#so many people assume i'm a girl cause i have a high voice and my chest is kinda large

[fakeoldmanfucker]

Props to Dan the 50-year-old lawyer for not only talking about socialism to like 9 college kids...but Also staying afterwards to talk to me and another guy for An Hour in a lecture hall. This guy is two degrees removed from Bill Kuntsler! (That's like three degrees from Phil Ochs!) And for asking my pronouns and being able to tell I'm some sort of genderqueer!

[nixie-writes]

Here's something I wrote while high on pain pills

I pulled the plot for this out of my ass and it's a little wonky because I was feeling wonky and now I'm wearing a wrist brace lol. Under the cut because it's 8 pages long lmao

Willow belongs to @willowaudreykeyes , Nixie belongs to me

Willow’s POV

It was a long day. I had many patients today, most of them arriving hoping to get narcotics, which I rarely prescribe. A lot of Hell has drug abusers. I did, however, prescribe Xanax to a young trans girl who had panic attacks when she thought about her family abandoning her. I felt bad for the poor thing, alone in a world that doesn’t support trans people very well. Regardless it had been a long day and I was ready to retire for the night. 

At least, that was the plan. I was taking off my bloody gloves when Alastor burst into my office, the body of a small child in his arms. The sinner child couldn’t have been older than 5. He was beaten, bruised and bloody. How did he end up in Hell? I motioned Alastor to put him on my operating table so I could get a better look at him. 

I parted his black hair and found a healed bullet wound. That explained how he died; it must have been recently if he still had the scar. I looked down at his arms and saw several scrapes but nothing severe. He had a stab wound in his stomach, covered by his hand. He seemed reluctant to let me see it. I gently pulled his hand away and examined the stab wound. It was shallow and not bleeding heavily, likely caused by a kitchen knife. His kneecap was busted, he would never walk properly again. The bone was shattered, I could feel the pieces beneath his skin. When I touched his kneecap he cried out in pain, recoiling. I moved on to his other knee, which appeared fine. Aside from the shallow stab wound and his busted kneecap he was okay; I could get him bandaged in no time flat. 

“Alastor, where did you find him?” I asked; Alastor looked away. “I caught a gang of demons hitting him. They’re past tense now but they were beating him badly. I found him like this,” Alastor explained in a hurried voice. “Can you help him?” Alastor begged. I knew he had a soft spot for children but he seemed especially concerned for this child. “I’ll need some supplies from the living world to patch up his stab wound, can you sit with him until I’m back? The bleeding has stopped but I imagine he doesn’t want to be left alone,” I requested. Alastor nodded his head in response. “I’ll take good care of him my dear,” he promised. 

Nixie’s POV

I was busy with Niffty, folding up clothes. I tried my best to mimic the perfect way she folded towels but I was no good at it. “Don’t worry Miss Nixie, you’ll get it eventually!” She encouraged me. I appreciated that she believed in me. I slowly folded a towel, freezing when I heard a door fly open. It was probably Angel coming back to the hotel high off his ass on Xanax again, so I ignored it and continued folding. 

I was almost done folding the clothes with Niffty when Willow appeared in the door frame. “Nixie, a word please?” She requested. I patted Niffty on the head and walked to the door frame, leaning on it. “What’s up?” I inquired, leaning on the door ledge. Willow told me about a young sinner child who came in severely beaten and she needed products from the living world to fully take care of him. I rose back to full height, surprised at what she told me. 

“Can I come? You know Hellborns can enter the living world,” I persisted. Willow looked hesitant but sighed and gave in. “Yeah, you can come. More arms to carry more supplies,” she agreed. I dusted off my work uniform and followed Willow to her room, where she drew portals to visit the living world. This was my first time visiting the human world so I wanted to present my best. 

Willow took a pen to her wall and drew a circle with odd symbols. “I assume the guy with a cane stuck up his ass taught you that?” Willow rolled her eyes. “No; I’m part angel, remember? I can transverse dimensions too. I learned this from Lucifer,” she explained as she finished the circle. The portal glowed and opened, revealing a blue sky, green grass and fresh air. It was a far cry from the stifling hot air of Hell. Willow stepped through the portal and I followed. 

Taking in a deep breath I sighed happily. “I could get used to this place, I see why sinners miss it so much,” I commented. I glanced over at Willow, who had taken a human form. Her hair was still brown but her skin was almond colored and she only had two arms. “What happened to you??” I asked incredulously. Willow rolled her eyes. “In the human world you have to take up a disguise so no one suspects you’re a demon,” she explained as if she expected me to know that. 

Lifting my head I imagined how I would look as a human - blue wavy hair, pale skin and with the same body type I had now. Taking a deep breath I concentrated as hard as I could and I felt magic swirling around me. When I opened my eyes I only saw out of one, the other blinded. It was weird not having depth perception. 

“It gets easier with time,” Willow assured me as she took off at a brisk pace. I followed after her, glancing around. Insects with pretty wings fluttered around. One flew right in my face and I jumped back. “Nixie, it's a butterfly,” Willow sighed. “They’re harmless. It just wants to know if you’re a flower or not,” I stood still while the insect landed on my hand and examined me with its proboscis, tasting my skin. I shuddered at the sight, I did not like the insects in the living world. After a few moments the butterfly lifted back up into the sky. “They’re pretty from a distance but I don’t want one on me ever again,” I commented as we continued our journey. 

As we briskly walked we came upon a garden. The flowers were many colors, more than the shades of red in Hell. I plucked a yellow flower with star-shaped petals and presented it to Willow. “What plant is this?” I inquired. Willow sighed, rubbing her temple. “It’s a daffodil Nixie. We need to keep going,” she insisted. I buried the flower so it could regrow and followed Willow, who was getting more irritated with me every time I stopped. 

We left the park behind us and found ourselves in a small city. Willow looked around, presumably trying to find the building where her supplies would be. I noticed a sign on a small gas station that advertised cigarettes. “Willow you stay here, I gotta make a pit stop,” I told her, walking towards the gas station.

Upon entering the gas station I was met with a rainbow of lights, blinding me for a moment. Glancing around I found the employee and approached him. “Hey bud, a pack of Newport 100’s please,” I requested. He asked for my ID. Luckily I was smart enough to have a fake one made by a sinner. I presented it and he looked at it for a full 3 seconds before passing it back to me and grabbing my cigarettes. I handed him the cash I had in my pocket and left, opening the pack to smoke a cigarette real quick.

Willow’s POV

I watched as Nixie entered the gas station, my face dead panned. I thought she came to help but instead she’s on a tour of this city. I couldn’t go looking in supermarkets for my supplies until she came out, I needed her help carrying supplies. I watched as she exited the gas station, lighting a cigarette in the process. I stomped over to her. 

“Nixie, the hell are you doing? We have an injured child and you’re worried about cigarettes??” Nixie shrugged. “They’re cheaper here than they are in Hell,” she reasoned. It was a good reason to take advantage of the cheap prices. 

“Well, keep your cancer stick away from me and let’s get these supplies,” I told her, taking her free hand to make sure she didn’t wander off again, and made my way through the city looking for the medical store. 

Alastor’s POV

With the two women gone I was left alone with a sobbing child. It was awkward. If this were an adult I would take immense pleasure in seeing them writhe in pain but this poor child was suffering and for once, I felt bad for him. 

“Tell me kiddo, who sent those demons to beat you?” I asked him, trying to weasel out information about my next target. The child coughed, his body wracking with the effort. “My… my father,” he replied. “He thought I was a mistake and wanted me gone,” he explained between grunts of pain. I felt a fire light inside my chest. Every child deserves a loving parent, but not every parent deserves a child. “What’s your name sweetheart?” I cooed, trying to relax the child. He looked at me for a moment before staring back up at the ceiling. “My name is Andrew,” he stated. So, Andrew’s father put out a hit on him. I knew a certain demon who talked about his unwanted son Andrew. I’d pay him a less than savory visit later, but for now I was focused on Andrew, who had his hands covering his stomach wound as though he was protecting it. 

“It hurts,” Andrew whined. I wasn’t sure what to do but I knew Willow had a stash of painkillers in her safe, and I knew the combination. Opening the safe I pulled out a bottle that read Tylenol. I knew it was a painkiller and emptied two pills into my hand. I put away the pill bottle and turned back to Andrew, filing a cup with water. “These pills will help with your pain. They’re not big, they're easy to swallow.” I soothed him as I approached. I held him down by his shoulders and dropped the two pills in his mouth, holding the glass of water to his lips. He drank fervently, swallowing the pills. “Can I have more? I’m so thirsty,” he sounded hoarse. I didn’t like it but I would have to use Nixie’s water to hydrate him. I reached into Willow’s fridge and pulled out a bottle of Nixie’s water. I held it to Andrew’s lips and he guzzled the water. When he finished he laid back down on the table, a little more light in his eyes. 

“I miss my mother,” Andrew hummed. I cocked my head to one side. “Where is she?” I inquired. “She’s still alive as far as I know,” he replied. I placed my chin on one hand, the other on my leg. “So how did your father die?” I asked. Andrew shrugged. “I don’t know. He never liked to be around me,” he explained. I felt my anger towards Andrew’s father continue to grow. 

“Don’t worry about it, try to get some rest,” I suggested as I placed a blanket over Andrew. He snuggled into the bed and shifted onto his side. His stomach was no longer bleeding and the scab looked good enough to hold. Exhausted, I sat in Willow’s chair and opened a book. How she did this every day was beyond me. 

Willow’s POV

I held Nixie’s hand like she was a toddler and finally found a supermarket that sold the stuff I needed for my patient. I pulled her inside and released her hand. “You have a little money, spend it wisely,” I warned her as I walked off to the pharmacy. I noticed Nixie running to the candy like a child and rolled my eyes. 

I approached the pharmacist. “Hello, I need bandaging, rubbing alcohol and self-adhesive sports wraps, please,” I requested. I knew I couldn’t make a cast for the kid’s knee but I could at least clean him up and wrap his knee so it doesn’t hurt as bad. The pharmacist looked like she really didn’t want to be there, but turned into the pharmacy to get what I requested. As I was waiting I noticed Nixie approaching me, eating peach rings. “Are you gonna be done with those before I need your help?” I inquired. She nodded, popping another one in her mouth. “I’m almost done, and it doesn’t look like anyone’s in a rush to get what you asked for,” she noted. I hated that she was right. Would they move faster if they knew it was for a kid?

While we were waiting a young man approached us, brushing his hair back with his hand. “What’s two pretty little things like you two doing alone? Don’t you want a man to protect you?” He asked, flexing his tricep while he brushed back his hair. Before I could respond Nixie snapped at him, “we both have men, we’re not interested,” she retorted. The man scoffed. “Clearly they weren’t interested in making sure you two were safe.” I could see Nixie’s one magenta eye narrowing, she looked ready to pounce on him. He turned his attention to me and approached me. “I’m sure I could show you things your boyfriend could never do for you,” he suggested. I didn’t understand the context, but before I could ask Nixie walked up behind him and kicked the back of his knees, making him fold to the ground. She grabbed him by a pressure point and pressed down hard enough to leave a mark. “I believe I said we both have men,” she growled. In her anger she was beginning to lose her human form, water dripping from her fingers. 

“Nixie, I think he gets the message,” I insisted. She snorted contemptuously but let him go. He spun on us. “You’re both a pair of bitches, you know that? I could do so much better than almond milk and the feminist behind me,” he snarled as he stood up to leave. Nixie grabbed a box of batteries and threw them at the back of his head and they landed. He held the back of his head but didn’t turn around as he left. I looked at Nixie. “ What did he mean by showing me something Alastor can’t?” Nixie just sighed heavily. “He was trying to have sex with you,” she responded in a blunt tone. She noticed the water dripping from her fingers and hastily wiped the water onto her work shirt to hide the evidence. 

“You almost lost your human disguise there,” I warned her. Nixie nodded slowly. “It’s harder than it looks to hold up a human disguise,” she retorted. “I have to focus on keeping this form and I just want to get back to Hell so I don’t have to wear a disguise for hours on end,” she muttered the last few words but I heard them. 

The pharmacist, who I’m sure hid during Nixie’s little spur with the guy who approached us, handed me my supplies. “Rubbing alcohol, bandaging and sports wrap, right here for you ma’am,” she passed the supplies to me. Nixie ate her last peach ring and threw away her wrapper. “What do you want me to carry?” She offered. I passed her the sports wrap. “Don’t get it wet or it won’t stick,” I told her. She nodded, tucking it under her arm. “Let’s get out of this pisshole,” Nixie suggested as she made her way to the exit of the supermarket.

Nixie’s POV

I took the quickest path out of the supermarket, rushing for fresh air. I had the sports wrap tucked under my arm just in case I began to lose my physical form again. Willow paced after me at a brisk speed, finally catching up to me. “That guy really got under your skin huh?” She mused. I rolled my good eye. “What bothered me was that he was trying to get you in bed with him; it’s perverse and nasty to pick up random girls when they’re alone or in a small group,” I ranted on for a moment, Willow nodding her head in agreement. 

“I wasn’t exactly comfortable with it either,” she agreed. “I was just wishing Alastor would form out of nowhere and handle him,” she admitted. I scoffed. “What, was I not your knight in shining armor? Am I not red enough?” I joked, giving her a snarky smile. Willow giggled; “no, you dispatched him just fine,” she replied. 

I grabbed a piece of chalk and passed it to Willow. “Get us out of here, I want to go back to the correct Hell-hole,” I told her. She got on her knees and drew a crude circle with the same symbols from earlier. Willow pricked her finger and dropped the blood onto the drawing and it opened a portal to Hell. She hopped down first and I followed her, happy to drop my human disguise. 

Alastor’s POV

I read a book while Andrew slept. His sleep was fitful, it sounded like he was having nightmares. I would have woken him up but I don’t know how to comfort a child after a nightmare. I am a nightmare. I looked up from my book here and there to make sure Andrew was comfortable. He occasionally mumbled incoherently, curling up under the blanket. 

I stood up from my chair and gently patted Andrew on the head. “There there, the nightmare is just that - a nightmare. The real world isn’t as bad as you think it is,” I tried to comfort him as he slept. As though he could hear my voice he relaxed a little, settling down in the bed. I sat down again and went back to my book. 

About two hours had passed when I heard the hotel door open. I didn’t hear Angel flaunting whoever he had sex with. I didn’t hear Charlie talking excitedly to Vaggie about hotel campaigns. In fact, I didn’t hear anything. Leaving the room and closing the door I walked to see who entered and froze in the spot. A demon, very similar to Andrew, stood in the foyer. 

“I want my son,” he demanded in a growl. I forced myself to not look in the direction of the clinic. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I lied. I knew he wanted Andrew. The demon approached me and grabbed me by the wrist. “Give me the boy or I’ll make sure you’re in the same condition he’s in,” he threatened. I snarled, grasping him by the throat. “No one who threatens the Radio Demon makes it out alive,” I threatened in return. I knew I could kill him with no effort. But I knew that Andrew, a 5 year old, still loved his father regardless of what he did to him. I didn’t want to hurt the boy. I threw the demon to the ground. “Leave this hotel or I’ll drag your soul through every circle of Hell,” I warned him. I really didn’t want to crush Andrew by killing his father but it seemed like I didn’t have much of a choice. 

The demon stared at me in uncertainty. Standing up he paced back a few feet. I already knew he was farcing an exit, and I was ready for him to rush at me. So when he did I summoned a tentacle, grabbing him by the arm. It pulled him down and he fought against it feebly. “The hell is this?!” The demon demanded. I snorted. “I warned you,” I taunted. Another tentacle grasped him by the throat, pulling him down to the ground. He writhed to get free but the tentacles only tightened. He was suffocating. For a split moment I worried about having to tell Andrew his father was dead but I couldn’t show this demon mercy. Not when he put out a hit on a child. The tentacle around his neck tightened until all he could make out were spitted nonsense. I watched with glee as he choked on his own vomit. His writhing had stopped, he had lost too much oxygen to move. He began twitching violently as his muscles restricted and begged for air. He jerked harshly for about 30 seconds before falling limp. I waited until I knew he was dead before I removed the tentacles. I approached his dead body and kicked him in the stomach. “Killing a child. No class,” I chastised him before turning around and entering the clinic. 

Andrew was wide awake, laying down, eyeing me with fear. “I heard my father. What did you do to him?” I didn’t want to go into detail about how I slowly killed his father. “He won’t be around to hurt you anymore,” I promised him. “Now get some more rest, the ladies will be back soon with the supplies they need for your wounds.” Andrew closed his eyes and steadied his breathing, swiftly falling asleep again. I sat down in my chair and returned to my book. 

Willow’s POV

Now that we were back in Hell I could carry all the supplies. Nixie gave me the sports wrap, surprisingly dry, and we headed back to the hotel. Nixie pulled out her phone and opened her GPS. “Alright, take two rights and a left and we’ll be there,” she instructed. I nodded my head in agreement. “I hope that kid’s okay, he’s been through so much,” I mused. Nixie hummed. “Alastor is watching over him. I don’t trust the guy with you but he would never hurt a child,” she assured me. I nodded my head in agreement. “Of course, he would never hurt a kid,” I reasoned with myself. It wasn’t him I was worried about. I was worried I couldn’t help the kid and I’d fail him, but I would never voice my insecurities to Nixie. She’d just go on a tangent about the patients I’ve helped and how capable I am of helping. Which is usually what I need to hear but right now, with a child’s life on the line, nothing could comfort me. 

Nixie and I followed the GPS, eventually arriving at the hotel. I fished out my key and opened the door, and gasped in horror. Lying on the floor of the foyer was a demon who looked eerily similar to the child I was caring for, dead on the ground. I approached the body to examine how he died. He had constriction marks on his throat and left wrist. He was suffocated to death. He hadn’t even begun to smell, this murder was recent. I knew who was capable of this - Alastor. Had the child’s father come back for him? I would never give up the kid to his father after what he’d been through but murder seemed excessive. Carrying my supplies I stepped over the body and entered the clinic. The kid was asleep and Alastor was reading a book. I cleared my throat and he glanced up, dog-earing the page he was on. I sat down my supplies as quietly as I could so as to not wake my patient and I beckoned him outside of the clinic. “Mind explaining the body in the foyer?” I inquired suspiciously. Alastor smiled ever so sweetly at me. “My dear, that was Andrew’s - the boy’s - father. He put a hit on his kid because he never wanted kids.  I simply gave him what he tried to give Andrew.”

I crossed one set of arms, propping my hand on my chin with the other set. “Well he’s certainly a piece of shit but how do you plan on explaining to Andrew that his father is dead?” I asked him. “Ho ho! I’ve already told him. He looked relieved.” Alastor never made a move to help someone in need unless it benefited him, but here he was killing a child’s father because his father simply never wanted kids. 

Nixie peered around the corner of the clinic. “I hate to interrupt your makeout session but we have a patient to attend to and I have a meeting in an hour. Could we get this show on the road?” I rolled my eyes at her crassness. “Of course, let’s take care of Andrew,” I agreed. 

I gently roused Andrew and told him to lay flat on the table on his back so I could see the stab wound. It had scabbed over by now but still needed to be cleaned. I split the skin open and Andrew whined. I motioned for Nixie to give me the rubbing alcohol and she passed it to me, looking away as I poured it into Andrew’s wound. He cried out in pain. “It burns!” He wailed. I waited for his sobbing to end. “It only burns because it’s cleaning the wound. It’ll be fully healed in about a week,” I told him. It still surprised me how fast sinners healed from their injuries. 

Afterward I requested the bandaging and Nixie handed it over to me, willing herself to watch me at work. I gently wrapped his abdomen and back in the bandaging to stop any bleeding and prevent the scab from tearing again. I waved for the sports wrap and Nixie approached me with it. She examined Andrew. “He looks like he’s been through literal hell,” she commented. Andrew laughed wryly. “You could say that,” he hissed through clenched teeth as I wrapped his shattered kneecap. “No walking for two weeks, we’ll take care of you here,” I told Andrew. He nodded, eyes closed in pain. 

Nixie’s POV

While Alastor and Willow were tending to Andrew I went back to the foyer, where the dead body lay. I knew Alastor was going to eat the corpse eventually but I didn't want him to get blood stains on the carpet again and drive Niffty into a flurry. Grabbing him under the arms I hauled him out of the hotel, kicking the door open behind me. I dragged the corpse to the back of the hotel, away from prying eyes. No one would see Alastor eat him. I knew his sense of smell was keen and he’d find the body with no issue. 

Entering the hotel again I changed into more casual clothes - a pair of yoga pants and an oversized t-shirt. I sat down at my computer and opened Zoom, preparing for my meeting. 

