#so if i'm not very active here don't worry i'm just exhausted

[sentimental-boy]

i have seven days of training for my new job at the main branch out-of-town starting monday and i'm very excited to get to ride the train so much and dreading the actual logistics

[letorip]

Can you do headcanons for Jenna’s characters with a tall reader?

tall reader

it's been a little bit since i've been back on here and actively posted, but you know what i felt bad that i hadn't, so i did this to kind of assure everyone who didn't see my last thing that i'm still alive and well. sorry for not responding sooner to this request. also, if you see this, do not panic, i promise, i'm still finishing kiss with a fist [iii] and we’re only a few days from casual [iii]. the last thing i want is someone seeing me update and then immediately jumping into my inbox to ask about those, because i'm hard at work at them anyways

also, if you're not tall, just imagine it for a moment, lmao

wednesday addams

she’s not especially expressive, so she’ll never admit to it, but she absolutely loves that you’re so much taller than her. it’s cheesy and she knows you'll tease her about it, if she does mention it

she fumbles the bag at first, when during one of your first conversations, she says "you remind me of lurch." it's not exactly flattering to be told you remind her of her 40 year old butler who looks like a skeleton, and it makes you think she doesn't like you, at first, but to be fair, she meant it as a compliment

you try to brush past it, and wednesday too, and she's confused as to why you didn't seem flattered. enid's mouth drops open when wednesday recounts your interaction, and she tries to coach her through fixing her mistake

unfortunately your next conversation is only more awkward, when she walks it back and says "you DON'T remind me of lurch." she thinks it's a good way to recover from her previous error, but you just look even more confused, and she's suddenly walking off before she fucks up anything any more

she does manage to have an actual conversation with you later, after you take the turn to initiate, and that's how you two actually begin to grow closer and closer

even in her big ass platform boots, you’re still taller than her. it closes a little bit of the distance, but you're still much taller

she grabs your tie or bunches your shirt and pulls you down to her level, in order to kiss you. it hurts your neck sometimes, but you’d never ever tell her not to do it

even when she tugs you down for a kiss, she still has to stand on her tippy toes, especially if she’s only in socks

it does make you the ideal height for cuddling, though

wednesday claimed at first that she would cut your fingers off if you tried to hold her, but she slowly learns to crave it. all you have to do is give her a look and lift up your blanket, and she’ll crawl right in, especially if it’s after an investigation and she’s exhausted

theres just something oddly relaxing about curling up and feeling you wrap yourself around her. you’re definitely big spoon in this scenario. not that she wouldn’t hold you the same— she does, especially when she’s worried about the investigation but doesn’t want to say anything— but she likes how you’re able to completely wrap around her and how she can almost burrow herself into you

wednesday absolutely adores to sit on your lap. she’ll sit on your lap whenever and wherever she can. sideways with her arms around your neck, back to front with your arms around her waist, facing you in a straddle, during the more heated moments. she said she’d never be like her parents, but she also finds your lap to be the most comfortable seat around

she plops herself down onto your lap whenever she feels the person you're talking to is laughing a little too much at your jokes. she'll wander right over, wordlessly, sit down on your lap, wrap an arm around your neck, and stare at the person you're talking to with a usual disinterest, and they very quickly get the memo and leave

not that you realise this pattern, of course

you also use your height to help in the investigation. getting books for her off of high-up, dusty shelves, giving her a boost through windows that she shouldn't be breaking into, you name it. your willingness to assist her in her crazy plan is just part of what she loves about you

"can you reach that for me, cara mia?"

she does miraculously know your measurements, of course, when it comes to buying clothes. being tall makes clothes somewhat hard, but she always manages to buy the perfect sized thing, and you're starting to wonder if she somehow measured you, when you weren't paying attention

tara carpenter

you guys begin as sworn enemies after meeting at blackmore, and it results in a lot of mean insults about each others' height. she calls you the jolly green giant and you call her dwarf. she calls you giraffe, you call her stuart little. neither of you will admit that you find the other obnoxiously attractive

she says you're freakishly tall, but you're only a little taller than chad. she never annoys him about his height, only you, but for what it's worth, you annoy her right back

it culminates one night during a drunken hookup after you've shouted insults into each others faces. tara won't admit her anger is from seeing a random girl grind on you, and you won't admit you're annoyed that ethan and chad are obviously in love with her, and doing their best at flirting

you don't know who closes the distance first, but the next thing you know, you're messily pressing your mouths together and tara is climbing you like a damn tree, i mean, this is literally her

immediately after, you and tara try to pretend it didn't happen, and it lasts all of one week before she's jumping your bones again, only this time neither of you are drunk

you get together shortly after, but best believe the teasing doesn't stop. she'll still call you her little construction crane, and you'll smile with a faux sweetness and call her your little hobbit, until she smacks you on the arm

you're definitely a fiery couple, on both sides, but you do have your sweet moments

you give her piggyback rides because you're tall enough to do so, and she just happily wraps her arms around your neck and lets you carry her places. pretty much any time she gets tired enough (or even when she isn't really tired at all), she'll give you a cute pout and put her arms out, and you'll pick her up

tara loves to cuddle with you, but even then, sometimes you both squabble over the blanket, and she'll start complaining about how you hog the whole thing because of your height. it turns into a playful wrestling match, and while you have the obvious advantage and could flip her right around at any given moment, you let her climb on top of you and pin your arms above your head in a proud victory (which takes a lot of effort, considering how short she is)

of course, like all of your play-fights, it turns into something more

she doesn't like to talk about woodsboro, but she does find a comfort in how tall you are. it makes her feel a bit safer with you around, not that a couple inches would stop ghostface or anything

but she feels a genuine relaxation, when you can both be in bed together, and you're completely holding her in your arms, and it's not a thing she thought she'd feel again

you give her your jacket when she's cold, and she has to bunch the fabric around her elbows, or it'll absolutely swim on her. she always teases you about it, but the moment you jokingly threaten to take it back, she'll roll her eyes with a smile and tug it on with a kiss to your cheek

sometimes when you're cooking in the kitchen, she'll wrap her arms around your waist and let her head rest against the small of your back

you also help her when she's studying in the school library, by similarly grabbing books off the shelf for her

when she wants to rest her head on your shoulder, you still have to crane your neck down to let her. it's not super comfortable, but you still do it, because she looks adorable when she sleeps

she's figured out something seriously cruel. you complained about her feet being cold once, when you were snuggling, and ever since you mentioned it, tara realised she's the perfect height to press a cold foot right onto your back. she does it when she wants to start a play-fight, and it works like a charm every time

you're annoyed by it, but it definitely does make her laugh

lorraine day

your height is immediately what lorraine clocks onto, when she first sees you, because she's coming back from a shoot, getting dropped off by RJ, and she sees you in the distance, hopping a fence like it's no effort at all, when the same fence is a pain for lorraine to climb

you're the new ranch hand that her father hired while she was gone, and when she officially meets you, the both of you don't exactly get off on the right foot

you don't actually say much, which is something her father warned her of before you were introduced, but she at least expected some kind of "hello." instead, you just stare down at her from the shadow of your hat with a neutral nod, and then go off to get back to work. no giving her your name, no asking her any questions, no interest whatsoever

she doesn't know if she's more offended by your lack of manners or more upset you don't seem anywhere near as curious about her as she is about you

your height makes you ideal for most ranching activities though. you easily climb up and down from your horse and you're a speedy, fast rider.

when lorraine is on her shorter breed of horse, you're still as tall as her shoulders, and you help her get ready to go out on her horse with you and her father, even if it is wordlessly

she's only heard you speak a few times, and it's mostly been laughing with her father, which abruptly stops when lorraine gets close enough

after a rare bit of rain, lorraine's boots are slippery, and she slides out of the stirrup when dismounting way quicker than she was ready for. luckily, you're there to catch her, and she collides against you, pretty much right into your arms

unfortunately, you both fall back into a pile of horse shit, and the next thing she knows, she's hearing a nice, airy laughter coming from you. she's damn sure it's the first time she's seen you smile or laugh, and it's got her laughing too

she apologises, but you say "it's nothin," and you both kind of naturally grow closer from there

you help her up onto her horse, when she's without a saddle. you're tall enough to do so, and you hoist her up gently and set her on the animal's back with a small smile, and it kind of makes her heart beat real fast

it turns out the rough and tough cowboy exterior is a false image of you lorraine created in her mind. you're actually just a quiet, hot, tall, dork

you're feeding her horse a carrot or something, about to go out and do your job with lorraine eager to tag along, and she doesn't know what comes over her, but she leans down a little and plants a kiss right on your lips

she's the champion of sitting on stuff to reach your face: a fence, her horse, a hay bale. she likes being above you for once, and you're not complaining whatsoever

she tugs on the belt loop of your jeans when she wants you to lean down and kiss her. she also absolutely steals your baseball cap, and then to be funny, your cowboy boots, and she laughs about how big on her the cowboy boots are and clomps around in them

her family house has low ceilings, so it's kind of a pain to walk through, especially in your boots. for the most part, you live above the barn because of the higher ceilings, and sometimes (most nights) lorraine sneaks out to see you

she absolutely loves to sit on your shoulders. it's not especially comfortable for you, but you let her do it at the town events like fireworks and festivals and stuff. she sits on your shoulders for a "better view," and she'll rest her chin on top of your head

sorry to RJ, he's getting dumped the moment he comes back into town

cairo sweet

she doesn't even really realise you're tall at first, because she just sees you in your chair, on the second day of the new semester

you're new in town, a transfer kid and a cross country prodigy, with record times and future athletic scholarships up the wazoo, owed partially to being much taller than average. but the two most annoying things about you is that you can write, and you've read mr. miller's book

mr. miller seems rather pleased with having you in his class, and immediately it makes cairo hate you. her whole plan pretty much crumbles with you now in the way, and she absolutely loathes you for it

her new plan becomes to seduce you and distract you from school, and it works because you do harbour a giant, absolutely massive crush on her

your mother, who's also your coach, wants you to stay focused on athletics and not let cairo get in the way, but talking to her makes you melt, and when she finds you one day, in the locker room after everyone's left, you immediately cave when she sloppily kisses you and shoves her tongue into your mouth

your height is ideal for picking her up and pushing her back against the lockers, while her legs wrap around your waist

tree climber core again

she says it's just a scheme, but after you earnestly ask her out on a date and you both have a fantastic time, cairo's master plan goes out the window, and she just enjoys you for you

she goes to all of your meets, and she'll stand at the railing of the bleachers, and watch you with a smile (she's too fancy to cheer like a soccer mom out loud, but know she's really rooting for you on the inside)

you're like that one track couple at the olympics, if y'all have seen the clip. you finish your run in first place, qualifying for the state competition, and before anyone can congratulate you, you're running in cairo's direction, at the bleachers.

