#so if I want to find any kind of community that I can actually access on a regular basis...if I want to be part of like. an actual Group.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hey. I want to say Thanks for all the work you do here. My question is nothing biological, it's just something that spawned from a memory about my high school sex ed.

For some context, I went to a private evangelist high school in a semi-well off neighborhood in Buenos Aires. I had scholarship and some subsides that allowed me to go there as a middle class kid. So I did get Sex Ed that I can say honestly was fine.

Like, they didn't tell us to just don't have sex. we had one talk every two months from 3rd year onwards taught by a biology teacher and maybe some TA that got called in as aide if something needed to be demonstrated.

But every now and then we also has a "social sex Ed" class. Usually taught by one of the counselors. The gist was the guy coming in and telling us about interpersonal relantionships. We had a unit on like domestic violence and one on abusive relantionships from what I recall.

So my question is if that's something that exists in the Sex Ed space? Like, I'm on board with teaching teens those stuff a 100%. It's undeniable a good resource. But Idk if that's something that's standard practice or my school was just doing that

hi, thank you for sharing! I'm glad to hear that you had access to so much information :)

what's typical of sex ed varies enormously from place to place; in some places, you're lucky if the teachers are allowed to acknowledge that protected sex exists at all instead of insisting on abstinence until marriage. personally I think that sex education absolutely should include discussions about safely navigating intimate relationships, because leaving that out makes sex seem like something that happens in a void, like it has nothing to do with any other kinds of human interactions, which doesn't improve anyone's communication. a lot of people come away from sex ed with the impression that they're supposed to just Know What To Do instinctively if and when the opportunity to have partnered sex arises, which couldn't be further from the truth and can make early sexual experiences much more stressful and scary than they need to be.

most of the in-person teaching I do is with younger folks, around the aged of 10-12. and we absolutely talk about consent and boundary-setting in addition to basic mechanics of puberty and pregnancy, because that's a really important part of the equation. teaching the kids how a sperm meets an egg is useless if we don't also teach them how to decide if they personally feel ready for sexual intimacy and how to talk that through with a potential partner, as well as how to say no if they find themselves in situations where they're being pressure to do something that they don't want.

I had a conversation once with the father of one of my students - nice guy, really excited for his kiddo to receive a thorough sex education - who told me with very real regret that his high school offered very thorough details on the physical mechanics of sex and contraception but didn't offer students any guidance on how to actually navigate consent with partners. while he never experienced any pregnancy scares of STIs as a teen, he said he was sure that he was nevertheless "not a very good partner" because while he knew about using condoms, he never learned how to actually talk through his feelings with the girls he dated. it seemed really obvious, to me that, having learned a lot since his teen years, he was carrying a lot of remorse for the ways he might have unintentionally hurt his teenage girlfriends, and was eager for his own child to learn the tools to avoid falling into the same behavior.

part of the curriculum is learning to spot inappropriate behavior and potential predation and how to seek help in those scenarios. when learning about sex, especially for young people, I do think it's genuinely really important to model positive, consensual interactions so that there's a clear point of comparison against situations that are unsafe. but in my class also talk about situations where there are questions of consent but no one clearly in the wrong. what if you friend wants to try kissing and you don't know what to say? what if someone you like is getting too touchy and you want them to stop? if you have a crush on a friend but they don't reciprocate, how should you act towards them after that? all of those are important scenarios to talk about, and help the kids build their skills of conflict resolution and communication in all areas of their lives.

so, the short answer is that it's absolutely not a universal practice, but I really wish it was because it would do a tremendous amount of good.

[musical-chick-13]

The thing is, like...yeah, a lot of times, the Social Exclusion I've experienced has been from people I probably wouldn't have wanted to be friends with anyway. At the very least, if someone is willing to do that, if someone is going to be that judgmental over things that don't actually matter, then any actual friendship with them probably wouldn't last very long.

But...it still hurts. Because regardless of how you actually feel about these people, it's still another instance of somebody telling you that you're too annoying or too much or too emotional or too whatever. It's still one more thing that people don't even give you the choice to have? And if you hear this over and over again, if it happens everywhere you go, then after a certain point it gets difficult to not internalize it at least a little bit.

It's been 30 years of this and it never gets any easier.

[novella-november]

Well. I have a feeling I'm about to have a million new followers. (March 31st, 2025; not an April Fool's joke, unless Nanowrimo has very poor taste and timing)

Here's a link that explains in long video format the whole entire thing in detail:

and to sum it up:

This blog was made as an Anti-Generative AI to Nanowrimo, as well as a way to actually build a friendly, low-pressure, helpful community of aspiring writers, without the hard-fast-do-it-or-die pressure brought on by nanowrimo.

There is no official "contest" -- only a community coming together to inspire each other to write, help out with motivation by setting community goals, keeping participation motivation via Trackbear.app, etc!

The most popular writing challenge is still November for most people, but I myself have also started to keep a year-round, daily writing goal of 444 via the website 4thewords, which has been an extreme help in getting me to write a little at a time.

This year has been very hectic for everyone what with the election results so I haven't been very active on tumblr (I think everyone can understand that) but I was originally planning on also having each month of the year being a different themed writing / art challenge but got a bit distracted real life.

So, what is the Novella November Challenge?

It's a fun challenge where writers come together to write 30,000 (or your own personal writing goal!) words in 30 days, sharing tips, writing advice, plot ideas, accessibility aids, and committing to having fun while explicitly fighting back against Generative AI by using our own words and disavowing the use of scraping and generating to take away the livelyhoods of artists of all spectrums, and proving everyone who insists "generative AI is an accessibility tool" wrong by committing to our creative visions and making it easier for everyone to find the tools they need to succeed by sharing tips, free programs, and finding a like-minded community to support you! 💙

There is no official website, there is no required place to show your participation, this is a community initiative that will never be monetized by predatory sponsors or dangerous moderators abusing their power.

This blog is here to inspire everyone, regardless of experience level, to write and create the story they want to tell, in their own words, while striving to remain a fun, low-pressure challenge that doesn't turn into a stressful spiral, like often happened with Nano.

Want to start writing but not sure how? Don't have money to spend on expensive writing programs? Have no fear!

LibreOffice: An always free, open-source alternative to Microsoft Word (and Microsoft's other office suits)

4Thewords: A website (both desktop and mobile web browser) that syncs your writing cross platform to the cloud, with built-in daily word goals, streak tracking, and you can fight monsters with your word count to game-ify writing!

Trackbear: A website dedicated to tracking your writing, setting custom goals, and creating leaderboards for community participation; you can join the year-long community leaderboard with the Join Code "f043cc66-6d5d-45b2-acf1-204626a727ba" and a November-limited one will release on November 1st as well.

Want to use Text to Speech to dictate your novel?

Most modern phones have a built-in option available on your keyboard settings which can be used on any writing program on your phone, and most modern PCs that allow a microphone (including headphone) connection has some kind of native dictation function, which you can find by opening your start panel and searching your computer for "Speech to text" or "voice to text".

Want to write while on the go, but don't want to / can't use the small phone keyboard to type, or speech to text?

You can, for as cheap as $40, buy a bluetooth keyboard that you can pair with your smart phone or tablet and use to write in any and all writing applications on your phone -- this allows you to write on the goal (especially using cross-platform websites or services, like 4thewords or google docs) , and the small screen can also help minimize distractions by muting notifications in your writing time.

[tizeline]

Hi, love your Au and your art!

Since the Drax boys have lived in the Hidden City their whole lives, they have a much better sense of community than the Donnie. Even if they aren't the most well liked since I assume most yokai find their views on human's extreme. They can still go down to a supermarket, a restaurant, a park. All things in which Donnie has never been able to do out in daylight. How would they react onto figuring out. "Oh, crap this kid is a socially isolated weirdo [affectionate]." Like would they do a montage of dragging Donnie to all their favorite places? Also, I imagine that yokai culture has different faux pas, any Donnie might just accidentally do something offensive, like how he did in Witch town by not collecting the worms right. Or he might accidentally do something incredibly dangerous like go to a place with gangs or go to Big Mama's and he'd have no idea because Donnie's not a resident of the Hidden City. Also, do you think Yokai celebrate Christmas or New Years? I imagine it would be very weird for Donnie to see people that look like you and be under the same category of 'freak' (in the human city) just walking around doing everyday things. Especially since Donnie's spent his whole life hiding, walking around and not worrying about if some human scientist is going to nab you must be world-endingly weird. Also, it would probably give Donnie hope for things he's never been able to do before. Make a proper friend group, own a home in a neighborhood, and go to college. All the regular teen things he see's people in the movies and April doing.

Also, something I've always wondered in canon, do you think Donnie has his shots? Since he can't access a regular doctor, do you think he's just like a carrier of every single dead disease. I assume he's probably immune to a lot of sicknesses because of how Draxum made them. But imagine Draxums reaction when he wants to get Donnie's medical records (I imagine Draxum is a stickler for health, shots, and Doctor checkups as a form of affection) and Donnie has to tell him he's literally never been to an actual Doctor. I imagine at some point he made records for himself, but that was probably when he got a bit older, so for the first seven years or so, Splinter was just hoping Donnie didn't come down with anything deadly.