Thirty minutes passed and no one had joined the meeting so I clicked off. Clearly the meeting wasn’t being held today. I walked my way to the clinic to check on Andrew. He was fast asleep and Willow was tinkering with some bottles of mysterious fluid. When she noticed my arrival she gave me a hush signal. As quietly as I could, I slipped up behind her. “What are you doing?” I whispered. Willow hummed. “I’m trying to make fertilizer for more of Hell’s plants.” So essentially what she always did. I walked to the door, waving. “I’m gonna do my own thing, you have fun,” I whispered as I left. 

I noticed Husk was actually attending the bar for once and approached the bar, planning to only have one drink. I sat down on an empty stool and requested a sex on the beach. He lifted an eyebrow in doubt but said nothing as he prepared my drink. When he passed it to me I chugged it like a shot of vodka, it was gone before it melted the ice. I was already tipsy but I had a stressful day and dammit I deserve to unwind. “Give me a shot of whiskey,” I slurred. Husk shook his head in disappointment and passed me a shot of whiskey. It burned my throat and chest going down but I wasn’t about to pussy out. I drank the entire shot in three gulps. 

“I’m impressed. Not many demons can chug straight whiskey,” Husk complimented. I giggled, most definitely intoxicated. “Oh Husk, you’re so funny! You know my body waters down the alcohol so it isn’t as strong, silly.” I was hardly aware of myself when a hand patted me on the shoulder. I looked over to see Willow. “Nix, I think you’ve had enough. It’s time for you to go to bed,” she suggested, Alastor behind her nodding his head in agreement. I lifted a finger to her face; “you’re not my mom,” I slurred, but obeyed her, standing up to walk to my room. “Goodnight kitty!” I called out in a sloppy voice before retiring to my room. Alastor sighed. 

Willow’s POV

“So, when’s the wedding?” I teased Husk. He snorted. “Ask that again and I’ll find a way to make you drink toilet water,” he threatened. I just shrugged him off. “I’m going to bed too, wanna join me? You can read a book while I sleep,” I offered. Alastor nodded his head; “I’d love to,” he agreed. We ascended the stairs to Alastor’s room for the night. Changing into my nightgown I asked him, “are you going to eat that body?” Alastor chuckled darkly. “Let’s just say they won’t find the remains”. 

[7ndipity]

Hiiii! Happy New Year and congratulations on the 2K followers!! You totally deserve it, your writing is top tier ❤️ I hope the shipping game isn't over, but if it is, feel free to ignore! :)

I am a college student, and my sign is Cancer, and my personality is basically this: I am a smartass who owns it, clumsy af-always keeps breaking and losing stuff, has a teensy bit of leader instinct, pretty good at speeches, but at the same time I'm pretty childish, and people immediately assume I am very innocent due to my babyface™ when in fact I'm not lmao. I'm very good at using my cuteness to get my way, no one can resist me hehehe and I'd also call myself a pretty good singer! But I can get whiny and pouty when I don't get my way. I am a girlie girl who still loves pink lol! I love reading books so much that I forget the world around me when I start a book. I love music, especially singing. I can also be dramatic af. I am also hopelessly romantic, and want to be swept off my feet. I'm super optimistic, and try to look at the bright side. I can also be crazy and weird at times. Also can get ridiculously clingy - I'm a very lovely dovey person, I'll be randomly hugging and smooching my loved ones whenever I feel like it, and the sort of person to blurt out ily at the most random times. I love it when ppl remember a very teensy weeny detail about me and when they take the effort to try something just cause I recommended it. Especially if it's books and music. I have a very dumb sense of humour, and I tend to be unintentionally funny to people. I've also got a very short temper, and the moment my patience wears thin shit goes down and I turn into a screaming banshee lol.

Physically, I'm a shortie so I get teased very much about it and tho I've gotten used to it over the years it still bothers me. Also super insecure about my thicc thighs and big butt 😩 andddd I have a very tiny button nose which again was the butt of many jokes since school but I've learnt to embrace my cute nose! I do have a nice dimpled smile and that's the only physical feature about myself that I like. My eyes are kinda big too, not bambi-big, but still, pretty big. Again, like I mentioned, I have a babyface so people think I'm still in school 💀 and my high pitched voice doesn't help either.

In short, people describe me as a cute, smart and sunshiney person. I think that pretty much sums me up! Whoops that turned out longer than expected, sorry :(

Looking forward to your answer, and thank youuuu in advance! You're the best 🫰🏼

I would ship you with Jin, and maybe Tae! They're both classic romantics, and are quite physically affectionate, though in slightly different ways, and although they're quite stubborn and dramatic too, I think they would potentially match your energy.

I think Jin's into that classic girly girl vibe(he would also be into princess treatment), so he would find your style and energy quite attractive(Also, I firmly believe that he’s a thighs man, and I will die on that hill) Plus, he would love that you have a similar silly sense of humor, the man needs someone to laugh at his dad jokes!

Tae also has a love for softer, sweet styles, and he’s also has that cuter, baby-ish energy at times, but with that mischievous nature underneath, which means you'd both see right through your games, but you'd still go along with them anyways, lol!(Also Capricorns are supposed to be a good match for Cancers)

Hope this was alright💜

[molanobessivenerd]

my gender

This is gonna be a long rant abt my gender so you do have to read it. I just need to say it.

Ok so ive been question my gender/sexuality for like 3-4 years now and i this was kinda it

Oh i'm a bi girl -> im pan girl -> lesbian -> pan she/they still a girl but queerer

Then like i was more worried about trying to figure out my sexuality right cause like i wanted to be kissed before my 16th (that didn't happen) 

Then like maybe mid 2022 i started thinking about gender and i knew 2 trans people but i was kinda like no that can't be me flashforward to march 2023 i got in to will wood and i was like ‘no way i'm in anyway trans but if i could be him i would’ and i like said to myself that i just thought he was attractive?? Then the same thing happened with the character jesse st james from glee which was even weird because there was no way i would want to date him, so thats when she/they pronouns came in i put it in my bio. Then kids from my class found out and made fun of it so i changed em back to she/her. 

Then since like september last year it feels like minimum weekly i’d either not be able to stop thinking abt gender or take way too many ‘what's my gender quizzes’ 

And like i feel its alway been in the day of my head, but its becoming more prevalent since then ive been like could i be non binary, genderfluid pintrest boards. At the beginning of the year i cut my hair again, which felt so good,.

So now somedays im having thoughts like ‘oh my fucking god why cant i drink something and be a guy’ ‘please for fucks sake’ though im nor sure id like to be a man im not 100% sure im a girl (im moving further from that). But like if there was like a magical thing i could drink do idk that would turn every inch into like robert smith between 1983-2004 id do it so quickly omg. 

And like it kinda hurts that i'm not idk (and ive never felt this for any girl celebrities)

And i kinda think they are also there those thoughts but some days theyre less i thinks thats just cus im distracting myself though i dont know i could be fluid. 

But i dont want to be any guy like the men in my family most of them are big i cant think of a better word then buffheads more so my dad but i could just not want to be like them i dont have a good relationship 

I dont think i HATE being a girl- i don't love it i like some parts but i dont think its things exclusive to girls say cause gender norms n stuff. 

I dont know if i have dysphoria because that fluctuates but im vision impaired so if i dont try and look at my body i forget some of it exists i really dont like my boobs or how clothes sit on my body think i like okay with having a cups (that i could easly hide if i wanted to  i dont but that cause also be cause by the pain they cause me.

My waist i like but only because that's the part of my body thats skinnest like my body was less shapely but that skinny id be elated.

But especially o the days i think abt it more but also all the time i do wish for more masc features eg adams apple more angular face bigger hands etc etc.Voices of weird one because my voice is in mezzo soprano range my speaking voice however in chest voice is kinda low  but I was self-conscious about it growing up because it made me stand out in different even though really it wasn't I think I just thought people were staring at me for no reason.  I think I only like my voice when I'm singing when I'm acting because I can imagine myself playing characters who aren't me but idk but if it was lower like high baritone or tenor id be like so fucking happy.

And like i Kind of want to try dressing differently but I can't because a I don't want my family to know certain pieces of clothing would be mens Not that they have a problem with it I'm assuming they could though but they probably just want to talk about it and I would not but also like  I remember one time I was at the shop called Factorie  and I wanted to get the Black Parade t-shirt but it was a mens shirt  and my god the amount of anxiety I had and the amount of people that I felt were staring at me I almost had a panic attack. 

And like I feel like if I ever did do anything about gender irl  I'd run away from everyone I know and cut of connections again not because I feel like they'd be bad about it but just I've built this thing around myself so long and I don't think I could even my queer friends like i dont know  my parents I'd feel like I'd be letting them down, and like 

But also so much for my childhood makes sense

Like when I was about 8 I got eczema for the first time and my first thought was ‘oh im turning into a boy… shit what am I gonna tell my parents’  which I don't even know why my brain made that jump but i hated my boobs sometimes more then others Once they got past a certain size,  when I had a pixie cut and a couple people in the street would mistake me for a boy felt exposed ‘like shh don't tell’ 

But I was also such a girly todder/ child  from like ages four Tube8 I would pride myself on being the girlest girl never wearing pants  because I kind of think it was trying to win that competition but I don't know         

I don't think anybody read this whole thing but if you did help me out or don't I don't care but I just needed to vent this 

m

[cripple-culture-is]

i have a genuine question.

i'm very sure i'm physically disabled on some sort of level(?), and doing research, i have seen other disabled folk say that my experiences are valid. i have seen people say that unnamed/unknown/undiagnosed disabilities are still such, and should be included in the discussion. i know how limited i am in terms of all the things i can't really do, such as stay outside or even stand for very long, and i often get many headaches just for doing minor things like that. i'm also prone to chronic pain/illness, albeit quite mild, but i feel like any of it's not enough to earn me a voice. there's some sort of guilt i have when i want to claim a community label or discuss my experiences, as i wonder if i'm speaking over people who have it worse than me and definitely do know everything about themselves with the confidence to justify their place.

do you think someone like me belongs in disabled safe spaces? would i get harassed and booed out for using my privilege to fake and deceive my way in? am i not really disabled and/or should i seek a much lighter, open to questioning, unprioritized, etc. version of the wider community so that i can get what i need without intruding on those who need it more? i'm just afraid of offending people who are actually, clearly disabled. i assume it's possible for someone's life to be physically difficult to navigate due to complications without necessarily being classified as disabled. y'know?

Thank you so much for the question! I am very happy to answer it 😁

I'm going to preface this by saying there is no such thing as being "not disabled enough". There are disabled people with higher and lower support needs (I have low support needs, my wheelchair using relative has high support needs), but no one is inherently "not disabled enough".

People tend to think of disability as being linear. They see the disability spectrum as ranging from being "less disabled" to "more disabled". That's not true. Not everyone with the same condition will manifest the same way.

Not everyone with my medical condition is disabled. While I seem "less disabled" than my relative, I am still equally disabled under U.S. law.

There are always people who will have something worse than you. But the more you think about them, the more you begin to ignore your own struggles. It can fall into the realm of "toxic positivity". By thinking "Oh, I don't have it that bad, someone else has it worse", you kind of gaslight yourself into thinking you're completely fine when you're not.

I read actually a lot of internalized ableism in your comment. Happens to all of us. It honestly makes me cringe, but it's definitely not your fault.

From my own experiences, you belong here. People think that only visible disabilities are VALID disability. Those with "actual clear" disabilities. But most disabled people actually have invisible disabilities.

I am NOT visibly disabled. I don't use a wheelchair, cane, or any other type of mobility aid. I have an autoimmune disease that causes chronic pain, inflammation, and joint damage. I have been physically disabled my entire life.

Trust me when I say that you not being visibly physically disabled DOESN'T MEAN you aren't physically disabled.

July is Disability Pride Month, yes, it's the 31st, so the last day of July. But the point still stands. There's a banner on the Disability Pride Month pride flag for people like us. The white banner stands for invisible and undiagnosed disabilities. There is definitely a space here for you.

You aren't "faking" or "deceiving" your way into the disabled community. Will you be harassed? Maybe. There is some ableism within even the disability community. I've been harassed in real life for using things I have a legal right to, merely because I'm not "clearly disabled".

I can guarantee that if you saw me, you would just see a "standard", "normal", non-disabled 20 year old girl. 100%. I know because that's how most people see me. But I'm physically disabled under American law.

There is space for you here. You are welcome here. And I do not tolerate ableism of any kind on this blog, therefore, you're safe here, and your experiences are just as valid as any of the other physically disabled people here ❤️

Most non-disabled people don't run into barriers in society when it comes to what they can do physically. Chronic pain is ALWAYS considered a disability under U.S. law, and if (and hopefully when) you get a chronic illness/chronic pain diagnosis, you are automatically protected under the ADA. If you run into issues standing for long periods of time, you are likely disabled. I struggle with the same exact thing.

And I know most people DON'T struggle with that. Earlier this year, I saw 20+ people stand up for the entirety of a junior hockey game, including intermissions, and that was about 1 and a half to 2 hours long. I can only stand in one spot for about 2-5 minutes without my knees and feet hurting, to the point where I will always shift my weight from foot to foot when standing.

And I'm also going to be 100% honest with you. People will say "those who need it more". There actually AREN'T many accommodations for disabled people, and there's actually no shortage of accommodations for disabled people. They are just HIGHLY HIGHLY gatekept by the non-disabled government and withheld, sometimes even from those who need it.

You belong in this community, and you are welcome here ☺️

[mimiso-soup]

there's something so funny about people assuming my age versus my appearance growing up. for years as a kid, people thought i was one year older than i was due to me being on the taller side. that being said, however, how people have seen me for the past few years is hilarious

i'm slightly taller than my mom. there was a store in an outlet mall we've been to a couple of times and twice, one week and the next, we were asked if we were sisters (i swear, it was the same lady behind the cashier who asked us the same question)

my sister, who is 2 yrs younger, is often assumed to be my twin because we're basically the same height

and despite my height (i'm at least 5'6", which for the typical Asian woman, that's tall), many people have thought i was younger than 18

a couple days ago, was taking my mom's friend's 8 yr old daughter out shopping, who btw was very fun and energetic the entire time, thought i was 12 (this is funny and fine cause kids have no concept of age versus appearance). same day, however, a lady in the store asked if i was the girl's mom before probably seeing the surprise on my face and quickly asked if we were sisters

at least two years ago, my family doctor thought i was 12. i haven’t seen him in at least 4 years. that same year, my aunt invited me to her friend's kid's birthday, and an uncle thought i was 14-16

last year, because i was sitting in a very low table and somewhat hunched over, two women (who were 21+ yrs old and much shorter than me) mistaken me for 16 yrs old and thought i had gotten lost in the college we are all attending

it doesn't help that when i speak, my voice ranges from being somewhat low and lazy to more high and airy. one of my friends has said that on vc, sometimes their family thinks they're talking to a 12 yr old because of how child-like my voice is

[mamavanheat]

Evil Side

author's notes: first off i want to thank @arcaneblaine for introducing the idea of alt!josh into my brain, secondly @earthlysorrows for helping me write and edit. if you've never seen the movies mentioned, it might be confusing (i'm sorry!!). the playlists are from josh's pov. this is the longest fic i’ve ever written and i hope there’s not too many mistakes 😭😭

enjoy, besties

word count: 7.3K

WARNINGS: 18+ MINORS DNI, alcohol consumption, smoking, blood, SMUT, consensual non-consent (kinda?), unprotected sex, physical assult, ANGST, cursing, asshole!josh, let me know if i forgot any please!!

The music blasting through the speakers in the venue made it just a little bit harder for the server to hear your order. It's quite the busy weekend considering the weather was not favorable for most. The rain tends to drive people to stay home and cozy. However, you loved the rain. It was the perfect time for you to enjoy yourself in a not so wild environment. So, the amount of people that were crammed into the building tonight was a little overwhelming. "Hey! Can I please just get a Yuengling? Tap if you have it!" The server nodded at your order and turned to walk away. Your favorite table was always the one in the corner by the front door in case you end up leaving suddenly. Feeling invisible wasn’t your favorite thing, but it was comfortable.  

The server returned with your drink, setting it down with a small black cocktail napkin. You thanked her and twisted the salt shaker from the table, sprinkling pieces onto the thin coaster. A local band, some guys you’ve vaguely heard of, was set to play live in less than a half hour. You sat patiently scrolling on your phone while you waited for them to take stage. The owner of the bar had asked you a couple months ago to manage their social media page since you frequented every weekend. They were older and could barely figure out Instagram so taking on the task was no issue. However, you didn’t happen to be the best photographer around, just someone with basic photo editing skills and a great phone camera. Before the set starts, you people watch to find the next subject of a hopefully viral post for the sake of making the owners proud.  

The next band, assumably the local band that had been hyped up for a couple weeks, began to take their rightful places on the small stage. Four guys around your age grabbed their instruments as you stood to find a better spot for your pictures. One of them in particular caught your eye, the singer. He stepped onto the stage with great confidence and a smugness to him.  “Thank you guys for coming to see us tonight. I’m Josh and we’re Greta Van Fleet.” His hands gripped the mic as he nodded to the guitarist, signaling the beginning of the song. This band had to be the hardest for you to capture still photographs of as they all moved across the stage continuously, especially the singer. It was a miracle his low-rise skin tight pants managed to stay on the entire time. His voice definitely did not fit the body, taking you by surprise at the notes he hit. High and low. It was intriguing to say the least.  

The small audience space filled with screaming fan girls was not a shock as you watched the entire set. They had a charm and stage presence that draws you in to them. Josh interacted with them quite often causing them to absolutely lose their minds. As you tried to move your way through the crowd for a better chance at a shot stable enough to post, attention was drawn to you by the fans shoving back. Josh noticed you. His eyes lingered as he belted into the mic, not missing a single note. You became his target. He gave you the show you were looking for as he removed the mic from the stand and crouched on the stage directly before you. Looking directly into your camera as the words flowed from his lips. Once he hit a very exaggerated part, his head fell back as his eyes rolled behind his eyelids. Tongue exposed in his fully open mouth. The whole thing just seemed... orgasmic for him.  

The show came to an end and the floor became a hyped circle of chaos as everyone made their way from the stage. Some taking a seat and ordering drinks, some walking out toward the street and heading on their way. You take your original seat and start to scroll through the now project of narrowing down the good and the bad results of your attempt to capture the wild ride that just unfolded. A light tap of a finger on your shoulder made you jump as your focus flew from your screen. Josh was standing in front of you, a cigarette in his smile as he acknowledged your phone in your hand. He pulled the cigarette from his mouth with his index and middle finger, pointing it the screen. “D’ya get some good stuff?” You look back down to your phone and find a couple shots to show him. “They’re not the best, but I’m no expert. Just helping the owners with their social media a bit.”  

He takes the seat beside you at the table and grabs your phone, scrolling through the pictures for himself. The waitress from earlier approached the table again asking if you’d like another drink. Josh keeps his eyes on your phone as he orders some obscure drink and you order yourself another beer. “Huh, I like this one.” He turns the screen toward you to reveal a very provocative mirror selfie you’d recently taken in secret. A couple nights ago you'd gotten just a little wine drunk, or maybe a lot wine drunk, and threw on a hot outfit you’d been saving for your next rendezvous. The fishnets hugged your thighs, the tiny skirt sat on your hips revealing a little bit of your ass cheeks underneath, a very very small bra held your chest up, and your face... well you had been feeling yourself so your eyes read a very scandalous expression as your finger was held between your lips. You had definitely forgotten about it until this very moment.   

Your mouth hung open as you realized what was happening. Embarrassment filled your mind as you tried to come up with an excuse for it. But there was no excuse, you just felt hot as fuck. The fact that he even said anything sure was ballsy. And you liked it. “What’s your favorite film?” Josh’s eyes looked at you as if he was trying to test willingness to play along to a little game. He was trying to distract you now. He’s in control of this interaction and making it clear. Quietly you mumbled, “10 Things I Hate About You.” It feels like a trick to test his pretentiousness, but in all honesty, it was one of your top movies. He’d never know that truthfully though. “You’re fucking kidding me.” You can’t help but bust out laughing at his response. Not exactly what you expected but nonetheless, he did fall for your backfire to his game. “Nothing thought provoking?” You were ashamed to keep entertaining him but the fact that this specific man was giving you attention felt really good. “Fine, Donnie Darko.” Nodding his head with a fake impressed expression, he replies, “Okay, okay. Interesting.”  

