#so it was Peak Lesbianism yknow

[songofwizardry]

went to see hannah gadsby's latest show (woof!) last night, and i firmly believe that they are one of the greatest contributions to the institute of lesbianism (TM).

[sweeneydino]

....

huh?

Yknow. Sure. I'm just gonna go finish some stuff...

Edit: oh hey, karais gf-

Edit 2: lol, Mikey liking shinigami and she is absolutely not interested. Peak lesbian.

Fishface just became creepy as fuck, flirting with April... bruh

The day people find out I can like a character and also hate them sm will be fun

So many interesting concepts to expand on, and I worry for whatever impromptu "therapist" Shredder has because wtf is wrong with this guy-

"You're dad is one messed up freak", I have a favorite character everyone. (Right behind ICK)

Oh, Leo, committing crime with your sister and her gf, and I'm choosing to ignore that raph comment or else I'll have an aneurysm.

Edit 2.222: I lied, I have no favorites. But bebop and rocksteady are definitely on it I did.

Alright, I'm done rambling for a bit. Might make more spikeangelo stuff because of this lol.

[the-90s-music-colosseum]

Round 2 Group A Match 4

expand for propaganda ↓ (major wall-of-text warning. don't say I didn't warn you) (nazi reference has been removed)

KD Lang:

"She's a lesbian (+100 points) and she was just really hot back then (+10000 points)"

"incredibly clear, sensual mezzo soprano voice -- kd lang's music literally transports you into the narrative of the song. they have a very charismatic appeal that makes them very attractive amazing bone structure and i love the short, choppy hair on top of that their fashion sense is peak, from the 1992 miss chatelaine ballroom dress to the suit on the august 1993 vanity fair cover to the shoulder-length hair and orange jacket on 1995's "all you can eat" i would literally give my life for kd lang i'm obsessed"

"VOTE KD LANG IF YOU LOVE LESBIANS. (AND YOU SHOULD LOVE LESBIANS)"

Jarvis Cocker:

"if jarvis wins I'm mailing him my underwear"

"I just want to tuck him in bed and read to him fairytales while he sips a cup of cocoa please is that to much"

"Jarvis Cocker and Jesus Christ share the same initials so that means that they are one flesh meaning that if you love Jesus you love Jarvis and vice versa"

"jarvision the best division 🫡"

"if jarvis wins I'll read The Hobbit in latin"

"I flew to London a couple of weeks ago and the first thing that I did was take the tube to waterstones picadilly and spend there about an hour looking for jarvis' book that they didn't have. Then I made my way (in the rain without an umbrella) to Foyles to see if they had it there and, again, they didn't have it."

"he's 6'3"

"I have never been more sexually attracted to a man than Jarvis cocker in the this is hardcore mv. I want to flatten him out with a rolling pin like pizza dough and then smack him against the wall. I am so horny I should be shot."

"Everytime I see jarvis cocker videos or pics I twirl my hair, kick my legs and giggle uncontrollably. Or I bite my arm and scream. I'm so mesmerised by his beautiful doe eyes and his weird dances that often lean very sexual. He's everything"

"the way jarvis' body is built is just extraordinary yknow like his spindly buglike legs"

"all I want in life is to take a shower with him and wash that greasy ass lice looking hair for once"

"Jarvis Cocker's last name is Cocker = he should win cuz cock haha"

"I want to spoon-feed him my grandma's chicken soup"

"I want to cock you jarvis <3333333"

"hottest most delicious looking man on earth"

"I didn't rant about him in English lang for him not to win"

"I love him a lot he looks like an insect ♥️"

"Jarvis cocker this is hardcore mv. No guillotine could take away the sloppy, disgusting, throbbing, dripping head I would give that man"

"never wanted a man so bad in my life, he looks like a pretty girl whilst having such a nice deep northern sheffield voice, i want him so bad i'm gonna be genuinely upset if my future bf doesn't look like him"

"apparently a girl he had slept with noted that he made sure that he satisfied all her needs in bed IM JUST GONNA LEAVE THIS INFO HERE AND YOU DO WHAT YOU WANT WITH THAT CUZ"

"need to have car sex with him whilst moving his greasy bangs out the way with my fingers"

"i went all the way to ireland to cure my hyperfixation but im still dreaming about the insect man 😍 i want to do the dishes with him"

"Jarvis is the kind of man that will tell you in explicit detail how much he likes to be pegged"

"currently smashing his sheffildian buttocks"

"I'd like to put my head on his shoulder right by his neck and just stay there, with his somewhat shaved beard making contact with my face and some strands of his hair coming loose and caressing me"

"is it zoophilic of me to say that I'm attracted to his insect looking way"

"Jarvis is everything! 90s Jarvis is a sarcastic smart bitter horny devil. 2000s Jarvis is a romantic fool. Current Jarvis? Lyrically, he is still both the horniest and most romantic and imho has the sexiest speaking voice of his generation. I used to listen to his BBC 6 radio show and when he said my name on air during their listener special I lost my goddamn mind. Celebrate the anniversary of it annually."

[rookflower]

Cindersand???

i like it as a better "cinderpelt's unreciprocated crush" alternative than cinderfire because i'm firmly of the opinion that cinderfire is better purely platonic and lesbian cinderpelt is peak, but ultimately it runs into the same problem i have as cinderfire where cinderpelt in tpb is written (for the first part at least) as a younger child compared to the rest of firestar's friend group, so even though they're not technically that far apart in age it is really weird to me if the feelings are mutual at all. like sure she's not cinderpelt's first teacher, but she IS older than him so same thing, yknow?

