#so eye opening! im learning a lot about myself and style in the process

[xwbn]

100% :> I’m all ears -🪷

! well okay :)

[tianhai03]

Hi! I was curious about your study methods for anatomy/fabric folds? What are some resources you learned from, and other artists you've looked to for inspiration/guidance? Would you be open to doing personal, non-public critiques? I love the composition of your pieces and want to learn more!

hi uhhh i am very sorry to break it to you but i rarely ever do studies that isnt just. character/facial structure studies LMAOOO i used to do anatomy studies but not as much anymore and ive never done fabric fold studies. unless you count "staring at ppl respectfully on the train/video game characters from AAA games for a long time just to figure out how certain things work" as studies i dont actually do a lot of them very often.

^ an example of facial studies ive done awhile ago of my two favorite capcom guys. i took one screenshot of them each and painted them. it helps a lot to get better at drawing them (and faces in general) bc i have to be aware of what makes them look like them; the shapes of their faces, eyes, noses, mouth, eyebrows etc etc. while realism isnt really everyone's cup of tea, it isnt mine's either, but this genuinely helps a lot. it should work with other stuff like anatomy and fabric folds. i recommend trying figure sketching too if that's something you can manage.

as for resources... i dont look at a lot of those if im being honest. i just kinda look at drawing tutorials i see on twitter or here, whenever ppl put them on my tl/dashboard. but i do suggest looking at this person's profile (@/MangaMaterials2 on twitter) if you have the time, they make a lot of anatomy tutorials. i also watch this person's speedpaints (@/remarin on youtube) very often. i actually learned my shading style from watching them, and they're also very good at anatomy.

for non-public critiques, im sorry but i cant help you with that. im very busy myself and during weekdays im not home with my drawing tablet for most of the day, and that makes it very difficult for me to help anyone with critiques. im also not that good at explaining things, especially when it comes to how i draw (because i just. kinda know how to do things subconsciously? i dont actively think abt what im doing when i draw so i dont know how to describe my process). you're better off finding someone who's better at teaching :')

thank you for your kind words!! hopefully these are helpful to you!

[doubledyke]

hey, i’ve read some of your writing and i really like it. do you have any tips?

aw dude that's really sweet. i'm really self conscious about everything i write so i appreciate hearing that. i'm still learning myself, so my advice is probably gonna be kind of obvious yet nebulous (much like my writing). oh and im not great at following my own advice, but we can ignore that.

first and foremost i'd say try to have fun. get weird with it. don't stress too much about it. it's supposed to be an enjoyable pastime, so write what YOU like, how you like. the "rules" of grammar and composition are helpful, but you're allowed to be a lot more lax with creative writing. i know i am 👀

in my humble opinion, you can never have too many details, even- or especially- oddly specific ones. personal experiences are a great way to inject some minutiae, and i enjoy the insight they provide into the author's perspective, background, thought process, etc.. there are infinite other tools at your disposal too. like the number of times i've found myself browsing ancient, niche forums just to confirm one insignificant bit of information is ridiculous.

don't be afraid to take your story as seriously or unseriously as you want. sometimes i'll be snapped out of focus with the thought of "am i really writing this rn" 😂 but i just try to remind myself that i'm (usually) having fun, i'm not hurting anyone and someone might even enjoy the final product.

for eene, try to listen to the voice acting as much as you watch the animation. and don't be afraid to step outside your comfort zone when writing a character. i'm neither comfortable, nor very good at writing for ed, but i nutted up and gave it a shot recently and yeah it's nuclear level cringe but i suppose it can't get any worse, right? RIGHT???.... i love learning new words, so when i'm writing for edd (and in general) you know i keep that thesaurus tab open. with eddy, there's always room for more irreverence. i'm also one of those people that cannot help but drop almost every g when i write eddy. and it's just as important to get their idiolects down, which can be tricky. BUT that's mostly if your goal is to stay close to the source material, which is definitely not necessary. i'm just not a very creative person 😂

if you're in a rut, skip to another section, or hell even another chapter. the fic i'm working on rn was hatched from a simple premise several months ago, so i started at the end and have been building on that. an unconventional starting point can be really helpful when you're struggling to start at all. because i'm me, it's turned into a nightmare beast that i can't seem to contain, but i still have a general idea of where we're going and we'll get there eventually lmfao. to that point, outlines, bullet points, notes, etc. are all very useful.

take breaks, let her sit for a while. i'll write a whole bunch, leave, come back to review and be like girl what the hell is this. fresh eyes make a big difference! however, don't be like me and get too caught up in the weeds. i make compulsive little tweaks of my shit up to the point and even after i hit post. more often than not, it's more stress than it's worth. i just can't help it 🥴

and then of course, read other people's stuff. i'm not much of a fiction reader but i make exceptions for the sake of my hyper-fixation. it truly does help to see different perspectives and styles of writing. everyone has a unique voice that really comes through in creative writing, which i love. i've gleaned a lot from reading other people's work as well. i frequently come across new and creative ideas for changing up sentence structure, dialogue tags and narration by reading stuff from fellow fans.

aaaaaand yeah idk what else really. like i said, i'm not the best at writing but i think as long as you're getting your ideas across in the way that you want to, you're golden. anyone who makes shitty remarks about someone else's writing can sit and spin honestly.

[ransprang]

AAHHH HI I never really do this type of stuff bc I’m shy but hello! I was wondering if I could request an arcane match up? I’m demi-sexual/bi-romantic and I’m afab and currently use she/her pronouns… But I’ve been… thinking about testing out she/they… quite a lot… (but that’s not an issue, it’s an ish-me🤪)

My main love language is quality time, but I also like physical touch and acts of service. Uhhhhh my type? I guess I like people with a good sense of humour, who are passionate, and a little on the nerdy side 😁

I’m a big arts kid - I’m currently in school for theatre but I also danced for most of my life, I sing, I write, and I really enjoy painting! I also taught myself ukulele and I’m in the process of teaching myself guitar! But I also really enjoy logic puzzles and philosophical thought experiments, as well as learning about history and science! Some other hobbies of mine include playing dungeons and dragons (currently learning how to DM), playing *laid back* video-games (stardew valley, minecraft, etc.), reading, &listening to all kinds of music

It’s hard for me to think of anything I hate. other than like… Rude people? Bigotry? Existential dread? Global warming!? You know… Typical things.

I’ll keep appearance stuff brief: I’m about 5’6”, I have blue eyes&Auburn-y hair that’s a little past my shoulders (& bangs!) I have glasses but I don’t wear them as much as I probably should… (whoops) My clothing style is as eclectic as my music taste, but on my days off I can be found in comfy clothes with a blanket draped around my shoulders. I have a connective tissue disorder and chronic pain so I have to be careful with physical activity/sometimes have to wear wraps to help my joints, but usually I keep them under my clothes so I don’t worry people. My MBTI is INFP, and Im a virgo sun, pisces moon, scorpio rising (pretty good at reading people’s emotions but always nervous that I’m the root cause of their bad feelings bc my self-critical anxiety brain is mean like that). I’m pretty open about how I feel around people I’m comfortable near, although I hate crying in front of other people (I cry quite often too WHOOPS). I’m generally a pretty open/honest person, but with that I tend to trust people a little too easily and it has bitten me in the butt in the past… But it is what it is! I try to remain optimistic in most situations, and I’m a bit of a dreamer, but I also try to remain grounded in realism, so… A lot of my personality is a balancing act I guess!

Thank y’all so much, and I hope y’all are well! & Happy Holidays:)

heyyy happy holidays!! you sound really rad! hope you like your match up

your arcane match up is..........JAYCE!!

- Jayce is a busy man but he would have all the time for cuddling and kisses :3

- Jayce would fully and excitedly join your DnD games. He would also drag along Viktor and Mel. Mel would wreck your game hardcore but it might be a good learning experience as a DM!

- Jayce is nerdy and smart so he’d totally be able to compete with you in chess. You could also get him into minecraft since it's full of various elements and he's a science nerd.

- Since physical activity is a bit rough for you Jayce could pick you up and run around with his strong blacksmith muscles

yours dungeons,

admin san & sar

[harrysgoldenline]

Birth Anxiety

“Up we go.” Harry chuckles, gripping his wife’s hands and helping her up from the yoga mat, her large belly bumping into his making him chuckle, “this was a good one, yeah? Felt like I learned a lot.”

“Me too.” The girl nodded, one hand resting along her stomach as the other intertwined with his, thanking the instructor before they left the building, soon entering the warm car.

Harry and Y/N have been attending birthing classes now that she was seven and a half months, knowing they will never feel fully prepared but just wanting to feel a little more ready.

Y/N has always known and dreamt of having children, but now she was pregnant and about to give birth and it was all she could think about.

She was terrified.

The couple had been reading all of the books, attending classes, watching educational videos, doing their research and asking their doctor every single question that has ever passed through them. She knew what to expect and she knew how to prepare. But she has never felt more scared in her life.

She looked over at her husband, seeing him sing along to the radio with a smile, it growing when he caught her staring and getting impossibly bigger as he glanced down at her stomach.

Harry was ecstatic, already so in love with their baby boy. He also has always known he wanted kids and he felt ready, granted he wasn’t the one pushing it out. Of course he was a normal person, feeling the occasional doubt and worry about not being a good parent but he knew with Y/N by his side he could do anything.

Y/N just didn’t know if she could do it. Of course everyone has always called her a natural after seeing her babysit or playing with her nieces and nephews but this was going to be so different. Not just a few hours or a few days, this was forever.

And she had to push it out of her.

That was something that also weighed heavy on her mind, hearing all the horror stories of the ripping, tearing and excruciatingly endless hours of labor... she just truly believed she won’t be able to do it.

Soon, the Styles family returned home, Y/N wobbling close behind Harry after he open her door from her, helping her out of the car (her tummy made it quite hard for her to move around).

“What you wanna do now, my love?” He smiles, leaning on the counter and staring at her proudly, “I’ve got nothing planned except loving on you.”

“You’re awfully cheesy today.” His wife softly smiled, hobbling her way over to the couch and sitting down, quickly putting her feet up and resting both hands on her stomach, “can we watch movies?”

“Of course we can.” He smiles sweetly, “want me to get you or the little bugger some snacks?”

Y/N nodded quickly, explaining what she was craving which Harry happily created for her, soon arriving into the living room and giving her the plate and a kiss on the cheek and stomach.

They soon selected a movie, the lovers cuddling close together as they both watched it peacefully. Harry had one arm around her shoulder and the other resting on her tummy, gasping quietly every single time he felt a soft kick. He had never felt so happy.

Unfortunately, much to Y/N’s surprise, this movie had a birth scene, making her breathing stutter as they showed the actress cry out as she laid on the hospital bed.

“Are you okay?” Harry quickly asks, sensing her off breathing, “Are you in pain?”

She shakes her head as the tears start rolling down her face, her hormones making her break within an instant. Harry instantly turned the TV off and slid off the couch, kneeling before her. The man gently reached up and softly taking her hands and pulling them away from her face, pressing soft kisses on them.

“Talk to me.” He begged, “I want to help, please tell me what I can do.”

She shook her head faster, breathing picking up as panic filled her, every possible thing that could go wrong flashing through her, sobs racking through the pregnant woman’s body.

“Baby, please.” Harry choked out,”you gotta breathe, okay? Take some deep breathes, I’m not going anywhere. We gotta breathe.”

Harry absolutely loved pregnant Y/N, except times like this. He hated seeing how much her extreme changing hormones affected, the girl breaking down over the smallest things and struggling to feel better.

Something he hated even more, was all of the pains he went through. The morning sickness, the too rough kicks and all off the other turmoil her body has been going through. Harry wanted so desperately to be able to take it away and put some it on himself, seeing the love of his life going through such a hardship for their child while he wasn’t experience any of it. It tore him apart seeing her cry.

“I can’t do it, Harry.” She cried, desperately clawing at his shirt as she tried to get him closer, but getting more and more frustrated as her belly gets in the way, causing her to cry more, “Im so scared, I-I can’t do it! I can’t! It’s gonna hurt so badly and birth class today just made realize I really can’t do it!

“Yes you can, if anyone in the world can... it’s you.” He whispered, leaning his forehead against his and pressing a soft kiss on her nose, “you are the strongest person I’ve ever met. I wish I could take it all away and give all of the pain to myself.”

The girl sniffled, pulling Harry onto the couch and cuddling into him the best she could, “What if I’m not strong enough?” She squeaked, “what if I can’t do it? What... what if something bad happens to me o-or the baby?”

