#so i don’t think i have the commitment of a full-on goth

[pichiru]

The Sun Also Smiles - Chapter 1

Chapters - [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]

Summary - With Mabel and Dipper's 16th birthday party on the horizon, Grunkle Stan takes to online dating to find a date for the party. Things start to get real weird real fast.

Word Count - 1,782

Pairing(s) - Stan Pines x OC

Genre(s): Romance, Comedy, Mystery

A/N: Hi everyone! This is the first fanfic I've written in about 10 years! This is my first time posting my writing on Tumblr and I'm very, very nervous. The Grunkle Stan curse has consumed me whole… I'm not sure at the moment exactly how long this fic will be but it'll be a fun ride for us all! :3 I really hope you enjoy! Please feel free to leave feedback about how you feel about the story! I looooooove reading what everyone has to say and how you feel about stuff! It makes me so happy :D

~~~~~~~

“So…”

“Uh huh…”

“What you’re saying is…”

“Uhhhh huuuhhhh.” There was smiling, almost downright giggling, in her voice.

“You…”

“Uh huh!”

“Wanna…”

“EEEEEE!!!” She screeched quietly behind her prayer positioned hands while jumping in place.

“Start your own weird earring business?”

Mabel let out a loud ear piercing scream, causing Dipper to cover his ears quickly. Even at 15, almost 16, Mabel was still so excitable and bubbly. She never lost that part of her personality and she never would if she had anything to say about it.

“Mabel, is there even a market for that kind of thing?” Dipper asked his sister after she finally calmed down enough to have a conversation.

“Dipper…” Mabel started, her tone serious. “You have no frickin idea!” She squealed, jumping some more in place.

“Okay, say for instance I believe you and this is something you’re actually gonna commit to this time, how are you gonna get the materials?” He asked, folding his arms across his chest.

“Oh you know…” She said with a wide grin, nudging her brother in his ribs with her elbow. Dipper let out a groan, unfolding his arms to rub where she practically stabbed him.

“He’s not gonna go for it, Mabel. Him or Ford. Grunkle Ford would probably have war flashbacks if you even said the word ‘weird’ around him. Even if you whispered it,” Dipper said matter of factly.

“That’s what you think. You just don’t have the Mabel Pines charm. Or the puppy dog eyes. You’ve lost your edge. You’re too emo now,” Mabel sighed as she started reminiscing how cute and cuddly Dipper used to be. Now he’s just like Robbie. But somehow cooler? Somehow.

“Emo?! It’s called goth!” Dipper said, his voice cracking very slightly. His cheeks flushed, hoping Mabel wouldn’t notice. Her lack of reaction led him to believe she didn’t. But he figured she was just doing him a favor by not embarrassing him about it anymore. It got boring, he figured.

“Anyway,” Dipper started after clearing his throat a little. “I’d like to see you try to convince Stan to foot the bill for this. There’s no amount of 15 year old puppy dog face that’ll get him to do it.”

“Oh ye of little faith, my brother,” Mabel sighed, shaking her head as she started unpacking her luggage.

The twins begged and pleaded to stay with their grunkles for the summer. It was a big summer! Their 16th birthday. Ford and Stan agreed to return from their Stan o War II expeditions on the condition that they could plan a huge party for them before sending them back home. They thought it would be nice to do for the kids. Especially since they haven't really seen them since they turned 13. Dipper, however, has been keeping correspondence with Ford every week.

Mabel pulled a blazer out of her largest suitcase and held it up to Dipper with a wide, metal filled, grin. "I brought this just for the pitch! Hopefully it'll make Grunkle Stan take me seriously since all he does is wear a blazer in the shack. And dress pants. Come to think of it, he wears a full suit to work in a tourist trap," she said mostly to herself at the end.

"Did you get the blazer because you think it'll make you more grown up?" Dipper asked, rolling his eyes slightly.

"Uh, duh, Dipper. Why else would I just have a blazer laying around as a teenager?" Mabel asked, rolling her eyes back.

Dipper had his back turned to Mabel but he smiled at her comment. He loved that his sister was so sarcastic and funny. It was one of his favorite things about her.

After about 15 minutes passed, they were both unpacked and settled into their old room. Ford had even convinced Stan to get the kids their own full sized beds, instead of the smaller twin sized beds. He thought it would make them feel more comfortable. He wasn't wrong though.

Dipper trudged down the stairs first, wanting to be witness to this disaster of a business pitch his sister was about to initiate. He looked around for a moment. It was eerily quiet. The only thing that could be heard was the clicking of a keyboard from the kitchen and hushed arguing. They obviously didn't want to be heard but they sucked at it, frankly.

He sighed and flattened his fingers against his hips to stick them into his pockets. He took a step towards the kitchen before jumping at a loud yell that startled him from head to toe. Of course it was Grunkle Stan's voice. Dipper rushed into the kitchen to see what was going on.

"Grunkle Stan?!" Dipper yelled, his hands gripping the doorway in terror. "Are you okay?!"

Ford and Stan looked to their nephew, confused about why he was so startled. They were huddled around a laptop on the kitchen table. Stan was sitting in front of the computer and Ford standing but leaned down to read what was on the screen.

"Are you okay, kid?" Stan asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

Dipper slowed his breathing to a normal pace before laughing it off. "Y-Yeah. I'm A-OK! I just..." He trailed off.

"Dipper, it's alright," Ford said as he walked up to his nephew and placed a solid hand on his shoulder. "We're just..." He looked back at his brother, who shook his head slowly, his mouth a hard line and his eyebrows flat. Ford turned his attention back to Dipper.

"Stan's trying online dating. He says he wants to have a date to your birthday party. I don't care about that sort of thing personally but..."

"SIXER!" Stan blurted as he started blushing furiously, hunching over the computer. "Always openin your mouth..." he grumbled to himself, knowing full well they both could hear him. "I just wanted to make a FRIEND that's not my brother, you kids, or Soos. Can't an old coot want that for himself?"

Ford and Dipper looked at each other with the same intrigued expression. Dipper straightened himself up and nodded.

"Yeah. You can definitely want that for yourself," he answered. "Have you...had any luck?" Dipper asked cautiously.

"Not really," Stan said curtly. He knew online dating at his age would be tedious but not _this_ bad.

"Actually, Dipper," Ford interjected. "Someone just messaged him back. Eagerly," he said, shooting a grin at Stan.

"Shut your trap! We don't even know if she's a real person," Stan grumbled as he typed on the laptop on front of them. "Or if she's a...what is it? Dogwhale?"

"Catfish," Ford and Dipper corrected in unison.

Stan looked at his brother and nephew, squinting his eyes at them. "Sometimes I wonder who's Sixer's twin here. Me or you, kid. Aside from the fact you look like The Cure meets Marilyn Manson these days." He turned back to the computer and continued typing.

"How do you know who Marilyn Manson is?" Dipper asked with much confusion in his voice.

"Don't worry about it, kid," Stan dismissed. "It's a good look on you."

Dipper blushed and rubbed the back of his neck shyly. "Oh! Thanks," he said quietly, looking around the room nervously. "It's a new thing."

"Some of the smartest people I knew in college were goths," Ford added. "Keep up the good work...er...look...Yeah." Ford looked between the other two and left the room quickly out of embarrassment.

"GRRUUNNKKKLLLEEE STAANNNNNN!!!" Mabel squealed as she rushed past Dipper into the kitchen with her blazer on haphazardly. She very obviously didn't know how to put it on to fit her correctly but that didn't stop her from trying.

Stan turned to look at Mabel who was standing there eagerly with a book under her right arm. He couldn't help but smile at his niece still being the same silly person she always has been. It always warmed every corner of his heart. Even though he'd never admit it.

"What's up, kid?" He asked as he leaned back in the chair and crossed his left ankle over his right knee.

ding!

"So! I have a proposition for you!" Mabel said as she pulled her book out and opened it.

ding!

ding!

ding!

"What is that?" Mabel asked curiously as she stepped forward towards Stan and the laptop.

"Nothing!!" Stan said as he slammed the laptop closed.

"Stan's doing online dating," Dipper said without thinking. He made a small noise then covered his mouth quickly.

There was an unsettling silence at first followed by a loud shriek of excitement followed by Mabel jumping up and down with the book still in her hands. "GRUNKLE STAN NO WAY! NOOOOO WAAAAYYY!! AH, I'M SO EXCITED FOR YOU!"

Stan and Dipper both covered their ears.

"Alright, alright, kid. That's enough. It's no big deal."

"IT IS SO A BIG DEAL!!! Have you met anyone yet? Did you ask anyone on a date?" Mabel asked rapidly.

"No and no," Stan said simply.

Mabel's entire disposition changed when he answered. "Oh... Well those dings from the computer sound promising! There was a lot of them too. Maybe it's multiple women trying to get your attention?"

"No. It's...It's one woman. I just met her," Stan said as he opened the laptop back up and went to the woman's profile. "Says here she's an artist, she loves period pieces, and loves all things Halloween. Don't really get the last part but the first two things? It makes her the dame of my dreams," he sighed with a smile. He quickly reigned himself back in and cleared his throat.

"Anyways, we're just...chattin right now. That's all. It probably won't even last a day. She's too good to be true. She's probably a...wazzit called, Dip?"

"Catfish," Dipper answered quickly.

"Yeah that. She's probably a catfish," Stan said sadly.

"Grunkle Stan," Mabel said softly as she walked over to him and sat her book down on the table. "I know you've led a hard life but you deserve happiness. So don't shoot it down before it's even had the chance to take flight," she advised wisely, placing her hand on his shoulder.

"Wise words, kid," Stan said, accepting her advice. "I'll...give it a chance."

"YAY!!" Mabel squealed as she clapped her hands happily.

Stan's gaze snapped to the book in front of them. "Wazzat?" he asked, pointing with his chin. "And why the hell are you wearing a blazer? And wearin it like...that?"

A huge grin slowly spread across Mabel's face, showing every single color in her braces, at Stan's sudden interest. "Grunkle Stan...do I have a proposition for you!"

[sidhewrites]

If I may, because I have no impulse control just a cozy bed and a heart full of love

Details of each WIP under the cut

I met a girl in the graveyard: kaz pine is a skeptic who doesn’t believe in ghosts, and meets a mysterious goth woman named Lucy in the graveyard where she works as a landscaper/general assistant. But as she and Lucy get closer, strange things start happening. It’s not ghosts though. Because obviously they don’t exist. A sapphic rom com with extremely light horror. Honestly it’s probably not even horror but it’s basically all I read right now so it feels weird not to call it that. Featuring an old cat named Renfield and Halloween vibes. ADHD lesbian MC, bisexual autistic love interest.

A Crown of Hoarfrost: A young woman is forced to be the bride of a wicked fairy king. She learns to survive at the cost of her humanity, and does not forget the horrors he’s committed, no mater how desperately he loves her. an angry reaponse to barious arranged/forced-marriage romantasy/hades-persephone retellings that got to me. Featuring lots of world building and catharsis on the part of the author.

Café Au Lait: a sapphic flower shop/coffee shop romance that turns into horror. Beth has just gotten out of prison after 15 years and an overturned sentence, and she’s struggling to suppress the intrusive violent thoughts in her head. Iris frequents the cafe where she works and doesn’t help quiet the thoughts in her head, but for a while provides a seemingly harmless outlet for her issues. A short story I have to actively sit down and develop but also itd probably be lots of fun

Silverlight: a cute sparkly adventure inspired by 1980s fanfasy. Polly is best friends with the fairy Jack and thinks he’s the most exciting thing in the world until a wounded elk reveals itself to be Sylvie, a fairy from the Day court who needs help getting home before the evil Night King snuffs out the sun. Light fantasy, mostly predectable plot twists. Meant to feel sparkly and fun. Featuring a bisexual MC, a trans love interest, a talking cat, and a requisite masquerade/ball.

