#since he says that straight up first it could be interpreted as him saying 'i like You' which is why adachi goes 'whuh???' and turns red-

[cubedmango]

「30歳まで売れないとアイドルになれるらしい」 (from cherry magic volume 12 special edition) — english translation

[dunmeshistash]

How do you feel about Milsiril? Like what do you think of her interactions between the canaries, her goals, her intentions and morality? I keep seeing people with mixed feelings about her, some saying she's just toxic or morally grey or doing bad but with good intentions or that she's just a mentally ill and literally so much more, also with the comic about Otta calling Milsiril love for her children/Kabru as just love for a pet, I always saw people take it at face value and say yes, Milsiril did love them more as pets instead of children, did she take up raising/adopting non-elf children because she felt like none of them could ridicule her like the elves did because they didn't know what an elf was supposed to be like (and also because they were children) or did she inherently view them as less? I mean the canaries and I'm pretty sure almost all of the cast in dungeon meshi have some sort perspective on different races especially because how they were taught about them, i just think it was interesting to finally see someone interpret it as Otta just misinterpreting Milsiril, I'm just really interested in her, i think shes neat, sorry for the rant!

Ooh, well to preface this, I hadn't really realized Milsiril was such a controversial character before my last post, I kinda live under a rock. She's really not a character I had given much thought besides what I wrote there before it, but I can do my best to express what I have thought since, with sources for it. I'm not sure what order to go thru so I'll just go by manga appearances and then extras, this will probably be quite a long post

This is the first time she shows up in the manga (ch55) Kabru is wondering about what future they might have if the elves take them into custody because of the ancient magic, he thinks about Milsiril as a get out of jail card, and mentions "There's a chance they would make us become permanent resident of the elven lands." with the image of Milsiril holding him. I don't think that means she would be the one to not let them leave, since this would probably be an legal issue, and the fact Milsiril lives away from other Elves. It does set up that Milsiril is quite overprotective tho, with Kabru's reaction to her teary hug. (rest is under a cut)

The next time she shows up is in ch61 right after Kabru falls down the dungeon along with Mithrun, he faints and has this flashback

She's being her overbearing self treating Kabru's small injury as if its something you need to be in bed for, hand feeding him like he's a toddler, and when he insists he wants to learn how to fight and be strong like her, she hugs him revealing to us for the first time her arm scars, she's cleary in distress too, so you wonder "what has happened to her?"

It continues in the next pages, as she tells him to stay there, where it's safe and there's cake, and describes the bad things he might encounter. Until he tells her he will go with or without her help

Honestly this is a Kabru we don't see often, this is the version of him that is usually in thought bubbles, he's blowing out in frustation over being smothered and demanding straight up what he wants, instead of trying to manipulate Milsiril, very blunt for him. Milsiril seems to flip a switch into battle mode, when she decides to train him for real.

I really thought this was funny, the visual of these cuddly toys and this Mom that was being so soft just a second ago completely flipping into something menacing is very amusing to me. She says "I'll give you an exhaustive, thorough training in how to use a sword... until you finally decide that you're ready to give up." although it sounds cruel, it seems she really trained him as best she could to make sure he would survive the dungeon. If he couldn't take the training with her there was no way he would be able to take on the dungeon, but he could, so much so that he managed to make her let him go. I can see this being seen as her trying to prevent him from going but to me it seems more like some tough love from a traumatized war veteran in this case.

The last thoughts he has is admitting his Mom was right, "Not only were there plenty of traps, monsters, and malice... but there were times when I felt so hungry and cold that I couldn't stand it."

And he concludes with "I never once thought that I wanted to go back there. That room where I could eat all the cake that I wanted..." While I can understand the interpretation that he means he would rather go thru all this than go back, perhaps cause he hated it there, I think it's rather a statement to how committed he is to defeating the dungeon, the visuals show him in rubble vs him in a soft big bed, the rough reality he fought to be able to face and the comfyness of what his life could be. Plus is mirroring exactly what Milsiril said to him. Admitting she was right about the bad things but that he won't give up for the safe easy life he had.

After that visuals of Milsiril are used while Kabru tries to sus out Mithrun but she shows up again in Mithrun's backstory.

Here she's straight up called Gloomy, which wasn't really the version of her we saw so far, gotta remember this is also how Mithrun saw her and that she was called gloomy as a way of bullying. Kabru mostly cuts off her part in the story until the end, when she's the one to find Mithrun after he was eaten by the demon

She doesn't really care much for Mithrun as we see in some extras, and she was ready to mercy kill him, but she is also the one to spare his life. This could be seen as her thinking he can still be of use, and it's how it sounds with how Kabru tells the story, but I do think this was also a merciful act, Mithrun was in rehabilitation for 20 years after being saved, by the time he was actually useful for anything Milsiril had already left the canaries and adopted Kabru.

Now for extras... About Mithrun/The Canaries, Milsiril was cleary someone that hated the people around her. This is her extra in the Adventurer's Bible

Milsiril seems to be the type that hates "popular kids" so to say, her description says she was bullied by other elves for being so introverted so I believe she holds a grudge against people like Mithrun that seem to have succeeded where she failed. But realizing he was a twisted person like her seemed to make her feel more sympathetic towards him, that's why I think she really did act with mercy when she saves Mithrun, he's now someone she sees as similar to her, she sees he also suffered like her

Her decription also mentions she left the canaries specifically because she was disgusted with how the Utaya situation was dealt with. Yet it seems like she came back to help Mithrun with his rehabilitation once she quits.

There's an interpretation to be made that she did this only to get "revenge" on the demon since she just saw the destruction of Utaya, and that she's using him. On the other hand maybe she wants to help him find a motivation to live, she's no longer a canary and she has time to actually help him now. I don't know which one is the truth but it's not obviously something self-serving if you ask me. Especially in the context that right before this scene Milsiril admits she wishes they could have talked before.

My interpretation of her relationship with the canaries and other elves is that she's someone depressed that was mistreat for her 'quirky' side, the dolls are clearly one of the ways she used to cope with anxiety/depression but it only caused her to be bullied by her own kin, she's the daughter of an important family and it's shown in other extras, including one about Mithrun, that nobles often send out the kids they don't want around to become canaries. It's an easy way to get rid of someone undesirable and I think it was the case for Milsiril. (Pattadol even assumes her parents love her less than her sisters for sending her to join the canaries).

No wonder than that now that she's finally free from the canaries she chose to seek her own happiness away from the society she felt she could never fit into, she clearly likes to take care of children too, I think it's mean to assume she only likes them because she feels superior to them when there's no indication that this is the case.

And I don't think it's a coincidence she's so overprotective of Kabru after Utaya, it's literally the tragedy that was the breaking point for her, and he's a surviving small child from that tragedy, Milsiril cares about Kabru and wanted him to have a comfortable safe life after everything he went thru...

This ended up getting way too long so I'll make second part tomorrow about the rest of the extras and Kabru, and some other things I've seen said about Milsiril, but to answer the questions...

I don't think she treats her children as pets, Otta is just salty she was called out for dating like Leo Dicaprio.

Every single dungeon meshi character can be called morally grey because they all have flaws that in our world can be considered unforgivable, but they don't live in our world. To me Milsiril is doing her best in the context she lives in.

Who even is neurotypical in dungeon meshi, Milsiril is yet another flavour of a neurodivergent traumatized character among so many.

I believe she thought of the other canaries, especially Mithrun, as the same type of people that were cruel to her, probably because some of them really were, but that she generalized it to the point she thinks of all of them as bad by default. You can only get hurt so many times before you assume everyone will hurt you.

Part 2

[lovely-peace]

Lovely?

Summary: You don't like the marauders. You don't talk and don't even look at them. But as you visit your friend in the hospital wing you encounter a certain boy with brown hair, scars and this lovely eyes.

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Gryffindor!reader

Warnings: Low self esteem, past bullying?, This is no bully! Marauders fic!!

Part 1 Part 3

"Hey, do you want to study for Transfiguration together?"

A normal day. It should have been. But ever since I was asked who I would date, I've been hearing giggles and whispers. And now James is standing in front of Amy and me. Ready to finish something. I don't know what yet, but it's going to hurt.

Because it will be a joke of theirs.

"Why should we?" I go straight on the offensive. Leave fears behind and intimidate them.

Sirius, who was standing behind James, looked to the side to stifle a laugh. That kind of upset me.

"Well, in the last lesson you had... We thought we could help each other."

Oh. My mistake. That they laughed about. Learning. Together. Actually, they just want to smile at my stupidity. SMILE.

"Amy doesn't even have Transfiguration." I hissed, looking the boy in front of me in the eye for the first time. He looked almost uncomfortable.

This boy I rode to Hogwarts with in the same wagon. And who now feels too cool to remember my name. I'm just a joke that you crack a few times and then forget.

"Which is why, unfortunately, I have to say goodbye and go upstairs. Important subjects are waiting for me!" Amy tapped my shoulder and I was about to thank her inwardly until- "That's why I'm leaving this sweetie here with you, okay?"

Peter looked up from his book for the first time. He was sitting on the couch by the fire.

In the common room of Gryffindor, it was not uncommon for people to fight over this space. Peter snatched it early enough so that Remus, who looked very ill that morning, just sat on the chair at the table next to it.

Peter was probably just as disappointed that Amy left as I was, if I interpreted his expression correctly.

"Amy," I whispered to her, "what are you doing?"

She raised her eyebrows, rolled her eyes and sighed briefly. And I understood. She wanted me to give them a chance.

I looked at her with begging eyes and screamed at her in my mind not to leave me here alone.

"So...?" James stood there like a boy waiting for his mother's permission.

And I wasn't going to give it to him.

"Sorry, Jarry, but I was planning on studying for other subjects with Amy today. So if you'll excuse us." What did I just say?

"Oo-," James looked to his friends while Sirius laughed out loud, "-okay?"

I didn't look at Amy and just stomped faree upstairs to our room.

Amy followed me, but not without letting out a sigh of disappointment.

~~

"What was that about?" My voice was a little louder than usual. "I thought we agreed that we didn't like the four of them?"

Amy groaned and threw herself on her bed. "I never said that. I meant that they can be assholes sometimes, that's all."

"But they just were assholes?"

I also sat down on my bed and looked out of the window. The Hufflepuff team was playing quidditch.

"How were they assholes in any way, please? James just asked us if we wanted to study with them in the common room."

I could hear Amy starting to get angry.

"You know what he meant. He only asked because I said something completely stupid in Transfiguration the day before yesterday and everyone had a laugh. And now he wanted to hear more of it."

Amy had gone quiet. Then she snorted loudly. "Jesus Christ."

"What?!" As I turned around, two piercing eyes looked into me.

"Can you please stop painting the devil on the wall for once? You sound worse than Cassandra!"

Now I snorted.

But Amy wasn't finished yet. "You're so afraid of being ridiculed that you're becoming an asshole yourself!"

The sun was setting. And the moon slowly rose.

"Why are you so sure that the four of them are making fun of you?"

I hated that tears were welling up in my eyes. "That's how it always is! Suddenly all these people are nice to you, who didn't even know who you were before, to lure you into safety, but in reality they're blaspheming and laughing at you. It's always like that!"

Amy shook her head.

"No, it's just always like that in your head. There's a chance that these people just want to get to know you better."

Amy took her DADA textbook and turned to the other wall. "To exclude this opportunity from the outset is not only a mistake, but also a missed opportunity to make new friends."

I looked up at the full moon. I felt as if he was out there suffering with me.

You understand me, don't you?

Probably not.

~~

The next morning, Amy was still mad at me. I couldn't blame her. What I said already sounded pathetic.

But so far it had always been the truth.

It was unusually quiet at breakfast. Amy ate almost nothing and hurried to her tray.

We had different subjects at the beginning of the day, but at lunch Amy was nowhere to be seen. There were whispers again and I wanted to scream.

And it was only in charms that I was told she had been taken to the hospital wing. 

That was not uncommon for Amy. Amy was very fragile. Amy always put on a very strong front, also to help me. But the truth was that stress really affected her and at one point she almost fell over sick.

Was it because of our argument? I don't know. But I certainly felt guilty.

~~

After class, I hurried to the hospital wing and let myself be led to her bed.

She looked almost peaceful as she slept. I carefully sat down next to her and took her hand. She was sweaty and cool at the same time.

Madam Pomfrey explained to me that Amy had been under a lot of stress lately and had eaten something bad. Then she went to the next bed and talked with the visitors there.

Visitors with... familiar voices?!

"Oh, please, you can't expect us to just leave him here alone?" Was that Sirius?

"Yes, I must. You know he needs his rest now. So shoo." Madam Pomfrey sounded a bit annoyed.

"We can stay here quietly!" That was James. Ironically loud.

"No, Mr. Potter, you cannot. So, gentlemen. Out!"

I saw out of the corner of my eye how Madam Pomfrey shooed several people outside. But who was behind the curtain of the bed? Whom were they visiting?

The curtain didn't cover the whole bed. In fact, it was only drawn on my side. Quietly, I got up and tried to get a quick look at the person. I took a cautious step to the side and—

There layed Remus. A pretty battered Remus, wrapped in bandages.

Suddenly, the curtain was pulled back and I stood there as if caught red-handed.

Remus looked at me in surprise. His look was somehow different than usual and I imagined he took a deep breath before he spoke.

"Hi." ... "Hi."

His body was even worse wrapped up than I had seen from the side. He was sitting upright and his upper body was full of bandages. His face also had scratches but his eyes were still so deep-

I stared at him. For far too long.

I quickly sat down next to Amy, who was still asleep.

Remus cleared his throat. "Is Amy very unwell?"

Somehow I wasn't prepared for a conversation with him. Not with one of the four. Not with Remus.

"According to Madam Pomfrey, it's just stress. She just needs to get some rest and then she should feel better." I was almost whispering, my voice was so quiet. Nothing compared to yesterday.

"That's good. I hope she gets better soon. Has anything bad happened?" I looked up at him. His eyes were so gentle, as if he really cared. "Something that's really stressing her out?"

When he noticed my look, he looked away. To my disappointment. "But actually, it's none of my business-"

"We had a fight." Why did I tell him that? "I worried her again."

I looked at Amy. Her face wasn't quite so pale and her hand, which I was holding, wasn't quite so sweaty.

"Oh." Remus' voice was very quiet. As if he was afraid of saying the wrong thing. As if he was worried to say the wrong thing.

"And why are you lying here? What happened to you?" It was only when I looked at him that I realized the question was a bit rude.

"If you want to tell me," I added.

He just sighed and suddenly looked so far away. "It was an accident."

I waited for him to tell me more. He didn't.

It stayed quiet between us for a long time. I could feel his gaze from the side, but somehow it didn't bother me a bit. I almost felt safe.

Suddenly he asked me: "Why did you argue?"

I looked into his eyes and almost wanted to tell him everything. I looked at Amy and borrowed her words. "I was an asshole."

He tilted his head and smiled cautiously. "Somehow I can't imagine that."

I looked at him. He looked at me.

"Why?"

"Well, you... It's not like you at all."

I continued to look at him. He continued to look at me.

"What do you mean?"

"You're usually so... Lovely."

Lovely? He saying I was lovely?

I had to laugh. He looked away.

"Me? You don't know me then." I giggled softly. "Besides, anyone can be an asshole, no matter how sweet the person still is."

He looked outside. The moon was up. He had that look again. "Yeah, I guess you're right about that."

It was quiet again after that. I heard soft footsteps outside and my anxiety wanted me to leave. So I stood up and was about to say goodbye to Remus as he-

"I want to know."

"What?"

He suddenly looked into my eyes so intensely that I felt dizzy.

"I want to know you properly."

I didn't know what to say and just looked at him as he continued.

"I want to know what goes through your mind when you see me us."

His gaze moved away from me. "I want to know why you hate us so much."

My whole world suddenly spun and I was in the middle of it. What was he saying? What did he mean, why was he even talking to me? What was going on here, why was he even here? And why did he call me lovely? What did he mean?

I wanted to say something. Something about... What actually?

Somehow I couldn't get anything out of me and was stuck in this spiral of trying to say something and figure out what to say. I opened my mouth, as-

"Remus, we're here!" James' voice tried to sound quiet but was unmistakable. Just like the footsteps of the two boys walking towards his bed.

When I saw them, so many things came back to me. Why I didn't talk to Remus.

"Are you feeling better? Remus -" Sirius faltered when he saw me. He looked between me and Remus and then grinned at me.

"Oh hello."

He turned to James now and 'whispered' to him. "Prongs, let's go and give these two some time to themselves-"

Remus cleared his throat and pointed at Amy who was lying next to me. Sirius fell silent.

"I'd better go now." I said in a very quiet voice again. James and Sirius even left me alone, but I heard their voices before I closed the door behind me.

"So, did she talk to you?" "What was going on with her?" "Is there something-"

The door slammed behind me and my head seemed to explode with questions.

[lovelybucky1]

Nectar- Tommy Shelby x Reader

warnings: AFAB!reader, f receiving oral sex, fingering, mentions of masturbation, blasphemy kink, church sex, heavy religious themes, corruption kink, dirty talk, canon typical violence

masterlist

The church is quiet like it always is at this hour. The pews empty of parishioners, the confessionals vacant, and the lights dim. The priest and almost everyone in the neighborhood have long been in bed. You, however, were wide awake.

You’ve been working in the church since you were a girl, per your family’s wishes. It’s mostly charity work: caring for the sick, poor, orphans, and others in need. You also spend a fair amount of time working inside the church, cleaning and whatnot. It is fulfilling work, but it doesn’t offer much in terms of pay, so you don’t have much of a space to call your own. That is why you spend your nights in the empty church, alone save for the conversations you have with God.

Since you spend so much time in the church, you’re pretty familiar with the congregation. It’s not often you see a new face unless a new family moves to the city. When you heard the heavy oak doors open, you were expecting a devout Catholic in crisis, not the notorious crime boss, Tommy Shelby.

You watch from the first pew near the altar as he walks down the aisle toward you. His hat and coat are wet from the rain, and once he takes a seat a few rows behind you, he takes them off. You’re confused, wondering what he could be doing in your church in the middle of the night. Part of you feels nervous, knowing that danger never follows far behind a Peaky Blinder.

“Good evening, Mr. Shelby,” you decide to speak up, voice kind and sweet as always.

