#siren stan pines

[haro0o]

Siren stan got caught by bill

Also some doodle

[gravityfalls4life]

Hey dipper, Have you heard of Arcadia Oaks? A small town thats a hotbed for supernatural activity? Ive heard it contains Trolls, Aliens, and Wizards and that theyre all protected by a handful of Teenagers with weapons and magic

Ooooooooooh

I'd wanna go there....

It looks cool!

Maybe it's Gravity Falls in another dimension? Sixer?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[235uranium]

not to be back on my bullshit already but like. ford talking about how he doesn't understand romance in journal 3 quite literally does not prove he's ace in any sense of the definition unless you assume only ace people struggle with traditional relationship models (literally not fucking true??) or that aro people are always/usually ace (I am beating you with a broom). it's evidence towards him being aro if anything!

but even then I think that's an accidental meaning in the writing. the passage exists to show how detached ford is from the sheer idea of family and how he doesn't understand fiddleford's attachment to his wife and son! it's also a subtle reason to show why the pines family might not notice anything after the portal incident (i.e- ford didn't talk to his parents or sister much, if at all, after moving to gravity falls.)

it's even more frustrating when ppl mention that line... and then make him alloace?????

[velnoni]

any romantic/nsfw headcanons for stanley pines in a relationship with a trans man who has top surgery already? can be young or old stanley, it doesn't matter

Admittedly, I've never written for a trans male reader, so I hope this came out good. Hope you enjoy it!

Stan Pines x Trans Male Reader

His dating pool is quite minimal if we're being honest here but when he meets you he's genuinely embarrassed, trips over his words a bit, and sweats more than normal. Definitely has the hots for you.

Over the years he's mellowed out and accepted that he could be into guys as well, keep in mind this is a fella who grew up in the 50s so expect him to be a bit nervous or rough around the edges. He shows a genuine interest in you and tries to woo you by giving a tour of the Myserty Shack, ending on the note of giving you his personal number.

Enjoys showing you off. Does not care for the age gap if there is one. Truth be told, he hadn't realized how lonely its been all these years. He really likes giving you kisses on the forehead or sneaking up behind you to tickle your sides in the morning. Will proudly grab your shoulder or waist in public and wiggle his eyebrows to make you laugh or get flustered.

In regards to your top surgery scars, he won't ask too many questions except for maybe did it hurt or how long it took to heal. If you ever feel uncomfortable about it or how they look, he'll smile gently before raising his own wife beater to show his aged body littered with scars, each one with stories from his younger days. Claims that you're both matching.

"They ain't somethin' to be worried about trust me." And he genuinely means it. He's not gonna pretend to know what you been through or force a story outta you. But just wants you to feel comfortable in your own skin, especially around him. Life is too short to be worrying unless you hear sirens.

He does like to kiss the scars or touch them. He likes how they feel under his fingertips.

He'll call you handsome, beefcake, cutie, or a shortened version of your name as terms of endearment. Wonders if it's appropriate to buy flowers for guys, too. He's a bit old school and might get you a bouquet of daises for the first date. If you do that for him, he'll nervously laugh and accept the flowers. If his eyes are watering no they're not.

On slow days, when it's just the two of you laying in bed, he likes to cuddle and caress your happy trail if you have one. If not, then he'll run his hands alongside your belly till he doses off.

nsft under the cut

He likes to top as it's something he's more used to and will gladly eat you out if asked. Enjoy when you wear more revealing outfits near him because his body will act like a hormonal teenager around you.

He's pretty good with his tongue and fingers, a bit on the rusty side, but enjoys hearing your moans when he slips his fingers inside your tight walls. He likes to edge you a lot since if he cums once it'll take longer for him to get it back up. His stubble when he leans in to kiss your neck during intercourse ironically makes you feel more sensitive.

Please sit on his face. He loves squeezing your ass a lot and smelling your natural musk right on his face, it drives him wild.

If you want him to use toys on you at first, he can't help be slightly offended. He ain't good enough for you? But you reassure him that it's a good way to spice up the night and help when he needs a break. He doesn't mind plunging dildos inside of you every now and then after that convincing argument, plus it's fun to push your limits with permission.

Pegging him, fingering him? It'll be a very long time before you can convince him to bottom for you or just try new things. It's unfamiliar territory but maybe you coax him just enough with a blowjob and a lot of explaining then maybe just maybe you'll be greeted with the view of a nearly knocked out Stan painted with his own cum, with your strap on deep inside his ass.

[tswwwit]

Though I haven't gone into much detail about Stan and Ford in the Familiar AU, I've thought of something funny.

The Stans went on Unspecified Adventures together when they were younger men. Partners, in fact! And while I'm likely never going to get into the details of their eventual falling out - there's potential in those adventures!

Who knows. Maybe monsterfucking kinda runs in the Pines family, but not the one you'd think.

Stan chatting up a Siren, before Ford has to yank his brother back by the shirt. Wondering where the hell Stan went, only to find him partying with some nymphs in a lake and coming THIS close to being drowned. Hell, maybe when Stan describes one of his exes as a 'shrill harpy', he's being literal about it.

A twenty-something on the prowl and on the adventuring path is gonna run into SO many tempting creatures - and the number of times Ford saved Stan's dumb ass from human-ish ladies would go into the DOZENS.

[pinesfamilyguidetotheweird]

Ford Pines Headcanons Part 01

Feral Ford

Yep. Sending over that. As it was said, this side of Ford was initially created during moments of high stress and adrenaline and a need for self-preservation, where rational thought gets pushed aside. It escalated during his stays on 'wild' planets.

Experimented On

Ford was born with brown eyes, like his brother. However, at some point during the early years of his travels, Ford gets kidnapped by some unethical organization and was experimented on. Said experiments caused his eyes to change color, along with strange patterned irises (which you can't notice unless you look reeaal close) plus gaining a bit of tapetum lucidum. The experiment also gave him something like an enhanced healing factor, though it doesn't heal most scarring, plus some enhanced strength, speed, and agility. Not by much, but very much noticeable, especially at his current age.

