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Who's That Girl?
Chapter 5: We Stay Silent
All jokes aside, Wade had too much stuff to deal with. Keeping up his mask was way too hard.
logan howlett x reader
TW: language, D&W, panic attack, mental health issues.
A/N: chapter five is up!!! this one is directly connected to the previous chapter, it's basically the same chapter but from wade's pov, so please make sure you read Part 4 before reading this one!! Please don't be made at me I love wade so muchđâ
â this fic is inspired by the TV Show New Girl, Wade and Logan aren't Deadpool and Wolverine (no powers/mutant gene etc) but I did take most of their character traits and storyline!!
Masterlist / Previous Part
Wade woke up later than usual, sunlight already creeping through the blinds. His phone buzzed on the nightstand with a few missed notifications, but he didnât bother checking them right away. He stretched lazily, rubbing his face. The apartment was quiet, almost too quiet. Logan and Y/N had already left for work, probably hours ago. Good. He didn't think he was in the mood for any morning chit-chat for once.
After throwing on his running gear and grabbing a water bottle, Wade slipped out of the apartment and into the cool morning air. Heâd hit his usual routeâ nothing too long today. He wasnât up for pushing himself too hard.
He never liked running. He always wondered what part of running was actually satisfying for some people. It helped him clear his mind, gave him space to think, or better yet, not think at all. Maybe he had a toxic relationship with running. Maybe it worked like a drug on him. But he knew he would rather run until his legs give out rather than go down the same path he followed years ago. He knew better now.
The streets were familiar, and Wade let his feet carry him through the neighborhood without much thought. His mind wandered, as it often did, from jokes he was working on to what gig he had next to the weird thing Logan had said last night. Everything felt scattered, but that was normal. He was used to living with his thoughts bouncing around like a pinball machine. His mind felt like a computer with thousands of tabs opened.
But then, just as he rounded a corner near the park, Wade froze. Vanessa.
She was standing there, a few meters away, looking just like she used toâlike a ghost from a past life. She hadnât seen him yet, thank god. His heart slammed into his chest, panic rising as he quickly debated turning around and bolting. Too late.
âWade?â
Her voice caught him mid-step. He turned, awkwardly waving like an idiot.
âVanessa, hey!â Wadeâs voice came out higher than he wanted, and the grin he plastered on his face felt all wrong.
Vanessa smiled, her eyes crinkling at the corners, looking genuinely happy to see him. âI knew that was you. Howâve you been?â
Wadeâs brain scrambled for something, anything to say. How have I been? That was a fucking big question. How do you explain six years of missing someone without falling apart? He ran a hand through his hair, nervously glancing at his shoes.
âOh, you know⌠same old, same old.â He tried to laugh it off, but his voice cracked.
She didnât seem to notice his internal chaos. âItâs been so long, huh? We should catch up sometime, what do you think?â
He wanted to run. Run so fast he could break his legs and never even feel it. Catch up? What does that even mean? How do you catch up with someone youâve been in love with since forever even after you both decided that being friends would be better, and bla bla bla, why was he thinking about this again?
He did his best at hiding his internal panic and forced himself to stay still, nodding like an idiot.
âYeah, totally! That would be great.â He was still smiling like a maniac, but inside, every alarm bell was going off. Abort. Abort. Abort.
Vanessa seemed pleased with that answer, though. âGreat! Iâll text you.â
âYeah! See ya around, V,â Wade blurted before turning on his heel and jogging away as fast as he could without looking completely insane. He could feel her eyes on him as he sprinted, and he didnât stop until he was several blocks away, breathing hard.
âGood job, Wade. You fuckinâ idiot,â he muttered to himself, wiping sweat from his forehead. His chest felt tight, but it wasnât from the run. It was that familiar pressure building inside him, the one he tried so hard to ignore. The feeling of not being able to handle any of it.
âââ
Wade stood outside Blind Alâs door, debating whether to knock or not. He hadnât seen her in a while, but she had been a constant in his life during the toughest times. Before Logan. Before everything fell apart.
He knocked, and her voice came through the door, as sharp as ever. âTook you long enough to visit, jackass.â
Wade smiled despite himself, pushing the door open. âMiss me, Al?â
âNot in the slightest,â she quipped. Wade knew she couldnât see, but the way she was standing in front of him made it look like she was staring right through him, âSomethingâs going on with you. Spill it.â
Wade plopped down on her couch, letting out a dramatic sigh. âRan into Vanessa.â
Blind Al didnât react. She just sat back in her chair. âThat so? And you didnât completely lose your shit?â
Wade snorted. âDefine âcompletely.â I told her weâd catch up, and then I ran away like a coward. Does that count?â
âYeah, that counts,â Al said, her voice gruff but understanding. âSo what now?â
âI donât know.â Wade rubbed his temples. âShe seemed happy, like genuinely happy to see me, and I just⌠I donât know what to do with that.â
âYou donât have to do anything,â Al said bluntly. âSheâs part of your past, and thatâs fine. Doesnât mean you have to dive back into that mess.â
âYeah, but what ifâŚâ Wade trailed off, staring at the ceiling. He wasnât even sure what he was asking.
âLook, youâve got your life now. Youâve got Logan, and now this new girl, Y/N, right? Stick to whatâs real. Donât go chasing ghosts.â Alâs voice softened slightly, and Wade felt a pang of gratitude for her, "Or go for it. Just, donât think about it too much. Let things go their own way." she added.
Easier said than done, but duly noted.
Suddenly, she got up from her chair and walked towards her kitchen. Wade watched her come back with a cup of not-at-all full of alcohol coffee and settle back in her chair.
"So, you didnât tell me about that new roommateâŚ"
He stayed with her for lunch and then they talked all afternoon. He told her everything she had to know about Y/N, and how Logan was doing, too. But still, he couldnât shake the thought of what had happened that morning. Vanessa. Al was always right, but the pressure in his chest still hadnât gone away. It wasnât just Vanessa. It was everything.Â
âââ
By the time Wade got back to the apartment building, the weight in his chest had doubled. He made a turn into an alleyway, the walls suddenly feeling too close. His breath came in shallow gasps, and his hands started to shake.
No no no no no, not now. Not here.
He pressed himself into the corner, knees pulling up to his chest as he tried to get control, but it wasnât working. He felt like he was drowning, like the air was being sucked out of the alley. Everything was overwhelming.
Breathe, Wade. Just fucking breathe.
He fumbled for his phone and dialed his therapistâs number. He knew she had given him her personal phone number just for emergencies but maybe, maybe this time, it was an emergency. He needed it. Because breathing wasnât working. After a few agonizing rings, she picked up.
âWade? Whatâs going on?â
He could barely get the words out, his voice shaking. âIâŚI câcanât Âť
âOkay, okay,â she said calmly. âYouâre going to be fine. You know the drill. Slow your breathing.â
Wade tried, focusing on her voice. After what felt like hours, his breathing steadied, but the tightness in his chest remained.
"Are you feeling better?" she asked and Wade had no idea what to answer. Air was back in his lungs, yes. But that was it.
"Iâm losing it. I donât know what to do." He waited a few seconds for his therapist to answer. When she didnât, he continued. "Iâm lost. I canât make a choice. I feel like a fuckinâ loser and I donât know why people are still keeping up with me. And I called you, god, Iâm so sorry, I know itâs supposed to be for emergencies onlyâ"
She interrupted him, "Wade, this was an emergency."
Wade shook his head and he watched his free hand for a few seconds, it was shaking like crazy. He didnât say anything for a while. "Can we have a session soon?"
âOf course, Wade. Can you get to someone, right now? A friend?â
âLogan,â Wade muttered. âI could go see Logan.â
âGood. Do that. Youâve got people, Wade. Lean on them.â
Wade nodded, even though she couldnât see him. âYeah⌠yeah, Iâll go see Logan.â
He hung up and dragged himself to his feet, wiping at his face. Get it together, Wade.
âââ
Loganâs classroom was quiet when Wade arrived, a rare moment of calm at the end of a long day. The coffee shop near the center was still open, so Wade grabbed a box of donuts and two coffees before heading over. Showing up unannounced wasnât unusual for himâLogan never seemed to mind (he didâ Wade chose to ignore it). Besides, the guy could use a donut break anyway.
But as Wade neared the door, that familiar tightness crept back into his chest. Loganâs gonna see right through me. He paused, forcing down the rising anxiety, plastering on his usual grin before pushing the door open.
âHey, I come bearing gifts. You looked like you could use a sugar rush.â
Logan frowned as soon as he saw him. âYou okay?â
I hate him so much.
Wade waved him off, doing his best to sound casual. âMe? Of course! Iâm always okay. Whatâre you talking about?â
Logan didnât press further, but Wade could feel his friend's eyes lingering on him, studying him like he could sense the tension beneath the surface. He wasnât sure if he wanted Logan to ask again or not. Wade kept talking, cracking jokes, doing his usual routine, but something in Loganâs steady silence made it harder to maintain.