Tommy’s eyes flick to you, but his expression is unreadable. “I’m not dead yet, eh?” he says. You look closer at him and in the dim light, you can just make out the dried blood splattered on his face.

So maybe it isn’t a good evening. Nevertheless, he has come to a church and he is allowed sanctuary here. You make your way over to where he sits and you stand at the end of the row, obviously looking hesitant if his glance is anything to go by.

“Do you mind if I sit?” you ask. Instead of a response, he cocks his head to the side in a way that you’re interpreting as go ahead. You sit down, pressing your knees together to make yourself as small as possible. There is about a foot of space between the two of you, but even still, the proximity to him is overwhelming.

As the two of you sit in silence, your mind starts to wander. You know his Aunt Polly is Catholic; she frequents the church, though she never attends the services. You’ve overheard her prayers before, and you understand why she prefers to pray in private.

“Are you Catholic, Mr. Shelby?”

Your desire for conversation seems to surprise him. He glances at you out of the corner of his eye before he goes back to looking straight ahead at the altar. It takes him a few moments to respond, and you can see the inner battle on his face as he decides how to answer.

“No,” he says.

“I see. Your Aunt is, though. I see her nearly every day.”

“And she’s a fool for it.” The bitter tone he takes only gives you more questions.

“I take it you don’t believe in God?”

“You’re quite inquisitive,” he says, shooting you a look. “God abandoned me long ago.”

You sigh. Many of the men held the same sentiment after they came back from the war. The horrors they experienced in France, the death and destruction took the fear of God away from these men. Now, all they fear is each other.

“It’s never too late to find him again,” you offer. Tommy lets out a dry, humorless chuckle in response. “You can still be saved.”

“I’m past the point of saving. I’ve got a spot in hell waiting for me.”

You frown at that. “God is all about forgiveness. God will even forgive men like you as long as you accept him.”

“What’s the point in asking forgiveness if I don’t indent on stopping?” he asks, leaning back in his seat, making himself look more intimidating. “And what do you mean, men like me?”

As if someone dumped a bucket of ice water on you, you immediately realize your mistake.

“I didn’t mean to offend you, sir. I just meant men in your… line of work,” you say, trying to backtrack.

“And what line of work is that?”

Tommy is sitting up now, leaning just slightly closer to you. Now that he is fully facing you, you can see the blood on his face, but by the lack of injuries he has, you’re suspecting it’s not his. His gaze is piercing as he stares into your eyes, smirking as he waits for you to respond.

“I-I don’t know.” With a small, satisfied smirk, Tommy leans back again. “I’m just saying, sir, you haven’t strayed too far from God’s light.”

That makes him chuckle again. “I see. So all I have to do is absolve myself, right? Confess my sins and I’ll be God’s child once again?”

He’s toying with you now. He wants to see if you are devoted enough to your God that you’d try to convince the biggest sinner in the city to become a religious man.

“That’s right,” you smile softly, still hesitant from your previous slip-up.

“Can I confess to you?” he asks.

“I’m not the priest-”

“I want to do this now. I want to find God.” His voice is so earnest that you believe him.

“Okay,” you agree. It’s about confessing to God, the person doesn’t matter. “We can go to the confessionals.” You begin to stand, but he stops you by grabbing your wrist.

“That’s far too formal, don’t you think? We can do it right here,” he says, the faintest look of mischief in his eyes.

You nod and sit back down, folding your hands onto your lap. Tommy slides off the bench and sinks to his knees on the floor, hands clasped in front of him.

“Bless me, for I have sinned,” he begins, looking into your eyes. “It’s been many years since my last confession. In my time away I’ve done many bad things, terrible things, that make me ashamed to look in the mirror. I’ve lied, stolen, scammed, and gambled. I live a life of deceit and greed, and I’ve found great success in doing so, but those are not the sins that weigh heaviest on me.”

You watch him intently as he speaks, your eyes tracing every word his mouth forms. Your heart begins to beat quicker in your chest; the idea that you’re getting access to information only meant for God makes you feel guilty, but it’s also exciting in a strange way.

“I’ve taken many lives. During the war, I was ordered to, but I continued once I came home. I’ve killed in every way imaginable. Shot in the head, slitting their throat, hanging, drowning, burning, suffocating. I’ve had men ripped apart for betraying me, and I did not feel remorse. I watched these men suffer as my men tortured them. I laughed as they pleaded for God to save them.”

Tommy doesn’t look as remorseful as most do when they’re confessing their terrible sins. He almost looks proud, like he’s bragging about them to you as you squirm under his gaze. The graphic descriptions he’s offering make you uncomfortable like your skin is too tight on your bones. Like he’s corrupting you just by having you listen to his tales.

There is a blaze behind his light blue eyes that captivate as much as they scare you. They bore into your soul and peel back the layers, revealing all of your inner thoughts. It makes you want to run away screaming, to pray for God to rid this world of the devil in front of you but you’re stuck, frozen in front of him as he confesses.

Tommy takes a breath as if what he is going to say next brings him great shame. As if he hasn’t already confessed the worst sins man could commit.

“Perhaps worst of all, I lust. I lust after women and I envy men with beautiful wives to the point I take them for myself. I’ve had many married women in my bed, as well as hers. I fuck whores too, but only the pretty ones. And they can’t be cheap, because those women can’t keep a secret. I don’t only fuck them in the bed. I’ve fucked in my office, my car, and my pub. It doesn’t matter who these women are, but once I have my sights set on them, I am determined to get what I want.”

The confessions about his sex life shock you. Of course, you know people have pre-marital sex and affairs are common, but you’ve spent your life in the church. You don’t hear of these things frequently, and you feel bashful because of his vulgar words. Tommy holds eye contact with you as he speaks, though you find it difficult to meet his eyes.

Your body betrays you now; you’re unsure how to react. You should be scared, you are scared. There is a murderer less than two feet from you, splattered with someone else’s blood. However, he has a soothing, gentle voice, kind eyes, and a soft smile. It’s hard to believe that the man on his knees praying to God is a monster, but you find it harder to believe that there is a heat growing between your thighs from his confessions.

The vivid images of Tommy with some faceless woman play in your mind. You imagine the way he’d look lost in pleasure, carefree and blissful. You imagine how his rough hands, which are currently clasped together, would feel on your skin. You imagine how his voice would sound in your ear, how his lips would feel as he whispers.

Your heartbeat picks up in your chest, a physical reaction from the fantasies. Your skin feels hot, burning with shame as you pray that Tommy doesn’t notice your current state.

“And finally, I’d like forgiveness for lusting after the church girl who was stupid enough to think she could show me the light,” he says, hands now dropped at his side and gaze predatory.

Entranced by his words, you didn’t notice how close he had leaned in, now only inches from your face. Your breath hitches in your throat and for a split-second, you think you see Tommy’s eyes on your lips.

“Sir?” you ask, voice no more than a squeak.

“I appreciate your efforts, dear, but I sold my soul many years ago.”

Tommy’s eyes are sharp and his grin is wide as he leans closer to you. He has lured you into his trap and you fell for it like a fool. Now, helpless and trapped, he is going to swallow you whole. Your heartbeat throbs in your ears, almost downing out his sweet, deep voice.

Tommy places his hands on your knees, and even through the fabric of your skirt, you can feel the coolness of his skin. The touch, although not sexual in nature, electrifies you. A shiver runs down your spine and Tommy must notice if the slight smirk is anything to go by.

“Are you alright?” he asks, a teasing lilt to his voice.

“Yes,” you choke out.

“Would you mind helping me?”

You furrow your brow, now much more hesitant to do anything for him. Your heart is still hammering in your chest and you’re certain you are trembling slightly.

“With what?” you manage to ask. Somehow, even on his knees below you, Tommy makes you feel small.

“I need something new to worship,” he says.

Tommy slides his hands down your claves until he reaches the hem of your dress, which he then pushes up to reveal your stockinged legs. He gently guides your knees apart and you allow him until you feel too exposed. You resist against him and he looks up at you with a questioning look.

“I-I can’t,” you say.

“You can lie to yourself, you can lie to God, but you can’t lie to me,” Tommy says, grasp still from on your knees but no longer pushing. “You want this.”

You look away, over your left shoulder as you try to hold onto any of the values you held before Tommy entered the church. You’re saving yourself for marriage, and even worse, you hadn’t formally met Tommy before tonight. There’s no love, no future, between the two of you. It goes against everything you have been taught since you were a girl, but he is appealing to the primal side of you. The side of you that slips your fingers underneath your nightgown after you say your nightly prayers. The side of you that allows your eyes to linger on the men in the chuch during service, even as their wives and children sit beside them.

Tommy is not putting the thoughts of sin in your head, he is simply tempting you to act upon the urges you have felt for years.

“You’re the devil,” you whisper.

“And you’re the fuckin’ Virgin Mary,” he counters. “You spend all your life worrying about what’s going to happen when you die. How about I show you what it’s like to live, eh?”

You set your jaw, trying to save a bit of your dignity before you give the man on the floor permission to debase you. You squeeze your eyes shut and nod your head, but that is not enough for Tommy.

“I need to hear you say it.”

You wonder if he is really concerned with how much you want this, or if this is just another power move. You swallow thickly and resolve yourself to the reality of the situation: if you want anything from the devil with the silver tongue, you’ll have to play his game.

“I want it.”

You’re Eve, and you have just been tempted to take a bite out of the apple by the snake.

With a wicked grin, Tommy presses a kiss to the inside of your knee and, embarrassingly, the contact makes you jolt. He removes your shoes, unbuckling them quickly and with ease, then placing them underneath the pew. His hands reach up your skirt to grab ahold of the top of your stocking. He gently rolls them down your smooth leg and pulls it off your foot before turning his attention to the other one.

It is unnecessary for him to undress you like this, especially when your stockings wouldn’t be an obstacle. There is something about being unusually bare in a church that makes you ache with guilt, and Tommy must know that. He seems like he knows everything.

He bunches the skirt around your upper thighs and he spreads your legs farther. This time, you don’t resist. You swear you see his mouth water when he catches a glimpse of your white knickers, pristine and perfect like a good girl should wear.

“What a precious little thing you are,” he grins.

Tommy ducks his head and drags his nose along your inner thigh until he reaches your clothed mound. He presses his face between your legs and takes a long, slow inhale like he’s smoking a cigarette. His fingers press firmly into your legs and you’re certain you will have bruises left behind. You should be upset about that but truthfully, you’ve longed for something like this.

Tommy’s fingers find the edge of your panties and gently push them to the side, exposing your pussy to the church air. Your breath hitches in your throat and you watch as he stares shamelessly at you. He swipes his finger through your folds to gather your wetness on his fingertip. He brings his hand back to show your desire glistening in the dim light.

“What’s all this?” he asks smugly.

“Don’t make fun of me,” you huff.

“Oh love, I’m not making fun. I think it’s sweet how worked up you got over nothin’.”

Tommy leans in again and his hot breath fans over your cunt, which now feels cool from being in the open. You shiver with anticipation as he nears, and your body jolts when his tongue makes contact with you. It’s a light, barely there touch but it sends an electric shock through you and elicits an embarrassing moan.

You hear him chuckle, but he doesn’t stop or say anything else. He licks a stripe from your entrance to your clit, then back down. Your hands twitch at your sides, fighting back the urge to grab him, not wanting to show how much you’re enjoying his torture. He knows, of course.

He works you up slowly, not giving too much attention to one spot, not making you too sensitive. You keep your attention focused on him, watching intently as he pleasures you. You don’t even feel the sting of his nails digging into your thighs when he sucks on your clit.

“Sir, please, this is wrong,” you try to reason, but your broken, airy voice sends a different message. You don’t want him to stop, you’d probably cry if he did, but it’s still wrong. It’s still a sin.

You hold on tightly to the edge of the wooden bench to ground yourself so you don’t get lost in the pleasure. Part of you realizes how ridiculous this situation is: a notorious gangster eating out an innocent little church girl. Another part of you couldn’t give less of a shit and just wants to cum.

“Mr. Shelby, please,” you whine. It’s unclear if you’re begging for more or to stop, but Tommy doesn’t seem to care either way. He’s going to give you what he wants and nothing more, nothing less.

He slides two fingers into your soaking cunt and curls them against that spot deep inside of you that makes your toes curl. He fucks you with his fingers and works your clit with his tongue, and you feel yourself nearing the edge faster than you ever have before.

You build up to your peak, and after a particularly harsh suck to your clit, you begin to cum. Your orgasm shutters through you, making your legs twitch on his shoulders. You let out an unintelligible whine as you grip the bench. Despite having cum, Tommy doesn’t let up on his assault. He continues to suck on your over sensitive clit until you’re shrieking and pushing his head away.

He chuckles and sits back on his heels, looking at you with a glistening face. He makes a show of pushing up his sleeve and wiping his face with the back of his hand. You want to close your legs to stop the cool air from hitting your sensitive cunt, but he is still in the way, keeping you exposed.

“Nectar of the gods in there,” he smirks, glancing down at your soaked pussy.

Without another word, he stands up. He picks up his hat and coat, and begins to walk down the aisle, leaving you alone.

“Wait,” you say, voice echoing in the church. He stops and turns around, eyebrow raised. “That’s it?”

“What more do you want?” he asks.

“What about you?”

Tommy chuckles. “Such a generous soul. I’ll take care of it myself, love. You just get to prayin’. We did a lot of sinning you have to repent for.”

You sigh and nod. “Will I see you again?”

“If I decide to become a priest,” he says with a smirk before turning on his heel and continuing out the door.

You know Tommy Shelby will never turn to priesthood, but you do have a feeling he’s found something in the church worth coming back for.

my inbox is open for requests!

[bromcommie]

tbh I still think Brock Rumlow was an interesting character and upon further examination way more unsettling a villain than most to me because like. Let’s be real, the second you lay eyes on Robert Redford as Pierce monologuing in his pristine suit and glass office high up in the sky he just screams Evil Politician! at you. You can see it coming a mile away. Meanwhile Rumlow is….Just Some Guy. On the surface, he’s just some side dude. He’s not enhanced, he’s not in some major position of power, he’s just someone who’s really good at what he does and seems dedicated enough to the work and functions well with his team. He respects Steve, might admire him even, but not so much that he gets starry eyed like everybody else. He’s lighthearted but focused, he’s no nonsense, he’s the everyman Steve can relate to way more than spooks like Natasha or Fury.

And okay, maybe what Rumlow does for a living is beat intimidate and kill people, but it’s not like that’s the primary objective, right, because SHIELD are the good guys and this is what Steve does now, too, anyway; except that Steve doesn’t really use any weapons other than the shield, he holds back, he doesn’t carry a gun anymore which is usually fine since he’s dangerous enough without it. But when that leaves him vulnerable, he’s covered: Rumlow’s got his six, and he does it well, and he earns some of his trust. This is familiar to Steve.

And maybe Rumlow’s a little too good, fine, maybe he shoots a guy in the head within the first fifteen minutes of the movie when he doesn’t necessarily have to and then cracks jokes immediately after but that’s alright too, because that guy had Steve at gunpoint and that guy was Bad whereas Rumlow is One of the Good Guys just doing his job, right. Rumlow’s joking around because he’s used to the violence, they’re all used to it, and this is just how it works. They’re just soldiers doing the grunt work and following orders, and this is familiar, too.

Except that they’re not soldiers and this isn’t a war, except that the work is for an intelligence agency whose job it is to hoard and steal information and monitor civilians and orchestrate and sabotage and meddle in internal and external state affairs. Except that the Good Guys, in reality, are extremely grey at best. Except that many of the Good Guys turn out to be Nazis on top of everything else, and it’s not that far of a stretch.

But when it’s all starting to unravel, you’re still thinking well maybe some of these guys didn’t know. Maybe they didn’t do it out of individual belief, and if faced with the right choice, they can be redeemed.

That is until you realize that Rumlow maybe didn’t respect Steve and what he did so much as what Steve could do if only Steve weren’t “weak” in other ways, if Steve had chosen the right side. That it not being personal is less a cop out and more a taunt the same way just following orders has always been, for Rumlow and many many men that came before him and will continue to come after. Until the vault when, by the most charitable of interpretations, Rumlow looks at the Winter Soldier letting himself be smacked around and crying and getting shocked like he’s maybe a little unnerved (if not just downright fascinated) by the whole thing, but not enough that it really changes anything for him, because the end justifies the means and it’s not really his problem, anyway.

Until Sam shows up and Rumlow looks at him like a bird of prey and says This is gonna hurt with a fucking smile on his face, and then you think: shit, man, obviously. How was it not clear from the start.

To me, what makes someone like Rumlow a good villain, even a side one, is not that he’s straight up Insane & Evil™️ or suffering from Tragic Backstory Syndrome or all hopped up on magic superstrength juice or whatever, but precisely the fact that he’s Just Some Guy with a cockroach survival mentality who operates well within the established system and just so happens to be really good at his job - a job that he might’ve even joined thinking it was for a good cause, or because he had something to prove, or simply because it gave him one hell of an excuse to be a bully. Because he either wholeheartedly believes in HYDRA or he just doesn’t give much of a shit either way so long as he gets his due in the end, and both are just as bad.

Because when you strip away all the grand scale superhero theatrics, you’ve seen this before. You’ve seen Rumlows in your school and in your neighborhood and in the military and the cop car patrolling your street. They’re the ones who sometimes say or do somewhat offputting shit but you figure it’s fine because they’re otherwise real nice or charismatic or normal looking, or maybe they work a job that’s framed as helpful or protective or inherently good despite the power dynamics at play, or they share your background and interests and you chat about the weather being crap this time of year.

And every time one of them turns out to be a violent, hateful piece of shit, you’re still somehow surprised then, too, when you really shouldn’t be.

[liveontelevision]

Suffer Pt. 3

Suffer Part 3 is here! I'm planning on having at least two more parts, I was not expecting this to become a whole thing but :') I gotta see it through now lol

When I say I love slowburn fics, I mean it dammit.

Disclaimer: This is my personal interpretation of the characters from Hazbin Hotel. I respect the canon storyline and characters, but this fic will stray from it a decent amount.

