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plutoswritingplanet · 8 months ago

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It's A Special Death You Saved (Feyd Rautha x Female!Reader) pt.3

a/n: so i lied about this being the last chapter, there's one more, i know im sorry....... also shout out to my friends, who were unbelievably helpful with the smut part because oh, there's smut here

Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content (yuuuh yuuuuuuh), Alcohol, like....a tiny bit of Humiliation.

Summary: The month-long courting comes to an end with a bang! As your engagement party commences, wine flows and darker feelings rise to the surface

Pt. 1, Pt.2 Pt.4 (finale)

In the darkness of the night, he still comes to you in your dreams, knife in hand, body taunt and ready to strike. Every single morning, you awake with a gasp, as visions of your tormentor plague you. In some, he slits your throat, reveling in the way red cascades down your nightgown. Other times, it's a quick and brutal stabbing, your insides twisting as you wake.

But then, there are those rare nights where you rise from your bed, sweat clinging to your skin, as you fight with the pressure in your stomach, try to rid yourself of the images, before making yourself presentable for breakfast.

Those dreams, nightmares, are the worst.

White, elegant fingers, grabbing, pulling, pinching every surface of your exposed skin. Defined arms around you, squeezing your pliant body in an embrace that is as tender and romantic, as a snake suffocating its victim. Deceivingly soft lips, mapping a trail down your front, pulling back to reveal teeth, which make that same trail visible, hurting.

In those dreams, he paints you with black. Taints you, until you're molded into his perverse image, until there's no telling where he ends, and you begin. He makes you into a sculpture, in a way that an artist cuts away pieces of clay, slowly robbing you of all agency, until there's only what he wants to see. And you let him, with a trembling smile on your lips, hands twisted into the stained sheets of your bed.

Ignoring him has become an art form as well.

Since your faithful tangle at the training barracks, you did everything in your power, to never appear in the same room as him, or at least, never alone. You became a shadow in your own home, a whisper of the person you used to be. Shame is a powerful thing, and you wore it like a wedding veil over your face. Paul would always help you, silently. Never asking outright what had happened between you and the Harkonnen, but somehow always knowing. Your brother, your salvation, breaks your heart everytime he grabs your hand, and leads you away from the predator in the room.

The date of your engagement party has been set a week into the future. The nervous bustling of the court only heightening your already wracked thoughts, as the inevitability of your situation begins to haul you to the ground.

Your Mother took most of the preparations on her back, directing the servants, the kitchen, the musicians. She picked out a dress for you, some flowing abomination, which hung in your closet, reminding you every morning, that you will have to wear it with a smile. You hoped, there will be wine at the feast, hope that it will be sweet enough to dull your insides.

As the date of the feast comes closer and closer, you begin to spend more time outside.

The air is crisp and smells of seawater, and you can't help but inhale fully, every time. You want it seared into your brain, so whenever you're taken away from your home, you can run back to this memory, to the feel of grass under your fingers.

- You'll catch a cold, if you keep sitting here.

Paul's voice brings you back from your dark thoughts, and you look up, from your spot in the grass. He stands a couple paces back, hands folded behind his back in a manner, that is reminding you of your Father more and more every day.

- Do you want to join me? - you ask, your lips quirking up into a small smile - Or would you prefer to stand there like a pillar of salt?

Your brother shakes his head, before coming closer and plopping down next to you, his skinny legs stretched out in front of him. The both of you sit in silence for a while, enjoying the breeze ruffling your hair, the smell of ocean and the waves crashing into the cliffs. There are seagulls flying over your heads, and you feel the moisture from the grass seep into your clothing.

A wistful sigh escapes you, before you can stop it, and you let yourself fall, laying flat on the hill.

Paul looks down at you, undescribable sadness swimming in his eyes, and an instinct of sister awakes in you, a need to comfort, despite being a wreck yourself. So, you offer him a smile, a tired one, but a smile nonetheless.

- Do you think we could take the horses for a ride today? - your brother asks with naive hope, his eyes turning to the sea.

- Mother won't allow me to go, she wants me to spend my pondering the proper behavior during the feast - try as you might, you can't hide the bitterness in your voice - Besides, I could fall off and hurt the merchandising.

Paul's hand finds yours, and he squeezes your fingers tightly. It's hard not to break, in moments like these. When you're forced to remember, you'll most likely never see your family again.

- If I could do something, anything... - you recognize that feverish note in your brother's voice, it's devoid of reason, impulsive, too much like you.

- But you can't, so you won't.

A frustrated sound escapes his mouth, and he turns back to the sea. You watch him through half-lidded eyes, eyelashes falling heavily on your cheeks. He looks like a Duke, you conclude, and that thought feels strangely comforting. No matter where you'll be shipped off, no matter what life has in store for you in the future, somehow, you know your brother will persevere.

- Do you remember that time Gurney made us train on the beach? - you ask, a sudden wave of nostalgia washing over you, as the clouds float in the sky above you - Cause of the... The balance. We had to try to balance in the sand.

Paul twists his head towards you, surprised at the turn of the conversation, before cracking a smile.

- Yes, he slipped on the rocks, nearly broke his backbone - he starts to wave his hands around in a wonderful reenactment of your mentor's fall, before collapsing next to you in the grass.

Your laughter mingles with the sounds of the sea, as the both of you, the future of House Atriedes, share memories, scenes from the life you've lived together. The good and the bad. The horse races through plains and hills of Caladan, the many, many food fights. It's hard to tell, how much time you spend together, laying in the grass, but when you finally fall into silence, the air has become considerably more chilly. A sign, it's time to return to reality, to your duties.

- You should've been me, and I you - Paul whispers suddenly, and you close your eyes in a pained expression.

Perhaps it's true. Perhaps Lady Jessica made a mistake, and gave a Daughter where she should've given a Son. Now, it's no longer important. Your roles have been set in place, all you could do, is fulfill them. Somewhere back, in the direction of the Palace you can hear a voice calling your names. A reminder, that the world outside this grassy sanctuary exists, and can't wait any longer.

You move to stand, Paul gathering himself up closely behind. Your clothes stick to your body, and you're shivering from the cold, but if you could spend just one more moment exactly like that, you would've taken that chance without question.

An arm snakes around your elbow, and you lean onto your brother's shoulder, as you start to walk back, steps swaying like a pair of drunkards. Then, Paul tugs you closer, you can feel him tense suddenly, as he leans with a sullen expression on his pale face.

- I hate the way he looks at you - he confesses, waves upon waves of righteous Atriedes fury crashing in his voice.

You don't know how to respond to that, so you stay silent, giving his arm a reassuring tug.

That was the last conversation you've had with your brother.

*** While the House Atriedes is characterized by a rather mellow temper, there was one thing they took extremely seriously. And those, unfortunately for you, were engagement rituals.

So, that's why you sit posed like a porcelain doll in a deep chair, next to your soon-to-be husband, at the foot of a long table, surrounded by music, and dancing, and food. There are ribbons hung from the high ceilings, and flickering lights float around them like little fireflies. You watch, as they dance above you, the ridiculous headdress placed on your hair digs into your skul. Color surrounds you, your own dress flowing like a waterfall, elegant, yet delicate. The pools of fabric gather around your legs, a chiffon monstrosity, that you know, is supposed to make you beautiful.

And perhaps you would've felt beautiful, if this was any other occasion. A birthday feast, perhaps. Dare you say, and engagement party with someone you actually loved.

Speaking of which, your betrothed sits beside you, sticking out like a sore thumb. He looks utterly bored, eyes following the celebrating masses, hand playing with a steak knife. Not enough blood for his tastes, you suppose. He's dressed in traditional Harkonnen attire, which you think, doesn't really look that much different from all the other outfits you've seen him in. Black, sleek, efficient. You must be a curious pair, a mass of colorful materials and a black-stone pillar.

The wine, thankfully, is sweet. It warms your face, and turns your insides into a pleasant mush. You should've eaten more, but then again, it was a celebration of your imprisonment, and if you wanted to get drunk, you would. And you did get drunk. Quickly.

The dress moves with you, as you slowly slide down the chair, one leg resting up on the seat. A frightfully unbecoming sight, but you can't find it in yourself to care. Another, clumsy drink from your cup, and you sigh deeply, blinking a couple of times to rid yourself of sudden dizziness.

Your betrothed gives you a look, whether it's of warning or amusement, you're not sure. And you don't care. Your nose scrunches in the general direction of his smooth head, and you take another sip, just to spite him.

- Shut up - you grumble, a slurr entering your words.

- I haven't said a word - he counters, and this time you can see him smile.

- You're thinking, it's annoying.

Feyd Rautha has an unpleasant laugh.

Sharp and low, and very rough around the edges. It's like listening to an old spaceship try to take off, and you're sure you don't want to hear him laugh ever again. That's it, your goal in this, frankly, fucked up marriage, will be to never make your husband laugh. Although, it's best not to think about it so loudly, he might be a hidden mind reader, and would most likely laugh in your face every day, just to torture you.

God. You were going to regret every sip come tomorrow morning.

- You're wrapped like a present - Feyd Rautha leans down with a smirk playing on his full lips, and you have to crane your neck to look him straight in the face - Shall I unwrap you here, while your family watches?