I'm also betting that the Drax boys are a bit smarter than canon because Draxum seems like the type of person to do ZERO skimping on education. Like yes, Donnie's still smarter, however I do think they Drax boys are just smarter than canon, like they probably know high school algebra, science, yokai history all that stuff. I think it would be cool to see the boys reference a piece of yokai culture of history and Donnie just be like ".....what". I imagine it make him very mad to be out of the loop in any piece of knowledge. However, Donnie could make a human pop culture reference and also get the Drax boys confused.

LMAO yeah it's quite weird for Donnie to be able to just. Walk around in public without having to worry about anyone finding out that he's a mutant. It takes him a while to adjust to the fact that he doesn't have to hide his turtle-features amongst yōkai, he probably instictually keeps doing it for a while at first (keeping to the shadows and wearing clothes that hides his appearence, stuff like that).

His brothers are quite eager to introduce Donnie to all the cool stuff in The Hidden City that he's been missing out on. And while part of Donnie's difficulty with social interactions is just a symptom of him being autistic, him growing up so isolated definitely made things even harder for him. A lot of his knowledge about social etiquette he learned from like........ shows and movies, and I don't think 80s martial arts- and campy sci-fi-movies are the best teachers on how to interact with others lol. He had April of course, but she's one person and also kind of a weirdo too. And all of that just may have given him insight on how to socialize in human society, he's very unprepared for yōkai society!

His brothers really don't mind this, partially because Donnie's behavior is so similar to Draxum so they honestly just find it endearing. They also fully expected Donnie to have been completely traumatized from living amongst humans. The fact that he's (mostly) fine, just a bit eccentric, is great news to them! Also a lot of yōkai consider the entire Draxum family to be a bunch of weirdos too, maybe Donnie doesn't really fit in amongst other yōkai as much as he'd liked but he DOES fit in amongst his family, both the Hamatos and the Draxums! :]

Also LMAOOO- Splinter: "This is my son Donatello, he has every disease"

Honestly..... yeah Donnie kinda mostly relied on his mutation-enhanced immune system growing up. Donnie, being a NERD, might have figured out how to get himself vaccinated for at least some stuff eventually. I also imagine with Splinter knowing he himself is the closest thing to a medic he or Donnie were ever gonna get access to, he put in effort into research and other precautions to be safe. That being said, he's not an expert, and while I do believe the Hamato Ninja Training included some basic medical training like first aid and such, there's the small problem of both Splinter and Donnie both having EXTREMELY weird biology on account of the mutation, so Splinter kinda just had to guess a lot and hope for the best when it came to Donnie's health

Regardless, I absolutely belive that as soon as Donnie's relationship with Draxum became slightly less hostile, Draxum managed to convince Donnie to sit down for a checkup. And OMG Draxum being so concerned about his kids' health as a form of affection is both adorable and hilarious 😭

And yup the Drax Bros got a much better education in the AU compared to canon lmaooo (Leo still doesn't like reading books though). Donnie is still definitely the most academically gifted, but yeah his brothers of course are going to know a lot more about yōkai stuff in general, which kinda makes Donnie a little bit insecure. Specifially when Raph, Mikey and Leo start talking about something yōkai-related that Donnie is completely ignorant of, then that makes him feel a bit left out. Of course, then he, April will talk about something human-related and then his brothers are the ones out of the loop (aside from maybe Leo he knows quite a bit about human pop-culture)

[agentoffangirling]

I really don't like it when people try to present Team Cap and Team Iron Man as being the same thing, bc they're very clearly not? (And sorry for doing this type of discourse in 2025, but it needs to be said)

Because let's be honest, the mainline MCU didn't really focus on the Sokovia Accords past Civil War. It's not present in Doctor Strange, Black Widow, Homecoming (at least in a large capacity), certainly not Ragnarok or GOTG 2, Black Panther, and almost no one cares by Infinity War. When we look at the projects post Accords, there are hardly any moments where they matter, and by 2025, they're fully repealed. Nine years of being active, five of whom were during the Snap, meaning only four years, and most of the projects don't go very in depth. That tends to lead mainline audiences into believing it was never that bad in the first place and that Cap was being selfish

But we see how the Accords really effect everyday powered people in the supplemental material like Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. After being introduced, powered people had three options

Go into hiding. Live a normal life. Never show off your abilities

Sign the Accords. If you were part of a government agency like S.H.I.E.L.D., it is heavily implied you had to sign or you couldn't work for them anymore

Don't sign and show off your powers? You go to the Raft

This went for everyone, it didn't matter if your power was making farts smell good, you counted as powered. Imagine the bank down the street is getting robbed, with these in place, you couldn't do anything about it if you weren't signed or you risked going to jail; they're awful options

Or what if you were signed? Great, now all your information (powers, weaknesses, danger level, LITERALLY EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU) is held in a massive server that can be easily hacked and accessed. We see in AoS s4 that signed Inhumans are getting harmed bc the Watchdogs, a hate organization, was able to get their hands on their information and find out exactly where they were. POWERED PEOPLE WORE TRACKERS THAT WAS CONSTANTLY BEING UPDATED ON THEIR LOCATION. THAT'S FUCKING WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS

Let's switch gears for a sec here and go to another side, where thankfully, that isn't happening to you, but you do wanna make some kind of change in your community. You notice that people are going missing, that there's weird power outages and decide that's worth looking into, so you go to the council and present your case. Now, as we all know, politicians never agree on anything, so the chance of getting an immediate yes is almost impossible (I'd argue 1% is far too generous in this case). It may take weeks, months, or the decision is swept under the rug and oopsies, now the entirety of Florida is covered by a blanket of darkness!

Or you get a no, and actually, they want you to check out this tiny little village in New Zealand, and so you have no choice but to go. You quickly realize that this isn't really worth your time and feel like your services are required elsewhere, but again, you're not able to back out. When you return, you find that London has been utterly destroyed. This is a situation that Steve himself brings up, and it's something that absolutely could happen! There are just endless risks to this

Then, of course, the worst scenario, being sent to the Raft, which, bc it's in international waters, they can do whatever they want to you!! Doesn't matter if it's inhumane, no one can do shit about it. It's stated in "Jessica Jones" that prisoners aren't allowed to have any contact with the outside world, and if you go in there, you go in for good. Almost no one makes it out. Again, it doesn't matter who you were and what your powers were, you would be stuck inside with the worst of the worst. WANDA MAXIMOFF WAS IN A SHOCK COLLAR AND STRAIGHTJACKET. How in any situation is that okay??

Steve understood this, understood the true consequences of handing themselves over to hundreds of governments. He wasn't against having regulations (neither am I) but he knew this wasn't the right way to go

One side holds all the power. The other holds nothing. This is in no way equal

[thatcryptidinthesea]

So I've been thinking way too hard about the ISAT role!swap aus by @anxiousapplepie (hi! hope you don't mind the tag :]), especially the Housemaiden!Siffrin AU, and I was planning to draw fanart with my ideas but my university assignments have been looming over me *head in hands*. So in the mean time here's all my thoughts rambled out onto paper so maybe they'll stop haunting me while I'm trying to do work.

Starting with some HCs:

• Having depression is an inherently Siffrin trait, the different Sifs just deal with it differently. HM!Sif was able to get access to antidepressants due to being in the House of Dormont, but wasn't able to take them with him when he had to flee from the King's curse. So like OG!Mira, they had to go through their journey unmedicated. Isabeu and Odile's ractions to finding this out was something like

• All Miras are medicated for their anxiety, and most of them were able to have access to their meds throughout their journeys (OG!Mira and T!Mira I'm so sorry but you had to do it scared). F!Mira made double sure she brought her's knowing HM!Siffrin didn't have their's.

• Once T!Bonnie started warming up to and trusting the party, they'd hide behind the others' legs when they didn't want to be seen. Hiding behind Siffrin had the added bonus of being able to hide under his cape.

• When T!Bonnie has had a particularly rough night, they'll go sleep next to Siffrin because they know Sif WILL end up cuddling them in his sleep and it makes them feel safe. <- I imagine a lot of their sibling relationship was built on Bonnie going to Sif and just silently clinging and Sif just letting them and not forcing them to talk.

• C!Odile is the best fusion cook ever. This woman can take any two cuisines and mix them together flawlessly. Even things that arguably should never go together.

Ok now for a character ramble under the cut because Housemaiden!Siffrin is that one character I want to put under the microscope like a beetle. Argh. The angst of being the Universe's walking talking religious contradiction...

There's so much potential for HM!Siffrin's inner struggle with the Change belief. For one thing he doesn't really get to choose how he Changes much, he doesn't really have control over it. You can't decide how you'll be a different person if you have no idea who you originally were. Yet the Change belief has this whole thing about choosing to Change yourself and choosing to leave your past self behind. Can you imagine being Siffrin and being told you have to decide to be a completely different person when the only info you have about yourself are the clothes on your back, your accent and a love for malanga fritters? Meanwhile everyone else can choose to Change however they like because they know who they are and how they can be different, and they get to choose to get rid of the mementos of their past because they still ultimately have the memories if they ever want to go back for whatever reason.

