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wowbright · 3 years ago

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Fic: Pleasure and the Law of Chastity

Klaine Advent 2021: core

Words: ~2000 words

Rating: Teen and Up

Summary: Elder Anderson wants to make sure Kurt’s needs are taken care of.

I’m back with more vignettes from my Mormon!Klaine universe for Klaine Advent 2021! This vignette takes place directly after Lock the Door and Turn the Lights Down Low.

My Mormon!Klaine Masterpost.

Notes: This scene is way less sexy than I made it sound. If you have any questions or typo corrections, feel free to use my ask box!

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Kurt thought their embarrassing conversation was over. They ate breakfast and talked about their plans for the day. They discussed the two types of subjunctive case in German. They debated whether most of the events of the Book of Mormon happened in the Midwest or Central America (neither of them really cared, but it was interesting to think about).

Then, as Elder Anderson was rinsing his dishes, he exclaimed, “Wait a minute!” out of nowhere.

“Wait for what?” asked Kurt, who was wiping down the table.

Elder Anderson turned off the faucet and turned toward Kurt, an expression of concern knitting his eyebrows together. “Is that why you have so many sets of sheets? I'd always assumed it was because you like housekeeping and colorful things, and since you can't express yourself through your clothing, you change your sheets every few days. But is it …” Elder Anderson lowered his voice. “Wet dreams?”

Kurt face caught fire. He looked back down at the table and scrubbed aggressively at what might have been a stain or might just have been a manufacturing irregularity. “We are not discussing that, Elder Anderson.”

“I'm not asking to be prurient.” Elder Anderson wiped his hands on the dish towel and stepped closer to Kurt. What missionary actually stepped closer to their companion when they were talking about deeply personal things like wet dreams? “I'm asking out of concern. You’re my companion, and you've been getting bad sleep, and if that's the reason—”

“This is so inappropriate.”

“Nocturnal emissions are a natural function of the body. They’re nothing to be embarrassed about.”

Kurt suddenly noticed that the chairbacks were getting a little grimy. He began working on the one closest to him. “I'm not embarrassed.” Kurt would need to beg forgiveness for that bald-faced lie in his personal prayers later that morning, though he was certain God would understand. “I just don't know that bodily functions are an appropriate topic of conversation.”

“I don't know. You certainly must have had a few of those companions who proudly announce every single bowel movement. Wet dreams are a lot less gross, as far as I'm concerned.” Elder Anderson sat down in the chair that Kurt was not scrubbing.

“I was going to clean that,” Kurt said testily.

“Do you think wet dreams are gross because they're sticky and leave stains, or do you think they're gross because you think your sex drive is gross?”

Kurt felt suddenly woozy. He grabbed the back of the chair to steady himself. “Who are you now? Freud?”

“I’m sorry. I just … I get why you think masturbation is a violation of the law of chastity. A lot of people in the church think that, even if I don't. And honestly, I do think it can be a problem if it becomes an obsession or gets in the way of serving God. And obviously what I did last night—that made you uncomfortable and interfered with your sleep, and so it was wrong. I do really feel terrible about it.”

Ugh. Kurt wanted to shut out this entire conversation, but it was difficult when Elder Anderson was being so raw and sincere. “I know. To be honest, my sleep always sucks, though.”

“Well, I don’t want to be responsible for making it worse. Maybe I can make it up to you somehow. Fix you warm milk every night before bed? Buy a white noise machine?”

Kurt poked Elder Anderson across the table. “Definitely no white noise machine. You’d just use that as an excuse to …” Kurt bit his bottom lip and stepped over to the counter. He gently stroked the empty sausage package on the counter.

Elder Anderson laughed, his cheeks turning pink. He looked ripe as a peach. It was so becoming. And unfair. “I won’t. I promise. I’ve learned my lesson.”

Kurt laughed too, but he knew the conversation wasn't over. There was something unsettled in the air around them.

“Ku— Elder Hummel, can I ask you—” Elder Anderson looked out the kitchen window. “Nevermind. I don't want to upset you anymore that I already have.”

Kurt sat down. On the one hand, Elder Anderson could really do a better job of not blurting things out, So the restraint he had shown was admirable. At the same time, the idea that Elder Anderson would hold himself back out of fear of Kurt’s reaction didn't sit well. “I'll try not to get upset,” Kurt said. “I don't want to be that kind of senior companion.”

Elder Anderson took a deep breath. “OK. You're gay. Heavenly Parents made you that way. We agree on that?”

Kurt nodded.

“And you want to stay in the church. And if you stay in the church, that means you can never have a relationship with another man. You can't get married. You can't have sex. That's what the church demands.”

“They’re not demanding it of me. I could leave if I wanted to. It’s my choice.”

“OK. So it’s your choice to never have sex. And it's also your choice to never masturbate?”

Kurt nodded, breathing deeply to try to keep the blush on his face deepening at the word “masturbate.” Honestly, it was such an unattractive word. If it felt anything like it sounded, no one would ever do it. Half the times Kurt had been tempted to act on his urges, all had to think about how ugly that word was and the impulse went away.

“And God does everything for a reason?" Elder Anderson asked.

“Of course,” Kurt said. It was the only possibility. Either God did everything for a reason, or God had no reasons for anything, in which case God and the church would be irrelevant.

“Then why did God give you a sex drive in the first place? Because I understand why God gives straight people a sex drive—to drive us toward marriage and to procreate during marriage. But you believe that, even though God made you gay, and even though God gave you a body that experiences sexual arousal, he’s also denying you any pleasurable outlet for your sex drive for the rest of your life?”

Kurt had never thought about it that way. He wasn't sure if he wanted to. It seemed like a dangerous road to go down. “I could marry a woman,” he said instinctively. Because that's what the apostles said. The rules weren't different for people who had homosexual attractions. Just like straight people, they were offered an outlet for their sexual impulses: heterosexual marriage.

Elder Anderson gave him a look. “I said ‘pleasurable outlet.’ It's hard to believe that going against your core nature would be pleasurable.”

Kurt stared at his hands. He had no answer for Elder Anderson. Instead, he said, “Your dad is a general authority. Is he really OK with your interpretation of the law of chastity?”

“Honestly, I don't know. We've never discussed sex beyond the vague generalities that the church prints in its pamphlets, if that. I had a bishop in middle school who said you couldn't do baptisms for the dead if you touched yourself, but the next bishop I had said it wasn't a big deal if it didn’t involve images and you didn’t do it too often. And when I read the church literature, I can't find any specific instruction. All For the Strength of Youth says is not to have sex outside of marriage and not to arouse your own desires outside of marriage. And I've never used masturbation to arouse myself. It provides a release so I can move on and focus on the important things.”

Was Kurt’s face on fire again? Of course it was on fire again. Because as soon as Elder Anderson used the word “masturbation” in reference to himself, Kurt experienced flashes of the previous night: of Elder Anderson’s soft moans, of the way he stroked himself under his garments, of the scent of his release.

It also brought into question why Elder Anderson was aroused in the first place. He said he didn't think about girls, but was it really that simple? He just got a hard-on and it wouldn't go away until something was done about it?

Okay, Kurt really needed to stop thinking about Elder Anderson touching himself and his motives for doing it. Because now just as much of Kurt’s blood was rushing down as up. He had to think of something decidedly unsexy something like … relatives. “My dad doesn't think masturbation is a violation of the law of chastity, but I always figured that was because he was a convert,” Kurt said.

“It might be. But I think converts often have the most accurate interpretations of doctrine because they’re coming into it fresh. They're not weighed down by all the different interpretations they've heard over the years. Whereas people like me, who grew up surrounded by other Mormons—I think half the stuff we assume is ‘doctrine’ is actually church culture. You know, like wearing white shirts when you pass the sacrament. There is no rule anywhere that non-missionaries have to wear white shirts. But my goodness, if a deacon showed up to church in a blue dress shirt instead of a white one, it was practically a scandal.”

“Just to be clear: you're comparing …” Kurt still couldn’t say the word. He could think it, but only quietly, in parentheses, like (masturbation). “You’re comparing whether or not someone plays with their Wurst to what color of shirt they choose to wear to church on Sunday?”

“Yeah, I guess I am. And the more I think about it, the more it works. if you do either of those things, people might judge you. So you can choose to wear a white shirt on Sunday just so that you don't make waves, just like you can choose not masturbate just so you don't have to defend yourself against an overly zealous bishop. But if you choose to do either of those things, you're not sinning against God.”

“I’m still not sure.”

“I know.” Elder Anderson touched his fingers to the back of Kurt’s hand. Given the topic under discussion, it should have embarrassed Kurt, or at a minimum made him flinch. Instead, Kurt found the touch reassuring. “And we don’t have to agree. You should do what’s right for you. I'm just concerned that you've been apparently going through this hassle of having wet dreams every few nights for your entire mission, which disrupts your sleep and interferes with the work. And I’m worried that the deeper reason you avoid doing anything to prevent this might not be so much because you think it’s a sin for everybody, but because you think it’s a worse sin for you. That you think because you’re gay, you don’t deserve to enjoy the body you live in as much as other people do. And that doesn’t strike me as fair.”

Kurt couldn’t say anything. It struck too deep. How did Elder Anderson know?

“I’m sorry. Maybe I’ve said too much,” said Elder Anderson, pulling his hand away.

Kurt wished he hadn’t. “No. You didn’t. It’s just … a lot to think about, is all. And we still have a whole day ahead of us.”

“You’re right. I should finish with the dishes.” Elder Anderson gave Kurt’s shoulder a little squeeze as he stood up.

Strange how reassuring it felt. The Kurt before Elder Anderson would be curled up in a ball on the floor by this point in the conversation. But somehow, he’d survived it. The resentment he’d felt against his companion had dissipated, too.

And far, far back in his mind, on the little shelf where Kurt kept thoughts he wasn’t ready to dwell upon, a part of him was glad that the same hand that offered Kurt reassurance had, the previous night, given Elder Anderson both relief and pleasure.

#klaine advent 2021 #klaine advent: core #wowbright writes fic #mormon!klaine #not sure about this one #I got hit by fatigue about halfway through #and it was too late for caffeine #yeah when i revise this i think it will be several mini conversations over several days

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mypoisonedvine · 4 years ago

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Love, Theoretically | Sebastian Stan x reader (Chapter 2)

read Chapter 1 here

series summary: having lost your husband, sister, and best friend all to the same extramarital affair, you ran away to a secluded villa in the Hungarian countryside to write and get a little time away from the life you’d left behind. you were only looking for peace and perhaps some inspiration for your novel, but instead you found an unlikely connection with the immigrant repairman– even though the two of you don’t speak the same language.

word count: 2.3k (exactly the same as last chapter, i’m proud of myself lol)

warnings: just fluff and ~pining~ for now

thanks again to @evnscvll for making this moodboard-- and this series is for her 3k celebration challenge so def check out her writing!

You should’ve known that you wouldn’t be able to force yourself to write, but after a quick shower to wash off the day’s journey, you decided there was nothing better to do but sit at the desk and hope for inspiration.

