#so i just want to repeat again that everyone is entitled to their own opinion

[softpine]

whoever the anon is that constantly finds a way to hate on elaine, please stop 😭 you’re entitled to dislike whoever you want, but it’s getting tiring to hear. i don’t want to block you because the other things you say are perfectly reasonable and i would be happy to answer them, but it’s clear at this point that nothing elaine does will satisfy you so i see no point in hashing it out

[dancermk]

HELLO MY FELLOW TRAVELERS!

I, like many viewers, have been completely entranced by Hawk and Tim’s love story in Fellow Travelers. As a mature queer person, this show has been very emotional, and I am deeply invested. (I WILL riot if Tim doesn’t get to die in Hawk’s arms, and know that he is, and has always been, loved by Hawk.) But I digress.

Something that I have been fascinated by are the differing opinions that have surfaced about the characters, especially Hawk. I’m not looking for any arguments here, everyone is entitled to their opinion, and this is simply mine. To me, Hawk falls hard and fast for Tim. He breaks all his own rules for Tim - they topple over like a house of cards.

When we are introduced to Hawk, he’s cold and heartless with the men he hooks up with - they are nothing more than a body to fulfil his sexual needs and desires. He doesn’t do repeats and he doesn’t bring them home. But Tim, he instantly begins returning to, gets him a job, then allows him into his own apartment, etc. When Tim pushes back, Hawk relents further, letting him in emotionally, sharing parts of his past, crossing lines by introducing him to others in his circle, and so on.

Hawk is a traumatised man, carrying guilt and anger and shame, and a bucket load of fear! Yes, he has some internalised homophobia, but interestingly, he’s also extremely righteous about his homosexuality -and I don’t believe he thinks being gay is wrong in any way. (His response to his father is indicative of this).

I can personally say that I’ve never thought it was wrong to be queer, yet I spent much of my life hiding who I was and feeling shame. It’s an odd thing! Perhaps it is that the shame forms purely from what is outside of us, while what is inside of us can love another person of the same sex, knowing it is right and pure. Perhaps these contradictions between self and society are what causes so much pain and conflict?

But back to Hawk. Hawk is undoubtedly most affected by his teenage first love experience. A love that he fucked up through his own fears (fear for many men is unacceptable and a sign of weakness), and now carries the burden of believing he is responsible for their death. Hawk doesn’t allow himself to love again, until Tim. And we see many times throughout the show how much Hawk fears losing Tim. And in the end he’ll have to face that fear. I think that, in part, not attempting to have a life with Tim, is also fuelled by his fear of fucking it up and losing Tim - so it’s easier to just not attempt it! In episode 7, when he loses his son, part of that spiral is Hawk recognising that he can’t really prevent loss, and he wasted his life trying to be something he’s not - still losing his child and Tim along with it.

But Hawk is a survivor! And no one has the right to hate or judge him for it. I don’t think some young people truly understand what it feels like to live in a world where who you love can put you in jail, and destroy your life. I grew up in the 70s/80s and my experiences were bad enough, but I try so very hard to think about what it was like before that! When being queer was a crime and a mental illness! That’s pure terror! And for Hawk, he chose to survive the best way he knew how, and he wasn’t able to change because that’s fucking hard when all you’ve known is living in constant ‘fight or flight,’ and when have chronic trauma and experience collective trauma.

I think in episode 8 we’ll finally get to see Hawk grow - I certainly hope so - because he deserves to be free. Our beautiful Skippy has been free for some time, and while we mourn for the cruelty of a world that would take such a truly decent man, I am glad he got to live freely. Being closeted is the worst kind of suffering- a compartmentalised and fragmented existence where you are never truly whole, and therefore can never be the best version of yourself.

Before I go, I just wanted to also talk about being in a closeted relationship-which I experienced in my youth. I think that Hawk and Tim’s intense and toxic and exquisitely beautiful relationship, in part, arises from this. Because two closeted people in love live their relationship in secret, in a bubble, only in certain rooms, with none of the outside world reflected back at them. It becomes the two of you against the world. It’s so insular. Hawk and Tim literally live their 1950s relationship within two rooms - their apartments. All their memories are held within those walls. And it only belongs to them. They know each in ways that no other living soul does. It’s all-consuming and often unhealthy, but also stupidly romantic.

Anyway, sorry for this long winded post that no one will read and is likely full of grammatical errors because I’m tired! This atheist is praying we get everything we need from episode 8! Acceptance, forgiveness, understanding resolution, healing and a whole lot of love! ❤️

Cheers queers! 🏳️‍🌈

PS Matt and Johnny are exquisite on and off screen and I am so thankful to them for bringing these characters and this story into our lives!

[sunniedesi]

In Defense of Future Diary...

TW: lots of yapping.

Making a small essay for Future Diary is something I’ve been meaning to do for a while. Since my entire blog is dedicated to the series, it only feels right to put something like this out into the ether. However, I’m never sure of the topics that I want to discuss the most. Do I write a defense for the show? My reasons for loving it so much? Its relevance and importance for anime culture? An analysis of Yuno’s character? There’s so much I feel you could say, but I never find the right words to express my feelings coherently. Today, I’ll make the attempt, though. I’ll go over all of the aforementioned questions here, mostly focusing on my personal opinions and feelings regarding the show. I don’t have much experience writing essays or analyses of media, so sorry in advance if my yapping is all over the place.

To begin, I should probably address the elephant in the room: Future Diary, despite its popularity and almost cult-classic status, has turned into a show people love to hate. You see it everywhere, when it comes to reviews, comments, opinion pieces, you name it, if it has Future Diary on the title, people will let you know all the gripes they have with the show. And while I tend to feel defensive or even saddened when I see so much hatred directed at my favorite show… I don’t necessarily blame anyone for feeling that way. I don’t want to be one of those people who pretends to hold the intellectual high-ground, acting as if everyone else is media-illiterate and I’m the one who truly gets the meaning of the series. At the end of the day, it’s just an anime, it’s not that deep. Everyone’s gonna like what they like; we all have different tastes and interests, so it’s only natural we all hold such different opinions about the show, especially given its campy, gory and almost edgy nature. Future Diary is definitely a product of early 2000’s trends, which some people (me lol) appreciate, and others certainly don’t.

That being said, while I respect people disliking the show for personal reasons, there are certain criticisms I see thrown its way that are not necessarily warranted. These issues can be boiled down to the following categories: “plot-holes,” a weak protagonist and toxic pairings. I’ll delve into all of these in a second, but I must say, the amount of times I’ve seen these specific points parroted over and over again makes me believe that many of the people making these arguments are piggybacking off of one another. It’s almost like they’re following a trend, repeating how the protagonist “sucks ass” and that the plot makes zero sense, without showing any examples as to how. 

It’s really common to find shallow arguments like those in comments sections and forums, but since I don’t want to feel like I’m barking up a tree in writing this essay, I decided to look for a source that encapsulated all of the common criticisms, while also backing them up with examples. Now, there are many good video essays out there on Future Diary, my personal favorite is by The Hot Box. But as far as critical pieces go, the one I found that goes the most in-depth is by the creator NezumiVA, titled: Mirai Nikki is Garbage, and Here’s Why. I’ll be referencing the video as I go along, but please note that while I disagree with many of this creator’s arguments, I don’t intend this to be a personal attack. As I said earlier, we’re all entitled to our different tastes and opinions, I can respect them disliking the series while having my own criticisms to give regarding the video. Just a little disclaimer so my intentions aren’t misconstrued here. 

With that out of the way, let’s take a deeper look into the main three arguments I mentioned before:

“The plot-holes eat up the show”

If you’ve been in the fandom for a while, you know that this is probably one of the most common criticisms levied towards Future Diary, and perhaps the one that holds the most weight. Or at least it would be, if it weren’t for the fact that “plot-holes” aren’t exactly the issue people are pointing at here. To explain, I believe people who dish out this claim all have different understandings of the definition of “plot-hole,” so to clarify: a plot-hole is an inconsistency, a contradiction in the narrative. For example, Yuno’s diary is all about Yukki, if she were to have diary entries not about him, that could be considered a plot-hole, as it contradicts the original narrative. A smaller detail being unexplained or overlooked for the sake of pacing is not a plot-hole. A flaw, yes, but as long as it doesn’t contradict what’s already been established in the story, it’s not a plot-hole. 

On one hand, it is true that there are certain Deus Ex Machina moments that aren’t properly explained in the show (heck, the god of this universe is called that for a reason), such as: how does 5th acquire all of his booby traps? Or where did 9th pull that motorcycle from? Why are characters so quick to forgive/forget certain events? These are smaller details that aren’t properly justified on-screen for the sake of pacing and making the show more interesting. You could possibly count this more as a case of poor characterization, particularly with 5th’s character having a lot of knowledge despite his age or Hinata quickly accepting the coin toss challenge despite having an advantage. Given the show only has 26 episodes, it’s only natural that detailed explanations for smaller details are omitted to make the show flow quicker and be more entertaining. While this may bother some people, I don’t find it to be such a big deal, or at least not a reason to dogpile on the show, when many other animes with shorter runtime fall victim to poor characterization as well. 

Many deem the plot nonsensical for missing these smaller explanations, but again, I find that exaggerated as they’re much, much trivial details that the majority of people don’t think of or focus on when watching the show. The video I referenced touches on the plot being illogical several times, not necessarily mentioning plot-holes per se, but complaining that many of the justifications behind certain plot points are unrealistic or contrived, though let’s be real here… since when is anime realistic? Future Diary, I would argue, does a good job of balancing very unrealistic scenarios with some realistic characters (like Yukki, but we’ll get into that later), which is what makes it interesting to watch. After all, what’s the fun in watching a fantasy show if it’s completely grounded in reality? Not to mention that many of the points brought up in the video aren’t contrived, especially if you were paying attention to the show. For example, the scene of Yuno meditating to figure out Reisuke’s plan. This wasn’t a Deus Ex Machina moment, it was foreshadowing of the fact she has her first-world memories locked away, and the meditation was her trying to access those memories. Same thing with Bacchus having an overpowered diary, it isn’t for the sake of it, he literally designed it to be that way, because he was the one who presented the idea of the diaries to Deus in the first place.