And the fact Sif can't really choose to Change kinda shows in the ways he does decide to change because they're all physical changes. They recut their cloak into a cape, they dyed their hair and then let it regrow, they trade weapons or headgear with Mira. Those are all things that he can actually control, and thus can actually make choices about.

Which also makes me think about how he got the "worst/laziest Housemaiden ever" title. It probably felt to any outside perspective who knew the Change belief that Siffrin wasn't putting in any effort to Change and was instead skirting around the rules by just physically changing. So people started to say he's lazy and not following the belief right, and because Siffrin didn't have an identity he internalised being the Worst Housemaiden Ever as his identity and kind of stopped trying because why bother? Which SUCKS because can you imagine losing literally everything about your home/culture/language/family and then trying to make a new home and identity with another community only to be told by that community "hey you're terrible at this actually"? That's awful. Siffrin can probably never really feel truly, confidently part of the Change belief because they were alienated from it from the start.

And then to finally top it all off when Euphrasie chose him to save Vaugarde it's likely no one believed that Sif was the saviour because he's known across the Houses as the Worst Housemaiden Ever, why would the Head Housemaiden of Dormont choose him?!? Which probably only cranked up Sif's self-esteem issues because they'd also think Euphrasie could've picked better.

So yeah *head in hands* Housemaiden!Siffrin feels like a character locked in a constant feedback loop of "can't be part of the community despite their efforts because the system is inherently flawed for them" and "doesn't bother trying so the community disregards them".

[alpaca-clouds]

Worldbuild Differently: Unthink Religion

This week I want to talk a bit about one thing I see in both fantasy and scifi worldbuilding: Certain things about our world that we live in right now are assumed to be natural, and hence just adapted in the fantasy world. With just one tiny problem: They are not natural, and there were more than enough societies historically that avoided those pitfalls.

Tell me, if you have heard this one before: You have this fantasy world with so many differnet gods that are venerated. So what do you do to venerate those gods? Easy! You go into those big temple structures with the stained glass in their windows, that for some reason also use incense in their rituals. DUH!

Or: Please, writers, please just think one moment on why the fuck you always just want to write Christianity. Because literally no other religion than Christianity has buildings like that! And that has to do a lot with medieval and early post-medieval culture. I am not even asking you to look into very distant cultures. Just... Look of mosques and synagogues differ from churches. And then maybe look at Roman and Greek temples. That is all I am asking.

Let's make one thing clear: No matter what kind of world you are building, there is gonna be religion. It does not matter if you are writing medieval fantasy, stoneage fantasy, or some sort of science fiction. I know that a lot of atheists hate the idea that a scifi world has religion, but... Look, human brains are wired to believe in the paranormal. That is simply how we are. And even those atheists, that believe themselves super rational, do believe in some weird stuff that is about as scientific as any religions. (Evolutionary Psychology would be such an example.)

What the people will believe in will differ from their circumstance and the world they life in, but there is gonna be religion of some sort. Because we do need some higher power to blame, we need the rituals of it, and we need the community aspect of it.

Ironically I personally am still very much convinced that IRL even in a world like the Forgotten Realms, people would still make up new gods they would pray to, even with a whole pantheon of very, very real gods that exist. (Which is really sad, that this gets so rarely explored.)

However, how this worship looks like is very different. Yes, the Abrahamitic religions in general do at least have in common that they semi-regularily meet in some sort of big building to pray to their god together. Though how much the people are expected to go into that temple to pray is actually quite different between those religions and the subgroups of those religions.

Other religions do not have this though. Some do not have those really big buildings, and often enough only a select few are even allowed into the big buildings - or those might only be accessible during some holidays.

Instead a lot of polytheistic religions make a big deal of having smaller shrines dedicated to some of the gods. Often folks will have their own little shrine at home where they will pray daily. Alternatively there are some religions where there might be a tiny shrine outside that people will go to to pray to.

Funnily enough that is also something I have realized Americans often don't quite get: Yeah, this was a thing in Christianity, too. In Europe you will still find those tiny shrines to certain saints (because technically speaking Christianity still works as a polytheistic religion, only that we have only one god, but a lot of saints that take over the portfolios of the polytheistic gods). I am disabled, and even in the area I can reach on foot I know of two hidden shrines. One of them is to Mary, and one... I am honestly not sure, as the masonry is too withered to say who was venerated there. Usually those shrines are bieng kept in a somewhat okay condition by old people, but yeah...

Of course, while with historically inspired fantasy settings make this easy (even though people still hate their research), things get a bit harder with science fiction.

Again, the atheist idea is often: "When we develop further scientifically, we will no longer need religion!" But I am sorry, folks. This is not how the human brain works. We see weird coincidences and will go: "What paranormal power was responsible for it?" We can now talk about why the human brain has developed this way. We are evolved to find patterns, and we are evolved (because social animal and such) to try and understand the will others have - so far that we will read will in nature. It is simply how our brains work.

So, what will scifi cultures believe in? I don't know. Depends on your worldbuilding. Maybe they believe in the ghost in the machine, maybe there si some other religions there. You can actually go very wild with it. But you need to unthink the normativity of Christianity to do that. And that is... what I see too little off.

[thezombieprostitute]

I have a thot because of your new royal au:

Your kingdom is suffering from spontaneous, souring diplomatic ties and instability.

The council suspects the enemy kingdom. So, you’re sent as a spy via marriage to their youngest prince.

Who is your new husband and how is he like? And will you be able to keep this secret hidden?

Congratulations, @ktficworld, you've inspired another story-line for the Royal Vows AU!

Royal Family

Summary: Your cousin's death leads to you marrying her brother-in-law for the good of your kingdoms and so you can find answers.

Word Count: ~2.5k

A/N: Reader is female. No other physical descriptors used.

Warnings: Death of a character, Espionage, Loss of virginity, Smut. Please let me know if I missed any!

Hal never expected to be married so soon. As the baby of the family, last in line for the throne, he knew he'd never be a first pick for an alliance. Nick, probably Bucky, too, would be married for new alliances while Hal and Jefferson, the ones who would never inherit the throne, would be wed to already allied kingdoms as a kind of "vow renewal" between the nations.

Jefferson had been the first to wed. Her name was Priscilla. They'd actually been pretty happy, especially after Grace arrived. But when a riding accident killed Priscilla, it seemed to break Jefferson. His brothers all rallied around him, supporting him and Grace, who was just a toddler at the time. But Priscilla's kingdom soured towards the brothers' kingdom of Hoviriand.

It was recommended that, after a proper mourning time, another marriage should be in the works. No one was going to ask Jefferson to remarry so Hal agreed to it, under the condition he and his future wife could stay at the same manor where he'd built his gardens. He'd built those from scratch to bring their mother joy as disease took her. He'd gotten his hands dirty, calloused and bloody for those gardens and he wanted to maintain them.

The terms were agreed to and now he's dressed in his finest, waiting at the altar for you.

Whenever you talked with your friends from other kingdoms it was clear your upbringing was far different from theirs. While you'd all been taught proper mannerisms of a Lady of the Court, none of them ever seemed to have also been raised in the ways of espionage. Either they were far better at keeping and discovering secrets than you, or they simply weren't taught. Given what you know of other kingdoms, you're inclined to think the latter.

Priscilla had been your uncle's only daughter and the Princess had been as well loved by the people as she had been by her family. She was your favorite cousin, the only one who could outsmart you. Her death had raised questions about the reliability of the kingdom of Hoviriand. Rumors had spread that her death was purposeful.

The Queen, herself, asked if you'd take this mission. You'd marry a prince of Hoviriand to give you access to their inner workings and get answers about what happened to Priscilla. It was expected to take time, of course. You'd likely be with child already by the time you were able to communicate Hoviriand's secrets. But it was what you were trained for and it would help support your cousin's memory.

And now you're dressed in your finest, getting ready to walk down the altar to meet your husband for the first time.

The wedding goes well, the reception even better. The tone is one of subdued happiness; renewal after sadness. Jefferson and Grace were not present, but that was agreed to be for the best. Prince Bucky attended to them while Prince Nick attended the wedding. On the surface they seemed a very supportive and loving family, but you know to not let that cloud your judgment.

Hal is a complete gentleman through the entire thing, as you'd expected. He wasn't the smartest or cleverest of the brothers, but he certainly seemed the most honest and caring. That was something you would be using to your advantage.

The two of you were placed into a limousine for the trip to his manor, giving you and your husband a bit of time to actually talk and get to know each other.

"I know there are expectations of us, but I want you to know, we don't have to do anything you ain't comfortable with," Hal tells you. "It's a lot of change in very little time and I'm not one for pushing you."