Phobias

Ford has had many phobias over the years. His main one being his fear of snakes. His other fears are eyes (usually multiple eyes at once) and being stared at. He's also not a fan of the idea of hospitals because of the headcanon above this. He's afraid of someone finding something inhuman in his body.

Ace of Spades

Perhaps this is me projecting a little. Sure, Ford had a prom date and, apparently, dated a siren. The prom date ended with the girl throwing fruit punch on Ford for some reason (maybe he said something unintentionally insulting?) and it's unknown what happened with the siren...maybe they tried to eat him?

Disowned

Filbricks disowned Ford when he noticed that Ford's choice of study wasn't going to make them rich and Ford refused to change. The disownment left Ford feeling worthless. A moment of vulnerability that Bill will take advantage of.

Still Wanted

Even if Bill's gone, I'm pretty sure that some of the actions Ford has done during his travels has garnered the attention of many intergalactic governments and/or people of interest. So, his bounty remains active.

A ‘Better’ World No More

The 'Better World' where Stan listened to Ford and took Journal 1 away from Gravity Falls and Ford and Fidds founded Oddology? Ford no longer sees it as the 'better' world because it doesn't have his brother and niblings in his life.

Trauma

Boy howdy! Along with having major trust issues and permanent scarring, c-PTSD is also present. Along with occasional seizures because of the electrical torture he went through.

ADHD/Autism

Again, projecting here. lol

Memories Lost

This is after his surgery for the metal plate in his skull. A risk was some memory loss. Nothing major, but could still be a concern. Ford felt it was a good trade. Some memories for a way to protect himself from Bill? Sure! And he seems to be doing pretty well afterwards, so maybe the memories lost weren't anything important... Probably.

[sovengardeswag]

The Pines Files

After the events of Weirdmaggeddon, Dipper and Mabel are contacted by the SCP foundation and join the ranks. The adventure never ended, it just took a different turn. And now, years later, they're back to Gravity Falls, aka SCP-████. And it is up to them to investigate the ever-growing mystery behind the town and protect the most dangerous and important SCPs there are and face their past.

Chapter 3: Business as Usual

Dinner had not been the awkward, miserable, and accusatory event that Dipper’s anxiety had convinced him it would be. In fact, it was downright pleasant. The places to eat in Gravity Falls weren’t exactly endless, even with expansion, but the town certainly had new places at least, including a Cheesecake Warehouse. The tacky Greco-Roman-Egyptian-80’s ostentatiousness of the place was almost a comfort after the last five years of his dingy [redacted] apartment or the site-19 cafeteria. He took a breath of the restaurant air and went up to the hostess, quickly tucking in his dress-shirt when he noticed it was displaced. “Uh, hi, I’m here to meet up with a party of 4. It would be under the name Pines?”

The young woman looked up from her computer then, asking Dipper, “For 6 o’clock, right?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

“Right this way, sir,” She led Dipper to where Mabel and his grunkles were waiting, Mabel’s charm bracelet jingling as she waved to him, “Dipper! You made it!”

“Course I did! I’m not a flake.” Dipper sat down, taking a menu from the hostess and flipping through the unreasonable number of pages. “Did you guys order yet?”

“Nah, we just got here,” said Stan.

“That’s good. I got kind of turned around on the way here, it’s been a while, ya know?”

“No need to apologize, Stanley and I almost got lost as well. It didn’t help that he tried to find us a shortcut.”

“I’m telling you, Sixer, it would have worked if someone hadn’t started building a bunch of traffic lanes there.

Dipper couldn’t help but laugh a little, it seemed nothing changed with these two. “Was the construction near the lake?”

“Yeah, it was, something about making it easier to go there or something.”

“Speaking of water,” Mabel added, grabbing a piece of pumpernickel from the basket. “How was this year’s trip? I wanna hear everything! How was Armand? Was it the tearful, historical romance style reunion I’m thinking of?”

“Actually, Stanley almost rammed us into a rocky island off the coast of California.”

“Oh, come on, I said I was sorry!”

“It’s not judgment, Stanley, no one can resist a siren song and Armand had everyone stop when he realized it was me.”

“Made them stop? Is he their king or something?” Dipper asked out of curiosity.

Ford clarified, “No, not a king. Sirens operate as fully autonomous anarcho-communes-”

Stan then interjected, “Basically, they’re hippies and it was his ex’s turn with the conch.”

“Well, I think it’s romantic that he recognized you after all this ti- Dipper are you seriously taking notes?”

“No," Dipper lied, quickly putting his pen and notepad back in his pocket. Stan laughed at his embarrassment before he admitted, "Sorry, it’s kind of hard to turn off the whole, ‘take notes on everything and anything weird,’ mentality.”

“Nah kid, it’s fine, you’ve been doing this as long as I’ve known you. Of course, you’re gonna take notes on mermaids.”

“Sirens, Stanley.”

“He gets my point.”

Dipper took his notepad and pen back out of his pocket, clicking the pen before asking, “Can you tell me about the anarcho-communes? Is that universal among sirens or just Armand’s community?”

“Is everyone ready to order?” Interrupted the waiter right on time.

Dipper set his notepad aside, quickly looking over the drinks menu, “Uh, yeah, I’ll have the,” he squinted, “the super-skinny-you’ll-forget-you-had-kids margarita?”

“And I’ll have a pitt-cola please,” added Mabel.

“And two beers for us,” Ford finished off, the waiter nodding and leaving.

“Still not drinking, Pumpkin?”

“Yeah, absolutely not. Besides, someone’s gotta be the designated driver around here.”

“You got me there.”

And just like that, things were almost, well, normal. To say he felt 12 again would be a lie but what it did remind Dipper of was being 17 and about to go off to college, like this kind of thing would last forever, even if his knees hurt sometimes now. He enjoyed his oversized meal and was just allowed to feel happy. He didn’t even mention work, it came up when Ford mentioned it. “By the way, Dipper, are you going to be working with Dr. Clef?”

