#so I started treating it like an original work and the characters like OCs | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cepheusgalaxy · 2 months

Text

"So, you wanna make them ace?"

Asexuality 101: Making your characters asexual

Indroduction: Ok, so, from what I've seen in fandom and in general, most people don't really know how to write an asexual character. Many just quit it and make them allosexual, others just struggle their way without having much of a guide. Prime example is Alastor from Hazbin Hotel, whom many people want to involve in sexual scenarios so they go with the "asexuality is a spectrum" route. Problem is, they don't understand how asexuality is a spectrum exactly and then they just end up writing their characters as allo. Now, how to avoid this? Teaching them!

If you're looking for a good way to get started with your own asexual oc, an ace headcanon or a media charater, I've got you! (i mention sex briefly here in some parts)

My credentials: I'm ace.

The basics

What is asexuality?

Asexuality is a sexual orientation that is generally defined by the lack of sexual attraction, or a very little amount of it. Sexual attraction is many times confused with libido, which is the sexual desire. Sexual attraction is more accurately, "the desire of having sex with this specific person." Therefore, some ace people do have a libido, and do want to have sex, but mostly are just not attracted to a person.

Myths and misconceptions

Asexuals can't have sex - as many shippers say, "asexuality is a spectrum", and while some aces don't have sex indeed, they can want it and have it as well. Person to person scenario

Asexuals don't know nothing about sex - unless the ace in question is a child, they probably may know, in fact, a lot. Many ace people like reading, watching or consuming smut, and by this and other means, even if they don't have sex themselves, they pretty much know how it is and how it works. Sex is everywhere, after all. Hard to miss

Asexuality is caused by trauma - it can be! Just not always, and most aces are simply born this way

Asexuality is a medical condition - much like homosexuality, asexuality is frequently treated as an illnes and many ace people are forced into conversion therapy. Some people also hold the belief that asexuality is caused by an anormality in a person's hormones, a mental illness, etc. But it is not true! Asexual people can obviously also be mentally ill in some way, but these are different things. It is just a sexual orientation like any other!

Asexuality is caused by HRT - hormone replacement therapy, ie. taking testosterone or estrogen, is one of the most common type of medical transition for trans people. Some hold the belief that taking hormones like those can "break" your sexuality (estrogen does sometimes decrease a person's libido, but it depends on the person's organism and it doesn't take your sexual attraction away from you), and turn you asexual

Asexuality is caused by autism - this myth may be originated from the fact that many autistic people are in fact asexual, or by the fact that both asexuals and autistic people tend to be infantilized a lot. However, as much as autistic people are very commonly also ace, asexuality is not, in fact, a symptom of autism

Basic terminology

Ace - short for "asexual".

Aro - short for "aromantic"; someone who experiences little to no romantic attraction, aka typically "doesn't fall in love".

Allo - somebody who does experience attraction. "Allosexual" is someone who is not asexual, and "alloromantic" is someone who is not aromantic.

Aspec - short for "a-spectrum". The a-spectrum is an umbrella term for anyone who is in any way ace, aro, aplatonic, afamilial, or other identities that fit here.

Acespec - short for "asexual spectrum/ace spectrum". It's a part of the a-spectrum and contemplates all asexuality.

Aesthetic attraction - finding someone pretty or beatiful, without necessarily wanting to have sex with them. Many ace people who didn't know they were ace report to having used to mistake it with sexual attraction.

Sensual attraction - similar to sexual attraction; the desire to touch someone, but without wanting to actuall have sex with them. Many ace people also confused this with sexual attraction.

Aphobia - discrimination against aspec people.

Amatonormativity- the belief that everybody is happier in a relationship, wether they want it or not, and should want and seek to be in one, and the general root of aphobia.

The Split Attraction Model

If you are looking on the ace community for a while, you might have heard of the split attraction model--if you haven't, here it is:

Image description: The Split Attraction Model, a cross chart inside a square, with four ends. The first end of the cross is labelled "ace", its opposite is labelled as "alloce", the third end is labelled as "alloro" and it's opposite is labelled as "aro". The section on the "alloro" and "ace" square is labelled "alloromantic asexual", the section in the "ace" and "aro" part is labelled "aromantic asexual", the section on the "alloro" and "alloce" square is labelled as "alloromantic allosexual" and the section on the "aro" and "alloce" section is labelled "aromantic allosexual". /end ID.

The split attraction model divides all orientations in four groups: The aroaces, the aroallos, the alloaces and the alloallos. It is usually shortened to "SAM".

Many people find this model useful, because it sorts your attraction into two groups: allo- and a-, and yes and no. It's simple and easy.

Many aces do not use this model to explain their attraction/lack thereof though! Hence the first distinction of aces we have here: SAM-aces and non-SAM-aces. Basically aces who use the Split Attraction Model and aces who prefer not to!

A non-SAM ace may define their asexuality as their romantic orientation as well, or label themselves differently altogether. While a SAM ace could call themselves an "asexual aromantic" or an "asexual alloromantic", a non-SAM ace could call themselves just "an asexual". In this case, they can be neither "alloro" nor "aro".

If your character is aware of their sexuality and identifies as ace, it's good to know wether they use the Split Attraction Model for themselves or not.

The spectrum

You may have heard that "asexuality is a spectrum" a thousand times, but what does it mean?

Just like "non-binary", "asexual" can be an identity on its own, but it is actually an umbrella term for a bunch of orientations. When we say that it is a spectrum, we are saying that there is Nuance. "Ace who doesn't date", "ace who dates", "ace who experiences just a little bit of sexual attraction", "aces who like sex" and so on. 'But Angel', you ask me, 'didn't you say that asexuality is when people don't have sexual attraction?' It can be! But there IS nuance, and that's what I am here to tell you.

There are two more factors beyond the SAM that you can consider:

"Are they sex repulsed, sex favorable, or sex neutral?"

Here is the "aces can still have sex" thing. A sex repulsed ace is probably what the majority of people think when they hear "asexual". It is an ace person who doesn't like sex. Doesn't want to have it, is disgusted by it, despises sexual intimacy, etc. They are the aces who tipically just don't want to have sex, and are very happy without it.

A sex favorable asexual is someone who likes it. Sure, they don't feel sexual attraction, but who's letting it stop them, right? They like sexual acts, they are fine and happy with having sex in general, and that's what the "aces can still have sex" point means. Yes, they can, if they want to! Maybe your character themself doesn't define themselves as neither repulsed nor favorable, but it's good to know what their instance on sex is.

Sex neutral asexuals are aces who are not repulsed by it, but are not really into it either. They may have sex, they may be fine with it, they may like it even, but they generally don't have a desire or strong feelings regarding it. It's just sex, after all.

Sex ambivalent asexuals are another thing I want to touch on. They are tipically aces whose instance on sex changes! Sometimes they may feel repulsed by it, sometimes they may want it, sometimes they may not care. They are neither strictly one, nor another. Their feelings change!

It's good to see where in this categorization your character or blorbo would be.

Inside the asexual spectrum, where do they stand?

If I were to represent the ace spectrum as a linear thing, I'd do it like this:

Image description: A linear representation of the asexual spectrum, in the shape of an arch. In one end, it is written "asexual", on the other, it is written "allosexual" and on the very middle, at the top of the arch, it is written "gray-asexual". /end ID.

or like this:

Image description: Another linear representation of the asexual spectrum. One of the ends is a black circle and the other is a white circle. Between them, a gradient goes from one circle to another, passing through different shades of gray. The black end is labelled as "asexual", the white end is labelled as "allosexual", and the gradient with shades of gray is labelled "different kinds of Gray-As". /end ID.

What is graysexual, you ask me? We all know that the world is not black-and-white, and as so, sexuality is also not. Grayace is a term for a person that is also asexual, but not strictly: that is, they are the "feels a little of sexual attraction" part of the spectrum. It is called like that because when we put asexual and allosexual in two ends of a spectrum, graysexuality stands in this gray area.

Gray sexuals may:

Experience sexual attraction only sometimes

Experience light sexual attraction

Experience sexual attraction under certain conditions in certain scenarios, for example, when they are already very intimate with a certain person

And many more! Graysexuality is on itself a spectrum, but having an idea of allosexual -> graysexual -> strictly asexual is already a good guide. Graysexuality can also be described as "having partial sexual attraction".

Fun fact about gray-aces: The asexual flag has four stripes; purple, white, gray and black. The purple stripe is meant to be a color signifier of the community, the white means allosexual, the gray means the gray aces and the black stripe represents people with strictly no sexual attraction. Hence the term "black stripe asexual" (which is not very popular but I personally like).

Micro-labels

You already have a basic understanding of the asexual spectrum and how it works, so you can think on where exactly in the spectrum your character/blorbo is. To help you out further, I present you the microlabels! Much like non binary is an umbrella term with many microlabels like genderqueer, xenogender and demigender, that help one explain their identity with more and more specific explanations, asexuals also have a lot of microlabels! Here are some:

Cupiosexual - asexual person that wishes to have a sexual relationship (example: i am cupioromantic person and i am basically a hopeless romantic and a yearner. cupiosexuality is similar, but with sex)

Gray sexual - asexual person with partial sexual attraction

Demisexual - asexual person who can only be attracted to people they already have a bond with

Abrosexual - person whose sexuality is fluid, and may be asexual at one time, bisexual at another, gay at another, etc.

Aceflux - asexual person whose sexuality changes, like abrosexual, but only between asexual identities

Aegosexual - asexual person who likes the idea of sex or fantasises about it, as long as it doesn't envolve them

Lythosexual - asexual person who is only sexually attracted to people they are not close with, and their sexual attraction fades out once the become closer

Myrsexual - asexual person that uses multiple asexual identities to describe their sexuality

Aroace - aromantic asexual person

Alloace - alloromantic asexual person

Apothisexual - sex-repulsed asexual person

These are not all micro labels in the asexual spectrum, but they are quite a lot. Maybe even if your charater is not sure if they are in a certain label or not, you may find them in some of these descriptions.

Links to resources with more microlabels: Tumblr post by @aroacesafeplaceforall (no images) /

/ A slightly longer list on asexuals.net (undescribed flags) /

/ Another guide for microlabels on lgbtqia.fandom.com (undescribed flags)

Bonus questions

Is it okay if I make my asexual character autistic? Is it not stereotyping? Yes, it's okay. There are actual asexual autistic people, and I'm sure they'd love to get represented as well!

Is it okay if I make my asexual character have sex? Is it not erasure? Yes, you can do that too! As long as it is where they stand in the spectrum (as explained in the topics above), you are doing a good thing by representing sex-favorable asexuals.

Do I have to make a romantic orientation for them too? No. Your character may be a non-sam ace, and identify as ace alone!

I heard that it is erasure if I make smut fanfic of ace character X. I don't get it how! While it is true many ace people have sex, many people when writing that just ignore their sexuality when writing/drawing smut of them! The spectrum is wide, so when you are doing that, remember where they stand on it.

Why can't I headcanon this ace character as allosexual? I headcanon straight characters as gay/bi/pan all the time and nobody says it's wrong! If people don't like my headcanon why can't they just look away? Because asexual people are a marginalized group, unlike straight people, so it is as okay to make them allo as it is to take an asian or black or jewish character and make them white. Because it is not just an individual headcanon; it's a part of a much bigger problem, and by avoiding headcanoning ace characters as allo, you are confronting your own internalized aphobia, which is a good thing! If you still want to make them have sex, well, that's what I made this guide for! So you can make them have sex as you wish without erasing their identity.

I am ace and am basing myself or my own experiences here. Is it okay if I...? The answer is generally yes. If you wanna write about a different ace experience than your own, a little bit of research won't hurt, though!

Is this enough for me to write my ace character? It is a start. This is a general guide, and there are some things I haven't touched on this guide (like aphobia) so I'd advice you to do more in-depth research on topics you want to focus more on, but this should get you pretty far.

