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method-to-the-madness · 5 months ago

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@littlewritingrabbit said something about War boys doing each other's war paint, and I thought that was really cute, so here's some fanart of Nux and Slit, and a teeny tiny little fic i wrote to go along with it (below the cut, around a thousand words). It takes place on their very first trip as a Lancer/Driver duo.

Enjoy :)

Nux sat down on the running board of his car, the door open. He had black clay cupped in his hand. He used his other hand to smudge it over his eyes, hoping it’ll look darker. Darker like the Imperators.

Something huge was in the works today. A big fight, something really major, and the War boys were buzzing with excitement, currently trapped within the confines of the garage and the barracks until they’re unleashed, feral. There was about ten odd minutes before they needed to leave, and Nux wanted his paint to be really chrome this time, since it was the first time he got to drive his own car. A car that belonged to him. The Nux Car.

“Oi! Nux!” Slit called, and rounded the door, sitting down next to him after roughly pushing him to the side to make room. Nux grinned, and turned to him still rubbing the powder over his second eye.

“Ready? Ready to do war?” Nux leaned forward and asked with childlike excitement. Slit leaned on the door frame and crossed his arms, kicking his feet up on Nux’s knees. Slit was starting to get taller than him, proudly taking up more space.

“Of course I am!” he said indignantly, like Nux had insulted him by suggesting that he wasn’t.

“Good. Wouldn’t want you fallin’ off the back while I’m driving,” Nux said, smudging some paint over his nose like usual.

“Wait!” Slit grabbed his wrist, pulling his hand away from his nose.

“What?”

“Your nose.”

“What about it?” Slit was still holding his wrist, looking very revved up. He opened his choppy mouth to say something, but paused like he thought twice for once. The slices up the sides of his face were still a bit red, and definitely not healed over yet. If it were up to Nux, he would’ve done them one side at a time, so you’d still be able to eat properly, and do the second side without your hands being all shaky. But that was just his thoughts on it.

“Thought you said you wanted it all shiny today, didn’t you?” Slit asked. Nux nodded, and Slit let go of his wrist. “So don’t just do the mediocre paint you do every day,” Slit said. Nux looked offended. Mediocre? Really? Nux thought the nose paint usually looked pretty chrome.

“What do you want me to do then?” he asked. Slit shrugged.

“I dunno. Could do something to match these-” he carefully tapped the still-healing scars on Nux’s lips. Slit had given those to him, detailed them really sharp so he’d look like a skeleton. Nux loved them. He thought they made him look a whole lot shinier. And scarier. Slit ran his thumb across his lips, probably just checking on the healing process, but something pinched in Nux's throat regardless.

“V8, quit smiling so wide all the time, it’ll rip the scars and you’ll get too lumpy,” Slit muttered, almost like he was saying it to himself. Nux batted his hand away.

“The paint, Slit. What about it?” He redirected. Slit nodded.

“C’mere, give me some,” he said, and took some from Nux’s hand. With his other hand, he roughly grabbed Nux’s jaw, and pulled him close, holding his canvas still. Nux nearly fell over at the sudden movement, and braced himself on the driver’s seat under Slit's arm. “If you do it… like so…” Slit paused, and Nux felt him dragging the paint over his nose, higher up than he usually did. “Then you’ll look soo…” he trailed off and squinted, finely focused on his work. Nux’s eyes crossed trying to see what he was doing.

“So what?” he asked. Slit finished up his paint, and pushed him back, letting go of his face. Nux sat back against the door frame

“So chrome,” Slit said, and frowned, then pulled him back again to fix up some of the paint.

“Glory me, you sap. Can we go make some war now, or will you keep fussing over my face?” Nux laughed, turning away. Slit’s hands chased after him, to throw the finishing touches on his paint. Nux stood up to check his reflection in the grubby side-view mirror on the other side of the door.

“I’m no sap!” Slit protested, standing up and following him. He shoved Nux’s shoulder, sending him stumbling towards the car.

