#so if this wasn’t him or maybe even someone actually associated? wouldn’t they say some shit lol

[dogwittaablog]

he did block an acc that @ed his old burner and based on the followers i would say it’s prob him.. but i also think that’s bc i can’t rly imagine someone taking the time out of their day to impersonate him like this 😭

So for a background info if you're not up to date or need a refresher: the user in the first account saying they got blocked by @ gollpatt after tagging the account in a tik tok talking about pro athletes seeing things posted about them. That account also follows/interacts with the same mutual burner accounts on NP's potential one too. (I didn’t know how I missed seeing this when I first peeped the account lmao).

Now we have the deleted tweets, which each tweet that has @‘d him he removed it, but didn’t block the account doing so and allowed them to follow and hasn’t deleted anything else. (I posted 1/2 of these screenshots previously).

[ilguna]

hii could you please write a young coriolanus x reader arranged marriage trope thank you

☼ plinth legacy (Coriolanus Snow) ☼

warnings; swearing, death mention, blood mention, some grief.

wc; 7.7k

notes; made the reader sejanus's sister for angst reasons :)

--

Coriolanus Snow.

A name, much less a person, you had never thought would constantly be on your mind. He wasn’t before. In fact, most days you wouldn’t glance his way twice, unless you had to. He was just another face at the Academy, a friend of your brother, Sejanus. Which, by association, made him a friend of yours. Or, at the very least, acquaintances.

It wasn’t that you didn’t like him, or that he was unbearable to have a conversation with. Actually, his presence was nice, on the occasions that you were around him for longer than a few minutes at a time. He was polite, and always seemed genuinely interested in what you had to say, even if he’d heard it all before from Sejanus.

You started to see more of Coriolanus when they became mentors for the tributes in the districts. You weren’t eligible to participate, and it wasn’t due to grades, but because you’re a year younger than your brother. This didn’t stop him from pulling you to see the tributes in the zoo when the opportunity first struck.

Ma had warned you two to be careful, after what she had seen happen with Coriolanus getting stuck inside. Still, she happily made the sandwiches when Sejanus requested it, and even made extra after he told her what his plan was. He wanted to give them to the tributes inside of the cage, he had a feeling they were hungry, and he was right.

Sejanus couldn’t get them to approach the bars, no matter what he said, or how hard he tried. A few times, you’d tried yourself, attention focused on one person in particular, who was on the far side of the cage, refusing to look your guys’ way. 

Your fingers curled around the cold steel, leaning into it. “Marcus.” You breathed, a smile on your face. “Please, we want to help.” His eyes found you, standing above where Sejanus was crouched. “It’s just a sandwich.”

He didn’t budge, of course. Sejanus took a glance behind the two of you, getting to his feet. The sandwich lowering in one hand, as he waved someone over with the other. When you looked, you found Coriolanus coming through the crowd, blonde curls bouncing with each step. 

When he caught your eye, he gave you a smile. “Trouble?”

“None of them trust us. And why should they?” Sejanus asked.

“Us?” Coriolanus echoed.

“I’ve been trying, too. But not as broadly.” You shook your head.

A girl had marched up next to the three of you to point to a sign on a pillar next to the enclosure. “It says, ‘Please don’t feed the animals.’” 

“They’re not animals, though,” Sejanus told her. “They’re kids, like you and me.”

“They’re not like me! They’re district. That’s why they belong in a cage!” She shouted.

Sejanus sighed. “Once again, like me.” He then looked at Coriolanus. “Coriolanus, do you think you could get your tribute to come over? If she does, the others might. They have to be starving.”

He hesitated, looking through the bars to find his tribute. He took a moment to think, debate whether or not he should. All he needed was a little push to convince him, so you leaned forward, over Sejanus, to place a hand on his arm.

“Please?” The word was sweet, more than you had intended it to be. His eyes moved to you, instead. “Do you have any ideas?”

He took in a breath, “I can’t just treat her like it’s feeding time at the zoo,” He was shaking his head. “Not mine. But I could offer her dinner. Maybe they’ll join after that.”

Sejanus nodded, you removed your hand, giving him a smile. Your brother opened up the backpack for Coriolanus to see the amount of sandwiches and fresh plums that were inside, waiting. “Take whatever. Ma made extra. Please.”

Coriolanus took two sandwiches and two plums, and then moved away to a more private spot, where he sat down on a flat rock. His tribute went up to him to join, and they spoke briefly. She took a bite out of one of the sandwiches, a smile appearing on her face. 

The other tributes had moved forward, seemingly gauging her reaction to make sure that it was good. When she swallowed her bite, she turned her head to them. “You all should get one. They’re real good!” She waved her district friend forward. “Go on, Jessup!”

Jessup took his time approaching the fence, black hair sticking to his forehead from the heat. Sejanus wordlessly handed him a sandwich, and a healthy plum. As soon as Jessup had returned to where he’d been before, the other tributes rushed forward.

You stole a sandwich and a plum, holding them to your chest, eyes on Marcus, as he refused to come forward. A dozen hands stuck themselves through the bars, and your brother struggled to fill them quickly. Within the minute, the food was gone, everyone had gotten one. 

Except for Marcus. 

He had his arms crossed over his chest, face hard. Sejanus pulled a sandwich out of the very bottom of the bag, unaware that the food you were holding was for Marcus, and not for yourself.

“Marcus, this is for you. Take it. Please.” Sejanus said, leaning out as far as he could. “Please, Marcus.” He pleaded. “You must be starving.”

You watched with a sinking heart as Marcus looked Sejanus up and down, and then turned his back to the both of you. One of the other, smaller, boy tributes took the opportunity and ran forward to claim the sandwich, snatching it from Sejanus’s hand. 

The news crew showed up after that, pushing a camera into his face. Your brother wasn’t having it, slinging the empty backpack over his shoulder. He held his elbow out for you, so he could escort you through the crowd better.

“I’m going to talk to Marcus.” You told him. “I don’t want him to go hungry.”

“Ma will be upset that I left you here.” Sejanus said, “She told me to watch you.”

“You wouldn’t be leaving me. I have Coryo.” You motioned to Coriolanus, who was in his own world with his tribute. You cleared your throat, getting his attention. “Sejanus is going to leave, you wouldn’t mind keeping an eye on me, would you?”

Coriolanus nodded, smiling, “Of course not, why’d you even ask?”

Sejanus was satisfied, lowering his elbow. “I’ll see you at home.”

“Tell Ma I won’t be too late.” You said, watching him weave through the crowd to leave.

And then you turned back to the cage, eyes on Marcus in the corner. He was stiff, unmoving in the corner for another few long minutes. Which was probably done to ensure that you two had left. 

When he decided that enough time had passed, he took his time turning around. The first place he looked was in your direction to confirm the coast was clear.

You were certain he was going to shut you out at the sight of you, but he didn’t. He stayed where he was, and so did you. You waited for him to relax, even if it was a little bit, before you bothered to hold up the sandwich and the plum you’d been holding to your chest. The food that you’d been protecting for him.

His face twisted, you stared, drawing in a breath. “Ma made it. I don’t want you to go hungry, Marcus.”

Marcus deliberated, eyes wandering from yours, and then he’d pushed himself off of the wall. You crouched, so that he wouldn’t have to come up the dry moat if he didn’t want to. He took his time, drawing attention to himself. 

If he had any respect from the other tributes for abstaining, it had crumbled like his resolve. 

Marcus stopped at the bottom of the moat, you held out the sandwich and the plum for him. “We’re so sorry you’re here, Marcus. We never could’ve imagined it’d come to this.” He didn’t move, watching you. 

And then all of a sudden he did.

His hands closed around your wrists, yanking you forward. You barely turned your head in time to keep your nose from slamming into the bars, eyes wide, trying to pull back. He had a tight grip on you, squeezing hard enough for you to feel the blood beginning to build in your fingers.

“You aren’t.” He said, voice hard.

“Marcus…” You wiggled, “Marcus, you’re hurting me.”

He tried to pull you in closer, forcing you to press into the bars of the enclosure. “This is what you get, (Y/n). This is what happens when you treat people like animals.”

“But this isn’t my fault!” You shouted, panic settling in. “Let go of me!”

“You’re the one that moved to the Capitol. You didn’t stay in District Two. You’re just as bad as they are.”

“Let go!” You cried, tears in your eyes.

“Get off of her.” A hard voice demanded, a hand shot in front of you to make a grab at Marcus.

Coriolanus was angry, an emotion that you hadn’t seen him wear before. He was always so cool and collected, there wasn’t a lot that could get him riled up. If it did, he would excuse himself, to keep from tarnishing his perfect reputation.

A stern crease was between his eyebrows as he got his hand around one of Marcus’s forearms, bringing him forward with one solid pull. 

“I said, get off of her.” His voice was low.

“Or what?” Marcus asked.

“Or I’ll make you wish you never met her.” 

Marcus listened, never taking his eyes off of Coriolanus, as if he could jump through the narrow bars to strangle him. His hands released, and you let go of the sandwich and the plum in the process. You caught yourself on the bars before you could fall completely, standing up swiftly, brushing dust off your skirt.

Coriolanus reached for you, and you held onto the red sleeve of his Academy uniform, breathing heavily. You shook your head at Marcus, heart beating in your chest. “Just because we’re here now, doesn’t mean we’ve changed, unlike you.”

The evening was ruined, but the zoo was closing anyway. Coriolanus let you hang onto his elbow, as he began to lead you out while blocking the cameras from bombarding you. You didn’t make it very far before you saw Sejanus, sitting behind a boulder. And even though you could’ve let go of Coriolanus, you didn’t.

You were upset, for multiple reasons. Your intentions were completely different from what Marcus assumed. You weren’t there to save face with District Two, you were there to help him. And even worse, you were mad at Sejanus for dragging you along in the first place.

It was the last time you went to see Marcus with Sejanus, but it was the first time Coriolanus kept you up at night. It was the way he had stepped in, how he reached for you first, instead of waiting to see if you wanted his comfort. It stuck out in your mind, and then it didn’t.

When your mom saw the bruises on your wrists the following day, she told you that you were done. Sejanus would have to do the mentoring on his own. This doesn’t mean that you heard about it any less. You probably heard about it more, getting every detail without ever having to ask, because Sejanus offered it up.

You didn’t see Coriolanus for a few days after that, despite the fact that you wanted to thank him. You were too invested in schoolwork, while also trying to come up with ideas for Sejanus to use with Marcus, because he wanted to make things right between them.

When you did see him next, it was the day of Arachne Crane’s funeral. The whole school had gathered on the front steps of the Academy. The groups were divided neatly and alphabetically by class, but Coriolanus wasn’t. He was in the front row, sitting alongside important individuals, namely President Ravenstill.

You had no idea why, until the Academy clock struck nine, and the entire crowd fell silent. That’s when he rose from his seat and walked to the podium, where he sang the anthem. The president then gave a speech about Arachne, how her life didn’t deserve to be taken when all the Capitol is doing is striving for peace.

You bit your tongue, hard. If they wanted peace, they should treat those in the districts together. You’d heard about what happened to Arachne, what she did to her tribute. She was teasing a starving girl, and while you don’t agree that taking a life is the right form of payback, you can’t blame the tribute.

The funeral procession came around the corner, following the drumming. At first, it was all peacekeepers from the honor guard. The crane was next, attached to a flatbed. And dangling from the hook, with bullets in her dead body, was the district girl. Below, shackled to the truck bed, were the twenty-three other tributes, filthy with their heads down.

You were sick, struggling to breathe, as you imagined the amount of pain they had to be in. As you pictured yourself hanging from that hook, or chained to a truck that you couldn’t even stand on. The rest of the funeral was a blur, as the truck disappeared.

Still, you went to find Coriolanus, ignoring your own brother to do so. He was standing near the podium, talking to Dean Highbottom, but as soon as he left, you slid in.

“You sounded amazing.” You said, Coriolanus turned to you with raised eyebrows. When he saw your face, he gave you a smile. “I wish I sounded half as good.”

“I’m sure you do.” He said, hand on your shoulder. “I haven’t seen you in a couple of days, is everything okay?”

“Ma told me I’m not allowed to help anymore, she saw the bruises.” You said, “I’m fine, though.”

“He left bruises?” That crease between his eyebrows returned.

“He was mad. I would be too.” You muttered. “They got dumped into a zoo, literally. You were there. How did it feel?”

His face contorted, “Wrong, but that doesn’t excuse his behavior.”

“You’re right.” You sighed. “I never got to properly thank you for stepping in. I think he would’ve let go eventually, but—”

“You don’t need to thank me, (Y/n).” He interrupted, watching as you reached into your backpack.

“I do, actually.” You pulled out a neat plate of bread pudding that had been sitting flat on the bottom of your bag. When you looked up, you saw his parted lips. “You can’t ask how I know, but I heard that you really like bread pudding. I made enough for you and Tigris, or even if you wanted to share it with Lucy Gray.”

“You bake.” He said.

“On occasion. If you have any requests, I’ll be more than happy to make it for you.” You nodded.

He gave you a smile. “Thank you, (Y/n), but I don’t think I could ever ask that of you.”

“Please, don’t hesitate.” You told him. “I’ll see you around.”

You’d expected to see Coriolanus in the hallways next in passing, not the hospital later that evening. The mentors had gone to the arena with the tributes to do televised interviews, when rebels set off several bombs, killing multiple people. Both of the tributes from Six were killed, as well as the Ring twins—Diana and Apollo. While three mentors had been injured, that being Coriolanus, Androcles Anderson and Gauis Breen. The latter one lost both of his legs.

And of course, with the exit being wide open, four tributes went running for it. The tributes from One were dead before they stepped foot out the door, while the girl from Two had made it to the river. She made it over the wall, but died in the fall. While Marcus… he disappeared completely.

Sejanus was, thankfully, uninjured. The Academy canceled classes, so he came straight home. He didn’t really speak until the following day, when he suggested for the two of you to visit Coryo in the hospital. You’d agreed, because leaving your brother alone while he was that upset didn’t seem right.

Ma made more meat loaf sandwiches, because Coriolanus seemed to like them so much. When you visited him, he sat up in the hospital bed. Sejanus set Coryo’s book bag down on a table, while you took a seat. Together, the three of you enjoyed the sandwiches, while talking about anything but Marcus.

When you were done, you wished for him to get well soon. It would be the second time that he’d stay on your mind, this time lasting longer. You didn’t like that he was hurt, especially when he didn’t deserve to be. The war was between the districts and the government, not the people in-between that were being forced to help.

It didn’t seem to bother Coriolanus, though. He kept fighting for his tribute, and you tried to pry him from your mind. It was easier to do when the Games did finally come around, especially that first day. When the cameras started with a wide shot of the arena as a whole, and the fourteen tributes that stood in a circle around the center.

Then the camera changed, as it slowly zoomed in on twin steel poles, twenty feet high with a crossbeam. And at the center, Marcus hung from shackles at his wrists, beaten bloody, face swollen. When he moved his lips, it showed his broken teeth.

You raised to your feet the same time that Sejanus had. He was standing a few feet in front of you, next to Coriolanus, who was watching him carefully. The only reason why you were allowed to be in the hall was because you were there to support your brother, and you quickly understood why.

Sejanus rushed forward, grabbed an empty chair, and hurled it at the screen, where Marcus’s mangled face was. “Monsters!” He screamed. “You’re all monsters here!”

You watched in silence as he left the hall, leaving you there. No one had moved after him, and you were too stunned for a minute to chase after him. Coriolanus turned in his chair, where he saw you grabbing at your wrists, where the bruises were just healing.

“(Y/n)--” He was worried, shaking his head.

“He’s right.” You breathed, backing up toward the door. “What have we done?”

“Miss Plinth,” A hand had grabbed you.

You jerked away, eyes wild, lips parted. It was Dean Highbottom, and there was a warning on his face, telling you not to cause a scene. You didn’t want to be like your brother. Except, it was too late for him to step in, because the two of you were already too similar. Born from the same tree branch that split into two.

“Get away from me.” The words were harsh, “Don’t touch me.”

He let you go, as you followed after Sejanus. He wasn’t too far, just down the hall, where he was heaving heavy breaths, hands in fists at his sides. The look he gave you could’ve killed anyone, but his expression softened when he realized it was you.

You hugged him, standing there for what felt like forever. Marcus ended up dying later that afternoon by another tribute, presumably a mercy killing. Sejanus encouraged you to go home, telling you that he’d be right behind you in a few hours. You listened, told Ma that Sejanus was upset and that was it.

Well, that’s what you thought, at least. He didn’t come home that night, and as it got later, Ma was getting more worried. She asked you if you had any ideas where he could’ve gone, and you told her no. All you could do was suggest Coriolanus, because they were close, and Coryo seemed to care.

Ma took you to the Snow penthouse, where Tigris opened the door, dressed in a nice lavender dress. With Ma in hysterics, you explained the situation, and she invited you inside to sit in the living room. Tigris made tea, while her grandmother took a seat in a chair nearby. On the television was the arena, but it was too dark to see anything, even with the moonlight.

Tigris poured jasmine tea into cups on the table, while your mom tried to clean herself up with the handkerchief. “You’re such nice people. I’m so sorry to have dropped in on you like this.”

“Any friend of Coriolanus is a friend of us all.” His grandmother said. “Plinch, did you say?”

Your eyebrows twitched, Ma didn’t skip a beat. “Plinth. It’s Plinth.”

“You know, Grandm’am, she sent the lovely casserole when Coriolanus was injured.” Tigris said to remind her.

“I’m sorry. It’s too late.” Ma sniffed.

“Please don’t apologize. You did exactly the right thing.” Tigris patted her shoulder, looking up. Her eyebrows raised suddenly. “Oh, here’s my cousin now! Perhaps he knows something.”

You turned, finding Coriolanus gently shutting the door behind him. He gave you a gentle smile, but when you didn’t reciprocate, it dropped slightly. “Mrs. Plinth, (Y/n), what an unexpected pleasure. Is everything all right?” He asked, coming closer.

“Oh, Coriolanus. It isn’t. Not at all. Sejanus hasn’t come home. (Y/n) said he left the Academy this morning, and I haven’t seen him since. I’m so worried." She said. “Where can he be? I know Marcus being like that hit him—” She placed a hand on your knee, hand squeezing. “Them hard. Do you know? Do you know where he could be?”

“He was upset, ma’am. BUt I don’t know that it’s any cause for worry. He probably just needed to blow off some steam. Took a long walk or something. I’d do the same thing myself.” He tried to ease her.

“But it’s so late. It isn’t like him to up and disappear, not without letting his ma know.”

“Is there anywhere you can think of he might go? Or somebody he might visit?” Tigris asked.

Ma shook her head. “No. No. Your cousin’s his only friend.”

Coriolanus looked at you, where you hand your palms on your lap. “You know, if he’d wanted company, I think he’d have come to me first. You can see how he might have needed some time alone to… to make sense of all this. I’m sure he’s all right. Otherwise you’d have heard of it.”

“Did you check with the Peacekeepers?” Tigris asked.

Ma nodded. “No sign of him.”

“You see?” Coriolanus asked. “There’s been no trouble. Maybe he’s even home by now.”

“Perhaps you should go and check.” Their grandmother suggested.

Tigris gave her a look. “Or you could just call.”

Ma shook her head. “No. Your grandma’s right. Home is the place we should be. And I should let you all get to bed.”

“Coriolanus will walk you.” Tigris said.

“Of course.” Coriolanus nodded, you got to your feet.

