#so super weird and i feel confused about the actual position

[unganseylike]

had a deeply confusing interview i had to do on my phone bc my laptop camera broke last minute. where they literally didnt ask me any questions and basically offered me the position at the end

[seireiteihellbutterfly]

JJK Men And Reader With A Sensitive Clit

part 2 with Geto here

♥ Warnings: Mentions of trauma, sexual themes, clit and vaginal fingering, oral sex

♥ Summary: Reader with a sensitive clit. What will our men do to work around this?

♥ Featuring: Gojo and Nanami

♥ Word Count: 1957

JJK Masterlist

Gojo

“So fucking wet… can't believe this is all for me…”

Your new lover is eager to please and you lay back as his tongue pampers your clit, licking at it like candy. Whimpers escape your mouth, your hips rocking to meet his rhythm, but the thoughts at the back of your mind are distracting you.

That's it? You couldn't last longer than that? 

That's no fun… You cum too soon 

You and your over sensitive clit… You don't deserve to be eaten out if you're going to cum so soon… 

You are suddenly filled with anxiety and you stop being responsive. You were already close. Super close but your body jerked at those thoughts and moved your pussy away from Gojo, making him lose his rhythm. 

Piercing blue eyes look at you, his mouth setting into a frown. “Did you not like it?”

You take a few deep breaths, trying to gather your thoughts but the memory is still stuck, taunting you. “No I liked it…Was about to cum actually.”

Gojo's eyebrows knit together in confusion. “Then why…?”

You bring yourself up to a sitting position, feeling embarrassed and slightly humiliated. Gojo scoots over to you and starts stroking your hair. “Are you uncomfortable? Because if you are -”

“It's not you.” You cut him off, unsure if you wanted to tell him. You're worried he would think the same way your past boyfriend did. That you were boring, that it's not fun when a girl cums too soon, that you should not expect oral if it gets you off that fast… 

Gojo has been watching you patiently this whole time, trying to process your reactions. He strokes your arm, concerned. “What are you not telling me y/n?”

You sigh, your face burning. “I cum too fast.”

Gojo blinks, unsure if he heard you correctly. “You… What?”

“It doesn’t take long for me to orgasm, Like if it’s really good, I can have one in under a minute.”

Gojo still looks confused. “And this is a problem because…?”

“You don’t think it’s boring to have a partner who cums too fast?” Your chest tightens at the thought, wondering what he thinks about you. Gojo continues to stroke your arm, before giving it a reassuring squeeze. 

“Ah…I’d say that’s kind of hot. Under a minute? Really?”

You look at him in surprise. “Really? You don’t think it’s weird? You don’t think…” you pause before saying the rest. “You don’t think you’ll get tired of giving me oral if I keep cumming so fast, and it’s over before you really got into it?”

He chuckles softly and pulls you against his chest. “Pretty girl…where’d you get it in your head that giving oral gets boring if you cum quickly?”

You blush against his toned chest. “Just…an ex…”

“Then they’re not worthy of you. Aw baby, no. Don’t you ever think that way.”

Reassured, you nestle against his chest. A few moments pass in silence before he speaks again. “Have you ever had multiple orgasms before?”

You look at him in confusion. “No but, what does that have to do with anything?”

“Well, I read somewhere that if you cum really quickly, that’s not your real orgasm. It’s a pre-orgasm which then leads to the big one.” He looks at you thoughtfully. “Wanna try it out?”

The expression on your face says it all. “You’d want to do this with me?”

“Hell yeah. You think I’m not up for it? A chance to make you cum over and over?”

Internally, you couldn’t believe it. He really wanted to do this. Were you even capable of multiple orgasms? You were so sensitive after it happens. Gojo seems to read into your uncertainty and he reassures you. “At any point if you’re uncomfortable just tell me. I swear I’ll stop.”

He kisses his way down your body, parting your legs, licking your inner thighs, before going back to licking the sensitive bud. His arms lock around your upper thighs to prevent them from closing. 

You feel the buildup happen quickly, moaning as your folds grow wet from your slick and his saliva. The orgasm grips you within a few seconds and you moan lewdly, feeling Gojo’s tongue press up flat against your clit as your sex spasms from pleasure. 

“You weren’t kidding…” He laps up at your juices, the sounds of wetness adding to your arousal.

“No I wasn’t I - ohhhh.” Your words cut off as Gojo gets back into it, his lips pulling on your clit, abusing the very tip of it with his tongue. You feel your mind go hazy, pussy sensitive from the recent climax and whine. “Gojo…It’s…sensitive…ngh…”

His eyes lock onto yours and you can’t help but stare back, seeing nothing but enthusiasm. Sweat breaks out on your skin as he keeps eating you out, his long fingers slipping into your leaking core, finding that spot inside you and curling his fingers into it. It’s like a hook behind your navel is pulled, and you mewl your pleasure as a second orgasm hits you almost instantly. 

The second one felt so much different than the first. The first one felt almost delicate in comparison to this one which had a stronger intensity, your pussy spasming around his fingers for what felt like minutes before finally receding. You try to catch your breath as Gojo grins at you from between your legs.

“How about a third one?”

You chuckle weakly and bite your lip. 

“As many as you’ll give me.”

Nanami

It’s finally happening. After patiently dating for nearly 2 months, you and Nanami decide you’re both ready to get physically intimate. His kisses were so tender and sweet, taking his time until you started sighing against his lips, slipping your tongue for more. Both your clothes came off slowly, as he laid you back on the bed, drinking in your blushy face and how sensitive you were to his touch, his every whisper and tickle. 

You were enjoying yourself at first, moaning as he kissed and nibbled your neck, your collarbone, as he came down to your breasts, swirling your hardened nipples with his tongue. Your body was soft and compliant under his, admiring how beautiful and toned he was, his sharp brown eyes looking at you with affection as he ran his tongue between your breasts, down to your belly, nibbling your belly button as he continued down to the sweet spot between your thighs. 

You try to remind yourself this is a different person, that Nanami wouldn’t ever shame you or hurt you but memories keep intruding your thoughts as he starts to part your legs. 

It hurts…don’t do it like that…

It hurts? What’s wrong with you? You’re a chick right? Don’t like having your clit touched? What’s the fun if you can’t handle some pressure?

I don’t like it that hard…

The pain will pass…just wait it’ll feel good….

No…stop…

Let me touch it…

You’re hurting me…stop…STOP…!

“Y/n?”

You hadn’t even realized you’d squeezed your eyes shut and that there’s a tear rolling down your cheek. Mortified, you look to see Nanami crouching between your legs, his expression full of concern. He stops immediately and moves up towards you as you clutch the blanket and try to cover yourself, shame filling you. You had hoped the trauma would go away if you had tried to have sex again, with someone you felt like you could trust. To get Nanami’s hopes up like this, then to have this response…Would you be able to enjoy sex like a normal person ever again?

Strong, warm arms envelope you from behind, pulling you to his chest, comforting you. Nanami rests his cheek on your hair. 

“I’m fine.”

”You were crying y/n. That’s not fine.” His hands gently cover yours, which are tightly clasping the blanket. “Talk to me.”

Those words, spoken with so much sincerity, almost make you break down completely.

”It’s nothing, I just…I don’t like…” You squeeze your eyes shut, feeling mortified that you have to say this. “I don’t like having my clit touched. Every time anyone tries to touch it, it’s too…hard? Painful? I don’t know. I just don’t like it.” The words roll out.

”And…were you crying because I was about to…?”

You take a deep breath, realizing you’ll have to tell him the truth because otherwise, he’ll probably assume it was something he did, because that’s just who he was. “It wasn’t you. In the past I wasn’t treated very nicely about this. A lot of people told me it’s supposed to feel good, that the pain was part of the pleasure. And I know it can feel good, because it does when I do it by myself. But others…”

Your voice trails off. You wait for it. For him to realize you’re a freak. There’s a moment of silence. Then…

”Why not tell me if you didn’t want me to go there?” His voice is soft, full of understanding.

”I don’t know. I just didn’t want you to think I was weird. I want to have someone touch me there and feel good but it just hasn’t worked well in the past.”

The delicate strength he holds you with comforts you and you manage to calm down. He was silent for a moment then he asks you, “How do you do it?”

”What?” You’re surprised by the question.

”You said it feels good when you do it. So how do you do it?”

Your face flushes red. No one had asked before. “I um…kind of…just…grab both sides of my pussy…and roll it in between.”

“Would you be open to me doing that?”

You take a minute to process his words, unsure.

”I’ll stop if it starts to hurt,” he adds immediately. He’d never hurt you, never on purpose. 

With a nod of your head, you turn to lay on your back and the both of you start up again, the kisses, the little tickling caresses. When you start sighing, he slips his hand down and gently places his thumb and index finger on the fatty folds of your pussy, giving a soft squeeze which has you gasping.

You take deep breaths, and then he brings the folds together over your clit and its heaven. Your eyes close, savoring the gentle pleasure that you thought you would never experience. He keeps his eyes on your face, looking for signs of discomfort, but none show up. He keeps a steady rhythm, rolling the little bud between your steadily moistening folds, building up your arousal until you feel yourself dripping with need. 

A delicious shiver passes through your body and before you can stop yourself, you say, “faster”. There had never been a time you’d asked for it to be faster.

His fingers, so dexterous and clever, pick up the speed that’s rolling the folds of your sex and you whimper at the sensation, not painful at all. You half open your eyes, your mind somewhere between pleasure and reality, see his brown eyes fixated on yours, making you blush at the intensity of his gaze. 

His free hand tugs your hardened nipple, his mouth coming down over the other one. The sensation builds slowly, the room filling with your delighted mewling, hips bucking, desperate for a release. Heat gathers in your belly, your abdominal muscles tightening, his fingers patient and tender. 

Your fingers grip the bedsheets as you sob out your pleasure, climax gripping you so softly yet intensely, wave after wave racking your system. His fingers keep up their movements guiding you through it. When you start to quiet down he tenderly kisses your lips. 

“Was that all right?”

You sigh and rest against the pillow. 

“More than all right.”

dividers by @/cafekitsune

[fangirl-dot-com]

Chapter 24 - Loving Her was Red and Navy

Guys...it's time

“And that is p-” 

Your eyebrows scrunched as you couldn’t hear the rest of what Mitch had said on the radio. You pressed the button down, hoping to try to hear it once again. You had just completed your final quali lap for the Italian Grand Prix. It was definitely fast, but they don’t call it the Temple of Speed for nothing. 

“I’m sorry Mitch, the radio went out. What is my position?” 

“P-”

The radio scratched even worse than before. 

You pressed the button again. 

“P what? Mitch I’m sorry, I legit cannot understand you. I’ll see you in the garage?” 

The radio just kept crackling after that. You drove your car around the track once again before heading to the pits. Outside, you could see all the mechanics jumping up and down and the engineers hugging each other as your car got closer. 

Did Max get pole? You questioned to yourself. 

You guessed that they were super happy for not letting Ferrari be front row? You just wished you knew where you were starting today. Your car was parked and led into the garage. Multiple people were patting your helmet as you sat there, deactivating the steering wheel. 

Did you get P2? That had to be it. 

Once you were out of the car, you took your helmet off, eyebrows still scrunched as everyone was congratulating you. It was starting to weird you out, so you stepped out of the garage, trying to find your teammate. 

However, you passed by George and Lewis first. The taller Briton was smiling widely at you, which made your eyebrows pinch even more. 

George clapped you on the shoulder. “Great job out there! Congrats!” 

“So proud. You’re going to do great,” Lewis said as he gave you a side hug. 

“Uh, thank you?” 

You kept walking, trying to find Max, or maybe even Charles. 

Your wish was granted as you found the Dutchman and Monégasque, along with both papaya drivers. Their eyes were wide as you got closer. Lando almost bulldozed you over in a giant hug. Your hand patted his back as you were stiff, still not knowing what the hell was going on. 

Once Lando let you go, Max brought you into a side hug. Your hand patted his back in congrats. 

“Good job for pole mate.” You sipped your water. 

The four around you went eerily quiet. Your head cocked, looking around. 

“Everyone ok?” 

Your eyes flitted around the pit, while the men just stared. Your phone buzzed, but you only looked at the time and not the multiple posts and tags from Instagram and every other social media you had. 

Your eyes were still glued to the phone when you asked, “Can someone tell me what position I’m in? The radio on my car was super scratchy and I couldn’t hear Mitch.” 

Max was about to respond, but a random interviewer came up to the five of you. The group put on their camera smiles as the man began to ask the drivers questions. You were confused when the man didn’t ask anything about pole to Max when he brought up tomorrow’s race. Well, that was, until he turned to you. 

“How does it feel to have you first pole position?” 

The mic was shoved in your direction. Your face went blank and the world went silent. 

“What?” 

The man kind of rolled his eyes. “You have just become the youngest pole sitter in Formula 1 history. How are you feeling right now?” 

Your eyes widened as you took in the question. You were now hyper aware of Max’s hand on your back, where he had left it after your side hug. 

“Uh, great?” 

The men around you snickered. You looked around, even more confused. 

“This is actually the first I’m hearing about this,” you continued, “I thought that Max was on pole.” 

The man let out a small laugh before thanking you for your time. Your eyes were still wide as Max led you back to the garage, where the cheers got even louder. A second water was placed in your hands as you got closer to Mitch. 

She turned to you once she noticed you were back and brought you into a big hug. You started laughing as you squeezed her tightly. 

“What’s with the giggles?” she asked, trying not to laugh herself. 

“I thought Max was on pole. My radio was super scratchy and I couldn’t hear you. Some random journalist was the one to tell me!” you exclaimed over the celebrations in the garage. 

Vito came to you next and brought you into a side hug. You inhaled deeply as his arms enveloped you in a safe space. 

You whispered, “I did it. I really did it.” 

His hand came up to ruffle your hair. “Always knew you could kid. Always.” 

Next was Christian who, like Vito, bear hugged you. He patted your head during the hug. You sighed contently in his arms. 

“Is it nap time now?” you questioned, making everyone laugh. 

Christian spoke up. “We have debrief and then you can go back to the hotel to sleep. I think there’s a surprise for you.” 

Now that did it. Your leg bounced up and down the entire meeting. You mentally tried to will Christian to hurry up, but he kept on going. The minute the meeting was done, you bolted out of your seat. 

Sadly, your car was being transported for tomorrow, so you couldn’t go very fast. And besides, you had taken an uber, thinking that they would have gone much faster. Yet, their version of fast was nowhere near your version. When the car finally stopped, you quickly thanked the driver and threw some money at him, not even waiting for the change. 