Your husband had never been very supportive of your writing, which is why you had struggled to complete your latest novel. He, like your publisher and many of your readers, wanted a sequel to your last book, in spite of the fact that you were adamant it was impossible. It was a complete story, even if the ending was ambiguous. There was no room for growth in the characters or the world of the story; just because readers wanted more didn’t mean that they would actually enjoy a forced product.

The publisher and your husband, however, shared a very strong opinion: the fans won’t care if it’s forced, and neither should you as long as it sells.�� But, they weren’t writers. You were. And you knew there were different stories you needed to tell… if only you could find the words for them.

You were a few pages in when you heard the stairs creaking outside your closed door. There was a quick knock at the door; you answered with an offer to come in.

“I was just wondering if you wanted some coffee,” Mrs. Alberti explained as she crossed the room, standing beside you at the desk. You nodded with a quick thank you as she set the cup and saucer down onto the wood. “Oh heavens, he’s working on the house again,” she suddenly groaned, motioning out the window.

You leaned over and nearly spit out your coffee when you saw Sebastian outside. He was only wearing some much-too-tight jeans, driving a hammer down onto wood as the sun cast orange light over his body. He was glistening with sweat, which was probably pretty uncomfortable for him but he looked damn good anyways.

“Is he always… like that?” you shuddered.

“Maybe I didn’t just hire him because he was cheap,” she shrugged, handing you a cloth. “Go soak this in cold water and bring it to him, he looks overheated.”

You should’ve questioned why she was giving you chores, but you just took the rag and did as she asked. He didn’t notice you walking out to him at first, but stopped when he did see you, waving quickly and setting down his hammer.

“For the heat,” you explained as you handed it to him.

“Ah, mulțumesc,” he nodded, accepting the rag with a smile.

As he wiped the sweat from his face, you found your gaze trailing over his arms, down his chest and abdomen. Jesus, how could this guy eat Mrs. Alberti’s cooking every day and still have washboard abs? When you looked back up to his face, he was looking right at you with a grin-- oh shit, had he caught you ogling? But then again, maybe he wanted you to ogle. Why else would he be doing housework so… shirtlessly?

“Wh-what are you working on?” you asked him to break the silence. He gave you a puzzled look. “Er, the wood,” you motioned to the work he was doing, “why?”

His face softened with understanding. “Construiesc un cadru nou pentru fereastră,” he explained, motioning vaguely to the house, “în partea de est a casei.”

“Right…” you nodded, realizing that you had no idea what he’d said. Clearly you hadn’t thought this through.

“Aici, permiteți-mi să vă arăt,” he said, grabbing a board and walking past you, motioning for you to follow him as he slung the rag over his shoulder. You figured you looked like a lost puppy trailing behind him like this.

He stopped when you reached the wall of the house, and grabbed part of the window frame; it creaked and moved as he wiggled it, clearly on the verge of falling off. Then, he held up the new board he had been hammering and you realized that it was going to replace the rotting portions of the frame.

“A intelege?” he smiled.

“Da!” you answered, and he laughed.

“Cred că asta contează ca român,” he shrugged.

“It’s good you’re fixing the window. I’m sure Mrs. Alberti appreciates everything you do.”

“Bătrâna îmi plătește rahat, dar sfârșesc trăind aici gratis.”

“Well, I should let you get back to it,” you decided as you stepped back with an uncomfortable smile.

“Nu te voi mai ține, sunt sigur că ești ocupat,” he said, and though you had no real way to interpret it, his tone didn’t seem to indicate that he was trying to stop you from going.

With a little wave and a heavy sense of god why am I such a dork?, you left him and returned indoors.

First nights in new places were always sort of surreal, but this was definitely less weird than the sleeper car of the train. You’d felt like a proper stowaway then, but you had a stronger feeling of belonging here… even if you didn’t quite feel like you had any place to call home at the moment.

As you laid in bed and looked at the room turned on its side, you found yourself missing your room. Your real room. It had been designed and decorated somewhat meticulously, but most of all you missed the things about it that you hadn’t put that kind of thought into: the random earrings on your bedside table, discarded casually before you went to sleep; the layers of blazers and skirts draped over the chair in the corner; the still-slightly-visible coffee stain on the corner of the rug, even though you’d spent hours trying to get it out.

Meanwhile, this room was so obviously not a space that people lived in, but just a space people passed through. Though nowhere near as sterile as a traditional hotel room, it had the same emptiness even with its personality-- specifically, a reflection of someone else’s personality rather than your own.

All that said, sleeping was pretty easy once you got yourself comfortable in the fluffy mattress, even if you were aware all through the night that you were not at home. So aware, even, that you weren’t surprised at all when you woke up in the new space for the first time. What you were surprised by was the sounds of heavy rain against your window, immediately dashing your plans for a morning jog. As much as it seemed apropos to type by the window instead and soak in the moody weather, you decided to head downstairs for a cup of coffee first. Already having forgotten where you had left off, you grabbed the pages you'd already written to reread with your breakfast as you slipped on some comfortable clothes and made your way down the creaky steps

Passing through the living area, it was impossible not to notice Sebastian sitting in one of the chairs, staring intently at a half-played chessboard. Stopping for a moment to try to determine what he was doing, he moved a piece and you realized he must be playing with himself.

Against himself, you interrupted your own thought, he's playing against himself… important distinction.

“You play chess?” you asked, pointing to the board.

“Şah,” he replied.

You pointed to the chair across from him. “Can I join you?”

“Luaţi loc,” he offered as he gestured to it as well, nodding in approval. You smiled and sat down as he reorganized the pieces back to the starting position.

“Negru?” he asked, pointing to the black pieces-- “Sau alb?”-- he pointed to the white.

“Um, black,” you decided, pointing to them since they were already on your side anyways.

“Tu primul,” he prompted you, and you moved your pawn. He moved his, and after that, it was long stretches of silence between moves. It didn’t feel awkward anymore, though; even between two people who share a language, chess is usually a silent affair.

“Check,” you announced as your bishop came into range of his king. He looked up from the board and gave you a puzzled look. “The bishop, see?” you demonstrated, tracing a line through the air over the diagonal squares which led from your piece to his.

“Ahh,” he nodded, stroking his chin as he considered his next move. It called additional attention to the shadow of stubble which dusted over his jaw.

He maneuvred a rook in the path of your bishop, and you settled back into your chair and you pondered your options.

The next hour went by oddly quickly. Not in a rushed way, just in a way that made you wonder how it had already been an hour.

“Şah,” he informed you as his knight threatened your king. You weren’t sure if it was supposed to mean ‘check’ or ‘checkmate,’ but since you were able to capture his knight with a pawn, it was definitely just a check.

Instead of mourning his knight, he grinned and moved a rook forward, capturing the aforementioned pawn and trapping your king for good. You gasped a little as you realized you’d fallen right into his trap.

“Şah-Mat,” he declared triumphantly. That definitely meant ‘checkmate’; you could tell by the smug look on his face as he crossed his arms and leaned back into his chair.

“You got me, man, that was sneaky,” you smiled. Offering your hand for a shake, you looked up at him: “Good game.”

He grabbed your hand and shook it, squeezing just tight enough that you wondered if you were the only one noticing a certain energy to the air. “Bun joc,” he replied with a nod and a smile.

He let go of your hand after lingering just a little too long, his fingers brushing over yours for an electric moment.

Now the silence was awkward again, as the two of you sat in the high-backed chairs, staring across the table at each other.

“So, you really don’t speak any English at all, huh?” you considered aloud. He looked back at you vacantly. “English? Even one word?” you lifted one finger as a symbol.

“Halloo,” he replied-- apparently a broken attempt at ‘hello.’ You laughed a little.

“Yes, that counts! Did you learn any English in school?”

“Televiziune,” he replied.

“Ah yes,” you nodded, “I know what that is. Television; I’m a big fan myself.”

“Puteți vorbi un singur cuvânt de limba română?” he asked you, raising one finger as well. Turnabout is fair play, after all.

“You mean other than ‘da’? Or ‘salut’?” you asked with a laugh.

“Pentru a fi corect, acestea sunt cuvinte,” he shrugged.

“Teach me,” you requested. “Just one word.”

You looked around the room, settling on a lamp. “What is this? In Romanian-- română?”

“Lampă,” he replied.

“Okay, well, that one isn’t very exciting,” you frowned. “Um, what about this?” you bent down from your chair, picking up one corner of the rug.

“Covor,” he answered, leaning down with you to run his hand over the soft shag.

“Covor,” you repeated, surely butchering it.

“Da,” he smiled. Okay, maybe you didn’t butcher it so bad, or maybe he was just being nice.

“Can you teach me more?” you asked, hoping it wasn’t too demanding.

“Uhhh,” he stalled, looking around the room. Finally, he pointed to the fireplace. “Vatră.”

“Vatră, fireplace,” you tried to memorize it as he said it.

You pointed to the window. “What’s the window called?”

“Fereastră.”

You pointed to the stairway. “Scară,” he informed you, smiling a little. You hoped this wasn’t boring for him, because you were actually having a bit of fun.

You pointed to his feet. He furrowed his brow a little and lifted one, grabbing his shoe. You nodded; “Pantof,” he explained.

You grabbed your blouse and shook it a little, appreciating the puffs of cool air that rolled down your chest; “Bluză.”

You pointed to him; “Sebastian.”

You already knew that, but it was interesting to hear the way he said it versus Mrs. Alberti’s pronunciation. “Yes, that’s an English name too,” you told him, “but pronounced differently…”

You wondered if your name had another pronunciation or translation, so you pointed to yourself; “Frumoasă,” he said, a little slower, a little more thoughtfully.

“Is that the Romanian equivalent to my name-- or does it mean ‘woman’?” you asked. He just smiled vacantly.

“This,” you pointed to the book, “what is this called?”

“Carte,” he answered. “Engleză?”

“Book,” you replied.

“...book…” he said slowly, contemplatively.

Suddenly inspired, you grabbed the loose pages of manuscript that you’d laid on the small table beside you. “Book,” you repeated, flipping through the pages. He seemed confused. “My book,” you clarified, pointing back and forth from yourself the papers. “I’m writing this-- that’s why I’m here.”

“Ah!” his face lit up with recognition. “Ar trebui să scrii o carte!”

“Yeah,” you nodded. “I’m a writer; or, I’m trying to be. My last book did… better than my first, at least.”

“Ce fel de carte este?” he asked. You looked at him with confusion to indicate you weren’t sure what he was asking. “Uhh, book… este--” he made a sad face, rubbing under his eyes like a cartoon character’s weeping-- “sau--” he fake-laughed.

You laughed, actually, at his charades. “It’s a thriller, it’s crime--” you thought for a moment, then made the motion of stabbing someone with a knife.

His eyes got wider. “Este… erotic?”

You choked a little, realizing that your hand movement was… more ambiguous than you originally intended. “No!” you blurted out suddenly. “No, it’s… crime, mystery--”

You looked around and saw a magnifying glass resting on the side table by your chair; grabbing it, you held it to your face and gave your best quizzical look.

“Oh! Crimă!” he grinned. “Detectiv?”

