#so I'm dedicating this to you guys even if you don't end up reading this

[witchywcmans]

FORBIDDEN FRUIT. | LAIOS TOUDEN

synopsis ━━ laios can't seem to get enough after he first tastes you. but the lines in your friendship are beginning to blur. it's only when your party happens upon your ex-lover in the dungeon that laios realizes what he should've communicated all along. (laios x f!reader.)

content warnings ━━ cunnilingus, praise, size kink, jealousy, classic missionary, unprotected sex, creampie, mutual pining/confession, laios and reader are not good with communication (but they work it out v well), laios is self concious but reader is so kind to him !!, monster facts as dirty talk. nsfw (minors + ageless blogs dni).

word count ━━ 4.8k

song inspiration ━━ awkward, sza / cherry, lana del rey / hunger, florence + the machine

author's note ━━ TECHNICALLY, this could be a part 2 to please, eat, so I'm just going to link as a part 2. you don't have to read please, eat before this, but if you like laios then obvi you should read it anyway!! I'm SO SORRY it took me so long to post another laios x reader 😭 I was trying to finish the manga before I wrote something else dungeon meshi-related, but life gets the way. oh well. also, this might be controversial, but in this fic I’m refuting the “laios is a virgin” allegations. SUE ME. I simply don’t believe he’s been adventuring so long and hasn’t been with anyone, that is crazzzy to me !! but that's just me 🤗 we all have our fave headcanons! my goal when I finish the manga is to write something for laios at the end of the story hehe. I hope you guys enjoy part 2! this one-shot is dedicated to @satoogojos 🫶

🪽 part i: PLEASE, EAT. / part ii: FORBIDDEN FRUIT. / part iii: TOO SWEET.

Catching feelings for your friend was truly a fickle thing. But you guessed it was bound to happen with what you and Laios were doing behind everyone’s back. Each night, after your party tucked themselves in their bedrolls, Laios would so delicately lace your arm through his and you two would find a private area … before he completely buried his face between your thighs.

He was fixated on the way you tasted, the way he could get you to cum so easily on his tongue. You were the only dessert he wanted after every dinner. Some nights, he would have you writhing from overstimulation, but he just wanted more of you – so much more.

It was a little confusing, though, how he didn’t ask for anything in return. Laios seemed to grind against the cold, dungeon floor as his tongue lapped at your essence, sometimes cumming in his pants and moaning between your legs. Or he would politely excuse himself after he was done, taking care of himself as you cleaned yourself up. You didn’t quite understand it, and maybe neither did he. You both were just too awkward to broach the subject.

The incident with the sea serpent had changed your friendship forever. Not only did Laios save you from becoming one, but the intimacy you both now shared seemed to open you up more. You found yourself divulging more secrets to him, leaning on him when you needed someone, even being more impartial to Senshi’s monster meals. And you liked the way he smiled, how he looked at you. You liked how fearless he was. You liked how protective he was over the party, especially you. You … really liked him. Far more than a crush. In fact, you wished you could go back in time and just have a crush. But your feelings for him became deeper as you crept lower and lower into the dungeon together. Your goal was still to come out of this dungeon alive, but now … you hoped that you would make it out alive together.

What a foolish girl you had become.

You tried to remain focused on the path ahead of you, but you were clearly lost in thought today. The party had reached floor 6, which meant you were closer and closer to the deepest part of the dungeon and hopefully rescuing Laios’ sister, Falin. The last thing you expected to see on floor 6 were other adventurers, let alone your ex.

You were hesitant to call him an ex, since you two had never really been anything but a warm body in each other’s beds while living on the surface. But when your bodies collided and your eyes met his, you realized why you had taken a liking to him in the first place. He had been a butcher’s son, handy with an axe, and you had liked his big, strong hands. You almost fell right into him from the slippery dungeon floor, but those strong hands seemed to catch you like you were made of air. “It’s you,” he chuckled, setting you up straight and tucking a stray hair behind your ear. “Look at you … feels like it was just yesterday when we were on the surface, huh?”

Marcille looked like she didn’t want anything to do with your ex and his party, but Senshi was very kind to offer them food, if they needed it. Chilchuck seemed neutral, and Laios … you still couldn’t read Laios as easily as the rest of the party. He watched your ex like a hawk, standing behind you as if to protect you. Your ex’s hands were big, sure, but Laios was tall, his shoulders wide and intimidating even without the armor. Laios narrowed his eyes slightly whenever he saw your ex’s gaze roam over you, like he was undressing you with his eyes. And you weren’t sure if you caught it – it only lasted a second – but did Laios clench his hands into fists?

There wasn’t enough time in the world to dwell on it. Especially when you had ghosts seemingly pulling you into another area of the dungeon and waking up on a dirt path, a beautiful golden castle mounted ahead of you. Your party was initially confused, walking into the village and seeing monsters living harmoniously with humans. After becoming acquainted with the village, you and your friends were offered a warm, delicious meal with Yaad, the lord of the Golden Country. After Yaad explained the history of this village, you all were each given rooms to rest in for the night. The beds were small and cold, but far better than a bedroll.

You were used to Laios initiating with you every night, but by the time everyone went to sleep, he still didn’t call upon you. So you stood from your bed, adjusting the nightgown given to you, and walked across the hall to where Laios’ room was. You knocked on his door, and you heard the slip of a sword into a sheath behind the thin wood. He had been inspecting Kensuke for some reason, probably mulling over Yaad’s words. When he opened the door, he was dressed in loose pants and a linen shirt, droplets running down his neck. He must’ve just bathed. You couldn’t stop yourself from digging your nails into your palm.

“Can I come in?” You asked in a hushed voice, and he moved out of the way for you to step inside.

His room looked exactly like yours, but the sheets were ruffled from lack of sleep. Laios walked around you and sat on the edge of the bed, leaving you more confused than ever. You played with your hands as you stared at him, contemplating. “Is something wrong, Laios?” You inquired, stepping closer to him. “You’ve been acting weird even before we got here.”

His brow furrowed for a moment. “How do you figure?”

“Well, you …” Your tongue clicked. “You didn’t come to find me after everyone went to bed.”

He seemed to concede, shoulders dipping at your answer. Shifting on the mattress, he propped himself up against his pillows and moved Kensuke to lean against the wall. His silence was even more perplexing. This had to be the longest time Laios went without talking. He was a blabbermouth.

“I don’t understand,” you continued, walking over and sitting on the end of his bed. “Are you … are you angry with me?”

“No, no,” Laios was quick to reply, “I’m not angry with you. I’m just …”

You raised a brow, eager to hear his answer.

“That man you recognized. On floor 6,” he finally said, his fists clenching again at the memory. “I didn’t … I didn’t like the way he looked at you. And his tone. It was disrespectful to you. Unless I’m reading this all wrong.”

You were taken aback by his honesty. So he had been bothered by your ex. “Oh,” you replied, “well … me and him, we do have history, Laios. But it’s in the past.”

“I could tell.” He was picking at his nails now, any excuse not to meet your eyes. “Everyone has a life before the dungeon. It’s not about the past. I just … I didn’t like him. Or how he looked at you like … like he still wanted you. Or something.”

“Or something,” you repeated, nodding your head. A slow smile crept onto your lips at the realization. “Laios, are you jealous?”

His head jolted up, his eyes glued to his hands, searching for something unknown. Realization washed over his face, as if he hadn’t even considered this possibility. “Oh, gods,” he pinched the bridge of his nose. “This whole day I’ve been trying to reconcile with what I’m feeling and I knew I wasn’t mad at you – maybe just mad at the circumstances – and none of it made sense, but now …” He finally met your eyes, a chuckle slipping past his lips. “I was just jealous. How did I not realize?”

“Maybe because we didn’t talk about it,” you offered in a low voice, reaching out and lacing your fingers with his. A jolt of electricity ran through your fingertips and all the way up your arm. You wished you could hide your reaction, but it was clear as day, making Laios shift in his spot. “Laios, we should talk –”

“You’re not leaving the party, are you?” His grip on your fingers went tight, and he didn’t even realize it.

“No,” you laughed, scooting closer and running your free hand over his face. His cheeks flushed instantly when you touched him. “I think … we should talk about what’s happening between us.”

Laios’ gaze went narrow as he processed your words. “Oh,” he said blankly, and then his eyes went wide. “Oh.”

“I just … because we’ve been doing this every night … it’s hard not to feel …” You sighed, unable to get the words right. But he seemed to understand, quick-witted as ever, squeezing your hand in encouragement. And then he smiled at you, all dopey and kind, and your heart began to pound. “I can’t help but think that the lines are being blurred between us. My feelings for you are … much deeper than what they were initially. And if you don’t feel the same way, that’s okay. I needed you to know. I’m sorry if this hurts … whatever our relationship is.”

He was still smiling, his other hand gripping your waist, pulling you even closer. “Well, I think –”

“And now I can’t help but wonder if maybe – just maybe – you feel the same way,” you started rambling, terrified to know how he was going to reply. “Because why would you feel jealous if you didn’t … I shouldn’t make assumptions. But I still wondered. And I can’t stop talking. Again, I don’t want this to ruin anything and I’m sorry if it does. My ex doesn’t mean anything to me anymore and he won’t ever again –”

Out of nowhere, Laios used his upper body strength to flip you onto your back, pinning you to the bed. Now your cheeks were flushed, completely caught off guard by the action. He sat in between your legs, his fingers just brushing over your waist, as he said, “I do. Feel the same. I feel like I’m the one who could’ve ruined this because I didn’t realize it sooner.”

You gave him a sad smile, reaching up to cup his chin. “You couldn’t ruin anything.”

He leaned into your palm when your hand moved to his cheek, humming under his breath. He then leaned down, his body just barely pressing against yours, as if he craved your body heat. Like a moth to a flame.

“Can we not talk about your ex ever again?” He muttered, his hands running up and down your sides. “Because when I saw him today, all I could think about was …” He stopped himself abruptly.

“What?” Your curiosity peaked.

“I’m going to sound like a jealous brute,” he sighed dramatically, nose brushing against yours as his hands moved higher, thumbs grazing over the underside of your breasts. The material of your nightgown was so thin that your peaked nipples were already visible. “I just … couldn’t stop thinking about all the times I’ve tasted you that he hasn’t. I wondered if he knew exactly how you liked it, which places made those funny sounds come out of your mouth. And then, I couldn’t stop thinking about it, and all I wanted this whole day was to get you alone.”

You shuddered when his thumb brushed over one of your taut nipples, making your heel run down the back of his leg. His words alone made tingles run down your spine, but the second his hands were on you, you were properly soaked. The both of you lay there for a moment: him on top of you, nuzzling your nose, rolling his fingers over your nipples through your nightgown, eliciting breath hitches from your lips.

It was so slow, so patient, so good, but had you wanting more. And you couldn’t stop the words coming out when you blurted, “I want to have sex.”

He paused, opening his eyes for a moment, making sure he heard you properly.

“We don’t have to if you don’t want to,” you said quickly, feeling awkward. But why were you so shy all of a sudden? It’s not like he didn’t have his tongue deep inside your pussy every night. Maybe it was because there was a question still lying underneath the surface. “Why ... why don’t you want me to help you finish after you eat me out? Sometimes you just … walk away to take care of yourself.”

Laios’ face went bright red, and then he buried his face in your neck. “I’m so embarrassed.”

Your hand pushed back his cropped, blonde hair, trying to soothe his racing heart. “Why are you embarrassed?”

“Because it’s … it’s big,” he sighed and lifted his head. “There. I said it. It’s just big. And the last person who saw it made me feel super self-conscious about it.”

You couldn’t help but snort. “You’re embarrassed because you have a big dick?”

His pretty golden eyes were serious, but it looked like he wanted to laugh with you. “Please, don’t make it sound trivial.”

“It’s not trivial, it’s just …” You went to cup both his cheeks. The way he looked at you was unlike anything you ever experienced. You wondered why it took you so long to realize he felt the same. “I would never make you feel self-conscious about anything. I like everything about you, Laios.”

Your words had him melting, leaning back down into you and kissing you slowly. It was only when his tongue slipped into your mouth that his hand snaked down between your legs, just cupping your soaked entrance, the one thing he loved to eat more cheesecake. Realizing that you weren’t wearing any underwear had him reeling. “Gods …” He moaned into the kiss, his fingers simply running down your soaked folds.

As his lips broke away from yours, you asked in a tone as sweet as barometz, “Do you want to have sex, Laios?”

“Yes,” he replied, voice desperate. “Yes, please.”

Your hands went to the hem of his loose, linen shirt, breaking your kiss again to lift it over his head. For the first time, you were able to see what he looked like underneath all the armor. His shoulders were wide-set, his torso soft while also being oddly defined. Most tall-men your party encountered thought Laios was on the slender side, not believing how strong he was. But once your eyes beheld his biceps, you knew how wrong they all were. He was built and muscular and – gods, you could admire him for hours.

Laios stopped your hands from going any further, a pleading look in his eyes. He pushed your nightgown up and bunched it at the waist. “Can I taste you first?”

You nodded quickly, already intoxicated by the way he kissed you, the way he smiled at you, all eager and excited to bury his face in your pussy. It didn’t take him long; he was lightning fast, moving down your body and lifting your legs on his shoulders so he could eat you out easier. His tongue dove into your folds immediately, and he groaned at the first taste. You were acutely more aware every night that he could do this for hours, just lapping at you lazily, bringing you to orgasm over and over again. No monster compared to the way you tasted.

His nose bumped your clit as he tongued your leaking hole, practically whimpering at every drop of your wetness that reached his mouth. Large, calloused hands wrapped around your thighs, making sure they didn’t close and digging into your flesh. Your own hands fisted into the sheets, your ass lifted off the bed, but you could still grind your hips against his face. Soft whines left your lips, nothing compared to the groans Laios was making as he ate you like he didn’t have a three-course meal just an hour ago. You almost wondered if you should tell him to quiet down, afraid of the others hearing, but you were too lost in the pleasure to care.

It was clear to you the closer you got to reaching your peak that Laios wasn’t keen on stopping. And as much as you truly wanted to cum all over his tongue, you thought it was important that you both have this new experience together. It took you a few seconds to finally gather the courage to say something, his tongue feeling too good as he swirled it around your sensitive clit. “Laios,” you called, and then a little louder, “Laios.”

He lifted his head, your juices dripping down his chin. A primal urge made him want to dive back into you, but he controlled himself. His tongue licked at your essence around his mouth, and you shuddered at the sight.

“I want you inside me,” you whispered. “Is that okay?”

“Yes, yes,” he muttered hoarsely, placing your legs so delicately back on the bed, as if they were made of glass. “Of course.” He so desperately wanted to taste you again, but he was even more excited for this, to finally feel something other than his hand wrapped around his cock. You were the first person he ever tasted, but it had been quite a while since he was truly intimate with someone, to slide into someone and feel them clench around him.

As you tugged off your nightgown, Laios began to work at the ties of his pants. But his hands stopped as they came undone, glancing up at you with hesitation. You looked so pretty sitting in the middle of his bed, waiting for him, naked and vulnerable. He felt silly for feeling so self-conscious, especially when you were so beautiful like this.

“Laios,” you cooed, caressing his arm, “there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. And if you don’t want to, then we can stop.”

He almost choked on a laugh. “Trust me,” he replied, “I want to.”

After another beat of stalling, Laios finally stepped out of his bottoms and blushed pink from ear to ear. His cock was … well, it certainly was big. You sympathized with him; if anyone told you something about your body during sex, you would focus on that forever. But there was nothing for him to be embarrassed about. Truthfully, most males would kill to have what he did. His cock was thick and long, a few veins trailing down the shaft, curving up at his pretty red tip that was dripping with precum. You got even more wet just from staring at it, wondering what he would finally feel like inside of you. 

Your mouth opened to say something, anything to make him feel better, but he was already talking: “I need a distraction so I don’t think about you staring at it.” He crawled back onto the bed and between your thighs, immediately pressing his lips to yours. You could taste yourself still on his mouth, and your arms wound around his shoulders instantly. His teeth tugged at your bottom lip, and he asked, “Can I just … ramble about monster facts for a minute?”

You blinked, not expecting that. Laios released your lower lip and sighed, clearly still nervous. “It’ll help me get over this feeling. I swear. Or if you want to stop this, we can. I’ll … I’ll understand –”

“Laios,” you huffed, your mouth pulling back into a sweet smile, “I want you to do whatever makes you feel comfortable.”

“Oh, thank the gods,” he muttered, nuzzling his face back into your neck, placing sloppy kisses. “Did you know that … that harpies almost exclusively have the head of a female human and it is unknown if male harpies exist?”

His voice was muffled against your neck, but you could tell he was desperate and aching. You felt his hard length against your stomach, smearing precum on the exposed skin. “Really?” You breathed out, trying to engage with him but completely failing when he licked a stripe up your neck. A moan escaped your lips.

“There’s also … there’s, uh …” He was struggling to talk now, grasping his cock and giving it a few quick pumps before teasing the head against your dripping wet folds. Your legs instinctively opened wider for him, hoping to whatever gods were out there that you could take his cock. “There also exists a seabird variant of harpies called … called, Sirens. Their wings and  … their – their tail look like a seagull’s.”

You could hardly breathe as you asked, “What else, Laios?”

He began to push inside you slowly, letting you adjust with each inch. “Okay, okay … uh … bicorns … bicorns hate – oh, fuck.” Just the feeling of your tight warmth wrapped around his cock had him biting into your shoulder, like you were the forbidden fruit. He could hardly string together a word, could hardly think, as he sank deeper and deeper into you, his whole body shaking. “Bicorns hate … hate virtue. They prefer – shit – immorality. It is believed that … doing all seven deadly sins will … will allow an individual to approach a bicorn – fuck. Fuck. It feels –”

When he was finally buried to the hilt, all he could do was breathe into your neck. You whined, locking your legs around his waist. The stretch was unbelievable; your walls gripped him like a vice. But it was even better than you could’ve imagined. If you had thought originally that the night would go this way, you would’ve at least brushed your hair. Laios didn’t care though, inhaling the flowery scent as he nosed your pretty strands. You couldn’t even comprehend – whether it be from the stretch of his thick cock inside you or the overwhelming amount of butterflies in your stomach – how you were so lucky to have found him.

Not to mention, you felt even luckier that this wasn’t happening on a cold dungeon floor.

With one hand carding into his hair, you chuckled under your breath, “Had enough of reciting monster facts?”

“Mmhmm …” He groaned, unable to form a sentence. You finally felt him pull back before pushing into you in one fast, deep thrust, making you shiver. Your body was hardly used to feeling this full, but you wanted him so badly that it was humiliating, a pink blush tinting your nose. “You feel so good,” he muttered.

You pulled on his hair, and his head lifted from your neck. His lips were swollen from kissing you. Yours probably looked the same. But that didn’t matter right now as he held your gaze and began thrusting into you a little faster. His eyes were the color of melted gold, flecked with amber and brown, and you felt like you could stare into them forever while he fucked you. Laios lifted one of your legs higher on his waist, but his other hand stayed around your middle, keeping you nestled against him.

“Laios,” you whimpered, feeling him nudge your clit with each roll of his hips. Despite his desperation, his pace was tender and relaxed, making sure you were adjusting to his size. He knew he was big – clearly, it was something he’d been self-conscious about for a while – but the way you were looking at him right now … he’d never felt more at ease, more special. This was all he ever wanted: to be close to someone like this, to find intimacy with someone he had true feelings for. All the other times had been stepping stones, leading to this moment with you, where your warmth enveloped him so nicely and your gaze made him want to cum on the spot.

His hips began to move a little faster, pushing even deeper inside you, as his mouth swallowed your moans in a hungry kiss. Face going hot, you trembled, and his cock pulsed inside you with each pass. Your nails dragged down his shoulder blades, leaving marks for him to examine later, like a predator with its prey. Goosebumps raised on his skin, feeling himself get closer … and closer … and closer. If you kept digging your nails into him like that, he’d surely lose his grasp on reality. But you just felt so good, so warm, and he craved you. Craved you like you were his last meal.

“Laios,” you croaked out when his lips broke from yours, “Laios, are you close?”

He could hardly say anything else but, “Mm …” 

You thought you could get there by now from his tongue teasing you earlier, but you needed a little more friction. Bumping against your clit wasn’t enough. “Okay, okay,” you rambled, reaching down between your legs to touch yourself. “Just hold off for another minute. I’ll get there.”

Laios opened his eyes, realizing what you were doing, immediately envious of your own hand. “No, let me,” he murmured, voice like honey, and found your clit easily. “Then I can taste you on my fingers after.” His excitement made you laugh, which brought a smile to his own lips.

He shifted a little, pulling back so only his tip rested inside you, and fucked back into you at a different angle, one that brushed against your special spot. The stimulation of both your clit and g-spot had your back arching, whimpers slipping out of your lips like a chant.

“Is … this … better?” He asked, panting after each word.

Your voice was strained when you answered, “Y—Yes.”

His balls slapped against the underside of your ass, and he knew how close he was, but all he cared about at this moment was cumming together. He needed to see that look on your face when you reached your peak. He only got to see it a few times, when he lifted his eyes while tasting you, watching the way your lips parted and sweat ran down your forehead.

His fingers rubbed tight circles on your aching clit – knowing exactly what you liked – and you were close. So, so close already. Laios had a way of touching you that felt inquisitive, yet effortless. Like he wanted to learn which spots made you moan the loudest, while also already knowing without even touching you. You grew to like him not just because of his dopey grin, his protectiveness, or his positivity, but also for the way he was willing to learn with you, the way he needed you. And right now, he needed you to cum more than anything.

Tension coiled in your lower abdomen, making you gasp out, “Laios – fuck – Laios, I’m gonna –”

“I know, I know,” he rasped. His pace was nearing on brutal, his whole body shaking as he held off his release for you. “Together. We’ll – together.”

