#so that feels somewhat relevant
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forgot an option.. the phregnancy
#dinok maybe???#that would be huge news and really exciting!#i think something related to 5 years post coming out is a possibility. now idk if pride uploads on dapg would be as regular as gamingmas#but i mean it’ll be the first pride where they’re active on dapg post coming out#so that feels somewhat relevant#wedding hill#i think dinok is more likely but do i believe in wedding hill yes#dnp tour i don’t know bc it’s been so soon after wad but maybe in the future i don’t really know#i would support if they’d do another creative thing like dapc#phan#dan howell#amazingphil#dan and phil games#dan and phil#dan and phil poll
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y'know, probably because i hate simple power dynamics a lot, but i really love how weird and complicated power dynamics are in tlt.
like, in gtn, harrow makes the assumption that coronabeth is "the dominant" in her relationship with ianthe, but we as the audience know that ianthe has power over her because of coronabeth's secret, and coronabeth often ends up coming across as more submissive in her interactions with ianthe.
harrow holds a significant amount of power over gideon, but gideon also holds more power over her than she herself is aware of, because all of gideon's actions affect harrow.
john is the most powerful character in the entire series, but his personality is so docile and non-confrontational that even as god, he's more likely to obey than demand.
then, and thank you tamsyn muir so much for writing them the way you did, there's characters like cam and pal, who seem to have no power dynamic at all. they're equals. camilla obeys palamedes, but not because she has to, rather because their goals almost always align. palamedes takes camilla's advice and supports her in any way he can, not because he's afraid of her or she holds power over him, but rather because he trusts her to know what to do. they work as one.
that's why paul can exist as the perfect lyctor, because they're made up of two souls working together, rather than one soul consuming or suppressing another.
#with that being said#i do still think that if jalecto acheives perfect lyctorhood alecto's soul is still gonna be a bit stronger than john's#but y'know what? to me that's how it should be.#that as a power dynamic feels natural.#just like camilla and palamedes becoming one feels like the right thing for them#john becoming just a part of alecto seems like the perfect end for him.#oh also somewhat relevant to this post: the general idea of the cavalier/necromancer dynamic is so interesting#technically the necromancer holds the power. but the cavalier IS the power.#the sword and the hand that wields it etc etc#also necromancers being physically weaker and often smaller#whereas cavaliers literally have to be strong for their job#creates another interesting dynamic#the locked tomb#tlt#tlt spoilers#gtn spoilers#htn spoilers#ntn spoilers#paul tlt#palamedes sextus#camilla hect#gideon nav#harrowhark nonagesimus#ianthe tridentarius#coronabeth tridentarius#john gaius
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absently scrolling through my Facebook feed, when...
[me, suddenly a whole lot more attentive] OH YES INDEEDY HOT DAMN IT SURE IS 🤩
[eagerly continues scrolling]
...
...
😑 how dare you.
#i've included the readmore in an attempt to re-enact the experience somewhat#it's not actually long at all#not sure if it'll actually work out that way but i kinda feel it was relevant enough to try lol#anyway so today i got catfished by a line break#the way i yelled “no it fucking isn't!” at the screen like an entirely sane person#good times 😅💀
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Tagged by my lovely @thecynical-idealist, thanks so much S🫶🏻
Describe yourself ONLY with pictures you have. You cannot search or download new pictures.
