#so i tried asking around for anyone to borrow their phone but nobody had a working call function...

[mishkakagehishka]

Why do i always dream the most ridiculous shit when i take naps

[roosterforme]

The Younger Kind Part 10 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: You and Bradley have chemistry in spades, and you doubt anyone else could make you feel this good. Bradley is more than willing to beg for you, and you're more than willing to let him. But a phone call in the afterglow leaves you hoping you're enough for them and wondering how anyone could ever pass up being with Bradley and Noah.

Warnings: Smut, angst, swearing, fluff, and age gap (18+)

Length: 3600 words

Pairing: Single dad!Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x babysitter!female reader

Check out my masterlist for more!

You and Bradley had been teasing each other all night, both physically and verbally. Nobody else could turn you on like this with their words. Nobody else even came close.

The banter was so sexy. You wondered if he felt this way when he went out with women he met on the app. Right from the start, you had noticed that the two of you seemed to click, and it had only gotten better over the past few weeks. When he wasn't pissing you off, of course.

You were soaking wet, no doubt getting his lounge pants messy through the lace thong you were wearing. He wasn't even touching you right now, and you were on the verge of moaning for him. When you hand fed him two of your four Skittles, you quickly ate the other two to keep your mouth otherwise occupied.

But, oh, he seemed to be following the same set of instructions that you were. Thank goodness.

"Come here, Princess," Bradley growled, wrapping his hands around your waist and pulling your body against him. His naked torso was muscular and warm, and you ran your fingers across his shoulders as he said, "Tell me what you want."

He made you feel bold. You dragged the tip of your tongue along Bradley's lips and whispered, "I want you, Daddy."

Without fail, that possessive look returned to his brown eyes. Something profound happened to this man when you called him Daddy, and you never wanted it to stop.

"I think about you all the damn time," he whispered, kissing you softly on the lips while his fingers dug into your lower back. He was hard in his sweatpants where you rubbed yourself gently against him. Your eyes drifted closed as his lips found your neck.

"Oh," you gasped, your fingers tangling in his messy hair as you pressed closer against him. His coarse mustache and soft lips felt so good, you thought you might float away. You tried to open your eyes and focus on him, tried to ground yourself before you became a needy mess, but you couldn't. 

He was everywhere. Everything smelled like him, and you briefly wondered if it was his shampoo or detergent or something else. Then his hands on your waist were moving up, taking the borrowed shirt with them, exposing your belly where he splayed on big hand. 

"Mmm, Princess," he mumbled, working his lips along your jaw and chin while his thumb toyed with the top of his lounge pants that you had rolled at the waist. He was giving you so much unhurried pleasure, just like Wednesday night when he ate your pussy. 

"Bradley." He was so good at his, so much older than you. You had been with guys before, but he was the first man you'd had. You didn't want to go back. He was sucking on your neck as his fingers dipped an inch or two into the front of your pants, stroking you with his knuckles. It was heavenly.

"What do you want Daddy to do to you?" he asked, and you moaned so loudly, he was pressing his lips to yours immediately. You wrapped your hands around the back of his neck, playing with his hair while you rubbed yourself back and forth on his thigh. He kept mashing his lips to yours, still pushing you back against the wall. Every time he relented to take a breath, you sucked in some air as well, because you were fully at his mercy now. 

Bradley groaned next to your ear, and you clenched around nothing. "You gonna tell me, baby?" he asked, guiding you away from the wall on your unsteady feet. "Or you gonna make me beg?"

You looked up at him, his brown eyes dark and demanding in the soft lamp light as you stroked his neck. He was waiting for your answer, his fingers ghosting along your waist and his warm breath on your face. You pressed your lips together, trying to clear your head as you softly asked him, "You'd beg for me?"

Bradley closed his eyes and grunted your first name. When he opened them again, you whined as he stroked your cheek so gently with his rough fingertips. "Of course. You're a Princess," he reminded you as he sank to his knees before you, kissing his way down your body. He guided you close so the soft skin below your belly button was rubbing against his mustache while you grabbed at his wavy hair. 

You gasped through parted lips while he kissed you everywhere he could. When he untied the little knot in the shirt you were wearing, you pulled it up over your head and tossed it aside. Bradley looked up at you while his lips and tongue teased along your belly. "You're so fucking perfect," he whispered, reaching up to drag his knuckles across your lace bra. 

"Bradley!" you gasped, bucking yourself against him at the jolt of pleasure you felt. 

"Let me taste you again, please," he begged, and when you started pulling down the lounge pants, his steady hands were there to help. "Oh, fuck, baby." As soon as the pants were down to your thighs, his lips and tongue were tasting you through your underwear. When you managed to step out of the pants and awkwardly kick them aside, you felt his tongue dip inside the elastic and swipe through your wetness.

"Oh, god," you moaned. "Nobody ever did that to me before. What you did the other night!"

Bradley looked up at you, clearly so pleased with himself as he started yanking down your thong until he could run his nose up your slit and kiss you. "Nobody ever made you squirt before?"

You swallowed hard. "Nobody ever went down on me before."

His parted lips paused on your pussy, and he asked, "I'm the only one who's ever tasted you like this? This perfect pussy?"

You nodded slowly, filled with so much need for him. "Yeah, Daddy."

In one swift motion, Bradley pulled you down by your hips as you squeaked, and he eased himself onto his back on the living room floor with you on top of him. You straddled his waist, rubbing our bare core against his abs while he pulled you down for a kiss. "You taste that, Princess?" he asked, spreading your wetness over your own lips with his mustache. "That's how sweet you are." When you just moaned and kissed the scars on his neck in response, he whispered, "Only I know that. Only I know how soft you feel when I put my tongue right here." You felt his fingers slip inside you and bend forward, hitting you where it made you want to scream for him.

"Bradley, please!"

"I thought I was the one begging, baby," he groaned, slanting his lips across yours and unhooking your bra with his free hand. It was in the way, everything was in the way, so you tossed it onto the couch. You wanted to feel all of him against you and inside you. 

He rolled you smoothly onto your back, attaching his pretty lips to your nipple and watching your face while he sucked on you. Without much finesse, you used your feet to push his sweatpants down, gasping when his cock sprang free from the fabric. Then you wrapped your right leg around his waist and guided him closer until his erection was nestled between your pussy lips, his weeping tip rubbing your clit just right. 

"Oh fuck," you hiccupped as he kissed his way from one nipple to the other, whispering praise against your skin. Then he kissed his way down your body until his mouth was on your pussy with your legs spread wide for him. He licked you so well, all you could do was shake your head from side to side next to the snag in the area rug. Any other guy would have already fucked you, cum and been done by now. But this was amazing. You were getting treated to exactly what every woman on that dating app was hoping for when they looked at Bradley.

The rub of his mustache and his fingers stroking inside you brought you close to the edge as you watched Bradley struggle out of his sweatpants. And then he was naked and his lips were on your inner thigh as he met your eyes. 

"Please, Princess. Please," he begged. "Let me fuck you." 

You moaned in response, clenching softly around his fingers. You were so close now, but you wanted his cock to fill you up. You wiggled yourself up against him and said,  "Bradley. I want you inside me. Fuck me."

-------------------------

He would gladly beg for you all night. He could tell you liked it when he did, and he had no problem indulging in his need for you. Hell, he could probably get off to it himself.

"Bradley. I want you inside me. Fuck me." His cock was throbbing as he looked down at your young, perfect body, spread out for him on his living room floor. You were all smooth skin and peaked nipples and needy noises. You seemed to have no control over the beautiful way your body was reacting to him, keening as he gently pressed his body weight down on top of you. 

And then he was kissing your lips, letting you taste yourself again as he pushed his tip inside you, stretching you as he went deeper. You lower back arched off the floor as he bottomed out in the tightest, sweetest pussy he'd ever felt. 

"God damn," he groaned against your lips as you whined louder for him. He needed you. God, you were perfect. He was thrusting. He couldn't stop. He'd be a fucking idiot to think he'd ever be able to stop begging for you now. "Does that feel good for you, Princess?"

"Daddy," you whimpered, grasping onto strands of his hair as he kissed you all over your neck and face. "I'm gonna cum." He knew he was big, and he knew he got you close with his mouth, but this was incredible. 

He made sure his thrusts were deep and steady, taking shallow breaths against your neck as you cried out. You were loud. Even louder than you had been when you squirted for him. Your pussy was squeezing his cock as your broken cry filled his ears, and he wasn't going to last long now either. Not after going a year without sex. Not inside you.

You arched your chest up into his palm as you rode out your pleasure, and Bradley sucked on your tits to keep you making those little sounds he was becoming addicted to. Your eyes were hazy and fucked out now as you looked up at him like he had just single handedly solved every mystery known to mankind. You whispered his name through those perfect lips as your soft hands skimmed along his shoulders and neck.

And then as he pressed his lips to yours, he felt his spine tingle, and he released a deep moan into your mouth. You nibbled encouragingly on his lips as he picked up his pace, and when he was buried deep inside you, he paused. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!" he gasped, pushing himself impossibly deeper as he watched your face while you whined his name. He came so hard, he was seeing stars, and he knew he needed more of you. 

Bradley buried his face in your neck, inhaling your scent while he grew soft inside you. The way you were stroking your fingers languidly through his hair and along his neck made him feel like this was something he wanted to do with you so often that it all felt familiar and necessary.

"Princess," he groaned, his mustache rubbing your earlobe. "Baby." He felt your pussy pulse around him at his words, and he wanted to own you. He wanted you to own him. 

You kissed his jaw as he grunted and pulled his cock slowly out of your pussy. As he knelt between your thighs, stroking your hip and catching his breath, Bradley watched his cum drip out of you and onto his living room area rug. "So pretty," he mumbled, making eye contact with you. 

And then his eyes went wide. "Princess. We didn't use a condom."

You looked at him with a soft, pleased expression. "Hmm?"

He leaned down and kissed your cheek, feeling a little panicked. "Baby, we didn't use a condom. I don't think I even have any here."

You just giggled and wrapped your arms around his neck. "You've been going on a bunch of dates, and you didn't get condoms?"

He shook his head, heart pounding. "No. I was distracted by you. Just like I clearly was once again, because I didn't even think about protection just now." 

"I'm on the pill," you whispered. "And I like distracting you."

Bradley sighed in relief. "You're very good at it," he said, running his nose along your neck and kissing you. He listened to your soft sighs as you dragged your hands through his hair. But in all honesty, Bradley found it hard to think rationally around you, and that was not a good thing. 

He paused with his lips on your collarbone and breathed you in. This was a bad idea. He shouldn't have you here with him like this. He shouldn't have fucked you. But as you wrapped your smooth calf around the back of his thigh and rubbed your leg along his, Bradley was once again having a hard time thinking.

He groaned. "Princess, this is such a bad idea. We should stop." But he was kissing your lips again before he finished his last sentence. You hummed against his mouth, and whether you were agreeing or disagreeing, Bradley couldn't make himself stop. "I'm too old for you, Princess."

"You kept up just fine," you whispered, and Bradley was addicted to the look on your face. Then his phone, which had come loose from the pocket of his sweatpants, was vibrating on the rug next to your elbow. He didn't have to look at the screen to know who was calling him, but you propped yourself up and then looked him in the eyes.

"Who's Meredith? And why is she calling you so late?" There was a little crease between your eyebrows, and Bradley tried to kiss it away, but you pulled back a few inches. "Is she the woman you cancelled your date with?"

"I can explain," he said, which was clearly the wrong thing to say, because you were scooting away from him now and scrambling for your underwear. "Princess. Meredith is Noah's mom."

You paused with that sinful little thong halfway up your legs and met his eyes again. "Why is she calling you?" Bradley watched you shimmy the underwear on, and then you were looking for your bra which ended up by the couch. 

You were tugging his shirt back on as Bradley reached for you. "Princess, come here," he whispered, and even though you looked hesitant, you let Bradley pull you against him. He pulled you on top of him as he leaned back on the floor. With your chin propped on his chest, he wrapped his arms around you and said, "Meredith always starts calling every year around Noah's birthday."

"When's Noah's birthday?" you asked, and Bradley told you the date when his son would turn four as he ran his fingers inside the shirt and along your bare back. 

"But why is she calling?" You looked puzzled. "Does she live local and want to see him?"

Bradley was silent for a beat. He hadn't told you much about his ex. Truthfully, it hurt him to talk about her. Not because of what she did to Bradley, but because of what she did to their son. "Noah doesn't even know who Meredith is," Bradley whispered. "She lives in Oceanside. She calls around his birthday every year, threatens to fight for sole custody, makes my life a living hell, and then disappears."

You pressed your lips together and looked at him curiously as he propped one arm behind his head and held your waist with the other. "Did you kick her out? Was she doing something that could hurt Noah?"

Bradley shook his head. "No. She left us."

Your eyes went wide with surprise. "She left?"

"Yeah, she just didn't come home after work one day. Noah was three months old. His daycare was calling and calling, but I was flying at the time. Thank god I wasn't deployed."

"Were you married?" you asked softly. When Bradley shook his head, you added, "Do you think you would have been? If she didn't leave?"

Bradley shrugged and closed his eyes, trying to picture what his life would have been like. "I think I was always the more responsible one. I owned the house. I saved my money. I wanted Noah, even though he wasn't planned. I don't think Meredith and I would have ever reached the point of marriage, no."

You eased yourself off of Bradley's body and sat up on your knees. You were looking down at him, lying naked on the floor in front of you. "She never wanted Noah?" you asked, and you looked so sad.

"She was excited when she was pregnant, but I think when she realized how hard it really was, she was done. Meredith is impulsive. She's a business developer, and having an infant was negatively impacting her career."

"So she left." 

"Yeah," Bradley confirmed for the second time. Your small hand came to rest on his abs, your fingers stroking him absentmindedly as you gaped at him.

"She was living here? In your perfect house, with you? And Noah? And she left? She sounds like a fucking idiot!"

Bradley laughed humorlessly. "Yeah. She showed her true colors, I guess." 

"She had it all," you whispered so softly, Bradley barely heard you. He pulled you back down against him, and you settled with your lips on his. 

After a few sweet kisses, you pulled away an inch, and Bradley said, "You know the expression, one man's trash is another man's treasure."

"Don't call Noah trash," you scolded, grabbing him by the chin and then smiling. "You, I'm still not sure about, but he's practically perfect."

Bradley smiled as you kissed him. "Yeah, I'm not sure how I managed that."

"You probably just got lucky," you whispered, and your lips brushed against his mustache, making him feel crazy.

"I certainly got lucky tonight," he moaned, and you laughed and tried to wriggle out of his arms. But he held you and took your hand in his. "Stay over?" he asked cautiously. He really wanted to wake up with you tomorrow morning. Somehow he knew that nothing else would feel quite as good as waking up in his bed with you in his arms, your taste on his tongue and your scent on his pillow.

You froze and looked at him in surprise. "I already slept here once. It's probably not a good idea for Noah to think that's going to be a normal routine, unless..."

Bradley didn't think he would mind if it was an everyday activity, but he could understand where you were coming from. "Right. Good point, Princess."

"My clothes are in your room," you whispered as you got up, and then Bradley stood next to you completely naked. You looked longingly at him as he pulled on his sweatpants, and then you gathered up your bra and the paper crowns and made your way down the hallway to his room. He wanted to follow you, wanted to call after you and tell you to get in his bed and let him make you feel good again. 

Instead he stood in the living room, looking at the spot where his cum had soaked into the area rug when it dribbled out of you. He groaned with need, and told himself he'd clean that up after you left. Then you reappeared in the clothing you had arrived in, and he wanted more than anything to get you back in his clothes. 

"Thanks for coming over tonight," Bradley told you, caressing your cheek with his knuckles as your eyes fluttered closed. 

"I had fun," you replied. "And I'm happy you cancelled your date." 

Bradley was about to ask you if this had been a date, because he really wasn't sure. He wasn't sure what came next, other than the fact that he knew he wanted you. 

"Will you text me when you get home?" he asked, brushing his lips against yours. 

"Yeah." And then your arms were around his neck. He practically carried you out to his driveway as you laughed. And when you pulled away in your car, he knew he should have told you that tonight meant something to him. 

He counted up all of the texts and calls from Meredith and cleaned his carpet. When he was walking to his bedroom, his phone lit up and he cringed, but it was a text from you.

Babysitter: I made it home. Good night, Bradley.

He wrote back, telling you to have sweet dreams. Then he looked at his green crown and Noah's yellow crown on his dresser. But yours was back on his bedpost. 

---------------------------

You better beg for your Princess! Enjoy your babysitter fic which you help me write, @beyondthesefourwalls And thank you @mak-32

PART11

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[nyoomfruits]

54 for omegaverse please and thank

54. "P-please scent me, I don't want to smell like them, I want to smell like you..."

It starts innocent enough, Lando popping his head around the door of Oscar’s driver’s room somewhere between press responsibilities on Thursday. “Hey,” he says, glancing at where Oscar is sprawled over the couch, scrolling through his phone. “Can you scent me?”

Oscar raises an eyebrow. They’ve been teammates for a while now, long enough for Oscar to know Lando’s nose is sensitive. He particular, about who and what he does and doesn’t smell like. Borrows hoodies from friends and family to be wrapped up in their scent, gets antsy when things smell wrong.

So this. This means Oscar… His inner Alpha, the one that’s been screaming mine mine mine ever since he first laid eyes on Lando, rumbles happily. Oscar firmly tells it to shut the fuck up and turns to Lando, reassuring smile on his face, determined not to make this weird. Lando wouldn’t ask him if he wasn’t feeling uncomfortable, so.

“Sure,” he says. “Get over here.”

Lando makes a happy noise and instead of waiting for Oscar to get up so they can do the whole cheek rubbing, neck nosing thing that’s normal between friends, flops down square on top of Oscar and snuggles in.

“Oof,” Oscar wheezes out, when Lando’s elbow ends up somewhere in his abdomen. “Okay.”

“Hm,” Lando says, shoves his nose into Oscar’s neck. Oscar stares up at the ceiling, tries to think of Normal and Sane things that aren’t his teammate currently lounging on his chest, fitting into his arms like a puzzle piece sliding into place.

After about five minutes of Oscar trying to name every single part of the MCL60 in his head and not thinking about shoving his nose into Lando’s soft curls and taking in his chocolate cookie sweet scent, Lando lets out a happy noise and gets up again. “Thanks, mate,” he says, and then disappears before Oscar can utter as much as a ‘No problem’.

--

It happens again, after that. And again. Lando has clearly added Oscar to his roster of ‘People Who Smell Good’, and makes grateful use of the fact that Oscar is just around, like. All the time. It reaches a point where Lando just follows Oscar into his driver’s room between obligations, sprawls all over his couch, steals his hoodies.

Like he belongs.

And that’s. That’s when it starts becoming a problem. Because the more and more Lando inserts himself into Oscar’s space, the more Oscar’s stupid instincts scream at him that he’s his, that he belongs to Oscar, that he is his Omega. Which is stupid, because Lando doesn’t belong to anyone. Least of all Oscar.

The moment Oscar realizes he’s gotten in way over his head is when him and Lando make it onto another podium, and when Max gives Lando a congratulatory handshake, Oscar actually growls at him.

Nobody catches it, over the sound of the celebrations and the general F1 post-race ruckus, but Oscar realizes that if he doesn’t put a stop to this now it’s only going to get worse and that isn’t fair to anyone. Not to Lando, not to any Alpha that comes close to Lando, not to himself.

He doesn’t tell Lando, doesn’t know how to explain without putting his heart on the table and making it gratingly awkward for everyone involved, and so he keeps quiet, pulls away bit by bit, slowly disappearing back into the shadows he existed in before Lando put him in the spotlight.

Lando, for the most part, lets him. Frowns, when Oscar closes the door to his driver’s room before Lando can follow, when Oscar moves away from his touch. But he doesn’t say anything, seems to accept the distance Oscar is trying to create. Doesn’t push.

It hurts, only a little bit. Oscar had fooled himself, at one point, that maybe it meant something, to Lando. But the way he lets Oscar pull away so easily…

Oscar puts his head down, focuses on the car. He’s here to race after all.

--

The whole weekend has been shit. Qualifying was garbage for the both of them, and then there’s a sprint on Saturday that goes completely tits up, too. Lando ends up in the gravel somewhere halfway, and Oscar watches the screens, watches him climb out of the car, sulk back to the garage.

Lando gets subjected to a million interviews that all ask him the same questions, and Oscar can see the exhaustion on his face, from his end of the media pen. Something in him wants to reach out, pull Lando close, shade him from the rest of the world. He pushes that something down, and answers the fifteenth question about how they’re expecting the race tomorrow to go now the car seems so spectacularly shit this weekend.

He doesn’t expect there to be a knock on his hotel room door later that night, revealing Lando in all his jittery, exhausted glory. “Oscar,” he says, mouth tight and eyes downcast. He looks so small, and Oscar’s Alpha whines at the sight. “Oscar please. I know I’ve been asking way too much, making you all uncomfortable but please, please scent me. I don’t, I don’t want to smell like them, I want to smell like you.”

Oscar wants to give in immediately. Pull him close, press his nose into Lando’s scent gland. Take off his clothes, because skin to skin scenting is always better. Wants to cover him until Lando smells like nothing but Oscar, so everyone else can smell who he belongs to. But that’s not. He needs answers first. So he restrains himself, tries to keep his face neutral as he says. “Why me?”

Lando makes a frustrated little noise. “Don’t. Don’t be mean, Oscar. You know. You know why.”

“I really don’t,” Oscar says, genuinely confused.

“But,” Lando says, “You pulled away. Because you realized I was in love with you. That’s why… You needed space.”

Oscar blinks. Tries to process fifteen things all at once and comes up completely blank. “I needed space because I realized I was in love with you,” he says, a little dumbfounded.

Lando frowns. “Why would you need space, then?”

“I, because I didn’t think you wanted me?”

“Well, that’s stupid,” Lando says, frown deepening. “Of course I want you. Why would I scent you all the time if I didn’t want you?”

Oscar wants to bring up the nose thing, how he just thought that’s how Lando kept himself comfortable. Want to bring up how Lando never said anything. But it’s details, really. Details that don’t really matter, not when Lando is standing in front of him, saying he’s in love with Oscar.

So instead, he grabs the front of Lando’s hoodie, pulls him close, presses their lips together in a searing kiss. Lando yelps, but then melts into it immediately, making a happy little purring noise in the back of his throat.

(Later, with his arms wrapped around Lando’s naked, sleeping form, Oscar presses his nose into the place where Lando’s neck meets his shoulder. He smells like LandoOscarLandoOscar, and it’s the most beautiful thing Oscar’s ever smelled. He’s falls asleep only seconds later.)

[bleedingcoffee42]

WIP game!!! Your fic Life makes me absolutely feral so obvs "Life - Ch 7"

I am working on this, I promise. I have to finish that soulmate fic first. I have a ton written but I have to go back and reread the entire thing to see what breadcrumbs or landmines I left for myself because I just make it up as I go and make it future!me's problem. Plus I got sucked into research about the Nixon plant getting blown up and might want to use Stan's car accident. Anyhow, snippets out of context under the cut because this is all about indulging bitchy housewife Ron.

“I put photos up on the situation board you need to look at.”  Dick said and Nix threw up his hands in the most New Jersey expression he had yet to see from him.  “Didn’t say where I got them.” “Yeah, hard to figure that out.” Ron mumbled and pointed at Nix. “You’re staying here. You’re not going back to that house alone.” “Yes, sir.” Nix said and hummed. “Cock and wine night,  here I come.” “What are they looking for?”  Dick asked to nobody in particular.   It wasn’t the blackmail material, anyone who knew about them wouldn't care they had classified docs floating around. He then looked at Nix.  “They were looking for you.  You’re the most valuable thing in that house.” “Damn, Dick. You guys are one hell of a team.  One second he’s telling me I’m moving in and next you’re telling me I’m a treasure.” “I think we’re looking at this all wrong.” Dick shook his head.    “Boo.”  Nix frowned.   “You’re a treasure, Nix.”  Dick said and then leaned on the kitchen counter.  “I think someone’s trying to take you.” “Take me, Dick.”  “As in kidnapping.” Dick clarified only to have Nix redirect his grin to Ron. “Take me, Ron.”  “Nix.” Dick chided.

And later that morning....

“I need to borrow your truck.”  Ron said as he entered the room.  Dick was getting ready to leave for work and Nix was ogling him putting on his holster.  He wondered at this point if Nix was ever going to go back to his own damned house. “I need it to go to work.”  Dick said and shrugged his shoulders as he got the leather harness to sit right before putting on his jacket.  Then he waved at Nix who still had his own gun, jacket, keys, phone and wallet piled on the counter.   “For us to go to work.” “I’ll drive you.”  Ron said.    “In my single cab pickup with manual transmission?”  Dick asked.   Ron rolled his eyes, and turned to Nix.  “You ride in the middle, unless you have a problem with spreading your legs for a shifter?” “Not. At. All.” Nix hummed. “Great. I’ll drive.”  Ron grabbed the keys off the counter and the remains of his coffee from this morning. “It’s my truck.”  Dick repeated. “And I would like to actually get something done today before I have to pick you two up from work this evening. Like cook complicated dinner your Mom wants me to made in order to seduce you.”  Ron said, not looking for an argument.  Especially since Dick drove like a tourist. “Cock and Wine night.”   Nix reminded Dick. “But…” Dick protested before Ron snapped at him. “You want to shift gears into his crotch right before you go to work on day three, after he already tried to kiss you yesterday?  Going to beat it off in the locker room before your shift starts? Or just jerk each other off in the truck to save time?” Ron asked, bitchier than needed but, by GOD, someone had to smack some sense into him. Things he never thought he would have to do for one Richard D. Winters. “I do believe that is inevitable.”  Nix said.  “So, why don’t you have a car?” Ron huffed. He wanted to bark 'Just get in the damned car' but these two just had to keep asking questions. “I just haven’t decided what I want yet.  Been gone 10 years and have driven army vehicles, not sure what is out there I want.  Other than an antique Mercedes I can’t afford anymore because of our property taxes. Which is fine.  They aren’t as bullet proof as they advertise.  Any other questions?”

