#so I guess it’s time to listen to some albums I’ve been meaning to listen to

[conshirtoe]

I’d like to give a quick shout out to my two favorite ladies at the moment. Give it up for Extra Strength Tylenol and 2048!!

[coco-loco-nut]

loml

pairing: max verstappen x reader

summary: a journey through your relationship with max

a/n: so for a little background... my ex (he wasn't an F1 fan, it was never gonna work, let's be real) broke up with me the night before this album was released, so writing this series has been very healing; however, this one was extremely difficult to write bc it's the only song i can't analytically listen to and find the deeper meanings yet, especially after losing your first love. sorry for the rant and making this short🙃

tw: emotional abuse, manipulation

masterlist ttpd masterlist part two

________

You and Max were fan favorites, it was evident to anyone with eyes who had eyes. But they say you never know what happens behind closed doors.

“She’s the love of my life,” Max would always say about you, looking at you like you held the universe in the palm of your hand. His fans could recite your love story by heart from how much he loved to talk about you. It only made sense that he could shatter that public opinion.

“Y/n and I have divorced, I would like to ask for privacy as we navigate the changes,” Max posted one day, his socials wiped of everything. Your accounts remained the same, your last post being from the fateful race months ago. You haven’t posted since. The fans should’ve realized when the WAGs and George unfollowed Max.

Your apartment was full of things that reminded you of Max, every time you walked in it reminded you of every memory. He was embroidered in everything. You look at a printed photo of when you first met him. Despite it being six months later, you couldn’t get rid of him.

~~~

All it took was locking eyes with him across the pier for you to fall in love on that breezy summer day. He walked up to you and asked you to join him, and you did. You kissed him at the top of the ferris wheel later that night, and you didn’t even know he was famous all you knew was that he made you feel safe. The breeze reminded you of the warm ocean breeze from that day, one you called the winds of fate.

Despite being young, you married him after a year of being together. Things weren’t perfect even then, he could be incredibly mean, but he was also a standup guy when it mattered. That erased any wrongdoing of his.

“You have made me a better man, you reformed me, the love of my life,” Max had said that fall evening, repeating the one line that brought you back to him every time.

You believed his words, his lies spun to make you believe the hell you were living in was actually heaven. When he takes his anger out at you, doesn’t defend you against his father, you start to second guess him but he calls you those four words.

“I’ll never leave you, Schatje,” Max holds you in his arms, your back against his chest as you both look at a tv in the Paddock. The fans loved that photo, calling your love legendary. They didn’t know about the growing hole in your heart.

Your marriage was looking like one of those black and white movies you and Max watch on snowy winter afternoons. You and Max had been talking about starting a family, but you couldn’t get pregnant and you were watching everything you loved slip away.

“God, Max, you are like a con-man. I feel like I’ve been sold a get-love-quick scheme. What happened to you?” you ask, voice laced with hurt, during an argument about it. Max just ignored you, pushing past to stream with some friend. He ignored the sobs coming from your bedroom. He told the chat that you are the love of his life when asked about you.

“Y/n, we need to talk,” some of the WAGs pulled you aside during a race. They told you how Max was shit talking you to other drivers, saying you were a waste of a wife for your inability to get pregnant, saying he should’ve never married you, pointing out every flaw he told you was beautiful when he was lying to your face. You stand up and leave, not saying a word even when the girls try to stop you. Max is confused but simply responds to your text saying you were sick with an okay.

You are laying in your bed sobbing when Max gets back from the race. You face the terrace, where you and Max would dance under the stars. You can see the ghosts of it through your tears, and you wished you could un-recall when you thought you had everything.

“Please get out of bed,” Max says, his concerned tone laced with venom. Maybe the ghosts of your relationship are embarrassed by the scene on the other side of the glass.

“No,” you cry, mourning the loss of your counterfeit relationship.

“I’ll be back in a few hours,” Max sighs leaving the room. You sent a text to the WAG group chat who helped you remove all your belongings from Max’s apartment into George’s apartment that he wasn’t using at the moment.

Your phone is flooded with messages from Max, so you turn it off unless you are talking to your lawyer. Max finds a divorce petition and your apartment key on the dining room table when he comes home from training a few days later. The relationship that had such a valiant roar ended with the blandest goodbye.

You sit in George’s apartment with Carmen and Lily drinking wine. You took over George’s lease after they insisted that you did.

“For someone who claims to be a lion, he sure is a manipulative coward,” Carmen says as the three of you comb through the years of lies he spun.

You took the dreams that you thought you and Max wanted and lit the match to destroy them with your divorce papers. Despite your somber eyes, you seem more at peace, even with the sadness you will carry with you until you die.

“He’s the loss of my life.”

part two

[gleamingyu]

hits different.

part I of the midnights series. inspired by taylor swift’s midnights. part II

pairing: music-producer!seungcheol x lawyer!fem!reader [exes-to-lovers]

genre: romance. slight angst. drama.

warnings: she/her pronouns for reader (but no specific physical characteristics). mentions of a pretty rough breakup. slight angst. some light cursing. mentions of death (jokingly though). terrible knowledge of law stuff (thank my brief interest in htgawm). yearning. loads of miscommunication. slow burn. cheol & reader are both stubborn. mentions of drinking. alternating povs. lower caps intended [if there’s anything i missed, please let me know!]

word count: 4.7k

notes: this is the first part of a new series i thought of! this is also my first time writing (or more like, finishing writing) something, so please be kind! any comments, reblogs or likes are welcome. and thank you to whoever decides to give this a chance :)

summary: still recovering from a not-so-fresh breakup, seungcheol leans on his friends to get back on his feet. it turns out to be much easier said than done, especially when his record label recruits the help of a law firm to deal with a recent scandal, which just so happens to be the same firm his ex works at. just his luck.

if anyone could see the scene in front of mingyu, they’d be severely concerned, much like he is at this very moment.

seungcheol is quite literally buried under a pile of blankets on his bed, the only visible part of his body a tuft of his dark brown hair. the floor of his bedroom is covered in clothes and empty food containers, and the air feels so stale and hot, it’s taking everything in mingyu not to gag. there is no light coming into the room except from the lightbulb shining in the hallway where mingyu is standing, and… is that… phoebe bridgers he can hear playing from somewhere?

mingyu glances down at his feet where kkuma, seungcheol’s devoted dog – and only girl who’s ever truly loved him, according to him – is sitting staring right back at him, a look on her fluffy face that mingyu swears looks just as depressed as her dad.

“this is way worse than i thought,” mingyu sighs, finally stepping into the bedroom. “okay, enough of this!”

mingyu grabs the blankets on the bed and pulls them away, revealing a very aggravated seungcheol. “what the hell are you doing?!”

“i’m not sure yet, because this,” mingyu gestures around the room, “is a lot. but it starts with you getting your ass out of bed and into the shower. immediately. this place smells like there’s a corpse somewhere in here.”

“yeah, it’s me. i’m the corpse. or i wish i was, because that would mean i’ve finally died,” seungcheol groans, turning away from mingyu and effectively shoving his face into the bed.

mingyu sighs, turning around to start collecting some of the dirty clothes on the floor. he finds himself regretting not calling jeonghan or joshua to come with him, because seungcheol might have been more easily persuaded to stop moping with them around. the reality is, they all thought seungcheol was doing better; he was back on his grind at work, finishing several albums he had been producing for, he was making progress in his jiu-jitsu classes, and he even joined the rest of the guys on their trip to australia last month, with minimal persuasion from his friends.

looking at the shell of a man laying on the bed in front of him, mingyu realizes he should’ve asked. he should’ve asked his friend how he was really doing, what he was feeling, what he could actually do to help him move past this.

better late than never.

“listen,” mingyu starts, going to sit on the edge of seungcheol’s bed but reconsidering. who knows when he last changed these. “i’m sorry if we haven’t really been there for you. i know a thing or two about breakups and heartbreak, so i guess i should’ve figured you weren’t alright, not like you said you were. you don’t have to keep all you’re feeling locked up. you can talk to us.”

seungcheol’s head moves slightly to the side, peeking at mingyu from the corner of his eye. he sighs, and turns on his back. mingyu tries not to cringe at seungcheol’s sullen face, his eyes red and still wet, as if he was still crying when mingyu arrived at his apartment.

“don’t beat yourself up, gyu. believe it or not, i was actually doing better. but a few days ago, i … i was cleaning around the closet by the entrance and …” he pauses, and mingyu thinks he might burst into tears. seungcheol breathes in however, closes his eyes, and continues. “i found one of her old hats. you know, the yellow crochet bucket hat she always used to wear in the summer? i bought it for her birthday when we had just started dating and … i don’t know, i just broke down. it hit me again that we’re over. like really.”

you and seungcheol broke up … four, five months ago? seungcheol shakes his head, he feels like time hasn’t passed the same since. days pass him by where he just goes over and over your last conversation – which was more of a fight, really – and he always ends up regretting everything he said that day. regrets resenting you for always working late, for never asking him to accompany you to firm events… regrets accusing you of some unspeakable things.

looking back, he can’t believe how big of an idiot he was. no wonder you left and didn’t even bother to come back to get your things. you left everything behind, all your clothes that still smelled of the lavender detergent you used to buy, your makeup haphazardly thrown into one of the bathroom drawers, the cooking books you always bought “for inspiration” but never, ever actually opened… and the yellow bucket hat you got from seungcheol for the first birthday you spent together. seungcheol had left everything where it was, a tiny part of him hoping you two would work this out somehow. but weeks went by with no word from you, and when he had tried reaching you, he came to the grave conclusion that you had blocked him on all platforms, cut him off from your life like a dead limb. back then he thought he deserved it. he still does.

“i’m sorry, hyung. i really am,” mingyu shakes seungcheol from his reverie, reaching a hand to pet his shoulder. a beat passes between them. “have you tried… calling her again since?”

“no. i don’t know what good it would do,” seungcheol sighs. “even if she answered, i doubt all the apologies i could offer would fix anything. i said some pretty fucked up shit.”

“yeah, i know. if you remember, i was there the next day ripping you a new one,” mingyu teases, desperately trying to cheer up his friend somehow. he swears he can see seungcheol’s lips twitch a bit. “but who knows… now that you both had some time to yourselves, you might actually be able to overcome this calmly. and if… if it doesn’t work out in the end, at least you’ll both have some closure.”

closure. that’s a funny word, because seungcheol wants the furthest thing from closure. he wants you back in his bed and your arms around him, he wants your indie artists he’s never heard of playing around the apartment in the morning, he wants your laugh echoing in the halls. he wants you.

he knows that the only way this ending could even be a possibility would be if he actually took mingyu’s advice and called you up, but another part of him is terrified of the other possibility: the one where you pick up and tell him to go to hell and fuck himself and never call you again or show his face around you. so for now, seungcheol opts for a third option: emotional limbo, with a side of trying-to-move-on.

he gets up from the bed and asks mingyu if he could help him straighten out the place. mingyu, bless his sweet heart, of course says yes and gets to work after sending seungcheol to clean himself up. just as he’s about to close the bathroom door, he hears mingyu’s exasperated voice.

“oh, for the love of god, where is that god-awful music coming from?!”

seungcheol can’t remember the last time he laughed so heartily.

the bar you find yourself in is bustling with people, laughter and cheerful conversations filling the space. you’re only half listening to whatever topic your two best friends, yunjin and chaeyoung, are discussing – something about “that bitch” in yunjin’s department at work that’s been giving her a hard time – instead reveling in the pleasant buzz of the champagne you’re nursing.

it had been a while since you were able to enjoy a nice evening with your girls. the past few months had been filled with endless meetings, client-induced headaches and sleepless nights, but thankfully, today you had managed to finally strike a deal for one of the firm’s most important clients (to be read as filthy rich), which you had been working towards all these months. naturally, upon hearing the news, chaeyoung and yunjin had begged you to join them at a bar in the city, “to celebrate your newfound freedom.”

you splurged on a bottle of champagne for the three of you and decided that tonight, you were going to have fun. you were going to relax, enjoy some drink, and catch up with your friends who you hadn’t seen in weeks.

and you will not, under any circumstances, bring up seungcheol.

you like to believe that in the last two months you had gotten better at shutting out any thought of your ex-boyfriend. in the days – more like weeks, if you were to ask chaeyoung and yunjin – following the ugly breakup, you were quite the literal mess. finding yourself alone and with nowhere to go, considering you had left the apartment you shared with seungcheol with nothing but your work stuff (how on-brand for you), it wasn’t surprising that your mental and emotional health had taken a massive hit. thankfully, at the insistence of yunjin, you agreed to crash at her place while you put yourself back together and took time off from work – something you had never done before.

to the surprise of your friends, it only took you two weeks to go back to work and start looking for your own place. two weeks after that, you were moving into a new apartment and claimed that you were feeling much better since the breakup. or at least starting to. chaeyoung and yunjin didn’t want to argue with you on this – even thought they 100% believed the front you were putting up was a load of crap – but in the end, they didn’t even have to, because the first time you went out with them again since the breakup, you had your first meltdown.

but was it really your fault that the man sitting two seats down the bar from you had ordered whiskey neat, just like seungcheol always used to? and was it really your fault that he was wearing a maroon leather jacket similar to the one seungcheol always used to wear in the fall, which you absolutely adored?

could they really blame you for bursting into tears right then and there and wailing about how much of a jerk seungcheol was for never understanding your dedication to your work? how much of a hypocrite he was for expecting you to just dip from the office when he suddenly had some free time, when he had never done so for you?

that night, chaeyoung and yunjin quite literally dragged you back to chaeyoung’s place and held you while you cried yourself to sleep, and in the morning, when you had embarrassingly admitted that “no, you weren’t really doing fine,” they held you again and offered soft-spoken words of support, opting to keep the classic we told you so in their thoughts.

four months passed since that incident and now, you could confidently say that you were truly feeling better. you weren’t quite over seungcheol per se; there were nights when you still thought about the smell of vanilla that filled the room whenever he was fresh out of a shower, the way he always got so giggly when you brought home a tray of cherries… yeah, you still found yourself missing him terribly sometimes. but the more time passed, you realized that seungcheol hadn’t tried reaching you at all in the months since the breakup, and so you thought he might be moving on as well.

it is true you had blocked him on all social platforms for weeks after you stormed out of your place. but on a particularly bad day, when all you did was cry and cry and cry after him, the thought of calling him up and asking him to go back to how things were crossed your mind, and you unblocked his number. unfortunately, your pride had set itself in your way, convincing you that it was seungcheol that needed to make the first step, considering he was the one who quite literally cornered you into a fight. so you didn’t call and instead prayed to whatever forces exist in the universe, that seungcheol would try your number again.

he never did.

“soooo, cheers to the lady of the hour! finally free from the clutches of corporate law!” yunjin cheered, clinking her glass against yours and knocking you out of your reverie.

damn it, seungcheol, i said i would not think of you tonight!

“yes, cheers!” chaeyoung joined in. “how do you feel? are you going to get a big ass bonus for the amount of time you put into this asshole?”

chaeyoung was probably right, you probably did deserve a huge ass bonus for the deal you pulled for the client you were handling. when you were in law school, you had never imagined yourself working for sleazy, corporate pigs who behaved like none of their actions would bite them in the ass eventually, and expecting others – like yourself – to clean up after them. but, as your boss grimly explained to you the day you had complained about your client, everybody has to start somewhere. “and junior partners don’t get to choose cases, sweetheart.”

life at the firm wasn’t always terrible. you were lucky enough to be part of an amazing team, and the firm worked with plenty of influential and big personalities, so you almost never had to worry about your income. but sometimes, some of the people you were asked to represent brought you to the brink of just quitting your job altogether.

