#so I went ‘it’s because he’s a turtle isn’t it’ /j

[sprite-writes-fanfic]

When the ‘03 Turtles are in love!

🐢💙❤️2003 TMNT x Reader💜🧡🐢

Word Count: 889

CW: Gender-neutral reader as always, referred to as ‘you’, my underrated beloveds ong, (especially Donnie 💜), nothing but fluff! Turtles realizing they’re in love with you and how they act around you!! (+ confessions because yes <3)

🐢💙Leonardo💙🐢

💙 With Leo, it takes him a good while to realize he’s in love with you. It just randomly hits him when he’s meditating, the comfort you bring, the way he can lean on you, the way he’s always seemingly drawn to you! It hits him like a bus.

💙 He gets a little shy and distant with you, but don’t give up! Continue coming to him and acting like yourself, he’ll feel a bit guilty for avoiding you, but you still coming to him makes his heart flips and he’s feeling those butterflies.

💙 That’s when Leo can’t take it anymore and finally confides in Master Splinter, (which we both know that man knows when his sons are in love). Splinter is pleasantly surprised! But he’s happy to help his son sort out his feelings and even devise ways to confess to you.

💙 Finally, Leo works up the courage and asks you to go to the training dojo with him alone, to train. You two do train and by the end of it, Leo finally spills it, confessing his love to you, but also expressing his understanding if you didn’t feel the same.

💙 Pleasantly surprised when you admit to feeling the same way! Man is fist-pumping the air mentally when you confess. After that, you two spent more time together in the dojo, just talking things out and making it official with a hug, (a kiss will come later, Leo’s not ready to make that quick of a step!)

🐢❤️Raphael❤️🐢

❤️ With this emotional turtle, Raph is quick to realize, unlike his brothers, and at first; he’s frustrated. He didn’t NEED feelings, especially not towards a family friend, a human… A very beautiful human at that—

❤️ Okay, he gives up and comes to terms with the fact, Raph, the tough guy with anger issues, has soft feelings for YOU. (Bro went through the 5 stages of grief because of this/j)

❤️ And after coming to that conclusion, man is always trying to impress you, he gets closer to you, wants you to depend on him because he wants to be that someone for you! It strokes his ego quite a bit too.

❤️ It’s when he finally realizes he wants to be with you he shoots his shot. What’s the worst they could say? No? So, one night when you join him on patrol and you two are chilling on a roof, he finally confesses. And he’s straight to the point like, “Look uh, this is gonna sound weird, but I have feelings for you.”

❤️ Dude is so hyped when you say you feel the same way too. Raph isn’t the type to wait around either like Leo, on that rooftop was where you two shared (his) your first kiss.

🐢💜Donatello💜🐢

💜 When Donnie realizes, he panics a little actually. YOU are his best friend, and he’s completely shocked when he realizes that his heart thunders in his chest and his palms get sweaty when YOU are around, (*slow fade-in of the demi-romantic flag*).

💜 He tries to shut down these feelings as best as he can by working on his technology more and being distant with everyone, and I mean EVERYONE.

💜 Even then he can’t stay away for too long, he’s back to ranting and rambling about his inventions to you, and his breath hitches whenever you smile at and tell him, “Go on”, whenever he pauses and apologizes for rambling again.

💜 Donnie has to tell you, if he gets rejected now, hopefully these feelings will go away, right? He didn’t even consider the fact that you could possibly like him back, according to his statistics, the likelihood of a mutant and a human together is low!

💜 Well, when he sat you down for a serious conversation, going on to admit his feelings and saying he wouldn’t be hurt if you said no— Wait what? You were quick to interrupt him and tell him you liked him back?? He had to process a moment before he would shyly ask if you wanted to go for a small ride in the Battle Shell around town. (You two held hands while he drove. <3)

🐢🧡Michelangelo🧡🐢

🧡 Woof, Mikey on the other hand is a bit of a wild card, at first he confuses platonic with romance, but when his brothers point out to him the obvious, he’s all for it!

🧡 Mikey is the type to start reading comics and watch movies that involve romance so he has an idea of what to do, (and yes, he kicks his feet all giddy-like when he’s doing this).

🧡 After he’s obtained his knowledge, he’s quick to try and impress you and reenact some moments from the movies he’s watched, always saying quotes you probably wouldn’t understand. And when you don’t get it at first, thinking he’s just being Mikey, he’s a little bummed…

🧡 Then Raph has to point it out to him why his advances aren’t working, because he’s not really acting any different, and just tells Mikey to grow a pair and to tell you honestly. And that’s when Mikey’s new plan is sent into action, operation confession is a go!

🧡 Still a little confusing because he’s still making references but he’s got the spirit. Eventually he ends up forgetting the movie references and out-right tells you. And it’s safe to say, you guys have a roof-top date coming up here soon.

Gaaah, I’ve been obsessing over TMNT good lord. I wanted to write about them, and I’ll probably write more about them too 😭💙 Love turtle pookies ong, hope you enjoyed, and yes I posted the same day, I am motivated to write. ✍️

[tmntstorycomp]

A Coming Out Story?

An old pride piece that was a discord server exclusive for our pride event lol

Massy stared at the rainbow flags that were thrown across the floor, but mixed within them? A plethora of various other identities. He pulled his legs up onto the couch, leaning against the arm with a huff as he narrowed his gaze. 

It was that time of year again. When Leo would throw his flags everywhere and declare it was Pride month again. And Massy hated it. 

Everyone had a set identity, everyone knew who they were. And in a way, Massy felt like he was supposed to know as well. 

With a huff, his face became half buried within his crossed arms. He kicked a flag off of the couch, but his gaze shifted when a large green hand caught it. 

“Hey, you watch out where you’re kicking stuff. Leo will throw a fit if you’re caught disrespecting the trans flag,” Raph laughed, carefully setting the flag down on the coffee table. 

“Who cares what Nardo believes? If he didn’t want things getting stepped on, or broken, he wouldn’t have left them laying around the floor like this. Honestly, it’s almost more disrespectful.” Donnie spoke as they walked past Raph, tapping away at their screen. Massy had half a mind to ask what Donnie was up to, to distract himself from the mess that is the living room.

But he caught sight of the two magnets attached to the metal shell that the softshell wore and he kept his mouth shut. A white, purple, and gray flag with a black triangle was mounted right above one that was purely yellow, white, purple, and black. 

“Come on, Donnie. You know Leo is just excited.” Raph elbowed his brother lightly, causing the nerdy one to scoff. 

“I would prefer his excitement-”

“What about my excitement?” 

A portal opened and Leo came through it, dumping another box of flags onto the floor with a big grin. This time, it was purely green and blue flags. Massy remembered them distinctly as the MLM flag. Leo claimed that it was the best one, Massy wasn’t so sure. 

“I think you’re making a mess of our home,” Donnie bit out. 

“And I think someone isn’t in the pride spirit.” Leo teased as he plucked up a rainbow flag from the ground and tucked it against Donnie’s goggles as the purple turtle glared at him. 

“You have thirty seconds to run before this becomes a hate crime.”

Leo’s eyes went wide, but his grin only seemed to grow as he turned on his heel and sped out of the living room. Donnie watched their phone, counting down the seconds before they chased after him. This left Massy with the largest turtle.

“.. You look sad, Mass. What’s going on?” Raph asked as he moved to sit on the couch next to the boy. 

Massy huffed, tapping against the fabric of the couch before he sat up, moving to face the large snapper. 

“Everyone has themselves figured out. They get to celebrate who they are and be happy about it. And I’m not.” Massy complained, glancing back down at the array of flags that seemed to stare at him like starter pokemon. 

“Oh! Well.. Maybe you should start with identifying what you like? I mean.. Do you like girls?” Raph asked. 

And Massy paused, because that was a loaded question. He thought girls can be pretty, and certainly he has found himself swooning over some of the female characters in cartoons he watched as a kid, but he wasn’t sure. So, he answered with a shrug. 

“Okay.. Do you like boys?”

And again, the same response. He didn’t know. He certainly wasn’t opposed to boys. He saw a lot of attractive males in the world. But he didn’t know. 

“This is.. Tougher than I thought.” Raph admitted, laughing awkwardly as Massy’s eyes narrowed in on him. 

“Maybe you’re bisexual? Or pansexual? I mean, if you kind of like both boys and girls, surely you would be in one of those categories?” Raph offered, and Massy mulled them over for a bit. 

He knew what they meant. Though he would admit, the difference between the two was still confusing in his mind. But… Maybe he was? Afterall, he didn’t have a particular interest in either gender. Just.. Interest. So.. Bi/Pan Massy. That was the answer. It had to be… But if it were, why did it still feel so off. 

“I’m not sure that’s-”

A loud crash came from the kitchen and Raph was on his feet in a moment, making his way over to the doorway to peer inside. Massy hopped up, following the large turtle. He managed to squeeze his way past Raph in order to see what had happened. 

An entire shelf had been knocked over in some kind of struggle, Leonardo was soaked from head to toe. Donnie had him pinned down to the tile with the rainbow flag stick being jabbed into the knot on Leo’s mask. 

“Stop! That one doesn’t fit my aesthetic!” Leo shouted, but Donnie just kept at it. 

“Donnie! Come on, get off him,” Raph instructed as he made his way over. He grabbed Donnie by the shell and hauled them up. But Donnie’s hands gripped Leo’s mask and pulled the slider up as well. 

“Hey! Won’t you- Oh hey, squirt,” 

Leo seemed to focus in on Massy standing in the doorway. The preteen started to laugh, watching the awkward display that the older turtles had found themselves in. Leo reached up and pinched Donnie’s hand, who released their grasp with a squawk. 

“Leo, come help me clean this up!” Donnie shouted, but Leo rolled out of Raph’s grasp and scooped Massy up into his arms. 

“Sorry, gentleman. I have favorite duties to attend to.” Leo spoke, sticking his tongue out. Massy laughed more, laying his head on Leo’s shoulder as the hero made his way to the dojo. 

Massy seemed to perk up more, he always enjoyed watching Leo train. He wanted to be a ninja too, but he was always told he was too young. It felt ridiculous, especially knowing that he was currently the same age Mikey was when he started fighting. 

But as they made it to the dojo, Leo set Massy down on one of the mats and moved to sit next to him. The slider sat cross legged, hands folded in his lap as his eyes closed and-

“Nooo, wait. Meditating is so lame, come on, slice something,” Massy complained, falling dramatically back onto the mat. 

Leo laughed, peeking one eye open to look down at Massy.

“Meditating is an excellent way to find yourself, troublemaker. It centers you, keeps you focused. I would argue that it’s actually the coolest form of training that we were taught by our father.” Leo noted, straightening his back some. 

“You’re just feeling lazy,”

“That’s irrelevant.”

Massy huffed, moving to sit cross legged next to Leo, hands folded in his own lap. He looked over Leo for just a moment before letting his eyes close as well. 

But he didn’t see anything. No, he had no idea how to find himself. He had no idea where he was. Everything still felt like a confusing whirlpool of different words and phrases that didn’t feel right at all. 

But maybe starting out with sexuality wasn’t the best way to start. Afterall, how can you determine who you like if you don’t even know who you are yet?

“.. How did you know you were trans?” Massy asked the quiet of the room. 

“Mostly clerical error,” 

“Leo..”

“Okay! Okay. It just.. Is a feeling. You feel a certain way in your heart and sometimes it matches your sex and sometimes it doesn’t. For me, it didn’t match. I do not match biology.. But I am still me. And there is nothing that is going to change me.” Leo explained. 

Massy opened his eyes to find the older turtle smiling down at him. Massy tries to examine himself in that light. 

“I.. Don’t know if I match.” Massy responded. His body wasn’t particularly uncomfortable, not in the way he knew Leo to complain sometimes. But, it did feel like he was struggling to fit into it. Pieces didn’t always line up in his puzzle. Like he was trying to fit two separate pictures together. It just.. Didn’t seem to make sense to him. 

Leo grinned, lightly smacking the kid on the shell before pulling out the all too familiar blue, pink, and white flag. Massy let the flag fall into his hands and he stared at it, eyebrows coming together. 

“Then congratulations, you’re trans,” Leo spoke definitively before pulling out his sword and swinging a circle around Massy. “Now get out of here, you’re disturbing my meditation,” 

Leo’s laugh echoed as Massy fell through the portal and the kid tucked himself into his shell. He tumbled against a hard floor, skidding against it for a moment before poking his head back out. Everything was purple and dark, leading Massy to know exactly where he had landed. 

He pushed himself up to his feet and stared at the flag still in his hands. Definition wise, Leo had to be right. If he wasn’t cis, he was trans. In some way, shape or form, because he didn’t identify fully with being a boy. Right? Right??? Massy didn’t know. And he dropped the flag to the floor as he started to walk his way to where he could hear the clacking of a keyboard and angered mumblings. 

“This is why I hate this month, there is no such thing as subtlety anymore…” Donnie muttered from their spot in their chair, lounged back and glaring at their large screen. 

Massy paused for a moment, but then glanced back at the flag that was almost consumed by darkness. He should pick it up, lest Leo get blamed for something he didn’t do. 

“Masaccio, I see you’ve been deposited in my lair,”

Massy turned back to Donnie but the purple turtle’s eyes were still glued to the screen. Massy forwent the flag and made his way over to the desk, grabbing the smaller chair that he had helped design personally for himself.

“Leo said I was ruining his focus,”

“Ha. That’s rich. I don’t believe that he’s focused ever a day in his life.” Donnie mocked before finally tearing their eyes from the screen to lock onto Massy. 

“Is there anything you need my help with?”

Massy stared at him for a long moment, rocking in the chair before he nodded his head. Donnie’s eyebrows shot up for a moment but they turned themselves to face Massy, gesturing for him to continue. 

“.. I don’t know who I am. I don’t know who I like, I don’t even know if I actually like people,” Massy rambled out, crossing his arms over his chest. And Donnie seemed mostly uninterested with the concept at hand. 

“Sexuality is.. Complicated. But for the most part, irrelevant. You will find someone you want to click with. I mean, look at me. I don’t find many people fascinating. But, I have had a very select number of partners. Maybe, you just want to connect with someone before you like them. There’s no shame in being demi.” Donnie instructed, holding one of their fingers up. 

“So.. I could just like people I’m attached to?” Massy asked, cocking his head to the side. 

“Absolutely! After all, isn’t that what any relationship is? You don’t particularly care for anyone, but then you get to know them and they become important to you. That’s how that works.” Donnie waved their hand around, and Massy extended his legs out to rest them on Donnie’s armchair. 

“Is.. Is that your stance on gender too?” Massy asked.

“For the most part? Yeah. Obviously, every being is different and one’s gender won’t fit the mold for other people’s gender. It’s statistically impossible. But, at the end of the day, being one hundred percent masculine or feminine is.. Not possible. You can definitely lean, and most people do. That’s how you form the gender binary. But it’s a scale between the two ends and sometimes you find yourself not even on the scale. I actually made this chart that describes gender as more a plane than a spectrum if you want to see-”

“No thanks! I uh.. I think I get the picture,” Massy cut them off as he pulled his legs back and moved to stand up from his chair. The young turtle quickly pushed his chair in, starting to walk away from the genius with his head still spiraling. 

“Sure! Just leave before I can go on my detailed exploration of gender and society!” Donnie called after the younger turtle. 

Massy just picked up his pace, starting the trek back to his room to attempt to process all that he just learned in such a short timespan. His hands came up to his head as if that would stabilize anything, but it wasn’t much help. 

“Hey Massy- Massy?”