I’m getting a little side-tracked here, but you get the point. Ultimately, the worst sin a show can commit is being boring, and while Future Diary has its flaws in pacing and characterization, it contributes in keeping the viewers hooked to the action, packing its small run of 26 episodes with quite a bit of entertainment. Moreover, a lot of people overreact to these so-called “plot-holes”, yet they also fail to pay attention as to why things happen as they do in the show. Many of these criticisms can be summed up as either: trivial details that are omitted since they have little relevance to the plot and/or people not paying attention to what’s going on. 

Moving on, let’s tackle another very, very popular argument:

“Yukiteru is a total pushover (to put it nicely).” 

This is, without a doubt, the most common criticism I’ve seen people have of the show. I’m not sure if this is because people are used to the upbeat, overpowered protagonist trope in anime, but people don’t realize that Yukki being frustrating, awkward and terrified is an important part of the show’s storytelling, not to mention relatively unique. Very rarely do we see a realistic portrayal of a teenage protagonist in anime, and it is important for the show since it serves as a contrast to the other characters, all dark, callous and obsessed with the goal of becoming a God. Yukki is the only character not interested in any of this at the beginning. All he wanted was to escape reality with his phone and imaginary friends, and he's now thrusted into this terrible and hopeless situation. How exactly is a young boy expected to react under these circumstances? 

Teenagers are naive, dumb, selfish, all characteristics portrayed in Yukiteru, and these characteristics are put under scrutiny by every one of the diary owners, constantly telling him to grow a pair and stop using Yuno. This is easier said than done when you’re used to avoiding every little bit of responsibility in your life, and a girl who’s self-reportedly “crazy good at killing people” suddenly thrusts into your life ready to do all the work for you. Yukki is indeed a very flawed character, but that isn’t an accident, it is an intentional addition. It’s what makes him interesting; it pushes conflict into the show, and most importantly, drives home one of the main lessons of the show with Yukki’s development: fear doesn’t mean you’re not brave, it’s having that fear and pushing forward that makes you brave. A little corny, I know, but a valuable lesson for the Survival Game. 

Every character has an incentive for becoming God, and they’re utterly consumed by it to the point of insanity. Even a character like 4th, who was originally concerned with the goal of bringing order and justice rather than more carnage to the game gets carried away when a proper incentive for God’s seat comes into play: saving his son. In a Survival Game where we're surrounded by the most cunning and twisted of characters, killers, terrorists, people in corrupt positions of power, Yukki stands out like a sore thumb for retaining his humanity throughout it all, unwilling to get his hands dirty, rather willing to see hope in everyone else. It comes across as naive and all-too trusting. This is especially true for his father, but considering how little people he has to rely on, plus his childish hopes of seeing his family back together, his forgiveness towards him makes sense. And the same can be said for Yuno, the one constant he’s got all throughout the game. Despite the abuse and manipulation, she’s ultimately got his best interests at heart, but I’m getting ahead of myself with this point.

Eventually, the circumstances that Yukki goes through (namely his parents’ death) put that humanity, kindness and mercy, the staples of his personality, to test. It’s a testament to how desperate situations can corrupt even the most innocent of individuals. Yukiteru goes from a hopeful individual to a callous killer, no different from Yuno and equally as selfish. Similarly enough, we know thanks to her third-world-self that Yuno was originally a normal, happy girl with the hopes of finally having a loving family taking care of her. All of this, to then be tortured by the people who were supposed to bring that peaceful family life to her. 

Yukki being a weakling may be frustrating to some, it is certainly brought up many times during the video essay, but it’s an important factor that drives the plot and many of Future Diary’s lessons about growth and accountability. Besides, the anime certainly wouldn’t be as interesting to watch if every character was just an OP know-it-all like Akise. Which no hate to him, but the show wouldn’t be the same if every character were like him.

And speaking of Akise, I’ll take the opportunity to mention a point in the video essay that bothered me a bit. The creator says the show is “queerbaiting” with his character, because Akise’s attraction towards Yukki is forced, but I don’t see exactly how this is queerbaiting. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t queerbaiting when a character is insinuated to be gay, yet it’s kept ambiguous enough to never address it? The show straight-up explains the reason behind Akise’s attraction to Yukki. His love is forced because it was created by Deus to further his investigation about Yukki and Yuno. Akise himself is a fabrication of Deus. It is literally explained in episode 23. You can’t bait the audience into believing a character is gay if you explicitly tell the audience the character is gay lol.

But that’s one of the smaller issues I had with the video’s criticisms. My biggest gripes were actually the following: at the beginning of the essay, this creator talks about how many of the plot points in the show are contrived and illogical, but at the same time, they dislike the characters having tragic backstories that explain how they went on to become twisted individuals. Isn’t it a little contradictory that you complain about a character acting unnatural, yet when the explanation for their behavior comes up, you completely disregard it? They go as far as to say Esuno hates women and is misogynistic for his portrayal of female psychosis, and the use of SA as a tragic backstory being distasteful. Because, according to this creator, people who have been victimized never go on to become terrible people themselves, and that this is a “problematic stereotype.” 

To say that this worldview is incredibly simplistic and naive is putting it mildly. Being a victim doesn’t exempt you from the capability of hurting others, and in fact, the opposite is often true. Hurt people hurt people, that is another main theme in Future Diary, and one of the things I love about it so much. It doesn’t make its characters victims of terrible situations for the sake of pitying them, but to portray their natural descent into madness from being corrupted by a cruel and unrelenting world. Yuno, Yukki, Minene, Tsubaki, these characters all started out as normal until life turned them into the nihilistic monsters they became. They’re morally gray, an example of what you can become when your ethics and moral worldview is tested by society so many times, it ultimately turns you into a societal outcast. Which only makes it funnier that one of the questions asked in the video is “are we supposed to like these characters?” Yes and no, that’s the fun of writing morally gray characters.

I often see these takes with people who fail to understand that the portrayal of something in media ≠ endorsement. It’s the crux of people who lack media literacy, the failure to understand morally gray or just straight up evil characters as protagonists. The media itself isn’t telling you to repeat their actions, it is an exploration of how these actions manifest in the first place, a cautionary tale, if you will. I know that having evil or twisted protagonists isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but to accuse the story or the author of malicious intent would be completely missing the point of the story’s purpose. Not to mention, that it is important for stories like this to exist, to put us in the shoes of those who enact harm, to understand why they do it and keep us from becoming like them.

The show doesn’t justify any of their actions, in fact, it often shows them for what they are: twisted and morally corrupt; it is on the characters themselves to bear the burdens of these actions. A clear example of this is the confrontation that Yukki has with his friends nearing the end of episode 22. It is probably one of my favorite scenes in the entire show: Yukki being forced to face all of his demons at once, realizing just how much damage he has caused, damage that he later has to mend in his final confrontation with Yuno to finally put an end to everyone’s suffering. It is dense, crude, and it is certainly necessary for both him and Yuno. 

Funnily enough, this youtuber goes on to say the following about Yuno’s background: “I really don’t care what her (back)story pans out to look like… her actions are still not excusable.” Which is true, just because someone was abused doesn’t justify them perpetuating the same abuse later. However, they then crush their own point by claiming that Yuno’s obsessions started all because of “a passing conversation.” I guess they weren’t lying when they said that they didn’t care about Yuno’s backstory… because chalking up her obsession as solely a result of that scene is completely disregarding her background. That conversation in the classroom did start Yuno’s fixation towards Yukki, but it is not the root of her obsessive tendencies. Yuno herself believes it to be, but this is an idea that is squandered by Yukki in his final confrontations with her. Moreover, if you paid attention to her backstory, you would understand it is all due to her childhood neglect. And similarly, Yukki’s attraction towards Yuno stems from this as well.

This brings me to the final criticism:

“Yuno and Yukki’s relationship is problematic, toxic and makes no sense.”

There is no denying that Yuno and Yukki start out as an incredibly toxic and troublesome pairing, using each other for their own selfish wants instead of working with each other. This is the Achilles heel in their dynamic, and it is often the cause of their troubles. Yuno acts impulsive, unstable and manipulative towards Yukki due to her insecurities and debilitating obsession, while Yukki pushes all responsibility to Yuno due to his own lack of a spine. They hurt each time and time again, yet they can’t help but be with each other. And this is because, in a twisted way, they compliment each other. 

On one hand, we have a social outcast, ignored by everyone including his family, visibly alone and afraid of being hurt by others, but still seeing the best in people. Then on the other hand, we have a popular girl from a prominent family, visibly perfect, but in reality just as alone due to abuse she experiences at home, making her view people as fundamentally cruel. On the outside they’re opposites, but deep down, they’re both lonely, and terrified of said loneliness. It is only when they meet, when Yukki shows her the kindness she was missing for years and when Yuno gives him the support he had always craved, that they fulfill each other’s needs. By becoming acquainted with Yuno and the Survival Game, Yukki becomes increasingly darker, eventually maturing at the end of the show, while Yukki awakens Yuno’s empathy and pulls her back from the darkness, as we see when she falters to hurt third-world Yuno and her parents. 

Their complementary personalities are even referenced by their diaries, which only work seamlessly if paired. They balance each other out perfectly, bringing out the best of each other, but only after learning to push back on their worst characteristics, which is also true for real-life relationships. In truth, just like these two, people are flawed, traumatized and generally toxic to one another. There’s no such thing as people or relationships that start out perfect from the get-go, they need to learn to grow together. 

In that sense, this is what makes the ending of the show so powerful to me. Yukki isn’t set on killing Yuno or becoming God anymore. He’s finally taking responsibility, coming to terms with the awful deeds he’s done, and the fact that he can’t undo them. Instead, he wants to help Yuno come to terms with her own demons, finally giving back to her what she needs and not something for his own benefit. Similarly, Yuno realizes just how off the deep-end she’s gone when she meets her past self, acknowledging that she’s lost her original goal, and that repeating the cycle of hurt won’t fix her already broken spirit. That world isn’t for her, and so she finally ends the hurt, giving her and Yukki the peace they need. 

