#so that’s really cool. if you like saw and musicals they’re having shows in

[warriors-ideas]

oooh i agree with the ship names. saw does this too and it's really neat.

but we're keeping darksol as a ship name because it's funny.

Saw ship names and revengeshipping were actually the reasons why I put -shipping at the end of the idea ship name LOL, but yeah I do think darksol is a silly name. It’s like when you’re trying to remember the word for eclipse but you can’t remember so you say “uh. Weird sun. Darksol? Something like that.” which I feel probably encapsulates the ship in a way.

[sigma-alpha-writer-chad]

Grow Up, Would You? [Josh Washington]

“I don’t know if you’ve changed any since middle school but I really hope you’ve learned the difference between pranking somebody and just being a fucking bully.”

You can also find this story on Ao3!

Prologue / Chapter One / Chapter Two

[Italicized chapters are sort of like,, flash backs? Stuff in the past, whatever.]

[CHAPTER ONE]

I’d never been one for parties.

Yet there I stood, staring up at the house of the address I was given, the windows flashing a multitude of colors as the muffled music blared. People were scattered around the front lawn, holding their drinks and talking happily amongst themselves as laughter filled the cool night air. I felt a sense of midding as I slowly made my way to the front door, a small smile formed on my face.

I opened the front door to be met with the loud, hot air of the party. It wasn’t packed, but it was close. Immediately I started looking around for the one who invited me, gently pushing my way through the groups of people. There were faces I recognized, and ones I didn’t. I hadn’t seen anyone in the area since I’d changed schools years prior. But none of them were who I was searching for. Until finally, I saw him.

He was tall, with blonde hair and blue eyes behind a pair of thick black rectangular glasses. He wore a dark green sweater that fit his broad shoulders snugly and blue jeans. I especially knew it was him when I spotted his hiking shoes.

Who wears hiking shoes to a party?

“Chris!” I called. M y cousin, Christopher Hartley, leaning up against the wall and talking to a girl with red hair. He turned to me and smiled.

“Jordan! I didn’t think you’d show,” he said. He took a step towards me and pull ed me into a tight, familiar hug. Chris took a step back as if to get a better look at me. “You look great!”

“Yeah, well, y’know,” I grinned. I tucked a hair behind my ear. It was Chris’s friend group’s graduation party, and it was a big one. A smaller celebration had been held prior by the adults for Chris , a nice outdoor barbecue with baby photos tacked onto the walls and various cork boards. But once that was over and everyone had left, Chris begged me to go with him to a much larger, run by the teens grad party the next week.

“Let me introduce you to my friends!” Chris was practically yelling into my ear to be heard over the blasting music.

“Uhm, no! I’m good, actually, I’ve met your friends!” I’ d met his friends. Mean girls, meat-heads, and -

“C’mon, Jordan, please! You haven’t seen them in like 4 years, they’re totally new people now!” Chris insisted. He grabbed my wrist and began to pull me back towards the red-haired girl. I recognized her then.

“Hi, Ashley,” I waved meekly.

Ashley Brown. Despite the people she surrounded herself with, Ashley seemed like a nice girl. She had red shoulder length hair and hazel eyes under thin eyebrows. Her makeup was subtle and suited her well. She was a very conventionally pretty girl and one that Chris had a huge crush on. Even back in elementary school I remembered seeing her and Chris, nervously sitting together at lunch. Their crushes on each other were so obviously mutual it was sickening to know they were both oblivious to the other’s feelings.

“Hey, Jordan.” Ashley smiled sweetly and waved back at me before glancing back at Chris with a look that screamed “get me out of this.” I decided to get her out of the situation myself while escaping the prospects of having to re meet Chris’s friends. As far as I knew, the group was entirely made up of the same people as it was when I’d changed schools 4 years prior. “Actually Chris, I’m going to go…” I paused. “To the bathroom.”

“But you just got here,” Chris’s face dropped. He knew me well enough to know I was just making an excuse.

“I drink a lot of water, and -”

“Jordan. Don’t ditch me,” Chris said. “Please.” At that moment I despised him for being a sweetheart. I couldn’t say no to Chris, no matter how much I’d wanted to.

Chris spent the next hour or so introducing me to his posse. Just as I’d suspected, it was exactly the same as it had been previously. Emily Davis, Jessica Riley, Matthew Taylor, Michael Monroe, Samantha Giddings, and Hannah and Beth Washington. I noticed there was one missing, but I didn’t dare ask in fear of reminding Chris of th at final person.

“ Sam seems nice,” I commented. “She’s probably my favorite out of everybody that you’ve introduced me to.” And I wasn’t lying. Sam stuck out like a sore thumb compared to the people she ran with. She was active, vegan – not passive-aggressive.

“Yeah, Sam’s great. Hey, I’m going to grab a drink. Do you want something?”

“A water bottle?” Chris gave me a look.

“Really?” I nodded and he left to go get the beverages, leaving me by myself near a fireplace. I took a moment to really look around at the house I was in. It was large, just short of a mansion, and old. The architecture was somewhat gothic.

“ BOO!” I nearly jumped out of my skin at the sudden scare. Someone had grabbed my shoulders hard as they shouted into my ear. I knew immediately who it was, and I was as far from happy as someone could have ever possibly been. I heard a familiar laughter as I turned around to face him, taking deep and steady breaths.

“Joshua Washington,” I said blankly. “Still fail to grow up?” Josh’s smile fades.

“Whatever your name is,” Josh repeated my tone. I couldn’t tell whether or not he had actually forgotten my name or didn’t care to use It. “Still can’t take a joke?”

“Guess not,” I shrugged. Josh stared at me, his shit-eating grin slowly returning to his face. “Or maybe you should come up with some new jokes. ‘Boo’? So last year.” I held eye contact with Joshua for what felt like an hour.

“An oldie but a goodie.” Josh’s brow twitches in frustration. He still held onto his smile but I could tell it was a struggle.

���Not a goodie if nobody fucking likes it.”

“I like it.”

“Hey, Josh! I see you’ve re-met Jordan!” Chris chimed in. Whether he knew we were about to start fighting or not was a mystery, but I was grateful for the interruption nonetheless.

“ Right, Jordan, that’s what it was,” Josh said. “I didn’t remember her at all other than the amount of crying she did.”

“The amount of crying you made me do.”

“All in good fun.”

“You tried to get pig’s blood to ‘Carrie’ me.”

“Like I said, just jokes.” Chris finally interjected.

“C’mon, Jordan, he didn’t mean anything by -” I hold my hand up to stop Chris there.

“I’m not doing this. You were in on a lot of those, Chris, you know how they hurt me.” I didn’t expect him to be on Josh’s side, but then again it wasn’t that surprising considering the amount of torture he helped exact. Chris looked down at the floor in defeat. I turn to Josh.

“I don’t know if you’ve changed any since middle school but I really hope you’ve learned the difference between pranking somebody and just being a fucking bully.” I huffed at him. I could barely see him under all of the lights but I managed to catch a glimpse of expression other than snark. For half of a second I could’ve sworn it was remorse.

It didn’t last.

“ Well. I’m not a bully, so… whatever.” Josh turned around and walked away, leaving Chris and I. I was shocked to look at Chris and see him glaring at me.

“Did you have to do that?” He asked. I raise my eyebrows in surprise.

“Do what?”

“Start a fight, just like that?” I could feel my heart sink.

“Chris, no, I didn’t -”

“Why can’t you just get over it already?” I could smell the booze on Chris’s breath. I knew he was drunk, he didn’t mean it. He couldn’t. He watched me cry enough growing up to know what kind of effects Joshua Washington had on me and my mental health. I chose to say nothing, my eyes full of tears threatening to spill over. My throat felt tight, and I knew if I said a word, all eyes would be on me as I cried in the middle of the room. So I just shake my head and shrug. I took my water bottle and headed out onto the back porch of the house – where Hannah and Beth Washington happened to be.

They noticed right away that my expression was negative. Something I’d apparently forgotten was how different from their brother the twins were, as they came to me immediately.

“What’s wrong? What happened?” Hannah asked as she took my hands into her own. I swallowed.

“I don’t really want to talk about it,” I sighed, looking over the balcony and into the woods.

“Was it Josh?” Beth asked. My eyes flickered to hers. My silence was all the answer that she’d needed. “He’s an ass, for sure. But he’s not as bad as he makes himself out to be. When it comes to you we don’t know what’s wrong with him.” I’m surprised at what Beth was saying. “Have you heard that dumb stuff about ‘he’s only making fun of you because he likes you’ from, like, grade school? I think it’s like that.”

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes at that. The twins ignore the obvious attitude and continued to chat with me. There was absolutely no way Joshua harbored any feelings for me other than disdain, and there was no way in HELL that it could have ever been romantic.

“Girl, don’t worry. You can hang with us.” Hannah grinned at me as she hopped excitedly. “He’ll leave you alone if we tell him to, or whatever.” I smiled at the girls. Just as I had with Chris, I could smell the booze on them and could only assume this kindness and promise of friendship was temporary. Once they were sober, they wouldn’t remember this at all. And if they did, I was sure they would regret it.

“Sure, that would be nice,” I admitted. Even if it’s just for the night, I would never complain about having friends – even if they were related to my sworn enemy.

“Great! Give me your phone!” Hannah insisted. I did as she’d asked, and next thing I knew I had their contact information. “We’ll hang out after tonight, we promise.” I nodded. I would be lying if I said that I hadn’t hoped it would happen, that these two would somehow integrate me into their lives.

It was severely unfortunate that it didn’t last long.

[squinch-depraved]

CAN U DO COOL SEXY HOT READER TAKES SCHLATTS VIRGINITY?! but aged down like they’re both in college together

this one had me giggling and kicking my feet when i received it

reader and schlatt are both 20 (my age :3) (ok so i have/will never go to college so i hope this makes sense also lc!schlatt because he will not leave my brain)

CW: breeding kink if u squint, does this count as corruption kink? idk

you had a few classes together, ended up being partners for a project

actually got along surprisingly well

hung out a few times a week for a month or two

and then it was more frequent

almost every day this dude would just show up at your apartment; you have no idea how he came to know your schedule

if it wasn't him you'd be scared

and like, it's not because he doesn't look scary- he does, he's tall as fuck and has this serial killer stare

but you're not afraid of him because every time he's around you he acts like a complete loser

he stares at you when he thinks you aren't looking, a look of obsession in his eyes

the focus he has on your reflection as you put on lip gloss in the mirror is unmatched in any of his classes

you were supposed to be going to a party together, evident by your outfit that he can't decide if he likes or not- it shows a lot of skin, and while that'd be fine if it was just you two, there's bound to be lots of other guys eyeing you up all night

and he just can't stand the thought of that!

so what is he to do but fake receiving a text saying some faculty were crashing the event and it would be best to stay home?

and you were astounded at this boy's nerve, you got this dressed up? you looked this good? and he pretends the function's cancelled?

but you go along with it, pretending to be bummed out, playing his little game with him

"damn. was really hoping to get some dick tonight," you sigh

his brain kinda short circuits

and he mumbles something

hook, line, and

"what? sorry, i couldn't hear you, the music's loud," you tilt your head, turning down the volume

"i said i'm right here."

sinker :)

you snort derisively at him

"what makes you think i want you?"

you two had talked a lot in the months you had known each other, and sex came up a few times

you knew (before even talking to him) that he was a virgin

and he knew (before even talking to you) that you were a slut

but god, he needed you the second he saw you- needed you to be his first. his only.

so he swallows his pride and looks up at you from his spot on your floor with the most pitiful eyes

"i don't think you want me. i think i want you and you need a service for the night."

"a service?? jesus, schlatt, don't kid yourself. you wouldn't be doing shit, i'd be the one doing all the work because you have no clue what you're doing."