“I don’t know, why?”

“Oh, no reason. I just met him a few times when he worked for the GOC. He would have been very young at the time, I’m not sure if he would remember me.”

“I’ll say hi if I see him.”

Mabel butted in then, saying, “And if Dipper doesn’t see him but I do, I’ll say it.”

~

The next morning, Mason headed straight to work. It was almost surprising how quickly he adjusted back to routine. When he arrived at the staff room to await his assignment, he even found that he was early, knowing the town like the back of his hand, minus that little hiccup from yesterday. With people mostly just milling around the staffroom and not sure what else to do until assignments were handed out, he scrolled through his phone, checking the comments on his neglected YouTube channel. He almost didn’t notice that someone said something to him. “Oh, sorry, what was that?”

The person who spoke to him was a woman of about 25. “I asked if you’re a local,” she said.

“Uh, no, not really, I’m from California. I used to spend summers here though. Why?”

“Oh, you just seemed like you were,” she clarified. “I’m new and almost got lost on the way here. I should have expected it but this town’s layout is kind of weird.”

“Eh, you’ll get used to it. To tell you the truth, this is my first day at this facility. I was transferred from site-19, so we’re both having a first day.”

“Wow, really? I wish my first assignment was there. I read through some of the containment procedures, it seems like some of the objects there would be amazing to work with."

“Some of them can be. Others are just awful. They can’t all be coffee machines that give you dragon’s blood.”

“True, but still- “

It was then that attention was called to the front of the staff room by a member of HR, “Alright everyone, eyes up here! Since everyone’s new here, I’ll speak nice and clear, but I’ll only call your name and department once. If you miss me, check your employee portal within the next 15 minutes. If you mess that up, then I don’t know what to tell you. Get a job somewhere else. Preferably someplace you don’t have to pay attention.” And just like that, he started, “Anderson, Gnome Relations.”

Mason made a face at the harshness of it all. It wasn’t like they were D-class who couldn’t be trusted. But as soon as the thought crossed his mind, the image of the D-class choking on his own blood forced itself forward, and he got a sinking feeling in his stomach. He put his phone back in his pocket and just stood there, waiting with his own thoughts. Then, he was called, “Pines, Special Projects!”

Now, that got Mason’s attention. He knew that there was some sort of project here being worked on, as the woman he had been speaking to had been called to special projects too, but he hadn’t been told about anything specific he was working on. Only that he was now a general researcher. Either way, he went up to the HR rep and grabbed his assignment sheet. There it was, clear as day, special project headed by Dr. Jack Bright. Lab number 586. But he still wondered what this project was about. With there being only one way to find out, he headed to lab 586 as fast as he could.

When he arrived, he found that he was the last one there. He also noticed that, with the exception of a dark-haired man wearing an amulet, he had seen everyone else in the staff room, but it was only the young woman who had talked to him.

It was Dr. Bright, for who else would be wearing that amulet, who greeted him first. “Ah, there’s the man of the hour. It’s good to meet you, Dr. Pines.” He shook Mason’s hand.

Dr. Bright then looked to the other researchers, “Ok, now that everyone’s here, let’s establish our specialties.”

Mason looked to the other researchers, two women, and one man. The middle-aged woman spoke first, “Lucia Gonzalez, specialist in magical barriers.”

The man spoke next, “Peter Cheng, cryptozoologist.”

And lastly, “Katie Benson, forcefield engineer.”

And Mason finally added, “Mason Pines, specialty in general anomalies.”

Dr. Bright corrected him, “Actually, that’s not why you’re here.”

“Huh?”

“You’re here because you’re our leading most expert in SCP-[REDACTED].”

“Wait, really?”

Bright nodded, “Of course. None of the other researchers here are locals and everyone who was there during; what’d you call it in your research? Weirdmaggedon? Transferred out, retired, or quit. So that leaves you.”

“Oh, huh.” Mason had a realization about their group. A cryptozoologist, an engineer, and a specialist in magical barriers. “I’m guessing our work has to do with the containment barrier.”

“Exactly!” Bright then addressed the team as a whole. “Ladies and gentleman, we are trying to replicate the barrier that prevents escape from this site. This will make containment breaches a nigh impossibility.”

While Dr. Gonzalez and Dr. Chen looked impressed and Katie looked like she’d been told she was going to be crowned queen of the elves and worshipped for all her days, Mason had a question. “Um, Dr. Bright, not to be rude or anything but I already see a problem. The barrier isn’t exactly picky. If we make one, anomalous staff won’t be able to leave the site.”

“And that’s why this is a research project and not a building project. Part of our job here is figuring out how to make it selective. Good thinking though.”

Mason could certainly understand that. Magic barriers like the one around Gravity Falls were feasible, if finicky, and forcefields were practically child’s play in this line of work. A selective magical barrier that could be activated at any site? That would be quite a feat. And it seemed his colleagues agreed, as Katie piped up, “Where do we start?”

“We need to review literature and footage first. I have the physical files over there,” he pointed to a box on one of the tables, “and video footage should have been sent to your secure portal by now. Don’t hesitate to tell me if we need anything else.”

Mason headed straight to the case files, taking out the first one he saw. He knew that coming to Gravity Falls would be the change of pace he needed. And would you look at that, the first file was labeled June 1st, 2012.

It was an incident in which a gnome seemingly attempted to build a tunnel under the town in order to leave for some unknown purpose. Apparently, the little guy tried for days before giving up. If he had to guess from the timeline though, he was probably heading out to look for a queen. Mason called out to Dr. Bright, who was looking over footage on his laptop and taking notes, “Hey, is there any way for me to edit these incident reports?”

Dr. Bright paused his video and told him, “You’re gonna have to put in a request in the foundation portal. But some of these aren’t on the staff wiki so you’ll have to retype them.”

“Damn,” he wrote down what he knew in his notes instead. He’d have to make that request later. But this report at least told him something. The barrier went below the town. “Do we know how deep the barrier goes?”

