame for her mindset than something you should feel sorry for her over, yknow? because as badly as she's treated at home she turns around and treats everyone around her the exact same way. abuse is cyclical and it's crystal clear that brooke is willingly continuing the cycle because she's obsessed with the power it gives her, power that was stolen from her that she's now stealing from others. and the kicker here is she HAD chances to make positive changes, both with her dad treating her nicer while he was still alive which establishes that she does know how to be kind as well as savy being willing to reconnect and give her genuine friendship again which could've helped her out of this toxic mindset. but she threw both of those chances away because she's so power hungry and is CHOOSING to continue acting like her mom because that's what gets her the most power/worth.

she needs help, but she doesn't deserve forgiveness or sympathy because of all the heinous shit she's done. also, you can't help someone unless they accept the help and/or are willing to change, and we've seen that brooke is NOT willing to change at all. idk man i just dont think we should be so fast to absolve her of accountability when she hasn't shown any willingness to overcome her circumstances. like not even "oh i want to change but things are so hard" no she doesn't want to change full stop. shes stuck in her mindset and that's her downfall and that's the point

anyway brooke would fucking love marina and the diamonds. unrelated to everything

[bitofanupsidedowner]

we're past the appropriate rejection window honestly. remember how steve is rejected by robin in the same season he develops feelings for her? or how dustin is symbolically rejected by max in the season he develops feelings for her? that's because it would have been a super weird choice to build it up for a really long time and then end it with a rejection.

there's a reason why in season three when joyce rejects hopper, we all immediately know it isn't a real rejection, even though they're fighting, she's grieving and planning to leave, and he's being unreasonable and unfair. there's reason after reason to think it's not going to happen, but because he's had feelings for her since season one we know it's going somewhere.

who waits on the edge of their seat to watch someone get turned down? who stays subscribed to netflix for that? that kind of thing would not be interesting, it would just be a confusing way to spend the increasingly limited time right before your show ends. penultimate season. every scene has to mean something bigger, all the way down to lucas talking about new coke or mike trying a new kind of pizza.

in writing you primarily only want to wait and build up to things if the result is going to be worth waiting for. rejection of the perpetually tortured gay kid is predictable and doesn't function to do much at all story wise. easy to write around, too, but they did the opposite. they built will's character around this.

they also have no need to dip back into the rejection pool narratively, doesn't add to the story. especially this late into the game. (sidenote, weird how people were not nearly as sure robin was going to be rejected despite her love interest being mirrored to mike, significantly less developed, and introduced so late, but i digress)

if they wanted mike to reject will, it should have been during the van scene. he should have given mike the painting and said something along the lines of, "i know you don't feel the same, but i really want you to know how el sees you, how we all see you. you're the heart. we'd fall apart without you." it would have still been sad but it would have been an ending.

because plotlines need to end! they need to end when it makes sense for them to, not before or after. dragging it along means they either realize they have something worth dragging, or have deliberately decided to prolong a plot point past its logical conclusion for the sole purpose of milking every last second of misery they can out of will, which would be needlessly cruel and so, so gratuitous.

it's not like the van scene NEEDED to happen exactly how it happened. any scene that is solely character driven with no impact on the plot can be rewritten over and over and changed into whatever it has to be. it was written as the most romantic mike moment in any season, and it was filmed and lit and directed extremely specifically. zero accidents.

robin and vickie was unnecessary without a plan. mike and will was unnecessary unless they have a plan.

so they must have a plan. if mike was going to reject will, it had to be in season four. but mike didn't reject will. not at all. he was actually very, very moved by what will had to say, he just didn't entirely realize what it was he was saying.

in fact, they made sure that this plotline was not just unsolved, but that it was obligated to come back, by having it go against the character's most consistent moral line of friends don't lie. and gave it to the character who, in his introductory scene, refuses to lie. dishonesty has genuine ramifications in this show, and will's is attached to a physical (treasured) object that has to come back into play. they can't sweep it under the rug and mike can't reject will without it coming off as... just... far too late.

[the-knight-of-the-stars]

Are we gonna talk about how that finale entirely erased any conversation about class divisions or are we too focused on ships?

Are we gonna talk about how Caitlyn for a good chunk of the season willingly enforces violence and opression against the lowest class, no doubt directly causing more deaths and suffering, and she is forgiven by the narrative without any meaningful reflecting?

Her great moment getting together with Vi is right after she JUST had a conversation with Jinx where we see she STILL doesn't recognize any class bias she clearly has, insted making it about HER.

Her and the other enforcers are treated like noble heroes in the final battle, all the blame put on Ambesa. Vi's happy ending is getting into a relationship with the exact type of person who perpetuated all the suffering she endured as a child.

Are we gonna talk about how Jayce never leaves his privilege pedestal, never actually reflects on how he was also enforcing violence to the people of the undercity and living on his bliss of progress at THEIR expense?

Jayce, who got help on every step of the way to get to where he is, who wasn't disabled, who never lived the kind of poverty or class obstacles Viktor did, who never recognized the harm he enabled and was complicit to, HE was the one to tell Viktor "People build their own destiny." and "There is beauty in imperfection" ?????

Not to mention the whole bit where he implies Viktor did all that because he wanted to "eradicate what he thought was weakness"??? Didn't we stablished Viktor wanted to HELP THE PEOPLE FROM THE UNDERCITY TO HAVE BETTER LIFE CONDITIONS?? don't try to gaslight me.

I know this is just a TV show, but I need to remind everyone that what perpetuates opressive, discriminatory and violent systems as long and as deeply as they do is indiference. Is turning your head and enabling others to stay ignorant.

Edit: You guys are misunderstanding me. And I admit it is probably my fault, I wrote this high with emotion I wasn't as eloquent.

Jayce's exact choice of words or his time living in the alternate world is nowhere near my point.

My point is, that the narrative is establishing that the privileged character, is the one that has to show (and is quite literally, textually, always the one to show) the underprivileged character that "he was looking at life the wrong way." Forgetting that Viktor's journey of feeling powerless was greatly influenced by the fact he was poor and from the undercity.

That's what I meant by it erasing the part of the plot about class systems. In the end, the story only requires Jayce to understand Viktor's struggle on a superficial level, but the text never recognizes that it as the product of a deeply rooted SYSTEMIC ISSUE. One Jayce and even Viktor on some level, benefited from and perpetuated.

Understanding Viktor still doesn't give him any moral ground, and nobody ever challenges him on that because the story isn't interested in that anymore.

And the same with Caitlyn. She knows what she did what's wrong, fine, she feels bad. Like I said, she still has a class bias, and no character challenges her on it again because the story derails to magic and fighting and whatnot.

The plot just forgets (or ignores) that layer of the story despite it being so prominent up until now.

And ignoring the class discussion does a disservice to every single character because they were initially built on it. You can see it in how they lose the essence they had on s1.

I know y'all love the characters and want to empathize with all their motivations, okay? But the fundamental issue is that characters also represent things, and more so in a story as political as this one. We also have the right to point out that the show told us they represented something and then abandoned that narrative.

What do I think they could have done differently? If I tell you scene by scene we could be here for an entire year. The gist of it is: I think they should have stuck to the character themes they already had established.

Vi as someone fiercely loyal to the undercity beyond her relationship with Powder/Jinx, and being "cursed" by the role of the older sister. Jayce as someone with good intentions but who is ultimately limited by his blind idealism. Mel as a cunning politician who thinks she is on the right path because she isn't violent like her mother, not realizing she is still perpetuating it. Caitlyn as someone kind and compassionate who realizes the institutions she believed in are fundamentally flawed, and because of the way they are built will never be on the side of kindness. Etc, etc.