The elevator also thought it would be good to give you a lesson in patience as well, as someone before you had pressed all the buttons – making you stop on every floor. You groaned as it stopped once more at the floor below yours. The moment the door opened up to your floor, you all but ran down to your room. 

Your key card almost fell out of your hands as you were trying to get the door open. It flew wide as you finally got the thing to work. You ran to the empty room. Your eyebrows pinched for what felt like the thousandth time that day. Your eyes flitted around, but didn’t land on anything special. 

“Maybe Christian got it wrong?” you asked yourself as you jumped on the bed, face forward. 

What or who you failed to notice was a lanky Monegasque creeping out of your closet. Arthur watched as you deeply inhaled into the pillows, eyes fluttering shut. He almost felt bad for what he was about to do. 

Key word: almost. 

He quietly inhaled before launching onto the bed. A scream left your lips at the arrival of unneeded body weight on you. Your went stiff as your mind raced. This was it. Some crazy fan had gotten into your room somehow and was about to strangle you. Your arms flailed as you tried to hit the intruder. 

Except, you stopped once you heard a familiar laugh. You gasped as you rolled over to find you boyfriend’s face in yours. The two of you looked at each other for a bit, gasping for air (you from holding your breath and him from laughing so much). 

Arthur suddenly dipped his head, going in for a kiss. Yet, you had other plans. 

You smacked his face. Arthur froze as he was halfway down, lips still puckered. 

“Well that hurt.” 

You rolled your eyes. 

“Sorry for thinking I was about to be killed Thur. That wasn’t nice,” you whined. “And I was about to sleep and now I’m not tired anymore.” 

Arthur smirked. “Maybe I can make you tired another way?” 

Hit. 

“I deserved that.” 

You scoffed. “Max is right in the room next to us. He would hang me if he heard.” 

Arthur huffed before putting his full weight on you, face in your neck. You let out a soft oof as the air was a bit knocked out of you. Your arms came up and wrapped around his neck. The two of you basked in each other’s presence for a bit, before a soft kiss was placed on your neck. 

You whispered, “No marks please.” 

You felt his lips trail up until they hit the bottom of where you ear was. A soft gasp left your lips as he kissed from there to your lips. His hands started rubbing at your sides and he finally placed his lips on yours. 

Your mouth opened just a bit, letting him in. Your hands made their way to his hair, fingers bunching the dirty blond strands. Arthur let out a please groan at the motion, which made him kiss you a bit harder. Your legs wrapped around his waist as he kept pressing his body onto yours, the pressure making a whine escape from your throat. 

The two of you had to part for a breath, but only for a second until you placed your lips back on his. His hands wandered up your torso, now exploring under your shirt. His lips were firmly on yours as he pressed into you harder. 

A loud moan escaped from under his lips, making him smirk into the kiss. 

When Arthur finally deemed you more relaxed, he leaned back, watching you gasp for air. Your head rested against the pillow as Arthur slid next to you. He arms were still wrapped around your middle.

He gave one more kiss to your neck, before whispering, “My pole sitter. I’m so proud of you.” 

Your eyes began to flutter shut, mind sinking into a deep sleep. 

Sunday morning came too quickly. Arthur had to almost drag you out of bed. That almost was an understatement: he did drag you out of bed. 

You had picked out a nice gray pant suit for today, something that Mitch had given you as a present. You had always loved all of her pant suits and tried to complement her whenever you could. 

Your phone buzzed with a notification that your car had arrived safely and it was waiting for you, and Arthur outside. Max wanted to come with you, but it was a hyper car and it only two seats. With your sunnies on, you stepped out of the hotel. Thankfully, there weren’t any fans waiting for the two of you. 

The V12 engine roared to life as you started the car up. You made sure that Arthur had on the seatbelt before you even started to move. The car came with two headsets so that you and the passenger could talk to each other. 

“Did you know that this is my first time driving this car on the road?” 

“What?” 

You didn’t answer him and kept on driving. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw him grip the sides even more. You giggled as you continued through the Italian streets. At stop lights, people seemed to scramble for their phones, wanting to take pictures. 

You revved the engine as you got close to the paddock. The car was definitely loud and turned a lot of heads. Yet, people really couldn’t see who was in the car. 

A big group of the drivers were waiting for you and Arthur at the entrance before they went in. Charles’s head was the first to whip around at the sound of a Ferrari V12 engine. 

Lewis let out a loud whistle as the orange spaceship came closer. Lando and Oscar’s mouths were open wide. Alex and Logan just stood staring. 

“Whose car is that?” Carlos questioned, watching the car rev for a few more rounds. 

Max stood to the side with a giant smirk on his face. The cameras around them were all pointed to the futuristic car. 

Charles cocked his head. “Isn’t that the car that Y/n wanted at some point? Someone should call her and tell her it’s here.” 

Max laughed loudly, causing the group to look at him weirdly. 

He answered Charles, “Mate I think she already knows.” 

His finger came up and pointed at the car, door already opened with you stepping out. Their jaws dropped as Arthur also stepped out, grabbing his and your bags. You waved to the group, only getting half waves in reply. You giggled as you handed someone the key, only trusting a select few to park it. 

“Hello boys,” you said as you stepped closer. 

They were all silent, eyes still on the car. 

“When do I get a ride?” Logan asked first, breaking the silence. An uproar of the rest asking followed after that. 

Another giggle escaped your lips as you waved your hands, silencing them. 

“So, no matter how today turns out, I’m having a house party down in Capris after the race. Max said we can take his jet. Everyone on the grid is invited, except you know who.” 

A smirk formed on your face as you left, scanning your card at the turnstile. The males followed in suit, now excitedly talking about the party. 

redbullracing has posted

redbullracing and how are we feeling today? "Uh, great?"

liked by y/n.89, arthur_leclerc, monza_tifosi, lechair, and 309,204 others

y/n.nation I have no words - wow, just wow

losingmy_everlovingmind UM THE CAR? ARTHUR? HELLO??

y/n.89 guys it wasn't my fault, I just didn't know I was on pole - admin how could you

redbullracing it was max's idea maxverstappen1 HEY

charlos4ever guys, Charles win 2024?

rookie_on_top nah Y/n win 2024 y/n&co here here

f1 lets go racing!

The red and yellow crowd roared as you walked by, waving to everyone. You thought that there would be a lot of booing, but surprisingly there was little to none. The crowds seemed to adore you, just as they adored their Ferrari boys. 

At the garage, you had finally found out that Max had gotten P3 in a Ferrari sandwich, namely Charles in P2 and Carlos in P4. 

You were nervous as you sat in your Red Bull. This could be it. This could be your winning moment. 

Or this could end up like Suzuka. Another win in your grasps and then ripped from your hands. 

“Radio check kid?” 

“Mitch, I’m scared.” 

The older woman frowned as she sat at the pit wall. That didn’t sound like you. Your voice sounded so young and so scared, almost like a toddler who was scared of the dark. Mitch took a deep breath. 

“Kid, listen to me. You are so amazing. Your car breathes the same air that you breath. You just need to focus and be one with the car. You have to be speed. Remember, you eat losers for breakfast.” 

A small laugh came over the radio, making Mitch smile. 

“One winner, nineteen losers. I eat them for breakfast.” 

“Go get them kid.” 

“And it’s lights out and away we go at the 2024 Italian Grand Prix!” 

You focused on your breathing as you flew down the straights and suddenly slowed at the corners. There was a reason that this was one of the hardest tracks. The G-force of the straights into the corners was hell. 

Your head felt as though it was being ripped off as you went around the turns. Thankfully, you were still leading by midpoint. You were on a one stop strategy, and you needed to pit soon. However, you got the call for a yellow flag. 

“Who was it Mitch?” 

“Max clipped a kerb. He’s fine, but the bottom of his car is ripped. We’re taking this flag to pit you, so come on in.” 

You heart sank as you thought of your teammate. It was just you now to bring home some points. Your breathing got a little fast as you came to pit, watching the hordes of people with bright red flags. You were able to come out in first place once again. But you were alone this time. Not teammate to help if needed.

A lone bull in a sea of red capes. 

Your pace was phenomenal. Every time people thought a driver would catch up to you, you would manage to pull away. 

The final lap flag waved and your stomach jumped to your throat. You crisply cut the corners, managing you tyres and car. Only a few more turns to go. You could almost taste it. 

Max, along with the rest of the team, were jumping and cheering, willing your car to take you to the end. As the Dutchman watched you get closer and closer, he rushed out of the garage and climbed onto the fence.  

“Y/n L/n has the checkered flag in her sights. The world has thrown everything at her, yet she still rises. Today, she joins the elite group of drivers who get to say that they have won a Formula 1 race. The first woman this century to score points, the first woman to step foot on the podium, and the first woman to reach that top pedestal. Her hunger had turned starving, yet she will finally be satiated today.”

Drivers say that when they’re in the car, everything moves in slow motion. 

You watched your crew’s arms slowly jest up and down as you approached the line. When your car finally crossed, everything went silent. Your mind was thrown back to your first karting win. 

How everyone was silent as you stood on that top step. A tear trickled down your face in your helmet. This time, you knew there wouldn’t be any silence. 

The noise would be deafening.  

“SHE DNF-ED AT SPA, PODIUMED AT ZANDVOORT, AND WON AT MONZA. Y/N L/N IS THE WINNER OF THE 2024 ITALIAN GRAND PRIX.”

“You’ve done it!” Mitch screamed over the radio. You however, couldn’t understand yourself over your screams. Word vomit just came out of your mouth. Words in English and Italian sputtered out. 

“AAHHHH THE HECK. WHAT EVEN! NON POSSO CREDER! AAHHHHHHHH! THANK YOU EVERYONE!” 

Being the first one into Parc Ferme was a surreal experience. Normally, you’d be following someone in, but you were the one to lead. 

You stayed in your car for just a moment, taking in deep breaths and trying to will the tears away. Yet, they kept on coming. You quickly took your steering wheel off before getting out of the car on the nose. You raised your fists as you stood. 

The crowds were roaring and your head was spinning. You placed your fingers on your helmet before raising them up to the bright blue sky. 

The two yellow and red clad drivers watched on behind you as you celebrated. If it couldn’t be them, they were glad that it was you. 

You jumped down from the nose and immediately ran to the barriers and into your team’s open arms. You felt their hands rain down on your helmet and back in congratulations. In the sea of team, your eyes finally found bright blue ones to the side. 

Max had come around the little gate to hug your properly. You all but ran and jumped on him. Your legs lifted around his hips as he hugged you tightly. 

The Dutchman could hear your sobs from under your helmet. His large hands gripped you a bit tighter and held you close. Your fingers gripped the back of his Red Bull polo, not wanting to let go. Yet, you knew that you had to, so you slowly slid back down to the floor. 

Max looked into your eyes through your visor. His lips were moving, but you couldn’t really tell what he was saying. He gently turned you around in the direction of your team principal. He lightly pushed you toward Christian, and you took that moment to jog over to him. 

Much like with Max, you kind of jumped on the Briton, making him pick you up slightly. 

“I did it Dad. I’m on the top step.” 

Christian barely heard you, but he squeezed you a bit tighter once you said that. He set you back down and helped you get your helmet off. He was met with the sight of tears running down your face and your hair being plastered to your forehead with sweat. He led you over to get weighed and then place your helmet on the number 1 pedestal. 

You were quickly interviewed before going to the cooldown room. There you met Charles and Carlos.

The Monegasque was the first one to wrap you in a hug. It was nice, but you really wanted the hug of another Monegasque. 

“Siamo cosi orgogliosi di te, ragazzo. Finalmente sul grandino piu alto,” he whispered, before sending you to Carlos. 

There was little time in the cooldown room before the three of you were called to the podium. Your hat fit nicely, the number 1 on the side beaming. Carlos went first, then Charles, and then finally you. Your eyes squinted as you met the bright Italian sun. 

The crowds cheered below as you stood on the top step. Your tears returned as they played your national anthem. You didn’t try to wipe them this time though. 

You let them fall. 

The Austrian anthem played after and trophies were handed out. 

Once the metal was placed in your hands, you raised it up high. The people closest to you knew the significance of it all. The win in Lorenzo’s home country. Your win for him. 

Charles knew all the emotions. He too had won at Monza for his papa and Jules. Pierre down in the crowd let some tears shed as he remembered his time up there, winning for Anthoine. Daniel watched in amazement as you held the trophy high before kissing it lightly. There was a time that he was on that step, clad in orange and blue. You were shining. 

The taste of the bubbly had never been sweeter. After spraying Charles and Carlos, and getting theirs dumped all over you, it was your turn to spray your team. You tried to point the spray down at Max and Arthur, who had snuck into the sea of navy. Your boyfriend was currently looking up at you, as if you hung the stars. And right now, the sun was making you glow so hard that he truly believed that you might have. 

The celebrations didn’t end after that. 

In the group chat that you made, excluding one driver, there was only one message to the drivers. It made them all smirk with excitement. 