“My car’s waiting down the block.” Ma told them, getting up as well. She smoothed down her hair. “Thank you. You’ve all been so kind. Thank you.” She reached back to grab her handbag, you looked away from Coriolanus to the television, where you stopped.

There, on the screen, a shadowy figure came out the barricade. The moonlight catering the side of his face, the features eerily familiar. He was carrying something in his hands, as he crossed the arena to Marcus’s corpse, where he stopped. Above laid a sleeping girl, the tribute that had killed your friend to keep him from suffering. 

“Shall I walk you to your car?” Coriolanus asked, Ma had begun toward him. “I bet you’ll find Sejanus in bed.”

“No.” The word was a whisper out of your mouth. “No, Coryo.” He’d turned his attention to you, mouth opening to speak, when you did it first. “Sejanus is in there.”

Coriolanus came closer, passing Ma. You reached out to grab him, hand on his shoulder. Sejanus knelt down, and tried his best to arrange Marcus in an appropriate manner. He rolled Marcus on his back, straightened his legs and tried to fold his arms over his chest. And then he stood up and held his hand out over Marcus’s body.

You couldn’t help the tears that sprung into your eyes.

“That’s your son in there? What’s he doing?” Asked their grandmother.

“He’s putting bread crumbs on the body.” You murmured, lips trembling. “So Marcus has food on his journey.”

“His journey where? He’s dead!”

“Back to wherever he came from.” Ma told them. “It’s what we do, back home. When someone dies.”

You swallowed thickly, a tear running down your face. A handkerchief materialized out of Coriolanus’s pocket, he passed it to you. “Thank you, Coryo.”

The phone rang a moment later. “Is the whole city up?” Their grandmother sighed.

“Excuse me.” Coriolanus said, holding your gaze for a moment, as he walked away. He turned his body away to speak.

You wiped your eyes with the handkerchief, and then folded it neatly to place back on the coffee table. You needed to leave, to go to Sejanus. Why hadn’t he mentioned this to you? Was it because he knew it was a stupid idea?

When Coriolanus came away from the phone, he sighed. “That was the Head Gamemaker. She’d like you to meet her at the arena to collect Sejanus, and I’m to accompany the both of you.”

“Is he in trouble?” Ma asked, eyes wide. “With the Capitol?”

“Oh, no. They’re just concerned with his well-being. Shouldn’t be long, but don’t wait up.” He told his family. 

The three of you shuffled out of the apartment after that, going down the elevator and through the lobby. Your parents’ car rolled up silently, and the three of you got inside, with Coriolanus requesting the arena. The Avox nodded, nad began to drive down the streets in a hurry.

“First time we saw the Capitol, it was night, like this.” Ma spoke quietly.

“Oh, yes?” Coriolanus asked, looking at you.

“Sejanus sat right where you are, saying, ‘It’ll be all right, Ma. It’ll be okay.’ Trying to calm me down. When we all knew it was a disaster,” Ma looked out the window. “But he was so brave. So good. Only thinking of his ma.”

“Hm. Must have been a big change.” Coriolanus said.

“Family and friends cut us off.” You told him, adjusting in your seat.

“No new ones to be made here. Strabo—their pa, that is—still thinks it was the right thing to do. No kind of future in Two. His way of protecting us. His way of keeping Sejanus and (Y/n) from the Games.”

“Ironic, really. Given the circumstances.” Coriolanus said. “Now, I don’t know what Dr. Gaul has in mind, but I imagine she wants your help getting him out of there.”

“I don’t know if I can. Him so upset and all. I can try, but he’ll have to think it’s the right thing to do.” She said, glancing at you. “I can’t let you go inside. You two have always been close, but I don’t want you in there.”

“I don’t want her to go inside, either.” Coriolanus chimed in. “Maybe there will be a different way.”

When you got to the arena, there were people already waiting outside of the doors. A dozen Peacekeepers, a good handful of Gamemakers, including Dr. Gaul. You approached tentatively, unsure about her presence. She didn’t always come off stable, that’s why you tried to keep your distance. 

Coriolanus noticed this, choosing to stand between you two.

“At least you’re punctual.” Dr. Gaul said. “Mrs. Plinth, I presume? And little (Y/n).”

You pressed your lips together. Ma nodded, “Yes, yes. I’m sorry if Sejanus has caused any inconvenience. He’s a good boy, really, It’s just he takes things so to heart.”

“No one could accuse him of being indifferent.” She agreed, looking at Coriolanus. “Any idea how we might rescue your best friend, Mr. Snow?”

“What’s he doing?” Coriolanus asked, ignoring the comment.

“Just kneeling there, looks like.” Dean Highbottom said, eyeing you. “Possibly in some kind of shock.”

“He appears calm. Perhaps you could send the Peacekeepers in now without startling him?” Coriolanus suggested.

“Too risky.” Dr. Gaul shot it down.

“What about putting his mother on a speaker, or a bullhorn?” He asked. “If you can darken the screen, surely you can manipulate the audio as well.”

“On the broadcast. But in the arena, we’d alert every tribute to the fact that there’s an unarmed Capitol boy in their midst.” Dean Highbottom said.

Coriolanus didn’t speak for a second. “What do you propose?”

“We think someone he knows needs to slip in as unobtrusively as possible and coax him out.” Dr. Gaul looked directly at you. “Namely, her.”

“No.” Coriolanus said immediately, shaking his head so hard that his blonde curls started to bounce. “She can’t go in there. I will.”

“Oh, no!” Ma cried. “It can’t be Coriolanus. The last thing we need is to put another child in danger. I’ll do it.”

“What we need is someone who can make a run for it, if necessary. If your daughter won’t, then Mr. Snow is the man for the job.” Dr. Gaul motioned to the Peacekeepers, who came over at her motion to dress him in body armor. “This vest should protect your vital organs. Here’s your pepper spray and a flash unit that will temporarily blind your enemies, should you make any.”

Coriolanus looked down at the bottle of pepper spray. “What about a gun? Or at least a knife?”

“Since you’re not trained, this seems safer. Remember, you’re not in there to do damage; you’re in there to bring your friend out as quickly and quietly as possible.” Dr. Gaul told him.

You started to shake your head, “Coryo, I can’t ask you to do this.”

“You aren’t asking.” He looked at you. “I’m volunteering.”

“He’s just a boy. Let me call my husband.” Ma begged.

Dean Highbottom gave Coriolanus a small smile. “He’ll be all right. It takes a lot to kill a Snow.”

You watched as Coriolanus’s face dropped, he sighed. And then he looked at you. “I’ll bring Sejanus out. Don’t worry.”

“Be careful.” You told him.

The Peacekeepers took him to the arena, where he disappeared inside. Your attention shifted to the news truck with the live feed of the tributes. It was dark though, too dark. You could barely make out anything, meaning you might as well had not been looking at all.

You were able to make out their figures, as Coriolanus slowly approached Sejanus to not scare him. They stood there, the minutes dragging on for what felt like forever, until they finally made the movement to leave, but not without Marcus’s body. They picked it up, made it a good deal across the arena before the other tributes came up to them. Less than a minute later, they came out.

And you were there in an instant, because you refused to leave without seeing either of the boys, while Ma went home. You had to push past the Peacekeepers to see Coriolanus and Sejanus, sitting on the tile. You crouched in front of them, hands on your knees.

“That was stupid of you, Sejanus.” You told your brother, looking at the blood pooling on the ground. “But you did what I couldn’t do.”

And then you looked at Coriolanus, who had his eyes on you already. You could see the scrapes on his face, his chin mostly, and the blood on his forehead. You reached out, he winced, but let you touch the area around the wounds.

“Thank you, Coryo.” You whispered.

His eyebrows furrowed. “Of course, (Y/n).”

From then on, seeing Coriolanus for longer than a few minutes at a time was rare. You looked forward to it each time. You saw him when Sejanus announced the Plinth prize, the sparkle in his eye at the mention of it.

He stopped by a couple days later, after Sejanus had gone to bed and Ma was cooking in the kitchen. You think he wanted to talk to Sejanus, possibly about the whole ordeal in the arena, but he had taken his sleeping medication. With the dosage he was on, there was no waking him.

You were sitting at the kitchen counter, swiveling side to side on the stool, talking to Ma as she baked her pies. You were about to go to bed, dressed in your pajamas, the only reason why you hadn’t was because you were waiting for her to put the peach pie in the oven first. At the sight of Coriolanus, the cuts on his face, and the smile on his lips, you’d clammed up.

“I was just heading off to bed.” You said to him, sliding from the chair.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay for a piece of pie, (Y/n)?” Ma asked you, worry on her face.

“I’ll have a piece tomorrow.” You told her. “Besides, I think Coryo will have a piece big enough for the both of us, isn’t that right?” You smiled.

He nodded. “Sure.”

“Goodnight.” You murmured, pausing long enough to let Ma kiss your forehead. You waved to Coriolanus, and then disappeared around the corner, where curiosity stopped you. 

Except, what they talked about while he enjoyed the blackberry pie wasn’t important, just about Sejanus and how the university would be better when he graduated. The real talk came after, when Pa wanted to see him. And Coriolanus went inside, closing the door behind him, which you then pressed your ear to.

“You look just like your father.”

“I hear that a lot,” Coriolanus said. “Did you know him?”

“Our business overlapped at times.” Pa said. “It’s striking, the resemblance. But you’re nothing like him, really.” He paused for a moment. “Nothing at all. Or you’d never have gone into that arena after my son. Impossible to imagine Crassus Snow risking his life for me. I keep asking myself why you did it.”

“I couldn’t let (Y/n) go inside. And he’s my friend.”

“No matter how many times I hear that, it’s difficult to believe. But even from the beginning, Sejanus singled you out. Maybe you take after your mother, huh? She was always gracious to me when I came here on business before the war. Despite my background. The very definition of a lady. Never forget it.” Pa said, there was another pause. “Are you like your mother?”

Coriolanus didn’t speak right away. “I’d like to think I am, in some respects.”

“In what respects?”

“Well, we shared a fondness for music.”

“Music, huh?”

“And I do think we both believed that good fortune was… something to be repaid… on a daily basis. Not taken for granted.” Coriolanus said.

“I’d agree with that.”

“Oh, good. Yes, well, so… Sejanus.”

“Sejanus. Thank you, by the way, for saving his life.”

“No thanks necessary. As I said, he’s my friend.”

“And (Y/n), is she your friend too?” Pa asked.

“Yes, she is.”

“She tells me that you’ve done a lot for her lately.” Pa said slowly. “You helped her at the zoo?”

“That was nothing.”

“I wouldn’t consider it so. She could’ve gotten seriously hurt if you hadn’t stepped in. You saw the bruises.” He said. “You’ve checked up with her since. And volunteered to keep her safe when Dr. Gaul suggested that she should go inside of the arena.”

“Well—”

“Coriolanus, in District Two, there are traditions we have for families like ours.” Pa said, your eyebrows drew together. “Wealthy families, I mean. I’m not sure if the Capitol has the same beliefs.”

“I’m sorry, I’m not following.” Coriolanus said.

“Arranged marriage.” 

You felt your blood run cold, but at the same time, the heat flamed in your face, licking your cheeks. You pulled your ear away for a second, thinking that you shouldn’t be listening in on this conversation.

“I’ve heard of families coming together in the Capitol, but it’s not very common.”

“It’s for more than just wealth, it’s to combine names as well.” Pa told him. “Snow is a grand name, don’t you think?”

“As is Plinth.” Coriolanus agreed.

“So, you understand what I’m implying then? What would your grandmother think?”

“I think that she wouldn’t agree to doing it so soon.”

“Of course not, it would happen after graduation, before university.” Pa said, “Will you give me your home phone? I’d like to discuss this with your grandmother.”

After that point, seeing Coriolanus would be painful… except, you didn’t see him the following day. In fact, you didn’t see him again at all. The next time his name was brought up in your house was with Sejanus’s, which was tied in with the words District Twelve and Peacekeepers.

“What?” You asked, coming around the hallway corner. Ma’s eyes widened. “Sejanus is where?”

“Oh, darling, you weren’t supposed to hear that. We wanted to tell you tonight.”

You shook your head. “Sejanus and Coryo went to District Twelve? Why?”

“I believe Coriolanus Snow signed himself up.” Pa told you. “As for Sejanus, it was the best we could do. He won’t be there long.”

“And what about Coriolanus?”

Pa made a face, tilted his head, “Twenty years, is what I was hearing.”

Your mouth dropped open, a reaction that you couldn’t stop in time. “Is that the same for Sejanus?”

“Yes.”

The only option you were given to keep in touch was letters. You could write to either of them whenever you wanted. Ma even told you that she was going to pack them food to send, stuff that they’d never be able to get in the districts, let alone Twelve.

With it being summer, you had plenty of time on your hands to write, but every time you picked up the pencil, the words escaped you. Everything that you’d been bottling to save for Sejanus seemed meaningless. So, you mostly replied to what Sejanus said, which could be a lot. He carried the conversations mostly, and you told him that you missed him. And you’d continue to miss him until he finally came back.

Which would never happen, not that you knew that at the time. It was a quiet day when the news reached your parents about what happened. That your brother had got caught up in rebel activities, which was treason. He was hanged without a trial, without a single letter sent home. For once, your family’s money couldn’t buy his way out of this one.

A black hole appeared in your chest, sucking in everyone’s words, their emotions. Ma couldn’t help you, even though she tried. She spent more time with you, trying to get you to speak, but all you wanted was to forget. Or to go back in time and tell Sejanus he needed to stop, that his actions would cost him his life.

Sejanus.

The boy you grew up with, the one you trusted with every secret, the one that kept you safe. Who you’d play with as a child when no one else would, who would help you with your homework when you fell behind. His sweetness, his hopefulness, his personality. He’s gone. He’s gone and you never got to say goodbye. 

All you gave him was half-assed letters. If you’d known that it would be the last time you talked to him, you would’ve done more. You would’ve said so much more. 

It was like almost every piece of him was gone, until the next wave of news came. While Sejanus would never get to leave District Twelve, Coriolanus had been honorably discharged. He was coming home to the Capitol. And with it being weeks after Sejanus’s death, it opened up a conversation that you thought was done for good.

The Snow’s were falling. You’d heard the news about Tigris and their grandmother almost immediately after Coriolanus had left. They had to sell their apartment, the nice penthouse you went to visit once. They couldn’t afford to keep it, so they downgraded, but the apartment lay empty.

Pa had decided that it was time to revisit the topic of an arranged marriage when he heard that Coriolanus was coming back. Ma really liked Coryo, because he was such a good friend to Sejanus. With your brother being gone, their attention had shifted a little, split between you and Coryo. Why keep it that way when there was a solution?

His grandmother agreed to it. It took a little bit of convincing, but at the mention of Pa buying the penthouse back as a gift, it made her cave. A letter was promptly sent to Coriolanus, who wasn’t to leave Twelve for another few days while they settled his paperwork. 

And his reply? ‘It would be my pleasure.’

As you straighten out the dress again, you look at the time on the clock that the train station has on display. Coriolanus should be arriving at any minute. It was requested that he were to be picked up by a Peacekeeper truck to take him to the Citadel, but Pa pulled strings, as he always does. He wanted your face to be the first thing that Coriolanus saw when he stepped off. 

You didn’t agree to this. You wanted to put this off for as long as possible. Sejanus chose to go to District Twelve to follow Coriolanus. They were close. He was the last one to have a conversation with your brother when he was alive. Besides, you’re set to marry him in a few short weeks. His suit measurements take place in two days.

A horn sounds, you look up from your polished shoes, the one scuf you managed to get this morning on the walk here. It was too late to turn around and change the shoes. Besides, they’re the only pair that matches this dress. A whole new outfit bought for Coriolanus, and he won’t even realize it.

The train pulls in the station, blowing cool air into your face. You take in a deep breath, trying to correct your posture. This will be the first time you’ve seen Coriolanus in months. Does he even know that you’re here to greet him?

It doesn’t matter. Once the doors open, you take a few steps toward them, trying to be casual. It’s hard to, with the hammering in your chest. You press your lips together, regripping the handbag, coming to a stop in front of the doors. The first few people that file out look like regular Capitol workers.

You’re too busy looking for Coriolanus’s blonde curls, that you almost miss him stepping out of the doors. His eyes flicker up for a moment, likely to collect his bearings, glancing over you.

You must register in his mind the next second, because he looks directly at you again, stepping off the train. You swallow, eyes stuck on his hair. Or rather, the lack of it. His head’s been shaved.

“(Y/n).” He smiles, “I wish I would’ve known you’d be here, I would’ve had something for you.”

“Your curls…” You murmur, face beginning to contort. If they got rid of his hair when he was enlisted, was the same done to Sejanus?

Coriolanus closes the distance between the two of you, pulling you into a tight hug. You press your forehead to his chest, hands gripping the clothes he’s wearing as you fight off the tears that threaten you. You don’t want to cry, you’ve spent so much of your time doing exactly that. For once, you want to be in control.

“I’m so sorry, (Y/n).” He says, “I can’t imagine how difficult it’s been.”

“I miss him.” The words are strained, you pull your head back, looking at Coriolanus. “I wish he would’ve told me what he was planning.”

“He’d never put you in danger.” 

“I know.” You back away from the hug. Coriolanus holds out his elbow for you to take, you begin to lead him to the car. “I trust you’ve learned a lot these past few months. Did you get to see Lucy Gray, at least?”

His face smooths out, this was not the right question to ask. He lets out a sigh, shaking his head. “I did, but her lifestyle is much different from mine.”

You nod. “You’re not district.”

“I’m not covey.” He corrects, a smile hinting at the corners of his lips.

“Oh, so she had you singing?”

“I wouldn’t say that.” He looks away, at someone passing by.

It’s quiet between the two of you for a moment. There was so much you wanted to say to him, but much like the letters to your brother, the words have left you. You chew on the inside of your cheek.

“You have something on your mind.” Coriolanus says, it’s not a question.

You sniff. “It’s um… It’s about Sejanus, just one thing I have to know before I can stop thinking about him.”

“He wouldn’t want you to do that.”

“It’s to put my mind at ease.” You stop outside of the car. “I know it’s not your tradition, Coriolanus, but were you able to…”

He nods. “I was.”

You meet his eyes. “The bread crumbs? They let you see his body?”

“He has food on his journey.” He tells you.

You breathe out a sigh. “Oh, good. Ma will be happy to hear that.”

Neither of you move for the car door, standing there, staring at each other. He eventually starts to shake his head. “(Y/n), I won’t do anything you don’t want me to.”

“It’s too late for that.” You tell him. “We can talk about it more later on, in a few days.”

Coriolanus reaches for the car door, motioning for you to go inside first. “I’ll be here when you’re ready.”

You don’t move to get inside. “Thank you for being such a good friend to my brother.”

He tilts his head. “You don’t have to thank me.”

“You’re the only piece of him I have left.” You shift on your feet, “I have to thank you.”

--

this was part of my 3k celebration!!

[strawbeerossi]

A Secret Girlfriend. (Spencer’s Version)

Idk this was a cute thing I thought of while listening to Enchanted while getting ready for bed.

My writing is so rusty but I hope y’all enjoy it. Maybe this’ll inspire me to write more, we shall see.