I tag: @devaneiossuspensos @desideria @the-3rd-of-may @sophism @455u @margaritawithouthermaster @chapricot
#haven’t done a tag game in a while#I feel like I missed a couple#bc I couldn’t do it when I saw them and then I just forgot💀#anyway#tried to make this somewhat aesthetic#but also somewhat relevant#peep my cinnamoroll case in the middle lol#also Chris bc he’s the loml#and yk he is me I am him#stuff he says hit too close to home sometimes:)))#i will be so annoying on Thursday I can already feel it💀#kay irrelevant rambling done now#tag games#moodboard
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Apparently some people think that hellaverse fans with ageless blogs/accounts are automatically minors so I quickly drew this to say that no, I am not a minor
Also not ship art
#Wish I could have multiple pinned posts#Also somewhat relevant but I'm pretty sure I got mistaken for like an 8yo today. To be fair though. It was on the phone and I was#translating something for my mom so. Shrug. Also I couldn't think of a third relevant d word so autistic it is#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel lucifer#hazbin sona#hazbin hotel self insert#my art#nillisaie draws#also I know I can just put my age in my whatever but I don't feel comfortable with that for reasons. Also I'm procrastinating updating it
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hi i just had to say i LOVE your art style i am obsessed with:
- how dynamic all ur pieces are the ones from fhjy ep18 captivate me especially
- the way u draw riz's ears like idk i just love them
- ur posework it is AMAZING
haha thank you very much! I'm very glad ur enjoying what's goin on around these parts :]
#not art#I feel like most of my line illustration stuff nowadays is informed extremely heavily by my comic work#there's a distance between linework and the rest of drawing that really makes comic stand out I think. idr who said this but I saw#trung lê of the magic fish fame bring this up iirc. that linework is closer to handwriting than to the usual notion of drawing or painting#I didnt get that when I read it but the more I sit on it the more I Understand. linework is inherently abstracting and codifying#like there's no line in real life the way it exists in comic work. at its core linework is a language more than painting is#this is so not what this ask is abt lol I just! love ink and comic a Lot. sorry any time u bring up any of these things this will happen#also Im glad u like how I draw riz's ears!! this bout of art is coming in like also at the same time as dungeon meshi going into mainstream#and me getting reminded of ~~worldbuilding~~ etc and how fun it is to do like. scientific illustrations for things that arent real lol#technically I have like somewhat of a guide in my brain to how I draw ears and teeth for different dnd races present in fh#but I def am used to drawing riz's ears the most lol. bc Ive been drawing him so fucking much bc I love him#but also its relevant on the subject of guy what wears glasses. gotta be a special grip for that frame lol since his ears point outward
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might fuck around and start following the wheel of the year again
#probably not. my attention span is so bad#but it'd be good for me#I don't think I have enough sincere belief in The Other left in me to do neopaganism on a meaningfully religious level anymore#but keeping track of and making very intentional connection with the changing of seasons and phases of the moon#and doing little rituals about it#would fix me I think#although the PROBLEM. that I've had in the past with Wheel Of The Year™ is that the popular one follows. like. ancient irish seasons#'the second of february is the beginning of spring' no the fuck it isn't!! lambing season isn't relevant to me OR local natural history!!#I like a solstices/ equinoxes/ And In Between approach to When to do observances#and honestly I don't mind a celtic/ pseudoceltic approach to celebrating them IN THEORY#I'd just like to adjust it to ACTUALLY connect me to the land I'm a part of instead of like. you know.#completely superficial trappings of In Tune With Nature that doesn't take nature into account at all#'samhain is The Harvest and Preparing For The Winter' okay that's fine for ME but there are people who live in florida#why do we keep asserting these points of the year as if they're universally applicable...#.... A TANGENT. ANYWAY. more excuses to burn incense and light little fires and also feel GROUNDED IN TIME SOMEWHAT I'M ALWAYS SO UNMOORED-#me: god I love themed decor and food and scents and activities and aesthetics but I never want to Throw A Party#me age seventeen: um hi hello yes can I interest you in. seasonal altars.#about me
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obviously reading ihnmaims brings to mind siminc/simyoung a little bit but theyre kind of opposite situations, i think.... at the end of the day ted and friends Could Die. there was danger in that last bit of life they had and could lose and steal away from AM. whereas the cruelty of siminc was demonstrating over and over that you are not human and not afforded any of the protection of humanity, not legally and not even physically through death-as-escape
#I think sayer also went Hmmmmmmmmmmmm after reading ihnmaims but for completely opposite reasons#not really caring at the torture etc but it spent A Long Time thinking about AM#and being somewhat offput by his situation and disliking that.#'well i cant feel hatred. So that isnt relevant to me' shrugs and moves on.#got weirdly specifically mad at ted being misogynist to the exclusion of other Difficult Elements same way it did at the monkeys paw lol#sayerposting
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im actually soooo sick in the head about replaying da2 soon....... red!hawke rogue/warrior wrendell is going to go so fucking hard im actually excited
#💾#i will be mourning purple mage wren but like. idk man this is doing it for me and i havent even started#and i havent felt very connected to wren in years the way i used to. maybe i need to shake it up#sometimes i feel like i get too caught up in making a 'narratively relevant' dragon age character n thats why i dont get super into em#because i want CONTENT and i want to feel like my character is Important. hence why i play dalish mages in inquisition primarily#as well as elves in dao because i want to stick it to the racism#and it's also why i had branwen romance morrigan and follow her into the mirror bc i wanted him to be somewhat relevant in the later games#buuuuut bioware decided the warden and kieran have NO relevance in vg whatsoeverrrrr#so i will probably be replaying that too and romancing zev LOL#and im thinking i might do an adaar on my inquisition playthrough#but who knows when im gonna get around to all that bc im in love with veilguard currently#and i think i want to replay it Once before i replay all of the other games. and then i can replay dav a third time LOL#bc lleyth is my babbyyyyyy im not ready to play other characters yet i love them :((((
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i didn’t really want to post this but i just want to say thank you to whoever it was that addressed me as “fox” in the asks (if you see this then you probably know who you are)
it was a few days ago now, but it’s made me realise that i really don’t get to experience that sort of thing often and it means a lot to me (far much more than it should). and thank you for the “comfort” even if i don’t necessarily deserve it at all.