“Yes, yes, there’s a detective,” you sighed satisfactorily, “and absolutely no handjobs.”

shamelessly tagging the people who liked chapter 1! @mariahthelioness29 @navybrat817 @navegandoaciegas @mandalorianspace @2smittinkittin @maizyistrash @honeygingergemini

#sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x y/n #sebastian stan fluff #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan fic

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hotchgan · 4 years ago

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How to Save a Life: Chapter 3

Summery: Chris and Aaron get engaged but one fatal car crash changes everything.

A/N: This is connected to my two other fics called The Text Message and The Text Message pt 2. And yes, I stole the title from the song called How to Save a Life.

Taglist: @ellyhotchner @unionjackpillow @eleanorbloom

Warnings: Car crash, injuries, coma, drunk driver, cancer

Here is part one and part two!

And just like that, Aaron’s whole life changes it a heartbeat. His fiancé, Chris, is in a coma and needs a new heart. Aaron looks at the heart monitor. It’s beeping. It seems kind of wrong for the monitor to keep beeping even though he needs a new heart. Aaron can feel tears coming in his eyes. Why does everyone he loves always end up dying?

“C-can’t we put him on a transplant list? H-he’s really in bad shape so it won’t be long until he gets a heart ... r-right?” Aaron asks the doctor. The doctor looks at him sadly.

“Well we did but it still going to take a while for him to get a heart. There’s even a chance his heart right now can fail before he has a chance of getting a new one”, the doctor replies. Aaron silently gulps and looks back at Chris.

“His heart is still beating”, Aaron says softly. He places his head on Chris’s chest and feels his heart. It was the only thing that helps him fall asleep at night. His heartbeat.

“Wh-what about Blake? The driver?” Aaron asks the doctor. The doctor debates in his mind if he should tell Aaron or not.

“Well .. I’m afraid I can’t tell you that”, the doctor replies. The doctor shoves his hands into his pocket and stares at the ground. Aaron stares at the doctor and slowly realizes why he is acting nervous.

“He’s alive, isn’t he? That bastard is still alive?” Aaron asks. Aaron stands up. The doctor looks back at Aaron.

“Where is he?” Aaron asks. The doctor puts his hands up, defensively.

“Sir, sit down please”, the doctor says but Aaron doesn’t listen to him.

“Where is he?” Aaron asks again but this time louder.

“Don’t make me call security. Right now, your fiancé needs you. What if he wakes up and sees you’re not here”, the doctor says to Aaron. There is a very slim chance Chris will wake up without a new heart but he had to say it to calm Aaron down. Aaron looks at him and sits back down.

“I’m sorry. I- he’s going to jail, right? I’m pretty sure he was drunk”, Aaron asks the doctor.

“Yes. He has to stay here for a while before the cops take him to jail”, the doctor replies to Aaron. He nods and looks back at Chris.

“What can I do? There has to be something I can do”, Aaron says to the doctor.

“I’m afraid all we can do is wait”, the doctor replies. Aaron sighs and holds Chris’s hand. The doctor’s right. All he can do right now is wait and pray that his fiancé gets a new heart soon.

Half an hour passes by and suddenly the door opens. Aaron who was sleeping on the hospital bed, next to Chris, woke up and saw a doctor push a patient inside the room. The patient was Blake.

“Wh-what’s he doing here?” Aaron asks the doctor.

“Aaron ... I-“ Blake was about to say before he saw Chris. He was still lying on the hospital bed, unconscious, with a tube down his throat.

“I- I’m sorry .. I really am. I didn’t know what I was thinking. And I swear, I didn’t mean to crash you and Chris. I just lost my job so I got drunk and ... I’m sorry”, Blake apologizes. Aaron glares at him with disgust.

“You came here to tell me that you’re sorry? As if that’s going to fix anything? My fiancé is on a heart transplant list because of you! You cheated on me and then you crash your car into us. I hope you have a fun time in jail”, Aaron spats at Blake. Blake flinches.

“Agent Hotchner, Blake won’t be going to jail because he ... well I think you should say it”, the doctor saus to Blake. Aaron looks at the both of them confused.

“What do you mean he won’t go to jail? You practically killed Chris! You should be arrested for intoxicated man slaughter”, Aaron says.

“I- I want to give my heart to Chris!”, Blake says quickly before Aaron could interrupted him. Aaron freezes and stares at Blake.

“What?” Aaron asks. Blake looks at the doctor, nervously.

“Before you could make a decision .. if Chris doesn’t get a heart in this month, he may die. And the transplant list could take years. You don’t have a lot of options here”, the doctor says to Aaron. Aaron looks at the doctor and then back to Blake.

“You want to get out of jail, don’t you? You think you could just take the easy way out, huh?” Aaron asks to Blake.

“What- Aaron, I want to help you. Please, let me help you”, Blake begs. Aaron wasn’t lying about him not wanting to go to jail. But Blake also felt guilty of all the pain he caused Aaron. He wants to do something in return.

“Get out ...”, Aaron says slowly.

“Agent Hotchner-“, the doctor starts saying.

“Get him out ... before I kill him with my bare hands”, Aaron says to the doctor. The doctor nods and wheels Blake out of the room. Aaron sighs and sits back down on the chair. He looks back at Chris. He could take the heart but Aaron can’t marry a man who has the heart of the person who hurt them, both. And he’s sure Chris can’t live with that, either. Aaron sighs and finally decides to leave the hospital room. He needs to take a walk, to clear his head.

Aaron goes outside of the hospital and walks towards a bench. He sits down and looks outside. It was early in the morning, early enough to see the sun rising. Chris always woke up and early and made Aaron to do the same so they both could watch the sun rising. Aaron hears someone in a wheelchair come beside him. Aaron turns around to see a twenty year old with bald hair in a wheelchair.

“It’s pretty isn’t it .. the sun?” The boy in the wheel chair says. Aaron looks back at the sun.

“Yeah ...”, Aaron replies. The boy turns his his wheelchair a little to face Aaron.

“I’m Mateo”, the boy in the wheelchair says as he sticks his hand out. Aaron faces him and shakes his hand.

“Aaron”, The older man says as he shakes Mateo’s hand.

“What are you doing out here?” Mateo asks.

“My .. my fiancé and I got into a car crash”, Aaron replies. Mateo nods.

“Oh, that explains the cast”, Mateo says, pointing at Aaron’s leg. Aaron gives a small smile.

“Where’s your fiancé?” Mateo asks. Aaron hesitates before replying.

“He’s in a coma ... he’s on a heart transplant list”, Aaron replies.

“Oh, sorry man”, Mateo says to Aaron.

“What about you?” Aaron asks the kid next to him.

“Brain cancer. I have around a month left”, Mateo replies.

“Sorry”, Aaron says softly. Mateo grins.

“It’s fine. I’ve been fighting for a year. My family left after they couldn’t convince me to give up. At least they keep paying for my hospital bills”, Mateo jokes. Mateo looks at Aaron for a while.

“Do you want my heart?” Mateo asks, casually.

“What?” Aaron asks. Did he heard that right? Did a kid who he met five minutes ago wanted to give his heart to his fiancé? Who he hasn’t even met?

“Why not? I only have a month left. And you seem like a cool person. Are you like a lawyer or something?” Mateo asks.

“I’m an FBI agent”, Aaron replies. Mateo eye’s widen.

“Man, that’s even cooler”, Mateo says. Aaron grins at the boy.

“Yeah but I can’t take your heart. Someone else offered me theirs”, Aaron says to kid.

“Really? Who?” Mateo asks.

“The guy who crashed us. He’s also my ex”, Aaron replies.

“Damn, what did he want? To die before he could go to jail?” Mateo asks. Aaron chuckles.

“Come on. I want to do something good before I die. Take my heart and let your ex go to jail”, Mateo says, trying to convince the older man. Aaron looks at him.

“I- ... ok but only if you want to”, Aaron says, finally convinced. Mateo smiles making Aaron smile back. A kid who he met around ten minutes ago wants to give his healthy heart to man he hasn’t met. And Aaron let him.

#aaron hotchner #criminal minds #aaron hotch hotchner #hotch #aaron hotchner x oc #aaron hotchner x male oc #hotch x oc #Hotch/Chris #tw car accident #tw injuries #tw coma #tw drunk driver #tw cancer

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primroseprime2019 · 3 years ago

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The Little Girl and The Dinosaurs

On a dark cold December night, there was little four and a half American/Italian girl was coloring on a piece of paper in the carpet near the fire. She has dark brown hair and blue eyes, and slightly tan skin; she was wearing pink nightgown and a silver whistle attached to her neck. Her name was Valentina Rosalina Grady and she was waiting for her parents to come from work. Truth be told, this was no ordinary little girl. She was different from the rest of the kids in her neighborhood. She had unbelievable powers. Ever since she was born, strange things happened. Animals from shape and sizes would come near her and tried to make her smile or laugh. And when she was in the backyard, flowers and plants would grow. It was really strange but her parents accepted her gift but they had to keep it a secret. So her parents decided to keep her home schooled so the kids in her school won't be scared at her.

Speaking of her parents, they were really good people. Her dad was name Oscar Grady. He had light brown hair and adventurous blue eyes. He used to be a Navy soldier but he retired to become a collage history teacher. He loved to teach others to learn but during his free time, he would play with his baby girl and make her smile while teaching her how to do combat to control her powers and even though she was small, she was a fast learner. She was smart for a little girl but her curiosity got the better of her and she would get into a little trouble. Her mom was name Alma. She was a beautiful Italian woman. She has dark brown hair and warm brown eyes. She was a doctor and was very kind to her patients. Every man wanted to marry her but she chose Oscar because he was very funny and smart. Valentina loved her parents with all her heart and soul and would stay by their side no matter what. Well, except when she had to go to the bathroom.

Then a teenage girl with blond hair and chocolate brown eyes; She wore a red sweater, brown pants and cowboy boots. She was about the age of eighteen. She came out from the kitchen. "Val, it's almost past yer bed time." She said in a sweet western accent.

Val looked at her almost pleadingly, "Awww… but Abby, can I stay up fow five mowe minutes? Mommy and Daddy pwomise to wead me a bed time stowy."

Abby smiled at her, "Alright but remember yer ma and pa ain't gonna like it to see their little baby girl still awake and energetic."

Val smiled brightly, "Thanks Abby! You'we the best babysittew evew!"

Abby's real name was Abigail Starious. She lived down the block with her big brother, Joshua or Josh, close to Valentina's home. She and her brother moved from their family ranch to study in the big city to be doctors. Abby worked as a full time babysitter for Valentina also a waitress in a cafe and her brother Joshua worked as a mechanic, for cars. They knew about Valentina's power and would keep it a secret because they took a liking to her.

"Ah shucks, yer making me blush." Abby smiled then she noticed Valentina's drawing, "Watcha drawing there Val?"

Val showed Abby a red long neck animal with a crocked drawing of a tree. "It's a Ba-wo-sau-wus." She said trying to say the name correctly. It's correct name was Barosaurus.

"Is it a dinosaur?" Abby asked playfully, knowing the answer. Val loved dinosaurs so much that she had stuffed dinosaur toys in her bed room. She always dreamed of meeting one in Jurassic World but her parents were busy with their jobs so they didn't have time to go there. Not that she was complaining but Val understood her parents and would listen to them always.