[youllneverknow28]

stars

ricky Bowen x black!reader

not proof read 😭

After opening night me Gina, EJ, Ashlyn kourtney Carlos, and seb all met up at the local pizza shop still in my clothes I tried my very best not to spill tomato sauce on the white dress. I had seen eyes on me, but not just anyone’s eyes. Ricky Bowen‘s eyes I had had a thing for Ricky since third grade, but I shut those feelings away after he started dating nini and honestly I had kind of felt like an outcast. Gina was with EJ gadget was with Ashlyn Jet was with kourtney. And me and Ricky were the only ones single. my hair was braided curls at the end in the white dress that fitted me oh so perfectly. Every time I laughed, smiled, giggled, or even side eyed I could feel Ricky Bowen’s eyes on me. What the fuck I thought after the show at camp shallow lake I was sure him and Gina would hit it off, but EJ swindled his way back to Gina and now they’re living happily ever after. I wasn’t jealous. Why would I be jealous it’s not like the boy. I’ve had a crush on since third grade just kept getting bitches prettier than me but I’m not nini and they’re my friends now and I don’t have those hateful feelings towards them anymore I just wanna live my life and see what happens next. Go with the flow you know? And that’s what I was truly going to stick with until a walk out of the pizza shop, making my way towards my car when I heard a similar voice stop me “ Hey veah you gotta sec” turning around to see Ricky Bowen “ hey Ricky yeah what’s up” “ nothing at my dads out of town and I was just wondering if you’d like to come back for maybe movies in popcorn?” “ oh yeah, yeah shit let me him. Ask my mom she should be fine with it” I said pulling out my phone turning around and calling my mom after a five minute conversation. My mom asked to talk to Ricky which honestly kind of scary but he was a nice boy “ here my mom wants to talk to you” I said awkwardly mouthing the words. I’m sorry as I handed him the phone. “ Hi Mrs. Wallace how are you?” “ hi Ricky look I’m fine with Nevaeh staying over there, but my daughter better not come back pregnant and she sure as hell better not come back with no bruises and she better not come back with any trace of her being unsafe or hungover so basically, my question is, is my daughter gonna be safe” “she will be perfectly safe I promise” hanging up the phone he gave it back to me as we got in his car and made our way back to his house when we arrived he unlocked his door and made a little couch bed “ so what do you want to watch?” Smirking I said “ high school musical” about 30 minutes into the movie. Ricky suddenly screams “ I mean come on who does barges into song like that” giggling, I told him “ Ricky we’re literally theater kids you can’t hate on the movies that we play” “ ok but what the fuck nobody does that in the real world” “ we do that” He looks at me back at the TV and back at me again. “ we do not do that.” “ ok, Mr. Bowen whatever you say.” After the movie was done he popped in the second one. I asked him if he had any clothes, or I could borrow for the night here me a pair of his boxers and oversize T. As I made my way to the bathroom, I realized I only had my curl cream in the bag that I had brought and usually this wouldn’t be a problem, but it was the only thing I had besides the mini brush I carry all the time my hair was long, but not too long which meant It was hard to manage. I heard a knock. “ Hey, you ok in there” I heard Ricky ask opening the door curl cream all in my hand he suddenly walked in, taking some and running it into my hair “ I hope it’s ok I’m touching your hair” he says, looking at me in the mirror “ yeah it’s fine. I couldn’t do it all by myself anyway.” after he helped me with my hair we cuddled up and continued watching hsm2 and I was out of it in no time

[cr0g-0]

Borrower world building au borrower world building-

I wrote all of this on discord with the input and ideas of @wendy130 and @bio-nerds-corner

They are pretty much the reason I got this out as fast as I did-

And the word count-holy hecking heck it got very big within the span of a few days(like-three-)

So yay- i hope you all enjoy! It’s one of my more lore things and any questions with lore you can just ask me-

I encourage questions-

I will brain rot about this for ages and ages

Truth falls out and boils up till it burns

Tw: Mentions of vore(none happen), dehumanization, disturbingly cruel ideas, fear, swearing

Word count: 3844(Largest one yet I believe)

Part one of Borrowing From The Internet au

-——————

It had been just another casual stream.

Nothing bad should have happened.

Naturally things went south the moment he went onto youtube, videos about borrowers showing up.

The videos themselves didn’t seem too bad but his recommendation was filled with the videos and that was what made him worried. He hoped nobody would make any comments on it…

A donation appeared on his screen, and he tensed, his tail already anxiously curling around his leg as he read the donation. "Hey what are your opinions on borrowers? Cause like-I think they make too big of a deal of things like the 'Massive Accident' at that one restaurant..." His voice trailed off and he grit his teeth, his anxious feeling vanishing as it was replaced by raw, annoyance and anger. He took a deep breath in. 'Don't let anyone see that this stupid dono phased you-chat'll know something is fucky otherwise.' "Yeah, massive accident my ass-it was more like a genocide of entire bloodlines, families and friends-I'd really appreciate if chat didn’t bring up borrowers." Wilbur huffed, making sure to privately message a mod to ban the words and sentence 'Massive Accident' as fast as possible.

He had tough skin. He could normally handle shit like this but this time it was really getting under his skin. It was one thing if someone said it to him while he was in person but when someone in chat actively made sure to mention borrowers in the one setting, he thought he was safe from the world's mistreatment and lies about borrowers.

Wilbur was shaken back to focus from a voice call from Phil and he tried to smooth out his frazzled tail, slowly uncurling it from his leg, being as discreet as plausible in order to avoid people possibly seeing the appendage.

He clicked the answer on the call and plastered a more neutral expression, forcing a small smile.

"Hey Phil!"

"Hey Wil! How's the late night streaming?"

'Huh...was it just him or was Phil sounding a little...less cheery? It sounded forced more than anything and he would know since he was also forcing a thin layer of joy.'

He was about to continue before he felt a buzz from his phone and almost froze up.

From Dadza at 10:59

'Hey Wil you really might wanna check what's being said in your chat.'

Wilbur swallowed nervously, his tail already beginning to tightly wrap around his leg again to the point where he had to gently pry it away to make sure he didn't cut off his own circulation.

From Wilbur at 11:00

'Hey Phil, uh what are you getting at? Can you send me a few screenshots from like-a little while ago? I don't want to alert chat that anything is happening.'

He glanced up from his phone, smiling at his web camera again.

“Nothing is wrong at all chat, I'm just getting some important texts. I might have to unfortunately end the stream a little earlier than I had anticipated."

The lie came easily. He had adapted to lying to anyone and everyone he didn't talk to everyday. It was pretty easy to lie about being upset and uncomfortable at restaurants as well. The waiters and waitresses would always ask if he wanted a borrower or if he wanted an accommodating area.

They wouldn't ask in a polite way though. They sounded like it was a pain in the ass to go out of their way to ensure that a borrower, another person, was comfortable, felt safe while they went to do a basic thing. It boiled his blood and he wanted to let it boil out.

Of course, he kept his control on stream though. He didn't want to erupt while everyone was watching because naturally rumors and 'conspiracy' theories would come out and everything would surely get worse from there.

He glanced down at his phone and a shiver ran up and back down his spine at the pictures that made their way across the screen.

Nausea. That was the word he could and would use to describe how sick he felt in the current moment.

’No hate but I really don’t get why Wilbur likes borrowers.’

’Yeah I don’t either. They aren’t really even people lol’

’Just something for a person to snack on to be honest. I’ve had one. They taste pretty good-‘

Phil kept sending picture after picture with things that only further made him want to throw up everything and anything he could.

While Phil was seemingly typing and getting more he took the opportunity to message him.

From Wilbur at 11:10

’Hey Phil uh-I’ve seen enough of the screenshots. I’m gonna get off now. Could you go and make sure all these people are banned?’

He shakily breathed in and out. He mentally reminded himself that he couldn’t feel his leg and forced his tail off his leg.

“Alright chat I’m gonna head off-It’s late for me and I’m really exhausted at this point.”

Most of chat seemed to buy it but some seemed to continue spouting their horribly nauseating thoughts though he was glad to see his mods banning them immediately.

He clicked off the stream and turned his monitor off, taking a deep, stressed out breath as he curled his tail and uncurled it.

He stood up and stretched before walking towards his kitchen. He should just get some water, go to bed and relax. He needed some time to himself after tonight.

Though one thing that had made this shit night a little better was the fact that Phil had reached out. He knew that Phil was human and he hadn’t exactly told Phil his species yet but the blond had cared. He had seen Wilbur was uncomfortable and he had gone out of his way to see if he was ok.

There was a small part of Wilbur that told him, for the sake of his well-being, he shouldn’t look at Twitter.

He knew it’d be a disaster the second he turned on his phone, curling up in his bed, pulling the covers up as much as possible.

Twitter had been, oddly enough, the reasons laws had been passed that ensured borrowers weren’t just murdered so he held a small level of respect for the site…

Well he supposed he had held a level of respect for the social media giant in the beginning. The site was now more or less a place where people argued about borrowers rights and usually it was for borrowers to get less rights. It was bad enough they couldn’t vote for government positions or run in anything-no apparently to some people, borrowers should be Sold off as food and other products.

It was so bad he had once seen someone trying to ask for an exterminator to gas out their house, of which had several borrowers apparently, so they could cut the tails off and use them as makeup brushes.

Just thinking about it made him feel ill and he closed his eyes, flicking his tail close to his chest before running his hand along it, running his fingers through the fluffy fur at the tip.

He took deep, calming breaths in and out, allowing himself to focus on things that made him happy. ‘Friends…Games…Music and writing…the love and support of his friends(He longed to say families) provided him. The warmth and earnestness of their laughs…’

Once he was done with calming his nerves, his tail swung back down and light coiled around his ankle while he opened up twitter, already preparing to need another break.

He was beginning to remember why he hated Twitter, most notably, the trending page…

He was already met with the most trending in gaming and, shockingly, his name was there.

He felt that familiar anxiety begin to curl much like his tail was unknowingly doing.

He had options here. He could personally go and look at the posts there. Rip a hypothetical bandaid off…

….or he could simply ignore it, turn off his phone, possibly have another nightmare like the makeup brush incident. (He was sure he had made sure that stream was deleted right? He couldn’t remember.) Hell, he could simply let his thoughts pester him with ‘What if’s’ and endless questions till he accidentally slipped up while streaming.

It was against his better judgement he supposed. Checking Twitter had been a huge mistake in the past but third times the charm yeah?

He opened the app back up and took a deep breath before tapping the trending tab and going to his name.

He bit his lip before sucking in a deep breath as he opened it and his heart immediately sunk, a pit of dread filling his stomach. He felt like he was going to vomit or pass out and he wasn’t sure which one would be better.

His tail wrapped around his leg tighter, cutting his circulation off but he couldn’t quite tell, his mind fogging up and his breath growing shallow. He felt like he was being suffocated from within his chest.

He didn’t even notice as he began hyperventilating, frantically scrolling and clicking on any posts that had any pictures or screenshots from the stream.

His mind was only now just registering how much his body was shaking, how much his heart was racing and primes he couldn’t feel his fucking foot.

There were pictures. Seemingly innocent pictures. Most of the detailing the screenshots Phil had sent but some of them had been entirely out of left field.

Sure, they might be a joke but he was sure they weren’t jokes.

’Did anyone see a tail for a second or was it just me?’

’Oh yeah I just got a picture of it.’

’Is Wilbur a borrower lmao-?’

‘i don’t know but like-ew if he is. I’ll literally go and find a borrower right now and go squish it.’

Wilbur swiftly turned off his phone, pressing his palms to his eyes as he began to sob, frantically shaking as he tried to stop the stupid pictures and words from making there way into his head.

He grabbed at his sweater, trying to ground himself as his tail continued tightening around his already numb leg. The fog in his brain cleared a little as he took note of his numb leg and he released it, choosing to wrap his tail around a pillow instead while he sobbed.

…The day couldn’t possibly get any worse right?

Wrong as per usual. Go figures. His phone starts to vibrate and although he’d love to ignore it and call whomever or text whoever later he knows he shouldn’t.

Mostly because he’s positive it has something to do with his best pal Twitter.

With some hesitation, he sat up, taking a fee more deep breaths to ground himself in reality before beginning to rummage through his blankets.

Once he found the buzzing device a flash of relief hit him as hard as a truck. ‘Eret’. Eret was the only person that knew about his being a borrower that he trusted. Granted, Eret was just like him but still-it was nice to be able to talk to somebody about this without seeming too enthusiastic or passionate.

He clicked the answer button and brought the phone to his ear only to get a few panicked questions about if he was okay and he moved the device from his ear, setting it in speaker.

“Heeeey Eret-uh…you probably want to know about the twitter thing don’t you-“

There was no response for a moment, then another before Eret cleared their throat.

“Yes Wilbur Twitter is why I’m calling you-do not go and look at-wait how did you know this was about Twitter-?”

Another bout of awkward silence. “Wilbur are you still here?”

“…yeah I already saw Twitter Eret. I saw…I saw it.”

The silence lingered around much longer this time and both could tell the other was trying to figure out a way to comfort or reassure the other.

“I-Wilbur I’m sure they were joking around…sure I didn’t see everything cause I wanted to call you but-“

“Eret they got a picture of my tail and I don’t even know how cause I made sure my tail was always out of frame and-and-“

Wilbur was already working himself back up so he just decided to focus on the call screen and his breathing.

“Wilbur, they probably edited your tail in. I was watching the stream the entire time. And I know for a fact I never saw your ears either-“

If that was supposed to comfort him it only made it worse. He forgot to be more focused on his very obvious ears!!! He was able to hide his tail easily but his ears were close to his face which meant they were the center of focus!!

Wilbur heard Eret begin to say something else but he cut them off with a simple, ‘end call’.

Wilbur had pretty much ended up laying down in his bed, trying to mentally gather his thought and collectively calm the fuck down. Maybe Eret was right in saying that he was pretty much overreacting but that didn't matter because it was still a very real, terrifying possibility. He really wanted to limit the number of people that knew he was a borrower.

He had gotten insanely lucky with Eret who had also happened to be a borrower and who had happened to politely message him about it appearing in a video. That time, nobody had seemingly noticed it, probably focused on the game so all he had done was take down the vod and edit the YouTube video. (Eret had so kindly helped in skimming through the video to certain points, telling him exactly where his tail had appeared on screen.)

From that point forward it usually ended up being Eret who vented his frustrations about borrowers and the current conditions...and who told him to, for the love of all things, avoid Twitter.

Naturally, this only seemed to make Wilbur go onto it actively and use it.

While Eret had stopped using Twitter, they had simultaneously led Wilbur to its suffocating chokehold that would eventually lead to his first of many errors he was now coming to realize.

The next error had been allowing himself to be invited on a little thing called 'The Dream SMP.'

He hadn't had any qualms with the server at first. Hell, he had been the one to suggest and start making it a lore and roleplay-based server...

It hadn't really occurred to him that Dream would ask everyone if they wanted to add in some mods that allowed people to be shrank down. He gave his reasoning as it would make it more exciting and overall, more interesting.

An overwhelming number of people, including Eret, had said yes.

Wilbur had immediately typed a no.

Not a moment later there was a dm waiting for him.

From Dream at 12:45pm

'Why don't you want the mods? You wanna call about it because most if not everyone is alright with them.'

Dream had already started up a call and Wilbur hadn't even gotten to type a simple no and then an explanation before he was thrust into the call.

"Wilbur?"

Immediately, a jolt of anxiety and his tail snuck its way around his leg and constricted around tightly. "H-Hey Dream..."

"Would you care to tell me about you issue with the mods? Because a majority of people have no issues with the mod and I really don't want to flat out refuse adding the mod because one person is uncomfortable with it." The other spoke calmly and firmly. It was clear that he wanted an answer even from beyond the screen that lit up when he spoke.

Wilbur swallowed nervously, impulsively tugging at his hat to cover his ears even though his camera wasn't on. "They make me really uncomfortable. What with the situation about borrowers and their ri-"

"Why should the rights of borrower's concern you? They're just small, insignificant creatures that pose as humanoids."

Wilbur felt sick. Dream didn't...didn't care about borrowers. He felt his breathing begin to pick up a little and his chest felt like it was closing in around his lungs.

If he didn't care about borrowers, he didn't care about him or Eret or anyone else who was a borrower...He should have just kept his mouth shut because everything was going to shit. Primes he should have just let the mod get added and sucked it up.

“...Wilbur are you alright?"

Dream broke the silence, but he was only met with heavy, labored breathing while Wilbur pressed at his eyes, trying to take deep breaths in and out.

"Wilbur, can you breathe for me? Can you follow along with my breathing please?"

Wilbur followed along with the instructions, listening to the breathing on the other end as he sat with his legs pulled close to his chest as he watched the calming green lighting of Dreams icon every time he took a deep breath in and out.

"That's it...are you with me now Wilbur?"

There were a few beats of silence before Wilbur gathered up his thoughts, making sure it would be coherent sounding.

“Y-Yeah I'm with you now Dream..." He was met with a sigh of relief from the other end, and it almost made him smile till he reminded himself that Dream had purposefully and had outright stated how little he thought of his kind and the ghost of a smile fell.

"...Wilbur, why did you start freaking out at the mention of borrowers? I was just joking about them not being people but it's obvious that it upset you......"

A pause and then words that Wilbur had been dreading to ever hear.

"Wait. You're a borrower...aren't you?"

His mouth went dry and the call was silent. His hand hovered over the ‘leave call’ button but before he could hit it Dream spoke up.

“Wilbur, turn on your camera please. Remove your hat.”

Wilbur tried to pick out any indications of Dreams voice but he couldn’t find anything and reluctantly turned off his camera.

“Hat off Wilbur.” Dream’s voice was calm and cold.

He listened, taking off his hat and revealing his ears which appeared to droop down a little.

And before he could even realize he was spurting out random words while his tail swung around.

“D-Dream please don’t tell anyone-my life will be a hellfire and-and I’ll lose all of my friends-and Dream please don’t take my life-my everything-from me! I can’t imagine doing anything aside this for my life! It’s what keeps me sane!”

Wilbur was pleading. Begging for this one thing. For primes sake-Dream could blackmail him now! Do whatever he wished to him and his reputation!

Dream didn’t speak. He hadn’t spoken the whole time he was rambling in his wild, fearful panic.

The silence was growing uncomfortable.

There was a deep breath heard from his speaker.

And then Dream was laughing. It started out normal sounding before growing manic and cruel. The sound sent chills down his spine.

He opened his mouth to speak before Dream began to speak again. “Oh Wilbur….Wilbur…” The humans clicked his tongue.

“You really should be more careful with whom you share this information with…”

Wilbur’s blood went cold. “Wilbur you know that I now have this conversation on a video recording and several pictures of you now yes?”

He couldn’t even find words so he nodded his head, hearing Dream let out a dark chuckle.

“Good…I can already guess you know that I’ll be using these pictures and videos when I deem I must?”

Wilbur tearfully nodded, choking back a building sob.

“Good. You’re good with the mod then right? And you’ll utilize it right?”

He nodded before he heard Dream again.

“No, I want you to verbally tell me.”

He shakily breathed in and out, clenching his hands into fists. “Yes I will use the mod and I’m good with it-“ He snapped.

“Watch your tone Borrower. Remember who has more power out of the two of us.” Dream spat.

That made Wilbur pissed more than frightened and it sent him over the edge.

“Uh you certainly don’t possess a lot of power in this case. You’re pathetic enough to blackmail me like a spineless welp. I have half the mind to report you to Ph-“

“Ah yes-go crawling back your owner borrower. Go whine to him about what the ‘Horrible’ human threatened.”

“Don’t make me laugh. Do you really think Phil would care? He’s just like me.”

“O-Of course Phil’d care! He cares about everyone and everything!” Wilbur shouted, glaring at the screen to mask his horrible thoughts that lingered too long.

Phil was a good person. He was kind and he made sure the people he cared about were ok! It wouldn’t matter to him surely if Wilbur was a borrower right?

“Oh come now Wilbur….he’s a human…you know all the things a human could do to you right?”

Wilbur went to argue when Dream decided to continue his spiel.

“As a matter of fact Wilbur-most of the humans wouldn’t lift a finger if I were to grab you and try anything. They’d just let me do what I would like.”

“I’m dying to know if anyone wants to eat you. Oh how cruel and funny it would be if Tommy did the deed.”

Wilbur appeared to lose all confidence in his prior statements at the last sentence.

Tommy also happened to be human. Most if not all his…his ‘friends’ were humans actually…

Which meant Dream was probably right. No human would ever care…

Wilbur quickly turned off his monitor, not wanting to hear anymore of Dream's words.

There was a moment of quiet save for his shallow breathing and pounding heart.

The situation finally hit him full force and he gasped, grabbing at his tail and wringing it in his hands as he swiftly stood up.

Dream was going to blackmail him. He already was blackmailing him. The human he had wanted to tell was Phil but after the talk with Dream his brain couldn’t help but think that Phil would do the same as Dream. It was probably better it had been him.

If it had been Phil he knew he wouldn’t be able to fully recover. If anything he would probably…

Holy primes Phil would have probably tried to find where he lived or-or he’d find a way to take Wilbur and then who knew what he’d do-

He was lucky Dream had found out. (The other half of him said he wasn’t lucky. It told him that if Phil had found out he would be nothing but kind.)

He forced the other thoughts away. He was certain, as much as it sucked, Dream was right.

No human would care about him. No one would look out for him. He would get hurt if he trusted any human.

No matter who they pretended to be.

[luxwritesfanfic]

Don’t Take The Money

Poor reader thought it would end up being a normal Sunday but that must’ve been the mix of bleach and Pinesol fumes getting to their head. Or, the one where reader finds out they have more in common with the other woman in Sherlock’s life than they thought and Sherlock has an aneurysm at the revelation. Thanks for reading!

Sherlock Holmes/Reader

You were just waking up when Sherlock was moving around the bedroom trying to pack his overnight bag. You groaned at the noise of drawers being opened and hangers jostled and rolled over onto your stomach, propping yourself up on your elbows. “Sherlock? You’re leaving?”

He stopped in his tracks back towards the closet and moved to sit on the edge of the bed next to you. He looked down at you with fondness that so many people thought he was incapable of feeling and as always, it made your heart swell. Brushing a lock of hair behind your ear, you relished in his undivided attention.

“A case was brought to my attention. I won’t be gone for long, it’s a few towns over.” He insists, trying to ease your worries before they arise.

Although you’d miss him, it never did anyone any good when Sherlock was bored. He needed something to keep him occupied and you needed time to clean up the drywall shrapnel that constantly covered the couch due to the boredness. It would give you the opportunity to deep clean the flat and the idea wasn’t so bad.

“Is John going too?” Sherlock nodded. You don’t know why you asked, they always worked together.

You turned your head to kiss his palm and sat up to get out of bed. “Okay. I’ll make you breakfast before you guys leave. Nobody likes train food anyway.”

Sherlock moved to help you stand, one of the smiles he reserved just for you gracing his lips. “You take excellent care of me. But you should know, you don’t have to be useful for this to mean something to me.”

He caught you off guard, but he usually did when he read you like a book. Your whole life you’d made yourself useful and you weren’t sure if people liked you for you or for the fact that there’s nothing you wouldn’t do for them. You would do anything and everything for Sherlock and it didn’t have anything to do with being useful, honestly. You loved him dearly and you couldn’t imagine treating him like you felt anything less than that. You couldn’t help but kiss him.

“Omelettes or pancakes?”

—

Your shirt was soaked from washing the dishes and you smelled like a mixture of bleach and formaldehyde from scrubbing the fridge clean and removing the severed head that took up the space where your coffee creamer should be. You had done more loads of laundry than you could count, bleached the bloodstained tub from Sherlock’s latest pig quest, the entire flat smelled like Bahama breeze and you couldn’t be more content. The boys weren’t due back for a day or two so you figured you’d spend some time with Mrs. Hudson when you were done and see if you could meet up with Bucky and Greg for lunch. When you passed the kitchen on your way to your bedroom to change, you decided that this may be the only chance you ever get to clear off the dining room table. Sherlock’s science equipment had overrun it and you figured it wouldn’t hurt if you straightened it up just a bit.

You were in the midst of cleaning out Sherlock’s beakers when you heard the knock on the door. Figuring that John would have posted on his blog that they weren’t currently taking clients because they were on a case, you expected to see Mrs. Hudson and the mop she was letting you borrow. You cracked the door just enough to see who was on the other side and was surprised to see an older woman holding a plate of baked goods who wasn’t Mrs. Hudson.

“Hi... how can I help you?”

The woman in question’s eyes lit up at the sight of you and you weren’t sure why. She smiled and gestured to the platter in her hands. “Is Sherlock Holmes here?”

She must be a client, you thought. Shaking your head, you responded, “No, sorry! The boys off on a case. I’m a friend of theirs. Is there something I can help you with?”

She was looking past you into the flat and you weren’t sure what she was looking for. “Do you mind if I come in? I could really use a cup of tea. And I wanted to drop these cookies I made for Sherlock off.”

You looked at what she was holding and decided it wouldn’t really hurt to let her in, and the cookies looked amazing. Sherlock must have helped her in some way.

“Sure, come on in. Sorry about my clothes... I’ve been doing some spring cleaning.” You stepped aside and let her in. “So, are you a client of his?”

She went to place the platter on the table and you were excited that it was already worth cleaning off the table. “Not quite. I’ve known him his whole life and have loved him even longer.” She turned and smiled at you, seeing through you in a way that seemed eerily close to Sherlock.

You hummed, taking in her answer. Sherlock didn’t talk much about his friends, so you weren’t surprised that you never heard of her.

“Just a minute, I’m gonna change.”

You excused yourself to the bedroom where your phone was charging on the bed. After sending Sherlock a quick text that someone who wasn’t a client was here for him, you dug around in the closet for something clean and more appropriate.

The lady didn’t really seem like a threat and you were sure if it came down to it, you’d be able to protect yourself. You could chuck the skull on the mantle if need be, it was a hard hitter.

When you returned, she was wandering around the flat and looking at all of the pictures of you, Sherlock, and John that you’d recently framed and put out.

“You and Sherlock, you’re close, yes? Tell me about him. It’s been so long.” She was holding a picture that you took of you two in the back of a taxi. Sherlock was on his phone but you thought his hair looked extra good and the golden hour light made him look like an angel so you had to take the picture.

“Yeah, I mean. He’s a seriously great person. A brilliant detective, he’s so smart. He helps all these people for free, and he never complains if they don’t offer him anything. He hates when I tell him he’s a godsend but who else would do that? Um... he’s really funny, probably one of the funniest people I know. You just have to keep up with his humor. It can be kind of dry, but it’s there. He’s one of the most loyal people there is and he’d do anything for the people he cares about.”

It was so easy for you to speak so highly of him. It was like second nature.

“He can be stubborn sometimes, and he can be a little more blunt than he needs to be but... he’s amazing. There’s no other way to explain him, really. He’s got a light that comes from him that rivals the sun and I don’t think it could ever be dimmed.”

She turned back to you and slowly broke out into one of the biggest grins you’d ever seen someone wear. “You really love my son.”

“Your son?” You blinked, unsure of what was going on. You really started to look at the woman in front of you and you realized Sherlock had her eyes. A complete copy and paste. “Oh my God, you’re Sherlock’s mom. I never even introduced myself. I’m Y/N, a friend of-”

“You’re not his friend, dear, and I’m not blind. Old age takes a lot from you, but I could never miss the way my son shines. And you... you see it too.” She walked up to you, still holding the picture frame in her hands. “You love my son in a way that no one else has. Let me tell you all about him.”

—

You couldn’t stop laughing.

Sherlock’s mom had brought over tons of scrapbooks and old pictures that she had acquired over the years, and you had a feeling she knew you were here alone before she even knocked on the door. Mycroft, probably. You spent the whole day getting to know each other and taking a stroll down memory lane with her telling you all about Sherlock as a kid and how it was growing up with two geniuses as sons. She even gave you a copy of one of Sherlock’s high school pictures that you were going to cherish forever. She seemed so happy to have someone to talk to and assured you that spending time with you was the closest she had felt to Sherlock in a long time.

You insisted that she stay and let you make dinner, but she was as equally stubborn as Sherlock and ordered you takeaway as her treat. You tried to argue but she was having none of it. “My God, you scrubbed this whole flat clean. I’m not going to let you dirty your dishes. How does Chinese sound?”

—

Sherlock barreled up the steps with all the force he could muster in his legs and rushed in to see you, perfectly fine and all in one piece, having dinner with his mother.

“Sherlock!” You both exclaimed, his mother full of excitement and you full of worry.

“What’s wrong?” You ask, standing up from your end of the couch. “I thought you were on a case? Is everything okay?”

“I’ve been texting and calling you all day! You’re that daft that you couldn’t text back once all this time?” He’s still out of breath and he can feel his heartbeat in his ears. His tone is exasperated and you could hear the mix of anxiety and relief in his voice as he’d yet to acknowledge his mother. She seemed perfectly content to sit back and watch the situation unfold, amusement at her son’s unusual outburst gracing her features.

“My phone was dead! And then I put it on the charger and I forgot about it once your mom came, by the way!” You went to the bedroom and retrieved your phone to find a dozen missed texts and calls.

Probably just a client. SH

11:07 AM

Are you sure it’s not a client? SH

11:43 AM

Are they still there? SH

1:00 PM

Missed Call

1:17 PM

Missed Call

2:03 PM

Call me back. SH

3:26 PM

Y/N, I’m on a case. Call me back. SH

3:44 PM

Missed Call

4:13 PM

Is everything alright? SH

4:52 PM

Missed Call

5:08 PM

Missed Call

5:10 PM

Missed Call

5:12 PM

I’m boarding the train now and I’ll be there soon. Don’t worry. SH

5:21 PM

Sherlock followed after you, still without ever acknowledging his mother, and shut the door after himself. With his palms braced against the wooden door, he tried to ease the tension out of his bones through a deep breath as he watched you check your phone. He wasn’t worried about the case at all. It was mostly solved and what little was left John could do with ease. He felt the weight of the missed calls in his stomach like lead and the three hour train ride that he couldn’t curse to defy time any quicker. He had plenty of enemies and you had virtually none, so there would be no reason to think you’d hesitate to assist anyone who came to his door, especially if it was in the name of helping him. He thought he’d walk into a crime scene and he couldn’t shake those images out of his head.

