#so like. for the first time in literally four years. i'm borrowing books from the library again

[katierosefun]

god i forgot how much i missed libraries. you mean i can read all these books for free? i can listen to all these audiobooks for free? i don't even need to pay anything to make a library card? i can print stuff here for basically free? god libraries fucking rule

[dseval]

New AU? 🤔🤔

(This drawing took several years of my life, i think. Had fun but I wasn't a pro artist, sorry color theorists)

I made a joke UTMV AU based on Blue Archive, as a joke, said joke took too many effort now to just be called a joke. Decided to post it on Tumblr because I guess I need Social Media sometimes. The AU is based off Blue Archive (heavily) and To Aru Kagaku no Railgun (loosely). Interested in this long idea dump?

Under the cut.

(logo made with the Blue Archive Logo Generator, this is also a joke name)

ArchiveVerse, or I would personally abbreviate it as ArchV or ArcV for the remaining of this post, is a UTMV AU, where all the characters are our favourite skeleton: Sans but from multiple AUs. It is heavily based off Blue Archive, borrowing a lot of concepts— and loosely from To Aru Kagaku No Railgun.

Side note, i do not actually watch To Aru, nor do I play Blue Archive anymore. So several stuff are definitely made up.

This is literally my second post ever on Tumblr.

The joke concept image that started it all...

I'm sorry for the terrible artwork sksksks

Do note ahead that this AU is made in-and-out of art block, so some information and designs are inconsistent throughout the post. Everything is also written in Comic Sans MS, as a joke.

The Academy City

Do not take this AU seriously, it's just a slice of life thing. (Unless)

The academy city is occupied with students, nobody is an adult. However there are complete facilities in the city, like malls, restaurants, etc. Some students work in these facilities, but most of the time they are ran by robots/artificial intelligence.

In the heart of the city, rests the Omega Tower, which, hypothetically, kept the city running. It is occupied by the General Student Council. The Academy City itself is shrouded in mystery.

There are four academies in the city, each with their own districts:

(Thanks to an irl friend for helping me design and clean up the logos ♡)

Each student belongs to their own unique academy, though students can be promoted and enrolled from OPS to either Ordenance or Paradigm if they possess the qualities of excellence. Students who have already been in Juvenile Containment aren't allowed enrollment in Ordenance or Paradigm.

Here are several more fun facts about the academies:

Juvie students are still allowed to go out of their district, though this depends. If the student has a light sentence and hasn't committed any heavy crimes, they're allowed to go pretty much everywhere (unless they're banned in certain locations). Any student can go in and out freely if they have a pass.

There are no teachers, the students learn from text books and videos, though they still attend class.

Even if students come from different academies, they're still allowed to visit and make friends with students from other academies.

The Omega Public School district is the largest district among all academies, and each and every student has their own house, as opposed to the other academies' dormitory system.

Only the Paradigm Academy has a standard uniform. Ordenance students have a dress code, OPS is free to wear whatever. While Juvie students must still wear the uniform of the academy they are once associated with.

Students/Characters

A list of basically every student I have somewhat designed for this AU. Each student has their own unique halo, and their own unique powers, which I have put in the sheets. It also includes a short backstory.

However, they're, uh, pretty shabby. This is the most I have designed for a joke (what the hell). Some are well-made, though i faltered around the end. So please zoom in to see text more clearly.

Friendly note that Nightmare's bones isn't covered in goop in this AU, see the very very first Illustration on top of this post to see what I mean. They also have wings. Nightmare's wings are broken and a bit ugly here and there, while Dream's wings are white and pristine. Can they fly? Take a guess.

Guys I love Reaper but I suck at drawing him Im sorry

Halo designs are not final. Also, rest assured, these three are not the only members of the GSC.

Each student has their own special power. So far, I... Literally have nothing to say about these powers, except a few things:

They can manifest from emotions. For example, when Horror is flustered, smoke can come out of the crack of his skull. Or when Dust is nervous, he gets 'cold feet,' A.K.A the ground under his feet turns to ice. Cross also has lightning fizzle out of his fingers when he's nervous or surprised.

They can channel their powers to a weapon, though it's not necessary.

Welp, that was fun. I have fun making this AU (even if it's unlikely anyone will see it). Thanks, guys, have a nice day.

Credits (please tell me if I missed anyone, or misspelled anything):

Undertale by Toby Fox

Nightmare and Dream Sans by Jokublog

Dust Sans by Ask-Dusttale blog

Killer Sans by Rahafwabas

Horror Sans by SourAppleStudios

Cross Sans by Jakei

Epic Sans by Yugogeer012

Color Sans by superyoumna

Delta Sans by AnimatedZorox

Ink Sans by Comyet/Mye bi

Error Sans and Geno by CrayonQueen/LoverofPiggies

Reaper Sans by Renrink

[gallifreyanhotfive]

Do you have any recommendations on Dr. Who books/audio format things? I haven't watched the show in a bit because Moffat wasn't my thing and I can't seem to find the old stuff. (If you have any advice on where to find that too I would be very grateful) Following your blog has been a nice reminder of why I liked the show so much. Hope you have a good day!

Aw thank you! Depending on your location, you can find classic who episodes either on BBC iPlayer or Tubi (with ads).

As for books/audios, I'll try to keep this brief as I could write an essay on this.

For books, my favorite author is Kate Orman. Orman writes wonderfully, and my personal favorite is The Year of the Intelligent Tigers. I also really liked Goth Opera, Camera Obscure, History 101, Autumn Mist, Lungbarrow, Divided Loyalties, Somewhere Never etc etc etc etc (so many more but I'm forcing myself to stop here). You can often find free versions of basically every novel (at least all I've looked for) on the internet either as pdfs or epubs or whatever. The Internet Archive is particularly useful. Some examples:

And now for the audios! I personally have sold my soul to Big Finish. I have literally hundreds of recommendations. They do have some audios for free, such as those that came from the Paul Spragg Memorial Competition. You can also find a lot of them (up until Zagreus I think) for free on Spotify. There is also almost always a killer sale going on on the website on top of that too.

As for my recommendations, it's pretty dependent on what Doctor or companion you want to listen to. They even have series centered on UNIT, Romana's Gallifrey, Benny Summerfield, and a ton of other things (including a Masterful special that just had a bunch of Masters fucking around and finding out). I'll put in some of my favorites, one for each Doctor, from what I own (which is far from everything, but I do my best).

One: The Sontarans. It was the first time the Doctor had ever encountered the Sontarans, so he was unfamiliar with them. It takes place during Dalek Master Plan, so Steven and Sara are there.

Two: Lords of the Red Planet! It's a good Ice Warrior origin story and has Jamie and Zoe in it. :)

Three: Terror of the Master. I had pre-ordered it as soon as I heard about it. Three....Delgado Master....what more do you want from an audio? It's narrated by Jon Culshaw.

Four: The Wrath of the Iceni. It was a brilliant historical with Four and Leela and Boudica. Leela gets quite a lesson in this one, first being mad at Four for not helping Boudica and then at Boudica for being cruel.

Okay now we are getting into my favorite Doctors (5-8), so these decisions are going to get difficult.

Five: The Kingmaker! Shakespeare spikes Five's drink to get him absolutely wasted to sneak on the TARDIS, the TARDIS gets hiccups as a result, leading to Peri and Erimem being separated from the Doctor. Shenanigans ensue.

Six: Doctor Who and the Pirates. Six and Evelyn have a really meaningful discussion with one of her depressed students. The third part is a musical!

Seven: The Shadow of the Scourge. Benny Ace and Seven against 8th dimensional eldritch abominations. Seven gets turned into one of these insectoids, and body horror ensues.

Eight: Oh dear I can't choose. At the moment, probably the Great War from Dark Eyes 1. Eight meets Molly and is still grieving here. He is very much doomed by the narrative.

War: The Neverwhen. Lots of the War Doctor is good if you like Time War horror, but this one has a lot of time-as-a-weapon and is well written.

Nine: Battle Scars. A nice short story about that one family Nine saved from the Titanic mentioned in the episode Rose. Has a really fantastic girl in it and a Nine dripping in PTSD.

Ten: The Time Reaver. Ten and Donna! There's this gun that basically slows down time for a single person, so that a few minutes for everyone else is centuries for them. Ten is a self sacrificing dope.

Eleven: The Geronimo boxset is the best in my opinion, but I haven't been able to listen to many of these yet.

Twelve: Another one I haven't managed to buy a lot of yet, but Dead Media is amazing. It's written to sound like a podcast with adverts and everything and is set during his time at St. Luke's. And I cried at the end.

Anyway, I'll shut up now. This was so much fun! Thank you!

[millionancientbees]

a very long list of things to be thankful for

being overly sincere is my curse but god sometimes i am just so thankful for the big and small ways people show up for me.

my friend cassidy lets me borrow their car--sometimes for weeks at a time--while they're out of town, even though I literally just hit the one year anniversary of having my license this week. it blows me away literally every time and is so incredibly kind because it means i don't have to carefully plan around my roommates to do the things i want and need to do, which always makes me feel very frustrated and trapped because i'm 29 and have never been able to just....get in the car and go without having to check with other people first. but i get to do that with their car, and it refills my tolerance and makes me feel hopeful and free. they also bought me pirate bugs to help me deal with my thrip infestation and they offered to help me replace any plants i had to get rid of, even though they were the one who gifted all of them to me in the first place and taught me how to take care of them and to trust myself to keep something alive.

my friend chris spent like six months driving 40 minutes to my house, giving me several hours of driving training, and then driving home. sometimes several times a week. they're a paramedic and have a very busy life and they still made that time for me because they knew i needed to be able to get around. and then they drove me an hour to my hometown to make me to my test because i was too nervous to test near where we live on account of having way more experience driving where i'm from. also they just?? do things?? like they went to two different places the other day to buy me a vape. and they made me a pizza and when they didn't have toppings i wanted they just...put on their shoes and went to kroger??? and got them?? i have to prepare to go to kroger for like four days and forget half of the things i wanted. i was blown away.

my friend lavender gets me a huge bag of salted cashews every time they go to whole foods because they know i'll forget to eat enough salt and protein and get dizzy if i don't have enough easy foods. they asked chris to tighten the toilet seat when i was going to be staying there for thirteen days, knowing that i don't trust most surfaces i'm sitting on and am always afraid of shifting wrong and breaking something. they took me on the first vacation i'd been on in years and specifically planned around my size and disabilities. they always want to spend time with me and are perfectly happy to just sit and listen while i talk about random shit and they think i'm a good friend and tell me all the time despite the fact that i am very hard to get ahold of and almost never respond to things.

my sister, knowing i was going to get a haircut i couldn't really afford, messaged our hairdresser and told them she was going to pay for it and didn't even tell me. she talks to me on the phone for hours at a time several times a week and texts me memes about things i like even if she doesn't know a thing about the fandom because she knows it'll make me smile. i can call her and launch into a 45 minute full detail run down of a book i'm reading and she'll just listen and crack jokes. she understands all of my references and she knows i have to get a new toothbrush every christmas or i'll cry so she always gets me one. she drives me around my own town and points out all the cool places i'd never notice on my own and then bullies me into going to them. she takes me to the art store and will spend an hour just looking at everything with me, even though we don't need art supplies and have seen everything fifty times before.