You huffed at him with a look of disbelief. “What? Are you, like, reading me or something?” His eyebrows flew up his face at your attitude. He likes it.  “Actually, yes. You can learn a lot from someone’s favorite fantasy world. Who’s your favorite character?” You hesitate for a couple seconds before replying, “Honestly... Frank. He’s everywhere but not an actual physical being. Mysterious, in a kinda hot way. I feel like we’d get along. He could haunt me every day for the rest of my life and I'd never be scared. He’s... comforting? I dunno, I’m just rambling now.” A nervous giggle sneaks through your lips as you feel a hot blush falling across your cheeks.  

“Okay, Josh. What’s your favorite movie?” Without needing a second to think he replies, “The Shining. Really fucks with your head but it’s not real either. Seems we have something in common on that part.” The only thing in common if feels. A cunning smirk crept from his lips, immediately drawing your eyes in. He takes notice and swipes his tongue across his bottom lip and pulling it in for a light bite. At that point you don’t know how long you’ve been thirsting over his lips but you heart heavily beating through your chest pulled you back to reality. 

“So, I know you really don’t have that much experience in photography but I was thinking,” He seems to be genuine when asking the favor, “would you want to come take some pictures for our new album promotion? I kinda actually like the... rawness of your editing.” Now that actually felt like an insult, but you tell yourself he really didn’t mean it like that. “Give me your number, Frankie.” This name caught you by surprise. “Frankie?” He ignores the question and reaches his phone to you with the name already written into the contact. You typed your information in before handing it back to him. “Perfect! See ya soon, Frankie.” An effortless wink was your goodbye before he turned with his drink in hand to join his band mates at the bar.  

______________________________________________________________

Frankie’s Fishnets  

"Evil Side" - The Dirty Nil  

"Closer" - Nine Inch Nails  

“Tear You Apart” - She Wants Revenge 

"Want You Bad" - The Offspring  

"Animal" - Against Me! 

“MakeDamnSure” - Taking Back Sunday 

______________________________________________________________

That whole night and the couple following days were filled with thoughts of this man. He was so intimidating but calm about everything. It was hard to read him but you’d take your chances and trust him. After the picture fiasco, you weren’t quite sure what kind of relationship this was at this point. Josh had texted you earlier today about starting the shoot. You agreed and tried to set up a makeshift studio out of things you just had laying around. Your apartment was filled with whacky furniture and antique trinkets so it wasn’t hard to come up with the perfect space.  

“Here’s Joshy!” A loud enthusiastic voice announces his entrance as he walks into your front door after throwing it completely open. “Where’s the other guys?” Josh shrugs and heads directly to your fridge, scrounging around for something to drink. “They, uh, had other plans come up.” He pulls a beer from the shelf and cracks it open. A couple gulps and a sigh to follow fills the quiet air.  “Okay, so it’s just us?” He throws the beer back again before assuring, “Yep, just me and you. Alone.” Something about those words tells you he had a different idea in mind for your session tonight. “How am I supposed to get the whole band in the pictures if they’re not here?” He finishes the last couple drops of the beer and smashing the can in his hand. Your eyes stayed glued to the veins in his hand as he gripped the crushed aluminum. “Edit them in or something. I had another idea anyway. Interested?” Your eyebrows furrow to him in confusion.  

“Where’s your bathroom?” Nodding the direction to him, your mind instantly goes to horny thoughts you’d had over the days he stayed spiraling in and out of your mind. You fought with yourself over what kind of lover he’d be. Was he the type that always wanted to be in charge? But then maybe he was the one to switch roles. He liked it when you snapped his attitude back to him.  Maybe he likes to be told what to do every now and then. Either way, he just seemed like a tease. “Frankie!” Your new name was being called not from the bathroom, but from your bedroom at the end of the hall.  

You walk in to see Josh rummaging through your closet. You make your way to him fast and smoothly slide between him and the door. “What do you think you’re doing?!” He moves back from you and answers, “Well, I was looking for something for you to wear. It’s part of the new project.” Standing in complete shock with your hands still spread across the doorway, you can’t help but scoff, “What’s the project?” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small bottle of a red thick liquid. Before you could even ask another question, he pulls his shirt above his head and tosses it to the side of the room. He snaps open the bottle and begins pouring its contents over his tattoo covered skin. It drips around the gold chain resting against his collar bones. The shock on your face couldn’t be hidden while he holds the bottle out to you, “Kinda like spray it on the wall behind me so it looks like I just slashed someone to death.”  

“Josh, what the fuck is that?!” A laugh bellows from his chest as he swipes a finger across his chest gathering the glistening drops then sliding the finger into his mouth. “Relax, Frankie. Corn syrup and food dye. Like blood in the movies.” He grabs your hand and pours a couple droplets from the bottle onto your finger before bringing it to your mouth. His eyes catch yours and don’t let go as you pulled your lips apart slightly for him to give you a taste. It was sweet and sticky just like you imagined. “I already found it by the way.” He said as he let go of your wrist. Your eyebrows are again showing your confusion. “Found what?” He looks over your shoulder and tilts his head toward your bed. The outfit you had on in the picture he saw the night at the venue was laying neatly atop your bedding.  

“Listen, the idea is we’re a blood thirsty fucked up couple. We get off on the kill.” You couldn’t take your eyes off the very small amount of cloth laying in front of you. Outside you tried to make yourself seem offended that he would even assume you’d play a part in this. Inside, you know better. Your head was spinning with excitement. “And you want me to be a part of this? What does this have to do with your band?” His eyes studied you up and down. You felt like an innocent prey staring into the eyes of the predator. “This is for, uh, my personal works. Nothing to do with the band. Just art.” Just art. You repeated it in your head thinking it over.  

“Put it on.” He walked to the bed and held the outfit out to you still on the hanger. “Fuck off, Josh. I’m not going to model half naked for you.” That was a lie and you knew it. In fact, you had already day dreamed about it... multiple times.  “I said put it on, Y/N.” This time his voice wasn’t playful, he was demanding. He wasn’t using your nickname anymore. He left the room then you heard the front door open and close. You weren’t sure how long until he’d be back, if he was coming back, but this was something you wanted. All those day dreams and questions you’d asked yourself are minutes away from being answered. You slipped out of your clothes, laying them neatly on the bed to replace the outfit Josh had handed to you. Your reflection in the mirror this time didn’t look like you. A sinister woman was staring back.  

The top was barely tied to your chest when he returned, a camera and tripod in hand. He didn’t react to your pretty much naked body in front of him. This did make you a little insecure, so naturally you pulled some of your hair over your shoulder to hide at least a little bit. “I brought this so it’d be a little easier to use with both of us as the subjects. I’m gonna set a timer on it and it’s really just going to be easier to film and take stills from the video for editing.” You nod at him like you had any understanding what he was talking about. Really the only thing you could focus on was his hands wrapped around the camera while he changed the settings. The way his fingers flex with every button he pushed.  

“Let’s do this.” He slapped his hands together before walking toward the direction the camera pointed. For the first time since he walked into the room, he looked at you. Nodding to himself in approval with an evil grin. “I’m going to do a couple with just myself and then you can jump in when you’re ready, okay?” You return the nod to him in agreement. Something about him changed before your eyes. He became a character, somebody else. It was fascinating watching his posing and behaviors like you weren’t even there. It made sense why his favorite movie was about a man with some kind of separate personality. You weren’t in the room anymore, just him and whoever he was pretending to be. He was so good at it, you felt yourself trying to cower down and hide. Suddenly as you started to move back farther from him, his eyes fell your direction. Pupils fully dilated.  

He steps closer to you while admiring all of you again. His eyes this time told you he would devour you in a second if you just gave him the word. “Josh... we’re supposed to be working.” A hand fell onto your exposed waist, the other brushed your hair behind your shoulder. A little sting sends a chill down your body as his teeth took a soft bite of the flesh he just cleared for himself. His lips brushed across your neck before stopping at your ear lobe.  “All work and no play makes Josh a dull boy.” Your head fell backward while his nose pressed into your neck as he laid kiss after kiss on your skin. You couldn’t help but focus on the cold sensation of his septum ring against your hot skin. His hands snaked their way down your back to each grab a handful of your ass pulling you closer to him.  

His chest pressed against yours smothering you in the fake blood he’d poured onto himself. It was definitely making a mess that was going to be hard to clean. “Tell me what you want.” His voice between lips meeting against your skin just feels so right. You purr to him involuntarily as your worrying mind is no longer in the pilot’s seat. You didn’t even realize one of his hands had left their place to grip into your hair and pull back, eyes shooting open to see into his. “Tell me what you want.” He repeats himself again through clenched teeth. You smirk at him mockingly while looking through your eyelashes devilishly challenging him. He slips his fingers into the holes of your fishnet tights and rips them open, causing you to jump at the unwarranted action. “You really don’t listen, do you? That’s gonna get you into some trouble.”  

The hand holding onto your hair let go before he grabbed the strings of your top, releasing your breasts from the fabric as it fell between your bodies. His eyes glanced down to them while he pushed you back to the bed and sitting you down. “Give me your hands.” You held your arms out to him while he wrapped the strings around your wrists, tying them tight. The movements of his hands were ingrained into your memory. He stood at the edge of the bed and undid his pants, pulling himself free. Another image stored into your brain. “You look like an angel covered in that blood, Y/N. Too good for me.” He was teasing you but it was turning you on. You didn’t want to wait for his next instructions so you wrapped your bound hands around it and started rubbing it slowly, looking up to him for approval. He grabs your jaw and pulls your mouth closer. “Open.” You do as he says and open your lips, sliding your tongue out to him. You expected him to slide his cock in but instead he bends over you, looking directly into your eyes, and spits right into your mouth.  

“On your knees, ass up.” You did as he told while guided himself to the entrance between your legs. Sliding in just a little bit in and pulling completely out, forced a moan of frustration from your throat. “Now, tell me what you want.” You can’t ignore his demand this time. You were completely under him and willing to obey his every command. “I want you to...” He pushed himself a little more this time. “Fuck... I want you to destroy me.” It came out as a whisper but he heard you clear. Exactly what he wanted to hear. He went all the way in this time, making your mouth fly open and eyes squeeze shut. Your body adjusted to him the first couple of thrusts before he told you, “I love to see your ass bouncing against my cock, fuck!” He smacked his hand across it before grabbing your hips to pound himself deeper into you. 

 Your head flew back from the force every time his hips hit against your backside. You can’t manage to hide your moans anymore as they turned more into screams of satisfaction. His hand ran up your back pushing you further into the mattress until it snaked around your throat. He gripped tightly using it to pull you back against his chest. Hot breath hit against your neck as he dug his teeth into your shoulder. He was destroying your pussy and your mind. There’s no way you’d ever forget this man. He awakened something inside of you. The way he tightened and loosened his hold on your throat had you dizzy. Your body was filling with heat and ready to burst with him deep inside of you. That fucking sweet spot he hit over and over again was driving you to the release you needed. “God damn, Y/N. You’re fucking shaking with my cock buried in that soaking wet pussy.” His voice was quivering as he spoke in your ear. He was folding into you just as much as you were into him. Your hands still tied together fell between your thighs, massaging your clit to match his movement.  

You reached the point you couldn’t take anymore. Your eyes rolled back as your body stiffened. Everything around you was dissolving. A warm wet liquid coated both of your legs… and his. “Fuck yes.” He growled at you. Your pussy clenched around his cock over and over until he let you go to fall forward on the bed. He held himself over your ass and pumped until his cum was coating your back. A string of moans fell from his mouth while he finished draining himself. You lay on your stomach twitching in ecstasy as he laid onto his back next to you.  

“I’ve never done that before.” You admitted softly to him, moving your face from his direction. “It was so fucking hot, Frankie. You don’t even know.” He laughed off your embarrassment, pushing his hair back from his sweat and fake blood covered face. “Josh... Why me?” He was quiet for a couple minutes before letting out a heavy sigh, “Dunno. Something told me you’d be fun to play with.” He rolled to the side of the bed and stood to walk out of the room. The sound of the shower knob squeaking on let you know his time with you tonight was done. Time to wash the sheets.  

______________________________________________________________

Fear |—| Love 

"I Believe in a Thing Called Love" - The Darkness  

"Girl All the Bad Guys Want" - Bowling For Soup 

“Possum Kingdom” - Toadies 

“Hands Down” - Dashboard Confessional 

“Last Of The American Girls” - Green Day 

“Everlong” - Foo Fighters 

______________________________________________________________

The following weeks after the first hook up consisted of meet ups for pleasure and pain. It was hard to tell yourself to not catch feelings when he made you feel this way. He made you feel wanted but not at the same time. He was addicting. It was confusing but you were trapped under his spell. Every time he looked into your eyes with his dark caramel gaze you melted into him over and over again. You had memorized every tattoo he had and could trace them with your eyes closed. You knew everything that makes him tick and everything he dreamed of having. Well, sexually that is. He refused to open up to you, but his eyes always told you the truth even if his lips always lied.  

At first it did start out as some kind of kinky sex. Something he fantasized and wanted to play out. Over time it felt like he considered your needs more. He still played out his ideas but also started asking you what you wanted instead of only demands. ‘No kissing. No cuddling. No staying the night.’ Those were the rules. It was confusing in the beginning but that’s what he wanted. And you wanted him.  

Somehow between all the action, you’d managed to squeeze in time to actually get photos of the band all together. Josh had shown you some tricks to get the look he wanted for the promotional flyers. It wasn’t as hard as you thought it’d be but he always made it seem so easy. Everything was easy for him. When the other guys were around, you were just a fellow photographer. When it was just the two of you, you were his in every sense. Easy for him to pretend even if it wasn’t for you.  

Sometimes you couldn’t help yourself trying to keep his attention when his friends were around. You would stand as close to him as you could without him pushing you away, grazing the back of your hand across his when you walked next to him, catching his eyes for a second too long before he would look away. Today was the day to show them the final prints and edits. You spread them across the table as they looked through and commented on how much they loved them. Josh sent you a wink as you smiled proudly to him beside you.  

You wrapped your arm around his waist and pulled him to you for kiss on his cheek. “What do you think you’re doing?” His response sent your whole body stiff with confusion. “I- I thought you wanted me to.” He pulled you to the side of the room and looked back and forth between your eyes before whispering so nobody else could hear, “Look, I don’t know what you think this is, but it’s not it. We’re not a thing. I was just having fun.” There it was. Everything you felt was going on but denied yourself because it’s not what you wanted. “I don’t understand.” His eyes looked sad but yet he stood his ground. “I think you should leave. Now.” The other people in the room had caught onto the scene and awkwardly stood around the table. A fire of rage started to fill your body as you finally caught onto his game. This was the plan the whole time. He just wanted to use and dump you when he won.  

“What about the pictures? You don’t want them?” You throw the prints at him sending them flying around the room. “I don’t need your fucking help, Frankie. I’m used to handling things on my own.” he growled at you. He turned away leaving you to talk to the back of his head, his attention was no longer going to be for you. “Don’t fucking call me that, you fucking asshole!” Thumping in your chest took over your body the more you thought about it. Stomach in a tight knot as your mouth watered with sickness. Eyes filling with flooded waters waiting for the dam to break and set them free. Lungs heavy and collapsing with every releasing breath. Your heart ached. That was it. You were done.  

______________________________________________________________ 

SUCK A FUCK 

“Self Esteem” - The Offspring 

“Your Sword Versus My Dagger” - Silverstein 

“Change” - Deftones 

“Buried Myself Alive” - The Used 

“Inside Out” - Eve 6 

“You’re Cute When You Scream” - Senses Fail 

______________________________________________________________ 

A couple weeks had passed and there was an event your venue was holding at an employee’s house. You pulled up to the party not knowing exactly how to feel. In a way, it was good to get out and enjoy your friends again, but part of you just missed the rush he gave you. You didn’t know if he’d be here but the chances were high considering he’s now included into the local music scene. He can just walk around and live his normal life socializing and doing all the things he wants without a second thought. No regrets according to him. How was it so easy for him? So easy to just pretend like nothing happened. Like you didn’t mean anything to him. As much as you wanted to believe it wasn’t true, the reality of your different lives proves itself.  

The house was filled with conversation and loud music from the speakers. You made your way to the table with all the liquor set out and pour yourself a hefty glass of vodka, soda, and a few limes. After a couple gulps of the strong mix, you made a path around through the groups of people standing around. Once you got to the middle of the party, you heard a familiar voice followed by loud laughter. Your head whipped in his direction to see him surrounded by some music industry people and friends. It hurt to see how happy he was, or pretending to be.  

The liquor was starting to hit when you realized you had no idea how much time passed with you watching him. You needed a distraction and found your way to the area with people dancing around. There was a man there you thought you’d have no chance with. However, Josh had given you the courage you lacked in the past. You walked to him smiling before turning your back into him and grinding. His hand fell at your hip and your free hand found the back of his head, pulling him into you. The room was spinning as you downed the rest of your drink and stumbled around with the new man. You closed your eyes and leaned back into him before he spun you to face him. His lips were now pressed on yours, aggressively moving around them. “No thank you.” Your hands pushed against his chest to pull away but he wasn’t taking the hint.   

You tried to walk away but a hand on your wrist pulled you back to him. “C’mon, babe. You came to me.” His breath against your ear didn’t feel the same as Josh’s. He didn’t make you melt. He didn’t give you goosebumps from excitement. He was just some man. You shook your head at him as you stumbled away the second time. “Fuck you, cunt!” The only response you could give in your current drunken state was to look him in the eye and flip him the bird. “Don’t fucking talk to her like that!” No way. No way that was the voice of the man that ran through your head every single day. You faced the direction it was coming from to see Josh coming in inches from the man’s face. “Oh yeah? What are you gonna do about it?” Not even a second could go by after he finished the question before Josh’s fist was planted into the nose of his challenger. He fell to the floor and held his face as blood began pouring from the wound.  

Josh turned and rushed toward you, reaching his arm over your shoulder to guide you out the front door. “Oh, now you want to show me affection in front of people? I bet you’re so turned on by the blood, huh?” Your words were barely coherent when he opened his passenger door to his car and basically laid you into the seat. He walked to the driver side and slammed his door shut, jamming the keys into the ignition. “Where are you taking me, Joshy? Taking me to use and toss to the side? Hidden away for when you need a quick nut?” You were spitting your insults to his face but he remained unphased, other than his jaw clenching shut to keep whatever he had to say behind his teeth.  

By the time he pulled into your drive way, you’d long been passed out. You were in and out of conscience while he picked you up from the seat and carried you to the front door. He reached in your bag, pulling out the bundle of keys, and fumbled around the find the right one. As soon as it was open, he headed straight for your bedroom and laid you on the mattress. Your shoes were tossed on the floor before he pulled back your comforter and tucked you underneath. His hand brushed your hair softly from your face before he disappeared.  

______________________________________________________________

when the world will end 

“The Reason” - Hoobastank 

“Have Faith In Me” - A Day to Remember 

“I Miss You�� - blink-182 

“Iris” - The Goo Goo Dolls 

“How’s It Going to Be” - Third Eye Blind 

______________________________________________________________

Your head was pounded when you woke up. The rain falling against your window was unbearably loud and made you extremely nauseated. But not as nauseated as you felt sitting in the bottom of your shower, attempting to wash off the bad night, and remembering Josh coming to your rescue. You don’t remember all of it, in fact you only remember a few things. The guy, the blood, and you screaming in Josh’s face. Next thing you knew, you woke up in your bed feeling like your head and heart were going to explode out of your body.  

You picked up your phone and dialed his number expecting it to go straight to voicemail. The ringing stopped and before he could answer you asked him, “Why did you save me?” He sighed heavily into the phone. “Just because I’m the bad guy to you doesn’t mean I am a bad guy.” That was an answer you weren’t expecting. A long silence followed before another reply from him, “That guy isn't good for you. Shit Y/N, even I would be better for you and I’m the bad guy here.” You finally tried to move on and it failed. He was right, to you he was the bad guy. But you felt he wasn’t being completely honest with his feelings either. ‘I would be better for you’? What does he even mean by that? He’s the one that left you crushed and putting yourself back together with no answers.  

“Josh, he was just some random guy at a party. We weren’t there together.” Another long silence. You looked at your phone to make sure he was still on the call to see the timer still going. Minutes passed before he said anything. “Can I come see you?” You hesitated an answer but you wanted to hear what he had to say. Maybe he could explain what happened in detail for him to act like that. Or maybe he was just going to manipulate his way back into your life. At this point, who knows what goes on in that man’s mind? You surely didn’t.  