"then teach me," he begs. his voice is like you've never heard it before, whiny and breathy

and you roll your eyes before giving in, reaching a hand down to help him up

you guide him to lay down on your bed and he just sits there all tense, unable to relax because he's so nervous

until you tell him to take his pants off

and he's tearing them over his thighs, and they're down on the floor

and the tent in his boxers?

jesus christ

you figured he would be on the bigger side, but he looked massive, and you couldn't even clearly see his length yet

you sit there for a bit, taking in the sight of him splayed out amongst your stuffed animals

only hot bitches have stuffies on their beds, btw

and his face is sooo red, his breathing is uneven, his eyes are running all over your body

"have you like... ever been touched?" you ask him, unsure of how gentle you need to be

but gentle is not what he wants, not at all

"yeah. just... not all the way."

he can't meet your eyes now

so you smirk and climb over to him, hopping on top of him and savoring the whimper he lets out when you sit down on his clothed bulge

"and you want me to be your first time going all the way?"

you use one finger to tilt his chin to look at you

and he just melts

nodding while he stares into your eyes with pure adoration

the eye contact is intense, you find it hard to tear your gaze from his

but eventually you lean in and kiss him, taking his head in your hands

schlatt moans into your mouth when you slide your tongue in, giving in completely and letting you explore his mouth

and when you bite his bottom lip slightly when you pull away?

he moans sooo sluttily

you're grinding down onto his lap at this point, enjoying the constant noises the friction pulls from his lips

he's fucking mortified but he has to grab your hips super tightly and try to get you to stop

because if you keep going like this, he's gonna finish in his boxers and he thinks he would have to leave and never see you again if that happened

so you take pity on him, stopping your movements to press kisses to his neck

which he finds out he also loves

"is it okay if i leave marks?" you whisper in his ear

and his dick throbs so hard

"please," he responds in a quiet voice, staring at the ceiling while he pictures his friends seeing the evidence of him fucking the hottest person on campus

you oblige wayyy too eagerly, biting down hard and sucking deep purple marks all over his exposed neck

only pulling away when he was littered with dark bruises and teeth marks

the whole time he was letting out the cutest noises, gasping and groaning and sputtering how good you felt

silly boy, he has no idea what he's in for

once you're done having fun marking your territory, you scoot back and peel his boxers off

and you try not to react, but your eyes widen at the sight of his cock springing up and smacking his abdomen

he takes in your hungry expression and mistakes it for something negative

"what? wha's wrong?"

he sounds so scared

it takes you a few gruelling seconds before you shake your head and respond

"nothing, just. holy shit," you mumble

"what???" schlatt asks, sitting up slightly

"you're fucking huge, dude!! that's all, jesus... i just needed a second to process, sorry."

ego boosted

you will never hear the end of that

but anyways

he stutters, unable to finish whatever he was saying when you take him in your hand and stroke him gently

your eyes are trained on his groin, his on your face while you greedily watch as you play with him

he's so fucking loud

bucking his hips up into your hand

you're barely doing anything, he's that desperate for your touch

when you take his tip in your mouth, he lets out a strained gasp and tries to cover his mouth with his hand

you laugh mockingly and pull it from his face

"i wanna hear you!! this isn't as fun if i don't get to hear those pathetic noises you keep making," you tease

he just groans, eyes fluttering, and tilts his head back, giving in to how good you're making him feel

you smile at him and take as much of him into your mouth as you can, plunging him deep into your throat and making sloppy noises as you suck on him

he sounds like a fucking WHORE, whining and fucking up into your face

you let him have his fun, but pull off when he starts breathing a lot faster

he opens his eyes in surprise and cries out at the loss of contact, chest heaving

"why the fuck would you stop???"

he's so desperate, it's adorable

"can't have you cumming down my throat, then i can't ride you, can i?"

you raise one brow as you ask him, and he reaches his hand to hold yours subconsciously

a glance at his large fingers intertwining with yours stirs something in your stomach and you realize for the first time that you're really enjoying this

"please..." he trails off, unsure of what he's asking for

you watch his face for a moment, inspecting his needy expression, and decide to take pity on him

he watches you so intensely as you take off your jean shorts

and nearly creams himself when you just rip a hole in your fishnets instead of properly taking them off

and the seconds are dragging by so slowly as you position yourself on top of him

until you meet his eyes, asking for permission, and he nods vigorously

and you just sink down onto him, plunging his entire length between your velvet walls

schlatt's eyes glaze over as he stares up at you; he's never felt anything so good

you give him a few minutes to take in how soft you are on the inside before starting to move your hips

he groans with every bounce, so loud that you make a mental note to apologize to your roommate later in case they're home and hearing this

"you can touch me, y'know? you don't gotta just lay there and take it," you pant as you work masterfully on top of him

a more passionate grunt than usual leaves his lips and he immediately snakes his hands up to rest on your ass, squeezing and kneading it like he's holding on for dear life

and, maybe he feels like he is. you're riding him so fucking well that he swears he's dreaming, and his grip on your behind may well be the only thing keeping him grounded

it doesn't take long before he tells you what you had expected, but what he adds at the end throws you for a loop

"i'm gonna cum, but please, please don't stop. just keep going, i can go a few more rounds. please, y/n, i'm begging you," he stutters out

you clench around him and he yells, nails leaving deep angry crescent marks in the flesh of your rear end as he paints your insides white

about a minute later, he catches his breath somewhat and asks, "can i fuck you now?"

he sounds so sweet

like he really wants to make you feel good

so you let him try, positioning yourself on your hands and knees in front of him so that he can hit from behind

takes him a second to get the position right but he slides right in and starts going at you hard

you can't help the moans that slip out, and every noise you make spurs him on to keep going harder, faster, deeper

he's trying so hard to make you cum, you can tell, but he's so inexperienced that he finishes in you again before he can get you anywhere close

so when he lets out a frustrated, "fuck!" you reach behind you to grab his hand and bring it around to your front, lining his fingers up with your clit

"feel that? that's what you're looking for," you pant, pushing your ass as flush against him as you could. "play with it, see if you can figure it out on your own, and it's okay if you can't, i'm here to teach you."

he lets out a deep breath and starts thrusting again, rubbing circles into your sensitive nub

you continue to let out noises so he knows what works for you and what doesn't, and you've gotta hand it to him, he's a really fast learner

because it takes like five minutes before him slamming into you combined with the pattern of figure-eights he settled on tracing on your clit makes you cum

you get unbelievably tight around him as you climax, and the sound of you screaming his name makes his eyes roll back into his head while he spills in you one final time

you collapse when he pulls out, instructing him to help you to the bathroom

gotta teach him the importance of aftercare, right?

so he picks you up and carries you to the toilet, setting you down gently on your feet before stepping out and closing the door behind him to give you your privacy

best believe he stays right outside the door, though

he's not going anywhere for a long time. you're his now

[srjlvr]

꒦꒷ enhypen ! and your infamous ship with them<3

idol-ot7!enhypen x idol-fem!reader .. fluff .. no warnings<3 not proofread!!

read pt.1 here!! — since you all liked it<3

ε ї з — heeseung

as if his heart eyes for you at the interview weren’t enough, heeseung started talking about you a lot in his lives, which only adds to your fan’s delusions.

he’d go on and talk about his day in his lives when all of a sudden he’d turn on some music and the first song he’d pick would be one of your songs.

“this song is so good, i listen to it almost every day, this artist y/n is really talented i really love her songs” he’d say with a big smile.

and oh, this is definitely not the end, he’d also go on and rant about the first time meeting you and tell them about those times when you bumped into each other, as if he’s telling his best friend about a new crush he has.

“i was walking down the aisle when i accidentally bumped into her, she was in a bit rush so she apologized quickly and ran away, it was so funny i didn’t know what to do” he’d giggle, “after that she saw me again and even got me a snack, that’s cute”

with delusional fans, comes the delusional tweets of fans, and the conspiracies about heeseung having a crush too (which might be true)

“if i wasn’t so sure before, now im more than 100% sure that this boy is having a crush on her, and i’m all in for it!!”

ε ї з — jay

a week after the valentine’s day story blew up, jay went on a live again, just casually talking with his fans that he loves and appreciates so much.

jay was ranting about a cake his mom made him,and explained how cool the design she did looked, to the point where he actually took his phone and scrolled through his gallery to show them a picture.

usually, when idols show their phones on lives or such, they’d turn off their notifications, only this time jay was so into it that he forgot to do it.

at the same time you, being the good old friend you are, responded to a text he sent you a few minutes ago, even before he started the live.

as he was showing his picture on his phone to the fans he also got a notification from you, it was a matter of a few seconds for fans to realize your contact name, and a few seconds for jay to realize he’s doomed.

jay tried to laugh it off but it was too late. now even those who didn’t ship you two and had doubts about it are left speechless.

“i admit i didn’t believe the valentine’s day story and their ship, but now knowing they text each other and probably do every day too? YES!!”

ε ї з — jake

your old meet up with jake was actually filmed for a short vlog, you both work under the same company so it was pretty common to meet up and get it filmed.

a few days after the scandal blew up, a really short vlog of the both of you got released.

fans rushed to watch it and see any clue of jake since it was rumored he was going to be there. the short film got around 100k+ in no time!

fans felt like swooning whenever they watched your interactions, you and jake even spoke in english, considering the fact that you both are foreigners and feel comfortable speaking in english.

jake never looked more shy than when he was literally standing next to you, holding his signed album and just waiting for the right moment to give it to you.

if you’d ask any fan that watched this short vlog, they’d probably tell you they’re 100% sure that something is up with the both of you. the way that he looked at you was something fans never saw before, and the way that you looked at him was as if you finally got to talk with your crush after years of crushing over him.

“i NEVER thought i’d be able to see both of my ults in one frame together!! i bet you a million dollars that they’re dating and fight me if they’re not!! it seemed like they tried to hide it but it looked too overact”

ε ї з — sunghoon

everyone’s favorite ambassadors!! your couple photoshoot got so famous that even people who never heard of the two of you refused to believe you’re not dating.

on your first photoshoot together, you and sunghoon did some funny tiktok challenges that got super famous to the point that people started making edits out of them.

ever since then, each time you’d see each other you’d make a tiktok together, wether it’s a dance challenge or just a very trendy tiktok hence, it wasn’t such a surprised that enhypen’s tiktok account and your tiktok account was filled with tiktoks of the both of you together.

fans brought up new conspiracies of the both of you going on short dates and filming tiktoks together, a whole new chaos was created.

if you thought these tiktoks were enough then think again because not only your tiktok was filled with the both of you, but you also made sure to take many many photos and post it on instagram.

i think out of all ships, yours and sunghoons shippers are being fed so well honestly and they never ever complain about it.

“i never heard about these two until i saw their photoshoots!! you can’t tell me they’re not dating?? and we get too many contents of them two im fully convinced they’re just dropping hints”

ε ї з — sunoo

new years awards came in fast, and all fans were looking forward to collab stages, it was rumored that a lot of 3rd gen and 4th gen are going to perform together, but fans never ever expected you and sunoo to be on one stage together.

him dancing to your performance in one award got so famous that fans even made memes about it, like “me when my favorite song is playing in one store” and more!

the thing is, this stage included only you and him, which made the fans go even more crazy. you and sunoo? on one stage? all alone? fans hoped so bad for that and it happened.

you and sunoo ate the performance, it included a lot of skinship and difficult moves that even fans who tried to cover the collab stage complained about it being really hard.

a stage between a female idol and male idol isn’t something that’s very popular lately (sadly!!!) so it was such a surprise that you and sunoo actually did it.

king and queen of kpop confirmed! your new ship nickname was formed in no time and other fans who watched your stage was mesmerized by how good you two look together.

“IM GOING CRAZY RN!! sunoo and y/n, boyfriend and girlfriend on one stage AND THEY ATE THAT PERFORMANCE!! imagine being on stage with your partner they’re so iconic for that!!”

ε ї з — jungwon

as weeks went by with you and jungwon being MCs, fans got used to see the both of you together every week, it became a routine for them to open their laptop and stream your live, they’ll always find the time to watch the two of you.

when your contract ended, fans were devastated and didn’t want to move on, they even considered to stop watching the show without having the two of you.

even in your last day, you and jungwon looked so sad and unmotivated which made fans even more sad than before. the memories you created will always stay in the show’s history and fans’ hearts.

i guess both of your fans got super lucky because your companies were smart enough to sign the both of you up to a new variety show!!

new content of the both of you together?? in one variety show?? your fans can’t be thankful enough honestly.

fans were going mad watching the both of you being too comfortable around each other, basically doing everything together and staying really close to each other.

“anyone else waiting for them to accidentally expose their relationship on this variety show? come on!! its too obvious they’re dating!!”

ε ї з — riki

ever since that time the both of you met accidentally, the coffee shop became super famous, mostly people who waits to catch the both of you together are going there.

ever since then, fate has its own ways of getting to you, and each time you’re going to buy coffee in local stores, you happen to see him too.

you once uploaded a photo of your coffee to your weverse account and fans noticed a very familiar figure, who just happened to upload a photo of his coffee with you in the background.

and if that wasn’t enough, you were caught by fans together in the same place and this time, even shared a really long conversation. it became a usual thing for the both of you to meet up whenever you’re off to buy coffee, as if you know where to go if you want to meet up.

fans refuse to believe that this is all a coincidence since the evidences are always there, you’ve been seen around each other too many times, even in photos you yourself uploaded.

at one point you just decided to upload a photo together and tease your fans a bit, and it actually worked because the next day you became trending as the coffee couple.

“coffee couple has done it again! do you think their dates must have coffee in it? like what if they go to watch a movie? popcorn and coffee? anyways im fully convinced they’re always planning it and we’re just here to watch”

••• copyright © srjlvr all rights are reserved.

PERM TAG-LIST ; @sungwhoonz @ohdudehesflirting @unlikelysublimekryptonite @deobiis @manooffline @miumiuoi @in-somnias-world @filmofhybe @wonbinsnovia @daegutowns @aurumiee @soobywon @dhriti-stories @ariadores @firstclassjaylee @watamotee33 @moons-v @s00buwu @hoonheepretty @lovelovelovebts (bold means cannot be tagged)

[valeriehalla]

I don’t know what to do about the internet. It’s getting worse, and getting worse faster than I think any of us ever could have imagined even just six years ago. Tumblr shot itself in the heart at the behest of Apple, at the behest of whichever nameless evangelical finance perverts are in charge of credit card policy, whereupon people like me (artists and people who like art) fled in droves to Twitter, the present state of which I don’t have it in me to be funny about.

Even after that one-two punch, Twitter and Tumblr are still the only (major) social media platforms I can stand to use. I mean, they’re the last ones left where you can, for example, see posts that your friends have made. I might have said that that seemed like the whole point of social media; every digital elsewhere has now collectively agreed that it is, in fact, social media’s greatest flaw. Your friends like to hang out and post weird jokes and titty drawings — they don’t know the first thing about your favorite marketing trends, let alone your unslakable thirst for 30-second phone videos. We have to move on: I’ll die if I think about it.

Uh — I wanna let you in a little. Here’s where I’m at, okay? I’m working on this project. I like it a lot: it’s a writing thing and an art thing and a music thing all at the same time. I’m still struggling with art burnout, but every day I get to sit down and write or compose for this thing is an unending delight, so on the balance it’s been great to work on. It’s taken me a while to get here, though — I’ve blown past all my estimates about when it’d be done. Still, it won’t be much longer.