“Nothing is going to happen.” He whispered, “I’ll make sure of that.”

“I just-“ She whispered, “I wanna be a good mom and I’m so scared I’m not gonna be, isn’t it a bad sign if I’m that scared of j-just having him?”

His heart melted as she looked up at him, her big eyes he fell in loved with filled with worried tears. He softly gripped her face, pressing their lips together gently. Harry had been her absolute rock since they’ve been together, but neither of them had any idea it was possible for them to grow even close when she got pregnant.

Y/N has always been the type to hold back, keep in her emotions to herself for a while before sharing if she ever did. The husband and wife were both very private people, but Harry was much better at sharing his emotions, something Y/N’s been working on, but has gotten much better since the pregnancy.

Harry just made her feel safe, she knew he could tell him anything and he would never judge her, he would always be there for her and never make her feel stupid for anyway she’s feeling, always telling her to never apologize for her emotions. She truly looked at him like he hung the sun, moon and stars.

“You, my love, will be the best mother in the world. There is nothing wrong with being afraid... I’m afraid too.” He explained, Y/N’s eyes shooting up at his confession, “Were gonna learn what this little guy likes and doesn’t like but we’ll figure it out.”

Y/N nodded, smiling softly as Harry lays back on the couch and pulls the girl into his lap, her back pressing against his chest and his arms go around her, his and her hands resting on her stomach.

“And as for the birth process” he slowly began, “I’m never gonna leave your side, gonna give you my hand to squeeze and break if you need. Birth is a big thing, of course it’s normal to be nervous. You’re gonna be a fighter, the best mum ever.”

As soon as Harry finished talking, they both the strong kick of their son, the both of them softly smiling and Harry presses soft kisses onto her shoulder.

“I think the little one agrees.”

[inosuketingz]

the sheets are stained with blood [p.4]

PART ONE PART TWO PART THREE [ PART FOUR ] Victor Zsasz x fem!Reader Warning: language, violence, blood and BOP spoilers Word Count: 1687 Tag: @itsknife2meetu @yourlocalghoul​ @im-just-one-of-the-avengers​ @fillechatoyante​ A/N: im sososoosossososos sorry this took so damn long I promise u guys my reasoning wasn’t too bad, i just got busy with school and then right after became really unmotivated w/ the blm movement. as a black woman, it has always affected me a lot and i really couldn’t stop stressing over it for weeks. of course im still stressed over the protests and stuff, but i did want to get back to writing. if it makes you guys feel any better, you guys are getting your guts rearranged in the next part.

“Holy shit!” You yell the minute the quarrel crashes into he window. It lands only inches away from your face, too short to reach it. And whoever shot the arrow knows that. They aren’t trying to kill you. They only want your attention.

 “Since when did Hyunwoo have shooters?” You ask. For the most part, you know Hyunwoo was a very independent person when it came to the shady business he dabbled in. He was never the type to have any guard dogs.

 Victor shakes his head, forcing his car door open at a frantic speed. “They’re not with him.” 

 You narrow your eyes, searching for anything in the distance. There’s a flash of purple within the trees next to Hyunwoo’s house and you look over to Zsasz. He’s standing in the open, a grim look on his face.

 “Zsasz, get back in the fucking car before you get shot in the forehead!” You bark your order. 

 “Don’t tell me what to do,” he replies and you sigh in annoyance, slamming your head back into your seat’s headrest. Dealing with him was like dealing with a four year old. You reach into your pocket for the Blood Pendant. If he won’t do what you say voluntarily, you’ll just have to force him. But, when you dig through the fabric, you realize it’s gone.

 You glance toward him and see the silver chain hanging out of the back pocket of his cargo pants. That sneaky asshole.  You didn’t even notice when he managed to snag it off you.

 “Victor Zsasz!” A feminine voice calls out. It echoes around you and you have no clue where to look. You slip out of the car, mentally readying yourself for any of the spells you can conjure. 

 Zsasz looks even angrier now, his face is painted red with fury. 

“Get back in the car!” You try to advise him. You have no clue why you’re so concerned with his safety.

 “No, I want to kill these bitches by myself.” He pulls his token knife from his pocket, the one you’ve seen referenced all over the news with his murders.

 As he toys with the sharp edge of the blade, you sigh. “No offense, but I don’t think your tiny ass knife stands a chance against a bitch with a crossbow.”

 Behind you two, there is a soft crunch of leaves as someone takes a step closer. Like partners in a waltz, you and Victor whirl around. His grip on the knife’s handle grows tighter and you can feel your power tingling at your fingertips.

 “Hi, Zsasz.” The two of you face a young black woman, her blonde hair styled in loose locs. You can’t help but notice how pretty she is, despite the cocky grin on her face indicating she wouldn’t hesitate knocking the both of you out cold. “Since when did you start working with the Night Hex?”

 “We’re not working together,” You shoot back. “Which is why I think it’s in our best interest that I leave, and let you two hash it out.” You begin to take a step back, ready to bolt out of sigh, when you feel a cold metal against your neck. It’s something sharp, and you hiss as it slightly stabs into your skin.

 “Yeah I don’t think so,” A feminine voice behind you says. You look over your shoulder and see her standing there with a crossbow in her hand. She nudges the crossbow closer to your face and you flinch back. “Consider yourself guilty by association.”

 Another woman approaches you and you roll your eyes. “God, there’s more of you?” 

 “Yes. And it looks like you guys are outnumbered.”   She mocks you, her inner-city accent evident.

 Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fucking fuck. These are those Birds of Prey chicks aren’t they? And you remember hearing somebody say they had something to do with Roman Sionis’s death. That’s why Victor looks so pissed. 

 This isn’t fair. You came to Gotham to relax, and stir away from any of those fuckers in spandex that swear they’re vigilanties. But of course the second you decide to make some hard-earned money, you suddenly have these little birds on your ass. 

 The one with the crossbow sidewalks to stand in front of the pair of you and turns slightly to aim the weapon at Zsasz. “You’re supposed to be dead,” she tells him flatly. The other two birds step back, seemingly to let her at him. Your mind flashes back to the ugly scar on Victor’s neck. It’s shaped perfectly for a crossbow. Whatever Victor had with these women, it seems to be about more than just his dead boyfriend. “You’re supposed to be dead, like the rest of those sons of bitches,” she insists. Her voice cracks as she says this, and her eyes grow wet.

 “And yet, I’m not.” Zsasz practically growls. The words came from deep within his chest. His rough hands twirl the knife between his fingers, anticipating what is to come.

 The air is thick with tension, and you are standing in the midst of it all. Times like this are when you especially become grateful for your witchcraft. 

 A beat passes before Zsasz lashes. He raises the knife, aiming for her face. It’s almost like time slows down for you as you notice the woman’s finger reach for the trigger. You rush to latch onto Victor’s empty hand and close your eyes, picturing your small apartment in as vivid detail as possible. You whisper in Hebrew a teleportation spell you learned in Israel that translates to “Bring me there.” 

 It hardly ever works. Time after time you’ve tried to disappear mid-fight with Wonder Woman, only for you to remain where you are and get her fist in your face. The fact that you’re trying to do it with two people is insane, and you would’ve called yourself an idiot for even considering it any other time. However, for some odd reason, you can’t fathom this encounter ending with a bow down Victor’s throat.

 You’re not sure if you managed it or not until you hear Victor mutter “What the fuck?” and you hear the hum from your studio’s A/C kicking on. You let out an audible sigh of relief and let go of Zsasz’s hand. Your moment of relaxation is cut short when he shoves his hard hands against your shoulders, causing you to stumble back. Out of instinct, you step forward and swing your fist at him, but he ducks back.

 “What the fuck did you do!?” He yells so loud that you’re sure the entire floor hears him. “I was going to fucking kill her! Are you stupid?” 

 It takes you a minute to process his words. You just saved his life and he has the nerve to be mad at you? “Are you stupid?” You echo, your voice even louder than his. “She was holding a fucking crossbow, dumbass! She would have killed you long before you could even lay a hand on her! You should be thanking me, you piece of shit!” 

 He brings his knife to your neck and you clench your teeth, expecting him to bark some new insults your way. Instead, he swallows down and digs his hand into your pocket to take out the keys. “I’m taking these to Hernando myself. Do whatever the fuck you want.” And with that, he turns to the door to leave.

 But you’re not going to let this argument go down so easily. With his back now turned to you, you push him, and he stumbles a bit. “And when you’re done with that, leave me the fuck alone! Stay as far away from me as possible, and deal with the bounty the Birds of Prey have on you by yourself!”

 He stares at you from over his shoulder as you wait for an answer. Adrenaline rushes through your veins as you hype yourself up for a fight with him, but Zsasz already looks like he’s calmed down. “Go drink some water, you look like you’re gonna pop a vein.” And then he turns and leaves. 

