#sniffing around (ask)
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piosplayhouse · 8 months ago
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"Oh dear," the unicorn thought. "I must've really mucked up the story beyond compare! The Red Bull Luo Binghe is protecting the last unicorn scum?! Unconscionable! He should have driven me off the cliff by now!!"
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mail-me-a-snail · 8 months ago
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feeling lonely in the oldest house? all too uncomfortably aware of your own mortality as a human being? bring your best friend in science dr. darling around with you to stave off the existential dread!
don't need a cheery buddy shadowing your every move? how about a masterclass in misery?
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2010's best crime fiction writer is now a bestseller in toy form! slam him against a wall! throw him into the ocean lake! read to him at night; keep him happy and the dark presence happier!
batteries may not be included, but the anxiety is!
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tennessoui · 8 months ago
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AU where Obi-Wan is like, "Maybe dumping him on a terrible desert world under his real name isn't the best idea. Obviously not everyone can be adopted by wealthy, doting rulers, but maybe Luke should have, like, health care?" And then because he's Obi-Wan, he's like, well, really all children here should, time for a revolution. Again. Sigh.
haha i think we have very different ideas about what obi-wan post ROTS is capable of during his time on tatooine — even if it’s an au where he raises luke as his under a name that isn’t Skywalker, you can’t convince me numb crying and nightmares and going through the motions isn’t at least his job 5 days out of 7. the man cannot start a revolution he can’t even keep his beard neat and tidy. he’s too worried about trying to remember what babies eat to worry about the state of the tatooine health care.
imo, au where it’s decided that they can’t let Luke keep the name Skywalker and be raised on tatooine so obi-wan takes him and goes to another small and inconsequential planet, one with less ghosts. one that he’s never set actually foot on (that he remembers)….Stewjon
meanwhile the Kenobi family on stewjon thinks it’s the most Kenobi thing to not speak to your family for 38 years and then show up heartbroken on the run and with a baby. obi-wan doesn’t MEAN to rely on the Kenobis for help, but he’s just so tired. and there’s something so nice about the community of Kenobi’s who come forward to help him with luke. Younglings are supposed to be raised communally - that’s the only thing obi-wan knows.
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This is a PSA. Check your work.
Aromatics and aromantics are two VERY different things.
Documenting your recollection of events during a mission by typing that you "paused to deeply inhale the aromantics" in the kitchen you were using as a shortcut will get you called in for further explanation.
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technoxenoholic · 1 month ago
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this is just a reminder that i block ""ai artists"", more accurately described as generative ai plagiarism prompters. i'm an actual artist and y'all ain't welcome here
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witchofthesouls · 10 months ago
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What the hell was Overlord trying to do!?!
Overlord let the impulsive thoughts win. It's bad enough competing for Megatron's attention with other 'cons, but somehow, someway... a backwoods nobody has everyone wagging their mouths, even High Command is wondering over Tarn's mystery Conjunx.
The leader of the Justice Divison is stone-cold with anyone's questions, so Overlord decided to get creative with the base's medbay to find out about you.
He expected others to come, but you come alone. And Overlord can't help himself because it's absolutely foolish that no one had warned you about anything, especially if you're asking questions about the Ununtrium injection.
You don't scream or weep, nor is there any fear in your face with the realization that you're trapped as he twists your arm and the medberth fails to heed your commands.
It's not defiance or grim acceptance in those optics. Overlord doesn't see resignation. No. You knew this would happen. You're not quite a lamb to slaughter with that hard coldness, but there's nothing to be done. He does, however, commends your pain tolerance as you give nothing but a sharp inhale as your mediocre protection is torn away.
You spit something, and nothing touches him, but he can't let that go-
His vision tilts sideways, pixelating away as his HUD is overwhelmed by an avalanche of foreign commands and security breaches. He crashes down without a word, and the last thing Overlord sees is you standing above.
Unsurprised.