"Thank you for that, Hal," you smile and squeeze his hand. "But, if it's okay with you, I'd like to at least sleep in the same bed as you. Maybe cuddle to get used to each other?"

"I can do that," he smiles. "We'll go at your pace, if that's okay."

"Thank you," you bat your eyelashes. Play at being a little shy, get him close, let him underestimate you. Catch him off guard when the cuddles become more because you want to "fulfill your duties" and properly consummate the marriage. There's no way he will deny you.

Hal is nervous as he gets ready for bed. You asked for cuddles and he's happy to give you that, but he's worried he won't be able to control himself, that he'll wake with a hard-on and scare you. You're so shy and quiet, he doesn't want to push you or make you regret the marriage. He's not sure if you have any experience in bed, but he's also not sure how to ask about that without sounding rude. He doesn't want to offend you or do something worth getting smacked for. If nothing else, his mother raised him better than that.

He was used to walking around the manor shirtless and going to bed wearing nothing but that wasn't an option tonight. Probably not for a few nights at least. He grabs a tank top and a pair of boxers and puts them on before leaving the closet to get to bed. He steps out just as you're leaving the bathroom wearing a silk nightgown that reveals a lot more skin than he was expecting and his breath hitches.

You notice Hal taking a few deep breaths and inwardly smile. The nightgown was specifically chosen for tonight and packed with the "vital" items that were moved to the manor before the wedding. You're grateful that Hal is actually a handsome. For years you'd been scared that you would be married off to a creepy old man. But Hal is easy on the eyes and your thighs clench together as you see how well muscled he is. The heat rushing to your face isn't entirely forced.

"I um..." you bat your eyelashes and look away, pretending to be shy.

"You get yourself comfortable, and I'll join you for cuddles?"

"Sounds good." You nod and move to the bed. It's large enough that, if you want space, you'll get it. But the goal for tonight isn't distancing yourself. It's also comfortable enough that most of your noises of pleasure are legitimate. You hear Hal make a small hissing noise and fight the urge to smirk. When you're settled you pat the space next to you and Hal immediately moves in for cuddles.

It's a little awkward for a few minutes as the two of you work to get comfortable. You've never actually been held before, not so intimately at least. It takes you a minute to let yourself relax, Sure your theoretical knowledge of sex and intimacy is excellent, but the practical is nonexistent. When you do let yourself lean into his touch, it's surprising how warm and comfortable it feels to be wrapped in his arms.

"This feels nice," you confess as you caress his arm.

He squeezes you a little tighter in acknowledgement. "And I promise I'll behave."

"I don't know that I want that," you breathe.

His body tenses as his pulse speeds up. "Then I promise I won't do anything without you telling me you want it."

Your own pulse starts to race as your breathing becomes shallower. "I've never...I mean, I know. I read up on these things, but I've never actually..."

"Then it's all the more important that you get to call the shots," Hal reassures, his voice hoarse with need.

"I can feel your...your, um..."

"And? You call the shots here, not my anatomy. You're my wife, not my...not my sex toy or whatever."

You turn in his arms so you can face him. His bright blue eyes are darker than you've ever seen them and, given how tight his jaw is, he's clearly struggling to keep himself under control.

"You really mean that," you whisper.

"Of course," he answers, confusion written all over his face.

You lean in to give him a deep kiss, making him moan as his hands pull you up against him. When you break for a breath, you rasp, "please take me. I want you."

"You're sure about this?" he groans. "I need you to be sure."

Looking into his eyes you confirm, "I want this. I want you. Please."

Hal throws the covers off of you as he rolls you onto your back, planting his lips onto yours. His kisses become fervent and his knee nudges your legs apart, allowing his pelvis to slowly rut against yours. The friction has you moaning into his mouth.

He pulls away and gently cups your face. "Do not hesitate to tell me to stop. The second you say 'stop' I will. It doesn't matter if we've barely gotten started or I'm about to cum inside you. Please don't be afraid to tell me 'no' or 'stop'."

You nod in understanding. "Thank you, Hal. You're a dream come true." You mean what you say. Hal was kind, patient, and genuine. A much better husband than you could have hoped for, even if you'll never be as honest with him as he is with you.

Hal helps you out of your nightgown and you feel genuinely shy at being seen like this by a stranger. But that shyness dies down after he removes his own clothes and starts kissing along your neck. He works his way down to your breasts and alternates licking, sucking and fondling them. You were practiced in making the noises men want to hear but with Hal they were real. Your hips start rolling underneath his and groans as he gently bites your nipple.

He starts kissing down your front and confusion starts infringing on your lust.

"What...what are you doing?"

He looks up at you, eyes matching your confusion. "I thought you said you'd read up on these things?"

"But...but you're a prince. I...I haven't shaved..."

Hal smiles and winks, "I'm still a man who aims to please."

He uses his fingers to spread your labia before licking a stripe up your pussy. It feels so good you whimper. His tongue starts gently caressing your clit as he watches for your reactions.

"More, please," you whine.

His tongue starts moving faster, more firmly and your back arches as you moan. One of his fingers slides easily into your pussy and you let out a gasp, quickly turning into a moan as your pussy clenches around the digit. He starts slowly moving his finger in and out of your, now drenched, core.

You feel your orgasm building and start playing with your breasts and whimpering. Hal deftly adds a second finger and you roll your head back with a truly lascivious groan. His fingers reach a particularly sensitive spot and you cry out in pleasure. Hal's fingers focus on it and you chant "yes, yes, yes" until the coil snaps and your orgasm washes over you. As you writhe in pleasure he groans at how tightly your clenching around his fingers. The groan adds a new sensation and you're overcome with need.

"More, please, Hal! Please!"

You whine as he removes his fingers and pulls his mouth off of you.

"Don't worry, pretty daisy. We're just getting started."

Daisy? is as far as your brain gets before Hal starts eating you out and all you can think to do is wrap your legs around his head, crying out in pleasure. He lifts your hips enough to give his tongue better access and your next orgasm hits you like a tsunami. All you know right now is pleasure and you never want it to stop.

Hal is careful about working you through your orgasm. He wants to make sure the pleasure lasts but doesn't become too much too soon. His own lust is making it hard to keep control but he needs this to be good for you. Your legs start trembling and he gently pushes them away, slowly separating himself from you so that he can position himself on top of you.

"How are you holding up, sweet daisy?" he coaxes, gently wiping the tears from your face.

"I think...I think I need more," you stutter. Another statement you'd never thought you'd honestly say. You know it's what he wants to hear, that he needs to be sated as well. But your pussy is aching in a way you've never experienced before and you're certain you want him.

He gently kisses you before lining himself up with your entrance. "Remember, you always have the power to tell me to stop," he reiterates with a kiss before slowly pushing into you.

The stretch feels incredible. There is some pain, yes, but not much. You kiss Hal's neck and shoulder in encouragement as he tells you how amazing you feel, how well you're taking him, how beautiful you are. By the time he's fully sheathed you feel blissfully full.

His rolls his hips you moan into his shoulder, telling him to do that again. He eagerly does so, quickly picking up speed. Part of you expects it to all start hurting but Hal is still paying attention to signals you don't even know you're giving. He finds a good pace for both of you and moves his hand between your bodies to play with your pearl. It catches you off guard that he's still thinking about your pleasure and you're quick cum again, clenching tightly around him. His hips start to stutter and he groans as his seed spills inside of you.

It takes a minute for you to catch your breath. You run your fingers through Hal's hair to help ground yourself as you blink the tears from your eyes.

Hal comes to his senses and starts to pull away from you, giving you gentle kisses and caresses, praising you. You hiss when he pulls out and he's quick to check that you're okay. He tries to get out of bed but you hold him tight.

"Where are you going?" you rasp.

He gives you a small kiss and a smile. "I'm gonna run you a bath. Made sure to get the bathroom stocked up with things that should help you relax and recover."

"What about you?"

"Taking care of you is the priority right now. If you'll let me, that is." You give him a small smile and nod.

As he goes to draw you a bath you're finally able to think. You think about Priscilla and wonder if Hal's brother was as kind as he is. Did he treat her so well or is it just Hal that takes care of his partners? As determined as you are to get answers about what happened to Priscilla, a small part of you starts hoping the rumors are just that: rumors. That you can find the proof to put them to rest and not have to risk hurting Hal.

No, you think. Don't let your feelings bias you. You've got a mission. That's that priority. It's just the hormones talking.

That's all it is. All it will be.

Tagging: @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @irishhappiness; @kmc1989; @lokislady82; @peaches1958; @ronearoundblindly

[giantkillerjack]

LOOKING FOR FEEDBACK FROM WHEELCHAIR USERS

EDIT: this post is out of date. The current version can be found here.

TL;DR - Any kind of feedback you can provide regarding what YOU want and don't want from a wheelchair lift experience would be super helpful!! -- AND/OR, I'd also appreciate any input you might have about what a community space would have to be like in order to be inviting and welcoming to you!

Any input - small or extensive, general or specific - would be SO appreciated!! I'm hoping to deliver this feedback in the next couple days.

