#so if u have further questions. go there first lmao

[moonshynecybin]

hi, i hope this isn't weird but you're like a motogp scholar to me and i have a question bc i can't really find an answer; do you know of the medical specifics of marc's arm injury? like ik what happened but i haven't been able to find an article beyond oh he broke it. like is there a reason it's so bad and why he had to get multiple surgeries for it? like was it crushing nerve ends, grinding cartilidge, etc? tysm if u decide to answer

the best and most direct source for this is gonna be marc marquez all in. they’ll show you the bone scans and walk you through the rotation of how it healed and some info about the other surgeries etc but theres also a lot it leaves out about BEFORE that surgery so i'll try and help out. HUGE caveat that i’m not a doctor but the GENERAL info goes like this:

jerez, july 2020: marc fractures his right humerus after the tire of his bike hits it during a highside near the end of the race. he flies to barcelona, gets one million nails and a plate put in himself by perennial motogp bone saw doctor xavier mir, and hopes to show up the next week to race four days after surgery (also in jerez #covid)… at the time its all kinda standard if like. a lil crazy but he is honestly really flippant about the whole thing you get the sense that (like others before him) he kinda thinks what he’s doing is badass. i mean he’s postin this shit on instagram like LOOK AT MEEE

anyways so he is declared fit to ride (NO RADIAL NERVE DAMAGE YAYYY), the test for which seems to be doing decline porno pushups with his cock out. and it’s all kinda like. well this is a short, 13 round championship year, so every race counts and marc has just won four championships in a row (6 out of the last 7 years!!!) and has something fundamentally wrong in his brain. marc voice well yeah jorge lorenzo came back after collarbone surgery in 2013 and it depleted him for years but im different. im better. PLUS it’s alex’s first year in the premier class (also at factory honda which is a can of worms we shant get into) so he’s not as involved in monitoring his insane older brother as he is post-arm saga bc he has shit to do and marc hasn’t missed a GP due to injury at this point since his first bout of diplopia in 2011. hes broken his leg a few weeks before the season before and been fine. marc is marc. so he’s gonna try and race.

anyways! that doesn’t happen lol. marc DOES go out for all the practices (the death nell.) but it’s p clear that the arm is fucking busted. he stresses the injury the fuckkkk out (probably where the bone gets rotated? unsure) and then goes out for one lap of quali and can’t do it anymore, pulls out then and there and is like okay. i’ll rest on it

august 2020: now here’s where i’m like hm. because according to MARC, he is a perfect angel doing PT until he randomly opens a glass sliding door one day and the arm rebreaks (SHOULD be kinda impossible with all the hardware in him lol). i frankly suspect that he was also doing motorcross training to put more stress on it bc he mentions that his people have had to remove the wheels from his personal bikes to stop him from training before (to be fair i think this was during the shoulder rehab he was doing during the 2019/20 winter) and like. you don’t get that kinda policing from the guys who love you without some previous behaviors lmao. also literally he was posting himself doing weight training on that arm on tiktok the day before as evidenced below. i digress but the bone is broken!!! and he gets more surgery from dr. xavier mir. and oh boy does it heal wrong

so there’s not a lot of updates in this time bc marc is like. in his cave in cervera rehabbing like wow what a setback gee i sure can’t wait to be back on my bike… like i don’t think it had really set in that this was a lifelong injury yet. and unforch in december it’s revealed that the fracture is not healing, and he needs further surgery. this time he nixed dr mir and went to a specialist clinic in madrid (that’s partly why he moved there !!)

the clinic also discovered there was a previous infection in his bone, which probably halted the healing process further. it should be noted marc does not go to dr. mir for surgery anymore, which genuinely could mean absolutely nothing. he stayed in the hospital on iv antibiotics for ten days

after this and a LOT of time in the sling (12 weeks is best practice who knows what marc practice is lmao) he comes back to motogp in april of 2021 for the portuguese grand prix, with the stated goal of building up strength in his arm and evaluating where he’s at, which tells you how hard that last surgery was on him. in 2021 i think it starts to set in that this isn’t going to go away, and during this whole year and the next he’s in clear pain every time he’s on the bike AND the bike is kinda bad so its just awful hell lol. like yes he does win a few races but he cries every time and you can tell its really getting to him. this is the period that alex talks about where the pain is the worst, and marc is being mean to everyone around him, and he’s taking a lot of painkillers and complaining about having pimples/losing weight on instagram and generally having a miserable time. he calls this period "a nightmare" all the time

okay now we fast forward until 2022. marc has moved to madrid to get a girlfriend to see his bone doctor more. and the pain is NOT stopping. and the bike honestly sucks so hes not winning AND he just had a diplopia relapse so whats the POINT. and he's suffering and can feel the time in his career ticking downward like sand slipping through an hourglass and he goes to the all or nothing nuclear option and reaches out to the mayo clinic in the USA to see a specialist and see if he can do anything for him, disregarding the rest of the 2022 motogp season. and the specialist says yeah. we took a 3D scan of that bone you just spent a year of your life healing and it looks BUSTED AS HELL. truly from the stress he put on that thing while it was still healing it rotated 34 degrees and THATS part of why it hurts so much. its why he has no strength in his elbow, why he can’t brace anything with it, why his range of motion is so limited, why he can’t open a bottle of water by himself. it’s really degrading his quality of life, and most important to marc: its fucking with his riding lol.

and this doctor says well we break the bone again, rotate it back normally, and see how it goes. it could give you less pain and more ability to brake into corners. it could ALSO end your career. and marc sees the bone scans and agrees to surgery p much immediately. and he gets mayo clinic surgery in minnesota and takes hot girl instagram pics outside because of course he does. the craziest part of this article is when the surgeon says marc has "a great capacity for sacrifice"

and he gets another badass scar and thats where we are today! as to where the arm is now. well he says its isnt a normal arm but its more "uncomfy" in day to day life. i dont believe him but thats fine. like he DOES do a lot of maintenance on the arm i think thats fair to say. he has a limited range of motion. mat oxley says he'll wait until he thinks no one is watching and look like hes in pain when hes in the paddock. his gq interview w "essential things" included a massage gun and PT rubber bands. he stretches it out before races p extensively. he has a PT gurney in his living room. idk, he contradicts himself on this fairly regularly in order to suit his rhetorical needs at a given time, but im inclined to believe that hes in a LOT more pain than he lets on, he just also has more mobility to do sports things (his base level on his hierarchy of needs) and is in a lot less pain than he was in 2022. i think theres also a point that marc brings up in the documentary here that should be noted-- he emphasizes that he didnt do this to improve his quality of life (alex is the only one who mentions this actually, and HE makes a deliberate point to) but instead that he did it so he could win. i'd invite you to do with that information what you will !!!

sources: x, x, x, x, x, x

[loveharlow]

can u write a fic with jealous!jj ur blurb was soooo good

⋯ ♡ᵎ 💬 : idk why i had this idea and i just thought it was so jj, not really a part two to the first jealous!jj blurb because they're together in this one

swearing (probably), jealous!jj, sexual innuendoes

You were sprawled across JJ's bed, phone in hand, a soft smile playing on your lips as your thumbs flew across the screen. Beside you, JJ was engrossed in his game, controller clutched tight. The only sounds filling the room were the simulated gunfire and his shouts at John B and Pope.

Once the current round ended, he glanced over, catching the gentle glow of your phone illuminating your face. He loved seeing you happy and smiling, but curiosity gnawed at him.

"...Who's got you all giggly?" he teased, though there was a hint of something else in his voice—something a little offended, shaky, and uncertain.

You glanced up at him for a moment before looking back down. "Oh, just Liam, the foreign exchange student," you replied casually. "He was confused about the group project, but I explained it to him. Now he's telling me about his family back home."

Liam. The name had been popping up in your conversations more frequently lately. He was the new kid at school, and you, being you, had naturally gravitated toward making him feel welcome, especially when you realized he was struggling to catch up. He was nice, a little awkward, and definitely harmless. But JJ didn't know that.

A silence stretched between you. You could feel JJ's gaze on you, heavier now. When you finally looked up, he wasn't starting another game. He'd even muted his mic. He was just watching you, a slight frown creasing his brow.

"Has he made any other friends,like... besides you?" he asked, scratching his head. "You two talk a lot..."

You chuckled softly, setting your phone down. "I mean, I would hope so. I see him talking to other people sometimes." Sitting up, you crossed your legs and scooted closer to your boyfriend, running your fingers through his hair. "What's up, J? Why do you look like that?"

He sighed, setting the controller down beside him. "Nothin', it's just… every day it's 'Liam this, Liam that.' And you get all smiley, and it's like I become invisible to you..."

There it was. The subtle, adorable jealousy. It wasn't an accusation, just a quiet confession of his own insecurity. JJ Maybank, the fearless Pogue, a little bit possessive over you. It made your heart ache in the best way.

But it also made you frown. The last thing you'd ever want was to be a source of any kind of pain for JJ.

So, an idea sparked in your mind. Picking up your phone, you went to your conversation with Liam, scrolling all the way to the top as JJ stared, confused. Once you got to the very first message, you held the phone out in JJ's direction. "Read it," you urged, pushing the phone further toward him.

"I—I don't need to go through your phone, baby—"

"I know," you said simply. "I want you to."

A silence fell between you two. JJ trusted you, and you trusted him. He didn't want to feel like he was pressuring you or doubting you. But despite that, he took the phone from you, eyes scanning the messages.

They were harmless—introducing yourself, talking about meeting with the rest of the group for the project, answering his questions. It was nothing concerning.

But one thing did catch JJ's attention.

His name, mentioned multiple times throughout the text thread at random points.

You Hey Liam, you doing okay? I noticed you weren't talking that much today.

Liam Yes, I'm alright. Just a bit homesick. Thank you for asking.

You Oh, that sucks, I'm so sorry. Do you want to talk about it?

Liam No, no, that's okay. I don't want to bother you.

You It's okay, you're not. I'm watching my boyfriend fix his bike, so better to distract myself before I try to jump his bones lmao

Liam Oh, you have a boyfriend? How long?

You I didn't tell you? That's odd, he's all I talk about lol. But his name's JJ, you've probably seen him around. We've been together for a little over 2 years.

Liam That's nice. It makes me miss mon amour back home in France. She sends me pictures and things everyday, but it's not the same... [1 Attachment] This is her, her name is Cami.

You Aw, she's beautiful! Hey, I'm pretty sure there's a program that help foreign exchange students reconnect with their families. They'll fly them out to you, I think, but there's probably some kind of criteria. I'll send you the link, though.

Liam Really? Dieu vous bénisse, Y/N!!

Something in JJ's heart swelled. He never truly doubted you or suspected anything, but seeing the way you talked about him—just because you wanted to talk about him—made him feel impossibly loved. You loved him, and you never failed to make sure everyone around you knew it.

You weren't all smiley because you were talking to Liam. You were all smiley because you were talking about him.

Dropping the phone on the mattress, JJ's hands took hold of your face and brought you in for a kiss, kissing you like he'd never have the chance to do it again. Lips slipped against one another, tongues dipping in between as you struggled to breathe.

When he finally pulled back, he had the dizziest grin on his face.

"I love you, munchkin."

You rolled your eyes, pushing him by the shoulder despite the sheepish smile on your face. "Stop calling me that," you scoffed, picking the device back up. "Come here," you urged, waving JJ over.

He obeyed, scooting close enough across the mattress so you could go behind him, slinging your arms over his shoulders, the phone in front of both of you as JJ tried to figure out what you were doing.

"Look at the camera, genius," you laughed, one hand gripping his chin and turning his face to look at the camera. You dipped down, placing a wet kiss against his cheek as he laughed, his face turning a dangerous shade of red just as the camera clicked. "There," you smiled, arms still over JJ's shoulders as he watched you send the picture to Liam, typing out a message underneath.

You [1 Attachment] This is JJ, my boyfriend I was telling you about.

"...You didn't have to do that," JJ said, though his heart was beating outside of his chest, one of his hands resting on your arm.

"I know," you smiled once more, planting a kiss to the side of his temple. "I wanted to. Whatever I can do to make you worry less."

JJ smiled to himself as he watched Liam's response come through.

Liam Ohhh, that guy? I was wondering why he'd glare at me when I passed him in the halls. I guess I know now lol. You two are cute. Tell him I said hey!

"See?" you told JJ, holding the phone up. "There's nothing to worry about." You assured, throwing the phone back on the bed as JJ turned to look at you. "I love you, Maybank. And if it makes you feel better, I have no problem talking to him less."

"...Thank you," JJ said softly, brushing your hair behind your ear.

"That's what I'm here for," you smiled brightly, pecking him on the lips. "Now, go back to the lobby! It's me and you time now, only us," you piped up, unwinding your arms from his shoulders and leaning half of your frame off the mattress to get your Nintendo Switch that had fallen off the bed.

With your ass in the air, JJ took the opportunity to squeeze it — you immediately popped back up and swatted his hand away. "Stop that, unless you plan on doing something about the problem it always causes," you glared playfully at him.

"Hey, you know I'm always up for it."

You scoffed, powering on the device in your hands. "I'm aware, hornball," you smiled, leaning back against his pillows. "You can turn me every way but loose after we run 2v2s with Pope and John B. We have to redeem ourselves from last time," you declared. "Invite me, blondie."

JJ Maybank Taglist in replies!

feedback is appreciated! thanks for reading. follow & turn on post notifs for @theharlowpost for writing exclusive updates!

©loveharlow

[junicult]

!! showering w the bachelors for the first time

contains ; mostly fluff. fem!farmer. some suggestive parts. making out. newly established relationships. nsfw in sebastian’s, implied in shane’s & alex’s. afab!farmer. brief mention of fingering. not proofread, will later.

note ; i intended for this to be entirely sfw i swear

harvey.

- the honeymoon phase.

- where he doesn’t even live with you, yet he’s at your house nearly every night, or sometimes vise versa.

- when he uses your stove (with permission) to make you both dinner to share after you’ve finished work.

- where you’re still so in love all you wanna do is gaze into each others eyes and kiss until you can’t breathe.

- that’s exactly what kind of phase you’re in.

- and it’s been a long time since he’s been in that phase.

- you sorta have a whole routine atp.

- whenever he comes over, you make it a plan to wrap up work quickly & spend the evening with him,

- which is why you felt so guilty when you lost track of time, backpack full of rocks and geodes you couldn’t wait for clint to break open the next morning.

- when you glanced down at your watch, you nearly jumped ten feet in the air like a cartoon lmfao

- and you’ll definitely regret running up the ladder one level before you reached another button on the elevator—but right now, you weren’t even focused on that.

- by the time you made it back to your house, a mere two hours after you told harvey you’d be back, it was pitch-black outside.