(Eventually, consciousness will hit Overlord with the force of a Titan's fist. He's fiendishly sore and feels like he drank a drum of Death by Fusion: Nightmare fuel equally mixed with Gladiator's Bane. He also has that persistent itch in his plating gone, systems running far faster, and transformation sequences are fluid and smooth.)
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ratatatastic · 24 days ago
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scare the hoes more and keep yapping about ekky (& others) getting used to maffhew, it delights me. and say even more about how sasha handles this feral and sweet omega that gets dropped into his orbit. smth smth “feels like i’ve known him 10 years” or whatever vows sasha recited to the press, cameras, and god
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apparently we are taking more tumblr user ratatatastic abo yap thoughts for 500 may god hear our screams up wherever he is. big man in the sky you fuckin owe me one.
i think theres so much in particular to say in concerns of 1619 and how quickly they gelled irl but even more so in an abo au
ive always enjoyed when people assign matthew stronger scents that take getting used to if you don't like it already and i know ive read a fic where his scent notes did skew towards stronger cinnamon foods/drinks
anyways on that note it wouldnt surprise me that sasha takes so easy to this spicy little omega.
Like of course he does, he smells like the pastries he used to eat back at home, the pastries he eats now because he's found an established Finnish bakery down here that makes them homemade every morning, the bakery he likes to frequent with the other Finns when he can.
Is it ever a wonder that the cute omega that sent him such a terribly sweet text when the trade news broke out (you know, after the initial excitement worn off because Sasha does chuckle at memory of the brash "Fucking, right!" that pinged on his phone the very first time from an unknown number) smells like... home... No matter all the rumours that have swirled around Matthew, the rumours Sasha has personally experienced himself playing against him...he smells nostalgic. Like Sasha could be at home right now—you know, home home—lounging outside his cottage with tea and pastries on the little table that he's set out. The warm cinnamon that wafts from the typically sterile room they've assigned for pressers smells divine, for lack of a better word. It smells indulgent. Because Sasha can't have those homely pastries all the time, what, with his training regiment.
It's why he doesn't quite believe it that Matthew's the one that's the centre of it all. He's absolutely convinced he's hallucinating because the season is about to start and he's had to cut back on all his favourite sweets as much as it pains him to but for the betterment of the team? He'd do anything. And yet despite the way he rubs at his nose to at least try to clear it, he smells that cinnamon. That cinnamon that's definitely coming from new omega they traded over who's laughing so obnoxiously at the lectern they have set up that if his scent didn't catch your attention, his loud mannerisms certainly did. His voice is practically bouncing off the walls in big loud echoes that should hurt Sasha’s ears. Emphasis on should. As it is he finds his heart melting more than it should instead.
It's been quite a long time since someone's scent has moved him this much. All the people that have, have been in his life for so long he's forgotten what it's like to feel instant scent compatibility. His nostrils are flaring and he's trying his best not to open his mouth to huff in big gulps of it because it's rather impolite to be so obviously scenting the new guy. It could be misconstrued as Sasha taking offence to the new presence in the room.
Some part of his brain is still trying to catch up to the idea that Matthew even smells at all because the first time he met him (down here for some joint offseason ice-time) he didn't particularly smell like much, if at all really. Whether it's because he put on blockers to not intrude on pack territory until he smelled more like them, or he was still on suppressants even in the summer, Sasha wasn't sure and he definitely wasn't going to ask about it.
Known him for 10 years? He feels like he's known him his whole life. But 10's a safe number, 10's a number that won't scare off this new omega, right? 10's a number that conveys "As Captain I want this to work out, I'm opening up my pack for you, I won't shun you, you're welcome here," and not "If I stick my nose in your neck right now to scent you, they're gonna have to forcibly evict me from the new home I've found in you, and it's not gonna be a pretty outcome."
