#small rambling
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I just started working and something tells me that I won’t be able to go through Tickletober 💀
Does anyone has any advice for balancing a working life, a student life and a secret tickle blogger life maintaining a decent sleep schedule and good mental health? No one?
#ellie’s personal life#small rambling#guys I don’t know how I’m going to survive here#this is crazy#why did I start a new university#and also got a part time job#and also continued eith my weekend job?#i wanted to start going to the gym#but i also want to write#and draw#and lately my head is filled with tickle fantasies bc i’m touch starved#please send help
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I'll be freezing to death, but I'll never say that warm is better than cold.
On top of that it is cloudy outside (The application has not set it up correctly, as you can see).
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When I was a kid, we moved into a house that had a huge lilac tree out front. It was mostly rotten, and it needed to be taken down before it fell. It took a while, but eventually, it was gone.
Mostly. A couple years later, little lilac babies popped out of the ground in its place. My mom was determined to get rid of them, because she'd planted a beautiful flower garden there, and the lilac trees would overshadow and kill the whole garden. I insisted on saving at least a few saplings. She said fine, but I had to dig them out and put them in pots myself.
So, I did. I spent days digging little lilac bushes out of the ground and putting them into pots. Some couldn't be saved, but some could. When all was said and done, I had five brand-new lilac saplings. Seven or eight years old, and it was my absolute pride and joy.
Three died due to sun scorching, severe drought that no amount of watering could save, and perhaps just being moved from their place in the ground. But two survived, and I was awfully proud of them! I'd go out and talk to them every single day. I watered them by hand and made sure they were fertilized properly. I learned all about their favored environments, and I was determined to make sure they lived.
One of my mom's friends saw what I was doing with the lilacs. She asked if she could have one to put in her backyard, and I agreed on the condition that she take very, very good care of it.
It's now fucking enormous. I'm talking ten feet tall and bursting with beautiful purple flowers every spring. My mom still gets updates each year as they start to bloom, which she forwards to me. And all I can think is, "That's my friend! Thriving some twenty years on, there it is."
The other tree nearly died, too. It lived in a pot for far, far too long. I wanted to plant it somewhere in my parents' yard, but my mom was reluctant. Eventually, we agreed to put it in the far back garden. It grew okay for many years, despite the shade, but in all these years, it's never bloomed.
Last year, the massive tree casting massive shadows over the lilac and the garden cracked in half and fell. It tumbled into the garden, crushing part of the nearby shed and destroying a few plants beneath it.
It missed my lilac by inches.
The clean-up is long done. The rest of the tree has been cut down, and my lilac has full sunlight for the first time in fifteen years. It won't bloom this year, I know. But it's got new shoots up. It's taller than ever. I spent half an hour a few weeks ago praising it for surviving all this time, dreaming about its future and telling it how I believe it'll become the tall beauty it's always been meant to be.
I think next year, I'll see flowers.
#aese speaks#a little personal story for you all#the origin of my life-long relationship with lilacs#i've been a garden witch since i was very small! (:#green witch#garden witch#garden magic#the lilac post#hello to everyone reading the og tags on this:#it's a metaphor it's a true story it's real it's fiction it's a poem it's me rambling it's whatever you think it is#30k
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The thing I keep coming back to, with all the *gestures expansively* is that real life doesn't have peaceful epilogues.
Every single win has to be defended. Forever. I'm sorry. It sucks. The Nazis lost until they stopped losing. The US had abortion rights, and then 50 years later it didn't. Empires fall, and then they invade other countries again. Oppressive regimes are overthrown and replaced with other oppressive regimes. You will never finish the work etc etc etc. Which is why it's so fucking important to be able to acknowledge and celebrate progress, when it happens. The people who came before you didn't put in all that work for nothing, and you aren't, either. You can't save it all for the Ultimate Victory because there is never going to be an Ultimate Victory. There's no such thing as a time when everything is good, and ours shall not be the commune of Heaven.
#rambling#like by all means always push for more#but man you gotta be able to note the small victories too#and you have to be able to step away for a bit when you need to because there's never going to be an Ultimate End#op
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hating that i get so upset over the stupidest shit like wtf is wrong with me??
#small rambling#idk what im doing#relatable#sparrow speaks#i think thats my tag for my personal thought posts#idk
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"binge-worthy show" man fuck that
i want my shows one episode followed by a whole ass week of going a little insane over it with the people on my phone, writing fics theorizing and going over every single scene through amazing gifs and meta, before the next ep drops and the cicle begins anew
#meegs rambles#yes this is about willow 2022 it owns my heart#and also its fandom like we are small but i apreciate u guys all so sosos much#willow#willow series#willow disney+#willow 2022#willow (2022)
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honestly it was a red flag when bbc sherlock went “well obviously the word written in blood isn’t the german word for revenge, it’s clearly the beginning of the name ‘rachel’, what absolute idiot would fail to see that” when in the original novel it is, in fact, the german word for revenge, which sherlock points out gleefully to a roomful of policemen who all figure it’s the beginning of the name ‘rachel.’
and by red flag I mean it was a clear sign that the adaptation was trying to one-up the source material, instead of engaging with it with love.
#sherlock holmes#finx rambles#this kinda bugged me even when I first watched it and still thought it was a super cool show#and tbh it WAS super cool in a lot of ways#they had such dynamic and exciting editing#good pacing#cool character introductions#great snappy lines#but this was a small thing that rankled even then
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I love how unsanitized The Terror feels. Like there’s grime everywhere. You can tell those men smell bad. When they do surgery you can hear the bone being cut, when they get sick they look genuinely ill. The main character’s actor even has pockmarks, he LOOKS like he could be from the 1800s! And idk, I think it’s cool that we’re so aware of the characters’ carnal desires. They’re hungry, thirsty, freezing, etc, and it is so obvious that they have a body with needs!!
