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organic-guacamole · 4 years ago

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episode 209 spoilers below

I'm so late today but here it is

I love EJ, he's finally learning to be happy. I'm so proud.

Ms Jenn = every boomer during zoom calls, like jeez yes we can hear you stop shouting at me.

LOVE THE SUBTLE JOKE ABOUT QUARANTINE "these dark times" "you mean spring break?"

ah yes, remember when we thought covid was just gonna give us a longer spring break? good times

SEBLOS

damn the passive aggressiveness from Carlos and the absolutely over it tone from seb✋

CASWELL COUSINS!!!!! THEY'RE THE BEST!!!!

we needed more if this kind of goofiness for the first part of season 2 that only such an iconic duo can provide.

old old movies-

is it even that old, or is Nini being a gen alpha rn-

i choose to imagine EJ being scared of the movie and hiding in Ashlyn's shoulder while she keeps a straight face and then EJ pretending to be tough afterwards

aww redlyn are soulmates.... yknow, if gingers had souls

(please ignore me)

y'all saw how EJ's face *lit up* when Gina logged on? how dare you tell me he doesn't like her

ofc she's no damsel in distress, she's Gina porter, she's amazing.

so do we think she'd be the type to just glare at suspicious people? or bark at them

do they not know that Rini broke up? or is Ms Jenn just wanting Nini to suffer through her heartbreak to make her a better actress....

speaking of, why is Nini in the call? she's not in the show anymore. Unless she is, even after the rose and the song got cut, which would be so unfair to all those that auditioned properly before she even came back but whatever, she's the main character I get it 🙄

big red is a hero honestly, Nini better thank him for changing the subject like that

I can't-

i won't work you over the break-

this woman would 100% work her kids 24/7 if it was legal and idk how to feel about it.

YES GINA USE THAT CHARM

QUEEN

FRENCH QUEEN

SHE LEARNT FROM THE BEST (antoine obvi)

smh the airport lady, eavesdropping on Gina's call.

The way she was so happy to answer EJ's call, "eej"

I love them your honour.

EJ WITH PAINTED NAILS YES PLEASE

great now we need to see Gina, Ashlyn and EJ having a complete spa day and EJ getting really into it and Gina and Ashlyn take pictures of him when he's laying down in a robe with a mask and cucumbers on his eyes.

finally we get to see Gina's side of portwell

the way she considered it as flirting, this is the sign she asked for in episode 6 come onnnnn

no is Asher/jack really doing tiktok dances in an airport-

Ricky is me. I am burrito.

oh Lynne, sweetie, I'm sorry but the blonde hair is not it

is that even the same lady or-

THE BEAN

THE CHICAGO BEAN

THE BIG OLD METAL BEAN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CITY 😭

jetlag is my go to excuse for anything... I haven't travelled in 2 years.

"welcome to the Lynne and Mike gossip show. where we talk about our depressed son that we both neglect in certain ways! And now a word from our sponsor, Nord VPN..."

SO MANY CANDLES

WHAT DEMON IS LYNNE TRYING TO SUMMON IN HIS ROOM-

is Nina becoming social media obsessed EJ from season 1? AND SHE LIED ABOUT HAVING SONGS TOO PLEASE WHY ARW THEY RECYCLING THE SAME PLOT-

Gina smiling at the picture of her family on Instagram makes me so happy, idek why.

EJ's nails are so pretty, we needed to see it more (unless he had it on for the rest of the episode and I just.... didn't notice🧍🏽‍♀️)

oh not the tiktok kid✋

yes ma'am end this strange mans whole tiktok career

sir take a hint and leave

GINA NO DONT SAY YOUR LAST NAME HE COULD BE A HUMAN TRAFFICKER

Ricky, walking in style✨

weird kid, ok then Lynne, can't you see he's this close to the edge?

not all your fault baby Ricky, Nini sucks a bit more

RICKY YOU DIDN'T COME DOWN HARD ON THE SONG-

YOU ASKED WHAT IT WAS ABOUT AND SHE SHUT YOU DOWN-

PLEASE DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF

ok but the deleting comment thing was very bad

still don't know if I like Jack honestly

hmmm so Nini's calling herself Nini instead of Nina in her little egg seat, while trying to write a song without inspiration.... Nini, honey, Ricky was your muse, he inspired you to write all those songs, even if it wasn't good for the relationship.

that doesn't mean you gotta get back with him, or that you can't write a song that not about him butttt it'll take some time

the rainbow sticker in her box and her rainbow shirt-

anyways wbk she's not totally straight

Jack are you a criminal?

quick, Gina, check his ankle for a tracker

THE YES AND PRACTICE STRIKES AGAIN

the way Gina wasn't into it in episode 6 but she's used the technique twice now

stole her grandma's Pomeranian-

Jack where the hell did you pull that out from-

the fake crying killed me, that looks like so much fun though

anyone wanna raid a first class lounge with me?

wait so is jack not gonna go in with her?

wouldn't he go in too? help look for the credit card? SO CONFUSED

the first class lounge guy was so into the drama though, watch his face when they start arguing 😭

sorry to break this to you Kourtney, but you haven't even blocked the second act yet soooo...

take that as you will

I love how all of them are totally dissing the dance off

that's the most realistic part of this show tbh

shouldn't Nini have asked how she knew....since the start? why is the fact that her best friend has knowledge of a North high secret now dawning on her...

Howie is sweet honestly, at least he's trying to help. but I stand with Kourtney, don't take him back just because he sang an amazing song, and is giving you a heads up on what's gonna happen...

KOURTNEY IS ME TRYING TO LEAVE AN ONLINE CLASS

I hate school

ooo Nini's writing a song about bad internet connection 🤩🤩🤩

I never lie, except when I do-

son that is the creepiest thing you could say to a stranger that you've been "helping"

2 truths and a lie👀

he's an Ariana fan 100%

called it.

OLDER BROTHER-

WHAT-

free spirit? damn so brother porter was in that horse movie

so has she been kissed or not?????????

I feel like she's moved more than 15 times though so possibly

but then if she's moved so much, and before east high she never opened up to anyone, she's never been kissed then?? damn

same though Gina so let's be besties please

heartbreak president is a great song title idea, give Nini a call rn

but wait

is the no strings attached feeling thing about her telling Ricky she liked him? she thought she was moving away so she thought it'd be no strings attached???

guys I think I figured it out insert the "I've connected two dots" meme

THE DUKE SWEATSHIRT

IS THAT YOUR BOYFRIEND'S

OMG I LOVE I LOVE

NOT THAT I KNOW OF???

ma'am did you just kill me

yes you did

Lynne and Ricky have such a weird relationship

YES IT DID SUCK

TODD SUCKS

LYNNE SUCKS

yeah I get that you wanted Ricky to like Todd BUT THAT WASN'T THE TIME

right so we already know that Ricky was so desperate to keep Nini cuz he didn't want to be like his parents, and now Lynne's talking about this-

Richard needs a long hug

yes Lynne, it is your fault. thank you for finally admitting it.

YES DYE YOUR HAIR

BLOND HIGHLIGHTS RICKY WILL RISE AGAIN

"sometimes the best, last thing you can do for someone you love, is let them go."

gotta admit I teared up at that point

not me thinking big red was calling ms Jenn cupcake for a hot second-

Carlos please omg, you're at the "beach" and they're leaving for the pool?

also, why not just do the call from the hotel room please omg

"don't ask me"

"Carlos"

OMG WHAT HAPPENED

big red wants the tea

O M G

SEB IS JEALOUS

JEALOUS SEBBY IS MY FAVOURITE THING IDC

I'm surprised ms Jenn knew how to give Nini permission to screenshare tbh

So lily's been stalking the East high kids and spending time editing this video while she's supposedly in an immersion trip.... right

EJ and Ashlyn's picture is so chaotic, what even is happening there

"slacking off" bestie its spring break, obviously they're confident enough that they'll get it done in time so why not focus on your own musical.

jealous seb = sassy seb

please what if those guys Carlos is posing with are his cousins or something and that's why he's so confused about Seb

6 YEAR OLD EJ I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM

Nini saying she's obsessed with her ex, that's not weird at all 👍

I can just tell Matt had a blast harassing Julia with those puppets.

Jack please dont be like that, "yet"

chances are you'll never see eachother again 🥰

(honestly sometimes I really miss those friends I made on trips and stuff when we'd spend the day or week together, only to never see them again....those were the good days though)

Ashlyn and Nini should write more songs..... something better than this one at least

Nini: "im good"

cue the Tia Mowry (please I can't spell) crying gif

oh I forgot Ricky was in the show for a hot second

1. where did Gina get to film this without people being around

2. did she just... randomly change her clothes???

ok but the transition between Carlos and EJ

*chefs kiss*

now everyone shut up, EJ's singing

oh i think I'm pregnant

HIS MUSCLES

YES KOURTNEY

I love how big red and Kourtney went from being "the best friends™" to the couple in season 1, to kinda close themselves and having their own plots

sebby makes me so happy

props to biggies editing skills honestly

PORTWELL BEING SIDE TO SIDE I CANT

AND SEBLOS OMG

big red lives for the drama

"wow" so true Ricky

no he is not cute, stop it

"holding" ok that's kinda cute

yeah EJ's a lucky guy😌

jokes aside, it's not that hard to exchange numbers-

keep in touch if you want

ok I really like Jack now

if he comes back in season 3, maybe have him be LGBTQ+ ?

like the only out characters they have rn are Seb and Carlos and they're like the sterotypes, yk?

I'd love to see jack kinda break the mold

Ricky's breaking my heart

that song just hurts

the only thing

now I don't hate Lynne????????

HOW DARE THEY WRITE IN A PROPER REDEMPTION ARC FOR HER

UGH IM SUPPOSED TO HATE HER FOREVER

I mean I don't live her now but she's good

but honestly

"mom can I show you something"

IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL

THE PICTURE AND EVERYTHING OMG

I'm sobbing please help

Gina saying she's just waiting for the right guy and then EJ coming to the airport to pick her up late at night without her asking, offering to bring her back in the morning so she won't have to Uber, bringing her a granola bar (WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE FORGOT TO PACK) and without expecting anything in return???

ms ma'am you've got a keeper right there

her smile at the end was so heartwarming I really can't.

this episode was great.

it felt really short but I liked it, great character development for Ricky, Lynne and Gina.

Cant wait for next episode to see more of EJ being the ideal boyfriend /hj

#hsmtmts #hsmtmts s2 #hsmtmts season 2 #hsmtmts spoilers #ej caswell #ricky bowen #gina porter #seblos #nini salazar roberts #jack hsmtmts #carlos rodriguez #seb mathew smith #kourtney greene #big red #ashlyn caswell #caswell cousins #portwell will be the death of me #guac's episode text blocks :)

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gellavonhamster · 4 years ago

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Jack, Quincey, Arthur for character ask meme! (aka Trio with some braincells that mostly just vibing)

Jack:

First impression: Honestly, I don’t remember what I thought of him when I read the book for the first time. I think I liked him, though less than I do now, but I cannot recall what was my very first impression when reading his chapters

Impression now: I love this very flawed but trying-his-best depressed romantic bastard with all my heart

Favorite moment: proposing to Lucy and almost sitting down on his hat and fidgeting with a lancet and overall being the opposite of the “calm”, “resolute”, “imperturbable” picture of him Lucy has literally just painted to Mina, because it’s hilarious and endearing

Idea for a story: *bangs fist on table* I want a prequel about the adventures of Jack, Quincey, and Arthur around the globe, and I want it NOW

Unpopular opinion: I think he handled being rejected by Lucy really well for someone who seems to be in a bad place mentally regardless. All his complaints are confined to his diary, it’s not like he’s going around whining about his broken heart.

Favorite relationship: My favourite relationship for all three suitors is the three of them together, but I am going to try to say something different in reply to this question for all three of them. So, apart from the Trio with Some Braincells™ (you’re honestly being very generous with “some”, haha), I’m going to single out Jack and Quincey, because I’m going through a very bad case of “character you project on x your type” with them. And I feel slightly bad about it, because it’s pair the spares in a sense, but listen, if I’m not supposed to ship this then why on top of that sweet sweet friends-to-lovers opposites-attract shit everything Jack says about Quincey sounds like the verbal equivalent of the Twink Boutta Pounce meme

Favorite headcanon: All men in his family used to be doctors, so he kind of knew from his very childhood who he wants to be when he grows up. His position as the head of the asylum is probably inherited in some sense, that’s part of the reason why he got it so young (though not the only reason).

Quincey:

First impression: omg they have an American with a Gun, this is going to be fun

Impression now: I’d die for him but he wouldn’t let me

Favorite moment: his letter to Arthur! After reading about two men being rejected and one being favoured by the same lady, a reader would expect to see the three men in question as rivals, probably even hating each other, but then we get Quincey’s very fond, very warm letter, and it subverts all these expectations because SURPRISE, they’re actually friends who go way back and had adventures together and LOVE each other! I wish we got more of his POV in the book.

Idea for a story: I just think this world needs more stories in which he survives

Unpopular opinion: he’s not stupid. I mean, every man in the Crew of Light is a little stupid (affectionate), but you know what, he realized that something or someone must be drinking Lucy’s blood way earlier than Jack, who’s supposed to be the smart one, and he was their strategist when they went to purify Dracula’s coffins. This man is not just muscle

Favorite relationship: apart from what I’ve already mentioned in Jack’s part of this ask, I really love his friendship with Mina. I think they’re alike in how they try to ease the burdens of the ones they love while suffering themselves and not letting anyone else see this suffering, hence this instant understanding, which manifests in how she meets him for the first time and immediately sees that despite all his toughness, he needs a hug and a kind word, and in how he’s the first to understand what she means when she asks the men to kill her if she turns into a vampire.

