#so i achieved at least Something
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Reached the doctor's office on the 1st attempt today. Impressed.
They don't do covid vaccinations (:
#no of course not#why would they#it's completely irrelevant#who needs it anyway#i love life#it's absolutely amazing they don't offer vaccinations against covid anymore#i couldn't be more pleased#i'm not mad at it#it is fine#so very fine#i will not despair because of it#got an appointment for a blood test on Friday though#so i achieved at least Something#i will have to drive there myself for the first time#because no trains#probably will have to drive my mother to work and then to the doctor's office and then bring the car back to my mother's workplace#and walk home from there#because it's only like 2.5 kilometers but my mother has a lot of stuff to carry to bring to work#(and the weather is probably gonna be awful)#and the doctor's office is over 6 kilometers away which is not a distance i will comfortably walk#i mean i could#but I'd be stressed and annoyed and probably drenched when i arrive because it's probably gonna rain#it's an ✨️opportunity✨️ to practice my driving skills ♡#let's see it positively#void screams
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oops, still feral over pre-war Dead End Dratchet
(drift: you're rusting at every joint gasket: but isn't that doctor chummy with the cops? we're literal thieves??)
started with the headcanon that drift hung around the clinic like a feral wet cat for a while, then halfway through shading these, I started thinking, what if deadlock was an especially reliable assassin because he knew what kind of damage would make sure that even the best of the best couldn't bring you back
#couple million years later#ratchet is performing autopsies and very determinedly not thinking about teaching that one kid which energon lines are most volatile#you ever get this image in your head of a guy lurking around the guy who saved his life and then think#guess i need to design a clinic#but because your dumb brain needs context you think i guess i need to design the surroundings so you start a daytime wide shot too#and then an even dumber part of your brain is like let's do it all in that fake etching style that you haven't totally worked out yet#and then you also get sad about gasket so you stick him in too#they're done at least we achieved something aaaaaaa????#transformers idw#maccadam#tf drift#dratchet#tf ratchet#ratchet#gasket#drift#mtmte#my art
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"Unstoppable" by Donna Ashworth
#the promised neverland#tpn manga#tpn emma#tpn ray#rayemma#emma#ray#my edits#happy november 13th aka the day the kiddos crossed over to the human world and our fearless protagonist achieved her goal.#im so proud of her..& i didnt mean for this to turn into something so RE relatable but it just fits ya know? ray's been by her side the#entire journey so of course he would witness all her ups & downs. i dunno if he would indulge in poetry however but with all the#books in the GF & bunker library im sure he's at least come across his far share of poems over the years. so yeah. i sorta imagined him#writing all this down and sketching out his memories alongside it all. hopefully the panels convey that kind of look. who knows.
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not enough discussion about the gavins' complicated relationship with feminine-coded/beauty products, i don't think.
#for klavier because it's not as direct it's about how we never see him actually wearing lipstick? even though apollo literally attends#a concert of his which is where you'd most expect him to wear makeup. but apparently he just doesnt. or at least not in public#klavier gavin#kristoph gavin#i feel like there are several ways you can read into it. the misogyny/toxic masculinity one is really obvious clearly with kristoph's#singling out of men specifically and klavier's (probably accidental?) condescending manner of calling women 'fraulein' plus his general#mildly patronising attitude towards many of the women in the game (also probably unintentional)#(i think he's trying to be charming and it's coming off wrong to some of them. like ema. and me.)#but i feel like there's also maybe an element of... inherent perfecfionism to it? like both of these products are conventionally beautifyin#products and kristoph while he is open to showing people he uses nail polish specifically chooses one that's clear and missable unless you#see him apply it. he also feels the need to justify his use of it and specifically spell it out as something he chooses to do rather than#needs to do even though duh. that should be obvious.#idk there's just something about his seeming need to take control of that narrative that i find interesting. his need to spin it into a#'there's nothing wrong with my nails but I had the foresight to see that even the smallest parts of my appearance should be kept immaculate#and it's a choice i'm making to refine an already adequate part of my personage /not/ to cover some unsightly defect.' the need to emphasis#that specifically is so. hm. and with klavier i could see it being a case of him liking makeup liking the pops of colour yet being unwillin#to admit to it because he's afraid that other people might see it as him being dissatisfied with his own appearance regardless of if he is#or isn't. or even just perceiving colourful makeup as being unseemly because it's so overt and unnatural.#like i can see this as them both viewing 'real' beauty to be that which is inherent to a person and seemingly effortless#thus somehow negating the beauty which one achieves through cosmetics or other external means.#and if you want to use external means to achieve beauty or neatness or whatever then your only valid options are those which blend into you#natural state. like clear nail polish. or really awful spray tan.#i feel like klavier's less confined by these ideas (if they hold merit at all) considering he actually owns coloured lipstick and he wears#jewellery (admittedly quite 'masculine' jewellery no gems or pearls or anything like that but jewellery nonetheless) but i think it just#makes it more interesting that he doesnt seem quite able to cross the line anyway. like it's that ingrained into his system.#anyway that's all i've got. you guys should tell me what you think too#annotations
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"Because I am a doll with no heart..."