you're tall enough to the point that you just stand there on the ground, and cairo leans over the railing and kisses you, pulling away to cup your cheeks

your height is definitely a plus, in that when cairo is especially miffed at something mr. miller said or another student, after class, she'll grab your arm and wrap it around her shoulder

you barely fit on your twin-sized mattress, but cairo owns a king in her massive ass house, so it's a plus, whenever you go over to her place to "study"

just like with wednesday, when you're over at her house, you're the person who grabs her books off her shelf for her. she'll whisper a thanks and press a kiss to your cheek. sometimes she'll stand behind you and watch you grab a book off the shelf, just to see the stretch in your muscles and watch you move. she's just thinking "i'm no better than a man" while it happens

she love love loves to lay on top of you, on the sofa, when she's got a book to read. she'll just lay back against your chest, in your embrace, with a book in hand

she'll borrow your jacket, even though she complains it doesn't match her style, but it still swims on her

absolutely loves to be princess-carried to her bed when she falls asleep on the couch reading. she'll fall asleep because it's just too comfortable there, and you'll carry her up the stairs and tuck her in

she also grabs your collar and tugs you down to her for a kiss. either that, or she'll tug on your sleeve, which you now know is cairo saying she wants a kiss or a hug

[oceantruffle]

hotline

Characters - reader x Lando Norris

Location - I know Miami doesn't have any mountains but here I just felt like it so just go with it lol

summary - after being up and celebrating the whole night, you and Lando see the sunrise together.

A/N - It would be so nice if I had uploaded it before three days but I was very sleep deprived and the fact that I was in the middle of a forest for 4 days. anyways happy reading ✨

[y/n - your name]

Third Person's POV -

"I was meant to fly but Zak just told me we fly tomorrow so I'm not going to sleep. I'm going all the way. I might have more than just a scratch on my nose tomorrow, so I don't care, but I'll enjoy my time. This only happens once when you're taking your first win. It's nice to do it here in Miami,"

This was enough for you to know that the night is going to be absolutely crazy and wild. And you were very sure that none of you were gonna board the flight in one piece.

You were beyond the clouds. This was a feeling that no one could describe in mere words. The absolute bliss on Lando's face was ethereal. You could watch just him for eternity as he soaked up the sun on the podium. You were smiling so hard for so long seeing him this happy and you didn't realised that until your cheeks started hurting.

'I DID IT!' he had said holding the trophy towards you when he got back to the driver's room.

'YES!!YES YOU FUCKING DID!!' you said as you hugged him over the shoulders.

After 6 hours of clubbing and celebrating this sweet win with your boyfriend you had decided to go to a mountain top, alone. Maybe it was the alcohol which made the decision. You were more sober than him though. It was stupid. But nevertheless here you were now, sitting in the peaceful silence of the forest.

His head was in your lap and he could barely open his eyes. The alcohol was very heavy on his eyes. You both were freezing. Maybe not him since he had a jacket on but you definitely were cold.

You let your hand run through his soft curly hairs. A little chirp above in the tree got your attention. The stars in the sky above you had been staring had started disappearing. The dreamy dark night was filling with beautiful hopeful sunlight. That's when you realised it was morning. So it did happen. You were very happy for Lando. There are many more to come but wining this first one was a different feeling.

Lando was kind off in a passed out state but he was still very active and he quickly jolts his head when he hears little sniffs. Your tears fell onto his forehead as looks up to you.

'y/n?' he asked worriedly.

and when you sobbed a little louder he quickly sits back up to face you. 

'Baby?' he frowns. He got worried and all the exhaustion & sleep deprivation wasn't helping him much.

'What why are you crying?' he managed to frame a question,

'I don't know!' you sobbed.

'hey?' he said, his large hands cupping your face.

'I'm proud of you Lan. I'm so proud of you!' you smiled as tears rolled down your cheeks.

'Come here.' he said pulling you in his arms.

'Stop crying.' he soothed you.

'Please stop crying! haven't you already cried enough?' he said, now his own voice had started to break.

'Y/n?' he chuckled.

You look up to him to see his face and you see tears threatening to leave his eyes.

'I'm sorry! we're in the middle of nowhere, you're hungover, our phones are dead and i'm crying!' you shivered a little as cool breeze passes through.

'I love you y/n' he says.

'You deserve this Lando, You deserve the world..' you smile at him teary eyed.

'Thank you love!' he says softly resting his forehead against yours.

He wiped off your tears and kisses you on the forehead. You snuggled into him once again and watched the sun as it rises from the horizon.

There were countless times when you were up all night partying and eventually pass out in the morning. But this. This morning had something different in it. It had the feeling of glory, the joy and celebrations. You wanted to stay like that forever, in his arms. It was perfect and it wasn't a dream.

__________________

[word count - 875]

not edited

[thehollowwriter]

Summary: A short story in which you do trust falls with Floyd at Camp Vargas. It's goes better than you expected.

(Please reblog and leave a comment ❤)

Trust Falls

Trust falls. Such a simple little game. A game that, no doubt, one has played with their friends before, even though it's rare anyone actually let themselves fall.

To do trustfalls with friends is a fun, silly experience. To do trustfalls with Night Raven College students is sheer madness.

You felt your soul leave your body when Vargas announced this particular camp activity would be trust falls.

You were meant to be the photographer. No worries about participating in the often grueling and exhausting activities that sports clubs were doing. However Grim, the fuzzy little bastsrd, wouldn't behave himself and as punishment for nearly burning the cottage down you were to participate in one of the activities.

One the one hand, at least trust falls were relatively easy and not too strenuous. On the other hand, you had to place your trust in one of the NRC students here. Trust. What a laugh.

You looked desperately from student to student, hurrying to find someone thst wouldn't let you drop and laugh at you when you felt a pair of hands on your shoulders.

"Heeey Shrimpy!" Came that excited, high pitched drawl you knew all too well, and you tried your hardest to fight a sigh at your bad luck.

"Hey, Floyd."

Floyd twisted you around and leaned down so that the two of you were eye level. His grin was wide and full of mischief.

"How about I be your partner, eh?" He asked, teeth glinting in the sunlight that streamed through the trees. "I won't let you fall. I promise~"

You glared at him, huffing. "Nice try." You said and tried not to blush at your closeness. "But even if by some miracle you do catch me, I'll probably be flattened like a pancake trying to catch you."

Floyd laughed at that. It was a delightful sound, not that you'd ever admit it.

"You won't!" He said, the corners of his eyes crinkling. "At least I don't think so. I can do all the catching if you want~"

You sighed. "Okay. I'll be your partner. But only if you do all the catching. Deal?"

Another laugh from him. "It's a deal~"

When the activity began, you had a sinking feeling about trusting Floyd, fully regretting the deal already. You kept stopping yourself when you leaned back, snapping forward with a sudden jerk.

Floyd, for some odd reason, didn't seem bothered by your reluctance. He just stood there, not saying a word, and watched in silent amusement in an incredibly Jade-like fashion.

A shout from Vargas diverted your attention.

"Oi! There's no doubt in trustfalls, Prefect!"

And before you could react he sent a gust of wind magic your way that knocked you backwards.

You shrieked in surprise and scrambled to wildly to stay upright to, but to no avail. Alas, the ground was your destiny.

...Until you realised you were very much not lying in the dirt. Strong hands gripped you tightly, holding you in place. Floyd pressed the back of your head against his chest and laughed.

"Told ya I'd catch you, Shrimpy."

You couldn't help but be utterly convinced that if it weren't for the Great Seven's mercy you would've exploded on the spot.

"F-Floyd..."

Floyd pulled you up and wrapped his arms around you, trapping you in a tight hug. Smiling, he leaned down and and gently kissed your cheek.

"Heh, you're so cute. More a cute lil Sea Squirt than a Shrimp~"

You flushed and heartedly pushed at him. "Floyd there are other people here-!"

"Don't care." Floyd smiled at you. A softer, more genuine smile. "I could spend forever saving you when you fall~"

-End

....................................