Extra

"Is Alastor from Hazbin Hotel canonically ace or aroace?" (slightly related, because some people looking for this guide to write this guy might want to know this too)

Answer: link to a post clearing this up this with some sources. Short answer though, is that he is confirmed to be ace, not aroace.

"If I didn't understand something here, or I have more questions, can I ask you?"

Answer: Yes! You can reblog this post with questions, and my inbox is also open, and I make sure to always let anon on. I will be happy to help if I can.

"One of the image descriptions on this post was off or confusing, can you change it to X so it is better to understand it?"

Answer: Of course! I will need you to signal me in either the notes or in the inbox what I need to change, though.

"Are asexual people queer?"

Answer: Yes! Because the queer community, as the name suggests, is for people who are different, odd, and are not considered "normal" because of that. Asexual people are not a part of "the norm", because we don't feel sexual attraction, and therefore, we, and by extension your ace characters too, are queer.

380 notes · View notes

shalotttower · 4 months

Text

Cultivating Flowers

Title: Cultivating Flowers

Fandom: Original

Summary: Marquis is a man of many interests, including gardening. Specifically, his new roses.

Word count: 3500+

Characters: OC!Marquis x Reader (female)

Notes: yandere!OC, manipulation, animal cruelty (not detailed, briefly described), seduction.

The first bloom appears two weeks after spring starts and it's the most glorious flower in all Marquis' garden. Gentle apricot color, like your favourite dress. You were saving for months — a whole autumn — and grandfather grumbled and grumbled about the frivolous waste of money, but once you finally put it on, his scolding didn't matter a bit. The dress made you feel like royalty — elegant, graceful, important.

You wonder if this is how Marquis feels all the time.

Gorgeous outfits, a splendid castle, a life of aristocracy and ease where everything is taken care of by servants and every other weekend there's an opulent dinner party full of refined conversations.

Your envy for him is almost as big as your caution.

Marquis Nicolae is rich. Like many rich people he possesses time. And when one has too much, they become terribly, infinitely bored. That's what grandfather told you in one of his drunken rants: people who are rich, castle-rich, private carriage-rich for generations are bored like nobody else, because nothing is scarce to them and so nothing is precious either. Work for them. Take their money. Keep your head low and remember — they don't see us like we see them.

Grandfather doesn't work in the castle anymore. He's got old hands which shake from years of physical labour and fruit brandy, back-aching hunched posture and swollen feet that need rest. Now he stays at home, waiting for you to return with stories and bread rolls baked by the cook.

He used to serve Marquis Nicolae's father, who was twice as rich, but thrice as wicked, according to grandfather's words.

"I was a stableman, your grandmother was a seamstress, God rest her soul. Sewed all my shirts, this one included," he tugs at the fabric with pride. "She did well on it... Look at those stitches."

For a moment he gets lost in muttering and rubs his index finger on an even patch of stitched fabric, as if hoping his touch can conjure a spectre. "Not like now, where clothes fall apart after just three seasons. Quality... Sturdiness," he smacks the table. "People used to think long term. Made their shirts for decades, strong like this."

Grandfather is forgetful these days, he leaps from one topic to another and loses the main line of thought, especially after a few glasses. But you wait.

"When I worked for Lord Cazimir, you see," he says finally. "He had horses, all strong, sleek, looked like jewels. A new horse each two months, said it wasn't right for a gentleman to have one for too long, but by God, I never saw a man treat them worse than him. Not enough sleep, ridden until bones hurt. If the carriage hit a stone, it was the horse's fault, if the reins got tangled it was the horse's fault, not the bloody driver. He had that whip with metal feathers which could cut through an apple. And before he made the last swish, he'd pause. Look the horse in the eyes. That was the scariest thing, how he stared at them, so calmly."

He glances at you, as if fearing an admonishment. For what? You wonder how it felt, caring for something that looked like a jewel time after time, after time, and knowing the goodbye was certain and inevitable, like a turn of a watermill wheel. Did grandfather mourn the horses? Or did he get used to burying their bodies under the soil? Maybe they fed someone later — people who don't have much are resourceful, they don't bury good meat.

You squeeze the water from the sheet in silence.

"None simply lived past two months, that's why he changed them so often."

"Why didn't you quit?"

"And then do what?" Grandfather snorts. "There was little job outside the castle, everyone who didn't have land or livestock worked for Marquis one way or another."

"It must have been difficult."

"Life is difficult," he answers, and you can't disagree.

Life is difficult, that's a fact, and it didn't get better when you started working for Marquis Nicolae yourself. A good thing is that unlike Lord Cazimir from scare stories he doesn't torment horses and rarely pays attention to anybody in a servant uniform. All of you share the same mindset: a quick "Good morning, m'lord" or "Have a pleasant day, m'lord" and then being gone as fast as possible.

Rumors circulate that Marquis never once had a full smile on his face. Charming chuckles when he's in a good mood, courtly lips stretches for ladies, bemused sneers when he's addressed by those who used to be in favour but now are out — yes, but the genuine and full-hearted joy: nobody has witnessed it.

He doesn't seem unhappy though, nor he is too serious. When you see him Marquis Nicolae always looks like he has eternity at hand and there's no hurry to spend it. To you, he is uninterested in anything and sharp about everything at once.

You can't describe him better. Words fail you when trying to fit him into boxes of easy understanding. But after all, it's not your job to fit him anywhere, your job is dusting shelves and scrubbing floors, and, since recent days — taking care of roses.

It's unusual for the castle to have such plants this early in spring. They're imported, said the gardener, from cooler places and prefer winter over the blooming season of May and June. That's why Marquis commissioned a greenhouse construction weeks prior, to have beautiful flowers which can bloom regardless of the weather. It took an entire month of hard work, people hired from nearby towns and a promise of good money. You watched them build from the kitchen window where you were helping with meals.

Roses arrived next. Seven bushes filled with buds ready to open up any day. And oh they did. Soft apricot colors covered stems like dewdrops, beautiful enough to make one gasp.

One morning you bring your rag and a bucket to the greenhouse a bit earlier to enjoy the fragrance before breakfast is served. Nice things like these are not for maids like you — the petal scent and the gentle touch of leaves — they're for ladies in beautiful dresses who have time and luxury to appreciate them, but nobody will know anyway if you stop to lean down close enough for your nose to almost bury itself in velvety softness. It's a small indulgence which can hardly hurt anyone. Nobody will know if you pretend to be a lady just for a minute.

"They're quite extraordinary, aren't they."

You freeze, nose in the middle of the rose bush.

"I- Yes", you straighten up and curtsy. "They are most beautiful, m'lord."

Marquis' figure, backlit by the morning sun, casts a shadow which stretches far beyond your own feet.

"Do you know why I chose it?" he asks. "This breed."

He's dressed in a dark waistcoat with delicate embroidery on the collar and doesn't have a single hair out of place, not a strand too thick, not a strand too thin; as flawless as a painting which hang on the walls of his library, but not as solemn. Those paintings seem to measure everyone around them. Marquis Nicolae looks more approachable in appearance, and that's where the approachability ends. His eyes, burgundy brown colour you've never seen before, measure people too, in value rather than worthlessness.

You shake your head, "No, m'lord."

"Because," Marquis continues without minding your answer at all, "it's pretty."

His lips stretch in a courtly smile of a gentleman who is amused by his own joke. You don't understand it but smile in return anyway, because you must. Because this is how the world works — nobles are amused and maids fake understanding so the amusement can persist a little longer.

"Go on," he says. "They are meant to be smelled after all."

You nod and curtsy again.

Later he will be served tea at the ornate greenhouse table while you scrub the floors until your fingers ache. Marquis' focus will shift towards letters, and this is how it's supposed to be. Him reading correspondence, you being invisible like dust under the shelves you clean. It feels better when he doesn't look at you with those eyes of his. They pierce through everything they see.

There's something wrong about him. But you can't tell what yet.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Life is monotonous, especially in a place like this, even banquets and events have that homogeneous taste, because there's at least one every three weeks, not speaking of brunches which rotate regularly depending on who's currently in Marquis' favour. You serve dishes full of rich fragrances that make your mouth water but can't ever dream of trying them. Meat dripping with wine sauce, roasted chicken breasts wrapped in crispy bacon and glazed with honey syrup. Fresh fruits coated in powdered sugar. Sometimes in the evening when everyone is asleep you mouth the names of those meals: "Beef Bourguignon," "Veal Piccata", "Chicken Florentine". Those foreign words are hard to pronounce — Beef Boo-gee-nyon, Veel Pick-kata — you do it quietly and mostly in your head so grandfather doesn't hear and scoff about wasting time on useless things.

"You're not starving," he would say. "There's bread, there's soup, you don't need those. Be happy, girl. We used to eat potatoes for months straight during famines."

You've never been hungry enough to know what famine tastes like but suspect that the flavor must be something similar to the dull feeling between the busy hours of work, which gnaws at you and makes your thoughts drift to the lunch break.

Sometimes, in a particularly sour mood he adds, "Don't stuff your head with fancy nonsense you can't have, it's only gonna make you bitter."

True.

You're a maid. A girl. A nobody.

And this is how it's supposed to be.

How to tell grandfather that you don't wish to be fancy? Just to try once the roast duck stuffed with grapes and apples, or fresh sardines baked in butter sauce, which smell heavenly as they're carried up the stairs to Marquis Nicolae's salon where guests are gathered.

How to tell him that it's not about food, not really.

It's about knowing what an apricot rose smells like early in the morning while others sleep. How velvety its petals feel when touched. Delicate things like these you're not supposed to have, but do anyway, because a moment stolen out of monotony pulls you from beneath the apron. You, yourself, not just a pair of hands with tired fingers, exist briefly when roses bloom in Marquis' greenhouse and a little piece of yesterday's cake is smuggled into your pocket.

You understand why he's wary. Grandfather's right: with longing comes bitterness. But you're careful not to overdo it. There's only one stolen minute of appreciation each day, not more, so you remember who you are — someone meant to be seen rarely and unnoticed most of the time — and return behind the apron.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Spring goes on.

Daylight stretches a little longer. Ground gets a little warmer. Marquis Nicolae often spends time in his private study after breakfast, then at noon — in the greenhouse. He strolls there among the greenery or sits by one of the tables with a book. Reading seems to be an activity he favors, and unlike some other gentlemen who grow tired within pages Marquis can stay completely still for hours without once getting restless.

You know because you watch him from the corner of your eye.

What kind of books he likes to read if they manage to keep him entertained for such lengthy periods, what titles do those leather spines hide, which stories are good enough for a gentleman like Marquis? He always seems so politely disinterested. You wonder if there are books that can make even him laugh.

Sometimes he asks you questions which startle you.

"Have you read 'The Castle of the Lady'? It's a novel."

You shake your head. "No m'lord. I can't read."

His eyebrows raise. Not in astonishment, Marquis Nicolae has a face of a man who rarely encounters surprises, his reactions are akin to mild interest bordering on curiosity, as if he enjoys discovering something new, something that doesn't fit into his existing assumptions.

"Can't?" he repeats.

You shift uncomfortably under his gaze, "No, m'lord. Never learnt."

"Who raised you?"

"My grandfather. He's a stableman... was. Now retired".

"I see," he returns to his book.

You fidget with a rag in your hands, why does he care to ask such question? What difference does it make whether you read or don't? It's not that uncommon. Most servants only know the basics, letters which form their names and the ones that stand for numbers. You don't really need the skill. What for?

"You may continue," he adds.

So you do.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

"Are you the only child?"

"Yes, m'lord."

"Your mother? Father?"

"My mother passed away giving birth to me, and father was a soldier, so he died in a war."

"What a shame," Marquis says, but it sounds like a comment on bad weather.