“i just feel relieved,” you say. “if i had to hear the incessant whining and nagging of that idiot for one more day, i might have gone insane!”

“well, thank god you’re a stellar lawyer and managed to get rid of him,” yunjin teases, taking a sip of her drink. “do you already have anything else lined up?”

“god, no! i have a few days off just to take care of paperwork, maybe help out some of my colleagues around the office… but nothing big for now, thankfully.”

“oh, that’s amazing! which reminds me, this means you can actually join us on that weekend spa trip we were talking about last week,” chaeyoung happily suggests, as she’s already pulling up the website of the spa retreat.

“i guess a spa day would be nice,” you say, looking over at chaeyoung’s phone. you feel your body already going lax at the thought of a hot stone massage.

“oh, that would be so nice!” yunjin pouts. “we haven’t gone on a girls trip in so long! i miss going away, just the three of us… do you guys remember that trip we took to croatia two years ago? that was the best one we ever did, i swear!”

while chaeyoung joins yunjin in reminiscing about all the trips the three of you took over the years, you feel your phone buzzing in the pocket of your dress paints. pulling it out, you see an email notification…

“oh, no…” your voice trails off, reading over the email you had just received.

“what? what’s the matter?” yunjin asks, her conversation with chaeyoung coming to a halt.

“my boss just emailed me. he wants me in the office tomorrow morning. some big case that just came in,” you explain, already feeling a headache coming in.

“but tomorrow’s saturday,” chaeyoung frowns.

“i know… i know.”

when monday rolls around, seungcheol really wished that he had died before mingyu had found him the week before.

the day started normal enough. he woke up at 5 a.m. and took kkuma for a walk in the park near his apartment building, just like every morning. by 8 a.m., he was already set up in his studio inside the PLEDIS building, ready to work on the tracks he was supposed to finish mixing by the end of the week. seungcheol liked the buzz of the label, people from all different departments running around trying to stay on their schedules; it motivated him to also do his part diligently, and reminded him that he was extremely lucky to be doing one of the things he loves most: music.

seungcheol should’ve guessed something was up today the moment the clock struck 11 and jihoon, the other in-house producer of PLEDIS, and one of his oldest friends, hadn’t come by his studio. he and jihoon had known each other since their college days, having met in an audio engineering class they apparently shared, and had been friends for 8 years now. during their last year of college, they were recruited by a record label that was just starting out (which became the PLEDIS of today), and despite all warnings from their families, they decided to take a leap of faith together and join the company. it all worked out for the better, it turned out, as PLEDIS only grew and soon became a household name in the music industry.

as the only producers that have stuck around PLEDIS since the beginning, they developed several… traditions, or rituals over the years, one of which was jihoon’s 11 a.m. coffee run, which they’d spend sharing ideas and notes over each other’s work, and, if jihoon was in a particularly good mood, engage in some office gossip (not that either of them would ever admit it). today, however, jihoon is a no-show and seungcheol can’t help but wonder what his friend is up to.

when he shoots jihoon a quick text, asking if he’s alright, his friend only replies with a “just busy,” and tells seungcheol not to wait up for him at lunch, as he’ll probably be stuck in the studio all day. this doesn’t surprise him that much, seeing as jihoon might be an even bigger workaholic than he is, but he still can’t shake the feeling that something must be up with his friend. he decides that instead of going out for lunch, he’s gonna pick up some takeout and join jihoon in his studio. he wouldn’t be able to rest easy knowing his friend will go a day without eating anything.

once lunch hours begin, seungcheol takes a quick walk two blocks down the street to the restaurant mingyu works in, who’s already waiting for him with the food seungcheol had requested for him and jihoon. on his way back to PLEDIS, he texts jihoon again, just to make sure he’s still in the studio, but there’s no answer, and now seungcheol is seriously starting to get worried. he jogs the rest of the way until he’s back inside the building, and takes the elevator to the 6th floor where jihoon’s studio is stationed.

walking up to the door that reads UNIVERSE FACTORY, he stops in his tracks when he hears more than one voice from the other side of the door. he easily recognizes jihoon’s voice, but the other voices – two other men and a woman – are harder to make out. except… except the woman’s voice is eerily familiar, and without a second thought, seungcheol grips the handle and swings the door open, four pairs of eyes whipping in his direction.

his eyes land on jihoon, who looks like he wishes he was anywhere else in that moment, and then scan the rest of room, recognizing mr. han, their CEO, and… you. it’s you.

seungcheol feels like he’s going to faint. mr. han does not look the least bit happy about seungcheol’s intrusion, and he really wishes the man would slap him just so he can know for sure if he’s dreaming. if you’re surprised to see seungcheol, your face shows no sign of it, and seungcheol can’t help but stare at you. you look so beautiful, so put together; your make-up is soft, almost unnoticeable, your hair pushed behind your ears, and you’re wearing a dark green suit… oh, how he loved you in green.

you were the picture of grace and professionalism and he was… not. he really wishes he hadn’t come to the studio in sweatpants right now.

“mr. choi, what a… surprise,” mr. han exclaims, standing up from his seat, you and the other man – who seungcheol has no idea who he is, but he knows he doesn’t like the way he’s standing so close to you – following suit. “i didn’t know mr. lee was expecting you,” mr. han continues, glancing towards jihoon, who turned red as a tomato.

“i wasn’t, actually,” jihoon squeaks, avoiding both seungcheol and mr. han’s gazes.

“i apologize, i was… i was just bringing jihoon some lunch. i didn’t know there was… a meeting happening,” seungcheol says, looking towards you, and he’s almost thrown back by the way you’re just… staring directly at him.

mr. han sighs, but remembering the situation, he quickly puts on a polite smile as he turns towards you and the other man. “mr. choi is one of our other in-house producers. mr. choi, this is mr. jeon and miss L/N. they’re helping us with some… legal matters.”

so that’s why you were here. and who the other guy was. but what legal matters? and why was jihoon involved? and why didn’t he tell seungcheol?!

before seungcheol can ask more questions, mr. han gestures towards the door he came through and says “now, if you don’t mind, you can come back in a few minutes, mr. choi. we’ll be done soon.”

soon. soon, his ass!

seungcheol had been pacing the hallway outside jihoon’s studio for the past 20 minutes (he checked, he wasn’t exaggerating!), trying very hard not to eavesdrop through the door, and thinking of every possible reason why jihoon would need legal help and why you would be here.

jihoon was definitely in some kind of trouble. for the CEO to be involved as well, it for sure must be something that could affect the whole label. seungcheol just can’t understand why jihoon wouldn’t tell him if he had any kind of problem. they were colleagues, but most importantly, they were friends. he would’ve dropped everything to come to his aid.

now, when it comes to you… seungcheol knows you’re a lawyer, obviously he does. he met you when you were halfway through law school, and he was there for every failed and aced exam, for your graduation (he was so proud of you that day, it was the first time you’d ever seen him cry), for every measly job you had before finally securing the one you currently held at one of the top firms in the city. he also knows you’re a damn good lawyer, seeing how hard you work and how dedicated you are. he supposes it’s not surprising you were chosen to represent jihoon in whatever mess he got himself in.

he feels bad now that he remembers how he held these things above your head during your last fight. how you were working late so often, how you never asked him to join you at office parties, despite how eager you always were to go out with your coworkers for drinks, how you always asked him to wait for you outside the office building, as if you didn’t want people to know you had a partner...

he knows that both of you were to blame for how things went down between you, but since he started the argument in the first place, he thinks he could’ve brought all this up in a better way, at a better time.

his thoughts are interrupted when the door to jihoon’s studio opens again, and he finds himself regretting waiting in the hallway because now he has to face you again and he’s not ready and he doesn’t know what to say and he still looks like a hobo and –

“mr. choi!”

he looks up to see who he imagines is your colleague – mr. jeon – step towards him, as you and mr. han step out after him, discussing something. you glance once towards seungcheol before turning back to the conversation, and seungcheol feels his heart clench.

“mr. jeon, i’m sorry once again for interrupting your meeting,” seungcheol says, extending his hand to shake mr. jeon’s.

“don’t worry, no harm done at all. i’m actually glad you stuck around, because i had something to ask you. seeing as you and mr. lee are close, would you be available for a short talk with us, sometime in the next days? we’ll have to build a strong case for mr. lee and, well, some insight from his colleagues would be very helpful,” mr. jeon explains, fixing the thin-rimmed glasses perched on his nose.

seungcheol is taken aback by the man’s soft tone. his sharp eyes and cold look on his face made him look pretty intimidating, but his voice is the complete opposite, putting seungcheol weirdly at ease.

“o-of course, anything for jihoon,” seungcheol quickly replies. “can i ask, though, what exactly does he need help with?”

“plagiarism.”

“PLAGIARISM?!”

“you’re being sued. for plagiarism.”

“yes.”

“and you just found out last friday.”

“yes.”

“last friday when we all went out for barbeque and you didn’t even think to mention it? not even once?!”

“will you stop pacing and sit down? you’re making me even more nervous than i already am,” jihoon sighs, dropping his head in his hands.

seungcheol sighs as well, muttering a sorry, and sits down on the couch opposite jihoon’s chair.

jihoon continues. “i didn’t mention anything because i didn’t want to piss on everyone’s good mood. it was joshua’s birthday… besides, i didn’t know all the details of the situation at that point. i thought it was another baseless accusation, you know? but they’re serious about it. they wanna take me to court.”

“what? that’s insane,” seungcheol says. “i feel weird even asking, but did you even plagiarize?”

“no! of course not! i don’t even know the people!” jihoon exclaims, flopping down on the couch next to seungcheol. he lets out a long groan. “this is just what i needed.”

seungcheol pats his friend’s back, thinking of some encouraging words. jihoon was the most talented and creative guy he knew. to think that someone would accuse him of using somebody else’s work was a concept seungcheol couldn’t even entertain.

“don’t worry. that jeon guy looks like he’s already got a game plan.”

“and Y/N,” jihoon says.

silence falls around the two of them, until jihoon stirs from the couch, sitting up to look at seungcheol.

“are we just not going to acknowledge her or what?”

“no! that’s not what i…” seungcheol sighs, hanging his head. “i just wasn’t expecting to see her. i don’t know how to feel.”

“that’s understandable. you guys haven’t seen each other in a while, right?”

seungcheol shakes his head. “did she… did she say anything to you?”

“oh, no. she was super professional, went straight to business. but…” jihoon trails off, debating whether he should say what he was thinking.

“but? but what?!” seungcheol grabs jihoon’s shoulders, shaking him a little.

“but i think she was just as rattled to see you as you were. her hand kept shaking while she was writing, after you left. i guess she was just better at hiding her surprise,” jihoon continues. “now let go of me, you animal!”

seungcheol sighs. could it be that you were just as much of a mess inside as he was? the hopeful part of him thinks you might have thought of him all these months, just as he thought of you. the other part of him thinks your hand might as well just have been shaking from anger.

“you know, this might be a good thing,” jihoon says, getting up and sitting back in front of his computer.

“what, you getting sued and her being around?”

“yeah. maybe this way you’ll finally grow some balls, put your pride aside, and actually fix things,” jihoon deadpans, and seungcheol knows the conversation is over.

yeah. easier said than done.

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

TTPD Track Speculation/Prediction: @wavesoutbeingtossed Edition

Against my better judgment, I’m putting down my predictions before I am proven completely wrong on April 19.

on the other hand I did correctly attribute all of the 1989 TV vault track teaser lyrics to their songs before it was released so maybe I’m just that good jk.

I’m putting everything under a cut because it’s long and mostly just shooting the shit but it’s a long weekend so what the heck!

I started writing this the night the album was announced at the Grammys in February, so obviously things may have evolved in the meantime. It will be very interesting to see just how wrong I am!

Here be speculation, musings, jokes and more! Enter at your own risk!

SOUND:

I honestly have NO CLUE. I’ve said many, many times that I would be absolutely gagged for an Americana-folk type sound like Carolina/Safe and Sound/some of her acoustic performances on tour. I don’t really expect TTPD to sound quite that stripped back, though. (Prove me wrong, Taylor!)

I am kind of feeling pop-rock-y though, à la WCS, TTDS, based on absolutely nothing but that is also a genre/sound I love that I am begging to hear more on albums.

Completely off the wall guess: Something more jazzy-big band-y, based on nothing but her styling in recent months on the red carpet that harkens back to golden age of Hollywood vibes (especially the Grammys), the inclusion of Clara Bow (renowned flapper girl) on the track list, and the way she keeps talking about being grateful fans accept her bending and switching genres over the years and support her when she does “weird” things.

FORMAT (?)

OK this is just me spitballing, but I said awhile back that I am just getting vibes that there may be, like, a story within a story with this. As in, using some fictional settings as an allegory for the story about herself. The example I used then was The Lumineers, and how they wrote their album III about three generations of a fictional family dealing with addiction, which was an allegory for the lead singer’s own family’s experience with it (without directly calling out the family member in question at the time). There were characters in the album, but many of the songs were sung from an “I”/“you” perspective. I may not be explaining myself well, but I wouldn’t be surprised if there are “fictional” stories in that they’re sung about characters (e.g. Clara Bow?), but it will be obvious to fans that she’s using the characters to speak about herself and her experiences. I’m just getting big “storytelling” energy from the hints. Which means I’m totally wrong!!!! Don’t listen to me!!! (I do think there will be some shades of this somehow, though.)

TRACK LIST SPECULATION

Fortnight: Think you are all on the money about it being the time between the start of tour and when Joever happened for good. Sort of a “two years of uncertainty coming to a head in two weeks” thing. Spending two weeks agonizing over what to do. Two weeks for your whole life to blow up. Finally being removed from the situation and grasping onto your dreams that have been on hold for years and realizing your mind’s made up because you won’t give this part of you up even if it means letting go of what you thought your future held. But another thing I’ve thought of: some common wisdom claims it takes two weeks for a new routine to become a habit, so… outside chance it’s like, two weeks go by and you’re finally used to/accepted whatever it is you’re trying to kick? Also had a thought that there could be many two-week periods that can mark your life and give pause. 

The Tortured Poets Department: No idea really lol. For some reason I feel like this is going to be a little more experimental, “laying the groundwork for the defense” type of vibe, kinda like Mastermind, or using the investigative/academic metaphor to delve into it like, Mad Woman or Vigilante Shit. (Or: it could be super petty roasting the infamous group chat lol. In all seriousness though I would doubt that because I feel like this album is very much about Her… unless said group chat was so insufferable she needs to blast it on main.)

My Boy Only Breaks His Favourite Toys: I saw some talk on my dash about this giving renegade themes (you fire off missiles because you hate yourself but don’t you know you’re demolishing me), and I totally thought the same thing. Also those of you who pointed out the parallels to Cardigan are geniuses (when I was an old cardigan under someone’s bed you put me on and said I was your favorite). Again kinda think there might be some more metaphor in this but guessing it may be along the lines of “he’s only doing this because he knows I won’t leave” themes? It instantly gives dark and uneasy. It gives, the people you love are the ones you hurt the most. All signs point to Not Good.

(Or this is about Benji destroying his spin toys or is that just my cat that does that.)