- thankfully, he didn’t leave. instead, he stood scrubbing the dishes clean, before whipping around at the sudden swing of your front door.

- “harvey! i’m so sorry, i lost track of ti—“

- “oh thank yoba you’re okay,” he sighs, (u already know he wanted to call someone to check up on u but he didn’t want to seem controlling😭😭)

- and he didn’t waste a second to meet you at the door, scanning you just to see if you were injured.

- “i’m fine, i’m fine, just got way too distracted. did you make dinner? did you have to eat alone?? oh, i’m so so sorry i didn’t mean to—“

- ur word vomit is making him fall in love with you even more. two peas in a pod🫶🫶

- then it’s just back and forth of you constantly questioning and reassuring each other for a few moments.

- “but you made such a nice meal for me, and i kept you waiting, i just—i’m so sorry—“

- “sweetheart, it’s okay, i’m not mad,” he almost chuckles, holding you close.

- as soon as he established you’re not hurt or injured, he’s no longer stressed.

- he understands what it’s like getting carried away at work, so who is he to ever be mad at you for that?

- after you ate and assured him you were fine, that’s when you mentioned it.

- “i’m pretty dirty from the mines, i was gonna shower. make up for lost time with me?”

- his mind doesn’t inherently go to sexual things.

- honestly, he was just excited you wanted to.

- he also doesn’t give a fuck that he took a shower earlier. he just wants to spend time with you lol.

- although ik he’s all organized and has like a little routine where you both keep taking turns under the spray LMFAO

- like you get in first, rinse yourself off, then switch with him while you soap yourself up, switch & rinse, switch and apply shampoo, switch, etc, you get it.

- it’s so fucking funny LMAO.

- but the entire time you’re making casual conversation, some little comments about how much you missed each other, things like that.

- he loves how you look in the shower. not even bc ur naked, it’s just a vulnerable way to see the person you love, and there’s nothing sexual in the way he’s looking at you.

- even when you tug on his neck to pull him down for a kiss, he’s just swooning over your affections.

- unless the implication, or intention of sex came before the shower…he’s probably not approaching anything with that.

- it’s a completely different story if you’ve had a ton of tension all day,

- constantly making passing remarks that make his palms sweat, but unable to go any further because of your busy day,

- and you leave him all hot and bothered until you come home in the evening, and ask him to join you in the shower.

- that’s when he forgets all about the little routine.

sam.

- ah, the start to ur most important routine.

- honestly, i feel like you were the one who started it all.

- the whole, “every time you shower, we shower together” thing.

- at least, that’s what it becomes once you move in together. but before that, anytime he was over & you needed to shower, he’d totally join in.

- it’s not even sexual. there’s only like a 30% chance you’ll end up having sex, or even just do foreplay whenever you shower together.

- he’s just so clingy, and he craves the closeness after he realized how much he enjoyed you being there the first time.

- you both were quietly laying together, watching the tv wordlessly, just enjoying each others company after you two decided he should spend the night.

- which then prompted in him asking, “do you think i could use the shower? i smell bad.” he frowns after taking a whiff of his arm.

- you giggle. “i think you smell good, but go ahead. i don’t have your soap, though.”

- like he could care lmfao.

- “thanks!” he just grins, hopping on his feet and giving you a little kiss on the forehead before he skips off.

- you give it like 5 minutes before you decide u miss him too much (attachment issues😞)

- “sam…y’think you got room for two in there?” you knock before creeping the door open.

- he peeks his shampoo’d head from behind the shower curtain. “you wanna come in?”

- “is that okay?”

- u might’ve just asked him to marry you.

- his whole face lights up, grinning wide and opening the curtain wider as he steps to the side. “the more the merrier!”

- he doesn’t even care ur naked. there’s nothing sexual running through his mind, he’s just excited you’re standing with him rn. now he doesn’t have to rush to go see you.

- he even steps to the side to give you the chance to soak your hair under the spray.

- it’s easily just a little awkward at first.

- you’ve had sex before, that’s not why it’s awkward,

- only because it’s the first time you two are seeing each other completely naked without any intention of sexual advancement. not that it would be such a burden if you did, but neither of you want to.

- while you drench your hair, he can’t help but smile lovingly at the sight of water droplets all over your skin.

- he could easily be thinking about how much fun it’d be to have sex right here, but he’s too focused on how this might actually be his favorite thing you’ve ever done together.

- like minutes of silence pass, nothing but the water running and he’ll just lean in and press a kiss on your temple or shoulder.

- it’s not bc he’s trying to hint at something,

- he just wanted to do it, and he doesn’t really overthink the things he wants to do.

- but the affection makes you smile, and by how pure it was, it doesn’t send any false messages.

- it really doesn’t last that long. probably about 15 minutes of you both washing off and short displays of affection.

- yet it clung to you both so well, that it just became the routine you never skipped out on.

shane.

- it definitely just happened naturally.

- ur relationship at first was strictly sexual.

- to the rest of the town, no one even knew you guys even spoke. which, to be fair, there wasn’t much talking between u two anyways💀💀

- but i wanna say that was only for a couple weeks.

- it was still super slow and progressive. your conversations went from short & passing, to getting to know each other a little more. but the sex was still there.

- it went from instead of him leaving right after you finished, you’d stay up and talk for a couple hours.

- to waking up together, to spending the day together, etc etc.

- now ur relationship was approaching friends w benefits category. except it was unspoken, but neither of you wanted to be friends at this point.

- despite all of this, you’ve still never showered together.

- until you spent the whole day working outside. you feel gross, sticky, and sweaty. he just so happened to stick around after you started working.

- ur checking in on your animals he just follows you lol.

- before u both knew it, the sun was coming down and he spent the whole day helping you.

- the thing was, neither of you wanted to mention it. you were both nervous even bringing it up would spark the implication of wanting him to leave.

- which was not the case.

- not to mention, he’s a huge help. when u passed him ur axe to chop down trees, you almost couldn’t look away 🤷‍♀️

- so after you’ve finished, sun starting to set and sweat dripping from your temples—he’s still standing with you.

- “i feel gross, i’m gonna shower.” you frown, plucking your clothes away from your sticky skin.

- ofc he’s thinking it.

- but he doesn’t have time to make a sly comment before you shoot one over your shoulder, “there’s room for two, y’know.”

- say no more, he’s following close behind you throwing off his shirt.

- “thought you said there was room for two, there’s hardly room for one.” he snorts, squeezing himself beside you in the cramped space.

- “oh c’mon, you’ve never had a problem with making it fit.”

- he’s gonna lose his mind.

- u don’t really waste any time LMFAO

- drenching your hair under the spray before you look over at him,

- and you both just lean in cus it’s unspoken, but obvious you guys aren’t in there just to shower.

- he’s quick to slotting his hands at the small of your back, while you wrap yours around his neck and press yourself against him.

- …not much showering gets done, i’ll just say that.

sebastian.

- i feel like sebastian spends more nights at your house then he does at his own at this point.

- he’s not the type to get super attached very easily, even getting to the step of sleeping together took a while.

- but after it happened, he found your little cottage so comfortable. he liked waking up to you in the morning, and falling asleep in your arms at night.

- the only reason he goes home is to work.

- and the minute he finishes up, he heads back over.

- honestly, if he could pack up his computer and leave it at your house, then he’d never leave—which is probably why you made it clear he can’t do that.

- your relationship is already committed.

- i don’t really think he’d wanna sleep with you if hadn’t discussed a romantic relationship.

- anyways, i feel like bc of this, he’s already showered at your place lol.

- you were too busy to ask, and he knew you wouldn’t mind, so he just jumped in and took a quick shower.

- hours after you already started your chores for the day, he woke up & just sniffed his shirt and winced a little.

- he also did some laundry (for your sake).

- so then it kinda just became a, “hey, do you mind if i take a quick shower?” while you were preoccupied.

- sometimes you’d be the one to ask. like if you were lying together, on your bed in your house, you’d turn to him and say the same thing.

- it never rly occurred to either of u that you could knock out two birds with one stone🤷‍♀️

- one evening you were exhausted. you smelled horrible, you could already tell. you had spent nearly the entire day down in the mines, just covered in dirt and rubble, stinking like sweat yet he still kissed you when you came in.

- “i need to shower,” you groan, still accepting his kiss.

- ugh but he’s already spent the majority of the day without you, why are you going to deprive him of more?

- “i think you smell fine,” he tries his best to persuade, but you won’t budge.

- pressing against his chest, you giggle, “you know that’s not true. i’ll only be a few minutes, promise.”

- he’s honestly so clingy, literally tugging on your arm as you try to walk away and following behind you like a lost puppy.

- and suddenly, “i could use a shower too…” despite him using it earlier.

- you look at him for a second, narrowing your eyes, before you tease, “yeah, you could.”

- he’s much like sam, just less openly enthusiastic.

- when you tell him to get the water running, he’s only nodding, but it’s not hard to miss the way he’s turning to start the water so quick.

- and how he’s undressing like he has somewhere to be, despite presenting so nonchalant about it.

- for him, it’s just a better reason to be so close to you. he likes when you’re around.

- it really depends on how much he was missing you, but for the most part i don’t think it ever leads to anything sexual.

- sure, he stands back to let you rinse yourself off and his eyes wander, but that’s about as much that’ll happen if neither of you are in the mood.

- and even then, if you end up wanting to have sex, it hardly ever happens in the shower. most is just foreplay.

- which he is never opposed to.

- i’ve said it once, i’ll say it a million more times,

- he lovesss fingering you.

- and lowkey, if you’re intending on having sex and starting with foreplay in the shower…phew.

- gently pressing you against the shower wall, the water running all down his back but he doesn’t even care,

- and his lips are making out with yours, which are sloppy in response while his fingers press against that spot inside of you that has your neck craning and moans spilling…

- that’s what he wants when he’s been missing you and joins you in the shower.

alex.

- i actually think he’s similar to sam too.

- he’s a huge fan of showering together.

- for starters, he’s the kind of man who makes himself at home very quickly💀💀

- even when you guys weren’t even dating yet, still just in that getting to know each other and hanging out regularly phase.

- when you’d plan for him to come over once you finished up work and spend time w each other casually.

- the cocky side of him just took your hospitality as flirting.

- which, i mean, isn’t unbelievably far off. you do like him.

- but it was probably like his second time over at your house, and he just casually asked if he could take a shower.

- you might’ve raised an eyebrow, but you still said sure.

- so then it became a pretty normal thing. he never took longer then 10 minutes, so you could appreciate that.

- after you both started dating, and had seen each other naked, it became much more casual.

- the transition between not showering together, to showering together was so subtle.

- it just started with you showering, and he needed to pee so he’d just come in and, well, pee.

- then he’d be showering but you still needed to brush your teeth and do your skincare, so you hung out in the bathroom.

- and pretty soon it was so normal that when you asked if he wanted to join you one evening—you didn’t even think much of it.

- it wasn’t until you were midway through washing your body when you realized he was doing the same thing beside you.

- it was just like a, ‘oh, okay, this is normal now’ kind of realization.

- “can you pass me the shampoo?” like he was asking for the salt at the dinner table.

- it just felt natural, especially after he moved in.

- it became a thing you both do together.

- literally a part of your nightly routine. when you were ready to shower, you’d let him know and he’d start the water while you got undressed.

- so since it was your nightly routine, i feel like the longer you’re together, showering together and having sex doesn’t really pair up.

- you shower 9/10 times together. there’s no way you’d be able to keep up (he can tho lol)

- but that doesn’t mean it’s rare.

- he loves looking at you when you’re naked. no shame.

- there could be zero sexual energy between you two at the moment, and he’s still looking you up and down, admiring.

- he can’t help it! he doesn’t even have to be turned on for his body to react to yours.

- “are you hard right now?” you laugh almost like you’re making fun of him.

- and his response will always be, “well duh,” because you just have that affect on him.

elliott.

- another man that loves to shower with you.

- well…yes he likes to shower together, but he’s definitely a bigger fan of bathing together.

- i’ll get to that in a minute.

- your relationship progressed very steadily. it wasn’t until after a few dates when you actually slept together.

- once you had sex though, i feel like it opened you up into being much more comfortable around each other.

- spending time constantly, always inviting him over, allowing him to see you in more vulnerable ways like in your pj’s or all dirty.

- he approached the idea first, i feel like.

- you’ve been having a stressful week, working nearly every hour you were awake, and you had complained about it prior.

- so he just wanted to help you relax, setting up a nice bath with candles and bath salts and anything to help you relax.

- he’s so sweet about it too, not even intending on joining you until you clasped your hands together and asked him to.

- “join me, please. i’ve hardly seen you all week.”

- and he’s all ears.

- sitting in the opposite end, either sitting in peaceful silence or listening to you recap your day.

- i lowkey think he’d bathe you LMFAO

- like hear me out, he’s offering to wash your hair and he’s all delicate with it, giving you a whole head massage and dipping a cup of water to rinse it out.

- kissing your neck and shoulders, pampering you while you don’t even care to protest.

- and even if you did, he wouldn’t allow it. not when you’re all he wants to focus on right now.

- and despite him loving to bathe with you, i feel like his shower routine is so intensive and meticulous that it’s not often you shower together.

- he never minds your company, i promise you that.

- i just firmly believe he’s a morning showerer and you don’t really have the time for that in the morning.

- if you were to ask for him to join you, i don’t think he’d turn you down. he’d just stand away from the spray and tie his hair back so it doesn’t get wet LOL

- but he’s all for spending as much time as he can get with you.

[thelonelyshore-if]

How did the ROs figure out their queerness?

Give us the thoughts king 👀 if its not spoilery of course

Ahhhh thank you both so much I love love love thinking about this. The ROs mean so much to me and I love thinking about them as people, with all of the experiences that comes with it. Answering below the cut because this is gonna be an essay <3

Beck - ever since Beck was little they knew that sometimes they felt like a boy and sometimes they felt like a girl and sometimes both or neither or something else entirely...but they also didn't fully realize that not everyone felt that way. If her sister got mad at her for stealing & wearing her clothes it was because her sister was mean, not because she was 'supposed to be' something else. If her parents got on their case for not conforming; well, their parents were always on their case. Not anything different when it was because they caught them kissing a boy. It wasn't really until late middle school that Beck fully understood that they were different.

To this day they don't really have the words to describe their gender. They just know it changes, and they do what they can to broadcast that to the people around them. Most people don't get him, but that's nothing new. His sexuality is even more complex too describe in exact words, for him, but he knows he's been attracted to all sorts of people. Queer fits, and he doesn't really feel the need to try to define it further than that.