In the mean time, I keep having these compulsive worries. I feel that I should be posting, but the nature of a long-form project like this is that I don’t have anything to post. I tweet complete nothings now and then, as if to announce my presence, like a lighthouse pulsing in the distance. And every week the websites get worse. They’re bleeding out, and it feels like some of my blood’s in there, maybe. Like, maybe you’d call me naïve, but it wasn’t that long ago that I really, really liked all this online stuff. I never had the hustle culture mindset about it: by good luck alone I managed to make a living posting the stuff I wanted to post on the places I wanted to post it.

The places I liked to post don’t exist anymore. My experience of using the internet feels hostile, alien. The ground beneath all our feet feels eggshell-thin.

But I have to use the internet: it’s where my stuff goes. It’s where all of you are. Here is where art and artists and art-likers live.

The things I love live here, in precarity, as the saw blades and lava traps of our digital dungeon grow every day more numerous.

Anyway, what I’m saying is that the web sucks now, but as long as we’re here — and we will be here — I want to try loving it again anyway. I want to untangle myself from all this disappointment and expectation and try simply “vibing” again. I wanna use cohost more: I’ll even crosspost stuff to Tumblr like I keep saying I should. I’m making a cool thing and I should show it off! I should relearn how to draw a little doodle and post it without feeling like it’s a suboptimal use of my time or whatever!! I want to believe in what joy may find us, though our world be a dumpster.

[scramratz]

Rant abt your Cds I'm curious

OK HERE GOES SCRAMS 2024 CD COLLECTION TIER LIST

(Disclaimer: these are just my personal opinions and if yours differ from mine, fine. It’s not a sin to be wrong)

S TIER-

Goo-Sonic Youth: Straight bangers all the way through. Girls love it when you show them your Sonic Youth cd. Extra points cuz the pamphlet unfolds into a sick poster

Midnight Vultures-Beck: Good album to clean the house to. Every song a banger. Beck as a person sets off alarms, though 🤔

Vivadixiesubmarinetransmissionplot-Sparklehorse: Genuinely my favorite artist and album of all time. Fall asleep to Homecoming Queen often.

Siamese Dream-Smashing Pumpkins: Fire straight though. Good when you’re in a depressed 20-something mood. Better than Mellon Collie in my humble opinion.

Gorillaz-Gorillaz: The start of one of my favorite bands and objectively one of the best bands in the world don’t fight me on it I’ll kill you.

A TIER-

Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots-The Flaming Lips: Solid album. Iconic cover art. “Do You Realize??” always got me feeling feelings

Violent Femmes-Violent Femmes: Top 3 favorite band. Every song went platinum in my household. Would have been higher but reminds me of my mom too much.

Dig Me Out- Sleater-Kinney: Got it because the name sounded familiar. Ended up loving them! Doesn’t sound right if it’s not played loud, though, and considering I live in an apartment, I don’t play it often.

Fear Yourself-Daniel Johnston: Got it because I love “Hi, How Are You” but haven’t been able to find it anywhere. Was pleasantly surprised! Hits the same melancholy spot but slightly more upbeat.

Figure 8-Elliot Smith: My favorite sad boy that definitely DIDN’T kill himself. Not my favorite Elliot album but every one of his albums is A tier personally.

The Diary of Alicia Keys-Alicia Keys: WENT QUADRUPLE PLATINUM IN OUR HOUSEHOLD. Prime cleaning the house on Sunday music. Dragon Days is seriously underrated.

Garbage-Garbage: Don’t know how to say this without sounding insane but this album sounds like the color #DC007F and I like that color a lot

2-Mac Demarco: The CHOKEHOLD Mac Demarco had on us artschool bitches in 2016 OMG. Was gonna change my name to Viceroy

B TIER-

Money for Nothing- Dire Straits: Top tier dad music.

Lumine fever- The Adrenals: Got it cuz the cover looked cool. Was pleasantly surprised! They rock the adequate amount

Rocket to Russia- Ramones: They’re good but I don’t get the hype honestly. They’re the Flavor-Aid of Punk

Starfish- The Church: Only love one song on it, the only song anyone likes tbh. The rest are your standard 80s deal

Crooked Rain-Pavement: I really love Pavement but there is a thing as too much Pavement and I think I’ve reached it

Yankee Hotel Foxtrot-Wilco: Honestly should have been in A tier but all the pretentious music dudes I’ve met has soured this album for me so it goes in B outta spite. Jesus Etc my fave song tho

An Evening with Silk Sonic- Silk Sonic: Nice, short, gets me in a happy mood. Does what it needs to do!

Prolonging the Magic- Cake: John McCrea don’t really be singing, do he? He just fancy talkin

C TIER-

Gigantic, Fuel, and The Nixons: I got all 3 on sale and they all sound the same and that sound is…ok? Like it’s alright background music

Blind Melon-Blind Melon: What was with 90’s bands putting random kids as their album covers? Decent listen, though.

Summerteeth-Wilco: Good background music. I can’t remember any songs off it.

Los Angeles/Wild Gift-X: I like X but I hate that fucking album art omg it’s so hard to look at. I like their songs individually but as a cohesive album, eh.

D TIER-

Throwing Copper-Live: bought it on sale with the above 3 but liked this one substantially less. Only redeeming quality to me is the album art.

Ben Folds Five-Ben Folds Five: Misleading considering there’s only 3 of them. He sounds like my ex boyfriend from highschool before I realized I liked girls

F Tier-

The Ragetones/Fall Apart-The Ragetones: Saw them play at a shitting basement show. Everything sounds better when you can barely hear yourself think.

F Punk-Big Audio Dynamite: Found it at the thrift and rehomed it outta pity. Sounds like the 80s in a bad way.

[nvrsaidiwasinurcloset]

Ethan Landry x Reader second chance trope?? They can be at a party since there obviously still in the same friend group w the group and they take there anger they’ve been keeping in out on eachother by sex. But after the get back tg obvi xxx🩷

I wanted to post this last night but my melatonin kicked in and the words I was typing made zero sense haha. I hope you like it!

New Perspective - Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader

This contains SMUT - Minors DNI

Summary: After your breakup with Ethan, you run into him at a party after avoiding him for months.

Contains: Mentions of a break-up, angst, underage drinking, Oral - F!Recieving, p in v sex

A/N: I hope y'all like it:) There's a ton of dialog lmao

When Ethan broke up with you, you were devastated. It was his first relationship, and he didn’t know how to work through the rough patches. He always seemed to say the wrong thing at the wrong time, and that really put a strain on things. He thought that he made you unhappy, and regardless of how much he loved you, he couldn’t put you through it anymore.

Since that night, you’ve only been around him a few times. It sucked that you had the same friend group, because you didn’t have time to grieve the loss of the relationship. You eventually became distant from your friends, not wanting to see him. He was always with Chad, and Tara always wanted Chad around. The only ones you still see on a regular basis are Mindy and Anika, and even though they’re cool with Ethan, they still were loyal to you.

When Mindy showed up to your dorm and started to beg you to come out to a party, it was the last thing you felt like doing.

“Come on, you need to get out and do something. This whole ‘moping in your room’ thing isn’t like you,” she said, flopping onto your bed.

“You know Ethan will probably be there…I’m not ready to see him,” you sighed, laying down beside her.

“Maybe it wouldn’t be the worst thing for you to see him. Maybe you could try to be friends like you were before you started dating,” Mindy suggested, “We all miss you…Ethan does, too.”

You scoffed at her words, “I highly doubt that.”

“No, seriously. He’s always asking me how you’re doing.”

You sat up and got off your bed. “Fine, I’ll go. But if it’s too hard for me to be around him, I probably won’t stay long,” you said, a smile forming on Mindy’s face.

“Yes! We’re going to have so much fun,” she looked over your appearance, “Okay, get out of the sweatpants and let’s go!”

You stopped by Anika’s dorm on the way to pick her up. She was beaming the second she saw you.

“Ahhh I’m so excited you’re going to the party!” she squealed. You giggled at her enthusiasm.

“I told Mindy that I might not stay long,” you said, as you started the walk to the frat house.

“Even if we only get you for a little bit, that’s all that matters.”

The bass from the music in the house was so loud that the sidewalk was vibrating as you walked up to the door. When you made it inside, the three of you went to the kitchen to get a drink.

“Whoa, I don’t think you need that much,” Mindy said, as you added vodka to your cup.

“I’m not going to chug it, I’m just going to sip it,” you laughed, adding some juice.

“Hey!” you heard Tara yell as she wrapped an arm around you. “I’m so happy you came.”

“How much have you had to drink?” you asked with a smile, the slight slur in her speech hinting that she’s probably had enough.

“Not that much, Chad cut me off,” she said, as he walked up beside her.

“Yeah, she gets feisty when she drinks to much,” Chad joked, as Tara nudged him. “It’s great to see you.”

“It’s nice to see you guys, too,” you said, as you looked behind him. A familiar set of brown eyes connected with yours.

Your breath hitched in your throat as he smiled, the simple action making you want to take a sip of your drink.

You turned to Mindy, “I don’t know if I’m ready for this.”

“Yes, you are. You don’t have to talk to him if you don’t want to,” she said, leading you away from him to the living room.

As you leaned against the wall with Mindy and Anika, one of the guys you recognized from your writing class came up to you.

“Hey, you want to dance?” he asked, his hand reaching out to take yours. You looked over to Mindy, her eyes encouraging you.

“Fuck it, sure,” you said, grabbing his hand.

He led you to the middle of the floor, his hands going to your waist. You didn’t even know his name; you didn’t really care. You just needed to have fun.

Ethan searched for you, wanting to talk. He saw Mindy and Anika on the other side of the room.

“Did she leave?” Ethan asked Mindy as he walked up to her.

“No, not really,” she said, as he looked in the direction she was.

His heart dropped as he watched you dance with another guy’s hands on you. He felt sick to his stomach, wishing those hands were his.

“Who’s that?” he asked, as Anika smirked.

“Why, you jealous?” she asked, as Ethan’s cheeks started to turn pink. It wasn’t obvious in the poorly lit house, which he was thankful for.

“No, I want her to be happy,” he sighed, looking back over to you.

You swayed to the music, one of your hands on his shoulder as the other held your drink. His hands kept moving, running over the curve of your ass as he pulled you closer.

“Keep your hands on my hips,” your voice was playful but stern.

“I like them where they are,” he mumbled, as his hands squeezed you.

Ethan was watching the whole interaction, fury building inside him as he watched the guy’s hands roam. He couldn’t take it anymore.

“Seriously, stop,” you said, as his body was pulled away from yours.

“Don’t touch her like that,” Ethan snapped, as the guy raised his hands.

“Sorry dude, I thought you broke up with her.”

“He did,” you said before turning to Ethan, “I can take care of myself.”

“What, I’m just supposed to be okay with another guy’s hands on you?” Ethan questioned, his eyes pleading with yours. You looked over to Mindy, a smirk on her face after watching Ethan stick up for you.

“Let’s go talk.”

You took his hand in yours and led him to one of the few vacant bedrooms upstairs, locking the door after you walked in. Your heart was pounding, but you needed to have a conversation, and didn’t want to be interrupted.

You both sat down on the edge of the bed, as you started to get mad. You’ve held in so many emotions since the breakup, and anger seemed to be the one threatening to escape.

“You do know you can’t get upset when you’re the one that gave up on us, right?” you asked, as he looked over at you.

“I didn’t want to give up, but you weren’t happy,” he sighed, looking back down to his lap.

“I was happy with you. Every relationship has their issues…you just didn’t want to work through them.”

“You didn’t make it easy, though,” he looked back up, “I think it’s best that we did break up. All we did was argue the last month we were together.”

“How can you say that’s what was best when you weren’t okay with someone else’s hands on me?” you snapped, “You can’t just not want to be with me, but not want anyone else to have me either. That’s just selfish.”

“You’re the one that’s selfish…your emotions seemed to be the only ones that mattered.”

“What the fuck, Ethan? I tried so hard to make you happy, too!” you were starting to get frustrated when you stood up, “This was a mistake. I was hoping we could at least be friends, but I don’t think that’ll work. At least not right now”

You started to open the door when Ethan pushed it shut. When you turned to face him, you could tell he was mad that you wanted to walk away.

“We’re done, remember?” you snapped, before he pushed you against the door.

“No, we aren’t.”

He leaned in, his lips connecting to yours. The kiss was needy, and very aggressive. You were whimpering, the intensity making your core throb. His tongue slipped in your mouth as one of your hands went to his hair. You felt his hands go to your hips, before going to your ass. He started to lift you, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist as he carried you over to the bed.

He pulled his shirt off after laying you down, his hands going to the hem of yours.

“Wait, do you think I’m just going to let you fuck me?” you laughed, sitting up. “I’m not going to be the girl that you dumped but you still hook up with.”

“Why are you making things so complicated?” he snapped, as your jaw dropped. “Seriously, babe. I think this is the best way for us to get the aggression out.”

His eyes were full of lust, but you saw love there, too. You weren’t sure what this meant, but you were desperate to find out. You slipped your shirt over your head and reached behind you to unhook your bra. He bit his lip as he looked at the newly exposed skin.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said, not wanting to move closer until you gave him the okay to do so.

“I thought we were getting the aggression out,” you smirked, “Come here.”

He kissed you again as his hand ran up your side. You started to giggle at the tickling sensation, until his hand made it to your breast and squeezed it. You moaned into the kiss, as his hands kept roaming your body.

He trailed kisses along your jaw and neck, gently nibbling your flesh. He smirked against you as you gasped at the feeling.

“Stop teasing me,” you whined, as he lifted his head to look at you.

“What? You don’t want me to take my time?” his tone was cocky as he watched you squirm underneath of him.

“Please don’t,” you said, as he leaned down to take one of your nipples in his mouth. His hand roamed lower as he fumbled with the button to your jeans. You reached down, unbuttoning them and shimmying them down your hips.