Despite the light tone, you shiver under his gaze. Something in the way his body seems relaxed yet tense at the same time tells you, this shameless man would do it in a heartbeat, if you as much as inclined your head.

- Gross - you groan, hand untangling itself from the amassing of chiffon to push back at his face.

It's the first time, you've touched him out of your own volition, and even in your drunken daze, you note the sudden glint in his eyes. Fingers grab at your wrist, keeping you in place, as he leans further into your touch, turning his head slightly. Wine mixes with sudden embarrassment, as his lips brush against the meat of your palm. Then, black teeth shine and your heart jumps to your throat, as he bites down on your skin, hard enough to make you jump. Tongue darts out, licking a stripe up your thumb, before giving your fingertip a tiny nibble.

You tear your hand away from him, pressing it into your chest with an appalled expression. There are indents just below your thumb in the shape of his teeth, and the confounding feelings you've been trying to stoke for almost a month now, come crashing down upon you.

He looks satisfied with himself, returning back to his seat, and his steak knife. The utensil reflects the flowing lights, and despite yourself you swallow thickly, turning back to your cup, which is quickly becoming empty.

God, it was getting incessantly hot in this cursed dining hall.

Whether it was the wine, or the sudden wave of knee-bending arousal washing through you, you couldn't tell. (It was both, you were fully aware it was both) And you're uncomfortable, terribly so. You fidget in your seat, almost painfully aware of the heat, which has now spread further down. The fabric of the dress slides against your body, skin becoming far too sensitive, too hungry for touch. You try to relieve some of your torment, legs squeezing and rubbing together. Treacherous tongues of self-awareness rear its ugly heads, and you look up, and...

Of course he noticed.

Feyd Rautha places his chin in his hand, and he observes you with a knowing look, which turns dark and terrifying as soon as your eyes meet.

- Careful, lest the court starts talking - he warns you, his voice somehow becoming deeper than before, and you take a shuddering breath.

Dagnerous, this is dangerous.

You're seated far away from your family, from any consolation, and even if they were close enough to intervene, the masses of dancing people, the sound of their laughter... Your heart stops, a snake curling itself around your insides. Truly, if that beast of a man wanted to, he could make do of his threat from earlier, and take you where you sit. Haunted by that thought, both terrifying and arousing, you down the rest of your wine.

It doesn't taste as good anymore. Hell, it threatens to come back up, until you force it to sit in your stomach.

Duncan, you need to find Duncan, or you'll do something incredibly stupid. You'll do something incredibly stupid either way, but at least the regret will be less biting. So, pulling yourself up on trembling arms, you shuffle out of your chair, your betrothed's heated gaze following you on your way through the hall.

People don't even look at you, too enraptured with free food and drinks, and the music, which flows loudly through the air. Good, in any other case, the Duke's Daughter, stumbling drunk through corridors, would certainly lift some eyebrows. Your feet carry you towards the training barracks, a familiar route you've followed many times. Indulging in sex with your Father's most trusted advisor was not the healthiest form of regulating emotions, but you needed something, and God knows, you'd rather die than get it from anyone else. From Him especially.

The choice is made for you, however, as a strong hand wraps itself around your arm, just above your elbow, yanking you backwards, behind a stone column. The world spins in front of your eyes, and for a second you worry the company of wine warming your insides is about to abandon you along with breakfast.

- Do you truly thought, you could sneak away from me?

Finally, your eyes focus on Fey Rautha's face, almost demonic in the low light of the corridor. Shadows play on his expression, falling heavily over his eyes, and you try to wrench yourself from his grasp.

- What I do is none of your business - you slurr out, wringing your arm every which way, his fingers digging painfully into your flesh - Let go of me.

The Harkonnen presses himself closer to you, trapping your body between the stone and himself. His nose nearly crushes itself into the juncture between your neck and your shoulder, taking a disturbing long whiff. You can feel his chest vibrate against your own, as he groans deep within his throat. It sobers you up in record speed, and you start to thrash in his hold. He subdues your outburst, as if he was made for it, before dragging his nose up, towards your hair. You snarl like a wild animal.

- Let me go.

His body moves on its own accord, tearing itself away from you in an instant, legs tripping over themselves, to put distance between your bodies. He looks up at you, muscles tense and an expression of shock painted across his pale face.

The ability to use the Voice was something you rarely took part in. Training sessions with your Mother went well, as expected of a woman, but you still had a lot of work ahead of you. You blink forcefully, steadying yourself against the wall behind you. Then, you notice the borderline murderous look on your soon-to-be husband's face.

- Witch - he spits out, baring his blackened teeth at you.

- I am the Daughter of Duke Atriedes - your voice carries a note of righteous pride, despite dread climbing up your spine - And you will treat me with respect, wedded or not.

He straightens himself with petrifying speed, and as he takes a step towards you, actions overtake reflection. Your hand winds back, and you bring a resounding slap across his sharp cheekbone. While your palm blooms with pain, he seems to barely react, closing the distance between the two of you after a tense beat. Before you have a chance to react again, his hands grab at your face, and his lips crash against yours in a punishing kiss.

Teeth clink together and the momentum of the kiss makes your head collide with the stone pillar behind you. He's fingers dig into your cheeks and your jaw, as he devours you completely, bringing down all your defences in one swoop. You kiss him back, almost immediately, opening your mouth to let him in, to meet his tongue halfway. It's almost grotesque, how much you hate and love this at the same time, the buzzing of the wine mixing with the sound of your racing heart, with the sound of his unabashed sounds of pleasure.

Hands flail at your sides, as you grab all you can take, pulling him even closer by the thick fabric of his tunic.

His hands however, know exactly what they want, and as he lets go of your face, they both sink down. Fingers hook into the neckline of your dress, and he tears it down, your entire body swaying with the force of his movement. Your breasts are freed for only just a moment, cold air hitting them in a way that would be uncomfortable, if they weren't immediately covered by your betrothed's large palm. He palms at your chest, as if he wants to crush it, and you bite back a whine, which threatens to spill from your abused lips.

- Don't - he growls a warning, unoccupied hand tangling itself within your hair - Sing.

And you do. As his mouth descends upon your neglected breast, where he alternates between licks and bites that make your back fly off the wall. Once again you don't know what to do with your hands, finding them entirely useless in the Harkonnen's overpowering grasp. One, grabs at his shoulder, undecided on whether to push him off, or pull him in closer. The other one scratches four lines into his skull, as he sucks on the sensitive skin under your ribs.

Finally, he detaches from you completely, standing straight and regarding you with a look so intensely ravenous, it shakes you to your core. Your exposed chest rises and falls in tandem with your heaving breaths, and you shiver, as cold air hits your skin. His gaze drinks in your dissheveled hair, the way your lips are puffy and red. A beautiful sight for his blackened eyes.

- I know who you went looking for - he starts, stalking towards you once again - Can't have that, can I?

You debate feigning confusion, outrage at such accusation, which hasn't really been uttered yet. But, as Feyd Rautha stops just short of the bottom hem of your dress, you suddenly find yourself unable to speak. Instead, as a last ditched effort to rid yourself of him, your hand extends, a half-hazard attempt at liberation. He swats it away, as one would a mere fly, before sinking to his knees in front of you.

- Lift up your dress, Viper - his voice is like thunder in your ears, and you bite your lips at the sight of his eyes, dark and surprisingly eager.

Hands move clumsily in an effort to gather all those translucent layers. You nearly trip over yourself, earning a rather nasty chuckle from below. As soon, as your legs are visible, he dives between the chiffon, his head dissapearing from sight. You can feel his lips, traveling up the expanse of your calf, giving a light bite under your knee.

Anticipation siezes your gut, and you grab onto the wall, as if that would save you. His hands grab your leg, skin incredibly warm to the touch for someone who looks so cold, and then, with forceful tugs, he starts to manouver you.

You let out an unbecoming squeak, as he yanks your leg over his shoulder. Strong hands keep you in place, and he reaches out around the upper part of your thigh to all but tear your undergarments off of your core. The force of this action makes you jump in place on your one available leg, just to hold your balance, and for a second you consider swatting at him.

That thought leaves you almost immediately after it appears, as an onslaugh of kitten licks unleashes downward. A vague, head like shape moves under your dress, the chiffon floating from place to place like a hypnotizing river. The wine must've heightened your senses to an alarming degree, because as soon as Feyd Rautha begins his ministrations, you're a mess.

It's honestly humiliating, the way you fight for any purchase on the wall behind you, as he begins to lick in earnes, parting your legs further with one hand, while the other wraps securely around your used leg. While there, he cops a feel of your behind, fingers biting into the soft flesh, and you lock your lower lip between your teeth so hard, you can taste blood on your tongue.

As if he's developed some new telepathic talents, his hand leaves your ass, in favor of winding up, and slapping it harshly. The action makes your jump in place once again, a sound stuck between outrage and glee fleeing your throat, before you have the chance to stop it. Right, "sing", you remind yourself, and immediately feel him change his tactics.

Your bundle of nerves opens new possibilities of torment, and as his lips close around the bud, you can't help the whine, escaping through your lips. The music is loud, you remind yourself. They won't hear, no one will hear. His hand pushes your dangling leg further up your shoulder, and your back arches from the stone. You will be sore as all hell after this is done, but for now, it doesn't matter. Nothing really matters, except the way your betrothed eats you out, like a man who's been starved for decades.