 Your face twists as your door slams shuts, the million words you wanted to throw at him still tingling at your tongue.

~~~

 Hot water hits your back and you yawn. It took you an hour to finally calm down, but when you did you ordered some pizza and watched TV for the rest of the day. You aren’t too sure how long Hernando wants you to work on this expedition with him, but when it’s all over you’ve decided you're ditching Gotham. 

 The first few months here have been peaceful, sure, but too many dangerous people know that you’re here. Your little vacation spot has been ruined. So, you’ll probably head somewhere else, like Orlando or Los Angeles. Maybe you’d move to a small town without any crime-fighting heroes, and live out your Hallmark-movie romantic fantasy after all.  

 Whichever it’ll be, you’re sure it’s not anywhere near this city. Or Boston, either. 

 You scrub your body with a soapy loofah to make sure all the dirt is off your body. After a few more minutes you finally turn the water off and pull a towel over your body. Something about Victor Zsasz drains the energy out of you. After all your encounters with him, you remember always feeling beyond tired by the end of it. 

 Whatever it is, it’ll be gone once you leave Gotham.

 You lotion yourself and apply your facial creams, pulling on your panties and an oversized shirt you sleep in in the process, all before slipping into your bedroom. 

 Your room is oddly quiet, the hum of the TV you normally keep on muted and your fan turned off. You flip on the light switch and freeze at the sight before you.

 Victor Zsasz waits for you at the end of your bed. The sheets are stained with blood and you can practically smell the reek of death coming from him. He looks at you with those fake innocent eyes as he says a soft, “Hey.”

[thereallinksstuff]

Uhm here's my first fic in like 8 years, I hope it isn't to bad.

Fandom : sander sides ,

Pairings: intrulogical, background royality hint of anxciet

Words: idk fahm

He felt the familiar tug of Thomas summoning them, he sighed in annoyance at being disturbed.

He popped up just like any other day he was summoned only this time everyone was staring at him. "Why are you all looking at me as though my head has turned into Barneys armpit?" 

"Uh....Nice outfit logan" Virgil managed through his suprise at logan not being in his normal tie and black polo.

Looking around the room at everyone staring at him, Logan realised he hadn't changed into his work clothes. No instead he was wearing large spiked combat boots, torn black skinny jeans, with a sleeveless punk rocker style Jean vest. Even his hair was a vibrant blue instead of the normal brown.

"Uhm...Logan? How come your dressed like that?" Patton had asked curiously.

being pulled from his thoughts by Patton's question logan turned to look at the fatherly side,

"Well it is not my usual attire, I am comfortable like this. I merely forgot to change before popping up. If you would all continue with the discussion you were having prior I would be grateful."

"I agree, let's get back on topic." 

Logan was thankful for their host for helping in getting everyone's eyes off of him.

For the next hour or so they discussed whether or not Thomas should do one thing or the other, He didn't pay much attention. He was too focused on a strange feeling (heh feeling) that someone was in his room.

As soon as Thomas had his issue resolved Logan was the first to say goodbye, of course with a reminder to drink water and be healthy, but he was out of there quickly.

When he got back to his room he didn't immediately see anyone there, curious as to why he felt like someone had been. Looking around his room he noted how all the books were in place, his bed was still neatly made, his closet doors were slightly open as he had left them. Taking a moment to double check inside his closet, he felt like someone had their eyes on him. As he walked out of his closet he noticed a small paper and box on his desk.

Making his way over he examined the note with a strange curiosity.

To Lo,

I have a proposition for you, if you would like more info, check the kitchen  ; )

From, someone.

As curious as Logan was about the note, he loved a good puzzle after all,  he looked inside the little box. Inside there was a small space pin that had 'viva la pluto' written on a small ribbon. To say he was shocked was an understatement, he was baffled as to who would have given him something so nice and who would have gone through the trouble of learning about his disdain for Pluto no longer being a planet. 'It is a planet, stupid people.' he thought as he placed the pin on his vest. Making his way down to the kitchen he noticed Patton making dinner with Roman and Virgil not around, possibly in their rooms.

"Hello Patton, I wanted to apologize for my appearance today with Thomas, I nearly forgot to change, I will make sure it doesn't happen again."

Turning around and smiling brightly at Logan, Patton just gave him a shrugging wave. " It's alright Logan, I think we were all just surprised to see you...all punked out." "I understand the confusion Pat, I tend to only allow myself to dress this comfortably when there is nothing that will need my sudden appearance."

He Gave Patton a small smile while looking around the room, he noticed a small deep blue note on the counter, "hey pat, who's the note for?"

Patton turned and followed Logan's gaze- " oh that? Im not sure who it's from but it's got your name on it." Logan walked over and picked up the note, choosing to pocket it for the moment. "Well I am going to go reorganize my books, I shall see you at dinner Patton." He finished saying as he walked into the shared living room. Pausing for just a moment to read the note.

To my Star

I know you like to read so check your favourite book to find the next clue

From someone cool.

As he made his way back up to his room he couldn't stop himself from theorizing who the notes were from, it wouldn't have been Patton as he was with Roman, and Roman well, to be honest he didn't think Roman would do something this simple..

As he entered his room, he almost immediately noticed ' the murder of Agitha Christy ' sitting on his bed- not on the shelf. Sitting down on his bed picking up the book, he fondly remembered the first time he read the book, it was such a nice memory. When he opened the book he saw the note, gently taking it out and setting the book back on his bed, he read the note.

To My Sun,

I know this has been short but here is your final clue, meet me where you'd least expect me, yet exactly where someone like me would be.

Love your admirer.

'My Admirer?' he thought to himself as he got up to return his book to its place. Thinking logically he slowly went through the list of who it could be, Patton and Roman were quickly ruled out seeing as they were together. Only for a moment did he think it'd be Virgil, but realizing that Virgil currently likes Deciet, it wouldn't be him.  Pacing back and forth in his room for a good 20 minutes he decides to try looking around the 'basement.'

No it wasn't really a basement more like where deciet and Remus chose to have their rooms.

Walking down the hallway that leads toward the 'dark sides' as Roman puts it, login again felt like he was being watched.

Making his was down to the common area for the 'dark' sides logan looked around seeing neither deciet or Remus. After a few moments of looking he sighed and thought out loud to himself. "who would send these notes, especially to me?' after all he was the 'nerd' he was logic. Although he didn't enjoy the nerd aesthetic as much as his punk one, he just couldn't get his thoughts to a conclusive answer about why someone would admire him.

Lost in his thoughts he didn't notice Remus come up from who knows where to stand right infront of him.

"HIYA Logan, whatcha doing down here?"

Be started into reality, login recomposed himself before answering, "I was looking for the author of some notes that I've been left, I am merley looking everywhere." He replied maybe. Little quickly, he had hoped Remus didn't pick up on it.

"Oh well, that sounds fun can I help you??"

Remus asked while bouncing on his feet, seemingly excited about being able to help someone. For a few moments logan questioned why Remus would want to help him, however he couldn't bring himself to a logical conclusion as to why he shouldn't let him help. He sat down on the couch that was behind him, and held the note out to Remus. "This is the last note I received however I do not know who the author is, and such I figured I just look around in places I wouldn't normally go." He finished with a huff, looking up towards Remus. He was reading the Note and doing his weird thinking face, Logan took this time to really get a look at Remus, he wasnt in his normal Dukey attire, he was wearing something more akin to how logan was dressed. Biker boots, ripped cutoff shorts, a black sleeveless t-shirt that read 'could be gayer' across the chest and a fully studded and patch covered Jacket. Logan laughed a little to himself about the similarities between his and remus's styles.

"Well, do you have an idea as to where I should look Re?"

Almost as if he had forgotten Logan was there Remus blinked then bounced right back into energy town. "I DO!!" He shouted and grabbed logan by the wrist. "I know this seems kinda crazy but just follow me!" Remus bounced forward dragging logan along with him. Ignoring the nice feeling of having someone else hold you, Logan followed after Remus, hoping it wasn't to far.

"Okay I'm gonna need you to close your eyes and trust me." Remus asked as he stopped in front of a door Logan didn't recognize. "May I ask why Remus, I do not wish to be the subject of your pranks."

Remus looked around quickly trying to come up with an excuse, not being able to think of a good one, he replied simply. "it's a surprise! But also because we have to cut through a part of my imagination. And I don't want you to be er.. grossed out?" Remus finished quietly, being considerate of the others feelings was a bit strange to Logan, seeing as Remus rarely did it, however he was more curious as to who the author of the notes was. He made the decision to trust Remus, and of he was honest with himself, he was hoping Remus was the author, seeing as he liked Remus for quite a while now.

"Alright Remus, I trust you to keep me safe, we can go when you are ready." Logan adjusted his glasses to look at Remus, who had been staring at logan with a wide grin plastered on, but slowly it wavered as he processed what logan had said. "You...you actually trust me enough to enter my imagination?" He asked, looking down rubbing his hands awkwardly together.

"Well yes, you may not have the nicest or cleanest thoughts and ideas, but you are a part of Thomas, and to be honest with you Remus, there are times when I prefer deciet and yours company more than the others. You are unpredictable and can be a bit much however, I have no reason to not trust you. You have never directly hurt me, or the others - well minus roman."  Hoping that He didn't pick up on the emotions behind his words, Logan let out a small breath he didn't realize he was holding as Remus bounced in excitement. "Okay, let's go!"

Grabbing Logan's hand instead of wrist this time, Remus pulled logan into his imagination as soon as the other's eyes were closed.

Logan now with his eyes closed and his hand in remus' , he hoped Remus knew where he was going, but then again, He tended to know a lot of weird things, so he let himself get pulled along what sounded like a dirt path. Every so often he would hear humming from Remus as the walked. It had only been 10 minutes of walking but to Login it felt like longer, what with his eyes being closed and all that.

"Okay stay right there with your eyes closed." Remus had asked him calmly, with what seemed like nervousness in his voice if only a little.

"I.. uh okay" Logan replied trying to show as little confusion as possible. He could hear Remus walk towards and open something but, without the visuals he couldn't identify it, so he waited patiently playing with the various spikes on his wristband.

Remus slowly walked back over to Logan, a bouquet of wilted flowers in his hands (he tried for days to make living flowers but couldnt)

He gently tapped logan on the shoulder, "okay you can open your eyes now" he said with such gentleness that the other had not heard before, slowly opening his eyes and looking at his surroundings, he couldn't help but to be shocked. Up in the night sky there were thousands of glowing stars with a large shining moon bathing both men in a nice calm light.

As Logan looked around he noticed the partially alive trees and bushes that surrounded the clearing they were in. Remus had a wonderful imagination,sure, there were random creatures wandering around and random dirty jokes personified everywhere but it was wonderful in its own way. He wondered why so few were willing to see it.

Finally looking over at Remus, Logan noticed how he was already looking at him, with a goofy grin on his face holding what seemed to be withered flowers. "I know you are a hesitant person sometimes and that you like to do things in the most logical order. However demented or disturbing to the other my ideas and thoughts are, you help them to understand me better. Which I can't thank you enough for. So Logan Sanders...would you like to...go kill people together?  LikeBoyfriendsShould? On a regular bases?"

It took a moment for logan to process all of what Remus had been saying, and if his thinking was right Remus was the author of the notes, and he was asking him out in a very Remus way...

For once Logan didn't have the words to respond, the side he has had feelings for, for a while is asking him out and to be his boyfriend. Before his logical thinking could stop him he stepped forward grabbing Remus by his jacket collar pulling him into a kiss.

Taking the kiss as a yes, Remus slid his hands around Logan's waist, kissing him back with passion in an attempt to communicate how happy he is. When they pull apart logan looks at him with a sparkle in his eyes that was usually reserved for learning. However right here right now, with Remus, in his imagination logan couldn't be happier, even with all his grossness or disturbing thoughts, Remus was the one for him.

"Thank you, and to verbally express my feelings, I accept your offer to be in a romantic relationship, Darling."

"Haha I figured from the kiss but thank you, to hear you say it makes my heart explode into a million pieces hahah." Leaning his head on Logan's shoulder the two sit and talk until dinner, to which they both go to, sharing glances and holding hands, much to everyone else's confusion. they lived punkily ever after.

I hope y'all like it, let me know if you do

Sorry for any errors in grammer or spelling, it isn't my strong suit

[zer0comma]