“Someone’s impatient,” he mumbled, sucking your other nipple into his mouth.

“Mhm,” you whimpered as he started to rub you over your panties. “Those need to go, too.”

You tried to reach down and pull them off yourself before he stopped you.

“I think I still remember how to do this,” he joked, sliding them along with your jeans the rest of the way down your legs. His lips moved further down, his eyes watching your face when he was almost where you wanted him. Your eyes started to flutter shut as your breathing got heavier in anticipation. “I want your eyes on mine, baby.”

When your eyes connected, he flicked his tongue across your clit. His tongue quickly sped up, the whimpers flooding out of your mouth getting louder. He slowed down every time your eyes started to close.

“Please don’t stop,” you whined, your hands going to his hair.

“I said to keep your eyes on mine.”

Your eyes met his again, making his mouth move faster against you. Your fingers started to gently tug on his hair, as he slipped one of his fingers inside you.

“Oh fuck,” you moaned, as he curved it just right. When he added a second one, your eyes started to shut. As hard as you tried to fight it, you couldn’t.

“You don’t want to listen, do you?” he asked, sliding his fingers out of you. You whined at the loss of contact. “I want you on all fours, baby.”

You got into the position on the bed as he slid his jeans down.

“Fuck, I don’t have a condom,” he said, his hands running over your ass. “I’m sorry, babe.”

“I thought you always kept a spare one in your wallet?” you questioned, your mind starting to wander. “Unless you used it on someone else.”

“Seriously? Is that what you think?” he asked, grabbing his phone. “Hang on, I’ll see if Chad has one.”

 “I’m on birth control. As long as you pull out, we’ll be fine,” you sighed, “but really, where did your extra condom go, Ethan?”

He lined up with your dripping entrance, gasping when he pushed the tip in.

“Stop accusing me of something you know didn’t happen,” he said, gripping your hips as he slid the rest of the way in.

“Fuck,” you whimpered at the fullness, “Did you want to see other people? Is that why you really dumped me?”

His hips started to move faster, your words pissing him off.

“I never replaced it after we fucked in my car when you went home with me for Christmas,” he mumbled, watching his cock slide in and out of your pussy. “You’re so fucking tight.”

He loved the way your ass moved when he pounded into you, feeling like he could come at the sight when your hips moved back to meet his thrusts.

Your face was pressed against the bed as one of your hands went to your clit. You rubbed fast circles as he repeatedly hit that spot inside of you.

“Ethan,” you whined, your orgasm quickly building. “I’m close.”

“Who does this pussy belong to?” he asked, his hips not slowing as you got closer and closer to falling over the edge. It was hard to form words as your hips started to jolt. “Tell me or I’ll stop.”

“It’s yours, Ethan,” you said, your face in the sheets as you tried to muffle your moans. He smiled as you said exactly what he wanted to hear.

“Don’t try to hide those pretty sounds, baby. No one can hear you over the music,” he groaned out, “I wanna hear you.”

You turned your head, the moans pouring out of your mouth getting louder and louder as your orgasm hit. His hips kept moving as he fucked you though it, your shaky hand still rubbing at your clit.

“I love it when you squeeze my cock like that,” he moaned, “I’m gonna cum, baby.”

He pulled out after a few more thrusts, shooting his cum all over your ass and lower back. You fully relaxed on the bed, drained of all your energy. Ethan caught his breath before he started to look around the room.

“Uh…I just need to find something to get this off of you,” he laughed, before noticing a box of tissues. He walked over to the dresser to grab them and saw a picture of the guy you were dancing with earlier in the night, “I think I just fucked you in your boyfriend’s bed.”

“Shut up, I don’t even know his name,” you laughed, as he cleaned his cum off you.

You slid off the bed onto your feet and grabbed your panties, slipping them back on. Ethan’s arms wrapped around you as he leaned in to kiss you.

“Do you really think I would break up with you for someone else?” he asked, “You know I love you too much to even think about anyone else, right?”

“I know you do, I was just trying to push your buttons,” you smiled, your lips pecking his.

“Can we try this again?” he asked against your lips.

You nudged him away a little, smirking at him. “Didn’t you just say we were meant to break up?”

“I think it needed to happen for us to see what we really wanted. I want to be with you,” he said, his hands reaching to grab yours, “If you’ll give me another chance.”

“As long as you promise me you’ll try to work through things with me whenever we have problems, then yes,” you smiled, as he stepped closer to kiss you again.

“I promise.”

As you walked back down to the party with Ethan, you noticed Chad and Tara at the bottom of the stairs. They were talking before Chad glanced up and saw the two of you.

“Are you guys good now?” he yelled, a blush creeping up on your cheeks as Ethan nodded. “Fuck yes. The gang is back together.”

You giggled as you made it to the bottom, Chad high-fiving Ethan to congratulate him.

“I knew you two could be friends again,” Tara said, as you looked up to Ethan.

“We’re not just friends,” Ethan smiled as he leaned down to kiss you. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” you mumbled against his lips.

[preeningpisces]

JJK Men vs. Tinder

What the men are like on Tinder! Non-Curse AU

AN: I discussed these with my sister & it’s such a fun topic. If you have any thoughts/headcanons, pls share them!

Includes: Choso, Geto, Gojo, Kenjaku, Nanami, Sukuna, Toji

Below the cut, toxic behavior, enjoy!

Choso

❥ Photos: not the best at taking photos. They’re awkward, but in an endearing way. A classic above view selfie where he tries to look neutral/cool, but it ends up looking kind of pouty and oh-so babygirl. A photo with itadori with a forced smile, and one that itadori took of him while they were at an arcade & he won a plushie from a claw machine

❥ Bio: itadori did some major editing because Choso wrote like a whole paragraph that no one wants to read

Hi! New to the dating scene. If you like video games, anime or sci-fi too then should talk🖤

❥ Opener: pretty standard, afraid of coming off like a creep because he's awkward

hi how are you?

❥ Messaging: makes you feel like you’re messaging a bot at first because his responses are pretty fast because he's eager, but also straightforward and bland because he doesn't want to say something wrong. Itadori has to come in & do damage control until Choso can see you're interested. Very much a penpal--might be a week or more before he asks you out. He's the type that wants to have an emotional connection going on a date

❥ How he asks you out: he's nervous but he's direct. Stares the phone down until you reply

I really like you and want to meet you. do you want to go on a date?

❥ First date: he’ll take you somewhere sweet and fun, like an arcade or a carnival. Having activities takes some pressure off, which helps with his nerves a lot. Googled how to act on a date, so he brings flowers - aaaaw. Pays too, even if funds are tight.

❥ If it doesn’t work out: omg having to end things will STRESS HIM THE FUCK OUT. He's going to mull over the decision for a hot minute before he does it. He's apologetic, but makes it clear that he doesn't want to see you anymore

♡ ♡ ♡

Geto

❥ Photos: the best at taking photos. They’re pretty normal for the most part, one with him petting a cat, another at a cafe with Gojo and Shoko. But he has a pretentious black & white photo of him reading a book or staring off to the side. He looks so pretty it cancels out the cringe tho

❥ Bio: keeps it simple, he believes it's better not reveal too much. That's what getting to know someone is for, afterall. Definitely has his spotify connected

Looking for real connection, someone that's my bestfriend before anything else. Always looking for new music, any song recs?

❥ Opener: opens with something from your profile to show he actually read it and didn't just swipe because of your looks, and to start with an interesting convo!

Saw you like reading. What’s the best book you’ve read so far this year?

❥ Messaging: engaging conversationalist, but not the type to instant message endlessly. Doesn't take forever to respond tho, and if he's about to become busy he'll warn you. Will ask more questions about you than he will share about himself. Gotta keep up that mysterious art hoe vibe he ikes to give off

❥ How he asks you out: would ask you out pretty quickly, perhaps after talking for 2 days or a day and a half. You’d be instant messaging, and he just says your name as if he’s about to say something serious, & lets it hang there for a moment before following up with:

I’ve really enjoyed talking, we should go on a date

❥ First date: chill but gives you something to talk about. Museum, aquarium, bar with a jazz music night, pottery class, etc. Gentlemanly but in a cool way, if that makes sense? Not quite as strict as Nanami, but you will feel a bit like a princess. Definitely pays! Cuts out the awkwardness by saying he's going to cover things before you even go

❥ If it doesn’t work out: lowkey kind of dismissive! He’s not going to outright ghost you…but he’ll breadcrumb you until you bring it up

♡ ♡ ♡

Gojo

❥ Photos: has the most normal photos. Always looks like he’s having fun & hanging with people. One where he took an unwilling selfie with Nanami, another of him standing over a maximum height chart at an amusement park with an exaggerated pout, and a video deadlifting Geto at the gym with passerbys staring judgementally

❥ Bio: uses the stereotypical bios but ironically. You need 3D chess insight to know he’s joking because it kind of suits him LOL

If you like pineapple on pizza, it’s not gonna work 🙅‍♂️🙅‍♂️🙅‍♂️ looking for my partner in crime. The Pam to my Jim 🥰 short king 👑 let me climb you like a tree mens 14 shoes, if you know what I mean 😈

❥ Opener: Gojo likes a casual and playful approach. If your profile has something funny he'll open with that

heeeeey what’s up?

❥ Messaging: weaponizes girl texting. Playful, cheeky. Instant messanger most of the time, but will randomly disappear for a whole day and come back with a lame explanation like 'sorry, was busy with work'

❥ How he asks you out: he’d ask while you’re joking around, after you roast him. Will text for several days before meeting up

mmhm why don't you come say that to my face? 🤨 this weekend over coffee my treat definitely not a date or anything

❥ First date: surprisingly, he goes for the classic coffee shop, window shopping, or movie type dates. Very lackadaisical when planning--kind of stressful if you're a big planner or have a tight schedule. A lot more chill on the date than he was over text. Will pay for everything, obviously, might even buy something you see and casually mention liking

❥ If it doesn’t work out: straight up ghosts you - sorry buddy. He just doesn't like dealing with that mess, and to him, if you haven't been seeing each other that long he doesn't feel obligated to end things directly

♡ ♡ ♡

Kenjaku

❥ Photos: normal, flattering, down to earth. He wants people to swipe so he can mess with them. On other occasions, MIGHT use random people's photos and catfish just because he was feeling goofy. Has been banned SEVERAL times

❥ Bio: Kenjaku is tricky. His profile and approaches change all the time because he's the type that wants to do 'social experiments' on Tinder. I can see him doing the whole 'I made the most toxic profile to see if ppl will still match with me' or making one that comes off SO sketchy it's insane anyone would talk to him. Even worse, will make one looking for a serious relationship only to commit psychological warfare on the poor sap who matched.

❥ Opener: depends on what he wants. Very much a wild card. Some examples:

sends a questionable link - it's a photo of your house from Google Streetview

If being normal, like Geto he comments on something from your profile: you like hiking, have you been to X trail? It has great shade

❥ Messaging: eratic. Either endless chatter, or radio silence. Definitely the most verbose of the bunch--if you've caught his interest or bring up a topic he likes he's texting paragraphs. Will get bored easily if you're a dry texter. Occasionally sends voice memos because it's like a one-sided phone call LOL . Sometimes he asks out quickly, sometimes he doesn't. Sigh.

❥ How he asks you out: I'm a broken record at this point, but it depends on his intent! Sometimes he's charming, sometimes he's insane and wants to creep you out

I have tickets to X, want to join me?

That cafe you went to yesterday looks nice, we should go together sometime

❥ First date: if he's trying to charm you, he'll take you somewhere he knows you like (that he can stand) OR somewhere entertaining like an open mic comedy night. If he's being a menace, he'll take you somewhere really weird like a Quaker meeting (thank you fleabag). Or just stand you up. He'll actually be there, just to watch how you react

❥ If it doesn’t work: will gaslight you into believing YOU'RE the one with the problem and are the reason it isn't working. You might delete the app after suffering this demon

♡ ♡ ♡

Nanami

❥ Photos: his company headshot photo, a few work function photos that he’s cropped and are blurry. He’s not smiling in any of them, except for one of him accepting an award at work where he gave the smallest smile for the photo to look agreeable.

❥ Bio: fills it out like a job application. Straight to the point.

Dating with intention. I enjoy reading and cooking. I look forward to speaking with you.

❥ Opener: Nothing crazy - very standard but more formal than typical

Good afternoon, how are you doing?

❥ Messaging: very formal and polite, doesn’t like small talk but will engage in interesting convos. Doesn't reply instantly, but doesn't leave you hanging for hours--he's a busy guy, afterall. Respectful of your time, and expects that in return. Prefers phone calls! Especially while he's making dinner.

❥ How he asks you out: he’s very effecient, he’s not going to be your penpal. He’ll ask you out within the first day of talking if he’s feeling the right vibe. Thinks meeting in person is better for getting to know someone. Will arrange all the plans and make sure it works with both of your schedules comfortably

I would like to get to know you better. Would you be interested in dinner at XX?

❥ First date: classic dinner man! Won’t take you somewhere intimidating, but definitely something nicer. He doesn’t go on dates willy nilly, so he’s going to treat you right. Will be baffled if you offer to pay

❥ If it doesn’t work: Very respectful, of course. He'll let you know quickly as well and won't lead you on. Will thank you for going on a date with him and say it was a pleasure to meet you.