It's also why he's a little nervous when Media Day is over because despite how much it dragged along in years past it practically blitzed by and now Sasha has to—
You know, properly scent the new addition. Give them the purring acceptance of their Pack leader's scent to carry with them. And it's nothing big, it's just some chaste wrist rubbing... something subtle and not too overwhelming for everyone: the pack, and the newcomer alike. It's not like Sasha is going to mouth at Matthew's neck glands. He doesn't think he can even handle that right now but that's a problem for future Sasha—for when Matthew is really part of the pack and not like a goldfish in a plastic bag being dunked into an aquarium to get used to the water temperature. He just has to rub his wrist against his, it's like basic Alpha etiquette. It'll be fine, mostly. He hopes.
And it's as anticlimactic as he thought it'd be: gentle reintroductions and reignited chatter of excitement about the new season that's about to start... maybe just with the new lingering scent of sweet and spice in the background as if someone lit up a candle without Sasha even noticing it. It's a struggle to keep his eyes from closing from how heavy they feel, from how relaxed he feels in the presence of this new omega he knows has pissed him off on several occasions as composed as he was about it.
Matthew presents his wrist in a flourish successfully managing to divert his attention back to what they're supposed to be doing all alone like this in the dressing room like this, "I'm sure you've been dying to do this huh, Cap?"
Sweat starts to break out at the back of his neck. He knows? Sasha doesn't think he's been sending off any signals that could've hinted otherwise but Sasha admits that he's well out of practise, he hasn't had to reign in his scent this much in such a long time, and maybe Matthew picked up his weird fixation—
Matthew waggles his eyebrows for extra effect an offbeat later when the joke doesn't seem to land the way he wanted it to.
Oh, thank Christ, he's just teasing him. It's a joke. He doesn't actually mean it in the way Sasha thought he meant.
"Yes. Yes, I have," Sasha chuckles in relief, shaking his head at Matthew's attempt to lighten the mood.
"10 years, or so I've heard, bud."
"You heard? Uh, listened to the..." he trails off.
"Kinda hard not to when the setup made it sound like you were in the middle of the Earth, my guy. I don't think my ears are ever gonna recover from that."
"It's the first day for everyone," Sasha lightly chastises, not particularly aggrieved at all but wanting to keep up the banter to stall for time, so he can prepare himself. Quite honestly he feels like travelled back in time to the young anxious Alpha he was breaking out into the league for the first time.
"Be gentle, I bruise easily."
"Right, gentle. I'll treat you better than my clothes on the delicate cycle."
"Is that supposed to be a line?" Matthew says in glee, his voice pitching into incredulity.
"Line like fishing?"
"Oh, come on! You know what I'm talking about! You've been in this country long enough to pick up on that!"
"Yes, yes, that."
Matthew shoves at his shoulder playfully. "Just go on and do the thing already."
"Doing the thing."
Matthew snorts but his wrist is limp in Sasha’s hold. And as much as it was a dumb joke he does feel delicate between his fingers like that. So delicate that when he rubs his own wrist against his—to transfer over their pack scent—he feels like he's going to break it if he holds onto it for too long. It's why he drops it as quick as he took it, hands scrambling to his sides in an effort to remain polite but also to get a handle on himself so his pheromones don't go haywire with the new stimulus. It's a bit of a losing battle because he knows his scent just. But he can play it off as the excitement of an Alpha being able to claim another member to his pack, it's a possessive kind of thing.
"Well, see you around! Call it a hunch but I have a feeling we'll be seeing more of each other." And the joke wasn't funny the first time, truly the equivalent of leaning on the office fax machine and going "You come here often?" to your coworkers who just want to get their work done—and just as sleazy too with the greasy grin Matthew has permanently stuck to his face but Sasha still laughs like he did the first time he heard it.
And it's only now that Matthew is gone that Sasha realises the room smells strongly of cinnamon, so potent that anyone with a working nose would be able to tell that. Like Matthew was doing his best to ease Sasha’s obvious nerves when Sasha should've been the one to calm the omega who's been uprooted from their own pack and thrown into a completely new environment, himself.