Grid Queen:  airmax leaves at 4  see you all in Capris  p.s. bring your girlfriends 

redbullracing has posted

redbullracing Y/N L/N IS THE WINNER OF THE 2024 MONZA GRAND PRIX

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y/n.nation LETS GOOOOOOOOO

box_box_express what a race - I'm speechless

formulalalala1 FIRST WOMAN TO EVER WIN A FORMULA 1 GRAND PRIX WHAT IS SHE

y/n&co the greatest rookie to ever cross the face of formula 1

y/n.89 I think I'm still crying, thank you admin

redbullracing love you too rookie!

iamred_iamyellow oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh

f1_fan and everyone liked that

y/n.89 has posted (max is second pic)

y/n.89 I really don't know what to say other than thank you. you all have put so much confidence in my and my abilities and I'm thankful that it's finally paying off. To everyone, I love you - let's get this bread

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landonorris knew you could do it bug!

carlossainz55 ah chica, you did marvelous maxverstappen1 words cannot tell how proud of you I am geitje fernandoalo_official nina, you're going to make me retire early oscarpiastri roo, you've done good danielricciardo welcome to the league darl' lewishamilton you drove oh so well love charles_leclerc gosse, you never cease to surprise me logansargeant lets go champ! knew you could do it georgerussell63 you did it again sweetie alex_albon super duper proud (lily is crying) y/n.89 y'all made me cryyyyyy

author this entire post has my heart

y/n.89 thank you for making it happen

*comments have been limited*

arthur_leclerc has posted

arthur_leclerc loving her was red and navy

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*comments have been limited*

Race Results (top 10 + DNF) 

Y/n L/n – 26 points (fastest lap) 

Charles Leclerc – 18 points 

Carlos Sainz – 15 points 

Oscar Piastri – 12 points 

George Russell – 11 points 

Lewis Hamilton – 8 points 

Alex Albon – 6 points 

Logan Sargeant – 4 points 

Daniel Ricciardo – 2 points 

Yuki Tsunoda – 1 point 

Max Verstappen – DNF 

Champions Standings 

Max Verstappen – 309 points 

Charles Leclerc – 286 points 

Y/n L/n – 207 points 

Lando Norris – 190 points 

Carlos Sainz – 145 points 

Oscar Piastri – 130 points 

Lewis Hamilton – 113 points 

George Russell – 65 points 

Alex Albon – 62 points

Fernando Alonso – 45 points 

Logan Sargeant – 40 points 

Daniel Ricciardo – 25 points 

Lance Stroll – 17 points 

Valtteri Bottas – 13 points 

Pierre Gasly – 12 points 

Yuki Tsunoda – 9 points

Zhou Guanyu – 1 point 

Nico Hulkenberg 

Kevin Magnussen 

Esteban Ocon 

Constructors Standings 

Red Bull – 516 points 

Ferrari – 431 points 

McLaren – 320 points 

Mercedes – 178 points 

Williams – 102 points 

Aston Martin – 62 points 

Alpha Tauri – 34 points 

Alpha Romeo – 14 points 

Alpine – 12 points 

Haas – 0 points 

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[anonymousewrites]

A Not-So-Disastrous Romance (Book 1) Chapter Twenty-Four

Kusuo Saiki x Reader

Chapter Twenty-Four: Celebrations

Summary: (Y/N) meets Saiki's grandfather, and his friends celebrate his birthday.

Mouse Note: Thank you so much for everyone's support on this series, it means the world to me. Don't worry, the story isn't over, we'll return to Saiki and MC soon, but first I'm going to have an AOS! Logos and Pathos book and then a One Hell of a Love book and maybe some other things going on. I hope you guys enjoyed, I was super surprised by the support of this book, but it was so wonderful, and I hope you guys like this end

            (Y/N) walked through the shopping center, humming along to the song playing in their earbuds. They had gotten all the ingredients and supplies to try making macarons, so now all that was left was to go home and make them.

            Should I bring them to school and hand them out to people? thought (Y/N). In that case, I should get some bags to put them in.

            They paused as they passed a sad-looking man sitting dejectedly on a bench. “Excuse me, sir, are you lost?” they asked, stepping forward.

            “Huh?” The grey-haired man looked up. “What do you want?” he said grumpily.

            “I was wondering if I could help you at all,” said (Y/N), still friendly. They were used to people being rougher around the edges—Saiki was like that.

            “I don’t need any help. Leave me alone,” huffed the man.

            In a store nearby, Saiki was struck by a sudden feeling—something was going on with his grandfather. While his mother watched his grandmother try on teenager’s clothing, Saiki slipped out to check on his grandfather. He rounded a corner to look at where Grandpa Saiki had been left to fend for himself. Saiki nearly groaned. (Y/N) was speaking to him. Somehow, his family—weird as they were—kept meeting (Y/N). (Yes, his parents both liked (Y/N), but this was his tsundere grandfather. He couldn’t let (Y/N) get scared off by Grandpa Saiki’s outward rudeness). Saiki needed to intervene before Grandpa Saiki hurt (Y/N)’s feelings.

            “Well, sir, you look lost, and I don’t want to leave you to fend for yourself. Are you positive you’re alright?” asked (Y/N), smiling. “I know Shibuya can be a bit confusing sometimes. I got lost the first few times I visited.”

            Grandpa Saiki stared at (Y/N), still so friendly despite him being rude. “…I’m just waiting for my family. They went in without me.”

            “That’s too bad,” said (Y/N).

            “I fought with my grandson,” admitted Grandpa Saiki.

            Saiki stared in shock. (Y/N) had easily gotten along with Grandpa Saiki. It seemed everyone they met liked (Y/N) (or almost all). Not that Saiki could blame anyone. He liked them for a reason (innumerable reasons, actually).

            “That’s too bad,” said (Y/N), sitting down next to Grandpa Saiki.

            “He’s seventeen years old, and he’s my adorable grandson,” said Grandpa Saiki sadly.

            “You seem to care about him a lot,” said (Y/N).

            “But we fought, and now he doesn’t like me,” said Grandpa Saiki.

            “I’m sure he still cares about you,” said (Y/N) encouragingly. “Families have little quarrels all the time. You just have to make it up to him so that he knows you’re sorry about it all.”

            “But how?” said Grandpa Saiki.

            “A gift is always appreciated,” said (Y/N). “And if you want, I could help you pick something out. Your grandson and I are the same age, so maybe we have similar interests.”

            Saiki watched all of this unfold, dumbfounded. Grandpa Saiki was never so reasonable, and somehow, (Y/N) was handling him like any other person—easily, kindly. Curious, Saiki followed (Y/N) and Grandpa Saiki as they walked into a store.

            “What does your grandson like?” asked (Y/N). “Clothes, accessories, games, sweets?”

            “I’m not sure,” said Grandpa Saiki. “I know that he wears barrettes and glasses with all of his outfits and that he likes when my wife bakes.”

            (Y/N) chuckled. “He sounds like my friend. He really likes sweets and has glasses.”

            You’re so observant and yet so oblivious, thought Saiki fondly.

            (Y/N) led Grandpa Saiki to the grocery aisle of the store to show him the options for sweets. “There are brownies, cupcakes, coffee jellies, candy, all sorts of things. What do you think?”

            “Hm…I’m not sure,” said Grandpa Saiki. “What does your friend like?”

            (Y/N) laughed. “Well, my friend is really unique and has an obsession with coffee jelly. But I don’t know if every teenager has the same tastes as Kusuo.”

            Grandpa Saiki perked up. “Kusuo? As in Kusuo Saiki?”

            “Yeah,” said (Y/N), nodding.

            “That’s my grandson,” said Grandpa Saiki. I met one of my beloved grandson’s friends!

            “Really?” (Y/N) laughed. “What a coincidence! I’m his friend, (Y/N) (L/N).”

            “It’s nice to meet any of my grandson’s friends,” said Grandpa Saiki.

            You’re only saying that because you met (Y/N). They’re the best of my friends, thought Saiki. They’re the one he loved.

            “It’s a pleasure to meet his family,” said (Y/N), bowing politely. They grinned. “And now you know exactly what to get him!” They nodded to the coffee jelly. “Get him some coffee jelly and he’ll forgive you for anything.”

            “Thank you,” said Grandpa Saiki, picking up a package. “You’ve been a great help,” he said as they headed towards the counter to pay.

            “Of course,” said (Y/N). “Tell Kusuo I say, ‘hi!’ ” They bowed. “And, again, it was nice meeting you.” With a final wave, they headed off.

            Saiki watched his grandfather pay for the package and walked out. Somehow, this situation had turned in Saiki’s favor.

            When (Y/N) is involved, everything gets better.

            That night, as he ate his grandfather’s apology, he smiled and thought of (Y/N)’s kindness.

l

            Saiki sighed as he got up to leave class. Everyone had been bothering him today. Even minor characters like Amp and Kusuke had made an appearance. The cameos were off the charts, and Saiki knew that meant trouble, so he wanted to escape.

            Additionally, though, people had been acting strangely around him. His friends (bothers) weren’t hanging around quite as closely as normal and avoiding being around him. Ordinarily, that would be a good thing, but…

            “Hey, pal, let’s go home together. The runt says we should talk about tomorrow,” said Nendou.

            “Wha—?!” Kuboyasu stared at Nendou in alarm.

            “You idiot!” said Kaidou. “What are you doing?! That’s not what we planned.”

            “Huh? But it’s my pal’s—”

            “Shut up! Let’s go,” said Kaidou, dragging Nendou towards the door.

            “Come on, you guys,” said (Y/N), ushering them away. “Bye, Kusuo! See you tomorrow!”

            Saiki sighed. With his telepathy, he knew exactly what was going on, and despite his current respite from their bothersome schemes, it was just going to come around and become an even bigger problem for him in the long run.

Yare yare.

l

            “Nendou made me nervous,” said Kaidou as he looked out the window with the group by his side.

            “He almost ruined our plan,” said Hairo, shaking his head.

            “You almost ruined it, too, Chiyo,” warned Teruhashi.

            “I let my guard down. I’ll be more careful,” said Yumehara.

            “So where’s Nendou?” asked Kuboyasu.

            “I sent him home. With his brain, he can’t keep up with this plan,” said Kaidou.

            “That’s for the best,” said Hairo.

            “We’ve been preparing this for a week,” said Kaidou gravely. “We can’t afford to fail.” He unraveled the plans. The top read “Operation: Surprise Birthday Party for Kusuo Saiki.” “We can’t afford to fail. Now, let’s start the strategy meeting…for Operation Surprise Saiki, which is taking place tomorrow!”

            (Y/N) shook their head and chuckled. They had tried to intercede, but at this point, they were going to let the plan go through. They’re all put too much work into it.

            “Tomorrow, after school, Aren and I will lure Saiki to the location of the party, which is my house,” said Kaidou. “We won’t talk about his birthday at all. When we get to my house, I’ll go get something to drink, Aren will take him to the room. When the time seems right, Aren will set off a cracker. That’ll be the signal to say, ‘Happy Birthday!’ Then, I’ll bring out the birthday cake, and the surprise will be a big success. I wonder what the look on his face will be…”

            Poor Kusuo. (Y/N) smiled to themself. Hopefully he’ll remember they all have good intentions. I mean, even if his birthday is actually in August…

            Outside the door, Saiki sighed as everyone went on and on about their excitement and the gifts they prepared. At this point, he couldn’t tell them they had the wrong day. Not when Kaidou read aloud his proclamation of friendship. Not when (Y/N) was involved and so happy (even if he did wonder why they hadn’t corrected everyone about his birthday).

            A little smile appeared on Saiki’s face. Yare yare. So troublesome, and yet he was willing to put up with them. For some reason, anyway.

l

            “Saiki went home?!” cried Kaidou.

            “Yeah,” said Kuboyasu grimly.

            “I warned you, he likes to leave school as soon as possible,” chuckled (Y/N).

            “What do we need to do now?” said Kaidou.

            “Do we put a stop to it?” wondered Kuboyasu.

            “Not after all this time. Time for plan beta!” said Kaidou.

            “We have a plan beta?” wondered (Y/N).

            Sure enough, the entire group—Yumehara, Mera, Kaidou, Kuboyasu, (Y/N), Hairo, and Teruhashi—was soon crouching around the corner from Saiki’s house.

            “I’ll explain again,” said Kaidou. “First, we ring Saiki’s doorbell. When he comes out, we all pull the crackers. The Emotional Saiki Plan.”

            “What if someone else answers?” asked Kuboyasu.

            “We will explain it and make them let us in,” said Kaidou. “Let’s go!”

            The group headed towards the door and rang the doorbell. (Y/N) smiled and shook their head. Whoever opened the door, they knew Saiki had a trick up his sleeve. Going along with something so steeped in emotions was not Saiki’s way.

            The door swung open, and Saiki stood there.

            “Surprise!” called everyone, cracking the crackers.

            Saiki’s eyes widened in surprise, and he smiled. “What? What is this?”

            “Today’s your birthday, right?” said Teruhashi brightly.

            “Yes, but…”

            Aha. (Y/N) giggled behind their hand. That wasn’t Saiki. It was Mr. Saiki since today was his birthday.

            “We came to celebrate your birthday!” said Hairo.

            “Wow, really?!” said Mr. Saiki, beaming from Saiki’s face. It was odd to see it, but (Y/N) at least could see through it. “You know my birthday?”

            “Of course, Saiki,” said Kaidou.

            “ ‘Saiki?’ ” repeated Mr. Saiki, still happy.

            “Hey, pal!” Nendou walked up. “I heard it’s your birthday!” He held up a watermelon.

            “Nendou, you came, too?” said Mr. Saiki.

            “He managed it,” said Kaidou, nodding.

            “Come on in, all of you,” said Mr. Saiki.

            “Thanks, Saiki!” said Yumehara, heading it.

            Wow, no one has noticed how differently “Kusuo” is acting, thought (Y/N).

            “You seem to be enjoying yourself, (Y/N),” said Teruhashi curiously. “You keep smiling and laughing.”

            “I’m just having a really good time,” chuckled (Y/N).

            It’s still going? thought Saiki. He had thought this would end quickly.

            “Thank you all so much,” said Mr. Saiki. “I would never have expected Kusuo’s friends to celebrate my birthday. I’m deeply moved.”

            (Y/N) coughed at the mention of “Kusuo’s friends,” but luckily, no one seemed to notice.

            “You’re our friend,” said Mera.

            “Happy birthday,” said Hairo.

            “Yes, Saiki!” said Kaidou. “By the way, Saiki, are your parents here?”

            “My parents don’t live with us,” said Mr. Saiki.

            “Whoa, really?” said Hairo.

            “My mother lives in the family home, and my father is no longer with us,” said Mr. Saiki.

            He’s walking right into trouble with that one, thought (Y/N). They decided to step in. “Oh, yeah, he’s traveling for work right now.”

            I’m glad someone has worked it out and is helping.

            “What? No, he’s—”

            “Come upstairs,” said Saiki directly to his father’s mind.

            “Huh? Is that Kusuo?” wondered Mr. Saiki.

            “Kusuo?” repeated Kuboyasu.

            “I need to head upstairs for a moment,” said Mr. Saiki awkwardly, leaving the room.

            Alright, I’ll hold down the fort. I wonder what Saiki’ll do now. Have his dad continue the party or end it or…actually come down himself? (Y/N) hoped he would. Even if it wasn’t his birthday, they wanted to spend some time with him and give him the present. All of his friends did.

            Upstairs, Saiki explained the situation to his father, who nodded.

            “Oh, I see. That’s what I thought. I thought it was strange,” said Mr. Saiki.

            “You were totally into it,” said Saiki.

            “The surprise is over, so you want to switch places?” said Mr. Saiki.

            “No. Keep going,” said Saiki, giving a thumbs up.

            “You want me to keep going?!” exclaimed Mr. Saiki.

            “It’s not my birthday. I can’t pretend it is,” said Saiki, pushing his father back down the stairs.

            “I’m not you, Kusuo. I can’t pretend that I am. I think (L/N) already figured it out,” said Mr. Saiki.