Sun Under Soil: secretly a goblin, Flora is a member of the Magpie order of human clerics dedicated to healing the sick. When a magical plague leaves her entire convent trapped in quarantine, she sets off in a desperate quest for the mythic Panacea flower, and finds friendship and courage along the way. Mostly light fantasy, with some darker elements at play. No romance, but we do get flora and her two air headed but intelligent new goblin friends Cricket and Thistle who help her find where she truly belongs (as the goblin queen, teaching the rest of them table manners)

The Wyrdwitch: needs overhauling. Currently set in fantasy 1920s Europe, Zorya Kosheka secretly has an extremely rare magic that allows her to dispel otherworldly demons plaguing the continent. She’s brought to France to study under the continents greatest magician, a surprisingly young veteran of the Great War who seems to have nothing in his head but luxury and galas, but knows all too well what Zorya’s trying to hide and how desperately the world needs her skill. It’s a bit harder to summarize this one lol, but it’s about recognizing the possibility of healing from trauma and complex mental health issues and wanting a better life for yourself even if it’s scary. Also it’s about goth witches, theater kids, and a cat who isn’t quite on this plane of existence.

[silvernyxchariot]

Sunday x HSR!Nyx

🎶It’s me, hi, I’m the problem, it’s me.🎶/ref

Synopsis/Warnings⚠️: This will be written as Sunday joining the Astral Express. I was going to write this as a general Witch!Reader x Sunday set of HCs, BUT… I decided against that. ⚠️Now, it is something comforting to myself. This is very fragmented. Written like a set of class notes, so if that isn't your yum, don't yuck mine (aka just leave me alone or block me).

• Trauma, Trauma, Trauma, and a sprinkle of Trauma. Did I mention trauma? HSR!Nyx plays the pagan witch that helps Sunday heal from Gopher Wood’s manipulation and grooming (Nyx follows Ouroboros the Voracity, but plays as Destruction in-game). Nyx looks at Sunday as the representation of those indoctrinated, brainwashed, and stripped of their individuality.

• They couldn’t help but see their past self in Sunday’s hopeless eyes when the poor man was dumped in front of the crew, causing them to have sympathy for the now homeless Halovian. Nyx’s offers to let Sunday stay in their room while Pom Pom prepares Sunday’s own room.

• “I’ve been there. Done that. It never works.” And now seeing him desolate, a mixture of disappointment and sadness rested in Nyx’s heart when the two of them relive what Sunday’s plans using Ena the Order were. While Sunday no longer has the support of the Oak Family and may never see Robin again, Nyx provides a connection to Sunday, a person who can understand what it feels like to lose everything for a cause that one believed in so passionately.

• “Dancing with Devils at Moonrise,” HSR!Nyx’s banner. With Sunday becoming comfortable with the Express crew, he shows them more of his interest and kind nature. Nyx and Sunday dance a fine line between chaotic and orderly. Sunday shows Nyx kindness and support that a healthy growing relationship should have and allows them to remove them from their traumatic thoughts. Both are overthinkers though. Sunday is also a big people pleaser: March 7th and Trailblazer take advantage of this and pull pranks on him.

• “Protect what matters to you. Robin made a deal to keep you out of hell. If you don’t live for yourself, then live for her sake so her sacrifice won’t be in vain.” Nyx would draw sigils in Sunday’s palm while also saying things they think would be helpful for Sunday.

• “When all hope is lost, we look to the stars for hope.” Uses unhinged shit to bring him out of his shell, “Okay, Sunday. Break this entire table full of glass ornaments,” with a tarp underneath for easy clean up later or else Pom Pom will be furious. “But WHY? What’s The Purpose—” Nyx subsequently kicks down the entire table, much to Sunday’s horror.

• “Even your darkest side is a part of you. Harness all of your power.” Acknowledges Sunday is still a grown man that has other life experiences. Leads by example, dragging Sunday along on dangerous stunts when the crew runs into dangerous situations on their next planet, as the Express crew does. Nyx brings Sunday along to commit borderline arson to defeat enemies, also to the Express crews’ horror. “Swallowing them like I did will only poison you more.”

• “I want to bite,” the goth-witch-girlfriend trope that does gremlin shit, like biting his wings out of nowhere. Sunday, the tired-golden-retriever-boyfriend, who learned how to deal with Nyx’s fickle attitude and “mood swings,” knowing full well he now has a murderer as a bodyguard.

• Selfcare days. Mandatory meditation and cleansing days. Retail therapy. Letting Sunday be an adult who wasn’t allowed to be a child, “Buy your Robin merch, I’ll pay for it.” “You want to dye your hair red like Himeko’s? Okay.” “You want to get more piercings? Sure. Let’s got matching pieces.” “But isn’t this all just avarice and gluttony. I don’t need this—” “Put it in the cart, we’re buying it.”

[gwydionmisha]

Personal: The New Meds Turn On Me

The new meds side effect wave hit hard and dangerous Thursday, but I'm not sure it didn't start a lot earlier.  

Okay, so I had a viscous headache last Friday night for about three hours, which didn't particularly shock me, as my body just does stuff like that.  Same Saturday.  Normal.  Sunday.  Monday.  I made a note to mention it to the doctor Tuesday morning, but forgot.  I noticed Tuesday's headache at the same time was absolutely crushing for three hours, then shut off like a faucett as if it had never been.  Which is creepy and wrong.  So I'm now weighing if the new meds improvement is worth creepy three hour debilitating headache every day, and if I should call it in the next day.

So Wednesday I wake up to one of my body is very, very bad days.  which is a thing that happens sometimes, especially if my body's been to far which between the uncleaner and the extreme heat and this being the worse time of year for my allergies and assorted RL commitments including the doctor is not weird.  Plus I'm... I forget how many days in on struggling to type on Klaus Laptop because its hard to lift my arm the extra nine and a half inches, and i'm mostly having to drink with a straw because i go half my wake cycle not being ably to lift a full glass of water that high and I'm dropping things because my arms are fucked.  which happens.  All of it really stresses out my body though, you follow?  

So sometimes the alarm goes off because I have to go somewhere and my body nopes out of it, or tries to.  So I'm exhausted.  I have the shakes.  I end up way late to pick up Goth Millennial because it's just that hard to move.  So I drive Goth Millennial around and wait in the car while they do errands.  Goth Millennial goes outside to putter in the garden.  I lung, then take a nap, all with Tavy glued to my chest, because it's sometimes better after a nap.  Resets everything to a more acceptable level of crappy.  

I make it all the way up to minimally functional by the time the other Millennials arrive for dinner.  One of them had brought pre-marrinated and cooked tofu.  Me: I think we should make rice for it.  With coconut milk and saffron and Turmeric.  New Millennial: Oooo!  That sounds delicious!  Me: It's possible I'm edging up towards Indonesian happy rice except I don't have any lemon grass.  But I do have Bay leaves....  So it ends up with New Millennial Making Rice and the two of us keep consulting on spices until i have to lie down again.  The results we excellent.

Tavy is still clearly traumatized from the Uncleaner.  He loves techie Millennial.  Techie Millennial was the first visitor he let pet and play with him.  He hid from the Millennials when they arrived after nap time.  He did eventually come out and watch them for a bit and even rubbed against Techies legs, but ran if it even looked like someone might tough her.  I'm still so angry about the uncleaner traumatizing him like this.

Really, I just wanted to go to bed after they left, but I needed to stay up for the morning allergy treatment.  My body was really not moving well, but I dragged myself there and back, which nearly did me in.  I did manage to prep for bed and climb in, which really fucking hurt, at which point the first wave of hallucinations and fast heartbeat and arrhythmia hit.  So that was fun.  Me: Guess that's it for new Meds.  They were amazing while they lasted.

They must have been really busy at the doctor because they didn't get back to me until afternoon.  I left a message for my doctor's nurse, conveying that I was having severe side effects and needed to know if I should go to the ER.  No one ever got back to me.  The heart stuff got really bad for four or five hours, always with visual hallucinations.  I thought about calling for help, but my right arm wasn't working and my left wasn't great either, and it's usually eight hours minimum to get seen at the ER and they yell at you if you bring in chest pains that turn out not to be a heart attack, and the pain only happened when I moved so it was likely just torso muscles screaming about my arms.  

But the supper high irregular heart beat for hours can't be good.  I wrote this waiting for receptionist call back Friday morning.  I was 36 minutes in on the wait as I typed this sentence.  I really think they should check my heart, but if they are this busy... Yeah.  I'm assuming if it was really dangerous, they'd return my call from yesterday instead of continuing to ignore my message.

[ethicstownpod]

Full disclosure I did come from twitter but I do wanna hear more about the heist show

Oh my gosh, ok ok, I don’t think I’ve written about this at length to anyone except Mick before and he already KNOWS how weird I am, lemme try:

CW: this post will talk about poverty, unrequited love, child abuse, disordered eating, depression, and meltdowns

The basic premise is that there’s a trio of small-time thieves who keep accidentally stealing supernatural items. They’d been doing it for a couple of years straight out of uni, but we’re picking back up on their first heist in ~18 months.

Isaac is a tech whiz from a very loving but very low-income family. He was already a queer, alt-scene kid in Glasgow, but after a family catastrophe they relocated to suburban London, and then he was a queer, alt-scene kid FROM Glasgow. He’s very gentle, very focused, and very bad at sharing his feelings. And he’s desperately in love with Drystan - that’s not even a spoiler, it’s basically just the plot! He’s only 25 but he’s been an adult for decades and it really shows. When he’s alone he’s just really, really sad.

Drystan is an old-timey no-door-can-hold-me, get-out-of-handcuffs, crawl-through-vents, dodge-lasers kinda thief, from a pretty affluent VERY abusive family. He and Isaac stopped pulling heists 18 months ago because he finally had one breakdown too many, saw a therapist, got diagnosed with autism, and started taking medication for depression. He used to be a hard-as-nails goth-punk - rake-thin, hair down to his waist, inch of makeup - but the Drystan WE meet is an adorable, chunky nerd who dresses (and acts) like a Sesame Street character. He is NOT in love with Isaac.

Bea is a couple years older than the boys and BOY do they lord it over them. They’re clearly the brains of any operation - until they’re working with Drystan, who just REALLY gets on their nerves. They didn’t stop heisting when the boys did, and so now work “professionally” smuggling medication (to those in need, but sometimes for recreation, they don’t care). They’ve gotten married, adopted a kid, and got a girlfriend in the time the boys have been away. They’re not committed to the trio like they used to be, and it causes some friction.

The first heist back, the boys steal creepy puppets that look like them from a museum, and we go from there!

There isn’t much plot to spoil, the plot arcs are quite formulaic, it’s the character arcs that really drive the show; it’s very much a character driven comedy. It’s simultaneously both way lighter and way darker than it sounds - the first episode is almost 100% jokes, but at certain points Isaac just absolutely breaks down crying, and Drystan has a headphones-on, can’t-communicate-verbally meltdown.

It’s a lot of fun to write. Even if I don’t get to make it all I think I’ll write it all.

[anotherrunawaytrain]

To fellow goths: Do you ever see other goths out in public and think, “Wow. They’re gothing way harder than me right now. They are committed, and I must look like a child” ? Because that’s how I feel all the time.

Like, I can’t afford to be as goth as I want, and I also don’t have any safe clothes storage right now, so I don’t have all the fun accessories. I have bad rosacea, so doing full makeup often irritates my face and makes it worse, so I don’t get to do as much cool makeup as I’d like (if I can even get the red covered enough to not effect the final look).

I feel like I’m just a casual goth most days. When I do see another one in the wild, it’s always the full deal with makeup, fishnets, belts/chains… All I can do is appreciate from over here and hope my face doesn’t look like I hate them when I’m adoring, admiring, and envying. 🥰

[rissynicole]

...I mean... it’s not wrong...

i made a goth, scene, emo generator  

[eggroll-sama]

Record of Ragnarok: Ideal s/o Headcanons

Female!reader

Warning: suggestive, mention of sex

Poseidon

Poseidon will want someone that will aesthetically compliment his looks and reputation. In other words, he’d like someone that is beautiful, but not as beautiful as him. Specifically, he doesn’t really have a preference. You just need to have nice teeth, kept hair, glowing and unblemished skin, a symmetrical face, and on and on and on. Just don’t be more beautiful than him, thank you.

Personality wise, he’d like someone that is feminine, intelligent and regal.

You can be dominant and arrogant with others, just don’t be when you’re with him. It’ll tarnish his reputation as a strong and fearsome god. Also if you are a virgin he would like that. It would boost his ego to know he has the privilege to be the only one to be with you.

He wants you to be intelligent and to be well versed in history, mathematics, language, and the sciences. He’s more traditional and emphasizes more importance on book smarts than street smarts. Also, if you’re really good at debating and holding your own in an argument, he’d find it very attractive. For example, if during a godly meeting you were to stand your own on a stance against another god, he’d be so smug and in love with you. He wouldn’t show it on his face, but once you get back to the castle he would pin you against the wall and make out with you, growling under his breathe about how it was your fault for making him this way.