(This series is complete! All parts are listed on my master list and are linked below!)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6

♡ ♡ ♡

Holding a small, sleeping Charlie close to your chest, you swayed her back and forth. Your eyes fluttered shut, as you danced around the familiar nursery, humming the same tune you've used to calm her down for years. She was asleep. Safe and oblivious to any of the chaos around her. You envied her. With one final spin, you let your eyes open. Your arms were empty. She was gone. The comfortable weight of her tiny figure instantly went away. You panicked, the room you were in was shifted into something unfamiliar and uneasy. A source of light finally drew your eyes. A distant doorframe provides light, casting the silhouette of a tall, curvy woman. Her eyes were glowing.

“L-Lillith?” There were sounds of a baby crying out and the intimidating figure became far away, ceasing any light and drowning you in a darkness that you've felt before. Long ago.

A heavy knocking at your door forced you awake. As you sat up you went to wipe the sleep from your eyes, only now noticing the tears streaming from your face. Just a dream… The knock was louder and quicker this time, forcing a response out of you. “Gimme a minute! Fuck -” You roll out of your bed, going to turn off the radio on your nightstand. Having the radio on throughout the night was something Alastor suggested, obviously, after you confided in him about having a series of nightmares. His show is broadcast while you sleep, and when it isn’t, the radio static actually acts as a soothing white noise. It wasn’t a perfect solution, but it kept you from going insane in the least.

You finally approached the door, your body still wrapped in your large blanket that trailed across the floor. A cheerful, as always, Charlie stood at the door. She was quick to say good morning, but went straight to the point without letting you respond. She clearly practiced this.

“So! I know my dad's visit a few weeks ago was a liiittle… Tense? But - uh, I was wondering if you two talked yet..? By chance?” She spoke like she would be scolded for saying the wrong thing. You shook your head, still slowly blinking awake. 

“Well - okay! I was just asking because he.. keeps.. asking about you…” she held her phone out to you, letting you scroll through some of the messages he’s been sending her. You chuckle at first, he can't text for shit. But she was right. Ever since you blew him off that day, he's been asking Charlie how you've been and what you've been up to.

“I mean, I love my dad and it's awesome he's finally talking to me again, but - I don't know, if it's not too much to ask, could you maybe just.. talk to him?” Charlie rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly, and her words broke your heart a little. It's cruel of him to try and reach out to you that way, put Charlie through that distress, but maybe you could've handled your last encounter with more care.

How could you say no to her?

“Yeah, i’ll talk to him, Charlie. Don't worry.” A yawn interrupted your sentence, but you still sent her a reassuring smile as she finally relaxed her shoulders.

“That’s great! I’ll just give him your number!” She planned outloud, turning away to head down the hall.

“Charlie- “ You called out, “He loves you, you know that, right? Don’t forget that.” Charlie’s smile drooped for a second, then quickly picked back up. She nodded as she left your view.

With a yawn, your body still not registering that you were awake or what you had agreed to, you went to shut your door. It didn't click like it usually does, so you turned to see the blockage - Alastor. He'd stuck his foot in the door to prevent it from closing entirely.

“Good morning, my dear!” his voice was booming, as he threw his arms out in a dramatic flare, your door swinging open.

Nope, you were too tired for this.

“Fuck, Al, can't this wait ‘til I'm at least dressed?” You tossed your blanket aside, rummaging through your drawers to cover the little silky tank top and pajama shorts you had borrowed from Angel during your first nights at the hotel. Maybe it was your sleep depravity, or just the fact that Alastor has made it a habit to be extra kind to you since you arrived, but you didn't mind him seeing you in sleepwear. He had no ill intent, as far as you knew.

“Unfortunately, it cannot! I heard you're going on a little outing with the king! How exciting~” He hummed, sitting at the edge of your bed as you cover yourself with your sweater. You plop down next to him, still wiping your eyes. He reached out, swiping his thumb across the apple of your cheek. Looking down at his hand, swiping your tears across his fingers, he met your suddenly embarrassed gaze.

“Another rough night, dear?” You weren't sure how he knew that's what that was from, but you nodded anyway.

“Just another nightmare, it's fine. They're always about Charlie and - the mistakes I made when I was taking care of her.. I guess it still kind of bugs me.” He let out a pitied hum, as he stood to turn your radio back on. He tuned it to some old timey jazz music before resting his hands behind his back. You didn't know it could play music..

“Well, it seems that meeting with that royal menace may not be the wisest choice. Wouldn't you agree?” You looked down before letting a sigh slip from your tired lips.

“It's fine, I can handle myself. Besides, he keeps bugging Charlie and I - I feel like I owe her..”

you shake your head, standing to your feet and beckoning Alastor out of your room.

“It's fine! It's just a quick visit, I won't be gone long.” He took your hand give it a quick kiss, a reassuring smile on his face.

“Well, if he does anything to hurt you, love -” love? “- I'll be right there to help.” He emphasized the end of his sentence with a quick tap on your nose before leaving your room. The music faded back into static as soon as he left.

You heard stories about their fight, plus you could hear their aggressive duet from your room that day, but you believed him either way. You had no doubt he could swoop in and save the day if you needed it. You wondered why people seemed so wary around him. He was a perfect gentleman to you, even with all the warnings you've gotten from Husk and Vaggie.

He had you wrapped around his finger.

You didn't think you would stress about what to wear. You hadn't even made plans yet, but all of sudden, you worried about what he would think of your clothes if he saw you. Charlie sent you his number, so it was on you to reach out. You ignored it for now. You’d ignore it forever if it would keep these feelings from resurfacing. Finally deciding on an outfit, just a black turtleneck that left your arms bare and a skirt that hugged your curves in a lovely way. Even if it probably wasn't the easiest skirt to bend over in, you decided it would do.

A lot of your clothes were hand me downs or were lent to you by either Angel, Vaggie or Charlie. None of it was truly your size, but you had no problem adding in some extra panels or cutting things to your liking. The sweater you grabbed previously was actually gifted to you by Alastor. You had no idea why he would give it to you, a simply red cardigan with a soft knit, but it quickly became your favorite accessory. Pulling up the collar, you buried your nose into the knitting, taking a soft breath in. It always smelled of whiskey and honey, no matter how often you washed it.

You went through your day like normal, followed along with some exercises Charlie was running and taking a quick trip to Cannibal Town with Alastor, something you did every now and then. It started off with him accompanying you to the bakery, where you would occasionally lend a hand, then he would split off to spend the afternoon with Rosie. As time went on, he would ask you to join him.. It was intimidating at first, but Rosie was nothing but a sweetheart, you had no problem fitting in with the two.

when you returned to the hotel, you finally mustered the courage to call Lucifer. With a quick pep-talk to yourself, you held your breath before bringing the phone to your ear. He picked up immediately.

“Hell- Erm.. uhh.. Shit, how do I -” Did he realize he answered the call?

“Helloo? Lucifer here - speaking! Who-who’s this..?” He knew who it was. You assumed this was just him trying to be casual. He wasn't very good at it.

“Lucifer - It’s me.. can we talk?” You were gripping the end of your sleeve nervously with your free hand.

“Yes! Yes, of course! When are you free? We can.. figure something out, right?” You could hear him tripping over himself, kicking things around, and something that sounded like a squeaky-toy being stepped on? His excitement made you giggle. Even with pulling your phone away to try and prevent your laughter coming through, he was losing his mind on the other end of the call. It felt like a nostalgic punch to the gut. He didn't realize how much he missed your laughter until now.

“I guess i’m free whenever.. Charlie doesn't like doing exercises on the weekend, so -” A breeze hit your face, blowing all your hair past your shoulders. Looking to the source, a golden edged portal had opened right in the middle of the hallway. A fidgeting Lucifer was standing with his hands behind his back, a nervous but excited looking grin across his face. You looked down to your phone, seeing the call was still going, then spotted his phone sitting on a table behind him. You let out the smallest huff, before hanging up and tucking your phone away.

“Missed me?” He said suavly, wiggling his eyebrows at you. God, you did. You couldn't admit that though. Your anger, guilt and nerves overshadowed any joy that he may have brought under different circumstances.

“Yeah, let’s not get ahead of ourselves.” You rolled your eyes, beginning to step towards the portal. He reached his hand out to you, and he noticed you hesitating. “it’s uh- it’s a little bit of a drop if you step through the - um.. just.. wanted to -” you took his hand that he almost retracted, and carefully stepped over the border of the portal. You tried to keep your mind from noticing how your hand perfectly fit in his.

Static filled your core as you left the hotel, but before you could turn and see if Alastor was nearby, the portal had shut and the static ceased.

If he does anything to hurt you, I'll be right there.

Alastor's words rung through your head one last time. You finally met Lucifer eyes after literal decades.

“Um.. Tea?” Lucifer was fiddling with his ring again. Years ago, it was something you noticed he did whenever he was nervous. You nodded and watched as he conjured up everything needed to brew hot tea.

“What, you don't use any of the servants for that? Not even some angelic magic?” Small talk felt like it could make this moment less awkward. As he poured the already heated water into two teacups, he simply shook his head.

“Angelic power is great and all, but nothin’ beats fresh tea.” His smile was so sweet. You nervously balled up the sleeve of your sweater into your hand and brought it to your nose, breathing in the same sent that always seemed to calm you.

“And.. I- ahem.. I ended up finding other places for most of the staff after..” he said it quietly, unable to call attention to his missing spouse. Definitely a touchy subject for both of you. You finally looked around, realizing you recognized the tea room. It was small, but was walled in entirely with windows. It had a great view of the little garden that used to be brimming with difigured, yet beautiful, greenery. You took another look around the room, the nostalgia wearing off, taking in the dust and trash that was collected in the corners. The garden had died off as well. It wasn't completely unslightly, but the mess didn't make sense for a royal manor.

His words finally hit you.

“Found other places? What does that even mean?” You could feel your blood boil, watching him place the tea bags in each cup. You calmed for a moment, seeing that his hands were shaking.

“I just found places for them to work, is all. Sent the stylists to that Velvette girl in Pentagram City, some of the cooks went down to the Glutton Ring, ya know. Stuff like that. I wanted them to be taken care of.” He passed the cup to you, then pulled out one of the two chairs at the small table sitting in the center of the room.

“I just wanted to take care of them..since, I-I couldn't do that for you..” His voice was low, and when you attempted to look at his face he would sip from his cup or turn away. Don't be worried about him. He doesn’t deserve that.  It was all so long ago, it doesn't matter. Remember why you're here. 

“Good for them. Now, I'm here because you're bugging Charlie. Stop asking about me idiot, she's gonna think something’s wrong.” You placed your half empty cup down. He choked on his drink at your words, not realizing that you had seen the poorly written texts that he was sending to Charlie.

“And nothing is wrong. Right?” Lucifer scratched the back of his neck nervously, then opened his mouth as if to say something. He didn't. He simply nodded at first. 

“Y-Yup, right.. Everything's fine. l'll stop asking about you.” You went to stand, brushing the wrinkles from your skirt off as you did. That's that. You came here to get Lucifer to stop bugging Charlie and that's what you did. There's no other reason for you to  -

“Wait, please..!” His hand took a hold of yours, as he almost stumbled out of his chair to keep you from walking off. “I just want to say - “

“ - no you don't have to. It was a long time ago. Everyone makes mistakes, right?” You tried your best to keep your cool, but clearly it wasn't working. He winced at your words, releasing his hold on you.

“I have no excuse. I can't make it all go away, I still feel - “ he clasped his hand to his chest, struggling to figure out what he's trying to say.

“I'm sorry. I don't need you to forgive me, but please know, that I am sorry.” The room went silent, with your back towards him, the only thing you could hear was the beating of your own heart. Lucifer didn't know what to do, until the silence was broken by a pathetic little sniffle.

Dammit, not again. Don't let him get to you. Keep your walls up.

He quickly approaches you, his hands hovering over your shoulder, as if you’d shatter if he touched you.

“Nono, please, I -uhh.. I'll leave Charlie alone! I'll stop talking to you, I'll leave you alone if -”

With a quick turn, finally faced him. Letting out a breath you'd been holding in for far too long, you rush towards him with the intent to meet him with a long overdue embrace. The sudden leap left him staggering backwards, tripping over nothing and bringing both of you to the floor. “Don't you dare! H-How could you.. why would think that's what I want..?” Your words were muffled into his shoulder, since he had placed a hand over your head to protect you from the fall. Not even acknowledging that you were suddenly sitting on the floor between his legs, he finally managed to process your words. It took him a moment to even try and reciprocate the hug. He hadn’t been touched like this for years, it nearly overwhelmed his senses.

“ I want to know what happened that night! I want to know how you feel, or I guess felt, about me.. I dont care if it hurts, please tell me the truth..” all of the questions you've been asking yourself for years suddenly spilled out.

You felt absolutely pathetic, relying on him to tell you everything okay. But fuck, you needed this. Even if you never talk to him again after this, you needed some kind of closure.

“Woah- that's uh.. that's alot to drop on guy.. Uhm…” It wasn't like he didn't want to admit what he was feeling. With the relationship he had with Lillith, he had just become accustomed to not talking about himself much. That being said, with one look Into your teary eyes, he was all yours. He carefully took your hands from around his waist and held them in his own. He gently traced his thumbs along the top of your hands, letting you calm down before he went on.

“I.. I think about you all the time, I always have. I don't know what I would've done differently that night, but I'd do anything to take it back. To fix it..” The sweet smile on his face barely made his words sound better.

“I don't understand, Lucifer.” Your voice was quiet, and cracked a bit when his name passed your lips. You saw him jolt slightly, hearing his own name through your sweet, yet saddened voice.

“Well, I guess..Li-Lillith and I-” You both winced at the mention of her name. “- we weren't what everyone expected of us. And you were one of the only demons to know that. She- ugh.. I don’t know she left without a word, without a note - I have no idea where she went.” You felt like you were getting let in on a secret that he had been keeping for years. And maybe that's exactly what was happening. Your face went pale, your head swaying slightly, Lucifer took a hold of your arms and helped you stand, guided you back to your seat.

“It's not because of me, is it?” You said quietly, as if Lillith was just around the corner, ready to scold the two of you. Again.

“No! No, geez, if it has anything to do with you, then I'm to blame. Don't worry.” He still smiled at you, his face becoming strained after grinning for so long, then placed a hand over yours.

“Don't worry? Yeah! That shouldn't be too hard.. you idiot.” You rolled your eyes, but didn't pull away at his touch.

“I'll get straight to the point then, if you think I'm such a clown -” you couldn't help but grin at his self deprecating humor, and he's so relieved to see your smile.

“With you being in Charlie's life again, I'd like to.. I don't know, clear the air? Try and patch things up..?” You went to deject the idea, but he went on before you could.

“I know it won't be easy, and it's okay if it doesn't work out. But we all used to have so much fun together.. I think right now, it could be good for Charlie, and me, to have someone like you around.. I want you back in my life.” His little spiel seemed scripted up until that last part. Your heart throbbed. You were known to always decline help from people, avoid handouts, but the rush you felt hearing Lucifer say he needs you, you were almost swooning.

“Besides, we've both grown up! Moved on-  Right? I have all of Hell to keep an eye on, and you've got your little boyfriend back at the hotel so -” You wasted no time in correcting him. The idea of him thinking you had moved on with another demon made you panic for some reason you would never admit to. Why did he think you had a boyfriend? Who would - 

“Al?? Oh no, it's not like that, I swear. He's just been a good friend to me since I went to the hotel, is all.” 

“Al, huh?” He grumbled, leaning back in his seat ans crossing his arms over his chest. The warmth he left on your hand was immediately missed.

“Alastor, you know. The.. um.. You met him.” You held the sleeve of your sweater to your nose again, allowing the sweet air into your lungs. Fuck, he couldnt take his eyes off of you. He never wanted to take his eyes off of you, again. You just looked so pure in your little sweater.

But, that sweater.. something seemed off about it to Lucifer. He could feel some strange energy emitting off of it. It didn't come off as dangerous, but it definitely left him feeling uneasy. Like a headache that's just barely there, suffocating his thoughts. He's felt that before. It clouded his actions and judgements during his fight with-

“Hey, uh.. Be careful around that deer guy, will you? He seems pretty intimidating. Not to me, of course, but you know. Just in case.”

“Just in case of what?” You leaned forward, with your elbows on the table, propping your chin up. “Are you jealous?”

“Wha-What?? Of course not, I'm the king of Hell, I obviously trump him in every aspect.” There it was. There was that cocky, little bundle of nerves you used to know all those years ago. Everything finally hit you with the lost time, seeing that side of him.

“Lucifer, I missed so much. I wanted to be there for her, for Charlie.. I know I was just a babysitter, but there was so much more I wanted to do, so many things I wish I could've seen with her. With you, too.” You placed your hand overtop of his, just as he did to you earlier. He obviously wasn't expecting the reciprocation, flinching slightly at your touch.

“I guess I get what you're saying.. about taking that day back? That maybe if I didnt attack you the way I did, that I could be there longer. But… I was in love, Lucifer.” He stifled any giggles at the idea that you considered that kiss an attack, but nothing mattered after what you had said. He immediately flushed in the face at your words.

“In love..?” He barely whispered the words, his eyes sparkling. He felt a stabbing sensation in his chest, a familiar one, but still one that he hadn't felt in years.

“Yeah.. hm, it would've happened sooner or later, I think. I think I would've done it at some later point, if it didnt happen then.. I guess I'm just glad I left before Charlie could remember me. It all worked out, so - I guess what i’m saying is - we can try. Let's try being friends, again.”

What a bittersweet resolution.

“Okay. I'd like that.” He was fighting off any unwanted feelings. Burying any ideas to just profess that he felt the same way, and that he still does. That he wants to pick back up right where you left off. That he barely kept the longing, of feeling your lips against his, at bay. No matter how hard that was, things were looking up. Don’t blow it, Lucifer.

You chatted for a little while longer. You told him about your struggles after you were fired, all your interactions in Cannibal Town, the good and bad, then your eventual arrival at the hotel. The conversation lightened a bit, as you told stories about Charlie, giving him a much needed update on how she was doing when she wasn't stressing about a visit from him. You went on, talking about the other residents that he didnt have a chance to interact with last time. Obviously, that part of the conversation went into heavy detail about Alastor and all his little gifts and kindness.

Before you noticed, Lucifer held the edges of his chair, his hands gripping tightly into the metal at every little sigh or giggle you'd make in reference to something Alastor did. He'd dismiss it as jealousy for now. But that didn't stop him from rerunning that one moment in his mind. The moment where he was holding you. Touching the small of your back, just like how he used to.