Favorite headcanon: he’s the only member of the Crew of Light whose parents are alive throughout the events of the book (if we want to be particularly cruel and canon-compliant, the only one whose parents outlive him). He also has a bunch of siblings, both older and younger, including some older brothers, which gives him an opportunity to keep wandering around the world with those Englishmen because there are other people to take care of whatever it is that makes their family rich (I imagine they definitely have a lot of cattle farms; I also like the idea I saw in one fic that they profit off the oil discovered on their lands).

Arthur:

First impression: Look, Lucy, to each their own, but... of all three, why him?

Impression now: I have loosely expanded in my head whatever personality Stoker deigned to give him, and now I love him

Favorite moment: his army of dogs, dogs ex machina as I call them

Idea for a story: I’ve made a post about it some time ago but. Will someone write a short cute fic about him giving Lucy a puppy, that would be adorable

Unpopular opinion: I get where people who hate on him for being bland are coming from, but at least he’s nice and brave and did nothing wrong. Also, his best friends are like “adventures fuck yea, let’s shoot at whatever problem we have at hand!” and “what if I conducted this experiment that violates medical ethics”, and I just think that at least someone in this boy band has to be a normie, for the sake of balance

Favorite relationship: again, apart from the three suitors, I really like the father-son relationship he has with Van Helsing

Favorite headcanon: he’s good at socializing and conversing with people and similar things that come with belonging to high society, but it always ends up at a certain point with him being drained of energy, and then he just disappears to spend time alone at his estate, with his dogs and horses and the forest. In general, he loves nature and being in the woods. Unfortunately, that includes passion for hunting.

#okay had to do this one too; the rest of them tomorrow #asks #anonymous #gella talks dracula #jack seward #quincey morris #arthur holmwood #dracula #bram stoker #the suitors

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shhhhhskars · 5 years ago

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Dating Phase Goodness.

Soft Alex. Dating Phase. Snoh Allegra. The City. Words: 2,041. Dating phase goodness.......I have so many feels for it. As always, I hope you enjoy♡ (The ask: Do u listen to snoh aalegra? I keep imagining them in the dating phase but they’ve gone to her gig with their own friends and meet up unexpectedly and end up having a romantic night of just swaying to her music at the low lit club and exchanging soft words 😭 thank you for sending this in and ruining me)

There’s something so wonderfully enigmatic about summer-time in New York City. The tarmac is glistening from the heat, the day-time sun is hot, enough to keep the entire city pulsating and breathing through the night. There’s something in the air- this thrilling, wild energy, this feeling that anything can happen. Friends gather unexpectedly, running into each other in the streets, small taverns revive their outdoor terraces for the season. The parks and beaches stay open later, and they’re usually bustling throughout the evenings. People are happier than usual, neighbors greet each other for the first time in months.

The August days are long, but the sun had finally set, and she stripped down, eager to get out of the damp clothing. A cool shower can change anyone’s mood, revive the most exhausted. She stepped out refreshed, smelling like rose water and sandalwood, a nice change from the stale deodorant and sweat that clung to her before. She slipped into her tiny, short black dress that cinched snuggly at her waist, and hugged graciously on her curves. The familiar chime rang out as she dusted a earthy blush on the apples of her cheeks, signaling a stream of texts from the heinous group chat that she’d been tempted to put on mute for the last hour.

Snoh Allegra found her way to the city and is playing at The Highline Ballroom tonight, the turn out is delicious. The entire place just feels sexier, from her aura alone. Voice so strong, but soothing, like tea sweetened with milk but just enough honey, to make it yummy to drink. Drinks are flowing, weed smoke floats through the air, and everyone is laughing. Everyone in her friend group is...oddly, getting along, for once, and there’s not much that could make this moment better. Except......maybe Alexander being here?

Oh fuck- who the hell was she turning into? This is why she was hesitant to begin this…thing, in the first place. Alexander was hard to keep out of the brain as of late. Ever since their chance meeting in the East Village, he kept her phone warm, unashamed to make his presence known. She was grateful that he wasn’t the slightest bit clingy, but could instantly sense that he valued consistency, and taking up space. He frequently checked in on her, sending dumb little shit to her phone throughout the day, memes or whatever the fuck he saw that amused him, or just straight up goofy shit he saw around the city. The whole damn thing was all still exceptionally new, this idea of seeing each other. Most of the time it was just enjoying each other’s company, nothing too crazy, and was lovely this way. Experimental and new.

A familiar arm circled around her waist, pulling on her frame. She could tell by the smell alone who it was. A manicured hand lifted against the rigid chest. “Jim, you’re about one drink away from me cutting you off, again.” It was a joke, mostly. Naturally there would be that one friend who had one too many, too friggin’ early, and tonight it was Jimi’s turn. Completely harmless, but utterly annoying, and touchy-feely when he drank, he ignored her comment, staggering lightly. “Let me buy you another drink, fam. We’re came here to see Snoh, and your ass is sober?” And of course, the other motherfuckers that surrounded had to affirm his slurred words, urging her, ‘get another one; it’s on his dime.’ She huffed at the dramatics of her friends, she was certainly not sober, but she snatched his credit card out of his hand anyway and he winked at her. This earned brief eye-roll and she was off, away from her toxic little group of friends.

The bar on the opposite side of the room glowed like a beacon of hope as she made her way there, shuffling through pockets of people focused on the opening acts. She ignored a few stares to push her way to the counter, determined to get her drink before Snoh came on. She snickered when they asked if she wanted to open a tab, and obliged- Jimi’s karma for earlier. She waited for her drink, elbows propped on the counter, and she stared around the club, which to no surprise was getting packed out as the lady of the hour was about to come on soon.

It was the feeling of a warm hand gripping on her upper shoulder, close to the nape of her neck, that made her jump, and she turned, face already fixed and ready to give whoever the fuck it was touching her a good dose of her mind. Expecting to see one of her boys- she felt her heart lurch down into her pit of her tummy, realizing who the firm grip belonged to.

Alexander grinned at her, his blue eyes dancing with amusement. He looked good, as per usual, sporting a white linen shirt, and crisp dark denim. He leaned himself nimbly on the bar, his body flush next to hers, pressing comfortably. He smelt like whiskey, and tobacco and she inhaled his familiar scent unintentionally, which only gave her more butterflies in the very low part of her stomach. Even leaning, he still loomed over her, nearly casting a shadow, from being so giant. “What are the odds?” he asked with a simple, mischievous smile. She got a hint of the freshness that masked his breath, like he was sucking on a mint just before approaching her.

Muscles stiffened, moisture seeping through her pores, she could gag at her luck right now. She wanted to clutch her pearls and scream, but the liquor running through her calmed her nerves, a bit. The bartender slid the jack and coke her way, right on time, and Alexander’s face was turned away from the counter, focused in on completely her. She nodded a thanks for the beverage, buying herself a few seconds, before turning her head towards the Swede, pressing back comfortably against his side. They were shoulder to shoulder, or, body to body, in a sense, because she was too short to be perfectly aligned with his shoulders. “Are you following me, now, Skarsgard?” she said trying to mask the happiness she felt creeping all over her face, eyes slightly glazed over as she gazed back at him. He laughed, his cheeks covered in blush from smiling so hard. “Nahh,” he said in a casual tone, then he added a goofy little, “..Maybe,” tilting his head with a little shrug, jokingly. The close proximity of his face next to hers made the club feel so much smaller, and it was already quite intimate on it’s own.

For a brief moment she wondered if this was even real, or if someone had dropped something in her drink earlier, because it was so wildly random. “Are you really here, right now?” she questioned, narrowing her eyes and bringing the tip of her finger to to the bridge of his nose. She lightly glided her small finger down, wiping away the moisture that had accumulated, a smile creeping over her lips that traveled all the way up to her eyes, the same thing mirroring in his his. He chuckled, but went quiet at her touch, the blush in his cheeks burning brighter now. “I didn’t know you were into Snoh.” she said, her chest tight and heaving lightly. There was a hell of a lot more things that she didn’t know about the man, so it was a comical thing to say, but he just nodded, that small smile still playing on his lips. “She’s good,” he admitted earnestly, “And I’m here with people. My best friend Dada, he’s here. And a few others.” He paused briefly, his eyes traveling down her face, falling on her lips before going back up to her eyes. She took a long sip from her straw, her nerves shot under his gaze, heat crawling all over her skin from it. “Are...you here...with people..?” he started, wetting his lips. His voice was gentle, anxious, a little softer. She touched his arm instantly, a slightly alarmed look taking over he face as she nodded, a little too eager to reassure him that she was not here on a date of any kind, His eyes instantly softened, eyebrows that were knitted together, finally relaxing. Truth was...lately, that was reserved for him.

Gaze casted down and fingers intertwined so they wouldn’t lose each other, he led her back to his section at the very top level of the club. He was stealing her away from her friends, but she felt eager to be whisked away. She always had butterflies around him, but this scene was different, the dimly lit, crowded club, the music that was swallowing up the room, the buzz of it all. Alexander introduced her to everyone, and he was unable to hide his delight as he did so. Dada wrapped her into a huge, bear hug, and she fluffed his golden locks. “Heard a few things about you from this one,” he said with a goofy little wink, beckoning towards Alex. Before she could question him any further, Alexander was pulling her away and wrapping her up in his arms, groaning at his friend. “Snoh’s on.” he muttered in her ear, and she shivered from his breath on her neck. The lights turned a delicious hazy, rosy color, dimmed a few notches, and the goddess herself was on the stage, belting out the most gorgeous melodies. She sounded even more magical live, which was so satisfying. Ugh. Those feels again, right, Snoh?

‘It's not that I don't want you here. It's somethin' 'bout the way you stare into my eyes.’

Snoh pulled everyone in, but she felt captivated by her steady, smooth voice, and her statuesque frame, and of course- her beauty. She was in a bit of a trace from her, sort of stuck, and jumped a little when Alexander wrapped his arms around her small waist. His large frame came flush with her body from behind, rigid chest pressed sturdily against her back, and she instantly settled into the cozy embrace. She felt her tension fading, from being against him, but nerves still beamed in the depths of her tummy. She just fit in his arms, and he cradled her waist with precision and care, she could swear she felt a territorial vibe from the way he held onto her, shielding her from the rest of the group. He tucked his head near her ear, coming real close. “You good?” His voice was a low murmur in her ear, and she felt her intimacy twitch, but she just nodded, affirming that his touch was absolutely perfect.

She would genuinely be upset if he let go, and she raised her drink to his lips, and he took a small sip from behind her. They swayed gently to the soft songs, finding their rhythm, adjusting every now and again, and it didn’t take long for her nerves to melt away entirely. It was natural and seamless being with him, and the moment was to be enjoyed without restraint. “She’s perfect,” she murmured to him, convinced the woman on the stage was some form of angel. Alexander chuckled lightly and nodded, but it was brief. “This is perfect.” he challenged into her ear, nuzzling into her hair. “Being here with you. This is going to be hard to beat.” She had to pause, to mull over the fact that she was completely fucked, charmed under whatever...Swedish magic he sprinkled on her. And, he told no lies, the moment would be hard to beat, the soft light, the ambiance, the way Snoh was serenading them with her sweet, melodies. She turned her head towards his face, leaving a soft, lingering open mouthed kiss on his lips, squeezing tightly on his hands wrapped around her waist. He breathed her in, hungry for her, tightening that grip on her waist. She had to stop herself from squeezing her legs shut completely when she felt his soft tongue touch hers, and she felt herself getting flustered, blushing all over. This was bliss- pure, serendipitous, bliss.

‘Come through, I think I need you here.’

#alexander skarsgard imagine #alexander tings #alexander skarsgard x reader #alexander skarsgard fan fic #alexander skarsgard drabbles #askarsgard imagine #askarsgard drabble #askarsgard x reader #skarsgard fan fic

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splendidshinobi · 4 years ago

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FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST 2003 LIVE REACT: EPISODES 26-30

been awhile since i’ve watched but.... another day, another emotional rollercoaster

episode 26: her reason

who’s her and what’s her reason

bother him ALLLLL you want maria ross...bother him all day long

he deserves it

INVOICE HAHAHAHAHA

dont yell at maria fuck off!!!!

GIRLY WHAT IS IZUMI DOING!!!!!!!!

i screamed i did

i love sig and izumi sm!!!!!!

omg ed and al’s faces

PANINYAAAAAAA

why does she have an automail arm whAT

i feel almost insulted for paninya’s dope weapon legs

oh wait ive seen this arm wrestling scene before lmao

go paninya goooo

i do not tolerate this mr dominic slander

OH NO DO NOT INSULT QUEEN WINRY’S WORK

sucks to suck!!!!

i do think winry may have just fallen in love

ed is such a simp though

JUMBO????? his name iS JUMBO??????

al’s mousy little what?

yikes yeah you know what winry id be pissed too

she felt so good about her work!!!

crush over

jk theyre soulmates

wow roy ur so smart

damn oh ok they kept paninya’s legs too

so she only has 1 biological limb wow

paninya is definitely a lesbian

we’ve all known that though i mean-----the camo pants

i saw paninya wearing army pants and flip flops, so i bought army pants and flip flops

oh my god winry you DEVIOUS BASTARD

i can see why people ship paninya and winry but im sorry im an edwin simp

young pinako is hot i get it dominic

OH MY GOD DEVIOUS

WINRY LMAO

GUN LEGS!

kill him?? pANINYA think about that before you shoot someone!!!

AWWWWWW ED!!!! “best automail in the world!!!!” IM CRYING

“hello sir” alphonse you sweet boy

sheska u good???

OPE HEY CURTISES

ed why are you sad

omg winry dont cry!!!!

hahahaha sig

THE BOYS’ FACES LMAO

episode 27: teacher

izumi time lets gooooooooooooo

the ominous music lolololol

THE WINDOW

WHERE IS ALPHONSE

RIGHT THERE

ED’S FUCKING FACE HAHAHAHA

grumman!!!!!