♡ ♡ ♡

Sukuna

❥ Photos: a shirtless pic with him flexing, one of those middle-aged man selfies where they look stern but also a bit confused bc they aren't sure they're doing it right LOL. One of his car or a bike. He's gotta look badass but kind of looks lame

❥ Bio: BOSSY. He basically has a DNI list but for swiping. Sees it as you being audacious if you swipe on him and aren't worth his time

If you're clingy, desperate, have kids or a moron don't bother

❥ Opener: will say something about your appearance - whether this is positive or negative entirely depends on why he swiped. Somtimes he'll swipe on ppl he finds ugly just to see if he gets a match. He's an asshole like that

You look sexy as hell in that 3rd picture

Don't get your hopes up. You're fucking ugly, just thought you needed to know

❥ Messaging: very dry texter. Don’t ask multiple questions, only 1 will be answered. Takes long to reply as well. Prefers calls, but doesn't like calls where it's just chatting to chat yknow?

❥ How he asks you out: basically tells you you're going out LOL. Will ask you out pretty quickly, he just doesn't care for texting that much

Come to X on Friday. We're getting food.

❥ First date: He's going to take you to dinner, but is one of those annoying mfers that's like 'if you won't get messy in public you’re too full of yourself' so it'll be like bbq or wings at a sports bar. 50-50 type of guy. He's not spending $$ on someone he doesn't know

❥If it doesn't work: oh you know he's going to be ruthless. Your ego isn't going to be wounded, it's going to be evaporated

♡ ♡ ♡

Toji

❥ Photos: only 2 photos - a shirtless, dirty mirror selfie with flash obscuring most of his face & a gym selfie where he’s flexing

❥ Bio: tinder isn’t important to him, so he isn’t going to put effort into his profile, but if it catches him the occasional hookup he won’t complain. One of those terrifying mfers that straight up puts their number on their profile (I'm always tempted to send them something insane)

text me if we match (XXX) XXX-XXXX

❥ Opener: he doesn’t usually open, you gotta text him first. What a bitch. If he does open he'll comment on a photo, something that stands out so it isn't odd to comment on it, but still invovles your appearance somehow so it lets you know he's basically checked you out. He knows being too bold will scare most ppl off

I like the hair. suits you

❥ Messaging: nonchalant, and doesn't reply quickly. Dry, but not as dry as Sukuna. Big breadcrumber - engages juuuust enough to keep you around

❥ How he asks you out: Toji’s intention is usually hookups, so he’s pretty straightforward & will ask if you want to meet that night. Too old for ‘you up’ or ‘wyd’

I’m at X. Want to join for drinks?

❥ First date: usually a bar. Then his or your place. Very low effort. Whether he pays or not depends on you, to be honest. If he gets the vibe you don't care, he won't offer. If he gets the vibe you will care, he'll pay. Very good at reading people

❥ If it doesn’t work out: ghosts, but keeps your number if he wants to hit you up again. You’ll probably get a text 3 months later LOL

♡ ♡ ♡

[kathlare]

stage lights & stolen glances

Lando Norris x Amelie Dayman

Summary: Amelie steps onto the iconic stage of Wembley Stadium for her first performance at the Summertime Ball, but her nerves threaten to overwhelm her. With her family's support and a timely, heartfelt pep talk from Lando, she finds the courage to shine. As she takes the stage, her confidence grows, fueled by the electric crowd and Lando's unwavering presence in the audience.

Wordcount: 2.6 k

Warnings: fluff, smau

request over here!

July 16th, 2024 - London, United Kingdom

liked by f1wagwatch, landonation, and others

f1gossipalert: 🚨 Spotted! Lando Norris and both his and Amelie Dayman's families at the Summertime Ball in Wembley Stadium this weekend. 🎤✨ All eyes were on Amelie as she slayed her first-ever performance at the event. 👏 Lando’s all smiles and cheering for his girl – no surprise, since he’s always been her #1 fan! 😍 Looks like they’re hitting new milestones together, both on and off the track! 🙌💫

View all 993 comments

f1fanatic99: Lando showing up to support his girl like the proud boyfriend he is 😩💯

→ f1gossiper47: @f1fanatic99 Bet he was just happy to see her on stage

f1girl25: Did anyone see the way Lando was looking at her on stage? 🔥🔥

mclaren_moments: Lando in the crowd like "yeah, I’m dating her, get in line" 😎💅

→ f1fanatic17: @mclaren_moments He’s probably out there singing her songs too 😂

f1fanboy2010: Imagine getting to watch your girlfriend perform at Wembley and still have to keep your cool with all those people around 🥴 → amazing_lando: @f1fanboy2010 Lando’s cool factor just hit a new level 😎💯

f1fanatic21: Lando really knows how to pick 'em, huh? 🔥🎤

f1gossiper69: Ah, the classic “supportive boyfriend” post. Cute, but did we hear a rumor about them possibly taking a break? 👀💔

→ landosupporter88: @f1gossiper69 Haters gonna hate, but we ALL know Lando's the biggest Amelie stan 💅

f1fansbykevin: So we’re just ignoring the fact that Lando’s looking like a snack here too? 👀💥 → landoisbae01: @f1fansbykevin Ain’t nobody ignoring that, he’s looking fine as hell 😎🔥

--------------

The buzz of the crowd in Wembley Stadium was electric, the air thick with excitement as the anticipation for the Summertime Ball grew. Amelie could feel the heat of the stage lights on her skin, the vibrant pulse of the music vibrating through her body, but none of it helped to quell the nerves twisting in her stomach.

She was about to perform for tens of thousands of people, and though she had graced many stages before, this felt different. This was Wembley—an iconic venue that she’d dreamed of since she first started performing.

Her team was running around backstage, putting the final touches on her look, adjusting her mic, but nothing was easing the rising panic inside her. She could hear the crowd's roar in the distance, each second bringing her closer to the spotlight.

—Amelie, breathe,— her mom, Victoria, said gently, rubbing her shoulders as Amelie stood in front of the mirror backstage, adjusting her outfit one last time. —You’re going to kill it out there. Just remember why you started this.—

But no matter how many times Victoria reassured her, the jitters wouldn’t go away. Amelie took another deep breath and closed her eyes, trying to focus. Her mom saw the tension in her, though, and she knew just the thing to do.

Turning quickly, Victoria approached a member of Amelie’s team. —Find Lando,— she said, voice low but urgent. —I think she needs him.—

Meanwhile Lando was sitting in the stands with his family, surrounded by the noise and energy of the crowd, but his focus was entirely on Amelie. They were all cheering for Amelie, but there was an undeniable feeling of nervous excitement hanging in the air.

It was their first time seeing her perform on this scale, and Lando couldn't help but feel proud. She was his girl, and she was about to own the stage.

But when a member of Amelie’s team appeared, signaling Lando with a quick wave, he knew something was up. The man gave him a nod, and Lando immediately stood up, excusing himself from his family as he made his way toward the backstage entrance. He wasn’t sure why, but the urgency in the look on the guy’s face made Lando’s heart beat a little faster.

He made his way through the maze of corridors, quickly finding his way to the back of the stage where Amelie was preparing to perform. As he entered the area, he spotted her instantly. She was standing near the side of the stage, hands trembling slightly, her gaze fixed on the ground. She didn’t see him approach, but he could tell from her body language that she was struggling.

Lando’s heart dropped at the sight. She was always so confident, always so in control. But right now, she looked like she was about to collapse from the weight of it all.

—Hey gorgeous,— Lando said softly, stepping close to her, his voice soothing and familiar.

Amelie’s head snapped up, her eyes lighting up the moment they landed on him. A relieved smile tugged at her lips, and she quickly closed the gap between them, wrapping her arms around his neck.

—Lando,— she whispered into his neck, her voice shaky, —I don’t know if I can do this.—

Lando chuckled softly, his hands sliding down her back to comfort her. —Of course, you can. You’ve been preparing for this your whole life. And you’re going to crush it.—

He pulled back slightly to look her in the eye, his thumb brushing her cheek softly, his gaze dark and full of affection. She looked perfect, as usual, but right now she needed him. And he needed her, too.

—You’ve got this, Ames,— he whispered, leaning in closer, his breath warm against her ear. —I’ll be right there, watching you, supporting you every step of the way. You don’t need to do this alone.—

Amelie felt the heat of his words spreading through her body, calming her nerves and igniting something else—something she’d been trying to keep under wraps all day. The feel of his hands on her back, the warmth of his body so close to hers, the sound of his voice—it made her heart race in a way that had nothing to do with performance jitters.

—Promise?— she asked softly, her lips grazing his ear as she pulled away slightly.

Lando’s lips curled into a grin, that playful glint in his eyes. —I fucking promise.—

She laughed nervously, her hands trembling against his chest. The touch of his skin under her fingertips, the solidness of him in front of her—it was a comfort she could always rely on.

But there was something else simmering underneath her nerves, something that had been there for a while now whenever they were together. The pull between them was undeniable, and as much as she tried to keep her focus on the performance ahead, it was hard when all she could think about was how he made her feel.

Before she could stop herself, she leaned up on her tiptoes and kissed him, her lips urgent, needy against his. She had no idea why she felt the sudden surge of heat, but she didn’t care. Lando’s hands cupped her face immediately, returning the kiss with just as much intensity.

Her body pressed against his, the taste of his lips igniting a spark that Amelie couldn’t ignore. The rush of passion was instant, and even though they were in the back of the stage, mere feet away from hundreds of people waiting for her to perform, it was hard to care about anything else.

They pulled back for a breath, both of them panting slightly. Lando’s fingers dug into her waist, and his eyes were dark, filled with something more than just love. —You’re killing me, Ames,— he murmured, his lips trailing along her jawline. —You’ve got to be fucking joking.—

Amelie smirked, running her fingers down his chest teasingly. —What? Can’t handle a little kiss from your girlfriend?— she teased, her voice low and sultry. She was feeling confident now—empowered. The moment they had shared, the way he held her, the way he made her feel... it worked.

Lando groaned quietly, his hands sliding lower. —Baby, you know what I want to do to you right now, but I can’t. Not here. Not before you go on.—

She laughed softly, the sound light and carefree. —Well, I’m not that distracted,— she said, pressing a teasing kiss to his lips. —I’ll get on stage and do what I came to do. But I might just think about you while I’m out there.—

Lando raised an eyebrow, his grin widening. —You’re a fucking tease, you know that?—

Amelie smirked and gave him a playful shove, stepping back as she took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. —Let me go do my thing. I’m not gonna let my nerves get the best of me, not when I’ve got you cheering me on.—

Lando stepped back, nodding with a wink. —I’ll be right here, baby. And when you’re done, I’ll make sure you get all the attention you deserve.—

Amelie gave him one last look, filled with affection and excitement, before she walked toward the stage entrance, her confidence returning in full force. Lando watched her go, his heart swelling with pride, knowing she would absolutely own this.

The crowd's roar reverberated through the stadium as Amelie stepped onto the stage, the spotlight hitting her like a wave. She could feel the pulse of the music beneath her feet, and the beat of her heart seemed to sync with it. For a moment, she hesitated, caught in the sea of lights and faces. But then, she remembered Lando.

His smile, his promise, his touch. His words echoed in her mind: You’ve got this. It was all she needed. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, the nerves dissipating as the music swelled around her.

She moved to the center of the stage, the rhythm taking over. The crowd erupted into applause as her voice filled the stadium, powerful and confident. She could see them all—the fans, the familiar faces of her family and Lando’s in the stands. But it was the one person she kept searching for, the one who had calmed her nerves just minutes before, who made everything feel right.

Lando was standing just off to the side of the stage, not in the private grandstand as originally planned, but in the open for everyone to see. His presence was undeniable. He was watching her intently, a soft but proud smile on his lips, eyes fixed on her every move.

Amelie could feel the electricity in the air, the buzz of excitement that hit a new peak when Lando stepped into view. His smile was wide and proud, his eyes fixed on her like she was the only thing that mattered in that vast stadium. She couldn’t help but grin back, her nerves slowly melting away as the rhythm of the song took over.

The crowd went wild when they spotted him, whispers of "Lando!" and "Look! It's Lando Norris!" filling the air. Cameras flashed, and the energy in the stadium seemed to shift, becoming even more electric. But for Amelie, none of that mattered. She could feel his presence like a warmth in the pit of her stomach, a constant, grounding force that calmed her heart.

And there he was, standing in the middle of the chaos, her biggest supporter, right in front of the stage. She could see him mouthing the lyrics to her song, his lips syncing along, and it made her heart swell with pride. He was in his element too—no longer the reserved F1 driver, but just Lando, her boyfriend, the guy who would do anything to support her.

Her voice grew more confident with every word, the energy of the crowd feeding her performance. She danced, she sang, and most importantly, she let herself feel the moment. She wasn’t just performing for her fans; she was performing for herself, for the people who loved her, and for the guy standing right there, cheering her on.

Her voice grew more confident with every word, the energy of the crowd feeding her performance. She danced, she sang, and most importantly, she let herself feel the moment. She wasn’t just performing for her fans; she was performing for herself, for the people who loved her, and for the guy standing right there, cheering her on.

Mid-song, Amelie’s eyes found Lando again. He was standing at the edge of the stage, his eyes locked onto her with such intensity that it made her knees weak. She winked at him, throwing in a playful, teasing smile as she sang the next line, and to her surprise, Lando winked back, mouthing "You’re amazing, Ames."

The flirtation, the intimacy, the connection—they didn’t care who was watching. They weren’t just two public figures; they were two people who were absolutely, undeniably in love, and the world was witnessing it.

As she hit the chorus, she felt a surge of confidence. She twirled around, arms spread wide, basking in the sheer joy of the moment. Her heart raced, but it wasn’t from nerves anymore. It was from the rush of performing on this stage, knowing that Lando was right there, supporting her every step of the way. The crowd could feel it too—the electricity between them was palpable.