"Uh-huh, they awe pwant eatews and they awe weally big!" Val said with a big and bright smile.

"Wow! I bet they can reach the tallest of all trees!" Abby said playfully.

Val nodded, "Yup! But they have to stand on theiw back wegs."

Abby smiled before going to kitchen to make some hot coco. Val went up to the sofa and looks at the window to wait for her parents. Val waited and waited and waited but her parents didn't come home yet. She fell asleep when the clock strikes nine. Abby became worried. Why didn't Mr. and Mrs. Grady come home yet? Abby pickd up Val and puts her to bed. She looked at her phone and sends an e-mail to Mr. Grady.

Mr. Grady, it's me Abby. I was wonderin' why ya aren't home yet with Mrs. Grady. If ya'll have an extra shift in yer work, I'll watch Val till tomorrow.

-Abby

Abby went to the couch and fell asleep as she waited for the text of Oscar. On the next day, Abby woke up and prepared breakfast. It was pancakes for breakfast. She heard little footsteps coming down the stairs. She turned and smiled to see Val holding her stuff honey colored raptor doll named Honey.

"Mornin' Val," Abby gave Val her breakfast. Val sat down and yawned before eating her breakfast. Abby opened the mini TV on top of the counter and let Val watch Disney Junior. Then the news appeared.

"I interrupt this program for this breaking new. Two married couples were killed on a car accident when a truck hit them last night. Police discovered the truck driver was drunk. The two married couples did not survive the crash."

Abby froze. 'Oh God! Please don't tell me!' She thought in fear.

"The married couples have IDs and their names are Oscar Grady and Alma Grady. The drunken driver was survived and his sentenced will be in soon after he recovers."

Abby's eyes widen in horror. She looks at Val and her heart broke at the sight. Val's eyes were wide as she broke down in tears. Abby comforted Val as she and Val would have to visit the police station to inform them about Mr. and Mrs. Grady having a four and a half year old daughter and retrieve their bodies to be buried. The funeral started early morning. It was cold and the snow fall down at them slowly. Val was wearing a black dress and shoes. She was in a graveyard with men and women that were friends with her parents. Abby was there by her side, wearing a black dress and her brother Josh, who had green eyes and blonde hair, was wearing a black clothes as well. Val placed a red rose on her mother and father's coffins as they were buried. Val put her picture in the middle, on her parents' grave, so they can see it in heaven above.

After she did she went to Abby and Josh and started crying, Abby and Josh comforted her. As the funeral was over everyone went home. Val was staying with Abby and Josh for a while until they can find any relatives that Val had. But the problem was that no one knew who was the closest family member.

Val was sitting on a couch, wearing her black dress. She has a red scarf that belongs to her mother; her whistle was buried in it, and her father's black beanie hat. She had dry tear stains on her face as she looked at a picture of her with her parents. Josh and Abby watched her with sympathetic looks.

"Is there any news 'bout her relatives?" Josh asked.

Abby shook her head, "Not yet, I'm still lookin'."

Josh sighed and he looked at Valentina sadly. Val wiped her tears away. "We can't just stand here and do nothin'." He looks at Abby, "We have to find her a family or at least part of her family. Do you remember if Mr. and Mrs. Grady havin' relatives?"

Abby tapped her chin with her index finger before snapping, "That's it! I remember seeing a picture of Mr. Grady with his brother. I think his name was Owen and he works at Jurassic World."

Josh smiled, "That's great! Do you know his number?"

Abby shook her head, "No but I bet Oscar has his number on his phone."

Josh nodded and the two went upstairs in Valentina's temporally room and went to her father's things and grabbed his cell phone before looking for Owen Grady.

"Let's see," Abby looked at the names inside the phone. "Here it is." Abby found the name Owen Grady and she calls him.

In the Isla of Nublar, a man with green eyes and light brown, hair wearing a blue shirt, with a black vest full of pockets, brown pants and shoes. He was in his bungalow fixing his motorbike. Then another man came. "Owen! Still enjoying your afternoon?" he asked with a strong African/French accent.

Owen wipes out a sweat from his forehead, "Yeah, taking a break from the girls, Barry." He throws his wrench in a toolbox.

Then Owen's cell phone rang. He picks it up to see a picture of a man with brown hair and blue eye. "Oscar? Huh, it's been long since I seen him."

"How long you haven't seen him?" Barry asked.

Owen counted his fingers, "I think about sixteen years."

Barry rolled his eyes at him as Owen answered his phone, "Hey Oscar! It's been long time since we spoke."

"Ah…howdy," Abby's voice answered, "Is this Owen Grady?"

"Yeah this is Owen and who are you and how the hell do you know my name and also how did you get my brother's phone?"

"I'm Abigail Starious." She answered, "I know yer brother because I and my brother, Joshua, lived down the blocks close to his house."

"Uh-huh, yeah and why are you calling in me using my brother's phone?" Owen asked.

"Didn't anyone tell you?" Abby asked.

"Tell me what?"

"Owen, your brother Oscar and his wife died in a car accident."

Owen froze, his phone was still in his ear and his mouth was hanging open and his eyes were wide as dinner plates, "When did this happen?"

"A week ago," Abby said, "Look, I know we just met but yer brother has a little four in a half little girl, who needs a family and yer the closest family she's got."

Owen didn't say anything. He and Oscar use to work at the Navy together until Oscar retired to be a history teacher in a university college and married an Italian woman name Alma. He and Oscar rarely talk due to the fact they were very busy in work but now his big brother was dead along with his wife and now his niece- one that he didn't know he had- was now an orphan.

"What's her name?" Owen asked, wanting know his niece's name.

"Her name is Valentina Rosalina." Abby said, "So are you going to take care of her? She's a very sweet girl and well behaves."

Owen thought about it. He is the only family left for his niece and he did took care of raptors, how hard can it be?, "Alright, I'll send her a ferry ticket next week to bring her here in the Isla Nublar."

Owen could hear Abby and Josh cheering happily, "Thank you! Josh and I are gonna get her a passport. She is goin' to be so happy!"

"Alright and thanks for the information." Owen said as he turned off his cell phone.

"What was that all about?" Barry asked.

Owen looked at him before saying, "Oscar and his wife Alma died in a car accident." Barry's eyes widen. "And I have a niece, that I didn't know I had, named Valentina Rosalina." Owen looked at Barry, "I'm the only family member she has left."

Barry's mouth was hanging open in shock, "Owen, you're going to raise a little girl that you barely know while working with Raptors?"

Owen shrugs, "Hey, I raised the girls and I'm still alive." He said, "How hard it is taking care of a little girl?"

Barry was about to answer but Owen quickly raised his right hand and said blankly, "don't say it."

Barry chuckled, "And how are you going to get a ferry ticket?"

"Easy, I'll asked Claire to give me and that doesn't work I could ask Simon Masrani." Owen looked at him, "But first can you help me buy the things that little girls like." Barry rolled his eyes but he decided to help because that little girl might not survive here. Barry and Owen went to the park to buy stuff for Val.

Meanwhile, Abby and Josh told Val everything. Val was shocked, happy, and worried. Shocked that she had an uncle that she didn't know she had, happy that she had an uncle and she wasn't alone and yet worried that her uncle might not like her. Abby helped Val pack her things like clothes, some toys, her Mandora Lute and her pink Ocarina. Val likes to play music. Her mom would teach her during her free time.

Josh bought Val a passport. They were lucky because Oscar used to work in the Navy. Owen was able to make Claire give him a ticket for Val after hearing the event and send it next week. After a few weeks, Josh was driving his car with Abby in the front seat. Valentina was wearing a red t-shirt with gray long sleeves, brown combat pant and orange shoes. She has mother's red scarf and her father's black beanie hat on. Her dark hair was tied into pigtails. As Josh parked the car, they went inside and saying their goodbyes to Val.

Abby was hugging little Val, "Bye sweet pea, I'm gonna miss you so much."

"I'll miss you too." Valentina said then she hugged Josh. "Bye, Josh."

Josh hugged her back before he let her go and he took out a small red box with a ribbon, "Yer Pa wanted to give ya this on yer birthday but since he can't I was wonderin' if ya wanted yer birthday gift a little early."

Val took the box and opened it to reveal a raptor claw fossil necklace. Val smiled and she put it own. She loved raptors as they were her favorite dinosaur. "Thanks Josh."

Josh smiled until the airport voice speaker's announce, "Ladies and Gentlemen the plane will leave in twenty minutes."

"Well, go on, ya don't wanna be late." Abby said with a smile.

"Yeah, yer gonna see many dinosaurs there." Josh then added, "And if somethin' cashes you...run." He whispered the last part, alarming Val.

"Josh!" Abby scolded.

Josh chuckled, "I'm just kiddin'. Jurassic World has tight security; ain't nothing gonna hurt ya."

Val nodded and went in line while she waved at Abby and Josh. Val sat near the window and put on her seat belt when the airplane took off. Val looked at the clouds in the sky. She took out the raptor necklace and held it tight. "Please, please, please, please like me." Val whispers before going to sleep.

#fanfiction #sad #family #jurassic world #my ocs #the little girl and the dinosaurs

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immortalbarnes · 4 years ago

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A Cabin For Two | Chapter 4: You’ll Never Know (part 2)

Bucky Barnes x Reader

summary: Sam visits for dinner, and you tell the story of how you and Bucky met part 2

warnings: angst, gore, dark themes, violence, reference to smut

A/N: low-key hate this but it was hard to write

***bold italicized indicates flashback

masterlist

The second you said that Steve’s eyes were wide open.

“Agent Y/L/N, you mean to tell me that you and Sergeant Barnes have not only been sleeping together during your deployment here, but he also managed to get you pregnant?’ The general interjects furiously, but still keeping his cool as you’re clearly having a meltdown.

“How long have you known?” Steve asks, ignoring the other man’s pressing questions.

“A few days,” You say, trying to calm yourself down, “I had morning sickness the past few days, and…”

You unbutton your blazer revealing a small baby bump.

“... I’m already showing. Nurse Linda decided that was the only possible reason. I wanted to break the news to B-Buck…:”

You trail off once more, remembering that your lover is now gone, and the tears begin to fight their way back.

“Hey, Y/N, it’s going to be okay,” Steve pulls you back into a warm embrace, “We’re going to send you home, so you can be with your family. I’ll be with you once the war’s over.”

“I’m afraid we can’t do so just yet.” The general interrupts once more, “I hate to make matters worse, but the mission failed and we need someone to go back into the village and gather intel on where Zola might be now. Agent Y/N is the only one capable of the job.”

Steve instantly objects, “General she can’t-”

“No. I will.” You step away from Steve, “Bucky would want me to. One final mission… For him.”

“Thank you, Agent,” says the general, “We’ll get you briefed tomorrow. Get your rest.”

…

“Oh my god, Y/N, I’m so sorry. I never knew.” Sam saus wholeheartedly.