(tldr yes if one-sided, definitely not if requited)

[windypuddle]

enstars headcanons

ok im going in order but i dont have headcanons for a few characters for sure. so. whatever on we go . just saying in advance these are mostly gender and Autism

fine:

eichi tenshouin: look i cant say anythinf about this guy hes already canonically terminally ill and gay. like what do you want me to do

wataru hibiki: genderfluid. whatever gender fits the performance. shes the moment hes the star theyre the epitome of an actor

tori: boy you are so gnc. princess but not a girl you know

yuzuru: has definitely had impulse thoughts about dying his hair and having a scene phase at 3 am

trickstar

hokuto: bigender. sooooo queer . also autistic

mao: um ritsu braided his hair sometimes when they were younger

ryuseitai:

chiaki: trans guy i have many feelings about this but he leans into the hero thing because its gender affirming. also autism

kanata: no gender only blublublub. likes wearing long skirts. filipino. has like 1 million fish earrings. also autism

tetora: TRANSMASC ‼️💥💪

midori: transfem... also autistic.. she is so important

shinobu: Autism Autism Autism. bonus the detachment from gender that sometimes comes with the autism but he hasnt really thought about it. hes just some guy

alkaloid:

hiiro: transmasc autistic i will die on this hill

aira: my lovely mutuals have convinced me with blasian aira its canon to me now. white french? no. cowards happyele are cowards i tell you. theres such a vast portion of the francophone world that is not white . also transmasc

mayoi: scaredgirl weirdboy core. whatever gender is easier at the moment. she likes being pretty

tatsumi: ok yknow what. fuck it. aroace tatsumi

eden:

nagisa: so much autism. nonbinary guy. religious trauma

ibara: lesbian. not going to elaborate bc thats not my problem ibara is just a lesbian

hiyori: hes just gay idk what to tell you. cisboy gay who is so annoying. when people complain about "gay isn't a personality trait" theyre complaining about him. also chubby

jun: also gay but fans love him for being normal about it. one of his main motivations for working out is being able to princess carry hiyori. hes so polite usually its insane but with eden he doesnt care because he loves them so hes a bit of a bitch

valkyrie:

shu: god is a woman and her name is shu itsuki. transfem and autistic i will Also die on this hill.

mika: transmasc and autistic

2wink:

hinata: men liker but dont ask me about her gender idk

yuuta: i see those slipups in twin peaks girl u are transfem nonbinary i think

crazy:b:

rinne: bigender [wild cheering] also demi aka down bad for niki specifically

niki: tboy swag but hes not really bothered too much about medically transitioning. arospec i think

himeru: Sooooo nonbinary. so so so nonbinary. i like to hc afab nonbinary himeru and mainly got top surgery to more easily pass as kaname but like gahdamn of course you have blue hair and pronouns (they/it/no pronouns)

kohaku: tboy swag . the gender in crazy:b is off the charts

Undead:

rei: 1 million genderqueer and SO gay. has all the problems of an older sister but also the hotness that comes with issues u know.

kaoru: ok. bear with me. aussie. also transfem... like what do you mean you hate men and only hang out with girls. definitely arospec

koga: AUTISM!! weirdgirl to autism boy wonder transmasc swag pipeline

adonis: also autism. he can be gnc. as a treat

akatsuki:

keito: come on man we all know youre gay and insufferable about it

kuro: he should get to have piercings i think

souma: autism boy wonder. while you were busy learning social cues he was studying the blade. also applies to gender norms

ra*bits:

nazuna: boy there is something gender going on with you. weirdboy or maybe a gender cis people have never heard of.

tomoya: That Is The Normalest Girl I've Ever Seen

mitsuru: autism

hajime: girl what is your gender. hes like the narrator of the arch nemesis cynthia post. so poor they cant afford a gender

knights:

tsukasa: autistic and please please please let him be chubby. staring at happyele with my biggest saddest eyes Please let tsukasa be chubby. while you're at it can he wear a skirt. please

leo: ok i give a lot of characters autism because i have autism and i get it but i think leo has adhd

izumi: agender. any pronouns. idk what to tell you he said in next door that he doesnt care about gender only beauty

arashi: only normal one in knights. i love aranee she should get 1 million hours to stress bake if she wants to

ritsu: ah i understand why vampires are gay. occasionally a girl if its funny

switch:

natsume: Diversity win!! the angry witch is transmasc!!! neurodivergent but i think its funnier if i dont specify.

tsumugi: new gender unlocked its pathetic wifeguy. hes every spirit in the fields of punishment and he does it willingly for natsume

sora: wahoo autism ^_^ yippee!!

madara: is cowboy a gender?

feel free to reblog and throw in ur own headcanons i love hearing other fans hcs it is so awesome!!

[butchtwelfthdoctor]

butch twelve has been taking over my whole brain as of late. you r so correct

-@doctoreighth

YEAGH hehe like once i started thinkning about him as a he/him butch i can never stop hehe like twelveclara?? toxic yuri to me. twissy??? only lesbians (or sapphic, yknow) have that level of psychosexual drama for a pairing that kiss each other once for funsises (well. fun for missy) and then once in a distinctly non romantic fashion BEFORE !! they've even had their most emotionally compelling arc. even twelve & bill like thats dyke2dyke communication going on there some of the first things she ever says to him was 'i had a massive crush on this girl i saw in the canteen' with like zero context and neither of them are thrown by that hehe. and not even just with relationships like! some of his s9 clothes especially are peak butch outfits hehe

[myopicry]

a spiteful little rant about petty real life circumstance~

picking the absolute worst time to peak as I essentially fully start a new role as management for a very "queer" organization (it's like a school sponsored writing publication) on my campus...whoops! in my defense, I had yet to peak when I applied for the job and got it, and was actively still seeking to transition. ironically though, right after I got hired, that's when all the fun catalysts for my peakening happened! the universe plays funny games sometimes with timing.

anyway...the point of this relentless blogposting is that my boss/head of management is a self defined "transfemme" who I watched actively go from they/them to she/her in the span of a few months, and I have just had the fascinating reveal (not shocking, really) that they are a "lesbian" and apparently, this is well known among the management to where people joke their entire personality is being gay and talking about lesbians and man. I really hate to be like this but. it's a little awkward to watch someone who isn't female define themselves with being such a "lesbian" !!! again, what a fun nod from the universe that the second I accept my own same-sex attraction, but I still have all this damn baggage from trying to repress it for so long as well as a new profound loneliness based off my opinions being very isolating from my peer group, I am immediately confronted with the exact concept that I have just been peaked on!! wow!! and especially since I still struggle with even thinking of myself as a lesbian since I've had such dumb, incidental, regrettable and based-on-insecurity experiences with men, watching someone categorically not same-sex attracted be so flippantly defined as the gayest of all gays and so quirky for liking to kiss girls (I'm not mad at all that I'm basically stuck in the closet due to my family situation/location in the states and will probably never be able to be so casual with my attraction because a lot of the people around me still see it as unnatural haha <- lying about not being mad)

worst part and maybe the objectively whiniest and pettiest part of this post is this person apparently is poly and has multiple girlfriends! which they brag about! oh boy!