Not Ideal: dumb, domineering, scheming :)

More characters under the cut!

Thor

Loki sometimes badgers him about his ideal s/o. He wouldn’t answer him -much to his cousin's chagrin- but in his mind his love would have long dark hair and a nice smile.

Personality wise, he’d like someone that is strong. In any type of sense. He would prefer a more physically strong lover, but it is not a requirement. He emphasizes the most on a strong mentality. He believes no matter how muscular or large you are, without a strong soul you are weak. He understands the hardships of being the lover of a god; they’d have to have the mental strength to overcome difficulties of being in that position.

Also, he’d prefer if you are extroverted. He struggles with talking or giving an opinion, so someone that can enhance communication will be great. Of course he’s a really observant god, but observing can take him only so far; a person that is willing to talk to him about everyday things or their problems will make him happy (though he doesn’t show it).

Not Ideal: secretive, complainer, weak-minded

Loki

I know he’s literally a shapeshifting god and he transformed into some pretty ugly things in the past, but he still has preferences in terms of looks. If you like piercings and tattoos he’d be very interested in you since he has several of his own. He also finds the grunge/goth look attractive. He loves beauty marks on his partner. But he’d hide that and tease you about them like a jerk. Also, the guy is a sucker for chubby cheeks. He’d be touching them every chance he gets. You feel like a stress ball sometimes.

He wants a partner in crime to pull pranks with and on. Someone that is creative, funny, and a tease. His family is literally full of straight faces; he wants someone that will laugh with him and talk with him about nonsensical ideas. A naturally curious person that will indulge in various ideas and hypotheticals will be perfect for him.

There needs to be something about you that is interesting. It could be intelligence, physical/mental strength, your way of thinking, how you dress, etc. Something that sets you apart from other people. If you are just a normal, everyday individual, he probably won’t give you a second glance. And no, being like the “quirky” girls on TikTok does not count.

Not Ideal: too quiet, serious, bland

Lu Bu

He’s drinking with his soldiers and they ask him in a drunk haze what his “ideal lover” would be. Lu Bu is honest and tells them he’s not interested in commiting to a relationship. He’s not going to date someone when he has the goal of being the strongest. He has one night stands to vent his frustrations and quench his boredom, but that’s the limit. He also deems it very unlikely for him to find love in this time period. Not that he really cares about those sort of things. Doesn’t really believe in true love either.

But low and behold, Lu Bu’s trustworthy strategist, Chen Gong, has spent many a night thinking about this very same topic. He’s deduced from observing his general’s personality and every day interactions that Lu Bu would be best compatible with a strong-minded, caring woman. He needs someone that can rile him up in all sorts of ways. Somehow, a woman that can make a smart remark every once in a while would be a nice change. Someone that has the courage to talk to him. His general hasn’t met a woman who sticks around after seeing his ferocity on the battlefield.

Chen Gong believes they have to be caring. Lu Bu is surrounded by bloodshed and war everyday. He feels that what his general needs the most in a partner is someone that is supportive and will let Lu Bu be vulnerable. Someone that will let Lu Bu relax after a long fought battle. Someone that will treat him like a human than worship or envy his strength.

(Chen Gong doesn’t know this, but Lu Bu finds it attractive when women eat a lot)

Not ideal (according to Chen Gong): cowardly, weak-minded, apathetic

Adam

He doesn’t care about looks. He’s the father of humanity, he loves every single type of person: tall or short, hairy or thin hair, big boobs no boobs, etc.

Ideally, Adam wants someone who has a motherly aura and has a kind and selfless heart. Someone who’s gentle and has a nurturing heart. Someone who shows gratitude and appreciation for what they are given.

Although he’s strong, he wants to be with a person that he can trust and rely on. Someone he can be vulnerable with. It will take time for him to warm up to you. He’d have to be sure that you are a good person and will confess to you once he’s gotten to know you for a long time.

Adam also likes to tease and play around sometimes behind closed doors, so he’d like it if you aren’t the most easily-offended person. He’d feel awful if he’s just lightly teasing you and you make a big deal out of it and ignore him.

Not ideal: self-centered, overreactor, untrustworthy

Sasaki

Like Lubu he strives for strength, but is more open to the idea of a relationship. When he was still alive, he’d daydream about having a lover beside him. They’d have the prettiest smile, and skin as smooth as the softened glass shards by the ocean shores. Somebody who’d accompany him on his journey, perhaps. Someone who possessed a voice of wisdom because he knows he isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed.

Although he’d occasionally feel lonely camping alone in the forest, it really wasn’t on his to-do list to find a lover. He felt that the perfect person is the one who will see him for who he is and love him for it no matter what.

They need to be independent. Somebody that wouldn’t mind a long distance relationship. His travels might take 1-2 months, or maybe 6 months. He would occasionally show up at your house unannounced with a gift from his travels. If you try convince him to stay, he’d feel really guilty and might break up with you because you deserve somebody that doesn’t stress you out. But if you’re up for it, he wouldn’t mind taking you with him!

Not ideal: dependent, stability > taking risks

[shitpostingkats]

Yu-Gi-Oh Review Roundup: GX!

Favorite main character: Chazz Princeton

The Chazz. The yugioh rival who, barely five episodes into the first season, gets fed up with being in the show, sails away on a yacht, shipwrecks, is rescued by card game playing russians, gets adopted by said russians after beating all of them back to back in a 50 man gauntlet, and returns to the main plot triumphantly riding a submarine with an entire crowd of slavs chanting his name.

In, uh... *checks watch* episode 25.

Chazz is one of those yugioh characters who’s just always doing the most he possibly can, and you gotta love him for it. And unlike some prideful anime rivals, he actually has the skills to back it up. Skills you actually get to watch him build himself, from the ground up, after having his fall from grace/russian sabbatical. Which just makes it even more satisfying to see him tear into duels, because his archetype of choice, and his whole arc in general, is about using the most unintimidating, unwanted, and least powerful monsters. It’s like the pokemon trainers who threaten to beat you into next week, and then bring out. A magikarp.

Except he then absolutely trashes you with said magikarp. And clomps away in his big goth platforms, loudly proclaiming that magikarp are annoying, and stupid, and he definitely doesn’t like them. Nu-uh. Ignore the maxed out friendship stat.

Up until the heavier plot kicks in in season three, Chazz has hands down the best character arcs of GX. His fight to break free of his abusive brothers’ control, his crabby assimilation into the Slifer Squad, his brief stint and subsequent escape from a Literal Cult (yeah that happens in gx don’t worry about it). Chazz is such a charismatic and well developed character that, when he kinda vanishes for like a dozen episodes, only to reappear, having won an entire tournament offscreen, being heralded by banner-bearers, and carried on a freaking PALANQUIN

I stood up and CHEERED.

Favorite antagonist: The Dark King

The most stunning of trope subversions in a season chock-full of them. Yes, Yubel may be a more threatening and complex villain, but they have so much going on between the dub vs. sub battle, they may get the final save-the-world card game at the end of the season, but the Dark King is such an equally nuanced and menacing antagonist.

Because he’s the protagonist.

 The dark king is every concept I loved about the Yamis in DM, the idea that parts of ones soul aren’t wholly power of friendship goodness, the idea that you can still choose to be an anime protag even if there’s darkness living inside of you. Because being kind is hard. And the act of pursuing it hits so much harder when we see how much it costs to turn down the other path.

Again, I’m a sucker for any character arc even remotely analogous to mental illness. If you see a pattern in the way I review media, I wholeheartedly claim it. I am a simple creature.

But the Dark King also functions so fantastically as both a metaphor and a subversion because we’ve seen the trope of a Superpowered Evil Side before. The show is betting on that. The twist comes in that the Dark King is not some malevolent, foreign entity. That it’s Jaden. Just a scared kid, lashing out at the world and forced to deal with the consequences. And he’s not evil.

Whereas Marik shows with dealing in the part of yourself that wants to commit atrocities, Jaden takes it the next step, and has to accept that you can’t just get rid of it. You have to live with it. Rein it in. But be kind to it. Because it is you, and it just wants to keep you safe and it may be wrong and a base impulse but punishing your worst instincts is not only self harmful, it is impossible.

You may have instantly internalized any negative emotion out of shame, and yes, you may somedays even be controlled by it. But do not fear it. Learn to work in tandem with your rage. Do not let it possess you, but do not imprison it either.

The Dark King is one of those stories that I really think I needed to hear as a kid, but even now, consuming the series as an adult, doesn’t make that message any less impactful.

Favorite side character: Tyranno Hassleberry

Back in the early days of 2021, before the first season of yugioh dm was even a passing consideration of a thought in my mind, I decided to poll my online friends and determine what they thought the Best Worst Name in localized yugioh.

These were people that had never watched yugioh, never so much as glanced at the card game.

We started with 32 names.

After five rounds of voting, only one was left standing.

Tyranno Hassleberry beat Maximillion Pegasus, and thus was crowned the ultimate champion of Best Bad Yugioh Name.

Some might say this championship gave me a bit of a preemptive bias towards the funny dinosaur man.

They’d be right.

Imagine my delight, however, when this already-primed-for-stupidity name got a face, and we learn that big, dumb, real himbo of a yugioh name is attached to an equally big and dumb himbo of typical yugioh absurdity. I mean, truly, Tyranno Hassleberry is everything I love about yugioh worldbuilding, personified. In a series that takes an up close examination of the partnerships between man and monster, and the terrible psychological effects thereof, Hassleberry stands as the shining example of a character so full of love and stupidity that he is immune to the horrors.

While Jaden “What is attraction” Yuki is off getting ptsd from his partnership with a dragon demon that hyperfocuses on relationships so hard that it has put people into comas, Tyranno is also there. Just vibing. Hassleberry, do you have such a strong spiritual connection to your ace monster that you might be genuinely inhuman? Do you also have special anime eyes and mild superpowers? How’s that going? Good? Good!

The world of yugioh not only can provide rich, nuanced explorations on mental wellness and the very idea of identity, it can also provide a man who is half dinosaur and it is only ever lightly remarked upon. Apparently, the solution to surviving an ever expanding universe of unreality and cosmic horrors beyond your imagination is just. Be kind. Be happy. Talk about dinosaurs.

Favorite duel: Yubel vs. Zane

A masterclass on how non-plot-relevant duels can still contribute SO much to the show and its characters.

Zane is a funny little weirdo. The walking personification of Gifted Kid Burnout, this dude graduated valedictorian and then immediately proceeded to get kicked in the ribs by the realities of non-academic living, causing him to sink into a deep and self harmful depression spiral, obsessed with pulling others down to his level and proving to them that happy go lucky positivity is only a naive shield in the face of true adversity and cruelty.

*Laughs a bit too forcefully* What a funny dude!

Zane has basically been on a downward slide in mental wellbeing since season two, and at this point, seems to have reached a natural stopping point in his corruption arc. Tired, washed out, and pessimistic, but at least comfortable in his status quo of being An Absolute Mess. He’s teamed up with Aster as sort of the token chaotic neutrals of the party, the only ones edgy enough to do things like casual torture and murder, but he’s attempted to reach out to his brother, and has even begrudgingly been roped into protecting the gang as they make their final stand against Yubel. He seems to be operating under the belief that while he no longer has to try so hard to rid the highschoolers of their delusions that the power of love and friendship will save the day, he’s still a depressed snot rag wrapped in a black leather overcoat.

That fantastic bit of ex-villainous personality gets to go head to head against the current villainous personality, and it is a treat. Yubel and Zane carry entire scenes through sheer force of presence, and seeing them snark and attempt to out edgelord each other is a delight.

But it also is a very pivotal point for Zane’s character because, for once, he is not the most mentally unstable person in the room. That honor goes to Jaden, newly traumatized, and about to start rolling down the same hill. Zane recognizes those self destructive behaviors, even attempts to warn Jaden that refusing to acknowledge his actions will only lead to further harm, but before he can properly sit down and explain to Jaden that self harmful behaviors are bad actually, and that electrocuting yourself to feel any semblance of emotion is actually a massive holy shit red flag, Yubel interrupts them.

So now, Zane, Failure Big Brother Extraordinaire, has to come to some semblance of peace with his own emo demons, while battling Jaden’s for him (both literally and figuratively).

