#so all i really need is a kickstart
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had to stop taking the new adhd medication but the good news is i can drink coffee and iced tea again
#it's the bright side to every time a medication has failed lol#gotta set up an appointment for alt treatments#pretty sure my insurance doesn't cover counseling and i can't afford it... which is why i've been going for meds#it's one of those things where if i have enough going on in my life i can manage my adhd relatively ok but i'm severely under-stimulated rn#i have too much time on my hands so there's nothing for me to force me to do the things that aren't as interesting as say. fucking around#so the variety of stuff i do keeps narrowing and it just gets worse#so all i really need is a kickstart#which!!!!! if stimulants weren't so hard on my body! would be great!!!#i need structure in my life but setting up structure myself is boring#like yoga is something i LOVE doing but it's still hard to get on the mat even though i used to be able to do it every day#i think that more yoga would definitely help but i don't know how to get myself there#rum.txt
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yall are about to piss me off by not having any PASSING basic knowledge of the way the u.s. military manipulates its recruits into joining by typing up one of your uninformed, unresearched, unempathetic, individualistic, unbelievably annoying posts about how 100% of the people in the military ended up there because they just Love America So Damn Much! they're extremely mature and informed at time of recruitment, they can totally leave anytime they want, they totally had tons of other avenues in life they could've taken, there was no rush at all to get income as fast as possible, and everyone in the military also totally is part of the combat divisions and personally enjoys being IN the military very much, big believers of violence. everyone in the military is shooting guns all day, that's how that works. they LOVE BLOODSHED. also I love the "amewicans haha" twang to this type of shit because you're actually TOTALLY stealing our Thing, which is turning systemic issues into Individual Issues. Instead of talking about the powers that be, it's so Personal Choice up in here. It's, "well you shouldn't have done it then. I totally wouldn't because I know better." you don't wanna talk about the military industrial complex as a whole, and you don't want to talk about recruiters, you just want to pin the blame on Specific Individual People one-by-one, as if they're responsible for the system that they're being ground up in. someone was in the military? bad person, no matter what. it's easier to believe that, I guess, than to acknowledge that Normal People (with high school educations) are manipulated and incentivized into joining a system that is Bad. at like age 18. but yeah no that 18 year old should have just been smarter lol haha anyway here are some screenshots for no particular reason
side note this reply of someone going "umm just get loans and go into a high paying field it's easy XD" as a direct response to someone trying to explain how most americans joining the military are being funneled in that direction out of a need for money.
and another person who Decided that americans join the military just CLENCHING their teeth thinking of other people, and not thinking completely selfishly about their own selves and their own income/housing/healthcare.
#I had a longer post w more bullshit in it but ukw nobody's even gonna read THIS one. so.#dumb ass cunts seriously LMAO just the individualism of it all....#we're all just selectively forgetting that most people join the military straight out of high school / after failing to kickstart#their lives so they don't know shit yet and they are categorically not educated and don't have money#you NEED money and have been groomed by recruiters ALREADY into believing this is#The Best and Only to make a survivable amount of money without a college education-- bc they can't afford college btw#and they don't want to take on student debt either bc everyone already knows what a big fuckeroo that is#recruiters WILL DO ANYTHING TO GET YOU TO JOIN. they will KEEP CALLING YOU. they'll answer your questions#to make it sound like this is going to be a GREAT life decision. you can get all KINDS of jobs (true)#they love to say the thing about how only about 15% of the military will actually see combat in any way#they love to list all the jobs where you will literally just be working at an office or a pharmacy or in tech etc etc etc#the recruiters are offering housing healthcare steady pay and BONUSES if you sign on for longer.#so you let your guard down because you were so scared of the actual fighting. BECAUSE YOU'RE 18 IN THIS SCENARIO BTW.#you cunts will not meet anyone who hates the military as much as people who are NOW DONE working in the military#you don't know enough when they get you and then either you stay placated by the benefits or you scramble away as fast as possible#the number one military haters are people who know what goes on bc they already did it#source: I LIVE NEXT TO A MILITARY BASE LMAO PEOPLE HATE IT HERE!! they are NORMAL PEOPLE#I need you to get it into your head that the people committing atrocities in war were NORMAL when they joined#and that for every person in the military who's actively shedding blood there's 20 who do PAPERWORK#and they both are being put in the same category by you!! and they are BOTH being controlled by the same system!!#sergle.txt#I hate yall I really do.