i don’t think i’ll ever get that in real life and while i’ve already thought to myself that i’d be happier being referred to as (that), it’s not like i ever find myself in a situation where that happens. and now when it has i’ve gotten pretty emotional over it, several times. sometimes i look back at the message and read it again because of that. i don’t know if this sounds stupid or trivial but it really means a lot to me and i need to get this out there because i want to make that clear.
this is more of just an observation of my own feelings. i don’t know
#i want to be careful not to make it seem like i’m dragging this in any capacity#it feels like a breath of fresh air when i publish my own thoughts and i can’t explain what exactly it is.#nobody in real life will ever listen and this is the most i can do#people say they won’t ever judge but they do#i am afraid people will never understand. but it’s probably ok#i’m not trying to spam long vent posts every day like i did before. i can keep that in somewhat#alterhuman#therian#nonhuman#<- relevance?#i kind of want ppl to see this one though. some posts are more meant to be viewed than others#there’s only so much i can do as i wait for things to fall into place
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silly oc doodle..... ballroom yuri
#ocs#ok so im gonna ramble/complain in the tags for a bit bc i love to complain its mostly not even gonna be relevant to the ocs but anyway ok#yknow that diagram abt art skills thats like ability to see/ability to draw#im at the BAD PART OF IT RN#i wanna draw fanart so bad but then i get annoyed bc the fanart doesnt look as good as the source material GHRG which is a totally#unreasonable thing to think bc source material is drawn by Professionals but you know how it is. Art Hard etc etc complain etc etc#need to do more studies etc etc#i wanna be able to draw really good so i can draw the things i love!!!!! even if its hard and tedious i wanna practise!!!! i love art!!!!!!#dont think about whats easy think about whats fun - bokuto koutarou etc#anyway everyday i am sad i have to sit in front of a desk for 8 hours instead of practising drawing :( i wanna table at a con this year....#but is there even time.....#ANYWAY this is somewhat relevant bc in an effort to be less hard on myself mayhaps i will try draw more oc things so i dont feel pressure#(self imposed)#to make it perfect kjskjkd#or at least not as much#and hopefully get over my brain's tendency to Compare Everything#i have like 3 vague sets of ocs (one less vague than the others ive posted one of the characters from that on my main art blog before sjdks#these two are from the next less vague set there is a plot premise and some side characters too. shdks#i thought abt them a couple months ago but then i watched strictly ballroom w sophie n i was reminded of them again#anyway im not good at coming up w fully fleshed out stories i just like to doodle ppl n think of random connected scenarios sometimes sdjk#i did a mini free online life drawing course in the break n i tried to apply what i learnt here.... i will keep practising when i can.....#well. if u read all the way to the end. hello :) KJASKA#im going to shower....
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I know I've said this time and time again in the last year or so, but it's still something that I hope falters off in this new year. But I really hope the thing of putting any audio drama, no matter the genre, in the horror category. Unless a show is specifically stated as being in the horror genre, it should not be put on lists reccing horror podcasts or anything like that. Sure, there can be horrific elements in an audio drama (Thinking of things like Wolf 359 and Red Valley here, since those two I consistently see named in the horror genre when they're very much not, and stated as such) but that doesn't mean it fits in that genre. I can't speak for all creators out there, but if I was making a non-horror AD and someone called it an AD, I'd kinda hate/dislike it.
And if this is because most of these individuals who say these things only listen to horror audio dramas or adjacent, please if you do anything this year, please listen to some things outside of horror. There are phenomenal audio dramas that deserve the listens that aren't under that banner, a few of them are up there with my favorite.
But please, 2024, make sure the horror audio drama you're reccing is, you know. Actually a horror audio drama.