Dr. Hernandez looked up from her own file, “What do you mean deep?”

“A gnome tried to get out in the early 2010s by tunneling but couldn’t. File says he tried to use a drill made out of sticks, acorn bits, and unicorn horn shed. Obviously, it didn’t work but it means the barrier extends underground.”

Katie looked up, questioning, “Wait, acorn bits?”

She went unaddressed as Dipper went on to say, “The question is though, how far down does it go? And is there a floor like a fish tank?”

“Shit, you’re right,” Bright stopped watching his video entirely and went to the files, sorting through them, “Everyone, look through the files about the amber dinosaurs. It could be that the floor could be down the mineshaft.”

Dr. Chen began furiously typing at his laptop then, knowing exactly which file to access. “Hold on, I’ve got it. It’s under SCP-[REDACTED]-118. The mine goes to 1500 meters and there has never been digging from anomalies at the maximum depth, but that could be due to a lack of food.

Katie then pointed out, “Shouldn’t we start with the ship? I mean, it might be the source of the barrier, so it makes the most sense to start checking there.”

“That’s a good point. So that gives us two options for the initial study. Either we can go to the crash site or we can go see the bottom of the mineshaft.”

“Why not both,” asked Mason. “I mean, even if we can find a definitive answer at only one site, it can be worth checking to see the limits of the barrier at two different points.”

“Well, that settles it then. We’ve got some field trips to plan. I say we start with the crash site, rule out that possibility and maybe see if we can find any working equipment, especially anything that might be generating a barrier. Then we can test the mineshaft.”

Barely an hour in and Mason had already arranged two fieldtrips for this little project. As he smiled to himself, he thought that he was in for a good time.

~

Agent Mabel Pines was not having a good time. She was almost late to her shift after Baby escaped her house and had to be wrangled back inside. Then she was late when someone’s tractor got stuck in the middle of the road. On top of that, today was supposed to be boring. As a member of MTF team Mu-Alpha-Epsilon, which specialized in the maintenance of magical creatures, one would think Mabel would be spending all her time wrangling something but alas, that was not the case. Today was contraband day, meaning she would have to go through boxes and boxes of gnome hats and goblin claws and all manner of magical body parts both antique and contemporary. Check if it was the real thing or a forgery and report accordingly for further action. And she was supposed to do that all day. As she ran into the contraband room, wearing a sparkly blue sweater over a white work blouse and a black pencil skirt, she looked around to make sure no one noticed her lateness. Luckily, no one did so she set to it, looking through the closest box. Unicorn horns. Great.

Unicorn horns were always a huge pain in the ass. Their similarity to narwhal tusks made them hard to check visually. They weren’t allowed to bring headphones into the contraband room, so that made audio inspection a tedious option, especially since they had to be careful to not damage the horns. She already felt like she was developing brain fog. And then her superior walked over, and she sighed. “Look, Reg, I’m sorry for being late, it won’t happen again.”

“Actually, I didn’t notice you were late,” said Reg. “You’re needed in the field today. Dr. Clef wants your expertise for a project in the unicorn grove.”

Expertise? Mabel had never heard it called that before. However, any excuse was a good excuse to avoid contraband day. She stood up and told him, “Of course, I’ll go change into my tactical gear right now.” And with that, she dropped the unicorn horn she was inspecting and headed straight to her locker.

While tactical armor was meant to be stealthy in the dark, the conditions of Mabel’s contract allowed a certain level of customization that wasn’t available to other MTF agents. She of course had a small American flag patch as required for identification purposes, but her helmet was decorated with purple swirls like fog or smoke. On the straps of her uniform, she also had various charms and pins of pigs and cats, including a custom tabaxi charm she would vehemently deny was a tabaxi.

Mabel didn’t know many of the doctors, just because she wasn’t in contact with them very often. So the surprise on Clef’s face when he saw the state of her tactical gear was expected. “Agent Pines?”

Mabel took his hand and shook it, telling him, “Yep, and you must be Dr. Clef. Don’t mind all the knick-knacks, we’re not on a stealth mission, so they won’t be a bother. My great uncle Stanford says hello by the way. You might have met him when you were in the GOC?”

Clef looked at Reg and Reg said, “Special contract.”

“Ah, that explains the decals." He turned his attention back to Mabel and said, “I think I’ve met him, yes. Tell him I said hello back. But I have to know, your file said you’ve had experience with these unicorns. How'd you handle that as a little girl?”

“Oh, it was awful. These unicorns are complete jerks.”

Reg nodded, concurring, "I've never dealt with a unicorn who wasn't at least a little hostile."

"I can only imagine. Granted, I've never dealt with one outside of combat before." But then, it occurred to him, "You said this wasn't a stealth mission. How are we going to get the hair then?"

"I did say that, I'll explain on the way there. Later Reg." Mabel claimed the driver's seat, Celf taking the passenger seat while Reg stayed behind. Staying true to her word, Mabel explained the incident from 2012, not finishing the story until they reached the edge of the woods.

"So the plan is to basically beat some unicorns into submission?"

"No, no, I'm going to threaten some unicorns into submission. I won't start punching unless they refuse to help. And you can join if you want, Doc."

"Thanks?"

With that, the two went into the woods together. walking paths Mabel had walked a million times. When they reached the deepest part, Dr. Clef played a recording of the druid's chant from a tape and the grove opened up to them, revealing the great waterfall and an ever-present rainbow. The moment they stepped in, Agent Pines and Dr. Clef heard a whinny and the sound of hooves on grass. Before them stood a beautiful, powder blue unicorn, resplendent in the sun.

She then began to speak, "I am Celestabellebethabelle, the last of the unicorns. What brings you here, brave advent,-" She then recognized Mabel, "-oh, it's you again. What do you want?"

"Same thing as last time, lady, we need hair."

"Are you kidding me?" She stamped her hoof as she said it. "You beat me and my friends half to death, make off with my treasure, rip my hair out, and expect me to give you more? Just like that?"