Most of the anxious thoughts in your mind were probably from the little bit of hangover left, but you did feel sick at the thought of seeing him face to face again. Before he’d gotten there you made yourself some food you probably wouldn’t keep down, taken more ibuprofen than you should have, and down as much water you could manage. The longer you waited, the sadder you felt. It was lonely sitting there in your thoughts. Hours passed until you heard a light knock on the front door. You stood there knowing he was on the other side but not knowing the outcome. A deep breath and you opened the door. He didn’t give you a chance to say anything before he started explaining everything.  

“All of this time I had myself convinced it was just me. I was supposed to be there for myself and never rely on anybody else. Nobody to help me see the small things around me and appreciate them, or make me think about how the way I act really affects the people I care about. I always said it’s not my problem how they react, that’s their problem. But that’s not true Y/N. You made me realize all of these things. I hurt you. I really hurt you. And I don’t know if I can forgive myself for that. You made me scared. I started having feelings that I couldn’t believe were real until I met you.” Seeing him standing in front of you was hard. You made yourself look into his eyes as tears finally started streaming from yours. They were empathetic and polite. Something you’d never seen from him before. He says he was scared of you but you felt he was the one to be scared of. As much as you wanted to hate him, you couldn’t. He just keeps you wrapped around his finger no matter how much you tried to let it go.  

He starts to take a step toward you but you flinch backwards. “Fuck!” He yells grabbing his head in frustration. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. I just- I'm gonna go.” As much as you hated how he treated you, you knew it wasn’t really how he felt. Everything he just admitted to you was real. You felt it. You just needed him to say it himself. Without realizing the rain had started again, you started running after him barefoot through the wet mud and grass of the yard. He heard you coming after him and caught you in his arms. Your head fell against his shoulder and your legs wrapped around his waist. “Frankie, I’m so sorry I hurt you.” he mumbled into your shoulder. His arms held you tight as the rain fell harder. You didn’t care.  

______________________________________________________________

That was a compliment. 

“Fade Into You” - Mazzy Star 

“Tonight, Tonight” - The Smashing Pumpkins 

“Slide” - The Goo Goo Dolls 

“Got You (Where I Want You) - The Flies 

“Just Like Heaven” - The Cure 

______________________________________________________________

He had ended up carrying you through the front door again, this time you would remember the whole thing. Soaked clothes and skin sticking together as he let you down back onto your feet. He pushed the wet strands of hair from your cheek before sliding his hands around your jaw. You finally felt his kiss. Soft lips giving you the words he wasn’t able to speak. Everything he’d held back the entire time. He was scared you were the one going to leave, this time he wasn’t letting go. His mouth followed yours as you pulled back only to relieve yourself of your dripping wet shirt. It hit the floor with a splat when it fell from your fingertips. He watched closely as you reached for the hem of his to follow the same actions. You hadn’t bothered to put on a bra, as this whole interaction wasn’t expected for today’s agenda.  

You reached your hand for his. He smiled grabbing it softly and following you to your familiar bedroom. Your hands untied your pajama pants and slid them down your legs, tossing them to the side with a kick of your foot. “You’re so beautiful.” He took in your whole figure, appreciating every small detail. Every freckle and scar. Every crease and dip. It was hard to not smile at his admiration. You knelt down before him onto your knees and unbuttoned his pants, sliding them down his legs until he stepped out of them. You wrapped your hands around his dick and kissed the head softy. The way he looked at you was not the same. His eyes were soft and kind, full of love.  

You stood and led him to the bed, pushing him lightly to lay down. He slid back against the pillows and watched as you crawled to join him, throwing a leg over his side and straddling him. His hands fell onto your hips while you situated yourself. You cupped your hands around his face, leaning in to kiss him again. His fingertips laced up your back while he pulled you into him. Tasting him was now your favorite sensation. Every move he made was delicate and light. No rush to get things finished. He moved down to your nipple, licking a couple times before sucking it between his lips. His tongue swiped it causing your clit to start throbbing at the feeling. You hum to him, “That feels so good, Joshy.” He curls his lips into a small smile at the praise.  

His hand slips down your thigh and back up to your hip before moving down to your core. He swipes his thumb over your very sensitive clit while looking up to you for a reaction, mouth still latched onto your breast. Your hands wrap around his head holding him closer to your chest as he massages you. Warm fuzzy feelings rush through your veins as your first orgasm comes. You squeeze your eyes shut as your head falls back in pleasure, letting small gasps escape your lungs. Your hips rutted craving him inside. He lets your nipple free with a pop and reaches between the two of you, centering himself below you. You lean forward resting your forehead against his and staring into his eyes again. Sliding down inch by inch adjusting to him slowly. He places his hands on your ass helping you find your pace, grinding yourself down onto him.  

You find your lips back on his, tongue swiping them open and inviting him inside. Your hips start moving fast chasing the high you were so close to finding. Moans filled the air with the sound of the rain against the window. Nothing else mattered anymore. You and him were together and it was everything you thought it would be. He was finally inviting you into the real him, not just the act he put on to protect himself from the rest of the world. He was soft, caring, and considerate. Even if the ride was wild, the result was worth it in the end. You could see it.  

The feeling was building up inside of you again. The waves of electricity flowed through your body once more. “Look at me.” He could feel you pulsing around him as his own orgasm began to follow yours. You open your eyes to gaze into his, eyebrows furrowed in pleasure. “Please come for me, Y/N.” Shaking and grabbing onto his arms, you finished for the second time. He let go after you staring into your soul, it felt. Your body relaxed onto him as he held you tight. “I love you, Frankie.” he whispered to you. The words caught you by surprise as you tried to catch your breath, heart beating hard in your chest. You were scared to say it back but it felt so natural, no more thinking needed. “I love you, too.” Both of you stayed that way for a bit. Taking everything in, raw emotions hanging in the room. You didn’t need to say anything. He put a hand on your shoulder and push back, then sliding your hair from your face. “We should probably take a shower now, huh?” You nodded to him with a smile. 

[somevirtualnolife]

Three Things

1539 words

Also on Ao3

Rating: G

Series: Tokimeki Memorial: Girls Side 2nd Kiss

Pairing: Daisy (OC) x Saeki Teru

Summary: Saeki Teru goes to a baseball game to support Mizuki's cheerleading, but it looks like he isn't the only one who notices her.

Author’s Note: I'm somewhat back! It took me a while to figure out what I originally wanted to do with the part since I wanted it to be from Saeki's point of view. The ending of course, is a bit of a cliffhanger, but that just means I have to write more, eh?

While I do joke that I like to bully him, it was more that I wanted to show off the feeling of when in the game where Daisy's stats are getting really high and all the boys start to notice you and want to take you out on dates. And of course, the moments when Daisy is walking home from a date with one boy, but then another boy spots them.

I hope you all enjoy it!

“I don’t see why you had to drag us along,” Harry huffed as he crossed his arms, his eyebrows furrowing in annoyance. “Just because you want to see your girlfriend shaking her pompoms in a miniski-OW,���

“Sorry, my elbow slipped,” Saeki Teru flashed an apologetic smile on his face. “Also, we’re just friends,”

It was true, Mizuki and Saeki had already established they weren’t in a relationship. Not… technically. Obviously, he liked her, and they hung out a bunch, but to be a couple, that would complicate things. There were just… a lot of other things going on in his personal life, about his parents and Sangosho. He’s still been having difficulties having them see just how important it was to keep working at the café. They were just…

Close.

“Seems like couple behavior to me,” Harry mumbled, rubbing his stomach.

“I have to side with Saeki-kun actually,” a bi-speckled Itaru spoke up.  “I am assuming that neither Saeki-san nor Shirogawa-san have formally agreed that they are going steady, then they are technically not a couple, even if you have gone on a few dates. There’s something freeing about that, don’t you think?”

“Going steady? Are you from the 1950s or somethin’?” the musician continued to complain.

“But doesn’t that work in your favor, Hariya?” Itaru pushed his glasses up slightly, a slight smirk on his face. “Considering Nishimoto-san and Meiko-san…”

“WHOA-HEY! That’s different!!”

“Can we please move on from this topic? I just want to watch the game,” Saeki tried not to lose his cool with the two. There were way too many other students around for him to be too snarky.

He had to admit, Harry was right about one thing. Yes, he was here to see Mizuki and support her. He had noticed that she was coming to work more tired because of the extra practices they had been doing in preparation for both their cheerleading tournaments and to cheer for Hanegasaki’s other sports teams. So, he dragged Harry and Itaru to make it seem like they were just a bunch of boys ready to support their school’s baseball team during the semi-finals (albeit maybe he should have found people that were more inclined to enjoy sports). Being the Prince of Hanegasaki, if girls from his ‘fan club’ saw him treating Mizuki with favoritism, it could cause a lot of problems for her.  

“Hey guys!” a chipper voice called out to the three boys. Sure enough, there was Mizuki, waving her yellow pompoms as she walked up toward them.

“Hey, good to see you,” Saeki responded, clearing his throat. He could hear Harry snicker quietly beside him, but he would deal with him later.

“It’s, so awesome you guys could make it. The baseball team has been working hard this year!”

“Shiba is playing today, right?” Harry asked, a big grin on his face. “Man, that guy is so awesome.”

“Yep! Katsumi-kun has probably been working the hardest, in my opinion. With him as our ace, there is no way we can lose.”

As Mizuki continued to chat with Harry and Hikami, she lowered her pompoms and placed them behind her back, Saeki got a proper look at her outfit.

Okay fine. Harry was right about two things; he certainly didn’t dislike the cheerleading uniform, especially on Mizuki. The black knee-high stockings, the cerulean blue V-neck sweater that matched the (surprisingly) short skirt...

Was it him or was it getting warmer out here?

“Kiki-sempai! We’re gonna be starting soon!”

Saeki snapped out of his thoughts, which was probably for the best. Who is Kiki?

A bubbly, pink-haired boy in one of the black oendan uniforms came skipping down across the field and wrapped his arms around Mizuki from behind in a friendly manner.

A bit too friendly.

“Sorry, I was just catching up with my friends before the game,” Mizuki replied. “Shouta, these are Itaru Hikami, Harry Kounoshin, and Teru Saeki,”

Shouta’s purple eyes looked squarely at Saeki when Mizuki mentioned his name, looking him up and down a couple of times.   

“Ehh~? So, you’re the Prince of Hanegasaki huh,” he asked before leaning his chin onto Mizuki’s shoulder. While his voice sounded curious, his facial expression said otherwise. His purple eyes narrowed slightly, a slight sneer that the rest of the boys could see.

“I don’t see what the big deal is,”

Saeki felt something on his left temple twitch as well as a flutter in his chest. “Well, that’s not a nickname I chose, I assure you.”

“Mmm, well, I guess the girls will choose any pretty boy with a tan these days, huh?”

This little punk…

“Shouta-kun! Be nice. Teru works hard, so he does deserve that title” Mizuki playfully tapped one of his arms. “He’s right though, I really should get going, but I will talk to you guys after!”

With that, Shouta let her go and they took their leave, with her waving her pompoms one last time. Saeki could hear Harry snicker, which he felt warranted another elbow to the stomach, but he would leave it for now. Whatever. He didn’t care.

It wasn’t long before the baseball team came out and Mizuki and the rest of the cheerleading squad lead the Hanegasaki students into organized cheer whenever their batters were up. She wasn’t a different person while she was up there, but it was more like, cheerleading highlighted some of her best qualities. No- no, not those qualities. More like how she was just so hardworking and through that, could motivate people as well. While the two of them often bickered, he was also aware that she had a very positive and bubbly personality. It was enough that even he found himself in the spirit of the game. He actually wanted them to win and was following along with all the cheers. You know, to a point. He still needed to keep his composure after all. People were watching.

But he did have to admit this; Mizuki was incredibly cute out there. To top everything else off from earlier, there was certainly a lot of appeal to her shaking those pompoms. He didn’t think that he’d be the type to be into such frivolous, fanservice-y antics, but well. Here he was.

Okay fine, Harry was now right about three things.  

In the 9th inning, the crowd cheered and roared in celebration when the infamous Katsumi Shiba hit a home run, winning their team the game. Hanegasaki would be going to the finals! All that work really did pay off.  

“YOO! Now that was sick. Did you see that!? Just straight out of the park!” Harry said as everyone started to make their way off of the bleachers.

“I have to admit, this was truly a remarkable experience,” Itaru added. “Seeing how they did today, statistically speaking, they most certainly have a chance to win the city-wide tournament tomorrow against Habataki,”

“Ha-ha! YES, let’s bring it to those rich-kid snobs! But first, this calls for celebration. You guys up for karaoke or something?”

“I’ll catch up with you guys later,” Saeki responded, already starting to make his way in the opposite direction of them towards the field and small stadium. “I’m just gonna see if Mizuki needs anything,”

“You hear that Itaru? If she needs anything,” the guitarist started to make kissing sounds.

Oh, how he wanted to deck that musician square in the jaw, but for now, he continued walking, making sure that no one saw the pink rising in his cheeks. He then leaned against the wall of the concrete building, waiting for her to exit from the building where everyone was changing.

He did want to congratulate Mizuki for all her hard work and see if she wanted any company walking home. Celebrations for the actual athletes weren’t until tomorrow since they needed to be fresh for tomorrow’s game, and that included the cheerleaders. You couldn’t be doing dances and being flipped into the air while exhausted after all. Plus, it was just something he had gotten into the habit of lately. Because of her busy schedule, sometimes the only time they saw each other was when he would walk her home. It wasn’t anything weird, no matter what others thought.

Finally, he spotted the curly-haired cheerleader exiting through a door. Chatting with a very tall, muscular, and (admittedly) handsome baseball player.

Laughing and smiling.

“Mou, Katsumi-kun!” Saeki heard her say in playful annoyance, a big smile on her face.

And Katsumi Shiba, known for his serious demeanor, smiled back.

There was a flutter in his chest, just like when Shouta had his arms around Mizuki. That’s when he realized, it wasn’t a flutter, but a pang. Was this… jealousy?

No, he couldn’t be. Jealous? Jealous of what? That there’s a boy in the same club as her who has no problems placing his grubby little hands like it’s nothing? That the ace of the baseball team managed to make her laugh and blush? Why should he care? It’s like Itaru said, they were not officially together. They could hang out with whomever they wanted, and even go on dates. They had agreed. They were not a couple.

And now, he was starting to regret it.

[peachyblkdemonslayer]

Takuya is slowly but surely getting used to being around the Baji family.

As she sat on the couch as the big and very busy family made moves all over the house. Chifuyu cooked the lunch for the day along with Yūto and Akina helping feed the crowd of 11 people and a baby . As the 3 spoke in one of the many languages, he spoke in the house(which made her head spin a lot). Tsuyoi came on the side of her and gave a smile to the younger girl.

"Hey Taku! Nice to see you around again we've been missing you" She teased. Takuya face got warmed as she gave a sheepish smile.

"Yeah just been buying with school since our last year of high school" She gently detangled her hair with her fingers. She had a wash day coming up soon, she would need to get some more shampoo soon.

Tsuyoi scoffed at that before leaning into the couch more,"Oh yeah I'm glad I'm done with that shit I hated going to school"

"How come?"

"Not my thing to be honest only went through with it cause of Dad and Papa wanted me to at least have my high school diploma. After that I could do what I saw fit"

That's the one thing she loved most about this family the way they went against the norm of this country. Keisuke and Matsuno only cared about a few things in life, their family, their friends, and making sure to uphold good morals. They didn't care how people side eyed them cause of their large family unit or how they always made comments about how their kids acted mostly the girls. They never paid them any mind, and she loved it so much, one of the biggest reasons she fell for Kazue.

"Well that's to be excepted Uncle Baji and Chifuyu really only cares that you guys are happy and can support yourself" Takuya replied.

"Yup thats- Holy shit Kie put some pants on." Tsuyoi hissed as he looked at the stairways behind them. And she didn't know what made her look behind her at the statement, but she most definitely did in a moment of lack of common sense.

At the halfway point of the staircase was the eldest of the Baji brood, Kie. The 27 looked like she just got out of bed from her messy long curls and drowsy face. She was wearing a tank top and very small boy shorts that almost didn't exist as they ride up between her thick thighs. She stretched and swiped at her younger sister before going back upstairs to do just that.

"Geez what's her problem"

"Cmon Tsu relax on her she's been through a lot lately", said Akina says as she left the kitchen with a few dishes in her hands.

"Yeah you could be a bit more compassion about that you know~" Yūto teases as they placed more dishes at the table. They heard the door open and a few people walk into the house.

"Were home!" Said a very deep voice. It was Keisuke, Hewai, Kiyoko, and Kazue. Takuya lit up as she saw her boyfriend waving at him with a huge sweet grin on her face. The youngest did the same as he returned the wave and helped to put up the groceries in the kitchen. Chifuyu came out with more dishes in hand as he spoke out to his kids in what she assumed was Korean to do something as Hewai revoked to him.

"Chifuyu were the rest for the Lomo Saltado?" Keisuke yelled out.

"Kie and Nonoka ate the rest of it a little after you guys left!"

"What!?!? Dammit I was looming forward to that" at that moment said two people made their way down the stairs Kie wearing some sweats pants with her infant son in her arms.

"Papa what are we eating today?" Nonoka asked making her way to the chabudai asking her siblings set up the table.

"We're eating tempura, yakitori, cold soba, mandoo, Korean fried chicken, vegetables, and rice," he lists off.

"Ooh hell yeah!" She said happily. Asahi babbles happily at as he clapped his hands at the steaming plates of dishes as he bounced in his mother's arms.

"Alright everyone let's eat !"

As everyone made their way to sit, Kazue grabbed Takuya hand and gave a slow thumb rub against the back of her hand in a loving manner. She held on tighter as they sat down and began eating as everyone talked about their days as the passing of dishes around the table and filling up cups.

Takuya is an only child, so dinner wasn't this loud and rowdy and kinda of chaotic, but she liked it a lot. The almost yelling banter between them that ended up with laughter between them with no malicious intent in the jokes. Asahi little fists filled with food that he took off his mama plate and smashed into his mouth, getting it all over the place. Keisuke and Matsuno whispered to each other and held hands as they looked at each other with the kind of love she hoped to have in the future.

"Hey, you ok?" She snapped out of her daze and looked over at the pair of worried brown eyes.

"Yeah just thinking is"

"About?"

She was quiet before she spoke, "Just how happy I am to be here"

Takuya belongs to @insomniac-jay

[haileygarciasunshine]

A Little Party Never Killed Anybody

Great Gatsby AU

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Gatsby!Reader

Written: May 17th, 2021

Posted: May 17th, 2021

Warning: Mentions of Alcohol.

Word Count: 1,678

Author's Note: Steve and Bucky come back from the war, and it's based in 1920, not 1940.

Cat's Pajamas: Anything good, the best, the greatest.

High-Hat: To Snub, be Snotty.

Summary: The reader meets Two soldiers that Jay befriended in the army. Fluff

TV and Movie Inspired Masterlist

Groaning, you pulled into the driveway. As per usual, the house was filled with party-goers. The house was so luminescent, that you could see the lights from miles away.

It wasn't long before one of the many butlers that your brother employed greeted you.

"Good evening, miss Gatsby." He stood beside your car door, waiting for any form of instruction.

"Good evening." You grinned, exiting the car. "I'm assuming my brother is brooding as per usual." You spoke tugging off your gloves.

"Yes, he is, miss Gatsby." He nodded.

Exhaling a huff, you nodded. "Of course he is." Turning toward the house, you felt dread wash over you. The jazz band's music danced through the air as people danced along.

"I suppose I should get going then." You spoke as your voice broke.

Making your way towards the stairs, you were abruptly stopped by the butler.

"Wait, miss Gatsby!"

Furrowing your eyebrows together in confusion, you turned slightly allowing yourself to gaze at him.

"Yes?"

Clearing his throat, he adjusted his collar. "Mr. Gatsby told me not to tell you-"

"Is that so?" You questioned raising an eyebrow.

"He invited Two of his friends from the war-"

Cutting him off with a groan, you rolled your eyes grumbling to yourself.

"I think you might find their presence refreshing..." He muttered, quickly getting in your car and taking it to the garage.

Standing on the steps stunned, you hummed in thought.

One of the many drunken party-goers stumbled behind you.

"Gatsby's party is the Cat's Pajamas!" He bellowed holding his arms out as if to show.

Jumping, you felt your heart race as you were startled by the sudden booming voice.

Scoffing, you stomped into the house. It became much more of a hassle to dodge drunken people. Wherever you walked, it reeked of alcohol.

Making your way to the second floor, you stood on one of the many platforms that overlooked the party.

"There you are!" Jordan's voice singsonged through your ears.

Rolling your eyes, you were about to come face to face with one of the people you had a strong dislike for.