            “They did. They’re observant. But they won’t say anything,” said Saiki. “I’m counting on you.” I can’t respond to their kindness.

            Pretend to be Kusuo, thought Mr. Saiki, standing before the door. He opened it. “Yare yare. Sorry for the wait. Yare yare.”

            I don’t say yare yare that much.

            “We’re sorry for interrupting your birthday while your father is away,” said Kaidou.

            “Oh, it’s fine. He’s coming back today,” said Mr. Saiki quickly.

            He’s really not like Kusuo at all, thought (Y/N).

            “And why’d you used the term ‘not with us?’ ” said Kuboyasu. “That sounds like he’s dead.”

            “You shouldn’t talk about your dad that way,” said Hairo, shaking his head.

            “M-My apologies,” said Mr. Saiki.

            “Well, anyway,” said Teruhashi, trying to break in.

            “Look, we finished the cake!” said Yumehara brightly, holding up the box.

            “It turned out great,” said Teruhashi.

            “Especially the face,” agreed Yumehara.

            They took the cake out and put it on the table. It was all smooshed and melted.

            “Oh, no,” the girls said, deflating.

            Oh dear, thought (Y/N) sympathetically. It’s so hard to shape cakes and keep them looking good.

            They should have gotten (Y/N) to help them.

            “It got smashed in the transit,” said Teruhashi in disappointment.

            “But you made it with lots of love, so that’s what matters,” said (Y/N).

            “What?! Love?! No, no! It’s just friendship! A friendship birthday cake! Besides, Chiyo made it with me! We put a ton of work in together!” rambled Teruhashi in a panic.

            “We’ll make another,” said Yumehara, looking at Mr. Saiki. “I swear, it looked perfect!”

            There’s no choice.

            “Wow, look! The cake is reforming!” said Hairo, staring at the cake.

            “The sponge cake is rebounding,” said Kuboyasu.

            Thank you, Kusuo, thought (Y/N). They knew he’d save his friends’ feelings after they worked so hard for him even if misguided).

            “Wow, this is amazing,” said Mr. Saiki, looking at the Saiki-shaped cake. “It looks delicious.”

            That is something Kusuo would say, thought (Y/N), grinning.

            “Just wait, you’ll really be moved!” said Mera.

            “We have a surprise for you,” said Kuboyasu. “A video letter—”

            Mera held up the camera, and Nendou’s face hit it. It fell to the ground, broken.

            “Oh,” said (Y/N), disappointed since Mera and Kuboyasu had worked hard on it.

            “Oh, no, that’s no good,” said Mr. Saiki.

            “Sorry, Saiki.” Kuboyasu took off his glasses. “Go on. Hit me. Everyone, hit me.”

            “Kuboyasu, there’s really no need for that,” said (Y/N) quickly. “It was an accident.”

            Yare yare.

            “Hey, look! It’s working,” said Kaidou, staring at the TV screen as it displayed the video letter.

            “It’s fixed,” said Hairo in happy amazement.

            “Alright!” said Kaidou. “Raise a glass and let’s start the feast.”

            “Cheers!” Everyone lifted their glasses.

            The party was in full swing. (Y/N) hung back since they felt awkward interacting with their crush’s father in such a context (also, they were disappointed Saiki himself wasn’t there), but everyone was having a great time. Some people armed wrestled, they joked, they laughed, and they bonded with one another—already a tight-knit friend group getting closer.

            Upstairs, Saiki sat and psychically monitored the party so that his dad didn’t screw anything up for his reputation or give away his psychic abilities.

            “Oh, there you are,” said Mr. Saiki, popping his face upstairs. “Your dad’s a star!”

            “Good for you.”

            “Well, you want to switch soon?” said Mr. Saiki.

            “No thanks. Hurry back now,” said Saiki. “I would only be a buzzkill.”

            “So what?”

            Saiki looked up at his dad in slight surprise.

            “Go on, Kusuo,” said Mr. Saiki. “You must feel some gratitude toward them. You didn’t want to hurt their feelings, so you asked me to cover for you. But that’s not right. They all came here for you, Kusuo. Even if you do hurt their feelings, you should go to them.” He turned and walked away.

            Saiki paused and watched him go. “Who are you to lecture me?” He stood.

            “I’m your father!” exclaimed Mr. Saiki.

            Saiki glanced at the stairs and walked down. He paused outside of the living room. Now, how do I get rid of them?

            “That was a huge success,” said Kaidou.

            “Saiki seemed really happy about everything,” agreed Teruhashi.

            “(Y/N), you didn’t give him his present,” said Yumehara.

            “I’ll give it to him later,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            “He seemed very energetic. He must have really liked all of this,” said Hairo.

            “Yes, but something didn’t seem quite right,” said Nendou.

            “That’s true. It’s like the walls around him are stronger than ever,” said Kaidou.

            “Maybe he was trying to hard to go along with us,” said Kuboyasu.

            “Oh, no, that’s terrible,” said Yumehara.

            “He should just be himself,” said Hairo.

            (Y/N) nodded. “We accept him how he is.” For who he really is.

            Yare yare. You’re the ones who are acting strange. Saiki opened the door.

            “Hey, pal, what took you so long?” Nendou grinned at him.

            “Saiki!” The group beamed at him.

            “Yare yare.” Saiki shook his head and sat down.

            He watched as everyone eagerly chatted and joked, leaving him a little more alone—not wanting him to “put up his walls again.”

            “Do you want a piece of cake?” said (Y/N), sitting down beside him and lifting a plate.

            “Yes,” said Saiki, instantly taking it and taking a bite.

            (Y/N) leaned in, smiled, and whispered, “Welcome to the party, Kusuo.”

            Saiki looked at them and nodded. Ah, well. He could avoid them all tomorrow. He supposed this wasn’t terrible.

l

            “Why didn’t you tell them it wasn’t my birthday?” asked Saiki. He floated the plates he was cleaning to (Y/N), who set them in the drying rack. “You know when my birthday is.” It wasn’t accusatory, just a plain question.

            “They made the whole plan before they even told me,” said (Y/N), shrugging. “At that point they’d put so much work into it that I couldn’t help but let it keep going.” They chuckled and nudged him. “Besides, that’s the exact same reason you let it go on.”

            “No, I just couldn’t convince them not to,” said Saiki.

            “Uh-huh,” said (Y/N), rolling their eyes with a laugh. “You know I see through you by now.”

            “See through me?”

            “Yep,” chirped (Y/N), grinning.

            Saiki looked at them, nearly asked them a question, and then stopped.

            “Oh, Kusuo, before I forget, I got you a gift,” said (Y/N), heading back into the living room.

            Saiki followed. “But it isn’t my birthday.”

            “I decided I might as well get into the spirit of things,” said (Y/N) brightly. They held up the present. “Tada! Open it up.”

            Saiki curiously opened the box and found a book(?) inside. He glanced up. This wasn’t a sweet or something themed on a sweet like (Y/N)’s usual gifts.

            “Look inside,” said (Y/N), grinning.

            Saiki lifted the album out and opened it. He stared. It was a photo. Of Café Mami. He turned the page. Now there was a photo of the sports festival, him running his race. Christmas with his friends. The beach. Okinawa. Karoake. London. Him having…fun. His friends with him. People celebrating, smiling.

            “I know you’re not big on being with people, but I know I really loved—liked having these moments with you,” said (Y/N). They smiled sheepishly. “So I guess this was partly a gift for me, but I, uh, I hope you can see these moments as fondly as I do.”

            Saiki looked between the photos and (Y/N). No. He wasn’t an extrovert. He didn’t seek others out. He found most incidents bothers. But…

            But.

            But in every one of these memories, there was something Saiki did like. Yes, he was…fond of his friends. This was the only moment he’d admit that. However, more importantly to Saiki, (Y/N) was in every one of those memories. They didn’t feature in any of the photos, but he knew they were behind the camera with a smile on their face. That was the reason Saiki instantly loved the photos. They held (Y/N)’s joy.

            And that was the reason Saiki loved them.

            “I love it, (Y/N),” said Saiki.

            (Y/N) beamed. “I’m glad.”

            “…I love it because you made it,” said Saiki. “You always put so much heart into what you make.”

            (Y/N) blushed. “Thanks, Kusuo.”

            “Even when I’m ungrateful, you’re still so kind,” said Saiki, stepping forward.

            (Y/N) looked at Saiki. “We’ve talked about this before, Kusuo, I don’t care that you’re not into words of affection. That doesn’t matter to me.”

            “It does. It does to me. Because you deserve to know that you’re a good friend and that I…I value you.” Saiki swallowed. This was it. “I like you, (Y/N).”

            (Y/N) started as they heard Saiki speak without telepathy. “You—You what?”

            “I like you,” repeated Saiki. “As…as more than a friend.”

            “You do?” A smile spread across (Y/N)’s face. “Really?”

            Saiki nodded jerkily.

            “Oh, Kusuo. I like you, too,” said (Y/N). They let out a joyful laugh. “I really, really like you, Kusuo. I have feelings for you.”

            “I do, too,” said Saiki. “I didn’t phrase it right.”

            “You phrased it just right,” said (Y/N), stepping up and taking Saiki’s hand daringly. They cleared their throat. “Can I-Can I kiss you, Kusuo?”

            Saiki looked at them, and he found that the idea of affection with them was as appealing as ever. He nodded and held their hand tighter.

            Saiki and (Y/N) leaned, hesitant, unsure of themselves, but perfectly comfortable with one another. They were willing to try something new with the person they loved.

            Their lips touched, and Saiki and (Y/N) pulled back for a moment. But the separation lasted for but a second as they leaned back in, kissing once more, more confidently, more eagerly.

            When they finally separated, (Y/N) and Saiki were both pink, and (Y/N) let out a little laugh at the rush of joy. Saiki felt their hand in his and gazed at the beautiful smile he had fallen for. There was only one thing he could say.

            “Oh, wow.”

Taglist:

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[the-adas]

being multigender is really hard for me bc it's a complex experience internally to start with. and then it's also a complex experience externally bc people's external interpretations will never really match the way you see yourself, and then there's the politics and bigotry of it and holy shit dude

you ever feel like everyone you know dislikes and/or downplays what feels like a critical part of who you are and you have no idea what to do about that

[pitchouna]

helloo, I will leave a request over here ♡ What about a Jealous Goku? Ty.

Jealous Goku x Reader!!

The jealous part will take a long time to appear! OKAYY SO HEY I'M SORRY FOR THE OTHER REQUESTS THAT ARE WAITING BUT I'M JUST SUPER DUPER BUSY💔💔 BUT I'M WORKING ON THEM NO WORRIES I'LL FINISH THEM SOON!! ENJOY< 33 Warnings: cursing Words: 3197

Goku is irritated. And when I say irritated, I mean very irritated. Earlier, while training, he decided he'll surprise you with an unexpected visit he actually wanted to cuddle with you so bad, but when he was home, he did not see you. And he looked everywhere. Checking if you were cooking, were having a bath, or just napping. He even checked in the toilets!! Not finding you made him grumpy. As he ran onto his son, Goten. "Oh! Dad! Aren't you training?" Goten asked him with his usually high-pitched voice. Goku just shook his head as he immediately wanted to ask him where you were. "Hey Goten, where's your mom? I don't see her anywhere!!" Goku spoke in an annoyed tone. "Oh mom? She went shopping with Bulma and C-18!" Goten answered earning a pat from his dad. "Thank you Goten. I owe you one! See ya!" Goku waved as he teleported living a confused Goten. "Why did he wanted to see mom?... Have I done something wrong?" Poor Goten started worrying hoping he won't get yelled at later. Even if he didn't do anything, we never know with you.

"KYAAAAAA!! WHAT THE FUCK !!??" You've screamed earning the attention of Bulma and C-18. They ran towards you and opened the curtain hiding you changing. And they see you, and Goku in a weird and tight position making both of the women yell. "What the fuck?? Care To explain Goku?!" Bulma yelled. Making Goku chuckle. "Yo ! Wanted to see Y/n for a moment!!"Goku explained. Not noticing you being choked in his chest due to the lack of space. "We don't care just release her look she's not breathing" C-18 said. "O-oops. Sorry Y/n hehe..." Goku chuckled getting out of the changing room which made other people seeing you half naked. You immediately closed the curtains, grateful only Women where in this shop. "Can't you warn when you'll join!!?" You've yelled behind the curtains, embatssed that Goku spawned while you were changing. And that some girls you don't know saw your body. "Hehe... Sorry Y/n... But I wanted to see you right now!! I just could not wait anymore!!" Goku explained to you making you sigh in irritation as you open the curtains now fullyclothed. "Well as you can see right now I'm not free to spend time with you. It has been a long time since I saw Bulma and C-18 because of me taking care of your ass." You spoke bluntly making some of the women laugh since they can hear your conversation. "Anyways you should go, this is a shop only allowed to Women. If you don't go away I'll call the security!" You've said wanting him to go as soon as possible. "This isn't kind Y/n!! It makes me feel you don't love me anymore.." He pouted, making his cute sad puppy eyes, that he used when he desperately wanted something. It always works.

"O-ouch that hurts Y/n!!" Goku whine as you drag his ear to the exit of the shop, and throw him outside. "See you this evening." You've said as you walk away, not giving him a chance to say anything. Goku just sighed, disappointed he didn't get to spend time with you right now. "her problem.. I won't allow her leaving the bed tonight.." Goku pouted irritated flying back home. "Hey Y/n... Wasn't that a little too harsh?" C-18 asked you, making both you and Bulma shocked. "What the hell? You're even worse than me and Y/n reunited when it come to Krillin!!" Bulma explained, making C-18 annoyed. "Me and Krillin is another story. Plus I didn't asked you." C-18 said making Bulma irritated as she was about to explode before you interrupted them. "Oh my god shut the fuck up girls!! Look how cute this top is!!" You've said as sparkles appear in your eyes, as you show them this crismon red Henley top, making them gasp. "Oh my god Y/n !!! Are there other colors??! I need it in purple!!" C-18 said in awe "I want it in blue too!!" Bulma exclaimed. "Yup, there are some right there!" You've pointed towards a cute special stand where there was a lot of cute tops and jeans, and Bulma and C-18 both saw the one they've searched for. "Wahhhh!! I'm in love with them! You have such a good eye when it comes to fashion Y/n!!" Bulma said making you Huff in pride. "Hehe now let's go try them on girls!!" C-18 said like a little child, making you both happy and giggling like teenage girls.