#audio drama#critical#mostly fandom based but all in a very 'im not mad im disappointed' voice#and also tags from littleacebee from a post reblogged from me that i really agreed with (not 100% relevant for this post but somewhat)#saying: also all the post that say 'horror podcasts' when post could easily be just about fiction podcasts. /#horror is not the only genre here'#is also a great point i feel like the audio drama community is so focused only on horror and it's tiring sometimes#im all for ppl having their enjoyment of things but. damn. it's a lot!
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I'm conflicted on whether or not I'm going to "let" antis follow my art account, or if I will ever even post anything ""problematic"" on there, because I want to make art my job, and it seems like a large potential audience to be getting rid of, but I also don't want to associate with antishippers on a personal level so... I don't know. Like I'm not breaking your DNI if you're following me, why do I even care.
#personal#<- kind of lmao#I'm trying to somewhat separate my art from my old blog which also includes removing it as a sideblog on my other acct#I just feel like it's a good move to make because again I want it to be my job and such#And I don't want people following me on there especially from knowing me on that old acct because I've changed a lot as a person in 3 years#(And also my art is just much better now lmao)#I don't really like talking about shipping discourse that much tbh and it's really not that relevant to my art atm so idk why I'm so worrie
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chat i still haven't decided what cursed technique to give reader in this fic and it's kind of fucking me up. i wish i could just throw some shit in there and be happy with it
#rambles.#if anyone is good at this kind of stuff and feels like helping..... i wouldn't mind#it is somewhat relevant to the plot. yet i have not settled on it#ugh 😪 this is partly why i've never written a series before because i'm so picky about details#and it's exhausting because it has to be ✨perfect✨ smh tho i've been trying to be better#this is one detail however where i feel it really needs to be right
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casually spiraling and dont think there's anything i can do about it at this point anymore. i wanna just give up and let myself spiral.
#something something alcohol disclaimer#what is it about depression that has a siren call no matter how well you're doing. why would i ever think it's more comfortable and safe...#been in denial for a bit now; thinking that even if i was sad i was at least dealing wtih it better than i would have in years past#that i'm just normal sad - normal ups and downs. that i was in 'control' and wouldn't fall as Low™️ as being more than 'normal sad' again#i know where things changed for me back in feb and i've been trying to 'get back to myself' since then but i keep falling flat#i've been so terrified of going back to who i was before i was doing so well and yet i feel like it's happening#i'd never done so well for so long and thought i was somewhat safe#thought i had more awareness and coping mechanisms to handle inevitable sad times in life#but almost half the year is passed now and everything is one step forward and either one or two steps back#i'm trying so hard all the time. i work hard at myself#and for what? just to get to many more nights like this where i feel like i'm not trying at all and want to let myself rot?#like the garbage i feel like i am?#i'm either spinning my wheels or getting worse. and i feel like thinking that itself is a bad sign and is hould be fighting that thought.#but it's an observation...#sometimes it's so relieving to just give up#my heart hurts and i keep getting teh anxiety tummy of constant butterflies/the sensation of zero g#every minor thing feels like the end of the world#i want to sob and drink and cvt/burn and shop and smoke weed and drive 100 mph and eat an#anyway thanks for coming to my emotional rampage if you've read this far lolz uwu#*throws self into kink for psychologically relevant catharsis & comfort*#personal
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every day i fight for my life on twitter as stupid people who would fail even the simplest media literacy test slander and bastardize childe’s character
#i’m down here in the TRENCHES#EVERY DAY WITH THIS SHIT#every day with ‘why did the traveller chose to trust childe over the twins?’#OH I DON’T KNOW REBECCA MAYBE BECAUSE THEYVE KNOWN HIM FOR THREE YEARS??#AND HAVE ONLY KNOWN THE TWINS FOR LIKE. A FEW DAYS MAX??#MAYBE BECAUSE CHILDE NEVER LIED ABOUT BEING IN THE FATUI OR WHAT HIS PLANS WERE??#WHEREAS THE TWINS LIED TO US AND ONLY TOLD HS THE TRUTH WHEN IT WAS RELEVANT TO SAVE THEIR ASSES FROM JAIL??#OR PERHAPS ITS BECAUSE THE TWINS WERE GIVEN SOMEWHAT OF A CHOICE TO JOIN THE FATUI WHEN CHILDE WASNT#ANY OF THESE REASONS GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU??#no. ofc not. because these people genuinely believe childe is a shallow one dimensional character#who only cares about fighting and serving the tsarista#his family?? nonexistent!! his trauma?? what’s that!!#boy we sure love a boring villain!!!!#anyways#being smart as a genshin fan makes you feel like a genius bro so many people are painfully ignorant#genshin impact#childe ♡
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