#so it’s basically fate because i’m deeming it so

[maebyshifting]

i just realized that i’ve never told anyone why harry hook is my s/o in my descendants dr :D it’s a fun little story!

when i was originally scripting my descendants dr, i was going to shift for jay. i loved his personality throughout the movies and thought we’d mesh really well. then i had a dream where harry was in it. and i couldn’t get it out of my head. so i guess it would be fate? which matches with my dr hehe

[helaintoloki]

the other Hargreeves siblings being absolutely teary-eyed on the day of y/n and Five’s wedding. they like to think of her as an adopted member of the family, because she’s gone through so much with them, gotten so close to death in multiple occasions while trying to save them. after everything, they never thought to see her live out the happy life she deserve, much less getting married to Five.

a/n: i am a sucker for found family tropes and wedding pieces so this was fun for me to write

warnings: none i think ? mostly fluff

Your stomach feels as if it’s tied into a million knots, and you can’t bring yourself to even touch the plate of fruit Klaus had fetched for you to nibble on as you got ready for the big day. Allison works diligently to perfect your look despite her insistence that you should have just let her hire a professional to get the job done, but you were adamant about keeping everything as simple as possible. Neither you nor Five wanted some big extravagant mess when it came to your ceremony, and if it had been up to you both you would have just settled for a courthouse marriage, but his family wouldn’t have it. You were finally becoming an official Hargreeves, and they deemed it necessary to celebrate with a proper wedding and reception despite the fact that there really would only be about ten guests at most.

You met Five in the apocalyptic ruins of the world while scavenging for food. Despite everyone you knew and cared about perishing in the gale of fire that blanketed the earth, you had miraculously survived. Call it pure luck for being at the right place at the right time, but you had been searching for a flashlight in your underground basement when the moon had been struck, and the reinforced steel structure of the room had kept you from suffering the same fate as everyone around you.

Neither of you trusted each other in the beginning, but you both were smart enough to realize that sticking together was necessary for your survival, and so you put aside your differences to travel the apocalyptic wasteland together. That’s not to say there weren’t times when you got on each others nerves or wanted to strangle him with your bare hands, but with time your partnership evolved into an actual friendship, and perhaps it could have evolved into more if not for the constant distractions that arose during your fight for survival.

Allison accidentally poking your eye with a mascara wand interrupts your moment of reminiscing, and she merely gives you an apologetic smile when you shoot her a look of annoyance in return.

“I told you we should have hired a professional,” she reminds you matter of factly only for you to lightly swat her hand away.

“And I told you I wanted to go down to the courthouse and pick up a sheet cake at the grocery store,” you counter with a raised brow. Sensing defeat, Allison relents with a small sigh and takes a step back to look at her masterpiece.

“You’re right, I’m sorry. It’s just our family doesn’t get to do these sorts of things very often, and it’s not every day I get a new sister.”

Your shoulders slump guilty at her admission, and you find yourself now feeling less combative against her than you initially were. Though you mentally are in your 50’s and no longer see a need to have a big wedding to marry a man you’ve known for basically your whole life, you still physically look like a young bride, so it’s only natural for Allison and the rest of Five’s siblings to want to treat you as such. From what Five has told you along with the stories that have been recounted in your presence, their lives have always been less than normal. You of all people can relate to that- growing up in an apocalypse, becoming a glorified secretary for a time-ordinance bureau while your only friend is out on assignments, risking your life to save the world, ending multiple apocalypses. The list could go on forever. They’re only trying to experience normal family milestones, so who are you to get in the way of that.

“No, I’m sorry,” you relent with a remorseful sigh. “I know you’re just trying to be nice, and I’m grateful for how quickly you and your siblings have welcomed me into the family despite how unconventional this all is. I really appreciate it.”

“Good, I’m glad you see it my way,” Allison teases playfully before finishing up the final touches on her masterpiece.

“Knock, knock,” Klaus singsongs from outside your dressing room before letting himself in. Proudly holding up the plastic wrap bag from its hanger, he announces, “Here I am with the dress, and as promised, nothing happened to it under my watch.���

“Thank you, Klaus,” you smile gratefully only for him to return the gesture with an affectionate pinch of your cheek.

“No need to thank me, sweetheart. I’m just so excited to finally have a little sister!”

“You know I’m technically older than you right?” You retort with a raised brow only for him to press a finger to your lips.

“Shh, don’t ruin this for me,” he gently corrects you before pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. You don’t miss the way his eyes begin to water at the sight of you with your hair and makeup done, but you’re kind enough not to point it out. Klaus had been the easiest of Five’s siblings to warm up to, always treating you like one of his own and roping you into his mischief despite your fiancé’s protests. The Seance couldn’t even count on one hand how many times you had been there to lend a shoulder for him to cry on when his addiction became too much or offer a supportive hand when his siblings had been less than eager to do so. He adored you, and he could nearly burst with pride at finally being able to call himself your brother.

“Alright, we have thirty minutes left to get you into that dress and down that isle,” Allison announces with a determined clap of her hands before snatching the dress from Klaus. “Are you ready to officially become Mrs. Hargreeves?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” you announce with a resigned sigh before immediately being pulled every which way by the two siblings to finish your ensamble.