Word count: 1.1K

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“Spencer. You need to listen to the whole discography to appreciate her in all her glory.” Y/N said, looking to her boyfriend as he was raising an eyebrow and looking over all the Taylor Swift songs in a playlist that his loving girlfriend put together. “Do I? I don’t want to make it seem like I don’t respect her talent because I do, it just doesn’t seem like my thing. Scratch that, it isn’t my thing.” The male crinkled his nose, a smile on his face. It wasn’t like he wouldn’t listen, mainly because he was always happy to do whatever made Y/N happy.

“Try before you deny, Reid.” Y/N huffed while letting her arms cross over her chest, a smile still gracing her features, knowing it wouldn’t take much convincing at all. “I really think you’ll like her music. It’s comforting in a way, plus she is truly one of the most sweetest people ever. She’s got a beautiful voice too.”

The thing was, Y/N was right. Spencer did like her music because of the comfort associated with it. However, the comfort wasn’t because of the melodies, the beautifully crafted bridges, or even the impeccable vocals. It was because this music reminded him of his girlfriend. The way that she’d be screaming ‘Enchanted’ while taking a shower or how she’d make him dance with her to ‘Lover’ in their shared kitchen.

That comfort was something Spencer took with him everywhere, even to the point where he’d have one earbud in while listening to one of the random albums he’d decided on. Which of course, Y/N made sure to make him have all of the ‘Taylor’s Version’ of the albums that were out already, the woman playfully threatening to beat him with her shoe if she seen anything different.

It was currently a Friday at the office, a quiet day where they were mostly getting caught up with desk work and written evaluations. Spencer had his earbud in, the album of choice today being ‘Speak Now’, mainly in anticipation for the long awaited ‘Taylor’s Version’ that Y/N was over the moon about, it being her favorite album out of all the others. He wasn’t even paying attention, being so used to being at home and having some awful duets with Taylor, unable to stop his mouth from singing along to ‘Mine’. The song had caught a few glances, however Penelope was the one who actually coined on what he was singing.

The rest of the day, there was a little bit of light gossip between the rest of the team, mostly because none of that were really expecting Spencer to be singing any of the songs that blondie had. Which there was already a theory; Spencer had a girlfriend who they hadn’t met yet. Penelope was fully convinced of it. Someone was introducing this music to Spencer because he wouldn’t just willingly listen to something he wouldn’t normally indulge in.

Little did they know, that theory would be proved right a couple weeks later.

The highly anticipated Eras tour was something that everyone had to fight in the trenches for, Y/N being one of the people who spent her whole day in a waiting room, getting the best tickets she could get her hands on. There was a reason why she needed Spencer to listen to this music in the first place, the two going together after Y/N surprised him with the tickets, her excitement being too high for Spencer to even think of denying going.

He’d ended up telling Emily that he was going to see his mom, giving him that night without interruption or fear of having to make his girlfriend leave early because he had a case. Now, these rumours reached the unit chief, the woman not saying anything about her suspicions as she allowed Spencer the time off. Although she had a good idea that he’d be spending that time with his little secret girlfriend that he thought he could hide.

What Spencer didn’t anticipate though, was who had the seats right beside himself and Y/N. They’d made it fairly early, mainly because Y/N had floor seats so the two had to get there without the crowding when it came to getting to their seats. Which they’d made it to their spots without a hitch, something she needed to brag about because Spencer had said some sort of statistic of how there was a chance they wouldn’t have had to fight through crowds to sit down anyway.

“Was I right or was I right?” Y/N asked, a cocky smile on her face while she was sitting down with her boyfriend, her hand reaching over to hold his as she was bouncing with excitement. “I’m so glad you came with me tonight. I mean it. I was so worried I’d have to come alone or sell the other ticket. You’re the best.” She sighed in content while leaning over to kiss her boyfriend’s cheek.

Spencer was opening his mouth to speak before he was frozen in place after hearing two very familiar voices. “Oh come on, Garcia. I agreed to come with you tonight and you’re gonna bully me the whole night?” Luke asked, a laugh leaving his lips as he was trailing after Penelope, the blonde scoffing. “Of course I am. You know that I have been looking forward to this for weeks and with JJ being busy and Spencer being god knows where, you were my very last choice.” She spoke while trying to humble the male, although Luke was rolling his eyes with a smile gracing his features soon after.

Don’t look over. Don’t look over. Don’t—

“I love your dress!” Y/N gushed, leaning over to look over at Penelope, unknowingly calling attention to Spencer even though he was mentally begging for Penelope to not pay much attention to him. It wasn’t that he wanted to hide his girlfriend, far from it.. He just knew how the team was when it came to significant others and their coworker’s relationships. They were too nosy, as good as they meant by it.

“Thank you! Oh my god, your bottoms!” Penelope grinned while looking over at Y/N, although through her peripherals, she seen a very familiar face. Instead of calling attention to him just yet, she was instead keeping light conversation with the woman who was on the other side of her coworker.

It was later in the concert though, Y/N being fully captivated by the show in front of her as she was happily screaming along with lyrics and dancing, one hand in Spencer’s while she was keeping her gaze on the stage. That was when Penelope decided to say something, her elbow nudging Spencer’s side to get his attention before she was smiling from ear to ear up at him. “I knew it. You didn’t just randomly start listening to her!” She yelled over the music, making Spencer blush while laughing. “You picked a good one!” Penelope called soon after, to which Spencer was looking over at his girlfriend who was having the time of her life.

Yeah, yeah he did.

[multi-fandomsfreak]

Howdy Buckaroo 🤠

Can I request an MX x Demon S/O..

Like in the beginning before they started dating. MX wasn’t aware that Reader was a demon. Cause she looked like a normal human. [Little did he know that Reader was just in her human disguise.] And it isn’t until he’s about to kill them that Reader reveals that she’s a demon. It’s a really good relationship between the both of them. Plus one day Reader meets Lucas [The kid that MX trapped in the game.] Reader is really nice and kind to Lucas and Lucas is like “Your my mom now”..

Also Lucas will use Reader as a way to escape from MX. Like Lucas could be running for his life and he spots reader and he clings onto her and stick his tongue out at MX to like tease/mock him and he always gets away with it much to MX’s dismay.

All in All this a very funny relationship with the two of them..

Reader uses She/They Pronouns 💛

Have a good day/night 🤘

MX With A Demon!Reader

Howdy partner (sorry had to)! Thanks for the ask!

Loved writing this enemies to lovers fic. I did try to keep MX in character (when it comes to his association with Lucas at least) regardless enjoyed writing this. Hope you like it as well! ~Blaze/Dawn

Pronouns: She/They

Warning: ⚠️Mentions Of Attempted Murder + Torture⚠️

Requested: Yes/No

Characters: MX + Lucas Everett

Proofread: ❌

Credits: Art by elronnyx on DeviantArt + Banner by lovebeyourss on Pinterest

———————————

- Honestly he never expected to be trapped alongside a demon. When the two of you first met he wouldn’t have thought you were anything but human. Now that he thinks about it as time went on he should’ve seen at least some signs that you were a demon. But the last thing he would’ve thought about was what someone was or not. Plus surprisingly you were pretty convincing to even fool him to which he kind of gives you credit for it, begrudgingly. The only reason why he hadn’t noticed till then was that he was too focused on trying to kill you and when he actually did try to kill you he started to notice somethings about you that would be considered impossible for humans to have and then it just clicks for him ‘are they a demon?’ He questions himself as he stops his fist right in front of your face just leaving inches apart causing suspense for you.

- You couldn’t help but looking at him oddly, seeing confusion on his face was definitely a new thing for you. You saw him slowly lowering his fists before straightening his body looking at you with an unreadable face. Honestly you couldn’t tell if he was pissed or not he was seriously unreadable. Then after an awkward amount of silence between the two of you MX decided to speak up “how long have you been hiding this from me?” He said his voice was slightly demanding, wanting to know how long you had deceived him for. With a confused tone you asked in return “hiding what exactly?” “Are you actually a demon?” He told you what he meant. When he did ask you that you kind of froze on the spot. I mean you weren’t planning on telling him exactly but you had a feeling he would’ve figured out regardless. “Would my answer change your feelings?” You asked to which he just gave you a look as to say to just answer the question. Eventually you did answer his question and once you did you saw him relax a bit before letting you go, at least for now.

- Pretty much since he discovered you were a demon surprisingly he had mixed feelings about it. Obviously he was kind of pissed that you managed to fool him with your human disguise but at the same time he felt oddly excited that you were at the same time. He couldn’t explain why he felt that, he knows that you being a demon doesn’t change anything about you and your relationship with him. That’s when he actually questions himself about things between you and him. Maybe the two of you can be some sort of duo. Your power and his strength he considers those things a perfect duo. So despite yours and his history he decided to give you a chance.

- Initially it was awkward between the two of you when you two did at least try to get along with each other. Neither of you knew what to say to each other, there was one time he asked how your day has been before quickly realising the situation you were in which only made things more awkward. But eventually though the two of you did manage to get over it. He started asking more about yourself and actually kind of curious about you and your powers. As the two of you kept on chatting with each other the closer the two of you had got causing the two of you to develop some sort of friendship before turning into lovers.

- When you’ve managed to be more open about who you actually were I like to imagine him taking an interest in your demon form. He likes to tell you how pretty you look in it while he has you close towards him. Making you feel things as he continues enjoying your reactions. All that romantic shit.

- Ever since the two of you have developed your unique relationship he’s been a little more cautious about what he does around you as well as caring. He managed to separate his previous feelings for you and has now been replaced with love. You’ve pretty much earned his respect and he wants to earn yours in return. So he pretty much keeps what he usually does to himself. But sometimes he does let the facade slip sometimes but mostly towards other things or people, if the two of you have the chance to meet anyone or anything. Regardless if he tries his best to tone it down it doesn’t really change the fact that you know what he does but still you appreciate the effort from him. This is actually how you managed to meet one of his recent victims, a boy named Lucas.

- One day Lucas was going through the usual stuff which just so happens to be trying his best to avoid MX so nothing out of the ordinary considering what situation he got into. Then all of the sudden while he was on the run once again he managed into you. After composing himself he looked up at you wondering who or what he pumped into. At first he was a little scared of you. I mean he wasn’t even aware that someone besides him was here. He’ll probably be even more scared if he found you while you were in your demon form. However, despite that he had a feeling he could trust you. Being kind of desperate he kind of decided to use you as some sort of shield as both you and him saw MX coming. Upon noticing you he immediately stopped his chase with Lucas and chatted with you completely changing his demeanour surprising the little boy. Eventually though after him trying to convince you to let him get Lucas with you tell him that he promised to tone it down he eventually gave up and left the two of you alone.

- Upon noticing how you managed to deter his captor's attention away from him Lucas looked up at you with a slightly surprised face. “How did you do that?” Lucas quietly asked you, making you look down at him with a smile before explaining yours and MX’s relationship and history with each other. He couldn’t help but start to admire you in some sort of way. The way you're able to somewhat control MX despite who he was as a person. He started seeing you as some sort of mother figure admiring how strong you were. He wanted to be around you, he knew you wouldn’t harm him. He feels safe around which causes him to become more and more attached to you which you don’t mind. You're just glad he feels comfortable around you.

- Not going to lie when seeing you in your actual demon form Lucas is a little scared of you when you are in your demon form. Obviously he knows it’s still you when you're in that form; he knows it’s still the kind hearted you he knows this feeling or scared he’s experiencing is mostly just him being a child. A child being scared of normal things. Of course he does find you cool in a way and still admires you but he can’t help but feel uneasy when he sees you as a demon.

- When he can he tries his best to stay around you and cling onto you. He may be a kid but he’s pretty smart. Ever since you told him about your relationship with MX he likes to use it to his advantage for when he gets into some trouble with MX. It’s like when a child knows they're about to get into trouble so they run to their parents who will defend them. As soon as he spots you he immediately has a smile on his face and runs up to you before hugging you. Honestly MX doesn’t like it too much. Seeing the smug look on Lucas’s face as he gets told off by you while you're holding Lucas in your arms like he was a child of your own. Meanwhile Lucas is quietly laughing to himself at the fact that he had gotten away with this.

- Regardless, despite the things he goes through Lucas really does like you. Since he’s pretty much alone, he couldn’t help but get emotionally attached to you. He just wants to be around you, feeling safe in your arms like a mother comforting their child. He sometimes even refers to you as mum. He knows that you associate with MX but the fact that you're completely different from your partner gives him some hope. He likes it when he’s just laying in your arms calming him despite MX’s feelings about it. He couldn’t help but stick out his tongue at MX causing the buff plumber to scoff.

- Despite his overall feelings about Lucas, surprisingly he finds yours and Lucas' relationship somewhat cute. Of course this doesn’t change how he feels about Lucas or what he did to him but he guess he could let things like this slide for once. He knows that you and him don’t really have the same morals and knows he probably can’t convince you to stop seeing you forming an attachment to Lucas yourself. He just lets Lucas go and talk to you whenever he isn’t doing his usual stuff to him. You seemed happy with it as well so that’s also why he does it. Despite everyone’s history you all somewhat get along.

———————————

[kikithegr8]

Rant for my cyber gangsters…

So I had an anonymous person try to tell me I’m racist against Asians and then say something about me not liking Lucas because I’m racist or whatever. I deleted the post because honestly I felt like entertaining it was beneath me but now that I have some time I wish I hadn’t because this seems like an opportunity for a teaching moment…

So first of all these characters aren’t real. If someone doesn’t like a character it’s real weird when people get offended. Imagine if in real life we all had the same type. A lot of y’all would be single because you’re bitter and can’t compete so lucky for you that’s not the case.

If I’m completely honest I’m less likely to choose white characters simply because I’m less likely to relate to white characters culturally. LITG S3 Bill is probably the antithesis of what I’d be interested in, guys like Gary, and Eddie are physically attractive, but I’ve never had a white guy as my end game. That being said if there are white people who are not interested in people of color that’s fine by me but keep it real. Don’t try to insult all characters of color just acknowledge your preference.

As it relates to Lucas I initially thought he was gorgeous and humble and rich and bougie in a good way. I like to get dressed up and go to nice restaurants IRL so I thought we’d be perfect together. He was a sophisticated doctor with a little edge to him. Plus he has a bike and is outdoorsy ish but I think would be down for glamping. I’ve been around people where my personality is too much, and I’ve been around people where I feel like I’m not enough as a person and that is okay, those are not my people. Lucas triggered something that made me feel like I wasn’t enough. Idk if it was when I tried to kiss him after we ate and he rejected me, or that I wanted children and he didn’t, or if it was that I felt pressure to take him back when he returned but something didn’t sit right with me. He was my end game but I took the money. The issues I had with Lucas I don’t associate with him being Asian.

The only complaint I have against Jin is that I told him I messed around in casa, he saw me mess around in casa several times and he just accepted it. If he had a little more self respect about him I’d still be on the fence but that made me lose interest. Of course if I didn’t fool around in the first place we wouldn’t be here so my violation is 10x worse than his. There are people complaining he led Sienna on. He’s 22. He was being nice. Maybe even keeping his options open. I don’t care. As a woman, always check to see if your man keeps that same energy when different people are around. If he switches up, that’s not your man. Sienna is dumb.

I can’t look at someone and tell whether they are Brazilian, Spanish, or Puerto Rican. I can’t look at someone and tell whether they are from Niger, or Morocco, or Zimbabwe. I can’t look at someone and tell whether they are Chinese, Vietnamese, or Japanese. Someone tried to tell me I’m racist against East Asians (probably the same person). Sweetie you are vastly overestimating my geographical capabilities.

Anyway let’s breakdown the definition of racism, shall we?

I don’t bother to check the ancestry for Black or white people, I don’t think Black or white people care honestly. I’m quite sure I’ve used someone with Irish ancestry to represent someone who actually had Scottish ancestry or someone with Nigerian ancestry to represent someone with Ghanaian ancestry. I know I’ve used someone with Mexican ancestry to represent someone with Brazilian ancestry and someone with Filipino ancestry to represent someone with Japanese ancestry. So if I’m treating everyone the same irrespective of race does that meet the definition of racism? I don’t discriminate.

For the anonymous people out in social media who make ridiculous accusations about people’s character, I’m not sure what your goal is. If you are out here trying to hurt feelings, let it be known 1. I’m not out here seeking validation from people who aren’t valid. In other words people who are anonymous bullies. I’m grown grown. Idk what in the after school special is going on but I don’t do bullies. 2. I’m real big on self awareness. There is not much anyone can say to massage or bruise my ego. 3. I have to actually respect you for your opinion to mean anything. Someone actually respectfully reached out and I decided that was enough for me to pull back from doing face claims (the boy I pulled for Jin is fine too, but whatever, noted. I’m just trying to bring joy by sharing pics of cute boys but if it’s causing discomfort then I’m gonna chill on that). 4. The way you interact with people is so much more of a reflection of who you are than who they are. So why you are out here anonymously making crazy accusations what does that say about you? Perhaps your time would be better spent unpacking that.

Keep trying me if you want to, please know I am not moved nor bothered.

Otherwise if someone wants to engage in a conversation or has respectful constructive criticism please respond. I genuinely am interested in your perspective and want to see what you have to say. I know I’m not perfect. I have plenty of room to grow. I love interacting with people from different ethnic, racial, or national backgrounds because I can learn from different perspectives.✌🏽🫶🏽

[ice-cap-k]

Just Gold: CH2

Soooo, I forgot to cross-post here that I've written a chapter 2 for the team ranchers au fic I wrote up back in October. Tango's a dragon. Jimmy's a bird. Good fun.

Read it on AO3: Just Gold

Chapter 1 on Tumblr

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Jimmy was a Phoenix.

That's not to say he was very good at being a phoenix, but that was what he was. Phoenixes were supposed to be all about death and rebirth and eternal life. It’s hard to be good at the ‘eternal life’ portion of the job, though, when he keeps dying all the time. 

Not like most phoenixes, though. There was almost never a cycle of burning to ash at a ripe old age and emerging as a newly hatched chick from the ashes. Even when he literally burned to death. He never got that far. It was more like he just woke back up having never aged or unaged a day. That wasn’t normal for his kind, but he supposed that after so many repeated deaths so close together over such an extended period of time, he must have somehow stunted his growth. Ungrowth? Aging, maybe? Whatever it was supposed to be, it was messed up for him. 

It had its ups and downs. Dying wasn’t necessarily pleasant, but at least he still came back. He always came back… eventually. And unlike other phoenixes, he didn’t have to deal with the crippling discomfort of old age, or the helplessness of reverting back to a chick. But he also could never grow back the brilliant plumage that people associated with his kind. The bright yellow feathers he was left with made him look no different than a larger than average canary. 

To be honest, he was a little self-conscious about it. 

It was partially his fault, as much as he hated to admit it. He was pretty accident-prone. Bird brains, ya know? It was hard living in a world with glass windows. You’d think after all these years he would have learned a thing or two about self-preservation.

But here’s the thing about immortality, when you know that nothing can actually do any permanent damage, you start to lose sight of the inherent threat. And when you don’t notice a threat, it’s easy to underestimate the world around you. And to overestimate yourself.

Case in point, Jimmy’s newest friend was a dragon. 

Dragons are meant to be big scary beasts with razor-sharp claws and fangs. They were meant to be merciless, and prideful, and very very dangerous. 

It never really occurred to Jimmy that Tango could be all of those things… Well, at least not until he watched Tango burn over a dozen people to ash. So yeah, now he supposes Tango could be all those things. 

But what he first saw when the golden dragon came crashing through his nest at the base of the mountain, after the initial annoyance began to fade, was someone suffering from the kind of bad luck he was all too familiar with. Someone who wouldn’t come back from the fraying edges of death like he would have.