You got up from the bed and walked over to him, reaching to wrap one arm around his neck and to take his hand in yours in the other. You pressed a kiss to his jaw, and then to his chin, over his eyelids, his nose, and then lastly you met his lips, murmuring “I’m sorry” in between every kiss. He didn’t usually voice it, but you had known him long enough to know when he was upset. He relaxed into your touch as he always did and you pulled away from him long enough to pull on the ends of his scarf. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. Let me help. We got takeaway for your mom and I but we can share mine. I got what you like anyway.”

He let you pull his scarf and jacket off and you were delighted to see he wasn’t really mad with you. You hang his jacket on the closet door and by the time you turn back to face him, he’s already making his way back out to the living room. Following after him, you see his mother gesturing him to come over.

“What are you doing here? I thought I told Mycroft to tell you I was away on business.” He was messing with the cuffs on his sleeves but his question was directed at his mother with unmistakable intent. She tsked at him, and you began to see even more similarities in their mannerisms.

“That’s no way to talk to your mother, William. I was spending some time with your darling partner here and I don’t even get a kiss or a hug?” She began gathering her belongings and threw her purse over her shoulder. You weren’t happy to see her go.

You did peak up at the name. “William? Your name is William?”

Sherlock groaned, ignoring you completely. You swore you could see a blush dusting his cheeks. In no time he was at the door, holding it open for his mother. “It’s getting rather late, don’t you agree? Father must be wondering where you are. Be sure to pay Mycroft a visit the next time you’re in town. I assure you, he always has time for family.”

She turned to you and blew you a kiss. “I had a great time with you today, I hope you’ll manage to bring Sherlock home more.”

Walking over to Sherlock, she paused to kiss his cheek and whisper in his ear, “I know you know what you could lose here. So be sure you don’t, Sherlock.”

Before she totally stepped out of the flat, she turned around one last time. “Promise me you’ll come home soon. Your father and I miss you dearly.”

“I heard you the first ten times. Goodnight and safe travels, mother.” Sherlock shut the door before his mother could get another word and your shoulders slumped.

“Hey, that was your mom! She’s really nice. We had a good day.” You started to clean up the coffee table and take the dishes into the kitchen. You couldn’t understand Sherlock’s relationship with his family but you were sure there was a lot of things you didn’t know. Still, it was nice to have a chance to bond with your (maybe one day) future family. It was then that you realized that Sherlock never said anything when his mother mentioned you being his partner. You two never really officially defined what you were, so to see him not object to an actual title made you feel all warm inside.

“No, you had a good day. I was trying to work a case and clear a man’s name while trying to figure out if I’d come home to you kidnapped or dead.” Sherlock rolled his eyes, watching you from the doorway. You looked back at him as you dropped the dishes into the sink and let out a sigh. You hated the fact that you let him down.

“I have to go back tomorrow to tie some loose ends with John. If you come with me, I have a feeling I’ll get over it a lot quicker.” His voice was quiet but full of mirth. He won’t hold this over your head, and you both know this, but if it makes him feel better you’ll follow him. You’d follow him to the ends of the Earth and off the edge if he lead you.

Sherlock pushed himself off of the doorway and walked towards the bedroom, unbuttoning his shirt as he went.

“So, you’re staying home tonight?” You swung around the  kitchen doorway and called out to the hall. You hadn’t even thought about Sherlock having to go back, and you couldn’t help but be excited that he would be there for you to fall asleep next to tonight. 

“You didn’t expect me to make the trip back at this hour, did you? Besides, I sleep better with you and it’s obvious that I don’t focus well if you’re not around, Which is why I need you to come with me tomorrow. It seems you owe me, anyway.” Sherlock takes a step back so you can see him in the bedroom doorway, and you can feel your heart in your throat.

He’s so beautiful, you think, all alabaster skin and lean muscle. He’s pulling a t-shirt over his head and you wonder if you could manifest a photographic memory long enough to commit him to memory. Of course he notices you staring, and you almost want to mention all the times you catch him staring at you but he changes the subject and opens the blankets for you and you shut up and follow him. You follow him and you love him and you wake up in the morning at the crack of dawn to run downstairs and order coffee from the shop next door before your train leaves, being sure to get them to write “William” on the cup. Sherlock doesn’t find this funny at all, but he still lets you fall asleep on his arm on the train ride there and doesn’t complain when his arm falls asleep right along with you.

He thinks that if this is the life his mother wished for him as a child, that would be one thing he could take off of his list of things she eventually needs to answer for. Because mothers know best, and when it came to you, she could have never been more right.

[mysterytickingnoise]

Someday

Pairing: Merlin x Reader

Genre: Bittersweet Angst

Word Count: 2,058

Summary: After getting caught and accused of doing witchcraft, and failing to prove your innocence to Uther, you have to take desperate measures to flea the kingdom. Unfortunately your escape plan works a little too well, and without your knowledge the people close to you end up mourning you.

Request from @joyismycenter : "If you’re asking, I’d love some bbc Merlin x reader where he though the reader was dead but she/they turn out not to be. Love me that happy angst"

Authors Note: Thank you so much for sending in the first request for this blog! Fair warning I'm doing all my writing on my phone at the moment and I couldn't really get the ending to flow how I wanted it to so it's not perfect, but I really hope everyone likes it!

[Image Description: A gif of Merlin (from the BBC Show Merlin played by Colin Morgan) looking over his shoulder. End description]

It was such a silly mistake.

You trusted someone too soon, tried to help them.

Next thing you knew you were being accused of witchcraft. It was true but considering your accuser had no real evidence you thought perhaps you could argue your way out of it. You called them crazy, demanded proof, spouted off any alternative explanation for what had happened to no avail. Uther didn't give a damn about proof, the moment the word magic was held against you it was up to you to prove you hadn't used it.

Even if you hadn't, how do you prove a thing like that?

Pleading your case was useless, and the one person who could help you had left with Arthur and the knights before any of this had begun. Even if they somehow showed up before the execution, you wouldn't want Merlin's help.

He couldn't be caught helping you, not with his destiny. You weren't worth the risk, though he certainly would've argued otherwise if he'd had the chance.

No, you only had one choice left in your small cell. You would have to find an opportunity to use something that you saved for a situation such as this. When an old friend came to visit, to say goodbye, that was your opportunity.

You asked them to come back with the blue vial tucked in the back of your armoire. "It's a poison," You had told them. "I don't want to give Uther the satisfaction."

Tearfully, they obliged. In the middle of the night you chugged it down, and not one hour later your 'body' was wrapped in a sheet and wheeled out of the dungeons 'To be buried in the morning.' But the enchantment on the potion wore off before then, and you woke up alone and free.

You crept out of Camelot at the break of dawn with nothing but the clothes on your back, making it to the treeline before your will broke down and you turned back to look at the old castle peeking out over the tall walls.

Your home was behind those walls, your friends lived there, and the man you had surely fallen for. Tears stung your eyes as you thought about him, the fact you never got to say goodbye, how long it would be until you would see him again.

You could risk waiting for him to return, but if someone outside of Arthur's party were to catch you...you would be forced to do something you'd regret. You'd have to cross the line of no return and goodbye at that point would surely be permanent.

'Someday,' You thought, 'Until then, he'll understand, he might even come find me.'

Little did you know the guard who discovered the empty cloth had no intention of telling the king that the body of a prisoner had gone missing on his watch. No, he had a family to tend to, he wasn't losing his position because of some witch. It didn't even cross his mind that you might not be dead.

There was an empty grave in the pauper's field the next morning, and any questions on your whereabouts were contained in the mind of one underpaid guardsman for two years.

Meanwhile, Merlin had been devastated when he heard the news, even confused. Gaius told him the whole story, what he knew of it anyway, but he could never wrap his mind around it. It didn't make sense. He had spoken to you only a few days before, you smiled and hugged him and told him to come home safe. And just like that you were gone? The irrational fear of someone you tried to help, and the blind tyranny of Uther, that's all it took and now nobody would ever see that smile again. No, it didn't make any sense at all.

He eventually did what he had to do, put on a brave face and got back to work. And yes, a while after that night things got somewhat close to normal again. But there were always moments where he'd think to himself that he'd have to tell you about his day or a joke he heard, and then he'd remember. In other moments, he'd see Uther laughing at dinner or be forced to hear one of his speeches and his jaw would clench just a little tighter than it had before. And when he found himself awake in the middle of the night, when the world was dead silent and the only light in his room came from the moon, it was because he had found himself caught up in the memories you had together.

You had those nights too.

You had been dead on your feet by the time you stumbled into the small, reclusive village you'd learn to call your home. You'd been told that nobody really ever passed through on purpose, and they liked it that way. You told them that you could use a life like that, and then asked if they had need a physician. They did.

Sure, a reclusive person probably would've loved the little life you built for yourself. You had a small but cozy spot to live on the edge of the village, not long after you showed up you began to tend to minor wounds and ailments, making a few friends along the way. Occasionally two farmers would ride into the city to barter off crops for supplies and other things, eventually they began to bring you back a book or a small trinket each time to thank you for your work. It was nice.

But still loneliness tugged at your heart, more than you imagined it would when you took that last look at your home. On the most random days, doing the most random things, you'd find yourself thinking about everyone again and crying for up to an hour before you could pull yourself together again. Those moments became more rare over time, but they never hurt any less. You were never quite back to normal.

Finally, you were wrapping a farmers broken finger, speaking about the state of the kingdom and how you were surprised Uther had felt the need to improve anything it all, when you heard the news.

"Oh, no. The king died months ago, Arthur's in charge now."

You knew you must've gone pale, as the next thing the man said to you was a question of your health. You were quick to respond with a growing smile, "Why didn't you say something earlier?"

He shrugged at you, "I'm not all that concerned with politics. These men, they're all the same to us out here, you know?"

But you knew the difference.

Your life depended on it.

You finished his treatment and sent him away without much else to say on the matter. You had to pack, after all. Later on that day you pleaded with a neighbor to let you borrow her horse, and your friends gathered around as they overheard you say you needed to go to the capitol. You honestly felt a bit bad leaving in such a rush, but after you relayed a safe version of your story, why you came here and why you had to leave, they all seemed to understand.

With many promises from you that they could send for you if they ever needed to, and many words of encouragement from them, you took off. Even when you stopped in the night to allow the horse some rest, you never got any yourself, too excited and nervous and overwhelmed all at once. You spent hours contemplating what to say to everyone, but nothing seemed right.

Another days journey, and you were home.

The response you got to your return wasn't what you expected. Your first stop was to check on the friend who got the potion to you in the first place, and strangely they let out a short shriek before slamming the door in your face. You knocked again, speaking through the door. "It's me...I'm back?"

"Go away!"

You furrowed your brow at them, hurt and confused. But ultimately you walked away, thinking a reaction like that might be deserved considering what you must've put them through that night. As you continued down the street there were a few people who recognized you and proceeded to clear out of your way with gasps and whispers, pulling along anyone they were walking with.

Last time you were here you had been accused of witchcraft, and two decades of fear don't just disappear with a new king, so you simply accepted that as the reasoning and started to make your way up through the lower towns.

On the other end of the city, Merlin had just reached the end of an extremely long day. It had dragged on so long that it felt as though the walk from the armoury to his room took another hour. He didn't even bother to get something to eat, he just wanted to sleep. So naturally when he had just layed down in bed when someone decided to knock on the front door, he didn't know any better than to be annoyed.

At first he thought Gaius would take care of it, then he remembered that he wasn't home.

Maybe they'll just go away.

Whoever it was knocked again and he pulled the pillow over his head.

Please go away.

The front door creaked open and he heard a familiar voice call out. "Hello...Gaius? Merlin?"

He sat up, a heavy feeling settling into his gut as he realized where he had heard that voice before.

But...it couldn't be. Could it?

He shook his head, leaving his bedroom to shoo out the person who couldn't have been you.

But there you were, flipping through an old book that had been sitting on the table since the day before. When you noticed he was standing there you looked up with a sad smile, saying the only thing that you could think of; "Hi..."

"Hi?"

"I uh- I know it's been a long time," You started, crossing your arms over your chest in an awkward stance. "I wish I didn't have to leave like I did but..."

"Leave??" He repeated what you said once more. Finally you registered how strangely he was looking at you, not angry or upset but bewildered, and maybe even scared. What he said next confused you even more. "How are you alive?"

"I thought you might've had more faith in me than that." You joked, but he wasn't amused. "Am I missing something?"

He was hesitant to approach you, unsure of how he was supposed to say it but he tried. "They told me you were gone, that you'd poisoned yourself. I mean...Gaius saw you."

"It was meant to look like that, but it was a trick." You said. "I left when I awoke, they didn't tell people I escaped?"

He shook his head no, tears starting to stream down his face. "...I can't believe this."

As the reality of the situation hit you, you couldn't help but cry as well. All you were guilty about, what you thought you put your loved ones through, it had actually been so much worse. "I am so sorry, if I had any idea I would've- well I don't know what I would've done. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'm just, I'm so happy that you're here, and you're okay." Striding over with a grin, he pulled you into his arms. "I've missed you."

"And I, you. More than I could ever put into words." With a laugh you continued. "Things got so boring without you."

"I'm sure they did, you won't believe some of things I have to tell you."

And that was all it took, you both sat down at a table as you filled each other in on everything that had happened in the last two years. It took hours, there were multiple times you had to stop and collect yourselves as certain stories had you laughing until your stomachs ached. Gaius came home and after another tearful welcome back he made you all something to eat and had plenty of his own twists on things that had happened.

As if no time had passed at all, the world felt normal again. You were back where you belonged.

You were home.

[muichiroslover]

Disclaimer!!

This fic includes a Manga spoiler

From the manga “Tokyo Revengers” if

You aren’t that caught up and don’t

know the events then you’ve been warned!!!

Also this fic doesn’t follow the exact

timeline of Tokyo revengers!

Without further ado then

[spoilers from the Valhalla arc]

G/n= gang name

(Also yes i lazily borrowed characters from Genshin💀) + trust me to the end guys😭

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

The wind blew and your hands shook as you looked down at your boyfriends cold turning body, it felt like the world around you was spinning, your ears were ringing and your hands stained in the god awful red color of blood

“Kei, Kei please- please you-you have to get up, come on come on baby” you said in a shaky tone as your boyfriends head laid in your lap, his eyes barely lidded open, it was a cold day

He reached his hand up to you, it landed on your cheek as you put your hand over it in a desperate try to keep him here with you

Tears cascaded down your cheeks as your mouth clenched in anger sadness and grief

“I’m sorry...I thought I could do it..” he said hoarsely and you shush him telling him to save his energy until the ambulance could make it

He laughed, his laughter turning into a fit of coughs as blood shot out his mouth

“I’m not making it out babe..” he says and you shake your head “shut up Keisuke you always say the worse things at the wrong time” you cry as you hold onto the cold hand on your cheek

He smiled up at you, fangs showing and all as his eyes began to go dull

“I love you” he says and your eyes widen noticing how his hold on you started getting limp

“Kei! Kei I love you so much! I love you too so-so please d-dont do this” you pleaded and he slowly closed his eyes as he muttered one last thing to you

Your eyes widen as his hand goes limp on your cheek and his eyes fully close, he laid peacefully on your lap as the world fell silent

You didn’t get to grieve long as your vice captain ran up to you, pulling you

“Come on y/n! The cops are coming quickly we have to go!” He shouted, you seemed lost as he dragged you away from your beloved, Kazutora taking your place as he looked at you apologetically

“Come on boss!” Kazuha groaned as you weren’t exactly cooperating, tears streamed down your face as you turned around as you and Kazuha bolted to your motorcycles

You got on quickly as you started your engine, your team following quickly, you took once last glance at Baji and Kazutora as you gritted your teeth and drove off as the sounds of sirens approached

As you drove your head felt as if it was spinning and as if the sky itself was about to collapse on top of you, and you couldn’t stop it

Your mind just kept thinking of him

Baji Keisuke

Your beloved since childhood, no matter how much it hurts he’s gone now, he won’t ever sneak through your window at 3am to sleep

He won’t ever come over when his moms not home so you can cook for him

He won’t ever come over again to tell you about another stray cat he saved

It will never happen again

And that’s painful

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been about 6 days since the bloody Halloween incident, your members could see the way you would seem lost or empty during meetings

The way your eyes would loose focus then tune back in at the last minute

They felt helpless as their leader seemed to fall apart in front of them

You sighed as a knock came at your door, you got up from the couch of your house and opened the door to see your first division captain

“Xiao, whats the problem?” You ask as you invite him in

“Someone wants to meet with us, he originally got thrown out of Toman and is asking to join up with us” he says as he stands in front of your body that had just sat back down

“Alright, who is this person?” You ask

“Kisaki Tetta I believe was his name, he was accompanied by a man named Hanma as well, he was at the bloody Halloween incident as Valhalla” he explains, you stare at him

“Okay, where did he wish to meet?” You ask and he hands you a paper that had an address on it

You stare at it blankly then look up

“Who’s free?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You rode your motorcycle with a blank expression as Xiao, Kazuha, Chongyung, and Beidou rode behind you

“Y/n are you sure this is a good idea? Mikey must’ve kicked him out for a reason, shouldn’t we at least check with-“ Kazuha began as he aligned his motorcycle with yours

“Kazuha, eyes on the road” was all you said as you sped up, he sighed as he followed you without any other comments

You guys stopped in front of an abandoned warehouse as you hopped off your bike

“This isn’t sketchy at all..” Chongyung says and you sigh as you step into the warehouse, your members following close behind

As you stepped in you saw two boys standing in the center, one with glasses and one unbelievably tall with tattoos on his hands

You walked in until you stopped in front of the two boys

It stayed silent until you sighed putting your hands in your pocket

“So, you say you want to join g/n?” You ask bluntly and the tall guy laughs throwing his head back

“Straight to the point, I like her!” He says and your eyes don’t leave Kisaki’s

“Yes, I wish to make g/n stronger, with my help and the extra members I believe we can make g/n the strongest gang in Japan” he says and your dead eyes stare blankly at him before you smile

“Alright, welcome to the gang” you say

“Huh?! Y/n?!” Kazuha says grabbing your shoulder, your head falls back as you two make eye contact, the silence deadly

He lets you go as you turn your attention back to Kisaki and Hanma, both of them smiling or more like smirking

“I’m Hanma, this is Kisaki, glad to be here boss!~” Hanma says extending his hand to you, you look at his hand that had the word “Sin” on it

“Glad to have you” you say as you shake his hand

And with that the mini meeting ended and you began to head home, you parked your bike on the side of the house and opened your door, you closed it and as soon as you did someone pinned you

Your eyes met with red ones

“Kazuha” you spoke and he backed off

“Let’s have a chat” you say

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You stood in front of the entirety of your gang on the stage of your little meet up area, Kazuha sat on a crate one step below you and Kisaki and Hanma stood on the slowest part of the stage

Your members talked in whispered voices as they talked about the two boys

“Alright alright quiet down” you said after finishing a conversation with Kazuha, crossing your arms you began

“These two boys, Kisaki and Hanma are now proudly apart of g/n” you say loud and clear with no expression to your face

“What??!”

“Weren’t they there during that day??”

“Why would they join?”

“Quiet” you say and in an instant the whispers stop

“I hope you treat them with respect and how you would treat any other member, they will help g/n grow and become stronger” you say and nobody says anything

“With that, I end this meeting, thank you all” you finish as everyone begins to disband, you watch as your second division captain, Beidou signals you over

You nod at Kisaki and Hanma as you step down and jump off the stage, you follow her to a closed off area and with a second glance she looks at you like your crazy

“Y/n?? What’s all of this? We can’t trust those two, I don’t know why but I get a bad feeling please reconsider this..” she says to you and you stare at her blankly as your ears perk

You sighed

“Beidou, this was my decision alone, I didn’t get manipulated and I’m not tricking anyone, I genuinely don’t even know what to do with g/n anymore so I accepted Kisaki and his group to larger our numbers for now, please trust me and trust Kisaki”’ you say and her eyes widen as her mouth falls open

“Wha-“

“Alright I’m tired Beidou, please get home safe” you say and with that you left a bewildered Beidou alone at the wall as she watched your leaving figure

The weeks had continued as normal, you and Kisaki getting close enough to the point that you would invite him over your house

Your members had noticed your sudden closure with Kisaki and were worried that you were looking for someone to comfort yourself over a certain persons death and found the worse possible candidate to rebound to

So imagine there surprised when you announced you and Kisaki had gotten together, everyone tried to talk you out of it, everyone

“Y/n please, I know your grieving but Kisaki??” Xiao says and you sigh as you run a hand through your hair, tears brimmed your eyes

“Xiao please, for the first time since Baji’s death I feel comforted, safe, loved, please can you guys see from my point of view for one second” you say looking up at him as a tear rolled down your cheek

Xiao opened his mouth then closed it, he repeated this action once or twice before signing, with his eyebrows furrowed he looked at you

“Alright Y/n...just please don’t do anything stupid” he says and you smile at him

“Of course not Xiao, I’m not stupid” you say and he hesitatingly nods as he takes his leave from your house, you listen as the door closes and you sigh as you wipe your eye and grab your cup of coffee sipping it

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“It’s been quiet still, no gangs are trying to brawl or anything” Chongyung reports to you and you nod

“Good, then I suppose we can take a break, I heard a festival was around the corner” you say to him and he nods

“Yeah there is, are you going with Kisaki?” He asks leaning back on the chair in your house, you put your foot on the bottom of the chair as you slam it to the ground, you stare at Chongyung before smiling

“Yes I should ask him if he would like to go” you say and he looks at you before nodding agreeing with you

Chongyung was one of the few who didn’t question your relationship with Kisaki, not because he wasn’t worried but because he trusts you with every fiber of his being, you don’t do things for no reason

If this was what you wanted who was he to say otherwise?

“Then I’m gonna leave now, tell me how your date goes with Kisaki” he says as he gets up from the chair, you nod as you get up and walk him out

“Bye then” you say and he waved as he leaves, you go back in and sit down as you pick up your phone and dial a number

“Kisaki hey, can you come over?” You speak into the phone cheerfully as the boy on the other side of the phone hums and hangs up

You put the phone down as your blank stare shifts to your room, getting up you open your bedroom door, you look at the photos of you and Baji that were still hung up and the pictures of you Mikey, Baji ,Draken, Kazutora, Mitsuya and Pah chin as kids, life was so easy back then

You grab one photo of Baji smiling and smile at it, you kiss it once and then begin taking off all the pictures from your bulletin board

You open a draw and throw the pictures in and close it, you grab one picture, it’s of You Kisaki and Hanma and hang it up

You stare at it before there’s a knock on your door, without a second glance to the bulletin board you leave the room and head towards the door

You opened it and smiled at Kisaki, he looked at you as you stepped to the side to let him in, he walked in and sat down on the couch as you followed and sat next to him

“So what’s up?” He asks boredly and you beam at him

“Let’s go to the festival together” you say and he looks at you with a slight raised eyebrow

“Pleasee, it’ll be fun I promise” you say with a kind smile and tilt of your head, he sweat drops as he looks away

‘I guess I have to put up the act..’ he thinks as he looks at your gleaming eyes, awaiting his answer

He sighs

“Alright we can go..” he says and you grin at him as you grab both his hands in yours

“Thank you love! I’m so happy right now.” You say, your smile never faltering, eyes closed, grip tight around his hands

“Yeah..” he says and you let go as you turn around your smiling falling

“Oh!” You say as he turns around staring at your soft smile “what’s your favorite food? Ill make it for you” you say and he makes a face, like disgust

“Uhm, Anything is fine” he says and you nod

“The festival starts at 6 tomorrow, don’t be late! I’m serious Kisaki!!” You reprimand as you push him out your door as he groans

“Yeah yeah, 6pm got it..” he says and you smile at him as you hug him and let go before he turns and leaves and you close the door

The house falls silent as you stare blankly at the door, you turn around as you head to your room

[morkleemelon]

off the ice || chapter 2: heading in

previous || m.list || playlist || next

pairing:  college hockey player! mark x college figure skater! reader

genre: fluff, humor, sports au, college au

warnings: swearing

word count: 7k

copyright morkleemelon all rights reserved

"And we can see here in the figure that the data currently suggests-"

Your pen flies across the notebook page, desperately trying to capture everything your economics professor said in multicolor vigor. Jotting down the figure frantically, your eyes dart back and forth between the powerpoint screen and your paper, high ponytail bouncing up and down from the motion.

Being on scholarship means that you can never let your grades fall past a certain point or else they'd give the money to someone else. As harsh as it is, without the financial aid, you would not be able to continue to go to school. One of the only things that motivates you to work harder than your sleeping peers, sometimes, is the looming fear of becoming a jobless dropout, never able to achieve your dreams. 

In a lot of ways, not having money is already bad enough, but the thought of not even being able to earn it in the future is even worse.

"Does anyone know how this company should manage production costs?," your professor asks the crowd of tired students.

You immediately shoot your hand in the air. You know it. This answer was in the textbook reading last night it's-

"Yes" Your professor points behind you.

You slowly set your hand down, disappointed, turning around to see who could've raised their hand before you did.

"They should modernize their marketing efforts with more affordable tools and focus on reducing supply costs," the boy answers expertly.

That's exactly what I was going to say.

Examining his face a little more, something about him seems a little familiar, but you can't quite put your finger on it. Looking around at who he was sitting with, you begin to piece it together.

"He must be one of the Lee's if he's sitting between Ten and Jeno" you ponder to yourself, taking one final look at the boy, "is he... Haechan?". Thinking back to last spring, one of your teammates had a huge crush on the one called 'Haechan'. She always gushed about his fluffy brown hair, handsome face, and how he asked to borrow her biology notes once. You weren't exactly well versed with the university's popular people and honestly, the fact that this school has an 'F4' called "the Lees" is pretty funny to you.

This boy's hair is blonde, though, brushed down into a fringe and slightly messy from, you're assuming, taking off the hood of his sweatshirt before class. Glancing down, you take notice of the mess of white bandages wrapped around his knuckles.

Right, they just had a hockey game. He doesn't have brown hair so this must be-

"That's exactly right, Mark. Nicely done" the professor praises.

Mark. You note the name to yourself, turning back to the board as the professor continues with the lecture.

"Dude she's looking at you," Ten whisper-yells to his younger friend, nudging him sharply in the ribs.

Mark doesn't dare look down at you yet, already feeling his cheeks grow warmer with each passing second. He feels your gaze pull away from him and finally frees the breath he was previously holding captive. Shoving back at the senior boy, his gaze flutters back to you like it usually does during this class, however much to his strong denial. 

You always sit in the first row, colored pens and highlighters arranged neatly upon your favorite desk. 

Mark watches the way your hair bobs back and forth as you move your head with keen eyes. The delicate gold glint of a necklace clasp at the nape of your neck fascinates the junior boy's attention more than the mundane lecture ever could.

Spotting the slight smile on the older boy's face and the direction of his gaze, Jeno laughs quietly to himself, happy that something interesting is finally happening during the boring lesson. Leaning over behind Mark's back, he gives Ten a silent high five.

"You're a simp" Jeno whispers in Mark's ear, eager to provoke him. Mark slaps the blue-haired boy's face away.

"Fuck off," Mark whispers harshly back as Jeno and Ten laugh to themselves in the lecture hall. He habitually glances back to your focused form. And this is nothing short of how class usually goes for them: Mark fawns over you 'secretly' whilst you haven't the slightest clue. On either side, his friends tease him endlessly for it.