it all just reminds me of how I used to just not know about any of this, but now I can't help but notice how casual jokes like "I like girls in a lesbian way" are made by trans women online, and how...weird...it feels? yknow, I just want to actually let myself feel love for once after a whole teenage saga of disassociating myself from my body and subjecting myself to degrading relationships because I thought that was the only way I could live, and be in a relationship that makes me feel what everyone else feels so damn easily because the world is catered towards their desires and not mine! but sure, I guess these quirky amabs can just suddenly become so gay and sapphic and whatnot just with a simple change of the pronouns and somehow become the face of the identity I can still barely stand to claim from my lack of experiences but one that eats me up inside with the pain of unfulfillment regardless!

okay, I'm clearly losing the thread here and I admit this is fully written from an impulsive, spite-fueled reaction, but what's an anonymous tumblr blog for if not making my problems everyone's problem because I obviously can't vent about this in real life! in a way, this is better than letting the resentment fester? I can just vent it out and subject my lovely followers to maybe seeing this? wow, I love tumblr.com?

if you did read this, you're a damn saint and I hope you have an amazing whatever time of day it is where you live <3

[rontra]

@lizarr7 replied to your post “@lizarr7 replied to your post “yknow it’s...”:

The reason I think that I could not wrap my head around her is that my only exposure to Helena was in the show arrow in which she is HB aka huntress. Not related to the batfam at all. So when it appeared there were multiple versions of BOTH helenas and they didn't even have separate aliases, I just started to lose my mind.

NO BUT SERIOUSLY THOUGH.... like once i started Looking i was like "oh OK i got this, easy" BUT ITS SUPER FUNNY FROM AFAR?? theyre like "yeah so these characters look really similar and use the same alias and have the same first name but Don't get confused. they're completely different people." CAN I...PLEASE...????

@lizarr7 replied to your post “@lizarr7 replied to your post “yknow it’s...”:

Oh and um. Who the FUCK are Batgirl and Batwoman then????

(GRIPPING MY HEAD) AHH UHHHHH OH GOD WELL THEY'RE NOT HELENA WAYNE DOES THAT HELP AT ALL,

i know there's been a few different Batgirls. its a name with some Legacy Clout. but i don't actually know anything about it. if i ever get really into Batgirl comics i'll get back to you. MSDFHJBDS

im looking at this like oh i cannot explain batgirl to Myself let alone somebody else 😭 I THINK RIGHT NOW THERE'S TWO OF THEM? I THINK THERE'S BATGIRLS? THEY'RE LIKE SHARING? <- clueless

for some reason tumblr REALLY thinks i'm interested in batgirl posts specifically (maybe it's extrapolating my helena wayne posting into "you like bats and girls in general"?) so my For You is like FULL of batgirl content but i don't know or understand any of it so i just scroll past. but based on that i think there might be 2 of them.

i know barbara gordon was like famously shot by The Fucking Joker (i witnessed this when wondermagic were kissing) and switched her alias to Oracle (i think?????) so maybe she passed Batgirl to??? those two???? 🥺 (<- face of the hopelessly lost diesel) I ALSO DONT KNOW IF ANY OF THEM ARE RELATED TO BATMAN OR IF THEY JUST LIKE. KNOW HIM

i dont know my batwoman history either so she probably has a predecessor but as far as I'M concerned the only Batwoman is iconic lesbian kate kane whom i DO know by name and sight. she's cool. she's like peak "character i haven't actually read but i feel Strong Fondness towards whenever i see" because shes so fucking cool. batwoman is the one with the really strong black+red theme. you know she's the canon lesbian because her visuals radiate swag. anyway i'm willing to get into batwoman comics for the vibe alone. perhaps someday

but none of them are helena wayne. i know that much. everyone please believe in my ability to identify helena wayne, even if you believe nothing else. (dc wiki immediately reveals to me a "possible future" type au where a helena wayne uses the batwoman name) OH FUCK!!!! MY ABILITY!!!!

[no1ryomafan]

I read on one of your posts that you haven't watched any Gundam shows because many are 40+ episodes, is that correct?

If you have any interest in Gundam, but it's the length that's the problem, would you like a list of Gundam shows that are the equivalent of 25 episodes (or less)?

Oh I’m a aware of the shorter length gundam shows-someone one rec war out of pocket to me and I def know about gwitch-which I could def do but the issue rn is im more *inclined* to wanna watch the longer ones yknow? Like I hear how good gwitch and I def applaud it for the lesbians but my brain is being more itched by older Gundam. Usually I wouldn’t care for older iterations due to length-I have not sit down to watch any of Nagais toei super robot shows and I don’t think I’ll ever watch those in full-but for Gundam it feels super significant if I check out UC at some point bc I do wanna know the OG cast given they feel the most crucial. (If I didn’t bother to get to know Amuro it be like if I exclusively avoided series without Ryoma or Koji in them, he’s a pretty big deal) But also stuff like G fighter and Turn A seem very interesting and are at the peak of when cel animation was gorgeous. (Not to say gwitch doesn’t look incredible either, it does, but I have a little cel bias)

So while I appreciate you wanting to send me a list I still don’t think it’s gonna be awhile before I touch a Gundam because I really don’t think I’ll get the full experience if I don’t try to finish at least one long one. If it ever does to prove to be too much and I drop it-which is worst case scenario-I’ll definitely look into the shorter ones though. (Though I also sadly don’t know when any of this will be as much as I’d like to do it some point this year cause uh- my fourth college semester just started and two of my classes are just watching movies so it’s been a struggle to wanna watch anything 💀)

[mizufae]

Dream Stranger Things S5 look highlights (please make fanart I beg of you):

Steve with a thick mid-80s mustache, but otherwise channeling Tony from Who’s the Boss with soft sweaters and belted jeans, peak dad despite being 20.

Robin goes full Duckie from Pretty in Pink with fun hats, bolo ties, oversized blazers with cuffed sleeves, and those little round shades, so we can finally get Duckie and Andie together they’re just lesbians named Robin and Vickie.