Down Bad: Someone said (on Jaime’s blog I think*) that this is giving False God but icky and I can TOTALLY see that. (Then again I’ve always found False God sad in the sense that it’s like, “even when we fight so bad we can’t communicate we still have the sex holding us together.”) But, Taylor does like to take sayings with common meanings and twist them on their heads, so I also wouldn’t be surprised if “Down Bad,” isn’t referring to being down as in being horny for someone, but being down as in, feeling devastated/hopeless. (Or, even worse, mean both at the same time. 😵‍💫)

(*I wrote this post in February after the announcement, I don’t have a clue when any of this was said anymore sorry)

So Long, London: like a lot of people, I feel like this is her goodbye to the life they had and more importantly/poignantly, the dreams she had of their future. (I don’t know but, “remember looking at this room we loved cause of the light, now I just sit in the dark and wonder if it’s time” just feels like it’d be part of this story.) So because I’ve said that, watch it be an excoriation of London Boy lol. (You know I’m mad at a London Boy / who just really won’t leave Camden / Market in the afternoon / he hasn’t seen my American smile / in two months cause he won’t come to see me / when I have a show to do…) Feel like it’s going to gut us. BUT, also wonder if this is her “I’m getting the fuck out of dodge ROCK FLAG AND EAGLE” anthem haha. (Or: she ran away to London to escape the Bad Stuff but then got stuck in another kind of Bad Stuff living there for so long…)

But Daddy I Love Him: Pretty obviously the Little Mermaid reference. Very curious if the actual quote is in the song, or if it’s just named that to set the scene but the song instead is an expounding on the theme of giving up her voice for the sake of the relationship like Ariel. Also wonder if this is an overtly diaristic song or if she is going to use characters/figures/fiction to expand on the theme subtly, a little like Maisie Peters’ History of Man or Florence & The Machine’s Cassandra or even more pointedly like her own Last Great American Dynasty or The Lucky One. I do assume the overarching theme is going to be the push-pull between keeping her love and giving up things that are important to her to make that love work.  (Watch this be about her arguing with her father about marrying *** lol.)

The theme of giving up your voice/what you hold dear for love is so loaded, and has some parallels to Clara Bow’s story, which is also on the track list so… Lots to chew on I’m sure.

Fresh Out The Slammer: Totally think the reference to her locking herself up for years at home because she was scared in the Time POTY interview is a likely link to this. Feeling free after the weight of this decision is off her shoulders, yet the sheer terror at now being on her own and rebuilding her future. It could be uplifting but I could also see it being like pure chaos. BUT, a thought I had earlier is that, if this is a song that was written pre-Joever, maybe it’s about the aftermath of a rough patch. Like, we just got our get out of jail free cards, we made it through the other side of this Big Thing that almost ended us (e.g. the final blow in YLM), where do we go from here?

Florida!!!: Emphasis on the “!!!”!!! Honestly it had me at FLORENCE AND THE MACHINE. I’m soooooo curious and sooooooooooooo pumped for this one. I don’t want to let myself hope it’s going to sound like a Florence song BUT I HOPE IT SOUNDS LIKE A FLORENCE SONG. I’m going to guess it may be a reference to the first stop on tour after the news broke. Wasn’t that also a show where a ton of things went wrong? I can see it going so many ways! Is it a hopeful “Florida I’m coming for you you’re a symbol of my great escape my prison break my entire life crumbling and rising again”? An introspective “I never thought I’d have to rebuild my whole world after it imploded, in Florida of all places?!”? Is it a sarcastic “fucking Florida always the scene of the crime I can’t believe my life is falling apart and I need to go to FUCKASS FLORIDA oh great every thing that can go wrong with my show is FLORIDA!!!!”? Is it a rant about the corporate mouse? Or a scathing takedown of Republican politics ahead of the 2024 elections? (lol) Who’s to say?!

Guilty as Sin?: Sooooooooooo curious about this. I’m a Carolina Stan and I know there is 0% chance there is a link between the two songs other than the lyric which is a common term, but it does make me happy. My first thought about this one is that it’s going to be biting or self-reflective — kinda like the bridge of Is It Over Now? Or the chorus of Anti-Hero. As in, “what is it exactly that you think I’m guilty of?” (E.g. ambition? Drive? Seeking attention? Being selfish? But could also be sad: Loving too hard? Caring too much? Being too needy? Hmmm.) I’m kind of feeling like it’s a “if it’s wrong to be guilty of these things I don’t want to be right.” Again if I had to guess I’d wonder if it would have the same vibes as the bridge of YLM. (For some reason, with the question mark, I don’t necessarily think it’s going to be accusing someone of something…)* I also had a thought about the seven deadly sins and this title and… THOUGHTS ARE THINKING**.

(*I may not have found it accusatory in February, but with the benefit of hindsight in March I… reserve the right to change my mind about this.)

(**Future Waves here: the thoughts may have been thinking for February Waves but March Waves has no idea what she was talking about.)

Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?: I don’t knooooooooooow. At first the title kinda gave me Blank Space vibes, like, you don’t know how much I could fuck this up if I wanted. Then some people mentioned the similarity to Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? And now that’s absolutely all I can think about. If you’ve ever seen the movie (or the play), it is rooooooooough. Watching George and Martha drunkenly eviscerate each other as their guests watch on in horror is… oof. (As someone who has seen this happen in real life and was trapped on a boat with a couple in full unhinged mode… OOF. Just OOF.) Of course there’s the Burton-Taylor of it all too so… (there’s also an interesting theme in Virginia Woolf about buying into illusion to avoid the messiness of reality… and Martha resenting George’s lack of ambition.) Is this song cheeky? Or a threat? Is this a Better Than Revenge/Vigilante Shit rebuke or is it Bejeweled owning her personhood?

(Like any of these songs, there’s also the chance that it’s heartbreaking and is really a reflection on how the things that make her her can be weaponized against her… Or how her struggles/vices alienate her to the person she loves a la Anti-Hero…)

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can): My first thought is this is going to be one of her sarcastic/satirical/funnier ones, based on nothing except that this sounds like it could be an Olivia Rodrigo cheeky song lol. (Like, I immediately start singing this to the tune of “Get Him Back.”) Never beat those allegations, Taylor, we’ve all been there. It definitely feels like a stereotypical tale of “girl tries to fix a man who doesn’t want to change and refuses to give up.” Watch this actually be a sad ballad about the flip side of renegade and trying to help a partner through a crisis 😬 

loml: the quiet menace in this list!!!! Obviously we’re all immediately thinking “love of my life,” but because this is Taylor, we should not rest easy. The fact that it’s all in small caps is curious to me and calls back to text speak, so is this a term of endearment that turns into a final parting sign off? Is it from an email ahem? Is it a sweet song about the good parts of being together? A wistful song about a lost love? BUT THEN, because it’s Taylor, I can totally see this being a bait and switch and it standing for something else as some of you pointed out, like loss of my life, or love OR my life. Or something entirely different. I’m pretty convinced that this one is going to be devastating in some fashion. I just feel it in my bones.

I Can Do It With a Broken Heart: Like many of you, I’m fairly certain this is going to be a bittersweet Long Live-esque ode to the Eras tour. The pick yourself up by the bootstraps, get out of bed, the show must go on and the show is saving my life story. Just thinking of the quote from the Time POTY interview where she said, “I know I’m going on that stage whether I’m sick, injured, heartbroken, uncomfortable, or stressed.” And in those early weeks, it seems like she might have been all of those things at once. Just trying to talk yourself into getting out of bed when all you want the earth’s core to swallow you whole and never come back. Kind of like, I can pick up the pieces of my life and carry on even when I am dying inside. 

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived: Obviously this is about one Benjamin Button, please. OK, in all seriousness, it’s giving, well… *shots fired*. It’s giving “your integrity makes me seem small.” It’s giving “I’m a monster on the hill, too big to hang out.” It’s giving “all you are is mean.” So, part of me thinks it’s going to be turned on its head a little bit, just because… it seems to point to something directly and sometimes Taylor enjoys a bit of misdirection. So is this about someone who takes shots at someone else and in so doing, displays their own insecurity? Another thought I had is: Is this about someone who retreats into their own world so much that they’ve shut out everything and everyone else? Their whole world gets shrunken down to the four walls around them? I have a strong feeling this is an allegory-type song, using a fictionalized and possibly fantastical story to tell the real life one, but obviously I could be wrong.

The Alchemy: gonna be real with you all: I didn’t know that alchemy was the practice of turning base metals into something that looks like gold. I think I was mixing it up with apothecary or something, lol. I thought it was the practice of making potions and whatnot. #TheMoreYouKnow ANYWAY, I think the idea of “turning nothing into something that shines” is going to be important. Is it about using her best colours for a portrait to hide the cracks underneath? Is it about trying your best to make something work and thrive but ultimately coming up empty because the foundation is gone? Is it about turning these base experiences into art that fuels her? There are so many possibilities! (@taylortruther’s post about The Alchemy and other comments got me thinking too about the magician/illusionist scenario in So It Goes and now my brain is on fire.)

Clara Bow: Soooooooooo intrigued by this one too. People have pointed out so many of the interesting coincidences and parallels in their lives. Clara Bow was a silent film star who found her voice in the talkies — that right there is one metaphor about finding your voice in your art and your life. But it’s also an interesting parallel that she managed to parlay her success in silent film into talkies, at a time where few actors enjoyed a successful transition, which mirrors Taylor’s transition from country to pop. There’s the way Clara’s private life was splashed all over the press, driven by salacious rumours about her sex life and her perceived revolving door of lovers, which seems like something Taylor would empathize with. There’s the way she had a breakdown and left Hollywood, which may have some shades of 2016. Or that she got married and started a family, but insisted on keeping it a secret for many years to maintain privacy, which is interesting because in this case it seems like *Clara* was the one driving the need for secrecy, not her husband. (At least I read that in one article somewhere, sorry if that’s wrong!) Ultimately though, she died relatively young and was forgotten by mainstream Hollywood, a relic of a past uninteresting to all but the most diehard of film buffs. I’m getting vibes of “The Lucky One,”  (and “Nothing New”) both in themes and in storytelling. So, watch it be completely different and not a story about Clara Bow but instead just have it be an off-hand line lol.

BONUS TRACKS

The Manuscript: I’m veeeeeery intrigued by this one. (I know I say that about all of them. That’s because they all intrigue me.) I love the idea that this wraps up the “standard” album; the chair(wo)man of the Tortured Poets Department has submitted her thesis for review, and it’s up to the board to draw their conclusion. OR: the idea that this is the unfiltered submission to a publisher, before the editor’s review that will cut and tighten and ultimately make it better, but loses the author’s initial vision in the process. (Like self-editing to share the most palatable story to your reader. Which… Also gives Dear Reader/Midnights in general vibes.) OR EVEN: this is the author’s story, submitted to the audience for their review, leaving it up to them to draw their conclusions and annotate. There are sooooooo many ways I can see this going. 

The Bolter: A curious one indeed! I feel like of all of the bonus tracks at least, this is the one I have the least idea about. My immediate guess is that it refers to a person who runs, which would have all kinds of implications. Running from the law (unlikely lol), running from commitment, running from conflict… running for your life. Like running from commitment because you’re scared of being tied down (single girl version) to running from commitment because you’re scared of being tied down (bitter wife* version). (*NOT saying there was a secret wedding lol. I mean as in, that’s the future that was in store if one stayed.) I saw other takes saying bolter is also slang for jailer, which is also interesting with the Ready For It of it all. 

The Albatross: So much has been said about this one, so I don’t think I have much to ado about this one! The famous poem is rife with all kinds of allusions: the bird soaring on its own for up to six years, but being brought down by man’s cruelty. The bird looking majestic in the skies, but the burden of its wings dragging it down on land, slowly killing it. The story being a metaphor for how the very thing poets are exalted for in society are the things they are punished for personally. I think it’s safe to say this one is going to hurt regardless, whether it’s a reference to herself, to ***, or something else entirely.

The Black Dog: Also another one I’m not sure I have many thoughts on yet. The black dog being a metaphor for depression is likely the inspiration, and I’m assuming this has the potential to be one of the most vulnerable songs yet. I have a feeling most of this album will be, but the imagery of this — the black dog being a constant companion, wanted or not, casting a pall over its master’s every move — points in a pretty obvious direction. And one that is probably going to gut us.

Well there you have it folks! I am ready to be completely wrong!

[z0mbiefrank]

Transcript for Marina Toybina on the Designing Hollywood podcast

I've seen a couple people searching for a transcript of her discussing Gerard Way's stage costumes, so I have made one! Feel free to share/link as a resource. Popular quotes are bolded.

Link to source video. MCR's section starts around 22 minutes in.

The transcript is beneath the cut.

Interviewer: Well now you’ve just finished working with My Chemical Romance, which is a band that I dig. Gerard Way is also a comic book writer and artist, created the Umbrella Academy. So, first of all, how did you get that job? Because there’s a design, I mean the look of that band and what they like to do, what they’re influenced by, they’re not just your typical rock band. So what was it like? How did you get that job? You designed the whole tour right?

Marina: I Collaborated with the lead singer, yes, with Gerard. Uhm, okay everything kinda has it’s place in time. About 15 years ago, 15 to 20 years ago, I was a huge fan. I’m a rock girl at heart, and back then a lot of their music was like music to my soul. It got me through some of the harder times. A lot of my friends were musicians. I never saw them live, never could afford to get to their shows, but knew one day in my heart there probably will be an opportunity, they were in like my top 5 favorite bands. He was an artist I’ve always wanted to work with. This past summer, while I was designing So You Think You Can Dance, I just happened to turn on their music - nope- let me rewind I'm so sorry. So a year ago I was reading a release that they're coming back together on tour and they're playing LA on my birthday. I looked at my team and I was like "I'm gonna be at that show. We're gonna go to the show, we're all gonna go together." And I just jokingly said “I'll probably dress them!” A lot of things in my career have happened to manifestation, I'm a huge believer in that. I think my intentions were so clear into the universe. I believed in it so much. That happened a year ago. Then this past summer, I was driving to work, I was listening to their music and I just happened to text my agent. I'm like “You know I really want to get back into music. It's what I used to do. I used to do a lot of live performances. I used to do a lot of music videos. I need to feel that again, even though I'm surrounded with music all the time and I'm doing all these shows. But there was a disconnect in my career, to where it's like I love live entertainment.” And she’s like “Who do you want? Like are we going after pop stars?” And I'm like “No I've done all that. I want to go back to my roots. I want like Incubus or My Chemical Romance or Red Hot Chili Peppers. Get me back to rock and roll.” And she was like “Well, you know, they're touring, but it's probably… I don’t know, let's put it out there.” Then within two weeks I get an email from her like “Hey their managers want to meet with you, he wants to meet with you.” One of the biggest things about their aesthetic is one of my probably top three costume designers, Colleen Atwood, did their black parade album and it was so incredible. Back then, I was always a step behind. It's like they did The Black Parade and then I met the photographer later. Then I worked on a project with him. So it was always like some better-late-than-never I guess. And I'm like “I'm gonna work with her someday, I love her work. I've been told by many people we're a lot alike.” You know? And I'm like “Why not?” And so we get this email “He would like to take a meeting, see what we can do.” I never expected to do a tour, I just wanted to open this door of opportunity, to just collaborate, maybe do one thing together. And he just showed up in my studio and it was just an amazing artistic energy.

Interviewer: Were you starstruck?

Marina: I was trying to hold it together. I mean before they came in, I can't tell you how much I paced. Usually, there's like 15 - 20 people at my studio. This was the time and day that I was alone. I didn't know what to do. Of course, my expectations were just to present myself and see if I would be a good asset to them because I love their music and I love what he's about. Also, it’s not just the frontman for me, I think he's a brilliant artist. So there's a lot of things. I just wanted our worlds to merge somehow. Within the first five minutes of our conversation, I'm like “Oh I get his brain.” I told them my story. I told him that this is like 20 years in the making. You know, I probably sound like a crazy-fan costume designer. But we share ideas, he walked me through the concepts of things he wants to do on this particular tour and they haven't started doing the US leg of the tour. I didn't know if they had a designer. Then he did mention Colleen was doing something for him and I was like “Okay, how - can this be a triangle? You know? Can I come in in the picture?” It was just a beautiful collaboration. It was a genuine artist to artist conversation. Like “Let's do something interesting.” He walked me through his concepts, his ideas and I'm like “Alright well, let me come up with some creatives, see if we're on the same page.” Again, as much as I wanted to be like “Hey we're doing this tomorrow!” I also felt like it's important now in my career and possibly in his, to make sure the relationship is good, that this is the right artistic match to one another and… it worked! From there it was just amazing fittings, amazing collaboration and some iconic things that went viral!