Fortunately, Jimmy was still a phoenix. 

He had a long memory that reached back eons across his many previous lives. And in one such life, there had been an old ranch not too far from here. One large enough that the dragon could hide indoors. One that was out of sight of the nearby village. One that Jimmy knew had been left vacant. 

Someone with a healthy dose of self-preservation probably would have kept their distance until the dragon awoke, so as not to startle it into attacking. Or maybe they would have pointed the poor beast in the direction of shelter and been on their way. If they were feeling really reckless, they might have tested to see if the dragon would have let them help it get up, or bandage some of its many wounds. 

Not Jimmy. If Tango had burned him or clawed him off or rolled over and crushed him, he would have just come back anyway. And cleaning wounds or helping the dragon leverage itself up wasn’t in the phoenix’s wheelhouse at the moment. Tango was so big compared to the phoenix that Jimmy could fit in the palm of his hand comfortably. And what would he stem the blood flow with? His feathers? He didn’t have nearly enough to go around. 

Of course, Tango didn’t do any of those things when he woke up. He had done nothing to hurt Jimmy, except maybe the Phoenix’s pride when the dragon tried to shoo him away like a common pigeon. 

And while he didn’t have to go with Tango, Jimmy wanted to go back to the ranch with the dragon. The old building housed a lot of fond memories. That was one reason. The other was Tango himself.  

The truth was, Jimmy had been setting up his nest at the base of that mountain because he knew that people were nearby. Maybe not necessarily a giant gold and red dragon, but the humans of the village weren’t too far away. Phoenixes worked best in a flock. Especially Jimmy. He could handle being on his own, sure, but he thrived amidst others. And what a ‘flock’ looked like to Jimmy had changed over the lifetimes. Sometimes that meant coexisting with humans. Sometimes it meant flying with large groups of your more typical, non-magical birds. Sometimes a flock was only him and one other, and sometimes it was a large group of friends and family. He had been looking for his next flock. Had been planning on finding a nice family to settle down with for a while and play the part of a typical pet canary. 

And then came Tango.

Really, dragons and phoenixes were pretty similar if you think about it. Depending on how you define immortality, both species were technically immortal. Dragons could live forever as long as they weren’t killed. And sure, Jimmy died all the time, but death wasn’t permanent for him. A phoenix couldn’t breathe fire, but they still had the same fire in their belly that dragons did. They both could fly. They both could burn. They both could bleed gold…

According to that train of thought, dragons were practically big scaly phoenixes in their own right.

And as the saying goes, birds of a feather flock together.

______________________________________________________________

“Tango Tango Tango TANGO TANGO TANGO!!!”

The lump of stone is heavy in Jimmy’s claws. He’s not used to feeling so imbalanced while flying. Not for this long. He kept having to remind himself that it would be worth the effort once he saw the look on his buddy’s face. 

That doesn’t make the uneven strain on his wings better, though. It’s so bad, he nearly missed the window entirely. The backside of his wing brushed against the wooden frame. A stray splinter caught at his coverts. There’s a painful twinge as a few feathers are pulled loose and he over-corrects, sending him spiraling to the floor inside. 

The little bird lands in a messy heap on the floorboards, losing his grip on the pretty rock. It went rattling across the floor in front of his beak. 

He tested his toes, gingerly flexing each one to make sure he hadn’t broken anything in the crash. Nothing appeared out of place outside of a few wisps of broken yellow feathers. That would probably leave a bruise or two, but nothing more severe. Jimmy wasn’t about to die this time around. Even the rock looked completely intact after its little tumble.

He had landed in the old ranch house kitchen. It looked warm and inviting in the late evening haze, despite the unused furniture strewn across the floor. The smell of smoke still clung to the walls and floor. Enough time had passed that the uncomfortable burn of brimstone had begun to fade. The ruined walls had been stripped away and patched up with new oak and spruce timber. The smell of the hewn wood boards mixed with the lingering scent of ash. It almost reminded him of sitting alongside a nice warm bonfire under the stars on a cool summer night.

“Tango?”

The dragon wasn’t answering, but something was creaking nearby. Floorboards groaned. Hinges squeaked. Jimmy had a good idea of where his friend could be, but he wasn’t about to go flying around indoors while carrying that stone around. So he hopped to his feet and took flight. The kitchen floor was as good a place as any to leave it for now. 

“Can you hear me, buddy? I brought you something?”

With the slightest shift of his wingtips, he banked around an open archway into the living room. Sure enough, there was Tango. The dragon had his back to him. His claws scraped at the inside of a makeshift hopper he had managed to fashion out of an old shovel head and a little fire-breath metalworking. Looked like something had gotten stuck in the sorting system again. 

“I can’t believe this. This is ridiculous,” Tango was saying as Jimmy landed on his favorite perch; one of the ridges of the dragon’s right horn. It was just so nice and warm; glossy and easy to nestle against. It shifted as Tango tried to look up at him, his head tilting to compensate for the slight weight change. “Oh! Hey Jimmy.”

“Hey, I’m back. How’s the progress coming along?”

A wisp of smoke wafted out of Tango’s nostrils. He turned back to the funnel in his claws. “Well, it was going pretty fantastic for a while there until this thing decided to jamificate the whole operation.” Jimmy tightened his grip on the horn as the dragon beneath him let out a sigh. The delicate swirls of smoke turned into a turbulent stream as he breathed in then out. “These quick fixes just aren’t cutting it.”

“Quick fixes?” Jimmy chuckled. “Tango, you know you can take all the time in the world, right? Automatic sorting will be nice and all, but we don’t absolutely need it right now. We barely got the house patched up. The barn’s not even rebuilt yet.”

If anything, the sheer amount of work that he had managed over the last few days had been impressive. With the barn gone, the two had taken shelter in the farmhouse. In that time, Tango had thrown himself into making the place as easy to live in as possible. The ruined portions of the wall had been stripped away and replaced. A door had been renovated so that there was an entrance large enough for the dragon to pass through. Bedrooms had been ransacked and rearranged so that they had a place to sleep at night. For Tango, that meant a padded stretch of floor space for him to curl up in. For Jimmy, a simple shelf with a nest he had put together all on his own.

And then there were the projects! The redstone projects were in every room. The sorting system, a trash dispenser, a line of automatic cooking furnaces. Whatever materials he and Tango had gathered into a tiny hoard while the dragon had been grounded were gone, put to use in whatever idea his friend had thrown himself into. 

But they hadn’t touched the barn. 

Jimmy could tell that the memory of the attack was still a bit of a sore spot for Tango. Sometimes, the barn served as a reminder. Even after all the bodies had been cleared away. 

The stream of smoke coming from Tango’s nostrils petered out. He could hear the dragon's claws clicking against the shovel head as it turned in his claws. Gold wings still trussed up in their splints stretched ever so slightly, nearly knocked over a dusty grandfather clock they had shoved into the corner of the living room. The contact was enough to make Tango wince beneath him. 

“You’re right,” Tango relented. He placed the funnel down on the hardwood floor at his feet. It rolled unevenly away to bump against one of the chests. “There’s not enough room for us here.” 

The feathers along Jimmy’s shoulders puffed up. “Us? Excuse me. I find this place rather cozy. I think what you meant to say is that there’s not enough room for the two of us.” He almost tented his wings to make himself bigger. A show of fluffed feathers and bravado as if he could square up against the massive creature beneath him, but his friend wouldn’t be able to see that. Not as long as he was perched on the horn. “I’m a big man. The big man!” 

 There was a jolt below as Tango shook his head. The sudden movement knocked Jimmy’s feet out from under him. With a shrill cry, he went tumbling down the glittering gold slope of Tango’s head until he skittered to a halt hanging halfway from his nose. Yellow wings stretched and pressed against scales as his feet dangled uselessly over open air. “TANGO! HELP!”

“You know you can fly, right?” the dragon huffed, a smile evident in his voice. Still, he reached up and scooped Jimmy up in his claws. 

“Y-yeah. Of course I do,” he sputtered, adjusting his jostled feathers back into place. It took a bit of time, considering how ruffled they were from the tumble. The wave of embarrassment washing over him did not help. 

“Sure thing, buddy.” The corners of Tango’s mouth pulled up for a moment, before his head swung back and forth to take in his surroundings. “You’ve got a point, though. This place isn’t big enough for us. I should just settle down until my wings finish healing. It’s not like I have to wait much longer.” As if to illustrate his point, he shuffled his wings against his back. He didn’t recoil from the movement. His eyes didn’t crinkle at the corners from strain. He seemed fine. 

The only apparent problem was that there wasn’t enough room to risk spreading them out. Just that little motion knocked a faded family portrait off the wall with a thumb claw. 

It had been more than Tango had been able to manage without wincing in pain a couple of weeks ago. The membrane between the wing fingers had healed over a while ago. Dull scars pitted the skin, stubborn reminders of how badly the dragon had been hurt. The bones were less obvious, but beneath the scales and muscle, they were well on their way through the healing process. Tango had been good about keeping them still and letting them mend. And when he had been tempted to put pressure on them early and take a risk, Jimmy had made sure he was there and ready to give him a solid peck upside the head to chase those thoughts away.

“You… you want to leave?” The question hung in the empty air. There was a moment of silence. Not even the grandfather clock ticked with the passing seconds. They had never bothered to wind it.

Eventually, Tango shrugged. “It’s an option. Beats accidentally busting this joint up. Feels like I’m trying to put a square peg through a round hole, and I’m the peg.” He held his claw up to his head for Jimmy to hop back up onto his horn. The small bird gratefully settled down against his perch while Tango reached down to scoop the picture off the hardwood floor. He watched the two smiling faces centered in the frame as Tango hung it back up on the wall. One a woman. One a man. Both familiar to the phoenix.

When the dragon’s claws pulled away, the frame was crooked. “This place is made for humans.” There was a sad note in his voice. Something distant. Something angry. A shiver ran down Jimmy’s spine as he thought of men on fire. People rendered down screaming smudges of light on a dark night.

He didn’t like where that train of Tango’s thought seemed to be going.  “Or human-sized people,” Jimmy blurted in a rush, trying to bring the conversation around to something more his speed. Something that didn’t involve Tango leaving. Or humans. “Or me-sized birds.”

“Or that,” the dragon agreed with a snort. 

“You know, we could get back to finishing up the barn. It was a lot of fun. You know, before it burnt down… And there was a lot more room for the both of us.” 

Tango’s head swayed thoughtfully. Jimmy rocked along with him, shifting with the movement instinctually. “Yeah, we could do that,” Tango hummed. They turned towards the door. “That’s another option.” 

“I say we just focus on getting the roof back up and then worry about the walls after.”

“That’s not going to protect us from much.”

“I’m not concerned.”

“Well of course you’re not, mister ‘I can’t die.’”

“Hey, I don’t appreciate that coming from you, mister ‘immortal.’ You very well know I can die.”

“That doesn’t count.”

“EXCUSE ME?!”

By now, Tango had lumbered back into the kitchen. It was the only way he could go to get to the only door big enough for him to fit through. There was the stone in the middle of the floor, right where Jimmy had left it. “Here I am, all excited, bringing you a gift, even,” he twittered, alighting from his perch. This time, the little bird landed on the floor with much more grace and intention next to the glittering red gift. “And you’re bad-mouthing me. I will not stand for such slander.”

Jimmy watched with satisfaction as Tango’s eyes glittered. He had just noticed the large chunk of redstone. “Wait-a-minute…”  The dragon had to hunker down, practically resting his head on the floor so that they were eye level. “Where did that come from?”

“I found it.” Pride warmed Jimmy over from head to tail tip. Chest feathers puffed out as he pushed the rock forward with one foot. “Had to go pretty far out for it to. We’ve picked the nearby valley and mountain clean, but I know how much you’ve been wishing for more. You practically used up everything we were using for your temporary hoard, so I brought you back the biggest piece I could find.”

There had been more past the villages, but Jimmy hadn’t been physically equipped to tackle an entire ore vein, even if it was on the surface. Mining was out of the question, and what was readily available was usually no bigger than fine grains of dust. What was he supposed to do with dust? Sweep it up with his wings? But this! This he could bring back on his own.

“And it’s for me?!?”

He gave the rock another tap with his clawed toes. It rocked, then rattled and rolled to its side. “Well, I sure ain’t gonna use it.” 

“Oh my gosh. I don’t even know what to say.” With careful claws, Tango plucked the stone off the floor. He held it gingerly, like he was afraid he was going to break it. Knowing Tango’s strength, it was entirely possible he could have crushed it to dust if he wanted to. “Thank you, Jimmy.”

It felt good. It felt good to see Tango smile like that. “Don’t worry about it. Just use it towards something cool, ya hear?”

He nodded. “I don’t even know what I’d do with it. Or if I’d even do anything with. I think I’m just gonna hold onto it for now.” Then, to Jimmy’s horror, he tucked it into one of the folds of his bandages.

“No!”

Tango whipped his head around, eyes wide, pupils shrunk down to hairline slits, thrown utterly off guard by Jimmy’s outburst.“What- What? What??  WHAT?!?”

“No. No. NO,” he repeats unhelpfully. “You’re not putting it there,” he chirped. “That’s just asking to aggravate your injury. I’m not letting you go and do that.”

The phoenix hopped towards the dragon, who scrambled away with wide eyes. Considering their size difference, it would have been a comical sight to see the little bird scaring the dragon. But Jimmy wasn’t laughing. He was too concerned for that.

“But I-”

“No buts!”

“Fine!” Tango still looked a bit baffled as he pried the rock back out from a layer of gauze. 

It had only gone beneath the first layer of clean linen. There were plenty of layers that would have separated the rock from skin and scale. There were also plenty of spare bandages to replace it if necessary. As far as the phoenix was concerned, it still wasn’t worth the risk.

“I’ll just stash it in my nest or something instead,” the dragon huffed. “Just gotta find a spot where I won’t roll over and crush it first.”

“You don’t have to do that. Why don’t we find you something to help you carry it? A safe place to put it until you decide.”

The sharp scales making up the ridge of his eye raised in a way that Jimmy thought looked uncomfortable, what with all those sharp edges. Tango made no sign that it was uncomfortable in any way, though. “You’ve got something in mind?”

“I’ve got an idea.” Jimmy bounced forward, craning his neck so he could see past his friend through the kitchen door. There was a trapdoor in the hallway ceiling. Cobwebs dusted the corners and the wood looked warped and faded from years of disuse, but it was still there. “If memory serves me correctly, I bet ya there’s something in the attic we can use.”

“The attic?” Tango turned, following Jimmy’s gaze to the hatch in the ceiling. “Oh no way. I’m never going to fit through that.”

“That’s why you’ve got a big strong man like me to help.” With a sweep of his wings, Jimmy took off. “Mind lifting the door for me a smidge, though?”

He was too busy circling the hall to get a good look at Tango’s expression, but he could still hear his friend’s voice. “Will you even be able to see up there?” 

“Sure I will.” 

A golden tail snaked its way to the ceiling, pushing the trapdoor open a few centimeters. That was all Jimmy needed. With a twitch of his tail and a twitter, he pulled his wings in tight and swooped through the opening. Almost immediately, he crashed headfirst into the long thin wires of an old bird cage.

Bam!

“What was that?! Is everything alright?”

“Fine! It’s fine Tango!” It was fine. There were a few more bruises added to the number he already had from crashing into the kitchen, but his wings weren’t broken and he hadn’t hit his head. Another potential death avoided. Another win in his book. 

The birdcage was ruined, though. It had toppled to its side after the impact and rolled into a forgotten rat trap. He looked it over as he settled feathers back into their places. There were massive dents in the wires now. One gap was big enough for someone his size to easily pass through.

The sight sent a twinge through his chest. What a shame. 

“Could you hold the door for me, Tango? I need a minute to look around.”

“Yeah. I got it.”

“Thank you!”

Well, there was no reason to dwell on an old cage. It hadn’t been used in years anyway. Instead, Jimmy turned his attention to the rest of the attic. Trunks and boxes and chests, oh my. The space was piled high with more junk than he recalled. The abandoned items were dusty from years of neglect. It made what should have been a brightly colored, overstuffed room feel dull and hollow. 

Again, there was no reason to dwell on that now. The old inhabitants were long gone. It was him and Tango now. So Jimmy flew, passing over a dress form with a long wedding gown and a crate painted with a hot air balloon. He instead began his search with the piles of boxes on the other side of the room.

_____________________________________________________________

Night had fallen.

Jimmy felt nice and snug in his nest. It was perched in the Y-bend of the support beams holding up the newly built barn roof. If you could call it that. Slats of timber had been screwed together and raised onto the supports at an angle. There weren’t any shingles or insulation to keep the water out if it were to start raining. There definitely weren’t any walls. Tango was right, it wouldn’t protect them from much. It wasn’t much, but it was still a lot for a day’s work.

At least it was a nice night outside. Almost like they were sleeping under the stars. The twinkling lights were just visible through the spaces where walls would eventually go up. And it was spacious. Jimmy didn’t have to try very hard to coax his friend into sleeping there for the night. He had a feeling that the dragon hadn’t been excited about spending another night cooped up in one of those too-small bedrooms. In a show of solidarity, he had even helped the dragon carry his nest out. That is, if ‘helped’ meant ‘asked Tango to do it.’ What could he say? Tango could carry the whole thing in his claws. If Jimmy had tried doing it himself, he would have had to carry it twig by twig.

Still, the dragon hadn’t seemed to mind. He was in good spirits, curled up beneath Jimmy in the bedding they had pulled from the linen closet. The leather coin pouch Jimmy had found in the attic was tied around one of his wrists, the redstone rock nestled inside.

“Okay, my turn,” he was saying. With one claw, he traced a line from one star to another, to another, and another as if connecting the dots. 

Jimmy followed the motion, trying to find a pattern in the movements. “Looks like a triangle with a line down the middle. Is that supposed to be one of your hoppers?”

Tango shook his head. “I was going more for a cross shape. I’m also ninety-nine percent certain that it’s a real constellation I’m pointing at. Come on. Try again.” He traced the line of stars once more. Jimmy’s head twitched, following its path intently. Left, right, center, a small swipe up, and then a long trail down. A real constellation, huh? He’d never been very good with those. He wasn’t some lowly pigeon that had to worry about keeping track of directions.

Wait a minute…

“Is it a bird?”

“Ding ding ding! We have a winner!” With a grin, Tango knocked his tail into the base of the Y-beam. The shockwave made Jimmy’s nest shiver around him. “Pretty sure it’s supposed to be a hawk or something, but I don’t remember the name of it.”

“Well, don’t look at me,” he said, pushing the twigs back into place. “I wouldn’t know the first thing about that sort of thing.”

“Really?”

Jimmy peered over the edge of his nest. There was Tango, staring up at him with red eyes brimming with curiosity. His friend tilted his pointy head as if seeing him from a new perspective would help him understand. “Well, yeah,” he mumbled. “I’ve never really needed it.”

“Then how’d you navigate?”

He didn’t. Jimmy shrugged his wings, a motion that probably wasn’t visible to the dragon below. Not over the ledge of his nest. “Usually my other flock mates handled that.”

“Flock?” 

“I’m a bird, Tango. That shouldn’t be so weird.”

“I don’t know! You’re the first Phoenix I've met. For all I know, you’re all meant to be hermits.” With that, Tango pushed himself up to a seat in his makeshift bed. Bandaged wings trailed at his sides as he craned his neck back to get a better look at Jimmy. “Besides, you’ve never talked about a flock before. Where are they now?” Scales scraped the bare dirt as the dragon worried at it with his claws. “I’m not keeping you from them, am I?”