just wanna show my appreciation for gorillaz and my gratitude for them because they opened my eyes and ears to new different forms of art and genres of music. it's kinda long but ive been feeling a lot of love for damon and jamie recently so i had to write it down. before discovering them i never really cared about animated music videos. and even tho i draw, and i did enjoy watching them, i never really appreciated the hard work that was put into making them and just considered them as short cartoons that were made to catch your attention or some sort of a replacement when the artists weren't creative enough to film their own music videos (very stupid of me, i know. i was dumb and judgemental). it wasn't until i was 16 that i started to become more curious about the whole process of making animated videos and that started mainly because of gorillaz. for some reason i have always felt attracted to their music videos even tho i wasn't really into their music back then (i did enjoy some of their hits like clint eastwood, feel good inc and dare, but being the dumb and judgemental edgy, grunge lover teen that i was 3 years ago, i didn't allow myself to enjoy them). i remember reading the comments and seeing fans mention the characters and i was very intrigued by that. eventually, in april 2018, i decided to give them another shot. i was just getting out of my grungy and edgy phase even tho i still hated on anything that was released after the 90s. i kept listening to their singles and i was just blown away by the animation. how smooth and original and creative it was. how much it fitted the music even tho the storyline and the music weren't that connected. i was just fascinated and it was after listening to rhinestone eyes and looking at the storyboard that i started to realize that this band was very special, and the more i learned about them the more i started to appreciate all the time and energy and money and passion and love and devotion that have been put into this project. i started looking at a lot of pictures of the official art and i loved it a lot. it was so absurd at times, but also very unique and original and fun and lively. and what made me more interested was watching the bananaz documentary and seeing jamie hewlett work behind the scenes, and listening to the interviews that the animated band members did. i really, really liked how each character is different from the other and how interesting and unique and funny they were. reading rise of the ogre made me even more attached to them. it was during that time that my appreciation for animation started to grow. i started paying attention to all the small details that make animated videos so damn special. i started to appreciate it as a tool for entertainement and a tool for self expression. it was seriously a huge turning point for me, and i started watching a lot of different animated movies and most of the time they manage to blow me away. now let's talk about the music! i can never thank this band enough for making me get out of my comfort zone and give other music genres a listen. as i said, i was really into grunge (ironically, it was one of the main reasons why blur never made it in the us at the early 90s, but now im huge britpop fan), and i had this very wrong idea that rap music was bad, that pop music was trash, that keyboards and synths and electronic music in general didn't deserve a lot of praise because it wasn't played with loud electric guitars (im literally facepalming at my own stupidity rn, i was a very cringy 15 yo). i literally did not listen to anything else except nirvana for almost 2 years. discovering gorillaz (and later blur) completely changed my persepctive on music. it literally changed my life. i'm not even exaggerating. the year i discovered gorillaz, 2018, was the worst year of my entire life so far. and if it wasn't for the artists that i discovered thanks to gorillaz and the artists i finally allowed myself to enjoy after gorillaz changed the way i listen to music (like the strokes!), i would have done a lot of dark shit. anyway, back to gorillaz. at the beginning, i wasn't really into the songs that had rap features on them. i didn't like plastic beach that much because it was heavily influenced by electronic music. i didn't even listen to humanz. i was very selective when i was listening to their music at the beginning. but then i tried to push myself to give them another chance. i decided to listen to demon days without skipping a single song. i read a little bit about the record and what it was supposed to mean to put myself in the context of the album and i listened. my 1st listen didn't do much for me. it was during my 2nd listen however that i felt like my third eye just opened. i tried to pay attention to the lyrics, to put myself in the mood of the album, and that's when i started to understand the message the album was trying to convey and i started to emotionally connect to the music. i started to realize the importance of each of the guest artists. how honest the rap on dirt harry felt. how scary and powerful de la soul sounded on feel good inc. how smooth mf doom sounded on november has come. it was a wonderful moment. that's when i started to accept the fact that ITS OKAY to listen to anything that wasn't 90s noise rock. eventually the rest of their songs started growing on me and i found myself introduced to a lot of artists ive never heard of before. i'm currently listening to de la soul and i'm still mad at myself for not giving this kind of music a chance. last week i started listening to fatoumata diawara's discography after hearing her for the 1st time on désolé and i'm just blow away by how great she was. her music makes me emotional and ive been only listening for a week. also this may sound embarrassing, but being an african girl myself, a tunisian girl from north africa to be exact, i never learned to appreciate the music of my own country until last year, and it's basically because of damon albarn and his interest in african music. i know that having a white man encourage you to embrace your own culture is weird, but the main reasons why i decided to listen to our music again were as i mentioned before, damon's love for african music and my willingness to listen to different genres and styles thanks to gorillaz. i just want to thank damon and jamie and everyone who's been involved with the project. i know that the band has been facing some small issues related to the storyline and the consistency of their music but that doesn't stop them for continuing to be an inspiration not only for me but for hundreds of thousands of people over the globe. i'm just very grateful for their existence and i wish them nothing but the best because they truly changed my life for the better.

[himeryuukinka]

[ LFRP ] Ane - ( Balmung, Crystal DC )

❝ there is a muchness about you. I wonder... what I must do to have such muchness in myself..? ❞

🔓-- A lock icon denotes the presence of an additional something significant to be discovered only via roleplay. The more locks there are, the harder it will be to learn! Build a relationship with her to discover these secrets she keeps to herself. 

This LFRP post is specifically for her geomancer verse. Check over here for access to the LFRP post for her canon verse. I can play both/either on Balmung/Crystal as necessary!

❀ General Information ––– -

Name: “Ane.” 🔓 🔓 🔓 Epithet: Of the Weeping Waters. Gender: Cisgender female. Age: 28. Race: Au Ra (Raen.) Birthplace: Yama, Othard. 🔓 Current Residence: The Itomori Shrine, Doma. Relationship Status: Single. Sexual Orientation: Demisexual. Occupation: Yaman geomancer.

❀ Physical Appearance ––– -

Hair: Incredibly long. Straightened with a hot metal comb. Typically worn loose with some hair elegantly looped and bound just above her shoulders, framing her face. Seldom changes style. Looks to be all warm black. 🔓🔓 Eyes: Warm grey. Clouded by cataracts. Somber. Height: 4 fm 8 im. Distinguishing Marks: Rounded, soft scales reminiscent of a koi’s. Geomantic circles tattoo’d on her palms, the bottoms of her feet, and upper back. 🔓 🔓 🔓 Common Accessories: Ornately patterned silver bands in the front two strands of her hair. Brass bangles around her wrists and ankles decorated with suzu bells that remain curiously silent even when shaken. 🔓 

❀ Personality & Tidbits ––– -

A solemn young geomancer hailing from the seaside village of Yama. Her sad and serious air lend her presence a degree of mystery, and her lifelong practice of tempering her emotions makes it harder still to know how she actually feels. Having dedicated all her years to her people’s form of geomancy, Ane thinks herself ill-suited for anything else, and so her entire sense of identity has become tangled up in the magicks that she wields. She believes that she exists for the sole purpose of using geomancy to help the people around her, leading the young woman to quickly throw herself headlong into danger without a moment’s hesitation so long as it is for the sake of someone else. 

Talents: Yaman geomancy. Weaknesses: Physical/close quarters combat. Unable to use offensive magicks entirely. Kindness directed at her. Virtues: Dutiful. Genuine. Tender-hearted. Gentle. Curious. Thoughtful. Meticulous. Flaws: Naive. Perfectionist. Reckless. Overextending. Emotionally clumsy. Silently self-destructive. Has difficulty detecting sarcasm and understanding certain idioms and forms of humor. Spiritual Views: Reverence for the Dawn Father. Respect and recognition for the kami. Hobbies: Cooking, though really only skilled in Far Eastern cuisines. Ikebana. Tending to the shrine’s grounds. Fears: Isolation. Being forgotten. Dying before she can train new geomancers. Temperament: Melancholic. Alignment: Neutral Good.

❀ Yaman Geomancy ––– - 🔓/🔓🔓

I thought this topic could use its own brief section as her clan’s form of geomancy is not the same as the geomancy seen widespread in the Far East, as well as having some very specific elements tailored to her personal use of it. Those characters who are well-learned geomancers have the potential to recognize her as specifically from Yama so long as we discuss it ahead of time, and those who are familiar with geomancy or nature-based magicks may be able to reason out what she uses but not where she is from -- or why her geomancy differs from the more common forms. As with everything, I am happy and willing to discuss IC arcane knowledge, but do please run it by me ahead of time. Her clan was very secretive concerning its branch of geomancy, and while not at all closed to visits from the outside world, this art is absolutely not common knowledge! Please take this information as OOC reference for how this magic works rather than IC knowledge! Thank you!

Magic Family: Geomancy. Tools: Sacred paper talismans. Arcane ink carried in blessed brass pots. Brushes. A single heavy, enchanted bell inspired by bianzhong. Rounded stones of various sizes and weights. Strengths: Magic cancelling through elemental balancing. Barriers. Weaknesses: No way to counter physical weapons or unarmed physical strikes. Lengthy barrier preparation. Entirely a supportive and defensive art. General Overview: An ancient branch of geomancy thought dead by many. Rather than drawing only from the elements of wind, water, and earth, Yaman geomancy draws also from fire. It has never been intended as an offensive art and cannot be conjured as a weapon in battle. Instead, it revolves entirely around elemental balancing -- aether of one element is met with an equal force and amount of its opposing element, effectively cancelling out harmful magicks entirely. A delicate art with a lot of room for error, it requires years upon years of practice to master as it requires a great deal of concentration; those sensitive to aether may display a natural gift for it, as they can more easily sense how much oomph to give a particular counterspell. Failing to meet an elemental force with a sufficient counterforce can result in the spell connecting without real issue (too little) or wounding the geomancer in the process with an unstable aetheric burst (too much.) Though, like its Doman and Hingan counterparts, Yaman geomancy still relies heavily on comparable channeling methods -- that is, the combined use of an enchanted bell and glyphs to summon a specific element or combination of elements. It is more reliant on physical totems, though, and so Yaman geomancers would carry paper talismans upon which to write what they required in combat. Ane’s Geomancy: Where hers differs is how she channels it, but I prefer to keep the specific details for roleplay discovery! 🔓🔓

❀ Traits ––– -

Extroverted / In Between / Introverted

Disorganized / In Between / Organized

Close Minded / In Between / Open Minded

Calm / In Between / Anxious / Spirited

Disagreeable / In Between / Agreeable

Cautious / In Between / Reckless

Patient / In Between / Impatient

Outspoken / In Between / Reserved

Leader / In Between / Follower

Empathetic / In Between / Apathetic

Optimistic / In Between / Pessimistic

Traditional / In Between / Modern

Hard-working / In Between / Lazy

Cultured / In Between / Uncultured

Loyal / In Between / Disloyal

Faithful / In Between / Unfaithful

❀ Additional information ––– –

Smoking Habit: Never. Drugs: No. Alcohol: Very rarely. Surprisingly good at holding her liquor.

❀ Hooks ––– -

Region-specific connections. Asterisks (*) for options open only through discussion with me beforehand.

❀ The Village of Yama* - The once-proud seat to an ancient form of geomancy now all but lost to the world in the wake of its destruction at the hands of the Empire. Villagers who Ane may have known prior to the deaths of most everyone on the Shore of the Blue Lily are a welcome connection. There is potential for other survivors apart from Ane and the small group of children she managed to save, though know that all other geomancers perished in the attack, whether by their own lack of experience or their remaining behind to cover the retreat of those who tried to escape, and so any Yaman geomancer characters would be strictly past connections only. 🔓 ❀ Doma, a Wartorn Nation - Doma is the nation that most often saw secret services rendered by Yama’s geomancers, and Ane continues to honor that as the village’s sole arcane successor. She spent much of her formative years traveling the length and breadth of Yanxia to better understand its people and their plight with the Empire, and so there is plenty of opportunity for Doman characters to either recognize her personally (had they met while they were both younger) or to have a suspicion about her duty as a geomancer. Doman characters have lots of avenues open to them, considering she has lived among them since the ruination of Yama!  ❀ The Island Nation of Hingashi - Similar to Doma, Ane sometimes travels to Kugane when necessary. While not a place she frequents, the potential is there -- but do not be surprised if she initially regards Hingan geomancers with distance and dislike. She does not take kindly to charlatans using her beloved art to take advantage of the desperate, and there’s no shortage of such people in the port city to fuel her suspicions.

General roleplay connections. Asterisks (*) for options open only through discussion with me beforehand.

❀ A Hidden World of Geomancy* - Other geomancers, particularly those native to the continent of Othard, would likely have intimate knowledge of Yama and its people, and Ane would be more likely to trust them implicitly with certain facts than with those outside this arcane circle. I like to think of geomancy as having something like a support and information network unique to its practitioners; geomancer connections have the potential to know things about Ane that others would not! 🔓 ❀ Those looking for stationary arcane wards. - Not too unlike the magicks employed by the scholars of Nym, Yaman geomancy involves the enchantment and careful placement of keystones around a structure or area to shield it from attack or approach. If your character is in need of long-term wards for their home or business, Ane will oblige. ❀ Those seeking someone to accompany them with mobile wards. - Far trickier and taxing to employ than stationary wards but certainly not impossible. Ane wishes to help as many people as possible, and so if you’ve a character looking for some extra protection on an adventure or dangerous foray into the unknown, she’s not one to turn down a request for aid. ❀ Those in need of elemental protection. - Perhaps Ane’s greatest skill. She’s more than willing to help keep people safe by way of her clan’s geomancy; those venturing forth into an intensely aspected dungeon or region could certainly benefit from her magicks! ❀ Generally, those looking to fight for those too weak or beaten down to fight for themselves. - Often branded as a goody-goody by her guardian, Ane is quick to help those in need -- and often without a thought for the effect it could have on her. She will mesh easily with characters of similar values and morality and struggle with those who do not. But that being said... ❀ Enemies and rivals who might challenge her beliefs or give her trouble are absolutely welcome. - Conflict has excellent potential to build characterization, and I am all about that! So if you play a more evil or chaotic-aligned character, please don’t be be afraid to come push her buttons. ❀ And of course, friendships. - I’m always down for great platonic relationships, especially those that grow into familial affection. ❀ Thought of something not listed here? - Drop me a line so we can talk about it! While typically centered in the Far East, I already know of ways and reasons she would be in Eorzea -- so if your character does not frequent any of the places she spends most of her time, we can easily fix that!