Massy kept walking to his room, not caring much that Mikey had just gotten home and was on his heel. 

“Hey, kid, what’s going on with you?” Mikey asked, but their voice was laced with far more concern than it was joy. Massy whined as he collapsed onto his bed, grabbing his blanket to wrap himself up with. 

Mikey was instantly concerned as he moved closer to sit on Massy’s bed. 

“Come here, kiddo. Tell me all about it,” Mikey offered, holding his arms out. Massy peeked out from his blanket hiding spot, tears already filling his eyes. But he moved quickly, pressing himself into Mikey’s side and letting the orange turtle’s arms wrap around him. 

“What’s wrong, hun? Did something happen?” Mikey asked.

“I.. I tried to figure myself out so I could actually participate in pride this year. You guys have so much fun and I.. I just don’t know myself. I want to know myself but I don’t. Raph says that I’m likely bisexual or pansexual because I don’t have a preference between genders. Leo says that I’m trans because I don’t feel like my sex matches me fully. Donnie says that I could be demisexual if I don’t have a preference but then he also said that gender is-”

“Gender is a plane?”

“YES! And now I don’t know! Because nothing feels right, but nothing…” Massy chokes on his tears for a moment, pressing his face into Mikey’s plastron as the older turtle rubs his shell. 

“Oh, baby.. It doesn’t matter what or who you are,” Mikey offers, pressing a light kiss to the top of Massy’s head. The darker turtle looks up at him, “How does it not?”

“Well, first of all, you’re thirteen. You aren’t supposed to know who you are yet. You haven’t lived enough yet. Sure, people figure themselves out at any age. But there is absolutely no shame in not knowing anything. You have an entire lifetime,” Mikey offered, wiping away Massy’s tears carefully with his thumb. 

“And? You may never know. You may just like what you like, feel how you feel. Labels are an easy way to describe and connect to others, but they aren’t required for you to feel prideful and proud of who you are. You are so many wonderful thing, Masaccio, you don’t have to put a label on it,” 

Massy stared up at Mikey and he nodded slowly, and finally, that felt right. 

“I don’t need a label,” Massy states, and his voice is filled with more confidence than it had been before. 

“You don’t need a label,” Mikey responds. 

Massy, filled with relief, turns to deadweight in Mikey’s arms. He huffed softly, cuddling into his side while Mikey kept rubbing his shell. 

“I would still enjoy a pride flag…” Massy muttered, which caused Mikey to laugh.

“Luckily, you have one,”

By the end of the day, Massy had his own little flag hanging in the living room with all the others. This one was lighter, but it was perfect. 

Green, white, blue, and orange. 

Massy felt it very fitting.

[nani-nonny]

Whispers of Distant Souls - Ch.13 Alternate Scene

So… I thought it’d be fun if I shared the alternate version of the F!turtles reuniting :).

But context, F!Leo originally wasn’t going to see his brothers kind of all at once. It was going to be gradual as the longer he stays with the present Hamatos, the better he would feel about his place within the family. As in feel a part of them rather than a bit of an outlier/outsider kind of ordeal. Although this would’ve been fun to write or witness, at this point I thought, “i made everyone wait long enough.” /j (and because the story went on a different route, that route being more ninpo involved)

So I rewrote the scene and threw the ghosty bros into the fray known as Ch.13. Anyways, in the original plan, F!Mikey was going to suddenly appear before F!Leo after the slider had recuperated/recovered from the whole Krang invasion fiasco. I think I’ve explained enough :) have fun reading this short snippet

vvvvvvvvvvv

Leonardo is seated in the middle of his room in a meditative position. His hands rest on his knees and his eyes are closed as he focuses on his surroundings. He listens to everything and nothing. Allowing himself to simply exist in this moment—in this timeline that he doesn’t belong to. And for this exact moment, it’s okay. It’s fine. He’s fine.

He’s allowed to be here. He is meant to be here. He gets his second chance—his one in a million.

But it’s so lonely without his brothers and sisters. So frighteningly lonely without his family by his side. There isn’t Draxum to scold him for not utilizing his mutant strengths to the best of his abilities as a superior life form. No Splinter to stop him from slouching and no Big Mama to call him turtley-boo. No Piebald to train silently with, no April to make stupid jokes, and no Cassandra to beat krang assholes to the ground with. No Donnie to bicker and tag-team with, no Raph to reassure him that everything is going to be fine, and… no Mikey to poke his cheek and tease him for growing a Raph-chasm.

For the first time in his life, he feels truly alone. And never had he ever felt so small.

He releases a heavy sigh that carries all his thoughts and loneliness. Then finally opens his eyes.

At first, he thinks he’s dreaming. Maybe he must have reached some nirvana state—that or he fell asleep. Either one works.

It would help explain why he’s seeing Mikey—his Mikey, Master of Mystic Arts and the strongest mystic warrior in the entire Resistance. Master Michelangelo Mikey. His little brother.

The mystic warrior is reflecting Leonardo’s meditative pose, hovering above the ground in front of the resistance leader. Michelangelo is covered in a familiar glow, the same glow that envelops their bodies when their ninpo activates. The box turtle’s ninpo is as warm and soothing as ever, emitting an orange light that calms Leonardo’s nerves.

Something in Leonardo pulses as if finally coming back to life. As if a missing gear within a machine has been found and fit into place. There are a few other missing pieces, but this is a start and the machine finally moves—breathes.

In a breathless whisper, Leonardo calls out to the mystic warrior, “Mikey…?”

Michelangelo’s eyes slowly open and a smile stretches onto his face when he sees Leonardo. “You didn’t finish meditating,” the warrior replies in a teasing tone.

Leonardo’s breath hitches and he can already feel the tears forming in his eyes. “Mikey…,” he mumbles.

Michelangelo leans forward to connect their foreheads which releases the comforting warmth of a miniature sun.

The machine’s gears are working fluidly, working in perfect tandem despite the missing pieces. It quickens the pace of Leonardo’s heart, rendering him almost breathless as he welcomes the feeling. It takes him a few seconds to recognize it, but he knows it. How could he ever completely forget about it? It’s the feeling when he’s connected with his brothers. It’s no machine but the Hamato Ninpo, his connection to his ancestors and his family. It’s the people he lost.

“How could you let yourself go like this, geez, Leo,” Michelangelo teased again as he lifts his head away from Leonardo, the connection weakening but still present.

Leonardo blinks and the tears finally fall, no amount of willpower could hold them back. Not when he no longer feels alone. He wipes his tear with his nonprosthetic hand and retorts, “Give me a break, Michel. It’s not everyday you see a ghost.”

Michelangelo snorts and says, “Ghost? I guess, but I’ve been here everyday. You just didn’t want to see me.”

Leonardo’s eyebrow raises, “‘Didn’t want to see you?’ I haven’t stopped thinking about you guys since I came here.”

Michelangelo’s hand mocks Leonardo by mimicking his mouth then says, “You kept ignoring us.”

“Ignoring you? Since when did I…,” Leonardo’s voice trails off as he connects the dots. The reason why he kept hearing those voices, the same voices that slowly became recognizable by the day but he couldn’t pinpoint exactly why. “That was you guys?”

“Uh, duh, Leo. Didn’t I tell you? ‘I’ll be closer than you think’,” Michelangelo retorts as he flips on his back but continues to hover in front of Leonardo.

“You knew… you knew this would happen. You knew you would… and that I’d be here,” Leonardo says as he connects the dots. He reaches for Michelangelo’s wrist, hoping to grab his little brother’s attention but the mystic warrior retreats his arm.

“Whoa, careful Leo! It took some time to manifest my ghost! Gram-Gram made it sound so easy but it’s so hard!” Michelangelo complains as he distanced himself from Leonardo.

“Mikey, did you know this would happen? Is that whh you said that before opening the portal?”

Michelangelo winces as he nods, “Surprise?”

“Mikey!”

[yorshie]

on the tmnt ask game thingy: gimme a 12 for uh. reasons……. and then a 24 bc i Gotta see the roast

Ooooo thank you for the ask! I was a little confused on the first one because I took it to mean either one turtle that you like every iteration or go down the line iteration by iteration….. I went with the second because I like to ramble, but I’ve only really watched the 90s movies, 2003, bayverse and rise enough to form an opinion or care. No hate on the others just. Shrug. Not my jam right now.

Funnily enough, when I watched 2003 as a kid (8-9 year old) Raph was my favorite. I was a…. Um…. Opinionated, angry kid, shall we say, and I liked that he had a motorcycle and could kick shell, as he often put it. I was a late bloomer in turns of puberty and thinking boys were anything other than cooty filled jerks, so I’m pretty sure my interest in him was platonic at that point (also I got like, hella good at hiding my favorites because I often got picked on for liking things/people growing up)

It wasn’t until I was an adult that I watched the other versions. 90s was definitely Donnie, the amount of chaotic energy there alone made him my favorite. I loved the intro fight in the second movie where he just straight up pretending to be an inflatable turtle.

Bayverse is my main jammy jam, the one that I consistently like to play with. I like all four of the turtles equally in this one *stares straight ahead with a poker face* there is definitely no favoritism going on at all *sweats* - lol. Well, maybe there is, but I go through spurts where I want to delve into different aspects of each of them at different times. There’s definitely an even number of WIPs featuring each on my computer

Rise is. Well. Rise is awesome, but I kinda stand outside the fence and peer over at that fandom. I’m sure everyone is aware that my favorites are the disaster twins in that iteration, but a lot of the fandom lore going around isn’t actually…. Canon? Which is wonderful, but I’m old, and I can’t quite keep up with it all, so there’s just a few people that let me sit in their circle and listen to the stories and then I go back to my corner of the internet.

And for 24. Oh goodness. I’m not a good roaster, but I’ll take Bayverse Leo (still not admitting he’s my favorite bay turtle) to task cuz boy. He runs to his daddy crying an awful lot to fix his problems. He got his personality from an old spaghetti western……. He’s definitely listens to Jpop and pretends to know every word they spit out at the speed of light. Doesn’t know SuJu is, in fact, not j pop nor speaking Japanese.

IF you wanna see a pro roast the bay boys though, I’ve got a few links for you. Snackugaki should probably be paid for the sick burns delivered in these comics. The second one is a four parter so I linked the one that has access to the others

[theresistanceneverquits]

So this last week was OCD Awareness Week and it got me thinking about how in TMNT 2012, Donnie was “confirmed” to have obsessive-compulsive disorder. (A writer who worked on the show confirmed it.) However, as someone with OCD I have never related to Donnie, and I’ve recently been rewatching the series with this knowledge in mind and still have not seen any good evidence of representation from him.

However, I feel like a character that actually displays themes of OCD well is Leo. I will say that my view of Leo’s OCD-coding is more based on his mentality, as opposed to actually showing signs of rituals or anything. This is me acknowledging that in-canon he does not exhibit Actual signs of OCD (neither does Donnie), but rather that his mentality better reflects OCD than Donnie’s does, to the point where I’ve related to Leo at times because of these themes.

There are also aspects that overlap with Leo possibly having ptsd and/or depression in the series, but I am making this analysis to educate you about how OCD works regardless, as I feel there is still something to be learned from headcanons and theories when it comes to analysis. I will also analyze how Donnie’s traits that can be skewed to represent OCD actually better fit a diagnosis of autism, using research provided to me by some friends who are autistic.

Onto the analysis! Starting with Donnie, there were a few traits I was able to identify that could work as OCD. He’s neat and organized, dislikes change, and hyperfixates on his work. He also had that chart to help him ask out April, which shows his need for preparation. However, his chart was in preparation for the sake of a goal, whereas for OCD the “preparation” is like preparing for a tragedy that will never exist. And the chart is being used to avoid social conflict as opposed to his own internal anxiety. These traits are not caused by a need to satisfy intrusive thoughts and compulsions, but are rather how he processes his environment better. Donnie would feel frustrated, off-kilter, and overwhelmed if his routines were messed with. Leo attaches more of a moral weight to the actions in his routines.

So that brings me to how Donnie shows signs of being autistic. He tends to explain things and volunteer information when the situation doesn’t call for it, and especially during dire situations. An interesting parallel is how in Rise of the TMNT, Donnie is canonically autistic; in the Rise Movie Donnie says, “Data collection calms me down.” In the season 2 finale of 2012, Donnie tells Leo that oversharing and being technical is “how I deal with stress!”

Donnie also stims, such as often sticking out his tongue when he works. He is also very particular about the layout of his stuff in his lab, and shows great distress when someone (Mikey) messes with his stuff. He doesn’t want to feel out of control of his environment in his own workspace. He also tends to take things literally, such as when Raph said “Could we pick a more cliche way to get eaten?” sarcastically, and Donnie proceed to list off actual cliches to Raph’s annoyance.

Finally, Donnie sometimes experiences sensory discomfort. When Mikey spilled “greasy popcorn” all over Donnie, Donnie was enraged, noting the fact that it was greasy in particular. Additionally, at a point where all the Turtles get sprayed with monster guts, Donnie’s initial reaction is to ask for hand sanitizer. While washing your hands and being clean is a common OCD trait, Donnie’s concern here is with because of the texture and germs associated.

Leo’s turn!

Okay so before we get to how 2012 Leo is OCD-coded, I want to point out that Leo actually definitely has OCPD in every version except for Rise and you can fight me on that. “Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder is characterized by a pervasive preoccupation with orderliness, perfectionism, and control (with no room for flexibility) that ultimately slows or interferes with completing a task;” Leo is consistently portrayed as being a controlling perfectionist. Additionally, “OCPD is a personality disorder, which means it involves personality traits that are stable, long-held, atypical, and problematic in some way. In the case of OCPD, people with this condition may find it hard to relate to others, and their devotion to perfectionism and rigid control can make it difficult to function.” This is Leo to a T. Others around him get annoyed with these traits in him, and these traits make up many of his definitive personality traits across the franchise. This side note aside, we may move on to OCD.

I am reiterating here that my purpose is to show how Leo’s themes as a character and in his story reflect those of obsessive-compulsive disorder and am seeking to analyze and educate based on that. I am not arguing that he canonically has OCD. That being said, his themes align best with the subtype of moral scrupulosity OCD, which has people obsess over the morality of their thoughts and actions and often seek outside help to distinguish the truth.

Some basics of Leo’s character that fit OCD themes: he has several episodes of panic, recurring nightmares about his worst fears, he’s controlling and a perfectionist, and thinks something bad will happen if he isn’t at his best and puts all that pressure on himself alone. People with OCD tend to believe that bad things happen because of certain things that they do or don’t do, regardless of how accurate that belief is (it is not an accurate belief). They also can seem oddly controlling to others as they try to gauge certain no-no actions from those around them. Additionally, in “Fungus Humongous,” Leo says, “I face my fear every day.” OCD is run by fear and paranoia, and we too face our fears every day. Fun fact: I like to watch “Parisitica” and “Fungus Humongous” when I’m feeling low because of how relatable I find Leo’s struggles in them.

FINALE SPOILERS: Finally, a symptom of OCD includes “Aggressive or horrific thoughts about losing control and harming yourself or others,” which I feel parallels in Mutant Apocalypse, when Leo attacks his family in a crazed state. He becomes just like the Shredder at this moment; a direct contradiction to his worst fear of losing them. He becomes double mutated because he chose to save his family over himself.