The way you stood so close to him, that he could wrap his slender arm completely around your waist, and the confidence in your dismissal of Luficer's general presence. It was commendable, no matter the subject, he loved seeing your more confident side. Your words still hurt. The topic eventually came up.

“Oh god, Lucifer! I'm so sorry, I almost forgot about that.. I didnt mean anything, that was completely rude of me to treat you like that. I felt something come over me, seeing your face again, I just - I don't know, it was probably just some repressed rage? I'm sorry.” He quickly waved his hands, offering you reassurance in your actions, admitting that he felt he deserved it after everything.

“Don't say that, I was out of line. What you did to me doesn't excuse my actions.” You admitted. Was forgiveness possible in this situation? He had pushed the possibility so far down in his mind that a mutual respect seemed like an unachievable goal. And any reciprocated feelings were merely a dream.

This felt like a dream.

You asked how he was. He didn't hear that question often, so he didn't really answer with fun stories or anything exciting. His mind went into autopilot after you left. And after Lillith left, a lot of memories seemed suppressed. You asked about Charlie. He was worried you'd do that.

“Well- She uh.. went through her whole teenage phase, you know, goth makeup, boyfriends, a bunch of stuff she grew out of. She spent more time with.. her m-mother, though.. as she got older. But hey! Here she is now, doing the whole hotel thing, I'm very proud of her.” He nodded, clearly ready to move off the topic. But you weren’t.

“She looked up to you, you know. A lot. Oh man, she would cry for you all the time, constantly try to get into your workshop - as cute as it was, I wasn't ready to chase her down all the time. And i’d say she still looks up to you, Lucifer. You inspired her, I can tell.” You swayed the backwash of your tea in your cup, the pot was emptied long ago. Looking up, you see a trembling smile then watch him exhale a shaky sigh.

“Thank you.” He said softly. You couldn't stop yourself from leaning towards him a bit, after placing your cup down with a small clink.

Stop, Don't do this again.

Things might be different this time, but it can only go wrong in some other way, you were sure of it. Still, he leaned in as well. As you got closer, ready to shut your eyes to the reality and just let your fantasies take over, he reeled back, cover his nose and mouth with his hand. You jumped back, clearly embarrassed. He wouldnt call attention to it, leaving you to wonder what went wrong, but the scent from the sweater. It was disgusting to him.

“O-Okay, good catch up. I should get going, I - umm.. I promised Charlie I'd help her with something, so..” That was a lie. But if you spent another moment in that room with him alone, you'd have no control over what happened next.

“Oh.. right. Here -” He rose from his chair and opened the portal back up, leading to the same hallway you were in before. Turning back to him as he approached you, neither of you really said goodbye. Neither of you wanted to say goodbye. After an awkward exchange of trying to figure out if this should end with a handshake, a wave, a kiss - nope not that one. a kiss would be too much. But a hug?

Lucifer carefully placed his arms around you, encasing you close to his chest. He could feel your heart rate increase. The scent of your cardigan you wore overwhelmed him, but he refused to let go after feeling your arms lay comfortably around the back of his waist.

Good lord, this man hadn't gotten any in centuries. it took all of his strength to not trail his hands underneath that damned sweater and pull it off of you, feeling his way up your torso, sliding just the clawed tips of his fingers under your shirt until you - 

“Lucifer?” Your words were mumbled, your face pressed against his chest after he had tightened his grip.

“Hoof- sorry.” He quickly pulled away. You immediately missed the touch, but it was definitely for the best. For both of you.

“Well, Thanks for coming by.. you have my number..? Right! Call me whenever you want, I'm not busy-” Sure. The king of Hell wasn't busy. He just didn't want to admit that he’d drop anything he was doing if it meant hearing your voice. You nodded your head, taking a firm grip on his hand as you stepped carefully out of the portal and back into the hotel.

“I'll see you, Lucifer.” You said sweetly, he visibly melted at your words.

“I hope so.” With a quick wave, the portal cinched shut.

---

Alastor stood in the hallway, right where the portal had closed, greeting you with a stretched smile.

“Darling! How was your little visit? I wasn't expecting him to sweep you off your feet so soon, I hope it went well.” He approached you, tapping his microphone to the ground and leaning into you.

“You never called for me, I’m hoping he didn’t hurt you. Again.” His voice crackled and a high pitch ring made you cover your ears for a moment.

“No, Alastor, it was good! We're gonna try and work things out, see if we can be friends again. I think it went the best it could, if you ask me.” You hummed with a sense of confidence, strolling dwon the hall with Alastor following beside you. You didn't notice his eye twitch and his ears folding back at the mention of his full name. He was losing you.

“Just be careful, dear! We don’t want you to make any mistakes again, do we?” He had no idea what he was talking about. Right? You hadn’t told him anything.

“Well, it’s about time I run some of my errands. Let me know if I can be of service to you.” A signature greeting for you at this point, Alastor reaches for your hand and presses another kiss across your knuckles. He looks up at you the way he usually does, but he let his lips linger for just a moment longer. Shutting his eyes for a moment, he tilted your hand to place his nose against the sleeve of your gifted sweater, inhaling the scent and exhaling with a hum.

“R-right, I will. Thanks.” You pulled away from his grasp, his eyes suddenly shooting open. You pulled away from him. That hasn't happened before. He wasn't nervous, exactly. But he did disappear into his shadow, which darted down the hall in the blink of an eye, leaving you with nothing but innocent curiosity.

♡ ♡ ♡

To be continued! Stay Tuned ;)

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[eloves-writes]

💜 with carlos sainz!! could you make it spicy? it's ok if you don't want to as well it's your choice :)

fun fact! i can see you was one of my surprise songs at the eras tour and it is very near and dear to my heart😌😌 is this secret relationship trope overdone? yes. will that stop me? no!

song lyric prompt: “i can see you waiting down the hall from me, i can see you up against a wall with me” i can see you ~ taylor swift💜

warnings: kissing, reader n carlos being cute, slightly suggestive, oblivious charles leclerc

————————————————————

the whole press conference, you kept finding your eyes wandering over to carlos opposite you on the large sofa. he looked so beautiful today in his ferrari shirt with his summer break tan and messy yet perfect hair; this was the first time you’d seen him since the last race in spa, not managing to align your vacation plans but mostly not wanting to rouse suspicion if you were caught a beach together somewhere. the secrecy was fun and adrenaline pumping, it made you feel like you were in high school again sneaking around behind your parent’s backs- of course, the stakes were much higher due to your on track ‘rivalry’ with the spaniard. at least, the battling for positions and pushing each other off track was interpreted by the media as such; in reality, it was playful, teasing foreplay that you both enjoyed so much that the thought of getting caught and letting everybody else in on your little game disappointed you both immensely.

when the floor was opened up for questions from the journalists, hands shot up as usual and a question headed straight for you.

“this is for y/n and carlos,” the woman started, respectful in her tone which you appreciated after the shit men had asked you in the years since you started racing. “we’ve all liked watching your on-track battles so far this year, but we wonder if you two are coming in just as hot to the second half of this season, or has the rivalry cooled off over the summer break?”

she posed a valid question, but truthfully it was one you wondered the answer to yourself. had the heat between you cooled in each other’s absence? and if it had, was there an on-track rivalry without the off-track affair?

after a beat of silence allowing you both to think, carlos spoke.

“i don’t know about y/l/n, here,” he answered, connecting his big brown eyes with yours and making your stomach flip. “but i’m coming in just as hot.”

you knew what he was really saying. you paused for a second before answering yourself:

“me too,” you responded playfully. “carlos is a great driver, but i’m better.”

-

as you walked off the stage back to your team’s garage, a hand grabbed your waist and carlos leant down to level his lips with your ear.

“i’m good, but you’re better, huh?”

you turned to look at him, trouble in your eyes. “that’s what i said, yep.”

he grabbed your hand and swiftly dragged you into the ferrari garage without anyone seeing. pushing you up against the wall of the corridor, he kissed you feverishly and you kissed him back, welcoming the taste of his perfect lips on yours again and the gentle pull of his hands tangled in your hair.

“i missed you, cariño,” he breathed, pulling away from the kiss to take in every inch of your face as you did the same to him. you would never tire of seeing him so close up, admiring each feature like it was carved from marble. but it wasn’t; he was so, so real.

“mhm, you’re coming in just as hot,” you teased, quoting his answer to the reporter earlier.

carlos chuckled and nodded his head. “oh yeah. i’m definitely hot for you.”

his sarcastic tone made you laugh, leaning up to kiss him again. the kiss turned from sweet to rough in an instant, and your arms which had been previously draped around his neck dropped to hem of his shirt so your hands could explore his toned stomach under the red fabric as you continued to kiss him. his own hands fell to your ass, grabbing it in a way that pushed your hips forward into his crotch, earning a groan from the taller man.

footsteps down the hall took you out of your intimate moment, immediately removing your hands from each other and putting some needed distance between your bodies. you snorted when you noticed the semi forming in carlos’ jeans, and he lightly hit you on the arm for laughing.

“not my fault,” he said quietly through gritted teeth.

“you dragged me in here,” you whispered. “so kinda is.”

he hit you on the arm again as the source of the footsteps approached and carlos’ teammate came into view. he looked from you to carlos, suspicious.

“think you’re in the wrong garage, y/l/n,” charles joked, going in to hug you. “you alright? carlos hasn’t been trying anything with you, has he? can’t keep his hands to himself,” he continued, clapping his teammate on the back. carlos silently begged you not to start laughing.

“no,” you replied, using all your self control to sound calm and unbothered. “i thought i’d just come and inform him that i’m going to absolutely smash him this weekend.”

you smiled at carlos, milking the double entendre for all it was worth before leaving them both and quickly heading back to your own garage.

-

“you totally like her, mate,” charles laughed at his teammate once you were out of earshot. and carlos could deny it all he wanted, but he totally did.

[nurix0]

JUST FLUFF/COMFORT SCENARIOS WITH YOUR BNHA BOYS

characters: Bakugou, Midorya, Iida, Shoto

genre: fluff, confort

warnings: none, endgame Todoroki personally ig(??)

relationship: up to your personal interpretation

-he's one with physical touch or being a listener, not very good at words

- listening>>>>>

-he would be startled at first and don't know how to act but at the end he'll be "kind" (HIS type of kind)

-not the best at conventional comforting but he's amazing at his own way of confort

"The hell you're doing in my door at this time?" the blond complained at the sight of you in front of his door at 1am, he's normally not up at this hour but some assignments kept him up

You had a shit day and couldn't sleep, the only person you thought could ease things up without asking too much questions was Bakugou since well.. he was not one who cares to ask much anyway

"Can i just come in for a bit?" you voice was off and Bakugou definitely noticed that, now looking better your everything was different,.you didn't even look him in the eye, like your confidence washed away and this was the biggest challenge you ever faced

He rubbed his temple "Ugh, sure just don't bother me too much, it's already late" opening his door a bit more so you could enter, you went straight up sitting on the floor but the blonde contested "What are you doing?" you looked confused "You said not to bother so i thought —"

"Look, you can sit on the bed or something, just don't take much space" he was annoyed from how small your figure felt, figuratively speaking, you usually get on his nerver but not like this

You followed him sitting on the bed and stayed in comfortable silence for some minutes "What's up with you anyway?" glancing his way you saw his face a bit softer but firm as always, it was his way of showing he is listening, so you rambled for hours on end with his total attention

"You had it rough, just... you don't have to go back if you don't want to" you glanced at him wondering what he meant "Look... sleep here if you feel like it, i don't care" he bumped your side a bit "But if you hog all of the blankets im kicking your ass out, got it?" his playful rough tone didn't match the sympathetic smile on his face

keep it a secret but he didn't mind you clinging to him a bit at night (if it was too much he def pushed you away)

-He's def good a comforting, maybe gets nervous of what to do at first but he'll manage

- words of affirmation kinda guy

-good at comforting but not with advice

- won't mind physical touch but normally doesn't initiate it

It was dawn after a day at UA, Midorya finally finished his workout and headed to the dorms, on his way someone sitting on the roof caught his eye

It was you, that decided after a bad training to stay in your "safe spot" for some time to clear your head up "What are you doing here Y/n?" a concerned voice spoke, looking behind you saw Midorya with his soft eyes filled with worry "Oh, it's you. I'm just resting for a bit, nothing much don't worry"

The boy sat by your side "Anyone would worry about someone being alone at the edge of a rooftop" he gave a bitter laugh and hesitatingly touched your shoulder in an attempt of comfort "You can trust me to vent, I'm here for you"

That was when you lost it, looking down you started to cry your eyes out from all the stress and opened up about everything that was bothering you, Midorya looked nervous for a bit, like he was the one to make you cry, retracting his hand to himself on instinct

Almost instantly you rested your head on his shoulder, after saying everything his shirt was soaking wet from all the tears but he didn't mind "Thank you, you're the best, Midorya" the boy, unnoticed by you, blushed bashfully "Anytime, you're important to me after all" it was his turn to put his head against yours, hugging you for extra comfort

-What can i say? This man it's probably terrible at comforting, good with advice but definitely not comforting

-Def gives you some stiff hugs if, and only if, you ask

-acts of service>>>>

- Tries to stay more with you after the situation to help with anything (quality time and acts of service)

You didn't come to class for the day and as the class president it was Iida's duty to give you notes, the only thing is that you didn't answer the door or texted anyone, even your friends so everyone was worried

He was at your door "Hey, Y/n can you please open up? We're all concerned with your well-being and i need to hand you today's notes" softly knocking, again and again, but to no avail

He was getting frustrated "Look, im going to keep knocking until you open up. I need to give you these notes, it's my duty as a president to deliver them to you!" the door opened and your miserable self was right behind it, the boy was concerned right away about your well being

"What's going on with you? Are you sick? Do tou need me to talk to—" you cut him off "Look, Iida, i appreciate the notes, I'm not so good but I'll handle this with mr.Aizawa" you were about to close the door when the boy's foot got in the way

"You're not going to lock yourself in your room alone! You need assistance!" you denied his advances but he continued "Let me in, please... i want to help you" his tender voice made you feel safe so you let him in, physically and emotionally

Your dorm was a mess and you felt embarrassed to let someone tidy as Iida in at this state "Sorry, I didn't want anyone to see this mess, i cleaned up my desk today but I don't have any energy left to —"

"You sure look tired, get some rest while i clean this" Iida wasn't expecting to see this, he never even imagined you would let this happen, that's why he wanted to help, he knew you weren't in the right state of mind and that's okay, you contested but he insisted, and like that tou rested while he cleaned you room, you made sure to thank him later

The day after you went to him and thanked him, you even got a hug back huh

-I don't really think he even knows how to comfort someone

-Maybe he'll do something for you??

-It would be kinda awkward ngl

-He would try his best fr

-Says the most on point shit without thinking it means much

It's been a week that your quirk hasn't been useful for the type of training you're doing in class and that's been upsetting you deeply, either way, you couldn't dare to tell anyone, they seemed to go so smoothly that was embarrassing you were struggling

Today was another day like those and you were so tired of not being a "real hero", when you saw your score being the last one you couldn't help to excuse yourself to the change room the fake attitude of not carrying wouldn't last longer than this, but it was enough so that nobody noticed something was wrong

Except that Todoroki did notice, how could he not? You were strange all week but at the same time didn't look like it to the untrained eye at least, he could see past that facade easily, so he went after you

You were miserable sitting on the corner of the changing room, not crying or panicking, jsut wondering was this hero life really for you? "Why did you leave the training grounds like that?" looking to the side you saw Shoto, this unsettled you, nobody could know "Training was just intense, you know? Just tired" getting up you smiled at him

"I'm not one to pry but you know that holding everything in doesn't help, right?" those words hit you like a truck, how could he be so on point without knowing anything? "What?... Ha, there's nothing—" you looked at him as he stared blankly at your trembling figure "Seriously! I—" the stuttering didn't got you anywhere, it just confirmed what the boy needed to know

Realizing there's no turn backs form this you just let yourself be and opened up to him, Todoroki heard every bit and tried his best at comforting you, reassuring your quirk was good like any other, by the end of it he was glad he picked up on the hints, he knew how bottling up emotions affected someone, imagine from how long you would've kept this if nobody noticed

You whipped a tear or two that escaped "Thank you for listening, Todoroki, i appreciate it" now everything felt lighter but there was one feeling... "Hey, just don't see me as weak after all of this, kay?... " the boy looked at you softly

"Never thought of it, besides, opening up is a sign of strength", now completely relieved you and Todoroki walked out of the room right in time for the next class, it was nice having someone that knew you struggled and was there for you after all

[tonythr]

We need to talk about the Pale King's foresight ability

Ok, I waited a very long time to make this post. The story of the Pale King is my favorite aspect of the whole narrative of Hollow Knight, and there's so much mystery surrounding it that I can't not think about it on a daily basis. There are a bunch of questions left unanswered, and I believe that most (if not all) answers were left in the game specifically so that players could interpret them the way they think is best. So I wanna see what interpretations ARE there and maybe pick one (or two. or three. or all of them. or maybe really just one.) I dunno. Anyway, the point is, this is probably gonna be a long one. Big shoutout to anyone who makes it all the way to the end.

Now, enough with the rambling. To the point.

It all starts with the mushrooms.

The part that started all this train of thought was this particular line.

Unlike other areas of the game, Fungal Wastes don't have a boss that correlates with the area's native species. The shrooms don't have a higher being they worship. They don't have a civilization. They don't have a Dreamer. All they have is this big old mushroom elder that sleeps eternally with this one thought in their mind. All this to say that this line here is *probably* hella important.

The lore tablets of the Wastes also echo it.

So keep this in mind: when the Wyrm, reincarnated as the Pale King, started building and expanding his Kingdom (it's safe to assume that he started doing that AFTER he turned into his bug form) and got to the part where he had to make an alliance with The Mushrooms, they agreed to be a part of Hallownest ONLY because they knew that the Pale King had an ability to predict the future. Remember, they looked down on all the bugs that weren't part of their mycelium-sharedSelf-mindUnited thing. They were perfectly happy with their way of life. They didn't need the Pale King's gift of mind. The only reason they agreed to accept his will was because of his foresight ability. They assumed that, since he can see what's going to happen in the future, he will protect them (along with the rest of his Kingdom) from any possible danger. And that was a smart decision.