A/N: Shockingly, I managed to produce smt lol. Life keeps finding new ways to beat me with a hammer and I'm never on here. Take this Floyd fic as an apology, I'm so sorry. I'm also sorry if it's not very good kfkfkffk

[lavend-ler]

tips on how to write cane user Neuvillette from a crutch user

Neuvillette uses a cane - and that's amazing! but increasingly I got worried that the portrayal of him being a cane user could be based on harmful stereotypes. hence I wanted to make a list on tips I can give as an irl crutch user

DISCLAIMER - this is in no way exhaustive list and I am no end all be all authority on this. I'm just a disabled person in fandom who is tired of ableism. of course this list can be used for other disabled characters but I esp wanna focus on Neuvillette (cause I love him)

Neuvillette is an occasional cane user (just like me) and that's totally fine. he doesn't have to use it all the time to be "disabled enough". he probably uses it during the days he feels worse

he holds cane in his right hand - that means it's his left leg which needs support (again, just like mine!)

a lot of disabled ppl are prone to the changes in the weather. I think it'd be interesting to keep in mind esp in Neuvillette's case

as long as we don't have the canon confirmation on what is Neuvillette's disability, all hcs are fair game. personally bc I relate to him I hc him with my own disability - arthritis

don't be afraid to portray him using his cane in combat. mobility aids are often used by disabled ppl not only as a support in walking but also in every day things. for example, he could be pushing buttons with it or helping himself while walking the stairs

bend the ableist stereotypes - make him use his cane and be badass with it. esp since he proudly uses it during his burst

canes make ppl more visible. don't fall into ableism and make characters only care abt Neuvillette when they notice him using the cane. if u choose to do so, make Neuvillette remark back, noticing how ppl treat him differently and unfairly

do not make jokes abt his cane. I have already seen ppl make jokes that he's an old man who needs to use the cane. it's disrespectful and unnecessary. don't bring up him being a cane user only when u talk how he's old

canes are very personal. even if others offer help or to hold it, Neuvillette would be against it

on that note DO NOT MAKE OTHERS CHARACTERS TAKE HIS CANE esp if u want to treat this as silly fun or even worse, romantic. Neuvillette's cane is his business and any character taking his cane from him would be extremally disrespectful

Neuvillette might have to take breaks between longer strolls to sit down and regenerate. again, sth that happens to me a lot

tho every character in Genshin has to be quite active, remember to portray Neuvillette to be relaxing too! he can be badass, active and strong and that won't make him any less when he's relaxing. I absolutely suggest u portray how he relaxes after the day and how he takes care of himself. maybe a calming tea or some ice packs - those are definitely great options for chief justice to relax and ease his aches after an eventful day

HERE is another post that focuses on more on experiences of mobility aid users. I find it very relatable and useful, it's a fantastic further read

hope these will be helpful for u! ablebodies please don't derail. other mobility aid users, feel free to add more things to the list <3

[chiharuhashibira]

Hello! I really like your works and i want to make a request,basically headcanons of genya,kaigaku and obanai with a s/o that has anemia(feels weak/tires very often,has headaches,loss of appetite,Shortness of breath with mild activity or even at rest,Numbness and tingling of hands and feet) but still being a sweet and shy person even when its feeling weak, maybe they would met reader in the butterfly state(obanai) or even they are childhood friends to lovers(genya and kaigaku).

If youre not comfortable with this youre free to decline! Have a nice day/afternoon/night

Thank you for the request @ultravioletqueen~

No worries! I would love to write about this! 💓

𝓜𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽

𝑨 𝑻𝒊𝒎𝒆 𝑶𝒖𝒕 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝑯𝒊𝒎

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬: 𝐎𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐢 𝐈𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐨, 𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐲𝐚 𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐳𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐰𝐚 & 𝐊𝐚𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐤𝐮

Content Warnings: None ^^

The headcanons would be SFW and fluffy just for you~

----------------------------------------------------------------------

🌸𝑶𝒃𝒂𝒏𝒂𝒊 𝑰𝒈𝒖𝒓𝒐🌸

❥ You never thought that meeting the Snake Hashira, Obanai Iguro, at the Butterfly Mansion would change your life.

Obanai was sitting quietly at the engawa with bandages on his chest. It was obvious that he had just arrived from a mission, and coincidentally, you just did too. You are aware that Hashiras are someone that you can't just easily approach, so you gave him a bow and wished him good morning. Thinking that he wouldn't answer back, you stood up and started walking away when he called you back, raising an eyebrow with your actions. You were scared that perhaps you'd hit a nerve and he was pissed off with your actions, but no. Obanai patted the seat beside him and asked you to sit down and accompany him for a while. And there, impromptu conversations about how his mission went or casual introductions innocently arise. Both of you never knew that this moment would spark a deeper connection between you and him. Curiousness brought the two of you together. Obanai knew about your weak body and how it never stopped you from becoming a demon slayer, and you knew about his flaws that led him to this path. A simple admiration at first, but it eventually led the two of you to care so much about each other that it made both of you fall in love.

❥ Knowing how frail you are, Obanai became so protective. Whenever he is done with his missions, he makes sure to visit you at the Butterfly Mansion, bringing you your favourite dango.

❥ You stopped going on missions and decided to just help at the Butterfly Mansion. But even the mildest work would exhaust you. Your headaches were bad, and even Kocho-san told you that you are anaemic, so you shouldn't tire yourself. But then, you don't want to be a burden, so you still insist on helping. And whenever the news of you overdoing yourself reaches Obanai, he'll suddenly pop out of nowhere inside your room, in the middle of the night, giving you a concerned look.

"I told you that you shouldn't be doing so much, right, Y/N?" Obanai sits beside you with Kaburamaru on his neck. You tried to sit up but he stops you from doing so. "Just rest. I'll stay with you."

❥ Nights like this aren't full of enthusiasm, but they aren't gloomy either. Obanai was too tired to scold you out, and he also knows that you wouldn't follow him anyway if he insists you just rest until you recover. The numbness in your hands began to subside as Obanai's warm fingers softly wrapped around them.

❥ He wouldn't say it loudly, but you know how much Obanai wants to take care of you. Whispers of apologies came out of your mouth, as you really hated worrying him. But Obanai would stop all of them with a gentle embrace.

❥ As much as you wanted to just kiss his lips, he says he's too afraid to expose his face to you. Scared. A feeling you didn't think he could possibly have. But the bandages around his face didn't stop him from planting a kiss on your forehead. "Sleep now. I'm here." He always says this before you drift into a good night's sleep.

❥ Even if you've already gained some of your strength, Obanai will still visit you. Too often, the girls at the mansion would tease you. Obanai would usually ignore them and ask you to come with him to the engawa, where you first met.

❥ The Snake Hashira would casually intertwine his hands with yours, making your heart skip a bit. The headaches are still there, but you seem to forget about them when Obanai's with you.

❥ Obanai would still make sure you were okay, even if he returned from his assignment injured. You're one of his priorities, and he never fails to make you feel that way.

❥ He would always blush whenever you told him that he was the most important man in your life. You swear that you saw Kaburamaru blush too.

❥ Obanai would deny it, but he really loves hearing you say those words. Heck, he would kill just to see your smile. Obanai loves you so much that he cannot contain himself at times. Sometimes between your cuddling sessions at night, when the dizziness overtakes your body, he will ask things like, "What if you just lived with me?" or "Would it be better if I stayed with you longer? He really wanted to give you everything, but being a Hashira is tougher than it looks.

❥ You know that you're not allowed to fight with your physical state anymore, so sometimes you feel jealous. Especially whenever you see Kanroji-san with your precious Obanai. In times like that, you'll often avoid him, swatting his hand away from you whenever he tries to touch you. And being Obanai, he would let you cool down, leaving you alone for an hour. And when he finds you crying, as this happens most of the time because of insecurity, he will always pull you into his arms, soothing the tingles on your body.

❥ Perhaps a few more jealous moments led him to reveal his full self to you. You were flabbergasted at first as you saw the huge scar across his mouth. The pain he had endured was too much, and it almost made anger bubble up in the pit of your stomach. But then Obanai seizes the moment to give you a long-overdue kiss. In between kisses, he said something about how much he loves you that made all the jealousy and insecurity fade away.

"I love you, Y/N... I'll always be with you." He says. Once again, your world slowed down.

❥ Obanai would never admit it, but he would want to be with you forever. He would take all your pain if he could. And of course, you might hear those words soon too. Just as his I love you casually escapes his lips now whenever he is with you.

🌸𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒚𝒂 𝑺𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒛𝒖𝒈𝒂𝒘𝒂🌸

❥ Genya has always been a hot-headed child, perhaps since you met him. He was full of scars, and you'll bet that even his heart was full of these wounds.

❥ All you wanted to do was be his friend, so despite all his attempts to shoo you away, you still stayed. Your radiance gave him a second chance to find his path. Or perhaps that sunshine was just seen when he was with you. Your patience made him soften up a bit and finally made him fall for you.

❥ Now, as a hot-headed teen, you were always telling him to be nicer to other people. But Genya won't listen. He'll still close his doors for others, except for you.

❥ Every day after his training, he would visit your home, checking if you were alright, as lately you have been feeling under the weather. Weaker than before, the tingles caught up to your body, giving you headaches that always stole your chance to sleep. Genya is concerned and will try everything to comfort you.

❥ Despite this weaker state, sometimes you still find yourself tangled up with him, giving him lazy kisses that definitely soothe your tremors. Genya would casually run his fingers through your hair, giving you a gentle massage that would eventually teleport you to your dream world.