And then, your muscles tighten. You clenched around his cock, and it only took one more thrust against your g-spot to have you falling apart underneath him. You put a hand over your mouth as you cried out, careful of the rest of the party hearing. Your eyes rolled back, his fingers stroking your clit through it, and it all just felt too, too good. Your orgasm went on forever, wave after wave of pleasure crashing over you. As your walls spasmed around his cock, he groaned low, finally spilling into you. His hips stuttered. His mouth gasped for air against your lips, as he felt a ripple of relief from emptying himself inside you. He bit into your shoulder again to muffle his own noises. Your pussy convulsed, milking every last drop, and you were pretty sure you saw stars.

Once the aftershocks hit you both, he slumped against you, breathing in the scent of your hair again. Your fingers traced small circles onto his back muscles, your chest rising and falling with the fast beat of your heart. When his cock went soft inside you, his fingers finally left your clit and he brought them to his mouth. Your eyes were half-lidded as you watched him wrap his lips around his fingers and suck the juices off, moaning at the taste. He looked like an intricate painting; you couldn’t help but admire the sight.

His fingers left his mouth with a wet pop, and he whispered in a voice so soft you almost didn’t hear him, “You just taste so, so good.”

Laios kissed you again, slow and full of affection. You didn’t even care that he was still inside you; you could stay like this forever, pressed into his warm skin. Gods, you liked him so much that you immediately whimpered as his tongue slid into your mouth, and when he shuddered at your fingers on his back … you couldn’t believe you once questioned if he returned your feelings. You had both been so oblivious.

His mouth moved away from yours and he cupped your cheek. He took a moment to memorize the dusting of red across your face, the way your eyes hardly opened after sex, and then said, “Are you hungry? I think we both need a snack. It’s been a long night already.”

You giggled. “You had me at hungry.”

[sungstars]

slut me out | njm x fem!reader

i.e you needed to give your situationship the time of his life after seeing his instagram story.

word count: 2.8k (not proof read)

content warning: situationship, open ending, smut lol, oral (m. rec.), fingering (f. rec.), explicit sex, unprotected sex(no!), creampie, lmk if i missed anything thanks!

author's note: two fics in one day! can we believe this LOL. would you guys be surprised if i said that i have a mark one that i'm hoping to finish and it'll be queued up for tomorrow morning/afternoon. i hope you all enjoy this fic and as always, dedicated to my crazy and delusional bffs. likes & reblogs are appreciated as always. requests are open till october 5th! i'm still working on my jay fic, and hoping to have that out by tuesday!!

“you’re fucking crazy,” you said once the phone picked up after the first ring, “you can delete that story, i saw it.”

jaemin let out a hearty laugh, “hmm? but jisungie looks so cute, what if one of my followers wants me to put them on with him?”

you jeer, fingering hovering over the red button on the screen, “you definitely could’ve posted him without making sure your shirt is unbuttoned and they can see the chain that i bought you peeking through. what if they’re crazy like me?”

“don’t worry, nobody has you beat in that department.” jaemin added quickly, “you can come over if you want.”

did you want to? absolutely. you needed to rock his world so hard that it was likely to be rated a category 9.5 earthquake.

“you can come to me,” you quipped back, “and hurry up, i dont have a lot of patience. don’t change either.”

“you’re so demanding,” jaemin whined, a glint of playfulness evident in his voice, “i have to stop at my other hoe’s house first, but i’ll be there.”

“not even funny.” you hung up the phone, rolling your eyes.

focusing back on your room, you jumped up in a panic. you needed to change and also pick up the clothes you had thrown all over the place.

realistically, you didn’t know if jaemin was kidding about seeing somebody else first, but if he wasn’t, you had about twenty minutes including traffic before he got to your place.

you shoved all the loose piece of clothing into whatever drawer or laundry basket they would fit into. doing a once over your room, you were satisfied with what you were able to do.

looking at your floor length mirror, you didn’t care too much about what you had on. a big t-shirt with snoopy playing baseball on the front.

easy access for jaemin, but you should probably change your dingy halloween panties from victoria secret into something cute.

perhaps pink? that seemed on brand for tonight’s theme.

you were digging through your underwear drawer looking for that lacey pink thong you got from the mall a few weeks ago when you heard a knock on your door.

“fuck,” you said, slamming the drawer shut to no avail and rubbing your hands down your hair to smooth out any frizz, “fuck.”

the knocking got louder, causing you to practically trip on air as you ran to grab the door.

“took your sweet time letting me in,” jaemin pouted. leaning against the doorframe when you opened it, “that mad at me?”

rolling your eyes, you pulled him in by his silky pajama shirt and closing the door behind him, “guess she wasn’t that good if you got here within the same hour of calling.”

jaemin smiled, dropping down onto your couch and sliding his shoes off, “i’d say she was pretty damn good if i got done quickly and i’m not here.”

you crossed your arms, scoffing at his comment and began to walk to your bedroom.

“you’re such a dick.”

“i heard that,” he said, jumping off the couch to chase behind you, “i'm just kidding y/n, you know it's just you."

"are you sure? cause you keep making comments about other girls, are you trynna compensate? i don't care if you see other people."

jaemin laughed at you for the nth time this evening, making you want to just slam your bedroom door in his face and lock him out, but unfortunately for you, seeing jaemin in those pink pajamas and gold chain sent you into borderline ovulation.

you grabbed jaemin by the arm, leading him to sit on your bed and standing between his legs.

"it's just you," jaemin reassured, a hand coming up to rub your hip gently, "just like driving you crazy 'cause i know you're really fucking insane."

jaemin got a whiff of your secret cloud perfume as you leaned down and kissed his neck gently.

"i'm going to turn you every way but loose tonight," you whispered into his ear, teeth grazing the shell of his ear, "and i'm gonna show you how insane i am over you."

a shiver went down jaemin's back as you kissed down his neck and to his adam's apple, making sure to suck dark marks into his skin before placing your lips on his.

his arms wrapped your waist, pulling you down into his lap as he deepened the kiss. your hands found their way entangled into his brunette locks, moaning as he slipped his tongue into your mouth.

the two of you fought for dominance over the kiss, though jaemin just wanted to put up a good fight before letting you win.

you then slipped your tongue into his mouth, removing your hands from his hair and moving them down to his shoulders.

you gently pushed him back and onto the mattress, letting your fingers skillfully undo his pajama shirt, enjoying the smooth silk under your fingertips before pulling the shirt open.

jaemin pressed his hips up, hoping to get a small bit of friction on his growing erection and moaning when you rut your own hips down.

pulling away from the kiss, your chest heaved as you did a lookover his body. his plush lips swollen and glossy with spit, dark splots decorating his skin from earlier, his own defined chest moving rapidly as he tried to catch his own breath.

"you look so pretty under me, jaem," you complimented, your fingers dancing across his exposed collarbones and down his gold chain, "a sight only i should be allowed to see."

jaemin exhaled heavily through his nose, "a sight only for you. . please, don't stop. i want you. . i need you so badly, y/n."

how could you deny such a request from a pretty boy completely at your disposal? you weren't a cruel or dumb woman, so of course you'll comply.

you leaned down to attach your lips to his collarbone, biting and sucking gently as you made your way down his chest.

moving the pink fabric away, you let your tongue teasingly flick at his nipple to elicit a whiny moan from his mouth before taking his nipple between your lips.

"fuck y/n," he groaned, "that feels so good."

smirking to yourself, you pull off and stand up. the boy's eyes widened, trying to hold back another whine because why did you pull off? and why are you standing?

"c'mon," jaemin said, voice cracking slightly, "don't be a tease."

"a tease?" you titled your head as he sat up on his elbows, "if you beg, i'll consider."

a bright red hue cascaded over jaemin's face at your request, but he couldn't get any more pathetic than he already looked.

"y/n," he pleaded, "please do something. i am so undeniably hard, and if i don't feel those pretty lips or pretty hands wrapped around my dick that i know you love, i will implode and you'll be out of a bomb dick appointment and home."

a laugh escaped, jaemin really knew what to say to make you give into him. it's why you liked him honestly. he was funny and charming, and did in fact have a great dick that drove you insane. you used to be normal before he stuck his dick in you.

jaemin reached forward, grabbing your hand and placing it over his boner. that action alone could've made you cum in your panties because pathetic jaemin was probably your favorite jaemin.

you instinctively wrapped your fingers around it the best you could while it was restrained in those silky pants, slowly jerking him off and watching a bead of precum stain the fabric.

"see how hard i am?" he asked, breathily, "all for you. all because of you."

stroking your ego was one of the many things jaemin was good at, so you decided to play nicely and give him something to relief this tension you could feel growing in his body.

"take 'em off," you said, releasing his cock from your grip, moving back to give him room, "show me that pretty dick, jaem."

if you weren't standing in front of him, you were sure he would've fell face forward onto your carpet from how fast he was trying to get his pants down and off his hips.

once they were at his thighs, you leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss on his lips before sinking down to your knees.

you were face to face with jaemin's cock, the tip an angry shade of red and precum still leaking from his slit.

spit began to pool inside your mouth the longer you looked at it, and you stuck your tongue out to swipe the precum dribbling from his cock.

jaemin moaned out, hands gripping the sheets beneath him, “stop. . put it in your mouth.”

you furrowed your eyebrows and looked up, “don’t make demands.”

the brunette’s jaw ticked, one hand coming up to your hair and the other grabbing the base of his dick.

he pushed your head back roughly, tapping the head of his cock on your lips and smearing more precum across, “don’t be a fucking tease.”

your eyes widened in surprise at the switch in jaemin's demeanor, but instead of giving him a hard time, you complied by opening your mouth for him.

without hesitation, jaemin shoved his cock into your mouth until it hit the back of your throat which caused you to gag and tears well up in your eyes.

"don't get sensitive now," he mumbled, swiping the tears from your face, "now be good and suck. show me why you're my favorite."

his favorite? you should been his fuckin' only like he said you were earlier. what is up with the inconsistency? he's gonna piss you off.

you used your tongue to lick the under part of his cock, pulling off to leave just the tip in your mouth.

jaemin's grip on your hair tightened, trying his best to let you have control, but wanting nothing more than to just fuck your throat until you're sobbing.

you pulled completely off his cock, bringing your hand to jerk him off while you used your tongue to lick a stripe on his balls and gently suck.

the brunette's eyes rolled back, a string of moans and high pitched whines leaving his throat as you continued to toy with his balls.

whenever your hand reached the tip, you would squeeze every so slightly, causing him to fuck into your hand.

jaemin was close, and you could tell by the way he was whimpering and trying to chase your hand.

you looked up at him, smiling to yourself before pulling off his dick completely, basking in his borderline sob at the loss of contact.

"why did you stop?" tears welled up in his eyes, feeling like he would explode, "you're so fuckin' mean."

cooing, you wiped tears away from his eyes like he did earlier, "cause i knew you were close, jaem."

he sniffled, grabbing you and pinning you down onto the bed in one swift motion.

sometimes, you forget how strong he can be, causing you to get even more wet if that was possible. your panties were sticking almost uncomfortably to your cunt, and you were hoping he would do something to relief that soon.

too lost in your own thoughts of pleasure, you didn't even realize jaemin was pulling your t-shirt up until the cool air hit your nipples.

he used his lithe digits to roll your perked nipples around, causing you to squeal at the contact.

"love the panties," jaemin teased, using one of his hands to snap the waistband against your skin, "so cute and so soaked. god, you really get off from anything as long as it's me, huh?"

"you fuckin' wish," you tried to bite, but it came out as a whimper when he pressed his hand against your core, allowing for some friction of pleasure.

"shhh," he said, "can't even muster an ounce of niceness when i'm about to fuck you?"

jaemin flicked your nipples, smirking at your almost pained moan before moving down to take your underwear off, eyes watching how they were sticking to your sopping cunt, "so wet for me, hm?"

you nodded your head in compliance this time, "all for you."

he swiped a finger up your slit, bringing it to his mouth and licking it clean, "taste so sweet, but act so so mean towards nana, wonder why that is?"

you huffed, hooking a heel behind his thigh and pulling him close so his cock would make some contact with your cunt, a noise escaping your throat when the tip came into rough contact with your clit.

"that needy? what was it you said earlier? beg. beg for it, dumb whore."

degrading was something you and jaemin never tried, but with how effortlessly it slipped out of his mouth, you wish he would've done it sooner.

"jaem," you grinded against his cock, "please fuck me, y'know you want to. please, i need it so badly."

jaemin just looked at you unimpressed, dragging his cock up and down your cunt, looking at how you falter when his tip catches your sensitive bundle of nerves, "beg more."

you wanted to burst into tears, he knows how much you want him, he can feel how wet you are and probably at more slickness slipping out as he teased you, "nana, please put it in. i'll stop being mean, promise. i need your cock--i need you. please fuck me."

his left hand came up to smooth your hair out, smiling all his pearls at you as he slowly pushed the fat tip of his cock into you, finally.

jaemin slowly pushed himself into your cunt, moaning at how easily you took his cock, letting his hand fall from your hair and place pressure on your clit.

"it's like you were made for me, fuck" he gritted his teeth, thrusting shallowly into you, "taking me so well every time, your cunt just fuckin' sucks me in.. ha."

all you could do was moan in response, eyes rolling back when jaemin's gold chain smacked you in the nose, "fuck, too good."

jaemin rubbed your clit roughly as he picked his pace up, hips snapping against yours as your arousal ran down your thighs and his balls, creating a wet sound between the two of you.

you clenched around jaemin's cock, letting out high pitched noises of pleasure as he fucked you harshly, the knot in your stomach tightening and traveling down your pelvis.

"fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck" you cried, placing your hand on his lower abdomen and trying to push him away, but he quickly snatched it and held it above your head, "jaem, fuck, please, it's too much."

jaemin ignored your pleas, "y'know you can take it, stop trying to run from it."

when jaemin snapped his hips harshly once more, you felt that knot in your stomach break and ecstasy overtake your senses.

you couldn't even muster the feeling of embarassment from how good you felt when liquid practically sprayed your thighs and jaemin's abdomen.

the boy tapped the head of his cock on your clit, groaning loudly as you continued to squirt before roughly showing himself back into you.

"jaemin," you squealed, back arching up, "i can't! i can't."

"you can," he said, fucking you harshly, feeling himself getting closer and closer, "and you will take this dick. you wanna whine about other people havin' it so bad, take it, slut."

with jaemin fucking you so soon after an intense orgasm, all you could do was sob and mumble his name. it wasn't going to take you long to cum again, and jaemin could tell about how you were clenching on his dick.

your fingers dug into his shoulders, creating red crescents as his chain smacked you over and over again, his orgasm approaching any second.

"i'm so close, angel." he whined, his thrusts starting to stutter and slow down, "fuck, can i come inside please?"

"o-of course," you nodded your head, your own orgasm approaching once more, "please cum in me."

one more snap of jaemin's hips and he let out a loud moan, stilling himself as white hot ropes of his cum began to fill you and create a creamy ring around his cock, "fuck, you were too good."

he began to thrust slowly to ride out your orgasms, kissing your forehead and whispering sweet praises into your ear.

once you pushed his chest away to let him know he was overstimulating you, he pulled out completely and laid next to you, chest heaving rapidly.

"y/n." he turned on his side, "i really do like you."

you smiled, grabbing his hand and intertwining your fingers, "i really like you too jaemin."

he pressed a gentle kiss to your cheek and pulled you closer to him, "it's always been just you."

end!

[charlesxavierthirster3000]

Loops and Steel — L.Howlett

Pairing: Logan Howlett x Mutant!Reader

Summary: Your love for crocheting is apparent across the whole school, but a sense of reluctance clouds your vision at the thought of gift-giving towards Logan.

CW/Tags: fluff, kinda drags idk I'm sorry, REALLY stupid ending, not proofread I'm too lazy and it's sinus season, we have time manipulation powers guys, no use of Y/N, don't like don't read.

A/N: HELLO long time no fic guys (I'm going insane please help) this is honestly like so stupid idk why it's so FUCKING long hello???? Ik it's alr in the tags but the ending is like so extremely fucking stupid I'm humiliated....... Anyways guys try to enjoy this hahahaahhaha don't flame me pls

WC: 2.4K (holy SHIT girl) / Navigation

You had a thing amongst the X-Men— you were notorious for crocheting impromptu gifts for everyone, predominantly for winter use. No one in their right mind would voluntarily wear yarn in the summer, unless they had a thing for heat strokes. 

Well, to be fair, the craft store situated nearest to the mansion only sold the hefty type of yarn, so you physically couldn’t make anything light. But still.

Your hyperfixation on fibre arts had reached most of them— Scott with earmuffs which could be worn comfortably over his visor without disrupting the toggle, Storm and her suit-complimenting beanies, and Rogue who had received so many pairs of gloves she had to dedicate a whole drawer for them in her room. At this point, you'd woven your way through the whole mansion, pretty much everyone having received a small gift; the students with a 70% chance of having a simple keychain.

Everyone, except Logan.

It's not that you weren't fond of him—in fact, he was even up there with Rogue and the others— it's just.. he was always so reclusive. Yeah, you could hold a decently consistent conversation with him without breaking a sweat, but he seemed the type to brush gifts or tokens of appreciation off without a second thought. That’s what made you contemplate bestowing your handmade offerings of affection upon him.

If you wanted to say you were afraid of impending rejection, it wouldn’t be true. You’d handed some keychains to a few uptight kids you taught, and the sight of the metallic glint attached to a scrap of vibrant yarn in the rubbish didn’t affect you. Perhaps it was because they were only a clique of immature youngsters, but your ego wasn’t usually even touched that easily no matter the level of maturity.

So why were you so uncertain?

Inwardly, you somewhat knew that there was a chance— you craved his validation. Which was really, very pathetic. Your ego was not nearly as inflated as his, but acknowledging the info would undoubtedly have an effect on it, so you kept the classified data under lock and key. Well, maybe Charles knew. But even if he did, he fortunately kept your dignity intact.

Nevertheless, you’d gotten tipsy humiliatingly early in the night after spending quality time with Ororo and ended up stumbling back to your room, determined to overcome your inner wimp and make something for Logan. You brainstormed for approximately 7 minutes before coming with a conclusion; gloves. Just like the many pairs you'd created for his ‘friend’. 

‘I’m your friend, not your father,’ the idiot stated. Bullshit. Abso-fucking-lute bullshit. You heard them when passing by in the corridor on the way to a class and had to restrain using your powers to rewind that short burst of time just so you could shut Logan up and shove those words right back up his ass.

But unfortunately, you realised a little too much time later— after the alcohol-established period of boldness had subsided, of course— that you were still very much a pussy. Perhaps you were lost in the suppression of the alcohol, because you'd somehow already ended up with a pair of specialised gloves with slits, strong magnets fastened to the edges which accommodated the adamantium of Logan's claws.

If everything fell into accordance with your brainstorming, the magnets would automatically adjust to the position of the protruding metal under his skin every time he slid them on. Damn it, why weren't you this creative when you were sober? Maybe you should drink more. If only you had his healing factor; then your liver wouldn't be fucked for life.

You glanced up at the clock on your bedroom wall, bracing yourself for the ridiculously early time unavoidably displayed upon the aged face. 

10:21 p.m.

Fucking hell. Basically the whole goddamn mansion was still up, the younger kids an exception. It was a weekend, after all. 

After a short-lived interval of contemplation, you concluded two options. You had the option of using your energy and abandoning the project without physically undoing the whole thing; pretending it never happened, or B, actually fucking overcome your disconcerting fear of giving Logan a gift.

You'd deeply considered the first option.

Very. Deeply.

But in a self-ball-kicking resolution, you chucked your own uncertainty far, far down your throat and decided on simply marching over to Logan and handing him the navy pair of gloves.

⁠⊰⁠⊹ฺ

Mentally uttering repeated strings of curses, you approached his bedroom door— you figured that was where he was, anyway. He wasn't in his usual place; the grimy couch in front of the fireplace which was almost literally hanging on by a thread. 

Earlier, you'd taken a glimpse at the contents of the fridge in hopes of a tasty Swiss roll miraculously appearing, but instead noticed the fact that there was no beer. To conclude, Logan was probably restraining himself from impaling Scott and fermenting him into his own ‘Cyclops-made Heineken’.

Your hands fidgeted with the stitches on the openings for his claws, thumb running over the cool, metallic surface of the small magnets. God, why were you stressing this so hard? Logan was just a guy with kitty claws and a half-assed personality. He wasn't that intimidating, especially when dormant and presumably partially asleep by now. He was—literally— an old man at heart. The dude probably couldn't even stay up past 11:30.

Ultimately, you took a sharp breath before raising your free hand and firmly rapping at the door twice. Your ears picked up the faint rustle of a page turning and the brief thud of a book cover falling shut.

He was reading? Damn, guess your old man description was accurate after all. A shift of position, and the creak of a wooden chair groaning under his weight. “It's open.”

You skeptically twist the knob and push on the door, poking your head through the crack before stepping in and gently pushing it shut behind you. He's leant against his table in a semblance of leisure, gaze fixed on the metal of his dog tags as he wipes them with a thin tissue.

Your own gaze drifts to his tousled sheets, zeroing in on the faint outline of a bulky book poorly concealed by the covers. You have to curb the grin threatening to spread onto your face at the sight. He's embarrassed. 

Tragically, an unsuccessfully stifled sound somewhere between a snort, a giggle, and a spray bottle escapes your throat, “I didn't know you could read.”

The hands on his necklace halt as he looks up at you cautiously. “...What?”

You smile with feigned innocence, “I didn't know you read.”

He cocks an eyebrow, scoffing out a dry laugh. “That wasn't what ya said the first time. And I don't read.”

You suppress a snicker at his clearly veiled shame and nod over to the vague outline under his blanket. “What's that, then? Sure as hell isn't a woman.”

His eyes narrow in on you as he rises, sauntering over menacingly like he was in some type of slasher. Your smile only widens. You decide to just taunt him even more, even though it probably wasn't the greatest idea to do so to someone with metal claws. But even if you did get attacked, you could travel back and act as if it never happened.