“Of course not,” Jimmy exclaimed. He almost laughed at the thought. “Far from it.” 

Those big red eyes narrowed at him. “I don’t understand.”

 Jimmy wanted nothing more than to sink further into his nest out of sight. Of course Tango wouldn’t get it. It's not like Jimmy had ever talked about it. It was his own fault of course, but had his reasons. The main one being that it had simply never come up in conversations. Another one was that he had gotten his hopes up about Tango sticking around, and with it came the fear that if he voiced his feelings about flocks, it would only make things awkward and ensure Tango would leave.  Now he wasn’t sure what to do with the sudden rush of self-consciousness. “Sorry. I guess this is kind of confusing. What I mean is, I don’t really have a flock right now. Not anymore.”

“Oh…”

A shadow passed over Tango’s eyes and Jimmy realized that his wording probably hadn’t been the best. “It’s not like anything bad happened to them,” he quickly added, trying to set the record right before his friend got the wrong idea. “It’s just, every so often, time passes and you’ve gotta move on. Kinda comes with the territory of being tangentially immortal when everyone else around you isn’t, you know?”

Tango blinked. “So it’s not a flock of phoenixes, like you?”

“Nah.” Jimmy waved his question off with a flick of his wingtip. “I haven’t flown with my kind for a very long time. I guess flock might be the wrong word for what I’m trying to say. I’ve lived with flocks made up of birds, sure, but I’ve also stayed with people. Humans. All sorts. Could probably call it family, or friends, but ‘flock’ feels right. Like it works the best for what I mean.”

He expected Tango to start shooting off more questions, or to laugh at him. Maybe even squint at him with those brightly colored eyes as if that could help the dragon figure him out. To his surprise, his friend instead looked back at the farmhouse through one of the many gaps in the barn’s foundation. His wings slumped to the ground as he let himself fall back into his bedding. “Humans, huh?” While it was technically a question, there was no hint of curiosity in his voice. If anything, it sounded strained.  

The two sat in silence. Tango stared out at the other building, tail-tip twitching, and Jimmy picked himself over to the edge of his nest, not sure what to do or say.  Now he’d gone and done it. This was exactly the type of reaction he had been trying to avoid. At least since the barn burned down. The little bird wasn’t sure what else to do, so he decided to fill the silence himself.

“They’re not all like that, buddy. I swear. And the ones I hung out with…” Jimmy found his own gaze drifting towards the barn house as well. It had changed so much but was still so similar. “They’re long gone. I promise you. And even if they weren’t, I can also promise you that they weren’t the type to go around harassing folks like us.” He blinked and saw green eyes and a cheeky smile in the empty space behind his eyelids. “Well, not like those fools who showed up here,” he corrected himself. “Harmless. Good people living a good life and I was there helping them out. Rooting ‘em on-”

“Hey, Jimmy.”

Jimmy blinked. He shrank down against his nest a little lower. “Yeah?”

Tango didn’t look at him. Just kept his eyes locked on the farmhouse, his head propped up on a lump of fabric. “Is that how you knew about this place? When you first found me? Is this your human friends’ home?” 

The little bird sighed. “Yeah.”

“What were they like?”

Oh. “Um, really nice actually,” Jimmy twittered. “There were two of them. You know that portrait in the living room, right?”

“Mmhmm.”

“That was them. The man, the- uh- the one with the green streak in his hair, he liked to annoy me. Kept reminding me I was small and rubbed it in my face, but he also threatened to punch a guy in the face for almost breaking my wing. He had a big head, but he was a really good friend…

“And the woman with the pink hair, that was his wife. She was the one who found me. I had just gotten tossed around in a nasty storm. Wasn’t pretty. I was probably just as hurt back then as you were when I found you. She picked me up and took me back here. Took care of my bandages and gave me plenty of seeds to eat while I was on the mend. We got along really well. It was just how I’d imagine having a sibling is like.”

“And they knew what you were?”

Jimmy couldn’t help the little chuckle that escaped his beak. “Yeah. Yeah. They thought I was a normal bird at first, just like you. Didn’t take them long to realize that wasn’t the case after I started talking.” Another thing they had in common with Tango. “They were good flockmates once they figured it out, though.”

“I see…”

Was that an invitation to talk more? Or a dismissal? Jimmy couldn’t tell. He wasn’t sure what to say. He could talk about old memories of this house. Of the ranch. Of the people inside. Would it help? Would it only make things worse? Tango didn’t say anything else, either. He just kept looking at that farmhouse, away from Jimmy.

More silence. More of that infuriating quiet that made it feel like time had stopped around them. There wasn’t even a breeze. No whisper of grass or whistle of wind. Empty. Jimmy hated it. And after what felt like hours but couldn’t have been more than a minute, he decided he had enough of it.  

The little bird jumped off of the beam to glide down to Tango. At the last second, he pulled in his wings and dropped, clawed toes catching on Tango’s horn.

“Tango I-”

Jimmy cut himself off. The dragon’s eyes were glistening. Tears pooled at the corners of his eyes. Wet streams left streaks from his eyes down to his chin. As soon as he noticed Jimmy looking, he tucked his face beneath his claws. 

“Tango, are you alright?”

“I’m sorry.”

“What?”

“I’m so sorry Jimmy.” Bright little droplets began to fall from between his claws. 

“For what?” The phoenix leaned down closer, patting one wing against his friend’s head. He wasn’t sure if Tango could feel the brush of feathers through the scales, but he hoped that the pressure and motion could comfort him. “What on Earth do you have to be sorry for?”

“I messed up. I lost my temper. I ruined everything.”

“What are you on about? Of course you didn’t.”

“But I did. It’s because of me the ranch burnt down. Here you are telling me that this was your home, that you lived here and had family here and they were humans, and I- And I went messed it all.”

Jimmy couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Tango, you’re being silly. They were trying to kill you,” he said, exasperated. “And they were the ones who started the fires.”

“Exactly! They wouldn’t have been here if it wasn’t for me. They wouldn’t have shot you or ruined your home if it wasn’t for me. I led those people here, and then I killed them. Humans, just like your friends.”

This was ridiculous. Jimmy hopped off the horn. Tango moved his claws away automatically, making room for the little bird to avoid accidentally bumping or crushing him. With the space cleared, Jimmy perched instead on the end of the dragon’s nose so that he could look his friend in those big, teary eyes. “It’s fine, really. And it’s not your fault by a long shot. The ranch, the house, it’s been vacant for years. I haven’t been there for years. Neither have my old flockmates. They’re gone. This hasn’t been home to me for years. Not until I came back here with you. And it’s not because I lived here before. It’s because I’m here with you and these past few weeks have been a blast. And yeah, I’m sad it burned, but I’d rather those guys burn the place down than get you.”

Tango sniffed. The rush of air and smoke nearly knocked Jimmy from his perch. It certainly left his feathers in a mess. But he stood strong as his friend wiped at an eye. “Really?” he asked.

“Really.”

“But- but what about the humans?”

“What about them? Far as I’m concerned, they got what was coming to ‘em.”

Tango’s eyes widened. “But… but I thought… The way you’ve been avoiding talking about the fire, and we don’t ever mention the humans… I thought I really scared you.”

Well…

“I mean, I won’t lie, you’re temper took me by surprise. But you thought I was dead. And like I said, they were out to get you. I don’t hold it against you if that’s what you're thinking. I’m not scared of you.”

Tango seemed to melt beneath him. Massive wings that were once wound against his sides untensed and pooled across the ground. A massive sigh escaped his nose. It was less violent this time, though, sending the oddly comforting smell of bonfire smoke wafting over Jimmy. The guilty glisten in his eyes turned into a reassured glitter. “Oh thank goodness. I thought we were avoiding talking about all this time because I scared you. You would keep mentioning it and then dropping it right away. I felt so guilty all this time, you don’t understand.”

“What? No,” Jimmy huffed, settling his feathers back into place. “Is that really why you’ve been shutting down every time I bring up the fire or humans?”

“Uh… yeah…” he said sheepishly, trying to look away. It was a difficult task, considering Jimmy was right on his nose. 

“I thought it was because you didn’t want to think about it. Every time I mentioned it you got that look in your eye and I thought you were still angry at them or something. And then you were talking about leaving today-”

Tango cut him off. “I thought you’d want me out for ruining your place and losing my temper!”

“Of course NOT!” That was the farthest thing from what he wanted. “If anything, I’d hope you might stick around for a while after your wings were healed. It was finally starting to feel like-” Jimmy snapped his beak shut, realizing what he was just about to say. Was it too soon?

“What? What what what?!” Tango asked. He pushed his head forward, trying to lean in, but Jimmy was perched on his nose. The little bird just moved with him. He blinked, realizing his mistake before reaching out with his claws to scoop Jimmy up. “What were you going to say?”

He debated. He warred within himself, thinking so hard there was probably smoke coming out the sides of his head in a similar fashion to the smoke coming from Tango’s nose. If there was ever a time to say it, now was that time.

“It was starting to feel like we were flockmates.” 

[pinkiedev]

Payback Ch. 2

Previous: Ch. 1

Next: Ch. 3

The adventures of a tiny Steve Harrington being met with a now giant-looking Eddie Munson continue~

--------

Alright. Eddie… may not be taking this as well as he should be. Or not how he should, period, maybe?

Eddie had long since come to terms that he was not exactly the most stable or reasonable of persons at the best of times, and now, faced with an impossible situation that he was still about 82.3% sure was some sort of fucked up hallucination, he couldn’t say that he was anywhere close to being at his ‘best.’

Coupled with the fact that he failed math last year, well. 

He let out a bleat of only slightly hysterical laughter at the thought, jerking the wheel to turn the corner and into the trailer park he called home.

Yeah. Definitely not at his best.

His eyes briefly skittered away from the road and to his lunchbox that was secured in the passenger seat, belt strapped across it in some haphazard attempt at not letting it get flung all around the van like it usually was with Eddie’s impeccable driving skills. 

Sure, he might’ve made up the entire tiny person that looked exactly like the bane of three, maybe three and a half years of his high school existence, but if he was gonna validate their existence by stuffing them in a weed-filled metal box, he might as well make sure they didn’t get tossed around like a damn salad.

So here he was, pulling up into his driveway and eyeing his lunchbox with more suspicion than any cop in town ever had.

“Here goes,” he muttered to himself, warily reaching out and hastily jabbing the button to undo the box’s seatbelt - as if he expected something to jump out at him. 

Yeah. Nothing did. Pretty anticlimactic and all that, sure, but Eddie let himself breathe out a little sigh of relief, double checking the clasps of his lunchbox were secured before lifting the thing up as steadily as he could and kicking his van door open to hop out.

Doll-Steve hadn’t made a peep since he’d seen Eddie, frozen nearly the whole time except when Eddie tried to put him in the lunchbox, a strangled sound coming out of the smaller as he’d attempted to resist in the moment before he was dropped down on a rather substantially sized bag of the good green.

Eddie shook his head, clearing away the recollection as he dug into his pocket for his keys, fishing them out and unlocking the door to his and Wayne’s trailer in a practiced movement. His uncle wasn’t home - wouldn’t be for a couple days, at least, since work had taken him out of town - so Eddie wouldn’t have to worry about someone spotting him acting like a complete schitzo once he was inside.

“Home sweet home,” Eddie sang, giving a wince disguised as a smile. What the hell was he gonna do now?

-

It reeked in here. 

Weed smelled like skunk on a good day, and, as Steve had very, very clearly prefaced, today was not a good day. Today was, in fact, wrapping up to be a pretty goddamned bad day, if Steve did say so himself, especially considering he was trapped in a metal box full of marijuana after being put there by none other than Eddie ‘the Freak’ Munson. 

Oh, Steve didn’t have anything particularly against Munson, despite the name; he’d like to say he’s a changed man from his high school days. Even then, he might’ve knocked shoulders or verbally shot down some people a few pegs, but he’d never really been one to really get into the whole nasty of the bullying shtick. Not that that meant all that much when he’d stood by and let it happen on more than just the occasional occurrence, but… well. At least he was mostly just guilty by association. 

All of this to say, he’d never particularly targeted Munson. The guy’d just been that one overly out-there misfit with his Dorks and Dweebs club. That was it. Yes, yes, Dustin, Steve knew that wasn’t what it was called, but it’d be a cold day in hell before Steve truly let the last dregs of his high school personality fall far enough down that he’d actually say the nerd game right.

Besides that, all he really knew about Munson was that he was pretty much the local drug dealer, not that Steve’d ever bought anything directly himself. There were more than a few rumors about Munson because of that on top of his Hell-something club, which led to him being less targeted than most of the misfits. 

But that was besides the point.

The point was, Steve didn’t have any strong feelings towards Munson, but that didn’t mean the same could be said back to him. And that was without the baseline reaction the guy might have at catching someone who was probably the size of their palm.

Steve swallowed heavily.

Yeah. He hoped this situation would turn out for the better, but that hope was pretty much smoke from a candle already.

Steve flinched as metal reverberated against metal, the clasps keeping his current prison flicking up, and he had barely a second to shove himself into a cold corner before searing light was filtering in from the newly opened lid.

--------

;3333 hehehehehehe and so it continues~~~

Highkey poor Steve tho XD

Next: Ch. 3

[jaesqueso]

Love me again

pairing: ex-boyfriend!lucas x female!reader

summary: when you encounter your ex-boyfriend after four years after your break up and he asks for another chance

for the Red collab by @jeonronwoo​

word count: 3,401

warnings: strong language, mentions of alcohol, domestic violence and mental illnesses, exes to lovers!au

a/n: I don’t how people are still feeling about Lucas but I already had this on the plans so I wanted to finish it and what a better time to post than when he makes a comeback to social media? hope SM gives us closure on the whole situation but in the mean time enjoy this poorly written story 😅 hope ya’ll enjoy it! ❤

☽ ・・・・・ ☾

“Thank you very much, you can wait at the end of the counter.” You smile at the costumer as you finish writing his name on the cup for his drink.

Getting ready on the system, you go ahead and great the next client.

“Welcome to ‘The Vision’, what can I get you today?”

“A venti iced coffee.” You stop recognising a voice you thought you’d never hear again. “And another chance?”

“L-Lucas?” Finally looking up, you freeze at a face you thought you’d never see again.

-

You met him in highschool. Typical bad boy, often spotted skipping class to go smoke behind the gym, his rudeness to colleagues and teachers constantly getting him detention but somehow managed to have good enough grades to get him through. Needless to say his popularity was not that great and he was definitely someone you wouldn’t like to be associated with. That was until you got pared with him for a school project.

You were the typical good girl. Not the best of your class but your grades were good. Never skipped or got detention, but you were classified as borderline nerdy so your popularity wasn’t through the roof. Honestly you didn’t care, you were just focused on finishing highschool and getting the hell out of this boring town. But for that you needed to keep your good grades and that was being threatened by getting pared with him.

At first you thought maybe you could do the whole project alone, that way you’d ensure you got a good grade and wouldn’t have to deal with him, but your conscience convinced you to give him a chance. That was error number one.

Almost an hour late, but Lucas eventually showed up at the library. It took some time to get him to do something but right before the deadline you two managed to get the project finished and delivered on time and you were actually surprised the under his careless atitude he actually did a good job that resulted in one of the best works on your class. After that you thought you could finally breathe and not have to hang out with him anymore but he had different plans. He sat next to you in class, even if it wasn’t in his typical seat in the back of the classroom, and you two started casually talking. As you got to know him better you realised that under that bad boy mask there was actually a nice guy so you let him in your life. That was error number two.

With time you grew closer and closer. The way he looked at you, talked with you, was different than with other people and you started feeling things. It all happened so naturally that when he leaned forward you gladly welcomed his lips on yours. That was error number three.

As the relationship grew, he opened up to you. You sat silently as he told you how his dad had problems with alcohol and used to hit his mom almost everyday, right in front of him, until he fled the scene. At the time Lucas was relieved but his mom just went into dark road into depression leaving him, an only child, to figure things out on his own. At that moment you understood the rebellion inside of him, it was not his fault. Foolishly in love you decided to help him, a typical case of ‘I can change him’ syndrome. That was error number four.

It took a while but you convinced him to let you help him study, so he can improve his grades and apply to college. It was hard work but your mission was successful and you even changed your plans to go to uni closer to him. That was error number five.

Moving into an apartment together, your relationship was better than ever and you couldn’t be happier. Lucas barely had any money so the house expenses pretty much fell over your parents pockets. Obviously they were not very happy with that but you defended him at all costs telling them how much he has changed. That was error number six.

A few months in something started to feel off. And then you found out he was failing most of his classes. You confronted him about it and, even though he seemed sorry about it, he told you he was quitting college. You argued about all the hard work you two had done to get him there but in the end you couldn’t force him to keep going. The following month he just either stayed in the house all day or just went out and spent money. Your parents money. Once they knew about this, they threatened to cut you off so you had a serious talk with Lucas that agreed to find himself a job and get some income. You trusted him and that was error number seven.

As you busted your ass with school and even getting a part-time job at a local cafe, you trusted he was doing what he promised, but it was a mess. He found a job at a bar but was fired about a week after, you don’t really understand why. He told you he was looking again but soon he started to come home drunk. The first time you pretended not to notice, after the second time you started to make up reasons in your head to excuse his behaviour, but then it started to get more frequent and it was starting to get on your nerves. A few weeks later, you were at home trying to relax after a dreadful day and there he came crumbling. But this time you had enough.

“Lucas?” You called out from the living room.

“Who else would it fucking be?” He mumbled, struggling to take off his jacket.

“Great…” Rolling your eyes, you leaned back on the couch.

“What now?” Finally he was able to take the jacket off and roughly throw it on the ground.

“It’s just great to see my boyfriend drunk in the middle of the day again.” You shook your head in disbelief of the words coming out of your mouth.

“Mind your fucking business.” His body tumbled to the other end of the couch.

“Well I am, when you’re out there spending my money on booze!” You got up, massaging your temples as you looked away from him.

“Oh, shut the fuck up.” He groaned, like he was doing nothing wrong.

“No, you shut the fuck up, Lucas! I’m tired of the same thing every day!” You turned back around almost screaming in rage.

“Whatever…” He huffed.

“Not whatever!” You finally let go.“I’m tired of busting my ass in school and work for you to just go ahead and have fun at my expense! You said you’re different but you’re just like your father-”

“What the fuck did you just say?” He suddenly got up preventing you for saying anything further.

“I-I’m sorry,” you quickly apologised as you shouldn’t have brought that up, “I didn’t mean to say that-”

“But you said it!” He rushed to you pushing you against the wall.”I’m not like that fucking coward you hear me?”

Your eyes widened as you noticed his hand pushed all the way back, tight in a fist and about to come down on you, before he stopped.

“Shit…” His flaming eyes came back to reality when he noticed what he was about to do.

“Were you going to hit me?” Your voice sounded stern but your whole body was shaking on the inside.

“Babe, I’m sorry-” Dropping his hands on his side, he gulped.

“Go ahead then. Hit me. Show me how different you are from your father by doing exactly what he did to your mom.” You challenged him.

“I…” He started to back away as he looked at his hands.

“I’m done Lucas.” You sighed. ”I tried to help you, but I can’t. I’m not strong enough for this. You need professional help.”

You went into your shared bedroom and grabbed a bag you had prepared because deep down you knew this day would come.