STEW TONIGHT FUCK YEAH

xerxes drop

edward you are being so foreboding

izumi queen of my life lets go girl!!!

umbrella king sig curtis!!!

ed you dumbass!!!!!

angry face boys

mom dad and the kids on the train!!!! makes me cry

awww win’s gonna miss the dudes

omg havoc plzzzz

why is he calling riza like she doesnt already know shes going too

do not leave my boy falman behind!!!

oh good ok

mason my dude!!!

“yes maam”

this is UNCOMFORTABLE

guys i simp for sig tbh

omg al scary boy

uh oh she SAWWWWWWW you!!!

aww i forgot about the dead cat goddamnit

not THE KITTY

ok but those baby kittens need some MELK

its all over for you two watch out

cant hide JACK SHIT from mama bear

yikes

she gonna kick your ass oof

hugs oh thats nice

episode 28: all is one, one is all

island timeeee

wait theyre on island time PART 2???? ok

the way sig’s HAND---- anyway

ok so creepy naked child??

im suspicious

clearly the boys didnt read my hero academia

or the three musketeers

al really got YEETED

yote?

oh the kid has clothes on. leaf clothes

i know dublith is in the “south” but is it really a tropical locale?

aww the bunny

“kill it”

owie hope you dont get rabies edward

the ost man so good for both series

al really said J’ACCUSE

they didnt know the masked man was mason the first time around? aight

im really having trouble typing and eating dumplings at the same time

might pause for a dumpling break

i made these in the microwave theyre pretty good

def not the best ive had but they were, ya know, microwaved

anyways sad al hours

YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS YOUR BROTHER????

it’s the circle of life simba

getting REAL philosophical rn

“dont call me small”

now we’re getting REAL scientific

im just imagining these idiots on shrooms rn

mannnnnnnnnnnn

WAIT IMAGINE LING YAO ON SHROOMS

wow what a yummy snake breakfast

izumi said 👁 👄 👁

izumi is so hot

that is the creepiest motherfucker i ever did see

ok im gonna go rinse this dish out be back in a min!!!

episode 29: the untainted child

i am the tainted adult

you SURE his parents are lookin?

i feel like izumi is being very loving towards this child

what happened to tough love bbygirl

im not saying shes not loving in her ways but shouldnt she by nature be a litttttleeee bit more sus of this kid???

dont tell me

this is sig and izumi’s “child”

theory pending

winry is such a protective lil egg

here’s whats cookin in my head

its sig and izumi’s child and ed’s arm and leg smooshed together into a homunculus...theory still pending but im definitely right

WHY DOES SIG SLEEP W HIS EYES OPEN SIR!!!!!!!

whole situation is a mess my dudes

what did u do kid?????

“i know ed lies sometimes”

l oh fucking l

who transmutes themselves with a bed though

not the move kid

OPE

of course winry slept through this whole thing

sheska and elicia and gracia. my heart.

did the colonel just LEAVE HER BEHIND? god what a dick

sheska WENT OFFFFFFFF!!!!!!

yes maam!!!!!!!

u tell that dumbass!!!!!!

why does envy have to sit like that

gon make me SIMP

embarrassing

*debby ryan hair tuck meme*

i love the way al sits

hes so dainty

what a gent

oh that lil kid was in the gate!!!!

how a homunculus is born? please tell me more

ARCHER....my sister was texting me about him when she asked how far i was. i googled him i saw his....bod....

yup

ARM AND LEG CONFIRMED

my brain waves are unparalleled

ED REALLY JUST YEETED WINRY AND KABEDONED THE HOMUNCULUS

EDWARD STOPPPPPPPPPPPPP OMG

off goes the kid

BIDOOOOOOOOOOO <3

why is she upset??? what did you realize izumi

that its your baby??? probs

im just that smart

episode 30: assault on south headquarters

YOKI LMAO

seeing yoki and scar makes me miss mei chang

MEI CHANG SUPREMACY

yoki really about to snitch

BIDOOOOOO

everyone showing up this episode

greed is gonna roll up with a venti frappuccino any minute now

archer is a creep

is this footage from the arnold classic?

“the muscles did the talking for them”

archer is a creep

who ru calling a freak HAHA AL’s angwy voice

ope

how IS hughes doing

pls not the pain

how did this kid come into the corporeal world

armstrong what

OUROBOROS

so he’s either wrath or pride ig

i dont think bradley is a homunculus in this one

yoki is basically michael yagoobian aka the bowler hat guy

there’s greed lmao

with the ladies

EW NO PLEASE GOD

I DONT WANT ANY MORE SHOU TUCKER

KIMBLEE WHAT

WHAT THE FUCK WHO CUT HIS HAIR LIKE THAT

WHO ALLOWED THAT I AM CHOKING

NOT THE MULLET PONYTAIL

izumi taking on the military

of course

kimblee JESUS

bradley is EVERYWHERE at ALL TIMES

this is rOUGH

there are so many parties vying for the kid

i still cant get over kimblee like WHAT

WHAT IS HIS PURPOSE HERE

AGAIN it just seems like bradley is everywhere at all times

#carol watches fma03 #fullmetal alchemist #carol's remaining brain cells #hi!!!!!#back w reactz #yay

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coquelicoq · 6 years ago

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xing tian meng meme culture

okay i can’t stop thinking about all the unnamed members of the gang having their own language of inside jokes/memes

(this was inspired by @sarah-yyy‘s fic in which zz eventually finds the “can i eat you?” line hilarious...i like to imagine that at some point he innocently mentions it in front of other gang members and they all latch on gleefully)

anyone: “i’m hungry.” everyone else: “oh, do you want a bite?” *waggles eyebrows*

related: “i could really go for some noodles right now if you know what i mean” and assorted other food-based innuendo. most of it goes over zz’s head but it’s still fun for everyone else (except jack)

jack’s knives are only referred to as other types of weapons. “where’s jack?” “oh he’s out by the pool sharpening his truncheons.” jack hates it because he does have other weapons besides knives and he can never tell when people are actually talking about those

“sir those are jack’s emotional support fingerless gloves”

anytime someone mentions a friend from outside the gang: “okay but how friendly are you, fraction-wise?” but no one has agreed on whether smaller fractions are closer to platonic or closer to romantic so the answer is meaningless

“and they were half-friends” “oh my god they were half-friends”

“zhao zi’s here, everybody hide your pectorals”

in the weight room there’s a bulletin board with a sign that says “DO IT FOR HIM” and a bunch of pictures of zhao zi

fake freudian slips to razz zhao zi about his muscle obsession: “i’m gonna go to the market, does anybody want some glute - i mean fruit?”

there is not a single straight in the entire gang. some joker put up a sign in the gang clubhouse (i assume they don’t all just bro out at tang yi’s house, so they must have some cozy hangout spot where they can let their hair down and shoot pool or whatever) that says “you don’t have to be gay to work here, but it helps!” at every possible opportunity in conversation with a straight person, they’ll work in something backhanded like “truly admirable how well you’re doing in life considering you’ve had no help whatsoever” to that person’s great bafflement

“what up heteros” becomes the standard ironic greeting for a group of other xing tian meng members

one of them saw the “drugs” owl vine and now they all refer to members of other gangs as hooters, which the other gangs assume is something really offensive

they come up with ridiculous code names for nonexistent assignments and sprinkle them into conversation if they think other gangs are eavesdropping so that if the other gangs ever need to discuss them internally they’ll have to say absurd things like “i overheard those xing tian meng thugs saying operation: funky chicken is going down at the docks tomorrow night. everybody get ready”

they all get matching temporary tattoos and try to convince shaofei that it’s their new gang symbol

there’s a rumor going around that before his xing tian meng days, jack was an expert poisoner for hire. now the gang members have started using “take a fucking sip” to mean, variously, “die” (”i want you to take care of that troublemaker.” “say no more, boss. i’ll make sure he takes a fucking sip.”), “take a bullet” (”remember that time shaofei took a fucking sip for hong ye?”), and “give a rat’s ass” (”i don’t have any more fucking sips to take”)

andy told them about the kermit sweater and now they talk about shaofei exclusively using muppet references (while being very careful to never imply that tang yi is miss piggy)

“it’s not the size of the underwear that matters, it’s the number of pigs”

for some reason even though everybody except jack wears suits pretty much all the time, they all refer to suit pants as “power bottoms” (”oh, are those power bottoms new? lookin good bro”). this has been known to cause problems at the suit shop they own when they slip up in front of customers

“i’d stalk you for 4 years demanding to know what you’re hiding bro” “aw thanks bro” “i’d follow you to the ends of the earth bro” “let’s get handcuffed together and go on a romantic hike bro”

de-ge gets very melodramatic whenever he’s injured and brings it up at every possible opportunity, especially by showing off his scars as a way to prove how badass and devoted to tang yi he is. the other gang members have started making up increasingly absurd stories behind all their scars to one-up him. “yeah i got this one punching a rabid squirrel that was flying right toward boss’s face. knocked him right out, but his damn claws slashed my hand open. also i might have rabies now but i’m sure we’ll find out in a couple days”

since the two most successful romantic relationships in the gang are with slightly dumb, very earnest police officers, the remaining bachelors like to scheme about how to catch themselves a cop boyfriend. “which crime do you think i should commit that will get me arrested and taken in to the station but also not be a turnoff?” sometimes they refer to the police station as a singles bar. sometimes they use their one call to tell their lawyer “don’t come in yet, i think the guy interrogating me is about to give me his number.” they have a whole ranking system for crimes based on how easy they think it would be for a potential law enforcement boyfriend to get over, and when a crime needs to be committed they’ll decide which one of them should actually do it based on the ranking of the crime and whose current dry spell is the shortest. unfortunately they also have a very skewed sense of which crimes are worse than others, so sometimes they ask shaofei or zz to weigh in: “hypothetically speaking, which is worse, shoplifting or arson? asking for a friend.”

i like to imagine that jack doesn’t get memes at all, and that’s a big reason that everybody’s so into them, because jack is so cool and in control at all times and the look of confused suspicion he gets when he can’t tell if something is a ridiculous reference or not is the best part of everyone’s day.

de-ge, being the humorless square he is, assumes they’re all at his expense.

dao yi would never partake himself, but he understands every reference and at times can be seen trying to hide a tiny smile.

hong ye, queen of memes, is the originator of half of these, and she has come up with a bunch more poking fun at tang yi specifically that everyone thinks are hilarious but could never get away with using themselves.

tang yi does not participate and for the most part the gang members avoid making references in his presence, but he has dao yi prepare a dossier on each meme and inside joke because he feels it’s important to keep current on what his underlings are getting up to these days.

shaofei and zhao zi are completely and utterly clueless that any of this is happening.

#history3 #history 3: 圈套 #history 3: trapped #someone stop me lol #also feel free to add on! i think only one unnamed gang member has even spoken on the show so we have a lot of leeway to make shit up!#and they were half friends #sir those are jack's emotional support fingerless gloves #kermit!shaofei #trapped memes #memes #fictional memes #my trapped posts #my posts

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wardencommanderrodimiss · 5 years ago

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halloween special 2019

(Or, Halloween Special 2027, because this is set immediately after Turnabout Academy but contains no reference to it besides the fact that Juniper exists.)

A Fae AU side story. A classic meme of the autumnal season gets a cannibal joke twist, and the real horror story is the friends we made along the way. Written with the profoundest apologies to the professor from whom I took an entire semester course on Edgar Allan Poe.

----

It still feels like the crack of dawn, after the week they’ve had, but dawn is admittedly later in late October, and the sun is already risen, so it’s not early at all. It’s no one’s problem but Phoenix’s own that his brain is still zombified. Trucy woke him up, flinging her things all around the apartment to get ready to head out: Juniper has joined her trick-or-treating group that already consisted of Trucy, Vera, Jinxie, Athena, and Pearl, and Pearl still doesn’t have a costume, and now neither does Juniper, and Vera hasn’t finished making hers, and it’s T-minus two days until Halloween.

So he scrambled some eggs for his daughter and ushered her out the door after making her promise to say hi to all of the other girls for him, and then he crawled back into bed. Barely three minutes after, his phone rang. That was marginally better than his phone ringing once he had fallen back asleep, but this deprives him of the chance of going back to sleep at all, probably, and actually it’s not better. Phoenix doesn’t know why he thought that. He squints at the tiny screen on his phone to see that an impossible amount of symbols, including what looks like some Japanese characters, a pentagram, and a simplified pixel art hand making a middle finger.

“Hello, Maya.”

“Niiick! I need you to settle a dispute!”

Phoenix groans. “Between who?”

“Hello.” Iris’ voice comes through as clear as Maya’s, clearer than humans ever are on phone calls. Magical speakerphone. Phoenix drops his face into his pillow.

“Iris says that the only one of Edgar Allan Poe’s stories to involve cannibalism was his one weird-ass novel that he never finished. But he’s gotta have had more than that right? He strikes me as a cannibalism kinda dude.”

“I don’t know,” Phoenix mumbles into his pillow, and then, resigned to his fate, he lifts his head and repeats clearly, “I don’t know. I’m not the literature guy.” He knows Shakespeare, and what he knows about Shakespeare is that he needs to keep Maya away from it, else she might decide that Puck is a role model. “Iris would have more of an idea than me.”

“Nick! You can’t take your ex’s side over me!”

Iris giggles in the background. “This is an argument about objective facts, Maya,” Phoenix says. “I’m not ‘taking sides’ personally.”

“Okay, but, Montressor was definitely saving Fortunado down there to chill him to a good eating temperature and then have him as a snack with the Amontillado. Like that’s gotta be why he killed him that way.”

That’s one of the few Poe stories Phoenix knows. He can answer this one. “There was no Amontillado,” he says wearily. “That was the whole point of the story, Maya. He lied about having the fancy wine to get Fortunado down to the catacombs because that was the best place to kill him quietly. There wasn’t any cask of Amontillado.”