❥ Genya would frequently bring you flowers, and he'd get quite red-faced anytime you kissed him after he gave them to you. He would go out of his way to make you feel at ease in his company, even at the expense of his own privacy. When you fell asleep on his lap, he'd use the time to give you a relaxing head rub. No one would have guessed that this rough-looking guy actually cares about you.

❥ Genya would notify Himejima-san to come home and take care of you when your anaemia became too much to bear. Your family and Genya's were both killed by demons, and once the two of you became lovers, Genya took it upon himself to be there for you through everything. He would give you massages, make you tea, and even help you take a bath. Turning bright red every time he does the latter.

"Why are you so red? You would often tease him, which would eventually make him grunt. The boy is just too flattered to be around you, especially when you're bare and vulnerable in front of him.

❥ But of course, those little teasing will lead to you taking the initiative to kiss him, relieving your weariness and the tension between you two. You just love this boy so much.

❥ You could see that Genya put forth his best effort, even if he was unable to use Breathing Styles. It's not always you who's exhausted. You'll embrace him casually from behind when he's at his lowest, telling him he's the greatest Demon Slayer you've ever seen in hushed tones. And even if the boy turned as red as a tomato, he would turn towards you and plant small kisses on your lips, wishing his frustrations would just permanently fade away.

"I don't know why you're this nice to me because even my big brother hates me..." He says this after your kiss, blaming himself for the past and his present relationship with his own brother. "Because you deserve to be loved, Genya. I love you so much."

❥ Genya won't ever say that he loves you back. He's just afraid that if he does, you'll be gone like his family. But you will always assure him that that thought won't ever happen. And because of it, eventually Genya opened up and finally told you his first "I love you too, Y/N.", deepening the bond between the two of you.

🌸𝑲𝒂𝒊𝒈𝒂𝒌𝒖🌸

❥ Kaigaku, the man who lived with his bad side all his life, never knew that somehow, beneath those dark pasts, you would manage to be a big part of his life.

❥ He was once a childhood friend until your destiny took you away from him. Perhaps this is one of the reasons he became angry with the world.

❥ But one day, he came back into your life, saving you from a demon who almost tore you apart. There and then, your eyes met, bringing back all of those buried memories in the back of his mind. You would swear that there was a tear that escaped his eyes if you weren't already crying at that time.

❥ And that encounter somehow changed Kaigaku. He became your friend once again, and eventually your relationship deepened. But still, a part of him was mad at himself and the world because he had let you go before. He was also afraid that you might drift away before he could ever lay his hands on you.

❥ You became so frail that he could notice how your breathing went uneven even if you weren't near him. Back when both of you were children, you would steal a bite from his apple. But now, you even don't have the appetite to do so.

❥ Kaigaku's very vocal when he's mad and frustrated. And he often does whenever you shut him away because of your headaches. Sometimes you just don't want him to see how weak you are right now, feeling scared that he might call you pathetic like he does with other people.

❥ But then, beneath that bitter facade, Kaigaku loves you so much. He'll do anything for you, even if it means that he has to make a deal with the devil just to have you by his side.

❥ You never approve of some of the bad things that he tends to do. But in the back of your mind, you might think that maybe the world just broke this man. So, you did your best to stay there and make him feel that he could be better. And yes, Kaigaku would never admit it, but he somehow feels better when he is with you.

❥ A few more months into your relationship, Kaigaku would bring you kimonos after his missions, saying that those fit you well. But the man's quite crazy sometimes and says that perhaps you'll look better without them, which will eventually make you blush.

❥ Despite his harshness, he never hurt you. There are small fights, but it's all because he just wants to be the best for you but is still having a hard time doing so. But even if these frustrations make him feel the worst, you make sure to appease him by giving him the validation that he needs. He may be bad at times, but you love him so much and believe that the Kaigaku you knew before is still there inside of him.

❥ He loves you. He tries to change for you. One day, you even saw him help a little boy who fell on the floor while playing. A blush formed on your cheek as hope crawled back into your heart. "Maybe Kaigaku is really changing?"

❥ And the days that followed were filled with him lending a hand to those in need. Even though you're shaking from the pain in your head, Kaigaku has no idea that you're watching him and admiring his efforts.

❥ When he returns, you always welcome him with open arms and a passionate kiss. Telling him you're happy for him without being completely honest about your knowledge of his recent good behaviour.

❥ Kaigaku will eventually blush and kiss you back. Finally telling you how much he loves you. And you would always tell him how much you loved him too, perhaps more than he could imagine.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚, 𝒘𝒆'𝒓𝒆 𝒅𝒐𝒏𝒆!

I wish that you all will love this headcanon~

Honestly, I had a bit of hard time writing for Kaigaku as he made me feel so bad in the anime T_T But eventually, I thought like... what if I give him this sad backstory that isn't included in the KNY universe? Like what if the OC was the reason why he became that way? XD

And there, the magic took ahold of my senses and poof! We have a Kaigaku headcanon XD I enjoyed it HAHAHA!

With Obanai and Genya, I was blushing HAHA That little tension with Mitsuri XD AAAAAH I need to write it sorry HAHA And Genya's blushing! I want it now!!

Anyways, thank you for reading this again! I hope you like it! Feel free to comment and reblog UwU

Also, requests are still open! Keep them coming as I will definitely read 'em! And of course, write XD

Arigato minna-san!

~𝓒𝓱𝓲𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓾-𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓷🌸

[angelismmm]

pairings. blade x gn!reader

synopsis. nsfw alphabet w blade gg ez, a-n only becuz im l-l-lazy....

a - aftercare (what are they like after the deed?)

blud lowkey don't give a shit about you if you aren't that close, lmao

but if you are, probably kind of clingy, and really caring. a lot of cuddling, don't tell me i'm wrong cuz i'm NOT.

in some cases, and instances, those.. 'activities' you both have do make him quite exhausted, and most of the time it really just ends with him showering you, cleaning you up, and just being in his embrace (more utc.)

b - body part (their fave body part, of themselves, and their partner's!)

probably for himself; would be his hands. just in general, plus he knows how well they treat you anyway! so why wouldn't it be his favorite? and for you, probably loves everything, doesn't know what he'd do without it, can't decide on one sole favorite, maybe your stomach and probably your neck!

c - cum (cum, anything to do with it)

will cum on your face, if not, he'll come inside, nothing in between.

i dont know how to elaborate here but um, the way his cum be sprayed all over ur face is just so mmmm to him. makes him hard all over again!

d - dirty secret (self explanatory)

not rly dirty, but wants to see you get a necklace with his name on it, or a collar with his name on it, and while he pounds so recklessly, he wants to see that pretty little pendant of his bouncing up and down on your neck, very fond of the idea, but never would actually say it to you, unless you really push him enough.

e - experience (has bro done the deed before?)

maybe? not that experienced probably, but has messed around with somebody before yes!

he knows what he's doing though, don't worry. but overall probably just did it once or twice, barely can call it sex

he probably read about sex before doing it with you, cause he wanted it to go perfectly.

f - favorite position (self explanatory pt2)

just as long as he can see your face, missionary, cowgirl, let it be anything, just as long as he can see how your face just gets so corrupted because of his big cock.

g - goofy (is bro serious about sex?)

very serious, it's almost funny, but it isn't, he's dedicated, and will show it.

but maybe when you both get closer, and are able to be more intimate with each other, in relationship wise, and etc., sure he'll laugh once or twice about a mistake he's done.

h - hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

um, yes and no?? i don't really know, i can't rly tell, like maybe thrice a week sure, and the rest of the week he don't really care, it gets messy when you both fuck anyways. and yes, black hair, thats it, idk how to elaborate ab this LMAO

i - intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

gets too embarassed. no he will not show his blushing face, even if he's already inside, probably takes like, a round or two before he does

kind of like, he'd giggle about it and go okay bae

but also would be the kind of guy to go, "i want to be the only man, the only person, in this whole galaxy, this whole universe, to make you feel like this."

j - jack off (master bait :D)

yes, very often, no other choice, i cant say otherwise. likes to imagine its you on that monster ahh cock instead of his hand, be real, he the type to do that. uses imagination wisely, and does it when you're away from him, on a mission, or whatever, needs you 24/7 tho

k - kink/s

degrading you like it's his life's purpose. loves you like it's the calm life he's been looking for since forever, but will degrade you, calls you slut, whore, made for his cock, and all that jazz.

oh but facesitting; super big fan, wants to just be in you, tongue up in your hole, while he just strokes his cock, just needs you to sit on his face so bad

be so fucking honest w me, he probably turned on by the idea of getting pegged, or getting anal. won't admit it out loud, but he wants to get treated like a prince. like just wants you to make him feel so good, that's it.

l - location

doesn't give a fuck if other people hear, will fuck you in an alleyway if he feels like it, or if you feel like it, in the public bathroom <3 but just way prefers being in bed with you, feels more romantic, and gives off more feeling to the moment, in his own opinion, will do whatever you're comfortable with.

n - no no

roleplay, anything related to it, it seriously grosses him out

non con, in general, he's disgusted by it, i know that for a fact.

don't degrade him please, he's heard, and been called all kinds of names before, and it's not like he ever liked them.

don't hurt him, it's clear in his skill he does hurt himself in the process</3, im sure he seriously just wants to love you, and wants it back, his degrading is to a small extent, and it's just in the heat of the moment thing!