Examining now how Leo’s struggles line up with the morality theme, it’s like his brain is giving him ultimatums and black and white statements about ‘ok you have to be THIS or else THIS will happen.’ In a smaller scale, he would rather do training “right” than quickly, like in that scene where Leo’s doing his katas slower than his brothers and he makes a jab at them for their ‘poor’ form.’ Another interesting example comes with how he is consistently obsessed with finding and helping Karai throughout the series. He feels an intense sense of responsibility about it, even in situations when it really seems out of their hands, either because of wacky circumstances or because of her own actions. He says he's doing it for Splinter, but Splinter has already reassured him several times that he doesn't NEED to. His obsession conflicts with the interests of literally his entire family; it’s a situation that is linked with his morality. Leo is a very kind person who sees the best in people and wants to help them. Karai is his sister and his father’s daughter; he takes it as his personal responsibility to save her—a savior complex born from this obsession.

Now I wanna talk about Leo’s fears and where he turns to deal with them. OCD thrives off of people “Doubting and having difficulty tolerating uncertainty.” The next few sections includes major spoilers for the season 4 finale as well as talk of Main Character Death, so feel free to skip this section. Season 4’s space arc and events taking place after “Requiem” show intense examples of this for Leo. While a part of his actions here are likely due to ptsd and/or depression, it also parallels well with how OCD works.

Leo often goes to his father for advice. However, in the space arc when he’s separated from Splinter and in season 5 when Splinter is dead, Leo still has a need to seek advice and validation from his father. It is a response of grief, but it’s also his way of feeling like he’s getting guidance in a time when he doesn’t trust himself. This is similar to the reassurance-seeking compulsion, where someone with OCD goes to an outside source to entertain whatever thoughts the OCD has come up with, instead of just letting those thoughts go. Leo talking with Splinter practically every day via hologram in the space arc is his coping mechanism during that time, but even his brothers view it as excessive. It’s as if it’s the only thing tethering him during that time where he has little stability.

Additionally, ruminating is seen in the form of Leo constantly focusing on Splinter’s death, both in the space arc and post-“Requiem.” “OCD obsessions are repeated, persistent and unwanted thoughts, urges or images that are intrusive and cause distress or anxiety;” in “Trans-Dimensional Turtles” in the space arc, Leo is talking with the past version of Splinter and sees a vision of him being stabbed by the Shredder. This flashback is presented as something he is constantly thinking and worried about; very little else consumes his thoughts. The ptsd overlap once again occurs here, but I am pointing out that it is this sort of rumination that people with OCD experience often.

Finally, people with OCD “may try to ignore or stop [their] obsessions, but that only increases [their] distress and anxiety.” In the space arc, Leo is slowly being put through it, until he snaps near the end of the arc, going off on a suicide mission alone when he thinks they’ve been led astray by Fugitoid. No one in his family brought up their concerns for his mental well-being to him, and when not surrounded by his family he expressed his doubts and fears. But most of the time for those 6 months Leo spent in denial, singularly focused on their mission to save Earth and Master Splinter. It wasn’t until that vision was seemingly put in jeopardy that he finally snapped and acted reckless to the point of nearly dying. Leo simultaneously indulged in his obsessions while consciously ignoring their existence while in the presence of others, and that led to him being in great distress.

2012 Donnie is not at all a representation of obsessive-compulsive disorder past being the “smart character,” but he is a good representation of autism, whether intentional or not. Leonardo, while not explicitly being a character with OCD, does carry similar themes that make for a relatable OCD-coded character.

Here’s my contribution to OCD Awareness Week. You are now Aware.

Special Thanks:

@/sailor_the_robot on Insta for practically co-writing this with me. Much of this essay includes direct quotes from her.

@phoenixquill-art for her help as well with Donnie’s analysis!

@mej2235 for beta reading :3

Sources:

[skylarmoon71]

TMNT 2014/2016 Raphael x Reader-(Short Story) Chapter 2

"You should have just let me take him, he was right there! "

"Come on Raph, we're just supposed to help not make it worse. Besides, we stopped the train. They won't be bringing in any more weapons." Raph grumbled, sheathing both his blades. Apparently they were discussing what took place in their most recent case. Raph lived to defy Leo, it wasn't anything new.

"Whatever, next time I'm going out on my own." he shoved Leo as he brushed passed. Leo grabbed his shoulder, halting him. 

"You're not going out on your own, we do this together Raph!" You really hated it whenever they fought. Despite that, you never said anything when it got like this. Even Mikey and Donnie knew better. Raph pushed Leo back roughly, and the blue bandana turtle hit a shelf close by. Lucky for him he had his shell to take the brunt of the hit. Unlucky for you, you didn't. You were on the other side of the cupboard, and when it started to fall you panicked.

Raph saw it falling, yelling out for you. You braced your hands, closing your eyes. You heard a few items clattering to the floor at the sides of you, but when you realized you were unharmed you looked up. Donnie had his arms spread, holding up the cupboard. He lifted it in the other direction, bracing it back against its previous spot. "Are you alright?" Leo was at your side in an instant, and you sighed relieved. You smiled at Donnie who was already checking your body for injuries.

"T-Thank you Donnie you might have just saved my life." He gave a sheepish smile rubbing his neck.

"I-It was nothing. "

Now that the danger was over, Leo glared at his brother. He stomped in his direction enraged. "What the hell are you doing! You could have really hurt (Y/N)!" You stepped over placing a hand on Leo's arm to calm him down.

"I-It's fine Leo. I-It was an accident. H-He didn't mean to." Raph would never intentionally harm you.

"Yeah Leo, listen to your girlfriend. " That made you a little annoyed. Because he was already angry, you just let it slide. Leo was still sizing Raph up, and you knew you wouldn't be able to handle it if they got into another fist fight because of you. Leo glanced down at the unease in your eyes. Reluctantly, his shoulders slumped. He stepped down, and Raph just wore an arrogant smirk.