when my childhood best friend's mom found out i was having surgery she told me to call her and let her know if i wanted anything, even taco bell delivery, and she'd get it for me. sometimes i call her and she calls me her daughter (i cry every time) and she asks about my relationships and clapped when i told her i was going back to school.

my roommate asks me if i want to go with him every time he goes to the craft store because he knows i like to touch all the fabric and ogle all of the goods.

i posted a catty, passive-aggressive status the other day and when my friend found out what it was about she asked if in the future i should call her and get it out of my system or practice what i want to say to the person instead. and i was unrepentant and said sometimes i want to be mean and i meant what i said but that i was thankful that she cares about me growing as a person and living my own values and that even if i wasn't sorry this time she was right to say what she did and she said "of course, i know you'll always listen to me. I know you." she calls me while she's working on the farm and laughs with me. she once gave me a bag full of strawberry starters that were on their last legs and said "I want to see you happy" and even though the plants didn't survive I will never forget that gesture.

lake brings me food when they eat because they know i won't eat if someone doesn't remind me. they take care of my cats when i can't make it down the stairs and they watch the silly shows i want to watch just because i rarely express interest in things like that. they read my favourite book series just to be able to understand why i cared about it so much. they make me use an ice pack when i would never do so on my own and they spent two years driving me everywhere i needed to go before i got my license.

when their gramma was still alive and needed another caretaker, their mom said "I can't think of anyone I'd rather have taking care of her than Cheyenne" and she used to sit out on the porch and smoke cigarettes with me. she invited me over for the first mother's day without my mom and fed me dinner.

anderson notices when i stop responding in the group chat for more than a few days and always messages me to ask if i'm okay. they let me lead them through barnes and noble and point at all of the books i'd read and say what i liked or hated about them and watched dungeon meshi with me and cuddled me just because.

i have new friends who remind me to do my pt and care about me and send me memes and art they think i'll like. they stay up late talking about books and games with me and have helped me get two incredibly important things to manage my disabilities that i would not have been able to afford on my own.

everyone is so nice to me and i do not know what i do to deserve it. but i am very thankful and i am very known.

[lemonmeringues]

2024 Fully Booked Reading Challenge

As much as i doubt myself finishing this challenge within a year, heck imma start it anyway hahaha. I know you're supposed to read a book that fits in one of the categories every month until you've crossed everything out but let's say, my timeline's a bit erratic (case in point: it's now more than halfway through the year but I'm still on my third book BUT there's no saying how fast i'll catch up later *wink). So, here goes...

1. Book with a fictional world or place - The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis

This book is my most expensive purchase from FB to date AND was unplanned (like most good things, yeah). It took me back years ago when I borrowed a book like this from our neighbor and I was so amazed by how many more stories/chapters there are in Narnia (I only knew The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe and Prince Caspian then) and I never got to finish it cause I needed to return it so this was definitely and absolutely a smattering "healing-my-inner-child" moment, i bought it immediately off the shelf. It also made me feel like an adult after four years of being a salary-earner, you know, buying-without-looking-at-the-tag kind of thing. Yasssss. Ok. I need to calm down. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

2. Book with a first-person narrator - Happy Place by Emily Henry

Second book and I'm already coming across something over-hyped. Huhu. Tbh, I just forced myself to finish this just so I can move on to the next one. As much as i like spoilers, I hated when I already guessed the plot twist two to three chapters in. The gaslighting in this book was also superb (and not in a good way, no!). There were good self-reflective moments though but it's more of irritating to read hahaha. Good writing, bad story or I guess annoying main characters. ⭐⭐ (coz cute cover).

3. Book with a cover you can't resist - Daughter of the Moon Goddess by Sue Lynn Tan

I literally picked up this book just because I liked the cover. That's it. Didn't even take a peek at the price, hahaha. But this was soooo worth it. At first I thought I'll get exhausted reading it because of its highly detailed and descriptive writing (just as i did with the Hunger Games series) but I ended up loving it, all the melodrama...love triangle (almost became a square!)...betrayal...family duties...everything was *chef's kiss*! I also like the fact that the heroine in this story is literally a hero-badass-female-warrior and that female warriors are common in a sort of fantasy-periodic (I'd like to think it's set a long long long time ago) setting. I loved this so much I already secured the sequel book (yes, it's a duology!) thanks to my dear enabler friend hahahahahha. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

4. Book from an author you've never read before - Fairest of All by Sara Valentino (and hopefully the whole series!🤞🏻)

You have to believe me when I say that I did not intend on starting this collection. I've seen reels and "booktok" videos about Valentino's series but I paid no mind since I thought there's no way to get my hands on them except online (and I WAS trying to cut down with online shopping) BUT THEN....I saw this book in Fully Booked CdeO and this is the first book of the series incidentally. So i tried to listen to a message the world wasn't telling me --- buy the book and start hunting for the rest. What's more, this series had to be read in order and I'm currently stuck looking for the second book. But there's no turning back! ⭐⭐⭐

5. Book set before the internet age - El Filibusterismo by Jose Rizal (translated by Virgilio Almario)

I'll have to admit that this one's a wild card 'cause it fits to three categories in this reading challenge 🤭 but nothing really beats our very own J Rizz. Re-reading this at my age now and in this society we currently have, I can say there's not much difference with the perennial problems that we Filipinos face as a country. For this copy, I love that it's compact in a paperback though the pages are thin (no complaints since I paid cheap) and it's formatted just like our textbooks in high school. Nostalgic! ⭐⭐⭐

6. Book that has been adapted into screen - The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes by Suzanne Collins

The bestfriend and I were really kidding ourselves when we decided to read this book BEFORE watching the movie, hahaha. Months later, we would find ourselves with an unopened book and and unwatched movie 😅. Thankfully tackled this before the year ends! Well, in true Suzanne Collins fashion, this got me hooked when I started and frustrated at the end. I did not expect so much in one a-little-thicker-than-the-others hardbound book but lots of things happened, a mix of dragging and fast-paced plots which I'm not sure I like but I was able to finish the book anyway. I wanted this to be a light read but it definitely had some points that can pique you about human nature if you allow yourself to think deeper about it. ⭐⭐⭐

7. Book published in the Philippines - The Battle of Marawi by Criselda Yabes

This was a STRESSFUL read. I don't even know how I stumbled upon it in a section in the bookstore that I don't usually gravitate to but there it was and I picked it off the shelf instantly (not to mention to the judgmental glare of my shopping buddy/bff). This one hit so hard 'cause it literally is close to home and to my present profession. This is the only book that had me background checking the author for legitimacy. ⭐⭐⭐⭐ (can't give it five stars because of the stress i got while reading 😅)

8. Book set in or about the future - The Land of Milk and Honey by C Pam Zhang

Tbh, this is another one that I forced myself to finish just for the sake of the challenge. Oftentimes I find myself lost in the jumble of food descriptions which the author has successfully related to humanity on a deeper level. Kudos also to the author for being gifted with such extensive vocabulary but it was just too overwhelming for me. In Happy Place (book #2 on this list), it irked me that the plot twist was so predictable, but in this book I got annoyed that I couldn't figure out where we are in the story anymore. So, fickle me. Also, this book is supposed to be futuristic but it was really primal (can't think of anything else to describe it) for me, but I guess it's one of those themes wherein you'll always have to look back to be able to step forward (something like that, haha) . ⭐⭐

9. Book translated from a foreign language - Before the coffee gets cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi

For the past year as I've been hunting down the shelves of Fully Booked, this book has always been on display in the bestsellers section and I never really paid attention to it. Heck, it took a few bookstore visits before I even checked the plot at the back cover. Interesting, I thought. But never interested enough to actually add it to my cart. Now, came the time that I had to tackle this category for the reading challenge and unsurprisingly this title was among the recommendations. So finally I gave in and it really surpassed my expectations. For something so simply written (with only three chapters!), it showed me a lot of complexities in a human's way of giving love. Truly heartwarming and I love how subtle the characters are but their minds are a different universe from each other. For some reason too, this book makes me crave my favorite coffee everytime I read it 😅. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

*Apparently there's a 10-image limit per post here on tumblr so I need to have a part 2 for this post*

[bywandandsword]

Oh boy this about to be long. Sorry

OK SO, background; my maternal grandma had a stroke about a year ago and it left her unable to walk, move her right arm, and unable to speak as effectively. She's actively going to therapy for this though and the doctors are hopeful she'll be independently mobile with enough pt. Because of this, her four children (my uncle, aunt, mom, and younger aunt, here on out known as DM, MS, mom, and TS), got power of attorney so they can keep paying grandma's bills and stuff

Immediately after her stoke, she went to live with MS, since she had a larger house with a spare room, and my mom agreed to come by regulalry to help MS. What ended up actually happening is mom was spending 12-18 hour days at MS's house doing all the work and when she wasn't there MS (who is a social worker btw) and her husband would neglect and ignore grandma. So mom was like "screw this" and brought grandma to live with us. Our house is smaller but since i was moving to Maine, she was able to move into my old room and for the last year, mom has been taking care of grandma with the help of my siblings, especially my brother (PWJ). My parents have been paying for almost all of grandma's supplies and meds, been taking her to all her doctors appointments, been going back and forth with doctors and nurses and stuff, and been paying grandma's bills, partially with grandma's money and partially with their money. This whole time, they have not gotten any sort of help from mom's siblings, save an occasional pack of baby wipes or something. Seriously, my saint of a mom has been doing the work of three people to make sure grandma's needs are met. Another major factor is that grandma wanted mom to get on her bank account anyway, since 1) mom is her primary care giver, and 2) she trust mom with her money the most. They literally were required to drive to Baton Rouge to the bank and grandma had to say clearly that she wanted mom on the account for it to happen. Grandma specifically did not want MS on the account because it's known that MS has a shopping addiction and would blow all grandma's money, and MS did know that mom was being put on the account. Grandma has been telling mom the whole time to use her money to pay for her supplies and stuff, but mom feels guilty using grandma's money, so they haven't unless necessary. For further context, it's also worth noting that all of mom's siblings are all significantly more financially well off than mom and dad are

Cut to this July. I'm in town for summer break and we're told that TS is selling grandma's house, which TS bought for grandma after grandma lost her house in Katrina. Since it's in TS's husband name and has been vacant for a year, they decided to sell it and hired a realtor before telling grandma they were doing this, and again, only gave us two weeks notice. The cowards told grandma over vidchat what they were doing while the realtor was literally standing behind grandma appraising the house. Overall, a colossal dick move. So we started frantically packing up grandma's valuables and looking for her documents. We were also collect things from around the house that we thought she would want in her room at home, including a dresser, a chair, several prayer books and photo albums, and all grandma's jewelry that we could find. Professional packers were coming to pack the rest of the house but we didn't want things like my great-grandma's china to get broken. At first, MS helped us pack, but when grandma had to go to the hospital (not gonna get into it, but she's ok now and is set to be discharged next week), she and mom took turns being with her at the hospital. However, after two weeks, I had to come back to Maine and mom and PWJ were the ones able to drive me back. Shortly before we left, mom and dad came short on bills, and so borrowed a couple thousand from grandma to make ends meet and get me back home, with the plan of paying her back a little each paycheck. Mom didn't tell her siblings this, and frankly, I don't think she had to, since it's grandma's money and it was between her and grandma