At the same time, a bored Saiyan was rolling over your shared King sized bed, whining non-stop about how he's bored. "How could Y/n do this to meee??.... For once I want to spend time with her and she doesn't want to!! Then I'll bet she'll complain when I'll just focus on training again!" Goku's making a fuss to himself like a big ass baby. "What do I do now?... Y/n will probably finish in some hours... But training do not excite me anymore right now..." Goku whines as he get off of the bed, going downstairs, making his way towards the kitchen. Opening the fridge, he sighs as he sees it's dead empty, and there's just one tomato left in there. "Pff...there's nothing else to eat too... I think I'll just nap right now..." Goku gave up searching something to do. Until an idea popped on his head. "Wooh! I bet Y/n won't be able to refuse my deal!! But I need to get money to do this... And Bulma will probably say no..." Goku started to think for the first time in his whole life. And he thought too much his head started burning, making smoke. "Oh!! Right! I still have some left over Zenis I've gained when I worked as a farmer!!" Goku exclaimed proud of his amazing idea, getting ready.

As Goku prepared to put his plan into action, he couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement building inside of him. For once, he would be the one in control in their relationship. He quickly got dressed and slipped on his casual clothes for once because he knows it makes you weak, feeling more confident than ever. As he stepped outside, he couldn't help but imagine the look of surprise and excitement that would undoubtedly appear on your face when you saw him. Now, it was his turn to make you feel happy. With a determined smile on his face, he teleported towards you, eager to start making his plan come to life. "Yo!" Goku said behind you which startled you. "Wahhhh!! Goku I've told you to warn me before appearing!! You scare me every damn time.." You've scolded him once again as he chuckled playfully. But something was off. You looked at him up and down and after 5 minutes of thinking you've realized he was in casual clothes. Which was very rare of him to drop his iconic orange gi.

"Oh? Is today a special day Goku? Why are you dressed like this??" You've asked curious which made Goku smile mischievously. "Since you didn't want to spend time with me earlier, I'm kidnapping you with me on a date!!" Goku said this with pride, which was very cute to see. "So... You're the one paying?" You've asked him smirking. And he nodded. "Alright !! I'll get ready!!" You've exclaimed excited to show him the new dress you bought with your girls earlier. "When do we go? And where do we join?" You've asked Goku which made him frown. "Huh? Why would you want to know that? We're going together right?" Goku said as confusion ran into his non-existant brain. "I want you to see me at the very last moment!! I'll be so gorgeous you'll fall in love with me once more." You've said confidently. "But I'm calling in love with you more everyday already?" Goku said so innocently that almost made you giggle and kicking your feet. But you were not a teenager any more, so you've controlled yourself and only blushed. "W-well it won't stop you to fall in love again." You've said not looking in his onyx eyes. Worried to show your teenager girl side that desperately wants to manifest itself. "Hehe. Fine! But you better be breath-taking!!" Goku smirked challenging you. "Oh yeah?! Challenge accepted!!" And with that, Goku gave you the hour and the place you both will meet up.

When the sun disappeared and the moon appeared, you were surprised to see what Goku has planned was a cute little picnic near a clear lake filled with petals of roses. There he was standing in what seemed a suit, he really wanted to impress you on this one. And it did. The sight was so breath-taking. The way his hair flowed through the wind, the sweet aroma of the roses mixed with the fresh scent of nature, and just the way the candles perfectly lit up the place was perfect. Goku sensed your presence and turned towards you "You're finally here Y/n! I was waiting for-" Goku just stopped talking. You looked ethereal. The way your hair was tied up in a side bun, with a rose to perfectly match your crismon red semi-long dress that flowed through the wind. The last time you saw Goku looking at you this way was the day of your wedding. "Woah.. Y/n.. You look so.. Gorgeous.." Goku struggled to find the perfect words to describe you as he walked towards you, helping you sit down the picnic mat. "So... Did I succeed making you fall in love with me once-more?" You've asked your husband who just responded you by cupping your cheek with a sweet and loving kiss, then saying "Is it possible to marry someone once more time?" he asked innocently making you laugh. "I wish it was. But it's not." You've answered making him pout. "Let's just start eating I'm hungry anyways.." He said. "What did you bring?" You've asked him, curious "I've brought sweets!! But we can always go somewhere else if you want to go-" You've just shushed him with your fingers, enjoying the moment you're both sharing.

On the way home, you've decided to walk around the city a little before just flying back home so the moment will last a little longer. But you both did not expected that this would ruin this perfect date. "Excuse me miss!! May I have a picture with you? You're just so beautiful!!" A child made it's way towards you and politely asked making you melt as you accepted. Goku feeling the warmth of your hand gone, as you had to stop holding his hand to take the picture, made him pout... But that was just the beginning. Immediately when you came back, you were interrupted again. "Hello!! May I ask where you bought your dress? It's beautiful!!" A woman younger than you asked so nicely that you forgot to take Goku's hand. "Of course!! Here I've bought it at "_____" The woman thanked you and made her way towards the shop as you waved her. You've turned towards Goku and spoke. "So what were we talking about-" This time, it was a little girl who interrupted you. She just poked your side shyly and it made you melt once more. "H-here.. Take this rose... It's as beautiful as you..." The little girl shyly said making you blush... "Thank you little one!! That's very cute of you!!" You've thanked her taking the rose in your hands enjoying the nice scent of it. Her mother took her and apologized for her interruption and you've just brushed it off saying it was alright. But it wasn't, for the Saiyan that is starting to get irritated. Pouting and tapping his feet as he's waiting for you to get finished. Just as you were about to come back, other people gave you flowers, coupons for free food at restaurants, (which Goku did not really mind tbh) some asked you how are you so beautiful, and some asked you to join a model agency!

Goku watched as you received flowers, coupons, and compliments left and right. He couldn't help but pout and tap his feet impatiently as he waited for you to finish talking to the people around you. But as soon as he heard you say, "I accept," his heart sank. He knew you had always wanted to be a model, but the thought of you being approached by other men with ulterior motives bothered him. Goku couldn't help but feel a sense of jealousy and possessiveness wash over him. He wanted to keep you all to himself and protect you from any potential threats. "Okay now that's enough.." Goku growled but you didn't hear it. You've finally walked back towards Goku, carrying the flowers and coupons in hand. But before you could say anything, Goku spoke up, his voice filled with irritation. "I can't believe you just accepted to become a model! Did you even think about me? I don't want those men to just ogle at your beautiful body all day!" Goku exclaimed. You tried to reassure him that it was just a one-time opportunity, but Goku just couldn't help but get even more jealous. "I don't care if it's just for one day!" Goku snapped back at you. "I don't want to risk it. I don't want those men looking at your body." Goku started grumbling, crossing his arms. You've sighed, trying to calm him down. "Goku, please understand. This is a one-time opportunity. It's not like I'm going to be a model permanently. And besides, I'd be paid well and we could use the extra money!" You've tried to reason with him, but to no avail. Goku just couldn't shake off his feelings of jealousy. Goku continued grumbling, clearly not happy with the situation. "But what if those men try to make a move on you? What if they try to take advantage of you? I don't want anyone else touching you but me." Goku couldn't help but voice out his insecurities and fears.

You've finally had enough of his possessiveness and jealous behavior. "Goku, enough!! I can take care of myself! Do you really have so little faith in me? Don't you trust me to handle myself in this situation?" You've confronted him, your patience running thin. Goku was taken aback by your reaction. He did trust you, but his jealousy was getting the better of him. "I do trust you, Y/n. But I can't help but feel protective of you. I don't want anyone else touching your body but me." Goku admitted, his possessiveness creeping in again. You've let out a frustrated sigh, feeling overwhelmed by his possessive behavior. "Goku, this is really getting too much. I'm a grown woman and I can handle myself. You need to stop being so possessive and jealous. It's not healthy for our relationship." You've tried to reason with him, hoping he would understand and control his emotions. Despite your attempts to reason with Goku, he refused to listen to reason. His possessive behavior and jealousy continued to take over, making it impossible for him to see things from your perspective. You felt more frustrated and hopeless with every attempt to make him understand, and it seemed like there was no way out of this cycle of jealousy and possessiveness. "Ugh!! I'm done!" You've said walking away making Goku worried "Hey! Where are you going?" Goku asked curiously. "I'll sleep at Bulma's this night. You've pissed me." You've said until you took a Taxi, leaving an irritated Saiyan all alone. He just decided to leave you be, thinking that you're the stubborn one here. He just kept mumbling on his way home that this night was near perfect until strangers ruined it.

The same night, he just couldn't sleep at all. The bed felt empty without your presence. Usually it doesn't mind him when it happens, when he goes training for a long time or just when you go to sleepovers with your friends, but this time? It was... Not the same. It felt cold empty and he hated it. He hated how bitter this night became. So without a second thought, he sensed your Ki, and teleported at Bulma's, in the room she gave you to sleep in. He looked at you, sleeping calmly, as if nothing happened. And as of you do not miss Goku's presence while he did missed yours. "Gosh... How can she acts as if nothing ha happened?.." Goku complained joining you into the bed and taking you in his arms and nuzzled in your neck. With you in his arms, he fell asleeo with ease and looked like a big fat ass baby. He also kept mumbling in his sleep things like" You're mine" "There's no way I'm meeting you go there." "No photoshoots we'll stay together today." He's the cutest. But won't hesitate to take advantage of his strength to lock you in his arms so you won't leave him.

Bitch sorry for randomly disappearing I just forgot this account existed tbh but anyways I'm back!! I have a lot of requests too but I'm super busy sorry y'all will have to wait.. Anyways I love u guys Take care!! <33

[fluideli123]

Okay so there's this Sonic Plurality meme going around

[IMAGE ID: Shadow and Sonic are standing side by side. Shadow says, "I have multiple personality disorder." and Sonic responds with, "Dayum!! Any of them freaky???" /END ID]

I'd seen it a few times across platforms but during one I stumbled upon an interesting response:

[IMAGE ID: I don't see anything to enjoy about this actually? Like I'm so confused. There have been no hints in the games and/or shows for Shadow to have DID (and losing memory is not the same at all, on the one hand it's trying to find out who you were, and on the other hand with DID it's literally different people living in the same body), so this is at best just something random that isn't funny, and at worst a poor attempt at a joke which both mocks people with such a serious condition and mischaracterizes Shadow. Then, the joke could reside in Sonic's answer, but considering the severity of DID, it would be pretty weird. And that's not even taking in account just how far from canon that answer is. I don't get it. I'm pretty sure there could have been many other explicit jokes to make that would have actually been funny, whereas this is just poorly thought-out. Plainly spoken, if Insta had a dislike button, you can pretty much guess what I'd use it for /END ID]

I will not be diving into the cesspool that could be created by creating a post in response to the claim that "this meme mocks DID people." So, instead I'm going to give my thoughts on the claim that thinking Shadow has characteristics of DID is mischaracterizing him might actually be an interpretation and not entirely a fact!

First of all, as stated by this person, Plurality is, in fact--in the most plainest and broadest of terms--multiple people living in one body! Shadow is partially alien since Dr. Robotnik used Black Doom's DNA to create Shadow The Hedgehog in a lab. Black Doom is part of an alien race in which one of their abilities is a collective hive mind!

A hive mind is, "a unified consciousness or intelligence formed by a number of alien individuals, the resulting consciousness typically exerting control over its constituent members." To simplify it means that a bunch of beings share one single consciousness, mind, and it can be shared between members in differing ways.

This is a characteristic of plurality! A lot of plural systems share a consciousness, thoughts, emotions, and ways of living. In some systems there are also "leaders" or types of headmates who are the main head of the collective. This would reflect Black Doom and his position of power within the hive mind and how it affects Shadow.

Outside of the similarities between the two there is also the biological aspect of plurality in play here. Shadow most likely has the genes for hive-mindedness, meaning he has the ability to share a mind with others, AKA a possibility for natural-born plurality. Which, differs from experience to experience!

Secondly, Shadow went through extreme trauma during his time on the ARK and on Earth. Disordered Plurality and Truamagenic Plurality share characteristics for their plurality being affected or formed by trauma within or outside the system. It is possible that he could have formed a type of plurality just from that experience alone, especially in combination of his natural alien genes. In a sense, he was never meant to be alone within his own mind.

Thirdly, he is a creature of chaos energy which is different and works in a hell of a lot of ways across media. So let's make a list real quick:

Chaos Emerald Energy

Manifest peoples' thoughts as power

Appliable to all living things

Can be channeled as a tangible energy

Feelings unleash energy and interact with the wielder differently

Can bend and affect reality (slowing time, warping, reshaping, travel through time and dimensions)

Temporarily enhance a user's innate talents

Channeled into Chaos Powers

Super transformations

2. Chaos energy (Archie)

Natural Liquid Chaos energy

Ability to track chaos energy

3. Chaos energy (Pre-Super Genesis Wave)

Derived from Chaos Force

Shadow and Knuckles are the only two known to harness Raw Chaos Energy

There is a possibility to harness even greater amounts of it

4. Chaos energy (Sonic X)

Emerald Chaos energy is needed to create rings

In summary, Shadow being a being made of literal chaos energy in such amounts can mean he has the possibility of each and every one of these known Chaos Energy Abilities.

Plurality can involve the formation and creation of headmates or introjects, a kind of headmate formed from something or somewhere else than within the system. Having the possible ability to interact with reality, harness raw chaos energy that others cannot, and create things based on feelings mixed with alien genes and trauma would be a pretty incredible mix for plurality. Not only that but, as you can see, it heavily ties to his own history and biology to be plural in some form or another.

Plus, is it really far off if Shadow had headmates? Many people theorize that he may not be the original after he met android versions of himself or a clone (I can never remember). Plus, his differences between Sonic Adventure, Shadow the Hedgehog, and other games (if we're to place them all within the same timeline) would explain why he acts, thinks, or shows different characteristics that some people believe "do not line up."

All in all, Plural Shadow truthers deserve to have fun and anyone who does or doesn't enjoy the meme that started this post is valid to have their own opinion. Just as it is to have different interpretations about Shadow and his form(s) of plurality!!!