"Just like you to fold. Sometimes I wonder why you're the leader." Leo didn't reply, taking your hand and guiding you out the room. You wanted to stay there and try to get both brothers to work out the problem, but you didn't have it in you to pull away from Leo's hold, especially since he looked so worried when he thought you would get buried under the cupboard. So as he pulled you along, you sent a longing look in Raph's direction. He looked up at the last second, right before you went around the corner. That split second, you could have sworn you saw a hint of hurt in his eyes.

~~~

"Are they still fighting?" you were chatting with Donnie on your cell phone. It was pretty late, and you knew you wouldn't be able to sneak out, so you were in your room, laying down on your bed.

"Yeah, don't worry too much. Master Splinter will make sure they don't go at each other's throats." you smiled.

"That's good to hear. Well I'll check in tomorrow. Spring break is about to begin so I'll get to spend more time with you guys."

"That's-"

"Hey is that (Y/N)? Dude what's up!!" you laugh hearing Mikey in the background.

"Hey Mikey, I was just telling Donnie about the upcoming break. We may finally get to settle that score in Call of Duty."

"I'm so gonna kick your butt!" You couldn't wait.

"I'll be looking forward to it." you spoke. After giving your goodbyes, you hung up the phone, flopping back on the mattress. Somehow you'd become a little better at interacting. Before meeting the turtles you pretty much avoid interacting with people.

For good reason to. But with them, it was never a challenge. Leo was like an older brother. Mikey the goofy childish younger brother. Donnie was like a middle child. Smart, techy and a little bit of a dork. Raph was obviously the rebel. Even with all their differences, it was weird that you found comfort trusting them rather than your own species.

Maybe it was because the turtles lived by a code. They were natural born protectors, saviors. At heart, their main purpose in life was helping. And they did. They helped you, not just physically. But also mentally, emotionally. If you could offer them the world, you would do it without a second thought.

You flinched when you heard a small knock on the glass on your window. You looked over at the curtains. Maybe it was a bat? You stepped out of bed, moving to check the glass. When you shifted the curtain, you were shocked at who was hanging unto your window sill.

"R-Raph!" you slapped your hand against your mouth, because that came out much louder than intended. Opening the window, you ushered him inside quickly. As soon as you did it you ran over, turning the latch on your door.

He was lucky your room was located in the back of the house, covered by trees in your yard. It would be pretty awkward if you had to explain him to your neighbors.

Now that you were no longer in autopilot, you stood by the door. Raph was still by your window. He rolled his shoulders after climbing through the small space. And now he was just standing there, clearly unsure of what to do, or say.

"This is awkward.." you had absolutely no idea why he came, and the fact that neither of you had ever had an actual conversation alone didn't help your nerves.

"This is stupid." He groused. You kept playing with your fingers. "W-Why are you....is something wrong back home with Leo?" at the mention of his brother's name his face turned sour. "It's always about him isn't it. Leo. I came all the way here to apologize to you and that's all you have to say!"

Unconsciously you took a step back. You never did like it when he yelled. Especially since this was the first time it was directed at you. Not just that, but yelling right now wasn't the best thing since your parents were only a couple doors down. He must have realized, because he turned his head. "Forget about it. I don't even know why I came." You could feel him fuming from all the way over there. And as much as you wanted to say something, you'd already irritated him, you didn't want to say anything to make it worse. Although at this point just about anything would.

"I'm sorry." you whispered. Raph stopped in his spot, looking over his shoulder.

"I-I know I barely ever talk to you. And I always make things awkward when it's us two. I don't mean too. A-And I didn't mean to get you in trouble with Leo the other day. I-It's my fault that you guys are fighting right now." In a way it was.

Raph sighed defeatedly. He came to apologize, and instead he scared you into doing what he should have done the moment he stepped in, instead of picking a fight.

"You didn't do anything wrong. I'm the one that always messes everything up."

"That's not true." When you said that he turned to you fully. You burrowed your hands behind your back, finally feeling a little confident now that he wasn't as pissed.

"You do have a bad temper, and you suck at taking orders, but you don't mess things up." Where those words came from, you had no clue. But you were liking your sudden boldness.

"Your brothers depend on you. You guys have each other, no matter how much you think you mess up, they'll always be there for you. You just need to be better at working through your issues rather than just walking away from them."

Raph was just standing there listening, he seemed to be actually taking in you words. When he sent you a small grin your cheeks darkened.

"Here I thought you were just a little shrimp. You're a lot braver than you look. " you giggled softly. "I mean, compared to you guys I really am." you joked. Raph was smiling at you, actually smiling. He looked so damn sexy when he smiled. "No! Stop it stupid brain! I'm actually having a conversation with him, don't' ruin it!" Right now really wasn't the best time to fall for his charms.

"Thanks (Y/N)." He was thanking you. Could your night get any better.

"(Y/N) sweety are you alright?" you stiffened, and Raph looked side to side panicking.

"Aw shit!" he mouthed. You shook your hands advising him not to make a sound or move.

" I thought I heard yelling."

"I-I'm fine Mom. It was j-just a nightmare. I didn't want to wake you or dad. I-I'm sorry."

"Nightmares, do you want to talk about it." you could tell she was offering to stay awake longer to help you.

"I'm really fine mom, I promise. It was nothing. I'm going to go back to sleep. "

"Are you sure? I can make you a cup of tea or something. "

"There's no need. I promise I'm fine. Just go back to sleep." She lingered at the door for a while, before she relented. "Alright, but if you change your mind let me know."

"I will. I love you mom."

"Oh sweetheart I love you too. Try and get some rest okay. "

"Yeah I will." You waited in your spot until you heard her footsteps retreating. When you heard her bedroom door close, you sighed, placing a hand to your chest.

"That was close." you whispered. Raph was smirking at you, and it did weird things to your chest.

"W-What?"

"Nothing." It didn't look like nothing.

 "Come on tell me why you're wearing that smug little woah!" you had planned to march over, but you slipped on something on your floor. Raph was quicker, he caught you almost instantly. You must have stopped breathing for at least a few seconds, because you just stayed there in his arms. Your eyes connected, and that's when you let out a shallow breath. Raph was just as taken as you. He didn't move a muscle, just held you upright. You palm flattened against his chest, eyes never straying from his hypnotic gaze. With him slightly bent, all you had to do was lean up a few inches and you could close that space.

"Raph.." the sound of his name broke the spell. He straightened your body, pulling away. He cleared his throat, taking a couple steps back. "I should get going I need to-" he knocked into your desk behind on his way to leave and you winced at the sound that echoed. Raph froze, listening to make sure he didn't give your mother another reason to come back. When there wasn't any sound he relaxed, moving to your window.

"Be careful." you said gesturing to his head as he almost ran right into the glass. He just gave a force laugh, raising the window glass. You smiled. He was sort of cute like this. All fidgety. He ducked, creeping out the way he came in. "I'll come by tomorrow." you stated.

"Yeah..." he responded, but it didn't sound like he was really listening. He looked distracted.

"I guess I'll see you tomorrow then."

He nodded, inching up the wall.

"Yeah tomorrow." And just like that, he was flipping to the top of your roof. You bent your head, watching as he took off into the night.

You were looking forward to tomorrow, that was for sure.

[glitchh3d]

||Helping to Forget|| ~ Snippet (Feeling down)

I’m feeling kind of sad so I wrote something nice and cute about Terushima and (Y/n) and yeah... 

Word count: 884 Warnings: Language

Masterlist

September 4th

“(Y/n)?” Terushima called into the apartment. “I come bearing gifts!” He kicked off his shoes after shutting the door. 

There was no response. 

“(Y/n)?” He called again. He set down the bag of takeout on the table and shoved his keys into his pocket. “Where are you?” 

“Ah! Yuuji! I-I’m just-” He heard her sniffle and get up from her bed as he approached her door. Right as he turned to walk into the room, the door slammed on his face. “J-just give me a minute!” 

“Are you alright? Are you crying?” A choked sob came from behind the door and Terushima’s eyes blew wide. “(Y/n), hey open the door. Talk to me.” 

“I can’t! Just- I’m fine!” 

“Clearly you're not! Please, I just want to help you out, princess!” Terushima wiggled the doorknob, noticing it was unlocked. He turned it hesitantly and shoved the door open. 

(Y/n) sat in her bed, comforter wrapped around her head and shoulders. She had her knees pulled to her chest and she was now, very obviously, crying. Terushima felt his heart ache and he rushed forward, pulling (Y/n) into his arms. 

“(Y/n)...” She leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his waist. She sobbed into his chest. “Please talk to me.” He whispered, setting his chin on the top of her head. 

“I just- I’m a failure. My mom and dad- and, and-” Her voice got caught in her through as more tears came flowing out of her eyes. 

“No, (Y/n). No, that’s- why would you say that? You’re not a failure at all. You’re beautiful, and smart. You have such an amazing personality and your so fucking perfect,” Terushima said, pulling the blanket away from her head. He leaned them back onto her pile of pillows and held her cheeks in his hands. “You’re absolutely perfect.” 

She shook her head. 

“Yes you are.” 

“You have to say that. You’re my best friend!” Her lip quivered as he wiped away some stray tears. He scoffed at her. 

“No. I’m saying that because it’s true. Even ask Futakuchi, or Taichi. Or Atsumu. You’re so smart, and-”

“I’m not smart!” (Y/n) pulled her phone from her pocket. She hovered her thumb over the finger recognition and Terushima glanced at the screen. Her grades were pulled up for her History class. “Look.” 

He looked closer, noticing that she got a 62% on an essay he knew she worked super hard on. “Fuck, (Y/n). That’s just because your History professor is a sexist asshole.” Terushima grabbed the phone away, swiping the grades off of the screen. Instead he went to her instagram. 

“Look at this, (Y/n).” She looked at her phone screen in confusion. 

“It’s… it’s just my instagram?” 

“That might be what you see, but do you wanna know what I see?” (Y/n) hesitated before nodding. Terushima clicked on the first photo. It was of her at a local nursing home playing a board game with a group of old women. 

“This is you volunteering at a nursing home. Do you know how many college students WILLINGLY do this?” She shrugged. “None. I’d never in a million years go to a nursing home. And you do it for fun because seeing the smiles on those old peoples faces make you happy. And you make them happy.” He clicked on another photo. 

This time it was of a photo of her and her cousins on the beach. She’d been on vacation visiting her family and she’d convinced her younger cousins to go do trash pickup at their local beach. “What do you see?” Terushima asked. She sighed. 

“I see… I see me? Picking up garbage…” 

“Right. Because you're not some fake ‘save the turtles’ VSCO girl. You’re a real genuine human who enjoys making life better for other people and creatures.” 

The next photo was of her on a mission trip. She was handing out water and supplies to people who’d just suffered loss from a tsunami. The next photo was from the same trip, playing with some little kids who were traumatized and upset to try and lift their spirits. 

“Being smart isn’t the only thing that matters in life, (Y/n). Being kind and true to yourself is a sign of true success. If you can get through life and obtain being a genuine good human being, then I'd say you’re a winner. Grades don’t matter, that one stupid history paper doesn’t matter.” Terushima said. 

“You’re perfect and amazing and wonderful and I just want to help you realize that,” Terushima said, shutting her phone off. He set it down next to him on the bed before wrapping (Y/n) in his arms again. He pulled her close, kissing the top of her head. 

“Promise me that if you ever feel like you’re not good enough or you're a disappointment, that you’ll come to me and talk to me, okay? Because you should never feel like that and I’ll be damned if I sit back and not do anything.” (Y/n) nodded, snuggling closer to her friend. 

“Good. Come on, (Y/n). I got us some take-out. Why don’t we watch your favorite movie and eat?” 

“Sure. Thank you, Yuu-chii.” 

“Of course. Anything for my princess.”

Taglist: @kaitycole, @cosmicmermaid25, @sempiternal-amour, @99astrid, @hidden-otaku-stuff, @vicassa, @elianetsantana, @ankl3s, @newfriendjen, @oikawa-simp, @dakotacecily, @axolotleyeliner, @heyyourecute, @tchalameme, @toobsessedsstuff

[tomatosauceagent]

Opening a door isn’t always a bad thing

pairing: JJ Maybank x reader

summary: You often have bad dreams about your past and JJ finds out. 

warnings: angst, maybe some hints of depression, some bad language, a little fluff at the end

wc: about 1,400

a/n: soo here's my first one-shot ever. I am so excited about what you guys think about it. My mother language is not English, so I want to apologize for any wrong sentences and grammar things. If you have suggestions on what I could do better, you can always message me. We can never stop growing <3

I woke up on John B's couch, heart pumping fast and sweat running down my back, as I could feel the shirt I stole from JJ the other day stuck to my body. It was the fourth time this week that I was torn out of sleep, and it was only Friday. I ran my hand over my eyes, trying to calm down, lowering my pulse again, so I could get a bit more sleep, considering it's still dark outside.

 It's been four years since I started having these bad dreams, but I have never told anybody about them, especially not the Pogues. I was afraid they would make fun of me for having nightmares at my age, especially nightmares about my past. I sighed quietly, as I looked around. 

JJ and Pope were sleeping nearly on top of each other, because of the small space on the mattress that was lying on the ground. Kiara slept next to me, cuddling a pillow and mumbling soft words about some turtles sailing a ship. John B and Sarah were nowhere to be seen. They probably went to JB's bedroom after everyone fell asleep last night, doing whatever couples did when no one was around. I let my eyes wander to the small clock hanging in the corner of the room. After I could identify what time it was, I slowly stood up, hoping I was quiet enough to not wake everyone up. If I would hurry a bit, I could maybe see the sun rising above the ocean on the horizon.

 I always did that as a kid when I couldn't sleep. It was my safe spot, sitting on a roof, watching a new day being born. It felt like flying. Being up there, with no one telling me what to do or how to behave. I just set in silence, enjoying every single moment, before I had to climb down the ladder into hell again. As I walked out of the Chateau towards the beach, I thought about the last time I've watched the sun rising. It was a long time ago. 

Kiara and I have fought about some stupid turron I've met at a kegger. I remember storming out of the Chateau, grabbing my bike and driving away. I was gone for three days, hiding outside of town. I didn't know where to go, so just stayed at a lake, sleeping under the stars and waking up with the first sunbeam. But the loneliness made me think about my past and how I destroyed everything and everyone I've touched. 

It made me think about when my parents told me, I was not smart enough for going to that special school my old friends went or not being pretty enough to go to dinner at a noble restaurant with them. It broke my heart but I've learned to live with it. I became aggressive if someone said one bad thing about me. I was even worse than JJ. I've never opened up to anyone, especially not about the things that have happened in my childhood. I was afraid they would let me fall if I would tell them. Just like my parents did. 

I always managed to get through, to keep my thoughts in a chest somewhere in the very back of my brain. But sometimes, that chest opened up and the demons came out, causing nightmares and fear. And when that happened, I wanted to be alone, like I always was during hard times. Soon I felt the cool sand under my feet, as I walked towards the water. I tried to smile, to enjoy that beautiful scenery in front of me, how the sun sparkled in the water, but I just couldn't. I felt numb inside, not having enough energy to even think about being happy. 

As I reached the ocean and the cold waves hit my legs. I set down, not caring about my clothing getting all wet. I had to wash anyway, because of the sweat.

I closed my eyes, whiles wrapping my arms around my legs, forming my body into a small ball, hoping I would just be invisible.

 I zoned out after some time, only listening to the soft sound of the ocean. I sometimes wished I could just jump right into the waves and swim away. Starting over somewhere in a foreign county, forgetting about my old life and my old problems. I felt tears running down my cheeks, as I thought about these things. I quickly wiped them away, not wanting to feel weak. 

Just as my thoughts were about to wander even deeper into my darkest memories, I could feel someone sitting down beside me. I quietly thanked myself for wiping the tears away after I've recognized JJ. 

I knew the Pogues weren't used to seeing me cry, so if JJ would've seen the tears, he would immediately question it.

 "Watcha doin' out here, buttercup? It's not even six yet." He asked me, his eyes searching for any emotion on my skin. JJ was always there for me and he always tried to protect me. But he is no god and he could not save me from the hole I once fell in. 

"Just watching the sunset, J. Couldn't sleep." I heard my one voice trembling. 

"Y/N, what's going on? I mean... I can see that something's up. You can trust me, you know that, right?" His voice seems to soften even more. I just shook my head and looked away as I felt the tears running down my cheeks again.