You can’t wait to get this over with.

~~~

“You nervous?” Viktor whispers with a gentle nudge to Five’s side. Quiet chatter drifts through the air as the handful of guests that are present make conversation to pass the time before the ceremony begins. Neither of you exactly have big families; Five has only ever had his siblings, and your family isn’t exactly supportive of your choice of groom. It’s an intimate affair, but you both prefer it that way.

“Hardly,” he scoffs indignantly, though his need to readjust his tie for the millionth time says otherwise. Five knows that this probably should have happened sooner and promoting you from his partner to his wife has been long overdue. He was honestly surprised you had said yes when he’d finally bit the bullet and asked the question. He loved you, cared for you in a way he never thought possible and in a way that honestly wasn’t quite like him. But you were different, and he hadn’t risked it all trying to end multiple apocalypses just to not marry you once the world was finally safe.

“I’m glad you’re happy, we all are,” his brother notes with a kind smile. “She’s good for you, and she’ll be a good addition to the family.”

Five can’t argue with that. It honestly pains him to think about just how many times you’ve thrown your own life on the line for not just him but his siblings as well. You’ve been there for them even when it wasn’t your responsibility, when they technically weren’t your family yet, even when Five himself wasn’t the best brother to them all. While Five could at times be brash or crude, you were patient and understanding, and this balance helped make their team stronger. You’d make a fine Hargreeves; he wouldn’t be standing here today if that weren’t the case.

Behind the wooden double doors you nervously readjust your veil as you wait for your cue to enter the room. Diego holds your bouquet patiently on your left while Luther fluffs out the skirt of your dress for you on your right. Having no real family present for your big day, you were left without anyone to give you away to your new husband. Diego and Luther had both been eager to throw themselves at the chance to be at your side down the aisle, constantly at each other’s necks arguing over who deserved the right more. Of course, as the bride it was you who got the final say, and the choice couldn’t have been more obvious. You picked them both.

Both men had been put through a lot by your fiancé, from having to carry his drunken form out of a library to dealing with his fits of rage at their inability to meet his deadlines for important tasks, but they had always been kind to you despite the unorthodox nature of your relationship with their brother. Luther had taken several bullets for you before, and Diego hadn’t shied away from being a supportive shoulder to cry on whenever you and Five couldn’t see eye-to-eye. It would feel wrong not to have them both by your side, and they were honored.

“You scared?” Diego questions after noticing your tight grip on his bicep when the music begins. He has to hold back a wince from the way your manicured nails dig into his arm and distracts himself by handing you your bouquet.

“A little,” you answer honestly, harshly swallowing down your nerves when Luther opens the doors for you to walk through.

“You’ve got this,” Diego encourages after pressing a chaste kiss to your temple. “If anyone is brave enough to marry my brother, it’s you.”

“Brave or maybe a little insane,” Luther adds under his breath.

You can’t help the small huff of air that pushes past your lips in response to his quip, but you’re given no time to respond as your soon-to-be brother-in-laws escort you to your awaiting husband.

No one can deny how absolutely breath taking you look in your elegantly simple wedding gown, your smile nervous as you make your way towards Five who looks so handsome in his perfectly tailored suit. All day you’ve wanted nothing more than to see him, but now that you’re here you find yourself full of nerves and anxiety.

Luther and Diego give you away at the end of the isle (not without sternly warning Five to take good care of their new sister), and you finally find yourself face-to-face with the man you’ve loved for years.

“You ready for this?” He whispers under his breath as Viktor begins his officiant speech, subtly reaching for your hand to give it a reassuring squeeze.

“This won’t be the worst thing we’ve done together,” you note cheekily with a shrug as you hide your smile behind your bouquet, and Five can’t argue with that.

Though his siblings have been better at showing their excitement for this day than you or Five combined, you’d be lying if you said you weren’t happy to finally be marrying the boy who had been by your side through thick and thin, good and bad, and life and death. Perhaps your love story was a bit unconventional, but unconventionality is a Hargreeves speciality.

You’re going to fit right in.

[chameleonwritess]

Incoming essay about Yuzuru Fushimi and why I believe he is the least normal Ensemble Stars character

Before we begin, I’d like to thank @normalestenstars both for giving me the motivation to actually write this at last, and for the polls that have allowed me to ponder over the normality of each enstars character, along with how normality would even be gauged. I’m aware that the concept will have differed from person to person, and so I’ll attempt to explain my metric of normality in order to explain why, say, Kanata, Wataru, or HiMERU aren’t my ‘least normal’ character (okay, what is it with blue hair and insanity in enstars, bc Tatsumi is kinda making the most insane list too). I'll also put the essay under the cut because... it got long. But if you wanna learn about Yuzuru, you came to the right place!

I was judging normality to be a combination of life experiences through from childhood to adulthood, behaviour, current responsibilities and activities, ways of reacting to situations, ways of interacting with the world, mental headspace and its subsequent projections, and any juxtapositions between those- particularly with regards to internal and external worlds of a character (this might not make any sense… it made sense to me but I’m hardly a most normal character myself).

First up, as Kanata was dubbed the audience voted least normal, I’ll touch  briefly on which specific aspect differed here between Kanata and Yuzuru that made me choose Yuzuru over Kanata. Both by the general audience and by the characters within the world of Ensemble Stars, Kanata is perceived as weird and strange, and his backstory explains that weirdness very well… perfectly well, basically. Of course he’s weird and outlandish given he grew up believing he was a living god. Meanwhile, Yuzuru is deemed as pretty normal by both characters and the general audience. At least on the surface! The amount of enstars fans I’ve heard call Yuzuru boring just confirms this, really. Who would ever dream of calling Kanata boring? But the characters who know Yuzuru better, or for those who finally get to interact with him more than very surface level, they suddenly uncover that oh shit hang on this guy is TERRIFYING and INSANE and what the actual FUCK IS GOING ON??? (See: Resort Live when Adonis is in the water and when Yuzuru dives to fetch him he felt like he was being followed by a wild carnivore and was confused as to how the hell Yuzuru had hidden that kind of aura up until now). Love how I said brief and then reached this length BUT essentially it’s the juxtaposition of Yuzuru’s external perception versus his actual reality that puts him on top of the weirdness ladder for me. Kanata’s weirdness is very in line with his history, giving him an aspect of normality, or at least expectedness, in my opinion (I’m in no way denying that Kanata is NOT NORMAL, though, don’t worry. My only actual denial of any not normal allocations is Wataru… but we’ll get to that in another essay xoxo)

RIGHT now let’s start with the Yuzuru focus. We’re gonna go back to his past to begin with. And no, I don’t mean the military camp, actually (although the very fact I just said those words should hopefully be clueing you in to Yuzuru’s abnormality). I’ll leave a list at the end of this of all the stories I got my facts from, as well as some key Yuzuru focussed readings if you want to learn more hehe. Saying that, I talk about Yuzuru’s past pre-military because it starts off as a wild backstory even before we get to the slightly more unhinged stuff. He was born into a family of butlers, and thus was fated to work for the Himemiyas and serve them… WHAT???? Yuzuru’s family are essentially slaves, and we know next to nothing about his parents. So many enstars characters are highlighted for having abusive families as an aspect of their abnormality and the weirdness with which they were raised, but yuzuru never gets brought up amongst those. How does this scenario even happen in the modern world???? I am SO CONFUSED and we have basically no answers. Does Yuzuru get paid?????? He’s been a butler since he was BORN so… probably not?? Is he essentially a slave???????? I suspect maybe!! We already know the Himemiyas are NOT EXACTLY THE EPITOME OF MORAL CORRECTNESS (see: they run an orphanage that filters into a fucking military training facility) so I would not put it past them. So- backstory and utter weird environment to be raised in? CHECK!!!! Yuzuru might have been raised in the weirdest environment out of all enstars characters except perhaps Kanata. Or joint weirdest WITH Kanata!! He grew up being trained to be perfect and to be entirely subservient. He had no interaction with peers, no downtime, doesn’t even have his own house given he lives at the Himemiya’s mansion. It’s absolutely insane if you stop and think about it for more than five seconds, and no one ever seems to talk about it??? Yuzuru Fushimi, man.

And we don’t know much about Yuzuru during this time (probably for good reason- he is cagey about anything that makes it look like he doesn’t enjoy his role and boy does this time include those feelings!), but we do know from Tori that he was not naturally talented at being a butler, would make loads of mistakes, and would hide in the shadows and cry over it. Yuzuru was just a KID. He’s only one year older than Tori, but he was expected to perfectly master pretty much every skill ever. He’s way too over-competent at seemingly everything, and as easy as that is to attribute to the military training…. a lot of stuff doesn’t make sense for that. He was trained to do e v e r y t h i n g. Child abuse, yay!! That’s essentially what it is when you think about it!! Were his parents trapped like this too?? How did his parents meet?? Are they the ones trapping him in this role, or is it the Himemiyas??? Because Yuzuru certainly seems to believe that his parents hold the authority, but idk how much of that is a biased perspective from what Yuzuru saw and knew as a child.

Okay. I think I’ve set the scene for why Yuzuru is insane and weird as fuck. I’d also like to give a brief breather from the agonising lore (bc it’s military time next) to let you all know that I’m writing this whilst desperately smacking auto-live bc I’m grinding for Ghostic Treat House Yuzuru <3 fine I love you <3

That’s all the reprise you get, trauma time again! So, you’re probably aware if you only watched the enstars anime to gain familiarity with ! era lore that Yuzuru spent time at a military facility with his good childhood friend Ibara (he would stab me for saying that lol). But that’s not all! So yes, Yuzuru was sent to the Himemiya’s military facility, where they were actually trained for wars, given the Himemiya’s army are actively fighting ppl during the events of Primavera (lol so much for me saving references to the end). Did Ibara and Yuzuru actually see the battlefield? Textual evidence would suggest perhaps, because Ibara mentions it being funny how a man who can face enemy forces alone is afraid of dogs. But that could be a metaphor and it may have just been training. Either way, definitely had to learn battle relevant skills and were given brutal training. But that’s still not all! From what we can gather from Yuzuru’s internal musings (although he is a somewhat unreliable narrator like 50% of the time tbh), he was sent to the military facility to learn better discipline so he’d stop acting up and play the role of a butler properly. This, combined with the crying when he messed up, gives two plausible reasons for him being sent. 1. he was considered too incompetent and the military was supposed to train him to be more competent as a butler, or 2. he was acting out big style and they wanted to quite literally beat him into submission so he’d treat his role more seriously. There is a scarier third possibility here, but that’s coming hehe don’t worry (: 

What happened when Yuzuru got to the military? Because so far yeah this is a wild situation but it doesn’t highlight Yuzuru’s utter insanity quite as well as I advertised. Ohohoho, don’t worry. Yuzuru was somehow so naturally gifted at being in the fucking military (whilst not being naturally gifted at being a butler, I remind you all!!) that he rose up to leadership and became an instructor IMMEDIATELY. He was in charge of Ibara, and assumably other people too, despite being the same age as him (and quite probably younger than others). Is it possible he rose through the ranks because of his status? No not really. He’s a butler to the Himemiyas, not an actual family member!! And he’s essentially been cast out by them, so why would they care?? It’s also implied and makes all Yuzuru lore add up if he was just… incredibly and terrifyingly talented with weaponry, fighting, tactics, etc etc don’t ask me what military things are important i don’t know. So I’m choosing to believe that the lore all checks out and that Yuzuru was made an instructor because he was freakishly good. Now about his role as an instructor!! 

Most of our info does come from Ibara which is… likely to be negatively biased, but we also have actual flashback scenes which legitimately support Ibara’s perception. Which was, in short, that Yuzuru’s training was spartan. He was harsh and ruthless and ruled with an iron fist… but he also genuinely cared about his pupils (and again, we infer that he had multiple bc he calls Ibara his favourite pupil. Although funny if he’s his fave by default lmao). The military is also the first time Yuzuru gets the chance to be a kid, which is ironic given he is AN INSTRUCTOR IN THE MILITARY. But he gets the chance to sit and talk with Ibara in between training and attempting to murder each other (which is like the closest thing to playing tag that Yuzuru has ever participated in, I reckon). I could write a separate essay about how important Ibara and Yuzuru are to each other, but that’s for another day (pls pls pls ask me to write it pls i just need the excuse). 

We find out some interesting things from Yuzuru’s conversations with Ibara. He hopes to die on the battlefield to show his parents (haha remember that scary third option…. what if this was their plan HAHAHAH). He wants to die out of spite, and he wants to die for the freedom. He hopes he never has to return and be a butler again. He feels free at the military camp, which is ironic given the intent was to trap him there to teach him a lesson. It’s also ironic, given both Ibara and Yuzuru refer to the training camp as an awful, horrible place. 

That definitely isn’t the end of me talking about Yuzuru and military experience, but it is the end of it in this linear fashion I’m taking to explain why Yuzuru is so fucked up and weird and insane.

So, he returns from the military! Read: he is forcibly taken back to the Himemiya mansion. And when he returns, Tori cries and hugs him and begs him to never leave again because he was so lonely without Yuzuru and scared etc etc. And we know that Yuzuru looked at him crying and decided that actually, this was something worth treasuring and putting his life towards. Tori was worth serving- he cared about Tori and wanted to protect him, and he had the abilities now (and probably always) to do exactly that. Was this inspired by Ibara saying he just wanted something to treasure and dedicate his life towards keeping/obtaining? Yep!!! Same story!!! Yuzuru took Ibara’s goal and went ‘snatched, mine now’ but fr… they had such an impact on each other. So, Yuzuru is ‘happily’ being a butler now. In other words, he’s taking his fate and making it his decision, as much as he can (or probably to convince himself hmmm). But where’s the insanity here, before we reach idol time? Well, here we discover that Yuzuru contemplates murdering Tori multiple times!! As a means of escape? As a reflexive urge to kill that he’s developed/been suppressing all along? Who knows! I still can’t quite believe that this is even canon but yeah!!! It’s not always a joke when Yuzuru says scary things to Tori and threatens him with weapons! He has legitimately contemplated murdering him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yuzuru Fucking Fushimi, folks!!!!!!!!