They sat together, sipping coffee and biting into donuts, the atmosphere light but heavy at the same time. He knew Logan saw through him. He always did. But Logan didnât push, and for that, Wade was grateful.
As they left the center together, Wade kept the conversation rolling, letting his words spill out faster than usual, a habit heâd sharpened over the years. Keep talking, keep things light, and maybe Logan wouldnât dig deeper.
â...and I swear, man, if this one guy hadnât backed off, I wouldâveââ
âYou sure youâre okay?â Loganâs voice cut through Wadeâs ramble, and oh my god, was he using a gentle tone on me?
The question sent a jolt of panic through Wade. He felt the familiar tightening in his chest again, the pressure pushing against the cracks. Not now. Not here.
He immediately forced a laugh, one that felt too loud in his ears, like he wasnât the one laughing . âOf course! Stop worrying about me, peanut. Youâve got your own crap to deal with. Speaking of which,â Wade added quickly, redirecting the conversation towards something he knew Logan wouldnât press on, âhowâs it going with Y/N, huh? Been hanging out together without me, yet?â
Logan rolled his eyes, but Wade didnât miss the shift in his expression. He knew Logan had caught the distraction, knew the guy could read him like an open book. But Logan didnât push, not yet.
âSheâs our roommate, Wade,â Logan said.
Wade threw him a wink, keeping up the act. âSure, sure. Got it.â
Logan let it slide, like Wade knew he would. He always did. Pushing Wade for answers never worked. Logan had learned that a long time ago. Heâll ask again later, Wade thought, the weight of it settling somewhere deep inside him. But for now, at least, Logan let it go.
Wade kept talking, kept deflecting, but even as his voice filled the air, he could feel Loganâs gaze on him, steady, waiting. Logan would be there when the time came, ready to listen. Wade knew that. He always knew that.
But right now? Wade wasnât ready. Not yet. So he smiled, cracked another joke, and pushed the feeling down a little further.
Maybe later.
XXX
#fanfiction#fandom#ao3#logan howlett x reader#deadpool and wolverine#marvel cinematic universe#logan howlett#hugh jackman x reader#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett imagine#xmen fanfiction#xmen x reader#wade wilson#deadpool 3#deadpool movies#deadpool#fanfic#wolverine fanfiction#deadpool fanfiction
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What do you think of the Bj and Lydia controversy due to age?
You know, the short answer I have for this is that I do not think it should be an issue that's even brought up anymore. Lydia is now an adult woman in her 50s; plenty of people end up with a partner who is 10+ years older than them, meaning that they would have been a full adult if they would have come across their partner at sixteen. And that's just speaking about the real world; let's not forget Beetlejuice and the characters in that world are all a work of fiction. I don't think the fact that they met when she was a teenager all those years ago should even be an issue to ship it or not. As a matter of fact, people can ship whatever they want. They can even ship it in the first film and it's not an issue... Shipping in itself is inherently innocent. These characters and the situations around them don't even exist, and therefore, whatever you imagine with them, has no effect in the real world. Shipping is no different from a kid grabbing a couple of dolls and making them kiss. It's all in good fun.
Let me tell you, I had written a long freaking essay under this question đ
, but I decided to leave all of that for a separate post. But a few notable points from that essay which I think would be good to include here are the following.
Back in the 90s and early 2000s we had ships with pretty big age gaps on network TV and nobody batted an eye about the age gap (as far as I'm concerned). I'm talking about Buffy the Vampire Slayer specifically in this post. This was before social media, but as far as magazines and fandom spaces go, I'm sure the discussions around Buffy's love interests in BTVS centered around which hot vampire was better for Buffy, Angel or Spike. (Even nowadays we see this kind of article, exhibit A). And you don't see these articles starting with disclaimers and trigger warnings, either.
For those who haven't watched BTVS, Angel was around 240-something when he slept with 17 year old Buffy. He slept with her the night she turned 17, by the way; they were already together while she was 16. At the time he was turned into a vampire, Angel was around 26 years old. Angel met Buffy when she was 16, but he was stalking watching Buffy since she was 15:
youtube
Now about Spike. Spike met Buffy when she was 16, but he didn't actually become obsessed with her until she was around 20. Still, they got together and it wasn't ever an issue that he met her when she was a teenager. In Spike's case, he did stick around and interacted with Buffy multiple times before they started dating. In Betelgeuse's case, we know that while he watched Lydia from afar, he never actually managed to interact or even be seen by her during the years they were apart.
A lot of antis throw around the word "grooming" around Beetlebabes; I don't think they understand the meaning of that word. To put it simple, to groom someone is to condition them and emotionally manipulate them for years into a certain behavior, in this context, into falling in love or becoming sexually involved with the groomer. This term, therefore, cannot and will not ever apply to Betelgeuse and Lydia's relationship (it also does not apply to Spuffy, while we're at it). How can it? When they only had a few interactions over 30+ years ago and only met now after all that time.
And about those interactions in the first movie, the fact that Betelgeuse attempted to marry Lydia is attached to an idea of sexual inappropriateness only when that particular idea is projected onto what actually happened in that scene. Objectively, for Betelgeuse, marrying Lydia was a means to an end; there was no sexual or romantic implications in their marriage in that movie.
I believe in the case of Betelgeuse x Lydia versus ships like Buffy x Angel or Buffy x Spike, people are quick to see an issue in one where they never notice an issue in the other for the following reason: While Angel and Spike are hot, young-looking vampires, Betelgeuse is gross and does look like a dead guy. That is literally the difference. Spike and Angel are good-looking hotties; Betelgeuse... I love him lots and he is hot for me, but he is not conventionally attractive. I bet you if Betelgeuse looked like Michael Keaton did playing Bruce Wayne... People wouldn't have an issue that he's lusting after 50-something year old Winona Ryder, (also a hottie herself btw).
Let's add here before I close off this post that both Angel and Spike did objectively horrible things to Buffy when they were soulless (Angel while Buffy was still a minor), and meanwhile Betelgeuse has never harmed Lydia (no, the insta-pregnancy didn't harm her; everything that happened in that scene was an illusion). He didn't even behave inappropriately toward her in the first film when he was wilder and hornier than he is now. And yet shipping Bangel or Spuffy (last I checked lol) isn't widely seen as problematic. I ship Spuffy to the moon and back, and used to ship Bangel as well at some point đ¤ˇđťââď¸ and I haven't seen people attacking shippers nor have I seen discussions of these ships being inappropriate (though I'm sure there must be... it's 2024 and the purity culture fandom infection has spread widely), not in the way I see Beetlebabes fans being harassed.
Anyway, I wrote a separate post about this and will post it eventually. This wasn't meant to be this long, but here we are đ
.
#Beetlebabes#anons#anon#anon questions#answers#beetlejuice x Lydia#beetlejuice#Betelgeuse x Lydia#beetlejuice beetlejuice#beetlejuice meta#beetlebabes meta#things i write#in which I'm rambling about Beetlejuice again#Sorry I write such long posts all the time đ
#long post#long post for ts#fandom discourse#just in case
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THE PEOPLE HAVE DECIDED... THE WINNER IS ; SHINING STAR AU
Don't worry the other AUs will get another chance in the future after we finish the superhero AU (if it has an ending of course but it'd be fun if it didn't ehe) and Shining Star ! Here's a little summary for each AU (including winning AU) ; Fates Intertwined - An AU where SEKAI didn't exist and everything happened naturally... Sort of like a slowburn? esque Alternate universe, It's a bit fleshed out but I'm still working on everything. To keep it simple, this AU is basically where each character isn't going through so much trauma and instead knows how to deal with that trauma that happened in canon with the help of the people they know and cherish, let's take An or Mizuki for example... When An found out about Nagi's death she still did feel sad (and guilty for not being able to say goodbye) and "traumatized" but VBS, instead of checking up on her once actually comforts her, like a lot (including Akito) and encouraged her to keep fighting for what she wants to achieve and keep on reaching for that shared dream. Basically reassuring her (she also has less attachment and abandonment issues... Kanamod and Modshishi knows like almost everything about this AU), while Mizuki despite having to go through Mizu5 again faces Ena this time, not running away or isolating, actually facing Ena. And Ena in return wanted Mizuki to tell her the secret herself because she didn't want to believe in people she doesn't know well, especially if the people were transphobic. uh yeah basically Project Sekai AU ; Everyone's untraumatized (THIS IS SO LONG I'M SO SORRY) Daydreams ; Actually one of my least doomed AUs, it's basically where Minori, An, Mizuki, Mafuyu, Saki, Ichika and Emu daydreams a lot... indulging in a world full of lies, living a life full of lies thinking everything is still the same. Because you see in this AU every unit disbanded because of a big issue they had. For More More Jump! They had a disagreement, Shizuku and Haruka were mostly the ones arguing but Airi also joined in to defend Shizuku... Minori witnessed all of this and basically after hearing Haruka say "I WISH I NEVER WENT ON THE ROOFTOP AND MET YOU ALL!" Minori's head basically clicked, memories flashed before her and she basically hyperventilated and ran away. Haruka realized what she'd done but it was too late, so Airi and Shizuku left. Shizuku isolated herself, Airi tries to keep in touch and well let's just say Minori's depressed and keeps daydreaming which really makes her mentally unhealthy. Haruka knows of Minori's state but she's too scared to do or say anything, she thinks it's all her fault and well you can figure out the rest here haha I just used MMJ as an example since that's the one I first worked on. part 2 will be posted hold on
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other people have probably already said this but like. it's been a shockingly nice experience to watch the dungeon meshi fandom go absolutely NUTS over falin. just this unbelievable wellspring of thirsty romantic eye for her, and not only is she chubby in canon, most of the fanart i've seen has skewed towards drawing her even chubbier? i... genuinely do not think i've ever seen that before. i don't think i've ever been in an anime fandom where someone both looks like me and is the subject of such enthusiastic adoration BECAUSE she's fat before.