The sheer panache of two of the most wonderful anti-heros of yugioh, the emotional turmoil of Zane’s inner conflict, the realistic portrayal of how we process trauma, plus the absolute YUGIOH MOVE that is choosing to die of card game induced heart attack. Honestly, I could go on about this duel forever.

Favorite arc: Quest for the Rainbow Dragon

I mentioned previously that I started watching yugioh as something to have on in the background, usually while I sewed. The Quest for the Rainbow Dragon is the arc that made me put down my needle and actually devote my full attention to watching the show.

GX is a show full of subverting audience expectations. I have my own opinions on the prioritization of shock-bait over consistent plot writing, but I also can’t deny that when Adrian Gecko just shrugged off his shirt and engaged in freaking fisticuffs, I was speechless for a whole five minutes.

In between one blink and the next, GX went from a weird early 2000s merchandise advert that occasionally had character writing and the oh-so-rare taste of legitimately serious writing, to a full on survival horror anime. The surreal, empty desert environment of the spirit world, the main cast slowly whittled down and frequently split up, the eerie monologues of Yubel and their legitimately unnerving horror visuals; all contribute to this claustrophobic feeling of dread. The panic of the students feels real.

And QftRD, despite being the first entry in GX’s much darker and grander second half, makes wonderful use of smaller scale episode plots. Entire episodes are devoted to the struggle of moving from one room in the school to the next, or negotiating for enough food to survive just another day. Every main character gets to shine in aspects that we’ve only seen hints of in their lives of status quo card games: whether it’s Alexis’ natural leadership, Hassleberry and Axels’ military skills, Crowler’s actual want to protect the students’ well being, or Jaden and Jesse just finally getting to explore their connections with duel monster spirits. Heck, even the unnamed students get to shine, using their knowledge of the school to navigate through hidden passages.

It’s such a shock to the system, after two and a half seasons of decidedly not small scale apocalyptic survival. The transition from Saturday Morning Cartoon Weirdness to PTSD War Crime Hours is very jarring and unexpected, even if you know it’s going to happen. But the duel zombies arc goes a long way to make that pivot feel deserved, to give actual weight to the sacrifices and choices the characters are about to make.

Also, I somehow managed to write this entire thing without realizing this is my second time my favorite arc in a ygo show has been the one with the word ‘dragon’ in the title.

Greatest strengths of the series:

The slow burn from shonen cartoon to cosmic horror trope subversion.

Truly, I can only compare GX to a handful of other shows that have ever come within the same ballpark of a viewing experience. The closest I can get is maybe relating it to Red vs Blue: One of my favorite shows of all time. And one that it’s absolutely impossible to get into.

See, with both GX and RvB, they’re shows that start out silly, unconnected, and (don’t worry, I love both of these shows with almost my entire heart), bad. Now, an impatient viewer might be tempted to just skip to the point where the show takes off, where it quote unquote “gets good”. But the problem is, if you attempt to cut out all the chaff, you lose what fundamentally makes the sudden spike in writing quality so compelling: the unexpectedness of it.

GX grabbed my attention by the throat in Waking The Dragon, because, up until then, I’d been using it as chill background fodder. Jaden felt so real to me as a protagonist and a person, because I’d spent fourty hours watching him be a normal protagonist/teenager. The previous episodes might not have done much to advance in terms of the plot, but they delivered something equally important: A status quo.

And when that status quo is broken, it feels much more powerful to the audience because it feels so fundamentally wrong. Just like it’s insane to watch in real time as RvB goes from being a bunch of outdated loosely strung together skits to a military drama waxing poetic about morality, GX spins on a dime from “Saturday morning cartoon” to “Cosmic horror meta tropefest”, and every episode you want to look up from the screen and go “How. Wh- Who let them just... do this?” Who let them set out to write one kind of story, and then not bother to correct them when they started doing something completely different? And why is it so good?

That is a very rare feeling in media, I think. To be so truly and utterly thrown off guard by a change in story direction, yet having more fun than you possibly could with some so-called “good” stories. And I think it’s a feeling worth cherishing.

Weakest points:

The slow burn from shonen cartoon to cosmic horror trope subversion.

The other reason I compare GX to Red vs. Blue is the fact that they are both shows that I cannot in good conscience recommend to friends.

“Here’s this show I like,” I say.

“Oh, cool, I’ll check it out!”

They return, minutes to hours later.

“So, I started that show you like and uh. Are you aware it is? Bad?”

“Yeah, don’t worry, it gets better-”

“Oh, sweet, cause I was really worried-”

“-Just give it a couple seasons!”

“I, uh.” They tug at their collar. “Can I skip the bad parts?”

“No. :D”

Hours and hours of time sunk into a mediocrity on the off-chance it “gets good” is a tough pill to swallow for most people. It’s a tough pill to swallow for me, and I willingly aspire to watch every yugioh anime. Add on top of that poor production quality,  bloated plot bunnies, and some writing that has aged like milk, and you have. Well. A benign watching experience, at minimum.

And like I said, there’s good ingredients to the final storyline buried in all that early stuff! Just skipping directly to the middle in a hope to reach “the part everyone talks about” fundamentally waters down the experience, leaving you struggling to understand what has fans going bananas.

Why does the show hit you on the head 200 times with a hammer? Cause it feels so good when it stops!

Now, I’m not your parent, and you can watch tv shows however you want. If you only watched seasons 3 and 4 of GX, then by god, you watched GX, and you are welcome at the discussion table. Get in here, amigo. Your opinion matters just as much as mine.

GX is very difficult to review, in comparison to all its other sister shows, because the aspects some people praise are the very aspects others could never really get into the show because of. Its greatest strength as a story and its greatest weakness as a show are one in the same. It’s sort of this weird child of the family, unable to be talked about without a lot of contradiction and conversational backtracking. Is GX the best show of the three? Maybe. Is it my favorite? No, with an asterisk. Is it some people’s favorite? Absolutely.

If you changed it, made the plot tighter, the writing more concise, had a planned narrative from the beginning and slowly worked in elements of the larger endgame, would those same people still like it, in the same fervor?

I don’t think so.

Most yugioh moment:

YA SEE, A FEW YEARS BACK, ON A ROUTINE DIG FOR DINOSAUR FOSSILS, A LANDSLIDE BROKE OUT AND NEARLY BROKE MY LEG IN TWO. THEY HAD TO OPERATE QUICKLY, SO THEY USED THE DINOSAUR BONE I FOUND TO SAVE MY LEG. EVER SINCE, I'VE HAD WHAT THEY CALL DINO DNA. THE DOCTOR SAYS IT MAKES ME STRONGER THAN THE AVERAGE JOE.

[jgabi51]

Trans Head-cannon Thing

[With a drawing included at the end]

I know I kin only mostly male characters and usually its the one that are a bit more feminine and/or fruity in their design or personality. This of course leads to the “what if they were transmasc?” Head-cannon. Which I full support and anyone and everyone can like and believe whatever they want. I am most of the time a big time supporter of the trans head-cannon. But rarely ever enact this head-cannon in my own content because I without fail run into the obstacle of, “if they’re transmasc, then I can’t draw them in pretty dresses!” Then I get sad.

But, and I don’t really know how to explain this, however I have recently looked back at a series and one character I usually ignored within it. (They’re now my favorite character from that series) that series is the 2012 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and the character is Leo (because of course it is). I’ve also watched the 2003 series and I now realize I am just a Leo kinnie across the board. Minus 2007, he can go die. I used to say I liked Donnie just cause I like purple but now I see the truth. The Donnies were either not fruity enough, were simps, or didn’t get enough screen time for me to get to know them. Thats not say I didn’t enjoy them, all the turtles are great but I am a sucker for the clearly (to some measure) gay ones.

Now you might be saying “2012 Leo isn’t gay. He likes his sister too much for that.” And I get that. In fact after the revelation that Karai was his sister he backed off. But not all the way off, because he kept trying to hangout with her in later seasons. His emo phase literally was spent with him getting in on girls night with Karai and Shinigami and joining them in committing crimes. In those left over ‘signs of a crush’ after the reveal as some call them there weren’t really any blushes or hearts or any clear indication of romantic feelings between them. It mostly was just Leo trying to be a bad boy and doing what he thought was right, hence his emo/goth phase. No one was as emo and goth as Karai so obviously he went to her. All this is too say that yes, while there may have been a bit of romantic feels on Leos part at first. I think that the signs after their (kinda) blood connection was brought to light , cause the turtles were mutated with Splinters blood or DNA and Karai is Splinters daughter, and overall feelings was just ✨gender envy✨.

Cause I mean like everyone agrees that Rise Leo is in some capacity attracted to men. And 2003 Leo is just too but only for Usagi. They both gave me the fruity vibes but 2012 Leos fruity vibes tasted a bit different. I couldn’t put my finger on it until I saw on TikTok that people were saying that he was transfem and therefore was actually a she. And I was like, “yes! Thats it! Thats what the vibes the fruit was giving!”

So may I present to you ✨her✨

God I haven’t drawn the 2012 turtles since elementary. Muscle memory didn’t kick in or more likely didn’t exist but I’d say this turned out pretty good. So in reference to the problem I presented in the first paragraph I have found the solution of just drawing a transfem character.

[noctilionoidea]

Monster High Gen 3 movie review

I YOHOHOED IT. FOUND THE LINK but I’m not gonna link it here unless asked. I don’t support the director but I did want to watch it since there’s a lot of hate, which makes me want to give it a chance at the least for the actors. This is just my personal opinion, as an og fan since the age of 5 when I found Draculaura at target. This series is part of what inspired me as a goth. But since this is for the children of today, I want to view it with neither a positive of negative bias. Anyways, I’m just a kid with opinions that you can disagree with.

no matter the quality, it is a reboot. When I was little I saw my little pony turn the femme fashionista Rainbow Dash I knew into the jock we know today. I was only pissy for a week because I didn’t find them to even slightly the same character. I still don’t, even after I became a fan and eventually grew out of it (not that I think I’m too old, I’m just not a huge mlp fan anymore). Reboots often turn characters unrecognizable for better or worse. It’s a normal result. If your pissed about that beyond “we were asking for a gen 1 revival and don’t trust Mattel saw a corporation” I suggest you go mountain hiking or something. Anything to get your mind off it because you are clearly in need of it.

main takeaway; I don’t hate it.

it reminds me of the boy who cried werewolf, another Nickelodeon Halloween movie that, like the og monster high, i grew up on. The musical numbers are okay. They’re pop songs which aren’t my taste, but they aren’t horrific and “out of the dark” or whatever its called, is pretty good. The background music is reminiscent of old 90s Halloween movies.

THE COSTUMING ISNT AS SHIT AS EVERYONE SAYS IT IS. Seriously, if you see a highschooler you know they dress like shit. Heck, I am that highschooler half the time. Even in full goth attire I’m limited, I’m seventeen and not allowed to wear fishnets. fishnets! They don’t look horrid, just slightly cheap.

here’s some things I dislike

clawdeen and Deuce have a half assed romance. We all knew this, but like, they don’t even commit to it anyways, and cleo (who he broke up with pre movie) still has better chemistry with both of them. I feel people make too big a deal of lesbian clawdeen (she’s had male love interests, it’s simply a headcanon beloved by the creator as well. That being said she does have in g1 tons of lesbian coding so it’s still a slap in the face).

it opens with clawdeen in a skate park, but has absolutely no reason to be like that. Was it to make her relatable? By pulling “sick skateboard moves dawg” or something? It’s not a new character trait either, never comes up again. She could’ve been going for a walk or run and it would’ve hit the same notes.

Clawdeen has no personality. It’s been stripped of her to make her relatable and failed miserably. I can’t name an interest or anything.

draculaura has a personality, but with making her pure goth (a decision I actually love as she was originally a Victorian goth) they’ve taken away her bubbliness. She’s not horrid, but it’s sad, because it was an opportunity to have a bubbly goth vampire witch.

Komos is named for a Greek Satyr but is meant to be a Minotaur “Hyde monster” hybrid?? As someone familiar with Komos, boy satyr in the retinue of his father the god Dionysos, there were… so many better possibilities.