“Cut it out! I can’t even stand long enough to see what you’ve done to me!” Nux protested half-heartedly. He bent down to look in the mirror.

Usually he would just smear some black over his nose vaguely in a circle shape, but Slit had taken some more clay and spread it pointy up the sides of his nose like a skeleton.

“Yeah?” Slit asked, like he was looking for Nux’s approval.

“Very shiny,” Nux smiled in the mirror before standing up.

“Very shiny,” Slit agreed.

From across the garage, the Ace yelled, “WAR BOYS! MOVE OUT!” Everyone echoed it, spreading the command like fire through the garage.

Nux punched Slit’s shoulder as a goodbye, and got into the driver’s seat while Slit climbed onto the lancer’s perch at the back. Nux opened the roof so he could hear better, and shut the door. His fingers drummed on the wheel, in time with the Doof's drums.

Once they were on the ground under the elevator, all the Drivers got in formation, every vehicle being taken filed out into the open air of the Citadel. They idled in the sunlight, buzzing with held in kamakrazee excitement. Everyone was shaking all feral-like, ready to get out on the open road.

“WE ARE WAR BOYS!” The Ace shouted from the front.

“WAR BOYS!” they all chorused. Nux stuck his head out the window to be heard better, and felt Slit bang on the roof in tempo with the chant.

“VIOLENT CRAZY WAR BOYS!” The Ace shouted.

“WAR BOYS!” The ensemble screamed back at him. Nux could hear Slit on the back of the truck, and his heartbeat thrummed in his ears. It’s his day.

“TODAY WE’RE FIGHTING BUZZARDS!” The Ace announced.

“BUZZARDS!” The War Boys shouted back.

“AND TODAY WE’RE RAIDING NOMADS!”

“NOMADS!”

Every driver revved his engine as the Ace climbed back onto the war rig. Nux banged on the ceiling twice, and Slit whooped from the back.

“MOVE OUT!” The Ace called. They couldn’t really hear him over the roar of engines, but they all knew he said it. Then they took off, leaving behind dirty clouds, and spraying sand in their wake.

#Nux #Slit #i just think they're neat #i made this like last december back when I didn't know how to draw muscles #and was also pretty new to the fandom #so please humour me #YES I'M AWARE THAT SLIT'S STAPLES ARE ON THE OTHER SIDE #BUT I'M ONLY HUMAN #war boy fanart #mad max #war boys #mmfr #mad max fanart #slit/nux

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jmbringitonworld · 1 month ago

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How I Married Your Father

AO3 link for those who prefer to read fics there

This silly idea came to my friend and I, and we imagined some scenes for it. And when it comes to silly ideas, well... I just can't seem to resist writing them out. I also can't seem to resist injecting fluff into everything I write. How did this get so long?? @a-snowpoff this is all your fault.

Is any of this funny? You tell me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

______________________________

It all started with a ring.

Well, technically it all started when I met Papyrus, but the trouble really began with the ring.

See, Papyrus and I had been good friends for a while - to the point I was comfortable with letting him stay in the spare room at my place, when he moved out to give his brother and sister-in-law some space and privacy. We’d hung out together a few times, and had even gotten to know each other’s friends.

We’d also occasionally gift each other things we’d seen and thought the other would like. Just little things, like oven mitts, a new apron, plates with interesting flame patterns, cool action figures, bones of varying sizes… you know, just knick-knacks and such. Nothing too fancy.

And then one day Papyrus gave me a ring.

It was a sparkly piece of jewellery, very well-made and clearly quite pricey, and I was very reluctant to accept it. But Papyrus looked so excited, so hopeful, and even a little nervous (as he did with anything he gifted me to be honest)�� I just didn’t have the heart to refuse. No one with a heart would’ve been able to deny him.

“DO YOU LIKE MY PRESENT??” he asked me, bones vibrating ever so slightly as he looked to be on the verge of bouncing on his feet.

I didn’t need to force the smile that spread so wide across my face that my cheeks started hurting.