Before deciding to leave most of the silhouette flat, I started rendering out the full body - left it pretty loose and messy when I moved on but I still like parts of this version too!
#can't tell if I love or hate this composition lol but AT LEAST I MADE AND FINISHED SOMETHING#anyway ive had a MASSIVE rgu wip in the chamber for months now and it's not looking like that'll get finished any time soon so#we're gonna start with the achievable goal of Finishing One Drawing lol#rgu#anthy himemiya#fanart#siphisketches#my art#artists on tumblr#csp#id in alt#cw//#eyestrain#just in case lol
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Why did I just find my own art on tt
Like what?????
Not in a bad way but because the whole slideshow were movie pictures and then my fanart is there-
#percy weasley#oliver wood#perciver#i was so surprised#i fewl like i have achieve something at least
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Relationship envy except I envy the bond between iconic fictional characters Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson
#their relationship is so beautifully made#your honor they're everything to me#it doesnt even matter if you view them platonically or romantically#you cant deny the love they have for each other#the way that watson writes about holmes is just full of love and admiration#even though holmes doesnt express his feelings in the same way#he still loves him more than anything#as seen in 3GAR and DEVI#they both love each other so much#they both strengthen each other you see#they protect each other#they're a team#they each bring something unique to the table#but it doesnt feel like one is inferior to the other#at least not to me#traditional relationships always make me feel like someone is inferior/weaker than the other#holmes is smarter intellectually and he's stronger physically#but watson has the emotional intelligence#they balance each other perfectly#theyre PARTNERS in every sense of the word#and i want a relationship like theirs#i feel like traditional gender roles and stuff limit me from having a real relationship like this#as a girl#im expected to be weaker and softer#i mean even sherlock holmes says women are weaker#for gods sake#i feel like i will never achieve this level of equal partnership with a man#sherlock holmes#john watson#holmes/watson
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it's funny that not until i was flipping through reference material in the norton edition of the turn of the screw i got from the library did i make the connection that perhaps american literature's most famous ghost story was written by a guy whose brother was an active member of the society for psychical research
#i used to think william james was super famous bc he came up for me a lot in undergrad#but idk if that was due to a coincidence of classes i was taking#or bc he was affiliated with the university i was attending at the time#bc experiences sicne have taught me that he's not....#i mean i didn't think he was like freud or darwin but i would have placed him up there with... idk weber maybe?#anyway. he coined the phrase 'stream of consciousness'#and is credited according to wikipedia as first conceiving of the concept now referred to as neuroplasticity#(which i know bc seward identifies proving something VERY like neuroplasticity as one of van helsing's signature achievements#which caused me to look up the history of the concept lol)#and also he was p. into spiritual research and convinced of the authenticity of exactly one medium#i love the 19th century sorry i really do.....#also ok beloved is actually probably the most famous ghost story in american literature at this point#anyway i'n halfway through the book so far... p. good! spookier than i expected lol#bookblogging#turn of the screw#media 2k25#i'm sick but not too sick to spend at least some time reading instead of dicking around on reddit lol
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about ready