"Jesus, it reeks in here. Smells like cinnamon," Aaron wrinkles his nose, wandering back in after his own media duties were done, finding Sasha all alone in the locker rooms.
"It does?" Like he can't tell the room smells like the equivalent of someone knocking over a Yankee Candle into an open fire.
"Yeah, like an awful lot." Aaron scrunching up his nose, trying to fight off an incoming sneeze. "It's strong," he says without thinking, swallows before his eyes shift over to Sasha and then to the floor, "Not bad just... strong..." The I can get used to it is left unspoken between them.
"I like it," Sasha admits because if Aaron is confessing to things without thinking then he might as well too. They've known each other long enough.
"I can tell." Aaron snorts, "You reek too."
Sasha lets out a questioning little noise, tilts his head to the side as he silently urges Aaron to continue.
"You have no idea what cinnamon and cardamom smell like together, do you? I feel like I walked into a bakery when I should be at the gym right now."
"Is that bad?"
"For you? No, of course not," Aaron's eyes soften, and while his scent wasn't anywhere close to abrasive, it does lighten up just a tad bit in the presence of his pack Alpha. "For me? I'd rather dunk my head in a bucket of coffee beans." A bit of an exaggeration on Aaron's part but the wry grin he has on really adds to the fact he's just joking—just a little, maybe there's some truth hidden in there. He knows how Aaron is, the way he tries to downplay anytime he bristles about something. Peace and vibes, and all that.
So Sasha can joke as well, "Forsy's stall is over there," and motions his head towards it across the room.
"Oh, hilarious."
"If I was funny I would say jock."
"You know, what? I think I will hit the gym today, thanks for reminding me."
"Mmm, anytime." And when Aaron's half out the door he adds, "Ask the staff where they put the jerseys we used today!"
"I'm going! To the gym!" he echoes back, not bothering to turn around as he shuffles down the hall in a hurry, and decidedly not going in the direction of the gym. It's not surprising when he hears chatter pick up and shoes scuffing briskly into the direction of the laundry rooms.
#ask#instead of actually writing the things i wanted to get done i did this instead thanks guys#not to “controversially new hot younger girlfriend” maffhew but im gonna#timeline here doesnt make sense like quote wise so like you know#chat... matthew was not joking when he said well be seeing more of each other#he was fully intending to sit on that knot the first time he saw sasha#sasha is just dumb#god can you just imagine the ways in which maffhew would drive this nice polite alpha absolutely insane#can you imagine the way sasha accidently brushes his hand across the back of his neck because hes trying to wrap an arm around his shoulder#in camaraderie and sasha is so apologetic about it because dynamic classes in finland are intense and hes so remorseful about it#and then in the midst of all that maffhew just turns into this little purr machine and sasha is like oh i think i touched a button i should#not have touched at all oh god oh fuck#and maffhews like mmm? whyd you stop#pan to sasha silently freaking out#not to say sasha doesnt enjoy scruffing his omegas because they love it but he hasnt met one who enjoys it as much as maffhew does#and it kinda fucks him up#also speaking to ekky getting used to maffhews scent like oh boy i can see sooooo many ways that can go down like maffhew is respectful#of ekkys boundaries but also at some point ekky has had enough time to mope and for lack of a better word he does need to grow up#which is why maffhew starts off subtly you know standing on the dman side of the lockers for a few minutes. chatting up the guys over there#before ekky walks in you know leave a ghost of his scent around. its not strong and its not offensive but it certainly is there#eventually he just full on starts chucking his dirty socks at ekky after games#going oops sorry missed the bin didnt mean to snipe you (he absolutely did. he gets extra points if he hits ekkys face!)#sometimes a stray jersey too. if he really wants to make ekky mad he will just slingshot his biohazard-in-training-jock over.#i also think when ekky gets the yips when he starts pacing a little harder than usual when his chuckles turn a little too nervous#maffhew has enough and just like a worried hen of a men just manhandles ekky around in his arms and shoves at him till he puts his nose#in his neck and ekkys arguing the whole time like this isnt necessary im fine-#and matthews like right im sure thats why your teeth are chattering worse than a fucking woodchipper eh?#ekky cant really reply to that and maffhew tells him to just shut up and start sniffing#and it does help and he hates that he admits maffhew was right that he just needed to be clucked over by another omega#opening yapdoras box the lot of you. utterly awful. I HAVE THINGS TO DOOOOOOOOOOOO
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pollenallergie · 1 year ago
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I had the thought of Tom or Billy sniffing their new babies and I thought of you for some reason.