However. The day after mom and PWJ left to bring me back to Maine, MS and TS went to the bank to be put on grandma's account without telling grandma or mom. They waited till mom left to do this. Somehow they found out that mom had taken some money out and, instead of calling mom to ask her about it or talk to her or anything a decent person would do, they got on the phone with DM and used their power of attorney majority to take the rest of the money out of the account, totalling more than $18,000. All without telling grandma what they were doing. Mom found out from an atm in Maine when she went to get money for gas. That's how she found out the money was gone. The first thing mom does is call my dad and then her siblings, and she's freaking out, thinking someone hacked grandma's account or something. MS, TS, and DM get on a call with mom, tell her they're the ones who took out the money, start saying they can't trust mom, bash on her for an hour about the money and grandma's house, and that this is to "teach her a lesson". As if she was a child! As if they had a right! Where the money is, we don't know, mom's siblings haven't said, but they haven't put it back in the account. Also see, not only did they steal all of grandma's money and insult my mother, they also fucked mom over, cause grandma has bills that come out automatically that mom is now also liable for. Also, the money mom needed to get home from Maine was now gone, so she was stranded until dad got paid. To add to the insult, they're acting like what they did wasn't a massive deal

DM was talking just before we left about how he was worried about mom breaking down from the stress over grandma and then he does this? He talked about how our family needed to have more open communication, but then pulls this?? TS is fresh from stealing grandma's home of 18 years from under her, a home she told grandma "would be hers as long as she wanted it" and then steals all her money too! This is a woman who can afford a $4,000 rent and regular vacations for her family of four, but she's going to begrudge mom this?? And act like nothing happened? And then MS, the most Janus faced of the three, the next day in response to message from my dad, MS accused mom of straight up being a thief, of stealing things from grandma's house, and of being a liar. Since mom couldn't leave when she planned, she wouldn't be there to pick grandma up from the hospital and my siblings just started school, so it was unclear if they would be able to pick her up, which led MS to assuming she'd be picking up grandma and taking care of her until mom got in. But the thing is, MS hasn't done an honest days work he her fucking life, and she can't lift grandma, who needs to be lifted between her wheelchair and bed/toilet/kitchen chair/whatever. BUT! MS assumed that because she doesn't tell her son about anything, mom wouldn't tell me and my siblings about anything, which is dead wrong, mom and dad don't keep secrets from us. This bitch also assumed that one or more of my siblings would just go over to her house like mom did the first couple months and take care of grandma for her. All of my siblings declined and now she's sweating, thinking she's going to have to take care of grandma all on her own, which we're letting her believe (even though the caseworker moved the day so mom could be there). When she realized this she APOLOGIZED TO MY DAD (NOT MY MOM, MY DAD) about what she said, cause I guess she hoped that dad hadn't told mom what she said yet and that it would make everything okay. In reality dad showed the messages to mom as soon as he got them. Not knowing this, that evening, MS sent a message to mom asking if they could talk, that material things aren't important, and that she loves her

Mom hasn't responded to any of her sibling's messages, and she's oscillating between hurt, sadness, and anger. I'm just angry. Mom, dad, and my siblings have agreed to cut MS, TS, and DM out of our lives as much as possible, and if they want grandma to visit for a holiday or something, they have to come get her and take care of her with out our help. This is the culmination of a pattern of behavior that's been building for years and, finally, mom is done putting up with their bullshit. Personally, it's on sight. But mom isn't ready to fight yet and I hold my tongue right now purely cause mom asked me to. But they stole from my grandmother, a woman who helped raise me. They exploited her vulnerability to try and gain control over her and take her money (and in MS's case, her jewelry, cause MS took a bunch of grandma's gold jewerly "for safe keeping" and hasn't given it back). Then they accused and insulted my mother, why they they did nothing to help over the last year. Mom has been bending over backwards to make sure grandma gets everything she needs and still guilts herself over not doing more. And the one time mom prioritizes her needs to pay the fucking bills, this is what happens?? Fuck them, fuck the high horses they rode in on. How dare they?

My good bros, since I have made it back up to Maine a week ago some Fuck Shit has happened and the only thing preventing me from venting about it rn is that my mom and little brother are here

But they leave this afternoon

[scapegrace74-blog]

Artificial Nocturne, a Metric Universe Story

A/N This is an idea I’ve had banging around in my head for quite a while, and I’ve finally got it down on paper.  It’s about Metric Jamie and Claire facing a huge test in their relationship, and how they react to it.

When I first wrote Lazy Dancer and Calculation Theme, the two ficlets that eventually became the multi-ficlet Metric Universe, I had no idea at what time they were set, beyond being modern. Since then, the Metric Universe has grown into a twenty-four (and counting!) installment beast with actual hooks into a particular point in history, so I've gone back and assigned Metric-canon-compliant timeframes to those first two stories. That's important, because this installment takes place a full three years after Jamie and Claire get together officially as a couple in No Light, No Light, and nine months after Calculation Theme, which up until now was the latest in the series, chronologically. This is a seasoned couple with a lot of water under the bridge. I have other ideas for ficlets that take place in the intervening years, but it felt important to get to this installment first.

With that said, this story is for all the readers who patiently waited for me to come back to this universe. I'm glad I didn't let you down, and I hope that you're satisfied with the result!

The entire Metric Universe, in chronological order, can be found here. 

November 6, 2021, Spittalfields, London, England

The fact that the voice on the phone wasn’t Jenny was a harbinger of disaster arriving at their door.  Claire knew the tone; had used it herself in countless conversations with loved ones.  Measured.  Clinical.  At one remove from emotional connection.  Being the recipient of such a call made her want to track down every family member she’d ever spoken to in such a way and beg their forgiveness.

Jamie slept, blissfully unaware of the anguish that awaited him on waking.  Nearing midnight, it was far too late to catch a flight or train to Scotland.  She briefly considered waiting until his alarm woke him for his early morning shift but dismissed the notion as selfish.  If their situations were reversed, she would want to know.  Pain did not lessen by being deferred, but the numbing of raw nerves took time.

He was asleep on his side, one arm curled on his pillow as though fending off a blow.  She ached for his oft-fractured innocence, longed to take him inside her flesh where nothing more could hurt him.

“Jamie, wake up,” the night’s peacefulness shattered with her words.  “There’s been an accident.”

***

Phone calls.  Internet searches for last minute flights.  Packing an overnight bag for an indeterminate trip.  She understood why Jamie rushed into burning buildings.  There was purpose in action, a conduit through which to siphon the poison of fear, the viscousness of futility.

“I’ll take an Uber tae Gatwick.  There’s no need fer ye tae miss yer shift.”

They were standing in the kitchen, both staring vacantly at the fridge as though willing it to provide further imperatives to guide their shipwrecked purpose.

“Alright,” Claire replied without truly hearing him.  “Did you remember to pack the Atkinson novel?  I promised Jenny I’d return it the next time I saw her.”

This was skirting the borders of absurdity.  Jenny’s spouse lay in an Inverness hospital, the victim of a farming accident that saw an over-turned tractor crush his body into Lallybroch’s fertile dirt.  The literal last thing on her mind was a borrowed book.

“Aye.”  Jamie opened the fridge door, peered inside, then let it swing closed again.

“Let’s go to bed,” she suggested.  “There’s nothing to be done for a few hours yet.”

“I canna sleep, Claire,” Jamie protested, following her dutifully towards their room all the same.

“I know.  Just rest your eyes.”

She slipped, fully dressed, beneath the covers.  Beside her, Jamie lay still like the effigy of some noble lord, the sharp angles of his profile limned in silver-blue streetlight.

“I am a coward,” he confessed to the ceiling, “for I dinna want tomorrow tae come.

She took his chilled hand in her own and held on tight.

***

“What are you thinking about?” she asked as shadow continents drifted along their wall.

She knew he was awake from the measured cadence of his breathing, from the tight grip he maintained on her hand.  She hadn’t expected prompt candour, however.

“How Ian helped me after the explosion.  Jenny was flailing about wi’ all the subtlety of a jack-hammer, sticking her stubborn wee heid inta everything.  I was in a terrible state, hooped up on morphine an’ feeling right sorry fer myself.  Ian jes sat by my side, night after night.  When I woke screamin’, he would use his voice tae calm me down.  When I refused tae get outta bed, he dragged me up wi’ his own two hands.  He stood in the middle of the path tae despair, and he wouldna let me get past.  Ian Murray an’ the memory of ye: those were the two ropes I used tae pull myself back onto my feet.”

Considering Jamie’s memory of her at that point consisted of a drunken encounter and half an hour keeping him from flat-lining in her emergency room, she couldn’t imagine how she’d earned equal standing with his life-long best friend.  It was a conversation best saved for another day.

“We have to believe that he’ll be okay,” she said, despising the hollowness of the words but unwilling to make empty promises.

Rather than responding, Jamie rolled into her side, burying his nose in the concavity of her neck.  She half-expected tears, but he lay still, breath ratcheting like a xylophone on each exhale.  After a time, his mouth began to move, pressing urgent moist kisses to her clavicle, nosing her shirt away so that he could reach the uppermost swell of her breast.

“It feels as though there’s a fist tight about my throat,” he muttered into her sternum.  “I canna draw a decent breath.”

“Come closer and let me breath for you, then,” she offered, raising up to peel the uppermost layer of her clothing away.

In their three or so years together, they had made love a hundred different ways: shyly, tenderly, teasing or passionate as a raging storm.  This was something new.  A desperation that hurt to witness. An unfailingly considerate lover under normal circumstances, Jamie seemed driven purely by his own base needs.  With impatient fingers, he shoved her underwear to the side, burying himself a hundred absolutions deep inside her body.  This wasn’t about sex, she understood.  He was seeking solace and succour from her at the most primitive level, chasing the tabula rasa of release.

With nerves raw as copper wire, Jamie finished within minutes.  A rough expulsion of heated breath and he crumpled towards the mattress, his weight pressing her down like lead.  She prayed he would drift to sleep and gain the temporary reprieve of oblivion, even if it meant laying crushed beneath him.   Instead he rose silently to use the washroom, coming back with a warm cloth to clean between her legs.

“I love ye, Claire,” he whispered once they were again lying side by side, waiting for the muster call of dawn.

In the days and weeks that followed, she would revisit those words and remember how they had the finality of a farewell.

***

Their flat rang with the sepulchral expectancy of an empty train station.  An independent loner since her youth, Claire nonetheless found herself filling the silence left by Jamie’s absence with inane chatter.

She spoke of her penultimate clinical rotation, and of her absolute certainty that gerontology was not the specialty for her.  She narrated her list of chores, assuring him she wasn’t over-watering their spider plant and that his mobile phone was in no danger of being cut off for late payment.  She debated the merits of various residency programs and confessed her doubts that she would be accepted to any of her top choices.