You're standing with fresh linens in his opulent bedchamber. It's spacious: tall windows and furniture made of rare wood. Old, like the walls of Albastru castle itself. A maid's life story is neither interesting nor important enough to pursue it, at least not in the place like this. Marquis Nicolae is bored, that's the most reasonable explanation to the current arrangement. He's looking for entertainment, but what entertainment can come at your expense, you're unsure.

Grandfather warned you not to draw too much attention, but it's not exactly your fault. Marquis' schedule is well known — he spends evenings in the salon and retires long past midnight. The chamber should've been empty. You should've been able to change his bedding, clean the fireplace and leave without as much as a sound.

Yet here he is, in a high armchair by the fireplace.

And here you are, in front of him, waiting for a dismissal that doesn't come.

On a small coffee table there're squares with simple pictures — a dog, a cat, an apple, made of thin wood with letters engraved in black ink. You step from one foot to the other, the lemon-scented sheets hide the way your fingers twitch.

Marquis traces a square with a rose.

"Sit down," he says and motions to the other chair.

"Your linens, m'lord-"

"They can wait."

No, they can't, you think. The bedding needs to be done, the fireplace cleaned, carpets swept, wilted flowers removed — there's so much to do to linger, and it's already getting late. If you're not able to finish on time-

But Marquis Nicolae didn't give you permission to leave.

You sit and put the linens on your lap.

Grandfather would say that Marquis enjoys the sight of your discomfort behind that courtly smile of his, but he doesn't look amused, he looks the usual. Calm and slightly disinterested. Sharp, despite being relaxed.

"If you figure out what letters stand from this," he points at the apple picture square, "to this one," then moves his finger to the picture with a goat, "you'll get a treat."

"M'lord?" you frown.

There must be something wrong with your hearing, but no, Marquis leans back and crosses his long legs. "A treat."

Treats are for children, treats are for dogs, treats are for horses who are obedient and look like jewels. You stare at him, puzzled, but try not to let it show; nobles have strange hobbies sometimes: races which cost thousands of gold coins for one bet alone, hunting dangerous animals, forcing their servants into duels to pass time. This must be one of those, an entertainment beyond your comprehension.

Still, time is moving forward and the complexity of your situation is becoming more apparent with every passing second; you've never felt particularly powerful — why would you? — but now you're acutely aware of how fragile one's position is when it depends on someone else's whims.

You take the first picture.

An apple. Letter A. Then a ball — B. Cat... So that's what they look like written down.

Marquis' eyes follow your fingers as they slide across the wooden squares, you feel his gaze like a touch, even though there's a coffee table distance between you and a bit more. You quietly mouth each word and letter by habit, unaware of this little detail. His eyebrows raise, this time with a hint of amusement which you don't see, too focused on your predicament.

Dog — D.

The clock is ticking.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

"Well?" Marquis asks later when shadows cross the room. The sun is gone, the fire in the fireplace burns lower but bright enough to illuminate the space. Sitting like this has given you a headache which makes thinking harder.

"I have them figured out m'lord", you say carefully.

"Tell me then."

"This is A," you slide the apple towards him across the table. It feels a little silly. "This is B."

The way you say them isn't quite accurate. It's "bee" instead of "b" and "dee" instead of "d", but he doesn't tell you that. Your voice goes quieter with each following letter, perhaps because you're nervous or maybe simply tired — who knows what time it is by now? Ah, quarter to ten. He watches you struggle with spelling and pronunciation until finally there they are. All squares from Apple to Goat, in order just like he arranged them.

"What about this one?" Nicolae points to the playing cat.

"It starts with 'K', m'lord."

You're quite sure, not that much variation is left after all, and say it with the most conviction you can muster so he would finally be satisfied and end this odd game. Your head hurts and stomach grumbles with hunger — there was no time for the lunchbreak today —both physical and mental exhaustion blur together.

Grandfather must be worried sick by now, he hates when you're late without telling anything beforehand.

Then Marquis covers his mouth, and for the first time since you entered Albastru castle, laughs.

Not chuckles. Not smiles without smiling. Laughs that his shoulders shake, that his eyes crinkle at the corners. You stare bewildered, not knowing what to do. Laugh yourself? Smile politely? Say "m'lord" again?

Marquis' laughter dies down eventually and he collects himself, straightening his waistcoat which doesn't require any adjusting in the first place, he's perfect as always.

"No, that's C."

Your cheeks flush red, how were you supposed to know? It would seem that a gentleman such as Marquis Nicolae should know better than mocking someone's lack of education, but apparently he finds it amusing. You lower your gaze and look away.

"How are you called?" he asks.

After a pause your name rolls off your tongue; small in his bedchamber, it barely leaves an echo.

"Well, I said a treat, didn't I?"

You don't want any treats, or to spend here even a minute longer; Marquis rises and walks towards his desk.

"Come here."

Reluctantly you stand up and follow him. The linens are left on the chair in a crumpled pile, they need ironing now. There's nothing to do other than obeying so you stop next to him where he opens one of the drawers. Inside you can see something wrapped in white paper with a thin ribbon bow around it. He takes the item out and pulls the ribbon off. Delicate scent fills the air, the little cakes, you know their name from the cook ─ macarons ─ bloom inside the wrapping.

Marquis Nicolae picks one up with two fingers and brings it to your lips.

The macarons smell sweet like almonds and look beautiful like roses in his greenhouse. They're not for maids, you think, no, this is...he shouldn't be doing that.

Your mouth waters anyway.

His eyes don't leave your face, "Do you want it or not?"

You do.

"Then take a bite."

The dessert melts in your mouth instantly. Its texture is soft, like petals, like everything else luxurious you've never had but imagined countless times. A little chewy, a bit crunchy, it's the most delicious thing you've tried, better than a piece of cake taken from the kitchen pantry, better than honeyed walnut bread.

"Another one?"

Marquis Nicolae feeds you two more, before you realize what exactly is happening — a bite by a small bite your dignity dissolves into his hand. You swallow the last morsel and quickly step back; you've forgotten yourself, forgot who you were and where, and now there's sweetness lingering on your tongue, while Marquise' fingertips smell faintly of apricot.

What have you done?

He looks amused again.

"Thank you, m'lord," you curtsy, then turn around to gather the discarded sheets.

"Clean the fireplace and change the linens. Then you might be free."

"Yes, m'lord."

It's a dismissal at last.

Marquis sits down and reaches for a book — he's done with you it seems — so you hurry to complete the assigned tasks. The fireplace isn't too dirty fortunately, just some ashes and coal leftovers. Next, the sheets, then the flowers.

Before you close the door and rush down the empty hall he speaks again, "If you still remember them all by tomorrow evening, you'll have another treat."

#shalott fanfiction #yandere #original character #original work #yandere x reader #yandere oc #yandere oc x reader

89 notes · View notes

mayullla · 1 year

Text

Quest: Find a lost boy who ran away from home to the forest.

Character(s): Orc (Oc / Original work) Summary: You headed to the forest in search of the boy and happened to find an orc camp and somewhere on the side saw the boy in the hands of a tall orc. Tags/warnings: Yandere!monster (male monster), fem!reader, kidnapped/trapped, violence (both to the reader and outside), constant fear of being eaten, running away, being treated like a pet Note: Just to make sure while I was writing this I wasn't thinking the dnd style kind of thing but more so the generic common monsters that you find in games that you must kill RPG. (.... just that the orc is very tall and buff...)

{ - JRPG Quest masterlist - }

Find a boy who ran away from home. The boy had gotten into a fight with his father because he didn't want to help out with work preferring to go out and spend time with his friends. The boy had run away in the morning but didn't come back home even after the sun started to set. His parents were worried and looked everywhere in the village but no sight of the boy.

They found out that someone had seen the boy running to the forest alone. They were in terrified when they heard it and the father wanted to walk straight into the woods and search for his son but was stopped by his friends who tried to calm him down. The man was nothing more than a farmer and it would be dangerous for him to go into the forest like this when there was many monsters lurking within the woods. It was preferable that someone who had the skills to handle it.

That is probably where you come in when you took the quest. Their pay wasn't really luxurious which was understandable for a farmer's family you thought that there could be a chance that their friends also chipped in a bit of money to help out in paying the fee.

But what you found in the search was something different and more severe for it could cost the lives of the whole village.

Ho... you looked at the camp made out of goblins and orcs. This was too dangerous for you to handle alone you thought to yourself as you looked at the armed orcs and the laughing goblins carrying rusty swords.

Goblins in this world are not necessarily the smartest, or most powerful strength or stealth wise as a matter of fact they are known to be weak alone and even beginner hunters can mostly take care of them if given the right training. And while many tend to stick in groups of 30 or less you never really saw this many of them at once.

There were more than 80 goblins from what you can see. Wild monsters that laugh so painfully to your ears as you were sure that there were more. Yet you could not help but gulp when you saw the many orcs around the tribe while not as many as the goblins they were half the many as goblins. Tall green-skinned monsters were taller than the people that you know. Long canine teeth show as they guard the borders of the camp with strong builds, tattoos, and necklaces of skulls both humans and other creatures you knew that these orcs were not for show.

You were supposed to run away and tell the guards of a nearby village that about the camp when you heard a small child screaming voice.

Running to the sound, you found a boy held by his collar by an orc. The boy tried to kick the orc yet it was useless when you compare their builds, the orc was too strong. That child was about to be taken by the orc when you screamed at them with your dagger out ready to hurt. "Realise the kid, unless you want to die." You warned the orc who stared at you. He didn't seem intimated at you, almost as if looking down at you with his bored stare.

He was taller than you, taller than humans. To him, you were nothing but a plant of wood at best or very thin twigs of bones.

Glancing at the child then at you as he moves the child back facing you, closer to you. You wondered if the monster was going to mock you for even trying, when you see his muscles you knew it might as well take three to four knights moving all together to even have a chance to take it down compared to an adventurer like you.

"Trade."

.... What...?

The gruff voice told you, not expecting them to say something like you have to do a double take wondering if you heard that wrong. Yet it seems that you weren't mistaken as he huffed in your silence.

"Trade boy. You stay."

"What..." You could not believe what the orc was talking telling you to trade your life if you wanted the boy to live. You considered it but fear swelled in your heart till you heard the boy's whimper and looked at him. Tears in the boy's eyes, he was terrified.

"You stay... boy let go. You mine." The orc repeated again, looking at you waiting he still held the boy on the neck.

The boy's life was within your hands. The boy whimpered again as the orc's grip tightened on the boy's clothes. He wasn't patient. "Trade!" You screamed at the orc your eyes on the boy.

The orc looked satisfied as he dropped the boy to the ground and as you tried to take the boy away cautious of the orc instead of attacking from a change of mind or taking the boy away saying that was all just him mocking you he instead grabbed you.

"HEY! LET GO OF ME!!" The orc tossed you on his shoulder as if you were nothing but a potato sack. You tried to scream as you beat his back with yours but he didn't seem bothered by your feeble attempts.

You yelled at the boy to get away from here and that you can handle yourself, the boy tried to help yet the moment he tried to grab a strong the orc growled at the flinching boy.

When you could not see the boy, far away that you were sure that he had time to run away if something goes terribly wrong you started to protest demanding that you would let down this instant as your leg and fist hit his muscles you knew he wasn't pained by any of your feeble attacks and what weapon you had was quickly tossed away by him the moment he threw you on his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

You were getting close to the camp...

You gulped as the goblins and orcs all stare at you in the arms of the orc, some goblins staring hungrily at you as if you were a meat buffet and maybe that was what they thought of you when one tried to reach out for your arm.

Only to freeze when the orc glared at the goblin growling as if warning the smaller weaker monsters to watch it. The goblin quickly backed away from you fearful of their own monster ally. You wondered if you were safe for a moment. Just a moment you thought that you would not be eaten at least not by them. You wondered if the orc wanted to eat you all to himself.