Croft- unlike all of the other ROs, Croft is from modern day and unquestionably grew up on tumblr lmao. They are very knowledgeable about the spectrum of gender and sexuality. Unfortunately how they figured out that they're trans is a spoiler (it's a story that will be much more fun to read in game lol), but they figured out that they're on the ace spectrum in high school. All of their friends were obsessed with dating and sex and they thought they'd lost their minds. And then eventually (after answering one too many "who do you have a crush on???" questions) they went. Wait a second maybe I'm one one who's different here.

In college, though, they fell desperately and unquestionably in love with their only long term partner to date. She was mysterious and beautiful and a self-described witch...and one of their best friends. Croft was obsessed and realized that maybe they aren't actually fully asexual. Clearly there's the potential for attraction, if they're connected enough to someone. So they mentally adjusted the label they use to demisexual and went on their merry way.

F!Jay- gotta split Jay up because it deeply depends on their gender. But, as I think I've mentioned before, when f!Jay and Yasmin were younger teenagers they had a classic homoerotic teenage best friendship going on. Jay had a massive crush on Yas, they cuddled and held hands all the time, they were each other's first kiss (to ~practice~ ofc). And it was all totally platonic, because they were both girls!!!

Spoiler alert: it wasn't. When Yasmin and Seth started dating Jay felt weirdly jealous and brokenhearted. She talked to her mom about it, and Grace was just like. Honey. Baby girl. And Jay was like but I don't even like girls like that!!! She was in denial for a bit until she joined the co-ed baseball team, realized she spent a bit too long admiring all of her teammates in a way that definitely wasn't platonic, and then went. Oh. Huh.

M!Jay- he really doesn't think about this sort of thing the same way his female counterpart does. Jay is a pretty damn emotionally intelligent guy...but he doesn't really do introspection all that well. So his own path to self discovery was a lot more like. Damn my teammates have nice form. And look great in their baseball pants. And then proceeded to not really think all that deeply about it until he was (unknowingly) fawning over how good one of their male teammates looked and Seth was just like........."bro I love u no matter what you can tell me if you're gay."

And Jay was just silently like. What the hell do you mean I had a crush on your girlfriend for years. And out loud was just like. "I just respect him as a player I don't think he's hot." And Seth said "..........ok." Then Jay went home and thought about it longer and also went. Oh. Huh.

Perri- when it comes to their sexuality, Perri has always kind of suspected? They fall a little bit in love with everybody. Especially people who are nice to them. Not in a way where they assume people are flirting. In fact, Perri doesn't think they've ever been flirted with. No way. They're too awkward and weird. (Perri needs better self confidence). But people are just so pretty, and funny and sweet and interesting...and gender has never really been a limiting factor on that. They really figured it out definitively in middle school, though it took them until high school to actually put it into words and tell other people about being queer.

For Nonbinary!Perri, their gender journey was significantly more complicated than figuring out their sexuality. They tried on a couple of different identities and labels throughout their later middle school years. Having Beck as a best friend kind of made them actually think about their gender and how unhappy they were being seen as their assigned gender. They wondered if maybe they were just the opposite gender and were trans, but that made their skin crawl in the same way. They didn't want to be defined as anything, really. Just themself. So eventually they just figured that their gender is as queer as their sexuality and left it at that.

Ravi- okay so. I can't say a lot about Ravi because of spoilers. Which I'm very sorry about. BUT what I can say is that, for a long time, he figured he had to be gay. He had a boyfriend he loved, after all. If he's a guy attracted to other guys, then there isn't really any other option...right? Even if he noticed girls & other people the exact same way as he did most other boys. It wasn't the same as the heart-pounding, life-ending near obsession he felt for the boy he loved.

After his ex died, Ravi settled on the fact that he'd never fall in love again. (The man has a big storm coming). It wasn't until chatting with Jay and Yasmin about their own queerness that he realized that being bisexual was even an option. He felt kind of silly, after that. Of course it was. He quietly adopted the label and went about his day. It isn't like it matters, since he'll never date anyone else ever again ;)

Yasmin- probably had the easiest time of figuring herself out, save for maybe Croft. Yasmin is, if nothing else, deeply self-confident. She understands herself in a way few other people really do. She's known since she was little that she liked girls as well as boys. She has a distinct memory of telling her parents that she was going to marry Princess Jasmin someday. Her parents acted weridly concerned, until Yasmin clarified that it meant she'd have a pet tiger. They didn't realize that the 'marry a princess' part was just as important as the 'pet tiger' part.

As she grew older she understood that her attraction wasn't really limited to gender...but she still assumed she'd probably marry a man. It's still Easthaven, after all. Plus her parents weren't...the most accepting people in the world.

If Jay is a woman they had their 'friendship', and it made Yasmin blush and her heart beat faster, but she never really thought much of it. Yas is much more comfortable in her sexuality now--in the sense that she's not afraid of what the town would think if she dated a woman or nonbinary person--but...she's in a similar boat as Ravi. Never gonna have another long-term relationship, so it isn't really an issue? At least, that's what she thinks ;)

[lemedstudent2021]

hiiiiiii :)

so i'm writing some fanfic where the characters get into a plane crash and have to survive on their own with limited medical supplies/knowledge (the characters are age 12-15 but some of them have first aid knowledge to an extent) and i have some Questions (if u don't mind me asking)

(before i start this is SHAMELESSLY inspired by the greys anatomy season 8 finale where the plane crashes)

can you use fire to cauterise open wounds to stop bleeding? or would that just bring further complications?

can you use safety pins as makeshift staples (if you loop them so the skin shuts properly)

the only character who knows how to properly suture needs sutures to stop bleeding out, is it realistic for him to instruct the two other least injured people to suture him up (he can't use his hands) without blacking out from pain?

injuries the characters have: (what is the treatment protocol for each of these?)

one character gets her leg broken with bone exposed (eventually it has to be amputated)

one dislocates his shoulder

one person's hand gets stuck in the debris

someone gets debris in her stomach

one person just has superficial wounds

one character gets debris stuck in her leg

they all have heavy bruising and scrapes as well but those are treatable

things the characters do know how to do:

tie a makeshift tourniquet (advice: do not practise tying tourniquets on yourself because it's quite painful)

suture (one person)

insert a needle into someone's veins (same person)

apply compression bandages to stop bleeding

other super basic stuff (apply plasters, tie an arm sling, etc)

the very basics of cauterising a wound

supplies they have:

tranquiliser guns (limited, and the tranq guns are suited to taking down dinosaurs but they work on humans too)

hand sanitiser and rubbing alcohol (limited)

two basic first aid kits with needle and thread

a knife

cloth to use as bandages and tourniquet material

oxygen (from the plane)

possibly an iv drip???

matchsticks (limited) to make fire to sterilise things and to heat the knife for cauterisation

debris from the plane for splints

food and water (limited)

also how does one put a dislocated joint back into its socket? particularly the shoulder?

sorry if this is super long and for asking so many questions lol. feel free to answer whenever :) and it's completely fine if u don't know (duh) i can research myself but i am sure you're more accurate than a search engine

hope u are having a wonderful day <3

beloved hiiii :D

oooh exciting!! ngl i havent watched any medical shows lol so i dont have any pop culture knowledge (the writing in said shows isnt always the most accurate as u probably already know lol) BUTT tis a famous trope/ au setting so lets see what we got >:)

(also ofc??? love answering ur questions and stuff in general!! and if i dont anything we can always learn together XD)

disclaimer i will be freestyling these okay i dont have any experience in trauma surgery lol but heres what i do got right off the bat:

--

aight first off cauterisation is indeed used to stop severe bleeding *when all other means have been used* and an open flame is definately not the way to go for tha (burns can be extremely dangerous and a. cause fluid loss and b. increase the risk for nasty infections that can lead to sepsis and death)

instead id suggest heating up metal (like a scrap from the aircraft or sum) via the fire and then applying it to the wound :3

--

assuming u mean the surgical staples: yes and no? lol obv since this is an emergency there is little space to be picky abt equipment, so honestly safety pins would work ig but i think theyd keep coming loose (oh the agony)

i messed around with one of mine just now and the line that locks into the head (?) is pretty straight so i kinda doubt itll be able to like close flesh the way one imagines it to but its literally fiction lol we can suspend our belief far more than this. as long as its closed properly go for it lmao i give u my blessing XD

--

yeah sure!! since the patient is awake and aware enough to be able to assess and give instruction i see no reason as to why not lol.

btw in case of an amputation or extremely severe bleeding id recommend using a tourniquet (lots of tutorials online!) to compress the artery and minimise the bleeding :D (ooh maybe u can use the cautery thing here too)

--

OMG I READ THE FUTURE AHA (my condolences) okay so the amputation will be at the knee level (which afaik is the hardest kind of amputation to perform joint wise lmao. good luck with that) presumably. theyll need a tourniquette as mentioned above, very sharp knife or something to hack away at the flesh and tendons (very tough) and ligaments around the knee socket (even tougher i think). and lots of bandages for the stump

now had they recieived the needed medical attention i doubt theyd need to go up to the knee (there are shin level amputations) but since theyre kids and all alone with no guide or anything idk if theyll be able to save the lower leg bones or even cut though them if they could (i doubt med supplies include saws lol) so yeah thats my reasoning at least.

--

dislocation is a relatively easy fix (compared to everyhting else lol) but it depends on where the humerus (arm bone) is:

based on which kind of dislocation the direction of pull is determined, but again relatively simple no blood no mess

there are a few maneuvers/ techniques u might want to look up like hippocratic and spaso/ reverse stimson (both for anterior btw)

--

a hand getting stuck i assume means impaled? oof thats going to hurt. well broken hand bones are pretty rough to deal with in the wild, since all bones need proper realignment to avoid further pain and complications when the body heals itself (did u know that if a fracture heals wrong they have to break it and reset it? yeah.) so im not sure honestly ig it depends on what u have in mind for them

again not too sure what stomach means exactly; are her guts poking out? just bleeding from scratches? depends on what ur going for!! lmk btw and feel free to send more asks ill look up and find what we need to know :D

impaled leg i take it? as the above u need to know what condition shes in exactly like arterial puncture probably means severe bleeding and death honestly, lmk what u have in mind!!

--

superficial wounds need cleaning and patching up, sometimes if theres like unclean areas of said wounds they need to be scraped off (debridement) esp if theres like scraps or dirt or anything on the wound. what fun!

again for the cautery i think an open flame would heat up the knife much faster than a match lol (also they need to be preserved. also also they wouldnt last long enough i think)

not at all pookie i had so much fun going over everything!! hopefully this is coherent and useful for u ajsdhsjjdhfn

[vernons-girl]

hi! yeah um i.. read ur newest fic 'not her' with kmg and i kind of wanted to add a continuation to that...? (only if u want to ofc!)

so basically reader got her heart broken by mingyu and her sister, soooo she goes on and vents her feelings and how heart broken she is to another one of her pals, seungcheol (without knowing seungcheol likes reader) so he comforts her and u can probably add the ending (fluff or angst or anything!)

im sorry this is too long.. i rlly tried to make it shorter lmao (btw i LUV ur fics so much)

not her | kim mingyu - choi seungcheol pt.2

PART 1 ; PART 2 ; PART 3 (final)

angst, fluff,wc:2.5k

taglist: @gaslysainz ; @graybaeismytae ; @mansaaay

a/n: did i completely put mingyu aside in this part? yes. will i make a part three where we really dive into the drama with everyone kdrama love triangle way? you guys tell me hehe

You couldn't bear looking at the scene that was unfolding in front of your eyes so you gathered your stuff in a hurry and left, completely forgetting the idea of shopping for a new outfit.

You made it home in record time. Rushing to lock yourself in your room once you made it through the door.

Mingyu choosing someone else than you was one thing, but your sister going behind your back to betray you, after you had confided in her? That was a whole other thing.

You couldn't help but cry as soon as you found yourself alone in the comfort of your room. You were feeling too many things at the same time and couldn't quite pinpoint why you were crying. Was it the pain? The anger? The disappointment? The heartbreak? Maybe it was all of it at once.

You couldn't bare the idea of having to face any of them about the issue right now, let alone having to see your sister when she would get back home, so you did the first thing that came to mind : you packed an overnight bag, texted your most trustful friend and headed over to his place.

You reached Seungcheol's place about an hour after you had texted him. You hadn't told him much over text, actually you hadn't told him anything besides 'can i come spend the night?' to which he agreed, of course, he didn't need to know why you needed to spend the night over at his place when you had a perfectly decent bed of your own, he just agreed without any further questions.

He greeted you at the door with a worried look on his face that he couldn't conceal no matter how hard he tried. You've confided in him before, but never did it feel so worrying. Without a second thought, he pulled you inside with a hug. The action broke down all the walls you had tried to build on your way there instantly. You felt as if you were falling apart in his arms, melting in his embrace perhaps, and you let the tears stream down your face, not caring about the embarrassing whines coming out of your mouth as you did so. He didn't seem to care either. Because all he did was hold you, closely, firmly but carefully, rubbing soothing circles on your back, shushing you like one would do with a baby. But it all felt so right amongst all the chaos around you that you let yourself be in the moment, until he pulled you straight on your feet to lead you to the living room, "Come on, let's talk about this around a warm drink, yeah?" he said, trying his best to show off a reassuring smile.

You obliged and sat down on the couch as Seungcheol got some snacks ready along with something to drink. In the meantime you allowed yourself to relax, sunking down onto the couch wishing it could somehow swallow you whole.

Thankfully, Seungcheol joined you pretty quickly so you didn't have the time to get lost in your thoughts once again. You straightened up to grab the cup he was handing out to you from the tray he had placed on the coffee table in front of you.

"Sooooo..." Seungcheol started, he didn't want to push you into it but he still needed to at least have an idea of what was going on.

You took a sip of your drink followed by a deep breath.

"So... I had a crush on this guy, and I genuinely thought that he could like me, you know?" you tried to hold back the tears that threatened to spill from your eyes once again.

"And I wasn't the only one thinking this.. my sister thought so too." Seungcheol now had a curious look and urged you to keep going.

"I was supposed to meet up with him in a few days and I really wanted to confess, I really did." this time, the tears fell from your eyes, you couldn't help it, it was so fresh, so hard, your body needed to express this unbearable inner pain it was feeling.

Seungcheol offered some comfort with his free hand coming to rub up and down your arm, "We don't have to talk about it any more if you don't feel like it," he reassured you.

"No, it's okay, you affirmed, so, you started again, I wanted to make things right, I wanted to impress him, to make him like me any more than he might already do, so I went to the mall to do some shopping, a sob escaped from your dry lips, but then I saw them, him, her" you sniffled, letting out shaky breaths in an attempt to calm yourself down.

"Them ? Him? Her?" Seungcheol asked.

"My crush and my sister" you finally said, your heart breaking a little more. The look on your friend's face changed to... confusion?

"Wait so you saw your sister with your crush at the mall? What about it?