Interviewer: I love hearing this from you because this is like the joyous experience of 'oh my god I dreamt of working with somebody and you finally get to do it'. But I want to take you back to that because I'm curious. How would that process even begin? You're working with somebody that you already know their music, you already know his vibe. And Colleen Atwood, who I've interviewed by the way, on the show, she's incredible. Our interview had to - she was in the middle of a work day, so it was only it was a short interview. But how does a collaboration like that work with somebody like Gerard Way? How do you guys start working together? How is that process?

Marina: For us, it was just like an initial conversation. I introduced myself, my work. They already did some background checking up to see where I stand, what my aesthetic was like. And I felt I was in a place in my life, in my career, where I was able to bring something new. That's where my confidence I think came from. At the same time I didn't want to change the artist that's in front of me. I think that's always so important for me when working with music. You're dealing with a fan base, and a reputation, an aesthetic approach that's far beyond any artistic reach of anybody new coming in. So for me it was having a conversation, understanding what characters he wanted to bring forward. This was a very playful tour. This wasn't about dressing up the whole band. This was about him being in this world of iconic characters. And how can we bring this to life? What can we do that's still very recognizable to his fans but at the same time a little bit of a shock value? But at the same time, I wanted him to be him, you know? He was in this beautiful place in his life and career where he felt great and felt confident and I just wanted to uplift that. We did our creative decks, went through the conversations of which characters we wanted to go with, these are the shows that he had. I knew which city, we kind of wanted to play off where was the right time. Halloween was right around the corner, what do we do? So it was like very strategic conversations but at the same time so much room to play and be creative. So I just gathered the top 10 characters that we had discussed and kind of started doing my own thing, and keeping him and the music in mind. Had an amazing fitting. I've never worked with an artist that's so clear. It was not just directional and very precise and very distinct on his own style, but it was clear for me when we were doing fittings, this is somebody that knows his body. This is somebody who knows his aesthetic on stage. This is somebody that knows how they're going to perform. So it just made it so much easier for me to be able to fall into his world and do the fittings like “Is this going to come off? Is this piece staying on? Are we going to do options? Is the character going to evolve on stage? Is the character going to come down on stage?” So all those conversations happen in our fittings and then I just packed it all up, with distinct notes, send them off, and then kept checking in, making sure everything was okay.

Interviewer: So when you had a direction for the characters, were you doing sketches first?

Marina: No, not at all. This was something that I felt like needed to have the research. It wasn't just about designing something on paper. When he mentioned to me “I wanted to be a vintage cheerleader” I'm like “Okay, what era are we in? 50’s, 60’s, 70’s, 40’s?” and then he was like “Find me something that's within possibly this color scheme.” The image that went viral when he did wear the cheer uniform, it was probably like 10 different vintage stores that we went to. And I'm like “Okay everything's size zero.” or like “What am I gonna do? This stuff doesn't exist anymore. If I get it from Etsy it's not going to come in time.” There's like so much and it happened to be as we were leaving one of the stores I looked on a sale rack and I saw this damaged, weird, vintage cheer dress that had no zipper, that had no hem. And I was like “I love this! I love this because I can reconstruct it. I can go and get the fabrics that we need to still keep it original and authentic. And that's how we start working. I build out a mannequin his size at my studio, put it on, we reshaped it, took the whole thing apart, reconstructed it to be his measurements, and still kept it authentic. After he wore it, the pattern for the actual thing was sold out. Fans loved it so much that we were getting notifications that people actually found the original pattern of this 1940s uniform and were buying it out.

Interviewer: That's crazy, okay!

Marina: Oh it's amazing! I think, to me, that's when things are just meant to be. When not only did my work translate into something beautiful on stage, but then he becomes this incredible persona on stage that then delivers the character and plays it off. We did that throughout every single look. Every single look when it became a fan favorite or craze.

Interviewer: In terms of time, what was the process when you first got the gig and then to the first show that was performing using your work? What was the time frame?

Marina: I think I had about a month to get it all together.

Interviewer: Wow! That’s not much!

Marina: Yeh and at the same time, I had another huge project in the works so it was going back and forth. But I could not tell you, I've had difficult projects in the past, I've had difficult times with artists, or finding our own language, or how to execute some things. This was so easy that time didn't matter to me. It was such a great collaboration, it flowed, like Bruce Lee would say, like water. It just made sense and no matter how difficult my other project was or what was going on at the same time, it was like oh this is the universe showing me this is how it's supposed to be. This is what's inspiring me. And at the end of the day, the one thing I told Gerard was “You made me fall in love with music again. You came into my life as an artist that I've admired and wanted to work with for almost 20 years. There was a big part of my beginning that made me look back at this now and be like “Oh that's what. That was that feeling that I had when I was 16 or 20.”

[chcrryade]

  ⠀ര ( ˶°ㅁ°)⠀UNWRAP...⠀DOUBLE DIP! ⠀01082021⠀❘❙❚❙

Saccharin, a sound that suited the hot summer it was released in, and a colour scheme so bright it could make your eyes water, ‘DOUBLE DIP’ was simultaneously all and none of what the masses were expecting from CHERRYADE. Released on the 1st of August 2021 (digitally, that was, with physical versions only becoming available a few days later on the 5th), most look back on CHERRYADE’s debut mini album and consider it a success; remembered through smoke clouds, artificial flavouring, and a surprising lack of infighting allegations, as well as JAGUAR CEO Ae Seungdae’s reassurance through a short interview held a week before release that it would “leave a sweet aftertaste in the mouths of all who listen”—even if creative director Choi Eunhee seemed to disagree, if the hastily-covered scoff that left her lips was any indication.

⠀ᝪ  .ᐟ⠀⠀▬ ▬ ▬⠀⠀the  stats

RELEASED⠀01 & 05 / 08 / 2021

PROMOTIONAL PERIOD⠀5 WEEKS

UNITS SOLD⠀990K

WINS⠀3

⠀ᝪ  .ᐟ⠀⠀▬ ▬ ▬⠀⠀the  tracks

FUN⠀LEAD⠀WRITTEN 도연 & 대진 PROD. 대진

DANCE!⠀WRITTEN 해일 & 주순 PROD. 대진

FLAVOUR⠀PROMOTED B-SIDE⠀WRITTEN 하선 & 잘렌 PROD. 주순

SUMMER NIGHT⠀WRITTEN 잘렌 & 대진 PROD. 대진

ALL DAY⠀WRITTEN 宜君 & 잘렌 PROD. 주순

FlipSide⠀⸻⠀the  following  overviews  have  been  outsourced  from  various  netizens.  general  consensus:  ★★★★☆

ഒ⠀from  user  haeilade⠀06082021

so what did this sort-of-anticipated debut consist of, I hear you asking? well, first up is ‘Fun,’ a pretty straightforward anthem about enjoying some time in the sun to the fullest, and the track I expect will be the most performed on the various music shows the group are set to be appearing on in the coming weeks. next up is ‘DANCE!’—a song that seems to be becoming a fan-favourite b-side, in which they compare the feeling of falling in love to dancing, to flashing and falling lights, to a very summery feeling in general. it makes you want to get up and do exactly as the title tells you, and I can see why it’s climbing the ranks in the favourites department. third on the mini album comes a slight mood shift in the form of ‘Flavour,’ a bouncy and enjoyable experience no doubt hiding a number of sex innuendos in the form of the many food-and-drink-related lyrics (I mean, what are we letting ‘swell up a bit more,’ boys?), and what I predict to be the companion performance song, along with ‘Fun.’

second-to-last is ‘Summer Night,’ an upbeat affair speaking of dreams, of flying, of coaxing the listener to ‘have some fun,’ and and, on a less upbeat (but very brief) moment in the bridge, their fear of those aforementioned dreams ‘disappearing.’ and, last but not least, we have an even more noticeable shift in both mood and in tone, a much more direct attempt at a sensual (but still very enjoyable) anthem: ‘All Day.’ it doesn’t take a genius to guess at what they’re referring to. still, the delightful performances of the group and somewhat addictive whistling built into the instrumental makes it just as loveable as any of the others—in fact, it’s my personal favourite from the project as a whole, followed by ‘Flavour’ and ‘Fun,’ and I hope we’ll get a peek into the behind-the-scenes for it (and, really, all of the mini album as whole). credits-wise, all members bar gogo and jaehee contributed with lyrics, but personally I wouldn’t have cared if none of them put a pen to paper anyway.

ഒ⠀from  user  letsgogo⠀23082021

I’ve seen many people questioning the sudden flip in mood song-wise at the very end of the mini album, but as it usually is with JAGUAR, very little of those queries were answered. some have been calling it poorly structured and lacking in consistency, but some have thought up a theory for themselves (and whether they’re onto something or are just trying to make excuses to comfort themselves, at this point it’s a case of only time being able to tell)—that the change was intentional. that ‘All Day’ was setting the foundations for their next release, sort of like leaving a story on a cliffhanger; in order to get listeners intrigued enough to stick around a while longer for whatever may happen afterwards. but even if it isn’t, most of us are just happy to take it as it is, not minding the differing energy one bit—undoubtedly a positive.

another one of those was how well the seven look like they’re getting along. seeing as they’ve been stitched together from the members of past failed groups (and hand-picked from the companies those groups had been under), a large majority of people were eagerly awaiting their non-music related content (interviews, behinds, general extra things) to try and get a gauge of how they were getting along—because put-on acts of professionalism can really only work so well before someone or other starts to see through them. however, despite how hard many have been looking, not much has been found. there has been, of course, notable tension between yijun and jaehee (which hasn’t been so much of a surprise to anyone, considering their past), but the rest all seemed fine. friendly, even, if I dared to go that far. shocker!

ഒ⠀from  user  jaleon⠀25082021

past all of the apparent amicability between them, though, this debut era hasn’t been without its downs. first came the standard smoking allegations, grainy photos showcasing the smoke clouds leaking from their mouths or noses as one or two of the group huddled together round the back of the building after dark, laughing while caught up in whatever conversation they were having as they did so. longtime fans of most JAGUAR groups haven’t been deterred at all by this—most of them are just.. used to it. a nicotine addiction on the side has almost been written into the company’s contract at that point—and so these didn’t haven’t made much noise. some saw it as another good thing, if anything—they liked one another enough to hang out outside of work, so it must’ve been a positive.

there has been, however, a more serious issue that arose out of this promotional period. shortly after their first appearance as a group on inkigayo, whispers began to generate, centralising around yijun and seven, a member of senior boy group S(O)UL. the story was that an argument went south backstage, and the two parted on less-than-good terms. neither company has made any move to address it, though, and so the rumours are starting to die down—even if I doubt the feud will, and not for a while at that. I’ve heard similar whispers of mutual dirty looks also being exchanged between him and a member of group MELIORA, but even less has been said about that, so I know as much as everyone else does—pretty much nothing.

ഒ⠀from  user  hasunshine⠀06092021

styling (the outfits, as you’ll probably come to learn, are really only ever I want to talk about) this era was exactly as you’d expect something named ‘DOUBLE DIP’ to be. outlandish, bodacious, overly colourful, and with so many accessories plastered all over them it was a surprise all of their vocals during performances weren’t interrupted by the jingling and jangling of their jewellery. clunky rings, bedazzled sunglasses (and faces, and shoes, and hair.. bedazzled everything), fur hats and big caps and denim on leather on denim. you sort of just have to imagine someone’s thrown everything they can find in a vaguely-2000s second-hand store at them, and then said ‘break a leg!’—but, to their credit, they pull it off pretty well. maybe it’s just their faces.

and after that, we’ve reached the end of all I was ever intending to cover within CHERRYADE’s debut era. all that was bad brought in as much attention as any one of their performances (quite fitting with JAGUAR’s age-old motto of “all press is good press”), and overall it was very successful for the seven. I hope it’s just one of the (maybe) many more fruitful eras to come.

(¬_¬) ⠀at  a  glance  ⠀𝄂𝄂𝄀𝄁𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄃⠀  doubledip.jpg ⠀(  OO3  )

[nattinatalia]

Jack Harlow x Reader : NEW BEGINNINGS.

A/N : I don’t usually stay up to date with the timelines. I don’t use events that either already happened or are about to happen in order. *MIA IS THE ONLY CHILD AS OF NOW IN THIS TIMELINE*

You had woken up at the crack of dawn to drop Mia off at her grandparents. Maggie was going on a trip and she kindly asked if she could take Mia with her.

It was going to be a little four day trip but lucky enough, her work trip was for one day and it was near Disneyland, so she thought it’ll be nice to have a Mia and grandma trip.

You and Jack weren’t that worried since it wasn’t the first nor will it be the last time Maggie will take your daughter on a trip. She’s a wonderful mother in law and an even better Nona to Mia.

You were pulling up to your driveway when you got a notification on your phone. Once you were parked, you shut off the car and grabbed your phone.

Nothing could have prepared you for what you were about to see.

“What the-?” You gasp out.

“He did not.” You turn off your phone, get out of your car and make your way inside your home.

“YOU SNEAKY LITTLE SHIT.” You yell out.

You hear his laugh coming from the kitchen, so you stomp your way towards it.

You see your husband scrambling some eggs, “I’m guessing you saw?” He smiles, lifting his eyebrows.

You nod. “How?”

“What do you mean how? I’ve been going to the studio?”

“Yes I know, but you never told me this year. You just said for your upcoming album. It never crossed my mind that it’ll be this soon.” You walk up to him.

“So what do you think?” He sets down the bowl on the counter, and places his hands around your waist.

“I haven’t heard it.” You look at him confused, “Your post says Friday.”

He smiles, “I meant the cover and how it looks.”

“Ohhh that.” You slide your hands under his black shirt.

“Oh that?” He’s sounds worried. “You don’t like it?.”

“You showed people my nippples.”

He chuckles at that. “Your nipples?”

You nod, looking at him. “Yeah, my nipples.”

You smile. “I think it’s giving Gazebo and Confetti vibes. I love all your albums and I don’t like to compare them, you know this. But the moment I saw it, I know you’re about to talk your shit.”

“Oh really? Hmm.”

You flick one of his nipples. “You look hot, is that what you wanted to hear?”

“No?” He answers, smirking.

You knew exactly that’s what he wanted to hear, he has a hard time taking compliments, but he welcomes them especially if they come from you.

“Bubs, you don’t even know the thoughts that crossed my mind once I saw your post.” You take out your hands from under his shirt. “And not just over the cover, that’s just the cherry on top.”

“You’re a hard worker, you never stop. You have a movie coming out next month, you are already working on a new one. On top of that, you’ve been working on an album that’s coming out in two days? I’m proud of you.”

He squeezes your waist. “Do you think the fans will like it?”

“I haven’t even heard it and I know for a fact I’m going to love it, so they’ll love it too.”

“You’re my wife, you have to say that.” He smiles.

“Uh no, as your wife I’m allowed to tell you how it is. But I really do think this is going to be one of your best.”

“You really think so?”

You nod, smile and close your eyes. “Do you smell that?.”

“Smell what?”

“It smells like a Grammy to me.” You open your eyes and look at him.

“Babe.” His cheeks are a little pink, he’s smiling. “You’re the best.”

“On another note.” You pull back. “Can I see the track list?”