"I figured you'd be less of a dillweed about it if anything."

Dr. Clef then stepped in, "Agent Pines, if I may." He then approached the unicorn, telling her, "Look, I understand your history with my colleague is tumultuous, to say the least, but it's important that we have unicorn hair. World ending importance."

"So you say, Doctor, but I can see that you are not pure of heart. Your soul lurches with the weight of your sins and your lecherous nature. Why should I trust you?"

"That's not gonna work on him. Look, we just need it for a barrier and we're not leaving without it. Now, I can either just give you a haircut and go or we can fight again. It's up to you, just keep in mind that I'm a grown adult now."

Now, Celestabellebethabelle was cruel, she was unkind, a poor excuse for a unicorn, an already very arrogant species, but she wasn't stupid. It would be very easy for Mabel, who had only grown stronger with age and was in her prime, to beat her again. She also had a weapon this time and unicorns were not so endangered that her presence would be missed. She could see it now, her hair used for that barrier, her blood made into potions of youth, her hooves boiled down into magical glue, her horn made into an undying MP3 player. With little choice, she thus lay down on her legs, telling Mabel, "Fine you can take my hair. If you yank, I'll gore you. And don't let him touch me, I don't want some freak giving me a bad haircut."

Clef made a face at that but Mabel paid it no mind as she told the unicorn, "Don't worry, I won't give you a bad haircut."

She took a pair of scissors out of Clef's bag as well as some plastic garbage bags and knelt down to cut. She knew it would be harder to keep her promise with dry hair but she didn't let that deter her. Dr. Clef said they needed lots of the stuff, so she took five inches of the unicorn's mane, the proud beast huffing and muttering the whole time. At one point, she told Mabel, "You know there really was a time when we could sense if someone was pure of heart."

"Yeah, I've heard."

"Do you know why we lost that ability?"

"I'm guessing it's because you started lying to little girls." Mabel closed her scissors rather audibly at that.

"No, it's because we stopped being approached. Magic is use it or lose it and when humans don't care about being pure of heart, why use it? What I'm saying is that it was basically your own fault that I was mean to you."

Mabel then held the scissors to the very root of the unicorn's fine hair, "Oh no, looks like my hand slipped." She then cut off a lock of hair and added it to the already copious pile.

Celestabellabethabelle screamed in fright, "Alright! I'm sorry that I was a bitch!"

Mabel then went back to giving a normal haircut, "You sure were."

She then finished up, wrapping the unicorn hair in itself as neatly as she could and putting it into the bags. As soon as Mabel let go, the unicorn ran to check her mane in the lake. It was certainly a lot shorter but that wasn't a bad thing. She looked as fashionable as any dressage horse. She couldn't even see where Mabel had cut off a whole lock. "This is acceptable. Now get out."

"Wouldn't have it any other way." With that, she and Clef left the grove. The walk back was slower with each of them holding a bag of unicorn hair. Not one to let the opportunity for conversation to slip by, Mabel told Clef, "Sorry she called you a freak."

"It's alright, I've been called worse and sometimes even deserved it."

"She's not very creative."

"You know, I haven't read up on the old unicorn files, was there ever a time they could read someone's heart?"

"Nah, they couldn't. I just wanted to see where she was going with that. You never really know how they'll react when they're caught in a lie, so it's best to keep them talking until you can turn it around on them."

"Well, that's quite a strategy, I suppose that's why Agent Grey recommended you."

"Maybe, but it's probably just because I know the place best." She looked at his bag and a thought occurred to her, "So, I know what unicorn hair is used for and that I'm not supposed to ask for specifics but do you mind telling a lady if the reason for doing this is classified?"

"Oh no, I can share some details. We have an object being brought in from another site. It is imperative that we not only bring it but that it's as safe as possible. It's alive and non hostile and I'll leave it at that."

"The non-hostile part is doing a lot of heavy lifting there."

"Maybe so, but that's still a lot of possibilities."

"You got me there." She then looked at her watch. That haircut had taken longer than she thought it would. "Well, it's lunchtime. Do you want to join me?"

"Oh, no thanks. I need to get started on the barrier right away. You can drop me off back at the site."

Mabel shrugged, "Suit yourself. Just remember to eat, Doc."

"Thank you for the concern, I'll be fine though."

With that, they got back to base and the day went on as normal. Or as normal as any day could be. Honestly, anything was better than sorting through contraband. When she left, she didn't go home. Not straight away at least. She first went to Dipper's apartment, walking straight in, "Dipper, you won't believe the- what are you doing?"

Dipper was standing over his tank with a fishbowl in one hand and a net in the other submerged and cornering the terrified axolotl that was Bill. Dipper must have been at it since he got home from work, as he was still wearing a lab coat.

Bill used Dipper's surprise as an excuse to swim into his hide, Dipper explaining. "I needed to feed him and my fish and don't trust him. That can wait though, what's up?"

"I had a very interesting day is what happened. They're building an anti-possession field."

"What?" Bill and Dipper said this in unison, the axolotl sticking his head out of his Aztec pyramid. Only Dipper heard the former demon's wary tone, ignoring it in favor of his own curiosity. "Did they say what it was for?"

"Dr. Clef said they were transporting someone or something friendly to the Gravity Falls site and wasn't at liberty to say anymore, but I think the fact that it's friendly says enough."

"What do you think it is?"

"I think it's SCP-166."

"I kind of doubt that. She's not exactly easy to move. You need to remember I worked at site 19 longer than you. I passed her room a million times and that thing is like a vault. Plus, we've both read her file. They'd have to move her Oregon Trail style. Besides, are you even at liberty to openly discuss this with me?"

"It's not classified if it's just speculation and he gave me those details at least. Besides, who else could it be?"

"I don't know but think of it this way, has she ever been at risk of possession before?"

"He's got a point, shooting star. Say what you will about nuns, they can teach a girl a thing or two about mental fortitude."

"See, even Bill agrees with me."