More info under the cut:

Hi, y'all! So I've been doing some work for this really awesome co-op project that has managed to purchase a small apartment building in our city, with the goal of providing our community with affordable housing, emergency preparedness, and an accessible community space!

Currently, the building is NOT wheelchair accessible, but they are seeking to rectify that issue, starting with the community gathering space in the basement. Funding is tight, so they really only have one chance at getting this right.

In the long-term when they have way more money, they aim to have full building accessibility, including an elevator.

But in the short-term, the proposed plan is to replace a set of stairs going down to the basement from the outside with an enclosed wheelchair lift.

If you check out highlighted yellow parts of the diagram below, it illustrates what the plan is. (Ignore all the other labels in the "BEFORE" part; it was just the best diagram I could find that included the stairs on short notice.)

There has also been some talk about widening all the hallways in the basement, which I plan to voice my strong support for.

Thus far, I am aware that some wheelchair lifts can only be operated from the outside, and that this is stupid. But I imagine there are a LOT of other pitfalls/needs that I'm not catching as a person who does not use a wheelchair! (I am trying to get a motorized chair, actually, but until then, I use a rollator or a cane. I've never used a wheelchair lift.)

Any feedback you could give me would be really appreciated! What should we avoid? What do you wish existed? What does it look like for you to feel comfortable in a space? How can we make this community space accessible for YOU??

Thank you very very much!!

[cerine0357]

May I ask some general headcanons about Hyejun Shimizu?

oc: The Shimizu family:-

Hyejun Shimizu X Reader

-:: Summary: Oh my! New articles come out!! The richest family, THE Shimizus, eldest son is dating someone?! What does this special someone experience in their relationship??

-:: Fluff|| Headcanons, scenarios|| mentions of nudity, sex, chaebols and rich people in general, paps too. This is small|| Normal/semi-yandere version of OC.

-:: Author's notes: Thank you so much for requesting this!! I guess people really like the eldest son!

Hyejun Shimizu dating HCs

≔ Hyejun is the eldest of his family, the heir of some of the larger business on his dad's side, which he was all too glad to take up, being a chaebol of sorts..he's been trained for this since he was happily ready to take his dad's work he had lots of interest in.

≔ While this gave his siblings the chance to actually choose their own careers, it made him just as busy as his parents, if not slightly more being trained and also enjoying his youth, weirdly like any other nepo baby.

≔ So while he's incredibly kind, it takes a bit to get his attention which you somehow managed and managed to have the eldest Shimizu son eating out of the palms. Literally...And soon that obsession furthered, until it spills over the Baccarat crystal glasses of his heart with a stupid fat crush.

≔ Him crushing on you is one experience and DATING HIM is a whole another one. Publicity everywhere like what do you mean the RICHEST family, literal TRLLIONAIRES', The Shimizus, eldest son was DATING SOMEONE?! And it's not someone from the chaebol circles?! IT's like a k-drama, are you serious?!

≔ I mean, it's insane. Articles all asking who you were, why are you dating him? How did you even gain access to his heart when some of the prettiest chaebols daughters and sons couldn't?? It's a title worthy the front pages for weeks, months even. Demanding Shimizu Reoiji to explain it out, which his father doesn't bother to.

≔ What do you want? A trip to cleanest beaches? Want to watch a movie in a football stadium? Want him to customize world's most expensive car for you with your name fixed in your favourite coloured diamonds on the bonnet so while he pounds you over it, so you can see your name on the most expensive car to exist. To see HIS LOVE and his sweetheart's name, YOUR name.

≔ He gets you multiple Richard-Mille watches, if you like them. Gets the literal designeers of the biggest brands to personally make you outfits. Gifts you jewellery which is equal to a small country's GDP? It's all yours. And don't say no, you can't....because he will give them to you.

≔ He rents out a whole hallways in the bigger resorts so you two can chase each other, for fun, and get privacy. If you have pets, brings them to resorts, where animals are not allowed, money fixes a lot of things, you learned..But some Hyejun stays humble, despite his pride. And being his father's carbon copy, people are scared shitless.

≔ But, leaving the 'eat the rich' style he has. He might like to do your hair for you, mainly cause he's been doing his sister's hairs and even his mum's or his nanny's hair if they'd let him. I like to think he was a lone hair under a phone protect screen in his past life or he just has a very deep fixation on learning to do every texture of hair and even style. He likes to accessorize a lot to, hope you have accessories in mind!~

≔ He is a good communicator too, saw his mum and da have a healthy relationship with them always finding time for each other despite balancing large businesses and their 22 children, including him, and even his fair-few nannies ro servants working in the manor in his teenage years taught him how to be a good boyfriend, they were also his guidors alongside his parents and he communicated all on how to be a healthy partner with his siblings when they came of age.

≔ He communicates his feelings, but he does get very busy and sometimes a bit haughty and out of touch because he was raised a trillionaire nepo baby. Forgive him, he was always spoiled, stupid hoe, but we love him for that!~

≔ At times, he hires cleaners for all your chores at your house, who clean the house for you while you overwatch and his personal bodyguards look after you. You are likely added into wills of his bodyguards, they know so much with how much Hyejun talks to them about you.

≔ He sometimes makes you playlist, buys you premium for all apps you want, lets you put bows in his hair, but he hopes he can take them out before he enters meetings. He cooks a little bit, because sure they have a private chef..but they were also taught how to cook by their nannies a little bit. Though he's always willing to try to make food from your culture, what do you like, what did you at everyday? A dessert?

≔ he takes you spa treatment twice every month where he reminds everything in his body with you, gets a bit jealous of someone massaging you, but does nothing except pout and look at you with his round eyes and you left him massage your feet at the end of the day after you're both done.

≔ He would find it hard..but maybe after marriage and after the point where you both are mentally married because you've both been dating so long, it's really no surprise. He'll take you camping with his family, including extended family members where you both share a tent and with a strict budget for everything. It's like fifty nepos and you, a humble quween.

≔ Once he learns what "us" texts are, h's sending them all to you. He might want to send himself texts, but he doesn't wanna feel alone, so he makes a chat with Izumi, Hyuna, Hyunizo, Ayano, Ilseong, Dejiyo and his mum which is labelled "photos of my [NAME]" and there isn't even a photo of you.

≔ But it does have a photo of an antique plate which has a porcelain bear with blanket sleeping on the plate, a photo of a plank with water drops shaped vaguely like a heart, Hyunizo's bag which has a real clam keychain which holds his earphones besides a keychain of a tiny glass heart shaped perfume bottle, some opalescent, translucent tea cups from 1930s.

≔ Sun falling on sheets in the vague shape of a face, a little button on Reoiji's suit with your first name's initial, someone's nails done inspired by Monet painting, two sunflowers facing each other, neon glowing heart shaped handles in a rave club, a pair of heels in the window of a shop besides a pair of dark leather loafers, a ribbon besides a vintage watch and an open sandwich with a piece of egg snuggled between two pieces of lettuce like a luxurious scarf or blanket.

≔ Makes a pinterest and it's solely for photos and aesthetics he thinks you'd enjoy; from pretty nails to clothes to aesthetics or simply ideas of couples and he even stalks your pinterest to see what you want to get it for you.

© cerine0357. All characters belong to me; Aurelia, Moon, Cerine. Reblogging is appreciated, but plagiarizing or copying my works is forbidden, thank you for ready and if you like this check out my blog!

[inexplicifics]

Is there a way for Cahir to stay in contact with MEN and Letho and any other friends he makes this winter without it seeming like spying? Is the treaty enough to allow that kind of communication between courts, or would it have to be a secret (at least in Nilfgaard)? I think you’ve said in the past that Seraphina and the Cranes improved xenovoxes so they are two-way like walkie-talkies now, but they’re still crazy expensive and I’m not sure if you said whether they needed some kind of magic to operate, but I’d be worried that giving him a little portal box like Milena’s friends could be an issue of safety considering how much more access to mages Nilgaard has than Redania and and how carefully warded the keep is. If those don’t work, it feels like the only options are spell ravens and normal couriers, but both are conspicuous and the latter leaves room for easy interception... My brain is breaking while trying to find a solution that isn’t just that they won’t be able to correspond until they see each other in person, but that seems so sad.

My current plan is to give Morvran a two-way portal letterbox heavily enchanted so that no one but Morvran and Cahir can actually open it, as well as some pendants from Yen which prevent mind-reading (or, more likely, make it appear that the person whose mind is being read is thinking something innocuous, so as to prevent suspicion).

They'll still have to be careful, but a little less so. And Cahir will be able to write to his friends.

Morvran will be able to send correspondence more openly, especially to Ciri, who he's still supposed to be not-quite-wooing. But anything he doesn't want spies to read will need to be sent via letterbox.

[mintmatcha]

Mint you make such delicious conflicts between characters. I keep think about the realization that Akaashi, Bokuto and you are a relationship. The whole thing is a big misunderstanding but also becomes a precursor to a lot of hurt.