Hyde is not an active part of the movie, but he’s got a huge influence. Hyde is intended to be a monster, with Jekyll as his human half. As a fan of the strange case of doctor Jekyll and mister Hyde, it’s not the worst representation of the character, as they seem to be one and not another boring split personality, but! Hyde is clearly meant to be perceived mainly as a monster, but in the novella he’s mainly a chemical induced transformation that results in Jekyll being… a horrid dumbass. Hyde is also depicted as muscular despite his real description being of a young and hairy scrawny short man. As a Jekyll/Hyde kinnie (jk) I do not like how my trash goblin doctor gets portrayed and am taking it out on this.

ghoulia speaks English. I’m ready to punt whoever did that. Like she’s kinda charming but just… it was always important that she seems to be foreign language or nonverbal, you know?

monsters that were marketed as more prevailing were just there or background characters. It’s just really clickbait-y.

that being said

I liked witch Draculaura. She’s cute in a different way than Draculaura. Dracula puts pressure on her to be the best vampire ever (though never spoken), and hates human magic, which is witchcraft. And yeah, that makes sense as witchcraft is historically a thing of humans in close relation to the supernatural and or divine. Vampires and witches canoncially have an ongoing war between them, it’s a miracle he allows her to practice in the end. She’s socially isolated and cold in part because not only does she fail to live up to her father’s expectations academically, but also indulges in activities he hates. And her other outfits look significantly better than than the promotional image thank god.

Clawdeen has a very sweet relationship with her father, which keeps her from turning into a full monster when given the chance, because he’s important to her and she doesn’t want to erase his side of her. He’s scared for her but allows her to go to monster high because it’s what she needs. They have such a good relationship and it’s nice to see.

Cleo simply seemed to go through the old “mean girl to friend” in the same way she did originally. She’s done pretty well in general. She trained under the magic god Heka while alive, and she does her best to help in the climax, getting over her biases.

Lagoona is Cleo’s bestie here, but she’s not done wrong whatsoever. She’s there to defend Cleo when she thinks that deuce has left her emotionally hurt and shows worry and compassion in her few scenes, in which she is never the focus… that’s not great but. She also has an accent still, just not Australian. So she doesn’t get to have that moment where she says-

Frankie is literally. The greatest. They’re the absolute highlight in my opinion. I feel they still embody the Frankie from the other versions, but with new aspects. They’re made of famous people in both mind and body (freida Kahlo’s hands, Shakespeare’s liver, the heart of some farmer, etc.) they have a bunch of knowledge but are socially unaware of how to interact. They’re autism coded!! It makes me happy! I too, am autistic!!! They also have the best jokes and it’s totally worth pirating to watch, just for them💖. You just know that if Og Frankie met them, she’d immediately get along with them.

Abby and holt play football with a foot in one scene. And then talk about eating it. There’s a lot of cannibalism jokes, but the football one was funny (Frankie again, is a huge reason why).

It’s not great. It’s very flawed. One might say it’s bad. But whatever kid who watches this, is probably able to enjoy it. I did, in spite of it being so unrecognizable from the series of my childhood. I hope the show will be better though. (I also hope holt’s adopted there)

I don’t think it’s worth ALL the hate it gets. It’s not brilliant, but if you’re not supporting the dickwad director I think it’s worth killing time for.

[accursedkaleeshi]

Anonymous asked:

write the firewalls fic you Horde-playing coward /lh --Solstice

Solstice asked about a fic idea I had. I don’t usually have the brain wiring to commit to full fics so I have just been informally summarizing them. I have had a couple other asks & ideas like this so I am going to call them Bullet Point Fics. Will make a post to link them later

This Bullet Point Fic ended up being fulfillment of some need I have for my fucked up blorbos to be witnessed & validated by other characters in the full glory of just how physically destroyed they are & how they are dealing. So I am calling it the:

“Damn, Bitch, You Live Like This?” BPF

Synopsis: General Grievous becomes aware of another of many Separatist security measures installed in his own systems to control him. I rewrite the Clone Wars Gungan episode & force (hah) the Jedi to realize Grievous used to be a person. Highlights include Disaster lineage shenanigans, Grievous roasting everyone at any given opportunity, body horror, Dooku Drama™, & a whole lot of unfathomable sadness. Last update 2k words

Prologue

·     In a moment of lucidity, Grievous takes stock of what technical systems he has access to & some things he does not. Knowing me, there would be like 5 pages right out the gate waxing poetic about his relationship with technology.

·     Grievous noclips through the very particular firewalls put on his tracking systems specifically to keep him out of them because he was being nosy.

·     The goths Sith are alerted. There are consequences for his actions.

·     Made to attend a Separatist HR meeting about it where they talk about him like he’s a new car & not even there. Wat Tambor is being weird. Grievous can’t tell if it is usual Wat Weird or not bc he has had some drugs forced upon him in Dooku & Poggle’s attempt to make him forget that he found the tracking signals.

o  Sorry. Just. Imagined the Separatist council bitching in a conference room & Grievous is just standing behind Dooku with dilated pupils wishing he was dead. Wat Tambor keeps making eye contact that he is not registering as weird.

·     Grievous was kind of used to being in altered states by then & he remembers much more than the Separatists even know about. Except Dooku, they said all kinds of shit around him bc they thought of him as a droid. Wat Tambor dropped the name of the new encryption tech they were going to use.

·     The general continues doing general things, playing dumb when it suits him. He is an Olympic gold medalist at playing dumb, maneuvering around xenophobes & the like that think he is far beneath them.

Our Least Favorite Clone Wars Episode

·     Later: The main characters manage to be nice enough to the gungans that they agree to help them make a Sombra Ult EMP bomb with their very limited & precious booma plasma. (I hate star wars bc I spent minutes of my life on the wiki looking for what the bombs were called just for them to be called boomas)

·     Alternative “Shadow Warrior” episode timeline things would occur wherein they have a hard time keeping Grievous locked down. He is not deterred by being in a giant bubble underwater & is generally being a huge pain in the ass. Deadpan threatens to fry Boss Nass with citrus & scallops.

·     Padmé gets a development arc. Convinces Anakin not to chase down the turn coat gungan (Rishi Loo, I think). She’s like “The general of the ENTIRE opposing galactic army is traumatizing Gunga city waiting for his ride out. We can’t let the Count come in here with an army to pick up his machine & make a mess of Naboo, right?” Anakin is like “you’re so smart, babe.”

o  Padme’s development includes trying to be diplomatic to Grievous even though he is scary to stand in front of. Grievous is a bitch about it & picked up on anidala quickly bc he’s not fucking blind. Padme chastises him for being unprofessional & he sort of concedes for the time being. Unclear if out of any actual respect or just bc he thinks its funny.

·     Anakin slaps together a big brain comms jammer that reroutes all military comms in the area to one predetermined channel & is very proud of himself until he notices there is still a signal coming from Grievous & he’s like “Hey, wtf man, turn that off”

o  Grievous is like “BOY do I look-?? I can’t. Turn it off yourself if you are so clever.”

·     They try to be lowkey about shoving General goddamn Grievous in a surface vessel & getting him to their ship. (“Gooden riddance! Bigum Bot barely fitten in de bongo!”) They can only circle space awkwardly until the signal is cut. Because Dooku was definitely coming to pick up his dog.

We’ve Got a Runner

·     Grievous debated on whether he would rather deal with Dooku or deal with, ugh, Jedi. He’s already been thoroughly disgraced today. & Dooku was definitely getting flak from Sidious about losing his war machine to gungans. Grievous has a yolo-synapse misfire & tells Anakin about the firewall encryption.

·     Anakin is a huge nerd about it. He knows what it is & has been keeping up with whatever bits of public development he could find about this same encryption.

·     Kenobi calls & is like “What is happening, why did I get a call from Jar Jar that was just wailing in terror??” in the middle of Anakin hacking the world on this old fucking monitor bc he wasn’t about to hook Grievous up directly to their ship.

·     “Master! I don’t know why this smart-refrigerator gave you such a hard time. I caught him the first time out, with the gungan’s help! They gave us the blue bombs for getting rid of him.” Kenobi dies a little inside.

·     “But uh, the Count is coming with back up & I am trying to turn off the good general’s parental lock before he gets to us. You gotta meet us somewhere. Everything is under control but holy kriff make sure you guys have something to contain this thing- GOT IT okay bye!”

·     They go to land on some nearby little system just out of the way enough to not have tourists. Anakin reasoned that every time they tried to capture Grievous in space, one or more ships were totaled. Theoretically it would be safer to do it terrestrially? Especially with Padme on board.

·     Of course, as soon as their shuttle began skimming to park Grievous was like “bye”, kicked out the landing gear, & straight dropped himself out of a moving ship like a crackhead.

·     Kenobi & some of his 212th show up to help corral Grievous who, for a giant bone white cyborg, is moving very quickly through tall alien grasses like that Jurassic park scene. Even more Republic reinforcements show up led by Yoda & Windu. Plo & the wolfpack have brought Ahsoka & the 501’st arc troopers bc they would be damned to miss actually catching General Grievous.

·     In the ensuing skirmish Grievous:

o  Surprises & injures multiple jedi, killing one

o  Surprises, injures, & kills many clones

o  Gets various bits blown off of him under sustained LAAT gunship fire

o  Takes a rocket to the head seams, blasting off the end of his face plate & cracking it up the side

·     The wolf pack is finally like “We got this” & distract Grievous while Rex & Ahsoka arm & launch one of the Gungan EMPS directly on him.

·     Grievous, who was in the middle of moving, just kind of takes a dive. There is a dramatic pause. Fives is like “Hell yeah!” Grievous gets back up. Fives is like “Hell no!”

o  Grievous is still trying to leave kill crush destroy escape. Kenobi is like “pls. can u not just stop. Just stop for five minutes, I’m begging you general”

·     Plo Koon does a drive by in his starfighter, dropping the heaviest, probably illegal, electro-net he could get his claws on.

o  Grievous thinks “this mf just drop a net on me?” but the reason it is probably illegal in the Republic is that the weights at the edges start rumbling & G is like “oh”. The weights crash together at one point & catch one of Greivous’ feet in them.

·     After all that Scooby-doo level cat & mouse they finally manage to get Grievous more or less contained in on a Republic cruiser with a lot of industrial grade cable & a lot of jedi.

o  Imagine the awkward transport LAAT ride standing next to Grievous like the galaxy’s most pissed off lobster net.

The Medical Drama

·     After the cruiser hyper jumps tf out of there the cool kids of the Jedi Council (& maybe Ki-adi Mundi just so I can roast him for no reason) make it a point to gather in the room with the pissed off cyborg. Very scared clone troopers keep having to control his limbs. (Except Cody & Wolf, who have been waiting for this moment their whole lives)

·     It’s hard for them to stay in the room bc he is just radiating anguished rage into the force like a sun. He’s feral & fucked up looking from shenanigans. Pieces of him are twisted or missing, covered in blaster carbon. Half of one of his chest plates has been cleanly cut off diagonally by Yoda’s saber. He’s pissed off like a cornered animal & his body language reads as such.

·     They’re all just kind of standing there trying to look hard when Yoda steps forward. Grievous wrenches forward with all the psi his pistons have & snatches the little bastard off the floor in both/all hands.

·     Ahsoka hit him with another EMP from hell. The entire cruiser stalled. Ahsoka was like “My bad, I panicked.” All the lights died & were replaced with half a dozen lightsabers pointed at Grievous, still clutching Yoda with a death grip, as he convulsed, froze, & then jolted again. His eyes lost some edge somewhere in that full body reset protocol

·     Yoda wrapped his little gremlin hands around the edges of the back of his faceplate & is like “Super fucked up, you are. Tired, you are.” Grievous goes down. The cruiser powers back up.

·     Kenobi, whom is very perturbed by this entire situation, is like “How did you do that? You think we haven’t tried that? He never even flinched before. We couldn’t pierce the anger with any suggestions.”

·     Yoda troll shrug. “Disrupted perhaps, a mechanism was?”

·     Anakin is helpful, “He said the tracking chip was in his head case. If we can destroy it, the Separatist’s goons can’t get the tracker back online. Honestly… shouldn’t we just put him out of his misery?”

·     Half of the jedi are like “He do be fuckt up tho”. The rest are like “He has to have a trial or we forfeit our values”. But they all agreed he must have hella information. Anakin is suddenly urgent about it, realizing that if the Sith can wirelessly back access systems in Grievous they could potentially corrupt or wipe him.