And yet, it didn't work out. And not just for them. For the whole Kingdom.

The main question is why.

From the way the mushrooms talk about the Wyrm, we can assume that his foresight ability didn't quite suck, which is to say that he really COULD see a big part of what's going to happen. So basically, we have two possibilities:

A. The PK's foresight didn't allow him to see *too* far into the future. It had its limitations. Maybe he could see what was going to happen in an age from now, but he couldn't predict *everything*.

B. The PK's foresight could reach as far as all eternity, meaning he knew the 'Eternal Kingdom' was doomed to fail from the moment he started building it.

In any case, Elder Mushroom's words suggest that, at one point, PK actually KNEW his Kingdom was going to fail.

And, since the most important part of his story is his battle with the Radiance (like, what else would the Mushroom be talking about?), I think it means that he potentially knew that the Hollow Knight was going to fail, but created and Sealed it anyway. So, the question is:

If the Pale King could see that his plan of creating an empty vessel to seal the Radiance would inevitably fail, why did he go through with it in the first place?

Here's the first, most simple answer.

He knew that the Infection was inevitable, so he decided to postpone it indefinitely. Hit the snooze button, but make it last forever.

Actually, that's not even an answer. This is just a straight-up fact.

Hallownest is literally frozen in time.

(Actually, I think it's so frozen that sometimes it makes rocks levitate)

The Hollow Knight's sacrifice was made SPECIFICALLY so the inevitable arrival of the Infection could be set back for all eternity. That's why the game has a big leitmotif of night and day.

That's why the Radiance's main goal is for the Dawn to Break. Because she's the Sun, and what she's fighting against is an eternal night.

But now we're entering the mystery zone. There are two questions about PK's foresight ability that have to be answered in order to understand what's actually happening.

Question 1. Does freezing time also freeze the foresight? If the Kingdom is left in a stasis without a changing future, can PK still see past that stasis? Could he see when it would end? If so, could he see what will happen after it ends?

Question 2. Is Time actually predictable? Is there just one timeline where everything that happens was doomed to happen in the first place, OR are there infinite possibilities and some room for the free will? If so, can the future be changed if one knows what actions will have what consequences? And if so, are there things that are actually inevitable, no matter the choices?

Whatever the answers to both of those questions are, I want to emphasize this:

Those lines spoken by the Radiance, along with the Elder Mushroom's words about a demise unavoidable, as well as some other things I'll mention later, make me think that the Infection and the Radiance's rise to power is an event that was truly inevitable.

Here, it doesn't matter if the free will is real or not. Remember: in the Pantheon of Hallownest, the Radiance ranks higher than the Pale King. She is a candidate for a God of Gods title, the highest of the Higher Beings. So maybe PK could shape the future with his knowledge of it. Maybe his foresight actually protected his Kingdom by preventing some bad things that he, as a Pale Being, had power over. But the power of the Radiance was stronger than that. She had the strength to assert her dominating will in every possible timeline, so that, even with his foresight, the Wyrm couldn't do anything to stop the Dawn from Breaking. After all, it's the power of Nature itself - the day always inevitably comes to replace the night.

So that's the entire reason the King decided to use the Void in his battle with the Radiance. The Forgotten Light had the ability to conquer Fate. But the Void, in his own words, had the ability to deny Time itself.

So, even if the Infection was inevitable, the power of Void could either prevent it, postpone it, or straight-up defeat it. I think that the reason for this is that the Void possesses a will that is stronger than any Higher Being. The Night and Day can follow each other, but the force that represents the End itself is beyond that.

So, now we're gonna ask the REAL question.

With the Void being able to deny Time, could the Pale King see the future the Void's actions will bring?

And for that, I have two facts that suggest that PK, in fact, couldn't at least foresee SOME of the Void's choices.

The first one is the fact that the game has multiple endings.

Look into those eyes and tell me that they're looking at something that could have been predicted and prevented by a dead monarch, albeit a godly one. The existence of multiple endings tells us that free will IS real, at least for The Knight/The Shade Lord.

Oh and speaking of dead monarchs, here's the next fact.

That man is fucking dead.

The Pale King's whole deal was to last eternally, right? To build a life that would ensure his endless reign. To achieve immortality.

So if he could see what was going to happen after he let the Void into the picture, why would he still try that despite it clearly leading to his demise?

The nature of PK's death is mysterious, to say the least. He didn't just die of old age. He tried to run away, bringing his whole Palace along with him to the Dream World. He tried to run away from something - probably from the consequences of his own actions. But even that escape didn't save him from being killed. And what killed him was most definitely the Void.

The throne room is dark.

In fact, it's so dark that the Kinght has to pull out the lumafly lantern. The only other room in the entire White Palace where that happens is the workshop, where PK worked on creating the Kingsmoulds and the Wingsmoulds. The space is filled with black smoke and black particles - the same ones that are seen in the Abyss and many areas that are located above it. When the Kinght strikes the Pale King's body with the Nail, it sounds the same as striking a training dummy outside of Oro's hut, which is made out of a lifeless husk. It's like the Pale King's body was literally hollowed out.

The form that was given to the Void by the Pale King to create the Kingsmoulds guarding the throne room is lost here, implying that it gained some other will that was beyond the Pale King's control.

And again, the only other place we see something like that is the Palace Grounds in the waking world.

...Which are located just above the Void Sea. Also, the same smoke and particles surround the place, and black tentacle-like vines reach inside the body of the Kingsmould containing the Palace.

No need to doubt. It was definitely the Void that killed the Pale King.

But what does it mean?

Well, here's some important info about the Void. It is a manifestation of this world's regrets.

If you look deep enough, it makes a lot of sense for the Void to symbolize literal regret. The Shade is a manifestation of the Knight's regrets about what went wrong on its journey. The Void Sea in the Abyss is probably the regrets of the Ancient Civilization's dead bugs. And the Void that surrounds the Palace Grounds and the Pale King's throne room is a manifestation of his own regrets. That's why he couldn't escape from the Void even in the Dream World. Because you can't escape your own guilt, your own darkness, your own regret. That's also the reason why the Knight has the right to sit on the throne after striking down the Pale King: it's because, at that point, the Kinght is set on a path that includes facing its own regrets, accepting them and uniting them under its will. Something the Pale King failed to do.

But the question remains: what exactly were those regrets that the Pale King was running from and that ultimately killed him? I mean, of course, it's the whole deal with the vessels that he regretted, but I think there's more to that. I want to lay down a list of theories about his foresight. Each of them can also explain which specific regret got him the most.

Each theory would also change the interpretation of this famous line:

...Which is important. Obviously, this line refers to the Vessels being sacrificed in order to create a Pure one, but, depending on the possible range of PK's future vision, it can have an additional, deeper meaning. You'll see what I mean.

But first, there's some other issue here that needs to be addressed, that makes this whole discussion twice as complicated. It's all about this one line:

So, here's another fucking question. Does harnessing the Void by creating the Vessels and the Moulds make those creations a part of what the Pale King could see with his foresight ability?

There's some kind of scale here that varies from 'There are multiple endings that depend on that one Vessel's choice, so that means the Void is outside of the PK's ability to predict the future' to 'The Vessels and the Moulds are the Void that is harnessed by the Pale King, so his future vision applies to them as well; it's just that the Knight gains the power to choose the ending only when it takes control over its own Void by gaining the Void Heart'. So, what if the Pale King could foresee that the Knight would be able to defeat the Radiance in the dream world? What if he couldn't see the Knight's arrival at all? What if he COULD see it, but his vision only applied to the events of the Hollow Knight ending, the only one that doesn't include the Void Heart? What if even the Embrace the Void ending was visible to the Pale King after all, as one of many possibilities he didn't pay too much attention to?

But the Knight is one thing. What about the Hollow Knight? Was its failure a part of the future PK could see? Or, since THK is a Vessel too, its choices were off limits as well? What about the Kingsmoulds? Was the fact that they would succumb to the Void that was going to kill PK available for him?

None of these questions have a clear answer. Probably. Or maybe they do. But there are multiple explanations for what was really going on. I'll try to present them as a list of theories. Each of them will give us a different interpretation of the Pale King's foresight ability's true nature.

PK didn't know what the Void would do but decided to try using it anyway.

PK only saw that the Void would help the Hollow Knight seal the Radiance, but his vision was limited (either because it was limited by its nature (option A, see above), or because the stasis created by the void limited his abilities (question 1, see above)), and so he didn't see that the Hollow Knight would break.

PK knew the Hollow Knight was going to fail but doomed his Kingdom anyway.

PK only saw the timeline where the Knight seals the Radiance without killing her. Every other ending besides The Hollow Knight was beyond PK's foresight.

PK knew that there were multiple possibilities once the Pandora's box was opened, but he saw that one of those possibilities was the Void successfully sealing the Radiance and/or killing her, so he decided to roll the dice. So he could see that Dream No More was possible, but he didn't consider Embrace the Void.

Each of these theories holds some interesting interpretations. Let's take a closer look.

I'll use a timeline to mark the possible range of PK's vision for each theory:

Just to clear things out: when I talk about what PK could or couldn't see, I mean what he could or couldn't see while using his powers at any point before his death. It IS possible that he saw some things when it was already too late to do something. That's what I was talking about when discussing possibilities A and B above (so maybe he saw that THK would break before he even made the Vessels, or maybe he figured it out only after it got sealed). Every theory accounts for that. It's complicated. You know what? Nevermind this whole disclaimer. I'll get to it.

Theory 1. The Void neutralizes the future vision

Basically, what this means is that once the Void got into the picture, the Pale King could no longer use his powers in any meaningful way. The Void, being a will that denies Time, created too many different possibilities for the King to account for, yet he decided to go through with the Hollow Knight plan just because he didn't see any other option.

The line 'No cost too great' in this case might refer not only to the Vessels being sacrificed, but to PK's foresight ability itself. The cost is his future vision, sacrificed to a state of uncertainty that might or might not bring salvation.

If this theory is true, the Pale King's story is a story about a monarch who, in his efforts to save his Kingdom from a wild force of radiant nature, accidentally unleashed something far beyond anyone's control and paid for it not only with his main ability, but with his life as well. Both the Vessels' and the Abyss' actions couldn't have been predicted, and that's why PK accidentally allowed for the Hollow Knight to break and for the forces of the Abyss to overpower him with his regrets about the countless children he murdered.

The risk he took is his main regret.

The flaw of this theory is that, if it's true, it means that:

a) The Elder Mushroom was completely wrong about PK being able to foresee the second coming of the Infection.

b) Harnessing the Void doesn't do shit besides changing its form. Even while being contained inside a semi-sentient Vessel, its actions don't bend to the Pale King's will or his foresight ability.

All in all, this theory basically means that both Pale King's powers and his judgment sucked, and the whole collapse of Hallownest happened because he was incompetent, reckless and stupid.

(That's why I don't like it)

TL;DR: The Void does what it pleases regardless of the Pale King's future vision, and he was stupid for trying to use it.

Theory 2. The Hollow Knight's failure was beyond the Pale King's future vision

This is probably a very controversial one, but it does have some interesting implications. The point is that PK didn't see that the Hollow Knight would fail, and so he went through with the plan thinking it was flawless.

In this case, the Hollow Knight counts as a 'harnessed' part of the Void, so its actions up until its breaking were completely predictable. The Pale King saw that the Infection would be sealed successfully, and that a stasis would be created. He got what he wanted, but at some point (could be any point) he realized that he didn't know if anything was going to happen next.

That could happen for one of the two reasons:

The stasis created by the Pale King literally meant that the time was frozen, which meant that nothing relevant wasn't going to happen unless this stasis would somehow break. But, while inside this state of stasis, the Pale King himself couldn't see anything beyond that state. What future vision is there if there's no actual future?

The future vision was clouded by the Pale King's inevitable death. It's possible that, while looking into the future, PK couldn't see the Hollow Knight breaking simply because his future vision doesn't allow him to see beyond the moment of his own death.

Anyway, what this theory suggests is that the main thing the Pale King didn't or couldn't predict was his own death. Or maybe at some later point he saw it was coming and tried to run away from it by hiding his Palace, but the Void got him anyway. It happened because the Void that destroyed the Kingsmoulds' bodies and killed the Pale King was a force beyond anyone's control an beyond PK's foresight.

A major proof of that is the situation with this guy:

Notice how they apologize directly to the Pale King, and how the Void slowly took over their mind. This guy was a royal retainer, which means the King probably ordered them to keep the lighthouse running himself.

The question is, why did he take such a half-assed measure to keep a whole Sea of raw dark power at bay? It looks so stupid! Just one lighthouse for a whole unchecked Void Sea? And just ONE lighthouse keeper who couldn't even resist the Call of the Void? Why such carelessness?

The answer is right here. That was because the Pale King simply DID NOT KNOW what the Void Sea was actually capable of, because its power (unlike the power of the Void trapped inside the King's children's bodies) was beyond his foresight. Without a clear answer from his future vision, he figured that this Void might or might not be an issue and decided that he had more important stuff to deal with instead of even hiring a whole team to watch one lighthouse.

So, while he managed to reach his goal creating a stasis that would keep his Kingdom lasting eternally, there was one thing he didn't account for, and that was the vengeful wrath of the dark force he dared to use as his plaything. The lighthouse was turned off, and the Void soon started to rise up through the rocks of the Ancient Basin towards the White Palace. The King tried to run, hiding himself and his Palace inside the Dream World, but the Void seeped in easily, killing the monarch. After all, the Kingsmould that was used as a gate to the Palace was also made out of Void.

If this theory is true, then the line 'No cost too great' could refer not only to the Vessels, but also to himself. If he didn't know that the Hollow Knight would break, then he probably thought that his Kingdom WOULD last forever, and that even his own death wouldn't change that. So he sacrificed his own life, gave in to his regrets about everything bad he had done, but managed to save one glimmer of pride, thinking that, even though he killed a bunch of children and abused the Void, he still managed to deliver eternal happiness to all his subjects.

But the thing about this theory is that now we also need to explain why the Radiance broke free despite everything the Pale King thought he did. Here, this theory divides into two additional theories (I'm really sorry for this long-ass post):

Theory 2.1: The Radiance is like 'Nah, I'd win'

Basically, PK's plan to achieve eternal life for his Kingdom at the cost of his own life was actually good. There was no flaw in it, and it should've worked perfectly. But we know that the Radiance might be a being that is higher than PK on the power scale. So, just like the Void, her actions might be beyond what PK's foresight ability could help him see. PK did everything right (not morally), but the Radiance broke through anyway because she's just... that much better.

Theory 2.2: The death of the King is what triggered the whole thing

Going back to the Void's actions messing with the future the Pale King could predict, I say it's possible that his own death, caused by the Void, is what made the stasis wear off.

Think of it this way. The Hollow Knight contained the Infection, but that merely eliminates the possibility of a HIGHER FORCE enacting some sort of change. Preventing EVERYTHING ELSE from breaking the stasis is the job for the Pale King himself. But, once the Void (another higher force) kills him, there's no one that could keep the stasis running, and it just... ends. That gives the Radiance (as a force of change, opposed to a state of frozen time) an opportunity to break free.

Or maybe it was the Sealed Vessel that was affected by the Pale King's death. After all, we probably know what its only thought (the one that ruined everything) was:

So, the Pale King dies, the Hollow Knight senses that a familiar presence is starting to slip away, which makes the Vessel panic (or something like that), and the Radiance makes her move, infecting its mind.

OR it could be both of those things! Maybe the Hollow Knight's attachment to its father AND the Radiance's insane higher power both played a role in filling up the power vacuum that was left after PK died.

Anyway yeah, that's it for this theory. The only thing left to discuss is the new interpretation it gives us for the line spoken by the Elder Mushroom:

'A demise unavoidable', in this case, refers to the demise of the Pale King himself. He didn't necessarily foresee that his death would lead to the destruction of Hallownest, but at some point he might've figured out that the Void was coming to get him but decided to stick with his plan anyway. But then it raises the question of when and how the Elder Mushroom learned about the Pale King's demise, and why they assumed that he could see it coming. That's the main issue with this whole theory: it just doesn't explain how the Mushroom's line fits into all of this.

TL;DR: The Void killing the Pale King is the only thing that he couldn't foresee in the long run, and even if he could do that at some point, the consequences of his death AND/OR the Radiance's actions were beyond his control.

Theory 3. Self-fulfilling prophecy

Ok, so now we're on the theory that I personally consider the closest to canon, or at least the implications of canon that we have. This is also the one theory that brings (some kind of) consistency to this whole question. This is because it explains the earlier question of how the future vision actually works.

See, there's no way the Pale King actually knew that the Hollow Knight would break from the very start, right?

Why would he doom his Kingdom when all of his actions were meant to prevent that? In fact, that's exactly the question that the Elder Mushroom is asking.

"Pale Wyrm... What good to foresee a demise unavoidable?"

Well, the answer here is actually kinda simple this time.

He saw it coming, and he tried to postpone it.

This is the simplest explanation possible, because we already have all the proof right here on the table.

The King sees that the Infection will come, and that it is inevitable (the inevitability is the key part).

He knows that, when the predicted moment comes, the Radiance will return and wreck his shit. No matter the timeline, no matter the choice. The flow of Time itself inevitably leads to the Infection happening.

The only option is to use a force that is able to deny time itself. The solution is to use the Void to metaphysically freeze the very flow of Time itself. The plan is not to try to change what is meant to happen, but to create a stasis that makes it so that it never comes to it. The timer never reaches zero. The eternal snooze button.

The stasis, however, dampens the foresight ability. If there's no flow of Time, the King can't see what's going to happen.

[A little digression: For the purpose of proving this theory, let's say that the foresight ability works better the closer the observer is to the moment that is being observed.

For example, while looking into the future from a point in time before a big war, the observer CAN see that the war will end on a certain date, but only when that date comes closer to them can they see HOW the war will end, and WHO will end it, and any other detail.]

The stasis wears off because of the Radiance's power (like in theory 2.1).

The King is finally able to see the exact nature of the Infection breaking free. He sees that the Hollow Knight itself, the Vessel he personally created to be the only key to the Kingdom's salvation, will be the reason everything goes to hell.

Wracked with guilt and regret, he escapes to the dream realm before the break happens so that he can at least save himself and his palace.