Into a camp hut, you were tossed into the stiff bed as you wondered if you would die right at this moment. Ripe limb from limb, you wanted to defend yourself but without a weapon and the orc being too tall, you didn't think you could even win much less escape as you will be mobbed by the monsters outside either way.

You didn't know what to do when he didn't do anything to you leaving you to do whatever you please in the tent, yet he did set boundaries when you tried to step out for a moment to look out or when you went too near to his weapons. He was watching you as sharpened his weapon, growling at you when you did something that you were supposed not to do.

While he let you go about the tent under his watch you could not help but flinch when he planned to head out for a moment, suddenly standing from whatever he was doing, grabbing you, and tossing you again to the bed with your leg tied with a rope to something heavy. After a while, he would come back with berries and fruits for you along with unknown meat (what tasted like a rabbit) and a water bucket.

At night he would join you in the makeshift bed holding you in his arms, you looked away from the monster that held you your heart beating fast as it was too close wondering when it would just bite your head off yet instead of that with his tight hold over you slowly he fell asleep, his breathing can be felt by your hair as you fearfully stayed still.

You thought of running, late at night unable to sleep you thought that this could be your chance to run away when all the other monsters were also asleep but the orc's arm was heavy, hugging your waist you could not help but move a little more than intended. As you tried to get up you checked to see if the orc was still sleeping only for you to stop breathing when you see him staring down at you, warning.

He was awake.

You can't help but wince as you tried to pull away in fear when the rope tied to your ankle stopped you from going any farther. You totally forgot about it... you looked down in instinct as if trying to show that you were small and that you were guilty and sorry. The orc huffed as he pulled you closer to his chest. Your head bumped into his long tusk.

Because of how you have been trying to move you were facing his chest now and pulled closer to him your nose bumped into his chest. You closed your eyes trying to act as if you were asleep sure that he was still watching you, daring to make any sudden movements.

He wasn't much of a talker and without your weapon, you weren't much of a fighter, you were a tiny human that a buffed orc kept like a pet in his own home. All he did was command you with one word, not fluent in human language but knowing just enough to force you to do something. For a moment you thought that the orc was actually nice when you noticed how careful he was around you as if you were fragile like glass.

What a horrible thought.

"Eat." A grape in from of your face but you looked away. It wasn't like you didn't want to but right now you just lost hope as he took you farther and farther away from your home. Tossed like a potato sack as the monster went farther and farther away from the nearest village. Yet when they found a village smaller than the one you save the boy was from, you could not help but feel bile come to your mouth as you heard the screams and fires a little away from you. You could not help them not when you were placed in a cage with other pitiful humans and guarded by more orcs.

As you pushed yourself away from the orc who finally collected you when the fire died down a little and more human slaves both young and old. How his clothes were tattered and burnt from the fire and blood stain his weapon and his hands as he grabbed you again and pulled you out of the cage to take you back. For a moment you thought that there was a reason why that skull necklace was on his neck and that it was something that was decoration.

You bite your lip as tears leaked from your eyes when he warningly growled if you were not eating something bad would happen slowly you took the grape to your mouth slowly munching in fear. He huffed again as he took another grape that you were sure was from the village that they raided killing anybody who tried to fight back.

You had to get away. Otherwise, you will really die.

It was a few days after the whole situation as you looked for a chance to run away when the whole place. When the orcs and goblins were moving again that day took a short break near a lake, the orc had left you under a tree to get some water. Maybe he trusted you a little that you would not run away anymore, at least he thought you didn't have the guts to actually run away.

But you did. When nobody was looking, already so used to your presence as the orc's pet you slowly sneaked away and when you were far enough made a mad dash.

You ran and ran even as you felt pain in your ribs you push through the suffering caring about living than a short pain. As you pant tired you still kept running through the forest but you tried your best in fear that this might be your first and last chance you could ever get away from the monsters. You were so desperate even as your legs wobbled you kept on running and didn't see a root of a tree sticking out that your foot caught on and tripped.

"Ow..." You mumbled as you tried to get up but could not help but hiss when you felt the pain in your ankle. You sprained it yet you could not dwell on those thoughts when you heard a loud roar, you knew that he found out that you left.

You need to hide, you need to hide. Looking around you crawled into a hollow log hoping that the orc would not find you. In a few seconds, you hear the sounds of stomps and you knew it was him pulling your legs closed to yourself you prayed that the orc would not look into the log and just give up.

However that hope was only shattered when you saw his face from the hole you crawled in, he was furious you could see in his eyes as he growled that he found you. Before you could crawl deeper into the hollow log away from the monster he grabbed your sprained ankle.

"Mate. Mine." You yelped when he dragged your feet pulling you out of the log with one hand, with how tight he was holding your ankle it hurt so much as he pulled you out upside down. Above the ground, you fearfully looked at the monster as blood rushed to your head. The monster was angry you could see it as he glared at you.

As he looked at your leg, you feared what was going through his head as his hand tightened around your ankle even more as if trying to break it. You screamed in pain as tears flew from your eyes to your forehead and hair. "I AM SORRY!! I AM SORRY!!" You cried out in fear that he would crush your bones to pieces making you unable to walk anymore.

Maybe he understood that you were scared and that you were actually sorry as the strength lessen. Tears still flowed from your eyes as he moved you to his arms now upright as he let go of your leg. You knew that you will not be able to walk for while not when you already sprained your ankle while running away and not when the lingering pain worsened because of the orc hand who was so close to breaking it as punishment for running away.

You are his mate or at least that was what he called you and now you could only doubt that you will ever be able to run away from his grasp. Not when he warned all the other monsters to watch you if you ever escape to catch you, not when he threatened you to dare leave and that he would break your legs if you do. Not when he placed a dog leash on your neck as he held the rope making sure that you will never leave him again.

Note: Okay gotta be honest orcs/goblins are deff not my thing but I had to add either them or goblins one way or another cause it is like one of the most common monsters in RPG games apart from slimes. And since it is like probably impossible for me to think of any goblin scenarios (I tried ;-;) I went for orcs. My mind the whole time was most deff thinking of a buff man than an orc so it may or may not have leaked in my writing. BUT ANYWAY HOPE YOU LIKE IT~!

563 notes · View notes

ouroborosorder · 4 months

Note

query: what is undead unluck

Undead Unluck is my favorite manga of all time. It's an absolutely absurd, creative, passionate, and earnest manga that feels like the perfect execution of the story you always wanted to write for your middle school OCs.

The protagonist, Fuuko, has the power Unluck, which makes it so that anyone she touches experiences a stroke of bad luck, the severity scaling with how much she loves the target. The first time it appeared was when she went to hug her parents at an airport as they boarded their flight. The airplane exploded on the tarmac, killing everyone onboard instantly.

She's not the only one this happened to, either. The story is about the Union, an organization of Negators - people given powers by God at times specifically chosen to ruin their lives with ironic tragedy. So out of revenge, the Union are trying to kill god, who is treating humanity like its playthings, ruining their lives because it's fun.

UU is an absolutely batshit insane manga with pacing that runs backwards at the speed of a bullet train going downhill, absurdly brilliant power systems, well-written characters, and genuinely phenomenal art. It's also one of the very very rare female-led shounen manga, and Fuuko's arc is legitamately great, she's easily the best character in the entire story. I love her so much.

The only asterisk I can give to UU is that the first 9 chapters have a lot, a lot of weird uncomfortable gropey humor and bad fanservice. This stops literally instantly at chapter 9, which is also when the story goes through a series of retcons that reads more like "alright motherfuckers let's get this shit back on track" than anything else. it's got a ROUGH start, but please stick with it, it's a genuinely delightful blast that made me weep like a baby and reconsider a few things about how I approach life and the people I love.

Also read the manga. The anime is out there and it's real and it's fine but I genuinely do not think it holds a fucking candle to the manga. The tone is completely jacked, they tried to make it like, a dramatic prestige thriller when it's more akin to rapidly oscillating between Jojo's and original Dragon Ball. And god, no anime production budget can keep up the level of pacing needed to make UU work, and you can fucking tell they're straining hard to make this show functional.

#undead unluck

72 notes · View notes

luxaofhesperides · 4 months

Text

Listen. I love the dcxdp crossover. It’s a lot of fun! There’s so much that can be done for this crossover, with all the characters and settings and the many plots that can spring up from them. But as much as I love writing for it and sharing my fics with the community, there’s been a significant uptick in things that are rubbing me the wrong way. Some of these things have to do with canon vs fanon, but others are more about the shifting culture of the community.

(keep in mind that I only see things on Tumblr and am not in any discords, so my experience will be different from others bc I have a more limited experience with the wider community)

(putting it all under a read more bc its long)

Let’s start off with a look at what we’re doing as a group:

Building off of completed fics on tumblr: I always thought the etiquette is to not build off of a completed work without permission. Someone had an idea and executed it, then shared it with us. It should end there. If you want to add to it, contact the author first and see if it’s something they’re fine with; some will say no, some will say yes, some will say yes but be sure to credit them for the original fic. A lot of what I’m seeing is a completed fic gets added on to in a way that completely takes it away from the original idea. Having experienced this myself (on a requested prompt from someone else, no less), I found it kind of rude. Maybe it’s just me, but a completed fic is not a prompt request or something open for building up another story around. It’s already completed. Leave the story as is and let the author know you liked it.

Expecting others to write for you: the prompts are what build this crossover fandom, in my eyes. Prompts are posted and people create something around them, either as a group by adding onto what other people are saying, or as individual fics that one person wrote. Now I’m seeing people throw out prompts that are basically fic outlines, then begging others to write something for it. Like, those prompts are already written! They have very specific details! Why not write it yourself? You’re already halfway there, you can just write the thing you want to see and post it. It’s not about being ‘good’ or ‘bad’ at writing, it’s about crafting an idea to share to the world. Why ask others to write it for you when you’ve already practically done it?

But also, you are not owed fic. This might just be general fandom burn out talking, but being a fic author who has been treated like a machine? It sucks. I love writing, but I share what I write because what I wrote made me happy and I wanted to share that with others. I’m not a content creating machine who has to pump out fic after fic for other people’s entertainment. I just want to share what I love and having people pop up in my notifs only going “write more/tag me/sequel?/etc” is tiring. I get that it’s coming from a place of love bc you liked the fic enough to want to see more, but please actually talk about what I’ve already written instead of going “update? More? MORE????”

Hostility to DC canon: I get that DC canon is a mess, but it still is a canon and has a lot of cool stuff! I’m seeing a lot of posts recently about how dpxdc people refuse to engage with the comics, and I need to let yall know that this is not a new thing. DC fans also refuse to engage with the comics (it’s mostly batfam) and it’s very easy to tell who has and who hasnt ready batfam related stuff bc the fanon is incredibly wrong about characterisation and what happened in comics. But that’s for a different post.

I’m seeing both sides of the argument (this is for fun, reading comics isn’t required, don’t like don’t read vs it’s tiring seeing people butcher my favorite characters into ocs with their name/face, I want to share my love for comics but there’s so much pushback, it shouldn’t be weird to expect people engaging with a media to have actually engaged with that media). And I think you should engage with comics! DP is a unique case in which fanon is for the most part better and more interesting than the original show (also death to the author/butch hartman), but DC comics shouldn’t be engaged with in that way. If you like the characters you see in dpxdc, you should read about them in comics! The whole point of a fandom is that you’re a fan of the original media. That’s why you’re engaging with it in this way, writing within the world and characters and canon.

I don’t know how people write for fandoms when they’re not familiar with the source material. I wanted to write dcxdp so I started rewatching DP. I’m reading comics. I want to know the characters and their stories so I can have a foundation to write from, and also to better understand the media so I can share my love for it. The refusal to engage with source material while engaging with its fandom is so strange to me.

Also dc fans who love the comics are great! In my experience, they’re very kind and willing to help you jump into comics! Don’t know where to start? Pick a character or team and follow them! Want a reading guide? We’ve got TONS. want thoughts on a specific character or comic run? Just ask!