None of that gets any meaningful resolution.

I am glad if you liked it, or got something from it, you are entitled to your opinion.

I wanted to say this because I was angry, and still am. Because there was so much incredible potential, and honestly, to me, it feels like the writers chickened out on actually saying something in the end.

That's all I have to say about that.

[justabeewithapen]

Sniling so widely at the critters

What’s the dynamic when Doey, Lucas, and Bella are together?

GRINNING SO BIG BACK AT YOU!!! I have so much I am so sorry here, have a doodle before I throw you into the read more:

Their dynamic is very much like siblings. There is definitely a reason they usually only use one at a time as being in a group together emboldens all three of them. It is hard to fully describe the change, but when they are all together you can actually tell they are kids, they act like kids. Being put together is generally a reward for particularly good behavior (conditioning always works better if you mix both positive and negative reinforcement, even if they lean negative) and VERY OCCASIONALLY they are allowed things like crayons or books. Lucas has self proclaimed himself the older brother of their squad which he takes very seriously, which really doesn't mean very much besides the fact he is very loud, loves to "older sibling" brag (make stuff up haha), and thinks he is really funny. He is the one that gets the energy going in a room, and if there is a tussle it's probably his fault. Bella is a very obvious contrast to that, she is quiet and would much rather go with the flow of whatever is happening than take charge like Lucas. However, I think she is hiding a sneaky side under there that doesn't come out very often, but if given the chance to grow up normally she would probably enjoy pranks and get away with them. She likes to draw and she likes listening to stories. She's much stronger than she looks, Lucas knows this first hand (if Doey was in a normal situation/environment he would probably know her "wrath" too.) Doey has the most noticeable shift, and it would be even more if he wasn't in his current circumstances. (I wrote a ton a ton here but I think I'll save it for a second post). It's kinda hard to explain? Big ole' "it depends" I suppose? Sometimes he is more in-line with Lucas, more mischievous and playful, liberally using his abilities to make up for their lack of playthings. Sometimes it is more like a contented air where he will just sit and listen while the other two do their own thing, but he'll still be an active part of conversation. They talk a lot, all three of them, there aren't many occasions where they can talk and feel listened to. Even Bella who is more quiet. It's the only opportunity for play they ever get, unlike some of the experiments in other sections of the building. Obviously if things are not great(tm) for one of them the energy mellows out more, but even if it isn't acknowledged they treat these opportunities like it will be the last time it ever happens. I don't even know if I answered the question right at this point T-T I have been typing and retyping this for hours at this point. It's like, I know it but I don't know how to say it. They act like siblings, sibling who are keenly aware they are all each other has, while still being themselves as much as they can while they have the chance. Being able to all be together without having to worry if anyone is alright genuinely is a reward for them, and it just makes punishments more effective. I think they used to be more reserved, especially Doey who is very keenly aware of being observed like 24/7, but it wasn't worth caring about, they didn't have that luxury. It probably freaked the hell out of several scientists observing him who are generally more used to "Perpetual glower", or "intentionally trying to push your buttons", and on good days "quiet compliance". He got along with critters in places like the courtyard, but he was generally avoided by other toys because he is massive and scary looking, when he walks the ground literally shakes in game. It would be worth looking into more to find a less volatile way to control him, if he wasn't considered such a liability and didn't already have a body count pre-HOJ Man I hope this doesn't suck to read TwT sorry for the messy word vomit here!!

[prismalmelonman]

Touching on Gale, Wyll, and Halsin's traumas being a bit undermined in parts of the fandom

So one thing I notice on Twitter is how some people act about the bg3 characters whose abuses were perpetuated by women.

Gale specifically for this reason (but I will touch on others)bbecause I see him dismissed super often as "can't get over his ex".

But Gale's case obviously be has the line of Mystra being like "she was my muse, my teacher, and then my lover" and sure to some that's a red flag in itself (when it comes to adults I don't really give a fuck about teacher/student) but if you view it from not only Gale's own words "ive been connected with the weave for as long as i can remember"

And that doesn't distract from his genuine love of magic of course. And it also doesn't mean that he's actually been in connection with mystra for an amount of time.

However, if you ascend Gale, and he becomes a god, you get a bunch of new little things. Tara reminiscing of course, but you get a letter from Elminster, detailing that Mystra had Elminster scope out Gale when he was eight!

And sure is that pretty cool that he's a prodigy that got the attention of the goddess of magic at that age? Yes. Mystra is, however, known in forgotten Realms lore to seek young young boys who are in tune with magic to make into her chosen. And from context clues, her chosen can be anything from Elminster and Volo, dedicated wizards who try to keep things in check, etc etc. or they're somewhat of playthings to her.

Minsc also has a conversation where me mentions that weave-touched boys in his homeland were hidden away to hone their craft, then suspecting that it was because of Mystra, given Gale's case.

Gale always seems so proud that he got to bed a goddess, and on the surface, hell yeah, that's cool.

Gale continued to have her attention even as he went to Blackstaff Academy, and Mystra eventually did take him on as an apprentice directly to her, later making him her chosen, and sleeping with him.

The reason it bothers me that people dismiss all of Gale's stuff to just "he can't get over his ex" is because that's is like almost textbook grooming? She was in his life from a young age, shaping and moulding him up as he grew up to be her perfect chosen, rewarding him by sleeping with him, and so on. And then of course casting him away when he has his folly with the netherese orb (and to be fair, it very well could have looked like to her that he was trying to seize the power himself and yes the orb does siphon off weave. That is a problem for the mistress of the weave yes).

But she also tells gale to KILL HIMSELF for her forgiveness.

Gale is much more than "unable to be over his ex" this woman was in his life since he was a kid. She's almost all he has ever known. If course it's going to be difficult for him to 1. Say no to her. 2. Get over the fact that he's lost someone that he spent his literal entire life dedicated to. Honestly if asked, I don't even think Gale would acknowledge or really see that what he went through was, in fact, abuse until it was spelled out in front of him. (Which does happen somewhat with the player character pleading to him that killing himself for mystra's forgiveness is actually horrific and that he should in fact be angry for how he was treated)

Similarly, and this one has been discussed a lot, Wyll and Mizora. Wyll was 17 and actively trying to help his people. 17, in a vulnerable state, willing to do anything to help and prove himself. Mizora very clearly took advantage of him, and regards him as a "pet", refers to him being "leashed", and so on. Personally, I do dislike the sexualization of their relationship, because it very much is also grooming (although a different type. Rather than manipulating and shaping his life from the ground up, she takes advantage of a vulnerable and desperate state to manipulate and contract Wyll into doing her bidding. I won't go too deep I to this one because it has been discussed to hell and back. But I did wanna touch on Wyll's situation as well.

Also, Halsin as well, though that has also been discussed in many retrospectives by a very good friend of mine. Halsin's trauma often get dismissed due to his polyamory, open sexual nature, and his own somewhat diminishing/dismissal of it, which honestly I love the representation of, cause for a while I did that with my own trauma. Halsin was a sex slave to a house of Lolth-Sworn drow, a matriarchal society, where the men are generally used as fodder or for breeding, though male Lolth-Sworn drow can be wizards and rise in the ranks if wizardry, but are limited everywhere else. (Minthara mentions that the third male, and every subsequent male child after third are killed for being"useless"). Halsin often referred to them as "hosts" rather than being captors, (though he does touch on that if the Player Character threatens to sell him back into slavery). Again, everything I'd have to say here for Halsin has entirely been discussed top to bottom by a friend, their link is below!!