He glares down at you, head tilted. You thought you glimpsed a twinge of humour behind the hazel, and it only adds fuel to the fire. “Whatcha readin’? Pride and Prejudice? Little Women? I presume it's a classic— y’know, considering your ag—”

An unprompted, somewhat restrained grin crawls onto his lips as he cuts you off, “Why’re you here, bub? ‘Cause 'm sure as hell you’re not here just to ask for a goddamn book review.”

Fuck. Gloves.

Heart abruptly starting to hammer in your chest, you nonchalantly shove a hand in your pocket and squeeze the coarse yet soft material of the acrylic yarn. You swallow thickly, fidgeting with a fuzzy you somehow already managed to get your fingers on, heat dragging down your ears and spreading across your face. Gosh, you probably look mortified right now.

You swear under your breath, fumbling the gloves out of your pocket. “Right—” you clear your throat, displaying them out in front of you like it was a grenade with the pin pulled. A flash of curiosity crosses his features; a cloud moving past the sun. Well, the other way round. If that was scientifically possible.

“I made these for you.” You toss them at him and he swiftly catches them mid-air, all while you stare at the fibre like you half expected each individual stitch to spontaneously combust. You unfortunately weren't Scott, so you couldn’t laser-eye the thing. “Figured freezing your fingers off might— uh—cramp your little ‘best there is at what I do’ thingy.”

He gives the intricate stitching a once-over, turning the solid navy gloves over in his hands. A smirk tugs at the corners of his lips and an eyebrow raises curiously as he regards the claw openings. “Made ‘em for me?” 

The rhetorical inquiry makes your eyes almost instinctively roll. “No. Made ‘em for fucking Magneto. Of course it's for you. Who the fuck else has claws?”

He slips one on and hoists an accusing eyebrow at you. “Don’t get ya panties in a twist, Time Bomb. Look like Pyro jus’ blew a fire in your face.”

You defensively fold your arms in front of your chest, trying your level best to ignore the itch to lift a certain finger situated between your index and ring. “Hey, you're not exactly a joyride to talk to, let alone give a gift.”

He scoffs, sliding the other glove on and flexing his fingers. “You tryna bend my bones? I can feel ‘em followin’ the magnets. Neat trick, though.” Unexpectedly, he pops his claws out with a snikt, prompting you to reflexively flinch and step back. “Jeez, Claws! Watch the face.”

He groans, “God, you're a diva.”

“What can I say? Sort of a package deal with the whole ‘Time-Waster’ schtick. You're way more of a diva than I am anyway,” you grin sarcastically bright.

There's a glimmer of amusement in the green-ness of his eyes, and you unfortunately find yourself reveling in it.

Turning on his heel, he clicks his tongue once and nods in a gesture for you to get on the bed. The action takes you aback by the unbridled directness of it, but you end up crawling up onto the cool covers regardless. “I was just here to give you those, y’know? I can leave if you want.”

He somewhat shakes his head as he settles on the chair opposite your position perched on the edge of the bed. “Stick around, ‘s not like I mind,” the words are delivered in his usual sardonic tone, but you detect an underlying sense of insistence.

Fuck. Was he laying the charm on real thick tonight, or were you just delusional?

You bite the inside of your cheek, scooching back and settling in a little more confidently. “Stick around?” you echo, teasing lilt in your tone despite how much his reassurance affects you. “Since when do you enjoy company? Or do you just wanna sit over there and brood while I talk my tongue off?”

He huffs, the noise more entertained than anything. “Don’t mind when it's yours. Quieter than anythin’ else anyway.”

The words hit you like a blow to the gut with how casual the delivery is— as if he was just making his usual comment on the tactics he could use to get rid of Scott. Inevitably, the warmth already lingering on your face strengthens as you find a response. 

“Quieter? High praise. I'm flattered, Howlett. And here I was under the impression that I’m ‘Most Likely to Talk Your Ear Off’ according to my old yearbook,” you laugh dryly, attempting to ease the nearly tangible tension hanging in the air between the two of you. 

That half-smirk makes its way back onto his lips as his gaze turns a touch more intent, “Ain't news to me. Still want ya to stay.”

Holy shit. Is he trying to cause you an agonisingly slow death? You were clearly trying to manage this whole interaction with sarcasm, but he wasn't letting any of it slide.

You swallow cautiously, throat suddenly a narrow pathway leading down to your rapidly flipping stomach. Hauling your legs up onto the bed and placing your weight back onto the headboard, you try to alleviate the voice in your head convincing you this was something further than platonic. “Wow. If I knew you were this sentimental I would've prepared a speech before I came in here. Gloves can't nearly be enough.”

He snorts, “Don't push it, bub.”

You raise your hands in feigned surrender, a grin spreading across your lips. “Okay, okay. Fine,” you mutter, brushing imaginary lint off your sleeve in a futile attempt to compose yourself. “How do you like the gloves anyway?”

He looks down at his hands in his lap like he'd just realised he was still wearing them. “Warm.”

You gawk at him incredulously. “Warm? C’mon, I deserve better than that, Log. I crocheted ‘em drunk. Practically risked my fingers. Y’know how I am under the influence— could’ve found a way to fucking impale myself with the hook or something.”

He grunts absentmindedly— gaze seemingly too focused on your face as if he was admiring you more than the gloves. But like him snapping out of a trance, his attention is almost immediately diverted back to the stitching when he processes your statement. “I'll be usin’ ‘em. Smart move for the claws. Don't have to destroy ya hard work when I pop ‘em out.”

Sighing dramatically, you lean back against the back of the bed with your arms splayed behind your head. Taking on your usual route, you taunt him in a flat tone, “Guess that's the highest form of Logan Howlett appreciation I'm gonna get tonight. Have I reached my quota? It's a shame; I'm such a thoughtful, empathetic, charisma—”

A low chuckle graces his reaction as he cuts you off, “God, really testin’ your luck tonight, aren't ya?”

You shrug, a giggle bubbling up your own throat— some of the emotion-filled tension lifting off the atmosphere as you get back to your usual banter, “What can I say? Maybe next time I'll make you a tophat— perhaps a red tailcoat to go with it, if I'm feeling real dedicated.”

He glances up at you skeptically, an eyebrow once again raised as he scrutinises your expression, “Oddly specific, Time Bomb. Ya know somethin’ I don't?”

You beam at him, observing the way it only enhances his skepticism. “Possibly. Somewhere in the far, far future, you're one of the greatest there are.”

Special credits to this song for making me push through the final stretch of this fucking fic 😭😭😭😭

[natalchartnurtures]

PAC: Mitski, what about me is eternal like the.. moon?

I had so much fun doing this

~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 1:

'Cause my love is mine, all mine I love mine, mine, mine Nothing in the world belongs to me But my love is mine, all mine, all mine

I'm sitting right in front of your cards in utter awe. I got goosebumps when I laid eyes on your cards, pile 1. Let me begin by saying this: you've seen some DARK and truly terrible times, haven't ya? Even as I say this, it feels like an understatement. There have been times when you were stripped down to bare bones, and you had to "grow back the rest of you." I apologize for the gruesome metaphor (but hey, I'm just the messenger; this ain't really coming from me :p). Maybe you've had to encounter times when you felt painfully lonely, stuck in your head and in your general life too, like your spirit was beaten down. Or maybe it felt as if the universe snatched away something you thought was incredibly precious? But I hear that it wasn't what you thought it was; that's why it had to go. You probably didn't see it that way at all, and THAT'S ALRIGHT because we don't have Spirit's perspective, now do we? I see that you really struggled to put yourself together after that somewhat 'impossible-seeming' loss. It seemed like it came outta left field.

BUT GUESS THE FUCK WHAT. You, my friend, took this PAIN and these fucked up times and turned it into a damn palace of gold. You read that right. What's eternal about you? Your alchemy. Your fire. Your willpower. Your ability to take life by the balls. Your refusal to let it beat you to dust. Your refusal to be small. Literal goosebumps, you feeling it yet? It's your connection to God/Source/Universe. Your faith. Your mastery of your mind, babe. Yeah. You've somehow mastered your mind in this process of putting yourself back together. Acknowledge that ish! 'Cause you really did do that.

Nothing can ever get you to stop dreaming, and much less trying to stop you from achieving them, love. You're a powerhouse of energy, and God bless anybody who ever underestimates that (you included side-eyeing you right now). Not you getting low key called out, haha.

Don't get me wrong, though; being a powerhouse of energy doesn't necessarily mean being in everybody's face trying to assert your dominance, y'know? It can look like silent crying in the middle of the night and waking up the next day determined to overcome the thing that made you cry the day before.

Your light is what's eternal about you. It never goes off. Like ever. Your dedication to learning and growing through whatever, and I mean WHATEVER, life throws your way is what will never die, sweetie. It's like a part of your essence at this point. I hope you're proud of that and know that it's what will bring you to your success in life, whatever that looks like for each one of you beautiful ass people reading this :)

Haha, that's so cute; I just heard Spirit go "you're going places, sweetheart" ><

And with that, let's end your FABULOUS, goosebumps-inducing (btw, I don't say that about just ANYTHING), and awe-inspiring reading here.

Thank you, pile 1, for sharing your energy with me today. I love you guys so, so much and… not gonna lie, I'm low key honored to have been in your presence today. Haha, see ya!

~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 2:

My baby, here on earth Showed me what my heart was worth So, when it comes to be my turn Could you shine it down here for her?

My god, why is there so much happening as I tap into your energy, pile 2? And I mean it in a nice way, though. I heard T Swift's song "The Last Great American Dynasty" as I was shuffling for you, and I heard Spirit go, "she's sweet and salty," lol. We'll see how all that plays into the reading eventually.

The first thing I noticed was your incredible balance within your mind and heart. It's shocking. Maybe you've been working on getting these aspects of yours to agree with one another and balance each other out, or it's simply your personality, but… pile 2, this beautiful mind-heart balance is what's eternal about you, love. Your peace. Your calm. The childlike innocence of your heart blending seamlessly with your mind's unending curiosity for life. Your emotional intelligence. The way you flow… like water, I heard. Wow! I find that so amazing, ugh, like can we be friends, pile 2? T-T, 'cause I definitely need some of that in my life right now, not gonna lie, haha.

There's that AND then there's a whole other dimension to you where you give 'life of the party' vibes as well. OH, so maybe that's why I heard Spirit say "sweet and salty," like two very different things but produce a wonderful taste together. Complex. Addicting. You make people want to come back for more, pile 2. Mmmmmm! Love that!

You have this laid-back vibe to you as well that a lot of people in your life appreciate. I see that your ability to lighten anybody's day is what's eternal about you awwww. I heard "she's the sunshine of my life." UGH, this is too wholesome for my heart; please save me. You seem to really perk up people's day/week or just life in general. You give, like, Saggi vibes, bro. It doesn't matter if you have that in your chart, but it's just your soul. The eternal aspect of you feels bright, expansive, loving, and so vibrant in energy, my god. You've also got strong feminine energy too… you must be really good at attracting 'cause you're strong in your feminine energy AND you're chill and detached from it at the same time. Effortless manifester, master manifester are some words that come to mind as I describe this.

Your divinity is what's eternal about you. Your 'witchy vibes.' Your embodiment of your highest truth. Your commitment to maintaining this divine connection in your day-to-day. Bro, what's eternal about you is that you can turn any old mundane task/thing into something fun and magical and full of meaning and symbolism. You live life deep, and even though there aren't a whole lotta people who can join you there, you wouldn't have it any other way. It's your raw authenticity, babe. Circling back to "The Last Great American Dynasty" song, maybe you're like Rebekah that T Swift sings about, "the most shameless woman this town has ever seen." People tend to call raw, authentic women shameless, but you couldn't care less. You will forever do what you like 'cause you're a free-spirited divine mystic in the body of a teeny lil human. Love it.

That's all I have for you, pile 2. Thank you for spending time with me! I love you so much <3

~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 3:

Moon, tell me if I could Send up my heart to you? So, when I die, which I must do Could it shine down here with you?

Ah, my divine activators. What's eternal about you? Your intensity. BS detection might as well be your middle name. Sherlock Holmes who? 'Cause you're the new detective in town, baby, sniffing out illusions, falsities, fake people, LIES, victim mentality. None of that runs free with you around, I'll tell you that. It's your capacity to hold divine truth, lovingly, which is INCREDIBLY hard, btw. You can't stand half-assed people and people who seem to not have their "heads screwed on straight." Lmao, what kinda people are you surrounded by, pile 3? Ooh, I heard that you're divinely planted where you are so you can activate a lot of people into awakening to their true selves, but it looks like nobody wants to actually awaken. Lmao.

-Side note: My heart goes out to you if you've been surrounded by really difficult and chaotic energies that bring you down a lot. That SUCKS so hard, bro. Been there myself too lately, and it's not a fun merry-go-round to co-exist with. Just keep being your amazing cool-ass self, ok? Things will work out eventually. You already intuitively feel that things will get better, so trust that feeling!-

If I could describe your energy, I would use the Phoenix rising from the ashes symbolism to do so. Ohhhhh, as I told you that, I saw a vision of T Swift's music video of "Look What You Made Me Do," where she comes out of the grave and sings, "Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time." I'm a fan, pile 3. Omg. That's some badass ballsy energy, and I'm so here for it right now. You're the epitome of what psychological death and rebirth looks like. You're the textbook definition. And THAT'S what's eternal about you. No matter where you are or what you end up doing in life, you'll always be able to "rise up from the dead" and do it iconically too. Haha, I literally heard that. Lmao. This ability of yours is an extension of the greater aspect of you - your higher self. Whoa… I just heard you've had this ability for lifetimes and you will take it strongly with you to the next ones as well. Powerful. It's etched in your soul, pile 3. You know what you want and how to get it, even if not immediately; you always do eventually. It's the security you possess within yourself that's eternal, love. Nothing can really shake you at this point. Lmao. You've got a strong-ass foundation.

-Side note: I'm really seeing a healed and fully realized root chakra for you. If you haven't gotten there yet, you're well on your way! Good job! Root chakra work is the most brutal, btw, so… you really have my respect. Haha, moving on-

You have warrior energy present quietly in your personality as well. You give spiritual warrior vibes. You don't prefer to live in it 24/7; it's simply something you tap into when a situation calls for it. Otherwise, I see you being quite heart-centered, full of love, looking at the world with rose-colored glasses. Your inner child is what's eternal about you. Your divine sensitivity and your capacity to hold your emotions without judgment and live big from a place of heart. You embody the energy of water in my eyes, tbh. Life-giving but also destructive if need be, and there's absolutely nothing weak about water. Phew. You are eternal as the oceans are.