- Oh shit - you curse, hands flailing uselessly - Oh fuck!

All of a sudden, everything stops, and your building peak subsides into a dissatisfactory simmer. Feyd Rautha's head emerges from under the fabric, a terrible, shit-eating grin on his wet lips.

- Such language? - he teases, tongue darting out to lap at your arousal - So unbecoming of a-...

- Fucking don't stop! - there's panic in your movements, as you grab the back of his head, and shove him right under your dress again.

The laughter should be unsettling for you, but he returns to his post with twice as much motivation, and however more strength, and before you know it, your orgasm sneaks upon you. A sudden tightness in your core is all the warning you get, before the coil snaps, and your entire body starts to spasm in pleasure.

It's good. Incredibly so. You'd risk saying it's the most intense you've ever came, but never out loud, never to him. That shameful secret was between you and whatever God that was listening. Stars erupt behind your eyelids, your breathing stopping for just a moment.

And then you go deliciously limp, legs giving out completely.

To his credit, the Harkonnen catches you before you hit the floor, the arm curling around your leg proving to be an unmeasurable support. His head emerges from under the dress once again, and he lets you slide down the wall, until you're seated. He sways on the balls of his feet, still towering you, even as he crouches.

You swallow, throat slightly raw from all the noise you've done moments ago, and he follows the movements of your neck muscles with greedy eyes. Still greedy, after taking so much. Truly, he was a Harkonnen. And before you can stop yourself, a thought materializes in your brain, a treacherous little information, which would shake you to the core, if your muscles weren't currently made of taffy.

He blushes pink. Your betrothed blushes pink, from the exercise of making you cum on his tongue alone. God, what a precious sight.

He must've noticed the serene smile playing upon your lips, and his nature to ruin comes to light. His hand reaches back, and you freeze in your spot, as you recognize that damned golden steak knife. The blade shines in the dimly lit corridor, making your breathing faster, questions swimming behind your eyes. You don't really want to fight him in this state, but you fucking will, if he tries anything.

- An engagement present, for you, Viper. - he rasps, licking his reddened lips in an obscene display, which doesn't repulse you quite as much as it should.

- I have nothing to give in return - your voice is stern, and your betrothed flashes you an evil grin.

Then, he presents you the tip of the knife, golden utensil hanging between his slender fingers, and you look up at him, not understanding what is expected of you. Placing one knee on the floor, Feyd Rautha lowers himself to your eye level, for the hundredth of times surprising you with the sheer grace in his movements.

- Kiss - he whispers, into the space between the both of you.

Your eyes fall to the knife, then, to him and you take a long, deep breath. Pride, your biggest flaw, takes a deadly hit, as the man twists the knife in his fingers, looking at you expectedly. You hate him, truly and deeply, and it must be showing on your face, because he sucks in a sharp breath through his teeth, as soon as your eyes meet.

Swallowing your pride, you keep his gaze, leaning towards the blade. Your lips press delicately against the cool metal and the Harkonnen flashes you a nasty, self-satisfied smirk, before slipping the knife up his sleeve and standing up.

- I'll see you back at the feast - he gives you a small bow, and you press your lips tightly together.

- Fuck you.

- After the wedding, my Viper.

And with that, he turns around.

You're left there, on the floor, your dignity in shambles, the exertion catching up to you all at once, as if his presence alone was the only thing keeping you from feeling pain. A stupid thought, you chastize yourself, before slowly pulling yourself from the cold tiles.

It takes you a couple of shameful minutes, trying to put yourself back together again. The ridiculous headdress, which has slipped all the way down from your hair, will probably never look the same, as when your Mother has styled it, but you can't find it in yourself to care.

The music still plays, as you enter the hall, and thankfully, no one notices your arrival. No one but your betrothed, who raises his drinking cup in your direction, as if nothing had happened. His face is annoying, you conclude, and turn away, your aching legs taking you towards the center of the room, where people danced and sang in celebration of your engagement. What a lovely sight, what a lovely couple. Opposites attract, right?

Bitter, aching and humiliated, you throw yourself into the crowd, let it sway you from place to place, as you dance away this whole wretched week. The whole month-long courting rituals, which were just a bullshit attempt at torture.

It's said, that when Death comes to take your soul, you're allowed one more dance before the eternal void.

So you dance.

#my writing #dune part 2 #dune x reader #feyd rautha harkonnen #feyd rautha smut #feyd rautha x reader #feyd rautha x you #tennis ball strikes again #i would also like to thank tiktok editing community for giving me material to daydream about #im seeing this movie again on thursday totally not because i want to write the most accurate smut in the next chapter

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moonstruckme · 5 months ago

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Haloooo!!! I wanted to request something but I jus wanna say how much i adore your workkksss😭 not to shade other writers but youre probably my fave out of them, theres just something about your writings thats so comforting and I love it!! Can I request a academic rival trope for Remus and reader??🥹 Im excited to read it!! Thank you!!🫶

I'm so glad you enjoy them my love!! Thank you for requesting <3

cw: mention of skipping meals (never fear it is remedied)

Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 1k words

Remus is the only other person in the library. You’ve been hopelessly aware of him since he’d sat down four tables away from you an hour ago, and you’re positive he’s being distracting on purpose, because no one really eats chocolate like that.

It’s abominable and should be punishable by death, honestly, the way he’s getting brown smudges all over the pages of his book. He’ll pop a chocolate in his mouth, let it get all melty in there, then slowly suck the remnants off each of his fingers, the movement distracted and tantalizing. Brow furrowed and eyes sharp, he looks entirely absorbed by his studies.

You wish you could say the same.

You’ve read the same page four times now, and the information keeps bouncing off your brain like someone’s put an invisible shield around it. Your eyes burn slightly, your back aches from too long spent in this wooden chair, but you need to know this stuff by tomorrow. Somehow, you need to make yourself retain it.

“Do you mind?”

You stop tapping the end of your pencil on the table, looking over at Remus. Your eyes narrow on instinct.

“Do you?”

He raises a brow. “I’m not doing anything.”

“Yes, you are. You keep smacking your lips, it’s irritating.” It’s not, really, it’s…it’s something else. It’s not conducive to a distraction-free study environment, that’s what it is. “Are you even allowed to have those in here?”

Remus sighs heavily. “Alright.”

Before you can figure out what he means by that, he’s pushing back his chair, walking over to join you at your table. He holds your gaze as he sits down and then pushes his chocolates towards you, seemingly expectant.

“What are you doing?”

“You’re clearly jealous. Go on, have a few.”

“I am not jealous.” You glare at him, arms folding over your book. It’s a habit, to hide the answers from him, but when you notice his gaze drop to the protective motion you feel silly. “And I’m not eating those. You’ve been licking your fingers and reaching in there, it’s gross.”

“Oh.” Remus retreats slightly, cheeks pinkening. “I didn’t realize I was, sorry.”

It’s gratifying to see him embarrassed. He’s the shyest of his group of friends (which is to say, he won’t automatically go and talk the ear off anyone within ten yards of him), but he goes about his day with their same unshakeable confidence, earned by social status and, admittedly, an intimidating academic prowess. Though you’ve always met each other head on in class, you’ve never felt up to par with him in any other respect. It’s nice to feel on a similar playing field. A bit endearing to see this tentative, boyish side to him, too.

It doesn’t last long enough.

There’s the barest shift in his expression, but you note with dread that familiar twinkle in Remus’ eyes. “Seems like you’ve been paying more attention to me than your book, hm?”

Yup, the endearment is gone.

“I’m basically done studying for the night anyway,” you lie through your teeth. “I was just finishing up.”

Remus’ brow lifts. He clearly doesn’t believe you. “Good for you. How long have you been here?”

“Since five.” It’s the truth this time, and you say it proudly. You want to show him that you work harder than him, are better, but your smugness fizzles out when he frowns.

“That long?” Remus asks, looking less defeated and more…troubled. “You must be exhausted. I was only going to put a couple of hours in.”

It nettles you, the implication that he can do better than you by studying half the time. You shrug with feigned insouciance. “I guess we’ll see who does better tomorrow.”

“Did you miss dinner?” He breezes right by the challenge, leaning forward as his brows come down. “You must have taken a break then.”

You cross your arms, appraising him as he does you. What is he playing at?

“I don’t take breaks, Remus.” I work hard. I play to win.

Remus hums, eyes still on you. It’s a struggle not to squirm under his gaze. After a minute, he sighs.

“Okay,” he says, starting to pack up his things. He puts his chocolates back in his bag. “I would offer you some of these, but you’ve made your thoughts about that known. I guess all that’s left is to go to the kitchens.”

You look up at him as he stands. “What are you talking about?”

“You can’t just not eat before the exam, love. It wouldn’t be fair.”

“To who?”

“To either of us. You need to do well, and I need to know you can do well so that I do well.” He leans against the table, a soft curve to his bottom lip. Like you’re friends. “Come on, grab your things.”

“I can’t just—” You shake your head incredulously. “I still have to study.”

“I thought you were done studying.”

“I—not—not all the way done,” you hedge, cheeks warming. Remus smiles like you’re funny.

“Let’s be done for tonight,” he says in a gentle tone. It’s not so different from his usual voice, and yet the sound of it caresses your nerves, lulling them to rest. “There’ll be time before the exam tomorrow. You’ve put in plenty of hours already, and those won’t do you any good without food and sleep.”