- They were kissing, Seungcheol. Kissing."

Upon hearing this last word, his expression morphed to anger in a matter of seconds.

"What the fuck?!" he suddenly exclaimed, almost slamming his mug down onto the table.

"She kissed him knowing you liked him? This is so twisted. I can't believe it." He let out in disbelief, rubbing a hand down his face.

"And he didn't tell me either. He never told me he was seeing someone. What if she told him about my crush on him and they both fucked me over? you put your face in both on your hands, crying softly, What am I supposed to do now Seungcheol?" you questioned desperately, almost pleading him for an answer.

He leaned back in his seat, looking up in thought.

"Who is he?" he finally asked.

"Who's who?" okay maybe it wasn't the best idea to play dumb, but how could you tell him that Mingyu, your friend who also happens to be one of Seungcheol's, broke your heart ?

"The guy, he said firmly, who's the guy?" ok so now he wasn't playing. You've never seen him look this serious before, the concern and anger still obvious on his face.

You took a deep breath, preparing yourself for the worst when you breathed out : "Mingyu."

He clenched his fists upon hearing the name leave your shaky lips. As a matter of fact, his whole body tensed.

"So you saw Mingyu kissing your sister who knew you liked Mingyu ?" he summarized.

"Yeah.." you confirmed, your gaze lingering on the floor, the carpet curiously looking much more interesting than you friend who was sitting across from you.

"Does she know ? he asked

-Mh?

-Your sister. Does she know you saw them ?

-No, they didn't see me and I came over before she got home, so we didn't talk about it.

-And do you think he knew?

-Knew what ?

-That you liked him ?

-I don't know.. I don't think so, you reasoned, he would never be so cruel. you affirmed

-Yeah, you're probably right.." Seungcheol agreed, even though he wanted nothing but to punch his dear friend in the face for hurting you, he also knew it wasn't his style to hurt people's feelings. I mean this guy literally apologized to his last girlfriend for breaking up with her so of course he wasn't going to hurt one of his closest friends.

Seungcheol sighed deeply, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "This is a messed up situation, no doubt about it," he muttered, his expression reflecting a mixture of concern and anger.

You nodded, feeling a bit of relief knowing Seungcheol was there to listen, even if he couldn't magically fix everything. It was nice knowing there was at least one person you could trust in this whole mess.

After a moment of silence, Seungcheol leaned forward, taking both of your hands in his, his eyes fixed on you. "Listen, I know it hurts like hell right now, but you're stronger than this. I'm not going to tell you to not think about it because I know it feels impossible right now but you need to focus on yourself, okay ?

- Yeah.. you replied.

- What do you need right now?"

You thought for a moment, wiping away the tears that still lingered. "I just... I need some time to figure things out. Away from all of this," you said, gesturing vaguely around you.

Seungcheol nodded in understanding. "Alright. I get it. You can stay here as long as you need. I'll be here for you, okay?"

You managed a weak smile, feeling a sliver of hope, "Thank you, Seungcheol. I don't know what I'd do without you."

He smiled back, a reassuring presence in the middle of all of this turmoil. "You don't have to figure it all out right now. Just take it one step at a time. And remember, you're not alone in this." he finally said, giving your hands a reassuring squeeze.

And as you glanced over at Seungcheol, you couldn't help but feel a flutter in your chest, realizing just how much he truly cared for you. Perhaps, in the midst of all this chaos, there was a silver lining after all—a silver lining named Seungcheol.

"Come on, let's get you settled in bed, yeah?" he said, standing up and offering his hand out for you to take. You did so and followed him down the hallway.

As Seungcheol led you to the spare bedroom where you would be spending the night, he couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions swirling inside him. On one hand, he was glad to be able to offer you a comfortable place to rest after everything you'd been through. But on the other hand, he couldn't shake the pang of jealousy he felt at the thought of you sleeping under the same roof in a bed that wasn't his.

As he pulled back the covers and fluffed the pillows, he tried to push aside those selfish thoughts. After all, what mattered most was that you were safe and comfortable. But as he glanced over at you, he couldn't help but notice how beautiful you looked in the soft light of the bedside lamp, your eyes heavy with exhaustion yet still so full of resilience.

"Here you go," he said, gesturing to the bed. "I hope you'll be comfortable here."

You offered him a grateful smile as you sank down onto the mattress, letting out a contented sigh. "Thank you, Seungcheol. I really appreciate it."

He returned your smile, trying to ignore the way his heart skipped a beat at the sound of your voice. "Of course. Anything for you."

As he turned to leave the room, he couldn't help but linger for a moment, his gaze lingering on your sleeping form. In that moment, he realized just how much he cared about you—more than just a friend, more than just a crush. And as he quietly closed the door behind him, he made a silent promise to himself to always be there for you, no matter what.

As you settled into the comfortable bed Seungcheol had prepared for you, your mind started to buzz with thoughts of the events that had unfolded earlier. Despite your exhaustion, sleep eluded you as you thought about your sister's and Mingyu's betrayal. A notification from your phone interrupted your thoughts, a message from your sister asking where I was, seemingly worried as to what you were up to. Against you better judgment, you decided to ignore it for the moment as you let out a heavy sigh and turned your attention to Seungcheol.

He had been so kind and supportive throughout the evening, offering you a safe haven and a shoulder to lean on. His actions spoke volumes, and somehow you couldn't help but wonder if there was something more behind his gestures. The way he looked at you, the tenderness in his voice—it all hinted at a deeper connection between you. And as you drifted off into a restless sleep, you couldn't shake the feeling that perhaps Seungcheol's feelings for you ran deeper than mere friendship.

After ensuring that the spare bedroom was tidy and comfortable for you, Seungcheol made my way to the living room to clean up the mess from earlier. As he picked up discarded snack wrappers and empty mugs, his mind also ended up wandering to the events of the evening.

He couldn't shake the anger and frustration he felt towards Mingyu for hurting you, someone he cared deeply about. And yet, amidst the chaos, he couldn't deny the flutter of hope that sparked within him at the thought of being there for you, of being the one you turned to in her time of need.

As he finished cleaning up, he reached for his phone and sent a quick text to Mingyu, his fingers hesitating over the keys. Despite his anger towards him, a part of him couldn't help but wonder if this was his chance to finally confess his feelings to you. But as he stared at the blank screen, he couldn't bring myself to send the message. Instead, he pocketed his phone and made his way back to the spare bedroom, his heart heavy with uncertainty and longing.

As Seungcheol lay in bed, the weight of the evening's events heavy on his mind, he couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to the situation than met the eye.

As he mulled over the possibilities, a nagging thought tugged at the corners of his mind. What if Mingyu wasn't entirely clueless about your feelings? What if, somehow, he had sensed your affection for him, even if you hadn't explicitly confessed it?

The idea seemed far-fetched at first, but the more Seungcheol thought about it, the more it made sense. Mingyu was perceptive, after all, and he had always been attentive to the people around him. Perhaps he had noticed the subtle glances, the lingering touches, the way your face lit up whenever you were near him.

But if Mingyu was aware of your feelings, why would he pursue a relationship with your sister? Was it out of genuine interest, or was there something more sinister at play? Seungcheol couldn't shake the feeling that there was a piece of the puzzle missing, something lurking beneath the surface that he couldn't quite grasp.

As he drifted off to sleep, his mind buzzing with unanswered questions, Seungcheol's thoughts inevitably turned to you. Despite the troubles of the evening, one thing remained clear: his feelings for you ran deep. With each passing moment, his love for you only seemed to grow stronger, anchoring him amidst the storm of uncertainty.

As he vowed to uncover the truth about Mingyu's intentions, Seungcheol's resolve was fueled not only by a sense of justice for you but also by a burning desire to protect you from further harm. For he knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that he would do anything to ensure your happiness, even if it meant confronting his own heartache in the process.

With that thought in mind, Seungcheol closed his eyes, feeling a sense of determination wash over him. Whatever challenges lay ahead, he would face them head-on, armed with nothing but his unwavering love for you. And as sleep finally claimed him, he couldn't help but cling to the hope that, somehow, everything would turn out alright in the end.

[graciegoeskrazy]

somebody else

george daniel + xcx!stepdaughter!teen!reader

(ft charli, gabbriette, and matty!)

warnings: cursing, daddy issues, bio dad comes back, king george, charli is a queen

a/n: ty anon who requested this and dug an old idea out of the trash lmao. hope u enjoy! i’m really proud of this one actually tehehe.

“Y/n, what time do you get out of practice today?” George asked, packing your lunch.

You stared at your phone with a blank expression, reading the texts you had received through the night.

“Y/n?” George called again when there was no response. “Hellooooo? Earth to y/n??” George teased.

Your head snapped up and your eyes widened in realization. “Sorry, I, uh- I get out at 5:30,” You tried to play it off with a laugh, immediately looking back down the texts.

“You okay?” George sensed something was off.

“Yeah, fine. Got to go,” You stood from the bar stool and grabbed your things, including the luch george had packed that was lying on the counter. You brushed it off quickly, trying to evade further questions.

“Wait a minute- what was that?” George persisted, concerned.

“Nothing, George! I’m fine, I got to go to school,” You placed a kiss on his cheek, standing on your tip toes, before you turned to your mom who was walking in from the bedroom she and George shared. “Bye, mom!” You said, rushing out the door.

“Bye, darling,” Charli said, walking out in her pjs and bedhead

With that you slammed the door and headed off the school. Charli laughed at the look stuck on her fiance’s face and kissed hm and she wrapped her arms around her torso. “What’s wrong?” She asked.

“Nothing, I guess. She’s just acting weird. Staring at her phone,” He said, trying to downplay her worries.

She smiled. “That’s what teenagers do, George…” she added, trying to reassure him.

He shrugged as he cleaned up the mess from packing her lunch. “Have you noticed she’s acting differently?” George pressed on, sensing there was more beneath the surface.

“What do you mean?” She asked.

“I don’t know-“ George hesitated, searching for the right words.

“Yes, you do,” George looked up with a look. Charli tilted her head and smiled.

He continued. “Quieter. Not the chipper, happy girl we know and love?”

Charli got serious. “I mean, yeah, but I had just chalked it up to hormones,” She admitted, realizing she couldn’t ignore the signs any longer.

“Hm,” George said, looking down.

His other hand sensed the concern on his face. “She’ll come around. Whatever is happening, our girl is stronger than it. She’ll be fine,”

“Yeah,” George agreed, though his worry still lingered.

“Our girl,” He whispered and smiled.

…

You did your best to avoid the texts on your phone. He was up to his nose in nonsense again and it was starting to get to you, even more than usual. For the first week or so, he was respectful. You set boundaries, never promised to see him in person, and he agreed. Over time he got more abrupt. He would message you constantly, saying ‘hey’ or ‘sorry’ or ‘please forgive me’ or other stupid shit. Eventually, when you didn't reply he would curse you out. He would make threats and call you names, proof of the real him. You would cry and fight the urge to scream in the school bathroom. A stark contrast to the life you lived at home and school. You were a model student with a combination of popularity and straight A’s. A nice nepo baby who was a good friend to everyone and a joy to be around. Nobody knew of the dark past that you lived through.

Your ‘dad’, if you can even call him that, caused trouble from the beginning. Your mom and him were in love for a long time, but when you came along and Charli was ready to live a family life along with her career, despise your expectancy, your dad backed out and left. Charli begged and pleaded for years, but to no avail. Your early childhood memories include vivid glimpses of him from the times he did try and come around, but he always chose different things over you. The last time he tried was nearly 5 years ago. You were 10. You were excited when your mom said he wanted to see you again, You were excited to be like the other kids at school and have 2 parents, but that was a short-lived dream. He left after a while, completely ghosting you and your mom.

A message popped up on your Instagram account a couple of weeks ago. Usually, the messages you get are from XCX or 75 fans who want to connect to you to get closer to George or your Mum, so you ignore them at first glance. That was until you saw the name. His name. He said he wanted to talk and and gave you his number, You reached out. He said all he wanted to do was relay a message - he was doing good, he hoped you were doing good, he was in a better, more stable place, he would like to talk or even meet but there was no pressure.

And like a fool, you fell for it.

…

Gabbriette promised to pick you up from school and take you out to ‘start of spring break right’. She had known you for years, being friends with your mom, and had become somewhat of an aunt, so when she and Matty fell in love and started dating, it was nothing short of perfect. She took you to your favorite spot the two of you shared, then to a shop or two, eventually meeting up with Matty who said he wanted to meet the two of you for dinner.

You took a picture of the delectable pate in front of you with the couple just behind, capturing the warmth of the moment with a pink heart emoji and posted it without a second thought.

After a delightful dinner, filled with laughter and shared stories, you all headed back to your parents’ place. Charli suggested a game night of ‘Cards Against Humanity’, and that’s how the five of you ended up gathered around the coffee table in the living room, ready for a night of fun and friendly competition. After a good hour of laughter and drinking, a knock sounded at the door.

“Who’s that?” Charli asked, looking at George.

“I wasn't expecting anyone?” he said. George looked at you expectantly but you just shrugged, oblivious as to who was on the other side of the door.

The laughter continued as Matyt placed another card down and your mom went to answer the door.

“Y/n, can you go to your room for a second?” She stayed staring through the peep hole in the door.

“Why?” You stood up and gave her a confused look, snacking on the sucker Gabbriette got you earlier that day.

She turned to you, a serious look on your face as she sent a pleading look to her friend. “Just do it for me, please? Gab? Can you go with her?”

She put a reassuring hand on your back as she guided you upstairs. The last thing you saw was George running to Charli’s side at the door.

…

Once upstairs and inside, Gabby closed the door behind her and told you to sit on the bed. “What was that about? Who’s there?” You asked.

You could tell that she knew something was up, but was trying to downplay it for your sake. “I don’t know! Don’t worry about it. She's probably being dramatic about something.”

You rolled your eyes. “Gabby, my mother loves attention but she is not dramatic.”

A knock sounded at your door. “Hiiii.” Matty poked his head through the door before fully making his way though.

“What's happening?” You asked, fear evident in your tone.

He shrugged and smiled, clearly hiding something. “Nothing. It was just a sketchy guy at the door.” He smiled.

You crossed your arms. “You liar.” You tried to get passed him and make your way to the door.

He put his arms on your shoulders to stop you from passing. ‘Hey! I’m not lying.” He technically wasn’t. You didn't believe it though.

“Yeah, sure, leave the acting to your parents.” You laughed and pushed past him and through the door.

As much as he wanted to laugh, his anxiety grew as he watched you brush pass him with ease and walk downstairs. “Y/n wait.”

Charli was face to face with a man, someone you recognized. Anger was written all over her face. “For the 5th and final time, get out.” George was hovering behind her, strong and protective Even though he never said a word.