This section is also where I’d like to discuss Yuzuru’s fear of dogs, because he also had to acquaint himself with King (Tori’s dog) during these years. Do you know the reason why Yuzuru’s afraid of dogs? I hear you ask, because I am inside your walls rn. Was there an incident? At the Himemiya’s? At the military camp? No!!! Tori says he’s literally always been afraid of dogs, and Yuzuru confirms this and gives us an explanation as to why! He says that dogs are inherently ferocious hunters- killers at heart- and yet they wear an innocent, harmless mask of being ‘man’s best friend’, covering up the human lives they have taken and are easily capable of taking at the smallest provocation. He fears dogs because he fears their true nature that they’re hiding behind their perceived harmlessness. They’ve masked their bloodlust with domestic obedience- a facade many dogs have tricked themselves into understanding as reality. When I thought about Yuzuru’s explanation for about five minutes before I started this essay, it suddenly slid into place in a way I’d never studied Yuzuru’s fear of dogs before.

Yuzuru fears himself. This checks out with the dog metaphors he makes of himself, of Ibara, that Ibara makes about Yuzuru and of himself. Obedient lapdog, untrained mutt, guard dog etc. etc. The parallels were right there. Yuzuru is an obedient lapdog for Tori… but he’s a predator by nature. A born killing machine whom everyone trusts without hesitation because of the loyal and obedient facade he parades, convincing even himself is reality. Yuzuru is afraid of the hunter he is and when his true nature might escape. I don’t read it as a ‘being afraid of when others will find out that he’s secretly evil’ sort of situation. More a ‘being afraid of when he won’t be able to stop himself & the mask will disintegrate forever and reveal the hunter within. Being afraid of when he might attack’. Ouch. Yuzuru can I give you therapy pls I’m begging. ANYWAY Tori then gets into idols and Yuzuru is dragged along to fine shows, and when Eichi sees him in the audience (ignoring the fact that his first thought is ‘damn that bitch fine as fuck, i love a guy with blue hair purple eyes and a ponytail, smash’), he says Yuzuru looks wild and rugged (i’m going off memory I cba getting Daydream up just trust xoxo), which is interesting given he’s trying his best to be a loyal butler right now. He’s not quite mastered the mask at this point, I suspect. Other things we know from this era are that Yuzuru helped sneak Tori out to go to karaoke as idol practice. I wonder how he felt getting to sing and dance for the first time.

Fun fact in case you hadn’t noticed by now- I’m not very good at staying on topic bc I loooove to go on random tangents of character analysis. I swear this is still about how Yuzuru is the weirdest enstars character… somehow….

So! We’ve finally reached canon timeline in the chronological part of this essay (HOW LONG IS THIS THING GONNA BE?? I hear you worry because, once again, i am in your walls). Yuzuru joins fine yayyy and he’s a transfer student to Yumenosaki given he’s just following Tori. So… did he even go to school before??? Given he has to follow Tori??? Did he take a year out? I’’m so curious as to Yuzuru’s history because how tf did his childhood work? He passes the fine test easily bc turns out he’s also very naturally talented as an idol. He’s very physically fit so it’s unsurprising. What’s sooo fun to know about his joining fine, though, is that he immediately knows exactly what Eichi is like, immediately gets links with the StuCo and joins Keito’s club to get In There with the top people (networking innit and also… club with bow and arrows. Tsukasa confirms he’s freakishly good wow who would’ve guessed Yuzuru would be so naturally talented with a weapon), and apparently immediately developed an escape plan for him and Tori so that if Eichi ever tried to destroy them, he could take Tori and dip. I wonder if that escape plan is still in place, now! Anyway, we also learn in this era that Yuzuru starts to love being an idol and finds he’s genuinely enjoying it. However, the reasons he’s enjoying it are… not exactly normal. He loves being an idol because he’s surprised that it’s able to spur the human emotions of anger and frustration within him (basically, he’s surprised that being an idol brought out his painstakingly buried emotions). We also learn that he’s extremely envious that Tori and Eichi were able to escape their fates laid out by their parents to pursue being idols, but he immediately tries to suppress thoughts like this. The difference between having money and not, huh? Tori and Eichi could escape. Yuzuru was always going to be trapped :( Yuzuru also starts to experience having friends for the first time (does Ibara count as a friend?? It was way wilder and more insane than that) so essentially Yuzuru’s first ever experience of normal teenager things is when he is 16/17. But at least he gets to have a pillow fight and absolutely destroy everyone! And get yelled at by a teacher!! Proud of him for having fun. 

This era is also where we get Yuzuru completely lying to himself, us, and his peers. Everyone is quite conscious of getting Yuzuru to enjoy his life outside of being Tori’s butler, and he’s very much manipulated everyone (including the audience even though we can compile the evidence to discover otherwise) into believing that he’s always been such a loyal and simple butler with no thoughts of his own aside from those that are wishes to serve his master. We know this isn’t true… and yet Yuzuru tries to convince us and everyone in the story that this is reality, to the point that we get people being proud of Yuzuru for coming so far. We get Tori being proud of him! And feeling guilty for him always sacrificing his life for him. Ugh I love Tori actually. The second I started reading stories about Tori and Yuzuru it hit how much guilt Tori has over Yuzuru’s fate and AGHHHH oops I got sidetracked again. Anyway. Yuzuru’s an unreliable narrator and that’s important to his weirdness, because he hides his true utter insanity from even us as the audience!! He lies to himself, to us, to his peers, everyone!!! You cannot fool me, Yuzuru Fushimi. I see through you. I’ve figured out your utter unhingedness. The complete juxtaposition between the very ordinary bland background character you depict yourself as versus the utter fucking WEIRDO that you actually are <3

Moving onto !! era, Yuzuru introduces himself in the main story by being INSANE and everyone seems to forget about it? The first thing he does is discuss how beneficial it is to show up first to important events and prepare the drinks because you gain the upper hand of knowing you could’ve poisoned them and everyone knows you could have, but that he’d never do that because everyone would indeed know it was him. And that’s one of the joys of being a butler! HELLO??? YUZURU WTF BABE????? But that’s always just glanced over. Also there’s the whole insanity of Eichi reminding us that Ibara is the only person whom Yuzuru shows this other side of himself around, and by that we mean the side where he… openly threatens extreme physical violence. Also frontline watchdogs happens. And we learn that Yuzuru still very obviously cares about Ibara gahhh. Anyway, back to insanity time, Wataei are kinda mean to Yuzuru in this era, because they do end up toying with him quite a bit, and we get a lot of Yuzuru dealing with thoughts regarding the Himemiyas and the impact of ES and stuff, because he can’t even just be an idol, he’s also essentially in charge of Tori’s responsibilities until Tori is ready, AND he’s becoming an actor because wow how surprising he’s really good at fighting roles and getting into character (sarcasm, bc… it is not surprising. hey who wants to hear me scream into a forest about wataru and yuzuru and facades it’ll be super fun I promise). Other insane stuff includes the time Yuzuru thinks Ibara is holding Tori hostage so he walks into a room and straight up STRANGLES IBARA because he knows how Ibara responds to being tortured for info so knows he’ll get the truth here. He also proceeds to reveal he’s learnt vocal mimicry from Wataru and will fuck shit up if Ibara tries anything using that trick (how did he learn that???? Plus Wataru is cagey about teaching new skills so it is either an omg yay wataru and yuzuru getting close moment or a…. yuzuru did you just analyse his ability and somehow replicate it??). Also in this era, we learn that Yuzuru accompanies Eichi with a lot of business related things, because of course he gets to be involved in the big ES happenings, and that he’s become wayyy more petty and rude to Eichi. It’s a big step for Yuzuru, who’s been forced to be so polite to his superiors. Like can you believe it. The Himemiyas’ butler being rude and passive aggressive and turning down THE Eichi Tenshouin?? He’s wild for that, but he knows Eichi well enough to know he’s safe because Eichi loves it. Yuzuru is so good at reading people. Oh yeah the other !! era moment I was going to mention was the time he took both Adonis and Hiiro in a fight. Canonically strong guys with training in martial arts/defensive techniques. And he legit scared Hiiro with how suddenly his demeanour changed from passive butler to ‘don’t hold back on me >:)’ oooo I love the utter thrill he always gets when he can go all out and attack people!! He’s so fucked up!!

And now on the theme of that, we have !!! era, because pretty much all he’s done since this new era began is fight people. In his cross scout with Kaoru, he gets disappointed in himself when Nagisa outruns him. It’s interesting to note that despite the lack of practice of his abilities Yuzuru gets outside of situations often purposefully set up so he can fight (usually by Eichi and/or Wataru like the incident in Fist of Idol Togenkyo), he still assumes himself to be… the best at any sort of combat out of everyone in his current environment. Do you know what I would give to see Yuzuru and Kuro fight??? I would LOVE to witness it, but I know neither of them would be willing to go all out on each other :(. So when Nagisa ends up out-running/outmanoeuvring him, he’s peeved. Like it’s not a surprise given Nagisa is genetically created to be The Best at Everything, but damn, how highly does Yuzuru think of his own combat abilities? It never really hit me until this point. Not only is he trained at combat, but he very much thinks/knows he’s good at it, and essentially takes pride in that fact? He’s such an interesting critter. Then we have the shuffle unit, too, where Yuzuru gets to go all out and apprehend a thief and he VISIBLY has fun doing it, as well as internally discussing as much. But we also have textual proof from someone else (a random director) that Yuzuru’s ‘snap’ is a thing. He can switch between this polite, passive butler and a bloodthirsty beast in SECONDS, and the joy he feels from being a vicious hunter is probably palpable. Other people can see him essentially change mask at the flip of a switch and become someone else entirely, and it’s wild. The fact Niki is the other person who does this is also beautiful because Niki in hunger mode is also a terrifying bloodthirsty beast. Can’t believe he won most normal, even with CrazyB being CrazyB.

I’ve finally covered somewhat of a chronological series of events for Yuzuru’s character that have led to the juicy stuff of why I view him as the straight up weirdest and least normal character. Whilst that was a lot of character analysis to do with who he is at his core, as well as his background and where he’s at mentally and in terms of progression in the story, now is for a beautiful collection of utterly unhinged things he’s said/done that make me go ‘what the FUCK Yuzuru’. Which, admittedly, I do a LOT. 

he MCs for the new year live featuring Trickstar and Akatsuki and decides to fuck around with Keito because he looks too serious. He then gets drunk on the joy of fucking with Keito and just keeps screwing with the scoring system and everything whilst Keito is seething with the betrayal

he used to genuinely think his drawings were lovely, but then according to others they looked like ‘horrifying yokai thirsting for blood’, ‘vegetables committing cannibalism’ or just ‘makes [them] anxious looking at it’ so wtf is actually wrong with his perception???

has said he feels the urge to kill Tori sometimes, but ‘a true gentleman suppresses his anger’…. JUST SIT WITH THAT ONE FOR A WHILE

He’s said he wants to dissect Wataru… medically… bc of his stamina levels

He’s also threatened to take Wataru to a secluded area and cut off each of his fingers with a bradawl. YUZURU??????

Nagisa is surprised at his dexterity when he very competently ties Jun to a pillar

He cleans ES and Yumenosaki in secret because he doesn’t trust other people to do it right. Not the most insane thing ever but it adds to his issues. Also cleaning is his favourite thing to do. Cleaning. This man has a body count and I mean in the murder sense

He loves to draw even though he’s shit at it. It’s just really funny to me that he’s very dexterous and talented at pretty much everything except the one hobby he wants to have

He can pilot a helicopter- only he and Madara are known to be capable of this

He’s the best at archery and at using firearms in Yumenosaki. And most likely ES. But he’s careful not to show off his talent and ‘true nature’ because he’s an idol and doesn’t want to scare people off

He has abs. Multiple characters have commented on this. Koga has felt them up

When he gets lost in thought he tightens his grip ridiculously tight. Figured this out due to him subconsciously tightening his grip on both Ibara’s neck during SS and Tori’s clothes during Resort Live

He speaks overly politely, but with the exact same dialect as Ibara which- i’m gonna lose my linguist status for the way I’m about to butcher this- from what I can gather is easy to interpret in a rude and sharp/passive aggressive tone. I’m going off characters who say Ibara and Yuzuru speak exactly the same, and the way Rei and Eichi highlight how Yuzuru says polite words but they’re very rude and barbed despite the politeness

His dancing is sharp and impeccable and his physical abilities are apparently ridiculously impressive, far above what would ever be expected of a butler (who’s surprised?)

His administrative abilities are incredible because he’s just overall a freakish genius apparently

He can completely hide his presence. He managed to scare Nagisa during the recent Halloween event and Nagisa is a very literal freak of nature who has been lab made to be a perfect specimen with like every skill ever soooooo terrifyingly impressive imo

Now, to conclude this insanity is my main point as to why Yuzuru takes the cake as the most insane enstars character to me. And whilst yes it’s obvious from all of this that he’s absolutely batshit insane, so are many other characters, but the reason my vote goes to Yuzuru over anyone else is because of the disparity between his public perception vs. who he is. And I mean both in game and out of game. I asked my lovely partner whose biggest flaw is not giving a flying fuck about my beloved Yuzuru Fushimi no matter how many times I yell about him what their opinion was of Yuzuru prior to knowing my insanity about him. I’d like to highlight that my partner is a big fan of Ibara, so knew about Yuzuru’s backstory at least, but was otherwise oblivious to most fine lore outside the main story, being a CrazyBP. My girlfriend said that, to them, Yuzuru was just a mild mannered butler who doesn’t come across as a big personality, especially next to the rest of fine. She said he’s very overshadowed when you have 2 characters very in-your-face personality wise and Eichi Fucking Tenshouin in your unit. Further thoughts were that whilst some characters you can soak up information of via osmosis, Yuzuru isn’t one of them.