“Yes.” I tried the ring on each of my fingers. It fit my ring finger perfectly. “I love it! Thank you Paps.”

The smile he gave me in return was more brilliant than any precious gem.

I had no idea what that ring would come to mean.

And neither did Papyrus, as it turned out.

—

“WHAT???”

Papyrus’s eye sockets widened in shock as he stared at Alphys, his friend, gifted scientist, and expert on humans (probably).

The shorter monster shuffled her feet nervously under his incredulous gaze, and reflexively scooted a little closer to her wife.

“O-oh, you d-didn’t know that humans give their partner a ring to p-propose? Uh, propose marriage that is.”

Papyrus shook his head.

“NO!! I HAD NO IDEA!! MY DATING GUIDEBOOK DIDN’T MENTION ANYTHING ABOUT MARRIAGE!!! IT ONLY SAID THAT GIVING YOUR PARTNER A RING WAS THE NEXT IMPORTANT STEP TO ADVANCE YOUR ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP!!”

He took out a badly chewed up book from… somewhere… and proceeded to riffle through what remained of its pages.

Sans eyed the book with a raised browbone. “uh, paps? it looks like something took a bite or ten outta your book.”

The younger skeleton monster glared at the book in remembered offence.

“IT’S THAT MISCREANT MUTT!!” He stomped his foot, scarf flailing through the air from the force of his agitation. “IT KEEPS CHEWING THROUGH MY THINGS!! NOT CONTENT TO STEAL MY SPECIAL ATTACKS, IT TRIED TO EAT MY DATING GUIDEBOOK!! AND MY HANGOUT GUIDEBOOK!! AND EVEN MY COOKBOOKS!! ALL FIFTY SEVEN OF THEM!!!”

Asgore frowned in concern. “Do you think it has a toothache from eating so many bones?”

Papyrus stomped his foot harder. “WELL I HAVE A SKULLACHE FROM IT VANDALISING MY BELONGINGS!!”

Toriel gave him a pacifying smile. “There, there. Books can be replaced; your health cannot. Do not lose your skull over this!”

The former queen giggled at her own joke and Sans’s grin widened. Papyrus looked to be on the verge of exploding, both figuratively and literally, with the way his bones rattled. Luckily, Undyne interjected before the situation could devolve further.

“Ngahhh!! Forget about nerd books and hungry dogs! What about the proposal?! Did your human say yes?!”

Papyrus paused and considered his friend’s question for a moment.

“HMMM…” He gasped. “SHE DID! SHE DEFINITELY SAID YES!”

Undyne leaned forward eagerly, eyes flitting between Papyrus and Alphys.

“So! Does that mean Papyrus and his human are married?!”

Everyone’s gaze focused on Alphys, awaiting her deduction. The current Royal Scientist shrunk under the weight of their expectation. She looked a little panicked, but with one glance at her wife’s toothy grin and shining eyes, she bolstered her courage and blurted out, “I-I guess so”.

Cheers and whoops rang out, as everyone congratulated Papyrus on his marriage. Only Sans looked hesitant. His murmured “maybe we should ask frisk about this” was lost amongst the jubilation.

—

From then on, Papyrus became even more… affectionate? Attentive? Dare I say, almost doting towards me. Not that he was cold before, quite the opposite. He was always a kind and caring friend; thoughtful, warm-hearted, enthusiastic and ever-supportive, truly the best pal a girl could ask for honestly.

But he was noticeably more intense in his efforts to be the best friend to me he could be.

And, in all honesty, it was getting me increasingly flustered.

Every day, Papyrus would wake me up in the morning with breakfast in bed, and we’d chat about our respective plans for the day as we ate. Afterwards, as I would get ready, Papyrus would pack the elaborate lunch he’d somehow found the time to prepare for me, and then send me off with a hug as big and warm as his heart (his metaphorical heart; I still had no idea whether or not skeleton monsters had literal hearts).