Now to more specific points about what I’m seeing in dcxdp works:

Mischaracterized batfam: this is a group of people who are disasters and have complicated relationships with each other. They’re kind, wonderful people who bring out the best and worst in each other. Why is Batman always adopting people. Why is this a running joke with the batfam. I get it being a joke the first few times, but I’ve seen it so often and done like it’s accurate characterization that I just. I can’t. I leave that fic immediately. I can’t do it anymore. Batman is paranoid and tried very hard to keep kids away from him/away from being a vigilante. Unfortunately all the kids he got are stubborn and smart so he was doomed from the beginning.

Superman and Kon: you guys are pretty much only pulling from Young Justice Animated which I think is a terrible adaptation, but that’s my own taste. But seriously. Clark is kind. That’s an important part of his character! He’s the strongest man in the world and he’s kind. He was also dead when Kon first appeared as a experiment from CADMUS in Hawaii. They’re not father-son, but they are family and they do care for each other, once they get to know each other. Also Kon is not an angry broody boy, he’s funny! And annoying! pls read kon comics guys, i promise youll like his actual character

Chronos??? Guys. Chronos is not a god in DC canon. He is in Greek mythology, but in DC he’s a Captain Atom villain and he’s literally just a guy who got obsessed with having perfect timing. He’s themed around clocks. He has nothing to do with time travel or time gods. The Speedforce is Time, basically, and it is not human. It is an eldritch being beyond our comprehension that can eat people. If it chooses to have a human form, it’s going to choose to look like Bart. Please read Flash stuff, it’s interesting!

Lazarus Pit Madness lasts like 5 minutes in canon. Jason having it, and being affected by it for years, is a purely fanon thing from the dc side. Not going to say anything more on this because it goes into Jason Todd discourse.

Repetition: I’m sorry but I’m tired of seeing the same things over and over. I barely see anything out of the dcxdp tags thats new and fun to engage with. Everything is the same variation of “Danny helps Pit Mad Jason”, “Bruce insta-adopts Danny”, “Superman is mean to clones”, etc etc. Think of any popular dcxdp trope and that’s all you’ll see. I get why these are fun and popular, but the way it’s being engaged with now? It literally makes me exit Tumblr and put my phone down.

Not every prompt has to go down the same routes as the other prompts. Please explore more options, branch out, twist those tropes around to do something new with them. And also stop going onto other people’s fics and saying “what about [dcxdp trope]? Cant wait to see [dcxdp trope]! You should have [dcxdp] trope.” If I didn’t include it, it’s not included for a reason. There are hundreds of other fics that write specifically about those exact tropes. Read those, or write your own. (im being super bitter here but please just let me write what i want to write without trying to pull the story into another direction for a trope you like. Im writing for me, but sharing it for you. Not every fic needs those tropes in them.)

Tumblr specific things: this is less about the content and more about general posting etiquette. Please put long posts under a read more. If it’s more then three paragraphs, consider adding a read more if there is significantly MORE than three paragraphs. Tag appropriately. Content warnings and trigger warnings should be at the very top of the post and in the tags so they can be properly blocked. If you’re posting fic/prompt, please double check your spelling and fix any typos you find because posts that are filled with excessive typos are difficult to read.

There’s probably a lot more to talk about, but just getting this much out is tiring and, frankly, I don’t want to think on it any more today. If you reply/add comments, I won’t get to them in a while bc I will be writing ghostlights and yhk fic to lift my mood :)

#rambles #dpxdc #dc x dp #tentatively tagged for cataloging and blocking purposes #i will probably make more coherent posts later abt the individual things in here so if u want a discussion wait for those #just so its easy to keep track of what we're talking abt

67 notes · View notes

boundinparchment · 6 months

Text

Genshin Fic Reccomendations

Here are some of my personal fic reccs. All links go to AO3. Some of these are from writers I've had the great honor to get to know. Others are ones I've stumbled across over the course of the last few years. All have a special place in my heart and I wanted to take the time in the final week of the year to lift up other writers!

This list is alphabetical by character (and skews heavily towards Dottore). Dividers are from saradika-graphics.

If you're on this list and want your tumblr tagged as well, let me know!

Alhaitham

The Brazen and the Cold - Rosengrata

Teen. Alhaitham/OC. Rosen always puts so much attention into the dynamic between the characters and making them feel immersed in the world, like they belong there. The bickering and the banter between Aisha and Althaitham is incredibly entertaining.

Magpie - Insult2Injury

Explicit. Alhaitham/Female Reader. In which you catch Alhaitham in a compromising position and offer some…assistance. Mind the tags.

Childe & Scaramouche

Love is a Dog From Hell - Maokitty

Mature. Childe/Female Reader, Scaramouche/Female Reader, mind the tags. Absolutely heart-breaking as only Mao knows how to cultivate. Immersive and grounded in the way reader is woven into the world of the Harbingers (and all the more painful for it). This fic is one of the only exceptions for either of these characters; thanks for hurting me in this way.

Diluc

Lady Lazarus - Unlockthelore

Diluc / OC, OC / OC. One of the first Genshin fics I ever read as a whole (pretty sure). The prose is so rich and descriptive, captivating right from the start. Go check out the author’s other fics + original works

Il Dottore

Take My Everything (It Was Always Yours) - Nightfrost

Mature. Il Dottore & The Tsaritsa. Like all stories on this list, it deserves far more attention than it gets. This was one of the first Dottore fics I read, back when little was available other than the manga and a few brave people were creating content based on that alone. The writing itself is beautiful, poetic in the way it portrays his rise to power and his dedication to the Tsaritsa despite his hatred for the gods. The warnings should be heeded (torture, descriptions of torture, monsterification, not a happy ending).

Moon Waltz - Yoshinori

General Audiences. Gender neutral reader/Dottore. An enjoyable mix of canon and headcanon, especially with the Segment lore thrown into the mix.

I’ll Break You - 12thFatui

Teen. Il Dottore/Female Reader. Beloved enemies to lovers with lots of world building. An indulgent favorite read.

Lungs Into Gills - Lestaire

Explicit. Il Dottore/Female Reader. The definitive Sharktorre fic. Need I go on? (I’m absolutely enabling you again if you ever do more with this).

Solar Flare - Lestaire

Explicit. Il Dottore/Female Reader. A Fontainian scientist finds herself in Snezhnaya as Dottore’s new assistant. Shenanigans and pining ensure. It’s been a treat to see this story develop! <3 I’m looking forward to the rest of it (and all of you should too!)

the capillaries in my eyes are bursting - LocalPlagueNurse

Mature. Il Dottore/Female Reader. Heavy family dysfunction and angst, in which Dottore’s wife grows tired of his nonsense and the man is too dense to realize until it’s too late.

Chemistry - Jessamine_Rose02

Not Rated. Il Dottore/Female Reader. Yandere, dark themes, unhealthy relationship. Whenever I’m in need of a dark yandere fic for Dottore, this one comes to mind.

He Hates You - Sweatandwoe

Explicit. Il Dottore/Reader. He just can’t stop thinking about you and has little self-control (and we love him for it)

Arrangement - Sherwood

Explicit. Il Dottore/Reader. Modern AU in which Dottore is a sugar daddy and both of you toe the boundaries. Mind the tags.

Motion Sickness - Chickenparm

General Audiences. Il Dottore/Reader. Zandik explores ancient technology. It doesn’t go as planned.

Eventide - Chickenparm

Explicit. Il Dottore/Female Reader. Unrequited love, mild yandere themes, smut; mind the tags. Another fic in which the writing is just as captivating as the character interactions themselves. The dynamic is perfect and I love the reader character in this, who could easily be their own person.

A Seed of Doubt - Krokus

Explicit. Il Dottore/Lumine. Hurt/comfort, smut. BDSM and sub/dom relationship, in which Dottore is (of course) perceptive. Mind the tags.

Responsiveness - Krokus

Explicit. Il Dottore/Lumine. Smut, BDSM, sub/dom relationship, implied drugging. A little experiment to see how Lumine reacts to his touch (and more). Mind the tags.

Crackling of Fire and Lightning - harmonic_melody

General Audiences. Il Dottore/La Signora. Signora survives her duel with the Raiden Shogun but returns with a newfound fear of lightning. Emotional hurt/comfort, and as usual Dottore sucks at feelings.

More Than Routine - morikouyou

Explicit. Il Dottore/Female Reader. Mind the tags; violence and noncon, generally a dark fic. Reader remembers Dottore from when he was Zandik, and finds herself a subject of his experiments.

Quid Pro Quo - Petrichorium

Explicit. Il Dottore/Female Reader. A deal with Dottore to help find a cure seals Reader’s fate. Jealous and repressed as only he can be, mixed with a Reader character who knows exactly how to get what she wants. Lives rent free in my head a lot.

Pale Flames Withering - Cassander

Explicit. Il Dottore/Pierro, Il Dottore’s Segments/Pierro. A beautiful relationship study in which both are bad with feelings, juggling immortality, and misinterpreting one another.

Kaveh

Even Exchange - Chickenparm

Explicit. Kaveh/Neutral Reader. Cute dynamic and a reader character that’s easy to believe exists within the universe; organic in their banter and interactions with Kaveh.

Scaramouche

Inauguration - Chickenparm

Explicit. Scaramouche/Female reader. Companion fic to Eventide. The only other exception for me regarding Scaramouche. Love the characterization! Scaramouche, so close to godhood, and yet so lonely, insecure; Reader, strong-willed and unbelieving. Themes are on-point, such a good balance to Dottore’s character in the other fic.

Xiao

Preta - Maokitty

Teen. Xiao/Gender neutral reader (if that’s wrong, correct me Mao; going by AO3 tags). Xianxia, with a lot of in-depth clarification and notes for those not familiar with the genre. I’ve been meaning to go back to this one, both for the prose and because I have a soft spot for the yaksha and adepti of Liyue.

Zhongli

Against All Odds Series - Rosengrata

Teen. Zhongli/Original Female Character. Hauteclaire struggles with her place as a Khaenri’ahn in a post-cataclysmic world; Zhongli is one of the few who understands the burden of a long life.

Stay Gold - Enegmatic

Mature. Zhongli/Female Reader. Reader comes from Fontaine and, upon looking for a new start, bumps right into Zhongli. Such good world-building and organic interactions, tension absolutely on point!

#juni fic reccs #genshin fic reccs #if i couldn't update by the end of the year I at least wanted to lift others up

86 notes · View notes

ilikekidsshows · 8 months

Text

@aaghht honestly, after seeing more of the show and now the Paris special, my opinion abt Chloe's writing writing has turned from "the writers hate her specifically bc they're out of ideas" into "did Astruc make her based off some1 he hated irl?" cuz it's very ridiculous how s1-3 gave us a different picture of her than we got later. Thomas saw how the fans thought she should grow into redemption as a char,and very strongly disagreed.

Astruc's inability to take criticism is a part of a bigger issue he has as a creator where he is unable to deal with fans interpreting his work differently from what he intended. If his seasons 4-5 treatment of Chloé is backlash at people who saw her as redeemable, it does raise the question why he's so vested in the interpretation that Chloé specifically is irredeemable when the likes of Gabriel and Félix (people whose evil schemes have actually succeeded) got to go scot free. Does he just hate mean teenage girls that much?

I’ve seen this "Chloé is a stand-in for someone Astruc used to know" theory around, and it would explain why he gets so emotional about Chloé online and why he insists a character he created is irredeemable instead of just saying he wrote her to be irredeemable, acting like she has some kind of agency when he's the one who made her and has the power to put her on any character development path he chooses.