And this was INSANE to me. Because how is it possible to be an Ibara fan and a NikiP who loves Niki’s kitchen and somehow no Yuzuru lore has seeped into your awareness???? And this is what makes me go oh yeah. Yuzuru is the least normal character from a character perspective as well as within the narrative. How do you write a character THIS INSANE with this many unhinged things being said and done in pretty much any story he shows up in, but the fandom who don’t pay attention to him just,,, completely miss it all and view him EXACTLY AS HE TRIES TO PRESENT HIMSELF TO OTHER CHARACTERS: as a mild-mannered, overly polite butler who loves servitude?? Yuzuru Fushimi has not only bewitched the characters into believing his facade, but he’s thoroughly hoodwinked the general audience of ensemble stars too. No one believes Wataru to be normal and casual, and arguably he’s the most normal of fine (at least in terms of upbringing, consistency, motivations etc….. but also he is literally me and i’ve been told I’m devastatingly Not Normal, so maybe that doesn’t count). No one would claim to call Kanata normal. No one thinks HiMERU or Mayoi or Shu & Mika, or the twins are normal. Everyone knows, at least in part, how insane they are, whether they produce the unit and know the lore or not. But Yuzuru!!!! He has fooled you all!!!! He has fooled everyone, and that’s exactly what he wants to do but exactly what he is terrified of doing, too. He fears the utter insanity inside him, but he’s also desperate for any chance he can find to unleash it and, for lack of a better phrase, go beast mode.

Yuzuru Fushimi, folks. He is one hell of a character and I hope you’ve enjoyed my ridiculously long essay on exactly why he is the craziest son of a bitch in ensemble stars. At least to me <3

And now for an incomplete list of references because I legit forget where half my knowledge comes from, I just read it once and forever absorb it into my brain:

! Era:

RESORT LIVE!!! lots of Yuzuru insight

Noble game. A lot of Yuzuru, specifically within his Butler context

GANG!!!! This is the backstory & ibayuzu lore story and it kills me every time

Flower Fes. Not huge on Yuzuru lore but gives an insight into his beginnings at Yumenosaki

Toyland. Yuzuru’s drawings and feelings about being an idol come up here. As well as Tori’s guilt about Yuzuru

School Trip. Aka Yuzuru unreliable narrator the novel

!! Era:

FRONTLINE WATCHDOGS!!!! It’s the Ibayuzu lore of !! era. !!’s answer to Gang

SS finals. It’s really long so specifically the chapters with Ibara and Yuzuru are where the lore is

Fist of Idol Togenkyo. I didn’t mention it much here but it covers Yuzuru’s acting and fighting quite well

Tempest & Primavera are the fine stories that discuss Yuzuru’s current role in ES and Tori’s life best but I didn’t reference them loads

Fair Waltz. It’s a short scout story but it’s so good for Yuzuru & Eichi dynamic & Yuzuru fighting

Grand Slam. There’s like one chapter during the sports festival about Yuzuru and guns lol

Yuzuru idol story episode 3. Ibayuzu reflect on their past & I cry

Seasoning as you like (Niki idol story). Niki’s kitchen revealing some of Yuzuru’s violent tendencies

!!! Era

Intelligence. Cross scout with Kaoru where the Nagisa incident happens

Ballade of the Lost Ones. Shuffle Unit!!!! Yuzuru goes wild!!!

[lady-ashfade]

I thought It Was Normal

Percy Jackson character x male!reader (gods x reader) (platonic all)

╰･ﾟ✧☽ reader: like klaus from TUA. reader is a little oc in this, but i couldn’t help it. I needed this because I got a funny idea.

╰･ﾟ✧☽ warnings: short , me having little knowledge of what’s to come in the books, not canon just a silly idea

Camp got new campers every year so it wasn’t like they thought anything of you. The only thing is, you looked too confused to be there, everything Chiron said you would would give him the strangest look. Percy happened to be passing by, you got a tour of camp just like he did. And you were a bit to loud with your words- and let’s face it. He’s a little nosy.

“So you’re saying all the gods just drop their kids off here- or, don’t give them attention until they do something they deem worthy?” You ask like you had no care.

“Really a great idea. Half gods with daddy and mommy issues running around in the same place. Doesn’t sound dangerous at all.” You comment and continued walking with a eye roll.

Percy was interested in you right after that. You made him laugh and shared his views when he first came here, and he still thought them. He didn’t have to wait long to introduce himself since you left Hermes cabin in a rush to get away from people.

You didn’t want to talk to him at first. He tried to introduce himself but you brushed him off and said you weren’t willing to speak.

“I know it’s a lot to take in, but I’m sure you’re parent will claim you.”

You stopped in your tracks and turn around and started to flail your arms. “I am human! I have no godly parent, not like you-. Honestly I wish I was because I would be less concerned about my future.”

“That’s new.” A girl’s voice popped up from behind you and out of no where. A girl with a cap in her hands yanked down from her head, she looked intimidating to you.

“Can you all do that? Just appear out of no where?” You asked slightly scared but amazed.

“Let’s go back to the part where you’re human,” Percy stepped forward like you were a bomb of some sort ready to explode. “Why are you here?” You scuffed and shrugged your shoulders.

“So, i happened to eat a crystal I found in the woods behind my house. It was weird and it had me hypnotized, surprised I didn’t break any teeth, and the next minute I know I’m seeing the dead. And these voices are talking to me, then I’m moved off to this camp.”

“Wait the dead?”

“The gods say I need training before I came to them. Which is weird because you think they would train me themselves…do you guys know what I should do? I have no clue why they want me.” You look at both of them for help but Percy is just staring with his mouth open and shocked. Annabeth looks annoyed and looking you up and down.

“Don’t piss them off.”  she was going to be great help.

Months go by and you grow closer to the trio. it was strange how you seemed to have more strength then a human, and could kept up in training with them. not once did you ever get claimed and it still surprised them to this day how you just become something out of the blue. They tried so hard to get their parents attention but you just- stumped upon something and had the gods interests?

yes, you were human. but no longer a human boy, but a god in training.

“did it have to be him? he’s more chaotic then your son Poseidon.” zues rubbed his temple as the gods watch down on you.

“fate is a funny thing brother.“

“I for one love the kid.” ares smirks as you trip percy and let out a vicious scream. nothing evil or mean behind it, just a adrenaline rush. but ares didn’t take it that why, you were going to be a monster.

“I’ll bless him soon, he should stay in my cabin.” Aphrodite smiles and played with her hair. 

“We all know he’s basically my child, the dead thing? Yeah, he’ll be staying with me in the underworld when it’s time.” Hades smirks at all of them.

and just like that the gods are starting a war all over again.

Reader: stumbles upon a crystal

the voices: eat me!!

Reader: No!! Let me go!!

Reader then becomes a god.

[ooooo-mcyt]

There seems to be a running theme with honor and “honorable” kills. Gem and Pearl, scar/jimmy and Grian, even Cleo and bigb with the betrayal. I’m interested to see how the alliances are torn/made with this

Also gempearl divorce

I think the focus on "honorable" kills in many ways comes down to the characters' desire for basic agency.

There aren't many choices anyone can make in this game. They have to play, they have to die. They don't get any choice over being here, over the game mechanics, over their inevitable fates. Any mark of agency characters get is in little things. How they choose to react to things, managing to scrape up some semblance of a 'win' for themselves, or being able to die on their own terms.

Most things in the series can be read through this lens of agency, but the "honorable kills" theme is one of the biggest ones.

Gem knows she has to die, it's part of the game, but there was something traumatic about the end of Secret Life from her perspective. Her team was strong, and then it wasn't, sustaining an injury they couldn't recover along, but continuing to drag themselves along as every single option and choice they thought they had was gone, and Gem died alone, two against one. This season she refuses to have that agency taken away from her, and she resents Pearl for trying, for refusing to give her an honorable fight.

The reason killing Impulse got to Ren so much is because Ren prides himself on his honor. Ren's never truly had much choice in his own life, but one thing he can always choose is to have principals, is to stick to his sense of honor. We see Ren do something he deems dishonorable and immediately make excuses, craft a narrative in which he was led to it, in which it wasn't his fault, in which he never would have done it on his own. Ren creates a boogeyman so he doesn't have to face the thought that his honor can fail. So he doesn't have to face the fact that the desperation of this game can take away one of his only ways of control in his own life.

Grian, when victim to 'cheap' kills, feels like it's a violation of his personal agency as well. He has a chance in a fair fight, or against a well laid trap, and when the kill is silly, well, usually he lets those happen for the bit. But a cheap kill isn't something that can easily be avoided, and it makes him feel helpless. What does it mean if someone can just kill him and he doesn't even have a chance to stop it? Furthermore, Grian practically offered to let Scar in specific kill him, and if Scar took him up on it, that would have been Grian's choice. But instead Scar turned him down and then went for the 'cheap' kill anyways, as if Scar was trying to make him as powerless as possible (scar wasn't, of course, but it must have felt like it)

People locked in an endless looping death game want to be able to feel like they have a choice, like they have agency, and they don't feel right when the little ways they can keep that agency are taken from them.

[wrongbodies]

The Punishment

Kurt thought of himself highly. Being one of the better players on the school’s baseball team, he was well regarded on and off the diamond. Having always been athletically gifted, and with little done to mitigate his ego, he had grown into quite a jerk. It was common for him to outright ignore students and peers who he deemed below his social circle. And with all the adoration he was used to, he was mostly able to surround himself with the people he wanted.

However, there was a side to Kurt not many knew. In fact, the only ones who knew were boys at summer camps or other such short term happenings. Kurt was gay, and loved getting with guys when he was certain there was little chance they could expose him to his precious social scene at home. When he was with these faraway trysts, he was pleasant and tender, but only because he never would face them again.

But all inflated egos pop one day, and usually at one’s own doing. As Kurt was a senior now, 18 years old and already scouted for college, he wasn’t so careful anymore. He figured he was bound for another state at a great school… Why worry about some nerd who was going to a school across the country (opposite where he was going)? 

Enter Ian. The boy was as doomed as far as poor gay boys in unwelcoming states can get. He was the kind of gay who couldn’t shuck the mannerisms or quash his hormones when flights of fancy caught him. Still, he was a good student and tried his best to do right to others as his single mother taught him. And despite the hard times he was bound for a decent enough school, below where his aptitude could get him, but well within their price range.

Kurt found Ian one day checking him out, a not so surreptitious stare giving him away. Normally, Kurt would ignore someone like that. But something about Ian’s lustful eyes and Kurt’s unchecked libido had him look back. He walked by Ian and whispered to meet in the dugout at the school baseball field afterschool. They would begin a secret affair, where Kurt would put Ian through his paces.

Ian, unfortunate romantic that he was, caught feelings. How could he not? Kurt, with his perfect body, unblemished save for the occasional bruises and scrapes from baseball, he was beautiful. And sometimes he handled Ian in their secret hookups so tenderly one could think it was love. But Kurt loved only himself and how he felt when he released inside Ian, and when the stupid nerd begged to be more than secret fuckbuddies… Well, Kurt roared with laughter. They had just finished screwing that fateful day, when he pushed Ian off his dick, who would fall into the reddish-brown dirt. 

Kurt pulled on his clothes, snickering as he turned away and reminded Ian that he was a nobody to him. That he was basically the human equivalent of a cumrag. Ian, outraged, felt his thin fingers claw into the dirty floor. Something inside him broke, a power he didn’t know he had or perhaps an entity beyond our ken took pity. He had little thought other than what he admonished Kurt with as he spoke: “I wish you knew, you jerk. I wish you knew what it was like to be me, and I wish I could be you.”

Kurt chuckled at that, and said, “sure, Ian. When I’m you tomorrow, are we still on to meet up and fuck here? I guess you’d get to top then, huh?”

It was as he was turning away he felt the air change. It wasn’t breezy before, but now it was like molasses. He came to a rest, as a shudder ran all across his body. From his position on the ground, Ian saw Kurt stop moving, just as a similar sensation ran across his form. Kurt turned to look back at Ian again, this time fear in his eyes. Someone always in control, always domineering and powerful, now was in the grip of something he couldn’t comprehend. 

As the shuddering feeling came again, this time the two felt something like a wave start from the top of their heads, sweeping all the way down to their feet. Ian looked at Kurt, and noticed he was shrinking, turning paler by the moment. Kurt saw the opposite, Ian naked on the ground seemed to expand and gain tanner skin by the moment. It became apparent as their faces rippled and changed, the two were switching bodies. Kurt was horrified to see his body before him, his muscles rippling now without clothing to hide under. And Ian became strangely giddy to see Kurt swimming in the clothes he once filled out so perfectly.

“What, why is this happening?” Kurt cried.

“I think this is… your punishment.” Ian smirked. Kurt looked mortified, and started tearing up. Ian started grabbing at the clothes Kurt was wearing. “I need these, you're much too small for them anyways.”

“B-but-” Kurt whimpered. Ian tossed his old clothing at Kurt, garments Kurt would never wear but now were the only hope of hiding his tiny new body.

“Hey Kurt, or Ian I should say…” Ian grinned from his new body, his clothes now in place. “I think I WILL top tomorrow. But also, I think we should go public, don’t you think?”

Kurt felt his stomach drop… this truly was a punishment.

[screamingmandrakes]

Due to the interest in my Tomarrymort post yesterday, I’ve decided to dump a Harrymort WIP I’m not sure if I’m going to finish. This is a little over 1k words. Content warning for non-consensual Somnophilia and references to previous sexual assault. So fair warning - dead dove: do not eat.

Thank you to @xenomorphology-ao3 for some lovely touches on this fic.

Given as this is not finished, this is not edited. Some things in it might be worded poorly because I hadn’t refined it yet. Basically, don’t hold this to too high of a standard lmao.

This was intended to be a sequel to all is fair (in love and war) It’s Voldemort having a inner crisis about the fact Harry will die some day lol.

“There is nothing worse than death, Dumbledore!”

- Chapter Thirty-six, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Little does Lord Voldemort value.

Few things are preeminent: power, for starters, second only to the blood of his mother coursing through his veins. Third, his body: spindling with skin stretched tightly over sharp, protruding bones, the vessel that brought him to victory. Nagini, a weapon forged for battle, with jagged fangs and the speed of a whip, follows suit.

Before all these things comes something immeasurable. His Soul. His Boy. His Harry. But as little as Lord Voldemort values, so too does he fear. He is an unstoppable force, unmovable by will. Unbreakable, even when abandoned in the forests of Albania. His Death Eaters paid the price for their insolence, yes, but he is a forgiving Lord. After all, he had forgiven Harry many times, drowning out the angry screams and curses until they finally faded away.