She threw herself into the performance, singing with all the passion she had in her. The crowd’s reaction was overwhelming, but it was nothing compared to the way Lando’s eyes never left hers. He wasn’t just watching her perform; he was watching her be the woman she was meant to be.

The next chorus came, and Amelie pushed her nerves aside completely. She was on fire now, the excitement of the crowd, the music, and Lando's unwavering support igniting something in her. Her steps were precise, confident, and when she reached the center of the stage again, she threw her arms out wide, soaking in the applause.

With one final spin, she let go of the last of her nerves. The music swelled to its climax, and she finished the song with a fierce, confident note. The crowd erupted into cheers, but for Amelie, there was only one person she wanted to see. She glanced at Lando one more time as she took a bow, and his proud, loving gaze was all she needed.

The roar of the crowd seemed to fade as the adrenaline coursed through her veins. She was breathing hard, her chest rising and falling, but her heart was full, her soul lighter than it had been all day. Lando had been right there, supporting her without hesitation, and it made the entire moment even more special.

--------------

liked by hayesgrier, madisonbeer, and others

ameliedayman: Mila’s first wembleyyyy thank you @capitalofficial for having us at your summertime ball. 80,000 of you singing along did not feel real :’) you’ve been so good to me UK thank you!!!!

View all 2,843 comments

landonorris: Can confirm the hottest performer and the hottest crowd 🔥 Wembley’s never seen anything like you 😏 → ameliedayman: @landonorris And you’re the loudest fanboy there 🥰 don’t stop 😘

alexwolffofficial: Wembley? More like Milabey. You crushed it 💪✨ → ameliedayman: @alexwolffofficial STOP, you’re making me blush 😳😂

thisisrozzi: Iconic doesn’t even cover it. You OWNED that stage! 👑🎤 → ameliedayman: @thisisrozzi Awwww love youuuu 🥹❤️

fan4norris: How is Lando not combusting seeing his girl like THAT on stage? 😩🔥

hateralert56: Meh, overrated. Wembley’s seen better. 🙄 → f1fanatic90: @hateralert56 Keep crying while she keeps winning, babe 💅

f1dramaqueen: Amelie serving LOOKS, VOCALS, and STAGE PRESENCE 👏👏 Wembley is quaking!

capitalofficial: She’s the moment. Lando’s the hype man. We’re just lucky to witness it 👏 → ameliedayman: @capitalofficial Best. Comment. Ever. 🙌❤️

maxfewtrell: Wembley? Casual. Can you chill with the world domination for like five seconds? 🤣 → ameliedayman: @maxfewtrell No. Next question. 😌💅

pietrapilao: Literally screaming. I got goosebumps during Espresso 🔥☕ → ameliedayman: @pietrapilao I saw you crying, don’t lie 👀😂

haterenergy: Why is she performing at Wembley? She's overrated.

groupiealert: Lando looking at her like she’s the only person in the world… I’m so single. 😭 → landostan87: @groupiealert Same...

[thetarotwitch111]

What’s their biggest secret? - pick a pile

Spotify reading: taylor’s version

Here’s to show you my spotify readings, is like tarot but using music! I interpret the lyrics of the songs that start playing, connecting them to your life.

✨help me keep bringing you free readings with some TIPS.

Thank you in advance.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

T.S 1:

Don’t Blame Me + August

They’re caught up in a love they probably shouldn’t be. It’s one of those intense I can’t get enough feelings, even though they know deep down it’s not going anywhere. They might play it cool on the outside, but inside? They’re totally obsessed. Like, they know it’s bad for them, but it feels too good to walk away from.

And then there’s the fact that this whole thing is probably long over, but they just can’t let it go. It’s very August, where they’re holding onto a moment that was never meant to last. Maybe it was a fling, maybe it was a situationship that burned out fast, but here they are, still thinking about it, still waiting for something to happen that just won’t.

They’re stuck in the past, replaying it all in their head. They act like they’re fine, but they’re secretly waiting for this connection to come back around, even though they know it’s a long shot.

Let me know if it resonates!

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

T.S. 2:

Lover + Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me

Your person is dreaming of a perfect relationship. They’re imagining a future with this person, but they’re not being fully real. They’re hiding parts of themselves because they’re scared that if they show who they really are, it’s going to mess everything up.

On the outside, it’s all Lover vibes, like they want the romance, the closeness, all that. But on the inside, they’ve got some stuff they’re keeping hidden. They think if their person saw the messy, complicated sides of them, they’d leave. So they’re playing it safe, showing only the “””best”””version of themselves, but it’s draining them.

They want deep love, but they don’t believe they can have it if they let someone see all their flaws. It’s like they’re living in this balance between being loved and being scared they’ll ruin it.

Let me know if it resonates!

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

T.S. 3:

Anti-Hero + Cardigan

They’re really hard on themselves and they’re constantly overthinking everything, feeling like they’re not good enough, or like they’re always screwing things up. It’s Anti-Hero all the way. they might joke about it or act like they’re fine, but deep down they’re their own worst critic. Every little mistake feels huge to them, even if no one else notices.

They’re also carrying around a lot of nostalgia. Cardigan is their whole mood because they miss feeling truly loved and seen. They’re comparing what they have now to what they had before, whether that’s a relationship, a friendship, whatever. There’s this past connection that made them feel safe, and now they don’t feel like they measure up, like they’re not anyone’s favorite anymore.

They’re stuck between their own insecurities and the memories of a time when they felt better about themselves. They want to feel that love again, but they can’t scape the feeling that they’re not enough.

Let me know if it resonates!

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[girlreviews]

Review #146: Parallel Lines, Blondie

Man oh man oh man. I love Blondie so much. I found this record in the Windsor Oxfam. I don’t remember exactly how old I was, but I remember what boyfriend was with me so that puts me between 15 and 18. Yeah, same guy. I actually don’t remember if he ended up getting his hands on this record or not. I think I still have it. Will rifle through my collection later to check.

Blondie was in the “being cool” wilderness for some absolutely crazy reason at that point, and nobody really gave a shit about them anymore. When I was 17 or 18 they were playing the Reading Hexagon which is honestly still just such an unbelievable insult I’m still annoyed about it. I’ll circle back to that.

Parallel Lines epitomizes the complete and total coolness and badassery of Debbie Harry. I have never wanted to be someone more than I wanted to be her. So much confidence. Such incredible cheekbones. Such commitment to art. No apologies. The voice of an angel one moment and snarling whimsical warnings, like, hey you, don’t fuck with me, the next. Always standing in front of all of those completely non-descript nobody dudes. Yeah they’re playing the music, but who cares, who are they? It’s all her. She is Blondie.

Can I pick a favorite? It opens with Hanging on the Telephone, in which she is really threatening to rip the phone clean off the wall. It might be that one. But we’ve also got the classic One Way Or Another, which needs no comment, and one of my actual favorites of all time, Heart of Glass which never fails to fuck me up, but like, it’s a god damn disco track? Like sure, yeah, let’s boogie away our heart break. And I did. And I have. And I will. And these are all SINGLES. We aren’t even discussing the actual album tracks yet. Just listen to it. Honorable mention goes to Sunday Girl, which I always really loved. It’s cute and it’s kind of sweet in a very teenage girl kind of way that worked for me since I was in fact, a teenage girl. Also, not on the official album release, but there was a version of that track where the latter half was sung entirely in French and I always really dug it.

Okay so circling back to the Hexagon. This is a weird story and I’m still not sure how I feel about it, to this day. As I said, Blondie were playing a show at the Hexagon. I was absolutely obsessed with them, and Debbie Harry. I was also 17 or 18 and spent every penny I had on going to shows, but those pennies were pretty limited. I worked as a waitress at the pub that was two doors down from my house. It was full of characters. One such character was a regular, he was in his late 40s, was very wealthy, didn’t drive, was single, and spent literally every bit of his spare time in that pub. Think on that. He paid a lot of attention to the various young women that worked there. Was he creepy? No not exactly. But did it make you uncomfortable? Yes it did. Because you never knew when he might make it weird. Everyone liked him well enough. One day out of the blue this guy presented me with five tickets to the Blondie show. I didn’t know what in the hell to say or whether to accept them. Or what it meant. Whether there were expectations attached to them. Whether it was okay to take them. I was uncomfortable. I was 17.

Here’s what happened. My Mom, who sort of knew him too, since he was always there, decided it was fine, because she wanted to go. But for it to be okay, she decided he also had to come. So we went, he came, and a few friends too. The thing is though, she never knew him like I did. I saw him every day. I saw him with the other girls that worked at the pub. I saw him drunk off his ass. I don’t know that I ever would have taken the tickets. Or if I did, I’m not sure I ever would have invited him. I feel a bit queasy about it to this day. I think in the end something really off-base happened one night between him and someone on staff and he got barred. That was usually the way it went with regulars who were there that often.

The other thing to note is that Blondie ended because Debbie Harry was with Chris Stein, who was literally dying of some rare autoimmune disease throughout their last tour. There were other factors at play, but essentially, they broke up because he was too sick and she stayed at his side and became his full-time carer. When he was well, he left her. They are, remarkably, still close friends to this day and still perform together. Just never forget that men are dogs, and that Blondie is and always will be Debbie Harry. I love her. To this day she looks better than I do in a mini skirt and I love that for her.

ETA: I checked and in fact, I do not still have Parallel Lines in my record collection, but I am quite confident it got lost when I moved back to the US. Also, I’m not 100% certain that show was at the Reading Hexagon. I just know it was a shitty venue not worthy of Blondie. This was 18 years ago. You get the idea.

[blacktobackmesa]

SO I MADE A PROOF OF CONCEPT.

music used: kirby's epic yarn, mort garson's plantasia

voices: my beautiful self

Transcript:

GORDON

“Am I the asshole if I yelled at a clown?” Now I’m gonna pre-empt here. I’m gonna say it first, nobody else gets the satisfaction: What’s Gordon doing yelling at a mirror? Ha ha. Ha ha ha ha.

BUBBY

What-- Gordon, don’t be so hard on yourself!

TOMMY

We’re not gonna call you a clown, Mister Freeman. 

BENREY

Yeah, I like clowns. 

GORDON

Is “I like clowns” your way of saying I’m not a clown? Or are you just saying it? Just saying it to say it? [Beat.]

Benrey, do you not like me?

[Beat.]

BENREY

Clowns are cool, I don’t know what else to tell you. 

[SFX: The Banjo-Kazooie Jiggy Collection Jingle plays. This is Gordon’s stream donation alert.]

COOMER

Gordon, please tell us a story.

GORDON

So! “So I live in Brazil--”

[SFX: The Brazilian Football/soccer goal fanfare. An echoing voice shouts “BRASIL!” and is followed by upbeat music. The sound cuts off abruptly.]

GORDON

Thank you, Benrey. “I live in Brazil, and it’s a little common to have people in clown attire and makeup trying to sell you stuff at the subway entrance, and they can be a little annoying. They even started carrying a credit card machine so people can’t use the old excuse of ‘I don’t have any cash on me’.

DARNOLD

I love the wording of the singular credit card machine for all Brazilian clowns. 

GORDON

[rereading]

“Started carrying a--” I didn’t even notice that.

COOMER

They’re sharing!

BUBBY

“When I was your age, we only had ONE credit card reader, and we had to go all the way to São Paulo to borrow it for ONE customer!”

TOMMY

That must be why they hang out at the train station! 

BUBBY

Right! They have to travel!

GORDON

Come on, guys. Are you really gonna do this to someone who speaks English as their second language?

TOMMY

Oh no! We don’t want to make fun of them. We’re, we just like their words!

BENREY

English is hard. You gotta embrace when you say wrong shit. It’s like art.

COOMER

Gordon, we are creating derivative works from the words of the clown yeller. 

GORDON

Alright, fair enough. “I was walking to the subway that I usually go to. It was early for me, nine in the morning. I was going to work because my boss asked me to go early so the cleaning lady had someone there.”

BUBBY

Nine A.M. is EARLY work hours in Brazil? What the hell are we doing here?

DARNOLD

If I showed up to the Mixology department at nine in the morning, I’d be demoted back down to working at the gift shop!

COOMER

Doctor Freeman was able to hold down his position in spite of his frequent tardiness! 

DARNOLD

Doctor Freeman started the end of the world. 

COOMER

Darnold, that sounds like a skill issue.

GORDON

[beginning with a raised voice to restore order]

“Keep in mind that I was at work until midnight the night before and was going to work until midnight again, so I was a little tired and thinking about my day.”

DARNOLD

You guys got to go home between shifts?

Okay, that-- that sounds a little closer to my work schedule.

BUBBY

GORDON

“Getting close to the subway, I saw the clown and-- [laughs]

[SFX: Gordon’s stream alert faintly goes off. It is followed by the Geraint TTS voice, which says “BRASIL CAMPEÃO DO MUNDO”.]

GORDON

 --I saw the clown and immediately thought, ‘Oh fuck. He’s going to stop me’.”

COOMER

Gordon, I can award you one PlayCoin for every time I have heard that arrangement of words in that order.

GORDON

“‘He’s going to stop me to try to sell me stuff.’ So when I was approaching him, and he already started to talk before I even finished crossing the street, I was already putting my hand up and saying, ‘Sorry man, I’m good’.

BENREY

“No thanks. I already ate.”

GORDON

Exactly. “He tried to make me stop, even though I was on my third ‘dude, I’m good.’ And when he was still trying to make me stop, something came over me.”

BENREY

Lust.

GORDON

No.

Tommy, Darnold, Coomer and Bubby break into laughter. Gordon eventually laughs as well. 

GORDON

No-- [clears throat] “Something came over me, and I just yelled, ‘DUDE!’ and looked at him while I was still walking.” Presumably in Portuguese, so the tone might be a little different from “Dude”.