Mike gets a climactic hair cutting drama scene so for the rest of the season he has an absolute mess on his head. Also he’s got a grandpa sweater again, with red and yellow colorwork, with a blue plaid flannel underneath, acid wash jeans that don’t quite reach the ankles of his loooong legs, and fuck off hiking boots, for kicking. Basically, a hot mess on the edge but armored in things that make him feel safe.

El dresses like Hopper had babies with a mall because she kept all his clothes after he died but could only bring herself to wear them when that was proven to be an exaggeration. She belts his giant shirts and has colorful leggings on underneath. Boots also, for stomping. Pleat front trousers cuffed seventeen times and tucked in band tshirts stolen from Jonathan. Erica gives her a bunch of sparkly clips to corral her short curls.

Will wearing all his brightest colors because he is fucking angry and done hiding. Rust red canvas utility vest with pockets full of ammo, torn corduroys patched with mismatched flannel on the inside, vintage Nike running shoes like Anthony Michael hall had in the breakfast club (they are blue with a yellow swoosh!), polo with striped sleeves and contrast collar. The haircut stays, because I’ve come around to it, and if you can’t love him at his bowlcut you don’t deserve him at his literally any other hair ever.

At some point, to sneak into the hospital after visiting hours, Lucas steals some scrubs and a white coat. Then he gets roped into supernatural events so for the rest of the season he looks like a very tired and muddy black Doogie Houser MD. Nobody is around to help maintain his flat top so he trims it round and ends up with super cute short twists from constantly finger curling it because anxiety.

Erica steals Lucas’ season 2 look and wears an American flag bandana as a headband.

Dustin is deep in his feels, ditches the cheerful overshirts and pun hats. Layers, tshirt with flannel with hooded sweatshirt with denim jacket, hood up. Camo cargo pants. Every pocket full of supplies, batteries, pliers, a fair few knives, multi tools, extraneous plugs and wires, an entire med kit distributed. Knife in his boot. Dark green hat, no embroidery.

Nancy in a pink and teal windbreaker. Also she should be in her battle stripes, maybe a black and white zig zag sweater? A vertical striped shoulder padded blazer? That’s a bit 90s but yknow, liberties. But I want the whoosh whoosh whoosh of a windbreaker while she meaningfully strides towards an enemy with a murder glare.

At some point El finds Max in her mind, and they talk to each other in the void while wearing abysmal hospital gowns. And just like in S3 Max is like “wtf we need makeovers” so she thinks of the coolest fucking outfit imaginable for herself (something very cali, definitely involving a red leather jacket, very glorious hair) and gets to wear that the rest of the season.

[madefate-a]

don’t reblog // happy comin out day i’m doing what i always do & i’m thinkin abt shiro so like ... thats where i am .... remember that time i wrote abt teenage!shiro being so startled at teenage!adam’s sexual humor that he brained himself on the underside of the hoverbike he was fixing bc like ?? the actual PEAK baby gay of it all, my god. 

[thxngam]

@icantthinkofausername613 asked, so here goes part 2 of sam seaborn-centric fics! i was gonna add onto the last one but that would be a rlly long fic, so @d1sasterbi, here’s part two of your ask!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13592--Three wins by sloganeer: sam, during three elections! pretty short but it’s a good read :)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/66650--Five Things That Weren't Comforting by out_there: similar to a fic I put on pt 1 called called Sunshine Days but stil different! 5 AUs of stuff that never happened (personally, the second AU is my favorite) to Sam. it’s some great writing!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/66645--Initial Conditions by out_there: sam during SGTE, SGTJ from josh’s persective! it’s got some fairly explicit sex though in the middle, and i’m not ever sure it’s super sam-centric, but it’s definitely enough to qualify for this list. also, it’s so good! like sam and josh’s relationship, the way it’s written, i just...it’s so good.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/66649--The Right Word by out_there: clearly, this author is good! from’s sam’s pov as he tries to make sense of his relationship with josh and his view of writing and diction, yknow all those writerly things! a really good peak inside his head.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/2755--Everything he almost had by Punk: a kinda sad AU where bartlet isn’t so great and toby gets out and..well a lot. it’s a really good look at an AU version of sam where he’s not quite so sam-like with his ideals and his righteousness and his energy. this is quite good, i really suggest reading it

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13495248--By Your Side by UndeadRobins: so cute and from sam’s pov so here it goes! it’s so good! a 5+1 of josh being a clumsy idiot and sam going with him to the hospital. very good and also sucha contrast from the last rec lol

https://archiveofourown.org/works/8162224--The Future Belongs by ETraytin: a way-in-the-future fic of the next gen of Seaborns to be president. very sweet! it’s just...it’s nostalgic for some reason, and it’s so cute and happy i just...ugh. it’s so fuckin positive lol

https://archiveofourown.org/works/3925696--an american girl raised on promises by rillrill: female! sam. so good - sam has some, uh, questionable beliefs (internalized misogyny who?), but it’s such an interesting look at the character from a different lens. 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/2494772--Change by polyamorousgraysexual: sam and bartlet. sam had such interesting parallels with bartlet when he was there and this is sort of a culmination of all those things in one straight conversation. it’s got a fair bit of humor also it’s (i feel like i keep saying this but it’s sort of the point of this list) a nice examination of sam? like why he does what he does? it’s in 2nd person though, and while i’m not always a fan, that works rlly well for this fic!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/5950648--Learning How to Fly by Avon7: Sam’s thoughts on his inauguration. it’s like...so in character. it’s got all of sam’s twisty, wordy mental stops in one internal monologue on the biggest day of his life in the AU. so good. also what i think sam would think/say in canon if we ever got a seaborn for president scene in canon (idk why we would but if we ever did, this would be what happened)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12791685--Vere Vivere by ninjalanternshark: literally i’ve put this on so many lists. trans sam, and a lovely character study of him becoming who he always was and his career. i just...i really love this fic. sam’s a great character in canon, but AUs like these always my heart happy :)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/2407673--Driving The Future by AndreaLyn: technically sam has literally no lines in this fic. but it’s also literally about sam. so. josh and leo have a conversation about Sam’s “lateral career slide”. I swear it’ll make sense if you read the fic and I like it so here ya go. 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/322850--Heart, Temper, Touch by @snowdarkred: another female!sam fic but also she’s a lesbian and people are bigots. it’s sam and her relationships with the rest of the senior staff and bartlet and how she navigates her career and her sexuality. this is a wonderful fic, it’s like...oddly gratifying. ive put it on more than one list, it’s so good!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/218297--Five Months by candle_beck: sam being hyperfixated on five months of his and josh’s relationship. it’s wonderful and so true to the character. sam hyperfocuses on these things and this is a really great fic that translates that to established-but-not-by-much samjosh