Turning around, you plastered a fake smile upon your lips. If you hadn't put on a smile, word would spread that you were a bad co-host.

Leaning in, you greeted her with air kisses as she did you.

"Where have you been-"

"Y/N!" Jay's familiar voice called. "I've been looking everywhere for you. Come, there's someone I want to introduce you to." Swooping in, he linked his arm through yours. "Pardon me, miss Baker." He spoke, offering her his signature flirtatious smile. "I must steal my sister away." Lifting her hand to his lips, he placed a gentle kiss on the back of it.

The sound of Jordan's giggles filled the air. Only those standing immediately close to her would be able to hear. A pink tint danced along her cheeks, as she gave Jay a toothy grin.

Whisking you away, he ushered you into one of the rooms he had one of the butlers clear out. Closing the door, you let out an exasperated sigh.

"Thanks for the save." You chuckled, making yourself comfortable on one of the chairs.

Chuckling, Jay nodded. "Of course."

"So, is there really someone you want me to meet, or was that just one of the great gatsby rumors?" You questioned raising an eyebrow.

Rolling his eyes, Jay stood in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows. Clasping his hands together behind his back, he stared in admiration at the Greenlight across the bay.

"There is." He muttered. "I just figured I'd give you a moment to regroup since we both know how you get when you're around too many people."

Sighing, you joined your brother's side.

"How long are you going to keep waiting for her?" You questioned glancing up toward your brother. You were overwhelmed with sorrow, as your heart broke for him.

"As long as it takes," Jay responded without missing a beat. "I've loved always loved her."

Frowning, you nodded. Even if you didn't understand why he felt strongly towards Daisy, you pushed your personal feelings for her aside in support of your brother. Jay had girls throwing themselves at him left and right, but he never took up their offers.

Opening your mouth to speak, you were interrupted by the sound of someone knocking.

"Sorry to bother you mister and miss Gatsby..." The butler's voice trailed off, as he opened the door, allowing himself and two other men inside the room. "I have mister Rogers, mister Barnes, and mister Carraway."

"Thank you," Jay spoke dismissing the butler.

Glancing at Jay, you couldn't stop yourself from feeling confused. He was throwing an enormously luxurious party yet, he stood here in an empty room wanting to introduce two friends of his to his sister. Both men stood before you proudly, in their uniforms.

Clearing your throat, you shook your head in an attempt to clear your mind.

Smiling, you extended your hand greeting the men. "It's nice to meet you."

Glancing up, you felt a strange sense of Deja Vu.

"Have...Have we met before?" You questioned glancing between Mister Barnes and Mister Rogers.

"Please, call me Steve." He spoke shaking your hand graciously. "This is Bucky."

"Y/N." You spoke.

"We served in the war, with your brother." Bucky chimed in, his blue eyes piercing into yours.

"Ah, yes." You thought aloud as you nodded.

Before you knew it, the room had cleared, leaving you and Bucky alone. As time went by, you sat together on the loveseat in the room conversating for hours.

Attempting to stifle a yawn, you covered your mouth with your hand. Glancing at his wrist, Bucky gauged the time.

"It's getting late.." Bucky sighed. "I should probably go find Steve.."

"Oh, yes of course." You spoke, feeling a ping of sadness. Out of all the men you had met, Bucky had been the most genuine.

Leading you out of the room, it wasn't long before you were caught in a swarm of women. Each one, desperately wanting Sargent Barnes' attention.

As more and more women, came, the more distance that was created between you. Frowning, you found yourself on the outside of the swarm

Turning on your heel, you began making your way down the hall. Tears foamed in your eyes as you walked away.

A warm firm hand clasped around yours preventing you from any further retreating.

"Where do you think you're going doll?" Bucky questioned, giving you his warm toothy smile.

Rolling your eyes, you yanked your hand out of his, earning a frown from him. "I'm surprised you noticed with all the High-Hat women around you." You spat, crossing your arms along your chest.

The beads and sequins of your dress lightly scratching your skin in the process. Luckily, you had been wearing one of your favorite dresses. It was a baby pink tank dress, with hand-sewn beads and sequins all through it. Around your middle, the dress had a silver belt made of beads.

As you stood before Bucky, you shifted all of your weight upon one leg. With your free one, you began impatiently tapping on the marble floor.

Bucky smirked at you, as he read you. Tilting his head, he bit his lip. "Are you...Are you jealous miss Gatsby?"

Scoffing, you rolled your eyes. "Not even in your dreams, mister Barnes." You spat, resuming your walk down the hall.

"Oh!" He exclaimed chuckling. "You are!"

Not bothering to respond, you shook your head. The rest of the walk was filled with silence. Joining the party, you felt a slight panic bubble within you. Jay was always the more sociable between the two of you.

Sneaking a glance at you, Bucky was able to pick up on your sudden change in demeanor. Taking a chance, he slipped his hand into yours. The feeling of his warm firm hand, caused butterflies to erupt in your tummy. Glancing up, you sent him a closed-lip smile, silently thanking him.

It wasn't until you both had almost walked the entirety of the house that you found Jay and Steve.

"Great of you to finally join us." Jay teased.

Rolling your eyes, you let an exasperated huff tumble from your lips. Jay bounced his gaze from your conjoined hands to your face, sending you a silent question.

Removing your hand from Bucky's, you cleared your throat. As you glanced at his features, you thought you were able to see a flicker of disappointment.

Steve had excused himself for a brief moment, leaving the three of you alone. Something undescribable hung in the air.

"So, old sport..."

Shaking your head, you already drowned out what Jay was saying to Bucky. Gazing around the platform, you observed the party-goers. It had gotten much later resulting in the party slowly dying down. Some of the attendees had passed out along the steps while others were laying along the floor in the halls.

"What time works best for you?" The sound of Jay's question rang through your ears. Snapping your head towards either man, you gaped at your brother.

"Whatever it is, you don't have to participate in." You spoke turning toward Bucky. Panic began bubbling up.

"How about Nine?" Bucky questioned.

Jay smiled. "Nine it is then." He nodded, retreating to one of the rooms as he excused himself to take a call.

Turning to face you, there was a tinted color along Bucky's features. "I, uh.." His voice trailed off.

"We should get going," Steve spoke, clasping a hand on Bucky's shoulder. Gazing between you and him, he felt the electricity in the air. "Am I interrupting something?"

"No." You quickly responded. "I was just leaving." Following the direction that Jay had gone, your movements were hurried as you practically ran into the room.

Sighing, Bucky returned his gaze to Steve. "Oh, I know that look." Steve beamed staring between his best friend and the direction you had just retreated in.

"Shut up." He hissed, ducking his head. "Let's get out of here."

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[reneeluvsheeseung]

A/N : This actually inspired by @jayflrt ! They gave off their list of tropes and though I never thought about this one for Heeseung, I think it's super cute ! :3 I'm trying to make actually stories less than one shots T-T so let's pray this works out!

Warnings : Drinking, Kissing (??), Partying

Genre: Angst (i think?), Fluff, Romance

Heartbeat

"Jun and I could get you ready," Chaer offered. Holding your hands and shaking them a little, trying to convince you more.

"Hmmm," you knew she was right about this whole party thing. You needed to get over being dumped by Lee Heeseung. It had been months and yet you were the only one still thinking about it. "Okay okay, fine i'll go,"

The girl almost jumped in joy. "Oh my god! We gotta get you ready the party is in -" she paused to look at her phone, "2 HOURS!" she exclaimed. surprising herself more than anyone. You couldn't lie you were pretty excited for the party. This would be the second one you've ever been to despite being asked by many people.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"This looks great on you, Y/N" Jun said staring at the mirror next to you. You were wearing something a little revealing, definitely not something you would pick for yourself. Chaer snapped a few pictures of herself on your bed, 'Pre-Drunk' pictures she called them.

"Is this too much?" You asked, sliding your hands down your curves, which it perfectly hugged. Jun and Chaer both in unison shaking their heads no.

"Let's go before Y/N changes their mind," Chaer says, taking out her flask and taking a big gulp of the drink. Jun grabs your hand and leads you out to the car.

"Just enjoy yourself tonight, Y/N. Okay?" He looked at you through the front mirror. You nodded, acknowledging him only looking out for you. Chaer was using the mirror in the front seat checking her make-up.

Once you three arrived, the party seemed to already been started. The music was blaring loudly from down the street. Walking through the doorway was more anxiety filled than you had expected it to be. There were so many people you hadn't even noticed before from school. Chaer patted your back and went to what you assumed was the kitchen to get more drinks. To be completely honest, you were already starting to think this was a bad idea. Parties were never your thing, which is probably why this is your second one all year.

"Y/N!" Yeonjun waved over to you, from the living room. He signaled for you to go over to him, which you did. "I wasn't expecting to see you hear," he bent over a little to whisper in your ear. You laughed.

"I was dragged her by Chaer and Jun!" You sort of yelled so he could hear you over the loud music and bustling voices. He nodded.

"Wanna go play beer pong?" He held out his hand as he asked. You grabbed his hand as he lead you to where everyone was. Everyone also included Heeseung. When you saw him, it felt like everything else stopped. Like it was just you and him again. "Everyone I got my partner, let's play!" Yeonjun yelled. Everyone seemed to get riled up.

"Junnie," you patted his arm, he leaned down to hear you. "I have no idea how to play," you said sheepishly. Not going to parties also meant lack of knowledge with party games. He laughed and patted your head.

After the game was over, you were borderline drunk. Yeonjun had made you drink almost all of the ones he made to make up for the ones you missed. The night grew older as it was now 3 am and only your friend group stayed over. You guys sat around a fireplace, talking about foolish things like high school, girlfriends and boyfriends.

"Honestly I was surprised you even came," Sunghoon said to you, "I'm glad you did though," he smiled. You smiled back. You wish you had gotten closer to Sunghoon during high school but there was always a barrier when you tried to talk to him.

"She only came because we had to drag her," Chaer laughed, causing Jun to laugh as well. Yeonjun put his arm around you, which you didn't move. You were honestly pretty cold with your outfit and he warmed you up. Heeseung didn't leave that unnoticed. Instead, he stood up.

"I'm gonna go get more drinks, Y/N can you help?" He asked, you hesitated. Why would he be asking you of all the girls around you all. You nodded, standing up and looking at Yeonjun.

The walk inside the house was painfully quiet. The silence in the house was hurting your ears. Only the faint sounds of bottles rattling from Heeseung mixing and making drinks.

"Y/N," He said, setting down a bottle of vodka. You were looking down at the counter when he called your name. You looked up at him. It was only now you noticed how good he looked tonight. His dark hair parted to the side, you couldn't even deny. "How are you?" he simply asked.

"I'm.. good. How are you, Hee?" you accidentally slipped out the nickname. He didn't seem to visibly notice. He nodded.

"I'm okay," he softly said. He missed you. He knew it was wrong to break up with you. When your friends told him that you were better of without him he couldn't help but think it was true. He didn't realize how harmful he was for you. "I have to - tell you something. Will you please listen?" he innocently asked. His soft doe eyes still shimmering when he looked at you.

"Of course," you said. Sometimes when you're around him you forget about what happened. It all seemed so minor in cases like this. You did miss him, the situation hurt but nothing could ever break the attachment you had to him.

"I love you. You were my first everything. I wanted to be so perfect for you, that I didn't even realize that I wasn't doing a very good job. When your friends told me that I wasn't good enough for you, I started thinking about how you had been in past relationships with people like Yeonjun and I couldn't be anything like him. Seeing how you two still remained close had me thinking about how you couldn't even look at me. I get that, though. I just.. I wanted you to notice me so bad, Y/N." He said. Staring at you waiting for a response. It was a lot to take in on yourself, he knew that.

"Hee.." you started. He sighed. He knew that deep down this couldn't have been fixed. He wanted this to go in a different way.

Pt. 2 ? :3

[reignstormz]

| Lion & The Lamb |

INTRO; After hiding your secret crush on the hottest guy in school since freshman year, senior comes around and you finally come face to face with the Samoan, sharing an intimate moment together.

WORD COUNT; 2,300 (maybe, not sure, had some issues, pretty short)

WARNINGS; Takes place in 1984, Bullying, Sweet interactions.

CAST; Y/N ( Yourself) Y/B/F/ N ( Your best friend's name) Roman, Jey, Jimmy, Naomi, and Galina Anoa'i. (Just a story, not saying Galina is anything like her character in this fic)

MINI PLAYLIST; Give Me Your Love - Pebbles/ Two Occasions - The Deele / Ready Or Not - After 7 / Rock With You - Michael Jackson / Time After Time - Cyndi Lauper

🦋

NOVEMBER 9th, 1984

The sounds of teenage laughter filled your ears as you sat in the passengers seat of your best friend's car. You sighed, trying the best you could to block out the noise as you read your book that was sitting in your lap. It was a hectic, busy Friday night. Your school's football team had just won yet another game and everyone was at the Drive In Movie Theatre to celebrate, goof around, or get down to business. Typical things that high school students would be up to. You on the other hand, didn't go to the game and was only here because your best friend practically dragged you out of the house.

You were not so big into the normal teenage, high school experiences. You were very quiet, antisocial, and didn't have many friends. School dances weren't your thing, especially parties. Instead, your way of having fun was just keeping yourself company. You were one of the smartest, if not, the smartest girl in school; You were a straight-A student, and you loved to read. Reading brought you joy and gave you the opportunity to escape to a different reality. Many people labeled you as nerdy, but you could care less.

You were over people picking on you, and judging you, which was one of the biggest reasons why you were so reserved. You got bullied heavily up to 4th grade, and your parents decide to homeschool you until high school came around. They wanted things to turn around for you, but it was the exact same. The only difference was, you made one solid friend and you ate school lunch, something other than food from your refrigerator.

Currently, the theatre was going to show Prince's "Purple Rain" and you were in the car waiting for it to start with your best friend. She also happened to be a cheerleader. You met her in PE class, one joke led after another and you guys became very tight. You were kind of surprised that you two were friends since you were so opposite from each other, and from different crowds.

Y/B/F/N's turned her head to look at you. She sighed, rolling her eyes briefly before she snatched your book out of your grasp. You groaned with irritation, and turned as well to make eye contact with her, "Can you stop? You made me lose my place."

"Can you just have fun for once? Girl. We're at the movies and the first thing you want to do is shove your nose into a book." She shades, throwing your book into the backseat.

"I didn't want to come tonight." You stress to her, "I have studying and homework I need to do-"

"That's all you ever do." She cuts you off. "Come on, you've known how long I've wanted to see this movie. Just do this one thing for me, please?"

"So you want me to sit in a car for an hour?" You questioned. A smile slowly creeped onto her face, which quickly answered your question.

You sighed, unbuckling your seatbelt to get out of the car. She furrowed her eyebrows, "Wait, where are you going?"

"I'm getting snacks." You replied, and before you got out of the car she grabbed onto your wrist.

"Can you get some popcorn? Please?" She asked, with clear as day begging look on her face. You rolled your eyes and got out of the car before she asked for candy as well. Any ounce of candy in her system was a not an option, especially since she had to still take you home tonight. As you walked to the concession stand, you saw just about every single familiar face from school. You were so focused on not making eye contact with anyone that you accidentally bumped into another person in front of you, causing their drink to spill all over your white long sleeved shirt. A couple people who were walking by giggled and the girl you bumped into couldn't of been worse.

"Even those ridiculous glasses you wear still can't help you watch where you're going." Galina dissed, looking you up and down before pushing past your shoulder. Her best friend, Naomi, looked at you apologetically for a second before following behind her. You sighed, looking down at your ruined shirt and turned your head, glaring at her. You saw Galina and Naomi walk back to their car, where the the most popular guys in school happened to be. The twins, Jimmy and Jey Uso, were sitting in the trunk of the car while the guy you've had the biggest crush on for the longest was leaning against it.

Roman Reigns was by far the hottest guy you've ever laid eyes on. He was the captain of the football team, he was smart, and also very kind as well believe it or not. You've only talked to him once, and that was when your chemistry teacher paired you two up for a project not too long ago. Roman was nothing but sweet to you, but since you were extremely shy and quiet, you barely said a word to him the entire time. Not only that, you didn't want any rumors to get out that you liked him. You would get teased nonstop, and Galina, who happened to be his girlfriend, would go out of her way to publicly humiliate you. However, it was nothing new. She was the typical mean girl that everyone was afraid of; You, well you weren't afraid of her really, you just didn't have the energy to deal with her bullshit so you always held your tongue.

"What happened to my fruit punch?" You heard Jey ask Galina. She sighed, wrapping her arm around Roman's waist while he looked down at her.

"Some nerd bumped into me and got it everywhere." She replies, and Roman raised his eyebrow.

"What nerd?" He says. Galina nods towards you. Before you and Roman made eye contact, you quickly turned back around and hurried to the bathroom to try to clean yourself up. This night couldn't get anymore embarassing, you thought.

You stared at yourself in the mirror with a lost expression. There was no way you were going to get this stain out of your shirt. You heavily sighed, adjusting your slightly crooked glasses. As you let a hand fall from your nose to your chin in stress, a strand of your sleeve ended up getting caught on a piece of your braces.

You rolled your eyes, groaning. You hated wearing braces for a million reasons, but this was the main reason why you couldn't wait to get them off soon. They got caught into everything. You tried again and again to get the strand to untangle itself but it wasn't budging. Shit, you thought. Now you had no choice but to go back to the car so your friend could help you. So many things were going wrong tonight and all you wanted to do was just go home at this point.

You took a deep breath before exiting the bathroom. As you turned the corner, you almost ran into someone else for the second time. You sighed, closing your eyes for a second before looking down.

"I'm sorry." You apologized, sounding a little funny since the strand was still stuck on your braces.

"Damn, you need some help with that?" An attractive voice said, that you immediately recognized. Fuck, you cursed in your head. You slowly looked up and saw the tall Samoan tower over you with a concerned look on his face. You nervously started to tap your foot and your heart began to beat very fast.

His facial expression turned into an amused one and he gently took the strand out of your hand to help you get it loose, "I'll take that as a yes."

Within a minute, he got the strand loose from your braces and you were finally able to rest your arm by your side. You shyly pulled your sleeve shirt down, "Thanks.."

He nodded with a faint smile on his face. Little did you know, Roman always had a thing for you as well. He knew you as the quiet girl in class, ever since freshman year. It was now senior year and you haven't changed a bit. You guys were in classes together but never spoke before, or even sat together until one project. He admired the fact that you were different; Girls threw themselves at him all the time, which made you think that you could never stand a chance but you were wrong. He loved the fact that you were extremely smart and had a head on your shoulders. You had a unique type of beauty that he adored; The glasses, braces, the infectious laugh and the shyness. Roman deep down has a weak spot for the nerdy girls, even though no one knows about that at all. People assume all the time of what his type is or who he was as a person, when really no one knew who he truly was. The only people that knew him best were his family, and Galina at one point but as time went on Roman wasn't happy with the person she's become.

Galina was practically Roman's day one, they've known each other since they were kids through a family friend. She was never like this intimidating, rude person that she was now. Galina actually use to be very sweet, but ever since high school came around and she started hanging out with certain crowds, that's when the popularity really went to her head. Even though it made Roman sad at times that she wasn't the same person she used to be, he was not afraid to let her know how he felt about it. She promised him she'd change, but she's so far gone that it's out of control. You can't make people change, they have to do that on their own and if not, it's time to let them go. Roman thought about doing that many times, but he just didn't want to hurt her, especially with the history they had. It was just hard all around, and you made it even more tough for him.

"Whatchu' doin here all alone?" Roman asks curiously, then looked down at your shirt subtly. He saw a huge red stain and his mind went back to Galina saying she spilled her fruit punch on someone. He couldn't really make out your face since you walked away so fast, but now he figured out that you were the person that she might of spilled it on. Shit, he cursed in his head. Roman felt very guilty.

You noticed that he looked down at your shirt, causing you to slightly cover yourself from embarrassment. Chuckling nervously, you say "Oh, um. I accidentally spilled my drink everywhere..so I came here to clean it up."

He knew that you were lying since he was aware of what happened, but he didn't push it. He's noticed a lot of people cover Galina's ass so they don't get on her bad side. Roman nodded, looking down and unzipped his black jacket that was apart of his track suit, "I got sum' for you then."

"No no that's okay," You kindly reject. You look behind him to see if anyone walks in on the two of you and your heart starts to race. Lord knows that no one can see you in his jacket. Especially Galina, if so, everyone would be on your ass. You didn't feel like dealing with that drama.

Once he took the jacket fully off, your eyes went directly to his arms. Damn, his biceps were huge. You were completely glued to them until Roman jokes out of the blue, "You know, if you wanna' feel them you can just ask."