"Are you seriously listening to Bill right now?"

"No, I just know I'm right. Anyways, is that the only reason you're here?"

"A little, but I also wanted to see how your first day was."

"Oh, it was great, I'm working on a project. Details are classified though."

Mabel groaned, "Seriously? Classified on your first day?"

"Yeah, on my first day." He went back to trying to catch Bill, telling Mabel, "All I can say is that it's incredibly important and that there's a reason I'm in Gravity Falls for it."

Mabek huffed but then, she got an idea, "Do you want to play D, D, and more D tomorrow?"

Dipper had finally gotten the screaming and squirming axolotl into the bowl at that point. He looked at Mabel, regarding her carefully before asking, "One-off or campaign?"

"One-off, you're the DM."

"Deal."

"What?" Bill stuck his head out of the bowl as he asked this, truly confused now. He didn't even pay attention to the delicious blood worms Dipper dropped into the bowl. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"That's a need-to-know basis and you don't need to know."

"Oh, come on!"

[rubydracogirl]

Siren's Treasure

Mermay/Gravity Falls story

Siren!OcXFord Pines and Stan Pines

Rated M just in case. This chapter isn't spicy but later parts probably will be

Part one is here if you missed it

Chapter 2

Shells

Stan was starting to get pissed off as he hauled back another empty line with his bait completely gone.

“Not again!” He hissed as he reset his hook with fresh bait. As he tossed the new line into the water, he settled in his chair, watching closely. He’d be damned if he lost another fish to whatever was taking it.

He’d always enjoyed ocean fishing, though it was certainly a different beast from fishing in the lake in Gravity Falls. 

Often, he had better luck catching fish off the boat then he ever did at that stupid lake-

His rod jerked slightly and he sat up, peering into the water as he pulled back, trying to hook whatever had grabbed onto the bait.

“C’mon, come to papa-” He chuckled as his rod jerked, a sign that he'd caught whatever was there. He let the line go, his excitement growing.

The line went slack, and he began to reel again, only for the fish to fight him, more spirited than ever.

This went on for longer than he would have liked. Sweat beaded on his brow, and he found himself bracing against the side of the boat.

“Ford!” He shouted as he nearly went over the rail. He braced himself and pulled back hard-

All at once, the line went completely slack and he went bowling over, nearly head over heels. 

Luckily for him, Ford broke his fall. Unluckily for them both, the deck broke their collective fall.

“Holy Moses,” Stan groaned, cursing colorfully under his breath as Ford helped him back to his feet. 

“What the-” Stan took a confused look at the end of his line. Attached to the hook was a giant, conical shell. It was a deep, golden brown color with creamy white dots scattered over its glossy surface.. 

“How the devil did you manage that?” Ford asked, impressed as he picked up the giant shell, untangling it from the hook.

“I dunno, I-”

Stan’s bewildered look became a scowl as they both heard a loud splash. Poking her head up from the water was the Siren. And in her mouth was a sizable fish-

“YOU DIRTY THIEF!” Stan shouted, shaking his fist at her as he lurched to the railing, “THAT’S MINE! GIVE IT BACK, YOU FISH FLOOZY!”

She only grinned, making a show of taking a huge bite out of the fish. Stan sputtered in rage, shouting at her as she chewed lazily, staring at him with an unimpressed expression before ducking down under the water.

“That overgrown tuna took my-”

“Stanley, do you know what kind of shell this is?” Ford interrupted.

“Should I?” Stan fumed as he glared at the water.

“It’s a Junonia shell, probably the biggest one I’ve ever seen…” 

“So?” 

Stan was still scowling at the water. The Siren poked her head back up, obviously chewing. He inhaled to yell at her some more, when Ford’s next words struck him.

“These are extremely rare. The biggest ones I’ve seen are less than five inches long and sell for a lot of money. This one’s damn near two feet long and in pristine condition-”

“How much?” Stan whipped around, taking another look at the shell.

“Smaller ones sell for something like fifty to eighty dollars last I was aware. I’m not an expert but I’d guess- hey!”

Stan snatched the shell, looking over it with renewed interest. 

“Just our luck there’s probably something in it-”

But the shell was completely empty.

“More than likely, she ate the creature inside.” Ford mused as he looked back at the water. “I thought perhaps she was following us to scavenge, but maybe not?”

The siren was back, peering at them with a grin. Stan coughed as he held up the shell for her to see.

“You keep bringing me shells like this, you can have any damn fish I hook that you want!” He shouted with a big grin.

She didn’t reply, but she didn’t look confused. Ford’s brow furrowed as he studied her. That had to be a sign she understood English, at least…

So why wasn’t she talking to them?

8~8~8~8~8~8~8~8~8~8~8~8~8

In the weeks that followed, Stan collected almost twenty different kinds of shells from the siren. Each time he reeled in his line, there’d be a new seashell waiting, each as rare and beautiful as the first.

Ford was deeply puzzled by the whole thing. The whole time she’d been following them, he had not once heard her sing or speak. The siren he had dated in Gravity Falls had been the exact opposite. She sang often and was a vociferous companion. Ford hadn’t minded; her being chatty was especially helpful for his research.

“Shelly’s late today,” Stan commented, watching his fishing line with pretended disinterest.

“Shelly?”

“Yeah. Y’know, the cute fish lady that’s been hanging around? Can’t keep calling her ‘the siren’. Sounds dumb.”

“Very creative,” Ford replied dryly.

“Alright, smartass, what would you call her?”

Ford took a moment to think, his eyes wandering over the waters before he shook his head.

“She most likely has a name already.”

“She’s not opening up about it if she does. Besides, Shelly’s not a bad nickname.”

Ford huffed in annoyance but reluctantly agreed.

“You’re right, it’s not a bad name.”

“Heh, damn straight.” Stan puffed his chest. “How much d’ya think I’ll get for these shells?”

“Probably depends on where you take them.” 

There was silence for a moment before Stan glanced at his twin. Ford was staring off into space, his brow furrowed.