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11769843/1/Seaborn-for-America--Seaborn for America by Every Shade of Blue: so i dislike ff.net bc it’s format makes my eyes hurt and its tagging system is abysmal. all the same, i adore this fic and just about all of this author’s tww fic, which is mostly sam-centric if you’re interested! sam is gonna be president but is oddly surprised that nobody else is surprised.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28180788--Half Light by an orphaned account: this fic is sad and does not have a happy ending but it’s got mallory in it! i’m also pretty sure i’ve answered another ask abt this. sam on his career, the events of 20 hrs in America (that’s what those two fics are called right?), and josh

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25152565--Just a Cough by Nkala99: sam’s got asthma. like an idiot, he doesn’t tell his coworkers. is this an AU? yes. do I care? nope. should you read it anyway? yeah.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21651001--Dark by WaterSoter: sam, after he’s been told the president has MS. so good and kinda heartbreaking? it’s written really well but it’s so sad to me

https://archiveofourown.org/works/326546--turning speechless by @snowdarkred: an extension of the parallels between Sam and Bartlet. tw for child abuse. really really good! 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27159944--Articulation is to Reciprocation by @cauldronoflove: literally THE sam fic. if you read none of the other fics (which, shame on you), read this one. it’s sam’s whole ass thought process with humor and feelings and banter, i just...what can i say? i love this fic, i love this author, read it. read it twice

so this is long af and i considered breaking it into three but that seems excessive, even for me. if yall want me to do rec lists for the major senior staff i can try? i mean that might be fun. idk, lemme know.

anyway, i realy suggest you read all of these (and the fics in part one! the OG ask is here (https://thxngam.tumblr.com/post/650354718322966528/do-you-have-any-favorite-sam-centric-fics-for)). read them all. read them twice. and as always, leave a comment/kudos when you like something! it’s simple, free, and an easy serotonin boost for these authors!

[0ystercatcher]

i think ngl the thing that rly helpd me peak me was seeing a funny subset of trans women being like omg im a butch lesbian and they kinda just looked like yknow. dudes. men. in flannel and band tshirts i guess. and then proceeded to be like im so oppressed for being like this the evil tmes and all of society hurt me every day of my life and break all my bones or whatever like sir you are just some dude...some creep...some moid...

[cattles-bians]

damie vibecca exes au part 8

post directory

obsetress: now i just want fanart of damvibecca at the gym

em: well. pitch it to me comrade ghostfucker

obsetress: idk that's about as far as i got i just reread that bit about vibecca in their matching gym outfits and my brain got stuck

em: hypothetically do u have a colour palette in mind bc i associate gym outfits w like. bright loud colours and

em: idk if it works w our earth sign queens

[em note: emily is a liar and did NOT draw fanart of damvibecca at the gym]

[em note 2: we have the gym art now [x] [x]]

obsetress: i was imagining like charcoals tbh, or jewel tones

obsetress: i could see them in like jewel tone purples or that jewel tone blue green color

obsetress: yeah viola jewel tones or blacks n charcoals

obsetress: becs pastels and camels but jewel tones at the gym

em: it’s about Matching

em: And Destroying Ur Ex (platonically)

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: viola's feeling particularly smug about it but then

obsetress: dani's in an old school tshirt and shorts and jamie's in............ one of dani's old school tshirts and shorts

em: YES

obsetress: not intentionally, she just grabbed whatever was there

obsetress: dani chirps "oh you two look so cute! baby look, they have a matched set"

obsetress: viola arches an eyebrow "and so do you, it seems" and dani laughs "not on purpose, jamie just grabbed whatever was on top in the drawer"

viola: you two... share... a wardrobe?

dani: yeah?

em: god cute

obsetress: cute n dumb

em: they can share nearly everything except pants

em: well. pants as a treat

em: haha pants

em: trousers

obsetress: also rly nice rly clean smooth funny juxtaposition in my brain of vibecca being the ones who intentionally match and damie the ones for whom it just accidentally happens

obsetress: hahahah pants

obsetress: they can share pants but................ should they

em: idk miss chapter 12 danis thighs jamies pyjamas

em: should they

obsetress: PLEASE

obsetress: that's exactly what i was referring to THANKS

obsetress: anyway

obsetress: rebecca just laughs

obsetress: viola huffs and bex is like "sorry, babe, but it is kind of funny"

em: dani jamie wearing like

obsetress: YEAH

obsetress: MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY

em: poor viola

obsetress: thinking about dani's ass in those

em: yeah....

em: violas huffing until jamies exercise flush lasts a little Too Long

obsetress: big blush jamie taylor

em: she’s still like ‘oi dani close ur mouth’ but then she

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: just ogling each other

obsetress: (they briefly pause to ogle vi and rebecca passing a medicine ball back and forth as they do squats and have to acknowledge that, yeah, they've all done alright by themselves)

em: funny montage of the gang doing exercise while surreptitiously taking Peaks

obsetress: omg all i want

obsetress:sometimes having friends as a lesbian means they're all your exes except one, who's your gf, and you're all checking each other out always anyway

em

And That’s Beautiful

obsetress

obsetress: dani: checking out viola's biceps, rebecca's abs

viola: checking out dani's thighs n ass

rebecca: minding her business

jamie: scowling n scrawny

obsetress:(n also checking out dani's thighs n ass, viola's biceps, and begrudgingly peeking at rebecca's abs)

obsetress: every other woman at the gym: checking out jamie, trying to figure out the entire dynamic here

are they a polycule? what

em: jamie probably like

em: maybe she gets really into running bc she just checks out and listens to her audiobooks but like

em: slow twitch vs fast twitch fibers so stays scrawny

obsetress: i can see that

obsetress: just gets on the treadmill and zones tf out

em: jamie ‘why don’t i have biceps’ taylor vs jamie ‘no u gotta lift w ur hips’ taylor

obsetress: she hates it but her psych told her it'll be good for her routine so you know she was like yes ma'am every day ma'am

em: cant believe safe lifting procedures screwed her over

em: ‘yes ma’am every day ma’am’ ur just Going for it arent ya anshdjdh

obsetress: sorry but don't tell me you can't hear it

obsetress: jamie's the person who takes notes in therapy

obsetress: jamie, in the locker room after their workout: do my biceps look bigger?