You snapped out of it and you covered your face, trying to hold back a laugh while blushing. You looked back up at him with a smile on your face, "That's hands down the corniest thing you've ever said to me."

"At least it made you laugh." Roman says with a small smile on his face. You admire his gorgeous smile while you had one of your own, gently grabbing the jacket out of his hands. You couldn't help but take it after that. This reminded you of all the times Roman would crack the dumbest jokes in class just to get you to smile, since you were so quiet and rarely talked to him. It went over your head that he only did it to impress you.

"I should probably back to my friend before she freaks out." You say shyly, thanking him for the jacket before getting ready to leave. Roman didn't want you to leave since he was enjoying this moment alone he had with you, so he thought fast and quickly stood in front of you. Real smooth, Roman.

You looked at him weirdly and Roman's face turned red. He was going to say something but he completely forgot his train of thought, making you want to laugh. The look on his face was priceless. The both of you grinned at each other before you fell out laughing.

"Don't look at me like that, girl.." Roman said bashfully, rubbing the back of his neck while you giggled.

"I'm sorry, but you should've seen the look on your face." You pointed towards his face, not being able to contain your laughter, making him laugh even harder. He had the cutest laugh, you could listen to it all day. Once you guys both pulled it together, you both stared at each other in a comfortable silence before he asked, "Do you mind if I can buy you some popcorn or something?"

"Oh, I couldn't ask you to do that Roman-"

"Don't worry bout' it, come on." He chuckles, nodding towards the exit. You smiled at him, secretly loving every second of this. Never in a million years you would've thought a crush of yours would go out of his way to do this for you. Roman was such a good guy; You were having such a bad night before and he instantly made it better.

You both walked out of door and to the concession stand. The entire time, you guys stood there goofing off and talking while you waited in line. As you guys were occupied in a conversation, you noticed that you were getting a couple of suspicious looks since you were wearing Roman's jacket. However, no one dared to mess with you or give you slick comments either since they were shocked that you happened to be friends with him. Roman wouldn't hesitate to defend you if they did anyway in a heartbeat, but they knew better. You've seen Roman on multiple occasions stick up for people who got picked on at school, and it made your heart beat even harder for him. If there was a way you could just tell him how you felt, you would, but there was just no way in hell that was possible.

"Thanks, Roman. Even though I really don't need all of these snacks-" You giggled softly, looking down at the bag of snacks he had gotten you. Even though you couldn't never complain about snacks.

"Shh." He joked, cutting you off and took the opportunity to sneak cotton candy in your mouth so you'd stop talking, making you laugh. Roman smirked, taking his thumb and wiped off your bottom lip a little bit.

A frog got caught in your throat again as he flirtatiously wiped your lip. You both gazed into each other's eyes for what it seemed like forever until you both heard the movie start. You cleared your throat, and from behind him you saw Galina, Naomi and the Usos stare at you while they were still at the car. The Usos looked at each other with dumbfounded look on their face, like they wanted to laugh but they knew Galina would kill them. Naomi softly smiled at the two of you, while Galina had the most pissed off look on her face.

"Hey..I'll see you at school?" You say to him, with a soft smile on your face but not too noticeable since you knew Galina was staring at you.

Roman simply nodded, returning the smile and just stared at you in awe quietly. You said your goodbyes before you went back to your friend's car.

"Damn, Y/N. I just said popcorn not the whole concession stand." She says, looking at me weirdly. Then she just blankly stared at you for a minute before her eyes widen, realizing what you had on.

"Bitch, is that Roman's Jacket?" She squealed, and you hushed her real quick before she got excited.

"I'll explain later, okay?"

Your friend alternated looks between you and the movie, giving you the side eye as she took the popcorn out of your lap, "This conversation isn't over."

TAGS; @gold--gucciempress @wwzentertainment @flawlessglamazon @nicolewoo @romanreignshairdresser @sassymox @pennysky @lemonjvicey @thandiwethagirl @haharollins @rollinshield3 @sheerbeautyreigns @zaddyreigns @brookethegamer @alination @vir-tual @reigns-5sos @wickedsunfire

[arminbitchlover]

reincarnated lovers (2)

armin arlert x f! reader

summary: after a terrible first date with armin, sasha convices reader to go out to a party but only to have an unexpected turn of events

word count: 2.8k

content warnings: mentions of drug use, alcohol use, assault is insinuated but doesn't actually happen

"YOU LOOK SOOO GOOD," Sasha squeals as you show her your outfit, making your confidence boost significantly.

"YOU TOO, YOU'RE SO HOT FOR NO REASON!" You both keep showering each other with confidence, not caring if your neighbors could hear you shouting.

You don't understand why you're suddenly filled with anticipation to go to some frat house that would be filled with strangers and smell like alcohol and weed, but you not troubled enough to even question it. All you know is that this is your first party as a freshman, and you want to make the most out of it with your best friend.

"So, who's going that you know anyways?" You glance at Sasha through your mirror as you apply lip gloss.

"Too many to count honestly and not to alarm you or anything but Jean will be there too." Sasha reluctantly spoke as you feel your heart drop to your stomach.

You completely forgot that Jean was a part of Sasha's friend group and now you're going to see him for the very first time since your breakup.

"Y/n?" Sasha waves her hand in front of your face and snaps you out of your deep thoughts.

"Sorry, but thanks for telling me." You shake your head as you try to not lose your train of thought again.

You and Sasha finish up on your final touches and make your way to the party as you feel your stomach flipping and hands slightly shake. Every time you start to tell yourself that Jean was just a friend now, you get flashbacks of everything you did as a couple, but you're going to let some guy ruin your first night out in college.

It doesn't take long to arrive and fuck, it didn't take long for the feelings of regret, nervousness, and panic to sink in. When you first arrive, people were already drunk in the front yard as couples made out the staircase leading to the front door. Immediately when opening the door, the bass from the speakers maakes your whole body vibrate with the music and your eyes strain from all the lights that were being cast across the house.

The whole place is already trashed with cups, plates, and different articles of clothing are scattered across the floor. You've always heard about how wild college parties can be, but you didn't expect something as crazed as this.

You turn to Sasha and see her talking to you but could only read her lips that make out, "I'm... drink," and walk away to the kitchen.

Well, shit.

You awkwardly stand in the middle of the room, not recognizing a single person until you feel a hand clasp your shoulder and pull you to a corner.

"Heya, gorgeousss, name's Flochhh..." A drunk man with auburn hair presses you against the wall as he tries to make conversation with you.

"S-Sorry, but I have to go." You try to get away from him only to have your arm get pulled back to the wall.

"Fucking let me go!" You fight to yank your arm away but don't have enough strength to succeed.

"Buttt I wantss to get chu know you babyyy." He leans in, trying to get your faces closer together, but luckily you dodge him quick enough to get out of his grasp.

"Watchu doinn- runninnn from me." He grasps your hand, but right when you were about to get pinned back against the wall again, you hear a stern voice.

"Get your hands off of her." You and Floch turn and see Armin, but this time with slightly smudged eyeliner with a long black sleeve that's complemented with a necklace and silver rings on both of his hands.

"Huhhh-," Floch slurs, finally letting go of you and confronting Armin.

Armin takes a step back with his hands in his pockets, not wanting to cause any issues, and lightly asserts, "This is my lovely girlfriend, so I would appreciate it if you would just back off, that's all."

Armin walkes up to you and wraps his arm around your waist as Floch's face becomes filled with complete disgust.

"So if you'll excuse us, we'll be getting out of your way so you can get as shitfaced as you like." He smirks at Floch and pulls you away, his hand still clutching your waist.

As he takes you away, you immediately notice how his arm feels so natural around you, like it was meant to be there which causes your heartbeat to quicken.

You only see him as the boy you went on an awkward date with, why did he suddenly make you feel this way?

"Thank you for your help, Armin." You bring your hand to the one that was resting on your waist and squeeze it to show your gratitude.

"I was only doing the bare minimum, no need to thank me." He tenderly looks into your eyes with compassion, not aware that he never let go of your waist.

"Well, what were you doing here anyway, you didn't catch me as the party type." You playfully joke as he grabs your arm and enters a large crowd that's dancing to music.

He turns to face you and tilts his head towards your ear to answer, "I heard you were coming, and I wanted to talk to you."

He grabs you by the waist and starts moving to the beat of the song to follow along with everyone surrounding you.

You feel your face start to heat up, finding it so attractive the way he leaned in to talk to you. He's a completely different person from the guy you went out with. This time he seems so much more confident by the way he holds you, speaks to you, and his fashion did a complete 180.

"Well, what's up?" You gain enough courage to wrap your arms around his neck and move your body with his.

You both move completely in sync forgetting for a second that you weren't the only two people in the room. You feel yourself start to get more butterflies as he maintains eye contact with you and slowly pulls you closer and closer. Before you know it, you have the biggest smile on your face as you have the time of your life with Armin.

This is what you've been missing out on, while you had been locked up in your dorm, exhausting yourself with no sign of ending. While Sasha's the one who made you come out of your comfort zone, Armin's the one who making you enjoy yourself the most and you love the idea of that. You love knowing that there's a person who could actually make you a better person and still make you feel comfortable while being alone with him.

"I don't really know how to explain this, but-"

"Y/N!!" Sasha pushes her way into the crowd and finds you and Armin with your bodies only centimeters apart, but seemingly didn't notice the tension between the two of you.

"Armin, I told you to find her and come to the game room!" She scolds Armin and pulls him away from you, making you feel a bit upset that you're not able to be alone with him a bit longer.

She takes you and Armin to another room that you assume were their friends because as soon as they enter, they're greeted with open arms. You immediately notice a small blonde girl and a tall brunette with freckles sitting together on a love seat and you have to admit that they make such a great couple. Sasha introduces you to everyone in the room and while it was pretty packed, it's easy to memorize who everyone is given that Sasha has mentioned them many times before.

Before you had the chance to settle in with everyone you see Connie get out of his seat and clear his throat very loudly to make an announcement.

"I think that it's only fair, since y/n is the newbie of the group, to play a 2v2 intense game of beer pong between me and Jean." Connie widely grins as everyone agrees and starts rioting.

"I heard my name." Jean abruptly enters, at first not noticing that you're in the same room.

"Well, I don't have a partner to play with so-" You feel a bit of shame while speaking but are quickly interrupted.

"I'll play with y/n," Armin speaks up and everyone gets louder, becoming enraptured as if this is the biggest game in history.

"Let's fucking go then." Jean locks eyes with you for a split second before talking to Connie.

You have to admit, while Jean looks like he's taking good care of himself, you don't feel the butterflies and tension that you thought you would. Maybe you're just overthinking everything because he's your first love, but you figure that maybe something would be left for him. You look back at Jean making sure you don't feel anything, but when you turn to face Armin. Butterflies. Even if it was just a tiny bit, something was there.

For him.

"You guys got this, I mean no offense to the other two, but they're either high, tipsy, or a bit of both." Eren walks up to you two as he chuckles and rubs the back of his neck.

"I've never played this before, so we'll see." You look down, afraid that Eren or Armin would judge you in some way.

"Neither has Armin, he always watches other people play, but I'm pretty surprised he volunteered himself. So, I'm guessing that your first date went pretty well today." Eren playfully nudges Armin as his face turns into a very light pink.

"Um, yeah it was pretty alright," You reply and smile at Armin, even though you both knew that your date was anything but 'alright'.

"Okay, it's set up, you guys can start whenever," Mikasa speaks with a complete monotone voice as she takes a seat back down next to Historia and Ymir.

You and Armin walk to your side of the table as Connie and Jean do the same, while everyone stands around the two teams ready to start their ear-piercing shouts. You start to feel a bit of pressure right before the game started, anxious that you'll make yourself look like a fool if you don't at least make a single cup.

"We'll give Armin the first shot." Connie cockily smirks and bounces the ping pong ball across the table.

Armin grabs the ball with his fingertips and starts calculating the way he would throw the ball. You have to admit, he looked absolutely adorable while concentrating on making it into the cup. You figure that maybe he thinks the same as you, not wanting to embarrass himself, but he looks so relaxed at the same time. After a few more seconds of critical thinking, he carefully throws the ball and makes it perfectly into the middle cup.

Expectedly, everyone starts screaming, jumping up and down, while some people grab Armin and shake him profusely as their excitement shoots through the roof. You can't help but feel thrilled for him as well, and right when his friends get their hands off of Armin, you wrap your arm around his neck and bring him in for a tight hug. You immediately pull away, unsure if he's uncomfortable being hugged by someone he barely knows, but when you take a step back you see his eyes light up with a small smile.

"Cut it out, love birds. It's my shot," Jean shoots Armin a snarky look and chugs the shot. He wasn't concentrating as much as Armin was, probably because he's played this game many times before, and to your surprise, he recklessly tosses the ball and makes a spiral dunk into the cup at the front of the formation.

"GOOD SHIT, JEAN!" Connie aggressively smacks Jean's back, causing him to jump forward and knock down two cups in the back row.

"Are you fucking kidding me, Connie?" Jean hits the back of Connie's head and they both drink whatever liquid was left in the cup and takes them out of the formation.

You look at the cup that has the ball in and right when you're about to take the shot, Armin swiftly takes it out of your grasp and drinks it as if it's water.

At this point, everyone was making fun of Connie's fuck up and cheering on Armin for chugging the shot like nothing while you're panicking in your thoughts, begging yourself not to make a foot out of yourself.

"Here." Armin hands you the ball and you feel your anxiety kick in as everyone's focus goes directly to you.

You feel your fingertips lightly quiver as you begin to aim the ball into the last cup in the back. Predictably, the ball hits the rim of the cup and doesn't make it in, but Armin still whispers to you a few words of encouragement as Marco picks up the ball from the floor and hands it to Connie. The game continues and luckily you and Armin win because of the two cups Jean knocked down, so while you and Armin are a bit tipsy, the others are completely plastered.

"This... nngh - bullshizz..." Connie clumsily walks over to you and hooks his arm around your neck, somewhat pulling you down while speaking to you.

"Alright, enough." Armin pulls Connie's arm away from you and takes you out of the room, before getting the chance to say bye to anyone.

"Armin-" He leads you to an empty room and doesn't hesitate to lock the door behind him.

"Please, let me talk, I've been waiting all night." Armin pulls you to the edge of the bed and slowly sits down as he tries to figure out how to come out with his news. You gently place your hand on top of his and give it a gentle squeeze, reassuring him.

While you did have a feeling about what he'a going to say, you don't want to jinx anything too good to be true. Even though when you first met Armin it wasn't the greatest first impression, spending time with him at the party made you realize that he's so much more than the awkward guy you went out with. You don't understand how your feelings for him switched up so fast in a matter of a day, but you don't care. At this point, Jean's completely out of the picture and something in you is telling yourself that there's something really special about Armin.

“So, um basically I just want to apologize for everything that happened earlier at the café. I-It’s just that you’re the first girl I’ve ever taken out and I didn’t want to fuck up, but I did absolutely everything wrong. It didn’t help how Sasha was talking so highly of you and god, when I saw your pictures, I thought you were the most perfect person I ever laid my eyes on. Then when I saw you, something in me just clicked that you were meant to be mine and I’m not one to believe in that love at first sight bullshit, so I didn’t know what to do. I just nervous and I didn't know what to do. I knew you were and still are way out of my league even though I felt like you were my person, but I didn't want to mess it up, so I tried to be distant to make it go away and I realized how fucking stupid that was. I'm so sorry for wasting your time and I was hoping we could have a second chance at a first date again to make it up to you." He has such a pained but relieved look on his face when he finishes talking, not looking at you, afraid that he may have done something that he would regret.

"I would actually love that, Armin." You exchange smiles and both stare at each other for a second in comfortable silence.

"Well, let's go then."He stands up and brings out his hand to yours.

"Wait what?" You give him a confused look as you place your hand in his and get up from the bed.

"Are you tired or something?" He furrows his eyebrows with a bit of a pouty face.

"No, not at all." You intertwine your fingers with his and make your way out of the frat house, forgetting say goodbye to anyone.

"So, where are you taking me so late at night?" You ask and turn to look at him to see a small smile plaster on his face.

"I was hoping I could take you back to my apartment to make us a proper meal after all that partying." You feel your heart pounding against your chest as he has the most genuine look in his eyes.

"Absolutely."

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[dearest-kibble]

WELLL GANG IT TOOK FOR FUCKIN EVER BUT HEY HERE IT IS ABOUT 7,000 WORDS OF KAGEYAMA. THANK YOU ALL FOR STICKING WITH ME IT REALLY MEANS A LOT THAT Y’ALL WERE STILL HERE EVEN THOUGH I WAS TAKING FOREVER LIKE HOLY FUCK MAN I APPRECIATE YOU ALL SO SO SO MUCH FOR THIS AND HOPE IT’S ALRIGHT!! 

tw: noncon dacryphilia breathplay(choking) kidnapping general shady-ness  very blink and you’ll miss religious symbolism. Abuse

“Don’t mess this up Kageyama.” You wake up in an old building, seven men stand above you, head to toe in suits. And you distinctly remember reading something someday, about how the yakuza always cover their body. And about how the yakuza have a hand in human trafficking.

“Damn Kageyama, we don’t do any of that Oikawa-Gumi shit here!” The Man who's speaking is shirtless and his hair is buzzed short. He’s got a red dragon winding up his stomach and a red koi on his sternum.

“So many women were brought to Oikawa I just thought-” The man - Kageyama you assume - has black hair and blue eyes. You think he’s staring at you.

“You thought? I find that hard to believe.” A guy with glasses (do yakuza wear glasses?) sniffs and turns his nose at Kageyama. “I thought you only thought about being Oyabun.”

“Shittykawa is a liar and you all know it!”

“Still more honorable than a guy who deserted his family and has a samurai tattoo!” A considerably smaller redhead speaks up with a defiant voice.

“They betrayed me!!” His attention (if it was on you, is not anymore.) shifts as Kageyama raises his voice, flails his hands a little and starts to pace.

“Kageyama, be quiet!” A man behind you talks. The man with blue eyes immediately stops talking, the man with glasses and blonde hair laughs.

“All of you shut up!” A louder voice bounces off the walls, all five men stop talking and look to the man behind you. He’s got brown hair, short, militant and an angry-looking scowl on his face. The man next to him has silver hair, but you don’t think it’s from age. A chorus of “sorry Oyabun” echoes through the room, large, dark and empty.

“Kageyama, you will not mess this up.” Intense coal eyes stare into blue.

“No Oyabun, I will not.”

“Good because she’s under your care.” You almost expect the man with brown hair to offer you a smile, it’s the silver haired one who does.

“What?!” You turn around quickly as the voice sounds much closer than you remember it being. “I’m-” The man takes a few seconds looking at his fingers. (His left pinky is a stub) Before continuing. “Oikawa never had me do anything like that. Girls just talked to me.”

“Girls talked to you!?” A newer person, short, standing next to the shirtless one - has an energetic voice. “Why’d you ever leave?”

“Because Oikawa treats his family like shit!” And like that, the talking erupts into furious voices trying to get a word in edgewise until once more, the two behind you speak up.

“Everyone shut up!”

Once again they all fall silent.

“Kageyama, get her where she needs to go. You know what to do right?”

“Yes Oyabun.”

“Good.” His gaze is away from you, glaring at someone else as silence splits the room.

“C’mon.” He makes a show of not looking at you when he gruffly gestures for you to move to his side. Try as you might to seem calm, your joints are cold and stiff as you march to his left.

“Don’t cause a fuss okay?” He sends a sharp glare your way.

“She’s terrified Kageyama, you don’t need to scare her more.” The man with silver hair looks at you more apologetically than you’d thought a yakuza could. But as his hands rest on his hips you can see the gun holstered on his side. You look away quickly after smiling quickly.

“Yeah! Be nicer to her!” Kageyama shrugs off what the redhead says and walks towards the singular door and opens it to walk through. It leads to an empty, grey hallway - chilled and complete with flickering light. About fifteen paces ahead, there's a flight of stairs with the much-needed railing that rusts and peels in the flickering, damp hallway. There's the faint sound of city pop coming from the top of the stairs, through a bleak door with peeling paint. There are no other places of entry or exit, simply the one large, looming, decrepit door at the top of steep steps. Still begrudgingly silent, Kageyama starts up the stairs, feet falling hard on each step like drops of a guillotine. You follow numbly after him. What other choice is there really? Go back to the room with so many others? Die in a hallway while muffled music plays from a door? Your legs ache by the time you stand near the door. It’s not a high climb. Kageyama opens the door and you expect to hear nails on a chalkboard but are greeted by the soft melody of plastic love and the smell of cigarettes. The beeps of slot machines punctuate loud cheers and disappointments around a roulette table, the thwap of cards hitting the table and laughter at a bar does little to distract from the fact that Kageyama who had barely looked at you before — (Was it on purpose?)  — was staring directly at you. Pressing a hand to your face, you feel a drop of wetness on your cheek. A tear. You wipe it quickly and Kageyama turns away slowly. Eyes lingering a second after he turns his head.