it's... it's really nice.
#dungeon meshi#falin touden#i've come a long way on my own body image issues since i was a teenager and miserable about it#some of it was gender stuff some of it was style stuff but a lot of it was just#the pervasive sense of every clothing store loudly implying 'you are ONLY BARELY thin enough to be worth catering to'#growing up in the 2000s the beauty standard was 'painfully skinny'#phasing towards that sort of skinny-fit toned look#i never got close to hitting either of them#i'm short and stocky with big thighs and a thick waist and a soft belly and a chest to match#there's solid working muscle under there - i've been doing farm labor or construction labor since i was fifteen - but it's covered with fat#and i don't think i've ever seen an anime character who looks like me before#maybe i have if i think REALLY really hard#but i'm pretty sure i haven't#but here's falin and people draw her broad and thick the way i am in a way that's just. BLATANTLY appreciative of her#SPECIFICALLY **BECAUSE** SHE'S FAT??#i hope people keep doing that#this is a new experience for me#... i like it a lot#posts by cwaf
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I am liking Jujutsu Kaisen, way more than I imagined I would, but I foresee it will let me down and it's keeping me from enjoying this as much as I could haha
I think the characters and dynamics are well set, and I think many of them have an incredibly good and deep potential, but I would be willing to bet they'll not get a proper development, enough for them to really hit. A well assembled set of gears is not enough to make the movement go, you have to wind the clockwork.
I think Gojo and Megumi have a fascinating and very complex dynamic, but I doubt it will be given the time and care that imo it needs to actually work. And it is going well enough for now! One could see the intimacy between them was deeper than the one Gojo had with, say, Yuji and Nobara ever since the very first few episodes despite the fact Fushiguro too was a first year. But the pieces forming what they have are extremely complex, and it just wouldn't be realistic if it doesn't show, even if in a not showing way, or if it doesn't have consequences or implications.
It's one of those dynamics that shape one's life, the way one regards the world, the way one establishes or not relationships with other people. It's one of those dynamics that could be full of fondness, gratitude, resentment, admiration, trust, and that imply intimacy, the good kind or the bad, even if in just the knowledge of someone who's been a constant through your life. It could, and would, imply a myriad of feelings, and probably in such a mix it could imply contradictory feelings too. Even the nothingness would weight, even the nothingness would be significant and meaningful.
Gojo took Megumi and his sister under his wing, the son of a man who murdered him, because of both selfish and selfless reasons. Megumi looks like Toji. What does Gojo feel about this? How does Gojo deal with this? How does Gojo go about taking care of Megumi? Would he walk him to school? Make him breakfast? Celebrate his birthdays making him blow candles? Did he take him to the zoo? Does the relationship between them feel professional or is it something more? Gojo appreciates his students, but is Megumi to him just another student? When Gojo faces Sukuna in Megumi's body, did he see the kid he raised, or does he just see Sukuna in one of his students' body? Did he have one faint wavering instant? And how does Megumi feel about this? Is he resentful of him? Resentful of the situation? Of the selfishness behind his actions? Does he feel like a pawn? Is he grateful? Does he resent feeling grateful? Would he rather not? Does he love Gojo? Does he feel nothing about him other than what he could feel about a teacher that sort of annoys him but knows he's reliable in his strength? Does he think it unfair, cruel or unfeeling that Gojo is close, closer perhaps, with Yuuji or Yuta, considering their story? When Sukuna slices Gojo in two, does the remnants of Megumi's soul tremble?
And not just Megumi and Gojo. Yuuji and Nanami, Gojo and Nanami, Yuuji and Fushiguro, Nobara and the boys, or Nobara and Maki, Todo and Yuuji or Yuta, Gojo and Yuta, Megumi and his sister. Gojo and Geto, even! If the pieces are well set, the dynamics are intriguing, interesting, and have potential to be deep, but then the characters have like two plot relevant scenes that punch you hard, but little more, it's not nearly enough. Especially not nearly enough for the enormity that is shonen dynamics and situations. And the potential existing at all, and then not delivering, makes it all the more frustrating when you're left with something mediocre that could have been so good.
The development of dynamics through not only a few plot relevant gut wrenching moving scenes, but also the smallness of life, is important. The friend who recommended this to me said that those things were just unnecessary filler, but I disagree. I think there's a big difference between a large amount of anime-only filler episodes whose existence is based on the fact they had run out of manga chapters to animate, and moments of quietness. The low stakes character-driven moments of quietness can be so telling and so insightful, and they are so satisfactory when brought back later in higher stakes situations. My friend teased me there was no scene of Gojo making breakfast to Megumi, that it would be an idiotic idea, but it would be so telling. How he makes breakfast, what they eat, if he tries hard or if it's all mechanised, if they have personal bowls or if they use whatever, if he just buys them some pastry on the way to school, if the way they have breakfast changes through the years, or if he doesn't make them breakfast at all! All that would be very insightful on their dynamic and its evolution. All that would give a glimpse on how they regard each other and why, even in the present. All that could become meaningful in tense situations and high stakes scenes.
These moments also let the plot breath; if a lot is happening all the time, if every character is always experiencing trauma after trauma, the entire story is so emotionally draining that at some point you don't even care all that much. Besides, these nothing moments or low stakes plot arcs, besides deepening and developing dynamics, also let some in-world time pass, which would make the intimacy and bond between characters more believable imo; between Yuuji eating Sukuna's finger and their last confrontation in December how much time has passed? A few months? Am I truly to believe these characters are so everything to each other in only a few months?
Without some smallness, some repetition, some daily life, some low stakes not plot-centric development, the dynamics don't hit, they don't truly feel fleshed out, and dynamics as complex as the ones Megumi and Gojo have, or as supposedly meaningful as the one Megumi has with Yuuji or his sister, should be fleshed out if they're going to exist at all. Otherwise they'd risk making the writing feel awkward and fake. Besides, if the dynamics felt well fleshed out and realistic, they would shape the way the characters interact and act, and how they deal with situations, thus being plot relevant.
The shonen genre has so much happening all the time, the stakes are so high, the dynamics are so rooted in big events and the relationships carry enormous weight and implications. Yet they barely get developed, and it feels so stupid, so plain, the absence of something so important noticeable like a constant void, a shapeless nothingness present in every scene. It makes the characters feel like cardboard figures. Jujutsu Kaisen is already getting a better job than many, but I doubt it will do enough for what I've heard, and I fear I am bound to feel let down, and bound to feel unmoved.
After all, if not enough time and care has been given to develop a dynamic, I am not going to feel pressured by the high stakes; if not enough time and care has been given to develop the dynamic between Megumi and Yuuji, as good potential as it has I am bound to feel little for this last confrontation between Sukuna and Itadori, and his effort in getting Megumi back.