dani, patiently, already knowing where this is going: bigger than what, baby?

jamie: than yesterday

dani: mm, rome wasn't built in a day, you know

jamie: do they look bigger at all?

dani: well

em: i mean not to perceive her too much but mattresses scene indicates AE/jamie like. at least some muscle in the leg area

em: poor jamie

em: not playing to her strengths

obsetress: yeah she does

obsetress: i mean ae has toned af arms

obsetress: she's just wiry

em: how could i forget the benchpressing dog gif

obsetress: dani's like "jamie, baby, come do squats with me and vi" "m'good" "baby, c'mon, you'll like it" "don't wanna do squats" "it could be good for you" "don't wanna do squats with you two"

em: dani: you gotta like. eat more

jamie: i eat plenty

dani: no u graze all day and then u don’t eat dinner

obsetress: dani: five biscuits spread out across a day doesn't count as eating more

em: dani: protein jamie it’s abt protein

obsetress: dani: you need more protein, which is why i think some lentils would really––

em: jamie thinks protein shakes are Nasty

obsetress: jamie does think protein shakes are nasty but dani will make her a smoothie and sneak it in like she's a child

obsetress: viola and rebecca, with their matching monogrammed blender bottles, just staring

obsetress: becca's like "jamie, just drink it, really, it's fine"

obsetress: viola just does this haughty sniff at her and that's what finally gets jamie to start

em: jamie can deal w being a brat but the idea of viola having Anything over her drives her Insane

em: Drives Her Fuckign Nuts

obsetress: she hates it

obsetress: just the absolute fuckin worst

em: do u think dani ever like

em: like they REALLY need to clear out storage but it’s a boiling frog situation where it’s increased so gradually that

em: like jamie thinks it’s Fine storage is Clear Enough

em: it’s Not

em: danis like. should we invite rebecca and vi over

em: just be Idea of A Snide Viola Comment fills jamie w a burning rage

obsetress: oh my god

obsetress: i'm obsessed with this

obsetress: i would read a whole oneshot about this

em: eventually dani comes clean abt it n jamie thinks it’s v funny bc yknow; open and honest communication is a v important part of their dynamic

em: jamie: next time just tell me my storage looks like shite dani or i will be grumbling abt viola for a Week

obsetress: inevitably

obsetress: when they do have to come over to clean

obsetress: dani offers them takeout and wine ("step up from pizza and beer at least," jamie grumbles) and viola's like "jesus, dani, let's just go out to dinner. my treat"

obsetress: at dinner, viola's like "if you want more storage, i have some wonderful properties––"

obsetress: rebecca's mouthing "sorry" from next to her across the table

em: every time they go out rebecca takes vi aside n is like ok sweetheart so you promise you’re not gonna try convince them to sell the apartment again

em: and violas like (mock horror) of course i won’t. ye of little faith

em: and every time

em: every time she does

em: she’s tryna HELP

obsetress: she would too she'd be like

obsetress: "i'm just trying to HELP"

obsetress: "they're our FRIENDS"

em: i’m on a mission to figure out like

em: this is way way down the line

em: but i wanna believe eventually viola and jamie start to, at the v least, Tolerate each other

em: jamie might even be fond of the crazy bird but she’ll NEVER admit it

obsetress: god like vi's on business or some shit in like

obsetress: the UAE

obsetress: negotiating some Deal

obsetress: and so dani and jamie get dinner with just bex and they're driving home after and having a perfectly mundane conversation and then jamie's just blurting like

obsetress: "i think i miss vi"

em: she’s HORRIFIED

em: she tries to play it off as like um

em: she’s Too Comfortable

em: things are Too Boring

em: which is weird knowing everything we know abt jamie

em: but actually she just... maybe misses viola

em: danis like god i wish i was recording this

obsetress: jamie's passed out next to her at home later (it's ten pm) and dani's chattering happily away on the phone with vi (drinking a martini in her dubai hotel room at one am since, y'know, no bars) in bed right next to her

obsetress: "jamie, uh, said she misses you. i know. no, i KNOW. don't tell her i told you. yeah, yeah, you win, vi, we know. uh-huh. uh-huh. i'm gonna pretend you didn't just ask me that"

em: CUTE

em: u can’t lord it over her vi it’s a little secret

em: vi's like when have i EVER

em: she does

obsetress: once they're good again, dani and vi absolutely just. lose time (there's a metaphor in there) talking to each other still

em: this is wholesome tbh

em: i really like the damie stories where like

em: look it’s nice when damie have each other but it’s also nice when they have their own friends and stuff

em: dunno how to articulate that well

em: it’s a balance! it’s a balance

obsetress: yeah! exactly

obsetress: because that's part of the love n possession thing too yk

obsetress: not to say either of them would ever be like "no friends for you" but

obsetress: wanting to have a life outside of your partner yk

obsetress: they're meeting vi and rebecca for dinner after vi gets back and vi's just grinning and sweeping jamie into a hug "i heard you missed me"

em: she gets jamie a souvenir t-shirt

em: it’s too big

em: OR

em: child’s t-shirt

obsetress: (jamie sleeps in it that night)

obsetress: oh childs might be better

obsetress: she's like "you're a little scrawny, so..."

em: jamie sleeps in it.... soft bitch

em: she feels too much

obsetress: jamie taylor softest bitch

obsetress: dani watches her pull it on and raises an eyebrow and jamie's just like "wot"

em: jamies like (grumbles) i knew she was comin back i’m just

em: shouldn’t you be HAPPY about this development dani

em: ‘s’a gift... s’rude not t’....’

obsetress: YEAH

obsetress: dani just grins "mmhm"

em: it accidentally makes its way into jamies workout clothes pile

obsetress: oh my GOD oh my god

obsetress: viola's shit eating GRIN when jamie shows up at the gym in it

em: jamies like fok

em: mental maths tryna figure if she wants to just. work out in a sports bra

em: she Doesn’t

obsetress: she Doesn't!