My only criticism of this idea is this: I don’t think Astruc is that subtle. I don’t think he’d have the self-control to hold himself back for three seasons and a special when it comes to having a fictional manifestation of his hatred he could do anything with, even though he's made some comments about there being more corporate control over the story during seasons 1-3. Like, the instant they decided to make Adrien a Sentimonster Gabriel started twirling his ring like it was a merry-go-round and he was working at an amusement park. This is why I also don’t believe SentiAdrien was a thing before season 4, and why I call season 4 a retooling. Astruc seems to have very little subtlety as a creator, we can see what he thinks in what he writes, and season 4 marks a clear difference in how he writes Adrien and Chloé specifically.

Astruc is incredibly invested in Marinette's character. She's his baby OC, she was the first idea he created for the Miraculous concept and he worked on the idea for years before a company decided to catch his pitch. Chloé was created as a nemesis to Marinette, a character he calls his imaginary daughter. Does Astruc want the audience to hate Chloé because she's mean to his "daughter" or because she's some spectre of a past school bully he never got over? Considering only school bullying is treated with proper gravitas on the show, while terrorism, domestic abuse and slavery are just everyday stuff everybody is cool with, it could very well be the latter. But if that's the case, seasons' 1-3 production must have really stifled what he wanted to do with her character originally.

#miraculous ladybug #ml critical #ml writing critical #ml writers salt

95 notes · View notes

midstofroses · 5 months

Text

Love Me Like That

❝𝑷𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒂 𝒑𝒊𝒄𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒆— 𝑶𝒖𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑰 𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒊𝒏 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆.❞

♡

Pairing: Jeong Yuno-Jaehyun (nct) x (fem!oc) Original Character

» Genre: one-shot, soft-angst, underlying suggestive– reader discretion advised ▪︎ ex to lovers » Disclaimer! This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead, events or even other fictional stories is purely coincidental

Sienna stepped into the room, the aroma of pizza lingering in the air. "You're just in time. Did you bring the pizza?" Her friend– Nabi asked, revealing the items she had bought. "Yeah, and got some chicken too," she smiled excitedly.

Their living room was transformed into a haven for a movie marathon, a night to savour their well-deserved chill and create fond memories. Nabi's eyes sparkled with excitement as she accepted the food. "Well, then you should go clean yourself and come back here so we can start our movie night."

"I'll be quick," Sienna chimed.

After a brisk wash, the refreshing feeling enveloped her. A slight relief washed over her, even though her raging hormones from that time of the month still caused her physical discomfort.

While picking up her pyjamas, she noticed a mountain of clean clothes at the edge of her bed. Sighing, she decided to restore order before rejoining her friends. Sienna's frustration grew when the drawer refused to close. It wasn't as if she had bought new clothes for her drawer to betray her.

After several failed attempts, she couldn't contain her anger and punched the drawer in frustration.

"I missed him," she mumbled, catching her breath. The reason for her inconvenience dawned on her – her clothes weren't folded the way they used to be when he was around. How foolish of her.

Leaving her dark room, Sienna went to the kitchen where Kai noticed her friend's slightly bruised hand. "Oh? What happened to your hand?" she asked in confusion.

"Oh, it's nothing. I just need to run water on it," Sienna replied, brushing off the concern.

"Make sure you put ointment and bandage it after cooling it off," Kai advised.

"Yeah, will do," Sienna responded, putting on a brave smile beneath her troubled emotions.

"Oh, by the way, Jaehyun came by this afternoon looking for you," Nabi announced, interrupting the moment. Kai recalled the earlier encounter, suspecting a disagreement.

"Did you guys fight?" Kai asked, and Sienna's expression grew timid. She didn't want to discuss him; it was giving her a headache.

"He brought red velvet cupcakes," Nabi added, trying to lighten the mood. Sienna glanced at the coffee table, spotting the cupcakes – a favourite treat of theirs.

"You mentioned it's your first day of 'red days.' I guess having Jaehyun be part of your monthly flow app is so useful," Nabi giggled, proud of the gesture despite the situation.

"Heh, I guess so," Sienna chirped, trying to keep the conversation light while tending to her hand. "Why does he always have great timing?" she pondered, glancing at her phone with unread messages from Yuno piling up.

As they settled into their movie night, Kai brought up the topic of sharing expenses in a relationship. The conversation flowed, intertwining with the movie's background noise.

"I totally agree with you gals, but if the guy made you feel uncomfortable throughout the date, I'd rather pay my half and be done with it," Sienna commented, sharing her perspective.

Kai expanded on the aftermath, "So he wouldn't have the chance to point stupid things. Such as he paid the whole time, but he would act like a sad boy or an ass since the date didn't end well, right?"

"Exactly! Ugh, that's the feeling I hate," Sienna raged, hugging a pillow. After her emotional outburst, she finally indulged in the red velvet cupcake she had been craving.

As the night deepened, the snow outside intensified, creating a cosy atmosphere in their little bubble of friendship. "But if you think about it like this, he wasted your valuable time." Kai offered a new perspective. “So you at least did not waste your own money”

"But that's not what she came for in the first place," Nabi pointed out, settling the situation. “Besides we all know we can earn more money than to live like that.”

"I'd still rather drown myself than give him the privilege to think he spoiled me with his own money," Sienna expressed her feelings, hormones adding a touch of intensity.

The three friends continued their night, sharing deep conversations and appreciating each other's presence. Unbeknownst to them, Sienna was truly grateful, even amid the challenges she hid behind her facade.

As the last days of spring dwindled, Yuno felt a magnetic pull towards the enchanting nights, eager to grasp the remnants of the season before the relentless heat of summer took over. The crisp wind, a balm for his cluttered mind, whispered promises of clarity.

"This feels nice," he murmured, eyes fixed on the captivating night unfolding in the park by the river. Soft lights adorned the streets, and cherry blossoms, in their final dance, swirled around, accompanied by the gentle melody emanating from his headphones.

On a whim, Yuno invited Johnny for a spontaneous bike ride, half-expecting a decline. Much to his surprise, his best friend agreed, and they found themselves in a nearby park, a place etched with memories of their shared adventures.

Yuno, seeking an escape from the confines of home and work, embraced the freedom of riding through the city. The wind carried untold stories, and the cityscape unfolded its secrets.

"Hey, there's no one in the court," Johnny observed, diverting Jaehyun's attention. "Wanna play?" Jaehyun suggested.

"Yeah, it's been a while. It's going to be fun," Johnny agreed, infusing the atmosphere with infectious enthusiasm. After a few spirited rounds, they decided to take a breather, relishing the camaraderie that defined their friendship.

Perched on a bench around the court, they savoured water and ice cream. Johnny playfully teased, "Jae, not to sound like a jealous second babe, but don't you usually ask Sienna for these?" Laughter bubbled up, but beneath the banter, Jaehyun grappled with emotions threatening to surface.

START OF FLASHBACK.

The dark room lit up with the moonlight and the desk lamp near her, Yuno smiled seeing Sienna was waiting at his place.

He closed their proximity by hugging her. Yuno always takes this kind of opportunity whenever she waits for him to come home after a long day from work. He feels relieved from his stress even with just one hug from his favourite person.

After letting him hug her, Yuno stared at her with curiosity “You’d spend the night here?”

Sienna gulped avoiding his gaze. "You went over my head and paid for my University fees without telling me." Her voice was monotone, standing up from where they were sitting.

"Oh, I guess it's too late for a surprise now." He looks up at her, smiling giddily. But, he recognizes her demeanour changes negatively, making his face drop in worry.

“Let me remind you, I'm not a girl who you could just simply pay for, Yuno.” She scoffs painfully. “If you think your grand gesture was cute, well news flash I’m disappointed.” Sienna attempts to calm her voice down, “You didn’t even bother to have this conversation with me!” But alas her blood boils with her tears slowly falling from her eyesight becoming an ocean of pain.

Yuno stood up straight. “It’s just money, Sienna.” He chortles, brushing his hair out of his face.“I don't want you to be stressed because of money.” Yuno huffs out, confused by her action. “I could always make more money for me– for us.” Yet he strives to get close to her, cupping her face with his hands softly caressing her stained cheeks. “And I can help you with that, can’t you see it? I want to support you so you can reach your goal!” His voice and face emitted torment, he hated how this situation occurred.

Her birthday was coming up, and all he wanted was to do something that alleviated her burden.

She removes his hands from her face aggressively, moving away from him.

“You think my family and I can’t handle our shit?” she sarcastically laughed, trying to stop her sobbing, though it was difficult to execute. Anxiously she bit her bottom lip harder.

He could sense her walls starting to appear once again, his nightmare slowly coming to life.

“Sure I'm struggling, my family is struggling.” The young lady asserts, “But I've experienced far much worse than this bullshit and we’ve survived.'' Sienna picked up a pillow and slammed it on the coach. “Why can’t you believe in me?!” With every word she screams out, the pillow gets slammed on the coach. Relinquishing her anger through the use of this method. She stopped her antics, breathing heavily. Sienna peer dead in the eyes of him. “I just needed more time to accomplish things, not all plans can sail smoothly.” Her voice cracked, eyes were gradually forming to puff.

“Sienna, I know how much you want to study again, despite not having it as your first choice with this course.” His body quivered, tears heavily forming as he scanned her figure.“Whenever I see how you recall your memories with your friends or when you help them study, you always have that spark.” He carries on describing his affection towards Sienna and how he witnessed her in the past years of their relationship. “I just want to bring that spark back.” He’s not the type who would just sit down on purpose. If he indeed has the means to help her out, even just a little he would do it in a heartbeat.

Life is hard and he desires to be a partner where she can lean onto him safely.

Yuno wanted to come closer to her, yet she immediately flinched and it broke his heart into pieces seeing her first instinct was to run away from him.

“Jeong Yuno, You’re not getting the point here.” Sienna sniffles as she shakes her head while gazing down on the floor. “We’re over.” she declares, with his furrowed brows “No.” He sternly demands.

She sneered, “After all of this, I'll do the grand gesture to finally break this relationship off.” With her last remark, her body evacuated from his place.

Yuno followed her out but she was too fast and he was too slow to handle the situation, he got lost finding her.

END OF FLASHBACK.

Jaehyun just bared his soul to Johnny, revealing the painful truth of his recent breakup with Sienna, a wound haunting him for three months. It marked a vulnerable moment for Jaehyun, who, until now, had grappled with the harsh reality and denial.

Unbeknownst to Jaehyun, Johnny already knew the heart-wrenching details. A week earlier, Kai, Johnny's girlfriend, had shared the relationship's demise with him. Though Kai hadn't intended to spill the beans, the weight of the secret pushed Johnny to convince her to share the truth.

The revelation left Johnny stunned. Sienna was dead serious with Kai, She didn’t want to entertain questions about them so only a few people got to know the real state of their relationship. Johnny unwittingly became one of those few.

Now, faced with Jaehyun's raw emotions, Johnny wrestled with the delicate balance between concern for his friend and utmost respect for their privacy. He had upheld his end of the bargain, bearing the weight of their shared secret. As a pillar of support, Johnny stood ready to help Jaehyun navigate the emotional turmoil, recognizing Yuno's need for that gentle push.

"How did you cope up?" Johnny delicately probed, shattering the unspoken barriers.

"After that night, every week I'd visit their house, hoping to find her. Eventually, I had to stop when a big project came my way. But I kept leaving messages, calls, even emails," Jaehyun confessed, his unwavering dedication to Sienna palpable. Two years into working with an architecture company, Sienna had been his anchor.

"Sometimes I'd order stuff to be delivered to their home. But after two months, I received a message from her. One message that I thought was my chance to come back into her life, and then I saw it." Jaehyun sighed deeply, the raw pain reflected in his eyes. "She sent: 'It's about time you stop this, don't tire yourself out."

That broke Yuno once again. It snapped his brain, and I focused on work, endless work, stuck at his place, never having an inch to socialize.

Earlier that morning, Jaehyun had grappled with anxiety before a crucial presentation. He dialled Sienna's number, seeking support, but as he hesitated his thumb hovered, preparing to drop the call. To his surprise, her mom picked up, offering words of encouragement and cheering him on.