You realize you’re tearing up at the memory as Bucky shifts closer to you and pulls you into him. You feel his metal arm and recall the times he made love to you with all flesh. How he loved to put his warm hands on your cheeks, and the only chill you had was from the air. Before you both were turned into monsters.

“Sorry if it’s too invasive, but what happened to your child?”

Words became tricky.

“Well Hydra was expecting me back in that village, and when I arrived they captured me. Which was the start of all this for me…”

…

Everything is cold when you come to consciousness. You open your eyes to a dimly lit room, and you’re on what feels like an operating table. Above you hangs a towering contraption holding a plethora of needles containing a rainbow of chemicals. To your right is a side table adorned in unwashed tools, and something wrapped into an extremely bloody towel.

You try to open your mouth, but then all the pain sets in.

It feels like you’re on fire everywhere. Yet the center of it all seems to be your pelvis. Similar to period cramps, but nothing like you’ve ever felt before. But how could it be your time of the month? You’re pregnant for christ’s sake.

“Ah you’re awake.” A thick German accent greets you.

“W-where am I? What happened?” You try to remember what happened before you lost consciousness. All that comes to you is returning to the small mountain village for your mission, walking into the hostile you were to rest in, and entering a room full of soldiers… All with a certain symbol on their chest.

Hydra.

“Why am I here? What do you want from me?” You ask, now with all the pieces put together.

“Let me introduce myself first, Agent Y/L/N, my name is Dr. Zola. But, you may have known that from your previous mission.”

How did he know about that?

“You might be confused as to how I know that, but trust me, Miss Y/N, I know everything about you. We’ve been tracking you since you were deployed to Austria. Someone as talented as you will have a perfect place in our team. Along with your loverboy of course.”

“Bucky? How do you know that? What do you want with him?”

Mr. Barnes is one of the finest shooters the American Army has ever seen, and with you, the best spy for the allies, and the serum your golden boy has, you two will be unstoppable. Hydra history will be made with you two. World history will be changed with you two. It only helps that you two are romantically involved.”

“Were romantically involved,” You almost choke, “I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Bucky is gone.”

“Oh, on the contrary, for we took the sergeant before Cap’s boys could find him. He lost his arm due to the fall, but that’s only a minor setback. Similar to yours. Easy fixes.

“Bucky’s alive?! Where is he?!” You were willing to do anything just to see that he’s okay, “Wait, what setback did I have?”

“The embryo within you, but we already handled that while you were knocked out. It won’t be an issue now, or ever again.”

“You aborted my child!?” You wanted to scream and thrash, but you were in so much pain, and you just now noticed that you were held down by restraints.

“You are now unable to have children, but there’s no need to worry! You’ll never have the need to.”

Right then you hear a piercing scream. From a man.

Bucky.

“WAS THAT BUCKY!?” Suddenly you felt nothing but rage course through you. You thrashed and somehow pulled off the restainted keeping you at the table.

You lunged toward the doctor as he began to yell.

“GUARDS! THE SERUM IS ALREADY WORKING ON HER! HELP!”

You reached him and grabbed his neck, closing up his airway.

“What serum!? Where is Bucky!?”

Before he could choke out an answer, two strong men grabbed you and yanked you back. In a wave of anger, you elbow one square on the nose, then turn to face the other one. You had no clue where this strength had come from, but you were ready to use it to its fullest.

You start at the second guard, but he quickly dodges and pulls out some sort of weapon and flips a switch at its base. The tool began surging with electricity and before you could react, he stuck you down onto the ground.

“Oh, Miss Y/N, you have so much potential, but don’t worry, soon you’ll be the soldier you were destined to be.” You heard Zola say before a needle was stuck in your arm and everything went black.

…

It hurt to revisit this, but some part of you knew you needed to tonight. Bucky just pulled you tighter and you are comforted by his strong scent.

“Do you remember your first time seeing Bucky?” Sam asks, cautious of his words.

“No.” You answer, “I went through the serum process faster than Bucky because they started the first time he was kidnapped, so I was on so many drugs that’s all I remember until my first missions.”

“I remember the first time I saw her.” Bucky pipes up. He’s been silent recently, and you were worried about him, but you both trusted Sam enough with these memories. “It was not long after she woke up in the facility for the first time, and it was the first time I broke out of Hydra’s control.”

… Bucky’s POV…

“Хорошая работа, солдат, теперь добей его.” Good work soldier, now finish him, one of the officers ordered me to do.

He had put up a good fight, for a normal man, but as The Asset, he was no challenge for me. I don’t know who this man is, but he’s my mission, and I must finish. I draw my gun and aim at his limp body on the floor, struggling to flee.

Right as I’m about to pull the trigger, a side door opens to reveal two officers dragging a limp body of a woman across the hall.

“Restrain her and check her vitals.” The Doctor orders from the room the trio exited from.

This woman looked familiar, but how would I know? I have no family, for I am The Asset. All I know is war, but this woman brings me a sense of peace. Just looking at her makes me feel… warm.

“Y/N?” I hear myself mutter. I don’t know where that came from, but it feels right. Y/N. How beautiful. Like her.

Wait. I am not The Asset. I am James Barnes. I’m Bucky. Why am I here? Why is she here!? She should be back at camp.

Snapping out of my thoughts, I realize all the officers in the room are charging at me.

“Удержи его! Он помнит!” Restrain him! He’s remembering!

Before I could fight any of the approaching officers, all I felt was electricity. Losing all feeling in my body, I collapse to the ground and get dragged off.

“протри его. начать сначала” Wipe him. Start over.

…

After harrowing stories and some lighter topics, Sam retired to his own house. It left you and Bucky in a bittersweet state, for you were revisiting all the nights of torture and torment Hydra conducted between the two of you, but you were thankful you were now safe, secluded, and satisified.

You were sat up in bed with Alpine on your lap reading To Kill A Mockingbird (Peter Parker recommended it to you after he read it for English class), with the subtle sounds of Bucky brushing his teeth coming from the bathroom.

“Y/N?” Bucky is now leaning against the door frame of the bathroom.

“Yes?” You put in your bookmark and set the novel to the side.

“Why did you go on that mission for me?” There’s a tremble in his voice, as if he’s been holding onto that question for eternity.

“Something within me I guess. I was so devastated about losing you, but every part of me was telling me to go on that mission.”

“But…” He chokes on his words. “You could’ve been saved. You could’ve gone home and settled down, like you wanted. Like we always wanted.”

“Oh, Bucky,” You pull the covers, and Alpine, off and go to him, “How could I? I would’ve never looked at another man the same. How could I? When I lost you, I lost a piece of myself. And Hydra would’ve found me anyways. They were tracking me just like Zola said.”

You pull him into you and hold his head against your shoulder. Bucky was significantly taller than you and extremely broad and muscular, but when he needed to be held he became small and fragile. It hurt your heart to see him like this, but you were there for him for whatever he needed.

The two of you stood in silence for what felt like hours just basking in each other’s warmth. Until Bucky spoke up again.

“Do you miss our child?”

“Everyday.”

You were the happiest you’ve ever been when Linda told you you were pregnant. Nothing made you happier than the idea of settling down with the man of your dreams in the suburbs with a couple of kids and a white picket fence. You were itching to tell Bucky the news, but once you got the news that Bucky didn’t make it back from the mission, all you had left of him was your child. You swore to raise them to be just like their father, but Hydra took your ability away to have children away… Just like they took away your Bucky.

When the government gifted you this cabin and land, you had to make some agreements. You weren’t allowed to leave the country without notifying the military, you had to attend monthly psychological evaluations, and some other precautionary procedures. The one that broke your heart the most was that you weren’t allowed to adopt or foster a child because the government feared you could train them to become the next generation of Hydra killers. Just another precaution.

A precaution that made your heart twist.

You were taken out of your deep thought with the feeling of fur rubbing against your ankles. Looking down you see your pristine white fur baby crossing through your legs, causing you both to laugh.

“Thank the Lord the government didn’t stop us from having kids with four legs.” You joke, trying to make light of the haunting memories. Bucky chuckles and picks Alpine up.

“At least he can’t talk back like a child.” He adds.

…

You and Bucky lay in your tent stark naked huddling for each other's warmth under a thin blanket. Breathless after your late night “fonduing”.

“What do you want after the war is over?” Bucky asks.

“To start a family.” You answer with ease, “I know I’m a military girl, but I want to settle down and have kids.”

“I do too. Not that many people know that because I’m such a flirt.” He chuckles.

“Quite the reputation you must have back home, Barnes.”

He pulls you closer, “But as soon as this war is over, I’m taking you to the suburbs and we’ll get a nice place with a fence and a garden. And have kids.”

“One boy and one girl?” You ask.

“Perfect. Can we name the girl Winnifred? After my mother.”

“We can call her Winnie for short.”

“I knew you were perfect for me.” He sighs happily, “That’s all the family I need. You, me, and a couple of tikes.”

“Maybe a dog too.” You add.

…

Maybe this is all the family you need.

#bucky barnes #the winter soldier #Bucky Barnes reader #Bucky Barnes x reader #Bucky Barnes fic #fanfic #Bucky Barnes imagine #the winter soldier x reader #Bucky Barnes angst #Bucky Barnes smut #bucky barnes fanfiction #avengers #marvel #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction #avengers fanfiction

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gaamagirl565 · 5 years ago

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Matters of the heart S2 ep 7

Matters of the heart Season 2 Episode 7 How the tides turn Special thanks to @1a-lchemist for help with the Romanian {OPENING CREDITS} {Zapada comes down the stairs to see Isaiah sewing something} Zapada: Copilul meu? Isaiah: Oh! Good morning Zapada! Zapada: what happens here? Isaiah: oh, I’m sewing something for my baby brother or sister! Zapada: May I see? {Isaiah holds up a tiny red bear with jingle bells attached to the limbs} Zapada: Ohhh! Isaiah! That is so…*sobs* Isaiah:...Zapada? {Zapada pulls him into a tight hug} Isaiah: ACK! Zapada: Copilul meu dulce! {Varian walks in with a cup of tea but stops when he sees them} Isaiah: Dad! Wait! Save me! {Varian sneaks back out} Isaiah: Ah!..W-wait!...no! You traitor!! {Varian smirks and goes to walk away when a villager runs through the front door; Varian drops his teacup and Zapada and Isaiah are immediately at attention} Villager: Varian! Sir! Message from the King and Queen! Varian: What’s wrong? Villager: The cult made an unprovoked attack on a neighboring kingdom! Multiple casualties, homes destroyed and crops burnt… {Isaiah gasps and Varian covers his mouth in horror} Varian: a-anything else? Villager: The King and Queen are going with a small group to help aid the survivors. The Queen requests the Royal engineer’s attendance. Varian: Understood. Tell Rapunzel I’m on my way. Villager: As you wish sir. The group will leave at noon. {The villager leaves and Varian hurries over to his desk and begins packing a satchel; Zapada walks over to him} Zapada: Varian? Varian: I don’t understand...they’ve never made an unprovoked attack before… {She takes his hand} Zapada: are you alright? Varian:...I’m...I’m fine…*he brushes her cheek*...I’m just confused and I feel like I could have prevented this... Zapada: Perhaps we have answers when we get there? Varian: We? Zapada: Isaiah and I are going with you! Varian: Zapada no! You’re too heavy with child! I won’t risk losing all of you. Zapada: Varian! Te iubesc, dar oprește această protejare obsesivă stupidă sau te voi sugruma până la ultima r��suflare!