Many people don’t like Redial because they see it as an undeserved Happy Ending for two awful individuals, but the way I like to see it is as a form of redemption. Both characters, in the end, do what they have to do to restore order in the world. Yukki pays for his sins in the void, finally a God but at the cost of mourning what could’ve been. First-World Yuno ends the suffering she’s putting herself through so her new self can thrive, almost akin to breaking free from her past traumas to finally heal. The new self regains those memories, not to sulk, but to build from them, going back with Yukki to start a new world that isn’t characterized by their original hurt. In a way, it's a story about how the most downtrodden of individuals can find solace in love, break from their past and learn to heal together. For me, it’s cathartic and fulfilling to watch.

To finish this lengthy post, I feel it’s appropriate to mention the importance of Future Diary’s characters, and more specifically, Yuno. The video describes her writing as shallow and contrived, but I’ve already addressed that in the previous paragraphs. Many people love chalking her up to “cRaZy YaNdErE gUrL™ 🤪​,” but she’s so, so much more than that. Her character actually has a lot of depth if you pay attention to her story: she’s a girl, an orphan who went on to be neglected by her foster father and abused by her foster mother, resulting in complex trauma, insecurities and fear of abandonment that she tries to hide and overcompensate for in her overly aggressive tendencies. Her obsession in avoiding the loss of the only person she has becomes her demise, as she lives in a loop of torment all for the sake of not being alone again, a cycle of hurt only she has the power of breaking if she finds the strength to do it. Whether it was intentional or not, Yuno portrays a lot of the issues people with mental illness, such as BPD, struggle with. 

Now, claiming that Yuno is a perfect, one-to-one representation of BPD would be reducing this disorder to a caricature, there’s obviously so much more to BPD than what you see in this portrayal. But, I feel like out of the huge list of characters that fall under the “yandere” or crazy girl trope, she’s probably one of the best written ones in anime. I know she’s often dubbed the “yandere queen,” but seriously, it’s rare to see media committing to this trope and properly characterizing it. I would go as far as to say she’s the best character I’ve seen written in this genre, only sharing that spot with another character from a certain game (but given that the mere mention of its name is enough to ensue controversy, I’ll abstain from talking about it here 🙄​). A big portion of characters within this trope are quite two-dimensional, without clear motives for their obsessions, or having their issues played up for laughs (I’m looking at you, Anna Nishikinomiya). Heck, many of the characters associated with the trope aren’t actual yanderes, like is the case for Shion Sonozaki or Lucy from Elfen Lied. 

Yuno’s character is rich and interesting to watch, she isn’t just some “crazy girl” for the sake of it. She’s a product of tragedy, only motivated by the hope of finally having Yukki alleviate all of her insecurities and sorrows. I’ve always found the “yandere” trope interesting since it delves into the lengths people are capable of going over an obsession, and how these form to begin with. Given how complex, sensitive and even personal this topic can be, it’s important to have characters like this be properly written, and I’m glad that Yuno set a standard for this back in her day, even if many people don’t take her character seriously. 

I think it’s important to close up this post repeating the sentiment I had at the beginning. My purpose in writing this defense isn’t so much to force people into liking the show, and even opinions I disagree with like the ones in NezumiVA’s video are valid in their own right, as everyone has different perspectives in interpreting media. This is simply my take as someone who’s been a fan of the show for a really long time, since I don’t see many in-depth essays for Future Diary out there. It is a show that has stuck with me for its lessons on learning to be brave, healing from the past and selfless love. As silly as it may sound talking about an anime, it’s something that I can always look back to and smile, laugh or cry along with. Despite people’s conflicting views and endless criticisms, it will never fail to have a special place in my heart. Given how much time I’ve dedicated to this series, it’s only fair I dedicated a little bit of that time explaining my love for it too. And if you made it this far down the post, I would also like to thank you for dedicating a little bit of your time to my shower thoughts as well!

[onceuponapuffin]

Fanatic Intervention Part 14!!!

Happy Birthday to regular reader and commenter @ritz-writes !! :D

Here's the sculpture mentioned in the fic: https://noma.org/collection/history-of-the-conquest/

You'll notice that the poll at the bottom isn't anything suuuuper important. There's just some plot things that I want to get running in the next section, so I'm gonna be writing it up and posting it tomorrow. But I promise you that it's still an important choice to make (also idk what to pick so that means you all get to pick lol ).

Okay! Here we go! Back to New Orleans with The Anti-Apocalypse Crew!

Beginning || Previous || Next

*************************

Now that you all were in the city, it only took Anathema the next morning to hone in on her signal. To Aziraphale's delight, it led you all to the sculpture garden at the New Orleans Museum of Art. To your delight, it led more specifically to a sculpture of a person riding a snail (to victory no doubt).

"I think this might be my favourite statue ever," You say aloud (because this author is assuming you would agree with her opinion). There is a person you don’t know standing in front of the statue. He gives a dissatisfied huff.

"It's called 'History of the Conquest,'" he tells you, despite not being asked, "The ever-slow and over-confident march of the entitled towards a future where they're in charge. Everyone else suffers while they promise glory and prosperity."

Your jaw drops open. This person looks like a 'surfer dude,' but is talking like someone who's spent most of their life in a cubicle changing 1s to 0s for 8 straight hours a day.

"WOW! That is BLEAK," is what finally comes out of your mouth. "Proper ray of sunshine, you are."

Okay, that sounded really British. You briefly wonder about the effect of spending so much time around Crowley and Aziraphale before Surfer Dude starts to laugh.

"I've seen a few things, human. Been 'round longer than you've been alive, will be long after you die. You're no more than a moth in my eyes."

"Wow," You can't help but repeat yourself, "Again, bleak." Also rude, but priorities.

"It is what it is," Surfer Dude replies. You shake your head and turn to Aziraphale and Crowley.

"You're up," You concede. You have no idea who this is, but he called you "human," and compared you to a moth. Whoever this person is, they’re probably the one Anathema’s had you looking for. He doesn’t look like Jesus, but maybe he will know where Jesus is. Either way, Anathema doesn’t get things wrong. If her work brought you to this person, then he’s the person you need to talk to.

That being said, whoever this is, he's the Ineffable Husbands' department and not yours. Sometimes you just gotta tap out and let the celestials handle their own kind. Now, this doesn't mean that you're not going to sit back and watch. Oh no, you want to see how this plays out.

"Can I have some popcorn?" You stage-whisper to Crowley as you pass him.

"Piss off," Crowley stage-whispers back. Despite his complaint, you notice a tiny Michael-Sheen smile on Aziraphale's face, and you return to Anathema, who looks surprised and is holding two small cartons of popcorn. You gratefully take one and have a seat on a convenient bench that is located conveniently within earshot. This is gonna be good.

"Hello," Aziraphale begins as he approaches, "I'm Aziraphale."

"Right," Surfer Dude says with a roll of his eyes, "The Angel of the Eastern Gate. I'm so honoured."

"Here I thought manners were important to angels," Crowley replies, sidling up next to Aziraphale. Surfer-Dude-Who-Is-Apparently-An-Angel takes in Crowley and raises an eyebrow.

"And here I thought demons didn't make a habit of hanging off angels' arms," Surfer Dude scoffs in in return.

Crowley snarls.

"Yes, well, each of us seems to be an anomaly in our own right," Aziraphale says with an appeasing smile, "This is Crowley. Might we have the pleasure of knowing your name?"

"No."

"Ah, right. Well, that is to your own discretion I suppose."

"Rude is what it is," sneers Crowley.

"Regardless, we've come to this garden with the guidance of our friend here, hoping to find, well, Jesus as it happens."

Surfer-Dude-Angel-Person throws his head back and laughs outright.

"You're looking for who now? JESUS? HA! Bit of soul-searching for you, is it? Spiritual journey? Pilgrimage to the Holy Land? You're in the wrong place for that!" He keeps laughing.

I mean, you get the laughter. It definitely sounds weird to a third party. Crazy even. But if this guy is an angel, then shouldn't it sound perfectly reasonable?

"Oi," Crowley interrupts, clearly impatient, "We're trying to save the world here. And since angels don't normally take holiday time, I'd think helping us might be in your best interest."

"You think you can stop the Second Coming? Ha! There isn't another technicality that you can throw around this time. This one's it. Enjoy the giant snail statues while they last, because it won't be for much longer."

"You know an awful lot," You call from the bench, "And you like to talk. So just get to the part about Jesus so we can leave you to be miserable on your own." You popcorn is already almost finished, and you frown into your carton. If only you could do miracles. You'd refill it yourself.

Surfer-Dude-Angel-Person laughs again.

"Yeah, okay, I like this one," he says, nudging a thumb in your direction. He turns away from Crowley and Aziraphale and strides towards you. Suddenly your popcorn carton is full again, so you look up. Okay, maybe he's not so bad. He reaches out a hand to you.

"Call me Sardis, Little Moth."

After a moment of hesitation, you shake his hand. He turns back to Crowley and Aziraphale.

"I can see why you've adopted this one," he says, then turns his attention to Anathema, paying no mind to the garbled protests coming from Crowley. "And since we're doing introductions...?"

"Anathema Device," says Anathema with a nod. She would probably shake his hand, but between her equipment and her popcorn, her hands are full.

"Lovely to meet you, Miss Anathema," Sardis nods at her before finally looking back at Aziraphale and Crowley. "You won't find Jesus here. But meet me for drinks later and I'll tell you what you need to know to find him."

"You're unnecessarily cryptic, Sardis," You say with a raised eyebrow and a mouth full of popcorn. He laughs again.

"Well, Little Moth," his eyes have a sparkle in them now as he looks at you, "Gotta keep myself entertained somehow."

Sardis insists on giving you all a tour of the sculpture garden, but refuses to say anything more about Jesus, or how he knows about Armageddon, or why he isn't in Heaven, or anything else that you actually WANT to talk about. He insists that such talk isn't for a quiet garden full of art. It isn't until he lays a cryptic finger beside his nose and winks at you that something clicks in your memory.