Anyway, long story short, I dislike it a lot when Gale, Wyll, and Halsin's traumas and abuses get diminished, even if/when the character themself doesn't see or acknowledge the abuse in the same lens that we, the players, do.

[cuckoo-on-a-string]

"Appropriate" responses to the Gaiman issue

TLDR: This isn't a Rowling situation, be wary of internalized purity culture.

He's a predator. I'm glad a proper journalist followed up where police have failed (and possibly given victims a better footing for future charges).

But I have a problem with the knee-jerk responses targeting the fandom.

Just to clarify, I'm not talking about insulting The Predator. This is about how you treat people who have/do/will enjoy the stories that unfortunately came into the world through his keyboard.

Fans aren't intrinsically evil/uncaring for continuing to participate in associated fandoms.

This is not another Rowling situation. Why? Let me clarify. The consequences of consumption are very different. Rowling is ACTIVELY using her popularity and income as a creative to target one of the most vulnerable minorities in the world. Buying official merch/books/movie tickets prove to the powers that be that she remains a good investment, so they'll give her even more money. This perpetuates the cycle - new movie/book deals, more income, more hate, rinse and repeat.

The push to avoid Rowling's work in full is driven by the fact that she has FACED NO CONSEQUENCES and is still powered by her creative properties. It's fandom/consumers trying to bring justice.

Gaiman, on the other hand, knew he was doing bad shit on some level because he kept his abuse hidden. His status and reputation let him get close to vulnerable fans and essentially intimidate authorities from going after a celebrity. He is FACING CONSEQUENCES. I would personally like to see criminal charges brought against him, but that's out of the fandom's hands. Things we could've influenced (his Disney deal appears to have gone to shit, he's been booted from the truncated final season of GO, and there's no news on Sandman 3) are already in motion. If his publisher doesn't drop him, I'd say avoiding his future works is beyond valid (I certainly wouldn't buy them). But I'm going to watch the new season of Sandman. And once I've taken time away, I'll probably finish my active fics.

"Judging" people who still enjoy his work stems from good intentions that grew out of the fetid ground of purity culture rhetoric.

Writing fanfic and enjoying shows that are already made do not make people soulless accomplices. The idea that unproblematic stories by saintly creators are the only things you're allowed to enjoy is not only flirting with censorship, but it's also impossible.

If you think people should have nothing to do with Gaiman's works, you better throw out anything Weinstein touched. That includes Jackson's LOTR trilogy, FYI. Also, anything his company officially produced (which still gives him money in some cases) should never, ever grace your screen. That includes some of the better Stephen King adaptations, The Orphanage (which was a breakthrough Spanish-language film in Western markets), The King's Speech, The Imitation Game, Woman in Gold, Paddington, and It Follows.

If you aren't willing to publicly announce your "disappointment" in anyone who continues to enjoy any of those films, then kicking up a fuss over how other people process and interact with problematic content from a fallen celebrity who is in the process of getting his dues is pure hypocrisy.

Personally, I'm maliciously complying with Gaiman's famous quote about how once a story is out there, it doesn't belong to the author anymore. Well said, Predator, these are mine now, and I shall fuck about with them as I see fit.

Attacking or snobbishly looking down your nose at the fandom also erases YEARS of beautiful critique and thoughtful exploration of existing, acknowledged problems in works like The Sandman.

People in these parts already know how to handle complex issues in complex pieces of media. Gaiman isn't our god. His canon is not our bible. He didn't teach us morality, as is apparently the case for a lot of people who grew up reading Rowling's works as a child.

If you have a problem with the censorship comment I made, I'd like to point out at least one writer friend is LEANING INTO the fandom as a way to process their own trauma. Suffice it to say they survived a very similar situation. They see it as empowering to take the stories away from the abuser and use the characters/settings to make something new.

I get the ick. I have it right now. But I'm not burning every copy of his work I own (full disclosure I have... *checks shelves* a copy of Neverwhere and The Sandman series). Doing so is totally valid, and if that helps you process and feel better - go for it!

But this is not the same as Rowling and the only ones you hurt by declaring your "judgement" is a complex group of individuals who are able to enjoy fiction, remain aware of potential social consequences, and found a place that doesn't align with your black/white morality.

With that said, judge away! I better not see any stories from Charles Dickens, anything in anyway associated with the Weinsteins, Nickelodeon shows, Charlie Chaplin references, or Francis Ford Coppola films touch your feed. If you scratch the surface, you'll find more things to judge others for enjoying, and they will inevitably find something to judge you for, too.

[pillowspace]

HI….👉👈 AM I ALLOWED TO ASK ABOUT YOUR SIBLINGS AU????

sooo so curious if you have an facts or tidbits to share like! whats their dynamic like? is there any Backstory to this oooor just for fun? i am. very very interested ehe

(only if u want to tho!!)

(About this post and this post)

Mmmm! Let me see what I can think of!

Mal's full first name is Maldu. I imagine everyone would call them Mal except for Odile, since she calls Bonnie Boniface, and would presumably call Mal "Maldu."

Mal is like 12-15, I'm not really strict on the exact age. Since Mal would be the second youngest, they would probably like following Bonnie around even if Mal doesn't really know how to "play" or anything. They just kinda... stand there and try to curiously mirror whatever Bonnie does.

Mal is a bit quiet. They can speak, but they don't do so often, and are more likely to speak when they're upset than when they're pleased.

The red star that hangs from their bandana cannot be seen in colour unless Mal is especially upset. Not the most upset of their life like Siffrin, but even just a big cry could cause the star to shine for everyone to see.

Mal is very sensitive and cries easily. Siffrin's grown practiced at calming them down but still gets freaked out by the sudden tears.

Mal likes quietly watching and listening. They enjoy being taught by their allies how to perform certain tasks, and will give that wide-eyed look of a silent "really??" when praised for doing something right. They soak up praise like a sponge due to a perpetual feeling of doing something wrong.

While their right eye spirals, Mal's left iris is entirely white! It's usually covered by the slanted hat, however.

And! I hadn't actually really thought of a backstory until just now, but does this work? I think it maybe could

Siffrin accidentally created Mal through Wish Craft when he had a mental breakdown as a child/teen soon after the northern island's disappearance, though neither of them know this, and they did not meet until a couple years after this happened. Mal's existence slowly came to be with a clear understanding that they existed for a reason, but they weren't sure why. When Siffrin and Mal eventually crossed paths, it was like finding a second half that you hadn't even realized you had lost. Though even after meeting, the two are still unsure of how this happened to begin with. As far as Siffrin's concerned, the two just "clicked," and does not remember the breakdown. Meanwhile Mal's not really sure where they came from or what they are, but they gladly latch onto the protection Siffrin offers.

Mal is simultaneously an extension of Siffrin, and a separate being entirely. Mal was made from Siffrin's soul, even if Siffrin hadn't meant to share himself like that. When one is hurt, the other shares the echoes of their pain. Mal likely severely panicked when Siffrin lost the eye, and the echoing pain in Mal's own head surely didn't help. If ONE panicked kid (Bonnie) wasn't enough, you also get TWO in this AU! Congrats!

Since Mal was created from Siffrin's distraught state, it reflects through Mal in certain ways. How sensitive they are, how timid they are, their unease, their anxiety, etc. Siffrin's helping Mal every step of the way though, and is very protective of them, urging his allies to be gentle with them.