#It's not that I think everything has to be character driven or take a lot of care about dynamics#Death Note for instance works well without it. There's juice in the dynamic between Light and his father and the role of Matsuda there#and it works well with Light's views and their evolution and the whole Kira situation. It isn't much. It doesn't need more#But Death Note doesn't truly drop something as big as Gojo and Megumi to then do barely nothing about it#('But L and Watari' not the same at all. That was deepened in the anime and besides Watari is not one of the main characters)#Or Megumi and his sister. If we see barely nothing of Megumi and his sister other than shiny flashbacks of her#how am I to feel moved by it all beyond superficial emotions? I don't know. It just feels so like cardboard to me#And it annoys me! It annoys me a lot! Because Jujutsu Kaisen has amazing potential! The dynamics and characters could be amazing!#But I don't trust they'll live to their full potential and the potential existing for nothing is ruining this for me xD#Jujutsu Kaisen#Sorry this time I'm tagging it. I want to find this and see if I was right when I'm finished. I think I'll read the manga too#The condescending filler breakfast comment by my friend was ironic considering the Kramer vs. Kramer breakfast scenes exist#Breakfast can be so telling. And besides he loves the Chainsaw Man coffee scene so I don't get why not breakfast#But truly some small daily life moments can tell us a lot about a character that we could recognise later on in high stakes scenes#such as how they deal in tense situationsâ what makes them snap#how they go about dealing with a problem.#Sometimes it could be smaller moments or conversations what makes characters reconsider thingsâ not just having Sukuna rip their heart out#In Pandora Hearts the conversation between Elliot and Oz about the book series they love and their favourite characters becomes key#Oz's development and how he regards thingsâ his own personâ and how he deals with situations will be shaped later on by this conversation#till the very end. The entire main character's development is shaped by a 'filler' conversation.It's not filler. It's just not a fight scen#Shonen manga readers find everything filler except for fights which is ironic considering that many fights in shonen feel unnecessary#Breakfast is unnecessary. Just filler. Fighting thirty seven secondary monsters or chapter after chapter of physical training is not. Okay#Things can be small but plot relevant. If it shapes and fleshes out and deepens a character or a relationship it is not filler#And mainly MAINLY for the love of everything good if you're going to make a fucked up or Meaningful Beyond Everything dynamic#give it time and care. Actually write it. Don't give me two panels and one conversation after some life and death situation. It's not enoug#Especially if I'm to believe they are important. Make me believe they actually are#I don't know... This issue with not trusting the development of very well set potential in Jujutsu Kaisen#has not only been keeping me from thoroughly enjoying the seriesâ but actively keeping me from watching for weeks#It makes me doubt if I want to spend my time in this at all since after all time is limited and we can but spend it in a handful of things#A pity. I really love some things and I really think Megumi and Gojo could be everything to me haha the Heathcliff/Hareton vibe gets me
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au where he.laena does want to go to battle after jae.haerys' death though..
#in part because she needs to feel she's doing something to protect them#in a misguided attempt to deal with the feeling of failing to protect her boy#in part the impulsiveness of getting to the point she doesn't care what happens to her#in part the active self-loathing and wanting to suffer and die by putting herself in dangerous life threatening situations#without doing so in a direct way#bc isn't dying for her family the best way to atone for her sins c:#suicidal ideation cw#* out of character: { dreamfyre stan }#aemo.nd doesn't have to ask she volunteers#and even if everyone tried to say no#dreamfyre is older than the dragons the blacks have and only smaller than verm.ithor#she's no small threat! having her out there could make a big difference#and hel.aena is a dragonrider since she was 11#tell me she wouldn't be more in sync and control dreamfyre better than a hugh or an ulf#so yeah even if others tried to stop her she has reasons to point at and argue#in no way this is criticism of her canon storyline i know personally how crippling depression can be#and how deeply grief can affect it#but! i think there's also other ways it can manifest and be harmful without people noticing that's the root of the issue#her going to battle for vengeance would be a big au change#her going to battle moved by guilt and self-hatred? not that much of a stretch
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Cant believe shinji x fuuka isnât a more popular ship like. Does this sopping wet loser couple mean nothing to you people
#persona#persona 3#shinjiro aragaki#fuuka yamagishi#its so cute its so fucking cute like shinji having a soft spot for fuuka#and helping her cook and trying to help in a way thats encouraging without also losing his mind#cuz shes like comically bad and shinji is really passionate about it so its gotta be torture but potentially upsetting fuuka is worse#and like shinji lied about sees not having a nav persona user to protect fuuka#plus they both have deep self worth issues like shinji is suicidal and on drugs and fuuka has been horribly bullied and feels like a failure#but you know theyd help each other so well#and liiiiike its cute im such a fucking sucker for big gloomy guys and their silly funny girlfriends#and im extra biased since theyre my favorite characters id kill for both of them they live in my pocket
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I'm not enough of a book purist to not being able to enjoy headcanons, crackships etc (as a matter of fact I do love them). But seeing newbies unironically and completely serious considering aemond to "trying to be the perfect son", or "heleana is the people's princess" or "rhaenyra is calm, collected and strategic", "Daemon is the family's clown, the agent of chaos" legit gives me a headache because they are nothing like that.
And I'm not talking about ppl writing fanfics with this type of characterization, but ppl legit having takes based on the terrible portrayal of the show. And even when they go to read f&b they still have the image the show gave them because they don't seem capable of letting go.
it just feels like Jon Snow/Daenerys Targaryen character assassination all of again.
There are so many people who consider Jon to be basically ned 2.0 and Dany a mad queen-girlboss-slay
I just wish we could seperate books from adaptations. That's all
#don't be a jerk i'm just venting âď¸#anti hotd#I know the greens had 2% of actual characterization so fans are now making their own hcs but#my issue is they slowly legit believe them to be canon#rhaenyra was not chill. She was emotional. thought first with her heart. could be immature and had temper#aegon was not a loser crybaby. he was spoiled. had freedom to do as he wished and was simply lazy and unmotivated#aemond was already a psycho before his eye loss. and was obsessed with proving himself. he gave 0 shit about his fam#helaena only had 1 line in f&b and even that gives her more personality than the cringe show version#alicent was not a child bride. she was an ambitious woman. a big hypocrite who was obsessed w Rhaenyra and had beef with her since rhaenyra#Viserys was a girl dad and loved rhaenyra and heleana. he also loved alicent very much. aegon and aemond were simply red flags#daemon was not a deadbeat dad. he was ruthless and he wanted the throne and power. his marriage with Laena softened him a lot#and he became dedicated to his fam to the point he killed himself to take out Rhaenyra's biggest threat aka vhagar (not aemond)#otto was not a warm grandfather. he only cared about gaining power and he gave 0 shit about what his grandkids could be going through#grrm does write grey characters but he also writes ones who are meant to be interpreted as good/evil#and the greens are very obvious the antagonists of the dance#I'm not saying you shouldn't like them but fandom should stop trying to rewrite f&b with their hcs#people enjoy joffrey and ramsey but no soul says they were victims#f&b meta#hotd meta#anti ryan condal#Ryan will pay for his crimes
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I've felt for a while that Deku is like the Tohru to Shigarakis Akito lol. I feel like MHA and Fruits Basket have so much in common. I love that Deku has met all these people that need help and he is able to be there for them. But kinda like Tohru, he sacrifices his own wellbeing too much and he needs to accept help from others. I also love that characters like Todoroki are similar to Yuki. They receive help from Deku but then grow on their own as well and become a positive force to help others.
!!!!! This comparison has been in my head for a very long time, yeah.
I think that's what turns people off to Midoriya as a protag because he's far more similar to a freaking shojo female lead than a shounen male lead aks;gaskgn Personally I find that both hilarious and great but not everybody feels that way lol.
There are people who hate it because he's not their tough guy kick-ass tough exterior protag, and people who hate it because he's not as complex as the villains..or something along those lines.
Sometimes the protagonist halo of "selfless to a fault" is just who the character is. Either you like the trope or you don't, but trying to make it into some awful crime against the manga is stupid imo and it's better just to admit it's not a trope you like ÂŻ\_(ă)_/ÂŻ
But tbh I do find it interesting that â¨for some reason⨠it's perfectly fine for Tohru to have that protag halo and people receive it super well in Fruits Basket but god forbid Midoriya have the same type of characterization and because of this specific trope played into him he's just so god awfully written đ. What's the difference between the two characters and genre? Lol we'll be up all night trying to figure that out.
No but seriously. I 100% get the comparisons to Naruto and I've made them myself, but I find much more in common with a manga like Fruits Basket, as you said. Especially because much like BNHA, Fruits Basket covers dark topics that can be icky to think about, it covers different reactions and victims, it talks about forgiveness and resentfulness and family dynamics and relationships, connections, bonds, all of that stuff. BNHA covers interpersonal dynamics with much more detail like Fruits Basket. You can go back to early chapters, look at the characters that are in the forefront of the conflict of the endgame and see exactly why each pair of characters was matched up together.
Also you've completely opened my eyes to the Shouto|Yuki comparison. God you're so right. I've mentioned this being one of the things I liked about Shouto's healing so much but he's one of the few characters who has almost complete independence in his healing and his choices to move forward. I love a dynamic where someone is so damn helpless that they're depending on someone else's kind heart to survive, and I'm getting that with the villains, but Shouto himself is a breath of fresh air.