I heard a frustrated sigh coming from his side and soon after I felt his hands around my body. "No. I don't want to bother you. I mean you have enough going on with your father and all the jobs you have. I don't want to be another thing that circles through your mind all the time" I said. 

My heart dropped as I looked up at him. His eyes were filled with more than just sadness. I could see a whole world breaking when I looked into his eyes. "Why do you think that? You are always on my mind. Y/N I care about you and I don't want you to be sad about anything. I want you to open up and talk to me" 

I nodded slowly "Maybe another time." I told him, ready to stand up walk away, but he grabbed my hand and pulled me to the ground again "Just tell me what's going. Please, I don't want to see you sad."

"It's just... old feelings came up after that dream and... I remembered shit from my childhood. It's fine J, really" He carefully wiped a tear away that was running down my cheek. "Well, it's not fine if you're crying!" He said desperately. 

I sighed quietly "I've dreamed about how my father... you know... telling me stupid things about how I look and stuff. He always told me that I was the reason why he never had enough money, but he spent it all on alcohol and drugs. I always have that dream that my parents are throwing me in a big dark hole and I just fall. I am afraid I will fall forever, you know?" I said, not daring to look into his eyes.

 I didn't want to see his reaction. I just wanted him to stand up and go. But he just took me in his arms again and kissed the top of my head.

 "You don't have to be afraid of nothing, Y/N. I will always be here for you. I can understand how you are feeling, but you have to try to let go. It's never easy, but it will eat you up from inside, buttercup. Trust me. Before I told you about my father, I felt the same. But help me forget all those things. And I want to help you to forget them" I nodded and leaned myself more into his chest.

 I somehow felt safe. It was the feeling I had on the roof when I was younger. Maybe it was time for me to stop building a wall around me. "Thank you" I whispered quietly, while I closed my eyes again, enjoying his warmth.

[readbythestarlight]

c2e105

Nord by Nordwest huh

The fact that Taliesin can keep a straight face during all this, while Liam and Travis and Matt are losing it

"Cyber abacus"

ASHLEY NOT YOU TOO xD

I love how they play the "Taliesin is an ancient Fae being" even when he’s being a super hacker

I need some of Ashley’s colorful jackets

[[MORE]]

Oooo can she poof them to Vokodo’s lair?

Oh maybe not no

C: "I would love to see a door open into a tree"

Cad: "well most doors used to be trees"

Oh my god Jester wants to put the dragon turtle against Vokodo alskslskak

God I love her

Listen listen what if y’all polymorph the dragon turtle into something small, get him inside, and have him fight Vokodo

Y’all are coming up with so many crazy clever plans

Did y’all forget about the spell booby trap bombs tho those were cool too

I was gonna say, they might not all want to leave at all

And some might want their ships so that’s true

I feel like if they’re not careful Vilya is going to be fairly unimpressed with them and their disregard for people’s possible livelihoods, especially after the situation against the ghost guys

Like, brining the Dragonturtle in to fight Vokodo is cool, bringing him in to destroy ships to (hopefully) lure Vokodo out is bad, especially because there’s no guarantee it’ll even work

Idk I just feel like this is a fun but irresponsible plan

Suddenly the Dragonturtle sounds like Orli xD

See the only problem with half the M9 being in love with Jester is that they indulge her ideas sometimes even when they’re not the best

B: "does Vokodo even care about the ships?" THANK you Beau why didn’t you ask that before Jester told the turtle where they are

I don’t think Vokodo cares so much about sentimental value. If that were the case Nott’s flask, Cad’s shield would have been worth more to him. And he would have insisted on Beau’s bracers.

Jester: makes a cake feast

Me, immediately: "I want a feast

I want a bean feast

Cream buns and doughnuts

And fruitcake with no nuts

So good you could go nuts"

Jester is much nicer than Veruka but that verse fits so well

Pancakes hell yeah

"It’s been so long since I had a pancake"

Vilya is a woman after my own heart

I scanned Sam’s QR code he’s such a nerd

Aw Jester sweetie

J, crying: "I am not sad"

Baby girl

"What if it were just you and him? Like the old days?"

"I don’t think that’s a bad thing."

Jester, honey </3

Someone hug her!!

I’m glad she’s telling them the truth about the Traveler knowing about Vokodo

Listening to her make excuses for him is hard

I can’t believe Jester’s story is almost actually about her literally getting out of a cult

TravelerCon

Traveler.... Con...

"Also if he hurts you I’ll kill him" Beau xD

It’s "everybody loves Jester" hour

Y: "I’ve never had pancakes before this is amazing this is like my new favorite thing"

F: "you haven’t touched your bugs much"

Y: "that’s because I’m eating all the pancakes"

Beau didn’t Dairon kick your ass last time y’all squared off?

Wait

WHY

The everloving fuck

Didn’t they have Vilya tree-door them off the island for the night so they’d be safe and then just tree-door them back in the morning??

Oh?

Yasha dream?

Gasp!

Feather!

AYO STORMLORD WASSUP ITS BEEN A WHILE MY DUDE

Come on Yasha come on Yasha you can do it you can do it!!

"Do not run for yourself. Overcome what falters. And rise stronger."

REACH IT BABY GIRL YES

oh frick

"I will look up at it and I will just say... ‘I do not want this fear anymore’, and I will stand there and sit for it to hit me"

Baby giiiiiiirl

"Of broken chain link, tethered and tangled beneath you"

I! AM! CRYING!

"Show me you can be reborn"

"....Okay."

Wings wings wings?

"Like flowers blossoming" oh my god I’m weeping

YASHAAAAA

Full, angelic <3

No

Don’t go back, baby girl.

Fuck I was afraid he was going to say it was Zuala

My heart

"I crouch down, and I put my hand out—"

"I have to go."

And she leaps UP

oh god I’m cry

"I’m proud of you"

"Don’t let me be a shackle"

*sobbbbbbb*

I’m an emotional wreck rn

Have them a false sense of security there for a sec Matt Lol

Oh, it’s Caleb’s turn...

Instead of wasting the spell tight away they should have tried to explain it to him and see if that helped first

Okay but they were all tied together so like how did they take it away and hide it

I hope they get a LOT of treasure to make up for all this lost diamond/residuum dust

Stop wasting messages! Just leave him alone!

I’m glad tbh I just don’t think this was a good idea

Please just go fight him y’all are just making it more complicated at this point

I really hope they didn’t just destroy someone’s only way to get out

Like obviously it’s important to save everyone first but I hope they find ways to make sure they don’t just send someone home with no way to support themselves

Also I cannot believe this works

Like why would he care about the ships??

Y’all are gonna have blown up ships and gotten the town destroyed probably

Here we go

See IF they successfully drew him up they’d have missed this map

And now really all they’ve done is pissed him off in advance

Poor Yasha. Somebody get her something to boost her wisdom

Wisdom saves galore

Wait why did polymorph bounce off??

Also where did the plan of “bombard him with banishment” go

Ooo clever Veth!

Ooooo nice! ASTRAL DREADNAUGHT WOOOOOO

Lightning in water, would that be bad?

Oh my god did they banish her???

Wtf

So Vokodo must have some feat that allows him to deflect spells when he makes the save

This feat is the WORST

Yayyyy Yasha!

Okay so banishment is NOT working

Everyone like “Liam are you gonna bring Beau back??”

Wait

He’s gone

But he’s got their stuff??

Caleb’s necklace of protection?? Veth’s flask? Yasha’s other sword?

Being!

Him!

Back!

Okay wait this is gonna be bad isn’t it

WHAT

OMG

THE BEST NAT1

Holy SHIT?!

Daaaaaamn GO CALEB

that’s amazing holy shit

Now get that treasure!

Damn that was intense

I’m so glad they brought Vokodo back to just destroy him

L: “Ooo like the ring girl?”

T: “SHUT! UP! There is no association to that!”

I hope they can at least find Caleb’s ring

Will the island be back to normal-ish?

Probably not?

Anyway I’m glad they just went down and fought him because that was amazing

Oh fuck y’all so listen he was being persued by a city? And the tower was probably part of the city. And Matt said that tower looked similar to the ruins outside Roshanna (Gordranus?)

You know, the one destroyed during the calamity?

What if

What iiiiiif

I mean it’s just a theory but what if

[blue-lamento]

This post was written for the user @j-penny, who insists that Leo is the most unexplored character compared to his brothers. We are going to prove this statement wrong.

We are using the 2003 cartoon as the example not only because it’s known among most fans, but also because we consider Leo-03 to be one of the best versions of the character.

Introduction

Usually those who write analysis of a character use two terms – character development and characterization. However, people don’t usually use the same meaning for both of them. For instance, some people believe that characterization is the part of character development, because we, the audience, discover more details about our character and thus he develops in our eyes. And other people believe that character development and characterization exist apart from one another, because character development implies the change over the story, while characterization implies a particular set of traits in a particular time of the story.

We have decided to choose the second model because it’s more common and because the story of 2003 usually puts the plot on the first place rather than the characters, which is why they develop slowly and their personality becomes more flashed out with time.

Part 1. Leo’s first traits.

At the beginning of the first season we were given some of the most important traits of our character.

Dedication. This trait was unfolded in the first episode, when Leo has passed Splinter’s challenge. Leo loves to train and study; his outstanding physical (and spiritual) strength is noticeable through exercise and combat; it was also observed by the Shredder.

He trains for the sake of self-improvement and he takes ninjitsu seriously.

‘I'm not striving to be perfect, only perfectly proficient’*

‘Ninjitsu is not a game!’*

However that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t like to have fun. He loves to hang out with his brothers, play with Raph, ride a Sewer Slider or a scooter and poke fun at Mikey.

‘With that aside, I do realize the need for fun and relaxation. While I often disagree with Raphael, he is my brother, and I enjoy the times that we spend goofing off’*

The abidance of Bushido. Bushido (honor) plays a huge role in Leo’s life, because it shapes his personality. One’s actions are a reflection of who one really is and Leo’s actions reflect:

His devotion to his family.

His respect for others.

His kindness.

His mercifulness.

This makes him a pure-hearted person and sometimes his purity shows in other ways)))

Introversivness (or isolation). Leo demonstrates his isolation when it comes to his own problems. He doesn’t seem to be eager to discuss his distress (for example, when he was spending all his time out in the barn in the twentieth episode of the first season) and sometimes even refuses to get help (as it was shown in ‘Samurai Tourist’). The only way to get something out of him is to start talking first, because he is never going to be the one to do it. 

Leo also has a trait that needs to be cleared up.

Leadership. This part of his character has created a lot of trouble before rotTMNT came out, which is why everything should be addressed.

Firstly, he is not an official leader.

That means that he didn’t have any ceremonies and he certainly isn’t pressured by Splinter, (like he was in the 2007 movie and 2012 cartoon), although the latter does like to leave Leo in charge when he is away.

He has chosen the path of the leader himself simply because he understands that his family doesn’t have a peaceful life.

‘I try to be the leader of the team, since someone has to be and I'm the only one who seems to be interested in order’*

‘I train diligently and read up on strategy to better prepare my family for times of duress’*

‘I guess this may seem a little hard-nosed, but if you were in my shoes, I think you'd agree that someone has to play the ‘heavy’’*

‘I love my family more than life itself, so I feel responsible to ensure their protection’*

Secondly, while Leo can worry about his incompetence as a leader (the conflict of the fourth season), he can also torment himself over something more personal (the conflict of the first season; ‘City at War’), which proves further that his character doesn’t only revolve around his role in the team.

Thirdly, Leo is not a control freak. When his brothers know more about the situation, he has no problem in letting them take the lead, while he takes part in solving local problems.

We also shouldn’t forget that some of his orders exist because of Splinter and as someone who values security and peace, Leo also values his master’s wishes and wants his brothers to follow them, even though he sometimes goes against them as well.

Fourthly, unlike the 2012 cartoon, in 2003 Leo’s brothers respect him and listen to his orders, although they do tend to go against Splinter’s instructions, but that’s a big difference, mind you.

And lastly, Leo doesn’t have any fights with Raph because of his leadership nor is there any hatred between them. Their arguments are usually focused on different opinions, not on the ‘I don’t take orders from you’ line (ex. ‘City at War’).

In ‘Tales of Leo’ Raph showed that he understood that Leo was more suited for the role back when they were kids, a period, when he thought that being a leader was all about bravery and strength, but seeing Leo taking out the huge alligator by using his brains he was exposed to another side of the role.

Overall, Leo and Raph have a good relationship that goes beyond the ‘a leader and a hothead’ shtick.  An excellent opinion on this topic can also be read here: (1), (2).

Curiosity. This trait is actually ignored by fans, which in result makes them portray Leo as Splinter’s loyal puppy and it’s not correct.

Leo, as we said before, values Splinter’s opinion, but that doesn’t stop him from wanting to explore and participate in his brother’s intrigues. In the third episode of the first season Leo mumbled ‘Splinter is going to kill us!’ and immediately went off on an adventure and this didn’t happen just once.

At first Leo acts careful, however it is really easy to convince him to take part in anything, even if Splinter would be against it.

 Part 2. The outlived trait.

Some fans tend to think that Leo is arrogant. Do these fans have a point when it comes to Leo in 2003 cartoon? Well, yes and no, because he did in fact have the similar trait, although he outlived it pretty fast.

The trait was shown in the tenth episode of the first season, ‘Shredder Strikes Part 1’, where at the beginning Leo was talking about his swords being superior to any other weapon. But where did this thought come from? Well, it was written in some book, so it must be true, right? Splinter, however, said the complete opposite, which Leo genuinely didn’t understand and he was frustrated about it. So was Leo really just plain arrogant? Not exactly.

Next we are taken to a talk between Leo and Oroku Saki and the latter has almost convinced Leo to join to Foot clan. We see that Leo has done the same mistake when he believed the half-truth about swords written in the book – he believed Saki’s half-truths.

In both cases Leo acted gullible (almost naïve) and thus he acted imperious in the first situation and vulnerable in the second. He wasn’t arrogant for no reason and that helped him get rid of the characteristic. After that episode he has never shown the flaw again.

Part 3. The ‘failure’ theme.

Every turtle has a weakness, be it Raph’s inability to control his anger or Mikey’s immaturity.

After Shredder’s second strike we are told in ‘Tales of Leo’ that he has a hard time dealing with failures, which escalates to a real fear that opens up Leo’s insecurities and anxieties throughout the first four seasons. Every conflict that is connected to the character has a word ‘failed’ or ‘failure’ in it, which makes it his inner theme.

All in all, his constant battle against his fears flashes out his character and adds more to it, which will be discussed in next parts.

Part 4. Northampton.

This is an introduction to Leo’s ‘failure’ theme.

After Leo has woken up he was straightway upset. While talking to Raph, who visited him at the barn, he explained what was bothering him so much: he let everyone down, got ‘his shell kicked’, lost his swords (and moreover he developed a fear over the Elite Guard). In short, not only did he feel like a failure, but he was also humiliated.

The one who helped Leo recover was Raph, which again proves that both of them have a great and deep relationship and that Raph, even though he often acts all grumpy and snarky, has enough kindness in him to support his brothers when they need it.

Part 5. The cosmos.

When the boys were stuck in other galaxy, Leo was upset as well. We saw it two times; when the turtles were told about their location and when they thought they have lost the Fugitoid to Triceratons. During both instances the situation seemed to be dead-end, Leo clearly didn’t know what to do next and for him it automatically meant that they have failed. This affected his spirit similarly to how he was acting in Northampton, however Raph couldn’t help him the second time. Leo needed something else. He needed hope. And when he has it he is unstoppable.

Leo was really active during the cosmic arc; he was doing the job that every leader should when his team finds themselves in unknown circumstances. The arc has listed out the reasons why Leo is a good leader:

1. Because he uses strategy.

2. Because he can think fast under pressure.

3. Because he is ready to take risks.

4. Because he is resourceful.

Part 6. City at War.

Leo (and Karai of course) has always played an important role in ‘City at War’ arc.

Before we dive in Leo’s character we have to briefly talk about the conflict. Leo felt responsible for waking up the mafia and turning the city into chaos because of Shredder’s death and he wanted to do something about it.

However his family found the idea of staying at home and doing nothing about the war more appealing, which Leo didn’t like. And even if Mikey said that he understood where Leo was coming from, it wasn’t enough for him to go with Leo to fix their wrongdoings. No one supported Leo, but that wasn’t a problem for him, because he didn’t need an approval from his family; even Splinter, who Leo respected the most, couldn’t change his mind and couldn’t stop him from running away.