The Void makes a move that the King could or couldn't foresee, killing him. He thinks about the 'no cost too great' philosophy one last time before realizing that it is, in fact, utter bullshit. He dies with a feeling of everything he built crumbling to dust and his core belief being proven faulty.

The Infection breaks free, having harnessed the Hollow Knight, as inevitable as always. With the King being dead, there's no power to uphold the time stasis, which becomes the final push. The Vessel breaks.

Only then the Kingdom sees the arrival of a void being that has the potential to actually change things from their set course. The Knight, being a part of the Void that was beyond the Pale King's future vision range, enacts an end of its own choosing.

This ties to the game's themes of determinism, and flashes out the Kinght's strength to break free from the fate's chains, empowering the player and making the whole plot twist with the final battle against the Radiance even more epic.

The monarch who justified killing his own children by his desire to prevent the higher will from destroying his artificially made Kingdom has succumbed to a force beyond his control, becoming a part of a self-fulfilling prophecy. The chosen hair of its father's will becomes the reason why the inevitable finally happens. The only one who is free of obligations, desires and beliefs becomes the one to save the Kingdom once and for all, avenging the deaths of its kin. Beautiful.

And the Mushrooms who probably just didn't believe in the stasis from the start turned out to be right, smugly reminding us that it was always inevitable and PK couldn't do shit. There's no good in seeing a demise unavoidable, and it's foolish to make sacrifices to postpone it.

What the Pale King lacked was acceptance. The ability to embrace the true nature of things.

Something that is the main ability and the main character arc for the Knight, whose nature is to consume and to use its will to make even the darkest shadows become a part of it.

A little spoiler though: this theory has another variation that is even cooler. I'll leave it for the very end.

TL;DR: The King knew that the Infection was inevitable from the very start. He tried to postpone it. He failed, becoming a part of a self-fulfilling prophecy. When he figured it out, it was already too late, so he fled and was then killed by the Void.

Theory 4. The Masterplan

Ok, so, while the previous theory was probably the one closest to the canon implications, there are still a couple of possibilities that make this WHOLE thought process worth the time spent on it, because the mere CHANCE of this one theory being true makes the whole game feel even more nuanced. It's not even necessarily correct, but it's not about that. Team Cherry made the lore surrounding the Pale King's foresight ability vague enough for us to feel it's POSSIBLE that the whole plot was predicted by him. And that's how this narrative works: it allows the players to come up with different interpretations of itself, never proving or disproving any of the theories that it inevitably creates inside our heads.

So anyway yeah, what if the Pale King knew that another Vessel would usurp the Hollow Knight? What if THAT was his plan all along?

So, let's discuss a very important question.

How was the Hollow Knight chosen among other vessels? Why did that one child become the Pure Vessel while millions of others were left behind?

Well, judging by these lines and by the Birthplace cutscene, the trial to be chosen as the Hollow Knight was to climb up from the Abyss.

But why? How does scaling a huge pit prove a vessel hollow, and devoid of thought? Is it about the strength? Is it about not caring about other siblings who fall down? Is it about controlling one's inner Void in order to not succumb to the regret of the whole situation? Is it something like a sperm and an egg thing? A bug thing? Maybe it's all of those things. Maybe it's none of them. One thing we can assume, though, is this:

The Knight also passed this trial. It could have become the Hollow Knight. The reason it didn't was because the Pale King didn't see it and the Hollow Knight didn't care about it.

But in the end, it was the same reason why the Kinght became a more worthy candidate.

Think about it this way. If the Void is what is needed to seal the Light, and if the Void is created and channeled through regrets and past pain, what could be a better fuel for it than a father's abandonment and a sibling's indifference? Passing the life's trial but losing a chance to live anyway creates the strongest darkness, and that darkness is the reason the Knight becomes the best Vessel possible to do this task.

But it's not the only trial the Knight had to pass in order to qualify for this role.

(Notice the phrasing used in the Quirrel comic - 'ascend to that fabled land')

We don't know how it happened (Team Cherry teased us once about revealing it), but the Knight not only escaped the Abyss through some other path, but managed to leave Hallownest and then come back, purified by the mind-wiping winds. That's what Hornet says about it, too - she specifically states that the Knight's resilience was born of two voids: the one that's outside of the Kingdom and the one that's below it.

And we also know that many other Vessels attempted the same thing.

So basically, had any of them been more successful at the quest the Knight did succeed at, the Kingdom could have had a greater, if not near-infinite, amount of replacements for the Sealed Vessel. One Knight takes the Infection inside of itself, holds it in until the Infection inevitably starts to break free, but then another Knight arrives, answering its sibling's call for help, and the cycle continues. Convenient, huh?

Sounds like a thing some very perceptive godlike monarch could come up with as a plan to save his Kingdom.

It could ALSO explain why there are SO MANY Vessels in the Abyss. Maybe it's not about the White Lady being crazy horny. Maybe it was a part of the plan (which included the White Lady being crazy horny) all along. A way to measure up to eternity by creating an amount of heirs that no one would be able to count. Yes, it IS finite, but with THIS many spare Vessels it wouldn't really matter.

That said, there ARE some flaws in this theory. First, there's no live Vessels in the Abyss, so the ones that survived the Pale King's trial probably either died or left the Abyss already. And it's likely that there weren't too many of those who escaped, so maybe there weren't enough vessels after all. But then again, it only takes one to save the Kingdom for multiple ages, so who knows how that would work.

Second, as far as we know, the Knight was the only one who had the potential to actually seal the Radiance once and for all. Letting weaker vessels try to usurp the Hollow Knight would mean risking the Kingdom. But then again, that's what Hornet was there for. On the other hand, even she was surprised with how the Knight was able to defeat her, so either she didn't know about the Masterplan, or it was never real in the first place, and the Knight IS the one unique Vessel who has the strength to save Hallownest for good.

Honestly, I'm inclined to agree with the latter assumption solely because of the narrative weight of the Birthplace cutscene. I mean, there was no other vessel that was in the same position as the Knight. No one else had that same experience of passing the Abyss trial just in time to see the first Hollow Knight walk away with its father, who then shut the door in their face.

But anyway, this theory is still pretty valid. If it's correct, it would mean that:

a) The 'No cost too great' line spoken by PK at the moment of his death basically means 'Whatever bitches, I may be dead but Hallownest WILL last eternally because I had those Vessels ALL FIGURED OUT, and there's SHIT you can do about it now!'

b) All who doubted PK's plan are proven wrong, and the Mushrooms' smugness is worth nothing.

c) The Pale King's future vision is fucking OP.

...Whiiiich yeah, makes the Pale King look like the coolest mastermind in all fiction, but at the same time takes away the tragedy of his whole story and the uniqueness of our dear beloved Ghost Knight. Still fun to think about it tho.

TL;DR: The King knew that the Hollow Knight would break, so he had every other possible Vessel in mind as a replacement. The new Vessel would be the one who survived the Abyss, escaped, left Hallownest, and returned at the call of the previous Vessel. With millions of Vessels born, the cycle could have been repeated so many times that it wouldn't matter when the Abyss would run out of Vessels.

Theory 5. The Masterplan but cooler

Now THAT's what I personally consider a big stretch.

See, for THAT theory to be correct, the Pale King should have known the EXACT moves the Knight (and only the Knight) would take in order to defeat the Radiance one way or another. He should have accounted for things such as:

The Knight being left in the Abyss in the exact way that it was; broken mentally by the chance that was taken away from it.

His own death.

The Knight arriving to Hallownest, passing all the tests, getting the Dreamnail, breaking the Dreamers' Seals.

The Knight becoming the new Sealed Vessel in at least two of the possible timelines.

The White Lady gifting the Knight her part of Kingsoul.

The Knight successfully entering the White Palace, finding the King's corpse, and taking the second half of Kingsoul.

The Knight returning to the Birthplace, getting the Void Heart and uniting the Void.

The Knight entering the Hollow Knight's dream with Hornet's help and actually killing the Radiance by making the Void consume it.

I think there's exactly a 0.00001% chance of that being the case. But hey, it's possible!

Actually, I don't believe that. It just doesn't feel like that's what the canon implications are about. And then again, if that theory is correct, why couldn't the King predict the Embrace the Void ending? And I do believe that SHADE LORD wasn't on ANYONE'S bingo card at all (except for maybe that one goth bug who gives us the Shade Cloak). Or did the King just decide to risk it all by defeating one God of Gods by creating another, much stronger one? I really don't think so.

I think the Void's will, as well as the Knight's, has the nature to defy any type of fate or future vision. And once the Knight gains the power of the Void Heart, the future of Hallownest is entirely in its hands, and its choice is now inherently outside of anyone's foresight.

TL;DR: The King predicted everything. Could he predict the Shade Lord though?

Theory 6 (the secret one). The 'human' factor

Ok, so, up until now, I discussed the possibilities the Pale King had with his future vision, and how said possibilities could influence his actions and the history of Hallownest as a whole, with the Self-fulfilling prophecy theory (of which this one will be an extension of) being the most plausible one. There's just one thing though. None of those theories really accounted for the possibility that, at some point, Pale King could've just not used his powers, or, more realistically, used them but chose to do something despite the information he got.

But why? What could possibly make him do that? The literal God of Mind, not being rational? Sounds like something that Team Cherry wouldn't fail to include in the game as an emphasized plot point. A lore piece so important must've been given some significant place, perhaps even locked behind some insane platforming gauntlet...

I swear, this one moment drives me crazy.

The Pure Vessel. The Sealed sacrifice. The Empty God. The Hollow Knight was created to be the one and only savior of Hallownest, of everything the Pale King worked so hard on. It was created not as an heir to its father's throne, not as his child, but as a tool to win a war that had been going on for ages. And we all know that it failed because it gained a mind, a will to live, a desire to crave happiness.

And this moment at the end of Path of Pain tells us exactly how it happened. The Pale King, being a god whose main power is to give bugs the ability to think, shared exactly one moment of pure fatherly affection with his empty creation. And that's all that was needed to plant the seeds of a mind-conquering disaster.

And right now I want to focus on the Pale King himself here. If you watch the cutscene, you'll notice that he is the first to turn his head towards the Hollow Knight. He was the one who initiated this moment.

And one might ask: why? Didn't he know that that could lead to the Vessel having a thought that was terminal for the whole plan? Couldn't he PREDICT that him showing even an ounce of affection towards this hollowed-out child would ruin everything he built? His whole Kingdom, his whole dream, his whole civilization? WAS HE STUPID?

But hear me out. What if what we're looking at here is not the Pale King messing up his entire career as a monarch, but him actually achieving the only thing that could satisfy him? Think about it. Who knows how much time he spent in his workshop trying to harness the Void. Millions of his children were left for dead, locked inside a horrible bottomless pit as bones and shadows. Three of the Kingdom's greatest bugs agreed to sacrifice their lives for the King's plan. All so he could achieve what he considered perfection. The impossible ideal. All the struggles of this Kingdom led to the creation of that one being. And when the Pale King knew he had succeeded, there was nothing left to strive for. Finally, he could allow himself to be satisfied. To forget about the greater good. To forget the never-ending battle. To live.

To love.

And maybe at that point he refused to use his future vision. Or maybe he knew that this would ruin everything. Maybe he always knew. For that moment, none of it mattered. The god of mind finally experienced something that had nothing to do with rationality. And once that happened, nothing else mattered anymore. No cost was too great for this one moment.

And so, nothing that happened after that mattered as well. The King's radiant enemy would soon take his Kingdom. His beloved Queen would go into exile. He himself would not be able to fight the regrets of his dark past and would soon cowardly flee from the waking realm, only to be killed on his throne by the very power he so foolishly used to achieve his goal. But at that point that goal didn't matter to him anymore. He was ready for the eternal Void, because he had already achieved the only thing worth achieving.

Too bad that meant he would doom millions (if not billions) of live creatures and make the only being he could actually love experience the cruelest torture unimaginable. Too bad that, when gods attempt to achieve a higher ideal, countless souls must suffer. Too bad that because of that one achievement everything Hallownest was had to end.

But everything ends at some point. That's one of the main themes of this game, and the idea that I believe is represented by the Void. The Knight arrives to reap the sins of its creator, witness secrets sealed, bring some hope to a ruined land, and enact the end of an era. Only a silent agent of change is there to witness the dark consequences of the Wyrm's quest for happiness.

Neat theory, right? Now guess which one is my favorite!

TL;DR: The Pale King realized that the act of loving his child is worth sacrificing everything he worked for, so, even knowing that sealing the No-More-Hollow Knight would doom Hallownest, he decided that his life has already peaked anyway and that there's no point in trying to do anything anymore. He knew that he was cooked though, so he fled and died only with the closest circle of family and friends to keep him company.

----

The post is over now. Big, bigger, yet bigger, the biggest thanks to anyone who genuinely made it through to the end. My grammar is probably flawed as fuck tho, because English is not my native language, so please cut me some slack in that regard. I hope what I was saying there was at least somewhat cohesive. I also hope that the more obscure bits of information I used (like cut dream dialogue) didn't throw anyone off the thought train. It's probably gonna be a big deal when I release this post, so I probably will be coming back to it. Any discussion, as well as disagreement, is always welcome! Please just let me know I didn't write all this for nothing lol. Thanks again!

TL;DR: Skill issue.

[suosgirl]

Keeping It Cute (& Dangerous) - Hayato Suo x Reader | Ch. 1

Word Count: 2644

୨ৎ Read me before interacting!

୨ৎ Pairing: Hayato Suo x Reader feat. Haruka Sakura, Akihiko Nirei, Taiga Tsugeura, Mitsuki Kiryu

୨ৎ Warnings: mdni, f!reader, manga spoilers (?), blood, broken bones, harassment, misunderstandings, violence, fighting, grief, loss of a loved one, swearing, ptsd – if I’ve missed one, I apologize + please let me know!

୨ৎ Note: Hi! Ah – my first work! Ever since watching and reading Wind Breaker, I can’t stop imagining the idea of them running to stop a fight – only to find out it’s a strong, tough girl who’s ready for all the smoke (incredibly self-indulgent, as you can see). I plan to create 4 parts to this, so this is currently in the works!

୨ৎ Keeping it Cute (& Dangerous) Masterlist

Were you … okay with getting beat up by this gang? You considered it — genuinely. Perhaps, to love is to feel pain? For every punch they get in, you could take that chance to stare into their eyes. Every throw could be interpreted as a passionate hug. Every kick an extreme game of footsie.

“Looks like even pretty girls like you need to be taught a lesson,” his gruff voice spits out. He does his best to look intimidating, but all it garners from you is a low chuckle and a roll of your eyes. You throw your hair in a bun – tight and secure, before gently removing your jewelry.

You can feel the worried eyes of onlookers staring straight at you as you drop your bag on the ground - the soft thud causing the tension in the air to thicken. Pushing the sleeves of your sweater up to your bicep, you assess his frame. He’s 5’5, which would be useful for him if he knew how to use that to his advantage – but you highly doubted that his mind was as calculating as yours.

Although he seemed to have a good idea of how to position himself for a fight, you could see the uneasiness behind his actions. He kept glancing down at his hands as if deciding whether or not they were placed correctly. His legs were subtly swaying as he tried to ground his weight. It was clear – he was an amateur.

“I’d really love to see you try,” you say, tilting your head to the side with a smile on your face – if this wasn’t an invitation, you don’t know what is. 

And you were hoping that he would take you up on that offer.

You’d been trailing him since you caught him trying to take an up-skirt photo of you a couple of stores down the street. Idiot, you thought bitterly, the safety shorts underneath proved to have been a smart choice when you dressed for the day. But… the fact that you had to even prepare for situations like this by dressing “appropriately” made the annoyance you felt bloom into anger. 

When you noticed his actions, you immediately grabbed his wrist in a tight hold – your manicured nails digging into the soft skin. 

Although the store wasn’t packed, you didn’t want to bring attention to the situation. This wasn’t your first time experiencing a degenerate like this, and you weren’t sure if it would even garner a response from anyone around you.

You were used to dealing with this on your own. This time would be no different.

“I was just in here to buy some pens -you perv,” you muttered as your eyes flashed dangerously into his. You could see a sheen of sweat on his forehead and the slight quiver of his bottom lip.

Pathetic. Did he really think you wouldn’t notice his constant presence behind your back, or the fact that the brightness of his screen allowed for a clear view of the camera app he was on?

As a result of your grip, he had dropped his phone. You grabbed it before standing up, making sure to scan his camera roll for any other indecent pictures and permanently deleting them before shoving it back into his chest - a firm grip still holding him close to you. 

You pulled him even closer, forcing him to bend down a bit so that you could speak in his ear.

“Cut that shit out,” you said softly, but the warning was still there. The grip on his wrist was tightened even more - and you were sure that if you were to look down, you’d see small spots of red forming underneath your nails. 

Once released, he simply scoffed as if you had inconvenienced him, and stormed out of the store. 

You had thought that was the end of it and continued on with your shopping. But, as you made your way down the street, you saw him in another store doing the same thing to another unsuspecting victim. 

Sighing, you waited until he left the store to confront him - but he was fast and efficient as he weaved his way through the foot traffic on the street. 

Eventually, you were able to catch up to him - with a firm kick to the back of his knees.

That all leads to the present — you’re surprised by how quickly the once bustling street has cleared out. But, you notice warily that you’re not alone. The people of the town are watching you, and you’re not sure why.

You can faintly hear the whisper of someone on the phone, and you’re just able to make out “…come here now…” before the street falls silent. 

“I’d better get started before those Bofurin punks get over here,” the man sneers, and you cock your head to the side in confusion. 

You knew that moving to a new town would require some adjustment, but it was your first time hearing the name — Bofurin. Were they another gang? You’d heard about the rumors of the violence that occurred in the town of Makochi and their dislike for outsiders, so you were always careful to keep your head down and your responses to a minimum when you were outside of your apartment.

“Bo-who?” you try to ask, but the man has already started charging towards you, his right arm raised above his head and his hand in a tight fist.

You take in his fast approach and easily sidestep him. 

“Oh… you’ve never been in a fight, have you?” you taunt, faux concern on your face as he stumbles to a stop and whips back around to face you in confusion.

“Lucky break,” he huffs out, spitting on the ground next to him before raising his fists again.