Maya gasps. “What?” She sounds so betrayed that Phoenix almost laughs and almost feels bad. “He lied? He can’t lie!”

Now Phoenix does laugh. “What, did you think he was fae because elaborately killing someone for some unmentioned slights is a fae thing to do?” She sounds more scandalized at the lie part that the murder part, which, for anyone even slightly versed in fae culture, does make sense.

“Well—” Maya sputters. “Yeah!” She heaves an exaggeratedly loud sigh. “I guess The Cask of Amontillado really isn’t a story that implies cannibalism.”

“There was other wine in the wine cellar where he walled up Fortunado,” Iris says. “Perhaps one of those would pair with him just as well for Montressor’s meal as you imagine the Amontillado would.”

“You don’t need to patronize me,” Maya says, sounding less irritable than Phoenix expects. “But, oh, Nick, other question! Why would the narrator, obviously possessing greater strength and no morals, not simply eat the old man so as to get rid of his creepy staring eye and better muffle the treacherous tattletale heart?”

“Telltale,” Iris says. Maya groans at the correction.

“Bitch-ass snitch,” Phoenix says.

“No,” Iris says. “Definitely not. Now, to return to the heart of your question, Mystic—”

Maya and Phoenix both snicker. What follows is not a long silence, but it is a loaded one, and then Iris resumes speaking, her clipped tone betraying her annoyance with the inadvertent pun. “The heartbeat was not a real sound,” she explains, “but rather the psychological manifestation of his guilt at committing the murder.”

“Oh,” Maya says. “So it’s like when you want to get coffee you have to have a barista make it and hand you the cup because if you tried to serve yourself from a machine it always explodes back in your face. It’s not the machine that hates you, it’s you who hates you, and the machine is the expression of it!”

“That is…” Iris trails off, clicking her tongue in thought. “Actually, yes, similar, though no one but the narrator could hear the sound of the heart.”

“So he wasn’t fae either,” Maya says. “Otherwise the whole house would’ve been, ba-dum! That they all felt it! And then probably it would explode.”

“Y’know, if he had eaten the old man,” Phoenix says, because sometimes it is fun, a flex of creative muscles he doesn’t usually get to stretch, to play along with Maya when she has her inane musings, “he still would’ve heard the heart beating, right, because it was just in his head. But instead of yelling at the cops that it was under the floorboards—”

Maya knows where he’s going with it immediately; either he knows the way she thinks too well, or she knows him. “—dude woulda been yelling about hearing it in his own stomach. Man, can you imagine? You’re just some beat cop coming in to investigate and then the guy starts shrieking about killing a dude but instead of starting to tear up the floorboards to show you the body he starts trying to claw open his own stomach?”

Phoenix considers that. He decides that yeah, it would be pretty far over on the scale of fucked-up things he’s seen as a lawyer. Sort of like Matt Engarde tearing up his own face in despair and fury, but also way worse because it would involve definite cannibalism and possible disembowelment, depending on how far the narrator got in his attempts. “Yep,” he says. “That’d be fucked up.”

“You could write it,” Iris says. “Poe is public domain, is he not, and you an adult man who could get away with it under the name of ‘literary reimagining’ rather than it being called ‘fanfiction’.”

“No thanks,” Phoenix says. “I’m not gonna be the man who messes with the classics.” He’d pitch the idea to Larry if Larry made his name on literally anything other than wholesome life-affirming picture books. Actually, he still wouldn’t, because Larry is an artist as well as a writer and there’d be a chance that he’d turn it into painting rather than prose and that is a level of horror Phoenix doesn’t want to go to. Better just to stay on the level of Maya reading cannibalism into every horror story that crosses her path.

(Would Athena call that projection? He is not going to think about that any longer.)

“Glad anyway you could help with our dispute,” Maya says. “Cuz” - she’s never settled on one nickname for Iris, but cousin or a derivation usually means she’s not angry with her - “was getting wistful when Pearly went off to talk shop with all your daughters, so she wanted to get in the holiday spirit and it spiraled. I made it spiral.”

As tends to happen around there. As Maya is wont to do. Phoenix isn’t surprised. He also decides to ignore the “daughters” remark. It’s not worth arguing that Trucy is his only daughter, and okay maybe Vera half counts, but on the other end of the spectrum, he’s known Juniper for not even a week.

So instead he voices the matter that is bothering him. He’s afraid to speak it into the world lest she hadn’t thought about it, but he also needs to be prepared. “So, Maya,” he begins warily, “you planning on venturing out for Halloween?”

He’s dreaded this holiday ever since that first year, when she figured out what trick-or-treat meant and decided that this was the most fae of holidays, what with one being allowed to threaten and extort strangers for goodies. It’s more blatant than the fae usually are, even. That first year, he had to keep her entertained and distracted all night, with candy and other sugary sweets and campy movies, so she couldn’t go and fulfill her suggestion of egging Edgeworth’s car as revenge for him being “a huge douchebag to us in court”. She had gotten the eggs ahead of time and stashed them in his fridge so at eleven they made a run to the corner store for other ingredients to teach her how to make omelets.

“Nah, don’t worry, I’m staying right here. Pearly can have her fun. But you and I are totally on for our post-Halloween bargain bin on-sale candy shopping spree. You’re buying! It’s tradition.”

“Huh?” It happening three years in a row, and then not for the next seven years, does not a tradition make. “Objection!”

“Nope!” She sounds positively gleeful; he can picture exactly what her smile looks like, how wide and toothy. “Ignored! What’s it that judges say again - overruled! You are overruled! And your penalty is reading Poe for a refresher so we can talk about it more! We need to talk about the one with the cat because I can’t decide if the cat is fae! Or even if it’s one cat! I want everyone’s input!”

His phone display shows a pixel jack-o-lantern with a grin in a probable approximation of Maya’s. He drops his head back onto his pillow. “Goodbye, Maya.”

The second Halloween, they carved pumpkins in the office; Pearl demanded they not have scary faces, Maya ate half of the seeds even before they roasted them, and Phoenix tried not to think about how last year at that time Edgeworth was around that they could consider the prospect of egging his car. When they dropped pumpkin guts on the floor, Mia flung it right back at them to get it stuck in their hair. The third year, they brought Pearl along for candy shopping, too, and she sat in the cart atop a throne of bagged sweets and pointed out clearance decorations she wanted for next year. They’re boxed up somewhere. He should find them for her and the other girls. For next year, or seven years later, it’s not that much of a difference, is it?

“And,” he adds, “I’ll see you in November.” Start anew. “Tradition, right?”

#fae au extras #roddy fanfics #fae au tag #fic: the witches of los angeles #Wolf would you believe i had this concept BEFORE talk started of the poe musical in chat

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biting-you · 6 years ago

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*kicks down door* HELLO YA’LL GUESS WHOSE BACK!!! THIS SACK OF POO POO! I’m finally finally finally posting this commission for a lovely anon who is honestly a saint. They wanted a sort of fantasy Overwatch Au with Soldier 76′s Jack Frost skin!

You felt so cozy, wrapped up in your little cocoon of blankets while you dozed peacefully, dreaming and unperturbed by nothing. Well that is until you felt many tiny hands start to poke and prod at your face. It woke you up, obviously, but you kept your eyes shut tight hoping that your annoying house guests would get the message and leave you alone. Of course you would have no such luck as they continued their assault, continuing to pinch at your skin, giggling all the while. “Christ, jeez I’m up, I’m up!” You finally relented and sat up, opening your eyes to glare properly at the pests who decided to wake you up from your slumber. Three little winged humanoids floated in front of you, cheeky grins split across each of their faces. The fact that they were faeries was of no surprise of course. The little buggers had been the bane of your existence ever since you could remember. Still, it didn’t mean you ever got used to it, especially when they woke you up far too early. “I have in alarm set, you know?” you muttered which only caused them to laugh harder and fly out your bedroom door toward your kitchen, most certainly to make some sort of mess in there. Deciding it was easier to get up than face the wrath of the faeries again, you swung your legs out of bed and proceeded to start going about your normal getting ready for work routine. ________________________________________ After putting out a few fires that you were more than certain those little winged rats had intentionally, you finally stepped out of your home and began to make the sort walk to the bus stop. As you walked, you made sure to say good morning to your neighbors like usual. Just because you had a bad start to your day doesn’t mean you wanted others to have one too. You waved to the small family of gnomes that lived under the loose tiles of the walkway, giving a friendly pat on the head to the black shuck that guarded the local cemetery and made sure to give a lock of your hair to the pixies that lived in the old elm near the town hall. It was a simple routine, but it was your routine. Though you knew good and well how strange it must look to others that you were interacting with things that weren’t there. Well, to them at least. But at this point in your life, when you were starting to become a true adult with a job and an apartment and bills to pay, you decided that you really didn’t care if people thought you were odd anymore. You weren’t about to ignore the lovely creatures you had known all of your life just because strangers would give you side long glances and whisper to each other behind their hands. If there was one thing to learn from mythical creatures was to not give a shit. You arrived at the bus stop with plenty of time to spare, which was both a blessing and a curse as you had to distract yourself from your idle time. At this rate you could have actually stopped to have a very tiny cup of morning tea with that lovely elf family. Oh well, social media it was then. You soon were lost in the variety of memes and lovely art that your friends posted on a daily basis, so lost in fact that you didn’t even notice a familiar petite brunette slid right up to your side and peer over your shoulder. “You got games on your phone?” You nearly jumped out of your skin when you felt her voice so close to your ear, letting out short shriek that made the heads of the other bus stop patrons turn to you briefly before shrugging it off. You clutched at your chest before turning to look sharply at the mischievous faun was giving you a sharp toothed grin, obviously proud of herself for scaring you so easily. “Hana, goddamnit how many times do I have to tell you not to do that?” You hissed. She cocked her head to the side and feigned counting in her head. “Mmm about 30 million,” You scoffed at her answer and shook your head. “I’m not in the mood today, I already didn’t get enough sleep thanks to those winged pests.” “Well if those ‘winged pests’ had actually done what I told them then you wouldn’t be sitting here at all!” You gave her an odd look. “Hana what are you talking about?” For the first time ever since you’ve known her, the usually cherry face of the faun turned serious her mouth set in a straight line as her brow furrowed in worry. “Look, I’m not supposed to tell you this, let alone even really know about this but...” Her dark brown eyes flashed around nervously looking very much like a deer caught in the headlights. “Just...don’t go through any doorways okay?” “I’ve been through like two in my house alone” You answered. Was this some weird new type of prank she was trying out? You didn’t really like it at all. She was quick to shake her head, looking even more upset now. “It wouldn’t happen inside of your home, a lot of us made sure to try and lock it down from any real bad forces but...we can’t really do it anywhere else.” She grabbed tightly onto your arm. “So that’s why you have to go back home right now! I mean, you’d probably have to stay there until they lost interest, which could be awhile, but it’s better then what they want!” “You’re not making sense at all! Who’s ‘they’, Hana?” You saw the muscles in her jaw tense and you swore she looked like she wanted to cry. “Th-The Seasons!” She finally sobbed out, breaking down into an unconsolable mess, “they want to take you away!” Before you could pry more answers out of her or try to comfort her in any sense, she bounded away quickly, not looking back. As you rode the bus to your work, you took the time to mull over Hana’s words. Not that you could think of anything else. There was no way it could be some sort of joke or prank. Hana was a pie in the face type of jokester not a ‘the most powerful elemental fae want to kidnap you’ asshole. But even still, you couldn’t really make sense of it. What in the hell would they want with you? Had you done something wrong? Perhaps disrespected them in some unknown way? No, you were sure you would have been told by another fae sooner if you had done something wrong, so that couldn’t be it. You heard plenty of tales of fae snatching humans plenty of times before but they were usually babies that were replaced with changelings or people who had actually wandered into fae territory on their own, never had you heard of a fae not to mention a high ranking one, go so far out of their own way to take a human. None of them liked to work that hard, it was just in their nature! And what was all this business with doors? It wasn’t like they could just throw a net over you and drag you away as soon as you crossed a threshold without risking making a scene. You were stumped and more than a little on edge by the time you reached your stop and made another short walk to your job. However as soon as you approached the glass doors that led into the large office building you paused, much to the chagrin of those behind you, who simply pushed past and entered. You watched them as they did so, absolutely nothing happening to them. No trolls came crashing through the ceiling or goblins scurrying out of the ventilation system to snatch away any unsuspecting human. Absolutely nothing. So taking a deep enough breath to make your lungs ache, you pushed open the door, ready to hear the familiar muffled tap of your flats hitting gray carpeting. Except there wasn’t any carpeting. Just smooth polished stone that caused your footsteps to echo around the large and ornate room you were in. Gone were the cubicles, gone was the water cooler, and gone was the world you’ve always known, replaced by marble and gold leafing and four very strangely dressed men, one of whom looked like he was about to explode from excitement.