[barufisher]

i do think that for me personally. there is no version of taash's storyline that i can get down with except one where they reconnect with their qunari side. my main problem with their arc is that it perpetuates this idea that someone has to "choose" one culture, that they have to turn their back on parts of their identity in order to be the right kind of trans (the white western kind) and all of it just makes me so viscerally uncomfortable. and to be clear this is not me like... trying to make anyone feel bad, there are parts of taash's story that i personally connect with as well, like there is nothing wrong with the way taash does gender in general and there's nothing wrong with it resonating with people. it's when we put it all together in context within the game that it becomes a problem for me.

we know the qun does not have the same ideas around gender as the rest of thedas, we know that their identity, including gender, is connected to their duty. and so it doesn't make sense that taash's mother cares about them wearing dresses. why would she care about that. i'd ask if we've ever even seen any qunari in dresses but i'm pretty sure we've only seen three qunari women total and two of them are in veilguard and are scholars wearing what i personally consider a robe. the third is in trespasser and is ben-hassrath, and is definitely not wearing a dress. if anything, their mother should be concerned about the fact that they fight, since the whole point of leaving for rivain was to avoid taash being designated as a soldier. and to be fair, we get this a Little bit with the fire-breathing. but everything else about shathann's disapproval doesn't make sense in-universe.

and we also already know about the aqun athlok, which shathann even tries to bring up but the game shouts her down because....? i get that shathann is meant to be overbearing and kinda shitty, but this is not the way to do it. all this does is imply that aqun athlok is "wrong" and not as progressive as this other identity that rook has to teach taash about (and that also isnt even specific to rivain, or related to them connecting to their rivaini culture. it's the shadow dragons that teach them all of this along with rook. in general transness and the nonbinary identity are not integrated into the world in any meaningful way which makes it feel even worse). there are various cultures that have their own specific gender identities that do not adhere to the gender binary, and taash should have been given the chance to connect to their own culture in this way. and even if they really wanted to make it so taash just didn’t feel right with aqun athlok, that identity still should have been properly discussed as an option and handled with respect, rather than so carelessly thrown aside as “wrong” (though again not a depiction i would personally like but it would still be better than what we got).

and just. i really disagree with the idea that gender identity under the qun is More Rigid than elsewhere. it’s different, as we know from comments from iron bull and sten-- and we could argue in circles about inconsistencies with the things they say, obviously there have been retcons previously in an attempt to better develop the qunari beyond what we see in origins and da2, but i think this kind of development is a good thing, and is exactly why the regression with taash irritates me so much-- but when we look back at characters like warden tabris, dorian and his father and tevinter's obsession with bloodlines, the entire experience of playing f!hawke in da2 (and also da2 literally has a whole subplot about women being murdered for like 3 years and no one cares. these games just have a misogyny problem lol) and even tarquin in veilguard commenting about how his father forced him into being a soldier because he's a man(!!)-- there is a lot of rigidity, expectations, and violence around gender throughout thedas. but for some reason these rigid gender ideals and a lot of this gendered violence is held up as the status quo and not challenged at all by the writers in the way the qun repeatedly is. the exception being dorian (though you're still incentivized to forgive his father), but a lot of the characters in tevinter-- magisters, templars, the literal black divine-- are still allowed complexities and to be the good guys working with the shadow dragons, a grace not given to any qunari character besides iron bull (who ultimately still has to leave the qun or die later). i’m not trying argue that the qun is perfect and can never be criticized-- i like the flawed characters and societies within dragon age. but the qunari also deserve to be given the same depth, complexities, and engagement as everyone else, too. and it’s worth pointing out that it’s always the qun that’s depicted as backwards for the same harmful “rigidity” every other culture in the game reinforces.

and ultimately with the way the game inserts this very modern, anachronistic, and condescending language in a poor attempt to be as "correct" as possible to "teach" the player, while simultaneously writing such a careless, racist arc about their culture kinda just , makes me feel like they were actually trying to imply that one identity is more correct and progressive than the other. or, if nothing else, it's a bias that got amplified due to their unwillingness or inability to engage with taash's character beyond using them as a mouthpiece for corporate "representation."

there absolutely are people out there that are like taash, who don't necessarily have or want a connection with certain parts of their culture, and maybe they do identify closer with one aspect of it over another. this is all fine! this happens in real life, everyone has different relationships with their identity and heritage, there is no universal experience, and people are allowed to write about their own. but the thing is. this is dragon age. and taash was written by weekes. and both dragon age as a whole and weekes specifically has a repeated pattern of racist writing when it comes to depicting the qunari. and taash's quest along with the way the antaam are portrayed-- faceless, voiceless, basically naked bodies for you to kill-- makes this a series of poor choices that i don't feel generous enough to excuse.

and it sucks. so bad. that this happened. i want to like taash so bad. but.... man.

anyways if you read this far you should read this article, which is far more eloquent than anything i could write and really dives into the whole "civilized versus savage" binary that we see in a lot of fantasy RPGs and is really epitomized in taash's quest-- in dragon age, it's always the qunari and dalish elves versus a (usually white and/or human) andrastian:

[hughjidiot]

No but for real, the lore drop for Ragatha in episode five explains so much about how and why she acts the way she does. Long ramble incoming.

The fact that Ragatha's mother was, at the very least, verbally and emotionally abusive, puts all of Ragatha's behavior in the Circus into perspective.

From the very first episode we see that Ragatha is a positive, upbeat person. When Pomni arrives, Ragatha immediately takes her under her wing to try and ease the transition into this new world. This continues into the next episodes: she tries to hype Pomni up for their adventures in the Candy Kingdom and Mildenhall Manor, and shows concern both times when she goes missing. This even extends to the other members of the Circus: she's on friendly terms with Kinger and Zooble, and stands up for Gangle against Jax's bullying. It's clear that Ragatha is making an effort to be completely unlike her mother: kind, caring, positive and supportive.

However, this insistence on being positive all the time comes with it's own issues. It's not that Ragatha isn't a kind and caring person, because she absolutely is. The problem is how that's all she's allowed herself to be seen as. As Gangle and Jax observed in episodes four and five respectively, Ragatha's constant positivity even in the face of their nightmarish circumstances makes her cheerfulness come of as performative and disingenuous, even if that isn't her intention. It makes it hard for others to gauge just how genuine Ragatha's positivity truly is.

Then there's her need for validation. We see this as early as episode two: when talking to Kinger when Pomni is still missing, Ragatha talks about how rough Pomni's first day was, then admits "I don't think she really likes me that much." Then in episode four, while under the effects of the stupid sauce, she admits that she doesn't want Jax to hate her, even after openly saying that she hates him. We can infer that Ragatha didn't get much love, if any, from her mother, and now she seeks that approval from others and thinks that just being unlike her mother is the way to do it.

The issue there is that she's approaching friendship as if it were something transactional: be nice to people, they'll be nice back, and everyone can be friends. Whereas genuine friendship is formed by opening up and forming a bond with others through commonalities and shared interests. Take Gangle and Pomni: they both like Ragatha well enough, but neither of them are really friends with her. Meanwhile, Gangle and Zooble are friends thanks to their shared interests in the arts and mutual dislike of Jax. And episode five has Pomni start to form a friendship with Jax when he starts showing a less abrasive side during the slower-paced adventures.