You honest to goodness thought you were cheating on Akaashi. You were doing it on purpose, to get what you want, regardless of his feelings. And for that guilt to suddenly just be canceled out leaves a weird hole that feels dumbly smoothed over. Of course you dreaded what might happen if you got caught, yet having everything just kind of be okay in the end feels as if you got off scott free. It sounds silly but you feel as if you should be punished.

And its a betrayal of communication too. Why did the two of them let you walk around not knowing, thinking it was just automatic that all three of you were together, leaving you simmering in that guilt created out of nothing? If not Bo, Akaashi should definitely know better. And sure it just so happens that Bokuto is attractive and caring and magnetic, but what if you didn't think about him like that? Where's your say in this? They never even thought to ask you. You had all been "dating the whole time and you just didn't realize it". Its like you just discovered you've been standing on a trapdoor this whole time. It could fall away any second. Bo and Akaashi's relationship far eclipses yours. Dispite the surplus of affection, there's a part of you that feels like an outsider in your own relationship. Whose to say they won't just drop you? You embrace it, the new avenue of love and sudden permission and access. You're frequently found sitting on Bokuto's lap, benefitting from wild and hot sex you had known to be bittersweet before and should now be just sweet. But the bitterness lingers. Sometimes it feels like when they look at you, they might not actually care what you think, everything's already been decided for you.

Akaashi is relieved that this was all just a big misunderstanding and he's thrilled that the pieces have fallen together for his two loves, at least for the first little bit. It was so odd to feel like he was trying to protect Bo against you, but now he understands why, and besides the three of you are almost glued together now so everything is okay. Though he keeps finding himself yanked out of sweet moments by the niggling thought that you didn't think that Bokuto was part of your relationship with him, and yet you slept with him anyway. He knew only because of Bokuto. Meanwhile you didn't tell him a single word about it. You lied to him. Occasionally he finds that this non-betrayal betrayal lances through his chest and becomes the only thing he can think about, sticks to his brain like gum. You've already shown the capacity for it, would you do it again? It would be so easy. Then the feeling that he's against you comes back, a private suspicion he tries to will away. You lied to him. Because everything was nullified there's no apology to give so why dies he feel like he needs one?

And Bo doesn't make it out unscathed either. All the rejection is easily explained away by you having not known, and its a rush to have all his love returned full force, but the memory of it stays. He finds himself hesitating when it comes to you, a little bit afraid that this time when he reaches out you might go back to pulling away. You had only intended to date Akaashi after all. What if you're lying about loving him too just to placate them both and stay with Akaashi? Besides that, its not as if he felt like he cheated, but now knowing you had used him to cheat on his own boyfriend makes him complicit in a crime he never thought he could be a part of. You cast him in that role. Is that really what you think of him? As someone who could cheat with his "best friend"s girlfriend? And also, how could you not have known? If not the love between you and him, certainly the love between him and Akaashi. Should he be worried that it doesn't seem that he and Akaashi are in love? He goes overboard trying to 'prove' this stuff in public, bowling over Akaashi's boundaries about being touched and his general dislike for pda, ticking Akaashi off. It salves Bo's insecurity, so its hard to cut it out.

Its a wild thing to grapple with because otherwise you three have never been happier. There's so much love and affection to share. The sex is fantastic. But this rom-com haha funny misunderstanding has roots to deeper problems. You're scared to open that can of worms.

WOW THIS ASK IS SOOO INTERESTING IVE BEEN CHEWING ON IT FOR HOURS

really communications is the pitfall for all three of you!

[howlsofbloodhounds]

I was thinking about it this morning but I feel like Color almost certainly has some kind of migraine problem. Not just rom the damage to his skull but also as a result of having been in the void for so long. Especially if he's living in the OT,* with it's constant just ambient white light. Which come to think of it, would probably cause its own whole host of issues for him. The same kind of stagnate environment as his time in the void? A lack of day & night cycle / unchanging light levels; no real like 'nature' or natural structures? I feel like it could act as a trigger to his time in the void; even if they look different there could be enough points of comparison to be unpleasant... Which is why I both think it would make sense for him to live there but also I'm not sure if he would want to? Or if he'd want to find some timeline to settle down in? Somewhere where everything functions 'normally.' Plus, it's kind of funny to think about neighbour hood shenanigans with the Chromatic Crew xd Whoops. That uh, wasn't where I was going with this ask initially haha. Guess sometimes ideas just come as they do.

You and I are of the same mind here, I agree. I also think Color really hates feeling trapped or stuck, and he definitely hates feeling stagnant or unmoving in one place.

Which is why I firmly believe that despite Color’s need for some form of structure and routine, he needs to be moving physically—I do believe he’d struggle to actually put down roots in any one place for awhile.

He’s been trapped in place for what feels like forever, he doesn’t want to be stuck, he doesn’t want to waste time, he wants to live his life while he still can. It’s just he physically, mentally, emotionally, and psychologically would not be able to handle such change and new immediately off the bat.

Not after the predictably of the Void, despite how boring he might’ve also found it. It at least was familiar, and he knew at least what to expect.

Which is why I really don’t think that he’d be staying or living in the Omega Timeline by the time he’s decided he’s going to help Killer.

He’d stay in contact with his friends there of course, meet up with them when he can, but he’s either basically a nomad by the time he and Killer reach the point where Stage 1 actually asks Color to save him, or is becoming one immediately after.

Which I doubt was much of a suprise to Epic or Delta, they all might’ve sensed it was coming eventually, but i wouldn’t be surprised if this might’ve caused some big feelings on all parties—particularly if Delta, for example, expresses concerns that Color is uprooting his entire life for Killer.

I doubt it was an easy choice for Color either—he’d constantly worry about if Delta and Epic would forget about him if he’s not there, if they’d never call or text, and especially if Color feels like he’s abandoning them.

And in some part, I do think it might be necessary to stay on the move—not only to avoid being predictable and gaining Nightmare’s attention the more Color starts to become a problem for him, but to basically stay on Killer’s trail.

Because Nightmare is trafficking him, Killer will not be staying in one consistent spot, and it’s unlikely Color knows about or is able to gain access to Nightmare’s caste.

Which means Color and Killer will likely either only meet up or encounter eachother in person when Killer is actively working (especially if Color is fighting to defend this current AU Nightmare has Killer attacking), if they agree on places to meet up in private, or if Killer comes to or shows up at any temporary apartments Color is staying in. Everything else would likely be in coded communications or phone/text.

Which is also why I think Color would only go back to the Omega Timeline for longer is because—not only does he really miss his friends—but it’s mainly for Killer. He wants Killer to be safe, to protect him from Nightmare—and Nightmare isn’t supposed to have access to the Omega Timeline. He wants to give Killer the chance to heal, to have a home and to try and feel safe again.

Killer may be fine with the whole “him and color vs nightmare & the world”/“on the run” thing, but it’s ultimately unsafe and not beneficial in the long run.

Living in the Omega Timeline is a sacrifice Color is willing to make. At least until they’re all certain it’d be safe enough for them to leave and live elsewhere.

And he most definitely has painful migraines—brother gotta bring at least a bottle of painkillers or some BC with him wherever he does, especially so soon after escaping the Void.

[drdemonprince]

do you have any advice for navigating a friendship with a trans kids whose parent is transphobic? my uncle started dating this woman when her kid was 2 or 3, and then they broke up 8 or 9 years later. i consider this kid my cousin and xe has been an active part of my life through that whole time up until the break up just under three years ago. ive still been able to see xem occasionally but certainly with much less frequency. ive suspected for a few years now that xe is trans. xyr christmas gifts from me are almost always queer/trans books of some kind, and to be honest a lot of the reasons i show up in my family the way i do is so that a) xe can see a happy queer adult just being alive and b) to pave the way for xem to have a better experience with our family if/when xe chooses to come out. xe came out to only me a month or two ago and expressed a lot of gratitude to me for being there for xem. fast forward to today, xe is now saying xyr mom is uncomfortable with us texting and will be monitoring our texts. ive always known this was a possibility, and have followed xyr lead on what is and isnt safe to text about, and i stand by 100% of what ive texted xem. but i am really devastated by this news. xe is deleting our texts and i am not really sure how to navigate this because im sure there is a way for xyr mom to get deleted texts and i dont really want that to be like…an indicator of anything. and regardless, this is going to impact how much i can show up for xem. also this is like…just so obviously transphobic since i have known xyr mom, and known her WELL, for over a decade at this point. and shes had some pretty awful and bigoted and homophobic things to say in the past. im just really fucking sad about it to be honest and i dont really know how to navigate this in a way that preserves the relationship we do have, allows me to actually be myself, and lets me continue to have this kid as part of my life.