#pokemon#swsh#gym leader raihan#ft. flygon#had a vivid vision of this pose the other day and had to draw it. thats all thank you#I think after flygon's first appearance in anipoke whenever it comes up again the artists just go ''fuck it whatever''#and draw the legs however they want. it's basically a dinosaur in pmd#this is good for me bc I dont know shit abt fuck#flygon poses really well for how kinda awkward it looks on its own... but I also think abt like#duraludon being in the carwash. practically all the time its all I think about tbh#rest assured.#mim's infected me with the goggles vision I see raihan now I immediately wanna put a goggles on that man#they arent wrong tho. is the thing#is flygon an insect or a reptile.... the tail suggest something like a dragonfly but the neck doesnt seem to have#the shell structure that'd let it bend. thats at least skin#well. flygon is shapes. thats what it is. I enjoy it#I should sleep now... so many things happened today#I really gotta prep the fish tomorrow. dang. so many things on the list for tomorrow too...#have a good night lads. achieve flight
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me drawing this type of shit when my friend genuinely considers suicide because i dont know how to comfort people
#at least this made her laugh so thats an achievement#though i still need to do something WHAT DO I DO TO CONVINCE HER NOT TO KHS???#HELP ME.#`•oliviaisyappin#`•oliviaisdrawing#art
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elemental is a decent movie and also there's romance in it for some reason
#the movie is like. you can see clearly what theyre going for and they mostly achieve that#like the point of the movie is embers arc w her family and that is also the part that is most well done and makes the most sense#and then this. guy is here#and i get he's the development catalyst but oh my god ive never seen less chemistry even in a flattened out kids animated couple sorry#they need to be super weird bffs and im not joking#they start going off w the unearned I CANT LIVE WITHOUT U stuff and it's like huh. what. since when. hello. where am i#am i too aro for this movie or something. what happened#also introing a character as just sobbing nonstop is pretty iconic if only for how extremely little it gave me any sense of his character#but that's neither here nor there.#oh also: it touches on waterguys position of privilege without ever rly making him acknowledge it#like he is a ''good guy'' and uses his position to help ember out#but also only does that bc she was thrust in front of him and had the right sob story#but i guess it is a 1.5h kids movie so like. yknow#though i do like the at least attempted moral of like#get to know the people around you in ur community#even though i think waterguy shouldve been LEARNING THAT instead of just#Teaching that Lesson to someone who has to exist in an actively hostile environment 24/7
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clean 🦆🛀🫧
(part 2)
#digital art#artists on tumblr#illustrators on tumblr#original illustration#original art#sasha's art#i am very proud of this one#i have been having so many issues drawing since i moved#adjusting has been difficult and my self worth Plummeted horribly#so i have been having difficulties with staying creative and finding Value in my hobbies and such#so a while ago i decided to just go back to the basics and focus on highly technical drawings#that's how this one started too- it was a practice art based on a photo of our sink i took#and then i fell in love with it and worked on it until i perfected every aspect of it and i played around with colours until i achieved a-#-Mood i was finally satisfied with#sometimes being technical and going back to the basics can lead to something Bigger i guess!!#i love this series so much#i love falling in love with my art all over again#there is one (1) thing i have ever been good at and i am glad at least it shows
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to everyone (like, three people) wondering about how good ffxiv's cosmic exploration content is:
i spent 14 hours basically exclusively working towards upgrading my alchemist relic tool. during that time, i discovered for the first time how expert crafts worked and also was forced to do them while on a time limit, complete multiple on a time limit, complete absurdly stupidly, nearly triple the normal thresholds for quality & progress without expert craft bonuses, complete expert crafts WHILE ONLY HAVING 20 DURABILITY MAXIMUM, and also completely reorder my hotbars on controller in order to accommodate finally requiring crafting actions i literally never touched due to them being chance-based. my brain hurt multiple times whenever i did these in a row, and i'm still 2 steps away from having the relic tool for alchemist.