“I’ve come to talk, just to talk.” He said.

Before your mother could get another chance to speak the steps beneath you creaked, giving your position away. All 3 heads turned to you, silent. Eventually, a voice spoke up.

“Hi, my love.” He said, hesitantly.

“Hi, Justin.” you softly said.

The man’s man was Justin Lemoine. He was your biological father.

He had been in and out since the moment you were born. You thought he was gone forever when he left nearly 5 ago and never came back. The slowly but surely growing relationship the two of you were building vanished instantly when he told your mother he couldn't do it again. You were 10 years old then, but now you were almost 15.

Then you were innocent and naive, now you were a young woman who was more certain of who you were, what you wanted, and the life you wanted to live. And that life didn’t include Justin.

He was always ‘Justin’, never ‘Dad’ or ‘Papa’, or anything like that. That space was reserved for someone else. Someone like George.

He tried to take a step toward you but you shook your head, letting him know to take a step back. “I came to talk to you real quick-”

“I don't want to talk to you.” You flatly said.

“C’mon, don't be like that.”

“They told you not to come over here.” He knew the ‘they’ you were referring to was the court and the agreement

“I know, I-”

“Then why are you here?”

“I wanted to talk to you. I’ve been meaning to stop by since-”

“Since the last time you saw me?” You took a small step towards him, telling him you were serious.

He sighed and gave a solemn look. “Yeah.”

“So 5 years. Right?” It was said more mater-of-fact rather than a question.

‘Y/n.” He started his stint of trying to reason with you. You interrupted before he got the chance.

“No, I’m right, right? It's been 5 years since you’ve seen me? End of 2019, correct?”

He sighed again, starting to back down just the slightest bit. “Yeah.”

You let out a hum and you crossed your arms. George and Charli watched from behind, in awe of your spirit. “So what was it? Lots of wrong turns?”

His gaze shifted downwards. “Something like that.” It was almost as if he was ashamed. It was as if he was being genuine and serious this time. It felt like he really wanted to try again.

That thought only lasted a second before reality snuck back in. A beautiful simple guess of ‘what could be’ was loss in an instant. The reality was conversations like this between you and him have happened one too many times. The reality was taking the alternate suggested route would only lead to disaster and chaos, again. You had your answer, your envisioned future, at that future did not include him.

You stood stoic and strong. “You can leave now.”

He tried to move forward to you. “Listen, y/n, I just-”

“You said you wanted to talk…we talked. So, you can leave now.”

He sighed again. “I want you to give me another chance, baby girl-”

“Don’t call me that.” You were getting heated and angry which you knew would not end well, especially for him. You had your mother's ferocity and fiery nature, and it wasn't something to be messed with.

“C’mon don’t be like that I can-”

“I gave you another chance. Multiple. 5 years ago.”

You swallowed and stayed silent, unsure of what to do next. You had already made your next move.

“Leave.”

He sighed and tried to reach out to you. “Y/n, I’m-”

“Leave right now or I swear to god the next time you come and bother me or my family again it won't be pretty.” You stared at him with fire in your eyes.

He let out a soft chuckle. “‘Family’, huh?”

You nodded.

“You think you can just choose? Do you think you can pick a couple of people, and call them your aunts and uncles? Let them take you out to Central Park for a day?” You tilted your head before you relized he was alluding to the post you had made with Gabby earlier that day, “Or your Dad? You think that man is your Father?” He gestured to George for the first time. You could hear shifting in the background and George sighing, You assumed he was about to make a move, but Charli stretched an arm to block him and you spoke before he got a chance. “He's been more of a Dad to me in the past 3 years than you have in my entire lifetime.”

And every ounce of fire that George had inside him, wanting to go and punch that prick of a man in the face, was extinguished by your words. George sighed and Charli grabbed his hand, squeezing it.

Justin, meanwhile, was speechless. You had really replaced him. “Leave, Justin.” You said, without any room for question. He left, slamming the door behind him.

It was quiet for a solid 5 seconds before anyone spoke. You broke the silence. “I'm going to bed.”

Charli reached out to you. “Baby-”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” You looked back and smiled.

You went upstairs and closed the door with a slam, continuing to sob into your pillows for the next hour.

…

Sleep eventually consumed you. Matty and Gabbriette left shortly after the fight and George and your Mum agreed to figure out the next steps tomorrow, knowing you were safe with them and believing Justin wouldn't make any more moves. When you woke up the clock on your phone read 2:15. You knew sleep wasn;t an option at this point so you got up and headed to the kitchen. You sat on the stool, to tired to move, to weary to make tea, so you just sat there. That was until you heard the footsteps coming from the hallway. It was George, half asleep. Your eyebrow twitched as he yawned and headed to you. He didnt say a word, just placed a kiss on your head before heading to the other side of the counter to make your favorite tea. A hit on deja vu creeping up as the two of you resembled the same positions as this morning.

You broke the silence after a minute. “What are you doing up?”

He shrugged as he continued his work.“Couldn’t sleep.” He slid the mug across the counter, along with a small container of honey.

“Thanks.” You softly said.

He watched as you finished making your drink. Your eyes were puffy, a sign you’ve been crying, along with the dark undereye circles that have been growing darker and darker over the past few weeks. All the signs he's seen and evidence he's gathered were now starting to make sense. “You okay?” He asked.

“Fine.” You said not looking up from your drink.

“You sure?” he asked, pushing you ever-so-slightly.

You sighed and shrugged, “I’ve been better I guess.” tears started to fall for what felt like the millionth time.

George rushed around the other side, wanting nothing more than to wrap you in his arms. “Hey- It's okay, it’s okay.”

You stayed quiet for a minute before talking though your hiccuped sobs.“I should’ve known he would come, I’m sorry.”

He tucked your head under his chin as you sobbed into him. “You don’t need to apologize, love. How would you’ve known?”

“Because he said he would!” Yous aid breaking away.

“What?” George asked, confused.

You sighed and pulled out your phone, opening the message up and laying it on the counter for george to lok at as you buried your head in your hands.

He hesitantly took the phone and started scrolling. It wasn’t long before angered built inside of him. “How long has this been happening for?”

You spoke through the sobs. “…I don’t kno-“

“Y/n.” He got serious and protective.

You sighed. “About a month…or two.”

Tension hung heavy in the air as you finally confessed

“Why didn’t you tell us?” George’s voice trembled with concern.

“Because everything was so perfect! Our family was fine, and I didn’t want this coming in and messing it up!” your words spilled out, laden with frustration. “That’s what he does. That’s what he’s always done,”

George hugged you again and you sighed into him. “I will get this sorted out. You won’t have to talk to this man again…if you don’t want to, of course-”

“I don’t want to talk to him,” your response was firm.

“Okay,” George breathed a sigh of relief. He could tell something else was bothering you, another thing eating away at your mind. “What are you thinking right now? What’s going through your mind?” He inquired gently.

After a moment of pondering, you responded. “I just can’t believe I’m half him. I just can’t believe that this is my life and I have to deal with him,” Your voice cracked with emotion.

“You are not him, you are you. And you are 20 times stronger than that shrimp of a man,” His response got the ends of your lips to twitch up in a smile that lasted for a millisecond, but George considered that a win. “Okay? You don’t have to worry about him anymore. I promise,” You nodded. “Maybe make your Instagram private though?”

[changbinsboiledegg]

Hii Can u so idol ENHYPEN reaction to giving there idol s/o a hickey? Love your world btw!!!

Heyoo thank you so much!!! 🥹 And thank you for your request! 🫶🫶

Idol! Reader X Enhypen Hyung line

MDNI!!!!!!!!!

Warnings: SUGGESTIVE, Hickeys, making out, petname usage? Fluff if you squint I think.

Note: Me personally, I’d go on hiatus. No but the way my search history is 'how to hide a hickey' mf, apparently they last 2 days-2 weeks?? Definitely going on hiatus LMAO. Anyways, if no one told you today, ily 🫶

♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎

Heeseung

You were panicking as soon as you saw the fresh hickey— courtesy of Heeseung— on the side of your neck.

“Damnit…” you tried to think if ways to hide it. There was always makeup, but that had the tendency to wash off or smear if you weren’t careful enough.

You called the culprit, demanding he help with what he caused. Heeseung answered your call on the first ring.

“Back for more?” You could hear the smirk in his tired voice.

“No! You left a mark on me!” You looked at the door to the bathroom, hoping no one heard.

“Yeah?” Heeseung yawned. You groaned, “I have to MC today!”

“I’m on my way.” He sounded as if he were in a hurry now and hung up. You ran to your room and looked for something, anything.

You found a choker, thick enough to hide Heeseung’s mark left on you.

Jay

He knew what he was doing when he gave you the hickeys trailing down your chest, some on your stomach and even some on your thighs.

You were too lost in the heat of the moment to care where he left any hickeys, but man, were you grateful when you saw that he left the in places that were easily covered up by your outfits the stylist gave you for your groups comeback.

“I was scared I would have to explain to the stylist that my boyfriend left a bunch of marks on my body.” You murmured against Jay’s lips the moment filming and recording was done.

Jay smirked against yours, “I told you you wouldn’t need to worry.”

“Hm, I don’t remember that.” You kissed him again, melting further into his arms. Jay chuckled, “because you were busy saying my name over and over again.”

Jake

“I don’t think smearing it is going to hide it from the cameras.” You tried your best to stay still as Jake helped you cover the marks he left on your neck and collarbones.

Jake tried to add more concealer to cover the hickeys, but to no avail. He huffed, setting down the bottle on the bathroom counter.

“Do you really need to hide them?” Jake asked, making eye contact with you. You nodded, slowly at first, then quickly.

“Yes! I have a comeback to film for in a few hours.”

Jake took your hands in his and placed kissed on both of your palms, “I don’t know. I kinda like the idea of everyone knowing that you’re mine.”

You felt your cheeks heat up, unable to form a thought for a moment before recollecting yourself, “Not like this.”

Sunghoon

You didn’t realize you have a hickey on your neck, not even paying attention to yourself in the mirror as you were getting ready for the day.

Even as you earned questionable looks, you didn’t see anything wrong. You were used to the way people looked at you, good or bad.

You walked up to Sunghoon, acting as if his lips weren’t attached to your neck the night before.

At first, he gave you a smile before quickly standing up and pulling you somewhere discreet, pretending he needed to ask you something important.

“What’s up—“

“Your neck.” He whispered, taking off his hoodie and pulling it over your head. You felt around your neck before stopping over a particularly sore spot, realizing what it was.

“You did not…”

Sunghoon just raised his eyebrows, adjusting the collar and hood to cover your neck. “Sorry, baby.”

[thelingodingo]

Korean Titles of BTS Songs

Remember when a bunch of fans were asking Jungkook about BTS' song 'Paradise' and he had no idea what they were talking about since the Korean name of the song is different from the English?

Well, that's what I thought I could make a post about since it's very common across multiple of their songs!

A lot of the times in Kpop, the Korean name of a song has a completely different translation than the English name so I wanted to start a series explaining the more intricate details of the translations.

So first up here's a list of explanations of a couple BTS Korean song titles:

Paradise = 낙원 : this is just a regular direct translation

Fire = 불타오르네 : I think this Korean song title is great enough to have a post of its own due to how useful it would be to Korean learners as it requires knowledge of multiple aspects of Korean to truly understand. In English, it could still be translated as "fire" but it definitely holds more meaning in the original Korean. 불 (bul) means fire and the verb 불타오르다 (bul ta o reu da) means "to be burning/aflamed". The 네 (ne) part of the title 불타오르네 (bul ta o reu ne) is a grammar particle that expresses admiration, surprise, etc. So all together the song title is sort of saying something along the lines of "oh look, it's burning up in flames" I guess??? It's hard to try and explain the nuance in English.

Telepathy = 잠시 : this title translates directly to "for a moment"

Boy with Luv = 작은 것들을 위한 시 : beautifully means "a poem for the small things" which I think would've made a great English title too

Go Go = 고민보다 GO : this translates to "rather than worrying about it, go"

Dis-ease = 병 : this literally translates to disease in Korean but apparently some media(?) thought it translated to 'bottle' (like a plastic water bottle) which I guess makes sense since it's the same word in Korean but lmao I thought that was funny.

I do like BTS but I'm not an Army so if any fans happen to know any deeper information that may further elaborate on the reasoning for these title changes in English please feel free to add on!

If you would like a Part 2 or have any specific questions then just ask!

I know I've been away for a very long time to any of my followers that keep up with my posts (thank u btw) and I am trying to get back into posting but it has been an extremely busy year for me :(

[midnight--sadness]

As for that ask you received earlier regarding why Ilnam ensured Inho would win his games, I think we shouldn't ignore the general sexual undertones (or honestly, overtones) of what happens on the VIPs' side of the games (human furniture, lounging around in bathrobes and nothing else, etc.)

I rarely see people considering this aspect, probably because it feels like a taboo with Ilnam's age, but I think it's entirely possible that a big component of why he chose Inho and later Gihun as his favorites was due to sexually nefarious reasons. Do I think it's the entire cause of his favoritism towards both men? No, definitely not. I think he was compelled by Gihun's heart and Inho's cunning ways, and I also believe he saw them both as surrogate sons, since his dialogue during marbles makes it seem like his relationship with his own son was strained. But I think despite seeing them as surrogate sons, he was still a total creep in his motivation for "mentoring" them. And do I think he ever tried to "make a move" on Inho in that way? Also no, but I think he had a desire to "keep him" in the same way that people hang up posters of celebrities they think are attractive. He clearly liked to collect/surround himself with beautiful things! There were plenty of good-looking players, so being beautiful on its own wouldn't be enough to capture his interest, but both Inho and Gihun have other huge traits that made them worthy in Ilnam's eyes. Anyway, this was a disjointed ramble, hopefully it makes sense! Interested to hear your opinion, thank you!

first of all, i apologize for taking so long to answer this and other asks i have in my inbox but i was going through it these past few days lmao 😭

this is referring to this ask!

this is a really interesting point, honestly!! i've made a joke or two abt ilnam deserving a spot in gihun's harem just bc of how much favoritism he displays when it comes to gihun, but i can definitely understand what u mean with this!

we don't know a lot about ilnam and his motivations, especially when it make to inho. this season just left us with more questions when it comes to inho's past, unfortunately.

i do agree with what you said abt ilnam almost "collecting" ppl. he sees those who can further his cause and manipulates them to his side; with inho, i don't think he had to do a lot of work, since i assume inho was already tired of humanity after losing his job, his wife and child, and having to murder a bunch of ppl in the games to win.

the same way that the masked officer helped noeul bc he saw how dangerous she was and knew that he needed her at the games bc of how good she was, i think ilnam had a similar interest in both inho and gihun.

with inho so he'll become front man, and with gihun so he'll become the host.

cause i've been thinking abt this and ilnam's closeness to gihun was actually initiated by gihun himself; he sees an old defenseless man and chooses to protect him. he makes ilnam remember his son (as does inho, exactly like u said, anon) and ilnam definitely grows attached to him.

gihun is charismatic, he makes friends easily, he has a way of making people trust him... what more could ilnam want in a future host? gihun would be kinda perfect for the role, if we literally ignore every other aspect of his personality - and isnt that what ilnam did? he only saw the parts of gihun that he wanted and ignored the rest. (he's a bit like inho in that sense). gihun would never work for the games or entertain the vips, not when he has such a strong sense of morale; he couldn't bear to sit by as ppl are slaughtered and he plays nice with a bunch of rich pricks.

but going back to the sexual aspect u mentioned.... yeah, i can see it. that entire island is full of perverts :/ even if he never acted on it and a part of his saw inho and gihun as his sons, him having some sort of sexual feelings for them isnt too out there, especially considering, like u say, the whole thing with the vips and the sex workers being kept around the island for the games.

gihun and inho are both handsome men that would only make ilnam richer and more powerful if they were on his side, so yeah, i can def see that u mean.