"She hasn't told them," Johnny stated bluntly.

"No, and obviously I didn't have the heart to either," Jaehyun admitted, the weight of his emotions palpable. The conversation with Sienna's mom provided a brief respite, helping him get through the day and close a deal with clients.

"You're so down bad for Sienna," Johnny remarked, understanding the depth of his friend's emotions. As Jaehyun struggled to contain his feelings, Johnny encouraged him to let them out.

As if on cue, Jaehyun lets himself slowly reveal the emotions that’s been wanting to gush through his walls.

Well, to be fair, this wasn’t his first time crying. He sure had those little episodes in the craziest random time of the day where Yuno would have a mini breakdown remembering his situation with her.

Believe it or not, there was a particular night when he devestatedly couldn't sleep. He tried everything.

First, Yuno got himself up for a quick jog for him to wear out and took a warm shower, though it only made him feel more alive. So he resumed by drinking some wine as he watched a movie, played soothing music, and even read a book. But, it all went down the drain due to his brain failing to focus.

His last resort was masturbating. With no brainer, of course, he would think of her. Although, the fact that he remembers their moments together, he instead ended up crying that night and which made him fall asleep.

It was not the expected way, but it worked.

"I know I fucked up," Jaehyun confessed, tears flowing freely. "But how exactly? To the point she ended up breaking up with me?" The wounds deepened as he confronted the reality of his mistakes.

Johnny, offering comfort, reassured Jaehyun that Sienna's situation was tough. However, he pointed out that Jaehyun's well-intentioned actions were not executed correctly.

"Always remember this, Yuno. As much as you want to help people, you also have to remember where they're standing from. A good honest deed has a chance to appear as insensitive and patronizing," Johnny advised, hitting the core of the issue.

In the real world, complexities surpassed those of fairy tales and movies. Jaehyun realized he should have communicated with Sienna before assuming he could magically alleviate her problems.

Entering the diner, the music from the speakers greeted her. Setting the vibe already makes her feel at ease with the atmosphere where she’s hanging out tonight. Her gaze stopped wondering as she saw Kyujin and Minghao already sitting. Meanwhile, Seokmin was standing up talking on his phone. He has the right hunch that his friend has work left to discuss.

They greeted her as she put herself comfortably on her seat. She’s with one of her old university buddies. Due to her problem, she couldn’t keep up with her batch graduating on time. Nonetheless, they kept strong connections with each other even if they are now working and she’s back with her University life.

“Seokmin should have left his phone on aeroplane mode,'' Kyujin remarked as she shook her head from side to side. Minghao nodded, however, he pressed the thought “Well to be fair, it might be an emergency with work that he needs to mend.”

“At least he is paid though.” Sienna chimed smiling, Her friends knew for over those two years of her not attending university she was working on her corporate days before and tended to overtime as well. It’s not so different with her university work taking her life after hours, the only thing she was not paid to do overtime may it be her university and unfortunately her corporate days.

“Sorry about that, but no worries it won’t bother our dinner.” he smiled at them, “Give me your phone” Kyujin, as the mom of this group Seokmin simply followed her. “There.” his phone successfully turned out to be in aeroplane mode.

Sienna snorted, Seokmin was astounded by what her friend doing “I said I’m sorry” He pouted “Fine keep it on aeroplane mode. If there’s anything I’ll handle it tomorrow.” he said proudly, “Yeah, handle it on your working hours.'' Minghao, who is also a big advocate of work and life balance, reminded him as he patted his friend's hand.

As the night settles with them, Seokmin opens the topic “Nabi is out right with Jaemin’s family?” On the table while they started to eat their order.

The girl next to her nodded as she ate the cheezy fries ``Yeah and Kai, She has this workshop she needs to attend." She starts to explain her housemate's situation "So basically both of them will not be back until next week.''

With the new information, Kyujin excitedly clapped. “Well then, you have no excuses not to come. It’ll be fun. Besides, Mingyu deserves to have some OG guests.” Kyujin is always amazing at pursuing people and Sienna is always weak for her friend.

“Didn’t you say you wanted to drink this week, take this chance with us. It has free drinks and food anyway.” Comically his brows go up and down. “And you know what free food and drinks taste like.” He ends his last speech of temptation.

“A hit or miss.” She put her tongue out as she deadpans her friend.

Minghao laughed at the banter between Sienna and Seokmin. “We’re aware that you're not reliving the song ‘Stuck with U’ by Ariana Grande and Justin Bieber for letting yourself feel stuffed for a whole month in your apartment. ” He finally joined, even has the gut to make a joke out of her situation pulling a quote-unquote with his hand gestures. However, they were right Sienna when given a chance to stay at her comfort home would make the most out of it.

Although now she's on a dinner date with them; After a month of hibernation, she just now greeted the outside world properly. “It's not my fault that my subjects are eating me up. Besides, earlier I had to attend University onsite so plus points to that and now I’m already with you guys, here eating dinner.” Sienna puckered her lips, still up for this debate despite being conquered by those trio.

Seokmin snorted at Sienna’s last comment “Yeah, right!” letting his hand grab her head and squeeze it as if he was a crane and she’s a toy.

“Sizt no!” Kyujin pouted and shook her head daintily. “How about this since you’re already out of your cocoon, just try to spend some of the days this week outside.” she negotiates with the girl who does not care one bit about Seokmin’s antics as she’s busy munching her ice cream.

“Exactly, just end your week with good vibes, you’re no guard dog.” Minghao with his witty brain could not let her go, when those three come together it’s like Sienna is fighting against the world.

She sighs in front of them, letting her head roll over to her left side finally expressing her being defeated.

As if an accomplished couple made their child have nowhere to go but listen to them, Kyujin and Minghao high-fived each other and held their hands shakingly. It’s their mini-victory move. “If you guys keep being cute, I feel like ants would eat us up.” She joked.

Seokmin looked at the girl next to her cheekily “Oh Sienna, Sienna, Sienna” repeating her name in a sing-song tone, whilst shaking his head playfully. “You just miss someone.”

Minghao covered his mouth, acting surprised. “Offt Seokmin dropping the bomb.” Kyujin teased the fire, showing her actions with her hands dropping.

It’s been 8 months since the breakup.

Sienna squinted her eyes as if throwing daggers at him. “Oh, shut up.” She smacked his left shoulder.

Leaving them chuckling at their antics.

Quickly changing the subject, Sienna sits properly. “Fine, this Saturday I’ll attend Mingyu’s place.” Rolling her eyes dramatically “The booze should be great, or I'm out.”

Despite a busy schedule, Yuno got dragged out for a coffee successfully by his work partner Jungkook before they would drive to meet their client onsite.

Yuno’s eyes glanced at the interior of the cafe, and he stopped when he saw a familiar physique after a long time. It was Sienna focused on her laptop, wearing her signature hoodie with her glasses.

He and Jungkook sat near the cafe counter waiting for their order. The guy simply watched her and couldn't help but still have a longing feeling of adoration.

Of course, she’s not alone, she’s with two people that look like her classmates.

He smiled at his thoughts thinking she also might get dragged outside as well, which she truly needs. Sienna always tends to trap herself in her room, especially on a weekend; little sunlight isn’t enough for her.

Sensing that one of her classmates was about to look around, he avoided his stare at her and exactly with that their little buzzer turned on letting them know that their orders were complete to go.

On the other hand Sienna did mini stretches to her arms as Her eyes slowly looked outside the cafe and saw a familiar back, she steadily recognized when the view of the man got a good side view. “Oh it's Yuno...” she whispered, then it truly sank at her making her eyes widen, almost choking herself while she drank her matcha frappe.

“Omygod— Sienna!” Both of her friends reacted frantic, Giving her all the tissues they have to her.

"You good now? What happened?” Jungwoo queried and looked to where she was staring earlier, but failed to recognize what made their friend go nuts.

Sienna shakes her head “Oh no it’s nothing..” she tries to cover her tracks, could not even think of a proper excuse.

Seungkwan oozes suspicion with the younger girl but lets her know that it’s fine to not be forced to tell.

“I have this event I need to attend.” Jungwoo didn't prolong the weird air, taking the chance to express his dread.

Sienna laughed at the poor puppy. “Isn’t your parents' fundraising event?” Seungkwan recalled their conversation back then. “That's tough. Knowing your parents, they would want it to be perfect.” Sienna bluntly says. “Exactly, it’s going to be a pain in the neck.” Jungwoo rolled his eyes with exaggeration.

She isn’t well into those kinds of grand parties either. It only reminds her back then when she felt she was out of the picture whenever with Yuno.

The only thing she cares about is to support Yuno in whatever journey he has to accomplish, that's why she lets him take her in these events.

Nonetheless, some of the invitees couldn't be bothered hiding their expressions.

It continued until she ended up walking on eggshells while attending these events. She's well aware those people were irrelevant, and Sienna needed to be stronger.

However, with the compilation of Backhanded comments she receives:

"Well in your generation, love matters more."

"Oh darling, you'll have your time."

With those gazes, she could just disappear into thin air as if she were prey.

Little by little it consumed her.

Sienna’s train of thought snapped immediately.

"Earth to Sienna."

Seungkwan patted the girl's shoulder, bringing her back to their conversation.

"Sorry, what?"

Jungwoo pouted more than he could do and continued to ask them. "Are you guys free to be my dates this Saturday?" Hoping that they would agree to be together with his misery just to make something out of it and not worry about socializing much in the event.

"Pass." Seungkwan quickly replied while shaking his head left and right to his friend, "I got other things to assemble from our course organization seminar."

Sienna couldn't help but chuckle at Jungwoo's reaction when he started begging with his actions through his hands. "Sorry, but I have a party to attend as well." Pursing her lips tightly.

Seungkwan grabbed Sienna's left arm, wanting her to mimic the way he waved goodbye towards Jungwoo, "Be strong, Soldier." She played along with the guy next to her and both shared the same smiles with their two cents.

Sienna dressed up a bit, well it’s a party, after all. Her cute black mini dress complimented her heel loafers. She’s not going to lie it’s been a while for her to dress up, and it feels good.

As she stepped into the dimly lit venue, bathed in hues of purple and blue lights, a familiar voice cut through the atmosphere. "Sienna!" Kyujin’s excitement radiated as she embraced her. "Are the other two here already?" she inquired after the warm hug.

"Yup, we can huddle over there, it's much more comfortable."

Navigating their way to the living room, Sienna spotted Minghao and Seokmin, who were already in high spirits, sitting side by side with welcoming smiles.

"For a minute I thought you backed out." Minghao teased, earning a giggle from Kyujin.

Minghao's knack for reading people was, as always, on point. Sienna was hesitating for a moment at the entrance, with her heart pounding with uncertainty. The decision to attend this gathering had been a last-minute contemplation. She knew a few faces in the crowd, but it was the ghost of him that lingered in her thoughts. Earlier that day, an unexpected wave of nostalgia engulfed her, triggering what she reluctantly dubbed a "Relapse." She found herself tumbling down a rabbit hole of old photos and videos, relics of a time when they were entwined in each other's lives.

As she stood there, the weight of unanswered questions pressed upon her. Were the people around her aware of the demise of their once-shared world? A shiver of anxiety ran down her spine at the mere thought of being questioned about a love that now existed only in fragments of the past.

Eight months had passed, yet the grip he held on her heart remained unyielding. The invisible threads of their history continued to bind her, leaving Sienna entangled in a web of longing and unresolved emotions.

"Aye, don't be like that," she chuckled, waving her hand dismissively. "I even brought snacks." Seokmin, ever observant, noticed the packaging. "Oh! I guess the lady at that sweet shop was your mom then."

Sienna looked curious to him wanting him to continue. "Your mom was carrying a navy blue handbag right?" Sienna vividly remembers making her head nod.