“What’s eatin’ ya?”

Ford didn’t reply for a moment. The sounds of the water around them permeated the atmosphere as his thoughts percolated.

Stan glanced away and he brightened as he saw his fishing rod bending slightly.

He eagerly began to reel it in…but instead of a shell, there was actually a fish on the line.

Stan frowned for a moment before shrugging.

“I caught our dinner.”

They didn’t see her at all that day.

[octofalls-au]

Okay so in this AU I have the siren that Ford dated being Peso's grandparent, and having Ford reunite with said siren (not get back together) and I don't know if Ford becomes a surrogate grandfather figure or if they're just straight-up Pesos grandfather. The reason I'm on the fence is because I ship Peso with Kwazii ( and this ship will be in the AU) but I also have Calico Jack(Kwazii's grandfather) in a relationship with Stan. And I kind of think having your boyfriend's grandfather date your grandpa would be weird. But I still love the idea of Ford being a grandfatherly figure to Peso

Either way the Pine sea Peso and his family as family and vice versa

[thereareeyesinsidethetrees]

Bored, so here's a list of some of my favorite Gravity Falls fics, in no particular order. (Note: these are all about the Stan twins)

-per aspera by parsnipit (a collection of hurt/comfort. Each chapter has content warnings at the very start. Stan O War II era.)

-Sea Grunk Dump by Zeragii (I will admit, the title is a little misleading, as this is actually a oneshot. Hurt/comfort. Stan has a bad time with a wound caused by an anomaly. Stan O War II era)

-I Think I Saw You by Fordanoia (Ongoing fic with lots of angst. There is some violence. Summary: "Stan comes to Gravity Falls, but when Ford doesn’t show up he has to go looking for him. Amidst, a strange house and a mysterious presence he tries to figure out what exactly is going on and where Ford disappeared to." Bill betrayal era)

-The entire Salad Fruit AU series by Elisheva67 (Ford turns into a dragon. Sometimes. Stan is also there. Fluff, but also angst. Also, no Bill! Yay! Gravity Falls pre-Bill era. Cause. Again, no Bill.)

-Haul Away Bro by scribefindegil (Ford and Stan get trapped inside a crashed spaceship. Sea shanties save the day. Fluff. Stan O War II era)

-A Little Bit Lost by impish_nature (Feral! Ford AU. Ford's having a rough time and Stan helps him. Hurt/comfort. Post-portal era)

-Jump In Front of Trains All Day and Stay Alive by Voidfish (Ford has a rough time with his injuries and self-depricates. Stan tries to help. Hurt/comfort. Post-Weirdmaggedon era.)

-hide and seek by parsnipit (More Feral! Ford AU. Can you tell I like that one. Mostly Stan's POV. Hurt/comfort. Stan O War II era)

-Better Kept Secret by BadonKaDunk (Oh, wow, look, more Feral! Ford. Hurt/comfort. Both POVs! Stan won't stop harrassing Ford about his time in the portal. Then some other stuff happens. Stan O War II era.)

-Repercussions by impish_nature (Hurt/comfort. Stan has memory lapses. Explores an interesting possibility with Ford. Stan O War II era.)

-Þetta Reddast by GradboidFarmer (Pure fluff. Stan POV. He has a day. Also, Ford is sick. Stan O War II era.)

-Siren Song by azhdarchidaen (Ford has to save Stan from sirens. He's not affected by them because he's ace (aroace, but that's just me). Hurt/comfort? Idk. Stan O War II era)

Everything from untrustworthyglitch really, but specifically:

-none of those phds is an md, you dumb idiot (Hurt/comfort, more Feral! Ford. Ford has a translator, and it breaks. The translator is my favorite headcanon ever. Stan O War II era.)

-who even knows what holiday we're celebrating here (Hurt/comfort. Holiday times with the Pines. Also, Ford has a bad time. Stan doesn't have the best time either. Stan O War II era)

-old man world tour: california edition (hurt/comfort. Stan breaks his arm, so him and Ford head to California to visit the niblings. Stan O War II era.)

Anyway, reminder to read the fic tags for warnings! Because I am apparently very bad at writing good descriptions for these.

I decided not to include some fics because they were a bit too heavy or violent. Let me know if I should make a separate post for those.

I was also considering making a list of my least favorite fics, but I can only think of two.

Also, please feel free to recommend me fics! I'm always looking to grow my collection.

[haro0o]

continuing this thing!

there is a rift between each of the monsters based on their living situation.

for water-breather creatures, they all can buy this water canister in certain stores. it has suction cups that help it hold on to part of the body. the water will get through the sponge to the gills. Some creatures have special canister shapes that they can put on and adjust as they want.

This is also a vehicle that helps those who don't have legs or any limbs to walk on land. like a wheelchair.

Stan made his own from scraps and old part of his when he was homeless cause if he can’t run and hide quickly with it he WILL die.

This wheel will get more adjusted and advanced (but not much) as times goes after he lost Ford! Running for the gov? Easy! The cops? Easy!

[thicctails]

Under The Falls

(new AU?? we’ll see)

Lore dump under the cut

Sooooo this idea has been rattling around inside my brain for a bit, and now that I don’t feel like I’m going to keel over and die from the yearly Every Kid Ever Is Bringing Sickness Into The House season Ontario is experiencing, I’ve finally got some art done for it!

So, in this au, the Pines family aren’t humans, but a very rare subspecies of Merfolk/Sirens. They can’t lure sailors to their deaths with songs like sirens or swim nearly as fast as merfolk, but instead can use their magic to appear human. They must frequently rehydrate, but even that can be lessened with practice. The timeline has been fucked with here as well (Let’s pretend Shermie was older than Stanley and Stanford by, like, quite a bit, around 16-17 years maybe. Not outrageous, its around the same age gap I have to my younger sibling ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) so we get Mullet Stan and younger, more Feral Ford when the twins are born.