You bite the inside of your lip, considering this. Though you’ve tried to ignore it, you are tired. The bone-deep, heavy kind, from a week of exams that have left you nearly in tatters. You’re afraid that if you take to your bed now, getting out again may seem more trouble than it’s worth.

“And,” Remus adds offhandedly, “if beating my score is your goal, I like your odds. You’ve been studying all night, and I hardly opened my book a half hour ago.”

You blink up at him. Remus seems to realize you’re not going to start packing up yourself and, with a long-suffering sigh, begins doing it for you. “Why aren’t you staying to study?” you ask.

He shrugs. “I don’t mind going to the kitchens with you. And would you really go if I stayed here and studied?”

“No,” you answer honestly.

He gives you a wry, knowing look. “Then I suppose it’s a small price to pay.”

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vssail · 7 months ago

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sunday x reader

warnings: very short, use of affectionate nicknames, kinda hurting sundays feelings, mention of possible future little sundays¿

sunday shows photos of him and robin as babies to his lover

english is not my first language! also im writing this at like 2am without translator so this could be a disaster.

Sunday was so excited to show you those pictures that meant a lot of him. Sharing his childhood, his story to you meant a big step on your relationship, especially because he really wanted to have a family with you. He hears someone open the door of his office and turns around to see you.

"Ah, there you are, my sweet dove" He says, approaching to you and taking your hand. "I have something very dear to me to show you"

Gently, he pulled you to his desk, where the photo album was laying.

"Those are mine and Robin's childhood memories. I want you to see all of me, so please take a look" A sweet smile was adorning his face while he urged you to open the book.

Excited to see your lover as a cute baby, you hurried to do what he told you, only to be greeted with the most horrible thing you had ever witnessed in your life.

"This was me as a newborn" he explained. "I like to imagine that our kids will be this cute even as newborns"

There was no need for explanation. Your breathing was cut off of the tiny bare wings on his little head. Also, baby Sunday's face was something you would never be able to remove of your mind.

You tried your best to hide the emotions you were feeling about the picture and turned page, hoping to see a more grown Sunday (at least with feathers on his wings). Sadly, you again were greeted with another aberration of nature.

"This was my dear sister as a newborn, wasn't she adorable?" He asked you with the most innocent and naive intentions.

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you agreed with his statement, and turned page. You were feeling like the worst person in humanity for disliking your dear boyfriend's baby pictures but god, you never expected to see something like that. How could the most handsome man in Penacony be such an abomination as a baby?

Fortunately, the next pictures were normal (the wings had feathers). There was one that you really liked, where Sunday was his sister's audience for a "concert". It was so cute that it almost made you forget the newborn pictures you had the misfortune to see before. But those pictures would never leave your memory.

When you finished seeing the entire album, you stood up and after giving a little kiss to your lover, you got out of the room.

Right after you left, Robin came in.

"How did it go?" she asked, kind of knowing what the response could be.

"I don't think we'll ever be parents after this"

im sorry but i had to

#sunday x reader #sunday hsr #sunday honkai star rail #hsr x reader #no beta read

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funtheysaid · 6 months ago

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IWTV 2x01 Initial Thoughts (Stream Of Consciousness)

- That title card for Delainey felt very stage play to me (ahhh I adore the theatrical elements for this season)

- Ooh I love the idea that vamps can take on the emotions of whosever blood they’re drinking - it’s like the vampire equivalent of when werewolves can smell ppl’s emotions and fears through chemosignals (a la Teen Wolf iykyk)

- “Disregard” is the funniest shit ever 😂 Oldmaniel they could never make me hate you

- There’s a Real Rashid OMFG ??? Lol imagine he’s not actually Rashid and they pull one over on us again I’d fucking shit myself

- “Your love was in a box” OH MY GOD EAT HIM UP DANNY BOY

- OMG OMG LOUSTAT ITS HAPPENIGN ITS HAPPENING EVERYONE SHUT UP

- I MISS YOU TOO LESTAT

- “Quite fucked” 😏😏😏

- “mon amour” “mon cher” “love” IM GOING TO EXSANGUINATE MYSELF ISTG

- The singular finger on Louis’ chin 🥲 so delicate so soft so bad for my mental health

- I like Emilia

- “They are not used to seeing man with good looks” OKAY I know they’re just racists BUT she also wasn’t lying bc beautiful Louis is canon god bless you Jacob Anderson

- Lol Morgan a little fruity

- OOH memory is a monster! They be redoing scenes as Louis “fixes” his memories !!!! That’s gonna show up again for sure :))))

- “Stupid Halloween costume” Daniel Molloy the brat that you are (is okay, Armand likes brats) *cough cough*

- I’ve never seen someone *elegantly* close an iPad before. Armand, you have bewitched me.

- The fucking sexual tension between DM is stifling 🥵😶‍🌫️ Um if this is us “not getting Devil’s Minion” then I think imma be okay

- Claudia pushing the little racist boy 🤪🥹 we can’t help but to stan

- WTF AMC you can’t just jumpscare me with a Grace photograph :’)))

- “UP YOUR BUM” EXCUSE ME MORGAN I KNEW YOU WERE FRUITY BUT SIRRRR?

- so the makeup department really put their whole sfxussies into that decrepit ass abomination

- Louis: Alexa, play Mr. Steal Your Girl by Trey Songz

- Claudia calling Louis Daddy in S1: ☺️🍭👼 Claudia calling Louis Daddy in S2: 😖🤢😟

- I’m dubbing Louis “The Rat Prince”

- “If he can’t take you ballroom dancing and call you pretty” ICONIC.

- “the motherfucker” it’s on sight Bruce or Killer or whatever the fuck your name was 🤕🥊

- “her hand twitched like yours would” why was that line lowkey out of pocket. My mans has Parkinson’s Louis !!!!

- SHE DREAMS 😭 MY FUCKING GOD STOP MY EYES ARE GONNA BE PUFFY WHEN I WAKE UP TOMORROW

- that wasn’t even acting that was some REAL shit. Get Jacob Anderson his Emmy or Oscar or Tony or whatever the fuck I just need him to be awarded for his talent

- Daniel’s soft compassionate side: rare but that much more meaningful when it makes an appearance

- LOUIS you did not just do Emilia dirty like that TF!?! She helped you dude.

- “Human affairs. Their problem.” Not you listening to Lestat now of all times

- “Catfish with teeth” Louis can really read a bitch to filth can’t he?

- AHHH THERE ARE TWO OF THE FUCKERS 👹👹

- Oh shit he’s a kid okay I’m sorry for calling you an abomination earlier. That was mean.

- Woman vampire, you standing precariously close to that fire 👀

- Delainey’s facial expressions are the perfect blend of innocent and slightly unsettling

- OPP INTO THE FIRE SHE GOES rip 🔥

- What the hell is a bacon triptych am I just stupid don’t answer that

- Armand you ain’t beating the iPad kid allegations

- “It’s his drug” He said that with such malice. Is this a “he needed me but he needed drugs more” plot line???

- So Dubai Loumand is chilly frigid tepid frosty glacial

- Free feet? Okay im sorry

- “We can have him saying what happened next in no time” okay wait hold up why you making it sound like YOU don’t know what happened next and you need him to tell you???

- oh danny boy whistling while the couple he’s counseling walks in… is this a comedy or ?

- Daniel: yeah? 🤓 Armand: yeah 🫦

- “the mother of New Orleans” oh he misses home

- LMFAO Daniel interrupting Armand before he can start soliloquizing

- Louis and Claudia in a truck full of art which they belong in bc they too are pieces of art to me

- hard words. soft words. 🥺

- “a shit life beats no life” god damn this monologue feels like Louis is speaking directly to my soul

- “as long as you walk the earth I’ll never taste the fire” If this is foreshadowing I- I- I don’t know what I’ll do but it’s going to involve a baseball bat and a waffle iron and my head

- “it would be enough” pan to Lestat 💀 you can’t be fucking serious right now you just cannot

- okay it’s over and the teaser for the season just started playing and I just have to shout out the score bc damn if those violins don’t get me every god damn time

(Stutter) That’s all, folks! 🐷👋

#amc iwtv #interview with the vampire #lestat de lioncourt #loustat #iwtv season 2 #louis de pointe du lac #iwtv armand #iwtv claudia #iwtv s2 spoilers #iwtv spoilers #iwtv 2x01 #loumand #iwtv premiere

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dr-spectre · 6 months ago

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Talking about Side Order and... Marina. (SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!)

You know, i really enjoyed Side Order, like it wasn't perfect or anything but i had such a blast with it and if they continue to expand on it we could have something REALLY amazing. My reaction to the GOD DAMN TUTORIAL BOSS GOT ME HYPERVENTILATING! IM NOT JOKING! IT WAS SO EXCITING AND SHOCKING!!! THE FINAL BOSS WAS INCREDIBLE TOO! I was singing along to Spectrum Obligato and WHEN THEY BROUGHT IN THE STUFF FROM THE LIVE CONCERT VERSION OF EBB AND FLOW MY JAW DROPPED!!!

However i gotta admit, the story could have been better, what was the deal with the Octoling engineers Marina was talking about? That goes completely nowhere and i thought it was gonna build to something with the repeat playthroughs of the final boss.