“I’m going to spend the night at Ahreum’s and when I come back I don’t want to see you or any of your shit here. It’s over.”

Lucas stood in the middle of the room, speechless as he watched you leave.

That was the last time you saw him. Until today.

The next day you came back and he was gone. Part of you felt sad he didn’t even try to fight for you, for what you two had built together. But another part of you was just knew that’s exactly what would happen and you felt relieved and free of the drama that came with Lucas.

-

“Hi.” His smile is soft and full of hope but leaves a mess inside your head.

“Kun, can you cover for me? I’m gonna take my break now.” You suddenly abandon your place behind the counter.

“S-sure.” Confused, your friend moves to the register as you disappear into the back. “You said venti iced coffee?”

“I’ll be right back.” Lucas flees out the front door leaving the other even more confused.

You open the backdoor that leads to an alley next to the coffee place you work in, panting as your heart is beating so fast you swear it will burst at anytime. You squat down, body shaking as a million thoughts go through your head. What is he doing here after all this time? How can he just walk up to you so casually after the way things went down? What does he expect to get out of this?

“Y/N…” You look up and there he is again, standing right in front of you.

Quickly you get back up and move towards the door to get back in, but he stops you.

“Wait! I just wanna talk!” He pleas and that makes your blood boil.

“What could you possibly have to say after all this time, Lucas?” The name that once gave you butterflies, rolls out of your tongue like razors cutting their way out. “You know what, I don’t even care, I don’t want to talk to you!”

“I know I have no right to do this but please just hear me out. You don’t have to say anything, just give me 2 minutes, please…” You can hear the desperation on his voice, even though he doesn’t raise his voice.

“Time’s counting.” Sighing you decide to let him speak.

“Ok ok, hm… I swear I had a speech prepared but it all vanished from my head now.” He scratches the back of his but then you give him a look that he knows he’d better not waste his time. “I know I screwed up. We had something great and I ruined it. You were so good to me and I just took you for granted so I ended up losing you.”

Taking a deep breath, you fight the tears that threaten to fall. He takes a step forward before continuing.

“Look, the day you sent me away finally opened my eyes. You’re the best thing that happened to me and I gave it all up. And for what? Nothing. So I left and I decided be a better person. For you. For us. I spent 2 years in a rehab center taking care of myself and 2 more getting myself together. I got a job, a small apartment and it really feels like I’m in the right path. I’m just missing one thing. You. Let me show I’ve changed. Please.”

“What makes you think there’s space in my life for you anymore?” You don’t know how you managed to get those words out of your mouth without cracking.

“I don’t know. I just…” He sighs. “I don’t want to believe our story is over. Just give me one more chance. If at any moment I even say the wrong thing just say it and I’ll disappear. For good this time. Please.”

“You don’t get to break my heart anymore, Lucas.” You gulp, trying to keep yourself together. “I promised myself I’d never let that happen again.”

“I won’t.” He looks straight into your eyes making you want to believe him so bad. “I promised myself I wouldn’t do that again.”

“I can’t believe I’m doing this…” You mumble to yourself.

“What?”

“You have a week.” Turning around you reach for the door.

“Really?” Good thing you can’t see how his eyes sparkle with hope.

“Don’t make me regret this.” You turn around and glare at him. “I mean it.”

“I won’t, I promise!” You hear him cheer outside as you get back to work, pulling a silly giggle out of you.

All you did for the past 4 years was trying to forget him. And you thought you did, until he showed up in front of you and brought all those feelings back. Maybe a few years are not enough to get over the one you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with and that makes you look forward to giving him another chance. But unfortunately you can’t just erase the bad times from your memory. You sent him away for a reason. He says he’s changed but you have your motives for doubting it.

The next day he takes you for a walk by the river. It starts off with awkward silence, none of you knowing how to talk to each other anymore. But as you take a seat in a bench facing the water you start to catch up. The way he talks is different but in a good way, like he’s not trying to put that bad boy facade anymore, he’s just the sweet guy you once knew. It really seems like he’s getting his life back together and you could almost see yourself fit in it.

The next date is a dinner downtown. Not a fancy restaurant, but he knows you’re not a fan of those anyways, just a cozy little place with great food. As you ordered you decided to test him and order yourself some wine. He didn’t seem affected by it, happily drinking his sparkling water as you eat and talk. Perhaps your tricky move triggered some instant karma because the wine glasses keep coming and in no time you’re seeing double. Lucas, takes you home, trying hard to follow your blurred instructions. He gets you inside, but just like a movie scene you trip and fall on your bed, pulling him on top of you. Your faces are inches apart and you can’t even think straight, but all you want is to feel those lips back on yours. However when you get closer he pulls away. The next moments fade from your memory as you pass out and when you wake up there’s a cute little note with water and a pill, just what you need for the pounding in your head.

Later that day he knocks on your door. Embarrassment takes over you but he doesn’t for one minute mention the previous night. He brings food, thinking you might not be in the mood to cook, and then he heads to the door but you ask him to stay. You two eat and then watch a movie, sneaking glances at each other not really caring about the plot.

The following date is a quick coffee at ‘The Vision’ as you have to work two shifts. You talk about college and how it’s been hard for you to get a job in your field after graduating, leading you to work here to pay the bills. Your heart skips a beat when he takes your hand over the table and tells you how he truly believes you’ll be able to achieve all your hopes and dreams. It seems like such a cliché thing to say but coming from him just hits differently. Luckily it’s time to get back to work because you don’t know how to deal with the desperate will to give it all up and get back with him.

With almost a week of dates with Lucas, you hate how easily you were brought right back into his spell. But at the same time it just felt so right. He really seems to have changed. During these days there were numerous occasions that, a few years ago, would’ve made him flip off just because. But now he seems more collected. Maybe things could really work out this time. Just maybe.

And there comes the end of the week. He picks you up late at night after your shift and takes you to a viewpoint facing the whole city. A beautiful scenario that looked quite familiar. Lucas pulls out some snacks and sodas before you sit and watch the lights below you.

“Cheeto sticks and Mango Monster?” You chuckle checking what he brought.

“It was a long shot but I hope you still like those.” He smiles.

“I can’t believe you remembered…” Shaking your head with a grin, you take a sip from your drink.

“How could I forget? Us driving around the empty streets late at night and ending up in places like this, talking about the future…” His voice trails off recalling all the broken promises made on those nights.

“Little did we know how things would turn out.” You sigh.

“There’s still time to turn things around.” Turning his gaze to you, Lucas examines your face trying to read it. “We can bring back those nights. And all the other moments we shared.”

“Even the ones you were out spending my money on booze and I had to carry you to bed because you were so wasted?” You scoff, closing your eyes.

“That’s not gonna happen again.” He promises.

“But how do I know, Lucas?” You finally turn to him. “You’ve made promises but that you didn’t keep! You said you’d get a job and instead you went out and got drunk everyday. You said you’d never hurt me but somehow I was still left heartbroken. You said you’d be by my side and then you left.”

“You were the one who told me to go!” He tries to fight back. “I didn’t want to but I knew it was the best for us! I needed to get better to keep all those promises. I don’t think you understand how hard it was for me to be away from you all this time.”

“If it was that hard to be apart what took you so long to reach out?” You get up and take some steps forward. “Didn’t you get out of rehab two years ago?”

“Because I needed to make sure I was good enough to come back!” Getting up too, he stands right behind you. “I needed to make sure I wouldn’t make the same mistakes again. I wanted to get a job and make sure I was done drowning my sorrow with alcohol. I’ve been doing therapy, going deep into my problems, and it has really been helping me. But something’s missing. You’re missing.”

With the ends of your sweater, you wipe the tears off your cheeks, thinking about how hard it was for you too and how you kept waiting for him to reach out, even if you wouldn’t admit it.

“And I was scared.” He takes a deep breath. “What if I came back and you had moved on with someone else? Someone who treats you better. Someone who gives you all their time and support. Someone who loves you like I do. And worst, someone who you’d love more than you ever did me.”

Slowly you turn around and watch the moonlight shine on his wet cheeks, shoulders shaking and chest heaving.

“I know I have no right barging back into your life like this, but I had to try, one last time.” He shrugs, smiling through the tears. “I know I hurt you but I just wanted you to love me again.”

“How could I love you again, if I never stopped?” You catch a glimpse of his eyes widening as you run into his arms, connecting your lips after what seemed like an eternity.

You’ve made a lot of errors when it comes to Lucas, but for the first time if feels like you’re doing the right thing.

☽ ・・・・・ ☾

a/n 2: not gonna tag anyone on this one as I don’t know how you feel about Lucas and also no networks, but I promise more works are coming!

[irl-northstar]

The Strange Case of Valentine Vuong

It went without saying that Valentine wasn’t normal. Wade already knew that. It was what he liked so much about them! That and the needles for fingers. And their hair. And the way they stole his gun that one time. Okay, so there were a lot of things to like about Valentine. But the important one for this fic is that Valentine wasn’t normal.

After his debrief with the Atelier, he'd immediately gone home and wasted a huge chunk of his 48-hours stalking (researching!) Valentine. Which wasn’t that weird. To be fair, a huge part of Wade’s job was stalking (researching) people, and they’d literally handed him a file full of weirdly personal information about Doc Ock, so they probably wouldn’t even be mad if they found out.

Anyways, all that to say that Wade used all of his scummy, mercenary secrets to find out everything he could about his future spouse. It usually took him about 2 hours to gather all the relevant information he needed about his targets. He spent 16 hours gathering information on Valentine. Which all amounted to fuck-all because he found nothing. 

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. He’d found out quite a lot about a person named ‘Valentine Vuong.’ The issue is he found too much information. One source said Valentine had graduated from their local community college with an associate’s degree. Another said they hadn’t even finished high school. Another said Valentine had been born on Krakoa (despite Valentine being older than the modern nation of Krakoa by at least two decades). A different source said they’d never even been there (and by ‘source,’ Wade meant that he bothered Sage until she told him what she knew about Valentine). One of his most trusted sources (i.e., Weasel) had done some digging to try and figure out some basic information: Valentine’s age, height, interests, allergies, favorite member of the Golden Girls, and star sign. Y’know, all the essential stuff you’d need to know before entering a committed relationship with someone. Bafflingly, Weasel, the most effective slimeball Wade knew, hadn’t even been able to confirm that Valentine existed at all. 

All of that to say, Wade was now more attracted to them than ever before.

He’d always liked a challenge, and Valentine was nothing but. And sure, there was an 86.2% chance that they were gonna double-cross him and feed him to the proverbial wolves. But frankly, those were better odds than Wade usually got with his canon love interests. Man, the writers really hated seeing him happy, didn’t they? Hopefully Alyssa was different. Sigh. Besides, the editors had finally given him the green light for a non-female love interest, and he was not going to blow it.

As turned on as Wade was by his crush/possible addition to his rogue’s gallery, he figured he should sort this out before anything actually happened between him and Valentine.

Unfortunately, he then got kidnapped by the Harrower (or just ‘Harrower’?), and if you’re reading this, you know the rest. Anyways, by the time Val invited him on a zoo date, he was too over the moon to really give a fuck about whether or not they were secretly plotting against him. He was too busy trying not to act like an overexcited schoolgirl because Val called him ‘cute.’ And, honestly, he didn’t think someone who was just with him for information or whatever could stomach flirting with him or, G-d forbid, kissing him. But Valentine had seemed not just amicable but enthusiastic at the idea. So maybe they actually just liked him. That idea was almost scarier than them just being with him to act as a honey pot.

And then they’d poisoned (or threatened to poison, same diff) Yuriko for him, picked a fight with Marvel’s most hentai-y villain, and planted one on him right then and there! In front of other people, no less! And well, if that wasn’t enough to soak his panties, he didn’t know what was.

By the time they made it back to Wade’s apartment at the end of Issue #5, Wade figured the whole thing could wait. After all, what was he expecting? Did he really think dating a member of the Atelier would be normal? Did he think Val was gonna be completely transparent with him after knowing each other for less than a week? No, he wasn’t going to ruin things by opening his big stupid mouth.

Maybe if he’d known about the letter Valentine had sent to Doc Ock, he’d feel differently, but the writers only felt like letting him break the 4th wall when it was plot-convenient, so he didn’t know about the letter yet.

Either way, Valentine was leaning against his chest, his giant symbiote dog taking up ¼ of the living room, and he was happy. So he’d just let it go for now. He had a whole ‘nother month until the next issue came out, anyways.

/////

Originally posted on ao3 @ goth-iterations

:)

[theghostofashton]

wip wednesday

His new roommate doesn’t seem to like him very much.

It’s only been a few weeks since move-in day, but the one-word answers and lasting stares that TK can only classify as ‘judgmental’ have told him all he needs to know. The guy’s definitely a little uptight, super rigid about when he leaves for class and what time he wants the lights to be turned out each night. TK asked him to leave them on an extra few minutes the other day, and he swore he heard the beginnings of an exasperated sigh.

Okay, so maybe he procrastinated reading for class until after midnight, and maybe Carlos has an early class the next day, but he thought he was done being criticized for his poor decisions the day he moved out of his parents’ houses. If someone had told him he was signing up to get judged by his damn roommate, of all people, TK would’ve requested a single.

It doesn’t help that the guy is gorgeous, either. Messy tousled curls and these deep brown eyes that make something in TK melt every time Carlos looks at him. The moments where he has every intention of standing his ground, insisting that it’s his room too and he should get a say in when the lights go off every night, and all Carlos does is lay eyes on him and suddenly TK is fumbling over the words and not saying much of anything at all.

And it’s not like Carlos has ever said anything shitty or gone out of his way to be an asshole. TK’s definitely woken him up at 3am, barging into their room with zero consideration for the fact that he has a roommate, a sleeping roommate at that. There was one night he fell asleep without even taking his shoes off, and when he woke up the next morning, they’d been removed from his feet and placed neatly beside his bed. There was even a bottle of water and a couple Advil on his bedside table. Although that’s probably less Carlos actually caring about him and more Carlos making sure his roommate doesn’t like, die, less than a month into them moving in. That’d probably suck to deal with.

He didn’t have actual expectations for his roommate, and he definitely wasn’t buying in to all the myths about becoming best friends with him and taking on the next four years together, but Carlos is really not what TK imagined.

Over the past couple weeks, TK’s made friends with the people on their floor – including Grace Ryder, who is surprisingly chill for an RA – joined the Queer Union and a couple other clubs, and been invited to multiple frat parties. He’s almost never in their room on Friday and Saturday nights, and he usually spends his Sundays in bed trying to muscle through the hangovers. He’s invited Carlos out with him a couple times, but always been turned down. At first, he figured maybe the guy just isn’t the frat party type. Marjan from down the hall is like that, but she’s also in the Queer Union with him and she was talking about some event at the Muslim Student Association a couple days ago.

Carlos hasn’t talked about any clubs, even some of the book-ish ones, which is weird, because he’s always reading. His desk is piled high with stacks of paperbacks and he always seems to have his head buried in one whenever TK returns to their room. It was no surprise to learn he’s an English major, so TK can’t figure out why he wouldn’t want to get together with some of the other ones at NYU and talk about that.  

They’re just different people, is what TK’s landed on. Carlos is just the guy he has to share this shoebox with for the next nine months, and as long as he doesn’t voice any of his obvious issues with TK, they should be just fine.

[runninguplenorahills]

I browsed through some mister mustard accounts on instagram and I thought I’d post some of their posts and comment on them, so here we go:

[I cropped the pictures and put the captions on them so it’s easier to read]

You mean “gorgeous El looking at her boyfriend indifferently with the slightest touch of confusion and irritation😐”

They really are romanticizing this scene way too much! Putting an arm around someone’s shoulder is not an inherently romantic gesture and these definitely aren’t “soft love sick smiles”. Mike is focused on pretending to be someone else and El is disappointed at the “from, mike” note but ultimately trying to pretend that everything is okay. These are the fakest smiles ever!!

Of course it would’ve been great to see more moments of El and Mike getting along this season, but then again it would be even nicer to have them getting along while they’re being themselves. And Michael in that outfit is just a shitty knock off! This outfit is purposefully supposed to make the audience feel weird because it is literally out of place! Mike doesn’t usually wear things like that so that’s not him being a dork, that’s him being fake. So it’s strange that this person sees comfort in his outfit. Also, they’re literally having an argument…..and this person still thinks that El rummaged around in Mike’s suitcase to steal a shirt from him?? She’s literally giving him the silent treatment!!! And while El and Mike love each other dearly platonically, Mike isn’t exactly El’s safe place. And even less when they’re arguing so I don’t think that El would feel comfortable wearing his clothes while being upset with him! His clothes do not make her feel safe atm so she wouldn’t wear them. Her shirt is still pretty cool though.

Mike is not in awe just like how El wasn’t in awe in the other screenshot. He’s wearing his shitty knock off surfer shirt meaning he’s putting up a fake facade. He’s not at all being authentic here so even if he was in awe, it wouldn’t mean anything because it wouldn’t have been genuine. Mike is also wearing sunglasses which hide his eyes and a big portion of his face to make it harder to read facial expressions and so I can say with certainty that you couldn’t even tell if he looked in love!!

Mike only said “I knew you liked yellow” but it was never mentioned anywhere that that’s her favorite color. I like yellow too but my favorite color is red so El very possibly might have a different color that actually is her favorite as well! I think that El’s actual favorite color is a color that is stereotypically more associated with femininity because we see that El likes to lean towards femininity more due to the fact that she was stripped of it when she was in the lab. She admires Nancy a lot in s1 and in s3 we see how El chooses more feminine clothes when she explores who she is with Max. Therefore I personally think her favorite colors are:

And also, Mike’s color isn’t blue for nothing! I personally think Mike looks best in blue [especially dark blue], black and white. I also really liked his red shirt in s1 so it would be cool to maybe see Mike wear something red again.

Purple = true but not inherently romantic

Blue = true but not in the way this person thinks it is

Orange = not exactly true

Of course Mike would do anything to protect El but that isn’t exactly something that sets them apart from just being friends. Yes, their bond is special but it’s not romantic!!! They would die for each other but then again, Mike literally jumped off the quarry for Dustin, and Mike and Dustin aren’t in love so it yet again doesn’t really mean that milkshake has an extraordinarily special romantic bond because Mike is known for being willing to die for all of his friends [this is not healthy though, like Mike definitely has mental health problems] . “He saved her […] and he gave her food and a home” this is not a sign that he is in love with El!!!! Hopper did the exact same for her! So it more so hints at a familial bond between Mike and El. “They really do love each other so much” platonically with a capital P :)))

“It’s not a normal relationship” -> yeah, because normally you’d be in love with each other!!

“Mike always makes sure she’s happy and safe as much as he can” uhm… I wouldn’t say that he always makes sure of that. He never hurts her deliberately and of course he likes it better when she’s happy but he doesn’t actively choose to assure her happiness! He does actively do that with Will though!! Of course Mike ends up hurting Will sometimes but he always actively makes sure that Will is okay afterwards! “He’s always gentle with her and understanding” I wouldn’t really describe Mike as being gentle with El and rink-o-mania really flew above this person’s head but oh well, I guess this is yet again a statement that applies way better to byler! “They are each other’s comforts, and safe places […]” That is really clearly shown to be not true at all!!! Mike and El never comfort each other and also never seek comfort in one another! For El I would say her safe place is Hopper [her family in general] and for Mike it is literally shoved right into our faces that Will is his safe place! Look at all their heart-to-hearts!! Mike feels comfortable enough to open up to Will and he feels safe to be himself around him too. Mike also always looks at Will for comfort and reassurance etc. so he actively seeks comfort in Will. Mike is Will’s safe place too if that wasn’t clear already <3

Bro……..what is fucking wrong with milkyways?!?!?!? It’s honestly so pathetic that they truly believe that marriage is the pinnacle of love!! Like, milkvans only want Mike and El to get married so badly because they literally think that if they don’t get married, they don’t actually love each other!!! Which is actually so funny because Mike canonically can’t bring himself to tell El that he loves her and mildews still think they’re in love lmao.