Ahhh, pile 3, that was sooo much fun! Thanks for stopping by, and I love you soooo much!

~~~~~~~~~~~

[love-toxin]

just read your latest billy fic and am now obsessed with the idea of billy babytrapping you and/or having a massive, unhinged breeding kink. in his mind you won't ever leave him if he gets you pregnant.

(please bear with my ramblings below)

billy obsessively tracking your cycle and going at it like rabbits when you're ovulating. sex that goes on for HOURS because he wants to get multiple loads inside of you, just to be sure. plugging you up afterward so all his cum stays inside. constantly telling you what a good parent you would be, and how beautiful your children would be because he's pretty, and you're pretty, so it just makes sense, right?

I really think he'd get so delusional about it. burying his face in your arousal and insisting he can tell you're fertile just by the smell/taste. bending down to whisper in your ear only to tell you how full and achey his balls are getting. leaving you little gifts but they're all pregnancy tests or baby clothes. forget whatever stage of a relationship or situationship you guys are in, he's starting a family with you. he'd get such an ecstatic glint in his eye when you finally tell him you're pregnant. don't get me started on the pregnant belly worship.

tl;dr if billy fucks me and I'm not sitting in a puddle of his cum afterwards, I don't want it‼️🗣

PRRRRRR!!!! yes. im into it. now u have to bear with MY ramblings

(cws: babytrapping, fem pronouns)

Feels like babytrapper Billy is an untapped gold mine--it's less that he wants a baby at first and mostly just that he wants control over you, but that switches up real fast when you actually get knocked up. When you actually wanna be sweet about it. Fussing about cribs and a nursery and having enough baby clothes, making him take you to the ultrasound appointments and actually getting a 'tude with him because he did this to you and now he's gonna have to deal with just as much as you have to carrying his baby.

But Billy ends up loving the shit out of it. He loves your attitude. He loves your mood swings. He loves your hormonal cravings and your tears when you throw up morning after morning. He loves holding your hair back and stuffing your bed full of pillows so you're comfortable, and he loves laying his head on your belly and hearing those little gurgles and feeling those little kicks from his baby.

At the same time, however, it makes him emotional. If this is how he feels before his baby is even here, then why would...how could his father ever treat him the way he does, and did? How could anybody do that to a kid? It makes him angry at himself for the way he was treated and the way he took that out on Max, too. He's got lots of apologies to make. Those experiences don't take up all his attention, though--he has a pretty partner to care for now, and having that to fill his time over bouncing from party to party and girl to girl just to feel something makes him unbelievably satisfied.

It honestly makes him glad that he never knocked anyone up accidentally leading up to when he met you. It had to be you, he knows that now. It had to be you that he coerced, begged, and fucked into submission to make you his, it had to be your womb that he wanted so badly to break and your pussy he wanted to risk going raw into. Wouldn't you just be the cutest with a baby, anyways? You're such a catch and you're so pretty. You'd make such adorable babies. It's obvious he never wanted to be one of those guys with a handful of baby mamas and kids he rarely sees; he wants you and your kids and that's it. It's official--you've hooked Hawkins' resident playboy into a dedicated partner and father, whether you wanted to or not.

If there's one thing he loves most about your pregnancy though, it's that he loves your neediness. He loves that something seems to click in you that makes you pine for the man whose seed you've sown, like there's an invisible connection between you two that pulls you both closer. It's like you're instinctually drawn to him and he hopes, god he hopes that continues after you've had the baby. He's ready to make love to a woman after she's had a child (after you've healed sufficiently, of course, he can wait) it's like that next stage of maturity for him. He can't wait to see how far you've come and how much you've sacrificed just to have his baby, and he can't wait to look you in the eyes and tell you he wants another. No, he doesn't want you to work off the baby weight first or fuss with your hair or your clothes to try and get back to looking like you were before. He wants you now. As you are. Raw. He's sick of those prissy party-girl snobs and their perfect bodies and their permed hair that they can't let get messed up. He wants the woman who stays up all night feeding his daughter and rolls her eyes at his flirting attempts in the morning. He's totally whipped, and even with those bags under your eyes and that tension headache behind his from the crying of his precious baby girl, he still wants another. And he's got ways of making sure that you do, too...after all, he got you into it the first time, right?

[drunk-person]

Study Session

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x classmate!reader

Summary: Aemond is assigned to a college work with Y/n, an absent-minded art student who doesn't give a damn about philosophy. Things don't go well since she doesn't help him at all, until the two come to an unorthodox agreement that ends the impasse.

WARNING: 18+ mdni! secret crush, semi-nudity, voyeurism, breast fetish, exchange of academic favors for "sex", modern au, no description for reader.

Word cont: 3.200k

Author's note: This just came to my mind while doing some really boring work and I ended up writing it. The Rosby house is close to Kings Landing so I chose this surname for the reader, I hope you like it.

Dedicated to the poor readers of The Gossip who read chapter 7 and are in need of some comfort for their souls after all that mess hahaha I love you all! English is not my first language 💕💕🥰

Y/n was so frustrated. That class was absolutely hellish and if it wasn't mandatory in her schedule she would certainly never even pass in front of the door. The only reasonable side to all of this was the fact that Aemond Targaryen sat in front of her during this unbearable class. He could be as arrogant as he wanted if he continued to be so hot.

The girl bit her lip as she stared at the back of his pale neck that was exposed to her eyes since his long silver hair was tied in a bun due to the heat wave. The two had never exchanged more than a few words, but Y/n couldn't help it, he was too handsome and intelligent for his own good.

She didn't know how he could understand that subject and answer all the questions the teacher asked as if they were obvious to him. Y/n did her best to hide her crush, but whenever no one was looking she couldn't help but sigh lightly as she looked at him.

She was barely in the same reality as the rest of the class when she heard her name being called harshly by the professor, pulling her out of her deep thoughts and back to real life.

-I'm sorry, professor, I was distracted. - She looked down, blushing when she realized that the whole class was looking at her while letting out light giggles.

-Which seems to be a very common occurrence with you, doesn't it? - The man spoke in an irritated voice and Y/n felt her face heat up even more.

-If you're interested in knowing, Miss Rosby, we're holding a draw for pairs of work for the semester. - The professor was still looking at Y/n as he spoke and reaching into the jar, he pulled out a new piece of paper.

-Aemond Targaryen.

Y/n felt her heart stop momentarily when she heard that name. Would her semester partner be Aemond Targaryen? The gods must have wanted to play with her.

-Good luck, Mr Targaryen, you will need it. - The man said, making the whole class laugh, except for Aemond, who, without Y/n noticing, glared at the teacher when he heard the mean joke.

After the class ended, the room gradually emptied, while the few remaining students put their books and notebooks in their backpacks. Aemond finished writing some notes in his notebook under the watchful eye of Y/n, who was anxiously waiting to talk to him.

And when he turned towards her with that serious look and that sculpted face, Y/n smiled and pretended to be disinterested.

-I don't understand half of what that man says. - She shrugged, staring at him while Aemond frowned. - I hope it won't be a problem for you to be my partner.

-Maybe you would understand if you spent more time paying attention in class and less time drawing. - Aemond rolled his good eye, putting away his own books while Y/n felt her belly heat up.

How did he know she was drawing in class if he had his back to her the whole time?

-I don't like studying boring things that guys who died centuries ago said and that don't make any sense.

-But do you like studying works that boring guys who died centuries ago painted and that don't make any sense? - He raised his eyebrows ironically, looking at her and Y/n's mouth slightly opened, not knowing what to say.

-That… That's not the point.

-Mmmm… if you say so. - The irony was poignant in his voice and expression and Y/n slightly narrowed her eyes, feeling the urge to argue more without knowing what to answer.

-They… They're not meaningless! - She snorted in annoyance and Aemond just let out a nasal laugh while raising his eyebrows.

-Most of them are just a bunch of meaningless scribbles. - He rolled his eyes, putting his backpack on his back.

-The name is surrealism, and perhaps underdeveloped minds don't understand it very well! - Y/n lifted her chin, pulled her own bag onto her shoulder and pressed the sketchbook against her chest, leaving before Aemond, leaving him with a mischievous smile on his lips as he watched her leave.

Y/n rolled her eyes, irritated with herself as she walked towards the open courtyard of the college, sitting at a stone table and throwing her bag on it, seriously considering diverting her idiotic crush on Aemond Targaryen to another guy.

Unfortunately for her, at the same moment the thought crossed her mind, his soft voice called her from behind and the hairs on the back of the girl's neck stood on end at the same moment, making her snort.

-We need to decide where and when we're going to meet to start the work. - He murmured and Y/n turned to look at him, snorting when she saw that he looked even more attractive with the sunlight shining through his silver hair.

In the natural light, the prosthetic eye was more visible than indoors, as was the thin scar that ran from the eye to the forehead and cheek. Y/n didn't give a shit, she just thought he looked even hotter if that was possible.

-Rosby? - Aemond called her, his voice miles away from taking her out of her self-imposed trance.

-I'm sorry, I got a bit distracted. - She shook her head, trying to focus on the conversation, and Aemond turned his face to the side, smiling discreetly at the action. - What did you say?

-We'll meet to start work.

-Oh, yes, yes. - She nodded thoughtfully. - How about the library?

-I don't study in the library, there are always idiots who go there to make a mess and interfere with concentration. - Aemond rolled his eyes with a frown, making her rack her brain to remember if she had ever messed up in the library.

-Yeah. They're all idiots! - She agreed, rolling her eyes when she came to the conclusion that she hadn't done anything wrong in the college library.

-We can go to my dorm. - Y/n shrugged, trying to be casual. - But my roommate is always there and never turns off the TV.

-Don't you have your own room? - He looked at her confused and Y/n laughed.

-Not all of us can own the campus. - She grimaced and Aemond rolled his eyes.

-Your family has money too.

-Having money is different from being a filthy rich Targaryen. - She grumbled as she gestured lightly with her hands, arching her eyebrows, and Aemond didn't contest her.

-Whatever, let's meet in my dorm, it's empty there and no one will disturb us.

Y/n nodded, subtly biting her lower lip at the idea that she would go to Aemond's room.

-Where is it? - She came back to reality, remembering to ask, and asking her for a pen, Aemond wrote down the number and the floor on the last page of the sketchbook that was on the table.

-See you on Friday. - He murmured, turning around and leaving her as soon as he finished writing, making her sigh once more at hearing that voice so close to her.

♤♡

Y/n did her best to look beautiful in the most disinterested way possible. Just a gray blouse with black denim shorts and a thin black coat on top, her hair tied with a simple clip and just a bit of lipstick. It was almost how she looked every day, except for the fact that she wasn't wearing a bra, but with the coat on top he probably wouldn't even notice that fact.

Apart from the fact that when she got there she discovered that they were fixing the cooling system in Aemond's building and now she was without the coat and wearing only the thin blouse, attracting Aemond's discreet glance at her from time to time.

The two spread their materials across the table in the living room connected to the bedroom and sat on the floor to study. Unfortunately, Aemond was having more trouble concentrating in his own room than in the library, with the sight of Y/n in that blouse in front of him, scribbling drawings on her philosophy book while pretending to read something.

When he finally managed to read a few words, he could hear her melodious laughter from the other side of the table.

-What is it? - He murmured almost in a growl making her become serious.

-It's just that I'm watching and I think my shared dorm room would fit inside yours.- She shrugged and Aemond rolled his eyes without giving a verbal response.

Minutes later, when he went back to reading focused and taking some important notes, her voice rang out once again, distracting him.

-I'm so lazy. - Y/n threw herself onto the philosophy books open on the coffee table in Aemond's dorm room, and he slightly arched his eyebrows.

-You haven't done anything so far. - He grumbled as he took note of an important quote that he would probably use in the future during the work.

-Because this subject is totally boring. - The girl mumbled with her head still lying on the books but now with her face turned towards Aemond looking at him while slowly blinking her eyes feeling a little sleepy. Until now, nothing interesting had happened outside of her imagination.

-Boredom or not, I think it's better to start working on your part, because there's no way I'm going to give you credit for something you didn't do. - Aemond looked at her very seriously while Y/n sulked, crossing her arms under her breasts, slightly drawing the older man's attention there again.

-Are you always this boring, Targaryen? - Y/n snorted, making one of the loose strands of hair fly out of her pretty face.

-This isn't boring, this is justice. - His eyes were still discreetly fixed on the subtle neckline of the gray blouse that Y/n was wearing, except that now she noticed it, feeling her stomach tingle with the idea that Aemond Targaryen was looking at her.

-Talking about justice and being a total pervert. - She slightly pressed her eyes to him while tightening her arms under her breasts, making them more prominent, making Aemond cough with a subtle choke, looking away.

-Mmmm, I wasn't looking at your breasts. - He grunted looking in another direction.

-Ah, you certainly were. - She arched her eyebrows laughing. - If you want to know, women always know when you're looking.

-What's that? A weird sixth sense? - Aemond raised his eyebrows in disbelief, still a little embarrassed for having been caught.

-Something like that. - Y/n shrugged with a slight grimace, but then an idea popped into her head making her subtly bite her lower lip, staring at him as she gathered her courage.

-How about we make a deal? - Y/n was still biting her lower lip without believing she was actually going to say that to him.

-What kind of deal? - Aemond tilted his forehead, confused but interested, while his eyes inadvertently fell once again on her breasts.

-I'll let you be a perv and look at my boobs, and you do my part in this stupid job. - She suggested, slowly poking the hem of her own thin blouse under the attentive gaze of Aemond, who felt his own mouth drying up.

-Mmmm. - He mocked her with an ironic smile. - No deal. This work is almost 30 pages long, I want to at least be able to touch them.

-What? - She narrowed her eyes slightly while arching her right eyebrow now, not believing what he was saying.

-That's right, and you'll be topless while i writing the work. It's that or nothing. - He smiled maliciously as he arched his eyebrows, waiting for her answer, being almost certain that she would give up on the idea.

-Gods, you're more perv than I thought. - She grumbled, staring at him with a frown as she tried to process the fact that Aemond Targaryen really had asked to touch her boobs.

-Do we have a deal? - Aemond asked, still with a dirty smile on his face, and Y/n rolled her eyes at him, mumbling something to herself, unable to call him an idiot since she had given him the idea.

-We have a deal. - She spoke firmly, feeling soft shivers down her thighs as she said this, making Aemond subtly widen his eyes in shock at her accepting. - But… I don't want to read a single sentence about this subject, I don't want to know about these idiot philosophers and much less about their silly theories.

-These aren't silly theories… - Aemond rolled his eyes condescendingly at the girl's lack of understanding on such an important subject, it almost affected the crush he had on her… almost.

-Ah. - She cut him off instantly. - I don't want to know. Deal?

-Deal. - He grimaced in slight disgust, if she weren't so hot it wouldn't be worth all the effort, Aemond thought rolling his eyes.

With a sigh Y/n pulled the gray blouse of thin fabric over her head leaving her bare breasts exposed to Aemond's hungry and raw gaze that made her skin crawl almost instantly.

The moment she took off her blouse, Aemond took away his previous thought. She was certainly worth the effort and he would definitely do a thousand jobs like that just to take a look at those breasts.

Feeling confident under his gaze Y/n sat on the two-seater sofa and once again crossed her arms under her now bare breasts while looking at him with one of her eyebrows raised.

Taking a deep breath, Aemond sat down next to her, staring at that beautiful pair of breasts that he could say for sure were the most beautiful he had ever laid eyes on in his life.

-Can I? - He reached out his hands to her breasts, but stopped just before touching them, wanting her to be one hundred percent sure of what she was doing. And when the girl nodded positively while biting her lower lip and subtly pressing her legs together, he touched his palms, feeling her soft breasts and almost moaning at the soft sensation.

Little by little he moved his hands while looking at her with a very serious look, and with the tips of his thin fingers he began to massage her erect nipples with increasing dedication, observing the responses her body gave him. Every soft tremor, every subtle gasp, every press and rub of her thighs against each other.

-They're perfect. - He praised softly as he stimulated them, eliciting a soft moan from Y/n who bent down even more offering her own breasts to Aemond.

She was lost in his touches, so gentle yet so demanding. No one had ever given her so much pleasure just by touching her breasts, and Y/n wanted to moan with pleasure but was holding herself back so as not to seem so given. She pressed her eyes tightly, feeling the shocks of pleasure running through her body and going straight down to her completely soaked pussy.

Suddenly, with her eyes still closed, Y/n felt Aemond's warm breath close to her skin, and opened her eyes at the same moment, looking at him.

-What are you doing? - She gasped, looking directly into that blue eye that had left her fascinated since the first time she saw it and that now looking so closely she thought it contained some violet reflections.

-I said I wanted to touch, you didn't specify just using of hands. - He murmured dirtyly, lowering his mouth over Y/n's breasts and sucking deeply on her excited nipple, which curved her back against the couch, finally moaning loudly in pure contentment.

-Oh Aemond please more. - She whimpered, writhing and pressing her thighs together. - So good... so good.

From that moment on, it was impossible for her to contain her own moans, his mouth felt so incredible against her already sensitive nipples. With each suction she trembled and tightened her thighs while gripping the sofa tightly, almost digging her nails into the upholstery.

-By the gods, you have the tastiest tits I've ever tasted in my life. - Aemond moaned between the hungry sucks and firm, desperate caresses, sending a new wave of pleasure over her as she heard those words. And without control over her own body, Y/n put her hands in Aemond's hair, tangling her fingers there and holding her head against herself as she moaned his name in despair.

Her pulling on his hair did something almost wild to Aemond, he usually didn't like it when people pulled his hair, but at that moment… Fuck, it really felt good. And when she started moaning his name in a completely lacking way while rubbing her pussy on the couch like a desperate bitch in heat, he felt himself on the edge.

While he sucked and licked her left nipple, caressing the right one with his hand, drawing waves and waves of pleasure from her, he guided his vacant hand inside the gray sweatpants he was wearing and finally paid attention to his cock, which was leaking and making a mess against the fabric of his boxers.

He violently fucked his cock against the left hand while still inside his pants while inevitably moaning against Y/n's nipple, making her rub even harder against the sofa.

-Aemond. - Came Y/n's broken voice in a moan that was almost a whimper as she shuddered without control over her own body, writhing on the couch, feeling the unbridled pleasure of the orgasm taking over her.

And hearing her beg for his name as she writhed in the midst of orgasm, Aemond reached his own peak of pleasure, spurting against his own hand in thick, strong jets, moaning with contentment against Y/n's sensitive, reddened nipples.

The two remained motionless for a few moments, just trying to regain their senses completely taken over by the debilitating pleasure. Y/n's mind went completely blank as she laid her head on the back of the sofa, still panting, completely shocked since she had never cum just by stimulating her nipples. And Aemond, in turn, tried to regain his composure with his head still buried between his classmate's delicious breasts.

And when he finally raised his head, he couldn't resist the temptation to suck her nipple once more, making her gasp with overstimulation.

-Oh, Aemond. - She sighed complainingly, lightly pushing his head away with the palm of her right hand. - They're sensitive.

-Mmmm. - He murmured caressing her naked waist. -I could suck your tits for hours if you let me.

-I could let you. - She gasped, pretending to be uncertain about the subject even though she was still sensitive to his touch, feeling the inside of her thighs tingling amid the scandalous moisture in her panties.

-Well, it's 30 pages. - He shrugged, moving his caresses up and down her waist. - And as far as I know, the pairs that Hayford assigned are until the end of the semester.

-We'll have plenty of time. - He kissed her nipple once more, making her sigh.

[hibiscuslovecandles]

✿MY LOVE✿| BSD

Genre:Fluff,parenting,crack,GN!READER Warnings:Children,babies,not proofread,may be ooc,Let me know if there's any warning I missed! Featuring:Chuuya Nakahara, Edgar Allan Poe, Gin Akutagawa, Doppo Kunikida Note:My next headcanon post after this might come out pretty damn late, I've been a neet for 3 years and I'm being forced to get a job and get a drivers permit so it'll take awhile

🍷When you mentioned wanting to have kids while the two of you were watching a movie together cuddled up on the couch together while drinking wine nearly made him choke on his wine. You two had a good hour long conversation on the topic of kids.

🍷After waiting some time for Chuuya to be mentally prepared for the responsibilities that come with being a parent, he brought up the topic again. That's how you ended up becoming parents.

🍷When they were still a baby it was common to see Chuuya sitting on the playmat with them humoring the infants nonsense and making sure they didn't swallow anything that could kill them.

🍷Whenever the baby would cry in the middle of the night Chuuya always would insist that you stay in bed while he goes to check. 20 minutes would pass and you'd see Chuuya in the rocking chair of the nursery, baby in his arms, fast asleep.

🍷Will take so much pride if the baby says their first words in his presence. It doesn't need to be dada or anything any word and he has the most stupid smile you've ever seen on his face.

🍷Makes sure you and the baby are safe at all costs, the apartment is COMPLETELY baby proof, Chuuya is even mildly offended if you say he's doing too much.

🍷You don't know that Chuuya has a entire folder on his phone dedicated to you and the baby, you don't that these photos were even taken since they were all taken when you preoccupied with the baby like when you're giving them a bath or you building a sand castle with them at the beach, of course he has photos of the two most important people in his life.

🍷Chuuya was sadly….out on business when they took their first steps, when you two video called that night per routine you told him and Chuuya felt like shit for not being there for it….then there was the baby hitting the screen of your phone not quite understanding why Chuuya is inside a rectangle.

🍷When Chuuya returned the first thing he needed was to see his baby and when you placed the baby on the ground and he saw his baby waddle towards him, he wanted to cry, but he didn't it just holding his baby once they reached him.

🍷You are required to send him photos whenever you and the baby are doing something and he can't be there. Send him that photo of the baby on the swing set, send him the photo of the baby flipping through those baby books, send it!!!

🍷He has photos of all three of you together in his wallet. There's nothing he loves more.

🍷Was originally strongly against diaper duty but now takes it upon himself to do it.

🍷Reads all the ingredients used on the back of the baby food and makes sure nothing in the baby bottles you guys buy has any remotely harmful chemicals. He can't lose this one thing.

🍷And a baby grows into a child.

🍷Whenever he's scolding your child for doing something bad and he gets too frustrated he'll have you take the reigns since he wants to avoid taking his anger out on his child.

🍷Chuuya might not be around often due to his uh…position at work but once his kid starts developing interests he keeps those intact. His child into animals? Taking them to the zoo next week. His kid into sports? Signing them up for baseball as soon as possible.

🍷Whenever Chuuya feels like he missed out on something due to work he'll lay next to you in bed and ask you if he's a bad dad while just looking at the ceiling.

🍷Chuuya is the dad that his kid has no memory of ever seeing him cry when they get older. Mostly because he only really cries by himself and occasionally in your arms in bed.

🍷Has scared off multiple people he thinks were getting too close to his kid.

🍷You have a photo of a completely unbothered Chuuya sitting on the couch reading as your kid is practically climbing him with their blanket as a make shift cape.

🍷Chuuya is always there for whenever you need some you time and just need a break and is completely understanding. He'll take you out for a nice relaxing night out as a close friend of yours watches over your kid granted Chuuya was very hesitant to leave your kid. Not a single hair on their head will be hurt without someone dying.

🍷Whenever your kid comes home from school having a bad day they know they can tell Chuuya as he will hold them close and rub their back and whisper reassuring words as he listens.

🍷When the two of you got called by the school only you could go and pick up your kid since Chuuya was busy doing stuff. Your child got into a fight on the playground is what you told Chuuya when you got home and seeing him washing his hands of…stuff in the kitchen sink, Chuuya was proud of his kid, not for fighting that's bad, but for winning said fight.