By contrast, their actual communication was brief and infrequent.  Ian’s condition was no longer life-threatening, but the doctors had to amputate his left leg above the knee where the tractor had crushed the bones beyond repair.  The surgery and post-operative rehabilitation took place in Edinburgh, forcing Jenny to chose between abandoning her husband or leaving her children and the estate in her brother's care.  Jamie’s emotional state shifted from blind terror to a weary aloofness as the long road to recovery stretched before them.  His grim mood added metaphorical distance to the physical divide already in place.

“I sure wish you were here to talk to,” she whispered to his pillow after a particularly grueling twenty-four hours.  “My life only makes sense when I see it reflected in your eyes.”

***

Upon due consideration, Jamie determined that he would sooner run into a burning building than be solely responsible for putting two children under the age of six to bed every night.  It wasn’t yet eight o’clock and his neck ached with the accumulated strain of holding his head upright.

Since arriving at Lallybroch three weeks earlier, his days had taken on a relentless sort of routine.  Mornings revolved around dressing, feeding and transporting his niece and nephew to their primary school.  Midday was reserved for the countless tasks and duties that went into the running of the estate: finishing the harvest, caring for the livestock, making minor repairs and keeping the house at least a step above squalor.  By afternoon, he was mentally and physically exhausted but there were still five hours of child-minding, meal preparation, bathing and story reading before he could collapse, nerves brittle and eyes tacky, onto the sofa where he more-often-than-not fell asleep listening to the fire crackle, a half-finished dram of whisky teetering precariously in his hand.

It was from that sofa that he leapt, realizing he had failed to pack the children’s lunches for the next day.  A cursory glance in the fridge confirmed that he had not shopped for groceries in several days.  With few nutritious options to hand, he settled for toasting sliced bread with two dabs and a smear of butter.  Despite his exhaustion, he smiled when he pictured Wee Jamie and Maggie discovering their bologna sandwiches decorated with happy faces the following day.

For the thousandth time, he considered at what juncture he would need to capitulate and accept the kindly offers of neighbours and more distant relatives to pitch in and carry part of the load.  Jenny was insistent that the bairns’ routine be upset as little as possible, considering the many inevitable adjustments they would need to make once Ian came home.  In principle, Jamie agreed.  In practice, he was holding things together with only the most tenuous of grips.

Seen through the haze of fatigue and apprehension, his life in London took on the quality of a fevered dream.  He yearned for Claire with a burning ache that migrated from his wame to the back of his throat.  Not unlike Ian’s amputated limb, he diagnosed himself with phantom pains. A vital part of his life was missing.  With time, he would adjust.  His heart would learn to beat despite its missing half.

That’s not how the cardiovascular system works, my lad.  He drifted to sleep with Claire’s voice correcting him, rounded vowels rolling about in her haughty mouth.

Insistent rapping infused his dream, translated as musket fire that startled him awake.  The mantle clock read half eleven. He briefly considered leaving whatever maniac was beating down his door at that hour to the tender mercies of the night.

Upon unbolting the door, he was greeted by a sight so inexplicably astonishing that he wondered if he was still dreaming.  Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp, face pale in the moonlight and curls as dark as peat, stood on his front step, a suitcase braced against her calf.

“Aren’t you going to invite me in?” she asked when he showed no outward reaction.  On the inside, his heart was bellowing away like a concertina.

“Aye,” he shook himself.  “Aye, I’m jes startled tae see ye, Sassenach.”

He left her heavy suitcase at the base of the stairs and turned to find her looking around the great room as though she hadn’t visited a dozen times before.  His own gaze took in the mess of toys on the floor and the half-finished glass of whisky on the table.  The fire had burned low while he’d dozed.  Hopefully the dim lighting at least hid the lines of strain on his face.

“Can I offer ye some tea?  I’m afraid there isna much tae eat, unless ye favour bologna sandwiches.”

“Tea would be nice.  I always forget how cold it gets up here at night.”

Such a statement would normally serve as the perfect opening to suggest they keep each other warm in the laird’s bed.  Instead, he fled to the kitchen, tongue thick and dry in his mouth.

It shouldn’t have been as surprising as it was to find his girlfriend at his doorstep: Claire wasn’t a woman who sat back and let change happen to her.  In all the scenarios he’d drawn of his near and distant future, however, this particular one hadn’t factored.  He wasn’t ready to have this conversation.

The perfect geisha bow of her lips crimped as she blew across the steaming mug of tea.  Across the narrow bridge of her nose were tiny nutmeg freckles that only became visible when she was tired.  It had only been three weeks.  How had he forgotten how completely and utterly besotted he was with her?  It made what he had to say that much harder.

“No’ tae sound unwelcoming, but what are ye doin’ here, Claire?”  he asked.

***

Claire saw the way Jamie was watching her like an oasis in the desert, as though she might vanish like mist as suddenly as she’d arrived.  In trying to tamp down that very evident longing, he’d overcompensated towards surliness.  It reminded her of their recent phone calls: Jamie valiantly trying not to sound overwhelmed while she listened to him grow more and more distant.  It was obvious he felt obliged to face Ian’s accident and the upheaval it brought to his family alone.  She’d given him time to come around, and when she’d grown impatient with that approach, she’d bought a one-way plane ticket to Scotland.

“I’ve come to help out,” she answered his question plainly.  “However and wherever I can.”

Jamie bristled, his face an amalgam of relief and shame.  Despite the fact he was surrounded by the evidence of his very thin hold on any semblance of control, he wasn’t going to make this easy.  Fortunately, she was more than his match when it came to stubbornness.

“What about yer studies?” he countered.  “Ye’ve jes the one clinical rotation left, and yer applications for a residency are…”

“I deferred them,” she interjected.

“…due anytime now and then the interviews and… what did ye jes say?”  Russet eyebrows raised in dual arcs of shock.

“I said I deferred them.  Hell, if Cat McInnis can miss a rotation to get a Brazilian butt lift, I can certainly take time off to support my boyfriend during a family emergency.”

“Nae, Sassenach," he shook his head adamantly.  "Ye’ve worked sae hard tae become a doctor, and I willna be the one standin’ in yer way…”

“Well, it’s a good thing it isn’t your decision, then, isn’t it?” she sniped, growing exasperated with his near monastic insistence on self-sacrifice.  Jamie was many things, but he wasn’t a monk.

“I may ne’er return to London, Claire,” Jamie confessed with the air of a man playing the last card in a very bad hand.  “Even once his rehabilitation is complete, Ian will ne’er be able tae work the farm as he once did.  I owe it tae the memory of my parents tae stay here and help Jenny any way that I can.”

“I know all those things, Jamie.  It’s why I’m here.”

“I canna ask ye tae give up yer dreams tae become a farmer’s wife!”

The words echoed through the large room, seeming to increase in volume the longer neither of them acknowledged them.  Claire waited for Jamie to recant his Freudian slip, to explain away the word’s significance by referencing his obvious exhaustion and agitation.  Instead, he sat a foot away from her, his breath soughing in great gusts, eyes shiny with anguish.

“I need to ask,” Claire spoke slowly, “which aspect of that statement you find the more impossible.  Is it the part where I don an apron and a wooden spoon?  Or the bit where we would be joined in holy matrimony?”

Beside her, Jamie let out a disbelieving huff.

“Surely ye ken I want tae marry ye,” he said, not looking directly at her.

“Given that you’ve not once, in all the time we’ve been together, mentioned that fact?  No, no I don’t ken that, Jamie.”

“I was waitin’ fer ye to finish yer schooling,” he explained as though this should have been self-evident.  “Which is what we were discussin’ before we got sidetracked…”

“Sidetracked,” Claire scoffed.  Admitting the intention to ask for her hand in less than a year’s time was a trunk line issue, as far as she was concerned.

“Aye, sidetracked,” Jamie persisted.  “Tae be sae close tae becoming a doctor, only to walk away jes because my plans have gone tae shite...” he petered off, shaking his head where it rested between his palms.

“First of all, your plans are my plans.  That’s the way this commitment thing works, as far as I can tell.  And more importantly, the last I checked, Scotland was still participating in the British medical system.  I can make arrangements to finish my last clinical rotation and complete my residency up here, when the time is right.”

Finally making eye contact, Jamie’s mouth opened and closed like a landed fish.  Generally logical above reproach, there had to be a reason that particular solution to their dilemma hadn’t occurred to him.

“What’s this really about?” she whispered, taking his hand in her own.  It was the first time they’d touched since she’d arrived, and a current of warmth flowed from his body to hers.

“I dinna want tae be a burden,” he whispered back. “T’would kill me if I ever felt ye resented me.”

Foolish man.  Foolish, obstinate, noble and flawed man.

“That’s the brutal joy and utter calamity of love, Jamie.  That we want to spare the ones we hold most dear.  But what feels like a burden to the asker, the recipient wears like a mantle of honour.  You taught me that.”

Crystal blue eyes filled with tears as he regarded her with such tender hope that she felt the back of her own throat grow tight.  Seeing the storm before it arrived, she opened her arms and allowed him to collapse into her, his sobs soaking through her cotton shirt. ��She drew her hands through his hair, stroking him like a fretful child.

“Shhhh, shhhhh, it’s alright.  I’m here.  You’re okay.  I’m here.”

Over and over again until he finally calmed.  They lay curled together on the sofa, silent save the occasional sniffle from Jamie and pop of sap from the fire.

“Did you really mean it?” she asked, trusting him to know what she meant.

Instead of answering, Jamie rose and went to the mantle, where a small box sat amongst other family keepsakes.  When he returned, he was holding a small object.

“I’ve been holding onto this since that first time ye came here, when ye asked if ye were my Lady Lallybroch.”

A delicate and intricate silver ring, warm from the heat of Jamie’s hand, was pressed into her palm.  It was her turn to weep, apparently.

“You knew you wanted to marry me way back then?” she choked out.

“Nay, Sassenach.  I kent I wanted ye tae be mine the first time I saw ye, drunk and imperious, in my local pub.”

She handed the ring back to him, her grip shaking and weak.  For a second, Jamie looked defeated, thinking she was rejecting his proposal.  Then he noticed her extended left hand.  With a long exhale he carefully placed the ring on her finger.  Something intangible and abiding slid home in her soul as well.  Looking into Jamie’s eyes, she could tell he felt the same way.  There was the two of them now, autonomous yet intertwined as surely as twin planets.

Healing kisses, breathless laughter, rapturous tears.  Sometimes all three at once.  Until Jamie interrupted their celebration with an enormous yawn.

“Sassenach, dinna think I’ve forgotten that I owe ye an orgasm,” Jamie began.

“You’ve been gone for three weeks, Fraser.  I’d say you owe me quite a few more than that,” she retorted from her spot nestled against his chest which rumbled as he chuckled.

“Fair enough.  But that only makes what I’m about tae ask all the more shocking.  Would ye mind terribly if we simply went tae sleep?  I’m ded on my feet, and I willna make love tae my fiancée fer the first time when I canna serve her properly.”

Claire rose and extended her ring-adorned hand.

“What time do Jamie and Maggie wake up in the morning?” she asked as they ascended the staircase towards the laird’s room.

“Wi’ the lark, the wee heathens.  They’re usually bangin’ on my door by six thirty.”

“I’m setting my alarm for five o’clock,” she advised as they slid into the four-poster bed, meeting with a sigh in the middle.