[apollosgiftofprophecy]

Who do you think is Apollo's favourite uncle, and favourite aunt, both in rr!verse and in general?

Ah yes, the long debated question. We know Apollo is everyone’s favorite, but who is his favorite? 👀

Favorite Uncle: Poseidon

I feel like this is true in mythology and the RRverse (unless Eclipse happens. Then it’s Hades. sorry Poseidon lol)

this was especially true during ancient times when the gods were a lot more interactive with each other. Not to mention Apollo and Poseidon had LOTS of myths where they interacted!

we have their time in Troy. Also that one time Poseidon was like “aight I need u to fight me, okay? But u have to start it because I’m supposed to be the responsible one since I’m older”

And Apollo was like “…🤨 no thanks ❤️”

I bet Poseidon chose Apollo because if he has to fight someone, he would like to duke it out with his favorite nephew lmao

And he DID get that fight in the Dionysica. Idk the details of it besides Hermes going “wtf” at Poseidon 😔 but one day I will…I just have a lot of books to get through first lmao

Favorite Aunt: Demeter

“but what about Hestia—”

THAT BE WHERE YOU ARE WRONG! :D

sure, Apollo likes Hestia, but you’re gonna tell me that Apollo, god of light and averted of plague—which includes pests like locusts and mice—wouldn’t adore Demeter, goddess of agriculture???!!!

u are WRONG if u say no ❤️

and like imagine this: baby Apollo arrives on Olympus after his nine-year exile and is OVERWHELMED by it.

are you gonna tell me Demeter didn’t take one look at this wide-eyed lost child and go “I now have joint custody” and proceeded to mother hen him.

this would ALSO open the gateway to Apollo and Persephone becoming friends, because I LOVE to idea of Persephone being the Weird Big Sister :3

There’s Athena, the one who keeps them out of Major trouble. Artemis who provides a feedback loop for Persephone’s more wild side. Persephone who drags them around Greece for something to do. And Apollo, the baby brother who hangs with his sisters and loves them so much 💕💕

and they do each other’s hair because I say so ❤️

Demeter is also there so she also is the aunt who spent to most time with Apollo, further reenforcing the fact she’s the fav aunt :3 she also does their hair and put sunflowers in Apollo’s <3

and I think this ALSO goes for both mythology and RRverse! Seems kinda cool that light’s favorite family members are water and earth, two things combined with light to make…life.

I am so poetic <3

[stellamancer]

niku i don’t thiiiiink we’ve ever talked about this before (<- goldfish brain)……. but . that drabble made me wonder. how would bten!reader react if gojo found out abt their bday and did something sweet for them….? since their relationship with time is all fucked up i’m assuming they maybe wouldn’t remember it themselves 😭 or care? question mark? anyway this is just me begging for more crumbs im sorry …. scurries away . into the night (i love u)

omg ari so i intended to write this a a drabble when I was very sleepy, but as I got into attempting to it got so depressing LMAO.

so I'm going to. not. FORGIVE MEEEEEEE. but uh, I will answer this in reverse order.

first, I'm assuming when you say that they wouldn't remember it in the sense of they wouldn't think about it coming up, which is... pretty accurate. honestly if it weren't for their own phone they would not be able to keep track of like what day it is. I mean, I guess saying it like that it doesn't seem like anything too special but like... the days kind of blur together for them (especially since their sleeping habits are abyssmal). So like, if their birthday is coming up they just know it's 'soon' and not like 'it's in three days.'

As for caring, as I told you LMAO, prior to the events of bten, bten!reader wasn't the type to make a big fuss about their birthday. I think their personal form of celebrating may be like a splurge purchase. However, their besties would DEFINITELY make a big deal of it, and drag them out to celebrate it together (going out to dinner together, going for karaoke, there's one year Mio demands bten!reader takes the day off from work and they go to Tokyo Disney Sea). And while bten!reader would always tell them that they don't have to do anything, they still do and deep down it makes them happy. I think the only reason bten!reader cared about their birthday in the past was because it was a reason for their friends to get together and, since they're adults with jobs and such, they have less opportunities to do so.

So, the first birthday after the events of bten.... Would be hard. Very hard. I think that bten!reader would actually actively try to not even think about it if they can avoid it. But I think Mio still reaches out and they do end up spending bten!reader's birthday together but like... visiting shinn and kei's graves and it's probably pretty depressing LMAO........

as for how they would react if gojo did something sweet for them...

Just inside the barrier leading to Jujutsu High you find none other than Satoru Gojo waiting, leaning casually against the pillar of the torii gate that leads onto the campus grounds. He grins widely when you catch sight of him making it clear that he was waiting for you. The realization makes your stomach twist. What could he possibly want?

"Not like you to go anywhere when you don't have a mission," he remarks. "Where'd you wander off to?"

"...went to visit my friends' graves."

"Pretty morbid way to spend your birthday, if you ask me."

You frown slightly, not even bothering to wonder how he knew. "I didn't ask."

Gojo merely shrugs, annoyingly nonchalant. You stare at him, wondering if he's going to tell you why he's been waiting for you on his own or if he's going to make you ask.

Knowing him, it's the latter.

"...what is it?" you finally ask with a sigh. You feel oddly tired and the sooner you can settle whatever it is Gojo wants, the sooner you can lay down and rest. Though, whether or not you sleep is another matter entirely.

"Nothing much," he answers casually. "Just wanted to give you this."

Out of seemingly nowhere he pulls out a large rectangular package and bops you lightly on the head with it. Slowly, you reach up and take it from him. Upon further inspection, you find it's some item wrapped in decorative paper. You stare at it for a good, long second, then up at Gojo.

He chuckles. "It's a present. You know, a birthday present."

"...you didn't have to," you say almost automatically, hand running over the paper. It's a shimmery sort of light blue that's reminiscent of Gojo's eyes. You're surprised, not only did he take the time to find out your birthday, he got you a present— even had it wrapped

"And?"

"...thank you," you say quietly. "...is it okay to open it?"

"Go ahead."

You carefully pull at the folds in the paper, careful to not rip the paper as you unwrap the present. Beneath the paper is a book of sorts, with a soft leathery cover. You blink. "A journal?"

"Thought it might be useful," he explains. "You're having trouble keeping track of the days, right?"

You are, and you think you remember reading somewhere that keeping something like a daily journal might help but... "Isn't it more common to use a blog or app for this kind of thing."

Gojo shrugs. "Probably, but I thought you might like something more ... tangible."

You're not so sure. The last time you wrote in a notebook was in high school. It's easier to use a phone or a computer, but there's something about the physical journal that's...

"Take a look inside," Gojo urges, barely managing to contain a grin.

Your eyes narrow and you flip the pages of the notebook. Sure enough in the corners and the top parts of a few of the pages you spot little doodles and drawings; all cartoon renditions of the man before you.

"...most people wouldn't appreciate someone defiling their journal like this," you deadpan.

Gojo waves his hand dismissively. "It gives it character! Are you telling me you don't like my drawings?"

"I didn't say that."

"So then you do like them!"

"I didn't say that either."

Gojo pouts, ignoring you. "Well, then, which is it?"

"....they look kind of dumb."

"They do not!" Gojo exclaims, scandalized. "You take that back!"

"No," you respond flatly. The pout returns to his face and you sigh. "But I will admit you are right, that it does give the journal character."

The pout is instantly gone, replaced with the proud puff of his chest. How ridiculous. Sometimes you have a hard time believing this ridiculous man brutally exorcised hundred of curses right before your eyes. "...will you use it?"

"...yes." After all, it's not like you to waste a thoughtful present like this.

"Promise?"

"Yes, Gojo."

"Will you let me read it?"

"...... maybe." If it's just recording your daily life you can't imagine there being any reason to keep the contents a secret. But at the same time...

Gojo grins, and you can tell he's taken your "maybe" as a "yes."

You could correct him, but you decide not to.

[lemedstudent2021]

KINDREEED I'M SCAAARED

I WANT TO DO THIS ART THING WHERE MERCH DESIGN FOR JANANI K. JHA (APHRODITEEEEE) BUUUUT I ALSO HAVE A BIG BIG EXTRACURRICULAR FINAL EXAM IN 9 DAYS

9 DAYS

MY PARENTS WON'T LET ME DO IT IF I FAIL

I'VE FORGOTTEN EVERYTHING I'M GOING TO CRYYYYYY

DO YOU HAVE ANY GOOD STUDYING TECHNIQUES???

I FORGOT EVERYTHING-THE TEACHER DIDN'T EXPLAIN IT ALL VERY WELL-AND MY NOTES HAVE VANISHED

-NYX T-T

WOAH OMG OKAY! IM HOLDING UR HAND LETS DO THIS:

i have no idea what it is ur studying (like if its memorisation heavy or practice heavy, history vs maths for example) but i can advise u as follows:

start with bismillah!! u got this inshallah >:D

aight first were going to get ur calendar and study material out and plan: if i understood right ur test is on day 9 so u have 8 to study? (ill go with that just in case u plan according to what u have):-

in those 8 days how much stuff (topics/ chapters) do u need to cover? some parts may be longer/ harder than others and might need extra time, dont forget to take that into account! take bio example; id study a topic a day (one for mitosis, the next for cellular respiration, etc. but if ur tight on time group similar stuff together) and solve questions to help the ideas stick *and* make sure ive gotten everything down; if i forgor something or found a question particularly hard its an indication to go reread and study further that area specifically.

plan realistically and play to your strengths; start with what will be the easiest for you. for example i loved molecular bio (cell stuff) and left ecology till last, but that might be just me lol. anyway you know best what works for u so go for it!!

if u have school atm take a break after getting home to switch between school and studies, keep taking breaks to stay sane (preferrably after milestones), drink plenty of water and dont lose sleep!! very rich coming from me i know lol but u must sleep. or else ill haunt u :3

breaks btw can be getting up to pray, doing a random chore, eating a snack or having a meal with family, regardless i advise getting up and moving to really freshen ur mind! daydreaming also works lol

assuming u have a book/ reference material; id say look at the objectives before every lesson, usually thats what teachers focus on because thems the objectives lol. its a place to start

next, again this depends on what ur studying, but i cant sing enough praises for mind maps & mnemonics. life savers fr:

the idea is to start with the bigger picture; what is this lesson about? what are we learning here? (more bio: if im studying the humble cell i first need to know the kinds of cells, whats in them, how they do what they do. this is ur first mind map thingy: to arrange ur thoughts) and then continue to work your way with the details, seeing if you can come up with words phrases imagery etc to help remember stuff. (so for example making a lil mind map of each organelle and its functions) plenty of stuff exists online too btw!! look for resources and maybe ask classmates if yall have a group or sum. khan academy has saved me many a time back in the day, so did crash course lol. the internet can be a godsend sometimes

now me, kindred, personally, i memorise via writing. if i want anything to stick i keep writing till it does (even quran!), so as i make notes and summarise the way my brain works is that ill start making connections to help me remember stuff bc my memory isnt the best and brute memorisation is a crime. anywya.

literally from todays test: to help me remember the type of mutation (deletion of 1p & 19q) associated with a type of tumor (oligodendroglioma) i make the connection delete and go from oligo. its simple but thats what sticks when im in the exam lol another one i remember form 2 years ago almost is MACE (yk the medieval weapon) is short for a bunch of antibiotics: macrolides = azithro- clarithro- and erythomycin. i forgor everything else about them lmao but the point is this is how i remember stuff. silly little acronyms and mnemonics go a long long way for me

cant stress this enough; make studying enjoyable for urself (yes im serious) try to have a lil milestone sheet or something in mind for finishing topics or days at a time to keep u going and motivated

my gremlin brain needs this or else nothing will get done lol. i doodle on my lecture notes (as yall are all too familiar with lmao) to help get the wiggles out and stay focused, but when im actually done for the day i allow myself a lil research break, teleport to tumblr, microwave the blorbos for a bit etc.

in this case maybe u can plan out the art u want to make; first break plan the art, next one find references, third break make a first draft etc. u know urself and ur habits better than anyone so work with and not against them!!

tl;dr: make a plan -> stick to the plan -> always deliver.

this was significantly funnier in my head aha.

[celestie0]

hi pookie! unrelated to fanfic but i think you were in a gap year earlier and now ur bio says ur a med student. did u get into med school? if so, congrats!!!

actually i'm also in a gap yr and i was wondering how you made sure to be productive every day? like im literally rotting in bed every day lmao bc my day has no structure. sorry if this is too personal and if it is feel free to ignore!!

hiii my love yes i did!! i graduated last year in june n then started med school a few weeks ago :)

oh that's awesomee first of all congratulations on graduating!! that's a wonderful accomplishment. i'm assuming it's only been a couple months since you've graduated? there's no harm at all in taking a break

but yea i think the straightforward answer haha: probably working a job will give you the most structure. i worked full time at a clinic that was a little further away from my house so it ended up eating up a lot of my weekdays (leave house at 7am come home at 6pm type thing) but it was great for the structure and purpose. if you're not feeling like you can work a full time job, then you can work part time too. i left my full time job and started working at a research lab part time and it was a really nice balance of structure to rest before starting school

i'm not sure what your circumstances are, or if working is in your capacities at the moment, but yea like whether you're currently job hunting (i know how bad the job market can be ahhh) or if you're studying for the mcat or whatever you're doing in your gap year, i think the best way to have structure without work is cultivate a good morning routine and cultivate your hobbies. i found most days i would wake up at 6am i'd have much more productive days than days where i'd sleep in to 9/10am and then i'd just feel awful and rot in bed the rest of the day haha. so if you can just get that first couple of hours of the day right, i think you'll be in a good position. but yea cultivating hobbies is also important bc we all crave/need purpose in life, and i think a hobby is great way to have that if you're not getting it from career sources.

yeah and like idk if this is more random advice but i think my biggest piece of advice i'd give someone in their gap year is to just kinda take the time to get to know yourself? get to know what gives you energy and excitement or what interests you. i think you can find this out by testing hobbies, reading books, going out and experiencing stuffs. as premeds, i think undergrad can really suck the soul out of you and make you lose touch w yourself w all the pressures and time spent working towards your application, so having that time during your gap year to just kinda chill n recenter yourself is super precious n valuable.

don't worry too much if you're having days where you're resting, but i think the important distinction to make is: are you resting because it's a voluntary action that you want to do, or are you resting because you're putting off other things? asking yourself that question really helps put power back into your hands to improve your day to day, especially when you're struggling to find structure or purpose

hope this helps bb :0 much lovee to ya <3

[qoldenskies]

Heyya! First of all, I’m a BIG fan of CC! I’ve been reading each update instantly—it’s got me in a chokehold. I love it so much that I can’t even bring myself to read the last chapter.