🍷 “Did they win?”

🍷 “Not the point Chuuya.”

🍷 “I know but-”

🍷Will sit down and talk to them as to why fighting is wrong and why they shouldn't do it unless absolutely necessary his job doesn't count.

🍷Always tries his best to get your kid the best gift on their birthday. It's like a competition for you two just without any stakes.

🍷Chuuya puts your kid into private school for their entire life, only wanting the very best for your kid.

🍷You could be busy sitting with your kid helping them with their math homework at the dining table and you'll suddenly feel a pair of lips on your cheek. Chuuya returning from a uh…business trip earlier than expected and surprising the both of you!

🍷Chuuya will take a mental photo whenever he sees you and your child sleeping because your child was scared of the thunderstorm outside and wanted to sleep with you two. Seeing the way your child is curled up into your chest and you snoring away is a sight he'll cherish. He loves you two so much.

🦝When you mentioned kids to Poe you had to catch him when he fainted…..it took him quite awhile to warm up to the idea of kids mostly because he's worries if he'll be a good father, he was on board with kids after alot of time but you didn't mind, kids are alot of work and fragile so of course he's hesitant.

🦝The way it was brought up was when he cooking dinner and you were just getting home from work, he had been building up the courage all day so when he heard that front door open he yelled from the kitchen that he was ready for kids…you hadn't even taken off your shoes yet, when you entered the kitchen and asked him to repeat himself because what the fuck was that he was so embarrassed from how he mentioned the topic back up that he refused to even look at you.

🦝Poe had to be taught by you on how to hold a baby and when he looked down into his arms and he saw the warm, squishy, soft, mini human in the fluffy blanket he let out tears of joy, you couldn't really tell though since how hysterically he was crying.

🦝Despite him originally being WAY more opposed to having kids than you were he knows way more about babies than you, having read only the finest books on babies and honestly might mansplain at you about your baby.

🦝Should you leave your baby with a racoon?probably not but when you and Poe both are trying to figure out what's wrong with the bathroom sink there's Karl in the doorway giving your baby a bottle. You're so glad you got a picture of that.

🦝The first time Ranpo came face to face with your baby was when he was going to leech off you two again by crashing at your guy's place and when Poe opened the door he immediately noticed the baby crying in your arms trying to calm them down. Ranpo pushed past Poe just to poke. Poke at your baby and they stopped???

🦝Poe goes to those mommy support groups and it's honestly surreal to see him at the park with all his mom friends talking about their pediatricians.

🦝Whenever Poe makes a mistake like being too loud infront of the baby it keeps him up at night and him muttering about how your baby is going to cut him off as soon as possible and you have to put a stop to this thinking.

🦝Has a photo album dedicated to your baby's growth.

🦝Despite them being a baby and not being able to understand what's being said to them yet Poe reads them bed time stories.

🦝You were playing in the snow with your baby while Poe was inside working on his novel when they said their first words and you rushed inside, baby in arms, to get them repeat their words to Poe and when they do Poe snatched them from your arms and showered their face in so many kisses.

🦝The two of you turned your back from the baby for two seconds while adding a new wall decoration to the nursery when you guys hear Karl make a ear piercing squeal and when you two whipped around the last thing you two expected to see was your baby standing on Karl's tail- wait what. The moment was quickly over when your baby fell back on their bum and cried from how loud Karl was. The two of you were so happy for their first steps less happy about all the yelling but this'll be a fond memory in the future.

🦝Babyhood to childhood.

🦝Hes kind of a push over, if his child begs enough he will buy them whatever they want its usually up to you or Karl to slap some sense into him Karl in a more literal sense to make sure they don't grow up spoiled.

🦝Ranpo ends up being the uncle to sneak candy or a dollar to your kid whenever he sees them to which you scold him and your child. Considering how often Ranpo freeloads off you and Poe he might as well be another child.

🦝Poe is still in contact with the moms from his mom-baby classes and takes your child to play dates with the other moms children.

🦝On his desk are photos of your child on their birthday and a photo of you and him on your wedding day.

🦝Ranpo and Karl are a surprisingly good babysitting duo whenever you and Poe just want a night to yourselves because believe it or not having to make sure a fun sized human with the survival skills of a cabbage doesn't die can be stressful though you and Poe never find out all the hijinks that happen on those nights cause Ranpo bribes your kid to not say anything about the three of them getting lost in a city one hour from your home.

🦝He reads as many books and observes how you handle things whenever it comes to having to disciplining your child so that he can feel like a actually good parent, he looks up to you so much you don't even know.

🦝He still showers your child's face with kisses even if they do start getting embarrassed by it.

🦝He has taken it upon himself to homeschool your child, changing his schedule for his child, being very hands on like taking your kid outside for science lessons :)

🦝One time when Poe was busy writing he walked out his office to see you covered in scratches, you got them when you tried to get Karl to match clothes with your kid. Poe tended to your scratches.

🦝The horror that appeared on both your faces when you two noticed your child was in the bathroom for a weird amount of time so you guys went to check and they were cutting their own hair. Rest of their childhood from then on they had short hair.

🦝Multiple bags filled with clothes that your kid has grown out of that Poe refuses to get rid. Just reminds him of how tiny they used to be.

🦝Poe got into the habit of eating baby food when your kid was still a baby and only recently has stopped.

🦝Immediately hugged your child when they fell off their bike for the first time while learning.

🦝Poe likes answering questions about basic things that your child asks like why is the fridge light only on when you open it? Why can't he play right now? He just finds these questions about simple things that any adult understands amusing.

🦝Poe's heart gets all mushy whenever he sees you tucking your child in. He has it all.

🔪When you mentioned children to Gin while the two of you were making dinner together she froze in place, tears began to poke out of her eyes and it wasn't because of the onions she was cutting, she needed space and time to think it over and so you stepped back.

🔪You were suprised when months after you initially asked the question she gave a answer to your question while the two of you were on a ice skating date. You completely forgot about it so when she told you she thinks ready you were really confused. You aren't confused anymore now that you two are parents.

🔪You'll come home to a eerily silent house and just witness Gin sitting on the living room floor just watching your baby.

🔪Gin triple checks to make sure the car seat is secure before driving.

🔪Ryuunosuke has affections for your baby, after all their family and will protect them with his life, but has he ever supported the weight of the baby in his own two arms? Absolutely not. The closest he's got to holding them was using rashomon to take them when you forcibly handed the baby to him while you scrambled to turn the stove off after you realized you left it on and even them he put the baby on the ground next to him immediately.

🔪She is aware that the nature of her job might prevent her from spending time with you two so she always tries to keep things as snappy and clean as possible so she can make it home in time for dinner.

🔪Whenever you tired after taking care of the baby she'll gladly run you a nice bath and wash your back for you.

🔪You two have a entire manual prepared just in case you guys have to leave your baby with Ryuunosuke.

🔪Gin is very hesitant to give the baby any sugar but does feed them sugar every once in awhile for good behavior due to you convincing her.

🔪She gushes over your baby's first words, you were coming back from hanging out with friends and see her gently pinching your baby's cheeks and you don't even get to ask what's up when the baby repeats the word again.

🔪Prides herself in being the best mother ever.

🔪The baby was sleeping in bed with the two of you once and cried seeing Gin sleep with her eyes open. Fun memory years later, Not fun in the moment.

🔪You have a photo of her sleeping on the couch with the baby sleeping in the position as her under her arm, she'll never know you have this photo.

🔪A baby eventually turns into a child.

🔪Gin is the one who styles the kid’s hair.

🔪Has a photo of your kid on the first day of school as her lockscreen.

🔪Your kid is in public school, Gin just wants your kid to have a normal average average childhood.

🔪Takes everything her kid says very seriously, the kid could be talking about the most recent episode of their favorite show and she'll be listening intently.

🔪Please give her a head massage at the end of the day she deserves it considering her job and the kid.

🔪Whenever your kid does something bad Gin calmly sits down and explains why what the did was bad and why they shouldn't do it again ignore her job details .

🔪Your child's playdates just make Gin happy to see her child enjoy something she never did.

🔪If she gets home earlier than expected she'll help your kid with their homework.

🔪Your child has most definitely said “Eewwwww!” seeing you two slow dance together

🔪No one knows about you or your kid's existence. She stays private about it and wants to keep you two safe.

📒He was the one to mention kids to you when the two of you were getting ready for bed, he's financially and mentally ready to have a child are you? He handled the conversation with you with much care and if you ever got overwhelmed during the conversation he'd help calm you down.

📒Kunikida made sure to spend days talking about this subject with you since having a child is a life altering event. And now the life altering event is here.

📒He does those little baby leg exercises every morning before work so that your baby has enough leg strength for when they start walking.

📒Kunikida is not embarrassed to wear a baby carrier.

📒You were caught having one of the babies snacks and Kunikida snatched it away saying it was for the baby not you!

📒Doesn't mention you or the baby unless someone asks and when they do he talk about the two of you with so much pride.

📒When the day with the baby was particularly exhausting Kunikida will cup your face and tell you that you're doing a amazing job and only shower you with praise about how he admires your strength.

📒Kunikida and you were at the park having a picnic as a date together when you got a call from the family member that was baby sitting for the two of you that your baby took their first steps. Kunikida wanted to immediately get up and go see for himself but he didn't, this day was about you two celebrating your anniversary. When you guys went to pick up the baby though Kunikida cried on his knees when he saw the baby stumble on over to you two.

📒You were sitting on the bathroom sink recording Kunikida giving your baby a bath when they decided to say their first words, a shock to the both of you since they were months late to say their first words so the two of you just froze. Then you realized you got it on video and told Kunikida… he just smiled and gave your baby a kiss on the forehead and kept bathing them. This video is cherished.

📒You have all the gifts that Kunikida’s co-workers gave you guys on a shelf, some of them missed the assignment but it's the thought that counts though the crotchet stuffed cat by his co worker ‘Junichiro’ has to your favorite out the bunch.

📒You'll wake up in the middle of the night and realize Kunikida isn't there. Everytime you'll walk into the nursery and see him with the baby having fell asleep in the rocking chair.

📒Kunikida knows that his job requires him to do something life threatening things so he records his voice, talking about anything and everything talking about his schedule, how much he loves you and the baby, his time at work, just incase he doesn't end up coming home.

📒Luckily he made it to your babies childhood he still has voice messages just incase.

📒Instead of tying his kids shoes for them he decided to turn it into a lesson and teach then how to tie their own shoes.

📒Playdates are always held at your home because the other parents no for a fact that their kids are safe.

📒When your kid scraped their knee when they tripped over the pavement Kunikida was the first person on the scene.

📒You have a framed photo of your kid messily braiding Kunikida’s hair.

📒Might embarrass the kid but he doesn't care, his kid is required to bundle up as much as possible during winter.

📒Raising kid can be exhausting, he gets it, so. While your kid is being watched over at a family members house he takes the two of you to a nice planetarium date.

📒Your kid will activately be saying “Gross!” While you cover them in kisses.

📒Kunikida will take off his glasses for 000.1 seconds he'll look back and your kid took them.

📒Your kid cleans their own room and washes their own dishes.

📒…Good chance your kid had to help Ranpo get on the train before.

📒From the way you and your kid walk into the grocery store with blacked out sunglasses they probably thought you two were about to raid the place when in reality your kid just wanted to feel cool while getting their favorite snack.

📒Your kid always feels loved because every night before they close their eyes they see you and Kunikida telling them goodnight before the lights are out.

📒You feel loved. Kunikida doesn't fall asleep until he knows you two are asleep, just a safety thing.

Smoking and drinking beer with If I Die Young by The Band Perry while posting this lol

[w4w4lycsss]

HE'S LIKE A POEM | PERCY JACKSON

summary: You are a very dry person when it comes to showing feelings but somehow you manage to express all the love that exists between you and the PDA boy (Percy) pairing: Percy Jackson x Hypnos!male!reader « now playing . . . so american, olivia rodrigo↬ ♡ »

[ ... ]

'Dress up and make yourself look attractive, keep quiet. Even if you have to act silly.' It's what you've heard so much coming from your mother for years and years, now more than you have a boyfriend. It has always been difficult for you to express your emotions, or just your expressions; Your face has always been a blank canvas that you have wanted to paint yourself, but due to pressure you only limit yourself to observing everything from tired eyes and a neutral almost sarcastic expression.

Everything changed when you met Percy, that loud and so affectionate boy that he made you nauseous, you never knew why he agreed to be your friend or how he fell in love with you, you never expressed anything different towards him than how you behaved with others. Or so you thought.

It was one night when you realized it; you two were sitting on the roof of your cabin watching the stars, he was exhausted from talking up to his elbows and leaned back on your shoulder to rest his eyes, 'curiosity killed the cat' and with your powers of a son of Hypnos you slept Percy without him noticing. You entered his head, you could see how he dreamed of you quite often, you saw only the superficial, you were even afraid to investigate the head of a fifteen-year-old teenage man.

You came out of his dream, you didn't know what to say or what to do, for you everything was too fast, for the first time you felt that you were making a genuine expression and not just being bored, you realized that Percy could do that. You took a deep breath and went back into his head, no matter how afraid you were of yourself. He had an insecurity: he didn't know anything about you.

It was all a lie, Percy knew every detail about you, he knew how to read your non-existent expressions, your tone of voice, your body language and your sarcasm. He knew what you liked and what you didn't, what made you angry and what made you happy, your favorite food, your favorite place at camp, your bedtimes, and your problems with your mother. Percy Jackson was simply the perfect man for you because he knew you from head to toe and from the inside out.

You left his head for the second time and proposed something; be more expressive. Maybe because of him but deep inside you would like people to understand you, not just one person. By the next morning you had written about four poems, drawn three drawings, and written seven letters. Even if you wanted to send them all at once, you knew that one wrong step and you would lose the right guy. You were going to start slow.

Four months had passed since the meeting on the roof and two since you had been sending letters, drawings and poems. Nothing anonymous. You pretend not to know what Percy is talking about when he asks you about all 'that', and you keep sending it.

The nerves consume you little by little until it becomes too much, you were going to end this and send the last letter to find out if he wanted a serious relationship like you had been idealizing.

"I apologize if it's a little too much, just a little too soon But if the conversation ever were to come up I don't wanna assume this stuff But ain't it love? Think I'm in love."

When you started a relationship, he noticed your attempts and efforts to show that you loved him, and he was also very good at showing it. It was like PDA ran through his blood, he couldn't get enough of it. His dedication was to read and read everything you gave him, no matter how dyslexic he was.

[sylusjinwoon]

{ 149 }

wingmen.

megumi fushiguro x fem.reader

no curses | high school au

warnings: slight crack, but mostly fluff.

dedicated to @xbarrjallenx

to my beloved girl,

you are all that i can think of. from your bright eyes, to the way your hair seems to shine from beneath the sunlight-

you drive me crazy.

i am madly in love with you.

please say that you’ll be mine someday?

-yours truly,

your admirer.

{ … }

your lips were parted with absolute shock in response to reading the love letter that was left within your locker. your mind was in a haze as you kept reading the neat script over and over again.

in fact, you were still in shock because you didn’t think that something so sweet could even happen to you!

you recall waking up this morning feeling stressed and nervous about your upcoming trigonometry exam. even with your best friend’s meticulous and detailed notes, you ended up goofing off with nobara and yuji and didn't do much studying (much to megumi's chagrin!)

you had plans of going over your notes with megumi during homeroom, but after receiving such a sweet love letter, your desires to study went down the drain. your eyes kept trailing over each written word, but couldn't seem to recognize the style of writing at all.

as your fingertips trace at the written words, you suddenly had a epiphany-

perhaps your friends could help you figure out just who this secret admirer was!

with your eye practically glimmering with hope, you slam your locker shut before making a mad dash to your classroom, almost too eager to see megumi, yuji, and nobara again.

{ ... }

megumi was simply looking over his notes when he sees you bursting into the classroom. your features appear flustered, and he could see the way your strands of hair fell across your face.

he feels his lips twitch in a slight smile, but successfully fights back those happy emotions because it just wasn't in his style to be anything but cool, calm, and collected while in the presence of his friends-

(even if he did have the tiniest crush on you-)

but he digresses.

while yuji and nobara were talking about some new music video that was dropped by their favorite band, you take quick strides to them while holding up what looked like a letter from within your hands.

"guys look! someone sent me a love letter!"

upon hearing your outburst, yuji and nobara stopped talking about the new music release and turn their attention to you.

"whoa! that's so cool! do you know who wrote it?"

"this is actually sooooo sweet!"

megumi frowns upon hearing how overly happy and excited yuji and nobara were, which was what made the warning bells go off within his head. standing from his seat, he closes his notebook and goes to where you were all huddled together.

megumi narrows his emerald green gaze down at nobara, seeing a suspiciously familiar piece of stationary. he was itching to see just what this letter was all about when he snatches it away from nobara's hands.

"h-hey! i was still reading that!"

but he ignores nobara's protests, scanning through each written word as his forehead began to pulse with annoyance.

this was nobara's handwriting when she actually tried to write neatly!

just what were these clowns up to?

"come with me." megumi returns the letter to you and picks up yuji and nobara by the back of their uniforms, leaving you alone as you went back to staring dreamily at your love letter.

hearing both of his friends laughing while dragging them out into the hallways was more than enough proof that they had done something. only when he knew he was away from you did he finally begin speaking.

"what the hell are you guys up to?" megumi hisses at them both, feeling the annoyance grow when they casually look away from him. "i know that letter was written by you, nobara. so spill, what's going on?"

"i'm just trying to be your wingman." she tells him with a wink, all while smirking at him. "because yuji and i both know that you don't have the balls to tell her yourself."

his face began to turn hotter in response, nearly being choked with embarrassment as he pointed an accusing finger at her, "it's none of your business! if i want to confess to her, then i'll do it on my own terms!"

"yeah, surrre, you've been saying that since the end of our middle school year... and we're in our second year of high school now." yuji reminds megumi with a snicker.

"haha, yeah, yuji knows what's up! so that's why, we're gonna keep sending your beloved letters until you actually confess!"

"no, you won't-"

nobara then flashes him a sly smile, "did you not see how happy she looked after receiving that letter? she would be utterly devastated if we stopped... or maybe... even more hurt if you don't write the letters yourself."

megumi freezes, thinking back on to the joy that paints your features and how excited you were to have such a letter. in fact, seeing your sweet smile was enough to make his heart clench in response...

perhaps the reason why he was so angry and annoyed was because his friends had managed to make you smile first-

not him.

megumi moves away from them with a click of his tongue, shoving a hand within the pocket of his pants, "fine. you got me. just... don't send her anymore letters, okay? i'll come clean to her soon."

while megumi kept his back turned, he couldn't help but smirk when he hears yuji and nobara high-fiving each other, knowing that their plan was a success.

{ ... }

at the end of the school day, (when you were sure you, yuji, and nobara had failed that trig exam), you drag your feet across the linoleum floors of your school, switching out your slippers with your actual shoes when you saw a folded note fall out of your shoe cubby.

your eyes go wide when you received yet another letter, but this time, it wasn't written on a cute stationary, or even placed in an envelope.

instead, it was a folded piece of what looked like a torn page from a notebook. feeling intrigued, you unfold the note as it read.

hey, i wanted to apologize to you, since the letter you received this morning wasn't from me-

but it was written on my behalf.

those words were really cheesy, and there's no way in hell i'd ever say such things-

but that doesn't mean that my heart doesn't race for you;

it doesn't mean that i don't find you beautiful, or think about you all the time.

if you want to know who i really am, come meet me at the school's rooftop.

i'll be waiting.

-your admirer

your heart begins to race, because this handwriting was one that you actually recognized-

for you had seen such neat writing while copying and reading over a certain sea urchin head's notes.

with your heart pounding from within the confines of your chest, you immediately push your legs forward, allowing your footsteps to echo across the floors. you ignore the burning felt against your feet as you saw the door leading to the rooftop, pushing it open with the entirety of your weight.

your chest heaves with each breath that escapes from your parted lips, eyes now narrowing with a fondness when you see megumi standing several feet away from you.

his expression was shy, with his hand running across his hair as he waits for you. allowing the door to shut from behind you, you step closer to megumi and smile up at him. you don't say a word, allowing him to speak first. your eyes meet with his tranquil gaze, basking in his sighs when he says.

"nobara was meddling again... she was the one who wrote that note and put it in your locker."

you let his admission soak in before nodding, "...and...what prompted her to do such a thing?"

megumi remains silent for several seconds before admitting, "it was because of my own hesitance."

he frames at your face with his two hands then, making your face heat up in response as you were forced to look up at him. with eyes filled with adoration for you, and you feel megumi press the pad of his thumb against your bottom lip before telling you, "but, i won't hesitate anymore..."

leaning closer to you, you allow your eyes to shut in response when his lips finally met with yours in a kiss that you had been waiting for since the moment you first laid eyes on him...

a.n. - ahhh finally wrote another story for the best boy! i had a lot of fun writing this story, even if it's feels like it's been forever since i wrote for megumi 🥹 i hope you readers still enjoy it!

all stories are written by rei; reposts, translations, and plagiarism are not allowed.

[hannieehaee]

Hello!!! Long time reader here 🫣🫣 I was wondering if I could request a little svt scenario :>?? Could it be where you're struggling with opening a jar or smt and so you ask them for help but while they're struggling to open it as well, their hand or arm slips and accidentally hits you. I'm curious what their reaction would be. (Recently happened with my guy friend and the poor guy freaked out apologizing 😭)

being unable to open a jar and wacking you in the process

content: gender neutral, reader is implied to be physically weaker than the member, height difference implied in dk's, accidental hitting (its implied to be an accidental light smack on the cheek/chest area; no actual harm is done)

wc: 1720

a/n: this is so silly help 😭 thank u so much for reading my work and for requesting! <3

masterlist

seungcheol -

seungcheol is a proud man. he's very proud of his strength and loves to show it off, which is why he secretly adores whenever you ask him for anything that requires him to show off his ripped physique to you. if you ever need help with a jar, he's got you! or so he thought. if he ever attempted to open a jar for you but failed at it, he'd be a little embarrassed, but that would not compare to his look of absolute mortification at accidentally hurting you in the process, not having realized his arm would slip off the container as he failed at opening it. the next twenty minutes would be spent with him apologizing over and over, not knowing whether to focus on the pain he inflicted or the embarrassment he's feeling.

jeonghan -

he'd wonder why you're asking him of all people. he's not known for being necessarily strong, so he's not sure why you'd seek him. yeah, he's the boyfriend and all but he never signed up for jar-opening duties. bug killing? maybe. driving? he's your guy. but opening jars? he usually seeks seungcheol or mingyu for that. but since he's jeonghan, he'd say yes to whatever you asked him without much complaint. however, you shouldnt have been surprised when the end result was a still-closed jar and a red cheek. yours. your red cheek, as jeonghan's hand had slipped and caught your cheek in the process. he'd find the situation ironic, thinking that maybe you'd kind of asked for this .. but he would not actually voice that thought and instead would baby you until you whined at him to stop, insisting it didnt hurt that much.