“I admire yer strategic thinkin’, Sassenach.  Wi’ preparedness like that, ye’ll make a braw doctor.”

Their bodies banished the air between them, two elements that yearned for each other at some molecular level.

“Sassenach?” Jamie mumbled when she thought he had already dozed off.

“Mmmm?”

“Waz’a Brazilian butt lift?”

A half-hearted kick to his shins was her answer.

“Ne’er mind,” he sighed as both hands drifted down to grasp her arse.  “Canna improve on perfection.”

And with that, he fell asleep.

[maizumis]

— HAIKYUU BOYS HAVING A TEA PARTY WITH YOUR DAUGHTER

ft. timeskip!miya atsumu, bokuto koutaro, oikawa tooru, kuroo tetsuro, iwaizumi hajime

note: female reader ‼️ watch me write about dad!haikyuu all the moments I didn't have with my own sperm donor

MIYA ATSUMU after a long day at work, you were coming home a little more late than usual and as you were opening the door with a sigh, the first thing you listen is “PEASANT, DO NOT TOUCH THE QWEEN CWON”, yeah that’s definitely your daughter and your pretty sure that the “peasant” is your, oh so-called husband. Curiosity took the best of you, now you were behind your daughter’s door listen carefully what atsumu was saying to her, “WHATYA MEANT PEASANT? I WANNA WEAR A CROWN TOO YA KNOW!” your daughter gasps in disbelieve, “daddy, mom is da queen, I’m da princess and yer the peasant! And clearly, mommy isn’t here so don’t touch her cwon!” One thing you know is that you wouldn’t like to see and hear a screaming match between the peasant and the princess in question, thinking that stepping in is the best option, you said “what’s the matter in here?”, next thing you know, your daughter with his big brown eyes that she got from her father, comes running at you, screaming “momm- I mean queen! Yeah, queen! yer just on time for the tea party, this peasant needs to learn some manners” you picked her up, enjoying the way her little arms go around your neck, “yeah? What did dada do this time?” while her face is on your neck, she tells you with a whisper “psss mom, he is not dad now, remember is tea party time” and now with her voice a little more loud she announces to you what he did “he wanted to use ya cwon!  Literally had to scream at him cause of that! Peoples this time are onbelivabol” the las part coming with a sigh, “ugh I now right? Why don’t we teach him some manners then?” After a little thinking, your daughter tells you “uh-huh! Yer right my queen, now I will leave to the bathroom and come back to continue this celebration”. While she leaves, atsumu comes at you with a back hug asking if ya really taking her side? with a low tone, so you replied with “of course I’m taking her side, she’s a child, our child in fact” atsumu looks at you with big eyes and tells you “she is right, people these times are onbelivabol but I still love you my queen”, now facing him, noses and foreheads touching each other you whisper to him “I love you to my peasant” and after a little chuckle you continue “thank you so much for this”.

 BOKUTO KOUTAROU he always had tea parties with his daughter on Mondays after his volleyball practice with the MSBY. He couldn’t go to last week's party because of an away game, and he was devasted and promised her little princess that he would get her something. Now he is coming home from the airport with three Elsa dresses, one for his precious child, the other for his precious wife, and the last one for him, it was very difficult to find one of his size cause of his beefy body, but if he promises his little girl something, he is gonna make it without a doubt. “HEY HEY HEY! GUESS WHOS HOME” he screams while putting his suitcase down “HEY HEY HEY DADDY! I MISSED YOU SO MUCH! MOMMY IS MAKING DINNER WHILE I PREPARED OUR SUPER DUPER EXTRA TEA PARTY!!” he picks her up with one arm, making his way to the kitchen to involve you in a hug with the arm he had free “we missed you, kou” snuggling into his neck, and while his arm tightens around you he replies with a soft tone “missed my two girls too, so much” he puts her daughter on the floor again and tells her “missy I have a surprise for our tea party, why don’t you finish the preparations and then mom and I are gonna go there with dinner? Sounds good?” whit a little nod she answers with “yeah dada, that sounds good”. After hearing her enter her room you ask your husband what did he get for her, and when he tells you he didn’t get one, not two but three princess dresses you’re over the moon, the fuck you’re going to do with three dresses? you don’t question him and keep cooking as if you wouldn’t have to put on a frozen show in less than half an hour. “BABY IM COMING TO YOUR ROOM WITH HOT FOOD, BE CAREFULL” the little girl sees you in all your glory, with the most beautiful Elsa dress she ever saw “MAMA, WHY YOU DIDNT TOLD ME ELSA LET YOU BORROW HER DRESS? YOU'RE SO PWETTY!” laughing a little at her comment you decide that it was the best to tell her is a secret between adults, excited to see her reaction when her dad comes to her room with the same dress on him and a little one for her. “IM COMING IN!” your husband yells and your daughter’s eyes are the bigger you ever saw them, running like the flash to steal the dress that was in his dad's hands. “Daddy, that dress is so pwetty on you, and there's one for me! We are all matching! And now we are gonna have our four curse, ugh no, cruse, ump corse, mommy how do I say it?”, “course darling, four meal course. Now dada, why don’t you come to eat with us this fancy dinner?” after nodding and making his way to the both of you, bokuto thinks he is gonna ask for another kid one of these days.

[bookwyrminspiration]

The only thing I remember from Exile is my friend borrowing it from me and never giving it back in the fifth grade.

oh a vibe. In 9th grade I lent my copy of City of Bones to a friend but then a few weeks later everything went into lockdown and I haven't seen the book since. it is hers now.

But it's fine. I haven't read the series in a long time and don't actually need it back, I just liked having the full set. I actually bought a replacement like a month ago! Yes it took me that long. But now I have the entire TMI series on my shelf again! I'm missing a lot of the other shadowhunter books but eh. I'll get around to it eventually!

but in terms of Exile, I've read it so many times that the events are essentially etched into my memory. But also I'd probably be shocked to read back through it and be missing several little details. However, I will never forget the vague annoyance as I started reading it the first time

I just thought it was like a standalone or the first book in a series and I didn't usually look into the books I grabbed off the library shelves and I hadn't figured out that I could look at the back to see if it said "Praise for [previous books]" or had literal pictures of the other books' covers

so I just sat there reading like damn this is a confusing book. Who are all these people? Bigfoot? but then I got to the "Almost a year had passed since she'd discovered she was an elf and moved to the lost cities, but she still slipped sometimes and sounded like a human" on the first page and went Something Is Missing Here. Only then did I actually look into it and discover it was a four (at the time) book series and I had book 2.

ngl this is tempting me to push up a kotlc reread on my tbr. I haven't actually constructed the tbr but it's like partially formed mentally and I'm vibing! Now that I have an inventory of all the books I own I can figure out which ones I've read and haven't read and create a systematic approach!!

[handern]

Devy this is a weird question but you're my only mutual I know who speaks French. Do you have any recommendations for french language children's books? Especially geared at like 6-10 year old readers? I'm trying to practice my language skills, but my french isn't quite good enough yet to read the book reviews. There's "adult readers", but they have a startling lack of anything at all fun in them. I want dragons and spaceships and shit, not sad people buying groceries

Oh I'm going to pull out my list of french writers books I read when I was 7/10 but I'm not sure if it's really what you're searching for?

Even when they're aimed at kids french books by french authors can have a lot of very pedantic words no one uses on a daily basis

Also keep in mind that most popular books written in english out there have probably been translated into french at some point !

Erik L'Homme :

- Le Maître des Brisants (just read book 1 and 2, the 3rd one was a mistake sorry mister Erik sir) : Steampunkish scifi, I don't remember the whole plot but it was pretty epic and I think it was about a boy coming on a spaceship for an internship? Now I need to re read it

- Le Livre des Etoiles : a young boy training to become a mage in a world that was part of ours and is still linked to ours but through a very small gate. It has celtic themes and epic fights but in a more modern way than most fantasy books

- Phaenomen : four kids in a "hospital for children with special needs" realize they have some powers while they go searching for their favorite doctor who vanished one day without a word. Kind of a modern take on changeling kids, smh it gave me a coping mechanism for ADHD and sensory overload that I still use haha

Pierre Bottero : all his series are linked somehow so here's the publication order, which is not the chronological order

- Ewilan series : a girl finds out she has the power to cross from our world to another one, and also that she's the most powerful magic user born in that world. She goes in search of her biological parents trapped somewhere in that world along with a very eclectic band of weird people. It was some of my favorite books ever.

- L'Autre : set in our world, it follows two heirs of some 7 or so families of people who can use magic, they have to learn to control their powers and I also forgot the main plot but hey the girl can turn into a panther and at some point she murders someone which was very cool of her

- Elana : following my childhood hero, Elana from the Ewilan series. It starts with her as a toddler being raised in the jungle after her parents' death (the best book) then it follows her growing up and being trained as a Marchombre (less interesting but still good) which is a thing that would take too long to explain like, they could be assassins but they're not and they could be thieves but they are not but also they're both assassins and thieves for most of them except they're not, they follow a goal way more important than just assassinations and thievery, of spiritual and physical perfection. I started practicing climbing bc of these books.

Erik L'Homme and Pierre Bottero :

- A comme Association : monsters hunting monsters (4 first books are by both of them, the rest is Erik L'Homme alone). It's pretty fun but I didn't get the end at all. But it's pretty fun yes and makes me very emotionnal bc Pierre Bottero was my favorite author and he died right after the 4th book's completion. The characters are really cool and very fun, and of course there's some monsters befriending

Serge Brussolo : each of his series has like 10000 books, I have no idea how this man writes so much but I'm pretty sure his writing rate should be illegal somehow

- the Peggy Sue series : my grandpa gave me the second book instead of the first by accident and thank goodness he did because the first book absolutely TERRIFIED ME, the rest is really kids books but the first one is horror. It tells the story of a girl who can see ghosts and they make her life miserable for it like, literally try to murder her and her family. She ends up travelling through weird places/worlds, it's pretty cool but jesus christ the first book. Warning for graphic murders, mind control and cannibalism in the first book. Some kids get almost boiled alive to be eaten in the second book but you know what? That's tame compared to the impression the first book left on me! There are sheep who eat people in the 5th book also if I recall correctly

- the Sigrid series : A girl born and raised in a weird submarine realizes that something is wrong and weird, ends up travelling through very eerie worlds where she has to learn the rules very fast to survive, it's also kind of horror-like, but less horrifying than the first Peggy Sue book. There are some spaceships, submarines, ghost boats and a lot more

Fabrice Colin : this man is a genius but also sometimes a dirty little copycat man I love him so much. He wrote a lot and not all of his books are equal in quality but when it's good it's really excellent

- Les Enfants de la Lune : set during WWII, a child who lives with his grandmother finds a letter adressed to his grandfather who died 10 years ago, he goes to the meeting to announce it to the people who wrote the letter and ends up meeting the last elves trying to leave our world before the last portal closes. It's very bittersweet and has absolutely amazing characters including a crocodile who probably ate a nazi at some point, evil pterodactyles and a mechanical kraken in the Seine. I spent 10 years hunting for a copy of this book, I would borrow it ten times a year at the local library

Eric Sanvoisin : I was absolutely obsessed w the atmosphere of his books. Horror but not scary? Kind of intriguing and creepy but in a very cosy and familiar way?