❀ OOC Information ––– -

Genres: I am not particularly genre picky; I gravitate most towards those scenarios that may result in interesting, long-term character development -- and hopefully for both/all parties! I am a sucker for angst with purpose, though I do also love fluff and slice of life scenarios. So long as the scene doesn’t run out of steam or feel strained/stressed, I am a happy bean. Playstyle: I am... not very skilled when it comes to in-game roleplay. I prefer to connect one on one or in very small groups (no more than five people) so I can put my all into making certain my replies are timely, tidy, and... well, good. I prefer to write on something like tumblr or Discord, but I can do my best to make in-game work! Length: I’m someone who leans most towards a paragraph at the absolute minimum, but I can produce pages if we’re roleplaying on tumblr or Discord. Server: Balmung for roleplay/visiting with in-game friends, though my PvE main is over on Ultros. Both characters are available under the name Ane Borel. Timezone: CST. Availability: In-game: most of the time, so long as you give me a ping and ask if I can hop on! Discord: Much of the same! Please do be aware, though, that this is subject to change as I’m interviewing for some jobs and my schedule won’t be so free in the future. I’ll update this post when necessary. Contact Information: Obviously you can contact me here! This is a sideblog to my main over at @sunlitpeony, where you can also message me, and then I can give my Discord out upon request/interest.

{ banner art by: the-xaotician }

[houseofvans]

SKETCHY BEHAVIORS | INTERVIEW W/ CRYSTAL HABITATS

Combining stain glass, metal smithing and mineralogy, founder of Crystal Habitats, Rachel Pitler transformed her drawing and painting skills into a magical world of 3D stained glass and molten metal sculptures – from jewel adorned cardholders, wands, daggers (athames), to ring holders, just to mention a few. Not only one thing, Rachel is also a co-founder of Bitchcraft, an unique holiday event featuring over 60 vendors, selling everything dark & magical. We’re excited to talk to Rachel and find out more about how she started her creations, what inspires them, and what she has planned for 2019! 

Take the leap below!

Photographs courtesy of the artist. 

Introduce yourself. My name is Rachel Pitler Hsiung. I am a mixed-media artist (stained glass, molten metal, oil painting, and clay). Originally I am from Detroit; however, I have been living in Los Angeles now for many years. My professional background is in the rock & mineral industry. Working in this field allows me to travel to all the big gem shows where I am able to work with interesting specimens on a daily basis... as well as being surrounded by these beauties is a huge creative plus for me and where I draw much of my inspiration.

Tell us a little about your background in art? I never had any formal training in drawing & painting. My mom is a fantasy illustrator, so growing up I often sat with my mom and watched her paint/draw, and I took to it myself pretty quickly. I got a job in my 20s teaching art to kids & teens on the basics of drawing, watercolor & oil painting. I taught art for 8 years. It was a really important time in my life for me to grow as an artist. Through teaching others I discovered a lot about myself, I learned to enjoy my process of making art, to never stop learning, and to push myself out of my comfort zone into new mediums.

How did you go from working with traditional material like oil paints and pastels to a medium like stain glass and solder?  When did you start creating pieces out of glass, metal, and so forth? A little over 5 years ago one of my best friends Erin Coovert (Moontan Stain Glass) started taking a glass class. She encouraged me to try out her class, I did and have been forever changed by this incredible medium. I am so grateful to her for sharing this path with me as it opened up so much more for me in terms of my creative abilities. It's really hard when you have a lot of creative ideas, but little tools to make them into reality. I was such a two dimensional art person trying to be a 3D artist and for whatever reason stained glass opened that part of my brain up to problem solve and tackle art projects that I would have otherwise given up on.

Tell us a little about Crystal Habitats and the unique pieces that you create for it? In mineralogy, the word crystal habit is a characteristic of crystal groups & individual crystals. I wanted to make artwork that reflected my own take on crystals and create pieces that are like little worlds within themselves, little habitats that harness magick and cast their energy onto whoever uses them. Art for me has always been a refuge and a place of healing. 

I love making tools that do just that. I make wands & daggers (athames) that are adorned with crystals & molten metal. I make three sided pyramids (often with crystals adhered to them), jewelry, ring holders, and a lot of other items. In my drawings & paintings, I have a fantasy world I came up with called The Ice Crags. Many of my paintings & drawings take place in this realm. My characters are often High Priestess (and wizards). Recently I have started to making these characters in stained glass.

Of the many things you create–from wands to daggers–which is your favorite to make and why? What is the process like for one of these, from start to finish? Right now I am really enjoying the process of making my snake athames (a type of dagger). Snakes represent healing & transformation, when paired with a stone setting and blade, these pieces really become a source of internal empowerment.

My friend John (@jabforge) makes my blades, I make the hilt with molten metal...I cut out a copper/metal sheet with my metal cutter to create a handle. I hand solder the entire base...there are different ways to solder...I have adapted a painting style of soldering, you can create patterns within the metal to give it a unique look. When I add the crystals I make bezels out of metal, and solder it to the hilt, and I hand make the the snakes out of epoxy clay. I give my pieces a dark patina and I often use my dremel to smooth out parts and I sand it down to give it an interesting aged look. I enjoy making these in particular as it is a collaboration which I always love and each piece has such a unique character to them. When working with molten metal, I never know what pattern I am going to make till I start soldering, it's always fun to see how they turn out.  

In your studio, what type of art materials and tools would we find on your desk? Too many tools and never enough tools! Lead free solder, soldering iron, flux, glass cutting materials, dremel, jewelry wax, metal cutter, thin wires, metal sheets, copper sheets, all sorts of dental tools (I use them for carving) epoxy clay, lots of glues, torch, hammers, paint, glass, wood, my lapidary wheel, patina, cabochons and crystals parts, there's a lot of stuff! Im super obsessed with working with new materials. Since I work in a handful of mediums, it becomes a real science project in my studio mashing them together to see what works and what doesn’t.

What are some of the cool collaborations you’ve done? How do collaborators incorporate your works into what they’re doing?  A recent collaboration I did was with my good friend Alex from Acid Queen Jewelry. She makes incredible jewelry and we often talk shop on a weekly basis. She made a gorgeous ring and I made a matching glass ring holder (glass base with a quartz point as the holder for the ring). She and I will have more collabs in 2019! Very excited to work with her again! And as mentioned earlier John from Jab Forge. He is a blacksmith, his blade work is my favorite...his blades look like moon craters, they have a real old world look to them and I enjoy matching my style of metal work with his work.  

What medium haven’t you tried that you’d definitely like to get your hands on? Metalsmithing. Well this is a medium I have dabbled in but really haven’t gone deep and it’s my goal for 2019 to get into it more. Specifically so that I can incorporate a different type of metal work into my stained glass & my solder work. Medium cross over is my favorite thing to mess around with, good for the brain ;)

Not only are you behind Crystal Habitats and its creations, but you had an active role in creating an event/community called Bitchcraft. Can you tell us more about Bitchcraft, how it started and the idea behind it? When was the last one and when’s the next one? Yes! 10 years ago I co-founded it with 4 of my friends. We all made things and wanted an all female handmade collective where we could barter/sell goods.  I believe we had like 10 vendors at the first one in our friend’s backyard...now there are over 60 vendors, it's a pretty large holiday event. It's a collective that celebrates everything dark & magickal, a curated group of like-minded makers filled with everything from metal goods, apothecary, altar items, capes, wands, jewelry, and really a lot of items related to other worldly and the occult. We just had our annual holiday show in December! There's always a chance for a mid year show but for now not till Dec 2019 :)

Who are some of your favorite vendors or artists from that Bitchcraft community? What’s your favorite thing about that community? Oh that is really hard for me to say!! Most of these people have been my friends for a long time and have been a creative support system and I cherish all of them and appreciate & admire all of their works. My favorite thing about the Bcraft community is the friendships! There is so much love and support with this crew...outside of this event a lot of the vendors work with each other on projects, do shows together, help promote and support one another. Having a strong group of makers is super important to me and has helped me grow so much as an artist, and I am so thankful for all of them!

Who are some other artists you’re inspired by? What kind of things inspire you? I have the longest list of artist who have inspired me!! But I have to say my very top inspirational artist would be my mom, Sheri-Pitler McClure. Her work is everything to me...she has a way of drawing people that is so out of this time, totally belongs in Middle Earth. Growing up my mom surrounded our household with fantasy - wizard & unicorn statues spread throughout our my childhood home...she is a big fan of science fiction, so as a kid I was exposed to all movies and books on the subject. She is also a rock collector (she did opal lapidary work back in the day) so I guess all of these things had a big impact on me. When I was really young she painted a series of these goddesses that represented the different seasonal full moons. These women were painted as strong ethereal beings, who’s magick reached out from the canvas and wided my eyes to endless worlds one could create. That was my first memory of how art can really change your perspective and it has stuck with me ever since.  

Other things that inspire me spans from crystal formations, old medieval paintings, everything Tolkien, old lore & fantasy books/movies. I am also really into the color pallet of the Dark Crystal, I often watch and think about that movie when I am making.

What’s been the most challenging part of maintaining Crystal Habitats? What’s been the most rewarding? What do you do to keep the balance? I would say compartmenting my time has been a big challenge….often people tell me to do my art full time but working in the mineral business is my dream job and it is also is a place where I come up with my concepts...its like one can’t exist without the other, so figuring out the balance of them has been something that I am always working on. The most rewarding part is when I have a really fresh new idea and I am able to execute it….there are some designs that I will do over and over, but when a new design pops into my head it becomes extremely exciting to work on.

Recently I have been bringing balance into my work space by not taking on too many custom orders or too many shows...allowing myself to have breaks...through these breaks I have been able to come back fresh and renewed, which is very important to my process.

What’s your advice to folks who see what you do and want to pursue it as a career? Don’t compare yourself to others. Keep learning, discover new mediums, always be a student of something it really opens your mind to concepts that otherwise could be dormant.

What’s your best advice for creative folks on social media platforms, like Instagram? Have fun! I know that sounds lame, be seriously don’t get caught up in it too much. The more stress you surround yourself with social media & the more it takes away from your art. I love using social media, I love using it to showcase my art and be connected to other artists/communities, but don’t allow it to become overwhelming. I think being true to your art is the most important part:)

What are your FAVORITE Vans?  Slip-Ons!

Finally can you share with us what exciting things you may have lined up for 2019? I’ll be working on a new line of handmade jewelry boxes. A lot more snake themed items for sure!! I have been working on some Shield Maiden jewelry through metalsmithing/lost wax mediums, it is something I have been really taking my time with and I am hoping to have some completed soon. I will also being vending at the Culver City Gem & Mineral Show in June 2019.

FOLLOW RACHEL | INSTAGRAM | WEBSITE 

[glassleaks-blog]

MR VOORHEES Q&A PART 3: The Past, Present, and Future of Voorhees Glass.

The glass industry has grown exponentially over the last 5 years, with new artists, new techniques, and new colors. We felt it was necessary for the glass community to have some insight on the artists, and what drives their creative engines. It was always in my interest to learn more about an artist that has always had my attention, respect, and admiration. Mr. Voorhees has developed some of the most aesthetically pleasing, and incredibly functioning glass to date. He has never remained static, always pushing the boundaries of his work, and exploring multiple mediums to express his art. We were delighted to have the chance to ask him some questions about the past, present, and what we can expect from his future!

I feel like a good place to start would be simply how did you get into glassblowing, was it a window for your street art and paintings or did you start with a different medium such as graffiti, sketching, etc?

VRHS: I started making glass in 2004 with the help of Adam G who gave me the opportunity to try it out.. since I was a little kid, my dad was always drawing and painting and naturally I wanted to be like him.. that’s where my drive to be an artist came from.

That’s awesome! So where were you born n raised, where did you start and where are you currently blowing glass?

VRHS: I was born and raised in Michigan, that’s where I started.. now I’m in Southern California, been here for the last few years.

So how did you begin the heads? were they originally modeled after anyone in particular?