joshua -

he's used to opening jars for you, enjoying the way you usually swoon over the swollen muscle he occasionally likes to show off to you. this happens quite often actually. he's half sure you don't even attempt to open them yourself, just immediately handing them over to him as if he had a built-in command dedicated to opening jars. which he kind of did in a sense. the one off time he'd fail at opening a jar and hurt you in the process would cause him to widen his eyes in terror, thinking he mightve really hurt you. until you started laughing (at his reaction mostly), causing him to whine at you and tell you to do it yourself!

jun -

he'd do anything you asked without question. he's opened millions of jars for you at this point. he doesnt even think about it as he does it, its just an automatic reaction by now. and thus far, he's never met a jar that has overpowered him. until now. this very moment in which he found himself struggling. but he would not be defeated by a jar right in front of the love of his life. who would be defeated, however, would be you, the receiver of a smack right across the face, courtesy of jun's elbow. like most other members, he'd immediately drop the jar and tend to you, cursing at the jar in chinese for causing him to lay hand on you.

soonyoung -

he never outwardly shows off his strength to you, but enjoys things such as opening jars because they allow him to reestablish his rightful role as boyfriend. whats a boyfriend for if not for opening jars for their significant other? on the rare occasion he's unable to open a jar for you, he would refuse to give up, roaring at the challenge (yes, roaring, like a tiger) and putting even more strength into it. this would prove fruitless the moment his hand slipped from the jar's cap, leading his elbow to land straight against your chest, making you yelp. depending on his mood that day, he'd either grow sheepish and beg for forgiveness, or simply laugh as he rubbed at the red area in which his elbow landed, kissing it better. silly guy.

wonwoo -

another one of the strong boys™️. he's used to helping you out with any heavy lifting (literally and metaphorically). enjoys the domesticity behind opening jars for you. it makes him feel needed. its nice. except when things like this happen. if he were ever to accidentally hurt you in the process of helping you open a jar he'd be mortified. he wouldn't verbally react, he would just kind of look at you with wide eyes and an open mouth, not saying much. you'd complain at him wondering why he's just frozen in place, which would cause him to snap out of it and caress whichever part of you he had made contact with. he'd chuckle at the ridiculousness of it but still be very apologetic.

jihoon -

he wont admit to it but he loooves feeling needed. even if its for something as little as opening a measly jar. he also loves doing anything that requires strength when you're around. he's noticed the way you eye his arms. and he enjoys it. a lot. what he didnt enjoy, however, was failing at such an easy task. what he enjoyed even less was his hand slipping and landing against your nose, pulling a whimper out of you. neither of you would know how to react for a second. until jihoon started to apologize profusely, swearing to you that it was an accident and that he'd stay away from jars from now on.

seokmin -

cutie pie loves doing these silly little domestic favours for you. getting you a spoon while you're laying on the couch, too lay to get one? he's on his way! handing you a bowl from a cupboard you cant reach? you dont even have to ask! opening a jar for you? he's your guy! well, maybe not always. like today, when he'd angled himself wrong while opening you a jar of pickles, causing his elbow to hit against your chest. the impact alarmed seokmin immediately, causing him to stop what he was doing and coddle you, apologizing with all his might as he rubbed and blew at the area as if he'd caused any real damage.

mingyu -

he's been on jar-opening duty since he was a trainee. this isnt new to him. you dont even need to ask. the moment he sees you in possession of a jar, he's nonchalantly taking it from your hands and opening it without a word. the one time his distracted manner backfired had been today. he'd grabbed it from your arms, attempting to open it without realizing it was humid due to having been recently taken out from the freezer. his hand immediately slipped and landed against your eye, causing you to yelp. mingyu, being mingyu, would dramatically drop everything (literally would drop the damn jar, which was luckily made of plastic and not glass ..) and tend to you, acting as if he'd accidentally sliced your face open. he'd need convincing to calm down.

minghao -

it was a simple task, but he enjoyed the domesticity of it. he liked how you would seek him out specifically. what was he here for, if not to help his loved one out with these types of little things around the house? he'd chuckle a bit at your sheepish way of asking, fearing you were bothering him by interrupting whatever he was doing just to open a measly jar. but he wouldnt mind, proceeding to attempt at opening it. it usually would end here, except this time. as soon as he felt his hand make contact with your cheek, he'd stop dead on his tracks, embarrassed at having hurt you. he'd coo over you and rub your cheek as he apologized, claiming this was a one time thing and he'd be more careful next time.

seungkwan -

living with jeonghan, he's used to opening the jars on his own. believe it or not, seungkwan is actually very strong! so he would always insist in opening jars and such for you around the house. you didnt even have to ask, he'd do it on his own, wanting to show you what a good boyfriend he made. but well, kwan wasnt that strong after all, as he'd struggle with jars himself sometimes. but being the stubborn boy he is, he'd still insist, even after accidentally wacking you across the forehead with his hand after it slipped from the lid. being the dramatic boy he is, he'd curse the jar before coddling you endlessly and cooing at any pain he may have caused.

vernon -

he'd help you out with random household necessities very nonchalantly. he's not much a homemaker, leading you to take care of most things around your home. it was fine, though, because he would help you out whenever you asked. you wouldnt even really have to tell him what you needed, as he'd know from habit. if you neared him with a jar in hand, he'd already know to put his phone down for a moment and open it for you. if he struggled with it, he'd put a bit more attention and effort to it, but that would only lead to his hand slipping from the lid. without realizing, his hand would land on your nose, making you yelp a bit. he wouldnt go crazy with the apologies, but would feel a little flustered and say something along the lines of 'shit. sorry, babe' and offer a hug as an apology.

chan -

you asking him help to open up a jar would make him feel dependable. being the youngest in his group, he tended to feel like he depended on others a lot rather than the other way around. you were a nice change of pace. if the jar was too tight for him to open, he'd grow a little sheepish, his ears maybe turning a little red. whats with this jar?! but no jar could beat the prowess of lee chan. he wasnt about to let a measly jar embarrass him in front of his s/o. but what he would let happen, apparently, was for his hand to slip and land swiftly against your chin. in this situation, he'd immediately drop the jar and baby you as he coo'd at your reddened chin, scolding himself for being so careless.

[heeliumhaze-elle]

close friends

「synopsis」 — after running into her extremely toxic ex at jake's birthday party last year, y/n seemed to disappear off the face of the planet. the only traces of her were her instagram story posts during her month-long trip to the states at the start of the new year. but other than that, no one had seen or heard from her since that night in november. the boys have speculated that it was because of the run-in with k all those months ago; however, when something y/n posts on her 'close friends' story begins to circulate through their group, they grow increasingly suspicious and angry over their speculations. ... except something about all of this doesn't sit right with heeseung. 「warnings」 — mc suffers from depression & struggles with thoughts of suicide, the boys are kinda petty assholes imo, cursing. please dm me if i missed anything! 「word count」 — 4923 words 「author's note」 — lowercase intended. only slightly proofread. no real plot, rushed ending - like seriously i didn't know how to end it so i just did... this is my first story, so i'm really nervous, lol. this is all fictional. the way the idols are portrayed in this story does not reflect how i view them by any means. 「dedication」 — this story is dedicated to my friend ani - may you always remember that you are never alone, not anymore.

"can you fucking believe her?" asked sunghoon, staring at the screenshot on jungwon's phone.

jake and jay agreed, peering over sunghoon's shoulder to get a better look at the photo. sunoo, who sat opposite the 02z, let out a tired sigh while ni-ki, who sat on the tabletop between jake and sunoo, massaged his temples. meanwhile, jungwon looked at his hyungs uneasily. heeseung wondered if he regretted asking if y/n was okay.

heeseung kept his gaze fixed on his friends as they continued to skim through the now-infamous screenshot.

"literally though, like what the fuck are we then?" ni-ki asked. "how dare she."

"god, no! and then to re-add us to her 'close friends' as if nothing happened," jay added. "like jungwon wouldn't have said anything to us."

"right?" sunoo said, rolling his eyes as he read through the post. "as if he wasn't going to tell us! like hello? he's our best friend!"

"it's like it was about us," jake said. "i'm not here to play these games. if she has a fucking problem with us, she needs to just fucking say so. we're not in high school anymore!"

"... well, except ni-ki," muttered sunoo.

jungwon let out a nervous sigh. "guys, i didn't mean to start anything-."

"no!" jay interrupted. "jake's right. we're all old enough. she needs to use her fucking words. she has a problem with us, just fucking say so. don't fucking act like we're all 'good' when it's clearly about us."

"because what the hell did we ever do to her?" sunghoon demanded.

all the while, jungwon's phone was making its rounds to each of the boys. and soon, the phone was in heeseung's hands. he was finally able to read the screenshot that started this entire uproar.

... and he was gutted.

"my sleep schedule is so fucked as of lately. all i do is lay in bed for 85-90% of my day. i can't keep pretending i'm jet-lagged from my trip to the states. i desperately crave to get out of the house to do things with other people, but i literally have no friends here — outside the ones that i made at work. even when i try to do things on my own, it's just so mentally taxing that i end up sleeping for 24+ hours after attempting to make myself feel better. it's a lot, i guess.

"... if i wasn't so afraid of death and dying, then maybe-."

heeseung felt his heart drop. he forced himself to stop reading; he couldn't continue, knowing that's where y/n's mind went.

how long had y/n been feeling this way? was there truth in what the other boys were saying? was this post about them?

shaking his head, heeseung refocused his attention on his friends. they all sat around him, angered by the post that y/n had made just the day before. the only person - save for himself - who wasn't mad about what y/n posted was jungwon. but heeseung couldn't tell if that was because he was still able to view her close friends story on instagram or if jungwon was genuinely worried about y/n.

even if the post was about them, heeseung told himself that that was the least of their concerns. the only thing that mattered to him (and he was surprised that his friends didn't seem to think similarly on the subject) was how y/n felt.

as the others went on to bash y/n for posting that and not being upfront with them about her feelings, heeseung handed jungwon back his phone.

"like honestly, i thought we were friends. what is her problem?" sunghoon circled back.

heeseung stood from his seat at the park table, white-knuckled fists suddenly clenched at his side. he startled the others with how abruptly he got up, but he didn't seem to care. "are you all fucking hearing yourself right now?"

"did you not just see what she posted yesterday?" jay asked.

ni-ki looked up at his hyung and added, "and she's so messy for re-adding us to her close friends list. if it wasn't for jungwon hyung, we wouldn't have ever seen this. so i bet she thinks she got away with talking shit about us like that."

"that's exactly what she was thinking!" jake chimed in.

heeseung didn't stay to hear what his insensitive friends had to say next. he simply told the five of them to "fuck off" and bid jungwon goodbye before storming off from the scene. as he neared his car, he reached for his phone from his back pocket; he wanted to text y/n. he needed to! however, upon closer inspection, he realized that his phone was out of battery. and of course, today was the day his car's charging cable broke!

groaning to himself, heeseung let himself into his vehicle and just drove. with his phone dead, there was no way for him to reach y/n to give her the heads-up that he'd be arriving anytime soon... but he also figured - given what he had read only minutes and minutes ago - that she would be home regardless.

his thoughts drifted back to y/n. he kept wondering how long she had been feeling that way. he wondered if she felt lonely because while she was locked away in her apartment, the rest of them were still going to each other's houses and planning group excursions... excursions, heeseung came to realize, that y/n wasn't invited to.

fuck! he thought as he came to a red light. if that post truly was about him and the rest of the guys, was it not deserved? he thought back to all the times that they went out without inviting y/n and he wondered if her fomo eventually got so bad she thought that they had silently kicked her out of the friend group. no... there's no way she thought that! right? y/n had a lot more sense than to think that a few outings without her meant that they no longer wanted to be her friend. right?!

the light stayed red as heeseung's mind swirled with several different thoughts. there was more to the post. heeseung knew that. granted, he didn't read it as thoroughly as his friends had, but he had skimmed through it quickly enough. the others were so hung up on the fact that y/n said she didn't have any friends; heeseung also guessed they were angry over the little bits of text that followed her dark thoughts. but... was she wrong to say all those things? the other seemed to think so. so much so that they completely ignored the blatant cry for help that was the entirety of y/n's post.

when the light finally turned green, heeseung couldn't stop thinking about the first line of the last paragraph. "...if i wasn't so afraid of death and dying, then maybe all of this would be so much easier."

in the three years that heeseung had gotten to know y/n, he had to admit that he was very aware of how dangerously dark her thoughts could be. there were moments when he wouldn't hear from her for weeks at a time. he remembered how y/n would lament on the droves of friends she had lost in the years prior because they hated when she would fall into her slump. after all, she wouldn't text anyone for days at a time; he recalled how when she recalled those memories, it somehow always ended with the friends telling her that she was selfish or that she wasn't trying hard enough to get better.

heeseung quickly parked his car in the guest space of y/n's apartment complex. from his spot, he could see the curtains of her bedroom window weren't drawn, but the window was cracked opened ever-so-slightly. he found himself devising a plan b in case y/n didn't come to the door and it involved somehow shimmying up to the second floor and busting through her window.

without another moment to lose, he rapidly bashed his pointer finger against the doorbell. at least if she was sleeping, he was certain that this'd wake her up!

not even a minute had gone by when y/n flung her apartment door open. heeseung took in the sight of her. her hair, a tangled, matted mess. if he had to guess, he assumed her knots were much worse at the back of her head. he noted that the fullness of her cheeks had vanished. she looked so gaunt compared to the last time he saw her; he wondered when the last time she ate was... or at least when the last time she ate anything of sustenance was.

y/n looked at heeseung with tired eyes. she frowned for a moment, only to replace it with a sad smile.

"have you come to air your grievances with me in person?" she said in a strained whisper.

if heeseung had been gutted before, he had no idea what this new feeling was. whatever it was though, it shattered whatever was left of him. he had known y/n to have horrible episodes of hopelessness and defeat, but this was too much for him to bear. he couldn't even begin to imagine how she was feeling. she was a shell of herself.

"... what are you talking about?" he asked gently.

"i just thought..." y/n let out a deep, long sigh. she looked down at her hello kitty house slippers, not finishing her thought aloud. she tightly wrapped her arms around herself as she stroked her right upper arm slowly.

instinctively, heeseung removed his coat and draped it over y/n. her bloodshot, tired eyes looked up at him once more. he wanted to hold her. to make her feel his warmth. to make her feel his love. he just wanted her to see she wasn't alone anymore.

"you just thought what?" he asked as y/n ushered him inside.

she shut the door behind her and wordlessly led him to the small couch in her living room. heeseung saw the nest she had created for herself with her blankets, pillows, and plushies in the dark space. the only source of light came from her muted television, which was currently airing reruns of old cartoons from the 1990s and the early 2000s. there were torn-up bags of chips (some empty and some half-full), unfinished, open bottles of soju and cans of beer, and a plethora of takeout boxes scattered around her little nest across her tiny coffee table. trash and dirty laundry lined the floor around her couch.

"sorry about the mess. i haven't had visitors in over six months now..."

six months. the last time anyone had seen y/n had been over seven months ago. sure, they had seen her posting all about her trip back to the states a month ago, but no one had physically been in her presence in over half a year. heeseung wanted to kick himself. why hadn't he visited sooner?

"no... please don't apologize-."

"i'm embarrassed," she whispered, trying to make space on the couch by tossing all of her used bedding to the floor.

heeseung stopped her in time, insisting that it was fine. after all, he had been the one to show up unannounced.

"what were you talking about before, y/n?" heeseung tried holding her gaze, but she quickly averted her eyes to her slippers once more. "what grievances are you talking about?"

every sigh that escaped y/n's lips was a dagger to heeseung's heart. he watched as she struggled to find the words to say. sensing her panic, heeseung guided her into her cocoon of blankets - making some room for himself as well. the two of them sat side-by-side in silence. he could wait all day for her to reply, especially if it meant not leaving her alone in this state.

"your friends," y/n reached for her phone from the recesses of her blankets, "they all texted me these paragraphs about something that i posted privately yesterday."

WHAT?!

heeseung could feel his blood boiling. "how do you mean?"

PARAGRAPHS?!

y/n unlocked her phone and handed the device to the man beside her. just as soon as he got a hold of her phone, she quickly retracted her hand and brought it to her eyes, rubbing away at them.

heeseung first watched as y/n began to curl up into a ball, then he directed his attention to her phone. upon first glance at her message app, he noticed that there were three circles pinned to the top: two group chats - one called "ohana 👑" and the other "the tortured poets department 🖊️" - and a silly selfie of him and y/n with the nickname "evan lee 💜" plastered just below it. a blush danced upon his cheeks at the sight of it all.

however, the warmth in his cheeks lasted for only a millisecond as his eyes fell just below their text thread; it appeared that ni-ki, jay, sunghoon, jake, and sunoo all sent messages to y/n in the time that it took for heeseung to arrive. heeseung tapped at the most recent of the texts, sunoo's. he repeated the process with jake's, sunghoon's, jay's, and finally, ni-ki's texts. with each scroll through of texts from his friends, he found himself getting angrier and angrier at them. especially after reading y/n's responses to each of them.

it was hard to tell tone over text, but heeseung knew his friends well. each message to y/n was crafted uniquely and in the sender's own words, but the gist of what they were saying was all the same.

they each started their message by telling y/n that they had been with jungwon the day before and how he had asked them if she was okay. they all state that they didn't know what he could possibly be talking about until jungwon mentioned that it was in reference to her instagram story - a story he failed to mention was only for close friends.

jay and sunoo went on to say that they didn't mind that they couldn't see her story; y/n was allowed to pick and choose who she wanted to see those stories. jake, ni-ki, and sunghoon - on the other hand - took major offense into not being able to see her story, considering "everything" they had been through "together with k". they all mentioned how deeply hurt they were by the fact that y/n said she had not friends. ni-ki had gone as far as to say, "i thought that me and the hyungs were your friends. but i guess not, huh?"

they then followed up their emotions with the same statements they were exclaiming at the park, about how if y/n had something to say about them to just outright say it and not dabble in this "high school bullshit and make everyone play this stupid game where they have to figure out what the hell it is they did wrong" (as jake put it in his text). in sunoo's message, he claimed that he was only reaching out to y/n because he wanted to be upfront with her and couldn't think of a single thing he might have done to offend her. jay and sunghoon continued to stress the fact that their text wasn't meant to be read as an attack, but they "wanted to be adults about the situation instead of resorting to petty, childish drama" because they too couldn't think of anything to warrant such a post from y/n. ni-ki drew from the fact that he and the rest of the boys were hurting over this and how it was "shady and cringy" to post a story like that on her social media account; he accused her of just wanting attention because he "didn't do anything wrong" so for her to post that with the implication that he had irritate the maknae to no end.

just like that, each of them wrapped up their lengthy chunks of text to y/n with such vitriol that heeseung couldn't believe that these were his friends. he knew they were coming from a place of hurt, but he was surprised that they didn't see y/n's post for what it truly was: a cry for help.

instead, they turned her raw emotions into their hurt egos. they decided to take bits and pieces of y/n's story and mold it into this narrative where she attempted to assassinate their characters. it went from being a post about how utterly depressed and pathetic she felt to being a post about them.

and heeseung was livid.

with all of them.

when had they become so self-important? if they were truly y/n's friends like they had so furiously claimed to be, why hadn't any of them asked if she was okay? even jungwon failed to ask her, opting instead to ask his hyungs and ni-ki - which, arguably got everyone in this mess in the first place.

heeseung felt his mind drift back to y/n's reply to each of the boys' texts. while he didn't read every single one, he did read the only one that got a text back, y/n's text to ni-ki. it was a long, heartfelt apology from y/n; heeseung could see how this whole mess was tearing her up inside just from her words to ni-ki alone. but he got even madder when he got to her parting words, only to see that ni-ki had replied with, "k. thanks for reaching out. i just need time for myself if i'm being honest. bye."

before he could say anything, heeseung was brought back to reality when he caught y/n silently sobbing into her hands from the corner of his eye.

"i'm sorry!" she whispered. over and over again. each time more broken than the last.

heeseung gently pulled her closer to his chestm cradling her to him as he rubbed his thumb against her back in an effort to comfort her. "you have nothing to be sorry for..."

"i hurt everyone's feelings-!"

"fuck them," heeseung growled, holding her tighter. "i'm sorry. i'm sorry that they let their egos get in the way of being decent human beings. i'm sorry that you've felt so alone for the last few months. i'm sorry that i haven't shown up for you in the way that you needed someone to be there."

y/n cried harder. "i... i... i... i didn't... i didn't mean..." her hiccups were affecting the rhythm of her speech. "i didn't mean that... that we weren't friends! i just... i just felt-."

"shhhh," he soothed as she shuddered under his embrace. "we haven't been very good friends to you as of lately, anyway. they're like my brothers and i love them, but those messages alone... we haven't been decent friends to you. i can understand how easy it is to feel like you're this lonely, little island, especially when the rest of us are still going out and making no effort to see how you're doing.

"i saw their messages to you. in ni-ki's case specifically, i scrolled up a little too far and saw that you've spent the last half of these past few months messaging him little things like tiktoks and memes only for him to like them or reply to you with one word. have you been reaching out to the rest of the boys?"

he felt her nod against his chest.

oh... so he was the only one to not have heard from her. the green-eyed monster crept into his thoughts momentarily, only for him to realize that the others' text threads were probably just as dry as ni-ki's.

"i'm really sorry that i didn't reach out to you sooner," heeseung sighed. "i really don't know what i was thinking. i'm sorry that you've felt so alone."

once y/n had calmed down enough to stop her hiccups, she excused herself to grab a glass of water. she asked heeseung if he wanted anything while she was up, but he declined - instead offering to get the glass for her. she appreciated the gesture but went to get the water herself.

this moment alone left heeseung in his thoughts again. he didn't want her to have to recount anything to him if she didn't want to, but he still needed to know. in her text to ni-ki, she said that she hadn't meant to keep jungwon on her list of close friends. that what she posted hadn't meant to be for the people she had met in south korea; it was for her friends back home - as a way to vent out the frustrations she hadn't known how to put into words for her korean audience. these frustrations, from what heeseung could gather, were things she wasn't ready to tell him or the others.

but the others had practically forced it out of her in her apologies to them...

... and ni-ki had the gall to tell her that he needed time and space from her. the rest left her on read - as if only turning their read receipts on for this moment alone.

heeseung could feel himself getting worked up all over again. gripping tightly at the fabric of his jeans, he sat up straighter when he heard y/n coming back to the darkened living room.

"i'm sorry," y/n whispered as she neared him.

heeseung stared up at her helplessly as she sat beside him. "no, there's nothing to be-."

"i meant to take all of you off my 'close friends' list. it wasn't because i didn't think we were friends; there are just some things from my past that i'm not ready to talk about with you guys yet-."

"and you don't have to! i'm sorry that the rest of them think that you owe us that..."