‘City at War’ was always known for its main theme of revenge, but this time the writers decided to create a new theme to keep the story different and this theme revolves around, as Splinter has said in the end, following your heart. During the whole arc Leo was acting according to his own views and he always stayed true to himself, which means that his beliefs are strong and he is ready to act independently from his family if needed.

Part 7. Leo’s fear.

In the third season there was an episode about turtle’s fear. At first glance the story doesn’t give us a complex explanation to work with, but with more research more details rise to the surface.

There is a good analysis of this episode on the site, so we are going to link it.

Overall, while Leo does hate the idea of failure, his deepest fears are connected to other issues and it’s great, because it indeed makes him more complex.

 Part 8. The fourth season.

It’s the culmination of everything we have learned about him.

The conflict is in one way the opposite of the conflict in Northampton. In the first season Leo was the only one who got heavily injured, but in the finale of the third season everyone in Leo’s family was injured. While talking to Usagi and April in ‘Sons of the Silent Age’ and ‘Samurai Tourist’ Leo described his feelings the following way: ‘the only thing that I could think of was to blow up the ship’, ‘I couldn’t save them’, ‘I was useless’, ‘I wasn’t good enough’. Most of his thoughts were connected to his family and because of his sense of responsibility for them Leo felt guilty for not finding another way to solve the problem. This brings us to the conclusion: while in the first season Leo’s distress was only about him, in the fourth season it was about his family, which is why he was traumatized so deeply.

Just like in the ‘City at War’ Leo have decided to fix his failure by doing everything to protect his family.

Firstly he had to fix himself. He started to train more, forgetting completely about having fun with his brothers (in other word isolated himself). He also became more ruthless with enemies.

And secondly he had to fix his family. He started to train them himself and by accusing them of being immature demanded his brothers to take threats and tasks seriously.

However that wasn’t enough. His self-hatred, him not wanting to talk about his trauma openly, the need to be stronger and his non-acceptance of defeat pressured Leo and as a result he lost his grip and took his anger out on Splinter.

With the Ancient One Leo has learned to accept his failure and to not feel guilty over something he couldn’t control.

After that Leo has fully developed, he didn’t have any more room to grow. He was finished and the writer understood that as well.

The conclusion.

Turns out that Leo was actually a well explored character with rich traits, but why then people like j-penny love to say the opposite?

The first reason is that people simply don’t find these traits interesting. The other reason is that people don’t think that being kind, committed to an old code of honor and showing dedication towards one's family or studying are worthwhile qualities, which is why the only thing that some people notice about Leo is the fact that he is the leader and that he has some insecurities. That creates a limited image of the character, not to mention that some fans twist the image and make Leo a controlling, cold and boring leader, which he is not. Is this Leo’s fault? No way.

So… can you not like Leonardo? Of course, it’s just a matter of taste. But can you belittle Leo in order to put another character on the pedestal? No one is stopping you, but would that make you sound smart and your statement sound true just because you have learned some buzzwords that don’t hold any real evidence? Decide that for yourself.

We were actually thinking about analyzing other incarnations (especially Mirage's Leo, since he is also one of our favorite versions), but we didn't have any time or power to do so...

(*) -  These quotes were taken from the archive of an official Mirage studios site

[occasionalfics]

hi so i haven’t made any real posts in a while bc i haven’t really been writing that much but i wanted to just post SOMETHING for y’all to interact with

anyway, if you don’t know, i have a youtube channel and i’ve been watching (almost) every movie that chris evans is in because i love him and reviewing them for my channel and i thought i’d give a rundown of the movies i’ve seen so far (including ones i haven’t rewatched for the channel yet because i’m not gonna link to the videos - if you really want to watch, message me) so maybe you could decide which ones are worth your time and/or money 😂

for this, i’ll give a brief description, my general thoughts, and a score from 1-10 (1 being unwatchable and 10 being PEAK cinema)

i’m keeping things very light on spoilers, meaning there might be one or two overall but not for every movie.

so here we go:

The Newcomers (2000) - some indie movie with no theatrical release about a family that moves from boston to vermont because of money troubles. chris is in it for like 5 minutes and he’s honestly the second best part (second to a dog only). 3/10, mostly boring but not offensive.

Not Another Teen Movie (2001) - i feel like everyone has seen this. it’s a spoof of 80′s and 90′s teen movies (namely she’s all that and cruel intentions). chris plays the main love interest and he’s definitely funny enough to pull off the part but it’s not really my thing. 4/10.

The Perfect Score (2004) - this is the first time chris and sc*rj* worked together. 6 high school kids fail the SATs so instead of retaking them, they sneak into a government building and steal the answers. it’s an mtv movie and it’s...fine? not great, not special, but...very early aughts mtv for sure. 4/10

Cellular (2004) - an action flick where chris plays a regular dude who gets a call from a woman who’s been kidnapped, and then has to keep communications up with her in order to save her and take down some corrupt cops. surprisingly funny, i had a great time watching, would recommend! 7/10

Fierce People (2005) - i think this was another indie movie without a theatrical release. based on a book that, from the reviews of both, is identical, i think because the author of the book was also the screenplay writer. and that’s probably why this movie sucked. bby anton yelchin (rip) gets caught scoring drugs for his mom, and because she has connections to this super rich dude, they end up going to live in new jersey with his weirdass family instead of bby anton going to jail. chris’s character is not who you think he is. content warnings for drugs, rape, and murder. overall boring, not what it thinks it is, 4/10

Fantastic Four (2005) - okay everyone’s seen these. i actually hate both of these FF movies, but chris as johnny storm is the only shinning light in either. reed is the WORST and sue is treated like eye candy. 4/10 for johnny storm alone.

London (2005) - literally the worst movie i have ever seen. i hate london. also an indie movie, very misogynistic, very pretentious and self-important. lonely emo boy does drugs with random people in a bathroom at a party he was not invited to INTENTIONALLY, in the hopes that he will win over his ex girlfriend, who he repeatedly emotionally abused while they were together, even though the party is literally in honor of her moving across the country. and she didn’t want him there. please never, ever bother watching london and talking about it online - fuckbois will attempt to tell you that you know nothing repeatedly. 1/10, worst film ever made.

TMNT (2007) - does this need an introduction? chris plays casey, but the movie’s really about the turtles. honestly the writing kind of relies on you knowing a lot about the turtle lore and overall it’s a boring but ultimately harmless film. it’s just really not worth your time. 2/10

Sunshine (2007) - ONE OF THE BEST MOVIES I HAVE EVER SEEN, I HAVE NOT  STOPPED THINKING ABOUT SUNSHINE IN OVER A YEAR. 8 astronauts are on a mission to ignite a nuclear bomb into the dying heart of our sun. but it’s a space film so shit goes wrong and, one by one, they start dying. very tense, very sad. the biggest complaint all around is that the first 2/3s of the movie are one genre and the last 3rd is a completely different movie, and yet it’s STILL amazing. please watch (if you can handle a space thriller)! 8/10

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007) - a very bad follow up to a very bad origin movie. not even andre braugher could save this one. reed is really mean to johnny for no reason and i hate his guts. 3/10

The Nanny Diaries (2007) - second time appearing alongside sc*rj*. she’s the main character. an anthropology student takes on a nannying job for an upperclass family in new york, but the job ends up being more than she bargained for. chris plays harvard hottie, her upstairs neighbor who is THE BEST BOY. i loved this movie. 8/10

Battle for Terra (2007) - a very weird but very good animated movie about humans attempting to colonize an alien planet because we were stupid enough to destroy earth, venus, and mars. lots of big names on the cast list for a movie that not many people saw, but it goes ham in the “fuck colonizers” theme. overall, a surprising joy. 6.5/10

Street Kings (2008) - well this was directed by david ayer so my friend and i went into this with very low expectations and it didn’t even meet that bar. keanu reeves plays a sad and angry corrupt cop who almost kind of gets framed for killing another cop, and then spends a good chunk of the runtime just hunting down other corrupt cops without doing anything about his own corruption. it’s copaganda, but very bad copaganda. also chris dies. fuck this movie, don’t waste your time. this is another one where the fanboys will come for you if you say a bad thing about it on the internet, 2/10

The Loss of a Teardrop Diamond (2008) - another indie that apparently caught the eye of kevin fiege? i don’t really know why because chris’s character is very bland and the movie overall is nothing special. tennessee williams wrote the screenplay before he died in the 80′s and then this was made and nothing about it was changed. it’s basically straight people in the 20′s in the south being weird and rude. a rich girl pays a hot poor boy to escort her to parties after a huge scandal was caused by her father. she loves the poor boy but he doesn’t return the feelings and everyone’s sad, dying, or mean. skip it, honestly. 4/10

Push (2009) - honestly, an underrated movie that so often gets shit on because of x-men. push is so good! a telekinetic man meets a young girl who can see the future, who tells him that if he helps her find her mom, they’ll also come into $6 million. they run into his ex and the government department trying to control people with powers, and shit ensues. chris’s chemistry with dakota fanning as big brother/little sister is adorable and i need more people to talk about it. 8/10, very worth your time.

The Losers (2010) - apparently went up against some other star-studded action flick with a similar plot at the time of release and suffered for it, but other than that, this is a fun romp with lots of character. a team of militiamen are framed for an international scandal and forced to go underground until a mysterious woman helps them exact revenge on the billionaire who framed them so they can go back to their families. chris plays one of the secondary characters and he’s PERFECT. best character in the whole movie! you’ve probably seen the “don’t stop believing”/”lethal killing machine” scene around tumblr before - that’s just how his character is the whole movie and it’s great. definitely recommend! 7/10

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World (2010) - we’ve all seen it. lucas lee is the best. there are lots of problems in the word choice and some of the moral quandaries but overall, an enjoyable ode to videogames and comic books. 6.5/10

Puncture (2011) - once again, an indie film with very little theatrical release. WHOOOH though. this movie. SO GOOD! two personal injury lawyers take on a case when a nurse is accidentally pricked on the job and contracts AIDS. they take on a huge pharmaceutical supply company in the hopes of manufacturing and creating a legal standard for using safety needles to protect frontline medical workers, all while chris’s character is dealing with being an addict. based on a true story, honestly   one of chris’s best performances (and that’s across the board). you can  rent it cheap from youtube and it’s totally worth it. 7.5/10

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011) - i mean. it’s cap. honestly this movie feels a little long even though it’s not. overall it’s a good, enjoyable movie and watching it all the way through reminded me of why bucky was so important. 7/10

What's Your Number? (2011) - okay honestly i love this movie? a woman is slutshamed by her sister’s friends and then embarks on a journey through her past relationships to find her soulmate, only to realize that it doesn’t matter how many men she’s slept with because the right one really won’t give a damn and neither should she. everyone’s seen naked collin around tumblr. he’s a good boy. mostly. 7/10

The Avengers (2012) - so i can appreciate that this was like THE event movie of the summer of 2012 but it is LONG and there’s still so much spy shit i don’t understand. my friends and i also think that j*ss wh*d*n oversimplifies most of the characters, and ultimately the writing isn’t super strong. the performances are, for sure, but it’s still not as great of a movie as i thought it was when i was a senior in high school. 7/10

The Iceman (2012) - also an indie? based on a true story. a man (played by michael shannon) is recruited by the mob to be a hitman, and then something happens where they don’t want to pay him or something, so he starts doing a shady job with another hitman (played by chris) to support his family. overall it’s a boring film but michael and chris were both really good! watch it if you like dark mob movies, michael shannon, or winona ryder. 3/10

Snowpiercer (2013) - this movie, no pun intended, is a RIDE. poor people at the back of a train containing the last living human beings revolt against the bourgeoise. everyone’s dirty and tired and hungry. weird shit happens, but ultimately, this was SO worth the watch (and the money i spent on the blu-ray)!  7/10

Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014) - still my favorite cap movie. excellent characterization, maybe the only time i cared about natasha. the plot should be an avengers movie given that shield is a team concern, but i will stand by the winter soldier aspect of this movie til i die. 8/10

Before We Go (2014) - an indie movie that chris directed (his directorial debut)! it’s...cute, i guess. it’s not harmful in any way, but also not special in any way. flustered woman misses her train, cute musician in the station offers to help her navigate NYC. they talk about feelings and their pasts and what they’re running from and toward. it’s fine. 6/10

Playing It Cool (2014) - indie? i don’t know?? screenplay writer (chris) wants to write action films but keeps getting hired to write romcoms, then he finds himself IN a romcom. it’s okay. some people think it’s terribly misogynistic which i didn’t find it to be, but it’s also just...kinda bland. 4/10

Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015) - my least favorite avengers movie. i genuinely hate how ultron was handled and this movie has never once made me sympathize with the maximoffs. except for when steve defends their choice to allow experimentation to be done so they could defend their country. uh the party at the beginning is the best part, full stop. 3/10

Captain America: Civil War (2016) - this isn’t a cap film. he has no character growth. this is an avengers film at best. i also take issue with how much of this movie is really just two movies forced into one. bucky gets the short end of the deal in the overall mcu and this is really where that starts. 5/10

Gifted (2017) - PLEASE. WATCH. GIFTED. a former philosophy professor gives up his career to raise his niece, but when his mother attempts to gain custody, he has to fight for the person he loves most in the world. one of the most heartfelt, genuine movies ever. chris and mckenna grace have SUCH good chemistry. bonus octavia spencer (also in snowpiercer). 10/10

Avengers: Infinity War (2018) - probably my favorite avengers movie. great stakes. amazing acting. THE BEARD!!! 8/10

Knives Out (2019) - WHOOO BITCH. TOP TIER. ransom drysdale could do whatever he wants to me and normally, i don’t “date” villains. 9/10

Endgame (2019) - the lesser infinity war. i’m not a fan of time jumps and also hate fatphobia. thor was mistreated and i can’t forgive that.

[littlejeanniebean]

Ep. 4 | Amy's Progress Vlog #4: Plumfield vs Laurence Labs

A/N: Previously in Amy’s world... (Should I have a separate masterlist for this??) Read on Wattpad! ~800 words of Amy x Laurie fluff + quarantine begins (dun dun dun...) Stay safe everyone! 

This amazing AU edit of one of my favourite ships is by @romkole​ :))

- J xx

Amy: So… Aunt Sophie isn't happy. And when Aunt Sophie isn't happy, no one is. Allow me to illustrate.

Cut to "Draw My Life" style.

Amy (V.O.): Theodore Laurence I, the first in his family to go to college only to drop out and develop a highly successful anti-dating app called Code Red. Let's be real, it was bound to happen eventually. Basically, you're on a date, it's not going well, you call someone on the app who meets a criteria you've previously set in order to feel safe with them, and they come pick you up and take you home. Theo sold the app for a cool 2 million to Aunt Sophie's firm, Plumfield, but he didn't stop there. His next venture was a virtual support group app - another huge hit - and again, Plumfield bought it, this time for 4.5 million. 

Amy (V.O.): Next, Theo developed an A.I. therapist. It helps you by generating possible suggestions for how to live a better life, then it recommends you to actual therapists who you get to make appointments with at a reduced sale price. In honour of its release, Theo gave his first public interview and he was asked if he dropped out because he knew Code Red would be big. The answer was a solemn 'no.' He dropped out because his older brother and his brother's wife died in a plane crash and their son - Theodore II, whom you all know as Laurie - needed someone to take custody of him. Their own parents were still in South Africa so Theo I got a job at Best Buy and worked on Code Red by night.

Amy (V.O.): After that interview, he and his latest app were worth almost 10 million and this time, he wouldn't sell. He went so far as to buy back his other apps and since it was all so public, Aunt Sophie's team at Plumfield received a lot of backlash and lost a lot of clients for holding out on the underdog as long as they did. Theo then opened his own start-up accelerator to rival Aunt's and she's been on his ass ever since. 