"Yuna and I are planning something for you guys," Ten persists.

Mark's eyebrows scrunch in confusion at the older's ominous words. The professor's voice drones on in the background as his attention shifts to Ten.

"What do you mean?"

"Don't worry about it, man". Ten smirks, smacking a firm hand on the confused boy's shoulder.

"Don't do anything weird," Mark warns, recalling the time when the senior had planned on starting a fist fight outside of your dorm building last semester in hopes to gain your attention and provide an excuse for Mark to talk to you. Although the thought was there, no it wasn't.

The hour ticks by and exhausted students groan in relief as the professor wraps up the stale lesson on fundamental economics. A mass shuffle of notebook pages flipping closed and backpacks zipping up fills the hall as students make their way out, eager to do anything but be there.

The Lee's always gather for lunch at this time at the basketball courts, attracting an impressive crowd of envious guys and adoring girls at the sidelines. Although the place is fairly beaten down and otherwise unimpressive, the Lee's choose to be there which consequently deems the courts the coolest lunch spot on campus.

Putting his things away into his trusty black Jansport bag, Mark gets ready to head down to the courts to meet up with Haechan like they always do until he feels a hand unexpectedly grip his left shoulder, stopping him in his tracks.

"Some people are gonna join us for lunch today," Ten discloses casually, keeping his gaze forward as the line of students in front of them slowly file their way out of the crowded room.

"Oh, who?" Mark questions. It's not like it's rare for other people come hang out with them, in fact, it's almost always the case. But the fact that Ten is specifically telling him beforehand feels suspicious. Another strong hand grips his other shoulder as Jeno's navy blue hair comes into view.

"Don't worry about it man. You got meal points left for this week? Lend me some," the younger boy expertly diverts.

"Yeah..."

"Let's hurry though, Haechan is probably there waiting already. I told the brat to get food for us early today". Ten ushers Mark forward and pushes his way through the herd of people.

"Aight," Mark sighs in confused defeat, picking up his pace to keep up with the senior. There's definitely something weird going on, but he doesn't have the energy to pry further. 

Then again, has he ever lived a day where his friends aren't doing some sort of weird shit?

"Thank you, professor," you smile and bow politely.

"Thank you, y/n, enjoy the rest of your day," the older man smiles back, waving you off as he packs up his lecture notes. It's small things like this that you always make sure to do to make others' lives a little better.

After all, the best thing to give-better than any monetary gift- is kindness. Right?

Your phone buzzes in the back pocket of your frayed denim shorts and you reach to check the notification.

Der sum hoez in this houz:

Yuna: guys!! Let's grab lunch somewhere new today! :DD

Hope: yassss ;););)

You: oh why? The caf has chicken nuggets today :(

This is definitely suspicious -you, Yuna, and your other friends, Lisa and Hope, always ate together at the round table in the university's better dining hall nicknamed "the caf". It's been your unbroken tradition since freshman year and the lunch lady at the caf even likes you enough to give you extra servings sometimes.

Yuna: we can still have the nuggets but Ten knows a cool place we can sit! He says he already got the food so we don't have to pay today ;)

Free food?

Your inner Mr.Krabs reveals himself as you perk immediately at the mention of her boyfriend paying for lunch. Neither guilt nor modesty had time to catch up as your thumbs rush to type a speedy reply.

You: I'm there. Where at?

Yuna: I'm coming to your classroom rn! We can walk together

Lisa: Hope and I are coming from bio :) excited

You: lol why does everyone know but me

You: is it gonna be weird with us third wheeling you yuna?

You: if y'all start kissy kissy touchy touchy I might puke just saying

Yuna: HAHAHA XD

Yuna: don't worry some of ten's friends might be there too

Oh. To be honest, you're caught off guard at your best friend's last message. Ten has been over to your shared dorm a few times and you've exchanged enough awkward greetings to call him an acquaintance at least. But generally, his friend group and yours stay separate.

Not that there is any actual beef there, but, no pun intended, nobody's tried to break the ice yet.

Closing the group chat as you reach the entrance of the economics building, you hold a hand up to block the glaring rays of summer sun from your eyes. The sudden brightness harshly contrasts the musty dark of the lecture hall, making you squint in discomfort.

"Y/n!" a familiar voice calls out. A flash of platinum blonde hair and Chanel perfume filled your senses as Yuna throws your smaller body into a crushing, sweaty hug.

"EWw!" you yelp, shoving the taller girl away from you half-playfully, catching the attention of a few concerned passer-bys.

You nod your head at them in a shy apology.

Yuna, seriously.

The guilty party laughs, the musical sound travelling through the humid air like a refreshing breeze. Your best friend sticks out her elbow for you to link your arm through.

Eyeing her with short-lived contempt, your lips break into a smile as you slip your forearm around hers, unable to be actually mad at your best friend.

"Where are we going?" you ask.

"You'll see. It's Ten's spot"

"Hi-his spot?!" You stop in your tracks, wondering why you were going to eat where Ten dealt weed.

Since when did he deal weed though?

"Not that kind of spot!," Yuna cries out, smacking a manicured hand over the top of her forehead as to not ruin her perfect foundation, "he's not like that!".

"Right good," you scoff.

The summer heat swelters as Yuna leads you down campus towards the sports center. It's early September and Seoul is notoriously hot.

Ice cream vendors with big, striped umbrellas litter the streets, calling out for business from sweaty pedestrians who crave a moment of sweet, cold relief. The sky tints a beautiful shade of blue with fluffy wisps of white clouds dotting its never-ending canvas. No matter how hot the weather is, the day is undeniably beautiful.

You don't ask Yuna more about where you're headed, accepting that your best friend likes to be spontaneous and that her boyfriend was paying for your food. This is more than enough for you to follow her down the sketchy alleyway shortcut to the basketball courts. Sometimes you wonder if you'd be really easy to kidnap...

The alley opens up to reveal a worn-out basketball court planted in the middle of a grassy area. Looking around, you noticed there are quite a few people there, most of them unfamiliar to you.

They scatter across the grass in groups, eating and chatting casually amongst their friends atop their patterned picnic blankets. You catch the gaze of a group of girls sitting at the edge of the court; they eye you up and down, taking you aback with their lack of subtlety.

Breaking the awkward eye-contact, you suddenly feel very out of place.

"Hey!" Yuna calls out, slipping her arm out of yours to wave at a group of people sitting at the other side of the court from the judgmental girls.

Her hand slips into yours, snapping you out of your uncomfortable dilemma, pulling you towards the group she waved to. A big willow tree stretches towards the sky and casts a precious spot of shade over the area. Immediately, you spot Hope and Lisa as they wave to you and you let out a breath of relief.

At least I'm not alone, maybe I won't be so awkward now.

You recognize Ten's face and you give him a smile and nod of acknowledgement. Scanning over the rest of the group carefully, you faintly recognize the other boys sitting under the tree.

The boy with the blue hair and the fitted white tee- that's Jeno.

Fluffy brown hair-definitely Haechan.

Your eyes flit to the next boy and you're taken aback when he's already staring at you. His ashy blonde fringe hair, almost grey, seems dearly familiar. His eyes widen before quickly looking away.

He's part of the Lee's... bandaged hands and that hair- that's Mark, the dude who stole your answer from earlier.

The little devil on your shoulder whispers to hold a small grudge. The little angel on the other argues that it was never your question and you shouldn't be so petty. Right, kindness is the best virtue. You will let it go.

You and Yuna reach the edge of their picnic blanket and your best friend immediately goes to sit by Ten who doesn't hesitate to pull her hips smoothly into his lap.

You look away in embarrassment. Good for her for finding love, but by golly are you painfully single.

Eyeing the space on the picnic blanket, Hope and Lisa are almost strategically sitting at the end chatting with Jeno so there is no reasonable way you could sit next to them. Setting down your bag awkwardly, you debate where you should sit, silently cursing at Hope and Lisa for not leaving a space for you. Maybe coming here was a mistake because you feel kind of left out-

"Oh, here," a small voice lets out. You look up to see Mark getting up and moving his stuff out of the way and clearing a space for you next to him.

"Ah, thank you!" You smile, kneeling down to sit in the empty space.

Thank God.

Glancing at his face, a blush even Maybelline would envy rests on his cheeks as his gaze remains glued to the food in his hands.

The first thing you notice is how handsome he is up close. You didn't get a good look at him in the lecture hall, but his face is a perfect mix of feminine and masculine beauty. His eyes are soft and round, but his jawline sharp and angled. The most chiseled cheekbones you've ever seen are handsomely defined under the mosaic of shadows and light created by the branches of the willow tree. A slight, shy smile graced his delicate, pink lips.

He's super cute. I take back everything I thought in lecture.

"Hey, welcome!," a sudden high-pitched voice rips your attention away from ogling the blonde boy. Turning your face, you see Haechan on your other side eagerly holding out a hand for you to shake. You take his hand and he shakes it vigorously, "I'm Haechan nice to meet you! What's your name?".

"I'm y/n," you reply with a smile. He's really outgoing, huh.

"Y/n what year are you?"

"Oh I'm a sophomore this year"

"Ayyy! Jeno and I are sophomores too," the friendly brunette slaps the other boy on the arm, "say hi, Jeno".

"Hey, I'm Jeno". He gives a heart-fluttering eye-smile and you could hear hushed gasps and coos ensue from the onlooking girls across the court.

"Hi, y/n," you respond shyly.

Dang, these guys are all so good-looking.

You always hear about the 'Lees' and their 'godly' visuals, but you never truly paid attention. Yet now that you're sitting with them at their cool-people-only hangout spot, you have no choice but to admit how exactly spot-on those descriptions were.

"Here, y/n" Haechan hands you a paper tray full of chicken nuggets.

"Nice! Thank you," you cheer, taking the food perhaps a little too excitedly. Working out and training nearly everyday means you're inevitably hungry most of the time. Not to mention, your stomach always rumbles at the sight of your all-time favorite food.

Digging into the free food reward, you turn back to Mark who hasn't said anything to you yet.

"What's your name?" you ask. Technically, you already know it, but you don't really know a better way to start a conversation.

Visibly surprised, Mark chokes on his chicken.

You let out a single note of laughter at his unexpected coughing before slapping a hand over your mouth to stop yourself.

"Are you okay?" you ask stupidly.

"Bruh," Haechan teases with a smirk, amused at his best friend's embarrassment.

Mark nods quickly with a hand covering his mouth as he continues coughing. Unsure of what to do, you reach over to pat him on the back firmly.

"Here, dude". Jeno tosses Mark a filled water bottle, the older boy accepting it gratefully, gulping down the water like his life depends on it (which it... actually does).

Gasping in relief as he sets the bottle down, Mark looks back at you with flushed cheeks and wet lips. You realize your hand is still on his back and you quickly snatch your hand away, suddenly flustered by the contact.

"I'm Mark," he finally answers, voice hoarse from the ordeal.

"Hi Mark, I'm y/n" you giggle.

He looks absolutely hilarious with water dribbling down his chin and cheeks as red as fire. There is something intensely endearing about him as he looks down, front teeth biting down on his bottom lip in embarrassment.

"What year are you?," you continue.

"Uh-I'm a Junior"

"Oh nice! What do you study?"

"Uh-business and sports management"

"Wow! Wait you're In Econ31 right?"

"Yeah I am," Mark smiles.

"I thought I recognized you! I'm in that class too," you exclaim. Usually, you aren't terribly sociable with people you just met, but there's something about the softness of his voice that makes him easy to talk to. That and the way he's just choked on a chicken nugget in front of you at your first meeting- you have little to nothing to lose.

"Oh yeah I-I've seen you around sometimes"

"Yeah we've seen you around sometimes," Ten calls out, a shit-eating grin plastered across his face. Yuna laughs and hits his chest in warning.

"Shut up!" Mark grabs a nugget from his tray and chucks it at the older boy. Like a slow-motion scene in a movie, Ten catches the piece of chicken between his teeth and flashes a wink back at the flustered junior.

You burst out in laughter at the interaction, slapping a hand onto your knee at the dumbfounded look on Mark's face.

Mark feels his heart clench at the sound of your bright laughter filling the air. You gasp with glee, one hand slapping your knee repeatedly and the other gripping your fork. Truth be told, he is freaking out inside. And this is not how he imagined you would meet. 

All thoughts about Ten abandoned, a wide smile spreads back onto his face as his eyes scan across your laughing form. You sport a casual outfit consisting of a grey t-shirt and denim shorts like you usually do. A simple gold chain hangs from your neck, tucked away under the collar of your shirt. Up close, Mark feels even more drawn to you than ever before.

Beautiful as ever.

"I-I can't breathe," you wheeze, "what just happened?"

"My talent," Ten states, moving his arms from around Yuna's waist to hold them up in a 'well duh' shrug.

"Nah bro, it was a good throw from me," Mark cuts in, holding up a hand to stop the gloating boy.

"Nah bro, it was a good catch from me," Ten sasses back, moving Yuna off his lap to kneel up. You meet Yuna's eyes and you both hold back laughter at the ridiculous argument.

"Nah bro" Mark moves onto his knees as well.

"Nah bro's," Haechan suddenly interjects, "It was me. I have telepathy and I moved the chicken". Haechan promptly stands up and does a body wave, posing with a finger gun pointed over the slope of his nose to his forehead.

You laugh silently between the three boys who are suddenly all standing as they argue over who was responsible for the nugget trick. You had just met these guys a few minutes ago, but you're more confused and intrigued at them than you've ever been with anyone.

Look at you go, making new friends and everything!

"Guys..." Jeno tries, but his low voice isn't nearly loud enough to be heard over the chaos.

The boys point accusing fingers at each other like in a Renaissance painting. You scooch your way over to the other girls to get out of their way, bringing your food with you.

"You're dating..." You gesture your fork at Ten who was is caught in a three-way head lock with Mark and Haechan.

"Yeah". Yuna's face remains expressionless as she nonchalantly pops another piece of chicken into her mouth. After dating Ten for almost five months now, she is well aware of what the expression 'boys will be boys' really means.

"Are they always like this?" Hope asks, bewildered. Lisa just laughs on the side, enjoying the spontaneous fight more than she should. Jeno gives up, laying down to stare at the sky and wonder why his friends are like this.

Click

Your ears perk at  strange noises coming from behind you. Turning around, you notice that several of the girls you saw earlier are now pulling large, fancy cameras out of their book bags. Baffled, you watch incredulously as they shamelessly snap photos of the tussling, oblivious boys.

"What the heck?," you gawk. You haven't been here but twenty minutes and it's already one surprise after the other.

"Tell me about it. Those weirdos are these guys' fans, the 'Lovelees' as they call themselves," Yuna explains, "You would not believe how crazy they can get. Remember when I had to put all my socials on private a few months ago? It's because they found out I was dating Ten".

"Right, I remember that" you nod your head sympathetically. Your eyes move between the unsuspecting boys and the audacious crowd of girls. Maybe you haven't known them for long, but the Lees seem like a regular group of guys. Admittedly, they are above average in the visual department (and in the strange department), but the existence of the Lovelees is really unnerving. Is it just you?

One particular girl at the forefront stares you down intently. Her hair is a mousy brown with two striking streaks of bright red down her bangs in a distasteful take on E-girl style hair. Too-light foundation is packed onto her skin and you winced internally at the severe creasing by her nose. Black eyebrows not matching her hair, her fake eyelashes bat at you threateningly.

"What's up with her?". You are genuinely confused. Why does she look like she wants to murder you?

"She's so scary," Hope's eyebrows knit in worry.

"Yeah, what's with her? She's staring at y/n," Lisa suddenly adds, attention turning to the concerning conversation.

"That's Hillary, the club president or something," Yuna confirms with a shudder, "she's super psycho about Mark. Definitely stay away from her".

"Gotcha... but why is she looking at me like that? Is it just me?"

Hillary's creepy stare never leaves your face and you feel chills run down your spine like a thousand invisible spiders. Generally speaking, you sometimes shy from even ordering food over the phone. Being under her flaming gaze makes you want to shrivel up like a raisin.

If someone could write a story about Seoul University campus life, you'd for sure be a background character. Attracting negative attention to yourself for no reason is surely a new feeling and unequivocally uncomfortable... perhaps because there is any attention on you at all?

"Well for one," Yuna smiles, poking an accusing finger into your side, "you seem to be getting along with these guys pretty well. Especially Mark". The blonde wiggles her perfectly threaded brows at you. Flustered, you shove a nugget in her mouth before she could say more.

"What are you even talking about, we literally just met". You fight to keep your voice steady and expression unaffected, but alas you can't stop the heat from spreading onto your unwilling cheeks. Admittedly, it's been a while since you've gone out with a guy. More honestly, you haven't really dated anyone since you came to campus last year. So needless to say, your single self is a little bit flustered to be thrown into the notion that you even have a chance to be with a super popular, charming guy like Mark.

You shake your head to clear the ridiculous thoughts.

Let's not err on the side of desperation today.

Peering back at the crazy fangirl who you now know as Hillary, you're relieved to find her piercing gaze has shifted from boring holes in your skull to her cell phone and she types away at lightning speed.

"I have a feeling that he likes you, y/n," Yuna presses. Hope and Lisa giggle and nod in agreement, exchanging knowing glances at each other. 

You don't have ample time to ponder more as your attention is ripped away by the fighting boys. They've shifted from the shade of the willow tree to the basketball court, disregarding all onlookers and fighting like their lives depended on it.

"Let's go. Rooftop. Right now!" Haechan screeches, taking a leap at Ten while Mark struggles to hold him back.

"Fight me here, bro," Ten taunts, "we all know I'm built different". The sass in his voice gives Haechan the strength to break away from Mark's grasp and tackle the senior boy. All eyes glue to the two boys rolling around on the hot pavement, screaming.

"Yuna, can you-" Jeno starts, eyes closed as he lay on the blanket listening to his friends beat each other up.

"Yeah," Yuna gives the tired boy an apologetic pat on the knee. "Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul".

Her boyfriend's entire body immediately freezes at the sound of his full name. Letting Haechan go from his chokehold, Ten scurries back over to his spot on the picnic blanket to kneel by an unamused Yuna like a scolded dog. "I'm sorry".

You suppress another laugh. This... this is what the cool kids are like? You were really nervous for nothing. Mark shuffles back next to you, supporting a limping Haechan who insists he's fine.

"Sorry girls. They're not... actually no, they are usually like this," Jeno apologizes, "Hope we didn't scare you away".

"No, actually. I think you guys are really... funny. It's cool how comfortable you all are". You smile at the hockey players. Weird as they may be, you don't feel uncomfortable.

"She thinks you're cool!" Haechan cries, slapping Mark on the back.

"Shut up!" Mark smacks the back of the younger's head, ready for another fight already.

"But don't you guys think it's weird we haven't met earlier? We always see the hockey team around our practices but I think this is our first time officially talking," Hope suddenly points out the elephant in the room.

"Yeah I guess that's true," Haechan ponders, "to be honest, we didn't think you guys liked us very much... or let me rephrase that- we were kinda scared to approach you".

"YOU were scared to approach US," Lisa exclaims in shock, "did you forget that you four are, like, the most popular guys on campus or what?".

The four boys look amongst each other blankly. "No, but we thought...," Haechan starts.

"... that figure skaters hated hockey players," Mark finishes. Silent glances are exchanged between all parties as this new information is revealed.

At the sheer awkwardness of the situation, you decide to interrupt the silence with light laughter. "Why would we hate you?"

"You- agh," Haechan's reasoning is cut off by a sharp jab to the ribs from Mark. No way is he going to let the blabbermouth sophomore spoil that they stalked your Facebook last year and found your post.

"I mean you all seem really cool and," Mark saves, looking at you, "I'm really glad we got to meet you today. But we were just... intimidated before".

You raise an eyebrow and your eyes meet Yuna's, Hope's, and Lisa's who shared similar expressions.

"Babe, I'm intimidating?" Yuna asks her boyfriend, peering into his eyes. Ten promptly places a hand at the back of her neck and brings her in for a deep kiss. Everyone in the group groans in disapproval and you hope the sour expression on your face isn't too obvious. Why, Ten. Why.

"Uh.. ok then," you divert, "I was never a fan of hockey itself, to be frank. The sport, not the team. And maybe I've been annoyed at you guys for hogging the ice sometimes, but I've never ever hated you! Don't worry haha".

"Bro what?!" Haechan cries, "hockey is the greatest sport of all time! It's all about strategy, speed, strength, and skills. If anything, figure skating doesn't have a point".

You gasp in full-offense. Sure, you just gave your honest opinion on their sport and it was only fair that they give theirs, but that one burns. Before you can make your counterargument, the boy next to you beats you to it.

Tapping the back of his hand to Haechan's arm, Mark's next words made your heart skip a beat: "dude, you don't know what you're talking about," he turned to look into your eyes, "it's beautiful".

Mark's eyes are a deep brown color, you notice, and they sparkle gold in the light streaming past the branches of the willow tree. Softly, they peer into yours, bringing with them a rare kindness that pinches at your chest.

"Thank you" you smile at him. Is your face always this warm?

"Okayyy," Jeno finally opts to sit up, "now that we've determined that we don't hate each other and we're all cool, are we good to be friends?". A chorus of "Heck yeah"'s and "duh"'s filled the picnic area and your heart swells with happiness. You look back at Mark and smiled again.

New friends

"You should come eat with us here more often," Mark suggests to you, warm gaze making your heart strain for the hundredth time that afternoon. What is happening? "All of you should," he corrects, looking away shyly.

"Yeah we're here everyday," Ten adds. Looking down to Yuna who had laid her head in his lap, he stroked her hair lovingly. "You should come hang out with us whenever".

"I'd like that," you grin.

"Let's make a group chat. Everyone gimme your numbers," Haechan declares.

While the brunette went around collecting numbers, you chatted with Mark, wanting to get to know him more. You quickly find that he's so very endearing, blushing and fiddling with the bandages on his fingers at your every word. His words are kind and he listens to you thoughtfully when you speak. Talking to him is so easy, surprisingly easy, and you feel the conversation unfold out effortlessly. You hardly notice as the minutes of your lunch break tick to an end.

"That's crazy! There was this one time that-" the jarring sound of your phone alarm cuts you off. Scrambling for your phone, you tap on the screen desperately to shut it off.

"Sorry guys," you apologize, "Lisa, oh my goodness, it's time for us to go to Frankie's".

Lisa checks her own watch and gasps, "Oh gosh! We gotta go guys".

"Who's Frankie?" Mark questions, eyes slightly crestfallen.

"No," you laugh while picking up your bag, "Frankie's. The diner down the street next to the lake. We work there".

Haechan, Ten, and Jeno crack up silently at their sensitive friend. 

"It was nice meeting you all!" you exclaim, "It was nice meeting you, Mark".

"Great meeting you, y/n. Hope to see you around," he waves back at you.

Bidding their goodbyes, you and Lisa make your way down the alley to her parked car.

"Y/n don't you think Mark is super into you?" Lisa says excitedly once the others are out of earshot.

"What are you saying!?" you proclaim, looking back to make sure the Lovelees aren't following you. Seeing the coast is clear, you consider your friend's accusation. So much has happened in the last 2 hours than in your year and a month at college, or your entire life honestly. 

You walked into the alley with no guy friends and are leaving with four. Is it greedy to say that Mark really does stand out to you and you might be starting to like him, or are you just like every other girl who likes him too? The last thing you want is to be like Hillary.

"He's probably just friendly to everyone," you decide.

"No way, y/n, you good in the head? This dude only looking at you the whole time," Lisa retorts.

You shake your head in denial but thinking back, it could be true.

There it is again. That nervous, light feeling in your chest.

Oh, God. What if I like him?

Mark flops down on his bed, still not down from the high that he's been on all day. No, not that kind of high. Smile plastered on his face, he runs his fingers through his freshly washed hair, recounting your conversations from earlier.

"Dude, you look so stupid," Jeno walks into their shared room, shirtless from just getting out of the shower. A simple white towel wrapped around his lean torso is the only thing censoring the spectacular scene. Messing his hair with a second towel, he chucks the wet fabric at Mark's face.

"Fuck off," Mark swings it back at the sophomore. This year, he chose to live in a suit with the rest of the guys to save some money. Him and Jeno shared a room while Ten and Haechan occupied the other. It's undeniably small and only has one bathroom, but he is grateful he at least doesn't have to room with Haechan anymore.

Mark's phone buzzes with a notification on his nightstand. Propping himself up with his elbow, he checks to see who it's from.

1 new message from unknown

Mark sighs. If it's these crazy girls again he's going to get really annoyed. Today was a really good day and the last thing he wants is another stranger asking him to father her children. 

Maybe: Yuna?: hey mark, it's Yuna. I got your number from the group chat! If you're not too busy I'd love to talk to you about a few things

Oh crap.

Suddenly nervous, Mark scrambles to sit up properly.

"Text from your new girlfriend?," Jeno taunts unknowingly.

"No, dickhead, it's Yuna," Mark rebuts, thinking hard about a good, casual reply.

"Oh, shit," Jeno states, taken aback. The sophomore swaggers onto his own bed, now sporting a pair of grey sweatpants and a fitted white t-shirt. The bare minimum makes him look like a poster boy every magazine photographer would clamber for. The man could put all models out of work if he had the heart for it. Fortunately, he only has the heart for hockey, video games, and pizza.

Mark: Hey Yuna! What's up?

Yuna: Hey :) nothing much! Not to freak you out, but I know all about your crush on y/n from Ten

Mark: ahaha... yeah I figured

Yuna: ok, so as her best friend and someone who cares about her a lot I just wanna put a few things out there

Yuna: is typing...

Mark watched as the three dots of the impending message taunted him. What could she be talking about? What if you have a boyfriend and Yuna's telling you to back off?

Yuna: if you're going to get close with her, you gotta make sure you keep her safe from those crazy fangirls. Y/N is a shy and sensitive girl she'll definitely take the hate to heart and if Hillary and those other crazy bitches come after her, I won't let you live

Hillary? Mark wracks his brain for any memory of a girl with that name. That girl from calc? No, that's Helen. Hillary...

An image of a mousy girl with red bangs comes into his mind. Ah yes, that's Hillary. She sends him love tweets and gave him chocolates for Valentine's Day.

Mark: I barely know Hillary and I'm pretty sure I've told her I'm not into her, but i'll make sure she knows. Yuna I'm serious about y/n

Yuna: as you should be! She's a real diamond in the rough and she's never confident in herself. All she does is work and study and practice. She never does anything for herself but she never complains either. Also, I don't wanna butt in too much, but I gotta you ask one thing

Mark: yeah ask away!

Yuna: y/n says today is the first time she met you but Ten says you've "been simping for like a year". Add it up for me?

Mark: It's kind of hard to explain... it like... do you believe in love at first sight?

Yuna: HA!!! You're too cute omg

Mark: It's like that but I never had the chance to talk to her... it never seemed right idk

Yuna: boy

Yuna: I had to force y/n to go to your game with me and Ten had to bribe Haechan to set up the picnic today early

Yuna: not to mention we made Hope and Jeno sit together even though they're both awkward just so y/n would have to sit next to you. you better make ur fucking move now

Mark curls his fingers into his blow-dried hair, letting out a low, stressed groan. He's gonna owe the guys big time.

Mark: I really appreciate it! :)))

Yuna: oh and one more thing

Mark: yeah?

Yuna: If you hurt her, I will gouge out your eyeballs and stick them up your ass and while you cry, I'll force feed you your own severed balls until you choke and die. Got it? :D

Holy fuck.

Mark: understood

Yuna: Yay!!! Approved :) good night mark! Nice getting to know you today!

Mark: same here. Night!

Mark's thumbs shake as he types out his final message. So this is what your friends are like, huh? It's such a contrast to your easy-going attitude. A smile spreads across his lips at the thought of you again.

Stretching up to shut off the lamp on his night stand, Mark tucks himself into bed. It's finally happening. You're here. You're right within his grasp. And he wants nothing more than to give you everything you need.