Tomura really is like Akito, where he fights his salvation over and over and over and rejects any implication that someone may want better for him and is just lost in self-hatred to the point that it's going to swallow him-----up until the very last second. Yeah, that's him, and Akito. It's also crazy comparing it because Tohru and Akito didn't interact much to each other, and all they had to go off of was the butterfly effects their actions had on each other and how everything they did eventually reached the other and that's how that connection was strong enough by the end for Akito to accept help. Sounds very familiar to me. Man, wild.
I said I wanted that scene with Rin and Tohru recreated with Tomura and Izuku and I mean that, but I do think Akito and Tohru are more similar a dynamic to the BNHA bunny and cat duo.
Also this is what I mean by BNHA has boiled down to "I can fix him" being the answer LOL
"I (Izuku, Shouto, Ochacko) can fix him (Tomura, Touya, Toga)" đ
Fruits Basket was very much like that also with pretty much no irony at all đ
#it's been a while since i got an ask this fun#yesss furuba and bnha comparisons gogogogo#fruits basket#bnha#boku no hero academia#anonymous#bnha asks#furuba#đđ#shigaraki tomura#midoriya izuku#tohru honda#akito sohma#no but i'm serious about how it's stupid that it's fine for tohru but not izuku?#like in fruits basket tohru doesn't really carry the manga on her own#she's fantastic but she cannot carry that manga alone#deku is like that and idk why that makes him so awful to people? lol#I think hori tries to use dk in ways that don't help his character and that's where MY issue comes in but it's not even that bad#like it doesn't happen that often tbh#dark dk arc is the biggest offense and in retrospect it's not even that big of an offense#it was just annoying following week by week#anyway yeah i'm tired of apologizing for liking izuku i'm over it
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i promise i have not abandoned my builds, i did not mean to post a teaser then run asdfghjk shortly after my last post, my laptop went into the shop for like three weeks and i've been feverously trying to clean out some of my cc since it got back
the cleaning is futile because i have like over 27k of mods because i have a problem though i did manage to reduce my mods folder by like 5gb so that's nice at least
#she avoids mentioning her mods folder is still like 120gb#anyway im almost done with my cas stuff so i can do my final run throughs of my files in game and clear out broken things and recolors#which no longer have base meshes and what not#my sims 4 game is....Very Large#like comically so#i'd consider starting from scratch but the issue with that is like i've been collecting mods since the game came out#so i have some really old things that have since been wiped from the internet which is both a blessing and a curse#my mods folder is so big because i am very scattered in what i like to do when im in game do i want to do a period build do i want to make#wow characters in cas do i want to play do i want to stage a cute photoshoot like i've got like 4 different games in here dsfghjk
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every time i see a wowp tik tok, it sends me barreling back into it with a slew of thoughts that for some reason tends to be the opposite of the general reception of the show. like the takes for this disney channel show is some of the wildest iâve ever seen
#like justin being the 'real villain' of the show. no. he isn't. that phrase is now like a.. yellow flag for me idk lol#saw a tik tok of girl making coffee or something and talking about how she hates theresa and jerry which i could very well see her points#like some of her points i was like yeah :/.. and some others i was like Woah what? this seems like hard projecting?? idk..#i'm not trying to negate her feelings but the problem is very much the wizard competition#the way ppl get VERY amped up about this show makes me a lil nervous lol like i thought I took media way too serious sometimes#idk if maybe the russos being a dysfunctional family hits too hard for some people OR it's too much for the ones w/ healthy fam dynamics?#cuz i like them being dysfunctional as someone w/ a v dysfunct fam n the characters take a lil pride in it too esp alex. the big issues#seem to come in s3-4 esp 4. which was dealing w/ internal production issues becoming writing issues.#been hearing of lots of disney interference as well.#anyways i think s2 is my fav season. the movie being almost like peak wowp to me#but V MUCH agree that max deserved better in that writing room like ive been his campaigner since 2020 dont talk 2 me amongus user maxrusso#if ANYONE w/ better analysis/speaking skills than me wants to chime in ur v welcome! preferably one w/ similar views cuz i can only do sm#of the opposite/echo chamber type takes i keep seeing#.txt#tv: wizards of waverly place
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AHH THE PAIN THE PAINNN(Iâm being partially dramatic)
#hi yâall back to ranting in the tags because writing here makes me feel like itâs hidden even if it isnât#anyway one of my friends got into the Pedro fandom and Iâve been sending her some of my fave acting scenes heâs done in his various roles#Iâve also been sending her edits and stuff and just screaming about how cool tlou is#and then a stupid part of my brain hit me with this big ol guilt when she was asking about the kingsman movies because she knows i have a#lot of opinions on them#and I was showing her clips and she said she likes how he plays the character but wonât watch the movie and just watch the tik tok edits of#him which totally understandable i have issues with second movie and I didnât have the heart to tell her he dies in the movie so I let her#just live in bliss but man there was a little voice in my brain telling me i abandoned my stupid cowboy and like!!! thatâs just so dumb#I HAVENT WRITTEN FOR HIM SINCE LIKE OCTOBER THAT IS NOT ABANDONMENT!#>:( stupid brain making me feel guilty about not being able to write even though i want to write like so freaking bad BUT I HAVE NO TIME OR#CONFIDENCE SO ITS JUST MAKING ME STEW ANGRILY IN THE CORNER#like i have so so so many thoughts but I have no time to write and my confidence in my skills is next to none now and Iâm just not enjoying#myself! which sucks because i love writing but anytime i write stuff in like a moments notice I say the absolute rudest shit imaginable and#i just sorta give up!#sighhhhhhhhhhh#i donât know how to make if fun anymore because the thoughts in my brain or fun but when I try to transfer that to writing on a doc i beat#myself up. so itâs like a purgatory! goddddd đ#my humblest apologies to those who read this word vomit itâs just been thoughts that have been stuck in my head since⌠may? or maybe more#tbh#Celeste speaks#shit happens i know. i just kinda need to be like hey Iâm confident in what I doâŚwithout like immediately saying something mean to myselfâŚ
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hm this is a bit interesting to say the least. I'm not really iffy about time travel in general and parallel universes could be interesting if done right.. just a lot to think about
Link to article
https://www.eurogamer.net/naoki-yoshida-on-dawntrail-criticism-community-feedback-and-the-future-of-final-fantasy-14
#tbh im open to whatever so its not like im gonna be heavily critical here#the only thing im reallllly looking out for is character writing done in a way that makes the characters feel like their own people and#so forth#I just don't want a bigger picture with minimal character writing.. I guess I mean I want shb/ew/hw(to some extent) lvls of character#writing#while dt had some character writing I liked it focused a little too much on the overall bigger picture than focusing on pre-existing#characters which I didn't like because why are they even there to begin with then ya know?#eh he does go into how its hard to focus on everyone individually in that sense and said that the development team will proceed to only#(maybe) take a select few of scions/pre-existing characters with us from now on since some of them really do not need to be there all the#time for real#Idk I still have hope for whatever comes next so ^_^ yay#I didn't hate dt by any means but I have looked it over and can say krile and erenville should've taken the lead by the second half way mor#overall though I liked dt just not as much as ew/shb/hw#I do have to say though stormblood did have some(very minimal) character stuff I really did like though#I do not like the whole concept of stormblood though with how they structured it. I think that was done pretty poorly#only super big issue I had with hw was ysayle dying#that was just dumb as hell like damn#she would've been such a good character moving forward but. oh well ig#zero is really good too im glad she's still alive :> can't wait for more zero story in the future and I hope she meets Cyella & ryne/gaia#Idk even much abt Cyella since I haven't unlocked those quests for her since I don't wanna lvl tank or healer but I really do love her#design and by the looks of it she's a cool character so. I would love for her to be in the msq someday (meaning soon lol) I have no idea ho#they'd do that though since she's tied to side quest hell#*more#gah I just want more character moments for reaaal#I said though so many times here ignore that đ#*how
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i think the hardest wide-scope or w/e part of the bellum x linebeck fic is def nailing down whatever the larger background plot is. i want there to be some⌠event going on in the background that they occasionally intersect with and has effects on the foreground events, but i canât exactly figure it out yknow
#probably the roughest part in general is just figuring out the non-relationship bits#rn its some cycling of dungeon sea battle visit a town or smth which. can be give good variety#linebeck visits a zora domain in the chapter im planning and im hoping to do some plot stuff with that#like rn its a bit like. tetra has her own faction that wants to bring law to the ocean and kinda create some. unity/governing force#a little bit a mix of her reasons for stopping the ghost ship (smth smth rules to being pirates) and then new hyrule shit#with the added bit of shes also gunning to either kill or seal away big threats (incl bellum if they discover him) for tension#shes not really an antagonist shes just a side character but ig she technically is since shes at odds with linebeck + bellum#so ig rn its. the world may be changing in a major way and its kinda threatening linebeck and bellumâs ways of life + safety#i can see a resolution being that tetra has to agree to some smaller version of her plan bc its a little unrealistic she finds#and people just. dont really want that and want to remain independent on their own terms for the sake of their culture and whatnot#the problem is that i need to set up an eventual actual threat to bellum and im not sure how to introduce it#bc i want it to be a bit of a new thing and i could see tetra altering her plans but losing an aggressive splinter cell faction#that continue hunting monsters and aruff but it feels kinda. out of nowhere. idk the actual plot side of things is the biggest issue#salty talks#bellum x linebeck fic
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read the ID update...it's so short BUT its clarified some things that seemed like they were just based off of circular logic and introduced a tantalizing new aspect to the story
#I thought it was all pointless since the big bad created and resolved all the issues#but the characters are still very much impacted. and now she's a concrete antagonist that other characters are working against#plus her actions almost killed really important characters so they still matter#immortal days lb
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be still my heart â jjk [one]
the one in which you get a sex dream about the grouchy hockey player you work for.