obsetress: (she's shy)

em: god it’s one of those shirts that’s like

em: someone who loves me went to UAE and got me this t-shirt or something

obsetress: dani corners her in their empty row in the locker room "you could've just taken it off, you know" "dunno, not everyone needs to... see that, you know?" "i'd certainly like to see it" jamie rolls her eyes but she's grinning "you can see that any time" "well maybe i wanted to see it during my workout" "dani......."

em: jamies embarrassed bc of her gnarly farmers tan means her tummy is at least five shades lighter than the rest of her

em: crisp tan lines

obsetress: god jamie's farmers tan

em: once again i am bringing my tan lines jamie agenda

obsetress: dani loves jamies dumb farmers tan so much

obsetress: she giggles

obsetress: but it's the most loving giggle possible

em: and then when she gets into running...

em: god when i was rowing there were a couple ppl w like what i called a neapolitan icecream tan which is

em: gimme a second

obsetress: jamie gets all huffy when dani giggles at her tan but then dani's like "baby, no, i think it's cute" and jamie gives her a look and dani grins mischievously and ducks her head

obsetress: and then she's licking and kissing and nipping her way along jamie's dumb tan lines

em: there it is

obsetress: it was inevitable

em: so caught up in the joy of jamies dumb farmer tans i forgot abt her gnarly scar she keeps under wraps

em: baby

em: the most baby

obsetress: baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

em: jamie decides the only way to claim the stupid t-shirt as hers is to cut off the sleeves

em: it’s abt the ritual of the thing

obsetress: she shows up at the gym wearing it and

obsetress: that's viola's "oh no she's hot" moment

em: YEAH BABY

obsetress: literally just like

obsetress: world stops

obsetress: viola stares

em: jamie finally gets to do an exercise that shows off her sinewy manual labor grip forearms

em: viola’s probably just as horrified to find jamie hot as every time jamies like oh no

em: violas hot

em: and once again jamie CANNOT know she’s hot bc she will be insufferable

em: she will be the Worst

obsetress: viola's tugging rebecca aside "why didn't you tell me jamie was hot" "what?" viola waves a hand and rebecca just furrows her brow a little and is like "that's just... what she looks like, vi"

obsetress: viola corners dani next "why didn't you tell me jamie was hot" "i did" "oh. right" viola pauses, then "why didn't you make sure i was listening?" dani just gives her a look and walks away

obsetress: dflksdjfldaj god the way jamie and viola are. the same

obsetress: kind of incredibly, in the same ways dani and rebecca are the same

em: “hey baby, did viola seem different today? seemed off”

em: jamies like. is she mad at me. did i break another social taboo.

em: rebecca ‘jamie looks like jamie’ jessel vs dani ‘my gf is so hot i can’t stand it’ clayton

obsetress: "i tell you how hot she is at least three times a week, vi"

em: danis tryna goad her into making the damn shirt a crop top

em: jamies like yeah but isn’t that a step too far. i feel like i am destroying this shirt too much

em: she does it anyway

em: so jamies workout clothes are danis endless grey baggy school t-shirts and this one ugly souvenir shirt that like

em: psychological warfare and she doesn’t even know it

obsetress: i would........ like to see it

obsetress: also crop top jamie is one of my favorite jamies

obsetress: she is severely underrated

em: crop top jamie is

obsetress: and we do not talk about her enough

em: jamie wear More crop tops

obsetress: viola and rebecca in bed, in matching facemasks, after going to the gym post-epiphany that Jamie Is Hot

obsetress: viola: are dani and jamie hotter than us?

rebecca: what?

obsetress: and like

obsetress: viola is NOT insecure

obsetress: she is constantly confident that she's the most attractive woman in the room at any given moment, but

obsetress: she's just so staggered by this realization

em: some neutral third party (ms grose and mr sharma probably) are like well. u guys definitely have a little more of a scary thing going on

em: i’m imagining rebecca and viola at brunch w hannah and owen v seriously discussing this

em: viola brings it up and rebecca GROANS but then she gets invested in the convo

obsetress: GOD yeah

obsetress: she's leaning forward and gesturing with her fork "when you say 'scary'..........."

em: owens like scary is a compliment

em: hannah grose sips her tea knowingly

obsetress: rebecca just narrows her eyes at hannah grose and hannah raises her eyebrows and shrugs

em: after a week or so viola bursts into a room w stupid big sunglasses and a tray of take out coffees and she’s like Don’t You Worry Jamie I Have Concluded You’re Hot But I’m Not Threatened By It

em: jamies like sorry WHAT

em: you’ve been thinking about WHAT

em: viola leaves without ever following it up

obsetress: dani is entirely unfazed

obsetress: doesn't even blink

em: danis like neat she remembered the oat milk

em: everyone in this au is insane

obsetress: any lesbian in 2021 is insane

obsetress: par for the course

em: was gonna protest but

em: Yeah

obsetress: this lesbian meme account i follow on insta is doing “stop asking who’s the top and who’s the bottom. start asking...” posts

obsetress: and one of them is “start asking who’s baby and who’s fuck around and find out” and it just makes me chuckle

obsetress: jamie taylor baby

obsetress: viola lloyd also baby

em: dani is baby passing and jamie is fuck around faking

obsetress: oh my god that’s why that’s why i think we cracked it

obsetress: dani (fuck around) dated jamie (baby) and vi (baby)

obsetress: rebecca (fuck around) dated jamie (baby) and vi (baby)

obsetress: the reason they could never cross further even tho per the transitive property dani (so similar to vi) should be able to date beccs and jamie (so similar to beccs) should be able to date vi is because

obsetress: you can’t have two babies and two fuck arounds in a relationship together

em: oh of course. i see. i see

em: however in the rare rare crack ship of the ‘jamie viola hatefuck’ a similar phenomenon to ‘social anxiety mum friend ordering food’ instinct takes over and someone fucks around and finds out

em: this is just my unhinged jamie viola hatefuck bulkshit which is. it’s ironic ok it’s ironic it’s ironic it’s

em: ok one last thought bc i know it’s super late for u but

obsetress: omg i also have a last thought let’s trade

em: what if mikey is about isabels age n jamie ends up looking after him for one reason or another for a bit