-cj aka @cheesewritings
no bc billy loves the new baby smell. like from the minute you bring your baby girl home (he’s a girl dad, first and foremost, fight me. maybe he’ll have a son later on, but his first kid? a girl, the girliest of girls.) and she stops smelling like hospital (probably after her first bath… which was somehow both a chaotic scene and a warm, wholesome bonding moment for the three of you), he’s got his nose to her dome like all the time, just breathing in the newborn baby smell mixed with the lavender nighttime baby shampoo you two had cleaned her fluffy, downy hair with. at first, billy tries to be discreet about it, because he thinks it’s weird. however, when he catches you sniffing her too one night as you rock her to sleep, he realizes that maybe he’s not so weird after all… or maybe you two are just equally weird… but, billy thinks, if he’s weird in the same ways that you’re weird, then that truly wouldn’t be so bad after all because at least your brand of weird isn’t off-putting (in his opinion… you disagree on the grounds that 1) you don’t think his brand of weird is off-putting because you don’t think anything about him is off-putting and 2) you think you can be at least a little off-putting sometimes).
as for tom, i hc tom (at least the version of him from my older!tom au) as not ever having kids (simply because he doesn’t want to have them), but you can bet that anytime he meets one of his newborn nieces or nephews (he has quite a few siblings… which means he also quite a few nieces and nephews) for the first time, he’s always quick to cuddle up to them, cradling them gently in his arms (now that’s been through this whole thing a dozen or so times, he’s a pro at holding newborns), and luxuriating in their soft skin and sweet newborn baby scent.
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comradecowplant · 8 months ago
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so things are not going well with my new elderly socdem friend unfortunately.
#she said this RIGHT after talking about how bad yt misinfo is... which she followed up w SO I WAS WATCHING A YT DOC ABOUT WW2 & LEARNED THIS#youtube 'historians' are literally the most fascist breed of youtuber. avoid the vast majority like the plague lmao#i asked if the video was sourcing the hollow dahmer & the black book of communism & she didnt seem to know what those are lol#to her credit i told her straight up that she was incorrect & she at least faked being curious about doing more research but i am doubting#she also 'learned' that lenin killed trotsky lol get your propaganda right lenin was dead by then STALIN icepicked him <3#anyway im making jokes bc the worst part was a different conversation where she spoke positively of israel#THAT'S gonna be the one to ruin our friendship. fuck you & your war tourist friend who fought in the 1960s landgrabs that youre now#telling me as if this is a cute story. nahhhh lmao i looked her straight in the eye & said i will NOT debate this#so she dropped it like the true enlightened centrist most socdem cowards are and i kept cleaning her house quietly#turns out You & Me We're the Only Ones Around Here Who Aren't Complete Fools was premature *kicks the poorly rendered gravel sadly*#shes otherwise a nice lady & i know i need to be more flexible in order to hopefully change ppls minds...#but also when people say awful & untrue things it makes me not want to talk to you 🤷‍♂️ srry 2 b a freak like that#also i know shes not transphobic but i havent sniffed her out well enough to know if shes safe to come out to#so its hours of misgendering (which isnt her fault she doesnt know) bc shes obsessed with neoliberal feminism and inappropriately brings#gender into conversations that it does not belong in#'did you know all the countries that handled covid best were ran by women?' 1) untrue 2) dont care finland still sucks#she also tried to tell me that european rich people learned to be nicer after the french rev & thats why europe is better than america...#girl shut up we learned how to be so good at racism and capitalism BECAUSE of europe. there is no such thing as a good rich person!!!#i pick my battles (genocide & anticommunist genocide revisionism) so i let her cook w that one & was not left convinced as you can imagine#ANYWAY rant about today's weird day done. gonna smoke weed & rim some skies 🥵 while listening to the Khrushchev Lied audiobook i found 😘