[mykingdomforapen]

LC's Link Click fic shout-outs

I worry I'm going to come off as nagging but I do feel strongly about it. Link Click has some INCREDIBLE fic, written by people who put a lot of time and energy and effort into writing, but they don't always get a ton of reader interaction. I feel like I often find a fic I enjoy, scroll down to comment, and find I'm maybe one of 2 or 3 people to comment on it.

Link Click is technically not a small fandom--on the contrary, it's so incredibly active! But it seems that unless a fic was published in the s1 era or happens to get lucky, this is the norm. Which strikes me as sad, because the fandom is popping and active on other platforms.

So here are a handful of fics (by no means exhaustive) of fics that I've thoroughly enjoyed that I had scrolled down and went, They deserve so much love! (again, not exhaustive!)

liminal by Anonymous

Qiao Ling and Lu Guang talk. Much is left unsaid.

It's such a subtle fic, but so effective in showing Lu Guang's emotions, Qiao Ling's worry, and the nature of their relationship in conjunction to Cheng Xiaoshi. It's truly just so soft and nice.

stain by HeavenlyDusk

The only way for Cheng Xiaoshi to be dead is for Qiao Ling to have died first.

I just love a Qiao Ling confronts Lu Guang about Cheng Xiaoshi's death fic, and this one really captures big sister Qiao Ling and how much she cares about both of her boys. I love it!

resolve and reverberations by macrauchenia

Lu Guang rarely fumbles, rarely cracks, and rarely steps up to the sparring mat first. Nevertheless, on a random day in the middle of September, he does all three. Alternatively, Qiao Ling and Cheng Xiaoshi can't figure out why their best friend seems so *wrong* for no explicable reason.

A slice of life fic that adds such a delicious sprinkle of angst at Lu Guang's expense hehe. But it makes me feel so sad for Lu Guang, who just is so traumatized of losing Cheng Xiaoshi, and then it gives him a soft encouragement at the end. It's so sweet.

Instinct (Part One) by JordannaMorgan

Hired to solve a wealthy client’s personal mystery, Cheng Xiaoshi and Lu Guang discover there are even darker powers in the world than they realized… and the damage left in the fallout will not be easily fixed for anyone.

Man, this fic is so CREATIVE. It is great at suspense, kept me on the edge of my seat from chapter to chapter, and the Cheng Xiaoshi angst is so delicious. And then the ENDING. gahhh, I cannot wait for Part Two and really hope that it will come!! I think about this fic so often

A Day Like Any Other by rane_ne

After three long years, for the very first time ever, Lu Guang finally gets to turn 20.

It's just ... gahhhh. Cheng Xiaoshi is my blorbo, yes, but Lu Guang being so relieved and emotional at the end because he's finally done it, and is turning another year older because he no longer has to dive back because his friend is alive??? GAHHHHH

Memoriam by JordannaMorgan

Even for those who have no powers, photographs are powerful things.

This is a lovely case fic that is so thoughtfully, emotionally, and tenderly told. I love the compassion that the story has for the characters, and it gives me the feelings that the Earthquake arc concluded with--finding joy and kindness even within the tragedy. I really love it.

sept, oct by Toothpaste_Fresh

The first time around, there are no rules, and Lu Guang and Cheng Xiaoshi must learn all of their lessons the hard way. The first time around, Cheng Xiaoshi is the seventh of Liu Min’s victims. The second time around, there will be no seventh victim.

Gosh, this fic is so goooood. I love the speculation of what the first time round was like, and GOSH it's just such a gut punch of dramatic irony, of both CXS and LG being bold and idealistic and naive, and then how it tragically leads to CXS' death. It's EXCELLENT.

Golden Hour by StuckIn_aTimeLoop

The salty breeze feels nice. Cheng Xiaoshi smiles as he kneels down in the sand, happy they managed to make it in time for golden hour. Cheng Xiaoshi holds up the camera to capture his shot.

I LOVE ME SOME PARALLEL SCENES THAT ARE CONNECTED AND INTERTWINED BY AN EMOTIONAL MOTIF!! The juxtaposition of two types of golden hours is done so well, and both are so full of energy of opposite kinds in such a well balanced way. I was so excited when I heard this fic was being written and I was so happy reading it.

the shine in your eyes reminded me of the moon by StuckIn_aTimeloop

Cheng Xiaoshi was barely a child when his parents died. The king took him in, raised him as his own. Now he's older, it is time for him to choose his own knight.

Prince Cheng Xiaoshi and Knight Lu Guang. Need I say more??? It's so indulgent and I love it.

[ninakoll]

some of you might remember the court case led by the human rights centre in my country from december - long story short, my wife along with 4 other protesters were arrested at a demonstration in solidarity with Palestine for the phrase "from the river to the sea." it is a peaceful call for an end to the ongoing occupation, but the cops decided it was a call for violence. court is expensive and the case unfortunately is not over yet.

❣️ here is a link to the estonian human rights centre and their fundraisers!! ❣️ they also are currently helping a refugee trans woman reunite with her partner who is seeking asylum from estonia (the country rejected granting her asylum initially bc they're not married, ignoring the fact gay marriage isn't even possible in russia), so any kind of donation or share would be of a lot of help to the organization and everyone they support.

to personally help out, i'm offering pay-what-you-want commissions for the time being; 🩹 so if you donate at the link (after choosing the sum you can skip the isikukood part, it's for estonian residents id number to get tax reduction!) just let me know. visa/mastercard works, as well as basic EE banks of course!

you can just send me a screenshot that you've donated and let me know how much - anything above 2 EUR - and write to me what/who you'd like me to draw. if you donate over 10 dollars/euros i'll do something fancyful best to my abilities and try to match the amount donated..!!! you can send me a screenshot here thru tumblr or over email: katarina.skott@gmail.com. and please don't hesitate to ask if you're unsure about anything.

👇👇👇 more details on the case so far below!! 👇👇👇

the lowest court level ended up rejecting the protesters' plead of not guilty after extensive hearings, so the organization is taking the case a step further, to the highest court in estonia. what's more hopeful about the case this time around is that it's the supreme court of estonia and they hold legitimate power to change the laws! which would mean, if they look at this case they would hopefully ultimately end up changing the laws concerning freedom of speech, as currently it is a very messily worded law that basically gives the police too much freedom to arrest people, based completely on personal judgment and held biases. dangerous police state stuff. the supreme court is also more likely to handle this case professionally as the previous court level mostly handles divorce + work disputes...

personally... let me tell you, it's so difficult to watch court hearings where everyone is deliberately obtuse and bullying your wife relentlessly about pointless shit like geography and telling them snidely to try slogans like "I'M WORRIED" at protests in the future instead, as to not stir trouble lol. dude, children are dying out there. acab. i'm also very haunted by the casual racism on such a high state level. it's been a whirlwind of exhaustion all while trying our best to stay active and fight for palestinians rights to just exist as well. sooo fucked up our country is like this. trying my best to stay hopeful about the future. immensely grateful to the human rights centre for their love and support through it all and the important work they do every day.

thanks for reading this long text, my inbox is open if you have any questions! thank you all so much for the support!! ;_;

[itssunshinetoday]

𝖲𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗍 𝗆𝖾𝗅𝗈𝖽𝗒 | 𝖬𝗂𝗇 𝖸𝗈𝗈𝗇𝗀i

pairing: dad!Yoongi × f!reader

genre: romance

warnings : pure fluff, too much sweetness, protagonist's daughter was sick, mention of puking, a little bit of coffee addiction, SO SO SWEET.

synopsis: your daughter was sick, and you and your husband are worried, but you woke up to a sweet surprise.

a/n: Hii,this is my first time publishing something here. English is not my native language, so please forgive me for any mistakes and don't esiste to tell me what's wrong! I just wrote what was on my mind.Enjoy≽^•⩊•^≼

a/n 2 : Hope you liked it! Let me know if you have some requests!

✩｡:*•.───── ❁ ❁ ─────.•*:｡✩

You wake up next to your husband, still exhausted from the night before. Your daughter puked all day, and, clearly worried, you had a restless sleep. It was around 6.00 a.m. and your hand automatically came out of the sheets to cover your eyes from the sun. Someone murmured beside you, and you understood that your husband was awake as well.

"You're already awake? I had a fitful night, and I'm sure you had it too, honey."

The cold atmosphere of December made you shiver, and Yoongi suddenly hugged you tightly as he spoke gently to you, concerned about your sleep and with his mind full of thoughts for your daughter.

"Choon-Hee must be in dreamland now, I hope she had a better sleep than us. She was feeling better, isn't she?"

You nodded slightly, inhaling the sweet scent of your husband's skin and caressing his long hair to reassure him.

"She stopped puking, at least...I really hope she's feeling better now"

You sighed, now thinking about your lovely daughter and how you hated to see her in such a state. Her usually bright voice, yesterday was like a whisper, and her glowing eyes hadn't the same spark. She was usually a cheerful child, and seeing her twisted from the pain made you so concerned. Around 9 p.m. she started to feel better, she had stopped vomiting.

But your lovely daughter was really tired and you hoped that today she'd feel better.

"Let's go check on her and then go downstairs. I need coffee to go through the day"

You wouldn't say that you were addicted to caffeine, but it was like a necessity for you to stay active, especially after that horrible night, and your husband was as addicted as you. He jumped out of the bed at the thought of the sour taste of coffee.

And so, hand in hand, you came out from under the sheets, immediately noticing how cold it was outside of them.