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

Izumi Kamukura [Beginning of Arc]

So...what’s the situation?

*Taka and Mondo arrive at the Future Foundation branch chief meeting room. 

Believe me, I wouldn’t call you if it wasn’t important.

Thing is, I don’t see how it could be.

Seriously Chihiro Fujisaki, we have bigger things to worry about than the boy.

You haven’t heard what it is I have to say Munakata. You’ll want to hear this.

The boy?

You must be referring to Uchui Porosen. Correct?

Yes...I’m sorry, I know in truth, Munakata is right, and that I shouldn’t be focusing time on him...

But...it’s not like we’ve been given much opportunity to strike back against Zetsubou. I would rather waste my time doing something productive.

The way I see it, helping someone is never a waste of time.

However, I looked into Uchui’s history, and...I discovered some things that might be of interest. 

If I could, I’d tell the whole Foundation this, but since there’s so few of us still lingering around...well, I don’t think I need to explain myself.

This is because of the outburst he had, right? Did you manage to find a reason for that?

You could say that.

Quit beating around the bush Miaya! What’s so important about it!?

Based on what I found, Uchui is a timid, easily swayed and often times kind individual, but...I always figured there was something dark inside him.

And...when I was able to take a close look at his family history...I realized where my gear feeling was coming from.

“Gear feeling?”

Well, I don’t exactly have guts, do I?

From the way it sounds, they weren’t particularly nice people. Uchui’s family, I mean.

No. They weren’t

*Miaya puts some papers and photos out on the desk.

I had to do a lot of investigative work over the last few weeks to get my hands on all of this. Without Kyoko or Shuichi around, it proved to be difficult. However, I was even able to get into contact with some of the victims...

Good God...!

*Taichi picks up and investigates the photos. They show very graphic experimental equipment, and horrific imagery of surgery and other mad science experiments.

This doesn’t make any sense. Doesn’t Uchui study theory-whatever? That doesn’t require to pick people apart!

Indeed. Are you sure these crimes are associated with that young man?

Uchui comes from a long line of researchers and scientists, all with their own unique field of expertise. Theoretical Physics is his own one.

But over the course of their experiments, this family is responsible for many scientific crimes. Obstruction of justice, torture, unlicensed surgery, child experimentation, kidnapping, manslaughter...I’ll let your mind come up with the rest.

I can’t believe this.

*Taka grabs the papers and crunches them up as he grips onto them tightly.

But Uchui is such a gentle soul. How could be have come from a group of heretics like this!?

Maybe that’s why he’s so fucked up. Maybe they did something to him...Or they did something that he couldn’t handle.

It still makes no sense. The Porosen’s are small business owners who are known to follow every regulation. They even came to the Future Foundation back in the day to check.

You know them Munakata?

Admittedly, not very well. But Juzo and Chisa were usually the ones who ran the safety procedures and checked the regulations.

But if that was the early days of the Future Foundation, Chisa Yukizome would already have become infected by despair by that time.

True, but Juzo wasn’t. And despite his problems, he was serious about combating despair and helping society on it’s way back up. He wouldn’t have slacked on his report.

That, and also science wasn’t the field the Porosen group delved in. They were more political and financial. I just can’t see them pulling something like this off under the Foundation’s nose.

Now, now. I never said that the Porosen’s were the one’s responsible for these crimes.

What? But you said that they did all this!

No...She said Uchui’s family. Not necessarily the Porosen’s...

Is he...Not actually one of the Porosen’s?

He is, and he isn’t...his Uncle married into the family and the rest took on the family name...But...

He was born...Kamukura...

He WHAT!?

*Munakata lurches to his feet.

Kamukura...!? You mean to say he is related to the Academy Founder!?

And all these crimes were committed by Izuru’s descendants!?

I...didn’t even know the founders descendants were still alive!?

I didn’t even know Izuru HAD kids!

It’s true. While I don’t know the exact generation Uchui is, Izuru Kamukura is his great great grandfather.

Izuru’s family had to go into hiding during the tragedy, but from what I uncovered, it didn’t work out.

Only two members of the Kamukura bloodline were left alive after the Tragedy died down. Uchui, obviously, and his Uncle, Ryuichi.

However, a few years ago, Ryuichi was arrested on a defamation and embezzlement charge. The rest of his crimes were uncovered and documented shortly afterwards, which is how I was even able to find this out. However, something mysterious happened after his arrest. He was set to be transferred to an insane asylum, but when they entered the back of the vehicle he had been contained in...

Let me guess...the bastard escaped...

No Mondo...he had been murdered.

Huh!?

Right under the escorts noses? How!?

I don’t quite know, but they confirmed it had to have been a murder. The cause of death was a gunshot to the trachea, and there was nothing Ryuichi could have used to commit suicide.

My personal theory is that someone disguised themselves as an escort and did the deed with a silenced weapon, but that’s another thing entirely.

...So...on top of all these horrible experimentations, this is the same family legacy that founded the hellhole that was the old Hope’s Peak.

Now that I’m hearing it, I’m not even surprised anymore...

Yeah...My family have done some very immature things, but nothing on this level...If they had, I’d be plagued by nightmare and trauma too...

Miaya...I’m almost scared to ask, but...Did Uchui’s uncle ever do anything to him?

More than likely, yes. However...I don’t think that alone is the reason for Uchui’s trauma...

I was able to trace it down to one single event...And it’s related to a completely different member of the Kamukura bloodline.

And who would that be?

Izumi Kamukura...Uchui’s father.

What did HE do...?

...

*Miaya doesn’t answer. Instead, she just slides a paper across the table.

I’m sure you’ll recognize this.

!!??

*Munakata immediately recognizes the document Miaya hands over to them, and he snatches it.

Hey! 

What is it!?

It’s...It couldn’t be...!

I was surprised myself...but I checked my sources more than several times. It’s unfortunately true.

What is it!? Spill dude!

It’s...

The Hope Cultivation Plan...! The Kamukura Project...!

!!!??

!!!??

!!!??

!!!??

That’s...wait, isn’t that-!?

The project that turned Hajime into Izuru? The one that gave him his limitless Ultimate Talents? The very same!

So you’re telling me that Uchui’s old man had a hand in that project!?

I mean...he was a scientists with human experimentation on his record...

I’m afraid it’s worse than that...Izumi wasn’t merely a participant of the project...

He’s the one...who invented it.

Huh!?

Invented it!?

This document does indeed have his signature...

Miaya, where did you get this!?

I found it hidden away in an old archive of information salvaged from Hope’s Peak. I had to employ the Warriors of Hope’s help in order to track it down.

I wasn’t looking for it initially but...I suddenly got a gear feeling...Based on what I uncovered, Izumi was obsessed with his grandfather’s research into talent and human capabilities. His research notes indicated he wished to explore upon Izuru’s research, and create a perfect being.

As we know, he got that wish...He approached the steering committee of the school his grandfather had founded and...we know the rest of the story...

And the entire world crumbled as a result of that wish, and Junko Enoshima’s interference.

It’s unfair to say this, since I know full well if this way didn’t work, Junko Enoshima would have found an entirely new way to destroy the whole world...

But suffice to say, had this man and his fellow scientists not approached the steering committee with the idea, we might not be rescuing the world from the effects of the Tragedy, and Izuru Kamukura...a-as in the second Izuru Kamukura...wouldn’t have been born.

When we found this document, I discovered that it confirmed a few theories that I had had previously about the Kamukura Project, that we didn’t know for certain before.

I assume you’re referring to this one you highlighted.

*Munakata points to the book, which he puts on the table.

“The Hope’s Peak Headmaster brought forth the latest test subject, and I have a good feeling about this one. He’s a reserve course student named Hajime Hinata. Hopefully, all the previous experiments up until now would have been worth it.”

I...I did indeed hear that a few Reserve Course students lost their lives as a result of failed experimentation...Clearly, Hajime Hinata was not the first test subject, though he was the first successful one.

Miaya, I don’t like what you’re implying...! You’re not suggesting that Izumi...used his own son as a test subject, are you!?

The fuck...!?

I don’t know for certain. However, I honestly find it unlikely.

Oh...really? You don’t?

Izumi and Izuru both put great importance on the idea of High Schoolers being the ripe and easiest age to scout talent. After all, a High School student is young enough to still learn and develop, but old and mature enough to understand the importance of their abilities.

Uchui is 20 years of age right now. At the time the Kamukura Project happened, he would have only been 7.

And he wasn’t exactly a gifted child like Nagisa Shingetsu. He wouldn’t have been a good candidate.

However, I do still think Izumi may have used Uchui for other such tests involved with the project. A test for anesthesia, and a blood doner for instance.

This is sickening...No wonder he’s so broken...

Uchui...Why did you never tell anyone?

How could he? His family might just be the most evil criminals of our modern time. Izumi and Ryuichi are putting even Junko’s evil to the test.

I wouldn’t call it “evil.” It’s more of a misplaced ambition and unrelenting desire for knowledge and wisdom.

That same desire is what led Izuru to found Hope’s Peak academy. It makes sense his descendants would follow in his misguided example.

In a way, the Kamukura’s fit your definition of “geniuses” huh Taka?

I suppose they do.

Taka is right though. That kind of thing can corrupt even the most comforting of men. I won’t make assumptions, but I’d like to imagine some of their intentions were good to begin with...

So...All in all...Uchui is the son of the guy who made Izuru...

AND is the grandson of the REAL Izuru...

And he’s been sitting under our noses...how long?

Ever since 2016. He joined Hope’s Peak Academy that year.

But just like you Mondo, most of us didn’t even imagine Izuru had any kids. Much less one’s like this.

I’ve given you this information, and I think it’s best that I have a talk with Uchui about it.

I understand if he wants to refuse therapy, and I won’t force him to talk with me, but we at least need to tell him what we know. We can’t keep this knowledge secret from him.

However, I will of course, let you make the final decision on that, Chihiro.

...No, I agree with you.

But please, let ME talk to him. He trusts me, and knows I won’t do any harm.

I would still be wary if I were you Chihiro. With how bad his outburst was last time, we don’t quite know how Uchui might react if we confront him.

Fine. I’d like you all to come with me then, but please, I insist upon doing the talking.

[empressofthesunwriter]

To Belong

She was the weird foreign girl, he was the most useless Viking in the history of Berk. Together they were just Leandra and Hiccup. Two best friends who searched for their place in the world. Would their search for it unite or separate them?

Chapter 2

The good thing about having a pregnant stepmother?

The baby makes her tired, so she doesn’t yell at you that much because you nearly lost your life.

The bad thing is that she still wants to forbid you to see your best friend.

Thank the Lord, that her papi understands how important her bond with Hiccup is.

Without him, she would be all alone on the island. The other Viking teens, even if they are a year younger than her, don’t associate with her either.

Oh, they let her heal them, but like with the adults, she was the weird foreigner.

Nothing more.

It had hurt, but one day Leandra decide that if people didn’t like her for her then they weren’t worth her time.

It was wasted energy and with it, she could do more.

Like spending her time with Hiccup who always has liked her.

Anyways, she could still be friends with Hiccup but her parents grounded her. She should stay for the next few days in her room, only getting out for food and when she needed to do her healer job with Gothi.

Nonetheless, to say the second her room door was closed, Leandra strapped her dagger, last year’s Snoggletog/Christmas gift from Hiccup, on her brown belt and made her way over to her window.

With years of practice breaking out, she opened it without a sound and reached for the tree that grow beside it. She gripped the tree branch and hosted herself up to it. Then she put a piece of wood on the window frame so it was closed and wouldn’t make sounds, but she could open it without a problem getting back to her room.

Mindful of her blue dress with her black kirtle she climbed down the tree.

When she was on the ground she made haste to Raven Point.

Knowing Hiccup so good as she did, he was surely already out there searching for the fallen Night Fury.

She wouldn’t leave him alone on his quest. That’s why she took her dagger with her.

If…If they needed to end things.

Leandra hoped not, she didn’t think she had the stomach for it to actually kill something, but if it was Hiccup and her life against the dragon…then she would choose them.

Still, it didn’t make her feel good about herself. Probably because she wasn’t a Viking and doesn’t have killing dragons in her blood.

Her father was actually a merchant before they landed themselves on Berk.

Leandra hears his nasal voice before she sees him: “Ugh, the gods hate me. Some people lose their knife or their mug. No, not me. I manage to lose an entire dragon.”

“Then maybe you could try my god?”, she calls for him.

He turns around and blinks surprised at her.

“Lee, they let you out? No wait for a second, you broke out, right.”, he corrects himself.

“Of course.”, she replies nodding. “I wouldn’t leave you alone with the dragon. Brought my dagger with me too.”

She points at it, while Hiccup grins.

“You are the best friend someone can ask for.”

“Aww shush, best friend till our death even beyond, right partner?”

A crooked smile forms on his lips. “Could be difficult since we have two very different versions of the afterlife.”

“We will find a way, we always do!”

“Yeah if we only could find this dragon.”

Frustrated Hiccup whacks a low-hanging branch. It snaps back at him, hitting him in the face.

“Damn Hic!”, shouts Leandra worried, and checks his eye. “All good?”

“I can still see if you were worried about that.”, he answers her drily.

“Well, you didn’t poke your eye out so I count this as a win.”

That’s when both teenagers see a snapped tree trunk. Their eyes, one pair green, one brown, follow it to a long trench of upturned earth.

“Do you think…”

“…That the Night Fury is this way, yes I do, Lee.”

Together the two teenagers follow it. Hiccup has to help Leandra since in her dress it is difficult to walk on the upturnend earth. This are the moments in life where the young girl thinks it must be nice to be a Viking girl and be allowed to wear Tunics with pants under it or skirts with pants.

She and Hiccup nearly faceplanted a few times.

They see at the same time the downed dragon and formally fall down on the forest ground to hide from it.

“Do you think it is death?”, Leandra whispers to Hiccup.

This would make things easier for them.

The brunette boy checks at the dragon again.

“Lee, I will go near it, you stay here.”, he suggests to her.

“The moment something is happening, I’m coming.”

“Thanks for always having my back.”

The black-haired girl nods and pats his back.

“I got you, bro!”

Careful Hiccup walks over the downed, black dragon, its body and tail tangled in a bola. It really appears dead.

Hiccup approaches, beaming.

“Oh wow. I did it. I did it. This fixes everything. Yes!”, he celebrates. He strikes a victory pose, planting his foot on the fallen Night Fury. “I have brought down this mighty beast!”

Suddenly it shifts!

The boy springs back, terrified.

“Hic!”, hisses Leandra from her hiding place, ready to jump out.

“I-It’s o-okay! Stay!”, he stutters taking out a tiny dagger. The girl deadpans at the thing, the one he made for her is bigger than this little something. “Stay where you are.”

“I hope you know what you do!”

Yeah, Hiccup hopes it too.

He creeps along the length of the weak, wounded dragon, dagger poised to strike. As he reaches the head, Hiccup finds the Night Fury staring coldly at him. He tries to look away, but he's drawn back to its unnerving, unflinching stare.

With the dragon safety tangled in the ropes, Hiccup jabs with his dagger, puffing himself up with false bravado.

“I'm going to kill you, Dragon. I'm gonna cut out your heart and take it to my father. I'm a Viking. I am a VIKING!”, he yells the last part.

Meanwhile, Leandra got her own dagger out and is ready to jump on Hiccup’s side any moment.

This is so nerve-wracking!

The brunette raises the dagger, determined to prove his Viking-ness.

The dragon's labored breathing breaks Hiccup's clenched concentration.

He opens an eye, uncertainty leaking through.

The dragon holds the stare.

Something profound is exchanged.

Finally, the Night Fury closes its eye and lowers its head resigned to its fate.

Leandra swerves she is going to have a heart attack. What is going on? Why won’t Hiccup finish the dragon off?

She answers her own question, at the same time Hiccup lowers the dagger.

Her best friend is a lot of things.

Loyal.

Kind.

Brilliant.

Sarcastic.

But he is not a killer.

Even if it’s a dragon…in the end it’s a living creature and Hiccup hates to hurt other beings.

“Hiccup…”, she whispers quietly.

He stands up, ashamed of himself, and turns away from the dragon.

“I did this…”

His eyes find the eyes of his best friend. He only sees understanding in the warm brown orbs. Leandra will not think less of him, because he couldn’t do it.

Actually, she seems relieved that he didn’t do it. At least he will always have her on his side.

He turns to leave.

Pauses.

And glances back at the dragon, chest heaving.

“Lee.”, he calls out to her. “I’m about to do to something crazy, stay where you are, okay? I don’t want that you get hurt.”

“What are you about to do-HICCUP?!”, the last part she shrieks as she sees how Hiccup starts to cut the robes that hold the dragon.

Oh no, she will not leave him alone.

She leaves her hidey spot and joins him in cutting the robes with her own dagger.

“I told you to stay out of this!”, Hiccup reprimands her.

“Yeah, and I can’t let you do it alone. We both kinda did this to the dragon!”

As the last rope falls free, the Night Fury suddenly pounces!

In a blur, the dragon is upon them, pinning Hiccup and Leandra down, and grazing their necks.

It’s looking like it's about to kill them.

Hiccup is paralyzed. Leandra can’t even think.

The dragon's breath ruffles their hair.

The boy opens his eyes to find the Night Fury's wolf-like stare boring into him.

The exchange is intense and profound.

The dragon draws a deep breath, as though it's about to torch the two teenagers, then lets out an ear-piercing scream instead.

It turns and takes flight, flapping violently through the canopy of trees. It bashes against a nearby mountainside, recovers, and drops out of view some distance away.

“Dios mio!”, huffs Leandra shocked.

They are alive!

Both carefully stand-up and help each other. Holding each other hands tight the two teenagers want to leave, and that’s when Hiccup faints and nearly drags Leandra with him to the ground.

It is also when Leandra can’t hold her tears anymore and she cries beside her fainted friend.

“It’s loco….LOCO!”, the girl cries, still holding the hand of her best friend.

They should be dead, they aren’t dead.

What.

What.

WHAT?!

Leandra doesn’t know for sure how long Hiccup was out, but she checked him carefully after he finally woke up.

Not that he hit his head.

In silence, the two best friends return to their homes.

About what could they talk? How they freed a dragon and it showed mercy on them?

It was unheard of.

It was mindblowing!

Anybody for themselves needed time to work through it.

So they said goodbye to each other with a wave and enter their respective homes.

As she lies in her bed, her parents non then wiser about her little breakout, she can’t help herself putting her hand on her still beating heart.

It is the only proof that she really is alive.

She falls asleep, the green eyes of the Night Furry haunting her.

The next day Leandra is collecting herbs for Gothi, when she sees her best friend with an axe on his way to the Kill Ring.

That…is strange.

“Hiccup!”, she calls out to him. “Yo, Hic, you got a minute?”

He looks relieved to see her and stops by her side.

“Hey, Lee, getting herbs for Gothi like every morning.”