Remember, back before JK Rowling turned out to be an awful person, back when everyone read Harry Potter? EVERYONE, RIGHT?? Perhaps, dear Reader, you remember the chapter in book 5 where Hermione calls a meeting at The Hog's Head because it’s less crowded. Hermione figures the sparse crowd means that there are fewer people to see them together. Perhaps you also remember when, later in the book, this action comes back to bite them, and they are told very sternly that they should have met at the Three Broomsticks precisely BECAUSE it was busier. A busy pub meant they would have been less likely to be overheard.

Suddenly you look around the garden and notice the sparse, but very much there, collection of people. Just the right number of people that could listen to your conversation if they wanted to without you being any the wiser. Oh.

Oh.

Maybe the cryptic is a little bit necessary after all. He’s still overdoing it in your opinion, but whatever floats his goat.

You part ways after his tour, agreeing to meet at a local bar at 9pm. There’s enough time to go back to the hotel, freshen up, and get something to eat before you make your way there.

“Well,” Aziraphale says back at the hotel, “This Sardis certainly is a character.”

“I know the name from somewhere,” You trail off in thought. Where have you heard it before? Sardis…Tardis…Sardine….You’re not sure, but it rings a bell.

Anathema is already flipping through notebooks. Aziraphale has picked up his copy of the Bible, and Crowley is on his phone. You figure everyone else has it covered, and sure enough, it’s Crowley who finds it first. Google, no doubt.

“Ha! Found the sod! He’s in Revelation.”

“Oh!” You practically jump as recognition finally hits. “He’s one of the seven angels! The ones we didn’t think were here!”

“You didn’t think any of them were here?” Anathema asks, “Did you even check, or did you just assume?”

“Well Muriel said…” You go quiet, before clearing your throat and trying again. “We didn’t look into it far at all, no.”

“So exactly what work did you do before you called me?”

“Umm…….” You say.

“Nnngggh” Crowley adds.

“A great deal less than we thought at the time, apparently,” Aziraphale finally admits with a sigh.

“You are all really bad at saving the world.” Anathema shakes her head.

❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ 🖤

Beginning || Previous || Next

[flagellant]

Putting this on anon, because I'm pretty sure this is an opinion that might upset people, but it's still relevant to the discussion you're currently having/stuck in.

I, personally, don't believe you CAN appropriate Japanese culture, for the same reason I don't believe you can appropriate American, British, Russian, or Chinese (Beijin central official government) culture.

Because these are imperialist powers who have literally murdered and waged war to FORCE people to adopt their culture. I feel like once a group walks up, says "You will adopt this culture or WE WILL KILL YOU," everyone is allowed to do whatever the fuck they want with it.

Now, I love Japan, I love Japanese culture and artwork, and yes, anime, but I think that anyone who high on the bandwagon of "Oh, you can't do that, that's ApPrOpRiAtIoN of the Japanese culture, needs to read some fucking Japanese history. Ideally stuff written by the Japanese.

The people worried about appropriation of Japanese culture are the same ones who dog-piled on a designer for making a Kimono in an Clan Tartan (she was half Japanese, half Scottish) because they were CERTAIN she was a non-Japanese """Appropriating""" Japanese culture.

Also, I follow all the Japanese official government twitters, and about once every other week they just tweet out a whole slew of "Come join us at such and such, learn about traditional Japanese culture! Come participate in our festivals! We really, REALLY want everyone to come be part of our cultural heritage! We'll send you free books on the subject!"

Closing clarification. I absolutely believe that Cultural Appropriation is a real thing, it is a real problem. Especially when dealing with smaller cultural groups that have been suppressed in the past, one must tread with care and the utmost respect. I very specifically have worked to remove terms taken from certain cultures from my common usage and vocabulary because people from those cultures have asked. Spirit Animal, Golem, (The cannibal spirit repeated referenced in Hannibal), these are terms that have important cultural significance, and diluting and misusing them is wrong.

But, again, if a major historical factor in a culture is "We are literally going to murder you and your family if you DON'T adopt our culture," I think you lose pretty much all right to claim/complain about appropriation of your culture.

Okay so you do realize that the reason the Japanese official government twitter posts "Come learn about all these traditional cultural and historical things" is because they want people to learn about Japanese culture so that they DON'T continue appropriating it, yes?

All I'm going to tell you is you seriously need to remind yourself what, exactly, cultural appropriation is. It doesn't just mean feeling entitled to a closed culture's practices. It means the theft and misinterpretation of a culture due to a lack of knowledge and respect for that culture within its own context. Wearing a kimono as someone who isn't Japanese isn't appropriative. Dressing as a geisha for Halloween is appropriative. A foreigner seeking to become a geisha isn't appropriative; Memoirs of a Geisha is appropriative.

I am trying to say this in the most well-intentioned way I can, and I hope you understand it as such: The reason you think this opinion will upset people is because it's an opinion which literally any fucking East Asian person would see and go "What the actual living fuck is this bullshit." If you are as invested in respecting these cultures and in not perpetrating racist and dismissive attitudes towards its people as you claim, I would really suggest you need to do a better job and actually find fucking someone, anyone, who is East Asian, because the concept of "It's impossible to appropriate Japanese (and by extension of your definition Chinese) culture" is literally why the term cultural appropriation exists in the first place.

[i-sveikata]

You're so nice and patient with all the asks you get, could never be me lol I get annoyed so fast at the smallest things 😅

Are there any types of asks that you really don't like or you avoid answering? (for example, some authors don't want ANY constructive criticism but some welcome it, or some authors completely ban any asks about updates but others find it motivating to get them to write)

Oh god thank you but honestly I’m not perfect!!! Niceness and patience are things I still need to work at- it’s a skill you build up over time :) but if I feel like people are genuinely trying to reach out to me in some way or other then yeah I like to reach back!

I don’t really enjoy getting the same questions over and over again and if any asks come off to me as a bit too demanding or rude I generally take a bit longer to process how I feel first before responding back. I’m not generally avoiding question beyond putting up some boundaries around questions around fic updates (because I’m bad at being specific/ guesstimating timing for dates and they were the only questions I was getting- so it was less fun to answer when I’m just repeating myself) honestly if people are being sincere in their question I will generally answer it.

Tbh my thinking in regards to constructive criticism is that most people actually don’t generally understand what that really means.

which is why you get authors being inundated with rude comments that are generally about a readers personal preference, interpretation or the opinions they develop based off their own internal life experiences which affects how they react to a fic. Comments inspired by these factors aren’t constructive it’s just criticism. The whole point of writing fic is that it’s meant to be fun and encourage interactions between the fandom and create community. But obviously negative interactions like that don’t foster good feelings and discourage writers from writing/sharing fic in general because it takes the fun out of it- and often can seem a bit entitled and ungrateful for readers to hold authors to these kinds of arbitrary standards esp when we’re all fully aware fics are not rigorously edited published works the same way novels are (AND THEYRE BEING MADE AND SHARED FOR FREE!!). They can’t be held to the same standard (even if ppl have read fics that are of a quality better than some published works)

This is why I’d say most authors have a blanket rule against any construct crit- and tbh I’m pretty much in agreement with that. we’re all essentially strangers here talking online and can’t predict how people might react or interpret the meaning of what you’re trying to say. it leaves too much room for bad interactions and unnecessary drama when this is supposed to be fun for everyone. It’s not about one person reading a fic and having a bad time and then deciding they want to make someone else feel the same way too. That’s not the fandom experience anybody wants.

So I don’t really think fics are there for the purpose of readers to offer their crit on especially not in the comments of the fic which are a response to the author- not a group chat for fans to discuss the fic where the author can also read it. Like obvs it’s fine to do that too so long as you’re aware that this is posting to the author and they can see everything you say there.

There are other places for you to talk about things you didn’t enjoy in a story- I myself often vent to friends but never on a public platform or with references to any fic details or author names that could potentially mean it gets back to the author. Because when and if I am complaining I’m not directing it at the author. There are of course exceptions to this (particularly if an author has missed obvious tags on a story and the reader wants to request it be updated)

Honestly all of this is just basic etiquette tbh fic authors are not published professionally (at least not always) they are not celebrities or public figures who go into social media platforms with the expectation of being recognised or talked about or potentially harassed etc. fandom isn’t meant to be that kind of community. It’s collaborative between author and readers, so if readers want that to keep going that means encouraging authors and being kind and encouraging them to write and share and improve. And that kind of thing is achieved through positive feedback- it won’t work on the negative.

So fic doesn’t really have the room for constructive crit (unless that author has specifically requested that because they’re looking to improve their skills)

So like yes for me the kinds of things I’d like to hear about in that regard are generally if there’s a typo/spelling mistake or if I’ve made a real life reference to something that was factually incorrect or I got my research wrong. Because these are easy to correct.

Anything else just becomes reader opinion really (which is fine of course but if it’s a negative one then that’s when the don’t comment/ click out approach applies). The easiest way to find out what the author prefers is to read their notes at start of the fic or if you follow them on social media platforms to just ask- which is what you’ve done here and is honestly the safest method. Even if I think the general accepted stance on fic is not to crit.

[taekooktimeline]

April 25, 2023

On April 25, 2022 - Hours after the movie premier, Jk goes live! In my opinion, he came online to read our thoughts and assurances after such a loud, momentous occasion with Tae, especially considering he was silent and primarily seemed to be reading comments for the first seven minutes of his live. He also mentions later in the live he comes on live when he has a lot on his mind. It makes it all the more disappointing how some reacted and what they possibly could’ve commented for Jk to say he wouldn’t read comments. Please remember boundaries as a fan. Use empathy, respect, understanding, kindness and consideration - all of which isn’t hard to do. Be a fan that supports, rather than a “fan” that acts entitled and tries to dictate their lives (like telling him to cut his hair - how shameful of whoever said that) which is no fan. I like to hope and think that Tae and Jk saw more love and support than anything else, factoring in things like Taekook trending worldwide. They’re very much aware of the unfortunate hate from past occasions, yet they continue to prioritize each other, and they always will, so I wish some would take note of this and stop projecting their anger and fear onto them. Nothing will change. Understand that and respect it or be quiet, if you don’t have anything nice to say.