There is only one thing Voldemort fears, and that is death.

Not for himself, not anymore. Lord Voldemort will never die. Power rests heavily in his hands, soldiered into the minimal soul he has left. Time and victory have built him into an indestructible being, but His Boy does not exist as the same. He is not as fragile as Voldemort often deems; even as a young boy, he had withstood the force of his master, protected by the blood of his mother. But he is mortal — whole. Harry spends most of his days locked in their chamber, sitting in the middle of their inordinate bed while glaring bitterly wherever Voldemort stands. When he does not, he is kept close to his master’s side, bound to him by magic. Lord Voldemort takes care of what is his, and His Boy is no exception, but as mighty as he is, Harry does not exist without vulnerability.

It is now, as His Boy sleeps once more, dosed under yet another sedative potion brewed by his Lord’s dutiful servant. In the morning, Harry will rise to a goblet tainted with Amortentia. Harry has only a few precious moments to feel the full spectrum of his fury-led resistance before he’s subdued again, lulled into the fantasy fate crafted for them upon the death of his mother. This is a cycle driven solely by Harry’s refusal to submit – to accept the reality that has always been meant for him. It is not one Lord Voldemort prefers, but a necessary step he must take.

Food comes aplenty for His Boy, served on silver platters by trembling house elves. With a loud crack, they apparate out of the room as swiftly as they arrived, leaving Voldemort alone to attend to Harry. A product of his parents, Harry is just as willful as his foolish mother had been, refusing to accept mercy at the expense of his autonomy. Under the effects of the Amortentia, he is a willing participant, eagerly lapping the juices of freshly ripe pomegranates from Voldemort’s skeletal fingers. When he wakes, barely coherent, he fights with a fury Voldemort yearns to consume.

His Boy’s rage is a delicacy. Who is he to deny himself such a feast?

But for now, he is compliant, stretching across their bed with a dazed look on his face. His eyes rest at half-mast, eyelashes fluttering against his cheeks as he comes in and out of consciousness. With each sunset, Harry’s body grows thinner. His pallid skin stretches over his bones, bleached from months without the sun. Voldemort’s long, bony fingers graze the tender skin of Harry’s inner thigh, his shirt bunched above his belly button, and he is reminded once again of Harry’s mortality. Each breath Harry takes is a breath closer to death.

He further trails the curve of Harry’s thighs, his sharp nail snagging on the expensive fabric of his pants. They’re tailored perfectly to his size, crafted from the highest quality material he could acquire. The Malfoy’s were not pleased to offer their funds for such a service, but Lord Voldemort’s word comes as law and no request by him shall be overlooked. Moving upward, he traces the button securing the clothing around Harry’s waist, his nail momentarily slipping under his waistband. Harry stirs, blinking hazily but otherwise does not object. Voldemort’s power does not come without resources; he is accompanied by the most skilled of potion makers. Snape brews as he’s asked, holding no questions for the purpose. A dash of valerian root does nicely for a modified sedative — not quite awake, yet not asleep.

“My Soul…” Voldemort hisses to nobody in particular. Harry’s chest rises and falls with a gentle motion. He seems truly at peace like this, far from the sobered version of him. Voldemort craves such a reality, but the taste of Harry’s stormy temper isn’t entirely opposed. It’s strength, something Voldemort has always valued. A narrow, shallow scratch lingers in the wake of his claw as he graces the hair lining Harry’s torso. Though still thin, Harry is far different from the scrawny boy Voldemort had faced while existing as nothing more than a part of Quirrell. Yes, he should have known then, known when Quirrell’s skin bubbled under Harry’s fingers, that His Boy was part of something much bigger than a prophecy.

Voldemort’s nail travels further, combing through the dark, coarse hair until he dips into the divet of Harry’s navel. Harry shudders sleepily, his stomach twitching under his touch. The bed groans as Voldemort leans closer, his other hand reaching to brush the hair from Harry’s face. He is just eighteen now, only a few years older than Voldemort was when he murdered his father. Yet Harry is different. When he isn’t bellowing at Voldemort or existing in a drugged up stupor, Harry is kind. He speaks to the house elves with compassion that makes them scatter, fearful of the unfamiliar sweetness. He tells them please and thank you and offers a smile, even when it’s exceptionally weak.

His Boy is nothing like him, yet they are one of the same.

Perhaps, one day he’ll allow Harry to have a wand again. Not yet, as His Boy is still rather combative. Their duel in the graveyard had been a fluke, a stroke of luck, but Harry is not entirely inept at battle. Not enough to give him freedom. But now, as His Boy remains plaint under his fingertips, it is Lord Voldemort that harnesses all of the power. The hand not on Harry’s stomach grazes over the scar on his forehead, feeling the thrum of their connection in his fingertips. Voldemort does not feel whole—cannot feel whole—but there is a snap like two puzzle pieces fitting together whenever he touches Harry.

His hand falls from Harry’s forehead, passing over his collarbones and down his chest until he stops where the boy’s shirt scrunches up. For a moment, both hands rest there, white claws stark against his skin. It’s the perfect image — Harry, long limbed and thinly built, muscles undefined from months of inactivity, at his Lord’s disposal. He is frighteningly fragile like this, and the thought makes something acidic churn in Voldemort’s gut. It’s an abnormal feeling, one that doesn’t belong to a being like him. Lord Voldemort does not care for others, but Harry Potter’s life rests in the palm of his hand, his to twist and mend. His to protect.

His Soul will yearn for nothing — feel pain only from the hand of his Master. He has made sure to take vengeance where it is due; the remaining heirs of His Boy suffered terrible, merciless deaths. Voldemort feasted on the pain, savored the wailing of the detestable mother and the terrified yet defiant bellowing of the red-faced father as their brat of a son thrashed on the floor. Exterminating vermin comes with ease.

But love — no, love is not something that comes naturally to Lord Voldemort. It is an act met with repulsion, perceived as weakness. There is no good and evil, yet the notion of love remains inexplicably good. Voldemort does not feel love— no, love is a vulnerability, love is foolish. Love is what killed Lily Potter, yet kept His Boy alive. He does not — cannot — love Harry, but he holds the urge to tear the world apart and offer him the pieces. Power has little place within Harry Potter, and Lord Voldemort owns no desire to share such a thing. But Harry has no place among the Mudbloods of the world, and what can Voldemort offer if not rightful respect?

Slowly, Voldemort moves upward again, his hand gliding along Harry’s torso until his fingers slip under his shirt. Harry shifts once more, his eyelids fluttering open to show glassy, unfocused eyes as he attempts to find purchase in reality. Voldemort merely smiles, lip pulling back menacingly to expose the two serrated teeth protruding from his mouth. He knows Harry will not remember this come morning.

His skin is hot to the touch as Voldemort’s fingers, cold and clinical, explore his body. It is not much different than he had been fifty some years ago, but the curves and contours of Harry feel much more delicate. Despite his inactivity, in actuality, Harry is still rather strong, clawing at his Master with ferocity whenever Voldemort comes to take what is his. His fingers slip through the splattering of hair on Harry’s chest.

[lane-ys-world]

Blank The Series - A BLANK slate?

Have you ever wondered what would happen if you put two stupidly attractive women in a television show and basically said “Make this show as disgustingly cute as humanly possible?”

No? Well then you clearly haven’t seen Blank The Series. Now, if you’ve been into GL (Girls Love/ Lesbian) dramas for a while now then maybe you’ve seen GAP The Series. If not, then it’s time to come out from the comfort of the rock you’ve been living under.

These two stories intersect due to the two sisters, Neung and Sam. After Song, the middle sister, tragically passes away following an argument with their grandmother over her sexuality, Song vows to never return to their family home and gets into a car accident on her way back to her girlfriend. Of course their grandmother, who has spent all this time raising them, rejects the relationship and then blames Song’s girlfriend for her death. The family is then divided with Neung blaming her grandmother for her sister’s death and Sam trying to just keep her remaining family together. Things come to a head, however, when Sam falls in love with a woman and their grandmother, set in her homophobic ways, tries to get Sam to marry a ‘nice boy’ she chose and deems worthy instead.

This backfires…greatly!

Sam, still wanting to keep the peace but also wanting to love who she loves, becomes a shell of herself before her grandmother’s eyes – unable to eat and incapable of engaging on any meaningful level with either her grandmother or her betrothed. This is when Nana realizes she’s gone too far and is at risk of losing her remaining granddaughter – because Neung booked it the minute she got her bearings and promised that she, too, would only ever return when her Nan was cold and due for a meeting with her maker.

Neung upon finding out that Sam was about to choose Granmama over the love of her life – they’re sisters, they still tell each other just about everything – decides it’s time to intervene and sticks her neck out for Sam in order to show her that her grandmother was the only person in the family getting anything out of the rules she was making and she expected everyone else to pretend to be happy with said rules – I’m paraphrasing, obvi. Well, fate or destiny or common freaking sense intervenes and gran takes her foot off Sam’s neck and ‘allows’ her to follow her heart – which leads Sam right back to Mon (her girlfriend).  Happy endings all around, right?

Not quite.

See, as Sam’s story has a happy ending we come to realise that the gran still has huge expectations of Neung… like the fact the she too was expected to marry a ‘nice boy’ that granmama deemed fit for her. That went over like a cinder block in a lake. Neung ran from the wedding!! She was already in her dress, at the venue, on the day and she decided “yeah, this isn’t for me.” So, she ran. Which is how she declared her excommunication. Her Nan was not pleased with this turn of events because it embarrassed the family, made them indebted to the nice boy’s family and all that jazz.

The boy (Chet), who so happens to be Neung’s high school best friend’s baby daddy, had had a crush on Neung since the beginning of time – why he then went and slept with her best friend is still beyond me. Ooooh, and let’s not forget the fact that Neung’s high school bestie – Piengfah – was also in love with her. Honestly, at this point we should just have NA (Neung Anonymous) meetings because she’s starting to seem like an addictive substance.

Now, you may be thinking ‘there is no way in hell this gets crazier!’ You would be WRONG! Not only are the baby daddy and her bestie in love with her, but so is the child of those two! Yes, a cool twenty years (I’m working off of the show, not the books – don’t come for me) after the baby was born, she too falls in love with Neung! And where her mother and father both failed, she succeeds in climbing over Neung's walls and military crawling her way into her heart. And babe, that’s just the beginning because, you see, Daddy Chet and ABSENT MOTHER Piengfah, are absolutely not going to allow their 21-year-old daughter to fall in love with someone sixteen years her senior and they are going to pull all the stops… but that will be in season 2 which is dropping in May, 2024.

Now, let’s talk about how these two stories compare to one another.

Before we continue though, please remember that this is in no way intended to downgrade any one of these shows and, honestly, I loved both iterations of the siblings so we are not going to put anybody down here!

GAP the series, which aired in the second half of 2023, follows the story of Sam and Mon. Sam is depicted as an emotionally stunted individual who is completely uncertain of her own feelings – so much so that her friend circle has to second guess all her decisions in order to figure out what it is she actually wants. Why is she like this? Because of her grandmother, obviously.

Sam’s grandmother, after Song died and Neung ran, put immense amounts of pressure on Sam and essentially stripped her down to “yes, granmama” and “no, granmama”. Being from one of the royal families in Thailand, there are expectations of this family that Neung will no longer live up to and so they have fallen onto Sam.

So, gran did the sensible thing the moment the eldest sister left and doubled down on her control of Sam’s life because she was the only person who knew what would create a fruitful and successful life not just for Sam but for the family image.

How does dear granmama accomplish this? By giving Sam an ultimatum.

When Sam was of age she asked her gran if she could open her own business and she was told that she could have her own business until she was a certain age then she would have to completely give up that dream and get married to the man that was chosen for her.

Sam is business minded and has grown her company into something she is quite proud of. The kicker? Her betrothed is her business partner and keeps sticking his nose in her business – not always in the worst ways but he definitely thinks her knows what is best for here without consulting her.

Enter Mon.

Mon comes into the company as an intern. Her area of focus being social media marketing. She excels at this, gets the company numbers up and is fitting in well. Mon has a secret though… she’s been in love with Sam since their school days but Sam doesn’t remember her. Mon has crafted her entire life around the idea of being “good enough” for Sam and she feels like she’s finally on the right path. Sam starts to notice Mon and they start a secret affair because Sam made a rule that dating in the workplace is prohibited so if anyone catches on that they are fornicating in the office, Sam is going to be forced to fire her girlfriend.

But, of course, things must be better before they get worse so Kirk, grandmama’s lapdog and Sam’s betrothed, finds out about Sam and Mon and immediately runs to tell granny that she needs to get the little miss back under control before she destroys the family image by being publically gay? Look, I don’t know what this idiot thought he was doing but gran finds out.

Cue confrontation!

Sam yells, gran yells, Kirk – for whatever reason – is also yelling. Then Neung appears, as if out of thin air, dragging Mon along to also yell. Now we have a full house! Back and forth, yell yell yell and then Sam decides Mon is more important than all that noise and she starts to make her exit when gran falls back onto the chair behind her gripping her chest and you’ll never guess what was going on there…

If you guessed that she was performing open heart surgery on herself, you would be sorely mistaken. No, she’s apparently having a heart attack! Neung isn’t buying it and Sam decides to believe her sister so her and Mon leave… only for Sam to abandon Mon once gran is admitted to the hospital.

Sam then goes about planning her wedding and Mon plans on flying halfway around the world to avoid her now ex but Sam is struggling and gran is suddenly feeling a little guilty about caging her barely free bird.

All that aside, Mon and Sam end up married and Kirk ends up in a ditch… or at least I wish he did 😒.

Now, onto Neung’s story.

Neung has always felt pressured to be perfect. Her grandmother groomed her to be the perfect lady after all. Not a hair, nor a thread out of place. Neung’s entire life had been planned out like a well written story and all she had to do was jump from page to page quietly and allow all the things that were intended for her to come her way. She goes through the motions set before her like a good little doll and allows her gran to have full control of her life. That is, until her sister comes home one day and tells the family that she has fallen in love.