genre : childhood best friends to frenemies to lovers, physical therapist!reader x hockey player!jungkook, slow burn, smut, fluff, angst
word count : 5.2k
chapter warnings : strong language, mature, slight smut (because im a tease), readerâs name is Destiny, jungkook is a bit grumpy towards her (she makes him nervous leave my boy alone), fat shaming (not by any of the main characters), oc had daddy issues, mentions of allergy. thatâs about it, please let me know if i missed something.
a/n : here it isssssss drumrolls please because im so excited for this. jungkook as a hockey player??? *deep breaths* enjoy my lovely people. youâre so so loved. asks, reblogs and likes are much appreciated. kisses <3
read part two here
Ëŕ¨ŕ§â・Ë
âBabe, you know you're not going to win right? Don't be wasting your breath.â Bella challenges.
Youâre sitting on the chair in your office going through the personnel file of the players. Verifying their names with their contact numbers and photographs which, youâre not going to lie, look like mugshots. Jeez, does smiling a little bit cost them? Anyways, once youâre done you close the file and look up at your assistant bickering with her boyfriend. Phone pressed against her ear.Â
You mime hanging up the call and she lifts her index finger, indicating for you to wait. She throws in words like hmmm, yeah, you donât know what youâre saying, yeah i love you too. Once sheâs done, she drops the phone on the glass table in front of you and leans back in her chair.Â
âHe thinks I will let him get away with anything just because I love himâ Â
You chuckle, âWhatâs going on?âÂ
âYou know, Iâve been wanting a cat for so long I even made a pinterest board for that. Last Sunday he surprised me with one and when I told him that I lowkey manifested it, he was not having it. I even showed him the mood board and I NEVER show it to anyone. Evil eye is real.â she all but cries out.Â
Thatâs Bella for you. Highly spiritual and a firm believer of the universe. She claims that everything happens for a reason. Sheâs like a little ball of sunshine. Ever since you joined the Ice Dominatorsâ hockey team as a physical therapist, sheâs been assisting you and you couldnât be more thankful seeing the lack of female workers here. Seriously, there's no other female worker here except yourself and Bella which is so diabolical to you.
And itâs not like the men on the hockey team are a bunch of misogynist jerks. On the contrary, they act like theyâve known you for years. It didn't take you long to feel like home here. They are obedient, friendly and pretty nice. Few of them are married with kids while the rest of them remain single. Theyâre not like a bunch of teenagers, they know what theyâre doing.
Except one, whatâs his name? Jeon Jungkook. You would describe that man as crude and closed off to a pathological degree. You still remember when you asked him to come to your office so you can look at any possible previous injuries, he lied to your fucking face. Claiming he doesnât have any when you could clearly see him hobbling sometimes just a tiny bit when he walked away. Years and years of dedication towards your studies have made you capable enough to catch that it is an old injury.
Despite your better judgment, you blamed it on the fact that his team lost the game that day. Poor guy was having a bad day and took it out on you. Big deal.Â
âEarth to Destinyâ Bella waves a hand close to your face and you shake your head as you look at her.
âLeave the poor man aloneâ You plead and then ask, âAny details about the new player? Iâll have to add it in the fileâÂ
âNot yet, as far as I know theyâre still contemplating the guy named Park Jimin or somethingâ
That gets you real quick. Park Jimin. The name feels like acid on your tongue .The last game being unsatisfactorily resulted in the federation trading one of the players. It was cruel but was done for the better. Bound to happen sooner or later. You had expected it but what you had not expected was you both sharing a same room, sharing the same air.
âAlright then. Weâll cross that bridge when itâsââ
Knock, knock
âMiss Kim, sorry to interrupt but the manager is asking for youâ Taehyungâs head pokes through the door.
You stand, picking up the file and sliding it into the tableside drawer, running a free hand over your scrubs. Bella does the same as she plucks her phone from the table and puts it inside her back pocket.
You look at him. âSure Tae, thank you for informingâ
He flashes you a quick, pretty smile before leaving. Bella turns to you with a worried look on her face.
âWhat do you think it is for?â
You bite your lip. âI have no idea. I wanna say it's about the new player but who knows?â
You hope it is and as unfortunate as it is for you to discuss him, you will have to hold your own. You know better than to be invited into the managerâs office. Though, judging by the temperament of him you would not predict anything. Last time when he called you, it was about Jeon Jerk, asking you to be more serious about your job as if it was your fault the man spared you the necessary details.
The asshole asked YOU to do your job better by virtue of HIS player not being sweet enough to listen. Maybe, there is indeed a misogynistic asshole going around and itâs the manager. No wonder women donât volunteer to work for him.
Since, You love your job âgod knows you wanna keep doing itâ you kept quiet and took every jab he threw at you.
âWait, Do I have time to pray? Should I pray?â sheâs clearly panicking and you pat her on the shoulder.
âJust hope my job is still intactâ you say, warily reaching for your purse. You both head out.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§â・Ë
âMiss Kim, have a seatâ James nods at the chair before him.
Once youâre settled, he continues, âI asked for you to join me here regarding the upcoming game. Care to fill in about the status of injury assessment?"
You clear your throat, âAbsolutely, I was planning on getting on that todayâÂ
âWell, I would love for you to do it soon as you know we have a new player in the team with us nowâ
You jerk, leaning forward. âWe do?â
âYes, and if you can please hurry with the assessment I would be grateful. You can do that right? Not too much of a work for you, eh?âÂ
Someone give him a medal from the way he's trying to hide the venom in his voice.
âSure I canâ you give him a firm nod.Â
James Adams is an entitled, self centered asshole who thinks heâs above everyone else just because of his position. You reckon he does anything for the team besides talking bullshit. He kind of reminds you of your dad who also has the nasty habit of thinking the world of himself.
Youâre all about self love but when that self love turns into chronically demeaning everybody in their close proximity, it boils your blood. This man in front of you is no better than your father. What's that saying? Out of the frying pan into the fire.
So you say nothing further and excuse yourself. You would have barfed in his face if you stayed there a second longer. Actually that's not a very bad idea. Bella is standing outside waiting for you as you close the door behind yourself.
âWhat did he say?âÂ
You bark, âBunch of horseshitâÂ
âTypicalâÂ
Ëŕ¨ŕ§â・Ë
JungkookÂ
There is a buzzing noise somewhere around Jungkook. Fuck, his head hurts. He frantically searches for his phone, still not opening his eyes. When he finds it, he slides his thumb on the screen and picks up the call.Â
âDude, how big do you want your coffin to be?â He loves his best friend but right now he would rather be sleeping than listen to him bark in his own ear.Â
He finally squints his eyes open, âWhat the fuck are you talking about?âÂ
âHave you looked at the time?â says Taehyung.
âWhat time- FUCK!!!â he shrieks as he looks at the clock.
Somebody kill him right now. No wait, heâs gonna die either way so why bother. If he didnât scream loud enough before, he does now. He all but jumps off the bed when he sees the blondie on the other side sleeping like she fucking owns it, wearing nothing but a thong. She must have heard him malfunctioning because soon she stirs, groaning as she slowly wakes up like a Disney princess. Who the heck is she and how did she get in here? Then it comes to him.
âPlease Jungkook just take me to your room and fuck me. Show me what those hockey hands are capable of.âÂ
He wants to swallow a fistful of iron nails. Speaking straight from his shoulders, he has made plenty of bad decisions throughout his career and this is not his first time bringing a puck bunny up to his room but it has never come to this. Missing his hockey practice because he was too exhausted to get his sweet ass up and run to the academy.Â
Taehyung screams from the other side of the line, âAre you there? Hello?âÂ
Shit, he forgot he was on a call.Â
âIâll be there soon. Cover for me until then.â With that he presses the red circular button and ends the call with him muttering some curses.