Anyway, getting into his live: 

A little over fifteen minutes in, Jk comments he hasn’t said much but there still is a lot of comments coming through. He gently suggests fans take a break from commenting. He then says to not leave messages, that he came because he missed us and then notes that the temperature of the questions differs. At 22:22 he says with a smile he won’t read comments and he wants to just turn the comments off, as the color of the comments is so different. He then says no matter his mood, happy or uncertain, he’ll seek us out. 

timestamp 23:52

Summary - 

He played the song “I really want to stay at your house” by Rosa Walton and Hallie Coggins on repeat for well over the first 24 minutes of his live. There surely is a reason he played the song on repeat, at least, in my opinion. One person noted it’s an OST for an open world RPG with main character “V.” I also read it’s a very gender neutral game. I won’t even try to deduce the meaning behind Jk playing the song on repeat so please decide as you like, though I’ll leave the RPG info below since it was circulating on SM.

Jk was surprised when, after 24 minutes of the song playing on loop, his player moved to another song.

Timestamp 24:38

Jk mentions now and in the future to not be sick. He then says he’ll also seek out his own personal journey of happiness, as he has until now and will continue to do so. He then reminds us we should too (find our own pursuit of happiness, which will differ for everyone).

Timestamp 25:38

This reminds me of his final live of the four lives he did on March 14, 2023, when he repeatedly and emotionally stressed to be happy, even without BTS (and then asked ARMY to type APOBANGPO).

Back to this live - he mentions again to not be sick. He wishes for our good health, physically and mentally. He says even without reading comments he feels peace because we’re connected right now (through his live). He also turns off the star projector.

Summary -

He then talks about the movie “Dream,” which goes without saying is the momentous event he and Tae attended hours ago. He says he enjoyed it.

He encourages us to focus on the plot of “Dream” as it’s about everyone having individual stories. This ties back into his comment about everyone finding their own definition of happiness - which we all should very much do since it differs for each individual - and working towards our individualized path towards that happiness.  

He says the movie was therapeutic, emotional and fun, and that he enjoyed it, despite not sleeping well the past couple of days (he also mentioned not sleeping well in his March 23, 2023 live). He ends his thoughts on the movie by asking us to give it a lot of love when it releases. He also says it was filmed a while ago, overlapping with Covid, but it’s still meaningful.

Timestamp of start of “Dream” -31:15 - 32:01

Summary -

He says he’s been working hard on music (can’t wait for JJK1!!!! 🙏🏽) and mentions ordering takeout lately. Jk comments he likes the perilla oil in makguksu.

A cute summary of the recipe of what Jk makes in his live - (by Taekook_Rainbow (IG) )

timestamp 35:45 

And this the comment is interesting in itself since we know Tae really loves makguksu. He mentioned eating it for lunch on Weverse, February 7, 2022. 

Tae mentioned makguksu to Wooga during filming of ITS Friendcation. 

https://twitter.com/thv2023/status/1550471881861767168?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://www.instagram.com/p/Crc7K1rNdxz/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Tae and Wooga ate at a makguksu restaurant during filming of ITS Friendcation.  

Seo-Joon mentioned in “Jinny’s Kitchen” Tae is eating a lot of makguksu -

and Jk mentioned it in his March 23, 2023 live.  

Timestamp 11:40 https://twitter.com/cookiesandtea26/status/1650666730593693700?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/heaven_borahae/status/1650816921703694336?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Jk posted the recipe on Weverse. A lot noted he mentions doubling the recipe. Since Seo-Joon recently said Tae likes makguksu, it seems awfully coincidental Jk posted this 2 portion recipe, but someone could also argue Jk has a hearty appetite, so I’ll just leave the information and you decide as you like 😀

[zhouxiangs]

(2/2)

And the clearest example is how he’s aware of Way’s feelings for him, has been for a while, but not only is he very dismissive of them (picture their hallway conversation when Way is clearly emotional and upset and for the first time actually addresses the elephant in the room (which takes a lot of courage), only for Babe to be all ‘yeah I know – ugh did you have to actually say it out loud?? - but, like���Charlie! Now let me caress your shoulder while I reassure you we’re still best buds!’ or the way he reacts like it’s all a bit tiresome whenever someone else brings it up) - Babe makes a conscious choice to NOT discuss it with Way, and more importantly to NOT draw any boundaries tween them. At best he’s just being extremely careless with Way’s feelings, especially when he jokes about them being bfs, but at worst, one could argue that his flirtatiousness is in fact an intentional manipulation of said feelings in order to keep Way where he wants him, which is at his beck and call. Babe doesn’t care to look any deeper because there’s nothing in it for him – as long as he has Way by his side, adoring him, he’s satisfied. Any awkward niggling thoughts about how actually this probably isn’t a healthy dynamic and this guy needs to get a life outside of me and in retrospect it’s a little strange that I know literally nothing about him get pushed aside in order to maintain that status quo.

Now, unlike half the characters in this show, I’m capable of self-reflection: I know that I could extend some of the sympathy I have for Way due to his shitty past (and present) to Babe, and speculate that Babe’s selfishness, his need to keep Way with him even if it’s detrimental to Way’s wellbeing, is merely a consequence of his own shitty past, his fear of being alone; that his inability to deal with this situation is a result of his own emotional maladjustment at Tony’s hands. That’s all very likely to be true. BUT! Babe has the whole internet ready to kill for him, so sorry but he doesn’t need me to do the same! What can I say - I feel obligated to stick up for the underdog, no matter how much of a fucked up wrong’un said underdog might be! (Of course there’s also the entirely plausible possibility that all this is just the fault of shoddy writing - as long as characters keep repeating that this really is a deep and wholesome and 100% reciprocated friendship then we the audience are duty-bound to believe it!)

In conclusion (if you got this far - apologies!): Way is a pathetic but tragic character who didn’t deserve the hand he was dealt (but does deserve lifelong therapy), whose motivations are much more complex and heart-wrenching than many seem able/willing to recognise/acknowledge. Babe is selfish and a shitty friend, but that is perhaps understandable given his experiences. SA (and mind-fucking your friend) is NEVER excusable, no matter how awful your life or how bad your daddy issues; neither is it EVER the fault of the victim. All of these things can be true at the same time, and it wouldn’t hurt to remember that.

Your Honour, I rest my case!

P. S. Internet, please don't be mad at me! Everyone's of course entitled to their own opinion (variety is the spice of life and all that!) and the remaining eps might totally destroy this interpretation, but at the end of the day, it's just a show, and I'm just a socially anxious contrarian overthinker with a penchant for well-acted morally dubious pretty boys!

i think i tend to be more positive/look for the more favourable explanation and so my opinion on the hallway conversation (which: hurty) is that babe is extreeeemely unprepared to talk about feelings. which is funny because his friendship with way reads as very intense to me, and they’re pretty dramatic with their words too? but it’s clear babe has no experience in this area, both talking about it and feeling it, and it shows precisely in how careless he is with way’s feelings. and again, the jokes about being bfs babe i will hunt you down you cannot be this dense! please! but also i don’t think he would see anything unhealthy in how powerful way’s attachment to him is because i think, up until charlie showed up, they both acted like that with each other. (my poor way…)

don’t apologise! this has taken me five million hours to reply to but it has been worth every. second. and honestly while as i’ve just said i don’t totally agree with your interpretation of babe and his actions and feelings towards way i do think you make great points and can see why you’re interpreting something in a different way than i do. also i love to read what people are thinking. meta is my favourite thing in the world, so unless it’s something horrifying to me i am going to enjoy it lol

[gaslightgirlsummer]

i just saw a tiktok with people defending j*s verstappen in the comments, justifying his abuse with max winning the wdcs. now, i don’t care if you love max or hate max or anything in between. you’re entitled to your own opinion. but no matter where you stand, all of this is fucked up. now, i’m going to go on a little rant here with references to some personal experiences, cw for references to child abuse, so don’t read further if you don’t want to

between the media painting jos’ abuse as “tough love”, fans defending jos because max won the championship, and that part of the GQ interview where max is desperately trying to prove to the journalist that he was not abused, i’m so sick of shit like this. these excuses, this false narrative, this is why child abuse still gets a pass in sports and life in general, why children can’t come to terms with the fact that they were in fact abused. i’m so tired of justifying child abuse time and time again through the children’s success later in life, because the abuse allegedly made them tougher, more independent or more ambitious or whatever the hell the reasoning is. i don’t care. it’s never going to be justified i come from a family that had unhealthily high academic expectations for me my entire life and zero tolerance for not meeting them. only now am i starting to truly accept that i’ve been verbally and emotionally abused by my mother for most of my life, because only now i have the people around me to help and the language to be able to recognise and name signs of that abuse. i look at the situation with max and jos and i can see clear my situation in a mirror. my mother was, thankfully, never physically abusive, but when i see max mention things he struggled with and jos rolling his eyes, when i hear max trying to defend his actions because “it helped him build character”, when i see people saying jos’ behaviour was fine, actually, because thanks to him max has a wdc, it hurts. it hurts because there i see my mother rolling her eyes and ignoring me when i tell her i’m too ill and tired to go to school, i hear myself defending my mother saying i have a strong ethic now thanks to her, i see people saying that if it weren’t for how my mother raised me i wouldn’t be even half successful as i am now. things like this are why it took me so long to acknowledge what was going on. and it’s still not easy. and it’s not just me. it’s so invalidating and i can guarantee that hundreds, thousands of children and now-adults who have gone through abuse feel like this too. how people approach child abuse that has been made so public and so general-knowledge speaks volumes of how child abuse is approached in everyday life. and people need to fucking do better. everyone needs to do better, stop justifying child abuse, stop defending abusers, start creating environments where people can heal from their abuse and fee themselves of their abusers. i don’t ask for much. just to be decent people with some empathy, who care more about a person’s health than their success. i still struggle with doing that for myself, even on good days, but i try to do it for others. and if that means repeating all of this over and over again whenever i see jos verstappen’s face, i will. max deserves better than this, i deserve better than this. we all deserve better. 