You nod in agreement, though your eyes tell a different story. They’re narrowed and icy, observing every little move he makes. 

“You’re probably right… why don’t you try again?”

That gets a reaction out of him - he charges again, somehow even faster than before, but this time you race to meet him halfway. He goes to punch for your head, but you’re faster — immediately ducking under his arm and instead getting a good hold underneath his armpit and shoulder as you swing your body onto his back. You use the momentum of your run to raise your legs up and around his neck, crossing them at the ankles behind his head.

He stumbles under the sudden weight and desperately tries to grab at your back to get you off. 

Lucky break my ass, you think bitterly.

With your legs tight around his neck, you let go of the grip in your hands, bracing your core and swinging yourself around again before ultimately using that same momentum to flip him over and throw him to the ground on his back.

You’re not dumb — this definitely won’t be enough to render him unconscious. But, with so many witnesses, you’re afraid to do any serious damage. You didn’t want to get driven out of another town again because of your violent streak, and while it was simple to fight one-on-one with a weak opponent, you weren’t keen on pushing your luck with a whole gang. 

So, ultimately, you decide that this is a good enough scare for the poor guy — because you were capable of doing so much worse. You leisurely walk up to his gasping form, all the air in his lungs effectively pushed out when he landed flat on his back.

Looking down, you can see the fear in his eyes and the pain on his face. You note the way his body tenses and the way his fingers shake once you crouch down closer to him — as if he was willing for his body to move but simply didn’t have the strength to do so. 

“Have you learned your lesson?” you ask — but this time you drop the facade. No smiles, no taunting — your question is direct and your face is devoid of emotion. 

You were giving him an out — any fool could see that. But this guy just simply couldn’t take the blow to his ego, and you felt exasperated when he answered with, “What lesson, bitch?”

Figures.

You tutted your tongue as you stood up. Fine, to hell with the people and the town and the Bofurin gang. You could move towns — you’d done it once, you could do it again. But this guy — he needed a rude awakening and you were more than happy to serve it to him on a silver platter. It’s what your brother would’ve done anyway– that thought reassures you.

“I see,” you sneer, “In that case, I’d love to do a crash course with you, motherfuc-“

“Oi — what’s going on here?”

Damnit. You were really looking forward to beating this guy down — but now you have to admit defeat and retreat because no way are you taking on a whole gang by yourself. 

“Do you … need some help?” the voice presses on, and you feel your body heat up at the mere question.

No way – did this guy have backup? Perverts stick together, you suppose.

When you turn to face the unknown voice, you’re surprised it’s only a group of 5 guys. 

Right away, you note that this group couldn’t possibly be with the man currently gasping by your feet – if the way he’s trying to inch away is anything to go by.

Still … you warily take in their appearance and note the matching uniforms that they have on. Do gangs in Makochi wear uniforms? Is that, like — a thing? Also — why are they so … good looking?

For a split second, your brain fizzles out. You are, after all, just a girl.

Were you … okay with getting beat up by this gang? You considered it — genuinely. Perhaps, to love is to feel pain? For every punch they get in, you could take that chance to stare into their eyes. Every throw could be interpreted as a passionate hug. Every kick an extreme game of footsie.

You size them up again, this time not as threats but instead as potential love interests. 

They’re all fairly taller than you — perfect. 

Muscular and strong? Seemingly so.

Great personalities? Um.

You would have to put a pin on that one.

Your eyes are immediately drawn first to the one with pink hair and a brightly patterned shirt. The piercings on his face make you blush – they look so good on him that it quite literally takes your breath away. The way his hair is clipped back makes you wonder what other hairstyles he’s capable of doing – and, as an afterthought, you wonder if his hair smells as good as he looks.

The next one is tall, with his orange hair secured by a white fabric headband. You note his wrist wraps and the kneepad on his leg, as well as the slippers he has on. What kind of fighting does this guy do? His face, though, strikes you as good-natured – and now you’re confused because what is a guy like this doing in a gang? 

You breeze over this minor question and move on to the next. This guy — whoa. Black and white hair split down the middle, with heterochromia eyes. This guy is so cool. But his face is all — pink? Maybe it’s a skin condition? And he’s in a gang too? You begin to worry about his health – unaware of the exasperated looks he’s throwing at you.

He says something to you. Was this the guy who spoke up earlier? You’re way too deep in your thoughts to register anything he said. You do notice, however, that his eyes are still on yours. 

Is it — is it you? Is there something on your face? For a split second, you worry about your complexion — completely forgetting the fact that you have the body of a wheezing man laid out on the ground next to you.

Slightly behind him, you notice a guy with blonde hair and worried eyes. Like a golden retriever — cute. Weird though, this one seems more frantic than the others. Maybe he’s just joined their gang? You ponder on this as your eyes flit to the next person in line and — 

Oh. Oh.

Who is he? One eye is covered by an eye patch — the visible one, though, is warm brown in color and painted with curiosity. Your gaze follows down his long tassel earrings to his calm smile, and you’re pretty sure that your eyes have glazed over.

The lights are on but nobody’s home.

Him — I want to be pummeled by him. 

“What’s your problem? Hello? Helloooo?”

“Maybe she’s not talking … on purpose? Is it a strategy?”

“... I don’t think that’s it, Nire-kun.”

The cherry blossoms surrounding your vision and the romantic tune playing in the back of your mind come to a screeching stop. 

Monologue = stopped. 

Dreams = shattered. 

You flush at the realization that you’d probably been staring at them for a good minute or two — in complete silence. If the ground were to swallow you up at that moment, you’d gladly let it happen. No way in a thousand years did you ever think that you’d stop mid-fight to daydream about your opponents. 

You can almost feel the flick against your forehead that your brother undoubtedly would’ve done – along with his nagging about not being focused and present during a fight.

God, what is this town doing to you?

You blink your eyes back into focus and your lips part as you draw in a quick breath to quip back, ”I’m BUSY right now — I can’t FIGHT you until I educate this guy firs-“

“BEHIND YOU, HE-,“ the blonde one yells out frantically, finger-pointing at the shadow that just breached your peripheral vision.

Damn.

You’re immediately pulled into a chokehold, one of his arms wrapped tight around your neck, and the other holding your head in place. 

From the close proximity, the man is just barely able to hear you muttering under your breath.

“What was that darling? You askin' for forgiveness?” he laughs out, his hold tightening even more and his spit hitting the back of your ear.

You can see that the Bo-something guys are moving towards you, but that infuriates you. How dare they join forces with this pervert to attack one single girl? No way were you letting that happen — not on your life. 

You would rather die than let a man get the satisfaction of beating you. 

You reach your arms up, locking your fingers behind his neck. Just for shits and giggles, you dig your nails hard into the soft skin, leaving red-dotted crescent marks in your wake.

“I said I wasn’t done TALKING!” you yell, before swinging your legs up and bringing them down fast to plant your feet square on the ground. The momentum causes him to stumble and loosen his grip around your neck and head, and with the strength in your thighs and your arms and good ol’ gravity, you flip him again.

He lands flat on his back once more, and you take that chance to finish him off — by slamming your foot down onto his hand. The same hand that started this whole ordeal. The hand that, at that moment, you decided would serve as his lifetime reminder of the consequences of his actions. 

You hear his yowls of pain before you feel the give in his wrist. 27 bones are in the human hand — you had to have broken at least one. You release your foot, and he immediately curls into a fetal position — his hand limp and hanging from his wrist as he cradles it into his chest.

Correction — you definitely broke more than one.

You glance up and see that all 5 guys have stopped in their tracks, varying levels of shock displayed on their faces.

No more games and no more daydreaming – it was time to get serious.

You drop into a fighting stance, your arms raised and your hands in fists. You crack your neck and roll back your shoulders, a dangerous smile on your lips.

“Who’s next?”

-

୨ৎ Chapter 2

[hedgehog-moss]

A post about Pirlouit’s debut as a noble steed! (Part II)

Our destination for this first trip on donkeyback was the nearest farm on the plateau (+ the three houses which together with it form a small isolated hamlet), to say happy new year to these neighbours. It’s not very far when I go with Pandolf because we take a shortcut through the forest and then straight across the plateau (patchworked with small pastures), slipping under every fence. But my donkey is too dignified to crawl under fences, so we had to take the road, which is a longer but also very nice itinerary. There are maybe 3 cars per day on average, but it’s a snowplough-forsaken road so in winter it’s basically zero (except the postwoman).

I wasn’t riding him at first because he didn’t want me to—I tried and he instantly stopped and turned back towards his pasture. I think he was a bit nervous about being on the road, and preferred to follow another animal. I was saying in the previous post that I started riding him in the past year, but as I don’t have a bridle for him and he’s terrified of riding crops (or any sticks), it’s hard to make him do things he doesn’t want to do (I suspect it would be hard anyway).

So my strategy has been to treat him less like a car and more like a bus—i.e. I hop on when he’s going somewhere I also want to go. My first attempts to do so were when we were at one end of his pasture and he saw the llamas at the other end looking interested in something (food?? visitor?) and wanted to check it out too (visitor = scary, but could be bringing food. Worth having a closer look.) At first Pirou was like uhhhh no and just stopped walking when he realised he had a hitchhiker on his back, but after a while he started tolerating me for these short trips across the pasture.

Step 2 was taking him on a walk (by foot) in the woods behind my house, letting him eat brambles and clean up the place along the way, and when he started showing signs of wanting to return to his pasture I’d climb on his back like “don’t mind me, live your life!” and he would grudgingly resume walking like okay, since you’re not making me do anything you can stay.

Then I started tying his rope to the side buckles of his halter so I could tug his head left or right (+ encouraging leg squeezes) and make gentle itinerary suggestions. When he was in the mood for it we could do little slaloms around trees; when he wasn’t (if it was too close to dinner time) he’d just ignore me and dash straight ahead so the llamas wouldn’t eat all the hay. (I’ve tried to explain to him that there will be no hay if I’m not here to give it, and his FOMO is based on a fundamental misunderstanding of my role in his life, but to no avail.)

He still very much interprets my tugs on the ‘reins’ and hip- or leg-based indications re: direction and pace as humble opinions from his rider that he has the power to veto since he’s the one walking after all, and I think that’s fair. It wasn’t a problem for our trip to the farm because there’s just one road to go there, all you have to do is follow it without any directional fine-tuning. After a while walking on that perfectly quiet road without coming across a single car, Pirlouit started looking more confident and I tried to hop on his back again, and this time he was like pfff okay, and kept walking :) But from then on he viewed himself as the de facto leader of our trip. His first executive decision was to walk on the side of the road, where there’s grass under the snow, rather than on the snowy asphalt—I think he worried about hidden patches of ice.

Sometimes he’d stop for a few minutes to contemplate the horizon and think about life. I figured he’d walk faster and maybe even trot once we were on our way back and dinnertime was approaching, so I didn’t mind the leisurely pace.

At one point he wandered off the road and I dismounted to lead him back in the right direction, but then realised he’d heard water sounds and had decided to stop for a drink in this rivulet. I was like “there’s a communal water trough at the hamlet but you don’t know that, so, okay.” But when we got there, the trough turned out to be frozen so Pirlouit was right to play it safe!

He also stopped every so often for a snack, I assume following the same approach of “better safe than sorry, I might never find food again.” I had a book in my coat pocket so I would read a few paragraphs while he ate. He always picked the thorniest bushes and prickliest brambles he could find. I ended up getting the feeling he was showing off a bit—maybe donkeys dare each other to eat thorny bushes the way humans do with spicy food.

I dismounted again to take a picture here because this rare, straight portion of the winding road really made me wish I had a sleigh! Imagine Pirlouit all festooned with bells too, he would hate it <3

As we found the first pasture that belongs to my farmer neighbour, Pirlouit stopped, looking mesmerised. Maybe it smelled good? He stood there for a bit like “Look! A mountain of hay bales! This road led to donkey heaven and I had no idea”

When we reached civilisation (i.e. 3 houses) I dismounted for good as Pirlouit got very hesitant. He’d forgotten the existence of houses that aren’t ours.

He was also a bit terrified by the concept of chickens that aren’t ours. He refused to take a single more step in the direction of Unknown Chickens so I ended up backtracking and tying him to a post next to a suitably thorny bush, before going on my social visits.

I used to know the farmer on the plateau because Pampe eloped to his farm a lot when she was a kid, but then he retired and sold his farm to a young couple, and I kept thinking, “Well I’ll meet them next time Pampe escapes” but she never escaped that far again! So I finally met the new neighbour (I only met the guy, his wife wasn’t here) six months after he arrived, and I explained my llama-based reason for not visiting sooner, and he basically said “yeah I’ve heard about your llama menace. I’ll be happy to meet her if she ever feels like hiking all the way to my farm again!” He was very nice. I also went to wish a happy new year to the other neighbours but only one of them was home. I left my New Year card featuring baby Poldine at the other two houses—I placed one of them in a garden gnome’s hands which made me feel like an Austen character paying calls and leaving calling cards to the servant.

Pirlouit was quiet and patient at first, but then he finished eating his shrub (I assume) and started braying indignantly. Clearly I had left him here to die of exposure while I feasted inside a warm house and it was getting late and he was going to miss hay o’clock and he was the loneliest saddest hungriest donkey in the whole world and oh, you’re here! (stops mid-bray)

He was very eager to go home before the llamas ate all the hay (again—without me there’s no—oh, never mind) and didn’t even stop to grumble when I climbed on his back again, he was like fine whatever but HURRY!, and walked at record speed on the way back. But didn’t trot, because icy ground.

He didn’t stop to contemplate the horizon and his place in the universe this time around, but I still managed to capture some lovely pink and gold skies here and there :) (and the fires of Mordor after the sun disappeared for good) (and then it got really cold and Pirou & I were united in our haste to get home.)

[rileyslibrary]

How about this: After some especially rough missions, Ghost is on edge, his mental health hanging by a thread. Of course he doesn't admit it and powers through training and everything, but everyone knows he needs help, something to balance him out again.

Even the doctors are on their wits ends with him at this point, so they try a new approach and assign him to some animal assisted therapy. OF COURSE he hates the idea - waste of time and he is fine anyway...

So reader and their animal are invited to base to try and help him. (Or reader is the team mate, and the therapist an additional character - how ever, you know best.) I'll leave to you which animal it will be. ;-)

Ghost & Peppa (the dog)

Anon, hold my purse while I fill this with warnings:

Brief mentions of war

Mentions of physical & emotional trauma

This story is purely fictional and should not be considered an accurate representation of the practices and/or effects of Animal-Assisted Therapy

I did NOT cry while writing this. I’m fine.

——————————————————————

He’s fine. Of course, he is.

Nothing wrong with collecting mutilated bodies after a bomb explosion—It’s part of the job.

What about him getting shot? Ah well, it got him on his shoulder—that doesn’t count. It wasn’t life-threatening, according to him. He was fine.

He had to talk to someone. You all tried to pass the idea to him. Everyone except Gaz, who didn’t want to get involved since he, too, was going through some shit.

Soap told him straight away. “Mate, you need to talk to somebody”.

“I got nothing to say”, was his response.

Price was more subtle. Such a tactful guy, your captain. He tried to bring the subject up by sharing his own therapy experiences.

“Opening up and feeling vulnerable was difficult,” he said, “but I pushed through.”

But all he received was a shrug and a stern “glad it worked out for you. I’m fine.”

And you? You tried to cheer him up, calm him down, make him talk.

Nothing.

For the past two months, he has been training daily, hitting that punchbag and bench pressing like a maniac. He was pushing his physical limits, attempting to lift barbells equal to his weight, and you were looking at a person struggling to lift the weight of his conscience.

But he was fine.

Until Gaz came one day and pitched an idea to the captain: “Animal-assisted therapy” they called it. The doctors assigned it to him, and it helped. So, why not give it a try with Ghost?

The lieutenant hated the idea. Hated it. Why? Because “it was pointless and stupid” to him.

Plus, he was fine.

But Price placed his thumbs under his shoulder straps and told him it was an order. And nobody messed with the captain when he put his thumbs under his shoulder straps.

The therapist arrived the following week with Peppa, the dog.

“Peppa, like the pig?”

That was Ghost’s first question. And upon the therapist’s first nod, the follow-up question came.

“Why the fuck would you name the dog Peppa?”

The therapist explained that Peppa’s first patient was a little girl who struggled with anxiety. She named her Peppa after the cartoon character, and the name stuck.

Days turned into weeks, and although he initially protested against the therapy sessions, he was now willingly participating in them. Almost looking forward to them.

“Can’t come to training today; got a meeting with Peppa.” He would say.

Such compliance? From Ghost? How?

You all reached a conclusion because you needed an explanation that could make sense—Ghost wasn’t engaging with the therapist as much; he was opening up to the dog.

Peppa became his silent confidante.

He was playing with her and scolding her for eating too fast. Sometimes, he would ask her “why she was so sad” or “so devious” and why she was always drooling. In response, Peppa would just whine, wiggle her tail, or tilt her head, and Ghost would interpret her reactions as he pleased.

Although you could all see the improvement in his demeanour, you still worried about his well-being.

But whenever you asked him how he was, his response remained the same.

He was fine.

You tried to shift the focus and ask how the therapy was going instead. Yet, Ghost would still cling to his standard response.

Fine.

And then, the therapist advised to do something else instead.

“Ask him how Peppa is doing.”

And that simple question, about the dog’s well-being, unveiled the hidden side of his emotions. He would open up, and recount how Peppa was feeling a bit down one day, seemed too scared another day, or ate very little. He projected his own feelings and experiences onto the dog. He used her as a vessel to express his inner turmoil, revealing his struggles in a way that felt more comfortable and less vulnerable to him.

After all, it was the dog’s struggles, not his own.

He was fine.

“Do you think Peppa gets a payslip every month?” you joked one day as you looked at Peppa lying next to Ghost. “For having a job and all?”

“Peppa was a stray, you know; she always fought to survive.” he replied, kissing her head, “poor thing.”

“Poor thing,” you repeated, this time looking at him.

He knew he wasn’t fine. You all knew.

But Peppa didn’t pressure him to do or say anything.

She wouldn’t urge him to “talk to somebody” or “try meditation.”

She would insinuate, in her own way, that she was there for him.

Looking at him with her tongue out and a wide smile across her face.

Whining and demanding more pets.

Giving him the ball so they can play fetch.