“No, it’s a surprise.”

“Can I know who’s in it?”

“That’s also a surprise.” He turns around to put butter on the pan.

“Is there a song about me?” You ask jokingly.

“Isn’t there always?” He turns around, smirking and winking at you.

“BABE!” You wrap your hands around his waist, your chest to his back. “Please tell me.”

“No, you’ll listen to it at the party.”

“Come on, don’t I get wife privileges?” Your hand goes inside his gray sweats, “I’ll give you head?” You tease his tip.

He groans. “Just head?”

“Mmm, No.” You feel him get harder against your hand.

“Maybe we can get started on baby number two?” You tell him nervously. You know how much he’s been wanting to get you pregnant again.

Mia was already three, and growing by the second. If it were up to him you would be pregnant every other year- which he’s a bit crazy in the head but that’s your man- He didn’t want to pressure you though, and you loved that about him.

“Wait? Seriously?” He shuts off the stove and turns around to look at you.

“Yeah, I think it’s time. I think we’re ready.” You smile.

“You know I already synced the album to your playlist right, so you don’t have to say that.”

“Baby, I know.” You reassure him.

He smiles and claps his hands. “We’re not leaving the house today.” He picks you up and throws you over his shoulder and starts walking towards your shared bedroom.

“Jackman, you better not drop me.” That gets you a loud and hard smack to your ass.

As soon as you’re inside your bedroom, he tosses you on your bed.

“What are you doing?” He heads to your vanity.

“Want to listen to the album while I put my baby inside you?” He turns around to wink at you.

“JACKMAN, BRING THAT DICK TO ME NOW.”

“Is that a yes?” He’s smirking and loving every bit of this. He’s about to drop a new album and if he was lucky, by the end of the year you’ll be pregnant with the second Baby Harlow.

Life was good and he was going to cherish every single second of it.

The world wasn’t ready for this new Jack.

•

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[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

I feel like this conversation is a bit played out, but I’m curious: do you think JK’s banking on winning a Grammy and potentially getting out of his military service? I’ve tried to take their words for what they are and I know everyone’s said that they’re all going to the military, will be back in 2025, yadda yadda, whatever. I can’t understand why, if that’s the case, they’re banking so much on his solo career if he’s just going to disappear from the scene (physically) for almost 2 years. Do you get what I mean?

My thoughts are that they are actually hoping for a Grammy and subsequent deferment of mandatory service, but then again, nobody knows so I guess we’ll have to wait and see how it all plays out.

As this is only speculation and might as well not happen, let me bring my own contribution. I don't think this is about Jungkook and I'll explain why.

If you look at this entire issue from the perspective of the artist/idol, you'll realize soon that you're stuck, that you can't explain why he's doing this or that. But looking at it as a business deal will shine another light on it.

Yes, Jungkook is leaving to do his military service soon and everything he said up until now points to that so why are they investing so much into making him a "global pop star"? Because Hybe and Hybe America need to show that they can do that. That their strategy is one that works for future business. Why do you think they tried it first on the most versatile of the BTS members, the one that can do any song because he has the voice needed for that? This wouldn't have worked with Taehyung or Jimin. God, I'm so happy it didn't work with Jimin because it would have been horrible to see all that unfoulding. Besides, they had projects on their own and without making any contribution to the song writing, Tae's album was still something that matched his personality, it was him with the help of MHJ.

With Jungkook, the situation is different. I wouldn't know the details, but when they announced their hiatus, it looked like everyone was set on releasing an album, including JK. And then, most likely, life happened. Because you can't plan your state of mind. And when you're under a contract, you do need to listen to other people. I know army always uses the shares in Hybe argument, but the value allocated for the members is insignificant on a larger scale. Yes, they are rich and they can do what they want and sleep on a wlive, but I don't think for one second the company would have let Jungkook do nothing and be a couch potato.

So they found this opportunity. You also have to keep in mind that Hybe paid a lot of money for Scooter's company and then what happened to him? Most of his artists left? So where is this big opportunity for collaboration and projects and all that?

This is just business. That's it. They chose the idol capable of being a blank slate and stuck the concept of global pop star on him. Because that's what it is which is incredibly funny (not). Usually that accolade comes after some time, when the results can be seen over a prolonged period of time, but in this case, that was the starting point. As much as Bang wants to get rid of the k in kpop, they're still using a kpop strategy, that of making an album based on a concept or creating a specific image for an idol.

And now they are pushing it hard. They are investing a ton of money into this in a way that makes them look desperate and I think that in the industry at large, people see it. Not the fans because they either choose to turn a blind eye or their mind doesn't go that far. There are voices which have said a thing or two lately among army, but it's an insignificant minority. The company can rely on the fandom to buy all those 284836521 versions and remixes and they will eat it up. And voila, look at how Hybe produced a global pop star in less than half a year. Quick, open the catalog for some songs that sound mediocre enough for a top 40, make the singer record them asap, fast, done in less than one week. Quickly come up with some generic argument of how this is just to show the artist's vocal range (good job PR for that one, jesus) and then also openly admit that it was made for a Western market, aka US cause the world stops there.

Jungkook had the possibility to show more personality of his own when he was with a group of six other people than with his solo album, which is so ironic. But that is because it is not his album. He's merely a vessel through which Bang and Scooter can show investors that they can invent a global pop star and fast while their pockets grow bigger and bigger.

[icyminghao]

hello 💗💗 i love your fics so much

if you are taking requests now can i request boynextdoor as your bf's meeting your parents for the first time? thank you 😊

boynextdoor meeting your parents for the first time

pairing: boynextdoor (ot6) x gn!reader genre: fluff, crack (a little)

note for anon: thank you so much! hope you like it hehe

JAEHYUN

nervous puppy

would not stop asking you what your parents like to talk about on the way there (you entertain him though, he listens to what you have to say about your parents so attentively it does things to your heart)

you lowkey have to drag him to your parents’ front porch bc he’s having second thoughts as soon as you pull up on the driveway

your mom fawns over him, chattering about how “he’s so cute!” and “i’ve always wanted a son!” while jaehyun and your dad bond over his football knowledge (which your dad deems impressive, much to your endearment)

at the end of the day, jaehyun has charmed them so much you’d think you were the one visiting jaehyun’s parents with the way they’re so reluctant to let him go home with you

“You know, your dad has never been like this with any of the boys you’ve brought home before,” your mom sighs in bliss as the two of you stand by the kitchen, watching Jaehyun and your dad chat animatedly about football.

“Well, I guess he’s just really excited to have someone to geek out over football with,” you chuckle in reply, smiling in endearment at the two favourite men in your life bonding in front of your eyes.

“I think it’s more than that,” your mom speaks up, taking your hands in hers, “we’ve seen the way he looks at you, dear, he’s a real keeper.”

You choke on a breath. “Oh, mom, why are you getting sappy on me?”

“It’s true!” your mom breaks out into a small laugh, smoothing over your hair. “He must really love you a lot, to be coming all the way here and entertaining your old man. Take care of him, yeah?”

SUNGHO

don’t be deceived by the brave front he’s putting on, because as soon as you look away he’s on the verge of crumbling and folding in half at the stress

what if your parents don’t like him? he really doesn’t want to mess things up because he knows how much this means to you, and to your relationship

your warm hand on his thigh as he drives to your parents’ place soothes him just a little, overthinking the multitude of ways things can go wrong on the way there

once your parents open the door though, all his worries fade away

your parents are absolutely smitten with him

your mom fell in love with him as soon as she laid eyes on him (the face card truly does wonders!), though your dad needed some convincing before he grunted and reached out his hand for a handshake (he’s just sappy that he’s not the only man in your life anymore)

the dinner goes by smoothly, and sungho feels right at home as your parents treat him like one of their own!

“Let me help you with the dishes, sweetheart,” Sungho walks over to stand beside you as you scrub one of the many plates with dishwashing soap.

“It’s okay, dearie, you should go outside and entertain my mom. She’s quite the talkative one,” you reply, smiling at him with your eyes and nudging his shoulder to signal to him to go outside.

“Sungho? Come here, I got y/n’s old photo albums, you’ll love this!” your mom’s voice travels from the living room and into the kitchen, and you groan.

Sungho simply chuckles and tells your mom that he’d “be right over”. He rests a hand on your waist and squeezes the skin there, giving you a fond look that says “I’ll see you” in his dictionary before leaving to look at the treasure your mom brought in.

RIWOO

another nervous bf

he usually prefers to steer clear of social interaction, but this is for you, so he makes the effort to step out of his comfort zone to interact with the two other favourite people in your life

has to psych himself up constantly as the two of you approach your parents' place, holding onto your hand for comfort

all his worries go down the drain as he meets your parents, because they make him feel right at home immediately

he's practically their son at the end of the day, with your mom cooing over you and your dad nodding at you in acknowledgement

"Hey," Riwoo greets, taking a seat beside you on the couch. He had been helping your mom out in the kitchen after dinner, insisting to wash the dishes.

"Hey yourself," you nudge his arm, smiling. "How was today? You know, you're practically one of us now, with how Mom is absolutely smitten with you."

Riwoo lets out a soft smile. "I'm glad."

"That's a step closer to getting their approval to marry you, isn't it?"

TAESAN

he was born for this

he’s ready with a white button-down and navy blue slacks, a bouquet in hand for your mom (which you complain about in mock jealousy, bc he rarely ever goes all out for you)

his confidence falters a little once you reach your parents’ front porch, and you can see him start to doubt himself

you take his hand in yours and squeeze his hand reassuringly, reminding him that he has nothing to worry about

and he indeed doesn’t have anything to worry about, because his excellent social skills and ability to just know what to say everytime flatters both your mom and dad, much to your surprise

the day ends with your parents being completely won over by taesan, impressing you to no end

“Oh, come in, Taesan! y/n has told us so much about you, I’ve been waiting for you to come over,” your mom drags Taesan into the house as soon as the door swings open, leaving you behind with you dad as the both of you watch them leave.

“He doesn’t look half bad,” your dad acknowledges, stepping aside for you to come in.

Your mom talks Taesan’s ear off as he sits good-naturedly on the couch, the bouquet of flowers he brought resting on the coffee table, and you look on with a huge smile on your face.

“Mom, do you need help with preparing dinner?” you ask as an attempt to save Taesan from your mom’s never-ending talkativeness. Your mom lets out a surprised ‘oh!’, instructing you to stay put as she goes into the kitchen to resume preparing for dinner.

“She never runs out of things to ask you, huh?” you chuckle, taking a seat beside him on the couch.

Taesan suppresses a laugh. “Yeah. I was surprised, honestly, given how much you’ve already told her and your dad,”

LEEHAN

is excited and terrified at the same time

he’s excited to meet your parents, the very reason why you exist, and he’s terrified that they wouldn’t like him

he doesn’t show it though, but you can tell from how he starts breaking out into a cold sweat and starts tapping his foot on the way there

you take his hand in yours and squeeze it, and it calms him down a little

it takes a little convincing, but he makes it to your parents’ front porch with an uneasy smile plastered on his face

which turns into a genuine one as soon as your parents welcome him into the house warmly, making him feel right at home

the day ends with leehan’s heart (and stomach) full with love from your family, and he can’t wait to see them again

"So," you clasp your hands together and turn to look at Leehan once the both of you are in the car, "how was today? My parents didn't scare you off... right?"

Leehan breaks out into laughter, giving you the cutest eye smile you've ever seen. "No, of course not, baby. I loved today, your parents were really cool!"

"Really? I'm cooler though, right?" you smile giddily, reaching out to hold his hand.

Leehan taps his finger on his chin, pretending to think. "Hmm, I'll have to think about that one, actually."

"Hey!" you raise your voice in mock anger, and the two of you break out into laughter at the same time, leaning towards each other as you laugh.

"I'm kidding, I love you, yeah?" Leehan rests his forehead on yours, smiling brightly. "Let's go home."

WOONHAK

someone help this poor boy out he’s so nervous T-T

he’d be dreading it so bad the whole way there

it has nothing to do with you or your parents, of course, he’s just worried he wouldn’t be able to meet your parents’ expectations (you really weren’t helping when you recounted horror stories of how strict they were about who you were dating)

it would take some convincing and many kisses (+ promises to cuddle as soon as you get home) for him to finally get out of the car and onto your parents’ front porch

honestly he really had nothing to worry about, he doesn’t even have to do anything, just stand there with that goofy smile of his and your mom is sold

even your dad, who’s known to be extremely hard on whoever you bring home, gets along swimmingly with woonhak during the dinner (he even invites woonhak to come back again sometime, which shocks both you and your mom)

“Come on, mom, we have to go! Woonhak has an early day tomorrow,” you whine, pulling Woonhak towards the door, much to your parents’ dismay.

“Oh, y/n, it’s still early! I wanted to watch the Lakers game with Woonhak,” your dad cuts in, sounding so disappointed you coo on the inside.

“Mom, dad, can you at least act like you don’t want me to leave? You’re acting like Woonhak is your son at this point,” you complain jokingly, closing the front door and leading Woonhak to the living room.

“Well, we certainly don’t mind you guys getting married sooner if it means more opportunities to bond like this,” your dad makes an out-of-pocket comment, and your eyes widen.

You open your mouth to retort, but Woonhak takes your hand in his, beating you to it, “We’ll take that into consideration!”

a/n: this is probably not my best work i tried my best not to be repetitive i hope it's not really bad ><

masterlist

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael Before Midnight: "Houdini" by Eminem

Eminem is one of the most controversial rappers of all time, and this reputation isn’t entirely undeserved. I mean, the man has an entire song that’s just six straight minutes of him acting out violently murdering his ex. Uncontroversial artists do not make songs like that. But I think people do give him a lot of shit and really try to underplay his genuine talent too, mainly because of how a lot of his work just hasn’t aged great.

You have to understand the time and place Em rose out of. The 90s was all about being nasty and politically incorrect, and the rap scene reflected that. The rise of gangster rap had guys talking about how cool the thug life was, and there were all sorts of vulgar tunes being cranked out (“Pregnant Pussy” is from the 90s, if that tells you anything). As a white boy in a cutthroat industry where black men are the kings being taken under the wing of the man who produced “Fuck tha Police,” Marshall Mathers really wasn’t gonna do anything other than assimilate into the culture of the time to survive. And it worked; he’s pretty much the only white rapper besides maybe the Beastie Boys who has kept a long and generally well-liked career. He played by the rules, made sure to acknowledge his place, kept his ego in check outside his songs, collaborated with the right people, and boom! Rap has its token white boy.

But the edgy violent white boy schtick that made Slim Shady so funny and… “endearing” back in the day is not really something people like in 2024. Since the 90s, edgy white boys like the Slim character have shot up schools, sexually assaulted women and gotten away with it, openly supported fascism, and whined about queer people and black people being in Star Wars. No one fucking likes a Slim because they’ve been ruining our world for a while now, so this character who was once a beloved aspect of Em’s career just doesn’t sit right with the people of today. Add onto the fact that he’s a middle aged man, and he can’t just be doing the same crap all these years later without looking like the cringiest man alive, a rapping Elon Musk. With all that, and the fact his upcoming album is called The Death of Slim Shady, you’d think maybe he’d drop a single to showcase how he’s evolved over his career, how his sobriety and fatherhood have changed him, and how the Slim persona is well and truly in the past.

Instead he released “Houdini.”