[raven-moon33]

Hi, I commented on the latest update of your fic but I just wanted to repeat myself that "A Kidnapping By Any Other Means" has been an amazing and very compelling read. I love how you wrote the family and incorporated previous incarnations. I love the mystery and the various twists and turns you throw in. But, more importantly, I LOVE how you wrote Enid and Wednesday. Their interaction at the end of chapter two is going to stick with me for a long time. But I'm mainly writing this to say that I really hope you're doing okay after all the unwarranted shit you received after chapter 13. For people to berate you like that just because a story decision, one that was meant to be upsetting, upset them? That's fucking awful. Writing is a long and lengthy process and no one should tell you how to do it after you've spent so much of your time on it. This is all to say to keep up the great work and fuck anyone who tries to keep you down

Omg, thank you so much for this amazingly kind and sweet comment! I don't think I can express how much it means to me after some of the tumultuous emotions I've been feeling recently.

I'ma be real, a big part of the reason I'm so invested in writing this story is because writing it is helping me get through a really rough patch in my life at the moment.

Enjoying the writing process, coming up with my own headcanon lore, and just building a hopefully fun and engaging story has been awesome enough, but having so many people enjoy it and give it so much more love then I ever expected any of my writing to receive has legitimately brought me to tears (happy ones!) on several occasions, and is helping me get through the stuff I'm struggling with.

Some of those less-than-kind comments have admittedly been getting me down and have even started dampening my enthusiasm for the story.

I might've even considered not continuing it altogether, since adding another stressful thing to my plate right now (especially when that stress is coming from something that's thus far been a humongous source of support for me during this difficult time) would be very bad for my mental health, but having so many wonderful people like you loving and supporting and engaging with my story is making me determined to stick with it.

And, just to make it clear, the comments I'm talking about are NOT any that are angry with some of the characters and their choices, upset because of things that are supposed to be upsetting in the story, or ones that are calling for my blood in a loving way that makes it clear how much they're engaged in my story.

Outside of the purely loving and supportive comments I get, those are the comments I love to read, since it means people are engaging with the story in the ways I hoped they would, getting involved in a discourse about whether certain characters were right or wrong, how certain events made them feel and why, and how people are excited to see what's coming.

The comments I'm talking about are the few people who are criticizing me directly in frankly rude and hurtful ways. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, but if you don't like my story choices to the point where you no longer want to read my story, then just feel free to not read it. My feelings won't be bruised as long as you're not unnecessarily mean about it in an intentional comment that you never needed to make in the first place.

But anyways, I just want to thank you again, theenbynightingale; people like you are the ones helping me through a really hard time in my life, helping me grow more confident in my skills as a writer, and helping me keep my spirits up enough to continue writing this.

I appreciate you all so much and am sending all my love to you guys. I'm going to work hard to get chapters out as soon as I can so you have less time to wait before you get to see how this arc is resolved.

[acourtofthought]

LOL well I am a product of the Midwest, so it’s still a battle to let my tongue lash freely 😂💞

And I think another part of me just feels bad for these people 🥲 they’re allowed to like what they want and ship what they want, but this feral need to prove to everyone else that they & their ship are right or better than others is absurd. Dramione was never gonna be a thing, but people who like the ship have created so much art and stories and such and it’s all good. I don’t understand why E/riels can’t do the same…? There’s this need for them to spam our blogs, posts, tweets, etc and I think I pity people who can’t just curate their own experience while ignoring what clearly isn’t made for them…? They can’t just disagree and keep scrolling, they have to downvote or reblog with snarky comments etc etc etc.

I think we all know how much I hate the “true mates” theory, but I don’t go to e/riel pages or posts to pester them on why they’re wrong. I’ll talk about it with other Eluciens & Gwynriels, and when I see an Elucien or neutral post questioning our ship because of it, that’s when I engage & debunk. But these anons come to you with their beliefs and opinions as if they’re facts, and it’s like wow. They didn’t even pause to think of the other opinion, of what in the text could support what we ship or disprove their own. And if you’re curious about why we ship what we do, you’re of course welcome to ask and see what we’ve written. But it’s embarrassing to see them be rude, condescending, and arrogant to you (& others!) with their easily disproven theories and arguments. It’s a phenomenon in this fandom that I really don’t understand. It’s as if they’ve become so good at just repeating their theories again and again that people who aren’t as engaged or aren’t as avid readers will see that and think that they’re facts when they’re not. The “second choice” thing is so blatantly not a thing with SJM’s writing. The “dusk court” weapons and shadows are from being Starborn are a definitely less obvious as false, but if they’d bother to check the books or even search for ACOTAR/CC wiki, it’ll be disproven so quickly. So yeah, I get petty when people are petty first, but at the same time I’m like girl…you could’ve saved yourself the time & embarrassment if you’d bother to check yourself.

🧼💖

Oooh! Do people ever notice you as having an accent with where you're from?!

I don't even mind engaging with them to some extent because they view things a certain way and I have to stop and consider their perspective which sometimes help me view my ship in ways I hadn't previously considered. But it's just annoying when they make statements that are asinine. Things that apparently only Elain and Lucien aren't entitled to even though pretty much every single other SJM main character was.

It just feels very cruel, to not give them the same liberties or time to figure things out that we were accepting of for the other characters. And yeah, it's extremely annoying to answer their Ask only to have them come back with literally the exact same argument. Like, didn't I just answer this? I don't even think they care what I have to say, they just want to keep repeating their argument over and over.

[tera-vadai]

Romantic ships, canon or fanon, don't get in the way nor eliminate the friendships of a character (or, a character can be shipped with whoever you want and still have other friends) — A quick rant by a tired Shouto fan

I generally prefer to keep my opinions with myself and don't get involved in discourse, specially when it's about certain characters or ships —you know, the usual fandom-related stuff—, but oh my God, constantly finding complains and slander of a favorite character of mine while looking for positive and wholesome content is really tiring.

Of course everyone is entitled to have their own opinions and it's free to like or dislike any character for X reason, but this case in particular it's as if you like chocolate ice cream, and everyone around you complains and gives you a list of reasons why chocolate ice cream sucks and you should not like it, and instead should replace it with another flavor.

That is super rude, you know?

Ok, so getting on topic, in a story, a character is not —or should not be— limited to having ONLY two friends (one being the best friend and the other the romantic interest). A single character can have lots of friends (the more, the merrier, am I right?), and it's natural and completely normal that the way these relationships and interactions work in each of these friendships are going to be different.

Talking specifically about BNHA, Izuku CAN be friends with Iida, Ochako, Katsuki and Shouto at the same time (and in canon, he actually is friends with all of them, as well as with other characters). Also, not because he gets along with two of them means he cannot, or should not, do the same with the other two (when, again, I repeat, it's canon that they are all his friends).

Granted, the story hasn't done a great job at defining these friendships in a more detailed way (and as a consequence, some characters get constantly sidelined, specially in the movies), but that doesn't mean that you should go as far as to say that the friendship is inexistent. Not because the author has forgotten that two characters are friends (just saying that they are, but failing to show it), or has neglected said friendship (giving the impression that is only one-sided), you should too.

Also, remember that headcanons =/= canon content. You can headcanon whatever you want, but that doesn't erase canon facts (and that includes established friendships).

Lastly —and this goes for both sides of this discussion—, trying to justify a ship by claiming that a character must only be friends with a certain character/or a certain group of characters, and in the process, should not be friends with any other character (generally one from a rival ship) it's actually very toxic, and you only hate for the sake of hating. In real life you can be part of different circles of friends while having a partner (because if, out of jealousy, your partner starts to isolate you from your other friends, well, that's a very big red flag in your relationship).

Please people, you can like a character without having to discredit other to put your fave on a pedestal.

Let's try to spread positivity, not negativity.

[starstrucklucky]

The post text in case the link ever breaks.

The great Stop Fucking Him post

Mar. 4th, 2005 at 9:30 AM

Demure or something

This post won't be for everyone. If you're uncomfortable with hearty leftist political opinions, you might want to skip it. I've gone ahead and lj-cut it out of consideration for (a). people who'd rather pass on it and (b). people who are at work, and might prefer to skip repeated derivations of the word "fuck" in bold face type. That having been said, feel free to keep reading or move right along. I promise not to take it personally.

Edit: Yes, yes yes -- feel free to link

this wherever you like. I don't mind.

This is not about abortion.

If you read the article in its entirety, I think that much is obvious -- this is not about abortion. If this were about abortion -- specifically, about fewer abortions being performed -- then those interested in reducing that number would hop all over this bill. So I'll say it again, this is not about abortion.

This is about women having sex, and who gets to be in charge of that sex.

Well, really -- that's what it all comes down to, isn't it? At present, there is a movement in place to make sure that (to lift a phrase from Dan Savage) men have orgasms, and women have babies.

There are people in this world who very firmly believe that this is the natural order of things: men have orgasms, and women have babies. This is a sacred balance, whereby a man is made happy for two minutes and a woman spends the next nine months serving as host to a life-threatening parasite, then the next eighteen years held legally, morally, and fiscally responsible for the health and well-being of that parasite ... while the man is free to wander off or stick around at his leisure.

This is a balance that many, many people -- many of them in positions of power -- are willing to go to great lengths to enforce. Never mind that many (but not all) of these people are men, and are therefore unlikely to be held accountable for any parasite more complex than a tapeworm ... for some strange reason or reasons, these people want to make sure that it is very, very difficult for your average American woman to manage her reproductive system.

Most of the people who object to the wide, easy availability of birth control are men. These men have the luxury of assuming this position because they have no reason to believe that they, personally, have anything at stake. I find this baffling.

The solution is so obvious that it can be boiled down to three words: stop fucking them.

That's right. Stop fucking them.