“You’re here, you’re here! We finally get to meet you after all these years!” You were almost knocked off your feet by a very fast and very strong green and white blur that wrapped you in an almost rib shattering hug. It most certainly did not help your disorientation. “Eh heh, Genji you gotta put her down. She ain’t lookin’ too hot.” A low but kind voice came to your rescue and you were reluctantly released. “What is...what...I don’t understan-I think I might pass out,” You wobbled on your feet, threatening to fall backwards only for the same hands as before grab onto your shoulders. “Don’t do that! Just sit down here and I’m sure the urge to faint will pass in a moment.” You felt your tush hit a very soft and very comfy armchair and immediately you slumped back into it, closing your eyes and placing a hand over them as you waited for the dizziness to pass. When you finally felt well enough to open them and pick your head up, you were met with the eyes with the four men from before, all starring at you intently. “Feel better?” The first one asked, dark but humorous eyes searching your face for any other sign of discomfort. “Yea, uh...I think so,” you answered stiffly, still unsure of what to make of the whole situation. “Do you think you could like...just tell me where I am?” “Well, there is no name for it in any human language, though the closest thing to it would be calling it the Fae-Wilds! Does that help any?” Oh no. Oh NO. “Ok..okay...” you replied trying to keep calm “so if I just so happen to be in the Fae-Wilds...where all the high ranking fae live...then your four must be...” “The Seasons,” A gruff voice answered for you, coming from a man clad in the most gothic looking outfit you could imagine and to top it all off his head just happened to be a flaming jack-o-lantern. “And we have been very excited to meet you in person!” The green haired man said, reiterating his statement from earlier. You could only nod dumbly at his statement, feeling you like you might really pass out this time. “Sorry darlin’, we didn’t mean to overwhelm ya none, heck we didn’t even get to greet you properly!” The second man spoke, grinning at you from under the brim of his straw beach hat. Why the hell were they dressed like this? “Name’s Jesse, that there’s Genji,” He gestured his chin to the green haired man who beamed at you, “Gabriel,” the man if the pumpkin head grunted in response “and that there is...well that’s Jack.” You could physically feel the mood of the room change as soon as Jesse spoke the last mans name. You suddenly felt chilled and frightened and the feeling only heightened as you made eye contact with the afore mentioned Jack. His eyes were a terrible and dangerous shade of blue, so sharp and piercing you felt as if they were looking right down into the depths of who you are. You didn’t care for it at all. Thankfully the tension was slightly broken by Jesse letting out an awkward cough that dragged your attention back over to him. He gave you a weak smile and for a moment sadness crossed over his brown eyes before leaving just as quickly as it appeared. “Well, now that introductions are all said and done, I’m bettin’ you’re wonderin’ just why you’re here, arentcha darlin’?” You gave a slow nod of confirmation. A chair seemed to materialize out of know where before you, Jesse quickly taking a seat and leaning forward with his hands between his knees, his face still kind but serious. “I won’t beat around the bush with ya honey suckle, you deserve to know what’s goin’ on and ya don’t need no big speech explain’ it to you so...” He took a deep breath before continuing. “We want to make a deal with you, sweet heart. Nothin’ dangerous I promise you that but you still might now care for it...” He trailed off as his eyes flickered over to Jack who was staring a bit too intensely. “All we want if for you too stay here for a month, just a month! To see if you like it...if you feel any sort of attachment here...or to any of us. Now if you don’t of course, we’ll send you back fair and square and we won’t bother you like this again.” Too say that you were stunned was an understatement, in fact you could barely speak! The only words you could choke out were “...why?” Gabriel was quick to answer, “Do you know how rare it is for a human to have your ability? One in a goddamn million chance. Makes you kind of special don’t you think? You’re like a fae magnet with this gift of yours, you have no idea how precious humans are to our kind, especially one that can already see us.” “Okay...I have a gift, so what?” It doesn’t mean you can keep me here for a whole month!” You spat out, finally through with your shock and now moving into anger. “Look we know this isn’t probably...ideal and trust me honey this wasn’t my first choice either...” His eyes trailed back nervously to Jack “but like I said before you can go back if you don’t like it here when the month is through.” You eyed him warily and you had a strange feeling you actually didn’t have much of a choice anyway, it wasn’t like you knew the way out of the Fae-Wilds on your own. “Fine...fine I’ll take your little deal...but I’m not promising anything.”

Oh God why had you taken their deal? Why hadn’t you just said ‘fuck it’ and try to run? It had only been a week and the affections (if you could call them that) from the four men were already draining you of any and all patience you had left. It was a toss up between Jesse and Genji for being the worst of your new tormentors. They were nice enough with their compliments and boyish wooing but their constant need for physical affection made you want to retch at the best of times. Jesse would whine and complain even if you so much as leaned away from him, never mind the absolute temper tantrum that would ensue if you managed to escape out of his suffocating grasp. Your hair never seemed to be without Genji’s fingers tangled through them and he had a bad habit of putting so many damn flowers in your hair that you started attracting bees. You were really starting to miss those faeries back home. Thankfully, Gabriel was a much more tolerant presence to be around (though that wasn’t saying much). You could hardly count the many time he dragged you from your room to his own quarters and demanding you spend time with him. It was always at the worst hours too, like three in the morning just to drag you to a meal he had made especially for you, slamminh you down in a chair even when you protested that you already ate. “Sit there and stare at it for all I care,” He had gruff. At least he kept his hands off you for the most part. Then there was Jack. The good old God of winter never got close to you, never demanded that you spend any time with him. No. He would just stand and stare at you, no words spoken but a tentative greeting on your part and the continuous low muttering that came from the masked man. You hated it. You hated him. That icy chill that you would receive whenever he stepped foot into the room was both from his presence and his powers. Jack made you feel so frozen, so…isolated whenever he was around, you were sure that even in a room full of people, he could make you feel like the last person on Earth. It was the middle of the tenth day of you being stuck in the Fae-wilds (you made sure to keep close track of the days until you could leave) and Jesse had managed to drag you to a small pond located inside one of the many rooms in the castle that they all reside in. Despite the fact that it was in a building, the body of water was surrounded by vegetation, something Jesse wouldn’t stop talking about as he lounged beside you. “I invented those, you know,” he drawled, pointing at the water lilies that floated calmly on the crystal clear water. You gave him a small hum of feigned interest which made him squeeze your hand with a grin, at least tnat was all he was grabbing onto at the moment, perhaps he was finally catching on that you didn’t care to be groped every waking hour of the day. “Genji likes to claim he made them first but everyone ‘round here know that I-“ Jesse cut himself off when a chill suddenly engulfed the room, quickly turning your puffs of air into dense clouds and covering the pond with a fine frost. You didn’t bother turning around at the enterloper, knowing by this point it was better to ignore him out right. Jesse on the other hand seemed more then happy to stare as Jack hovered near the entrance, face concealed behind that damned mask he never went without. You felt the man beside you already starting to fidget at the others presence, casting you a nervous look as he debated whether to leave you alone with Jack, or tough out the feeling of what was most likely a heated glare bore into the back of his skull. He chose the former.

“I’ll uh…I’ll see you later sweetheart, okay? At dinner tonight?” You only gave him a nod and another hum as he stood and gave you a sheepish grin as he brushed the imaginary dirt off his trousers. You didn’t acknowledge him further as he walked away, a wary eye trained on Jack as he slipped past him and out the door.

If there was one thing that Jack was good for it was getting the others out of your hair. They all seemed to fear him for some reason or another, even Gabe seemed to give him a wide enough berth. You couldn’t truly understand why. Wouldn’t they all be on equal ground with powers and such? You mulled this over while you pretended the pond was oh so interesting to further try and let the man behind you know that you weren’t interested in whatever stunt he was trying to pull at all. A routine silence fell over the two of you and you assumed that would be the same song and dance that usually took place during your encounters so you damn near had a heart attack when the deep rumble of his voice echoed through the room.

“Are you enjoying your time here, stardust?”

You turned your head around so fast you gave yourself minor whiplash. He hadn’t moved at all and for a brief moment you thought maybe he hadn’t spoken at all and your mind was playing some kind of strange trick on you. Still you responded.

“What do you think?” You snapped back and it made him cock his head to the side as if puzzled.

“No? You don’t seem like it. You haven’t tried to escape once or offer another deal to get yourself out sooner.” You scoffed.

“What good would that do me? It’s better to wait out this bullshit until the month is out and the four of you won’t ever pester me again,” Scowling, you turn back to the pond, set on ignoring him yet again. You were so wrapped up in your loathing that you didn’t notice his approach until you felt the icy puff of his breath on the back of your neck.

“So you don’t love them then?”

The shock of his closeness almost had you stumbling into the lake as your body lurched forward only for him to grab onto your bicept with a near crushing grip as he hauled you to your feet.

“What the hell-let go!” you spat as you tried in vain to pry his fingers from your arm.

“Answer the question, stardust,” he hissed behind his mask, tugging you closer so his face was uncomfortably near to your own.

“Of course I don’t love any of them, you creepy.” You glowerd at him as he gave a hum, satisfied by your answer enough to loosen his grip ever so slightly.

“Interesting…so who will you be choosing at the end of the month?” His reply made you scoff again.

“No one, obviously,”

He barked out a laugh that made you recoil in fear. You did not like that sound at all.

“It’s so cute that you still think you have a choice! Not to mention how funny it is that the others are still trying to con you into believeing you still have any other options at all!”

“What are you talking about?”

With a click and a hiss he removed his mask with his free hand, tossing it to the floor carelessly. His eyes were wild his expression unhinged as he grinned down at you.

“Do you really think you were going to be allowed to leave us? Leave me…” His expression softened for a fraction of a moment before twisting up with sick glee once more. “Hell, you sealed your own fate by eating foot we offered you! I was actually surprised by that. Thought you would starve to death before you fell for that old trick.” Your eyes widened. Oh Gods, he was right. How could you be so stupid! That was the first rule of interacting with any sort of fae! Jack laughed at your stunned expression.

“Aw, I know stardust, I know,” he cooed mockingly “but it’s going to be alright.” Jack leaned in closer, pressing his face into the crook of your neck and inhaling your scent, “you’re going to be with me. Forever! Won’t that be grand?”

#overwatch #yandere overwatch #yandere soldier 76 #soldier 76 #jack frost #Jack Morrison #yandere x reader #reader insert

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thetapirsarehyperfixating · 7 years ago

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ive been making a lot of lists lately so here’s another one

DW characters that i would enjoy cuddling are good for cuddling + evidence:

susan foreman

she is clingy and totally cuddles. fight me

barbara wright

look there are two ways of looking at her: ripped or nah

ripped: hell yah shes good for cuddling, muscles = good warm grip as she holds u in her arms

nah: look at her face she is a good cuddler

steven taylor

i kno very little abt steven but he screams warmth and sof belly. those are key ingredients in cuddling potential

dodo chaplet

she is so smol she is bright and happy. conclusion?

“platonic cuddles ftw” - dodo probably

likes being the big spoon

two

yes. just. yes.

pro cuddler

jamie mccrimmon

has learned to be a good cuddler after spending time with two

jo grant

adorable ray of sunshine. practically canon that she’s a good cuddler.

leela

look dont @ me but...

of COURSE she is good for cuddling. she is murder knife babe r u telling me she WOULDNT jump on the opportunity to hold u

does that thing where youre like. resting ur head on her chest so she can basically totally envelop u in warmth and muscles and Boy Am I Gay For Leela

romana i

i imagine she would not be a cuddler but. boy howdy would she be a good cuddler

romana ii

only cuddles with those she trusts. likes being the little spoon. she may kill me for admitting this out loud

i had a whole discussion w/ my mom about this trying to explain hot takes, memes, spooning, and what makes a little spoon

she still doesnt get it

six

OKAY SHUT UP I KNOW BUT LIKE

WE ALL KNOW IT

SIX IS TOO PROUD TO ADMIT THEY LIKE CUDDLES

BUT THEY DOOOOOOO

eight

oh come on this is canon why am i listing it here

charley pollard

she is a Good. she may not cuddle bc u are not the Doctor but she is Sof and Good of Course she is Good For Cuddling

jack harkness

look @ the man. do u remember him at all? u know he has learned how to cuddle

donna noble

doesnt do spooning. she stares at ur face (if ur ok w/ that) as she holds u

river song

likes 2 stay face 2 face

she is Good for cuddles.........

LOOK DONT @ ME UNLESS ITS TO ADD MORE CONTENT

bill potts

ah yes. our Goddess

does a bunch of platonic cuddling bc cuddles r Good Content

likes cuddle piles

only @ me to add more content. thats it.

#lgbtdw #doctor who #dw #alternatively titled: An Incomplete List Of People Haven Is Gay For #this is tagged with lgbtdw bc i am Gay for all of them and for queer characters #haven says words

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wehavenoheroes · 7 years ago