And of course, the biggest missed opportunity in my opinion, Marina Agitando.

Now look, i wanna say right off the bat, the design is excellent, it was so smart to bring back her Order outfit and make her into a giant abomination that moves in such a weird way that makes you feel uncomfortable. When i saw her for the very first time when you enter the room, i stood there for at least a solid minute in complete disbelief and shock seeing a giant Marina in some octopus tentacle heart thingy that beats and pumps with the music. The song that plays too "Unconscience" is such a BANGER and honestly it rivals Octo Callie's Bomb Rush Blush remix in my opinion.

The build up for this was pretty good too, seeing Marina say "help me" before she was knocked unconscious and then possessed by Overlorder BROKE ME! I was like "OH NO! ITS HAPPENING AGAIN! NOT MARINA!!" The build up to the 10th floor was so anxiety inducing because you know in the back of your mind that Marina is gonna fight you but you don't know what it's gonna look like, if you were there since Splatoon 2 and have watched Pearl and Marina since the beginning then this build up is even more anxiety inducing and its pretty damn good. And once you free Marina she feels so sorry about what happened and helps you out to put things right, heck she goes through a small character arc of embracing chaos.... but... i have to say...

It is unfortunately not executed that well or with any depth in my opinion because they repeated the whole thing of "oh no a character we know is evil because of (quote on quote) mind control!!!! oh noooo!!" Which is a tired trope in this series that needs to stop or else I'm gonna get REALLYYYYYY pissed off.

I've done enough ranting about Callie's villain arc and how that has been misinterpreted and stuff, but for Marina, i really wish they didn't do the whole "oh no a character is evil because of an evil character oh nooo!! we gotta save them!!" thing again and i wish Marina was more of a villain with a sad motivation for her actions. As much as its cute to see Pearl and Marina act all flirty with each other in Side Order, it kinda ruins the mysterious and dark tone of the story that was teased from the trailers and the tutorial in my opinion. Everything is also explained so quickly early on which really sucks. I really wish Marina was actually conscious throughout her time as Marina Agitando and most of it should have been her fault. She does blame herself for creating Overlorder but it's kinda brushed aside quickly and Marina ends up being totally fine and free of guilt. There isn't enough depth to it which is so lame and a missed opportunity.

Marina is flawed, she makes mistakes and acts emotional and angry sometimes. We have seen a side of Marina where she snaps at Pearl when she loses Splatfests and has shown signs that she still hasn't recovered from her time before she met Pearl.

She picked team Order because she was genuinely scared that her new life would fall apart and she doesn't wanna lose the people (especially Pearl) that she's met and grown to love. Marina is also heavily theorized to be on the autism spectrum and as someone who is autistic, i can see myself in Marina, they could have really explored Marina's psyche and mental health in Side Order but they just... didn't. Instead she's put to sleep and controlled by her ai child and all of the focus is put on stopping it like a traditional "oh no we gotta stop an evil ai!! oh noo!!" story... ugh... I mean Smollusk is cute i guess but there's not a ton to them and they come off as yet another "evil ai that wants order and control!! roarrr!!!"

From reading the most recent interview on Side Order and seeing the concept art, they said that they wanted to tell a story about Marina losing herself to a machine that she created. Could you imagine how tragic it would have been to learn more about Marina and how she's so wrapped up in anxiety that she decides to make this replica of Inkopolis Square and make the Memverse? Maybe at first she makes it to help Sanitized Octolings just like in the dlc, but then maybe due to overwork and burnout (which Pearl mentions in the tutorial by the way), her emotions and anxiety become so strong that she becomes consumed by it, this obsession of order and trying to achieve happiness takes over her and then she gets the idea to spread this order to the real world, where her friends can be "happy" and "safe." Maybe Overlorder is still there but they just whisper to Marina, manipulate and point her in the right direction to continue to her mission of order instead of just fucking knocking her out and using her as a meat puppet for 5 minutes.

Could you imagine how much better the build up would have been to not see Marina until you get to the 30th floor for the first time and you got to unlock her diary entries beforehand? Seeing her thought process and her slow descent into becoming an antagonist. I'm not sure how they would have changed the permanent upgrades but they could have thought of something man. I get that they wanted to subvert expectations but, i think they should have gone WAY further with Marina Agitando.

I was waiting for Pearl and Marina to have their "Tidal Rush" moment where it's this emotional battle between the two, could you imagine how DEVISTATING a remix of Ebb and Flow would have been if it had gotten that "Tidal Rush" type of remix? Pearl singing her parts in this chaotic and emotional way, on the brink of tears trying to get Marina back and calm her down, and Marina trying to fight back against her words, not wanting to believe her because she's so wrapped up trying to make them both happy in her way. She's so caught up in order that she has forgotten what Pearl wants, that Pearl wants to be with her and go against any obstacle that stands in their way together. God i would have cried seeing that I'm not gonna lie. Maybe once Marina starts to think rationally, she breaks free from the machine and then leaps into Pearl's arms, and then we have to go back up the 30 floors to fight Overlorder and we slowly see Marina learn to embrace chaos throughout the floors instead of it just being at the final boss.

I really do feel like Splatoon has this issue of trying to appeal way too hard to kids and being really scared to dive into the flaws of these characters. They are so avoidant of being more serious and they hide it away in optional collectables and obscure posts on social media that creates misinformation and stories that feel way too undeveloped. They just say "oh this character has been brainwashed!!" which is such a lazy and bullshit trope they slap on these characters to avoid getting into their flaws for some stupid reason. (Hell that word has lost all meaning to me now to be honest. Like no, Callie wasn't "brainwashed" per say, hypnosis is not brainwashing or mind control I've said that a trillion times in other blog posts but whatever. Agent 3 was knocked out and had no clue on what was happening. They weren't "brainwashed" they were used as a puppet from a fucking goopy telephone for five minutes while they were asleep. Maybe its poor translation i don't know.)

I know that Splatoon is made for all ages and primarily for children but, i find that to be a stupid excuse for bad storytelling, a good story with depth that's explored and set up properly can be applied to all kinds of age groups not just adults. And the adults that say that shit too, why do you think like that? Why do you wish to dismiss that sort of thing in media? So what if it's made for kids? Adults write these stories and plant themes and arcs into them. Why do you think people cried over the Rosalina storybook in Mario Galaxy and think its the best part of that game? You don't want that kind of stuff in games because "they are made for kids"? Why do you think there are so many adults in the Splatoon community hmm?

I am so worried for Deep Cut in the next game because i really don't want this to happen again, i want an actual proper villain arc for either Frye or Shiver. No hypnosis, no brainwashing, no mind control. Just a pure fucking villain arc caused by the flaws of the characters and without the involvement of a third party. Please, i wanna see growth in these characters that is explored way more clearly and better. Or maybe don't do a villain arc again and just have Deep Cut be fully happy with each other and develop their relationship more with lore and backstory. PLEASE!

Anyways ramble over, thank you for reading!

#splatoon #splatoon 2 #splatoon 3 #splatoon marina #marina ida #pearl houzuki #pearl splatoon #side order #smollusk #long post #fanfic #fan concept #callie splatoon #marie splatoon #shiver splatoon #frye onaga

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sualne · 1 year ago

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Sorry if you're already working on this but with Luffy in Croc dad what's his hobby?? Like he's the biggest ball of energy and I think if wasn't fighting wild animals as a kid he would vibrate into another dimension from lack of stimulation. Does he draw and develop his art skills, has he taken up music or is he invested with the void century with Robin? Croc wants to keep him inside and safe so what did he think would be best to entertain him or does he buy a new thing every week that Luffy says he suddenly wants to do. Yes he looks at books but is that it. Also sorry if you answered this before and I've missed waht you said, I am pretty sure I've seen all your comics on this but I haven't seen all your ask answering questions.

i hadn't gotten these questions and im so glad you ask!! :D

so! luffy doesn't have one specific hobby and croc does end up giving him whatever he wants when he suddenly gets a new obsession, one of the reason he's so excited with finding the jewelry box and getting a dagger is because it's finally something new! after that he gets really into rings and knives until it gets bored of it and switch to something else again.

about him and learning about the void century with robin i actually got a comic later for that so i won't say anything here!

im going to make this a list and explain how it goes, under read more:

Fighting: this luffy doesn't know how to fight, but he still love the concept! he gets really excited hearing stories of fights, duels, martial arts and all the rest! In practice though, since he's been so sheltered and only ever saw one real fight that ended up with people being killed in front of him as a kid, if (haha) he were to witness another real fight he wouldn't be as giddy about it as when he hears stories. he does also learn the tiniest bit of kenpo from bonclay!

Dancing: luffy in canon loves dancing (and partying), here too! he doesn't know/master any specific styles but likes to drag people into dancing with him, if no one is around he'll grab some of the smaller bananawani instead.

Singing: he's still very bad at it.

Music: croc noticed how he'd taps on thing and tried to get him to learn some percussion, unfortunately for him, luffy doesn't care about music theory and just does whatever makes him happy. he also love loud noises and croc has to find a way to stop him from making a racket at any hours of the day, it gets worse when luffy loses some of his hearing and needs to make everything even louder. eventually he gets bored of it too.