Speaking of episode five, there's Ragatha's reaction to Pomni and Jax's budding friendship. Her expression during the bar scene is one of shock and disbelief that Jax of all people - abrasive, loudmouth, bullying Jax - is able to start earning Pomni's friendship before she can, even after showing Pomni nothing but kindness and support. It flies in the face of everything she's trying to accomplish by being everything that her mother wasn't. The end of episode five shows the result of Ragatha's constant forced positivity: Jax and Pomni go off together, as do Gangle, Zooble and Kinger, leaving Ragatha alone without anyone to truly call a friend.

Still, her situation isn't completely hopeless. As stated, the others do like Ragatha well enough - even Jax doesn't completely hate her. Pomni even tried to reach out during episode five's softball game by telling Ragatha that it's okay to let her negative emotions out, showing that Pomni does care about her. The potential is there for Ragatha to grow out of her mindset of perpetual positivity, be more honest with her emotions and form a genuine friendship with Pomni and the other players.

Or maybe Gooseworx will punch us in the gut and have Ragatha snap and abstract from the despair of being alone and the realization that all of her positivity has amounted to nothing. Guess we'll just have to wait and see.

[miharuhebinata]

do you mean twilight princess, in which she held a sword exactly once in a flashback and pretty much immediately dropped it in surrender? or wind waker, where she forgets how to use a sword the second she turns into princess zelda until literally the final battle 🤔? and i genuinely can't think of whatever other time you're referring to that she apparently uses a sword. spirit tracks? ok i'll give you that one, i guess, because phantom zelda is pretty badass, but other than that.........??

"ummm actually it's a good thing that zelda plays differently from link, because link has the triforce of courage so of course he fights and uses swords! meanwhile zelda has the triforce of wisdom, so obviously she's going to find more clever ways to solve her problems teehee ;)" hey did you guys know you can still be excited for the game while also acknowledging it's pretty fucking shitty of nintendo to act like zelda is incapable of picking up a sword in a mainline game.

[remembrancer-of-heresy]

POV: You are a perpetual and you had a long term romance with one of the primarchs (something between 100 – 150 years). Although the relationship proved itself useful and even pleasant while it lasted, you ultimately grew weary of your partner('s antics) and are now actively ghosting him. The question is... How well will he take you disappearing on him like that?

Tag List: @kit-williams, @druidwolf21

I thought about this question for a long time. I think it doesn't matter whether the reader is a perpetula or not. What matters is that she leaves the primarch.

The best reactions would be from Vulkan, Jaghatai Khan, Corvus Corax and Rogal Dorn.

Vulkan will be sad about your choice to leave him. But he loves and respects you, so he lets you go. Jaghatai Khan hates himself most of all for the fact that Chogoris joined the Imperium. For choosing slavery over freedom. So he decides that you also chose freedom.

Corvus Corax also loves and respects you. However, this does not mean that it will not affect him. Most likely, he will fall into an even deeper depression from what a monster he is. Rogal Dorn will accept your decision with all the fortitude he has. But it is unlikely that he will open his heart to anyone again. Perhaps he still believes that you will return to him.

Alpharius and Omegon would also most likely not resist your wishes. They would not try to bring you back. If you want to break off relations, then fine. But that does not mean that they want to break off… yes, they do not interfere with your life. But that is because they carefully monitor you and do everything to make sure that you live comfortably.

Magnus the Red, Sanguinius and Roboute Guilliman. I do not think they will like it. Most likely, they will try to bring you back and as gently as possible. They will try to talk to you, find out what the reason is.

Horus Lupercal, Fulgrim and Lorgar. Just like the previous primarchs, they will try to bring you back as gently as possible. Only there will be much more manipulation. Oh, they will use their charisma of the primarch to the maximum.

Leman Russ, Ferrus Manus and Lion El'Johnson. They will simply bring you back. They will not touch, they will not arrange manipulations. They will just wait for you to stop acting like a crazy cat and understand that you will be better off with them.

Perturabo and Konrad Curze. Not only will they be angry, hurt and horrified by your departure. Not only will they kidnap you. They will lock you in four walls. They will torture you psychologically. Maybe even physically. You belong only to them. You must love them as they love you. Leaving them would be the biggest mistake of your life.

Angron and Mortarion. Like the previous primarchs, they will kidnap you and lock you in a room. But their approach is completely different. Angron will ignore you for the most part. Sometimes he will come into the room and stare for a long time. He made you his slave, although he hates slavery. And yet he cannot allow you to leave him. You are his salvation. The best thing that has ever happened to him. The entire Imperium will burn, but you will not leave it.

Mortarion will often visit you and cry. Ask why you left him. He will promise to be a better man. Just don't leave him okay? The whole ship is trash, a rotting wound and waste. You're in this wonderful room like a fairy in the Garden of Eden. He doesn't deserve you. But he needs you. Let him be near you.

[rcmclachlan]

sentences saturday sunday

I was tagged by @beanarie and @leashybebes yesterday and @firehose118 and @zeraparker today. Thanks, y'all!

I've been struggling to write over the last couple of weeks (not that I've really had the time to sit down and actually make the attempt), but I started fucking around with something on my phone a couple of days ago. Not sure if I'll continue it or if I'm just vibing with another idea for an alien invasion canon AU that will desert me like all the others.

+

"Romania? Who goes to Romania first when Los Angeles is right here?"

Tommy doesn't answer. Even if he did, he'd have to somehow talk around the fist he's had pressed to his mouth for the last two hours. His knuckles are so white that Buck isn't sure there's actually any blood left in his hands.

Ever since Eddie called them out of the blue around 1:30 in the morning, waking Buck from a dream in which he was trying to escape a dollhouse that was guarded by fire ants with peacock tails, he's been glued to the television in the living room. Every channel is showing the same thing: an enormous something hovering in the sky over Calafat that is unlike anything Buck's ever seen.

It looks like a stack of lenticular clouds made of mercury, rippling like someone's skipping stones across its surface. Maybe it's a crosswind. Maybe it's some sort of magnetic field helping to keep the thing afloat. Maybe it's some sort of frequency communicating with the tiny pointy ships that drift idly around the craft the way oxpeckers flock around elephants in search of parasites.

Buck would be a liar if he said he never thought about life elsewhere in the universe. Despite the fact that Chimney thinks he'd never heard of Steven Spielberg until he and Tommy made Buck watch Close Encounters of the Third Kind, he grew up watching E.T. Although it didn't have nearly as much of an impact as Ancient Aliens did. The documentary lived in a perpetual state of rewatch on the Buckley family TiVo until he left for college. He devoured every conspiracy theory YouTube had to offer during his downtime at the ranch.

One of the customers he made approximately 200 pink squirrels for in Peru had a UFO sighting story that Buck made her retell every time she came to the bar with her scandalously younger husband. It was obvious what she'd seen had been someone coordinating drones in the desert, but every time she told the story, it grew more and more outlandish until, by the time he was packing up to go to LA, not only had she seen a UFO but she'd made first contact just outside of La Quinta. 

He's fallen down so many Wikipedia rabbit holes that he truly understands that the requirements for complex life are many and often coincidental, which makes earth exceedingly unusual as far as anyone's aware. But he's also taken Chris to the Griffith enough times to have a good grasp on how just big the universe is. The idea that they're alone in the great vastness of space is not only improbable, but arrogant. And stupid.

Although if they ever found evidence of extraterrestrial life during his lifetime, he expected it to be something like weird microplankton in Europa's subterranean ocean that he'd read about in a NASA press release, not watch it drop out of the sky live on channel 5 while Chris Schauble keeps fumbling whatever it says on the teleprompter.