You two slowly approached your daughter’s room and with a gentle step Yoongi approached Choon-Hee, touching her forehead to control her temperature. Immediately, her little hand moved and her sweet eyes opened slowly.

"Honey, how are you feeling?" It was Yoongi who, visibly worried, asked her that question even though your daughter was still half asleep, but when she hinted a smile, your hearts warmed.

"I feel better Dad. I want to have breakfast with you, I promise not to throw up anymore"

You put a hand on Yoongi’s back, which at the time was lowered, to fill your daughter’s face with kisses.

"Come on, let’s have breakfast together"

You breathed a sigh of relief when you saw your daughter in that condition, she really seemed fine and you hoped that she had healed for good.

As soon as you arrived in the kitchen, your daughter didn’t even give time to sit down. She immediately asked to play with Dad’s instruments.

Your husband was a producer, very famous and above all, very good. He called himself "genius" and that’s exactly how he won you over, one of his many qualities was to get you emotional with his music, and your daughter wanted to compose a song just like her dad.

"Do you want to do like your dad mh? Do you already have this passion?"

He asked her and she immediately sat on his legs, while he fixed the instruments in front of him and with a proud look, he approached your daughter’s little fingers "they are all yours, let me see what you can do"

And while you were making breakfast, glancing from time to time to observe your daughter, who with her frowning eyebrows composed her first melody, your husband’s words melted you in the blink of an eye.

"Our girl is a genius"

Even though he knew that he was the genius among you, he would make her happy just to see her smile.Proud of her melody, Choon-Hee rose quickly from her father’s lap to dive into the sofa, exclaiming loudly "the life of a producer is really tiring"

That comment made you laugh, but you tried in every way to hide your laughter and felt your husband’s arms tighten you from behind.

"Was the melody that good?"

You asked quietly, preparing the much desired coffee.

"You know, I think I could use this tune for my next song"

You both laughed, enjoying that wonderful day, which fortunately had started in the best way.

After all, with your husband and daughter by your side, every day started off just right.

[wyldblunt]

Hi, it is 6 AM here and I have to sleep but I'm writing to you to let you know that I'm very concerned about what I've been reading in the past day.

I heard of the gwg/Logan incident on the day of it happening, but that's not really what I'm worried about. What concerns me is what seems like a consistent & long term systematic marginalization of POC in GW2 fan spaces. To be honest I'm not that surprised, I've had my suspicions since 2020.

I'm not active on GW2 tumblr or any social media at all, other than posting the Tyria Pride announcements once a year, so I don't have much impact outside of the Tyria Pride discord, but I still want to do something. I have some ideas, and am also always open to suggestions.

I would love to chat at some point (it doesn't have to be now, and I totally get it if you're not interested). The Tyria Pride discord isn't huge but it isn't small either, and maybe I have some influence that I can use for good.

Lelling

Tyria Pride Lead

P.S.: I know this can be a source of exhaustion so please do not worry about tone policing yourself or rewording your reply for ages to be "just right", if you do reply to me. (I just spent an hour doing that so I get it, it is now 7 AM). I'm on your side. I'll meet you where you're at.

hey — i hope you don't mind that i'm posting this publicly, but i want to because waking up to this message was a huge relief to me. and as i've tried to explain in other conversations about this, i KNOW there are LOTS of people who have been really uncomfortable through this entire convo but have not felt willing or able to speak up publicly (bc of open threats of ostracization for "being mean" AND observed behavior towards those of us who have said anything) and i hope that reading this will be a relief to them too.

thank you not only for reaching out but also for GETTING what our actual concerns are, bc one of my biggest frustrations through all of this has been people repeatedly twisting the issue so they can dismiss it as squabbling about fiction and then they don't actually have to address the broader patterns we're talking about here; thank you for the assurance that i won't be tone policed, because that's been repeatedly used against us as well ("okay i guess you guys are making some good points but you're being so ANGRY"); and thank you for acknowledging how tiring this is, because i've been made to feel like if i don't keep showing up and being vocal about this, leaving behind mostly the white allies who have been sticking up for us and using their privilege to make corrections and take some of the brunt of the ridicule and backlash, the whole thing will be dismissed as a non-issue anyway. and frankly i don't fucking want to anymore! i'm tired lol!

but i also wanted to springboard off this really kind and reassuring message from you to say it isn't the only one i've received, and that as angry and exhausted as i am, i want to highlight and acknowledge that i have NOT been alone in this. people have been checking in on me, listening to what i and others have to say about it and boosting our statements, changing their minds if they jumped to conclusions earlier, and offering private support and conversation among those of us who still don't feel comfortable braving the environment out here on tumblr — obviously the bad experiences i've had through this are sticking in my head and are really demoralizing, but honestly in terms of quantity and quality i have had MORE experiences of people supporting me and making sure i'm okay. this fandom has massive problems but it also has more of a solid, positive core than i was willing to hope for in the beginning.

i spoke up initially because it was horrible how isolated i felt when this all kicked off; the wider problem is absolutely not fixed, but i can confidently say i don't feel alone or abandoned anymore, and that gives me a ton of hope for figuring this out.

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

Hi? Gosh how do I even start with this :'D

I know it's been ages since I've last popped up on here. I've been debating when to post this for a while, but I kept adding to my draft more and more and now it's the end of JULY omgg I felt so guilty disappearing with zero updates but then thought my birthday would be the best day to finally address this considering it'll feel less random? idk but Ive always celebrated my bday with you guys and I'd feel so bad answering your kind asks without me at least explaining why I was gone for months.

Truth be told, I was dealing with a lot of stuff irl. health issues and sudden declining grades that left me stumped and drained for months now- along with technical issues like having to replace some parts of my computer that took a while for me to find to even draw digitally, which I didn't have the time for anyway with how tired and weary I felt every day.

I'm frankly shaken up by a lot of shit rn and I don't know how to be active online with this burden on my chest- Especially as it's been a while since I've even looked at utmv related content and my motivation dwindled. I swear I'd hype myself up to post or reblog something- but I'd see just how much I've missed or the overwhelming amount of posts I'd need to go through and I'd feel so swamped with exhaustion and most importantly guilt, for not clearing the air up sooner to reassure you guys that I'm, y'know, alive, and not dead in a ditch somewhere. And I'd procrastinate cause typing it all out is hard and I'd give up halfway every time and it's just not fair to you all!

I thought I was handling it well when I started going out and socializing more, instead of staying cooped up at home on my computer all day. and in the first draft of this post I made months ago I was gonna detail some of the fun plans I had, for my life and for this blog :D but relaxing my strict study schedule and letting go a bit of my tight routine, thinking it was better than wringing myself dry to keep it up, backfired horribly, to say the least.

I know right?? so silly to be hung up on stupid shit like studies of all things! but this is a very important thing for me considering my career plans and the competitivity encouraged by everyone I'm surrounded by, the pressure of keeping up adding to my already stressful days. I had to fix myself up first and I couldn't handle the strain nor interact with people and thinking of jobs and exams sapped my energy so much it's frankly embarrassing. writing this feels so cheesy too and it frustrates me to know I could've come back a month earlier if it weren't for that, but I also know putting all of this into words then would just sound like incoherent venting (not that this is very different tbf) and I wasn't in the right headspace to address my absence, or anything really- I didn't want everyone to see me return when I couldn't muster up a genuinely positive message, let alone talk to anyone with a shadow of my usual cheer

I feel like a complete mess and It drives me up the wall how depressed I've gotten. I debated deleting this blog so many times 'cause the fear of disappointing my audience and my friends, for lack of a more fitting sentiment, made me feel even shittier. I'm constantly thinking if this wall of text is worth posting, or if it's better not to burden you all with all my sappy troubles as if it's the end of the world. Trust me, I'll be fine. I'm not trying to dramatize this situation, but I don't think I'm up to pretending I'm all sunshine and enthusiasm you're all accustomed to.

So sorry for worrying you all! I'll try to catch up, deliver some missed birthday gifts, and answer some asks while I'm at it! Again, I can't state how much I appreciate your support throughout the years. It's frankly a miracle I kept any of you around with how much I keep popping and leaving at random with no warning. I definitely can't promise for my stay to be without a hitch, and if you don't mind an inconsistent schedule you're free to stay of course, but I'm afraid I can't sustain the pace I had when I first started this blog. I'll keep posting art, but lower my activity in the fandom sphere to reduce the strain on my mental health. so fewer rants and walls of text, more art, and less stress overall. Love you all and thanks for waiting for this long <3

[nitewrighter]

I love your take on how Peter Parker would mesh into the DC Universe, especially as the guy that the Forever People and New Gods gravitate towards. When it comes to Spidey getting tossed into cosmic level threats, such as the original '84 Secret Wars miniseries, he's usually the designated "guy everybody underestimates" because even though Peter is a street-level hero by choice, he can punch SIGNIFICANTLY above his weight class. Like taking on "They can smack The Hulk around" heavyweights. Not only that, but he's a scientific genius who can rub shoulders with the likes of Tony Stark and Reed Richards, in spite of being this dorky, wisecracking wallcrawler.

His whole thing is that when he's around other heroes, because Peter is so secretive about his secret identity, others tend to make wild assumptions about him that Peter never bothers to correct them about, because he is just that short of being Batman-levels of paranoid about his secret identity being uncovered and having it or his loved ones used against him. He's ALSO the one who believes the best in everybody, regardless of what they might think of themselves. He holds his peers to a certain standard, so when they betray that standard, and betray their fellow heroes, THAT'S when Peter gets pissed, and you have moments where he solos like... the ENTIRE X-Men team or something to that effect.