“You’re slow, move quicker!” You nod in his direction though he’s already moving ahead again. The casino is loud and boisterous and though you’re sure it’s actually an illegal gambling den, many well known wealthies sit around a roulette table with a man in a suit, typical of a yakuza.

“You want a drink?” You expect it to come from a sleazy, older man wearing an old baggy suit, not the man who’s been leading you through this mess of tables and smoke and glitz. It’s fine, there are so many people around you.

“Why are you offering me a drink?” He’s turned to face you, still not smiling but eyebrows slightly furrowed in confusion.

“O-Oikawa said to offer women drinks. I-” Oikawa? He might not be so bad. Still, a yakuza who didn’t run with the good kind any more so-

“No thanks.” The confusion displayed earlier on his face, deepens into a frown that forms on his lips and lines that appear in between his brows.

“What, why?” He’s actually confused somehow.

“I don’t know you, you’re a yakuza - you might drug my drink - the list could go on?”

“I'm not going to drug you" He sounds angry and mutters "Just trying to be nice, fuck." And you've stopped for only one moment but the sleazy men you thought would hound you start to crowd, either unknowing or uncaring that you are in the custody of organized crime.

"Pretty lady want a drink? Got a margarita with your name on it." It's unsurprisingly a man with cigarettes' smoke on his breath and intoxication in his step. You note he's already holding the drink in question.

"No thank you-" You begin to answer, in a politely exasperated tone that you think is quite amicable for someone whose arm is practically around your waist.

"Listen - she's with me, alright?" Kageyama doesn't stop there, despite that in your opinion, he should. "She's mine." The words send a pang of anxiety straight through your spine and into your brain before they reach your feet and as they itch to step away into a crowd, another man speaks up someone much less intoxicated, still - with a drink in hand.

"She in trouble with the Daichi-Gumi then?" They're much more informed. And Kageyama nods to the asker.

"Guess he's still got his Oikawa roots then, huh?" And that doesn't make any sense at all because he's nothing like the man you talked to and who gave you a handsome wink and made small conversation.

"Don't compare me to that bastard." And instead of the usual anger, you think it's a note of exhaustion in his voice. And the conversation ends right there, "mine" being a forgotten word in the mix of much more confusing sentences. It's relatively peaceful after that, the scowl on your captors face scaring many others away. You continue down the luxurious gambling hall and into much quieter corridors with soft sounds passing through doors as you walk down a carpeted hallway, well lit and warmer. Once again, Kageyama opens a door and walks through. For a long, fleeting, whirlwind of a moment, you are alone before remembering that if you walk out without Kageyama, you run the risk of having a yakuza family hunting for you. Hell, they'd hunt your family, you've heard about what they do to screamers. Twisted fingers, bloody stomachs and scarred backs - missing eyes if the they’re lucky. You step through the open door and into the room. It's low-lit, casting a pleasant glow on the furniture.

Kageyama is already sitting down on an expensive - looking sofa no —loveseat. He picks up a remote from the side armrest and turns on a TV installed into the wall. Loud moans and the sound of flesh on flesh boom from the speakers before he switches to the sounds of shoes squeaking as they run across a floor. He pulls a nail clipper from his pocket to trim already short fingernails. There's a large bed with lights hanging above it on one side of the room, a wardrobe - open - full of thin clothing you wouldn't be caught dead in outside of your house. There's a small table, a bottle of wine and two glasses on mahogany wood, next to a singular unlit candle. Though the sound is gone you can’t help but linger on the moans that came from the TV and how Kageyama has led you into a room with such a large bed and a shower that has no door and is only walled with glass. You forcibly relax your jaw just before you speak.

"I'm here to-" You gulp down air, trying not to look at the silk sheeted bed. "Pay a debt."

"Yeah dumbass, what else would you be here for?" If he doesn't bring up any other possibility, neither will you.

"How?" The way that he instantly looks at you, blue eyes ever intense when he speaks  makes your stomach flip unpleasantly. You know exactly how. He’s led you to this room, what else could he be expecting?

"Daichi put me in charge of you, you'll do what I say." Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

"I'm not going to do what you tell me. I'll work off my debt in this casino, but I'm not doing everything you tell me to do!” Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. He blinks at you, brow once again furrowed in confusion. He puts his nail clippers down on the arm of his seat, and stands, taking off his jacket in the process. You knew it - you fucking knew it.

You shuffle backwards as quickly as possible, spine hitting the round doorknob.

You can’t go any further.

Kageyama creeps forwards, unbuttoning his shirt to reveal raging water delicately inked into the toned muscle of his right forearm, chrysanthemum petals drifting downstream from a skull at his shoulder. Down his left, where his elbow meets his forearm stands a samurai, maple leaves falling gently from the mouth of a black koi that flounders to appear just over the edge of his shoulder. On the front of his chest there is only a solitary demon - red and standing amongst black clouds which dig deep - over his nipples as the Oni stands on the cool blue with its fiery feet. He walks over to you, shirt off and tugging at his belt. With a decorated arm, he sets the white shirt on your head, careful not to touch you. What flees from your lips is a very audible sigh expressing your relief that he doesn’t seem to want to violate you.

“I’m going to take a shower. Put that away for me.” You don’t even attempt to retort as you quickly move it off your head and turn away from wherever Kageyama sounded like he was. You conveniently face towards the wardrobe and walking towards it, you notice all the clothing you had neglected to think about. Short schoolgirl uniforms, a pair of fluffy handcuffs, all sorts of exposing clothing that you think for the second time, you wouldn’t want to be caught dead in. You push sets of clothing aside to find an empty hanger, not finding one, you kneel down to check the bottom of the cabinet. You find a box full of something, flat squares that are easily torn, and one empty hanger with a leather suit that probably went on it beforehand. You instinctually turn at the sound of water hitting the tiled shower. He’s standing still, body naked through the glass and quickly you avert your eyes from him. The loud crash of falling water on the tile makes you turn, despite your knowledge of where it comes from. You can see Kageyama’s naked back through the clear glass, koi and cherry blossoms disappearing in rapidly forming fog that covers the rest of his body. Watching the glass fog with the softening sound of water on tile in the dim light of the room, a dry sob of relief releases from your throat. He isn’t going to do anything. It’s just one large scare tactic. With the realization that Kageyama is just going to unorthodox lengths to make sure you don’t run, your knees buckle and you crumple to the floor, back stable against the side of the wardrobe - and you let the tears fall.

Each bone, muscle and thought eases with the knowledge that this yakuza is just taking a shower. He’s still the good kind of yakuza - Oikawa taught him well. He just happens to be a little strange. While he showers, your face is bathed with your own free tears. Your hands cup your cheeks and you smile softly into your palms, feeling so much steadier as your breathing returns to its normal steady in and out. Picking yourself up from the carpeted floor and feeling you back crack you bring yourself in front of the TV watching as people toss a volleyball into the air. It’s awfully methodical as they toss it to each side over and over, you almost forget about the pitter-patter of water behind you. You don’t even notice as it stops and the man comes out to watch you watching the game. You barely hear the zipper on his pants - just dismissing it as some sound from the game. It’s not until he’s directly behind the couch and he asks you a question that you remember where you are.

“Where’d you put my shirt?” You turn and tilt your head to look at his dripping hair, wet pants and wetter jacket.

“It’s in the closet.”

“What?”

“It’s the only place to put a shirt.” He grumbles at your words but it’s not hostile.

“You have the bed, that’s where I normally put my stuff.” You glance at the bed again and then back to him.

“Who doesn’t use a closet?”

“Next time you’re going to put it on the bed. No point in using that shitty closet - can’t find anything in there,”

“Hopefully there won’t be a next time.” His eyes squint face lowering to yours. He blinks twice before his blues widen.

“Have you… been crying?” Your eyes must still be puffy red.

“No?” His nose is just a hairs’ width away from yours.

“You better not be lying. Lying to your Oyabun has serious consequences.” Abruptly he stands up. “And you’re mine now. You can’t lie to me.” His hair bobs as he nods and removes his dripping suit jacket. Once again the black koi  surfaces across the spanse of his muscular back.

“I’m…” You shouldn’t be asking, but he must mean this in some other way, right? “Yours?”

“Daichi told me to watch you,” He says dumbly. Well, If that’s all he means, it shouldn’t be bad. You’re going to ignore how his head turns slightly to look and that the lights that glint off his eyes menacingly. “You're part of the family now. My family” A slimy feeling crawls up your back at his words, not for the first time.

“What does that mean?”

“Talking back to your Oyabun has consequences.” It hangs over your head, his words and your next ones clashing in your mind before deciding on,

“Same can be said for thinking you’re Oyabun.” It’s a much less dangerous thing to say, now that you know you’re safe and he’s just a strange person.

“I will be Oyabun, and you’re part of my family. You already have to do what I say.” He’s scared you enough, he’s not going to do anything and you’re not even sure he can with patrons of the gambling den so near. You take a breath and steady yourself though you aren’t even nervous and without thinking-

“I’m not some part of your fucking yakuza family!” Your palm makes harsh contact on his cheek. He was just trying to scare you earlier. You turn aside as he stands still as a leaf in water. Clasping your hands together you wait trying not to think about the fact that you just slapped a yakuza. He turns slowly, wide eyes a lighter blue than you had originally thought.

“Do it again.” A large hand rubs at his red cheek. “Please?” Kageyama cocks his head to the side, hand still over his red cheek. You’re rooted to the ground, standing still, you're not going to move even if he said he wants you to hit him again.

“If you won’t do it, I will.” He removes his hand from his cheek, and makes a fist before stopping. “You had an open palm.” All four fingers of his left hand splay open as he inches towards you with confident steps. “It felt so nice to be touched by someone again.” Eyes like the Starry Night glare down while his face holds the least unsettling smile you’ve seen from him. You can’t do anything against a member of the yakuza, and the important thing about the yakuza floods back into your mind: the man with silver hair had a gun, why shouldn’t he?. You stand still as a statue, you will not flinch, you will not cry. He’s right in front of you, and you stare defiantly into his eyes as he stares right back. There is nothing to say and both of you are waiting for the first blow.

It lands.

Hard, right on your cheek and the sting is so much but so little compared to the gun that could’ve put a hole in your head. Your head is pushed to the side by force before you snap it back to look into his eyes.

“It doesn’t feel the same…” He mutters the words. “Maybe if you-”

“I’m not going to do anything you want me to.”

“Fine. I’ll try again.” And the hand connects with your cheek once again. If the first stung, the second was like a stab. Cold and sharp and the feeling staying much longer than you’d hope. Kageyama looks at you, whose face is still utterly defiant and pointed towards him. Though the red welt on your cheek is far more noticeable, he seems to be looking at your eyes.

“Shit.”  It’s a quiet utterance, but he sounds mildly put out. “It’s not gonna work unless you touch me.”

“No.”

“Either you touch me and I figure out why I get this weird pit around you. Or,” And he seems to have to think for a second about his phrasing. You think you hear a ‘can’t blow her brains out.’ “Or I give you to Oikawa.”

“Oikawa?” And you know this is a bad idea, you’re standing up to a Yakuza for fucks sake. “Oikawa just gets people to pay their protection tax. Hell, he’d clear my debt.”

“He’s the guy who has the top joint of my pinky, you don’t wanna be given to him, trust me.”

“Oikawa has a soft spot for women, he’d clear my debt and let me go.”

“He had me bring in any woman I found.” Oh. “A lot of them lived where he used to spend a lot of time. Called them prostitutes?” Oh no. “I think Oikawa would be happy to see you. Suga always says to try and make things better between our families.” He’s not going to get to you like this, you’ve seen Oikawa around - talked to him. The most harm he’d ever cause is when someone harassed a woman. Knowing this yakuza, he’s probably trying to scare you again.

“You’re lying. Oikawa helps women on the streets. I heard he even set up a safe house!” Oikawa would never do anything like what Kageyama said he would. He wouldn't!

“He called it a brothel.” He wouldn’t he wouldn’t. Oikawa always said to go to him if you needed help - he did.

“Oikawa wouldn’t do that! Not to me, not to anyone!” He wouldn’t he wouldn’t he wouldn’t.

“Shut up!” Deep unexplored, ocean blue eyes churn as the yell falls upon your ears..  

“Oikawa wouldn’t do that! He’s kind and he’s helpful!” You’re advancing so much closer to him, letting your guard fall.

“You’ll shut the fuck up if you know what’s good for you.” His hand is gathering in a fist again, skin straining against his rapidly whitening knuckles

“No I won’t! Because Oikawa would only ever take care of a woman and treat her much better! You’re making up blatant lies to ma-” The blow lands hard on your stomach, and you stumble back on shaky feet, tripping over themselves as you try to stay upright.

“He called your “Safehouse” a brothel. He kept women there, they smiled after enough time. I won’t fucking hesitate to give you to him too.” You fall over as he speaks, air being beat from your lungs as you fall flat on your back. Even while you’re gasping for breath he continues.

“The guys call it a horrible, shitty place and I don’t wanna send you to Oikawa, he’s a shitheel. But you’ve gotta fucking learn to listen - and Oikawa always made sure they did.” But Oikawa wouldn’t - he told you that you were safe with him and his people, that they were the good kind of yakuza.

“He’s not like that.” It sounds hollow to the both of you.

“Just listen to me dammit!” His large hand is tangled in your hair, threatening to beat your head into the floor. “I’m trying not to send-” The agonizing feeling of hairs being pulled from your scalp forces you to blink back tears. You yell at him again anyway.

“You just wanna see me as a prostitute!” And your voice doesn’t break but you can feel the tug of your vocal chords pulling on your eyes.

“Maybe.” It’s strange that his eyebrows furrow at your words but his grip on your hair tightens. “I wouldn’t have to threaten if you listen and touch me.”

“I shouldn’t have to if I don’t want to!” The wet tears that might’ve shed earlier are replaced with dry anger.

“It doesn’t matter what you want. Your Oyabun told you, that should be enough.” He yanks your head up by your hair, a few strands ripping right out of your scalp with a sharp pain. “Touch me.” The pain is splitting in your head, on your cheeks, in the breath that you're still trying to regain. “I said, touch me!” And he drops you. Weight held up by Kageyama comes crashing down onto the carpeted floor and you with it. He growls, sound deep in his throat as he makes another threat.

“Fuck, I’ll even give you to the Ushijimas’ to use as target practice if you aren’t obedient. How’d you like to be shot full of holes? That better than touching me?” The words come out in a harsh jumble, spilling from his mouth like a bitter wine. “Do it. Touch me before I stop being nice and kill you myself.” This time it's a kick to your back. “Then someone from your precious family will pay your debt.”  

“How do you-”

“I make it a point to know my future family members.”  He gives you an uncomfortable smile, mouth curling up as eyes don’t shift from their stoic glare. He steps even closer, hand rising once again to make you flinch but it doesn’t stop rising as he squeezes your neck harshly. “C’mon, get my hands off your neck! Pry me off of you!”

“N..” Air is fleeing your collapsing lungs, “O” It takes all the willpower in your body to fight against the muscles in your shoulders that want to lift your arm and the tendons that control your fingers to curl around his wrist and tug. Kageyama snarls as he frees your throat. His hands reach behind him and he must have a gun. He’s threatened to shoot. His hand moves so slowly, fingers curling around something behind his back. The black of his suit jacket reflects the all too bright light, cheers and beeps of the slots muffled by thick walls. The blunt pain throbbing in your face, on your stomach. The sharp intakes of breath sending stabs of pain to your lungs and the man with dark black hair and dark blue eyes keeps his hand behind his back, his left hand tugging on his suit jacket. He’s getting the gun, it’s in the back of his pants. You feel the familiar, cold prick of tears at the back of your eyes, that only intensifies as you he squats down and you flinch softly.

“C’mon,” His hand is still behind his back “Touch me.” You don’t want to die. You don’t want anyone to bear your debt. You suck in a deep breath, heavy weight forming in your chest as you reach out your hand towards his face. He inhales a tight breath, cheek twitching as your palm inches closer and closer. When just a finger finally grazes his cheek he flinches away from it and the weight inside you gets heavier. You didn’t do what he wanted. 

You fucked it up. 

You clamp your eyes shut. Slowly - what’ll he do if you move too quickly - you begin to drag your fingers from his cheek, rough with the smallest starts of stubble. He raises his hand with four fingers to keep yours on his cheek, trapping your palm against his clammy hand and rough chin. He exhales a shaky breath, his black-blue eyes closing and head nuzzling into your hand.

Softly feeding from the hand that bit.

“Thank you,” Your eyes are wide open as you stare at his features seeming so soft in comparison to his sharp, metallic anger. He murmurs softly into your palm. “It feels... nice when you touch me.” It’s such a stark contrast from the roaring, growling man threatening to force you into prostitution. The Kageyama who’s in front of you is smiling gently while his hand - though chilled and rough - is gentle against the back of your hand. It’s too much, one blink and tears start to fall. A hiccup erupts from your mouth which you shut as soon as he pokes an eye open. Whimpers based in the bottom of your sore throat start to strain against your closed mouth. His smile widens, growing into that uncomfortable smirk with lips stretched too thin.

“Fuck, you’re such a pretty crier, y’know that?” Kageyama groans the words staring at your face, still in the palm of your hand. “It makes me hard.” As if to emphasize his point, he jerks your hand downward, to the bulge in his suit pants.

“I - Kageyama I’m here to pay off a debt,”

“Yeah, you are.” He grinds his clothed hard-on into your palm. “You’re here to do whatever I tell you to. And I said-” The back of his hand brushes against your palm as it reaches to pull at the zipper of his pants. The grip around your wrist tightens as he drags your hand down. “Touch me.” and slowly your fingers curl around the length that was pulled from his pants.

“Good girl.” He snarls the words as his fingers ghost over your clothed sex, thin panties doing little to dull the strangely gentle caress of his four fingers. He pushes the fabric aside quickly and though you’re completely dry, shoves a finger into your tight cunny.

“Haven’t touched… anyone,” He groans as your hand stays deathly still on his cock. “Like this.” He thrusts his finger into you again. Beads of precum drip from his cock onto the back of your hand.

“Stop… please,” He smiles at your watery eyes. “It doesn’t feel good…” It feels like someone breaking your trust. How could you have trusted a yakuza?

“I’ll make it feel good.” He was going to leave you alone. He was going to leave you alone. A fat tear rolls down your face. Kageyama’s lips curl into another smirk as he pumps his fingers just a little faster.

“Is this what Oikawa meant when he said I’d have trouble ‘fingering’?” He says it to himself more than to you. “Cause I don’t think I’m having much trouble.” He wasn’t going to do anything. A small scream falls from your mouth as you think — you did this to yourself. You slapped him and now… Your hold on his cock tightens. You wish you could say it was in anger rather than for the sparks flying through your body. “Stop closing your eyes.” He huffs. “Makes it seem like you’re not enjoying it.”

You aren’t. You aren’t fucking enjoying it. The way he stares at you, leering at your misty eyes and dripping nose. The way he’s got his fingers stuffed inside you. The way he has your hand wrapped around his dick. It’s much easier to think this is some dream. To pretend your breath isn’t quickening or this is just some fucked up fantasy you’d never want to be real. But it is. And the gasp you let out when you feel your pussy clench - that’s real too.

“Sounds like you do. Feels like you do. Tightening around my fingers like that?” He chuckles darkly to himself before barking, “Dumb whore! Move your hand!” Immediately you release your grip on his cock.

“Not like that.” He glares at you and uses his free hand to grab your wrist once more. Harshly, he tugs it to his mouth and spits onto your palm. “Stroke my cock.” Once more, he shoves your hand down, saliva dripping from your palm to the couch and his bare legs. He hisses at the feeling of your hand, moans as you pump your fist. “Keep doing that.”  You nod, mouth parting to gasp only for tears to fall in.

“Holy shit.” His fingers curl inside you, his cock twitches harshly in your hand. His arms woven with ink, flex as his right hand curls into a fist slowly unclenching - rising. All too late, do you notice his fingers lacing themselves around your neck pushing you down, down into the cushions. You can still breathe, he’s not meaning to choke you yet. Your head is still, and that is enough, his face inching ever closer, blue eyes blown wide - mouth parting just so slightly. His face growing closer with each second that makes your brain tick with dread.