VRHS: I always drew and painted faces of different types and when I started gathering the skills to sculpt glass it just started happening.. I was super inspired by the pieces I was seeing from Bearclaw and the faces he was making at the time also.. I give a lot of credit to him for the direction my glass went in the beginning. I was also very inspired by the work I saw from Martin Janeky and Ross Richmond, two amazing dog glass sculptors.

That’s an excellent insight! My next question then would be how did you develop function and your line of pieces? The HIB function is iconic.

VRHS: Honestly the function was something that I didn’t even consider.. I was in Philly working at Krushmore and saw Slinger insert a perc through the bottom.. I always wanted to see the head inside the glass, watching Slinger opened that door.

Slinger and you do a lot of work together, who are some of your other favorite artists to work with?

VRHS: Pretty much every one of the people I’ve done collaborations with have been a blast to work with, I’m definitely looking forward to working with Peter Muller again for our show at Piece Of Mind OC in September.

I have to ask for all the vrhs collectors, will the classic HIB series end at 100?

VRHS: That is correct. The solo HIBs will be done at 100. I’ll still do a couple variations (recycler, doublestack) and will make collaboration HIBs for now.

Besides the development of HIB1 What do you think was the most challenging solo HIB to complete, and among all variations of the HIB do you have a favorite? (submitted by IG: @namastay_heady)

VRHS: Oh man, I don’t really know.. learning how to now break the first few was a challenge. It seemed like I was breaking three to get one finished without any problems, after I got my timing down with my moves and the heat they became much easier. My favorites change so often, right now I’m excited to make these last few as nice as I can and end the series with a bang.

You have made the head iconic in your work and yet have reached in so many directions with astounding work such as the abstracts, full bodys, bags, painted techs, and now the new murini stack style. Do you plan on moving forward with all these styles, or do you like to retire some?

VRHS: I get bored really easily, I enjoy the process of making glass and the infinite things you can do with it.. the murini stack pieces are something I’m having the most fun with at the moment, the things you can do with this style of work never ends. It’s making me think about glass in a different way than I ever have before.. I’m definitely planning on moving forward with all styles, combining some and refining them.

Thats really an honest an inspiring approach! I can tell you after speaking with Bump, Chef and from my personal experience with other VRHS collectors, the blend of old and new is something really exciting. It’s not often you see an artist also span multiple mediums so fluidly, I know I myself am dying for the next drop of paintings! Can we expect to see more paintings, clothes, and accessories?

VRHS: Absolutely, I’m always working on paintings here and there, I’ll probably release some this summer along with some new shirts and a hat hopefully, a couple other items too.

Thats exciting news! Are there any artists you havent collabed with yet that you would specifically like to?

VRHS: Too many to name.. There’s artists I’ve been friends with for most of my career that I haven’t worked with yet, and there’s a lot of people that are of the “newer generation” that are making such beautiful and unique work.. the list of people I’d like to collaborate with seems never ending.

I feel that! As a collector myself I’ve noticed how detail oriented you are. I often search VRHS rigs that I meet for UV glazed eyes, or small CFL pieces. I think that its a very dynamic part of your work.

Your work is definitely one of a kind, and regarded as both aesthetically pleasing and of the highest quality function, I just want to say thank you for giving us some insight on your work and Im sure the entire VRHS community thanks you keeping it so real. I know the community is excited as hell for the Muller show and for whats in store for the future of your art! You’re definitely appreciated!

VRHS: I just want to make nice work, nice glass that is sturdy, functions well and looks good.. There are so many boro colors out there, the possibilities are endless. I want to say thank you to my collectors, shops/gallery’s and fellow artists for all the love over the years.. I really appreciate you giving me the chance to speak on my work.. and all the kind words.

Voorhees was such a pleasure to talk to, and I know we are ecstatic to see what he brings to us in the future. At the top pictured is a very early head sculpt, HIB #0, an abstract owned by IG: jahfyahson, the first VRHS I saw in person owned by IG: gucciglob, the blue dream recycler “Doug” owned by IG: heady_bj, his new style “murini stack”, a blend of two new styles “Painted tech” and the new “MIB in a bottle”, some of his paintings, and my personally owned, Head in a Bag #2! Thank you again for all readers! Let us know who you would like to learn about next @glassleaks on Instagram!!

[themousai]

Q+A: NEWMEDS

You guys have all been involved in several other well established bands, how did you all meet? And what made you guys decide to start creating together?

Myself (Nick) and Brodie (Joe, drums) had been good mates for a long time. We worked a few nights together at Brodie’s bar and started to discover each others music taste. That's where the idea grew for NEWMEDS, we sorted a practise room and started looking for the right guitarist. Mark had just become available after parting with a previous band. We both kind of had the same idea to get him anyways. Brodie had previously been at music college with him and i had just started talking to get to know him. We practised together as a 3 piece for a while and realised we wanted a bass player to get involved. We had a lot of interest from good musicians that heard the first song we put out which was called "Rosyln". We knew the person had to fit the bill though, enthusiastic, good stage presence, could help with backing vocals, and likes a good night out. We knew Sam from the music scene, he is notorious for been in several bands at a time, but he had just left one. He had showed love for the song, and said he would love to get involved. We asked him a few days later, he snapped our hands off. It's 4 lads from 4 different, but not too different backgrounds, its no limits, no restrictions on sound, i think that would interest any musician starting a band.

Your hometown, Hull, has just been crowned UK City Of Culture – tell us what the music scene is like there? What’s one thing you think is done really well, and what’s one thing you’d love to see improve? Well i think the City Of culture stuff is slowing down now, the torch gets passed on, i think Coventry have it now. It did a lot for the city though, a lot of people were negative about it, saying they would have done this and they would have done that. But mainly i think its put eyes on us from places we wouldn't have been heard. It's been really positive for everything not just music. The music scene has ALWAYS thrived in Hull, there's always been quality bands, and it's still the case. We know a lot of the musicians from Hull, many have been in bands for years, some younger kids starting up for the first time. To make music is always a positive thing, if your music connects with one person then you've made a difference right? There are a few independent venues that have been there for years and now we are attracting bigger promotion names. It's good and bad, things change when big companies come in, sometimes not for the better. The work and progress places have made by themselves to get to that position is quickly over looked, and the bands that used to play don't get a look in sometimes. I hope that's not the way it goes here, but time will tell i guess. It would be nice to see more local bands be given a shot at playing those bigger support slots. In the Leeds and Newcastle O2 academies they will only give support slots to local bands, that's cool, we should learn from that.

Are there any stand out bands in the scene that you wish everyone would listen to right now? Im gonna answer this from a perspective of hard work and the pay off from it, because so far we haven't played with a whole load of bands in NEWMEDS.  LIFE from Hull, are a very hard working band and its finally paying off. Stew Baxter (Drummer) worked for years for the Warren Project in Hull, improving the scene and bringing opportunities for bands and musicians in Hull. He also helped us massively and made us believe in ourselves, whenever im feeling at a dead end with trying to push the band further i know i can just ask him his opinion and get an honest answer. From a point of bands that we've seen or played with so far The King Is Dead are super tight live, as are Strange Bones, as are our friends from Three Day Millionaires.

Your sound is really something special - blending together black metal, punk and emo, with a little psychedelic edge – where do you guys draw inspiration for what you create? I guess it just comes from such a huge range of different influences. Also the bands we have been in previously definitely help us in terms of what to do, and not what to do. Our songs always have a driving drum beat, nothing complicated, but always solid and memorable. The things Mark can do with a guitar astound us every time. He has completely nailed the sounds he wants, he has built his own sound, and amazes us every time. Mark comes from the more Black Metal side of music, but has also played in Blues bands and many many other genre bands. I personally grew up on Hip Hop, Metal and Hardcore Punk and Emo. Brodie was always into Skater Punk and Rock, playing in bands of a similar style. Sam has played in bands from Mathcore to Dad Rock but has similar influences to myself in parts. I think we are such an open book for new ideas that it just works. We are constantly in the group chat showing each other new music and ideas for songs, everyone is hugely creative and talented. The music creates itself, if it sounds good it stays, if it sounds out of place we will usually say "Good, now let's work and adapt it a little".

Run us through the creation of one of your songs – do you find each has a similar recipe? Or does the process change every time? A lot of our songs have come from a simple drum beat. Mark and Sam smash ideas out over the top of it, and then we work on structure. We will chop and change bits down move them around leave them for a week, make a rough recording then "skim the fat" off. Once finished with the music, we will make another recording so i can sit and write lyrics. I'll spend countless hours getting the lyrics right, sometimes i've written 10 sets per song. I would never do it another way, the lyrics are so vital. If people can't relate to the lyrics i doubt they will feel the song. We don't write all the songs the same way, sometimes idea's have come from one of us having a beat, or a riff in our heads and then you have to go through the humiliating process of "mouthing" it to the band because we don't always have the capability to pick the guitar up and show Mark what we mean, or jump behind the drums and smash a beat in our head out.

Lastly, convince our readers to come out a show in 3 words. We giveaway vodka

Answered by Nick Cobley

Quick Fire

The one song I wish I wrote is...  Miami - Taking Back Sunday Three things I can’t live without are… Hob Nobs, Pacifico and music Phones out, or phones away if you’re watching a gig... Phones away! Three adjectives that describe my life are… Hungover, Drunk, Hungover If I held a world record it would be for... Bones broken in my body! My first memory of loving music is… listening to Black Sabbaths self titled in the car with my dad. The song of mine that I am the most proud of is... "What's Your Problem" My favourite venue i’ve ever played is… 100 Club in London The ideal environment for me to create music in is... A sweaty room with the lads. b>If I could have any two bands open for me they would be...  Every Time I Die and Highly Suspect

Answered by Sam Rudderforth

Keep up to date with NEWMEDS Facebook | Spotify | Instagram

Interview by Mandie Hailwood

[purgatoryandme]

i just,,,,,, i know I'm late to the party but i just need to tell you that the unique style of Illuminate Me completely floored me and i cant believe im actually considering to buy myself a copy of Paradise Lost,,,,, despite not being a huge fan of,, classic? literature???? i absolutely adored all those quotes and thinking processes. and i was and still am completely blown away by how well do u know literature, its so amazing! so thank you for blessing the world with such masterpiece. 💙💯

You are not at all late to the party and you are very very welcome in it! I’m so glad that so many people gained some interest in classic lit and interpreting it in their own ways (outside of an english class) because of this fic!! Repeatedly I’d put in quotes and be like “this is so heavy-handed of me” or “this is totally too much” ahaha. Paradise Lost is MASSIVE, but it’s also the kind of poetic epic where you can crack it open to any random page and find something that speaks to you, religious context or no (because it contains a lot of thought about the human condition if you look for it…also Milton wanted to justify God’s actions, but IMO it is REALLY INTERESTING to acknowledge the fact that God is presented as somewhat wicked and Satan gets some really complex characterization - apply those character’s dynamics to say…characters in the Marvel universe and you can see them in a whole new light). Getting through the whole thing at once is a struggle, but reading passages? I could do that forever (especially with different modernizations of quotes I really like - “What is dark in me, illumine” is the most annoying phrasing lmao).In that vein, here are some other really good Tony quotes from Paradise Lost:“This horror will grow mild, this darkness light.” Is such a good line to keep in mind when it comes to the passage of time. I like to imagine Tony at the end of IM having a sneaky BARF session where he relives Siberia and just…takes a knee next to himself when he’s all alone in that bunker. Places the shield over that version of himself’s heart to protect it and tells him that line. Hnngh. “Awake, arise, or be forever fallen.” Honestly feels like Tony’s personal mantra when he can’t see the light just yet. He can’t take laying down. He can’t take losing faith in people or the world - he needs to keep his eyes and his heart open despite falling down. My phoenix son “Ah, why should all mankind, for one man’s fault thus guiltless be condemned.“ Is part of a bigger piece about God punishing the act of gaining knowledge with a creeping kind of death - not an intentional one, but one that will result nonetheless from humanity leaving the garden of eden. This whole bit is Tony’s approach to heroism and why he supports the Accords so hardcore. People nearby a villain shouldn’t be collateral damage when stopping that villain. The innocent should be untouched, even if fate or some other force bring them into harm’s way. Tony wants to deny that fate.And a proper modern translation bc old english bothers me unless it is spoken: “Go, for if you stay against your will, you are more absent.” Is the biggest lesson Bucky has to learn about Tony. Forcing Tony to be around him may make him physically present, but emotionally it’s causing him to drift away. PS. As much as I whine about Old English and genuinely think it keeps a lot of people from classical lit, watching plays performed in the original script (or sections of poetic epics) with proper acting is S O L I D ! It keeps some of the most clever writing in tact without an awkward language barrier. I got to see Shakespeare By The Sea and it was A+++++ would recommend. 

[lovelysad1114]