Cooking: him and croc cooks together pretty often, if no one is there to supervise him luffy will ignore recipes and common sense, making all kind of abominations. it's a miracle he never set the kitchen on fire.

Bugs: he loves them! he collect them! alive. croc is horrified one day when he finds out baby luffy has been letting some food to rot so he could observes flies and larvae going through their little bug lives cycle. later croc gives him those pinned dead bugs collection boxes thinking luffy will like it, he doesnt.

Board&Cards Games: he mostly has to play them by himself, he doesn't like being alone so he'll often ends up playing it "with" the banawanis. after he loses a few too many times against the banawanis and can't get croc to join in for the millionth time he gives up on them. even when robin joins baroques works he still expect her to be too busy to play with him and doesn't ask (she would have accepted if he had asked).

Art&Craft: he tries a bit of everything, doing it his own way meaning most of it is kind of hideous or about to fall apart, canon luffy is completely fine with that, au luffy though, he's having ton of fun at first but when he gets old enough to see that his dad cant quite fake his enthusiasm or interest towards his disastrous creations he gets frustrated and stops for a while. later, robin finds an old drawing of his and thinks its cute so he start doodling a little again for her.

basically, he struggles keeping a hobby, some like fighting, dancing, bugs and staring at pictures in geography books he keeps through his life but mostly, he's very lonely and bored out of his mind, he's depressed, that's not something that can be helped for as long as he's isolated.

when robin becomes a part of his life everything gets better for him! she spends time with him, read stories for him, helps him get out more often, they even meet bonclay and for a few years he's genuinely happy.

#crocau ask #crocodad au #<- this one gets in the main tag cause this is important lore #i probably wont be able to show all of that in comic form so im glad i get to rant about it here!! it also turned out sadder than i expecte

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the-alarm-system · 6 months ago

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Anti Endos and Projection of Decisions and Hurt

I'd like to start this off with my story and how it relates to the experiences of many hurt anti-endos.

I don't remember a big chunk of my original trauma, most of it feels like a dream that has chunks guarded by Red our protector. I do have bits and pieces, and I know for a fact that I went through RAMCOA.

Growing up I got hurt by a lot of women, and one of those woman's personas got introjected into my system and would retraumatize me consistently for a few years. This was before I realized I was plural.

What Im trying to say is I have survived a lot of horrible shit, and I know it's why I'm plural, and I have had horribly abusive headmates before.

Anti Endos bring these forms of exo and internal abuse up whenever attacking the slogan "The future is plural". I saw an anti endo say

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And I got angry enough to make this. Maybe it was rage bait, but I'm convinced most of them genuinely believe this.

Using your own trauma and hurt to invalidate the existence of others is one of the most vile horrible things you can do. Not every traumagenic system is formed from programming, not every system existing is formed from programming. Trust me I know the pain of being hurt that way, but are you serious? Don't use your trauma to hurt others. No endo wants to fucking program a child and abuse them, this is just a false analogy used to bring fear to others and towards the movement. We are not the enemy.

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I have experienced strong negatives, I've felt strong dissociation, memory loss, and Scald has gotten lost before and we do struggle a lot in disordered experiences. But this is expecting that every system puts the negatives above the positives. This is expecting that your experience and perspective of your own system lines up with everyone elses. I don't care that I have so much to deal with, being a system makes me extremely happy and I would love to share that with others. Obvious negatives? Yes, but "few" positives? In my experience with DID, psychosis, and even BPD I do my best to see the lighter side of them because I wouldn't be me without them. I have so many more pros than cons that comes with being a system because I actively changed my perspective in order to accept ourselves. I had to see the joy of it because I was abusing Scald by not accepting him and giving him individuality. I understand a system seeing their DID as more negative than positive, but this is projection to others which is simply narrow minded.

Before going deeper, I want to affirm that I have no hatred towards those who go towards final fusion or uses parts language. This is an argument about those who project their end goals and hurt and suffering onto other systems in order to invalidate them.

While I may not experience this towards my own system, I can understand why others may despise being many and/or desire to end as a singlet. However in the argument against endos; being broken, wanting fusion, using parts language, and hating yourself as a system is bought up multiple times. Here are some examples:

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Their views on their systemhood, while valid, is narrowed to the expectation that every other system should see it that way and if they don't they are put into the pile of fakes and subject to harassment. Anti endos have called me disgusting simply for expressing how happy being a system makes me. It reminds me of when I was a transmedicalist(essay for later) to be honest.

If you don't want to fuse, if you don't see your systems existence as an abomination, and you desire better acceptance from the world

You are a fucked up groomer who is anti recovery, never wants to heal, and wants to abuse children.

I'm sorry I love my system

I'm sorry I found so much joy in my system that I would love for there to be more of us and better acceptance of us

I'm sorry that I'm not all pessimistic on my system

To be honest, I can't change the past I went through, I can't delete my system,

But maybe to me it's ok to see the good that came out of it even if its hard then and hard now

Projecting your perspective of your systemhood onto others though, projecting false analogies based on your own trauma, and expecting every experience to be the same as yours is vile and just self victimizing in order to hurt vulnerable systems looking for community.

Giving your sob story, ranting about how you hate your pieces/headmates, and then tying it up with "and thats why endos want to hurt children" is a different level of fucked up

small personal note: if I had to endure everything again just to be with Scald, I would Over and over and over Piss yourself mad about it antis, I love my system and we aren't faking because of it

#actually plural #plural community #plural system #plurality #traumagenic system #pluralgang #system things #did osdd #osdd system #pro endo #syscourse #syscource #tw syscourse

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happypot0001 · 4 months ago

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⚠️Character belongs to @just-a-carrot 🥕⚠️

OMGGG NOOO ORLAMMM DONT CRYY 😭😭😭😭

Pffft! Lots of love! 💕

CUT

HAAAA I made him look so dumb 😭😭😭😭

Pfffft omg this was soooo fun 🤩🤩💞💞!!!! 🥕 if you’re seeing this I’m so sorry for this abomination of a drawing 😆😆😆🥲🥲

GAAAAHHH Alright so you first may be thinking “Why is it a traditional drawing? All of Pots drawings have been digital??” Hah! I have an answer for you, my friend! So if you see my blog, you’ll see I said something about not being able to draw in one of my posts. I mean…yeah. The device that I usually draw on is currently unavailable to me at the moment 😭😭😭 so I haven’t been able to work on any of the art I have on my device 🥺🥺 After a good while of being bored and sad I couldn’t draw on my device…I soon realized…I can literally just draw on paper!!!! I probably should’ve realized it sooner but 😵‍💫😵‍💫 This actually hadn’t been my idea for my post though. I was going to do something really dumb and not at ALL OW related but I decided against it as the urge to draw Orlam overcame me pffft!

I actually didn’t want to draw Orlam because I wanted the first drawing that I share of Orlam to be a bit more special…but hey I hope this is special enough pfffft!! I have drawn Orlam before, I’ve just never really shared the drawing. The thing is, said drawing isn’t fully completed yet. I had an idea that I’m still working on and I wanted to wait until AFTER Art Fight to actually share it 😵‍💫 it’s nothing special but for some reason I sometimes convince myself that I can be humorous so I guess my little project is to test if other people think I am 😆😆 I’m going to try to note down every first I do on Tumblr so technically…this is my first time sharing a drawing of Orlam in his doodle form!!! Also my first time sharing traditional art so that’s a plus!!! 🤗

Literally could rant ALL DAY about Orlam but I’ll try not to pffft! “Contract Business Consultant and Entrepreneur” HELLO???? Like ORLAM LEVELED UP!!!! This is supposed to be a compliment to Orlam like IM LOWKEY PROUD????? If you give me like the timid, punching bag kind of character, I will ALWAYS be by their side until the end. I was lowkey rooting for Orlam I wanted the best for him 😭😭😭 AND HE GOT IT!!!! THEY ALL GOT IT!!!!! IM SO HAPPY FOR THE GANG OMG IM STILL CRYING FOR THEIR HAPPY ENDING 😭😭😭😭😭 Literally Orlam will always be the rat king 🐀👑 He will be OUR rat king and I will give him daily offerings 💎💵💴💶💷🧸🎁📱🖥️💻🏆 TAKE ALL OF IT ORLAM!!!!!

Heheeeee I don’t like picking favorites and especially not from the OW group but I won’t lie when I say that I was prooooobably looking out for Orlam majority of the game pffft! UGHGGHHHHH 🥕🥕🥕!!!!!!! Your characters are so easy to connect with!!!! The way 🥕 does everything is so amazing and I wish I could do something like them one day!!! Like their writing is ABSOLUTELY PHENOMENAL!!! Such an engaging story with engaging characters!! GAAAHHH I LOVE THE GAME!!!! Like I’m just saying…🥕omg I literally don’t know what to say anymore you have me starstruck from your game🥰🥰 SORRY IF YOU READ ALL OF MY USELESS RANTING I JUST LIKE TALKING 😭😭😭 UGHHH I LOVE EVERYTHING!!!!💕💕 WHOEVER IS READING I LOVE YOU TOO!!!! (Platonically😌)

☺️☺️ Lots of love to anyone reading once again!! 💕💕💕

#ow #our wonderland #fanart #ow: orlam #ow: doodle #doodle #traditional art #fanart: our wonderland #fanart: Orlam #ITS THE RAT KING!!!!#ALL HAIL!!!!#WE MUST ALL BOW!! 🙇

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nari-roll · 1 year ago

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hihi could you make a wrio x reader fic where reader is an avid tea hater??? you don’t have to do it but maybe just an idea? :DD

OF COURSE!! i don’t like tea as much either but maybe i might change my mind if it’s wriothesley- thank u for the req! 🫶 again, i’m not rlly an experienced writer so pls don’t expect too much 🥹

—also panic writing bc im nervous for my presentation tomorrow

——————————————————————————

makeshift tea sweetener

wriothesley x reader | fluff! (implied relationship!!)

does milk tea actually count as tea like is it an abomination to europeans or what

“That is the most disgusting thing i’ve ever tasted.”