"Where do you think they're from, though? God, can you imagine how long it took them to get here? Maybe they're part of some intergalactic consortium thing. Like, the Space U.N. Maybe they're here to invite us to join," Buck muses, texting another fifty exclamation points into the 118 group chat, where the memes have been coming in hot and fast. Chim had been on top with the Will Smith one until Hen obliterated them all with the claw machine aliens from Toy Story.

He looks over at Tommy, who's still doing his best impression of The Thinker. The actual statue has probably moved more than Tommy has in the past two hours.

"Hey, you good?" He's not really expecting an answer. He hasn't gotten one the first dozen times he's asked. Checking in every so often just seems like the polite thing to do at this point. "Seriously, though. After you made me watch that movie where what's-her-name goes on a beach walk with her dad in space, I figured you'd be thrilled about this. Maybe they're here to build one of those machines. Maybe we're all gonna go surfing on Vega."

+

Tagging @geddyqueer, @liminalmemories21, @setmeatopthepyre, @alchemistc, @screamlet, @dadvans, @harmless-variety-of-garden-snake, @newtkelly, @epiphainie, and @station18908

[itsa-me-lily]

First: How sfw/nsfw are we allowed to go with asks and whatnot, as well as stuff you won't write? I'm not intending on sending anything crazy, I just don't wanna cross boundaries

Second: Every guy in my family (minus one), married in or born in, is/was military, and I have heard that it's not uncommon for military spouses to cheat on their partner, especially when deployed. I'm not saying dear reader is cheating or anything of the sort, but I could def see some fresh dumbass recruits trying to pull the legendary Lieutenant's wife, if only for bragging rights. Curious how that would shake out (would the recruits ever be seen again, who knows!)

TLDR for the first part, I'm okay with NSFW asks and you can find my list of no goes (as well as the master list for Military Program Spouse) Here

Here is the Simon & Thimble playlist

Now for the second part

Content Warning; Discussion of size (kind of), discussions of cheating (kind of) (please let me know if I'm missing anything)

Also Reader is fat, like size 18/20 pants, like there's a jiggle no matter what she's doing (remember kids fat isn't a dirty word what size you are doesn't define your morality, your actions do)

Also also please know that my brain does not want to let go of Reader telling Simon "well we wouldn't be in this situation if you could pull bitches" but I don't think it's going to fit in this

Honestly the sex talk had gone better than you had anticipated. In the past when you had tried to explain being demisexual and what that meant for your sexual attraction to other people you'd gotten blank stares, been told you were just picky or that you were just talking about a crush that everyone got. You knew it wasn't, but it got old fast. And while Simon stared as you explained yourself, he didn't push or tell you that it was some new made up sexuality.

It was refreshing.

You weren't even that offended when Simon had stated he had no interest of sleeping with you. You'd come to accept that you weren't everyone's cup of tea, not everyone liked a little jiggle in the wiggle. So you'd be two people who legally shared the last name, roommates, broskis if you will.

You'd agreed that any extramarital activities had to be respectful, discreet, and that if it turned serious divorce was an option on the table. Or well, you listed out your ideas in what you thought was a logical manner and Simon just listened before grunting what you thought was an affirmative and then turning on the TV for some sort of sports game. You were a theater kid growing up, you weren't a fan of sport ball. So the two of you started your married lives with the ever perpetual hall pass.

Not that you ever used yours. Again there was the fact that you only felt any real attraction or desire once you had gotten to know someone, felt a connection that...intrigued your soul for lack of better phrasing. And you are a very self sufficient woman. People weren't typically banging down your door to...well bang, so really you just went about your days.

It was probably why you hadn't noticed the recruit flirting with you at first. At first it was just a polite nod and acknowledgement of who you were when you had to come to base to fill out paperwork. Then there were the times you'd run into him while walking through the neighborhoods. Private (or was he Second Private? You never really paid attention) Pearson was alright, a pretty boy who seemed to know it, given how he seemed to preen with attention once you caught on to what was happening. Yeah he was alright but nothing that really wanted to make you deal with the headache of dealing with two men in your life. Plus you were pretty sure he had mentioned something about working with Simon? You were not a person who shit where you ate.

So you played dumb when he tried to flirt with you, and never took him up on any offers to 'help' you around the house or to show you how to use the gym equipment, after hours of course. The cockiest had to have been when he offered to help you 'stretch' any time. The smile he wore when he offered that one was so slimy you felt like you needed a shower after.

It all came to a head one day in the mailroom. Somehow a random package had been delivered to the house instead of on base, and since Simon was out doing god knows what somewhere in the world it wasn't like he could take it with him. So you were doing your good deed of the day and dropping it off. Only to run into Pearson, who was with friends...even better.

You had tried to just smile politely and wave, acting like you were in the middle of running Very Important Errands. It didn't help much. Pearson and Co still came up to you like you were all the best of friends, Pearson even being so bold as to drape an arm across your shoulders, or he tried you. You side stepped him easily enough to his annoyance.

You lightly chit chatted, looking for an opening to excuse yourself. You'd be blunt if you had to, but you really didn't want to deal with any back lash for being a 'bitch'. Though maybe you should have. He must have sensed your deep rooted desire to get the fuck out of there, because Pearson put on the grosses looking grin, leaning in as if to share a secret.

"The boys and I were going to go out for some drinks tonight. Why don't you come with us? Promise we don't bite."

The last part was whispered liked it was a promise of the opposite. You honestly wanted to barf. A) Drinking wasn't really your scene. B) Pearson definitely wasn't your scene.

"As tempting as that sounds, sorry boys. I uh- I don't drink."

"Oh come on pretty girl, one drink won't hurt you."

You wanted to roll your eyes as Pearson tried to tempt you out, reaching to tuck a piece of hair behind your ear. Thankfully you had heard little rumors that maybe the 141 was coming home. Simon wouldn't mind you using him as an excuse...probably.

"Really I can't. Simon should be coming home soon and I still have things I want to take care of before he's back."

Maybe it was the threat of their CO being back that caused all of them to freeze for a moment, giving you the opening to slip out from their little triangle they made, making your way to the exit. Pearson must have really been desperate, or just that stupid to practically shout after you.

"Come on, you really can't enjoy him more than me right? Doubt he's really all that great and impressive."

Oh that stopped you in your tracks. Simon Riley was a lot of things, annoying, stubborn, an asshole, rude, louder than the fucking heavens when he snored, a person who didn't care if he used up all the hot water, one could even say he was creepy at times. He didn't open up about things, and acted like socializing was the bane of his existence.

He had a sense of humor that people seldom understood, but he still entertained himself. Scared you half to death dozens of times over with how fucking quiet he was, like he was appearing out of thin air, but he'd try to knock to catch your attention if you were in the bedroom or bathroom. Had what was probably a herculean amount of strength in a single bear paw of his, but you'd seen him try to offer a finger for Tombo to sniff when the little curly mop got curious.

You plastered on the biggest polite smile you had, the one that boarder lined on looking a little crazy with how much it stretched your mouth, and spun on your feet to look at the trio of men who really tried to try you this day.

"You all know my husband."

You didn't actually wait for a response as you walked back to the men, who all started to look like they were regretting their choices.

"Lieutenant Riley. You know, Lieutenant "built like a brick shit house" Riley."

You stopped directly in front of Pearson, hands on your hips as you met his stare straight on, before looking him up and down slowly.

"Really what makes you think you can...measure up?"

The scrunch of your face at the end made it very clear that you had decided that the younger man was severely 'lacking' when it came to any kind of measuring. Clearly none of them had expected you to react like this, given that they just stared gobsmacked as you shrugged and waved them good bye with the tips of your fingers, happily making a sassy exit to your freedom.