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

So this is another "my vagina's/vulva's orgasm behaviour is confusing to me" question, but I did not find this explicitly in the faqs. So I have a vagina that js probably pretty standard. I get an orgasm pretty easily when I use a vibrator/massager or similar sex toy. I cannot, however, get myself off using my hands. Neither can my partner. We do fingering, oral or penetrative sex, all of which I enjoy a lot, even though I never (literally never) orgasm if no toy is involved. My partner and I are a bit curious as to why getting an orgasm with a toy is so easy for me, but so far, literally no other technique we tried that doesn't involve a vibrator has worked. I'm always having fun when we're having sex, I don't feel pressured about getting off, and my partner is very attentive and has tried many different things during sex. So my question is: Can you sort of "numb" your clitoris if you use toys too often? I've started masturbating pretty early, but I always used mechanical helpers, for example an electrical toothbrush. And I've been entertaining this weird theory that this has maybe led my nerves to only react to quite strong and strictly repetitive stimulation. But maybe this is ridiculous? Do you know anything about this? Coming due to my partner fingering me or going down on me or maybe even during penetrative sex would be something I'd like very much (and also being able to masturbate without toys would be a practical skill to have) so I'm wondering why this is not working so well. I love your blog btw and I've learned so much reading through your asks! Thank you for taking the time to answer so many questions!

hi anon,

you've actually pretty much nailed it! while you can't numb your clitoris, you can teach your body to respond only to particular types of stimuli - some people find themselves only able to get off in certain positions, for instance, or, as in your case, with a very specific intensity and repetition. vibrators are great for a lot of people who have difficulty with orgasm strictly because they deliver such powerful, consistent stimulation! and that's awesome, but it can also make it difficult for the comparatively weak and unpredictable human body to compare lmao.

I'm super glad that you and your partner are already in a place where you feel secure in the way sex works for you, rather than taking the need for a vibrator as a kind of shortcoming (... no pun intended). I think that puts you in a really good place to start experimenting and trying new things together and have fun doing it!

if you want to learn how to get off minus a vibe, there's really on foolproof solution: get that vibrator out of there. not for solo or partnered sex; from now on it's body parts only. that may mean no orgasm for a while, but it sounds like you already have a really good attitude about that, so I hope that won't be too much of a bummer during the adjustment period!

it may take a while, but what I'm hoping for it giving your body a nice long break deprived of stimulation that intense to help it grow more sensitive to touch from a hand, mouth, or other body parts. don't put too much pressure on yourself to be orgasmic right away; just try out different things, pursue new sensations, and try to be playful and pressure-free. even if it doesn't result in orgasm, I hope it can be a fulfilling and fun experience that lets you learn new things about how you like to be touched and experience sensation.

also, pro tip: if you go long enough without using a vibe there's a very good chance you will, in scientific terms, nut yourself senseless pretty immediately when you reintroduce it, so that's something to look forward to.

[aspd-culture]

Welcome back. You’re very informative.

I’m very confused about how numerous people, from you, to other antisocial people speaking from their experiences (some of which I learned are actually friends) to prosocial researchers of ASPD say that antisocial people see relationships as transactional. It’s not weird that you guys see it that way, it’s more like “and prosocials… don’t???” Because I’m certain I’m prosocial. I’m neurodivergent, sure, but no signs of ASPD. So, how do most prosocial people typically view relationships if they’re not transactional?

So I find prosocials and pwASPD both tend to think “but doesn’t everybody” when we hear this - it’s a super undescriptive term - but we’re thinking different things define something as transactional. We also see the reason for that transaction to be different.

From a prosocial generally, they’ll mean “I only want to be around people that ‘don’t drain my energy’, that don’t just take take take, that we mutually enjoy the friendship/relationship and want to be around each other”. That’s kinda their definition of getting something out of it, and they want everyone to get something out of it. If they’re draining you, they want you to be free of it so you can be happy, and the transactions involved can be purely emotional/vibes. The reason they feel this way is a desire for positive and enjoyable social connection; the consequence for an uneven/bad/missing transaction is discomfort and wasting their time in negative experiences and generally feeling bad in association with that person.

PwASPD see those transactions very very literally. There’s no vibes nor emotions in the transactions, those are either a reaction to the transaction or a bonus. We mean that we are getting something tangible or practical out of it. Rides, help with things we can’t or don’t want to do alone, sex, maybe even the social relief from the annoyance of “why don’t you ever talk to anyone?” coming from all sides. We also don’t always care if it’s even on the other person’s end. If they’re ok driving me everywhere/if they do it and don’t say or show they’re uncomfortable, then I will assume they are fine with that piece of the transaction. If I’m taking more than I’m giving and they seem chill with that then I’ll accept it. However, I won’t give them *nothing* and that’s because of our reason for transactions - it’s dangerous otherwise. First off, I have shit I need I can’t get myself as much as it sucks, so I need to be around people. But if we need something from them, what we learned in our childhoods is that we don’t get that for free. There’s always something over your head. A lot of pwASPD had friends or caregivers that would hold favors or even *basic, legally-mandated caregiving* over our heads as though we didn’t deserve it. Often our value was determined as a child by what we provided, and since children can’t provide much, we were worthless and not deserving of good treatment.

This is part of the reason (TW non-descriptive CSA mention, skip to the next paragraph if you want) that people thought ASPD was directly correlated with CSA for a long time - many cases of long term CSA come from either “I’ll give you x/do x for you if you help me with this” or worse, doing something first then saying “but I gave you X!/did X for you! I wouldn’t have if I knew you’d act like this”, often call us selfish if we tried to say no and maybe get aggressive or forceful after, and that is an easy lead-in to our view of interactions.

So a lot of us see it that if we want to be safe/know we can continue to get what we need, we HAVE to be giving them something. If you claim you like being around me “just to be around me” or worse that you’re willing to do something for me “just because I want to”, that’s not safe. You want something from me and I’ll give it to you - just tell me what it is. If you’re not telling me, that means it’s not good or you’re just gonna decide later that I’m selfish. You might hurt me to get what you want and justify it with this. Take something from my side so we’re even, because even means safe. Even means I get access to what I need and you get access to what you need - so now we’re both using this relationship/friendship/etc for something and you wouldn’t wanna mess that up by putting me in danger any more than I’d want to mess it up by putting you in danger.

Of course, not every prosocial sees it the first way and not every pwASPD had those experiences and/or sees it that way. But that’s what I’ve found to be common. If you see “they make me happy” as what your or their end of the transaction is, it’s definitely a prosocial response, maybe with the exception of thinking of it as “getting their brain to dopamine/oxytocin” vs caring how they’re actually feeling. If not, if you need it to be practical, that’s definitely transactional.

It’s important to note this is personal relationships with no practical consequences to ending the relationship - most people see relationships (platonic) with coworkers or managers as transactional and that’s a way I usually explain it to prosocials (“do you deal with your boss bc you like them or bc they sign your check - and would your boss keep you hired if you didn’t do your job because you make them happy just by being there?”). But with a romantic or sexual partner, a friend, etc. this is not a typical view of relationships.

That said - you can *absolutely* not have ASPD and have transactional view of relationships. It’s not a 1:1 thing there; not everyone with ASPD has it and not every prosocial doesn’t. It’s just a really common piece of the puzzle that is this personality disorder.

Edit: ack I’m so sorry I forgot to add the csa tw tags they’re there now.

Plain text below the cut:

So I find prosocials and pwASPD both tend to think “but doesn’t everybody” when we hear this - it’s a super undescriptive term - but we’re thinking different things define something as transactional. We also see the reason for that transaction to be different.

From a prosocial generally, they’ll mean “I only want to be around people that ‘don’t drain my energy’, that don’t just take take take, that we mutually enjoy the friendship/relationship and want to be around each other”. That’s kinda their definition of getting something out of it, and they want everyone to get something out of it. If they’re draining you, they want you to be free of it so you can be happy, and the transactions involved can be purely emotional/vibes. The reason they feel this way is a desire for positive and enjoyable social connection; the consequence for an uneven/bad/missing transaction is discomfort and wasting their time in negative experiences and generally feeling bad in association with that person.

PwASPD see those transactions very very literally. There’s no vibes nor emotions in the transactions, those are either a reaction to the transaction or a bonus. We mean that we are getting something tangible or practical out of it. Rides, help with things we can’t or don’t want to do alone, sex, maybe even the social relief from the annoyance of “why don’t you ever talk to anyone?” coming from all sides. We also don’t always care if it’s even on the other person’s end. If they’re ok driving me everywhere/if they do it and don’t say or show they’re uncomfortable, then I will assume they are fine with that piece of the transaction. If I’m taking more than I’m giving and they seem chill with that then I’ll accept it. However, I won’t give them *nothing* and that’s because of our reason for transactions - it’s dangerous otherwise. First off, I have shit I need I can’t get myself as much as it sucks, so I need to be around people. But if we need something from them, what we learned in our childhoods is that we don’t get that for free. There’s always something over your head. A lot of pwASPD had friends or caregivers that would hold favors or even *basic, legally-mandated caregiving* over our heads as though we didn’t deserve it. Often our value was determined as a child by what we provided, and since children can’t provide much, we were worthless and not deserving of good treatment.

This is part of the reason (TW non-descriptive CSA mention, skip to the next paragraph if you want) that people thought ASPD was directly correlated with CSA for a long time - many cases of long term CSA come from either “I’ll give you x/do x for you if you help me with this” or worse, doing something first then saying “but I gave you X!/did X for you! I wouldn’t have if I knew you’d act like this”, often call us selfish if we tried to say no and maybe get aggressive or forceful after, and that is an easy lead-in to our view of interactions.

So a lot of us see it that if we want to be safe/know we can continue to get what we need, we HAVE to be giving them something. If you claim you like being around me “just to be around me” or worse that you’re willing to do something for me “just because I want to”, that’s not safe. You want something from me and I’ll give it to you - just tell me what it is. If you’re not telling me, that means it’s not good or you’re just gonna decide later that I’m selfish. You might hurt me to get what you want and justify it with this. Take something from my side so we’re even, because even means safe. Even means I get access to what I need and you get access to what you need - so now we’re both using this relationship/friendship/etc for something and you wouldn’t wanna mess that up by putting me in danger any more than I’d want to mess it up by putting you in danger.

Of course, not every prosocial sees it the first way and not every pwASPD had those experiences and/or sees it that way. But that’s what I’ve found to be common. If you see “they make me happy” as what your or their end of the transaction is, it’s definitely a prosocial response, maybe with the exception of thinking of it as “getting their brain to dopamine/oxytocin” vs caring how they’re actually feeling. If not, if you need it to be practical, that’s definitely transactional.

It’s important to note this is personal relationships with no practical consequences to ending the relationship - most people see relationships (platonic) with coworkers or managers as transactional and that’s a way I usually explain it to prosocials (“do you deal with your boss bc you like them or bc they sign your check - and would your boss keep you hired if you didn’t do your job because you make them happy just by being there?”). But with a romantic or sexual partner, a friend, etc. this is not a typical view of relationships.

That said - you can *absolutely* not have ASPD and have transactional view of relationships. It’s not a 1:1 thing there; not everyone with ASPD has it and not every prosocial doesn’t. It’s just a really common piece of the puzzle that is this personality disorder.

Edit: ack I’m so sorry I forgot to add the csa tw tags they’re there now.

[blade-that-was-broken]

“Hey Clay?” 

“Yeah?” 

“I know you don’t really like to talk about your older bro-...” 

“Did he call again? Ignore it, he’ll stop. Honestly, he should know better by now,” Clay grumbled, not looking up from his project. Last week, Bruce had called him, out of the blue. It had been a weird phone call, acting as if the last several years didn’t happen. As if Bruce didn’t just pick up and move across the country the moment he could, leaving the rest of them to their mother.

He knew he was holding a ridiculous grudge. It had been years. And Clay might have gotten over it eventually, if Bruce hadn’t replaced them with his perfect family. He barely stayed in contact - even with the brothers who weren’t as mad at him. Branch had been young when Bruce left, barely six years old. Clay wasn’t a whole ton better but at least Branch knew him to an extent. Branch at least knew his favorite color. Clay doubted Branch knew the first thing about Bruce. 

“He… he’s here.” 

Bruce wouldn’t leave his resort and his wife and well, now his kids. It was like he expected everyone to pick up and go visit him just because he lived on an exotic island or whatever. As if Clay didn’t have responsibilities or Floyd wasn’t constantly traveling. As if it was so easy for Grandma to leave the house and fly across the country. Bruce barely called and he never, ever visited - much less out of the blue like this. 

Clay stopped and looked up, his head swiveling around to look back at his best friend. Her curly blonde hair was wrapped up in a messy ponytail, which was fairly normal, but the uncertain and awkward expression on her face was definitely not the norm for her. “What?” he asked, shocked. 

She nodded. “Yeah. There is a guy down in the courtyard. He said he’s your older brother.” 

Clay shook his head. Bruce would never leave his precious wife and resort to visit him, especially when he knew how much Clay was upset with him. Had been for years. Honestly, aside from one phone call a week or two ago, Clay hadn’t really heard from him in years. Clay could have chalked it up to Bruce just knowing that he was angry with him for abandoning him - them - with their mother the first moment he could, but he barely kept in contact with Floyd and Branch as well. And they didn’t hold the hard feelings that Clay did. Not that Clay was much better; he didn’t talk to any of his brothers much either. 

“There is no way,” he protested with a huff, rolling his eyes. She must be mistaken, there was no other option. “He’s never made a trip out here. He would never leave his resort. What is he doing out here?” Viva hesitated, glancing away, which was very strange for her. She was very straightforward and easily excitable. Clay felt his brow furrow a little. “Viva…” 

“He’s not… like how you said.” 

He just sighed and took a deep breath. Bruce definitely had a way with people; he always had. Granted, Clay probably painted him in mostly a crappy light, due to the fact that whenever the subject did come up - which was extremely rare - it was not often positive. Clay had a lot of anger and probably a lot of resentment. It was a work in progress. “Look, Viv. I know he’s easy to believe. He seems soooooo friendly and charming that you want to just swoon or whatever. He’s got that effect on people but…” 

“No.” 

“No?” Clay asked, confused. She said it so strong, so flat, so sure and Clay wasn’t sure what to make of that. 

“Clay… he’s not like that at all. He was actually really quiet and awkward and super uncertain but held him with some kind of…rigidness? At least as much as he could,” Viva looked uncomfortable, like she had seen something she really didn’t like. He wasn’t sure what that was about. At the moment, he was more hung up on the description which did not sound like Bruce at all. 

He scoffed. “Bruce?” 

“He didn’t say that was his name,” Viva continued, still uncertain, glancing towards the window. “But you only have one older brother right?” 

Clay blinked and his whole world came to a standstill. “I….” 

“Clay?”

Older brothers. 

There was no way, though. He hadn’t heard anything from him since their parent’s divorce and when he was practically dragged away almost kicking and screaming. Clay barely remembered it; he tried not to. Everyone had been crying but Branch’s screaming, going along with everyone else's tears kind of drowned everything out. It hadn’t been a pretty memory and Clay avoided thinking about it. Coupling that with his mother’s systematic way of erasing anything that evoked him or their father from their house and their lives, it only took a few years for everyone to stop considering them entirely. 