Mark contemplates Yuna's messages as he lay there in the dark; she said you aren't confident in yourself. This comes as a surprise to him. You're so beautiful, smart, kind, funny, and talented, the last thing he expected was that you didn't know it. You exude put-togetherness and wear elegance like a favorite sweater.

His eyes squeeze shut as Mark replays the first night he saw you in his mind. The image is engraved in his brain as he must have revisited that unintentional performance a thousand times.

This whole time, he never got to know you, but today he dipped his hand in the water. And he wanted so much more, to dive in completely and surround himself with you. All this time, he's only been on the sidelines.

I want her so bad

It's time to stop waiting around and get in the game. He's going to talk to you, walk you to class, make you feel special. So much time has already been wasted due to his own fears and misunderstandings. If it's confidence you need, it's confidence he will give you.

Wait for me, y/n, I'm gonna do it right this time

previous || m.list || next 

[thewholesomebean]

Over the Years

Since ao3 went down for maintenance right when I went to post this, I'm just gonna post this here for now.

-

September 21, 2009

We met when we were seven.

I had just moved to a small town named Hampton, Arkansas, thanks to my dad’s new job. When I walked into the classroom, he was the first person to talk to me. He asked me if I knew what today’s date was.

Of course, I did. September 21st, 2009.

He thanked me, introducing himself as Lucas. I told him my name was Cecilia. He struggled to pronounce it, but that was okay. He was 7 years old, the same as me, but I was a few months older.

Even though we had only exchanged a few words, he asked if we could be friends. I agreed. He was my first friend here, and he seemed pretty nice. He sat next to me in class and played with me at recess. We had playdates and went to the park together.

We didn’t have many other friends, but we didn’t really care. We had each other.

----------------------------

July 3, 2012

He told me he didn’t feel like a boy when we were ten.

He said being called a boy felt wrong, but he didn’t know what the word for that was. I didn’t either. I wanted to help though, so I borrowed my dad’s computer and looked it up with him. We learned that the word was transgender, and he told me he wanted to be a girl.

She asked if I could call her another name. I agreed, and we spent the rest of the night looking up name ideas. She chose Ava. I told her it was a pretty name. She said she didn’t want to tell our parents, and I was okay with that. She didn’t have to.

When she came over to my house, we’d play dress up and do each other’s makeup and hair. She had to keep her hair short, but I was still able to braid it a little. We learned new words, too.

We learned about queer people and found out there were other people like her. There were a lot of labels people used to describe who they liked and what their gender was. We had heard people, mainly adults and older kids, toss around the word “gay”, but now we actually knew what it meant.

She asked me if I knew who I liked, and I told her I wasn’t sure yet. She didn’t either. We agreed to tell each other once we knew.

----------------------------

November 17, 2015

We were thirteen when we told our parents about it.

My parents accepted Ava and said she was free to come to them if she needed anything. Hers did not. They told her she was a boy, and that she always would be one. She spent that night at my house. I didn’t know how to help her, but she looked so sad, so I tried my best to come up with something to cheer her up.

I gave her one of my dresses and we went outside and I set my phone on the ground. I had set up a playlist of our favorite songs, and we spent the next hour twirling around the backyard, barefoot in fancy dresses that were meant for picture day.

I think I started to fall for her that day. I didn’t know it at the time though. As we sat on the grass, our dresses stained as we looked up at the sky and counted the stars, all I could think about was how much I wanted to protect her. I wanted to keep all the bad things away from her and make sure she was never sad.

I hated her parents. I know people say hate is a strong word, but it fits. They were so mean to her, and nobody could explain to me why when I asked.

Even if they didn’t love her as she was, I did. And I wanted her to know that.

----------------------------

October 31, 2016

We were fourteen when I figured out what my sexuality was.

She still didn’t have a word for hers, and that was okay. I was bisexual. I liked boys, and girls, and anyone else. I didn’t make a big deal out of it when I told my parents. They had already told me they would accept me no matter what. I wish Ava’s parents would do the same.

A lot of things were different compared to when we first met, but some things never changed. She still struggled to pronounce my name, but now she called me Celia.

We had always called each other nicknames, but now they were special for us. We didn’t let other people use them. Her favorites to call me were Robin and Darling. I liked to call her Mouse and Pipi.

I can’t remember when or how we came up with those, but they were for us. Nobody else could use them.

----------------------------

June 14, 2017

We were fifteen when we went to our first pride parade.

Ava’s parents were out of town, so she was staying with my family. She borrowed one of my dresses and I did her makeup and we went together. My parents trusted us enough to go by ourselves. We wore the matching flower crowns we had gotten at the Renaissance Faire a year or two ago.

Everyone there was so nice, and we both felt more accepted than ever.

This was when she told me she thought she liked me. She still didn’t know what her sexuality was, but she knew she liked me and that was that. We decided we were going to try out dating that same day.

That was also the day she showed me songs she had been writing. It was on the walk home, and she was teaching me about the way the songs were meant to be sung and the meaning behind each of them.

I didn’t exactly know how to sing, nor did I understand sheet music much other than the small stuff our music teacher taught us, but she was so excited that it was hard to not listen.

Maybe one day, I’ll learn how to sing. Just for her.

----------------------------

May 20, 2018

We were supposed to be sixteen when her parents gave me the note.

They didn’t explain it and left the house before I could read it. I’m glad they left. If they hadn’t, I’m not quite sure what I would have said to them. I couldn’t believe what it said at first, but it was in Ava’s handwriting. The thought of my closest friend being gone was already terrifying enough, but now it had come true.

Part of my mind wanted me to blame myself. It said that it was my fault, that I should have noticed the signs, that I should have checked in on her more.

The only other time I saw her parents that week was when they dropped off a box of belongings she had wanted me to have. I recognized every single one of them.

The rainbow bracelet that I had made a game out of trying to steal. The crystal collections she had always wanted to find new additions for. Her notebooks full of songs and doodles. Everything that I had fallen in love with.

I decided I wouldn’t let her memory die, even if it hurt to remember her sometimes.

I wore the bracelet all of the time, only taking it off at times where it could get damaged. I put her collections on display and added new crystals that I found every chance I got. I taught myself how to sing a read sheet music, learning the songs she had written.

Her parents got her cremated and sent me a necklace with her ashes in it. I wore it constantly.

I kept every part of her with me, set on making sure people remembered her how she would have wanted to be remembered. It’s what she deserved.

----------------------------

August 7, 2019

She would have been seventeen when I performed one of her songs for the first time.

It was just a small performance at the very same pride parade we had confessed at, and yet it felt like so much more. It was a beautiful song, and I was so happy that I managed to bring it to life.

It took a lot of work, but it was worth it to see how many people related to the message or found the backstory of the song sad but beautiful in a way. I still hadn’t learned many of her songs other than that one, but I planned to learn as many as possible.

It’s what she would have wanted. It’s what she deserves.

----------------------------

December 19, 2021

I’m nineteen now.

She would be, too.

I spent her birthday sitting by her grave singing her songs for her. I’ve been doing covers of songs recently, too. I use a few of them to bring awareness to the trans community. I still can’t write my own songs, but I have plenty of hers to learn. She filled multiple notebooks up with her songs anyway.

She deserves to have her songs shared with the world, and I’m glad I can make that happen. I haven’t spoken with her parents since the day they gave me the note.

It now rests on my desk, in better condition than some of my more important papers. I can’t make myself get rid of it. It was the last thing she ever wrote for me, and I want to keep it.

I reread it sometimes if only to see the words at the very bottom. The ones smudged from tears and written shakily. Those words held more meaning than anything else on that old piece of paper.

“I love you, Cecilia.”

[sweetestlamb]

Caged Bird

Summary: “I should let him go right?” 

Author’s note: Finally back with another chapter, this one was a bit harder for me than the other chapters because writer’s block was a bish and I kept second guessing myself. I erased so many things and I don’t know if I am even proud of this anymore or if it’s any good LOL but I spent all day writing it so I guess I should post it. I’m not losing motivation but life was beating on my door and I feel like this wasn’t as fleshed out as I wanted it to be but I don’t have the time to flesh it out more and I really didn’t want to go another week without writing, it makes me anxious to leave them unattended for so long.  So if you like anything about this let a girl now. 

“You told him?” Sujin glances over at Su-ah from her place on her bed, her phone idle on the bed, she’s trying not to text a certain someone too much but that is proving easier said then done with him messaging her without any discretion or care about appearances. 

Jukyeong looks knowingly at her phone with a soft smile and she hides the small square too embarrassed even though they hadn’t been talking about anything inappropriate, he was teasing her that she wore his sweaters more than he did these days and asking her if she wanted to go shopping with him so she could pick out exactly which sweater she wanted to steal borrow. She rolls her eyes at the dramatic message, she didn’t take that many of his sweaters, he was just overexaggerating as he was wont to do. She folds the sleeve of her borrowed(thank you very much) sweater over her hands and pointedly avoids looking at the vibrating device. 

She has self control. 

But a second vibration makes her flaunter for a minute, wondering if he’s saying something important he hardly ever double texts these days. She reaches for the phone gasping when it’s suddenly snatched out of her reach. 

“Hey-!” her voice trails off bashfully at the glower on Su-ah’s pretty face, that’s her take no shit face, damn. She sits up straighter giving the girl all her attention lest she become more agitated and try to read the messages, that would be too unsettling. They had both already commented on her recent oversized sweaters, coyly trying to get her to admit to who they truly belonged to. She ignored their teasing and jut her nose in the air each time, they already knew and she refused to give them the satisfaction of saying it out loud. 

“Focus on us for one minute. Your boyfriend can wait.” Su-ah states firmly putting her phone on the small desk behind her and she sputters at the comment, red hot flush barreling down her entire body like a wildfire. 

“He’s not my boyfriend!” She denies vehemently, cheeks burning hotter from the nonplussed looks she receives from her two closest friends, Su-ah looks utterly unimpressed and Jukyeong can barely contain the smile spreading on her full lips, she opens her mouth to argue harder needing to smother the jolt of pure bliss that surfaced in her belly at the other girl’s bold proclamation but the words get firmly lodged in her throat. 

His hands tightly wound around hers, his thumb gently caressing the rough skin of her scarred knuckles. The way she didn’t want to pull away or hide from him, he was looking at her, truly seeing her and instead of fear something warmer spread through her veins. 

Those lips on her forehead, the softest sweetest kiss she had ever received in her life. Nobody had ever held her like she was something precious before but that was how he pressed her to his wide chest, her head nuzzled into his fragrant neck as she drowned in his intoxicating scent nervous to breathe him in too much lest she get lost in his spell. 

The deep rumble of his voice as he called her “baby”, she had always rolled her eyes hearing couples use such supercilious nicknames with each other, what was the point? Why did being in a couple have to mean that you lost your name and essentially a piece of your identity? It was stupid and childish and she wanted nothing to do with such a transgression, or so she had believed. 

Until the moment he called her princess. 

What started out as a tease had transformed into something bigger than she had ever expected, she hated it or so she told herself. But when he called her Sujin in the park she felt like a part of her was missing, she wasn’t just Sujin to him anymore. In that moment she had a grand realization she wasn’t losing herself like she had initially thought but rather gaining another layer, she would always be Sujin and that was enough but she could also be his princess, his baby.  

When had she turned into such a sap? This was all his fault. 

“Hello? Sujin? Are you even listening to me? Hey! Are you seriously fantasizing about your boyfriend right now?” She jumps at Su-ah’s loud voice, slapping a frantic hand over her mouth and looking around as if people will materialize out of thin air. 

“Can you stop saying that word, Suho might hear you!” She stage whispers and Su-ah raises a thin eyebrow at her shoving her hand away. 

“Why are you so red? Did something happen between you two, you can’t hide anything from us! What happened to “we’re just friends”? She blushes redder at Su-ah’s quotation marks and Jukyeong leans forward excitedly, “Have things changed? Did you tell him how you feel? Oh my god, did you guys...kiss?!”

Su-ah stills at Jukyeong’s question before vibrating violently in her seat and grabbing her shoulders shaking her back and forth, “Sujin did you lose your lip virginity? Did you let him deflower you?!” 

Sitting stunned and wide eyed, she stares at her friends expectant faces wondering how the conversation became derailed so quickly? She had invited them both over to explain the Baekyung situation and her conversation with Suho’s father but somehow Seojun had become the star of the night. 

“Are you crazy why would you call it that?” She immediately realizes her mistake when both girls turn to look at each other and simultaneously shriek, “She didn’t deny it!,” and she watches in horror as they jump up and starting dancing around the room, then she groans and tugs the hood of the sweater over her head pulling the drawstrings so she is cocooned in the fabric as they start singing off key, “Sujin kissed Seojun! Sujin kissed Seojun!” 

Instinctively she grabs a fluffy pillow and flings it across the room in a perfect arch before it lands with a soft thud on Jukyeong’s head, time stops as they all stare at each other and then it’s a flurry as the girl picks up the pillow launching it back and that is how Sujin gets involved in her first ever pillow fight. There are pillows flying every which way and Su-ah and Jukyeong gang up on her, shoving her into the bed and playfully smacking her on her stomach and back as she curls up in a ball body shaking from her laughter. 

“Tell us everything and we’ll stop hitting you.” Su-ah promises and she shakes her head in refusal, seconds later she feels a grazing on her sides and she knows what’s coming so she tries to draw away but her means of escape are thwarted by Jukyeong grabbing her by the shoulders and pressing her harder into the bed. 

“Su-ah please don’t. This is evil, I thought we were friends.” She pleads staring up at both with beguiling eyes and for a minute she thinks her puppy eyes have succeeded as both release her, but then she feels a barrage of hands on her side and laughter is forcefully pulled from her body as she twitches in a fit, twisting and turning from the hands but to no avail. She feels tears pooling in her eyes from the sensation and this is how Suho finds them, tangled up and breathless from laughter and he stares at them in shock. 

“When you guys are done...doing this can you please respond to Seojun? He thinks you suddenly got into an accident or got kidnapped because you stopped responding to him.” 

Su-ah turns to her with a look of triumph on her mischievous face, “That sounds like boyfriend behavior to me.” 

Suho doesn’t reply except for a twitch in his lip before he slides the door closed behind him, giving them privacy again. 

She tries not to rush to her phone but her eyes find their eye over to the device all the way across the room, maybe if she runs really quickly she can make it past the two girls and lock herself in the bathroom? 

“I know that look. Whatever crazy plot you’re cooking up is unnecessary, you can have your phone back. I know you two hate to be apart,” Su-ah teases leaning over and then handing her the phone, she stares at it worried that accepting it will be admittance to Su-ah’s claims she hesitates to take it. 

Su-ah takes the choice away from her when she places the phone in her outreached hands, “Don’t keep him waiting.” She holds the phone flat in her palms looking up at both her friends, they have identical smiles on their faces and warmth blossoms in her belly. 

She’s happy, this is what happiness feels like. 

But she’s also overwhelming nervous, she has never done this before, never had someone who made her feel this way. Was it supposed to be this terrifying? Putting the phone down resolutely she turns to her best friends needing their advice. 

“I have no idea what I’m doing.” She admits, feeling small and more than a little bit lost. Instantly she is squished in the middle as they both come to sit by her sandwiching her in between them, twin arms thrown over her shoulders. 

“We know you’re scared but he likes you, everyone can see that. When you’re in a room together it’s like he doesn’t see anyone else, you are always his focal point.” Jukyeong whispers softly placing her head on her shoulder and she wants to deny that but too many images flash in her mind of him doing just that, him dropping everything and racing to her even in the beginning when she had been a mess and constantly pushed him away. Intimate moments at lunch where his eyes hardly leave her as he ardently watches her eat the food that he had prepared just for her, despite countless girls watching him and squealing his name in the distance. 

Everyone had eyes for him, but he only had eyes for....her. 

“What if all of this becomes too much for him and he wants someone normal? Someone who doesn’t have all my baggage? Being with me must get exhausting.” She’s still talking about Seojun but a small piece of her is also directing this statement to them, was being her friend as exhausting? Did they ever consider just abandoning her and finding someone who didn’t have such tiresome issues? 

“You still don’t understand do you?” 

She turns towards Su-ah who blinks wet eyes at her and suddenly her eyes feel moist too. 

“Understand what?” 

“How much you mean to us. All of us. Nobody could ever replace you, we don’t care about your baggage, we want to help you carry it all.” 

She blinks and stares straight ahead, scared of breaking apart. 

Is that how Seojun felt too? Was she worth the trouble to him too? 

When had her life ever been so simple?

They all jump when her phone vibrates again and this time she doesn’t hesitate immediately picking it up, expecting to see another message from the boy in question but instead a new number appears. She stares blankly at first before suddenly recognizing the number. 

“Who’s that?” Su-ah questions, staring at her phone with pursed lips and she swipes the message open. 

Dinner tonight? 

It feels strange to see that message beneath Seojun’s and she finds herself closing it without responding and opening Seojun’s plethora of messages instead. 

I was just joking you can steal all my sweaters. 

Are you still there?

Princess?

Can you answer me so I know you’re alive? 

He is so dramatic, she doesn’t message him for ten minutes and he’s already thinking the worst but then she remembers all the times he has found her helpless and trembling in the rain and his fear makes more sense. Smiling in understanding she finally replies, I’m okay you worrywart. Su-ah and Jukyeong are here, I got distracted. 

ignoring social norm he responds to her immediately not the least bit concerned with appearing too invested. 

Don’t scare me like that. I was about to come over. 

“Sujin are you sure Seojun is okay with you going on dates with Baekyung, that’s who text you right?” Her head snaps up at the question, she bites her lip in consideration. 

“He said he understood. He knows I’m only doing it to help him. But tonight is the last time.” 

She shouldn’t be concerning herself with anyone else’s problems, hers were enough on their own. But she couldn’t help it, the other boy was going through the same ordeal as her and she saw herself in his cold numb eyes, he was existing instead of living. She knew what that felt like. She understood him all too well. 

“Why does he need your help?” Jukyeong asks innocently and she stills before shaking her head, “It’s not my story to tell.” 

They don’t ask anymore questions and she’s grateful for that. 

She has to get ready for her date, she can’t help but wish it was with someone else. She doesn’t even want to call it a date, now that she has someone that she wants to do this all with. 

She looks beautiful, she always does and he wonders if he might have genuinely liked her if they met under different circumstances? He had never learned what it meant to care for someone, too busy trying to survive but she understood him, they had so much in common. He didn’t like her-his heart wasn’t capable of such emotions he was convinced- but he felt a certain kinship that he’d never felt before with anyone else, maybe they were meant to met each other. 

Could she be his destiny? 

“I need to talk to you.” He stares at her across the table looking effortlessly elegant and he takes a sip of his water, something akin to dread pooling in the pit of his stomach. 

“Talk then,” he answers gruffier than he intended but he can see the apology on her face and his vicious side is making an appearance in anticipation of whatever she wants to say to him. She stares at him for a long time and he wonders if she is second guessing or simply searching for the right words, annoyance surges in the wake of her hesitation he is not some child who needs sugared words or placation. “Just say it already,” he says snarkily and her eyes harden at his harsh tone, that’s more like it he hates to be pitied. 

“This is our last...gathering. I can’t help you anymore. I am doing something about my situation and I think you should too.” 

Rage builds up in his veins until he can see nothing but red, he thought he finally found someone who understood but here she was judging him and already abandoning him and all for what, some pretty boy idiot who would never understand what it meant to struggle? They were two sides of the same coin and nobody could ever truly love them, how could she not see that? At birth they had been deemed unlovable by their own parents and there was no way to undo that fate, it was best to just accept the hand they had been dealt. 

“Do you think he really likes you?” He asks meanly sneering at her with a curled lip, this reminds him too much of Dan-oh, of that stinging rejection and the way she wanted nothing to do with him- too lost in her fucking precious Haru-ah and he can’t stop the vicious words that are falling from his mouth, “You’re just a charity case to him. Like a sick puppy he found outside, he doesn’t like you he just feels sorry for you. It’s pathethic.” 

The words land exactly how he intended. 

She looks angry but that fades to consternation and then doubt builds in her eyes and he knows he was successful, he has planted a seed of doubt in her mind and that will only manifest bigger and bigger until she cracks under the pressure.  

“You’re wrong.” She states but she doesn’t sound certain, he can hear the question at the end and he smiles mentally. He almost feels bad but then the image of the other boy smiling with his perfect family flashes in his mind and any guilt he feels melts away. Why should he have it all when he, Baekyung had nothing? 

“I’m not. You’re just a phase for him, he probably think he’s being nice pretending to like you. I’ve seen all those girls around him, why would he want someone whose weak broken and whose parents don't even want her? Don’t be naïve, it’s beneath you Sujin. People like us need to know our place.” 

He stifles the little voice in the back of his mind that questions why he’s pushing away someone who only wants to be free, why did she get to escape the prison that they both had been locked in for so many years? Why couldn’t she just accept that they didn’t deserve anyone else and just be with him? Why was he always the last possible choice? 

She doesn’t say another word, opening her wallet and throwing down enough money to cover the meal that hasn’t even been brought out yet. The cold look she shoots his way stops him from saying anything, he can see the hurt in her eyes and it’s twisted but he feels a tinge of satisfaction at her expression. 

He watches her walk away feeling no better than his father, when had he become such a monster and why didn’t it scare him more? 

What did that say about him? 

The sound of the doorbell echoes through the spacious house and she wonders if it’s Sujin, and that mere possibility is enough to make her race to the door before her husband can make his way from his seclusion in his study. Most day he didn’t even bother coming out and when he did he didn’t even acknowledge her, it was heaven but it also left her guarded waiting from him to explode and hit her. It was like living in a landmine, she walked lightly as to not be heard. 

The face on the other side of the door completely shocks her. 

Lee Joo-Hun stands there, looking determined and she stares blankly at him. It has been months since their families have shared a meal together, she saw his visible discomfort every time her husband would berate her or Sujin. Many people showed discomfort but few did anything to help them, it was human nature after all. 

Better you than me. 

She forces a brittle smile to form on her face. Playing the role of happy wife easily, its a role she has been cultivating for years. 

“Oh. I didn’t know you had plans with my husband today. Come on in.” She notices that there is a certain unexplained tension in his shoulders but after only a moment’s pause he nods before stepping over the threshold, slipping off his expensive loafers and not bothering to put on the slippers they have placed for guest. Maybe he doesn’t plan to stay for long. 

“I’ll go get him,” she says softly wanting to do nothing of the sort, she has not been on his radar as of late and she had every intention to keep things that way but she can’t show this to their guest. Her husband would be livid if she did anything to harm his relationship with someone he saw as a beneficial business partner. She’s unprepared for the hand that stops her, tight around her wrist she has to force herself not to flinch at the sudden touch. 

When she looks back, his eyes are wide and they penetrate through her and she snatches her hand back a fear rippling through her at his stare, he’s looking right through her like she’s made of glass. 

“Sorry,” he apologizes and she smiles nervously waving him off, “I was just surprised you didn’t do anything wrong.” But he’s peering at her like he knows everything racing through her mind and she has to glance away, it’s all a bit too much and suddenly the study door opens and all the air is siphoned from the room as her husband exits the room, his face changing quickly when he notices that they have a guest, she knows that the rage that first appeared will make return once they are alone again. 

“Why didn’t you tell me that we had a guest?” The inquiry is said innocuously enough, he has long mastered repressing his rage in front of others but she can see the anger in his brows. 

Before she can answer, Joo-hun stands between them blocking her completely from her husband’s gaze. 

“Let’s talk.” Her husband raises a brow at the commanding tone and she can read him as easily as a book, he’s furious at being spoken to in such a tone but the other man doesn’t give him an opportunity to disobey because he’s already walking into the study. Her husband glares at her as if she is to blame before disappearing into the room and shutting the door in her face. 

Without a conscious thought she presses her ear against the door but the wood is solid and she can barely hear anything and she leans back about to admit defeat but then the voices raise becoming progressively louder and she hears her husband shout, tone bristling with fury, “How dare you threaten me in my own home!” and the loud booming voice of Joo-hun rings out, “You disgust me and I will do everything imaginable to make sure you end up where you belong.”

The temperature drops at those chilling words and she takes a step back at the sound of movement behind the door, once again coming face to face with the man.

His expression softens when he sees her but she can still see a glint of hardness beneath the surface. He had expressive eyes, they were part of the reason he had been such a celebrated actor. 

He knows. 

She’s certain now, he knows what a monster she is. 

If her husband deserves to suffer then so does she for everything she has done to her poor little girl, she was just as culpable if not more. If only she hadn’t been a coward and left when he first started hitting her, if only she had gone through with the abortion. She had selfishly brought a child into this world knowing that their life would be hell just like hers because she was scared to be alone. She wasn’t a mother, she wasn’t even fit to be called a human at this point and the look he gives her makes her feel like scum on the bottom of his shoe. 

“I’m leaving.” He announces walking back over to his shoes, and she had been right he wasn’t planning on staying long. 

A loud bang suddenly fills the empty void, her husbands scream are not too far behind as he flings books and whatever he can get his hands on into the walls. 

She knows what fate awaits her tonight. 

This is her punishment and it’s exactly what a stain like her deserves. 

She stares absently at the ground, the sound of the door knob turning reaching her ears and she knows that she’s going to be alone again. The door opens and she sighs, waiting to hear the door close knowing that in seconds she will be a whimpering mess on the ground. 

But the sound never comes, and she looks up to see what’s stopping him and his eyes are still hard but not as sharp. 

“Come with me.” 

She hears the word but the sentence does not compute and it takes a moment for her to process what he just said, her mind tells her that surely she heard him wrong. There’s no way he said what she thought he said. 

But then he reaches out a hand and she stares at his palm. 

“Why would you want to help me? I’m not a victim. I knew what he was doing, I knew everything and I did nothing. I am just as bad as him. She hates me too. I didn’t protect her.” 

It’s the truth, she lost the right of calling herself a victim as she watched her husband step on her seven year old daughter and her first thought was thank goodness it’s not me. That was the day the light left Sujin’s eyes but hope didn’t fade completely not yet, but each time her father hit her those huge eyes would look her way and each time her heart constricted but helplessness stopped her from acting. It took years but all that youthful hope was extinguished and she never heard that word again, “mother” it seemed fitting since she had never been a mother to the girl. 

“I don’t understand why you did what you did. But it’s not my place to judge, despite what you think you are a victim and I am done turning a blind eye. Staying here won’t help Sujin, she needs her mother.” 

Sujin needs her? That sounds laughable but then a distant conversation resurfaces in her memory and she feels frustrated tears welling in her eyes. 

“What does it mean to be a mother? I can’t answer that question for you but the fact that you’re asking that means you want to try, so do that. Try your best and apologize when you’re wrong. That’s all mothers can do.” 

The woman looked so fragile laying in the hospital bed but the strength of her words were undeniable, she didn’t know what made her visit she knew if her husband caught her there would be retribution but she couldn’t stay away. She didn’t even have an excuse and they simply stared at each other before the other woman smiled at her and motioned for her to sit on the chair, she had done so without question. 

There were flowers all over the room, both fresh and old. 

“Someone must really love you.” She had said and she watched jealously as a maternal smile graced her face, she could almost feel the motherly pride. 

“Sometimes my son gets carried away.” 

The boy on the motorcycle, she had thought he was just a delinquent but the amount of flowers in the room said otherwise.

That was ultimately what pushed her to ask the silly question: what does it mean to be a mother? 

She had never known, her own mother had treated her like a bargaining chip that would lead to the betterment of her own life, naming her fortune only to force her to have anything but that in her life. 

The woman had smiled delicately before answering her. 

The words swirled around like a tornado in her mind, she hadn’t expected such a simple answer. 

“Are you coming?” Joo-hun’s voice brings her back to reality and she thinks about Sujin and the day she was born and how small and vulnerable she looked laying in her arms as they both cried, wailing their hearts out. 

She hadn’t known what it meant to be a mother back then and she’s no closer to knowing now but she knows that she wants to try, Sujin might never forgive her for what she did and she wouldn’t blame her. But she still wanted to try, even if it took her whole life she would spend it trying to repent for all her sins. 