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ahsokasforce · 1 year ago
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supernatural writers really hate women because why is when mary screws up is “why don’t you just try to be a mom for once” and when john literally abuses sam and dean for over 20 years it’s “well it’s okay dad we know you did your best” like… HE DID NOT? STAND UP!! they made dean trauma dump on mary and list all the shit that happen to them when it’s was over john’s watch because she was dead? and that “i hate you but i love you” moment? WTF??😭😭😭 they were never this harsh on john but all it took was one single season to be enough to hate her… anyways thank you supernatural for bringing her back so people could say she’s on the same bad parenting level as john and killing her off for male trauma 😻🎉 girl power girls get it done etc etc
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blue-rose-soul · 18 days ago
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What do you think on the opinions of the canon Hazbin crew if they meet your AU counterparts? There could be multiples opinion since there are many different AUs
Ooof, there would be a ton of opinions to go through since there's a lot of characters across a lot of sub-AUs. But ultimately I think most everyone's opinions would boil down to: 'what the fuck.' I do try to keep everyone's personalities consistent across the different AUs though - except where circumstances would directly impact their personalities, like in the Raised Together AU - so I suppose most of them would have pretty similar reactions to their canon counterparts. I'd be here all day if I were to try to summarize everyone's reactions.
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berriweb · 1 year ago
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hi!! just curious will there be any smut in your miles series? can’t wait for the next part!
bitch what??
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tennessoui · 1 year ago
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Inspired by mosquitoes biting me more than anyone I know, does Anakin smell super delicious to the vampires? Is it just to Obi-Wan? Or does his blood smell delicious to all of them and Obi-Wan gets hugely possessive of him when the others sniff curiously?
ooo I already have a vampire au where obi-wan’s blood smells really good to all vampires (it’s like a vampire glory hole au lmao) so to switch it up I’m gonna say nah his blood just smells sort of normal to other vampires. Definitely smells good cause it’s blood and they’re vampires, but it doesn’t smell like nectar from the gods or anything
doesn’t mean obi-wan can’t be overtly possessive from the get go though cause he thinks it tastes divine 👀
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a-noodle-named-daemon · 1 year ago
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So this guy decided to come out at midday today, first time ever he’s come out on his own during daytime ☀️
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thevalleyisjolly · 2 years ago
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I have zero involvement or investment in whatever hell the pirate fandom’s been apparently raising, but all I’ll say is that clearly the best pirates are the Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything.
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firebuug · 1 year ago
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happy birthday julie!!!!!!! i hope it has been just as awesome as you are (exponentially awesome)
i love you so so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! happy 21st bday!!!!!!!!!💚😺😺💜
💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💖💖💖💖💖💝💝💝💝💞💞💞💞💕💕💕💕💕💚💚💚💚❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❤️❤️❤️🧡🧡🧡💛💛💛💚💚💚🩵🩵🩵💙💙💙💜💜💜🤎🤎🤎🖤🖤🖤🩶🩶🩶🤍🤍🤍🩷🩷🩷🩵🩵🩵🩷🩷🩷🤍🤍🤍🩷🩷🩷🩵🩵🩵❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂👥💜💚
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whWGJFKFHHJEKGHG WILSON UR SO SWEET WAUBHGGH THANK YOU SO MUCH AND THANK YOU FOR THE PRECIOUS CAT PICTURES.....I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!‼️‼️‼️‼️💚💚💚💚
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