I think you gotta reframe this situation to make it less about how you get to still keep the kid in your life, and focus instead on what is gonna keep the kid safe. Right now, the kid being caught with any messages from you makes xem unsafe in an abusive, isolating home. My recommendation would be making yourself easy to find. Maybe even do some visible trans activism in the local community that everyone in the family will be able to know about. Make sure you have some kind of email or blog or social media page the kid could theoretically access at a better time. The kid should know where to find you when xe has a safer means of making contact. When xe gets a little bit older, then xe can begin to make decisions about potentially escaping this abusive environment and asking you for practical support, and the time may come when you can provide xem with a burner phone, some cash, or a place to crash. But for now you will have to tread really lightly so that the kid's mom doesn't escalate against xem.

[omghallucinations]

enhypen jake: that's enough slices!!!

two grand trines? like. two??? you need that much ease and luck??? girl could u give some of that to jay or sunghoon or ateez mingi? just a little bit of that easy-going-ness and optimism? life's a soup and i'm a soup spoon??? and like boy oh boy that fire trine and air trine really like. envelops his scorpio sun in fire wind.

jake has Layers. the top layer is fun fun cute adorable sparkly hugs. the bottom layer is vague existential wandering and desperate need to self-soothe with attention overthinking and the idea of Romance as he's trying to find out who he really is. :)

jake:

truly unprecedented amounts of luck and charm and easy communication and things just working out for him somehow

buoyant energy intelligence warmth generosity and optimism

kind of unpredictable in his reactions and weirdly unknowable in a way bc his life is a Journey to Become His Own Person and find peace and deal w his own Stuff internally (because tbh his subconscious goes crazy)

tendency to Fall In Deep Love with people in about 30 minutes, trust them too much want to merge every aspect of life but then he'll eject himself from the relationship out of fear 1 week later (also the ejection is always something like, oh i have to go tour, or something like that, never actually jake being like "let's break up bc i'm not feeling this"--very libra mars of him, he might not even realize it is him who is orchestrating it all and just be like "oh i have such bad luck" lol)

on the contrary he has so much luck i'm a little worried that he won't ultimately face up to The Shit (a scorpio sun's calling)

let's all thank mars and saturn for saving jake's grand trines from the lazy allegations

trine town baby

ok these are our trines--those big triangles. there are grand trines because they make the whole triangle instead of part of it. the yellow is his air trine red is his fire trine.

jake came into the world with a ton of luck--access to money, access to good education, access to opportunities, super likable and charming. this does not mean he always had it easy tho his moon and sun have some pretty clear "felt rejection as a kid" aspects. but still as he grew up he could "get away" with stuff, like he may have snuck out one night or left expensive shit somewhere it could get taken, whatever, but things would always pan out for him anyway.

i see all the time like ah a trine is a "good" aspect, unlike a square which is a "bad" aspect and tbh i disagree. every aspect has pros and cons man! they also change so much depending on the planets involved! but generally...

trine pros: ease, enjoyment, ability, talent, everything flows naturally, luck, aspects of your personality and upbringing etc merge together well trine cons: can be complacent, don't really take initiative to improve beyond their natural talents without the influence of squares or other factors?, potential to ignore problems or tolerate things just bc it's easier and other things are going well for them

when mars or saturn is in a grand trine you're more likely to get shit done than if they aren't. jake's air trine is not um. complacent at all

jake's fire trine... it's very fun and adorable and full of life!!! but that's where he can let things go more than he probably should

trines can also kind of be compulsive--jake's fire trine shows his desperate DESPERATE NEED for attention and action and creativity and his air trine shows how he NEEDS to talk and communicate and learn to be alive. but because nothing is forcing him to change any unhealthy habits, he often... doesn't, lmao. he is ambitious but can be a little bit too easy-going on the day-to-day, and he doesn't always... look at his compulsions in the face?

grand fire trine: clap!! clap!!!!

jake is SO warm you can feel the warmth!! see it!! he radiates it!! a little campfire!! so sweet and charming! a fire trine in fire houses!! fire houses are about being and becoming, which as a leo rising is his whole deal!

however he does not know how to plan, look before he leaps, or actually take purposeful initiative as much as you might assume. a square is do-do-do, a fire trine is here to party and enjoy themselves.

his grand fire trine gives him this unshakable optimism about life--on a deep level jake truly feels like everything will work out. he may worry in the moment, but he is able to take these risks because he can feel the way life is pushing him forward--the forces that help him along (heyyy jupiter in the first house). he takes big risks and people might be like, wow so brave!! however he genuinely doesn't really realize something could go wrong lmao. it does not occur to him. why would something bad happen???

his fire trine does have like. almost an awkward vibe with some of the planets? all of them do not necessarily mesh. the element, they are united. the planets themselves...

jupiter: wants to fly the nest and experience life and be free

pluto: deep intense need for safety and caution, wants to dig everything up and start over, wants power to protect itself

moon: on pluto's side mostly, because she also wants emotional security in such a big way

jupiter and pluto are like "hmmmm... idk about you...." to each other, and pluto can really intensify the moon's needs. jupiter softens this a little bit and makes it more cute and fun and less AHHH I NEED ATTENTION RIGHT NOW OR I WILL DIE. CLAP!! CLAP!!!

although... that is also very much a factor. i cannot lie here. he really, really needs applause to feel emotionally safe.

here are the players:

jupiter in leo in his first house (17)--there's this really optimistic sweetness and innocence about jake and he is so fun to be around. he does have a charmingly me-me-me-ness but that honestly doesn't come from a self-centered place, he just can't help it (he has a lot of empathy too bro he just also relates things to his own experiences!). he's a leo rising with jupiter in the 1st dude what do you expect? he's a star!! he is the moment!! he can't help it that he's popular!! anyway he radiates this really pure and good-natured and generous aura

pluto in sagittarius in the 5th house (16) -- he needs attention SO BAD, dude. SO BAD. he will die if people are not paying attention to him. lack of attention genuinely feels unsafe. he needs to be creative, and perform, and express. especially with his leo rising/leo jupiter in the 1st, he probably was someone venerated (royalty??? idk) in a past life and subconsciously is like i need the same amount of attention and feedback or i do not exist. jake is awesome to work with if he's on your side. if he isn't. look out. (pluto widely conjunct his south node here also shows that the past life pull here is Strong)

moon (3) and lilith (13) in aries in the 9th house: the moon is most important because that's a real planet, followed by lilith, who is also part of the moon so. the 9th is a searching, traveling, sagittarius house--jake feels safe when he's experiencing new things, learning new things, going new places, traveling. with lilith in aries he um. maybe thinks other people are taking the lead and doesn't notice how much he is actually the one taking the lead or making things go his way? lmao?

in a trine, all the energies get each other. they have similar priorities. that vein is strong. jake wants

- to shine - excitement - to Find Himself and Express Himself - he does not want to think about consequences or anything too heavy

the more exact an aspect, the stronger it gets, so jupiter/pluto is extra strong. they may not totally see eye-to-eye but they both know they want/need more and they want/need attention and creative control. jake has so much creative energy and interest and ability at his fingertips all the time and with jupiter involved, it can really have a big impact.

air grand trine: knows a little (a medium) about a lot

a fire trine in fire houses and an air trine possibly in air houses are u kidding me.

jake loves learning, but in a very chill way. he doesn't feel like he has to compete all the time, this is not compensation, he just naturally gets things and is interested in things. he feels super confident and comfortable in learning situations and environments, he feels very comfy communicating, he's super curious, he likes chatty and stimulating environments. he probably did well in school without much angst about it.

the air element is very bounce bounce bounce very fun fun fun but the planets in jake's air grand trine are.... not very bounce bounce bounce not very fun fun fun :(

mars (medium fun fun fun)

uranus (... depends on ur idea of fun fun fun)

saturn (not fun fun fun at all)

mars is in detriment in libra (passy aggy libra is not aggy aggy mars's comfortable vibe)

saturn is in its fall in gemini (saturn wants everyone to grow up and make good choices and gemini... does not... want that... .... )

uranus is at home in aquarius so she's chillin.

libra aquarius and gemini are all vibing like crazy. the planets... are... um... well they are all very a Lot.

their conversation is more like

libra mars in the 3rd: the best way to survive and thrive is to make sure everyone is having a good time, man. keep the peace. keep it chill. keep it fun keep it flirty. if i want a fight i'm going to provoke you into it and then i'll be like omg why would you fight me, now i have no choice but to end u, omg

aquarius uranus in the 7th: where is my weird significant other i ghosted the other day it's back on baby (all relationships are full of change but also the way i'm learning about myself too!! let's get super deep and then never talk to each other again!! or maybe we will?? i am super comfortable with the way things change idk! change is part of life!!) OR aquarius uranus in the 8th: hahahahahahaha i try to control my emotionally compulsive tendencies and sate them by acquiring weird power and exploring weird shit but somehow they always come roaring back hahahaha maybe it'll work this time tho

saturn gemini in the 11th: i want to be friends with everybody but also keep to myself COMPLETELY. i wanna chitty chatty everywhere and also.... only talk to people i work with? i have six friends and that is enough for me man. also i feel like... existential... ? i have so many Thoughts and Philosophies? i feel paralyzed by The Ideas and Science of Humanity sometimes??? or saturn in gemini in the 12th: ... hahah.... ... ever feel... some kind of unsubstantiated judgement from the like... universe?? haha... i am so overwhelmed by the concept of saturn (maturation, judgement, work, etc) it's like a gaping hole ha ha??? i mean on the bright side i can really make my imaginative and interesting ideas reality and have them relate to humanity tho bro

basically jake has an incredible talent for air sign stuff but um. uranus and saturn are like... ever heard of intellectualizing ur emotions? ever feel... a void? you might want to fill by exploring your own psyche and being of service to others?

mars bequeaths Action and Energy on his trine-mates, so jake has a real ability to Work Work Work, and break the mould but in a harmonious way, a way that doesn't freak people out. uranus is also a very Thinky Thinky planet so it's also action and intellect, handshake emoji.

some tremendous gifts!!! now let's look at some... . other things...