She takes one small step forward, the shackles that have been tightened around her body her whole life crumbling in the face of her renewed hope.  

I want to try. 

She isn’t wearing his sweater, it’s pitiful but that’s the first thing he notices when he sees Sujin in the morning, she’s walking alone and he can’t stop the joy that shoots through him at the observation it was never easy to see her arrive with the other boy despite knowing the truth. But today the encroacher is nowhere to be seen and he settles the kickstand of his motorcycle before rushing over to her, without thinking he wraps an arm around her shoulder but then he feels her body tighten at the unexpected touch, “Relax, it’s just me,” he whispers airily but to his disappointment her body becomes more rigid at his words. 

He immediately removes his arm, moving out of her personal space- not understanding what exactly is going on but still not wanting to be the source of her discomfort. 

He shifts apprehensively, already wrecking his brain to think of what he might have done to warrant such a bitter cold reception from her but coming up emptyhanded. So instead of trying to guess and create his own reasons, he asks her, “Are you okay? Did I do something?” 

He can tell she’s going to lie before she even opens her mouth, he watches the swarm of emotions play across her face before she settles on nonchalance, “No. I’m fine, you surprised me. I don’t want to upset your fangirls so I think it’s best if we avoid each other at school.” He stares at her in shock, wondering if this is the same girl who he held on the bench just days ago her lips soft on his cheek and her perfume filling his senses? 

“I already told you I don’t care about them. You already know that I only care about yo-” 

“Stop. I can’t do this right now I need space, I have to go.” She interrupts him and after a long gaze she stalks away and he wants to follow her, nothing she’s doing is making any sense not after everything they’ve been through. He’d given her everything he could offer and it still wasn’t enough, she was still walking away and he was tired of chasing her, if it was that easy to walk away from him time and time again then maybe he was fighting a losing battle. 

He turns around, walking the other direction. 

He misses the dark eyes that follow him over a small shoulder. He doesn’t look back. This time he chooses self-preservation. 

He doesn’t go to lunch, unable to bear the thought of sitting across from Sujin and pretending that he’s okay when he feels like a hollow fruit. So he escapes to the roof top and instant regret fills him as he remembers all those months ago when he had held the other on this very roof, it had been so different from their hug at the hospital and the hug in the rain. Those hugs were filled with what he thought was affection, but now he doesn’t really know. He can’t understand why she’s suddenly pushing him away again when he thought they had overcome all the barriers between them. 

Was it because of her father? Had she only kept him by her side because he had helped her but now that Suho and his father were on her side she realized that she no longer needed him? It pains him to imagine that this could be true but the thought rolls around in his thoughts until he starts to believe it, that has to be it. Was he that expendable to her? 

Clearly the answer was, yes. 

The rooftop door suddenly bangs open and he hates his heart for speeding up, as he turns around piteously hoping to see her. HIs heart plummets when he’s greeted by a smiling face that’s nowhere as beautiful as the one he hoped to see, he tries futilely to hide his disappointment with a smirk. 

He recognizes the girl as one of the people who have confessed to him in the past months, she wasn’t as nervous as the others but it had taken her a few minutes to stutter the words out and he had gently turned her down, he wasn’t cruel because he knew how terrifying it was liking someone and not knowing if it was reciprocated. 

She shuffles anxiously on her feet and he wonders how she knew he was up here. Sometimes the girls at school made him uneasy, their fixation with him wasn’t normal. 

He watches at she inhales deeply before looking at him with an unwavering gaze. 

“I know that you said that you liked someone else and I respect that. But I haven’t seen you dating anyone and I just like you so much you’re all I can think about and .....Cantyoujustgivemeachanceifshedoesntlikeyouback?” 

It takes an extra moment to decipher what she said with the rapid speed that she expels the words and he stares at her, her breathe coming out in short winded puffs like she just ran a marathon. 

He steps forward purposely, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder before answering her, thoughts of Sujin’s sudden rejection permeating his mind. 

She walks away stunned by his reply and he doesn’t go down until the bell rings, he still isn’t prepared to be in the same room as Sujin but he can’t avoid her forever. 

The classroom is abuzz, he can hear excited voices as he walks down the hallway and he wonders what bit of gossip has their attention now, he slides the door open only to feel all eyes land on him. The class goes silent before suddenly he’s being bombarded with questions. 

“Is it true?” 

“Why her? I liked you before she did.” 

“Are you finally going to get a girlfriend? It’s not fair you shouldn’t only date one person oppa.” 

He ignores them all sliding into his seat and dropping his head onto the table, when they realize that he has no plans of answering their invasive prompts they go back to gossiping about him as if he’s not sitting right there. 

He rubs his temple, trying to stop the head ache he can feel forming but he knows that it’s already too late. 

The energy shifts in the room and without looking up he already knows why, he can hear the telltale clicks of her shoes on the floor. 

He hears Su-ah’s voice shortly after, “What are you all so excited about? Did something happen?” 

It’s vindictive but he wants them to hear the gossip so he finally looks up, eyes settled on Sujin who is already looking at him.

“Oh! Su-ah it’s the saddest news, Han Seojun is getting a girlfriend. He finally accepted a confession.” A girl whose name he doesn’t know wails as if her life is over and he watches the confusion morph on Su-ah’s face before he glances over at Sujin and she looks devastated and it suddenly he feels sick instead, what is he doing finding enjoyment in this? 

He can’t hold her gaze, he doesn’t know what the look on her face means and he doesn’t want to analyze it, he’s done doing this.   

“It’s just rumors.” Su-ah repeats this over and over like a mantra, but she can’t hear a word that the other girl is saying all she can think about is Seojun with someone else. She imagines him smiling and holding someone else, cradling their cheek as he kisses their forehead and wrapping them in his too big sweater while beaming down at them and it makes her rush to the bathroom, water scalding her hands before she can even think about what she’s doing. 

“Sujin no!” Jukyeong snatches her hand away from the too hot water and she only fights her for a moment before lets herself be pulled away, losing all her fight. 

“Calm down Sujin, talk to us. What happened between you two?” Su-ah asks firmly and gently and she can’t stop the diarrhea of words that explode from her mouth as she tells them everything, Baekyung and how much his words stuck in her mind and her doubts about Seojun and whether she could truly be loved by anyone much less someone as coveted as him. What right did she have to drag him down? 

He might like her now, think that he was aiding someone helpless but was that all this was? Was she just something to soothe his ego? 

“Do you really feel that way?”

She jumps at the harshness in Jukyeong’s tone, she has never heard the other girl talk like this before. She has never been anything but kind when speaking to her, the tone makes her head spin. 

“What?” She replies at a loss for words. 

“Do you really think that’s true? Do you believe the words you are saying right now?” Jukyeong presses harder and she stalls at her interrogation, not knowing what she thinks anymore she can barely trust her emotions- they change too quickly without her permission or consent. It makes her miss the days when she felt nothing, numbness overwriting all these pesky feelings. 

“I...I...I don’t know.” 

The silence drags on before she hears Jukyeong sigh heavily, “Then I think you should let him go.”

It’s the last thing she expects to hear especially from the ever optimistic girl and acid runs through her body at the mere suggestion. 

“What do you mean?”

“This isn’t fair Sujin, you can’t play with someone like this. You can’t push him away and then get jealous when someone else shows interest, he’s not some toy that you can pick up whenever you see fit. He is a person, who really cares about you. If you still don’t know what you feel for him then maybe it’s best to let him go.” 

She turns to look at Su-ah hopeful that the other girl will say the opposite, will implore her to fight for Seojun. She’s crushed when she sees a similar look on Su-ah’s face. It’s a mix of exasperation and pity, she hates it. 

They both think that she should let Seojun go. 

She leaves the bathroom with nothing in her mind, walking aimlessly back to class taking her seat and robotically pulling out her notebook. She doesn’t hear one word that the teacher says for the rest of the time, her heartbeat wildly thumping in her chest. 

When class ends it takes Su-ah calling her name a few times to break her from her stupor. 

“It’s time to go home.” 

“Oh.” She starts to put her books away in her bag, dropping one when Seojun walks past her table without a sideways glance, it’s like they are strangers again and that makes her want to scream because this was all her fault. 

“Wait.” 

She can’t bring herself to speak the word aloud and he leaves, walking away from her just like she had this very morning. 

He’s already speeding off on his motorcycle when she gets outside and she sees a girl beaming at his back, surrounded by a group of girls who are congratulating her and telling her how jealous they are. 

That must be her, the lucky girl. 

The one that had replaced her so easily. She stomps away ignoring Su-ah and Jukyeong’s cries of her name. She knows she has no right, none at all but she does it anyway she has to know if this is really the end. 

That’s how she finds herself outside of his apartment, staring at his motorcycle the proof that he is here and not out with the girl from school, it makes the unease in her stomach unfurl slightly. Staring up at the looming building she tries to think of what she can say to him, she should listen to Jukyeong what she was doing wasn’t fair but she can’t lose him, she had undid all the good in one fleeting moment because she didn’t trust them. Baekyung had said the words but she was the one who chose to believe them, the one that let those words wedge a divide between them and for that she was solely to blame. 

Saying sorry wouldn’t nearly be enough, but that’s all she can think of as she pushes the door open and calls for the elevator. 

The ride has never felt that long all the other times she has visited his apartment, but today it feels like an eternity but when she reaches his floor it feels too soon and she’s not ready. 

Which is exactly why the universe gives her no warning and as the doors open she meets his eyes, he looks notably surprised to see her there and takes a step back in his shock. 

Once she recovers from her own shock, she takes in his attire he’s no longer wearing his uniform- dressed in all black from head to toe like a grim reaper and she wonders if grim reapers are supposed to be that hot, absently she steps out of the elevator before the doors can close between them. Her tongue feels huge in her mouth as she openly gapes at him. 

“What are you doing here?”

“Where are you going?”

Their questions collide and his gaze sharpens once he processes her words, she knows she has no right to question him about anything and his cold look echoes that very sentiment. 

He scoffs at her and tries to circumvent around her and she feels the floodgates opening up in the face of his blatant disregard, “I know you’re tired of hearing this but I’m sorry.” 

His expression barely changes, as he folds his arms peering down at her. 

“Okay.” 

He tries to walk around her once more and this time she’s the one to invade his personal space, gripping his elbow to stop him from walking away from her. She has an irrational fear that if he walks away that this will be her last chance, it makes her let down her guard fully terrified she’ll never get another opportunity. 

“I was scared, that once you realized that I was always going to be this broken you wouldn’t want me anymore. Even if he goes to jail I’m always going to be like this, a broken fucking mess and how can I ask anyone else to deal with that? How can I ask you to give up on having a normal relationship with someone who won’t need therapy for the rest of their lives? I should give you up, everyone is right. I don’t deserve you. I don’t.” 

Despite her rapid blinking a few stray tears escape her tight hold and she watches the wall he put up around his heart gradually start to stilt away as his eyes opens up in the face of her palpable dismay. 

“Sujin.”

“Please let me finish, if I don’t say it now I’m scared I never will.”

He stares at her before nodding slowly. 

She takes a deep breathe before continuing, “I’m not good girlfriend material, no don’t argue I’m not. I will doubt us all the time and I won’t always talk to you about my feelings because I’ve spent so many years ignoring them, I only spoke to you last time because it involved your family. I knew I couldn’t keep that from you but this didn’t seem as important. I should be able to handle it on my own, I’m not a baby. I’m too impulsive and selfish and a coward and....I shouldn’t burden anyone with dating me.”

It looks like it’s taking everything in him not to rebuttal, because when it really matters he always listens to her. 

“I know that I haven’t made this easy on you and I should have just let things be-let you be with someone normal, but I can’t and I know why, I’ve always known why but I was too scared to admit it. I can’t just be friends with you anymore.....I want more.” 

She can’t believe it but the words are now out in the universe, the ones that she has been thinking for months and swallowing every time he showed her how much he cared about her, and he looks taken back by her confession, she hadn’t planned on saying that when she showed up but now it feels stupid to keep it to herself, if she’s going to lose him then she might as well be honest, at least once in her life. 

“Can I speak now?” 

She doesn’t know if she’s ready to hear what he has to say, but it’s only right since he listened to her, taking a centering breathe she nods at his inquiry preparing herself for the worst. 

“You are selfish.” 

Her heart sinks at his words, that isn’t a good start and even though he is merely echoing her words it burns deeper to hear them from him. 

“And impulsive and so damn confusing, you’re hot and then you’re so damn cold and I’m only human Sujin I can’t just pick myself up after you push me away every time, I get hurt too.”

She tries not to bristle at his tone and the lack of nicknames, feeling her heart sink into her stomach now. 

“When that girl confessed to be do you want to know what I thought?” 

She blinks at the sudden change in topic and her immediate answer is no, she does not want to know at all but he doesn’t even give her a moment to reply before he’s answering his own question. 

“I thought she is so straightforward and this is so different, I don’t have to guess about her feelings she wears them on her sleeve, this is so much easier being with her would be so much easier.” 

Her first real confession and rejection all in one day. She has always been an overachiever and it’s only fitting that this would be no different, blinking harshly she forces the tears to stop she has no right to make him feel guilty, everything he said was right and she couldn’t blame him for choosing the path of least resistance. 

“Thank you. For everything, I really mean it.” She bows at him before turning around, she can’t stay here for another minute not knowing that he’s no longer hers and probably never was in the first place. 

It’s all too cruel. 

She presses the button, she should just take the stairs but this will buy her a few extra minutes with him, it’s pitiable but she wants to savor every remaining moments. 

The elevator arrives, gleaming metal doors sliding open and she steps inside ready to go home and cry her eyes out. 

But then a large hands wraps around her wrist and she’s suddenly tugged backwards her back slamming into his chest. 

“Where are you going? Did I say I was finished?” His voice is rough in her ears and she can feel the rapid beat of his heart through his skin, it amps up her own racing heart too scared to even hope but she feels brittle and unsteady his body is the only thing keeping her upright. 

“Dating someone else would be easier, but the thing is I don’t want easy. I’ve never wanted easy, I just wanted you in anyway that I could have you. So why are you trying to “set me free”? Fuck that self sacrificing bullshit, you said it yourself you’re selfish so hold on to me and don’t let me go, when you have doubts hold on to me tighter. I’m not some caged bird that you’ve imprisoned, I’m the guy who likes you and that’s not going to change because you pushed me away. Do you feel feel that? That’s fear. You’re scared to lose me. Good, remember this feeling and how much it makes your heart ache and hold on to me tighter.”

She hiccups at his words, tears pouring down her cheeks now and she finds herself turning in his arms before her brain can catch up, relief washing over her so profoundly she sways a little on her feet. 

He has a shit eating grinning on his face as he stares down at her. 

“You didn’t accept her confession.”

He rolls his eyes at the statement, pulling her closer although there is no space left between them. 

“No I turned her down again but some girls saw us come from the roof top together and they started spreading rumors anyway and I couldn’t be bothered to stop them.” 

She stares unimpressed at him, reading between his lines and feeling foolish because she fell right into his trap. 

“You knew it would make me jealous.” 

He shrugs noncommittedly, “I hoped it would help bring you to your senses.” 

Has she been brought to her senses, she’s not sure she feels crazier than before his words echoing in her brain and she’s moving before she even knows what her intentions are, his smile starts to slip away and he releases her and makes an apprehensive retreat backwards and she automatically follows him, he steps back, she steps forward, another step back and she steps forward again, they do this dance until he’s pressed against the wall with nowhere else to run. 

“Why are you running?” 

He blinks looking dazed and she takes that opportunity to move in closer, cradling his face in her hands before leaning her head forward until only an inch separates them, a scratching noise comes from the wall and when she glances down she can see his nails digging into the paint, she hums at the sight and the implications. 

She was clawing at his resolve.  

Skin vibrating like a livewire she gently pulls him down, until they are eye level and their breaths are curling in the miniscule space between them, those feline eyes are darting all over her face before they land on her lips, she sinks her hands deeper into his hair. 

“Are you sure about this?” 

She has to ask one last time, this all feels like a dream and she’s terrified of waking up and finding that she imagined this all. 

He doesn’t answer at first, too busy staring a hole through her face but she waits patiently, remembering all the times he had waited for her. 

“What?”

“Can I really keep you? Do you really want to be mine?” 

It’s so cheesy and sappy and all kinds of ridiculous, nothing that she ever imagined for herself because she never thought anyone would make her want to say these kind of sweet nothings but here they are- and there’s no turning back now she waits for his reply with bated breath and this time he barely pauses for a second instantly answering, “I’ve been yours this whole time. Are you mine though can you let me in?” 

When you have doubts, hold on to me tighter. 

She drags him the rest of the distance between them, her lips barely grazing his own and it’s crazy because her lips are already on his, soft flesh upon flesh but it takes a moment to realize that she’s actually kissing him, she is kissing Han Seojun. They are kissing. 

She has no idea what she’s doing and she leans onto her tiptoes pressing more firmly against his mouth, imitating the kisses she has seen on tv and from couples in the hallway at school twisting her head to find a better angle but something still feels wrong and it takes another moment to realize what’s wrong. 

He is frozen on the wall, completely still under her ministrations. 

And she immediately pulls away, apologetic and feeling bone deep shame. 

“I’m sorry! I had no right to spring that on you, you barely forgave me and I did that. It won’t happen again, I promise.” 

His eyes are glossy and his cheeks are so red and it’s almost too beautiful to look at, how was she not supposed to kiss him when he was looking like that?

“Don’t apologize, you just made my brain short circuit. Come here.”  

She blushes bright at his too honest admittance, feeling giddy from the power that she seems to have over him. She had been scared that her inexperience would be off-putting for him. 

He tugs her back, letting her body block him in against the wall and she gasps at the warmth of his body he’s so hot even through the layers of clothes separating them. Her breath hitches when he starts to lean back down and this time when their lips meet it feels like the universe has righted itself, the stars and the moon are aligned and something clicks inside her like a gear snapping into its rightful place. 

It’s a simple kiss, a mere press of lips to lips but it is perfect and sweet- nothing like what she imagined because her mind could never fathom something so ideal, the softness of his mouth on hers is enough to make her toes curl and when he wraps his arms around her waist, one hand tight on her back as he eliminates any space between them dragging her impossibly close, she sighs unable to contain her delight as a smile works its way across her lips. He chuckles into the soft press of their first kiss and she can’t help the answering giggle that she lets out, to anyone else they would look deranged but she doesn’t care, this was real. 

He breaks away only to pepper kisses all over her face- first her forehead then her cheeks, her nose and even her chin, all left warm in the wake-  and she blushes under his passionate and diligent attention before grabbing his face and kissing him harder on those plush red lips, hands tight on his hair as she tastes him for the first time. He’s intoxicating and she knows she can never go back to being just friends, not when his flavor is thick on her tongue and she knows what his moans taste like.

Not when his hands are bruising tight on her waist and his scent is coiling around her like a blanket that she never wants to be without. 

She was allowed to have this and she would relish every minute. 

He sits awkwardly on the couch with the woman he has only ever seen a handful of times, when his father had called him and asked for a favor he had never expected this. He had been completely flabbergasted to see the woman on his doorstep but stepped back to give her entrance, nonetheless. 

He knew that his father meant well, was hoping that the two would be able to reconcile like they had but he was forgetting how much they fought before getting to where they were now. It had been an arduous path to restoring their broken relationship and he feared that Sujin and her mother had differences that might be irreconcilable . 

She looks like Sujin, just more weathered and beaten down by life in her expensive clothes and jewelry none of it doing anything to hide the sadness that wafts off her in ebbs and waves. He tried calling the other girl several times but to no avail as he reached her voicemail over and over again, he knows that there is no way this can end well but he couldn’t kick the woman out either, not to be with that sadistic bastard. 

“I should go. She won’t be happy to see me.” She states matter of fact and he’s not a good enough liar to try to argue with her so he says nothing at all, staring at the floor in silence. 

Then the jiggle of keys reach his ears and they both sit taller, gazing at each other wild eyed as the door pushes open. 

Sujin looks blindingly happy, a wide smile stretched across her face and he contemplates throwing a blanket over the woman’s head to hide her- just so the girl can enjoy a few more seconds of happiness but it’s already too late, Sujin slips off her shoes putting on her slippers and walking over to him, her eyes are still on the ground and then she finally looks up and all the air is sucked out of the room. 

All of the joy and exuberance that had previously been imbedded in her pores dissipates and he sees a look so numb, it feels like he’s seeing the Sujin from months ago cold and shivering in Seojun’s arm, the one that didn’t want to live and saw her life as expendable. 

He wonders if he did the right thing? Would she ever forgive him for this? 

She doesn’t say a word, throwing the keys on the table and sprinting back to her shoes, haphazardly stuffing her feet back into them and shooting him one final look of betrayal that makes his blood turn to ice before she slams the door behind her, the sound so powerful the walls vibrate. 

“She hates me.” 

From that look on her face, her mother wasn’t the only one. 

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

Apartment AU Masterpost:

-Everyone lives in an apartment complex.

-Xisuma as landlord? Or just a really well looked up to person in the complex. Whichever works for you!

-Pranks all the time. Everyone's constantly pranking each other.

-Everyone has 'normal people jobs.' Perhaps Joe is an English teacher? (Cleo's also a teacher. (Irl.) Omg, what if they teach at the same school?) Maybe Bdubs is a professional interior designer? Maybe Cub builds computers? Go nuts, get creative.

-Actually, screw it. Bdubs works at IKEA.

-Everyone meets up every Friday night to go to the pub or go bowling or just do something together.

-They have a discord server because of course they do.

-European Hermits are early-birds, American hermits are night-owls. (This is the only way I can think to portray timezones and waking hours when everyone's living in the same building.)

-They all still love minecraft, don't worry.

-Keralis has so many books his flat is basically a library. He lets people come in and borrow books for a small fee.

-Tinfoilchef is a bit of a shut in but everyone makes an effort to include him.

-Etho would also be a cryptid like Xisuma. Like, we've seen Xisuma's whole body other than his face but the best we know about Etho is that: 1. He exists and 2. From the, like, one single real life photo he's shared, he broke a headset. Also, 3. Allegedly, he's buff. Otherwise; Beef and Etho invite Pause (who lives elsewhere,) over at random intervals to [play ctm maps] and do god knows what. Bdoubs works at IKEA but is the person to make the room displays, y'know.

-Scar sells dice and other tabletop rpg supplies that he designs. His shop is magiccrystals. com

-Cub and Scar made business with the guy who runs the fight club. They get half of the profits and everyone’s always wondering how those two can always afford the most expensive Christmas gifts for everyone.

-Mumbo could be an engineer or work on a STEM field, and he works on some really important and impressive projects and that would explain his polish person, Exept, when it comes to helping another hermit to change a lightbulb or fix a microwave he is an absolute disaster.

-Grian owns a parrot that knows everyones' names and faces and greets them when they come in.

-Scar's apartment has a balcony filled with plants and he has to bring them inside for the winter. (I'm assuming that all 4 seasons happen) Even without the balcony plants, his place is still full of indoor plants including his favorite venus flytrap. There is always a plant knocked over from Jellie's shenanigans. Jellie is supposed to stay in his apartment, however she keeps on getting out somehow, even getting to Xisuma's apartment occasionally.

-There's a grassy patch out back that acts as a backyard, but Stress has effectively taken it over. Perfect for flowers of all colors in the spring and summer, and during the winter you KNOW she’s building an ice castle from which to throw snowball at all her friends.

-Beef and, when he’s visiting, Pause get a lot of questions about Etho (since unlike X who gets one tightlipped visitor in shape of his brother Etho gets two that are willing to be vague) however they charge a fee for people to guess. They’d never actually sell him out but the guesses are always something technical related so there’s not much of a risk, he actually works as a botanist/gardener.

-Iskall is extremely good at ice hockey and, as resident Canadians, Etho and Beef have played with him. However Iskall only knows that he’s played with Beef because both beef and etho refuse to tell him who in the rink was Etho when they played.

-The only person who’s seen Xisuma's face is Keralis.

-Nobody knows what Grian does for a job. Like, when they think they've figured it out what he does, they're thrown through a loop again because he does a lot of odd jobs. Need help with a pet? Grian can help! Rip on your clothes? Don't worry, Grian knows how to fix it! Ect.

-Grian's an assassin. Iskall will make assassin jokes and Grian, without looking up from his coffee will go: "that's not how that works!" And then go back to being quiet. Everyone's like ????

-I love the idea of Grian knowing all these cool facts and when anyone acts he says 'it's because of his job,' and they still can't figure out what he does. He keeps correcting Iskall on assassin facts but they're all just like 'oh Grian sure must love those types of movies, huh.'

-Cleo teaches Joe's kid. (That means she teaches either year 2 or year 3? // 1st grade or 2nd grade?)

-Grian's family is in the mafia but he mostly just vibes. Sure, he works with the mafia, but he keeps his regular life away from work and none of the hermits (besides False because she saved the Mafia boss) know. Imagine boss looking at False and going, 'oh hey, you're already protected.' False is confused and says 'what?' But the Mafia Boss has already left.

-Etho is always in full kakashi cosplay.

-Honorary hermits apartment au: zloy and pixl have a radio show but also act as private investigators. Falsie hires them to investigate how she got the protection of the mafia. On their investigation they start asking Elybeat (that lives on a building right next to the hermits) about weird behaviors that he might have seen. Ely just goes ‘all of what they do is weird. I’ve recorded weird stuff they say and remixed it. They though it was funny and put the remixes as their elevator music.'

-Everyone thinks Etho is an assassin, but really, he's a horticulturist/botanist. He doesn't bother to correct them cause it means he doesn't get pranked, (or, as often.) Maybe someone finds out eventually? I don't know who. Maybe Doc and they keep it hush hush cause they think it's funny or something. || Maybe Bdubs finds out, (because I think he's seen Naruto?? Swear I saw a Twitter post where he recognized a Naruto joke) and he's the only one that recognizes that Etho's dressed like Kakashi and NOT an assassin. (That's lowkey a joke though.)

-Someone warns Grian against parking euro because they think Etho's an assassin and Grian just kinda goes: "alright then." Knowing that there's no way Etho is an assassin, but also realising how the hermits view that profession, he most likely starts feeling kinda bad.

-Beef used to be a car photographer and Mumbo takes photographs as a sideline when he was in college. They would occasionally chat about their past experience in the photography field and sometimes gush about cars.

-Hermit Challenges was actually a truth or dare game among the hermits. Mumbo was basically delirious from lack of sleep to explain his absolute gremlin energy. Mumbo dares Grian to steal front doors before passing out and everyone decided that was the end of that game. No one thought Grian would do the dare. A week later, everyone but Etho and Xisuma were missing their front doors (including Grian.) He stuck them in his bathroom so no one immediately saw the doors.

-As already established, Joe constantly hangs at Keralis's library. Let's say he also has a hobby for writing, and one time he was asking to himself how *insert really specific murder scene* would work in real life. Grian or Doc then overheard him and answers him in a also very specific way, he thanks them with 0 concerns and continues with his writing.

-Etho has been an assassin but it was many years ago, and retired to care for plants. (As you do.) He got hired by The Goatfather but intentionally botched the killings because, 'hey now those two are friends >:(' He and Bdubs still have the endrod game but it involves the whole apartment building and several discord messages going "located" or "flashlight on the move.'

-Stress paints all the hermit's door and puts their names on them. (-🌿)

-The organisization Grian works for is called "The Watchers!" They text him in riddles of what his missions are. This is so that if anyone peaks at his phone, they don't understand immediately!

-What if in YHS happen because of grian family and Sam is from an other family who does not support the grain family. So grian will not bring up high school and school and when joe and Cleo talk about there student grian sometimes cringes remember what happened in high school. (-🌿)

-Grian and Mumbo's hobbits holes were two cupboards they found on their respective apartments and decided to make a room out of them and named them their hobbit holes after they found out they both had them (-🐿️)

-What if it's a really old apartment and the 'hobbit holes' actually connect to each others apartment. (-🐺)

-Mumbo has these periods when he overworks like crazy and when they're over - he sleeps for like 24-36 hours straight. Everybody knows about this and help him if he falls asleep in random plaxes around the apartment. Mumbo once fell asleep right before his door and Grian tried to help him get inside while mumbling. Guess which remix were aded to the elevator music next week.