You'd think this is good news but from the looks on grans face it would probably be closer to the look you'd give someone if their dog urinated on your custom polar bear white fleece rug.

She turned her nose up at the very thought that her granddaughter would be ‘defective’ and immediately told Song to end that useless relationship so she could focus on more realistic things… like marrying the man that dear ol’ gran had already chosen for her. When Song refused, all hell broke loose and gran kicked her out.

So Song left, Neung raged and the grandmother stood on her sanctimoniously high horse thinking she had saved her bloodline from embarrassment or whatever. Then the news came that Song was deceased and still the grandmother refused to take accountability, choosing instead to blame Song’s girlfriend.

This is where I think Neung drew the line. Blaming the person that Song chose to love for her dying was the final straw and she decided she wanted no part of this ruse any longer. She left the family home and decided to live the life of a struggling artist. Her grandmother cut her off so her finances were up in the air most of the time but Sam was always there to be safety net.

Neung had resigned herself to never finding love, never being happy, never having anyone to call her own because she had been taught that no one was worthy of her. No one that her gran didn’t say was worthy, anyway. So she went on living like that… until the sun came out from behind the clouds and we all know what they say about dynamite coming in small packages.

This new force of nature was a pint-sized, 20-year-old beauty with an innocence that could make cherubs sing. She came by Neung’s store one day and asked to have her portrait done – Neung is actually an artist, but she’s ‘struggling’ by choice at this point – and Neung wasn’t going to turn a paying customer away. So they sat, for hours, while Neung got every detail of this girl’s face down on paper. The girl, coincidentally named Aneung, had been planning this meeting for ages and once she had her in she was not planning on being shut out again. And, boy, does this little nugget wear Neung down.

Eventually Neung admits that Aneung has become an integral part of herself and she doesn’t want to extricate herself from Aneung. That’s all well and good, until Neung finds out who Aneung’s mother is.

She is now confronted with her best friend from high school who she told to abort her baby because she felt it would possibly ruin her life to go through with the pregnancy. Piengfah – Aneung’s mother – also admits that she named her baby that, out of spite, as a reminder to herself that the person she loved the most told her to get rid of her baby before it was even born. And now Neung is in a guilt spiral because the person she has come to love might not have been born if her mother had listened to her best friend.

Anyway, not to give too much more of the story away, the gran dies. We should all be very sad about this… Neung is beside herself because she realizes she will never have the opportunity to make up with her gran. Again, guilt spiral!

Maybe if she had listened… maybe if she had married the guy gran chose… or if she spoke to her kindly the last time they were together…

All these possibilities are running through Neung’s mind and then Aneung comes to her, wanting to help her in any way she can. And, for a time, Neung allows this. Neung then wakes up the morning after her grans wake with the bright idea the Aneung is too good for her and she needs to push her away. Which she does, spectacularly. Aneung is besides herself while also trying to reason with her lover but nothing seems to be working so she leaves. And once again, Neung is all on her own…

This show has me wanting to call my gran just let her know how grateful I am that she isn’t a controlling crazy person. All this heartache, this strife, could have been avoided if the gran had loosened up a little sooner.

She raised women who were intellectuals, strong in their own rights, brilliant and business minded and she refused to trust that without the presences of the Y-chromosome in their lives they would be fulfilled and happy.

They all missed out on some of these best years of each other’s lives because of all of them being stubborn to some degree. Only the two sisters remain and in May we will see how Neung and Aneung’s story closes off with season 2.

There are a lot of unresolved feelings, a lot of hurt and a lot of misunderstandings going around but only time will tell if everyone will find their way back to their soulmate.

Stay tuned.

[juniorig0327]

Zeus!Percy (and possible siblings)

So I was thinking about Zeus!Percy and I was thinking about his possible childhood. I actually feel like it would relatively the same since he’s a big three child. He’d probably still have to deal with Gabe and all that but I do feel like his anger issues may be a bit intensified which may lead him to be put in more military schools when he was a child and possibly more fights.

His sense to protect would be greater I feel like which wouldn’t change much, at least not in his childhood.

One thing I do actually want to change is Percy possibly killing Gabe here. Zeus is a god of justice and especially after finding out Gabe hit his mom I feel like Percy might’ve killed Gabe (albeit possibly an accident).

His powers would mostly be control of storm related activities with his two main abilities being heliokinesis (control of the sun) and Atmo/Electrokinesis.

Other aspects and epithets of his powers would be unlocked throughout his quests, with him discovering the chthonic side of Zeus in the BoTL.

So basically Perseus is like a mini Zeus lol.

I think, especially because in the AU I’m considering Thalia to be a child of Apollo (still thinking on this). People would be very afraid of Percy at first, just like in canon and would slowly open up to him, but after his abnormal powers people would sort of stay away from him in fear because it’s like “wtf a child of Zeus isn’t supposed to have these types of powers are they??”

Especially when he shows off less than heroic traits people will stay away from him in this au, although after TLO he’s officially respected, especially after he stood up to his father on the treatment of demigods.

Now as for siblings one I definitely want to do for sure is Ethan as a child of Zeus. I feel like Ethan would be the opposite of Percy. While Percy got all the cool powers and domains, Ethan got nothing besides Zeus’s sense of justice and his war like attributes. He’d feel resentful towards Percy, especially because he wasn’t claimed and he feels like because he was born without powers, Zeus didn’t deem him worthy of being claimed.

Other things I thought of:

- Blue food would most definitely still be a thing.

- Percy controlling Poison is most definitely not going to be a thing, but I am cooking up some ideas, at least for the “dark” side of his powers.

- Being as I’m making him a legacy of Apollo, he still gets the weirdly prophetic dreams which definitely I intend to go a little deeper into. With the potential of alternate futures and Percy seeing it through his dreams (there are three fates after-all)

- Percy isn’t really close with Zeus or most of his siblings, but Poseidon like absolutely loves him. He’s like “woah can I claim this guy??” Just because of how unhinged and unrestrained Percy is going to be lol (even though Poseidon has children of his own).

- Nyx has a weird obsession with him. I thought it was as sort of uninteresting Nyx was interested in Nico. I feel like it would’ve been more interesting if Nyx was interesting in Percy or like someone else, especially because of the growing darkness of Percy in Tartarus. It would also be weirdly uncharacteristic of children of Zeus and I feel like Percy is legit all about breaking the Zeus child stereotypes.

- Percy is so like Zeus in certain ways, like when he’s commanding in battle or when he gets angry he looks so much like Zeus especially in his eyes it’s uncanny.

This is just a random yapping cuz I’m at school rn but tell me what you think in the comments please 🙏

[divinecomedyproductions]

I think I also want to explain my big bias about romance in epics: a heavily opinionated thread

Keep in mind, I’m not trying to throw shade at any indie creators who do this, just trying to explain my style and why

I really don’t like “Star-Crossed” Lovers and “Love interest to be built up and killed off” tropes. Not sure I ever did honesty.

I get why they work, they just don’t work for me. Unless like Peter Parker they get another chance again.

And three franchises were the final straw for me, and what drove me to go indie along with being inspired by indie works of others

First it was RWBY the tragic end of Arkos and what I feared to be sane of Black Sun among others along with the doomed fate of Oscar Pine

I tried to express my distaste of it on tumblr on my past accounts and RWBY wiki discussion forum(big mistake, I know) and I regretted it so much

Never had I met a fanbase so arrogant, self righteous, and sanctimonious about this kind of stuff, going on how amazing these tropes and dark stories like RWBY initially seemed circa V3-Finale along with Madoka Magica and Akame Ga Kill were and sneering at anything even one shade lighter than that

They were either passive-aggressively judging and gaslighting me, or outright lecturing me

How a epic story that has Dork knight and a lonely warrior woman isolated by society crushing on him,  or a unlucky moody girl and sunshine himbo, a doomed hero having a well earned happy ending, especially if it involved resurrection as a good thing was nothing but “pandering”, petty, and worthless and the preference of the weak and cowardly

Even one fan said “people don’t find that interesting, sorry.” And that another fan seemed to stated characters like Pyrrha and Jaune are only fit for tragic endings because “that’s the kind of character she is” both of which these fans spoke as these things were gospel, or they themselves had some kind of storytelling authority

Then I heard about Superman and Lois Lane getting married and having a kid and even Bruce and Selena getting hitched, until hearing both marriages get trashed along with a few others

Along with the defense Dan Didio gave

It was absolutely MADDENING to me

"Heroes shouldn’t have happy personal lives. They are committed to being that person and committed to defending others at the sacrifice of their own personal interests.

That’s very important and something we reinforced. People in the Bat family their personal lives basically suck. Dick Grayson, Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake, Barbara Gordon and Kathy Kane. It’s wonderful that they try to establish personal lives, but it’s equally important that they set them aside. That is our mandate, that is our edict and that is our stand."

Like, these guys want to hopeful, but only in certain ways the pop-culture/literary ‘intellectuals’ deem acceptable as well as what they deem to be ‘interesting’ and what I had in mind did not only not qualify, it was seen as outright heresy

When I brought this up in my grievances with stories like RWBY, one holier-that-thou jerk supported it because 

“Single Batman and Superman sells well”

After writing my preferences off as “pandering” and only for the likes such as Disney and Marvel,

The Self-Centered hypocrisy was staggering because what he said and his many followers were basically saying this;

“We don’t like it when your niche interest stuff is forced into our stuff, but when the case is in the reverse? We’re totally cool with that, and we hope it keeps happening.”

other fans said what I wanted was only for sitcoms, imposing themselves as gatekeepers of *epic storytelling itself*

From where I was standing, there is a growing hatred of couples in epics go through and making it and even getting married and having children, especially those of certain dynamics all under the guise of “hopepunk” and “The Greater Good.” Or whatever the term is now

Prattled on by conceited fandoms who in my opinion, have become a bunch of literary snobs who think way too highly of themselves

Who go around deciding what ways are legitimate “raised stakes” and “consequences”, 

both which might I add are defined by their *own* standards,

along with their own preferences, especially fates for of certain kinds of ships and characters, which they flaunt as “objective” and above those of “the unwashed masses” in order to justify glorifying them as well as themselves for liking them

Which then afterwards these fandoms pressure these standards onto aspiring writers such as myself or be exiled to sitcoms, romcoms, Disney, or Marvel.

Because it’s not “entitlement” if it’s directed at the peasants I guess.

That along with the fact their so insecure and discontent with just being different, they need to feel superior than others for their own preferences

Nor they can’t handle the idea somewhere out there there is story that have characters like the those of the stories they enjoy, but with a different outcome

All epic fiction, its characters, its settings, its themes, its use of its inspirations, the creator’s style needs to begin and end on terms of these self-appointed arbiters who, once again, try to justify by presenting their preferences, tastes, and “personal emotional beats” as objective and superior

And once again: I’m *NOT* saying creators who goes with the tragic romance route are bad or malicious, most of them are just doing their thing

This problem lies with sycophantic individuals among fandoms who appoint their chosen champion’s ways as law and act offended on their behalf, even though they never spoken to these creators personally nor did these creators asked them to pick up a sword in their name and are not held accountable for their behavior

And what’s worse, is that these groups imply epic stories where heroic couples get married and have families are allegedly incompatible outside of Disney or Marvel or else it ends up as terrible story

Which they will imply is the case for stories like DragonBall Z, Sword Art Online, and Naruto/Boruto

But when *their* way of doing things ruins a franchise like DC comics and people complain about it?

It’s the whining of unwashed masses or vocal toxic minority opposed to the enlightened few or informed majority

Because *their* way makes everything better and always will

It’s incredibly self absorbed and narcissistic

So that’s why I’ve been so keen on having my heroes find love, get married and having families. Especially ones who’ve been through so much sorrow.

I’m just weary of this and tired of fandoms telling me when I’m disappointed;

“It’s not for you” and implying “nothing should be for you and everything should be for us”

And I’m certain I’m not the only one who feels this way

You don’t have to share my personal tastes and distaste’s in story beats in epics, once again, I just want you guys to understand.

[visiongoddess]

Free Tarot Readings Info:

Hello! I thought it would be fun to offer some free readings. One thing you need to know is that I’m still learning, and my go-to cards are the manga and Halloween deck.

How does this work?

If you are interested in a free reading, just go to my blog and click the *Free Readings* on the page.

Because of the fact you get the reading via an ask, all readings will be publicly available.

There will be no anonymous asks as I need some idea of who the reading is for.

Also, all you really need to say is “I’m interested in a reading”. If you want to give more information you can, but I won’t answer any specific questions.

Keep in mind that you will at minimum get one card. Depending on what I am getting you may also get multiple cards.

I would also find it very helpful if you could give me some feedback.

Also, as this is not my main account, I don’t check it very often. I will try to check at least once a day; so if you request a reading and it takes me a bit, that is why.

What do I read?

As I am still learning, the type of reading I do is Fate readings. Meaning the reading will be what Fate deems you need to know. There is also a past-present-future reading I do with the rune dice. You can pick a form of reading if something is sticking out to you more than the others, but I will ultimately pick whatever I feel drawn to. Also keep in mind that as I am very much a beginner, I will summarize what the book says and add a bit of what I am feeling.