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We ARE going to bring up Captain Amelia. You have good taste! GOOD TASTE I SAY! *aka I just rewatched Treasure Planet and got hit with, "Oh yeahhhhh... that explains a lot!"*
honestly, the Meg/Jasmine/Amelia trifecta tells you 90% about me as a person. (the rest is covered by Sailor Jupiter and Sailor Uranus and, uhhh, I'll stop baring my soul to the world now)
and speaking of Amelia, this is tangential, but like -- there's one Twst comic I have been kicking at for a while where I needed an RSA sports/flight teacher and, uh, well
someday I will wrangle this stupid comic into coherency and she'll get to make an appearance (in the background of a single panel, half-obscured by a tall hat) (but I will know she's there and that's the important thing)
#art#twisted wonderland#twst oc#my plan worked i've tricked you all into looking at my anime catgirl oc#she exists to yell at some rsa boys so she doesn't really have like. a character or story or anything. sorry!#(her name is alexandria north and that is what she considers a sporty outfit. that's as far as i got)#this is the one that is mainly about silver and neige having a mutual bluebird friend and i am having terrible trouble making it not suck#which given some of the stuff i post should tell you something about how it's going so far#(it's just kind of an incoherent mess of ideas at this point. nothing specific just ~the creative process~)#maybe the rest of episode 7 will give my brain the kickstart it needs. depends on how that goes i guess#god. the next episode 7 bit drops in (probably) just a few days.#I'M NOT READY#i have simultaneously never been ready and always been ready#i exist in a perpetual state of impatience
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Last year I spent about a week or two rotating Fakir's mom in my brain. It didn't really go anywhere beyond a few vague ideas and I just ended up sitting on these sketches for like 15 months, so I'm posting them.
Some quick and dirty headcanons: her name is Bahar, she is turkish and cheesy as it is I decided to make her a ballerina too.
#for some reason I'm struggling to put my ideas into words today#sorry if this is all very vague#ive been sorta lost and overwhelmed by the smallest things for a while now lmao i need help to kickstart my brain a bit#bahar#princess tutu#princess tutu oc#my art#is it really fanart. eh baby fakir is there and i based her on the like two existing frames of her so#fanart
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once again thinking about limes very quick descent into madness surrounding the time when he realizes he might like mochi after the first night he spends cuddling with her. always love the slow start of "Okay she's kinda cute I guess. She has cute tendencies sometimes. There, you happy? I admitted it. Now leave me alone." which in the span of about 3 days RAPIDLY spills into being unable to think about anything else to the point he can barely hold a conversation with anyone because his mind keeps daydreaming back to holding her in his arms. All day feeling like "I can still feel her warmth on me..." and has to keep being snapped back to reality by everyone around him
he can barely even talk to mochi because he keeps thinking about it. has no idea what to say to her the next day. is very quiet. and mochi thinks hes mad/uncomfortable with her now, since hes always so standoffish to girls at school she thinks she might be in that category now. so the next night while lime is about to go to bed, STILL THINKING ABOUT IT, and he gets a text from her that reads something like: [Hey lime!! about last night- sorry i fell asleep on you!! i know your not super comfortable with that stuff!! it wont happen again!! 🙇♀️ see you tomorrow!] and he feels his heart drop to his fucking stomach. lays there reading it back over and over with his thoughts a mix of "Yeah I guess that makes sense, it happened by accident. It was never gonna be a repetitive thing." vs "Won't happen again...? Like....ever? Are you fucking kidding me? I never get that ever again?"
eventually after an hour of tossing and turning, thinks up some bullshit excuse to sneak over to her house and climb up over her little bedroom balcony, knocks on her window and says something like "Hey uhhh you forgot one of your socks over at my place so I brought it back." or something that is absolutely stupid and could've definitely waited for the next day. manages to weasel his way into crawling into her bed with her because every bone in his body is telling him to.