-Whenever anyone is annoyed or upset, grian sometimes pops his head up from his book and goes "who do I need to kill?" No one takes him seriously though he *would* kill for any of his friends.

-People who have left the server work nearby but have moved to new apartments. (For example, Welsknight works at a nearby food truck) (-☘️)

-With the Grian being a spy you get several oints where he thinks he's been found out but no one puts the and two together. They're all like: "Grian just likes action movies I guess."

-Scar's "wizard robe" is a bathrobe he owns. One day he forgets to change and just walks out in a bathrobe and no pants.

-Since Cleo teaches Joe's kid, maybe that extends to all the hermits' kids? Like the ones that have them, like not at the same time but at some point you know?

-I don't think I saw any regarding headgames, but I could've missed it. Anyways, what if Cleo wanted to make a big Scrapbook in her free time of all her friends, so she asks everybody to try and get pictures. So the PVP heads are candid photos, and the tradeable one are like selfies or group pictures. The other heads could just be a requirement for the picture like have a sheep in the picture. And maybe she gives the winners dinner payed by her or something.

-On the head cannon that hermits that aren’t on the server work nearby, Biffa is the actual mayor.

-Are mobs (and half mobs by extension) still a thing in apartment au? Cause if not I propose that Jevin just has cloob blue dyed hair and a bunch of blue tattoos.

-XB bakes a lot and always shares the food he makes with the others. They adore his cookies. Scar really wants to make some cookies in the shapes of disney characters with him, but he's too shy to ask. (-nameless anon)

-Perhaps Mumbo and Iskall are also protected by the mafia because of grian (perhaps scar is too) They and False have a 'we are protected and have no idea why' group (-Frost Anon)

-Imagine the hermits want to throw a nice party but X and Etho were kinda like “yeah no i’ll pass” so they make it a masquerade so that they can come- and then the whole night no one knows who anyone really is, but still has a really good time.

-Grian wanted a pet parrot, but felt like he would be terrible at taking care of one so he has toy parrots instead, those that have pre made phrases and such, and he is proud of his toy parrot pets. (-🐿️)

-Xisuma hosts a podcast! That's where all of his Xisuma speaks content ends up coming from. (-🇵🇭)

-Etho has a secret food blog called "Cooking With Etho" (based on the actual cooking with Etho segment in usually his modded stuff.) He also knows that there's hermits that either: have no idea how to cook properly or can't cook real meals due to their work. To help with this, sometimes he leaves finished meals or recipes with them (outside their doors or somehow in their fridge) and no one knows who does it prompting the theory of a self care ghost haunting the building.

(All of those in red were from Anons!)

-Joe works as a LAMP Developer.

-False has an assortment of swords, knives, etc. She even had a bow! She also has a dummy to practice fighting on.

(-@unpredictable-pancake.)

-Stress is a wedding designer. (-@the-angry-numel.)

-Iskall also works at IKEA with Bdubs. (-@mandatedempathy.)

-There's a local club that's basically fight club a few people are in. False, Iskall and a couple others are in.

-Hypno is kind of a bit of a loner. Everyone on the floor considers him a friend but he doesn't really have a best friend. He just does his own thing and people usually let him do that. He's fine with it.

-XB and Joe spend a lot of time at Keralis' library house just reading the books. Keralis usually charges every except those two because 1. They're there so often and 2. They're basically his room mates at this point. (-@tomcatacaphe.)

-Ren works at a bar as a bartender or musician. (-@friendlyneighbourhoodpieceoftrash.)

-Building on the last thing with Ren as a musician or working at a bar, he works at a bar as a server but does live music on weekends. It's the bar/pub/restaurant that the hermits sometimes hang out at together.

-I can see Grian working at a pet shop but also on the side of the mafia because of YHS. Or at least he used to be involved with the mafia.

-Beef once had to cart Etho off to the hospital for a chemical burn and explain to the other tenants that the explosion heard suspiciously close by wasn’t mafia activity. Etho is just an idiot with a hobby of making homemade fireworks.

-(-@limelocked.)

-False is the chief of police for the town they live in. Iskall is a hired assassin who normally gets employed by the mysterious figure GOATfather. Doc is the GOATfather, head of the mafia. Falsie is trying to hunt down these two as well as any others associated with them. The nHo is part of the mafia. Falsie has no idea any of them are in the mafia and they refuse to kill her because she has become such a close friend to them.

-Maybe Grian is a spy instead of an assassin? The group the Watchers is a government policing organization bent on trying to crack down on mob activity in the area.

(-@creator0fchaos.)

-The elevator music is hermitgang and remixes. -(@lookitsspacekween.)

-Zedaph is a game show host. Tango makes cartoons. (-@aphion-and-on.)

-Come on, let Iskall play ice hockey! Maybe not professionally if it doesn't work for the AU but he's v good at least. (-@automnalsaffron.)

-Grian maybe works at an animal shelter or an animal rehabilitation center. So everyone who has a pet usually comes to him for help if their pet is sick or injured. (-@vahco.)

-Grian has a safe full of guns, all the Hermits know about it but think they're fake. (-@xxpzmistxx)

-X never comes out of his room so no one’s seen his face. The only way he communicates is via text, Discord, and an intercom right by his door. He almost always gets groceries whenever the hermits are busy and therefore have no time to go out- but the hermits know he’s a real person because sometimes they hear guitar solos coming from his room.

-Hypno is a voice actor!

-Joe and Cleo often go home at the same time, and all the way it's almost always Cleo complaining about her students being bratty and the likes (Bonus points if Joe carpools with Cleo, who owns a car.)

-False unknowingly helps the boss of the mafia after seeing him wounded on a street one day, earning her their protection.

-As a callback to Season 6, Stress became a cat lady for a bit while False became a dog lady. As an added bonus: Cleo became nuts when Cub decided to gift her with spiders for her birthday or some other event.

-Mumbo still sidelines as a cameraman/film director for short documentaries and comedy sketches where he often invites Zed and his buddy Jack to act maybe?

-The first time X was proven to be an actual person was when the girls temporarily kicked the boys out to have the apartment all to themselves for a girls’ night which prompted the boys to have their own boys’ night. X was wearing his grey helmet that night so his face was still obscured tho, and from that day forward they always had a weekly girls’ night and boys’ night alternating on which group gets to have the apartment to themselves.

-False may seem like she can take a shot or two, but in reality she’s very lightweight and easily drunk, and is always the first one wasted. She becomes a flirty drunk who flirts with everyone and everything when she’s tipsy, an angry drunk the more she drinks and eventually a sad drunk before passing out. Cleo and Stress, her drinking buddies, always find amusement in this.

-As a callback to Xb living a thousand blocks away from society in s7, maybe he lives at the highest floor where not many (if not no one) occupies?

(-@heyitsroby.)

-Civil War started because they used to get groceries delivered to their doors and Grian started stealing them when they were left in the doorstep. Everyone stole each others groceries until one day they went into teamss of one side vs the other side of the corridor to the other until Grian stole so many groceries Dic was like 'Dammit!' He started going to the store to get groceries instead of getting them delivered to his door after that. (-@sayeshaa1108.)

-Regarding apartment au: Zedaph is similar to miu iruma from danganronpa: making the weirdest inventions and coaxing the other hermits into doing weird things for science. (-@oh-hecc-im-stupid.)

-Idk if Doc has a profession yet in the apartment au, but it just struck me- what if he owned a private casino?? Cause of s7? Just a thought! (-@853dragons.)

-Cleo really enjoys doing miniature diorama scenes. Like the tiny dudes from "Night at The Museum". She's like crazy good at it, and Joe will sometimes base his poems and stories off of her dioramas. Also maybe Joe has published a book of poems and short stories? (-@lynxes15.)

-Doc works as a social engineer and part time mafia boss. He rarely shows up for game nights. However, when he does, nobody else stands a chance.

-Tango, Impulse and Zedaph go over to each other's rooms so often they practically live together in an apartment room 3X bigger than everyone else.

(-@trashedeggnog.)

LINK TO NEXT POST: https://hermitcraftheadcanons.tumblr.com/post/617640752709861376/apartmentau-masterpost-2-link-to-previous-the

Posts with TW:

Guns, Gangs, Getting Shot. Don't read if you can't handle this topics.

-Everyone finds out Grian is an assassin/mafia boss because someone from a different gang (*cough cough* sam gladiator *cough cough*) found out where he lives and tried to murder him. Queue epic gun fight scene. If you want some angst, Grian gets shot a couple of times in the fight but didn’t realize it because of the adrenaline and passes out. (-Anon.)

-Imagine someone like, finding Grian's guns and weapons and just being :0 and Grian is a little nervous. But then the other hermit just think the guns are cool (it's probably either etho or doc) and they're just gushing over how cool the guns are. Grian is relieved. (-Anon.)

-iJevin owns at least one gun. He's not in the mafia or a cop or anything, it's just cool and legal so he as one. He's the constant counter for the other gun owning hermits who have them for more mafia related purposes (context: jevin owns at least one gun irl) (-Anon.)

[ish-scribbles]

Wearing his Jersey

At the Nekoma Training Camp, You and your team from Karasuno High get an unexpected invite to a Halloween Costume Party at Nekoma High and since you didn't have a costume, You wore his jersey.

Pairing: Nishinoya Yuu x Reader

Word Count: 2.2k

Warning: Whole lotta flufff~ also this is my first fic :)

"Y/N!" A familiar libero yells to you while frantically waving his hand as he enters the gym with Tanaka "Do you need help carrying that?" He says while jogging to you from the other side of the gym.

"No no, it's alright Noya, me and Yachi can carry it together it once she arrives, I don't want to bother you, you can start with your warm ups tho-" you reply as you try to push the heavy trolley full of volleyball equipment yourself again to which I may add you fail miserably

"Are you kidding me? Nothing makes me happier than helping one of our talented team managers" he replies smoothly while flashing a bright smile at you.

You were one of the two first years Kiyoko scouted to be Team Managers for the Karasuno Boys Volleyball Team after she graduates. Amongst you and Yachi, you were the more social one and comparitively easy to talk to. In in all due time you both mixed well and got to know a lot of things about the team, but the thing you weren't aware of yet was that a certain libero had his eyes set on you for a long time, even before you joined Karasuno.

You and Nishinoya went to the same Middle School and lived around the same neighborhood. He liked you ever since he was in middle school but he could never muster the courage to say 'hi' let alone start a conversation with you which was very ironic to the type of person he was. Since, you never seemed to have anything in common with him, he never tried to start anything in the fear of direct rejection. But when he found out that you were one of the first years at Karasuno High AND are going to be one of the new team managers for his team, he was ECSTATIC to say the least. He would finally get to talk to you, spend time with you, get to know you, maybe even be good friends?! But on the day when Kiyoko brought you and Yachi to introduce yourselves to the team, Noya was beyond shocked even before he got to introduced himself.

"Wait! You're Nishinoya, the libero who was in Chidoriyama Junior High aren't you? I always saw you in our school matches, heck I often came to your matches to cheer for you guys,,, tho it's okay if you don't know me" you said with a nervous laugh.

"Of course I know you, You're Y/N, though I have to admit I never knew you that well or know the fact that you came to watch our matches" he smiles while he scratching his head shyly

"Oh I wouldn't miss your matches for the world unless I had some test or something, Our team was so impressive and now that I think of it your Rolling Thunder move was AMAZING!" You said enthusiastically the poor boi got so flustered~~

It wasn't that you didn't want Noya to be more than friends, You even had a crush on him in middle school but were too shy to do anything about it and then he graduated middle school a year before and you never got the chance again. But the truth was you never thought of yourself to be someone who people could like in such a way you were somewhat insecure about yourself but after joining Karasuno you got to meet him again and the of two slowly became close friends who enjoyed each other's company.

It was at this moment when Nishinoya completely fell for you. After that day, Noya tried to spend anytime he could with you; walking you to school and back since you lived nearby, sitting with you during the lunch time or inviting you to sit with him and Tanaka along with occasional surprises like candies or other snacks. He even helped you with your manager duties. Anything you wanted, he was just one call away. He tried to make it VERY obvious that he liked you VERY much, but you never considered it to be more than a him being friendly,,, atleast that's what you convinced yourself to since you considered him way out of your league and were low-key a little self conscious too.

You not understanding his advances in that way sometimes got him thinking if he even had a chance with you or was it just a loss cause, a one sided crush? But he never gave up on you, thats just the kind of guy he was.

-x-x-x-

It wasn't very long after you joined the team, when you and Yachi were asked to go to Tokyo with the rest of the team for the Nekoma Training Camp and since you wanted to learn everything about being a team manager before Kiyoko graduated, you said yes.

After reaching the Training Camp, a lot of guys from different schools tried to hit on you, Yachi and Kiyoko,,, but Tanaka, Nishinoya and Yamamoto from Nekoma made it their mission to not let guys approach and hit on you by anyone but them.

At the camp, practice started early in the morning and ended late in the evening. While the boys practiced volleyball, you and Yachi learned a lot of new things from Kiyoko and the other managers there. Days went by and it was the second last day of the camp already. You and the team received an unexpected invite to a costume party.

"A costume party?" You asked to which Takeda Sensei answered and addressed to the whole team as well "Yes, apparently it's a tradition like prom at Nekoma High and they have a Halloween Costume Party every year and this year all the teams at the training camp are invited. The party will have students from different schools so it is a good opportunity to make connections...I expect you guys to attend it. The party will start tomorrow at 12 in the afternoon and will end at 6 in the evening. Since the party has a compulsory rule of wearing a costume, all of are free for now to go and find costumes to rent, but I expect everyone to return before 9 or no dinner!!" to which the whole team replied "Yes, sensei!"

-x-x-x-

The next day at the party, Asahi Suga and Daichi being the dorks they are chose to show up as the three musketeers. Kageyama and Hinata lost a bet to Tsukishima so they went as a King and a Tangerine, and the rest of the team showed up with good costumes too. Nishinoya dressed up as a Ninja who looked straight out of anime, yes he looked that good and Tanaka dressed up as a samurai.

"Man~ I really wanted to be a sumo-wrestler instead of a samurai but Daichi said it showed too much skin, He's probably jealous of my good looks" Tanaka pouted while complaining and fidgeting with his costume

"Ew no, nobody wants to see you like that, Tanaka! By the way have you seen Y/N and the others, Aren't they here yet?" Nishinoya asked as he glanced around

"Oh somebody in a rush to see Y/N?" Tanaka cheerily asked with all sorts of wiggly eyebrows "CUT IT OUT ALREADY, What if she's around and she hears you?!" Nishinoya says frantically

"Relax~~ she hasn't arrived yet, otherwise all of the guys would've been drooling over her and rest of our gorgeous team managers"

"I suppose you're right"

After a lot of brainstorming Kiyoko decided she's not wearing anything special, so she wore an oversized hoodie and carried a xbox remote control which she borrowed from Kenma and that gave her a gamer girl look, while you and Yachi remained clueless.

But where were you, Yachi and Kiyoko? Ah yes, you guys still didn't have a costume yet,,,so while the others had already started partying, you guys were still in your shared room deciding on your outfits, since all of the costumes at the store were either too revealing or not in your size, so that was a lost cause.

"Kiyoko-san, its not fair~ you look so pretty even in the simplest of clothes" you sighed

"That's not true, though...haven't you guys decided on a costume yet?" Kiyoko asked

"Noo" you sighed while sitting on the floor with your chin on your knees almost ready to give up on the party.

"Well..umm...I had an idea but it could be a little ridiculous. But like...what if we wore our school volleyball jersey? It can be a way to show our school spirits and we would finally have a costume to wear?" Yachi proposed.

"That seems like a great idea" Kiyoko answered with a slight smile.

"Great, I'll call Hinata and ask if I can borrow his jersey" Yachi said while she scrolling to find his number on her phone.

"I guess I could ask Nishinoya, we're about the same height and we're good friends too so it shouldn't be a problem, I suppose" You say to yourself to which Kiyoko nods in approval and continued getting ready, and then you dial up Noya's number.

When Noya first got your call he got into frenzy thinking why were you calling him since you didn't call each other that often, but he picked up the phone anyways

"Y-Y/N?"

"Hey, Noya? haha funny story and I'll explain it later, but I'm desperate right now so would it be too much trouble if i can I borrow your jer-" before you finished your sentence loud music started blasting over the party and your voice wasn't audible anymore.

"Y/N, Y/N? Hello? Y/N I can't hear you anymore...but if there's something that you want to borrow, you can take it"

When you came back to your room, you and Yachi started changing,,,After wearing Nishinoya's jersey you noticed that his shorts were skin tight while his jersey t-shirt was baggy which made you think how muscular he actually is.

After your call ended, you and Yachi went over to the room where the boys were sleeping over at and while Yachi searched for Hinata's uniform, you searched for Noya's. When you finally found his jersey, an unexpected scent of sweat mixed with sports deo hit your senses, which was nice to smell low-key addicting? and you thought to yourself 'Does he always smells this nice?' and before you went any further, your train of thought was interrupted by Yachi saying "Let's go and get changed" with a slight smile on her face.

After the three of you got ready, you finally started off to the hall where the party was being held. When the three of you showed up at the entry gate, you felt everyone's head turning towards you three. Tanaka and Nishinoya saw the slight commotion and decided to go over to have a look by themselves at what's going on as well.

After reaching the entry, Nishinoya stopped in his tracks when he found a familiar figure looking back at him wearing his orange jersey. YOU WERE FINALLY HERE. IN HIS JERSEY. WEARING HIS NUMBER. WEARING HIS NAME POOR BOY GOT SO SHOCKED HE ALMOST PASSED OUT LIKE AJSKDHDNK

After you finally spotted Nishinoya in the crowd you excused yourself from Kiyoko and Yachi as you wanted to apologize for not taking permission to wear his jersey properly over the phone, so you started walking towards him. While you walking towards him you felt all the guys around eyeing at you and even Nishinoya looked somewhat dumbfounded. While you were trying to make your way towards him, he was so entranced by you that every memory that he had with you flashed before his eyes. The time you tried to hit spikes to help him practice receives, the times you sat with him at lunch laughing at his stupidest jokes, you massaging his shoulders to relax the muscle he pulled during a match, the worry he saw in your eyes when you saw his bruised arms from restless practices, the way you get all excited when he pulls a 'rolling thunder' move while other laughed at him for the name he gave to the move.

The moment you reached him, Tanaka left you two alone saying something like "I gotta show Kiyoko my awesome costume~" while Nishinoya still silently looked at you with his mouth slightly agap and spoke nothing until you started talking

"I'm so sorry, I had no costume to wear and Yachi and I decided to show some school spirit by wearing the jerseys, You don't mind, do you? I PROMISE I'LL WASH IT BEFORE I GIVE IT BACK. Its just that costumes were compulsory for entering the party and I didn't knew whether I'll have another chance to an event like this so I'm sorry if bothers you, I'll go back and change right now if you want" You frantically spoke while clasping your hands together to apologize.

Nishinoya couldn't say anything else than "Don't worry about it" his eyes not leaving your body for a second, he was too busy admiring his jersey on you, he was practically MESMERIZED. The way his jersey hugged every part and every curve of your body just perfectly, HE WANTED YOU TO WEAR HIS JERSEY FOREVER! The way his shorts were tight but his t-shirt was baggy, it made him feel slightly bigger than you.

"Do I look that bad tho? I feel like everyone's staring at me" You ask with a slight nervous laugh as you got a little nervous thinking whether everyone is looking at you because you looker weird but you instead got the reaction

"Are you kidding?! That's because you look the like the most beautiful person in the whole world!!" He says without a warning and after realizing what he just said and he himself didn't knew why did he just say it to your face

This catches you off guard as well and your cheek turns to a bright pink tone as well.

But he looks back at you and gathers the last of his remaining courage and puts his hand out to ask "Would you like to dance with me? This is a party after all you know" he says with a big smile shooting his last shot but in the back of his head he expected a straight out rejection because he thought 'Why would girl like her ever dance with a guy like me, stupid stupid stupid' but to his surprise you said "Yes" and took his hand while returning a small and still flustered smile. HE WAS ON CLOUD 9.

After the party ended, he asked you out and you say yes. After that day you were forced to wear his spare jersey to each of Karasuno's game and to this day, you in his jersey at that party is his phone wallpaper and he has no intention of changing it.

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 22

Updated as of (3-31-2021) (previous) (all chapters)

All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment.

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22. HIDE AND SEEK

“What was it?” I’d lost control of my voice — it was flat, uncaring.

Jasper stared at me. I kept my expression vacant and waited. Her eyes flickered between Alice’s face and mine, feeling the chaos. I knew what Alice had seen.

A peaceful atmosphere settled around me. I didn’t fight it. I used it to keep my emotions under control.

Alice recovered, too. Her face snapped back to its normal expression.

“Nothing,” she said, her voice amazingly calm and convincing. “Just the same room as before.” She looked at me, focusing for the first time. “Did you want breakfast?”

“I’ll eat at the airport.” I was calm, too. Almost like I was borrowing Jasper’s extra sense, I could feel Alice’s well-concealed desperation to get me out of the room, so that she could be alone with her. So she could tell her that they were doing something wrong, that they were going to fail.

Alice was still focused on me.

“Is your mother all right?”

I had to swallow back a throatful of bile. I could only follow the script I’d planned earlier.

“My mom was worried,” I said in a monotone voice. “She wanted to come home. It’s okay. I convinced her to stay in Florida for now.”

“That’s good.”

“Yes,” I agreed robotically.

I turned and walked slowly to the bedroom, feeling their eyes following the whole way. I shut the door behind me, and then I did what I could. I showered and got dressed in clothes that fit me. I dug through the duffel bag until I found my sock full of money—I emptied it into my pocket.

I stood there for a minute, staring at nothing, trying to think of things I was allowed to think about. I came up with one idea.

I knelt by the little bedside table and opened the top drawer. Underneath the complimentary copy of the Bible, there was a stash of stationery and a pen. I took a sheet of paper and an envelope out of the drawer.

“Edythe,” My hand was shaking.

I love you.

Sorry—again. So sorry.

She has my mom, and I have to try. I know it may not work. I am so very, very sorry.

Don’t be mad at Alice and Jasper. If I get away from them it will be a miracle. Tell them thank you for me. Alice especially.

And please, please don’t come after her. That’s what she wants. I can’t stand it if anyone else has to be hurt because of me, especially you. Please, this is the only thing I can ask you now. For me.

I’m not sorry that I met you. I’ll never be sorry that I love you.

Forgive me.

Bella.

But before I could put any of those words on the page, I felt a scream bubble up in my throat. All the emotions I’d been trying to repress- I tried to smother it with my hands but in the quiet hotel room it was like a gunshot. Alice was instantly by my side. 

“Bella, what’s wrong?” Her eyes were wild, darting around the room, like she was trying to find both the danger present in this moment as well as the potential dangers in the future. Jasper stood at the door, hesitating.

And then it all came out. The threats, the fact that I never even got to talk to my mom at all, Jamie threatening to kill her if I didn’t come alone- Jasper was on my other side now, a steady presence. I tried to focus on her hand on my shoulder, tried to tie my attention to my body and not my anxieties- but it was just too much.

The room started to darken- I couldn’t get enough breath- my heart was beating so hard I was surprised it hadn’t given out yet- I just couldn’t breathe-

A wave of darkness dragged me under, and I knew no more.

I resurfaced in fits and starts, my whole body aching. It felt like I’d been run over by a truck. No, a train. It hurt to breathe, but I was breathing. So that was a start. I felt a cool hand in mine, a soft stream of steady comfort flowing into my chest. Jasper.

“How-” I croaked, then started coughing. A strong arm was around my shoulders, holding me up, and someone held a bottle of water to my lips. I drank, gratefully, then finally opened my eyes. We were in a car.

I tried again. “How long was I out?” This time at least I made it through the whole sentence.

“Only an hour. We’re halfway to your mother’s house.” Alice replied, looking distracted.

“But-”

“We will get out ten blocks away. Just in case someone’s watching the house.” Jasper says, squeezing my hand.

“The others will be arriving soon, as soon as they can.” I didn’t know if she was keeping it vague for my sake or because she wasn’t sure herself.

Jasper looked over at Alice when she didn’t continue, then back at me. “We have a plan. We just need to make sure Jamie suspects as little as possible. I won’t sugar coat this Bella. You might get hurt. But neither you or your mom will be in serious danger. Here.”

She handed me one of the slim silver phones. “Before you enter the house, call Alice. She’s on speed dial one. She will add Carine to the call, and you can tuck the phone into the inside pocket of this jacket.”

She patted the front of an unfamiliar jacket I was now wearing. I nodded numbly. “That way we can hear everything that’s happening, and we know when to make our move. We will be right behind you Bella, I swear. We won’t let you or your mother get hurt. Do you believe me?”

“I- I believe you.” It came out shaky and not very confident, but it seemed to be enough.

“The Black pack and Esme are keeping an eye on Charlie. Julie insisted on coming with Edythe and the others on the flight.”

“Julie’s coming?” I felt a strange kind of lightness in my chest, like the aftershock of me finding out I would see Edythe soon. I missed Julie. I hadn’t gotten to see her in too long.

“Yes.” There was an unfamiliar undertone to Jasper’s voice, almost- amusement? No, pride? I didn’t know.

“They’ve landed.” Alice said, her eyes still focused on something neither one of us could see. “They’ll be ten minutes behind us. They’re going directly to the studio.”

“Jasper, you can let go now.” She turned to me with a question in her eyes. I just took a deep breath and nodded. She let go of my hand and slowly, the distant buzz of panic started to turn into a dull roar.

We turned onto a familiar street. One of them must’ve been keeping an eye on the road because Alice takes out her phone and Jasper looks down at mine. I’m sure holding down one number isn’t hard, but my hands are shaking so much I barely trust myself to do even that.

There’s a small crunch and then Jasper tucks the phone into the hidden pocket of the jacket. When I look up at her, confused, she gives me a small, slightly feral smile.

“Broke the end call button. So you can’t accidentally hang up on us.”

I feel my lips tug into what is no doubt a very bad imitation of her smile. She pats my head, but it doesn’t feel condescending. It feels comforting. I guess this is her way of saying she cares.

And then, too soon, they both stepped out of the car. Alice leaned forward to press a kiss to my forehead. I tried not to cry.

“You are strong Bella. And remember, we are right behind you.” Something in her eyes blazed, and I felt it light a spark deep inside of me. I could do this. I had to do this. Then the doors closed and I was alone again.

“Hey, what was the number?”

The cabbie’s question startled me so hard I flinched. The fear I’d tamped down for a few minutes took control again.

“Fifty-eight twenty-one.” My voice sounded strangled. The cabbie looked at me like she was nervous.

“Here we are, then.” She was anxious to get me out of her car, probably hoping I wouldn’t ask for change.

“Thank you,” I whispered. There was no need to be afraid, I reminded myself. I knew the house was empty. I had to hurry; my mom was waiting for me, terrified, maybe hurt already, in pain, depending on me.

I ran to the door, reaching up automatically to grab the key under the eave. It was dark inside, empty, normal. The smell was so familiar, it almost incapacitated me. It felt like my mother must be close, just in the other room, but I knew that wasn’t true.

I ran to the phone, turning on the kitchen light on my way. There, on the whiteboard, was a ten-digit number written in a small, neat hand. My fingers stumbled over the keypad, making mistakes. I had to hang up and start again. I concentrated on just the buttons this time, carefully pressing each one in turn. I was successful. I held the phone to my ear with a shaking hand. It rang only once.

“Hello, Bella,” that easy voice answered. “That was very quick. I’m impressed.”

“Is my mom okay?”

“She’s perfectly fine. Don’t worry, Bella, I have no quarrel with her. Unless you didn’t come alone, of course.” Light, amused.