- Les buveurs d'encre : vampires but they drink books ink

- Les chasseurs d'Ombres (type in the author's name or you'll just get the Moral Instruments in the results) honestly it's been so long I don't remember much except that I harassed my parents until they bought me the book after I read it at the library. I think it has vampire-y vibes too with investigations

I also read every single book of the "Autre Mondes" collection by the Mango editor, which has really cool scifi books but there are so many it would make this list way too long so I'll just recommend "Les Abimes d'Outremer" which is about space whales being spaceships, but this collection is a goldmine if you want well wrapped together short-ish novels

[noahstayed]

Sorry if you've already answered these questions but I still want to ask them so...

1) Are you going to make another book after Earthshine?

(If the answer is yes; (and you don't have to answer this one,) Are you going to do a time skip or will you go the 'the condom broke'?)

2) Will Edward have a mate (If yes; will you create an OC or simply pluck a character from the twilight saga archives are revamp them?)

3) If you do make a version of Breaking Dawn, will it have the same premise (Ie. Wedding, Honeymoon, (I typed hUMANmoon and then corrected it, don't know why my fingers went there.) surprise pregnancy (or not? Because Carlisle is a DOCTOR) turning, then the Volturi going all "We must kill the child!"?)

4) With regards to question three, in the (honestly, and sadly, unlikely) ( completely forgot what word I was going to type, and It as too much trouble to type that so I'm just going to use another word that won't flow as well) situation (I'm so unhappy with this word, my stomach is turning something fierce, man.) that you DO go the standard "with the other book as a very, very, loose guideline) Would you go the route of OYH or would make an entirely new plot?

Also, if you do go with the same general outline, (which is unlikely since Irina isn't with Laurant in newmoon but with Charlie, so there's no bitter feelings and she won't immediately go to the kings before she's heard Carlisle's explanation.) How would you make that work?

5) I know you said that if you do make a fourth book you would just use the dhampire from OYH, Elisha, does that still reign true? Or are you planning to make a new character entirely?

6) If you do make a fourth, and go the OYH route, would you still make Elisha Emse's mate, like in OYH? Or will you go with Garette?

7) Also, since you have previously made an ff about Garette and Bella having a brother-sister type friendship would we see that and get to see Garette claim her as his sister and charlie as his father, and everyone goes along with it? (Honestly, I REALLY want this to happen, especially since I've spent the last hour scrolling through your tumbler and stumbled upon the 'I'm older than my father' post.)

8) Really, all these questions border on the main one of "is there going to be a breaking dawn/part 4-5 (depending) in your rewrite?" but if you do, would Carlisle buy Isle Bella as a honeymoon present of would that be in the oneshots book (that you'll hopefully be writing after this is over) as like a "Have fifteenth anniversary" thing?

9) Are you going to write a book full of random one-shots you couldn't fit into your story? I REALLY HOPE SO.

enthusiastically hope so. :) (that's really a tense smile with eyes SHINING with hope. Just informing you that you'll be crushing my heart. Brutally. With a stake. No pressure :) )

10) If you don't write the fourth book will we get an epilogue with the wedding five years later? Like, with Bella being SUPER nervous?

And finally, 11) (I really want a war to showcase Bella's awesome vampire powers (because you've stated (in a previous Tumblr post) that you'd give Bella her BAMF!Bella OYH powers)) So if there's a part four, even though the Volturi is "lawful" and like, has a brain, in your series, can they like have a brain fart where they go. "He's making an army," Or just straight up CANNON!Aro with his need for power be like "It's an immortal child, and it needs to be destroyed." But really be thinking, "They're growing too large, already their numbers rival our own, they must be put down! This is the perfect time!" Like the (cowardly) power-hungry and villainess we all know and love. Kinda.

I have other questions but those can really wait lol.

I basically want breaking dawn and the third (Do you count Charlie's book as part of Bella's story or as a stand-alone since you weren't really progressing the plot very much (also a very good way to have a time skip in your main)?) isn't even done yet.

I don't know if you can tell, but I've been reading this series for three days straight (new fan!) and just started your OYH series and I'm just filled with a desire right now. Like, I typically hate sex scenes in a twilight book (but that's because I was a child when these movies came out (saw them all in theatre!) and still was when I read the books, so Bella is SACRED lol, and It just makes me uncomfortable to imagine her in those positions (it's like a trauma okay?) but I really enjoyed your stories (even if I basically glossed over your sex scenes and read through them quickly) and could actually sit through your sex scenes (mostly, because it wasn't INTENSE! Like, a lot of rewrites turn breaking dawn into literal Porn and sully the books for me because they basically remove a lot of plot to make room for Bella's sudden appetite, and while, yes, you gave her an appetite and... I am just really enjoying your stories and how you write so Thank You.

Okay, I've let you know your appreciated and put out my question into the tumblr universe so now I just have to wait for you to see this and maybe respond.

I hate waiting.

I haven't gotten an ask in a while and AJKHFJKHD Listen!! THE FACE I MADE AT HOW LONG THIS IS??? Superb!! I'm honored you've taken the time to write this all out so I'm gonna try to answer you as best as I can!!

Right now I'm 100% sure that there will be a couple of Novellas/Novelettes directly after Earthshine. The Renee Story, the Charlie Story, and the Roommate Story which all will get maybe 40k and mini plots that are far more focused than Charlie's first story. Charlie's new story will be focused on his relationship with Carlisle too, so that should be fun!

Edward having a Mate is still up in the air at the moment. Since he is still very young, I don't see the need to really give him someone so quick when other characters have waited WAAAY longer. As for who it might be, that's also still up in the air in case I want to do a short story with him that's a part of a series of Novellas after the main books

If I do make a BD rewrite IT WILL have wedding/honeymoon/surprise pregnancy then it will PRETTY MUCH go off the rails from there because the Pregnancy will be VASTLY different. Carlisle is a Doctor and Bella isn't an idiot. They won't be in Washington either.

Again. The first half will be loosely based on the book and then just go completely off the rails because, Like you said, the Volturi have brains and I LOATHE an 'idiot' plot where people are required to suddenly become stupid for the story to work. As for the OYH route, I will be borrowing a couple elements from OYH but the conflict will be very different.

Elisha is baby and there's no way I could make another Dhampir at this point. Not with how much I love him.

The aging process will work differently in this fic for Dhampirs, so this question is irrelevant since Elisha will be a child for the entire fourth book. As for when he's older, Its still up in the air for this series. He deserves to be baby and I very much dislike the trope of age faster = mentally develop faster because that's BS.

We'll see, I love Bella and Garrett, but there's A LOT I'll have to cram into the last book so we'll just see.

As much as I'd love to answer this, I'm covering the honeymoon in the fourth book so you'll see what happens in there ; )

I HAVE PLANS for random one shots. I REALLY DO. I just has so little time to work on the main story so I might write some when Earthshine is done! I have a name for the one-shot collection already too and some Ideas!

I very much plan to write the fourth book you'll be fine. Bella will not be nervous, she'll be WAY more anxious about it going right. Mostly her nerves will be from anticipation and excitement because she'll be 23 and be very secure in her forever with Carlisle.

There will be a fight in book four that will not have the Volturi turning stupid. Don't worry about how.

Charlies little story is a Novella so I don't count it as a book.... GOD hearing you plowed through the series in so short a time is MIND boggling. I get people telling me this occasionally and I NEVER stop being amazed by it!

As for the sex scenes, yeah, I didn't want this to be erotic literature. I frequently scream that 'THIS ISN'T A SMUT BOOK' because them having sex is just a normal healthy thing that happens in relationships and wanted to show that. The sex scenes I write tend to be glossed over anyways so I'm glad it was readable for you. I get feeling frustrated and wanting more plot, but there are plenty of people who prefer the very explicit smut.

If sex scenes aren't your cup of tea, that's fine. I don't view Bella as pure and innocent though. It teeters dangerously on the Madonna/Whore dichotomy to act like she is. I get wanting to preserve the innocence of your childhood through her. That's not me though. Bella/Carlisle's relationship is highly sexual in nature within SoG and that's ALRIGHT too!

Thanks for the super long ask!!! it was great to read and fun to respond to!

[brw]

FOR THE WIP POST. FOUR, FIVE, FOURTEEN, AND FIFTEEN. I AM V INTERESTED.

what came first, the title or the plot? - 100% the plot. i don't think i've ever had a title come to me naturally, most of the time when writing fics i borrow from song lyrics and i do not know how to go about naming my og work in the slightest, possibly because my writing is always a frankenstein-esque mess of multiple genres and inspirations lmaooo. like? murder mystery mixed with comedy mixed with young adult mixed with sci-fi mixed with grand fantasy mixed with political commentary? how am i??? supposed to title that????

where do you draw inspiration from? - ooo loads of things! i have a tendency to latch onto the weirdest things from multiple sources of media, like sometimes i'll hear a song and a character will drop into my head, sometimes i'll read a character in a comic or a book and think "i like them, but how could they be improved to my tastes?", sometimes i'll watch a tv show and think "i like the concept but the actors execute it poorly", sometimes i'll watch a movie and really love it and want to find a way to incorporate the themes in an environment/world i like better! with this one specifically, i'd say a healthy amount of futurama, hitchhikers guide to the galaxy, the bands talking heads & arcade fire, the kingsmen movies, altered carbon on netflix, blade runner (final cut specifically), and a bunch of mixed of characters from loads of books, comics, tv shows and movies haphazardly shoved together into a pot where i just hope for the best jsnsjshsh

tell us about an upcoming scene in your wip, one your excited about - ooo! haven't written so much as thought about it and vaguely drafted it but! my werewolf character (who doesn't rlly have a set name bc i'm indecisive 😅 it will be a name with a d or a g or a b involved, that much i'm sure of) constantly gets stereotyped as being a feral, ravaging monster with no control and everyone's scared of him? but he's also got like a generalised anxiety disorder that comes out as him standing around too long or whatever or staring super intensely into people's eyes when they talk so. that doesn't help. but his teammates are literally like? stoner half elf vampire mix, a gay 19 year old sorcerer looking for his dad, his bf fae lover who would eat literal garbage if u let him, a himbo angel (like literal biblical angel) who does not know What The Fuck Is Going On at any given point in time and an alien cyborg clone they stole from the government. so like. someone will b like. low-key offensive as fuck like "do your teammates ever have to reel you in bc of your monster side, i bet you really just want to give in, the thought of meat must drive you crazy" and like. pan to this chaotic group and pan back to this actually well put together adult who basically takes a super long nap every full moon who's just. so fucking tired sjsnejeh

post a line from your wip that you've been working on - uh this is more like a small scene but uh 👉👈 here

Cadfael would have liked someone else to speak to, not, you know, someone who made his skin literally begin to melt off if he stood too close, but between crumbling to a smoking pile of dust and bones, and an awkward silence, he'd take the former.

“Do you ever think-” he started, only to be cut off by his large new crewmate.

“No. I make an effort not to”

Cadfael stared at him now, regardless of the way it made his eyes sting like they were being sliced open, and wondered if his death would be worth kissing this strange, stupid man (did angels have genders? He didn't seem to mind being called “he”, but Cadfael knew better than to assume) right on the mouth.