huheuheu love to see lime aching for her eheheh
#rambles because i need to study instead of draw#but i want them to be soft and cuddly#he ITCHES for her after that first night#i think growing up lime always thought he would like. end up with some bombshell blonde hot lady or something.#since everyone around him is like (wow hes so handsome!!) as a kid hed think ahh im gonna end up with some supermodel or something for sure#but he didnt really know what to expect with romance cuz hes too lazy to get to know someone new and go through the notions of dating#so he figured for him...finding a girl he liked might be one of those love at first sight things#like hed see some girl at a baseball game or something and shed be the one#and all of a sudden all at once he starts feeling things towards mochi and its NOT AT ALL how he expected his love life to kickstart#hes like ahaha no way.....mochi?? nahh....why would i like her?? pff....haha....#(a few days later) i want her everything and i want it right fucking now#and this all happens about a day before he finds out shes a witch
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alright. know what? with Secrets of the Obscure right around the corner and plenty of new Mists-related sky island settings coming with it, I'll just bite the bullet and interest-check a little something I've been turning in my head for a long, long while.
would YOU be interested in a Mists-based GW2 roleplay guild that uses a lore compliant multiverse system to allow canon, canon-adjacent, lore-breaking, and otherwise 'contradictory' muses to coexist in the same setting?
simply put: every writer's cast would be set in their own self-contained universe. as such, everyone could bring whatever muses they want with their own personal headcanons, and no one could dictate what is or isn't canon for anyone else. so long as your muses are GW2-based, you're good to go! bring your Commanders, bring your canon-divergent OCs, bring your canon muses-- and yes, even the ones that are 'supposed' to be dead. who can say what might have happened in a strange world far across the Mists, after all?
neutral hubs and in-character safety guardrails would be in place to keep all muses on a relatively even playing field regardless of their power, history, and prestige, too. play hardball if you like, but it might not end quite the way you'd hope. the main rule would be to maintain good OOC etiquette at all times: no godmodding, no metagaming, no theft, don't blend IC and OOC, and so-on.
if that sounds like something you might have interest in, please interact with this post! and if you've got questions or concerns, I'd love to hear them; feel free to send an ask or a DM, or just reply to this post!
#GW2 roleplay#GW2 rp#GW2#my posts#so there's a LOT of reasons why I'm putting this forward#but the biggest is that I really want there to be a place that's actually inclusive for all the creativity that exists in this fandom#there was exactly one Mists multiverse event a while back and it was well-received from everything I saw!#i know i for one had a lot of fun AND felt a lot more welcome and comfortable than i have at any other event#and then... we proceeded to just never have another again.#like. we could have more of that. that niche could still use filling! we can do SO much more with this!!!#and especially with SotO coming out we could have some REALLY interesting locations to meet up too!#I'd be happy to kickstart this stuff but the thing is: it WILL need support. I just can't do it all alone and that's a fact#example: if we want a guild hall in-game we'd have to work together to get one; that'd be great for hosting public and private events#my personal goal is 5-10 participants so that we can have enough to run small events and mingle muses a bit#IF there's enough interest i'll roll out more information at that time. for now tho i'll just leave it at this to test the waters#reblogs are HIGHLY appreciate here: i'm a smallfry in a big sea and not many people check the tags. spread the word if you want to see this#on that note: thanks for reading and hopefully i'll hear from some of you soon. o/#(side detail: that sky pic is a screen i snapped at night in Istan. it's so pretty there ok)
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One week left of being pregnant but ...
Wtf do you mean "invite via link"???