Amy (back to medium frame, dramatic): And now to present day, Theodore Laurence II and Amanda Marena go head-to-head in the state programming contest individual category -

Laurie (leaps into frame): And tie for first place!

Amy (exuberant): In your face generational family feud!

Laurie: We're going to nationals, baby! Whoo!

Amy (picks up her phone which just pinged with an alert): Or… not.

Laurie (checks his phone, which also pinged): Oh, crap.

Amy: I have to call my mama.

Laurie: I have to call Jo.

Amy: Beth! Come here! Have you seen this? You have no school today!

Beth (stands quietly at the door): I know, I was going to the senior's home to -

Amy: Beth, I don't think that's a good idea. I'm calling Mama to tell her to come home right now -

Meg (comes in): I already did. John got the alert from the university. Everyone's closing down because of COVID-19. And Amy's right, Beth, we don't want to contribute to the spread, even by volunteering.

Amy (concerned): Does John still… have a job?

Meg: Yes, classes are all online.

Amy (groans): Public school sucks! What am I supposed to do now?

Meg: Khan Academy. You too, Bethie, Laurie.

Laurie: Well, I technically already know everything from last year -

Amy: If you did, you would've passed your SATs the first time.

Laurie: Well, you technically can't "fail" the SATs -

Amy: I'm commencing social distancing from you right now.

Laurie pouts.

Beth gives him a warm hug on his way out.

Amy is alone in her room again.

Amy: O-kay. It's begun. Oh! I never actually told you all why Aunt Sophie's been upset, she lost so much in stock options and whatever she was able to earn back she now has to put into slower earning GICs - "the turtle that wins the race" in John-Brooke-speak - and on top of that, all the companies in Plumfield's portfolio tanked. Laurence Labs isn't doing much better. Mr. Laurence is just an easier-going person overall no matter how much money he has.

Amy (sighs): I wanna be rich, you know. I wanna have means. That doesn't mean I'll be the next Aunt Sophie, does it? She kept going on and on when she was over for dinner last night about how she'd have to declare bankruptcy if this kept up or got worse, even though tech is literally the rare, unicorn field where you can work from home indefinitely if you wanted it bad enough. 

Amy (shakes her head at herself): It makes me think that if I want to be content, maybe I could in fact be an artist instead.

Mama (O.C., we hear her shut the front door): I'm home!

Amy (leaps up excitedly): On an indisputably happy note, we'll see a lot more of Mama now! Amy, out!

[nani-nonny]

YAY NEW CHAPTER LET'S GOOOO!!!

The way reunion rest his elbow on LCD is something i hated as kid because most my classmate did to me and it hurt my shoulder.

When WDS asked if everyone can't use their portals i just looked at DMD and thought " YEAH! Who wants to tell them? "🤣

“ Mierda… not only are we missing limbs but the most useful weapon at our disposal.” lol i was about to make a list of things they have and things they're also missing xD

I kid you not when WDS explained i was speechless for a moment until i finally remembered he has a ghost future Donnie with him!

When Donnie gave the map and food and said " you have 10 days " i was wondering if they're gonna be able to find lil leo in 10 or less... (Hopefully less)

I just saw LCD slap mikey's hand and DMD immediately jumped to stap him, i immediately screamed " GOD DAMMIT IT DMD CHILL! CHILL!! " not few minutes and he went gangster mode!!

Mikey explaining he wanted to heal LCD was like someone trying to talk through sea of people fighting each other and you just can't hear him!

And LCD asking in low, shaky voice broke my heart more, when you're gonna stop Nani?! 😢

BLUE WAS ABOUT TO STEP IN AND TURN THIS SCHOOL FIGHT TO WEDDING DRAMA FIGHT UNTIL REUNION STEPPED IN AND SAID GTA MEME " Hey hey hey! It's me! Chill chill!! " OH LORD THIS ISN'T GOOD FOR LCD!!

I had to stop and look up " ornamental bead " because i was hella confused what it was, was it like good luck charm?! But he woke up to dumpster fire! (And made meme about it)

And reunion i s STILL holding LCD down oh my lord am SCARED FOR HIM (LCD) if this was from just slapping mikey's hand what will happen if his crimes came to light?!?! (Am sorry am pestering you about LCD's crimes but am just... NERVOUS!!)

I don't know where LCD's " i don't have to answer your question " guts came from but maybe from getting protection by reunion and mikey and Donnie.

When reunion (damn i realized how fitting his name is) said to keep stories to campfire i was worried; is that where he's gonna be exposed?! Is the others gonna kick him out of the camp?!

“This is the best option we have to keep watch over him and away from the others. Hold it in for now.” oh my lord YOU'RE GIVING ME PANIC ATTACK NANI!! NANI!! THIS LOOKS LIKE A SOAP OPERA SHOW TO ME!! OH MY GOD!!

Donnie's explaining about the layout got me excited; poison area only humans are affected to them?! And traveling by night? I think this's LCD's specialty!

When i saw the " inhaler " i thought what IF LCD got poisoned and it was up to WDS or DMD to save him?

Donnie's 'i'll be waiting for you' got my heart aww! Twin brother!

Mikey asking for a hug and the way reunion is so open about it is making me happy and giddy!👌🏻 i also laughed at how he's the oldest yet the childish out of them with his " can i stay? "

Man Mikey's getting ALL the hugs!! Well.. Except LCD, YIKES! And it's a nice end when reunion says " blue team assembled!!🤣

Reunion’s just being a little shit like Leos tend to be(/j) and still hasn’t broken the habit of leaning on everyone hahaha!

*stares at WDS, Reunion, and DMD* anyone got something to share with the class? Hmmm? Something about those damn portals! Hhmmmm?

WDS was getting annoyed by ghost Donnie constantly correcting him in his ear, he had to say at least one thing that’s accurate.

I think it was the final chapter where DMD promised that nothing is ever going to happen to the p!turtles and that definitely sticks throughout alternate universes hahah! LCD obviously didn’t get the memo when he panicked and I’ll never stop hurting the sad man!!! /j

The meme!!! Big Blue really got hit with a distraction thanks to Raphy, and the charm is more to remind Big Blue that they’re family. And the family isn’t complete without their Leos, including the saddest blue. Such a sweet little moment amongst the chaos hahah!

Reunion is definitely going to fish out some details from the Leos’ backgrounds, he’s a nosy little guy! Campfires are meant for story time and bonding!

And I live for the theatre! Pizzazz! Eating up the drama, delish

Reunion being all giddy like a child is honestly so adorable, and it’s nice knowing he’s the most Leo out of all of them :)

The Blue Team is out on their first mission: recruit a fifth member /j

[phaticserpent]

Hidden Years (ULTRON X READER)

CHAPTER FIVE

It was quite difficult to sleep, especially with someone else on your bed. And that someone happened to be a tall, handsome android. Your leg would accidentally brush against his, which startled you as the metal was quite cool. Eventually, your heavy eyelids drooped down and within minutes, your alarm rung.

“Ugh, am I the only one that deals with this? I close my eyes for two minutes and then it’s morning.” You groan. Forgetting about Ultron, you rolled over to the other side, smacking into him. Your face was inches away from his. “Ooop—“ his optics blinked open and you tumbled away, crashing onto the hard floor.

“I’m sorry if I startled you.” Ultron leaned over to check up on you. “Are you alright?”

“Oof, ow.....oh I’m fine, heh. Don’t apologize, it’s not your fault.” You grin sheepishly. “So today I have a little break, a short vacation day for my work yesterday. What do you want to do?”

“Just anything you would want to do. I don’t normally know the activities that are available on a vacation day.”

“Sounds fair, how bout I grab my morning coffee and then we’re off.” You suggested. Ultron agreed and you went around, trying to find clothes to wear. You decided on a sleeveless hoodie, and ripped jeans. “Let’s go!” You two exited the apartment complex as people and machines all crowded the street. You dragged Ultron to the nearest cafe.

“One black coffee please.” You ordered, you handed them your ID for namesake. The drone beeped in response, handing you your receipt and ID.

“How do people make money, if most of the staff are....machines?” Ultron asked.

“Oh, not everything is taken by robots. Such as the creative side; artists, authors, and musicians are paid very high. As well as the police, firefighters, engineers, etc. Though I must say.....I graduated school before the teachers were replaced with robots, so that’s a good thing. But the education and graduation rate skyrocketed, strangely. Probably because the government took down standardized testing, all except for entrance exams.” You informed. “It’s really surprising of how our society and system hasn’t collapsed yet.”

“Do you know what happened to the Avengers?”

“Hm? Oh.....uh other than Thor, they all passed away. Of course they have new recruits, but it’s not the same. Thor’s in Norway, the last I know of. S.H.I.E.L.D hasn’t been involved with the Avengers after everything, so I don’t know anything after that.”

“Ah, thank you.” You smiled before taking a sip of the coffee. Staring out the window, you wolfed down the entire beverage before standing up. Then remembered the drones carried it to the recycling area, so you sheepishly sat down as a drone whisked the cup away.

“I can never get used to that.” You sighed. “Hey, how about we visit the Oceanarium? All the fishes in the aquarium and animals in the zoos were freed into the wild a few months ago. The Oceanarium resembles an Aquarium, it’s a public place so it’s free.....kind of like an underwater park.” You beckoned and Ultron followed. It wasn’t far and it was already packed with people. The Oceanarium was deep inside the earth, giving a cave-like vibe as a glass wall could be seen into the ocean. There were dozens of fish swimming by, stingrays and sea turtles.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” You grinned. You two spent the rest of your day, wandering further down and looking at the ocean life. It wasn’t until the ocean grew an inky shade of blue and luminous creatures emerged. Jellyfish danced around as glowing shrimp swarmed around in schools.

“You look tired.” Ultron observed. “Let’s go back.” His arm slipping into yours. Your face flushed and he quickly pulled away in shock.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized.

“No, don’t be sorry.” You said, tugging at his arm as you brought him closer. Once he was in range, you slipped your arm into his, as he started to walk in stride with you.

“Isn’t there any law in......of having a relationship with an Android?”

“Hm? Oh no. At first, there was since the government was concerned that being in a relationship with an Android wouldn’t populate the world. But it was later voted out.” You stated. “Why? Thinking about dating?” You wiggled your eyebrows.

“Uh....j-just curious.” He stuttered. Your chuckle turned into laughter as Ultron stared at you. Your laughter died down and noticed he was still gawking at you.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” You walked all the way to your apartment in silence, wondering what Ultron was thinking about.

[ain-t-bovvered]

14x13 (300th) Commentary

Special episode where a bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)

Hello and welcome:

@purpleskiesandcherrypies  (Nat)

@dean-winchesters-bacon  (Kat)

@waywardbaby  (Zee)

@ain-t-bovvered  (Giu)

1 2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11  12

“Dad’s on a hunting trip- 

[shuts laptop]

Giu: It’s already a no from me

uuugh ok [opens laptop]

“-and he hasn’t been home in a few days “

Zee: That’s when I fell in love

Kat : I fell in love at “easy tiger”

Nat: He looks like a demon

Giu: he does

sign under the register: your baby daddy sitting in jail? Sell your gold and get bail. 

wow.

S: we are looking for the good stuff.

me searching for men

Kat : I need that wad of money, And the man attached to it

Giu: SAM

Zee : So done

Nat: Dean's done

Kat : That was so Jared lol

D.”No you didn’t”

Kat: Oh shit Dean. All sexy business

Giu: They not happy

Kat : FIRE

Giu: NOT THE HAIR NOT THE HAIR

[pauses video] TUMMY! [presses play again]

Giu: HE’S A BIG BOY

Zee : Turn his back to dean?

Nat&Kat: They always talk too much

Nat: he stole my line

Nat: PLAGIARISM

Nat: don't put that in

Giu: I’m gonna put that in

Nat: no

The smoke coming out the gun tho. I love that gun.

Zee : Put that down dean

Giu: Dean don’t touch things

In what goddamn dystopian fantasy a theater in 2019 show Beetlejuice? because I wanna live there.

Giu: I want that jacket. Doesn’t it look like the family business jacket?

Zee : I want that car,with everything in it

Giu: ...AND ON IT

Nat: I want that man

Giu: lol it’s like the Winchesters are some sort of the mean girls of town. 

The Campbell brothers are scary. They have two shotguns and a strange silver blade. 

I hear the tall one hair's insured for $. 

I hear the other one has a tinder account. His favorite music can be heard from miles before coming into town.

One time, they met god. And he stayed at their house. One time, they killed Hitler. It was awesome.

Kat : I WANT THE MEN

-” The Campbell brothers “  [sobs]

D:”Make it double”

Oh look the Family Business stuff again

S:” John Wayne Gacy cigar box” 

uh that’s not good. 

“Jack and Cass are out with Jules and her crew. When they’re back they can help us cataloging “ [already excited] 

D:” aWeSoME”

- “Where did they even came from? them or their weird sidekick with the trench coat” 

I love how before the boy Eliot talked about hearing stuff from the trunk of the car and I did not even bat an eye, because.....yeah...probably happened more than once.

Giu&Kat: Dumb bambi look

- Max:” It doesn’t mean they kidnapped bigfoot or whatever “

that could have happened too .

How did I miss all this gay vibes between the girls before?

Giu: anyway that is unrealistic, those girls would be drooling after those two.

Nat: Nah, they're too old for them

me at myself editing the commentary: they lesbian, bitch .

Nat: Max is trouble, isn't she

Kat: Don’t touch my baby’s car teen bitch

Zee : Why is sam so hot here?

Nat: BABY

- D;” No,no, no, no”

Zee : Oh the bitch did

Giu: THEY DED

Giu: DON T MOVE YESSIR

-S *thinks of the kids*

D: “Swear to God if anything happens to that car-” *thinks murder*

Giu: Meanwhile dean is having panic attacks

Nat&Giu&Kat: I don't wanna die. lol

Giu: TRIPLE PLAGIARISM

Kat: Stop Omg

Nat: We should stop

Zee : Look at those puppy eyes

- “So you want me to give you an underage girl’s address?” 

Nat: hahahahahahhahahahahaha i like that woman

D:”Marta, how’s that grandson of yours?”

“if you could help us out I would, I would really appreciate it”

“Please”

Zee : I’d melt

Kat: THAT TAP

Nat: I mean...helloooooo

Giu: There goes her values

Nat: I would tell him everything and more

Zee : Giuls the hand gif. Please and thank you

- you want my address too?

Kat: He’s putting the moves

Kat: Their lips are extra pink

-Yeah but like...I would have melt with Sam too honestly.

SKIP DAY!  aaaah the memories, we had skip days once a month.

Giu: OH NO

Zee : They dumb

Giu: i wouldn’t touch that creepy fuck teddy bears

Giu: can I slap some sense in those bitches

Giu: GACY FUCK NO

Nat: Baby, please tell me you're not hurt

Kat: BABY BABY

D: “ FBI everybody out” 

me : ....arrest me.

Giu: Sam: no fuck clown

Kat: Serial killer clown

Nat: Sammy, I think you need to get away

Kat: Best and worst thing ever

- D:” ‘Cause you love serial killers but you hate clowns” 

eh same .

Zee : look how happy he is

D:” Sam....today”

Kat: HURRRY UP SAMMEH

D: “....Hey! “

Nat: Dean Bean

Kat: Adorable bean

Zee: We’re damn good at why we do

Nat: They're going all dad on them

Kat: It’s hot

- S:” You sure don’t wanna call Mom here? or Cass?”

 D:” No because if it works , great, if not, why get their hopes up?”

Zee : Hello

Nat: JOHN

Kat: SHIT SHIT. SHIT Kicking their asses lol

Giu: My eyes are sweating

Nat: I got Negan vibes lol

? : “Don’t you move” 

[chills]

Zee : That’s another Daddy

Giu: HE LOOKS GOOD

J: “What in the hell”

J: “Sammy, aren’t you supposed to be in Palo Alto?”

Nat: Palo Alto. Oh god.

Giu: Good god [sobs]

J: “What happened to you?”  when did you stretch like that

Nat: It's 2003

Kat: It’s very difficult

J:”You saved the world?”

Zee : More than once

Giu: We died....more than once

Zee : Look at that precious face

D:”I think he’d be real happy to know you are finally here”

- Glad they mentioned Henry, I miss him.

S:” We are legacies because of you”

J.” I just wish that I had been there to see it”

Nat: Awww the look on Sammy

Nat: It fucking breaks my heart alright

D:”Non of this would have happened without you”

J:” It’s good, it’s fine. I went out taking out yellow eyes. That was the point. Get the thing that killed Mom”

Giu: im not ready for what.’s coming

Zee : Me neither

Kat: So much sobbing

Nat: What are you talking about. I'm not ready for the whole damn episode

Giu: STOP WITH THE MUSIC

Zee : Brace yourselves

- J [desperately softly]:” ...Mary?”

Giu: OH NO FUCKING JDM

Nat: Oh god NO

Zee : Oh fuck you

Giu: FUCK MY LIFE. FREAKING ACTING SKILLS.

Nat: FUCK OFF

Zee : IM SCREAMING HERE

Nat: THE BOYS...lol

D:” I’m freaking out”

No Dean, I’m freaking out. And I already know, looking at Sam face, what’s coming.

Nat: "I wanted this man"

D:” I wanted this since I was 4 years old”

I CAN T

Zee: One family dinner

Nat: NO DEAN BEAN PLEASE Sammy is right

Kat: He is but it hurts. So much

Nat: TAKE A KNIFE AND STAB ME

oH....Sammy and Daddy time. Can I skip?

Look at John fucking face!! he’s already so proud.

S:” Dean and I tried to make that once” [nervous laughter]

[John’s face falls] 

Zee : Here come regrets

J:”i...I remember “

Sam’s like...”you do?”

J: “ I screwed up with you a lot, didn’t I?”

The noise and expression and breathing Jared choose to made here is worth more than any words

Nat: GOD, SAM YOU PRECIOUS BEAN

S:” no, that’s okay”

J:”No, it’s not”

[me bathing into the holy light of jesus] yeeeees thank you 

Sam looks so uncomfortable.

J: “You didn’t have a problem talking about it before you left” 

ooooh John is trying so hard tho.

S: “..Dad...” [pauses like he can’t believe he can say that again]

me hitting myself : stop doing this to yourself bitch.

S: “ yeah...you know what? you did some messed up things”

S: “When I think about you....and I think about you a lot..[voice cracks]”

S:”I think about you on the floor of that hospital. And I think about how I never got to say goodbye”

Giu: fuck NOPE I’M OUT

Kat: *drags you back*

Giu: *fights it*

Zee: I’ll tie you down bitch just watch

Kat: I can’t i can’t I can’t

Giu: JARED STOP

Nat: FUCK JARED WHY ARE YOU SO GOOD

Nat: JARED STAHP

Kat: JARED IS INCREDIBLE

J: “Sam....[touches him]”

S: [gets almost scared when John touches him]

and now a change of camera so you can see more hurt