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Some paladin headcanons yo

*HUNK* -He has anxiety which is kind of shitty when you have the pressure of /the whole universe's fate/ upon your shoulders -But he has been living with it for quite the time so he knows more or less what he has to do to calm himself down during a panick attack or a breakdown! -Still, there are moments when everything is simply overwhelming and he just need a shoulder to cry onto and someone to listen and rub his back (you've heard of Hunk helping Lance when he's homesick, now get ready for Lance helping Hunk when the situation is /just too much/) -He loves music with a passion (in part because it helps him with his anxiety), so he is the kind of friend who is ALWAYS singing. Humming some tunes while cooking or working on a new invent with Pidge, singing 80's pop songs in the shower; soft, relaxing ballades when someone in the team just can't sleep -Just imagine the paladins in an alien planet gathered around the fire and waiting for Allura and Coran to come pick them up, Hunk randomly starts singing a campfire song and everyone just goes with it -Coran teaching him some popular altean songs and being so excited when Hunk is!!! Genuinely!!! Interested!!!!! And now he sings them from time to time and it brings Coran, oh, so many memories -Okay so Hunk is a nice guy we all know that BUT let me tell you he ain't someone to mess around. Nu-huh. This one time Lance had one of his brilliant ideas for a late night plan and Hunk HAD warned him it would go wrong but Lance just wouldn't listen. In the end they both got grounded and Hunk was pretty mad at Lance so he decided to play a prank on him. Long story short, ended up without eyebrows. -Hunk then felt bad about it so he helped Lance every morning to paint them on his face until they grew back -Spoiler: as we all know Lance didn't learn his lesson -He has too moms! One of them (his biological mother) is samoan, the other one is british. He also has loooots of cousins. -He had some plants in his room back at home, sometimes he just wonders if they are doing well -Can't draw to save his own life -Has one one of this loud laughs that make you laugh too - *Keith*: -makes a super good comeback to some bitchy comment from Lance - *Hunk*: -Bursts out laughing super hard because that was just too good- *Lance* : -Betrayed Look™- *Hunk*: -Wiping off a tear- I'm sorry man, I just wasn't expecting that -When he is laughing a lot he will go into that Silent Mode™ where you can see he is laughing but he isn't really making any sound??? Also his belly will start bouncing -Once Lance made him laugh so hard he had to lay down afterwards -Have you seen the vine with the guy that says "So I'm sitting there, barbacue sauce on my titties..." and the girl loses her shit? That's them. *PIDGE* -Ticklish as hell. Literally _everywhere_ -Behind her knees and her armpits are her worse spots -This may seem adorable but *no*. She writhes and kicks when she's being tickled -She once hit Matt on accident while he was tickling her and made his nose bleed -Poor guy wasn't expecting that -She's a bit of a picky eater but mama & papa Holt raised her well so she always tries to eat everything when someone cooks for her -Back at home, Matt would be the first one to see her new invents, now Hunk and Shiro are! -She has never really had a crush, she isn't really interested in that for the time being, but she's starting to suspect that she prefers girls over boys -She suffers from migraines, and her head hurts a lot when she is tired -At that times she just needs to lay down in complete darkness and maybe a friendly hand massaging her temples -LOVES HORROR FILMS/BOOKS/VIDEOGAMES -Tbh she just loves anything related to horror and creepy stuff -She follows a bunch of youtube channels related to that -Has never shaved and doesn't plan on starting anytime soon -She is usually talks with memes and references to the pop culture. -She enjoys how practical and comfortable her short hair is but sometimes she looks at Allura or Keith and wishes she still had her long hair -She has an inside joke with Keith and they just start randomly singing the x-files theme and laugh their asses off - Lance: I can't find my jacket, I was sure I left it here yesterday Keith: -whistles the x-files song- Pidge: -snorts- *LANCE* -When he was a kid he watched HSM. It changed his life. -He became Sharpay, he knew all of her songs and dialogue by heart. He forced his older brother to play Ryan -On his 9th birthday his parents got him a pink boa and a toy mic because he had been asking for those LITERALLY NONSTOP for six months -When the mic ran out of batteries the whole neighbourhood was relieved -If you tell him you prefer camp rock over hsm he will lose faith in you -Says "holy moly" and "see you later, alligator" completely unironically -He has an ongoing battle about this, because he firmly belives it makes him sound cool but no one agrees -Only Shiro supports him -He can really sing. Like. The boy has some pipes. -Once they were at the common room hanging and Hunk and him started singing disney songs but when they got to Poor unfortunate souls he got over excited and really went for it -Allura droped the mug she was holding when he hit the high notes -Now sometimes he and Hunk will go around singing and everyone just listen to them feeling Blessed™ -he tried to give himself an earring -it did not end well -at all -His low self esteem comes in part from his early teen years, when puberty hit him. He got really really tall really soon. He was enven thinner and lankier than he his now and a couple assholes made a lot of fun of him because of it. -Now he is comfortable with his body though he wishes it was easier for him to gain muscle -Hunk and him met when they were 14 and really bonded over their insecurities and comforted each other, happy to have found someone who UNDERSTOOD -loves makeup and used to wear a lot of fun eyeshadows looks back on earth (only on weekends though, it was forbidden to wear makeup at the garrison). He really misses it -His favourite band is The cat empire! *KEITH* -He eats A LOT. And when I say a lot I mean he could devour a pot of spaghetti all by himself and still be hungry for dessert. -He likes everything but has a sweet tooth -Always wears socks. Dumb socks. -He has ones that he found at a dollar store that have an orange sonic and under it THE NINJA TURTLES written in comic sans -they are his favourites -found out he was gay thanks to watching gerard way dance in mcr lives on youtube -he was his first crush -aaah, adolescence, what a beautiful thing -Despises Jack Black for some reason. He refuses to watch his films -Has long hair because he is way too lazy to cut it -Kinda uncomfortable with romantic relationships? Like maybe he has a crush but still he wouldn't know how to maintain a relationship with him. Really wants to try tho -Sings The death of a Bachelor shouting in the shower -how do I LIIIIIIIIVEEEE - Shiro: wow Keith, it's 6am and you are already up, you really woke up early today Keith: -with bloodshot eyes twitching after 6 coffes and 8 hours watching conspiracy documentaries- what.

#voltron legendary defender #lance mcclain #pidge gunderson #katie holt #keith kogane #hunk garrett

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not-poignant · 8 years ago

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I just as i was trying to fall asleep headcanon of augus or ash depending kissing gwyn untill his lips were so so oversensitive and gwyn is just .... i can't cope cannot cope and also the same with pitch andjack i just think you write such sensual kisses and i can just imagine augus or pitch kissing gwyn and jack untill they are just so so so so into the kissing. Also for the kink meme Augus- a, B , m , p the same for ash but w instead of a is that's okay

Mmm, that sounds awesome, and they would totally do that as well. I’m not even sure Jack was hugely into kissing until he met Pitch and was like ‘yeah, yeah I totally get it now, I’m there, kissing is great.’ :D

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Augus - These days, Augus is able to give as much aftercare as he wants, since he’s got a partner who has a blood oath that will trigger whenever he tries to leave it .That’s made Augus actually more indulgent than he used to be.

Augus isn’t in a habit of falling asleep after sex, though he’ll sometimes doze. He’s so used to having to stay awake for some time after sex that he tends to become quite alert.

Augus is generally very grateful at receiving aftercare, in the rare moments that Gwyn will top. He sets a good example in that sense, but the truth of it is that Augus just likes being fussed with. :D

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Augus - Augus’ favourite body parts of his own that he likes most are generally connected to the parts of him that he uses most to control others - voice, hands, cock etc. or the parts of him that he connects to comfort and sensuality - hair, neck and back of the head. He’s always known he’s completely attractive as the perfect package (he was sought after by the Raven Prince just because of how he looked), so he’s not insecure about his appearance.

In terms of Gwyn, he actually finds all of Gwyn attractive, lol. I think he kind of loves that a lot of the fae world finds Gwyn ugly, and he sort of finds that fascinating. But specifically, he likes Gwyn’s thighs/arms (Gwyn is strong) and his ass. Augus just wants to poke it or generally do terrible things to it all the time.

Ash - Ash has a capacity - the same capacity that Augus has - to find anyone, regardless of gender, body type etc. attractive. So in that sense, Ash has no turn offs re: attraction. In terms of what might draw him to one person over another, it’s usually personality or how they’re behaving, especially if those behaviours draw his predator closer. Attraction for both of them is muddled by the prey drive and how that tangles into their sex drive. Subsuming ‘I’d like to murder someone’ into ‘I want to fuck you’ doesn’t always translate to ‘your ass is hot.’

Ash thinks of himself as being attractive, but he’s not as secure about it as Augus is, and will sometimes fall back on glamour. But over time, Ash has grown to like the things about himself that stand out the most in the fae world as making him an ‘anomaly’ - his shorter hair, his eyes, his shorter height, his ability to put on muscle (Augus doesn’t really have this) etc.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Augus and Ash - This answer will cover both Augus and Ash actually, since their sex drive is tied up in their prey drive, and so - they tend to be more turned on by someone who will display submissive behaviour around them. It doesn’t have to be obvious, in fact sometimes it’s better if it’s tied up in someone who needs to fight with themselves too, to surrender.

Both Augus and Ash get off on using their voices to seduce someone. This is in part because their biological nature dictates that they use their voices to paralyse someone and literally seduce them. Like, it’s built into what they are, to use their voice to take control of someone else.

Points where they differ is that Augus does like to think about scenes he’s going to construct and that will turn him on, whereas Ash prefers spontaneity and making things up on the fly.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Augus - Augus changes depending on the client, but what he prefers is slow and sensual. Even when he’s fast, he’s still notably very sensual about it. Augus will do whatever the hell he feels like with Gwyn, everything works to his favour, lol.

Ash - Ash generally prefers faster and rougher, though like Augus, he sees the merits in all paces.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Ash - Ash hooks up in the fae world more often than his brother realises, and actually has a pretty extensive track record of having slept with some of the most famous or ‘significant’ fae around. This is something we’ll discover officially in The Ice Plague when it turns out he’s on speaking terms (among other things) with the Gancanagh. Additionally, while he never sleeps with the same human again after spending time with them, he has a few ongoing ‘friends with benefits’ relationships with fae, and some of those fae are really quite evil. He has a good track record of being genuinely not that judgemental of Unseelie fae, and it’s one of the reasons he jokingly called the Nain Rouge ‘grandma.’

From this kink meme.

#asks and answers #Ash Glashtyn #Augus Each Uisge #kink meme #fae tales #fae tales verse #Ash is rarely in the fae world #and when he is #he's there to get access to good booze #see his brother #and fuck around and gather gossip #Augus has literally no idea lol #administrator Gwyn wants this in the queue #Anonymous

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mstigergun · 8 years ago

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OC Kiss Week, “the temple of pride”

OC Kiss Week, Day Three! (”A Surprise Kiss”)

ASK AND YE SHALL RECEIVE, JACK. So, Leonid Trevelyan and Tristran Lavellan (who I’ve chosen to run with in his alternate incarnation as Tristran Samahl from the Companion meme @neurotrophisfactors did -- linked earlier). On the one hand, this was hilarious to write, because Leonid is a bag of trash. On the other hand, Tristran is pure and good and Leonid is a corrupting force, and so I also felt slightly bad. Especially because of the blowjob joke at the end. OH WELL.

Set pre-Haven. All of the liberties taken with plot, lore, etc., etc., because I do what I want.

[~2500 words, because whoops]

the temple of pride

In his short and illustrious years, throughout which he has acquired no small amount of worldly knowledge, Leonid has come to realize several things.

The first is that everyone with a set of eyes and even a vague sense of what’s bound to be a good time will want to kiss him. Which is sensible, really: he’s always been wonderfully handsome, and he’s a great deal of fun, and even if the poor, beleaguered parties involved only manage to wrest a single kiss from him –

Ah, well. The stuff glorious memories are made of.

For them, really. Leonid can’t be bothered to remember all of the people he’s fucked, much less the innumerable number of people – from every blessed and wretched corner of Thedas – he’s kissed. In taverns or on street corners, in servants’ kitchens or on ballroom floors.

Once, he even kissed a city guard who thought Leonid’s public drunkenness was a little too drunken and much too public. Which had been all well and good: kissing while being very nearly arrested turned out to be as effective as a key to a lock in getting him out of trouble. Especially when kisses were followed with a terribly unsubtle mention of his family name and an additional… private moment or two.

So, yes. He understands that everyone would like to kiss him. Well, everyone with even a scrap of good taste.

The second thing Leonid realizes is that circumstance makes even the most circumspect of men a great deal more free in their affections. No one likes to be uncomfortable – which is why, in part, he’d been able to so efficiently fuck his way through Haven. A new man each night – sometimes more than one! – with what amounted to very little of Leonid’s usual eyelash fluttering and clever lines (or blunt suggestions that are inappropriate for any sort of public space, which has never stopped Leonid before – not once in his life).

When men are sad, or cold, or in unpleasant circumstance of any sort, Leonid is, he knows, the balm to that particular wound. He is a breath of fresh air, a sweet moment of amnesia and a reminder of much better things. It is, he has come to think, perhaps one of his life’s purposes: to be so truly spectacular a lover that he actually improves lives.

Why else would Andraste bless him with his face, or his particular talents? Her plan for the Herald was simple enough – save the world from being torn apart – and so Her plan for Leonid – save the world from being boring and save many men from not having a truly spectacular lover – might be less grand, true, but it is certainly no less important.

So, first, he understands that everyone would be fortunate to kiss him. Second, that misery – miserable places, wretched circumstance, ill-fitting clothes, a bad hand of cards – makes his particular abilities rather more effective.

And if ever he has been to a miserable place, the Forbidden Oasis is it: an Orlesian hellhole of rasping sand and too-bright skies that make sleeping off even part of a hangover impossible. The tunnels and pathways that twist around the oasis itself make as much sense as this whole blighted escapade, which is to say none. He nearly brings his own life to an inglorious halt when traversing a particularly rickety platform, and is only saved by the elf who’d been sent along to parse out whatever it is Solas’s stupid shards are for.

“Careful,” says the elf, his broad hand firm on Leonid’s bicep.

Leonid squints at him, his heart still fluttering from how very near he came – again – to falling from a ridiculous height and presumably breaking one of his limbs. The sun hangs in the sky behind Tristran, his ears a pair of broad and pointed shadows.

“I hardly need to be careful if you’re going to hover behind me and make sure I don’t die,” Leonid says, shrugging off the touch. “Which is, I can only assume, what we’re doing, as we haven’t gotten any closer to that blighted shard –” with an accusatory finger pointed to the glitter of light above them, on a platform that must require some sort of magic, or wings, or perhaps a gryphon, to reach – “in the past two hours of wandering around this Maker-forsaken dust pit.”

Tristran blinks his eyes, which, Leonid has to distantly admit, are a rather lovely golden brown, even in the shadows of the cliffs around them. Then, with a breezy sigh, “You caught me. It’s true: the shards are a ruse. The Herald really just wanted you to wander around, cursing and complaining, and I’m just here to keep you safe. With, you know,” he reaches one hand down, taps it against his leg, “my agility.”

Leonid snorts despite himself. He'd hate for the man to think he's funny, even if he is, but the endless hours of sunshine have addled Leonid’s brain and left him without his usual stoic good sense. A battle lost, then.

Leonid half-turns, casting a look toward the path below them. It had been full of Ventari earlier, before the Qunari mercenaries had cleared it out. “It’s why I’m testing you, with the nearly plunging to my death. Keep you on your toes. All five of them.”