{Isaiah looks on shocked and Varian shrinks back} Varian: I...Have no idea what you just said but I feel like I should fear for my life... Isaiah: Dad please let the severely hormonal albino lady go with you...I don’t wanna die. Varian: *sigh*....fine Zapada: good...I go pack my saddlebag… {She walks away; Varian slumps against his work bench} Varian:....Get married dad said...it’ll be fun dad said...ugh. {Cut to the forest with Noremoth sitting in a tree with Catalina} Catalina: haha! Stop it! Noremoth: and why would I do that? You make the funniest face! Boop the nose! Catalina: haha...I can’t believe your mission is almost over… Noremoth: yeah… Catalina: You’re gonna come back sometime right? You’re super fun to hang out with… Noremoth:...*sad smile*...Yeah...I’ll be coming back. Keira: Hey love birds! Catalina: Keira! Stop calling us that! We’re not “love birds”! Keira: Whatever, Eugene and Rapunzel need us… Catalina: what for? Keira: that cult attacked another kingdom last night. {Noremoth jumps down} Noremoth: WHAT!? Catalina: You know about them? Noremoth:....yeah… I heard of them...I have to go… {Noremoth runs over and mounts his horse} Noremoth: Catalina it was lovely to meet you...Keira...bye…. {He gallops off; cut to Isaiah on a horse looking conflicted and Eugene notices and rides up next to him} Eugene: Hey kiddo. You alright? Isaiah: yeah...just...I kinda feel like this is my fault. Eugene: W-what? How? Isaiah: I made the cult mad cause I attacked miss Cass...and then she attacked me and now I have some of her power. And...now they’re attacking innocent people and it’s all because they want the moonstone sliver! {Pink magic crackles around him} Eugene: Hey easy buddy...deep breaths okay? Isaiah: sorry… Eugene: it’s not your fault..these people are...unstable...they’re crazy with anger and I bet half of them aren’t even angry they just are cruel and bloodthirsty. Isaiah: Then how do we stop them? {Rapunzel rides up} Rapunzel: With Corona spirit! Eugene: Sunshine! Rapunzel: We’ll all get through this...it may seem bleak and hopeless at times but as long as we have each other and keep the faith we’ll make it through. {Isaiah smiles at her} Eugene: Oh my god… {Isaiah looks and gasps in horror as they ride up to the kingdom; in the distance, Noremoth rides over a hill and sees the carnage and looks shellshocked; the place is practically burnt to the ground with people trying to dig through the remains and set things back in place} Varian:...They’ve never gone this far. Rapunzel:...Varian go with Eugene and help make plans to rebuild, Angry and Catalina look for survivors, Zapada and Isaiah you can help the wounded, I’m going to go find the leader here and get what happened. All: Yes you’re majesty… {Everyone goes to do their respective jobs and of in the background Noremoth skulks in the shadows looking at the destruction in utter horror} Noremoth:...I don’t understand...why did they…? {He steps on something and it crunches; he lifts his foot and picks up a singed toy wooden horse; his eyes widen and he drops it and covers his mouth as he runs over to a wall and gags; after a few moments he just rubs his head against the stone wall} {begin song “fighting”} {NOREMOTH} So many things happen in a year

But mostly bloodshed paints all my time I watch eyes fill with fear So many things in my life I regret but still I’m fighting So many days I wondered “was my birth a crime?” But as I grew I realized my only crime

Was being an orphan! “A drain on society” “a filthy pest” Well maybe now they’ll feel Remorseful. As I run my sword through their chest So many times I wonder is it worth it? To keep on going or to give up and die. My existence until now had no meaning. So why? Why do I keep Fighting!? I see the destruction that I cause and kills me It kills me deep inside. I hear children cry the same cry I did I wish to help but my hands are tied I ask in my mind that they forgive me. So why? Why do I keep fighting? Oh, why? I’m fighting… But why...do I still fight?

{End song with Noremoth wiping his tears and overhearing talking and he lurks closer in the shadows to evesdrop} Kingdom leader: It was just terrible you’re majesty...we stood no chance… Rapunzel: Just take a breath and try to explain it. Kingdom leader: Well they came in the middle of the night... none of us were expecting them. they were like animals. setting fire to everything, pillaging, they killed a great many of us, but I know what they mainly wanted, they broke into the treasury of our kingdom... they took so much I fear for my people… there was one woman who I assume is the leader once she had what she needed from our Treasury she told her band to retreat... but by then... the damage has already been done. {Noremoth growls with anger and slinks away} Rapunzel: I assure you Corona will do whatever they can to help this Kingdom get back on their feet… Kingdom leader: Thank you, your majesty… {Cut to evening and Isaiah walks over to a basin and washes blood from his hands with a sigh} Varian: Hey buddy… Isaiah: Dad… {Isaiah hugs Varian and snuggles into his torso} Varian: Rough day? Isaiah: a lot of these people are really hurt...Dad, why are people so mean? Varian:...That...That’s a good question, buddy. And unfortunately, I don't think anyone will ever have the answer to that one. {Zapada walks over} Zapada: Isaiah was quite the little helper today... he helps me tend a lot of burns and cuts today. He’s a little hero. Varian: tell me something I don't already know. {Isaiah smiles and suddenly Zapada jumps and grabs her stomach} Zapada: Oh! Varian: Zapada!? Are you alright!? Zapada: I’m fine!...little one is kicking me!..wanna feel? {Isaiah nods and gently puts his hand on her stomach} Isaiah: ….wow...hi there!... Varian: we still need to decide on a name… Zapada: we said Clover for girl...we need boy name. Isaiah: I got one! Varian: Oh ho...really? Let’s hear it. Isaiah: Sterling! Zapada: Sterling? Varian: Like sterling silver? Pfft.. {Zapada smacks his vest} Varian: OW! Zapada: act nice! Isaiah: *laughs* {Cut to the Cult HQ where Larkspur sits drinking from a goblet; Noremoth then storms in and walks up to her} Noremoth: YOU HEARTLESS WENCH! Larkspur: Well you're back... how was your mission did you learn any valuable information? Noremoth: Yeah I learned your backstabbing cutthroat! Larkspur: oh am I now? Noremoth: you knew I would never agree with a plan to pillage and commit genocide Larkspur: I wouldn't call what we did “genocide”. {Noremoth slaps the drink from her hand} Noremoth: what would you call it then!? did you even see what you left behind!? both men, women, and children slaughtered like pigs! when I joined this movement I joined because I too wanted to see a new world order and I also wanted Corona to pay for what they did to me. I did not join to slaughter countless innocent civilians. do we even need the money you stole!? or was this just a little fun Rendezvous for you!? Larkspur: you know how the men can get...they tend to get a little tense when they haven't battled something in a while. and our vessel did need the exercise. I needed to make sure her powers were still at full potential. well potential enough without the moonstone that is. Noremoth: this is not what we originally stood for. Larkspur: is that so? and pray tell how do you plan to fix it in your little mind? {Noremoth unsheathes his swords} Noremoth: it's time we got back on track. Larkspur:... are you truly sure you want this, Norie? {Noremoth swings his sword at her and she blocks it with her dagger} Larkspur: you filthy bugger… {Larkspur shoves him away and they circle one another} Larkspur: who would have thought this is how it ends? you know I did like you, Noremoth. Noremoth: no you didn't…. {she shoots some throwing knives at him; he deflects them with his sword and charges her; Cassandra hears the fighting from her cell} Cassandra: What the hell? Larkspur: Urgh! Noremoth: you know I always wondered why you never listen to me but now that I'm fighting you I think I finally understand. Larkspur: oh really? Noremoth: your pathetic little girl who's had nothing go right for her in life. what's wrong mommy and daddy didn't love you enough? {Larkspur charges with a scream and swings down at him; they lock swords} Noremoth: admit it I'm right! aren't I!? you're pathetic and scared, and were pushed around all your life! you put on this front acting like you care but in reality, you don't care at all you just want everyone to suffer under your thumb for the crappy hand you were dealt! you're no better than a whiney child! {Larkspur punches him and Noremoth falls back on the ground; Larkspur goes to jump on him with a knife and cuts his arm but he kicks up and flips her over; Larkspur lands harshly on the ground} Larkspur: AUGH! {Noremoth gets up and points his sword at her and wipes the blood from his lip} Noremoth: as I said before... pathetic. you don't even know how to fight. Larkspur: ….. that maybe but I do have one thing that you will never have… Noremoth: and that is? {suddenly swords are at his throat with cult members surrounding him} Larkspur: I have faithful followers… Cult member 1: what should we do with him, Mistress? Larkspur: Throw him in the dankest little cell that we have here... and let him rot for the time being... I'll figure out what to do with him eventually… Cult member 1: yes mistress… {The grab Noremoth and drag him away} Larkspur: Buh-bye Norie… {He’s taken to a cell and harshly thrown in; Cassandra looks up and sees him in the cell across from her; Noremoth groans and clutches his injured arm; Cassandra tears part of her clothes} Noremoth: Urgh!... Cassandra: Hey!... {Noremoth looks up and sees her toss some bread with a cloth wrapped around it to his cell} Cassandra: tie the cloth around your arm tightly... it'll stop the bleeding. and I was saving that bread but you can have it… Noremoth: ...Thank you… {END CREDITS}

#tangled #TTS #RTA #tangled the series #rapunzel’s tangled adventure #fanfic #matters of the heart #MotH #Isaiah #Varian #Zapada #Rapunzel #Noremoth #Eugene Fitzherbert

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fireintheforest · 5 years ago

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Behind the Blue: chapter 4, part 2

There were scorchmarks from magic in the hallways and in one door, and when Saufinril came back he was limping, visibly moody and with a bump and ugly bruise on his shin. He walked past the people that were gossiping in panicked whispers, past the echo of Mama Fro’s commands for calm and the subsequent protocol of the case, past the scorches on the walls left behind from his magic misses, until he got to his room and closed the door behind himself. The shin protested from the strain of going upstairs by sending pulses of pain down Saufinril’s leg, earning a groan from him. The wall where he’d fired first had an ugly smear (hope it wasn’t permanent. If it was, he’d have to hang something or fix it before Rialas saw it). A wave of dread and panic went over him. The intruder had tried to take his grandmother’s earring and Casil’s hunting knife, what did they manage to take? He immediately started to go through his things, counting and looking at each one for damage.

Meanwhile, down in the kitchen, Rialas was half sitting, half laying at table laid out with a typical Bosmeri breakfast of eggs, broth, slices of meats and bowls of insects. He was not the only one around looking displeased for being awoken so early, but unlike most people who would have never have dared to take out their bad mood on him, he had no similar restrains towards other people. Stabbing an egg with his knife and ignoring how bad manners such action showed he pulled the steaming bowl of broth closer and pointed to the closest poor soul with his egg-stained knife.