“So fuckin pretty….” He sighs quietly. “Bet your tears even taste good.” His mouth presses to yours. He wastes no time shoving his tongue inside. It’s sloppy - like you’d’ve expected, salty saliva spilling from the corners of your lips as he drags his long, rough fingers slowly from your cunt. You whine through spit and sob as the feeling of fullness is taken from you. (though you’ve felt empty this whole time) Your hips roll on their own, grazing against his knuckle. Your cunt weeps at one final touch before you're stuck humping nothing.

“You're wet enough right?” Breathless, he pulls away from your mouth, lips pink, swollen and parted, his cheeks flushed a dark shade of cherry. He looks from your eyes to his fingers to the hand around your neck. “You better be after all that crying. My pathetic little crybaby, so wet for my cock.”

You wish you could spit in his face, wish you could scream. But all that can escape your lips are soft moans, little whines at the loss of his fingers. “Please” dances on the tip of your tongue, pirouetting its way through your teeth and tapping at your lips.

“God…” His cock pokes at your entrance. “You’re so warm…” It’s hard to ignore as he presses in, pushing against your walls so firmly, warmth making your hips roll to meet his cock as it buries deeper inside you. Your hand had been moved a long time ago - or just recently, it’s hard to tell, hard to remember. Or have you already forgotten? Still coated in spit and precum, it rests on his chest, over one of his many tattoos, you slide it upwards to his shoulder. Watching as the spit leaves a trail over his body. Pretending like it’s just water. Your eyes gloss over the forced extravagance of your prison. The ceiling is in between - the sky. Some say heaven. And your sullied hand raises to pull for the sky. When was the last time you’d seen the moon. Surely only hours ago. A rough thrust and something loud echoes in the room. You can barely hear it over the dry crust on your hand. Reaching for the above as your beaten body is defiled. For a second you can feel it, the clouds of the sky.

The sky disappears too as you’re dragged back down to earth by long fingers that squeeze more harshly at your neck. Suddenly only the constricting of his fingers on your windpipe and your pussy on his fat cock are present in your mind. Pleasure and fear hazing together in your mind to create nothing more than blank sight in your eyes and sparks running from your legs to your brain. Your hands continue to tighten around his wrist, pulling harshly as he continues to squeeze and squeeze at your throat.

“You gonna cum?” He continues, picking up his pace and pushing you further into the sofa. You try to shake your head, despite the tightening in your stomach,

“No Kagey-” He looks up from where he’d been pounding into your sloppy cunt, cock shoved right against your cervix, throbbing hashly while he raises his other hand to give a harsh slap to your cheek.

“What do you call me?”

“O-o” You can barely breath and the cock inside of you is so hot. The stinging against your cheek feels so good in the fog of shallow breath and fullness that you can’t help but moan at - when he adjusts his angle and turns you around, pushing your face into the cushions and ass in the air.

“Oyabun,” You can’t help the way your voice breaks as you sob and Kageyama once again starts to move.

“Fuck I feel powerful when you cry.” If only every word didn’t make you wail even louder.

“That’s a good girl, keep crying.” You shove your face further into the cushions, tears soaking into the fabric.

“Please,” You don’t sound like yourself. You already sound broken and halfway gone. “Just cum.” Anything — fucking anything to just end this.

Kageyama just groans behind you as the nauseating pleasure continues. Balls slapping against your clit, friction building slowly as you moan through every thrust unable to keep from feeling every tiny twitch of his cock, every vein sliding against the walls of your cunt.

“Fuck fuck fuck! I want you—” He lets out a loud shaky breath as years of frustration paint your walls.

Breathing heavily with his hands planted firmly on your hips bruisingly tight, he holds you against him. Even fuller than before — with your womb filled with his cum. His hold on your hips releases so gently before he puts a hand on your ass, rubbing it softly, stopping occasionally to squeeze lightly at the flesh. You whimper softly, “Please, no more.” He ignores you, or perhaps he didn’t hear, coming off of his first orgasm. His hands find your hips once more, far gentler than before as he speaks with labored breath.

“Everyone better’ve heard you moaning.” Slowly he begins to pull out, inch after painful inch slowly exiting your sore cunt. He slaps you again, right on your ass. You’re too sore, too used to the point of breakage to cry at the pain (or is it pleasure?) “I’m your Oyabun, they better know that.” The zip of his pants coincides with the cheering for a point in the game that’s still playing. He sits next to your fucked out body on the sofa, and rubs one hand over the still sensitive part of your ass before quickly running his hand over your spine, shoulder blades and neck, settling in your hair. His fingers stay there, nails grazing gently against your scalp. His fingers linger for a minute before he pulls your body up and into his side, propping your head against his shoulder. You stare blankly ahead, eyes glazed with tears and cum dripping from your abused pussy onto the sofa. He wraps an arm around your shoulders and pulls you as close as he can, both of you breathing heavily. Kageyama seems to recover his breath quicker than you, as his slows and steadies — head falling against your crown with tiny, quiet snores coming from his chest. Half clothed, sore and exhausted you breath in the smell of the room, barely registering the feeling of cum dripping from your cunt. Hardly noticeable with the sound of snores and the feel of a body pressed against yours. Fat, raindropped tears roll down your cheeks. And instead of your wish to pull away, to leave this room — you cannot. What would happen to your family, to you? Would the man who beat you really let you pull away from him even in his sleep?

No.

So you settle into his side, raise a hand to rest over his tattoos and wait. Eyes wide open.

---

He wakes up about thirty minutes later - pats your head - dresses and runs out of the door without a word. You're too catatonic, still on the couch, still watching men play volleyball on the television. You watch him leave, tension held in your shoulders melting — unlike the candle on the table. Realistically, it's probably thirty minutes that he’s out of the room but it feels like only a few seconds. Time flies when you're having fun. He returns with a bottle of water and a bowl of something that smells wonderfully of spices and cooked pork. He sets both water and bowl on the glass coffee table. He’s gotten one spoon and he sits next to you on the sofa, pulling your legs onto his lap, jerkily giving a message to your thighs that only serves to renew tension in your body. He continues for a few seconds, delicate hands hardened with callouses knead into the flesh before abruptly stopping and leaning forward. He picks up the bowl and lifts the spoon, a small drop of liquid spills.

“I don’t know your favorite yet so I got you mine.” He waits, watching your lips tremble. Your jaw falls and even if you were to speak, you're not allowed to. He shoves the spoon in and waits for your mouth to close. He sits there for a minute. He’s staring at you again and instead of wiping a tear from your cheek, closes your mouth with a delicate touch. You begin to chew slowly, staring straight ahead of you. The sound of volleyball fills your ears and Kageyama doesn’t speak for ten whole minutes, only feeding you curry and closing your mouth when you cannot. It’s peaceful. Even as you're naked and Kageyama is shirtless again. He takes his time making you finish your meal. Only watching set after set of volleyball on the screen.

“You like volleyball?” The hand that has settled back onto your thigh rests softly - so different to the way he was beating you before - moves to where your neck meets your shoulder. “My grandfather was a coach.” One more bite and you’re done. “I think he was gonna teach me before he died.” The match on the screen ends, shifting to commentary and Kageyama opens the bottle of water. “Let me know what you like to eat, okay? I’ll make sure to get it next time.” He brings the bottle to your lips without any sudden movements and steady hands, and with his other he takes your chin and holds you in the most gentle grip you’ve ever felt. He rubs the bottom of your jaw line, easing your mouth open once more and presses his lips softly to your temple before tilting the water back.

“You’re such a pretty crier,” He pulls the bottle away and kisses the corner of your mouth, the slight stubble on his cheek grazing against your cheek. “When I’m Oyabun, I’ll make sure you’re well taken care of, okay?” He sets the plastic water bottle down and pushes your legs from his lap. He rises from the cushions only to sink between your thighs. “Just do what you’re told and I won’t have to do - this -” He presses two fingers onto the forming bruise at your stomach. “again.” He parts your sore legs. 

“So will you be my good little crybaby?”

[luna-rainbow]

Sam's EMT voice

Erm, again, because I realised so late that Sam is an actual full-fledged paramedic, I didn't pay attention to this part in my fic. But I hope this helps anyone who wants to write from Sam's POV (and takes the canon background of him being an EMT).

Healthcare people have a very...different way of engaging with the world, I think. Obviously this depends a lot on the specialty you work in - e.g. physios are likely to notice a limp, psychologists are likely to notice anxiety, speechies might notice a word finding difficulty etc.

I think if you work in any sort of trauma-related specialty, you become very injury aware and to some extent risk adverse (not always true), because firstly you mentally prep yourself about what to expect and what sort of help people might need, and secondly you've seen some terrible outcomes so you don't want to see that happen to people around you.

Let me tell you, the fact that Sam didn't lose his shit when Bucky jumped from the helicopter without a chute means he's seen Steve do this and walk it off multiple times before, because if anyone else did this in front of a medic/nurse, they're gonna get an earful and probably be grounded for life.

I've spoken about Lemar already, but the reason this post happened is here:

Electrocution with immediate loss of consciousness. There's not an EMT out there who's just going to let him lie there and assume he'll be fine, unless they're bloody confident about the electrophysiology of a super soldier heart (I'm not). A high voltage knockout like this, you're going to assume his heart has stopped until proven otherwise. (Not criticising Sam in this scenario since he couldn't get to Bucky)

See, the thing about inner voices of medics/healthcare people, especially when an action movie is involved, is that really they're doing a running tab on injuries. Sometimes it might just be "oh pffft bullet to the pelvis and she's fine but the super soldier girl gets a bullet in the same spot and dies?" but most of the time it's - oh shit, shield smashed straight to sternum with his spine on the stairs - vertebral fractures? Arrythmia? Aortic dissection? Cardiac tamponade? Haemothorax?

And you also tend to have VERY LOUD INNER VOICES when people do dumb things that has a high chance of causing injury to themselves. Like. OKAY BUCKY I KNOW YOU'RE GOOD WITH KNIVES BUT WHAT IF IT KNICKS YOUR PALM AND GIVES YOU AN INFECTION HAVE YOU HAD YOUR TETANUS SHOT IN THE LAST 10 YEARS, or WTF BUCKY WHY WOULD YOU TRY TO FLY FROM A MOVING MOTORBIKE WITHOUT WEARING A HELMET YOU ALREADY DON'T HAVE MANY BRAINCELLS TO SPEAK OF AND WHAT IF THE BIKE EXPLODES BEHIND YOU YOU'RE GOING TO GET 3RD DEGREE BURNS.

(I mean most times we suspend our disbelief when watching movies, but as a medic actually inhabiting that world there will be a lot of inner screaming)

[angloie]

Charms.

(1/?)

> Percy likes to deceive. Lie, manipulate, more lies; it was a part of his job, after all. Annabeth has been deceived. Lied to. Manipulated. She's an woman of many secrets- secrets she'd rather not let anyone know.

> Assassin! Percy x CEO! Annabeth.

> Warnings: Mostly angst + fluff, character death and some violence. Nothing too explicit. Mentions of blood/mild injuries as well as alcohol. (characters are aged up!)

pt. 2 || pt. 3 || pt. 4 || pt. 5

Percy's thumb rule was never do anything he didn't want.

To live a happy and healthy life, that was completely normal; especially for such a laid back guy like him.

Choosing this... rather wild career was something he wanted to do, willingly. Life was short, so why not make the most of it? It was getting awfully bleak with the normal civilian life. After all, no one would believe the nice young man who helped the old man carry the groceries to his car would be someone who killed for a living. A smile so bright that it could give the sun a run for its money and warm sea green eyes could hide so much more than just innocence.

The ceiling to floor windows of his penthouse showed a breathtaking view of the New York skyline, sun moving behind the tall buildings and moon replacing the orange hue. Being an assassin had its perks- despite endangering his life on multiple occasions. The pay was just out of this world. All that cash just to kill off some sleazy politician, or that one corrupt buisness man? Sign him up. Zero hesitation.

Percy frowned at the dried blood on his once pure white gloves. He was quick to peel them off. He shuddered at the unsightly view of a small stain of blood on his onyx-colored suit.

He would just buy a new one later. Small things like that didn't matter. Sure, that might've been a gift from one of his clients, but it wasn't anything he couldn't replace.

Hanging his coat on the rack beside the wide entrance, he sighed with clear tiredness. One night of forced politeness and smiles took a toll on him- Also due to the fact that he had just done his job as an assassin. It wasn't what you could call easy.

His muscles were aching and sore in all the worst places, every move throbbing with full pain. The shallow slash on his lower abdomen had soaked his shirt in a dark crimson red, most likely going to leave a bad stain. He would have to clean that later.

The penthouse was big and rather spacious. White Walls and abstract paintings lined them, reflecting off the almost pristine marble floors. It took a while for Percy to get settled in, it being a huge place and all that. But he soon made it feel like home with the help of old picture frames that held memories and the Nemo stuffed animals resting on the leather couch.

“WOOF!”

And Mrs. O'leary.

Mrs.O’leary- a huge, slobbering dog with thick black fur- bounded towards him in a frenzied greeting. She hopped up on her hind legs to lick his face, tail wagging at a unmatched speed. She barked again, this time more quieter.

“Yeah, yeah. It's nice to see you too.” Percy laughed as he tried to pull away. Once he went to the kitchen to grab a bone-shaped treat. “Who’s a good girl?” He cooed, tossing the snack in the air. Mrs.O’leary jumped up to snatch it before barking and padding away. Her tail still wagged with elation.

When Percy first moved here, it was quite nerve-racking. He'd heard that this place was an especially good spot for people like him- meaning people who did some illegal activity. Well, that was what he assumed. Percy was 99% sure that his neighbor just in the penthouse below him, (Leo was it?) had to be involved in some sketchy stuff. That creepy smile of his with a mysterious staining his shirt never meant any good. Or maybe when his other neighbor, had a odd looking duffel bag slung across his shoulder. Oddly human shaped, maybe. With a horrible smell of something rotting. Percy recalled introducing himself a Nico DiAngelo. A pretty reserved and quiet guy, usually having a frown of his face. Well, other than that time when he had his boyfriend over, a sunshiney guy with sun-kissed hair. He never got the chance to catch his name.

Wrapping a white cloth around his wound, Percy's met with a sense of familiarity. Fixing his own injuries by himself. It would bee nice to have some help once in a while, but that would mean exposing him. He's definitely not ready to risk that.

Other than his boss and a couple of really close friends, no one knows about this. Percy nearly slipped up once- when a old companion from high school came over to visit, and his small arsenal of weapons were revealed. The little compartment hidden behind a painting. Not another word wasmsaid about it. Percy made up some half-assed excuse about auditioning for a movie so they were fakes.

It didn't take much of a expert, but the were far from fakes.

His phone rang from beside Percy, making him jolt in surprise. The contact name made him smile just the tiniest bit.

"Hey, mom," Percy began. "Why'd you call?"

"Can't your mom check up on you once in a while? How are you?" Sally beamed, cheerful voice on speaker mode.

He walked over to the bathroom where he stood in the full length mirror. A hint of blood seeped through the white bandage; now full wrapped. "Good. How's Paul and Estelle doing?" He asked.

"They're doing great! Me and your step dad went out with Estelle yesterday to see the movies." Sally smiled. "Estelle is growing into such a energetic ball of energy." She joked. "Just like you."

"Is that so?" Percy laughed, splashing his face with water. It felt cool on his skin, causing tiny pricks of coldness to pop up all over.

For a while, him and Sally conversed. She told him about her day (mostly gushing about Paul and Estelle) while Percy smiled and listened. He did his best to hide the fact that he'd been fixing up his wounds in silence. He cursed silently in pain when he touched an sensitive spot on the slash.

"Percy? Are you alright?" Sally asked in concern.

"Yeah! I just... hit my elbow. Its nothing. " He hastily replied.

"Okay," Sally exclaimed in relief. "By the way, when are you going to visit your old woman? Estelle misses you, you know."

"Yeah, well tell her I miss her too." A sense of gloom over took the conversation. "Look, I'm busy now but..." Percy looked over to the mirror again. "I'll call you later. Maybe I can visit you guys over there soon." He exhaled.

"We're looking forward to it! Isn't that right,             Estelle?" Sally gave the phone to the little girl who was jumping with excitement.

"Come over soon Perce!" She garbled. It sounded like she was eating something halfway.

"I will. Talk to you later, 'Kay?"

"'Kay!"

A wave of guilt overwashed Percy as soon as he ended the call. It was killing him inside, to not be honest with them about his real job. They just thought he was a simple marine biologist who got one hell of a promotion. Yeah, he wished. That seemed easier than killing for a living. He was going to tell them sooner or later. He just had to. Not today- not anytime soon, that is.

Jolting himself out of his thoughts, Percy's phone rang. He was quick to answer it. Was it Sally calling again? Percy put down the metal spoon he was holding, letting it rest in the pot of soup bubbling on the flat stove. 

“Hey, Percy!” The horribly familiar voice rang from the other side of the line. Percy grimaced.

“What is it?” He groaned.

“Is that any way to talk to your boss?” He tsked. “But I have news for you!”

“Do tell,” Percy muttered and went back to his soup. 

“I have a mission.” Apollo grinned widely. “You up for it?”

“Again? Didn't I just do one yesterday?” Percy rolled his eyes. He was tired; completely tired. Usually the missions weren't this close together- sometimes they could be even months apart.

“Yeah, but this one won't happen for a week or so. And it ain't just the typical mission.”

“Yeah? And what's that?”

“Its a info operation. Meaning-”

“I know what that means!” Percy interjected. “Just tell me the details already. I’m hungry.”

“Jeez, okay mr. grump. Annabeth Chase. You know her?” Apollo said, scoffing at Percy's tone.

“You mean the owner of that one architecture company? What about her?” He asked.

“She’s connected with Thalia Grace and Luke Castellan.” Appolo explained. “Apparently people have been talking about their new heist that they're planning. By what I've heard, it's going to be huge.” 

Those three names- Thalia Grace, Luke Castellan, Annabeth Chase. Annabeth especially, was the most well known in the regular world. Her being the stoic founder of Athchase as well as being a crazy rich and famous person, that's a no brainer. Luke and Thalia, on the other hand, their heists were well known anywhere. Annabeth didn't have a criminal record of any sorts. That's a big reason she can keep up her reputation. It's not like the woman did anything wrong, its just that... the fact that she is connected with the two is enough to ensure suspicion. Growing rumors of her planning some of their crimes were spreading fast. Percy's heard of things like that, her being the mastermind of killing and stealing.

“Alright," He nodded. "Im interested. Go on."

“New York. That's where the three plan to meet up. Get information, maybe use your charms into getting her to trust you."

"N-new york..!?" Percy was left shocked at that.

"I've booked a flight there. 5 in the morning sharp tomorrow. I reccomend you arrive on time." Apollo chuckled.

"Yeah, whatever."

"And Percy?" He called out.

"Hm?"

"You have my full permission to kill Annabeth when you're done." Apollo darkly said, hanging up without another word. Percy rolled his eyes for the tenth time on the call.

Well, all right.

Next destination: New York.

"So, New York, huh." Annabeth swirled some of her cocktail in the glass, circling her wrist in a rotation. The blue liquid swirled together in a repetitive motion. Sapphire Martini tasted rather bitter on her tounge, but decent nonetheless. She enjoyed the slight orange twist.

"Why here of all places?" She asked.

"Its a golden opportunity, dear Annie. The Olympians only gather once in a blue moon, so we're going to make the most out of this!" Thalia sipped from her own glass, some regular red wine. She'd never had such a taste for 'Those fancy rich drinks'. Whatever that meant.

The Olympians, as Thalia said before, were a group of 12 of some of the wealthiest and prestigious people from across the world. Only a few select people could be a part- it was exclusive as to anybody who was just normal as a couple million rich. New York would be holding a auction quite soon on a famous opera house; and surprise, they would be there.

"Don't call me that." Annabeth winced at the name. "And who exactly is we?"

"Don't go all acting like you didn't agree, alright? Plus, you can gain a thing or two from all this." She grinned.

"I have a company to run, Thals, You know very well that I dropped that type of business years ago." Annabeth shook her head. "This is seriously risky."

"But you love that. Don't you?" Thalia pressed, standing up.

She truly did. The thrill, the rush of energy you couldn't get anywhere else. Thats what had driven her to join Thalia and Luke in the first place. That feeling alone made her eyes sparkle with desire.

"Yeah." Annabeth places her drinkdown back on the glass table. "I do."

Okay I'm back with some more hot garbage!!! here's my latest thing-- a assassin au. I need to do a ship other than percabeth tho 😔😔