He thought about it a bit more, then decided that crumbling to ash while making out wasn't very sexy, and he'd probably just traumatise the poor man. And also die. Which would suck.

send me asks about my wip!

[alj4890]

Chapter 16 One of These Nights (part 1)

The Royal Romance Fan Fiction (Liam x MC*Riley) (Maxwell x OC*Amanda) (Drake x Olivia) (Hana x Rashad)

These characters are from the amazing writers of Pixelberry's Choices stories: The Royal Romance and Red Carpet Diaries. The only character of my own is Duchess Amanda Bridgerton of House St Orella. 

Masterlist of The Other Friend TRR

Chapter 16 summary: Liam, Drake, Maxwell, and Amanda meet with Sir Francis to try and get more time to finish the requirements. It has been a little over a week since Olivia's infamous ball. It is also someone's birthday.

Chapter 16 (part 1)

The four friends were waiting in Applewood Manor's study. Sir Francis was due to discuss which one would be marrying Amanda.

Amanda could sit still no longer. She began to pace before the window that looks out to the garden. "I wonder what happens now since we did not finish meeting the requirements. What if it causes us to have to accept Uncle Nicky's decision? Or the king's?"

Maxwell watches her pace, his worry multiplying with each thought she shares. He had been unable to enact his plan for the dates. Since the ball, all his spare time was used in working with Bertrand to prepare Riley for the Cornoration Ball and hopefully becoming queen. Though he was confident that Liam would pick her, it was all beginning to get to him.

Drake reached out and pulled Amanda onto the couch. "You've got to calm down. Nicholas said we had until the season was over. It won't be over until the Cornoration Ball. Stop borrowing trouble."

Sir Francis knocked and entered the study. He greeted them all and sat down. "Have you reached a decision yet? Who will elope with Lady Amanda?"

Liam cleared his throat. "Sir Francis, due to circumstances, we need more time to meet the requirements. Is that going to cause a problem."

Sir Francis shook his head. "Not at all. Lord Nicholas anticpated such and agreed that you three would have until midnight of the Cornoration Ball. As long as she is married by that time, you will still have the right to make the decision. If not, then Lord Nicholas left a letter with his choice. If none of you agree, then we must take it before King Constantine."

Maxwell breathed a sigh of relief. He still had a chance. Now he just needed the time. They all thanked Sir Francis and watched him take his leave. Once the door was shut, they turned to each other.

Liam began the discussion. "Now that we have extra time, Maxwell when are you going to complete the dates?"

Maxwell thought of all he was being forced to do. There was only one thing he wanted to do. He wanted to give Amanda actual dates. He didn't want it to be like Liam's or Drake's. He had fantasized about romancing her for years. Now that he was required to do so, it made it all the more important to him.

Drake asked what special events were going on today. Amanda rolled her eyes and started laughing. When all looked at her questionably, she pointed at Drake. "I believe you are trying to deflect attention, birthday boy."

Drake gave her a dark look. "I am not! I'm trying to see if you and Maxwell can get away tonight without Bertrand or Ryan getting in the way. Speaking of Summers, how many more times do you have to escort him?"

Amanda groaned. Since Olivia's ball, things had been tense with Ryan, Drake, and Liam. Maxwell had taken her having to stand before reporters with Ryan on her arm better than she thought he would. "After this week, he will begin filming. He won't have to do any more events."

"Good. He's been taking up too much of your time. Maxwell? Do you think you can sneak away tonight?"

"But, it's your birthday."

"Enough about my birthday! You want to make it special? Then finish the dates so we can decide and get out from under this."

Liam chuckled at the looks Maxwell and Amanda were giving Drake. "Why don't we compromise. Perhaps we can all go out. We will invite Riley and Hana. You two can then leave and have your first required date."

Maxwell and Amanda nodded their agreement. "Excellent. We shall find the ladies and make plans." Drake and Liam left the study, closing the door behind them.

Amanda and Maxwell sat there in silence. They had not spent any time together since Olivia's ball. She had to be seen with Ryan for the upcoming movie's publicity and he had to be there for Riley. The times they had snuck to each other's room had only been met in frustration. Neither had been there.They had only been able to catch glimpses of each other.

Maxwell rubbed his palms on his pants. He didn't know why he was suddenly so nervous. He had literally kissed her in front of everyone at Olivia's ball without a thought. Now that his chance was finally happening, he didn't know how to act with her. He had wanted to be with her for so long now. He had endured watching her go out with Liam, Drake, and Ryan; always wishing it was himself with her in those moments. He could not screw this up.

Amanda sat there with her hands clasped. Why was she so nervous? This was Maxwell. She wanted to be with him with everything that was within her. This had been her dream for so long. What if he realized on the date that he didn't want to be her husband? What if he did like being with her, but that he wasn't ready to marry? What if he found out his feelings for her weren't what he first thought? This was going to be a long night.

Their eyes met with uncertainty. Maxwell stood up and held out his hand to her. She took it and stood in front of him. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close to his body. They stood there staring for a few moments. He kissed her cheek and left his face close to her's. When he spoke, his lips barely brushed her own. "I would suggest you wear something you can move easily in."

"Oh? Are we going dancing?"

"Maybe. There's no point in not being prepared."

"Are we going to have conversations like this often?"

"Hmm. I do enjoy talking with you. Being this close makes it even better."

The light friction of their lips brushing against each other was starting to affect them both. Just as they were about to move into a deeper kiss, Drake walked back in. They jerked apart in surprise. "Sorry! Just wanted to let you know we will be heading out around 7 tonight."

While Maxwell went to check-in with Bertrand, Drake and Amanda went outside. "You know, I've been wondering something. Why does your uncle insist you elope? Don't you want one of those fancy weddings?"

"Uncle Nicky used to ask the same question. He had big plans for my wedding to be held on the estate. He wrote out a guest list. Had cake tastings. He even bought bridal magazines! It just all seemed too much. I told him I always thought it was romantic and exciting to be proposed to and then just run off and do it. You know you want to be together. Why wait?"

"Thank God! I have to attend enough of these things. It's good to know I won't have to dress up for yours."

"I've yet to see you dress up for any of it."

"Heh. You got me there. It will be nice to know I don't have to consider dressing up."

Up ahead, many of the nobles were walking about the grounds. Amanda noticed Olivia looking at them, then turning and walking away. "Hey Drake, did something happen between you and Olivia?"

Drake's cheeks colored. "Nothing worth mentioning."

Just as she was about to press him for more information, Liam and Riley walked up with Hana. Riley gave Drake a huge smile. "Happy Birthday! Ready for another adventure?"

Drake fought grinning at her. The more he was around Riley, the more he liked her. He still thought she was too nice. He glanced over to where Olivia had disappeared. He wished others would take a page from Riley's book.

Amanda followed his glance. "Would you like to invite anyone else?"

"No. You know I don't like making a fuss. Just please tell me we won't end up someplace with a dress code."

"You know about dress codes?"

"Of course. How could I ignore it if I didn't?"

Amanda gave him an exasperated look which he returned. Liam was trying his hardest to keep a straight face. Riley became inspired. "How about a western themed bar?"

"I heard the word, 'bar', so I know we are talking about Drake." Maxwell joined them with a grin. Drake rolled his eyes. "Sounds great, Brooks."

Hana gave a soft gasp. "Amanda, isn't that your Ryan over there?" Amanda turned to see Ryan making his way over to her. He flashed her that smile that made all his fans' knees weak.

Liam and Drake frowned. Maxwell stiffened and muttered, "He is not her anything."

"Gentleman. Ladies, don't you all look lovely today? Well, my favorite author, Thomas has arrived and wants to meet with us this evening. We could stop and have dinner on the way. I told him you were free to-"

"No. She is not free tonight. In fact, I don't believe she will have any more free evenings."

Amanda turned to Maxwell in shock. Liam and Drake looked like they wanted to cheer. Riley and Hana took a cautious step back. Amanda, attempting to be diplomatic, said, "I believe what Maxwell meant to say was that I have a previous engagement that I must keep. Perhaps we can meet with Thomas tomorrow or-"

Maxwell interrupted again. "Sorry, but with the social obligations during the day and her nights booked solid, it's impossible.

"Maxwell! Ryan I must-"

Liam jumped in, "Take our leave. Amanda is right. We must all go prepare for tonight's festivities. Please, enjoy your time here. Ladies? Shall we?" Liam took Riley and Hana by the arms and led them towards the manor.

Drake also took off. "See you two later. Summers."

Amanda turned back to Ryan. "Ryan, I will try to-"

"Goodbye Ryan." Maxwell grabbed Amanda's hand and walked away. He was trying to calm down. He led her to her room. When he turned to go to his own, she yanked him inside and shut the door. She rounded on him.

"Maxwell! What on earth happened out there? You wouldn't even allow me to speak! I was-"

Maxwell's temper snapped. "In case you didn't notice, he asked you to dinner. Again! He was taking the time I need away. He was taking you away. AGAIN! I have stood by and watched you go out with men when each time I wanted to to be that man. I've watched Ryan put his arm around you all week long. It should have been my arm! I've seen you laugh with him and smile. I am NOT going to do it anymore. It's my turn now. MY TURN!"

Maxwell pushed her against the door and kissed her. His anger gave an edge to the kiss. It was rough and he was not giving an inch. It was all Amanda could do to keep standing. She gasped when he pinned her arms above her head. He let his gaze rest on her lips. "I've waited far too long to let him get in my way." He ravaged her mouth one last time. He pulled her away from the door and turned the handle. His eyes held heat when he looked at her. "Get ready. We're going out tonight."

@fullbeaumonty @darley1101 @katurrade @cocomaxley @mynameiskaylabella

[eyesocketsandsuits]

Titles like "Distancing Yourself from Emotional Dependency"

I write things, I do.

On AO3. On FFn.

A man left work early.

Valkyrie couldn't remember his name. Steven or David or Richard. Something along those lines.

She slipped the picture out of her pocket, squinting through the drizzle, comparing back and forth. Steven or David or Richard walked quickly, head down, texting someone with one hand, carrying the umbrella with the other. It was him, and Valkyrie slipped the picture back into her jeans.

He got into his car, umbrella getting caught on the door.

Valkyrie started her motorcycle, the thrum of the engine sounding like a chest cold in the weather. Dirty puddle water splashed onto her jeans as she entered into traffic and followed behind the car.

Steven or David or Richard's car didn't speed or rush or forget to signal. He was a careful driver, all things considered. More careful than Valkyrie, hydroplaning, nearly losing control of her bike, water dripping down her helmet.

He pulled into a motel, and Valkyrie did a loop around the block, finding a spot to park.

She walked back, soaking wet, coat pulled close around her. She had left her camera in the seat of her motorcycle, but no one could tell the difference between her phone camera and the professional one, anyways.

She stepped in front of a car, waving a hand when the driver honked, and jogged into the motel carpark. There were four cars in the parking lot, and Richard or Steven or David's car was parked next to a cute buggy.

Valkyrie hurried in to the front office, teeth chattering.

The man stood next to a woman, arranging a room for a few hours with the clerk. Valkyrie wondered if she could take a picture without being noticed. The bell rang as someone else entered.