·     What if he self-destructs? Is that a thing, holy shit?? We did not think this through. As usual. We have to remove his wireless access point (das a wap omg). Anakin is the best mechanic on this cruiser so he followed the procession of jedi & clones dragging 300 lbs of deadweight to the medical bay.

·     The medical bay, which was otherwise filled with the people Grievous had just injured & killed, was not thrilled. Nevertheless they would spare a very polite, very nervous medical droid.

·     Yoda, Windu, & Kenobi remained as well as Cody & Rex. They were concerned about the logistics of containing Grievous should he wake up. All the other logistics were also proving a challenge.

·     The general being propped up with more or less a pallet jack from cargo (much to the disdain of the head nurse) Anakin just sort of went for it. He’d opened up plenty of droids & speeders. Where would one fit a satellite tag on this thing? On the motherboard. Well where is everything plugged into on this?

·     Probably several paragraphs of Anakin (& perhaps the medical droid having a droid crush) admiring the design until he tentatively turns the module at center of either side of Grievous’ head like a volume dial & the rest of his faceplate pops off & clatters to the floor. Anakin pauses like a kid caught breaking something until he looks over at Obi-Wan.

·     Kenobi had picked the faceplate off the floor & was looking at what was left of the general’s organic face with that weathered concerned look he got on his face when he didn’t have time to unpack how upsetting something was. He did rhetorically mutter, “Oh, general, what did they do to you…” (🥺)

·     Anakin doesn’t really want to look. He’d spent this whole war thinking of Grievous as a giant battle droid. He’d just spent the last several minutes trying to puzzle off pieces of him while the medical droid’s arms flitted around them measuring & attaching things.

[To be continued. with disgust, will he wake up, & more body horror]

[feralaot]

somethin embarrassing the aot characters did that haunts them DAILY </3

I’m gonna slander these mfs

AOT characters + embarrassing things they did that haunt them

all I have to say is 💀💀💀

eren: in first grade he had a huge crush on this girl and he didn’t know how to handle it so he wrote her a letter that just said “get out of my school”

mikasa: middle school was the height of her goth moment (she’s still a goth just not as Severe) but it was to the point where she used to growl and snarl at people then quote twenty one pilots lyrics. it pains her to think about 

armin: one time he unironically had to look up “are rihanna and shakira the same person” and he hasn’t told anyone about it nor has he mentioned rihanna or shakira since out of fear that someone is somehow going to know how dumb he is

jean: when they were teenagers connie gave him a drink that he said was hard liquor and jean got shitfaced drunk, but then connie said it wasn’t an alcoholic drink and jean immediately snapped out of the placebo. connie lost his god damn mind and hasn’t let him forget about it

connie: during his first track meet in high school, the start gun went off twice, meaning that there is a false start and everybody should return to the line. but not him. he didn't know this and just ran like the wind, all around the track, haulin' ass, by himself.

sasha: she chipped a tooth when she was 15 while messing around with jean and connie outdoors and panickedly yelled at them “IS IT GONNA GROW BACK?”

historia: drunkenly blubbed and sobbed to a stranger about petty thieveries she had committed and felt bad about but lo and behold the stranger she yakked to was in fact a police officer

ymir: stayed the night at historia’s and they decided to go to the guest bedroom downstairs. well, little did either of them know that historia’s dad was already awake and was coming back up the stairs after getting a glass of water. here she was, half naked, at the top of the stairs, frozen, while her girlfriend’s father was, in his pjs, frozen, at the bottom of the stairs. they’ve never brought it up.

levi: went to a clothing store with hange and erwin one time but had an argument with hange on the way in. an employee greeted them at the door and his immediate response was “fuck off!” and erwin and hange haven’t let him forget it happened

erwin: came into work early, music blasting on his earbuds doing the footloose dance and did a swirl, turned around, and saw a full conference room of people just staring at him. he did not know there was an early meeting that day

hange: they had to go to a law firm for interviews about some generic job once. all went fairly well, the partner got up to open the door for them to leave. all this time later they still don’t know why, but the way he held out his arm when he opened the door suggested to hange that he wanted a hug. that went ‘round like fire.

reiner: spotted his ex one time at a store and wanted to avoid conversation at all costs so he did the logical thing and hid in a clothes rack. but, alas, he is a very large man so his ex could very clearly see him and reiner stared at him in horror when he stopped and looked down at the man huddled behind a bunch of shirts

bertholdt: took a baking class and his heart dropped in complete and utter dread when he realized that he was the only man there, not to mention he completely towered over everyone else and stood out like a flamingo in a crowd of ducks

annie: once she asked a woman if she was reading tolkien because she saw her reading a book half in english and half in “scribble writting”. it was Hebrew

porco: when he was a child someone told him that american and lesbian meant the same thing but nobody corrected him when he loudly declared “I’M A LESBIAN!”. he never saw some of the people who heard that ever again so there’s probably a few people out there who still think porco galliard is a lesbian

pieck: she has a habit of smacking porco’s ass as a greeting (don’t ask) and it became such a natural thing to her that she accidentally smacked reiner on the ass one time. she immediately realized what she did and felt her soul leave her body. they don’t talk about it

zeke: everything he does is embarrassing but the truth is he is rarely embarrassed because he has no shame although one time while walking out of a gas station he dropped his hot dog on the pavement then dropped to his knees and started hyperventilating

[uselesslesbiab]

How about hcs for the Phantom Thieves finding out Ren's been found out as their leader by like 9 people (one of which is an elementary schooler). I imagine they'd be cool with Sojiro knowing cause he's the group dad (no I will not accept otherwise) but they would not be cool about some of the others (especially if they find out some of the shit he's had to do for them).

Ooh I’ve had ideas about this for a long time and I wanted to write a full fic about it but I probably won’t any time soon. The idea was gonna be post interrogation scene Ren is forcibly put on bed rest so all his confidants come over to help him and the other phantom thieves out instead of Ren having to go see them. This might be a longer post so I guess I’ll separate the bullet points based on each phantom thief?? Just so I don’t forget anyone.

Morgana doesn’t get reactions for obvious reasons. Also this kinda turned into which confidants they would get along with the most oops. Mishima is also not mentioned since they all know that he knows and runs the Phan-site

Ryuji

His “For real?!” gets louder every time someone new walks in the door

He doesn’t really think it’s a big deal that these people know. If Ren trusts them, then he trusts them.

He’s super impressed by Shinya and they actually get along really well since Ryuji’s still a kid at heart. Shinya thinks his dyed hair and attitude is cool. (CEOs of cuffing their pants so high it looks ridiculous).

Chihaya scams him out of his money so fast it makes his head spin. Ren makes her give it back but his ego takes a beating.

Politics bore him to tears, but he likes the sound of Yoshida’s voice and the way he really listens to young people. “It’s like he totally gets us ya know? You’re alright old man!”

He has a nice talk with Kawakami where she apologizes for treating him like a troublemaker just because of what the other teachers said about him.

Ann

She’s extremely surprised and a little embarrassed that all these people know about them. “Ugh you’re worse at keeping this a secret than Ryuji!”

She starts complimenting Takemi’s goth fashion immediately and is totally in love with her style

She gets along well with Ohya too. The worlds of modeling and journalism are far from strangers, so they have a lot to talk about.

She gets along surprisingly well with Hifumi considering they’re almost polar opposites. Hifumi briefly mentions that she likes sweets and Ann invites her out for crepes on the spot.

Yusuke

Yusuke is disappointed in Ren of course and tells him as much, but he gets distracted before he can finish scolding him.

He’s absolutely fascinated by Chihaya and her fortune telling. He doesn’t have any money for her to take but she gives him a free reading anyway because he just looked so excited she couldn’t say no.

Yusuke and Hifumi really hit it off once they start talking about the phantom thieves and end up becoming good friends. She’s his first friend he’s ever made at school.

He calls Iwai a true artist when he sees his skill at making model guns. He demands to witness the entire crafting and detail process from start to finish. Iwai sees another kid with no parents and immediately goes into dad mode.

Makoto

Makoto isn’t angry, but she sure as hell isn’t happy either. As the strategist, she immediately recognizes and connects the confidants with the mementos targets that were troubling them.

She turns to Ren immediately and just goes “What in the hell is wrong with you”

After she gets over scolding him for being so reckless, she actually finds herself enjoying the company of Yoshida and Ohya especially

She talks to Yoshida and Ohya about her father and the injustice in the political system.

Makoto is really great with kids and Shinya kinda flocks over to her at some point and asks a bunch of questions about her role in the phantom thieves. Shooter arcade games are actually the only games she’s ever played, so they talk about Gun About strategy a lot.

Futaba

“Okay I got given so much much shit for letting Sojiro find out and Ren was doing this the whole time?!! You guys suck!”

She brags about her gaming skills to Shinya of course and challenges him to a Gun About competition.

Takemi sees her and immediately starts ranting off about how she needs to take care of her health and how her vitamin D is deficient and how she should get tested for this this and this and-

Futaba zones out but the feeling of having an adult female figure care about her well-being makes her smile.

Kawakami hears about her shut in nature and commits to tutoring her on the exact subjects she’ll need to know for the high school entrance exam. (Futaba may be incredibly smart but we all know the bullshit high school asks us to learn about. She doesn’t learn stuff she doesn’t have an interest in.)

Haru

Like Ryuji, she puts her faith in Ren and decides to trust these people.

She absolutely ADORES Iwai and his model guns. She fawns over their design and tries to pick up all the heaviest ones. He’s extremely flustered and thrown off at first because she’s this 5’2 tiny girl wearing a fluffy pink sweater and is rambling off facts she knows about all these guns.

Even so, Iwai is a dad at heart. The second he finds out she’s an orphan he practically adopts her on the spot. Haru is happy to finally have a male figure in her life that she can feel safe with and look up to.

She’s too smart to fall for Chihaya’s traps but she indulges in the fortune telling anyway. Only as a subtle way to give her some money.