Now, into My favoritism rant (long rabt ahead super sorry) :

1. Mikey is Donnie’s favorite, and I will die on this hill.

Proof? THE WHOLE SHOW + MOVIE. HELLO?? No further explanation needed.

2. Leo being Donnie’s favorite was always a given to me.

Seriously, he talks about him the most—even if it's just to joke at his expense. whole episode dedicated to getting apology pizza for him and even defended his honor (lol). Plus, it’s canon that Donnie isn’t Mikey’s or Raph’s favorite, so of course it makes perfect sense that he’s Leo’s.

But Leo being Donnie’s favorite?? No way.

I know Ron tweeted about it, BUT Andy also said Mikey is everyone’s favorite in response. So I’m taking this as half-canon, OKAY? Let a girl dream! (Also, I hope I didn’t hallucinate that tweet/thread lol.)

3. My personal headcanon: their favorites aren’t set in stone.

Like, imagine them changing favorites depending on who does them favors or using it as a threat—"Do this for me, and you’ll be my favorite for the month!" I just can’t see the Sunset Duo (or just Raph) playing favourites especially given how affectionately distant their father was.

4. Would love to hear who's is whos favorite in ur opinion :D , Sunset duo akways get left out on that question

.

Sorry for the rant i needed to yap

Have a nice day XOXO

OKAY OKAY ANON I HEAR U.... UR SPITTIN',,,, i see it the other way around with the twins but i see where youre coming from!! with me seeing leo's favorite as raph i just think its because there's a lot more moments where the depths of leo's affection for him is shown. he looks up to him, he knows him well, he freaks out when they get separated from him, he does openly repeatedly worry about him and take initiative to jump in for the sake of his feelings more than once. with donnie most of the time the way leo acts is either more begrudging or joking, mostly joking. it's a mutual part of their relationship that they act like the other is an easy target for jabbing at bahghshg. meanwhile with donnie idk,,, its mostly a vibe-based thing but donnie does come off like he looks up to leo more than he'd like to admit. i definitely subscribe to the belief that he imitates his behavior teehee

also with raph, he would play favorites but he would REFUSE to admit it out loud. he'd definitely go on about he loves them equally but they would all know he means mikey is his favorite. mikey would know that he's his favorite and he'd use it for evil. this wouldnt be upsetting to anyone it would just be fact LMAO, they'd roll their eyes at his refusal to admit it. feels like the kind of joke that actually would be in the show

and mikey would say "youre my favorite brother now" to whoever does something nice for him in the moment. he probably got the habit from leo though. they'd both do that

although i do definitely agree that the whole "favorite sibling" thing is not something i'd want to keep set in stone because i dont want to box in their relationships in the way the other people do, i think all of them have something special and interesting with each other and annoys the shit out of me when people shine all this light on the disaster twins and act like they only care about each other LOL

[gravehags]

unholy, unholy, unholy - the natalie edit

Pairing: Cardinal Copia x f!OC (Curator!OC)

Rating: EXPLICIT, MDNI

Tags: the ministry being the catholic church's evil twin, manipulation, masturbation, confession, copia lowkey being a desperate little sex freak my beloved

Words: 5,162

Summary: She really walked right into this, Natalie tells herself. She can't even be mad at Copia for suggesting it.