Seokmin already felt proud with his keen eyes, no wonder the lady was familiar to him.

"I was in front of the store parking lot and got a glimpse of your mom Entering the store." He pointed out the sweet shop's name.

Her mom visited her earlier to personally break the news that her mom's land had already been sold with a very great offer. She expressed how she was so thankful that they waited and did not rush the selling of their property which led them to accumulate a huge deal.

In celebration, her mom remembers her daughter tends to like honey biscuits as the reason why she was at a sweet shop. Little did her mom know that the reason why she liked them was because Jaehyun influenced her since it was his childhood favourite sweets.

That was the trigger for her to this party since she had the feeling she would just dwell on her emotions at home alone. Distraction is highly needed.

After a couple of hours, Jaehyun arrived at the scene of the party. Mingyu greeted the guy and pointed to where Sienna was located.

Earlier, Mingyu had noticed Sienna alone in the corner of his sofa, engaging in a conversation with herself. Even to the untrained eye, it was apparent she had indulged a bit too much in the festivities. Her body tends to flop side to side with her head spinning lightly.

The three musketeers that she was with beginning at the party left earlier, and because of still not wanting her to leave early she stayed besides she put an excuse that some of the people she knew here she wanted to catch up.

Out of concern, he immediately contacted Yuno. Mingyu is one of those people who are not updated with the situation of the two people.

Yuno swiftly appeared in front of the lady, whose now trying her best to stay awake by softly slapping her cheeks and opening her eyes wide. In response, Jaehyun sighed and approached her, wrapping his flannel around her—his way of acknowledging how chilly she could get.

“You’re drunk, let’s go home.”

Sienna, with a pout, insisted, "I'm not drunk, just tipsy... I can still take it." She reached for her cup, but Jaehyun lightly caught her hand. "Sienna, please..." he pleaded. Reluctantly, she let go of the cup, covering her face with her hands. "Ugh, you're so boring; I don't want to go home yet." Despite her wobbly stance, a stark contrast to her claim of sobriety, she stood up.

Giggling, she attempted to stare at Jaehyun. Her brain, clouded by sweet toxins, transformed her surroundings into a hazy spectacle. Jaehyun, seizing the opportunity, gently gripped her figure securely and let her follow his body towards the exit. “You can get whiny when you're drunk.”

She bit her bottom lip, staring at him as her eyebrows furrowed. “N-No, I'm not” she chirped yet Jaehyun could still hear her as how close their bodies were now, he was left only to chuckle at her attitude.

Jaehyun was wearing his beanie and glasses, matching them up with the dim party lights, as to why Sienna has slow recognition due to her alcohol influence. However, her sixth sense just lets her guard down due to familiarity.

Pulling up to the car, Sienna settled herself comfortably in the front passenger seat. Jaehyun reached for the blanket tucked at the back and gently draped it over her figure.

“Can we open the window?” Sienna peered outside, where the street lights cast a soft glow. Jaehyun obliged, clicking the switch to let in the cool night air.

“Better?” He questioned, as he eased the car into motion.

She closed her eyes, letting the refreshing breeze envelop her. After stealing a glance at Jaehyun, she responded with a serene, "Yeah."

Fully aware now that she was in the company of Yuno, Sienna marvelled at how her instincts had effortlessly guided her away from the crowd and toward him.

“Is anybody at your home right now?" Hearing him, Sienna shakes her head slowly, her eyes remaining closed to contain the lingering dizziness.

"Both of them are out of town."

Jaehyun hummed in agreement, his thoughtful expression barely visible in the dimly lit car. "I can't leave you alone at your house. You should rest at my place instead, He declared that if there's an argument needed to be brought up it would be useless.

With Sienna's mind in its current state, his decisiveness didn't bother her. It was a welcome assurance amid the swirl of emotions she grappled with.

They both slowly entered Yuno’s place, easily passing by the lounge area to his private room. Letting the lady sit as he turned on the lamp next to his bed.

He took some cotton pads and makeup remover. It's been a while since he opened this particular side of his nightstand, back then it was her side of the bed anyway.

His hands gingerly swipe the damped cotton throughout her face, she looks entrapped by his aura, The way his eyes twitched and and his bottom lip bitting due to his hyperfocus, it might not be obvious but with her hazy view she could see behind his glasses are eyebags that has been a bit more obvious. With this situation, it brings back memories as if it were only yesterday.

"They're all clean." he huffs proudly as he returns the essentials to its container, "Let me get you some water." Before he could even get up, Sienna stole a kiss from him, jaehyun was caught off guard he flinched and stared at her flushed self. His eyes roamed from her sombre eyes gradually to her lips, breathing against each other– the air thick with anticipation.

Leisurely discarding his glasses, he leaned toward her. Eventually, his instincts couldn't resist the magnetic pull of the moment, and he found himself reciprocating the kiss. His dominant hand found the nape of her neck, while the left rested on her waist tightly.

Amidst the fog of sweet alcohol lingering from her system invading his space of mind. the kiss deepened, and their bodies drew dangerously closer within seconds.

With that snap of realization, Yuno stopped the act, dazed by her.

He would do anything for her, he constantly yearned for her even after all that happened. Yet, he refused to take advantage of her vulnerability. As he struggled to formulate the words he needed to convey, he grappled with the elusive thoughts.

He wanted to reassure her, to make her understand. But his brain seemed to be on strike, rendering him helpless.

Cold sweats build up over him, He suddenly feels like a teen boy who's in front of his huge crush.

"Sienna, I—" His words were abruptly cut short as she averted her eyes, rising slowly. As she hastened away, he found himself perplexed by the startling shift, his body instinctively following her.

Realizing the toilet room lights were open, he moved fast behind her. Already hiding how flustered he is.

Efficiently gathering her hair into a ponytail as she faced the toilet— letting out the toxins from her system. he offered a comforting rub on her back. His eyes fell on the drawer beneath the counter, remembering the hair ties she had left behind. He snatched one and secured her hair.

Perhaps, it had always been the right choice not to clean out the stuff she kept in his place.

"Take it easy," he hummed, attempting to access a smaller drawer, anticipating a towel within. All the while, he continued to rub her back, providing solace amid the discomfort.

With the final flush from the toilet, she ceased her ordeal. Jaehyun proactively used the towel to dab at her mouth. "Feeling better?" he asked, focused on the task.

She nodded, touching his hands and prompting him to halt. "I'm sorry.." she sighed, closing her eyes and braving the persistent dizziness. His gaze softened, taking in her dishevelled appearance, the messy ponytail he had made, her droopy eyes, and her flushed figure.

“Let’s go to bed—” he cleared his throat “Let’s take you to bed, you need to rest up hmm?.”

Her body went near him, and put her head on his chest “Don’t leave….” He looked down, already feeling his shirt getting drenched.

She is already crying.

He patted her head. "I won't," he assured, breathing heavily. "I won't leave you alone… so let’s go to bed." With a controlled but strained voice, he subdued the surging emotions.

Carrying her to bed, he tucked her in gently. Although he yearned to lie beside her, this wasn't the moment. He settled beside the bed on his rug, holding her hand, watching over her. As he hummed softly, he moved strands of hair away from her face, his quiet presence coaxing a serene expression onto her face.

Even in mere proximity, he found solace.

The sunlight tiptoed into the room, gently rousing Sienna from her deep slumber. A momentary panic seized her when her eyes landed on a head resting at the edge of the bed. Quickly regaining composure, she realized Yuno was sleeping on the floor beside her. His head lay on the mattress, while his body occupied the floor.

Her heartbeat slowed, confusion swirling in her mind as she tried to make sense of the situation. Battling a hangover headache, she opened her eyes gently, fixating on the man's face. It had been too long since she allowed herself to bask in the sight of him, and the ache of missing him resurfaced.

Almost by instinct, her hand lightly caressed his bangs, now dyed in a darker shade. Moving to his eyebrows and eyes, the familiarity felt both comforting and oddly unfamiliar after all this time.

His eyes twitched slightly, signalling his impending awakening. As her brain flashed fragments of memories from the previous night, embarrassment coursed through her.

Jaehyun's eyes fluttered open, meeting hers. Sensing her staring fixed on his lips, he gently grabbed her hand, preventing her from retracting her actions. "You're awake," she timidly said, attempting to downplay the significance of her actions.

She didn't get an immediate response, but now it was Yuno's turn to observe her. Despite having done the same the night before, this morning ritual fed his yearning for the simple moments they used to share.

"Do-Don't just stare at me like that," she uttered, biting her bottom lip.

"I'm sorry," he muttered. After a comfortable silence, she replied, "Don't bother, it's not like it's a big thing," avoiding his piercing stare, her cheeks flushing with warmth.

He shook his head slowly. "I have a lot to say sorry for."

Puzzled, her mind hinted at their last fight, the night they broke up. "I understand. It's not my decision to make."

"I should have talked with you before acting out my will with this, especially when it’s strongly sensitive for you… “ His voice became small but he needs to take accountability.

“I was selfish. I figured since I have the privilege to save up, all I could think was part of my savings was all about you."

"I should have known better."

Sienna always loved how pure this guy can get. She recognized the sincerity of his intentions. “I was too defensive and insecure to begin with every time I could see how people view us. I love how they take pride in you for what you do, but when I’m in the picture with you I could feel they always have this impression in our relationship that I’m not enough for you."

"I felt embarrassed, my inferiority complex burst." her eyes welled with emotion.

"You know I struggled to ask for help, and I always tried to conquer that, but when our last fight happened, it got me overwhelmed. It was an extreme gesture, and it felt like you were forcing me to be someone I'm not prepared to be." With his sincerity, she felt attacked and unsafe at that time. She was clouded by her negative thoughts and forgot she had him all this time – he was there to pick her up when she was feeling blue.

Yuno softened his gaze at her, “I’m sorry. I was so blinded and didn’t reassure you enough about our relationship, that it got to your thoughts. I don’t care about them, and I know it will be tough for you to immediately not care. So I’ll do my best to be there for you– reminding you to think of me and only me when you doubt, and I will never get tired of making you feel secure.”

She nodded and continued, "I’m fully aware that I have a lot on my plate, especially back then, working to support my family and myself." Her voice cracked as she struggled to compose herself. "And it's just so embarrassing how I know you so well. You’ve always wanted to help me— you’ve always been there, whether I’m struggling financially or whatever situation I'm facing. I just couldn’t take the bullet of reality that I needed to accept. “

Her eyes continued to sting. With every word she spilt, tears flowed down her cheeks.

He was the sunshine she couldn't handle.

"But I broke it. I promised you a slow and steady relationship."

Sienna looked at him stunned, he remembers.

“See you’re a guy who has a light that shouldn't be tainted.” she blurted out, sniffing.

Jaehyun shook his head slowly. Vividly his dimples, and a reassured smile carved his lips. “Sienna when I’m with you. I’m only a normal guy, a guy who loves you deeply, who wants to be with you.” He caressed her cheeks, gingerly wiping away the tears that streamed from her eyes.

Heart fluttering, realising once again that's she is truly in love with this person.

"I'll do better to make myself be deserving of you; I'll work hard.” She firmly stated, Her innocent orbs now filled with passion. “You did receive the money earlier, right?” After meeting her mom, Sienna transferred the money he paid for her university fees.

"You're more than enough, and I will always support you." Jaehyun held her hand tightly, bringing it close to his mouth. “And then, for the meantime, I’ll keep the money in my savings. That will be for us in the future.” He planted a soft kiss on her hand as if sealing a promise of his commitment.

“Besides, all I ever want is for you to spend your time with me – grow old together.” He whispered, his eyes reflecting a future filled with shared unwavering love. With those words, he painted a canvas of a lifetime. Sienna's heart swelled with a mix of emotions, and as they embraced, they both knew that their love story was not just a chapter but a timeless journey of growing old together.

I hope you guys enjoyed it!꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

89 notes · View notes