"i mean... they thought it was about them; they just wanted to clear things up and let how they were feeling be known," y/n said with a sigh, pulling heeseung's coat closer to her chest. "i offended them. i respect them from being upfront about their feelings-."

"IT'S FUCKING BULLSHIT!" heeseung stood up to face y/n. "WHY ARE THEY ALLOWED TO EXPRESS THEIR EMOTIONS LIKE THAT AND YOU'RE NOT?"

regret washed over heeseung as he noticed y/n's sullen eyes widen. she bit her quivering lips and heeseung wanted to punch himself in the face.

"sorry," he muttered. "i didn't mean to blow up like that. i just..."

heeseung knelt before y/n.

"no, it's okay," she said, avoiding his gaze.

"it's not... and what the guys did isn't okay either. yeah, they confronted you because they thought it was about them and they want to clear the air, but there's a way to go about that. and for ni-ki to go off on your like that only to leave you with that 'i need space' bullshit of a text-."

"he's just a kid."

"i get that, but i have no idea where the boys get off with being so... i don't know... vain? for lack of a better word. their reactions just feel so... guilty. as if they had done something-."

"i was being extremely vague in my post."

heeseung took y/n's shaking hands, finally holding her gaze as she looked at him. she seemed shocked by the physical interaction; he wondered how long it had been since she had touched another person outside their hug minutes ago.

"exactly! if it wasn't about them, but they somehow found a way to relate to it? i don't know... again, i think they're acting out of guilt," heeseung caressed the back of her hands with his thumb.

y/n gave heeseung a sad smile. "i get their side. with the way i worded everything, i can see how they relate what i wrote with the way everyone handled everything between k and me a few years ago."

heeseung felt y/n rip her hands away from his as she buried her face into her hands. sitting back on the couch, he pulled her into another hug; she didn't seem to be crying again, but he couldn't be too sure anymore. y/n hadn't mentioned her past relationship with k since their nasty breakup, but he remembered how unbothered she had been upon seeing him seven months ago at jake's birthday party. he also remembered how angered y/n had been - despite being unbothered at k's initial presence - because he attempted to approach her while she was alone at the open bar, grabbing refills for heeseung, sunghoon, and herself.

"... did the post have anything to do with k?" heeseung asked. he felt her go stiff at the mention of her ex-boyfriend before shaking her head against his chest and letting out a small sniffle. "okay, then? so the boys had nothing to worry about. it's just this huge misunderstanding. if they want to hold it against you, fuck 'em."

"i still really hurt their feelings."

"you apologized. did they?"

y/n pushed heeseung away to hug her legs to her chest. she shook her head. "but... a selfish part of me really feels like i'm owed one."

"it's not selfish - especially after you cleared it up with them. they jumped conclusions and said extremely hurtful things to you. if they truly did no wrong - which who knows, maybe they didn't do anything wrong! - i don't know... maybe they shouldn't have been so defensive. i don't know! maybe it's just me... but their behavior is downright embarrassing!"

with another sigh, y/n leaned against heeseung, who instantly wrapped his arm around her; it felt just like before, like no time had passed between the two of them. like there wasn't this mix of guilt, hopelessness, and despair in the air between them.

"embarrassing?"

"how else would your describe it when you make someone else's trauma and hurting about you?" heeseung asked, giving y/n's shoulder a tight squeeze. "y/n, i know you. i know you're not going to hold this another the boys, but i think their reaction to all of this is downright stupid. you talked about some pretty serious stuff in your post, but they pushed past that to complain that you might have posted about them. that doesn't sit right with me-."

"it's not that deep, hee-."

"except it is, y/n! this is exactly what happened with k hyung after you two broke up and more recently after jake's party. specifically after jake's party, you posted something privately about how hard things have been on your end and how it was affecting your mental health; someone shared it with him and he confronted you-."

"k apologized-."

"but then he immediately turned the conversation into 'i'm sorry, but also you hurt me!' and then you two only focused on his feelings!" heeseung thought back to that time. "i just... i feel like the boys took whatever was posted in the wrong direction. and even then, it wasn't even aimed in their direction to begin with! there are worse things to be done and that have been done than taking someone off your story then putting them back on..."

y/n pressed herself closer to heeseung as he continued.

"and honestly... whatever was actually said in your story was so much bigger than their feelings being hurt, y/n. because we both know that wasn't what it was about."

"hee..."

"look, i know... i know that you never meant for any of us to see it, but we did. and instead of seeing it for what it was, most of them made it about themselves. and i'm sorry for that. i'm sorry that we haven't been good friends to you lately - to the point where you felt like we weren't your friends to begin with. they're allowed to be hurt over it if they truly think that it's about them, but they can't just ambush you like that and then close the discussion when you clear the air and open it up for them. honestly, with the way all of this was handled, i wouldn't be surprised if you still stood by that statement! it's almost like... at every turn, you're reprimanded in some way for posting about your feelings. someone always has to take it out of context and make it about themselves.

"you literally told every single one of them that it had nothing to do with them and they have the audacity to sit there and say that they need time away from you? again, that doesn't sit right with me! why are you made to be the problem in every situation you're stuck to struggle with!"

there was still so much more heeseung had wanted to say, but the sounds of y/n's violent sobs had stopped him. she began to wail into his chest again and she squeezed him closer to her. heeseung felt his heart breaking as he looked down at one of his best friends. she wept loudly, screaming incoherent phrases into him while heeseung held her tightly.

"i'm sorry," heeseung whispered into her hair, pulling her onto his lap. "i'm sorry that i wasn't there for you before... i'm sorry that it's taken me so long to see how much you've been hurting. i'm sorry for everything. but i'm here now."

[saltwaterburns]

even my phone misses your call, by the way

Summary: Elle knows perfectly well that it's a bad idea and that she'll probably regret it when she sobers up, but she still picks up her phone and dials the number of the one she misses the most - you.

Pairing: Elle Greenaway x fem!reader

Warnings: Mentions of a slightly graphic event that happened to the reader, allusions to smut, a few y/n's, no happy ending (for now?)

Author's note: It's day 3 of me watching season 2 after Elle left and it's safe to say that I'm still incredibly wounded, so what better way to project my feelings onto everyone else than writing this! :D For a girl who hates reading angst I sure do love writing it, so buckle up. I'm dedicating this to @bbbbadoobee i hope u like it pls dont hate me

Word count: 4,4k+

Elle knows she shouldn't. She left the BAU for a reason, and it's late. She glances at the clock on the wall, wincing as the time reads close to 3am. But as she sits in her bleak living room, her third bottle of vodka sitting unfinished on the table right next to her phone, she doesn't care about making good decisions. She's lonely. Desperate.

Leaving didn't make her feel any better. She's been lonely for years. She found a home within the BAU, and she doesn't think she'll ever be able to get over it. Get over her team, that at one point became her family.

She's drunk, and she's tired. She should go to bed. Instead, she picks up her phone, and calls you. She misses your voice the most.

It's been years. She doubts you'll answer. She listens to how her phone calls once, then twice, and on the third time when you pick up, she relaxes. "Y/n...it- it's me."

"...Elle?" You ask groggily, sitting up on your bed and trying to rub the sleep away from your eyes with the back of your hand. Wait, what? Elle? You voice your thought.

"Wait, what? Elle? Elle Greenaway?"

Her heart immediately lurches towards you at the sound of your sleep-ridden voice. She can see you so clearly in her minds eye, how you're sitting on your bed, the strap of your sleep top falling off your shoulder, how the freckles painted on your skin form constellations, the same ones she used to trace with her lips.

"Surprise, I guess." Elle responds, her tone a bit off in attempt to seem casual. Her heart is racing right now, but her voice remains steady. "Did I wake you?"

You stay silent for a beat. You don't notice it at first, but the hand you just used to pull the blanket tighter around you and now is resting on your lap is shaking. You can feel your throat constricting and your eyes beginning to sting, both from the lack of sleep and the emotions you're feeling.

"Yeah, yeah you did, but it's fine. Is- is everything okay? I didn't know you still had my number."

Her heart sinks, hearing how off you sound. Your voice quivers a bit, and she can only imagine your face right now, probably pinched and hurt.

"Of course I do." Elle says, and her voice softens a bit. Maybe she shouldn't have called. What was she thinking would happen?

"I just..." She struggles to articulate her thoughts as she rubs a hand over her face. "I needed to hear your voice."

"I, um, I miss you, Elle. We miss you, back at the BAU," You whisper, looking up at the pale ceiling of your room, taking a deep breath to force the tears down. "How are you?"

Your question feels like a punch to the gut, and for a moment, she can't speak. Because how is she actually doing?

"Oh, I..." She hesitates, and swallows the lump in her throat. "I'm...I'm fine." After a few moments, she adds sheepishly, "And I, I miss you guys too..I miss you a lot."

"Did you continue with some sort of federal work at your new um, home?" You ask as casually as possible, the word home leaving a bitter taste in your mouth, because her home should be here, with you, not wherever she is right now.

She's glad you're not prodding her for more information, asking more questions that would be too difficult for her to answer. But she does cringe a bit.

"...No." She finally replies, and her voice is more than a bit embarrassed. "I went...in a different direction."

"That's, that's good, actually. I hoped that you wouldn't. Thought that it would be better for you to leave this life behind, get a chance to heal."

A moment of silence follows that. You don't know what else to say, so you're twisting a strand of your hair around your finger as you wait. But you've always been curious, always digging a little too deep and as you're speaking to her for the first time in years, you can't help but ask.

"Are you happy, Elle?" Was you leaving us worth it?

She listens as you speak, and her heart hurts because when you say it like that, it sounds like you know what's best for her. She thinks for a moment you might tell her to come back, to heal with all of you.

But you ask her if she's happy instead.

And her heart hurts even more because it's the most difficult question you could've asked her.

"Define happy." She says, finally.

From those two words alone you know that she isn't, not fully at least. The perks of being a profiler, you suppose.

"Can you sleep without waking up in cold sweat? Have you managed to stop reaching for a gun that isn't there? Have you stopped being hypervigilant when walking on the street?"

She swallows thickly once you ask her those questions. And the fact that she can't answer any of them with a yes makes her temples ache.

"I..." Her voice trails off, and she shakes her head as if you can see it. "I don't...no. No, not really." She finally says with a sigh. "I can't sleep, I still reach for a gun, and I'm paranoid as ever that someone is after me."

You rest your forehead against your knees that you've tucked under your chest and you bite your lip hard enough to draw blood to keep your tears at bay. All that pain, and and suffering and everything that she's gone through still haunts her, as if her leaving this life behind hasn't had any impact at all.

"I haven't seen you in so long. Did you grow your hair out? Or did you keep the bangs and the bob?"

"The bangs and the bob." She says, and she winces as she realizes how much she actually misses you. If she concentrates hard enough, she can almost feel the ghost of your hands playing with her hair. "I have a few more grays now, though. I'm a real old lady."

You can't help but let out laugh at that, but it comes out wet. You cringe at that. An average person might've missed it but you know that she heard and you know that she has put it together that you're crying. You cringe even more.

"I'm not the youngest anymore either, Greenaway. Sporting a few greys myself under these luscious curls. Thankfully it's not too visible."

You're right - the wetness in your laugh doesn't go unnoticed. Her eyes immediately tear up as well, and she swallows against the lump of guilt in her throat, because she knows she's the reason you're crying right now.

"Yeah, well, you're too pretty to go grey anyway." She's teases right back, but her words are also laced in bittersweetness.

"Always the charmer, huh?" You bite your lip in a smile, feeling giddy for a moment. "Is there, um, anyone special for you nowadays? Are you tied down?"

"No one special, no tied down." She says quickly, maybe too quickly for it to be casual. After a few moments of silence, she adds, hesitantly, "Is there someone special for you right now?"

You shake your head, because how could there ever be someone who isn't her in my bed and in my heart, but then you remember she can't see you so you somehow manage to utter a soft "No."

"There isn't. There hasn't been one, really, ever since you left. You're always in the back of my mind." Your voice quietens as you say the last part.

She can feel her heart start racing when you respond, her body tensing up. She can't believe what she's hearing. There's no one special in your bed, no one in your heart...not even in these last YEARS since she left?

There's this strange, overwhelming sensation that rises up in her. One part of her wants to be angry that you've wasted away waiting for her. But the other part of her, the part that has her heart racing can't help but feel happy. Hopeful.

You keep talking, not giving her a chance to say something in between. "I know what you're gonna say. I can imagine your face and your expression so clearly. You're mad that I've wasted years waiting for you, even though I knew that the chances of me ever seeing you again were close to none. But I just couldn't help it. You can't blame me for that."

She actually laughs aloud at that, because you know her so damn well. She's frustrated, because of course, you've guessed right. She doesn't want you to have waited for her, especially in vain.

She never intended to see any of you again, especially you. And of course, you couldn't help it, because that's who you are. Loyal to a fault.

"You're right, I'm pretty damn frustrated right now." She responds, and her tone is more fond than angry.

"How can you expect me to move on after what we had, Elle? After those nights in the jet? After the nights curled together under the sheets? After we've taken bullets for each other, after I've stitched you up with my bare hands and bailed you out of jail? After that night we spent together right before you left the next morning, leaving me to wake up to an empty bed?" Your voice breaks in the middle of your ramble, and you can feel the hot trails your salty tears are leaving on your cheeks.

"How can you blame me for waiting when you're the only woman I've ever loved?"

You leave her, for the first time in a while, completely speechless. Every event you name flashes before her eyes, so familiar yet so far away. There's so much she wishes she could say, but she's always been a coward when it comes to voicing what she feels.

"Why did you call me, Elle?" You ask, your voice no louder than a gust of wind. Your bed feels extra cold tonight, too large for you to sleep in it alone. You curl up on your side, clutching your phone in your hand.

Why did she call you? She asks herself the very same question, and the guilt begins to chew on her when she realises she doesn't have an answer for you.

"I...." Her voice breaks. "I don't know. I just...I wanted to hear your voice. I missed you, I guess."

Her answer is as unsatisfying as you guessed it would be. For some reason you hoped that she'd confess her own love for you as well, telling you everything you've longed to hear for all these years. But her answer is as vague as always, and the disappointment burns.

"Did you know that Gideon left, too? And that Hotch and Haley got divorced?" You ask meekly, toying with the silky sheets under you.

She knows. She hates herself for it, but she's kept tabs on all the team since she left. She knows about Gideon, about Hotchner's and Haley's divorce, about Haley's ....

Every single time she finds herself reaching for her phone, about to type in a phone number, she has to remind herself that it's healthier for her not to reach out. But each time, it has gotten more and more difficult.

Her voice comes out soft and remorseful. "Yeah, I know, I...I've heard."

Oh.

"I got taken hostage a few months ago. Barely made it out alive, was in a coma for two weeks. Did you know that?"

Her blood runs cold in her veins as you say that, her heart rate increasing immediately. Her hands begin to shake and her eyes widen.

"No. I- no, I didn't know that. You...?" Her voice falters as she begins to ask that question, and she pauses before trying to finish that sentence. "You were in a coma? What happened?"

There's something satisfying about hearing her panic, however cruel that might be. It feels good to know that she didn't reach out because she simply didn't know.

"There was a bomb. I was too close. Hit my head against a block of concrete so hard my skull fractured and my two of my ribs broke off, piercing my lungs."

The moment you say all of that, she actually feels dizzy with panic.

Imagining you lying on the floor in pain, struggling to breathe, struggling to stay alive.. She can feel her nausea rising as her stomach twists.

Elle can't speak as she thinks about all of it. You could've died. She almost lost you and she wouldn't even have known. Would Garcia have told her?

"I'm okay now, though," You whisper softly with a smile, hoping that she can hear it through your voice. "Sometimes I get really bad migraines, but the doctors say I shouldn't have any other complications."

She tries to collect herself, steadying her breath as you tell her that you're okay. Mostly okay, she should say. But you're here, so that's what matters.

"Y-yeah?" She asks, her voice a bit shaky. "How long ago was this, baby?"

Baby. She always used to call you baby. It used to fill you with fluttering butterflies but now it just feels like swallowing acid.

"I think it was at the beginning of the year. It's July now, so 5 months at least." You hum in thought, counting back the months on your fingers. A car drives past your window, the lights flashing, and it feels melancholy. You can't help but let your mind wonder and imagine it's Elle, coming to see you. But she won't, you know she won't.

"Five months..." Her heart aches to think of you going through all of that, dealing with that alone, while she didn't even know. Didn't even check up on you. She hates herself for it, even more than usual. She feels like she's going to throw up.

"Y-you never, did you..?" She can't even get out her question, swallowing heavily. "...call me?"

"...I tried to. I asked Garcia if she could find any way for me to contact you, but she never managed to. You disappeared pretty good on us." You laugh a little, but there isn't any humour behind it. Just a little hurt.

Her heart sinks at your answer, and she closes her eyes in anguish. Goddamn it. Of course you tried to call her. Of course you wanted her there.

"Yeah, I..." She tries to speak, tries to find her words, but she can't. Not when she knows how badly she hurt you.

"M'sorry." She finally murmurs, a bitter feeling bubbling up her throat.

You coo at her. "It's okay, Elle. I'm fine now, aren't I? And you're on the other end of the phone. No need to fret about it now. I didn't mean to make you feel bad with all of this, by the way. I wasn't trying to rub it under your nose. I was just curious if you knew."

She swallows at that. Even now, even after she's abandoned you, left you behind, caused you pain, you're still trying to comfort her. Trying to make her feel better, trying to tell her what she wants to hear.

She doesn't know why she expected something else, but she hates it.

"You're too kind for your own damn good, you know that, Y/n?" Even saying that is hurting her.

You don't know what to say to that. You've never been good with compliments or praises of any sort, so you just blush and change the subject.

"Did you know that Spence and Morgan still talk about you? Oh, Elle would've known this and Elle would've liked that gets thrown around the office pretty often."

A faint smile tugs on her lips and a small laugh escapes her.

Thinking about Spencer and Morgan still having her in their thoughts doesn't make her feel exactly good, but it makes her feel something.

"Really now?" She asks, her voice still a bit rough from earlier, trying to mask her excitement. "What do they say about me?"

"They still value your opinion very highly, even after all this time. It wasn’t always like that, though. Your name has a lot of respect at Quantico now, but it was a very sensitive topic for a good while. You're missed....I miss you, too." I reminiscence, letting my eyes fall shut. If I try hard enough, I can pretend that she's here and that we're talking face to face, not thousands of miles apart.

"Where are you? Are you still in the US? Or did you leave?"

"I'm still in the US," She replies softly, the corner of her lips pulled back in a sad smile. "I'm in New York. I...couldn't imagine going farther than this from here."

"The Big Apple, huh? I've never been. It sounds awesome, though. I'd love to go one day as a tourist, not as a profiler. Fly economy and all that stuff." You laugh softly, turning to lay on your back.

She grins widely because the thought of you walking around New York, on a vacation, having a good time - it seems like a faraway dream to her.

"It is awesome.There's quite a bit to do, and to see. Especially for a tourist that's not on call."

The hours of the night are catching up to you and you can feel sleep pushing it’s dull claws into you, but you don't want to tell her that. Hanging up could mean never talking to her again.

"Is the subway really as dirty as they show in movies?"

She responds with a snort and an eye roll. "It's worse. Far worse."

"Yeah?" you ask, giggling quietly. "You're having hand to hand combat with the rats?"

"It feels like it, honestly," She grins at your question. "Fighting them for a seat, that is. I feel like I've seen more rats and roaches than human people."

You let out a loud laugh at that and cover your face, letting your phone drop from your hand, your heart feeling light.

A genuine laugh escapes her at that, and the sound of it surprises her. When was the last time she had laughed like that? Was it back when she had just started at Quantico?

For a moment, it feels like the years between the two of you have disappeared, and she's in your bedroom, laughing with you as the night deepens. As the noise calms down and both of your breathing returns to normal, you feel tears prickling in your eyes yet again.

"Will I ever see you again?"

Her body goes rigid at that. She was just having a good moment with you, giggling and laughing, and now...her stomach is in knots.

How could she answer your question? She wants to say "yes, of course", but that wouldn't be true. She wants to say "no, probably not", and that wouldn't be fully true either.

Instead, she swallows and says, "I-I don't know, Y/n. I don't know."

You expected that.

"Tell me that I will, Elle. Tell me that you'll be here tomorrow morning, that you knocking on my door will wake me up. Even if it’s a lie. Please tell me." You beg, a sense of urgency and desperation in your voice.

Her heart thumps wildly inside her ribcage as she listens to you. It's like her heart and mind are having a mental battle, because they want completely different things.

She wants to be there. She wants to be the one to wake you up by banging on the door, she wants to see you in all your glory, hair and clothes messed up from sleep, your cheeks puffy...she wants that more than anything in the world.

But it's not so simple. Her mind is reeling with all the reasons why this can't happen, why she shouldn’t grant you the peace of her saying it, but she can't help it. You’ve always been her vice.

"Please tell me that I'll see you tomorrow." you plead again, your voice cracking. Your heart is constricting inside your chest.

Her resolve begins to crumble at your desperation. God, you're begging her. And she can't find it in her to disappoint you.

"You'll see me tomorrow," She finds herself saying, her voice barely above a whisper. It hurts her to say it, because it's a lie. Because it won't be true come the morning, which means she's setting you up for that same disappointment she tried to avoid just now.

You quickly wipe the tears from your cheeks with the back of your hand, nodding along, feeling reassured. Kind of.

"Will you- will you hang up, now?"

She doesn't want to. She wants to keep talking to you, but she knows she's keeping you up. She can hear the tiredness that’s laced in your voice.

"Yeah..I should," She murmurs begrudgingly, her voice thick with emotion.

Your resolve breaks.

"I love you, Elle. I don't think I'll ever stop," You can't help but confess, the words feeling like shards of glass leaving your mouth.

Her heart shatters into dust when you say the words. It's the most beautiful and yet the saddest thing she's heard in years.

She knows, of course she does. She’s always known that you loved her. Back when you were sneaking around with each other, when you were convulsing around her fingers, your climax having you cramped up, the three words always fell from your lips one way or another. She just didn’t have it in her to say them herself. But now, she has to cover her mouth to stop herself from confessing the same. Her breathing wavers and her hands shake.

"Don't say that, Y/n. Don't say that," She all but begs, her voice strangled and strained.

"You know that I do. My heart is yours and yours only. You know that, too." you keep on going, your voice thick with emotion.

The words pierce her like a dagger right into the heart. She can't deny it and she can't tell you to stop, so instead, she responds with a soft, broken, "I know, I know you do. And you know that I feel the same.”

"Say it, Elle. Please? Say it properly." You plead her gently, toying with the straps of your sleep top. You suddenly notice that it's one of Elle's old shirts that she left here. You swallow back a sob.

She feels her heart beating erratically as you urge her to say the words. It's such a simple thing, just three little words. Three words that she's wanted to say to you for years, but always held back.

"I love you, Y/n," She finally confesses, her voice quavering. "God help me, I love you."

You laugh softly and close your eyes as you finally let the tears stream down your face freely. Hearing her finally say those three words was probably the most painful thing you’ll ever experience, but it feels euphoric. After all these years.

She isn't sure how to label what she’s feeling. Relief? Anguish? Saying that she loves you should make her happy, but all she feels is a deep aching pain because she knows that it isn't going to change anything. But what’s done is done. She can't take it back now, and she's just made the whole thing so much harder.

"I'm sorry," She apologizes, her voice cracking now. "I'm sorry, Y/n. I love you, I've always loved you, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, honey. You know I'll always forgive you, and this time it isn't even your fault. Thank you for loving me. I love you, too. I'm ready to hang up now, if you want. I know this can't be easy for you either."