[biglisbonnews]

Terri Joe Isn't Iconic, She's Psyiconic In 2022, TikTok found its unlikely host: a “devout Christian, Caucasian, heterosexual woman” by the name of Terri Joe. Even though Terri Joe found fame and notoriety on the platform, she was not too pleased with what she saw there. TikTok, after all, is overwhelmed by a constant flow of foolishness: Fleeting trends, trauma dumps, the whole world in synchronous and embarrassing choreo. Terri Joe was there to wake the TikTok community up from its sinful, silly slumber. Sitting coolly in front of her shabby floral wallpaper, adorned with not much more than a wig and a glare, Terri Joe goes on TikTok Live roughly between 10 PM and 2 AM CET, usually four days per week. Don’t worry if you miss it live, though. A dedicated community of stans watches every stream and posts all the best moments for posterity — highlights that largely consist of Terri Joe decrying the many “hommasexyuhs” (see: gays) who torment her. Clips from Terri Joe's Lives with Madonna, Doja Cat, Hunter Schafer and other celebrities have helped turn Terri Joe into a perennial meme and catch the eyes of everyone from Ziwe to Lizzo. But even as her brushes with the rich and famous have supercharged her ascent, it’s Terri Joe herself who’s the main attraction. Whether she’s talking to Bob The Drag Queen or a giddy normie, all who enter a Terri Joe Live receive the same treatment: a southern belle’s righteous flogging, interrupted only momentarily by the slight quiver of her lip before she finally breaks character. Keeling over to the corner of the screen, Terri Joe lets out one cathartic laugh before she returns to form. Related | Met Gal Behavior With Hal BaddieTerri Joe is no true preacher’s daughter. She spawns from the mind of Kelon, a shy, bubbly 27-year-old hailing from Houston. Kelon worked in tech before going viral on TikTok, but now he’s a full-time internet personality with more than a million followers on his main account @_psyiconic. And while Terri Joe is his most famous character, you can also find him on Live as Terri Joe's cousin Jeorgia Peach, an LA party girl perpetually blessed with a neon pink glow, or as her doppelganger Amethyst Jade, a goth girl vampire currently haunting Salem, Massachusetts.PAPER talked to Kelon about life before TikTok superstardom, the mechanics of the improv and the method behind the madness — one that appears to be refreshingly unmethodical. The “Terri-verse,” as fans have dubbed Terri Joe’s cinematic realm, is sprawling and complex, but it truly is created “on the fly.” In fact, Kelon doesn’t even think about the Lives during the day. When he goes on Live, he “blacks out” and lets the story flow. Nothing, not even the most absurd interaction, seems to faze him, let alone his interfacing with superstars.Which is probably why the whole thing proves so consistently thrilling. In an era overrun by hyper-strategic influencers and “content creators,” maybe the most genuine thing you can be is a person in a wig with a haphazard knowledge of the Gospel and an unflinching commitment to the bit.Welcome to the Terri-verse. Like our own, it’s ever-expanding.Describe the first time you went on TikTok Live. Were you in character?I have no clue. I started going Live while I was working for this little tech startup job and it was annoying as hell. So it came from me needing an outlet. It was something fun to do after I got out of work. And I'm not even that kind of person. It’s not in my personality to be happy on camera and be doing dumb stuff. Well, I guess it is now. But even right now, like [this Zoom interview] is awkward for me. Not because of you or anything. I just feel awkward because being on camera is weird. But when it's Terri, it’s different, because it's not me. So I really don't remember how I started going on Live. I just decided to do it and then it all snowballed from there. So did the Lives start with Terri? Did you already have the character developed? It wasn't really Terri per se. It was just me in a wig and clothes that I perceived as more feminine. And it was just me talking to people. I was talking in a normal voice and everything. But I never gave the person I was portraying a name until a little bit later. Did you know starting out that this character you were portraying would be a conservative Christian and homophobic?[Laughs] It actually didn’t start off with Terri, but with Jeorgia Peach. It started with that background and with me talking to random people and saying the most random things. And then one day I decided it would be funny to just throw on a grandma costume that I had and a raggedy wig and just go on Live. I think I was loosely basing it off of a character from my favorite TV show True Blood. So I was like, “Yeah, I'm a Christian.” And I think I just was randomly blurting out stuff like I usually do. And it just stuck.Did you ever know anyone in your real life who had those beliefs? No, literally no one in my life is like that. My parents and family members are religious and believe in God, but none of them are devout Christians. They don't go to church every day. I've never met a person like that actually, so I don’t even know where that came from. ​When you started going on Live, did you immediately know that this was something special and would take over your life? I don't even think I’ve even processed that to this day. I didn't expect anything. I never expect anything in life. But I didn’t think this would go as far as it did. I was just turning on the camera and being dumb and people loved it. And then they wanted more. And then they started supporting me financially to be able to do this full-time. That I would say is the biggest impact that this has had on my life. I don’t have to work a “real job,” which I hated. I hated working. So that was the most impactful thing that came from this. When you realized that this could be your professional work, did that change how you acted on live or thought about it? Did it make you more strategic?No. [Laughs] When I do interviews, I feel like people expect me to be more calculated with what I'm doing, but it's not like that. Everything happens on the fly. Everything is spontaneous. Nothing I ever did was thought out at all. It just happens. I think of it as like improv. And I think that's why people enjoy it. They like the unexpected.Terri Joe and all your characters have had some pretty dramatic storylines develop. Are those also spontaneous?Yeah, nothing is planned. I don’t even think about it at all during the day, because I usually go Live late at night. Even the kidnapping things or the stuff about Terri’s dad dying. Everything happens either on the spot or right before. Right before the Live I’m like, “What can I say when I start this live?"What about with some of the people who you go on live with often and have storylines with, like Tyler who Terri “dated” for some time, or Patty Puffs? Do you ever reach out to them offline?I do talk with the people I go on Live regularly with. They’re my friends. We have each other's numbers. We talk through DMs on Instagram, but we never talk about the Lives and say what we're gonna do. It just happens on the spot.Did you spend a lot of time online? Online wasn't even a thing when I was a kid. I spent most of my time watching TV like Disney Channel. I’m 27 years old, so I didn't get my first phone ‘til I was in the 12th grade. I was not really ever on the internet like that. I was really just sitting in front of the TV and watching Disney Channel most of the time, mostly That's So Raven, which I attribute to the things that I'm doing — like character work. [Raven Symoné] would do that all the time: play random characters and do the most random things.What was your life like before going viral?It was almost the same, to be honest. I don't really do extravagant things. Just like hanging with friends on days that I wasn't working. Getting drunk. Basically just doing the normal things that people do.The only difference is that I was actually working a normal job, which was excruciatingly painful for me. I mean it was fine, because the job was not even that hard. It was just driving around in a car, but it got very boring and tedious because you could only drive like 15 miles per hour. You couldn't look in any direction but forward. I was still going Live while having a job, but I noticed that I started getting [TikTok] “gifts” from people and the gifts could be transferred to cash. The money was like the same amount or more than I was making at my eight-hour job. So I was like, Why would I be working? I just quit the same day, no two-weeks notice. I was just like, “Okay, bye.” I took that leap of faith. And the gift money is very fickle. But I just trusted that it would work out. And it did. Were your friends and family surprised by this life pivot? I wouldn’t say they were surprised, because they've always been urging me and encouraging me to do social media things. I would always be like, “That would be so easy for me to do because I’m so likable and people love me.” [Laughs] I’m just kidding. I just felt like it would be like a fun thing to do. I would always be telling everybody growing up that I was gonna be famous one day. And then it happened. And I've said it so much that they were not shocked at all. They were more like, “Okay, you said you're gonna do it and you did it. And that's that.” They ask about it sometimes, but it's just like another job to them honestly. So you weren't an influencer before? Not really. No. I don't remember the last time I posted on Instagram. Like it was in 2016. And I rarely used any other apps. I watched people, but I never really posted, which is why I'm saying this, now, is so out of the ordinary for me. It’s interesting that you always knew you could be big on social media, even though you weren't really on social media yourself.It was more so famous. I wasn't saying I was gonna be a social media influencer at all. It was just that I was gonna be someone.Did you have a vision of who that person would be?No, actually. I just knew it would happen. Once, when I was in middle school, I had a substitute teacher. She was doing roll call and she stopped at my name. She paused and looked at me and she was like, “You're gonna be famous one day.” And I was like, “Okay?” Sometimes I think about that and I’m like, Was she psychic or something?I've always felt like that. I think most kids think, I want to be like an actor. I want to be on the Disney Channel. I want to be like all these other celebrities. I just had that in the back of my head. And I kind of manifested it.TikTok is where your work happens. But the clips are all over Twitter and the internet. Do you remember when you started realizing that your characters were having a life outside of TikTok? Yeah, I started getting texts from my cousins and other friends who were like, “Is this you?” They were sending me videos of me on Twitter. And I was like, “Wait, what?” I literally didn't even have a Twitter. I have Twitter now, but I don't ever use it because I really don't know how to use it.People would send me videos that were posted or reposted on there. And then people in the comments were like, “Who is this? Where can I find this person? This person is so funny.” And then I saw my Reddit, and all kinds of crazy things. I still don’t understand it, to be honest.Have you spent any time on your Reddit board?No, I'm scared. I don't even know what Reddit is. I didn't even have an account. One of my friends tells me what he sees on it. But I never looked at it for myself. I just made a Discord because my fans made a Discord [server] for me. And I was not in it for the longest time, but then I went in there and was just seeing what they were talking about, which actually is kind of a secret because I don't want them to know that I'm in it, but I am. You periodically get banned from TikTok. Do you understand why?I know exactly why. [Laughs] I mean, it makes sense. I'm never upset about it. I say the most outlandish things. I say very crude things and very sexual things all the time. So it makes a lot of sense that they ban me every time I go live. It comes with the territory. That's why I have like eight accounts. When I get banned, I just hop to the other accounts.You're such a staple of TikTok, though. You would think that TikTok would want to keep you happy. Has anyone from TikTok reached out? Yeah, I have a TikTok Live manager or point person. She works [at TikTok] and she talks to me about the Lives sometimes. But we never talked about me being exempt from being banned because it wouldn’t be fair. I do violate the community guidelines, and if they do it for me, they have to do it for other people, too. So I don't really mind.Your interviews with celebrities helped to bring your work to the wider world. What was the first one? And how did you start going on Live with more celebrities? I think Doja Cat was the first celebrity I went Live with. I was just on Live one night and that’s when I was literally having like 2,000 people on my Live. People were commenting, “Doja Cat is here!” And I was like, “Yeah, sure. And I'm Beyoncé.”I thought they were lying, but then I saw her commenting, and I was like, “Wait, what?” So then I just added her to the Live and when I added her, her following came to the Live and they were watching us interact with each other. And then she joined again a few more times. That's where it snowballed, because her following came to me and they enjoyed our interactions together. And then they posted it everywhere, and then others slowly saw it and were like, This person is funny. I want to go Live with him as well. Or that’s what I assume, because I don't really have any contact with any of them beforehand. They just show up and I add them.Were you nervous when you first got on camera with Doja Cat?Yeah, the first time I was, because I was like, Wait, this is literally Doja Cat and she's here. But I wanted her to have the experience that she was looking for, which was just going back and forth, the banter. I didn’t want to be like, “‘Oh my God Doja Cat!” the whole entire time and be annoying. And I honestly don't even see celebrities like that. I'm not a fanboy type of person. They're just people. I may like their music. I may like their work, but I'm not going to attack them. And I think they enjoy that aspect as well.Was there a celebrity who you had an especially good time with and you felt like really got it?Doja Cat. She just likes to talk. She says crazy things, too. The back-and-forth just works. I don't ever feel like there's a moment where I'm trying to force the conversation with her and force it to work, you know? It doesn't feel like work. It just flows. I was so gagged when Madonna did poppers on camera with you.Yeah. I thought that was so funny because I was like, “Wait, what?” I saw her while she was doing it and I was like, “Wait, are you literally doing poppers on Live like, what is this?” And the fact that she didn't get banned for that was hilarious. Yeah, that was amazing.One of my favorite things about the Terri character especially is it seems like she knows every lyric of every song ever. Is music really important to you?I wouldn't say that it's that important, but I do like music. If you notice, there's a running theme with what I say. I do enjoy things, but I don't really delve that far into it. I do enjoy music, but I think what people are intrigued by is the music that I'm singing. I'm interested in all kinds of music, almost every genre. So I feel like that's where people are like, “Wait, how do you know these random songs? It doesn't make sense.” But I've always been like that. I've always listened to the weirdest music. Or not weird, but eclectic.