4th house placements: hello it's me, ghosts from your unconscious

here's what we know about jake's possible subconscious Stuff so far

sort of a past life royalty thing, there's a sense of needing special treatment in some ways bc that's normal to him

needs to perform or he feels he will die

Over-intellectualize, Profit

puts up this situations that he doesn't love bc everything else is going well for him and he's like, this is fine

4th house and scorpio are both very karmic bro. it's like, any signature here means you are gonna spend time Finding Yourself and Dismantling Subconscious Complexes. scorpio is constantly like, omg should i break from the chains of my past and transform??? no no no instead I should cling to the bones of my compulsive desires. wait unless...

water houses are like "i am full of memory... of the emotional ghosts of the past!" anyone with these placements is gonna have to do some exorcisms of the subconscious and jake is one of these!

his chart ruler the sun conjunct mercury is in scorpio in the 4th house, as is his venus at 0 degrees (more later)--he has a real deep deep yearning for safety and security and nurturing. he needs to be nurtured and to nurture. he also um. he needs to detach himself from the things he like unthinkingly accepts that he learned from his family. on some level he truly is struggling for recognition and acceptance--but tbh this is mostly his own stuff he'll have to untangle bc people really like him. this will all get easier when he's older.

it Loooooks like... his family really prioritized things looking nice and looking good and not um... emotional... nurturing? or parts of his upbringing were good and positive, but he did feel some kind of rejection from his parental figures (sun square uranus and jupiter/moon square chiron and saturn) that has led to some emotional rigidity/fear (moon aspects) and ummMM recklessness??? (sun aspects).

scorpio venus at 0°: uh oh i am also retrograde and in detriment do you want to get married

normally a planet at 0° explodes the sign energy in a very obvious way, but venus is (a) retrograde and (b) in detriment in scorpio so that's not exactly how it manifests. we're boosting venus the planet and some parts of scorpio, baby, including the ability to radiate sexuality! we're boosting Making Mistakes and taking A While to get things right!!

he probably struggles in relationships a bit right now. with his 7th house aquarius uranus and neptune he likely has no idea what he really wants at this point in his life--neptune, also opposite his ascendant, keeps things really foggy--and feels an intense need to get oUUTTT when he feels trapped. he has a lot of positive indicators for a stable relationship later in life but he really is gonna have to sort through those intense unconscious things before he can really be truly open with someone else.

neptune conjunct his descendant and his 0° scorpio venus show this intense romanticism that doesn't always like... align with reality. aquarius neptune loves the idea of people/a relationship--and scorpio venus loves the kdrama of a relationship. i miss fighting and kissing in the rain ass. his scorpio venus wants to merge deeply with another and his neptune conjunct descendant does not... do... boundaries... at all. so this can be a problem.

hahaha jake do you find the love of your life on instagram twice a month and then not say or do a single thing and then see something in their story that makes you be like "nah" as a defense mechanism? bud.

libra mars conjunct IC: angy but so buried nobody knows

mars conjunct IC (the line on the bottom of the MC) is already like "lots of anger, HIDES IT FROM EVERYONE" and libra mars is that x a million. libra is such a hilarious sign bro. "ladies do not start fights but they can finish them" but also ladies do not start fights overtly, they just set up the dominos in such a way their chosen opponent will start the fight themselves. with mars in the 3rd it's super gemini super fun also, libra in a gemini house, very chatty very communication. less dark than mars in the 4th lmao.

your IC is at the bottom of your chart--so people don't see this about him and jake does not value this about himself, but jake can tap into mars (and his air grand trine also) as foundation or fuel.

jake has this incredibly boiling reserve of energy and life force and anger--

in libra it could be anger at injustice

and/or passy aggy kind of anger from repressing his own needs and letting people walk over him sometimes

and/or sometimes it's also about a family situation, his 3rd house shows a super mentally active family environment and libra IC/scorpio 4th shows that maybe some things were not... spoken about....

either way jake has insane amounts of willpower lowkey--even if he lets a lot of things go day-to-day, ultimately he's gonna get what he wants (but in a cutesy and demure way so it doesn't look like jake is pushing for it).

because mars is in detriment in libra, this foundation can feel really confusing and weird. jake probably seems really excessively tolerant of everything even if he's actually not and he really wants things to be fair and gets pissy if they aren't.

round up!!

for his big players...

jake is a jupiter lad bro. jupiter loves this kid

sun!! his chart ruler and his deepest self. i feel like repressing your sun makes the sun more powerful lmao and players #3 and #4 really are doing their best to hide her

fire trine (pluto/moon/jupiter)

air trine (mars/uranus/saturn)

mars conjunct ic oof

whatever the hell is up with neptune and venus

u know i was more worried about him avoiding his scorpionic Issues when i first looked at his chart, but now i'm like... yeah life is gonna bring those issues to you to deal with babe don't worry.

but aww this kid is so cute dude. don't get me wrong he has a lot of past life baggage and shit but he's genuinely a cutie. snaps for jake, everybody.

[theresstillgrowinghere]

I don’t often find I have much to say during chronic illness awareness months anymore. I’m tired. My words feel tired. I don’t feel like I have anything new to add. Sometimes I worry though that that in part comes from my having been in various digital chronic illness spaces for almost a decade. Of course it feels tired to me. There are things that rattle around my brain that feel so obvious and commonplace (and that have been said much more eloquently by others before me) but may still be worth expressing, just judging by the ways people in my life haven’t been able to understand

So for gastroparesis awareness month this year, there are a few things I want to note from my experiences (tw for food/eating, weight without numbers, medical trauma)

1) My relationship with food is so scarred and multifaceted. It is messy and thorny, conflicting and complicated

(I am scared of food. I miss food. I hate food. I want to eat so badly. I never want to think about eating again. Tell me in detail about how it tasted. I love food. Please don’t ask me to join you for a meal. I don’t want to miss the communal aspects of eating. I feel so disconnected and other and separate just because I don’t eat. Sometimes I do try to eat and it makes me sick. Don’t comment on it, please; it’s not helpful to scold or encourage - I feel shame either way)

2) There is no cure. There is only management. I think people understand this in theory more than actuality, because when I say this I mean please, please stop expecting any management option to be The Thing. Please don’t expect something to offer substantial improvement, even if it is a life-saving dramatic change. As I have tried to explain to people in my life, those types of interventions are often complicated and risky and, in our broken healthcare system, very difficult to access until the situation truly is dire and life-threatening. Which can mean that the body takes significant damage before getting there. Sometimes by the time you access the intervention, that damage is irreversible and the goal is just to stop further decline. It’s not making me better; it’s keeping me from getting worse. For some reason that’s difficult for people to understand

(But sometimes people do find what for them is The Thing or are The Things, and that’s an important piece of the whole picture. The problem is the persistence of unrealistic expectations among people around us)

3) My relationship with healthcare is vital but fraught and heavy. I rely on it tremendously just to stay alive. It is also my only in-person access to the world and to people, which is a weird kind of mindfuck. But I am also deeply afraid of it after so many years of trauma. I am terrified of hospitals and medical professionals. I’m sorry for the way that fear makes me irrational, makes me assume, makes me protect myself. I know so many medical professionals are so caring and kind, but it is very, very hard to go into a medical setting trusting that that will be the case

4) There are some things I wish truly were obvious. Like don’t comment on someone’s weight, ever. Don’t say you wish you could “have a little of that” to change your appearance. Don’t try to convince me to “just try to eat a little.” Trust that I know my body best. Don’t offer me unsolicited advice or recommendations. Don’t say “when you get to be my age…” because I will point out that, based on the amount of damage to my body already, it is very possible I will never reach your age. But more to the point, I am not too young to be this sick. It happens

Anyway, these are my 3am-notes-app, camped-out-on-the-bathroom-floor thoughts. It is also important to note that they exist in the context of my gastroparesis being born of and coexisting with my other chronic illnesses, and they all become so deeply entangled

Wishing everyone well. Hoping your August is kind and gentle

To everyone with gastroparesis (and other digestive disorders, really), I’m sorry your tummy hurts, and no, you actually don’t need to be very brave about it. As I heard someone say recently in a different context but definitely applies here as well, “We weren’t born to be fighters. I don’t want to be brave. I want to be okay.” I just want all of us to be okay