i recommend this content wholeheartedly to everyone who even has a passing interest in crafting. jesus fuck i have not had this much fun with this game in literal YEARS
#post-it note#ffxiv#cosmic exploration#i literally cannot wait to get all the achievements in this content#it's probably gonna take me until next expansion comes out but at least there's FINALLY a grind for me to work towards#i'm glad i finally have something to do in this game other than leveling alt jobs with frankly boring roulettes#the next job i'm doing is dancer and jesus...... that job is so boring#i cannot wait for future zones AND CRECENT ISLE IN A MONTH YIPPIE#DAWNTRAIL FINALLY HAS CONTENT FUCKERS IT ONLY TOOK NEARLY A YEAR
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OH MAN
So in RoT, there are beings that can become immortal through various means. Usually this is through a divine blessing or through a trial that marks you with a curse (e.g. vampirism, lycanthropy, etc.) but there's one group of people in the book who don't wish to be bound by either of those rules, so they make a potion of immortality.
However, the potion is incredibly painful to administer, similar to how getting a pneumonia or rabies shot hurts like hell. It works similarly to how cryogenic substances work and is essentially a whombo combo of antifreeze, liquid nitrogen, & stem cells.
How is this relevant? Because this group of people have the formula under lock and key, and despite not being bodily prepared for it like the other races that have immortality traits, they use the potion anyway as a means of keeping control in the country they're in. This potion can be used to coerce others to join their cause, should the offer prove beneficial.
Because what's better than saving the ones you love if you can, right?
#exe talkz#on writing#RoT#rotating this concept with my mind because medical immortality is fascinating esp since I have a lot of immortal characters#Immortality is something I like to think about a lot because it's not something everyone can handle#for some it's a curse - for others a blessing - it's a means of taking control of their lives so they never die#and for a very small few (gods usually) it's just how they are meant to be#'would you want to live forever' is something I think everyone has asked at least once in their lives but really thinking about it is...#where the interesting part comes from - because it almost shows where one's ego is at#the one thing consistent I've found with characters that are immortal is that they have to keep doing new things - or else they'll go mad#the point of the medical means is that it's people trying to achieve something they were never going to be prepared for...#and the morality of it all can make or break you depending on your state of mind#Can you tell I've thought about this a lot lol
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i am never forgiving gamefreak/tpc for making nemona from another region *just because*. like can you imagine adding to your game the perfect andalusian representation, with zero negative stereotypes and making her actually someone you aspire to be, someone competent both in battle and at school, someone that is good not because of mere talent but because she works hard to become better (she tells you this!!!), a character that's more than the funny sidekick, a character that both exudes personality without seeming dumb or uneducated... and you change her nationality at the last fucking second.
#pokemon#pokemon sv#pokemon scarvio#when i started my playthrough i was so excited!#a southerner whose role is something beyond “the stupid but funny sidekick who speaks with a rural accent”#she was clever! she did good in school! she's one of the best trainers in paldea and even the champion recognizes her as her equal!#she's someone that admires you but also someone you're expected to admire!#and all her achievements are because she works hard!#and then. “nah she's not from paldea even lmao”#“be happy you at least have ONE (1) main character from this gen's region lol”#“which coincidentally is the one that does poorer in school and someone that considers himself a mediocre battler xD”#“and whose main traits is that he's not very bright and loves food lmfao”#is like. waow. what a nice way to ruin everything just by adding one (1) piece of information about her that added *nothing* to the game#that must be a record
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🌧️
#I’ll leave for a bit#just a bit. hopefully#I’ve been making myself so upset about so many things lately#that it resulted in an anxiety attack earlier today which I hadn't had in so long#I can't really distance myself from any of the stressors except for tumblr right now so this post is mostly me telling myself to stay off#at least until jk's bday or something#the self-pressuring and sense of failure has become too much#it's not a balance anymore rn it's just one more thing that's making me feel incompetent and desperate#I should put the little energy I have into my two jobs and the thesis#I could really need a small achievement with writing the coming days. to lift my spirits again#I hope a little break will help with that#and I’m sorry that I've been so miserable on here lately....it's not an easy time rn
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