​You’re always singing Lana. It’s my favorite part of your Lives because it’s such a dramatic and funny juxtaposition with Terri, who’s usually more uptight. Are you not a real-life Lana stan then? Oh, yeah, for sure. With Lana, I know every single one of her songs and I know them all by heart. I was just playing a game with my friend where I guess the song they're playing when they’re shuffling through all of her discography. It was like two seconds of them playing a Lana song and I could guess which song it was. Yeah, I’m a really big fan of hers. But I'm not like a “stan” person. I don't even know when her new album will come out. But I know that she is coming out with another album, and I will be listening to it. But I'm not looking for it and searching for it.Do you dream of interviewing her? No. [Laughs] I want to, sure, but I'm not like, “I need that to happen.” Actually one of my followers is friends with her and she showed [Lana] my videos. And she was filming her. I don't remember what she said. I don't think she said anything. She was just laughing. But yeah, I would love to go Live with her one day if that was possible. But if it doesn't, that's fine as well. So you don't have a dream interview? You don't think about that? No.Most people you go Live with are just random people, and most of the interactions are pretty surreal. I was on one a few weeks ago where some guy kept asking to marry Jeorgia. Lately, I don't even remember. I just black out whenever I go Live. So people will tell me, “Oh, this one was so funny.” And I'm like, “That happened?” So nothing pops up in your mind from one of your Lives that is particularly crazy or memorable? Well, I do have one I just thought of right now, but it's not safe for work at all. But there was one time I went Live with this guy and he was wearing gym shorts and nothing under. And he was jumping around. I'm sure you can deduce what was happening while that was happening.Yeah, people can get pretty wild on your Lives. I guess they have an expectation of what the experience is going to be like, and they come in with a certain energy? Yeah, I think it's just that most of the people have never seen me before, but when I click to add their Lives, they can see how many people are in my Live. I think that's where that energy comes from. They’re like, “I have to be crazy. I have to get these people to like me. I have to have this be a funny or shocking thing.” I think that's where it comes from.Do you have an internal sense of how to keep things entertaining? Is there a signal that’s like, “Okay, it's time to move on or this isn't working?”It's only when I get bored. When I get bored from talking to a person, I'm just like, “Okay, bye,” and just go on to the next one. You can see it in the comments as well. People are like, “Next!” So I’ll be like, “Let's do a battle.” I'm like, “Want to do a battle?” and I just end the Live, because they think I'm going to press the button to do a battle, but I'm actually ending it with that. I feel like that's the least awkward way to end the Live. So now that's been a signal from the comments to me. They're like, “Battle! Battle!” But I don’t really listen to them most of the time. If I still want to talk to the person, I'm going to. But yeah, usually it’s when I get bored or when I see the comments and people are like, “Okay, we’re done. Let’s go to the next person.” Which actually pisses me off.Talk more about how you react to your viewers' comments during your Lives. It sounds like you follow their directives, but you also feel complicated about it?Sometimes it upsets me, because I’m just like, “Shut up and enjoy the show!” But most times when they’re like “This person is boring,” I’m like, “Yeah.” Usually, when they’re feeling it, I’m feeling it, too.Is there a certain trait in people you look for when you go on Live and know, “Okay this is going to be good?”It’s usually — and this is horrible to say — like older people. Like people in their 30s and above. They just really don’t understand what’s happening. They’re a little confused and I just play off them being confused and say the most outlandish things to them and try to get their reaction. The people I enjoy going on Live with the most are the people who have no clue what’s going on. They’re just going with it as if I’m a real Christian person who’s saying these things to them. I like their reaction to that.Okay, so you’ve built this whole Terri Joe Cinematic Universe — I don’t even think I built that. The people built that. I just gave them the material and they did the Terri-verse thing. I went along with it. I give them credit for that.But do you have active plans about where it’s going to go? Is your work going to expand off of TikTok? Are there any plans you can share? I would like to see it stay on TikTok but also expand, because something that is stagnant for a long time gets boring. I would like to see it travel further than that. I know some people have concerns about that. Like if you go to a network or a different platform, they’re going to try to dull everything down and ruin everything. But I personally wouldn’t work with anybody where I couldn’t have almost full creative control. That would be dumb. I’m already doing what I’m doing now, so I wouldn’t relinquish the reigns of what I’m doing to someone just for them to fuck it up. I would like to see it go somewhere else and I’ve been talking to some people about that, but there’s nothing definite. Is there a dream form for the characters? A TV show? Movie? Podcast? No. I feel like all of it! Why not all of it? I feel like I could transfer it to a lot of things, it’s just how. We haven’t figured that out yet.I want to put in my two cents for a club night somewhere hosted by Jeorgia. I mean, it would be fun. I’m just terrified to be Jeorgia anywhere because she’s like, “I have a BBL,” and I show up and I’m like [hunches his shoulders] built like Zoidberg. [Laughs] I guess that would be funny as well: for her to have all this surgery and then I show up looking crazy. I think that would be funny, but I don’t think people enjoy her as much as Terri. I know there are people who do, because people are always like, “Are you going to do Jeorgia tonight?” But I feel like there are more people who like Terri than the other characters. But I would do that because that does sound fun.Stand-up?I don’t think I could ever do stand-up. I think I would cry actually, because you have to set up jokes and nothing I ever do is set up. I don’t think I could even do that. Everything I do is on the fly. I never tried though, either. I think I have stage fright. I haven’t been on a stage in forever, but I’m pretty sure I have stage fright.​Are people recognizing you now on the street? Does that also make you nervous? It makes me a little nervous, especially if I feel like I don’t look how I should look in the moment. If somebody asks for a picture, I’m like, “Yeah, sure,” but in my head, I’m like, No! But people do recognize me and I always say, “Yes,” and I always try to give them the best experience or the experience they want from me. I think there are some people who are a little scared to come up and talk to me. They think I am how I am on the internet and will be rude to them, but I’m literally the complete opposite. I’m a very sweet and nice person if you meet me in person.Going off of that: Are there any big misconceptions you’d like to clear up about how you are as a person outside of these characters? That would be the main one. I think people know that now, but the biggest one is that they think I’m a horrible person or a rude person or a mean person or that I’d judge them if they came up to me, but I’m literally not like that at all.Terri Joe doesn’t exist in your mind?No. Not at all. I was literally like — wait I can’t say that. Wait I can! [Laughs] This interview is literally for PAPER and I was like, “I can’t talk about PAPER!” But [the PAPER team] was asking me to do these little videos here and there of me being Terri or saying something Terri would say, and I was like, “I don’t even know.” It’s just whenever this camera or this little setup is on and I have that wig on and I see myself in the camera, she takes over and I’m not even there anymore. I don’t even know what I talk about, to be honest. I think that’s the biggest misconception. The characters are not me and I am not them. They may be a piece of me, but I’m my own person.I feel like what you’ve done is really inspiring. You’ve made this whole thing happen and had so much fun doing it. Do you have any words for someone who wants to put themselves out there and perform and make art or comedy, but may be nervous to do so? I would say, “Just do it!” Me being Nike. [Laughs] Because most people want to do things. I’ve been saying I want to do stuff on social media for years, and the day I started doing it was the day it took off. People get in their heads about how it’s going to be perceived, but you need to not worry about that and just have fun with it. And the people who like it will come and the people who don’t like it can die. I’m just kidding! But just start and when you start, keep doing what you want to do. Don’t try to change what you’re doing to appease other people, because that will take the fun out of it away from you.Photography: Oscar OukStyling: Abby BencieHair: John NovotnyMakeup: Christyna KaySet design: Seamus SlatteryPhoto assistance: Alex KalbStylist assistance: Kelsey LoganProduction assistance: Em Marie Canon, Noelle Heriveaux, Gabrielle NarcisseEditor-in-chef: Justin MoranEditorial producer: Alyson Cox https://www.papermag.com/terri-joe-2659305290.html

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Does anyone else think the Chucky series is really ooc or is it just me?

I’ll be honest I haven’t watched any full episodes because I don’t have cable or a subscription option to watch the show and I haven’t had the time to actually find a bootleg website to watch it lol so I can’t say I know everything about the show lmao but yeah. I have watched LOTS of clips on YouTube so I know kinda what’s going on for the most part.

I just think that the characters (the old ones not the new of course lol) are really ooc to me. Like Chucky just wants to take over the world like an evil villain now? Okay then? You do you I guess? Andy, Kyle, Nica, and even Eddie in the flashbacks didn’t bother me though. They all seem pretty in character (also we don’t know anything about Eddie Caputo except that he was Chucky’s best friend and partner in crime in Child’s Play so we can assume he’s just as messed up and crazy as he is. So that’s why I’m not super bothered by his character. Also I’m glad we FINALLY got some background info on Chucky and how he met Eddie and Tiffany but anyways) but Tiffany, Glen, and Glenda’s characters really felt ooc and so did their relationships.

Like the twins don’t remember Chucky? And Tiffany told them he was a deadbeat who left them? (Okay well that I can understand because she was kinda pissed at Chucky at the end of Seed, but it seemed like they made up when Curse and Cult happened, y’know? But yeah Chucky loved his kids. He wasn’t the best dad ever, but he tried to get along with them and wanted what was best for them at the time just like Tiffany did). Anyways, like did they get amnesia or something because you’d think they’d remember everything that happened during Seed even after getting separate bodies and being human babies and all that? Like we’ve seen at the end of Seed that Glen still remembers their mom as Tiffany and their dad as Chucky after 8 years of being human. Glen even received Chucky’s arm as a gift for their 8th birthday and kept that picture of them and Chucky all those years. I mean, yeah that could’ve been some kinda supposed nightmare scene but even still that shows proof Glen remembered who their parents really were as a human, so y’know…that’s really weird that they just randomly forgot? I can understand Glenda not remembering much since they were kinda in the background of Glen’s mind, but would come out when wanting to commit violent acts. I mean, we even hear Glenda say they remember killing Joan in Seed of Chucky, but they think it’s some reoccurring nightmare/messed up memory. Like I said, I get that, Glen was mainly in control for most of the movie so that would make sense, Glen forgetting though, does NOT make sense. And you’d think if they did remember that they’d tell their sibling because they obviously are super close in the series (which is really awesome because even I assumed that the twins would have contrasting personalities and dislike each other lol) and tell each other everything. Oh also Chucky NEVER called Glen or Glenda “Shitface” that was Glen’s “name” given to them by that goth British “ventriloquist” (I think his name was Psychs?) before they actually got named by Chucky (and Tiffany). Chucky laughed at their name when they introduced themselves, but he NEVER called them that. In fact, he wanted to give Glen a name so he wouldn’t have to call his own kid “Shitface”. It was never an “affectionate nickname”. I think they just wanted to make a reference to Seed of Chucky by making another plot hole lmao.

Also the twins don’t know about Tiffany being a murderer or that she’s actually Tiffany and not Jennifer Tilly? She most likely still killed even while the kids were growing up and they probably would’ve noticed right? And yeah Tiffany was still acting like and being referred to as Jennifer Tilly since she took over her body, but she was still Tiffany y’know? She still had her Tiffany traits. And y’know Glen should remember that their mom’s name was Tiffany and their dad was Chucky and all that. I mean, Glenda watched Tiffany kill that nanny at her birthday party at the end of Seed and Glen’s whole deal was that they hated killing and violence while their parents killed people, you’d think they both would remember that right? Nope guess not, random amnesia for the twins for dramatic plot purposes I guess?

Also Tiffany’s toxic relationship with her kids is SO ooc for her! She’s such a horrible mom to them which is like a total 180 from the kind of mom she was in Seed. She was so kind and caring and affectionate and always tried to think of Glen’s (and Glenda’s) needs before her own even if that meant to stop doing what she loved (which was killing of course). I mean, yeah she had the whole thing about Glen being a girl and all that (of course that was a different time in 2004 so being non binary and queer wasn’t widely accepted yet) but other than that she was a really good mom to the twins even after they were born (as humans) and she always dreamed of settling down and having a family (she even felt that way in Bride of Chucky, wanting to marry Chucky and have kids with him). So why is she so awful now? Is it because her kids are grown now so she can act however she wants or something? Idk that’s just really weird to me that she’s like super selfish and not the sweet and loving mom she used to be.

The only other thing that bothers me is Tiffany’s relationship with Chucky. Like yeah we’ve seen in past movies that their relationship can be pretty toxic sometimes (or most times), but for the most part they adore each other and they’re basically soulmates lol. I mean Chucky eloped with her in Bride when he was acting like a total ass the whole time, that says something doesn’t it? He loves her and she’s just as crazy about him, they’re just mentally unhinged and psychos so they tend to argue and fight a lot (they also have big personalities too so they kinda clash sometimes). Idk I just miss Chucky and Tiffany being in love with each other like in Seed and Bride. I wish they’d bring that side of their relationship back because it was really nice to see and the fans love it tbh like Chiffany is A LOT of people’s OTP so I guess that says something too lol they’re like Bonnie and Clyde or I guess more like a Harley and Joker but less psychologically abusive lol

Oh also, Tiffany would NOT call the cops on Chucky the night he got murdered. That’s just not like her. She’s always been ride or die for him. I mean she even collected papers about his murders and him getting gunned down after he died. Maybe she was super guilty and started obsessing over him because she got him killed? Idk. Also wasn’t it Sarah that called the cops on him because he was holding her (and I guess Barbara when she wasn’t at daycare) captive and he was away getting her more sunflowers? Also that whole plot also feel just a tad ooc to me. So Chucky was cheating on Tiffany the whole time because he met a hot milf at a bbq? Idk that just doesn’t seem like Chucky. I mean he was out there trying to act like such a loving husband and family man to her when he despised the thought of marriage and kids for the longest time with Tiffany (y’know until it ended up happening anyways lol). That’s weird right? Is it because Tiffany’s just like him and he wants someone innocent like Sarah? I doubt it tbh. Also Eddie was there as a get away driver for Chucky the night he got shot so you’d think he just killed someone with him, y’know? Why would Eddie be there while he was hanging out with Sarah? Was he his ride or something? Because Chucky said he was gonna pick up Barbara from daycare, but Sarah told him to stay and the cops ended up coming (because Sarah most likely called them while Chucky was out). Now I did notice that Sarah was gagged and chained to the bed/couch/table thing she was laying on so maybe that’s why she supposedly didn’t call the cops, but it’s weird that the cops showed up THERE and that Sarah stalled him long enough for the cops to get there. Or did Tiffany know about him and Sarah and knew where he’d be? She was apparently pissed that he killed someone while she was at the store and she thought killing was “their thing” so it was practically like cheating on her, but there was never any mention of another woman he was cheating on her with, so yeah. Idk that whole plot is just so weird to me

Anyways, as you can see there’s lots of plot holes in this show (and pretty much in the newer movies too lol) that honestly made me not want to try and watch it now and the characters are just too ooc for my liking. Imma just stick with my version of the Ray family if you don’t mind lmaoooo