The way he’d rub his nasal bone against my nose as he held me close sent all sorts of butterflies fluttering around inside me. But I’d guessed it was simply a sign of affection between monsters. Papyrus was always very demonstrative with his feelings after all. He never left me in any doubt that I was important to him.

It was one of the many things I loved about him.

And there sure was a lot to love.

It was no surprise that my feelings for Papyrus had turned romantic fairly early on in our relationship.

He was so honest and upfront about himself, so earnest in his efforts and steadfast in his ambitions, and always wearing his heart on his sleeve (so to speak), that you knew very quickly what kind of man- er, monster he was. There was never any hint of artifice with him and he didn’t have a single malicious bone in his skeletal body.

I knew that I could trust him, completely, that I could always rely on him and that he would never let me down.

And he never did. He was my anchor in every storm that came my way.

More than that, he always strived to be his best self in a way that I couldn’t help but admire. He even encouraged me, time and again, to be my best self.

He made me want to do better, want to be better.

He made me believe I could.

“Which is exactly why you should be honest with him about how you feel about him!” Frisk argued, over tea and cakes one afternoon.

I bit my lip and looked away from her determined gaze. “But what if he doesn’t feel the same way about me?”

“But what if he does?” Frisk shot back.

I stared into my cup as if it held the answers I sought. Frisk sighed and reached over to place her hand atop mine, arresting my gaze when I looked up.

“Look, even if Papy doesn’t like you like that - which I doubt, I’m sure that guy is just as crazy about you as you are about him,” she insisted, voice full of conviction.

I blinked, wondering how she could be so confident, as if there wasn’t a doubt in her mind as to the truth of her words. It must’ve been because she was Papyrus’s second ever friend and his sister-in-law.

Frisk continued on, with the kind of determination that could move mountains, or break barriers. “But even if he isn’t, doesn’t he deserve your honesty?”

I wilted, forced to acknowledge her point. “You’re right. Paps is always honest with me, and I owe it to him to be honest with him in return.”

Frisk gave me a pleased smile. She turned the hand she was holding in hers and gave it an encouraging squeeze. I squeezed back, trying not to let my doubts overtake me, even as the fear of possible rejection was making my heart pound in my ears.

“I just-… Everything’s been going so well between us and I’m afraid of messing it all up! What if I ruin our friendship?!”

—

“I LOVE MY WONDERFUL WIFE! WE ARE SO HAPPY TOGETHER! NYEH HEH HEH!!” Papyrus’s cheerful voice boomed throughout the room.

Undyne guffawed and thumped him on the back with enough force to almost send him to his knees. “That’s great, Papyrus! I’m so happy to hear you’ve found your special someone, too! Now everyone’s happy! Man, we oughta celebrate or something.”

Alphys perked up and clapped her hands in delight. “Ooh! That’s a great idea! M-Maybe we can all go on a group holiday together? Like a c-couples’ retreat? It’s n-not like I had one in mind already or anything, eheheh…”

Papyrus’s face lit up, his eye sockets sparkling. “THAT SOUNDS SPECTACULAR!! AND FUN!” He pumped a fist into the air. “I CAN’T WAIT TO SHOW EVERYONE WHAT A GREAT COUPLE THE GREAT PAPYRUS AND HIS GREAT WIFE MAKE!! NYEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!!”

Sans took one look at his brother’s ecstatic grin and his friends’ equally excited faces, and gulped down the rest of his ketchup.

“oh boy, this’ll be… interestin’.”

—

One of the first things I’d learned about Papyrus was that he loved to cook. He hadn’t always been very good at it according to his friends and family, but since coming to the surface, he’d made every effort to improve his skills. And his efforts had eventually paid off, as I could whole-heartedly attest to.

I’m not sure exactly when or how it started - it felt like a lifetime ago - but at some point I’d offered to cook dinner with him and it quickly became a daily routine for us.

It was as I was stirring the tomatoes into the sauce, that I finally mustered up enough courage to broach the topic of my less-than-platonic feelings for him.