“Sorry what?” I asked incredulously.

Wriothesley crosses his arms at your response. “Sweetheart, there is no way you actually consider that as tea.”

“Uh!” My brows furrowed and I was ready to create a whole ass essay defending the best drink in the world. “My bubble tea tastes far better than yours! Your tea is so bland and it tastes like- i don’t know! wet wipes!”

He gently picked up his teacup, mumbling a “well..maybe if you kissed me, it’d taste better”, before taking a short sip.

The look of surprise was evident on my face but it quickly faded to a smile. “Oh yeah? bet.”

I suddenly pull on his tie, bringing his face dangerously close. Soon enough, the space between us closed and I planted a short kiss on his lips. His eyes widened at the sudden initiative, almost dropping his beloved teacup.

Somehow the floral and distinct lemony flavor of the tea was heightened or maybe it’s because of the way it sits on his lips that make the flavors come together, but boy, was it addicting.

After what seems to be a few seconds, I pull away to see a rare sight of a flustered Wriothesley. With a smile, I licked my lips in content and easily came up with a verdict.

“You’re right, it is sweeter~”

#cinna’s archives (ﾉ´ з `)ノ #wriothesley x reader #wriothesley #tea isn’t so bad if it’s on him #genshin x reader #genshin fanfic #genshin impact #wriothesley is so cute #i love wriothesley

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tizeline · 5 months ago

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are you scared of bees? Im scared of bees myself tbh. They dont give me nightmares of anything but i get really nervous if i see one, even dead ones

First of all, bugs in general? GOOD LORD I really don't like them! Some are worse than others of course, I don't really have any beef with ladybugs, bumblebees, butterflies, normal flies or ants and so on. Mosquitos are annoying, but they don't freak me out or anything.

I used to be terrified of bees and wasps when I was younger, like I'd literally run away from them lmaooo. Then one summer I was at this scout camp for a week where there were a LOT of bees or wasps (don't remember which one they tend to get lumped together for me) And like, that could've easily just re-inforced my fear of the little shits but I got lucky I guess and it actually worked as some kind of exposure therapy? So that experience kinda forced me to stop being so scared of bees/wasps...... okay well they do admitedly still freak me out a little bit but I can handle being close to one without panicking so it's a win in my book!

Of course, my recently overcome intense fear of wasps and bees immidietly got replaced by an intense fear of SPIDERS instead so!? Fuck me I guess!?!? So yeah, now I can't handle spiders (I know they're not really insects but they look similar enough so to me they fall into the same category)

I also cannot stand ...horse-flies? I think they're called horse-flies in english?? But anyway I think I'm completely justified in that fear considering, unlike bees and wasps that'll only hurt you if you anger them, horse-flies will literally seek you out! They want to bite you!! JERKS!!!

And lastly I wanna point out my beef with fucking moths! There's definitely worse bugs out there but UNFORTUNATELY FOR ME the internet LOVES moths so I have to see pictures of them EVERYWHERE!! And people keep insisting that they're cute?? Well good for you that you enjoy them but I STG everytime I am subjected to a close-up picture of these abominations my fear of them is just re-inforced like ughhhhhhhh

Anyway, sorry for the rant, I have a lot of built up emotions about bugs that you kinda unleashed lmao my bad. XD And just to make it clear, yes I understand how essential bugs are to nature and if you guys like them I am truly happy for you because I would not wish my struggle upon anyone, I however live in constant agony!

#i just wish they were easier to avoid man :/#i love nature and forests but it's really hard to spend time there when the Insect Armies are constantly tryin to get ya #tizel talk

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fivrilio · 6 months ago

Text

(⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠) Teaser

Act 1: 𝘐𝘤𝘦𝘥 𝘊𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘦 𝘗𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦!

"Ohgeezohgeezohgeez!" A hurried Y/N began muttering out loud. Hurriedly pouring the freshly brewed coffee into a cup with such practiced ease but with a slight shake.

The coffee shop was never this packed before. A waitress rushing to place the perfectly made brews by the barista right on time and the correct table. Talking soon covered the whole room with a slow and steady hum.

Yet, Y/N is steady, but not slow.

Being understaffed, she was the only one working behind as her co-worker did the cashiering and the other did the serving duty. She made sure not to make a mess and made extra extra sure not to mistake a order or else she'll be dead.

"One order for Mikayla? Iced Americano please!" She rang out, ringing the bell to hopefully catch the attention of the so called 'Mikayla.'

A pretty girl stood up and got hers, thanking Y/N before leaving the store. Y/N felt a short happiness rush through as she heard the small thanks and continued back to her work.

Soon, the numbers began to dwindle down only leaving a small numbers. Three students and one elderly who was only eating salad.

Y/N sighed in relief as she was finally able to sit and rest her hands and feet. Although the ringing of the bell from the door rang out and Y/N was immediately shot back awake.

It was a tall man with wavy violet hair. This, combined with the gold laurel-like accessory on his head. Y/N was already tired and asked her friend who previously served to cover up, since there was less costumers.

Y/N went to the back and did a slight doze before her clock chimes. Trying to get the most amount of rest.

That was until only five minutes has passed and she was already hearing a complaint in her sleep.

"What is this? I ordered for a black coffee. I did not ask for this abomination." The guy with the violet hair said, placing the indeed black coffee on the counter. Xinshi, Y/N's co-worker trembled. "S-Sir! that is our best black coffee! took from the–" "Spare me your nonsense. Clearly, you do not know how to make a simple drink. Who is the one in charge of making all these?"

Y/N stepped out, still half high from her short doze. "Here.." she raises her hand up as she went over and took care of the problem. "What seems to be wrong about the drink sir?"

"Well, clearly this wasn't evenly poured. The fact I had to spit this out mid-way on my walk was absolutely unpleasant." The male complained.

"Well, sir. It says here on the register you ordered a Americano." She says, trying to be as nice as possible even with the stares from the students. The elderly long gone since then.

"Nonsense! I asked your.. friend directly for a black coffee. I am a busy and important man and I need coffee to start my day." He spat out, marking the friend part as if he despised the word.

"Oh, Xinshi~ Did you hear him say black coffee?"

"I-i.. I kinda heard it.. I must've mixed it up.. Im sorry Y/N.." Xinshi admitted.

"See? I won't have this tolerated. I expect a refund for my coffee."

— End of Teaser.

Description: ✨

#aesabella ✨#Dr ratio #Dr ratio x reader #yandere dr ratio #yandere honkai star rail #honkai star rail #honkai sr #yandere hsr #yandere fic #yandere post #dr ratio smut #hsr x reader

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arisunakayama · 2 years ago

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WAIT I FORGOR TO MENTION THAT THE FLUFFY GRUNTS WERE THE MAIN 4 AAAAA IM SO SORRY ILL ADD ANOTHER WEIRD DRAWING 😭😭

you can always add additional grunts :)))))

Fluffy!Main Four + Tricky X Reader

Tricky’s is a little short considering I didn’t really have much to write for him *dies*

[MAIN FOUR]

How this happened? Absolutely no fucking clue. At least specifically.

All you remember was going on a mission with the main four on infiltrating some AAHW building where some experiments were happening.

The five of you did manage to get to the room where the scientist and a couple of abominations resided in.

But something had happened to where there was an explosion where you and the others were knocked out.

You woke up to a pressure on your chest, eyes fluttering to see four little fluffy puffballs that oddly looked like if a cat and a grunt were mixed together

What was even more strange was the fact they looked like Sanford, Deimos, Hank and 2BDamned

You stare at them for a brief moment, listening to the high pitched mews coming from them, especially the ones that looked like Deimos and Sanford.

Suddenly you come to realization that it was them.

You scoop them up in your arms, ignoring the surprised yowls and quickly speed all the way back to S.Q

Once you had gotten back to the tower, you quickly make your way back to Doc’s office, setting them down on his desk table before trying to process what the hell had just happened to your S/Os.

You were to entangled in your own thoughts that you had to be quickly brought to reality by 2BDamned’s loud mewings to catch your attention.

You apologize a little before going to the four of them, gently petting them only to hear a soft purr coming from the two.

The loudest being Deimos and Sanford while there was a soft and barely audible one coming from both Doc and Hank

You definitely knew it was them considering how accepting one pair was with affection compared to the other two.

The days did go by though with the five of you trying to figure out how to change them back.

Doc would mostly be on the desk with you, watching over the work you took on while the other three would lay and nap on you.

Hank would mostly occupy your thighs and make sure the other two wouldn’t get a spot on his favorite spot.