Simon Riley was a lot of things, and he was your husband. And no one talked shit about your husband except you.

Edit;

There's a second part I want to add to this that I'll probably work on this weekend. I'm very out of the habit of writing so it takes me a hot minute to get stuff down the way I want it. Anyway I hope you like this! And remember

A) Being Fat doesn't make you good or bad

B) I am a greedy greedy goblin who loves getting asks

[angelsdean]

I agree with your Mary posts! I also think Dean asking her to "be a mom" in that scene is not about wanting her to baby them but simply just wanting her to choose her sons over the organization that let one of its members literally torture and r*pe Sam only a few episodes before that!

Literally Dean is so very clear in that scene that what he's upset abt is her choosing the BMOL over them. Not abt her not "parenting" them or playing "mommy." He's just upset that she doesn't seem to want to be around them, and that she instead has been working with their enemies. And even if that wasn't her intention, even if she was in fact doing it "for" them and trying to protect them by working with the enemy they're still allowed to be hurt by her decision.

She tells them that she's been struggling, trying to play three decades of catch up and Dean tells her they have been struggling too. They have been grieving her their whole lives. But now that she's here they want her there. She's finally alive, they finally have a chance to be together, and she keeps leaving. And that hurts. But he also understands and sympathizes. He tells her, "You said that you needed time. No, you said you need space. So we gave you your space." They have been patient with her. Dean understands very well needing time and space to process things. But what hurts is that, from his perspective, it seems like she is choosing anyone but them. So when he says, "No, you needed space from us," and when she says she's "trying" and he cuts in with "How 'bout for once, you just try to be a mom?" IMO it's less about wanting her to "mother" them and play mommy and more about wanting her to be present in their lives, to choose them, to unconditionally love and support them and shoulder some of the pain and burdens they have been carrying on their own their whole lives. He wants, for once, to have a parent that CHOOSES him over the "mission." Like, don't people think that maybe seeing another parent walk out on him and choose hunting / work over being present in his life is a little bit upsetting / salting old wounds?

Anyways, I love Mary, though some may think it's a hashtag Crime to sympathize with Dean in this scene but like ??? Some people are projecting a lot of stuff Dean did not say or express in that scene. His upset and main criticism is about her choosing the BMOL over them, that's made clear in this exchange:

Dean: So between us and them – Mary: It's not like that. Dean: Yeah, Mary, it is. And you made your choice. So there's the door.

It's not about wanting her to play some "mom" role as if they were children. He wants her to choose them over their adversaries, and to be around them, get to know them, something both Dean and Sam want to do.

Anyways, I am always saying I would have loved more from this arc esp re: Mary's grief over losing her "babies." I think a lot of what Mary's feeling would've hit harder if they'd showed us more of her grief. (The "I need you to see me" scene hits so good for me bc it's tied up with this complicated grief. Mary finally acknowledging that adult Dean IS her baby. Truly SEEING him, instead of the perpetual 4 yr old that lives in her mind). But I don't blame her for wanting / needing space to process (deancoded!) or for throwing herself into hunting to Cope (john-and-sam coded!). Or for struggling with her identity in this new life. I enjoy all the tension and her being flawed and real and messy.

[lesbianalanwake]

Severance S2E4. bro what the fuck:

–Kier Eagan’s fake-ass made-up twin brother……….

–flipping from claustrophobia to agoraphobia on a dime in a frozen doppelganger fever dream. you want to see the fallout from reintegration? well fuck you, it's a slow process, and you have wait for it. you want to see the outside world? well here it is. in the most disorienting way and place possible. a mirror to S2E1 - not letting the audience get any solid footing or sense of direction, experiencing the same disorientation that the innies do. a rat-in-a-maze bottle episode where you don't see the outside world, except they ARE outside, and yet they're not. Lumon trying to absorb and rewrite the narrative - you're outside but on our terms.

–once again obsessed with the pacing. a growing uncomfortable tension, Lumon trying to drive a wedge between MDR (intentionally AND unintentionally…. Helena…..), something that could have stretched out for several more episodes or even a season, but Irving said “nah” and ripped the band-aid clean off to clear the way. like Mark abruptly accelerating via reintegration at the end of the previous episode. has a metatextual feeling to it…. if Lumon is trying to tug the narrative in a certain direction, then MDR, inside and out, is grabbing it and YANKING it in another.

–Helena having sex with Mark…. fucked up, in many ways rape by deception using Helly’s identity, taking advantage of not one but TWO people, but the second person is the same person as Helena with the same brain and body, but also NOT the same, but yes the same, but-..… Helena perpetuating what is expected of her by her family/company, the Board saying to give Mark “what he wants, including Helly R” because Helena is another kind of cog in the machine to be taken advantage of as the company sees fit. cycles upon cycles, cruelty begetting cruelty. ethical violations in the workplace the likes of which have never been seen.

(and the quiet part getting real loud now, with the implication that the waffle party ends with sex.)

but also. deeply funny that they listened to a campfire horror story/morality tale about how sexual urges are bad, made fun of it, and went “anyway……” comedy/tragedy two sides of the same coin etc.

–Helena isn't happy! everything she says is double-edged - playing a role (for Lumon, for MDR) and yet completely sincere (she hated reciting the nine principles - sorry dad!, she doesn't like who she is on the outside, she thinks the Kier mythology is ridiculous, etc - expressing herself only through performance). she questions and doubts but has buried it so deep that it only comes out in Helly R, except now it's starting to come out in Helena too. I wonder if Irving trying to kill Helena is going to do 90% of the work in radicalizing her, because she's playacting at love and friendship, and the cracks in the Eagan conditioning are starting to show (lying and obfuscating and yet! sincere in her own demented way), but her little overtures into affection are still deeply off and wrong and causing strife (even when she doesn't mean to) and perpetuating what she knows - smiling violence and power struggle is the language she grew up with, and Irving is speaking that language to tell her that her methods aren't working, that she can't keep pretending to have the life she wants, that it's going to take more than that. and the fact that Helena and Irving Bailiff are the same, sending their innies down to the severed floor with a purpose, while “Helly” and Irving B are being cagey about what they saw on the outside….. doppelgangers and foils.

–WOE! I wonder if Irving B connecting the dots through a dream is more of Irving Bailiff leaking through, since he would know who Helena Eagan is. just like his automatic military response to being stranded in the wilderness - survival-focused, on the defensive, much more physical and violent. reintegration but a second secret kind (taking sleep deprivation to new heights).

–the doppelganger animatronic (?) of Helly had a crooked neck, calling back to her attempt to hang herself, but it was a message directed at Helena…. and we didn't see Irving's doppelganger pointing the way on its own, just as part of the group…. much to think about.

–Miss Huang’s little “pretty cool, right?” made me sad….. so childlike for a second, like she should be. girl we're getting you out of there.

–the fact that Mark and Dylan and Irving have never seen fire, and barely seen the sky (and Helly still hasn't seen any of it). let alone all of the other weird shit going on…. the behind the scenes bit talked about Lumon wanting to scare the hell out of MDR, and yeah…. yeah.

–the fact that we don't see the immediate aftermath of Mark reintegrating but do see Mark S having Mark Scout hair here and there, and one crazy flash to his other self. something to be said about how Mark S exists because Mark doesn't give a shit about himself, and he's never really thought of his severed self as someone separate (and they're not, really, except they are, and aren't, and are, and aren't, and-). and Mark S doing something for himself, not for his outie, something that distinguishes him from Mark Scout, but it turns out to be awful in the end…… oof ouch. MUCH to think about.