“Yeah, that’s normal for me. What isn’t normal on this morning is you with this axe.”, she remarks drily. “And on his way to the Kill Ring.”

Hiccup makes a face, while she crosses her arms.

“My dad put me into Dragon Training.”, he answers her.

Leandra’s chin meets the floor.

“He finally let you in? Didn’t you always say he was against it?”

“Change his mind, only the gods know why.”

Warily she looks around. None of their neighbors seem to give them any attention.

“Hic, you aren’t a dragon killer.”, she whispers to him. “We both actually prove this yesterday, how the heck do you want to survive Dragon Trainer?!”

The poor boy signs loudly.

“I tried to tell my dad that I didn’t want to join, but you know him. He never listens to me-“

“-And when he does, it's always with this disappointed scowl. Like someone skimped on the meat in his sandwich.”, adds Leandra, having heard this often enough from him. She gives him a sympathetic look. “I know better than to ask, sorry. Just…yesterday was crazy.”

“Who are you telling this.”

Both best friends smile wobbly at each other.

“I better go.”

“I better get these herbs to Gothi.”

“See you, Lee, probably.”

“Till later, Hic, surely.”

The rest of the morning is normal for Leandra. She gets these herbs to Gothi and both make ointments. Then the old wise Viking woman teaches her some new healing techniques, till it’s time for the ointment deliveries.

Practically Leandra wastes her time till lunch by running around the village to go from door to door to give her neighbors some new ointment or even tea which are good for the health.

She is like Berk’s own Red Redding Hood, just without the hood, the wolf, and the grandma.

When it’s finally time can go to the Great Hall for lunch, she sees how Hiccup sneaks into the forest.

For a second she really had to battle with herself since food made her happy and she was hungry like a wolf, but she couldn’t leave Hiccup alone.

Only god knows what crazy thing he is doing again, so she better follow him.

Leandra reaches him as he studies the remnants of the discarded bola. You know the one who hold the Night Furry the other day and they both cut through.

“So...why didn't you?”, mutters her best friend to himself.

“Who, so why didn’t you?”, she repeats.

Not expecting another person Hiccup shrieks like a little girl and turns to her.

“Lee! You scared me!”

“I can see that. So what has your pantys all in a twist?”

He motions for her to follow him. They take the path the Night Furry took when it flew off.

While walking he tells her about what happened at Dragon Training and Gobber’s words who didn’t leave him alone.

A dragon always goes for the kill.

But the Night Furry didn’t kill either of them.

So what was up with that?

That’s why Hiccup is searching for it. Maybe if he sees it again, he can understand it.

“That’s crazy.”, deadpans Leandra. “And I’m also crazy because I actually agree with you and follow you.”

“Maybe it’s an outcast thing.”, Hiccup tries to joke.

“That we lost our marbles, sure, Hic, why not?”

They drop into a rocky crevice and follow it to a cove complete with a pristine spring pool. Both scan the high stone walls then Hiccup notices a single black scale on the ground. He crouches and picks it up, studying it.

“Lee, look.”

The girl puts her hands on her knees and leans forward to look at the scale.

“Well, it was definitely here.”

“I don’t see it.”, responds Hiccup shaking his head. “Well, this was stupid.”

They can’t even look that fast as suddenly, the Night Fury blasts past them. Both teenager recoil and grip the arms of the other.

“Woah!”, can’t Leandra helps it to shout.

The Night Furry struggles to climb the walls. It flaps violently, then peels away to a rough landing. The dragon is clearly trapped.

Leandra and Hiccup let go of each other and watch fascinated by how the dragon tries to leave the cove.

It fails miserably each time.

That’s when Hiccup pulls a leather-bound book from his fur vest and flips past drawings of weapons to a blank page. He sketches the dragon quickly, desperate to record the image.

“Why don't you just...fly away?”, wonders Hiccup.

Leandra pinches her eyes. She asks herself the same. It is then that she notes the problem.

“His tailfin, Hiccup.”, she reveals to her best friend, gripping his shoulder and shaking him a bit. “He misses a part of it!”

Hiccup corrects fast his drawing.

“Is…is this our fault?”, the girl asks feeling bad.

Not only feeling bad, she feels guilty. She has seen how much the dragon is struggling and can’t even catch himself some fish to eat.

They freed it, but it seems doomed anyway.

Before Hiccup can answer her he accidentally drops the charcoal stick. It rolls off of the rock outcropping that hides him from view and bounces into the cove.

The Night Fury raises his head, spotting Hiccup and Leandra.

The dragon and the boy such exchange a profound, unflinching stare that Leandra feels like intruder.

Like she wasn’t meant to be part of this.

It a strange feeling.

Leandra sits at her windowsill looking out the storm which is brewing on Berk.

Rather would she be in the Great Hall with Hiccup eating, but this goes against her grounding. She is only allowed to lunch there since after it she still helps Gothi out.

Oh yeah, Gothi.

Whining she rubs the bump on the back of her head courtesy of Gothi’s Stick. She earned this because she came back to the old Viking woman way past lunchtime.

Finding and watching the Night Furry and getting back to the village had taken some time.

The black-haired girl is just glad that Gothi scolded her for being late, gave her the bump, and wouldn’t say anything to her parents.

The village elder wasn’t someone who snitched. She rather resolved problems alone.

Whatever, she was back home and wished rather be on the side of her best friend.

They had talked a bit before they left to do their daily chores.

Sadly it was nothing really enlightenment.

They knew nothing about Night Furries.

So there was not much to discuss.

Only Hiccup promised he would find a way to search for some more information.

What they would do with it?

No idea…maybe just understand the dragon better?

Leandra signed and stand up.

Nervous she walked around her room.

It didn’t leave her mind that the dragon was hurt because of them.

She may only have become a healer to not die of boredom on Berk, but after a good four years with Gothi she had healer instincts.

And that instincts told her to help to heal the clear wound the dragon had on his missing tailfin.

“I hope I won’t regret it.”. she mumbles to herself.

The girl sits down on her desk and grips her first book with healing plants in it.

If she wanted to heal the dragon, then she needed the right ointment, so better check all her healing books to find the right plants.

It was going to be a long night.

Hello to all my readers. ^^

I hope you are enjoying till now Leandra’s story.

Now I have a question for you since I need your help.

I can’t decide what dragon Leandra should get.

I narrowed it down to two awesome ones, but I can’t decide.

So you guys are going to vote.

I’m putting on fanfiction net and Quotev a voting poll with options.

So please go to one of the sites and vote.

I will give you a week.

Also 11.02.2023 is the last day you can vote, alright?

Thanks already for your help!

Have a nice day/night!

Next

[amandabe11man]

the unwanted touching-saga continues...(no other “incident” has happened though don’t worry) what joy! 

so like, I did manage to talk to the guy about it on my own, he apologized and we left it at that after I made some things clear to him. then, weeks later, our supervisor takes me aside and tells me that someone told her abt what happened at that party and they thought she should know. so we sat down and talked about it, just me and her. she’s been really supportive and firm in that, while we don’t have to make a huge deal out of it, she’s not just gonna ignore this either. i was relieved actually, because I had considered just going to our supervisor instead of talking to the guy in question (because awkwardness), so it was nice that someone else brought it up with her before I did, or she might have never known about this, and, I gotta say-- it’s a real comfort to have someone else know about it and take action. that way, I don’t have to carry it all on my own.

anyway, some weeks after THAT talk, I had a meeting with our supervisor and the lady who’s essentially her boss and our employer, so now she knows as well and it’s nice. they said they were gonna have a meeting with the guy as well to talk to him about it too, and guess what? their meeting with him happened TODAY, and according to what our supervisor relayed to me later, he’s still really sorry and wants to make things right, so that’s good.

what’s perplexing though is that he keeps holding onto the fact that he wasn’t as drunk as I've said he was and him being drunk or not isn’t really the issue, but still... I'm not lying about that. all the people in our group who were at the party could see that this guy ended up being most drunk out of all of us. like-- by the time we all went home, he was slurring so much you could hardly understand him. he couldn’t find his jacket on the rack so another one of us found it for him. not only that, but when THE guy went to get more beer earlier that night, the other one sitting next to me was like “hasn’t he had enough by now?” at me, and I was like “mhmmmm probably” -- so like, there are people who can vouch for the fact that this guy was drunk. I wouldn’t make that up to make things seem worse than they were, cause I'm not interested in witch hunts or any shit like that

anyway, the meeting between him, the supervisor and employer went well, BUT.... the supervisor said that he would like to speak to me about it again, and at first I was like “nope :)” cause even though it would be between the four of us, it’s still so fucking embarrassing I don’t even wanna associate myself with this, right? our supervisor told me to think about if I wanted to talk with him about it again, weighing the pros and cons and whatnot, and eventually, I changed my mind. just speaking my mind outright is ultimately way better and more transparent than having our supervisor act as messenger all the time, and I feel like-- while I would absolutely rather NOT do this-- I reckon it’s still the best way to really hammer home to this guy how I feel about all this. I've forgiven him in a way, but the mental blockages are still there, and I simply don’t like him as much anymore now. maybe I wasn’t clear enough on not being interested in him, but he still broke the trust I had in him as a coworker, and idk. ultimately, I just wish that he hadn’t fucking touched me back then, and none of this awkwardness (and him feeling bad about it) would’ve had to happen. we would still be able to talk as we used to before it happened. i wouldn’t be subtly avoiding him like I’m doing now.

idk if I'll ever fully trust him again or want to be near him and that sucks, because things were fine the way they were before. while there are others in the group I'm friendlier with, I still considered him as something of a friend and coworker. so yeah, while I may have contributed to the confusion earlier by not being clear enough, the fallout happening now is still all because of him, and only him. as much as I would love to forget everything about it, my brain won’t let me just yet, so like. cool. thanks 👍

[crying-over-cartoons]

Focus (Chapter 1)

(Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - 2012)

Next chapter

Also on AO3

Mikey has always struggled the most with meditation.

"Today is a day for meditation, my sons. A day of recollection and rest- just as important as physical training."

Great, meditation. Mikey's least favourite thing to do.

It wasn't like he didn't appreciate the rest- since they'd first ventured to the surface, it felt like things were always happening. There was always something going on, someone to fight, something to do or worry about. He was grateful for a day to calm down and recenter.

But no matter how many times Splinter tried to teach him meditation, he never seemed to do it as well as his brothers. He just couldn't clear his mind like they could. It had always been a struggle for Mikey. He just couldn't sit still, couldn't keep his brain still.

Nevertheless, he fell into line with his brothers and sat down. Splinter sat facing them, and they closed their eyes.

Splinter took a deep breath, and his sons did too. Deep breath in, let it out slow. Clear your mind.

Mikey could hear his brothers breathing, and could feel the air in his own lungs. The air down here was kind of humid. It was usually drier up above, unless it had been raining. Mikey liked the sound of rain, the soft patter bringing him a sense of peace. When was the next storm supposed to be, anyway? The rainy season was in spring, but it was currently fall, marching closer to winter. Mikey wasn't a big fan of winter- he mostly associated it with brumation, though he and his brothers hadn't brumated last year and probably wouldn't this year. It was easier to stay awake during winter when they didn't have to worry as much about food, or the cold (thanks to Donnie installing a heating system). Mikey was glad he wouldn't have to brumate with Donnie, his tooth gap whistled when he slept and it was distracting.

Distracting! They'd been meditating for just a few minutes and Mikey had already allowed himself to get off-track. Focus, focus, you're not focusing! Just breathe, clear your mind.

Honestly, Donnie's breathing was kinda distracting even when he was awake. Was he breathing really loudly or was he just close? Leo was on Mikey's other side, and he was pretty sure he wasn't breathing as loudly as Donnie. Mikey couldn't hear Raph or Splinter's breaths from here, so maybe Donnie really did just breathe loudly. Though Raph also snored, so maybe it just depended on the situation. Leo could get loud when he talked about Space Heroes. And Mikey was well aware that he could be really loud, often not even realizing until someone told him to keep it down.

Dammit, he'd gotten distracted again! He felt a crease form in his brow. Why couldn't he just focus?

The rug they were sitting on was rough. It scratched against Mikey's right leg as he bounced his knee up and down.

"Mikey, would you please keep still?"

"Sorry, D." He stopped bouncing. He hated distracting his brothers like that. Sure, he liked annoying them, but that was just a little brother thing. He didn't want to actually upset them, and being a distraction during meditation or training was a good way to do that.

He didn't really understand how they managed to stay focused on whatever they wanted. Mikey could only focus on some things, and those things seemed to change all the time.

There were days where he'd be super on-task during training, completely focused and present, and Leo would pat him on the shell and say, "Good focus today, Mikey."

And then other days he'd be too busy thinking about what Raph was doing across the room, or his plans after training, or that TV show he'd been watching, or that snake he found the other day, or-

"Mikey! I told you to stop bouncing your leg, you keep bumping me!"

Mikey opened his eyes to find Donnie glaring at him. He grinned. "Sorry, sorry, I just got a little distracted."

Leo opened his eyes. "Distracted by what? You had your eyes closed, and there's nothing going on."

"You guys were breathing."

"I really don't see how breathing can be a distraction. Everyone breathes, all the time," Raph said.

"Not if you're underwater- unless you're a fish."

"My sons, we are supposed to be meditating. I understand focus can be a challenge for you, Michelangelo, but that is why you must practice. Clear your mind of all thoughts, and regain your focus."

Mikey closed his eyes, and took a deep breath in, and let it out slow. Took a deep breath in, and let it out slow. Took a deep breath in, and let it out slow.

Why was it so much easier for the others? Raph sometimes had trouble focusing, but that was usually because he got over-emotional, and he'd gotten better over time. Leo had mastered meditation at a young age, and Donnie had always had good focus. April and Casey didn't usually meditate with them, but even in battle they weren't as easily distracted as Mikey.

Something burned in his chest. He didn't know what it was. Resentment, maybe? Frustration, that his brothers all seemed to take to this so easily while he floundered? He'd been trying, for years, for his entire life, to be as good as his brothers. And he knew he was good at some things- he was fast, and a skilled fighter, and he could be sneaky if he really needed to be- but he always lost focus, or wandered off, or forgot what they were doing and made too much noise, or distracted his brothers, or-

"Mikey!"

His eyes snapped open. Oh, shoot, he'd started bouncing his knee again! Stupid, stupid, stupid!

"Sorry, D, didn't mean to-"

"You keep apologizing, but you're not changing your behaviour! Just stay still, it's not that hard!"

"Not for you, maybe! I know you're like, the king of focus, or whatever, but I get distracted by everything!"

"Well, if you would just try-"

"Do you think I'm not trying? 'Cuz I am, it's just not working!"

"Michelangelo, Donatello! Both of you, quiet."

Mikey could feel tears pulling at his eyes. He didn't want his family to see him cry over something so stupid. So he stood and left for his own room.

He heard someone move to follow him, but Splinter stopped him. "Continue your meditation. I will check on your brother."

He didn't want Splinter to check on him. He wanted to crawl under his blanket and have a good cry, alone. So, as soon as he reached his room, he locked the door.

He wrapped himself in his blanket, ignoring the soft knock on the door. It was almost funny- wasn't storming off Raph's thing?

"Michelangelo, I understand that you are frustrated. But that is no excuse to take it out on your brothers, or on me. Please unlock your door so we can discuss this."

Mikey knew better than that. This wasn't the first time this, or something similar, had happened- and Mikey knew that as soon as he left his room, Leo would be there to reprimand him. He couldn't hide from it forever, but it'd be nice to try for at least a few hours.

After a few moments of silence, Splinter seemed to get the message.

"Come out when you are ready, my son. We will discuss your behaviour then."

Mikey waited for the footsteps to fade before he let himself cry.

-

decided to post this to tumblr as well! the fic is already complete, so the next chapter will be posted in a couple minutes.

[girldigital]

be easy please

With everyday that passes, I find myself falling more and more in love with the fantasy.

Of course I liked him. Even if there were some yellow (orange even) flags (okay red too), I am being a hypocrite and looking away. “Nothing I can’t fix”, I say confidently - and the worst part is I believe it. Pretty hard to be sure after one date, but I imagine it wouldn’t take too much given how similar we are already.

Anyway, negatives aside (which shall remain vague for now (shame)), he is technically a match. Not what I’m looking for, but clearly what I seem to be seeking hasn’t been working, so maybe it’s for the best.

After our date, I remember feeling good inside, but also very content with the friendly nature of it. It’s rare for me to feel sexual attraction towards anybody, but I typically know fairly early if I can see myself either passively or actively enjoying sex with a man. Then again, I think I’ve only felt keen to kiss during a first date twice, one of which just so happens to have taken place a week before meeting Aiden.

I can’t tell if that’s a good thing or not. Part of me thinks it is, because I have something very fresh to compare my feelings to, but on the other, I wonder if I would’ve been more sweped off my feet had it not happened. Frankly though, I don’t think so.

You see, Aiden and I too alike - to a point where it creates noticeable cracks in the fantasy. Suddenly, all I see are two dorks pretending not to be. Actually, he wasn’t even pretending, which in a way was worse as it forced me to renounce my usual act. While that might sound like a good thing, with that also comes any sort of sexual tension vanishing. Do I not believe I deserve to be loved for who I am? Maybe. Probably, in fact. It’s just hard to feel attracted to someone who reminds you of who you’re hiding.

Anyway, those are all things I felt during/right after. Now that it’s been a week of almost no coms, I find myself romanticizing him again, as if everything I felt in the moment during will magically fade away and leave room for the perfect narrative to take place.

Things that freaked me out in the flesh suddenly seem endearing. I catch myself imagining things I never have with others like marriage and fatherhood. Ew right...

While that’s slightly comforting (I have a heart!), I’m also painfully aware of the fact that I’m fetishizing the idea more so than I actually want him. I imagine myself telling my mom about the older, handsome Spanish architect I’m dating and her smiling in glee at the fact that she’s succeeded at veering me away from lesbianism. Wouldn't it be all so perfect?

Also, I was talking to Reboot and I realized a big part as to why I want to date a man, besides the warmth and validation, is that I will finally be able to d*ke-out in peace. Yes, I’m aware of the contradiction...

If I can explain myself though, my mom has always said in regards to me wanting to get tattoos : “When you marry, you can do whatever you want.” Even though that’s an obvious ridiculous statement, I haven’t been able to change her opinion through out the years. If anything, it’s now gotten worse as she requires her death before I can do anything - how dramatic. I’ve pushed the envelope in every way I could that doesn’t isn't permanent (haircuts, hair colors, bleached brows, piercings), but even still, every single one of these frustrate her to irrational levels. I think a big reason is that she sees them as ways I make myself more undesirable to men.

One of the things she said when we were fighting about my eyebrow piercing was: “What man would want a girl with that?”. I told her that I wouldn't want a man who would judge me for things this futile, which she agreed with but unfortunately still, I think my brain has successfully been rewired to associate freedom with male companionship. If only I were to be in a relationship with a man worthy of her praise, then I would finally be free to do as I please, without the weight of her disappointment and disapproval. That way, I can both prove to her that I can be lovable with the appearance she deems as unworthy, and most importantly, that, again, I am not the lesbo daughter of her nightmares yay! If I have a boyfriend, who cares if I’m a tatted up, short-haired, androgynous presenting gal right?

My life has been poisoned by conditions and I keep finding myself binding myself to them for no other reason than…I don’t know actually.

Anyway, I’m sleepy.

Before last night in BCN…