#moli speaks#on the bright news Dan will show up in max one week#on the aweful part holy shit please no i dont want to be induced#doc said it would be via a balloon sending hormones to kickstart labour so it's natural contractions#but i will probably need a c section again and i hate that#the pressure to have a natural birth is strong with this one#i feel like i somewhat fail as a human because i need medical intervention to give birth#its dumb af but i put motherhood really high#all the women that came before me gave birth to a woman that gave birth#this is such a strong bond to me and i look up to my ancestors#especially the slaves#who kept going and gave birth to more girls#fucking legends#and i can't do that???#i feel so uselesss#also it's probably the hormones#anyway Dan I'm counting on you!!!!#come out this weekend when my bf is not at work lmao
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its now MIDNIGHT here which means its JUNE 15TH which means it is now
THUNDER 8TH ANNIVERSARY‼️‼️💥💥
Happy birthday to my goofball knockoff fireemblem with dragons, senseless violence, delaying your revenge but only for twenty years, the body horror of war, and of course, yuri
https://Thunder20xx.carrd.co is now LIVE after hacking away at it for a few days to get it somewhere presentable... I probably need to kick it around a little more however i dont intend to spend money on carrd site upgrade rn, so until i am willing work around that i'm taking a break but yippee! Everyone important's got a blurb, there's pictures, a short mix, the rundown of events; go take a look if you don't mind reading about the knights and lords I mention offhand every couple of minutes here. Or don't idk. I will continue to talk about em here anyway
#we are now in THUNDER SATURDAY⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️tag your least favourite sibling to tear their eye out#yay yippee ive been having a lot of fun digging my teeth into thunder again--i always have been chewing on it but a friend has been#ping-ponging back and forth with me and its kickstarted the juices of wanting to gush about it even more than i do. very fun!#Carrd REALLY hated some of my file uploads but i dragged it kicking and screaming to upload up to as much as it could. look at wolfwoman#i need an oc tag#armour clanking#my art#in the sense that webpage is a form of art and my ocs all count as it. mmmmmm. anyways that is all. goodnight#happy 8th anniversary to my darlings who i will continue to inflict events on for another near decade. thunder will release in 20xx#so please look forward to it ♡#and a thank u to anyonr who as passively asked about in interest or complimented my guys bc ohhhh it means the world to me genuinely tysm
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Whoever invented major depression with year(s) long episodes/groups of episodes should be vaporized i think
#Technically I think the episodes can only last for weeks or months#But mine for whatever reason occurs in clusters spaced years apart so it feels like#5 years on then 5 years off#My old therapist always said that I am largely resilient unless it's sufficiently large stressor occurs in which case it completely fucks m#For a while#Takes so long to get back up#I am sure this presentation is not uncommon. it blows big time doesn't it?#This is an embarrassingly personal post and I will delete it but right now I just need to get it out somewhere#Also weed is really not helping right now. It's fine when I'm doing well but it sabotages at me my lowest#I was really trying my best to get less keep less in the house etc and then Evan's mom without knowing this of course#Says that she feels like she needs a break and gives us...as Evan describes...a “Willy Wonka amount of weed”#😩 truly a blessing and a curse#I'll manage this just makes it harder. She was so generous too#I'm going to go do some planning to kickstart my dumb asshole brain lobes into gear#Sorry if you read all this mess#Woof
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#so my brother is really into the internet show Death Battle and after WB shut down their parent company they had to do a kickstarter#and. I gotta be honest seeing how much money they raised so quickly makes me sick to my stomach#they made over 900 000 dollars. over 4.5x what they originally needed#and also enough to get entire families out of Gaza#obviously entertainment is important but holy fuck did *all* of that need to go to producing more iterations of Superman vs Goku?#just feels fucking bleak to me
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Haha don’t pay me any mind oho
#vent#ok. so#I was! fine for the most part today! but then! idk what happened!#I’m like sad now! depressed? like. I kinda don’t feel real#I think I was giving myself anxiety over thoughts. got really clammy. literally shoveled goldfish crackers into my face#now don’t judge me but#I’ve been looking at things that make me feel bad for like. at least 4 hours now haha..#I dunno man it’s the adhd I got one thought about thing that made me upset and now I’m hours in and my emotions are fried#and. shh don’t tell anyone I feel things but I know have a fantasy of someone I can cry around#whehe how pathetic is that. scraping the bottom of the barrel here looking for another human just let me cry @ you#hmm. how did I go from thinking up poems for valentines only to. feel so cold and alone#I’m not crying. but. I definitely need to later haha maybe this all kickstarted from my two whole hours of sleep last night 😎#mhm so uh. if your reading this with the most cold unfeeling monotone voice then you are exceptionally accurate!i am currently not all here#can’t sleep now tho gotta. do other shit I guess#I’m laying in bed for a second though. my legs were very cold to the touch. unfeeling unhuman#oh and I might be balding potentially but that’s still just a theory. my dad noticed and pointed it out#haha what would I be withought my hair? another germ just populating this Earth?#oho ahh. hm. I’m just a trying to say I don’t fell right now if that makes sense. anyways