Reminding him that caring for himself was just as important as those gentle scratches behind her ear.

“We’re in this together, human—you will be fine.”

——————————————————————

[evermoresversion]

Idk if you're already planning this but part 2 to driver license? If it was meant to be a 1 part type of thing, don't worry about it! You are just so good at writing cliffhangers lol

WANT YOU BACK, CONRAD FISHER.

PAIRING Conrad Fisher x Fem!Reader

TW/TAGS Angst, self sabotage, fluff at the end. There may be grammatical and spelling errors since English is not my first language.

SUMMARY Conrad was going through a difficult time so he decided it was best for the two of you to break up. Although after time he realizes that the best thing for both of you is to be together, so he takes you back.

SONG Want You Back by 5 Seconds Of Summer.

REQUESTS ARE OPEN | CONRAD'S MASTERLIST | MASTERLIST | PART ONE

Love. A beautiful and dangerous feeling, it can make you the happiest person as well as it can make you feel the most miserable.

Some people say that when you love something, you fight for it. But letting go is also loving.

So that's what Conrad did.

He thought and thought of a solution for your relationship with him. How he could let you into his soul and share what he was feeling when he found out about his mother's cancer, but he didn't want to share his pain. He didn't want you to feel like him.

Not after what you've had to go through after your father died of cancer too.

So he kept it all to himself.

What ended up exploding everything was that his silence made you interpret something else.

That he didn't love you anymore.

But damn, Conrad loved you, of course he did. How could he not?

You had been with him for a long time, despite everything, and that was why it was difficult to let you go, he didn't want to, but it would be more painful for both of you if he prolonged it any longer.

"So, that's it? You just decided you don't want anything to do with me, huh?" You let out a wry laugh, tears running down your cheeks. You cleaned them more aggressively than you intended and Conrad swore he felt his heart break in his chest.

He suddenly felt that the collar of his shirt was tighter than normal.

Sensing that a panic attack was coming, he couldn't say anything else. Although he wanted to, he couldn't.

"Ours is over." He managed to murmur without being able to look at you and you stifled a sob, nodding without looking at him neither. You finally left without saying another word.

The moment you left the house, Conrad felt like he could die right there.

But deep down, he knew that was for the best, even if you came to hate him.

But if it was the best, then why couldn't he stop thinking about you? Why did he keep stopping in front of your door but not knocking? Why did his body long to exist next to yours?

He sighed and sat on the seashore, thinking about what he could do.

He wanted you back.

"I was so stupid." He threw a rock into the sea.

But he won't make a move, not if it meant you could get hurt more.

Months passed and Conrad did not make another move.

Although when he saw you laughing with Jeremiah at a party, spending time with the girls, Conrad had the need to run to you and hug you so as not to let go of you ever again.

But that never happened.

Until one night when he was sitting in the living room of the summer house he decided it was time.

Then he heard the sound of a car engine shutting off near the sidewalk.

"Y/n." He muttered as he looked out the window and went straight to open the door of the house.

Your gaze collided with his and he could see all the damage he had caused in you by walking away.

Minutes that seemed eternal passed until you got out of the car and met him in the middle of the sidewalk.

His jaw was tense, holding back the urge to kiss you or hug you or both.

When he made to caress your cheek you threw yourself into his arms, forgetting everything that had happened before that moment.

And Conrad finally felt like he could breathe.

He hid his face in your hair, loving to finally have you in his arms once again.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

You didn't say anything at that moment but you let yourself be carried away by the heat of his body against yours.

"I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

disclaimer ── evermoresversion © 2023.

[lucielmars]

Why I think Geto's "meaning" is love and why Gojo failed to really understand him.

As I was writing the last chapter for my fic, I thought a lot about what Geto meant when he talked about "meaning" in the infamous KFC break-up scene. "You can kill me, there would be meaning in that."

Here is my theory : First of all, we know that as a teenager, he thought that being a sorcerer was meaningful because "the strong must protect the weak." I saw a lot of people interpret that as him meaning that the strong are responsible for the weak, due to their strength.

While I don't think that's what Geto meant by it, I do think that's how Gojo interpreted it.

See, Gojo was raised to become a sorcerer because he is strong. His strength is the justification for his exploitation since birth (the recent Gojo interview having confirmed that he was working even as a child.) He's also been brainwashed into thinking he tipped the balance of the universe and has to set it straight. So to him, although he's initially pissed off that he has to bear this responsibility, he interprets what Suguru says this way because it makes sense to him.

Gojo's moral compass will, inspired by Geto (but not properly understood), be focused on this idea of responsibility. That's why he kills Toji before he becomes dangerous, and that's why he takes Megumi and Tsumiki in not long after. That's why he became a teacher, because he felt responsible to make sure what happened to Geto doesn't happen again. That's Gojo's strength, but also his weakness. He doesn't really question the dangers his students face for most of the manga because he believes that they are also responsible for the weak (he's morally grey partly because of that).

However, what Geto actually means by it is that a society in which the strong don't protect the weak is a failing society because it is a society without love. It means we let the weak die just because they can't fight for themselves. He is correct, as many historians believe the first sign of civilization is a healed femur, a proof that we cared enough to protect someone until they healed.

When Gojo and Geto are friends, this difference in 'reason for being sorcerers' doesn't impact them negatively. When they protect Riko together, Gojo thinks he has a responsibility to let her make her own choice and help her, since she is weak compared to him. Geto, on the other hand, does it because he's grown attached to Riko. It works out. (Initially he agrees to it because he loves Gojo and wants to please him, he's the biggest simp fr.)

However when Riko dies and the cult claps they consequently analyze the situation very differently. Gojo asks Geto : Should I kill them ? (Meaning, I'm the strongest, it is my responsibility to kill curses and dangerous people). Geto tells him there would be no meaning in that, which means no love. Gojo would only be doing it because he has to, but it wouldn't save Riko, it wouldn't help anyone at the moment.

But then, while Gojo goes on thinking of this as his failure (he didn't protect someone he was responsible for), to Geto this event is life-altering. To someone who does things because of love, the idea that there could be people who clap for a kid's death, that Gojo almost died because Toji needed money, it's a brutal realization that they are being used. (Geto is kinda innocent for not realizing that sooner, Gojo isn't as naive.)

I think the whole "monkey" thing, refers to his understanding that non-sorcerers have a utilitarian relationship to sorcerers. They use them, they let them die. Even if most of them are unaware of that fact. To Geto, that makes them inferiors (unloving).

It also ties to Geto's deep-rooted feeling of being unloved (from his childhood I imagine, although we don't know that for sure, the fact that he killed his parents can't be random.) That's why when Gojo distances himself from him, he's deeply hurt by that.

Then Haibara dies and Geto, I think, gets even deeper into this spiral of anxiety that he will die unloved. At this point he's already suicidal, having lost what he thinks is his reason to live (+ his bff, who he doesn't understand anymore). But to know that two kids younger than him died as mere tools makes him realize that he will die like that too.

Then he finds Nanako and Mimiko, and he decides to love them. Since it's his way of functioning, it works for him. He can finally kill the people he hates, it is justified. There is a reason and a meaning to it (his daughters / the young sorcerers that he would save.)

He leaves Satoru with a last piece of philosophy, in two parts.

"Are you Satoru Gojo because you are the strongest, or are you the strongest because you are Satoru Gojo ?" To him Gojo is by definition associated with love. So what he's asking him is, is love driving you to become strong, or are you just willing to let them use you for your strength like a tool, give their meaning to your life ? Gojo has the wrong answer to this question (still does until the end)

"You could kill me, there would be meaning to that." Love, he means there would be love in that. Geto is willing to be killed by Satoru. He wants to die by his hand, because that would mean his life has meaning, and that he was killed for love (because Gojo didn't want to let him become a monster.)

That brings us to JJK0, when Suguru is acting all insane and attacks Gojo's student. I think he expected to die by Gojo's hand long ago, and he hates himself more and more with each passing days. There is no real love in what he's doing, it doesn't work for him and the system remains the same.

So he declares war and attacks Gojo's students, hoping Gojo will kill him (unconsciously.)

In the end, he gets to give his life "meaning" by dying by Gojo's hand. The person he loves preventing him from becoming a monster. It is love, and it is a curse.

As soon as he sees Gojo he is relieved. He is so ready to die by his hand. That's what he's been waiting for all along.

Gojo still believes he has to do it because it's his responsibility. He doesn't get it. He thinks he's giving justice, when in fact, he's giving mercy.

Which is also why I think Gojo says some version of "I love you" in that scene. I just know Geto got exactly what he wanted before he died, reassurance in every way, "meaning."

I could go on as to why it's also these differences in philosophy that made them love each other, but this is about to become a book SO.

[starfanatic]

Greek Mythology Headcanons pt.2

-Apollo has this constant need and desire for perfection. If he isn't perfect at something, he instantly tries to fix it. He constantly needs validation and praise from people in order to feel satisfied with himself. This behavior surprisingly came from Ares. Apollo feared being scorned by Zeus like Ares is, so he does anything in his power to be everything his father would want in a son. Beautiful, Charismatic, Strong, Fast, EVERYTHING.

-Nerites and Ganymede are super close friends. Both are lovers of the big three, so they got a LOT in common. Nerites is kind of the more outspoken and loud one, while Ganymede is sweet and quiet. Nerites is what made Ganymede feel so comfortable on Olympus, because at first Ganymede was too uncomfortable because he was a "mere" human among gods.

-On the other hand, Adonis and Hyacinthus was a odd but interesting duo in itself. Essentially, Adonis is just insane in half the shit he says or does, and Hyacinthus somehow gets convinced of it somehow. Just know that if you see Hyacinthus and Adonis running towards a specific direction... run. the. other. way.

-Athena does not understand emotions as much as she thinks. Ares is a natural at understanding and deciphering emotion, but for some reason she doesn't get it and it always bothered her. Even though she doesn't understand emotion doesn't mean she can't feel them, but she definitely doesn't express it a good way.

-Cronos could have been a good father. When Zeus was his cupbearer, Cronos often said that he saw Zeus as a son and constantly praised him left and right. He even displays sorrow for his lost children to Zeus' surprise. This is what makes it so hard for Zeus to kill him at the end, because Cronos kept screaming "TRAITOR" until he was thrown into tartarus.

-(This could be interpreted either way since I like them as friends but also as lovers) Hermes is oddly possessive over Apollo but nobody notices because of his innocent, care-free attitude. It's not possessive in a bad way, more like "It's my job to comfort and protect Apollo. What do you mean he has other friends? That's stupid!"

-Apollo almost never looks the same day to day. His hair is ALWAYS styled differently by a day to day basis. Sometimes its curly, sometimes it's pin straight. Sometimes it's tied up, other times its flowing down his back. Sometimes he wants to wear white, others he wants to wear red. That boy never stays consistent.

[i-like-forcefem]

Isaac found himself, once more, in an odd situation

He was chained to a wall, he looked at his shackles to see that there’s no real chain here, but he’s glued to the wall by this odd blue glow

He liked around the room to see something straight out of a fantasy film, stone walls and wooden furniture, a shelf filled with beakers filled with the oddest parts from animals

And out of the corner of his eye he noticed a box with frilly clothes…

“Great one of those dreams again” Isaac thought

Fuck, he tried to say, but nothing came out…

His mouth was gone

This wasn’t like the usual dreams

Then in walked in someone familiar, the usual tormentor for dreams like this…

This time he’s clad in a big purple cloak, with a massive pointy hat covering his ears

Isaac tried to laugh at Jermiah’s goofy get up, but no sound came out, his mouth was still absent

Jermiah walked up to the for once silent Isaac

They stared at each other for a second, Jermiah glanced across Isaac’s body, filling him with fear, out of habit he tried to insult his captor, but he has no mouth, Isaac realised just how much comfort the distraction of insulting his captor gave him

They share a moment of silence, until Jeremiah speaks

“It’s nice to hear you silent for once”

Isaac is furious, but cannot retort

“You see pet, I’ve grown a little tired of your constant whining, insults and lies, so I decided you’d be better of with no mouth at all”

Isaac glares at his captor

“It was a surprisingly easy spell, and now doing that got me thinking, why stop there?”

“You see I know you’ve been lying to yourself, you keep screaming how you’re a guy, you keep running away from any association with feminity, but we both know you really crave it”

Isaac starts getting flurstered, his mind filled with all the insults and interruptions he wishes he could scream out right now, but he has no mouth

“Now you like feminity, and I think I’d like to be taken care of for once, so I believe we can reach a nice middle ground”

“I’ll use a simple spell to turn you into my doll”

“Dolls have a duty to look pretty, dolls have a duty to serve their creators, and dolls don’t have mouths to spit insults with, an ideal situation is it not?”

Isaac looks in fear his mind raising for what he can do to stop this

“Oh and I forgot to mention: I only know how to make female dolls, so I hope you don’t mind permanently being a feminine servant”

Isaac notices his tail starts to wag, how he who he’s he could just grab it to stop this humiliation, but his bindings are in place

He can’t even make any excuses… his captor can interpret this however he wants

Jeremiah silently smiles

“Now the spell is quite powerful, so as a first component I’ll need to ask you to now state it if you don’t want this spell used on you”

Isaac is relieved! He violently shakes his head, harder than he’s ever shook before, maybe the spell won’t be used!

“I’m not hearing a No, so let’s get started shall we my dear doll?”

Isaac feels his heart skip a beat

“First Lets change your form”

Jeremiah snaps his fingers, and suddenly Isaac feels his shackles release

He tried to run for it, but as he does he hears a SNAP and feels himself lifted into the air

“Now let’s get started” SNAP

Isaac feels his legs suddenly feel stiff, he touches his leg with his hand and feels… wood? plastic? He can’t quite place the texture, but it’s cold and-SNAP

His chest is plastic now too, he notices how he can’t feel his shirt anymor-SNAP

The transformation is up to his arms now, he looks at Jeremiah trying to scream at him to stop or at least wait one goddamn second before snapping again

“Am I going to fast?” Snap Isaac’s hands are now transformed, he glares at Jeremiah “well I thought we better get it over with, since I know you’ll love the next step” SNAP

Isaac’s head is transformed

He notices the lack of heat or cold most of all

Just a complete lack of sensation

“Now don’t you look lovely! It fits you a lot better then I dared imagine!”

“Now on to the next step: your Mind" Jeremiah smiles at Isaac, who's fear is no longer present on his face "we'll do 2 things, first we'll make you Obedient" SNAP

Isaac is gently dropped on the floor

He wastes no moment and runs for the do-"Stop"

Isaac stops

"Good" Jeremiah smiles "Sit and Listen"

Isaac Sits

"You will no longer be able to go against my word, don't worry I won't abuse this, I just want a little more help around the house is all"

Isaac notices how he's never before truly listened to anything his Master said, he's always been to worried about how he'd retort, it's nice to just sit here and listen he's glad he was ordered to do th

MASTER?!!??!?!?

"You might be undergoing some minor mental changes, but don't worry you'll get used to them in time"

...Master?!?

Isaac really doesn't know what he's going to think

"Now before we move on to the next step, I want to show you something, Come and Look in that mirror"

Isaac Comes

Isaac Looks

He sees, a more feminine estimation of his past self, he notices the slight budding of breasts, he notices the smooth texture his whole body is now made off, the beady-move less eyes, and the ever present lack of a mouth, he sees a female doll

Why does he like the sight? Must be due to fufilling his Masters orders and all the other magic his Bast- Wonderful Master has done for him

"You turned out extremely pretty, if I can say so myself"

"Now get Dressed, Pick out something you Like from the box"

Isaac looks through the Box

He quickly finds a classic Maid Outfit

Isaac gets Dressed

He's so embarrassed why is this the best clothing his Wonderful Master can provide him? His Master is so Great and Lovely, and maybe he should forgive his Amazing Handsome Master for not providing less femine options, that sounds good

WHAT IS THIS MAGIC DOING TO HIS BRAIN?!!?

"Now for the final step: Your Self" SNAP

Isaac braced herself for the final change

She looked around, seeing how her body is still the same, surprised and slightly relieved that the spell didn't work on her

Her...

HER?

Wait no she's a girl? No a Woman? A lady? A DOLL! ISAAC IS NOT A MAN SHE IS A GIRL

Why does she think this way!?!?!? Why did her wonderful master need to do this to her?? Wasn't the amazing and beautiful body she had gotten enough? Did she really need to be blessed with a better self image? No she wasn't blessed! I mean her Master did cast an amazing spell on her

But she's a Girl, NO A GIRL, A GIRL

Why can't she think straight?!!?

"You're so cute when you're flustered"

Her Master is so amazing, smart and handsome

WHY CAN'T SHE THINK!?!?!

"Now one last thing, I was going to return your mouth, but I’m quite enjoying the silence, you don’t mind staying this way do you Doll?”

She looks at her amazing Master, and cannot find it in herself to react

“You’re so adorable" her Master patted her head, it felt wonderful "well I guess you can stay silent then, but give me one second, Wait here”

Isaac Waits

He returns, holding a notebook “here you go dear doll, if there’s ever anything I can do for you write it on here and show me the note”

He is too kind, too considerate, the doll feels she doesn’t deserve all this…

But maybe being the doll for such a kind Master isn't the worst thing in the world

And now she thinks about it her generous Master also mentioned that one of the duties of a doll was to look good right? She's now curious what other dresses the box holds

Also looking around the room she notices her wonderful Master did not keep it properly tidy, why hasn't her genius Master ordered her to clean it yet? She'd really like such an order

She's bouncing in place actually, she's really excited to clean

"Is there something you want doll? If so just Write"

She Writes

"Well if you want to, then sure Clean!"

She scurries off instantly, starting with dusting and planning ahead for how to reogrinize all the books and materials thrown around the room

"Hahaha, you can get quite passionate can't you?"

She's busy dusting the main table, but still listens intently to each of her amazing Masters words

"You know I've been quite worried about you, I never really knew what to do with you, or what you wanted, everything I did got a response with screams and slurs"

She is dutifully dusting the shelves, and her Master is too kind

"I'm not one to say this stuff normally, I think neither of us are, but I care about you, a lot, and I'm glad to finally see you excited about something, as a magician I can tell, you wanted this didn't you?"

She feels as if she would cry, if she could, but she can't so she continues dusting, she'll do anything for her Master

Now and forever