If your man doesn't understand that if he's entitled to an orgasm, you're entitled to an unoccupied uterus -- stop fucking him. If he can't get it through his thick skull that his fleeting pleasure poses a mortal threat to you -- stop fucking him. No handjobs, no blowjobs, no orgasms for him whatsoever except by his own hand, until you can be completely assured of a baby-free future, at your discretion.

These men do not deserve access to your pants. Stop fucking them.

I don't know what you think you owe them, and I don't care how badly they whine or beg. I don't care if they're wonderful boyfriends otherwise. I don't care if you're married to them. Stop fucking them. It is still your body. It is still your call. Clearly, they do not understand this. So stop fucking them.

They will not die if you do not fuck them. Stop fucking them.

Remember: You can hold out longer than they can. I promise. Your sex toys are better,* your self-control is superior, and your stakes are higher. Stop fucking them. You deserve better. You deserve someone who is aware that your body is your domain, and who respects that. If he doesn't respect that, stop fucking him.

Just stop. Stop it. You deserve better, and he deserves a cold shower if he thinks he is entitled to control over your vagina and how you manage its daily operation. Stop fucking him if he thinks that someone other than you should determine what hangs around inside you. Stop fucking him, because he would sooner masturbate with a corkscrew than let you dictate how he receives his prostate exams.

Stop fucking him if he refers to birth control as your problem, then helps vote in legislation that makes it your really big fucking problem. Stop fucking him if he thinks that your inability to prevent conception should in no way prevent him from having sex with you.

It's not that complicated.

Stop fucking him.

Stop it. Seriously.

Christ.

* And illegal in some states. Coincidence? I think not.

Attn: conservative men

[socheckitout-mikey]

Hello! Could you do headcannos of David from TLB with a S/O that it's super insecure about people leaving her?

heya, i've been sat on this one for awhile and i really am unsure how to answer this as i don’t really see this person melding well with david.

where i see david being somewhat understanding and patient in the beginning, i think his patience may run out if it’s a repeated issue; wearing him down or even irritating him at points when someone is repeatedly mistrusting his intentions. he’s very much in the present, wanting to have fun despite having traits like sarcasm and broodiness. the idea of him abandoning his s/o is laughable to him and the boys bc they’re already his! what more can he do to solidify that outside of what he’s already done?

i don’t see the relationship lasting unless his s/o was working on themselves to change said behaviours, thought patterns and so on. david is very much a: “lets get to the root of the issue and do something about it” kind of guy (where possible). he gets everyone has insecurities, but not when it’s the main focus of the relationship. he’s a creature of the night after all. he wants to have fun and not be held back by such things. he’s not a therapist either, its not his sort of shtick.

i believe david’s  a caring guy deep down. seeing his s/o insecure and afraid of abandonment breaks his heart. him and the boys are the loyalest bunch of vamps out there, despite their savage inhibitions! he can only prove it sm until a discussion will be brought up. expect honesty from him. the work must come from them, whilst he will do his part too. tho he's not privy to moving with change. stubborn is his middle name.

david himself most likely has issues pertaining to abandonment. seen through his undying loyalty to star and trying to bring michael into the bunch, even at the end. i think someone with these insecurities would clash with him. clinging does nothing short of pushing him away further. he’s akin to a scruffy yet sleek stray cat, free like a bat floating upon the winds at night. exuding qualities like: independence, self-sufficiency, etc. he needs that room to feel at peace and content with his afterlife (however blood, partying and never growing old can be such a thing).

in reality, he’s not going anywhere. if seeing him have fun with the boy's breeds insecurities it just reiterates the problem. he’s obviously capable of having bonds, even romantic ones. however, i feel that he’d be better in a friendship with this person, where the boys also help reassure them they’re never going to know abandonment or pain again. through that a romantic bond may occur once there’s been understanding on the reader's part that this is the truth that matters. none of them will grow sick, old or die! isn’t that beautiful?

then his devotion will shine through, which on a romantic basis is amplified by a thousand!

i’m aware that my interpretation of this may be harsh or discouraging, but it is as it stands. david isn’t the type to desert those he cares for so rest easy in that notion. everyone is entitled to their own opinions. in fact, i welcome differences and discussions! if he’s your comfort character, helping you get through something then i understand and am happy for you. we all have insecurities, deserving love and respect unconditionally. sorry this didn’t turn out the way you probably hoped. - mae

[thefirstknife]

The reason SBMM has "failed" in the past is that while objectively it is beneficial to the vast majority of players, ALL the PvP content creators are packed in the top 20-30% of the pool (probably even less than that). These players have a sense of entitlement in that because of the shear amount of time they put into the playlist, its design should cater to their needs. "I'm the one who plays this the most, therefore my voice matters" yeah, because democracy is most effective when the only people who get to vote are those who spend ALL their free time watching political speeches, right? The fact is that D2 PvP is at its best when people give zero fucks and use dumb shit like Khepri's Horn + Wave Frame GL, NOT when the exact same loadout is used over and over again like a goddamn copypasta. It infuriates me when creators complain about facing sweaty players when its like. MOTHERFUCKER that is your default playstyle even when CBMM was a thing don't act like you were a super casual dude in 6v6 you always played that shit like it was Trials. And the thing is that their fans are gonna start thinking that SBMM is bad even if it makes their experience objectively better, because they just repeat what their favorite content creator says without forming their own opinion.

Yeah pretty much this. It also doesn't only affect Destiny either. This mentality is pervasive throughout gaming. People who play video games for a living trying to assert that their enjoyment is the only thing that matters. That just doesn't make a single sense: Bungie, and any other company, wants to make money. They make money if people play the game. They want more people to play the game. The game has to be accessible for the lowest common denominator. It's literally that simple.

Also same, I am very confused about these people not wanting to "play sweaty" in every match because:

They are self-titled pvp pros. I though competition is the point? How are you proving you're a pro if you're stomping blue gear baby lights?

They play sweaty anyway? I don't see them doing anything other than meta, ever. I'm not exactly seeing these pros screwing around with meme loadouts in their games. I don't see them being last on the leaderboard. I don't see them being playful with others.

Matches are "sweaty" for normal players ALL THE TIME. When these pros talk about "sweaty" matches, they don't seem to understand that the rest of us do not have the luxury to stop sweating in pvp. Every match I get put into requires me to sweat my hardest so I can finish my bounties so I can get my pinnacle. They are so used to matches not being sweaty because their opponents have 0.6 kd. Meanwhile, my opponents are either on my skill level or above. Very rarely do I get a match with people below my skill level. And when I do, I just mow them down and mercy them and wow, it wasn't a sweaty match. And that sucks. If I want to mow down enemies, I'll play a strike.

Not even getting into the big chunk of people who have disabilities. To them, every match was not just sweaty, it was impossible. I genuinely do not care about 0.1% of the players who are pros and how difficult pvp is for them. It's equally difficult for them now as it is difficult for average players ALL THE TIME. And arguably, a new player or an average player or someone with disabilities will always have it harder than some content creator whose job is to play video games. I am sorry, but I have no sympathy for the 1% crying, pissing and shitting about how pvp will be hard now. As the gamers says: git gud.

I hope so too. I hope they keep improving the system and that pvp ends up being enjoyable to everyone. I probably sounds like a huge pvp hater, but I actually enjoy pvp and competitive games. The problem is that I have no drive to participate if the odds are stacked against me before I even load in and if those odds cannot be improved by me.

Pvp is otherwise an enjoyable passtime for me. Especially when made accessible: being able to solo in Trials and to have Freelance weeks has been incredibly fun for me. I actively enjoy Freelance Trials. I also actively enjoyed Iron Banner with Rift mode as soon as I got done with the annoying triumphs (got Iron Lord in one week!). I really hope that these changes (or some version of them) become a standard for other modes (Trials desperately needs a fix on matchmaking, too many times I am on 1st win on my card and I get enemies who are on their win for the Lighthouse).

Yep! They added a test run of it this season, to Control. They're monitoring statistics and overall reception and will prolong the testing for now. It's only in Control currently, but depending on how it goes, it may be spread to other modes as well. From the initial reports, it seems to be well-received by like, normal people. There's always a room for improvement of course, the system isn't fully done so there will probably still be hiccups and issues. Hopefully it smooths out in time.

[pumpkinpaix]

mdzs fandom, diaspora, and cultural exchange

Hey everyone. This post contains a statement that’s been posted to my twitter, but was a collaborative effort between several diaspora fans over the last few weeks. Some of the specifics are part of a twitter-localized discourse, but the general sentiments and issues raised are applicable across the board, including here on tumblr.

If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ve probably seen a few of my posts about this fandom, cultural exchange, and diasporic identity. For example, here, here, and here. This statement more directly criticizes some of the general issues I and others have raised in the past, and also hopefully provides a little more insight into where those issues come from. I would be happy if people took the time to read and reblog this, as the thought that went into it is not trivial, and neither is the subject matter. Thank you.

Introduction

Hello. I'm a member of a Chinese diaspora discord server - I volunteered to try and compile a thread of some thoughts regarding our place and roles in the fandom expressed in some of our recent discussions. This was primarily drafted by me and reviewed/edited by others with the hopes that we can share a cohesive statement on our honest feelings instead of repeatedly sharing multiple, fragmented versions of similar threads in isolation.

This was compiled by one group of diaspora and cannot be taken to represent diaspora as a whole, but we hope that our input can be considered with compassion and understanding of such.

For context, we are referencing two connected instances: the conflict described in these two threads (here and here), and when @/jelenedra tweeted about giving Jewish practices to the Lans. Regarding the latter, we felt that it tread into the territory of cultural erasure, and that it came from a person who had already disrespected diaspora’s work and input.

Context

The Lans have their own religious and cultural practices, rooted both in the cultural history of China and the genre of xianxia. Superimposing a different religious practice onto the Lans amidst other researched, canonical or culturally accurate details felt as if something important of ours was being overwritten for another’s personal satisfaction. Because canon is so intrinsically tied to real cultural, historical, and religious practices, replacing those practices in a canon setting fic feels like erasure. While MDZS is a fantasy novel, the religious practices contained therein are not. This was uncomfortable for many of us, and we wanted to point it out and have it resolved amicably. We were hoping for a discussion or exchange as there are many parallels and points of relation between Chinese and Jewish cultures, but that did not turn out quite as expected.