“You’re too kind, Trevelyan. A paragon.” His voice is dry, but when Leonid glances back, Tristran’s mouth is tugged up at one corner. Amused.

“Yes, yes,” Leonid says with a wave of his hand, a little flush of pleasure prickling between his shoulders. “It’s not easy being this virtuous, you know. I can’t expect you to understand. All that time spent reading and writing reports – why, it’s a good thing you were paired with me today. How else would you understand what dutiful acquiescence looks like, when your nose is always buried in a book?”

“I can’t possibly imagine.”

A pause, as the pair of them look around the canyon, the curling pathways, the series of platforms and ladders that ultimately go nowhere..

“Maybe that tunnel?” Tristran suggests, leaning past Leonid to point at the dark space below them. And while the shadows are cool around them, he’s warm, as if he’s been baked in sunshine. Cured with firelight.

Leonid suppresses a little shiver. Instead, he nods. “So long as you deal with the spiders that will inevitably come crawling out of every blighted shadow. Do you know what spider innards do to my skin?”

And so onwards they go.

And although the elf doesn’t complain while they climb up and down what must be a hundred ladders, or while he does, indeed, kill a great number of giant spiders, or when they eventually retrieve the shard only to find that their way up cannot also be a way down and so spend the next hour sort out how to return to camp without, say, leaping on a passing giant and riding it toward the tents –

Well. Leonid knows what suppressed pain looks like. A tight mouth, twitching downward at its sides. Pale skin, even beneath all those freckles. Short and sharp breaths as they make their final walk toward camp. The merest hint of a limp.

And, really, Leonid thinks as he downs his ration of wine and sneaks around past the requisitions officer to get a second, he’s passable handsome, Tristran. Rather broad-shouldered for an elf. And he laughed at Leonid’s joke earlier by the fire, and so he must have at least an iota of good sense.

Leonid watches the researcher across the camp, feigning interest in the story one of the soldiers is regaling him with and being very careful to observe Tristran out of the corner of his eye as he downs his slightly sour wine. Tristran’s legs are stretched before him, one hand massaging the muscle just above his knee, the other paging thoughtfully through some dreadfully dusty tome.

“And so,” continues the soldier, “I told Bess not to fuss around with those ladders, not if she wanted us to be able to find our way back, but you know what Bess is like –”

“Hm.” He reaches out and plucks the soldier’s tin cup from her hand, replacing it with his empty vessel. “So you’ve said. In any case, I’ll be off. Things to do, you know. Letters. And things.”

She blinks up at him, but he’s on his feet and across the camp before her complaints about his thievery can reach him. Leonid edges around several of the small fires, sipping at his commandeered wine, until he draws to Tristran’s side.

“Just let me finish this passage,” says the elf, before Leonid can so much as get out a word. His finger – calloused, Leonid knows, and warm – traces a line of text, the skin of his forehead creasing with a thoughtful frown. Then, quiet and under his breath and said entirely and unacceptably to himself, “The spirit calmed, then elgar’arla, but…”

Maker help this sad elf. If ever there was a man in need of cheering, who could stand to be prised away from his blighted research and do something more fun than reading about lost elven temples and artifacts, then it is Tristran Samahl. And Leonid Trevelyan is quite naturally the one to do it. The fact that he rather likes the strength in Tristran’s hands, and the shape of his shoulders, and also is rather intrigued by his expressive mouth, is entirely beside the point.

“I need you for a moment,” says Leonid, plain. “Urgently.”

That wins his attention. “Of course,” Tristran says, closing his book and standing. The usual smile – slow and amused – is replaced with a more serious expression. Concerned. Noble, even.

Disgusting. If Leonid weren’t so inclined to be charitable, he might just shrug off the entire interaction.

But the night is young, and the next day bound to be as miserable as the last, and since the Qunari mercenaries are camped on the other side of the canyon – not, mind you, that he’s looking to repeat…

Leonid tilts his head to the side of camp, past a shallow brook to a small copse. Trees are few and far between in the wretched place, but do provide enough cover for a great number of things. As Leonid well knows. They splash across the water, climbing the small embankment to the trees, which curl into gnarled shadows around them.

Above, the sky is draped with stars – bright and cool after the blistering heat of the day. Leonid downs the last of his wine, tossing the cup at one of the trees. It pings off a low branch and thuds on the ground.

Tristran stands in the shadows, lined in the very distant light of the fire. His eyebrows inch up on his forehead. “So,” he starts.

“Shut up,” says Leonid, and then he steps forward and kisses Tristran, firm and certain. One hand catches the front of Tristran’s shirt, the other tucking itself firmly against the hot skin of his neck. For a moment, the world around them goes still – blessedly still – and the misery of the oasis dissolves into skin against skin, and warmth, and familiarity.

And just as Leonid is thinking that, even with the wooden leg, Tristran could very probably pin Leonid up against one of these trees, the elf pulls back.

“Right,” says Tristran, a little breathless. Leonid’s hand falls from his neck, and he squints at the elf in the dark. “This was, uh… Urgent?”

It’s said skeptically enough that Leonid feels heat flare underneath his skin, and not in the pleasant way.

“Well,” says Leonid. “Your leg hurts.”

The eyebrows crawl ever higher. The elf is all forehead. And shoulders, admittedly. And freckles, and broad hands. “It does that sometimes.” A beat, then, “Wait, are you – is this pity?”

“What?” asks Leonid, sharp. He scowls, blinking rapidly. “No, not at all! I don’t care about anyone else enough to pity them! But you’re in pain, and I’m bored because we’re stuck in the blighted desert in Orlais and –”

“You’re bored,” repeats Tristran.

Which is when Leonid remembers that, yes, while everyone wants to kiss him, and while people who are feeling especially down on their luck especially want to kiss him, there is a third truth he’s gleaned over the course of his illustrious youth: that things will invariably go sideways on him. And in this case sideways means kissing someone who doesn’t want to kiss you back, and then insulting him.

“Well, what,” Leonid cries, his hand dropping away. He folds his arms across his chest, something sour and stupid coiling beneath his ribs. Something fluttering and uncomfortable, like too many cups of coffee in the morning. “Did you expect me to say that I hauled you over here because I’ve fallen desperately in love with you after a day in the desert? That you’ve charmed me with your stupid books and jokes and swordplay?”

“Ah, no,” says Tristran, dry. “But then I wasn’t expecting you to haul me over here for a kiss either. Why? Have you fallen desperately in love with me after I valiantly saved your life?”

Leonid’s drawn half of a sharp breath with which to unleash a string of protestations when –

The elf’s stupid eyes are twinkling.

He finds this funny. He thinks –

“Oh, fuck off,” says Leonid, though the venom’s gone out of it. “I thought you could use a distraction.”

“As I said,” says Tristran, his lips in a lopsided grin as he leans easily against one of the trees, “you’re a paragon. So generous and thoughtful. Really, if I had to pick a word to describe you, it would be giving.”

Leonid snorts, rolling his eyes. But then –

It’s true that discomfort makes all the world more likely to seek comfort, and Leonid is unshockingly included in that. And the Forbidden Oasis is absolutely wretched, without anything resembling a redeeming trait beyond the fact that it’s not cold, and he hates wandering around looking for shards, and he hates how often he finds his thoughts settling on the Qunari mercenary camp, and –

His stare falls on Tristran again, steady. Thoughtful. “I can be giving,” Leonid says, slow. “And you did save my life today, even if it was mostly for your own battered sense of self-worth.”

“Right,” says Tristran, with a breathy laugh. “Really battered. I’m just standing over here, feeling sorry for myself. I wonder if anyone could help.”

Which is how Leonid ends up kissing him again. After all, one doesn’t just go around ignoring one’s calling.

Besides, if there is also a fourth thing Leonid knows, it’s this: when it comes to correcting a rare misstep, moving ever onward for the sake of his goals – namely, more men in his bed and fewer persistent thoughts of people he shouldn’t be thinking about – is always the better plan. After all, Leonid’s never had a hard time swallowing his pride when other, better things are on the table. Or in the desert. Whichever.

#ockiss17 #oc kiss week #tristran lavellan #leonid trevelyan #tana writes

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infotainmentplus-blog · 6 years ago

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Here are some things you can do when your phone is offline In 2018, it’s pretty uncommon that we find ourselves completely offline. However, dead zones and long flights remain an unavoidable part of life for many. Google Assistant now recommends things to do when you’re phone is offline, like playing games, but we’ve come up with a few options to add to the list. Without further ado, here are some things you can do when your phone is offline. Take advantage of offline storage If you know that you’re going to be going off the grid ahead of time, you have a tremendous advantage. Put those gigs of storage to use by downloading your favorite playlists or videos. Most streaming services offer this as an option. You can even save online articles for later perusal. Having a library of readables on your Kindle or Audible app can also help pass the time. That’s right: books are still a thing people make and, apparently, consume. If you haven’t jumped on the literary bandwagon, now’s your chance! See Also: 10 best offline apps for Android How to download YouTube videos for offline watching 10 best literature apps for Android Re-check for networks constantly Face it, you’re going to exhaust just about every obvious activity you can do with your phone while it’s offline pretty quick. When it happens, you’ll be tempted to check your network connectivity like a gerbil on a heroin drip. Go ahead and give into that temptation. The sooner you get reconnected the better. Refresh, refresh, refresh. Note that searching for networks sacrifices substantial battery life. Use Airplane Mode if you’re in a power-conservation situation (see what we did there?). If you’ve brought along a hefty power bank like a responsible tech enthusiast, you should be good to go. See Also: How to expand your battery life Use your device as a paperweight Sometimes paper doesn’t stay where it’s supposed to, which is why God invented paperweights. Most people pay good, hard-earned money for paperweights shaped like turtles or oversized diamonds, but your offline phone is just as effective at keeping paper still. To convert your phone into a paperweight, simply place the device on top of papers that you want to remain stationary. Now if someone opens a door briskly or cats invade your workspace, your papers will remain right where you put them. Prop open a window on a sunny day If you’re in a part of the world where the outside is more pleasant than the inside this time of year, let that good old fashioned fresh air into your home or office! Some older windows have trouble staying open, but with your trusty offline phone, you’ll let no summer breeze go to waste. Tackle that FOMO When you’re phone is offline, it’s easy to start thinking about all the activities that you’re likely missing out on. You might start imagining all the things your friends and family are almost certainly doing without you and how much fun they’re having. Don’t panic. What you’re experiencing is classic fear of missing out (FOMO). Your friends and family are almost certainly having buckets of fun without you There is currently no known cure to FOMO, which is not yet classified by the World Health Organization as an actual disease. However, spry mental gymnastics can get you back in good spirits in no time. The Oatmeal recommends converting FOMO into “JOMO,” the joy of missing out. Alternatively, we’ve found napping is a good countermeasure because it’s impossible to fear anything while asleep. Unless you’re prone to sleep paralysis, in which case it’s perfectly natural to fear the demon in the corner of your room. Talk to a stranger Many of us were raised to “Not talk to strangers,” but you’re, what, 22 now? 30? 57? Time to ditch “Stranger Danger” and strike up a delightful conversation with someone you’ve never met. Strangers are almost everywhere, but most of them are located outside of your home. That means you’ll probably have to leave or order pizza delivery to find one. Strangers are almost everywhere, but most of them are located outside of your home Once you’ve identified your stranger, you’ll need an icebreaker question to get the conversation flowing. We recommend softballs like “What is your deepest regret?” or “Do you suffer from any gastrointestinal conditions that complicate your day-to-day?” After you get the conversational ball rolling, let your natural charisma guide the conversation like the savvy social Sisyphus you know you are. Remember: strangers are just friends you haven’t met yet. Or dangerously unpredictable sociopaths. Or both! Play bocce ball Bocce is a lawn game with roots in Ancient Rome, a time when most phones were offline. As such, it’s a perfect activity for the typical offline user. To play, you’ll of course need a set of bocce balls. A solid set will likely run you between $30 and $40. If you find yourself looking at a $70 or more price tag, you’re likely overpaying. We recommend springing for a soft carrying case. Bocce can be played by two to four people, and involves throwing heavy balls at each other. The game is over when a team reaches 12 points Start by having one team toss out the smaller “jack” ball, which is usually white. This is called “delivering the jack.” The team that delivers the jack also makes the first bocce throw. The goal is to get your bocce closer to the jack than your opponent(s). After each team makes an initial throw, the team with a ball closest to the jack gets to throw all of their remaining bocci balls in succession. After their balls are thrown, the team with a ball next-closest to the jack throws the rest of their bocci balls, and so on. Master Sergeant Thomas, “The O’Malley Factor”, O’Malley and the Referee Mr. Bill Huges from the Santa Maria Lawn Bowling Club measure the distance between the two Bocce Balls during Combat Bocce Ball Tournament on Friday May 5, 2007 at the 381st Training Group of the U.S. Air Force. The event was put on as one of the 381st Training Group Quarterly Events to ensure morale stays high. (Photo by Nichelle K I Griffiths) Remember, it’s completely legal to hit the jack with a bocce ball. This can radically change a round by moving the nucleus of play away from players who have already made their throws. Once all the balls are thrown, determine which team has a bocce ball closest to the jack. Only that team will score points this round, and any other teams receive no points. Tallying points is simple. If your ball is closest to the jack, you get a point for each bocce ball that is closer to the jack than the next-closest bocce ball that doesn’t belong to you. If one of your balls is physically touching the jack at the end of a round, this is called a “kiss” or “baci” and worth two points. Once points are tallied, the bocce balls are collected and the winning team delivers the jack to start the next round. The game is over when a team reaches 12 points. However, if you’re losing when a team reaches 12 points, you can insist that the game last to either 15 or 21 points to keep your ego intact. With all the fun you’re having now, memes and emails are probably the furthest thing from your mind! Contemplate the heat death of the universe Remember, the inexorable expansion of the universe will eventually isolate our galaxy within a causally disconnected void. The remaining stars will collapse and fizzle, replaced by a bleak abyss choked with black holes and increasingly inert interstellar gas. With no way to inject more energy into this closed system, all life will go the way of Motorola. Eventually, even black holes will leak their energy via Hawking radiation over millennia, shrinking and ultimately evaporating completely. Considering the magnitude and inevitability of this slide into mindless entropy doesn’t have any practical use, but you might dwell on your comparative insignificance and transience long enough for your phone to find a network connection again. Prank your friends In the hit Willy Wonka movies, poor Charlie Bucket found a golden ticket concealed beneath the wrapper of his coveted Wonka Bar. We don’t recommend storing gold next to chocolate — heavy metal poisoning is a serious condition with myriad symptoms that can take years to manifest. However, you could conceal your phone in a repurposed wrapper to the surprise and delight of your friends. For instance, a Samsung Galaxy Note 8 fits nicely inside a “king size” Hershey’s Gold Peanuts & Pretzels bar. Imagine your friend’s surprise when, instead of caramel creme surrounding a salty crunch, they find a practically unusable smartphone. You got ’em! A regular Jack Vale, you are. The best part: you get to eat the candy ahead of time. Pro Tips: You’ll want to use a very mild glue to reattach the packaging after you carefully open it. We recommend eyelash glue, which adheres unobtrusively to cellophane and is easy to clean if any gets on your phone. Apply with included brush, hold in place for 30 seconds, and leave it for an hour to fully set. Don’t forget to ask for your phone back. It’s expensive. Intervene if your friend actually attempts to eat the device. Learn how to play the guitar All that time you’ve been Redditing or looking at your friends’ vacation pictures could have been spent developing a skill! Now that those distractions are no longer an option, it’s time to dust off that old Fender you borrowed from your brother three years ago and learn an E chord. You’d be surprised by the progress you can make by just devoting 30 minutes per day to an activity. It only takes about that long to learn all the main chords in a single sitting, but you’ll have to wait on muscle memory to kick in before you can switch between them naturally. The key here is consistency. Set aside a time every day, and get to strumming. See Also: Learn to Play the Guitar in 10 Hours Deal: Portable Smart Guitar, Learn Anywhere! Best apps for musicians We actually recommend learning on an electric guitar rather than acoustic. The reasoning here is that finger-positioning is of the utmost importance, and practicing that over and over again will annoy the hell out of your roommate, dog, neighbor, or dad if you’re using an acoustic. Electric guitars without an amp are quiet, but you can still hear if you’re hitting the chords correctly. Learn your chords, then work through Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash over and over again while lying on the couch and binge-watching Altered Carbon on Netflix. Make a list of your accomplishments Lists aren’t just for things to do, they can also be for things you’ve done! While your phone is offline, set aside a few moments to take stock of your life. What have you done with it? Are you happy with where you are? Are you in a better situation now than last year? Have you watched all of Altered Carbon yet? It’s pretty good. See also: Best note taking apps Best productivity apps Make a list of all the things you’re proud of having accomplished by your age. Whatever you do, don’t go to the Museum of Conceptual Art “Things Other People Accomplished When They Were Your Age” page and enter your age. Don’t do it. Stop. Resist. Face crippling introspection Revisit the list you just made. What have you really done with your life? Are you really happy with where you are? Are you really in a better situation now than last year? How many days have you squandered? How many valuable relationships have you let slip away? What would have happened if you actually went in for that kiss when you were terrified to make the first move in high school? What did you want to be when you grew up? What are you doing now? Are you happy with your BMI? What about your credit score? Is your degree really worth the debt you’re in? When’s the last time you remember not being stressed out of your mind? See also: National Institute of Mental Health: Depression Overview Crippling Alcoholism Subreddit Borrow a friend’s phone Remember, not all networks are created equal. If you have friends, some of their phones might still work even if yours is currently offline. If the situation becomes too dire, don’t forget that even heroes ask for help from time to time. Get your mobile fix by asking to borrow your buddy’s device. If you don’t have any friends, refer back to our entry about strangers. In Summary There you have it! Now you’ll never have to worry about what to do when your phone is offline ever again. If you’re feeling particularly canny, go ahead and download this article so you can access it even when you’re offline. If you know someone currently suffering from an offline phone, share this with them. They won’t see it, of course, but it’s the thought that counts. Share this with a friend who is frequently offline. They won't see it, but it's the thought that counts These are our favorites, but we’d love to hear from you too! What do you do when your phone is offline? Give us your best in the comments! , via Android Authority http://bit.ly/2mBKtbf