His eyes widened. There was no way. There was no way it was possible. 

Clay didn’t even think. He bolted out the door, not even bothering to strip off his lab coat. There was no way. It had been at least fifteen years. What were the chances? After fifteen years? There was no way. 

He had to be sure. 

Making his way down to the courtyard, with Viva shouting after him, he scanned the area upon slamming the doors open. It had been a decade and a half. He had no idea what to look for anymore. They had all changed. 

“He’s by the fountain, sitting on the stone wall,” Viva supplied. 

That helped. He made his way over, still looking over the area until he spotted a more middle aged guy with short hair and bandages on his arm. When he looked, Viva nudged him, giving him the sign that who she had talked to was him. Definitely not Bruce. 

He looked over at Clay and recognized him, suddenly nervous. Clay just stared. That was all he could really muster up to do. “Uh… hi, Clay. I know you might not really remember me but…” 

Clay didn’t say a word at first, just launching himself at his big brother, knocking him into the grass behind in a hug. He clearly wasn’t expecting it but he took to the action pretty quickly, wrapping his arms around Clay’s back for support and to keep him from being tossed around. 

“John Dory.” 

Clay couldn’t remember the last time he thought of him, much less said his name out loud. He hated that. His eyes were squeezed shut, just soaking up the firm grasp his oldest - his oldest - brother had on him. He had so much to say and so many questions but only one happened to come out. It had been fifteen years and now John Dory just showed up out of the blue. 

“How did…how did you find me?”

It wasn’t exactly what he wanted to say. There was a lot he wanted to say and do but his mouth had run off with him, questioning so much that he really didn’t actually care the answers to. Because he was here. After fifteen years. 

“Bruce told me.” 

Clay shifted slightly. “B-Bruce?” He supposed it might have been easier to find a resort owner before some crazy older college student. Although Clay felt like he had his name out there more than his other older brother, as he had written papers and had been featured in several journals. Although it might not have been in things John might have looked through. They could be pretty niche. 

“I…” John tensed a little and hesitated. “He found me. The hospital found him, I guess? They found him and called him. I’ve been staying with him for my recovery.” 

Clay’s heart dropped as he pulled away, trying to assess. He scrambled off his brother, stepping back. “Your what?” 

John grimaced. 

Viva nudged his shoulder and spoke quietly. “Clay.” 

Clay’s eyes were drawn downward. Sure, there were bandages on his arm but John’s grip didn’t seem to be very weak so he doubted that would be so debilitating and honestly, his legs seemed fi-… where was his leg? 

“W-Where is your leg?” 

“Sudan… I think?” 

Clay just stared. 

“Right, sorry. Kinda dark humor there,” John muttered, sitting up a little more. “I was… I have been, I guess, in the military for a while. Over ten years I guess, uhm… it’s a long story. But some stuff happened, my arm got kinda burned up but it’ll be okay. Head got banged around a bit but that should be fine too. The biggest thing was my leg which… well, that ended my military career pretttyyyy quick. The hospital found Bruce and yeah, I’ve been staying with him but…. I wanted to see you. Needed to see you.” 

There was a pause. 

“Sorry, that was… that was a lot of words.” 

“When Bruce called…” Clay drifted off in realization. Bruce had called to tell Clay about John. 

“He didn’t want to freak you out.” 

“But I hung up.” 

John nodded. “Bruce didn’t really tell me anything about what happened with you guys or anything but I just… I bought a plane ticket and well, here I am.” 

Here he was. 

“Does Bruce even know you’re here?” Clay asked, uncertainly. With John’s state, it probably meant that Bruce was kind of taking care of him, which meant he was in charge of his welfare and health. John was still on leg crutches and probably couldn’t get around super well. It couldn’t have been that long since it happened. 

John snorted. “I am a grown man.” 

“Missing a leg!” 

“So?” John asked, his nose wrinkling. Clay almost felt like he had been slapped. Floyd and Branch did the same thing. “I knew a guy who lost both and guess what? He lives alone. Does just fine.” 

“He’s probably freaking out.”

“Bruce? Probably.”

“Then why are you here?” 

John tried not to look hurt. He would have done a great job too, if he hadn’t looked away. It was a telltale sign and Clay noticed. He didn’t even realize what he had said and how it came out until it was too late. He cursed himself; he didn’t want John to think he didn’t want him here. “I haven’t seen you in fifteen years, Clay. No matter how much time passes or what happens, I love you.” 

Shit. 

“Clay… he’s so cute,” Viva sniffled. “You never told me-” 

“That I existed?” John guessed, making Clay cringe. “That seems to be an ongoing theme.” 

“JD, I just…” he didn’t really know what to say. He didn’t have any excuse, really. He could blame a lot on his mother but that felt wrong to say to him. There wasn’t any real excuse that would make anyone feel better. 

“It’s alright,” John replied, although Clay could tell there was some struggle. Which made sense. No one wanted to feel forgotten by loved ones. Especially not the ones still alive. “Bruce didn’t tell his kids I existed either. I’m getting over it.” 

He shouldn’t have to get over it, Clay thought. He shouldn’t have had to do any of it. He should have spent the last fifteen years with them. He should have been there for birthdays, for their graduations, for their important moments. He should have been there when Bruce got married. For Floyd’s first show. For Clay’s best college awards. Bruce’s kids should have known their uncle their entire life, not just now and so forth. 

“She’s dead, our mother,” Clay said, blandly. He blamed her a lot, for pretty much everything. Not the divorce itself; that was both of them, but for cutting them off from his brother. For forcing his name to never be spoken. For erasing his memory. It was one thing to keep them away from their father, although Clay didn’t like that either, but to keep them away from their older brother was unforgivable for him. 

“So is dad. Over ten years.”

Ten years. Over even. John lost his family, became an adult and lost his father. No wonder he joined the military. 

“Six.” 

“I tried looking for you,” John promised, like it was something he had to convince Clay of. Like he didn’t want Clay to think that he didn’t try. It wasn’t meant to make Clay feel worse and Clay knew it but it did anyway. Because Clay hadn’t. He hadn’t looked. He hadn’t even considered it. “Before joining the military. After too, a little, I suppose. I’m no detective I guess.” 

Clay just stared at him. Did he think…?

“I know…” John frowned again. “I know you’re mad at Bruce but I can’t… I… Clay, I want to be…to have… to be in some part of your life and I just…” 

“I’m not mad at you.” 

Clay hated the almost hopeful look that John stared at him with. It was a expression that screamed he wasn’t expecting this reaction. “You… aren’t?”  

“No. Of course not. Our parents were petty and bitter and it is all their fault. JD, you never… you didn’t abandon anyone. Dad took you away and mom decided to try and erase that part of her life. Have you blamed yourself this whole time? For years?” 

“No, no, I just… I don’t want you to think I stayed away or something.” 

“I believe you,” Clay promised. “And I’m so glad you’re here.”

[peachjagiya]

Dear Peach, did you see the Restaurant manager’s clarification on his post of noir_kia’s fan art?

“whw_hk__1.31 13h :

Silently, there are some weird posts, so l'll be precise. I love all of BTS and they're saying ridiculous things about guys dating, so please stop saying weird things on my social media. We love everyone and they are really kind and precious people. They are having a hard time in the military right now and we pray for their health and always cheer them on from afar and only those who wish them well should leave comments. If you're going to say weird things, do it somewhere else.”

I was not expecting him to say: YES, these 2 are a couple, but his stance is pretty strong. Can’t it be that we just overthink Taekook for more than just great close friends (just for now?)

I recently read an interview about a similar situation with Louis Tomlinson & Harry Styles and seems so familiar with what we do with Tae and JK…

https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/louis-tomlinson-harry-styles-larry-conspiracy-1235001225/

Louis even sort of said all these rumors damaged his relationship with Harry. What do you think?

I'll be honest... I can't quite read the tone of his reply. I'm unsure which comments he's taking offence to.

At first, I thought he was saying guys dating was ridiculous and weird and was ready to be annoyed but I actually think it looks like some people overstepped the mark and that could be what he's calling ridiculous and weird.

He does also say "only those who wish them well" should leave comments so maybe what he's actually complaining about is people being aggressive in the comments.

It was, after all, him liking comments about them being married. Maybe he was just liking them because they were positive comments without really reading them. But I do think if he's taking umbrage at Taekook comments specifically - he doesn't specify - he maybe... should read what he's liking?! It could be unwittingly but he has contributed here. Like he posted that, nobody else did?

Maybe he just thought they looked like bestie best friends and didn't bother to click and see what else Kia posts.

I had a little bit of an initial "UHM WHAT?" response yesterday but then I chilled and thought "hang on, why would have insider information about them in any way?"

He is literally just a guy in a restaurant, it's hardly like they're coming in going "So we'll take six tables, free ice cream for armys and by the way, we're GAYYYYY. TOGETHER."

As for the Larry stuff, I was thinking about this earlier. I don't think a lot of people realise how little would change for me if it was revealed they weren't a couple. 75% of the time I'm arguing that it's not impossible that they are; that Tae is important to JK; that Jennie looked a lot like media play; that they're super close because Jimkookers seem incapable of accepting that. I'd still be here defending Tae against accusations of being an annoyance to JK who just shows up places where he is for clout. I'd still be arguing over Jungkook's unfair characterisation. I'd still think ITS was a truth-bending moment.

I'd still be arguing with y'alls over the same stuff.

I'd still find their faces at Dreamiere beautiful, I'd still find Hawaii wonderful. None of this changes in that eventuality and I always keep the possibility at the back of my mind.

So while yes, I do happen to believe it and would have a few confusions about why certain things happened, my life won't change much! So I don't feel particularly like I am overthinking. I'm not overstepping by going into lives or weverse or instagram posts to scream about Taekook to people who don't wanna hear it. I'm not even on twitter where I know they read! It's a clearly labelled Taekook blog and if you're here and reading this, it was because you chose to.

But I think it's REALLY important that you make your own mind up about how comfortable you feel in this space if this Larry article has bothered you. I can't be your compass on this.

💜

[daisy-daze17]

Omori Manga Thoughts cause it was uhhh

OK so like. The thing is I only got into the omori fandom in February of this year so take my opinion with a grain of salt.

1. I'm mostly a fan of the art style-- a lot of people said that Sunny always seems to have a panicked expression so it's hard to read into him, plus the characters look a lot younger than they're supposed to (Which I find odd). But other than that, I think it does a really good job representing the scarier parts with very abstract drawings of Mari/Something. They coloured it well and thank god did Kel's skintone right. There is one particular panel that I especially love:

So much detail and it captures the feeling of seeing faraway for the first time really well ^^

Some nitpicky positive thoughts:

Sunny could have looked more distinct from Omori because the only difference I see are their outfits. Maybe make Sunny's features softer and have less contrasting values so we can see an immediate difference.

I like how they did everyone's eyes-- Sunny/Omori's are just dull and black, and everyone else with dark eyes are shown to have a light in them. (Just a nice detail i appreciated)

I like how Omori is clearly less expressive compared to sunny, but I think Sunny could have benefitted from having more emotions than surprised/blushing.

2. The pacing was weird. like really fucking weird. The basic structure of the game Omori is: Omori is in whitespace -> Omori plus the gang (Hero, Aubrey and Kel) meet up with Basil and Mari in headspace -> everyone minus Mari goes to Basil's house and learn all the combat stuff along the way -> after fixing the photo album it suddenly shifts to basil in a panicked state before glitching you back into white space again. The moment when basil shifts the mood from calm to terrifying is REALLY important.

It forces the new tone on you very suddenly and also sets up a lot of mystery surrounding Mari when Basil can't finish what he was going to say about her. By now we know that something is very wrong and it has to do with Mari, but we don't know what.

The manga is kind of all over the place the whole time. First we see the christmas scene when Sunny gets his violin. But then Mari does her whole nightmare thing and we know somethings up from the first few pages. Next we wake up at night as Sunny in the real world... yet it shows the little "THREE DAYS LEFT" as well? At this point I was super confused because basically the entire nighttime sequence is shown through a sort of montage with Sunny's mom's voice message in the background before transitioning into the day when Kel first knocks on the door. A cool thing they did was parallel Kel's knocking with the creepy knocking we get from Mari Something. HOWEVER for reasons unknown they just completely cut out the fight against something on the stairs??

Something I was really excited about was seeing how they would integrate the combat into the manga. And they do it later with the Aubrey fight (more on that later), but not now? So now I'm wondering if they'll include Sunny's three fears that he has to overcome.

So next we find our boy (KEL!!!!!) and he is asking Sunny if he wants to come to Hobbies. I did find the dialogue here pretty awkward as Kel bounced back and forth in demeanor, but that's to be expected since Sunny isn't talking. (And I appreciate how he shows some kind of reaction to seeing one of his best friends after 4 years lol)

I mean compared to this when he just jumps straight into his hobbez idea without much reaction to actually seeing Sunny lol.

The most notable thing after this is the Aubrey confrontation with Basil and the other hooligans. I DONT KNOW WHY but they chose to not show the hooligans in that scene!! The hooligans are aubrey's little gang/posse who she hangs around with all the time and the people we always see when she's bullying Basil.

It's very important to note that Basil is talking to KIM here. He starts the conversation begging for her to tell Aubrey to give the photo album back. Aubrey is actively ignoring his attempts to get it back, with basil claiming "She won't listen to me."

In the manga she appears out of seemingly no where and proceeds to beat Basil directly with her bat. Prior to this we get no setup or explanation as to why Aubrey's attacking him or what the situation is. WORST OF ALL, It's only Aubrey alone attacking him and NOT her gang of the Hooligans. The hooligans are important in showing us just how isolated and ostracized from society Basil really is after Aubrey began bullying him. He literally has a whole gang of kids who call him a creep and attack him regularly. Here it seems like Aubrey is insane and is just beating him selfless for kicks. (not that I'm justifying Aubrey's behavior in the game, but the lack of context makes this situation even worse.)

I think It's also important to bring up how they switched around the order of events because in this situation, it's not working. We're supposed to first be introduced to younger Aubrey and Basil in headspace-- their younger counterparts. Aubrey is strong-willed and excitable and Basil is calm and kind. And most importantly-- they're VERY GOOD FRIENDS. So seeing Aubrey revealed to have been bullying him these past 4 years shocks the player and makes them understand how much things have really changed. Doing it the other way around will automatically villainize DW Aubrey since we already know what goes on in real life.