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kind of annoyed at my friend :/
#ok so at the cafe at my school theyre having an event thats basically come play board games#and she texted the discord yesterday and said 'who wants to go to this?' and i said yes! i would!#and so i checked in with her bc its this afternoon like do you still want to go? what time should we go ?#bear in mind that she is the one who INVITED evwryone#and she said she has too much work#and i knoww i shouldnt like judge how much work she has but like she had only one class today.#couldnt she have done more of her work earlier considering that she MADE PLANS?????#and i really wanted to go to it i miss playing board games bc usually the only games i can play at school are. uno & cards against humanity#but im from a family who likes weird games my dad finds on Kickstarter (this is a lie only my dad and i play them. my sister and i refuse)#and i only get to play my weird kickstarter games at home!#not that i think theyll have weird kickstarter games :/ but at least itll be VARIETY!!!#SORRY i dont actually like uno and cards against humanity that much. but i need to play something else#i brought fluxx this semester but no one will play it bc they all wanted to play uno and cah first and by the end of those we were tired#they were done to death by like senior year of high school bc theyre the ONLY games anyone will play!!!!#and its honestly an effort to even laugh at any cah jokes at this point . sorry theyre so rarely funny.#and i feel bad bc i have one friend who laughs really easily and so they crack up and im just sitting there like . a corpse#talkin
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i haven’t read anything in weeks i cannot believe my little speedrun reread of the mmcu (melina marchetta cinematic universe) sent me so hard into a flop reading era. like i’m staring at storm of swords right now and even knowing i’m on a jaime chapter isn’t enough to get me going. the power of thomas finch mackee is immense
#maybe i need something silly and easy to get me started again. like finally finishing kingdom of the feared#so i never have to think about it again.#OR i did say i would reread tfota before the stolen heir. hmmmmmm. or maybe a trc reread would hit#i don't really read a lot of ya these days for obvious reasons but there is nothing like rereading a classic to kickstart a reading binge#EXCEPT APPARENTLY IN THE CASE OF SAVING FRANCESCA/THE PIPER'S SON/THE PLACE ON DALHOUSIE.#everyone read the piper's son btw. book of all time and i truly truly mean that#liljana.txt
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@ my tgaa mutuals, what do you all think would drive barok van zieks to villainy. like what would break his moral code and sense of justice. what would he be willing to break it for. asking for a friend
#ooc#me looking directly at barok: sir I’m so sorry for what I’m about to put you through-#WHY DO I DO THIS TO MY FAVES.... SKDFJDS but really I’m just curious about what his main moral failings are other than. the obvious ones??#I haven’t played through much of the chronicles yet so I’m mostly in the dark#i mean I know all the spoilers; but that's not the same as actually getting to know a character in-game; imo#i'm also really interested in how he contrasts with kazuma; like their differences and similarities... particularly regarding their flaws..#IDK I KNOW I SHOULD PLAY THE GAME AND JUST DECIDE FOR MYSELF BUT#sometimes i need some extra motivation to kickstart my non-functional brain into concentrating enough to play!!#if you saw a typo in this post before i fixed it: no you didn't-
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(yandere! zombie x gn! survivor reader) (im such a youtube shorts kid bruh this idea came to me because of a video i watched)
did you know that zombies retain their habits from when they were humans?
well you sure as hell do now, because why is your annoying neighbour still following you around?? he's literally fucking rotting???
"shoo! go away!"
you hiss at him, shooting a rubber band at him before quickly climbing up a tree. phew, you wouldn't be bothered by him from here. it's been like this for a few days now, your undead neighbour following you around as you did your best to survive in this ruined world.
you never really liked him, your neighbour that is. he's always been that one weird guy that keeps annoying you ever since he moved in. constantly knocking on your door and asking to have meals together, to getting to and from work at the same times as you... you're so sure that he was stalking you. how could it ever be a coincidence that he just somehow knew when you were going out and coming back from work?
but now you wouldn't ever know and it's not like you wanted to know anyway. ignorance is bliss after all. oh! he's also very stubborn and it's quite apparent in his zombie form.