"Sure is a wet one out there, today."

Valkyrie's heart lurched.

Chris—she suddenly remembered—turned around, smiling tightly, before returning to paying for his room. The woman was a little more forgiving.

"Sure is," she said. Her tone was a little warmer with Valkyrie. "Looks like you got caught out, huh?"

Valkyrie forced a smile on her face. "Yeah. Didn't check the weather report."

"Well, miss, I have an umbrella you can borrow," Skulduggery said, sidling up. "I wouldn't want you catching a chill, would I?"

Chris touched the woman on her arm, and they left the office. Valkyrie hadn't even gotten the room number, which was the whole damn point.

Valkyrie glared at Skulduggery, but he didn't seem to notice, walking past her and to the clerk. "Good afternoon, young man. I'd like a room for, oh," he looked over his shoulder at Valkyrie, "say, two hours?"

Valkyrie blushed. She scowled harder.

Skulduggery nodded brightly. "What nice hourly rates this motel has," he said, handing the clerk his credit card.

The clerk rang Skulduggery up, handing him a key.

Valkyrie practically kicked the door open. She whirled on him. "What are you doing here?" she hissed.

Skulduggery pointed with his umbrella. "You ran in front of my car."

Valkyrie faltered—had she really not noticed the Bentley? "Regardless, I doubt you're here on business." Valkyrie licked her lip, looking around. "Have you been following me?"

Skulduggery shrugged. "I was curious as to what you were up to, nowadays, considering you refuse to pick up my calls after also refusing to work with me ever again. However, follow is a strong term. I honestly had lost you a while back, but then I nearly ran you over."

Valkyrie laughed, turning her back to him. "I can't believe this. I literally cannot believe this."

Skulduggery sounded much too happy. "You do look cold, and I did buy a room. Would you…?"

Valkyrie whipped around. Skulduggery offered her the key, and she grabbed it, stalking to the room and letting herself in.

The room was small and damp and reeked of cigarette smoke. Valkyrie pushed wet hair out of her eyes and sat on the desk—the only piece of furniture without cloth on it. Skulduggery flicked on the light and deactivated the façade.

"I always wondered what mortals thought needed investigating. A cheating husband, how mundane." He looked over at her. "Your talents are wasted working for mortals, I hope you know that."

Valkyrie glared at Skulduggery's shoes. "Yes, well, I don't pick the cases, the Sanctuary does, and no sorcerer would touch me with a fifty-foot pole."

"I would."

Valkyrie fought the smile threatening to creep across her face. "Skulduggery, I thought I told you I don't want to work with you."

Skulduggery nodded. "Ah, yes, I do believe that was our last conversation. Forgive me for having some questions, and wishing to discuss this matter further, but you really left me with no choice. I haven't worked with you in years, and I'm not about to let you go freelance."

Valkyrie didn't answer.

Skulduggery cleared his throat. "Right, well, if you could just explain to me why you don't want to be my partner any more, I'd be happy to leave you be to take pictures of your wayward husband a few rooms over."

Valkyrie frowned, and then looked up at him. "You asked China where I was, didn't you? That's why you're in London."

"You're deflecting."

"You're following me!"

Skulduggery raised his hands. "Perhaps this conversation got off on the wrong foot. I just want to know what you're thinking."

Valkyrie stood. "I'm thinking that you don't understand why I went to America in the first place. Which is—fine whatever, but I'm trying to work, and I really don't appreciate you interfering. So, if you'll excuse me…"

Skulduggery held up her phone. Valkyrie slapped her hands against her pockets.

"When you turned around," he explained, rather meekly.

"Oh my God."

"Valkyrie, I just want to know what I did wrong."

"Yeah, and you're being really annoying about it!" she yelled, forgetting she was supposed to be undercover.

Skulduggery's shoulders were slumped, and immediately Valkyrie wished she hadn't said that.

"I'm sorry," she said.

"It's perfectly alright. I was, perhaps, a bit desperate with this attempt. You're working, and you obviously don't want to talk to me, and I was being rude and invasive. I apologize." He held out her phone.

Valkyrie hesitated. She stepped forward and took her phone.

"I miss you," he said.

She looked up at him.

"I… I've tried to be understanding," he continued. "With America, and… when you didn't want to work with me. But I can't help it, I miss you. God, Valkyrie, I miss you." He was close, so close, but he didn't touch her.

"Skulduggery, I am working," she murmured, looking away.

"Yes." He adjusted the hat on his head. "I'll leave you to it, then."

He touched her elbow as he moved by her—a purely unconscious action, she knew, but it made her stomach role and twist. She blushed, staring at the ground until she heard the door shut behind her.

She let out a breath. Took another deep one; oxygen calms the heart, calms the body, parasympathetic. Skulduggery had taught her that on the phone.

…

Skulduggery handed her the tea, which Valkyrie accepted.

"God, thank you so much, they don't have this brand in America." Valkyrie took a long drink, feeling the warmth pool in her stomach. "You really don't have to fly here every time I say I need something."

"Nonsense," Skulduggery said, removing his hat and settling in his armchair. "I'm just happy to spend time with you."

This was the third time he had visited and said nothing about the books around the house. Books with long titles.

[youspoketome]

MXPX - TEENAGE POLITICS (1995)

I once bought a bright orange and navy blue Superman t-shirt in a size XL simply because it existed. It's hard to believe in this day and age, when comic book shirts are everywhere and comic book movies are breaking records every other week, but there was a time when a Superman shirt, even one with stupid colors and two sizes too big, was really exciting.

So I think that explains why I was so shocked to see Tom from MxPx wearing a Superman t-shirt on the cover of 7 Ball.

7 Ball was a magazine that covered slightly more alternative Christian music than CCM (a magazine that literally named itself "Contemporary Christian Music Magazine"). Apparently they didn't have much (read: any) budget for photoshoots though, so when they decided to put MxPx on that fateful cover, they just used an image from their newest album ON THE COVER. I took that magazine home and without even hearing them, I immediately became hugely interested in MxPx.

That summer, my dad took me to Sonshine Music Festival, a fairly large, weekend long Christian music festival in Willmar, MN. I remember the biggest draw was Petra playing on the mainstage on Friday night (I had to skip a baseball tournament in order to make it to see them), but I was also incredibly excited that MxPx was playing. By this time I had at least heard their cover of "Summer Of '69" although I can't for the life of me recall how or where. I made it a high priority to be ready for them to play, to the point that my dad and I threw a frisbee back and forth during an entire Stavesacre set, just so we'd be at the proper stage when they were finished and it was MxPx's time.

I think my dad made it halfway through the first song.

Really though, good on him for trying. He waited through that entire Stavesacre set for this band of tattooed and pierced punk rock kids to play and he gave it a go. Then he told me he was going to check out the other stages and left me to rock out on my own. Well... As much as an awkward 13-year-old who has never actually heard the band playing can rock out.

Once the set was over I was determined to buy a CD. The trouble was, as I have mentioned, I was terrible at saving money and didn't have enough cash to afford anything from their merch table. That didn't deter me though, Northwestern Bookstore had a booth set up on the Sonshine grounds where they were selling CDs. I still couldn't afford TEENAGE POLITICS, but ON THE COVER was a shorter length cover album, so it was cheaper. I could be off on the details, but I think it was $8 and I had $6. I thought for sure I'd be able to borrow $2 from my dad for a CD, but had underestimated his distaste for my new favorite band. I went home empty-handed.

That still wasn't enough to get me to give up though. Around this time I had a subscription to Breakaway Magazine (or maybe it was still my older brother's subscription then. At some point his subscription just transferred over to me.) Breakaway was a Christian magazine for teenage boys that had a couple advice columns. One of those columns focused on relationships and life, and one was more about movies and music. Every month that second column basically consisted of variations of two questions: One: "Should I listen to (insert non-Christian band here)?" (Answer: no, unless that band was Genesis. For some reason,they were ok with WE CAN'T DANCE.) And two: "My parents won't let me listen to (insert Christian band here) because they rock too hard and my parents think anything that sounds like that must be evil." The answer to this one was always essentially "have them read the lyrics, and when they see what the band is singing about, your parents will come around!" So I borrowed a copy of TEENAGE POLITICS from one of my older brother's friends and supplied my parent's with the lyric sheet.

Breakaway was wrong.

Ok, quick theology aside (it's relevant, just bear with me). In Ephesians 2:8-9 Paul writes "For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. (NASB)" Christianity is not intended to be a bunch of people following a bunch of rules, it's about having a relationship with Jesus Christ and accepting His sacrifice of His life for your sin. Yes, Christians should live in a way that will be pleasing to Him, but no amount of being good is going to get anyone into heaven. To live your life putting the emphasis on a list of things you can't do instead of on salvation through Jesus is called legalism.

My grandma had a lot of legalistic beliefs. For example, she wouldn't even play solitaire, because some people use playing cards for gambling. Which is why my parents didn't really love it when they they came across "legalistic people suck. Legalism makes me sick. I wonder what makes them tick. I want to go puke on it" in that lyric sheet.

And that dashed my hopes of buying an MxPx CD.

There were multiple repercussions to this ruling. First, I very much learned the wrong lesson from all this. I had gone through all the proper channels (learned of a band in a Christian magazine, saw them at a Christian music festival, followed a different Christian magazine's advice for winning parents over) and was still shot down. So shortly after this when I was at my friend Matt's house and he showed me a new band called Green Day who sounded "exactly like MxPx," I decided to skip the getting approval step altogether (Breakaway would eventually cover Green Day in one of those "don't listen to this non-Christian band" columns). I had another friend dub me a copy of DOOKIE onto a cassette and I listened to it strictly on headphones.

Secondly, I was introduced to Tooth & Nail Records. Perusing that Northwestern Bookstore booth at Sonshine was also my first exposure to Ghoti Hook, whose first album SUMO SURPRISE would end up being one of my next CD purchases. Shortly after that I obtained a T&N mail order catalogue, which I would go over and over and over again. Crux's FAILURE TO YIELD, Blenderhead's PRIME CANDIDATE FOR BURNOUT, TOOTH AND NAIL ROCK SAMPLER VOL. 1, and I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN VOL. 1, all T&N releases, were my next four purchases after that. Somewhere in there I also got a VHS tape of Tooth & Nail music videos. Up until this point, I was looking for that Forefront Records spine, but my brand loyalty changed allegiances to Tooth & Nail almost immediately. And would stay there for another 10-15 years.

I never would buy TEENAGE POLITICS. The two CDs I bought in between Ian and Ghoti Hook were NEVER SAY DINOSAUR, a tribute to Petra that featured your usual CCM bands like Audio Adrenaline and Jars of Clay, but also featured a cover by MxPx, and SELTZER, another CCM compilation that MxPx got thrown into. They were also featured on that music video compilation and I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN, so I snuck them in where I could. At some point in the next two years my cousin ended up with a copy of TEENAGE POLITICS, and was more interested in my copy of Geoff Moore and the Distance's HOMERUN. By that point I had already almost entirely abandoned my pre-T&N CD collection so it was a no brainier to make that trade. I think it ended up being one of those rare win/win trades. I think he still breaks out the Geoff Moore from time to time and TEENAGE POLITICS is still my favorite MxPx album to this day.