For better or for worse, this is a return to that classic late 90s/early 2000s Slim style, with everything that implies. Get ready for lots of references, offensive jokes, and more, cuz I’m going line by line to talk about the content of Slim Shady’s final comeback. And while I am going to analyze some of the lamer and more questionable jokes, I want to make it clear that I understand the Slim character is satirical and whatever. I'm not fucking dumb, and I've been listening to Eminem for 24 years now. Being satire is not an excuse to be unfunny.

After an ominous skit where Em’s manager Paul Rosenberg tells him he’s own his own for this album, we have an intro to kick the song off:

Guess who’s back, back again? Shady’s back, tell a friend Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? (Da-da-da, da, da, da, da, da, da) (Da-da-da, da, da, da, da)

As should be obvious to anyone with a passing knowledge of Eminem, this is a reuse of the intro of his classic “Without Me.” This is a double-edged sword; on the one hand, it is a fun little callback to his earlier career and helps once more establish that he’s bringing it like he did back then. But on the other hand, you’re reminding the audience of one of your best songs right off off the bat, so if this one doesn’t live up to that, you’re in for a world of hurt.

Now’s also a good time to mention that the song heavily samples “Abracadabra” by the Steve Miller Band. From what I’ve gathered, a lot of people find that song unbelievably corny… but that’s why I love it. And I mean, the song’s called “Houdini,” so why not sample the massive smash hit song that’s named after the famous magic words? Again, for me at least, sampling a song I already love means you’re gonna have to really kick it into high gear to make me want to listen to yours over what you’re sampling. There’s about a million songs that sample “When the Levee Breaks,” but how many of those do you think I’m putting on over Led Zeppelin, y’know?

Well, look what the stork brung (What?) Little baby devil with the forked tongue And it's stickin' out, yeah, like a sore thumb (Bleh) With a forehead that it grew horns from (Look) Still a white jerk (It's him), pullin' up in a Chrysler to the cypher With the Vics, Percs and a Bud Light shirt Lyrical technician (Yeah), an electrician (Yeah) Y'all light work (Haha) And I don't gotta play pretend, it's you I make believe (What?) And you know I'm here to stay 'cause me (Why?) If I was to ever take a leave (What?) It would be aspirin' to break a feve' (Yeah)

So far it’s been pretty solid. It’s pretty clear Em’s still got it, great flow, delivery, subtle nods to his past work, boasts about his skills, talking about how he started from the bottom… It’s nothing really groundbreaking, but it’s at least continuing the idea that Slim is back, baby! I sure hope he doesn’t derail his momentum in the next couple of lines with a stupid, cringeworthy jab at a woman who literally never did anything to him!

If I was to ask for Megan Thee (What?) Stallion if she would collab with me Would I really have a shot at a feat? (Haha) I don't know, but I'm glad to be back like

So a little context here, for those not in the know: In 2022, rapper Megan Thee Stallion accused fellow rapper Tory Lanez of shooting at her feet and saying, “Dance, bitch, dance” like he’s a comic book mobster. The case was taken to court, where Lanez was found guilty and then sentenced to up to 22 years in jail. Now, the two have shouted out each other before—Em interpolataed the hook of Megan’s song “Body” in 2021’s “Killer (Remix),” while Megan referenced “The Real Slim Shady” on her feature on Lil Nas X’s “DOLLA SIN SLIME”--but I’m not really sure the two are close to the point where it’s cool for Em to jokingly reference the time some psychopath acted like a Batman villain to her. The fact Megan’s 2024 diss track “Hiss” referenced Mariah Carey’s “Obsessed,” which was about Eminem, does make me side-eye this bar.

But hey, one corny, cringey joke is whatever. Let’s see how the rest of the song goes:

Abra-abracadabra (And for my last trick) I'm 'bout to reach in my bag, bruh (Like) Abra-abracadabra (And for my last trick, poof) Just like that and I'm back, bro

So this is the chorus, and I have to say it’s incredibly lazy and boring. It’s just an Eminem-themed parody of the original chorus, and it’s not especially interesting. That being said, by token of being a chorus of a song I already like just with lyrical alterations, I don’t think it’s bad either. I just expect a little more cleverness from Eminem.

Now, back in the days of old me (When?) Right around the time I became a dope fiend (Oh) Ate some codeine as a way of coping (Mm) Taste of opiates, case of O.E. Turned me into smiley face emoji (Woo)

Here, now we’re back on track! Em is reflecting on his old self and talking about his drug-addled early career! Surely he’ll stay the course here and dig deep into his manic persona that was partly created by his addictions, and not veer off into alt-right talking points and child abuse jokes!

My shit may not be age-appropriate But I will hit an eight-year-old in the face with a participation trophy 'Cause I have zero doubts That this whole world's 'bout To turn into some girl scouts That censorship bureau's out to (Shut me down) So when I started this verse It did start off lighthearted at first (Hmm) But it feels like I'm targeted

Hoo boy, we’re whining about how “sensitive” the world is becoming and how censorship is coming to get you! Eminem is going full boomer now. But hey, maybe he has a point! You can’t sing songs where you violently murder the mother of your child and then abduct said child anymore, because of woke. You can’t rap about mass shootings right after they happen either, also because of woke. Whatever, grandpa. Let’s see if you have anything of actual substance.

Mind-bogglin' how my profit has skyrocketed Look what I pocketed Yeah, the shit is just like y'all had been light joggin', and I've been runnin' at full speed And that's why I'm ahead like my noggin', and I'm the fight y'all get in When you debate who the best, but opps, I'm white chalkin' when I step up to that mic, cock it then "Oh my God, it's him! Not again!"

Just some pre-chorus boasting topped off with a throwback to his song “As the World Turns.” It doesn’t completely erase the bad taste of his whiny boomerisms out of your mouth, but it’s at least something.

Sometimes, I wonder what the old me'd say (If what?) If he could see the way shit is today (Look at this shit, man) He'd probably say that everything is gay (Like happy) What's my name? What's my name? (Slim Shady)

Em’s had a long, troubled reputation with queerness. He came under a lot of fire for homophobia back in the day, but then his friendship with Elton John happened. There’s also his brief appearance in the Seth Rogen movie The Interview, where he plays himself as a closeted gay man. Even still, he’s often used queerness as jokes in his songs, mainly as an attempt to emasculate his opponents (something he even did to an actual queer rapper, Tyler the Creator). As a bisexual man myself, I do find it tasteless in general, but in the context of this song I thing it’s ok. Like yeah, the homophobic crackhead Slim Shady persona would call the world we live in gay. The line still feels a little weird, though; is the Slim persona actually singing this song, or is this Em reflecting on the Slim persona? It kind of muddies the water, and makes it hard to figure just how seriously we’re supposed to be taking everything here.

So how many little kids still wanna act like me? (Haha) I'm a bigger prick than cacti be (Yeah) And that's why these (What?) Words sting just like you were being attacked by bees (Bzz) In the coupe, leaning back my seat (What?) Bumpin' R. Kelly's favorite group (Uh), the black guy (Guy) pees (Pees, haha) In my Air Max 90s White Ts, walkin' parental advisory

Verse three starts off pretty good! The R. Kelly joke is extremely juvenile and crass, but that’s the sort of thing I enjoy from Slim. It may be low-hanging fruit, but that’s the fruit you wanna grab the most. Now what wacky sort of humor is Slim going to bring to this verse next? Surely he won’t make some incredibly stupid and corny joke that isn’t funny in the slightest and derails the whole song!

My transgender cat's Siamese (Why?) Identifies as black, but acts Chinese (Haha)

According to Genius, this line might actually be a reference to a Dave Chapelle bit from 2019’s Sticks & Stones. If that’s the case, I really don’t need to say much more. There’s no way to read this line in anything other than the worst possible light.

Like a motherfuckin' Hacky Sack, I treat (What?) The whole world 'cause I got it at my feet (Yeah) How can I explain to you (What?) That even myself I'm a danger to? (Yeah) I hop on tracks like a kangaroo And say a few things or two to anger you

So he does openly admit he says fucked up stuff to get a rise out of people. Going in to the song, I knew this. The guy’s a provocateur, it’s what he does, and the Slim persona has always been about being as flagrantly offensive as possible. But the thing is, even the stuff here I’m taking issue with doesn’t make me mad; I’m more disappointed than anything, really. Like he has to know that times have changed and people really aren’t all in on this sort of humor anymore, right? What is the point of bringing Slim back to a world that has evolved beyond him, even if to finally kill him off? If that’s what he wanted to do he could do it without trying to showcase the dated humor. This is the musical equivalent of watching an 80s sex comedy like Porky’s or Revenge of the Nerds. Like maybe it was funny way back when, but looking back at it through a modern lens it’s just really gross and unpleasant and full of terrible messages.

But fuck that, if I think that shit, I'ma say that shit Cancel me, what? Okay, that's it Go ahead, Paul, quit, snake-ass prick You male cross dresser (Haha), fake-ass bitch And I'll probably get shit for that (Watch) But you can all suck my dick, in fact Fuck them, fuck Dre, fuck Jimmy, fuck me, fuck you Fuck my own kids, they're brats (Fuck 'em) They can screw off (Yeah), them and you all (Uh) You too, Paul (Punk), got two balls Big as RuPaul's (Woah) What you thought you saw ain't what you saw (Nah) 'Cause you're never gon' see me Caught sleepin' and see the kidnappin' never did happen Like Sherri Papini, Harry Houdini I vanish into the thin air as I'm leavin' like

The rest of the final verse, save for another tired shot at cancel culture, is fine. I might even say it’s a bit funny; I like him taking at shot at Dre, himself, everyone he’s worked with, his own kids… That part is where it is really obvious the whole thing is tongue-in-cheek, because he is by all accounts a good and loving dad. Making fun of RuPaul and Papini are fine in my book too.

So I’ve been pretty critical of this song and rather unamused by a lot of its jokes. This must mean I hate it, right? Well… no. I can’t say I love it, but I really don’t think this is awful. Trust me, I’ve heard awful Eminem and this isn’t it. “Just Lose It” and “We Made You” are light years ahead of this song in terms of awfulness. On top of that, this is also the first single off of an album that’s all about killing Slim—I don’t really have the full context. For all I know, this could be part of an overarching concept of the album, Slim’s last ride before his inevitable death, and in that regard this is definitely a perfect modern take on the classic Slim Shady song, warts and all. We just live in a world where his kind of humor doesn’t age badly, it just ends up dead on arrival more often than not.

If nothing else, it still showcases Eminem has great flow, great wit, clever writing… and that’s what he should stick to instead of making tired, unfunny boomer jokes about cancel culture and queer people just to rile people up. Hopefully that’s what the rest of the album will be like when it drops. I doubt I’m going to review every single song on it since I’m no Todd in the Shadows and my musical knowledge is very casual, but maybe I’ll give my opinions. Until that time, though, I think I’ll just listen to “Venom” again.

[pizzaqueen]

38 for the spotify ficlet :)

This was “Johnny and Mary” by Robert Palmer

I guess I kind of cheated by having them listen to the song, but it was the only idea I came up with! XD

767 words / rated T / Could be read as pre-slash or established relationship

(Send me a number and I’ll write a fic!)

“What do you mean you don’t care about music?”

Steve shrugs. Maybe he should have expected this reaction from Eddie, but he wasn’t even thinking when he said it. It’s kind of funny to see Eddie riled up, though, so he’s glad he did. “Just what I said.”

“But you have to like music!”

“Of course I like music.” Steve folds his arms over his stomach. “I’m just not as into it as you are.”

“But… You have a favorite song, right? Or a favorite band?”

“I don’t know. I’ll listen to whatever.”

And, honest to god, Eddie looks crushed. And completely fucking baffled. Steve almost feels bad, but it’s cute. “I don’t…” Eddie Munson, at a loss for words—not something Steve thought he’d ever see. “But…”

Eddie looks around the room, and then his eyes light up. He tumbles off Steve’s bed and grabs one of the cassettes sitting on the dresser. He waves it around and says, “But you buy albums!”

“Yeah, you got me!” Steve holds up his hands. “I’ve been known to buy an album or two.”

“So, you do have favorite bands.”

Steve rubs his eyebrow. “I guess…” He huffs. “Why is me having a favorite band so important?”

“It just is.” Eddie starts stalking around the room, scanning this way and that.

“What are you doing?”

“Do you have something to play this on?”

“You wanna listen to Robert Palmer?”

“No.” Eddie’s face screws up and he looks at the cassette he’s holding, like he’s looking at it for the first time. He falters for a moment, then adds, “I want to listen to your favorite band. Singer, whatever.”

“He’s not…” Steve trails off. This is obviously important to Eddie, and Steve can admit that Eddie’s important to him, so he pushes himself off the bed and goes over to Eddie. “Gimme that.” He swipes the cassette and puts it in the player sitting on his desk. The opening of “Looking for Clues” starts, filling Steve’s room with drums and synth.

“Is this your favorite song?”

“Sure.”

“Steve.”

Steve sighs, leaning back against his desk. He wasn’t lying when he said he doesn’t care that much about music, but there’s something about Eddie wanting to listen to what Steve likes, to want to know about Steve—because that’s what this is really about—that makes Steve feel good. Important. Seen. So, he presses fast forward, stops, presses play too early, fast forwards again until he gets to “Johnny and Mary”.

Eddie raises his brows expectantly, perched on the end of Steve’s bed.

“Yeah, this is my favorite song on this album.” And that’s not a lie either. It’s been a while since he listened to this album, but he always liked this song.

“What do you like about it?”

“If I knew there was going to be a quiz, I wouldn’t have put this on.” Steve shakes his head and says, “I guess I like the beat. You know…” He imitates the rhythm of the song with a string of do-do-do’s.

Eddie nods.

“And it makes me feel…”

“Yeah?”

“It’s stupid.” Steve’s suddenly embarrassed, which isn’t something he feels around Eddie often.

“I wanna know.”

Steve presses his lips together. He looks at Eddie, who’s waiting mostly patiently for his answer, and says, “I guess it makes me feel kinda sad.”

“And you like that?”

“Told you it was stupid,” Steve murmurs.

“No way.” Eddie shakes his head. “It sounds like a pretty good reason to like a song to me.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I mean… I used to avoid some of the slower songs by bands I like. Like I never really got Sabbath’s Changes! But, now… Listening to it feels different.” A furrow appears in Eddie’s brow; he tilts his head. “It does make me feel kinda sad. And I like that.”

The way Eddie’s saying it, it’s like he’s only realizing it now. And it’s kind of cool to make Eddie realize something about himself.

“Huh.” Steve looks at Eddie, heart skipping a beat; he might not be as into music as Eddie is, but sharing this with him is nice. He feels closer to him. It’s good. And he hopes that this is what Eddie wanted. He thinks it is.

“You know,” Steve says, “we’ve talked through most of the song. Wanna start it again?”

Eddie makes a face and Steve bites back a laugh—it might feel nice to share it, but he honestly, really doesn’t give a shit if Eddie likes the same songs he does—but Eddie nods, so Steve starts the song over.

[cherrylng]

ROCKIN’ON - MUSE (November 2009)

MATTHEW BELLAMY INTERVIEW

●"The Resistance" is an amazing piece of work. 「(Laughs) You liked it, thank goodness.」

●I think it must be a very well thought-out concept album, from the composition and arrangement of each song, to the fact that the last three songs are a suite, to the lyrics. How did you come up with the concept for this album? 「In a way, I think this work is a dramatic reflection of my real life. Because of the current situation in the UK— well, especially the political situation during the time we were making this album. Various protest actions, such as the G20 protest rally (an appeal to the world's 20 major financial conferences held in London in April 2009), the shock of the economic crisis, and the revelation that British parliamentarians were embezzling money (*the British media revealed that many members of parliament had unfairly requested additional benefits for private financial aid, housing allowances, etc. under the pretext of “public expenses”, which developed into a major scandal)… Well, it seems to have calmed down a bit now (September 2009), but at that time there was a very strong feeling among people demanding “change” - breaking down and denying the current system. It was flowing, wasn't it? That's partly because I’ve been away from England for a while now and have been living in Italy, so I guess I was absorbing information about England even more voraciously. I was probably missing England a little bit, so I watched British news on TV, read newspapers, and closely followed the coverage of various events at the time. By looking at the current situation in Britain from the outside, I was able to develop an objective perspective within myself.