It's why Wolverine, despite being an extraordinarily violent individual, considers Spidey a friend, because Peter genuinely believes that Logan can be so much better than he believes himself to be.

He's like this hodgepodge of Billy Batson, Dick Grayson, Jimmy Olsen, and Bruce Wayne all rolled into one wisecracking package.

I think it also helps that Spider-Man very easily slips into the role of someone who speaks out on behalf of those who are marginalized because, at his roots, he's from a very economically unstable background--he's usually having to negotiate his superheroism with a job that barely keeps a roof over his head, and I think one of the things that makes Spider-Man such a beloved and relatable characters is that, his connection to the world of superheroes doesn't actually protect him from the very mundane, everyday threats of existing in capitalism. He has to worry about keeping a roof over his head, he has to worry about keeping a roof over Aunt May's head, he has to hold MJ's hand while she sobs over community theater programs for local kids get shut down or how she didn't get that callback because even though she's immensely talented she, quote, 'doesn't have the right look.' So he's also this natural advocate of people who get passed over by life in ways all these Marvel heavy hitters don't even think of.

Captain America: Why didn't [Villain of the week] just do [very obvious Lawful Good solution]?

Spider-Man: Because No Child Left Behind shut down 5 different schools in his area, he's in a food desert, a drug arrest for a drug that is now legal is still on his record and actively affecting his hiring prospects, and during the decades you were on ice lawmakers have been steadily killing all the local and federal support programs and antitrust laws you enjoyed in the 40's.

Captain America: Ah. Yeah. That'll do it.

So I think the Forever People (and by extension, the Hairies), being kind of a love letter to counterculture themselves, would be a great team-up for Spidey. Again because they're technically aliens and lack a lot of Earth context, everything about our planet is amazing and new and groovy to them! I think it would be a good blend of characterization, again, with a Spider-Man who's definitely getting severely burnt out and struggling with the sustainability of being Spider-Man and existing as Peter Parker.

Jack Kirby's notes on the Hairies also definitely overlaps with his philosophies on the Forever People, so I'm definitely putting this in here:

Kirby is literally so passionate and insane. But I love the idea of a very exhausted and jaded Spider-Man putting it on himself to be a guide and protector for a polycule of mind-blowingly optimistic space-hippies and somehow healing in the process.

(This is the vision) (Also maybe Spidey gets to get fused into Infinity-Man with all of them at some point. Infini-Spidey. Working name.)

[andhumanslovedstories]

I’m looking for a second career after working corporate. I’d like something away from a computer, workin with people, in demand, and more flexible. I do have some autistic traits though (one therapist floated it but never officially diagnosed). Do you think nursing would be a bad choice?

Here's a useless answer: it depends! I'll also give my usual caveat that nursing is a very broad field and a school nurse versus a dialysis nurse versus an ICU nurse versus a home health nurse vs a community health nurse are all going to have different experiences. You'll probably spend more time at a computer than you might like (documenting......), but if you get efficient at it, you can blast through it alright. Except when you can't.

And you will work with people! In any part of nursing, you'll be working with people, often in intimate and vulnerable ways. You meet a lot of cool people and get to be there for a lot of cool moments, cool and funny and profound moments. Working with people when they aren't at their best can be exhausting. Working with people when they aren't at their best and also you're understaffed and also someone is complaining of new onset chest pain at the same time someone else is calling to be cleaned up because they've been incontinent--it's really easy to exhaust yourself out of compassion. You have to care and actively engage with people's often tragic situations, but you also have to protect yourself from secondhand trauma. It's okay if this is not something you're comfortable or good with, but if so, you should probably think critically about whether nursing is for you.

And flexible--maybe??? Again, different jobs will have different perks. A lot of nurses work prn which means they have to pick up a certain number of shifts a month, but they aren't on the schedule normally. You just pick up as you want. Very flexible! But also a lot of these nurses are getting their healthcare elsewhere, usually a partner. Like any shift work, you can always swap shifts with a coworker if you can find one who'll do it. When I worked in home health, it was very hard to adjust my schedule because there wasn't necessarily another nurse that could fill in. And often units in the hospital will have various schedule stipulations--work every other weekend, work a certain amount of holidays, work night shift until you get the seniority to go to days or become a nocturnal little freak (me). I currently work in float pool, which makes it way easier to call out and adjust schedules because I'm not assigned anywhere specific until like ten minutes before the shift starts.

And with regards to the last bit, the autistic traits, I don't know exactly which ones you mean, but none of them are an inherent obstacle to being a nurse. We need neurodiversity in nursing. Some patients might find you cold or awkward or weird or whatever way you worry you might come across. Other patients will resonate with those exact same traits. No one's the perfect nurse for all people. Some people want to that extra care, some people want competent work and then to have space for themselves, some patients want to learn everything about their situation, some patients don't even want to know what pills they're taking. Think of yourself as a specialty nurse. An oncology nurse can take care of a variety of patients, but they're most well suited and situated to take care of cancer patients. There's a patient type that is a perfect fit for you. And the same way cardiac nurses deal with strokes, and orthopedic nurses deal with respiratory infections, you work competently outside your specialty because you have a good base for your practice, but you also know that you have specialties that you are uniquely equipped to handle. Specialties like cheerleading through physical therapy, calming down dementia patients, knowing the shit out of telemetry, making sure patients get a bed bath and clean sheets, using a machine to pump a patient's blood outside your body--whatever you most like, you're most good at, what gives you energy to work. I think mine are working well with "difficult" patients, managing pain, and stealing cranberry juice from the patient fridge. for me.

I'll say too if you're worried like a lack of empathy or easy understanding of other people will be an impediment to care--I'm not saying I'm autistic, but I don't think I'm particularly empathetic. I NEVER know what people are thinking or feeling. I struggle to tell when patients are like "talk to me more!" versus "I am being polite to you, but please leave." I have never once been comforting a crying person and thought, "I am NAILING this. I am making them feel better." But I don't think I'm a bad nurse. I reverse engineer empathy by finding a situation that I was in that's similar to the situation a patient is in, and I think about what I would have wanted and appreciated in that situation. I think about what evidence says is a good thing to do in this situation. I think about what experience tells me has worked in this situation in the pas. I also just ask patients what they're feeling and what they want and why they do what they do instead of assuming I know. (That last one is so choice, we should all do it more.)

The job puts you in a lot of Situations that are hard for anyone to manage. So you can study up for a lot of Situations. I read conflict resolution books and writing by sick people, I think about how adherent I am to my own treatment plan when I get judgy, I ask patients a lot of questions in part so I can understand them but also so I can understand the next patient like them, I practice difficult conversations I can predict before I go into rooms, and I make sure I have certain phrases and reactions in my back pocket in case I'm caught by surprise. I've figured out my safe topics of conversations that I can chat about with patients that are personable but not intimate (cats, how long you've been in the area, how hard it is to sleep in the hospital at night). I periodically try out new conversation styles and topics to see how those work. I find people I admire and I try consciously to emulate them.

I make a shitload of rules too that help me structure my behavior so I can act like a person I'm proud of. If I can't get something for a patient, I have to go back and tell them that instead of just never returning to the room. Whenever I leave a room, before I go, I make sure the call light is within reach and I ask if there's anything I can do before I go. If someone is sad, ask if they want hot chocolate, and if they say yes, ask if they want it with hot water or milk. If I have a patient that is very chatty and always on the call light, allot conversation time with them like I'm scheduling wound care in case they're lonely. Whenever I tell a patient that they can't do something, I explain the clinical reasoning for that. If the only reason I can think of to tell a patient why they can't do something except "it's against hospital rules", I reconsider the refusal. I've got so many rules and guidelines I've developed for myself so I can best act in a way that I think a good nurse should act.

(usual disclaimer that this does not mean I always accomplish this or that I always behave in a way I'm proud of. but I do think developing these rules and following them makes behaving like I want to more habitual.)

All this to say--I care tremendously about my patients when they're my patients, but I don't take most of them home with me. I feel often feel very distant from the emotions of the situation. I used to feel like I was watching the world through glass. Now I still feel like that, but not in a bad way. I don't get mad when patients yell at me. I can view their problems as quests to solve. I'm engaged but I'm not flustered by distress.

look alllllllllllllllllll that to say is have you considered making nursing a special interest? works for me. oh and YEAH. The job security is AMAZING. It's such a weight off my mind to know that if I don't like my current job, it's so easy to get another somewhere else.

[animeloverskylarmoon]

Yumichika Ayasegawa (Bleach)- Oneshot

You weren't certain how it happened.

Truly.

Ichigo warned you that he had some crazy friends. Usually you just pretended that they weren't there. With two jobs, you really didn't have the energy to be worrying about crazies in old fashioned robes.

That's why you tried your best to get rid of him. But he just kept coming back.

Like a parasite.

"If you'd like I can give you some tips. Your hair is a mess."

An irk mark appeared on your forehead at the few of many insults that this annoying reaper had directed at you.

"IF I'M SUCH A MESS YOU COULD JUST STOP COMING YOU CRAZY REAPER!!"

Screaming in the middle of the street at a man only you could see probably wasn't doing you any favors. You huff, storming off.

"I'm just trying to help."

He jumped down from his once elevated position, landing right beside you as he walked in step.

"Why are you here anyway? Aren't you reapers supposed to be guards or something? You're pretty casual for someone on a mission." You grumble.