"You. Go. Get that dumb kynd of mine here. Now."

The lucky winner to deliver the message, a young orc with wild black hair and plenty of piercings on his face, went upstairs to the fourth floor until he got to Saufinril’s room and poked his head on the doorway. The young Altmer was sitting on the ground, breathing deep, a deep scowl on his face and his jaw clentched, his left knee up, his left elbow on the knee to support his head, which rested on his left hand that was clutching his hair tightly. His gaze was lost and had a light mist on his eyes. The right leg was straightened, letting the torn pant leg show the bump and the now eggplant-colored bruise.

Muraz poked his head on the doorway and simply said, "Soo...Rialas wants you. Not sure where Lillandril is so watch your back."

Saufinril softened the scowl, put his hands in his head and exhaled, closing his eyes. His hand wandered to his earring, which luckily he still had.

"Thanks" his tone was flat, but he tied his hair back while getting up (careful with the hurt leg!), took a glance around the room and then walked down to the first floor to the table where Rialas was eating. Rialas stared at Saufinril as he saw him first starting to approach, holding the delicate broth cup in one hand, taking a delicate sip.

"Morning, Rialas." Saufinril put his hands behind his back, waiting for his elder to talk first. Muraz was right, he hadn't seen Lillandril anywhere. He was probably holding himself above in the ceiling, waiting to ambush him or something. He didn´t dare look up in case it was true. Rialas didn't take his eyes off Saufinril, nor did he say anything. He only stared, mismatched eyes, narrowed like arrowheads, showing above the grey rim of the bowl. Saufinril, though he didn't say anything, didn't look at Rialas directly either. He just waited. Rialas set the bowl on the table with great care, then hit the knife deep in the table, so it stood there.

"Explain."

"Someone broke into the Den, to steal one's belongings, and one woke up when it happened. One chased the thief and followed them outside but lost them around the bar near the stream."

"Not. That." Rialas snarked. "I am not fool. I could hear your shouting."

"One was chasing him"

"Yes. Astonishing. You told me that." Rialas rolled his eyes and Saufinril stopped himself from doing the same. "And I said it is not what I wish you to explain."

"Well, that's what happened, one yelled at them to stop multiple times while one was chasing them. One will pay back to fix the damage in the Den, one promises"

Rialas closed his eyes slowly in an eerie gesture that his husband was often observed to do. "Not. That."

Well then I don’t know what the FUCK to tell you, now, do I?, Saufinril thought, his face revealing none of the irritability that was scratching the back of his neck and head.With expression and tone of voice that spoke of effort of restraint as great as balancing eggs on knife edge, Rialas spoke.

"I wish you to explain how you could make such a ruckus, and not bring back the head of this thief."

Oh. Right. This is Rialas we're talking about. Technically, Sau explained why, but the volume was so low, it might as well have been a mutter. Please don’t ask me to repeat it, please dont ask me to repeat it, please d-

A cough came from the doorway. Lillandril stood, arms folded, leaning against the frame. “And when you have explained that, you can explain quite how a penniless and destitute urchin such as yourself plans to find suitable recompense to fix the aftermath of your antics.”

Saufinril closed his eyes. Ah, there it is. The ambush. Saufinril took a step back and to the side to not give Lillandril his back.

"One will find a way, one has found jobs here before and..." he paused, seemingly remembering something, "There's a job that was proposed to one yesterday by a frequent client. It's in Evermor and one will be gone for a bit but it's very well rewarded and one can pay you both back"

Rialas snorted, "I do not need paying back. In money."

Lillandril’s eyebrow twitched. “Frequent client?”

"Well then how does one need to pay you back?" Great. Both parents are displeased. "From the Guild, he's come to the Den for a while."

“That hardly inspires confidence. Especially when considered alongside your track record where men and Mer are concerned.”

Rialas, too, clicked his tongue. "Clearly you need to work more shifts if you don't realize just how many people there are here from the Guild"

"One knows, one knows. It's this Dunmer, his name is Toivon. He's come around some times and last night he told one of this job and the cut is 4000 septims so...."

The eyebrow twitched again. “Dunmer?” Rialas raised both of his eyebrows, looking bit more awake and less grumpy. "The one with the little monkey?"

“Monkey? Oh do tell one that this one’s bad taste has not extended into the realms of pets as well? The last thing one wants or needs is an Imga as a son in law.”

Oh. Right. He has history with Dunmer.

"It's not like that- wait, monkey? No, one is not- an Imga, really? That's offensive" Saufinril said

Rialas looked affronted "I would never call Imga a monkey" he huffed

“One quite agrees. The Imga may well be pitiable and at times disagreeable, but they at least try to better themselves. To equate them to Dunmer besmirches their efforts most assuredly.”

"Point is, one- it's not that kind of agreement." Immediately after saying that, Saufinril seemed unsure, "It's, it's a distraction. In the sense of help for a heist."

"Oh? Tell me more." Rialas said, eyebrow arched, leaning forward to his elbow and pulling his knife off the table with practiced ease. “One agrees.” Lillandril narrowed his eyes slightly. “Tell one more.”

Rialas shuffled over on the fur covered bench to allow his husband space to sit down next to him. Lillandril moved to the bench, keeping his eyes trained on Saufinril as he sat down next to his husband, one hand reaching up in an almost absentminded way to wind fingers through Rialas’ hair. Saufinril seemed to just look more uneasy, but then he exhaled, "It's in Evermor, it's stealing a jewel during a party and they needed someone to provide a distraction while a key to the vault or box (one doesn't remember which) is taken. It's just one night, then one gets paid and one is back here. It's a high society party and with the payment one will pay for the damages."

“High society?” A faint smile played at Lillandril’s lips. “You?”

"One knows. He suggested one pass as an Artist but...that's, well near, it's not...after this break in one doesn't have much choice"

Rialas leaned over to practically flop on Lillandrils lap as he said, "Don't be so judgemental. Any Altmer can fool their way through in man society. I am more worried about the proving distraction"

"Aren't we all." Saufinril muttered

“One would be more concerned he takes you as an example in that regard.”

Rialas grinned, showing rows of sharp teeth. "Have you considered that this is awfully convenient?" Saufinril stayed silent for a second, then gave a shy nod. Lillandril made an agreeing noise. “What precisely do you even know about this Dunmer?” he asked

"Not much." Saufinril sat opposite them and passed a hand through his hair. He’d just dismissed his gut instinct as paranoia, but now… "By the Nine, you think he..."

“One thinks one asked you a question. You recall from your studies, one presumes, that one expects full answers.”

Rialas snickered and reached up to caress Lillandril’s jawline, looking at Sau like a child watching his favourite shadow theatre play.

"One knows- he's from the Guild, he comes here often with either a Nord or a Redguard or another younger Dunmer, his name is Toivon, that's it. He's very private and we've only talked a handful of times. The first time one ever saw him here was the night of the fight one had in the Den some years ago, with an Imperial."

“Quite the endorsement.”

Rialas chuckled and spoke at Lillandril in Bosmeris in a singsong voice "Somebody’s going to get kidnapped…"

Lillandril turned his head slightly to his husband, switching to Bosmeris himself. “If he thinks one is traipsing north to rescue him because he can’t say no to a sunken grey face, he is sadly mistaken.”

A bite of irritation nibbled at the back of Saufinril’s head. He’d lived with them in Valenwood for years and they still spoke Bosmeris in front of him, as if he couldn’t understand it. Even though he managed to not roll his eyes at them again, he slipped out a snappy "One is not getting kidnapped. And one didn't sleep with him. Nor one plans to."

“You very rarely plan it. If people planned it, it would be rather dull.”

"Kynd. Use the brain poor atta has tried to hammer in you yes?" Rialas laughed, still petting Lillandril’s jawline, "This person you know nothing about offers you easy convenient work. Away. Oh only you can do it. And then this little thing happens. So you feel like you have no choice" Rialas laughed. "It’s so convenient it's hilarious."

"Fine but to be fair, you are a better candidate for it, anyone is and one told him" Saufinril replied.

Rialas preened and chuckled. "So why exactly did he need you hmm?"

"He said the Breton eat up anything Altmer. One suggested you, serah, but..." he eyed Lillandril cautiously, "he said the Bretons look for something younger."

The eyebrow twitched again. “Ten generations of supreme lineage, to be insulted by a Dunmer. One should curse his name immediately.”

Rialas laughed. "And why was I rejected? Because I am not Altmer? Like men could tell the difference."

Oh by the Nine, why.

"Something about...you know-yeah, it was that. That it was perfect, you were perfect, but not Altmer"

“Oh? Whereas one is Altmer but not perfect? Too ... old?”

"He acknowledged you have experience and are an Altmer but...yeah"

“Hm. So it’s his charm and grace that is tempting you north?”

"Assuming this is a ploy to get one kidnapped, one has gotten out of situations like this. One escaped the Isles and crossed Tamriel with just 20 years of age. One has broken out of jails in Cyrodiil. One's got this. And if it's a true, actual job, one has the money to fix this at once versus all the jobs and time one would need to get it paid. It's not his charm, it's money"

"You're not going anywhere before we meet this Toivon.” Rialas said as Lillandril added a “You escaped the Isles and crossed Tamriel to be attacked by Dunmer, break into one’s home, and require one’s assistance and tutelage.”

"...but one escaped."

“So he lacks any redeeming features? Has no true personality to speak of? The extent of his virtues goes no further than his coin purse?”

"So far?"

"I cannot believe you are leaving us for coins.” Rialas interjected

"One is going to come back! One is not leaving anybody." The temptation to roll his eyes was too big.

Then it was Lillandril who spoke, “Which would make you ... well, it’s not for one to disparage those who chose the path of the courtesan. You, however, lack those requisite skills to claim that title.”

"Y'ffre knows it is not my fault he has not learned." Rialas mentioned

"One is not going as- you know, courtesan would be a good role for the job"

By now, the older Altmer was now talking to his husband in Bosmeris, “Auri-el knows, you have tried, one has tried. The boy’s skull is stubbornly thick. He is considering running off with a Dunmer of all things.” Before switching back to Common to tell his apprentice, “If you are going at all remains an open topic of discussion.”

"It hardly counts as running off." Rialas replied, then switched to Common as well, "Courtesan? You want to be courtesan now"

"No! Well, listen if the job is real, yes. One night." Saufinril reassured. Or at least, tried to. The Den owners’ displeasure rose almost at once by Rialas and Lillandril, respectively.

"You cannot be courtesan for one night!"

“One night. Pah. No true courtesan would ever say such a thing. And you are the Altmer this boy chooses? Clearly, his judgement matches his race.”

"One wouldn't be a true courtesan, one knows! It's just pretend." Saufinril’s head was developing a shy headache and the leg was screaming with pain now.

“So you want to pretend to be a conversation - that is, a common whore - and travel the length of Tamriel with a Dunmer boy you scarcely know, to undertake a high risk theft, with little to no pre planning or understanding of the situation, context, or surroundings, all in an attempt to gather money to repay the damages done to this establishment. And you expect us to bless this - one cannot bring oneself to call it a plan – half-baked thimble full of vague notions?”