Even before being turned into a fluffy, he loved your thighs. Regardless of how thick or thin they were.

You remember he physically fought the three of them because Sanford tried to make himself comfortable on your lap.

You had to separate them considering Hank was the biggest

But the other two did manage to find a spot by perching themselves on your shoulders, purring nonstop. Deimos being the one to constantly rub himself against your chin.

You weren’t going to lie, the four of them were absolutely adorable how they were and it made you melt at how soft they were.

Hell even sleeping with all of them piled on top of you, purring away and lulling you to sleep.

It was even cute with seeing how they play with each other. Watching them chase each other around the room to get some sort of exercise or training.

Well mostly Hank, Deimos and Sanford. Doc would be with you in a loaf as you petted him. Still it was very cute to see. They did heavily remind you a lot like cats.

But you still wanted them back the way they were. You heavily missed your boys if anything.

The weeks did pass by and there was a moment where you yourself had to seek out Jebediah himself to help you out.

Despite the hissing and spitting that came from Hank himself.

Sanford and Deimos very trustful either considering you saw how puffed their fluff was

Doc on the other hand was indifferent and actually encouraged you to seek him out considering he also wanted to go back the way he was

Jeb himself was surprised at the sight of the four of them before reluctantly agreeing to help you guys out

It did take a couple more weeks though considering you and Jeb had to raid a couple of labs to figure out a way to turn the four of them back.

The halo wasn’t a way to bring them back, trust me he did try.

Once you guys did find a way to turn the four of them back, you immediately three yourself onto the four of them, welcoming them back as they were in their normal forms.

The four of them also seemed to be glad as they wrapped their arms around you into a tight hug.

Well, mostly Sanford and Deimos. Hank did give you a hug, but it was more like he just held you there with him while the other two were angry and yelling at him for hogging you all to himself.

Doc did hug and praise you as well along with thanking Jeb for assisting you.

They did tease you though about the little baby voices you made at them while they were fluffy grunts though.

But oh well, you make fun of them as well for the stuff they’ve done while they were turned.

[TRICKY]

With Tricky it’s a bit more simpler with him. At least with how he turned into a fluffy grunt.

And that’s just because he turned himself into one.

Because you were talking about how cute animals were despite there being none in Nevada….

Unlike the main four he willingly turned himself into a fluffy grunt and can turn himself back whenever he wanted to.

It’s just right now he wants you to pay attention to him now that he turned himself into something that looked very similar to a cat and a grunt.

Even as a fluffy grunt he’s very excitable and hyper considering how much he’s would dart around the rooms.

Hell he would even constantly yowl for you to pay attention to him.

A chaotic little shit he is. There was even a time you woke up to him literally sitting on your face.

But hey he’s also had his moments by constantly cuddling up to you, purring the time away or by constantly rubbing himself against you.

Not only that, he does notice when you do get overstimulated and tries to calm down a bit for you.

None the less he’s still very sweet and loves to give and get your attention on him by doing cute things.

But he will only do them for you and you only.

With anyone else he’s a fucking menace. And still would kill someone who isn’t you

Then again you did warn those around you about him

#madness combat x reader #madcom x reader #hank j wimbleton x reader #2bdamned x reader #deimos x reader #sanford x reader #madness tricky x reader #tricky x reader

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frozenjokes · 7 months ago

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just wanted to poke in here to say im absolutely in love with scar in your cubscarian au. man who has such a fragile sense of identity and cannot handle people who Dont Like Him because he has to be liked by everyone, right? if he just changed how he acts for certain people, surely they would love him too, Right??? im so invested in seeing where his story goes, sorry to hear about The Plague i hope you get better and lots of kudos for all the writing you do !!

thank you so much!! I like to draw things for people who send me asks and when I attempted to do so for you I have created the worst abomination known to man where so much went wrong I just had to stop. this is a sign I should never draw micah ever! killing him.

he looks so gay and so stupid. both of these things are true about him however that was not the vibe. anyway two people having a crisis! yippee! (this was going to be the scene where Grian asks his name and Scar is scrolling through baby names. Multiple parts of this were redrawn several times. Some days you just have to admit defeat.)

#hermitcraft #gtws #goodtimeswithscar #grian #I need to make a stupid tag for this au #I’ll do it. eventually

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darishima · 3 months ago

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puppy your game collection is beautiful i dont know what most of those are except like the disgaeas (because youve explained them before), disco elysium (the occasional meme crosses my dash), roblox, and undertale maybeeeeee you could give me a tour of the others you like and what theyre about and stuff! whats muse dash ouppy that sounds like a rhythm game ^w^

thank you i know its incredible :3c soo here it is again i will go game by game and yap my ouppy little head off im sorry

starting from the left! desmume is a DS emulator that i got to play puyo puyo fever, a fullmetal alchemist ROM and a lucky star ROM and PPSSPP is a PSP emulator i got for uhh. i cant remember which game i specifically installed it for. i think it was puyo puyo fever 2?

roblox is. you know. roblox

my hero one's justice is a demo i downloaded from steam which i have not actually played LMAO i got the demo to see if i wanted to buy the full game but i guess its pointless because i havent bothered to check out the demo

class of 09 and class of 09 re-up (the sequel) are visual novels, hard to explain what theyre about.. basically its all about toxic evil yuri and drug abuse and self harm. its like if needy streamer overload was about coked up high school lesbians

disgaea pc is the second best game ever made

disgaea 2 pc is the number 1 best game ever made. no further explanation necessary

i have not actually played dont starve yet, it was recommended by a friend so i bought it during the steam summer sale for like 2 bucks. from what ive heard, its a survival game, kinda like minecraft if minecraft was way harder and the game hated you

disco elysium is the same, recommended by a friend, i bought it for super cheap during the summer sale, and have not touched it yet LMAO

muse dash is a rhythm game yes and its FUCKIGN INCREDIBLE. AND IM AMAIZNG AT IT. LOOK AT THESE SCORES BONESY ARENT YOU PROUD OF ME

full combo means i hit every note and didnt miss a single one >:3 im genuinely really good at the game not 2 brag,,, and YES you saw that right, hatsune miku and kagamine rin and len are playable characters!! they come with two respective DLCs which also come with a bunch of vocaloid songs and i bought them both <3 these are their sprites in game!

and if you buy it it gives you a bunch of adorable art on the loading screens :3 this isnt even all of them just a few i screenshotted. if i screenrecorded myself killing it in muse dash would you watch the video teehee...

ok back to game yapping. leaf blower revolution is an idle clicker game i got for free on steam, which i got insanely hyperfixated on for three days and played for like 14 hours straight once and then gave up and never touched it again

yume nikki is a little pixelated adventure game where you explore around a girl's weird dreams. the soundtrack is INCREDIBLE especially this song. its transcendental. listen to it while youre high trust me you have to

DDLC requires no explanation i think. its ddlc. you know what it is theres no way you dont

the song of saya (saya no uta) i will be yapping extra about because i LOVE IT. its a horror eroge visual novel about a guy named fuminori who, after a brain surgery, sees the entire world and other people as a disgusting fleshy abomination, whereas everything looks normal to other people. for example this:

is a completely normal hallway. but it looks like that to him. then he meets a girl name saya, who is the only thing in the world that looks normal to him, and he falls in love with her

and i reeeally really dont wanna spoil it cause its really good and i highly recommend you go watch it (theres a full playthrough on youtube) but lets just say saya is Not as normal as she looks.

celeste is a game ive only played a little of, but i love it so far. its a platformer about a trans woman named madeline climbing celeste mountain, and encountering a personification of her self doubt that she has to overcome to get to the top. i lovee the style of the game its so pretty and way easier than i expected it to be, which is great for me because im garbage at every game in the world that isnt muse dash or disgaea

disgaea 4 and disgaea 5 are self explanatory. i ADORE d4, though im not super far into it, but i havent started d5 yet im waiting until i finish d1 and 4

phantom brave is a game set in the same universe as disgaea which crosses over with it, i havent played more than a few minutes of the game but obviously i love it so far cause its similar to disgaea. im waiting to jump fully into it until i finish d1 and d4 though

OFF is an rpg also recommended to me by a friend, i downloaded it online but havent touched it yet 😭 pro at owning games i dont play

omori is also very self explanatory. i downloaded it off my friends steam account and he and i have been playing it together, im not far in but obviously i like it, i knew i would. aubrey is sooo mecore <3 i really need to keep playing it... i should have gotten into omori sooner. actually no i take that back because i think 14 year old me getting into omori would have been so world-ending that it would have shattered my psyche

spore is spore. idk how to describe it. you make a fucked up little creature and you make the fucked up little creature do shit thats the whole game

undertale is also very self explanatory. and boom thats all my games :3 well i also have animal jam classic which didnt fit in the screenshot but theres not much to say about that. other than the fact that i own a super rare nonmember mantis pet and im proud of it. and my den fucks

okay thats more than enough yapping im sorry .. stop asking me questions because i do not know how to shut up. ily though thank you for asking :3c

#🦴 anon #also your ask about togachako has been sitting unanswered in my inbox because i know that the minute i decide to answer it #im going to be typing for three hours and youre going to get a 10k word essay #so. im waiting #until i have the time and also the brain to do all taht #im sorry in advance for whatever my reply to that will be

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