em: and viola absolutely Dotes on him

obsetress: omg

obsetress: that’s what does it. jamie seeing viola w mikey

em: grumble grumble i guess she’s not that bad

em: except then she’s like god what if mikey likes her MORE than me

obsetress: “dani what if mikey gets one of those weird first crushes on vi”

obsetress: dani doesn’t even look up from the laundry “who hasn’t had a crush on vi”

obsetress: jamie’s like “mE” and dani just gives her the most withering look

em: danis like It’s Par For The Course Jamie

em: danis a teacher she’s like it happens don’t sweat it

em: anyway

em: what was. what was ur last little thought

obsetress: i was just thinking more about viola also baby and how also she’s been so privileged her whole life that sometimes there are just some things she can’t do for herself because she just doesn’t know how

obsetress: like she’s never had to learn

em: rebecca gets um

em: freeze dried coffee

em: nescafé

obsetress: but like

obsetress: rebecca genuinely loves taking care of vi for whatever reason (it’s because she loves her) when she really needs it but

obsetress: rebecca also takes no shit and is like “i’m not making the nescafé for you. you’re 36 years old, vi, you need to learn to do it for yourself”

obsetress: and she’ll stand there and watch her do it and then she makes vi do it at least three more times for posterity

obsetress: “i’ll make a plebeian of you yet, viola lloyd”

obsetress: (god only the two of them would think a line like that is funny)

[technicallyblakebelladonna]

oh my god ray i just read that one shot and,,,,,,, i am LOSING my mind

the softness between blake n ilia? the careful, practiced intimacy that is both so new and so familiar to them both letting them fall into step perfectly with each other

strong ilia picking blake up like she weighs nothing,, yes please

also ilia being like “hey i’ve dreamed about this moment for years but just wait a quick sec while i beat the shit out of your abusive ex”

blake not feeling safe in the light OR in the dark but knowing she’ll feel safe with ilia

and then finally, blake knocking on the door of a house that just so happens to belong to two buff lesbians ready to go to battle in the middle of the night

sosososo good omg thank u for that <333

AAAAAAAAAAA AJ YOU ARE SO SO WELCOME T HANK U FOR UR WONDERFUL FEEDBACK N COMMENT THIS IS SO SO SWEET EEEEEEE <3333

can u believe in the original draft i had arkos and then i was like "but why jaune when i could have yang" aND THAT'S HOW ILIA ENDED UP WITH TWO BUFF LESBIAN NEIGHBOURS fksskghkhg if i ever write another fic in that verse, it's just gonna be gay shenanigans ALL OVER THE PLACE

but gODS yeah i just!!!!!! i don't wanna say that i peaked with that catmeleon one-shot bc i DEARLY want to write more for them i really do and i have about a MILLION one-shot ideas but like ............. i very nearly peaked with that one-shot skefhskghrgkhr

if perchance u are craving more catmeleon but with a focus on bees, i can direct u to my bumbleby big bang fic from last year "both versions of her" in which the catmeleon vERY NEARLY GOT AWAY FROM ME fkshskhg it was. almost an oopsie bc it was. yknow, a fic for the bumbleby big bang fkshfgskfhskgh

anyway im just gonna be grinnin like a damned moron over here for the rest of my night, this is just tHE BEST thank you!!! <333 :D T_T

[butchtwelfthdoctor]

tentative alignment chart of my doctor who ship opinions. it should be noted that a significant amount of these i mean compelling in a 'that's interesting' way not in a 'i ship this' way b/c i also think the doctor is ace and/or aro Most Of The Time it makes sense i swear. explained under the cut cos oh boy do i have thoughts

like ten and river was set up quite compellingly but obv we dont really see much more of that (i think its in some audios but i haven't heard those) and then idk eleven was weird abt it sometimes. and thirteen and yaz was only compelling for like...... the last three specials in which i was losing my mind over 'not such a bad date am i' etc but doesnt make a lot of sense cos there was like zero lead up to that lol.

doctordonna qpr is of course peak, tendonna as a ship is not, tenmartha is..... weird........ like i just cant see a way to keep everything canon that happened and make that not weird. elevenamy and amyrory are like..... ok. like sure amy was a little bit in love with the doctor but it was handled in a kinda boring way imo.

tensaxon is on one hand INCREDIBLY HOMOEROTIC but im sorry i just cant with last of the timelords like sorry but he just genocided earth. like i understand the tension but just eueuuegh. but then end of time part two rolls around and yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. twelvemissy is fantastic because she is trying so hard to cast off everything she's done and she Wants the doctor to love her even just a little bit in any way because she has nothing else left and they are the only people who could possibly understand each other. spydoc is interesting because its kinda an extension of the same - spymaster goes and burns down gallifrey after discovering their secrets because OF COURSE it centers on the doctor, just as everything always does, and he just wants her to understand everything and to realise that despite everything they belong together, the last of the timelords. but of course super messed up because of course.

twelveclara i dont think makes sense romantically but they're just so unhinged about each other especially on clara's part..... its like they're not romantically involved because they have to pretend to themselves that they think about each other a normal amount and in normal ways because otherwise they'd have to realise that whatever they've got going on is messed up.

tenrose has its moments. like it really does. the way he looks at her at the end of the christmas invasion. obviously bad wolf bay. but a lot of the time its like...... they really are just friends!!! but also its a codependant lesbian teenage situationship. except for when its platonic. ninerose has a few moments as well but not as much nine is too emotionally repressed. ninejackrose tenjackmartha has SO MUCH GOING ON i didnt even know where to put those on a dynamic scale because they dynamic has So Much Going On yknow but like........... theres something there......... it sure is happening.........

rose and tentoo is....... fine i guess. like roses ending was so tragic as it was but it was such a strong ending? and bringing her back for journeys end was really cool and i liked it but tentoo commits genocide and then tens like yup uhmmm so i'm dumping him here with you. without asking. but he's me and you're in love with me so its fine bye i'll go cry by myself. which was weird. idk. rose and mickey were only interesting as the counterpoint to roses obvious adoration for the doctor vs her normal teenager relationship with mickey.

river song and missy is crack ship lol but i do think it would have been so fabulous is we'd got some screen time of them together.