At the same time, my relationship with my current lover (Gaia Polloni) is also very important to me. You could call it romance, but yeah, that’s why those two things, politics and love, were in a sense bisecting my daily life at the time. I think if you listen to the album, you can hear that there's a more dramatic, dramatized version of that happening in the album. They serve as a setting for this album. For example, the first song sings of ideas such as revolution, uprising, and a strong desire to overthrow the status quo and change, while the second song sings about an immersion into love that can almost be called a retreat. I want to feel free by being locked up in the world of two people. It is also a desire to be freed or to escape from the various problems faced in reality, such as the government, or from the many unpleasant people that one cannot trust at all. It's a feeling I've had for a while now. In this context - a romance in the midst of political unrest, upheaval, and change - each song on the album depicts a different emotional journey. This is the same thing with “1984,” and that's why I quoted a few things from that book. But the ending of the album is - what can I say, I'm not a particularly religious person, but I'm leaning towards a bit more of a spiritual direction.

In the first half of the album, I use love or romance as a means of escape, but at the conclusion of the album, I objectify the world and the people who live in it, and it becomes very objective. So, so to speak, I'm trying to objectively view the Earth and the people living on it over a longer period of time. In that sense, that last suite can almost be called science fiction, but in a sense, it's a song that starts from the perspective of the universe as evolution. Evolution is a process that progresses on a cosmic scale, and probably occurs all over the universe. Part 1 of that song has a character with a distant, bird's-eye view, looking at everything from a distance. It's almost as if the person is just gazing at various problems, problems for which there seems to be no way to solve them, from afar. So, in Part 2, the idea of escaping from that planet is depicted, and some of the inhabitants of that planet escape to outer space. So, well, we're stepping into a bit of a science fiction world (bitter smile). But then I realized that I really like that movie, Stanley Kubrick's "A.I." (*Kubrick's legacy project, adapted by Spielberg). The first half of the film depicts a typical everyday story, but towards the ending, it becomes very dramatic and reaches the level of a sci-fi drama. I really like that development. So I guess that movie may have partially influenced me. Although the majority of his (Kubrick’s) work depicts extremely mundane and “global” topics such as various problems faced by humans, love relationships, happiness, and the joy of love, in the end he depicts a completely different and spiritual place. I like the idea of making an album that goes somewhere far away from everything and is cut off from this world.」

● At the end, in the eleventh song, you sing, “Let's start over again.” This work, which opens with the order of the revolution and describes the path to its defeat, seems to contain an eternal cycle in which the revolution begins again, returning to the beginning at the end. 「Yeah, yeah. It is a kind of loop! (laugh). It's a kind of cycle of life, of things. I have also studied the work of Richard Dawkins (a Darwinist sociobiologist. He advocates memetics, which compares the spread of culture to genes. His representative works include The God Delusion). I was reading about evolution and Darwin's theory of evolution, and that influenced me a lot. Was it last year? The Darwin Memorial Festival (*Charles Darwin's 100th anniversary) was held.」

In the album's conclusion, I try to objectify the world, or rather, the earth and its inhabitants, in a longer term.

●I think it was this year. 「Yeah, yeah. That's one of the things that brought me into contact with Darwin's research and literature. I read it, and I got really into it. I read that the inside of a human being is almost like a computer program, that the inside of DNA is a storehouse of information from the past, and that the genes are basically spreading this information. In this way, some information survives, while some is eliminated. In a sense, genes are the main force controlling our lives. In this way, we are almost a shadow or reflection of something else. I think that is a very interesting way of thinking.」

●Do you think the human race is still evolving? Are we on the right track? 「Yes, of course! I think we are still in the process of evolution (laughs). But are we going in the right direction? If you ask me, I don't know. I mean, if you read books about evolution, you realize that some parts of the species are always surviving. So, for example, the way we are now, the framework within which we live, the way we live, all of these things may eventually disappear completely. There are even some people who think that the current human species does not have much longer to live! (laughs) Well, I personally sometimes feel that evolution is something very spiritual. The inner workings of evolution are actually very exciting, and through it we can gain a different perspective on time, and a different view of life. For me, it's much more rewarding to learn about it than religion, or, you know, it gives me a peace of mind.」

●As you mentioned earlier, Orwell's “1984” is the basis of the story of this work, but why has the motif of “1984” emerged in your mind now? Why did “1984” have an immediacy in your mind? 「The current British government (Labour) seems to be experimenting a lot with new technologies and things like that in their own country. For example, the newly developed technology of large CCTV surveillance cameras. Nowadays, when you go to the airport, your eyeballs are scanned (laughs).I don't know what to say. It's like the government is trying to be more sophisticated and control the people, using the excuse of "anti-terrorism" as a cover. I think we are moving towards a new period. At least in the UK. Many people (in the U.K.) have a sense that "someone is always watching" and a certain kind of Big Brother (*The dictatorial ruler/politician depicted in "1984". He is a symbolic figure who controls and suppresses people's lives and thoughts through television and wiretapping.). I think that motif is very contemporary, especially for the British. I think it is true that our freedom as human beings is slowly being taken away.」

●Is it a warning to the people? “Beware, our freedom is being taken away”? 「Yes, I think so, but hasn't it always been that way? In the past, the majority of people have always been optimistic, not worrying too much and not thinking too deeply about things. I think that's why it's important for artists to try to influence popular culture, to try to convey some of their ideas and perspectives. It might be an opportunity to make some people think about things that they have never thought about before. And, yes, I think that what I am expressing in this work is probably worth issuing a warning.」

●This is your first full-fledged self-produced album. Why did you decide to self-produce at this time? 「We have been using various studios in Europe as well as some studios in the U.S., and we got a little fed up with working in "rented" places. There are time constraints, you have to finish in a few weeks, and there are other people using the same studio, so it's very difficult in terms of time and freedom. I think it was during the recording process of the last album that the idea of "building a home studio" came to me. I learned a lot about recording technology in the process of building that studio. We bought and installed all the recording equipment ourselves. And through the process of setting up, I became aware of the recording and engineering side of the business. Until now, that part of my life has always been a bit of a mystery to me. I just watched the other people doing all this complicated stuff (laughs), and I thought, "This must be really hard work." But through the studio construction work, some of the mystery was taken away, and I was able to understand exactly what they (engineers) were doing.」

●What, if any, characteristics of the band Muse did you discover in this process of being left to make all the choices? 「Well… I don't know why we didn't do that before - it was pretty tough when we first started recording. But once we got through that phase, we realized that we were really enjoying the recording process. We laughed a lot, and I don't think we've ever had so much fun in all the albums we've made. Because with the previous albums, we were under a lot of pressure in terms of time, because we were only booked in the studio for two weeks or a few weeks, and we had to work really hard while we were there. So, yeah, I think if there's anything we've discovered about Muse, it's that we don't take ourselves too seriously (laughs).」

●Ha ha ha! 「(laughs) Especially while we are in that kind of production environment. Some of the songs are pretty heavy, and I think that's part of what made our creative environment so enjoyable. The three of us had a lot of laughs about the music we were doing, about ourselves, and about everything else. So in that sense, it was a much lighter and more relaxed experience than before. And if there's one more thing I've discovered, I think (with some emphasis) it's that this is the best way for us to record. It's probably the best creative environment for us, and it allows us to be more bold and not be afraid to try out ideas as they come to us. Because when everyone is happy and enjoying what they're doing, it sometimes gives you more courage to try something, even if it's a pretty crazy idea.」

●This album is a concept album, but at the same time, it is a work with an amazing variety of sounds, and is filled with various genres of music that are not all the same. What was the process of songwriting for the 11 songs? Did you compile songs that were born from different triggers and clues, or did you create them in order from the beginning, as if the lyrics depicted a universal story? 「Yeah… It's funny, but as far as the recording goes, we recorded the songs in the order they were recorded. We recorded "Uprising" first, and the symphony was the last song we recorded. But the songwriting process was pretty random, and there was no process. For example, I remember playing some of the piano parts in the final suite on a whim for three or four years, but I never thought they would become songs, or even something for Muse. On the other hand, songs like "Undisclosed Desires" were written almost entirely in the studio. "United States of Eurasia" was probably written a little before we started working on the album. I had a feeling that it was going to be one of the cornerstones of the album. It's a core song. That song was already ready before we recorded it, or rather, it was well-developed, and I had a clear idea of how I wanted the song to turn out. I knew exactly how I wanted the song to be recorded. But for the final suite, even though some of the piano parts were already there, the idea of making it a three-part suite, or adding bass and drums to make it a Muse song, came after I went into the studio and was not part of the plan. So "Uprising," "The Resistance," "United States," and "MK Ultra", which were already with us before we started recording, and most of the others came out of the studio as we continued working on them. Some of the songs had ideas from before, like the piano parts, and some of them were new versions of old ideas.」

●In terms of excitement, “United States of Eurasia” has a structure that has several “chapters” within one song. I think this song, which changes from an operatic melody to a Middle Eastern melody, and has an outro of Chopin's Nocturne, is a number that encapsulates the eclectic charm of this work, but where did the idea for this song come from? 「(laughs happily) That's right, maybe it's a Middle Eastern-ish “♪Dun dun dun dururu~♪” melody part, but didn't that already exist before the Wembley Stadium performance? How did it go? (Thinks for a moment) No! Around the time we performed at V Festival last year, we played a live show in Dubai, and we were able to experience a lot of cool music there. Shortly after that, I went back to England and performed at V Festival, and I remember playing a little bit of that melody during the break between songs, and Dom's mom came to see the show after the concert. But (bitter smile) she said to me, “What's that melody you were playing earlier? It was amazing.” So I thought, oh well, it might be a good idea to write some songs using that, and I thought I'd give it a try.」

●It's Dom's mom's favorite song (laughs). 「(Explosive laughter) Yeah, yeah! And, yeah, that Middle Eastern-style melody was the starting point for that song. And for some reason, I played it in the black key, the key of E flat. Because it is easy to play a melody like that (pressing the piano keys with fingers) like this. So that automatically led me to the key of E flat, which is a scale I don't normally use. My vocal range is usually D, E, C, or A, but I was not familiar with the E-flat, black key. So I had to work with a different chord arrangement than usual, and as a result, I had to build a song around that Middle Eastern groove to match it. And so the song gradually developed into a strange shape, a different type of chord shape, independent of the Middle Eastern melody that started the song in the first place. So, after I finished writing the main part of that song, I was listening to a piano piece. I think it was when I was looking at my iPod playlist, and that Chopin piece, “Nocturne/E Flat Major,” came up. It is one of my favorite pieces of Chopin's, along with the C-sharp pieces, and I thought, “Oh, this is an E-flat piece too, how interesting (laughs)!” I had never played it before, so I bought the sheet music, read it, and learned the notation so I could play it. Then I found that I could play it exactly the way it ended (laughs).」

●(laughs) I wonder if the meaning of the "song" as a unit, or the way you view it, has changed drastically since your last album. The amount of information contained in a song is completely different from your previous works. 「Yes, that's true for "United States" and especially for the symphony at the end. Of course, we try to incorporate new ideas and techniques into our music on every album, but one of the things that happened on this album was definitely a drastic change in the structure of the songs. I'm sure that will influence the next album as well.」

Dom's Interview

Translator's note: I actually finished translating Dom's interview first before tackling Matt's. The reason why? If you see the original interview itself as shown in the second image, his second answer alone took up almost the whole page of the magazine. And I had to split it into 3 text blocks simply because it exceeded the maximum of 4,096 characters that can be contained in a single text block.

It was no wonder Matt's interview took up 3 pages while Dom's only took up 2 pages.

At this point in time, I'm tempted to just set up a Ko-fi or something because this took up so much of my free time to get this scanned and translated, on top of wrangling with Tumblr itself to get this posted. Someone let me know if that's an idea to follow through or not.

[imadeoutwithmikeywayonwarpedtour]

transcript for the marina toybina interview

if you haven’t seen it already, gerard’s costume designer for the us leg of the tour, marina toybina recently did an interview for the john campea show. i saw some people looking for a transcript and i didn’t see that someone already made one so i did one!

here’s the link, the interview starts around 22:06

transcript under cut :)

INT (Robert Meyer Burnett): Well, now you just finished working with My Chemical Romance, which is a band that I dig. Gerard Way, is also a comic book writer and artist, created the Umbrella Academy.

MARINA TOYBINA: Yeah. 

INT: So first of all: how did you get that job, because there’s a design, there’s a design—the look of that band and what they like to do and what they’re influenced by, they’re not just your typical rock band. So what was it like, how did you get that job? And you designed the whole tour, right?

M: Um, I collaborated with the lead singer, yes, with Gerard. Um, okay. Everything kind of has its place in time.

M: 15 years ago, 15-20 years ago, I was a huge fan. I am a rock girl at heart. Back then, a lot of their music was like, music to my soul. It got me through some of the harder times, a lot of my friends were musicians, and I-I never saw them live, never could afford tickets to their shows, but knew one day that in my heart, I’m like, there probably will be an opportunity one day. They were like my top five favourite bands and he was just already an artist I’ve always wanted to work with. And, this past summer when I was designing So You Think you Can Dance, I just happened to turn on their music—nope, let me rewind, I’m so sorry.

M: So a year ago, I was reading a release that they’re coming back together on tour and they’re playing LA on my birthday. And I look at my team and I was like, I’m gonna be at that show, we’re gonna go to the show, we’re all gonna go together and I just jokingly said I’m like, “I’ll probably dress them.”

M: And a lot of things in my career have happened to manifestation, like I’m a huge believer in that. And I think my intentions were so clear into the universe and I believed in it so much that that happened a year ago, and then this past summer, I was driving to work, I was listening to their music, and I just happened to text my agent and I’m like, you know I really wanna get back into music. It’s what I used to do, I used to do a lot of live performances, I used to do a lot of music videos. I need to feel that again. Even though I’m surrounded by music all the time, and I’m doing all these shows. But there’s some—there was a disconnect in my career where it’s like, I love live entertainment.

M: And she’s like “Who do you want, like are we going after pop stars?” And I’m like no, I’ve done all that. I want to go back to my roots, like I want Incubus or My Chemical Romance—

INT: Nice!

M: Red Hot Chili Peppers, I’m like, get me back to rock and roll. 

M: And she was like, “Well, they’re touring but, let’s just put it out there.” 

M: And then, within two weeks I get an email from her and be like “Hey, their managers want to meet with you, he wants to meet with you.” And one of the biggest things about their aesthetic is—probably one of my top 3 costume designers is Colleen Atwood, [and she] did their Black Parade album, and it was so incredible and I, back then, I was always a step behind. It’s like, they did the Black Parade, and then I met the photographer later, then I worked on a project with him. So it was always like, some better late than never I guess. And I’m like, I’m gonna work with him someday, I love her work, I’ve been told by many people we’re a lot alike, you know? And I’m like, why not.

M: And so, we get this email that he would like to take a meeting, see what we can do. And I never expected to do the tour. I just wanted to open this door of opportunity to just collaborate, maybe do one thing together.