"Things have quieted down since the war. Our head captain just wants to make sure it stays that way."

You nod.

The war.

It's crazy how casual they always speak about those things. While you could see spirits, your fighting ability wasn't anything to brag about. Surely not to be of any use in a war. A part of you felt it. When the war started. You hadn't seen Yumichika or Ikkaku for a while. When they finally popped up to freeload in your home, you acted pissed, but truthfully you were relieved. Because you knew lives were lost.

"Is it scary, fighting all the time?"

That question was presented a bit quietly and Yumichika glanced at you. He could see your hesitance to even propose the question. Sometimes he needed to remind himself that you weren't a fighter like them.

"War is war. Fear is just a reaction to the unknown. I'm not sure if there's a word I can use to truly describe it."

The very serious response was not what you expected.

"However beautiful beings like me don't have to worry about such things."

He then persisted to pose in which you just walked away.

"Hey wait up!!"

Yep, that's how a lot of your encounters went. As agitating as he was at times, you enjoyed his company. You also appreciated him checking in on you every now and then.

"Geez, I'm exhausted."

You dropped onto the couch, not even kicking off your shoes. Yumichika smiled.

"Did you overdo it today? Your wrinkles seem more visible than usual."

"Don't make me end you."

Yumichika laughed nervously at the threat, and you just sighed, lifting your hand as you stared at it.

"Things like beauty, it isn't made for people like me. Just the thought of all that cutesy stuff is exhausting."

Although you say that, you haven't completely banished the prospect of dressing up and going on dates. It was just hard. Most guys wanted a girl to dress up and act a certain way. You did like dressing up every once in a while, but you couldn't see yourself changing your entire wardrobe just to appeal to a guy. You liked baggy clothes and cool sneakers.

Yumichika's eyes are trained on your form.

"Is there a human that you're interested in that you would be willing to do that for?"

You fully expect him to be wearing some kind of mocking expression or follow that up with another poke at your attire, but when you move your hand, that's not what you read at all. Your cheeks tint red at how intensely he's looking at you. It's not often that he's stoic.

You jump upright, bashful.

"What the hell are you talking about! A-As if I would be!"

You don't know why you're getting so defensive. It's not like he accused you of anything. You rise, heading for the kitchen.

"I-I'm going to make food!!"

Marching off stiffly, Yumichika watches you with a small smile.

He'll admit that your meeting wasn't exactly under the best circumstances.

He'd been in Karakura to help up with the increase of hollow activity. 

Back when Aizen was still gathering his army. Ikkaku and Matsumoto had taken one section and he'd planned to cover the next.

"Yumichika!"

Ichigo's call pulled his focus and he was stunned to see Ichigo carrying a woman in his arms.

"She's hurt, I need you to get her back to Urahara-san."

Yumichika didn't need much more instruction. From the worried look, this was clearly someone Ichigo knew. He handed you over, but your hand gripped Ichigo's robes and they both froze.

"I-Ichigo.."

For a moment they both took notice of the fear in your eyes. Ichigo offered the best smile he could muster.

"I'll be fine."

You were hesitant, but you finally released him. He gave one last reassuring look before he disappeared. Yumichika didn't waste any time. He took off himself, glancing down to ensure you were still conscious. Your eyes seemed distant. Your body was covered in bruises. What he could assume was a hollow attack.

"Please..promise me that you'll look after Ichigo. H-He's all I have left.."

Your words were solemn, and Yumichika was the last one to make such a promise. But watching you so helpless, it did something to him.

"I have his back."

At the time, that seemed like the right thing.

It helped you.

When Yumichika got closer to you, it was mostly as a source of entertainment. You were around all the time it seemed and you always had the best reactions whenever he flaunted his beauty. The more he saw you, the more he felt protective. The frequent trips to Karakura were welcomed whenever they had a mission. He was able to do his job and see you. The longer he was around, the more he learned.

Like your relationship with Ichigo.

What he initially assumed as romantic love was just a brotherly bond you'd formed when he saved you from a river as a kid. 

A detail he felt comforted that you openly told him.

"How come you always drop by just to piss me off."

You looked angry, and Yumichika had to admit it was cute. He'd never tell you, but sometimes he just loved to jab to get a reaction.

"I was merely saying you may never get to my standard of beauty, but you're still exceptional in your own way."

"Why does that sound like a compliment and an insult all wrapped in one!!" You fire back.

Yumichika laughed from his position on the roof and you just folded your arms, turning your head in the opposite direction. Nights like this were nice to just sit and watch the stars.

Considering that Yumichika could literally fly, you knew such a view wasn't anything extraordinary to him. It was still nice that he decided to entertain you.

"If I'm so beneath your level then why waste your time."

It was just an angry little ramble, but Yumichika turned. He could tell that you weren't truly upset. But he realized then that you may not actually know how he sees you.

"If I really thought you weren't worth my time I wouldn't even look at you."

The statement makes you turn, and you swallow. Because he's wearing that expression again. Soft and a bit paralyzing in a fluffy sort of way.

"I've made it a rule of mine never to look upon ugly things. What I see before me is quite beautiful."

Your eyes widen at those words. The heat crawls up your cheeks before you can stop it.

"Y-You're just messing with me again!" You point at him accusingly.

He smiles, and it does something to you. When he moves closer, he takes hold of your hand, and it lowers slowly into your lap. 

You're in awe.

"Not so feisty anymore, are you?"

The confident smile on his face is disarming. Especially with the lack of space. You clench your hand into your lap.

"W-What are you doing Yumichika.."

It's almost a whisper. It's when his hand cups your cheek that you feel your heart hammer.

"I thought I was clear, I'm claiming something very beautiful."

His lips descend on your own and you clench your eyes shut. You can't believe you let someone like Yumichika mess with you. Much less kiss you. Although you can't deny that it feels really good. His lips feel so soft, and you've never realized just how good he smells. You feel his hand shift from your lap, sliding over your waist as he pulls you closer. Your blush darkens and he deepens the kiss. At this point you're just barely able to think, much less do much but reciprocate shyly. When his tongue brushes against our own, you pull away with a gasp, covering your lips.

Yumichika licks his own lips.

"W-What was that!"

"That was a kiss, would you like another?"

"N-No you sneaky pervert!!"

In all honesty, you're not sure your brain will be able to function properly if he kisses you again. Your protests are merely to save face. 

This is embarrassing to say the least.

You don't expect it when he picks you up. Letting out a soft squeak, you grip at his robes.

"What the heck are you doing!!"

"I already told you."

He says nothing more, just flash steps into the house.

"W-Wait I'm not prepared!! K-KYA!!!"

It looks like you never had anything to worry about.

[gffa]

The thing I really miss about Star Wars novels is exemplified by being two-thirds of the way through Inquisitor: Rise of the Red Blade and how I think I'm legitimately enjoying it, but in a very specific way, and I think there's actually a ton you could dig into the structure and bias of the narrator that I think is done on purpose and that I can find sympathy for a character actively falling to the dark side and what she's going through without validating the people she's demonizing in her head because I've been there, I have had my brain lying to me all my life, telling me things I know aren't true, making me believe them despite all evidence otherwise, and do you guys KNOW how much I love hot messes of a disaster lady? I fucking love a woman who is just an awful mess and doesn't have to actually be perfect or nice and maybe just once or twice says a kind of catty thing, NO, SHE IS A WHOLE ASS MESS and I LOVE HER!! But also I'm kind of in the position of how I'm tired of getting stories of characters falling to the dark side being the vast majority of what stories explore with the Jedi, I enjoy them, but not when that's all there is, and I have spent YEARS AND YEARS going back and forth with the discussions about the Jedi and I am so tired of it, I DON'T WANT TO ANYMORE. I just want to write my commentary and thoughts down in the vein that I have them and have that be it. I want to say, "This is a really glorious unreliable narrator here, because everything she says is contradicted by what the Jedi actually say/do, and she is explicitly a character designed with neurodivergent/mental health issues aspects in mind and you can't divorce that from her character." and like I don't even want to discuss with other Jedi fans about what the author may or may not have said (I read one interview from her at the beginning, enjoyed it fine, and AM NOT INTERESTED in knowing or hearing anything further) or how annoying it is to have a book like this, I JUST WANT TO DIG INTO A STORY and not have to worry about bracing myself for combat. (And also the thorny issue of how this isn't precisely a recommendation because I'm not sure others would enjoy it, like even if you agreed with me, I'm not sure it'd be something in your wheelhouse, but I don't want to even get into that, it feels exhausting, like, just I want to talk about how I'm enjoying it, but not have to articulate why I think others possibly wouldn't, just leave it at "nah, I don't think you'd enjoy it".) I know this is some IRL stuff spilling over onto my reading of this book and I'm aware of the state of a lot of creators in SW right now hold opinions that have made me stop reading their works because I am no longer interested in anything they have to contribute, but also like. Sometimes I just want to enjoy a book on my own terms and not have to feel like I'm arguing a case, but instead reveling in the glorious hot mess of a central female character that maybe I relate to and have sympathy for even while recognizing that she is painting a very unreliable portrait within the book, because I Have Been There. Idk, I'm not saying this very well, and a lot of it is outside factors, but I have this giant tangled ball of "I just want to enjoy something for once, not examine why it might actually be doing my Blorbos all wrong", like aren't we supposed to be in fandom for the enjoyment of things, not to constantly argue with people? /tired and hasn't been sleeping well and has been thinking about this instead of wrenching irl stuff