a/n: lmao it took me like an hour to edit this so if you see some grammatical fuck ups no you don't anyway enjoy some horndog behavior

~~~

“Jesus fucking Christ Almighty.”

Natalie slams her office door shut with her hip and Cardinal Copia turns to look at her from his seat.

“Need help?”

With a grunt and a shake of her head she walks past him and sets the bag of food down on her desk, heaving a deep sigh.

“Had to go on a fucking scavenger hunt because the goddamn DoorDash driver left the bag with a maintenance worker, who gave it to one of Terzo’s ghouls, who left it in a stairwell for some reason…don’t ask me how I managed to find it because fuck if I know.”

Dramatically she flops into her desk chair and gives her lunch companion a look as he begins to sort out their meals with a smile.

“You know you eh…take the Lord’s name in vain quite a bit for someone who wasn’t raised in religion.”

When he passes Natalie’s container of Pad see ew to her, she grins.

“Ehhh you know, the perils of being raised in a predominantly Christian society. It’s funny, the first time I said ‘Jesus Christ’ I was maybe…I don’t know nine? Ten? And my mom tersely told me ‘don’t say that’ to which I replied ‘why not?’ I don’t think she knew how to answer that question in a way that would make me care, you know? I had gone all my little life not giving a shit about Jesus, why would I now?”

Copia chuckles and cracks open his own takeaway box.

“Ah Natalia, you continue to stray further and further from God’s light every day. Thank Sathanas for that, hmm?”

With a smile, she clinks her soda can against his and digs into her meal.

“You ever think about how fascinating your religion is, Copia?”

Natalie props her feet up on her desk as Copia delicately picks noodles out of his box with chopsticks. 

“Eh, how do you mean?”

“Like…you’re a Satanic cardinal. You’ve sworn your life to uphold the tenets of Satanism. You…we live at a massive complex dedicated to Satan. One of many complexes throughout the world, apparently. And yet, barely anyone knows of the Ministry’s existence. It’s wild, really.”

He makes a thoughtful noise as he chews on a particularly crunchy piece of bok choy.

“Ah, well,” he begins, setting his chopsticks down and reaching for the soda resting on the desk, “We’re trying to change that. In…subtle ways.”

“Mmm, the Ghost project.”

“Sì, the idea is we use Papa to spread our message through music - something that is accessible to many people.”

“With the hopes that you and your evil brethren can dominate the globe?” she says, scrunching her nose playfully and giving him a big wink.

“Something like that,” he smiles wryly.

“Well I’ve listened to some of the project’s music and I gotta say…big fan. I think your sinister subliminal messaging is working on me.”

“Oh?” he asks, setting down his food in order to cross his legs and give her a curious stare. “Tell me more, cara. Do I have a future sister of sin on my hands?”

Natalie closes her eyes and laughs, missing the hungry way the Cardinal watches the line of her pale throat as her head tilts back.

“Maybe…let’s just say I’m intrigued. How could I not be when I’m surrounded by it all the time?”

He nods, resting a gloved hand on his knee and straightening his cassock.

“Perhaps…”

She fixes him with a look she knows will make him lose his train of thought for a moment. Positively wicked.

“Perhaps…?”

“Perhaps,” he clears his throat, eyes darting away from hers, “You would like to attend one of our services?”

Natalie nods gamely. 

“Is a super cool and hip youth pastor going to tell me about the ways the Devil cares about me unconditionally?”

He rolls his eyes and fixes her with an unamused stare.

“Very funny, dolcezza. Would you prefer that I have you sit with Papa Nihil while he explains the history of the Emeritus bloodline?”

Natalie balks. The wizened Papa had a distinct dislike of her for some odd reason. She often wonders how he manages to give her such dirty looks through his cloudy eyes. She didn’t particularly care, however, as she saw the way he constantly brushed off and mistreated Copia during staff meetings. Nihil irked her to no end, no matter how much Sister Imperator liked him.

“Alright, fine, sorry. I only jest to get a rise out of you, I know how important your religion is to you. And hey, anything that has the drama and aesthetics of the Catholic Church without all the guilt and trauma has my full attention. Please don’t be mad.”

He grunts but she sees the way his mustache twitches as he fights back a smile. Natalie flutters her eyelashes a little and in a moment of boldness, takes her lower lip between her teeth. The way his mismatched eyes dart to her mouth and his jaw hangs open makes her giddy.

“I’m–,” his voice comes out as a hoarse rasp, “I forgive you, Natalia.”

“Thank you for absolving me of my sins, Your Eminence.”

He has to know she’s doing this on purpose at this point. Natalie’s not sure what has gotten into her today but something about the way he stares at her now makes her want to grab him by his pellegrina and haul him over her desk for a sloppy kiss. There’s a heavy tension between the two of them, not for the first time, as if all one of them needs to do is take a step forward and all hell would break loose.

“So, you want me to go to a service? What, like black mass? Unholy baptism? Virgin sacrifice?”

The spell is broken and briefly Natalie’s swagger flickers, wondering if she’s crossed a line.

“Eh, maybe someday but your statement about sin made me think…perhaps confession would be more suited to you?”

Now her jaw falls open and she can feel her cheeks light up as he watches her with a smirk toying at the corners of his mouth. The tables have turned and now she’s the one left speechless.

“O-oh?” she asks, voice a little higher than normal, “So if Catholic confession is about getting your sins forgiven, then Satanic confession is…having your sins…celebrated?”

“Corretto,” he says with a generous nod, “We’ll go through each one in ah…intimate detail.”

“We?” she squeaks out, stomach dropping severely, “I hadn’t realized that you would be presiding.”

“Oh sì,” he says, the smirk on his face positively devilish, “Although if you’d prefer someone else…”

“No,” she says just a little too quickly, her heart pounding, “I…I don’t know how much sinning I really get up to. I’ll probably bore you to tears.”

“You might be surprised, dolcezza,” Christ the nickname sounds devious on his lips right now, “What is it they say? ‘Still waters run deep’?”

Natalie’s laugh comes out just a little too loud and unnatural and she kicks herself.

“Ha…right. We…we should probably get back to this cataloging or Sister Imperator is going to publicly execute me.”

The rest of the afternoon proceeds normally, with the two of them diligently organizing the abbey’s collection of illuminated manuscripts. When they finally part, he gives her the date, time, and directions to the chapel where the confession booth is located.

“Natalia,” he murmurs as she begins to walk away, “you don’t have to do this.”

She gives him a half-smile and shakes her head.

“I think it will be good for me,” she says, hands behind her back as she rocks onto her heels, “And besides, how could I say no to spending an evening with you?”

Natalie makes sure not to turn away until she sees the full breadth of his dazed expression and by the time her back is to him and she’s walking away, there’s a loopy grin on her face. It’s not til she turns the corner and reaches the staircase to her quarters the full realization of what she’s agreed to dawns upon her. 

Oh fuck.

—

Natalie doesn’t see Copia the next two days between his duties and her own and for that she’s extremely thankful. The date of her confession has arrived and she’s equal parts nauseated and exhilarated. Having never gone to confession of any sort before, she’s not entirely sure what to expect. She’s not ignorant - she’s seen confession scenes in the media and have heard from friends raised in Catholicism - but what little she does know doesn’t assuage her anxiety. This is Satanic confession. A whole different beast. Her mind conjures images of blood rituals and sacrifices and being on her knees before Copia…his gloved hand tilting her chin upwards to look at him…

Christ Almighty, get your shit together.

She desperately tries to, as she sternly told herself, get her shit together but her mind is clouded the rest of her workday with positively sinful scenes of the two of them. Natalie’s particularly fond of the one where he’s got her in his office, her skirt hiked up over her hips as she bends over his desk and he pushes himself inside her from behind. The thought of his voice in her head, calling her his sweet little nicknames as he fucks into her, makes her practically drip. The final two hours in her office are torture before she’s able to skitter back to her rooms. She’s not meeting with Copia for another few hours and she needs to do something about the ache between her thighs. Impatiently, she fumbles for the buttons on her blouse with one hand while pushing her skirt off with another. She must look a sight, ripping her bra off and flinging it somewhere on the floor, but all she can think about now is getting to her bed. She almost trips twice in the journey to her room, blindly stumbling over and flinging herself on the mattress. What has gotten into her? She’s been horny before, about Copia sure, but this? The way she’s practically whining when her hands meet her bare breasts? She feels positively feral. 

“Copia,” Natalie breathes, fingers pinching at her nipples. She imagines his hands on her, the way the leather would warm as he strokes her soft skin.

Dolcezza. 

Fuck, she can hear it perfectly and it makes her sigh, one of her hands slowly sliding down her body to cup the heat of her. She’s sopping and time feels like it slows as she spreads herself open and slides two fingers against her engorged clit. All of her frantic rushing from earlier ceases as she twitches under her own touch, his name on her lips. She’s so sensitive right now it barely takes anything to bring her over the edge, but, she thinks as her orgasm wanes, it’s not quite enough. Taking a slow inhale she slips her fingers lower and teases at her entrance. The digits glide in easily enough with the abundance of slick coming from her and languorously she begins to pump them in and out. Her eyes slide shut and she imagines it’s his dexterous fingers instead, curling inside her so she can feel every stitch and groove of his glove. 

Cara mia, he’d murmur into her ear, so wet for me. So sweet for your Cardinal, eh? You honor me.

The whimpers crawling out of Natalie’s mouth are getting more frequent and higher in pitch - she knows she’s close. She brings her palm flat against herself to push on her clit as her hips continue to make little circles, driving her fingers deeper in. Her hand is aching but it doesn’t stop her from pulling another orgasm out of herself, chanting his name. Tears pool in her eyes and slide down her temples as she sobs aloud and all of a sudden it’s too much. Her body spasms on the duvet, breath coming in harsh pants as she attempts to slow the thundering of her heart. It’s not the first time she’s touched herself to the thought of him, by any means, but something feels…different. More charged. She’s exhausted, bone tired as she tries to organize her feelings. Reaching a hand up to rub her face she turns over and looks at the clock. 

5:32 PM

Her eyelids are heavy but she manages to lean over the side of her bed and locate her phone to set an alarm. Some sleep would do her good. Clear her head.

She doesn’t dream.

—------

Cazzo, cazzo, cazzo.

Copia paces back and forth in the small, dimly lit (romantically lit, some would say) chapel. The last sibling of the evening just left and now all that remains is…her. He barely heard what the siblings were telling him this evening, so anxious was he and caught up in the thought of Natalia soon being in their position. More than once his vision went blurry as he imagined her a breath away, separated only by the decorative wooden screen.

He was so eager for her to walk through that door, now he’s not sure. With a heavy sigh through his nose he looks down at his watch.

6:58 PM

She’s always punctual and he counts on tonight being no different. Resigned to his fate, he shuffles over to the confession booth and opens the door, slotting himself inside. Shit, his ass hurts from the hard bench, why in fuck’s name had they not added a cushion to this side like there was on the other? He’s grumbling to himself in Italian when he hears the chapel door squeak open and firmly shut. Natalie’s soft footsteps approach - she must be wearing her sneakers and not her boots for the distinct clacking sound he usually hears from her has vanished. He sucks in a breath when he hears her open her side of the booth and quietly shut it. There’s a silence between the two of them so profound that when Natalie finally speaks he jumps.

“Hey. You’re in there right?”

He makes a loud, vague noise and sees her shoulders drop through the screen. He can’t get a read on her expression but the anxiety in the air has softened with her posture. 

“Good evening,” he begins, a little stiffly. “Eh, welcome.”

She breathes out heavy through her nose.

“Copia, is this a good idea?”

He pauses and looks down to pull at a loose thread on his cuff.

“Are…are you nervous, Natalia?”

She lets out a soft, self-deprecating laugh.

“Yeah, I’m fucking nervous! I’ve never even been to a regular confession let alone…this.”

“Well, we begin with the ceremonial bloodletting and–”

“Oh fuck off,” she grouses, flicking the screen that separates them. She falls silent after a moment.

“Cara, are you truly that anxious? Because we don’t have to do any–”

“I’m fine, Copia. Really. I don’t know why I'm so worked up. Fear of the unknown, I suppose,” she clears her throat and he hears her crack her neck.

“Bene. Shall I go over the process with you? And remember this is a celebration. No shaming. No guilt. No wrong answers.”

She takes a deep breath in and he sees her nod.

“I will start with the blessing and then we will go through the seven cardinal sins one by one. You may describe yours as briefly or lengthy as you like and we will venerate them. Once we have finished, I will close with a blessing. Then we will part. Nothing to be nervous about, eh? Are you ready?”

“Yes, please.”

“Very good,” he clears his throat and straightens his shoulders. “In nomine Padre, et Filio, et lo Spiritus Malum…we welcome this most sacred sinner into your embrace that she may revel in her transgressions against God.”

When he addresses her by name, he sees her jump.

“Let us begin with the Original Sin - pride.”

“Okay. Yeah. Pride.” There’s a few seconds of silence before he hears her softly curse. “Sorry, I should have made a list or something.”

“Take your time,” he says with a smile, simply content to be in her presence, “I have nowhere to be, Natalia. I am right here, ready when you are.”

He can see her eyelashes flutter as she looks down and her cheeks bunch in a soft smile. Although mostly obscured, the sight still makes his heart soar. After a minute or so of silence she speaks.

“Oh! Okay, uh pride. Well I was going to tell you about this anyway but…you know that little write-up I did of Satanic art in the time of the Counter-Reformation?”

“Naturalmente, it was superb.”

“Thank you. Well I thought it was too so I submitted it to a journal for publishing…and they accepted it.”

He can practically hear her grin and it makes him beam in return.

“Cara mia! Congratulazioni! You deserve nothing less! Although I hope you do not consider it a sin to rightfully celebrate an occasion such as this?”

Natalie sighs.

“Ah, I don’t know. I may have bragged a bit too much to other people in the field. Felt a little too self-satisfied about it. So I think that would count, right?”

He scoffs.

“To Papa Frankie, maybe. To us it is a well-deserved acknowledgement of your hard work and something you have every right to be proud of. Dolcezza, even if you hesitate to celebrate yourself, know that I always will do so for you. Published in a journal, well done Natalia.”

He may not be able to see it in the low light of the confessional but he can picture her flushed cheeks perfectly in his mind.

“Anything else you would like to say on the matter?”

“No, that’s it.”

“Are you ready for the next?”

“Yes,” she says, with greater confidence, “Let’s continue.”

“Onto the next. Envy.”

“Ah,” Natalie seems to deflate a little and his brows knit together, “Well about that. This…wow this is embarrassing.”

“No such thing as embarrassing at this moment. It’s a safe space, remember?”

“Right,” she huffs, “Okay well here it goes then. I see the sisters of sin every day walking around the corridors, working in the library, in the dining hall and…I envy them. I envy their bold confidence in their appearance and their sexuality.”

He’s silent for a moment, weighing whether or not he should say what he’s thinking. But she deserves to hear this.

“Confidence is not only represented by eh, wearing short skirts and high heels. I see you exude it every day when you’re bossing me around, no?”

Natalie barks out a laugh and it lightens his heart.

“Truth be told,” he sighs, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose, “I’m not the best person to be taking advice on confidence from. But I know how to recognize it and I see it in you.”

“Thank you,” she murmurs so softly he thinks he might have made it up, “Can we move on?”

“Si,” he says before clearing his throat, “Next one is wrath.”

He hears her suck in a breath through her teeth.

“Oh, I’ve got a good one for this. Well…not good. It wasn’t my best moment. But it definitely fits the bill.”

He makes a noise prompting her to continue.

“You know that new painting that Sister Imperator got at auction? The one of Lilith and Faust? It arrived last week and she asked me to oversee its unboxing. I told all the siblings working with me that once the box was open the painting was to be handled with archival gloves. I had to step out of the room for a second to talk to the head librarian and when I came back…not a glove to be found and the painting was halfway out of its crate. Copia I…I lost my shit. You know me I-I don’t get mad. But the fact that they had disregarded my instruction and got their bare fingers on that canvas, then acted ignorant about the whole thing…Christ, Copia I saw red. I don’t even remember half of what I yelled at them. I had to walk out before I did something I would regret. God, I already regretted raising my voice. I didn’t report them to Sister Imperator but she found out somehow…maybe the librarian? I don’t know what their punishment was but I haven’t seen them since. Copia, it was awful. I was awful.”

“With good reason,” he replies promptly, “They should have respected your authority as a professional in the field and by not doing so not only did they potentially damage Ministry property, but they also embarrassed themselves. Idioti. Though I would have liked to have seen you all riled up.” A confession of his own - Sathanas, would he have loved to see her flying at them like a demon, her claws sharp and her words sharper. The thought sends a shiver of arousal down his spine and he takes a moment to gather himself before speaking again.

“Is that all you wish to say?”

“Yes. Can we please move on?”

“Very well. Next is sloth.”

Natalie’s silent for a moment and his heart sinks, hoping she’s not dwelling too much on her last confession. He opens his mouth to speak but she beats him to it.

“Sloth, yeah. I, uh,” she lets out a giggle and he’s relieved to hear it, “None of these can get me in trouble with Sister Imperator, right?”

“No,” he says slowly, a grin curling his lips, “This is just between us.”

“Okay good. Do you remember a couple weeks back when I texted you that I wasn’t coming in because I was having a migraine?”

“Sì…”

“I was lying,” the words blurt out of her in a rush but she sounds almost gleeful about it, “I was so fucking tired and so cozy in bed and it was raining outside…I just couldn’t do it. Stayed under the covers all day watching Ghost Adventures.”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk,” he playfully chides, and he can see Natalie’s shoulders shake with laughter, “Signorina Sinclair, I am stunned. Horrified, even–”

“Oh it’s not that bad.”

“Horrified…that you didn’t tell me so I could join you. I love those ghost hunting shows.”

Her laugh makes him smile in return, “Next time we’ll play hooky together, I promise.”

He sighs deeply. “Please. I could use it.”

“I know,” she murmurs, “No one in this abbey works as hard as you do.”

“Grazie, tesoro. I appreciate your kindness.”

Natalie makes a warm noise of affirmation before speaking, “What’s next?”

“Gluttony.”

“Oh Christ,” she cringes, head falling forward, “Maybe…about a month ago? Primo came by my rooms and handed me a Tupperware container of brownies. Told me to eat one per sitting with a sweet old man smile on his face. I’m not an idiot, I heard what he grows in the abbey gardens but my God the stink that came off of these things. I knew I was about to get my shit rocked. So I ate my designated brownie and just puttered around, cleaning up the kitchen. All of a sudden, I’m flat on the floor in front of my fan having an out of body experience. I don’t know how long I was lying there for but by the time I hauled myself up I was so hungry I thought I was losing it. Went through a box of cereal, a sleeve of Ritz crackers, and the next thing I knew I was in the papas’ kitchen making a bag of popcorn. Don’t remember getting there and don’t remember coming back up to my rooms but the next morning I was tucked in bed. So weird.”

He chuckles nervously as if he wasn’t the one to find her wandering the kitchens stoned out of her gourd and put her there.

“Ha yes…weird. That’s…that’s all you remember?”

“Mmhmm. Talk about the devil’s lettuce. Was pissed I didn’t have any cereal the next morning, though.”

“Let’s move onto the next, hmm?” He’s a little louder than necessary but she doesn’t question his suspicious behavior.

“Yeah sure. Hit me.”

“Eh, greed.”

“Hmm,” she ponders and he hears the back of her head thunk against the wood of the booth. “Damn, this is a hard one.”

“It usually is, funnily enough. You can always skip it, if you like.”

“No, no, no,” she says, leaning forward, “I’m trying to get the full set, let me cook.”

That actually makes him laugh out loud. How he adores her so.

“Greed, greed, greed,” she mutters to herself, “Ah…greed would include covetousness, yeah?”

“Mmm, is there something or perhaps…someone you have been coveting?”

It’s a leading question and he knows this as he hears her breath quicken. It’s at this point in his fantasies where Natalie confesses her adoration for him, where he flees the confines of his side of the booth to fall to his knees before her and worship her as Sathanas intended. His tongue darts out to wet his lips and he tastes the bitter tang of his paints which distracts him for a moment when he hears her say–

“Yes. There is someone.”

The silence is deafening between the two of them and his heart thuds against his ribcage, desperate for her to reach over and tear it from his chest. He flexes his hands, the leather squeaking as the both of them sit with the words.

“O-oh?” he finally manages to stutter. He can see her lovely pale green eyes are shut and hears her loudly swallow.

“I, um,” she begins, “Yeah. There is someone I’ve wanted for…a long time. I…I think he–I mean they–might reciprocate but…”

Tell her, you fool.

“Can we do the next one, actually?” Natalie’s voice is so painfully soft and his stomach drops. She is doing you a kindness, his brain cruelly provides, by not telling you of who she truly wants. A sibling, perhaps. Or perhaps…one of your fratelli. The thought pains him so he nearly doubles over on himself as if being punched in the gut. Pride, envy, wrath, sloth, gluttony, greed.

Lust.

He’s startled by the sound of his own voice and she is too, judging from the way she twitches. From his obscured view she looks positively horrified, as if she had forgotten about this one.

“I haven’t been with anyone,” Natalie blurts out, sounding both panicked and deeply embarrassed. He hardly recognizes his own voice as he responds with uncharacteristic calmness.

“Lustful acts…do not always have to involve another person.”

Now why the fuck would he say that? He can see her eyes widen and even in the dim light of the confessional he registers the violent blush on her cheeks.

“Oh I…oh.”

She raises a hand up to rub aggressively at her face, breathing deep.

“In that case, yes,” she finally says and his gut clenches, “I have indulged in the sin of lust.”

“A-about the person you covet?” He’s pushing it but he can’t help himself, can’t help the hope that simmers in his belly and makes his pants tighten.

“Mmm…mhmm,” Natalie responds and she opens her mouth to speak but hesitates. When she finally does, there’s a new tone to her voice - something low. Sensual.

“It’s…good. Fuck it’s good. When I think about them I-I go a little insane. I want them so fucking badly and it’s so easy to think about them and what they could do to me. What I would let them do to me.”

His fist flies to his mouth to stifle the whine that threatens to escape from him and his cock throbs underneath his cassock. He can feel Natalie’s eyes on him, see her full lips parted and it makes him lightheaded. Focus. Focus. Go over there and fuck her against this goddamned confessional. Focus.

“Sathanas bless you, Natalia,” he finally ekes out, his voice hoarse, “I-In celebrating your body a-and your desire you have made Him proud. Well done.”

A beat passes until she clears her throat. He thinks if he doesn’t tend to his dick soon he’s going to pass out.

“That’s all of them then, right? Got the full set?”

“Mmhmm. You can go if you like.”

“Didn’t you say there’s another blessing at the end?”

Satan damn her ability to vex him when he needs relief…and her…the most.

“Eh, yes. In nomine Padre, et Filio, e-et lo Spiritus Malum,” Cazzo what was the rest of it? “Ah…Sathanas bless this most sacred sinner for reveling in her transgressions against God. Nema.”

“Cool, well uh. Goodnight Copia. This has been…enlightening.”

“It certainly has,” he mutters under his breath, fingers itching to adjust his bulge. He’s not sure if Natalie heard him or not because in an instant she’s opened the booth and skittered down the nave to the door. He doesn’t breathe again until he hears her firmly shut it behind her and within seconds he’s fumbling for the hem of his cassock. He knows the likelihood that she was talking about him is slim but simply entertaining the thought that it could be has him unzipping his pants with vicious determination. When his cock finally, blessedly meets leather he could cry with relief. He knows he’s dribbling pre on himself but he doesn’t care - all that matters is the way she sounded confessing her lustful actions to him and how it drives his fist back and forth. Oh, how sweet she was. Tempting even when she isn’t trying to be. How he would revel in ruining her. The thought makes him double over, his unoccupied hand pressed against the wall of the booth in an attempt to stabilize himself. When he thinks of her eagerly spreading herself open for him a broken moan escapes his lips, hips rutting upwards into his grip. What sweet little noises she would make, his Natalia - right there, Copia, please, that’s it - her body eager to yield to his touch. 

“Dolcezza,” he grits out, “ragazza perfetta mia. S-so good–ah–for y-your Cardinal.”

His hand is a blur as it rockets along his shaft and he grunts into the silent chapel. He thinks of Natalie looking up at him with that heart-shatteringly kind look on her face, her lips in a soft smile and he cries out, his seed painting his grucifix in desperate spurts. His mind is fuzzy but his hand doesn’t slow, determined to wrench every last drop out of himself until his head falls back and hits the wood of the booth. Groggily, he puts himself away and lowers his cassock before stumbling out of the confessional. His spend drips onto the stone floor but it matters little - surely it’s not the first that floor has seen. All of a sudden he’s exhausted - feeling every second of his five decades - as he blows out candle after candle. When his task is complete he trudges to the door and rests his forehead on the wood for a moment. 

He thinks of Natalie’s smile once more.