M: And he just showed up in my studio, and it was just, an amazing artistic, like-

INT: Were you starstruck? I mean Gerard Way is like, one of your-

M: I was trying to hold it together! I mean, before they came in, I can’t tell you how much I paced. And usually there’s like, 15-20 people at my studio, and this was the time, the day that I was alone, you know. I didn’t know what to do. And of course, my expectations were just to do like, present myself, and see if I would be a good asset to them, or something, because I love their music. I love what he’s about, and it’s also like, it’s not just the frontman for me. I think he’s a brilliant artist.

M: So there were a lot of things, I just wanted our worlds to merge somehow. And within the first five minutes of a conversation, I’m like “Oh, I get his brain.”

M: And I told him my story, I told him that this is like, 20 years in the making, and probably sound like a crazy fan costume designer. We shared ideas, he kind of walked me through the concepts of things he wants to do on this particular tour. They haven’t started doing the US leg of the tour, I didn’t know if they had a designer, and he did mention Colleen was doing something for him. And I was like, okay, how can this-can this be a triangle? [laughs] Can I come in on the picture?

M: It was just a beautiful collaboration. It was like, a genuine artist to artist conversation. Like. “Let’s do something interesting.” He walked me through his concepts, his ideas. And I’m like. alright, let me come up with some creatives, see if we’re on the same page. Again, as much as I wanted to be like, “Hey, we’re doing this tomorrow.” I also felt like it’s important, now, in my career and possibly in his, to make sure the relationship is good, you know? Like this is the right artistic match to one another. And it worked.

M: From there it was just like, amazing fittings, amazing collaboration, and some iconic things that went viral.

INT: I love hearing this from you, because this is like, the joyous experience when, “Oh my God, I’ve dreamt of working with somebody.” And you finally get to do it. 

INT: But I want to take you back to that, because I’m curious. How would that process even begin?

M: Right.

INT: You’re working with somebody that, you already know their music, you already know his vibe. And Colleen Atwood, who I’ve interviewed on the show by the way, she’s incredible. Our interview, she was in the middle of the work day so it was a short interview. But, how does a collaboration like that work with somebody like Gerard Way? How do you guys start working together? How is that process?

M: It was just like, an initial conversation, you know? I introduced myself, my work. They already did some background, kind of checking out to see where I stand, what my aesthetic was like. And I felt like, in a place in my life right now, in my career, I was able to bring something new. And that’s where my confidence, I think, came from. At the same time, I didn’t want to change the artist that’s in front of me. I think that’s always so important when working with music. You’re dealing with a fanbase and a reputation, an aesthetic approach that’s far beyond any artistic reach of anybody coming in.

INT: Right.

M: So for me it was, you know. Having a conversation, understanding what characters he wanted to bring forward. This was a very playful tour. This wasn’t about dressing up the whole band. This was about him being in this world of iconic characters and, how can we bring this to life, and what can we do that’s very recognizable to his fans, at the same time, a little bit of a shock value, you know.

M: But at the same time, I wanted him to be him. And he was in this beautiful place in his life and career right now, where he felt great, felt confident, and I just wanted to uplift that. We went through the creative decks, went through the conversations, which characters we wanted to go with. These are the shows that he had, I knew which city we kind of wanted to play off, like where was the right time, like Halloween was right around the corner, what do we do. 

M: So it was like, very strategic conversations, but at the same time, room to play and be creative. So I had just gathered the top 10 characters that we had discussed, and kind of started doing my own thing, and keeping him and the music in mind, and had an amazing fitting.

M: And I’ve never worked with an artist that’s so clear. Not just like, directional and very precise and very distinct on his own style, but it was just even clear for me when we were doing fittings that this is somebody that knows his body. This is somebody who knows his aesthetic on stage. This is somebody that knows how they’re going to perform. It just made it so much easier for me to be able to fall into his world. And do the fittings to where: Is this going to come off, is this piece staying on, are we going to do options, you know, is the character going to evolve on stage, is the character going to come down on stage. All those conversations happen in our fittings and then I just packed it all up with distinct notes, and sent them off, and then kept checking in making sure everything was okay, and yeah.

INT: So would you, when you had a direction for the characters, were you doing sketches first?

M: No, not at all! This was something that I kind of felt like, needed to have the research? It wasn’t just about designing something on paper.

INT: Right, okay.

M: When he mentioned to me, “I want to be a vintage cheerleader.” I’m like, okay what era are we in? 50s, 60s, 70s, you know, 40s? And then he was like, “Find me something that’s within, possibly, this color scheme.”

INT: Okay.

M: And for me it was like, the image that went viral when he did wear the cheer uniform. It was probably like 10 different vintage stores that we went to. And I’m like, okay everything’s size zero, or like, what am I gonna do, you know? This stuff doesn’t exist anymore, if I get it from Etsy it’s not gonna come in on time. There was so much.

M: And it happened to be as we were leaving one of the stores I look on the sale rack. And I find this damaged, weird, like, vintage cheer dress that had no zipper, that had no hem, and I was like. I love this. 

M: I love this because I can reconstruct it, I can go and get the fabrics we need to still keep it original and authentic. And that’s how we start working. I build out a dress size, I had a mannequin his size at my studio. Put it on, we reshaped it, took the whole thing apart, reconstructed it to be his measurements, and still kept it authentic.

M: And after he wore it, the pattern I think for the actual thing was sold out.

INT: Wow.

M: His fans loved it so much that we were getting notifications that people actually found the original pattern of this 1940s uniform and were buying it out.

INT: That’s crazy!

M: Oh it’s amazing. I think, to me, it’s like that’s when things are just meant to be. Not only did my work translate into something beautiful on stage, but then he becomes this incredible persona on stage that then delivers the character and plays it off. We did that throughout every single look, every single look went like, became a fan favourite, or crazy yeah.

INT: in terms of time, what was the process when you first got the gig and then to the first show that was performed using your work? What was the time-frame?

M: I think I had about a month to get it all together.

INT: Wow, so that’s not much.

M: At the same time, I had another huge project in the works. So it was going back in forth, but. I could not tell you, like, I’ve had difficult projects in the past. And I’ve had difficult times with artists, you know, finding our own language, how to execute some things. This was so easy, that time didn’t matter to me.

M: It was such a great collaboration and so it flowed, like Bruce Lee would say, like water. It just made sense. No matter how difficult my other project was, or what was going on at the same time, it was like, the universe showing me: this is how it’s supposed to be. This is what’s inspiring me. 

M: And at the end of the day, the one thing I told Gerard, “You made me fall in love with music again. You came into my life as an artist that I’ve admired and wanted to work with for almost 20 years.” And there was a big part of my beginning, that just made me look back at this now and be like oh. That was that feeling that I had when I was 16, 20.

INT: Well that’s amazing. Congratulations on that. 

M: Thank you.

INT: What an exciting project! That you did so quickly.

M: Yeah, it was amazing.

[helenofjupiter]

assigning taylor swift songs to bridgerton couples (part 1)

with explanations that no one asked for (proceed with caution)

part 2 for e, f, g and h

so i’ve been going kinda crazy about bridgerton the past few weeks, i read (and reread) all eight books and at some point while reading i couldn't stop trying to find taylor songs in my mind which would fit each couple. so i chose two songs for every pair, some of these have actual thought behind them, others are mostly based on vibes. i hope you enjoy this unhinged tangent <3

anthony & kate - i was actually reading gregory’s book when this completely genius thought hit me - treacherous IS the kanthony song. i mean it starts with “put your lips close to mine as long as they don’t touch”. insert a picture of any one of the hundred times they almost kissed in the show. even the build up of the song reminds me so much of the slow burn we had in the series. also lyrics like “i hear the sound of my own voice asking you to stay” (anthony being “what?? no!!! you can’t go back to india. wtf do you mean you’re not staying once edwina marries???”),  “and all we are is skin and bone trained to get along forever going with the flow but you're friction” through the lens of kanthony i see this line as them just constantly aggravating each other.

the second song for them is dancing with our hands tied. i hadn’t thought about this song in a criminally long time. oh boy. (i also just now realised how long this post is gonna be) “i, i loved you in secret, first sight, yeah we love without reason” i’m sorry but these dumb bitches were in love since that first fateful early morning horse ride you can’t convince me otherwise. “people started talking, putting us through our paces // but we were dancing, dancing with our hands tied, hands tied” this screams when they got caught and were forced to marry in the book. their hands were tied - they had no other choice but to marry but they were dancing because they actually did love each other (awww). other than that there are two lines that sort of go hand in hand - “i loved you in spite of deep fears that the world would divide us” and “i'm a mess, but i'm the mess that you wanted” in my head this is from anthony’s perspective. him dealing with his fear of morality and losing kate and while kate does have the eldest daughter syndrome, anthony is the bigger mess of a person in the relationship.

benedict & sophie - enchanted is a no brainer, it needs no explanation. now for their second song i picked the lakes. this resides in the vibes category. listening to this i can’t help but imagine benophie living an artsy quiet life in my cottage. i’m actually interested to see how their living situation will play out in the show because i feel in the books benedict wasn’t as involved in the ton. i guess it’s just a bit hard for me to envision show!ben being so chill about moving to some place in the middle of nowhere. 

colin & penelope - of course, dress. i listened to this on repeat while reading the whole book in one sitting. honestly a marvellous experience, can’t recommend enough . for the second song i had to go looking, had to travel far like colin one might say. and once i arrived in the long forgotten country of taylor’s debut album i found a piece of music so clearly polin coded that it’s baffling this fandom isn’t talking about it. the song in question is  i’m only me when i’m with you. it feels silly to explain this one because being from taylor’s early career the lyrics aren’t terribly clever so let’s focus on the chorus. “i'm only up when you're not down, don't wanna fly if you're still on the ground” some people want colin to be just ken in the show but i actually really liked how they both have a career in writing at the end of the book (penelope better had published the book she started writing). “the other half i'm only trying to let you know that what i feel is true and i'm only me when i'm with you” you can’t tell me this isn’t colin telling penelope she is beautiful over and over again and how much he loves him because he was a fool not to realise it sooner. while in the book penelope feeling like she is truly confident and herself around colin, i think in the show this line works from colin’s side just as well. 

daphne & simon - while most of the fandom has crowned wildest dreams as the saphne anthem (taylor’s version), i just couldn’t get behind it. yes, they used the song in their season but in my mind it just does not embody their relationship. firstly, the great war, i mean the first line “my knuckles were bruised like violets”. simon… boxing… you see the connection, right? okay, i promise it gets (even) better. “and maybe it's the past that's talking, screaming from the crypt. telling me to punish you for things you never did” in case of simon, he was hanging on to his hate towards his father and refusing to have kids with daphne, punishing her while it wasn’t her fault what had happened to him as a child. “somewhere in the haze, got a sense i’d been betrayed” i hate this part of their stroy (i do not condone daphne’s actions) yet i can so clearly picture simon still partly on his high of pleasure but starting to realise what daphne had done to him. i think i like this as their song because well they both were all kinds of wrong in this situation and at the end of the song it’s acknowledged “there's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair” and still it has a happy ending just like saphne. their second song was hard to find and i’m not a hundred percent sure about it but a present to you so it goes…  “all eyes on us, you make everyone disappear” - season 1, episode 1 “stare into my eyes”. i felt i needed to give them a sexy song and i do feel like it matches their sexual tension but this one is definitely up for debate.

[b1gtimerush]

go farther in lightness dialogue prompts from gang of youths’s 2017 album.

hey, i'll miss you when you leave.

i was a boy once, now i'm a kind-of-adult.

i feel it all, i feel everything.

i'm terrified of loving 'cause i’m terrified of pain.

i was only a kid when i fell and you tossed me aside.

can you still show me the way?

what can i do if the fire goes out?

i’m not leaving tonight.

get that thing out of my face.

i'm not dumb and you people can't dick me around.

you can rot in your sleep.

i’ll watch as you bleed.

i have come for my shit and i won't take less than that.

i will love you, but love not the powers you serve.

do not grow complacent and take less than what you deserve.

i'll always struggle to think of you in a harsh way.

i know that it's weird but i still see you for the human beneath.

i wish that i was in love with your endless bullshit.

in my blood, some electric holy yearning carries an impulse to get shit-faced on you.

i'm trying, honeybee.

since we've been talking, i’m not sure if i believe anything.

when did everything get this weird?

did you ever believe in me?

i deserve better than this.

do not let this thing you got go to waste.

where you go, i'm going, so jump and i'm jumping.

there is no me without you.

no audience could ever want you.

you crave the applause yet hate the attention.

it’s not worth it, ____.

don’t listen, ____.

you asked for my counsel, i gave you my thoughts.

no one asked for your thoughts.

can you hear me, ____? i'm talking to you.

i thought i had a real understanding then of loss, but i didn't know a thing 'til you were gone.

i used to wanna be important, now i just wanna be alive.

it's okay to feel unbelievably lost.

i live hard 'cause i am scared that i won't mean anything.

you got to persevere.

you want someone to want you for who you are.

look at me and tell me what i already know.

sometimes life sucks, everything is lame.

you give me a good reason to be heartsick again.

it's no secret that i've been losing my way.

it's not a bad time, time spent with you.

we never have to talk again, whatever, up to you.

i want someone to want me for who i am.

i'm not looking for redemption nor some shallow kind of bliss.

lay me down and kiss me deeply, show me everything i missed.

the heart is a muscle and i wanna make it strong.

i let bad love betray me once and i guess i fear the same results.

i wanna be loved, i wanna be whole again.

i just ask you to be patient if you'll have me still.

not everything means something, honey.

won't you fear me tonight?

let's drink, drink the best wine now.

i will accept you, warts and all.

i've forgotten who i was.

you're only human after all.

our time is short.

let me love with a vengeance.

did i tell you that i spent most of my sister's wedding stoned?

say yes to grace! say no to spite!

say yes to me! say yes to love!

say yes to life!

[thepalmofyourfreezinghand]

I’ve always thought they’d broken up and gotten back together more than once (during Lover and at the end of 2021 at least, imo).

I didn't follow her relationship with Joe so this is new to me. I guess from the info about when YLM was written the 2021 breakup makes sense but what makes you think they broke up during Lover? And you mean the Lover writing time or Lover promotion era? Her live performances of the Lover albums are all so full of loving eyes and sweet smiles so I would have never imagined anything like this with my nonexistent knowledge of her personal life.....I honestly miss those times so much

This is just my opinion but I think they broke up at some point in 2019, mainly (but not only) because of the way DBATC was a late addition to the album (yeah, yeah, I know, she got inspired by the movie… I still think she was processing very real events) and because of that devastating performance of Can’t Stop Loving You for the promotion of Lover and her speech about loving someone even after they’ve moved on and they don’t love you anymore. It’s just a random theory, though.

I also think she’s been “wanting” to break up with him for years (I know that the general theory is that they started having problems after the pandemic but I actually think that some “serious”problems started back in 2019), but she thought something along the lines of “I’d rather be sad with him than be sad without him” (hence Paper Rings - which I interpret a bit differently than most fans -, hoax, et cetera), and therefore she always came back to him even when they took breaks.

For the record, I’ve been thinking all of this for years (after listening to folklore I immediately thought “oh, so they broke up”), but I’ve never really talked about this because:

1. I don’t really enjoy discussing celebrities’ personal lives, and I think it can get morally ambiguous very fast, and

2. Fans have a tendency to put Taylor’s boyfriends on a pedestal and therefore nobody (except for gaylors hahah) was allowed to think that her relationship with Joe was anything less than perfect.

Now, of course they loved each other and I think the happy moments were more than the sad ones, I just think problems surfaced way earlier than some people think and I also think they broke up and got back together more than once (or at least they took breaks).

*I use “breakup” and “taking breaks” interchangeably in this answer.