And then something interesting happens-- Sunny blacks out during the fight and returns to Headspace. This is SUPER weird as we've only ever seen Sunny go into headspace while sleeping, because it's an escape mechanism he uses to avoid The Truth. Does this mean he isn't aware he goes into headspace unwillingly sometimes? And what does this mean for the continuation of the real world story? Are we going to go through the entire Space Boy quest just to get back to that scene?

Anyway, I'm interested to see how they take it from here. Maybe they'll do a continuous switchover to the real world where they jump between it more frequently. But I question what that would mean for the timeline because the events of headspace happen in between the three days while Sunny is sleeping-- so he can't be in two places at the same time. Maybe they'll write more and more random ways for Sunny to black out to do this?? They defiantly are trying to take a step back from following the game exactly. I can't say I don't like it because I don't know how it'll turn out, so I'm excited for chapter 2!

[lukolabrainrot]

I just want to express what I am feeling right now with all that has happened because everything is just weird and sus. I am just confused and kinda frustrated (with how some fans are acting right now)

First, the Jake and Nicola relationship. Everyone is already assuming that they’re together just because of few pics and because he was in Malta. However, what actually boggles my mind is how private Nicola is with her personal life… but her letting the narrative of what’s between her and Jake out of control is so not her (I am just basing it on her previous SM behaviours. Of course, I don’t know her). When I first became a fan of her years ago, I really know nothing about her love life (she never talked about it). What I am saying is that she’s really really private. Some pointed out that maybe she changed and wants to share a little bit of her life… but I tend to disagree because especially now, she’s even more famous and some fans can be super invasive (we can see that now with all the stalking), I tend to believe she would want to be even more private. (I don’t know if I am making sense. lol).

Second, L and A… I really believed that something happened after their Italy trip and something shifted within the dynamic of their friend group. Now, I don’t know if I believe that L and A are done (I am really hoping though), but there are some things that are pointing out that they are. Recently, A removed some Luke related pics on her ig grid, which is weird knowing how much she wanted to rub to everyone’s faces that she’s with luke. lol. Another thing… with everything happening between Nicola and Jake, I would think (I am totally judging A by saying this and I feel bad but I can’t help it) that A would use this opportunity to let us know that they’re still together coz at this point, all of the attention are all on Jake and Nic.

For the people who are saying that maybe Luke and A really want to keep their relationship private now… I also tend to disagree because they should’ve done this during the WT (imagine if A kept a low profile then, and not antagonized the entire fandom, she would not received so much hate now.)

I don’t know if I am making sense with what I just typed. lol. Ultimately, imo, everything is sus right now (or maybe we are all just overthinking. lol). But I am really hoping that something positive is happening bts between Nicola and Luke. Can’t wait to watch them again in season 4 ♥️

Ps. I love your blog and theories! Keep it up

lol it made sense to me!

And ty for the kind words and for being here!!

[guardian5tiger3]

A reading about the person you're thinking of .

Groups-

1 2

3 4

5 6

Group one

This person's soul has called them to move in some sort of way in order to be able to build themselves up to be able to give to others and be ok within themselves. This is a very honest and I heard charismatic person. They were in some state of lack in some way and I feel now theyre going to come out and people will see that they're better off now, this very well could be financially.they might have many suitors. They might like to trip(on psychedelics) or have been wanting to. There's some negative and irritating energy surrounding them. 2 is significant. You might not know if you want to talk to or hear from this person , or something in yourself is confused . You guys may have stopped talking. You are more positive energetical than a lot of the people they deal with. It seems like your connection would be positive if you talked again. And any bickering would just sort of be petty and unnecessary but I don't even see that happening really. Only to work things out.

Group two

I'm seeing there's a possibility of you two seeing eachother in some type of more social setting. They might be pissed off at or hurt by you. They might not be open to you but it's like they actually really care. You guys , your best bet might be to try to show this person you care if you want a reconnection. Even then this individual is being weird. I wouldn't hope for too much regarding this person but for some of you if you see them or have the chance to talk to them and you want to try, it very well could be worth a shot. I don't think this person accepts that you care. And if you show it they doubt you.this is their own issues. If you feel that you love them, then I think they love you too. So you might have to pour your heart out. Maybe you need to do a lot to earn their trust or something. Even then this person might still choose to not entertain it. Cold. I can't see too far into the future for you or this person, though.

Group three

I'm literally envisioning something spinning or turning. It kind of feels like , dizzy. Someone might be very sick or have had a panic attack. I'm getting that this person is sweet and it seems like they can be involved with other people in a good way but they're still standing alone somehow because they seem like they don't need anybody. But right now they may be troubled and they need people to be there for them and nobody would assume that of this person because they are somewhat respected and or ignored because you wouldn't expect this from them. They almost seem like even if issues they're going through were to arise they wouldn't be so affected. I feel a lot in my heart so this person is loving they could possibly be motherly. People think they're doing good and continuously doing better and honestly they might be but something is wrong for them. This is your calling to show them support and love and offer them help. I saw a hand being offered someone else taking the offer and grabbing their hand.(softly) a sweet vision really. Whoever you came here for though needs support. For some of you this is really dire and I got a feeling in my stomach telling me what I just wrote is very true..

Group four

This person is trying to build up to something but might be having blockages. This person might have some hidden heartbreak or conflict going on but they cope well. They try to come off as super content but I feel like someone or something has been stealing this person's sunshine, or they did this to someone else . If so I don't think they knew what they were doing , but it's as if they felt the need to be weird about it so how do you not know..I'm getting something about a rabbit . This person might party. They might like to put on makeup heavy. They're coming off sort of egotistical or full of themselves. Some form of karma has been and is sneaking up on them and they've been trying to fight it off and or hide from it.

Group five

*roles could be reversed in this.

Is this a goddamn crush? Some of you this is a crush. OTHERS of you, this person keeps you up at night regardless. You guys there must be something you heard about them or even some type of rejection that took place. It could even just be something you're telling yourself in regards to this person. People the advice I'm being given to give to you all is to please make sure you're emotionally balanced. Not that you don't feel deeply. To feel deep is a super power. But make sure it's balanced. They might actually be pretty intrigued by you guys but you don't want it to be a scenario where you scare them away. With you guys your energy is deep like fucking Narnia in a person so the energy within you can be many energies , whatever youre feeling. So balance your priorities and I'm really feeling you need to metaphorically let the water settle and become still within yourself. You all are beautiful truly. It's just that this person doesn't seem to know you like that deep as you can be , and we're talking about first impressions of that level inside of you here. This person could also end up consumed by you. Holyy shit. You know if this person ends up not being able to handle you, which isn't even the case for most of you. But if it is, then there is someone out there who will love it and thrive being with you. I feel a lot of infatuation this person or someone has about you and it seems like it's just about your energy and a sense of mysteriousness. Regarding this person though, they seem like they're somewhat trying to analyze a situation most likely with you as to how and if they should approach in what way.

Guys this is not a negative message as I can relate to you guys a lot. 👍🏽Infact what you have to be that deep of a person is a gift.

Group six

You guys I got super warm immediately and had to go turn on the a/c.i think the ice cream is trying to represent the same energy. This person might have had to chill out or cool off I guess and while doing that I see they have grown to a good but certain extent and they don't seem to want to move any further. Seems like they're stuck in a comfort zone. I heard pied Piper so I had to look that one up and it says someone who offers and then doesn't go through with it basically. and yeah this person might be greedy or weird like that in some way . They could be like a scam artist type. For a lot of you this is too harsh but somebody needed to know. I wanted to say capisce so I don't know maybe they say that or something. I don't talk like that lol. Spirit just wants to let you guys know that they're stagnant I guess. Especially for someone they ripped someone innocent off . Also‼️this could be someone who did this to the person you're asking about but that's definitely not for everyone, I feel like you'll probably know. I feel like there's a lot more to this but I'm not getting anything else. Hmm.

[pillarsalt]

My personal approach for situations like yours with your friend is to act very confused and unaware. Like acting shocked at his name, and then continuing to act super confused and horrified but in a way that makes you seem just out of the loop. That being said, that's kind of non confrontational, and I really respect you for having the difficult conversation.

Oh yes I've used the feigned ignorance technique before, especially with nonbinary women friends (and now I've just realized that over the years I've had more female friends who started to pretend they're not women than ones who haven't, that's fucking depressing lol.) Sometimes with the more empathetic individuals, they will genuinely consider what you're asking and you can actually see the wheels turning (I remember this happening with a college friend NB woman, someone else made a comparison between men identifying as women and rachel dolezal, she said "that seems wrong to me but... I can't really say why.") Unfortunately, trans activism has instilled an easy way to shed any doubt that creeps into the minds of its devotees: you can't think that because it's internalized transphobia, it's TERF rhetoric, that thought is bad and you need to give yourself 100 lashes and listen to transwomen instead. So it's very difficult to get someone who fully buys into this ideology to honestly and critically reflect on it. It's not impossible, but it's very difficult.

We'll see, I'm definitely going to question the name first and foremost, establish that I think it's weird as fuck if he deliberately wants everyone who learns his name to immediately associate him with blowjobs. That honestly gives me the most apprehension because I've never seen or heard him say anything porn-brained, and it makes me wonder how well I really know the kind of person he is, or how much the usual internet cesspools have melted his brain. But I want to give him the benefit of the doubt at least until I can ask him wtf he's thinking.

The book I'm halfway through has put the brakes on my guns a-blazin plan to say my piece all at once though. It's tough because I have the feeling I might only have one chance to relay my position, but just simply delivering a message is not an effective way to have someone hear and seriously consider your point of view. It may have to be more long-term and subtle, not pretending to be ignorant but asking questions that he'll have to really self-reflect on to answer honestly.

I'm hoping that I've proven myself to be someone who cares about her friends and wants the best for everyone, and that he'll see I'm not trying to attack him. If in the end we can say "we have a fundamental ideological disagreement but won't let it come between our camaraderie", that would be actually ideal to me. His nonbinary longterm girlfriend is a STAUNCH genderist though, so the diplomatic effort may all be for naught. I know you are all probably wondering why I'm so invested in this man; besides the fact he's my friend, he is the same age as and reminds me so much of my little brother, and I have this protective instinct about him. About all my friends really. Man it will really suck to lose them. This probably sounds dramatic but I've been thinking about doing my own private goodbye tour with each of them individually, like one last nice peaceful hangout sesh each before everything blows up.

Anyway I need to stop pacing in circles about this for now. Thanks for the nice ask anon <3

[ilovebeingt4t]

a (not) little rant about total drama’s portrayal of dissociative identity disorder in ROTI and AS

a few little tidbits before we get into the juice…

-i don’t have DID ! i have a dissociation disorder and i’ve done a lot of research on DID, but that obviously doesn’t mean i know as much as someone in a system would. if i make any mistakes or you want to add/correct anything, please do !

-since there isn’t an official name for the system as a whole, i’m gonna use “mike system” to refer to mike, chester, svetlana, vito, manitoba, and mal as a system

-before anyone says it, i know it’s “just a kids’ show” but it’s a kids’ show i’m insane and not normal about. so i’m very passionate about this. also kids’ shows should still be normal about mental illnesses/disabilities so idc

alright stinkers… let’s get into it

ok ! mike systems DID in ROTI isn’t GOOD representation but it isn’t like. the worst out there compared to some other media. some huge positives are the way the alters have actual triggers, and that everyone in the system IS portrayed as their own person, not just an extension or part of mike. i interpret the “gasp” the body does with switches as a stand in for dissociation (since they couldn’t really have him just sit there and stare into space bc of plot/time reasons) and it’s very easy to assume the role of everyone in the system from their personalities and triggers. the best example of this to me is vito ! vito is a “tough guy” who’s triggered to front by his shirt coming off, it’s easy to put the pieces together and assume his role is a protector who formed due to sexual abuse.

obviously, the use of the outdated term multiple personality disorder, the very quick switches, the fact the writers obviously did not actually research DID and just wanted a silly crazy character, and probably more i’m forgetting rn, are NOT issues to just ignore because of the good stuff. it’s definitely NOT good or super accurate representation by any means, but i don’t think it’s exactly super bad either. it’s iffy but has redeeming qualities to it.

another plus about mike system in ROTI, even though this isn’t really part of the portrayal of DID as a disorder, is that mike has a love interest that isn’t written as a joke. i feel like having mike in a romantic relationship is a BIG positive representation wise. it’s really important to me that even though zoey is confused and weirded out when she didn’t know what was going on, once she found out mike was part of a system she became more understanding and didn’t give up on him. being part of a system doesn’t mean you can’t have a partner, friends, etc and mike being in a wholesome healthy relationship is a nice breath of fresh air compared to other media portraying DID.

NOW. LETS ADDRESS MAL AND ALL STARS. GOOD LORD.

all stars has an issue with watering down characters and making poor plot/character choices in general, and in my opinion it’s the worst with mike system. ROTI had questionable at times but ok DID rep with mike system, which is why it’s so disappointing that AS took the “evil alter” route and whatever the hell the button thing was… bc they were SO close with having ok representation and then they threw it all away for an overdone and harmful stereotype. mike system in ROTI is a MASTERPIECE compared to whatever the hell was going on in AS.

even when you take into account that in a real life system, mal is most similar to the role of a persecutor (an alter who sabotages the body’s relationships and causes harm to the body/other alters as a way to “protect” everyone in their eyes (oops ! i was wrong. a persecutor isn’t always a protector, however they can take the role of a persecutor and protector which is where i got confused. mal is a both a persecutor and protector to me)) which makes SOME of his actions explainable TO AN EXTENT, it’s clear the writers didn’t have that intent and just wanted a spooky evil alter, which is really disappointing. along with the button issue, which is just…. so insane….

i choose to believe for my own sanity that the button was sort of an emergency temporary dormancy button and that chester fr just lied/didn’t know and made something up. but that obviously isn’t canon, and IN CANON the body’s trauma and serious disorder was literally gone because of the PRESS OF A BUTTON and it is absolutely ridiculous. and it’s portrayed as a GOOD THING.

systems are systems because it is the only way the body and brain can maintain stability and live after serious repeated trauma. in a real situation with a system, if there was somehow a way to get rid of alters in literal seconds, the consequences would be ABSOLUTELY DISASTROUS and unstable. obviously, integration and dormancy CAN be a good thing depending on the system, but it is a LOOONG and complicated process and watering it down to the press of a button in your brain is so inappropriate and insensitive. literally why did they do that. it’s just so disappointing to go from what mike system was in roti to what they became in all stars.

sorry u guys i am just passionate about this