He glances back at the blondie, âWhy are you not gone yet?âÂ
Sheâs looking at him with those fuck me eyes she had last night but right now when heâs well aware of the fact that heâs in hot water, they donât do shit to him. Coach will have his head on a platter today for sure. Honestly, they wouldnât have done shit to him if it was not for the great deal of alcohol last night.
âI thought of you as a morning sex personâ she twirls a strand of hair with her finger, sitting up now. Her tits hang free and he can see his hickeys decorating her chest.
He wants to laugh. Sheâs not even close to his type. His type is the woman in blue scrubs with her brunette hair slicked back in a ponytail. His type is the woman who looks like she could be watching grass grow rather than to look at him. His type is the woman who walks into a room and lights it up. His type is the woman who is too bright for him and his mundane personality, who has a face worth millions. His type is Kim Destiny.Â
âNo need to waste your precious time thinking about me. You can goâÂ
He places his phone back on the table and saunters over to the bathroom, not bothering looking back at her. He has boundaries and he intends to keep it that way.
He quickly goes through his routine of taking a shower, making a cup of coffee, sliding into a pair of sweatpants and the Ice Dominatorâs jersey with his name on the back. Not in that order, of course.
The girl is thankfully gone by the time he finishes. Once heâs done with his coffee he picks up the car keys and a protein bar from the kitchen counter and heads to the academy hoping his limbs remain intact by the time heâs home.
The Academy is bustling as usual with players keeping themselves busy with hockey and their gym sessions. He heads straight for the rink not even bothering to change into the uniform. He needs to see for himself that everybody is still on the ice. Everything comes after that.
Surprisingly, he sees not a single guy when he reaches there. His heartbeat stops.
âHey Pixie, where are the boys? Did they already leave?â he asks the brunette kid who looks like he just saw a ghost. Or itâs just Jungkook who he saw.
He shakes his head, âTheyâre all in the gym. The doc called them earlier, said she had something important to get done with themâÂ
Jungkook gives him a quick thanks and walks towards the gym. What could be so important that she had to call the boys mid practice? Is someone hurt? Is she hurt? His heart leaps in hid throat as he runs. Fuck, please let him be wrong.
The first thing that he sees as he enters the room full of equipment are his teammates. Taehyung and Yoongi are in the corner lifting weights, Namjoon is using the treadmill as he runs on it. The rest of the boys are all scattered around doing their own thing. He still canât find Destiny anywhere but her assistant, Bella, is talking to Namjoon while holding a file so he lets out a sigh, relieved that nobody is in fact hurt and in need of help.Â
âDo you wanna get a tattoo on the peniâ oh look whoâs here. Jeon Jungkook as I live and breathe.â
Taehyung drops the weight on the ground before walking up to him. Heâs dressed in a black tee and sports shorts. The man looks good in everything. Bet heâd look in a sack too.Â
âWhoa!! Why do you look like you wanna kill somebody or wanna get killed? Is everything okay?âÂ
Jungkook lets his face relax, focusing more on the eyebrows which had gone tensed due to his unnecessary anxiety. âYeah, allâs good. The practice ended early?âÂ
âThe practice ended just on time. Itâs you whoâs lateâ he pats my shoulder.Â
He runs his fingers through his hair and walks towards the bench, dropping his bag on it. Taehyung follows him ignoring Yoongi whoâs calling him back for the weightlifting.Â
âDoc wanted to assess our injuries for the last time before our game if youâre curious which, I know you are. Youâre always curious about herâÂ
He winks at Jungkook and he punches him on the chest. Taehyung laughs as he rubs the spot.
âKeep your voice down, will you?âÂ
Bellaâs voice echoes across the room, âJeon, youâre up nextâÂ
He takes out his water bottle, takes a swig and stands. A wince leaves him as he gets a flashback of the last time he had to face her. It didnât go very well and heâs sure she hates him now. He would too. After all, he not only talked to her rudely but also lied through his teeth about his injury. Itâs pretty old so he had not felt the need to mention it.Â
He sees a guy coming out of the office just before heâs about to enter. He has brown hair long enough to reach the nape of his neck. Even from where Jungkookâs standing, he can say the man doesnât reach above his shoulders. Who the fuck is he? Oh wait, he must be the new player that got traded down here. The guy must have sensed him making a hole through his head by the way heâs staring because heâs begins walking towards him with a bright grin.
âHey man, you must be Jeon Jungkook? Heard a lot about you. Iâm Park Jiminâ He holds out his hand, asking Jungkook to shake it and he gives it a firm handshake. Word to the wise : never give someone a weak handshake. His grandfather has been asking him to do that ever since he was 15, said it doesnât leave a strong impression and heâs be lying if he says he was wrong.
He offers Jimin a nod, âNice to meet you. Excited to get on the rink with you.âÂ
He takes his hand back. âOh the feeling is mutual butââ
âJungkook, please join me insideâÂ
Destinyâs voice cuts him off as she looks over to both of them with an eerie expression on her face. Her eyes bounce between them, resting a second longer on Jimin. Does she know him? Do they have a history? Wait, are they a thing? Even if they are, why does it bother him? Jungkook couldnât care less about the pretty physical therapist who wears her blue scrubs like armor and white crocs with strawberries on them.
He gives Jimin another nod and follows her into the office. Although, heâs not sure if a massage table and a stool resting beside it counts as an office. The room which she works in is much better. This one is just for examinations and massage therapy so he guesses it doesnât need that much of an upgrade.
She gestures towards the table, âPlease sitâ
He says nothing and settles himself up, clearing his throat.
âLook I know we got off on the wrong foot last time and it could have gone so much better, but we can still start over right?â
Destiny takes a deep breath, filling her chest with air. Sheâs wearing her hair in a bun today. It sits at the top of her head and some strands are set loose cascading down her face. God, sheâs pretty.
He looks down and back up at her. âSureâ
Her face shows her annoyance with the one word response. He doesn't blame her. He'd be pissed too.
Sheâs quiet for a moment, âWhy donât you tell me about your knee injury to start with?â
âWhat are you talking about?â
She sighs, âYou know what Iâm talking about Jungkook. Please donât make me work for it. Itâs my job to know about your past and present injuries, if any. The manager has already given me crap about itâ
He freezes. His hackles rising and his relaxed face long gone.
âWhat did he say?â
âNothingâ
He levels her with a stern face, âWhat.did.he.say?â
Sheâs not obligated to answer him. Hell, she could just slap him in the face and leave but he needs to know what went down with that son of a bitch. When and if she decides to let him in the details and it turns out something wicked, heâs gonna hunt that man down and make his life miserable.
Much to his surprise, she takes a step back and starts talking. "He called me in his office today and," she halts,
"Well let's just say there were some words thrown around which clearly meant he thinks of me as a feather brained bitch"
He might look unbothered from outside but the indignation inside him could just about burn the whole city down. He tries to keep calm and pries some more.
His jaw clenches. "What else?"
Destiny shakes her head, shuffling on her feet. âJungkook itâs really not that seriouââ
âIt is serious. You work for us, you tolerate our asses and in return if we fail to give you the respect which, you deserve by the way cause itâs the bare minimum, we might as well save everyoneâs time and money by giving all of this up.â
âWhy do you care?â she shakes her head.
He takes a step forward, âBecause youâ Because you work for us, Destiny. You look out for our bodies, our injuries, our fuckups. Is that not enough?â
She barely reaches his shoulders. Itâs cute how she has to crane her neck up in order to look him in the eye. She keeps looking at him for a long minute, searching his face.
âYou think I donât know that? Do you really think I donât have what it takes to ask for my own dignity?â
He takes a long step back. This conversation was as unforeseen as they come. The room gets filled with heavy silence and he can hear Destinyâs heavy breath. He can tell sheâs trying to calm herself as if his words have blindsided her.
Needless to say sheâs a tad bit taken aback. Jungkook would be too if someone who never bothered to speak a word to him and when he did, there was nothing pleasant about his tone suddenly started to care.
But thatâs where sheâs wrong, nothing about his care or concern for her is sudden. He still remembers the day she accidentally drank the almond smoothie Bella brought not knowing the fact that sheâs allergic to it. Sheâd started choking the second it went down her throat. He also remembers how Yoongi injected the epipen against her thigh as she came back to life.
Meanwhile, he stood behind shaking in his goddamn boots. Too scared to let her out of his sight and too pathetic to hold her close. Yeah, heâs not proud of that.
He sighs, âYou know thatâs not what I meantââ
Namjoon walks inside with a hand towel around his neck âDoc, you about done? The boys are being incorrigible over there. If you donât hurry, one of them is gonna call a tattoo artist and get their dick tattooed. Right hereâ
The room falls silent.
âJesusâ she looks over to where the guys are bickering about something, propping her hands on her hips. âYeah, give me a minute.â
âSureâ and with that he walks away.
She picks up a blue file from the stool, not looking at him. Why is she not looking at him?