She can't speak past the lump forming in her throat. How do you always manage to forgive her? Saying that this time it's not her fault. You're so kind, too kind. But you’ve always been like that, and she feels sick for taking advantage of that. She wouldn’t deserve you even in a million lifetimes.

"Yeah," She manages to croak. "I should go, and you have to get some sleep. It’s late."

"I don't know if you'll call me ever again, but thank you for doing it today. It feels nice, talking to you again. I missed you terribly."

Her heart breaks hearing that you think this might be the last time she ever calls, even though there’s a high possibility that it is. She wants to tell you that she'll call you again, and again and again, but she can't. She can't promise you that. She can't make you false promises, not anymore. So instead she just murmurs, "I missed you, too. Night, baby."

"G'night, Elle.." you whisper, barely audible, and press the end button. A small click sound echoes around the now eerily silent room and you let out a wail, falling on top of your pillows in sobs.

Elle can't move for a few moments after you hang up, just sitting and staring at the wall. She feels numb. Cold. Empty. Why the hell did she do that?

She can still hear the sound of you crying, it was so distinct and full of pain, even through the phone. She's the one that did that, she made you cry. It’s just like the day she left.

With a pained cry, she brings the phone down to her lap and buries her head in her hands, squeezing her eyes tightly shut.

You don't know whether to hate or to love her for picking up that phone tonight and pressing that call button. Your heart feels strangely light after finally being able to free itself from all the emotions it’s had to carry over the years, but your soul feels terrifyingly empty. What now? You just go back to your everyday routine and pretend that tonight didn't exist?

The same thought is racing through Elle's mind. There's a small part of her that's glad she managed to hear your voice again, but everything else...god, she just made things so much harder for the both of you.

You're going to wake up tomorrow morning, and there won't be anyone at your door.

That realization, that she did that to you...it kills her. But right now, she can't undo it. What's done is done.

It's stupid, but as you lay on your cold sheets, alone yet again, falling in and out of consciousness, you can't help but hope that you’ll find her behind your front door as the morning comes.

hi please excuse the repetitive words and the medical talk idk if your ribs piercing your lungs is either survivable or puts you in a coma

[topmalereaderblog]

You deserve better // Miguel O'Hara 🌸🚨⚠️

Theme(s): Fluff / Angst / Mature

Warning(s): Infidelity, abuse, realization, jealous Miguel, happy ending.

Summary: Miguel hates it when people have everything and are still ungrateful for what they have that person being his co-worker, your husband.

Parts: Part 2 / Part 3

Words: 1.6k

Miguel hated when people were ungrateful it got him upset, and today, he was upset at his co-worker, your husband. You and Miguel met at an Alchemax event. You were alone but held confidence, and when he got to know you, he was surprised, to say the least.

How did someone like your husband end up with some like yourself? You were both complete opposites. You looked well built, confident, a little intimidating, sure but kind no the less. As for your husband, well, he was a chum he was well built like yourself, but his attitude was distasteful, just like a lot of the other jerks that worked here, and as you both talked through the event he got to learn more about you.

(Flashback)

"Can I ask a question?" Miguel said hesitantly.

"Sure," you smiled at him.

"How did you and C/W/N meet? I mean, you don't have to tell me. I'm just curious."

"No, it's fine. we went to the same college together, and I know it might sound touché but we pledged the same frat house."

"Mm, sorry for asking. It's just that you're both so-."

"Different," you finished for him "Yeah he wasn't always like this. We have our good days and bad days like any other couple he's a good guy to me for the most part of it. I guess I just need to try harder," you said, turning to look at your husband he was chatting with a woman.

Miguel could only remember your face that day. You look a little sad, and the more he got to see the way your husband treated you, the more it made him mad for you. You were a catch, at least that's what Miguel thought you often brought your husband lunch, which he usually gave away or through it out in the garbage.

According to Miguel, he felt lucky to try your food after his co-worker offered him the lunch you made for him and fuck was it good.

"Miguel, do you want it? I was gonna through it out but might as well ask."

He started at the lunch box in front of him, "Sure."

"Cool, just give me the box afterward. My husband tends to over due it on lunches." He said, walking away.

When Miguel opened the box, he was impressed the food smelled good, and there was clearly a lot of dedication and love put into it. He picked up the note that was on top of one of the tupperware.

*Love you so much C/W/N I have a late shift today at the station, so I might take a while to get home ill see you later maybe if your up to it we can go to the gym when I return or watch something anyways love you have a good day at work - ❤️❤️❤️ *

Miguel placed the small note to the side, re-reading it periodically while he finished the lunch you prepared.

"Here it was amazing." Miguel said, handing the lunch box back.

"Oh, that's good."

"He also left you this," he said, grabbing the note from his pocket.

"Can you through it for me? I have somewhere to be right now," he said, walking away with the lunch box in hand.

He didn't through it he kept it in a small drawer even though it wasn't for him. The note was sweet he often day dreamed of you bringing him lunch instead of C/W/N. Wait, day dreamed what was he thinking you were a married man and taken he can't be think of you this way but he was as the day went by he often got to eat your prepared lunches keeping the notes you left inside.

The part that made him get annoyed with your husband was when he was bragging about you to his colleagues.

"So wait, he just does whatever you want?"

"Meh, sometimes if I ask for something like massages, he does it, but things like sex are rarer. He is not bad, both top and bottom, but doesn't mean I can't have some side action, " your husband said while the other laughed.

"He's such a stupid guy," one of the colleagues said while they continued to laugh.

Miguel only reacted when he felt the ink in his pen start to spread in his hand, cleaning himself up before it tried.

One day, Miguel bumped into you in the grocery story, and gosh, you looked amazing. You were wearing your cop uniform as you recognized him.

"Hey Miguel, right?" you said, extending your hand out to him.

"Yeah, nice to see you again. How are you?"

"I'm good for the most part. I just got out of a shift, so I'm free for today. I was gonna spend time with C/W/N, but he went out with a friend, but anyways, what about you."

"I've been here and there, nothing much really."

"Mm I- I was gonna get ice cream your welcome to join me if you want."

"Sure, but I'll probably have to leave. I've been really tired this past week." He said walk with you to the cash register bags in hand.

"That's fine. Everyone needs a break sometimes. You look tense. Maybe you should go to a chiropractor sometime it could help."

"Never thought about it."

"Come to my place. I'll give you a massage."

"I wouldn't want to intrude. You're probably gonna be busy later."

"No, I insist I'm basically free this weekend, and C/W/N is gone to. It'll be nice to have a friend around, " you said, smiling at him.

"Okay," he signed out. "At what time I don't mind going after we get ice cream, but I'll need to leave my bags at my house."

"That's fine, how about 6 pm."

"Sounds good," he said as you parted away to get to your cars.

After that day you and miguel became good friends often going to the gym togther since your partner didn't want to go but not only that, somewhere within Miguel, jealousy sprouted, he was jealous of what his co-worker had.

Your place was homey and comfy after the massage you made dinner, and it was amazing, but he also felt pain knowing he didn't have this someone who would treat him like this someone to look forward to. You were amazing, and you deserved better.

It took a couple of months, but one day, you invited Miguel over he was oblivious to what he was gonna walk into as he made his way over to your door and knocked. No answer.

He thought you forgot and started walking away till he heard something fall quickly going back to the door and opening it with force he walked in on you on the floor with blood on seeping from your head as your husband had a belt he landed a whip but before he could do it again Miguel stopped him.

"Calm down," he said, raistraining your husband.

"What the fuck are you doing in my house." He said struggling to get out. Miguel let him go and went to aid you. we have to get him to a hospital, and he'll need stitches.

"Do whatever you want." Your husband said, leaving.

Miguel visited often in the hospital his co-working was bo where to be seen for the past couple of days, and a police report was made for what he did to you.

"Hey," Miguel said, entering your room.

"Hi," you replied. "How has work been?" you asked.

"Good, nothing exciting," he said, taking a seat.

"I caught him," you said, looking forward while your head rested. "He was cheating on me. I started the divorce process. it's my fault." You said he could hear the quiver in your voice and the way your eyes filled with tears.

"It wasn't your fault" Miguel didn't know what to say he didn't know what to do either right now he just felt sympathy for you how a big strong and confident guy like you looks so valuable.

"Wasn't it if I wasn't a bad husband if I was good enough, maybe-"

"You aren't." You were cut off by Miguel. "M/N, I know we only know each other for about what half a year, and in that time, you were the most caring husband I've ever met hell alot of the other spouses don't do what you do." He said, placing his hand on your thigh.

"I know this is a bad moment, but if I'm being honest, I- I was jealous of C/W/N after the event I paid more attention to him, and you. He gave me your lunches. I was gonna tell you about it but I didn't know how. I would read the notes you left him they were cute and sweet." He said, looking down.

You stared at him, and you didn't know what to say.

He took a deep breath. "What I'm trying to say is you deserve better, and I want to be the one to prove to you that I know it too soon." He said getting up.

"All I ask is that when you're ready, give me a chance." He said, walking away with his head down.

"Stay," you said, stopping him from leaving. "It gets lonely here without someone."

"Are you sure I would want to intrude."

"It's nice to have a friend around," you said, scooting over a bit and patting the spot next to you in bed.

This is it. Miguel smiled at you as he walked over and got in bed . He tucked his head under your chin and rested.

"You know you were basically my personal Spiderman," you said, looking down at him.

"Maybe I am," he said, staring at you.

"Well, in that case, you need to wear the suit more often," you said, laughing to yourself.

"Miguel, I'll give you a chance, but I want to move slowly very slowly."

"I'll wait for along as it takes." And with that, you both feel asleep holding each other close, Miguel resting his head on your pecs.

[gremlinmodetweeker]

König is Naturally Nerd!König

A lot of people suggest nerd!König (which is essentially regular König in my books) would be into DnD, or Star Wars, or Lego, but I disagree.

Normal and Nerd!König are obsessed with miniature armies. He has little models of airplanes and tanks that he puts on display in his room. He only has two World War models (and even then it's WW1), and those are the planes that Baron von Richthofen flew. Otherwise, he collects medieval minis and paints them.

He creates whole dioramas of them, and they're surprisingly good. He has the money to sink into his hobby, and it fills his time when he's not at work. He fidgets a lot, but he's gotten good at doing fine detail work. They're not award winning, but they're really quite good.

In addition, he's a major reader. If you want to know more about what König reads, check out this post here. If you don't want to read it, the gist of it is that König loves reading and reads all the time. He's probably the type to sniff and say the book was better than the movie. He's right, but he doesn't need to be so snobby about it.

Through the military, he has an extensive knife and gun collection. He can use all of them, sure, but he really doesn't need that many. He used to have only one room dedicated to them, but he's since had to move twice and torn down a wall most recently to make a big enough room for everything. He kinda sucks that way. He really takes up a lot of space.

However, Nerd!König didn't end up joining the military. He instead went into nuclear engineering and earned an excellent living to fund his expensive hobbies. He also ended up having more time to devote to his crafts, which led to...

More under the cut.

Nerd!König is a Snob

König is a pathfinder 2e type of guy. He's that pedantic. He'll have the rule books memorized, and he has links to download the pdfs ready at the flick of a wrist. He's ready to convert you. Your DnD supplies will be absorbed into his Pathfinder 2E.

A big reason he's into Pathfinder 2E is because he was introduced at a young age and so collected the supplies, but when he heard about the Wizards of the Coast scandals he decided he'd use that as his reasoning. He gets up on a soapbox about it whenever he can. He really, really hates Wizards of the Coast. It's a firey rage that burns within.

He also likes Warhammer. He's a disgusting Warhammer lover. He plays a ridiculous Adeptus Mechanicus army that he's painted himself. It's surprisingly good painting, too. Having painted Adeptus Mech before, I'm telling you it's really hard. He makes it looks easy with craft paint and crazy glue. He's disgustingly good at it. I hate him for it. How dare he be so good. He is genuinely a fantastic painter. That said, we saw what happened with the last Austrian painter, so maybe it's a good thing he stuck to painting minis.

Nerd!König also loves to collect ancient weaponry. To make it worse, he actually practises with it and has become pretty decent with it. He's feared among the LARPing community because he's known to be a fearsome competitor. He'd be more well liked if he didn't accidentally break people's wooden shields so often. As it is, he's not fully blacklisted, but he's skating on thin ice. He'd be banned for sure if it weren't for the fact that the forest on his property is amazing for LARPing.

Finally, he's into Renaissance fairs. He goes and does public sword fighting, once again, LARPing. He'll also show off his weaponry collections, and will gladly go on hour long spiels to anyone unfortunate to ask about the history of an item on his table. He is on good terms with the blacksmiths, and he's always having to pay the local seamstress to fix his clothing back in the traditional style. He will also go up to the ferret keeper and play with their ferrets, and then beg you to get some. He just wants a cute little ferret. Can't he have a couple? No, not one! They need playmates. You need at least three.

Either way, Nerd!König is a big silly guy. He's a bit friendlier and gentler than regular König honestly. He also is super passionate about his hobbies. He's so excited to show you his hobbies, and he really wants you to enjoy them too.

Just so you know, all these hobbies are expensive. Very expensive. It's a good thing he's making so much money, because otherwise you'd go bankrupt overnight, because, "Games Workshop released a new edition of the walkers! I need them for my army!"

[aidaronan]

Welcome to the Lube Chute!

Some We're-A-Package-Deal Summer Job Stobin crack, dedicated to @griefabyss69. Also shout out to @wynnyfryd who said the Lube Chute sounded like the location of Stobin's next fail summer job after Family Video got destroyed. "No, I'm telling you, Steve. We have to say it every time."

"We have to say, 'Welcome to the Lube Chute, where our main goal is fillin' all your holes,' every time?"

"Every time." Robin shrugged her shoulders. "It's the whole 'ocean of flavor' thing all over again." She'd started at the Lube Chute a week before him, owing to his need to hover over Eddie while his body knitted itself back together. By the time Steve had decided Eddie could get to the fridge and the bathroom on his own, she had been deemed competent enough to show him the register and inventory procedures.

"Yeah, except 'ocean of flavor' was about ice cream," Steve said. "And this is about, you know, rubber dicks."

"That's the way of stupid retail, huh." Robin sighed dramatically and hopped upon the counter. Next to her sat an open box of flavored lubes. She picked up a pricing gun and started affixing them with stickers.

A few minutes later, the door dinged with the sound of someone pushing their way into the shop. A regular-looking latino man in jeans and a faded Zeppelin tee stepped into the shop.

Steve gave Robin a pleading look, and she pulled her lips thin in sympathy and mouthed, "sorry, your turn." God. Welp. He may as well rip off the Band-Aid.

"Welcome to the Lube Chute," Steve said flatly, "where our goal is fillin' holes."

The guy snorted softly and went on his way, moving toward a rack of adult video tapes. Meanwhile, Robin kept her head down, looking pointedly to where she'd slapped a $.3.99 label onto a bottle of Maxxx Slick Strawberry.

"Like obviously I don't care," she said. "But it is 'where our main goal is fillin' all your holes.'"

"Ugh." Steve rolled his eyes up at the ceiling. "Why is it, like, so long?"

Curling his chin back around, he found the customer at the counter holding Dr. Lovesmuscles's Foot Long Schlong. The customer looked between it and Steve before raising his eyebrows. Shit and fuck. For the first time in literally ever, Steve wished he was back in those tiny Scoops shorts.

"I wasn't... I didn't mean the... I..." Steve stared at the guy over the counter and then gave up on trying to explain, punching things into the register as fast as he could so he could end the interaction. "So for the video and the toy, that comes to $18.39 with tax."

Steve made made change for a $20, put the guy's things into a nondescript brown paper bag, and then bit back a groan when he realized he had to embarrass himself one more time before it was all over.

"Thank you for visiting the Lube Chute. Remember if the base ain't flared, it doesn't go up there. Have a nice day!"

Next to him, Robin coughed into her elbow. When Steve looked over, he found her reading the back of one of the lube bottles, this one watermelon flavored.

"What do you think potassium sorbate even is?" Robin asked. "I mean, I know what potassium is. I passed chem and got into college—go Wildcats. Just... potassium sorbate. What does it even do?"

Steve stared at her for a long moment and then snatched the pricing gun from her hand. #

It was late July. August loomed and with it so did the end of possibly their last summer job together. After this, they were both slated to leave Hawkins. Robin to Northwestern, Steve to Chicago to be near her (and because it made sense as a base for Eddie to work on growing his music career.)

On this particular Wednesday, they had a huge shipment of video tapes to go through. Other than the scantily clad and sometimes fully nude women on the covers, it felt a lot like being back at Family Video. They quickly priced and stocked the tapes that were for sale, and then they worked on storing the covers for the rentals and putting them in the rental cases and then into the system.

"God, Steve, I am just, like, so gay," Robin whispered under her breath for the fifth or sixth time as she stared wide-eyed at a VHS cover. On it, a redheaded woman stared into the camera, her breasts exposed, her hand disappearing down the front of her very thin white panties. "You do know you can just, like, check one of these out, right?" Steve asked. "You're an adult. No one would—" Steve cut himself off when the bell over the door jingled. Jumping at the sound, Robin almost dropped the tape, fumbling with it several times before Steve snatched it from the air and handed it back to her. She was blushing hard when she went to put it into the computer.

One crisis averted, Steve turned toward the door to find one of the owners coming in. Shit.

Steve had slacked off on the welcome and goodbye phrases over the course of the summer because, well, he didn't want to say them. And now he wasn't sure he even remembered them properly. Shit, shit, shit.

He smiled and nodded as the owner approached the counter. Stephanie was a sleek, blonde woman who looked nothing like the kind of person you might expect to own a sex shop.

"Order come in okay?" she asked.

"Oh, uh, one damaged tape so far," Steve said. "Definitely an improvement over the last order."

'If the base is too...' No, that wasn't it.

"Love to hear that since I spent 3 hours yelling at the distributor after that incident."

'Where we fill holes for...' Definitely not.

"Yeah, right, sucked for us too beca—" Steve froze as a customer walked into the shop. He looked over at Robin, hoping to catch her eyes for a save, but she was laser-focused on sorting another box of tapes into alphabetical order for processing.

Fuck. Steve smiled at the incoming customer. Okay, he could do this. Deep breath, winning smile. "Welcome to the Lube Chute, where our main goal is fillin' all your holes."

Robin inhaled a deep gasp right around the same time that Stephanie burst into raucous laughter, throwing her head back and exposing her slender throat. In another life where he wasn't already tits over ass for Eddie Munson, he would've had to fall a little in love with her.

"Oh my God, that is too good." Stephanie wiped tears form her eyes with her thumbs and then giggled a few more times. "Jesus, Steve. Did you come up with that on your own?"

"Wha—?" Steve snapped his eyes over to Robin, who had her teeth set in grimace that would have been comedic at any other time. Shoulders pulled up around her ears, her eyes bled with apology.

Steve clenched his jaw and turned back to Stephanie, slipping into the most suave persona he could muster under those conditions. "Oh, you know, just thought you'd get a kick out of it."

"Well, you were right about that." Stephanie shook her head and grabbed the money bag to take it to the bank. "'Fillin' holes!" She laughed again on her way out the door.

Steve watched like a hawk as her car pulled out of the parking lot and then rounded on Robin, voice low as the customer browsed the "New Videos!" display.

"You told me we HAD to say..."

"Oh my God, I was gonna tell you after, like, a week, but then you stopped doing it on your own, so I just kinda..." Robin made a wobbly gesture with both hands, and Steve sighed deeply.

"You're walking home today," he said, but they both knew he didn't mean it, especially when his lunch break rolled around and he saved her half his orange as usual. # It was still July, and they could see the customer approaching from the parking lot. "Steve," Robin said. "Steve, please." "I want to point out that it's your own fault that you have to do this now, officially, as part of company policy. Because Stephanie liked it so much." "Steve, but..." Steve jutted his hip out against the counter and crossed his arms, waiting. With the same put-upon sigh he'd grown used to at Scoops and Family Video, Robin drew herself up taller and slapped her hands down on either side of the register. Through the front door, a fat woman with curly brown hair stepped into the shop. Robin beamed at her. "Welcome to the Lube Chute! Where our main goal is fillin' all your holes."

[puppy-phum]

Pit Babe Characters x Cartomancy ➣ Part 4: Kenta & Kim

Jack of Diamonds: Focuses on fulfilling his duty. Hard to change; in both mind and heart. Seven of Clubs: Standing up for what is right. Going against the current and making a difference.

for @pitbabeanniversary week 4 prompts: kenta & kim

(more thoughts under the cut!)

disclaimer: i am not an expert in either cartomancy or tarot reading. i did a lot of research on these two sites to come up with these cards for the characters. some of the meanings associated with the cards are still only my own interpretation, so they might not be completely accurate.

i'm quite amused by the fact that kenta and kim ended up with cards that are opposites of each other: other one is bound to oneself while the other connects more to people around (or above) them. yet in their differences, they're also quite similar – two sides of the same coin, i might say.

kenta: jack of diamonds is an ironic choice for kenta, i have to admit that. in general, diamonds are connected – amongst other things – to wealth, possessions, and independence. ironically, kenta lacks all of these things. he isn't rich on anything, doesn't own anything. not even his own self belongs to him bc he gave up his mind and body a long time ago (and his heart? i think it died throughout his childhood as he became the weapon tony needed him to be. tho others might say it's only buried deep and is still beating despite, or in spite, of it all).

but the jack of diamonds as one of the diamond cards isn't really about money or property. it's about loyalty and devotion, about striving for perfection and fulfilling your duty. a jack of diamonds is a hard worker, dedicated to a fault, stubborn as a mule, and so very hard to change bc of that. making them come around and change their mind is frustrating bc they don't want to admit they're wrong. and well, kenta might be aware of the fact that what he's doing is wrong, but. what other purpose does he have? he owes this much to his "father" (read: owner). the abuse disguised as love might be painful to take at times but does he really deserve anything more? ("yes," answer pete and kim, vehemently, above everyone else. "no," whispers kenta's own mind, black with tony's poison.)

kim: where kenta avoids change and doesn't believe he's capable of making things better for others bc he's simply not that strong, kim is the opposite. he has clear principles and he's unwilling to give those up for anything. he cannot stand watching what tony is doing after learning about his crimes. he stands up for justice, for the mistreated children under tony's care, for his career and talent, and most of all, for himself. he will not bend into anyone's will – hell, he'd rather die than let that happen as he proves by comforting tony in his own home about his misdeeds which really requires some huge balls from this guy. (sorry kim, i might love you but what were you even thinking???)

seven of clubs is a card that is about taking a stance and going against something you find wrong. it is about resistance bc you're so convinced that what you think or do is the right thing. it is about change – about forcing change to happen bc things cannot continue the way they are. and this is all truly what kim represents: conviction, sense of justice, and believing in your own capability and skills. some might see him a bit arrogant, too, but i think it's one of his best qualities that he's confident and knows exactly where he stands, what he wants, and what he deserves.

as a couple, i've already said it: kenta and kim are two sides of the same coin. that's what makes them clash but also work together. kim questions why kenta is doing what he is doing while also showing how strong he can be when he believes in himself and his principles. that affects kenta enough to make him break out of his cage – slowly, one broken rule at a time, but still. eventually, he picks up that knife and kills the final beast. he is free or left adrift, i don't really know. but at least, he's found another duty and has accepted change as the necessary evil. no more hurting innocents. something can be stronger than tony (other ppl's devotion to each other, perhaps? kenta isn't sure but i hope he figures it out.)

(an additional note of this edit: i think it's fitting that kenta's pic is more on the dark side, while kim's is brighter/has brighter yellow tones. kenta is the shadow while kim is the light etc. etc. you know what i mean)