What cards do I use?

As of right now (10/25/2024) there are a few different ways I can do readings. [note: I will update this as I get more cards, so keep that in mind] •Mystical Manga Tarot

-This is currently my only tarot deck, and the first deck I ever got. If you are looking for a tarot reading, this is the only option you got.

• The Halloween Oracle

-This is my main oracle deck, thus is my go to. I say it’s pretty good if you are looking for a basic reading.

• Astral Realms Crystal Oracle

-This deck has a bunch of different crystals on it. If you get this deck, I would consider either getting or looking into what crystal card you get.

• Oracle of the Mermaids

-I like to consider this my Aphrodite deck. Whenever I want to communicate with her, these are the cards I use.

• Runes

-Technically, there are two different types of rune readings. One just being regular runes and the other being rune dice. I mainly use the rune dice to do past-present-future readings, but may use the regular runes as well.

•Charm Reading

-this is very much new to me, so I will not be doing it as it appears in the photo. If I do a charm readings (which will only be adding to a card reading) I will at random pick a few charms and go from there.

[gacha-incels]

Do you think that there is a possibility of Hypergryph splitting from Yostar for global publishing of Arknights and moving it to Gryphline instead? The traditional Chinese server got moved from Long Chen to Gryphline recently, and the new ambience synesthesia concert merch is on the Gryphline store rather than yostar’s. It may just be wishful thinking as yostar and hypergryph both own large shares of each other, but if there is a planned split from yostar would it potentially be a reason why Hypergryph hasn’t made a statement condemning Yostar Korea’s actions? Is there any precedent for publisher changes for a sort of legal clause preventing them from hurting each others’ image prior to the split being announced?

Gryphline is situated in Singapore, having what I guess you could call a “proxy” company for global business in Singapore is something a lot of companies in China have done for a while, increasingly within the past couple of years, for a multitude of reasons. Last time I checked Mihoyo had “Cognosphere” in Singapore, and when you buy gachabux in that game on servers outside China I believe your bill is from Cognosphere. The slave labor fast fashion site Shein has been operating under the Singapore-registered “Roadget Business” which some have speculated makes it easier to list in the USA. Yostar has HQ in Hong Kong which used to be the proxy location but according to this FT article-“Traditionally, Hong Kong was the choice for many such companies, said Kia Meng Loh, a senior partner at Dentons Rodyk. But with Beijing “flexing its muscles” in the semi-autonomous rival finance hub, Singapore is the obvious next choice, he said.” Hypergryph has multiple games coming out in the near future, I believe a regular (non-gacha) 3D anime mobile game and a 3D Arknights spinoff that will have a weapon gacha, and I think another game that’s TBD? They could be rearranging their internal structure due to this expansion if they’ve switched around their Chinese server already, but I’m unsure if this means they will completely split with Yostar who I believe publishes the US, Japanese and Korean servers.

Admittedly I can’t say I’m super well versed with this type of business and therefore it’s harder to really predict what they will do in the future, but I’ve been watching the situation since AK KR posted that notice to see what happens. I don’t have anything against the game itself, if it comes out that somehow their hands are completely tied in the situation or something I’ll post about that as well but I’m not holding my breath. In terms of my read on the situation, I think a huge message has ready been sent to the fans as to whom the company deems most profitable to listen to, regardless of any future handwringing over the situation. I would think between a woman posting extremely basic feminist thoughts on her personal twitter (equal pay etc) and enjoying the woman’s day google doodle years ago, and the Arknights KR/Yostar employee liking extremely violent fanart on the official twitter account and hanging out on extremist, misogynistic chat boards, that the employee would be seen as more of a problem and should have been the one disciplined. In reality, not only was the woman punished by having her work deleted but the official KR account posted that diatribe calling basic feminism a “dividing force” or whatever. This action and the following statement are absolutely not neutral, especially during a time a which violent misogyny has been increasingly ripping through South Korea as a whole but also gacha games specifically. In terms of PR I do think this is something Hypergryph could address, if HG doesn’t want to rock the boat with Yostar so to speak because of some upcoming split, it seems Yostar has already rocked the boat quite a bit with this action to begin with…

in terms of a main developer punishing the publisher, one example I can think of is Fate/Grand Order’s DelightWorks (after the sakura wars fuckup FGO is developed by “Lasengle” now, but when this happened it was DW) changing an in-game reward that FGO’s Korean publisher Netmarble gave out. In terms of them splitting as well, I’m still looking into it 👍 If anyone knows anything else feel free to reply or send me stuff and I’ll post it, sometimes I feel if I wait too long to reply to messages it comes across as rude lol so I’m not getting lost in like thesis tier research

[hrodvitnon]

Alternative Mothra Characterization

Heya- so one of my favorite Kaiju to write in my own stuff is Mothra; however, my reasoning for why is the very unique way I choose to interpret and write her character (I’ve not seen anyone ever get close to this when writing her). It’s interesting for me, but simultaneously kinda dissonant when I see her characterized differently (To clarify: this is not a bad thing it is actually a very good thing due to both the intensity of my version and that fans having many different interpretations of characters only adds depth to fandom). Anywho- this version of the character goes very hard on the angst, and I figured it may be a cool thing to share because of Abraxas being- Abraxas. Consider this me sharing my method to hopefully inspire additional ideas involving her. 

At her very foundation, this Mothra is very similar to how Mothra is usually presented. Queen to Godzilla, his better half in many ways, infinitely caring for her friends and the planet, etc. However there are some major alterations to the mechanics of her Rebirth Cycle. Whenever she dies- she cannot die in the same way again (she ‘adapts’ to what killed her last and cannot be hurt by it again), each time she does die she loses a seemingly random part of her mind (memories, personality, sense of self, etc), and each time she does die- she becomes more in-tune with the planet and her life (can sense more, becomes more connected to each being, becomes more powerful).

I usually pick up the story in the modern day when she’s died possibly hundreds of times. The consequences of which are discussed below.

The adaptation clause (which I call 8-Fold Wings) adds a new dimension to combat, as her enemies need to figure out what she’s vulnerable to and what she’s already been killed by (fool me once, shame on you). Usually she can manage to beat them before they figure it out- but has to be much more careful when she encounters someone with a unique set of powers.

She’s usually so interconnected to all life that she can sense basically anything, and often takes it upon herself to try and help anyone she senses is in pain for some reason (So I basically do what DA:I did with Cole). I’m sure you can see the sorts of interactions this can often prompt when she launches into an unprovoked therapy session whenever she deems it appropriate. 

Now- onto the heavy stuff. At the point in which the audience meets her, she’s died so much that she’s mentally caught between the afterlife and mortal realm; and can barely remember anything from her past lives properly and often gets things wrong that others will correct her on. 

Speaking of others: it’s usually a very mentally taxing thing for people who know her to be around her (Godzilla, Rodan, Anguirus); as they remember who she used to be- and seeing her now, although she’s got this whimsical air, altruism, and degree of innocence, they can’t help but remember. 

Especially Godzilla. She’s died so many times in sacrifice to him, usually to power him up enough to kill some great threat, or to save his or someone else’s life, that she sometimes even forgets his name. He’s tried to get her to stop- begged her even, but it almost became an addiction to her. She grew so much stronger every time, gained so much knowledge; and each time she dies she does it to help, to save. Despite how much it hurts those around her, she can’t help but keep doing it because she could never bear to see any of them suffer the same fate. Death is a burden she believes only she can bear. She even believes that one day- she will become immortal- after dying in every way possible. Now I personally don’t write them being romantically involved for my own reasons (mostly because mothzilla’s kinda not my thing… Heresy, I know), but you easily could and it would probably be more tragic… Goji forced to watch his wife die countless times and slowly losing herself to the point where she needs to be reminded of who he is. This would tear him apart over the centuries- forcing him to either stay in a tragic relationship with her, unable to let go despite her condition, or him eventually gaining the strength to break it off and pursue something with someone else. You could even a heart-shattering moment when she returns after a death, Godzilla over the moon to see her again until she just tilts her head and him and goes, “Hello! I’m Mothra, don’t believe we’ve met before!”. 

So yeah, my own version of the Monster Queen. Could be another Abraxas timeline where the Rebirth works like this. Hope you got something outta this, whether it be ideas or just a fix of angst. 

(also sorry about doubling up on long submission posts lol. got that gxk on my mind.)

—

I really dig the idea that Mothra can’t die/be killed by the same means twice (perhaps there’s a life she’s lived where she died of old age and is now functionally immortal but can still die in other ways? Another kind of tragic element). I don’t gatekeep shipping tendencies around here, it’s cool. It’s like, I enjoy mint chocolate ice cream but someone else doesn’t, no problem, I’ll have more of the ice cream I like and they’ll have more of the ice cream they like! Win-win!

Oh, and… wow, yeah, the heavy stuff is fascinating and rife with potential angst and dramatic goodness especially where Godzilla is involved, but (and this is a good but), I found my mental playlist of earworms alternating between Die Toteninsel (Emptiness) and Schubert’s Ständchen (or Serenade) the more I read of that last bullet; specifically Schubert because I once watched a video where an opera singer analyzes video game music and intuited that the particular use of Ständchen isn’t really a happy love song but feels more about unrequited love, it feels frustrated, it feels like loss. And since this take on Mothra can tell when someone’s in pain, she goes from happy to introduce herself to who she sees is a complete stranger to all but slapped with a sensation of emotional agony. Oof.

[ash5monster01]

(@he-is-half-my-soul I hope you don’t mind but this post inspired a little something in me because I live for tropes where each of the poets come to terms with Neil’s death)

Trapped in Time

Warnings: mentions of suicide, depression, grief, light swearing, all around sad, and I’m sorry.

Summary: after Neils death and Graduation the Dead Poets make sure to keep in touch, not wanting to risk losing another. They help each other through the grief and remind each other that the powerful play still goes on. When they discover Todd still struggles they band together to do the same for him.

Masterlist

Each of the Dead Poets found themselves in different places after graduation and college. Despite the distance they never lost touch and in the end it was a good thing. They had a shared life experience, one surrounded by turmoil and trauma. Not many people in the world went through what they did. They saw the light at the end of tunnel but before they could get to it they lost a friend, their teacher, and some of them a school. So when the torture of the future they tried so desperately to avoid came crushing down on them they had each other. The only issue being the distance keeping them from seeing things right away.

Luckily for Todd, Charlie had ended up in the city just like him. Todd kept his quiet persona but was less outspoken which worked in favor with Charlie’s still boisterous personality. Todd became an English professor at NYU and Charlie found himself on Wall Street, a shark in the business, his father no longer deeming him incompetent considering he was now more successful than him. Either way the two ended up having each other, only a 30 minute cab ride from the other’s apartment. They met weekly for dinner or lunch and it was always nice to have a familiar face.

Charlie had been uptown for work. Meeting with investors and attending fancy lunches and dinner shows. Basically kissing ass and praying they’d shake on the deal. He was also bitterly annoyed when he had to cancel lunch with Todd and make plans for dinner. This bothered him because Todd didn’t have any classes today and without Charlie he would never leave the house. Todd still needed to learn how to live a little and Charlie figured it was fate he ended up near him stead of any of the other poets. So Charlie with a permanent scowl walked beside his business partner in the Broadway district, annoyed he sat through an entire play just for the investors to say they were considering a different direction. So here he was stuck uptown, annoyed about work, and disappointed he missed lunch with his best friend for something as stupid as that.

“We didn’t need them anyways Charles, we have other investors” Benjamin, his business partner pried as he tried to keep up with him.

“I know, I’m just annoyed they wasted my time. I enjoy theater but that was torture” Charlie grunted, realizing twenty minutes into the show the investors were freaks and knew nothing about real entertainment.

“Yeah I could’ve gone my entire life without seeing that” he agreed, knowing full well he didn’t understand a damn thing that happened the entire time he watched the play.

“Idiots, all of them” suddenly Charlie stopped, Benjamin practically running in to him from trying to keep up the entire time.

“Woah, why we stopping?” Benjamin caught his balance and moved back from Charlie where he almost knocked him face first to the cement.

“Todd?” Benjamin looked up to see Charlie catching the attention of a blonde gentleman stepping out of the theater.

“Charlie, what’re you doing on Broadway?” Todd meekly asked, the brunette boy approaching him. Charlie assessed the situation, surprised to see Todd out, that was until he looked up at the sign above the theater. A Midsummer Nights Dream.

“I should be asking you the same thing” he said, trying to read any emotions coming from the boy. Todd went to speak but was caught of abruptly.

“Mr. Anderson, you forgot your coat” a theater worker rushed from the doors, holding out his jacket. Todd happily accepted it. “Maybe you wouldn’t forget it if you stayed till the end of the show for once”

“Thank you Margaret” Todd acknowledged her, wincing slightly that he was caught red handed by Charlie.

“Margaret” Charlie stopped the woman from walking away and she turned with a smile. “How long have you been putting on this show?”

“About a month and a half now. Mr. Anderson here enjoys it so much he comes once a week, sometimes twice if we’re lucky” Todd’s shoulders fell and Charlie nodded and thanked her as she disappeared back into the theater.

“Do you want to explain?” Charlie pressed, Todd struggling to make eye contact with him.

“You know I don’t” Charlie sighed, pressing a hand to his face. Benjamin stood confused but patiently waited nonetheless.

“Do you know how bad this looks? Todd why would you do this to yourself?” Charlie wanted to cry. He never ever wanted to relive that night again. To this day it was still the worst 24 hours of his life and here Todd was trying to relive it.