I cleared my throat nervously. “Um, Papyrus? There’s, uh, something I wanted to… share with you. Or let you know. Or, ugh.” I rubbed my temple, annoyed at myself and my poor attempts to get the right words out. “I just wanted to tell you something.”

He looked up from the gently simmering pot of spaghetti and tilted his skull my way. His smile was bright and encouraging, and he seemed completely unphased by my fumbled words. “I’M ALL EARS.”

I glanced at the sides of his skull and the complete lack of any ears, and tried to bite back a grin. It was as successful as my attempt at a confession. However, it managed to lift my spirits and calm my nerves enough for my next words to come out more easily.

“Papyrus, I…” I took a deep breath, cleared all thoughts from my head and ploughed on. “I like you!”

Papyrus didn’t even hesitate as he gave me a beaming smile and told me, “I LIKE YOU TOO!”

I couldn’t help but return his smile, as I tried to clarify what I’d meant. “No, I mean romantically. I-, I’m in love with you Papyrus.”

Papyrus’s smile didn’t budge an inch, though his chest did puff out a bit. “WELL I WOULD SURE HOPE MY WIFE WOULD FEEL THAT WAY! ALSO! I AM GLAD TO HEAR THAT YOU DO! ALSO ALSO!! I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU TOO!! NYEH HEH!”

I stared at him. “...What?”

He stared back. “WHAT?”

—

Finding out that Papyrus not only loved me back but was, in fact, fully convinced that he and I were married (which, how? How did he get such an idea?) was not the only shocking news I found out that evening.

I also learned that all of his friends also believed that the two of us were married (how? How??).

And then Papyrus cheerfully informed me that his friends had planned a group holiday for all of us to go on. As couples. Married couples (how did it come to this!? What deity did I accidentally insult to curse me like this??).

The rest of the night passed by in a blur, as my mind reeled from the barrage of bombshells Papyrus had so enthusiastically dropped on me.

The only thought which managed to stick out amongst the jumbled mess of my mind, was that I needed to correct Papyrus. And his friends. Somehow.

—

My first chance came when Alphys caught me as I was heading out the next day.

After her usual polite, if stuttering greeting, she handed me an envelope.

“Here are yours and Papyrus’s tickets for the hotel we’ll be staying in. Don’t worry, I booked a nice room for you two to sh-share.”

I opened my mouth, not sure of what, exactly, I was going to say, but knowing that I needed to say something.

However Alphys kept talking, excitement hurrying her speech. “I’m really looking forward to getting to know you even better on the trip! I-I hope we can all be really good friends. A-Anyway, I need to go and hand out the rest of the tickets. See you on the day we head out!” She then turned around and proceeded to power walk away, waving to me over her shoulder, as her final words rushed out, “Please don’t be late because this place has a no refunds policy okay bye!”

As I remained rooted to the spot, staring dumbly after her rapidly retreating figure, I realised that my mouth was still open. I closed it with a resounding *clack*.

Well that could’ve gone better.

—

Things continued along the same vein, going decidedly not better.

All Papyrus could talk about was the upcoming group holiday and how excited he was for it.

All I could think about was how in the hell I was supposed to break it to him and everyone else that he and I were not actually married.

“What do I do?!” I’m not ashamed to admit that I was practically whining to Frisk at this point, but who could blame me?

Frisk just shrugged at me. “Dunno,” she mumbled around the straw in her mouth, and took another slurp of her milkshake.

I buried my head in my hands.

Frisk seemed to take pity on me and threw her free arm around my shoulders.

“Hey, c’mon, it’s not that bad.”

I looked up from my hands to shoot her an incredulous look. She winked at me, lips turning up suggestively as she leaned in closer to me.

“You get to share a bed with Papyrus,” she purred, as if the thought hadn’t been stuck in my head since Alphys’s visit. I could feel my cheeks burn at the insinuation in her words and tone. “You love him. And you know that he loves you too. Enough to be happy at the belief that you’re married.” My face felt like it was on fire. “So what’s the problem? Isn’t this something you were hoping for?”