DARNOLD

Does anyone here know how you say “dude” in Portuguese?

BENREY

You don’t. 

TOMMY

Probably Mano.

GORDON

Chat says “cara or mano”. What was that, Tommy?

TOMMY

Mano.

GORDON

Mano. Good to know. “He looked fucking pissed, and when I was a few good steps away from him, he yelled: ‘I’M JUST WORKING! FUCK!’ And I yelled--”

TOMMY

He broke the clown code!

GORDON

--And I yelled back, ‘FUCK, AND I’M GOING TO WORK!”

BUBBY

A traditional call and response.

GORDON

And it closes with “Did I just create the Joker? Lol.”

DARNOLD

I dunno. I think the Joker would be pretty embarrassed if his entire backstory was getting yelled at once at the train station. 

BUBBY

“You wanna know how I got these scars?”

TOMMY

Yeah. Brazilian Joker-- 

BUBBY

“From sharing one credit card reader!”

[SFX: Gordon’s stream alert goes off once again, followed by the TTS voice saying “Five months. Lust.”]

TOMMY

--he would be a lot cooler than that.

GORDON

So aside from that, is OP the asshole for yelling at a clown?   

COOMER

I think they made a friend!

GORDON

You do? By yelling?

COOMER

These two working class heroes shared an important bonding moment about the difficulties of earning a living.

BUBBY

Yeah, some days you just need someone to scream the Fuck word at.

GORDON

Well, shit. 

BUBBY

OP made that clown’s day.

GORDON

I’m convinced. Yeah, all agreed?

TOMMY

Yeah.

DARNOLD

Yeah, no harm done.

BENREY

It’s part of that circle of life.

GORDON

Well, there we go. Not the asshole.

COOMER

The real clown was capitalism.

[SFX: A fanfare noise plays. This is followed once again by the Brazil Football fanfare, this time played in full without a cutoff.]

[fashionteahouse]

Detonate - paul lahote x reader

You were happy. You were always a joyful person, but you felt complete with your boyfriend, Jared Cameron. You had a crush on him since forever and you were pleased to find out he liked you too.

He asked you out over lunch at a diner you liked to eat at and presented you with a “Will You Be My Girlfriend” dessert plate, with the help of the waiter.

You spent a lot of time together to the point where you began to build bonds with his little siblings. They looked up to you in a way and were happy about how sometimes you gave them advice or take time out to spend time with them.

Jared loved showing you off. His friends already gotten the idea of if Jared was coming, you were coming too. They didn’t mind, they were immune to how crazy you two were over each other.

Jared was particularly happier than usual this day, if that was possible, because his childhood friend, Paul, was moving back to Washington. He was living with his mom but after getting kicked out of public school, being sent to alternative school, and being kicked out of that, she figured living with his dad would help straighten him up.

Jared’s phone rings while you two sit on the couch in his parent’s lounging room. He gets up to answer so he doesn’t disturb you from watching your favorite show, which he agreed to watch with you.

He comes back in beaming announcing, “You know Paul’s over his dad’s house now. Are you coming?”

“Is it okay if I stay here? I don’t want to intrude.” You say to him. You were respectful or giving him some space, you wanted him to catch up with his childhood friend without being too much up under him.

“Are you sure? You know it won’t be a bother.”

“Yeah. I’ll meet him whenever things get settled better.” You promised.

He was reluctant to leave you there but your demeanor let him know that you were okay.

That following Saturday, Jared’s parents were going out of town. His siblings were over their grandparent’s house. He decided to throw a get together. Or a welcome back party for Paul.

You arrive with your best friend Leah and she brings her boyfriend of 2 years, Sam Uley. You liked Sam for Leah and you didn’t pay attention to the public’s opinion about him. They stereotyped him as a sketchy guy but they just didn’t know him. He always had piles of responsibility since a young age, so he was mature. Leah helped him by being his peace and he loved her for that.

It definitely wasn’t a small get together. You would’ve thought it was a new year’s party if it weren’t for it being spring time.

You couldn’t find Jared, so you decided to dance around Leah and Sam. They were too busy following each other’s moves. You didn’t mind, you just felt the vibrations of the musical waves and let yourself have fun.

You saw some familiar faces, chatted with them, and followed them into a smaller room where they were sitting, talking and smoking some tree. You didn’t do it often, just occasionally. You felt comfortable since you knew them, but you just didn’t know the one guy.

Grey clouds were evident in the smaller room and you guys were hotboxed in with the door closed.

“Okay. Shag, marry, kill.” a guy you knew from your own childhood said.

You roll your eyes and groan knowing this guy loves this game.

“Lay it on me.” You say.

“Aladdin, Batman….hmm…oh! Harry Potter.”

The guy that you didn’t know starts cackling loud. “Weird ass choice.” he says.

“This is why I can’t stand him. Okay…kill Batman, shag Aladdin, and marry Harry Potter.” you decided.

“Really? You would kill Batman? He’s a billionaire.” The guy who started the game said.

“Okay but he would stress me out. All of those gadgets in his house and I know Harry’s pretty cool. He can do magic.” you say and cough a little bit.

“Okay but fucking Aladdin is crazyyy.” The guy you didn’t know pipes up.

“Fine! What’s your pick?” you challenged.

“They’re all not my type so I’ll pass.” he replies.

“What is your type?” you inquire, you didn’t want to sound flirty but you were soft spoken because he had such a bold personality. It took the room like it was his.

“Definitely not Aladdin.” he teases and gives you a panty dropping smile. You swallow because your boyfriend is in the same house. You want to stay respectful.

You shift your eyes and tell the girl to your left that ran in the same circle of you and Leah, that it’s her turn.

She chooses to marry Batman of course, kill Aladdin and shag Harry Potter.

After some more teasing, you get up to use a bathroom and get some water for your cottonmouth. You see Jared and run and hug him.

“Hi babe,” he laughs then pauses and whispers, “You’re high?” You nod and shrug.

“You should’ve got me. I would’ve joined!” he says to you.

“I was trying to find you when I came.” you tell him.

Just as he opened his mouth to reply, he looks over you and gets into a bigger smile and steers you along with him.

“I get to introduce you now! Paul, this is Y/N, my girlfriend I was telling you about.” he says and you realize the boy who matched your red eyes and teased you about the game, was in fact Paul.

You’re a bit caught off guard, but decide to shake it off since you’re sure that Paul must’ve didn’t know you were Jared’s girlfriend.

You politely smile, “It’s nice to match the name with the face.”

“Likewise.” he says and doesn’t dare to break the eye contact, as if he’s determined to win a staring contest.

“Come on. You want to dance.” Jared asks you, oblivious to the fact that Paul was close to eye fucking you. You nod with the quickness.

After your high was starting to come down, people started to file out, and the music was lower than when you came in, Jared was ready to wrap up the party. He was thankful that nothing was broken.

”You want me to help you clean up? It’s not a big deal.” You tell Jared.

“No it’s okay, just go ahead. I got it.” he tries to tell you, but you didn’t feel right leaving him to clean up a full house. There were people already helping so it felt only right.

You took two big trash bags to his garage’s garbage can. You spot the mini fridge down there and grab a water bottle.

“You mind handing me one.” a voice asks.

You slightly jump, startled, and drop your bottle out of your hands.

Paul picks it up and hands it back to you. “I’m not that scary damn.”

“I’m sorry it’s just I thought I was down here alone.” you say.

You had him a bottle and he makes sure to make contact with your hand and you pull your hand back and use it to open your drink to take a couple of sips.

“How long have you and Jared been together?” he asks.

“It will be a year this November.” you tell him, slightly smiling. He nods taking in the information and then looks at the label of his drink as if he’s researching something.

“Had to break up with mine before coming here.” he confesses.

“Oh really? Sorry to hear that.” you tell him.

“Yeah.”

“Have you guys considered like…long distance?” you offer.

“Well…I don’t believe in those. I share my love through touch.”

You nod and slowly make your way to the stair case that leads upstairs that leads to civilization.

The house is almost cleaned and you forgot that Leah and Sam were your ride back home. Jared’s parents took their car.

“Damn.” you whisper to your self.

“What?” Paul asks, you didn’t even know he followed you upstairs.

“Oh nothing, I have to call someone to pick me up.” you say softly.

“Paul can drive you home.” Jared says and looks at his friend.

“No! It’s no bother. I’ll just tell Leah or Sam to just come and get me.” you say to your boyfriend, but he just shakes his head and says, “You know damn well they left to get their freak on.”

“It’s alright. I’ll take you home.” Paul ends the conversation with that sentence and his car keys are now in his hand.

With Paul’s back turned, opening up the door to start his car, you give your boyfriend an affectionate smooch and promises to text or call him when you get home.

It was quiet in the car for a bit while Paul was driving. You kinda wish you were still high so the silence wouldn’t be too uncomfortable. Once at a red light, he leans back a bit and looks at you.

“Are you a native to here?” he asked.

You nod your head yes and make a mhm sound.

“I don’t remember too much about being here when I was a kid. Just bits and pieces.”

“Did you like where you lived before moving back?” you ask.

He thinks for a minute before answering, “I mean..it was cool but hopefully it’s not boring here.”

“There’s plenty fun stuff to do here. Well.. at least for me. Everybody’s interests are different.” you tell him.

“Maybe you could show me around. Get me used to being back here.”

“Maybe.” and that’s all you said.

The ride was over and you thanked him for the ride.

“You’re welcome.”

He even waited for you to get into your house before deciding to pull off.

You did let Jared know that you made it back safe and after conversing, you knew that he couldn’t hang with you tomorrow because of work.

So, the next day, you decided to walk to your favorite hang out spot. Headphones in and all. No one knows about it, not even Jared, fearful of it being over saturated.

As you were walking, a familiar car comes into view. You pay it no mind at first but they honk to get your attention.

“Where you going?” You see that it’s Paul asking this as he leaned over with the window down and one hand is on the steering wheel.

“Just going for a walk.” you tell him.

“I can give you a ride.”

Damn. You didn’t want people to find out about your sanctuary. It was the only place you could be free in without worrying about people intruding.

“I’m good! Really.” You say and continue walking.

He doesn’t listen but just instead put the car into cruise mode and won’t give up until you huff and look at him.

“Are you seriously going to follow me the whole way?” You ask.

“I’m just trying to be a gentlemen. I’ll drop you off and leave you alone. How about that?” He tries to compromise.

You hesitate to get in the car and shut the car door. His car was clean and since it was daylight, you had a better look at it. The car’s aroma smelled so good and like him. You shake your head to forego unwanted thoughts. You had a boyfriend who you loved for christ’s sake. You’ll never forget this smell because it’s so unique and it fits him.

You tell him directions and he’s makes his way to the destination. It ends when a woodsy sight makes its way to the forefront.

“Here’s good. Thanks!” You say and fling the door open.

With furrowed eyebrows he looks at the sight before him, “It’s a dead end. There’s nothing but trees here.”

You just don’t say anything because you know beyond those trees, there is a sanctuary that’s waiting for you. You make your way to the through the woods and you don’t notice Paul turning off his car to follow you. He’s a stubborn person and he was nosey, he had to see where you were trying to go.

You notice louder footsteps and whip around to find him taking in the scene.

“Dude, you followed me?” you say in disbelief.

He shrugs and just stares at you, daring you to tell him to leave. It’s not like he was going to listen.

You make your way through the small trail and lo and behold, the swimming hole was right there before you two’s eyes. The blue water was glistening and almost glittering. That’s why you were so protective of this spot, the water was so clear.

“Wow.” you hear him say behind you and you look around to see him with a twinkle in his eye.

“So what do you do here.” He asked curiously.

You shrug, “Swim, read…sometimes just sit on the rocks and listen to music. It honestly depends.”

“Let’s go for a swim.” He suggests.

“Don’t tell anyone about this spot. I’ll hate you forever.” You warn while he’s taking off his shirt.

“You have my word.” He says like he’s taking an oath. He pulls his jeans down and he had basketball shorts on.

You take off your cardigan, which reveals your bikini top and peel off your jean shorts that reveals your bikini bottoms. You chuck off your socks and sandals and leap in with him in the water.

Cold and refreshing is an understatement. It feels like heaven. You feel oddly euphoric, maybe because you have company with you.

Paul comes up for air and shakes water off hair to get it out of his face. “I definitely see why you gatekeep this place.”

“Uh huh.” you say seriously.

“It’ll be our little secret.” He purrs and shines you a mischievous smile.

You look at him for a bit but dunk your head underwater. You swim and swim and come back up for air once you’ve made some distance.

You see him not in the water anymore but he’s sitting on a rock, lighting up a joint.

After he takes two hits he extends it so you can join in. You shake your head but he extends it again in a “come on” motion.

You swim over, sit next to him and one puff and you’re coughing. He’s laughing at you, “I don’t do that weak shit.”

It was good. The high felt better than the high you felt at the party, you felt looser and more confident in a way. You two cracking jokes and swimming around until you two feel drops of rain interrupted the splashing session. You swear in another life Paul was a water bender the way he wouldn’t give you a break.

“Shit! Come on.” you say and make your way to shore and hurriedly put your things back on. Paul doesn’t care to put his shirt back on and just throws his discarded shirt and jeans in the backseat.

By the time you two made it in the car, it’s pouring down raining. Paul turns on the windshield wipers as fast as they can go. He makes his way back to normal road. You two glance at each other and giggle like little children.

“That was..”

“Crazy?” you finish for him.

He nods. After some time, you notice him going in a different direction.

“Actually you were supposed to keep going straight.” you tell him.

“I’m just letting you dry off at my place.”

“Someone’s scared of thunderstorms.” You tease.

“Ha, ha.” he dryly says.