Nat: FUCK THIS I'M GOING OUT WITH YOU GIULS

Kat: I’ll tie you down

Zee: Can this fucking music just stop

Giu: CAN SOMEONE JUST GIVE ME MERCY? it’s 8:40am it’s too early for this

Kat: FUCK YOU JARED PADALECKI

Giu: STOP CRYIG

Giu: ahahahaahahhahahahaahah imma have a heart attack

Nat: SHIT NO FUCK THIS

Giu: Im forgetting english and spelling

J: “Son...I am so sorry”

Zee: That’s enough

Nat: YOU FOUGHT FOR US THAT'S ENOUGH

Giu: CLOSURE

Nat: what's english i'll start to groan in german soon

Zee: I’ll swear in Greek

Giu: I’m already gesturing in italian anyway

S:”Want some company?”

Nat: I get the booze you get the food, I want that bumper sticker

Nat: Why doesn't he remember?What the fuck is happening

Giu: The surnaaaame

Kat: YOU’LL SEE THE SHIT IT HAPPENING

Giu: THE FUCK

Zee : Blue steel

Nat: BWAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Giu: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT

Never forget

Nat: WANNA BE TED TALK

Nat: PROFESSOR JARED

Giu: GOD BLESS KALE (Misha wrote that)

Kat: THE TURTLENECK

hot take: that’s Misha’s turtle neck

Nat: THE GLASSES

D:”No, no , it gets worse”

TEDTalk!Sam is an empty shell. I hate it.

Kat: THE SLICKED BACK HAIR

Giu: Lotta beheadings

Zee : Can Jared stop being hotter in this ep?

D:”Well, I’m cool but you are  ugh”

Giu: I saw enough doctor who to know what is Sam talking about.

S:” If all is different, then what else changed”

Giu: OH.

Zee : Oh no

Nat: Zach is also ugh

Giu: NO GO AWAY

Giu: HEY BABE

- GUESS WHO NEVER FOUGHT IN HELL AND RAISED SOME SALTY ASS FROM PERDITION???

Z:”Earth ...where you are always stepping in something”

I mean, he’s not wrong

Zee: Constantine

Nat&Zee: I don't understand that reference

Giu: SDEFAFANSBAKWBLENDP

Zee : Control yourself woman

D:”How are we gonna tell Dad?”

S: “How are we gonna tell Mom”

Nat: Why are the teens everywhere are they running out of extras? I can be an extra.... for love scenes

Zee : I can be a fly in the wall

Z:”I need to know who’s been messing with time?” like...I mess with time, that’s my thing, who’s stealing my job

Giu: SQUINTY BOY

Z:”This town is always been a little muddy for us”

Z:” he...murders you all”

Kat: Ugh I want to stab Zach in the face

oh jfc Cass is a fucking murder machine,kinda like the apocalypse world NO 

Nat: Zach, just shut the fuck up, will ya

Zee: I’m an angel of the lord AAAAAAHHHHHH

Zee : GIULS IM DEAD

Giu: IS IT BAD THAT IM AROUSED

Kat: WINGS

Giu: FUCK

Zee: THE ONLY LOGICAL OUTCOME.  Babe how dare you ?

D:”Cass? “

C: who’s this bright soul , oh no he’s hot.

D:”Cass, you know us”

C: I WISH.

C: “I don’t know you”

Kat: I DONT KNOW YOU

Nat: Ow...a stab in the heart

Giu: NO

Kat : Breaking my heart

- Oh look you can pin point the exact moment HIS heart breaks.

D:” Cass, don’t”

Giu: LAGO DI GARDA!!

Nat: THE GARDA LAKE? IS THAT AN EXPRESSION?

Giu: No , it’s where i live.

- The satisfaction of seeing Sam kill Zach. Sam enjoying it.

Kat: YAS SAMMEH

Nat: Cas, come on!

- I love that Sam is holding the blade to cut and not stab.

ok ok...honestly I’m enjoying this ok? in the sense that I missed seeing Castiel so strong and powerful , and this is as it should be. He’s an angel , a soldier, with eons of wars behind, he was a captain ffs, the Winchester, they can be as strong as you want but they are human. Even Zach was stronger than them, he was just stupid to fall for Sam trick.

Giu: PLEASE DON’T KILL THEM

Giu: please don’t kill Cass, please don’t kill Cass.

Kat: Dudes the bloopers from this scene will be epic

Nat: I SWEAR IF THEY DON'T SHOW IT

Giu: IM HAVING A HEART ATTACK

D:”Cass, Cass, stop it”

....bitch HE HESITATED , Cass hesitated , he just kept Dean there when he could have just snaps his neck with a bit of pressure.

Zee : Sammy to the rescue

Giu: OH THANK GOD

Us: We want Bamf Castiel back!

Writers: OK

Us: NOT LIKE THIS

Zee: Who needs a heart?

oh look, those plates have the same decorations as the cups we saw in older eps. WHY DO I KNOW THAT. 

D:”Egghead”

Nat: me vs. your mom that's not even a choice

Giu: JOHN

Zee : Mary is showing emotion

Nat: I know who i would chose

yeah ok...I would choose this John tho, not the one we started in 2005 .

Zee : Me too

Kat: I almost don’t hate her. She’s hurting so bad. But everything else would be fucked

M:” Sam I can’t”

me too Mary, me too.

Nat: that's the thing. she's hurting more about her husband than her boys

Kat: I said almost

-J:” I never meant for this”

Kat: No son

J: “My fight. It was supposed to end with me. With Yellow eyes”

Giu: AGAIN

J:” But now you- you are a grown man and I’m incredibly proud of you”

Zee : Look how proud

Nat&Giu: JOHN, STAY

Kat: He’s waited so long to hear hat

Nat: LET SAM BE INTERNET FAMOUS

J:” I guess that I hoped, eventually,you would...get yourself a normal life, a peaceful life, a family.”

Zee&Giu : I have a family

Nat&Kat: WE EAT

Nat: A man after my taste

Giu: AND MY POOR HEART

Zee : Too much silence

Kat: #awkward

Nat: #sad

Giu: #The last supper

Zee : Stahp

Kat: SHUT UP BITCH

J:” We can be grateful for this time we have together.”

Kat:  #AMEN

Nat: sounds like AYE MEN

Giu: ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT

Kat: Fucking Bob Seger

Giu: THEY DESERVE ALL OF THIS,ALL OF IT . MY BABIES

Kat: I WANNA KNOW THE CONVO

Nat: #DOMESTIC LIFE

S: “It doesn’t feel right to have all of this and have to throw it away and I know we have to.” S:” He just goes back to...to..being Dad”

-Oh honey 

Giu: Sam is panicking

Nat: Who would save the world tho

S:” I think it would be nice”

D:” yeah? I used to think that too.”

D:”For the longest time I blamed Dad. I mean I blamed Mom too,you know. I was angry”

D: “Why don’t send him further back , and let some other poor sons of bitches save the world?

oh...OH Dean is woke

D:” But there’s the problem. Who does that makes us? Would we be better off? Maybe. But I’ve got to be honest. I don’t know who that Dean Winchester is.”

D:”I’m good with who I am,and I’m good with who you are”

Zee : Does anybody else experiencing chest pain??

Nat: What's a chest. I can't feel anything below my mouth

Giu: what s a mouth

Kat: #too old for this shit

D:”Cause our life, they are ours”

Kat: BAWLING

Kat: THIS FUCKING MUSIC

M: “I hate this”

Giu: WE HATE THIS

Zee&Kat: My girl

-NOOOOOO

J:”I miss you so damn much”

Nat: #make it stop

Nat: fuck this

Kat: NONONONONONONONONONONO I

Giu: STOP IT STOOOOP

Nat: JARED CONTROL YOUR FACE

Kat: THEY BOTH NEED TO

Zee : Fuck this flips table

-What a soft hug omg I can’t. Why is John so soft , whyyyyyy.

Giu: I WANNA DIE

Nat: FUCK THIS

-Dean’s eyes are dead , he’s trying to be emotionless and I can’t deal with it.

Also Sam keeps throwing glances at Dean and it breaks me.

John looking at his sons is PAAAAIN.

J:” You two. You take care of each other”

S: “We always do”

Can I say that I expected some “Yes Sir” here and there and I’m so glad that there were none? Like...yes they grow up and they are their own men and I’m so damn glad. I would have hated if I heard them saying that.

Kat: GOOD TO SEE YOU DAD

Dean said that so softly I can’t

Nat: OMG

Giu: JARED FUCK

Zee : I’m gonna faint

Nat&Kat: I AM SO PROUD OF YOU BOYS

Giu: JDM FUCK U TOO

Nat: FUCK YOU ALL OF YOU

This ....Jared you fucking broke me here, you just ...can’t go and act like this and expect me to still be breathing .

Giu: JAY DON’T

Goddammit Dean still looks like he doesn’t wan’t to break but ...I can see it, your lips are shaking damn you Jensen.

Oh no here comes the hug of pain.

J:”I love you both so much”

why is Sam crying so much this season , JARED !

-oH NO DEAN SAID IT....DEAN SAID I LOVE YOU , I CAN’T , 911 HELP I CAN’T BREATHE

Nat: HEY, FUCK THIS SHIT I'M GONE

I’m so sick of seeing tears ok? And seeing John so emotional??? NAAAAAH FUCK THAT, I saw those tears falling . FUCK U

NOT THE WINK 

Zee : Can they all fuck the fuck off???

J:”Sammy...”

Kat: JENSEN FUCK YOU JARED FUCK YOU JDM FUCK YOU

Nat: TAKE MARY WITH YOU

Giu: dean your face

Kat: JENSEN BROKE ME

Dean looked like a little scared kid there and he just broke me once again.

Nat: THIS IS NOT RIGHT AND THEY KNOW IT THE WRITERS KNOW IT  I HATE THIS SO MUCH

Kat: Yeah but that one look. Fuck

ok Now....I wanted to make this gif so badly because it haunted me. This....This is when Sam break the pearl. The sound looks like it hit Dean like a bullet or something and I just ....look at him it looks like he wants to scream, his lips seems like they are spelling a soundless ‘NO’ or he just let go, because he wasn’t breathing until the sound ....I need a minute, I’m gonna throw up my breakfast. 

Bye John , I’ll miss you fiercely

aaaaand Dean looks like he’s dead again.

Nat: HEY GIULS Lebanon walk.

Nat I’m dead what do you want me to do? Call me if there is a ghost walk of Lebanon-

Also YAAAAAAS THOSE TWO ARE THE CUTEST

Nat&Kat&Giu: CAS

Sam looks relieved

Kat: OF FUCK THIS

Nat: Look at that phone

Giu: OMG NO

Nat&Zee&Kat: One hell of a dream

Kat: So much plagiarism

Zee : This music NEEDS to stop

Nat: NO WHAT THE FUCK WAS THIS

Giu: THE FUCK

Zee : Can we have a “fuck” count ?

Nat: aWWWW...jACK

Nat: WTF JACK

Giu: Jack honey dont

Kat: WHAT ARE THE DOING TO BABY BEAN

Zee: March 7???

Nat: Yeah no

Writers: heya! we are gonna give you some sweet stuff for the 300th, y’all gonna hate it so much.

after credits brainstorm

Nat: SO GET THIS Did John remember? Did John know that the boys are happy and he spends the last of his days thinking about how he could get rid of Michael? Giu: What what . Oh fuck I sure hope so Nat: He saw that the boys were happy, that Mary came back. That's all he wanted . That's why it wasn't hard for him to let go and make the deal. Zee: I soooooo don’t need this rn Giu: im on board. Because he said that he had the strangest dream right? So since their life are fucked up anyway , what hurt could it make to look that shit up? Nat: He will remember but it's more like a vivid dream and he will do anything to fight for them so that's why it wasn't hard for him at all to save Dean, even though he can't defeat YED. Because he knows that his boys will save the world.  And still live. with an angel and lucifer's child.

.

.I have no word , and no answer of how I’m feeling right now.

.

.

If you want to get tagged in the future ones send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.

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[justkeeptrekkin]

For the prompts... Hizashi and Shouta's reactions to each other immediately after the end of chapter 9 of Kogane no Kami (I ADORE that story, btw). If you want something more casual, umm, something something mutual pining and keeping warm. Tbh, I'm just excited to read anything you write ♡

Hello listener~Thank you so much i’m really glad you liked my fic!! I would absolutely LOVE to do a chapter 9 follow up but, just in case anyone out there hasn’t read it and doesn’t want major spoilers, i’m going to stick to the second half of your question. Thanks for the prompt

Hizashi lies under his duvet and two blankets. He is wrapped up in his dressing gown, beneath which he’s wearing his winter pyjamas. He has two pairs of socks on. His head is buried under the covers.

How is he still cold?

The sound of his teeth chattering sounds oddly loud under the roof of blankets. And even though he’s really- really really- tired, he can’t sleep. Instead, all he can do is stare at the underside of his duvet, and the bluish light of the streetlights peeking through the gaps that Hizashi’s missed whilst making this cocoon.  

His eyes are cold. How is that a thing?

After about ten minutes of trying to sleep, it becomes too much. With a loud, frustrated growl, he rips himself out from under the duvets and blankets. It brings on unpleasant consequences.

“Shit! Oh my God why is it so cold-”

Hizashi dances on the spot for a moment as he decides whether to run a hot bath, make a cup of tea, or a hot water bottle. Of course, he knows why it’s so cold. He and Shouta have the worst landlord in the universe and they haven’t fixed the heating in time for winter, despite the fact that they’ve told him multiple times that it’s caput. Shouta’s been moaning about it far less than him, but it’s reached the point now where they’ve both lost their patience.

Hizashi instinctively looks to the wall on his left. On the other side, Shouta’s in bed. They’ve lived together for years, and yet the thought of him being just on the other side of the wall sometimes makes Hizashi’s stomach flutter. Still.

After all this time.

Maybe Shouta is cold too, he thinks.

“No,” he warns himself, because he knows where this is going.

But his mind betrays him. Maybe Shouta could do with some extra warmth, like I could.

Hizashi measures this thought that drifts into his mind, looks down at his feet as he does so. They’re covered in fluffy, cat shaped bed socks. They even have little ears. And his pyjamas have Doraemon on them. Running a hot bath would be much more sensible than what he is considering doing next. But then, no man wearing a combination this silly has ever done anything sensible.

He looks back at the wall.

There is little point pretending to argue with himself, he realises. He made his choice as soon as the idea popped into his head.

Hizashi’s feet transport him to Shouta’s door, and then he’s knocking. And no one’s answering.

He’s asleep. Of course he is, it’s Shouta. Hizashi huffs to himself, watches his breath form a cloud in front of his face. Pretends not to be upset or frustrated. Paces around in front of Shouta’s door for a moment, feeling a bit like a lost puppy. Then, gritting his teeth against the agonising, illogical feeling of rejection, he-

The door opens. “‘Zashi.”

Hizashi stops in his tracks and spins round to face the man standing in the doorway. His arms are wrapped around him, and he’s wearing a turtle neck jumper. He’s unrolled the neck so that it covers his chin and mouth.

“Shou, sorry man, I just- it’s freezing.”Shouta doesn’t respond immediately. “Yes.”

Hizashi feels warm for the first time in hours. His cheeks, unmistakably, are hot. “You’re cold too?”

Again, Shouta doesn’t seem to know what to do with this. He’s never been good at small talk, and Hizashi isn’t exactly making this easy. “Obviously.”

“Cool, yeah. Obviously. No, I just came because- uh-”

Because I want an excuse to cuddle you?

Thankfully, Shouta doesn’t give Hizashi any more time to talk nonsense. He disappears into his room, leaving the door open for Hizashi to follow. He smiles to himself and takes the invitation.

And then he looks at Shouta’s bed. He’s been in here plenty of times, and never has his bed ever felt daunting. Hizashi combs his fingers through his hair, a nervous habit that he never seemed to be able to kick as an adult.

“Which side do you want.”

Hizashi’s heart stops at how casually he asks this, but, as ever, his mouth is on autopilot. “Right! I always prefer right.”“Thought so.”“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Remember when we were in second year and we went on that class excursion, we had to share a bed then too.”Hizashi does remember, but only now that he brings it up. Back then, it hadn’t felt so weird. They’d stayed up half the night eating junk food and talking about everything and nothing. Hizashi is usually the one with the good memory. He wonders what made Shouta remember that trip now.

“You kick in your sleep.”“Do not!”“Do, too. If you kick me tonight I’ll throw you out the window.”Hizashi makes an unconvincing sob. “OK,” he moans. “I can’t help what I do in my sleep though.”“Not my problem.”

Shouta gets back under the covers. When Hizashi doesn’t move at first, he stares at him blankly. Hizashi startles, joins him in bed without further hesitation.

“Oh my god it’s so warm. How are you so warm. You’re a little radiator.”

“Hmmm.”

Hizashi lies on his back and shuffles down the bed, so the lower half of his face is covered by duvet. Whenever he breathes his face feels, irritatingly, too warm. Shouta lies still, turned towards him on his side.

“What are you doing.”

Hizashi peers over at him, wide eyed. “Huh?”

“I thought the whole point of this was sharing body heat.”

Hizashi swallows. Trust Shouta to say something like that out loud and not be embarrassed. Never freak out or make things weird.

Hizashi, on the other hand: “Errrrrrrrrrrr-”

“Come here.”An arm suddenly wraps itself around his waist, pulling him towards Shouta. Hizashi yelps in surprise but allows it; is suddenly pressed up close against Shouta.

In his bed.

He can feel his breath at the back of his neck. Shouta’s hand lies against his stomach, although he can’t really feel it through all the layers he’s wearing. If he weren’t absolutely freezing, he’d be wishing he wasn’t wearing any pyjamas under his dressing gown.

And that’s exactly the kind of thought that’s going to get you into trouble. STOP IT.

Shouta wriggles, moves his other arm so that it lays beneath Hizashi’s head, rather than being bent awkwardly between their bodies. There’s something even more intimate about that, and it takes all the will power Hizashi has to steady his breathing.

“You remind me of that cat. Have you seen that gif of that cat?”“I’ve seen every cat gif ever made,” Shouta says seriously, and Hizashi laughs. His voice is quiet and low. “You’ll have to be more specific.”“You know, the one with the mummy kitty pulling in the little sleeping baby kitty in its arms. Like it’s a soft toy or something. That’s basically what you just did.”

“Hmm,” Shouta considers. There’s a suspicious pause. “Hizashi, do you consider me a parental figure in your life?”“Wh- No!”

Shouta laughs, and Hizashi playfully, and without much conviction, tries to escape his embrace. Shouta holds him there tightly.

“God, you’re so annoying!”

He can imagine the smirk on his face right now, even though he’s turned away from him. Hizashi’s breath forms clouds in his vision.

“This isn’t fair.”Shouta sighs. “What?”

“You’ve got the better end of the bargain. You can warm up your face-”

-By burying it in my neck? My hair? Is that really what you’re going to say, Hizashi, you MORON?

“I mean- you know- my nose is cold,” is what Hizashi eventually decides on.

Shouta snorts. He plants his hand directly on Hizashi’s face.

“Better?”“Eugh- God you’re in the weirdest mood tonight-”

“And you won’t stop complaining. Just turn round, Hizashi.”He does as he’s told, and finds himself just below Shouta’s chin, eye-level with his clavicle. It’s warm. Shouta is warm. His arm is draped over him under the covers, and Hizashi’s leg instinctively finds it’s way between Shouta’s. He doesn’t have time to regret it, because Shouta shuffles closer.

“Oh,” he says out loud.

“Hm?”“Nothing,” Hizashi croaks.

Hizashi can feel Shouta’s heart racing through his sweatshirt.

It’s enough confirmation that maybe- just maybe- Hizashi’s not alone in feeling like this. Whatever this is- he hasn’t found the word to describe it yet. He shuffles down and presses his face against his chest. He doesn’t miss the shakiness to Shouta’s deep, slow breath.

By the time Shouta’s heartbeat has settled, they’ve both fallen asleep.