She wiggled her eyebrows at me, ever the flirt-master. I shoved my hand in her face and pushed her away, unable to look her in the eye. Frisk went along with the motion, laughing airily at me.

I didn’t need to say anything. My expression spoke loud and clear to her. She’d clearly picked up her husband’s ability to read people - it was one of the things that made her such an effective ambassador for monsters. That and her unwavering determination (also perhaps her terrifying talent at flirting everyone into submission).

I grumbled, wishing my blush would die down. “M-Maybe... But not now! I’m still getting used to the idea that Paps likes me back!”

“He loves you back, you mean,” Frisk interjected. My blush returned with a vengeance.

“Y-yeah, that.” I exhaled in frustrated embarrassment. “I just don’t know if I’m ready to-... to share a b-bed with him yet.”

Frisk raised an eyebrow at me, crossing her arms.

“This is Papyrus we’re talking about. Has he ever given you any reason to believe he wouldn’t respect your wishes? That he wouldn’t do everything in his power to make sure you’re comfortable?” She didn’t give me any time to reply, but she didn’t need to. The answer was obvious. “You’re the one who told me about how you trust him completely, and that he’d never once let you down. So stop worrying about this. Just have fun on this trip and enjoy yourself. You can think about how to clear up this marriage misunderstanding later.”

Her words made sense. I would be fine. Papyrus would make sure of it, as he always did. I might be a little flustered - or a lot flustered - but we would be together, and in love, and that would be enough. It would be more than enough.

I slowly started to relax, beginning to get excited about the prospect of a holiday with the one I loved and our group of friends.

And then Frisk leaned in close again to whisper into my ear, “Don’t forget to pack some sexy lingerie. You have a ‘husband’ to sweep off his feet now.”

There was no way I would be fine.

—

When the time finally came to leave for the trip our friends had planned, Papyrus was a ball of excitement, practically bouncing off the walls, whereas I was a ball of nerves, bouncing off the walls for very different reasons.

“CAREFUL BELOVED!” Papyrus reached out towards me just in time to stop me from crashing into the doorframe.

I looked up at him, trying to shake away the turbulent thoughts infesting my head.

“Sorry Paps. And thanks. I’m just a little, uh, distracted. Excited for the trip and all, haha…!”

I gave him my best attempt at a reassuring smile.

Papyrus looked unconvinced.

He frowned down at me, concern etched into his features. He gently grasped my hands in his own gloved ones, and gazed deeply into my eyes.

“MY LOVE, I KNOW THAT I HAVE NOT ALWAYS BEEN THE MOST… PERCEPTIVE MONSTER.” He frowned, some distant memory playing in his mind’s eye, before he refocused his gaze on me. “HOWEVER! I COULD NEVER FAIL TO NOTICE THAT YOU - MY ONE AND ONLY LOVE, THE GREATEST JOY IN MY LIFE, MY DEAREST WIFE - ARE NOT AS EXCITED ABOUT THIS SUPER FUN LOVEY-DOVEY COUPLES’ VACATION AS I’D HOPED YOU WOULD BE.”

Guilt started to bubble in the pit of my stomach at the way his expression fell at that.

But before I could try to reassure him, or offer him what would ultimately be empty words of assurance, he cut me off.

“IF SOMETHING IS BOTHERING YOU, THEN PLEASE TELL ME.” He gave my hands a squeeze. The gesture shot straight to my heart like Cupid’s arrow. “I PROMISE THAT I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM A GREAT LISTENER!! I AM ALSO VERY PATIENT! AND VERY WISE! AND VERY UNDERSTANDING! AS WELL AS VERY COOL!”

A fierce affection for this amazing monster filled me to my core. I wanted to kiss him at this moment.

“I know, Paps. You are all that and more. So much more.”

Papyrus’s proud expression was so familiar and so dear to me. I really wanted to kiss him.