“I’m alone.” I wasn’t lying. There was nobody else in the house.

“Very good. Now, do you know the ballet studio just around the corner from your home?”

“Yeah. I know how to get there.”

“Well, then, I’ll see you very soon.”

I hung up.

I ran from the room, through the door, out into the morning heat.

From the corner of my eye, I could almost see my mother standing in the shade of the big eucalyptus tree where I’d played as a kid. Or kneeling by the little plot of dirt around the mailbox, the cemetery of all the flowers she’d tried to grow. The memories were better than any reality I would see today. But I raced away from them.

I felt so slow, like I was running through wet sand—I couldn’t seem to get enough purchase from the concrete. I tripped over my feet several times, once falling, catching myself with my hands, scraping them on the sidewalk, and then lurching up to plunge forward again. At last I made it to the corner. Just another street now; I ran, sweat pouring down my face, gasping. The sun was hot on my skin, too bright as it bounced off the white concrete and blinded me.

When I rounded the last corner, onto Cactus, I could see the studio, looking just as I remembered it. The parking lot in front was empty, the vertical blinds in all the windows drawn. I couldn’t run anymore—I couldn’t breathe; fear had gotten the best of me. I thought of my mother to keep my feet moving, one in front of the other.

As I got closer, I could see the sign taped inside the door. It was handwritten on bright pink paper; it said the dance studio was closed for spring break. I touched the handle, tugged on it cautiously. It was unlocked. I fought to catch my breath, and opened the door.

The lobby was dark and empty, cool, the air conditioner thrumming. The plastic molded chairs were stacked along the walls, and the carpet was damp. The west dance floor was dark, I could see through the open viewing window. The east dance floor, the bigger room, the one from Alice’s vision, was lit. But the blinds were closed on the window.

Terror seized me so strongly that I was literally trapped by it. I couldn’t make my feet move forward.

And then my mom’s voice called for me.

“Bella? Bella?” That same tone of hysterical panic. I sprinted to the door, to the sound of her voice.

“Bella, you scared me! Don’t you ever do that to me again!” Her voice continued as I ran into the long, high-ceilinged room.

I stared around me, trying to find where her voice was coming from. I heard her laugh, and I spun toward the sound.

There she was, on the TV screen, mussing my hair in relief. It was Thanksgiving, and I was twelve. We’d gone to see my grandmother in California, the last year before she died. We went to the beach one day, and I’d leaned too far over the edge of the pier. Mom had seen my feet flailing, trying to reclaim my balance. “Bella? Bella?” she’d cried out in panic.

And then the TV screen was blue.

I turned slowly. The tracker was standing very still by the back exit, so still I hadn’t noticed her at first. In her hand was a remote control. We stared at each other for a long moment, and then she smiled.

She walked toward me, got just a few feet away, and then passed me to put the remote down next to the VCR. I pivoted carefully to watch her.

“Sorry about that, Bella, but isn’t it better that your mother didn’t really have to be involved in all this?” Her voice was kind.

And suddenly it hit me. My mom was safe. She was still in Florida. She’d never gotten my message. She’d never been terrified by the dark red eyes staring at me now. She wasn’t in pain. She was safe.

“Yes,” I answered, my voice breaking with relief.

“You don’t sound angry that I tricked you.”

“I’m not.” My sudden high made me brave. What did it matter now? It would be over soon. Charlie and Mom would never be hurt, would never have to be afraid. I felt almost dizzy from the relief. Some analytical part of my mind warned me that I was close to snapping from the stress, but then, losing my mind sounded like a decent option right now.

“How odd. You really mean it.” Her dark eyes looked me up and down. The irises were nearly black, just a hint of ruby around the edges. Thirsty. “I will give your strange coven this much, you humans can be quite interesting. I guess I can see the draw of observing you more closely. It’s amazing—some of you seem to have no sense of your own self-interest at all.”

"What do you want from me?" My voice was calm, indifferent. Dangerously so.

I attempted to get my heart rate up again by thinking of all the ways they could kill me. Nothing worked, not after the relief of discovering my mother's safety. At least Jamie hadn't noticed yet.

Jamie raised an eyebrow. "From you? Nothing."

I was confused for a moment, then it hit me. My eyes widened.

"No," I hissed. "You're not touching her."

"Why are you so worried, sweet bird?" Jamie crooned. "I heard that Edythe Cullen could read minds -- she can protect herself just fine. But you..." She reached out with a finger to trace my cheeks. Instantly I jerked away.

"I've always wanted to try my luck against a mind reader," she continued. "Don't we all?"

I became aware of four pairs of glistening teeth, their fangs protruding horribly out of their mouths.

"And not just a mind reader --" she counted on her hand, "-- a seer and a emotion-manipulator as well. You saw what they can do at that meeting, no?"

"Stop it," I said.

"It would be a marvelous hunt," she sighed. "Six of us against seven weak, pitiful, pacifists. The Volturi had limits on killing humans, but not so for our own kind." Her red eyes focused on mine. "I wonder how long those pretty ambers of theirs keep their color. A day? Two weeks, three after I plucked them out?"

"Stop." I couldn’t even stop to wonder where the other vampires had come from. I just stared at her, hoping against all hope that the phone was still on, that they could hear, that they were coming, that Alice had seen. That they would be ready for five vampires instead of one.

"And the first step had already been done for us, too. Bait has dropped itself into our very laps." Rigidly, I sat as she circled about me.

"Now it's time to set the trap."

My blood went cold. Murmurs echoed through the room, agreeing with her. So that's why they hadn't killed me yet, when they could have done so easily before.

I felt her touch like spiders in my hair. She paused in front of me and reached down, gripping both of the chair handles to peer straight into my face.

"So, Bella, do you have any ideas you'd like to volunteer?"

I kept my mouth shut, unmoving.

"You know perfectly what we could do." All eyes turned to a man in the corner. Despite an attractive countenance, he had hungry eyes and flexing, hungrier hands. "We could take her and leave her body for them to find."

Jamie's smile was cold. "Take her?"

I shuddered.

He didn't get the hint. "You know, we -- "

"The next time you say something like that again," Jamie snarled, "I'll nail your fucking body to the sea floor and let the fish take you. Are we clear?"

The man's mouth was open and he closed it. Jamie turned sharply away from him, hissing.

"You know, Bella," she said, ignoring the previous conversation. "I have an idea."

I stared at her, waiting.

"It always struck me strange how your lover is so willing to let you age away and die right before her eyes when the solution was right there. Your poor, cowardly beloved Edythe."

"Would you like to become a vampire, Bella?"

Something clattered outside. Jamie whipped her head around. Instantly all the vampires crouched, stances ready to kill.

"They're here," cried Jamie, her eyes glinting with delighted ferocity. She grabbed a fistful of my hair and yanked it like a leash. I gasped in pain.

"You'll be staying with me. Edythe is mine to kill."

The vampires blurred as they moved. One reached for the handle and twisted it, breaking the lock with ease. They opened it.

In stepped a vampire I hadn’t seen before. She must’ve been keeping watch outside. Dark liquid was seeping through a raw wound on her neck, like something had tore a chunk out of it. She gasped, his eyes wide with terror.

"Wolves," she screamed. "Wol--!"

Something large and furry closed its maw about his head with a sickening crunch and wrenched him from the door. Windows shattered as bodies collided with it.

I closed my eyes.

"No." I heard Jamie. "It can't be!"

I reached under my shirt. My hands found the pocket knife nestled in my sports bra. Quickly snapping out the blade, I slashed Jamie's hand. She yelped and let go. Snarling, she made a grab for me. I dodged and fell to the floor.

Something leaped between us, and I heard her crash into the wall.

"Bella?!" A tinny voice yelled from inside my jacket. I slowly crawled to the corner of the room, ignoring the chaos happening around me, and hoisted myself against the wall, struggling to get the phone out of the secret pocket.

"Bella!"

"I'm fine, I'm okay," I said quickly, but my voice still shook. “Is everyone okay?"

I heard a sigh of relief on the other side.

"Yep, never better," Quil replied. Quil. I was surprised I recognized her voice in all the chaos.

I took a sharp breath and wrapped my arms around myself, relief tenth-fold.

“By the way, did you know that one of the blood-suckers’ got electricity powers? They shut down your Mom's whole city; that's why we couldn't contact her using email or phone. Giant disaster."

"Really?"

I was beginning to notice a crackling sound. Puzzled, I held the phone out before me. It was throwing sparks. I hurriedly dropped it on the ground. Nearby, the light bulb shattered, throwing the room into darkness. A bright flash hissed through the air. I lifted my eyes. One of the vampires had lightning zapping from her fingertips, throwing sparks wildly at anything that moved.

Time to leave.

I knew I couldn't do anything. I had known this; that was why I chose to be bait. There was only one way to make sure of Mom's safety while the rest of them arrived, and that was it.

But now my role was over. I had to trust the others, to trust Julie and Edythe to fight well and remain safe. I resigned to slowly crawl out of the room. Keeping myself low and in the dark, I let my hands feel the wall as a guide. And as I made my painful progress, I watched.

The room was a mess. The windows were shattered, and what had been the doorway was now a splintered hole. One vampire was already torn to pieces, her arms and torso scattered on the floor. I couldn't see Carine or Jasper with the speed at which they moved, but Eleanor was wrestling with a brawny man, their long, large fangs bared at each other. Eleanor had scratches and cuts on her arms. Her opponent had more.

A werewolf, who I recognized as Julie, was limping. She whined, backing into the wall. I gasped as two vampires closed in on her.

"No," I moaned.

They leaped, fangs bared. Her head snapped up. She swerved, avoiding them, and closed her jaw onto one's arm. She shook him like Hulk shook a toy, and threw him into the air. The other roared, and slammed against her side. They tumbled, and I tore my gaze from them, searching for others.

I spied the hungry man from before facing off against Rosalie. Her expression, usually indifferent, was now contorted with rage. She must have listened in on the conversation through the phone. I watched, almost in fascination, as she easily dodged his flexing fingers and rammed her foot into his stomach. It came out his back, caked with black viscera. Her hands gripped his head and twisted. Once. Twice. Three times, then wrenched it off, spurting black blood everywhere. I reminded myself to thank her later.

My eyes roved over again and I spotted them. I let out a gasp.

Jamie was dodging about the center of the room, her once-calm face now twisted with rage. Opposite her was my Edythe, teeth bared, and a large, red-furred wolf. Julie! My heart rose to my throat at the sight of them. I never thought I'd see her again. Either of them.

They were fighting viciously against Jamie, who was barely holding out her own. Already her right arm hung limp at her side. I could see a large, black bruise where her collarbone was; Edythe must have snapped it. Her side and shirt was mottled with dark liquid. She had precision and speed, one of an experienced hunter. From her words before, this hadn't been the first time she'd hunted vampires. Against any other opponent, she would have won.

Not with my Edythe and Julie. Julie, who I was startled to see, fought like she was reading Edythe’s mind. Or Edythe hers. But no, it was too fluid. Julie, Julie. It’s like I’d never seen her before. She looked so fierce, so beautiful.

Edythe moved with the agility of any immortal seventeen years old girl; youthful, graceful, merciless. Her lunges were wild and unpredictable. Julie moved like one used to fighting to protect. Her motions were clean-cut and calculated, a pack leader's mentality. The both of them moved like partners in a dance, filling in where the other left open. They clicked like lock and key, thrust and parry, sword and shield. Jamie was a goner.

They almost had her, and she knew it. A break to the leg or a bite to the neck and she would be gone. Her head snapped about, taking in the scene around her, searching for help. Her allies were falling one by one, and those that didn't had ran. Outside, I heard two distinct, victorious howls. It was a matter of time. She was going to lose.

I had reached the door and was just about to ease myself out when her eyes found me.

Edythe must have read her mind, because she cried out, "NO!"

In one movement, Jamie lunged. As if in slow motion, I saw her coming towards me, mouth open wide, white fangs glinting in the moonlight. I shoved myself out the doorway but it was too late. My arms flew up to shield myself, and her teeth found my wrist.

Two sharp points pierced my flesh. A second later her entire jaw closed about my wrist like a metal trap snapping shut. I could hear the crunch of bone.

"NO!"

Daggers of pain erupted at my wrist like wildfire.

I screamed.

A/N: I had to change so much here, dear god. There was no way I was having Bella run off on her own without telling anyone, so I had to rewrite that whole scene after the letter. Then I took Bly’s lovely rough draft rewrite of this chapter and tweaked it so it made a little more sense with the way the story was now. Basically, there were a lot of changes that I’m sure I’ve forgotten about and let slip through the cracks, but since I’m the only one of the old group left, and have the memory of a broken colander, I don’t think y’all will hold it against me (also I decided to stick with the old technology, cause I like that). I might go back and add some scenes with Julie. I really enjoy the ot3 but I don’t want it to seem like it came out of left field.

[pl-panda]

To Marry a Vigialnte: Part 16

MASTERLIST || First || Previous || Next

To Marry a Vigilante: Part 16

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Chloé couldn’t believe it! They forced her to stay in Gotham Academy’s girls’ dorms. That witch Lila managed to talk Madame Bustier into stopping her from leaving. Marinette had her mother’s permission to stay elsewhere, but apparently, the change in accommodation plans invalidated Chloé’s father’s permission. She would resolve it with a single phone call if someone didn’t steal her phone . She of course tried to report it to Madame Bustier, but her teacher declared that she must’ve lost it somewhere and she shouldn’t be shifting the blame on others. 

That woman’s picture should be in every dictionary, right next to the definition of a hypocrite.

She turned the corridor. She could sleep one evening there and tomorrow Marinette would let her borrow the phone. She could try with one of the girls, but it’s not like she remembered every phone number in existence! She regretted that the akuma attack ruined their plans for the afternoon, but Damian had sword-fighting practice tomorrow and she would have her friend all to herself. 

“You’re Chloé, right?” A blonde cheerleader asked. The Parisian immediately recognized her as Erica and narrowed her eyes. There were five of them and one of her. 

“And you’re the Queen B. of this school. For now .” 

The Gothamite princess had the guts to actually laugh. “You can’t even touch me. You’re just some foreign student that came here on a whim of the Ice Prince.”

“Oh, right. You’re the golden princess of this school.” Chloé mocked her. “Lemme tell you something, Erica. I’ll offer you an escape deal. You leave Damienette alone and you can keep your position on top.”

“Yeah. Like you could be a threat.” A new voice joined. From behind the cheerleaders, a new girl walked. Lila now wore the cheerleader uniform too. “You’re just a walking akuma factory. It’s really no wonder that people avoid you. You caused more possessions in Paris than everyone else combined.”

“And you hold the record for times being akumatized.” The Parisian blonde retorted. “Ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous! You think you can take the Chloé Bourgeois?”

“Oh! We don’t think…” Erica started.

“We know.” Lila finished. 

“The deal is simple. You will stop your friendship with Maribrat and we will let you keep some dignity.” 

“Or we will make you a social outcast. Not only at school, but in the whole of Gotham.”

Inside, Chloé was raging. She wished she could show them what Cass taught her, but she quelled the idea quickly. I definitely spend too much time with Sabine and the Waynes… She thought to herself. Instead, she grinned. “You know the difference between a threat and a warning?”

“What are you babbling about?” One of the cheerleaders snorted. 

“A warning is a threat that will actually come to pass. And I warn you. You’re messing with fire here. Damian was raised very old-fashioned. He will draw blood to defend the honor of his angel.” She decided that they could receive a warning. It’s not like they would listen. “And Marinette’s aunt is very well connected.” Then, she decided to drive the nail deeper. “Plus, MDC’s client list is quite long and none would appreciate that you try to bully their favorite designer.”

“Like that doormat…” Lila started, but Chloé tested the glare Cass taught her. It worked well enough. 

“You’re not dealing with Maribear. You’re dealing with me. And I’m not going to lose.” 

“What’s going on here?” Allegra walked toward them and stood next to Chloé. 

“Scatter.” Lila snapped at her. 

“Funny. I was about to say the same thing,” she retorted. Now she stood side by side with Chloé and both stared at them. Allegra had an aura of confidence around her. 

“Be careful who you stick with, Kane. You’ll do well not to antagonize me.”

“Just because your mother married a famous baseball player doesn’t make me respect you more, Boyle.” 

“It’s Layton ,”The angry cheerleader corrected. 

“Right. I must’ve forgotten. She does change her last name a lot…” Allegra smiled. 

“You’re in over your head, Kane. You’ll do better to stay with your little outcast club.”

“Nah. I’m good. Also, don’t you have practice in five minutes? I heard the coach is in a mood today.” The mayor’s daughter smirked. “It would be a shame if he made you run around with the players.” 

This made all the girls quickly scatter to get to the practice, leaving Lila and Erica alone. “You’ve just made an enemy, Kane.” 

“You’re an inconvenience at best…” She dismissed the threat. Lila decided to cut their losses and dragged the fuming Erica away, sending the two blondes a murderous glare.

“Thanks for the backup,” Chloé started. “Of course I didn’t need any, but still.”

“No problem. I always hated that self-appointed princess.” 

“And have you seen her hair?” The Parisian huffed. “Utterly Ridiculous!”

“And I’m pretty sure her dress is too short by the school standards.”

Chloé smirked. “I think we’ll get along just fine.”

-----------

After Bruce returned, they tried to figure out what was taken from the inside of the vault. Out of various precious weapons, documents, several property deeds, the only thing that was missing turned out to be the content of the wall safe. 

During the night patrol, Marinette and Damian scoured the city for potential akumas. While he dealt with criminals, she often stopped by the victims to calm them and gave some support. After serious butt-kicking for the criminals. It just wouldn’t do for Damian to get all the fun. The superhero/vigilante duo (nobody was sure which one, not even them) made a positive first impression on the city. Citizens seemed to like them, both for their efficiency and how they always stopped to talk. 

After, Marinette noted that their transformations could hold for much longer now since they were together in this. When asked, Tikki explained that now that she had Chat Noir that was mature and they were technically both adults as far as magic was concerned, she could start developing her full potential. 

After the short report to Alfred, the teens left the Batcave to change into pajamas. Marinette fell asleep almost immediately, but Damian stayed awake for a bit. He swore he would protect his Habibti. No matter how far he would have to go. 

-----------

Marinette and Damian had roughly half of their classes together. Sadly, she didn’t share too much with her best friend, since Chloé was more into business management than arts and fashion. It was mostly the problem of the level. Classes that Marinette had at beginner, the Parisian blonde had at a higher level and vice-versa.

When she arrived at her class, Claude and Jon were saving her a place between them, which would help to protect her from the classmates that ended in the same group. There were also several GA students that she would rather not sit close to (Erica’s bunch). Generally speaking, the first part of her day went well. 

The same couldn’t have been said about Damian. He, Chloé, and Allegra were saddled with the class. And to his utter dread, there were no free places next to each other. They tried to ask some students to move. Well, Damian tried to threaten them, which worked, but too late. The teacher entered and decided to put Damian between Alya and Lila. It was as if the universe was punishing him for something. He suspected that Mister Scarlet did that on purpose to egg him. With this one, he had no idea what he did to make him dislike the Wayne heir. But the way he acted toward him made it clear that he took pleasure in the situation Damian was put in: Between Alya’s nagging to leave Marinette and ‘return’ to Lila, and the Liar who kept whispering stories about their common past. 

Finally, after they got to go for lunch, Damian stormed out of the class. Everyone in the corridor made way for him. His scowl was enough to deter anyone from trying to approach him. Well, anyone but Maps.

“Damian! You’re back!” She leaped at him and it took all of his willpower not to draw a sword. 

“Tt. Mizoguchi. It’s not the best moment.” He growled. 

“But you’re back! Did the headmaster cancel your expulsion!?”

“No. He just forgot to file the expulsion files within the week of the offense. Ergo, I was never expelled. I just joined the exchange program.” He explained. 

Her eyes practically shined. “Coooool.” 

“Tt. Can you let go of my arm?” He was really hoping it would work. 

“Nope. I just met you again. We’re glued.” 

“Sup Dames?” Claude chose that moment to appear.

“Tt. I’ve got a parasite.”

“That I can see!” The other boy laughed. Most people were still steering clear from Wayne and whoever was with him. They valued their health for the most part. 

“I’m not a parasite. I’m Maps!” The girl greeted Claude, who in turn made an exaggerated bow. 

“And I’m Claudius Chase. But please call me Claude.” He made a mock fighting stance. “Like Jean-Claude Van Damme.” 

“More like Jack Clown van Lame,” Damian muttered. “Your stance is all wrong. I could take you out in seconds.”

“Of course you could. You’re b…” The Wayne heir covered her mouth with his hand. 

“Tt. Not here. Now if you would let go of my hand, you parasite, I’m sure Habibti is waiting for me.” 

“Habibti?” She asked after letting go.

“His girlfriend.”

You could actually see Maps’ eyes form into twin stars. “Can I meet her? Can I meet her?”

“Since when are you into fashion?”

“Huh? Who said anything about fashion. She’s your girlfriend though, which means she must be sooo cooool!” Maps was practically vibrating. 

“Hero worship much?” Claude joked.

“Tt. Fine. Let’s go.”

The three arrived at the Cafeteria, where Allegra, Chloé, Jon, and Felix were already eating. They had lasagna that day. Quite a lot of people were whispering when Damian appeared, more so than usual, but nobody dared to look at him. When he sat at the table next to Marinette, they did their best not to stare.

“Grumpy Cat?” She asked, a bit worried. “You’re… tense.” 

“Tt. Because of that socially-inept, talentless, petty bookworm,” he seethed, “I had to sit between Rossi and Cesaire.” 

Immediately, Marinette pulled him into a tight hug. “Oh, my poor Kitty.”

This caused some of the gathered, who knew Damian from the previous year, to immediately tense. Some of the students sitting nearby (mostly females) even grinned, thinking that here died the relationship. There was no way that Ice Prince would allow anyone to refer to him as Kitty. Getting him on the first-name basis was considered a privilege allowed only to the family (and strangely Claude). 

To their immeasurable surprise, Damian didn’t explode. Instead, he melted slightly into the hug and some of the anger left him. It wasn’t a long hug, but after it, he was now acting less like a walking grenade looking for its pin. At least three people awwed at them. It was just too pure.

“Whoah!” And then there was Maps, who had the subtlety of a steam-train speeding through the Wild West. “You’re so cute together!” She zoomed next to Marinette to get a better look.

“And you’re…” Marinette eyed the overly energetic girl. She was short, with hair that reached barely below her ears. 

“Mia Mizoguchi. But you can call me Maps. I’m Damian’s friend.” 

“Tt. More like a stray.”

“Damian! Don’t be a Grumpy Cat.”

“Besides, isn’t collecting strays kinda a Wayne Tradition at this point.” Felix deadpanned. Everyone started laughing. Damian gave a dignified smirk. The blond proved to be able to match him in intellectual discussion, which gave some basis for mutual respect between them. 

The group talked a bit more about their classes. Marinette and Chloé compared every detail of their experience in the States with what it was like back in Paris. Maps was a fountain of questions, even if some of them were a bit… strange. But Marinette still felt she would like the little girl. That she was in the same class as her surprised her. 

After lunch came time for more classes. When they finished, Damian was supposed to stay for training while Marinette and Chloé would go shopping. They were already outside the gates when three rather packed teens from the year ahead stepped in their way. 

“You think you can steal Erica’s man and then threaten her?” The one in the middle asked. It was clear he was angry and not exactly thinking clearly. “Gotham Academy Grackles stay together. If you think you can just prance here and take over, you have another thing coming.”

“Um… Sure.” Mari just nodded. “Now excuse me while I go away.” She tried to move past them, but one decided to make a fatal mistake of trying to grab the front of her shirt. She raised her left arm under the grip, lifting his hand slightly. It exposed his stomach for the moment, which she took full advantage of and delivered a knee-kick to his liver. When he folded in half from the pain, as much as he could with her still supporting his hand, she then used her right arm to deliver a cutter toward the back of his head.

The boy was out cold in less than five seconds. 

Seeing their friend attacked, the other two charged at her. Marinette ducked under the punch from the first one and headbutted him in the stomach. She then wrapped her arms around his left legs and lifted him up. He fell on the ground and tripped the slower one. When they both were down, Marinette stomped on the hand of the one on top. There was an audible crack that signaled she managed to damage the bones. He would not be fighting. The one under tossed his pained friend away and jumped on his feet. He managed to get Marinette in a chokehold, but she pushed her arms between his extended arms and spread them apart. When he was exposed, she jumped up and kicked him with both legs. While she landed without any injury, the bigger player crashed into his two friends. 

“The police are on their way,” Chloé informed, putting away the phone that mysteriously found itself in her possession earlier that morning, giving more credence to the theory that she simply misplaced it. 

“What’s going on here!” A harsh voice boomed behind them. Hammerhead was standing there in all his glory. “To my office. All five.” 

“Maman’s going to be here in just five minutes,” Mari informed him. She was still full of adrenaline. 

“I don’t care.” He seethed in response. 

The only conscious boy helped his friends stand up. First the one with a broken hand, then they lifted the unconscious one together. They limped through the campus toward where the office was located. Behind them, Marinette and Chloé walked with heads held high. Tomorrow, the school would be full of gossip, but the bluenette was all too used to it by now and the blonde would run her PR magic to change it into something positive. Chloé loved playing the crowd. 

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“I’m here.” Sabine practically stormed inside the office. “Now could you explain, sir, what is it about?”

“Your daughter got into an… altercation with older students today. Right in front of the school.” Headmaster Hammer started.

“Ah. And you’re curious if we’ll be pressing charges?” The woman asked, cocking an eyebrow. 

“Charges?” She managed to baffle the man. 

“Attempted assault?”

“Madame. You misunderstood me. Your daughter…”

“Defended herself. Yes.” Sabine cut in, her eyes filled with cold fury. “Unless I’m mistaken, Self-defence is not a crime.”

“You can’t call self-defense stomping on…”

“To prevent further fighting? Debatable. She is smaller, physically weaker, and was outnumbered. A good lawyer would argue that it was necessary for her to act that way for her safety and to avoid further fighting.” She stared down at the headmaster. “As for the charges…”

At that, two officers walked in. Hammer recognized the first one as Renee Montoya. The other was a blonde officer wearing a tactical vest.

“Sorry, it took so long. We’ve been a little short-staffed since the mess with akumas started.”

“Don’t worry. Luckily, my daughter managed to defend herself. Now, officer, what must we do if we wish to press charges?” Sabine asked with a cold voice, never breaking eye-contact with the headmaster. 

“That…”

“I’ll explain everything while officer Sawyer takes the attackers into custody.” 

“Thank you so much.” The older woman finally broke the eye-contact and turned toward Montoya. She smiled with her usual peaceful smile, but the fire was still in her eyes. “My daughter is part of the exchange program while I’m visiting my niece.”

Marinette was stunned by how well her mother could take control of the situation. She wasn’t sure what precisely she was doing, but it was definitely effective. 

“Foreigners?” The officer asked, surprised. “I could hardly hear the accent. France?”

“Yes. Paris.” Sabine smiled. “Neither I nor any of my charges are really familiar with the procedures here.”

“I will walk you through it. Headmaster?” The policewoman finally acknowledged the elderly man in the room. “Were the parents of the culprits notified yet?”

“Not. Yet.” He muttered through clenched teeth.

“We will take it from here.” She smirked at the headmaster. “You will be notified if any further input is needed, sir.” She started to walk away and motioned for the three women to follow her. 

Outside, Damian was waiting with a sword. Luckily, there was no blood on it. Yet .

“Hello, Kitty. Don’t worry. I’ve managed it.” 

“Tt. I’ll still challenge them to an honor duel.” He scoffed. 

“You will probably have to wait a bit. I don’t think…” The officer took a glance at Sabine, who even with her smile looked like she was ready to fight God on equal footing. “They probably won’t be coming back to school this year.” 

“They won’t.” Chloé, Sabine, and Damian said at the same time. But they probably had different things in mind. Or maybe just Chloé…

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