focused writing has been proven benifitial to mental health. ive already learned that way before i read this article about this particular findings. exactly, its so therapeutic. and ive come to the realization that reading really helps with ur cognition as well. reading + writing + youtubing + redditing. i suppose my life will be revolving around these few aspects in the following 1-2 years or so.

no wonder geoff is so eloquent, his brains so active, he could brainstorm etc just like me...like u can see the sparks in his eyes. the secret to that is probably reading. he reads extensively, even tho he doesn’t read original books from great historical thinkers lol. still he keeps his mind engaged, keeps learning and growing.. thus hes young at heart hah. i wanna be him when i grow up LMAO. good role model. ive seen his longer message today, absolutely love his writing style. its like so natural. despite not writing any essays, hes able to write things in wonderful language.

i suspect in order to be more creative in my own writing, i need to read actual books rather than simply read reddit mindlessly. i have been reading difficult philosophical books like nietzsche’s on the  geneology of morals. it’s not easy for me to follow actually, let alone immitating his writing style. i did learn a lot, mind blown by his insights. however, precisely because of the difficulty of reading him, there’s certain mental resistance created during this process. thus a lot of times i can’t bring myself to picking that e-book up and read, also i have a hard time concentrating on reading them when im in the library lol.

anyways just realized that reading short essays and what not shows significant enhancement in my thinking process, which means the portal to my mind is opened up etc...

omg btw im gonna hit geoff’s house tomorrow. excited LMAO>.. i like him tbh, tho i am also convinced that we’re not gonna be together sadly... gotta admit i have special feelings towards him.. but... its sad af that we cant be together... i blame it on this fucking random universe.

nevertheless, i shall at least take 15 minutes to write a tiny bit of things daily. just to keep my mind engaged. like any muscle, it atropies if not used. need to use them frequently. need to use my brain and not let negative/ obsessive thoughts reign my head. they do absolutely no good to me, instead they sabotage my mental health a great deal.

shit. did not know that i could write so magically smoothly... surprised by this spontaneity.. its defintely a good start. i suppose im gonna stick to this routine in the next couple days and see what could possible happen etc... probably i’ll be able to speak/write english like a pro by the end of this year lol...

[takadasaiko]

72 for Bobo del Rey holy fucking tomatoes

FFN II AO3

Summary: Wyatt Earp gets a first-hand experience at just how much his friend Robert has changed since he last knew him.

Notes: One of the reasons I haven’t buckled down and written a multi chapter spec fic is that I have to many ideas. One of those is where Wyatt comes back and the team finds him. I was discussing part of that idea with someone and realized how well this little part would fit the prompt. So here we are. I don’t intend to have a resurrected Wyatt in any future one-shots (maybe? You never know. An AU to a little series of one shots that will eventually be AU?). 

Writing Prompt #76 “You deserve so much better”

Deserve Better (Fallen Series)

They’d found him locked away in what was little more than a dungeon. How long he has been there, Wyatt really couldn’t say. It had been a blur of time. The one thing he was certain of was that it was Clootie’s doing. He would never forget that demon’s face.

Everything had happened so fast he had barely had time to process it. Three men had appeared at his cell door, one of which had been Doc Holliday. Wyatt had felt relief sweep through him as he pulled his old friend in. He was alive. How didn’t matter. Not anymore. Not after everything.

The second man in - a deputy marshal by the name of Dolls he found out - had hurried Doc along in getting Wyatt free. The third spoke in a low, almost strained voice when he announced that they weren’t alone and to get Wyatt out of there. He would meet up with them later. It hadn’t been until they had gotten out that they had explained that their third was a Revenant himself. The other Revenants couldn’t kill him even if they tried, so he was the one that got to buy them time. Wyatt never saw the Revenant’s face and he didn’t recognize the name that Doc called him by. Funny, he thought he remembered each of those that had been caught up in the curse.

Bobo Del Rey had kept tight control of most of the Revenants in Purgatory, so Wyatt learned. He had lost a lot of that when Clootie was resurrected, but he’d struck a deal with the current Heir and those still loyal to him were willing to help them put Clootie down in return for a free pass when all of this was over. Seemed like a fair enough deal. Or it would have been if they were still men and not demons.

And that was what had brought Wyatt Earp to this strange place with its high gates, guards armed with guns very different than the ones he was used to, and glowing red eyes side-eyeing him even as they let him in. He held his hands up as a sign of what he hoped was good faith. “I’m here to speak to Bobo Del Rey,” he declared. He just needed to know for himself who this creature really was. He needed to make sure his great great granddaughter wasn’t making a mistake that would cost her her life.

He made them nervous, that much was obvious. They wouldn’t make eye contact with him and answered any questions he asked in short sentences. He finally caught one Revenant’s eye, a thin smile quirking his lips at the way he shifted away when Wyatt called him by name.

Their mood seemed to change as another approached, and he looked about the right height for the Revenant that had been with Doc and Dolls earlier that day. Wyatt hadn’t gotten a good look at his face, but he would now, and hopefully he’d have a better idea what to expect. There were half a dozen outlaws he’d come up with that might have changed his name and taken over, and none of those former men instilled any sense of trust in him.

“Wyatt Earp,” that same deep voice from earlier greeted him as he approached. He was a sight with most of his hair shaved off his head except the strip of stark white hair, a single strip of black in it. He wore a heavy fur coat with buckles and straps, his shirt torn beneath it and his boots an odd style. Nothing like what Wyatt was accustomed to, but the world had certainly changed in the last ninety or so years.

It was those eyes that Wyatt recognized, and it felt like someone had dealt him a hard blow to the middle. He couldn’t draw a reasonable breath in as he stared. “Robert,” he managed with what remained of the air in his lungs and his friend stiffened a little at the name.

“Take a walk, boys,” he instructed the Revenants around them.

“But he-”

“You think I don’t know who he is? A man doesn’t forget the one that killed him.” Robert’s voice was cold. Somehow those blue eyes were sharper when they weren’t hidden behind his spectacles. “Plans haven’t changed tonight. Get to work.”

The Revenant Robert had directed the order to looked over to Wyatt. “You gonna have him take Carl over?”

Robert snorted. “Wyatt Earp? Wouldn’t want him to dirty up that conscious of his. I said I’d do it myself. Nothin’s changed.” The expression he wore looking so foreign on his features. Everything looked… off. It left Wyatt feeling a little sick. Like a monster wore his friend’s face. A demon.

The Revenants moved away to whatever business they were being sent on and Robert waited until they were out of earshot to turn back to meet Wyatt’s eyes. “Let me guess, Holliday sent you here without telling you who I was, hoping you’d catch me in the middle of something you’d hate.”

The words threw the gunslinger a moment. “I don’t think that was his intention,” he managed after a moment, but even he wouldn’t have believed himself and it certainly didn’t look like Robert did as he chuckled, flashing white teeth in a way that made him look strangely dangerous. He was, Wyatt reminded himself. He hadn’t escaped the curse.

“Oh, I think you and I both know better than that,” he murmured, something like amusement colouring his voice. “Hank gets his blows in where he can, and fighting for the same cause does limit him on the ones he can get away with these days.”

Wyatt had always known that the two men wouldn’t be close, but he’d hoped on some level they might be able to get past their differences. Apparently not.

He cleared his throat. “Well, at least I understand now why you were willing to side with Wynonna. I… I’d hoped that you might have escaped this curse-”

“Did you?” Robert tilted his head in question. “Because the good ol’ padre got me a set of letters you left for me explaining everything. Sure as hell looked like you knew I’d be caught in it.”

Wyatt closed his eyes, gathering himself. Robert was angry with him. It wasn’t like he’d meant to wrap him up in this mess. He hadn’t meant to get his friend killed. “I’d hoped,” he repeated sternly. “I am sorry, Robert. Truly I am, but if this had to happen… at least we can face this together.” He watched as Roberts expression melted from a sort of shock at his words to a laugh that chilled him to his core.

“Sure,” he growled, the word harsh and biting as he turned.

Wyatt reached out, catching hold of the coat. “Robert, please. Nothing I can say can put this right, but we’re both here now. What were you talking about earlier? Something that needed to be done.”

He watched the man he’d once been close with close his eyes, a low snarl escaped him that was so very, very different than the Robert he’d known. He turned back though, his eyes flashing briefly red. “You wanna see what’s happening here? Keep up.”

Wyatt hesitated only a beat before following Robert’s quick and determined pace through the collection of… homes? He wasn’t sure, but he did see pairs of red eyes watching him as they moved, hell’s own brand marking the scattered faces. He kept up with Robert until they made it to a circle and he saw those faces had followed them to the opening where a fire was building in the middle, a man chained there. He looked terrified and Wyatt looked to Robert for some sort of clarification as to what was happening.

“Don’t interfere,” was the only warning the naturally dark haired man growled as he took center stage.

The man chained near the fire started to whimper loudly. “I didn’t have a choice, boss! Bulshar, he made me-”

Robert flashed forward with an unnatural speed, snapping the nearly weeping man up by the hair on top of his head and hauling him till he was standing. “You’re not doing yourself any favours, Carl, calling that name out here. You think he’s going to save you? Protect you? No. You’re expendable. That’s why he sent you in. I would have protected you, but you turned. I told you what would happen, didn’t I? I warned you.”

“Bobo, please,” the Revenant - Carl - begged, but there was no mercy in those blue eyes.

“I warned you,” Robert answered icily and straightened, eyeing the others. “Take this as yours. Clootie will be put into the ground permanently. He can’t and won’t save you. Not from me.”

Wyatt watched as Robert reached down, unhooking part of the chain and the other Revenants murmured. “What will he do to him?” he asked the one closest to him and the demon blinked.

“Bobo warned us that if any switched to Clootie’s side he’d haul ‘im over the line himself.”

“The line?”

“For the Triangle. Outside.”

Then it clicked. They were stuck inside of it. “But he can’t leave. None of you can.”

“Without hell on earth, yeah.”

That’s why they’d asked if Wyatt was going to do it. He wasn’t a Revenant. He wasn’t bound to the Triangle like they were. “Won’t that do the same to Ro- to Bobo?”

The Revenant shrugged. “Sure, but ain’t nobody gonna cross him again. Not being willing to go that far.”

Don’t interfere. Now he understood, more than he might have been able to before. It had been nearly a century since Wyatt had passed away and the curse had truly begun. Robert hadn’t had a choice in what happened, but there he was still fighting the fight. It was terrible and it was ugly, and it was impossible for someone to come out of that whole. The fact that he’d retained his loyalty in any shape at all spoke volumes. It was…. so very Robert, despite the changes.

The screams sounded in the distance they crossed the boundary. Wyatt could see the way the smoke was rising from both Revenants, but Robert remained stoic, fastening the chain and bending to speak directly in the prisoner’s ear before starting back for the line.

No one moved to help him and somehow he was still on his feet. He swayed very slightly as he crossed back over, but kept right on going without a word, the screams of the one he’d left on the other side echoing. The other Revenants began to disperse, the show over, and Robert stalked in what looked like a particular direction.

Wyatt followed him to one of the tin homes that were scattered. “Robert?” he called softly.

“You wanna talk it’ll need to be in here,” Robert grumbled and Wyatt barely caught the door before it swung closed in his face.

He stepped in and home was a very loose interpretation of the sparsely decorated space. If he lived there, it didn’t look like he stayed there often. Robert moved to a cushioned bench and all but collapsed into it, his arm wrapped around his middle and his face screwed up in pain. “Shut the door and lock it,” he managed and after a moment of looking Wyatt found the latch to do so. When he looked back over he saw Robert struggling out of his coat, patches of skin showing to be red and angry once his arms were free of it. He grunted as he pull something wrong.

“Hey, take it easy,” Wyatt murmured, moving to help him, but he found himself startled to a stop as a snarl left his old friend, blue eyes shifting to red and the skin around it darkening. Interesting. No brand showed on his face like the others.

“What do you want, Wyatt?”

The response died in the other man’s throat. He wanted to help him, yes, but that really didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. He had done this. This was his fault, and that realization was becoming more real with each passing second.

Robert grimaced and leaned back. “Can’t you save whatever judgement you have to deal out until I’ve healed?”

Wyatt cleared his throat. “I have… no room to judge you, Robert. I think you and I both know that. You wouldn't….” He paused, not accustomed to being at a loss for words. Best just to be honest. “I did this.”

Blue eyes blinked, pained expression giving way to confusion. He sat up a little straighter and he turned his attention briefly to the marks on his arms before long fingers started working at his shirt, pulling it up to inspect what was being hidden by it. Angry, red burns that looked like they went a lot deeper than any burn should - almost like he’d been burned from the inside out - stretched across his torso. They ran below and all along his ribs and up above where his shirt still covered them, some lighter marks appear above his collar line. “I told you to take the shot,” he said after a long moment, his voice still gruff, but much less defensive than it had been before.

“You didn’t know what would happen.”

There was a sigh and he reached up to massage the bridge of his nose, a habit that even Wyatt knew. “Neither did you.”

Wyatt set his jaw. “Don’t you hate me for it?”

“Oh yes,” Robert drawled out.

Well, that stung more than he’d expected.

The Revenant loosed a long breath and eased the shirt back down, finally meeting his eyes. “And no. It's….” He shook his head.

“Complicated,” Wyatt murmured.