I think this also accounts for how horny the show feels, even though everyone is bundled up 90% of the time and there are no real romantic subplots. Besides the fact that it’s a very carnal show, it just has the intimacy and grime of true horniness. Is this thing on
#rambling#virtually none of my mutuals/followers like The Terror… y’all please give it a shot…..#it’s SO MUCH like jsamn. like surprisingly similar#speaking of fantasy novels#I should write a little essay about how many Great Stories have a sense of physical realism to them!#like think about Lord of the Rings#in those books it takes them ages to get anywhere. they spend a lot of time talking about their water bottles and food supplies#and I’m thinking of that one bit where they spend the whole chapter trying to figure out how to get down a small cliff#you FEEL like you’re hiking with them#same sorta deal with the terror#the terror#the terror amc#I’m talking about horniness very confidently for someone who is ace lol
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swing with me
#ops personal tag ramble upcoming did you know my tablet pen has been dead for the past month i had to draw this on my laptop#w my small kamvas pro 13 (i use a kamvas pro 20)#had to cuz the idea was rotting at my brain <3#shuake#akeshu#persona 5#p5#persona#joker#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#goro akechi#my art#illustration
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Okay so this is something everyone is experiencing? Cause I got so demotivated seeing all these bots like I always hope it’s an ACTUAL new follower and then I have to hit the block button T-T
beating the p*rn bots off my front porch with a sweeping brush as we speak
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Look at the little changes Jinx made to her work bench compared to season 1.
Look at the little drawing Isha made of them. Isha's got mirror (refrigerator) rights.
The real question now is if Jinx lets Isha watch her do her self-administered first aid, or does she hand Isha the stapler and let her feel useful?
#arcane#arcane ramble#jinx arcane#isha arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2 spoilers#very on brand for jinx to let a small chikd stay in her haphazard workshop#just like a parent that will let their child hang in the air rafters for some reason#at least it was an office#those rails don't do much
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I’m really sorry to ask but… is anyone still interested in Hazbin Hotel? If I published something would you still read it?
Sorry I feel like I don’t exist if I don’t publish something but I’ve had a lot of stuff going on lately.
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Nooooo Charles, what did they do to you????
Well, time to open the game.
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neurotypicals when someone asks you to repeat yourself please please please for the love of god just repeat the whole sentence not just PART of it, i don't know what you're talking about and saying what you think is the most important part actually doesn't help iT TAKES TWICE AS LONG BECAUSE I HAVE TO ASK YOU TO REPEAT IT AGAIN ANYWAY WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS
#ramble#example from today that nearly made me break a window#'bhfskhughghgh fghgfj your book'#'what?'#'about your book'#'what about it????'#proceeds to look at me like i have no brain#sorry it's shark week and small things are driving me crazy#someone was vacuuming today and i almost started crying
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Drake Siblings
Have I read this prompt somewhere or was this a fever dream from my bored mind.
What if, now hear me out.
What if we bring up Dana Winters-Drake (whose confirmed to at least be alive in the DC verse but no one knows where she actually is)
What if instead of when she had a mental breakdown and getting committed to an Bludhaven clinc she wandered away before anyone noticed and by the time Tim or anyone did notice a lot of stuff started happening at once in both Gotham and Bludhaven (Steph dying, The Bludhaven crisis, etc etc)
Tim still tries to find her though but even with best resources it was like she just disappeared into the wilderness and the stress of trying to handle more and more problems get worse.
So when out of the blue, a couple of years later, he gets a call from an unknown number. On his private, only for friends and family, phone and when he answers he meet with a young girls voice on the other end.
A very young, maybe six or seven, girl who informs him about his apparently half-brother Danny Drake-Fenton. And how she loves Danny so, so, so much but knows her home is dangerous for him to be in.
Tim is stunned and before he could question her, she says Danny is Dana and Jack's baby and that her parents had adopted him years ago and put Dana's stuff that the hospital had away for him to look at when he was older but she just had to fight off their lunch from eating her brother and she knows he needs a better place to live and so she snooped around and found Dana's diary and that she had to unscramble the nonsense Dana wrote and found Tim's number with the words 'tell him about his brother Danny' hidden in it. And-
But before she could keep rambling she hears Danny screaming "JAZZY THE MILK WENT BAD AGAIN AND HISSED AT ME!"
Tim is left with silence after hearing Jazz yell to Danny to lock the fridge and step out of the kitchen as she gets the bat.
#danny phantom#danny fenton#crossover#dp x dc#blue rambles#danny phantom dc#writing ideas#random idea#dpxdc#jazz fenton#tim drake#danny and tim are half brothers#dana Winters-Drake was pregnant when she disappeared#she was out of her mind until she found out and tried her best to regain control but it was hard#she had in and out episodes#she wanted to contact Tim but knew he was still in Gotham and she just coulnt due to episodes of her mental health failing#she was found months later in labor and rushed to a hospital and Danny somehow came out healthy#small but healthy#Dana however lasted a few more hours before passing away from the birth#weeks laters Danny is adopted or fostered out#Dana wrote in diary but scramble and scribbled during her episodes#Jazz finds it and being the smarty she is starts figuring it out#it also set her on her path to understand the human mind#Tim gets to be a big brother#not just for Danny though#hes gonna take Jazz in too after he finds out about how bad the home life is#will Danny still become Phantom though?#maybe#maybe Tim gets there and Jack and Maddie finished the portal way earlier than canon and Danny being curious goes to see#and comes down the stairs to see his baby brother die and then come back
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Just a reminder that this tiktok banning stuff is literally just a distraction for law makers to pass more god awful bills. Don't get distracted from the real issues of people getting thier basic human right being taken away by weak old fashioned boomers.
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