“NYEH HEH HEH! THANK YOU BELOVED! I AM HAPPY YOU RECOGNISE THAT!” Then his face softened a little, a gentleness entering his voice. “AND I HOPE YOU ALSO RECOGNISE HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU. AND HOW MUCH I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY, EVEN IF IT MEANS WE DON’T GO ON SUPER FUN LOVEY-DOVEY COUPLES’ VACATIONS WITH OUR FRIENDS.”

He leaned forward and pressed his forehead to mine. I could see tiny glimmers of light deep within his dark eye sockets.

“BEING WITH YOU IS MORE FUN THAN ANYTHING. EVEN MORE THAN COOKING! EVEN MORE THAN CREATING TRAPS AND PUZZLES! BUT IT IS ONLY FUN IF YOU ARE ALSO HAVING FUN.”

That was it. I couldn’t take it anymore.

Before Papyrus could say another word, I tilted my head to finally give him the kiss I’d been longing for.

Papyrus made a small sound of surprise, before leaning into the kiss, reciprocating my affection with all the passion and zeal I’d come to expect from him, and then some. It took my breath away.

As the both of us lost ourselves in our first (but definitely not last!) kiss, I resolved myself to push away all of my concerns. They were pointless and would only get in the way of an enjoyable holiday with the monster I loved and the friends we both cherished.

I just needed to keep up a positive mental attitude, just like Papyrus always maintained.

—

That positive mental attitude managed to see me through the whole of the first day, which, just as Papyrus had promised, was full of fun. I had such a great time that I forgot all of my previous worries.

Which then promptly came crashing back down on me when Papyrus and I entered our shared bedroom that night, and I beheld our one bed.

Papyrus, ever the gentleman (gentlemonster?), offered to let me use the adjoining bathroom first to get ready, which I gladly accepted.

Afterwards, as I sunk into the large and luxuriously comfy sheets of the king-sized bed, I could feel my pulse speed up.

When I heard the bathroom door open, I glanced over to see Papyrus step out, dressed in simple pyjamas with little pasta patterns.

I could feel my face heat up and my ears start to ring as the tall skeleton monster made his way towards the bed I was lying in.

He came to a stop right in front of me.

I held my breath, a mixture of anticipation and nerves flooding my system.

This was it.

Anything could happen.

—

“So? What happened?” Frisk leaned forward, eager and impatient for me to spill the beans on my first night with Papyrus.

“He tucked me into bed and read me a bedtime story.”

“Wait what?”

“You heard me.” I slumped in my seat and fought back a yawn. “He then spent the rest of the night doing prep work for his cooking. I don’t know if he slept at all, ‘cause when I woke up the next morning, he’d moved on to making models of me out of papier mâché. Incredibly detailed and life-like models. He said he wanted to ‘capture his wonderful wife’s incredible cuteness’. If it were anyone else I’d be creeped out, but with Paps I think it’s kinda sweet.”

Frisk visibly deflated. She sat back and crossed her arms, head tilting in consideration.

“That does sound like him. Very… Papyrus. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.” She heaved a big sigh. “Looks like Sansy and I need to tell Papy to up his game.”

That sure woke me up.

“No thank you! I think Papyrus has plenty of game as is!”

“Well then it’s up to you to make the first move,” she said as she poked me on the forehead. “After all, Papy is the one who proposed. Even though it was Alphys who said that it meant you two were married.”

I shot up in my seat, eyes wide. “Wait you knew all about this!?”

Frisk gave a casual nod of her head. “Sans told me.” I threw my hands in the air in frustration. “Why didn’t you say anything?! Tell them the truth?!”

Frisk merely shrugged her shoulders, uncaring in the face of my annoyance. “Not my place to interfere. They didn’t ask me, so I didn’t say anything.”

Which… fair, I guessed. It was technically my problem to fix. Besides, Frisk had always been very hands-off when it came to others’ affairs, only intervening before things got really serious.

I deflated, my brief ire draining out of me.

Frisk patted my head in what would’ve been sympathy, if not for the amused smirk making its way across her face.