His father wasn’t home. The air was cool and you two were just hanging out watching trash reality tv, not caring about the plot, but making fun of the people on there.

You go to crack one more joke but look at him this time, you see his eyes weren’t on the screen, they were on you. It was like he had a mission in his eyes.

“What?” You start to ask and when he didn’t say anything you touch a spot on your face and look down at your hand, wondering if there was something on your face.

He still doesn’t say anything but lifts your face up with his finger and leans in. You’re too stunned to move because you don’t know what he’s gonna do but in the back of your mind you have a feeling.

The kiss was so different than Jared’s. Jared was gentle and almost careful. The way Paul kissed you was like you were already his woman. He kissed you like he worshipped you and your soul. It left you breathless and feeling tingly. He let go of your bottom lip with a soft pop and you looked at him face, completely in awe.

Then reality hits you. You just cheated on your boyfriend.

You quiver your bottom lip and put your face into your hands, too ashamed to look at him.

A sniffle makes Paul put his hand on your back and asks you if you’re okay. You just shake your head.

“Was I that bad?” he says. You had to hold in your laughter because it was far from bad. It was so good, you almost wanted to hop on him.

You reveal your flushed, emotional face and quiver out, “I’m the worst girlfriend ever. I have to go.”

You turn to leave out but he grabs your arm.

“Hey, it’s still raining out. At least-“

But you don’t care. You yank your arm out and you don’t care that he’s calling your name. Right now you hated Paul’s guts. You don’t care that you had to walk 30 minutes in the rain from his house to yours.

Your clothes are completely soaked and you peel them off and shower. You know you’ll be sick as a dog the next day.

Jared called you an hour ago. You start to tear up all over again and decide to sleep off your misery. You hated yourself for kissing him back and enjoying it.

The next day, you wake up, your throat is a bit scratchy but not too bad. A cough drop will do the trick. You see a text from Jared.

Jared: “I tried calling you yesterday day but you were probably sleep. When you get this call me.”

Your heart is pounding so hard you can hear it in your ears. You nervously press on his contact and he answers after two rings.

“Hello?” he says.

“Hey.” You reply.

“I’m coming to pick you up. Be ready.”

“I don’t think-“ you start to say but he wasn’t having it.

“Come on! I miss you. We couldn’t hang yesterday.

You finally agree and he’s so happy to see you. The only thing that keeps replaying in your mind is what happened the previous day. When he greeted you with a kiss, it felt nothing like it did with someone else.

You two are lounging about in his bedroom when you finally get the balls to want to make things right.

“Jared.” You start.

“Yeah?” he says.

As soon as you open your mouth, a doorbell rings faintly.

“Hang on. Hold that thought, I’ll be right back.”

You sigh to yourself in defeat.

You hear happy chatter going about and realize the person who was outside of the door made their way inside of the house.

The person you did not want to see enters Jared’s bedroom behind him and you felt like your heart dropped.

Jared sits back in his spot on the bed with you while Paul flops in Jared’s gaming chair.

“What were you gonna tell me?” Jared says and looking at you.

“Uh..I forgot.” you say dismissively.

You catch Paul looking at you with a knowing look on his face. It kind of pisses you off.

Jared moves from his spot and puts a game disc in and two controllers now occupy both of their hands.

“I think i’m gonna head out.” You say.

“What? You just got here.” Jared says.

“Bet you can’t beat me.” Paul says. The game is on the try again or pick another character display and Jared snickers and offers you his controller.

Not trying to make anything more weirder than they are, you decide to just give it a shot.

You win, leaving Jared boasting and teasing Paul. Paul just passing it off as beginners luck.

You let them two play and eventually Paul wants to go home. Jared goes to the bathroom.

“I’ll drive you home.” Paul offers.

“I’m good.” you say too eagerly.

“We need to talk.”

“Talking’s the last thing we should do.” You say.

“After this talk, I’ll leave you alone.”

Jared comes back in and Paul volunteers to take you back home and Jared has no problem with it. Kissing you goodbye, you and Paul made your way into his vehicle.

Once he leaves Jared’s block, he begins to talk.

“Look I’m sorry for what I did. It was pretty shitty….The last thing I want to do is break you two up. So what I’ll do is, I’ll tell him I kissed you and you pushed me away and that away he won’t be mad at you.”

“No,” you shake your head, “I can tell him what really happened. You don’t have to cover for me….Why did you do it?”

Silence happens for a beat and you almost regret asking him.

“I just…i don’t know…I like you…and it just happened. You didn’t even like it and I just feel more horrible.”

Was he joking? Did he actually believe he was..bad?

“I liked it.” you whisper but recover yourself, “But I’m devoted to Jared.”

He accepts this.

“Can we be friends?” He offers.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“If you’re going to be around him, I’ll be around. I don’t want any animosity between us.”

You think silently for a long moment.

“We can be…friends…I guess.” you decide and almost missed his grin.

He drops you off and you feel like you’re in a daze. You wanted to kiss him again. You almost wished he kissed you again. But, you know the consequences.

The following day, you wake up to Paul messaging you on a social media site. You two chat and it’s friendly like he promised.

A couple texts turned into full back and forths. Months passed and he doesn’t pursue you again. He even brought a girl to the double date with you and Jared. You felt yourself get jealous. You felt silly for feeling that way.

But your jealously is pushed to side when Paul starts to make comments through texts, making you giggle.

Things were starting to die down with Jared and he begins to notice.

You two sat on a log at the beach with cool wind blowing you two’s way.

“I don’t think it’s working it out.” Jared says to you.

You did feel sad. He was your first boyfriend.

“Is there a way we could..maybe work it out?” you ask him. You did care.

“I don’t know. I don’t want to force something that’s not there for us you know? I’d rather be honest about it than bottle it in and be an asshole to you, you know?”

You nod and you two just sit there, looking into the sunset, still holding hands.

Later that night, Paul texts you again.

He shares a picture of a movie he wants to go see that just came out in theaters. He asks you.

You: I’m not sure. Me and Jared just broke up :/“

Paul: Shit i’m sorry to hear that.

He sends another one.

Paul: Was it because of me?

You: Nah it was mutual

He doesn’t reply after that.

You wake up the next morning to him text you.

Paul: what’s your number? I hate texting on here.

You give it to him automatically before realizing what you were doing.

You two text nonstop until you finally agree to go to the movies with him. He picks you up and buys you both tickets. To compensate him, you buy whatever snack he wants of his choice.

After the movie, you two slowly walk back to the front, joking around and talking about the movie.

After he pulls up to your house, turns to you.

“I really meant it when I said I like you.”

You don’t know what to say to that.

“Can I kiss you again? It’s like you’re addicting.”

You glance at him and blindly nod your head as if you were in a trance.

He makes his move. Leaning in, leaving you breathless again. This time you both are holding each other and there’s no regret.

“You were never a bad kisser.” You say after you two catch your breath.

He smiles a confident smile and says to you, “I know.”

[marythekumquat]

TRIGGER WARNING. CONTAINS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND BULLYING.

Sheesh. You know I’m in a way when I’m making horror/sad art and not my usual goofy shit. Stressed tf out about my move and had to vent with an art program and my fave SWTD characters.

So, I’ve been seeing lots of sympathy for Addair, lately. I wanted to hitch a ride on the bandwagon. Rennick is top on the list for me, y’all already knew that, but Addair really perplexes me. There’s a part of me that really likes him and his gruff English self, then the part of him being a fascist just keeps me at a wide berth. BUT. That doesn’t mean I don’t like him. I love characters made to be hated because they’re interesting. They’re cool to learn more of. Especially dream up your own headcanons to try and explain why they are so hateful. And even more exciting, the chance for them to redeem themselves. Sadly, Addair and Rennick didn’t get that in the game, but that won’t stop us from trying.

HEADCANON TIIIME

I saw a headcanon a little while ago (please if you’re the one who did it, let me know and I’ll credit you, I’m just too lazy to scour for it rn) that Rennick was bullied as a kid, and for some twisted reason, I really liked it. Would explain why he feels this need to have control. Or why he has such a power high. Because he didn’t have any control when he was young. With Addair, an abusive household growing up was my own headcanon. Perhaps he was cemented in these bigoted beliefs because of his father. These demons could be why these two were like the most violent and aggressive infected. The Shape just utilizes all those dark memories to its advantage. Making them the very rage they repressed when they were young.

Was listening to music while drawing this and Still Counting from Volbeat captures these guys perfectly to me, idk why.

I keep forgetting to sign my art. Hey, if you coming to steal, plz show mercy n don’t, ig.

[bloodyinkandquill]

Boombox x autistic Reader

update on me reading coraline, i finished it in a day, not even i started it at noon and finished right before midnight, i read it in 12 hours between all my school work and accidentally napping and getting dinner with my sister (the one who ate the brownie) and also making more of the brownies so more like i read it in 2 hours, anyways onto the hcs!

- “Loud party animal and quiet Alone time? Get you a man who can do both” You said bet, let’s do it

- Boombox is a very sweet and friendly guy, especially around you, when you first told him you were autistic so had some difficulty with certain things that day when he got home he researched it and common things about it so that way he could be as accommodating towards you as possible, and that carried over into your relationship

- One of the first things he gave you was a pair of noise canceling headphones, really high quality and super comfortable, if need be even custom made if your horns got in the way, it was the sweetest thing, you use them often, they double as regular headphones so you can listen to music he recommends you at your own volume, you loved him but on occasion his boombox could be a bit too loud and he understood that and was never offended if you wore your headphones or asked him to turn it down

- Since he more so enjoys just chilling with people it made you less worried about dates, you felt like you could unmask and be yourself around him in private, he never judged you for who you were, saying he loved who you were and didn’t want you hiding yourself from him, that made you feel really good

- He already had some fidgets, even if he didn’t know what they were, so you stole like half of them, specifically that one type that’s those slugs that make that really good sound, you shook it once and decided it was yours now, he just laughed and said that was cool

- Boombox understands raves and party can be overstimulating so never makes you go but he still asks if you want to go with him, if you do he gets really happy and packs anything you might need and tells you just let him know if you wanna leave no questions asked, if you say no he doesn’t mind, partying isn’t for everyone, the bright lights, sounds, all the people, while he loved it he could understand why it was too much for others

- He’s a touchy person but always respects your boundaries surrounding you and physical contact, if your someone who enjoys deep pressure* he is all for you resting your entire weight on him, makes him feel happy, more so if you don’t normally enjoy physical affection, he prefers smaller touches but makes an exception for you for those reasons

- He collects the little things you give him, small trinkets or stones, things that remind you of him, he smiles and thanks you even if he doesn’t quite understand how it reminds you of him, they’re special to him so he shows them off in his dresser all lined up, maybe in order of when he got them or their size or color etc, makes you happy that they’re in an order

- He has a visor, you cannot see his eyes, you don’t have to make eye contact, it’s absolutely amazing, and if you do your looking at pixels not real eyes, it’s wonderful

- That chain on his pants makes a nice sounds when he walks so you can hear him coming if your headphones are off (if he doesn’t have his music on) and it’s cold metal so you mess with it to ground yourself if need be, he sometimes doesn’t notice you messing with it, till he says something to you, you don’t respond, and he looks over to you to see you messing with the chain completely focused on it, unaware of anything else, he says your name and you just look up at him with the tbh creature face, it’s really funny

bros just saw bettlejuice bettlejuice so good, really funny, i like the first more but it was a really good sequel, saw it with my best friend so we had a lot of fun

*Deep pressure is a common neurodivergent love language, more commonly seen in autistic people, it is feeling love when laying your entire body pressure, or having the other person lay their entire body pressure, on you/them, makes many neurodivergent people feel safe and loved

[artsyfartsypaige]

Guess who saw the A.R.T production of Gatsby the other night?!?!?! It was truly an amazing show (I legit cried during it) and I would love to bring up some of the highlights. In a few scenes, my only thought was “the tumblr is gonna love this”. It was a phone free show so I don’t have photos of the stage or actors but I’m happy with discuss.

1) The stage was made of metal car parts, glittery string curtain and two black marble staircases. It was kinda split between Gatsby’s world and the Valley of Ashes.

2) The actor for Nick, Ben Levi Ross, was probably the funniest actor in the show. He had great line delivery. He was also super short and literally everyone towered over him.

3) on everyone’s costumes, there was a coating of dirt/rust at the bottom. It was such a cool little detail.

4) Nick has a small panic attack when fireworks go off at the party and this is how him and Gatsby meet. They sit together on the bottom of the stairs and it legit felt like a rom com meet cute.

5) yes, Nick makes out with McKee. He spends every party scene from that point on flirting with some guy or making out with a member of the ensemble.

6) I’m not totally sure if Gatsby is still a bootlegger in this version but they show him killing a man so he’s definitely involved in some sketchy business.

7) Wolfsheim signs a song called “Look like heaven but feel like hell” which was my favorite. It’s him explaining Gatsby’s fake origins to Nick. Gatsby gets to do a full dance number and quick change into his pink suit.

8) They added some backstory to Myrtle and Wilson that they lost a daughter in the Spanish flu. It was a sad but sweet detail as to why they’re the way they are.

9) In the tea party scene, Nick pushes Gatsby back onto stage after he runs out in a panic.

10) Gatsby doesn’t die in the pool, Wilson shoots him on the staircase.

11) Gatsby’s father is indigenous which is LOVED! I’ve always imagined Gatsby to be indigenous and so seeing that others had the interpretation was amazing.

12) overall beautiful music. A lot of raw emotion and a wide range. Wolfsheim’s song and “The Damage you do” by Tom and Daisy were my favorites.

Let me know if have any questions about anything!!! I really want to discuss the show!! Here’s the book I brought signed by the cast!!!