"...well, when put that way..." Saufinril sighed, "To be fair one was...well, going anyway. It's more like...one was letting you know...where...one was going?"

“Oh, was that what this was? By Phynaster, how did one not understand that?” There it was, the Lillandril sass.

"It sounds sketchy, one knows. But at least one will try, and at the first sign of a trap, one leaves. One considered this possibility, but if it's not a trap, this covers the damages and an extra. At the very least, one can try." Just like Saufinril was trying to convince Lillandril and Rialas that this endeavour was going to be ok.

Lillandril was the next one to talk, “If you have made your mind up, what precisely can we say? Plead you to reconsider? Admonish you till shame turns your mind? One thinks not. If you seek our blessing, one finds it difficult to give. Coming on the heels of a morning where one was awoken by a commotion of your making, and forced to intervene with only a bedsheet to preserve one’s modesty, one rather thinks one might be forgiven for finding this is all somewhat I’ll conceived, rushed, and dubious. If well intentioned.”

"I will never bless that idea either." Rialas spoke, "Should you wish to pass as courtesan, you need help."

“To say nothing of your overall skill set for taking to the road. You have become quite the urban creature of comforts.” He loved Lillandril but this kind of thing was annoying, his job was LITERALLY to travel around finding people and killing them. He literally just came back from the road from Kvatch anddon'tthinkofEramondon'tthinkaboutEramon-

"You need to be bigger than life. Currently you act like you’re hardly bigger than mudcrab." He loved Rialas but that was not true. At least not like it used to be, and it used to be worse. He used to be straight-up scared of Rialas.

“Whilst it is buried in the mud.” Lillandril added

"Alright, so act like Rialas." He said more to cut the list of things he wasn’t than to summarize, but Lillandril interrupted.

“No. You cannot act like Rialas. Anyone other than Rialas trying to act like Rialas is liable to be killed or imprisoned.”

Rialas smiled, smugly, “It’s true.”

"....yes, fair", Saufinril conceded

“And one’s husband is quite right. If you think you are leaving before we at least meet the fiend who is enticing you away, you are very much mistaken. If naught else, one needs to assess his skills so as to decide as to what kind of bound creature to send to watch over you.”

Fuck, he’d hoped that ignoring that part would’ve slipped out of their minds, especially Lillandril’s, "This is not a bridal kidnapping, but fair. Agreed."

“And before you think of sneaking out the city, it will be considerably mite pleasant all round if you volunteer to bring this Dunmer to us, than if one has to either send a Xivali to bring you back, or engage the Guild to speed your return.” Lillandril added.

"He's not one's boyfriend, one will not run off with him like that, one just broke up with Eramon, one is not that much of a hot mess! But alright." Saufinril added the last part before he went off in a frustrated rant.

A raised eyebrow, “You broke up with who now? Was that the Redguard with the tattoo of an anchor on his cheek?”

"You really know nothing" Rialas rolled his eyes at his husband.

"No, that was-that doesn't matter, it was one's-the Altmer one met in Lympar March a while ago. We'd broken up before and then he came and we got back together? The one you didn't like? Black hair?" Saufinril offered, trying to make that spark of recognition go off on Lillandril. Then again the mer was around his 8000s, this might take a while. Come on, how many times do you see an Altmer with black hair? He had to remember that one.

“Saying ‘twas the one one did not like hardly narrows it down. You do show a worrying fondness for trawling through the sluice of life when it comes to your romantic entanglements.” Lillandril observed. Which was uncalled for. True, of course, but uncalled for.

Saufinril passed a hand through his face, "The cocky one. Said he could do Marcie's job better than her. He uh, kind of agreed to a threesome with one without, um, one's consent." A pause, "The one that you said talks too much."

"We need to figure who you are." Rialas said, clearly following his own trail of thought. "You know everyone is different when they are working. We just need to figure out who is inside this shy little Altmer peasant."

“Oh! The screamer? Yes, him one recalls. All of the workers recall him. All of the city recalls him.” Lillandril recalled, his usual sass on his words.

"Good riddance." Rialas said. Then, "Nothing wrong with being screamer. You just need to learn to do better magic to prevent other suffering from it."

“Oh, but was so much more amusing to offer him a gag. One has scarce seen such a shade of red.” Lillandril mused

"Please. He was Altmer. You don’t go red, just... Vaguely orange-y gold."

“The point stands.”

Saufinril rubbed the back of his neck while Lillandril and Rialas talked, proving the point that Altmer turn an orange-y pink tone when blushing. So much for not thinking about him, but to be fair he’d brought him up first. Rialas chuckled and rolled comfortably on Lillandril’s lap like a supple, seductive snake

Lillandril continued, “Regardless. Anything must be an improvement over his wailing. Even a Dunmer. Perish the thought.”

And then Rialas tried it: "Well if I recall didn't you say you once-"

“No one did not.”

"That's not what I remember hearing..."

“You are a notorious fantasist.”

Rialas purred, "I know. And you enjoy it."

Lillandril then turned to Saufinril: “So when shall we expect to meet your co-conspirator? Dinner tomorrow evening, perhaps? One believes that the ribbon dancers are booked for tomorrow evening. The patrons will hardly notice our absence. And one does believe that one spied chef bringing in a rather fetching looking box of sea urchins earlier. We can serve them.”

"Does that mean we will be eating Altmer food?" Rialas asked

“If this one is to play the part of a courtesan, he needs start his remedial studies as soon as possible. Including his table manners and dining choices.”

Rialas huffed. "As long as it is Pact compliant."

"One can ask him, sure" Saufinril just had to wait for the blush to lower before going out to the north exit to tell Toivon today about this.

#btb #behind the blue #holy shit it only took me 2 weeks to upload the second part wow #if y'all pray and believe enough I'll upload part 3 at the end of the month #lol #or not idk #my schedule and willingness to upload this is a fickle lil bich #altmer #bosmer #orsimer #in which Sau is dumb enough to believe that this sketchy scheme and robbery won't mean he's going to get trafficked #lmaoo #the parents #hey look it's Lillandril and Rialas!#in a literary (joke) story!#wow!#thanks Ben and Kris for RPing with me!#and thanks Kris for betaing this with your very own two eyes in a day I wanted to jump off the bridge by my job #lmao

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gostaks · 8 years ago

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A wishlist for the Godling of Sau

((Long post ahead, hit J if you don’t want to see my rambling))

Yesterday I wrote a post about disability in Godsfall and how it was handled poorly in the most recent episode, and last night I received a reply from @xion-from-godsfall. The reply and my response to it are here. Now, I went through a lot of stuff in that response, but I wanted to more directly address one bit, the Godling of the Astral Plane.

Aram (@godsfalldc) has talked a lot about how he’s drawn inspiration from comic books and superheroes. Superheroes and comic books are great and have historically been a wonderful way for minorities to express themselves, but there are a number of ableist superhero tropes that basically go unquestioned.

Specifically, here’s the elevator version of why I’m nervous about what you’re doing with the Godling of Sau and a few tips on how to fix it.

From episode two of Godsfall, the Astral Plane has been associated with seeing the unseen. Sau’s presence in the show has been primarily through the Eye of Sau. So when I heard that the Godling of the Astral Plane was going to be blind, I feel fairly justified in jumping to the conclusion that you’re going to play her as a blind seer.

So what’s wrong with the blind seer trope? Here’s an article about tragic and magical disabilities and here’s another about the specific treatment of blindness in fantasy and science fiction. You don’t have to read them, but I’d recommend that you do because, like everything, you can’t learn shit from staring at a link and hoping you’ll open it next week. Just in case you don’t, the short version is that giving your character a disability and giving them a magical power that immediately cancels it out is, at best, fucking trash writing.

We already have Geordi LaForge and Daredevil. Even if those two were the only two blind characters who essentially have their blindness canceled out by ~future science~ and ~special powers~, we’d have already filled all of the necessary slots for that specific trope. Ever. Seriously we don’t need more. Please.

So what can you do to steer clear of these tropes while still keeping the character I know you’ve worked hard on? Keeping in mind that I’m sighted and thus not an authority on blindness or portraying blind characters (although I did do my research), here’s my wishlist for the Godling of the Astral Plane

Don’t use her godling abilities to cancel out her disability: Just because the Astral Plane has been associated with sight so far doesn’t mean that it has to be. Maybe your godling can hear magic. Maybe she has synesthesia and the things that would ordinarily be visual are translated into another sense. Be creative and don’t use the “she’s blind but she can see on another plane of reality” cop out unless you really can’t avoid it. (I put this first, but it’s really the most optional. If you want her to actually see in the Astral Plane, go ahead. Just please consider other, more creative, options and don’t let her Astral sight translate into erasure of her Material Plane disability)

Make it really, really clear that her blindness and Astral Plane powers aren’t causally connected: Toph from ATLA is one of the best representations of a blind character who “sees” through other means. Her powers are cool, but they’re also clearly an adaptive ability that she’s learned over time and that can be taught to other earthbenders. You’re obviously not going to be able to pull that off, but you can at least establish early on that her powers neither caused nor are a result of her blindness.

Actually research blindness: As a general piece of advice to anyone who ever tries to write a disabled character, your #1 goal is to know your shit going in. Keep in mind that only about 2% of blind people have no vision whatsoever. Find a diagnosis that fits what you want the character to be able to do and find at least a couple of articles/blog posts/etc about what it’s like to live with that condition.

Don’t let the players (or the audience) forget that she’s blind: This is actually one of the really great successes of Toph as a character, her disability colors the way she interacts with the world. Blind people have a lot of mannerisms that sighted people wouldn’t notice. For instance, my grandmother has identical salt and pepper shakers, she shakes them and figures out which is which from the sound. Showing how she interacts with her environment using touch and sound will both give depth to her character and increase immersion in the world

Give her needs, but don’t go overboard: Blind people can do a lot of stuff on their own, but if nothing else she’s not going to be able to read text and will struggle to get around in unfamiliar spaces. Canes, fantasy braille, and people who are able to read street signs are going to be staples of her life and showing these needs will go a long way towards positive representation. Her specific needs may vary depending on the exact type of vision loss she has, but rehabilitation websites are probably your best bet for a comprehensive breakdown of what real-life blind people use

Lampshade the fuck out of this: I can’t tell you how to run your world, but our own world has thousands of stories about blind seers ranging back at least as far as ancient greece. It would make total sense for her to make at least one joke about how absolutely bullshit the blind seer trope is.

And finally (and I hope this one is redundant) don’t cure her blindness: I don’t care how much Pera wants to burn her face off, using magic to cure disabilities is bad representation and bad storytelling. Don’t do it.

That was a lot longer than I wanted it to be, so I hope it makes sense. I hope this post reaches the Godsfall crew before you record your next session, but if it doesn’t I hope you’ll keep the magical disability issues in mind for the next time.

Also, if anyone has stuff to add on to this post please do.

#shut up alan #text #godsfall #dungeons and disabilities #I know this isn't the ideal way to reach the cast but tumblr is where I'm best at communicating #i guess i could do email?#okay I'm sure I could add a bunch more shit but I'm going to post because otherwise I'll psych myself out and I need to sleep

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