What happened next felt like a long game of outrage telephone that resulted in a confusion of issues that deflected responsibility, distracted from the origin of the conflict, and swept our concern under the rug.

Specifically, we are concerned about how these two incidents are part of what we feel is a repeated, widespread pattern of the devaluing of Chinese fans’ work and concerns within this fandom. This recent round of discourse is just one of many instances where we have found ourselves in a position of feeling spoken over within a space that is nominally ours. Regardless of what the telephone game was actually about, the way it played out revealed something about how issues are prioritized.

Background

MDZS is one of the first and largest franchises of cmedia that has become popular and easily accessible outside of China. Moreover, it’s a piece of queer Chinese media that is easily accessible to those of us overseas. For many non-Chinese fans, this is the first piece of cmedia they have connected with, and it’s serving as their introduction to a culture previously opaque to them. What perhaps is less obvious is that for many Chinese diaspora fans, this is also the first piece of cmedia THEY have connected with, found community with, seen themselves in.

Many, many of us have a fraught relationship with our heritage, our language—we often suffer from a sense of alienation, both from our families and from our surrounding peers. For our families, our command of the language and culture is often considered superficial, clunky, childish. Often, connecting with our culture is framed as a mandatory academic duty, and such an approach often fosters resentment towards our own heritage. For our non-Chinese peers, our culture is seen as exotic and strange and other, something shiny and interesting to observe, while we, trapped in the middle, find ourselves uprooted and adrift.

MDZS holds an incredibly important place in many diaspora’s hearts. Speaking for myself, this is literally the first time in my life I have felt motivated and excited about my own native tongue. It's the first time I have felt genuine hope that I might one day be able to speak and read it without fear and self-doubt. It is also the first time that so many people have expressed interest in learning from me, in hearing my thoughts and opinions about my culture.

This past year and a half in fandom has been an incredible experience. I know that I am not alone in this. So many diaspora I have spoken to just in the last week have expressed similar sentiments about the place MDZS holds in their lives. It is a precious thing to us, both because we love the story itself, and because it represents a lifeline to a heritage that’s never felt fully ours to grasp.

It’s wonderful to feel like we are able to welcome our friends into our home and show them all these things that have been so formative to our identities, and to be received with such enthusiasm and interest. Introducing this to non-Chinese friends and fans has also been an opportunity to bridge gaps and be humanized in a way that has been especially important in a year where yellow peril fear mongering has been at an all-time high.  

History

However, MDZS’ rise in popularity among non-Chinese audiences has also come with certain difficulties. It is natural to want to take a story you love and make it your own: that’s what transformative fandom is all about. It is also natural that misunderstandings and unintentional missteps might happen when you aren’t familiar with the ins and outs of the culture and political history of the story in question. This is understandable and forgivable—perfection is impossible, even for ourselves.

We hope for consideration and respect when we give our knowledge freely and when we raise the issue of our own discomfort with certain statements or actions regarding our culture. Please remember that what is an isolated incident to you might be a pattern of growing microaggressions to us. In non-Asian spaces, Asian diaspora are often lumped together under one umbrella. In the west, a lot of Chinese diaspora attach themselves to Korean and Japanese media in order to feel some semblance of connection to a media which approximates our cultures because there are cultural similarities. This is the first time we've collectively found community around something that is actually ours, so the specificities matter.

There is a bitterness about being Asian diaspora and a misery in having to put up a united front about racial issues. Enmity towards one group becomes a danger to all of us, all while our own conflicted histories with one another continue to pass trauma down through the generations. Many of us don’t even watch anime in front of our grandparents because of that lingering cultural antipathy. When the distinctions between our cultures are muddled, it feels once again like that very fraught history is flattened and forgotten.

Without the lived experience of it, it’s hard to understand how pervasive the contradictory web of anti-Asian and, more specifically, anti-Chinese racial aggressions are and how insidious its effects are. The conflation of China the political entity (as perceived and presented by the US and Europe) with its people, culture, and diaspora results in an exhausting litany of criticism levied like a bludgeon, often by people who don’t understand the complicated nature of a situation against those of us who do.

There is often a frankly stunning lack of self-awareness re: cultural biases and blind spots when it comes to discussions of MDZS, particularly moral ones. There are countless righteous claims and hot takes on certain aspects of the story, its author, and the characters that are so clearly rooted in a Euroamerican political and moral framework that does not reflect Chinese cultural realities and experiences. Some of these takes have become so widespread they are essentially accepted as fanon.

This is a pattern of behavior within the fandom. It is not limited to any specific group, nor does it even exclude ourselves—we are, after all, not a monolith, and we should not be placed on pedestals to have our differing opinions weaponized against one another in fandom squabbles. We are not flawless in our own understandings and approaches, and we would appreciate it if others would remember this before using any of us as ultimate authorities to settle a personal score.

It is difficult not to be disheartened when enthusiastic interest crosses the line into entitled demand and when transformative work crosses into erasure, especially when the reactions to our raised concerns have so frequently been dismissive and hostile. The overwhelming cultural and emotional labor we bring to the table is often taken advantage of and then criticized in bad faith. We are bombarded with racist aggressions, micro and macro, and then met with ridicule and annoyance when we push back. Worse, we sometimes face accusations of hostility that force us to apologize, back down, and let the matter go.

When we bring up our issues, it usually seems to come with the expectation that there are other issues that should be addressed before we can address ours. It feels like it’s never really the time to talk about Asian issues.

On the internet and in fandom spaces, Western-coded media, politics and perspectives are assumed to be general knowledge and experience that everyone knows and has. It feels like a double standard that we are expected to know the ins and outs of western politics and to engage on these terms, but most non-Chinese have not even the slightest grasp of the sort of politics that are at play within our communities. We end up feeling used for our specialized knowledge and cultural background and then dismissed when our opinions and problems are inconvenient.

As the culture represented in MDZS is not a culture that most non-Chinese fans are familiar with, we’d like to remind you that you do not get to decide which parts of it are or are not important. While sharing this space with Chinese diaspora who have a close connection to the work and the painful history that goes along with being diaspora, we ask that you be mindful of listening to our concerns.

Cultural erasure is tied to a lot of intense historical and generational trauma for us that maybe isn't immediately evident: the horrors of the Pacific theatre, the far-reaching consequences of colonization, racial tensions both among ourselves and with non-Chinese etc. These are not minor or simple things, and when we talk about our issues within fandom, this is often what underlies them. This is one of the first and only places many of us have been able to find community to discuss our unique issues without feeling as if we’re speaking out of turn.

With the HK protests, COVID, the anti-Chinese platforms of the US election etc., anti-Chinese sentiment has been at the forefront of the global news cycle for some time now, and it is with complete sincerity that we emphasize once again how important MDZS fandom has been as a haven for humanizing and valuing Chinese people through cultural exchange.

Experiencing racial aggression within that space stings, not just because it’s a space we love, but because it feels like we’ve been swimming in rapidly rising racial aggression for over a year at this point.

Feelings

This is a difficult topic to broach at the best of times, and these are not the best of times. Many of us have a wariness of rocking the boat instilled in us from our upbringings, and it is not uncommon for us to feel like we should be grateful that people want to engage with something of ours at all. When we do decide to speak up, we’ve learned that there is a not insignificant chance that we’ll be turned on and trampled over because what we’ve said is inconvenient or uncomfortable. When it is already so difficult to speak up, we end up second-guessing and gaslighting ourselves into wondering whether there really was a problem at all.

We’d like to be able to share what we know about our culture and have our knowledge and experience be taken seriously and treated with courtesy. This is a beautiful, rich world built with the history of our ancestors, one that we too are trying to connect with. When we find it in ourselves to speak up about it, we would appreciate being met with consideration instead of hostility.

We don't have the luxury of stepping away from our culture when we get tired of it. We don't get to put it down and walk away when it’s difficult. But if you're not Chinese or Chinese diaspora, you get to put this book down—we'd like to kindly request that you put it down gently because of how much it matters to all of us in this fandom, regardless of heritage.

What we are asking for is reflection and thoughtfulness as we continue to engage with this work and with one another, especially with regards to how Chinese issues are positioned. When we raise issues of our own discomfort, please take a moment to reflect before reacting defensively or trying to shut us down for spoiling the fun—don’t deprioritize our concerns, especially in a fandom for a piece of Chinese media. We promise most of us are not trying to start shit for the sake of a fight. Most of the time, all we want is acknowledgement and a genuine attempt at understanding.

Our hope with this statement is to encourage more openness and understanding between diaspora and non-Chinese fans while we navigate this place that we’re sharing. Please remember that for many of us, MDZS is far more intense than a typical fandom experience. Remember that the knowledge we have and research we do is freely and happily given, and that it costs us both materially and emotionally. Please don’t take that for granted. Remember too that sometimes the reason for our discomfort may not be immediately evident to you: what seems culturally neutral and harmless might touch upon specific loaded issues for us. We ask for patience, and we ask for sincerity as we try to communicate with one another.

We are writing this because there’s a collective sense of imposed silence—that every time the newest round of discourse crops up, we often feel as if we’re walking away having created no meaningful change, and nursing new wounds that we’ll never get to address. But without speaking up about it, this is a cycle that will keep repeating.

This is not meant to shame or guilt the fandom into throwing themselves at our feet, either to thank us or beg for forgiveness—far from that. We’re just your friends and your fellow fans. We are happy to have you here, and we’re happy to create and share and play together. We just ask to be respected and heard.

Thank you. Thank you for listening. Several of us will be stepping back from twitter for a while. We’ll see you when we get back. ❤️

* A final addendum: here are two articles with solid practical advice on writing stories regarding a culture other than your own.

Cultural Appropriation for the Worried Writer: Some Practical Advice

Cultural Appropriation: Some More Practical Advice

The thread on twitter is linked in the source of this post. Thanks everyone.