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movietvtechgeeks · 8 years ago

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Latest story from https://movietvtechgeeks.com/ten-superheroes-definitive-actors/

Ten Superheroes and Their Definitive Actors

We all have our favorite superheroes that have appeared on both TV and cinema and asked if they were real, we’d identify them with a face, and it would be that of the actor that portrayed them. For some of us who have lived longer than others, we’d probably think of faces the current generation doesn’t know of so this list will be limited to our heroes’ cinematic outings. But even then an entry or two would be from an older era. These roles have made or broken some actors but what matters is, that they brought the role to life and we couldn’t think of anyone else more suited. If only they didn’t age, right? Superman – Richard Donner’s Superman starring Christopher Reeve was a groundbreaking superhero film. The choice of Christopher Reeve as Superman was perfect. Reeve had the looks and the build to support the role. He wore the bright, red, blue and yellow costume without looking silly even by today’s standards. He also had a certain charm and charisma that embodied DC’s flagship hero. And though several actors have played the role on film and TV, many people still identify the late Christopher Reeve as the definitive Superman. Wonder Woman – the character had been waiting for so long for a cinematic outing. Whether Warner Brothers and DC were afraid a female-led film wouldn’t work, or Batman just makes a lot more money. But the world was greeted with surprise when Wonder Woman, starring Gal Gadot turned out to be such a great film. It’s now being compared to Richard Donner’s Superman film, and Gal Gadot is now being billed as the definitive Wonder Woman. Though she first appeared in Batman V Superman, the film’s reception has been disappointing that Gal Gadot’s appearance became muted but many agree that it was one of the best parts of the film. The DC Trinity is finally complete in cinematic form, and hopefully, she’s handled carefully in Justice League and in the Wonder Woman sequel to really cement Gal Gadot’s face to the character, replacing the lovely Lynda Carter who has as the face of the iconic female hero. Batman – Now this is a tough one. In deference to the recently departed Adam West, he just wasn’t well-known as the cinematic Batman even though the TV series had a cinematic special called Batman The Movie. Two actors actually fit the bill and there have been many since Batman was made into the superhero equivalent of James Bond surrounded by much hype as who will play the iconic hero as well as the villain of the year. Michael Keaton is credited into propelling the character to great heights in cinema thanks to director Tim Burton. Michael Keaton has brought the character out of darkness or rather back into it through the film simply titled Batman in 1989. Keaton played the role again in Batman Returns. The two subsequent films weren’t as well received as the first two and changing directors as well as lead actors aren’t well received back then as it is now. This franchise died taking the early superhero genre along with it in the disastrous Batman and Robin. Keaton had the seriousness it took despite doubts being a comedic actor. He had the looks and the build though Batman also popularized the rubber muscle trend. The quirky directing also worked plus the darker tone, the awesome costume and the awesome Batmobile and Batwing made this film very memorable, placing Keaton in an enviable role as the face of Batman. Though some fans would dispute this as the new Dark Knight Trilogy by Christopher Nolan, starring Christian Bale revitalized the popularity of the character in cinema. Not to mention Bale playing the character throughout the trilogy. The best film of the trilogy, The Dark Knight, was well received, thanks to a great plot, direction and acting with an awesome performance by the late Heath Ledger as the Joker who might as well have taken over Jack Nicholson as the face of Batman’s best villain. Iron Man – It’s very difficult to think of anyone else playing Iron Man than Robert Downey Jr. You could say that he was born for the role; and like Hugh Jackman as Wolverine, he has been playing the role since forever or more than a decade since the MCU franchise began. RDJ has the looks, RDJ has the build and RDJ has the snark of the character to a T. Robert Downey Jr. also shares some of the character’s own personal battles with alcoholism and thanks to the Iron Man film last 2008, RDJ’s career is at an all-time high. He has the majority of the MCU films under his belt, so it will be difficult to forget him as the definitive Iron Man. Spider-Man – This is another tough one, but there’s still no doubt that the majority still identifies Tobey McGuire as Spider-Man. McGuire has three films under his belt, and two of them were spectacular (pun intended). Spider-Man 3 is seen as a troubled sibling, but it’s not that bad. Some critics say though that Director Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man trilogy was too dramatic. What we have to remember though is that Marvel’s heroes are often thrust with real-world problems much like everyone else. They have to deal with problems regarding nerdity, love, responsibilities, and finances all of which are depicted nicely in the films. Tobey may now be memed for his role, but those serve to remind us that he’s still Spider-Man and not the other guy with the weird hair. Whether we’ll be singing a different tune after Spider-Man: Homecoming remains to be seen as Tom Holland seemed to have a handle on Spider-Man in the few minutes he was in Captain America: Civil War. Personally, Marisa Tomei nails it as the face of Aunt May but Rosemary Harris nails it too if we stick through the comics and the Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends cartoon. Captain America – Captain America has been around for a long, long time like Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman. But unlike Wonder Woman, he had several cinematic outings before Captain America: The First Avenger. First, there was Matt Salinger in that lackluster 90s film, and there were those TV movies starring Reb Brown, but they were forgettable, low-budget and lackluster not to mention strayed too far from the source material. Actor Chris Evans certainly has the looks and the build to star as the Star-Spangled Man with a Plan. He also has the talent as he delivers his archaic period lines and attitude on the big screen. To further emphasize, Evans might as well be the face of the Human Torch as he played the Fantastic Four’s rambunctious Johnny Storm quite well. Seriously, these guys and the talk about their contracts. They need to be cloned. Wolverine – Hugh Jackman would probably be stuck down under as a great actor in that part of the world if it wasn’t for Ol’ Canucklehead. Hugh Jackman isn’t exactly well known for his other films, Pan being the worst. And imagine if Bob Hoskins got the role because Wolverine calls for a short, stocky guy? Lucky for us, Jackman got the part, and the height thing was thrown out the window. Unfortunately, Logan is the last we’ll see of him as Wolverine and Logan, being a great film compared to the other X-titles, is a great way of coming out on top. Professor X – speaking of another hero we won’t be seeing again; Patrick Stewart has also called it quits after Logan. His role in the film was perhaps his greatest and most effing tragic. We’ve known him as Professor X from the beginning of the film franchise and upon knowing there was going to be an X-Men film, the first person fans may have thought of is Patrick Stewart. Yes, because he’s old and bald but he’s also a great actor. Debate still rages in the Trek world if he’s better at being captain of the Enterprise than William Shatner. Again, Patrick Stewart pulls off the looks quite nicely and delivers his lines effectively. The role of Professor X has now been passed on to James McAvoy, but for most of us, Professor Xavier’s cinematic face will be Patrick Stewart. Nick Fury – Samuel L. Jackson has influenced the character of Nick Fury even before he took the cinematic role. Sounds like a Chuck Norris meme but it’s true. Samuel L. Jackson was the face of Nick Fury in Marvel’s Ultimate universe. That’s how great his appeal is. That is the very reason he secured the role of Nick Fury in the Marvel Cinematic Universe since Iron Man 1. ‘Okay, you can use my mother$%#ng face, but I gotta be in your mother$%#ng films!’ He nails the role through sheer talent, and he doesn’t have to worry about his looks straying from the source material. He is the source material. What was that? The Hoff was first? The point is? Blade – Not many actually thought of Blade as a comic book superhero, but everyone knew that Wesley Snipes nailed the stake right through the heart, at least for the first two films. Good Lord, Trinity… Anyway, there hasn’t been any mention of Blade in other media apart from an appearance in the 90s Spider-Man cartoon. The first guy for the role is often the best especially if the film was great, just like Christopher Reeve and unlike Ben Affleck in Daredevil. Wesley Snipes was perfect for the film with his looks and his action cred. His acting is okay, but the film pulls through on his badass appearance and action alone. The Snipes look carries through the Blade anime TV series and recent comic books. Now Snipes may be the face of Blade, but is a reboot with him recast in the MCU a good idea? Honorable Mentions Deadpool – Ryan Reynolds had his chance at being the Green Lantern. It’s not that he blew it, there were other factors at play. But he did nail Deadpool, and he’s more attuned to his character due to his own method of acting. He also has the looks and build though his good looks need to be tinkered to look like an oversexed avocado. Ryan Reynolds is the only face for Deadpool right now, and we give it to him unless Fox screws up the next film. He’s actually been Deadpool twice with the first in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. He was great in the first act, and comic book fans immediately knew he was the Merc with a Mouth. The last act where they sewed that mouth shut was probably what killed the movie for a lot of fans. Hulk – There has already been five cinematic Hulks. Bill Bixby, Lou Ferrigno, Eric Bana, Edward Norton and Mark Ruffalo. We count Lou as he played the actual Hulk opposite Bill Bixby’s David Banner (yes, not Bruce). Bana and Norton played the character once, if we’re going to base this on number of appearances but Bill, Lou and Mark have played it several times already. Unfortunately, Bill and Lou don’t count as the film The Trial of the Incredible Hulk was made for TV. To be fair, Edward Norton had the better and full cinematic appearance as Bruce Banner than Mark Ruffalo’s Hulk has yet to star in a solo film. But Mark has been in the game since Avengers and is set to appear in Thor: Ragnarok and Avengers: Infinity War. Edward probably owns this one until Hulk is better defined in the upcoming films. What do you think?

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#Chris Evans #Christian Bale #Deadpool #Featured #Gal Gadot #Hugh Jackman #Ryan Reynolds #Wonder Woman

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