"bweh."
"go away!"
the zombie hits at the tree you were sitting down on as he looks up at you with what seemed to be puppydog eyes. you could only grimace at the sight before checking through your supplies. shit, you're running out of stuff.
"ugh... i'll need to scavenge for food-"
"guh!"
you raise an eyebrow at your undead admirer before humming. right, you suppose it isn't that bad that you have him around... he gives you stuff that's useful and scares away other mobs (you think he eats them if they get too close to you). you would've actually coddled him like a dog if he wasn't trying to get into your pants or kiss you every second.
"thanks."
you lean forward and snatch the bad of chips from his rotting hands before stuffing it into your bag. mn, you could probably have that for your lunch and dinner tomorrow.
"let's see... i need to find a good place to sleep tonight."
"bwa! buh beh!"
your zombie immediately starts scratching at the tree bark before jutting his lower lip. huh...
"no, i'm not sleeping in your apartment."
"gah!"
you think you're starting to understand zombie language because why are you holding full on conversations with him??
"don't give me that face. you know our apartment complex is riddled with zombies. i don't want to be turned."
"kh... gur! rh..."
"you think i'm trusting you? i swear i saw our old neighbour lurking around there and he was an olympic sprinter."
you shake your finger at the zombie before sighing softly. why did this apocalypse have to happen? things were going great for you before this. you just had a raise and you were so close to landing a date with your hot boss!
if you didn't know any better you'd have thought that your little zombie admirer was the one who kickstarted this zombie apocalypse because of his jealousy. what did he work as before he turned? a scientist?
"tn... jhn... ngh..."
"don't act all sassy with me right now. it's not like i want to sleep in your place to begin with. you'd probably lock me in there with you and i'd be trapped."
"bah!"
rolling your eyes at the sassy undead man, you rest against the trunk of the tree and shut your eyes. might as well get some rest before setting off again.
"i'm going to rest now. help me keep an eye out."
"kah kah. jah?"
"no, i won't kiss you. and no, i most certainly won't reward you with myself. you're rotting, damnit! how many times do i have to tell you that?"
"ui..."
what in the sassy zombie apocalypse have you gotten yourself into?
#yandere#tw yandere#yandere x reader#yandere drabbles#yandere scenarios#yandere imagines#yandere concepts#yandere zombie#yandere zombie x reader#gn reader#suiana rambling#suiana brainrotting
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What do you call somebody who doesn't seem to be an out-and-out scammer, but is always jumping on the latest tech bandwagons and puts their name on things they haven't even read let alone written and doesn't make sure their coworkers/employees are adequately compensated even when their Kickstarter makes over seven times its initial goal but when they do make good things those things are very good? And it probably isn't solely the work of their coworkers/employees?
#This post brought to you by finding out how the Kickstarter budget broke down for the Lizzie Bennet Diaries and how they didn't get their#contractual residuals. And last time I looked the dude up he was into NFTs and now he seems to be into generative AIs.#Which fits with the LBD and following shows being YouTube vlogs with real time in-character tweets complete with replies to comments.#And I think I vaguely remember him doing a real-time fiction app thing way back when. But those stories were so boring and the app was#glitchy.#Also it was today when I connected that the author of the LBD books is probably the same person as the showrunner for Leverage Redemption.#I'm so tempted to support Ashley Clements on Patreon so that I can get all the dirt on how the Kickstarter money was spent.#And I need to remember to watch next week's Look Back Diaries to hear what happened with the television broadcast/residuals.#Apparently the DVDs are different from the YouTube videos because they LOST the original episodes and needed to re-edit them???????#personal#liveblogging stories#kinda sorta not really#Oh AND they made a Patreon for one of their shows like four years after the show ended and said if they got a thousand Patreons there would#be a documentary but they did NOT get that many patrons so.
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