“And besides,” her smirk widened, showing her teeth, “it was so funny seeing you all blushy and flustered!”

“Now I see why Sans married you! You’re both trolls!”

Frisk just laughed in my face.

—

Later that day, in an attempt to make it up to me, Frisk gathered the whole group together, so that I could make an announcement and finally clear up the misunderstanding. She’d even whispered to me that Sans had told Papyrus that humans weren’t legally married until they’d had a wedding, to ease that particular burden from my shoulders. And because Sans wanted to let his younger brother down gently. The rest, though, was up to me.

It was a daunting task, but I couldn’t let this situation go on any longer.

I nervously cleared my throat, trying desperately to steel my nerves in the face of so many expectant eyes. Frisk and Sans gave me thumbs up and smiled at me in encouragement. Papyrus stood by my side, and I took comfort from his steady presence.

“So uhhh… I’d like to clear up a little… misunderstanding.” I paused to take a fortifying breath. “See, Papyrus and I… we’re not… married.”

Silence.

Until-

“Wait what?!” Undyne slammed her hands down onto the table. “Don’t tell me you two got a divorce!”

What.

I could feel my jaw drop.

Alphys looked to be on the verge of tears as she wrung her hands. “B-But you two seemed so happy together!”

Papyrus stepped closer to me and threw an arm around my shoulders. “WE ARE HAPPY TOGETHER!!” He drew me close to his side and thumped a fist against his chest. “AND I PROMISE TO MAKE SURE THAT WE WILL ALWAYS BE HAPPY TOGETHER!! NYEH!!”

Toriel clapped a hand to her chest and heaved a huge sigh. “Oh that’s such a relief! I’m so glad that you two are happily married.”

Asgore beamed at us. “Yes! And may your marriage be long and full of joy!”

I could only stare dumbfounded at everyone. How did things like this keep happening to me?

I looked towards Frisk and Sans. The couple exchanged glances, before shrugging and giving me thumbs up.

I turned to Papyrus, who seemed almost as confused as I was by this unexpected turn of events. But as always, he had clearly taken it in his stride and was now puffing up under everyone’s unanimous support and offering everyone his thanks.

I looked down at my feet for a moment, before sighing in defeat.

If you can’t beat them, join them.

“...Thanks guys.”

I guess I just had to accept the fact that I was married now.

I glanced towards Papyrus’s big, bright smile, happiness shining in his face. He noticed my gaze and turned his skull towards me, his smile getting impossibly bigger and brighter. I couldn’t help my own smile forming in response.

Maybe this wasn’t such a bad thing after all. At least I was married to someone I truly loved and who loved me in return. And honestly, who could ask for more?

As I leaned into my “husband”’s side, I felt my worries fade away.

Yeah, being married to Papyrus was definitely my happy ending.

—

“And that, kids, is how I married your father,” I ended my story and smiled at my children’s cheers. Even Papyrus cheered along with them.

My eldest then looked at me, head tilted in curiosity. “So… did you and Dad ever get married for real?”

I chuckled. “Yep. Eventually.” I shared a fond look with Papyrus at the memory of our wedding.

My youngest frowned, brows furrowed cutely in thought. I wanted to reach over and smooth away the adorable crease. “But did Dad ever actually propose to you?”

I paused. Now that I thought about it… He never did. I blinked in surprise.

Papyrus seemed to have come to the same realisation.

He leapt to his feat, before dramatically kneeling in front of me. He clasped my hands in both of his and gazed into my eyes with the most serious look I’d ever seen on his face.

“DARLING WIFE! LOVE OF MY LIFE! YOU ARE MORE PRECIOUS TO ME THAN ALL THE STARS IN THE SKY. MY SOUL SHINES ONLY FOR YOU. WILL YOU MARRY ME?”

I could feel warmth spread across my cheeks and blossom in my chest.

“Papyrus, we’re already married,” I reminded him, not bothering to fight back my smile at his loving words.

My husband just grinned at me.

“IS THAT A YES?”

I giggled.

“Yes. Always yes.”

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