Now, adults of this species have mastery over their magic, but children do not. Therefore, the kids must stay in the water until they can control their magic enough to appear human enough to pass as normal. Well, one day, someone slips up and is seen by the wrong person, an enthusiastic monster hunter that would love to add some new additions to their collection...

...leaving two very little Pines to fend for themselves, at least until their Grunkles, who catch wind of the slaughter a day or two after it happened (people obviously knew the Pines family, so their disappearance raised alarm bells. Everyone assumes that the family was just doing cosplay or having an early Halloween party and some psycho murdered them. The only reason Dipper and Mabel weren’t discovered is because no one outside of the family knew they existed), put aside their issues to deal with this crisis situation. With Stanford so enthralled in his dangerous work and Stanley... well, Stanley’s situation is definitely not child-friendly, the two decide to co-exist to raise the twins. Stan converts part of Ford’s house into the Mystery Shack as a way to earn extra money, and as an excuse for the twin’s appearance as they age. What? Mermaid kids? Nah, just costumes for that wacky tourist trap.

Maybe Bill gets involved as well, intending to lead the kids astray, but ends up getting attached to the weird little meatbags lol. They’re an endless source of chaos and entertainment, and him hanging around them pisses Ford and Stanley off to no end, which delights him. 

[djcanipe99]

Dipper puts boxes on a dolly. He whistles. Grunkle Stan works at his desk]

Grunkle Stan :You know what the great thing about whistling is? It's that you can stop whistling!

Dipper : Oh. Sorry.

[not whistling, he puts another box on the dolly]

Grunkle Stan : Hey, bend at the knees or else I'll...

Dipper : Kick my ass, put your foot in my ass, make my ass a hat, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Grunkle Stan : Geez, and I didn't think you were listening. Oh, and I need you to re- sticker the clock radios. They're on sale.

Dipper : Yeah, I saw the flyer. I already took care of it.

Grunkle Stan : Really? Well, way to take initiative.

Dipper: "Way to take initiative... "? What are you up to?

Grunkle Stan : Nothing. I just think you did a good job.

Dipper: Okay. But I'm watching you.

Grunkle Stan : Stop being weird.

Dipper : Hey, Grunkle Stan, um, I was wondering if you could show me, like, a few fighting moves.

Grunkle Stan : Who you planning to fight?

Dipper: Robbie Valentino.

Manly Dan: ? Robbie Valentino He's got scoliosis and asthma.

[pause]

Manly Dan: You could take him.

Grunkle Stan: Oh, come on now, Dipper . Why don't you, uh, beat up Gideon? I don't work for his dad.

Dipper : He's making a move on Wendy.

Manly Dan : Oh, no. No. No.Wendy’s not going near that pretzel boy! No. No. You gotta nip this in the bud, Dipper.

Manly Dan: All right. All right. The bridge of the nose is very vulnerable.

Manly Dan : Oh. Oh! And hit him with a banjo!

Grunkle Stan: [pauses and stares atDan ] A banjo,Dan?

Manly Dan : What? I'm helping!

Grunkle Stan: Where's he gonna get a banjo?

Manly Dan : I don't know! But I saw a guy get hit with a banjo once, and he went down.

Grunkle Stan: [pauses and stares at Dan again] Hitting a guy with a banjo, is dirty.

[to Dipper ]

Grunkle Stan: You wanna knee him in the groin.

Manly Dan : You can hit him in the groin with a banjo.

Mabel:Grunkle Stan hates you.

Soos : Oh, don't be silly. Mr.pines loves me.

Mabel: You gave him a heart attack.

Dipper: Mable, maybe Grunkle Stan loved Soos so much that his heart just... exploded.

Thompson : [they're driving Valentino’s cousin's car] Why does Gideon have a statue of the Virgin Mary on his dashboard?

Robbie : Maybe he's, like, religious.

Dipper : Didn't Gideon get imprisoned for arson?

Robbie: Yeah. People who burn stuff believe in God too, Pines.

Dipper: Why does his key-chain say "I Love Bingo"?

Soos : Gideon must love bingo.

Thompson: All right. I'm starting to think this isn't Gideon’s car.

Robbie : Then who's car is it?

[police siren wails]

Dipper : Okay, I just want to tell you that this play will be done like always. That means that all of your ideas, while interesting, are stupid.

[to Mabel ]

Dipper: No unicorns.

[to Soos]

Dipper : No lifeguards.

[to wendy]

Dipper: No wise women.

[to Robbie ]

Dipper: No spacemen. Now, we need the wise men. Anybody got any suggestions.

[Robbie raises his hand]

Dipper: Robbie , I swear to god, if you say "Space Wisemen" I will kick you in the head.

[Robbie lowers his hand]

Durland:Which one of you is dipper pines?

Dipper: Oh, that's me.

Durland: Wait a second... is your great uncle Stanley Pines?

Dipper(nervously): Yes.

Dipper: You poor bastard!

Thompson : Gentlemen, we have finally done it. A pot leaf on the water tower!

Soos : This is the proudest moment of my life!

(Dipper looks the leaf over.)

Dipper : It doesn't look like a pot leaf.

Robbie : What?

Dipper : It looks like a hand giving the finger!

Robbie: Well, it doesn't have to look perfect, Pines! It's art!

Thompson: All right, how do you get the beer out?

Dipper : Through the tap.

Thompson : What tap?

Dipper: No!

[fandomcollector23]

Senior Pines twins, are you on a first-name basis with any cryptids? And if so, who?

Ford: Well kind of, I know Mermandos family from travel and a couple of sirens, but Stan won't let me hang out with them.

Stan: Because they try to drown me everytime! But I know the handwitch. Sadly.

[memelzebub]

[frost-flame]

Inspired by this post

Stan is the Holy Fish as seen with the halo and wings.

Ford has six arms with six fingers and six eyes. Four of the eyes are on his head surrounded by black mist. Once Ford makes the black mist disappears, so will the eyes. Extra arms are retractable. How? Magic

I know this design is completely different than the original au but I don't want to copy. And the idea is great!!