âIf you donât want to tell me about your injury right now, thatâs fine. Since, I know itâs pretty old and Itâs unlikely that youâre gonna get affected by it in the upcoming games, thereâs no need to worry. However, I would still suggest you be careful. Anything can happen out there and your knee is in a vulnerable position. Donât pick unnecessary fights, donât let the opponent know your weak link.â
She glances at him, dropping the file back to where it was.
âYou can goâ
Without a preamble, he heads outside, passing Taehyung. He hears him cracking a joke about penis tattoos and piercings with his girlfriendâs name on it. Destiny cracks up and Jungkook wonders if she would have done the same, had he been the one cracking the joke. Only, he doesnât crack jokes. Not around her at least. Itâs not like he's some grumpy bastard who wants nothing to do with anybody around him and thinks of him as omniscient.
Thereâs just something about Destiny which puts him at loss of words. Knotting his tongue it in such a way where he canât get an expression out. Only look at her and god, does he look at her. He's not stupid. He knows itâs a crush but sheâs like a mirage to him. Sheâs unreachable, forbidden and so fucking beautiful.
Does he want to make her his? Yes, Is he going to risk his career and hers over it? Absolutely not. So, he makes use of the only right nobody can take away from him. Not even her. Admire her from afar. Fantasize more about tasting her, licking her slender neck and worshipping the ground that she walks on and one day if she lets him, Jungkook will do anything to turn all of that into reality.
He finds Yoongi seated on of the benches, scrolling on his phone.
Facing him, Jungkook speaks in a low voice. "Do you have any idea where James is?"
Ëŕ¨ŕ§â・Ë
Destiny
Never have you ever wanted to run away as much as you did when you saw Jimin in front of yourself, standing all tall and proud. You had wished it to be a dream, wished you just had a nightmare about him joining the same team you happen to work with but reality is a goddamn bitch and it bites hard when it does. He had grown out his hair longer but he still has the same smile, same eyes and the same charm he used on you back then. Park Jimin is a man people donât ever forget once they see him. He has an aura which traps everyone so hard they can never escape. How do you know? You have been a victim yourself.
You meticulously go through the consequences and eventualities of being in the same room as him again. You seeing him everyday and him reminding you of every single detail you have tried so hard forgetting about, the boys finding out about you both and putting you through the wringer or worse, him. The possibilities are endless and you feel the sudden urge to square everything with him.
Contrary to what you had thought, he reacted pretty normally when he saw you as if somebody had already told him about you. You had expected him to get shocked or at the very least pretend to be shocked.
Having said that, he just gave you a single nod as if you're someone he passes by every morning at the park. Are you this forgettable? Are you someone people just brush aside like that? Your fatherâs words echo in your ears like loud drums,
âYou know, nobody will love you if you keep looking like this. Eat lessâ
âGirl, do you ever stop eating? Every time I see you, you're stuffing something in that mouth of yours!!â
âDonât come running back at me when no guy gives a shit about youâ
You were 10 and he was an asshole. He still is.
Thanks to him, you now have a tendency to cook when you're stressed over anything. It brings you comfort and diverts your mind from the excessive overthinking. You would go bald if it puts the voices into silent mode.
After already wasting half of your life speculating what to eat, counting calories and whatnot, you came to the terms that you canât actually operate that way and began eating whatever the fuck you wanted. Yet still, you need to go a long way in order to fully love yourself and your body. It's a journey and you're moving ahead step by step. One day at a time.
One would even say you're hot. You have received compliments from several people over the course of time except you donât have a thigh gap, your arms jiggle and you also happen to have a love handle. You would have adored them if it wasnât for your dad making you feel shitty about having them.
A knock on your door stops you midway as you're kneading the dough. Biscuit runs over to you, jumping on the counter.
âComingâ
The knock comes back again, this time slightly louder.
âOh my god wait Iâm comingâ
The door swings open and you gasp. âMina?â
She passes by you, dragging her suitcase along with her.
âHey bestieâ
You close the door and follow her further into the hall. âWhatâs going on? Whatâs with the suitcase?â
Your best friendâs sudden arrival must have caught you by slight surprise but your cat is rather pleased to see her. Traitor. She starts clawing at her feet excitedly.
âWhat a good girl you are? Yes, you areâ Mina coos at her and then glances up at you from where she has biscuit nestled in her lap,
âI need a place to live for a few days because my shitty boss kept rejecting all my articles and I really wanna bring her something worth the front page. Apparently, writing about the famous coffee shop around the corner and their secret ingredient being maple syrup wasnât good enough.â
You round the counter and continue kneading the dough for your strawberry pie. Itâs not unlikely for Mina to show up unannounced. In fact, she has done that plenty of times but the suitcase was never involved. This one is new.
âSo you decided to barge in here without even asking?â You tease.
She flashes you a dramatic look. âLook at us, Destiny. Arenât we the same girls who giggled about living together after college? With matching slippers and movie marathons?â
âOkay okay you dramatic bitch. How long are you here for?â
Biscuit runs to do her business and she gets up, setting her suitcase to the side.
She sighs, âNot sure. As long as it takes me to come up with a new topic to write aboutâHEYâ why donât I just write on the hockey team you work with? What are they called? IceâŚiceâ
âIce Dominatorsâ you fill in for her.
She slaps her thigh. âThatâs the oneâ
You shrug, âI mean you can, but youâll have to call in on the coach first. He operates everything inside and outside the teamâ
Coach Ian is too nice to turn her request down. Heâs one of the most genuine people in the federation. Maybe this is why the team is so strong and united. He respects every single boy and receives it tenfold. It's a mutual thing.
âShit, How come I didnât think about thatâ she bites her lip, her enthusiasm replaced by nervousness.
âDonât worry. He wonât make you work for it. Ian is as nice as they comeâ you assure.
She takes a deep breath and lets it out. As you watch, she opens your fridge, taking out the box of frozen blueberries and pops one into her mouth.
âDo you want me to give you a hand?â she mumbles while chewing.
You point towards the bathroom, âGo and take a shower, right now. You stinkyâ
You duck the blueberry she throws your way, laughing as you do. Giving your cheek one last kiss, she excuses herself.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§â・Ë
Warm hands roam over your thigh, squeezing them. You muffle your moan with your palm and take every thrust.Â
âYeah, you like that? You like how Iâm pounding into this ass right now?âÂ
You gasp.Â
âSuch a good girlâ he praises.
The man behind you presses a kiss to your naked shoulder as he rasps in your ears, âWere you walking around all day dripping for me?âÂ
He pulls his cock out and thrusts again. You meet him with equal passion and hunger.Â
âTell meâÂ
You nod.Â
âI need your words, DestinyâÂ
You cry out, âYes Oh god, Yes. I wanted you in me so badâÂ
He cups your pussy and rubs your clit with his palm until you're rolling your eyes to the back of your head and squirming. Thrust after thrust he brings you to your sweet release while talking dirty things in your ear. You're about to melt into a puddle of goo. Heâs got you totally at his mercy.Â
âSo beautiful like this. Taking my cock so well huh?âÂ
âAhh it feels so good, right there. Just right there, donât stopâÂ
He bites down your shoulder, âCome for me and let everyone outside hear the name youâre screaming, you dirty whoreâÂ
Your heartbeat picks up as you squeeze him with the tight ring of muscle, orgasm crashing over.Â
âFUCK. Oh my god Jungkook!!â
Your eyes fling open and you sit up so fast your head starts spinning. Everything around you is pitch black. Wait, where am you?Â
Mina is at your side in an instant, âDestiny, are you okay babe?â
You look around and release a sigh of relief. You run your fingers through your hair, ruffling them.Â
âYeah um⌠Iâm fine. It was just a bad dream. Go back to sleep.âÂ
Except it wasnât. It was one hell of a dream where you were getting fucked into oblivion by your player. You're not even going to lie and say that you didnât like it. Câmon you're a woman of needs, itâs just that, him fulfilling those needs was not on the cards for you even if it wasn't real.
You check the time on your phone and wince at the bright light flashing up at you. Itâs 2:45 am and you just had a back breaking sex dream about a man who you want nothing to do with. Who, as beautiful as he is, annoys the hell out of you with those one word replies and grumpy face. An edgy feeling threatens to rise.
Oh god itâs going to be awkward now. Itâs only normal to walk on eggshells around someone people have these sort of dreams about. You have read your fair share of books where the female character gets a sex dream about a man and then they donât talk to each other for the rest of their lives. Okay, that's a bit of a stretch but it might as well not be.
Yeah, you admit you guys donât talk to each other a lot as it is, or are longtime best friends tiptoeing around their feelings, but you're afraid you're gonna have to ignore him forever for the sake of your own sanity.Â
Iâm so fucked. You think.
tags - @httpjeonlicious @lovingkoalaface @rpwprpwprpwprw
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