“Yeah.” He reached up and ran his hand along the strip of hair on top of his head, flattening it down a little. “I didn’t mind dying for you, Wyatt. I was ready to ride to hell and back if that’s what you needed, and I have. I…” He closer his eyes. “Just woulda been nice if I’d meant as much to you too.”

He felt abandoned. That’s what this was. “Every letter you wrote back said you were doing better.” The argument felt hollow even to him.

Robert snorted. “I lied.”

“Obviously.”

“What was I supposed to say, Wyatt? Come sit with me as I die? By the time I’d pushed it too far…. It was too late all the way around.”

There was a beat of silence between them and Wyatt took a seat across from his newly injured friend, their eyes meeting. “I am sorry. I’d have come back if I’d known. I never meant for you to be alone.”

“You always did love John Henry,” Robert murmured and he sounded like he was echoing the words from someone else.

“And you,” Wyatt promised softly. “You were my dear friend, Robert. For me, that hasn’t changed.”

“I’m a demon.”

“You’re Robert Svane.” Blue eyes flickered up and Wyatt sighed. “I ain’t saying you’re the same as you were then, but that doesn’t change your core. You’re a good man, Robert, always have been.”

Robert gave a mirthless chuckle. “Death made you delusional.”

“And it made you a bit more of an asshole than I remember,” Wyatt answered with a smirk of his own. “Lost that damnably polite tone of yours along the way, didn’t you?”

His old friend’s expression eased just a little. “First thing to go.” He shifted, the amusement fading. “We should head back into town.”

Wyatt nodded and stood, offering Robert a hand up. He saw the way that he looked at it funny for just a moment, like he wasn’t sure if he should take it or not. “You deserved better than all of this. So much better.”

“Yeah,” he said roughly, finally accepting the hand and letting Wyatt help pull him up to his feet. “But now we’re gonna give Clootie exactly what he deserves.”

[pensurfing]

Caitlin’s Three Things List

Okay, so moments (probably hours by the time I finish this) ago I wrote a goals list that I think is good for self-evaluation. (Keyword: This is what I think. results may vary depending on what you’re looking for.)

I’m going to hop to it and answer some of these that I laid out in hopes of having a better idea of what I want to accomplish. 

The Three Things Lists!

1) Three things that went well this year.

* Audience growth

So once upon a time, I grew a pretty decent following due to creating an Inktober Prompt list. My expectations: Maybe two of my friends would do this, maybe. And then one stranger that has followed me for a while. (There are a few followers I recognize their username because if I post something they always like it and for some reason that keeps me going.)

But because of this prompt, I was exposed to MANY new creators and illustrators that I now enjoy chatting with and following! Instagram had the biggest maintained growth. I’m excited to create for an audience that actually expects me to create and not just for friends who see my things “whenever they aren’t busy”. (Not to bash them or anything, just there are a lot where unless I tell them, they don’t see the posts I make.)

Another surge of growth in my audience was due to tabling at conventions this year. I was terrified to show my work let alone attempt to sell it to someone. Tabling at cons not only boosted my confidence but also quieted one of my ever going demons. “YoU sUcK aT dRaWiNg CaItLiN.” “How do you have a degree? oh right, you just barely passed.” I can’t say this is the case, there is an audience that genuinely enjoys my scribbles. So I am forever thankful to Atlanta Comic Con for giving me that chance. It honestly opened a few doors for me.

**Process

I’ve gotten more comfortable with showing my process. It can be messy, crisp, and illogical. But turns out the people who enjoy my content enjoy my scrambled thoughts. It’s something about not being alone in this sort of sense that calms the nerves.

So I can say with chest poked out that sharing process has gotten MUCH better. I can thank a self-help book I bought this year that was a FANTASTIC BUY. Austin Kleon has [two] (currently? If he has more then I’m buying it like people buy a name brand.) books that helped me see that it is GREAT to share not only the process but advice. “Show Your Work” is the book I’m talking about for now. Great tips, the outline is on the back of the book. So if you’re like me, I need to clearly see what I might be getting into, you might have a ball.

And finally, (not calling myself out on this but other) If you’re going to respond to people when they ask you “how do you___?” do not answer “Google it”. That is the rudest thing I’ve seen some of even my FAVORITE illustrators do; that response can burn in hell. PERIODT. (my one typo allowed.)

*** Art Style Exploration

For those who think college will help you establish an art style that you’ll enjoy or help nourish the one you currently have.... Let me save you over 80K.... No, the fuck it won’t.

That was the biggest thought I had going into art school. If anything, it confused me more and utterly destroyed what little confidence I had in my drawing style. After graduating, I had a huge swing from how I used to draw to how my art currently looks. I stopped trying to please the one professor who stood between me and my degree and started drawing to please my tastes. And guess what? That did something. And that something WORKED. I love what I draw now; I see why I chose this as my career path. I’m genuinely happy with how my pieces turn out versus in college just wanting to turn the damn thing in and hoping it isn’t an F.

2) Three things you could have handled better.

* The loss of a good paying client.

Now hear me out when I say this: A good paying client DOES NOT EQUAL a good client. Say that three times and then exhale.

Back earlier this year, I had the opportunity to work with a writer who gave me hell and back. And even that is an understatement. I dealt with her because in school you were taught “if they pay on time, finish the work and get the exposure.” 

I’m here to tell you my lesson learned: A good paying client DOES NOT EQUAL good exposure, good pay, a good client. 

I was doing the work of three for the price of one and a half. (And was always told I charged too much.) She tried abusing this power with friends of mine, with other illustrators. When things turned out bad, she tried saying it was my fault. She read my contract and then tried telling me I changed the wording, I purposely did this thing, another thing was my fault. I could go on with this story.

The part that I wish I handled better?

How I treated myself afterward. I’m so used to people telling me, “Cait, this is what you do wrong. This is how you fix it.” that I don’t consider my own feelings, and when I bring my feelings into the scenario they no longer matter. Because they tell me they don’t matter. In this case, I wish I had treated me better, because my feelings, my mental health, DOES matter.

**My Patience Getting Into Conventions.

Pretty self-explanatory. I got into one, finished one, and wanted to do eight more in a week. But this sort of thing just takes time and I need to accept that.

***My losses

I had to listen to a Little Mix song to actually learn this one. The context of the song is nowhere near the topic at hand. But a verse from Power feat Stomzy really packs a punch after this year: 

“ You look him in the eye and say, "I know I'm not a guy But see there's power in my losses and there's power in my wins" “

I had to look one of my demons in the face, and state something similar. My loses mean I’m trying. My loses piling shows I’m not willing to give up easily, and that is something that took a while to be content with.

3) Three things artistically you want to improve on.

*Composition

It’s not awful, but it can be better.

**Color

I told this BOLDLY if I might add while critiquing someone else’s portfolio; “Your color palette is boring. All your [things] look as if they are from the same universe, during the same time of day, with the same kind of mood. After three photos it’s bland, boring, and understood you have a preference.” 

Can you say damn Cait? The statement was, in fact, true, but I certainly could not talk. My color palette is mainly bright, pop, and happy. In order to tell a story, I KNOW it is best told with color. And I failed myself this year. But I sure won’t next year.

***My Damn Tag

Okay, alright. Why is it well-established artists have their tag figured out? Even some who’s art style is so recognizable (I’m looking HEAVILY at you Gabriel Piccolo.) we know it’s theirs, seem to have a tag that suits them and works for them. But more importantly, they put it in A VERY DECENT SPOT. SOMEONE SHARE THIS SCIENCE WITH ME? CAUSE APPARENTLY I DON’T GET IT.

4) Three things you want to focus on trying.

*More backgrounds.

As much as it pains me, I need to improve on backgrounds and perspective. When I do make backgrounds, I’m told I make great pieces. That I should look into becoming a background artist. And don’t get me wrong, I like them. But I don’t like them.

I feel as though I need to improve in that region so that way I don’t feel as though it’s a weakness of mine. My backgrounds are nice, but they aren’t nice to my standards.

**More designs

I love character designs, but let’s be real. If you were to scroll down my site or my Instagram page, or even this Tumblr archive, could you tell? 

I draw characters a lot sure, but none are designs. No process, no sheets, no turnarounds, none of that. So that’s a huge goal of mine for 2019.

***Scheduling posting

At one point I was pretty good at this. Live stream in Instagram and Twitter, cool. Videos on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Cool. Everywhere gets a photo, everywhere gets a silly one-liner. Yay. I’m not leaving anything out.

Well by the end of this year that totally crumbled. 

SO I want to try getting better at that thing there. Because having attempted this at the end of the year was cool, but it still wasn’t enough apparently.

5) Three positive things to tell yourself.

* You are an inspiration. That’s all you wanted to be in life, you did it. I’m proud of you.

**You didn’t kill yourself like you tried to; you opened up about it for once and used that pint up anger creatively. That is very hard to do, trust. I’m proud of you.

***You moved on, matured, and let it go. Even when the goddess inside you told you these peasants didn’t deserve your light, your friendship, your greatness. I’m proud of you.

I’m just proud of me for not snapping when I had every right to; not everything deserves a reaction.

6) Three negative things you want to leave for 2018.

*Comparisons 

Oh boy. I am extremely guilty for this: I’ll compare myself to a well-known illustrator my age. I’ll compare myself to friends who are in the field having a blast and getting work; I’ll compare myself to friends who aren’t in the field and they struggle at getting work. I’ll compare myself to the kid I graduated high school with who is traveling the world, is able to eat, come home to his dog and relax because he doesn’t have tuition to pay. I’ll compare myself to these goddamn baby boomers who keep repeating “We didn’t have it hard, you’re just being stupid. Millennials aka our children deserve to starve. We’ll just put our faith in our grandchildren because screw the kids we raised and refuse to pay accordingly. $7 an hour worked in my day, they need to make it work now.” I’ll compare myself to fake people I created in my head and purposely made scenarios and wonder why I’m not like them, said creations I made because I was pretty low for ten minutes...

I just compare myself too much. To any damn body. It’s draining, obnoxious and most of all pointless. My new motto for next year is: “Unless it is helping you grow yourself, your brand, your spirituality, don’t do it.”

I’m not comparing my chapter two to someone’s chapter thirty-five. I’m not even comparing my chapter two to someone else’s chapter two. I need to stop doing that PERIOD! My journey is different, unique, and worth seeing through.

**Listening to negative others.

A couple of years ago, I lost a close friend around the time my aunt passed away. During this time I was hypersensitive to any and everything done or said; I also kept many walls up to hide my mourning. He caught the crossfire of all of that. I kept secrets from him I was too prideful of admitting and lashed out because of the emotional turmoil I kept suppressed. While in the midst of packing his things and leaving my life, he mentioned that I was a failure because I was unemployed and artistically speaking I hadn’t accomplished anything; that I would remain that way because that’s just the person I deserved to be. Now mind you, I graduated college that year; he was a flunk out. I changed my art style dramatically compared to when I started school to pass; he thought just posting crappy pictures of lukewarm sketches were equivalent. I started attempting trends and all he could do was copy. Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t to bash my old friend. If he were to come back into my life and move on like nothing had happened I’d do the same. (With some limitations.)

It’s just while typing out this scenario, of our four-year friendship I can’t think of one nice thing/compliment/gesture he has said to me. That’s my problem.

I can be praised, admired, and look highly upon for years straight. But my problem is I let others negative thinking and comments marinate with me for a long while. Too long of a while.

Another example is my mother’s friend. (My mom has many friends that do this shit, but this one stung more.) 

This friend always roots for me; treats me like a person, and encourages my artistic journey. I consider her family before my actual relatives. 

We went over for some barbeque the family was having and I was ready. Black Hallmark Cookouts, laughing, good food, good music, shit talking others teams. She asked me a harmless question of when was I going to quit my day job. Seemed like nothing at first, until the added gest of what she continued with. “All I’m saying is you can’t do [your day job] forever. That will get old. If the art thing doesn’t work out next year what’s plan b?”

I’m not a calm person (usually). Normal Caitlin would have cursed her out and mentioned how just because she chose a job to settle and be miserable at for most of her life doesn’t mean I have to follow suit. But again, of all the nice encouraging things she has done, said, and showed, for a while, I couldn’t think of it. 

So I pray I let go of this nasty behavior in 2018; it’s going to be hard but it is dire.

***Saying I’m Not Enough

Alright, now put the combination of the two above in a bowl and what do you get? A Caitlin who struggles in interviews and applying for jobs because I let comparisons and negative comments rule my thoughts. This stopped me from applying to jobs I would have been perfect for; internships that could have helped me; posting art online.

We (including me) have to stop thinking that in order to be an illustrator means we have to pass a certain threshold of struggle, success, and a huge number of followers. That isn’t the job description. NO JOB DESCRIPTION has ”must have at least 10K followers on Instagram or Twitter.” nOnE. 

So we (including me) need to stop treating ourselves this way. Period.

7) Three things you’re looking forward to in 2019.

*Going to move conventions.

**Adding pieces to my portfolio to try again at job hunting.

***Becoming content with the fact that my current situation isn’t my permanent situation. Unless I laze around and make it so.

Alright, so this was basically me calling myself out on my noise. Lashing out my demons and putting it in writing what I want to accomplish. I hope this inspires you to write yours, even if you keep it private. I hope it guides you and maintains your vision.

I’ll see you in 2019

A new wave

Caitlin xx