–I think I’ll need to see the follow-up before I decide how I feel about this episode. it did a LOT, and it needs the fallout to contextualize it. leaning pretty hard on making the story fit the idea to have the corporate retreat, but I can forgive that because it was gorgeous to look at, and I'm obsessed with the idea of a disorienting switch to an agoraphobic vista that nevertheless remains a claustrophobic trap, and team-building retreat that leaves the team in shambles is really good.

–"I'm on the ice," Gemma, "Chikhai Bardo" as an episode title, etc.... they're building up to some real undead and rebirth shit, and I'm starting to think Kier Eagan's frozen fucking Disney head isn't a joke.....

[miwiheroes]

Dropping Byler Evidence Every Day Until Season 5

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ Day 12: End of Season 3 pt 3/3 . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

PLEASE READ PART ONE AND TWO !!!

Finally, I get to talk about Hopper's monologue at the end of season 3, because this is where it really does come together. I think that this scene is perfect to set up the storyline that happens in season 4. In S4 we see that Mike doesn't want to say I love you to El, and it's in a much more incriminating way than it is presented to be in season 3. Mike's just had his realisation that he's gay, right? And so in this scene with the monologue, we find out that this realisation must have something to do with Will, based on parallels and the arc throughout S3.

Right off the bat, I need to clarify that when other characters' monologues are a voiceover to a bunch of shots, they are supposed to be an ironic mirror of what that character is feeling. Just in case anyone tries to tell me that it's just a coincidence that Hopper's lines are placed over shots of Mike here.

1. Feelings. Jesus. The truth is, for so long I'd forgotten what those even were. I've been stuck in one place. In a cave, you might say. A deep, dark cave.

This quote from Hopper I rarely see us talk about, rather focusing on the rest of the speech. These words are obviously supposed to be, at face value, about Hopper's own emotions and arc. Under the surface, this is also about Mike. Throughout the season, he's been confused about his feelings. We see this in the way he blurted out I love her in the cabin, we see this when he then tries to get El to say it for him on multiple occasions, and finally when she says it back and he looks super confused.

So basically here, these words mean that Mike had kind of forgotten what real feelings are supposed to be like. He's just realised that something is off, and when El said I love you too, he realised his own feelings aren't real. Mike has been lying to himself for a long time, but for the first time, he's letting himself think about his real feelings towards Will, which is why he looks so traumatised when he hugs his mom later (we will get to that obviously)

Being "stuck in one place" and a "deep, dark cave", must mean something like trying to be close minded to reality. Mike, throughout the season, has been stuck in this weird place with El where he's trying so hard to feel one thing, but not realising that he's allowed to feel something else.

2. But lately, I guess I've been feeling... distant from you. Like you're pulling away from me or something. I miss playing board games every night.

This is not just about the rest of the friends seeing their best friends move away because the camera zooms in on MIKE ALONE. They can't make this shit obvious enough. This shows that these words are coming from his own thoughts.

This is perfect for going into S4, BECAUSE we literally get told that Mike really did think that Will was going to pull away from him when he moved. He thinks that he 'lost' him. Throughout S3, they went through this whole arc that was literally all about pulling away from each other's friendship as a result of Mike being a little too obsessed with El.

The 'I miss playing board games every night' is so a reference to DND, it's too close not to be. We have never seen on screen El and Hopper playing board games, and the fact the camera just zoomed so far in on Mike means it has to be about Mike and Will.

This perpetuates that same idea that I've talk about before about DND and 'childish' things being a stand-in for Mike's feelings about Will. It was what they did together when they were closest, and in S3, Mike's tried so hard to grow up and continue into this straight relationship in order to do so, while Will just wants to be himself. This is a direct reference as well to what Mike says about not being able to play games for the rest of their lives.

Here, it's almost like Mike has realised I do miss playing DND with you, and he's realised he does want the same thing that Will had wanted. But it's too late, because Will's now 'pulling away' from him.

3. But I know you're getting older, growing, changing. And, I guess, if I'm being really honest, that's what scares me. I don't want things to change.

ITS INSANEEEE WORK THAT THEY CUT TO MIKE ON THE WORD "CHANGING" LIKE CMON

It kind of acknowledges how much Mike has changed ever since S2 ended. Ever since he got into his relationship with El, he's not been himself, the Mike that a lot of the audience have very very vocally missed. What this also does is give us insight into how Mike feels about his relationship with both Will and El.

His relationship with El in S3 was something easy and safe for him. Throughout summer, before the Mindflayer stuff happened, his relationship with El was fine. He could deal with this because he can still go to movie theatres with Will and his friends and El can't go out in public. His relationship isn't real, and the fights they have are just 'silly, stupid fights'.

But now that El has said 'I love you' he realised he never really wanted this relationship and that's a change from the norm. He's scared about the future and living his life knowing how he really feels, without being able to deny it.

He LOOKS BACK AT WILL'S HOUSE !!! what else could this mean, like, El never really lived there so why would it be about her. It's definitely him thinking about how he's scared things will change between him and Will and this means the realisation he had must be about Will. This is further cemented by the fact the camera CUTS TO WILL in the car, showing that he also feels the same way, even though Mike doesn't know that.

4. So I think maybe that's why I came in here, to try to maybe...stop that change. To turn back the clock. To make things go back to how they were.

Whenever Mike is comforted by his mother, it is about Will. This is a direct parallel to when Mike thought that Will had died in season 1, and should make the audience think back to that. Up until this point in S3 that was the only time he was seen hugging her like this in their house, and both times it was because he was LOSING WILL.

Both hugs may I add are wordless. Mike never really needs to say that this is about Will without his mom knowing anyway, because she knows how important he is to him.

Okay, so onto the way that Mike is standing and his sort of demeanour in this part. He seems super numb here, like he's completely shellshocked. I would understand feeling upset because both El and Will have left, but it's clear that he has just realised something huge. Like the directors really are trying to tell you how Mike has just got his world ROCKED bro like he's just had a realisation that will definitely CHANGE his life.

'To make things go back to the way they were' - this is interesting because in S3, we have been shown this sentiment with Will, not Mike, and yet the voiceover is on Mike here and is clearly showing his inner conflict. So we know now that the reason Will was feeling like this was because he was in love with him, so couldn't the same be said for Mike? In truth, Mike doesn't want to grow up. He's felt forced to do so. This could also be him thinking he would prefer to leave behind his realisation and live in blissful unawareness.

Therefore...

Given the whole end of S3, it's pretty safe to assume that:

Mike doesn't want to lose Will to any other friends, as when Will promises him that it's 'not possible' he'd make any friends as special as Mike, he looks very happy.

Mike doesn't want to say I love you to El and tries his best to make her say it for him. When she says I love you back, he doesn't look shocked or happy, erasing the possibility that he didn't want to say it because he was nervous she wouldn't say it back.

Mike realises the mistakes he's made the whole season right at the end, meaning it's too late for him. He's realised that he's been trying to repress something for Will. This sets up the storyline for S4 where he clearly knows he doesn't love El, whereas in S3 he doesn't know that's such an issue. He's realised he never wanted things to change between him and Will, just like Will wanted in S3.

Mike seeks comfort from his mom, who is always the person he has sought comfort from after he thinks he has lost Will, and wishes to go back to how things were when they were kids.

It's a pretty obvious gay realisation. It has been done countless times in various queer shows that just have the privilege of being less popular than ST so the people watching are more likely to accept it.