“I don’t know Charlie?! I just do” Benjamin was surprised to hear someone refer to the man as Charlie and not Charles. Sighing Charlie turned to his business partner.

“Head back to the office, let Clarice know to clear my schedule the rest of the day. I have to deal with this” Benjamin nodded, feeling he already peeked to far into Charlie’s personal life than he ever wanted too. With zero hesitation he rushed off, ready to finish his workday.

“I need you to explain this to me Todd, or else I can’t help you” Charlie pleaded and Todd sighed as he looked down to the coat in his arms.

“Can we at least sit down?” he asked and Charlie nodded, starting back on his pace as he bustled down the city sidewalks to a diner that was sure to appear. He grimaced at the Worlds Best Coffee sign in the window that every diner in this God forsaken city seemed to have.

“You want to explain it now?” Charlie asked as he went to take a sip of the worlds best coffee. Todd kept his gaze on the table, not wanting to meet his eyes.

“It started when you had to cancel lunch since something got messed up at work. I didn’t want to sit home so I went for a walk. That’s when I saw the sign. At first I wanted to run away but then I realized I hadn’t seen the play since that night. I practically knew it word for word since Neil made me run lines with him every chance we got. It felt like I watched it yesterday even though I hadn’t seen it in years” Charlie felt his heart tighten. They had all been at the play but Todd was the one who practiced with him. Todd played every part alongside Neil’s Puck.

“So you went inside?” Charlie egged on, needing to know the dark thoughts in the boys head. They all struggled with the shadow of grief, it’s overbearing weight crushing their shoulders over the smallest things. For Charlie it was soccer. Him and Neil had played together since children and after he died he never played or watched again.

“I figured it would be a good thing. Give myself a new memory but then the end came. It was Pucks big speech and suddenly I couldn’t breathe. That was Neil’s moment, I remember cheering so loud my lungs hurt, then I remembered it was pretty much the last thing I ever heard him say. So I ran out, too afraid to relive it” Todd said and this made Charlie more confused.

“If it was too hard why did you go back?” he asked, leaning forward on the table wanting to know where this was going.

“I wanted to find the strength to finish it. I never could though. After a while it became less about finishing it and more about getting lost in the play. Feeling like that 17 year old kid again who just saw his best friend follow his dreams. It felt like when Neil was still alive” this answer hit Charlie like a ton of bricks. This was torture and he had gone too long without realizing Todd was trapped in an endless cycle of torment.

“Todd-” Charlie held his face in his hands, not knowing what to say. He wasn’t prepared for this, this was worse then having nightmares about that night or crying when it all became too much.

“I know, I know I need to stop. It’s hard though, when I’m home with nothing to do I started remembering and getting upset and when I sit in that play for at least an hour it’s as if nothing ever happened” Todd told him and Charlie nodded, understanding wanting to feel like the people they were before tragedy struck.

“You can’t go back Todd, if you ever find yourself needing to go you call me. I’ll cancel whatever I’m doing, say it’s a family emergency because you’re the only family I have Todd and I can’t let this consume you” Todd nodded, feeling guilty for having kept this secret for so long.

“Okay, I promise” with a content nod Charlie accepted this answer, not needing to have anymore depressing conversation.

After they ate their meals and Charlie made sure Todd got home he found himself unable to stop thinking about what Todd had been doing. Tugging his tie from his neck and getting ready for bed he kept going over it, again and again, wanting to understand how he could put himself through that. Yet the longer he thought about it he realized how little closure they all got. The days after Neil’s death were filled with so many things. In a matter of a few days they went through losing a friend from suicide, a funeral, their teacher getting fired, and for Charlie, getting kicked out of school. Everyone was so focused on finding who to blame, including the Poets, that none of them ever came to terms with the fact that Neil was really gone. So with this in mind he came up with an idea.

Putting the plan together wasn’t hard. Using his connections he found a way. So even though Todd thought this was just a normal dinner for the two of them he actually had no idea what was to come. So Charlie knocked on his door, signature smirk proud on his face as he waited for Todd to open it.

“Hey Charlie-” Todd froze as he saw not only Charlie but Knox, Chris, Meeks, and Pitts standing behind him. “What’s this?”

“We’re all going to dinner, and a show” Charlie reached forward and Todd saw the familiar ticket in his hand. When Charlie had reached out to the boys and told them about what was happening they all agreed immediately to help Todd through this. After all every single one of them needed it too.

“I thought it was a bad idea” Todd said, already growing nervous at the thought.

“I did. I still do. Then I realized the reason you felt that way about the play was because you never got closure. None of us did. So we’re gonna stay to the end, and hopefully when we all get through it we will feel a bit better” Charlie said before stepping to the side and gesturing to follow them out. Todd nodded, still nervous as they left his apartment and made their way out to the loud streets.

It was like deja vu sitting in those seats all together again. Every single one of them remembered the night like yesterday. Charlie nearly jumped as the orchestra started in the pitch black of the theater. Knox squeezed Chris’ hand like his life depended on it. Todd tried to settle his nerves as they waited for it to start. When the actor who played Puck appeared it was as if the whole group couldn’t breathe. He had the same look in his eyes that Neil did all those years ago and Charlie felt himself begin to cry. Pitts and Meeks looked at him with sympathy as they all faced this nightmare together. Suddenly Todd’s hand appeared on Charlie’s back and gave it a comforting rub.

When the end of the play approached Charlie felt the air surrounding him thin. There it was, the feeling Todd had described. This was the last moment they saw their friend with a smile on his face. When he came out for that final bow and looked so fucking proud. Their friend who deserved the world and everything it had to offer because if anyone of them deserved to be in this world so did he. So Charlie sucked in a breath and kept his eyes on Todd who looked like he wanted to flee his seat. All six of them grabbed hands and prepared for it to end and the curtain to drop.

“If we have unearned luck. Now to 'scape the serpent's tongue, We will make amends ere long; Else the Puck a liar call; So, good night unto you all. Give me your hands, if we be friends, And Robin shall restore amends” chills filled their bones as the last line was spoken and the curtain dropped. As Charlie turned to Todd he saw the boy absolutely broken, sobs raked his body. The boys all wrapped themselves around him in a hug. Bystanders clearly confused by their emotional behavior but this was a beautiful moment for the group. They faced their demons and they did it together.

“See Mr. Anderson, the end is beautiful” Margaret said as the exited the theater and he smiled at her.

“It really is, thank you Margaret” Todd told her and she waved as the group followed him out the doors.

“That was intense” Knox sighed, his arm wrapped tightly around his wife.

“I never realized how heavy that moment was until now” Meeks muttered pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

“Neil would’ve loved this, going to Broadway and seeing the shows. Hell even being in them” Charlie said and the group nodded as they reminisced their friend.

“He’s with us now, I know it” Pitts smiled and Todd looked up at the sky, barely any stars visible, a violet haze around the earth.

“He changed my life, I wish he would’ve stuck around to see how it turned out” Todd muttered and Charlie tugged him in a hug, thankful he could help his friend.

“He was my best friend, my first friend. The only guy who put up with me until I met you dorks” Charlie said as he pulled away.

“His heart was too big, he would’ve given each of us the world if he could” Knox told them and Chris smiled, never having met their beloved friend. But she remembered him in that play, it was the best local theater she had ever seen and despite not knowing him she knew he would’ve changed the world.

“To Neil, and us. Remember the powerful play goes on and we may contribute a verse”

[westiec]

Hello! Please tell me about Qin Su's slutty adventure, because she deserves it. (I also want to know about JYL and tentacles as well as the magical boyfriend journal) :D

Hello! You hit a trio of team efforts. 👀

Qin Su's Slutty Adventures is a delightfully filthy porn-logic romp @maniibear and I have written like... half-ish of wherein Qin Su, having <handwaves> discovered the truth of her parentage ahead of schedule and perhaps engaged in a little light parricide with her brothers, decides that her next goal is to strengthen inter-sect relationships. Carnally. Her brothers are happy to help meimei achieve her dreams. 😌 It's basically "you've heard of slut shaming but what about slut praising huh?": the fic.

[INCEST WARNING]

A puff of laughter greets her lips, and then slender, callused fingers slide along her jaw and into her hair. The hand is too small to be Jin Zixuan’s, and the calluses are wrong to be Jin Guangyao’s. She shivers in excitement at the realization that for the first time, they’ve brought her someone new. Their lips are soft, teasing against her own, and she's dizzy just from the kiss, so turned on that it's finally happening, that her geges have deemed her ready. She moans a little when they pull away, and her partner gives a low, amused chuckle. When the blindfold is removed, she looks up to see the smirking face of Luo Qingyang, cheeks flushed and eyes hot. "Don't think we didn't remember everyone on your list, meimei," Jin Zixuan says, kneeling behind Qin Su to untie the sash at her waist. "Mianmian was very excited to help us get you ready." "Can't be cultivation society's favorite slut if you don't know your way around a pussy," Luo Qingyang says with a wink. “It will be my genuine pleasure to help you in your ambitions, Qin-guniang.”

[/end incest warning]

JYL tentacle friend is a very sketchy PWP idea @theleakypen and I have discussed wherein a friendly cephalopod with some mental projection powers squeezes its entire body into a cavity she did NOT expect it to fit. 🫢🐙

And Zhancheng Magic Boyfriend Journal is an unfinished modern AU with @bideroo where Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji are each gifted a diary that is enchanted to link with that of your soulmate so you can exchange anonymous messages. Here's JC's opening salvo:

Well, I’ll give them this, the commitment to verisimilitude is impressive. I’m pretty sure this is bullshit, but if there’s actually someone on the other end of this, hi, I guess.

My name is ncuk47^÷&×hdj7hka(@

You can call me hdk^63$(zws<@=p

hdk^63$(zws<@=p

Wow, for a journal that’s supposed to help us find our “fated one,” you’d think they’d be a little less zealous with the redacting.

MAN WHAT IF WE FINISHED THINGS HUH? Thank you for the ask!

WIP Title Game

[katyspersonal]

That one interpretation about Micolash’s fate now lives rent free in my head. I’m not opposed to the notion of him dying once and for all, and I like the irony of a scholar obsessed with the pursuit of knowledge spending his last moments in ignorance. But being forever trapped in his own mummified body seems like the perfect punishment and suits the theme of hopelessness so well. For someone who despised his humanity so much, who went above and beyond to escape the limitations of his body, being forced back into his pathetic, frail, powerless body must be pure torture. Once Micolash’s consciousness is brought back, he’ll have all eternity to ponder over the fact that his efforts were fruitless and he’s nothing but a withered corpse, a manifestation of human fragility and mortality. But in contrast to the situation with Lovecraft’s priest, there’ll be nobody around to destroy his brain and end his sufferings.

No, this is absolutely valid, and from the standpoint of a person that gives "proper" judgement to Bloodborne characters - yeah, he "deserved" it!

I just have a completely different way to look at the things, and Soulsborne games offer me the most freedom in this. Like I said, the whole theme of 'fate worse than death' applied to the war criminals we meet in these games just doesn't do anything to me. Doesn't make me mad (because, again, they probably "deserve" it) but also doesn't really excite me... The problem with Soulsborne settings is that things are so chaotic and flipped upside down that morality, principles and and judgement as we know them no longer apply in my opinion- heck, I always said I can't really guilt characters like Aldrich or Rykard for how much atrocities they've committed, because the world they're in is so fundamentally broken and doomed that in the end, what they'd have to do to escape it no longer matters...? Elden Ring didn't touch upon it well enough, and even gave us *gasp* OPTIMISM!!!!, but Dark Souls totally falls for this... mess.

On the other hand, characters like Allant or Shabriri in my interpretation I'd totally say deserved "real" judgement. And Micolash is kinda complicated... He falls exactly in the middle. Dude did quite the unthinkable things to break free from the humanity, but also his setting kinda falls for the trope of "humanity is doomed anyways" and his only fault is that he tried to escape, whatever it takes, rather than pull the whole 'I will perish but at least not lose my human decency uwu' thing. For most people, choosing the latter feels like an axiom and they don't need reasoning to why it is "the only acceptable way", but for this type of high IQ investigators not necessarily so. Because hooooow many tiiiiimes you fuckers need an evidence that huge intellect caaaaaan be as much of a cuuuuuurse.

But, again, Bloodborne setting is less obviously... that. Dark Souls IS doomed, yes. Bloodborne is, like... well, he is (presumably) stuck in the city that will wither under endless cycle of the hunt no matter what. So I speculate his problem (and many other characters') is witnessing the knowledhe humans were not meant to see - and losing the sight of worth of his humanity as a result. Again, the smarter you are - the more damaging this effect will be! More simple-minded people would be able to withstand the comprehension of futility of humanity and the cyclic trap that deems both beasthood and Kinship meaningless because "but humanity is still important just because". (Also love how Bloodborne itself addresses this complexion by the fact that the higher person's Insight level is, the stronger Frenzy damage they take!)

__________________

Basically, what I am saying is, this is a "satisfying" fate for Micolash by common logic.. But I personally would rather either let the guy die a real death, or let him be reborn into something else. His setting and the things he learned make his pursuit to transcend humanity at all cost not only fair in my eyes, but even couragerous, in a way. Actually.....

^^^ what really skewed my perspective on most of the Soulsborne's "war criminals" was Miyazaki himself perceiving Fauxsefka as a heroine xD I was instantly able to decipher it as the fact that her courage is doing a 'morally reprehensive' thing (turning people into cosmic Kin) for the greater good (so they lose any chance to become the beasts instead). Not everyone will "dirty" their own hands for some greater idea. But, yeah, Micolash is likely not 'heroic', as he simply cared for helping himself. The only other Mensis scholar we know of is Damian, who actively works against Mico's goals (which is very telling); the other participants of his ritual are prisoners (damn, Miyazaki, can we go against the dilemma of "deciding for everyone else" for ONE game??).

I am glad that you've found a resolution for Micolash's arc that is very satisfying and exciting for you, though! This sorta thing always feels cathartic!